#i dont know korean so idk what word they used in the original... but this makes me so crazy.

[warriorfujoshi]

forgive me for unleashing this dark knowledge to the world... but i cant take it any longer. did you guys know greg is canonically kinda thick. yeah. in the english version of liu greg’s uptie story he gets called short...

but in the japanese version...

they specifically use the phrase すんぐりむっくり, which means short and chubby.

oh, and most of the google image results are animals like this. yeah. <3 this old man is cute and round like a wombat, guinea pig or panda. and i love it.

[alphabetboyluvr]

dance with the devil | jjk

REQUEST | jktaee3 on wp

VIBES | angst, royalty - bridgerton vibes, childhood friends to enemies to ?luvrs?

SOUNDTRACK | die for you - joji

HOLLY'S NOTE | (originally posted april 2023) so fun facts, i've never watched bridgerton. i actually put it on in the background as i was writing, which is where the lil line about being diamond comes from. i also do fuck all world-building in this, so just... use your imagination lol. i have no idea if this is like... correct? i dont read nor write period pieces and haven't done since school so.... go easy on me hahaha <33

also!! went for jeongguk instead of jungkook. feels more dramatic? time appropriate?? idk! mix of eng and Korean inspo for titles / locations!!

WORD COUNT | 2.5k

There are easily a hundred pairs of eyes on you as you walk into the ballroom. Maybe more. The room is grand, gilded in gold—grotesque in its display of wealth, but nothing new to you. You've been in a dozen rooms like this within the last month alone. More money than taste—but you can't buy class.

Despite the influx of unwelcome stares, there's just one you can actually feel. It comes from a pair of deep brown eyes in the corner of the room; a glass of red in one hand, the gloved fingers of your least favourite cousin in the other.

Dark and brooding, Jeon Jeongguk has no right to look at you in the way that he does. Duke of Busan, womaniser of more counties than you care to imagine, he's troubled wrapped up in a waistcoat and ruby-encrusted signet rings.

But you've always liked trouble. Shame.

The grip that Lord Min of Daegu has on your hand tightens. He can notice it too; Jeongguk's stare. Your satin gloves are silky against Lord Min's skin, and he must admit he enjoys being the focus of Jeon Jeongguk's envy. He thinks it's about time that the over-egotistical tyrant of hearts had his comeuppance.

"Remember," Lord Min whispers quietly to you as the crowd watches on. He's a trusted confidant; not suited for marriage. At least not with you. It's the county's worst-kept secret that he retires to the boudoir with Master Park each and every evening. No one at the ball is under any illusion that he is a suitor of yours. "You're a diamond in a mine of sapphires."

"Oh, but sapphires are far prettier than diamonds," you pout, voice dulcet as you scan the room. It's approaching your birthday, and time is running out. A suitor needs to be found, and found promptly. Too much time squandered on frivolous pursuits during your youth had prevented such a search.

It's something you're reminded of whenever your eyes catch Jeongguk's. Endless days spent under beating midsummer sunshine; burnt skin and freckled cheeks. Youth well-spent. Youth wasted.

"So? It matters not." Lord Min smiles. "Diamonds are far stronger. Sharper. And still just as exquisite as sapphires. Do not sell yourself short."

And by that, you know exactly what he implies: steer clear of the Duke of Busan.

It would be a fruitless endeavour. No good would come from it.

Years of your childhood had been spent in a whimsical land with him, full of castles and fairies, and witches and warlocks. Potions had been made in his garden using his mother's best perfumes and items stolen from the pantry; make-believe scenarios came to life in the forest between your family's estates.

Summers had been frittered away together by the sea; Winterton Manor the backdrop of your dreams, your hopes, your fears.

But the Duke did as Dukes so often do; embroiled himself in debauchery and distasteful pleasures.

You had watched on, bemused for the most part, and also intrigued by what compelled him.

Had you not been enough?

Grapevines whisper, and Jeongguk had spent far too much time frolicking in vineyards. Drunk on the delights of his youth, he'd forgotten that there would be life beyond the present.

It's a price he pays, now. A debt he hadn't realised he had racked up.

One that he's reminded of every single time you glance his way. He cannot afford a diamond.

Somehow, however, he can seem to afford the audacity of approaching you in the powder room towards the end of the evening.

You've had lacklustre dances with half a dozen bachelors, and they've all been uninspiring. Only two of them managed to make it through the waltz without stepping on your toes.

Time is running out.

And Jeongguk?

He's running in circles trying to get you out of his head.

Seems apt that he'd bump into you at some point.

Not like he sought you out. Not at all.

Not like he handed the maids by the staircase a few silver coins to divert other partygoers elsewhere, either. He wouldn't dream of doing such a thing.

The Duke of Busan knows you well.

Knows that it takes all of your might to not glance in his direction as he makes his presence known.

"Really?" He asks with a cocked brow and arrogant smirk, leaning against the doorframe. You're preening at your hair. Making sure your pins remain in place. "That's what you chose to wear? To a ball of this grandeur?"

You're wearing white. It's tight against your chest. Too tight. Pleated beneath the satin ribbon under your bust, encrusted with sequins and finished with lace. It's beautiful. Matches the white satin gloves that finish just above the crease of your elbow. You carry yourself with elegance.

In fact, your posture is so well-poised that Jeongguk is the only attendee of the ball who has noticed the split in your skirt. When stood, it is hidden by the pleats. When dancing, it is camouflaged by the lace. When you lift your skirt to meander up the stairs? He becomes reacquainted with the curve of your ankle. The split is no larger than the length of a letter inviting him to tea, but it feels overwhelmingly large.

As far as the Duke is concerned, you may as well be wearing lingerie.

You smooth the skirt of your dress and consider rearranging your tits just to give him something to stare at. You decide against it. Think he would enjoy it far too much.

"Oh precisely," you respond with an equally arrogant grin, before turning to face him. You're haughty in the way you position your body, almost as if you're trying to entice him. "Haven't you heard? I've a suitor to find."

He scoffs. "And you think dressing like a whore is going to find you one of any value?"

A whore.

Very rich of him, you think, as if the entire party doesn't know what he gets up to in the dark. And the daylight. And just about any time of the day, actually.

What they really don't know?

That he used to get up to it with you.

"Absolutely not," you smile. Your father might want you married off, but there's no suitor here for you. Not tonight. If you have to bring a man home, it unquestionably has to be one that your father won't approve of. "That's the point—although, now I come to think of it—this dress did seem to find you, didn't it, Jeongguk?"

He stays quiet for a moment. He doesn't enjoy you being correct. It's part of the reason you bicker so much. You're always correct.

"White really isn't your colour," he tells you with an ambivalent shrug. "We both know that."

Innocence. Purity. Virginity.

For once, The Duke is correct. It really isn't your colour.

Humorous, how he's dressed head to toe in black. Perhaps you should be, too.

"And green isn't yours," you tease, walking towards him. "Yet you seemed to be full of it when I entered the ballroom with the Lord of Daegu."

He remains silent. Can sense you have more to declare.

"Moreover," you hum, proving him right as you pause beside him, "as I'm sure you're well aware, Duke, it's the colour beneath the dress that counts."

"And what is beneath the dress?" Jeongguk husks, not looking over towards you. He doesn't want to let you know how much you affect him, still.

"The same lace that greeted you last summer in the stables of Winterton Manor."

Red. Fuck.

His favourite.

"Tell me, Duke," you tease. He deserves it, you think. "Does the Viscount of Gwangju like red?"

"Hoseok?" Jeongguk scoffs, addressing him by name, not title. The lack of respect shown by the young Duke is asinine, truly. A show of his immaturity. "Despises it."

Truthfully, he has no idea of Viscount of Gwangju's preferences.

"Good," you taunt. "I'm enthralled by the prospect of a challenge."

Jeongguk will be damned if you end up betrothed to the Viscount of fucking Gwangju.

"He concedes easily," he says. This is another lie. He just doesn't want to give you any further ideas. "Do not expect a challenge. Anticipate disappointment."

"Oh, but Duke," you laugh and it's so exquisite that he thinks he might just melt. "Disappointment has always been your forte, has it not?"

During the balls of recent years, where Jeongguk would only ever offer his hand to other women, and never you? Yes. Disappointing.

In the smoky parlours, where he laughs and jokes with the other gentlemen, about which debutantes are simply destined to become spinsters? Oh, incredibly disappointing.

In the drawing room adjacent to his bedroom, while you had waited beneath his sheets for his return, as he was agreeing to court your cousin instead of you? Perhaps the most disappointing he'd ever been.

It's been a year—the worst of your life.

"You've made your bed, Duke. Sleep in it."

"I've tried," he says sternly. He doesn't want to joke any more. Doesn't want to flirt. "I cannot bear to sleep in it without you."

You shake your head. Such a devil.

"You seem well rested enough."

"It's a facade."

And you find yourself quite annoyed; frustrated by his apparent disdain for a life he chose. A destiny brought upon you both by his inability to be discreet—though you're unaware of this caveat.

You see, everyone does know of his reputation, but he always kept your pursuits of passion hidden. Private. To the world, you're pristine.

"What do you require, Duke? My pity?"

He knows he doesn't deserve it.

"I require nothing of you."

"Then seek me out no longer. Do not pursue what you cannot commandeer, Jeongguk."

It's a lesson he would have done well to learn many moons ago; one remembered by you even if it was lost on him.

And yet, at quarter past twelve, as he loosens the black satin bow of his collar in his bedroom, Jeongguk pauses.

A knock has just sounded at his door. His chambermaid, he assumes, just checking on the fire—or maybe Master Park's chambermaid, instead (though Jeongguk's business with Master Park's staff isn't ever entirely 'business').

Regretfully, he thinks it could be Lord Kim Namjoon of Ilsan, here to reprimand him for his manners. His mentor in all fashions, Namjoon is always the first to discipline the young Duke following his nights of debauchery—though all things considered, he feels he's been quite well-behaved tonight.

He sighs as he rests a palm flat against his bedpost, and bellows, "Enter."

A sternness settles on his brows, hard and uncompromising, as he turns to the door. There's a dishevelled nature to his hair, undone and falling slightly over his dark eyes. His loosened collar and unbuttoned waistcoat only aid to make him look even more rugged.

He's marred in vulnerability, though. His pretty pink lips rest ajar, as his eyes fall on the intruder of his thoughts.

Amusing, you think, how the bedroom is where he domineers best, and yet is always where he seems the most unfortified.

Perhaps he hadn't been lying about his facade.

Perhaps he really doesn't sleep well without you.

Perhaps—just perhaps—you might indulge him one last time.

"Tell me, Duke"— You walk into his room and close the door behind you, eyes not leaving his —"Do any of them compare?"

He watches you strut past him and crawl on the luxe quilt on his bed. Oh, how you've missed it.

"Any of who?"

"The maids," you shrug. You aren't naive. You know exactly what he does, and who he does it with. "Master Park's maids? Surely Lord Kim's, too. And the working girls. The debutantes—need I go on?"

"No," he says, watching as you loosen your heels and kick them to the floor. They land with a thud. He knows the noise will have echoed throughout the house. "You needn't."

