#i feel guilty for not knowing for some reason which i know nobody wants

[milksjustice]

grahh!!!

[obsessiveloveistheonlylove]

Hey, I've read your last yandere Bruce, neglected fam reader and it gave me an idea. What if instead of the reader wasting all that money or luxury, she saved most of it in a closed account and when Bruce bought the apartment she made him sign it in her name as a plan to when the right time comes or if she needs to, she will sell the apartment and use all the money she saved to leave to start over in another country. Imagine Bruce finding out when she reaches the point where she put her apartment for sale, or better, actually selling it to a friend or someone they know and actually leaving.

Yan!batfam with neglected!sister reader leaving the state/country

Anon your mind is fucking golden! I also thought of the reader having the apartment signed in her name just because Bruce wanted her to feel comfortable but I love the layers this adds.

Hopefully these couple of hcs are good enough while I work on pt 2. Also if anyone else has any questions about any other scenarios or certain characters feel free to send them in I'll try to respond whenever I have time and I write for any gender reader.

Word count ; 1073

Unedited

___

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ bruce is not happy with this turn of events at all. He wasn't expecting nor did he sense that this was going to happen, you didn't post about it or even reference moving on any of your social media apps which he lovingly stalks watches over to make sure you are content with your life and also because he likes seeing you happy and enjoying all the things he got you. And it hurts him a little that you didn't even say something to him … he knows you don't owe him that, not when your relationship is still in a fragile state but he's trying.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ he only figures out after someone in the fam(most likely dick) broke in dropped by your apartment and likely scared one of your friends shitless.. obviously both parties are shocked but your friend more so as they don't know who the hell just broke into their house, dick is shocked when this random person claims that he's trespassing in their home. After that awkward situation dick immediately reports back to Bruce about this over the comms and with some digging from Tim they're able to find out that you had sold the house and the exact date that you had, approximately a month ago. That sends off alarm bells for the entire batfam, where are you now?! It takes an hour or so of searching to find out exactly where you moved and when they do they can't decide what to do with the information.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚Alfred is the voice of reason in this family, he discourages the batboys from immediately doing everything in their power to bring you home, he advocated for you to live wherever you choose and says that it's your life and that the family cannot choose for you. Alfred loves you dearly you are basically his child he views you the way he views Bruce. He may be a yandere but he's a selfless one he truly only has your best interest in mind. His words are like a slap of reality for some of the Batfam mainly Tim, Steph and Jason all three of then become a lot more hesitant to go through with their plans to bring you home on the other hand dick, bruce, and damian are adamant that you aren't safe unless they can be nearby.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ Nobody can come to a decision the night they find out and so they decide to sleep on it until they can come to an agreement the manor will be tense for a week or two at most before they spring into action, they will all eventually cave to their selfish needs even if some feel guilty for doing it. Alfred will sigh disappointedly but ultimately allow them to go through with their plans he only hopes you can forgive him for not doing more

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ you on the other hand will be left unaware to all that's going down you'd gotten a new phone and lived in a whole new state maybe even country! They couldn't bother you here. You were happier than you have been for a long time. Even if you missed your old friends you still tried to keep in touch over the phone.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ as for why you did this? It's likely the other batboys' faults, Bruce is annoying but he's not nearly as demanding of your time as the others, namely dick. Dick is insanely clingy once you're on his radar and he becomes aware of how much his neglect affected you mentally. The guilt for him was all consuming when he found out how much he hurt you and that he neglected you for quite literally no reason, you just didn't matter to him at the time. the thought now makes him sick, of course you matter, what the hell was his problem!! Dick would have constantly broke your boundaries by hugging and touching and cuddling you he feels like he needs to make it up to you by being a good big brother, even if that's not what you need anymore after all it's far too late you're already an adult but he refuses to see it that way you're still his baby sister. He inserts himself into your life constantly and even if he'll pay for things he'll only do so under the circumstances that the money be spent ‘together’ like sure he'll take you to that fancy restaurant but it's going to be made into a sister-brother bonding moment, like yeah he'll let you use his card to go shopping but only if he's going with you. Even if you don't use him for money he will still find ways to insert himself into your life. He's overwhelmingly intense and his behavior mixed with the other overbearing members in the batfam plus the added overwhelming feelings of having people who ignored you all your life suddenly want your time and attention is probably why you felt like you had to leave.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ you won't be gone for more than a month or two before your dragged back to Gotham and back to your family, only this time you've got a metaphorical collar around your neck as now you're likely brought back to the manor always under surveillance and on the off chance you're still allowed to own your own apartment again just know it will be heavily bugged along with your phone courtesy of Tim even if he feels bad about invading your privacy he knows they need to see your texts to make sure you're not planning to leave Gotham again. Oh and now the bat members will each take turn patrolling your house and following you from the shadows to make sure you're safe.

___

All in all I'd say you'll have your fun for a little while but ultimately you'll just drive them deeper in their obsession and they will likely kidnap and bring you home.

[luveline]

Eddie and Roan —Roan’s having a hard time adapting to the new babysitter. stepmom!reader, 1.4k

Eddie’s car is parked poorly on the driveway, but it’s there, and it’s nice to see after a long day. You park snugly behind him, pull your purse onto your shoulder, and rush out of your car, up the steps to the house. 

You open the heavy front door.

“Roan?” you ask, greeted by the smell of Eddie’s tomato pasta and fresh bleach. “Eddie, did you mop?” 

“Sasha mopped,” Eddie corrects from the top of the stairs. “She’s up here.” 

“Sasha?” 

“Roan.” He smiles at you. “Sasha is long gone home, baby. And if I were you I wouldn’t say her name. It hasn’t got me super far.” 

You wince, hanging your purse and coat over the bannister and shucking off your shoes, aching feet a little less painful on the carpet of the stairs. Eddie waits for you on the landing, and he kisses you when you’re close enough, to your fear. 

“I’m gonna fall.” 

“No,” he says, encouraging you against him with a forearm to the small of your back. “Like I’d let you.” 

“Is it really bad?” 

“She went into a full blown nuclear meltdown. I don’t think Sasha will be back any time soon, she looked shell-shocked,” Eddie says. 

His eyes flare wide and his lips pucker, but he looks less worried and more entertained. He knows Roan is gonna be fine eventually. She has a case of the crankies because nobody will let her have her way (but you would if you could).

“She definitely wants to see me?” 

“I think you’re the only person she wants to see. She kept pushing me off of the bed.” 

“Oh.” You kiss his cheek. He smiles like he did the very first time you kissed him, surprised and elated to be liked, which is a tad silly —you love him. “Hello. Dinner smells nice.” 

“It does, doesn’t it? I’m gonna go make some garlic bread if you don’t need me.”

You hold his arm. It’s strange to be in love sometimes. You coparent his occasionally angry child. He makes you dinner every single night. There’s barely time to say hello, but you say it because saying hi to him is always, always fun. 

Eddie gives you a quick hug. “I’m downstairs if you want me,” he promises. 

You ease around one another. He goes down the stairs too quickly, you knock gently against ‘Princess Roan’s’ door. The placard is missing a few gems, but it’s still sparkly. 

There’s no answer.

“Hello?” you ask, knocking the door again. “Baby, I’m coming in to see you.” 

“…Okay.” 

You smile at the sound of her voice. You’ve missed her, even though it hasn’t been that long. It’s better to see her, opening her door, finding her all curled up on her bed. She’s mostly guilty, you’d say, but still annoyed at the situation. 

“Hey, angel,” you say, pausing against her doorway. 

“Hi, mom.” 

You grin. “Dad told me what happened.” She tenses, expecting a telling off, but Eddie has that covered. She can’t treat people the way she did, pushing poor Sasha and screaming at her to go away isn’t fair, but she had her reasons. Neither you nor Eddie plan to ignore them. “You okay?” 

“Fine.” 

“What can I do to make you feel better than fine?” you ask. 

“Let me come to work with you.” 

“I told you already, Ro. You can only come with me for emergencies. They’re very grumpy at work.” 

She glares and curls tighter into her ball. She’s small, less than a third your size but with feelings that would threaten to tip you over. Her dress is creased to death and her face is covered in tears. 

“Wanna get dressed for bed?” you ask. 

Roan sighs tiredly. “No.” 

“Just let me wash your face then, princess. Tears make your eyes sore after a while.” 

“Can you hug me?” Roan asks shyly. 

You cross the room. She slides across her bed to make more room for you than you need, but you love how big she seems to think you are, in a way. Like she sees you as much older, maybe more protective, or that’s what you’d like to think. You lay down in her bed, and you move your arm from your side to let her know the hug factor is ready for business. 

She lays her head on your shoulder. 

“It’s hard missing you,” you say. 

It’s hard missing both of them. You feel like a lot of your life is totally wasted at work when you could be talking yourself hoarse with Eddie, Roan between you both or on someone’s lap. You’d rest your face on his arm and watch his lips make each word. You could do it forever, but the world doesn’t let you. His stories and jokes have to wait until the weekend.

“It is?” Roan asks quietly.

“It’s so hard. I miss you all the time.”

“I miss you too,” Roan says. 

“I know.” Her bed is crazy comfortable. You stretch out and turn your face down to hers, back twinging, content to stay her with her forever. “Can I give you a little kiss?” 

She laughs and turns her cheek to you for kissing. 

“It’s been a long time since I asked you that, huh?” you say, pressing three light kisses in the same place. 

“You aks me sometimes.” 

“You never ask me!” you tease in a shouting-whisper. “You just plant them on me!” 

“You like kisses.” 

“I love ‘em. You and dad give the best kisses I ever had.” 

She smiles, but it slowly turns into a frown. “I don’t like being home with Sasha.” 

“It’s summertime, bug. Me and dad have to work, Wayne has to work. We can’t find any other way.” 

“Sasha doesn’t… She’s not… Ugh.” Roan rubs her sad face into your chest. 

“Sasha’s still a stranger, baby, that’s all it is. I know she seems a bit weird right now, but that’s, like, how meeting new people goes!” You hug her to you loosely. “You remember when you met me?” 

“You liked me on the first day,” Roan says. 

“Of course I did.” 

“Sasha doesn’t like me.” 

“Sasha thinks you’re awesome. But when I first met you, Ro, you were littler, and you liked to cuddle more. It was easier for me and you. Plus, I think things for me and you are much more special.” 

“She doesn’t like me anymore.” 

You coo sympathetically. “No way. I think if you say sorry, and maybe me and dad can explain, Sasha won’t mind.” 

“I just wanted you,” she says. 

“I know. It’s okay if we miss each other, because we always get to see each other before dinner.” 

“Is dad still mad at me?” 

You sit up to look down at her, stroking the dark baby curls away from her face, smiling as they spring back into place. “Nah. But maybe he deserves an apology like Sasha. He said you gave him a couple of pushes too.” 

“He was trying to give me a hug and I was still mad,” she complains. 

“That’s okay. I guess dad’s not the kind to hold a grudge anyways.” 

Eddie absolutely holds grudges. He has one-sided beef with half the town and mutual beef with the other half, but he doesn’t hold one with Roan. You wipe the tear stains from her cheeks with a warm cloth and get her changed into clean pyjamas, holding her hand the whole time at her insistence, which makes doing her buttons up hard. 

