#i feel like itd be a HUGE moment (maybe RIGHT at the end) where shes finally separating herself from the narrative | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

baylardo · 7 months

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me type some of my Voyager episode ideas for Threshold AU chronologically,,, FOR FUN :)

BIG POST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i made it up to season 3 lmao 😂 ill try and do more sometime but i piddled out

s2e1 The '37s - amelia name drop idea, but no ones really thinking about it yet.

s2e4 Elogium - somewhere in here, kathryn confides in either Chakotay or Neelix about the name "Philippa" that Mark wanted to name a daughter if they ever had one. :) her and chakotay have that intimate little scene in her readyroom/quarters i think, and neelix is just on the fence about having children (until he isnt) and i think kathryn would maybe have a lil conversation with him about her and mark's plans for their future or something idk.

s2e7 Partriution - tom and neelix bonding, something something laying foundation for kid naming ideas that comes up later.

s2e15 Threshold - obviously where stuff goes down. some less obvious side notes i have on it are that the re-evolution happens between Threshold and Meld. kathryn and tom are aware of their children existing on the ship by Meld. also need to mention somewhere that i think Kes would be the one to suggest they use "Edward" for the boy's name, she tends to suggest the names of her relatives to the doctor, i think she'd just kinda one track mind it haha. and maybe neelix or tom would stink "Owen" 'cause Tom hasnt worked through his daddy issues yet. the more i've sat on the naming process ideas the less i like chakotay, tom, AND kathryn being involved in it lol. i dont think amelia would be an obvious choice to chakotay. MAYBE he's the one to suggest philippa if kathryn did tell him about the name's significance to her (or neelix). its not super important but its something i ruminate on. babies end up getting situated in chakotay's quarters. neelix and kes (mostly neelix) do a lot of the babysitting while the babies' parents are on the bridge. oh i guess also like, its REALLY conveniently in a scene showing that the spy on voyager is in contact with the kazon -> seska. so they're like, vaguely aware at this point of how the warp 10 experiment went,, probably are aware of the triplets being kathryn and tom’s. kathryn and tom are avoidant of their children. tom for his mentioned daddy issues, afraid he'll mess them up, doesnt know how to parent, doesnt want to, etc. kathryn has this huge complex about being unfaithful to mark and that being so visibly apparent to her with these children, ummmm i think shed also beat herself up about being the first to have children on voyager, what her crew must think of her, etc. (before naomi is even born!!! IDIOT) aside from her struggles with her appearance too like yikes girl, visible failure moment. ALSO i think deep down shed know (and even said in the ep) that she was the one initiating things down on the planet and that she wanted children and everything so shes gotta grapple with this act she somewhat knowingly performed and got a clutch of eggs out of haha. oh my gosh ALSO!!!! idk where to mention this but i REALLY dont think belanna would be that involved with the triplets like, all that much if ever especially in earlier seasons. doesnt really seem all that interested, you like, never see her interact with naomi (yes itd be cute but weird that it doesnt happen all too often if at all i cant think of any times rn). like her daddy issues are mad buried and tom's not interested, theyre not even dating yet!!! YES in later seasons i think shed dabble in it just as tom is, and maybe she even pushes him to because of how uninvolved her parents are! but as of right now shes like nty about it haha.

s2e16 Meld - conveniently you dont see kathryn on the bridge in this episode, only her senior officers are seen visiting her in like her readyroom and sickbay and stuff. she's avoiding the bridge for a bit post-Threshold because shes feeling a little insecure about things and hates the looks her crew gives her. but mean!tuvok in this ep does not pull punches and i think hed berate her on like, her avoidance of the bridge or w/e. maybe say the warp 10 experiment was a bad call and she signed off on it idk, she feels really vulnerable afterwords but its an ugly truth thing for her that gets her to overcome her trepidations.

s2e17 Dreadnought - its still early post-Threshold and kathryn's 100% okay with blowing up the ship to save lives and doesnt really consider her children at all.

s2e18 Death Wish - the first time Q tries to tempt kathryn with turning her human again. :) establishing Q being into kathryn while in her hyperevolved state.

s2e20 Investigations - tom has his arc of being sassy with chakotay and overall a bad crew member. add onto it with the au that he and kathryn are both avoiding the children like a plague and leaving chakotay to take care of them. really funny that i think tom walks in late to his shift and bragging/lying about delivering Sam's baby like YEOWCH salt in the wound for chakotay he sure wasnt that ecstatic about his own kids. MAYBE theyre sleeping with each other to relieve lizard tension. chakotay's not vibing this situation at all. so understandably the two boys are a BIT on edge with each other for a surplus of reasons both fake and real. seska gets to see hyperevolved TOM for the first time in this ep but not kathryn!!!!! like to think him and seska would have a little quip about being lizards lol.

s2e21 Deadlock - just another early post-Threshold scenario where Kathryn's not really lingering on her children being part of the equation still. naomi is born in this ep, thats something haha. this might be an ep where she starts to linger on it though, feels somewhat guilty for neglecting them. maybe her and her other self would talk about it before one of them dies.

s2e25 Resolutions - forced exposure therapy for kathryn!!!!! learns while on New Earth that she likes bugs. Unfortunate <3 she also discovers she has an instinctive fondness for heat; she keeps slinking into chakotay's bed to snuggle up against him for warmth, wakes up next to him its real awkward, both choose not to read into it in the beginning but hahaha im trash for bed scenes like that where chakotay stirs to leave and kathryn would squeeze him tighter or something so hell stay with her. ummmmm i think her and chakotay would argue a lot about the kids for a while, then after the storm she kinda changes her tune and FINALLY gets more involved with them. had a side plot idea that Ed gets sick and kathryn gets REALLY frantic about it, like as its happening and his fever's getting worse shes begging whatever deities will listen that shell change and do better for these children if they let him live IDK HAHA.

s2e26/s3e1 Basics - seska gets to see threshold!kathryn here for the first time and she can BULLY HER about it. >:) i wanna dabble with these eps like, THOROUGHLY and i really havent yet, but i think seska would get a little booty injured about chakotay choosing kathryn's weird lizard offspring over his own son. SPEAKING OF SON i love the kolopak stuff about fatherhood it compliments the AU SOOOOO MUCH bc kolopak's like talking about the illegitimate children of a tribe being taken in despite their heritage JUST LIKE HIM!!!!!!! like chakotay could easily be talking to kolopak about his struggles with caring for these three infants that arent even his or something. maybe its vague haha. but inbetween Resolutions and Basics, kathryn's DEFINITELY pulled back on all that growth she did, like its a little different, but chakotay's frustrated about what to do. ALSO minor thing, but kathryn gets to eat weird eggs and bugs in this ep for survival and gets to make her crew do it too and i think that's awesome. :) also tiny note that the planet they get stranded on is hot and dry and i think kathryn and tom and babies would struggle with that so i think she'd be grouchy.

s3e8/s3e9 Future's End - just have to start that this ep has its opening with janeway as her like practicing tennis in her room and saying she's out of practice and 5000% AU associate her rusty skills with having a tail. :) canon compliance kinda necessitates these episodes have kathryn and tom look like, normal human. :/ the AU has to compliment proposed/used/failed solutions down the line in episodes as they organically occur like Ashes to Ashes where that's their FIRST time testing something to try and make Lyndsay Ballard look human, which to me means they wouldnt have attempted it prior to that episode and its waaaay in season 6. theres potential like, temporary disguise/genetic alteration ideas too like what they do with neelix and chakotay in some episodes, but i dont think theyd be able to do anything about hiding their tails! and these are the eps where the holographic emitter is ESTABLISHED so they dont even have that haha. the solution that seemed the EASIEST to me is like, some technobabble explanation accompanied by the weird time travel shenanigans voyager experiences in these episodes causing their genes to revert BACKWARDS just like they do in time. :) so theyre like, legit back to normal for a bit. but the triplets remain unaffected because they were born that way. i think building up to these eps, kathryn's like DABBLING in parenting but kinda noncommittal. this is also around the time that the triplets would start i think likeee talking or walking? put a pin in it i guess lol. kathryn and tom are hyped to look like themselves again, maybe act a little overindulgent on earth, being able to not stand out and get weird looks and all that. was thinking maybe the babies dont recognize her when she looks normal and a part of her feels sad about it. eventually they turn back when they return to their own time.

s3e11 The Q and the Grey - Q being infatuated with the only hyperevolved lady in existence real? i dont have some of the important details and ideas figured out in this ep, only that i can have fun with kathryn getting turned human and chakotay getting hyperevolved for a time. :) was thinking that when Q takes janeway to the continuum, that's when she gets forcefully turned human, i think she'd decline if he tried bribing her again. subsequently ms. Q feels a little threatened by janeway and she agrees to work with chakotay to help win Q back. i think the idea i'd had was that she'd hyperevolve chakotay to try and get janeway interested in him and not Q but idk if i like that idea. or she just does it for giggles. ANYWAY janeway at this point is kinda over it in regards to getting turned human again, it doesnt work. i think she'd assure chakotay that he doesnt need to change for her. :)

s3e12 Macrocosm - liked the idea of kathryn being alone but finding philippa uninfected and crying somewhere in a jeffries tube or something so she has to carry the baby around while she saves the ship.

#threshold au #next was Coda lol

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tteokdoroki · 4 years

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hi!! saw your requests were open, can i ask hcs for todoroki, hawks, bakugou and tamaki with a touchy drama queen fem!reader who they have a crush on? (separate)

— touchy-feely | bnha crush headcanons.

⇝ pairing(s): katsuki bakugou, shoto todorki, tamaki amajiki, keigo takami x fem!reader

⇝ rating: suitable for all.

⇝ genre: fluff.

⇝ warning(s): please read ! loads of fluff ?? and some cursing.

⇝ author’s note(s): thank you so much for this request lovely! it was actually my first so i hope i was able to do it justice for you ( sorry they’re kinda long) !! also thank you for 300+ followers :( i adore you so much <3

⇝ masterlist | requests

ok so, we all know that baku despite his bark bark grrrr aggressive nature is really just a sucker for cuddles and shit.

he loves that he lives for it!!

probably cos he never really got many hugs in his childhood ?? idk

so naturally with him having a crush on you all he really wants is for your attention to be on him

All The Time.

again going back to baby bakugou he probably has some kinda thing for praise an attention because everyone praised his quirk when he was younger.

but since he’s stubborn he’ll try to reject your touch most of the time and act like he doesn’t enjoy it when in reality he does.

he tries to hide the angry pink on his cheeks when you ruffle his hair in front of class or when you squeeze his booty on the walk back to dorms.

it’s your daily routine to wake him up with a pick up line during breakfast, some of your classmates think it’s over the top but you like how boom boom boy blushes.

katsuki’s favourite is when you lean your head on his shoulder during class movie night 🥺

he pretends that your hands aren’t intertwined under the blankets too

bakugou enjoys these moments the most it’s like you’re both calm around one another ??

kirishima and kaminari always tease him about it which makes bakugou wanna push you away.

A MISTAKE !!!

being the drama queen that you are you’d probably turn on the fake tears, get those water works RUNNING to the point where poor katsuki is all flustered and doesn’t know what to do.

“QUIT YOUR CRYING YOU FUCKIN DUMBASS”

“DO YOU NOT LIKE CUDDLING WITH ME KATSUKI?? IS THAT IT??”

poor bby just wants reach out and Hold you.

also wants you to shut the fuck up.

will probably grab your hand and yank you into his room for a cuddle session. “stop your crying, shitty girl. it’s giving me a damn headache.”

overall bakugou would probably be very flustered by your random dramatic personality but would get used to your displays of affection over time.

he doesn’t really think much of how dramatic you are.

at least you don’t yell at him like bakugou does.

todo is probably more worried about you than anything ?? because you go from 0-100 in a matter of minutes and that confuses him.

he’s also confused by the butterflies in his liddol tummy when you squish his cheeks and call him a pretty boy before anyone’s settled in for class.

like ??? why do you insist on pointing that out EVERY DAY

:( please tell him he’s pretty bc he doesn’t think it’s true

it doesn’t show but every time you wrap your arms around him to give an overly dramatic detailed account of how beautiful and talented shoto todoroki is he literally short circuits inside his brain

WHY DO YOU KEEP PRAISING HIM!!!

pls don’t stop bc poor baby missed out on all these good feelings.

maybe one of the main reasons you do it :(

todoroki starts attempting to ?? get touchy with you back ??

he knows that he’s fond of you but probably has never experienced a crush before so he doesn’t know if he should return these gestures.

you make it a daily habit to kiss shoto on the cheek and tell him how dashingly handsome he looks while reciting some kinda shakespeare poetry

he decides to ask natsuou what’s going on

Bad Bad Idea

big bro todoroki is like “this girl?? she’s in love With You?? you gotta confess to her right back!!!”

shoto: what is love?

so the next day in class you’re heading straight for the dual haired boy and he is Ready He Has a Plan

before you even reach him he’s grabbing your cheeks and pressing a KISS right on your lips.

“i think you’re very pretty too, miss ln.”

?:&/@-@/9&:

the whole class Freezes ??

and you being the drama queen that you are COLLAPSE in front of everyone because THE shoto todoroki just kissed you.

bby doesn’t even know what he did 🥺

probably ends with you two confessing to one another in recovery girls office.

you make a mental note to thank natsu later.

FJDJDJD here comes the big DUMB bird brain.

we all know that keigo is literally the biggest drama queen out there. he’s a pretty bird and he basks in attention no matter who it’s coming from.

you’d be similarly matched in personality so maybe that’s why he started to fall for you so hard and so fast.

i think you’d both be very touchy with one another, as part of your friendship.

whether that helping the bird with his eyeliner, touching at his stubbled chin to keep his face still or him pretending to peck at you by nibbling on your cheeks and shoulders.

you even squawk back at him!!!

keigo is very touch starved so i think he’d just like always having your hands on him and vice versa

sometimes he’ll do stuff to make you overreact like steal food from your plate when you guys have take out together

or bump into you on patrol

you’ll do either one of two things;

A) scream at him through laughter obnoxiously loud

B) ruffle his feathers a bit and play with his big boy wings.

usually it’s both

“stop laughing at me >:(“

you literally burst into fits of giggles when keigos wings puff up because of how flustered he IS

and of course for that dramatic flare you add some tears of joy.

kei loves how tight you hold him when he takes you for a fly even if you’re spouting a bunch of nonsense about how he’s gonna drop you and how you’re going to die.

probably drops you on purpose to see how you’d react.

when you land he laughs at how you kiss the ground and hug it mumbling something about how “i thought i’d never see you again,”

kei has to hold your hand while you get used to being on solid ground again.

adores the weight of your palm in his.

out of all the boys i think keigo would be the least shocked by your personality and your affections

it all kinda feels normal to him and that’s why he has a major crush on you.

