#i don't like that and i rather like guys who have their interests/passions and who don't need to flex so much

[anitalianfrie]

Hi hi I’m relatively new to MotoGP so I don’t know if you maybe made a post about this before already but! What’s the accent variety like in the Italian lads? Bc I learnt Italian for a year and I loooveee love picking apart accents and silly lil language things but I’m just not used enough to spoken Italian to identify any variation from the standard. I’ve been told tho that Bez has a notable accent but do any of the others as well?🤔

accents ask accents ask stay calm! (sorry i am. very passionate about accents) also disclaimer: i am very much not an expert! i'm just having fun here

okay so, all the italian riders (that are important to me) come from one of these three places: Emilia-Romagna, more specifically Romagna, even more specifically near Rimini*; Lazio, more specifically from Rome; Piemonte, more specifically from around Turin.

*only exception is dovi who was born a leedle more in the inland. but only a leedle.

Here's a map where I have circled the zones of interest

(yes the circle around Turin is enormous it's because I'm not searching on google maps the minuscule ass place cele lived in)

You can hear the Romagnolo accent in Bez, Vale, Enea, Luca, Dovi, Mig, with various degree of intensity. Luca is probably the one with the less strong accent, but it's still very identifiable. There are of course still some differences in the way they speak (i noticed that for some reason Vale tends to open his e more than bez, sometimes making a ⟨ɛ⟩ sound rather than a ⟨e̞⟩ sound). Their accent is caractherized mainly by the way they say the s, the z and the c, that they tend to almost hiss. Here's an example of Bez saying his surname, and somebody from another region saying it. (first the person with the other accent, then bez)

In the audio you can also hear the e thing i was talking about: in Romagna they tend to close it more then they do in some other places in the north (for example the other guy is from Lombardia)

Between all of them, Bez's accent is probably the strongest. I once said that hearing him talk feels like being slapped in the face by a piadina, and I will repeat it.

Both Franco and Diggia are from Rome, but to be honest, Franky's accent is almost unperceptible. Really difficult to clock. Diggia has a stardard Rome accent, but not that strong. People from Rome have a very distinct accent (and also probably one of the easiest to do) characterized by the frequent use of dialectal terms. You can hear it for example in the c and g, that tend to be a bit more guttural, and the l tends to become a r. Also, due to the dialect thing, they tend to cut the verbs: for example fare becomes fa', andare becomes anda'.

For the Piemontese accent, we encounter a slight problem: I am also from Piemonte, and therefore it's harder for me to clock how strong the accent is. The main thing that you can hear about this accent is the o, that tends to become more of a ou. Prime example in this baby cele clip, when he says 'porte'. Adorable. Also, around Turin they tend to close the e (while we, from the secret location i'm blogging from, tend to open them). People from Piemonte also tend to say 'neh' a lot, but I don't have clips of Cele saying it because it's quite informal. I might try do to a deep dive later. And I can't say much more about this accent because as I said, I can't really hear it.

You might have noticed that pecco is nowhere to be found in the list up until now. That's because his accent INFURIATES me. He's from Piemonte but doesn't have the accent, and instead has a slight Romagnolo accent. Here's a clip from this year's Sanremo that made me cry in pain.

Another thing you might have noticed is that the guys from the northen regions (Emilia-Romagna and Piemonte) will frequently put an article in front of people's names, even if grammatically incorrect. Il Cele. Il Bez. Il Pecco. L'Enea. Il Vale. We just do that. You will not catch Diggia ever saying it, because people from the centre and south of italy just don't. do it.

I hope this was somewhat idk. interesting? useful? if you have some more questions do ask i love to talk about these things

[butterflysonnets]

yes i'm rooting for m*leven breakup because byler is neat but mostly? i'm rooting for m*leven breakup for the sake of el and mike.

to me, their romance was always a puppy love born out of a combination of social pressures, naïve curiosity, and a lack of true understanding regarding intimacy and romantic love and what it really is. it was real in that they do truly, deeply care about each other and they are close friends, maybe even shared an attraction, but a maturing romance is so much more than that. they've grown up and out of being boyfriend/girlfriend, and that's okay! i think television/film needs to show more often that most of us don't have definite "soulmates" or first childhood loves that we spend our whole lives with. it doesn't mean these relationships meant nothing and didn't impact us, it just means they've run their course and that something else is in the cards, and this is part of life!

i've always felt el was at her best and most confident self when broken up with mike, discovering who she was and what she liked alongside another girl her age instead of just relying on mike for mentorship on how to live in the real world. she deserves more of an opportunity to find herself, her autonomy, and her independence, and to love who she is, and she's made it clear she's felt insecure in the relationship with mike because she isn't being loved and understood the way she wants, needs, and deserves from someone who is her partner.

also, it's okay if mike doesn't love her in "the way he should". he is not obligated to love her romantically and stay in a relationship with her just because she's a girl, because she "needed someone", or because he cares about her a lot. he shouldn't be pressured into a romance if it's not truly coming from his heart. he deserves freedom to find out and honour who he is, too, instead of just staying in his non-functional first relationship — one he got into as a child, essentially — and defining himself that way because it's what's expected when a boy and a girl are close. he loves her in some way, yes, but it's okay if he doesn't feel comfortable or secure being her boyfriend anymore, for whatever reason that is. he's felt insecure too, and that's valid and it matters.

they are their own people and are steadily growing and changing every day. they need time to figure out who those people are, and it's become clear (at least in my opinion) that those people aren't meant to be a couple at this stage.

they deserve freedom. they deserve to grow up and be authentic to themselves and not feel like they need to lie for the sake of a relationship. they deserve to move on from this version of their relationship that isn't making them happy and rekindle the best part of their bond: their strong, beautiful friendship. they don't have to be a couple if it doesn't make them stronger and better and happier people.

i think it would be healthy and wonderful for a show, especially one consumed frequently by young adults, to show a relationship starting, progressing, and ending on good terms in this way. sometimes things don't work out, and that is okay.

[4ngel-inc]

࿔*:･ 𝐁𝐔𝐍𝐆𝐎 𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐘 𝐃𝐎𝐆𝐒 — 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐘 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐊 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐇𝐀𝐕𝐄 𝐀 𝐂𝐑𝐔𝐒𝐇 𝐎𝐍 𝐒𝐎𝐌𝐄𝐎𝐍𝐄 𝐄𝐋𝐒𝐄 ࿐

tags — [ MDNI / 18+ ], fem reader, a little angsty but all with happy endings, fluff but suggestive & some dirty talk !! ᰔ

𝐃𝐀𝐙𝐀𝐈 feels a knife in his chest when he sees you hugging someone else—he knows the two of you have only been dating a short time, but in his mind, you're the one. he wants you forever, but now you've gone and fallen for someone else. he immediately contemplates killing the other person, but he decides against it—that was his past self, he's changed now. it takes a lot for him to be completely vulnerable around you at first, so it's difficult expressing that he's jealous. "bella, are you still happy with me?" he hates the slight quiver in his voice, but he needs to know. "huh? 'f course i am, osamu, why'd you ask me that?" you pull him in for a soft kiss, just lips touching gently, before pulling away, "something bothering you?" before he can even bring up the other guy, he realizes how silly he's been, shaking himself out of his own self-loathing—"ah, nothing, just wanted to make sure. wanna go out for a coffee or something? you look so pretty today, i'm sure i'm not the only one who noticed. i want to show you off, angel." you roll your eyes, so that's it. "you think someone else thinks i'm pretty?" there's a long pause, but you know what he's thinking, "babe, he's just a friend. you're my everything, y'know that, right?" he sighs, pulling you into his lap, "you figured me out, huh? i can never hide around you, why is that?" he seems to be asking himself rather than you, but you answer anyways, "because i love you, and you love me—our hearts are tied together, i always know what you're thinking, like now," you reach down to stroke him through his pants, pleased to find him already hard, "why don't i remind you how much i love you, huh?"

𝐂𝐇𝐔𝐔𝐘𝐀 tries to look away when he sees you talking to another guy at a party the mafia is having, disgusted by the way the man smiles at you so slyly, clearly interested in you—but you've always been so adorably oblivious to how other people look at you with such admiration and lust, completely unaware of your own beauty. he's used to others flirting with you, but what is surprising is that you seem to be quite interested in the conversation, despite the way the man is slowly moving closer to you with each passing second. are you into him? no, you couldn't be—chuuya is your everything, you've told him as much many times, and though he's never been one to surrender to insecurity, after working for the mafia for so many years, he doesn't really trust anyone except you. it isn't long before he's approaching you, and though he wants to wrap his arm around your waist and pull you in, he hesitates. "everything alright?" "oh, chuuya! yes, everything's great. [name] here was just telling me about his most recent mission, it's quite fascinating." when he gets a bit closer, chuuya realizes he recognizes the man, and gently tugs on your arm, "come on, love, let's go." you're a little surprised but follow him anyways, waving goodbye to your new acquaintance. "chuuya? what's wrong?" your heels click on the floor quickly before chuuya presses your back into a hidden corner of the room, kissing you deeply and passionately. you're breathless when he pulls away, "that guy's a scumbag, you deserve better." you're utterly confused at his words—you've always been chuuya's—but your thoughts escape you when his lips are on yours again, and you choose not to question it, gently tugging at his belt before suggesting the two of you retire to your room for the evening. "i'm not sure what's bothering you, but i'll fix it, babe."

𝐀𝐊𝐔𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐀𝐖𝐀 hates himself for it, but he's a little jealous when you rave about your new favorite anime character. he's your background on your phone and the inspiration for a few plushies on your bed, and though he doesn't feel threatened, he wishes your attention was on him instead. the last thing he wants is to be controlling—it just isn't in his nature—he loves that you have hobbies you enjoy so much! but you've been distracted lately, and he's been missing your sweet kisses and cuddles. he never thought he'd find himself growing so soft, he has such a weakness for you that makes him nervous, but he's been so busy and stressed about work lately—your pretty eyes locked with his as you snuggle up against him, looking up at him and running your hand through his hair with all the love in the world in your eyes, would be a salve to all of his worries. it isn't really a decision when he brings it up, it just comes out one day, "would you be open to me watching this show with you? i'd like to be a part of this new interest of yours, since it makes you. . . so happy." you easily detect the discouraged tone in his voice, and click the tv off. "c'mere, ryu, what's wrong?" "nothing," he states matter-of-factly, but you understand the implication behind his tone—he's been lonely. "why don't we spend the day together?" you run your fingers through his hair, "your hair's a little messy, want me to cut it for you? i'll make you dinner, too, what are you in the mood for?" his heart swells at your offer, "i'd really enjoy that, i've missed you lately. i've been working too much, but i'm glad you've been keeping busy."

𝐒𝐈𝐆𝐌𝐀 always thought you were his—from the moment you told him you'd be his girlfriend, you were his greatest treasure, he told himself he'd never do anything to lose you. but when he sees you laughing and twirling your hair with a new guy, he can only assume that's the case. he must have done something wrong—worked too much, didn't tell you you're pretty enough, something. it seems like you're having fun with this new person—sigma tells himself he never made you smile that way, doesn't make you laugh as hard, and he's ashamed of that. when you two crawl into bed later that night, you notice sigma doesn't seem as cuddly or affectionate as usual. "baby? something wrong?" he frowns, but shakes his head 'no' anyways. "i'm fine, just tired." you aren't buying it, and when he wraps the blanket around himself, his body laid on the edge of the bed, as far away from you as possible, you need to know—he's your sweetest love, you can't bear the thought of him suffering. you sit up and flick on the light, "baby, please talk to me. did i do something?" he sighs, but eventually decides to open up to you, and you're happy to tell him your "new guy" is only a friend—sigma is the one you really want, and truthfully, he's a little embarrassed he thought otherwise. "i'm sorry, love, i guess i'm just insecure." you brush your fingers over his cheek, "you're not insecure, sweetie, you just love me—and i love you, just as much. i'm never letting you go, you're everything i've ever wanted." he smiles and finally snuggles into you, "thank you for loving me, i don't deserve you."

[churipu]

omg hi! can i request jjk men with a girlfriend who loves acting! she goes to a drama club and all that (๑>◡<๑)

thanks I love all your posts (๑❛ᴗ❛๑)

JJK MEN AND A GIRLFRIEND WHO LOVES ACTING 𓏲 ๋࣭  ࣪ ˖

featuring. gojo satoru, nanami kento, toji fushiguro x fem! reader

warning. gojo being dramatic

note. hi nonnieee :< sorry for the late update on this, and i appreciate you saying that, it means so much to me <33 i hope you like this one! and believe it or not, i'm like — sick again??? i don't get it, i swear i was just fine an hour before and now i'm sneezing like five times after every ten minutes. pls save me. okay and ngl, this gave me ideas of musical actor! gojo and reader.

