#i cant believe i wrote this in a few hours

[softness-and-shattering]

Thank Gd for my shower chair.

This is your sign to buy the aid youve been considering. I have never regretted a disability aid purchase. What I use less I needed at the time and if I need it again I need it.

I was gifted a second hand grabby stick in need of a clean. Havent cleaned it. Used it once and was grateful for it.

[latinthusiast]

Anchises to Aeneas:

o gnate, ingentem luctum ne quaere tuorum "son, do not ask about the immense grief of your people"

scene reimagined in the goriest way possible in Lucan's Bellum Civile:

Erictho's reanimated soldier to Sextus Pompey:

tu fatum ne quaere tuum "do not ask about your own fate"

[cxrsed-angel]

Similar Worries

Word count: 3k

Warnings: angst, age gap (reader in her 20s, joel in his 50s).

A/N: I wrote this immediately after ep 6. There are spoilers for the episode. gif credits: @joel-miller

You had been walking in the woods for few hours after you left the couple’s cabin. You were in the back talking to Ellie, telling her how she cant go around tell people they’re like a thousand, especially when they didn't kill you and had given you soup.

When you see Joel stop walking, you walk up closer and see him breathing heavier. You put your hand on his shoulder, watching in fear as he grabbed his chest; you didn't know what to do if he had a heart attack in the middle of the fucking woods in the snow. 

“Joel, what's wrong, are you okay.” you watch in a panic as he nods his head, but he's still breathing heavily. You look around, trying to find somewhere for him to sit but there’s nothing. You try to calm yourself because the last thing you need is to freak out, making Ellie even more scared. You turned to look at Ellie but she was frozen in fear staring as Joel continue struggling to breathe behind you. Your attention is back on him when you heard his voice. 

“Im fine, just the cold air.” he said slowly, still trying to catch his breath; Ellie nods and walks closer.  But you stay silent, frozen in fear trying to rake your brain for any information on heart attacks but you come up blank. You realized didn't know what you would do if he had a heart attack; you're more mad at yourself at the fact that this situation hadn’t even crossed your mind. 

“Good because I don't know what we would do if you had a fucking heart attack right there.” You hear Joel let out a small laugh at Ellie’s joke as she lightly slapping his back as the two of them continued to walk ahead. But you didn't believe him. Ellie was right; what do you do if he has fucking heart attack in the middle of the goddamn forest in the snow. You knew it was something more than the cold air but decided not to press on it. But you kept an eye on him the rest of the way. 

The whole time you were walking, you were quiet. You tried not to show it but, it really scared you, it made you realize how old Joel was compared to; you always knew of course. When he complained about his knees when going upstairs, he talked about his back pain from sleeping on the ground countless nights. But it was always light-hearted, not life or death. You knew he had bad hearing from shooting, but this scared the shit out of you. 

When you were surrounded by the group, you saw Joel was different again, he was off, but you didn't have time to focus on it. You were just relieved they didn't shoot anyone. As you rode on the back of Joel’s horse, all that replayed in your head was how Joel seemed off. Something in his eyes that you couldn't quite figure out. You think back and remember he seemed off ever since you guys had left Kanas; you just never noticed until now, and with the troubled breathing, you were starting to get concerned. 

After Maria and Tommy gave you guys food and told you what house you would be in you immediately needed to show, you also thought it was best to let Joel talk to his brother alone. You went into what you assumed was the main bedroom to shower. After the shower and changing into some clothes, you sit on the bed, and you could hear Maria come and talk to Ellie, you knew you should see what they were talking about, but you figured Maria wouldn't do anything. As you sit on the bed, you couldn't stop seeing Joel struggling to breathe, and how helpless you were, you didn't know what to do, you couldn't save him you just watched. You had gotten lucky today, but one day you're not gonna be lucky; what if you can't save him, just freeze there like you did today? Tears fall down your face as you realize how little you could do.

You hear boots come in the room and assume it was Joel; you look up and see him looking at you. You could tell had been crying, you expect him to sit down next to you, but he stays standing, staring at you. “Have you been crying,” you asked quietly, looking at him, You could see in his eyes something wasn't right, and you wondered if it was something had happened. You waited for him to say something, but he remained silent, staring at you. You try not to sniffle but couldn't help it. 

“Have you been crying.” he repeats as he steps closer to the bed, but you weren't gonna let him change the topic off of him. 

“You first.” you said through snuffles. 

“It was just emotionally seeing Tommy, that's all.” you stare back at him, you knew it wasn't that, and you were a little offended that he thought that would work on you. You knew him better than that. But two could play that game. 

You took your shoes off and climb up into bed and lie down. Joel watches you, confused with frown eyebrows. You let out a fake cry, “it's my period, my emotions and hormones and everything.” You tell him with exaggerated sadness laced in your voice. You knew you were being childish, but you didn't care; you weren't gonna let him get away with that shitty lie. 

He rolls his eyes at your sarcasm as he gives you a deadpan stare. “Really?” was all he said, which made you even more upset. You sit up on the bed and stand up, glaring at him as he remained on the bed. You had been worried all day about him, and he wanted to be closed off to you; you weren't gonna take it. 

“No Joel don't “really” me you know  it's bullshit either tell me or dont tell me, but dont lie to me, god forbid I ask you what's wrong.” you couldn't stand him right now you turn to leave the room, but he voice stopped you making you turn around. 

“We’re staying here,” he mumbled quietly as he stares at the ground, adverting your eyes. You frown at him, not understanding what he meant. You hated when he talked in half sentences leaving out details. Who was we, why are we staying here, and also, why had he been crying? 

“What” you asked sternly, pissed at him for not being clear and deflecting the topic yet again. You walk closer to him, narrowing your eyes at him, waiting for Joel to answer. Joel sighs before looking up into your eyes, “You and I are staying in Jackson, it's safe they have food and shelter it's better for you.” he explains, but his voice is still shaky you could tell he was leaving something out and considering the fact he didn't mention Ellie you knew there was more than what he was saying. Also, he didn't talk to you about it; if you wanted to stay or not, you weren't gonna let him dictate where you go and make important choices without. 

You nod, “okay, well me and Ellie will go to the fireflies to make a cure, you can stay here and live out your suburban fantasy okay.” you replay, full of sarcasm; you watch as Joel's face frowns in frustration. He shakes his head and puts his face in his hands for a few minutes before looking back at the ground. 

“You and I are staying, Tommy is taking Ellie, he’s made the trip before, and he can handle it.”. You were getting tired and annoyed with this whole conversation going in circles and getting nowhere. You didn't understand why he wanted to leave Ellie; why didn't he want to continue? You’ve already gotten this far. But you stopped and remembered earlier when he couldn't breathe, and it clicked. You saw it in his eyes when Sam attacked Ellie when the dog started sniffing Ellie. It wasn't a heart attack. It was a panic attack. He was scared. 

Your eyes softened when you realized and came and sit down next to him. You place your hand on his face, slowly turning it, so he's looking at you. “Joel it wasn't the cold air wasn't it,” you stare full of concern into his brown eyes. You knew you were right when you see a tear fall down his cheek. You grab his hand in yours, rubbing it slowly; you didn't say anything, just waiting until he was ready. 

It was quiet for a moment as he cried silently before speaking again. “I get these dreams it’s a different situation, but they all end the same you or Ellie, or hell sometimes the both of you, dead while I just stand there frozen not doing anything, just like I did with-” you watch, choke back a sob before continuing. “Im just failing, I failed Tess, and Sarah, and in my dreams, I fail you and Ellie that’s all I do is fail.” his voice breaks at the end of the sentence as he continues to cry. 

You feel your heart break at how much pain he has been in and how this had been hurting him for so long. You reach up to his face wiping the tears as they continue to fail. You stay silent, waiting for him to finish. You feel him lean into your hand as you gently caressed his face. He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath before continuing. 

“I don't know what I’ll do if something happened to you or Ellie, I froze when that kid came up behind me, too damn old to hear them and too slow to do something. I couldn't hear when Henry and Sam snuck up on us. It's only a matter of time before I fuck up and put someone in danger, until I freeze at the wrong time again. Lately I've been so godman scared that my heart feels like it stopping and-” 

“and you can't breath and you get dizzy like you're gonna pass out.” you interrupt him, knowing how it feels. You see his eyes widen a little when you describe what happens. You’ve had panic attacks before you knew they were scary as shit. You remember the first time you felt one you thought you were dying. 

You wipe another tear that falls from his eyes. “They happen to me too sometimes, not as bad when I was on my own after my parents died. I used to get them almost every day then, I got one the first time I saw a clicker all,  I did was crouch down to the floor into ball and cried until it went away then I ran. You’re not failing Joel, you arent gonna fail, You didnt fail when you got us out of Kansas with all those infected and a whole town chasing after us.” you looked into his eyes, but you could tell he was still uncertain, they were still full of worry and disbelief 

“Joel its okay to be afraid I’m fucking terrified almost all the time, Im scared that one of us is gonna catch a cold in the middle of the winter and die, Im scared Im gonna sneeze at the wrong time a room full of clickers and get ripped apart, Im scared-” you paused as you felt your tears coming again, “Im scared Im not gonna be able to protect you, that something gonna happen and I won't be able to do anything to help you.” you smile faintly “I guess we have similar fears huh Texas” you tried to lighten the mood as you continue to cry. 

You see him start to smile too through the tears; his hand came up and wiped your tears. You feel his hand wrap around your waist, pulling you into a hug as your cries came out harder. You thought back on how you thought he was having a heart attack and how helpless you were. 

“You fucking scared me back there, thought you were having a heart attack or something.” you pull away looking into his eyes as yours were filled with tears. “I cant fucking save you from a heart attack Joel, you get shot I know what to do, you get stabbed I know what to but-” You feel yourself choke on your sobs, unable to speak for a second. “I always thought a bite was the worst I had to worry about, you cant come back from a bite, I cant do anything about that, I made peace with that, but what about heart attack, or heart failure, what the fuck do I do then?” You cry out as he pulled back into a hug, rubbing your back as you try to steady your breath. 

You close your eyes as you relax against his chest, and you stay there, in each other embrace, as your comfort each other through your similar worries. Joel pulls away first gazing into your teary eyes. He wants to comfort you, reassure you, but nothing comes out of his mouth. He wants to tell you that nothing gonna happen to him, but he can't. He understands where you're coming from, he's nearing his 60s while you're still in your 20s. He hates himself for allowing you to get this close; he knew you were younger, that you deserved someone better than an old man. But you convinced him, told him over and over that you only wanted him. 

“How about we cross that bridge when we get there okay honey.” he attempted to reassure you but you looked into his eyes, seeing the wrinkles around the outside of his eyes, across his forehead, and lining the rest of his face, the grey in his facial hair and you couldn't you, couldn't do that because you’ll be unprepared when you got to that bridge there’s no crossing it. 

You shake you head as you feel your eyes filling with tears again, “I cant Joel, I cant fucking wait because we wont cross it I will, just me and Ellie watching as you fall to the ground unable to do shit.” Your lips trembling thinking about him being in pain and dying while you stand there frozen with Ellie in horror helplessly. “I dont want to lose you Joel not like that.” you whispered before leaning back into his arms. 

Joel thought about it and knew you were right; he knew you were gonna worry yourself to death about his health, and there want much else he could do to change that at the moment. So he just continued holding you in his arms, racking his brain for a solution but there wasn't an easy fix. He thinks about your words earlier, and how you were so good and quick to guarantee that he hasn't failed and that he wasn't going to, he wanted to do the same for you. But he couldn't find the right then to say, so he let you sob into his shoulder until he hears you stop.

