#i could ramble about dog facts 24/7

[littlegalerion]

Listen...I have a young niece in the house every other day, and it's her favorite show. So naturally the show hooked it's claws into my husband and I, and yeah it's as good as people said.

Instead of more Elder Scrolls Art, take some Bluey art I guess, of my husband and I as dogs.

Both German Shepherds, as it just makes sense, given our plans for the Homestead, plus my husband's family are retired, reputable German Shepherd breeders.

⚠️ "Panda" or "Piebald" German Shepherds should NOT be bred! ⚠️

I am a "Panda" German Shepherd due to DARK HUMOR ALONE, as I have quite a few medical issues and dogs bred out of standard, like a "Panda" Shepherd, are more at risk of medical issues.

My husband is a standard Black and Tan, American work line German Shepherd Dog.

[kyouka-supremacy]

(˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶)

[c0ffeeboy]

cw: agressive fluff

"hey, are you really this happy 24/7?" he scowls at me. "are you this grumpy 24/7?" i ask in return, pinching his cheeks. "yeah, but you already knew that." he says, slapping my hands away. "yeah, yeah, crabby face." i blow a raspberry at him.

"oi, look at my notes. i made them extra pretty because you were dozing off. figured you'd need them later." i push the wire-bound notebook towards him, flipping it open to the dog eared pages of today's class. he takes it from my hands, our fingers slightly brushing and i pull away too quick. "oh, thanks. i'll click pictures so that you can study later." he replies, pulling his phone out. "its okay! you can take it if you'd like. it's a pity i never study at home." i try to wink, but i fail and it looks uncool as heck.

"yeah, yeah. you never study. and you still manage to come out among the top 5 of the class during tests." he retorts. "oh well, i just write what i remember from class. if its correct it helps me score more!" i smile at him. he snaps my notebook shut and puts it in his bag. "hey, since you lent me the notebook, let me buy you something." "oh? what do you want to buy me?" i chuckle, not expecting a proper answer.

"i don't know, you want to get dinner or something?" he asks, nonchalantly. "you. want to get dinner. with me." i blink at him. "who are you and what have you done to my best friend?" i poke his cheek. "hey, let me be nice to you while it lasts. you want to get dinner or no?" he grabs my hand, not letting it go. "you keep doing these favours for me. let me do something for you too. i know i'm not that nice but, hey, you can let me try. please." he blushes, his voice shakier than normal. i realise that my face has turned beet red too and my heart is racing.

"i mean, its fine really, you don't have to do it because you feel obligated! i don't even need the notebook for a few days now-" "do you want to get dinner? yes or no? its a simple question." he cuts me off, his beautiful eyes staring right into my soul. "i... uhm, yeah. yeah. sure." i stammer out a reply. "see, that wasn't so bad." he lets go of my hand and gets up from his chair.

"where do you want to go?" he stretches, his hoodie riding up and showing a perfect strip of skin. i turn my face away before he realises that i'm gawking. "i don't know, i'm feeling indecisive. what do you want to eat?" i ask, trying to not yell out in happiness and utter disbelief at the fact that i'm getting dinner with my crush at his request. maybe all those times of being annoying and initiating contact really paid off.

he takes my hand and pulls me up from my chair, tugging me along with him outside of the classroom. "there's this new place near my dorm, i went there a week ago and its good. they do fried chicken, japanese food, and desserts. you said you'd been craving karaage and gyoza so maybe we could get those." he doesn't realise it, but i'm willing to eat out of a trashcan if it means i get to be with him. "yeah, sounds great." i smile at him, my heart full of love for this grumpy idiot.

🫀(blackbird)

ps: please excuse any and all mistakes augh! i'm okay now! i'm sorry if this one seems rambly, i didn't put much thought into it. i've been consuming too much romance anime lately and i need a break. i've been reading the mortal instruments too, and i looove magnus bane sooo much. the tv show did his hair dirty. if you ever post snippets if your book, do let me know! :)

excuse me as i go ugly sob from being so incredibly single

AHHHHHHH

that was so cute, like wtf no mistakes at all, i will think about this all week. also YES MORTAL INSTRUMENTS.

and i shall, once i actually start writing-

[soulscursed]

(incomplete drabble that started from wanting to dive into some klint and barok headcanons, and ended up with incoherent rambling)

things that klint van zieks was...

... barok's major role model from an early age. though long and intricate (and hailing from beyond the Great British empire, perhaps even from the then-hostile united provinces of the Netherlands), all but the previous generation of van zieks ancestry has much bearing on its two modern sons. the late master of the van zieks estate withered away quickly after his wife died during her second childbirth; grief swallowed him whole and, along with him, all devotion to his first son and any that he might have given to his second.

barok was much too young to feel the absence of their late father. old enough to walk and to string together little sentences... 'klint! want klint! klint!' was a reported favourite, cried and shouted all through the hours of the day, much to the dismay of the maids). he was well-taught enough to mind instructions given by his older brother to behave, and just old enough to begin to retain his newest memories, but also to play make believe. he was proud to demonstrate a combination of all these skills in the corner of klint's study which he often haunted for hours on end: poorly obscured behind a pillar, his tailored cloak pulled over his lower face, brows knit into a baleful glare.

( 'what is that?' klint had teased once, tousling the hair that barok had taken such care in oiling back. the death of their father was still fresh then, the wound in his heart nowhere near ready to begin to mend. 'what are you supposed to be?'

( 'lord van zieks!' barok had snapped. no amount of covering his face would hide his reddening ears, at least not with his complexion. 'it's father!'

( and klint's heart had sunk. so far gone was their departed father that barok would never remember him as anything other than a ghost — a stranger in their own home. )

aka the tale of klint van zieks' parentification... i think the amount that barok talks about his brother? it was a horrible murder, but van zieks talks like he's never stopped mourning. of course one never does, but this feels like a 24/7 self-torment thing

i think their lives were so intertwined because of their dynamic. klint wanting to give barok the world, knowing what he himself had lost and overcompensating generously with his darling brother. but uhhhh at some point klint toes the line of "all i do is all for my brother" and begins to tiptoe into justification for other things. like murder.

i think their rship is particularly codependent in nature. vampiric, almost. even if mutually so. and i think klint does not shoulder the blame for all that — he had his many burdens throughout life. being nobility, they not only restrained 99% of their affections, but also their family affairs, to the privacy of their home. there was no counter to balance out the developing co-dependency.

i believe this co-dependency follows barok post-Professor trial. he talks about how he felt that the existence of the Reaper sometimes brings him a bizarre reassurance — as if it's klint doing justice where he could not. this goes against van zieks' morals; he operates within the constraint of the law, flawed as it is, and does what he can to pursue truth within it. because pursuing justice does not involve going and killing people you deem guilty. he's actively investigating the Reaper himself to put a stop to it, even as he bears the title for the sake of London's safety, but the fact that he sometimes takes comfort in it... crazy. talk of a man who idolised his brother far too blindly to think "maybe my brother is the Professor" more than just Once, despite the fact they keep hunting dogs... and klint was gone often during that time... and he was acting bizarrely...

barok may have formed this relationship one-sidedly with stronghart, who filled the role (however vaguely) of a guardian after the Professor trial. explains as well why barok would have been blind to his ... general demeanour.

[drev-the-procrastinator]

20 Questions for Fic Writers -tag game

I got tagged by @zyrafowe-sny, thank you for the tag! This was fun! I wrote the answers at like 5 am sorry if they're rambly and unhinged haha.

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

13, but really 7, because all but one of them are Finnish and English language versions of the same stories sjdfnasdfj

WWAIT 14! one of them is anonymous jhfashdfj almost forgot about that one

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

24 448

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Well,,, the fandoms I’ve published fic for are Hetalia (kringelis krongelis i know) and The Owl House, but when you add WIPs there’s also the Mandalorian, Noragami, and BNHA, and there USED to be HTTYD and GNG as well. Yeah the last one is the old anime where dogs fight bears. What can I say it’s really popular in Finland, Hopeanuoli 4ever

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

hands, grasping (the one TOH fic so no surprise there), Six Sunflowers (which is the oldest), Traitor’s Glory, Two Boys, Two Moments in Time, and lastly December 30th, 1929. 

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I mean I do try! When I leave comments it’s always nice to get answers, so I think it’s just nice to answer others. :) I do have some comments atm I’ve not answered but. Well. Just look at my url lmao

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

LMAO. I have no idea. I’m just going by the published ones here, but like: character seemingly falls to his death, character finds his mom’s dead on his 9th birthday and is left with his two other underage siblings to fend for themselves in the 1930s ussr, character resigns himself to the fact that his siblings probably hate him as he’s starving to death in a prison camp. Which one’s the angstiest? You choose!!

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Lmaooo well none of them are really _happy_, uh. I think Laid Down By Human Hands has probably the most neutral ending, whereas Six Sunflowers is more bittersweet, but like the sweet is there… And then Two Boys isn’t terrible either? Like it sucks a little cuz that kid’s living in WWII time Finland ya know, but it’s _fine_. I dunno! In truth it’s probably the fic on anon that’s the least terrible, but even that ending’s not a _happy_ one, it’s got unrequited pining in it lol.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Nope! So far at least! I don’t think my fics are popular enough to get it haha.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Nope! I’m almost strictly a gen writer, aside from like. 2 AUs and one TOH wip. I guess some of the WIPs could potentially and maybe should have some fade to black kinda scenes because they’re stories involving a fair amount of romance and in one of them it’s even kind of relevant to the plot. But yeah no. 

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

WELL, okay. You see, I actually started out writing via original fiction? I was like 12 when I made up a story based on a long-lasting play-pretend during recess thing I had going on with my dear friend, and it was. Written and plotted by a 12-year-old. But THEN I got really into the How To Train Your Dragon movies, and then I crossed over my story and HTTYD and then tried (still kinda low-key sorta in the process of) to separate it into my original story again, but this time with dragons! So that’s. Like the craziest journey ahfijsd my original as-of-yet unwritten fantasy story has a crossover sequel with HTTYD lmao. Also just occasionally I think about a potential giant crossover that’s got allllll my faves meeting and interacting, but that’s solely for daydreaming and “lmao wouldn’t it be funny if” -scenarios in my head. I’ve later also crossed the characters from my original story with other ones I’ve liked, in my head lol, but I don’t think I’ve written out any. Other than the TT x HTTYD hybrid. (TT is the WIP name for that original story. it doesn’t stand for anything anymore tho lmao it’s just tt)

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Nope! Not to my knowledge, at least! Again, my fics don’t get enough hits/are too niche for anyone to think about stealing them, I imagine. 

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yeah! Almost all of them! By me. What can I say, I try to fight the good fight to keep my native language alive on the internet and also in my head. 

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No. I did once talk about the possibility with a friend, but nothing ever came out of it. 

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

Hhhh. This is very silly but I don’t really actively ship stuff, and rarely think of ships outside of when I’m watching or reading the source material or something. Thus the one I can feel confident in saying I ship is a…. oc x canon ship sshfskjfsidkfajksaf or maybe it’d be more accurate to say oc x mutated blorbo version of a canon character lmao. It’s mainly in. 2 AUs that have so little to do with the source material that they might as well be original fiction and probably by this point mostly are lol. 