“Why can’t uncle Steve have me?” Roan asks as you carry her downstairs. 

“Because he has a job, too.” You put her down at the bottom of the stairs. “Most grown ups do.” 

“And you can’t have summer vacation?” 

“I wish, baby. I wish.” 

Roan walks ahead of you into the kitchen, where Eddie’s setting the table, pasta and garlic bread and a big tossed salad waiting. Roan’s place has been set especially for her, with her glass of water, her glass of juice, her favourite fork, and the big purple cushion on her seat. 

“Feeling better?” Eddie asks her, bending at the waist when she holds up her arms. 

He gives her a soft hug, patting her back between lazy up and downs. 

“Sorry, daddy.” 

“That’s okay,” he says genuinely, “I know summer is hard. Maybe I can get some more days off soon.” 

That sounds like a good idea. 

“Please,” Roan says. 

Eddie coils one of her curls around his finger. “I’ll see what I can do. And you’re going to be nicer to Sasha?” 

“Yes. Sorry.” 

Eddie tips her head back to kiss her nose. “I don’t want you to be sorry, I just want you to be kind.” 

“‘Cos kind is the new cool,” Roan says. 

“Yes!” He drags her up his chest to squeeze her tightly. “And we’re the coolest cats in town.” 

[cameronluvr]

BRUISES — toxic!rafe cameron x routledge!reader ; john b x sister!reader

summary: your brother sees a bruise on your neck, but it isn’t a hickey. he questions you about it, but it quickly turns into an argument when he discovers exactly who hurt you.

warnings: mostly john b x reader, mentions of choking, DV, toxic/abusive relationship, not much rafe x reader directly, angst, reader and john b arguing, name calling, mentions of jealous!rafe, toxic!rafe — lmk if i missed any! ✮

: ̗̀➛ 𝓶𝔂 𝓶𝓪𝓼𝓽𝓮𝓻𝓵𝓲𝓼𝓽 ⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

you sneak into the chateau at 10 minutes past midnight, only to be greeted by your brother who had turned the light on which made you jump. “where have you been?” john b asks, crossing his arms over his chest.

“out.” you say, looking down to hide your face from him. you had been crying, but he’d already noticed your red-stained eyes. “what’s wrong?” he asks, frowning with concern.

“nothing, just don’t worry about it.” you answer with your head still down as you attempt to walk straight past him, but he stops you, lightly grabbing your forearm to turn you back around.

“what, john b?!” you snap at him, yanking your arm out of his grip. you don’t mean to be mad at him, but you just want to be left alone after a stressful day. “what’s the matter with you? why are you acting like this?” he raises his voice at you, wanting to know why you’ve turned into a bitch all of a sudden.

“i’m not!— oh my god. just leave me alone!” you yell at him, turning around to rush to your room, slamming the door shut after you. john b stands in the same spot as before, loudly sighing at you.

he decided to leave you alone for the night. even though you’re older than him, he still liked to look out for you ever since your dad went missing. he went to his room to go to sleep, hopefully you’ll talk to him in the morning.

༉‧₊˚. the next morning arrived faster than you’d hoped for. you cried all night feeling guilty for the way you spoke to your little brother, but he really has no idea of the situation you’re in.

you got out of bed and slowly exited your room, seeing john b up and awake already, sitting on the couch and watching tv. “hey…” you say, walking past to head to the kitchen. “hey…” he responds, just as awkwardly as you did.

you open the fridge and grab a snack, before turning to look at your brother. “uh— i’m sorry for last night. i didn’t mean to act like that… i just…” you explain, closing the fridge door and sighing. “you’re good. it’s fine. y’wanna talk about it?” he asks, switching the tv off to divert his full attention to you.

“uh, i don’t know…” you hesitate, knowing you’re hiding a kind of huge secret from him. you had been secretly seeing his biggest enemy, rafe cameron, behind his back. you knew how badly he tormented your brother and his friends, but for some reason, he was different around you.

you hadn’t personally dealt with rafe for yourself, until now. he saw you at the beach a few weeks ago, and thought to himself about how pretty you looked in your bikini, how tanned you were, how contagious your laugh was… and that was it. he introduced himself to you as a completely different person, despite having heard all the stories about him from your brother and the rest of the pogues, including rafe’s own sister.

rafe was kind, sweet and funny at first. ever since you saw him after that, your heart skipped a beat. he was so handsome, you liked him so much, but you couldn’t do this to your little brother. your brother who had been threatened by rafe, bullied, tormented, fought with…

you knew you had to keep it a secret, because once rafe cameron claims somebody, he really claims them. and this time around, it’s you. a pogue, a routledge, someone nobody would ever expect to be rafe’s.

— “cmon, i’m here for you. you know that, sis. what’s goin’ on?” he asks, patting the space on the couch next to him, motioning for you to come sit. you sigh, knowing you won’t be able to tell him without him getting upset that you’re dating rafe.

you know that no matter how or when you tell him, he’ll be angry. after thinking for a second, you walk over to him and sit down. he frowns at you as you sit down, noticing something on your neck. “what’s that?” he asks, putting his hand on your face to look, but you push him away. “nothing” you shake your head, trying to brush it off.

“is that?— that’s not a hickey,” he looks into your eyes with nothing but concern. “just— leave it.” you look at him with widened eyes to show that you were serious. “y/n, what the hell happened? who did that?” he asks, raising his voice in frustration now.

“nobody, john b, god!” you yell as you stand up again, “don’t walk away from me, and don’t tell me to leave you alone either like you did last night. you’re acting weird lately, what are you hiding?” john b stands up too, trying to get an answer out of you. your brother is genuinely concerned for you.

you sigh, turning around to face him head on. “john b, i— ugh.” you begin to say, but cut yourself off, not knowing where to even start. “what?” he asks in annoyance, needing to know who hurt his sister.

“who?” he asks one last time.

“… rafe,” you hesitate, looking around the room to avoid seeing your brother’s reaction. “rafe?” he asks, not sure if he heard you correctly. “…yes” you nod, looking at him now with teary eyes.

“rafe did that?” he asks, getting visibly mad now. he reaches his hand over, forcing your head up by your jaw but not enough to hurt you. he looks at your neck again, before you push him away, again.

“why the fuck did he do that?” he asks, huffing through his nose with anger, looking back and forth into both of your eyes, trying not to go insane. “it’s, uh— we were… having an argument last night.” you slowly explain the story. “an argument? about what?” he asks, not seeing a reason for you to even speak to rafe in the first place, let alone fight with him…

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ ᴸᴬˢᵀ ᴺᴵᴳᴴᵀ .𖥔 ݁ ˖

“i saw the way you were laughing and giggling with topper, don’t lie to me!” rafe argued, turning around to point in your face. he had walked away from you and the rest of the kooks, causing you to follow him.

“i wasn’t flirting with him, oh my god!” you argue back. rafe had somehow come to the conclusion that you were flirting with his best friend, even though you were just having a conversation. yeah, maybe you did laugh once or twice, but since when aren’t you allowed to laugh?

“yeah, sure, whatever you say.” he scrunches his face up, sarcastically nodding at you. “you are so strange, rafe. now you’re insecure about me talking to your friends? what, do you want me to just sit in the corner by myself?” you raise your voice, however he doesn’t like your attitude.

“don’t raise your voice at me.” he demands with a threatening look on his face. “jesus, rafe, we aren’t even together! who cares if i was talking to other guys, it’s not like you want me to be your girlfriend” you shrug, trying to act smart but he reached over and grabbed you by your throat, shoving you into the wall.

“oh, so you were flirting with him?” he asks, choking you to the point where you can’t breathe. you try to say no, but nothing comes out, so you shake your head drastically.

“you sure? cause i’m almost certain you just admitted you were.” he tuts, acting so casual whilst he’s got you pinned against the wall. his grip on your neck was intense, it felt like all of his fingers were slowly digging into your neck.

…

“nothing. i just… i don’t even remember.” you lie to your brother, shaking your head. “y/n, don’t play games with me. why did rafe choke you? those are clearly finger—” john b says, leaning down to look at your neck again, “stop!” you cut him off. “look. i don’t wanna’ talk about it. we were just fighting over something petty. it doesn’t even matter.” you shake your head.

“it does matter when it’s turned you into a whole different person,” john b sighs, making you sigh too. “are you seeing him?” the dreaded question comes. “what? no…” you give him a look of disgust. “are you sure? because pope told me he saw you with rafe at the golf course like… what, 2 days ago?” your brother catches you out.

“… i wasn’t with him. i just— saw him there.” you try to make an excuse.

“oh really? since when do you normally decide to hang out at the golf course, where all the kooks are?” he asks, raising his eyebrows at the word kooks, reminding you of where you came from, and that you were a pogue. not a kook.

“does this whole kook vs pogue shit even matter? i mean, seriously, how long is it gonna’ last?” you raise your voice, making him shake his head at how much you truly have changed.

“y/n, you were the one who always hated the kooks. you hated rafe, topper, kelce… and now you’re on their side? now you suddenly wanna drop the whole kook vs pogues thing, too? you are definitely fucking rafe. no wonder you’ve turned into such a miserable bitch lately.” your brothers words hurt you deeply, but he was right.

he shakes his head at you, giving you a look of betrayal. he was upset, and it was all your fault. “where are you going?” you ask as he walks away, grabbing the keys to the twinkie.

“to find rafe” he says, before walking out and slamming the door shut after him. you sit and sob for a minute, realizing you might have just ruined your entire relationship with your brother. as his big sister, he trusted you, but for you to go behind his back and chase the one person he despised, it hurt his feelings. but you are still his sister, and nobody hurts his sister.

“J. HUNTING DOWN RAFE. U COMING WITH?„

john b sent a text to jj, who answered almost immediately.

“HELL YEA MAN„

jj doesn’t even know what rafe did this time, but he’s always down to beat him up.

this was angstyyyyyy 😩 as u can see, i love to write arguments and toxic stuff lol. hope ya enjoy pretties ᥫ᭡ ᥫ᭡ WILL DEF BE WRITING A PART 2 TO THIS ; )))

@cameronluvr

[roseykat]

TITLE: Play Tight

PAIRINGS: Bang Chan x f!reader

SUMMARY: Reader and Chan divulge their ‘excuse’ as to why they couldn’t make it to hot pot and barbecue dinner with their friends.

WARNING: minors DNI with this post or my blog. I create NSFW SKZ related content and I know I won’t be able to regulate/monitor every potential interaction with those posts so please do not engage with me, my work, or page whatsoever.

TAGS: smut, porn with plot, swearing, multiple orgasms, squirting, overstimulation, unprotected sex, creampies, fwb, some pillow talk (ish)

PART 1 / PART 2 / PART 3

🏷️ LIST: @chillichillicrabcrab23 @broken-glowsticks @ihatemen55 @boi-bi-ahaha @galamxy @weareapackofstrays @anglerfishiey @elizalabs3 @fr34k4c1dr41n @stayconnecteed @imnotjjini0325 @twinklix @meilix @livsposts @dawn-iscozy @princejisung @valibals @oiikaro @im-sinking-in-mud @aalexyuuuhm @baby-yongbok @/leftkittenface @20minsat180degrees @itsthatbri (if you want to be removed or added to the tag list, please lmk!) ⭐️

A/N: if you don't know what a refractory period is it's essentially about the ability of most women to cum back to back or one after the other in a short span of time between one orgasm and the next. Therefore, if it seems as though I've written about reader having multiple orgasms within quick succession, that's because she is and Chan is making the most of it. Also I really pushed the time limit with uploading this part bc I spent the last few hours trying to get the fan club which took fucking ages...