“My brother gonna be a dad.” you widen your eyes at the sentence he just blurted out; you pull away, wiping the tears and snot off your face; you stare into his eyes, confused, until you realized what's happening. “You dont know what to say do you.” you watched as he nodded his head, disappointed at himself for not being able to get his words out, but you didn't blame him; you knew he said more through actions. You remember the first time he tried to say you’re more than a friend to him and watched as he continuously rambled about how much you mean to him and getting so far off topic he started using construction terms as a metaphor for your relationship. You knew what he meant. But you let him continue fumbling over his words before saying you felt the same. Since then, you’ve got used to him showing how he cares about you through his action and not getting too mad at his lack of communication. 

“Do you wanna talk about that or were you just trying to lighten the mood.” You asked him. You knew talking about babies, and parenting was hard for him, but you were unsure if he was ready to talk about how that information was affecting him. You watched as he shook his head and knew he was trying to lighten the mood; at least that was his intention, not quite sure it worked. 

“Trying to lighten the mood but I think I did the opposite.” he replied with an unsure smile; you let out a small laugh at his awkwardness, finding it cute. You nod and leaned forward, kissing his cheek. Before laying in the bed, you watch as he took his shoes off and joined you, laying in front of you pressing his back against you chest. Your arms wrap around his waist as you relaxed against him. You knew that both you and him had a lot of things that you’ll probably never gonna heal from or not worry about. You knew there's always gonna be a wound and hole in him from his daughter, and you were always gonna worry about him and his health, But at least you had each other at this moment; that was all you focused on. 

“I love you Joel, I know its hard but well figure it out, well get through this together, you arent alone.” you spoke softly as your head lay on his shoulder. You feel his hand come on top of yours as it rested on his stomach, rubbing them. 

“I know baby, I-uh I love you too.” he whispers back; you smile against his shoulder as he verbally said it back for the first time. You didn't want to make too big a deal of it; you always knew he loved you. He showed it in multiple ways, but you will admit it sounded nice. you snuggled up, pulling him closer into your chest as you closed your eyes and let this awful day end.

[seeminglydark]

Idk if this means anything to you but I'm a comic artist who's had a hard time doing art for a few years. The first four was because of life hardship and lack of time/chronic pain, but now lately I've had time but a mental block. I'm creeping up on 30 and felt bad about myself for "missing out" on my opportunity to be a comic artist. It was really validating to see you post about being 41 (correct me if I'm wrong) especially since you have such wonderful comics that I've been following for a while now. It makes me feel less like I'm wasting my time putting my things in order when I "should" be drawing.

Hopefully this doesn't come across as offensive or anything. It was just comforting and validating. Anyway, big fan! Love your characters a whole lot and hope you have a good day!

Dear Anon

I am 41 years old. I have wanted to make comics my entire life. before my dad got sick, and my childhood kinda fell apart, all i did was draw. after that, i used the stories in my head to cope. life moved on. i was convinced not to accept a partial scholarship to an art school in California. life got hard. i worked at a hotel, and after i escaped an abusive relationship at 22 i hitchhiked/bused far far away to start over. i tried to make comics again, but i had to survive, and so i got another job doing the only thing i knew how to do, hotels. and i worked. and worked. and life got harder and times got heavier and i didn't get time to draw and i worked double hours, 15 to 17 hours a day. and i went four years without drawing a single thing.

i kept working myself into the ground. i was 29 now. i picked up a pen again and drew a red haired boy. he had a hard life and no love and no friends. his problems were on the outside, for everyone to see. he ran away but his problems went with him.

i was 32. surely i was too old now. my time to be an artist was gone. i had no school. no hope. i was so far behind the younger gen i saw online. i cried. all the time. i wrote stories in my email drafts while i worked shifts. i stayed up late trying to learn how to draw again. i cried some more. the boy grew. i called him Fiach. worthy. a raven. later i renamed him Avery. he was like a bird, he had wings, he was my hope. i started writing some friends for him. the people i wished i had around me.

i started finding time and space. i got a new job, something where i was lucky enough to set my own hours. for the first time i had a partner who believed in me. things were hard. but i was drawing now. and that helped.

i went on a road trip and i started drawing pages of an unnamed story on 6 by 8 paper in a sketchbook. i drew 20 of them. 'what could i call this?' i thought. Nothing Seems as Dark...no says my partner. Seemingly Dark. he made me a logo. i was 35. i bought an ipad, i cant do this on paper, its too much story i have too much to say. so i learned how to draw digitally by tracing my own trad art pages.

I spoke to my dad for the last time on June 17th, fathers day that year. he said 'you're good. i'm proud. and you're gonna do amazing things. none of this is your fault. and we will speak again soon.' i didn't know id never hear his voice again. he died a week later.

i turned 36. i kept trying. i'm old, i don't understand the internet. how can i share this?

i stumbled across Lore Olympus. i was introduced to webcomics. id read comics online before but the thought never occurred to me. i opened an account on Tapas. and then i stared at it. what if no one likes it. what if its bad. my art isn't good. i should wait til i'm better. but will i ever really be better? or will i always believe that tomorrow is better? do it now. if even one person gets something out of this story, this story about a boy who is you, a boy who looking for hope, a boy who might make it, then that is enough isn't it.

June 17th 2018 i launched Seemingly Dark.

SD's five year anniversary is in a week. 0ver 700 pages. leaps and bounds in progress with my skills. a printed comic under my belt as of monday. i was always a storyteller. but i was always an artist too.

I am 41 years old, dear anon. I did not truly embark on this journey til i was 35. life got in the way. even now, chronic illness gets in the way. but its worth it. its never ever too late. i believe in you the way my dad believed in me. i reset my life again and again. but I was always an artist. and if thats who you are, and who you want to be, even if things dont go the way you wished they could, you're an artist too.

im 41 years old. i speak about my age, even though i often feel too old to belong in spaces, cuz really, in this case age is just a number. take care of yourself. do what you need to do. and little by little, when your able, carve out your space until it becomes more of a habit. sometimes i think about all the years i lost not drawing or creating. but there's a lot of factors that make me believe had i made my story then, it wouldn't be the story it is now, i needed to live a bit. i needed to find myself. i know this was long, but i just wanted you to see i also had to put my life in order, and getting notes like this reminds me it wasnt at all a waste. im glad i could offer you some comfort. thats honestly the best compliment i could ever receive.

TL;dR I was 35 when i sat down and seriously started making comics, because life always got in the way and so did my confidence. i always feared being too old. im 41 now, still going strong.

[natsglorifiedsimp]

Super tits?

Wanda x reader :)

Here is the fic you've been asking for.

I didn't put a taglist cause IDK if you'll like it

"Delivery!" someone shouted at the door. You furrowed your eyebrows. Who ordered food?

"Babe!" you called out. "Did you order food?"

"No!" Wanda shouted back, still enjoying her shower.

"Who the hell is this?" you whispered to yourself. You opened the door and plastered a smile on your face. "Hello," you awkwardly said.

Receiving deliveries wasn't your thing. It was Wanda's. So you never knew what to say.

"Delivery from an anonymous person," the delivery man said. You furrowed your eyebrows more. "Anonymous?"

The man nodded. He gave the flowers to you and wrote something in his notes and left you with a typical ‘Have a nice day’.

"Who was it?" Wanda sneaks behind you. "Jeez!" you jumped. "Don't scare me like that!" you scowled.

Wanda chuckled. "Sorry," she feigns.

Your scowl turned to a cheeky smile.

"What?" Wanda asked confused. "Why are you smiling like that?"

"Anonymous delivery?" you showed her the flower she ordered. "Thank you" you shyly said, swaying like a kid.

Wanda furrowed her eyebrows, "I did not order that" she deadpanned.

"Oh please," you rolled your eyes. "Cut the act." you examined the flower and noticed a small letter. "A letter too huh?" you smirked at Wanda. "Very romantic." you chuckled.

Wanda curiously looked at the letter, "That's not my handwriting," she coldly said.

A flower for the most beautiful girl in the world. Get ready tonight ;)

-S.T.

"S.T? Who's that? Super Tits?" you mocked looking at your girlfriend.

"I did not get that for you" she deadpanned.

You furrowed your eyebrows, "Then who gave this to me?"

"I don't know" she shrugged. "Maybe your mistress"

You whipped your head to the brunette, "My what now?"

"Guessing I'm always gone for missions you decided to do some extracurricular activities." she coldly gaze at you.

"You don't seriously think I have a mistress" you scoffed.

"THEN WHO'S THAT FROM?" she shouted.

"I DON'T KNOW!" you shouted back. "I thought it was from you. Why would I even say thank you to you if I know it's from someone else?"

"I don't know" she shrugged. "For a cover up"

"It's not from my mistress and I don't have one," you annoyingly said. "I can't believe you're blaming me for having one" you sighed.

"Tell that to the flower" she slammed the door on her way out.

"Wand-" you cut yourself off. "But I don't know who gave this to me" you exasperatedly sighed.

After a few minutes of pondering, someone knocked at your door again.

"I swear if this is another-"

"Did someone deliver a flower here?" Tony asked. You angrily gazed at Tony. "What? What did I do?"

"Is this yours?" you said holding the flower out.

"Yes." he snatched the flower from you. "It was supposed to be delivered at Pepper's office," he said while straightening the bouquet.

"We had a full-blown argument because of this" you panicked. "and you're telling me it's from you."

"Ugh why did they put S.T. instead of T.S." he grumbled.

"YOU!" you paused. "WILL HELP ME FIND WANDA"

You dragged confused Tony out of the compound.

---

You've been driving around the area. Even examined all the crevices of the compound but no Wanda was found.

You hated fighting and you hated when you can't find Wanda anywhere without even a text or a call back from her.

"Tony" you hiccuped. "What's the use of your advanced technology? You cant find Wanda" you sobbed.

You've been wailing and panicking in the back of the car for the past few hours because you cant find Wanda anywhere.

"I'm sorry, I'm trying. Wanda has powers you know." Tony tried to comfort you but it made you sob more.

"I want Wanda" you wailed. You lay down on the seats and rested in a fetal position.

Tony didn't know what to do and decided to spam Wanda with calls. And after the 15th try, she finally picked up.

"FINALLY!" He exclaimed. "Your wife has been ugly sobbing for the past hour. Where the fuck are you?" he grumbled.

"I'm just at the back of the compound." Wanda sighed. "Is she okay?"

"Yes, aside from the fact that she been ranting at me for making you mad about the flower which by the way was mine." Tony pointed out.

"It was yours?" now Wanda felt bad.

"Yes! Now drop your dramatic act and quit messing with my advanced technology." Tony rolled his eyes.

"Where's Y/n?" Wanda asked.

"At the back of the car and-" Tony looked at you finding you sleeping with worried eyebrows. "She's sleeping"

"Keep it that way" Wanda said.

"Sure as hell don't wanna hear her sob again" Tony deadpanned.

----

"Get in." Tony ushered Wanda.

Wanda hurriedly opened the back seat and found you sleeping with tear tracks on your cheeks, puffy eyes, and a small pout. She slowly lifted your head supporting your neck and shoulders and laid your head on her lap.

She ran her hand through your hair and smiled when you moved and curled up on her tummy.

"So now you're being sweet?" Tony rolled his eyes.

