#i hate him so much how can he smile and ruin my life lmao

[retroellie]

Polluted

Summary: After a long day of work, Spencer comes home and fucks his stresses away.

A/N: This was written in literally 45 minutes but I had this idea and I couldn't make it into a full fic, my mind could only think of the smut part lmao. Enjoy!!! :)

Warnings: NSFW, slapping, degradation, squirting, unprotected sex, mean!spencer

Word count: 1.9K

Prison changed Spencer Reid, plain and simple. This is not the man you came to love. He was cruel, possessive, completely and utterly damaged. You hoped that prison wouldn't taint Spencer too much, you hoped that he would continue to be sweet little Dr. Spencer Reid. But you knew what prison could do to a person, for you locked people up daily. You knew that the system would take Spencer's old soul and soft heart into its muddy hands, squeezing them until they became one. Although sometimes in the right lighting, in the right moment, you can see a hint of Spencer in his light brown eyes.

You can't say that you hated the change in Spencer, obviously there was much work to be done before Spencer could truly be himself again. However, you could live with this change. He was hungry, feeling as though your body was the only thing that could fill that hunger. It was extremely attractive to you, his sudden hunger for you. Spencer was always using you, using your body or your mouth or your hands... just you. There was always an excuse for him to be inside of you in his mind. A man thought of looking at you? He bent you over the kitchen table. You wore a shirt that showed a bit of your chest? He dragged you into the bathroom and forced you onto your knees. You smiled at him? He would shove his face between your thighs until you couldn't even see straight.

Even on the way back home after he had gotten out of prison, he bent you over the backseat on the side of the road and fucked you roughly. It felt like you were stepping on eggshells every time around him because you never know what can set him off... it was oddly scandalous, almost arousing as the thought of how he'd fuck you next was always on your mind. A big plus was that spencer dug himself into your brain, pulling out your deepest and darkest kinks, and using them to give you earth-shattering, mind-blowing, life-changing orgasms. Now you don't think you two could ever go back to just plain sex. He had ruined you, ruined your body so much that only the thought of being hurt could get you off now.

"Fucking bitch..." Spencer spat out, his hand spreading your legs further open as his cock drilled into your soaked cunt. "That bitch looked at me like I was fucking stupid..."

His words came out breathy and jagged as he fucked into you at an animalistic pace. Spencer came home today upset, his tie being ripped off and thrown down as soon as he got into the door. You knew something was up by this action, but also the look on his face. He seemed to have a frown sewn onto his face, something that he wore most days. You asked what was wrong but you were met with him ripping off your clothes, hinting that he didn't want to talk but to fuck his frustrations into you. Now here you were, panties ripped off, legs wide open, Spencer deep inside you with his hand placed on your neck.

You couldn't tell how many times you came just in this position alone, you couldn't keep count. His hand gripped your through, affecting the way your brain functioned. You felt with every thrust of Spencer's hips you would lose brain cells... creating the dumb cock whore that Spencer ached to achieve. Spencer's hand applied more pressure to your throat as he thought of what happened at work, how while section chief Erin Strauss critiqued his work, people were being murdered.

"As if my 187 IQ wasn't enough for her." He started, his hand on your thigh being slammed down past your face and into the wooden table he was drilling you into. " I mean, I've been at this place for over 10 years... I know what I'm fucking doing"

You came again, not able to keep yourself from unraveling now. His hand on your throat was constricting your moans, completely silencing them as the only thing that could come out of your mouth was soft gurgles. You loved this feeling, knowing that at any moment if you didn't like it you could alert Spencer and he'd stop immediately. I guess you could say that Spencer's care for you never disappeared after prison, he would go on to say that it strengthened his love for you. He had this picture of you that you had sent him in one of your many letters, he kept it with him everywhere he went for it was the only thing that kept him sane.

One time a fellow inmate saw it, snatched it from him, and digested every single inch of you. He went on to explain the disgusting things he would do to you if he got the chance, that is exactly why Spencer came home to fuck you nice and good every night. Because if he wasn't the one to do it, he knew that other people would take you for granted, they would spend only minutes with you... ignoring what you needed and taking what they wanted. You would feel incomplete, unsatisfied, and completely in denial that love existed. You would assume love was only made for books and movies, that no one could show you the love you deserved. This is the love you deserve. You deserve a love that could have you coming undone over and over again, a harsh and mean kind of love but that always ended with soft kisses and a nice hot bath. A love that was sour at first but ended sweet, making sure that the words "i love you" were carved onto your skin.

"You wouldn't do that would you?" He whispered into your ear, his grip on your throat as he waited for your response. " You don't think I'm stupid ...hmm?"

His cock was too deep inside you, it was deep enough to have you going cross-eyed and unable to speak. Your moans became audible now, no longer being stuck in your throat due to his pressure being released. His pace was still inhumanly fast, not stopping even for a second. The table had started to shit forward, being scrapped across the floor and probably worrying the downstairs neighbors. You were on the verge of cumming again, your mind not even able to comprehend his question until you felt a harsh sting on your cheek. Spencer had slapped you across the face, growing impatient while waiting for your answer.

"Answer me...." He hissed out, leaning down and taking his lips to yours. He bit down on your lip, creating a pain that shot through your body. "Or I'm going to make you cum over and over and over again until you can't think of anything else besides my cock deep inside your tight little pussy..."

You could taste blood now, your lip bleeding and seeping into your mouth. His words created this deep, rough knot in your stomach. It wasn't like the rest of the orgasms you had tonight, no it was more intense. It hurt, painful with every thrust of his cock. It created a deep pain and pleasure dynamic in your body but felt like something was trying to claw itself out of your body.

"Fuck..." You screamed out, grabbing onto him and digging your fingernails into his back. "No I wouldn't! Fuck... I wouldn't! I won't!"

You finally replied, hoping with those words he would deepen his thrust if that was even possible. Spencer just grinned down at you, placing his head in between your shoulder blade and your neck. He set soft kisses to the skin, his warm lips against your burning skin. Spencer was close, your words pushing him further to the edge. The feeling inside your stomach didn't stop or dull, it only got worse. You were screaming now, Spencer's hand lingering on your neck but sitting gently on your skin. Spencer picked up his speed, the table scraping against the floor even harder.

You couldn't handle it, everything around you becoming so far away yet being so close. The feeling got to a point of feeling terrifyingly painful but also so potent of pleasure and so bewitching that you didn't want it to end now. A couple more of Spencer's deep and harsh thrusts sent you over the edge, the painful knot in your stomach snapping and shooting liquid out of your body. It was the first time you had ever squirted, the feeling so glorious that you wished it would happen every time. Your vision went out, only seeing light and hearing Spencer's soft moans as he finished inside of you. The world felt like it ended, nothing to be seen or to be experienced... just emptiness but complete fullness all at the same time.

"Good girl..." You heard Spencer's words echo through your now-empty mind. You couldn't tell if your eyes were closed or not. "You did so good for me honey... I'm so proud of you."

Those single words were all you needed to hear as you floated back to earth and into your body, you blinked a couple times... forgetting where and who you were for a split second. You came back to see Spencer brushing your hair back from your sweaty face, his face inches from yours as his face filled with concern that maybe he had broken you finally.

"There she is..." He chuckled softly, kissing your lips softly. " There's my girl..."

You gave him a weak smile, raise your hand to rest on his cheek. You rubbed it softly, feeling the growing stubble on his face. He was just as sweaty as you, his body hot to the touch. You two probably looked insane, one of you barely able to walk looking beat the hell up and the other one scratched up and drenched with liquids. Spencer gently slid himself out of you, watching you wince softly as it felt like he was connected to you at this point.

"Sorry..." He whispered, taking your hand in his as he rubbed your thigh gently "I was too rough huh?"

Rough was not even close to what Spencer was. He was brutal, sadistic, barbaric but you couldn't deny that you would choose it over compassion any day. You began to think that maybe prison was the best thing that could've happened to Spencer Reid, not only was he a genius but he now had a powerful glow to him. Shy kisses and longing gazes were a thing of the past for you two, Spencer knew what he wanted and he was going to get it.

"You were just rough enough..." I chuckled, feeling nothing but content and at peace in this moment.

Spencer laughed with you, pecking your lips one last time before pulling away from you. He looked around, his eyes landing on the couch. He smiled, walking over and leaving you but only for a second. He came back with a blanket, wrapping it around you then picking you up bridal style. You thanked him silently because you knew there was no way you were getting off the table without some kind of help.

"To the bath you go..." He joked, holding you close to him as he walked you to your shared bathroom. 

You looked into his eyes and at the right lighting, the right moment, you looked into his light brown eyes... realizing that this is Spencer Reid. This is Spencer Reid damaged, polluted, and bruised... but it was still the man you fell in love with all those years ago.

[psychwxrdd]

could you write for dark!donnie with a corruption kink?? i’m so in love with him 😞

omggg me too babe 😭 i'd let him ruin my life tbh

corruption

🎀 warnings: 18+, corruption kink, innocence kink, dark! donnie, bimbo! reader, gaslight, rough sex, dub con, i could put a few more but just be aware that this is really filthy lmao i got way too excited while writing

donnie and you were dating for almost 6 months, and it was all going extremely fine. he was anything you always wanted in a boyfriend, he was protective, loving, treated you like a princess, was totally and completely obsessed with you. anyone knew better than to even stare at your direction cause they knew how donnie would react when the topic was you.

yet, you guys haven't had sex yet. you were still a virgin, not sure if you were ready to take a bigger step, and you were both only 18. it wasn't like you had a mature view of anything, needless to say, sex. donnie also told you several times that he would wait as much as it needed, because he didn't wanted his little girl to lose her purity. but that was what he told you.

it wasn't what he thought, tho. donnie had so many dirty, terrible thoughts about you. he was always trying not to get hard but you were constantly on his mind, teasing him. he wanted nothing more than to turn you into his own slut. he wanted to hear your sweet voice telling him the dirtiest things he could think of. he wanted you to feel desperated for him. and he decided he would have his dreams to come true.

"my day really sucked" you said, laying in your boyfriend's bed while he was searching for the dvd of an horror movie. it was friday night, it was halloween week and you were both not in the mood to go to any party, donnie said he much rather spend with you than in a "loud ass party full of assholes".

"yeah?" he stared at you, with a concerned expression. "was it anything in particular?"

"not at all, i was just really sad. couldn't wait to leave school" you spoke softly. donnie then stopped what he was doing to come sit by your side in bed, placing your head on his lap to give you a forehead kiss. "so glad i'm here with you now"

donnie smiled, you could see his eyes brighten with those words. he caressed your hair and your face, his fingers moving to your cheeks and jaw. "i'm glad you're here too, baby. i really wish you could be by my side all the time... i don't hear or see frank when i'm around you."

his fingers then went to your lips, pressing softly, and you didn't knew why, but you felt like opening your mouth in that moment. it was just intimate.

"but i do hear these...these voices in my head, that i-" donnie stopped for a moment and you stares at him, seeing his eyebrows frowning "i hear these voices telling me i should hurt you, baby."

you frozed slightly, not sure if you heard him correctly. "what do you mean, don?"

he sighed, looking sad. "i hear these voices telling me i should hurt the ones i love... that the only way i could stop something bad from happening to me is...to make something bad happen to a loved one instead."

he covered his face with both hands, as if he wanted to hide tears. you felt your heart so broken in that moment, you hated to see him suffering like this. you wish this could happen to you instead.

"baby..." you sat, in the middle of his legs, putting hours hands on his arms. "this is not your fault. really"

he looked at you with those puppy eyes you loved so much.

"is there something i could do to help you?" you asked, worried. donnie seemed to think for a while.

"maybe if i... if i did something bad to you, that you consented me to." he placed your hair behind your ears. you were curious about it, but you felt happy you could help him somehow.

"you have something in mind? i mean... you can give me a pinch, just not too hard"

he chuckled at your words. "i have an idea, actually. what do you think about giving me consent to ruin you?" he said with a slight grin, and you didn't knew how to respond. how would he even ruin you? was sex that sinfull?

you stayed quiet for a few seconds, avoiding eye contact with him, but he grabbed your chin softly, making you stare at his eyes.

"hey, it's okay baby... i promise i'll make you feel really good. and if you don't like it we can stop, huh?" he pressed a few kisses around your face, holding it with both hands. "but then i'll keep having these horrible thoughts, and i'll have to find a way to make something worse."

his words were awfull, but his voice was so sweet...it didn't sound like a threat to you. donnie would never hurt you, right? he promised that a thousand times. you trusted him.

"ok." you said almost in a whisper. his eyes widened a bit.

"ok? yeah? right now?"

"yeah don... i want you to feel better. you can do it to me."

he smiled big, so big. you loved his smile, so you smiled as well. he waste no time to give you a passionate, loving kiss.

he rolled you two on bed, him being on top of you. the passionate kiss didn't take long to become sloppy and hot. his hands that were just holding your face minutes before, were now holding your neck, not tight enough to choke, but enough to make you feel the pressure and gasp a bit for air.

his tongue felt so good against yours, kissing him like that... it made you feel things that you were ashamed to say out loud. felt likes butterflies all over your stomach, but lower, and better.

you wanted to let out a sound, to say his name, but you didn't.

he let go of your throat to move his hands all over your body, much different from you, he didn't seemed to feel ashamed about his own needs.

"you're so fucking sexy" he told you as he roughly took your shirt off "had to jerk off so many times just by imagining these boobs on my mouth"

he then put your bra down and quickly sucked your nipples, making you close your eyes and whimper. that felt extremely good.

donnie made pretty loud noises while sucking on your tits, you were worried that someone else would might hear it and ask what was it. but he didn't, not in the slightest.

"don-"

he grabbed your throat all of sudden, making you gasp, scared.

"shut the fuck up, baby, you talk when i ask you something" he made an intense eye contact, know you knew that he wasn't playing. his blue eyes looked pretty more dark, it was scary. "come here, get on your knees."

you felt scared of what he would do if you didn't, but at the same time, that fear turned you on. you did as he told, hearing the sound of him unzipping his pants.

"look so fucking gorgeous like this..." he could groan at the sight of you in your knees for him, so close to his cock. as he pull out, your eyes grow big at his size.

you didn't said anything tho, remembering you were supposed to stay quiet unless spoken to.

"open that pretty mouth f'me"

opening up as wide as you could, he caressed your chin. "thats my good girl"

he shoved his tip inside your lips and groaned, he wanted to be nice cause he loved you, but there was no way he could held himself back. what a pity.

donnie's cock hitted the back of your throat and you gagged so hard you thought you would throw up, but you didn't. your eyes were full of tears.

"shhh, it's okay baby. breath through your nose, fine?" you nodded slightly, saliva and tears running all over your face already. donnie loved how even your gag sounded lovely, he wanted to get you to make more of these.

he fucked your mouth harshly, and you would be lying if you say you weren't enjoying. it was uncomfortable, but so hot at the same time. so hot that you started moaning.

"like sucking my dick?" he asked, slapping your cheek softly, staring at your pretty eyes full of tears and lust. he couldn't hold any longer. "shit, fucking slut"

he came deeply inside your throat, and you had no choice other than to swallow. you didn't liked how it tasted, you wanted to spit it.

when donnie noticed it, he held your cheeks tightly "uh uh, swallow all of it"

tears were still falling, but you did as he told you. "good girl."

donnie carried you on his arms, placing you roughly on his bed, ass up and face down. "fucking nice ass, goddamn it"

he grabbed and slapped your ass, stroking his cock. he caressed his fingers on your clit to make sure you were wet enough.

"i wanted to eat that soaked pussy but my dick is still too hard right now honey, have to break you"

you were ready for the pain, considering you were still a virgin and he was fucking big, but as he put it inside, you could tolerate it.

"go slow, donnie" you searched for his body, placing your hand on his chest, and he held your hand sweetly.

"won't move till you tell me to"

you breathed, feeling so horny... you wanted him to move, but at the same time, you knew if he did that in that second it would make you feel a lot of pain.

donnie, behind you, were controlling himself in the best way he could to not rail the shit out of you. he wanted to corrupt you, and he wanted you to feel pain, but in a way that it would have you begging for more, screaming his name and turning into a slut. he didn't wanted it to hurt in a bad way.

a few more minutes and you were telling him to move, as it started to feel really good. donnie groaned when he hitted all his way inside you, feeling like this was the closest he would ever be to heaven.

"oh my god... move, donnie, please" you moaned in a desperated, slutty tone, and that was it for him. he started fucking you as if there was no tomorrow.

he rammed your head against his pillow and held your hair and throat, going harder and harder in each thrust. you were moaning, whimpering, crying, almost screaming and laughing at the same time, you didn't knew anything could ever feel this good.

your pussy was extremely wet, mixing with his pre cum, so everything felt even better. thats when you thought if he had a condom on.

"donnie..." you tried to say, but it was impossible. he was also groaning and too fucked out in his own pleasure to answer.

you also thought about his family, what if they were still upstair and heard this?

but if you still had any upcoming thoughts, they easily gone away when donnie hitted a very sensible spot inside you, making you scream in pleasure.

"yeah, right there!"

"fuck baby, your screams are driving me crazy" donnie was now against your back, holding your face to give you a messy kiss. he played with your clit in a fast rhythm, it was all too much. he was trully fucking you dumb.

"tell me your mine, y/n" he whispered in your ear, and you put your hands on his hair.

"i- i'm...yours..." you say, struggling.

"whats it, sweet thing? already cock drunk? got you addicted?" he smirked, not remembering the last time in his life that he felt so happy. "first time being fucked and i already turned you into my little slut."

you camed so hard you thought you would fall down, but he held you strongly. not even a second later, cumming inside you.

"shit..." he groaned. it felt so good to come inside your pussy. he mocked you saying you were already addicted, but in reality he was the one who already could never lever live without that pussy anymore.

you both felt on bed, hugging each other and breathing harshly. he held your head on his chest, caressing your hair. you chuckled, feeling relaxed by your orgasm.

"i still wanna eat your pussy, baby... been fucking starving from how much i wanna taste you"

"don, i'm fucked out."

he laughed at your words. you weren't one to say bad words, ever.

"i'm sure that any bad thought could go away if i gave you enough orgasms to pass out."

[milkywaydrabbles]

12 and 10 fluff with Alucard 🥺 he is feeling insecure about his scars, and about his own being, considering himself to be a monster, and then reader calms him down

A/N: Me pouting the entire time I wrote this bc I love alucard sm and I hate thinking of him sad lmao. I hope this one is okay and that you like it, I'm not sure if it's my best work ): mwuah

"Hold me" "I wish you could see how I see you" x Alucard

Some days are easy. Some days are nice walks in the park, getting free loaves of freshly baked bread because the village people are so grateful for everything he’s done. Some days are sweet, simple, enjoying the day with the love of his life. Other days?

Other days are hard. Terribly so. 

Today was a hard day. A mental rain cloud had been brewing over Alucard for the last few hours, starting when he saw himself fresh out of the bath, scars seared into his skin from what could be one of the most terrible nights of his life. The traumatic events flashed in his mind, rendering him still with fear. Fear that it’d happen again, with you, fear that he’d be useless in the face of danger if someone came for you, fear that he even had the capacity of thinking you capable of such wickedness. His hands trembled, staring at himself in the mirror, a tear escaping from his eye before turning away from the mirror, dressing quickly and getting on with his duties for the day. He didn’t want to think about it anymore.

But the fear had latched onto him, growing and festering into an ugly cycle of feeling self conscious and not good enough, hating the way the scars look, hating the way the scar his father left behind looked. His body marred with imperfect skin, showing the world his weaknesses. The rain cloud had split open and a thunderstorm loomed over him, retiring much earlier from his chores than intended. He threw himself into his studies in hopes that he would forget the sick feeling in his stomach. 