Hot pot and barbecue with friends - now that sounded fun. 

You saw the group chat messages from earlier, and the plan to all meet up at half past six. Had you not orchestrated other arrangements, you would be sitting with them right now enjoying nice meals and chats. Instead, your body remains to be railed thoroughly, right into the bed that belongs to none other than Chan. The owner of very capable hands who had just finished fucking you on his couch earlier on. 

He too missed dinner with everyone for the same reason. Selfishly being, to get laid. 

Chan presented half of a lie to the group chat, saying that his family was back in the city - which was true, and that he was going to visit them, so he couldn’t make it - not true. You on the other hand conjured the only fib you could think of and told everyone that you were going to be working past six.

Both of you felt relatively guilty for ditching the dinner. However, it would’ve looked ten times more suspicious if the two of you suddenly changed your minds at the same time and decided to show up. 

But why would anyone suspect anything? Nobody knew Chan was rearranging your guts every other night. Or so you thought. That dirty, slutty little secret was only kept hushed between you and Chan. These past couple of months you’ve spent at each other's houses, tainting the very last remnants of innocence either of you had. 

You wouldn’t have realised it at first until you experienced it for yourself, but Chan is and can get really horny. Before him, there was no such thing as ‘hard-paced’ or ‘nasty’ sex. It was fairly vanilla, which there’s nothing wrong with from time to time. But at the minute, that wasn’t the cup of tea you fancied. No. It was something much dirtier and riveting, something that makes you feel like you’re very much alive. 

Chan was able to achieve that in less than half an hour after you both hooked up one time after a night out. Sure there might’ve been alcohol involved, except neither of you were drunk enough to completely forget what an amazing time you both had. So much so that you and Chan decided to hook up again. And again, and again, until it became a weekly event. 

In saying that, there were a few layers as to why you and Chan started seeing each other regularly. You needed the de-stressor from work that had been hounding you for months, and among other things, there is nothing like a good dick down to make just about make every worry in your mind disappear.

As for Chan’s situation, it wasn’t as light. Having been cheated on by his long term partner, Chan entered what you refer to as his ‘hoe phase’ to which he was rather embarrassed to learn that it’s something that people tend to go through when they’ve broken up with their significant other. 

Nonetheless, you and Chan unexpectedly found each other in a way friends wouldn’t typically, and it was only limited to that. No strings attached, still remain good friends, and the best mind blowing sex. 

“Fuck - yes, right there!”

Chan’s hips ram unforgivingly into you from behind. Creating godly, euphoric waves that ripple throughout your body each and every time he does. His fingernails clutch themselves into the soft flesh of your hips, allowing him to use that small bit of traction to pull your body back onto his cock or for him to thrust forward mercilessly. 

This was way better than dinner with friends. 

“W-Wait,” you reach behind to the side of your body, trying to tap his arm and prompt him to slow down so you could get your message across without having it fucked right out of you. “Ride…lemme ride you.” 

Chan swallows and nods, taking a short breather, “yeah, yeah okay.” 

Whilst you’ve learned a lot of things about Chan since you’ve started sleeping with him, he’s also learned some stuff about you. Like discovering throughout your secret sessions with him that you seem to cum the hardest when you’re riding him. He doesn’t entirely see the appeal of it since he doesn’t mind picking up all the slack just so you don’t have to do any of the work. At the same time, however, nothing feels as good as fucking his frustrations into you.

But he also doesn’t mind them getting fucked out of him. It easily added to one of the reasons why he found it so hot to watch you ride dick. 

As he gently slides his cock out of you, moving into the next position where he now gets to lie back against his pillows. He watches you straddle him first, then take his length in hand before aligning it with your hole. Slowly, you sink down onto his cock. 

The ‘o’ shape in your mouth enlarges when the entirety of his length vanishes inside you. He’s big. Something you can’t always grasp every time you sleep together. The silver lining in that however is that the foreplay is amazing. 

“Christ,” you breathe out, lifting your hips up and down a couple of times, groaning as the pleasure already built up from before starts re-taking its effect to its highest extent. “Fuck, make me feel so full.” 

“So you keep telling me,” he responds with a cocky grin as his hand reaches up to one of your tits and gropes ravenously. “But that’s what you like isn’t it? Having a big cock inside you, yeah?”

Your hand claps right on top of his, the other stabilises your body on his chest as you start riding at a pace comfortable enough to build some momentum. It doesn’t take long until every part of your body feels like warm flames are tickling your skin, leaving tingly traces in their wake. 

“Yes, love it so much,” you pant breathlessly. “Love it when it makes me cum.” 

Chan is glad to hear that. Then again, he knows. He’s fucked you long enough to know what you like, what you don’t, and what type of pleasure can turn your mind inside out. With that in mind, and one hand still groping you, he uses the other thumb to find your clit and rub generously. 

“F-Fuck, oh my god, don’t stop, don’t stop,” you plead in anguish as you start to feel your orgasm shift into sight. 

It’s right there. The utmost pleasure and ecstasy at its apex swells from the pit of your stomach, to your toes, all the way into the crevices of your brain. Every part of you - physically and mentally, just seems to melt into Chan. His cock, which feels like it was made for you to use like this, glides frictionlessly until his tip kisses your g-spot so lovingly. Each time it hits, Chan earns extra centimetres of long red scratches down his abdomen, marked up by your fingernails. 

“Cum,” he demands through gritted teeth. “Fucking cum all over me.”

Brainless and vacant as you were in trying to respond to him, your actions seemed to speak for themselves. As Chan continues to move his thumb consistently over your clit and you bounce yourself still on his cock, your eyes suddenly screw tight shut - shuddering before a surge of relief gushes from between your legs. 

Chan grins sickeningly. 

The untapped pleasure squeezes and strangles moans out of your throat, yet, in the few spare moments when you had come back down to earth, your stomach felt like it dropped at some point along the way. The minute you open your eyes, breathing hard and heavy, your attention catches on to the mess you’ve made. 

Most of Chan’s abdomen is soaked with your juices, his taut torso gleaming with your cum. Droplets of it roll down his side and seep into the sheets below him. From there, the humiliation is quick to ensue. Chan even sees the panic fill your eyes. 

“Oh! I’m so sorry,” you whine apologetically. “I don’t know what happened! I was - I was caught up in-“

Chan ceases your babbling by grabbing the undersides of your thighs and just about throws you on your back as he moves to top you. His sudden movements catch you off guard, wondering for a moment what he was doing until he started fucking you again. 

“Chris!” you cry out, latching around his back. 

His head buries into the crook of your neck, “wanna feel you do it again. Wanna see you drip down my cock.” 

At his words of request, you knew it was possible with the way that his dick hits deeper, pressing against those sensitive spots inside you that have been milked of pleasure. It’s not difficult to feel it building up again. There’s zero refractory period, allowing you to cum in an uninterrupted procession. At this stage, Chan could just whisper dirty things in your ear and have you become a squirting mess on his bed for him to watch. He wondered if that was actually possible. 

After watching and making you cum an extraordinary amount of times this evening, Chan was about to witness another, this time, mixed with his own release of pleasure. He can never ignore that dense pressure stacking up in his cock, like a blocked pipe that’s about to burst with the help of the tension from your contracting walls. 

One hand at a time, he places each beside your head to lift himself up while still trying to maintain a consistent pace. Then he coils back, grabbing the undersides of your thighs again and leaning some of his weight down so that he can press deeper. 

Tears are pricking your eyes - not from any pain but from pleasure you’ve never felt. It’s so intense and has nowhere in your body to escape that the longer you hold it in, the more explosive it’s going to feel. As your emotions exude the ferocity of another orgasm, Chan absorbs your expressions, giving him a very clear estimate of when you’re about to cum. 

“Gonna give me another one?” he asks even though you’re in no state of mind to give him a verbal answer. “Gonna be a good girl and get my dick wet one last time?” 

You shake your head but only because you’re unsure if you can actually take that pressure that’s about to blow. Regardless of how high he has built your orgasms for you, you always take them well. It has you sobbing - screaming and clutching onto his bedding as you whimper that you’re about to cum. Chan could only just hear you over the sound of his skin slapping against yours. 

“You can do it,” he reassures you. “You always do.” 

At that moment, as if he just flipped a switch inside you, Chan had you gushing in an instant. Your upper body contorts to the left and stiffens as he fucks you right through it, right until his own orgasm slaps him on cue. Grunts mixed with whimpers force their way out from the base of Chan’s throat. His cock uncontrollably spurts his hot white cum, coating liberal amounts on your walls with a few hard, deep thrusts. 

"Fuck, oh my god," he groans through gritted teeth, satisfaction seeping through into his blood.

He pulls back to sit on his heels, looking down as he grabs the base of his cock now slicker than usual with milky, almost transparent liquid rings of white. The fact that both of your juices have mixed together does something to a sick part of Chan’s brain. His lower half is still dripping with your cum, forcing you to shy away into the bunched up sheets when you realise you’ve made another mess on him. 

Too weak to speak up about it, Chan had no trouble reading the room and caught onto your emotions. He was right to assume that you were embarrassed for it but fuck if Chan could experience it all again, he would. That then strikes an idea as he massages your inner thighs with the palms of his hands. 

“That’s never happened before,” he comments with a little bit of surprise, making you turn with embarrassment, all the while trying to ease you back down from your high. “So fucking hot.” 

His thumbs rub into your wet skin, inching closer to your pussy. Before you know it, the backs of his fingertips are brushing over your hole where his cum is leaking out of you. Semi sticky strings of it attach onto him when he pulls away and goes back in to smother it all the way up to your clit. He thumbs softly over the sensitive bud, setting fire again to the muscles in your lower half. 

You shudder a little bit from the faint stimulation, and finally muster the energy to talk, “yeah…d-don’t know how. Usually it’s - mm, just cause’…maybe you were hitting the right spot.”

Chan doesn’t meet your eyes, and by the preoccupied look on his face, it was clear that he had another agenda as his thumb continued to rub mindlessly. Although, he did hear you as he smirked and shook his head. 

“Nah, that was all you,” his mouth falls open slightly as he stares down at where his fingers begin to disappear. 

“Chan…” 

“I reckon you could give me one more,” he predicts as he starts to finger you slowly. “Just one more.”

“Please, fuck...” You whine loudly throughout the room. “D-Don’t think I can…please.” 

Chan moves to the side of you just a little bit, placing his other hand on your lower belly to apply just a little bit of welcoming pressure while he ignores you, “yes you can pretty. Only one.”

His fingers curl deviously inside you, forcing an automatic bodily response for your eyes to roll to the back of your head and back to arch clean off the bed. As he strokes over the spongy area, your fists are clenching on the duvet. Your body is beyond sensitive and squirms uncontrollably at the faintest of his touch. 