Wanda throw a gaze at the man and all Tony did was ignore it. "You have mind-reading powers and you didn't believe y/n when she said it's not from a 'mistress'."

---

Wanda felt bad for making you cry and worry. Accusing you of something that you didn't even do made her feel bad that she bought flowers and chocolates while you were sleeping.

"Baby," she whispered. "Wake up"

"Are you holding flowers and chocolates?" you questioned with eyes shut.

"Eh no?" she murmured.

"I want cuddles not flowers" you urged. "And I want to sleep"

"Okay," Wanda giggled complying.

[ad-hawkeye]

wanted to know if you ever got to read artem’s pool/8 ball card i thought the event story was cute but i was a wee bit curious on your thoughts on the card

I JUST FINISHED IT!!!!!!!!! AS WE SPEAK!!! i have a whole list of my thoughts HAHA SORRY FOR THE RAMBLING IN ADVANCE

"artem had to join a pool club for work" is one of the better excuses to give him a new hobby, ill begrudgingly give them that

im glad artem still has the alcohol tolerance of a squirrel. do NOT let this man go off by himself he will accidentally take a sip of alcohol and then need a time out in the corner.

"is it that obvious?" yes, artem.

mc making sure artem eats a fucking meal is rly cute LMFAO

mc ordering artem a non-alcoholic drink is also sweet. i remember i wrote a fic (all the way back in like 2021 after reading atmospherics) where i wrote abt artem going out of his way to drink mocktails after all of that. genuinely really happy to see that's canon.

i've noticed newer ssrs are just. shorter? first year ssrs tended to be like, over an hour long when put on auto. but newer ones are only 40 mins on auto. laaaame. but then again with the overall writing quality, maybe they're just putting us out of our misery.

ah yes. artem getting surprised by mc kissing his cheek in public. what a sly sex chad. did they get the only good artem writer left at hoyoverse on this card or something

artem being exhausted from socializing is a mood. girl same.

the way these two talk about alcohol sends me. dear god artem we can let you have a sip oh god. OH JESUS CHRIST ARTEM NO --

this story is cute enough to make me sad. godddd. it's really nice to see artem more casual and open, esp since this story is more in character.

THE IRISH GOODBYE?? ARTEM LMFAO.

mutuals meet me in the secret passage of the pool place

sneaking out by running is giving the same energy as his revisiting youth ssr where they decided to sneak to the school's roof and hide from the security guards lmfao. ah. the nostalgia.

AND this ssr acknowledges artem's love of movies?? YES

STOP KISSING IN THE STORAGE ROOM GUYS THE CINEMA STAFF IS GOING TO FIND YOU!!!!!!!!!!!! DEAR GOD

"this should be filmed in slow motion" LMFAO

JUMPSCARE. JUMPSACRE. NEW ARTEM EXPRESSION. JUMPSCARE. HOLY FUCK

i sincerely think a full on artem smile is all i ever wanted back in the day i cant believe i fucking got it in the POOL CARD OF ALL CARDS

"was something set up incorrectly?" "[artem pout] probably."

mc taking a pic of his stupid distracted expression is amazing and him getting blushy about it is even funnier

"was it too sour?" "yeah...."

thank god pathetic artem is back

nevermind he is licking her arm like a dog. tot's fascination with licking will never fail to amuse me. this is like when my dog licks my leg in the middle of the night

if one sip of alcohol fucks him up this bad i'd hate to see what happens when he's a few shots in. mr wing breaking it down sloppy style on the floor (not clickbait)

STOP LICKING EACH OTHER YOU FREAKS

i think artem should trip a few more times it's funny

this is the closest we've gotten to artem fessing up about atmospherics i can fucking taste it

NOOOO THEY FUMBLED IT. NO ATMOSPHERICS MENTION. ENDING IT ALL. GOD DAMN IT

i can forgive this bc the running joke of them missing scenes in a movie is back

all in all as far as post second anniversary cards go, this one wasn't bad at all and had a lot of cute moments. a few weird ones (which is to be expected at this point ig), but mostly cute!! it made me miss my fav artem cards but in a good way. siiigh ;_;;;

[sicknessbysalem]

for monthofsick you wrote about a half ghost character and his vampire mentor. i dont remember names at the moment, but would you be interested in possibly writing fic for them again. This time with the half ghost getting sick, maybe with the dialogues “Will you talk to him? He won’t listen to me.” / "He's too stubborn for his own good." / “Does he look pale to you?" /“My stomach really doesn’t feel good all of a sudden”

Or any combo of those really? Thank you!!

I cant believe someone sent me this/remembered those characters!

I changed a bit of the lore and the name of the half ghost character to something i liked better!

so may i offer Hemlock (a half ghost half human apprentice), and his mother and father figures and teachers, Seraphina and Amancio.

tw for supernatural (not the show) characters {witches, half human half ghost, and a vampire}, emeto, overwork, self pressure, fear of disappointment, emeto

if you have any questions, comments, or requests, send them my way!

Hemlock's room was a dim sanctuary within the sprawling, ancient mansion. Dust motes danced in the slivers of morning light that pierced the heavy, velvet drapes, casting an ethereal glow over the worn hardwood floor. The ornate, brass clock on the mantel ticked relentlessly, its hands pointing to an hour well past dawn.

Normally, Hemlock would have been awake long before now, his restless nature never allowing him more than a few hours of sleep. Yet today, the quiet shadows of his room held him captive, wrapping him in a cocoon of fitful slumber.

He awoke abruptly, his body heavy and his mind foggy. The moment he opened his eyes, a wave of nausea washed over him, accompanied by a dull ache that radiated from his bones.

Hemlock blinked, trying to clear his vision, but the world remained a blur, the edges of reality fuzzed and indistinct.

With a groan, he forced himself to sit up. His head throbbed, each pulse a reminder of the unnatural duality that existed within him.

Being half-ghost, half-human was a precarious balance, and today, it seemed, the scales were tipped unfavorably.

Hemlock’s ghostly side amplified his human frailties, turning a simple illness into something more sinister.

He glanced at the clock, his heart sinking. He was late for his lesson with Amancio. Panic flared briefly, but he quickly suppressed it. Amancio was known for his patience. Amancio was gentle, Seraphina not so much. But he had a lesson with Amancio, and Amancio always worked with him. Plus, surely, he had never been late before, therefore Amancio couldn’t be mad.

ADditionally, Amancio he had a deep well of curiosity and an even deeper commitment to training his proteges. Hemlock knew that, much like himself, the revelation of possible illness would peak Amancio’s interest and they both could explore the effects of his duality on something as mundane as a cold or whatever this was.

Well, not a cold. Hemlock felt nauseous. So, whatever it was, maybe his duality would help him. Or hurt him. He was interested to find out and surely Amancio would be too.

Ignoring the protests of his body, Hemlock swung his legs over the side of the bed. The cold floor sent a shiver through him, but he welcomed the sharp sensation. It was a reminder that he was still here, despite the ghostly tendrils that threatened to pull him into the abyss.

He dressed quickly, his movements slow and deliberate. Each task felt monumental—buttoning his shirt, tying his boots—yet he persevered, driven by a determination to not let his ghostly affliction hinder his progress.

He caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror; his usually bright eyes were dull, ringed with dark circles, and his skin had taken on a pallor that was almost translucent. He looked more ghost than human today, and between the exhaustion and his appearance he wanted nothing more than to laugh at how ridiculous this was.

Steeling himself, Hemlock left his room and made his way through the labyrinthine corridors of the mansion. The air was thick with the scent of old wood and lingering magic, a testament to the building’s long and storied history. As he approached Amancio’s study, his steps grew heavier, and his breath came in shallow gasps.

The door to the study was ajar, and Hemlock paused briefly before pushing it open. Inside, Amancio stood by the window, his tall, lean figure framed by the morning light.

His dark hair, flecked with silver, was tied back neatly, and his piercing blue eyes were fixed on the grounds outside. The vampire’s presence was commanding, exuding an aura of both power and elegance.

Amancio turned as Hemlock entered, his gaze focusing on Hemlock.

“You’re late,” he observed, his voice calm but with an undercurrent of curiosity. “Unusual for you.”

“My apologies, Master Amancio,” Hemlock replied, trying to keep his voice steady. “I… overslept.”

Amancio’s eyes narrowed slightly, taking in Hemlock’s appearance. “Interesting,” he murmured. “You do not look well… are you alright?”

Amancio came closer, his steps almost floating, gliding, as he got closer. He brushed some of Hemlock’s white hair back, looking closer at him.

Hemlock nodded, swallowing hard. “I do not know… I do not feel normal. But I’m ready to begin our lesson. I want to see how the duality affects me…”

Amancio’s lips curved into a slight smile. “I’m rubbing off on you, I see. Like mentor, like apprentice. Very well. Let’s see how your condition affects your abilities today.” He gestured towards the center of the room, where a circle of runes was inscribed on the floor. “Begin with the basic summoning. Try summoning Seraphina, I haven’t seen her all morning.”

Hemlock took his position within the circle, feeling the familiar tingle of magic against his skin. He closed his eyes, focusing on the spell. Normally, the words would come easily, the magic flowing through him like a river. But today, it was different. His voice wavered, and the energy felt unstable, like trying to grasp smoke.

The room grew colder, the temperature plummeting as Hemlock struggled to maintain control. His ghostly side surged, fighting against the illness weakening his human half. The runes flickered, the light within them sputtering as if caught in a fierce wind.

Amancio watched intently, his expression inscrutable. “Interesting,” he repeated softly. “Push through it, Hemlock. Harness the instability. You will be okay.”

Hemlock gritted his teeth, sweat beading on his forehead despite the chill. He could feel the magic slipping from his grasp, his body trembling with the effort. But he refused to yield.

With a final, desperate surge of will, he channeled the energy, directing it towards the center of the circle.

No luck. No Seraphina. Not because she was hiding, Hemlock knew that. He just didn’t have the ability to summon as effectively as normal.

Hemlock fell to his knees, gasping for breath. The exertion had taken its toll, leaving him weak and disoriented. Amancio approached, his expression thoughtful.

“Remarkable,” he said quietly. “Your ghostly side amplifies your human frailty, yet also enhances your potential. We will continue to explore this.”

As Hemlock looked up at his mentor, he saw not disappointment, but intrigue.

Amancio’s eyes gleamed with a mix of curiosity and pride. Despite the pain and the struggle, Hemlock felt a flicker of hope. He had faced the shadows within and emerged, if not victorious, then at least unbroken. And in the echoes of his struggle, he found the strength to continue.

“Are you sure you want to continue?” Amancio asked, “As enticing as this research is… I do want you safe.”

“No, I want to continue.” Hemlock insisted.

Amancio helped Hemlock to his feet, his grip firm but not unkind. Hemlock's legs felt like jelly, and his vision was still a bit fuzzy, but he wanted to know what he was dealing with, or could deal with until something changed, until the scales tipped one way or the other.

"I'm ready for the next exercise, Master Amancio," Hemlock said, his voice steady despite the trembling of his body.

Amancio raised an eyebrow. "You are eager, I'll give you that. But eagerness can lead to recklessness."

Hemlock nodded, a slight flush creeping into his already pale cheeks. "I need to know how my ghost side interacts with my human side, especially under these conditions. I have to understand it if I’m ever going to control it, control anything for that matter."

Amancio studied him for a moment before nodding. "Very well. We’ll proceed. Let's move on to flight control."