GOJO SATORU. he will absolutely be thrilled, and he is your number one fan. he gets very giddy when you tell him that you'll have a performance — but gets upset when he realizes that your character has a love interest (who isn't him).

but gojo doesn't try to ask you to switch or quit, because he knows this is just acting. as much as he hates to see other people touch you intimately, even for an act; the male knows how much acting means to you. it's your dream to perform for people for gosh sake.

gojo will make sure he gets the front row seats to be able to see you act. and the male drops by your practice to see how you were holding up, and sometimes, he helps you by going over the script together. the male finds your acting very very delightful, there's this flutter in him whenever he sees his girlfriend performing on stage.

proud, euphoria, love. everything all at once. he cheers the loudest when the performance ends, giving a loud clap and telling people beside him that you're his girlfriend. as soon, as people starts leaving the theatre, he finds you and tells you how proud he is of you.

as the rowdy theatre soon turns empty, gojo and you would spend some time performing the same act. where this time, he's your love interest — performing rather perfectly since he knew the script from going over it with you before.

"this 's the part where you jump into my arms and i twirl you, right, princess?" he asks, taking off his suit, tossing it aside so he could move better.

you nodded, "ready, 'toru?"

"'m always ready for you, baby," he opened his arms towards you and you laugh freely, throwing yourself onto him.

the male wrapped his strong arms around your waist and twirled you around on the stage inside the empty theatre, both of your laughs echoing in the large room. it's always a routine to end the day like that after every performance of yours.

"maybe i should consider acting, hm? so i could be your love interest instead of some . . . guy." he murmurs into your neck as he puts you down onto the ground gently.

"you could try, baby. i'd be glad to act with you."

gojo tries out, and he miraculously landed an act after his first audition (and he gets to be your love interest).

NANAMI KENTO. doesn't like crowds. but when it comes to your performances — he'd push that aside, because it isn't about him, it's about you. he promises to watch you, and he kept his words.

the first time he finds out about your passion for acting was when he sees you go over a script on your third date with him. of course he wanted to know what you were doing, and when he finds out that you were going to be performing for an act, he was astonished. he just needed to be there to see you.

believe it or not. nanami even went out of his way to cancel a meeting to go watch your show, and the first time he saw you live on act. he just gets so entranced by the way you move and act on stage — how you stayed on character despite the constant eye contacts he had with you during the play.

and after that, he always comes to see your performances; it never stopped even after you both started dating. he's always there, a flower bouquet sitting on his lap as he intently watches you perform with such elegance and professionalism. sometimes nanami wondered why you haven't tried out to be an actor on tv yet.

"kento, how did i do?" you'd ask him after every performance, sweat dribbling down the side of your head and the male wipes it with his bare fingers.

"amazing. as always. i'm proud of you," he slipped the bouquet into your arms and pressed a brief kiss onto your forehead, "you look beautiful."

nanami makes sure to pamper you after your performance, helping you clean the make up off — spoiling you with the best food, snacks, and anything you want. and when you tell him that it's too much to spend on you, he insisted on it. nanami won't even regret spending much on you.

TOJI FUSHIGURO. the first time he met you was from a cliche fiction type of bump, drop things, apologize and picking up. right outside a theatre where you were practicing a few days before the big performance, toji picked up your script and he asked you if you act — and you said yes.

an odd thing to say, but he admitted that he'd be watching and he's interested on it since it would be his first time watching an act (he didn't have a ticket, he just said that so he could actually come see you act).

and when you told him you'd be happy to see him on the big day — toji was internally telling himself that he screwed up big time since he didn't have a ticket. that day, the both of you exchanged numbers and got to know each other through exchanges of messages.

toji tries hard to find an available ticket, and was so happy when he got one (even if he didn't, i swear he'd force himself inside the theatre to see you). and front row too nonetheless. he tells you about where he was going to be sitting and that he has high hopes from you as a joke.

and when you finished the performance, honestly, he didn't know what to say. frankly, he finds acting a bit boring — but with you on stage, his eyes were intent. every single time you popped onto stage, he finds himself stupidly smiling.

even after you both started dating, he'd always come to your performances. even if he didn't get a ticket, he lies to you and tells you that he's coming — which he did, by letting out some meaningless threats to the security guarding outside.

"hah, knew y'were gonna be great, doll." he approaches you as you were wiping off the eyeshadow gently, and you chuckled, "y'look hot in that dress."

"oh, hush. how did you get in here? this is an actors and actresses only zone," you tell him, not even bothering to kick him out because he'll probably find himself back in anyways.

"i have ways," he stood behind you, watching the mirror, specifically at your reflection. the way your lips parted slightly at every brush of the dirty cotton onto your skin.

he's proud of you. but wouldn't tell you with words, but he will give you a kiss or two to tell you that he is indeed proud of you.

© CHURIPU 2024 , DO NOT COPY OR REPOST ANYWHERE

[tarotwithavi]

What will draw your future spouse to you?

1-2-3

Masterlist

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How to choose a pile?

Take a deep breath and close your eyes. Kindly ask your spirit guides to show you the right pile for yourself and then open your eyes. Whichever pile catches your attention is the right pile for you.

Pile 1

Hey pile 1! I'm getting that you guys don't really allow negative feedback from people to get to you and you move on from things really easily. You are not afraid to let go of things. I am also getting that you really try to evolve yourself and let go of the old habits that do not serve you anymore. You guys are also very in tune with your emotions and you are not afraid to be vulnerable. If something hurts you , you are not afraid to talk about it to the person who did that rather than locking your emotions away and blaming yourself. You guys really know how to invest your money in the right place. You guys might be into saving or you don't spend money impulsively. You guys know how to manage your finances. I am also getting that there is a sense of competitiveness inside you, and you don't like defeat. If you really like someone or something you are not afraid to fight for them and that will draw your future spouse to you. You guys might have the mentality of "I will for my lover doesn't matter if the whole world will turn against me" Or "I'll do my best so I don't have to regret later". You guys know when to let go of someone and when to fight for them. Your future spouse will admire this about you. I'm also getting that some of you may be obsessed with saving or investing your money into something that will double your money with time, like stocks or something. By the time you'll meet your future spouse you will accomplish a lot of things and still be humble, you're down to earth nature will attract your future spouse a lot.

Pile 2

Welcome Pile 2! Your ambition and passion for life will draw your future spouse to you. I'm also getting that some of you may love to travel or you guys may love to learn about different cultures. Your future spouse will love how understanding, respectful and humble you are. Another thing I am picking up on is that you guys are always looking forward to the positive side of life and you guys are not afraid to try new things. I am also wearing that some of you may like swimming or spending time by the beach. You guys have great patience and you are willing to wait for them. Your future spouse may be working by the time you meet them so They will want to focus on their career and they won't be working. You will still be very patient with them and you will not Rush them into doing things that they don't want to do. You will be willing to wait for them and that is what they will admire the most about you. For some of you I am getting that you guys may have a very interesting personality or you guys know about a lot of things and your future spouse is someone who is very attracted to intelligent people. I am also getting that you guys don't show your cards at once and you guys have a lot of interesting aspects to you. Your future spouse will not be able to put you in a certain box because they will always be finding new things about you and you will always keep them wondering about you. There is also something very pure about you. I am getting that you guys are waiting for marriage and won't lose your V card before marriage. Your future spouse will think of you as a pure soul and want to protect you.

Pile 3

Hello pile 3! The first thing I channel there is that you might be very seductive to your future spouse. You may not be a very sexual person but it's just your energy. There is a very alluring and mysterious vibe to you. I am also getting that you are your future spouse's Ideal type. They have always wanted someone just like you and you are like a dream come true for them. I'm also getting that there is no way that they will let you go because your future spouse is very much obsessed with you but not in a negative way. Yours pose Mein seed and thousand you and I am also get in that you bring back memories of their childhood and you give them your nostalgia. Your future spouse is going to feel an instant connection with you and they might feel as if they have known you for a very long time. Or it could be that you have already met your future spouse. You guys are very understanding and no matter how your future spouse will act you will always teach them the right things and help them evolve. Now I'm also getting that your future spouse sees you as someone who has made them a better person. Another message I'm picking upon is that your future spouse will be drawn towards you because of your nurturing and caring personality. They will like how you are always willing to help others and how you are always evolving yourself. This might sound cliche but your future spouse will think that you're not like others. They will like how in tune you are with your feminine side. Your future spouse will be drawn to you because they will think that you can bring stability into their life. And I'm not saying that they'll depend on you . They just see you as a perfect partner.

[mika-no-sekai-blog]

Wingspan

Word count: 4.4k

Warnings: Minors denied. Don't want me to write the list of all shameful things I wrote under the cut

Because I've spent whole week with sick 2 years old child, managed to get sick as well and I'm deprived of Azriel because last two months I'm writing only Heal me and as soon as he appeared on scene, this invaded my mind.. Honestly too many reasons to write something silly ⁄⁠(⁠⁄⁠ ⁠⁄⁠•⁠⁄⁠-⁠⁄⁠•⁠⁄⁠ ⁠⁄⁠)⁠⁄

"Okay, guys. You know why we are here," I started. "At first I'd like to thank you that you voluntarily signed up as subjects for this research."

"We compare our pricks whole life. It's our pleasure that somebody finally took it seriously and wants to write a whole book about it," Cassian teased, laughing hard.

Rhysand was trying really hard to keep a straight face the whole time, but after Cassian's comment he was about to lose it, and Azriel standing in the dark corner rather disappeared in his shadows after this comment.

How did I even get into this situation? Well, I knew how. It all happened because I was a passionate researcher. Too passionate for my own good.

It all started with mated Archeron sisters and Mor who wouldn't stop debating about this thing of a correlation of wingspan with the size of Illyrian male's private parts. It picked up my interest and I searched the entire library to find out more info about it. Utterly failing in the process, there wasn't a single mention. There wasn't even a proper documentation of their wings alone. So I took it upon myself to collect necessary data to confirm or deny truth of this rumour. I briefly mentioned it to Rhys hoping he could help me find enough subjects for the research. Which he did in surprisingly short time. And as if it wasn't enough he and his brothers signed up, too.

"That part I will leave to you. I hope I can count on you to deliver accurate numbers. If you try to cheat I'll have your mates to do it properly," I laughed, but I meant every single word.

"I'm sure Nes would be all for it," Cassian grinned proudly.

"As if Feyre wouldn't," Rhysand lost it. I had to laugh. I was afraid it would turn into something awkward, but with these two it was impossible. They were like kids, turning everything into a funny game.

I met Rhysand under the mountain. He witnessed the moment my ex betrayed me and when Feyre saved us all, he picked up my remains and brought me to Velaris to heal. In the end I decided to stay here. I buried love, lust and everything related to it as deep as possible and focussed on what I liked - research - occasionally helping inner circle.

"At least they certainly won't cheat," I smiled. "This research origins in their concern after all."

The three of us laughed so hard we cried. Only Azriel stayed silent hidden in his corner.

"And who will make sure Azriel doesn't cheat?" Cassian wondered.

"Why should I," Azriel stepped out from his hideaway, lowering a challenging gaze at me.

"I believe Azriel is the last one of three of you to use such dirty tricks to manipulate the results," I said, returning his gaze. "But if he does, I'll personally make sure he delivers true data."

His hazel eyes lit up with mischief and corners of his full lips slightly moved upward in a hardly there smirk. He wasn't so different from his brothers. More serious than these two? Certainly, but he could be playful, too.

"Okay, guys, let's get it done. Who is the first to show off the wingspan?"

This was the part I'd been looking forward the most. Illyrian wings, the most important subject of my research and to be honest, the main reason of this fuss. So sacred that sometimes even their lovers weren't allowed to touch them. Not that I could touch them by any mean. Boys only granted me to take measurements and a close look to make detailed sketches. Totally understandable given how sensitive they were.

All three of them took turns one in a time, helping me when my arms were too short. I took measurements of different parts of their bodies, too, just to be sure I have all I could possibly need to get accurate results. I wrote down numbers into my notebook, already amazed by the results.

"That's all for today. Thank you for your time. When can I expect the other data?"

"You can get them even right now, if you want, but I guess you don't want to see it, do you?" Cassian, always such a tease. I shook my head laughing.

"Would tomorrow morning be a soon enough for you?" Rhysand purred, flashing a smile. "Tonight we're going to have a lot of fun with Feyre."

"It would be perfect," I agreed. The sooner I was done here, the sooner I could go to camps to collect data from volunteers Rhysand had found for me.

Cassian and Rhysand left soon after, but ever-silent Azriel stayed behind.

He seemed to be so flustered and nervous while I was taking his measurements. Cassian was picking on him for that, but Azriel stoically ignored him and held still. It seemed he didn't even breathe. I knew he didn't like to be touched. It was the biggest of the surprises that he voluntarily signed up for this, so I was extra careful with him.