“Adrian, honey?” Your sweet voice called out to him, and it broke him out of his stupor. He forgot about dinner. A dinner that he insisted on helping you with. And he left you there to finish it all by yourself. Alucard felt miserable. He’d been brewing in his own misery; he had been ignoring not only his duties to the village but to you. You must hate him, you must think he’s so selfish, and lazy, and no good, and-- “Ah, there you are!” You smiled, skipping over to him before noticing how rotten he looked. “Adrian? Are you okay?” You worried, bringing a hand up to his forehead. He tried his best to put on a brave face, shaking his head. “I’m fine, love, don’t worry about me. I’m sorry I lost track of him, I left you to prepare dinner alone.” He stood, ready to put on a facade for the rest of the night, lest you think something awful of him. 

But you knew him better than anyone. 

“Dinner can wait, why don’t we just go to the room for a bit?” He wanted more than anything to stay distracted and not think of the burning his skin felt today. But he knew you wouldn’t let him continue to wallow. Alucard sighed, saying nothing and heading into your shared room. You gave him space, sitting across from him. You didn’t ask any specifics, not needing them. All you needed to know is that Alucard wasn’t feeling his best, and that you would do anything for him. “Adrian, sweet boy...what can I do to help?” Your soft voice nearly ruined him, a broken sob escaping without his consent. The palms of his hands pressed into his eyes, hating more than anything in the world this was happening. Now was not the time to look weak. But he needed you, needed to feel grounded. So he broke. “Can you...can you hold me? Please?” He let out a shaky breath, and silently you moved to him, cradling his head in your hands and bringing him closer to your chest, Your legs wrapped around his torso, trying to cover as much of him as possible with yourself, hoping that whatever was tormenting him would slip away with your presence. 

“I’m sorry--I’m sorry love, I fucked up and I missed dinner. I didn’t mean to, I lost track of time and--” You hushed him mid sentence, rocking him gently back and forth in your arms. “Tell me what’s really going on, this isn’t about dinner.” Alucard steadied himself, releasing a breath he hadn’t known he’d been holding. “I can’t stand looking at myself. Not with these disgusting scars.” Your heart shattered hearing how awful he talked about himself. You cursed the world for ever hurting your sweet boy like this. “Adrian, light of my life, fire in my veins, my handsome man--you’re perfect.” You kissed his temple, running a hand over his hair. “The scars are a reminder that you persevered. That you survived.” You gently reminded him, and another kiss. “I wish you could see how I see you. I love every detail about you, I’m so sorry you’ve endured the life you have, but I am so grateful that it has brought you to me.” Slowly, you untangled yourself from him and sat on your knees before him. You took his hands that had loosened from his eyes, kissing each wrist. You pushed the sleeve of his shirt up, kissing the patches of scar tissue that showed through. You moved to his chest, kissing the scarring that showed through the shirt, and mirrored your actions to his other arm. You let go of his arms, wiping away the remaining tears that stained his cheeks and kissed his eyelids, before pressing your forehead to his. 

“You’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever met in my life, inside and out. And that includes the scars. Never doubt yourself, or my love for you. I’ll be here with you, until the ends of the Earth.”

[jasntodds]

Petrichor [12]

Pairing: Jason Todd x Fem!Powered!Reader (little bit of fwb)

Words: 12,719

Chapter Warnings: Swearing, angst, blood, violence, canon violence, manipulation, gunshot wounds, mentions of drug use, drug use, reader is fed the fuck up, description of withdrawal (kind of??)

Summary: ❝Pylades: I’ll take care of you. Orestes: It’s rotten work. Pylades: Not to me. Not if it’s you.❞

Gotham is home, not just for Jason but for you, too. And now that you’re both finally back home, together, you’re ready to see where this next chapter brings the two of you. He’s your best friend and you’re his. And you both might want a little something more with being back home, the place you both feel most comfortable. Surely, nothing could possibly go wrong now.

A/N: I really do just love angst so much lmao You can add yourself to the tag list below, ask me to be tagged, or you can follow my library blog @jasntoddslibrary  and turn on notifications if you prefer that!! I love feedback, I swear it keeps me posting on a weekly basis 😭

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The next day Jason is with Crane. Jason is still reeling from last night. Dick knows pretty much everything now and that wasn’t a part of the plan. Jason thinks it’s only a matter of time before Dick shows back up and destroys the entire thing. It’s only a matter of time before Dick ruins everything all over again. And he thinks about you and how mad and worried you were. It’s all growing a bit too heavy for him, even with the drug. But, he pushes Crane anyway.

The sooner they get this plan in action, the better. The sooner Jason can take care of Dick, the better. But, Crane isn’t having any of it. Crane wants to go through with his plan but he’s also not telling Jason a single thing about it. It’s like Jason is just a piece in his game, a pawn. Doing all of the bidding and only knowing what’s going on when he actually needs to in order to do Crane's bidding. But, Jason shakes that thought off because Crane cares about him. Crane wouldn’t be just using him. Right?

“I met that girl of yours.” Crane states, getting tired of Jason’s pestering about going after Dick.

“I heard.” Jason quips, his voice snippy and harsh.

“She is a handful, isn’t she?”

Jason knows what he’s doing and he won’t. He can be as high as Crane wants him to be but he still has a line. And that line is you. It is always you. Anyone but you.

“I can handle her.” Jason states.

“Can you? You can fight better than her. You've had the training. But, like Dick Grayson, she walked away from last night.” Crane lets out a wistful sigh. “And she threatened to kill me.” Crane looks to be hurt as the words leave his lips. Jason knows better than to think someone threatening Crane's life would hurt his feelings. “Doesn’t it bother you that her and Bruce didn’t kill the Joker for you?” Crane asks and Jason’s eyes land on the floor. “I mean,” Crane lets out another sigh. “That maniac killed you and they couldn’t be bothered to kill him for you. Sam is at least a killer now but not for you. I, though, I brought you back.” Crane gives Jason a sinister smile as he places a hand on his shoulder.

Jason hates it because Crane makes a point. Bruce couldn’t even bend his morals for him. Bruce said he was his son and he took him in, he let him be Robin. Bruce was supposed to protect him and everyone else. But, then he couldn’t even kill the Joker. He’s not asking him to kill Two-face or The Riddler or even Crane, but he should have killed the Joker for him. That’s the part that hurts. And you turn around and starts taking out lowlives but you didn’t even hit the Joker first. Not even for him and you've been wanting his blood on your hands since your mom died. But, somehow, that wasn’t enough for even you. Jason, though, does know someone killed him. And he knows what you said about what him dying did to you. He thinks that person just beat you to it. Bruce though, even Dick. Dick could have killed him, too and he didn’t. No one that claims to care about him at all killed the Joker for him and none of you brought him back. Jonathan Crane brought him back from the dead. Not the people who care bout him.

“This isn’t about her. It’s about Dick.” Jason shakes his head because you're still the line. Despite it all, you're the line he won’t cross.

Jason knows, under the haze of the drug, you would have brought him back from the dead if you knew how. And if it were something you knew he'd want. You would have fought and chewed into fate and the Reaper with nothing but your bare hands just to bring him back. You would have killed the Joker if someone didn't beat you to it. After everything going on, you're still the one person who hasn't given up on him.

You're the line.

“See, that’s your problem. It’s not just about Dick Grayson. It’s about all of Gotham and your girlfriend is a part of that.”

“Okay.” Jason states, unsure where else he could possibly be going with this.

“She’s going to be a problem, just like that older brother of yours.” Crane warns as he turns back around as he walks into the little office building. “She’ll come after me eventually and then I bet she’ll come after you, with Dick Grayson at her side.”

“She’s not a problem.” Jason defends.

You could have killed him last night. If the first knife would have missed, you would have had a second one already in the air on its way to his jugular. If you want someone dead with a knife, you're more than capable but instead, you didn’t. You've had opportunities to kill him and fight him at full force but you don’t. You aren’t the problem, no matter what Crane says.

“Isn’t she? She still wants you to join their side and turn me in, the person who has helped you the most. Haven’t you thought about her using you? Her fear drove her to you and now she’s lost. She doesn’t know who is without you because she got to try to fix you and distract herself from it. You got her to live in that fancy mansion.” Crane says and Jason, right about now, is pretty glad he left out more about you.

Crane pushes sometimes for more information but Jason deflects and pulls information about anyone else he can. Jason won’t let Crane target you. That’s not how this partnership is going to work. It doesn’t matter. Jason Todd doesn’t make very many promises, but he made a promise to you and he’s not breaking it. You don’t break your promises to him.

“She’s not using me. I can get her to join our side.” Jason states, his voice growing more annoyed.

“Then why haven’t you?”

“That wasn’t part of the plan.” Jason lies.

“If I told you to give her the drug and help us, would you?” Crane asks, his brows slightly furrowing with the question because he’s already pretty sure he knows the answer.

Crane doesn’t know you already took the drug. Crane also doesn’t know the real reason Jason burned down his lab. Jason told Crane he was just covering his tracks after Hank. He knew Dick would be digging deeper and he might find it. That isn’t actually a complete lie, that’s probably what would have happened if Dick didn’t already find it. But, the real reason was that he didn’t want you going back and making more of it and taking it. He feels the comedown and sure, while he’s high or when he’s desperate not to feel that way again, it feels worth it. In those moments it always feels worth it but you were always better with dealing with your shit than he was. He doesn’t want you involved with Crane and he doesn’t want you addicted to the drug. You deserve better.

He’d never give you the drug. He’d never ask you to work alongside Crane.

“Yeah, she would do it. She’s just as fucked up as I was.” Jason lies through his teeth, shifting his weight to his right foot.

Crane nods his head but he met you. You're not scared, not in the way Jason was. He can tell you have her own issues but you're not like Jason when Jason showed up at Arkham. “Maybe she’s not who you thought she was.” Crane sighs. “You should really be focused on taking care of her with Dick, if that’s your goal that is.”

“No.” Jason states firmly. “Not happening.” Jason scoffs. “She’s not a fucking problem. She fights with Dick all the damn time and she fought him last night with me. Nothing to worry about.” Jason shakes his head, still a little confused what that was even about.

“Oh, I’m not worried.” Crane states. “You are. If you don’t take care of her, you’ll always be stuck here. You’ll never be able to get to your full potential because you’re too worried about what she’ll do. Maybe what she’ll think of you. Though, I have to say, she is not pleased with you over that Hawk fellow.”

“And she still fought Dick for me.” Jason urges. “Clearly, she doesn’t have that big of a problem with it.”

“I’m just giving you my advice. You want to be fearless but you’re still scared of what she’ll do and what she thinks of you.” Crane tsks.

“I’m not taking care of her. I want to go after Dick. Look, we know the drug works. I’m exhibit one.” Jason states, trying to deflect from you. It can’t be you.

“You’ll see, my boy.” Crane states.

The night before rings through your head like a migraine you can't quit. You and Dick got back pretty later, or rather early in the morning. Dick was instant he could take care of the gunshot wound on his own. He'd done it before, apparently. So, that left you to your room alone and sleeping didn't come too easy.

You could have had both of them but Dick just wouldn't listen and Jason doesn't listen and you're too damn loyal to him. If it were anyone else, you could have thrown a knife to injure them and you would have had him and then could have gotten Crane. But, it's Jason and you don't want to hurt him even if hurting him could bring him back and end up being for his own good. You just won't take the risk. And it sucks. And then you almost got shot because Jason and Dick can't work out their problems like normal people with an actual conversation. You're stuck in the middle of the two of them and you don't even know how the hell that happened.

And then there's the way Jason looked at you when you asked him to come home.

The drug must have been wearing off because he looked scared and for the life of you, you don't know why he would be so scared to come home. Yes, he killed Hank and that's bad but everyone attacked Gar while possessed and moved on from that. Gar killed people when he was being controlled. Jason is killing people while he's manipulated and drugged. None of them have attempted to do anything about any of the people you've killed. Dick just let Bruce walk right out after killing the Joker. Jason shouldn't be scared to come home and you feel horrible he clearly does. Getting him back just got a lot more difficult it seems and you're starting to second guess where you should stand in all of it.

You walk into the Batcave where you find Gar and Kory, looking to be researching something on the Batcomputer. You're best guess is they're trying to track down Jason. That's the only thing anyone is doing these days anyway.

"There you are!" Gar yells with excitement and relief as he rushes to you.

Gar's been worried. You and Dick went off without an explanation and didn't come back last night. Neither of you could even be bothered to answer a phone or keep the phones on for that matter. Kory hadn't heard anything and neither did Connor. He's relieved to see you're okay, even if you're looking a little out of it.

"Oh, yeah, hey." You let out a sigh as Gar brings you in for a hug.

"Where were you last night?" Kory questions. "And where is Dick?"

"And what happened?" Gar asks as he pulls away.

You furrow your brows, looking between them as your heart misses a beat. "W-what do you mean?"

Have they really not seen Dick? You might not have slept long or well but Dick is still, somehow, usually always awake. At least here like maybe the manor is haunting him in its own way. But, Kory and Gar are watching you expectantly and you worry maybe something went wrong with the whole gunshot thing.

"I don't think it's some coincidence you and Dick disappeared yesterday and stopped answering your phones." Kory crosses her arms.

Your jaw opens and closes a few times. "Uh..I mean...yeah..." You offer a yikes expression, squinting your eye slightly.

"Explain, now." Kory states sternly.

"Well, uh, you see...you haven't seen Dick or...heard from him?" You ask slowly.

"No." Kory grows more annoyed by the second.

"Not since he dropped Dawn off." Gar offers, hoping you get to the point soon.

You suck in a breath as you tug your sleeves over your hands. "Uh, yeah...so Dick got, uh shot. But, he was fine."

"So, you just went to bed?!" Gar asks.

"And you didn't think to come get me? Or any of us?" Kory demands.

"He said he had it and he's been shot before. I wasn't gonna argue with him."

"Since when? You argue with him all the time." Gar shakes his head in disbelief. Of all times you aren't going to argue with Dick, it's when he's shot. He could be bleeding out somewhere.

"Yes, I was not in the mood last night." You defend your stance as regret starts to chew at your stomach.

Kory lets out a groan. "And where did you last see him?"

"In the living room? Before I went to bed." You state but before you start giving up more answers, the one and only finally makes his way into the Batcave. "Oh, thank fuck." You let out a breath of relief.

"What happened!?" Kory asks quickly, immediately rushing over to Dick who's a little unsteady on his feet.

You and Gar watch the two of them and you can't help the grin that comes to your lips. Rachel made jokes about the two of them and said she thought it was weird but they'd be cute together. You get it now. Kory ran to him in the same you would have if it were Jason. Dick is clearly the idiot between the two of them.

You eye Gar. "Bet you ten bucks it'll be Kory to close the deal when she gets tired of waiting for him to get his shit together."

"I'm not gonna bet on that." Gar whispers with a soft grimace.

"Because you'll lose?" You raise, offering him a smirk.

"Yes." Gar chuckles. "I don't know if Dick is capable of having that conversation unprovoked."

You nod, rolling your eyes. "Batboys." You let out a sigh. "Okay, I give Kory a month."

"Four, tops." Gar sticks out his hand and you shake it with a soft laugh before you and Gar follow Kory and Dick to the medbay.

Dick takes off his shirt and reveals a gunshot wound on the upper left side of his chest. You furrow your brows. It looks nasty and his entire chest is covered in blood, most of it dry but some of it still looks fresh. Kory shakes her head, grabbing the supplies to stitch up the wound. Gar and you watch for a few minutes, mostly grimacing at the sight of it.

"Dude, that looks horrible." Gar scrunches his nose.

"Five inches over and we'd be burying another body." Kory says as she starts addressing the wound.

"Dude, seriously?" You huff. "You said you'd take care of that." You roll your eyes. You wonder how he could be so dumb. And reckless. It's not like it's a cut or a scrape. It's a literal gunshot wound close to his heart.

Kory stops what she's doing to look at you, Gar nearly snapping his head at you. Dick just glares at you, looking more annoyed than usual.

"What?" You ask, looking between all of them with wide eyes. "What'd I do now?"

"Let him go to bed with a gunshot wound and not tell anyone." Gar mutters under his breath, making you snap your entire attention on him. That's uncharacteristic.

"I'm not gonna force someone to let me help clean up their wounds." You mutter right back, earning a glare of disbelief from Gar. "Okay, unless it's Jaon or you." You snip back. "Sorry." Your eyes widen, looking between the three of them.

Gar keeps his stare on you. You're supposed to be friends and you're not looping him to anything anymore. You and Dick go off to fuck knows where and Dick almost gets killed. They're trying to find Jason since he went dark and you two can't be bothered to work as a team with the team. It's ridiculous. You're supposed to be a family.

"Explain." Kory warms, looking between you and Dick.

"It's nothing." Dick states, watching Kory stitch the wound.

"Nothing?!" Kory yells. "You two went off last night without a word! We deserve an explanation."

Dick pauses and you're not about to be on Kory's bad side. If Dick wants to piss Kory off, that's all on him. You do not want to do that. Kory is usually very nice but you have a feeling being on her bad side could get ugly. Plus, it's Kory.

"Jason's working with Jonathan Crane so we kidnapped him and took him to the cabin to lure Jason there. Then Jason and Dick started fighting and I helped. And then a helicopter came and Dick got shot." You explain simply.

The room falls silent for a few seconds as everyone looks between you and Dick. Kory wants to know why everyone who manages to get involved with Bruce Wayne ends up being some of the most reckless people she's ever encountered. Gar is piecing together everything you've told him and now he's even more frustrated. You and Dick went after Scarecrow and decided you could take him on and Jason on your own without any issues. You both didn't even have a backup plan. And Gar is realizing you not only took Jason's drug, but if it's Scarecrow, it was probably something he designed. You took a drug Scarecrow designed and knew that. Then neglected to tell everyone that piece of information.

You both could have died last night and everyone is supposed to just be normal about that. After everything.

"Wow, thanks." Dick quips.

"I'm not gonna disobey Kory. That's all you." You shake your head as you cross your arms over your chest but you can feel Gar's eyes still boring into you.

"And whose side were you even on last night, by the way?" Dick questions.

"You two morons almost fucking shot me!" You yell. "I was on your side. Hello? Do you not remember that and then you got the first swing on him. I was with you guys until you two almost shot me."

"That was Jason." Dick argues. "He pulled the trigger, not me."

"Because you grabbed his arm! It was aimed at you originally, not me." You let out a scoff.

"Enough." Kory warns, growing tired of the back and forth. The specifics of the fight last night don't matter right now when she's trying to fix a bullet wound that could have been fatal. She is so sick of losing people. "Barbara's responsible for this?" Kory asks.

"One of her snipers is, yeah." Dick answers.

"On her orders, I'm sure." Kory states. "Maybe I should go and have a word with her."

"I think there's been enough bloodshed for today." Gar adds in. "That was way too close, man." Gar's voice is soft but drenched in worry.

"I almost had him." Dick defends.

"No, I had him." You protest. "I had a knife ready to go. He never would have done it. I could have gotten him just fine but then you had to take the damn gun and I almost got shot." You pause for a second and if Dick would have just trusted you, maybe you really could have gotten him back. "We almost had him."

"Neither of you are listening!" Kory yells, looking between the two of you. "You scared us. Going out on your own, getting shot. It's not okay."

"I didn't want to put you guys at risk." Dick says. "She was here when I got the call. She's the only one that ever got through to Jason before. That's the only reason she went." Dick states calmly while Gar looks back at you as if waiting for you to explain why you didn't at least tell him.

"I'm not dragging you into it." You look to Gar as you shrug your shoulders.

"Oh, bullshit, guys." Gar spits and he's sick of this.

"Excuse me?" Dick questions.

"Dude, Hank blew up!" Gar yells. "Dawn left us forever, and Jason went dark. You're killing people!" Gar looks at you. "This family is dying and you two go out alone and Dick gets shot?" Gar yells before he starts growling lowly, his entire face turning green while his teeth turn into fangs. "Do you even hear the words coming out of your mouths!?"