The truth of the matter is that his escapades are well-known amongst high society. He has a reputation, which is why his courtship with your cousin was forced upon him.

You're surely too good for him, but he's of too much value to remain without an heir.

A marriage is needed for him before the end of the year. His father says so.

Contrarily, your father would never agree to the Duke of Busan proclaiming you as his Dutchess.

Jeongguk knows this, for he's already asked.

Of course he has.

Last spring. Kept his mother's ring in his pocket just in case. A proposal was planned for early summer, before your trip to Paris.

He thought perhaps he would go with you—a pre-honeymoon, maybe—but your father had refused his request for your hand, and who was Jeongguk to go against the will of the man who had raised you?

Jeongguk won't burden you with this knowledge. Your life will be far more fruitful if you remain silently furious with him for never giving you what you deserved.

"And do they?" You enquire once more. unaware of his anguish. "Do they compare?"

Jeongguk leans down to his boots. Unties his laces and stands on his heels to remove them. He kicks them away. Is just as undressed as you are. Equal.

"Do you think my bed would be empty right now if they did?"

"It isn't empty," you tease.

"No," he acknowledges. "But it has been. It's been empty for months."

"Months?"

You don't believe him.

"I've had an empty bed since I returned from Winterton last summer," he declares.

"Though your hands have been full?" You sneer, painfully reminded of the way he'd held the hand of another woman in the ballroom that evening. You've had to bear witness to it on multiple occasions by now. It never gets any easier. Your fucking cousin, of all people.

"Pay no mind to the fact my hands have not been empty in ballrooms," he speaks quietly, shame washing over his features. Yes, it would be far more desirable if you were to be furious with him, but he wants to alleviate the hurt that you are quite clearly encumbered with. "As I said, it's a facade."

"Why? What are you hiding, Duke?"

As if you don't know—he laments—that I'm utterly besotted with you.

He glances away from you to watch the fire as it crackles in his hearth. He wonders if it would be less painful to tear his heart from his chest and roast it in the flames, than it is to be in love with you.

"I hide nothing from you," he says with a broad smile as he turns to face you once more. Jeongguk is adept at falsifying his discretions. "But I am without at a dance."

You grin, now. "A dance?"

"I'd love one," he smirks as he holds out his hand. He twists your words almost as elegantly as he used to twist you around on empty ballroom floors; just two of you after the parties had died down and the revellers had hung up their dancing shoes.

He strides to the side of the bed. Satisfaction sinks into his features when your gloved hand slips into his palm. He pulls you up. Pulls you closer. Rests a hand upon your waist and positions himself perfectly for you. He was raised a gentleman after all, even if grew up to be a rogue.

"May I have this dance?" He says quietly, only needing to whisper.

You're so close you probably count the beat of his heart.

One, two.

Does anyone dance better than I do?

Three, four.

Do you lose your breath when someone else draws you closer?

Five, six.

I could dance with you forever.

Seven, eight.

Would that be agreeable?

Nine, ten.

As if you can read his thoughts, you just nod.

"You may."

[bozepomagaj]

i was 15 when i watched made in abyss as well, finished the 1st season and promptly never touched it again because of what i learned about the author. From what ive seen from koreans they say that the version shown on korean tv is censored (which sounds plausible) which could mean that the weird parts that we skip may be cut out entirely(?dont quote me on that idk) soobin is on thin ice cause the 2nd season is worse and taeyong is in deep shit because i dont think there is any reason why someone should own the manga😟

I'mma preface this by saying I completely get everyone who couldn't stomach this series. It contains a lot of disturbing topics and at the end of the day, it's a horror series, of course not everyone is gonna be able to handle that, and again that's fine. But I can also say that this arc was surprisingly handled with a lot of care, wasn't fetishized nor glorified just... disturbing. Think of Outlast 2 or the ending of Amnesia:Rebirth.

TLDR:

Second season is way more disturbing but not as sexual in nature and Soobin most likely was talking about the fight scenes when saying how cool it was. And if he wasn't then who knows what he was yapping about, don't know him personally so I can't put words into his mouth unless he says something. As for Taeyong, can't defend him at ALL but calling him a p3d0 would still be a bit too much for me.

AND I wanna add after further investigation, Mingi said he didn't even watch it and instead dropped it because it was too much for him, so there's that.

For a more in depth explanation, here you go:

I'm gonna have to explain the lore in order for you all to understand this FULLY, so heres a summary:

The arc introduces us to Vueko, a victim of trafficking who was thrown into the Abyss with the rest of the now villagers because she wasn't deemed as someone useful. So obviously, when she meets Irumyuui, who has been exiled from her village for not being able to give birth at the age of 8, she immediately takes her in. As a victim, she understands her, and the author explains how, through helping Irumyuui, Vueko is able to heal her own trauma and heal Irumyuui as well. It's extremely well written, and as a fellow victim, there was something so sweet about seeing someone heal with the help of another. Especially when that someone acted like a mother figure. But of course, this is the Abyss. The point of the Abyss is that despite you thinking there's some light at the end of the tunnel, there isn't. Wazukyan takes that away, and Irumyuuis wish backfires (think of it like the wishes in Madoka, you get what you want but at a cost), and she gets turned into a horrible monster. But despite everything, she's happy because to her, she's fulfilled her purpose.

This is the part that I could discuss for hours because to me, it was commentary on how young girls even nowadayas are convinced by others that 'they have to find a man one day' and how having no kids is looked down upon. Especially in 3rd world countries. I could write an entire essay, but we're not here to do that.

I can tell you immediately that none of this was fetishized nor glorified in an yway, it's just supposed to make you feel absolutely empty because again, author is really trying to push that "oh you think you got the good end of the stick? Think again!" The manga if FILLED with situations like this, from Rico's origins to Nanachis arc, the subplot of this entire manga is 'how far are you willing to go to survive?'. Think of it like Fire Punch. Disturbing? Yeah, I mean, even I had to drop it once they began talking about trafficking women. Once again, I am comparing it to Madoka Magica but far more gruesome. Nothing explicit was shown, Irumyuui's private parts were never exposed, and her giving birth was also never shown. Her transformation WAS shown, but it's your basic body horror, like in most Junji Ito works.

SO, obviously if you're not a fan of the horror/seinen genre this is deeply disturbing and fucked but after seeing games like Outlast 2 and Amnesia: Rebirth, I wasn't as disturbed PERSONALLY. Again, recommending this publicly might've not been the smartest idea because you really do have to be into the horror genre to be able to handle topics like that. Even I just had to sit in silence for a couple hours after reading that backstory cuz damn, it hits you right in the feels. And most of the manga past that part just has badass fight scenes and when people praise it, they usually talk about that. From what I saw it was well animated and lots of clips were shared on tiktok, twitter etc. So there's a big chance he was talking about that.

(Examples of why people were hyping it up, even non-fans who had no idea about the series were going crazy because of this fight scene)

Now as for Taeyong... see now the reason I didn't mention him in the original post is because of that specific thing. I love the series and have come across physical copies of the manga but I know damn well I'm not buying cuz I don't wanna be seen supporting the author, purely out of spite. And saying 'oh well maybe he didn't know what the author is like'. Unlike some sites, physical copies DO include the extra chapters which contain stuff like this:

Totally unnecessary, not relevant to the plot and while some say it was added as a "haha funny joke" c'mon now. Let's use our brains. Now, would I call him a p3d0? Absolutely not. Would he be weird for this? To me, yeah. For anyone reading this, it's up for you to decide. I'm only here to answer questions about the series because I see people saying random stuff and making it seem FAR more worse just cuz they saw a couple tags.

[mothmage]

20 Qs for fic writers

Tagged by @monstersinthecosmos , thank you!!!

1. How many works do you have on A03? 31 (and a few anon, i think 2 or 3. idk, when i post a fic on anon i forget about it forever)

2. What’s your total Ao3 word count? 446,135

3. What fandoms do you write for? currently/primarily vc, iwtv (amc), star wars, and merlin (bbc)!

4. What are your top five fics by kudos? A Lovely Little Normal Life (which, honestly, kind of annoys me lol. i know it's just bc it's a huge fandom, but really? the stupid little 12k harry potter fic i wrote in two days is my most kudos? please...); Arthur Pendragon, Long May She Reign (forever pushing my lesbian genderswap agenda); The Face of God (les mis slightly canon divergent javert character study); The Odyssey of Recollection (amc iwtv s1 pov armand); Away From Stranger Tides (potc philip/syrena fic i started ages ago and never finished, lol)

5. Do you respond to comments? yes i love talking to people in comments!!!! i've made a lot of friends through comments!!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? omg. umm. merthur fans don't know this yet bc i havent finished posting but it's arthur pendragon long may she reign (BUT it's part of a series, so it's literally fine). idk, i dont tend to write long fics that end angsty. but my angstiest fic in general is probably Hollow-Boned Boy (armand contemplating his human life in the early CoD era) or Vision of the Damned (daniel's turning from armand's pov)

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? i love a happy ending!! my series Odysseus in White Silk is probably the happiest ending, and in such an undeserved way hahaha it's so very AU because i was sad after s1 of the show and just wanted them all (and armandaniel) to live happily ever after

8. Do you get hate on fics? i dont think i ever have, but i tend to read comments in good faith too, so maybe someone out there is annoyed that i interpreted their vague dislike comment as a genuine comment or something, idk. in general though, i'll say no

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? yes but i dont post that often, idk if there's a particular kind, but generally it tends to be a little rougher than is probably appropriate without discussion in real-life situations, but also very...idk my friend described it as very tender, like theyre very clearly in love. which is so funny considering that that kind of tenderness irl gives me fucking hives lmfao

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? oh wow, not in a long time. i do have a wip sitting around rn that's a crossover between london spy and cloud atlas, which is really crazy until you remember that ben whishaw is in both london spy and the cloud atlas movie lol. and cloud atlas is already about weird reincarnations and parallel worlds and stuff, so it isnt too out-there.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? i dont think so!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? yes!! The Face of God was translated into Korean by ao3 user Crescent919 !! i've had a few comments on other fics asking to translate for personal use (always yes, of course), but no one else has asked to share a translation publicly

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? no!! i've been thinking about it lately though

14. What’s your all time favorite ship? all-time? probably merlin/arthur from merlin (bbc). it's the whole fate-destiny-choice thing, it just compels me like nothing else

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? hmmm, i would like to finish Roswell -- well, kinda (agent carter farm girl / alien crash landing au) because i still have all the original notes and outlines and stuff. i also made a shitty conlang when i was first writing it, which is crazy lol. but it would need some pretty serious revisions, and i would definitely rewrite the first few chapters that i posted years ago. i just kind of lost the agent carter bug, but i might return to that fic if i ever get in the mood for it again.