15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

GHHH I want to finish ALL of my big 5 main WIPs because I love them dearly and want to read them, but then again. I don’t know if I ever will because I can’t get myself to fuckin WRITE any of them. So I’m just gonna say all of my main WIPs. That is:

TT (original fantasy story thing)

home front fic (historical fic set in WWII Finland about the friendship between a kid and the soviet POW sent to work on his home farm)

Kingdom AU (girl from the country accidentally befriends the crown prince and there’s politics and they fall in love and some cool stuff and some less cool stuff happens. hard to summarize cuz i’ve never had to, target demographic is like. three people + me. here's the aesthetics and vibe blog it's got)

sad BNHA fic (what if. Eri got ofa. but how? i murder someone to haunt the narrative. easy. sad. sad bnha fd. naming skills on full display here) 

anddddd. hypothetical TOH fic (what if i came up with what happens after TTT before the two other eps of s3 came out and stayed on that path. what if the first thing i wrote about it was hunter falling off a cliff to his death. what then).

Kind of also TOH fic 3 (it’s about evelynnnnn) but that one is. Hopefully. Shorter and has the outline all written out so there’s a bigger likelihood of me finishing it someday. And to be fair the hypothetical TOH fic isn’t that long either, I could get it done, one day, but then the other ones have grown to massive size plotwise so I don’t know if I could ever get them done, actually. I hope so! But ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

16. What are your writing strengths?

I guess my plots are sometimes kinda good? Sad BNHA fic and Kingdom AU are pretty cool on that side. I used to be pretty good at writing dialogue too, but that was back when I a) wrote regularly, b) read a lot, and c) socialized. So. But I used to be good! though back then my plots were real frickin weird lol. in my defense. i was 14 to 17.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Writing itself. That’s the only answer I’ve got because recently I haven’t written enough to know what I’d be bad at. So just. Writing. See I can plot without writing, that’s why I’m good at that lmao

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

Sure! Hell yeah! I’m gonna do that! I have done that! I love it, I love languages. Though translations are appreciated. Though I think it should be for emphasis, more so than just writing it in the language just for the hell of it (though like I had a wip where all the spoken dialogue was to be in Russian because there was so little of it and it was simple enough that I could do that, but i lost my notes for it). I think if it’s just normal dialogue and the pov character knows the language, it’s best to just add like, “they said in Finnish” to the dialogue tag, especially if there’s a lot of it. 

In my personal opinion, also when the character doesn’t know the language, I probably wouldn’t write it out? But then if a character knew the basics of the language and it was maybe one sentence I would write it in the language. Or if it was a really important line, like someone telling another character they love them in their native language, or a culturally significant thing, like, idk the adoption vow in mando'a in the Star Wars universe. But sometimes it’s also just fun to show off your own language skills! So overall, strongly encouraged. Just. Try not to use Google Translate (etc.) for it jfajfasjdn

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Hhooo. Probably the Ginga-fandom, but that one was so brief it barely counts, so I’ll say HTTYD because of the crossover thing. If it’s just fanfic without crossing it over with my own original work lol then Hetalia. 

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

TRAITOR’S GLORY!!!!!! I got to talk about my rather niche but intense area of interest in it, which is Soviet POWs in Finland during the Continuation War 1941-1944. Well, that’s the finished one at least, there are some snippets of WIPs I’ve not posted nor finished that are also very good. Imo. But. Yeah. Most of the other favourite stuff I have, concerning my fics, hasn’t been written. So. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ But Traitor’s Glory is pretty nice. :)  Thanks again for the tag! I guess I'll tag some people, though no pressure: @evevoli @cowboy-garfield @peach-oolong-tea @starcloud-nova @littlekysworld @slightlycrunchy uh. yeah. If you see this and wanna do it you can say I tagged you! :) And no pressure!

[ventrue-in-control]

Jackie Mczyne

since I never made one before cuz im bobo the fool

Name: Jackie Emanual Abdul Mczyne Pronouns: he/him they/them age: 25 forverer but 70 in total (30-7) Nationality: British-Tanzanian Species: Vampire (VTM) Clan: Ventrue Sect: Camarilla Location: Andover (primarily) and Swindon (secondary) Personality: egotistical anarchistic idiot Partner: @misericorsalvator Sire: @keeper-of-lions Notes: This man is a germaphobe and has a bit of OCD. Also can NOT handle physical toutch what so ever. If he was a bird he would be an impundulu

There are no specific rules for interacting with my blog! Just dont be focking racist cuz ill feed your kidneys to the dogs

THINGS ARENT TAGGED SO BE WARNED OF GORE BLOOD AND WHAT HAVE YA NOT you can of course ask me to tag certain things I will appologize because I may very well forget orz plz do remind me.

More rambles under the cut off

You've unlocked the extra rambles! congrats! Im so sorry as this may just be incomprehensible

first of all Hi! Im birdy, 24 years old, a black trans animator from the netherlands. I do da drawing and da makin of da gaymes. I stream on twitch you are always free to reach out to me here in DM's or else on discord The-Nerdy-Birdy#0918 <- JUST BE AWARE I was terrible social anxiety and I may be slow to respond THAT'S NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU PLEASE KNOW THAT I LOVE YOU Im just silly :3 and have my moments. I promise ya tho I love to talk and ramble.

WITH THAT OUTTA THE WAY MY BOI OH HOW I LOVE HIM SO HE CAN SOMETIMES BE A BIT OF A BITCH AND I AM SORRY. HE CAN BE MEAN. ITS JUST A CHARACTER THOUGH BUT IF I EVER GO TOO FAR LET ME KNOW PLEASE I DONT WANNA HURT NOBODY

anyways, quick summary about jackie.

Jackie went through a lot in his living years! going through the 50s to the 80s as a black man in the uk certainly was something! He used to be a genuine sweet and caring kid and now he still cares but hes very jaded by the world. He used to be part of the british black panther party and he has many opinions bout stuff and politics! but he has quited down quite a bit after his embrace.

he has a bit of a shortfuse cuz folk keep threathening him and hurting him so he is quite defensive. sadly he does not have the brains to see yet that he himself also hurts people and he should be a bit nicer to folk sometimes!

He cares tons about his friends and those who he considers fam. he does not enjoy seeing folk get hurt but.... if push comes to shove he will always choose himself. hes all he has. and all he can rely on and nobody is worth destroying himself over. atleast he'd like to think that. he does however often finds himself choosing his friends over himself and he hates it.

EHHHH FASHION WISE. He basically runs a GIANT company called SALMON which both makes ready to wear as haute couture. he is not the sole designer of it al. but he is most well known. he is a bit of a control freak with his company (not much better outside it either) so he will pick up more work than he should resulting in him always stressing about something.

he has many other companies also and a whole buncha other lore PLEASE ASK ME BOUT ME BOI HE IS ALMOST 10 YEARS OLD AND HE MEANS A LOT TO ME.

EHHH IDK WAT ELSE TO ADD SO U GET SMALL FUN FACTS!

Jackie is terrified of moths his handwriting is actually a perfect typewriter font he is really good at math! unlike me! cant see shit without his glasses was part of the british black panther movement HIS FEEDING RESTRICTION IS FOR ME TO KNOW AND YOU TO FIGURE OUT TEEHEE He wishes to become prince someday fave color is salmon of course.

HAVE SOME MORE ART OF HIM ALSO

HIS COTERIE BTW HOW COULD I FORGET! He is actually from a still active chronicle! though I most things on dash arent like canon lol In order the characters are: Tommy Riley Jackie Ada and Chris. they all hate each other and they has an awful time together :)

[deviantartdramahub]

Sooo, just coming back again real quick bc Tri alerted me I've been name-dropped. https://www.deviantart.com/ron-fnf/status-update/The-fluctuation-of-posts-after-1047546425

Just gonna copy-paste my response I messaged her, and give some additional thoughts after. Anyways here's what I said to Tri: "Hellpp the fact his salty ass is clinging on desperately to this stupid drama and isn't even making any sense, then tells me to get a life? Lmaoo what a loser, I don't even post in the group much anymore."

So yeah, I'm not really able to make much commentary out of his post besides that bc I'm missing context and/or Ron's going on some short, insane vague-ramble just spouting out salty insults bc the minor he wanted to harass blocked him MONTHS AGO. Don't know who I'm kidding, bc it's obvious the latter is the case, but it could very well also be the former, so who knows.

So yeah as I said, I don't even post here anymore, so why are you calling me out of all people? I mean, I'm glad no other person really has to deal with your BS, but you really that salty, sweetie? You support that buried-in-the-ground troll group who's desperately trying to crawl out of their grave, but can't handle me standing up for myself? Or me laughing at the pathetic absurdness of Mod-S's latest post? Why of course ya do hon, you're a brain-washed attack-dog devoted to your master, and will blindly attack anyone she does, despite the fact she apparently no longer has time for any of you sorry asses. That's WHY I don't post much in the group anymore! because she abandoned you guys, and is pretty much no longer making any posts for me to call out, lmaoo!

Anyways I'm gonna go back to chilling and doing my own thing as Ron foams at the mouth and seethes at the fact I'm not letting myself be a voiceless victim. And it'd be greatly appreciated if someone tells me about whenever this loser name-drops me again, because no way in Hell am I gonna obsessively check his account 24/7 to see for myself. :3

(And if anyone's curious, I simply logged out of DA to be able to look at his post. But Ron deary, don't try getting all pissy about that and accuse me of harassment or block-evading, or whatever-the-fuck, since you're the one who name-dropped someone who blocked you in the first place! ^w^

The sad probability is they're likely acting on association.

[dc-ocs-200x]

FILE

Trigger Warnings: Beginning of Backstory delves into kid fights (like dog fights but with kids), murder, and imprisonment.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

General Information

Name: Wrath "Lucias"

Nicknames: Lu, Luce, Luci, Lu-Lu, Little Soldier, Braxie

Age: Melina years worth, physically appears to only be 22-24

Species: Embodiment of wrath, immortal being, once was a Cambion

Gender: AMAB, identities as agender

Pronouns: it/its/itself

Sexuality: Demisexual panromantic

D.O.B.: October 29th

Zodiac Sign: Scorpio ♏️

Alignment: Bounces between Chaotic Good and Neutral Neutral/Neutral Good depending on if it's angry or not

Classification: Alpha

Physical Appearance

Skin color: White with a reddish-tan tint

Hair Color: Half black (left side), half white (right side)

Hair Style: Doesn't put much effort into its hair, often leaving it messy looking, it's length often stays just below it's ears (per Cain's demands) but it has had it longer and shorter before

Eye Color: Red

Wears: Much like it's hairstyle, Wrath isn't fussy over what it wears, when it's in control of its outfits it usually goes with comfortable shirts, sometimes a hoody, and pants (grunge style pants either ripped, with chains, or with deigned patches), however when asked, it has been known to wear the more formal taste of it's uncles choices, frilly button ups and all

Personality

Personality: Wrath is the walking form of 'if looks could kill'. To be the barer of the sin of wrath, it is surprisingly calm and not one to immediately jump into conflict. When it is worked up, however, all hell breaks loose. It has a surprisingly big heart for that sin as well, willing to take on all the responsibility of everyone's safety against anyone or anything. Emotions are not Wrath's forte, seeing as it had been taught to suppress them from a young age but it has worked on better expressing itself, throughly interested in the emotions it can feel and how far those feelings can go. In pair with not being good with its feelings, it doesn't express them too much as a means of intimidation, it wants strangers to be weary of it, and in turn of its family, as a means to protect them. While having a stronger build due to its powers, Wrath is extremely skillful and agile, very light on its toes mainly from its days before it was sin barer of wrath. While not popping up all the time, Wrath can be extremely sensitive especially with its past as it can remember every fight it has gone through, every face of every child its fought (and killed), every outcome of the fights, on those days it tends to be more secluded and moody, though it tries not to make it obvious not wanting to worry its family. It has a photographic memory.