“Chris!” You sob, tears now leaking down the sides of your face from the euphoria. 

This was the closest replica to being high. It’s like the pleasure picked up where it left off from the previous orgasm Chan brought to you and nearly doubled in intensity to the point where you thought for a moment that you were going to black out. But it hits you harder than before since his fingers have a bit more precision to find and hit your g-spot rather than making you feel fuller. 

“That’s my good girl,” he says encouragingly. 

There and then, as Chan detects the tell-tale signs that you’re about to cum, he finger fucks you at a generous pace that doesn’t let up on the time your insides have to try mitigate the pleasure. It goes into overdrive, sending a bunch of all the right signals straight to your brain. 

“C-Cum…cumming…I’m-”

Chan appreciates the fact that he’s reduced you from crying and screaming his name to a silent, overstimulated mess. Alternatively, you’re surrendering entirely to the ecstasy which sweeps you under like a current. Chan doesn’t need to hold you in place for you to take what he’s giving you with his fingers. He just gives and gives, and gives until for the third time, he has you squirting. 

“Oh yeah, look at that,” he grins excitedly, watching his palm and all the way up to his forearm become completely drenched in your juices. “What a good girl.”

By that point, Chan was successful in running your body dry. His pace slows down, now gently stroking inside you. Your quiet, strained moans die down, along with a reserve tank of energy you had left. You were limp and helpless, a gorgeous mess on the bed for him to admire. 

Chan slowly takes his fingers out, gently massaging around your sensitive pussy, “fuck, so good."

You turn onto your side, processing all of that. For a few moments before, it felt like you had had an out of body experience, and maybe you were. Everything was so consuming and powerful that for a second you didn’t feel like yourself. But that wasn’t a bad thing, nor did you think of it that way. It’s just a new experience that you welcomed, one that made you feel good multiple times. 

Chan hops off the bed and kneels beside you onto the floor as he strokes and pats your head, “you okay?”

You nod then go to sit up, “mm, just out of it. Give me a few minutes.” 

“You - you shouldn’t move so much, not now at least,” Chan warns, then quickly spots the uncomfortable expression on your face as you realise that everything beneath you is wet and sticky.

“Your duvet,” you say to him, looking down and around at all the large damp areas.

“What about it?” 

“Well it’s all ruined-” 

“They’re not ruined,” he says defiantly like a stubborn child, almost like he was offended you even made that sort of comment. “It looks…fucking hot.”

“Hot,” you repeated with an airy chuckle. 

“I didn’t know you could do that,” says Chan, bewildered. 

“Neither could I to be honest,” you agree wholeheartedly. “It was really…intense and...strange.” 

“Strange?” He retorts. 

“Not a bad ‘strange’, just something I’ve always heard of, but never managed to do with someone else before,” you reply. 

Chan smiles to himself, looking at his bed before that grin drops off his face, “never managed to do it with someone else before? As in, you’ve done it before, just…on your own?” 

You blink up at him, quickly changing the subject, “reckon the others are still out?” 

“I’d imagine so,” he says, still thinking about what you said previously. 

“Hot pot and barbecue sounded so nice too…” you trail off, eyes going in and out of focus. Your body is starting to catch up to you.

“Well, luckily we live in the era of food delivery, right?” He responds confidently. “Let me clean you up first, then we can hop in the shower. After that, I’ll order it in for us, sound good?” 

Sometimes when you’re with Chan, you forget that at the end of the day, he’s one of your good friends and still acts like it after you sleep with him. He knows when to be your fuck buddy and when to be your mate. None of it is awkward or weird and nor does he strive to make it that way. 

Potentially it’s because of his nature to be a gentleman inside the bedroom just as much as he is outside, hence why you had a considerate amount of gratitude towards him for not being an ass like some of the people you’ve hooked up with or seen casually in the past. But that could never be the two people you slept with a few weeks back. 

Not Hyunjin nor Jisung, whom you’ve thought about ever since that night at his apartment. Although it was truth or dare that led you all to the events that unfolded, you would’ve still slept with them anyway without the game. Just thinking about the two of them makes you miss them. Makes you miss the way that they touched you. 

It was a different feeling to how Chan normally touches you. With him, he’s a friend with benefits. Someone who can call you or you can call him whenever either of you need each other. As a result, there isn’t going to be anything fond or loving between the pair of you - which you’re more than happy with. You made that clear to Chan at the start that you weren’t looking to enter into a relationship with him at any stage if that’s what he was thinking. 

Thankfully, he wasn’t either. 

But when Hyunjin and Jisung touched you, it was surreal. Almost natural, like they were meant to feel you that way and only them. That was the difference between them and Chan, not that you were comparing them since you saw them in separate positive lights.

There was just something about those two that left a strong imprint on your brain, something you can’t scratch without them…

I strictly forbid and do not permit ANYONE or any user on any platform to copy, re-upload, translate, remake, or pass off any of my work here on Tumblr or to any other online platform whatsoever. Doing so will result in having your account suspended, deleted, taken down, and or permanently banned.

[foulphantomllama]

My Secret Desire | AESPA Winter x Male Reader

AESPA Winter x Male Reader (POV)

2. The Study Date

We talked about her grades, and agreed on a day to meet up and study. We decided on a Friday afternoon, in my little room. I was barely fitting in. But at least she is small. However, I had a feeling that something was off. My bully suddenly becomes a friendly face? No. I was sure that she has a plan to make me look ridiculous or guilty. I was going to find out tho. This was the sole reason I accepted to act in her little play.

On the other hand, It was killing me to think about what ifs. What if all of the bully thing was a cover up because she really liked me? Or this was the way she flirts? What if she expresses her feelings this way? It was hard to stop think about all of those. But after that day, she stopped abusing me verbally. She only smiled and wawed at me until the day of our meeting arrived. Thursday night, something unexpected happened. My routine, I brushed my teeth, get into my pyjamas and lat down to my bed then started scrolled through my Instagram. As I scroll down, Instagram has suggested me a familiar face. It was Minjeong’s account. Although she was hanging out with the richest girls in the school, her account was pretty modest with 17 followers. My finger wanted to push the follow button, my brain resisted. But in the end my heart was the one who stopped the argument by chooising my fingers side. I pushed the follow button. Her account was private. And I really wanted to look at her photos. Five or six minutes later, she followed me back. My hear was racing as I went to her account and started looking at her photos. I realized that I never looked at her as a girl. She was always my bully. Since I came here she always showed me her bully side. But you can feel that getting accepted into her account was a rare privilage.

Before looking at her photos, I wanted to check if she follows and boys. But she wasn’t. 17 girls, and there was me. The only boy she follows. What I was thinking? What I was expecting from her? Be my girlfriend? As I started to look at her photos, I realized that I probably in love with her. But I also despise her. Hate her. But I want her. I desperately need her attention. Her abuse. Out of the blue, I got a boner when I look at her photo. The urge for jerking off to minjeong was all over my head. But once I did that, there was no turning back. I was ashamed, angry and happy. I don’t know how to describe this feeling. Only thing I want was to kiss her. But I hold myself back. I needed to understand her true intention.

With all of that in my mind, I fell asleep. Then, I woke up to the doorbell. I looked at my phone to see the time. It was nine in the morning. It wasn’t be Minjeong. We agreed upon afternoon. But again, I was expecting nobody. So I thought it was just wrong, or my landlord. I ignored it. But then she messaged me on instagram. The message was saying “Are you sleeping? I’m at your door.” I rushed ot from the bed, and opened the door. There she was stading in from of me with her messy figure. No make up, her hair was all over the place. But she was wearing a skirt with no socks or something. Her pale white legs was very intimitading. Her legs were exposed but she was wearing a thick sweatshirt. “Aren’t you cold?” I asked. She laughed and answered. “My lower body never gets cold. Only the top. So I only keep my upper body warm. Because it makes my whole body warm.” I picked up her bag and invited her to my bed. Because it was to only place to sit. “I don’t have anything to eat, we have to order it if you’re hungry.” I said. “No, don’t worry I’m not hungry. But i will be.” She answered. Of course, I nodded. “Which books did you bring with you?” I asked. “I don’t have any books. I have my notebooks.” She answered. She gave me one of her notebooks. I took a brief look at her notebook. It was mostly empty. Some of the pages there were drawings and a couple of words related to the subject. It was totally weird because she was not verbally abusing me or anything. She was just looking at me in a way that could melt my heart . There was an awkward silence for a moment. I decided to break the silence by asking “So, what are we studying?” I sat on my bed while asking her the question. She came closer. And said “Nothing really. I lied to you about all the my father is going to remove me from the school thing.” “ I knew it!” i said loudly. “You knew what?” She answered curiously. “I knew that you’re hiding something from me.” I answered. She took the notebook off from my hands and threw it somewhere in the room. “And what is it that I’m hiding?” she asked me. She was so close and I was feeling so nervous. “I don’t know. You suddenly stop bullying me, and then this happened.” I answered. I was avoiding eye contact. And I knew that she was directly looking at me. I decided to look at her. I turn my head towards her. Then we made eye contact. And I have to admit it. She was looking like a dream. That eye contact made us get closer to each other. Our lips were about to touch. Then it happened. We were kissing. She put her hand on my belly while I hold her neck with my hand. Her hand were navigating through my body. I did the same. I put my other hand to her thighs. Then, with a sudden move, she grabbed my cock. I had a boner. Of course she realized that because I was still in my pyjamas. But we were still kissing. My tongue was inside her mouth, our tongues were dancing with each other. Suddenly she stopped kissing me and put her hand inside my pyjama. She started to jerk me off.  I couldn’t believe it. She was my bully and then, she was jerking me off in my dorm room. What a way to start a toxic relationship.

As she got faster, I couldn’t help but lean back. I was feeling amazing. Her little hands has such a good grip that I had a feeling that she will rip it off at some point. “Tell me when you’re about to cum.” She smiled as she talked. A moment later, I gave her the signal that I’m about to cum. She stopped. And seconds later she started again with a slower pace. I was about to cum, but I couldn’t. Because she was not letting me cum. “What are we even doing?” I asked her. She told me to shut my mouth and wait for her. I did not had any choice. “Are you about to cum?” she asked again. “Yes” I answered. She got faster. And I came. Her hands was covered with my cum. But she got faster and faster. It was painfull but I never had a better orgasm before. She licked some my cum off from her hands and got up to wash her hands. I was not expecting this to happen. “Are we going to talk about this?” I asked her. Because I was so curious about her intention. “It was so obvious that you don’t have a girl to satisfy you.” She sit beside me after saying it. “That obvious” I asked. She nodded with a little smile. “You’re pathetic.” She added. “I only gave you a little of me. Wait until you see a bigger part.” “You don’t have to pity me, Minjeong.” She pushed me back to the bed and sit on top of me. “You really think I pity you? Should I pity you” I said no. I was getting my strength back. So i hold her and get on top of her. “Tell me one reason not to fuck you right here.” I asked. She giggled and answered. “I can’t. But will you? Do you have the balls to fuck me?”  I was so furious. A part of me wanted to fuck her. But my logic got the best of me. I got up from the bed. “I knew you don’t have it.” She said. “Are you tired because I jerked your buddy to hard?” She was tempting me to fuck her. I realized that. “You hungry” I asked to change the subject. “Yes” she answered. “What do you want to eat?” She looked at me with her pretty eyes and answered my question. “Your heart.”