Ever since I met him, he was always very kind and considerate to me. However it took some time until he opened up. It's just few months since we started to hang out more. Not that I wouldn't like him. If I were honest, I would admit that he was very interesting person, I liked him a lot and he was so incredibly handsome. Too handsome to be real.

But that's exactly the way I wasn't suppose to think about him. I'm the type who falls easily and hard, and loves with all her being. That's why I was so devastated last time. Nobody could possibly love somebody like me. I'm unbearable in many ways.

Plus he is too high league for somebody like me. He can have anybody he wants and the line of prospects is long. Elain and Gwyn for example compete for his attention for years. Successfully. There's no way he would think of me that way. I shook my head to get rid of these self harming thoughts.

Turning I smiled at him encouragingly. Azriel cleared his throat, wings rustled behind his back. He did this often when he was nervous or uncomfortable.

"The camps.. are you planning to go there alone?" His deep voice always did this strange thing with my insides. And today was no different. I pushed the feeling aside, to the box of things I shouldn't think about and shut it closed.

"No, I believe last time Rhysand mentioned something about sending an escort. Mor is going with me, too."

"Okay," he nodded. His one word responses the were death of me. It was so hard to keep conversation going.

"Uhm.. So tomorrow? You don't have to hurry if it's inconvenient for you."

"Tomorrow is fine."

"Oh.. So.. uhm.. I'll see you tomorrow." Shadowsinger just nodded looking down at me a little longer than necessary and then finally he turned and left. I let out a long breath.

Next day Rhys came as the first one as soon as I entered my office. I guess he couldn't wait. Cassian stopped by as soon as the training with priestesses was over. I checked their results with their mates during the lunch break just to be sure the numbers are correct.

It was almost evening and Azriel was nowhere to be seen. I packed some of the stuff I needed to take to camps and took a look around. There was nothing else to keep me occupied, so I decided it's time to go home. I was about to open the door when a knock sounded. It was Azriel.

"You came," I greeted him with smile.

"Yeah, I'm sorry I couldn't come sooner. I was-"

"It's okay," I interrupted him. "You really don't need to apologise. I'm grateful you signed up for this."

He made a small noise and handed me a piece of folded paper. I took it and returned to my desk where I left the notebook with all data.

"Were you going to go home already?" he asked while I unfolded the paper.

"Yeah, you came just in time. One minute later and I would be gone." I looked at the number and froze. No way, this was certainly wrong. I compared it to the other numbers. Definitely wrong.

"Something's wrong?" he stepped closer, peeking down on me.

"What?" I was so immersed in my thoughts I didn't hear him. "Excuse me," I said boldly and reached for his crotch. Just to make things clear, I wasn't completely myself, otherwise I wouldn't dare to even think about doing so. In that very moment I was simply researcher and nothing else.

Azriel sharply inhaled, eyes widened, but he held still, blushing heavily.

"As I thought," I mumbled to myself releasing him. "Sweetheart, you were supposed to measure yourself when you are.. You know.. 'excited'. I really didn't think you would try to sabotage the research," I tried to joke to lighten his embarrassment. "With your .. equipment.. there's no reason for you to lose. I thought you are quite competitive."

He just silently looked to the side while the shadows danced around him as if trying to hide him.

"Or did you want me to help you with it?" I smiled teasingly. His head snapped up, hazel eyes finding mine. "Sit down there," I pointed to an armchair near the window. While he did as I asked him, I took a chair, placing it next to the armchair, facing the other side. I took the notebook, a towel and a tape measure I used the other day, and sat down on the chair.

I looked at him amused. From this angle I could see only his face and shoulders. "Go ahead. I won't look." With that I opened the notebook looking for the page, but he hadn't moved gazing up at me.

I smiled still leafing through pages. "Let me tell you a secret, okay? We have something in common, Az." I leaned closer to him as if it was really a secret I was about to reveal. "When I say I won't look, then I really won't do it." I looked straight into his eyes to make it clear that I meant it. "I can even measure you without seeing it. I don't need to touch you either. All I need is for this measure to touch you. That's all. So take your pants off and let me know when you are ready."

At this moment he was panting heavily, his pupils dilated. "Do you want me to chit chat you through it? Or do you prefer silence?" I added, arching a brow at him when he just sat there gazing. Finally he moved and I heard as his pants slid down. Azriel's gaze darkened, his eyes never leaving mine.

He swallowed, his broad chest heaving. "I'm ready" he rasped, his usually deep voice deepened even more. I'd be lying if I said it didn't effect me. Now it was my turn to blush.

I handed him the towel. "Cover yourself." I stood up slowly to give him enough time. I turned to him placing notebook on a small side table within arm's reach. I gasped when I looked down at him. My heart went crazy, running for marathon and I could only wish he didn't hear it.

Azriel sat in the armchair in full grace as if it was his throne, his bare legs with muscles on right places spread wide, towel crumpled in his fist. He grinned challengingly.

Okay, maybe we have more than one thing in common. I hate losing, too.

My mouth went dry and I was panting as heavily as Azriel. My head emptied. It took me every ounce of self-control to step between his legs, control my trembling hands and measure him. But I did it, I didn't break.

"Much better," I said coolly as I wrote results down. I collected my things, ready to leave.

"You want to leave me like this, Y/N?" Azriel growled lowly.

I made the mistake and looked into his beautiful eyes. I wasn't sure what I'd seen in them, but it dug out all forgotten feelings. As wave of lust washed over me I lost control over myself. I sat down on the armrest, my legs brushing his thigh lightly. I placed hands on his shoulders and leaned in.

"You are right. I should repay you," I whispered inches from him.

For a while Azriel watched me as a starved man. Slowly, very slowly he erased the distance between us, his soft lips colliding with mine. The moan that came out from his throat made me forget whatever happened after that.

When his fingers found a waistband of my pants and started unbuttoning them, it was like a cold shower. I broke the kiss, untangling my fingers from his silky dark strands. Eyes still closed, his lips followed after me. I squeezed his fingers in my hands and he looked up at me. I could see he wasn't pleased that I stopped him, but he didn't try to pressure me.

"This part of me is not on offer," I said calmly sending him a sad smile. There wasn't reason to be mad. It was my fault in the first place, I was the one to provoke him. "For you it might be just another one night stay that you forget all about very next morning, but I'm different." I stood up fixing my clothes. "I take male to bed only when I have feelings for him and vice versa." He frowned, ready to say something. "I'm trying to say.. for me it isn't just sex.. To do it, I need real relationship, real feelings, security.. Lust isn't enough. I'm sorry." I left quickly and he didn't try to stop me this time.

Next day early in the morning I left to collect data at camps. Work helped me to forget about that night, but as soon as I stopped, it all returned. The most scary thing was to return back to Velaris and meet him. So I extended my stay as much as possible.

Four months later I was sitting in a sitting room of River House, chatting with Feyre and Mor by the fireplace after the family dinner. I collected all data to get some presentable results and currently I was half through writing in down. (Just between us, the rumors have proven to be true. Larger wingspan equals bigger you-know-what)

It was few weeks since I returned to Velaris and so far Azriel was avoiding me as much as possible. When we happened to be in the same room, he didn't even acknowledge me, looking the other side. So much for my fear.

Did it hurt? As hell. He was my friend. The feelings he awakened that night also didn't disappear over night, haunting me down every spare minute I had. I pushed them deep down, but it was too late. I'd already fallen for him.

During our stay at camps, Mor found out that something must have happened before we left, but she'd never asked about it. Which I was very grateful for. I wasn't ready to talk about it.

Now she kept peeking somewhere behind me, biting on her lower lip, unusually silent. Something was obviously bothering her. I could ask her straight away, but I decided to give her 5 minutes to see if she would start to talk on her own. It took exactly 3 minutes.

"Uhm, Y/N, tell me. Something happened between you and Az?"

"I may have hurt his male ego. Why?" I replied as casually as possible.

"He keeps eyeing you and I know that look too well. He watched me like that for five centuries, but it's never turned into something so... Desperate?" She turned to Feyre. "What do you think?"

Feyre inconspicuously peeked behind me, too. "Yeah, definitely desperate. And sad. Rhys said that lately he isn't himself. As if something was wrong with him? Maybe bothered him? But he won't talk about it."

Mor nodded. I had the urge to turn around and see for myself, but I resisted.

"What happened?" Mor asked and Feyre leaned closer, eager for details.

"Well, he kind of misunderstood the situation.. and I told him.. that I don't do the one night stay thing.."

"He actually went after you?" Mor beamed lowering her voice.

"Not really. I might have provoked him a bit," I reluctantly admitted.

They giggled like small girls, looking at each other.

"Y/N, believe me when I tell you that you can't provoke him," Mor whispered enthusiastically. "Nobody is able to break him. He is like.. granite."

"There must be something more behind it," Feyre added. "You should go and talk to him."

"You should," Mor agreed. "He looks to be on the verge of total breakdown." She again peeked behind me. "Go. Right. Now."

They both gave me nod, stood up and moved to another chat group. I stayed alone, just like Azriel who sat in an alcove with window behind me. I inhaled deeply, slowly breathing out. I could at least give it a try. Standing up I took my glass and walked to him.

"Hey."

"Hey," he answered lowly. I hardly heard him. His face was as unreadable as usually, but his impossibly beautiful hazel eyes.. Yeah, they were right. He looked to be on verge of breakdown. Even his posture was all wrong. Slumped shoulders, hunched over, wings hanging down. The shadows hoovered around him like embodiment of his current mood.

"Everything alright?"

He nodded looking away. Ouch. He didn't want to talk with me. I probably hurt his ego more than I thought. I was lost for words. Did he expect me to apologise? I certainly wouldn't do that. I had every right to stop him back then.

Oh, male and their ego. Suddenly memories of my ex flooded my mind. And I got mad. Rage was the only emotion that never disappeared completely nor healed.

I turned around, ready to leave before I could take it out on the wrong person. Strong fingers wrapped around my arm, stopping me. They held me gently, but firmly. I looked back at Azriel and all the rage was gone instantly.

"Would you mind to it down with me?"

I couldn't speak, still shocked by the pain in his eyes. Just when I was seated in the alcove, he released me and sat back down, too. Silence stretched between us.

"I meant to say this much sooner," he started slowly. "I'm so sorry for my poor behaviour. I'm so ashamed." My fingers curled into fist, but I didn't dare to interrupt him. "I know you were just joking to make me feel better, to relax. I knew it even back then. I wish I could explain why I did it, but I can't. I was.. dick."

And how big dick. I had to bite down on my lip to stop myself. This was serious situation. But in all seriousness, he broke the records. Nobody had bigger than him.

"I should have covered with towel as you asked me. I shouldn't have stopped you. I shouldn't have kissed you," he whispered the last sentence. "I should even be sorry that I kissed you, but I am not. I wanted it. Really wanted. Still want it. I'm trash." He stood up quickly. I managed to pull him back down before he could run away. My pulse skyrocketed.

Waitwaitwait. Had he just said that he still wanted to kiss me? My rational part demanded answers. I had to solve this question before my reckless heart could come to own conclusion. I didn't need another heartbreak.

I looked deep into his eyes. I looked only for truth and nothing else. "Tell me, Az, why? Why do you still want it?"

He blushed fiercely and tried to look away, but I wouldn't let him. "Please."

"I..love you," he whispered and my heart stopped for second only to start racing at a crazy pace later.

I wasn't sure he really said that. That must be just my imagination, right? I gazed at beautiful, elegant Elain with big doe eyes sitting on the other side of room, laughing with her sisters. Yeah, I imagined it. But when my eyes slid back to him, he was gazing right back, tensed, waiting.

"I'm sorry. I think I misheard," I smiled nervously.

"I said.. I love you," Azriel repeated quietly, but clearly.

A single tear rolled down my cheek. I didn't think. I couldn't. I just surged forward and hugged him. He stiffened for a heartbeat and then his strong arms wrapped around me and held me firmly. Another tear followed the first one and then another, until it turned into an endless stream. I felt a cool touch of his shadows. They hid us from prying eyes. Or so I thought.

World tilted to the side and we were in my office where it all had started.

"More private," Azriel whispered when I released him to take a look around, confused.

I quickly wiped tears away. "Oh." I still wasn't ready to talk. My head was a total mess. Love. Azriel just told me he loved me. And he was still waiting for my answer. But I wasn't currently able to put the words together to make even a simple sentence.

"Do you need water?" he offered, helping me to sit to an armchair, the very same armchair where he.. Nope, I couldn't think about it now. It would be too much.

What was the question? Ah, water.. Did I need it? I nodded anyway and he handed me a glass. I emptied it immediately.