16. What are your writing strengths? ooh, i'm not really sure! i get a lot of comments mentioning characters' voices and/or personalities, so i would say maybe that!!! i also feel that i'm fairly good at mimicking an author's writing style when i want to (notably, i do not mimic anne rice when writing vc fic, lol)

17. What are your writing weaknesses? editing for sure. i have at least a hundred fics sitting on my hard drive fully or almost-fully written that i just need to edit. but i would simply rather die than do all of that. it's also why my whole merlin fic got put on pause while i went down the vc rabbithole, because i just can't bring myself to go edit the next chapters lol

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? hmm, i think it's usually unnecessary and comes off as a bit silly. that said, i did do it once (maybe excessively) in Daniel Molloy, Time Bandit (1984 daniel ends up in 1794 theatre des vampires, it's more of a character study than a time travel fic) BUT, let me defend myself -- i did it because daniel doesnt understand french, it's his pov, and he's incredibly confused and distraught for most of the fic. i felt like the dialogue being in french conveyed this sort of "daniel does not belong in this time/place" vibes. but, also, my french is...a little rough. so i'm sure it's an annoying fic for french readers lmao

19. First fandom you wrote for? warriors cats, a million years ago hahahah

20. Favourite fic you’ve written? ok, i have three different answers for this. the fic i think is the best, objectively, in terms of writing and content: The Story of Dani [...] (r63 devil's minion from armand's pov, starting with lestat's house). the fic i am the proudest of, mostly because it was my first "big" fic (it's funny now, bc it's only 41k) and i feel like i grew a lot as a writer while working on it, and i'm still happy with it: The Face of God (les mis pov javert, character study from childhood). the fic i have the most fun with and think about almost 24/7: Arthur Pendragon, Long May She Reign (r63 merthur, canon divergence, this is like a 4-part series that's currently over 300k lmao)

no-pressure tagging: @aunteat @leslutdepointedulac @butchybats @graygiantess and anyone else who wants to!!

[astrolaurical]

I was scrolling though your page when a question popped up in my head dose namjoon hold unconscious colorist beliefs because I know in previous interviews he said he liked pale skin when asked about ideal types skin tone and from your last post since hwasa is one of the suspects (and she is clearly dark in Korean standards) I was wondering what type of view he as towards a potential lovers skin tone especially since he make bad comments towards v and jhopes skin tone in the past

And idk if you know about some men that date women lighter then them to have lighter kids (I don’t think this would be namjoon but just to give context in what I am thinking)

So I was wondering what type of mindset he has currently has it changed as it stayed stagnant? In the context of what he has said in the past?

I would have no idea what current mindset he has because I’m not in his mind.

He has apologized for those old comments and has since shown growth by actively supporting BLM and AAPI causes.

RM himself received a lot of hate from Koreans because of how “dark” he is so I think he was projecting his self-hatred onto his members in that video clip. I do hope he apologized to them. (The original video where he is being colorist to jhope and v is the BTS in Melbourne 2015 interview. They have reuploaded the video and cut out his colorist statement so I had to find a video that had the OG clip).

Korea is extremely racist (they just do a good job at hiding it). Hell, they even have their own word for the n-word. Jimin himself is guilty of saying it. The standard of beauty is also extremely strict and damn near unattainable in Korea. One of the qualities is to be pale. Most male idols (used to, it is getting better and interviewers don’t ask these questions much anymore bc sexist) state that they do want a pale, feminine, short partner because those fit the qualities of Korean women… people they are around and see everyday in a homogeneous society.

I would like to think Namjoon would date anybody he vibes with regardless of looks, but I DONT KNOW THIS MAN, ONLY HIS PUBLIC PERSONA. He could be a complete asshole behind the scenes and be completely different from what we all expect.

[djxiao]

also there was never a mention of taemin having to transfer because he was facing harassment in the army in any news source , it was only due to his worsening mental health which could have worsened for a multitude of reasons , there were even anonymous soldier ops who vouched for him and defended him from people saying it was an excuse to get out of military service, saying nice things about him. So Idk where that came from. Also that post seemed really culturally insensitive like, in my country abolishing the military n forced military service might be a good thing, in Op's country it might be a good thing, but in a country who's next door neighbor is North Fucking Korea ? A country who had a re-unification war in very recent history that wrecked the country and that never really ended ? It's much more complicated. I've always hated the violence, homophobia and abuse that goes on in the Korean military from hearing about it in documentaries, but that all seemed to be a non-issues that people didn't think affect idols until BTS 'turn came. Also LITERALLY today there was a video of several male idols dancing to Hypeboy on a military talent showcase, military men do girl group covers n skits, so it doesn't seem like the awful aspects of the military system are universal and there is no space where famous guys who dance and sing for a living can be respected and live in peace. 

okay so as far as what exactly op said about taemin i cant remember anymore because i blocked them and im not going to go back and check their exact wording but iirc there were rumors of taemin getting bullied and harassed but we dont know if any of that was true. what we do know is he was transferred because his mental health was suffering and it was determined after some evaluations that it wasnt suitable for him to remain in his original position so they transferred him. claims that it was to get out of service is ridiculous because as i said it was determined by the military themselves that he wasnt fit to continue and also because switching to public service means a longer enlistment period. regardless of taemin's situation, it is totally inappropriate to use his personal problems as a gotcha especially when 1- it was only announced because it HAD to be announced otherwise people would have found out from somewhere else and taemin/sm would have had no control over even more rumors being spread about him. it's not like he wanted his personal business being publicized but they had no choice but to get ahead by making the announcement first with the correct information. 2- the troops (obviously not all, but a very loud group of them) view their meow meows as above kpop (thus why they should be exempt and other idols shouldnt be) so why are they using a kpop idol AND this idol in particular when some of those fans mocked him for the very reason theyre now using him? 3- there's a history of them exploiting the trauma shinee has been through to show how the kpop industry is terrible and evil and now they've found a new hardship of shinee's to exploit for their baby beetleeboops 4- its none of their business

as for cultural insensitivity, i think its complicated. south korea needs defense against their neighbor yes but forcing unwilling participants to join the military is still wrong. two things can be true at once. it's also important to acknowledge that it's due to us imperialism (my and lots of armchair's country) that got everything to the point where the conflict is so prolonged that the sk government even needs to maintain the draft to this day.

the violence/homophobia/abuse is not exclusive to the military and is a much larger societal issue that needs to be fixed. but its so true that many of their fans didnt give a shit about other idols having to enlist or any other korean enlisting for that matter. like they literally made fun of minseok for getting stationed in the dmz. but now that their darling tannies are enlisting its suddenly a problem. in fact up until now it seems the main narrative was that all other idols are flops and will never reach the level of the boops so they deserve getting drafted but their boy scouts are special and different so they shouldn't have to go through what every other man in the country goes through.

i saw that video of the soldiers dancing and thats pretty commonplace. as for individual idols and how theyre treated it defintiely depends who's in their unit with them, but just because the military has concerts with male idols getting to perform and bringing in girl groups to sing and dance it doesnt mean its always like that every day and so it isnt so bad in there. like those concerts are literally morale boosters..

[uiruu]

i hate that 박 is romanized Park cause like... at least 김 being “Kim” instead of “Gim” fits the pronunciation better, and 이 and 최 being “Lee” and “Choi” respectively instead of “I” and “Choe” respectively fit the etymology of those names (the surname 이 originally was 리 and still is in north korea i believe, and 최 was originally pronounced so that it rhymed with the english word “boy”, though they have both changed to their current pronunciations over time. 이 is pronounced “ee” and 최 is pronounced “chwe”)

but the “ar” vowel in Park....

i know why it’s there. it’s because romanization of Korean was mostly done by speakers of British English, i’m pretty sure, and since those dialects are largely non-rhotic (the r-sound is not pronounced at the end of a syllable, though it leaves traces on the vowel so that “shirt” isnt pronounced like “shit” even though the r has been deleted. the vowel has been changed by the r, and then the r disappears, leaving only the changed vowel), “Park” is pronounced like “Pahk” or something. the English language doesn’t have the same a-sound that’s in Korean, at least not in most dialects of English, so pronouncing 박 like “pack” or “pock” or something... isn’t quite right, you know? in British English (or any non-rhotic English), “Park” is fairly close to 박, because the “ar” vowel is close to ㅏ (though not exactly the same). 

but like, my dialect is rhotic. i pronounce r at the end of a syllable. the fact that it’s spelled with an r in English leads to Americans pronouncing that surname like the English work “park”, with the r-sound that just isn’t there at all in Korean. American English isn’t the only rhotic variety of English obviously, the English language in general used to pronounce every r (that’s why they’re there in the first place lol), it’s just that the upper class dialect of British English lost the r in that position, while many other dialects kept it. working class British English and Irish English often have r’s. 

so... yeah, idk. it’s just strange. the standard romanization would romanize it “Bak” but i would accept “Pak” too since that’s closer to the pronunciation. the plain a-sound is not something that’s in any native English words (i’m talking about the sound /a/. English has /æ/ as in “trap” and /ɑ/ as in “palm”, and the “park” vowel is generally the same one as “palm” in non-rhotic accents) but the /a/ vowel is something English speakers can get to learn, you know? it’s in like almost every other language, it’s one of the most if not the most common vowel in the world and it’s frankly kind of odd that English changed it into those other vowels. if you learn any other language, chances are you’ll learn this vowel. hopefully English speakers who learn Spanish dont pronounce “gracias” with the “gras” part rhyming with “boss” or something, or the British pronunciation of “grass” and “class”, when actually speaking Spanish... what I’m saying is that it’s not hard for English speakers to learn how to pronounce Pak, but Park is misleading for English speakers who speak rhotic dialects. 

[thesnottedbrat]

The Difference

K-wave became more trending globally these years (thanks BTS), another culture also raise to the surface in reading section (manhwa and novel). Korean manhwa and novel popularity are quite significant these recent years, to the point the author and published take a legal action to protect their babies from ilegal translation. Hence, right know, we’re in the middle of their purgatory.

Back then, i dont really read manhwa diligently, but i know some people already fangirling about it. I was a devoted believer of manga, heck, my reading list was full of it. Fast forward, my hot list mangas been hiatus or the scans team being MIA (due lacking translator/staffs) or simply we waiting for the next chapter coming up which takes weeks/months (you know, some mangas published weekly, monthly or bimonthly, but some of them are publish every 4months! yeah right, talk about forever).

Out of boredom, i give several manhwas a try (its been on roll for months and many people in forum talked about it, so lets give it a try), and im hooked. 

I remember the first manhwa i read was a BL manhwa with silver hair guy with a super power as the ML (forgot its name), and the MC is his childhood friend with black hair. The artysyle totaly catching my eyes fast. Its colorful but i have a slight difficulties with how to read.

You know, manga are black and white page (ofc there’s one with colors as well), and 1 page are contained (normally) with 3-6 panels, and you read it from right to the left. But with manhwa you have to do the opposite. Its a long strip comics with lots of white area, and you read it from left to the right.

Im also check several manhua out there. My first manhuwa is 10 years where i loved you the most. DAMN MAN! i love this manhua so freaking much!! i even read the novel!!! totally a tear jerker!!!

And ever since, i imersing myself to read more manhwa and manhua (but not much) LOL. 

And i give the novels a reading too. But after some time, i found a patterns. 