Likes: Cuddling, being held, cooking, protecting others, learning, being read to, emotions, rain and mud puddles, playful wrestling, coloring

Dislikes: Being seen as weak, nightmares, it's photographic memory, having its picture taken, pettiness, not having some kind of control over its emotions

Fears: Hurting others, being heavily reminded of its past, being seen/called evil, mild fear of strong storms

Quotes

Quote 1: "If you have something to say, then say it out loud, jackass."

Quote 2: "I am being nice. Do I make you angry, uneasy?"

Quote 3: "Preferred pronouns?"

Quote 4: "Alright, Lu. A bit easier, huh?"

Quote 5: "By choice. They can respect me regardless of what I go by. Can you?"

Quote 6: "So... we kinda have that in common, Uncle Cain? Your mark and my mark, as a reminder?"

Quote 7: "Stop asking me questions, I hate to see you cry."

Quote 8: "We are one in the same. Oh, you take all of the pain away."

Quote 9: "She.... she was... sweet... always looking out for me... tried shielding me from dad and his ways.... but, as he put it 'she couldn't do it forever'... she'd hug me close and tell me things about the human life every night. But every night it was something different. Lullabies, stories, sometimes she'd ramble random facts until I fell asleep."

Relationship With Other Characters

Envy "Raven": One of Wrath's best friends and one of two sins that it's willing to be a little more open with in regards to its insecurities and fears, Wrath refuses to let anyone hurt a hair on Envy's head and it dares anyone to try, it is willing to take Envy's vents, even going as far as to provoke his anger just to help his mood, letting him wrestle with it.

Pride "Athena": Sees Pride as its little sister making it protective over her, especially as it saw Envy and Pride practically glued to the hip when they all were children, it enjoys letting her fuss over its hair and outfits, gladly going along with whatever she wants to put it in.

Greed "Lux": Has a bad tendency to regard Greed like an immature child, often expecting him to break his toys and whine about it afterwards that said, Wrath does find something endearing about it, truly seeing Greed as it's baby brother.

Gluttony "Nyx": Like all the other sins, Gluttony was the youngest sibling it grew up with for a while, so that automatically makes it a lot more protective of her, this is where it's big sibling tendencies shine the brightest.

Sloth "Salem": The Yin to Wrath's Yang, Salem gets to see all sides of Wrath, except for its utter rage (something Wrath thankfully doesn't feel much of these days and is something it doesn't want to show Sloth, worried it will either hurt or scare them), the two balance each other out extremely well, Sloth being the only person that can quickly calm it back down.

Lust "Darcey": More often than not, these two do not get along, Wrath sees Lust as an annoying nuisance, and while Lust doesn't have a thing against Wrath himself, he definitely doesn't help his case by teasing it, that said Wrath still will not tolerate slander against Lust's name and is more than ready to protect and defend him.

Cain: Cain and Wrath do not always see eye to eye, that being said, Wrath is more than prepared to step up to defend Cain against anyone taking it as 'no one gets to say you're a piece of shit except for the people that live in this house', and Cain does hold plenty of endearment towards Wrath himself, finding its wrathful and even violent tendencies entertaining at times.

Abel: Abel was another adult that helped Wrath with its emotional regulation, while not quite to the extent Satan is due to Abel being a rather gentle soul, he was the best adult to calm it down, especially when it was still young, even now as an adult when it feels itself growing agitated but it's usual sources of comfort are busy with their own things, Wrath will be content to go and be simply held by Abel for a short time to settle itself.

Satan: While these two started off extremely rocky, they have an amazing relationship now, Satan helping teach Wrath some kinds of emotional regulation and ways to calm its anger, Satan is the one adult it feels understands its feelings and can help it the best.

Freyja: Sees Freyja as a part of the family, wholeheartedly, it doesn't think there could be anyone to better fit in with their ragtag bunch, and suit Pride so perfectly, that said it is a creature of few words towards her, not that Wrath is much of a talker to anyone.

Mina: Wrath throughly impressed and interested about Mina, seeing as it was one of the first to see that she was a lot more sneaky and clever than she let on, and then being able to survive Greed and his temper tantrums, it will playfully dismiss her as just as childish as Greed seeing as she is his 'playmate' but there obviously is a lot more respect for her than it let's on.

Achilles: Just like Amityville, it automatically took Achilles somewhat under its care, it's not the most present mentor but it is very willing to teach Achilles what it can, especially in regards to his demon powers having seen all of it in Hell, it was the first to point out that his wings are a weapon and not just in the sense they allow him to fly, it also offers what it can in regards to emotions controlling one's physical strength and how to balance the two out.

Amityville: As mentioned, Wrath became somewhat of a mentor to Amity, just as it is for Achilles, also teaching her about her demon powers especially in regards to her tail which also is not just there for decoration, it got to know Amity a little bit easier due to them having a lot of one on one time during the nights, with them both being night owls, it helps out whenever and wherever it can also in regards to emotions, it may not be good at expressing its own but there's no denying it has done its studying.

Backstory

Wrath was born to a woman, Clementine, who wanted children but was unable to have any, leading her to make a deal with an incubus who promised her a child, what the woman didn't realize was she was signing away her life. As soon as she became pregnant, she was locked away in Hell by said incubus. The pregnancy was rough and resulted in Lucias. The first year was as normal as things could be in Hell, but by age two, Lucias had its natural demon abilities peeking through as well as advancing far past the average human two-year-old making its father, Frollo, decide it was time for some 'fun'. He signed Wrath up for a local fight in Hell, 'kid fights' as they were called where demon children of all ages fought each other often times to the death, but at the very least severe injury. From there, that was what what its life consisted of. Training and fighting. It's only break from the horrific cycle was the nighttime, the only time Clementine was able to see her baby. She'd hold it close and soothe it to sleep with talk of the human world and what it was like, sometimes singing lullabies to it, sometimes random facts, stories, whatever she could think of at the time. This, tragically, came to a hard stop when Frollo finally fully drained Clementine of her life-force. He locked her away from Lucias and he forced it to continue fighting for his and other Hellish beings amusement. This was its life until it was about 11 when Cain and Abel got ahold of it. It being framed almost as a kidnapping Lucias was extremely weary of them at first, when it became immortal it took the illness better than most of the other kids, going practically comatose through the first day and sleeping it on and off through the second. Once better was when it first attacked Cain, but with Abel helping talk it back down, Lucias was able to begin its road to being the sin barer of Wrath. It first met Sloth when Cain and Abel brought home their limp body. Wrath was immediately fascinated and infatuated, often sneaking into the room even when not allowed. It was practically glued at the hip once it was able to be.

Extra Information

It's immortality tattoo is placed on the very center of its back, right on the spine which is said to be the most painful spot.

Wrath was originally named Abraxas by its parents, but when Cain and Abel found it, it came up with the first name it could and that eventually stuck. Wrath doesn't mind as it feels this seperates it from it's dad.

It has a scar on its right hand in the shape of a bite mark which it got from when it bit Cain upon still being new to the House of Mysteries.

Is (currently) the only sin that I've adapted to the Netflix version of Sandman, Lucias being a living embodiment of wrath made in order to keep the Waking world's wrath at bay.

While being Satan's sin barer of Wrath, Wrath also is the ruler of the Anger ring of hell.

During its time as a fighter it has seen children like each of the sins die, sometimes even by its own hands.

It has two full on fangs in place of its canines.

When it and Cain get into altercations (very rarely does it happen) both more try to restrain the other into submission more than hurt the other seeing as Cain's mark means Wrath gets hurt seven fold and Wrath is strong enough to cause a lot of physical hurt to Cain, neither want to see the other hurt though.

Despite how they look, Wrath's horns have a kind of velvety texture to them, it's also a bit of a pleasure spot for it in the same response a cat gives to being pet.

Wrath's powers include super strength and super stamina, it also has some lower grade demon powers like energy manipulation but it's been so long since it has used it that it would take some time and energy for it to tap back into it.

A very distinct speech pattern of Wrath's includes skipping letters in its words (some examples I've done in my writings include: 'nimals, suppose', and what're).

Has a love hate relationship with fire.

It's adoption day is celebrated August 5th.

It was the second child obtained but is the oldest in age.

Little Soldier is its special nickname from Cain and Abel, neither are really sure who started it but it simply stuck.

Playlist

You're Not Welcome, Naethan Apollo, 2:30

Mama, My Chemical Romance, 4:38 (♡Theme Song)

Hell's Coming With Me, Poor Man's Poison, 3:32

I Am Damaged, Barret Wilbert Weed & Ryan McCartan, 1:25

My Demons, STARSET, 4:47

Surface Pressure, Jessica Darrow, 3:21

Picrews made of it (not all include its horns or split hair because they weren't an option for the picrew)

One of my favorite Tik Toks of it (Very hard choice because I loved almost all of its)

Defending Cain against someone (idea gotten from the original Dreaming comics issue #8).

Tags: @p3achgutz-blog

[the-corset-witch]

another day done! I ended up staying a bit later than intended, my feet hurt, and worse, the tops of my toes hurt from ‘kicking’ the front end of my shoe....  I don’t know how to describe it, the shoes fit but its weird.  

And my day was straight MADE when I was on drive thru & complimented a lady on her air freshener which said “do no harm but take no bull” with a Texas longhorn on it, and she GAVE ME ONE!!!! just GAVE it to me!!!  I shouldn’t be so surprised by a random act of kindness, but hot dog, it really got me

but not nice was also while on drive thru when I kept getting a creeper vibe off a specific car because they kept complimenting me, like... right at the start of the transaction [or rather, my part, the pay part] and I’m just like “ :) money please :) (you’re awesome) yes thank you :) (you’re awesome) yes thank you :) “ and as i turn to put the money in the money box all i can think is wow it sure is great that my hair is half/half black and pink and I’m so easily identifiable so that I can get abducted on the way to my car or some shit...  ANYWAY obviously that did not happen, but the thought does cross your mind when you’re maybe less than a 5 minute drive from the Amber Haggerman memorial.  