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for tossing a drink?

I (F22) don't drink alcohol: I don't like the taste of it, I was hangover once and I didn't like it at all and there is a large history of alcoholism on both sides of my family so I don't want to tempt fate.

My friends (F21, M22, F23, M23, F24 and M25) have all asked why I don't drink and I have been honest to all of them on my reasons and most of them have been pretty understanding NGL but there is this one friend (F24) who has made it her "duty" on getting me drunk. I didn't know her reasons why until last night.

So, last night we were at M25's apartment, we had decided to make a get together and talk about everything and nothing ans just have a nice time. We all brought our drinks, they had bought alcohol which was cool I don't mind then drinking they are all very responsible.

We were chatting the night away with some pizza and drinks and everything was nice actually. At this point, everyone was still sober and I decided to excuse myself to go pee. When I returned, I took a sip of my soda and inmediately felt the taste of alcohol. I stood up, gave the drink to F21 to hold for me and went to the bathroom again where I spit the soda I had in my mouth.

When I returned my other friends were puzzled. I immediately asked who had spiked my drink. At first, nobody believed my soda was spiked until I asked F21 to try it. She confirmed it had alcohol.

I repeated my question. And F24 confessed that it had been her because she wanted me to let loose a little bit. I gave her my most disgusted look, asked for F21 to return my drink which she did and I tossed the soda down the kitchen drain in front of everyone.

F24 got mad because I was acting like a complete asshole but when I asked her if I was an alcoholic in rehab would it still be fun to get me to spiral back in. She got silent. Her next argument was that why I wouldn't just trade my drink with someone else, I answered that nobody besides me had brought non alcoholic drinks so it would have been a losing situation for me.

Then I asked my other friends how could they not have noticed she spiked my soda, they said they just didn't notice they were chatting which fair we were in a very safe space. F24 was trying to get our other friends to take her side but nobody was backing her up everyone thought that it was a dick move of her to do that.

She then started acting up as if she was the victim here, gathered all of her things and stormed off.

We carried on with our night but for some reason I felt guilty about it. My friends say that it's completely not my fault and that I stood my ground in a very respectful way but I still feel bad for ruining the night. They reasured me it wasnt ruined and we kept our day.

I woke up today still feeling as if I was the one I did something wrong, I spoke with everyone except F24 and everyone is telling me not to overthink it and that the one that deserves an apology is me but I'm still thinking I could have approached the situation better.

So AITA?

What are these acronyms?

[st4rvedbuck]

I think the fandom of Ninjago should talk about Zane's fear of losing his humanity and his fear of any negative emotion in general. And how they contradict each other.

(warning, yap sesh ahead) TLDR: can nindroids get therapy? If so we need 5 therapists for Zane immediately

It's already established that Zane has a fear of being seen as just a machine, nothing but a freezer with fake coded emotions. But I haven't seen anyone talk in depth how he seems to turn off his emotions whenever he's faced with grief or stress, and how he only learnt to not do that far into his life.

He probably picked up that habit from when Dr. Julien turned off his memory switch before "dying" back in season 1. And he realized that if he went so long not feeling bad about the "death" of his creator by simply not remembering it or not having the actual emotion of grief, he wouldn't feel bad either when anything similar happened if he just turned off his emotions like Dr. Julien did to him.

The fact this lasted as long as it did meant nobody picked up on it* and tried to tell him he was wrong. Which only validated that idea because if there was a problem with it, someone would've told him..right?

But how can you say you don't want to lose your sense of humanity as a robot while simultaneously doing something humans can't whenever you're faced with stress? I'd say he'd overthink it, and feel guilty about not being honest with himself. He knows hes being irrational, but hes still terrified of the thought of no one seeing him as a person.

But at the same time, he's never been taught how to face stress by himself. Only for other people. It's not like he just doesn't know that ignoring your feelings is a way to avoid the problem and a bad coping mechanism, he obviously knows that. He probably just doesn't know any other solutions because his situation is so niche.

Because how could anyone not want what he has? In his position, he probably feels as if everyone would kill to be a nindroid. Since nobody tells him otherwise. We even see clips where the others use Zane's robot body as a joke or in one case, use him as a fucking cleaning robot. Can you imagine how dehumanizing it must feel for someone to be forced against their will like a puppet into doing a weeks worth of chores?

Zane probably feels as if his fears are irrational. Like he shouldn't have them because being a nindroid seems to be the only thing that others care about when they see him. He's a logical person for sure, but everyone has irrational thoughts and unless you face the reason you have those thoughts they aren't going to go away and they'll cloud your judgement. Zane, for sure, is not doing that. Because we can see he just simply forces himself to stop having emotions when they happen instead of facing them, which only fixes it temporarily.

So hes afraid of being seen as just a freezer with fake emotions (i have more to say about the "fake emotions" part), and because he doesn't face his feelings about why hes afraid of that he lets himself believe that is how people see him. Which causes him to think that fear is stupid and that he shouldn't have it, which makes him turn off his emotions for a while, and the cycle continues.

He also might believe his emotions arent needed. Like maybe at some point he convinces himself that if everyone else only sees him as a calculator with ice powers, maybe that's what he actually is. So on top of everything, he feels like since hes only a computer, all his emotions are fake. Therefore unnecessary.

Not to mention he most likely feels as if he's weak for letting Vex manipulate him. And emotions = weak, weak = manipulated again, manipulated again = letting everyone down. But thats just a little thought i had to let out.

If i could write I'd probably make a fic about him being confronted by this fear, but until then it'll stay in my brain.

Poor boy. Just look at him. He doesn't deserve this bro AUUGIGUGJGJGGHHGHHHH IM AUTISTIC 🥹

Edit: *i rewatched crystalized today and realized the other ninja ARE aware of Zanes habit. They just dont gaf 😭WHICH MAKES IT WORSE!!!

[petrifiedperi-au]

What are Dev's nightmares like?

[AU info here!]

OUGH... I've been sitting on this ask because I REALLY needed to think of an answer. The question of if he would have nightmares bounced around in my brain for a bit before it hit me that, YES, he WOULD. Why WOULDN’T he?

It lead me to having daydreams about him not sleeping well during the immediate aftermath of the finale/the few days where he doesn't have Peri as his Godparent. And OUGH... THEY'RE DELICIOUS. DALE THOUGHTS INCLUDED BELOW AS WELL.

ANOTHER part of why Dev doesn't show up to school for a few days? He's tired as FUCK. Cause he hasn't been able to sleep well, because he's had it lingering in his mind that he KILLED Peri. It's on his conscious no matter how much he tries to not think about it. AND WHAT'S WORSE IS THAT HE DOESN'T EVEN LEAVE HIS ROOM.

I mean, SURE, he would if his DAD wanted him to, but when would he? ...If he wants something. WHICH. OUGH. This gave me a spontaneous thought [literally JUST now] of Dale coming up to drag a very exhausted and emotional Dev out of his room... AND LIKE... IT MAKES HIM FEEL WORSE.

Cause... HELLO. DALE JUST BEING LIKE... "Go wash up and brush your hair of something. We have to keep up good appearances, you know! It's going to ruin my company's image with you looking like... *gestures.* THAT." AND... AND... OH MAN. RAGGHHH... THIS PROBABLY HAPPENS THE SAME DAY THAT DEV DOES HIS MINI FUNERAL... Ough. He's grieving and feeling guilty and... DHLSKDLSGDKZHZKZGZK

ANYWAY. SORRY. I WENT ON A TANGENT. DEV NIGHTMARES YES YES. HE HAS THOSE. I still have to think of the full extent/all the details, but BUT BUT... Peri exploding is absolutely part of them. Generally, that, and finale events, AND AND... the guilt creeps through into them too.

Even AFTER Peri shows back up as his Fairy Godparent, his guilt still lingers, for many reasons. You know, the fact that Peri is Wrong, the feelings he has towards Hazel/Cosmo and Wanda, OUGH... all of it. Nightmares filled with confetti and rainbows and him being all alone with nobody but himself and the ghost of the fairy he saw explode... WHEN YOU'RE A KID YOU CAN HAVE SOME REALLY FUCKED UP NIGHTMARES.

Someone BETTER give him a weighted blanket. And a teddy bear. AND like a million hugs... and a therapist.

[wambsgansshoelaces]

Turmoil; Chapter 1

Roman Roy x fem!Reader -read the rest here!

Prompt: slowburn romantic drama, arranged marriage plot line

a/n: thank you to anon for requesting! if you requested this fic, please tell me so I can tag you! I apologize if this reads as unrealistic or too dramatic- but please let me know your thoughts!

Word Count: 2.358k

Nothing. You’d turned yourself into something from nothing.

You’d ended up in New York on your own, running from your past, vying for a fresh start. With a degree from Harvard law in your pocket and an unsatiated hunger for success, it only took one case to change your fortune.

Your boss had pawned the case off on you because it seemed impossible. A man charged for real property fraud, and heaps of evidence to prove it. You initially thought you’d pawn the case off to some other schmuck, until you’d been given an anonymous tip and found a discrepancy in a bit of evidence that unraveled the opposition’s entire case.

It was a massive win- not just for you, but for your entire firm -and it came with a massive raise.

A few years later, you’d amassed an egregious amount of money in total and even more respect from those around you, so you quit and founded your own firm. You’re thankful for everything you have. You stay humble, you’re likable, and you make sure everyone in your employment is as well. It keeps you afloat- New York loves you, but more importantly, they trust you.

It earns you millions.

You’re happy with the life you lead. You frequent charity events, donating whenever you can, staying kind. You know what kindness can feel like during a period of misery. You remember what relief felt like when extended a hand, so you extend yours whenever you can.

You help the people around you. You’re kind to everyone, conduct yourself with grace, and are aware of yourself and those around you.

Maybe that’s why Logan Roy chose you.

He’d written to you a week ago, inviting you to dinner to discuss business prospects. You assume he’s gotten himself into a legal pickle involving some of his questionable activity which some regard as criminal.

When you enter the restaurant, one of his men spawn at your side and lead you into the dimly lit back where nobody is sitting. Your heels click on the marble, your gait not wavering.

“Mr. Roy,” you say when you see him. He gets up, albeit very slowly, and shakes your hand.

“Y/L/N in the flesh.” He sits back down and gestures to the seat across from him. You oblige. “You’ve made quite the name for yourself.”

“I do my best.”

He beckons over a passing waiter. “Get her whatever she wants. Put it on my tab.”

You quietly order a small appetizer and watch him watch you.

“Well, Mr. Roy, I hate beating around the bush. Why am I here?”

“The first case you worked on. Do you remember that man’s name? The one you proved innocent?”

“Connor Frost. I don’t forget. Never showed his face once.”

“About him. For witness protection and press reasons, we were allowed to alter his name in the official papers. We also got away with him never being there.”

Your heart misses a beat.

“Connor Roy was on trial for real property fraud, and you proved him innocent,” he continues. You school your face into neutrality. You get a sick feeling in your stomach that won’t stop growing and gnawing at you. It threatens to eat you inside out. “I hate to burst your bubble, but he was guilty. Fucking stupid, it was.”