This writing is based on my personal opinions, so no hard feelings, ok?

My preferences are:

something with heavy-twisted theme (but not too dark nor gorey)

easy fluffy romance is okay too

picky with omegaverse things (cus yk...)

family theme is okay (i loved it actually, as long as its not too childish)

comedy is fine, but too much are down for me

regular shounen/shoujo theme is acceptable

something full with angst/sad kind of thing is my fave!

war and strategy things are okay too

mysteries, detective/police theme is fine

supernatural stuffs is good once a while

Well i guess, my preference is okay, I mean, i dont like things that too complicated or too cheesy. It just blow the entire plot.

Im also fine where the MC is died, i mean, several stories are meant to do so (imo). We cant be perfect all the time, even fictional stories need some real life situation hard. I think this kind of ending is beautiful and more humane.

Korean Novel

Blame me for my limited reading list. But from what i read so far, the only novel i liked was Trash of the Count Family. Most of k-novel i read, were, how do i say this.. they’re just okay? 

Plot wise, i see no difference one from another, and i want more conflict happened. Maybe the author and published targeted the young audience, so i cant really blame them. 

But, from what i know, Shadow Queen had good characters conflict and the characters also develop by their own pace (quite slow, but i guess its the way supposed to be).

But come to think of it, i never found BL novel? Letme check on it again.

Korean Manhwa

Most of the artystle are cute and nice, but thats it. Most of published (popular) manwha in girls sections were novel based (adaptation), its a common things and sometimes they differentiate from the original plot. Meanwhile the BL sections apparently were original (not adaptation). 

I dont know why but instead cultivated more artists to make novel adaptation, why dont asked them to create their own story? I think its more interesting that way and to make more vast genre available out there.

Plus thing : they published it weekly, with hiatus schedule for several months and continue the next chapter (repeat). Needless to say, they can finished a book/projects fast.

Japan Novel

Well, i have a love-hate relationship with this. Most of them able to portray the deep of characters emotions well, and the plot development was. But what i hated is sometimes (or mostly?) they spinning in the wheels and using the same words for god knows many times. 

Japan Manga

Allright, old artifacts, who doesnt read this stuffs? Do i have to write it down?

My first book story, ever. And i still read it till now. The most vast collection out there, and the most easy to obtain book. Not every manga are colorful (they printed the colorfull ver as a limited edition/collection edition), they printed it in bw to reduce the production cost.

Manga is the opposite of manhwa in terms of creating stories. The mangka works as a story teller as well as the artist. Not everyone tho, but most of them. 

What i hate: their published date! URGH. As i stated previously, their published date is sucks! several publisher have different release schedule. Some of them published weekly, monthly or bimonthly. I can wait for it. For some of them publiisedh every 4months! 4 months for 1 chapter!! So it means, you only have 4 chapters A YEAR!! Emerald sucks!

I dont even bother to keep tabs with Super Lovers or Sekaiichi Hatsukoi.

Chinese Novel

imo, the only worth reading is their BL novel. If i were you, dont even bother to read other novels, it was just a long series of  cheap soap drama with evil cycle. Sooooo fed up i cant even say anything. Ok, maybe not everything,  To Be A Virtuous Wife is a good read, or my all time fave 10 Years When I Loved You The Most (BL), or every MXTX works is superb! I recommend this very much!

But i have to admit, i loved how Ch author using a flowery language, thats what hooks me the most.

The common things are mentioned below:

daddy CEO with super smart genius kid and superb beauty wife

imortal heavenly being, mostly reincarnated

harem life turns one devoted lovers

rape and violence

like normal occurrences

genius hacker

unmatched beauty

The thing is, the MC is way too OP (either physically or mentally) which i dont like. So i dropped several stuffs.

Chinese Manhua

Plot wise, i dont really like it. I mean, they’re just okay, but its not drove me to the point where i have to catch up with it. But, i must say, their artstyle is quite charming. The authors have a tendecy to make their artystyle into painting like, idk but i got that vibe.

[kpop-stole-my-sanity]

Insomnia // Hwang Hyunjin [bulleted scenario!]

Summary: In which you and Hyunjin are both too oblivious to realize your true feelings... until it’s too late? 

Genre: angsty, floooof, gender neutral 

Word Count: 2175

Warnings: Just some cursing 

A/N: This is my first time writing a bulleted scenario and i quite enjoyed it :) idk it’s fun to not care about settings too much and punctuation and stuff. I also liked adding my own little dumb remarks here are there :PP it was fuN! This was another scenario that kinda arose while i was napping i hope you guys enjoy it! <3 i love stray kids 

i’m also gonna try to make all my scenarios gender neutral from now on (unless specifically requested) b/c we are all about inclusivity here !! :)

This was originally gonna be like a real fic

But the writers block was REAL like i really tried to set the scene and everything

But it didn’t turn out right

And i really wanted to get this one out so HERE WE ARE TRYING THE BULLETED SCENARIO OKAY YAY LETS BEGIN!

Trainee au!! Kinda :D

Like skz didnt go through the survival show yet

Ok so SEtting thE SCeNe~~~~

You just walked into the jyp building bc jyp hired you as a new producer

Like to study under him and potentially help w producing in the future

Like jyp 2.0 ya know

Jyp meets w you himself bc you’re like a prodigy

And a foreigner so he thought you’d be more comfortable w him speaking toyou in english :D

So he explained what you gotta do during your training period

Like studying more about composition and production

Learning korean to more easily communicate w idols and what not

And also honing your own style and figuring out who you are as an artist

So he pairs you up w the trainees bc it be good practice

More specifically skz bc they seem to have a more flexible style

Also like he thought it would be good for you to work w chan and the rest of 3racha

Like bc yall around the same age

And it helps you become more comfy

And familiar w the company and the producing rooms and recording studios and what no

Like

Yer

And then like

Through working w them to produce a song for the trainee showcase

Yall get mad close

And like

You have your eyes on hyunjin from the start

Like bc who couldn’t

Like

Gorgeous boy

At first you were just like “this is admiration”

“He very handsome i just admire his features”

Yeah

And maybe it was..

At first

Now it's a full blown crush

Like

For real

That boy is so hard working

Like you constantly see him asking for help

So he can improve

And like

People always said he was a visual only

Which made you feel bad that you saw that at first 

But you realized later

That like

You actually like him bc of his personality

What a hard worker 

For real

Angel

Anyways

Little did you know that your crush was NOT one sided

Hyunjin admired your hard work in producing

And how you always took criticism well and only worked to improve your work

Also

He thought you were hella cute

So yall were both kinda obvious

Him more than you

Like by a loT

So skz knew for a fact that hyunjin was head over heels in love w you so they pushed him to confess to you

Yeah he was like no

But after PEEr pRessUre

He finally agreed

They was gonna plan something like a party for you

To celebrate the time you’ve been w the company

But the showcase came before the celebration and suddenly they were on a survival show to see who would debut

So the party was postponed OOOODDDDD

But you didnt even know it was gonna happen so you didnt mind anyways

Soon enough it got closer to your birthday, and skz just decided to make it a birthday celebration instead

Hyunjin was more iffy about confessing bc what if you dont feel the same and he ruins your bday oh no

But at this point, skz was sure you liked him back so they were like dont worry about that they aren’t like that your relationship will be fine

So the party happens ladida

You were super surprised and sosososososo happy

Bc like

Your hart

These boys were precious and totally made your day

Tbh bc of your work

You almost forgot it was your birthday

After the crazy loud party, you wanted to like take some quiet time for yourself so you excused yourself

And then walked to the hallway and sat by the window and looked out at the city and the night sky

Beautiful

And suddenly you heard footsteps

It was this boy named jason who you were friends with

He was from the same town you were from so you got close p quickly when you first got to jyp

And jason had a not-so-secret crush on you

That ofc you were oblivious to

But he came over there to spend time w you and wish you happy bday

Little did you know

Hyunijn was mentally preparing himself to confess to you down the hall and around the corner w a pretty bouquet of flowers what a sweet boy

And when he finally works up the courage, he turns the corner and sees jason giving you a bday hug 

And he cant help but feel his hart drop

Yall look good together and like you were from the same town so similarities

So he was heartbroken needless to say

 He quickly turned around and walked away

But you heard the footsteps and saw just a glance of his outfit retreating

You excused yourself from jason’s company and ran after him bc you are so in love w this boy

You were gonna hug him and thank him, but when you approached he took a step back

Like ow

That hurt

He quickly stammered that he had to go home bc he was tired and left

He was hiding the flowers behind his back :’(

And then tossed them as soon as he left the building

He went for a long ass walk to clear his mind and soothe his aching heart

You were so worried

Was he okay?

You went home soon after bc you couldnt help but worry and that made you super tired

But you couldn't sleep

InsOMniA

Goddamn it hyunjin

You messaged him

“you’re prob sleeping but i hope you feel better”

Dry ass reply: “thx”

Like wow

Rude

But you let it go

jic he was actually really exhausted

You knew he took criticism from the show too so maybe it was that

Hopefully he’d talk to you about it bc he usually did

But he didn't

He avoided you

Your heart really couldnt take it

Meanwhile you and jason got closer bc you didnt have hyunjin to hang out w anymore

Despite your many efforts

And this just further fuels his belief that yall are together

So to ignore the tinge in his heart every time he saw you, he buried himself in practice

Didn't sleep

Didnt drink enough water

Didnt eat enough

He was getting dangerously skinny and unhealthy

And it affected his attitude

Not only to you but to his members

One day you were asked to come in and monitor a recording session

And he was happy and giggly in front of the camera

But as soon as it turned off u could see the fatigue

And you told him that he should take better care of himself

And he SNAPPEd at you

 You actually flinched bc he was so aggressive

Your heart SHATTEREd

And you, also sleep deprived as FUCk

Slapped him

Not super hard, but like a “what the fuck is wrong with you”

And you walked right out, not even bothering to hide your tears

And he was sad but he thought that you hating him would help him get over you

What a dumb boy

You completely avoided him after that

You also still had restless nights 

God that convo kept playing over and over in your head

YOU COULDNT SLEEP

But one day you got a call from chan

He needed your help

Hyunjin was seriously overworking himself and he was afraid hyunjin was gonna collapse

Luckily you were still at the company working on smth bc ofc you couldn't sleep anyways so might as well make use of your time

So you finally agree bc even if you’re still angry at him, you are srsly worried about this boy

And when you get to the dance room your heart breaks all over again

Hes so pale

And sickly looking

And hes shaking but hes still dancing

You knock and hear a gruff “its open”

The music pauses for a moment but when he sees its you he scoffs and turns it back on

“what do you want”

“Uhm.. are you okay?”

“Why? You wanna slap me again to make me feel better?”

Ofc you rolled your eyes bc wtf hyunjin you were being nice

“I dont even know why i bothered”

You go over to the stereo and turn it off yourself

And he turns to you angry

ARGUMENT TIME

Him: “WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM?”