Also, sorry this ramble is so rambly, but on the note of Amber Haggerman, but if you are in the US and you have silenced an AMBER Alert and you don’t know Amber Haggerman’s name, or her story, I beg you, I beg you on my hands and knees, kissing your feet, please look up her story, please learn her name, and please understand that this alert system that has saved tons of children came with truly gruesome murder, and the murderer still walks free.  They are still free, to this day, over two decades later.  And I can still remember when it happened.  My best friend’s older sister freaking knew her.  This could have been a person that I would have known...  Sorry, but god sometimes the thought just hits.  Hits like the Titanic hit that damn iceburg, and sinks my heart

ABOUT FREE READINGS

The data I collect shows I average ~5 readings a day, but receive ~7.  (These numbers are the average).  I’d like to be able to do all the ones that come in within a 24 hour period, but I knew when I started this that sometimes that just wouldn’t be possible, but most of them are getting done within that 24hr period so I’m not gunna beat myself up about it.  I just wanted to address it because there are definitely some people who get the short end of the stick.  I have been doing the free readings when I wake up, before going to the DayJob, so that they get Priority Energy (does that phrase make sense, I just made it up) and they don’t end up with Crappy After Job Energy.  I hope this makes sense, I realize that...  I mean, I could just do the readings, regardless of my own energy, but my dumb neurodivergent brain absolutely will not compromise on this.  I know I could do the readings with any energy, but I cannot have lackluster energy or worse, energy that could taint my readings, I just can’t, I can’t do it.  I get really frustrated at myself because sometimes (a lot of 2022, in fact) I just can’t get my energy right, and my brain won’t let me touch other peoples readings if it’s not, but in the end, this is also a reason why my readings are always the quality that they are.  I always make sure that I am in a good place to give the quality of reading that I would want to receive.  I don’t know, y’all, I just have a love/hate with this part of myself.  Since learning of my neurodivergency I am still trying to come to terms with some things and apply coping mechanisms to others, and this is on the “come to terms with” list.

[knullanon]

Do you have any headcanons for Eve and Mark sharing a darling? I feel like it’s a match made in heaven (or hell depending on how you look at it qoqhjahahaha-)

i'm alive. i'm sorry this took so long, and if you like it pls reblog thank you guys, i love you all :')

mark definitely has more jealous moments than eve. in fact, eve is pretty good at hiding when she's jealous, which is rare, because she spends so much time making sure that you won't leave, and she's pretty confident that you won't leave them.

mark tries to make sure as well, but he definitely has doubts in his abilities so he doesn't have as much confidence as eve, therefore he gets jealous a lot more easily, and it's not fun. he goes from this dorky man to creepy man who doesn't stop the weird stare that has 6 different emotions in one look.

eve, on the other hand, while she does have some self esteem issues, she's also just like "man fuck this" and tries to focus on you. she doesn't necessarily get jealous, she does get a little annoyed whenever someone else has your, lets say, attention.

by that I mean has big issues with people talking to you in a flirty manner.

however, it's better to have her there, because she can see that it's the other person who usually makes the first move, not you. mark, on the other hand, looks like he got hit by a car whenever he catches someone trying to flirt with you.

self esteem issues are big in him, so when he sees you, with someone who's flirting with you... he kinda goes ape shit.

he'll walk up, act like you two need to go somewhere, and then give you the cold shoulder for the rest of the day, eventually it comes to a head, and you'll both get into a mini argument about the whole thing, which usually leaves eve to clean it up for you both and act as a mediator.

now, about the relationship itself, both are actually pretty good. as partners, at least. mark is usually a dork, who talks a little too much, and is almost like a puppy dog around you. he likes talking about his day, what he did, and then he'll let you talk about yours. he figured out he likes hearing you talk, so he likes letting you ramble on, and if you stop talking to try and let him talk he just nods for you to continue on talking.

eve is probably understanding as hell for you tbh. she's basically marks (or yours, depending on who you are) adderall, being like a control in an experiment. she's also always there for you if you ever need her, and believe me, with both of them being heroes almost 24/7, that's a huge statement of love.

I thought about mark and eve kidnapping their shared darling, but honestly, I don't think either would do it. mark has definitely brought it up a couple of times when he became paranoid of you leaving them, but eve would definitely not be on for that. while yes, she could create a cell for you n stuff, she realizes that would be the opposite of what you would want, and also, mark has vv big paranoia. like, it's bad. so she would also take that into consideration.

besides, things are going so well at the moment, there's really no need to. the only time they would do that to you is if they a) killed/hurt someone for you and you found out and disapproved, or b) you were in danger. while the latter in easier to brush off, the former would be a difficult situation for eve and mark to get out of.

which is also why if they do, or basically when, because they would do something like that, eve makes sure that there is nothing left behind. she'll disintegrate something into dust if need be so that no one would find out.

basically the whole relationship is mark being a friendly dork who has low self esteem and high paranoia, while eve has a friendly and loving façade set in front of a vv scary girlfriend.

mark and eve disagree on a little too many things when it comes to you, but they eventually land on a conclusion for you. remember, the thing that binds them together is not only their love for each other, but also their obsession with you.

[wormsmith]

Could I get an Encanto Matchup, please?

so I’m Lexi and my icon is me! (You can also check my "#vintage inspired" tag for a closer look!)

I’m 21, she/her, 5’4, & ISFP.

Pros? I’d say I’m playful, talkative, loyal as a dog, great listener, smiley (albeit I’ve got resting bitch face), sarcastic, and most would probably describe me as either adorable yet cursed or adorably cursed. I’m definitely not a stranger to being called a cryptid lol

Neutral? I’m very sensitive, mildly socially awkward, tend to ramble a lot, I can be a bit of a pack rat (I tend to keep a lot of unnecessary things either out of sentimental value or just cause it think it’s neat even if other people think it’s just junk lol), a tad superstitious, and am a bit of a perfectionist

Cons? I’m shy, anxious, a little clumsy, stubborn, non-confrontational (unless truly needed), and can be petty/passive-aggressive

Likes/Hobbies: Playing bass, secondhand shopping, DIY projects, music, art, photography, and horror movies

Dislikes: Being underestimated, my passions/interests being mocked (let’s just say I’ve always been a bit of a black sheep 😬), being interrupted (I’ve had trouble in the past with coming off as quite literally invisible to peers), and...country music? 🤷🏾‍♀️

Fun facts about me:

* Sometimes I write music (mainly just basslines though)

* I once accidentally won an art show (Yes I do mean accidentally. I wasn’t even planning on entering until I was basically forced to🤡)

* Erm…I used to work at a daycare?

Hope that’s enough info. Thanks in advance!

I match you with . . . Dolores!

First of all, she thinks you are so cute. Unbelievably so. She's going to be awkward and blushing 24/7. You guys look amazing together, we stan.

She enjoys how playful you are! You aren't just partners, you're friends! She likes hanging out with you, she thinks you're fun to be with. She also appreciates how loyal you are - she likes having a partner as dedicated to her as she is to you.

You can chat to her as long as you like, she's great at listening, lol. Just make sure you don't talk too loud. She's happy to listen, but she's also happy that you can reverse the roles, that you'll listen to her, too. The both of you can chat for hours together.

She loves your artistic nature! Both in the sense of your creative hobbies and your creativity in general. She likes a partner with a little spontaneity in certain areas. If you're interested, she would enjoy making art with you - I can particularly see her getting interested in sewing her own clothes because of you (though you're going to need to find a solution about how loud sewing machines can be).

Speaking of clothes, please go shopping with her. Antique stores, whatever form of Goodwill exists in the world of Encanto - she genuinely loves buying vintage clothes, old and used items and giving them a new home. (She also collects a bunch of cool things, so maybe buy some shelves). My apologies to your wallets.

Dolores likes people, but she isn't extremely extroverted. She's happy to help you out with being social when it's needed, but if you don't really feel like talking, then she'll happily stand with you on the sidelines. (People tend to get a little too loud for her anyway).

This is a very small note, but the volume of her voice is so calming whenever you get anxious. ISTG just ask Dolores to whisk you away gently tell you a story, you'll feel better.

The fact that you play bass is a double-edged sword with this one. She loves the fact that you can play (and even write!) music. She will genuinely swoon if you write something for her. However, sometimes the sound can get a little too much, so she'll want to back away. You can catch her quietly standing dozens (or hundreds, if at all possible) feet away, happily listening to you play at a volume that's more comfortable for her.

And people call you a cryptid.

As for being underestimated or mocked, Dolores loves you! She values you! She would never put you down! She, of all people, understands the sort of damage words can do. She makes a point to take an interest in all of your interests, and in all honesty, she may overestimate you a bit. (She's a bit of a romantic.)

Overall, you have yourself a super supportive and absolutely in-love-with-you partner! Everyone thinks you look adorable together, and you have plenty of shared hobbies that you can do together. When you're feeling anxious, Dolores helps calm you down, and when Dolores feels upset, you help bring her joy. There's a lot of sunshine in your future with Dolores by your side!

I hope you liked it <3 Thank you for the ask!

[blouisparadise]

Here are so many amazing bottom Louis fics that were posted or completed during the month of November. We hope you enjoy this list. Happy reading!

1) Work Me Breathless | Explicit | 1678 words

Note: this is the sequel to this fic.

Louis visits Harry at work after the doctor got a new promotion. They christen his new office...

Louis leaves a little breathless.

2) Skeletons In My Closet | Not Rated | 2051 words

Basically soft core porn. Harry decided to treat Louis on Halloween.

3) Looks Like We Made It, Look How Far We’ve Come, My Baby | Teen & Up | 2161 words

Louis and Harry are going to officially move in together, they’ve chosen the house and everything is ready, they just need to wait a few months before the owner gives them the keys.

So what’s the problem, you may ask. Well, they’ve been arguing for days and Louis is honestly considering strangling his alpha with one his ridiculously ugly designer scarf. Okay, not really. But he’s going to lose it soon if they don’t stop fighting.

4) Little Devil | Explicit | 2241 words

The pair had just finished taking a round of shots when the one and only Harry Styles saunters over, clapping Niall on the back to say hello. “Louis,” he drawls out, not even trying to hide the fact that he’s raking his eyes over the smaller boy. “You know this is a costume party, right?” Louis rolls his eyes, starting to ramble on about how he is in a costume and what a nit Harry is when he gets it. Harry is saying Louis is a devil.

“And what are you supposed to be Styles? An angel, really?”

“It’s a costume Lou, ’s not supposed to be real,” he says with a smirk, sliding past Louis but stopping long enough to whisper, “I can assure you, I’m no angel baby.”

5) After the Lilo Kiss | Explicit | 2477 words

"I guess I need to show you who you belong to, hmm baby boy?" he growled in my ear while choking me with his other hand.

6) Oh So Thankful | Explicit | 3034 words

Or the one where Louis and Harry both stay at college for Thanksgiving break, and decide to spend the holiday together.

7) Tell Me What You Want (What You Need) | Mature | 3246 words

Louis didn’t plan on getting laid tonight. When he invited Harry over the day before, it was completely innocent. Just two lads hanging out. He still doesn’t plan on it, no matter how hard he’s getting as Harry’s fingernails start scraping over his nipples lightly every time they pass.

8) Calling Out For Someone To Hold Tonight | Not Rated | 3819 words

Harry’s straight. Louis isnt. They still manage to fall in love.

9) Your Love Delights My Soul | Explicit | 4186 words

"Alpha..." Louis moaned against Harry's lips, chasing the friction against his thigh.

"You are my one and only," Harry bit his jaw, "And you know it quite well. Pretty sure I remind you every night, but you have to rile me, have to make me angry. Why, Omega?"

10) Life and Death | Explicit | 4122 words

In which Louis is Life and Harry is Death.

11) When You Turn Off The Lights | Explicit | 4305 words

Gothie Louis/Normie Harry.

12) On My Mind All The Time, Say You're Mine | Explicit | 9261 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

“Dude, we’re inside, and it’s night time. Those don’t look as cool as you think they do.” Louis could kick himself, he sounded so stupid, but it certainly got the guy’s attention.