BOY!!!

okay so this little bean has probably had a crush on you for like his whole life idk maybe you were childhood friends.

but then y’all met mirio and he thought that he’d never stand a chance.

pls your hints would go SO SO over his head.

you are Loud so very loud which contrasts with tama’s quiet and shy personality. so in his mind itd make sense for you to fall for mirio instead of him.

so he pushes his feelings for you deeep deep down.

you’re a naturally affectionate person, maybe a little overly affectionate but that just comes with your extremely over the top personality.

but around tamaki, it’s like your affinity for touching people increases by a tenfold.

you’re always clinging into him :(( despite the red tips to his elvin ears and you always smother his face with little kisses whenever you greet him.

of course tamaki loves your attention, no matter how shy it makes him— you’ve always got your hands on him and that makes him feel better.

it makes him feel like he has a chance with you.

the way you bounce up to him every day with a huge smile on your face just makes him Fall For You.

but tama struggles to see the good in himself and always compares the way you act around him to mirio.

baby over thinks :(

one day he’s hanging out with mirio and the blonde kinda goes “when are you gonna ask out yn?”

???? CONFUSED LITTLE ELF BOY

“she likes you, didn’t you know that?”

starts to return your affections a bit more n loves how excited you are when he holds your hand back !!

“EVERYONE TAMAKI AMAJIKI IS HOLDING MY HAND I REPEAT HES HOLDING MY HAND!!”

your feelings for one another go unspoken but he feels better now that he knows you like him and him only.

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toothpastecanyon · 4 years

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Dreams That Walk, Nightmares That Talk - Chapter 5

Huge thanks to @feferipeixes for editing this chapter! :DDD

Ben's been visiting the Mindscape every day since he was born. Once he brought something back, and twenty years later, Marie García is still picking out the pieces.

See most updated version on Archive of Our Own.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Hi Ben thank you very much much much everything is fine!

Marie frowns down at her phone. No, no, that sounds fake. She deletes that text… then she taps A and then she deletes that and then she taps A and then she deletes that and then-

“This your house, ma’am?”

“Wha-?” Her head snaps up. “My house? Oh, yes, that’s my house! Thank you!”

The taxi driver gives a nod as he pulls into her driveway. After a moment’s hesitation, she turns off her phone, stuffs it in her pocket, and then unzips her purse.

“Okay, how much do I owe you?”

______________________________________________________________

Hi bhubhubhuBen! It was very nice to see you yesterday! I had a great timeeeqweeeeqwe yesterday and your apartment looks great! I hope to see you soon but

Marie squints down at her phone screen. The screen glare hurts her eyes, and she takes a second to bury her face into a pillow. It’s nice and dark and comfy here… too comfy, way too comfy to think.

She groans, heaves her head back up, and keeps typing with eyelids that refuse to stay open.

I don’t know if I can see you this weekend, everything is fine but I’m not feeling up to it so hopefully I will soon maybe this weekend. Love you very much and

“You still awake, mi cielito?”

please dont wory

about

______________________________________________________________

A coffee table. A cup of tea. A ray of faint moonlight trickling over the carpet, and a phone whose time reads 3:00 AM.

A deep breath in, and out, and then:

Hey, Ben! Yeah, I had a wonderful time at your new apartment! It’s a lovely place, and it seems like you’re already pretty settled in. Hope the unpacking is going well :)

I’m a little busy with work this weekend, but maybe next weekend I will

Marie pauses. Frowns.

I will be better.

She makes a face, and then deletes it. Deletes a bit more than she needs to - whoops.

I’m a little busy with work this week end

(Make it right)

I’m a little busy with work this weekend weekend

I’m a little busy with work this weekend weekend weekend

I’m a little busy with work this weekend weekend weekend weekend

I’m a little busy with work this weekend I’m a little busy with work this weekend I’m a little busy with work this weekendzdtzdtzzdtzdtzdtdzdtzdtzdtdzdstrgcfdtsrtedffg

Marie scowls and turns off her phone in frustration. She picks up her tea, and looks out at the moonlit yard as she sips it, at the empty chairs on the porch giving off a ghostly glow.

She sips it, pointedly ignoring the twitchy thoughts in her head, the flickers of a man in her periphery… and the red glow of her wards that hint at a certain presence, a real one her mind hasn’t made up.

She can ignore him, but she can’t help but grimace as the silence stretches. After a couple minutes, she picks up her phone and heads back into the privacy of her bedroom.

______________________________________________________________

Hey, Ben! Monday was great, I meant to text you yesterday but I was a little busy, sorry about

Fuck. Marie turns her head to the side, and glares at the sunlight glowing behind her bedroom blinds as she thinks.

sorry about sorry about sorry about but I have lots of time today and that’s good. That’s

I have a spare moment today to

I was a little busy, I think I’ll keep being busy this weekend so just don’t worry about me. Go live your life. I just want you to be happy, so don’t go asking Alcor about me or trying to make me feel better by making plans. Don’t worry about me, I just don’t want you to worry about me and I’m sorry if

I don’t know how to I wish you could just do that, because I know you do and I’m just the wrong person to worry about. I’m sorry I can never be better for you. I’m sorry it always ends up like this. I’m sorry.

With a lump in her throat, she deletes the whole message.

______________________________________________________________

Hey, Ben, I know it’s been a few days. I really don’t want you to worry, okay? I’m not worth worrying about, all I do is lie around and

______________________________________________________________

Hey, Ben, thank you for trying. Thank you so much. You’re amazing and I don’t deserve you. Just live your life, okay? Please don’t worry about me. All I do is hurt you and let you down and youd be better off without me. I just wish you didn’t care so much, because I know you’d be hurt if I went, but itd be so much better for you, but I don’t want to hurt you like that. I just don’t know what to do and everything feels like the wrong thing to do and I don’t know.

You’d hate me if I sent you this.

______________________________________________________________

Hey, Ben!

Marie sits in a waiting room, surrounded by other people with all their sniffings and whisperings and foot tappings. When she looks up, she meets the eyes of some lady sitting across from her. They exchange quick, awkward smiles, then she looks down again.

Just wanted to let you know I have seen this message. Didn’t mean to leave you hanging, I’ve been super busy and I’m literally just sending this while I’m waiting for a doctor’s appointment. Hope everything’s well with you!

She makes a face. Deletes the last sentence, because that sounds weird.

Hope you’re doing well

Hope you haven’t been worried

Hope you

Hope-

“Uh, Marie Garcia? Is there a Mrs Marie Garcia here?”

Marie jumps up at her name. “That’s me! That’s me.”

(thats me thats me thatsme-)

She skips up to the nurse, and he holds the door open for her.

“Alright. We’ll do a little checkup, then I’ll let Dr Scythan know you’re ready.”

She knew the drill. Take her handbag off, step on the scales, grimace as she barely breaks a hundred pounds - yeah, she should… eat things.

Step off the scales.

(step on them again)

Walk away.

(MAKE IT RIGHT STEP ON THEM AGAIN)

Be led into a room. Sit down, watch him strap on the blood pressure cuff. Move it up a little, because he didn’t do it quite right.

A beep, and the cuff starts to squeeze.

Squeezes.

“How’s your day today?”

Squeezes.

Lets go.

“Hello?”

Marie blinks. “Huh?”

“Heh, were you zoning out?” The nurse chuckles as he writes the reading down. “130 over 80… I was just asking how your day was going.”

“Oh.” Marie makes a face. “It’s fine, I guess.”

(MAKE IT RIGHT MAKE IT RIGHT-)

“Good to hear, good to hear.” He stands up, and walks past Santino to the door. “Well, I’ll go let her know you’re ready now. Have a good one!”

Marie stares at where Santino was, then looks up at the security camera. She gives it a nervous smile, taps her fingers one two three against the table, then digs her phone out of her pocket and turns it on.

The text from Ben again. She rubs her eyes, sighs deeply, and deletes her whole response. She’ll… figure it out. Later.

Hopefully.

The door opens.

“Hello?” Dr Schythan pokes her head in, and smiles when she sees Marie. “Oh, hi! There you are - heh, I’ve been moving rooms all day. My main office is getting a little renovation, and…”

She chats away as she sits down and opened her laptop. A spare pencil rolls out of her folders; Marie catches it, and straightens it. Straightens it again. Smiles and nods and laughs politely.

“...So, how’s it been going for you?”

“Haha, yeah.”

“Marie?”

She blinked.

“How’s it been going since we last met up?” The doctor taps her mouse. “We said we were going to up your dosage to help with your anxiety… how’s that going?”

“Oh…” Marie tries not to glance at the flickering to her right. “Uh, I haven’t really…”

(straighten the pencil MAKE IT RIGHT)

“I don’t…” She straightens the pencil again, then looks up at the doctor. Crumples her mouth into a smile. “I’m sorry. What, uh, what did you say again? Sorry. Srry.”

Dr Scythan shakes her head. “No, no, don’t worry. How are you feeling now that we upped your dosage? Are you sleeping better now?”

Marie can't help but snort at that. The doctor gives a wry smile.

“I’ll take that for a no. Alright, we can-”

“It wasn’t because of the medication, though!”

“Oh?”

Marie thinks back to that night with Alcor, and the stars on the carpet, and her mouth seals shut. Shit, she thinks, demon things. She can’t say.

“You alright, Marie?” The doctor leans forwards. “Did something happen?”

She just shrugs. Her smile wobbles.

“Did you… take it as prescribed?”

“Yeah.”

“Once in the morning and-”

“Yeah. Yeah… yeah.” Marie hesitates, and then leans forwards. “Can I, um, ask you something?”

“Of course.”

“I-I mean, can I ask you something, and you’ll just answer it?”

Dr Scythan’s expression has turned carefully neutral. “Of course.”

“No! Like, I’m not crazy.” A flicker makes her grimace. “Not about this, at least. So even if it sounds crazy, it’s not crazy, okay?”

“Okay.”

Her expression still isn’t giving Marie much confidence, but she takes a breath. “Okay. Okay okay okay… okay. Um, can someone have more than one soul? In them.”

Dr Scythan’s eyebrows rise a little, but otherwise she hides her surprise well. “No. Not in any case that I’m aware of.”

“Okay, but what if they were little bits of souls?”

“Little bits of souls?”

She nods quickly. “Like lots of little bits of souls, they’re this big. Has that ever happened to anybody?”

“Um, no, I’m not aware of any case where that has occurred.” The doctor taps her laptop. “What prompted you to ask?”

“Don’t start writing stuff down, that’s not…” She trails off, and groans. “Okay, whatever. Forget I asked.”

“Are you sure? We can explore why you might be feeling this-”

“I’m not crazy!” Marie slams her arms down on the table. The pencil jumps, and she jumps back with it. “Sorry. I’m not… I’m not crazy.”

There’s a tapping sound as Dr Scythan types something in her laptop. She then turns to smile politely at Marie, who doesn’t meet her eyes.

“Alright, so about your medication. If it’s okay with you, we’re, uh, gonna pivot away from what we’ve been trying and see if we can’t find something more helpful…”

Marie narrows her eyes at the flickering in her periphery. She straightens the pencil, and tries her best to listen along.

______________________________________________________________

The wards go red when Marie gets in the car. Of all the things that happened today, this is the last straw; she rolls her eyes, throws her stuff in the back, shuts all the doors, and lets out a deep, deep sigh.

She lets it out, and then:

“Why are you still following me around?”

She watches the wards flare up, as if he jumped in surprise. She starts the car.

“Alcor. Why are you still following me around?” Gear shift. She reverses. “If you don’t want to tell me, you can at least leave me alone.”

As she drives down the parking lot, a dark figure comes into existence in the shotgun seat, head hung low like a scolded child. She waits for him to mumble out something.

“What was that?”

“I’m sorry.” He looks down, away. “About… last time we-”

“It’s fine.” She turns the wheel sharply. “Forget about it.”

Alcor shrinks back a little. “Oh, okay…”

With another eyeroll, Marie turns onto the main road. They ride in silence for a little while, until she stops at a light and glances over at him.

“Was that all you wanted to say? Sorry?” When he doesn’t respond, she looks back to the light. “Because you’ve been following me around for days, and-”

“I was making sure you were okay.”

“Oh, great.” She grips her steering wheel. “He sent you over again, huh.”

“No, no, Ben didn’t-! Ben didn’t send me, I just told him you were fine, l-like you wanted me to!”

“Uh huh. And what did he say?”

“Well, not much.” Alcor fiddles with his claws as they start moving again. “He said thank you, but I don’t think he really believed me… I’m sorry.”

At that, Marie sighs. “Don’t worry about it. Ben, he’s… hard to fool.”

“You can say that again.”

She gives a wry smile to that, but doesn’t laugh. They drive on for a little while, and she keeps her eyes on the road, ignoring the flickers in the edge of her vision. Now is not the time to get distracted.

“No,” Alcor starts again, quietly. “It was just me.”

“Just you for what?”

“Just me who wanted to see if you were okay.”

“Why?” Marie raises an eyebrow. “Because you want to poke around inside my head?”

“No! Just- nevermind. Forget it. I’m sorry.” They’re pulling into the driveway, and Alcor turns away. “I’m sorry, I’ll just go. I’ll leave you alone.”

She doesn’t reply. She turns off the car, looks down at the wards on her dashboard, and watches them drop off from burning red to cooling orange; it slowly turns green as Alcor’s residual energy fades. The car’s already heating up since the AC shut down, and she takes a deep breath of hot air.

There’s a flicker in the corner of her eye, and she lets it out in a deep sigh.

No people. No things to do. Marie thinks of texting Ben, but the thought of it twists her stomach into knots. Everything feels twisted; her brain feels fired up, her body feels both like it wants to do something and like it’ll never move again. It’s like she’s trapped in her own skin, and she just wants to sleep it away but she can’t, she can’t…

shecant

(not three you paused thats two and one NOT TWO)

shecantshecantshecant

(six NOT SIX)

shecantshecantshecant

(two one six three MAKE IT RIGHT MAKE IT RIGHT MAKE IT RIGHT)

Marie squeezes her eyes shut, and just sits there in the heat. Oh, god (ohgod ohgod), this is not going to be a good day. She doesn’t know what she’s going to do, she thought today’s session would help but it didn’t and now it’s going to be this for the rest of the day and she… she can’t do this.

A lump in her throat forms when that thought comes up. If she can’t do this, what is she going to do? Where does she even go from here?

(go go go)

Marie feels her mind latch onto that, and she doesn’t like where it leads her.

(go from here go from here go from here)

Not because it feels scary, but

because it feels

almost

sensible.

like what kind of life is this? what has she even been doing for her life has she even gotten better no shes in the same damn place no matter where she goes no matter who she asks nobody can help nobody can ever help and besides nobody would really miss you-

Flickers tapping on her glass. Grits her teeth, feels sweat bead on forehead.