“MY PROBLEM?!!!?!?? YOU’RE THE ONE WHO PUSHED ME AWAY FOR NO DAMN REASON!! AND EVEN AFTER ALL THAT, I STILL TRIED TO BE NICE AND ASK IF YOU WERE OKAY. I WAITED FOR YOU TO OPEN UP TO ME. TO TALK TO ME ABOUT WHATEVER WAS BOTHERING YOU!”

At this point, you’re practically sobbing like udk if he can understand you but who cares

All this frustration that was pent up inside felt good being released

Bc at this point, you had nothing more to lose

Hyunjin already hated you so like why not just speak your mind amirite

 Anyways continuing w the dialogue:

“HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT MY PROBLEM WHEN MY PROBLEM IS YOU!”

Cue awkward pause/break thing (AWKwARD SiLEncE)

“What are you talking about hyunjin?”

He sighed defeatedly

It was now or never. He felt like his relationship w you was ruined already anyways

So he, like you, also had a ‘what do i have to lose’ mentality

“I was going to confess to you y/n. That night at your birthday party. But i was too late. I saw you with jason and you looked so happy and perfect together.  So i left. I cut my ties with you because i didn’t want my own feelings to get in the way of your happiness.”

You were completely utterly speechless

Like there were an overwhelming number of feelings enveloping you atm

Bc on the one hand:

The love of your life just confessed to you

But on the other

Like

What a dumbass

You end up laughing and scoffing at his words bc

Hes so dumb

You dont like jason

God you’ve been in love w hyunjin for so goddamn long

And now you’re debating over how to respond

But like your anger and frustration kinda takes precedence bc youre also sleep deprived and you go

“ so, you broke your own heart and then you broke mine because you didn’t want to talk to me about it you dumbass ????”

And he gives you that classic confused puppy-dog look

W the head tilt and everything

And you go

“Hwang hyunjin, i’m fucking in love with you”

And he just stares blankly at you and blinks like 8 times trying to comprehend what just came out of your mouth

And his lips form an ‘o’ shape

And then hes coming closer and wrapping his arms around you

And you dont even mind that hes still sweaty and kinda smelly

Bc hes finally in your arms

But holding him so close also makes you super aware of just how skinny he’s gotten

Like it was worse than you thought

So you pull back and you open your mouth to chastise him

But before you can even start he’s cupping your cheeks can pulling your face to his

Your lips collide and then they're molding into one another

And your mind kinda blanks out

But your automatic reaction seems to be letting your fingers run through his hair and pulling him closer towards you

And when yall finally come up for breath

He tries to go in for another one like immediately after

Like slow your roll boy you guys can kiss all you want later

If you said that out loud, he wouldve responded w something like “we gotta make up for lost time”

But you put your hands on his chest and hold him back

And he pouts

(you almost squeal at how cute he looks)

“Ok, now that we’re dating, i am literally commanding you to take better care of yourself because this,” you eye him up and down, “is unacceptable”

And he quirks an eyebrow up and is like

Oh? I don’t recall asking you out? On a date?”

And you get all blushing and become a blubbering mess and hide your face in his chest like

“Shut up hyunjin”

But he’s just giggling at your embarrassed face :D

Then, him being the dramatic hoe that he is, he gets down on one knee in front of you and says

“y/n, y/l/n, will you go out on a date with me?”

And ofc u say yes

And after that whole dramatic scene, you pull him out of the practice room, fingers intertwined, ready to stuff him with food

And he goes

“I dont think i said it back.”

“Said what back?”

“That i love you”

UWU

And the rest is history

[wickymicky]

Kpop linguistics is literally the exact content I love to see around here as someone also finding herself at this weird interest intersection lol lowkey this kind of stuff is one of the reasons you're one of my favourite blogs around here

WOAH!!!!! aAAAAAA! thank you!!

im gonna put a Read More here bc it got too long and rambly

i cant help it lmao, i’m a linguist and i went to college for linguistics. that’s just how my brain works, it’s like an adhd hyperfocus special interest type thing, idrk what to call it, but i’ve been learning everything i can about language (in particular phonology and morphology) for like a decade. i dont talk about it much but i spend a huuuuuuge amount of time working on and thinking about my conlang (constructed language) that i’ve had since high school. it’s not very good, but it’s sort of a sandbox where i can fool around with linguistics stuff lol. i wanted to write a paper about the use of conlangs as tools for linguists to use for better understanding certain concepts that they have trouble with, but im not in college at the moment and idk if i will be again anytime soon... anyway yeah like this is my shit lol.

oh and like thats whats super cool about getting into kpop! its a whole lot of media in a language i didnt have much exposure to beforehand. i took latin in high school and ancient greek in college, and then i did like hungarian and vietnamese duolingo for a while lol, but there’s not a ton of easily accessible media in those languages, and certainly not much with subtitles, and definitely not anything for latin and ancient greek haha. like i wish there was something like anime for every language, just a huge wealth of shows in various animated styles in a language i dont speak, but with subtitles so i can recognize that when they say a certain word multiple times and i pick up on it, and every time they do the word “dream” is in the subtitles, i can piece together that that word probably means dream. 

so like i have a suuuuper poor understanding of japanese grammar and shit, but i think fairly good pronunciation and a long list of vocab words ive picked up on because thats what my brain gravitates towards. like when i’d hear something i thought was interesting, i’d spend hours looking it up too. like how high vowels (“i” and “u”) often become voiceless between two voiceless consonants in japanese, which is why “sasuke” is pronounced seemingly like “saske”. but if it was an o instead of a u, it’d probably be sasoke not saske, cause its only the high vowels that drop out. also things like... why do certain words that start with a voiceless consonant become voiced in some compound words, but not others? “kana” becomes “gana” in hiragana, but stays “kana” in katakana. why? well, apparently that’s a thing and there’s a name for that. i forget it at the moment lmao, but i know that it happens. and so how come h- becomes b- in that situation? well it’s because it was originally p-, and then it weakened to a sort of f-like sound, and then further into h-, except for “pu” which stayed on the middle stage as “fu” even in modern japanese. all instances of “p” in modern japanese are either because the p was doubled (geminated), or they’re loanwords. so like yeah haha, it’s not that i “picked up japanese from watching anime”, it’s that watching anime and hearing certain things made me curious and i spent a lot of time looking into that. not learning the language tho lol... i like learning ABOUT the language, but im not very good at actually learning the language.

and thats what ive been doing with korean too! it’s not a language i had much experience with, so at first i couldnt make out any words at all in kpop songs. it was hard to tell where one word ended and where the next began. and that was only like two or three months ago lol... i’m still really new. i started noticing certain words that came up a lot. “piryohae”, “saranghae”, “bogosipeo”, “nareul”, “eolgul”, “joahae”, “jigeum”, “shigan”, “sungan”, “eopseo”, “bimil”, “maeum”, god the list goes on and on. it’s just vocab, but for the most part i learned to recognize those words before i knew what they meant lol, cause i dont look at lyrics much. so i’d look them up and go “ohhhhhhh yeah okay i can see why that word would be in those places in those songs” or whatever. and like, you know, learning more about hangeul teaches me more about the phonology of the language (which is my SHIT). and like i could try to write about how the unaspirated and aspirated initial consonants are often pronounced the same by the younger generation of speakers, but the unaspirated one adds something of a low tone to the following vowel, or i could try to write about how the double-consonants (jj, pp, tt, kk, ss) came often from initial sequences of sp- st- sk- etc, or how an ongoing sound change that you’ve probably noticed is that initial m- and n- are being pronounced closer to b- and d-, and how ae and e have completely merged, and how long vowels arent pronounced by younger speakers anymore, etc lol. i could write about how korean used to have a strong system of vowel harmony but centuries of sound change and loanwords from chinese that broke the vowel harmony rules have eroded it significantly, but it still plays a role in a handful of grammatical conjugations. i’ve been like cracking out, for lack of a better term, on learning about the history of the language and the inner workings of it, and ive spent some time attempting to learn the language too, though not that much lol. my brain is much better at collecting facts and having a deep understanding how Language works than it is at understanding how to speak a particular language lol. i cant really speak a word of arabic but i know all about triconsonantal roots and emphatic consonants and 3-vowel systems and differences between the various dialects of arabic lol

blah anyway lol

[stuclyblrs]

hi, would you have any tips on getting started with chinese? i would love to have a tutor and i think that would be the best way of learning but im completely broke, so which other ways would be good? i know its super difficult and im a complete beginner so i have no idea about pronunciation or symbols or anything so i need a good place to start. Thanks!

你好! so sorry about the late reply!! i started studying chinese with classes at uni so im not 100% the best person to ask about self-studying but i’ll do my best !!!

first learn pinyin and tones

pinyin actually isnt as hard as it seems tbh tones on the other hand are something i struggle a lot with even after a semester of college level chinese so dedicate a lot of time to this !! i recommend this playlist by yoyo chinese/yangyang chen. the first several videos cover tones which is followed by pinyin itself. i also recommend this video by her as more pinyin review (its very lengthy so i recommend watching it in chunks) and this video by her for tone practice. she also has a pinyin chart which is soooooo helpful! it has audio recordings of each syllable w/ the 4 tones + quick videos for the harder syllables (strongly recommend her youtube channel in general)

writing/learning characters

this basically comes down to practice practice practice !!! when ever you learn a new character look up the stroke order and only write it that way. it will make your characters look nicer and if you write the same way every time you’ll build muscle memory making it much easier to remember (writing characters that you’ve studied will come naturally this way) i use this website to look up stroke order for each character (you can look up the rules for stroke order but tbh i dont understand them so i just look up for each character). i suggest learning the 40 most common radicals first. understanding these will make learning meanings of new characters easier.

in terms of actually practicing i strongly do not recommend flashcards. i think flashcards are great for vocab in any other language but not chinese. they’ll help you recognize characters and associate them with meaning and pronunciation but when you go to write you’ll blank out (if you only look at the pinyin/meaning side and write the characters i think they’re okay but its kind of a lot of work) when i learn new words, i would write out about two lines worth of the character over and over again (i usually used printer paper rather than lined cause some characters are big and its kind of a squeeze - many people use hanzi grids to write). once i did that for every character in the lesson, i would write out the dialogue once or twice. after this i would look at the pinyin for the dialogue (covering the characters) and write it out again a few times until i made sure that i remembered every character. i like doing this because it ensure that i actually know the character and then im learning it in context rather than just knowing meaning. i also then look at the dialogue and write the whole thing in pinyin (covering the pinyin and looking at the characters) just to make sure i remember that too!