It was at that unfortunate moment that he noticed several other things about this hot asshole, that he hadn’t noticed just staring from afar. First, when Louis spoke to him, his gaze was kind of unfocused behind his sunglasses, and secondly, that he had a red and white cane folded up under his arm.

“I’m… Blind,” the man chuckled, awkwardly.  

Louis wanted to melt into a puddle out of pure embarrassment.

“I— am so sorry. I have to go.”

“Hey, wait, wait,” the man soothed, grabbing at Louis’ shoulders before he could get away.

“I’m sorry,” Louis repeated, looking down at his shoes.

“It’s alright,” He cackled. “I get it a lot. More than you know.”

13) Let's Break The Internet | Explicit | 9505 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here. Please note that the pairing for this fic is Louis/OMC.

The one where Louis is an Only Fans baby.

14) With the Certainty Of Tides | Mature | 13980 words

“Love you,” Louis whispered in the dark. He didn’t know what time it was or where the light had gone, he knew that he was in Harry’s arms, basking in the afterglow of all their love and he’d be a fool to not tell Harry that. As if Harry didn’t know.

“Love you,” was whispered back, as if Louis didn’t know. They confessed to each other as if it was their first time saying it, raw and painful, and listened to it the very same way, but they knew those words to be the only ones true.

With all the certainty of the tides, with all the light from the sun, with all the steady beats of their hearts, they were deftly in love, in secret and so loudly. They were brave and fearless and strong and hopelessly devoted in every sense of their breaths.

“We made it, baby,” Harry mumbled, bringing their lips into a final kiss, sweet and soft and the color of pink. They already knew that, didn’t fight tooth and nail and argued through every petty year and bleed their hearts into the words they sang and on their skin for them to have not made it home.

They were home.

15) A Moment In Time | Explicit | 14004 words

The one where Harry and Louis used to be together, until they weren’t, but with a twist of fate and a bit of magic, could this be their chance to find forever in each other’s arms?

16) I'm Still A Little Bit Yours | Mature | 14921 words

“Harry?” Louis asked to the empty apartment. "What the hell?" He sat up on the bed, his comforter pooling around his waist. The place wasn’t big enough to lose someone. Harry must have left in the middle of the night. And then he felt it. The new twinge of pain in his already bruised heart. He forcefully threw his upper body back and grunted in frustration. Then he looked over to the bedside table and noticed a note under the cup of cold chamomile tea he never got around to drinking.

He reached over and there were only two words scrawled on the otherwise blank page, “I’m sorry.”

He was so damn stupid! He curled up on his side sobbing and trembling. He covered his face with the comforter, tears soaking his pillow, as he begged his body to go back to sleep.

17) I Couldn't Face A Life Without Your Lights | Mature | 15538 words

Louis and Harry are college students who haven't been the same in the past two years.

18) Practice In Pencil, Seal It In Pen | Explicit | 16486 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

Harry is in love with Louis but he doesn't know.

19) Bang Bang (My Baby Shot Me Down) | Not Rated | 16683 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

The one where Harry wants a little more in the bedroom and has a habit of putting his foot in his mouth.

20) The Animals, The Animals | Not Rated | 16721 words

Admittedly, it’s not the first time Louis Tomlinson finds himself in handcuffs.

The difference this time is these handcuffs are attached to a year long sentence. Not just that, but a year long sentence sharing a cell with a possibly mute 19 year old with dark eyes and even darker secrets.

21) Colder Weather | Mature | 19103 words

When Harry comes around, it’s the coldest time of year. Louis, for once, just wants Harry to take him away from colder weather.

22) Across the Grey, Salty Sea | Explicit | 19968 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

Prompt 212: Alex from Dunkirk and French escort/prostitute Louis who ends up in Alex’s quarters more nights than not. Alex gives him his dog tag to wear maybe just a lot of smut and dirty talk with Louis being a pretty princess.

23) Blinded By The Sparks | Explicit | 22205 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

Harry is a scammer who drifts from casino to casino. Louis is the new waiter who wants in on the scam.

24) Rainbow Bloom | Mature | 22711 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

Louis is in denial. Louis has been in denial for far too long. Then Harry enters his life and everything changes.

25) What A Sight For Sore Eyes | Not Rated | 24216 words

Louis’ playing Danny in their uni’s production of Grease. They’re missing a Sandy, and Harry’s sort of been in love with Louis for a year.

Everything else just kind of happens.

26) MISSING | Mature | 26950 words

Louis brothers report Louis missing after they can’t get hold of him for 24hours

Harry Styles and Charlie Stone, detectives of the teenage homicide and missing persons division, are long time friends of the Tomlinson's and take the case.

27) Even The Best Laid Plans | Explicit | 25175 words

Louis wants to have sex with someone and decides Harry is the perfect alpha for the job.

28) Sunflowers, Sunshine, And You | Explicit | 28778 words

Sunshine county is small but mighty and Harry takes pride in knowing nearly each and every person that lives inside of it. For nearly eleven years now he’s been sheriff, and not one of them he’s ever regretted settling down here.

He knows the road names like the back of his hand, knows the people and the animals and the way the world works here. In all of the time he’s been here, not a thing has changed.

So, all things considered, when he starts seeing a beat up pickup truck roaming through town with plates he’s never seen before, Harry, to be frank, jumps on that like a fly on fresh dog shit.

29) Blue Songs Are Like Tattoos | Explicit | 30739 words

“Good morning, University of California, you’re listening to KALX 90.7 FM Berkeley, this is DJ Harry Styles. If the owner of the tapes I’ve been finding around the studio doesn’t come forward and introduce himself, I’m going to continue tossing them straight in the trash!”

or the DJ Harry and Rockstar Louis fic.

30) Sweet Like Honey | Explicit | 33117 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

Harry and Louis need money and they find an unconventional solution in the form of PornHub. It’s not supposed to be a big deal.

31) When Our Worlds They Fall Apart | Explicit | 42228 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

Harry put his hand over his heart as if Louis had wounded him. “You’re so harsh, my liege! Perhaps you need to relieve some tension…” He let his voice trail off suggestively.

“The day I ask YOU to relieve tension is the day I lose all my wits and join the Imperials,” Louis said. “It will never happen”

Prompt 325: Star Wars AU with Harry as Han Solo and Louis as Leia.

32) Somewhere In Between | Explicit | 42765 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

Louis wakes up early. He brushes his teeth and can only stomach a piece of toast for breakfast, dressing quickly and heading for the car. He pulls into the parking lot of the Department of Dominance and Submission just as they’re unlocking the doors. It takes him all of an hour in the uncomfortable chairs to fill out the paperwork to the best and most accurate of his ability, handing it over to the receptionist as soon as he’s finished and wiping his sweaty palms on his business trousers.

There’s a high chance that within ten to fifteen business days, Louis will be matched with a dominant.

Shit.

33) Spoonful of Sugar | Explicit | 42900 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here. This fic is also a sequel to this fic.

Louis Tomlinson cares for his family above all else, a fact that’s led him on a twisted path peddling drugs to support them. Just as he’s made the decision to jump ship, Louis gets snared between the two largest crime syndicates in the city. To keep his family safe he’s forced to trust the man that failed to keep his promise two years ago, the resident drug lord he’s unknowingly been working for, Harry Styles.

34) Breakable Heaven | Explicit | 44594 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

“What do you think?” Louis gets captured by Harry’s green eyes, unable to look away or even take a breath.

“I think you’re the most magnificent creature I’ve ever met.”

“You must not have met many creatures then.”

Harry’s eyes glance downward to Louis’ lips and his tongue darts out to wet his own. “None like you.”

35) You're The Habit That I Can't Break | Not Rated | 44940 words

When Louis crosses paths with a green eyed stranger in prison, he learns that some habits aren't so bad.

36) Fine Line (The Story of Us) | Not Rated | 46191 words

Walking through Harry's album Fine Line. Each chapter reflects a song off the album.

Harry knew he was a lucky guy, really he did. He knew that in the cosmic pulling of straws he had pulled the long one and basically won the lottery. With a number one debut album, millions of adoring fans, and many a celebrity praising his work Harry should feel happier. He should be skipping instead of walking, singing instead of talking, and grinning from ear to ear. Maybe he was ungrateful. Maybe he was numb to it all. Or maybe he had a big, ocean-sized crush on his best friend.

37) Tastes Like Summer, Smiles Like May | Explicit | 47519 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

A cold prince, an alpha with nothing left to lose and a kingdom with a secret.

38) A Silent Whisper (That's Left Unsaid) | Explicit | 50842 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

A Fake Relationship & Exes to Lovers AU ft a failed proposal ten years ago, an oblivious Harry, an overworked Louis, Zayn as the protective best friend, a meddling aunt and a lot of talks about weddings and rings.

39) Lost And Found | Explicit | 51736 words

Where Louis is just looking for his dog but finds love along the way.

40) Don't You Know That I'm a Moon in Daylight? | Explicit | 58770 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

Prompt 79: Louis and Harry fell in love in the 18th century, Louis wanted Harry to convert him into a vampire, but he ended up resenting Harry for it. Fast forward to our modern days, they haven’t seen each other since then, but one day they meet again through a mutual friend. Harry was bitter for a long time, but he accepted that being angry wouldn't erase the fact that Louis was the love of his life. He wanted to court and spoil Louis like in their original time period, but Louis avoided him every time Harry tried to reconnect. Happy ending!

41) The Guesthouse | Explicit | 61951 words

Louis has a secret that could break him. With every trip to the Guesthouse, with every fuck he offers himself up for, he gets a piece of the freedom back that he's lost.

Seven nights a year he goes to the exclusive sex club; every day he fights to keep that little bit of information to himself.

And there's another thing - his unwavering and pointless obsession with his bandmate.

There's the Guesthouse, and then there's Harry, and Louis works tirelessly to keep the two apart. Soon, very soon now, he won't be able to.

42) My Friend Lost A Bet | Mature | 74965 words

The one where Louis ends up on the list of potential fake-boyfriends for Harry Styles because Stan really sucks at football bets.

43) In A Sea Of Mist | Explicit | 126725 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

A Greek Mythology/Camp Half-Blood AU where Harry is lost, the road to peace is a wretched one, and somehow, through a mist of confusion and regrets, Louis seems to be the only thing that makes sense and everything Harry needs.

Check out our other fic rec lists by category here and by title here.

You can find other monthly roundup fic rec lists here.

[meruz]

Aforementioned long ask post please excuse me while i try to figure out tumblr's new text editor. I’ll get into the art meme questions first and then the rest at the end.

Ok first of all thank you all for sending in questions! Giving me an excuse to talk hehe. I’ll address these in number order. Here’s a link to the ask meme for reference but also I’ll restate the question for ease of reading.

1. When did you get into art?

Super cliche answer but I don’t remember a time where I WASN’T the weird art kid! I started keeping a dedicated sketchbook when I was about 12? But here’s a page from my kindergarten journal about what I want to be when I grow up.

2. What art-related sites have you ever signed up for? 

LOL this is a weird question. Not sure why so many people want to know. Anyways I definitely had a dA. more than one dA account. I used to browse oekakis when I was a kid but I think I was only signed up to some small ones that internet friends owned. What else...? Mangabullet,Tegakie, Paintberri, iscribble back when that was a thing, instagram if that COUNTs, I used to post art on livejournal and dreamwidth too. Patreon, I guess. Gumroad, inprnt, bigcartel, storenvy all for selling stuff.