“I can’t be alone right now.”

Words, spoken out loud. Marie feels the sweat pooling down her back, and she sits up, abruptly. Puts her key in the ignition, pretends to turn one two then actually on three.

The car starts up, and cool air blows in on her face. She sits there for a second, feeling the heat go down, staring at the green wards on her dashboard.

And finally, she sighs. Grits her teeth. Opens her mouth.

“Alcor?”

The wards immediately flicker back to red. Marie waits for him to appear, but he doesn’t. She groans.

“Alcor. Please come out.”

He comes back into existence next to her without making a sound. She tries to look over, but her eyes don’t quite rise enough to meet his.

“Hey, uh, Alcor. Sorry, I… I just wanted to…” She runs her hands down her face. “...Do you want to have some tea, o-or something. If you’re not busy.”

“You’re offering me tea?”

“And we could, I dunno, play some games or something. If you’re not busy. I have some board games. If you’re not busy.”

“Huh?” Alcor looks confused. “You want me to like, hang out? I thought you wanted-”

“Look, I don’t know what I want, okay? Just take it or leave it. I don’t care.”

“Oh. O-oh, okay…”

Marie watches him shrink back, and purses her lips. “Sorry. I meant to offer. I didn’t mean to yell at you.”

“That’s okay.”

“It’s not.” Her mouth twists into a grin. “I’m not very good at this.”

“Heh… me neither.”

“No?” Marie looks up at his glowing golden eyes, and blinks. “Oh, yeah, duh. You’re a demon.”

He nods at that, his wings awkwardly twitching. “Yup… that’s… that’s true. I am a demon.”

“Yeah…”

The conversation peters out there. After a weird moment of silence, the two of them share an uncomfortable laugh. Marie clears her throat.

“So, uh, tea?”

“Tea sounds good! Let’s go inside.”

He immediately jumps out of the car, and Marie turns off the engine. She sees him heading inside, and quickly taps (one two three) on the door handle before getting out and hurrying after him.

“Alright,” Marie says as she steps into the house. “You can take your shoes off on that rack… or you’re floating. You’re floating, don’t worry about it.”

“You sure?” Alcor snaps his fingers, and suddenly his dress shoes are sitting neatly by the door. He wiggles his socks at her. “It’s no big deal for me.”

She raises an eyebrow at that. “Huh. Neat trick.”

“Thanks!”

“Yeah…” After kicking her shoes off, she motions him into the kitchen. “I’ll get the teas going.”

“Ooo, what kinds have you got?”

“Kinds? What do you mean?”

“Kinds of tea?”

“Oh, uh… normal tea? I just get it from the supermarket.” She grimaces at him. “Are you like, an actual tea person? I’m sorry, I didn’t realise-”

“No, no, it’s fine! I’m not, I just- I thought you might’ve been, because you drink it so much.”

Marie snorts. “Ben told you that, didn’t he.”

“He did, uh, mention it once or twice.”

She chuckles at that as she picks up the kettle. Alcor leans against the stove behind her, and she moves over to the sink.

Turns the tap on… then turns it off, on, off, on, and cringes at the feeling of Alcor’s eyes on her back.

“Sorry,” she says, and sticks it under the water. “I, uh… Sorry.”

“No, don’t worry. It’s okay.”

Marie grits her teeth as she fiddles with the kettle switch until it’s (right). It’s not okay, she thinks. It’s ridiculous.

“You know, my sister really liked tea at one point.”

She blinks at that. Looks up at him.

“Your sister?”

“Yeah! I think it was Mabel, she liked-” Alcor stops there; he suddenly seems to realise he’s opened up a can of worms. “Ohhh… yeah. I, uh, had a sister. And she liked tea.”

Marie stares at him. “You had a sister?”

“Um. Yeah?”

“But you’re a demon?” She blinks again. “Ohh, you must be referring to the Mizar connection, not a literal, you know, blood relative thing. Sorry. Continue.”

Alcor makes a strange face at that, though, and she frowns.

“Or am I wrong?”

“Uh, it’s… it’s a long story?”

“You have a sister.”

“Had.”

“Huh. How does that work? How do demons even have-” Marie looks back at him, and notices he’s gone very still. “Oh, are you okay?” When he doesn’t answer immediately, she cringes. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to… bring up anything painful. Alcor?”

The kettle boils. After a long moment, Alcor seems to take a deep, shuddering breath, and she’s struck by how human he looks, now. If not for the wings wrapping around his form, it was hard to tell he was a demon at all.

He looks down at her, and there’s something fragile in his eyes when he tries for a smile.

“I’m… I’m okay. Sorry, just, it’s hard to explain it.” He blinks hard, but the shine doesn’t go away. “Even after all these years, it’s… it never gets easier.”

“Oh. I’m sorry to hear that.” All of a sudden, Marie’s words feel like pittance to this ancient being’s grief. She gulps, and gets out two cups. “Do you like tea? Or sugar?”

“Huh? Oh…” Alcor floated closer as she poured it. “I’ll take sugar.”

“How much?”

“Uh, a lot? I like sugar.”

Marie cracks a smile. “You do, huh. Alright, say when.”

She takes out a spoon and starts putting the sugar in - she sprinkles it at first, but when he shows no sign of telling her when, she digs up another spoonful and pours it in. Then another. Then another. Then she glances back at him.

Alcor cocks his head. “What?”

“...You want me to keep going?”

“Oh, yeah, yeah.”

“Okay, you really like sugar.” She passes the spoon to him. “Why don’t you, uh, figure out how much you want. I’m gonna get the milk.”

“Oh, sounds good!”

Marie steps back, and watches him put the spoon down and start pouring sugar directly into his mug. She opens her mouth to say something, but decides to let it be. If he wants to drink damp sugar… whatever. She’s not in the mood to raise a stink.

She walks to the fridge, and sees a flicker in the corner of her eye as she opens the door. Pointedly, she ignores it.

“Who’s he?”

Marie looks over at Alcor. “Huh?”

“I keep seeing him around you.” Alcor motions with the sugar bag to the corner of the room, and she stops dead. “Oh, he’s gone again. Who is he?”

“You… you see my hallucinations?”

“Oh, I see hallucinations, yeah. I’m a dream demon, I see all the stuff that’s in your head.” He absentmindedly chews on a spoonful of sugar, his eyes distant, deep in thought. “Yours are… strange, though. They feel more… separate than-”

Marie can feel her heart thudding in her chest. “A-actually,” she cuts in, and sets the milk down hard on the counter. “I-I don’t- I don’t want to talk. About this. Right now.”

Her hands are shaking as she picks up her tea. To his credit, Alcor seems to pick up on this.

“Oh, sorry!”

“It’s fine.”

“I’m really sorry, I didn’t mean to - oh, oh no, I wasn’t trying to link it back to the soul bits thing! I’m so sorry, I was just wondering-”

“It’s fine.” Marie grimaces at the flicker in her vision. “I don’t care, I just… I don’t want to talk about him right now. I don’t want to think about him.”

She pours her milk. Watches it swirl in her cup. Takes a deep breath, and lets it out.

“I want to…” she starts, and then stops. “I want to do something else.”

“Okay. Like a show, or a game, or-”

“A game sounds good!” Marie glances over at his feet. “I’m not very good at just sitting and watching something… but we could play a game! I got lots of board games.”

“Oh, yeah? Which ones do you have?”

“We have, uh… let me check.” Marie screws the cap onto the milk, sticks it in the fridge as she passes, then leans down to the games cabinet under one of the counters. “I got tons of them from when Ben was living here… Do you know Feed the Moon?”

“No? What’s that?”

“Oh, it’s this board game developed by some of the first lunar colonists, it’s interesting, it’s, uh…” She makes a face. “Kinda complicated, involves a lot of… graph paper… actually, I don’t want to get into a game like that right now. Do you know Oligopoly?”

“Ugh.”

Marie snorts. “Yeah, it’s not the best.” She rubs her eyes as she picks through the cabinet. “What else? We got, uh… Oh, we got chess?”

“Chess?”

Alcor’s head pops up from above the counter; it makes her jump.

“Uh, yeah? Do you like it?” She eyes the sugar all down his suit. “Did you finish that whole bag?”

“Yes! I love chess! I’m so glad it’s still around!” He grabs the board. “I mean, it’s not surprising, it’s older than me, but still!”

Marie looks at him. He’s already taking the board to her coffee table, his wings fluttering excitedly as he starts to set up the pieces. For a moment, his smile is so happy, so open, that she hardly even notices how it’s made up of knifelike fangs. For a moment, Alcor the Dreambender doesn’t look all that much like a demon to her.

He kind of looks like a young Ben.

Then Alcor looks over at her, and worry seeps into the shine in his eyes. “Oh…” he says, and she blinks. “Sorry, did you want to play chess? We can play something else if-”

“No, no, it’s fine! I like chess too.” Marie tries for a smile. She’s surprised at how natural it feels. “I’ll just get my tea.”

______________________________________________________________

Morning passes gently into the afternoon. Shadows slowly slide around the house as the sun dips lower, and rays of light reach a chessboard on the coffee table. It’s halfway through a game. The pieces are stopped there; a black queen stands side by side with a white knight, like they’ve called a ceasefire.

On the couch, overlooking them, is Marie. She lies back in the cushions, her fingers laced over her chest, her breath coming slow, steady. As Alcor watches, she grunts and shifts, and sinks a little lower in her seat. He can feel her aura, and at least for now, it’s as still and as peaceful as he’s ever felt it be.

He smiles at that. Then he leans down, and conjures a blanket to cover her sleeping form. He picks up her empty cup of tea, and brings it over to the counter.

Once that’s done, Alcor settles back down in the chair opposite her, and just listens to all the little sounds of this moment.

It was a good few games of chess, he thinks. It feels like they both needed that.

#transcendence au #marie #alcor the dreambender #ben #toothwrites

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gratitudeforshishou · 5 years

Text

who wants some mob psycho tunes im back on my bulllshit

i made a list of pieces of music id use as character themes for mp100 characters and mentioned tweaking it so

here u go bud

Shigeo Kageyama – Einstein on the beach by Philip glass

i found this piece fitting to mob’s character, it’s a minimalist ‘opera’ (operatic nature is up to debate) with an ongoing theme of counting repeatedly upwards. there are occasional interjections of short spoken sentences in very monotone voices. i think this piece at face value fits mob as a character theme very well, appearing vast, almost empty and unknown in nature, but in further inspection it’s constantly moving, full and unpredictable (each performance of the piece ranges in time, hours longer or shorter than expected). i think the nature of this piece still does nothing to really reflect some of the best things about mob’s character - his deep rooted kindness, motivation and determination, his deep love for the people around him and unwavering respect - but i think as a basic character theme, it fits quite well. n to reiterate I think the counting thing is neat as hell lol

Reigen Arataka – Turkish Bath by the Don Ellis Orchestra

i adore this piece and i think it reflects reigen’s character amazingly! it gives off the overall tone of being plenty sleazy and absolutely ridiculous, with a fairly relaxed tempo and a clashing harmony – for example, when the melody comes in for the first time, both trumpets are very obviously out of tune with each other. what i love about this though, despite this piece giving off this shady and almost humorous vibe, it’s meticulously written and performed. the descending quarter tone scale on the trumpet is tough as hell to nail, for example. this whole piece emits such vivid reigen vibes for every reason, its so funky fresh

Ritsu Kageyama – Electric Counterpoint by Steve Reich

ill just link the third movement but if anyone wants to listen to the whole thing be my guest ! i think wit ritsu being a kageyama sibling, we gotta stick with the minimalist theme. this piece is performed by a total of ten electric guitars (two of which are basses), and is made up of a series of short guitar licks that grow and develop until the end of the movement. i don’t have a huge amount to say besides that the method of layering and adding guitar parts is organised, but additionally clever and complex,,,,,,,,,,,,just like ritsu,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, also haha electric guitars theyre pretty emo right

Serizawa Katsuya – Warrior by Hiromi: The Trio Project

when i made this list for the first time, the one i gave seri was a lot shorter and more subdued in nature. ive decided that nah, he deserves something much more bright and beautiful so !! heres this !! this un really makes me think of post-claw seri – the whole thing is absolutely flourishing, so emotive and it has such a large and captivating sound. it comes with moments of high and almost manic energy, some more subdued and relaxed parts, but is overall has such a solid and comforting presence. Is this my comfort piece ? perhaps

??? – Sacrificial Dance from Rite of Spring by Igor Stravinsky

hooooo shit buddy lemme tell u about this un. so rite of spring is a ballet about a pagan ritual that happens once per year in which a virgin woman is selected and given a red dress, who then has to dance herself to death as a sacrifice for a fruitful spring. Its stupid batshit but the reason i bring that up is because the specific part of the ballet id put to ???% is the sacrificial dance itself. basically this is the part of the ballet where the girl is given the dress and she loses control, going ham while the music gets choppy and violent. still it is more the music than the story that id put to the character – its terrifying because it’s so unkown and so unpredictable. rite of spring is notorious for being fiendishly difficult to play, and that’s because the timing and rhythms are so whack and random. the chords are clashing and sudden, as the piece nears an end it escalates and its impossible to know what is going where. but this being said, there are areas of ominous calm – still unpredictable in rhythm, but subdued. in one way it’s a polar opposite to Einstein on the Beach (the piece i put to mob) but in some ways i feel like that woulda been a good piece to use for ???% too

Shou Suzuki – Garage Drummer by James Campbell

tbh I don’t really know anything about this piece so i cant say much but i think itd make an interesting theme for shou ! aside from being weirdly sorta funky and unpredictable and not to mention with moments of going ham, the fact that its carefully written and practiced fits with the character as well – coming off as impulsive and brash maybe but in fact very thought out. also drums are the fucking cool

Kurata Tome – Fish and Chips by Grace Kelly ft. Leo P

guys…..its funky fresh….. high energy, use of improvisation and also Using The Instrument Not Exactly How It Says On The Tin. its short but sweet, bit ridiculous and completely unashamed which is some Good Shit !! I was also thinking of John Adams’s short ride in a fast machine – its also super high energy, fast paced and it gave me p vivid space vibes if u fancy checking that un out aswell

Teruki Hanazawa – Jazz Suite II by Dimitri Shostakovich

when i made the first list and put this un to teru, an amazing artist replied with this fantastic drawing of teru with the caption ‘lets dance!’ n that is p much exactly why i put this piece to teru. this piece is almost drawlingly sarcastic in nature, though i feel it fits teru as a sort of huge and boisterous dance !! u know how after teru loses his first fight w mob he goes through that whole “superiority complex about not having a superiority complex” thing ? i feel like this piece encapsulates that mood so well, but not just that !! in his moments of utter selflessness as well as those of bigheadedness, teru has such a large and loveable personality and I feel like this tune fits it so well !! teru if ur reading this…….i love u bro

Tsubomi Takane – Leila’s Birthday by Hanneke Cassel

i heard this one for the first time when a scottish friend of mine was playing some trad tunes in the kitchen ! weve never known much about tsubomi, besides her old connection to mob and what we’ve seen of her personality in the later chapters. ofc i love that tsubomi shits on the “main character gets the girl at the end of the day” trope, and that she remains a loved and solid character of her own afterwards. shes a self respecting, take no shit and genuinely kindhearted girl and i felt this tune captures the sort of freedom i associate with tsubomi’s character well. plus in my personal experience, i don’t know much about scottish trad at all but i love to hear it and like to learn about if where i can – just like how we all feel about tsubomi int it

Dimple – Why Does It Hurt When I Pee? By Frank Zapper

i thought of this as a joke when i was really drunk the other day but it was like 2 am and i couldn’t sleep after that bc like…….spirits eat other spirits right……do they have to like……piss…….