You blink. “I don’t mean any disrespect, but-”

Logan’s eyes never leave yours. “But nothing. The deed you found in Connor’s name? Forged. And the people who forged it were paid more than enough to never think of speaking about it in court. You couldn’t have known it was fake, so you took it to trial and won. I practically bankrolled that raise of yours.” You can feel yourself begin to itch. “Initially, there was never any need to tell you. If I had things my way, I’d have let you live your life doing whatever the fuck you wanted. But my son had other plans.” As if he didn’t just reveal that your first case was a joke, he offers you some wine. You quickly decline. You feel like you’re going to puke all over him.

“Kendall. You know Kendall.” His voice drips with venom. “Would’ve given everything to him, but he obviously has different ideas for the company. I can’t let him take it now. He’ll fuck up everything I’ve worked for and put into place at Waystar. And I’m not giving the company to the idiot who accidentally committed fraud to the point of felony, or the one who’s running around the world with her dumb fucking political bullshit. That leaves me with one son. So the company has to go to him.”

Logan tops off his glass of wine. “But, by God’s grace, this leftover son is the fucking stupidest of them all.”

You have no idea how this has anything to do with you.

“Let me be clear, Miss Y/L/N. I respect you. You’re a fantastic attorney. I’d have you on retainer- I will, once my current contract with that Frederica jackass runs out. But you must forgive me for all of this. I have to do what needs to be done.”

He inhales, then sighs. “For you to take control without me losing public face, I want you and my son to come to an agreement in a partnership.”

You have to give him the dumbest fucking look for him to respond with, “Marry him. I need you to marry him.”

“I’m sorry?” You can barely keep your composure. You think you’re dreaming, or someone spiked your water, or you’re dead, or anything but this.

“I can’t have him in control. I can pretend like he is, sure, but I need someone with a brain at the helm.”

“I… my degree is in criminal law. I have no idea how the corporate, let alone financial world runs.” It’s all you can think of to say.

He waves you off. “You’ll learn.”

You don’t know what to say. You probably look like a fish, mouth hung open as you gape at him. “Surely someone else is better suited to this than me. I won’t. I can’t.”

“This is why I had to apologize,” he mutters. “Do as I say, and our secret is kept. Walk away, the tabloids will learn of a little lady who buried and forged evidence to win her first court case.”

“You can’t be serious. I thought it was real!”

“The public doesn’t know that. Regardless, I’ve done worse. I’ve ruined stronger, more powerful people with much less.”

You press your lips into a thin line. “I suppose you’ve left me with no choice,” you grit out.

Logan smiles and claps his hands together. “Welcome to the family.” Your appetizer finally comes and is set in front of you. You don’t feel that hungry anymore. “What are you waiting for? Eat!”

He takes a bit of calamari from you. “I think it goes without saying,” he says, “that if you say anything about this conversation we’ve had, you’ll end up prosecuted and in jail for fraud.”

☾𖤓

You feel like you could punch a hole into the wall. You can’t believe it. It’s pure dumb fucking luck that you got caught in this.

Logan Roy didn’t choose you for your legal prowess, or any of your skill or ability like you’d stupidly believed. He chose you because he has control over you, and he knows it.

A few days pass, and you begrudgingly drag yourself out of your rotting place in bed. Cursing yourself the entire time, you change into something nice. Logan told you he was throwing a party in your name, to introduce you to the family- and the inner circle, you knew.

If anything, you think to yourself, you look fucking good.

You’re not prepared for the onslaught of paparazzi that bombards you the moment you step out of the house.

That bastard must’ve told the press about your engagement.

There’s nothing you can do but get into the black sedan waiting for you at the bottom of your driveway. You’re probably going to have to move, now.

You sit in the backseat, simmering the entire drive. You have to prepare yourself for the hell that’ll be stiff arming paparazzi to get to the party.

When you pull up, you take a deep breath, and step out the car. The man sitting in the passenger seat got out before you and walks out in front of you, another flanking you as you push through the chaos.

The flashes are almost blinding, but you keep your eyes open. Every picture taken tonight is going to be circulated tenfold by not even tomorrow morning. You hope you have resting bitch face in all of them.

Your miniature guard manages to get you inside with no issues. You’re late on purpose, and it seems like the room goes quiet when you enter.

The crowd stares back at you as you survey them. As much as your rage is telling you to make a scene, you won’t. Time and place, you tell yourself.

Immediately, you can tell Connor recognizes you. He tries to avoid your gaze, but your rage bubbles up and out of you. “Mind if I steal him for chat?” you ask the girl standing with him, voice painfully faux-sweet. You feel like you’re on Love Island, in some sick, twisted way.

The girl gives Connor an awkward pat on the arm before leaving him be. You can feel peoples’ eyes burning into the back of your head.

“You told me,” you begin, voice dangerously low, “that you didn’t do it.”

He looks everywhere but at you. “I was just doing what I had to.”

“Was fucking me over what you had to do? Because I feel like that’s all you did,” you hiss.

“Do you really think someone like me is going to ever go to jail?” Connor scoffs. “It could damage my reputation.”

“It could damage my reputation,” you mock. “Are you fucking stupid? Fucking God.”

You turn to leave, but immediately pivot back. “You’re a Roy. You would’ve been bailed out immediately. You wouldn’t have even gone to jail for an hour.”

You’re fuming. You’re barely holding it together.

Then, you catch the eyes of a man not that much taller than you, dressed in all crisp black. He’s handsome, you think, a light stubble dotting his jaw and soft eyes that wrinkle gently when he smiles.

He excuses himself from the conversation he’s having to come to you and Connor.

“Connor. You’ve met my lovely bride-to-be?”

You’re back to fuming, any thoughts of his beauty gone.

He sticks his hand out to you. “Roman Roy. Nice to meet you, I’m your fiancé.” His voice is painfully bitter.

“You think I want this any more than you do?” you ask under your breath, your handshake way too firm. His grip on your hand is equally as tight.

Connor snorts. “At least act like you like each other.”

“You’re the reason any of this happened. Keep yourself out of it,” you snap.

Roman sighs and turns away from Connor. “Can we go for a walk? We should probably have a word.” To your dismay, you agree.

As soon as you’re out of the main atrium and by yourselves in a grand hallway, you speak freely. “Listen, this is nothing personal,” you begin, “but I’m looking for a way out of this.”

Roman looks over at you as you walk, both of you going at a snail’s pace. “I don’t stink, do I?” He sticks his hands in his pockets. “For what it’s worth, I’m sorry this happened to you. I know he’s blackmailing you.”

You sigh. “I should’ve known something was wrong with the case when I never saw my fucking client in person.”

“Well, I want this over as quickly as you do. My father doesn’t want me anywhere near the company, and I’d like to change that.” You both stop walking to face each other. Maybe you two can be friends, despite everything.

“Let me make something clear, though.” Roman takes a step towards you, leaning forward to whisper in your ear. “I’m only in this for me. Not you.”

Whatever positive thoughts you’d had were chased away. You spend the rest of the night fuming under your skin, lying through your teeth, and standing by yourself in the corner.

Siobhan Roy is the first to approach you.

“I admire you, you know.”

“Your father said that too, and look where I am now.”

She presses a flute of champagne into your hand. “I’m not my father.” You share a tense look. “Listen. I think we can do something good together,” she says lowly. “You want to disentangle yourself from this situation, and I want my father out of the picture when it comes to Waystar. Some of my clients have used your firm during political scandal. They all came away unscathed… I have full trust in your ability.”

“What do you want from me?”

“When the time comes,” Siobhan says, “I want you to help take my father to court. And put him down under. So to speak,” she adds. “And I’ll help make sure that if my father ever says anything about you, nobody believes it.”

After Siobhan, it’s Kendall.

“Shiv talked to you.” He’s worse at keeping conversation than she is. “I would also be involved in this. I’d take my dad’s place as CEO, Roman becomes COO.”

“I take him to court, I’m told.”

“Yeah. Yeah, you do, and you win,” he says carefully. “And then you get so much money you can run away to some foreign country and forget any of this happened.”

You regard him carefully. “How can I trust you? Or Siobhan? Or anyone in this fucking place?”

Kendall pauses, and takes a moment to think. “You can’t,” is all he says before leaving you standing on your own once again.

Finally, Roman makes his way back to you. You bristle as you watch him approach. “I know you don’t really like me right now, but I want to go home and I can’t leave without you on my arm. So, shall we?”

You roll your eyes, but take his elbow anyway.

[cuprohastes]

See strange new worlds... and go for a walk

So there you are, your little Xenobiological survey, and of course, your assigned Human, who's there to pick stuff up and do human-related things.

You've heard about these creatures. They're from some weird hell world where there are ice deserts on the poles, one of which has land under it, the other is apparently just a continental-sized block of ice, and then around the middle, it gets hot enough to make you re-read the report.

And these creatures apparently will happily live there and every 3 Tictar, the climate switches from cold enough to freeze water to warm enough to evaporate it all into enormous clouds which apparently build up a static charge and just float around randomly vaporizing stuff.

Wack.

And then one of your self-driving Sintral all terrain vehicles gets a little too much I in its AI and wanders off, of course with all the gear loaded up and... how do you even deal with that?

It's a wild planet. There are things out there, they have teeth! And Claws! you know -- You saw the human belly rubbing one of the predators, and you're kind of still wondering how that happened.

So now you need to go get the autonomous vehicle back, and of course you're taking the Human. You're a good runner, if anything large and hungry leaps out, your plan is to run faster than the human.

Everyone agrees that there's a 50% chance the Human will just outright murder it, 30% chance they'll hug it and ask it who's a good boy, and Xosh in Maint says there's a 5-10% chance they'll settle down and start a family. The other 10% you'd feel really guilty about.

What nobody told you is that this Human is going to show up with a truly massive pack strapped to it's back, and then proceed to walk. And Walk. And Walk.

There is no reason this thing should be able to do this. It just keeps walking. It's not even tired. It's got a ridiculous hat on and it's singing and it won't stop talking.

"It's been two [hours]!" you say. Walking for 2 hours on your world is considered pretty impressive.

The Human jsut shrugs and says "Yeah?" - but no it's been two [hours] - you're starting to stagger. You know you can run faster than this thing but apparently, if it wanted to it'd just keep strolling after you as you dashed away and then when you stopped to pant it'd just mosey on up.

You start to realise that this is why everyone's got anxiety about this thing turning feral. You can't run from it. It'd just keep coming after you. You couldn't sleep, or rest, it'd just keep coming like some horrific death snail.

And that's when you realise the Vehicle is hunting you. The tracks you're following curve and meet up with the tracks that have your hoofprints and the human's weird mutant leg-hand coverings. It's following you.

The human of course thinks this is fascinating.

You decide to go back but now the vehicle is in front of you, waiting. Horrified you realise it's watching you with LIDAR and SONAR, and Chu-Wave resonance.

You run. You drop everything and you run. Let the vehicle pick the slower target - If you can climb a rock, maybe you can hide. Maybe you can survive.

Your lungs are raw from panting, and you're trying to call the survey camp. You turn around and look down.

The human and the vehicle are facing off. The Human is... talking to it.

OK well that's weird.