In terms of resources.. I have a schoolism account that I’m sharing with friends. Used to take classes on coursera for free. I signed up to textures.com for work recently haha. I can’t remember if I ever had an account on posemaniacs. Did they have accounts...? I definitely used to visit all the time.

3. Show us your oldest piece of art you have on hand.

Alright here’s me actually logging into my old deviantart account. These are from September 2008 So I was 13 years old. I don’t have a deviantart account from before then because 13 was the required age for having an account and I didn’t want to lie about my age because I wanted people to be impressed by how young yet clearly incredible at art I was LOL.

4. What defines your artistic style?

You guys are probably more equipped to answer this than me but uh... I wanna say... Focus on colors. And... a slightly heavy hand? Like confident... not always well-considered mark making HAH...

Also I think I have a pretty healthy mix of american comics/manga influences. I feel like people who are into american comics always think my art is too manga and people who are into anime/manga always think my art is too american. And I’m taking that as a good sign.

5. Do you practice other styles/have you tried other styles in the past?

I like to think I switch it up a bunch! I mean, these are pretty different, right?

I think I’ve mentioned this before but one thing I really took away from art school is that, for an illustrator at least, art style shouldn’t be consistent. Your greatest weapon is changing the aspects of your style based on the task, the emotions and message you want to illustrate etc. So depending on the project I’m working on, the fandom I’m drawing for, whether I want something to be funny or serious or dramatic, I’ll change things about my style all the time.

One thing I don’t rly post on here is really tight polished work and that’s because I do that for my day job haha. If you’re not paying me... I’m probably not gonna color in the lines.

6. What levels of artistic education have you had?

I have a whole ass diploma LOL. Bachelor of Fine Arts in Illustration. from the Rhode Island School of Design. And I had a great college experience tbh. Besides the student loans. If any of you guys are thinking about art school feel free to e-mail or message me questions or concerns, I’ll be happy to help. Be as honest as I can be.

7. Show us at least one picture you drew or sketched recently that you did not put on a public site.

heres the wandavision kids. Uhh what else do I have...I feel like I’m rummaging for loose change here...

assorted valentines prep doodles

8. What is your favourite piece that you have done?

Well, obviously this is gonna change all the time and generally it’s gonna be my most recent piece LOL. So yeah, why the hell not. I’ll say it’s this one. I have a pretty short memory which I count as a blessing for an artist. I don’t dwell that long on older work and it keeps me moving forward.

10. What do you like most about your art?

I like that it’s something that only I would make! I had this thought fairly recently and I wrote it down in my sketchbook, it’s pretty cheesy and rambling but it felt revolutionary at the time:

So yeah. I like my art best when it’s the most me and for me. And I like it least when it feels like I’m just making something for social media or for other people’s expectations or whatever.

14. What do you like drawing the most?

Kids in baggy clothing are like my go-to LOL idk if that’s obvious. but also I like being challenged so lately I’ve really loved drawing multi-character compositions, environments, weird angles, etc.

oh i LOVE drawing the underside of shoes lol. And bandages. People that are kinda beat up.. I think it comes from getting a bunch of cuts all the time. I’m always patching myself up and I want to patch characters up too.

15. What do you like drawing the least?

mmm I try to find something to like in every drawing but lets see... I don’t like doing commissions of people’s dogs. Just because it’s normally like... a family friend and my mom volunteered me without my consent and I don’t even really know what they’re expecting me to draw and I don’t even get to meet the dog. Also I’m not that great at dog anatomy. Trying to learn though.

18. What is your purpose for drawing?

This could have a million answers! Uhhh to GIT GOOD??? But also to express myself... and also to make money... I mean it depends on what the drawing IS. I draw fanart mostly to connect to people in the fandom so if you ever see me drawing fanart please take it as like an open invitation to talk to me about the character haha. 

20. How would you rank your art? (poor, mediocre, good, etc.)

Good!!! I have a lot of self-confidence primarily born out of ignorance and a short attention span. If I don’t think too hard about how many other artists are mindblowingly unfathombly good... its easy to think I’m good too! LOL

In all seriousness though, I think the opinion a person has of their art is like a crazy balancing act, right? Like you have to think you suck enough to want to get better but also you have to think you’re good enough to not want to give up. I think we’re all walking that line, I know I am! But also I’m a glass half-full type of person so. Most of the time I feel good about it.

22. List at least one of your “artspirations.”

This is a good question because I’ve been trying and failing to put together one of those “influence map” memes for like a full month now. What’s giving me a hard time is I feel like none of these are actually really obvious “““influences”““ in my art? Like it’s hard to see a lot of them in the work I make...? But idk maybe you guys’ll see what I can’t.

And these are just a couple! God there’s so many more. I could talk about other artists for ages, from all different genres of art. Daumier, Rockwell like every illustrator out there, Dana Gibson, Alex Toth, Hiroshi Yoshida, a lot of the Brandywine School. Lots of current working artists too, Karl Kerschl, frikkin Masashi Kishimoto lol, Jake Wyatt, Richie Pope, Edouard Caplain, Matt Cook, Sachin Teng, - lots of big internet artists, Sophie Li, Freddy Carrasco, Milliofish, Angela Sung... like all my friends from art school too. I could just keep going but I’ll stop for now lol.

24. Do you have a shameful art past? (recolour sprite comics, tracing art, etc.)

I mean if that’s how we’re defining shameful?? sure LOL. It’s not sprite comics but I used to do pokemon sprite recolors all the time. And I used to trace manga panels and color them... Granted this was all when I was like under 12 yrs old so it’s not even embarrassing. Can you really call it shameful when a 7 year old wets the bed or whatever? Not really. In fact some of these are cool as fuck. Look

25. Draw a picture!

Man I’m so tired now but here.

I used to get a lot of compliments for drawing people smiling lol but I don’t think I’ve drawn a lot of smiling lately.. here’s proof I’ve still got it.

OK MEME DONE. onto the rest.

I read this ask first thing when i opened my computer in the morning and it made me really emotional.. I’m so glad my sketches could help you!!

I think a lot of artists on social media talk about the struggle of making art but imo not enough people talk about the joy! Like I know it’s corny but. I really meant what I said at the beginning of that sketchbook about re-contextualizing art around process and progress > product and perfection. I think its super important..! The strength of messy, unfinished, and energetic art! For the feeling of it, for the love it!

That's crazy!!! I hope you like 'em. The whole line of x-books is really good rn imo.

Hi! I totally have the answer for digital stuff on my faq lol. But in terms of drawing on paper.. it varies! I tend to use sketchbooking and any on-paper doodling I do as a way to loosen up/warm-up or experiment. But right now my go-to aresenal is:

from top > bottom

- kuretake no.55 doublesided brush pen

- tombow fudenosuke

- muji 0.38 ballpoint

- medium size poscas

- grey tombow double brush pens

- good ol bic mechanical pencil

not EXACTly sure which inking you referring to from my sketchbook but if I had to take a guess it'd probably be the kuretake no55. That's been my main inker, lately. Great for sketching with the thin end too.

You can print out and eat my art if you like. Just please don't mass produce or re-sell. <3

Thanks! I've come to accept that my art is always gonna be sort of gestural and painty naturally. It's getting it to tighten up enough to be legible that's hard lol...

uh yeah lol I agree actually. I think yolei is great.

I assume these asks are related? LOL

1) Yeah totally true. I love David.

2) I don’t take requests, sorry! But if you want to commission me to draw Legion i would be MORE than happy to. Just e-mail me at isellhotdogs@gmail.com.

<33333333333333333333333333

[danganronpa-oneshots-headcannons]

Hello! If you can could you do Fuyuhiko, Gundham, Kokichi and Ryoma with a clingy and shy crush? Hanging around them during the killing game because they feel safe when they're around.

☁︎︎~Thank you so much for the request! I find this somewhat adorable! Much love 💕//

☁︎︎~Fuyuhiko, Gundham, Kokichi, and Ryoma with a reader who hangs around them during the killing game!

☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~

☁︎︎~Fuyuhiko

•Would probably try to shake you off at first.

•”Don’t fuck with me! I’ll kill you if you take another step forward!”

•He doesn’t-

•Finally he gives up trying to get you off of him and let’s you follow him like a puppy.

•In all honesty he thinks your somewhat cute but he’d never say that.

•Your always lightly tugging his sleeve or touching his arm.

•You felt somewhat safe with him.

•And although he’d let out a ‘Tch’ or mumble a, ‘Don’t fuckin touch me.’ he doesn’t mind it.

•When Peko’s trial is over, he’s much more connected to you.

•Despite the height comparison, he’s always putting you behind him if something is going on.

•After losing Peko, there is no way in hell he could lose you.

•You were too precious.

•All that mattered to him was that you were safe and protected by him.

•Someone is messing with you?

•He’s on their ass right away.

•Expect to always have an alibi for the class trails.

☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~

☁︎︎~Gundham

•When you first met him you were a bit intimidated by him with the whole demon talk.

•Once it’s announced your in a killing game however, all of that changes.

•”What on earth are you doing fiend!”

•Seeing that you were latched onto his arm, he jumped back.

•He’s not used to this type of stuff-

•Slowly gets used to it after some time.

•If your feeling somewhat upset or scared, he’ll bring out one of his hamster for you to visit.

•If your interested in it, he’ll ramble all sorts of facts about hamsters, dogs, cats, any animal he has encountered.

•Calms you down instantly.

•His voice is like a lullaby to you.

•Sometimes you’d just ask him to start talking and he’ll gladly do so.

•”You want me to tell you a story?... Fine but only this once small kit.”

•Calls you kit because that’s what you remind him of!

•A lost kitten following him around!

•Feel free to latch onto him whenever! He’ll understand your stressed and will either pull you aside or closer to him.

☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎☁︎︎~Kokichi

•Kokichi honestly wouldn’t care.

•I mean, he’s already clingy himself so it’s a win win situation.

•Now he has someone to chase him around the halls!

•Would probably tease you 24/7.

•”Neeheehee! If you wanted to touch me you could’ve just asked!”

•Will have you a blushing mess in no time.

•”Awww! That’s adorable Y/N!”

•Your the only one who can somewhat see through his lies.

•I mean, your always around him so you know what’s true and what’s not.

•”Awh.. you caught me again!”

•Your so fricken cute-

•Will tell you tons of stories about dice!

•He always says they’d love you.

•Although he acts like a child, he’ll make sure your protected.

•If someone is picking on you, he has no problem calling them out.

•Seriously... no problem.

•Espically if it’s Miu that’s picking on you.

•In the class trials, he will always be your alibi.

•And say if you don’t have an alibi, he will happily lie and say he saw you doing your thing.

☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~

☁︎︎~Ryoma

•”Huh?.. you want to hangout with... me?”

•He seems a bit hesitant.

•I mean, he’s never had someone who wants to be around him constantly.

•Goes with it nonetheless.

•He’s not too big on the touching part so be prepared for him to either shake you off or stand there stiffly.

•Once he gets to know you however, he’s much more chill with it.

•Finds it cute how you always stand behind him despite his height.

•He might’ve placed his hat on your head once-

•Found it adorable but would never say that-

•Doesn’t mind the fact you follow him around everywhere.

•Gives him a solid alibi too.

•Your probably the one who prevents his death as well.

•He owes his life to you for that.

•In class trails he makes sure you are off of the ‘suspicion list’.