textbooks

for self studying i think getting a textbook and following it is one of the best ways to learn. it will have vocab and grammar that goes with it and will allow you to stick to a more precise learning schedule rather than getting lost on what you should study and what order to learn things. there are a lot of different books so i would look at ones that interest you and read reviews/watch video reviews on youtube to determine which is the best to use

the only textbook ive used is integrated chinese since thats what we used in class and i believe its a very popular one to use but i havent used anything else so i dont have anything to compare it to. there is a pdf of the third version here (dont think there are major differences between the third and fourth tho) i have seen people say that its not super good w/out a teacher but idk :// i feel like how my professor taught class wasnt completely based on the book - more her taking the vocab/grammar in each lesson and then making her own explanations/lessons based on that

other textbooks that i have pdfs on (have never used so cant give opinion on)

modern mandarin chinese grammar and a workbook (original post)

folder with a lot of stuff (original post)

another folder with a lot of books (original post)

helpful apps

pleco - dictionary app that includes simplified and traditional, example sentences and audio recordings of the words

hellotalk - im using this for korean rn and have had a general positive experience with it ! you can talk to native speakers learning english w/ the chat function and post “moments” publicly for others to correct. its super easy to correct sentences w/in the app (some people have had issues w/ this app in terms of people only contacting them to try and date but i havent encountered that yet) i used the moments feature a lot to post scripts and other writings for class so someone can look over it before i handed it in :^)

chineseskill - i actually havent used this yet but pretty much every chinese langblr recommends it! chinese duolingo essentially

other

some various other things that might be helpful for studying !

if ur interested my general tag for chinese, vocab, and grammar

favorite blogs @liu-anhuaming and @langblog

making a langblr/studyblr !! its fun, theres lots of resources, vocab lists, other people learning on here and making ur own posts is helpful in seeing where you lack some understanding about certain topics and for learning new vocab 

listen to music and watch tv shows/movies! its good for listening practice and lets you learn more in context

reading practice site - has different levels, you can hover over words for instant translation, and there is an explanation of more complex grammar

masterposts that i like (x) (x)

i hope this is helpful and if you have any more questions please feel free to message me again. good luck with your studies 加油！

[minblush]

k-armys are spreading a tweet namjoon made in 2013 about korean independence where he says 'There is no future for people who have forgotten history' which shows he probably won't agree with working with a japanese imperialist, hopefully he still has this attitude in 2018 twitter(.)com/BTS_twt/status/367906282012831744

yeah i have seen them doing that ;; and fancafe and all the official tweets since then have been flooded with people talking about these things too, but bighit is playing dead fish so far :(

microwavehater said:Am i the only one who never believed that bts has ~creative freedom~ (anymore) ? If they (still) had, they’d use their influence to spread msgs like baepsae, not just love urself uwu (considering yoongi made political pre-debut releases &interview stuff) Also, their newer releases (LY her onwards) are v much lacking in the hiphop department which (i assume) was a marketing choice. Hiphop just doesn’t sell as well to a female audience (along w the fact that vocalists are the face of BTS).

i think they still have creative input but creative freedom definitely not, but it’s debatable if they ever had it anyway? idk.. and them moving on from hip-hop was definitely both trying to change things up as well as appeal to a broader audience, love yourself era overall was an attempt to basically touch as many people as possible, i don’t mind them changing their musical direction but what has bothered me was the loss of their involvement (because it is less)

Anonymous said:I totally agree with you about BTS losing their originality. I’m almost starting to get annoyed of them. Now bc they know people love their music for its topics such as mental health, etc I almost feel like they’re thinking that they’re obliged to constantly write music that only has a “social” message. I did not like Idol at all. It was pretty tacky and the idea of loving yourself seemed so forced in the lyrics. I want them to make songs about whatever they want at that moment. (1/?)

Anonymous said:Also every fan keeps saying the same thing about them being unfiltered when actually they’ve become SO filtered now. They’ve almost created this illusion of being super open with us when actually we barely know anything about them. I don’t mind that but I hate how they’re touting that as something that applies to them. Honestly most fans now are the bandwagon type and the fandom is starting to feel more like a cult versus a community like it used to. (2/2)

i don’t know if i ever talked about them losing their originality? because originality is debatable in this case too, if you mean their original intention then yes i agree with that, and i agree they definitely created the illusion, once i got out of the bts bubble a bit and also thought back to the old days, i realized how closed off and filtered everything is comparison to the past and even to other kpop groups nowadays that are way more direct, i feel like even exo is more outspoken these days and direct with their fans which i thought could never happen??? i used to stan them and it was hell hah.. and these days.. wowza..

Anonymous said:Fuck yesss we need new yoongi mixtape and i agree abt what you said i wish bts could read that and be like okay guys i think they are right we have done some questionable things and shit has to be addressed whether we like it or not and just fucking do so. Some fans will drop but some would drop anyway bc it is getting out of hand i would never want to call bts problematic bc shit i cannot imagine that being true but them supporting problematic people is kind of making them ones

i just feel like nothing will change because bang pd is too greedy.. he really is eyeing like building a global empire with all the business deals he has been making.. also bts have done plenty “problematic” things themselves, though not to that extent, but some of their actions have hurt a lot of people too, but it depends on what bothers you, i find colorism and things like that a problem, but ofc definitely different thing than pedophilia and such, i just meant to say that nobody is perfect

Anonymous said:Do you ever just wanna randomly bump into bts and be like “hey lets talk!” And then tell them about all these issues and fandom drama and just tell them to wake the hell up? Cos I do haha

well even if we bumped into them, most of them wouldn’t talk to you so dkajsdka

Anonymous said:i agree with everything you have said but what bothers me is he is a co produce of produce 48 and nobody really complained about it even though he is know for sexualizing minors... or did i miss something?? also i feel sorry for you getting hate you were just saying your opinion and people should start to accept some facts! it's not the first time bighit did something questionable ://

oh but actually when that was announced there was backlash? i remember seeing complaints about the producer as well as some of the trainees due to their supposed right wing associations, there were also complaints about women’s rights cause of the oversexualization of some of the girls back in japan and the producer’s lyrics, i think this backlash seems bigger or more visible to you because it’s happening in your fandom ;; that season of produce even ended up having the lowest rankings and voting participation so :/

Anonymous said:I have three words to describe the part of the fandom that blindly accepts all the things, even the problematic ones, BTS do. 'Situationally woke cult'.

that fits perfectly

Anonymous said:i rly appreciate sou voicing your thoughts even if they r not in essay form or refined for days. I agree with you on many things but at the same time it's not as disappointing to me bc I guess I never held them to high standards. like in the beginning I could kinda imagine that they were somewhat sincere (but still remained sceptical) but the more they got famous the more I accepted that that sincerity and authenticity would stop bc that's just the kind of business that kpop is... (♤)

Anonymous said:like it's an inherently dishonest industry. they sell an image just like everyone else, and at best(!!) they were as real as possible with us in the beginning. no doubt they wanted to be different from everyone else and it was easier as long as not that many people gave a fuck about them. but as soon as they started to this chance was over. so i guess what I'm saying is that my view didn't change and I'm not surprised, because I never really bought what they were trying to sell...(♤)

Anonymous said:I still love them, theyre likeable & adorable boys. but theyre not changing the world. they're not in the right kind of industry for that. they love their luxury expensive stuff & the glamour of it all & that's okay. I just take every concept the whip out w/ a grain of salt & a knowing smile & enjoy the entertainment. that's just my own two cents that nobody in the fandom wants to hear so I'm bothering u. & its not an analysis or anything just what is on top of my mind while watching TV lol (♤)

Anonymous said:(♤) oh ps. except for that whole controversial stuff with that misogynist jpn songwriter and supreme boy and what not. I take that seriously , I wont act as if that's just a cute quirk. but they're men so I didn't expect much lmaoo. I knew that those kind of disappointments are just part of the deal ever since I learned that jimin (a whole cutie pie and my ultimate bias) stans chris brown. definitely would kick jm in the shin for that if I ever got to meet him. at least keep it to yourself lol.

haha i wish you didn’t start this with a backhanded compliment but dkajsd yeah overall i see your point and agree... i understand like if you didn’t buy into that whole spiel, then of course you can just keep on going and stanning them as idols and all that comes with that, but many people and me included sincerely thought that they were different, i have stopped stanning kpop groups for a while and got drawn back in with bts because i felt they were so fresh and unique, genuine and open with fans in comparison to other groups i have stanned.. but ofc that image crumbled as time went on.. things have changed as well... and i agree, it’s fine to enjoy it for just the entertainment and like the boys as people, accepting they are just as any other idol.. and maybe i will continue with that perspective myself!! but i honestly find it difficult having believed in it and also bighit continually selling this image to their fans despite evidence of the contrary, i can deal with idol business but like continually being blatantly lied to and then being in a fandom where most of the rhetoric is build around blindly believing it and eating anything the boys and bighit sells? it’s honestly emotionally exhausting sometimes.. but yeah.. you’re honestly right.. even with the last point lol... they are men, and korean men at that sigh.. that’s why i’m burying myself in girl groups nowadays adkjsd to heal my soul

Anonymous said:Hope you have a wonderful day filled with only good things ❤ - the cutest person in the world

thank you so so so so much! you have a wonderful day too ♥ cutie

Anonymous said:simple question, not loaded at all, no wrong answer, the honest answer is the right answer- yaddah yaddah you get it -what do you think bangtan is lying about and what exactly are you saying overall? i just need the language simplified for my 3 braincells :) if i do get what you're saying - whether the actual members of bts are real or not, their message is. "dont let anyone tell you what to do" "live your own life and not a borrowed dream" "life is a marathon, not a race - go your own pace"etc

you can read this post as well as the tags to it to see some of the examples, i mean i have been saying lots of things so i don’t know what exactly you want me to clarify? i think their message is compromised when their actions contradict it, whether it’s their actions or bighit’s is up to debate, like i was talking about in the post though, you can’t have things both ways, can’t hail the boys as woke independent kings while propagating the idea that they are just the company’s pawns at the same time, if you accept their authenticity isn’t there then ofc it’s a different argument, and the things you have listed there may be true, but isn’t is soured knowing they are just things that are said in order to sell bangtan as a product to you? to me they are

Anonymous said:I'm not gonna disagree but I like to see all the sides of a story. Bang pd is their boss, bts made a contract with him, he will ALWAYS have the last word on, well, everything they put out. We like to think that bc bts has creative freedom they can do whatever they want, well obviously they can't. Even if bts wanted to talk more about issues and not work w bad ppl, bang pd wants them to succeed, he wants to make money bc it's his business and bts is the only thing bringing money to it.

i get this argument a lot and to that i will answer again this and this, i don’t understand what your point is exactly though, so you are saying bts are pawns that have to do as they ceo says, yes and? i am criticizing the decision he has made? i’m criticizing that what he cares about the most is money? that he will stop at nothing to widen his wealth and influence? i will not support bts cooperating with vile people just because it wasn’t -completely their decision-, i’m sorry i’m really struggling to see what your point is about the other side of the story, it’s a shitty situation and if they all go through with it, it be greatly disappointing

[diaryofanangryasianguy]

This mght sound weird, but I'm writing an essay on discrimination in the kpop industry for an assignment (I'm korean-american for the record) and got stuck on which word to use: racism or xenophobia. I always considered all asians to be the same race - asian. We just have different sub-labels within that category (east asian, south asian, etc) because we have cultural differences. So any discriminaton a non-korean faces in korea would be xenophobia right? Except when those celebrities talk (1/2)

(2/2) about it, they always use the word racism*. Is it appropriate for me to use “xenophobia” when the victims have described it as “racism”? Is it really racism if the victim is southeast asian and the perpetrators are east asian? What about when both are east asian? since 90% of the victims are chinese. I dont want to discredit anyone’s experiences, but racism is discrimination by people of another race and I was under the assumption our race was asian. *could be a translation error but idk.