#im sorry it ended up being longer than i meant.................anyway better do songs next huh #mob psycho 100 #mp100 #reigen arataka #serizawa katsuya #shigeo kageyama #ritsu kageyama #teruki hanazawa #suzuki shou #kurata tome #takane tsubomi #mp100 dimple #long post

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heartofsurgingflame · 5 years

Note

hey hi so basically would you please do us all the honor of maybe saying your opinions on all the characters of tcomc? I know you love V4, just curious about your opinions on everyone else

*CRACKS KNUCKLES* ok so im gonna put this under a readmore because theres a good amount of these bitches. i’;ll look on wikipedias list of characters so i dont forget anyone

dantes/monte cristo: I LOVE HIM A LOT ACTUALLY, i know i dont talk about him as much as i talk about veeyfour partly because everyone likes him so everyone talks about him but theyre tied for my favorite character .... i relate to him a lot and i want him to be happy :(

abbe faria: i dont tend to like static characters often but the concept of an old guy you meet in prison who knows everything and adopts you, and also hes a priest, is so fucking funny so i have to like him. rest in peace my old bro

bertuccio: he sucks because hes mean to v4- just kidding i enjoy him. he’s a good guy i think, definitely a better person than v4, only thing i can really complain about is his whole “oo benedetto is a nasty little man because i didnt hit him” for personal reasons i strongly dislike that but hey it was the 1800s

luigi vampa: ok so hes one of those people who you can only refer to them by their full name. i think hes good as well. wise bandit leader. monty how do you even meet these people

peppino: oh god i dont even remember this one that well sorry

ali: don’t like that he exists..... slavery’s bad

baptistin: dont remember forming an opinion on this guy either

jacopo: he’s cool i guess. i like how they changed him in 2002. absolute bro

haydee: THAT GIRL IS DAUGHTER TO ME i used to be ehhh on her but then i realized i just don’t like that she and monty get married. she’s fucking good

mercedes: *WAILING* definitely one of my favorites i get so emo over her i really wish she had a more fulfilling ending. i would like to have seen more of what she was like pre-dantes getting sent to prison too, she was really fun at the beginning of the book like she would Not take fernand’s shit

fernand: awful awful man and i think he should’ve suffered more but as a character i like him he’s just... kind of a moron but also evil and half of everything he says ever is a lie

albert: who could forget dear albert he’s fucking crazy in a good way like it makes sense because mercedes was very like... set in her decisions and kind of drastic with what she says in the beginning of the book. and fernand is fernand. like you know his parents are crazy so he’s crazy. he’s a good kid though despite being a rich brat

franz: god bless him he’s the only one who realizes monte cristo is kinda suspicious. unless you count countess g---- but she just thought he was a vampire. but it’s good to have franz itd be a bit boring if monty was like loved by everybody instantly

danglars: YES i like him a lot he’s just evil and does not feel remorse he’s really fucking funny too because he’s a cuckold but he owns it. you know

hermine: well she was fuckin . that’s her prerogative i guess. has good taste in men except for her husband. i think she can do whatever she wants

eugenie: *SHOOTS LASERS FROM MY EYES* I LOVE HERRR i take back saying her mom should be able to do whatever she wants eugenie is the one who should be able to do whatever she wants forever. like she was not in the wrong at all unlike some people in this book

villefort: ok i know you know bhow i feel about this man but i just want to say he’s like... i think i don’t have a single issue with him the way he’s written is just so good and i wouldn’t change anything which is insane. yes im serious i wouldnt even make him actually gay because, thatd be weird, he is evil. also i relate to him too not as much as i relate to monty usually but

renee: what did she do even i guess i dont have much of an opinion on her. i like her dog in that one fuckign i watched like 2 episodes of the british miniseries the one in black and white. she has a little fluffy dog in it

the saint-merans: i guess theyre pretty funny because theyre rich people and have to put up with the way that villefort is. i love how all of villefort’s extended family just destroys each other

valentine: not a huge fan of the subplot with her and max, like i understand its narrative purpose and i wouldnt take it out by any means but i dont really care about those two together. i do like her quite a bit though. she managed to break the cycle of being a shitty person because of your family and im proud of her for that

noirtier: LEGEND he made a few points. like fuck napoleon but noirtier at least had a spine , perhaps a bit too much but you know how it is. he’s really funny because he does not respect his son in any way

heloise: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO I REALLY LIKE HER nobody properly appreciates her like i’ve seen people view her as just a punishment for villefort like shes her own person. and though murder is bad shes kind of a victim of the way that society was. similar to villefort. the problem is capitalism am i right

edouard: WHAT son? i don’t have an opinion on him

benedetto: he’s the closest i can come to disliking a tcomc character. like i dont like that ali exists but that’s dumas’s fault. benedetto is uh. horrible. he’s a bit funny though (sorry i keep saying characters are funny) is it hypocritical of me to be like i dont like benedetto because he’s evil but like danglars because he’s evil? maybe

morrel: dantes’s dad #3. he’s a good guy i appreciate that he was fully ready to shoot himself to save his family

maximilian: i like him, not as much as i like valentine but he’s cool

julie and her husband: no opinion really. glad things worked out for them

caderousse: a merderer............ ok i actually like him i’m sorry i don’t pay as much attention to him as i do to v4 fernand and danglars i should. probably change that. i think its funny that wikipedia basically describes him as a tailor who turns to a life of crime

whatever the hell cad’s wife’s nickname was: ok so the chapter where she dies can be interpreted in a number of ways right like i know one is that caderousse was nervous because he had decided to kill her but i like the idea that she had the idea to kill the jeweler first and caderousse was like do i have to and she was like ya. and then he just decided to get her too in the spur of the moment. would have liked to know more about her

dantes’s dad: :( he was nice.... we get like one nice dad and he dies. ok morrel is there too but...

lucien: DANGLARS POLYCULE he’s REALLY funny i like him quite a bit. he’s like. snarky

ok theres like at least 7 other characters but theyre minor and i odnt have much in the way of opinions on them. that’s all

#Anonymous

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elle-eedee · 5 years

Text

dcom daddies: ranked

whats up sluts i’m here to give you the content you did NOT know you needed: a foolproof algorithmic ranking of a mild selection of disney channel dads!

beast (descendants)

hotness scale: extremely tall (over a foot taller than me! this is Very Important to the scale) and he seems to be a mere thread’s width away from Unhinged at all times, which i love. i also think it’s very sexy of him to still have such a monstrous way about himself (what with the roaring and the growling) 20something years post-curse.... makes me wonder very vividly if such energies carry to the b*droom........ *clears throat* 10/10

quality of character scale: it eternally amuses me that beast seems to learn almost Nothing over the course of this trilogy. he’s literally pro-isle the ENTIRE time jsjdndjdjd..... not great considering it puts him directly at odds with his son (and, like, with social progress) but he Does seem to act the way he does with the kingdom’s safety in mind! plus when he’s not accidentally supporting magical fascism he’s super dorky. i love his goofy dance moves 7.5/10

total score: 17.5/20...... with this score alone you can tell this system isnt rigged bc if i had it my way he’d be winning

hades (descendants)

hotness scale: i hate his party city clown wig but i’m a total sucker for guys in makeup (EVEN THOUGH A DECENT SHADE OF LIPSTICK WOULD HAVE BROUGHT HIS ENSEMBLE TOGETHER. WHY DID THEY PROPOSE IT ON THE CHARACTER DESIGN WALL IF THEY WERENT GONNA FOLLOW THROUGH!!!) and i think the fact that hes Very Sleepy and doesnt own a dog makes him my dream guy 9.5/10

quality of character scale: he literally sings a song about how cool he thinks it is that he’s a shitty dad............ but he DOES come through when his kid needs him, so that’s nice i guess. i would have liked to see more of him but i’ll settle for reading and writing intricate fan works that delve into a hypothetical personality for him that’s mainly conjecture 7.25/10

total score: 16.75/20 i wanna see him in some preppy auradon clothes

jafar (descendants)

hotness scale: i wish i had nicer things to say about this man. he just....... bears so little resemblance to the original jafar it makes me :( maybe if he was more gangly, or if he carried himself w the same potent gay energy that og jafar has? itd also help it he wasnt a racist caricature. 4.5/10

quality of character scale: again, very much a racist caricature. jafar doesnt steal!!! why would This be what he chose to do with himself! but he does seem to be, perhaps, the least bad of the core four’s parents, which counts for something i suppose. 3/10

total score: 7.5/20 sorry bud

dr facilier (descendants)

hotness scale: listen. it’s dr facilier. what am i supposed to do, NOT give him a perfect score on the sexy scale? 10/10

quality of character scale: he just loves his daughter and wants to make sure she’s getting what’s hers!!!!! his dynamic with celia makes me really happy they seem so fun! though i guess you could argue it sucks that he’d send his darling babey dohter to do errands for big mean scary hades considering that Everyone on the isle seems to quake at the sight of him. but im sure facilier only does that to ensure that celia can hold her own! 8/10

total score: 18/20 and it’d probably be higher if we’d seen more of him

mr smee (descendants)

hotness scale: not only does this man fuck, judging by the ages of his kids he fucked RECENTLY. get it baby live your truth 7/10

quality of character scale: he seems to be SO kind and sweet to his baby sons..... holding their little hands and such!!! and judging by how nervous the kids are i’d imagine it was primarily smee’s idea for them to go to auradon. extremely noble sacrifice for their benefit even though he’ll miss them 10/10!!!!!

total score: 17/20 i want to kiss his hand, if he’ll have me

zevon necrodopolous (zombies)

hotness scale: every time i look at this man i think of this post. he’s the perfect amount of frumpy for my tastes and his voice is so unique!!!!! i’d let his z-band malfunction so he could *** ** ***** * ******* **** 9/10

quality of character scale: really really cares about his kids and wants them to be safe!! he raises his voice once which im not a huge fan of but i suppose it was justified given the circumstances. also that shot of him goofing about with d*le in the end scene shows remarkable capacity for forgiveness after decades of trauma and discrimination! what a guy. 9/10

total score: 18/20 an absolute dilf!!!!!

dale (zombies)

hotness scale: looks like an uncrustable. 0/10

quality of character scale: a fucking cop. die bitch! 0/10

total score: 0/20 get in since you wanna act clown

coach jack bolton (high school musical)

hotness scale: honestly pretty young for my tastes. and i literally Always swipe left on athletes, so..... fine looking, but not for me. 5/10

quality of character scale: obviously he grows as the series progresses but i feel like jack is Always in the way of troy getting what he wants, which sucks. i like that he’s kinda goofy on his off hours with his family exactly as much as i Hate how much he yells when hes on the job. i do wish we lived in the timeline where he and miss darbus actually had that duet about their disagreements, though. 5/10

total score: 10/20 truly an Average dcom daddy

vance evans (high school musical)

hotness scale: due to personal reasons i will be having bad taste. however, this man’s fashion sense in IMPECCABLE. i mean, the colors??? the unbuttoned collar???? come on now. there is also the gratuitous use of the d-word to consider......................... anyways 7.5/10

quality of character scale: it’s hard to tell how much of his interest in furthering troy’s career is out of sincerity and how much of it is sharpay nudging him. but either way the result is a man who supports his daughter unconditionally! he could be nicer to ryan, though (plus he’s an evil capitalist) 6/10

total score: 13.5/20 i feel like he and fulton have had Relations

mr gifford (lemonade mouth)

hotness scale: listen, i’m a simple guy. i see a basic-looking man pursuing age gap romance in the midst of a mid-life crisis, i support him unconditionally. also i am just Really vibing with that oversized denim shirt on him!!! there’s an egregious amount of arm hair poking out that just works. good for him! and this is a small moment but i’m very flustered over his natural Touchy Feely instinct after wen pokes out his eye... however: man has no eyebrows. 8.5/10

quality of character scale: i’m not a child of divorce so i don’t know how this stuff works, but i feel like he springs a lot of major decisions on wen? not ideal. on the other hand, we DO stan that he has sydney move in before they’re married. this is not a christian home!!!! 6/10

total score: 14.5/20 probably my favorite lemonade mouth dad, but mostly because he’s like the only one paid any attention by the narrative

mr banjaree (lemonade mouth)

hotness scale: men really have beautifully sculpted noses and we just let them, huh. i’m definitely overusing the word Handsome in this list, but in this case? i’m justified. mr banjaree’s beard suits him SO well and his hair looks so soft...... and we love the implicit cleanliness of a man who wears socks in the house! 8/10

quality of character scale: i super SUPER dont agree with this man’s Smothering-Adjacent Methods (and also i know firsthand that strict parentage just drives kids to be more rebellious, lmao) but all things considered he really just wants the best for his family PLUS he’s willing to meet mo halfway at the end! :’) 6/10

total score: 14/20 the way i feel about him is the way i feel when i get crushes on pastors in that You Are Complicit In My Trauma But We’re Gonna Kiss About It way

mr delgado (lemonade mouth)

hotness scale: OOOOH GLASSES! 5/10

quality of character scale: it’s sort of implied that the Wacko Energies of charlie’s family are mostly the fault of his mom so it’s cool of this man to distance himself from that. he is, of course, still complicit in Whatever The Hell Her Deal Is unless he is constantly fighting with her offscreen 6/10

total score: 11/20 would have loved to see more of him

mr yamada (lemonade mouth)

hotness scale: another chapter in the saga of unbuttoned collars! doesn’t get a lot of opportunities to show off his strengths but i appreciate that he is not the thinnest dad in town 6.5/10

quality of character scale: WOW fuck this guy. very dismissive of stella’s aspirations!!!!! i don’t like that he feels the need to talk Over her to her mom when he’s asking about her vegetarianism. dude she is right there.... however it’s a lil touching when he holds her guitar up at the end, so... 4/10?

total score: 10.5/20 *thinks about his slightly protruding tummy in his last scene* *thinks about his slightly protruding tummy in his last scene* *thi

bob duncan (good luck charlie: it’s christmas!)