Azriel watched me carefully as if I could explode any second. I was trying to find something to ground me and my eyes fell to the notebook. "Wingspan," I blurted. His brows furrowed. "You have the largest wingspan."

He huffed in amusement. "Do I?" Azriel took a step back, his eyes were sad again.

Maybe I was crazy, but I reached out and pulled him down on me. "I believe I still haven't repaid for your help."

He shook his head. " You don't have to-"

"I want." I cupped his cheeks between my hands. He hesitated searching my face, his body tensed above me.

Azriel slowly leaned down and kissed me. It was nothing like the last kiss driven by lust and desire. This kiss was careful, exploring. I pushed against his shoulder and we exchanged our positions.

Just like the last time, Azriel was sitting in the armchair and I was above him. I made sure there was space between us. I didn't want to provoke him, sex was out of the question yet. He knew it, too, and kept his hands on my waist.

I deepened the kiss and soon enough we both turned into a panting mess. Azriel's moan startled me.

"I'm sorry," he rasped.

I giggled. "You moaned back then, too."

"I can't help it," he smiled. Azriel leaned forward, keeping small space between us. He hid his face in the crook of my neck, inhaling deeply again and again. "Touch them."

I swallowed. "What?"

"You can touch them," he spread his wings wide around us. "I've never allowed anybody to touch them. But now I want you to do so."

I was speechless second time today. Sacred Illyrian wings and he asked me to touch them. This was Illyrian way to say he trusted me. He trusted me even with his life.

I ran my fingers through his soft hair. "You know that.. there will be no sex today nor any time soon.." I hoped it came out as a joke. Truthful, but still joke.

He laughed breathlessly. "I know. That doesn't change the fact I want you to touch them. You said you want to repay me. So please.." He kissed the sensitive spot under my ear.

He got me there. If he only knew what he had called upon himself. I wanted to touch them, badly, but not only because they were his. I wanted it because I was the damn researcher which equals to a monster at times. I longed to feel the texture of the skin, to feel every single bone and muscle in them, everything.

"Are you really sure about this?" My attention was already trained on the beautiful enormous wings around me. This was his last chance to back out of this.

"Absolutely. So put those damn little hands of yours on them already," he rasped, landing another kiss to that sensitive spot.

He didn't need to repeat it again.

I gasped as tips of my fingers traced the soft skin around the bone. It. Was. Perfect. I expected them to be cold and rough to touch. Even though I touched him just lightly, I could feel every single muscle, even the smallest ones. The bone seemed to be so fragile and strong at the same time. Skin was so warm, stretchy and impossibly soft like baby's skin. I mapped every vein running through the membranes, his pulse drumming under my hands. I traced every scarred tissue I found, paying it extra attention.

I was so immersed into exploring his wings that I hadn't noticed what my curiosity did to Azriel until he came under me with a wall shattering roar. I winced, looking down at him.

His head was tilted back, eyes closed tightly. He was trembling and panting, his broad chest heaving heavily. Streams of sweat were running down the column of his exposed neck. His hands were fisting the material of armrests so tightly he almost torn it into shreds.

I couldn't believe I'd missed something so..amazing. Azriel was a piece of art in every possible meaning. My fingers traced the vein that bobbed out on his neck. He shuddered, his eyes slowly opened, looking up at me. Shadowsinger smiled weakly. "Only you can do this to me," his voice was hoarse.

I brushed away a damp strand of hair that fell to his forehead. My heart was beating wildly as I leaned in and kissed him slowly and deeply. His hands embraced me, pulling me closer.

"I love you," I whispered to his mouth.

I wasn't scared anymore. In this very moment I was more confident than ever that I would spend the rest of my life with this perfect male. Because he was mine and I was his.

[black-lake]

astro observations 7

hey everyone, got some new observations and random astro thoughts 👽 🔭

——

🧊 The strongest aspects to the nodes in terms how obvious their effect can be, are squares then trines esp with tight orbs. They strongly activate the planet involved and the effect becomes very clear in how things unfold or manifest. e.g sun square or tine nn is more obvious to others, their personality is much more vibrant and noticeable. The conj/opp aspects are stronger but tricky to see, because they can mean something personal to the native, something karmic or unpredictable, like two people can have that aspect but have it manifest completely differently.

🧊 Saturn 11th could mean having to learn many of your life lessons through the internet or social media. Could be by observing people online and learning new things. These natives have felt alone majority of their lives and social media kept their company. May go through difficult experiences, like online bullying or feel rejected online. They eventually learn the sweet nonchalance and the importance of self love, that they don't care when people leave them or dislike them, because the ones that are meant to stay will stay. (This may apply to ppl w a stellium in the 11th, or chiron 11th).

🧊 Those who have saturn-nn aspects may have been involved with the law/governments or have fought for something that has to do with legal matters and order. Especially for or against their family. They aren't afraid to take it to court if it means regaining their rights. They tend to win cases because they have a strong sense of justice. If negatively aspected or dealt with, they may need to watch out for that, or for their need to put someone down using the law.

🧊 Venus in aries woman also like the friends before lovers dynamic, just like aqua. They prefer to be friends with guys first and can flirt with them until it evolves into a relationship. They’re also comfortable with masculine energy way more than feminine so they tend to make friends with boys a lot. Also they're not impulsive in love as they're said to be, if they choose someone it's because they found that physical chemistry, passion, youthfulness, independence, and loyalty in them, which they rarely do and they'd rather stay solo.

🧊 Thinking about how astrology signs and houses have a connection to our body, like from aries or 1st being the head, taurus or 2nd being the neck, gemini or 3rd being arms hands, cancer or 4th being the chest area, leo or 5th being the heart space, virgo or 6th being the stomach area, libra or 7th being the kidneys and lower back, scorpio or 8th being the the genitals, sagittarius or 9th being the thighs, capricorn or 10th being the knees and other bones, aquarius or 11th being the calves and ankles, and all the way down to pisces or 12th being the feet. I just find it fascinating. I know there are other body parts ruled by these signs, but I'm particularly pointing at the way it goes in order, from head to feet which is really interesting to think about, like how coincidental could that be? it makes it real.

🧊 Through learning more about astrology and how it relates to body parts, you can use that to heal and soothe your body. If you have pisces in your chart you may benefit from soaking your feet in water with salt or soap for stress relief, and grounding, being in water in general, music and rhythms could be healing too. If you have capricorn you may like to run a lot, exercise a better posture, chiropractic treatment, spend money on skincare and your dental care. If you have Leo placements, take care of your generous heart, your hair, go outside and get you vitamin d, massage your shoulders and upper back. I can do a whole post about that.

🧊 Speaking of that — I think there is so much more undiscovered in astrology. Way more info that is waiting to be discovered. We haven't been discovering much lately. I mean uranus was discovered in the 700s, neptune 800s, pluto 900s, and these were the official discoveries. The more we discover planets, galaxies or other yet to name objects, the more we discover things about our lives, and how everything in the universe is connected and affects our experience on earth. I just wanna reincarnate 700 years later and see to what extent things evolved, or maybe that's a short period. 

🧊 What if aliens are studying earth as an outer planet which may mean something particular to them just like we study say Jupiter and Saturn as planets with certain themes. Who knows what’s going on up there. But yeah this page is getting weirder by the day... I- sry 👀

🧊 I’m one of those that would skip the big three and jump right at north node aspects fr (all including minor aspects). I want to know a person’s life journey and potential before their personality traits. It can tell a lot about destiny, what comes naturally to us and where we need growth and even about our past lives. 

🧊 Consider meghan stallion whose chart I recently saw. The moment I saw it, I thought it couldn't be more fitting and clear. With mercury square nn, she had a urge to use her voice early on, her mercury is something that should be utilized, she raps and writes music. Mercury conjunct uranus, it's the unique ability to sing, rap and make music, a creative mind. Pallas opposite nn, she got a lot of natural charisma with her talents, she radiates confidence and strength which makes her liked. (also pallas-nn aspects can make someone influential). Venus sextile nn, she is well liked and has a lot of charm, she may do smth related to beauty. 

🧊 I don’t usually consider cusps in astrology when it comes to signs, it depends on whether I see the influence or not, I rarely do. But I def look at house cusps (especially asc, dsc, mc and ic). That axis, the end of a house and the beginning of the next is so important to look at, not just degrees but planets there. When planets are at the cusp of a house (up to 7°), it influences both houses i noticed. e.g. If saturn is on the cusp of the 8th and 9th then both houses are significant to look at, it could mean lessons related to studies, resources, travel, inner transformation, connections.. etc. Same with saturn on the cusp of the 11th and 12th, lessons related to friendships, hopes and dreams, the collective, loneliness, spirituality... etc. 

🧊 Planets conj/opp your asc or mc are a big part of how you appear to the world. They can overpower your asc or mc signs at times especially before you introduce yourself and have a proper talk with someone. Once they know you personally they'll pick up on the ascendant sign traits. Strangers or the ones that don’t know you will pick up on the planet's energy before the sign. e.g. if you have uranus conjunct asc or mc, no matter the ascendant your uranus qualities will be more visible to others. If you have more than one planet conj/opp then you could give off different impressions to different people. I have uranus conjunct mc and pluto opposite ascendant, I've had some see me as eccentric, detached and some others as mysterious, powerful. This applies to planets in 1st and 10th.

🧊 The most difficult moon signs are capricorn, scorpio, aquarius and virgo. They know what it feels like to be emotionally drained, yet empty. They'd rather not show emotion, even scorpios don't show a fraction of the range of emotions they experience. They deal with it differently, but they all put on a cold front, even with themselves, seeming unemotional, especially the saturians. They sometimes don’t know how to show the depth, wisdom and caring heart they have, but they damn sure know how to work hard and be that special person. They add so much to the world but they don’t feel like they fairly get any back. Each of these signs have distinct traits of their own but I applaud y’all. The most interesting to observe truly. 

🧊 Also with these moon signs, their mother may have been a challenging figure in their lives, she may have been either critical, controlling, egoistical, cold or just absent in some way. They likely didn't have an easy childhood to say the least.

🧊 The moon is what we inherit from the mother and it's exactly how we develop those traits, and how we essentially... treat her back. So if the mommy of a cap moon child thought she could be overbearing, cold and expect the unexpected from her child, she can be met with an advanced level of coldness and authority from her grown child, thanks to her. Same with a virgo moon child's mother, if she thought she could be critical and compare them to literally anything and judge the hell out of their existence, they would give her a neat taste of her medicine, sharper criticism backed with better facts. The mother also learns a lot from her children through their moon sign. This applies to all moons.

🧊 I noticed that scorpio placements don't find it easy to change or let go of things (unless they have many pluto aspects). I met many scorpio ppl and they tend to hold on to the past, tightly. Many of them told me they hate moving out. It depends on other placements tho, if mixed with capricorn or earth, they are sooo traditional and stubborn my god. If mixed with air, they're less to hold on. Pluto placements and aspects are the actual phoenixes, they embrace every part of their transformation process, they burn things to ashes and emerge stronger, I love seeing it.

🧊 Every time I meet a pisces moon person, they have some unusual quirks to them. They can have this awkward yet charismatic behavior, like wtf was that, but you stare at their watery eyes. Pisces moon men esp, the weirdest sense of humor 🤚s down, but you can't help it cuz it's cute. Which is why they can trick and manipulate you cuz you thought they were innocent *pleading emoji*.  

🧊 Quintiles and bi-quintiles give me an aquarius vibe, they hold such a unique energy to them, a different connection between the planets. Quintiles to the nodes or mc, it's so refreshing and special whatever that quality you got, it may even be addictive to others (sun, venus, neptune quintile nn). Check if you have asteroids quintile the nodes, you may benefit from tapping in to the potential they hold and utilizing it.

🧊 Whatever house pluto is in it’s where you got power that you needed to learn to take back. It was gained eventually through being taken away from you or not seen by you. The power of realizing the effect you have over the themes of a certain house which activates it.

🧊 Some examples, pluto 10th, how people see you publicly may not be who you are at home. The accusations or assumptions, the jealousy and maybe even manipulations about your career choices made you feel powerless at times but it’s where your power lies. As soon as they discover that it's up to them to decide who they are publicly, they take back that power and show up in the public as an unstoppable force, changing the world. Pluto 7th, the constant mirroring of people’s shadows, the projections, the lies or manipulations that happened in their relationships made the native feel powerless in connections and over the way they see or present themselves. Once they embrace the way they appear and connect with others, a new sense of strength and power is awakened in them and they radiate that even more strongly, this time unapologetically. 

---

bonus - asteroids obs ⚛︎

🧊 People that have charisma (627) in a fire sign stand out when they're taking action, they naturally radiate that leadership vibe, others expect them to take imitative with things especially if it's in aries, they have that youthful go getter vibe. If it's in leo they're seen as very influential and others follow their lead. If in sag they're seen as funny and joyous to be around, everyone wants to be with them. 