Hemlock took a deep breath, steadying himself. He focused on the sensation of weightlessness, the feeling of his ghostly side asserting itself. Slowly, he began to lift off the ground, his form shimmering slightly as the air around him grew colder.

At first, it was smooth. Hemlock hovered a few feet above the ground, his movements controlled. But then, a sharp pain twisted in his stomach, and he winced. The room spun, and he struggled to maintain his altitude. He clenched his jaw, pushing through the discomfort, but it was clear he was struggling.

“Does he look pale to you?” Seraphina appeared beside Amancio, voice cut through the air, soft yet filled with concern. She had entered the study silently, her presence almost as ghostly as Hemlock’s abilities. Her eyes, a striking mix of green and gold, were fixed on Hemlock. “i mean… paler than even a half ghost boy would be?”

“He’s ill my dear,” Amancio told her. “but he is devoted to trying to balance his abilities while his illness of the human side wars with the spectral side of him.”

“He’s much like you,” Seraphina said, “Entirely too stubborn.”

Amancio glanced at her briefly before returning his gaze to Hemlock. “Indeed. He’s too stubborn for his own good. More so than myself.”

Amancio and Seraphina’s playful banter was interrupted by the dull thud of Hemlock hitting the floor. The half-ghost, half-human boy knelt on the ground, his arm wrapped tightly around his stomach, his face contorted in pain.

“Oh, ‘lock…” Seraphina said softly, her voice filled with a tender concern. She knelt beside him, her presence a calming force. “What’s wrong?”

Hemlock’s vision swam, the room around him blurring into indistinct shapes. He swallowed hard, trying to keep the bile from rising in his throat. Bile and… god he wasn’t sure if something else would come up too.

“My stomach really… really doesn’t… doesn’t feel good…” Hemlock struggled to say, Seraphina observed the small dry heaves that broke up his speech, which made her stand swiftly and grab the trash bin by Amancio’s desk that typically was there for show and nothing else.

She placed it near Hemlock.

“What’s going on?” Amancio questioned, “Did you utilize too much?”

“No… my stomach… all of a sudden… I feel like I might be…” He didn’t finish the sentence as he lurched forward, retching violently, thankful Seraphina had some sense, or intuition, or whatever made her grab the bin. The nausea that had been a mere whisper now roared, his body rebelling against his determination.

Seraphina went to say something, but was cut short as Hemlock convulsed again, the sound of his retching tearing through the room. She placed a hand on his back, offering what comfort she could. “Oh, Hemlock…”

Hemlock gasped for breath, his body trembling. “I can’t stop now,” he muttered, his voice raw with pain. “I need to understand this. How my duality affects something as mundane as illness. I have to know.”

Amancio stepped forward, his expression stern but not unkind. “You are pushing yourself to the brink, Hemlock. There is a limit to what even you can endure.”

“I don’t care,” Hemlock replied, his voice a stubborn rasp. “I need to do.”

“You already got good information,” Seraphina said softly, her hand still resting on his back. “But you can’t destroy yourself in the process.”

Hemlock shook his head, the motion making him dizzy. “I have to try. Please, let me continue.”

Amancio sighed, a deep, resigned sound. “Very well. But we will monitor you closely. The moment it becomes too much, you will stop. Is that clear?”

Hemlock nodded, his resolve unwavering despite his weakened state. “Yes.”

“Then let us proceed,” Amancio said, his voice carrying a weight of both authority and concern. “Begin with flight control again. Focus on maintaining your altitude despite the discomfort.”

Hemlock took a deep breath, steadying himself. He closed his eyes, feeling the familiar pull of his ghostly side. Slowly, he lifted off the ground, his body shimmering as it became less solid. The air around him grew colder, and for a moment, he felt a surge of triumph.

But then, the pain in his stomach twisted again, sharp and unrelenting. He convulsed mid-air, his concentration breaking as he retched, the sound echoing through the room. His form wavered, becoming more ghost than human, before he collapsed to the ground once more.

Seraphina was beside him in an instant, her eyes filled with a mix of frustration and concern. “Hemlock, you can’t keep doing this to yourself.”

“I have to,” Hemlock whispered, his voice barely audible. “I need to know.”

Amancio knelt beside him, his expression grave. “Your determination is admirable, Hemlock. But there is a difference between pushing your limits and destroying yourself.”

Hemlock looked up at him, his vision swimming with unshed tears. “I just want to be strong. To control this.”

“And you will,” Amancio said firmly. “But not like this. You need to rest and heal. Only then can you truly master your abilities.”

Seraphina's expression softened, and she gently placed a hand on Hemlock's shoulder. “Come now, Hemlock. Let's get you to rest for a few moments. Just a short break, and then you can return to training.”

Hemlock looked between them, his stubbornness warring with the undeniable exhaustion he felt. Finally, he nodded, allowing Seraphina to help him up.

“Alright,” he said, his voice a reluctant murmur. “Just for a little while.”

They guided him back to his room, Seraphina’s presence a comforting balm to his frayed nerves. As she helped him settle into bed, she brushed a stray lock of hair from his forehead.

“I will offer you a deal,” Seraphina said, “Calypso is one of my students. Her lessons are never long… rest through hers and once her lesson is complete, I will come get you, does that sound fair? Besides, even if you don’t think you need a break, surely Amancio would enjoy one for himself, you know him.”

“Fine…” Hemlock nodded slowly.

“Rest now,” Seraphina said softly. “We’ll resume when you’re ready.”

Hemlock nodded, his eyes already drooping. The bed felt comforting beneath him, making his body ease up even slightly on how terrible he felt. And despite his determination to stay awake, sleep claimed him swiftly.

Seraphina returned to the study, where Amancio was waiting. His expression was thoughtful, his eyes dark with concern.

“He’s determined to destroy himself,” Amancio said, his voice a low rumble, “He is more reckless than most fledglings…”

“He’s not trying to destroy himself,” Seraphina replied, her tone gentle but firm. “He’s desperate to prove himself. To you, especially.”

Amancio raised an eyebrow. “To me?”

Seraphina nodded. “I sensed it in his thoughts and feelings. He’s driven by a need to make us proud. But more than anything, he’s afraid of disappointing you.”

Amancio’s eyes softened, a rare vulnerability showing through his usual stoic demeanor. “I didn’t realize… I’ve always pushed him hard, but I never thought he’d push himself to this extent.”

“That’s why you need to talk to him,” Seraphina said, her gaze unwavering. “He respects you more than anyone. My words won’t reach him in the same way yours will.”

Amancio sighed, a weight settling on his shoulders. “Very well. I will speak with him.”

They returned to Hemlock’s room, finding him asleep, his face pale and drawn.

Seraphina sat beside him, her touch gentle as she stroked back his white hair, pushing it off Hemlock’s face. Her fingers brushed over his head, almost like petting a puppy. It didn’t wake him, in fact Amancio observed that it made Hemlock gradually less tense. Even the way Seraphina rubbed his arm, every kind and affectionate touch.

Amancio pulled a chair close, his expression pensive as he watched the young wraithling.

“He’s so fragile,” Seraphina murmured, her eyes filled with a maternal warmth. “And yet, so strong. He just needs guidance.”

Amancio nodded, his gaze never leaving Hemlock. “He’s remarkable. And stubborn. Much like myself.”

“He’s just a kid, Amancio,” Seraphina’s voice was regretful. “Well, he’s young. Twenty three years as a human… how could that just be stolen like this?”

“It is much like us, dear Sera,” Amancio said softly, “You were once but a girl, a young woman really. A nurse, weren’t you? During the war…”

“I was, indeed,” Seraphina said softly, “And you were but a boy not unlike Hemlock… an author, a poet, a soldier…”

“And yet, there was no other option for us except a cease of existence,” Amancio said, “Much like him, much like many of us.”

For a while, they sat in silence, the room filled with the soft sounds of Hemlock’s breathing. Eventually, Hemlock stirred, his eyes fluttering open. He blinked up at them, disoriented and still feeling the residual nausea.

As he processed Seraphina and Amancio, he inhaled sharply, panicked.

Seraphina smiled warmly, brushing a hand over his hair again, “How are you feeling, young wraithling?”

“A bit better,” Hemlock lied, trying to sit up. But as he did, another wave of nausea hit him, he groaned softly, wrapping an arm around his stomach.

“You poor dear…” Seraphina said, her voice filled with concern. “Let’s see…”

She stood, getting off the bed from where she sat and looking around the room. No bins, but she did find an empty vase on the windowsill.

“Glad neither of you are big fans of floral arrangements,” she said, laughing lightly.

She quickly brought it over, just in time as Hemlock retched dryly. She sat next to him, keeping it steady. She watched him, listened. Her senses were heightened snd the way she could hear Hemlock’s stomach gurgle and writhe made her cast a sympathetic look toward him and a concerned one toward Amancio, though she said nothing.

She heard it then, the way acid came up his poor throat, she tightened her hold on the vase and held him by a shoulder just as he retched again, this time bringing up not only the remnants of his stomach contents but also a strange, translucent substance that shimmered eerily in the dim light.

Amancio’s eyes widened slightly, his curiosity piqued, moving the chair closer without getting too close.

“Interesting,” he murmured. “Your dual nature is purging both human and ectoplasmic matter.”

Hemlock wiped his mouth with a trembling hand, his eyes filled with a mix of embarrassment and discomfort. “I didn’t mean to fall asleep. I didn’t mean to get sick. I’m sorry.”

Seraphina placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder. “It’s alright, Hemlock. You needed the rest. We’re more concerned about your well-being.”

“I’m sorry…” Hemlock said, and then mumbled something. Neither Amancio nor Seraphina caught it.

“What was that, wraithling?” Amancio asked softly.

“Gonna… gonna throw-“

Hemlock shook his head, his nerves made his stomach churn once more. He retched again, harder this time. Seraphina holding the vase steady for him. The ectoplasm mixed with the more familiar bile, splattering in the vase. One or the other or both got stuck in his throat.

He coughed, hard, but the hard coughing only made him practically projectile expel stomach acid and ectoplasm in a thick sludge that felt thicker and thicker each time.

“You’re alright,” Seraphina soothed, her touch gentle, rubbing his bad, “Just breathe through it. Amancio, grab some water…”

Hemlock retched again, harder. Seraphina felt his stomach pull in, his back shake, heard the thick substance splatter in the vase.

After a few more minutes, the sickness seemed to pass, leaving Hemlock weak and trembling and hyperventilating but no longer in immediate distress. Amancio watched him with an analytical gaze, his mind clearly working through the implications of Hemlock’s condition.

“Your body’s reaction is both fascinating and concerning,” Amancio said finally. “It appears your ghostly side is trying to cleanse itself in tandem with your human side. You will not be training for the rest of the evening but I will be closely monitoring your condition and notating it in your species file…”

Hemlock shook his head, “No… no… I want to keep training…”

“I do not factor in what you are asking for,” Amancio said, “You are too ill to continue and your condition is entirely precarious…”

“But I can’t quit,” Hemlock insisted, “Really I’m fine…”

A confused look crossed Seraphina’s face, shifting her gaze from Hemlock to the contents of the vase, then back to Hemlock and back to the vase again.

“That,” Seraphina said, tilting her head toward the vase, “Is definitely a symbol that you are, in fact, nowhere near as fine as you say.”

“But I am!” Hemlock tried to insist, “I promise. I don’t want…”

“You haven’t disappointed us, Hemlock,” Seraphina said firmly, cutting him off as she brushed a strand of hair from his forehead. “You’ve shown incredible strength and determination. But you must learn to listen to your body.”