"Gar?" You question slowly as your eyes grow wide. You've never seen him this upset before.

"Gar!" Kory yells, trying to snap him out of it.

"Hey." You stand in front of him, putting your hands on his cheeks. "Hello?"

His eyes land on yours, refocusing his attention and the fire in his bones starts to calm. The green fades from his face as his fangs start to retract. He's so upset and hurt and terrified for the lives of the people he cares about most, he didn't even realize he was starting to transform and Gar doesn't lose control.

"What?" Gar asks, his eyes scanning your face.

"Take ten." Kory states and she also feels like they're starting to lose everyone.

"Come on." You offer your hand to him as you turn around to walk away. Gar joins his hand with yours. "Don't do anything fucking insane without looping me in." You look over your shoulder at Dick, sending him a glare before you turn back around. "You were turning green." You whisper to Gar as you walk hand-in-hand across the Batcave.

"Because you guys could have died last night! I'm sick of losing this family!" His voice is panicked this time.

Gar might wear his emotions on his sleeve, but he is also very good at controlling his emotions. He never just loses control but he is today and it has you feeling even more guilty than you already were. Dick has Kory and Babs. You have Gar and Molly. Conner didn't really know Hank and he doesn't really know Jason. Gar, though, he knew Hank and was friends with Hank. Jason is his best friend and yet everyone has someone besides him. Everything has been a mess and Gar is the one left trying to fix everyone and help everyone but who helps him?

"Come on." You tug him along with you until you reach the living room. You let go of his hand and take a seat on the couch. "Yell at me for it. Go for it. You're scared and mad at us, fine. I get it. So, yell about it. I'm not gonna tell you to take ten. Turn green, turn into a tiger, go for it." You say with ease while Gar just stands in front of you, growing confused.

"What...? But I...I don't know..."

"Look, if you need to yell, do it. I deserve it and Dick does, too. You let me bitch to you for months. So, yell about how you're scared. I'm not gonna be hurt or mad. If it'll make you feel even a little bit better, do it. You take care of all of us, all the time. Take care of you." You offer and it's true. If he needs to yell about it, he should. You're not worried about him turning into a tiger. Gar deserves to let everything off of his chest. He always lets everyone else vent to him.

Gar's eyes narrow slightly. "This feels like a trick."

"It's not. I'd yell at Jason sometimes. He just kind of let me and then he'd yell at me. It was never that we were really yelling at each other, but just yelling. Because we were scared or mad. It usually helped. So, go for it." You shrug softly. "I do deserve it though so ya know."

Gar lets out a breath and decides he'll take the opportunity. He is just scared for all of you. Losing Donna was really hard. And losing Jason was worse. He was close with Json and that sucks. And now he's back and he's dark, working with a maniac. Hank is gone, there's no getting him back. Gar just can't lose more people and he's pissed that you and Dick don't seem to care how any of them feel about it. You're supposed to look out for each other to make sure you don't get blown up or beaten to death but Dick and you just go off on your own without a word.

"I'm just mad at you guys and I'm scared you're gonna go out there and get yourselves killed." Gar groans. "We had no idea where you guys went. You guys left and didn't loop us in. We're supposed to be a team and I know you're between teams but we're at least supposed to be friends! Jason is my friend, too! I want to be on his side. But you guys aren't telling us anything! I don't want to lose any more people."

You're tired of everything and you're tired of keeping secrets especially when Gar is looking at you desperate for answers. He says you're between teams right now but what if you don't want to be anymore? Jason is going to do whatever Crane is putting him up to and Dick is going to off and do his own thing anyway. Nothing you're doing has been working anyway. Maybe you're tired of being the one in the middle.

"The call about Crane came in and we left. I was with Dick and I don't think he would have looped me in if I wasn't already there. You're my friend. You're right. And that's why I didn't tell you." You state. "It's just...I wanted to protect you, I guess. I, uh, I've been dodging Molly's calls and texts, too because of it. I'm with you, I'm sick of losing people. So, I didn't tell you."

"Okay and I get that but this is what we do." Gar urges. "We help each other and we help other people even when it's dangerous. It's dangerous but you and Dick still go out there alone. At least if we're all working as a team, we have a better shot of making it home."

You chew the inside of your cheek and you think your heart might stop beating soon. "I fought him, ya know? And I know what that was like because even though I was high, I'm sober now and I remember every detail. And it fucking sucks that happened. I didn't want that to happen to you. I don't want him to have a bigger reason to target you." You shake your head and you shrug slowly and weakly. "He's not your fight, Gar."

"Yeah, he is." Gar urges. "Why wouldn't he be? He's my best friend."

"Because I owe it to him." You nearly yell. "I owe it to him to fucking save him because he saved me more than once and I never fucking told him. I missed it. I will never forgive myself for it. I have to save him this time."

"You don't have to do it alone." Gar's voice nearly breaks and he desperately wishes that's something you would understand. You never have to do this stuff alone. That's part of being a team and a family. "He's our friend. He's our family. We weren't here and that sucks! But he's not just yours to save. What if you can't do it alone?" Gar asks. "You're up against a freaky drug, Jason who I don't think you could really fight if you had to, and Scarecrow!"

"I know." You nod your head. "I don't know, okay? I know I can't do it alone. I'm sorry. I really am." You suck in a breath. And you're realizing you do a lot of things alone. It's as if it's easier to do them alone and only disappoint yourself, risk your own life than drag other people in the middle of it. "Really, I'm sorry. I was...scared if I tell you then you have to tell Dick and what if that got Jason killed, ya know? I don't know. I'm sorry though."

"You can tell me." Gar says. "I know you're worried about him but you can tell me and I won't tell Dick." Gar stresses. "Not if there's a risk it'll get Jason killed again."

"I know." You nod. "I'll try harder. I'm really sorry, Gar." You let out a breath. "I'm, uh, I'm gonna stay out of it today and take a breather. Might head to Excellent Gotham later, just so you know." You offer a soft smile.

"It's okay." Gar nods his head and offers a soft smile back. "You're going to be able to do that?"

"Yeah, I think better when I take a step back and I need to find a way to not be in the middle." You let out a soft chuckle. "While not doing it alone. But, if something happens..."

"I'll let you know." Gar's eyes widen. "Thank you." Gar clears his throat, rubbing the back of his neck. "That did help a little actually."

"Told you." You laugh softly as you get to your feet. "Want some food now? Yelling really works up an appetite."

"Yeah okay." Gar chuckles as you get up. "Oh! I can tell you about Blackfire."

"Blackfire?" You quirk a brow.

"Kory's sister. She was kind of tapping into Kory's head and she attacked me yesterday so we went to find Blackfire. Some scientist was holding her captive." Gar states excitedly.

"Um..." You stutter. "Well, we already have so much in common." You laugh softly. "But yeah, no, please explain literally all of that." You say eagerly as the two of you make your way to the kitchen.

Jason and Crane are standing in the washing area of an operating room, watching as the surgeon and the nurses prep a kid for something. Jason isn't sure why Crane made him come here. He said he wanted to show Jason something. It's important he understands what's going on and Jason's part in all of this. If Jason were being honest, he thinks Crane is full of shit this time and he just wants to get out of here. This feels wrong.

Then it gets worse.

A woman comes in holding a sword and starts slicing up the surgeon and nurses. Jason's eyes grow wide as his breathing stops. Blood sprays over the walls and window right in front of Jason. A nurse backs against the window with her hands up and begs for her life only for the woman to slice her, too. This isn't right. Why would Crane do this? They're doctors. They're helping some kid live and Crane has this woman come in....and kill them. She takes something with her before looking at the window and offering Crane a nod. Jason questions if all of that bloodshed was for that one thing. She didn't have to kill them. But, she did.

"You are expendable. If you're not happy here, you are replaceable. Remember what I said." Crane says as he faces Jason and that's when Jason realizes this whole thing might be to help Crane, but the show was a threat.

Crane is withholding the drug from him today. Jason finished the inhaler and then Crane refused to give him more until they came here. He's withholding it on purpose, let Jason's fear kick in just enough to keep him in line and make him desperate. And it's working.

He's scared again.

He's scared he'll end up like the surgeons and nurses. He's scared Crane is the one who's going to turn on him. Red Hood is supposed to be the face of the whole plan. That was the point of creating that alter ego. Crane wants Jason to get rid of you and just do whatever he says, when he says it. He wants him to divert from the original plan while telling him nothing about what's actually going on. He can't do that. That is his line.

Crane can try all he wants but no amount of drugs or manipulation will get him to cross that line. He might believe Crane sometimes about you, maybe he has a point sometimes. But, he won't kill you. You could have killed him at any point but you don't. You could have pushed him off a roof but you didn't. When Jason gets desperate he thinks of that because you're the one that stood on that ledge with him despite your fear of heights. You're the one that talked him down that day no one else and he owes you something for that alone. He won't go after you. He doesn't fucking care what Crane has to say about it, he won't do it.

The more he thinks about it, the more mad he gets. Crane thinks he's expendable, just like Bruce. But he's not. Why does everyone think he's so fucking expendable and replaceable? Why is nothing he does enough? He turned on all of his friends for Crane. He killed Hank for Crane. That's not enough to prove he's not replaceable and expensable? It's infuriating. He'll prove Crane wrong. If Crane wants to get to you, he'll have to go through him first. If Crane wants to wait to distribute the drug, that's a Crane problem, not a Jsaon problem. And he knows exactly what he can do to prove Crane he's not expendable and he can be trusted.

Later that night, you find your way to Excellent Gotham. The other Titans have been busy trying to locate Crane and Jason. You kept yourself busy with a scrapbook page while they did their own thing. It's not really all that nice distancing yourself alone. You figure Excellent Gotham at least provides dinner and you can talk to Tim, someone who doesn't know everything that's going on and doesn't come with the feeling of guilt. If Tim wants to talk about who the Titans are and Batman and Robin, that's fine, too because it's what you always did. Before everything. It'll feel normal anyway. At least Excellent Gotham is a good distraction and lets you take the breather you need. If you're going to be any help, you need the step back. You're too close to it all.

So, you stand at the counter with Tim on the other side as a large smile consumes your face, a take-out counter resting open in front of you.

"Okay, okay, why Bruce Wayne? Like, okay if Dick were Robin, how does that make Bruce Batman?" You question as Tim leans against the counter.

There's a genuine smile splitting your face as you point at him with your fork before going in for another bite. You've been here a few hours, checking in with Gar every so often, a way to try and keep your word to him. And this is helping. You might be in a heated discussion about who everyone is but it feels normal. It doesn't feel heavy anymore. It's just a normal conversation with a friend and it doesn't feel fucking sad. It just feels warm.

You don't remember the last time you felt warm.

"He's rich." Tim scoffs, a grin plastered across his face. "And why else would he let Dick go out there?"

"Unless he doesn't know. Bruce is a busy man. Dick being Robin doesn't mean Bruce is Batman and that's if Dick is Robin." You argue with a laugh. "And that means you'd also be wrong about Jason."

"No, no, I know I'm right about Dick and Jason." Tim pauses, the smiling falling. "Is...is that okay to talk about? Jason?"

"Yeah." You nod with a soft smile. "I, uh, I like talking about him."

"Okay well," Tim picks right back with enthusiasm. You find it amusing how into this he is. Especially since he's right. "He has to be Robin. He has the same fighting style. He walks the same way, how do you explain that?" Tim raises. "And Robin 1.0 and Robin 2.0 share the same height difference as Jason and Dick." Tim states. "If they're the Robins, Bruce has to be Batman."

"Unless!" You yell with a laugh, flinging your fork around. "Dick recruited Jason because they're brothers! Like I said, Bruce is busy. What if Batman is just some guy? Like Kick-Ass. Doesn't have to be some rich guy and maybe he's recruiting kids." You argue and truly, you're only defending Bruce because you think it's funny. And Dick would kill you if you outed fucking Batman.

"Batman can be Batman because he's rich." Tim laughs. "Uh, where has Bruce Wayne been? Where has Batman been? They disappeared the same time!" Tim laughs.

"Bruce is on business! Maybe there's a Justice League thing!" Your laugh reverberates through the restaurant. This feels like home. "How the fuck would I know where Batman is?" You put your fork back in your food. "And that's still assuming Dick is Robin! He's not. Explain Dick having a stick up his ass. Robin is more free-spirited!"

"Sorry to interrupt this very important conversation." Mr. Drake states, walking back to the counter. "But Tim, where is Stephen? Get him on the damn phone and find out where he is. Or you're stuck here all night."

"Shit." Tim mutters, checking his phone to see Stephen's shift started an hour ago. "Okay, hold on." Tim says. "And we'll continue this." Tim laughs as he calls Stephen on FaceTime. "Where are you, man? Your shift started over an hour ago."

"Priorities. My girl's parents are out of town. I'll be there in a second." Stephen says through a grin.

"Seriously? I could have plans." Tim protests.

"What plans?" You snort. "You're here with me arguing about Batman."

"Whatever. Just hurry up." Tim says as he hangs up and three men walk into the restaurant.

Tim is about to start talking all over again with even more enthusiasm and proof but he gets a look at your face, eying the men as they walk further into the restaurant. Maybe you’re just paranoid but they look like they’re up to something. It’s that their walk is steady, determined, but careless. Their eyes don’t land on the menu or Tim or Mr. Drake. They’re pointed at the register. And that’s when you see the reflection of metal sticking out of the last guy’s waistband. He looks to you and then it starts.

The throbbing kicks in like a freight train. It’s an armed robbery and they plan to go out swinging. You’re quick, rushing to Tim as they pull out their guns. Gunfire surrounds and encompasses the restaurant as you tackle Tim to the floor behind one of the counters.

Tim leans against the counter, ducking his head with every echo of a gunshot. His eyes are on you as you take a breath, as if to be debating what you’re going to do. And Tim knows you knew this would happen. You were running to him before they had their guns pulled. And his thoughts are confirmed when you look back to him with fury in your eyes.

It’s been less than five seconds but it gives you enough time to gather yourself. It’s all you need. These people are not going to walk in here and murder the people you care about. They picked the wrong restaurant on the wrong night during one of the worst months of your life.

You lift your hoodie, pulling a knife from the belt around your waist before you pop up from behind the counter.

“Ya fucking missed, assholes!” You yell over at them as the knife leaves your fingers, connecting with one of the guys’ eyes, embedding itself deep into his skull as he drops to the ground.

The throbbing starts again from the side and you duck down just before a shot comes your way. You take another deep breath before grabbing another two knives and throwing one, hitting one of their jugulars. The last one still standing locks eyes with you, his gun pointed right at you. He has this…grin, one you almost swear you’ve seen before but you’ve never seen him before this. His breathing is steady and he actually looks relaxed while you have your arm ready and aimed with a knife, right at him.

His pupils are blown.

And then your heart sinks because Crane is free on the streets and these guys came in here completely fearless. This one finds the whole damn thing amusing. Maybe he’s just high on something else, or maybe you’re right and Jason and Crane have moved to disruption. Excellent Gotham wouldn’t just be a coincidence.

“Give me the money and it’ll be over.” He says so easily you nearly roll your eyes.

“Kiss my ass.” You throw the knife, hitting this one in the arm with the gun.

Then you throw another one, hitting him just below the eye. He drops to the ground in a hard thump, leaving the restaurant a glass and gun-shelled mess. The smell of gun metal seeps into the air while an eery and dense silence consumes the place.

Tim calls your name not ten seconds after the last man drops. There’s panic in his voice, a sense of dread. You rush right over to him where he’s against the food counter now, his dad leaning against the side of it. Blood seeps through Tim’s hands are he tries to hold pressure on the wound. You kneel down, seeing Mr. Drake breathing heavily. Your eyes scan over him, quickly running over the crash course Jason gave you in gunshot wounds once.

“He’s been shot!” Tim yells, desperation in his eyes as he looks to you, silently pleading for help. He knows you're Bluejay. He can only assume you've had some sort of training in this. More than he's had.

You can feel the lump in your throat grow and the spinning of your head. Blood never really bothered you and it didn't with Dick. But, it was mostly dry with him earlier and this, right now, is fresh and active. Your bones feel like they're going to vibrate through your skin and your teeth grind together, trying to push every thought out of your mind that isn't first aid. 

You have to help.

“Okay, move.” You urge as Tim pulls his hands away. Your hands are shakey as you lift Mr. Drake’s shirt, seeing the wound oozing and you think you might prefer knife wounds instead of gaping holes. “It’s gonna take the ambulance ten to fifteen to get here,” You rush out. “So, we–”

“Is that…?” Tim asks, cutting you off as his eyes are on the window. He only even looked up to see if he saw someone for help or Stephen but instead of help, he just saw one person.

Jason Todd.

You look up just in time to catch a glimpse of him before he turns around. This cannot really be happening right now. Jason Todd is supposed to be dead. It was all over Gotham City News. Bruce's newest adoptive son was killed in a freak accident. This is going to be a lot harder to explain to Tim and you want to explode. If he's here, you're right.

Why the fuck would he be here and why the fuck would he target the place you frequent?

“Okay, keep pressure.” You look to the door, seeing Stephen rush in. “Stephen, call an ambulance and grab some towels!” You yell as you get to your feet. “Stay here, hold pressure with the towels. I’ll be right back.” Your words nearly slur together as they come out as fast as your mouth will let them.

You rush outside where you see Jason, his back facing the open windows of the restaurant. You can’t believe this. Of all the things he could do, of all the damn people in Gotham he could target, he really came for you. For your friend and his family. You can’t fucking do it anymore. This is insane. If he wants to go after Dick, fine. Sibling rivalry bullshit taken to an extreme. But this? This is targeting innocent fucking people.

“Jason!” You seethe as you approach him. “What. The. Fuck!?” You scream, nearly vibrating from the anger coursing through your veins.

But then Jason faces you.

The anger washes away as your mouth opens, looking for words. There are dark circles under his eyes, a hollowed expression of the charism that used to radiate off of him. Maybe it’s the dark lighting but you swear the green in his eyes is pale, his skin is pale. He looks like a shell of who he used to be. He’s been acting like it but now…he really looks the part and you’re getting the idea that something really bad is happening.

Jason’s eyes are wide, tired, and exhausted but wide as he sees you come to a dead stop a few feet away from him. Why are you here? You’re not supposed to be here. You should be with Dick and the other Titans. He didn’t see you inside of the restaurant. Not before the gunfire or after. How did he miss you? It can’t be you. He just wanted to show Crane he was right. He wanted to prove he could do this. He chose Excellent Gotham on purpose, a way to show Crane it’s a threat at you without being a real threat. He knows you went to Tim for help. You weren’t supposed to be here.

Jason questions your name, closing the rest of the distance between the two of you.

His hands immediately come to your face for just a second and they send a chill down your spine. His fingers are like icicles and they're clammy, completely different than how they usually are and it breaks your heart. He keeps his right hand on your cheek, while the other hand goes to your waist. His eyes scan you over quickly, desperate to make sure you weren’t hurt in the gunfire. He didn’t take the drug again yet, he was saving it for after. He’s scared. Panicked. Desperate and guilty. You have blood on your hands and on your clothes. Can’t be yours. Not you. 

Please not you.

“Are you hurt?” Jason rushes but his voice is weak and fragile, echoed in pain.

You eye him and you’re stuck between wanting to punch him and wanting to kiss him in hopes to make it all better again. He’s slipping so far away from you and you’re scared how far he’s willing to fall. Crane is doing something to him. He has to because he didn’t look like this last night. He didn’t even seem like he cared this much last night. Right at this exact moment, he feels like the old Jason. And you nearly get sucked right back into his gravitational pull.

“What…” The venom is gone from your voice. “What is he doing to you?” You ask, your hand comes to to his face. Not him. Not again.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” Jason’s voice breaks.

“You know I’m always here. I was hanging out with Tim. Jason…what the hell is he giving you?” You look him over and you notice him favoring his leg. You haven’t seen him much since he’s been back from the dead but this is the first time since that first day you’re noticing it. You always notice it.