There’s no real word for discrimination against different ethnic/cultural groups of the same race (at least not that I know of) so it’s more like intraracial racism where people are of the same race but are “racist” to each other. But with the example you’re describing can also blend in with some form of xenophobia but not 100% exactly since it seems like some groups are more discriminatory towards other groups because they’re different and not because they’re from another country.

So it’s sort of a blend between an ethnic/cultural form of racism and xenophobia but neither one exactly. It would be xenophobia if someone is discriminatory towards someone primarily because of their country of origin. Though xenophobia and racism are two different things, they can cross and blend together very well—almost to the point where we can’t 100% differentiate. Example: if someone hates Americans, that would be xenophobia but if someone hates Asian Americans, that would be racism.

Update: another anon has responded and can be found here.

Angry Asian Guy

[byeoltan]

Hi!! Let me say at first how much I appreciate you, your blog is my favourite one!! Thank you for keeping it interesting and diverse! I have a question. Do you by any chance understand what bts comeback concept has to do with words 'love yourself'?? I got that album is about falling in love, being special for someone and unique moments in one's life etc. But i still can't get why they imply that the concept is about loving one's self if this issue barely was touched upon? Am i missing on smth?

but it was written in every breath they took in producing the album bby TT 

their comeback stage showed it all, they could’ve started with intro: serendipity, but no, they straight up went with ‘i need u’ the song that took them to where they are now. they mentioned how everyone cried so much when they had their very first win with i need u, especially jimin. it was in i need u that they realized they might just.. have made it, a step further. if you’ve been with them for a while, you’d know how dirty bangtan and army were treated, like really we were dissed left and right it was really a tough situation especially for k-armys they can’t even be proud of our boys or even mention their names in articles without getting ridiculed just cos they’re not ‘big’ TT and even when we had our first win, bangtan still get called out for ridiculous reasons that’s just. the fact that they made their comeback with i need u shows just how much they treasure the moment the fans that made it possible at that time, i need u was the breakthrough, i need u made them realize that they can actually be… happy now, and move forward. and maybe love themselves more, and performing mic drop afterwards shows exactly that :)

honestly love yourself album is in every sense, calls you to love yourself, if not, more, even when you don’t think you can, just look at the lyrics

just let me love yousince the time the universe was first formedeverything has been decidedjust let me love you–intro: serendipity

and when they say

don’t worry, lovebecause all of this is isn’t a coincidence(even when) we are totally different, babybecause (of that still) destiny is found in the two of ussince the day the universe came into existence, it has continuously been soand transcending for infinite centuries, it will continuously be sofrom our past lives too, perhaps, and even the next lives to comebecause we will still be together forever (no matter)–DNA

doesn’t that encourage you to embrace yourself, despite our differences? and

when you say that you love mefeels like i’m treading on the sky/heavenstell me about forever just one more timewhen you say that you love mei, i’ll be fine even if just those wordsthat you would never change, just one more time–best of me

bangtan treasures us so much as they treasure themselves that they wish for our love to never change no matter how bad things might get 

i wonder if it’s a mistake an angel left behindif not that then, a deep kiss?that dimple is illegalbut I want it anyway anyway anyway–보조개 (dimple)

did you know? that dimples are a medical flaw, a genetic defect that is caused by shortened facial muscles, which is why when we smile, the shorten muscle pulls the skin on our face causing a dimple. but somehow in our society, dimples are embraced and carries a mark of beauty and loveliness the contradiction is fascinating how human perception can override facts, and i personally think this is what makes the song more meaningful despite the casual pop tune, because what ever flaw you think you have, might not be a flaw at all. you can chose to hide it by not smiling, but isn’t it lovely when you smile? love yourself.

stopnow stop watching (and) start studying for (your) examsyour parents and your manager/boss they dislike meall those video clips you’ve watched, twitter photos,v app, bon voyage i know they’re so good, what should we dostop. the music video, (i’m saying) interpret (it) lateraren’t there plenty of my photos in your room, anywaywhat is an hour even? a year passes by just like thatthis song is a reward i’m giving (it) to you.good girl/good boy–pied piper

btw 착해 is an expression, a good compliment you usually receive from an elderly person/grown up when if you do well in something, its not sexual guys idk why some ppl imply it is lmao

so when bangtan says this they mean it wholeheartedly like a friend, like an older brother because they know how bad we have it for them, they know how much influence they have on us, as much as we ahve on them. despite scolding us, albeit, in a loving manner, they really want the best for us. unlike the original story where the pied piper drove the children away from the town of hamelin when the town ppl refuse to pay for his service in luring the plague causing rats away, bangtna isn’t set to lure us away, they in fact, want us to go to them, be with them, love with them, but in addition, we have to set our priorities in real life straight, so that, everyone can appreciate our love too, and maybe, the society won’t put much hate on us anymore.

please army remember what we say, love myself, love yourself, i really love you, and thank you

–skit: billboard music awards speech

this says everything hnnggghh

yeah? who said my ‘spoon was dirty’i don’t care, when i grab the mic i own those whole lot of ‘gold spoons’all of a sudden, those that didn’t cook well are in rage, those lot of steaks i’ll chew on y’all over and over again, on the star’s dinner table–mic drop

oh man i need another post dedicated to mic drop there’s so many things to talk about in this 

the thing i earn with hard work, my paygonna spend it all on my tummy all the pennies i collect/count just to waste it all (on my tummy)leave me be, even if i overspendor come tomorrow morning and like a crazy guymy savings, if i cash them all out (leave me be)woo there’s no tomorrowmy future’s been seized for collateral  woo my money’s all further spent friends, wassup?do you want some?–고민보다 Go (rather than worrying, go)

this whole song is satirical critique tbh even the dance choreography pls appreciate them

and then the outro, which reiterates everything about love and sacrifice, about being the best of yourself, about loving yourself first and foremost

the world is a complexwe was lookin’ for lovei am too, just one of those pplhonestly even i didn’t believe in real lovelike a habit i said i want to love, just babbling like thatbut i found myselfthe whole new myselfeven if i’m confused, which am i is the real meme meeting you makes me wonder, aren’t i a book?or is it you, who are the turning pages (of my book)?damn–outro: her

PLEASE LISTEN TO THIS SKIT THERES ENG SUB AND CRY WITH ME HOW ARE THEY SO PUREE THEY WERE REMEMBERING OLD DAYS AND HOW THEY DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT BILLBOARD IS NAD JIMIN HE JIMIN THOUGHT GRAMMY WAS A PERSON’S NAME AJSHD

theres a reason why bangtan made the skit and sea as hidden tracks, you have to undertsand that bangtan has come a longg way. and one of the reasons why they were finally able to get their first win the last time was through purchase of physical copies, which helped tremendously raise the sales. bangtan may be celebrated and loved wordlwide but back in their home ground, they were nobodies, which is why buying physical copy always meant more even (especially for k-fandoms) since you’re willing to go for an extra mile, its part of kfandom culture for fans to invest a lot of time and money for their group supports and projects to help get their fave name out there, sure you can like/listen to other groups but ultimately, hundreds of idols debut eveyr year so in order to make sure your group lasts a long time, korean fans consider it very important to pledge their loyalty to a single group and support them with all you have, this is why it was even harder for karmys because we come from small company :’)

and now that they are getting success tremendously over the past year (BANGTAN’S #7 ON BILLBOARD 200 GUYS PLEASE GIVE YOURSELFVES A PAT WE DID THAT), love yourself is to be quite honest, an album dedicated to armys all round, and those two tracks are just a little bit more intimate, and more on a personal level, which is why it was hidden from the rest of the world, i’d like to think that the reason they kept it hidden in a physical copy because they know for certain that only their fans would purchase a physical copy, and that they want us to be the first ppl to hear it, to listen to their laments, their grieves, their happiness, their love, they just wanna them share with us first and foremost, because they know only we would get it, because we’ve been there

in the end the mirage is caught andit becomes reality, andthe desert i was once afraidbecame the sea with our blood, sweat, and tearsbut then amongst all this happiness,what are these fears?because this place is originally a desert, we know this too well–sea

[sanhatation]

ri’s thicc 2017 reflection post !

its still quite a few hours away from 2018 for me but i just wanted to take this time to reflect on my absolutely Lovely 2017!!! yay time 2 get sappy as i word vomit and overshare about my year on tumblr.com !!!!

thank you loads to all of my LOVELY followers !!!!!!!!! yall are the cutest, make my day on the daily ! i wish you the best 2018 that the world can offer !!! stay healthy, take time for yourself, love yourself, love others, and be kind! 💓💓

this Riley Rant here, is gonna be here for me than anything. like a Fat journal entry !! and i am an Oversharer so here she goes [jeopardy music]

to begin, i have met and befriended so many amazing people on here this year and WOW!!!!!! lovely and supportive and talented, beautiful aroha friends??? it doesnt get better than that!!!!! i would attempt to tag all of u but yall know who u are ;)) im endlessly grateful to those of you who have really made being on here worth it. heck ya sometimes im like “why do i even spend time on here” but then!!!! idk sunny comes swingin in with just a heart full of love or sara comes swingin in with her eggs or marian comes swingin in with her rare pairs or j comes swingin in with her baking posts and thats not even HALF of it !!!!! seriously.....love you guys tons.

to my friends who i have had the pleasure of remaining your friend this year and getting closer to u !! i love you. i really dont know how yall handle me especially 2015/2016 me?? a MESS! yall are the REALEST. again, yall know who u are ;)) i hope we can continue to talk and have fun in 2018, i wish yall the best. 

and lastly....heres a THICC shoutout to my six shining stars. 

as for me as an individual, 2017 was a freaking Whack year. it was incredible....dare i say, iconic. and now its time for.....RILEY’S 2017 HIGHLIGHTS !!!!!! (also includes: the sucky parts bc even those allowed me to grow !)

- man, did 2017 start out pretty rough when my country decided it was a good idea to elect a freakin cheeto for president. however! i had the lovely opportunity to attend the women’s march at my capital the day before inauguration !! and it was powerful!!!! truly an experience ill treasure forever!

- binch....thank u Winter Dream for my whole life. tbh i wont forget sobbing at my best friend’s house when it dropped. thank u Miss Again Dance Practice. thank u Miss You & Me MV. thank u Miss Cotton Candy Choreography. thank u. 

- ah.....when some pinhead started that tr*mp chanting at a basketball game lol! so iconic that we made the new york times! gotta love that....

- OMG !!! HOW TO SUCCEED !!!! an absolutely amazing experience. granted, the male lead was a Snake, but i had a blast. Rosemary will forever be close to my heart and ill always cry a little when i hear Brotherhood of Man or Paris Original !! such an awesome opportunity. i learned a frick ton about myself as a performer. i improved a ton in acting and dancing, and also came to learn that i am very good at receiving instructions and memorizing lines quickly. i learned that i need to work on some of my facial expressions and i also learned some of my habits ! i miss u Queenie H2$ :’’)

- had my first tap dance performance ever??? i really enjoyed learning tap, and i hope to pick it back up in the future !!!!