Amancio nodded in agreement. “Pushing through pain and illness does not make you stronger. It’s knowing when to rest and when to push forward that will make you a true master of your abilities.”

Hemlock looked between them, his eyes filled with a mix of hope and uncertainty. “I understand. I’ll try to be more careful.”

Seraphina’s eyes softened with affection. “We’re here to help you, ‘lock. You don’t have to prove anything to us. We already see your potential and your strength.”

Amancio leaned forward, his gaze intense yet kind. “Your journey is not just about pushing limits but also about understanding them. We will help you find that balance.”

Hemlock took a deep breath, feeling a weight lift from his shoulders. “Thank you,” he said quietly. “I won’t let you down.”

Seraphina smiled warmly. “We know you won’t. Now, let’s get you more comfortable.”

As they helped him settle back into bed, Hemlock felt a sense of calm wash over him. Seraphina sat beside him, arm wrapped around him, letting him rest his head on her shoulder while she went back to running her hands through his sweaty hair. A simple vanishing charm made the vase disappear and someone conjured or grabbed another bin, setting it next to Hemlock’s bed. Amancio now sat with his records journal in his lap.

It was quiet, comfortable. And for once, Hemlock felt entirely safe in his environment.

[eaglesnick]

“The game is rigged to work for those who already have money and power.”  Elizabeth Warren

A few months ago, before the election, I wrote:

“A vote for Nigel Farage’s Reform Party is essentially a vote for business and the rich.” (13/06/24)

I pointed out that under Reform UK, the biggest tax breaks would go to big corporations and the already very wealthy.

Richard Tice, former leader of Reform UK is a multi-millionaire. Hedge-fund billionaire Paul Marshal and the Dubai based investment company Legrartum, founded by New Zealand billionaire Christopher Chandler who made his fortune in Russian gas, bankroll right-wing GB News, where Farage and Tice have their own shows.

Multi-millionaire Jeremy Hosking gave £2,578,000 to Reform UK coffers.  Another major donor to Reform is the ex-Bullingdon Club member George Farmer. An “ardent supporter of Donald Trump”, Farmer was CEO of the far-right platform Parler, and is married to Candice Owens, a woman who “promotes far-right ideologies”. In 2023 he joined the board of GB News.

According to Electoral Commission records Chris Harborne handed over £10 million to Brexit/Reform. He gained notoriety when his name appeared multiple times in the Panama Papers. These documents revealed:

 “…off-shore holdings of world political leaders, links to global scandals, and details of  hidden financial dealings of fraudsters, drug traffickers, billionaires, celebrities, sports stars and more”. (International Consortium of Investigative Journalists: 03/03/2016)

Reform UK is essentially funded by the rich.  They see Nigel Farage’s party as a means of furthering their own already substantial wealth. Only an idiot would believe these individuals are spending millions of their own money because they want to improve the lives of ordinary working people or because they want to “protect British values".

Farage makes great play with “protecting British values”:

“Nigel Farage signalled a return to right-wing shock tactics for his Reform UK party, as he used his first election interview to attack Muslims in the UK for “not sharing British values”. (Independent 26/05/24)

Strange then that Farage was willing to take money from a rich Muslim donor during the election campaign.

“Muslim millionaire gives major donation to Reform UK…The precise amount Zia Yusef has given to the party has not been disclosed but  Reform UK claims it is the biggest donation to their election campaign so far”  (BBC News: 19/06/24)

Stranger still for a man who promised “a much more muscular defence of our Christian heritage and our Christian Constitution”,  to appoint Yusef as Reform UK Party Chairman only a few days AFTER the election results.

What Reform UK is really about is protecting the wealthy. Talk of defending British values is just a smoke screen to garner votes, playing on peoples concerns about immigration to get into power. It should therefore come as no surprise that it has been revealed that Nigel Farage is the best paid politician at Westminster.

 We learned this week that Farage is earning ££98,000 a month, working for the right-wing GB News. In addition, Farage has received a £30,000 donation to pay for his trip to support Donald Trump during the US election campaign.

The total number of hours worked b Mr Farage for paid employment outside of Parliament is officially 32hrs a week. Clearly, he is more interested in lining his own pockets than in attending to his duties as an elected MP and looking after the interests of his constituents in Clacton.

If you really want to understand what Reform UK is really about then you cant beat the old adage, "follow the money".

[cmncisspnandmore]

I just need to tell you about this amazing little writer,@cordeliawhohung.

I stumbled across this account by total accident okay? Like 100% had no intention of reading the fanfictions she wrote for. I had only ever heard of Call Of Duty from my husbands late night gaming escapades. But yet, i took a chance, I googled "Simon Riley" and was like "oh okay, bet, military man who wears a skull mask. Lets give it a try," So i did.

I read her fanfiction series called Soft Spot, with basically ZERO context. I googled more in the hour it took me to read her work than ive ever googled in my life. But i was NOT dissapointed. Did i have to reread scenes to figure out who was talking because i was clueless on their names? yes. Did it discourage me one bit? no.

BECAUSE. this girls writing is something else. it captivates you, throws you right into being the main character which is EXACTLY what you're looking for when you read these things. Without fail Core had me hooked. So i did the thing that most anyone does, I left a little ask/message for her. Explaining how this piece of UNPAID, UNOWED work left me on the edge of my seat. How the wrods jumped off the page to try to become reality. Because thats what they did.

And this percious little bean, offered to message me about the characters, to help me understand the things i didnt. She not only eagerly, but kindly informed me of the beautiful characters of Call of Duty Modern Warefare 2, but she also showed me how beautiful her very soul is.

She became one of those people i wanted to talk to all the time. (I probably annoy her with how much i message her, and Core i am sorry, but i cant help it.) We started talking more regularly, and in the few weeks we have been talking, i've come to consider her one of my friends.

Although we dont get to talk a lot, due to her work, time differences and life just being hard. ANY time i see her username pop up in my notifications im thrilled.

I could go on for hours about her, i should. Because there are so many amaizng things i could say about her.

Her writing is next level, if we could all legally publish fanfiction without the whole legal rights thing, Core's story "Soft Spot" would be a best seller. I firmly believe that she would be NYC Best Selling Author her first year. Her way of writing hooks you from the first few words. I honestly get a little jealous of how well she writes, but she was quick to tell me that if we all wrote the same then the world would be boring. Which is true.

So to conclude this post. If you havent, check her out. send her an ask, and get to know the amazing person who runs @cordeliawhohung. You won't regret it.

Also be kind to your fanfiction writers, they do this without pay. For YOUR entertainment. Reblog, like, share, interact with them. They write 100+k fics because they love the same characters as you. They write the works that some people need, that they crave, all on their own time. Be appreciatve and understanding when they do upload and when they can't. They're humans too. Be kind to them. Dont demand things from them.

Core, i appreciate you. I care for you. I will agressively love you from hundreds of miles away. Take care of you, take whatever time you need. And NEVER apologize to anyone for feelings like you aren't doing enough. Because just being you, babes, thats enough.

[empresskylo]

HELLO!!!!

i just discovered ur acc today and have been FURIOUSLY stalking it for the last few hours reading over everything you've wrote. as you do. normal person activites.

I just wanted to say I APPRECIATE YOUR CONTENT SO MUCH!!!!

literally have been looking high and low for some cod fanfiction that is just Soft and Kind even in the nsfw 😭😭 bitches be writing Ghost in the most like violent sex scenes and im like bro has literally witnessed toxic behavior and violence towards women and just in general his whole life and ur telling me hes gonna be mean to his girl and non-con her duing sex??? no bros gonna be so soft and kind and so scared to overstep boundries 😭🙏 (furthermore it. stumps me how ppl consume that kind of media. i know what ppl may enjoy reading may not always be what they actually would want irl but it makes me cringe just reading sometimes i cant fathom)

ANYWAYS i digress i just wanna shout u out for writing some of the softest and sweetest fanfic out there on tumblr ive seen so far latched onto every word literally gnawing and rattling the bars of my enclosure.

i am such a sucker for the soft and sweet that anytime i see some non-con dark fanfic (most of the stuff i see on here) i do a little sigh. ur doing a service for the country tysm 😭🫶💗

thank you sm!!! i really appreciate you writing all this out to send to me! 🫶🥰 i cannot believe you love how i portray ghost, that is so kind and makes me so happy!!!!

it's hard to explain why i, personally, enjoy some dark romance/fanfics. everyone is different, but I just find exploring darker content in writing is a way I kind of cope with my own trauma. it's like taking the power back in a sense?? most of these kinds of fics are written by women, and it's just a safe space for me?!? idk how to explain it well but I just wanted to share why I sometimes enjoy some dark fics! but I do think the cod fics on here are overly saturated in that kind of content so I'm happy you find my work so satisfying 🥹

that being said, i totally agree with you on ghost having experienced so much trauma, i'd think he'd be so gentle in all aspects of a relationship. especially in the comics where he had witnessed so much violence towards women that he genuinely didn't want to emulate. i think he'd be very anxious about hurting his partner. there's also just something I love about the big bad burly man actually being such a softie. i want an overprotective ghost who just wants to shower his partner in love and maybe sometimes doesn't know how to fully express himself 🥹

[juliaynes]

Hi ! This blog is so cute omg !

May I ask if you have any headcanons about a Julia and Raj friendship? Sometime after Wayne and Julia start dating, Wayne suggests that Julia and Raj hang out and get to know each other. How do you think that would play out?

this is one of my favorite asks EVER.

they seem like such a dynamic duo to me… and i wrote a drabble to go with this ask because i’m obsessed. your honor they are FRIENDS!!!

“I cant believe Wayne actually got me to hang out with him.” Julia thought to herself. Out of all the people she met on total drama, she would have never expected to hang out with Raj outside the game. Raj felt similarly. It’s not that he hated Julia. He didn’t! She played the game well, and she surprisingly treats his best friend with alot of respect. But she’s so drastically different from him. Raj could care less what his social media feed looks like, but Julia’s life still seems to revolve around it.

“So!” Raj started. “What do you want to do? Or like- what do you like to do?”

“I don’t know. We’re both just doing this to make Wayne happy, so how about we waste our time doing something fun at least.” Julia didn’t look up from her phone while she spoke.

“Something fun… like an arcade!” Raj was delighted at the thought of going to an arcade. “If we go, we can surprise Bowie and Wayne with the prizes! And we’ll have lots of fun!”

“I guess we’re going to an arcade then.” She reflected. Julia wasn’t really the biggest fan of spaces like arcades. They were always too flashy and loud, and not the good kind of flashy and loud either.

They each put a few dollars onto an arcade card and almost immediately, Raj ran to the skee ball machines.

“Here. You play this one, and I’ll play this one! Then we compare scores and see who did better!”

“You’re on then.”

Raj and Julia stood at the skee ball machines for what seemed like hours. They bantered back and forth about anything and everything, while simultaneously beating eachother in skee ball. They almost got a few perfect games too, it’s bound to happen when you play skee ball for awhile.

“Y’know, I’m glad Wayne gave you a shot!” Raj said as he swiped his card for their last round.

“What does that even mean?” Julia was genuinely curious. She knew she was mean, but she also knew Wayne was interested in her from the get-go.

“Well, I didn’t think you were his type. Usually girls are the ones chasing him. He’s pretty popular, y’know?”

“I mean, I figured. He seems like the kind of guy to be popular in school. But what about him giving me a shot?”