•”That’s impossible. They were with me the whole time.”

•For once, he’s found something he cares about and he’ll fight till the end to protect it.

☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~☁︎︎~

[jidai]

jidai’s budget mutuals/friends appreciation

Hi, all! I’m quite late with this but I decided to put a small friends and mutual appreciations post in hopes of brightening up the end of this year a little bit. ❤️ If you were tagged, please make sure to check below for a small little message from me. However, I want to make it very clear that I truly appreciate all of my mutuals. You guys brighten up my dash and always reblog or create so many funny and creative posts. I just wanted to give a few special shout outs to those that have taken out the time to reach out and interacted with me past my ask box or we just see each other often.

The messages are ordered by your URL, so you might have to scroll for awhile before you see your messages. I’m so sorry lmao. 

Happy New Years, everyone!

@25th​​, Nonnie, the Young Genius. bro, remind me how old you are 🧍‍♀️ Like my brain CANNOT fathom the thought that you’re so skilled at SO many things and you’re not even in your twenties??? PLEASE SPARE THE TALENT. i will even accept crumbs. But I’m writing to tell you that you are such a wonderful presence on my dash. I always look forward to your gfx. They’re so SO good and you’re improving from one post to another. Like WOW. Now, you’re even starting an art blog, too? You’re so dedicated to the arts. I respect that a lot. Your hard work and commitment will bring you very far in life, whatever you decide to do. 

I love interacting with you. You’re such a big sweetheart and full of positivity and energy. I look forward to seeing more of your art and gfx ❤️

@biscuitwalk​, Dann, the AK Wiz. Dann, I know you’re not as active on here so idk when or if you will ever read this but I want to say that I miss you and your creations so, so much. I will say it a hundred times over and OVER but you inspire me so goddamn much. You have no fucking idea. Your works are absolutely gorgeous and unique. I can look at it once and I can instantly recognize your style (and your cute lil’ pufferfish <3). The way you utilize colors and implement various techniques, shapes, textures into your work. Goddamn, you’re so good. I always look to your work if I ever need inspiration and they help me brainstorm. God, I wish I could put it into words how much I adore your works.

We didn’t really talk for long but you seemed like such a kind and fun person to be around. I wish you the best in your future endeavors, wherever you are. Stay safe <3

@elriccs, Mirai, the Short King. 🧍‍♀️ ok look I know, I know I’m TERRIBLE at replying to you and I’m so fucking sorry. I absolutely love to talk to you but my dumbass cannot seem to reply in a timely manner LASELKSAL. That’s on me and I gotta do better. Anyways!!! Thank you SO fucking much for always leaving such kind messages on my work. I swear to god you’re one of my biggest hype man and I ALWAYS look forward to reading your tags. They’re so funny and it makes me all tingly and happy inside. Bro, like, you just radiate big fun vibes, bro. I really hope that I can get to know you better so I can just insult you until it’s too late to walk away </3

And of course, let me also remind you that I love your works so much. They way that you utilize your textures and those muted colors... OOMPH *chefs kiss* I will always love--

@lockhvrts​​, Em the Soulsborne GOD. hi em 🥺 it’s been awhile since I’ve had a proper conversation with you and I hope you’re doing okay! I miss you and our conversations where we do nothing but geek out and complain about the game industry lmao. if you manage to read this, I just wanted to let you know I miss your presence here. It’s been kinda dull not seeing your beautiful soulsborne gifs and your game rants. Let’s catch up soon. <3 stay safe and well!

@nathanprescutt, Benn, the Man. BENNNNNNNN.  I love you a lot bro. I know we haven’t had long conversations for some time and I hope I can change that! You were my first friend on this blog and I will always appreciate it. I remember us just geeking out over your works and how I would always send you a gfx request like once a week LMAO. The one thing that I have always appreciated about you was the fact that you’re very opinionated (if not, very vocal on your stance on things) and you hold your ground. There were a few time where you encouraged me to speak on topics that I think I shouldn’t and that stuck with me for quite awhile. I’m still a nervous rambling mess when it comes to debates but just know that the one time you supported me to voice my opinion--I hold it very dear to my heart. 

While I don’t spend much time together, I will always remember our animal crossing session. It was  so much fun just trashing and chilling on your island. Especially the bar :( that bar was fucking AMAZING. Maybe once FFXVI comes out, we can geek out hehe

Also, thank you so much for sending in photos of all your doggos, omg. I miss seeing them so much I hope they’re doing well. Stay hot, my German bro lol. Ich bin sehr dankbar, so eine tolle Freundin zu haben. ❤️❤️❤️

@noxdivina​, Lin the Big Dick Daddy Kind. The church is open for business bitch and I’m here to preach the GOSPEL.

Okay, jokes aside, I’m really happy that we became mutuals. You’ve always give off this like, mysterious cosmic vibe (????? huh). And your selfies just further proves that you are wtf. But you’re always so kind to those that you interact with. You’re an absolutely sweetheart and like I just want to give you a giant hug every time we interact. You’re such a soft human being. It’s so nice being around you. It’s like being tossed in the oven and baked at 250 degrees F for 25 minutes. And to boot you’re really talented, hello? God really said let there be a perfect human being and yeeted you into the universe. Thank you for always leaving such kind messages and words in my DM/askbox/works. I cherish them so much. I hope I can get to know you better in the future bc you’re rad, bro <3

anyways, updated drawing of u and maya:

i always assume you’re in a black fur parka 24/7 and maya is coatless neck down. also deck me with those jacked arms of yours thanks  🧍‍♀️

(edit: fuck i forgot to draw a PARTY HAT ON MAYA IM SORRY)

@rokuseis​, Sei, the Dumber.

i have nothing to say to you go away you banana hater ASELKSAEKL

BITCH, you doo bee getting on my nerve 24/7/365 🧍‍♀️ you were an unexpected but a very welcomed addition to my life. I can’t believe we really went 1 fuckin’ year without speaking to each other and then suddenly our friendship blew up because over a stupid BANANA. Now you gotta deal with me and my stupid, random, crude ass messages daily. I cannot. Clown to clown communication. But thank you so much bitch for being there for me and telling all of these funny ass stories and life experiences.

I know I don’t say it a lot because when we talk it’s literally just dogs barking at each other but I want to make it clear now: I love your humor and vibe so much. You never fail to make me laugh anytime I talk to you and I appreciate it so much. I can’t tell you how many times I felt better after talking to you. Even though sometimes your fucking jab hits hard and I end up actually inSULTED BY IT. But thank you for becoming my friend and I look forward to all of our stupid moments together. Looking forward to shitting in your sink when I finally fly to your home <3

@wolfamongthem, Anna, the Grinch. Please don’t hurt me for that title. I'm just saying if someone needs a live casting, it’ll be u. Anyways, did you know that I was so fucking intimidated by you for a long ass time, even before we became mutuals aseljas LMAO. I always see your gifs around on explore and they’re so gorgeous and then I look at your text posts and it’s u roasting people like there’s no tomorrow- 🧍‍♀️ bitch I was SCARED OF U KSKS. Now that I’ve talked to you a few times, you’re really funny like where do you find those reaction memes????? Like bro you and your shitposts is my morning cup of coffee. 

Anyways, in 2021 I expect a full-fledge review of all AAA games from you-- no more shit talking in the tags let it all out BITCH. Thank you for being such a great mutual! I look forward to see what weird shit you will send me the next time we talk lmao

@zenien​​, Selm, the I’m-gay-for-Lady-Maria-or-anything-that-moves-in-BB-Bitch™. ok bitch if I’m being honest I wrote yours last so my brain is FRIED. so everything i say from here is raw from the HEARt cause that’s all I got left. But anyhow, we savin’ the best for last! honestly, i didn’t expect you to barge into my life like that. i really didn’t. i was just gonna keep admiring with my 7 feet (2.1336 meters) pole. I’m glad you made the first move because look where we are wtf 🧍‍♀️ friends??? I wouldn’t believe you if you told me that in 2014 when I first followed you lmao. 

You’re such a kind soul. I know you may disagree but I’m determined to convince you. I can’t tell you how much I want to thank you for taking the time to talk to me during my rough bits. It’s like sitting on a wooden bench in a park during sunset and you sit next to me, just enjoying the vast sky. You radiate such peaceful energy. It’s very calming. Or you know, 2 seconds later i’m suddenly suplexed by your 40 tons of insults like what-- 

Thank you for everything, so far. Truly. It’s been so fun listening to you talk about your Bloodborne journey and see your reactions live. It’s been so fun to see you post your graphics and it continues to blow me away. It’s been so fun hearing about your life and the stories of your adulthood. Every words that we have exchanged, I hold dearly to my heart--more than you ever know. Love u bitch.

[if-found-return-to-gusu]

Smoke and Soot

Things were tense. I made them tense. After the fire it was just…. 

I guess I’m just shit at handling stress? I used to think I was pretty good at dealing with stress but I’m starting to realize that I only thought that because I… wasn’t dealing with it.

My biggest problem… Well… One of my biggest problems… I don’t know… That is.

Urgh.

Okay

So my greatest goal in life is to be as small of an inconvenience as possible, apparently. I’ve been thinking about it this past couple weeks and it… informs like 90% of what I do. Especially when I’m stressed I guess. Or… indebted…. And compounding on that, I view every kindness as a debt I should repay. Everything is owed and nothing is free. And while I pay it back I will try not to incur more debt. Don’t be an inconvenience. Don’t take up space. 

I… I don’t think it’s all because of how I was raised with the Jiangs because I was like that from the beginning… I don’t know what happened to me before then. As I mentioned before, I don’t remember. But I think sometimes I kinda… remember the feelings?

I mean it’s obvious that there are conditions from before that still affect me now. I have some scars on my leg and my arm - old and faded now. The one on my leg is clearer. Bite marks. At some point an animal attacked me. Dogs. I don’t remember the event but I still have the results. I’m terrified of them. Dogs. I can’t… I freeze and tremble. So I know the bites are from dogs. Even if I can’t remember the attack. But I have the scars. Both mental and physical. 

And I wonder how many other scars, ones that I can’t see, really inform why I am the way I am. 

Anyway. Not the point. I’m still opening the doors. The doors to my own problems that I kept sealed shut. I’ve had to dig up some keys. Forage through the brush to find them. Some keys have to be re-made. But I’m trying. 

Not the point. 

But anyway. I don’t know the why but I know the result. And the result is I don’t want to take up space. 

And when I started living with Lan Zhan, that instinct kicked into overdrive. Like insane overdrive. 

I think part of it was that I didn’t want to be a bother. I wanted it to be as life as usual for Lan Zhan. So I wouldn’t disrupt his life. He was doing so much for me by taking me in. By taking care of me. It felt like the least I could do to pay that back.  

I know the flaw in that thinking. You have told me. Lan Zhan has told me. Wen Qing has told me. Everyone has told me. I get it. I get that the way of thinking is wrong. But I can’t help it. It’s how I think.

And I’ve gotten better. Especially where Lan Zhan is concerned. 

BUt this was different. It was too much for me to really understand that there is no cost attached to it.

And I did NOT want that cost to be Lan Zhan. I didn’t want to lose him. I DON’T want to lose him. I…

Anyway.