hotness scale: in keeping this Specific to the feature-length xmas special, i will say that bob duncan is QUITE handsome! disappointed that he was wearing a shirt in the scene at the pool.... ill bet if this movie came out post-workout/makeover he’d have been shirtless >:/ i feel robbed... spare tummy, sir? spare tummy? additionally i love a man who rolls up his sleeves AND a man who stans kaiju movies!! also i love that he, quite literally, canonically fucks 8.5/10

quality of character scale: he’s about as charmingly incompetent as he is in the show, but the difference here is that he literally did not do a damn thing wrong! all he wanted to do was be civil with his inlaws and he frankly deserves MUCH better. its clear from his banter with the kids that he loves them very much (also i love how frequently he feels the need to jump/dive for things in this movie. silly slapstick icon) 8.75/10

total score: 17.25/20 this man’s mere presence oozes nostalgia

jerry russo (wizards of waverly place: the movie)

hotness scale: this man was MADE for me. the bottomless collection of hawaiian shirts....... the TWO tummy out scenes..........the fucked up evil thing his voice does when the kids try to steal the spellbook!!! he really has it all. also i love that he is truly just trying to have some beach intercourse 9/10

quality of character scale: i love that even when he doesn’t remember the kids he still maintains a little dadly rapport with them? the instincts...... it’s also incredibly good of him to relive his decision to give up his magic without hesitation once he realizes the severity of the situation :’0 10/10

total score: 19/20 i’ve never seen an episode of the show but im really about to start

neil morris (dadnapped)

hotness scale: handsome....... mr morris makes me feel simultaneously like a sapiosexual AND a morosexual because although he completed enough schooling to become a dentist, he also threw it away for a writing career like an absolute champ. also i find it unbelievably charming how Along For The Ride he is about the idea of being kidnapped. a man after my own heart 8.25/10

quality of character scale: this is a tricky one...... neil DOES show active concern for his daughter’s safety when push comes to shove, but he also has my least favorite type of redemption arc: “you THOUGHT i was neglecting you, but actually i was thinking about you the whole time and just never expressed it! we good?” so like. bleh. but he’s pretty mild mannered which i deeply appreciate in a man! 6.5/10

total score: 14.75/20 maybe talk to your daughter instead of writing a macgyver ripoff, dumbass

major joe mason (princess protection program)

hotness scale: prime dad bod, very believable for his line of work. also he has such a Gentle Way about himself when he’s around princesses....... i love all the hand holding when he’s escorting rosie. absolutely my type 8.75/10

quality of character scale: gosh.... where do i even BEGIN!!! his whole dynamic with carter is so ideal... i was apprehensive at first because his job would require him to be Absent a lot of the time, but upon reflection it’s clear that he’s raised carter well enough that he can totally trust her to be on her own, and also she’s only sad to see him go because she sincerely enjoys his company. everything about his profession is so noble and i love the way he can carry himself as casually or as politely as a given situation calls for. worst thing he does is say “i might have to stop calling you ‘pal’” because his daughter is wearing a pretty dress. i wish he was my dad but i’ll settle for him being my husband 9.75/10

total score: 18.5/20 i almost made a ppp self insert this morning specifically for Him

ted thompson (zapped)

hotness scale: athletes arent sexy!! this guy’s face screams The Only Websites I Know How To Use Are Facebook And Reddit and also he’s a dog person BUT he is sporting quite the tumbey if i do say so myself and for that i shall let him live. 4/10

quality of character scale: ok i know the whole point of this movie is Boys Bad but i hate men who are loud and i hate dads who get Weird about the inherent femininity of their daughters. when he calls zoey “sport” and then cringes like he’s made a mistake? dumb and unnecessary. HOWEVER all of his efforts to bond with zoey are really really sincere. like when he fixes her music box? that has NOTHING to do with the app he just Does It!!!! the movey mightve rubbed off on me a little too much but there are multiple ways to show love and just bc im not used to his way doesnt mean it has no worth! 6/10

total score: 10/20 mr thompson sir im sorry i doubted you at the start of the film

rob adams (radio rebel)

hotness scale: this man dresses 5-10 years younger than he looks and i respect that for him. but i was expecting him to be a bit more of a slimeball considering how tara talks about him in the opening scene... and you guys know how much i love slimeballs. regardless, pretty handsome! 6.5/10

quality of character scale: it’s nice that he goes to such a Public and Corporate effort to connect to his stepdaughter! even if it’s in a way that financially benefits him, it’s pretty clear that he cares about this family and wants to do right by them. nothing exceptional, though 7/10

total score: 13.5/20 i GUESS i’d be down to smash if he asked

ralph bartlett (read it and weep)

hotness scale: ok i was gonna say something mean about the fact that he’s balding but honestly he has really nice arms........ in addition he’s really quirky and optimistic which i am going to admire into my grave!! when he gets excited about having customers during the finale his voice quirks with an almost charlie day-esque charm. handsome. ALSO he calls jamie “princess” which is!!!!!!! something 7.5/10

quality of character scale: the way ralph parents his kids is Very 2000s in that he kinda babies his daughter but gets to pal around with his son, but i guess both dynamics come from a place of love and he could be doing much worse. plus he’s an honest hardworking small business owner! i support him 7/10

total score: 14.5/20 i would definitely go out for pizza with him

dr james hartley (how to build a better boy)

hotness scale: THIS. THIS IS WHAT DCOM DADDIES ARE ALL ABOUT. gosh..... this is truly the Most dad ive ever seen in my life. i love how his hair is always mussed..... how he’s so Desperate to relax that he falls asleep after Fifteen Seconds of smooth jazz..... and also. like. hes a scientist?? hello??? pretty sexy of him. i want to give this man the relaxation he deserves 10/10

quality of character scale: ok so,,,...,, kinda fucked up that he lied to his whole family (with the possible exception of his wife—sidenote, WHY did they make dr hartley married? his wife never comes up except when bart says she’s out of town. let him be single so i can slide into those dms) and EXTRA kinda fucked up that he works for the government? what a scab. BUT it’s very very clear that he cares about his kids (and gabby) and prioritizes their safety above all else! also, did you SEE how happy he was when mae won homecoming queen....... he loves her so so so much! :’0 8.5/10

total score: 18.5/20 i thirst tweeted about this man and roger bart replied ‘Aw, thanks!’ so i dont know where to go from here

#my worst post. look at it everybody #descendants #high school musical #disney channel #lemonade mouth #wizards of waverly place #good luck charlie #zombies #princess protection program #read it and weep #zapped #dadnapped #radio rebel #how to build a better boy #the term 'dcom daddy' was coined by poddin this together so nobody's allowed to get mad at me for it. also im right about each of these

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dont-follow-me-im-scared · 5 years

Text

My worst goodbye

Per my therapist request im "journaling" breakup I guess. I mean its been a long time coming but this time it was real and needed to this might be long but here goes:

The force,

I dont even know where to start so I'll start from the begining. The night I met you, when I walked into that bar I had no intention of meeting my soul mate. Yes soul mate. I never believed in them until I met you. But after 9 long years ive learned sometimes we meet our soul mate and we dont get to keep them. I had quite a bit to drink, see you didnt know this but I was 19 I just looked old enough to be there and I had gotten divorced a few months before my world would be forever rocked and changed. The night carried on the christmas air was no match for the drink and the long sleeve I had on. I removed layers the more I drank and I stayed close to the bar. This tall man with the bluest eyes id ever seen was taking care of my drink needs but young me saw a mountain I wanted to climb. I was informed you were married when the regulars realized my attention wasnt going anywhere but you. I flashed the bar (dumb kid is probably what you thought) but everyone in there knew it was for you. Hell I said I wouldnt do it unless you were there. The night carried on, my friends were restless trying to protect whatever modesty they felt I had that night. I wanted to go to the after party I was told youd be attending. They refused and wanted to get me home. Closing time was coming. I wrote my number on a napkin and waited. You went back towards the bathrooms and I knew somehow in my awe struck drunken stuper that was my chance. I walked back caught you right at the end of the hall. Do you remember what I said? I can. The words and moment is forever burned into my brain. "I can keep a secret". Slipped my number into your front pocket smooth as fuck. Which isnt me. But you know that right? Because after that night you saw sides of me no one was ever allowed to see. You saw me grow as a person and into a woman. That was the begining of the end. That singular moment with rumple on my breathe as I stood on my tip toes to lean as close to your ear as I could when I spoke those words. I took in how you smelled. I had no idea soon that smell would be my favorite and put my spirit at ease.

I woke up the next morning with a text from an unknown number. Then the conversation started. You filled in the parts of the night that wasnt clear. You made me nervous. A sensation that would never die down. Tuesday. She'll be at work. Dinner and hang out at the house? Sure. I bet you thought you were getting lucky that night. Not as lucky as I was going to be I guess. Because see even though this is a goodbye, and one thats tearing me apart I was so lucky to feel this. Not everyone gets to experience this with anyone in their entire life. You had a young child. Maybe 3 months I think. Timing in the universe is shitty like that. We sat on the couch. Me almost shaking with nerves but trying to keep my calm because I refused to look a fool in front of you. Do you remember what we watched? Big bang theory. And from then on anytime I saw an episode (I never watched it myself) my thoughts would gravitate back to that couch with you. Do you know how hard thats going to be on me now because that shows everywhere. I guess thats not your problem though. We didnt have sex. I was too nervous and I mean I felt like I was going to puke you made me so nervous. But there was a warmth. This tiny spark of a fire that was felt by me at least. We made out alot. But everytime you reached for my belt my gut screamed "No! Not yet" and ive never been one to ignore my gut. I left. I parked my car a few houses down. The late December air felt so cold against my face because my cheeks were burning like id be in the gym. This couldnt be real. I texted you when I got to the end of the street. "Im sorry I couldn't have sex with you I was so nervous if you dont want to meet up again i get it." I expected you to blow me off. I mean you are older and a bartender. I knew in my head what you were use to with women. I had only been with two people my whole life but you. You reeked experience. Then my phone did something that felt magical in the moment. It lit up with that text. That text reassuring me you wanted to see me again. The text that made me float the whole way home.

The visits became more frequent. Sex with you was amazing. You engulfed my body in what seemed like worship. Not one inch of me ignored. Hands and mouth just exploring the new territory. I was more adventurous. I wanted to make you happy in every way possible. Theres a need inside me to make sure youre happy. There's this new feeling like in a woman and not just some highschooler whos date is trying to get lucky. Theres a chemistry unmatched and indescribable in all honesty. It happened on the couch. The 2nd time I saw you. You carried my straddling body to your room all that was on was my unbutton jeans and your jeans. Your arms lifted me with such ease I gasped. I remember. See how much I remember. Your bedroom smelt like soap and the sheets smelled clean. The only light in the room was the green from the clock by your bed. Then before I knew it your mouth was where no other mans had been. You gave me a new experience I had been deprived of before. Then you were inside of me when I felt like my body was going to stop. Laying there after wards, your hands playing with my spine while we had small conversations in between sighs I considered if this could be forever. I knew right then you were different. I knew we were different. I knew there was something in my way but never desired to remove it. Your kiss at the front door when I was leaving had a longing. Like you didnt want to send me away. It was dark. The neighbors didnt know but as bright as I felt like I was shinning I wondered if they were peering out of the windows to see the source. Was any of this real for you? I dont think I want the answer because it was so real for me. This all sounds crazy. You're married and I knew but here I was.

It got to where id barley make it through your unlocked door without you scoping me up like youd waited all week to get your hands on me. The text in between visits didnt seem like enough any more. So I started doing what any logical in love person would do. I started getting hotel rooms and going to the bar on the weekends. I had to see you more. Hear your voice. See you smile at me from across that bar knowing I was picturing having you under me on every surface there. It made it fun right? Like we had a huge secret right in front of everyone. Including your sister in law who bartended with you some nights. It was a rush right? Knowing I was going to be in that weed infused hotel room half drunk mostly stoned in the see through black robe you love(d) so much. Knowing there was nothing between me and you but this thin fabric. Do you think people could see it on our faces? Your friends became mine because I was at the bar so often but none of them knew. Our conversations grew and we became friends who just happen to explode with this chemistry. It was more than what it had been but that was the most itd ever be. Remember the Halloween you dressed at a 20s gangster. Remeber the red dress i rushed into the bar in on new years eve so I could kiss you by midnight. Do you remember taking me in your arms around my waist and kissing me in front of everyone? I'll never forget because that was a moment where I thought this is how it could be. I met you for lunches. I met you at quicktrips for a five minute visit. Boyfriends came and went but you never left. I kept you around. Remember the apartments down the street I moved into so I could be closer. You whistling while I was waiting at my open front door. That smile. You nuzzling me after on the balcony while i smoked. I hated you had to leave me every time. You lingered in my door hesitant to walk away. The good thing about me living so close is you got to spend more time with me.

I stated you were my soul mate. I mean it. I have forever missed my chance with the one person I truly believe was made for me. All because a year of timing. You told me so many times had it not been for your baby youd leave. I believed you. I love my husband and my daughter but no one will ever light the fire you did inside me and still do. Which is why I need to walk away. Youre a source of confusion in my life. I cant allow myself to question if my relationships right because I dont have the feeling I did with you. Does that make me bad? I dont think so. I love him and dont want to hurt him which is why I have to do this. Cutting an imprint with you is one of the hardest things ive had to do but hurting him would be harder. I'll never forget a million things about you. Memories with you. I honestly hope you'll never forget me. I wish I could tell my daughter about you one day and how she never needs to settle unless someone makes her feel like you made me feel.

Love always

Youre biggest fan.

#breakup #soul mates #sometimes it doesnt work

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tumblunni · 5 years

Text

I had a really weird dream involving Dr Maddiman. Its a shame i can barely remember any of it and also it seems i woke up before it ended? Like i just had this overwhelming sense that allll the plot threads were gonna be wrapped up any second now and then BOOM awake. So just a whole bunch of random stuff happened with no real explanation at all.