🧊 Asteroid aura (1488) can show you what colors and styles look good on you, check the sign, degree and house. If it's in an earth sign, those earthy colors, greens, browns, formal, vintage. dark academia styles. If in a fire sign, those fiery vibrant colors, colorful sparkly makeup, casual yet bold looks. In an air sign, classy or street looks, patterns and accessories, youthful styles. If in a water sign, dreamy flowy fabrics, neutral colors, blues and purples, jewels.

🧊 Also check the planets it aspects, say aura is in pisces conj saturn then you can incorporate those dreamy looks in a saturnian typa way, e.g. I imagine a man in a bright silk shirt with brown vintage pants, a matching jacket, and a pearl choker, something ethereal but earthy at the same time. 

🧊 Asteroid sirene (1009) in scorpio, aspecting pluto or in the 8th could make someone have an extremely alluring presence like you would want to stare for long to understand their vibes but you won't. I also find it alluring if it's in capricorn, aquarius or pisces. 

🧊 Asteroid meesters (10647) and talent (33154) in aquarius or the 11th could mean creating or inventing something new in your field, having or mastering a unique or rare skill. This can also mean recognition for a unique talent. Aspecting nn can mean you mastered some talents in a past life or will in this life.

-- I had these for so long in my notes, but I just felt inspired to post, forgive me. 🐯🫶

[fruitsofhell]

I used to be one of those guys when I first joined the Kirby fandom, but everytime I hear a discussion of the series writing that starts with "So the Lore is InSaNe-" and not like, "Kirby has a fun writing style that takes advantage of its cute exterior to tell cool stories that reward player's curiosity and leave lots of room for imagination-" I cringe so goddamn hard.

I kinda just hate that people approach things that encourage investment when they don't expect it as inherently absurd. Like it is fun to joke about how absurd Kirby lore can be, but it really often comes with an air of disrespect or exhaustion rather than like, appreciation that these games are made by people who want to tell interesting stories when they could easily make as much money just making polished enough fluffy kiddy platformers. And when it's not met with exhaustion, it's met with - like I said before - that tone that it's stupid for a series like this TO have devs who care about writing stuff for it. Which is a whole other thing about people not respecting things made to appeal to kiddie aesthetic or tone.

Maybe the state of low-stakes YouTube video essays just blows cause people play up ignorance and disbelief for engagement, but like I STG I hear people use this tone for like actual narrative based games sometimes. Some people don't like... appreciate when a game is made by people who care a shitton in ways that aren't direct gameplay feedback. And they especially don't appreciate it when it comes from something with any sense of tonal dissonance intentional or not.

Anyways, I love games made by insane people. I love games made by teams who feel like they wanna make something work or say something so bad. I love that energy, especially when invested into something that could easily rest on its laurels or which obviously won't be taken seriously. I love this in a lot of classic campy 2000s games, I love this in insanely niche yet passionate fanworks, and I love it in the Kirby series and its writing. Can we please stop talking about it like it's an annoyance or complete joke?

[ftmtftm]

I know this is just sort of the nature of Tumblr and the internet in general, but I genuinely deeply, deeply resent the way reactionary, inflammatory behavior tends to get the most instant gratification type of attention from both those who agree and disagree with the subject matter in conversations about transandrophobia. It's blatantly obvious and it's childish / teenagerish in a way I am deeply uninterested in. Which sucks because it absolutely comes at the cost of the state of the transandrophobia tag being filled with types of rhetoric I find really distasteful.

It's part of why I've shifted focus into generally just posting more about gender and feminism with a focus on trans masculinity, rather than specifically posting about transandrophobia explicitly honestly.

I think a lot about an anon I got forever ago that essentially accused me of having a "holier than thou complex" or something along those lines and maybe there is truth to the fact that I like being mostly on my own over here in my own corner doing my own thing posting about feminism and gender - but I also genuinely just don't see any merit or meaningful function in being intentionally inflammatory or argumentative or poking bears with sticks for the sake of engagement. It's purposeless beyond the mini dopamine hit a ton of notes and support gets you and that's very much not the reason I made and continue to use this blog, you know?

It'll be interesting to watch though because I'm already starting to see a decline that is really actually echoing what happened with transmedicalist spaces in the 2010's.

A lot of transmed spaces, at least when I was initially being introduced to them, were actually full of a lot of people who were passionate about understanding more about medical transition - particularly the destigmatization surrounding trans masculine medical transition. There wasn't a lot of talk about dysohoria being necessary to transness or brain sex type stuff, so much as it was a lot of guys who wanted more research into different kinds of bottom surgeries, sharing information about top surgery options, challenging biased ideas about testosterone as a scheduled drug, etc. etc.

Then those spaces started melding with truscum spaces and the people interested in genuine medical advocacy began to jump ship because the reactionaries were becoming too much to manage.

I'm definitely starting to see something similar happen right now. And you know? I'll be deeply disappointed if something like that happens to the conversation on transandrophobia, but also? I'll kind of be unsurprised - especially given the fact that I have already unfollowed folks for bordering on things like transmed rhetoric themselves the last few months.

I won't stop posting in the ways I do in my own little corner because I believe in the things I say and the work I do on and offline, but it is fascinating and sad to watch this kind of thing happen again from the sidelines.

[therecordconnection]

Some Thoughts Regarding James Somerton

I know I'm rather late to the conversation and some of these points may have already been talked about in some form elsewhere on the site, but if you don't mind, I have some thoughts of my own regarding the subject of hbomberguy's latest video and I would like to take time to voice. This blog is normally dedicated to music and music writing, not posts about disgraced Youtubers, so I apologize for the detour in regularly scheduled programming.

First, I think it's important to make the distinction that Somerton isn't just a case of "problematic Youtube guy got owned... twice" but rather a genuine case of academic dishonesty, which is several grades above youtuber drama. This isn't something like Tati Westbrook getting angry at James Charles for sucking dick and cock at a birthday dinner. This isn't Ethan Klein and Trisha Paytas or whomever having beef. It's not Charlie Critikal talking about some stupid drama of the day or someone just using Youtube videos to say a bunch of gross and problematic stuff. No. This is a fucking grifter who not only lied, cheated, and stole his way to the top, but also did it by using a vulnerable community that has long had their voices snuffed out and their history completely rewritten or wiped from existence altogether. What history he didn't plagiarize, he twisted and outright lied about. He just made shit up to suit his own gross agenda.

A lot of things about James Somerton left me absolutely livid, and I admit that I didn't even know who he was until hbomberguy's video. I think what makes me the most mad is that I went to undergrad and grad school with a number of jackoffs that were just like him. People that didn't give a shit about the art of writing and research and just treated academia and the pursuit of knowledge and how to critically engage with art and media into a stupid game that only chumps take seriously. Somerton pisses me off because I AM a writer. When I write the Ranting and Raving series of posts on here, that stuff doesn't just fly out of my ass. I have to sit with a song, study it, research it, and make sure I know what I'm talking about so I don't look like a clown. I also have to make sure that I link and credit where I'm getting information from. It's not just important for my own satisfaction, but it's important for anyone who stumbles upon a post on this blog and takes time out of their day to read it and/or reblog it.

I think that's the part that makes me the most mad. That he and Nick Hergott have so little respect for the work that goes into researching and writing about a topic that other people are really passionate about. Spending time with something, studying it, and figuring out an interesting and unique perspective on it is a great feeling. Sharing what you find or how you see something with others and having them either like or reblog your work is an even greater feeling. That's my writing that somebody enjoyed and thought was worth sharing with others. Fuck fuck fuck Somerton for thinking you can take a million little shortcuts to get to that result.

While I'm on the topic, I don't think Hergott gets a pass for Somerton's actions. I've seen some people make the argument that he isn't complicit and there's a chance that he genuinely had no clue that Somerton was doing this... but I don't buy it. There's no way he didn't know and wasn't in on it in some capacity. Even if he wasn't, as Todd in the Shadows pointed out in his video on this situation, Nick is, whether you like it or not, an accomplice to Somerton's lies and he is complicit in the blame, due to his name being included in the "Written By" credit of a lot of those videos with Somerton. The way I see it, I find it hard to believe that he couldn't have known. I imagine part of Hergott's signing on with Somerton was that in the event that shit hits the fan, Hergott would be used as a fall guy to help deflect accusations of plagiarism.

To return to Somerton, in a way, he's almost worse than AI/Chat-GPT because, really, an AI has no morals. It can only do what someone punches in and tells it to do. Somerton is a guy who does have genuinely insidious ambitions and knows fully what he's doing. That shit about "only the boring gays who didn't mess around in the eighties survived the aids crisis" is the wildest and grossest accusation I've seen about gay people in some time. The wild takes about the Nazis (especially all the wrong things he said about fitness relating to Nazis) should also raise a lot of red flags. I'll say this though, I don't blame anybody in the slightest for not fully realizing Somerton was saying shit like that or doing all of what he was doing until hbomberguy and Todd presented it a certain way and made it all very clear. It's easy to not notice it when Somerton buries it by ripping stuff off from other, better writers. So, if you were someone who was a big fan and was genuinely shocked by the things Todd had to fact-check and debunk and worried that you're a bad person for having not caught any of them, trust me, you're not. Nobody should blame you for not catching it. <3

While I'm ranting about this, I want to say that Somerton's patreon grift was really gross to see exposed as well (through Dan Olson's really great thread, which can be read here). I understand the allure of wanting to buy expensive gear and thinking that's somehow needed in order to make Good Content™️, but there's a stark difference between someone saying "I think I need to shell out a little money in order to get something of higher quality" and "I need to have the appearance of looking like my stuff is being made with high quality stuff." As someone who has been experimenting with trying to turn his writing into video, I did some audio tests this weekend and realized that maybe (just maybe) the old Turtle Beach microphone my brother left behind when he moved out isn't going to cut it. If I want to record something I can be happy with, I'm gonna have to bite it and look at getting something decent, but somewhat affordable from a Best Buy or something. You don't need the best tech in order to make something great, but you can't use copper tools forever if you have the means to be able to enjoy using iron ones, you know?

Somerton's grift reminded me of guys like Onision and Spoony. Grifters who looked to Patreon and other creator donation sites for an easy pay day and would bitch and cry and complain that it's your fault when they don't get it. Somerton making poor financial choices ON TOP of it being money that he scammed from a community of people that were looking to invest in a voice that they genuinely thought was speaking for them in a meaningful way, only makes the grift more disgusting and foul. Even if he's just "some Youtuber," Somerton still had a responsibility to his audience to present queer topics in an ACCURATE manner. He didn't and we all have the right to be angry with him about it. This isn't just silly youtuber controversy, this is academic dishonesty in it's purest form and if it gets you expelled from any college program, it should get you expelled from being able to show your face on Youtube as well, which is how Somerton's story will end.

I've been on the internet for many years. I've seen some of the worst, most problematic creators of all time find a way to bounce back from all kinds of controversy and find some kind of success again. I don't think that will happen for Somerton. Not one bit. What he's done is something you can never come back from, no matter how much you try to reform. If two different youtubers can make two completely different videos about why you suck, I don't think there's any recovery. What happened this weekend is a now classic episode of World's Most One Sided Fist Fights Caught on Film.

This post has gone on for a while, so let me wrap it up. I mean this without hyperbole and without exaggeration: James Somerton is a disgrace to both media criticism and the art of video creation. I genuinely hope he remains propped up as a cautionary tale of what can happen when you fully decide you have absolutely no respect for the Humanities and decide that lying, cheating, and stealing your way to the top, all while scamming and being incredibly shitty towards a community that has long suffered and is STILL suffering greatly to this day, is better than any kind of academic honesty. I understand that Somerton is just "some youtube fraud" to some people, but the problem lies more in what Somerton's actions and motivations represent. I really think hbomberguy's video on plagiarism is going to do a lot of good. It's going to help a lot of people avoid doing it as well as help people become more aware of what it really looks like and all the damage it can do.

Thank you for your time.

P.S. It doesn't really need to be said at this point, but make sure you support the queer voices and writers that did the work Somerton thought was good enough to just copy and paste into a video. They're the ones that suffered the most through all of this and my heart goes out to them, from one writer to another. <3

[sihtricfedaraaahvicius]

Game Night

Note: just another silly little fic that turned out longer than planned. Also; I use the terms geek and nerd here in a way that some may find rude, but it's written from readers perspective, and not my own, just fyi. 