Now the human is climbing in... Into a rogue AI vehicle? Will it even let them back out?

The vehicle trundles off, turns, comes back, and circles the rock, making slow, comfortable passes. It's tracking you.

The sun starts to sink and you realise that you're alone out here. Help is not coming.

Then the vehicle stops and the door opens. The Human hops out and just ambles up. Ho hum, just a normal day on a wild planet with a rogue AI and some sort of unceasing predator who seems to treat this all as jolly good fun.

"You can come down." they say. Because that would be the sane thing to do. Yes let's all stand in front of te very heavy, very fast possibly killer vehicle with the insane brain.

"We had a chat - The car, uh well it's got a name now, Herby, it just wanted to follow its programming to transport things. It's quite worried about you." the Human says.

Say what now?

"Yeah it uh, well it got bored I suppose because it wasn't being taken out. So it went to do a topological survey of places it'd never been. Once it realised we were following it kind of panicked because it knows you can't walk long distances comfortably, and it wants to uh... well drive you around so it'll feel better?"

This is way too much. You can barely move. Your muscles are full of anxiety toxins and quivering from over-use. You can barely move now.

The human climbs up the rock with ease, picks you up and puts you in the car. The air conditioning and filtering! Ah! No pleasure, no rapture, no exquisite sin greater... than Sintral Air!

And now the Human and the car are chatting to each other. Apparently, the agreement is to take the long way back, and a promise to go out more often. You're too tired to care.

You're more or less OK with this until the Human starts to teach the car to sing...

---

Because @marlynnofmany asked why there weren't any stories about humans being persistence predators for great justice, or AI vehicles that weren't evil and I thought "ooh writing prompt"l

[alicent-vi-britannia]

What was C.C.'s wish? And what kind of relationship does C.C. with Lelouch?

Today I'm going to get into swampy water because for the first time on this page I'm going to address CC's wish and I'm going to take her relationship with Lelouch very seriously. Lelouch and C.C.'s relationship is one of the most misunderstood in the series. Honestly, I think very few fans understand all the relationships in Code Geass. What sets Lelouch and CC apart is that their relationship is highly idealized for the wrong reasons. In other words, fans love the idea they have of Lelouch and CC's relationship, rather than what it is. This time I'm not going to talk about the headcanons of the shippers, I'm going to talk about the canon and in order not to go on too long, I'll limit myself to talking about the core of the relationship and to do so, I have to explain what C.C.'s wish is.

So what was C.C.'s true wish? She longed for love in its purest form. An unconditional love because deep down she wanted to be recognized as human and that is the cornerstone on which the relationship between Lelouch and C.C. is built. C.C.'s past shows us that she was dehumanized at an early age: by her condition as a slave that defined her as an inferior being before her masters, by the people on whom she used her Geass who reduced her to an object of desire, by the nun who used her as a tool for her own purposes and for the code that turned her into the Immortal Witch we know. This human degradation in combination with deep emotional deficiencies from childhood and the traumatic experiences we saw in episode 15 of R1 led to the development of low self-esteem and the appearance of suicidal tendencies.

C.C.'s death wish, in fact, is a manifestation that C.C. has no self-love. I have read some opinions that suggest that C.C. is self-deprecating, but I disagreed with them because C.C. didn't love herself long before she met the nun and beyond feeling guilty for giving Geass to Lelouch and the children of the Geass Cult, she never reproaches herself nor do we see her devalue herself as they have made other characters with themselves (Suzaku, Nina, Euphemia…). So I don't think she had an opinion of herself until she assumed her condition as selfish Immortal Witch (which is a stage in her life when she had morality removed from her). And you can't hate yourself if you didn't love yourself at some point.

It isn't so simple to see that C.C. has low self-esteem since her arc has a philosophical approach and in that sense it differs from Rolo's arc, which also starts from the theme of "love" and the thesis that "love humanizes you"; but the message reaches us much more directly because it doesn't have a sieve. C.C. justifies her suicidal plan by appealing to passive nihilism. "Life is absurd and has no meaning because there is no love, there is pain and if life has no end it means that the pain is eternal." Faced with this terrible conclusion, C.C. thinks it is better to take her own life. But death doesn't represent a solution. In reality, just as it is for Suzaku, death is an escape from the suffering that C.C. feels and, at the same time, it is a way of becoming aware of her humanity by recognizing the existence of death; because, as Martin's character said in the anime Monster, "nobody really wants to die."

This is one reason why C.C. refused to give her code to Charles at the last minute and didn't force Mao and Lelouch to take her code, preferring to abandon them. The other reason is that C.C. isn't so petty as to condemn them against their will to an immortal life since she felt affection for them and in turn, Lelouch and Mao wouldn't be able to take the code, knowing that C.C. wanted to end her life. The problem is that C.C. doesn't know what she wants and she has no idea what love is. She had no parents or friends. She only knew conceptually what love is, but Geass offered her a distorted vision of her wish and, as she herself said, she forgot what it is (and that's why it's ridiculous when CluClu fanboys deny C.C.'s words about her feelings for Lelouch, when she tells Kallen that she doesn't know if she loves him in episode 24 of R2, and insist on emphatically stating that C.C. was in love with Lelouch). Furthermore, she was so immersed in her own suffering that she couldn't realize that she already had what she always wanted.

Ironically, C.C. decided to cut connections for fear of suffering again and being despised. People tend to project themselves onto others and those who suffer from low self-esteem think that no one can love them because if they themselves can't do it, neither can others. Hence she distances herself emotionally from her contractors, how? Through contracts (it is C.C.'s favorite barrier). By defining her relationships strictly in contractual terms, she already creates a distance. In psychology, there is a term for it and it is "attachment." Broadly speaking, the relationship that an individual and his or her caregivers had in childhood will determine their relationships in adulthood. Clearly C.C. manifests an avoidant attachment. "Avoidant attachment is characterized by the tendency to avoid emotional intimacy and dependency in a relationship. People with this type of attachment tend to maintain emotional distance and may be reluctant to express their feelings. This may be due to past experiences of rejection , abandonment or emotional wounds that have led to the creation of an emotional shell as a protection mechanism."

Initially, Lelouch also dehumanized C.C. considering her an Immortal Witch. Like Clovis and Code R, he intended to study her is not until after he hears C.C. call her own name in her dreams in the cave in Narita that he begins to treat her like a human. That moment in the cave is important for both of them. On Lelouch's side, because C.C. enter the circle of his loved ones. And, on C.C.'s side, because Lelouch thus became the first person to treat her as a human. So the first emotional bonds are forged that become stronger as time goes by and thus we arrive at the favorite episode of CluClu fans: "C's World", from the second season.

Episode 15 of R2 is a sample that Lelouch really is a good person: even though he just discovered that C.C. used him to transfer a curse to him and that she was dishonest with him about her relationship with his father, Lelouch shows compassion and empathy for C.C. because he wants his loved ones to be happy (and he has seen C.C.'s unfortunate past recently). Therefore, he asks C.C. that she dies with a smile, which, at the same time, is a tight synthesis of Agathonism, which is the philosophy that refutes passive nihilism and whose maximum postulate is "enjoy life and help live a pleasant life." This noble request constitutes a turning point in the relationship between them since in this way the contract between partners of Lelouch and C.C. becomes a promise between two humans (words from the official Code Geass guide, not mine). Why? Because in that moment when Lelouch promises to make her smile, C.C. see his love. The Greeks divided love into several types and one of them is agape. Agape is the highest form of love and charity and essentially refers to unconditional love (in fact, Christians later adopted the term to precisely describe the love that God feels toward humanity). This is the love that Lelouch professes for C.C.

The following episodes only emphasize what it already demonstrated before. Even when C.C. lost her memory, even when her association with his enemy and her participation in the Ragnarök Connection came to light, even when she withheld pertinent information from him, even when she gave him the Geass that would change his life forever, even when Lelouch had to sacrifice himself to atone for his sins and bring peace to the world, Lelouch never held a grudge against C.C. On the contrary, he always treated her with kindness and offered her empathy and gratitude. In the end, Lelouch managed to save C.C. of her self-destruction by accepting her and recognizing her as his equal. This is what restores C.C.'s will to live and gives her the motivation she needs to find love and acceptance for herself.

In addition to the fact that Zero Requiem gives a new perspective to C.C. since not only does she witness Lelouch's love for humanity, she also sees Lelouch's persistence despite difficulties. And that, ladies and gentlemen, is being human. She understands then what it is to be human and what life means. It's about survival. And, similarly, C.C. understand what love is. It's about sacrifice. Thanks to Zero Requiem and Lelouch, C.C. finds meaning in life and is more than ready to embrace it and love. Thus Lelouch honored his promise to C.C. and it only remains for her to live and be happy as he desired.

Indeed, Larry. C.C. has a love story, not with Lelouch, but with herself and interpreting Lelouch and C.C.'s relationship. as a romantic relationship would strip away the powerful character of C.C.'s arc. and it would take away from the uniqueness of her relationship with Lelouch (which I confess I didn't find at all special at first, compared to Lelouch's other relationships that featured much more complex, nuanced, rich, and interesting dynamics and developments). Besides that's the point of their relationship. When C.C. tells Lelouch in episode 24 of R2 that he is not like any man she has ever known, she meant that she had met contractors and people who had hated and loved her, in what sense? Exactly like Mao. That's why the official Code Geass guide explicitly notes that Lelouch never saw her as his lover or mother. Therefore, if he had expressed romantic love or erotic love or filial love (storge is the Greek term), Lelouch wouldn't be different from Mao. He loved her in a way no one else had. And that is agape love. The one who only pursues the well-being of the other, putting it before his own, without expecting anything in return, even if that love isn't reciprocated, which has nothing to do with romantic love or sexual desire. In agape love there is no jealousy, envy, distrust, betrayal or anger towards the other for their failures or actions, because, simply, you love the person, accepting them as they are. That's the relationship Lelouch and C.C. have.

PS: enough of believing that self-esteem problems are solved thanks to romantic love, Julia. That only happens in novels of dubious quality.

[peaceofflights]

Falling in love with Wally Clark Would Include:

A/N: Currently working on another story, but I thought I’d put this up in the mean time. Set in the “What’s three years in eyes of eternity” universe <3

Rated T for drug use and cursing.

So falling in with Wally would include:

• Totally not being prepared to fall in love. So it takes you at least five years to even realize you have a crush… admitting it to no one.

•He fell first, but you fell harder.

• Constantly reminding the others that you and Wally are just friends, who of course platonically cuddle.

• Wally is in fact the best cuddler, it usually consists of you sitting on his lap and him wrapping his arms around you. You constantly insist that you’re too heavy and he laughs in your face.

•Holding hands wherever you go. You’re a hand holder, and Wally never gives up the opportunity to show you physical affection. If anyone says anything you let go and blush pretending not to notice. Wally then proceeds to get mad at them for bringing it up, since it means you stop for a few days.

• Trying to find the most clever insults for each other.

“Who do you think you are, Ferris Bueller?”

“Am I supposed to know who that is?”

• Using “He’s my shithead” as a justifiable response when Rhonda tries to tease you about the relationship.

• Every few weeks feeling guilty about insulting him too much and rambling about being a bad friend. Which of course always ends in hugs.