- BIIIIIINCCH i had the opportunity to visit my sister in korea!!!!!!! wow.....truly the BEST week of my entire year, maybe even LIFE! i went to the dog cafe, the sheep cafe, mcountdown, the lunar festival kick off, gwanghwamun palace, dongdaemun, shopped a ton around hongdae, ate food by the han river, visited namsan tower (but not without getting lost), hit the noraebang TWICE, walked into a private Fantagio board meeting, ate delicious chicken on a STIIICK, ran in the rain, ordered delivery mcdonalds, had the BEST fried chicken, met a bunch of monks, was led around dongdaemun by a very old korean man, SAW EUNWOO AND DOYEON AND RECEIVED MUCH LOVE AND NEARLY DIED, hit the convenience store literally every day, snuck out, GOT A WAVE FROM KEY :((( , bought Winter Dream and lots of skin care products and lots of cute clothes, had the clearest skin ive ever had in my life, went to a buddhist temple, witnessed a drunk man fall into the splits inbetween the ground and the subway, ran up and down 1000 subway stairs, fell in love with a man named Peanut, drank too much banana and strawberry milk, sobbed my face off at the festival as korean grandmas bowed to me, tried tons of new foods (including the nastiest bowl of cheese ramyun ive ever had in my life), bought lots of socks, rode an airplane for......like 40 hours in total? literally the best week of my Life

- had my junior vocal recital ! it was a cute girl. i felt my acting had really improved since sophomore voice recital !! 

- had prom on my 17th birthday and had a jolly good time !!! my mom made my dress and i felt like a Stunner

- dream pt. 01...she rly is that Bad Bih. best era. miss her loads. none of us ever deserved her. 

- les mis !!!!!! two whole weeks.....another Best Time. i learned so much, made so many lifetime friends, had a blast, sang my heart out.....such a freaking good time. i miss her

- got to spend the ENTIRE summer with momo!!!!!!!!!!! literally the ENTIRE!!!!! and what did we do? hit the park, watched lemonade mouth and fantastic beasts and starstruck and that random unicorn movie, made the Best slime, made that ICONIC weki meki video, laughed a ton, cried a ton, stayed up all night for the sunrise, stayed later for the sunset & thunderstorm, walked home in the pouring rain & lightning (IT IS VERY WET), went to the beach, met many dogs, got me hairs cut, befriended that Cat, and went to a painting class

- cabin week !!!!!!!!!!! whatta lovely time

- my brother’s wedding !!!! honestly? my best outfit of the year... had a bangin time. his wife is truly a cutie and i love her tons!

- there was that Mess in august and i still feel sorry to those who felt hurt because of it. i learned a lot about how things especially on the internet can be easily misunderstood and misinterpreted, so u gotta be EXTRA careful with your words ! 

- through that i also came to accept that u cant get everyone to understand or like u, and tbh that is okay for now. all we can do when we make mistakes is try to understand & learn, apologize, and try to better ourselves. and sometimes even when u do that, u still may not be liked. and thats okay. as long as you are trying your best and recognize mistakes, its all good. 

-skinny dipped at girls time wow what a freaking TIME

- woah dude i dropped out of my arts school lmao!!! the BIGGEST change in my life since 2014.;..wow! i dont even have the words to say how much stress was lifted off of me and i love senior yr !!!!

- momo came to CT!!!!!! 

- seeing svt live !!!!! but tbh the best part was seeing momo, “I LOVE A MAN WHO CAN SEW”, “I!!!!!!!!!! LOVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! JIHOON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”, “IM UNDERAGE”, and when Mo BLASTED to that other line

- LAKE COMPOUNCE LMAOOOOO I LOVE JIHOON PT2!!!!

- my mom, sister, and i took an eight week painting class! i finished two paintings and learned a ton!! honestly a good time

- dream pt. 02.....shes that other Bad Bih....absolutely adore her

- i also learned that its okay to cut people off who are toxic. especially if you have already informed them that they make u feel bad, they are not worth trying to please or keep around. take care of yourself. similarly, its okay to block people, and you dont owe them an explanation

- MADI CAME HOME !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! my other half...missed her so much :(((

- riley’s calligraphy christmas !!!!! was so much fun and i loved people’s reactions and i loved learning arohas favorite astro lyrics !!!

- ah...............one of the hardest weeks of my whole life. the pain still lingers, and i know itll hit me again like a boulder the next time we see only four of my angels standing on stage. for four months, i was worried sick about another member, and i even knew he was hurting, that his mental illness was real. my heart aches and there is a piece of it missing, but it will never be replaced. i know you are much happier now, jjong. i love you. 

- and also because of that, i have been able to think a lot about how i live my life. thoughts like ‘am i watching out for my family and friends enough?’ ‘am i listening enough?’ ‘is this funny comment worth it?’ ‘am i happy?’ im trying to be better. to not take things for granted, to only be kind, to always be there for those i love, for those who love me. and i will try my hardest to not complain about small or petty inconveniences. to try harder to be optimistic. 

- christmas was with my whole family for the first time in five years ;;; she was such a cute girl!

and now on to the next act !!!! its called RILEY’S NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS !!!!!!!!!! 

1. lets start with the basic stuff that im 99% not gonna pull through on: keep ur room clean. keep everywhere u go clean, it makes mom upset. eat better, u know there is other foods in this house besides peanut butter and pepperoni and popcorn. 

2. send out at least one Lovely Ask per day. i made this goal sometime over the summer, and i did it for a few months until i started to forget ;; its not that hard, u just gotta remember to do it !! 

3. sis.....quit Procrastinating.......GET ur FREAKING application done...do ur homework the night before lmao! call who u need to !!! write those thank u cards!!!! go get them scholarships!!!! enter that graphic design contest lmao!!! just DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!! time is wasting

4. just be happy 

[uiruu]

long post with phonology stuff dont read if you arent interested lol

hey so i have a conlang, and i wanna borrow loanwords from korean, but i’m having trouble deciding which vowel phonemes i should use to represent certain korean vowels. 

here is the korean vowel inventory: /i e̞ a o u ʌ̹ ɯ/ (with some speakers having a length distinction in initial syllables, and many if not most young speakers having no such distinction) (im not counting ø and y because theyve turned into we and ɥi for most modern speakers, and im not treating e and ɛ as distinct, cause again, they arent for most speakers)

here is my conlang’s vowel inventory: /i e a o u ə~ɘ/, as well as long versions of each. the long version of /ə~ɘ/ is /ɨ:/, though the rest of the long/short pairs have the same vowel quality. in the fictional history of my conlang, the original vowel was /ɨ/, and the short version has lowered to somewhere around /ə/ or /ɘ/. short /i/ and /u/ might also be lowering, but in the language’s fictional history, the lowering of /ɨ/ occurred first, and that’s the state that the language is in right now. 

so.... some of these are easy, right? /a/ for /a/, /e/ for /e/, /o/ for /o/, etc. the problem lies in the korean vowels /ʌ̹/ and /ɯ/. now, if i want to keep these vowels distinct from others as they are in korean, i could represent /ʌ̹/ with /ə~ɘ/, and /ɯ/ with /ɨ:/, since they have similar vowel qualities. but... the problem is... often my /ə~ɘ/ vowel is more like /ɘ/ and just sounds better that way to me, which is noticeably higher than /ʌ̹/, and doesnt feel like a perfect match. and i dont want to lower that vowel to a /ə/ in every situation just because i wanna capture the sounds of korean lol, just for a couple loanwords and proper names.... the other problem is that /ɨ:/ is inherently always long, and /ɯ/ isn’t. i’ve been toying with the idea of getting rid of phonemic vowel length and having long vowels have different vowel qualities from their short counterparts so they arent just merged, but historically long vowels would still affect the stress of a word in my language. so, a korean name like /t͡ɕinsʰoɭ/ would be /t͡sinsol/, and inflecting that name for the genitive case would result in /ˈt͡sinsolen/, but a name like /hasʰɯɭ/ would be /hasɨ:l/ and thus /haˈsɨ:len/, with the stress on the penultimate long vowel. that’s not a huge deal, but it just doesnt sound right to me, i dont like that lol.

another option is to just merge the two vowels into the short /ɘ/, which is fair, but.... sigh.... when it comes to things like this, i want to be as perfect as possible, and something about this solution just rubs me the wrong way. same with treating /ɯ/ as /ɘ/ and /ʌ̹/ as /o/, i don’t like that solution. this feels like something i should just get over though... it’s okay if i dont have a perfect one-to-one representation for all of another languages phonemes... sometimes i’m just gonna have to merge them. i hate doing it, but it works, and it’s not like it can’t lead to other interesting alterations and such... idk... 

i think i’m leaning towards treating them both as /ɘ/, unless an instance of /ɯ/ is word initial, in which case it could be /ɨ:/, but i’m not sure.

i’ve made other decisions to preserve the korean sound as much as possible already though, like for instance using /t͡s/ for /t͡ɕ/ even though i have /t͡ʃ/ in my language... partially because i’ve actually started to want to pronounce /t͡ʃ/ as /ʈ͡ʂ/, and palatalize /t͡si/ and possibly /ki/ into /t͡ɕi/ anyway, so using /t͡s/ to represent /t͡ɕ/ makes more sense to me than using /ʈ͡ʂ/. the problem is when it’s not korean /t͡ɕi/, but rather something like /t͡ɕu/.... do i go with /t͡su/ or /t͡sju/? on the one hand, /t͡sju/ could turn into /t͡ɕu/ if it palatalizes, but on the other hand, that’s not how languages ever borrow words haha, they borrow based on the sounds that are closest at the time of borrowing, and then sounds may change further afterwards, causing the original and borrowed versions of the word to deviate. i’m undecided on this, cause /t͡ɕ/ could be reasonably borrowed as /t͡s/, /t͡sj/, or /t͡ʃ~ʈ͡ʂ/ even without the idea that the language could have its own /t͡ɕ/ one day. 

i have merged things in some areas though, when it’s unavoidable. merging the two /e/s is fine, korean does that anyway most of the time. i’m not sure if i should treat the fortis consonants as geminates, but i cant have geminates word initially in my language anyway, and i dont distinguish between aspirated and unaspirated, so all three serieses of korean obstruents are merged word-initially. 가, 카, and 까 would all be /ka/ in my language. 아가, 아카, and 아까 might differ though, being /aga/, /aka/, and either /aka/ or /ak:a/. i’m not gonna create aspiration in my language or fortis stops just in order to romanize/conlang-ize korean words haha. this isn’t a conlang based on korean, i’m just trying to figure out how to do loanwords and proper nouns. 

any thoughts or opinions or feedback from phonology people who do conlangs and know about korean? phonology is my main area of interest in linguistics, and much of the reason i even have a conlang is for it to a playground for me to experiment with different ideas i have for sound changes and things like that. so yeah, i’m trying to figure out what i want to do about this instead of just going “eh, whatever”, because this is the interesting part to me haha.