“Are you hurt?” Jason asks again and he can feel his heartbeat in his throat. He wants to spit his own heart right onto the ground in hopes it’ll stop the pain in his chest.

“No. I’m fine. It’s not mine.” You urge, catching him glancing at your free hand. “Jason, what is Crane giving you?”

Jason shakes his head, dropping his other hand to your waist. He misses you. He’s been so damn high all the time, he’s been able to ignore the longing in his chest. The one who always swore was his heart searching for yours. He could ignore it with ease but Crane has been keeping the drug close to his chest and this batch isn’t very good. He can feel it more tonight. It’s wearing off quicker. He can feel the worry for you and the care and the fact he fucking misses you. And the guilt for everything that’s led you both here.

“Same shit.” Jason grits his teeth. “You took it, you know.” He hates the words leaving his lips because they sound bitter and angry but it’s not at you. He just wants you to be okay and he wants to get the fuck out of here.

“No.” You shake your head, your voice soft. “Are you sure it’s the same drug? Jason, you look…is he withholding it from you?” His skin is cold and clammy under your fingers and his hair is flatter than usual.

You’ve seen it, what withdrawal looks like. You saw it on the streets and that’s what Jason looks like. Why would Crane do that? He’s insane and he doesn’t actually give a shit about Jason but Jason has been doing all of his bidding. You figure Jason is here with the drug. That’s why he just stood here while Excellent Gotham was attacked, he probably gave it to them. Surely, that has to be part of the plan. But, if that’s the case, then why does Jason look like he’s been thrown headfirst into withdrawal? And why would Crane be doing this?

“Stay the fuck out of it. I have it. It’s the same shit. It’s fine.” Jason grits his teeth. He wants to break. He wants to lose it for the first time since that first day on the roof with you. It feels like it’s been months since and it’s only been a week. And you look at him with worry and fear and you have always had a way with getting Jason to breathe. But, he can’t afford that right now. Not you. “Please.”

"It's fine?" You spit. "You look terrible, Jason. It's not fucking fine."

"Yeah, it is." Jason removes his hand from your waist and digs in his coat pocket, pulling out a full inhaler. "Fine." He wiggles the inhaler for you to see, the liquid sloshing around in the clear canister.

After all of that, he's going to wave the drug around as if it's fucking easy. He's going to stand here and pretend like it's all fine and well when he almost got you and Tim shot? He's actually lost his damn mind now. If he's going to stick with Crane despite everything, fine. You've stuck by his side since day one all those months ago. Fine. If it's going to be like that, fine because you can't take it anymore. You love him more than anything on this planet but this is not fucking fine. He's not fine and he has got to realize that. 

"Fine!?" You shake your head, eyes bugging out of your head in disbelief. "Get off me." You shove his hand off of you as you take a step back. It's not fine. None of this is fucking fine. He's not fine. That drug isn't fine. Working with Crane isn't fine. Doing what he just did isn't fucking fine. It doesn't matter what his reason is. "You...you just got Tim's dad shot. Do you know that? What have the Drakes ever done to you?" You look at him with disgust. "You could have gotten Tim shot, my friend. You could have gotten me shot!" Your voice cracks as you yell at him, your arm flying out to the side. You might be worried about him but you're not going to let him almost kill your friends because you're worried about him.

"That wasn't the plan!" Jason screams in desperation, his words clawing at the hope for you to believe him. "You went to Tim, didn't you!? I know you suck at figuring out codes! Tim is a genius. I just wanted to scare him!" Jason defends his stance, leaving out Crane wanting Jason to target you. If you knew this was a fake threat, maybe that'd be worse.

"Bullshit! Bull-fucking-shit! You gave them the drug! That's why you're here! You did this! You knew what would happen and you did it anyway!" You bark back. "You just wanted to scare him!? Then do it your damn fucking self, Jason! You just didn't want the blood on your damn hands so I couldn't blame you! But you did this!" You point a finger at him and Jason isn't sure he's seen you so mad and...disappointed.

"You weren't supposed to be here! I didn't think they'd shoot anyone!"

That's not a lie. He didn't think. He just did it. He knew they'd go in there and rob them. Maybe they'd have to close down for a little bit. For safety. He didn't think about anything else. Thanks to the drug Jason claims is helping him and curing him.

You don't fucking get it. It doesn't matter that you weren't supposed to be here. That's a load of shit anyway. You're always here. Tim and his family are innocent, regardless on if Tim helped you or not. He doesn't know anything, not for sure. Jason's reasoning is flawed and it's cruel. It fucking hurts.

"Tim is my fucking friend! I don't care I wasn't supposed to be here! You....fuck." You let out a desperate groan, tilting your head back. At some point, enough is enough and he isn't even taking responsibility for this. You just can't do this anymore. You look back to him, eyes turning glassy. "I was fucking fine with you being a crime lord or whatever, taking out those fucks hurting people. But this?" You point at the restaurant. "These are innocent people! Hank was innocent! Dick is innocent! I can't fucking stand here and watch you kill innocent fucking people! And innocent fucking people that I care about and that care about me!" You say it all so quickly, you barely register what it would mean.

No no no no no. He fucked it all up. Like he always does. He just ruined it all. Everything is gone. Everything is going to shit. It's all messed up. He did all of this. How did he even get here? You can't walk away from him. You always swore you wouldn't. Please, not you, too.

You're all he has left.

"What's that supposed to mean, huh?" Jason asks, jerking his up quickly as he tries to give the question some bite.

You let out a heartbroken laugh that's mixed with a cry as you look to the sky and hope a blackhole will open up just to swallow you whole. You have no choice.

You have thrown him life preserver after life preserver, and all he ever had to do was hold on and you'd reel him back to safety. But, all Jason has done is chew right through them and wonder why he's still drowning. You can't keep trying to save someone who doesn't want to be saved. He was always your lifeline but you were clearly, never his.

"You win, Jason." Your voice is defeated as Jason's brows furrow. The lump in your throat grows so large you can barely get the words out. "You win. I can't do it anymore. I'm done. I can't." You shake your head as a tear falls down your cheek. The words taste like blood-covered glass, killing you with every cut and slice.

If you're always on his side, then what he's doing can't be that bad. If you're always on his side, defending him, why would he ever stop? You've tried everything else to get him home and none of it is enough. And it is killing you, knowing this is it. There is one last option because something's gotta give. Maybe if he hits rock bottom, having no one, maybe it'll turn him around. It's the only thing left to do because begging him doesn't work, loving him doesn't work, fighting him doesn't work, arguing doesn't work. Nothing else works and you hate it because you don't mean it, not even a little bit but you have no other options and you're devasted by what he is right now.

So, you say the one thing you can't take back.

A last-ditch effort, knowing he may never forgive you.

"I'm giving up on you. You get what you always wanted. I can't do it. I have tried and tried, but I can't do it anymore." You give him a tired shrug as you dodge his eyes.

If you see the heartbreak in his eyes, you'll take it back and you can't do that. If Jason always has you on his side, why would he turn things around when he hasn't yet? You could have died two nights in a row. He is actively targeting the Titans. You can't meet his eyes because he is targeting innocent people. It might be under Crane's control but, until he gets clear of him and gets clean, this has to be on Jason. Jason has to be the one to deal with the consequences and you will never forgive yourself for it.

Jason's world stops. Not you. Not another person. Why does he always do this? How did he even get here? You were never supposed to be involved. He should have included you from the start. He almost rips the inhaler from his pocket and hits it, right in front of you, anything to get rid of this pain in his chest. It's as if his heart just exploded through his cage, shattering every bone on its way out. How are you doing this?

You're all he has left.

Jason shakes his head, fighting back tears of agony and anger. "You're just like everyone else." Jason's voice cracks.

You knew it was coming but something about it makes you want to burst into tears.

"No." You shrug because he should know how badly this hurts you, too. This is the last thing you want to say to him, ever. "I'm not. I am not like everyone else. Don't ever say that shit again. You have done this. You came after my friend. My innocent friend, Jay." Your voice cracks as you try desperately to hold back your sobs. "All you have done since coming back from the dead, is hurt me." You pause, taking a ragged breath and Jason's face falls. Is that true? "And I have done everything to protect you. To be by your side. And you have done nothing but hurt me. So, no. I am not like everyone else. You just gave me no choice, Jay." You're quick to wipe a few tears away as your voice is weak and soft, lacking all fire and bite it had just seconds earlier.

He can't do it. He could try to make up for this. He could try to explain. He could just quit. That would do the job just fine. But, he doesn't. The heartbreak kicks in with anger and he just wants to be spiteful just like he always is as if fighting the person is going to change their mind. He knows it won't change yours but he does it anyway because he's hurt and the hurt has nowhere to go besides the open and cold air of this soulless city.

"You swore you never would but look at you now!" A lump grows in Jason's throat. "You said you don't break promises. Crane was right about you." Jason sneers as he closes the distance between you, looking down at you but he's not threatening or intimidating. You see the heartbreak in his eyes. You will feel guilty about this in every life you live.

Jason Todd has always deserved better.

"Okay." You shake your head slowly. "Sure, Crane doesn't know me. But you do. You know me. And you know I'd never be giving up if you left me another option. But, sure, believe Crane. Fuck it, right?" You scoff and all you want to do is cry. Or break every bone in your body because maybe that would be less painful. "I'm sick of losing my family." Your voice is quiet, barely a whisper. "All I ever wanted was you. And you died." You shrug your shoulders, keeping your eyes on him. "And all I wanted was you." You say quietly and Jason wants to shatter, his breath catching in his throat as his vision starts to go blurry. "And still, all I want is you but...I don't know what else to do."

You can see your breaths mixing together in the winter air between you. Everything led you both here and all you both want to do is take it back. The winter air chisels at your face and hands, hacking away at every hope you could have had. Jason's eyes are locked on yours, dissolving into heartbreak and you think this is what hypothermia must feel like.

But, Jason is too scared of what will happen if he does take it all back. He's still under Crane's manipulation. He's too stubborn. And you're terrified what will happen if you back down. If you back out of it, who will he target next?

"So, that's just it? I didn't mean to hurt anyone in there. It's not my fault." Jason huffs and the anger starts to evaporate as the heartbreak comes in the form of agony and devastation.

"Sure." You nod and you don't want him to feel like he's trapped with Crane. You have to give up because that's your option. But, you can offer him someone else and maybe that'll be enough. This all boils to Dick anyway. "The same way your drug isn't Crane's fault. Look, I'm done. I can't do it. Dick though, he believes in you still. So, if you want to come home, call him. Don't contact me. If you get clean, then you can. Until then, don't call me. Don't text me. Nothing. And stay the fuck away from the Drakes, Molly, and Gar." You try to hide the quiver in your voice but Jason catches it.

"Please, don't walk away." Jason says softly and you nearly collapse into the ground. His words are like knives aiming right for your heart. How does he do that?

You rest a hand on his cheek. "I can't leave it like that so, I'll always love you, Jay but...I want the old you back." You nod as your hand falls from his cheek. You turn around, going to leave him but you hear Jason take a few slow steps after you before they stop.

Jason's voice cracks as he says your name, his version becoming so blurry he can't see. "I...I'm sorry." Jason says quietly, looking to the ground as a tear falls from his eyes. "Don't...please," He looks back up to you. "Don't give up on me. I have a plan and it's all gonna work out. This was just an accident."

You swear he's never going to forgive you for this. This is the hardest thing you've ever done. Even if he understands one day, he'll never forgive you and it's the hardest pill to swallow.

"Yeah, I'm sure it was." You nod softly. "I can't save you. You don't want to be saved, not yet. You have to save yourself, now, Jay. And for what it's worth, I..." You pause watching tears come to Jason's eyes. "I love you, Jay." You nod your head as you sniffle. "And I am so fucking sorry I couldn't save you. From Deathstroke, from the Titans, from the Joker...from Bruce. And from Crane. I'm sorry I was another person that let you down and I'm really fucking sorry I'm walking away." You shake your head as you lick your lips. "But I don't think you'll get it through your head if I'm in your corner. I've tried everything to stay." You suck in a breath as a few tears fall from your eyes. "I tried to stay for once because being with you was worth it to me. But I don't think it's helping you so...get clean and we can talk. The second you get clean, I'll be here." You nod once as the ambulance finally starts to arrive. "Those are for us. You should leave." You turn back around and head back inside of the building, leaving Jason in the cold.

How could he fuck up this bad? He just wanted to show Crane he was right. He just wanted to prove himself and instead, he's the one standing out here all alone. Guilt and shame gnawing at the last good parts of him. And he just can't do it anymore. The pain and the fear and guilt and everything about it. It's too much and too heavy and maybe he's a little spiteful. So, he puts the inhaler to his lips and takes a hit.

They said it was a skinny batch but he didn't realize it would feel like this. It's numbing a lot of everything but not enough and it all still feels too heavy. When things get heavy, he always went to you but he just fucked that up. It's his fault it's heavy. This is all his fault and you're supposed to be on his side but you're not. He's all alone again and all he has is Crane. It's not supposed to be like this. How the fuck did he even get here?

All he wanted was to be somebody to someone. To be enough.

Back in the restaurant, the paramedics are getting Mr. Drake into the ambulance, rushing him off to Gotham General. Tim watches with sad and hollowed eyes, his hands are covered in blood and his shirt is soaked. You squeeze your eyes shut, looking away before you shake it off. You can't lose it over Tim's dad. That's not fair.

"Do...do you need a ride?" You clear your throat as the ambulance drives away. "I have my bike. I can take you." You offer with a steady and firm nod.

"Uh...yeah," Tim looks at his hands, something lost in his voice. "That...that would be great. Thanks."

"Of course." You nod, reaching down for this hand. Your hands have been covered in blood enough times to almost seem normal. "Come on."

The two of you head outside to your bike and you wonder how you're supposed to explain this. Dick talked to you months ago, when you first came to the tower. It was all about vigilante life and what it entailed. It would be making hard decisions but knowing those hard decisions would be for the greater good. It's not killing people because enough people hurt and kill innocent people enough. Vigilantes, heroes, don't do that. It was about keeping the identities of everyone a secret to protect yourself and them. You've never had much of an issue keeping secrets.

You hold your own close to your chest, lock them away where even you forget they exist sometimes. But, those secrets aren't these. Those secrets only ever hurt you, only ever made you feel alone. These secrets that you're forced to keep hurt everyone you care about. They hurt Molly because you couldn't tell her about Bluejay or Robin or Jason or Red Hood. You and Jason would bail on her and you'd both would show up riddled with bruises and aches and pains. It hurt her because it worried her. It hurt her because Jason died and she never got to know him as Robin, the part of him that meant the world to him. She only got to know a portion of him.

But telling Molly meant telling her about Dick and Bruce and the other Titans. It wasn't your secret to tell because it would out all of them. And she still doesn't know he's alive because telling her means leaking something Jason wanted to keep a secret and that's going to hurt her even more.

This hurts Tim because his dad was just shot and he just saw Jason Todd who's supposed to be dead. Now, he's going to think his friend is lying to him about your boyfriend being dead. Lying about an alter ego is one thing, lying about someone dying is cruel. Even if you weren't close.

And it hurts Gar because Gar ends up in the crossfire of everything. He's the one up worrying when you and Dick don't come home. He's the one scared for what Jason is going to do because you couldn't tell him about the drug in order to protect Jason and keep his secrets for him. And then there's Jason.

You can't tell Jason what's going on with the Titans because of Crane. You can't tell him everything you want to desperately scream from the rooftops. That you're sorry and you don't mean it and it hurts you, too. You can't tell him you're scared Crane is going to snap and kill him. It'll drive the wedge further between you. All of these secrets are piling on top of each other, slowly building to the tallest building in Gotham and it's only a matter of time before the whole thing collapses. All it does is hurt everyone you care about. That doesn't seem very heroic.

"Here, take my helmet." You offer the helmet to him once you reach your bike.

"Uh, no it's okay." Tim shakes his head. You're driving.

"Put the helmet on." You say sternly as you mount your bike, sending a glare to Tim.

Something about the look you give him makes Tim grab the helmet. "Right, okay." Tim nods and puts the helmet on before he gets on the back.

"Hold on." You state before Tim holds onto your waist.

You drive to Gotham General, pulling up to one of the entrances without blocking the ambulance entrance. Tim gets off and takes off the helmet, handing it back to you. He knows you know something. And if he's being honest, he's annoyed you didn't tell him. You aren't that close but...his dad just got shot and Jason fucking Todd knew about it. It was a hit. He stood outside and did nothing. Why wouldn't his own girlfriend know he's alive and planning a hit? You have acid generation and combat clairvoyance while also being an excellent marksman. Tim swears it can't be some coincidence you were there tonight.

"I'm really sorry about your dad." You state softly, holding the helmet on your thigh.

"Thanks." Tim looks back at the hospital. "That was Jason Todd outside, wasn't it?"

You nod softly and you know you can't deny that. Tim saw him "Yeah."

"I thought he was dead." Tim questions as his voice holds hints of venom, something you haven't heard before.

"Yeah." You nod again and you hate yourself for tonight. For everything. "Don't, uh, don't tell anyone. It's a long story." You hang your head, dodging the look Tim is surely giving you.

"You knew?" Tim scoffs, looking at you with annoyance and disappointment. Why the hell would you let everyone believe he were dead? "He faked his death or?"

You look back to him and all this sucks. You're sick of lying and hiding secrets. It's tiring and lonely. It's so fucking lonely.

"No." You shake your head. "He, uh...he really, uh...he really died." You suck in a shakey breath before you shake your head quickly. "I-I can't tell you anything else." You let out a bitter scoff. "That's shit and I know that. I'm sorry."

"Did he target us because of you? Because of the Titans?" All Tim wants is some clarity. There had to be reason. Tim helped you with a code. That's what it was.

"Not a Titan." You sigh with exhaustion, lacking any and all fight you'd normally have with the statement. "I don't know why." You lie but you're sick of this. Keeping these secrets is making you out to be the bad guy with everyone and you're not. You're just trying to protect everyone you care about so, you're not going to tell him in so many words but you're not going to cover it up either. "Um...yeah...maybe it was because of me but uh...I, uh, I never...I never thought he'd figure it out or....or come after you. I should have left you out of it."

Tim nods bitterly and he wants to understand but his dad could have been killed. "That code, it wasn't a murder mystery thing, was it?" Tim asks and you just suck in a breath, not offering him anything else. Technically, you aren't lying and technically you aren't telling him anything. He already knows. You don't need to so he nods. "I saw what you did. You knew they were going to start shooting. I was right."

You shake your head, looking to the sky and it's gloomy as always but it looks like it might snow. You scoff looking back to Tim. "I saw the guns."

"Bullshit, you know," Tim gestures a hand to you. "You're supposed to be a hero, like Batman and Robin but..." Tim shakes his head.

"Fuck Batman." You mutter as your jaw clenches.

"You're supposed to help people." Tim says sternly.

The lump in your throat grows and you bite your cheek so hard the taste of iron floods your mouth. It's not supposed to be this hard. And why does helping people have to be so black and white? Good and bad? It's not. Whether anyone likes it or not, the guys you want to target and take out permanently and the guys Jason was going after, that was helping. Making sure they can't hurt anyone else ever again. That's helping. Dick thinks he can help all of the Titans and he fucks up sometimes which gets people hurt, but he still helps. Sometimes people get hurt and that sucks but does that really make everyone else irrelevant? Does that really make everything else wrong? Or the motive and reasoning?

Helping people shouldn't be black and white, good and bad, morally good and morally evil. There needs to be a grey area because you have people like the Joker who needed to be killed for the greater good of everyone in Gotham. And you have people like Jason who isn't in his right mind and is being manipulated but should still be helped. It sucks Tim's dad got shot and you will regret going to Tim for help forever, but you're helping him by not telling him anything, even if you want to and even if he doesn't see it that way.