“Julia, I mean this in the nicest way I can put it. You’re so like- hard core. I just didn’t think this would work as well as it did. I’m really glad Wayne made us hand out. You’re actually really fun!”

Julia couldn’t help but smile. It felt good to have friends. That’s something she never thought she would be saying, but spending time with Raj was some of the most fun she’s had in ages.

“Thanks, Raj. I appreciate that. Also I beat you.”

“You what? Oh, come on!” He jokingly nudged her. She did the same to him. “What can I say, you’re almost as competitive as me and Wayners!”

“Yep, and I plan on beating him and Bowie the next time we come here.”

“Ohhh! Is this gonna be a frequent thing?”

“Sure is. We should do the go-carts next time so I can lap you buttknuckles.”

“Oh, you’re so on, Julia.”

[bridgyrose]

🔔 Ruby on Neo

Ruby flicked the small, golden bell attached to the pink collar she held, almost entranced by the sound it made. She still wasnt sure where it came from or why the box seemed neatly placed in front of her doorstep, or who wrote the note in the envelope that was neatly tucked into the string that kept the box shut. But listening to the soft ring that came from it seemed to keep her mind calm, clearing out any of the thoughts and worries that she had as she rang it again. 

“What is the collar for?” Neo signed out. 

“I-I… I dont know.” Ruby sat the collar down back into its box as the ringing stopped. “I found it on our doorstep this morning. It wasnt addressed to anyone, and it came with a small note, but I havent read it yet. I think whoever left it here gave it to us by accident.” 

“You should read it. It might tell us who its supposed to go to.” 

Ruby looked at the message on the scroll that Neo had typed out just before she had taken the collar out of the box and started looking over it. Everything about this felt off, but she knew she couldnt argue with Neo and that she had a point. It was left at their doorstep, which meant that if it was meant for someone else, she’d have to read the note that came with it to figure that one out.  So, she did exactly that, picking up the envelope and carefully opening it to read the note inside. The paper seemed warm to the touch, almost as if it had been freshly printed even though it had been sitting in her kitchen for a few hours. She read over the note, a small  blush crossing her cheeks. 

For an unforgettable night and a change of pace in the bedroom. Place around your lover’s neck, ring the bell, and enjoy a night the two of you will never forget.*

Ruby sat the note down and watched Neo as she looked over the bell and felt the silk band of the collar. On closer look, it almost looked more like a choker than a collar, one that she wouldnt be opposed to wearing if she could get the bell off. But the longer she looked at the bell and listened to the small rings as it moved, she couldnt help but think about what the note had told her. “Slip it onto my lover, huh?” she asked quickly to herself. 

Neo finally looked up at Ruby and cocked her head to the side as she slowly signed to make sure Ruby could understand what she was asking. “Are you okay?” 

“I’m fine, but may I see that really quick?” Ruby asked. 

Neo nodded and handed over the collar. “Did the note tell you who it belonged to?” 

Ruby shook her head and walked behind Neo. “No, but I’d like to see how it looks on you.” Her hands shook as she moved the collar around Neo’s neck and locked the clasp in place, making sure it was tight enough to not move but still loose enough that it sat on her comfortably without giving problems to eat or breathe. Her fingers hesitated for a moment as she moved them closer to the bell, almost feeling a warmth come from it. Then, the bell finally rang as she flicked her finger against it. 

Ruby and Neo stayed still as the bell rang, listening to the soft chime until it stopped and listening to the silence around them for a few more seconds, waiting for something… anything to change. Ruby let out the breath she held, smiling softly with a sigh as she tried to undo the clasp of the collar. “Of course nothing would happen. Must be a prank that someone left for us, trying to see if we’d believe them.”

Neo sighed and picked her scroll back up. “What were you hoping for?” 

“I dont know, the note said to put it onto someone and flick the bell for an unforgettable night, but I’m sure someone just had a bit too much time on their hands.” Ruby frowned a bit as she tried to undo the clasp for the collar, unable to get it to open. “Just a harmless prank.” 

“Everything okay?” Neo signed with a wince as she felt Ruby tug the collar. 

“I think the clasp is stuck. I cant seem to get it to unlatch.” 

“We could cut it off.” 

Ruby shook her head and pulled her fingers away from the collar. “We could, but I’d rather not ruin this. It does look a bit cute, even if its not the right shade of pink for you.” She ran her fingers across the fabric of the collar and flicked the bell again. “And we could still use it tonight.” 

Neo blushed a bit and tugged at the collar a bit to adjust it. “I-I could keep it on,” 

Ruby kissed Neo’s cheek and playfully tugged at the collar to pull Neo close. “And if you’re a good kitten, I’ll make sure you get rewarded.” 

“For you, mistress.” 

“Good girl.” Ruby flicked the bell one more time and felt a chill run down her spine. Her cheeks felt like they heated up for a moment as she blushed. With a deep breath, she turned to look at Neo once more, swearing she saw a tail swishing behind her before going back into the kitchen. “But that’ll have to wait until after my meeting with Ozpin. You’ll be fine until I get back, right?” 

“Yes,” Neo signed, pocketing her scroll and grabbing Hush. “I’m meeting up with Roman today for lunch.” 

“Please promise you wont steal anything.” 

Neo pouted. “Fine.” 

Ruby smiled and kissed her as she made her way to the door. “Good.”

[emmacreatures]

A HEAVY START

OKAY. SO. Despite me and Nina literally made this ship earlier today, my brain did a BRRRR and went bonkers since I'm just extremely inspired and so happy to have nina in my life. This story starts off very gently, but well. Warning, it will take a big turn.

I cant tell yet how canon things will be, since we just made them, so I always need some experimenting and such! So IF I ANNOUNCE NEW SHIT, dont be surprised if it changes slightly through time, but despite all I'm nervous yet excited to hear what you guys think aaaa i literally wrote this in like.. 3 hours hoppla ENJOY! Featuring two new characters, called with their LAST NAMES!!! Muller and curran! __________

Everyone was just doing their thing at Bridgehead. Muller had been told to keep track of most developing recom bodies, as he was specialized in genetics. Though it didnt stop the man to go through more since he was one of tbe more specialized all 'inclusive' scientists at the RDA. His looks may seem innocent, but the man's mind was able to do more than just work on one part of their whole operation. He used to work beautifully along Grace, for they both had the beautiful passion for the Na'vi, and all living things.. But unlike Grace, Muller had a rather innocent look, so he at times got tossed around a bit, being asked to do various things which he did not mind.. In fact, he met alot of people because of that.. Something that at this day left a sour wound.

It was a big 'getting used to' for the man, when he was being brought back as a recom. He remembered waking up, as it felt like a dream at first.. He couldn't believe his own sight, and didnt remember anything when he started to slowly build up the fact he was a Na'vi now. He almost wanted to do tests on himself, as he was so mesmerized by the fact his DNA was now mixed with that of the native's... But the happiness was cut short, for his reality was slowly haunting him. It was like someone put a mental wall up in his brain. The more he scratched upon that wall, the more he rememberd from a past life. Memories they'd call it. But he started to feel it was becoming a slight nightmare. It wasnt his marvelous intelligence that bugged him.. It was the mere rather deeper emotions with attachments coming loose.

Through the months of being a Na'vi, he was asked a lot of things. He missed grace, for she kept a nice pace and control around the RDA, as they matched up well with energy, but he managed well on his own. His energy with the RDA didnt match so well.. So he tried to still be independant, and have his own corner to do what they asked of them. Originally he was put with the recom squad, to come along and explain them about pandora when they were developing to understand the na'vi ways especially, since like grace, he knew all about it. But slowly, Quaritch noticed the man becoming hesitant, as if something deeply put him on the breaks.. So for now, ardmore, after talking with quaritch about it, decided to keep the man at bay, and allow him to work in the labs for it seemed the best that way.

In those few months, alot of exciting things seemed to develop. Quaritch and his squad managed to catch one of the two natives of the Omatikayan.. In which another tried to come to rescue them, ending up with two. Something they could definitely use. One of them seemed rather difficult to handle, picking fights with specific recoms who originally lured them out.. But the other, was rather adjusted to the surroundings despite humans didnt seem to like the idea to have a native around. Since bridgehead was so extremely huge.. Muller hears about the 'rumors' of having a native on their side.. His eager and soft energy certainly wanted to have a chance if ever, to talk to him. He had so many questions.. Things he loved to ask. Despite he was a na'vi himself, he still had the biggest fascination to the natives.. Even if some of them, didnt like their association with them. He didnt know, or couldnt know, for he was just minding his business, gently checking half of the tubes full of the new recom units.. "All is stable." he softly said, smiling as he checked everything before heading back to his own lab. He got quite the space which he appreciated, but in the back of his head, he still felt a certain unknown.. Emptyness he couldnt quite figure just yet.

Being nearby his own lab, he wanted to hand out some data to some of the humans he had to work with, eventually seeing the native he heard about.. Out of pure fascination and admiration, he gently approached him.. He seemed to just look at some of the bigger screens. "Gosh.. Hi- I'm so sorry." Muller said in actual Na'vi.. Smiling. "You're a real.. Omatikayan.. Right. you must be Ka'am? If I'm not mistaken?" Muller gently asked, almost holding his hands together to see the rather warrior typed man turn to him. The beads in his mohawk like way of having his hair tied made a heavy noise.. Turning to him. For Ka'am looked at a rather excited scientist just from having a look at him. "you're from neytiri's family? i've heard rumors you were around but..-" Muller kept on talking in fluent na'vi, making Ka'am, who now had fully turned to the man instead of just his head.. Frown while responding in Na'vi. "i've not heard people speak about me" "OH nothing bad. I'm just, very honored to meet you. I see you" muller kept speaking in Na'vi, softly making the gesture from his head to show out of respect he saw Ka'am. Making the native tilt his head, as he looked down at the innocent looking scientist. Ka'am was taller than the man, and he seemed respectful.. Truly. "You are aware I can speak your language too right" Ka'am said serious, changing to english for Muller just had a soft "woah.." before harrumping. "I just felt like it was more fair to speak your language, since this is technically your territory." Muller said gently for, he invited Ka'am to his lab if he wanted, also because he just loved to see a full powerful native so closeby without wanting to kill him, which he would even understand.

Since Ka'am was quite looked at from the humans at this point, having a more respectful approach like Muller seemed better for his day. "I rather not be associated with them if you wouldnt mind by all means" Ka'am then said, for Muller frowned. "Associated with..?" "My family." "Oh- I- I'll note it down. I'm sorry if I-" Muller wanted to deeply apologize despite he certainly grew curiosity on why, but seeing Ka'am just make a gesture with his hand to say 'no need to continue' on his apologies.. For Muller understood right away. "So.. Were you looking for anything specific? I saw you try and figure your way, these things can be a hassle, even for me" Muller said kind, having noticed Ka'am was slightly searching for something. Ka'am could certainly tell the man was intelligent, on how he could read ka'am's intentions.. But since he really wasnt trying to get into Ka'am's business, he felt like Muller could actually help him. "I was.. Or well. do me a favor.. Can you look up old.. I believe they're recordings or field recordings. Quaritch wanted some, and since he's busy-" "So considerate- Let me actually see if I can get into it.. Since I'm just a .. Scientist. Not really like security or stuff like that" Muller said as he really was as innocent as he sounded. He wasn't JUST a scientist, but the man never bragged and was honest.. Sometimes he might even belittle himself on accident.. The man was never too kind though.. He knew where to stand his ground, but with Ka'am, he was just so fascinated, trying to help the best way. He was so impressed by the natives, and Ka'am was certainly a lovely example in his eyes. Perhaps even slightly scary to some, which Muller respected completely.