Warnings: 18+, smut/fluff.

pairing: Modern!Sihtric x you (f)

summary: a game night turned steamy. 

wordcount: 3,1k

Masterlist

Osferth was without a doubt the biggest nerd you knew, but also one of your best friends regardless of how much of a geek he was. He always told you about the latest card game he had scored or that sick new board game that just got on the market. You didn't care much for it but always let him ramble on. And now, after years of begging, he had finally persuaded you to come to one of his game nights, which he held weekly in his basement. You knew he had several friends who participated in the games and shared Osferth's enthusiasm, but you had never met any of them and only heard of some by name. You figured them to be just as passionate as Osferth, and probably less good looking than your best friend too, because he may be a huge nerd, but he was a handsome one and even you couldn't deny that. His dating game was quite good and you knew he saw multiple ladies at once sometimes, which was a big turn off for you and withheld you from even entertaining the thought of dating him. Thus you were more like brother and sister.

The main reason why you had agreed to join one of the game nights was so Osferth would finally stop nagging about it, and you were curious what was so interesting about those games anyway and what actually happens during those famous nights. You were also curious about his friends, and fully expected them to be the stereotypical nerdy dudes who still didn't know deodorant is a thing they could use, and you thought they would probably make for good gossip material with your girlfriends. 

But you couldn't have been more wrong. 

You were greeted by three handsome men, who were seated on separate couches around the large table in Osferth's dimly lit basement. You were introduced to Finan first, an Irishman with dark hair and a good beard, who gave you a flirty wink upon meeting. Up next was a guy named Uhtred, who's accent you couldn't quite place, but with his long locks tied back and the sides shaved he was pleasant to the eye, and he flashed a friendly smile. Lastly your eyes landed on Sihtric, who was immediately intrigued by your presence, which didn't go unnoticed by Osferth, and the pretty dark-haired boy with the bold haircut perked up as he eyed you up and down with a curious smile. Just as you wanted to make a positive remark about his half shaved cut, you were interrupted when an older man rushed down the stairs onto the basement, panting while he apologised for being later than usual. You learned that the man who had joined the party was named Pyrlig, and he announced that, 'The brothers are coming.'

Shortly after Pyrlig's announcement you heard the sound of heavy boots stomping down the stairs along with a howling laughter, and that's how you were introduced to the brothers Erik and Sigefrid, who were clearly the life of the party, and with them the group was complete for the night. Everyone had taken their regular seat while you still stood awkwardly as you took everything in; the massive boardgame upon the table, the deck of cards next to it and the multiple dice along with enough booze and snacks to last a whole week. You also took notice of the lack of women and, being the only lady, you felt a little nervous. Osferth came up to you and told you to just pick a seat and join the table, promising the game wasn't hard to understand, but you protested at the suggestion of playing.

'But I don't know this game… I'd rather just watch,' you chuckled nervously, 'I can sit back there,' you pointed towards a couch in the corner.

'Don't be silly,' Osferth smiled, 'join us, you can just tag along with one of the guys.'

You shrugged lightly and reluctantly agreed, then asked who you should tag along with as you looked at the few empty spaces left, contemplating your options. The only couch that had no space left was that one the brothers sat on, which was a relief because the one named Sigefrid was pretty loud… and drunk. Osferth hadn't forgotten about Sihtric's interest upon seeing you, and it was hard to forget as the handsome stranger kept eyeing you up, so Osferth nonchalantly cocked his head towards his friend. A visible disappointment appeared on the face of each man in the room when you made your way over to Sihtric, apart from Osferth and Sihtric himself. Osferth had never been romantically interested in you, so he didn't care where you sat and, naturally, Sihtric flashed a cocky smile toward the others as you sat down next to him. Everyone made peace with the decision merely a split second later, and their regular chatter and laughter filled the room again while you got comfortable.

Sihtric leaned in immediately and held out his hand, 'I didn't quite catch your name, darling,' he lied with a warm and low voice.

You felt your cheeks heat up and repeated your name as you took the hand of your gaming partner for the night.

'Beautiful name,' Sihtric smiled and kissed the back of your hand, while his mismatched eyes remained locked with yours, 'for a beautiful lady.'

You giggled softly and waved off the compliment, but the damage had already been done. Sihtric's eyes lingered on you after he had let go of your hand. He placed his arm on the backrest of the couch, around your shoulders without touching, and he then sat back, relaxed while manspreading. You swallowed hard and checked him out from the corner of your eyes, as he casually drunk beer from a bottle while Osferth tried to get everyone's attention so the game could start.

Your eyes were pleased with the sight of the man on your left, who was dressed in all black; black boots, black skinny jeans with a black leather belt, and half buttoned up black blouse on top. His dark facial hair matched his dark eyeliner, and the few scars on his pretty face didn't bother you. You found it hard to believe that this guy, who was quite intimidating with his good looks and visible tattoos, was as much of a dork as your friend was. 

Everyone listened when Osferth spoke to the group, except you, because you were too busy distinguishing what Sihtric smelled like. Your conclusion was that he smelled like cedarwood and amber, accompanied by a hint of mint and the faint smell of cigarettes. And then, as if to nudge you out of your thoughts, Sihtric bumped his knee lightly against yours, which made you look up at him. He winked with a sly smile after having earned your attention, and you knew you were in for an interesting night.

About two hours had passed since the game got kicked off, and you still had no idea what was going on at the table. You had witnessed grown men argue, trying to cheat, curse at each other, and you were sure some of them kicked each other under the table every now and then too. It was an eventful sight and it looked like the game was still far from over. You didn't mind it though, because the pretty boy next to you had scooted closer not long after the game had started, to show you the cards he was to keep hidden from the others. According to Sihtric he was in a good position, for he held important parts of land and had an army closing in on the other gamers. And despite the fact you had no real idea of what his cards meant, you were impressed anyway for some inexplicable reason.

Sihtric seemed smart and patient during the game, despite the rash decisions he can make in real life, as he had told you, and he leaned in closer every now and then to discuss what his next move on the board should be. You loved the fact that he tried to include you, and that despite the fact your advice was useless or simply non-strategic, he never stopped discussing the options with you. You also enjoyed how he had smoothly lowered his arm off the backrest, and eventually rested nonchalantly around your neck, while you had placed your hand on his thigh under the wooden table, out of sight for everyone else.

As the hours passed by and the game progressed steadily, the rivals of your game partner became more and more drunk, until a petty argument broke out and everyone was accused of cheating. Osferth desperately tried to calm the competing men, while Sihtric just threw his cards on the table and dedicated his full attention to you, for there was no saving that game anymore. Sihtric wasn't drunk, perhaps a little tipsy, but the others were so far gone they couldn't even stand on their feet anymore. And no one even noticed how you and Sihtric had eventually moved to the lone couch in the darkened corner.

Sihtric had pulled your legs over his as you sat back, and he leaned in close, one hand on your thigh while his other held your chin lightly and his mismatched eyes looked you all over.

'So… how did a girl like you end up in a place like this?' he smiled with hooded eyes, completely smitten and captivated by you.

'Because of Osferth,' you replied, returning the rather dazed look as you were just as head over heels as he was, 'he's been telling me about his game nights for years, so I finally came over to make him stop asking me to come.'

Sihtric hummed softly with a smile, his hand moving moderately up your thigh as he nuzzled your nose, 'well… I'm glad you're here.'

'So am I,' you smiled with warm cheeks, your hands trailing mindlessly over his muscular chest, feeling the warmth of his body as your fingers grazed his exposed skin.

'You liked the game then?'

'I didn't really care about the game.'

'Then why are you happy you're here?' Sihtric asked playfully, already knowing the answer but wanting to hear it spill from your kissable lips.

'I think you know,' you chuckled and moved your fingers through his dark, soft curls.

'Do I know?' he taunted and leaned in, his lips faintly touching yours.

'You know,' you whispered, not telling him what he wanted to hear just yet.

'Hm… I know I wanna take you home,' he smiled and squeezed your thigh, 'and I also know I want you to tell me where you are most sensitive.'

You grinned and played with the pendant he wore around his neck, 'And what if I won't tell you?'

'Then you can show me.'

'Show you?' you feigned confusion, 'how?'

'By taking my hand and guiding it.'

'And then?' a cheeky smile appeared on your face.

'And then,' his breath tickled your lips as he chuckled, 'then I'll make you feel really good, darling,' he husked, 'would you like that?'

'Yeah,' you breathed, almost desperately, and you trailed your fingers down his chest to undo another button of his blouse, aching to see more of his scarred torso.

'Yeah?' Sihtric murmured and dragged his lips down your neck, where he left you short, mischievous kisses and wet kitty licks in between.

'Fuck,' you exhaled sharply with a smile, your hands on his chest underneath his blouse, feeling the rapid beating of his heart while you felt his lips curl into a smile as they were pressed onto your neck.

'Fuck?' he repeated with a devilish tone, 'you wanna fuck?'

You hummed approvingly as he leaned back to look in your eyes. He took your chin, his thumb circling your parted lips while he bit down on his lower lip before he brought face closer to yours again.

'Yeah?' he whispered, smiling, 'you want me to fuck you, darling?'

'Please,' you almost whimpered as you struggled to downplay your desperate need.

'What was that?' he clearly jested and shoved his hand between your thighs.

'Please,' you giggled and mindlessly grinded against his hand, 'please… I want you to fuck me.'

Sihtric smiled, and he took your hand as he got up, leading you discretely up the stairs while the others were still arguing over the game. Upstairs, in the hallway, Sihtric turned to you and placed one hand on your waist, pulling you closer, and the other on the back of your head as he finally kissed you after having endured hours of unbearable tension. He pushed you up against the wall and kissed you deeply, his tongue down your throat while you felt his trapped arousal pressing through his tightened jeans. You rubbed your palm over his hardened cock and he moaned into your mouth while he grabbed a fistful of your locks, and he yanked your head slightly back to make you look up at him after he broke the kiss.

'Upstairs,' he uttered, his enamoured look never leaving his face.

You knew Osferth's place all too well, and clearly Sihtric did too, for you both knew of the spare room on the second floor and you were quick to pull him with you up the stairs. You began to unbutton the rest of his blouse while he kissed you, and you both nearly stumbled as you clumsily climbed the steps while being all over each other.

'We should be quick,' you mumbled in between kisses as you reached the bedroom, 'before anyone will notice we left.'

'Trust me,' Sihtric husked and pulled you in the room, 'they won't notice, so I'll be taking my time.'

He kicked the door shut and buried his face in your neck, while his hands held your waist as he pushed you backwards to bed. Your hands were in his hair, your head thrown back while you enjoyed the touch of his lips on your sensitive skin.

'What's your favourite position?' he murmured in your ear as you slid his blouse off his shoulders.

'Doggy,' you grinned, 'but…' you paused and took his face, 'you're too beautiful. I want to see you while you fuck me.'

Sihtric chuckled, and it was evident that he enjoyed seeing you as well, so he cocked his head towards the desk with a mirror above it, and he smirked. You kissed him as he unbuttoned your jeans, and he spun you around to face the mirror once you reached the desk. You giggled with anticipation when Sihtric pulled your jeans and panties down, just low enough to have quick access, and he did the same with his own jeans, then he took off your shirt.

'Anything to worry about?' he asked and pulled out his cock as he stood behind you.

'All clean,' you smiled, 'and protected. What about you, handsome?'

'All clean,' he reassured with a wink and lined up with your soaked folds, wasting no more time and pushing himself inside you with ease.

You gasped and grabbed onto the desk as you felt him twitch inside you with each slow stroke, hitting all the right spots, keeping a steady and calm pace while filling you up entirely. You felt his big and warm hand on your waist, while he slid his other up into your hair, and he grabbed a fistful to pull your head back and make you look up into the mirror, locking his dazed eyes with yours while you were both smiling lustfully. You quickly started to curse under your breath as you watched him take you, to which his parted lips curled into a smug smile, and he leaned in closer.

'Does that feel good, darling?' he murmured in your ear, along with his raspy breathing while the desk rattled with every deep thrust.

'Mhm, so good,' you hummed.

'Yeah?' Sihtric chuckled, 'so do you.'

Then, he suddenly picked up his pace, and he fucked you with fast and short thrusts until you couldn't think straight anymore and your tongue hung out of your mouth. You struggled to keep your eyes open while Sihtric dumbed you down, and he yanked your head slightly backwards again when he noticed your struggle.

'Don't look away from me,' he growled sweetly, 'I'll stop if you won't look at me,' he threatened and moved his hand from your hip down to your core.

He stimulated you with with his fingers while he continued to fuck you, making you a trembling and moaning mess until you both came and then started to laugh, out of breath, at the impulsive absurdity that had just occurred in your best friend's spare bedroom. You gasped lightly when you felt the pretty boy pull out, after making sure you had taken his entire load and wouldn't waste a drop, and he gave you back your shirt before he pulled his jeans up again. When you were both decently dressed again he carefully took your face in his hands and kissed you admiringly and sweetly. You wrapped your arms around his neck as he leaned his forehead against yours, and you sighed softly.