It was some sort of post apocolyptic setting i think? Humanity was in these small isolated cities fighting against some sort of invading army but we never actually saw the aliens themselves. And some part of my brain was like "it makes sense its the same rules as a hairdresser and the design takes cues from a pack of AAA batteries". I have NO idea what that means! So basically everythibg was super vague and undescribed and dream-me just had a sense of already being a long time fan of this series and knowing enough to fill in the gaps. Apparantoy this was some sort of adaptation of a thing id already seen, but id been told the ending was different and more accurate to the manga? Also i wasnt actually a person watching this show i was still the protagonist of the show yet i acted like i'd been reincarnated and relived this week a million times or something

ANYWAY the way dr maddiman comes in is that he was some sort of 'brilliant but dangerous' expert the government had hired to help our fight against the aliens. It wasnt really explained why he was.. yknow.. maddiman. Like is this meant to be that ghosts also exist in this sci fi universe? Was he a half alien hybrid instead of a yokai? Was it just human maddiman with the personality of yokai maddiman due to ptsd...? In any case he didnt seem entirely tethered to the laws of reality and nobody knew exactly how he pulled off all his scientific miracles. He was treated as the only guy who could understand the mindset of the aliens, but that also made him dangerous because he trapped in the delusion of everything being okay and fun and happy and he often did evil things by accident while having good intentions. But they didnt have anyone else who'd cracked the code of the alien weaponry so they had to put up with him. He was just sorta assigned a crack team of secret agents whose job was Be The Old Man's Friend So We Dont All Die. Dont let him realise how the world is all destroyed and such, just play along with his goofyness and try and remind him to do his important work while dancing around why its important. it was super creepy how he was locked up and gaslighted like this!! And he was all 'oh im sure when im done with my ultimate experiment i can go home to my wife and kids' and yeah it was implied here that the same backstory applied :( 'distract the old man and validate his false opinion that his family is still alive and waiting for him' :( poor sci fi madds :(

Oh also for some reason he seemed to be wearing elements of Adventure era Dr Eggman's outfit? But just the general style of the coat and the wearing goggles that he never actually uses. And he had a very warm and cuddly autumnal colourscheme

Anyway i was part of the Super Secret Grampa Cherishing Division whose job was to act as his assistant but also secretly be packing a bazillion weapons to neutralize him if he poses a danger to humanity. But i started to genuinely care for the guy and question the 'any atrocity is permitted for the sake of saving the world' philosophy of my bosses. Also it was just very weird how it was this post apocolypse alien fighting action thing yet i didnt see ANY OF IT cos this story was confined to this one laboratory. It was surreal hearing about all this stuff happening offscreen!

I think Maddiman's main project was some sort of dimensional transport thing using salvaged alien tech? It was just a door in his lab that usually led to a closet but if he got it working itd teleport us straight to the alien base and save the world. And a lot of it wasnt explained but i got this great sense that itd all come together with a great twist ending evebtually but then i woke up before i got that far. Same for the reveal of this maddiman's new sci fi backstory and soooo many other dropped plot threads. Alas!

So anyway: closet. Closet with one of those bead curtain things cos i was thinking about them when i fell asleep. It was supposed to be a teleport but when it malfunctioned it had really scary negative effects warping people's biology and stuff. I remember one of the test subjects was sent in for a five day trip to a specific alternate dimension but then when they came back itd been several years and theyd had to survive in a deadly wasteland and been mutated into a hellbeast. And maddiman had a huge breakdown because he felt like his recklessness and optimism towards this experiment had caused this mistake to happen, and he'd never realized just how awful the consequences could be. He was babbling motor mouth discussing theories for where it went wrong and there was something like 'we'd only tested it for one day trips and assumed that just programming two of them would equal two days but actually with each additional number on the screen it multiplies the days by 3" And there was something about like...the bead curtain was the machine rather than the door itself? Like trying it on a bunch of different doors around the lab to try and find a way to cure this person.

And there was some sort of artificial intelligence computer with the personality of an adorable lil girl, who helped maddiman do calculations and stuff. She missed the mistake in this calculation cos her concept of linear time and the limits of human organs was kinda undeveloped. She only existed within the realm of numbers after all, and didbt even have functionality to record footage of her human friends's faces. No idea wtf a human looks like! So maddiman was lost in his desperate grief of potentially accidebtally killing or at least mentally scarring a person and the government would probably kill them now if they saw they were a super mutant. And he was sobbing and begging this AI to help, his last resort was her maybe being able to see a brainwave that he'd missed. But she was freaking out cos she didnt even fully understand why maddiman was crying let alone what to do to fix it. Eventually she did manage to find a solution theough some simple different logic thing that she had from her perspective as a computer. And that person was saved but still traumatized and maddiman had a moment of realizing just how high stakes everything was and freaking out. He was like 'whats wrong with my head, why didnt i notice that, why was i so reckless, why cant i seem to grasp basic human logic that i need right now" Having a big existential crisis of 'wait how did i even get in this lab, where's my family and why do i seem to have superpowers'. Protagonist mission: hide all the goddamn mirrors to avoid this weird ghostgramp (...aliengramp??) from realizing he's dead (..or an alien??) and losing control of himself. And everyone was running around talking about 'containment procedures' and poor maddiman didnt know that if his panic attack continued he might just straight up be killed for outliving his usefulness. So the protagonist was desperate to help him calm down and it sucked SO MUCH cos they had to lie about his past and weave the web of deception around him again for his own safety. In the end they just hugged him close until he calmed down, and all the other employees were like GASP THEY ACTUALLY TOUCHED THE EVIL DANGEROUS SUPER EVIL MAN and protag was like 'i am 1% away from slapping the next bitch who insults this grandpa'. And it was super depressing cos once he'd calmed down he seemed to start forgetting that anything bad had ever happened?? And he was really panicking and scared cos he didnt understand why he was forgetting, and he knew he had to cling onto something important but he didnt know what. And then five minutes later he was back to haha cheerful nothing is wrong and i love doing my fun science in this room im never allowed to leave. And protagonist was crying the tears that this poor gramp wasnt allowed to cry :(

Also actually i think maybe he was a ghost AND an alien? Like he was a scientist who died in some sort of tragedy back when the aliens first invaded, but along the way he'd been infected so his body got back up as a twisted combination of human and inhuman. And this was something unique to him, like he just happened to have a genetic mutation in his blood that was totally undetectable in life but happened to mix unpredictably with this alien virus to turn him into a hybrid instead of just killing him. So the government was very interested in finding a way to replicate this and create new supersoldiers, as well as just taking advantage of this dude's confused mental state that granted him a unique understanding of alien tech that made him more effective than other scientists. And, of course, also made him easy to manipulate :(

And i also had a feeling that maybe his backstory was mixed up with Adventure dr eggman? Like here it seemed he had a daughter instead of a son, and she had a similar death to Maria Robotnik where she was assasinated by the government he worked for, and it tipped him over the edge. I think Maddiman-alien-scifi-dude originally died trying to save her from being used in some sort of experiment? Like she was already dying of a disease and thats why maddiman took this job to have access to powerful government technology to try and look for a cure. But when the whole alien apocolypse happened, the evil government decided to use her for experiments cos she was 'basically dead anyway'. Theyd just lie and tell maddiman she died of her illness. So this was how they found out that this particular family's bloodline had a mutation that let them form a viable hybrid with alien dna. They were turning this poor kid into a monster in the basement while lying to her dad about her being dead! And maddiman was about to commit suicide from having no reason to live anymore, with the hell of this apocolypse world and the false impression that his kid was already dead. But somehow monster-daughter sensed this or something and broke out of containment to try and save him, and when he saw her he was able to recognise her even in her twisted state. So when the soldiers gunned her down in front of him and fed him some lies about this not being his daughter, he just completely snapped. He tried in vain to fight back and take down as many of them as possible in revenge, but well he was just a simple round dad with no ability to fight a government. So he was unceremoniously executed along with his kid and they shoved the bodies back in the lab to continue testing. "Damn that overemotional science dad, he made us execute our most valable test subject! But at least this way we can analyze his corpse to see if the mutation is passed down on the patrilineal side." But at some point during the fight, monster-daughter's blood had splashed on her dad and gotten into his bloodstream. So the seemingly dead body suddenly got up out of the morgue and started sucking people's blood or something. And this led to the current situation where they have him locked up cos he's a valuable test subject but also hey he has 100% reason to kill all of us and we're screwed if he remembers his past. Also i think the computer AI thing was his subconcious attempt to recreate the personality of his daughter even if he couldnt remember she'd ever existed :(

Anyway at some point things escalated and there was this final showdown versus both the invading aliens and the evil governmebt guys. I think there was some corrupt greedy politician dude who stole maddiman's teleporter tech and sold us out to the aliens cos he wanted money and power or something. And probably predictably the aliens just threw him off a bridge after he gave them the thing, because seriously even this evil army thinks these government dudes are too evil!

So this big actiony event was happening and Maddiman was freaking out like 'no no no i cant leave the lab everyone wpuld be mad at me, i dont even know what its like outside this room' even when he was in the middle of being attacked by aliens. He was forced to face his repressed memories to survive, and he naturally had a massive fuckin freakout! And i think maybe when protagonist character was trying to protect him he accidentally lashed out with his powers and hurt them, and he was so horrified thinking another person he cared about was gonna die because of him. Protagonist was like 'dont worry gramps its just a scratch' but he'd already freaked out and run away into the battlefield to his heavily implied death.

BUT THEN at some sort of moment of dire need, he came back all powered up and re-memoried and was like 'i have every reason to despise humanity but im not gonna let more children die because of these damn corporate monsters (and also literal monsters which are infinately less scary)" And he did some sort of great sacrifice to save the protagonist at the cost of his own life, and it was super dramatic falling from a building into a lake of fire or something. While sobbing and smiling peacefully thinkibg "did i atone for my sins? Will i be able to see my family again?" As his smiling face sunk beneath the flames and the protagonist cried out into the abyss...

Aaaaand then i dont really know what happened in the big battle and i also never found out wtf the solution was to fixing the transporter thing or how the aliens invaded or any of the million plot points that were non gramp related.

I just remember that when we all saved the day and defeated the baddies we found that maddiman had actually survived and it was a big hugs reunion. He was like "OH YEAH i totally forgot i literally already died once and regenerated from it, and this was the entire start to my story. My bad!" *shrugs inexplicably not dead arms*

So yeah in summary im glad my brain summoned up a universe where my favourite sad granddad is literally immortal now, but also why did it torment him with an even sadder plot than his original one

#weird dream tag #the sequence with trying the teleporter curtain on different doors actually took up the majority of the dream #it was ridiculously long and i wish i could slap my brain and be like 'geez save some time for explaining gramp backstory more!'

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gammija · 6 years

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The Hollow review/summary/rant/explanation of why i hate the ending I wasn’t sure whether I should post this, but I did enjoy reading others experiences watching this show, so here’s mine under the cut. Edited from a convo with a friend.

(Obviously, spoilers!)

Me: Okay so to properly express my disappointment i gotta take you through the major beats

The show starts with three teens waking up in an almost empty room, finding out they all have amnesia. They quickly solve a puzzle to escape the room, and just as quickly Adam and Mira realize they have superpowers (superstrength/agility and some weird 'speak to animals/know all languages' hybrid, respectively. also she can breathe underwater and swim really fast. its kind of vague)

Kai is already clearly a comic relief, discount Ron (from HP, the movies, no idea about the books) so me and sister correctly predict he'll get jealous of adam and miras relationship (even if there is none), gets pissy and jealous that he has no powers, but then finds out he has powers anyway he does, hes a fire bender. cant say im not bitter about that cause id put my money on invulnerability but eh its alright he has red hair after all hes still fun

Friend: Of course he is

I just feel bad is all aldjs

Me: adam gets a throwaway line of 'maybe were dead' and kai never lets it go

this food might be poisoned but im starving and hey were dead anyway! right, adam

Friend: I love him??

Me: i loved him as soon as he spoke his first dumb words also he puns but basically hes the only interesting char; adam and mira are just cookie cutter 'male lead 1' and 'female lead 1' i mean, he’s cookie cutter ‘jealous 3rd wheel’ but that has more going on than the first two still servicable though

anyway so the jokes are sometimes fun, and superpowers are always my jam. but the REAL reason to keep watching is just, whats going on? ARE they dead? or in some kind of weird gvnmt experiment? some weird magical vampire guide (dont ask) hints they wanted this themselves ooh, intrigue. and the world is very very quirky they start in a gravity falls-y woods and then get teleported to a desert with minotaurs and witches, then get invited for tea by the Grim Reaper and the rest of the 4 horsemen of the apocalypse

tbh Grim is the best part of the show but thats neither here nor there

anyway they have a magic map that updates once theyve been somewhere, and it shows them that the hot dry desert and the swampy wood bunker are like right next to each other

so you start thinking, how are they gonna explain that? this is too weird to be handwaved away. theyve gotta be going somewhere

they visit some other exotic locals, like what appears to be the set of Alien (complete with alien) and an abandoned old fair and a floating island with japanese inspired evildoers on it

the weird magic guide keeps showing up and being vague, dropping hints that there are other kids there etc

at some point Mira says "This is no time for games!" Weirdy: "Thats where youd be wrong~" me and sister: Aha! videogame! that connects all the dots, and also makes the tropes clear: small world with all kinds of different areas, quests, fights, superpowers, an updating map, fast travel Adam, a few eps later: guis i think we might be in a videogame me and sister: [high five]

Anyway in the meantime also the second predictable Kai (discount Ron) plot happens: they meet three other kids (boy boy girl) and they act shady but the girl takes an immediate and obvious interest in Kai so obviously theyre gonna manipulate him and have him betray his friends but in the end he'll see through their facade and kick their ass that more or less happens. The other teens also confirm that this is a game, and theyre trying to win. winning is done by bringing the MacGuffin to a tree fights over macguffin ensue situations are dire but our characters persevere

(also Mira kisses Adam and he acts very weird about it, almost as if hes gay and the only reason they didnt make it canon is censors) (no lingering gaze, just him going 'hehe yeah no thanks, its not you, its me', but in a very... he doesnt seem to be saying it with shall we say burning desire in his soul. hes literally just like 'eh youre a good friend.' Cool move, cartoon that made the two main boys have arguments over nothing cause of course the two main guys have constant dick measuring matches)

this all is not the offensive part btw it was all fun and games, its just a flash cartoon i wasnt expecting Shakespeare

anyway so theyre in a videogame, and apparently thats the answer to all the weirdness. A bit of a cop-out, cause thats a very easy answer, but eh, it works. it wasnt immediately obvious.

also something i hadnt mentioned yet: thisd be ideal for making (self-insert) OCs. Unique powers for each person, there are clearly more characters than shown, the world is your playground

and maybe the video game thing could be interesting on its own in the last few eps the game seems to be glitching out a lot they say its breaking apart so they really gotta hurry now maybe they were beta testers for a vr game gone wrong maybe this is part of it but its like a huge experience that you tell all your friends about anyway there are ways it could be cool, could be expanded to a season 2 despite having solved the mystery

but. last episode. our heroes get the MacGuffin, go to a final stage, and fight the Boss Battle (its a dragon). they enter the Castle....