He gently put his card through the computer, seeing he in fact did have access. "Ah, there you go. I'll leave you to it" The man said as he gently sat down at a different desk near it, hearing Ka'am lean forward with his arms on the desk, watching the screens as the the braid from Ka'am, falling over his own shoulder to the front, made a noise that you could just hear was quite heavy. For some odd reason it made Muller smile. He loved having a native near, it just fueled his nerdy hype about the reason be became a scientist. The rather big smile almost on Muller's face took Ka'am's attention.. It wasnt like.. A fascination to his body or such, just the mere fact he was around. He turned to Muller once, for the man wanted to explain himself the second Ka'am did. "Must be heavy right? All those intricate beads.. with their possible traditions and stories" Muller said for Ka'am stood more straight instead of watching the screens. "It almost sounds you've never seen one like myself this close have you..?" The man said with a frown, for his voice was definitely lower than that of Muller. "Must be obvious right.. Indeed I havent. You caught me there. I apologize for it. Well, We've seen your kind from afar, let alone.. One that speaks to you, even in english, though I wouldnt mind to switch to Na'vi again" Muller said for Ka'am just nodded once.

"Quaritch isnt so fluent in Na'vi, so I might as well at times speak your language when its possible." Ka'am said rather serious, before Ka'am actually found something on the security footage after some searching. Something Quaritch most likely needed. "This. How can I obtain this" "Oh on a USB or? I can do that for you" Muller said as he stood up, putting it into the system that Ka'am was going through, putting the specific bit without checking what it was onto it. "That should do it.. Anything else you might need?" Muller was so helpful.. As at moments like this, infront of Ka'am for the first time, he almost forgot he was a na'vi himself. It was still something to get used to.

Ka'am noticed the genuine help.. But as the man helped him. He just never wanted to owe someone anything.. Being a loner and tricky man like he was. He just never wanted to have strings attached.. So having noticed the man's pure nerdy behavior which was what the humans called it.. Ka'am thought of a perfect solution..

"here. May this fill your fascination that you have for our kind" Ka'am said rather serious than thankful.. putting a very special carved bead onto the table they were standing at.. Making Muller who softly took it.. Just gasp. The bead was from hometree.. as Ka'am was slowly pushing himself further away from his original roots due to complications, it seemed like a win win So.. Now he was standing even.

"Are you serious... This is a bead from hometree. You get to make these when you- suceed within your tribe with a greater good" Muller said for Ka'am certainly was surprised but didnt show it. This man definitely knew alot. But hearing the man be so happy with it, he just nodded once in a 'just take it. and dont bother me about it' before he left, leaving Muller so excited about it.. "I gotta sample this in the lab later.." He whispered, before softly putting it into the pocket of his pants, slowly realizing that surprisingly along all this, he seemed to have access to much more than he originally thought with his RDA card that he always had with him.. He realized he might be able to dig into more stuff if he wanted to.. and as innocent as the man seemed, that dark empty hole he kept on feeling whether it was in his chest or head.. started munching more upon his curiosity. The mental wall was slowly breaking after months, and this sudden realization might grow worse

Muller was always rather fast with delivering what everyone asked. As mentioned before he was one of the best scientists around while people felt like he didnt live up to that title when it came to his looks.. But the man had brains and was a complex and well developed human who now was a na'vi. Brought back by the RDA. He knew something bad should've happened after a few weeks, but it seemed it was almost normal that everyone came back.. So, maybe his 'older' self.. would still be around, despite not having seen it yet

For he was done doing what he was asked to, muller's curiosity finally bit the bullet.. Sliding his card through the monitor to eventually start digging deeper into the system. After alot of trouble he ended up within the older files of their place before bridgehead was a thing.. Remembering a slight piece of it in the back of his mind. He rememberd selfridge.. A dirty asshole who never showed mercy, and he rememberd everyone he worked with before, including closer contacts he met along the way. Sighing as he went deeper and deeper into thr system, being alone in his lab, he frowned as he seemed to have found 'doctor muller. Confidental' files.. Without much hesitation he clicked on them, noticing a complex password was upon his files. Like said, he wasnt stupid. but now what.. What would he possibly have done as a password. It took a few tries even for him, and as a clone it was already complex enough.. But finally, he cracked it, seeing a lot of recordings of the first days..

He watched some of them, remembering it now, much clearer in his head. Being excited about plants, and hearing the avatar program Grace started was slowly becoming reality. Muller in the day was a young man, who was overly excited when he heard he was allowed to come to pandora to contribute with his intelligence. The second grace and him met, it was like a perfect match. Norm was fantastic too, but Muller ended up being more in the background, doing a lot of genetic research on the avatar bodies. Digging deeper into the DNA of things. The videos started off like a beautiful memory lane, even some videos where some squad members entered, asking how Muller was doing.. One in particular.. As the sudden connection was made in his brain. A happy little push, which made Muller smile for a second.. but as he went down and down.. Some videos, he couldnt remember. The aura was dark from the preview videos, but he did decide to click on one of the last ones, seeing right after most files were broken.

"This is day 799.. It seems Jake sully tried to convince them to leave. Everything is chaos right now. I dont know what he wants to do.. They're asking us to do horrible things. But selfridge and everyone else is doing the worst of things. They made hometree fall.. They killed it.. They put down grace's lab completely. At this rate I dont know what will happen. I dont know if I can do what they're asking of me.. Its not what I signed up for, but I dont want trouble either.".

Muller stopped the video there, closing it as he felt like it was getting worse.

"Day 805.. Just a few days apart, but its war.. I dont even blame the natives. They killed everything. This is not what I signed up for. The RDA, they're reckless.. I cant seem to see enough of whose behind this, but all we know is that most are prepared to fight, while me and the rest.. We want to leave the natives alone.. Unoptanium cannot be the reason we're doing this.. I.." Muller sighed so deeply on the video.. Seeing the human version of himself was odd too.. But he didnt know it could go worse from here..

"Day 806.." muller heard the audio.. He heard his own human version, sniffing from crying.. It was wrecking his stomach. "I dont know if this will ever reach the systems. The whole unit is collapsing.. I dont know if I will make it out alive myself, but you might ask yourselves while I'm here." The tone of his voice, was making Muller shiver, not touching the screens anymore as he let it go. "Curran.. Protected me.. From all chaos a few hours ago.. And now, here we are.. He passed away in my arms. I saw him die, right infront of me. And you know whats the worse part. I'm here, risking my life to do what you filfty bastards asked me to." Muller said as the anger he never showed popped up, his eyes full of tears on the video.

"If you are smart and if you ever see this, all of you, from the RDA.. You better not bring me back if I dont survive this.. As the chances of me surving alone here are small from the looks of it, but I have nothing to loose anymore, nothing to moarn over anymore as all you did was break me and...." Muller on the video couldnt even finish his sentence anymore, mentioning how the love of his life died in his arms was already too much.. "Unless you cold, horrendous people dare to pull me back. I never signed up for this when I was brought to pandora, for you all to murder them like.. A pest purely for your own good and money. I know I never seem threatening, and it might look like an easy game for you guys.. But i'm so.." Muller said on the video as the tears flew down his cheeks.. The heartache was unbearable.. "I dont want to be a part of this.. My life is nothing without him.." Muller said as he laughed once with the tears in his eyes. "Its almost funny.. To think the RDA, made me meet Curran in the first place which supposedly, was one of the best things that happened to me.. And now, you.. Make me end up erasing his mind because I was threatened to, right?" Muller said as his tears in video kept on flowing again. "If I didnt do it, you guys would.. so no win for me I suppose" Muller said defeated, swallowing. "you all dared me to take away that core memory.. so he can be a weapon for your new plan as this one failed.. Can you even sympathize with what I just described.. well. Of course not. Since you all have turned into killers, with no mercy. Having control over us all" Muller said as his crying made talking difficult. "Goodluck with that. I really hope, for you all, that you will not throw me back into this hellpit, as a recom" the man said almost threatening, hearing more of the building break apart.. As soon as he had sent off the DNA sample a second before.. "Its done.. Its sent off. So it might as well be done for me too." Muller said as he wanted to predict his own fate almost, before hearing more and more of the building collapse.. Muller watched his own human self, still try and get out of the mess, but before it completelt collapsed, the video broke and stopped recording.

Muller felt all his flashbacks occur in the back of his mind. Everything came back.. Every single detail that was captured in his DNA for the recom project. Popped up. It was taken before the huge accident he just watched, but seeing it all.. Was the last drop for him. He was frozen, he felt and heard the pain his human version already was going through. He rememberd Curran, of the most expertise Units he ever met.. He rememberd how they met, how they got along, how they fell in love.. and worst of all, now how he lost him. The realization hit him as well, that there was a chance Curran would be brought back as a recom, as the RDA asked him? as sickening as possible, to adjust his DNA sample with his memories, to have no hiccups. No emotional interuptions.. He rememberd it all now.. He rememberd the most difficult conversation he ever had in life.. How they were planning to make the recom program. But also knew about the relation Muller had to the incredible squad part that Curran was..

"We dont care what you think.. Emotional influences like that can make a soldier fall.. So whats the use if we would bring them back in such a state. Its misleading. If you wont take it out of his system Muller before sending it off to the recom system to have it imprinted on him, then we will. Its either you, or us"....

The sentences echoed in his brain.. Muller slowly stood up from the table after closing all tabs, making sure they were gone, before falling on his butt on the ground, holding himself as he was shivering.. Tears flew down his cheeks, as he couldnt make a noise, he was so frozen, as his emotions were all over. Muller held his own head after a while, unable to get a grip on himself for it all hit him too badly.. Worst part was that he knew about the conversation all too well, he remembered it now, but to have figured the two eventually died most likely since he could hear and see the building was about to collapse when Muller was still there.. Still trying to make it, in which Curran died for Muller to protect him.. Was something his heart couldnt bear.

The chances were there.. That Curran could eventually be part of the recom group, meaning if they'd ever come across each other, it would be a man.. That wouldnt have a single clue about Muller. Everything they experienced, build up.. Was gone, and out of all people, muller had to take it away from him..

Muller sat there for the longest of time, his own glasses had fallen off as he had sunken his own head into his arms that he held himself with at last.. Trying to give it a spot, but it was so hard to bear. Though as powerful as the man was, after a few hours, he managed to slowly push himself up, as his tail was wrapped around him.. Trying to breathe. He almost felt out of spite, the RDA brought him back.. It was definitely something Muller wanted to talk about eventually if he got himself a bit back together, but he just experienced his whole life in a few minutes. The emptyness now made sense.. for Curran wasnt in his life anymore, as so it seemed. He was just another scientist nessesairy for their things.. But Muller was not agreeing with it. He didnt dare to check the lists of Recoms anymore at this point.. He hadnt seen curran anywhere, so maybe.. just maybe it would give him a break for a bit. "Its.. Its late Muller.. You need to.. Sleep." He said to himself to calm down, despite it felt impossible.. He would eventually try and argue with the RDA, but for now, he needed some time for himself. He knew picking up work was the best he could do first thing tomorrow morning.. but this would definitely need time to process. The man was very smart, abd despite this was tough for him to do.. he knew trying to continue his 'new life' would've been the best to do.. so he tried that, despite his emotions at times like waves and flashbacks would sit him wrong.. Of course he didnt want to forget about curran.. He was everything that he could wish for.. But it was tough to hear whatbhappened.. but that wouldnt stop the man from working and possibly doing things he did want to do.. whats the worst that could happen now?...