"I am literally begging you to please go inside and leave this alone, Tim." You force the words through gritted teeth. "I can't fucking tell you anything else, okay? I want to. If it were up to me, I'd fucking tell you what's going on but I can't. It's not my shit to say." You look to the ground and then back up to Tim, rolling your shoulders softly. "So, I'm sorry." You shake your head, giving up and cluing him enough. Technically, you're not admitting to anything, just admitting that you know what's going on.

"You just confirmed it." Tim says softly. "I'm gonna figure out what's going on and--"

"Tim! Please, go be with your dad. Trust me." You practically beg him because if he digs into this, what's going to stop Jason from actually going after him? Tonight might have been a threat or whatever, but at this point, you don't know if he would actually go after someone like Tim. You need him to just take what you're saying and understand it.

"That's my dad."

"I know and I know it sucks. I get it which is why I'm telling you to go be with him." You say softly as your voice cracks.

Tim nods softly, understanding why you're saying it. "Thanks for the ride."

"Just...text me about your dad, okay?" You ask. "I'm really fucking sorry."

"I will." Tim nods because he's beginning to think maybe this isn't on you. He might know who you are but you aren't as cut and dry as Batman and Robin always were. You're more morally grey and maybe it is more complicated because it involves Jason. You look terrified. "Thanks for saving me."

You nod quickly. "Of course." You say softly. "Good luck." You suck in a breath, popping the helmet on and taking off.

prev. chapter | next chapter

series masterlist | masterlist | tag list

A/n: I still promise reader and Jason get a happy ending lmao This just had to happen lol but I do make up for it a little bit next chapter (pretty sure it's next chapter)

Tag list: @fairyofshampoo // @italiana-20 // @jasontoddsmentaldisorders // @purplerose291 // @lovelessamai  // @makaelaseresin // @lenidaslenchen // @mayfieldss  // @ghostkingblake // @im-done-with-this-im-out // @velvetskies // @lilylovelyxo // @cryinghotmess // @yesimwriting // @vivian-555 // @stainedstardom // @baebeepeach // @legend-o-zelda // @harleycao // @somehow-lovable-trash  // @xx-all-purpose-nerd-xx // @deyja-the-duck // @jasontoddslover //  @captainmarvels-blog // @totallynotkaibiased // @scarlovesyou // @whydoyoucare866 // @littlemeowmeow1000 // @ginger24880 // @septixtrash // @kplatzman // @urmomsgayforme5

[chiquititaosita]

Monster Trio + Shanks, Ace, Doing the Quebradora with Latina s/o

Hiii so this one omfg I had so much fun writing this one and I love putting my culture into this because it’ll be nice to see representation for once. Even though y/n is your name there��s not that much we know about y/n. Like WHAT ARE THEY. What’s their way of life. Yk? anyways context so quebradora is a dance usually with two people in Mexico. It’s a popular dance at bailes (dance parties) rodeos, and quinceañeras. Lots of people usually sway, it’s usually common for a girl to be picked up and swung around heres videos for references. 😭😭

Luffy

- I am sorry but luffy at first will throw you like a rag doll in reference to this video

- “ am I doing this right?!” he’s just gonna be throwing you around.

- he has two left feet for dancing. I’m serious.

-teaching him was the worst.

- when he thinks he’s got it, he’s gonna make you dislocate your hip.

-THE FACT HE USES HIS DEVIL FRUIT FOR HIS HIPS TO ONLY MOVE 💀

- “ go!!! Y/n- Chan!!!” Chopper was just cheering on zoros head

- when it came to the bailes for the island y’all landed at. He knew you seemed off when coming to the bailes with him.

- sanji, robin and nami had to catch him up. “Luffy you didn’t pay attention with y/n! When she taught you FOR THE PAST TWO WEEKS!?”

-“SO THATS WHY SHE WAS TEACHING ME THAT DANCE!?” Luffy forgot literally and felt so bad. He didn’t like seeing you sad like at all. It hurt his heart.

- “It’s in the hips luffy. You gotta do this not whatever that was that” Sanji had just corrected him after he took a puff out of his cigarette.

- he watched you trying to teach luffy on the thousand sunny he couldn’t help but laugh the whole time, but hype you up more.

“Ohhh… yeah I screwed up. Imma go make it up to her.” He ran to go find you, he found you talking to your Tia. She hugged you so tightly, after you guys catching up. you let her go and told her you’ll be back

- “y/n dance with me!!!” He grabbed your hand while laughing

-“ you serious?”

-“ yeah the songs about to start. Let’s go. I wanted to show you that I paid attention!” He flashed that gummy smile you always loved you just said fuck it let’s just have fun. Because you knew in the end luffy wouldn’t leave you.

- when y’all danced bro. He actually did it!- if that makes sense. He had to put his own twist to it.

- “luffy! LUFFY! PUT ME DOWN IM GONNA FALL!”

-“ what?! Pick you up! Don’t have to tell me twice!” This was a reminder for you teach him more dances after that. start off with cumbias or merengue. No but he didn’t. He did it the way you wanted it to happen.

- He carried you and span you around, of course y’all did a bit of hopping which was cute. In the end y’all had fun.

- the night ended with you and luffy dancing the night away as he peppered you with kisses

Zoro

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTRCxH6x5/

-now if there’s anything zoro doesn’t do. It’s dancing.

- he hates it.

-not when it’s with you he’s used to dancing with you alone in y’all’s shared quarters or on the ship

-he hates dancing in public bc it’ll ruin his “pirate hunter Image.”

-“I’m not dancing.”

-“fine I’ll just ask sanji, he’ll always say yes to me anyway.”

-“I’m gonna dance with Y/n-San?!!!” he just melted as you grabbed him to the dance floor at the baile.

- you knew how to push zoros buttons

- just as the song was about to start he grabbed your hand

-“never do that again.” He whispered into your ear while kissing the top of your head.

- seeing you smile is the only thing that matters. well besides being a pirate hunter lmao.

- when you jumped into his arms as he held you in that side to side bridal style move.

- he wanted to flip you which he did.

-“bet that curly couldn’t do that.” You giggled and kissed his cheek

- he’s now your forever dance partner. because he’s a jealous now he can say he’ll only dance with you.

“ too slow curly brows kyahaha!”this was his petty moment that he even told you some spicy things in your ear

- “Keep grinding on my knee like that, you’ll be screaming my name tonight…”

--y’all danced like the very first video. He was just trying to keep himself composed.

- you indeed couldn’t walk the next day.

-“this will be the last time you ever ask me to dance again.” he lied.

Sanji

when I decided to write about with him he’d just get all flustered it goes in two ways

- If he’s simpy he’s going to be just speaking utter nonsense or he’ll actually be shocked than process and than be his stupid self we all love

- “y-You want to dance! with me!” his eyes went into sparkles and almost passed out

- “come on I’ll teach you.”

-“you move your hips and relax, it’s gonna be like this. Is that okay?”

-he blushed furiously, “y-yeah that’s f-fine.” he looked away as wiped his bloody nose kissing his lips.

-“Y/n Chwan you’re so good at this!”

-“it’s just a dance I know.” You snorted

- when it came to the bailes, mans wanted to show you off. In which he does succeed

-the only time y’all did it successfully was the when the ship was swaying, or a tropical island.

-“you ready my darling?” he whispered and you nodded eagerly walking away from him.

- when you ran into his arms omg it felt like the whole world was just paused and only you two kept dancing.

- when he picked you up in that bridal style motion. You both touched foreheads and kissed only for a moment.

- “not bad for a cook!” you giggled as you pressed his chest against his.

-“only for you my princess.” He kissed the top of your head.

- “The way you move is sending me into heaven.” He gasps for sure, sighs in awe.

“I have been blessed by the gods!” you almost think he’s drunk when he’s saying this stuff

-“We should get married and have many babies together 😭😩💗” it’s cause of that hip thing that’s why.

- now you know why he loves that move. so whenever you dance with sanji you can tease him.

- “do you want to take a break now?”

- “ why is everyone looking at us?” Insert Confused pikachu face

-“ it’s because of your beauty and moves my sweet.” He flashed a grin against your lips. Kissing you once more.

-even if you have a fashion malfunction while dancing quebradradita.

- Sanji will I MEAN HE WILL COME THROUGH TO THE RESCUE like oh your dress ripped here. Wear my jacket.

-man can improvise and of course show you off

Shanks

- mans is a pro.

-surprisingly it was his idea and not yours 😭

- “imma throw you now!”

- “WHAT!?” your eyes widened

-“ HAHA im kidding, but imma gonna drop us down!”

-“ shanks your legs may not work the way they used to!”

-“oh really! Are you saying that I can’t do this!?”he squats down as y’all are dancing. Not gonna lie him proving himself wrong is hot as hell.

- he’s gonna show you off and than you’re gonna be light on your feet.

-“ PUT ME DOWN SHANKS SHANKS IM GONNA FALL!!!”

-“do you trust me?!”

-“No!”

-“good!” He just flips you as you scream in shock because it was out of nowhere. when you asked him to put you down nicely. you just had fun. Literally you heard his crew cheering you both

-“woah. You alright there sugar cakes?”

-you just groaned and rolled your eyes at him, as he picked you up bridal style.

-“guess that’s a no… sorry about that I got carried away.” He snorted, and kissed your temple

-“since you do so much for me I’ll take care of you tonight.”

- never have him do the quebradora. like that. Again. thank you but that’s a lie you can’t say no to him.

Ace

- imma be honest. Ace can’t dance to save his life as pirate on whitebeards crew 😭

- unlike sabo and luffy. HES GOT TWO RIGHT FEET 😭

- sabo can dance better it’s just observation according to sabo.

- “babe can I just spin you around if that counts?”

-“I don’t want to drop you.”

-“OW!”

-“ IM SORRY Y/N!” He felt guilty, and when he saw you laugh and fall on your ass he couldn’t help but laugh too

-“I love you so much.”

-“dude I’m gonna cream my pants if you keep riding my thigh like that!!”

-“why are you poking my boobs 😭”

- “And dip! Ooh now chips and queso sound good rn😩.”

- but at the end y’all had fun.

- the bailes you had fun at were cool too

- you and aced danced y’all’s little happy feet away

[mores0]

Okay, so, buckle in because I have so much to say about the first episode of Psych, and I already know that this post is going to be extremely long, haha.

So first of all, season one is one of Psych’s best seasons in my opinion, and the first episode is one of my favorites. It’s just so good. And it’s crazy how even though it’s James Roday and Dulé Hill’s first episode, they act like they’ve already known each other and been friends for years- their chemistry is amazing right off the bat.

And Shawn and Gus’ characterizations in this episode are amazing, because as the show goes on they really got watered down, but in this episode- it was amazing. Shawn in this episode was so- I don’t know if this is the right word- but angsty, I guess. And I kind of like it honestly. Lassiter’s ex partner was like “You never know when to give up, don’t you?” And he said something like “Oh, I give up all the time, but only when the moment’s right,” or something like that, and as a “gifted” kid, I felt that. Lmao. And- there’s more that I want to talk about- but I’ll come back around to it later- hang in there.

And Gus is the best. I am Gus on a spiritual level. He has anxiety, (which is actually confirmed because he takes anxiety medication apparently, I didn’t know that). He says that he doesn’t want any part of what Shawn was doing, but he secretly wanted to so bad and Shawn knows that, and said all the right things to give Gus the push he needed to just go for it. And he was having the time of his life, even if he said that he wasn’t. Even when he was running away from the dead bodies screaming, which definitely would’ve been me in that situation, lmao. And then when Shawn solved the case and they were both let go, he had the smuggest little smile on his face, because he knew that Shawn could do it. “Just one more day.” Yeah right, he knew fully well that he was going to do it with Shawn for as long as possible lmao, you’re not fooling anybody.

And then there was Henry and Shawn’s dysfunctional father-son relationship- which even in the first episode is very prominent. And that’s literally how the show started- first scene ever, and it was Shawn doing the hat thing and Henry saying “yeah, that’s adequate.” That pisses me off haha, sorry to everyone who likes Henry. I respect that and can definitely see why people would feel that way- but I just don’t like him very much, haha. Additionally, Shawn didn’t even know that his dad had already been back for a year or so, and they didn’t seem too happy to see each other again which was rough. And later on when Shawn did the hat thing again and even like, noticed things that Henry didn’t, he smiled for a second, which Shawn seemed to be happy about and they could’ve had a moment before Henry ruined it by saying something like “Whatever, you got lucky,” and how he was a disappointment, etc, and then they went back to being angry at each other, which is their main issue I think. Shawn wants Henry’s, I don’t know, approval. He wants that “good job,” but Henry doesn’t want to give it.

And then there’s Lassiter and Shawn’s talk about his arrest, and Shawn brought up that his dad did that so that he could teach him a lesson, so Lassiter was like “Well did you learn it?” And Shawn replied, “I learned that I hated my father.” Which fucking hit me so hard lmao. But then- there’s another scene later on which nobody talks about where Shawn is talking to Mr.McCallum about how he was familiar with disappointing his dad, and how McCallum killed his son, and Shawn spoke about how it was because his son kept letting him down time and time again, before saying that he’d change and he’ll be different, but then just let him down again and how it was the needle that broke the camel’s back- and he was so obviously talking about himself, and that scene was just so raw. I’m losing my mind over it.

Also, I loved officer Allan so much even though she only got, like, two scenes, haha. I wish that she got more than one episode. And it was weird not to see Juliet in this one, haha.

Anyways, there’s so many other scenes that I love, like the shooting range scene, the scene with the guy sneezing on the chicken, Shawn showing Gus the office, Shawn telling the guy to get rid of the shards on his sleeves only for him to brush them onto his leg and boot. Shawn pretending to be Psychic for the first time and working through it. Basically, the entire episode, lmao.

And, yeah, that’s everything I have to say I think. And if you could leave your own thoughts in like, the comments/ a reblog, that would be really cool. Have a nice day. (And sorry that this is so long, lmao).

[fallinforerling]

LOVE ISN'T ETERNAL... but maybe ours is. final chapter - jb

A/N: Tada! Here it is. The end of an era! Can you believe it? I hope you all liked it. Thank you all for liking my writing and following me, sending messages and support. I'm so grateful for all of you. Love ya always xx

* The photos are pure inspiration! Not true representation of any of the characters.

ೃ⁀➷ jude’s masterlist

ೃ⁀➷ jude’s taglist

ೃ⁀➷ masterlist

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

♡ three months later ♡

footballgossip

♡ judemylove, universalfootball and 534,320 more

footballgossip It appears that rumors involving BVB star Jude Bellingham and the mysterious girl that has been seen at recent games are true! The youngster confirmed his long-term relationship with his girlfriend on his IG after today's game! What do you guys think?

Follow @footballgossippp for more info about your favorite players!

loviejude omg wtf, i KNEW he was with someoneeeee

bvbjude i mean... we all knew. this girl has been on his games and jobe's ig for a WHILE now

judesgirl YAAAY. i'm so happy for him!!!

— The article spread like fire, and on the first fifteen minutes of being out, you'd received it more times that you could count. It was a bit overwhelming, but you knew it was coming. Since the day you two got out of the stadium holding hands, everyone knew Jude Bellingham had a girlfriend. And even thought just a tiny circle of people actually knew your name, everyone knew your face.

So you decided to soft-lauch yourself into the public eye. Well, officially. The first step was to make your IG public, and then posting the photos you took after the game. You did it first, thinking that Jude will do something similar to your style.

yourinstagram

♡ nikkiwikki, mia_d, judebellingham, jobebellingham, gioareyna and 760,880 more

yourinstagram my winner ♡ i'm so proud of who you are, your achievements and having you by my side. love you forever

judebellingham i love you so so so much

jobebellingham disgustingly beautiful, love you guys xx

nikkiwikki i knew it

mia_d me and who

gioreyna 👀

judeforever omgksjdkdnfnff i can't

bellinghamnow she's a real one 🫶🏻 we love you queen

judesbaddie can jude fight??? lmao

bellinghammm i'm tired of being singleeeee 🥹

— After seeing the (mostly) positive response from everyone, you felt relieved. Jude was next to you, “giving it the last touches” as he said, then after hitting post, he gave you the proudest look ever.

“I'm so good.” Was the only thing he said, smiling.

“Let's see.”

judebellingham

♡ yourinstagram, jobebellingham, gioareyna, erling.haaland and 1,346,590 more

judebellingham date night with the love of my life. i'll never shut up about you and how much i love you. having you by my side it's the biggest achievement ever. love you forever xx

yourinstagram omg i'm the love of his life 🥹

jobebellingham bring me dessert pls

yourinstagram you're ruining the mood bro

jobe2005 nah, jobe is wilding on their comments like pls 😭

judeforever i didn't want to cry at 2 am but oh well

bvb awwww

judebellingham i know right 🥹 she's beautiful

jb22 girl, if that man doesn't treat you right I CAN

“You call that soft launching me?” You laughed, kicking him just a bit on the leg.

“I was very subtle, my love.” He said, catching your leg and dragging you across the sofa until you were almost on top of him. “At least I didn't called you my future wife.”

You blushed, hating and loving at the same time how much he has been hinting and joking about proposing. You didn't know how to feel.

— Now that you felt more confident about posting every single photo available of Jude, you did it as much as you could. Everyone loved it, not only your close ones, but Jude's fans, thanking you for giving them more content.

You never imagined yourself enjoying the fact of having a public relationship. But it never was about the attention, but the freedom of wanting to post and being able to do so.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

— You lowered your phone after seeing the most recent story he posted, smiling at your boyfriend with such force that you thought your face was going to split in half. 

“Ready?” He hugged you as tight as he could. “The reservation is waiting for us.”

“I'm always ready for dinner.” You said, giggling when he started to kiss your face. “I love you.”

He caressed your face, looking into your eyes for a few seconds before kissing you again. 

“I love you even more.” He finally replied, twirling you around. 

It was such a wonderful night with the most wonderful boyfriend ever. 

Thank God for second chances.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

— After dinner with friends... And family, you didn't know what to say. It was so shocking that all you could do was see the photos Jobe, Nikki, Mia and Denise were sending you one after another.

✉️ Nikki: Post this one!!!

✉️ Mia: NO! This one has better lighting

✉️ Jobe: As the newest member of the group chat, I order it to be this one I personally took

✉️ Nikki: Excuuuuuseeee me?

✉️ lmaoooo, guys don't fight!!!

✉️ Nikki: He started it!

yourinstagram

♡ judebellingham, nikkiwikki, mia_d, jobebellingham and 2,456,789 more

yourinstagram getting married i guess (i love you darling)

judebellingham i love you more bro 💕

jobebellingham it was my idea, you're welcome

yourinstagram say what now? 😳

nikkiwikki and my photos won

bvb congrats to the beautiful bride to be!

yourinstagram thank youuuu 🥹🫶🏻

mia_d what was more culturally significant? the renaissance or my best friend getting engaded?

judebellingham our engagement, of course

judebellingham

♡ yourinstagram, jobebellingham, erling.haaland and 2,395,684 more

judebellingham proposed to my girlfriend i guess

yourinstagram biggest plot twist ever

judebellingham you didn't saw it coming lmao

yourinstagram shut up (with love)

jobebellingham again, my idea

judebellingham bro! shhhhh

erling.haaland congrats my brother!

judebellingham thank you sir!

jb22 damn, someone took my bitch lmaoooo. congrats babiessssss

bellinghammm OMFNSKDKSKDD

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚*ੈ✩‧₊˚⋆·˚ ༘ * JUDE'S TAGLIST

@mentalbaddie | @taintedstranger | @mrs-dasilvasantoss | @mbapbaesluvr | @erensfavgirly | @cinderellawithashoe | @yoitsmo07 | @seajjin | @kakuchosbff | @peterparkerbae | @alwaysclassyeagle | @itsjuspenny-blog | @lbsmainblog | @youngjayla | @freetimemachinequeen | @chaeryeongstuff | @lazyreadergirl | @trentismine | @ironmaiden1313 | @wavessmile | @jul1ettt | @daydream-er | @citrusjunosart | @pierre-gasssllyy | @avianawrites | @topguncultleader

[thegreymoon]

The Story of Minglan

So, she's still alive, smh.