•You two do pretty much everything together from golf cart joy riding to playing mermaids in the pool.

•One time he tried to teach you how play football…it didn’t end well. He of course is the ultimate hype man, but you don’t really understand why you need exercise in the afterlife.

•In return you try to teach him how to tap dance, that is in fact wayyyy more fun. Mina might not be thrilled that you’re making so much noise in the theater, but she just had to get over it.

•In fact you invited the whole support group to watch his one man recital. He was a good sport about it, but nobody could stop laughing.

• He’s a good sport about most things, and is always happy to tag along with whatever you and Charlie are up to for the day, even if it’s not exactly what he’d want to do. That typically means spying in the men’s locker room.

•But when you aren’t together you catch yourself observing him from across the way. One time he caught you watching him run laps on the football field, your blush didn’t go away for weeks. To be fair though it was probably from his constant teasing;

“Hey stalker”

“So who we stalking today kid?”

“It’s okay, I know it’s because I’m irresistible”

• For some reason you aren’t bothered by the fact that he will forever smell like B.O. probably since you will always smell like sunscreen. In fact you almost forget until of course you remember, usually while stoned in the janitors closet.

“Babe, you smell baaaaaaaaaaaddddd.”

• But he doesn’t really care that you’re making fun of him because he loves your laugh, it’s his favorite part of you, even if you hate it. But then again, he pretty much loves every part of you.

•You too love every little thing about him… not that you’ll ever admit it.

[cuchufletapl]

Thinking thoughts, I've said before that Ed and Al should've gotten to cry into each other's arms when they got Al's body back, and I've just remembered a half-baked Twitter thread I wrote over a year ago that illustrates some of my reasoning, so I'm just gonna copy-paste it here:

FMA: On the Elric Brothers and Crying

Al can't cry and Ed won't. Ed tells Winry that he can't afford himself to cry until they get their bodies back, but I think a better way to put this is: Ed will refuse to cry until Al is able to.

Their mutual emotional constipation stems from their unwillingness to share their pain with each other. Their sense of self is wrapped around the results of the human transmutation. And I think a very neat way to illustrate this is through their respective relationships to crying.

Al can't physically cry and he can't show expression. His pain runs deep and scathing and isolating, and yet his very condition renders him unable to express it in any way that is not through his voice. In a way, he is like a robot with a soul. Fully aware of that which he cannot do that is so integral to the essence of humanity. It's no surprise that he would question his realness so easily when confronted by Barry. To some extent, he probably doesn't feel human anymore. To be clear, I'm not saying that expressing emotions in a conventional way is what makes us human. Al's dettachment from his sense of self also has to do with the fact that he's been put through five years of massive sense deprivation. He can't sleep, eat, smell, or feel touch. His physical inability to cry is just another fucked up thing in the list of fucked up things that being literally disembodied entails.

But here's the kicker: Al won't say any of this, he won't complain, because he understands that Ed already knows. He doesn't know the extent to which his brother feels guilty but he knows enough not to want to burden him further. And so he can't physicially cry and he won't express his pain in any other way either. It's his own to bear. Nobody would be able to fully understand it either.

Now Ed on the other hand: he carries the weight of the consequences of his idea on his flesh and he walks beside the hollow body that he had to force his little brother into. Where Al isolates his emotions as his own to carry, Ed considers himself the bearer for both of them. It's not that he's deluded himself into thinking that if he feels bad enough about it he can spare Al some suffering, but guilt shapes Ed's very self.

He's the older brother. Bringing mom back was his idea. Their pain is his to carry. The right to heal from that pain is his to earn too.

So he won't cry for as long as Al isn't able to let out his pain that way, too.

[aiyexayen]

aita meme shen yuan

AITA for not telling my new siblings that I'm not their real brother?

Look. Let's get something straight. I didn't ask for this.

I (???M) was living my previous life, in my prime, on my own, just minding my own business, and out of nowhere I get zapped into this fucking fantasy world. I wake up in a body that isn't mine, surrounded by strangers I've never met, with a computer voice in my head telling me how to act or else it will KILL me (again, I guess). Not hyperbole.

I figured it out, though. Who I am now, what I'm supposed to do to appease that damn computer system. Some of the characters--people, were pretty suspicious at first, and I had too many close calls for comfort, but it turns out I'm really good at posing, probably because the guy I'm posing as was the biggest poser around to begin with. Hah!

Now I'm practically immortal (not that I'm complaining about that) and I've got a mountain full of students to teach (that part's fine, too, I guess; they're good kids) and eleven other sibling-teachers bound together by sacred vows on adjacent mountain peaks at their own schools. Eleven. And none of them know that their real brother is dead.

It's not like I killed him myself! I don't know what happened to him at all! I just got stuck into his body! And he's the one who should feel bad, anyway--he was basically a villain! Scum of the earth! I had so much work to clean up after him and all the shitty things he did in his life just to make this place livable!! Fuck!!!

I'm a way better teacher than him and I'm not even qualified! I don't even like kids, either. I'm just not a complete monster. Nobody could be as bad as him.

Besides, he was a jerk to all of his siblings. None of them even liked him! Well, except for my oldest brother. I mean his oldest brother. He's way too nice and forgiving. WAY too nice. As in, I think he'd even forgive me for replacing his darling little brother and not telling him, if I confessed. Which I don't want to do! Why would I? I have everything I could want here to just quietly live and enjoy my life. Doting students and good food and cool abilities that came with the body. All the books I could read, all the music I could play. I get along so well with these brothers and sisters. And I'm so much better to them, too--like anyone would be. It's not like they'd want the scum brother back even if they knew I was an impostor this whole time. Probably.

There's no reason for me to feel guilty for not telling any of them! It's unscientific! I'm absolutely not the asshole here!

Right?

[yall-hate-kids-tourney]

Round 5 (main finals): Chara Dreemurr (Undertale) vs. Amane Momose (MILGRAM)

Propaganda below the cut

Chara Dreemurr (?):

They were constantly blamed for killing all of monster kind in the no mercy route, despite players choosing to go that route. People ignored that they sacrificed themselves to attempt to free the monsters from the underground.

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everyone wants to blame their own actions (genocide route) on chara, who is a literal child. i don’t know how to tell you this but you are the one playing the game. it’s about YOUR CHOICES. chara is there is punish you for that, you killed the only family that ever loved them! how could they not be upset at that! also if you don’t mind, here’s a good video essay on the subject 

Amane Momose (12):

Amane was voted guilty in the first trial so that she would acknowledge her guilt. It backfired, and now she’s considered a threat. Well, everyone is a threat, but nobody’s threat level has been as heavily discussed and debated as hers. Consider the next prisoner in line, Mikoto. He’s objectively more dangerous and cannot be restrained. He beat up the guard in trial 1, and he was able to hold his own when the other guilty prisoners were attacked. But a good incentive to forgive him is so that he will calm down. You know what? That’s a good incentive to forgive Amane too! But she *can* be restrained, so a good portion of the discussion went into how she should be voted guilty so she *will* be restrained and not a threat. Since her vote was a near 50/50, of course a good chunk of the voters expressed dissatisfaction with her forgiven verdict. Some are already planning to vote her guilty for trial 3, calling her a “lost cause”. She hasn’t even done any concrete harm yet. Hold the pitchforks until she actually causes harm, please? And what if she *was* voted guilty in trial 2? We’ve been warned that she will continue to deny our judgement. A second guilty verdict won’t make her better either, and then what? She’d be called a “lost cause” as well. There is no winning with her.

----

Where do I even start? So first of all she’s an cult child who was physically and mentally abused and tortured by her parents and then (presumably) murdered her mother after her mother killed a cat that she took care of.

Now everyone in Milgram is a murderer but when Amane came and her MV showed her murder and circumstance in an admittedly highly fictionalized depiction of it the audience decided to…repeat the cycle of abuse!

She was voted guilty for the main reason of “teaching her” and helping her “realize that she was abused.” I would like to note that this tough love approach is something her parents utilized against her. “We are only doing this to help you.”

So the audience replicates Amane’s abusers and repeats the cycle of abuse and that’s pretty shitty but it isn’t exactly “Fuck Em Kids” level.

And then Trial 2 happened. Cause Amane is bitter and angry and horrifically traumatized so she acts aggressive and hostile. Especially towards another prisoner.

Now, again, everyone here is a fucking murderer (of atleast could be constructed as one) These people being able to Harm is a core concept of this series.

Yet for some reason it feels like people treat Amane as a “delusional creepy kid who wants to kill people” which completly takes away the nuance of her character. She does have the capacity to harm! Everyone here does! She’s not Uniquly Dangerous! She just has a Reason to be Dangerous. A Reason we GAVE HER by REPEATING THE CYCLE OF ABUSE.

In short: In a series full of Murderers I’m honestly a bit pissed that the 12 year old abuse victim is the one who’s treated like the guy from American Pyscho.

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TL;DR: "We metavoted this abused, indoctrinated child guilty in trial 1, but it didn't work. Now she is a threat to three grown adults: one who is fully free and two whom she has been shown to get along with. Please metavote her guilty again so she will be restrained and unable to attack them, even though that means subjecting her to further psychological torture." Amane Momose is the youngest of ten murderers, prisoners of Milgram who are to be judged innocent (forgiven) or guilty (unforgiven). In the first interrogation (voice drama), she said that what she did was in line with her religion's doctrines. If we judged her the "wrong way", she said she will just deny the verdict. Combining the voice drama and music video, you could piece together that she was raised in a cult and abused, even though she is cheerful and downplays her pain. She never shows *who* she killed, only *why* she did. After the first day of her vote, she was 81% innocent, but this wouldn't last the whole three months. Many people voted her guilty so she would "see her sins", part of the practice commonly known as "metavoting". Her innocent percentage rapidly decreased, and she hit guilty in the last 15 days, finishing at 51% guilty. At the end of the first trial, Jackalope (who is something like a host) went over all the prisoners' verdicts and commented on the general reasoning. When he got to Amane, he *laughed* at the audience for voting that way to make her realize her sins. Trial 2 rolled around, and it was revealed that Amane's victim was her abuser. On day one, she was at 74% innocent. Seems like a cut-and-dry case now, right? Well... in the intermission, two of the prisoners (Fuuta and Mahiru) were badly beaten up and became reliant on the care of Shidou, a doctor. Amane became hostile to Shidou because what he was doing was against her beliefs. She visited all three of them on their birthdays to convince them to change their ways. She seems to be especially close to Fuuta, who is now murmuring about salvation. Guilty prisoners are psychologically tortured, forced to listen to voices that reject their beliefs. Fuuta and Mahiru both say that the mental strain is worse than their physical injuries. But Amane, who also looks worse for wear, was thrown under the bus because she isn't injured and is considered a physical threat to them (never mind that she gets along with them). She's considered a threat to Shidou, a grown man who is twice her size and fully free, while she is partially restricted by the long sleeves in her trial 2 uniform. She might indoctrinate Fuuta even though, in a prison of ten people and one guard, she's the only voice of her cult. Fortunately, she got a break. Her vote was falling at a similar rate to the first trial. But this time, it stabilized at 51% innocent, 12 days before the end of her vote. But there's no way this is over.