...and the screen zooms out, into a sudden live action stage, where we see the cartoon (literally what you were just watching) on screen. there are 6 chairs, 3 with our heroes, 3 with the other teens, presumably. theres a host and hes dressed exactly like the weird guy (and that was already kind of a clashy outfit in the cartoon). it was all just a game show. but. the worst part is the live action

you. dont. go. from. animated. to. live. action.

other way around? fine, can work. But now? WHY itd still be dumb and dissapointing but if itd been animated too itd at least have been.... nice to look at but the acting.. oh god they didnt even say anything and it was all wrong clearly theyd just picked the first random teens that vaguely looked like the chars and put them in there cause they had no lines so who needs acting?!

the enemy teams girl had, in the cartoon, pink hair. Purple with pink highlights instead of stylizing that into something more realistic or painting the actual hair, they gave some 30-year old woman a wig and called it a day

keep in mind i binged this show in one go

purposely stayed up late to watch the last ep with my sis even tho we shouldve gone to bed and were disobeying our dad cause we Had to Know

and theres more i said they had no lines but i was lying. Kai did have a line. well, his voice actor did they dubbed him also the line was about him having to pee which is already not the most hilarious in animated version but a live action kid whose supposed to be this character you spent 3 hours with but looks nothing like him saying that in a voice that doesnt belong to his throat, as he stands bashfully in front of a live audience, the only words spoken by your main characters in the last moments...

*its actual hell*

oh oh one more thing at the end the six kids stand in a line and kai is next to other girl they glance at each other and as the eyes of this teen and 30 year old in wig cross, her eye glitches for a moment

dun dun duuun

bUT i dont care anymore, The Hollow. You overestimated your own premise. this wont be forgiven. your most interesting part was the mystery, and the answer to that was "just a normal game show" (which also doesnt make sense on another level smh) soo if you think that im interested in what these two-dimensional (ha) characters will do now about the glitch in the eye of a bitch then i have news for u

i dont

...if they get a second season ill probably check it out though as long as its animated

Friend: Gammi I'm getting the real sinking suspicious feeling that what you saw isn't the real end but bad on purpose because there's more to it

Me: the show didnt seem good enough to be bad on purpose

and yet im still not done, if youll still hear me out

i mean, im an animation fan so ill still watch but if theyd wanted to be bad on purpose they really shouldve done a better job fleshing out the characters thats what people come back for that was a bit of a sidetrack BUT so i said why the live action itself was just terrible in overal quality

but the resolution that 'oh it was all in a game show' doesnt work on multiple levels

first of all, they show a short flashback of "About 5 hours earlier". The kids stand on the stage and are instructed to take their seats in the vr-chairs, and pick their superpower

2 things i dislike about that

1) there goes all the self-insert/oc potential. they werent teens in over their heads, they werent gvnmt experiments, or just some kids who wanted to play a game -they were in it to win it, from the start. thats very specific and not the most appealing to all kinds of characters (goodbye, all the 'im just an average girl whod never step into the spotlight like that' characters).

Also, all the expansion on lore is gone. maybe there were other games simultaneously? eh, maybe, but theyd be all gameshows. Maybe someone ended uo trapped there for way longer? nah its just a gameshow theyre not gonna let anything actually bad happen. Maybe there are other worlds, other areas, other weird creatures? unlikely, they finished the map and familiarity seemed to be a thing for the audience. Now every new idea has to be put not through a 'whats interesting for a player' but a 'whats interesting for a viewer' lens, and whats a selfinsert if not a player in another universe

2) HOW IS THIS A SUCCESSFUL GAME SHOW

who the hell watches a game show for 5 consecutive hours, some of which mustve been just them walking. also, we zoom out of the screen were watching, so implication is that everything up until then has been what the audience has seen. but... we only followed the one team. there were two? why didnt the audience want to see what they were up to? ~reality tv usually thrives on showinf the worst assholes so realistically they wouldve been the focus~

There are also way too many times *both* teams couldve failed, from early on till late in the game. Not a single game i can think of thats played for an audience is set up like that, and especially not a televised one (okay tbf idk if this was televised, i dont remember if i saw cameras, but. it mustve. monetary reasons.)

What r u gonna do if they all 'died' from the monsters in the first ep? Call it a day? boring for the audience. let them restart from scratch? boring for the audience. the existence of an audience messes with everything

AND THEN ANOTHER THING what do you mean, "5 hours ago?" you never get a time stamp to show how long theyve been in there but there are some cuts, when they travel and such. The actual show is a lil over 3 hours runtime. You mean to tell me you sat through 2 hours of the characters just walking?

okay last thing. so. they were clearly second season teasing with the glitching eye thing. i already said this but. theres nowhere to go from here that isnt worse that the first season. your mystery is dead. you clearly know your live action teens cant act so youd have to go back into the game - but why would they do that? how would that be in any way interesting? you explored all there was to explore.

The other, more out there option, is that as you said the 'real world' was a fake-out and theyre still in a game. but. how would- how would you even make that remotely convincing? if youd just left the 'real world' gameshow as animated too this wouldnt have been a problem. but there is absolutely no conceivable reason to justify, in universe, why another meta-level up is 2D animation again unless they were in a game, in a game, in a game. and thats just dumb. yall aint inception

Friend: HONESTLY if they just kept the whole deal animated it'd probably be okay. Not good, but better,

Me: ye me and my sister came to the same conclusion

i couldve lived with that. at least, i couldve just acknowledged the finales existence but chose to ignore it. now however im full phantom planet levels of denial. in fact i dont even know how the show ended anymore, suddenly

Friend: what finale? what show?

Me: also at least now we know why its called The Hollow

it leaves you feeling empty inside

#the hollow #the hollow netflix #netflix the hollow #uhm #text post #joos yaps #in case anyone was curious what ive been blogging about today #this is the show

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rigginsstreet · 7 years

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this got SUPER long so its going under the cut but this is the f*lice rant i was talking about lmao enjoy! (full disclosure i also end up going on a fredsythe rant because i gotta, ok. yall gonna make me sit through this stupid ass storyline when a better one is RIGHT FUCKING THERE so yeah, im mad. fp jones also likes men get over it.)

Sorry but there's literally nothing new inventive shocking or compelling about a storyline where two grown ass straight MARRIED adults are pining over each other because they had some weird romantic connection nearly 30 fucking years ago that may or may not have resulted in a fucking teenage pregnancy that im sure NOBODY wanted like yall really out here wanting me to believe what? alice cheated on her boyfriend and got knocked up by a dude who represented everything she was trying to get away from? and she told hal the kid was fps but never told fp himself? because that makes all of ZERO FUCKING SENSE! even if they wanted to throw out “well alice and hal were broken up at the time” its still SO out of character for alice like i know she had her wild child serpent days but its not something she looks back on with fondness so why the HELL does anyone think its a good idea to set her up with the fucking LEADER of the entire GANG are you all sniffing glue?? and then theyre trying to sit here and vilify hal so that we root for alice to hook up with fp in present day? the fuck outta here im not about to sit and cheer on alice’s character regression. first of all yall need to stop getting mad at 17 year old hal for not wanting to be a father and handling this situation poorly he was a TEENAGE BOY i know yall think everyone needs to be pristine angels from birth but thats not how life works and second of all he has every right to be sketched out that his daughter brought forth her long lost brother to fill in the void polly left, especially when the first time hal sees chic hes fucking BLEEDING after being attacked for god knows what reason in hals mind like... im team hal on this one he’s the only one with some self preservation alice and betty about to get themselves killed i s2g all these dumb ass decisions are being made, which in itself is bad enough, but to make it so obvious that this is all being done to eventually prop up a ship that is the very definition of fan service, is beyond ridiculous and terrible writing. like i get it. madchen and skeet are hot and have chemistry (which...btw....literally all the parents have insane chemistry with each other but no focus on the boring obvious straight pairing i guess but oh do not worry i have more to say on that later) i get it. but what is the purpose of that if you cant write an interesting story? and dont get me started on how shoehorned this recent ~connection~ is like yes i admit in s1 i got vibes from them (which, stay on this blog for 5 minutes and you will soon realize i can romantically/sexually connect pretty much any pairing amongst the parents because, like i said, they all have insane chemistry and they all say weird shit to each other). but i cannot believe yall sat here and thought the whole sexual frustration comment after fp got out of prison or the “leave him” exchange felt authentic??? like is it me? am i the one in the twilight zone? somebody help me out here. alice and fp in s1 couldnt stand each other and now shes all joking about his sex life ?? fp almost started a huge fight during that dinner with her and hal and the kids and yet im supposed to believe he’s been pining after her all these years?? like maybe id have an easier time believing this shit if i hadnt seen how he interacts with fred (oh yes. we’re going there because im tired of this HETERO NONSENSE GOING ON ALL THE TIME IN TELEVISION WHEN THEYVE LITERALLY SET UP BETTER OPPORTUNITIES FOR SAME SEX RELATIONSHIPS IM IN A MOOD SO WE’RE GOING ALL OUT) but to close off this part of my rant (oh and i didnt even touch upon how gross itd be for betty and jughead to share a sibling lmfao but that should be self explanatory): there is literally no conceivable way for this shit to go down and not make me lose respect for alice (fp i can give a slight pass to on the front of he and his wife being separate, but even then if he goes after alice while she’s still with hal....you done fucked up). first of all, going after your daughters boyfriends/ex boyfriends father is weird. second of all, if chic is in fact hals son, then they need to work on bringing the family together. hal is not a lost cause. chic is creepy as hell if anything i can see him pulling some shit that brings betty hal and alice closer together but no that makes too much sense so the writers probably wont do that! so theyre either gonna continue to push hal out so that itll be “acceptable” for alice to run to fp, or hal has to literally just fucking die and then what? alice goes to fp in her time of grief? im gonna throw up.

and now on to the gay shit

im supposed to compare f*lice and fredsythe scenes and come out thinking alice was the one he was in love with? bitch WHERE? fp has a sordid past with both alice and fred for different reasons. we dont know the full extent of what happened with alice (if anything but for the sake of predictability that i know to expect from a cw show, lets say they do) but given how they interact with each other we can assume it was bad. and we all know fred and fps history and how dark that got for fp (like i literally wrote up a whole thing about it if you want a link i’ll send it to you) and yet no matter the past, fp had probably his most lightest moment of the show with fred. he was willing to drop everything and help fred and soon as he asked (which, btw, fred didnt even ask for help. fp knew he was in trouble and that was it. thats all he needed and he was there for fred). THAT is love, ok. THAT is a relationship worth delving into beyond 2 friggen episodes in season 1. And yes this same storyline thats been given to f*lice with this whole adultery nonsense, but with fp and Fred, would actually be interesting because two gay kids in the early 90s actually have a valid reason for not being together and not ending up together. and then you add on that fps from the south side and fred the north, and that makes things even more complicated for them because then you can have a whole scenario of fp thinking hes not good enough for fred and ending things because of his own insecurities, his way of trying to push fred towards a better life... like THAT makes sense. even if fred and fp were never a thing and you just went with fp being in love with his best friend all these years and he could never have him (which still makes sense because i mean come on, freds casanova ways in high school with the ladies? fp sitting on the sidelines trying to be a supportive best friend but dying on the inside, never telling fred how he feels?) not to mention like half the serpents are gay as hell and there would be such a great story to tell for why all these gay south side kids end up in the same gang under fps wing, because he’s making up for his own shitty upbringing, he wants these kids to know someones looking out for them like...if the writers need plots and backstory I can give you them for free it really didn't take a lot of brainpower but no by all means tell me how the two ~straight~ kids who grew up on the same side of town under virtually the same circumstances, one of whom wanted NOTHING MORE THAN TO SHED HER SERPENT IMAGE AND CREATE A BETTER LIFE FOR HERSELF, and the other who keeps going on about wanting to put his family back together, had such a tragic backstory and its not just a blatant midlife crisis on both their ends. please. by all means. enlighten me. 😒

#i hate bad tv writing lmao like bruh...#BISEXUAL FP JONES BEING IN LOVE WITH HIS BEST FRIEND FOR DECADES MAKES MORE SENSE THAN STRAIGHT FP JONES CHASING AFTER A MARRIED WOMAN #THANKS FOR COMING TO MY TEDTALK !#bewareoftrips #kxvinkeller #i know you guys wanted the rant lol

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tw0tiem · 4 years

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week 2.1

i decided itd be easier if i wrote the plotline for the storyline on a different post so here it is :)

Kei and Leon(working names) has been dating for 2 years and are each other’s high school sweetheart.

The couple spent their last summer together and as the summer seems to end, they had a huge fight that ended them up in breaking up and hurting each others. There were so many things Leon wished he could say and done to prevent the break up. He knew there were things he could have done but he never gained enough courage for it. Would you, the reader be able to show him the courage he needed to help save their relationship?

There will be 5 intractable photographs and another 5 more photographs that are not intractable. Each photograph contains a certain red flag/a reason why she felt distant from him and not enough. These are the few topics that the photographs/memories will touch on:

- communication is key / being understanding

Sometimes we have to compromise with your partner’‘s emotions. A subtle little validation for their feelings mighe be enough to put them in a better mode sometimes.

- dont be a put-down artist.

Although sugarcoating isn’‘t good either, being too honest sometimes hurt. Try to follow the 5 minute rule, if its something that cant be changed in 5 minutes, it shouldnt be said. Furthermore, like your partner for who they are, forcing them to become the ideal way partner you want may seem manipulative. A person would change if both sides feel like its for the better, not because only one of them likes it that way.

- Clinging vs controlling

Understanding the line inbetween it, everyone would love some attention sometimes. Making your partner the no1 priority is always the best choice but not when theres major events happening or either when you just need some alone time to balance life out. Forcing your partner to meet them despite saying that your busy on that day and then even threatening them after they said no? Sounds pretty controlling.

“ if it doesn’t feel right, it’s not right. No matter what, if you feel suffocated by even slightly clingy behavior, it may be time to re-evaluate your relationship. “

- the languages of love

the 5 languages of love; words of affirmation,quality time,giving gifts,acts of service,physical touch. Find the best one that works with your partner. Remembering what your partner likes more is a start. (like knowing common things about them- their favorite colour, food, etc)

“I remember she likes..”

- communications again / Trust issues

This rule doesnt apply just to partners, but to everyone. Apologize to your mistakes after learning that your the one actually in the wrong after being educated about it.

“ • Lying. • If they’ve cheated more than once. I know for a fact people make mistakes and a cheater can change, but if they just keep doing it with every single relationship that’s different. • Saying you’re crazy if you get reasonably upset about something. • Refusing to respect any boundaries you set. • Saying all of their exes are horrible. Sometimes people do have a bad streak but sometimes people don’t take responsibility for their own actions in a relationship. • Being jealous or controlling • Trying to be who they think you want instead of themselves “

working summary 1:

a journal/storybook with photographs inside about a couple who has broken up, the photographs are scannable AR memories - each memory have an individual storyline of how the one of them have hurt each other and you, the player whos looking at the memory can change the course of the storyline by giving them something they wished they had given each other during that time.