The ONE thing I was asking for from this rebellion and they couldn't even give me that 😠

***

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

Didn't your actual WIFE die yesterday? Aren't you supposed to be in mourning, for appearance's sake at least?

I thought we were done with him and his nonsense but apparently not.

***

She was only PRETENDING?

Why won't this drama let me have good things 😭😭

***

LMAOOOO

Baby is here to take back his home! He is now best buddies with the new Emperor, evil stepmom can seethe 🤣🤣

***

Are you kidding me?

I thought she would have more dignity and be openly hostile, not fawn over him so blatantly.

As if he would fall for her act twice.

***

Their faces, LMAO 🤣🤣

***

LMAO

Adult!Gu Tingye never really made it onto my list of favourite characters but I absolutely love how Feng Shaofeng plays him 🤣🤣 He's so smooth and charming, an absolute rascal! He smiles and I smile, no matter whether it's genuine or not!

***

Well, in my view, with all their money and lack of boundaries, these wastrel young masters could be doing much worse, such as raping and murdering (like the gentlemen from the Fourth and Fifth Gu house did in their time).

Third Brother is at least only out supporting the economy by frequenting brothels and hopefully paying the sex workers well. The Song Empire should send him an Imperial decree expressing its gratitude.

***

This is the full irony of her evildoing.

And even if he did not yield the title, what could she have possibly wanted that he would not have given?? She and her incompetent son had it made! But no. Nothing is enough when you're born too greedy for your own good.

***

Eh... not quite, but almost.

I am fascinated by these people. "We have spent your whole life hating you and ruining your life for no good reason, but how dare you not love us in return?"

LOLOLOLOL

Even Lin Qinshuang had more shame.

***

I live for beautiful scenery in c-dramas 💚

***

WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU ARE NOT TAKING THE EXAM?

I'm more invested in him passing this exam than I am in me passing any of mine, which is obvious from the amount of time I spent watching his shenanigans instead of studying 😕

***

Cackling 🤣🤣

He's always so outraged by the lack of propriety 🤣🤣

I love the two of them, they are such a good pair! One is so proper and the other so improper!

***

LMAO, yes, panic 🤣🤣

It's episode 36, you loser! How long do you expect the girl to wait for you? You had better hurry!

***

God, this is nice 😭😭

I wish I had the skill to turn this into art! 💚

***

Oh, yes, it is the Old Madam you are eager to visit 🙄

IDK why, but he gives me the ick.

He hasn't really done anything wrong but he's always so nice and kind and sweet and subservient, plus he's not the OTP. All the alarm bells in my head are RINING!!

***

WHO THE FUCK?

I knew there was something shady about him, smh.

***

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

Where do all these cockroaches come from?? Are there no single men in China to marry and you must go after someone who already has a wife??

I AM MAD.

***

LMAO, he at least has the decency to be shocked.

So, he is not on board this nonsense. Good. But is that what happens to screw up his marriage to Minglan? His family insists on him marrying this woman?

[here2bbtstrash]

look down on me like that - 5 (explicit)

genre: slow burn enemies to lovers hatefucking coworkers au, smut (w some eventual angst)

pairing: yoongi x reader

summary: your asshole coworker min yoongi has made it his personal mission to ruin your life.

word count: 11.4k (you're welcome 😌)

contains: ~explicit sexual content~ !! *deep breath in* YES THERE IS ACTUAL FUCKING HAPPENING - EVERYONE REMAIN CALM. also i promise this is the most unhinged reader gets lmao. alright let's go: one night stand/stranger sex, semi-public sex (bathroom of a bar), fingering, spanking, a truly gratuitous blowjob, orgasm denial, a smidge of dirty talk/namecalling, finger sucking?, protected sex, semi-awkward sex lmao, the hatefucking is HERE 🙌🏻 plenty of alcohol mentions as always,, so much alcohol. this chapter also features a couple fun cameos - kihyun of monsta x and wonho 💜

A/N: hope y'all enjoy this absolute CHAOS!! i have so many lovely friends who cheered me on while i was writing this, far too many to name, but i fucking adore you all 🥺🥺 and i do want to specifically shoutout @kiestrokes because the ~spicy twist~ in this chapter would not be HALF as good if it wasn't for her and her big beautiful brain. srsly she took a half-baked idea i had and made it insane. god i love that woman. ALRIGHT ENOUGH BABBLING - ENJOY!!!!!

read on AO3!

chapter four | masterlist | chapter six

~*~

“Try this.” Jimin yanks an emerald green dress off the hanger and chucks it over his shoulder, nearly hitting you.

“Ugh, I hate this one,” you groan as you hold the offending item up for inspection, pinched between index finger and thumb. “The fabric is so itchy.” 

Your best friend whips around, hands on hips, when you question his taste. “I’m sorry, did I just hear you going back on our agreement? Is that what this is?”

You groan, flopping over onto your bedspread, doing your best not to mess up your hair. Jimin had, understandably, been pissed when you’d called him immediately upon leaving the office last night, hands still shaking as you cradled the phone against your cheek. You think you have permanent hearing damage from the anguished wails your best friend made as you finally admitted everything you hadn’t told him. And you certainly could have done without the appreciative noises he made after he forced you to describe Suga’s dick in explicit detail. 

It’s not like you aren’t constantly thinking about it, anyway.

Especially now that Yoongi has specifically told you everything, everything he wants to do to you. The words swim back to you in pieces whenever you aren’t actively trying to suppress the memory. Finger that tight little pussy. Spank you until you bruise. Fuck you like the slut you so clearly are.

God. You’ve been horny for 24 hours straight. This can’t be good for your health.

Jimin had nearly disowned you for letting secrecy infiltrate your friendship for the first time in over a decade, but then he’d realized how truly distraught you were as you just kept babbling into the phone about Suga, too far gone to make any sense.

“Jesus fucking christ, it’s not the end of the world!” He’d finally interrupted with a frustrated groan. “You really think Suga is the only man in the world who can fuck you senseless? He was probably overselling it anyway. Having a pretty dick doesn’t guarantee he knows what to do with it.”

At this point you’d stumbled onto the bus home, and you remember smacking your forehead against the cold glass of the window with a whine at the words pretty dick, your mind already departing on another Yoongi spiral.

Jimin’s peal of laughter rang in your ears. “I’ve never heard you down this bad in my life, good god girl! We just need to get you laid so your fucking brain can work right again.”

“Please,” you’d grunted.

“Alright, I’m coming over tomorrow, and we’re going out.” He’d paused then, and you knew there was more even before he continued. It was like you could hear his evil smile. “And I get to pick your outfit.”

You’re snapped out of the memory as a second dress is tossed your way, this one hitting you square in the face.

“Either the green or this one. You’re still in the doghouse, ma’am,” Jimin reminds you.

You pull the second option up to examine it, already grateful for the softer feel of the material. Jimin loves to put you in shit that you’d never wear— usually dresses that he bought for you, or bullied you into buying. You think you already dress pretty racy when you go out, but Jimin likes to take it to another level, always encouraging you to show more skin, more tits, more ass. He’s definitely responsible for this number even being in your closet: dark burgundy in color, it’s tight, short, and the cutouts leave very little to the imagination.

You whine softly despite yourself. “Do I have to? I’m going to freeze to death.”

Jimin has already moved to sit at your desk, examining his hair in the mirror you use to do your makeup. He’s in one of his favorite going-out shirts, one he claims “makes even the straight boys look twice”, a blue and white striped button down with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. He doesn’t even bother making eye contact with you as he peers at his reflection, fiddling with the silver hoops in his ears. “I dunno. Depends on whether or not you value my friendship.”

You roll your eyes at his dramatics. “I can’t stand you.”

“Will you shut up and put your damn freakum dress on already?” He rummages through your makeup bag without asking until he finds what he’s looking for, a tube of Fenty gloss that he dabs in the center of his bottom lip.

“That is not what freakum dress means,” you say with a laugh as you stand to strip out of your sweats, but he’s already reaching for his phone that’s connected to your Bluetooth speaker, another requirement for the evening in order to keep your friendship intact. Beyoncé starts to blast as you pull your shirt over your head and suck in for dear life.

“So, what exactly is the plan?” You ask as soon as you swallow down another shot, nearly shouting to be heard over the noise of the bar. Jimin made you do a couple in your kitchen before you left, and though you haven’t even been out for an hour, you’re already straddling the line between tipsy and drunk.

He shoots you a look. “Don’t act so innocent, like I haven’t personally seen you go home with random dudes.”

Your gaze flits over the mass of bodies out on the dance floor. “I mean, yeah, but…” You shrug, grimacing slightly. “I don’t know, it’s been a while. And we’re not in college anymore.”

“What about him?” You look back at Jimin and he nods his head behind you. You do your best to be subtle as you glance over your shoulder to see two guys a couple of tables away.

“Which one?”

Jimin makes a face like it’s obvious. “Are you kidding me? The absolutely built daddy with the red hair?”

You examine them more closely, scrunching your nose up a little. He’s cute, big as hell, and you certainly notice his bubble butt in those tight pants. But it just doesn’t feel right. “I don’t know that he’s my type.” When your gaze lands on his friend, dressed in all black, dark hair skimming over his eyes as he leans in to say something, your heart flips in your chest. Now that could work.

Turning back to Jimin to say as much, you realize that he’s already brushing past you. “Well I’m not stupid,” he scoffs, and you scramble to follow after him as he stalks confidently across the room.

He’s already talking to them when you catch up. “Hi boys. Care for some company?”

They glance at each other, and you can tell Jimin’s presence is clearly unexpected but not unwelcome. He wasn’t wrong: nobody can resist him in that damn shirt.

“Sure,” red-haired daddy says with a shy giggle, and you have to bite back a smile. You were not expecting a guy that built to react so softly, and you already know your best friend is going feral on the inside. There is nothing Jimin loves more than a man he can fluster. Especially one who can make him pay for it.

His friend flags down a server and orders a round of shots for the table, then gives you a small wave as Jimin takes the liberty of giving his name and yours. “I’m Kihyun.”

“Hoseok,” Jimin's target is clearly squirming under his intense gaze. “But my friends call me Wonho.”

“Can I be your friend?” Jimin purrs. You’re nearly laughing at how quickly he lost the plot of trying to get you laid, but he’s also such an intense flirt that it nearly works as a wingman maneuver, in its own weird way.

You scoot a little closer to Kihyun as Jimin and Wonho disappear into their own conversation. Up close you can really admire how attractive he is, full lips and a wickedly sharp jawline.

“Hi,” you say with a smile, surprised to find yourself slightly nervous despite the alcohol coursing through your system.

“Hi,” he says back, and he looks like he’s about to say more when the server reappears with a tray of four shots.

“Thanks again for these,” you say as you reach for one, and he waves it off. You glance over at Jimin and Wonho, assuming they might want to toast as a group, but Jimin is already hooking his elbow around Wonho’s ridiculous bicep and making a not-at-all-subtle comment about how big he is, intertwining their arms before they each throw the shot back.

You look at Kihyun again, who is biting his lip nervously, and you can feel your face heat up. You’re no Jimin, so you settle for gently tapping your shot glass against his. “Cheers.”

He echoes the sentiment and you down your drinks simultaneously. You shiver a little as you swallow, but you’ve had enough that you don’t even feel the burn of the alcohol.

“So,” Kihyun’s eyes flit over to Jimin, then return to you. “Do you two come here a lot?”

You shrug. “We rotate. Jimin likes this place more than I do. You?”

He laughs softly. “Not really. Honestly, we’re both homebodies, but we try to get out every so often. Always nice to meet new people.” It’s so quick you nearly miss it, but you swear his eyes jump down your figure and back up again.

You try to ignore the little voice in your head reminding you of another pair of eyes; dark, calculating, wandering over your body. Not now.

“I couldn’t agree more,” you say, because it’s true: a new person is definitely what you need in this moment.

Before you can ask a follow-up question, you hear Jimin, talking loudly so that he’s audible over the music. “Your thighs look so good in those pants!” You have to resist the urge to smack your head against the table when you look over to see him attempting— and absolutely failing— to wrap his small hands around the circumference of Wonho’s leg, who is giggling like a schoolgirl.

You glance back at Kihyun, who is equally enraptured. “I’m so sorry,” you say quietly. “He is unfortunately always like this.”

“You know where else those thighs would look good?” Jimin’s voice lowers as he asks the question, and you watch Kihyun’s eyes go wide.

“Do you want to dance?” You say quickly, and he nods so fast you think his head might fall off. You start to break away from the group, his hand slipping to your waist, when Jimin smacks the table so loud that it makes you jump.

“Hey!” He yells, and you turn back, but he’s pointing at Kihyun, who instantly looks terrified. He leans in, as if to divulge confidential information, and Kihyun takes a tentative step towards him.

“Just so you’re aware,” Jimin starts, and you know it’s going to be bad. “She needs to get dicked down. Severely. Hope you’re ready.”

You close your hand around Kihyun’s wrist and drag him towards the dance floor, eager for a distraction to keep you from murdering your best friend.

Now that you’re actually in motion, you can feel the last couple of shots quickly catching up to you, the room blurring slightly at the edges. At the center of the dance floor, the thudding bass is loud enough to make it hard to think, which is exactly what you need right now.

You’re grateful not to have to force any more conversation, both of Kihyun’s hands slipping to your hips as you start to move in time to the music. It gives you free reign to admire him up close, and damn, he really is gorgeous. He’s only a little taller than you in your heels— probably about the same height as Yoongi, though his frame is slighter, smaller. You watch as his dark hair falls into his eyes again and he reaches up to sweep it off his forehead— Yoongi’s hair is a little longer, and he certainly has much better hands, but other than that—

You have to squeeze your eyes shut when you realize what the fuck you're doing. The whole point of this encounter is to stop thinking about Yoongi. Not pick apart this absolute stranger in comparison to him.

You desperately wish you could get another drink, but you know that would push you all the way into “drunk” territory. As much as you hate admitting it, Jimin was right: you really need to be able to consent to sex tonight. You’re gonna have to get through this the old-fashioned way, with sheer fucking willpower.

“Are you okay?”

Your eyes flutter open to meet Kihyun’s concerned gaze. “Yeah, yeah, sorry. Just, uh. Thinking about work.” Not a complete lie.

“Well, don’t,” he says with a soft laugh. “It’s the weekend. You should enjoy it.” His hands press a little tighter, pulling you close until your body is flush with his. His breath ghosts over your neck as you hear his voice in your ear. “That dress looks really good on you.”

A different voice echoes in your mind before you can stop it. Spread your legs for me. Show me what’s under that dress. You can’t help but wonder if this is what it feels like to literally go insane, and then you grab Kihyun’s face with both hands and kiss him in a desperate attempt to not think anymore.

You can feel him freeze, clearly not expecting it, but after a second his mouth starts to move against yours. His hands slip further down towards your ass, and fuck, it occurs to you that you are still incredibly horny. You need this to happen as soon as possible.

Pulling away and sliding your hands to Kihyun’s shoulders, you tilt up to speak into his ear. “Do you live near here?”

His eyes go wide for at least the third time tonight. “Y-yeah, not far.” You see his tongue dart out to lick his lips.

“I don’t know how to say this politely,” you admit with an embarrassed smile. “But my friend wasn’t wrong. About… what I need.”

He pauses for a moment, and your stomach twists as you prepare for rejection, the reasonable reaction considering you basically jumped this man like a crazy person. But then he smiles, leaning into you so he can keep his tone soft. “Come on, then.”

You follow Kihyun as he guides you towards the exit, keeping one hand pressed to the small of your back. It’s hard to miss the other half of your group making their way through the crowd— Wonho is large enough that people quickly shrink to get out of his way, but his gaze is entirely transfixed on Jimin’s ass in front of him. You nod in their direction and Kihyun follows as you push past bodies to reunite.

“Are you leaving?!” Jimin asks, and you can only nod. His eyes jump to Kihyun. “I told you, you better give it to her!” He shouts it so loudly that people standing behind him glance over their shoulders, but he is fully unfazed, now brandishing his cellphone. “And I always have her location on, so if you murder her, I will come find you!”

With a roll of your eyes, you lean across the circle so that Wonho can hear you. “Take good care of him, okay?” When you pull away, you swear he’s blushing as red as his hair, and he nods sheepishly.

You turn back to Kihyun. “Ready?”

The door to Kihyun’s apartment barely has time to close behind you before you find his lips with yours again. He presses you up against the wall of the entryway, and you waste no time in moving your hands over his body. His shirt and pants hit the floor in quick succession.

When he reaches for the hem of your dress, you cover his hands with yours to stop him. “Do you— is it okay if I keep it on?”

“Yeah,” he murmurs, breathless. “Yeah, okay.”

He kisses you again and you let him guide you backwards through an open door into his bedroom until you feel the mattress hit the backs of your knees. You perch on the edge of the bed and glance around the room, taking it in. It’s clean, if minimally furnished, and your stomach flips when you see a nondescript work desk tucked into one corner.

You look at Kihyun when you feel his hand gently rub your thigh, encouraging you to spread your legs.

“Kihyun?”

“Yeah?”

Your gaze jumps to his desk, then back to him. “Do— uh… Do you think you could bend me over your desk?”

He seems a little dumbfounded, and takes a second to find words. “Wh— I— yeah, yes, I can do that. I just—” he clears his throat. “Do you need, like, foreplay, or…?”

You stand up again, knees shaking slightly. “I’ll tell you what to do, does that work?”

It must, because he kisses you, eventually starting to move towards the desk. When you’ve gotten far enough, you feel him tug at your hips, encouraging you to spin around so your back is flush with his chest. His hand slides up to your shoulders to gently press you forward, and you brace your forearms on the desk, already breathless.

“P-pull my dress up,” you manage to instruct. His hands caress over your thighs, then move to the hem of your dress, pushing up until your ass is fully exposed for him.

Get a good look at that ass you were tempting me with, the voice in your head finishes for you. You squeeze your eyes shut, trying to focus on this moment, this man. Not any others.

You look back at Kihyun over your shoulder in an attempt to stay present, spreading your legs a little wider. “Touch me.”

He slowly moves a hand from your thigh up towards your core, and you feel his fingers just barely brush over the fabric of your underwear. The rush of contact after so much anticipation is enough to make you shiver slightly, but his touch is so light, so gentle.

Gentle is not what you need right now.

Keeping yourself held up on one arm, you reach the other behind you to forcefully tug your panties to the side. “Your fingers, Kihyun,” you hiss.

You tip your head forward and swallow down a whine of relief as he presses a digit into you and starts to rub circles. “How’s that?” His voice purrs in your ear, and you whimper as you nod.

It feels good, especially when he adds a second finger, but it’s not enough. He’s too soft, too tentative.

You look back at him again. “Can you spank me?”

You’ve officially lost count of the number of times you’ve surprised this man tonight. “I— what?”

“Like, smack my ass?”

“Like this?” He asks, but you barely feel it when he brings his hand down over your ass.

“Harder,” you say almost instantly, realizing after the fact that you could probably stand to be a little nicer to this random stranger. “Please.”

Kihyun’s second attempt is better, enough to make you groan softly as the sensation of the sting mixes with the movements of his fingers pressing against your front wall. He does it again, harder still, and you wiggle your ass back towards him— you need more, more than his hands can give.

“Kihyun,” you gasp, “want you to fuck me.”

“Yeah? I’ll fuck you right here,” he grunts. At least he seems to be genuinely into it, you think to yourself gratefully. He smacks your ass a final time and you bite down on your lip as he withdraws his fingers. “One second.”

You hear the sound of him opening a drawer somewhere in his room and retrieving a condom, and you let your eyes flutter closed until his hands brush over your hips again.