'It's late, but I don't think I want to leave you just yet.'

'Good,' Sihtric whispered and nuzzled your nose, 'because I wasn't going to let you leave yet.'

You smiled and he captured you in another kiss, which was rudely disturbed when suddenly the bedroom door flung open and a drunken Irishman stared at you both as you were all tangled up, leaning back against a closet. You and Sihtric looked at Finan with wide eyes, knowing you got caught and he had the ability to make it a whole happening in front of his friends.

'Uhh,' Finan sounded and then burped loudly before he turned and closed the door again, 'nope, I don't see them anywhere either,' he shouted and stumbled down the stairs again.

You both sighed and laughed with relief, then kissed again before Sihtric took cupped your cheeks.

'Are all game nights like this?' you asked.

'If you mean getting drunk and arguing, then yes,' Sihtric chuckled, 'but this… what we did, that is new,' he smiled and pecked your lips, 'are you coming next week too?'

'I don't know,' you shrugged playfully, 'will you make me?'

'Yeah,' Sihtric said with a cocky smile, 'I'll make you come again, darling.'

taglist: @foxyanon @alexagirlie @sihtricsafin @neonhairspray @gemini-mama @lexwolfhale @sigtryggrswifey @skyofficialxx @djarinsgirl27 @m-a-s-h-k-a @verenahx @mrsarnasdelicious @diiickbrainn @little-diable @maii777 @urmomsgirlfriend1 @dixie-elocin @elle4404 @bubblyabs @ylvie50 @succnfuccubus @hb8301 @willowbrookesblog @apolloanddaphnis @jennifer0305 @carnationworld @justanother-sihtricgirlie @stark-head @il0vebeingdelulu @thenameswinter99 @deathbluestar113

If you want to be added to/removed from the taglist, message me 🖤

[masonmyluv]

Part 1

A/N: I really hope you will all like this story. It’s my first pretty long story (it will have around 10 parts, so stay tuned ;) ) that I’m posting here. You can also find the story on my wattpad account (username: tmrxlover_writer).

Pictures are from Pinterest, the filter is Cinnamon on Polarr.

Warnings: none

︵✦⋆₊°˖︵‿₊

Another day at Uni after he just scored his first La Liga goal . He was buzzing, but had to be on time for classes. He was sure the whole university will congratulate him. Being famous was difficult when you just wanted to be a normal student.

"Our boy Fermin is back!"

You looked up from your notes to see Fermin being congratulated by the whole class. People hugging him, patting him on the back. "Thanks man" he kept saying, trying to make his way to his place. He just wanted the class to begin so everyone could leave him alone. "Hey" he said, sitting next to you. "Hi" you replied quietly. Being the shy nerdy girl was bad enough when you were sitting near the hot athletic guy. You asked yourself multiple times why did he choose to sit near you in the first year. There were a lot of empty places, but he chose the second row in the front, exactly near you. "Anything that I missed?" He asked, looking at your notes. He always admired your beautiful handwriting and how organised you were, so he knew where to choose to sit at your first class together. Surely not the guy with only a piece of paper and a pen, but rather the girl surrounded by books, coloured pencils and a cup of coffee. He didn't have the balls to ask you to get coffee in the morning, even though he wasn't drinking it, he would offer to come along with you.

"Erm...not really. We talked about more practical stuff. I made some notes if you want to take a picture or something" you offered shyly. You never ever gave your notes to anyone because they were just some lazy asses who didn't care about anything, but you were here to learn. You wanted to be a physiotherapist. They were here just to get a diploma. Not Fermin though. He was passionate about the subject, even though he missed a lot of classes because of his packed schedule. You were willing to help him because he showed interest. And appreciated your work too.

"Thanks. Actually I had an idea, I mean a proposal" he said. "I'm quite behind with everything, so I was wondering if you'd like to meet somewhere and help me catch up? It's okay if you don't want to" he said nervously. Why the heck was he nervous? He scored his first goal in freaking La Liga and was nervous talking to a girl he's seen almost every day in 3 years. You thought about his idea, you wanted to help him, but you weren't the person to meet up in random places to study. You liked the confined space of your room and desk, and maybe the library or the coffee shop, when you had to do computer work.

"I don't want to sound... uhh... like I'm inviting myself" he said blushing as if reading your mind. "But I can come to your place, if that's okay with you". "I... uhh" you rambled on, but the professor was already in class, ready to read one of his boring presentations for 2 hours. You barely paid attention to what he was saying, debating whether to accept Fermin's idea or not, while drawing random patterns on your copybook. Fermin noticed you zooming out so he scribbled something down on his own copybook. He nudged you so you could read what he wrote.

It's okay. It was just an idea :)

You shook your head, writing under his: we talk after the class.

For the rest of the class, you took notes, while Fermin tried paying attention, but his mind kept drifting off somewhere else. What if he overstepped with all this I-can-come-to-your-place-to-study thing and you would think he's weird? He face palmed himself for that, but you were his only hope to pass the exams this semester. The professor finally ended the class and you started packing your bag. Neither of you spoke until you were out of the class.

"Listen I—"

"It's okay if—"

You both stopped mid sentence and chuckled. "You first" he encouraged. "So, I think it's okay for you to come. I live alone anyway. Just tell me when it's okay with you". Fermin couldn't believe what he was hearing. You never ever invited someone over and he could respect that it was your safe place and he didn't want to intrude. "Are you sure it's okay?" He asked and you nodded. "Okay, let me see. Actually I'll text you the day before because I'll have some recovery trainings and I'll be free to come" he said. "I know it's difficult to put up with me" he chuckled nervously. "It's okay. It's not like I'm a party animal or anything" you said. "Okay... I'll let you know soon. Bye. And thank you" he said, climbing into his car. He thought of offering you a car ride, but maybe it was too much overstepping in one day, so he just waved at you and you waved back to him.

When you arrived home, you thought about this day. What the heck was today? Of course you gave him your notes pretty often, but him to come here to study? That was a whole new level.

︵✦⋆₊°˖︵‿₊

Hope you like it 🤍

Feedback is appreciated 😊

[the-possum-writes]

Hi! Could you do a Finn x Fem reader lemon? Maybe it could be with and inexperienced reader while finn already has some knowledge about it and shows her how to do it. Thank you! <3

[Finn teaching an Inexperienced Reader]

❥Character: Finn Mertens ❥Tags: NS/FW hc's, handj0bs, established relationship, fem!reader ❥Synopsis: Finn takes things slow with you but you convince him to teach you how he likes to be touched. ❥A/N: I was going through a writing block so there's no full smut but rather some handsy stuff.

❥Whether you've been dating for years or just a few weeks, if you tell Finn you want to take things slowly, he'll respect your wishes.

❥Only kissing and hugging, nothing more.

❥But that doesn't take away how startling it is when a kissing session becomes too intense, and just as you feel the warmth cling to your heart and stomach in a tightening squeeze, Finn pulls away from you and acts as if nothing happened, resuming whatever video game you were playing or changing the subject.

❥You know where babies come from and all that basic biology class, but you have yet to personally experience it and are kind of wary of unplanned pregnancies, that's why you told Finn you wanted to take things slow.

❥And he was okay with that, but it didn't stop the growing doubt since you know he's had past encounters with other girls before. "Is he getting frustrated at me cause I'm making him wait?" you'd start asking yourself.

❥Finn is a passionate and outgoing guy who pours his heart into everything he does, whether it's fighting monsters, reading comic books, or simply indulging in his favorite meals. And, given how much he adores you, you're filled with illogical guilt at the thought of preventing Finn from physically expressing his feelings for you.

❥You've already asked him directly. "Finn, are you mad that we haven't done couple things?"

"But we always do couple things."

"No I mean like, tier 15 stuff and all that."

"Oh... Not really.."

❥He's a straightforward and laid-back guy, so it didn't occur to you until lately when, on a day when you didn't feel confident, you pushed yourself to kiss him by placing your hand on his thigh and running it upward. Finn stopped you by holding your hand so he could ask you, "Are you sure you want to do this now?" You try to kiss his neck while saying, "I know you've been dying to-," but Finn is insistent. If there's anything he's learnt from his previous relationship, it's to avoid diving into pleasures on a whim. "It's not about what I want, I'm asking about you." His tone has changed a little bit, especially in light of your earlier question.

❥As self-doubt circles in your thoughts and seeps beyond your eyes, you choose to keep quiet, but Finn squooze-hugs you to his chest. "We don't need to rush anything; I'm pretty happy with you so far. We can do those things when you don't have any more uncertainties in your lovely head."

❥"But what if I do wanna do those things but I want to take it a small step at a time? Like when you taught me how to swim." you bring up. Finn adjusts his hold on you, the two of you were in the middle of a movie night and are currently on the couch. Jake is already asleep and BMO is probably lurking around the treefort but he promised to not peep at you two during visiting hours.

❥"Alright, there's something I can teach ya but we have to keep our voices down. You don't need to take off anything so don't worry, we'll just be using your hands."

❥Finn leans back on the couch's headrest, allowing you to rest on his thighs as he tells you."How about I give you a lesson in Finn-biology?" he chuckles."I can't say no to my favorite subject." you respond. Considering the stories and experiences you've heard from your close friends, you have only a rough idea of what he's considering, but you're nonetheless anxious, intrigued, and interested about it.

❥Finn starts out by smooching you, easing a bit of your nerves as he gently grabs your hand and lowers it down his chest until it reaches his groin, he motions for you to rub him through his shorts, feeling something grow underneath.

❥It's warm, really warm.

❥Finn raises himself from the couch to lower his shorts with his underwear, and you remain silent while watching his half hard dick peeking out from the confines of his baby blue trousers. You temptingly touch his head with the tip of your fingers, unconsciously wrapping more and more of your around around him until he finches a bit, pulling away at the discouragement. "It's okay, it just needs something slick." he assures you. At the mention of it you're unconsciously rubbing your thighs together upon feeling something getting wet downstairs, but you don't bring it up.

❥The attention has Finn squirming in his spot but he continues with the lesson.

"Give me your hand." he asks. When you do he purposely spits on his dick and guides your hand to smear it all over him, amplifying the prominent musky smell coming from him.

"It's sensitive here." he explains in short breaths, hearing his panting picking up the more you run your fingers over the underside of his shaft right where it connects with his pink gland.

❥Once you've gotten the hang of it, Finn releases your hand and lets you try a few more things. What if I squeeze here? What if I touch this tiny hole with my finger? What if I gently squeeze his balls? Finn struggles to form meaningful sentences any longer and is only able to utter things like, "Just like that," "That feels good," and "Wait not like that, there you go... Oh Glob..."

❥It's a hypnotic and undeniably sexy experience, watching him lose himself in his own pleasure to the point where he forgot the reason for this little lesson until he came all over your palm and soiled his own shirt in the process.

[taliskermortem]

so the top/mew sex scene? fascinating. they made so many choices regarding it and i'm honestly intrigued.

((this got way too long so i'm putting it under the cut))

the first thing i noticed was how their scene had almost no noise. it was dead quiet. and the lighting felt almost clinical.

now in comparison to some of the other sex scenes we've seen so far it was... pretty tame. which is fine. but we basically didn't see any of the 'sex'. we got the kissing. and we got the afterglow cuddles. and on top of that... there was no passion.

but let's start from the beginning.

'does this mean i passed your test?' a relationship shouldn't a test. and i think it says a lot about top that that is how he views it. its a challenge. a competition. maybe even a distraction. this has been his goal: get mew to have sex with him. and he's succeeded. but what happens now?

now in comparison to the first time, in episode 1 when they make out in mew's kitchen there are some noticable differences. firstly, their kiss is much more intense. now you can write this off as this kiss being sweet and romantic but... there is so much space between their bodies when they kiss. the only points of contact are their lips and top's hand on the back of mew's head.

then they undress themselves. not each other. top just strips and mew follows suit. the first time, top at least takes mew's shirt off for him. this time he barely touches mew. there's no romantically revealing each other. which is interesting because the first thing top says is: can you see me? can you see what top has revealed to mew. not what mew revealed himself. and mew is all of course i can because he really seems to think he does. but anyway. they're still not even touching.

and then

and THEN

i love you mew

like my dude where did that come from what a line you really just went in for the final kill didn't you. he's serving himself up to you already and you just had to make sure there was nothing left.

and then they are in their boxers kissing. and there is still so much SPACE.

and then top puts mew down on the sofa. now i'm not being funny but there is literally a perfectly functioning massive bed RIGHT THERE. but whatever. who wants comfort? who wants space? who doesnt want to accidentally fall onto the floor? i digress.

they're touching now. finally. but mew is just kind of lying there whilst top does the touching. which, sure, shy virgin. i'll let it slide. hands still above the waist. boxers still on-

afterglow cuddles.