[moonjxsung]

STAR MY BELOVED 💞💗💓🩷

okay basically i just need to vent a little and you’re actually the loml so who better to vent to than you🤭

okay but basically i’m so fucking stressed cause i’m leaving for korea on thursday and i have so much to do and i feel like i don’t have enough time? also i’m just so fucking scared and just feeling very meh rn. i’m gonna be flying alone and just so petrified of something going wrong, or me forgetting something important or just that something awful is gonna happen. and also just really feeling weird and lonely and just idk how to explain in but i’m just feeling EVERYTHING so deeply right now and i actually hate it so much. i just don’t know what to do with myself and i’m just struggling with every simple thing right now which feels pathetic cause why am i struggling basic stuff like eating and working and just things that should be simple? and easy?

i don’t know if any of this makes sense and also i’m sorry for like spamming you with this but just needed to get it out and you just feel so easy to open up to and so comforting so yeah🫶

BUT I LOVE YOU AND I HOPE YOU’RE DOING WELL! ALSO YOU’RE SEEING SKZ? THE HAN JISUNG? UGH I LOVE THAT FOR YOU AND YOU DESERVE IT SO SO MUCH MWAH👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

HI MY BABY I MISSED YOU HOW ARE THINGS 💞💞💞💞💞☹️🫶🫶💞🫶 you’re going to KOREA !!!! That’s so fucking exciting RAHHHH WE ALL CHEERED but I still totally understand being scared of flying alone !!! The first time I flew alone was for a business trip for my work across the country and I was literally PETRIFIED. The thing that worked best for me was to write down a little itinerary for myself in my phone notes (when to check in, my gate info, what time I boarded/landed, all my layover info, even what snacks I wanted to buy and how long I had between connecting flights!!) I also wrote little words of comfort for my future self just reminding myself to take a deep breath and drink water or listen to music and to stay CALM. And every time I started to get nervous I just read little notes from myself and it helped a LOT. Also portable chargers!!! Are a lifesaver!! My phone was almost dead by the time I landed (it was literally like 15 hours of flying) but my portable charger literally saved my life so I could still call an Uber to my hotel otherwise idk what I would’ve done. Don’t feel so much pressure to do everything in one day! Take it day by day and get a small few things done each day, maybe write down how you’re feeling or what you still have to finish and I promise it’ll be so much easier by the time your trip comes around. It’s also so important to just romanticize the whole trip so that it feels more exciting, I was crying when I had to take this business trip and I literally searched for every excuse to get out of it but when I got there I had a giant hotel suite to myself and I ordered chocolate chip pancakes from this little diner across the street and I ate so much food and watched shitty movies alone in my room and danced to Lorde music and it was MAGICAL. Doing things alone can be so scary but really putting yourself in the moment and allowing yourself to FEEL and just make the most of little things like pancakes or bad movies can be so so healing. I hope you have so many special little moments on your trip there and even MORE special moments in Korea!!!! What area are you traveling to & do you have anything fun planned?? I love you bby, don’t stress I am here for you alwayssss!! Also feel free to spam my inbox on the day you’re flying if it helps I will be manifesting a fun & safe trip for you my angel YOU GOT THIS 🫶🫶🧘‍♀️👼💘💞

ALSO YES I AM SEEING SKZ AND HANJI AGAIN IM SO FUCKING EXCITED I PROMISE I WILL TELL U ALL ABOUT IT ILY ILY I STILL CANT BELIEVE IT

[underratedandoverit]

isn't that mine?

~1,3k words orangekip (orange cassidy/kip sabian)

ffffffluff. had brain worms early in the morning after sleeping for couple of hours like shit so i wrote down an idea to return to later. so here we are. there really isnt much else to this, they are just cute and im in a terrible brain rot of having to have them smooch so trying to better myself by writing them smooching lol. the only way to improve or whatever i did not really proofread or edit this beyond a spell check, sorry about that. i cant focus but i want this up as i promised cutes so goddamn cutes is what we are gonna get!

@midnightpretenders0 @stormbornpirate

on ao3

-----------------

Leaning back on his chair Kip sighed, spinning the empty energy drink can in his hands. The session had gone on much longer than he anticipated and they were still going strong, although the games were getting pretty intense. He was honestly getting pretty beat, but the boys insisted on keeping on going as this was one of the rare times they had time to game with the whole gang together, so even Kip wasn’t allowed to dip out at a moment like this.

“Okay, just… Gimme a few, I’ll be right back for the next one,” Kip motioned towards the camera with the empty can before pulling off his headphones, standing up from his chair. He could see the stream chat moving, most people telling him to take a short breather – last round had been really intense, they had been so close to victory it had gotten almost everyone’s skin as they had lost it at the very last moment.

Exiting the office, Kip walked into the kitchen, stopping by the fridge to observe his choice of energy drinks. He was running low, he would have to restock the next time they headed out for groceries. Picking two cans in his hands, just in case tonight was going to go long, Kip headed back to the hallway, stopping by the living room doorway as he heard sounds coming from inside the room.

Peeking in, he spotted a familiar blond sitting on the couch, fiddling around on his phone while playing something that looked surprisingly quite familiar on the television screen. It didn’t take Kip two glances to recognize his own stream layout, making him chuckle out loud as he walked into the room, making Cassidy jump a little as he shot a look towards Kip over the back of the couch.

“My own little supporter,” Kip hummed as he leaned over the back of the couch, pressing a little kiss into Cassidy’s hair. The blond just shrugged him off, eyes returning to his phone. “You play terribly, by the way.”

“I love you too, Clementine.” Kip rolled his eyes at him, but his words carried enough sincerity for Cassidy to believe him. Before Kip walked back out though, he glanced the man over once more, slightly squinting at him.

“…Are you wearing my hoodie?”

Cassidy barely shrugged, eyes still glued on his phone. “Maybe.”

Walking around the couch to stand in front of him, Kip lowered the drink cans from his hands to the coffee table, arms crossing over his chest. “Maybe? That’s definitely my hoodie.”

With an almost overly dramatic sigh Cassidy lowered the phone from his hands, leaning a bit forward as he finally looked straight up at Kip, tilting his head at him for an even more dramatic effect. “Yeah? Well maybe if someone wasn’t too busy gaming and maybe if someone didn’t make their boyfriend watch and listen to them only through a Twitch stream all day, that said boyfriend didn’t have to wear their clothes to not be cold.”

“Oh, it’s my fault now, is it?”

“Yeah,” Cassidy shrugged again, slowly backing away from the defensive position he had been mere seconds ago just now, as he relaxed a little bit more on the couch again. “It sure is.”

Kip leaned down and closer to him, eyes narrowing even more as he was trying to call Cassidy’s bluff on his statement. “Really? My fault?”

“If you weren’t so busy all the time I wouldn’t need to do this.”

Kip could almost see the teasing smirk tucking in the corners of Cassidy’s lips, the blond clearly knowing he was getting under his skin. Kip wasn’t going to let him have this win though, hands grabbing him by the shoulders as he pushed Cassidy back against the couch, easily placing himself down on his lap to pin him down underneath him.

“My fault?” he asked once more, almost as a clarification, watching Cassidy just lazily nod his head, but the faint shade of blush on his cheek was something he couldn’t hide from Kip. “Yeah, you--”

Kip didn’t let him finish as he leaned closer, taking the rest of the words out of his mouth with a kiss. This was obviously what Cassidy had wanted since the beginning, they were aware of that, but that didn’t mean Kip was going to let him off easy. As Cassidy’s arms wrapped around his waist to pull him closer, Kip’s hands crept under the hoodie, fingertips tracing his toned midsection through the canvas of the t-shirt over it, getting what he wanted out of it as he could hear a small moan escape from Cassidy.

With a satisfied smirk Kip pulled away instead of following up with a deeper kiss, leaving Cassidy just staring back at him. Kip tapped his fingers under the hoodie against his abs, humming quietly to himself as he scanned Cassidy’s face, the range of emotions from expecting to almost humorously disappointed flashing across it in a matter of seconds, clearly upset that he didn’t get the kiss he wanted out of this interaction.

“You really think you were gonna get more than that?”

It was Cassidy’s turn to narrow his eyes at him, but Kip just continued to smile a little, clearly satisfied with his handiwork. “Bold of you to assume I was going to reward you for all of this.”

He leaned closer, easily dodging an attempt for another kiss from Cassidy as Kip pressed a quick peck on his cheek instead before reaching his ear. “But… I could see what I can do if you take it off,” he whispered, a clear smile in his voice as his hands wrapped around Cassidy, his body pressing against his as his hands tucked the back of the hoodie a little bit from the inside.

There was a slight bit of clear hesitation from Cassidy’s side at the proposal, Kip being fairly sure that it wasn’t the offer itself but the fact that they were so entwined with one another right there, clearly in a comfortable position just being held in each other's arms. Kip knew where he wanted to take this though, taking the initiative as he traced a small set of kisses from Cassidy’s cheek back to his lips, stopping just short of them to the corner of his mouth though, just leaving him to take the last step in case he was craving for some more.

Kip had to admit though, as whiny as he was about it, he didn’t mind Cassidy wearing his hoodie, actually. It was definitely more of an opportunity for him to get him in this position than anything else, and quite frankly he found Cassidy wearing his clothes rather endearing. Not that he was going to say it out loud, and Kip was definitely happy with the direction all this was going, but he was absolutely being more dramatic about it than he needed to be. Then again, so was Cassidy, clearly, since they had gotten themselves in this position.

Cassidy wiggled under him slightly, making Kip back away a bit as he watched the blond struggle to remove the hoodie with the little space he had. Kip chuckled at him, hands reaching over his head gently, carefully pulling the hoodie by the neck to help him take it off.

As soon as Cassidy was free of the hoodie and the garment left Kip’s hands to be dropped to the couch next to them, Cassidy’s hands tangled up in the brightly colored hair of the Brit, pulling him into the passionate kiss that he was craving, that he had been made to wait for the last few absolutely excruciating moments that Kip had tried to deny from him.

[stinkrascal]

there was that time a few weeks ago where everyone on my dashboard was reblogging posts that were like “maybe you’d have some friends if you weren’t so fucking mean. the reason you don’t have any friends is because you’re just an asshole” and like yea to an extent i believe that is something that can happen but i think it’s really reductionist to claim that’s the only reason people don’t have friends in the year 2022 two years after a global pandemic forced millions of people inside lest they risk the safety of their health is because theyre mean, and this isnt even taking into consideration that disabled/chronically ill people who are homebound existed before covid did. the internet has made theoretically connecting with others and with communities a lot easier but with that its also killed our offline communities, nobody just goes outside and talks to their neighbors anymore, i mean i sure as hell dont, do any of you? most people in america live paycheck to paycheck, so they cant afford to go out to places where theyd meet new people and even if they could, most of them are working so many hours that they dont have the energy to go somewhere after work, and that limits their viable pool of friendships to their coworkers, who are stuck in the same position as they are. im not saying that post is wrong or even indicative of anything more important than, like, what op was feeling at the time that they wrote it, im just saying in a broader sense theres more to why our generation of people is as lonely as it is, so it just kinda annoys me to see the idea reinforced that it is your fault alone if you are friendless whenever there are so many systemic things working against your pursuit to have and maintain quality friendships. what i am trying to say is that capitalism ruins everything