“Ready?”

“Yes, Kihyun, please,” you beg, your head dropping down onto your forearms. “Please fuck me.” Desire is wound up so tight inside you that you can’t think about anything else; you need this so fucking badly.

He makes a strangled whine as he presses into you, and you move your hips back onto him, gasping slightly at the stretch. “Fuck.”

“God, you feel so fucking good,” Kihyun groans, and he starts to roll into you with steady thrusts that brush the head of his cock right over your g-spot. You push backwards, matching his rhythm, and he’s not wrong: it feels good.

But it’s not enough.

“Harder,” you groan, your voice muffled in the crook of your elbow, and you hear Kihyun grunt as he picks up the pace, hips snapping against your ass. Better, but somehow still not what you need.

“Please, Kihyun,” you encourage again. “Fuck me like a slut.”

“Jesus,” he breathes, and for a second, you wonder if you’ve finally broken him. But then his hand cracks over your ass, hard enough to take you by surprise, and he starts to thrust even faster.

“Is this what you want?” He asks, and his voice is tense, almost angry; something about it makes your walls start to flutter. Your orgasm is so frustratingly close, yet somehow beyond your grasp.

And then you hear that all-too familiar voice in your head. I want to make you come so hard that your legs shake. Before you can help it, you moan a little at the memory. The way Yoongi leveled his gaze on you as he spoke so calmly, in a way that had you believing every single word. You can feel your core starting to tighten at the very thought, and once your brain realizes that’s what will get you there, it’s like the fucking floodgates open.

“Oh fuck,” you groan, and you can hear him grunt in agreement, like he’s close, too.

You’re helpless to stop it now, too desperate to come. Yoongi���s voice, his face, his tongue, his hands, his cock. It’s all you can think of. You gasp as everything inside you tightens and starts to pulse.

“Shit, shit, I’m gonna come,” you whine. So hard that you have no choice but to scream my name as I wreck you, the voice in your head finishes, and you dig your nails into the desk beneath you as you reach your climax.

Your back arches, pleasure washing over you, and you cry out. “Yes, Yoongi, yes!”

There’s a moment where his hips stutter, and then he pushes all the way into you one last time with a grunt of effort as he comes, too. Your heartbeat starts to slow.

And then it occurs to you that the man fucking you is absolutely not named Yoongi, and you smack a hand over your mouth.

“Oh my god,” you say softly, voice muffled, and you remove your hand as you start to straighten up. You can hear Kihyun still breathing heavily behind you, but he’s otherwise silent as he releases his grip on your hips and slides out of you.

“Kihyun,” you turn to watch him cross the room to the en-suite bathroom, where he briefly disappears to dispose of the condom. Face burning with embarrassment, you awkwardly maneuver to readjust your underwear and pull your dress back down over your ass.

When he reappears in the doorway, you try again. “Kihyun, I am so sorry. I—I don’t—” you fumble for what to say, knowing full well you don’t have a good explanation. At least not one that doesn’t make you sound insane.

“It’s cool,” he says, but he’s clearly uncomfortable. “I mean, you know. Shit happens.”

You glance around nervously for your phone before realizing it’s back on the table in the entryway where you tossed it in the throes of passion. You shoot Kihyun a weak smile. “I should— let me call Jimin. I can get a ride home.”

Kihyun laughs dryly. “Yeah, I’m gonna take a wild guess that he might be a little busy. I can take you home. It’s not a big deal.”

As much as your pride wants to refuse, you don’t exactly have a backup plan. “I would really appreciate that,” you murmur.

The drive is silent and painfully awkward, Kihyun turning up the music just loud enough that you get the indication that he doesn’t want to talk. As the lights of the city stream by, you can’t help but wonder how everything got so fucked up.

When Kihyun pulls up to your apartment complex, you indicate where he can drop you off, and he reaches over you as the car slows to a stop to politely open the door.

“Have a good night,” he says firmly, and you can barely manage a word of thanks before you slip out of his car and head up the stairs to die of embarrassment.

Jimin shows up at your door late Sunday afternoon, a takeout bag of haejangguk tucked under one arm, gushing incessantly about the various ways Wonho threw him around all night. It feels like he babbles for an hour, until he finally takes a break to sip from his own container of soup, and prompts you with a raise of his eyebrows.

“Your turn. Was your mission successful?”

You keep your gaze firmly planted on the floor as you recount what happened.

“Oh, you’ve got to be fucking kidding me.”

~*~

Jimin decides that you’ll try again next weekend, promising he’ll be less distracted. You’re not positive you’ll survive that long. You preemptively text Jungkook asking to take the week off from boxing class - your stomach is such a fucking bundle of nerves that you barely sleep at all Sunday night, and you know the next five days spent in constant fear of running into Yoongi is only going to make it worse.

Those same nerves creep up into your throat when you unlock the doors Monday morning, Jungkook waiting patiently behind you with his hands wrapped around the straps of his backpack.

Dread blooms inside of you as you move to place your purse on your desk, and then you make a split-second decision, spinning back to face Jungkook.

“Hey, JK?” The nickname is unplanned, just sort of comes out, but you see him visibly brighten. “Are there any open desks on your side of the office? I think I need a change of scenery.”

He nods, eyes wide. “Yeah! I’m actually all by myself right now. Sunye is on maternity leave for the rest of the month. You can use her desk.”

You gesture for him to lead the way and he does, heading past the break room and walking backwards down the hallway to keep talking to you. “Is there something wrong with your normal desk? We can always put in a work order.”

“Uh, no,” you scramble, trying to find a good excuse. “It can just be a little distracting, you know. People coming in and out all day. I’ve got a lot of stuff I need to be heads-down on this week.”

The excuse sounds flimsy and false to you, but he seems to buy it. “Yeah, makes sense! I’ll try not to distract you too much.”

He does a full 360-degree spin on his heels as you turn the corner at the end of the hall, and it’s enough to make you laugh softly despite yourself. There’s a small alcove with a desk pressed against either wall, and you don’t even have to ask which one is Jungkook’s. The standing desk is dotted with tell-tale signs of Baby Star Candy: an empty shaker cup, a mini tub of protein powder, several fidget toys tucked beneath his monitor. A small collage of polaroids is taped to the wall where you see him smiling with friends, throwing up a peace sign in nearly every single one.

Sunye’s desk is mostly empty, save for a few framed photos of her with her husband and two young kids. You drop your purse down and take a seat as Jungkook chucks his backpack under his desk, both of you reaching to retrieve your laptops.

Outlook hasn’t even loaded before he’s turned around and talking to you again. “So how was your weekend?”

You grimace reflexively at memories you’d rather forget, and Jungkook misinterprets the look. “Oh, sorry, no distractions. I’ll be quiet.”

“No, no,” you shake your head. “It’s not you. My weekend was fine. What about yours?”

He laughs, looking a little embarrassed. “I mean, honestly? I’m super addicted to this new mobile game that just came out. I feel like I blinked and lost two days.” He’s already reaching for his cellphone. “Want to see?” You roll your chair across to his side of the room as Jungkook leans over to show you the little island world he’s nearly 500 levels into. After a few minutes, he seems to remember himself.

“Shit, you specifically said you came here to focus. I’m sorry, I really will leave you alone now.”

You bite down on your bottom lip. “No, it’s okay, JK. I— honestly, I wasn’t being entirely truthful when I said that. I don’t mind the distraction at all, actually. It’s kind of complicated, but… it would be nice if I could hide out here for the foreseeable future.”

He looks at you, clearly surprised. “Of course. Whatever you need. Is everything okay?”

You wince a little, with no idea how to answer that question.

His voice drops. “Is it Suga?”

“It’s complicated.” You repeat with a sigh.

An unfamiliar emotion flashes in Jungkook’s eyes. You’ve never seen him angry before, but you’d guess this is what it looks like. “Hey, seriously, if he’s being aggressive with you, we should do something about it. Report it or something.”

You have to suppress the urge to laugh in his face. Like Yoongi being aggressive with you isn’t exactly what you’ve been fantasizing about for days.

“No, it’s not like that,” you reassure him. “I think we’re just two people who are better off kept apart from each other. That’s all.”

Jungkook nods slowly, and it’s clear from his expression that he wants to pry more, but is forcing himself not to. “Okay.”

There’s a heaviness of unasked and unanswered questions in the air, but the two of you manage to lapse into corporate smalltalk as you roll back over to your desk and dive into your workday.

Jungkook eventually has to peel off for a few virtual meetings, and watching him work is its own source of entertainment. If it’s a meeting that requires his focus, you can tell because he leans in close to his monitor, staring at spreadsheets or data visualizations with a look on his face like he’s using every single brain cell he owns. 

You can also tell when he’s put on calls where he clearly isn’t needed, because he’ll spin in a full circle at his desk with a glazed over look in his eye. There are even a few times where you glance up to see him silently doing what you vaguely recognize as TikTok dances, and you have to clap a hand over your mouth to keep from outright laughing.

The day rolls on, and you’re neck deep in drafting a communication when Jungkook’s voice breaks your concentration. “Do you like ramyeon?”

Your head snaps up to see him lean down under his desk to grab his backpack. He unzips it to retrieve two containers of instant noodles, and when he offers one to you, you give an approving nod. “I usually bring two in case I get extra hungry. I’ll make it, come meet me in the break room when you finish what you’re doing.”

You genuinely believe him on the first day, but when he just so happens to bring a second lunch on Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday, you start to get a little suspicious.

Friday has you stuck on a working session straight through your usual lunch hour, and Jungkook disappears without a word, returning as you’re pulling your headset off with two to-go salads in a plastic bag.

“I ordered one, and they gave me two. Crazy, right?”

You quirk an eyebrow at him to signal that you don’t believe a damn word, but you still thank him as you follow him down the hall to the break room.

“You’re coming out tonight, right?” He asks over lunch, and it takes you a second to remember the planned happy hour your boss has scheduled for the office. You’re torn between never wanting to see the inside of a bar again, and the overwhelming desire to drink as much as you can on the company’s dime. Ideally enough to obliterate the brain cells that store your memories of last weekend.

In the end, your cheapness wins out. Plus, given that it’s a social work event, you’d bet your entire salary that Yoongi will be nowhere to be found. You figure it might actually prove to be a good distraction. “Sure, yeah. At least for a couple drinks.”

“Cool,” Jungkook smiles a little as he spears a piece of chicken on his plastic fork. “Let me know when you’re done for the day, we can head over together.”

As much as you’d like to blow off early, a phone call that was supposed to take fifteen minutes ends up lasting over an hour. You mute your headset briefly to give a loud sigh, and shoot Jungkook a silent pout in apology when he meets your gaze, but he just flips his phone around to show you the progress he’s making on his island. At least he’s good at keeping himself entertained, you think with a smile.

Finally the person leading the call seems to come to the extremely delayed realization that no one is going to make any more progress on the issue after 5 PM on a Friday, and things wrap up pretty quickly after that. You and Jungkook gather your things and head for the front, and the office is a ghost town.

Your eyes drift down the opposite hallway towards the Genius Lab, your pulse quickening a little. You’ve checked the lab every evening this week and have luckily only found it empty, but you’re nearly an hour ahead of schedule today. And you don’t exactly have a great track record with Yoongi when it comes to Fridays.

“I should probably…”

“I can do it,” Jungkook cuts in softly. You’re hit with the automatic urge to say no, to shield him from this chaos in any way you can. But it would be really nice to not have to deal with Yoongi for one fucking day.

“I would appreciate that,” you reply, and Jungkook is already striding down the hall. You pretend to busy yourself on your phone as you hear a knock, then the electronic beeps of him punching the code into the door lock. When you glance up, you see him push the door open and stick his head inside, then promptly close it again.

“He’s gone. Let’s get out of here.”

The bar your boss has chosen is only a few blocks away from the office, and Jungkook holds the door open for you to enter first when you arrive. You don’t see your group right when you first walk in, and you have to round a bend in the layout of the building before you spot the long table of familiar faces.

You move to take a step forward, but Jungkook nearly imperceptibly brings a hand to your elbow to stop you. He says nothing, which is unlike him, and you start to ask a question.

“Wh—” the words die in your mouth when you see Yoongi smiling politely into a glass of whiskey, seated at the table next to your boss. His gaze flickers up to meet yours. Your stomach twists as you watch the smile immediately drop off his face. 

“We can go,” Jungkook says quickly, but you know you can’t give him the satisfaction.

“It’s fine,” you say, and it comes out a little more harsh than you mean it to. “We don’t have to sit near him.” Jungkook follows your lead to the opposite end of the table. When you take your seats, he almost immediately gets sucked into a conversation with some of the audio engineers. You do your best to at least act like you’re following along, but it feels like the room is spinning despite the fact that you’re entirely sober.

That absolutely needs to change, you quickly determine. You’re sitting at the corner of the table, so it’s easy enough to slip out and get to your feet. Jungkook glances up when you do.

“I’ll be right back,” you say, and your tone must be direct enough that he doesn’t ask any follow-up questions or offer his company. Which is fine, you think to yourself as you cross the room. You’re perfectly capable of walking to the bar and ordering a drink on your own.

At least it feels that way until you sweep your gaze across the room, waiting on a bartender to acknowledge your presence, and realize Yoongi is headed straight towards you, empty glass in hand.

Fuck fuck fuck.

You set your jaw, determined not to let him smell your fear, and renew your conviction to flag someone down and get a drink as fast as possible. When Yoongi takes a seat at the barstool next to you, you will your face not to react. But you’re not quite fast enough to remember to tell your mouth to stay shut, too.

“What are you doing here?” You snap, refusing to look him in the eye.

“I wanted to talk to you,” he says, voice even, and you blink hard. You don’t know what you were expecting, but it wasn’t that. “I figured an event with free alcohol was a good place to start. Let’s hope no one wore their good shoes tonight.”

Setting your jaw has turned into fully gritting your teeth, and you’ve never been more grateful to see a bartender when one approaches. You order quickly, and see Yoongi silently lift his empty glass as a request in your periphery.

“What do you want, Yoongi?”

When he hums and doesn’t respond right away, you glance over to see him running a finger around the rim of his finished drink. Just his fucking hand is enough to send a shiver up your spine, and you tear your gaze away.

“Well, for one, I honestly have to say I was surprised when HR didn’t personally escort me out of the building Monday morning.”

Your head snaps up to look at him again as you parse out his meaning. “Really?”

Yoongi’s gaze meets yours, his brows slightly pinching together as if he’s surprised that you’re surprised. “Uh, yeah.”

You’re so shocked it takes you a minute to form words. “I— I mean, it’s not like it was unprovoked.”

He makes a face as if he’s considering it, shrugging a little. “I suppose.”

As you drop your gaze to the wood grain of the bar, you can’t help but wonder if that was meant to be an apology. You barely have time to process that thought before the bartender returns, setting your drinks down, and you reach for yours like a woman dehydrated. When you take a sip, it’s strong— exactly what you need in this moment.

You’re already halfway off the barstool, very ready to get back to your seat at the table, when Yoongi speaks up again.

“Do you want to hear a funny story?” Something in his tone makes you pause, and he keeps going.

“I heard from an old friend a few days ago. We used to be really close, but lately I don’t think we’ve talked in…” He shakes his head in disbelief, like he’s trying to think. “God, probably years. I’ve been so focused on work. You know how I get.”

You physically recoil at his strange candor, how comfortable he suddenly is with implying that you know him. Your stomach is already starting to turn, though you can’t put a finger on why. It just feels like he’s playing with you.

Yoongi rolls his glass between his palms as he continues. “So you know, we catch up, ask how life is going, all the usual shit. And then my friend— Kihyun, that’s his name— Kih starts telling me about this crazy hookup he had last weekend.”

You nearly drop your drink as your blood runs cold. Yoongi continues the charade, pretending like he’s telling you something you don’t already know first-hand.

“He said he got approached by this super hot girl out of nowhere, and that she was fucking desperate for it. Barely said two words to him before she was asking him to take her home. And once he did, he said the sex was wild. I mean, it definitely sounded great to me when he gave me the play-by-play.” He pauses for a moment, and when he speaks again, there’s a new tone to his voice, almost aggressive. “Straight out of one of my own fantasies, really.”

You take a nervous gulp of your drink in hopes that it might help cool down your burning face— whether it’s from shame or rage, you can’t tell.

“And get this.” Yoongi’s voice is grave now, all pretense of telling a funny story gone as he turns to fully face you. “You’re never gonna believe whose name she cried out when she came. Because it sure wasn’t Kih’s.”

The shock of his words, at the fact that he knows this, is enough to freeze you where you stand. You’re nearly shaking with the chaotic storm of emotions swirling in your brain, and it takes every ounce of willpower you can muster to keep your voice steady as you fix him in your gaze. “I don’t see that it’s any of your business who or how I fuck, Yoongi.”

“Oh, I think it’s absolutely my business when you’re calling them my fucking name. And I don’t understand why you’d settle for imitation when you could have the real thing.” Despite how livid you are, you don’t miss the way your pussy flutters at the smug look on his face.

“Maybe it’s because your friend doesn’t come with all the strings attached that you do.”

“Strings?” He quirks an eyebrow. “I wasn’t planning on dating you, sweetheart.”

You can’t believe how dense he is, and you slam your drink down on the bar. “No, Yoongi, but you’re my fucking coworker. Have you ever heard the phrase, ‘don’t shit where you eat’?” He chuckles dryly into the rim of his glass. “It’s a bad fucking idea.”

He examines you as he takes a sip of whiskey, then finally speaks again. “Here’s the way I see it. We are both sane, consenting adults, very capable of being rational about this.” You scoff in disbelief at how calmly he can say such a thing as you take another long pull from your drink. “There’s obviously a lot of pent-up feelings going on. I’m not saying we have to be friends. Hell, we don’t even have to like each other. Sometimes it’s more fun when you don’t.”

Not expecting that commentary, you nearly choke on the ice in your glass. Yoongi gives you a moment to recover before continuing.

“It seems to me like we could establish something that would be mutually beneficial. Get some of that energy out. If anything, I think it might help both of us actually focus on our work, and that would in turn benefit everyone. It’d certainly be a lot better than the two of us running around like a couple of horny teenagers the way we have been lately. It’s not a purely selfish thing.”

You hate that his stupid logical argument makes sense to you. You hate it so much that you finish your drink in one swallow.

“Look, I’ll make it easy for you,” he says, eyes locked on you, his voice dropping into a lower register. The tone immediately takes you back to the last time you were in his lab. The things he said to you. The things he wanted to do to you. Heat pools in your belly before you can tell it not to.

“I’m going to head back to the group. You get yourself another drink, come join us, and take some time to think about it.”

He leans in to speak the next part directly into your ear, his voice quiet. Every nerve ending in your body lights up at the feeling of his breath against your neck. “Then I’m going to get up and go to the restroom. I’ll give you three minutes to discreetly excuse yourself and join me. If you don’t show, I’ll drop all of this and leave you alone. Promise.”

Yoongi pulls away, shooting you that trademark smirk, knowing full well that he doesn’t have to explain what will happen if you do decide to join him. He already has. Then he slips off the barstool, glass of whiskey in hand, and strides back towards the table.

When you order the next round, you ask for a double.

You do your best to act like the world isn’t ending as you return to your seat at the table. The conversation continues around you, without you; you can only stare dumbly at the empty space between two of your coworkers as you take a long swig of your drink. You’re vaguely aware of discussions of upcoming mixtapes and the Grammy’s, but your brain can’t process anything over the roaring in your ears, the pounding of your heartbeat in your gut— and a little lower.

You feel insane, enraged, and deliriously aroused.

You have no concept of how quickly time is passing, no clue if it’s been an instant or an hour when you see movement from the other end of the table out of the corner of your eye. There’s no self-control left in your system to keep your jaw from going slack, to keep you from unabashedly watching as Yoongi gets up from the table and strides confidently across the bar toward the restroom. He doesn’t so much as glance in your direction.