The objects will be physical objects and will be hidden in the same pages or around the book, wishing they could change the course of their relationship

working summary 2:

This project uses an interactive AR storybook to tell the tale of a modern day couple who spent their whole summer together. On the final day of the summer, the couple broke up because they found themselves not being able to communicate to each other anymore. This storybook journal is about a boy reminiscing his summer with his ex-girlfriend using the pictures they had photographed together throughout the entire summer. Each photograph contains a different memory, mostly bad memories. Scanning each photograph memory through the AR app allows the user to witness what happened during that moment, through a small 2d animation video. Using this journal, the boy reflects himself, hoping what he could have done better and should have done during that moment rather than what he actually did, maybe hoping they wouldn’t have broken up by the end of summer?

The user, which is the audience would be able to help change the fate of the boy by helping him throughout each memory by giving him the object he wished he could have given or should have said instead of what he did during that moment. The objects or bubble text words will be hidden around the same page of the book, making users find for where he had hid the object. Using them, it could change the course of the storyline and fate of the young couple.

case studies biblio:

relationship red flags

https://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/love-sex/dating-bad-signs-warning-red-flags-new-relationship-love-sex-a8178586.html

https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/1j9w5z/what_are_some_subtle_relationship_red_flags_that/

https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/7y84uu/what_are_some_big_red_flags_in_a_new_relationship/

https://www.healthscopemag.com/health-scope/toxic-relationships/

https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/52gphf/what_are_some_subtle_relationship_red_flags_that/d7k4k7y/ ***

#week 2

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worldprincessp2 · 8 years

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omg im so sorry if youre on mobile. this is so long but i wanted to let my feelings out and yeah. sorry sorry sorry ignore if you want but also read too cuz i need comfort if u wanna give any

this entire past week has been....super...destructing and a blow to my own self esteem...

so i moved in to my college dorm sunday. seemed okay. i thought itd be more cheerful and id have people introduce themselves to me but apparently not so...but i didnt mind. my roommate didnt arrive till 9 almost and by then i felt really alone like wow. theres no one here. no family. no friends. nothing.

then the next day i went out and it was nice. i explored campuses...rode busses...stuff like that. it seemed like it would be a good start. i went back to my room and felt content with everything. i thought i had a good schedule. i thought i had everything planned out correctly. i thought my money’s worth (a lot of money too) would be going to something good and beneficial not only for me but for my career.

and then the next day happened.

i had my first psych class. it was neuropsychology. professor seemed like a bitch cuz she judged me based on me being a new transfer student who also came from a community college! awesome. so i immediately felt like shit plus i had to stay in the same auditorium (which i HATED) and i waited for my psychological themes in film class to start. i thought it’d be nice. i didn’t expect it to be set in an auditorium, more like reserved classroom with a projector, along with a professor who wore a microphone and talked to us like she was selling something.

and more and more people filled the room and sat down and people sat with their friends and socialized with each other. and because i’m really fucking brand new i knew nobody. i was Alone. the definition of alone. and then my anxiety spiked up and the tiny bouts of depression began settling in. oh yeah. this reminds me of something.

(senior year of high school - the year my depression peaked.)

class started and i began to feel tears in my eyes. i kept looking at another university i had applied to and looked at their major checklist and felt...what i was doing was stupid. how is this going to help me in the long run? sure it’s fun but is fun even worth it if you want money. or enough money to become stable?

class ended and i left the auditorium and saw so many people talking and going about their way. i went on the bus. went home. wanted to burst out crying but didn’t cause that’s embarrassing. and i ran to my room and cried. i literally just cried. i was in panic mode because maybe this wasn’t what i wanted. i had tried it and seen a taste of what was to come and i hated it.

i sent so many texts to my friends and so many of them have said it’s just your first day, give it time, you have no idea what life will be like. and maybe they’re right. but i can’t even imagine wasting that much money on something i’m not comfortable in spending on. and if i wanted to go back home after this semester, it would’ve been for what...nothing. i felt so stupid and hopeless.

i emailed the other university and they replied back to me - and even called me - and said i could come back and get started as soon as possible. i said okay, let me talk to several people here first - like a general advisor and a psychology advisor. well the general advising sucked. i wanted to tell them i had issues and was thinking of going back home and all this other shit i’m dealing with but no, i enter the office and i ask to see an advisor and the lady just raised her eyebrows and said nothing, and i repeated my question and she just motioned to her nametag which said director like excuse fucking me for not seeing that, i’m literally in a crisis mode. fuck you and your nonexistent eyebrows.

so she looked at my schedule and said it was basically shitty. so i mean. i’m confuzzled. she was like pick a minor. i said i don’t know what minor to be in. she said it doesn’t matter. i said it kind of has to relate to your major right? she said no not really. i said okay then what do you recommend. she said well. sociology and public health? well fuck man. this wouldve been so much better if i had done this earlier, like, maybe, A WEEK AGO? oh but no, this university has so many fucking students that it can’t even properly register you for classes cuz theres not enough deans in the world. also spring semester transfers? don’t be one. youll be screwed.

so i was like i’ll do this tomorrow or later today. i also emailed my psychology advisor. he was no help. i even talked to him the day i registered and i should’ve known by then but i wanted to keep an open mind. i really wanted to believe that this was good for me. i asked him what courses is better for me and he generally said well, no one’s had trouble with what is on your schedule. OMG. OF COURSE. BECAUSE THEY’RE USED TO THE 4-YEAR UNIVERSITY/COLLEGE DIFFICULTY LEVEL. I’M NOT. HELP ME.

and i left it at that. i told him i maybe wanted to be a therapist and he said well this class sounds good. oh yeah. just this ONE class. thanks.

at that point i really...didn’t feel anything anymore. i went to my students in transition class and felt like hey, this should be good huh, because these people are just like me!!!!

turns out i was wrong...most of them commute. most of them already know one another. the instructor herself dragged the class and how worthwhile it is. she was like trust me, if i were you, i wouldnt wanna take this class either but it’s mandatory so. nice. we had icebreaker questions and at that point i thought it’d be okay. turns out i was wrong again. it felt weird and even more awkward than the beginning of class. this girl i interviewed looked friendly but do you ever get that feeling like someone just finds you unappealing and generally unpleasant? yeah i got that vibe from her. we didn’t even make small talk. she like refused. i even tried to be outgoing like “is anyone here psych majors? :)” and i got no response. she turned around once we were finished interviewing each other and talked to her friend. i was just sitting there, alone, staring at my paper cuz. well.

i left and i didn’t even feel good from that moment. i thought that class would help but no. it only made me feel more alienated. so i went to my next class in a campus thats so far away and stayed in the building it was in for an hour and researched on my other university in mind and felt relieved they had what i wanted. you might be thinking well michelle you should’ve done this sooner. GIRL I KNOW. BUT THEY DIDNT EVEN HAVE WHAT I WANTED DURING THE SPRING WHEN I VISITED THEIR CAMPUS. IT JUST RECENTLY GOT ADDED.

so at that point i was at a crossroads. i could leave if i wanted to and go home. or stay and tough it out, deal with things, and there we go. look i’m not an extrovert. i’m extremely shy and quiet when things are brand new. it’s because of my anxiety. i can’t help it. it’s just hard. no one can really relate to what i’m going through because they either go to uni as a freshman and meet other scared people or they have friends in most of their classes. or they don’t have to deal with that anxiety because their classroom is small and it’s easier to be more open. i know i do so well in that setting. it’s what i loved community college.

i also know my depression/anxiety can flare up and hinder my abilities to do well in school. it’s happened once before. it can happen again. i can’t afford to let it happen again. so i won’t...i’m coming back home soon and am in the process of withdrawing. i wanted to give this school more time. i was so excited in leaving home and to be honest, i’m not homesick. that’s not the issue. the issue is being confident my money is going to something that’s beneficial for my education and my happiness. and all i’ve been feeling here is fear. nervousness. unhappiness. worry. being away from home is not the issue. it is about making sure i’m making a SMART decision. and i know i’m not.

then my cousin messaged me yesterday and called me immediately after i told her i’m leaving this uni and she was just super sad and wanted me to think about it before i make a solid decision. i said it’s not for me. she said you don’t know that yet. i said i kind of know, i have a gut feeling, and usually that feeling is right. she said well maybe try it for a week. i said i can’t afford to do that. my money won’t get refunded. she said well i want you to be happy. i said i don’t even know if what i want to do will make me happy. she said that’s the most important thing though. i said money will also make me happy too. she said it’s not always about the money. i said maybe it is. that’s what gives me most stress. i’m not lucky to have a full-ride somewhere. i don’t have that advantage.

so i slept and i felt weird today waking up. a part of me, though it’s small, wants to see where this leads. and then a bigger part of me thinks this wouldn’t be right. i am not confident and no one should go forward with shaky feet.

my cousin called me this morning after i told her that. she passed me to her boyfriend and he said you shouldn’t leave. you should stay. i cried cuz there’s validity in that. but i just cannot afford it. the money aspect is huge to me. it should be huge to anyone. it is not a light subject. and i told him that. he said that’s true. and my cousin knew what my dreams are cuz i told her yesterday i would love to do something creative with my life. and she said do it! don’t do something that would make you unhappy.

so...she told me that again today. and her boyfriend was so nice and even said you can come up here and live with us and you can go to school here. it’s exactly what you want. it was a lot to take in.

all i know is i can’t stay where i’m currently at right now. it’s taken a toll on me and i’m even surprised i’m not breaking out with pimples and shit. all i know is i’m not homesick. i don’t particularly miss anyone. i’m fine living alone. it’s what i prefer to be honest. but that shouldn’t be the reason i’m spending my money. cuz it’s a lot. i think if i stay home, stay in my routine, where it’s less of a big shock, and i’m familiar with where i’m going then all is good. right now i just can’t handle that shock. i can’t let it affect my grades. i can’t. and i’ll find ways to get internships or whatever because it’s about looking for it and not having things handed to you...

ANYWAY. i feel so much guilt over what i’ve put my parents through. i know my mom is mad at me but she won’t let it show. my dad wants me to be happy. my sister too. and i appreciate that. it still won’t take the guilt away. my roommate has been so great...she doesn’t get where i’m coming from but she understands if i do leave. she wants me to stay though. i just can’t. :/

i wanted to let this all out on my blog so here ya go. maybe you found this interesting. or maybe u think i’m dumb. lol i don’t really care. i just needed to know if this would be a good match. and now that i’m here it’s not. so. there’s that. shit happens. thanks for reading and if you wanna give me words of comfort please do cuzzzzzz i needs it

ok..........bye yall

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tumblunni · 6 years

Text

AAAAGH internet

Cmon maaaaan give me a breaaaaak

Im STILL wasting loads of money on mobile internet cos this is TWICE ive called them and they said theyd send a repairman and ive waited abd then no repairman and i call them and they say "nope no record of booking a repairman here"

This is now my THIRD ATTEMPT and its been a week and im officially 100% broke thanks to this

And i barely even have any mobile internet left and i dont have any more money to buy more until the 25th aaaaagh! I KNEW it was bad to do something for my birthday, i knew i should have just stayed at home like a sad sack and saved the money just in case...

AUUUUUGHHHHH

And now i just found out i dont have anyone giving me a lift to the Integrated Autism Team meeting on wednesday and i cant afford a taxi and itd be SO STRESSFUL on the bus because its like three buses to a place ive never been before and then a mile long walk thru twists and turns to find this place and GAHH i wouldnt eveb have taxi money in case i get lost AND my mobile data will probably be gone by then so i cant even use goog maps...

And ive asked to borrow money from my friends SO MANY TIMES LATELY so i'd feel so awful doing it again! And i havent even paid back the last 15 bucks a friend gave me for that stupid situation where i got lost at 2am and needed a taxi home.

aAAAAAAGH

But on the 25th i get my Big Main Monthly Payment and hopefully all this shit will be sorted by then so i wont have any more Huge Spending Out Of Nowhere Moments and i can just finally pay everyone back! Like man i cant even give u guys fanart as thanks cos no internet means i can only badly photograph stuff on my phone and i cant give you a Big Cool Coloured Version

But aaaaagh at least i accomplished a one thing today i guess?? I talked to the Scary New Support Workers and they turned out to be Really Nice Actually. A team called FORT which stands for something something THERAPY probably maybe. There were two of them and they were Super Cool Young Doods named Bryony and Evan. And it was stressful having to talk in big detail about my childhood abuse AGAIN and my ptsd AGAIN to new people who needed to ask EVEN MORE invasive questions. But they were just SO nice about it! They straight up actually asked my gender pronouns and were supportive when i explained it to them and just aaaaaa *sigh of relief so huge i straight up melt into atoms and blow away on the wind*

I like.. Actually got to talk to them about how it added a huge extra level of stress at park road that people were really inconsiderate and quite prying about my LGBTness ans such. And how absolutely great it is to meet some medical professionals who care about being welcoming to diverse patients! Like i absolutely understand people not understanding my gender, i mean i am a minority within a minority after all. But god its so refreshing to just be able to..like..explain it rather than defend it? I dont have to "prove" it exists?? Constantly with different people every day?? And be told that its too difficult for them to remember?? Just getting basic levels of consideration was so great and i feel so much more able to trust them.

Also Bryony had really cool style like the sort of "librarian chic" i always aim for. And she was the main support worker while Evan was her assistant so i didnt talk to him much, but he's a Cool Gamer Dude and we had a fun small chat about how the Ps4 is a terrible beast machine that chugs along with train noises that almost block out the game XD and he was wearing a cool vault tec company logo thing and is excited about the new fallout, so yay! Neither of them play pokemon but they listened to me babble about how the new game lets you give pikachu LITTLE HAIRCUTS and Bryony was like "wow technology has come so far" and i think i actually got her a little interested in getting back into the series, haha? Anyway it was just nice to end a stressful conversation about illness and trauma with a few gaming babbles, lol.

Still have a huge stress headache tho and i wish this wasnt so early in the morning cos now its kinda left me exhausted before the day's even begun. But i feel proud that i was able to do the stressful THIRD TIME CALLING THE DAMN INTERNET GUYS right after this other stressful thing! Tho i did manage to handle it but i think maybe it was too much at once and thats why the big headache. Hope these pain meds kick in soon! I need to finally have my late breakfast cos maybe having them on an empty stomach is why theyre so slow? I aint know science!

So umm yeah that went mostly okay and im hopeful that these new support workers will be good because they said theyre focused more on extracurricular activities like classes and voluntary work and social groups to meet other people with similar mental illness. They left me a few leaflets to look through so hopefully i can understand it all a bit more then? But i feel proud of myself cos it wasnt too long ago that i was too scared to have meetings with anyone inside my own living room, and now ive done it a grand total of twice! And also spoken to annoying tech support on the most stressful phone conversation three wholee times! Just..please dont make it four ok...

Ok now bunni go lie down again. Instead of making breakfast. Because seriously this day has already felt too long and its only been two hours...

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