The way this came out was with cleaning. Cleaning everything. I’ve mentioned before that Lan Zhan’s home is spotless. And I know that he prefers cleanliness. On my own I was… not clean. I mean not a pig sty but like my apartment was definitely lived in. There always seemed to be a couple dishes in the sink and some clothes strewn about waiting to be put away. Or art supplies or what have you. 

But Lan Zhan… Lan Zhan is clean. He’s tidy. He puts things away when he’s done with them. He has a cleaning schedule. Like dusting and sweeping and mopping and like all that. And… I don’t know… I didn’t want to disrupt that. I didn’t want to make him clean up after me or like ruin his flow or whatever. 

That was part of it. 

A large part. 

But the other part…. Sometimes even now….

I can smell the smoke on my skin. I can smell it on the things I’ve touched. Left behind like a stain. And… And I know it’s in my head. But it… doesn’t make it any less real to me.

I couldn’t stand the smell of the smoke. And I was afraid that… I don’t know that it’d tainted the things I’d touched. That Lan Zhan could smell it. That he’d resent me for it. That he’d want me to leave. To get away. To stop contaminating his home with my smoke.

……

Thinking about it now…. Maybe I’ve felt that way from before the fire… I’m a contaminant. A stain. Tarnish that needs to be buffed and polished away. 

Huh….

Well…. Well anyway. Where was I. yeah. Okay.

So the reasons were there. The reasons were complicated. The reasons are STILL there and Still complicated. But the result was simple.

If I didn’t want to spoil things or stain them I just had to clean. 

Everything.

Constantly. 

I needed to scrub away the smoke. Especially… Especially in that spot.  

If I think about it even now I can feel it. Smell it. Taste it. It burns my nose. Burns my eyes. Everywhere. The smoke was worse than the heat even. It was just… I couldn’t breathe. Truly couldn’t breathe. Even as I drew breath. 

I… really never want to experience that again. 

But I think…. Also the smoke might be a good thing? Because the fact that I can still smell it means I have to face it. I maybe am not dealing with it in the BEST way but at least I’m dealing with it. I’m not hiding from it and running anymore. 

Which is new for me. 

But… okay enough of my psychoanalyzing myself. That doesn’t really have to do with… the story? I guess?

What happened.

So I was cleaning. You know this. I know this. Lan Zhan DEFINITELY knows this. 

At first it was just that spot. But as the smell spread so did my cleaning. 

Like… I never left Lan Zhan’s place a mess, but like on our Saturdates I wouldn’t clean up immediately either. Like at the end of the day we’d pick up together. It was like a joint thing.

And when it was just a day or two for a few hours or whatever. Idk… it was fine. It was different. But now that I’m living here, always, 24/7 this is where I legit reside, I don’t know it was just not the same. He was doing me such a huge favor and I KNOW it had to inconvenience him. And it was temporary, but I didn’t want him to hate me at the end of it. 

I didn’t want to derail his life. So I just… cleaned everything… right away. Always. 

I think I went through a full bottle and a half of cleaner the first few weeks I was there. And soon that smell of smoke was replaced by chemicals. 

Not. Better.

But I didn’t know what to do. I tried changing cleaners but that just made it worse.

But like I couldn’t stop. And I guess I didn’t realize how bad it was until Christmas Eve. And that was because Lan Zhan literally told me to stop. 

I was home alone. Lan Zhan had gone out to get some supplies for SangSang’s party. And the smell came back. The smoke. From that spot. 

It was… Normally it came back at night and it had lessened since I started sleeping in Lan Zhan’s room again. It’s hard to smell smoke when the sandalwood scent of his skin is just right there.

But the smoke always gets worse when I’m alone. Or it did…. Does? Less so now.

Ugh. I’m sorry it’s hard to get my thoughts in order on this. But anyway

The smell came back. Almost as bad as the first time. From the place I’d hid when I arrived after the fire. And so I started to clean it again. My hands were raw and it burned so bad but I couldn’t stop scrubbing. And scrubbing. And scrubbing. And scrubbing. And scrubbing. And---

 Okay enough you get the point. 

I’d meant to just clean it and move on but… I don’t know. I couldn’t stop or lost track of time or both I guess. But all of a sudden Lan Zhan was there. 

I don’t think I’ve felt shame flood through my body quite so quickly as that before. I don’t even know why I was ashamed really. Like I guess on some level I knew I was being ridiculous. That it wasn’t necessary. That I was going too far in an unneeded extreme. I didn’t want Lan Zhan to know, but of course he knew. I’d seen him lighting more incense around the house to cover up the smell I’d left in my wake. 

In trying to avoid the problem I had caused the problem I’d been trying to avoid.

Par for the course. Good Job Wei Ying. :/

I didn’t even hear him come home. I didn’t see  him approach me. I didn’t realize he was there at all until I heard him call out to me and ask what I was doing.

I panicked then, which of course meant I gave him a big ol’ grin. (these grins never seem to work on him anymore. He knows me too well. Still, can’t help it.)

“Nothing!” I said, sounding WAY too cheerful even to my own ears. “Just cleaning!”

He pointed out that we had both already cleaned the night before. Or like the previous night? I don’t remember. Anyway we had just cleaned. Like normal cleaning. His routine. I helped. 

But what could I do? I couldn’t admit I’d been cleaning religiously for weeks. I couldn’t admit that my hands were burned and cracked and not healing from the fire because of the scrubbing and the chemicals and just… everything. I couldn’t say that I felt so ashamed of being a soot mark against his life that I was trying desperately with everything I had to rub it clean. To rub myself clean.

I couldn’t admit even to myself what that really meant. I wasn’t something with soot on it. I was the soot. And if you rub out the soot, there is no more soot. I wanted to rub myself out. I wanted to erase myself. 

I’ve wanted to erase myself for a long time, I think. 

Not that I wanted to die. I just wanted… 

I don’t know what I wanted. To not exist to begin with? Or just not as I am. Do… I want to be someone else? Or do I just want to be a better version of myself.

Because not all of me is bad. Sometimes I’m so arrogant. And cocky. And other times I just want to beat the shit out of myself.

But not all of me is bad. 

Ugh…. self-identity and shit is just too complicated. Can we please just become ferrets? Ferrets seem cool. Let’s just be ferrets. When’s the last time a ferret had an identity crisis? Never! Because they’re ferrets.

Anyway.

I been caught. Lan Zhan could see where I was and what I was doing. He’s not stupid. 

He took the cleaning stuff out of my hands and asked me what was really going on. Because obviously? Right? 

So what could I do but admit to everything I just rambled on about not being able to admit to. Because when push comes to shove I can’t hide anything from this man. Not really. 

So I told him… maybe not in so many words. But I told him that I know he cares about being clean. And that I didn’t want him to be upset to not living to that standard. That I didn’t want to inconvenience him. 

He told me that he could never be upset with me. (Which isn’t true because he was upset with me trying not to make him upset but that’s dangerously close to a paradox so I’ll let it slide.)

He told me.

He said…..

He told me that he LIKES who I am. 

And I could feel the weight of those words. It’s just…. I really believe that he meant to like… like the CORE of me. He LIKES who I am. He likes ME. 

He has seen me. He’s seen me at my best and my worst. He’s dealt with it. My family drama. My fire. He’s been dragged into it all. And he has seen to the very depth of my soul. 

And he’s decided that he likes it. That me. That core. He still likes me. 

I don’t.. I can’t imagine why… but he does. And I believe him. 

He took my hands (I had to try VERY hard not to wince because fuck they hurt.) and he pulled me so carefully to the couch. 

And he sat down next to me.

And we talked. Well…. He talked. For once I was quiet (mostly) and just listened. 

He told me about his uncle and how he was brought up in such a strict way. He told me that while he can’t change his own habits it’s just that- habits. Not expectations. And he very pointedly does NOT want house rules. After growing up with so many strict rules and punishments for breaking them. That isn’t what home should mean, he said.  And so in his own home there were no such rules. 

And then he said…

He said

That he wants to see the evidence that I was there. That he wants to come home and see traces of me. 

And… I mean… Okay so I’d spent so long trying so hard to not leave a trace of myself, that I had never CONSIDERED that maybe he wanted to see those traces. 

He mentioned that it was proof that… that the worst hadn’t happened.  He… Apparently I really scared him. Or rather the thought of what COULD have happened scared him. 

“This is your home too,” he said. “As long as you want it, it will be yours.”

I avoided jokes this time, though the urge was there. I was afraid of what he’d say if I said “Well then I guess you’re stuck with me forever then.”

But I don’t think I could have spoken anyway with the lump that had formed in my throat. So instead I threw myself at him. And he accepted me. He held me so close. 

After a moment I managed to swallow that lump to tell him he was too good to me. Because he is. But he said that I deserve all the good. 

Which made me laugh… but somehow.. It wasn’t that I didn’t believe him. I just… Hearing those words. From him. It was a release I hadn’t known I needed. So I laughed and just… held on to him. 

He let me. He’s so patient. Always waiting for me. 

So, I decided to share a bit more. It took a minute. With the words came the smoke. And once I said them he’d have to breathe it in. 

But I did. Because… Lan Zhan wanted to share the burden with me. And I’m… I’m starting to be willing to let him. 

I told him that I didn’t want to be a burden. 

He shook his head, and I think he was going to say something else, but I kept going. 

I breathed in deep. Smoke. I breathed out. Smoke. But he let me talk. 

I told him about it. THe smoke. The smell. How it follows me. Everywhere I go. Everything I touch. Contaminated by smoke. I told him how it was especially strong in the corner where he’d found me. 

And then this jackass absolute angel fucking specimine of a man just said that we should rearrange the room then. 

Break away the association. 

I tried to tell him that we couldn’t do that! The living room was how he wanted it and rearranging his life was specifically the thing I’d been trying to AVOID. 

And so he JUST DEADLIFTED THE END OF THE COUCH WITH ME ON IT AND JUST STARTED MOVING IT!

WHAT THE HELL……..???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

FUCK.

I mean I was too devastated at the time to be horny but now??

Okay anyway. 

So since it clearly didn’t matter what I had to say about it at that point, I decided I could at least help. 

So we moved the room around. It didn’t take that long actually and the end result is actually rather nice. It ended up opening the living room up a bit more. And… 

The selfish part of my heart….

It’s ours. Our living room. It’s arranged how WE want it. Because he asked for my input. And we’d try it. And if WE didn’t like it WE moved it again. Until it was how WE liked it. 

And oh…. Oh…. We. 

I like we.

And… I think we… WE might…. There’s a real chance…

We…

He asked me how it was after we finished. I breathed in deep. And smelled only Sandalwood. 

“Better.”

He smiled at me and… The taste of smoke was replaced by the memory of the taste of him. That kiss that never should have happened. I just… I wanted nothing more than to repeat what had happened. I wanted him to press me into that couch and not let me up. I wanted…. 

You don’t need to hear my sick fantasies. You get the point. 

I really really wanted to kiss him. And kiss him. And KISS him. 

And… uh… well… turns out that my wish didn’t take TOO long to be granted actually…. 

Mmm…. maybe I should say this in order though. Because it happened at the party. And it was…. Well….. It wasn’t a KISS really. Like a KISS KISS. but it was still a kiss. And just… The longing hadn’t gone away. It hadn’t even dimmed since that first kiss that never should have happened. But this… this just made it 1000 times stronger. (I’m writing about Christmas now but it’s getting late. So I’ll just post this for now and finish the rest later)