...

that's literally it.

bearing in mind we have seen boston bouncing on this guy's dick.

bearing in mind this is pratically the premise of the show. this is the set up from the very first episode. this is what mew and top have been building up to ever since they met.

and that's it.

anticlimatic.

which... huh, maybe that's the whole point.

this was supposed to be anticlimatic for us because it was for them. because they had both been building up and building up to this and maybe it didn't quite live up to the ideals they both had in their heads.

or maybe its anticlimatic because there's no real feeling. all the other pairings have given us emotions. even if it's one sided pining. even if there's no romantic feels yet, you can feel the potential. you can feel the desire. mew and top's scene was the least passionate of any of the sex scenes. and you could write it off as being sweet and romantic rather than horny. but i don't buy that. i don't feel that.

maybe this is how it always is for top. maybe this was exactly what mew was expecting because he seemed pretty content afterwards, with his i love you and that saccharine smile of his. maybe he doesn't know any better. maybe neither of them do.

but when juxtaposed with the sand and ray scene that follows straight afterwards... those two just have to look at each other and you know they want each other. they kiss and they're both grabbing for each other. sand moves his whole body to be closer. and they're both still fully dressed but i'll be damned if there isn't more feeling packed into that one kiss than into the whole of top and mew's scene.

i just find it interesting that something that was so pivotal to the story. to the characters. was so utterly bland.

and i think it's a very important message to be honest - you can't force romance. you can play by the whole book, follow all the right steps, say all the right lines... but you can't put feelings in where there are none. you can't make passion and love from a prewritten recipe. life is messy. and love is messy. and sex is messy. and trying to keep it neat and ordered and clean, like mew does, just doesn't work.

[fizzy-fuzz]

Hi! I saw that your requests are open? I apologize if this request is a bit too uncomfortable for you.

I would like to request some preferably headcanons of SCP-073 and SCP-076-2 when they find out they have feelings for a (preferably male please, there's too many females out there already ;-;, no offense for the women out there) Researcher? Like how do they deal with it, how long it takes for them to confess, etc?

I am desperate for some SCP-073 x Male!Reader, and SCP-076-2 x Male!Reader cause there's too many Female/Gender-Neutral (but still has female traits for some reason) reader ;-;

AN: Hello! Sorry this took awhile... I honestly kept rewriting this because I wasn't sure how to make this feel like it was written for a man, and not just something vague for everyone.

I added a few headcanons for how they'd treat a male lover over a female, So i hope this is okay for you.

if not I'd love to hear some tips on how to make it better, if you're willing to give feedback <3 (just message me, or send in another ask. I can't reply to comments since this isn't my main account)

SCP-073 (Cain)

⁠You both probably ment pretty casually. Maybe during lunch or just passing by in the hallways.

Cain didn't think much of you at first honestly.

Until he was passing by your office and heard you arguing with another researcher about the ethics of using him as an live information vault.

He stopped for a moment and lingered outside of your office, listening to you rant about how it wasn't fair to him.

He was honestly shocked, in a good way.

Cain was used to people being... Decent to him, sure.

But to have someone so passionately argue his happiness?

Unheard of.

Cain is quick to fall for you after that, and boy does he fall hard.

he deals with these new feelings by following his heart blindly.

Often hanging around you and lending hands wherever he can.

When he works up the courage his confession is sickly sweet, filled with stutters and nervous chuckles.

I also feel like he's the type of guy to write a confession poem.

He's just whipped like that.

If you accept, (which honestly, who would reject him?) He'll be overjoyed!

Man or not, Cain takes the lead in the relationship for the most part.

Throwing an arm around your shoulders, holding doors for you, giving you flowers (plastic, of course)

though, I do think he treats a male lover slightly different then a female.

He's slightly less watchful over you, less protective in general.

It's not that he cares less, just that he's less worried about you.

Also, for some reason I feel like he'd play wrestle with a male lover a lot.

Expect to be put in a gentle/playful headlock.

At the end of the day, Cain is still the sweet golden retriever boy he is.

That definitely doesn't change at all.

SCP-076-2 (Able)

He ment you during one of his rampages, when you got separated from the task force that was escorting you to safety.

Left alone with nothing but a small pistol to defend yourself with.

He quickly gained a large portion of respect for you when you held your ground against him despite being just a researcher.

Not once did you look cowardly or frightened, clutching your guns with a rather good poster and stance, despite your minimal combat training.

Truly a respectable sight to behold.

And Able knows a warrior when he sees one.

In fact, you were so ferocious that he paused his pursuit for just a moment to study you.

A moment long enough for you to shove your gun to his chin and blow his brains out.

I would say that's when the first few sparks flew for him.

After that, every other rampage was spent looking for you, and ending with you putting a bullet through his head.

I don't think he's all that in tune with his feelings, so he definitely doesn't get that what he's feeling is attraction, and not just respect/interest

He's got a thick skull, it takes him awhile...

But when he does realize. he's confused, and a little unsure of himself.

He's really never felt this way about a man before.

He's never felt this way about anyone before.

He's felt pretty much nothing but anger and desire for vengeance for such a long time, that this new feeling is as overwhelming as it is relieving.

I imagine he holes himself up within SCP-076-1 for a few days he learns to deal with these new feelings.

Of course you're the one sent in to confront him about his sudden strange behavior.

Since he's somewhat more docile around you.

This is when he takes his opportunity to confess to you.

Don't expect anything heartfelt or romantic, it's more of a spur-of-the-moment decision then anything.

And don't expect any hints beforehand.

He doesn't get a whole lot of privacy, so he thought it'd be a good spot to do so.

You'd probably be pretty confused i'd imagine, considering you thought he had some sort of bloodlust for you.

Turns out it was a different kind of lust

but we're gonna assume you don't reject his sudden confession, and choose to start a relationship with him.

Contrary to Cain, you're going to have to take the lead with this relationship.

I just can't imagine him being a very confident lover.

Confident in battle yes, but in the art of love? Nah, it's just not happening.

I don't think he'd treat a male lover any differently than a female lover.

I just don't think he's aware of typical relationship "gender norms" like that.

He's just as likely to follow you around frothing at the mouth whenever someone gets to close for his liking as he is a woman.

He's very jealous...

But overall, his dreams for you and him stay the same regardless of gender.

To live somewhere remote where it's just you, him, and his herd of sheep.

[ai-luni]

Love ur NSFW headcanon for Rorke! Never really interested with him till I read ur work!! If u don't mind, could u make one for Keegan?

Keegan Russ NSFW Headcanons

A/N: In keegan we trust.

Word count: 1.5k

I’m just saying, if he ever said “damn kid, who taught you how to do that” I’d actually just lose all my cool and faint. This man’s voice is the epitome of italics

This man may have the hardest shell, but in truth Keegan is a sap. Denial is a river in Egypt, YOUR HUSBANDS A SAP! 

No but truly, he will love you with everything he’s got. And although he may not be able to express it very well outwardly, you can always tell by the way he looks at you. His favourite thing to do is look at you, study you and make you react to things.

This man loves to hold you. His hands are strong and rough and calloused, he loves how they show his hard work and strength and he most definitely loves using them on you. To grip your thighs, your hands, your hair, your neck, your waist, you name it. 

He feels the most confident in his control over his hands and fingers, so he loves to tease and finger you. 

That being said, he also loves the way your hands are the complete opposite to his. smaller and softer, it makes him want to work harder to keep them that way. I think he’d have such an obsession with you giving him handjobs. 

He’d dream of catching you in the act of getting yourself off so he’d be able to join you. Getting each other off at the same time. 

He thinks about whether he would edge you until you came with him or try to make you come as soon as possible and keep going just because he can. He’s definitely thought about being a little goblin and saying you’ll cum together, then pulling away at the last minute. 

He will also kiss the centre of your palm as a form of public affection. 

His movements are always cool, calm and deliberate. He’s alway thinking about where to place his fingers. His kisses are neat, down your jaw and neck he’s kissing to leave a mark or travelling to his next destination. 

And you’ll know what kind of mood he’s in by the way he fucks. If he’s riled up, he plans out deep, rough thrusts. Harder rather than faster. He’ll pump in rough, watching the way your body bounces, your eyes squeezing themself shut as your breath is thrown out of you with a sigh or a choke. Then he’ll take his time pulling out, letting out a strained breath, often forgetting to breathe.

(This man’s love language is an act of service, I won’t take criticism on this. But I feel like if you kept a hand on his chest, monitoring his heart beat or his breath and reminded him to breathe, he would just be so over the moon giddy). 

Whereas, if he’s all passionate and sentimental, he’ll rock into you. Holding your hips and moving you with him. I think he'd love it if you took him this way, him sitting back on his knees, you sitting on his thighs. He’d pray you’ll wrap your arms around his neck as you rest your foreheads together. Keeping your chests pressed onto each other, feeling your little gasps and the vibrations of every moan you let out.

This man also seems like the kind of guy that would love to lay on his side, whether you're on your back or side as well. 

“Atta girl. That’s it.”

I read a fanfic once (If I find it, I’ll link it here) where he slow dances with the reader and she teases him. “What would your team think if they saw you like this?” I: 

1. 100% believe this man loves to slow dance with his partner. Think after he’s taken you out to a nice dinner and returned home, you’ve kicked off your heels and the two of you just sway to music in the dim living room. 

And 2. Believe that if you said that to him, it would set off something feral within him. He definitely has the capability to pound away at you but I think he has too much self control. You’d have to really tease and pull it out of him and show him you want it so bad. 

I think out of all of the ghosts, he’d be the hardest to pull out any kind of intense dominance. I feel like he has the strongest mentality that you die first and foremost for the mission, so he tries to keep as little emotional strings attached to people as possible (Especially after Ajax’s death). So if he did have a partner, it would have to be someone he cares about so so deeply and would want to show that love to constantly.

He checks in with you alot. It’s habitual. If you grunt at a hard thrust he’ll whisper a quiet little “you doing alright love?” If you react favourably to something he does to you, he’d say “You like that? Mmm?” He’ll constantly be purring in your ear without even knowing the kind of effect it has on you. 

Some days, he’ll get home and see you sitting on the couch. In a matter of seconds, he’s already thought out a plan to get you into bed. When he’ll sit down, where he’ll touch you and he’ll anticipate your every response.

The game plan is usually to sit next to you like he’s just had the roughest day, rest his head on the back of the lounge and wait until you climb on top of him and say “let me help you with that baby.”  

If he’s fired up some days, he’ll just put you over his shoulder and take you to the bedroom. Most of the time though, he’ll pick you up and make you straddle him right there on the lounge. 

Keegan also seems to be able to handle(let's be honest, bottle) his emotions the best on the team so I feel like he’d absolutely love just relaxing and cuddling with you. You are the only person he can really strip down to his most vulnerable and he’ll take advantage of that every chance he can. You are his self care. 

When he’s alone at night after a rough day, he’ll only ever think of having a bath with you. Lighting a couple candles, putting in that soapy rainbow thing you always buy that smells like lavender and having you sit between his legs. 

Your warm, soft skin against his chest, hair tickling his nose. The way your eyelashes flutter every time his hands graze your waist. He’ll be mesmerised by your parted lips letting out soft huffs of air, your chest raising in and out of the opaque water as his fingers fiddle with you. The water giving him a good grip to just play with your clit as long as you let him. 

He loves most when you play with his hair. Everything about it he adores. When your fingers twirl around a small tuft, when your nails lightly scrape along his scalp, the soft noise is like asmr to him. This is both when you make love and just in general. When watching tv, when in the car, when at a restaurant. He always wants you to do it and he will always think about you doing it. 

Again if he’s laying in bed at the end of a rough day and is away with you, he might run his own fingers through his hair and pretend it’s you. When he’s desperate enough, he’ll do it when he has to jerk off. He knows he looks like an idiot when he does it but with such a clouded mind, it does absolute wonders in making his hand feel like yours. 

So the lesson learnt today is that if you’re with Keegan, you’ll have to learn pretty quickly how to style his hair. 

Keegan is also a big cockwarmer. Especially if he’s just come in you and is drifting off into a nap, he’d roll onto his back and hold you close to his chest. But also if he’s going over work or you’re going over work and just need to feel close. A relationship with Keegan very much seems like a ‘doing your own thing together’ kind of dynamic most of the time. 

Not nsfw but if you’re not in the military and he’s out on a mission, he or anyone else who knows about you is not allowed to even mutter your name let alone refer to you. Especially if you have children. There's no way he’s taking even the slightest risk of you being found. It might sound cruel to some extent but he is an incredibly disciplined man and the love he feels for you is so deep that to him, this is the only way he’ll truly know that you’re safe. So much so that Walker’s boys don’t even know he has a partner.