“Are you alright?”

You whip around at Jungkook’s voice, having completely forgotten there was anyone else in the room. It takes a second for you to snap your mouth shut, and then you realize you have to open it to answer his question.

“I— uh—” You can barely string a sentence together. “My drink is really strong.”

“Do you need some water?”

When you nod, he’s up in a flash, heading towards the bar, and you realize as you watch him disappear that it might have been a bad idea to let yourself be left alone. Because now you have no distraction from the way every cell in your body is screaming at you.

It’s obvious that there is a right choice and a wrong choice here. And you’ve tried so hard, for so long, to be smart. To deny the truth, to say no and go home, to channel the energy out in any other way. But none of it has worked. You still want this terrible man to do terrible things to you, maybe now more than ever. And you’re so fucking tired of making the right choice.

So tonight, you resolve with a final sip of your drink, you’ll make the wrong one. Fuck it.

You slip away from the table before Jungkook returns, following the same path Yoongi did towards the back of the bar. When you reach for the handle of the restroom door, your pulse is racing, enough that you nearly jump out of your skin when the door swings open before you can even touch it. You glance up to find yourself face-to-face with an equally shocked looking Yoongi.

“Your three minutes are up,” he says dryly. Rather than bother with a response, you bring your hand to his chest and firmly shove him back inside the single stall room. You hear him laugh a little as you follow after, pulling the knob and turning the lock into place behind you.

When he takes a step toward you, there’s nowhere for you to go except flush against the door. You watch his eyes drop down your body and back up, taking his time, shameless. His gaze lingers on your mouth.

“Didn’t think you’d really do it,” he murmurs, eyes glinting.

“Call it a lapse in judgment.”

There’s something about the situation that makes you feel like Yoongi has the upper hand— like he expects every part of this to go according to his plan. That, you decide, simply will not do. And then you drop to your knees in front of him.

“Oh my god,” Yoongi breathes, taking a small step back to give you room. “You’re a whore.”

You do your best to shoot a death glare up at him. “I don’t have to do this.”

He smirks. “I meant it as a compliment, honestly. Respectfully.”

That’s it. You’re determined to suck that smug fucking look off his face. “Hands to yourself,” you say firmly. “If you touch me, this all ends.”

Yoongi’s eyes widen, as if he wasn’t expecting you to be giving any orders. But then he nods, raising both hands in the air as if to indicate compliance. You lower your gaze and realize he’s already straining against the fabric of his joggers, which do nothing to hide how hard he is, the thin material clinging to every inch.

In one swift motion, you tug both his pants and boxers down his hips, and you have to actively suppress a soft sigh of appreciation. Yoongi’s ego doesn’t need any more feeding, but damn, his dick is even better up close: long, pale, and pretty.

Glancing back up at him, you maintain eye contact as you lean forward to teasingly trace your tongue along one of the prominent veins that runs the length of his shaft. His eyes are dark with lust as he watches you. Despite being on your knees, a thrill of sheer power runs through you when you see him swallow hard, his Adam’s apple jerking in his throat.

It occurs to you that you are extremely ready to torture this man.

When you reach the tip, you just barely slide your lips over it in an open-mouthed kiss to the head of his cock, your tongue swirling in sloppy circles. You can hear Yoongi breathing now, clearly trying and failing to suppress his shaky exhales at your work.

Tilting your head to find the right angle, you take more of him into your mouth, then bring a hand to his shaft to guide the head of his dick to one side. You don’t miss the quiet groan you elicit from him as you let him press against the soft wall of your cheek to create a bulge. He makes the same sound again, louder, when you rub your tongue firmly along the underside of his shaft while you do it.

His hips jerk under your touch as you start to move the hand wrapped around him in slow, deliberate strokes. You recenter him in your mouth and bob your head along his length in time, now sucking firmly. Yoongi’s breath catches on a moan as you keep your tongue pressed tight to his shaft and match the movement of your head to the deliciously slow pace of your hand.

The sound only encourages you, and you lean forward to take even more of him until his cock briefly brushes against the back of your throat. You hold him there for a second, then swallow.

“Fuck,” Yoongi hisses. You can feel him twitch a little in your mouth, taste it as he leaks precum onto your tongue. You tip back for a few more shallow thrusts, just tormenting him, then repeat the action, humming this time as he hits your throat. His knees nearly buckle.

You glance up at Yoongi as you pull back again, lashes fluttering, and you have to keep yourself from laughing around his cock at the look of pure distress on his face. Now that you’re watching him, you realize his hands are flexing desperately at his sides— it’s clearly taking everything in his power to follow your no touching policy.

Good, you think, and then you lean forward to swallow him down and keep him there, taking as much as you can until your nose is nearly flush with his pelvis. You bob your head, guiding him up and down your throat, choking slightly but too determined to stop even as your eyes start to water.

“Oh my god,” you hear him groan, and your eyebrows raise at the sound of a loud smack. When you look up, still working him in your throat, you realize that he’s helplessly banged a fist on the bathroom door and is now bracing himself against it. You watch as he rakes his other hand through his hair, his head tipping back with a gasp as you increase your pace in response. His hips shudder as he starts to buck softly into your mouth. “Y-yeah, keep doing that, oh fuck, fuck—”

At what feels like the last possible second, you pull off his cock with a soft, wet pop, swallowing down the precum in your mouth. You wipe at the corners of your lips before getting to your feet, legs shaking a little more than you’d like from how long you’ve been on your knees. As you meet his gaze, now at eye-level, it seems you’ve certainly achieved your mission: Yoongi’s usual smug appearance has been replaced with a look of frustrated desperation, courtesy of one denied orgasm.

“Why should I let you get off that easy?” You ask simply, and he makes a noise low in his throat, something between a groan and a laugh.

“Fuck, you are such a bitch.” He advances towards you, and you find yourself backing up, this time until your ass is pressed against the countertop of the bathroom sink. He’s staring at your mouth again, looking at it with what seems to be a little more reverence now that he knows what it’s capable of.

“Am I allowed to touch you yet?” His voice is so low, his mouth so close to yours, that it makes your core ache. The noises you sucked out of him have unfortunately only turned you on even more. “Or are you going to make me beg?”

As much as you’d love to see that, the desperate throb that’s been steadily building between your legs has now overtaken your desire to tease. “Yes, Yoongi, you can touch me.”

The words have barely left your mouth and his hands are already on your hips, firmly spinning you around. You have to clutch the edge of the countertop just to stay upright, but you only feel yourself getting that much wetter at the rough way he handles you. You shiver as he shoves the hem of your dress up to expose your ass, and you can’t help yourself, leaning forward to give him the best possible angle, too desperate for anything less.

“Fuck,” Yoongi breathes, and you’d swear he almost sounds appreciative.

You don’t even have time to process that thought before his hand cracks down over your ass, so hard that it nearly knocks all the breath out of your lungs. You inhale a shaky gasp, your mind reeling in its attempt to catch up, but Yoongi is already pulling your panties to the side, perfect fingers sliding between your folds. There’s no hiding how drenched you are; your upper thighs are starting to stick together with arousal.

Without warning, he presses two fingers firmly into you, and it’s enough to make your jaw go slack. You outright moan when they find purchase against your g-spot, rubbing in tight, expert circles. He could make you come right now if he wanted to.

“You’re so wet for me,” Yoongi’s voice is low and smug, and you don’t need to see his expression to know that cocky smirk has returned to his face. “Been ready for it all night, huh?” You whimper a noise that isn’t disagreement.

“Good,” he says firmly, pairing the word with another smack to your ass. You’re too far gone to try and hold it back now, not with the way his fingers are working inside you, and you moan again. “Because we can’t take too long,” Yoongi continues. “Don’t want anyone getting suspicious. Which is really a damn shame, because there’s so much I want to do to you.”

When he smacks your ass one more time, even harder, and couples it with an insistent press of his fingers against your front wall, you have to grip the edge of the sink for dear life. Your cunt squeezes around him; the noise you make is practically a sob.

He huffs a laugh as he withdraws his fingers, and you glance up to see him retrieving a condom from his pocket and tearing it open. “Wrecked already? And I haven’t even fucked you yet.”

You try to compose yourself, but just watching the way his hands work as he rolls the condom over his leaking cock has you aching, clenching around nothing. You really are fucking wrecked— nothing has ever come close to this.

Yoongi’s hands come to your hips, pads of his fingers digging into your skin, and you feel the head of his cock against your entrance, sliding lazily through your folds but purposefully not pressing into you.

“Yoongi,” you whine. You’re too far gone for this teasing.

“You have to tell me what you want,” he says, his voice dark.

You can barely even think a sentence, and you try to push back on him instead, but he keeps you held firmly in place, hands squeezing into the flesh of your hips. “Tell me,” he insists.

“I want you to fuck me,” you manage, and you look up to meet his gaze in the bathroom mirror.

He licks his lips, and you realize that he’s having just as hard a time restraining himself. “That much is obvious,” he says, and you can hear the unsteadiness in his voice now. “How would you like to get fucked?”

You’ve had enough alcohol to brazenly tell the truth. “Like you hate me.”

It may be the first genuine smile of his you’ve ever seen.

“Gladly,” he replies, and then he thrusts all of himself into you at once. You collapse forward on the countertop, crying out at the feeling.

“Yeah,” Yoongi grunts, a little breathless. “You like that?” He pulls nearly all the way out and slams into you one more time, pressing his hips flush with your ass until you feel overwhelmingly full. Then he starts to properly thrust, moving at a pace that can only be described as ruthless.

“Oh, fuck,” you gasp, your head dropping down as you scramble to brace yourself against the counter. You practically yelp when his hand cracks over your ass again.

He leans forward; you can feel his chest graze over your back, his hips still snapping into you as he grabs your jaw with one hand and forces your gaze up to look at him in the mirror again. You watch as he runs two fingers along your bottom lip in an unasked question. You let your jaw go slack to allow him to slip into your mouth.

When your lips close around his fingers, you find yourself a little grateful to have something to keep you grounded to reality. Your eyes flit up to Yoongi’s face, and his gaze is piercing, eyes totally fixed on you.

“You look so good like this.” His voice is hoarse, strained from effort, and he continues to drive into you, never slowing. Your own hip bones dig into the bathroom counter, shocks of pleasure-pain rippling through you with each thrust. Little moans and whimpers spill out from your mouth around his fingers at the sensation, and you can feel your climax starting to build.

Yoongi withdraws from your mouth, that same hand moving down your body to slip into your panties and circle your clit, earning a gasp from you. His other hand keeps a death grip on your hip as he thrusts, and he straightens up again, the head of his cock now rubbing so perfectly over your g-spot that you hiss.

“Did Kihyun fuck you like this?”

The question catches you off-guard. “N-no,” you gasp, and the hot coil of your arousal tightens in your core. Yoongi’s cock stroking into you, his hand working your clit, the feeling is overwhelming, dizzying. “Oh, god.” Your head presses into your forearm as you give yourself over to the pleasure. You can only distantly hear Yoongi’s voice continue, somewhere between coaxing and demanding.

“I didn’t fucking think so. So why don’t you say it? Tell me who fucks you right. Tell me who you fucking hate.”

The fingers on your clit are unrelenting now, and your edge approaches fast and hard.

“Y-Yoongi,” you breathe, and it feels too good to say his name and mean it. “Yoongi, fuck, Yoongi.” A loud moan rips through you as your legs start to shake. “Oh fuck,” you gasp, “I’m coming, fuck, yes—” You nearly sob as your climax hits you hard, and your walls flutter around Yoongi’s cock over and over in what feels like an endless orgasm.

The pleasure rolls through you, and you look up in the mirror to see Yoongi grit his teeth as he picks up the pace of his hips. A look of desperation paints his face, not unlike the way he looked when you were blowing him, and you know he must be close.

“God fucking damnit,” he grunts, each word punctuated with a thrust, and then he tips his head back and pushes all the way into you with a moan as he comes.

For a moment he pauses like that, gazing up at the ceiling, chest heaving with effort as his dick twitches inside of you. “Holy shit,” he breathes, and then he starts to laugh softly in what appears to be disbelief. “Fuuuuck.”

You haven’t fully recovered, so you can only watch, still gripping the countertop for dear life, as he slips the condom off, chucks it into the trash can, and pulls his boxers and pants up. He gives his reflection a once-over in the mirror, running a hand through his hair, and you’re amazed at how quickly he’s put himself back together. The only indication that he was literally just railing you is the way he’s breathing heavily.

Yoongi notices you watching him and gives your ass one more firm slap, hard enough that you flinch a little.

“Wait a minute or two before you head out,” he instructs, and you nod dumbly. He crosses the room, opens the door, and slips out, all before you can even so much as think a coherent thought.

It takes several more minutes for you to get your shit together, but you eventually manage to readjust your underwear and smooth your dress down, though your legs are certainly still unsteady when you make your way back to the table. You can’t help but shoot a glance over at Yoongi as you pass, and you’re shocked to see him laughing and chatting it up with the group of coworkers seated around him. You see clear expressions of surprise on their faces, too— because he’s never like this. Except, apparently, mere minutes after fucking you.

You don’t even bother to sit down, instead grabbing your purse off the table and slinging the straps over your shoulder.

“Wow, there you are,” Jungkook’s voice drags you out of your thoughts, and the look of concern on his face just makes your stomach turn. You genuinely have no idea how long you were gone for. “Are you okay? Your face looks flushed.”

You don’t know how to answer his question, so you don't. “I think I’m gonna go home.”

“Do you need a ride?”

You shake your head quickly. “I’ll call a friend.”

Perched on the curb outside, you clutch your phone for dear life as you pull up Jimin’s contact to call him. The line rings and you realize you’re shivering; you don’t think it has anything to do with the weather.

You don’t even give him a chance to say hello when the call connects. “Can you come get me?”

He groans on the other end of the line. “Why? I already took my pants off for the night.”

“Baby mochi, please.” You whine, but you know only the full explanation will get him out of bed. You drop your voice a little. “I just hatefucked Suga in the bathroom at the company happy hour. I need you to come pick me up immediately.”

Jimin’s apartment is a ten minute drive away, but you swear he makes it in five.

“Well, well, well,” Your best friend’s voice is smug as you slide into his passenger seat. “If it isn’t the company whore.”

“Shut the fuck up, Jimin.”

~*~

Come Monday morning, you’re racing down the hallway to the conference room, quietly cursing yourself for being late. You’d seen the email from your boss moving the usual Tuesday pull-up to first-thing Monday, but then you’d gotten so tied up with other projects you’d forgotten about it entirely. It was only once you were in the break room, trying to get your caffeine fix in, that you’d glanced up at the wall clock and realized it was already ten after.

Focused as you are on getting to the meeting quickly— and just as importantly, not spilling any of your coffee— you’re completely unaware of your surroundings until it’s too late. You nearly smack directly into Yoongi as you approach the conference room simultaneously.

He smirks as you jump back in surprise. “We have got to stop meeting like this.”

It’s the first time you’ve seen him since Friday; you’ve been hiding out in Baby Star Candy’s corner all morning. “We’re late,” you say, flustered enough to state the obvious, and he shrugs like he can’t disagree.

“I got distracted.”

Yoongi must notice the way your eyes start to widen. “With work,” he clarifies quickly. He reaches around you to place a hand on the conference room door, and you hear his voice low in your ear. “Amazing how much easier it is to focus today, huh?”

Straightening up to put some space between you, he pushes the door open and gestures for you to go first. You swallow hard and try to keep your composure as you enter the room, briefly apologizing for being late. Yoongi follows behind you silently, slumping into the open seat across the table. You take a sip of your coffee to settle your nerves, which turns out to be a horrible idea when your boss speaks.

“There they are, perfect timing. You’re the very two people my next announcement concerns.”

You just barely manage to keep your drink in your mouth. When your gaze flits to Yoongi across from you, he looks similarly shell-shocked. You can’t help but wonder if you’re about to get fired in front of the entire team.

“We’ve managed to secure funding for the Grammy’s at the end of the month,” your boss says brightly. “We’ll be flying Suga out to do a press circuit as well as attend the award show and surrounding events in-person. We think it will be a great opportunity to network with American artists, try to get his name out there and work on our international appeal.”

“And of course,” your boss’ gaze lands on you, “we all know that our Suga isn’t the most extroverted, or good with schedules, for that matter. We figured he needs a wrangler, and who better than our very own admin?”

You swear your heart stops beating. Your boss keeps going, reminding the team to connect with you about temporarily taking back any deliverables you’ve been handling while you’ll be out of pocket for Grammy’s weekend and subsequent travel time, but you barely process a word. This can’t be happening.

An entire weekend of forced professionalism, in Los Angeles, with the man you just hatefucked in a bathroom. What could possibly go wrong?

chapter four | masterlist | chapter six

[nateriverswife]

Do you like Lawmane?

Nope. I seriously ship him with only one person in the canon (Aizawa), because I have a different idea of how his relationship should be and none of the “popular” characters can give him that.

The way I see it:

I want him to be fundamentally affected by a pure connection that leaves him devastated for the rest of his life. That’s what I think he deserves. I don’t think he would fall for someone just because they challenge him intellectually. I don’t believe that, and that’s another reason why I don’t ship Lawlight. but this is not what the ask is about.

imo, he needs to find someone that can reach that part inside of him that he constantly hides it away from the world, from other people, for his own sake, and take that, and bring it out, and put it on the table in front of both of them, cherish it, make sure it grows and it’s healthy, so that he can truly love them. And then I want that person to grab a knife out of thin air, and start chopping it, and destroying it, and making a complete mess, and L simply can’t understand what’s going on, but he trusts that person so much and there must be reason for it, so he just accepts it, and they are smiling, so that means everything will be alright, but it's not true, because, as soon as they are done, they just leave. leave him alone with that mess. That’s how his ships should be, and there’s no one in the canon manga that can even come close to fulfil this desire of mine to see him in this condition. him ignoring all the red flags going on that keep telling him to run away, because he’s finally happy, he believes they will never hurt him, but they do, and leave him scarred forever. And that’s beautiful to me.

Aizawa is close to this but not quite, because L dies so like, he can’t do that to him and I don’t think he has a reason to do it. He just fulfils the healthy relationship part that I want L to experience.

For these reasons, Misa is not a suitable partner, not even in the slightest. My dislike for this ship is not as strong as the one I have for Lawlight, because Lawlight shippers just pretend they are canon, and I cannot deal with this anymore. Yeah, you can read L and Light from that perspective, but don’t pretend is the holy grail we should all drink from. Lawmane shipper don’t shove it down my throat from left, right, up and down, from the back and front, so they are pretty chill. I don’t really understand the reasons for shipping them, to be honest. I didn’t see any kind of chemistry. I sometimes even forget they interacted more than when L locked her up, so lmao

I know I focused a lot on L and not on Misa in this post, but, at this point, it should be clear that I don’t care that much about her. I dislike her character. Being “hot” doesn’t make up for all the reason I hate her, so. I think, in an unserious way, that she should just date Light so they can ruin each other and leave us the fuck alone. But, in a serious way, she needs to go to therapy. I think if her trauma was dealt with professionally, she would not be at Light’s feet (but Rem’s lmao jk), but you know. In an EXTREMLY serious way, she should team up with Takada and destroy Light, but oh well.

[jasonsmirrorball]

ok ok dad jason and his diary about his baby growing up…

he ends up treating it like a real diary and writes some pretty honest and intense things in there. talking about how he used this as a bridge to make up with dick, how no matter how scared he was that this was the first time he’s had hope in such a long time. that some nights he would let his fear of failure and being a parent get the best of him, and shed tears while whispering “i’m so sorry you’re mine” to the baby. that sometimes he feels SO helpless as he watches mom struggle to breastfeed and sob because she feels like she’s failing, too.

but these entries are sandwiched between moments where he writes about how baby smiled for the first time, and jason swears he never felt love like that before. that baby rolled over for the first time, lifted their head up on their own, learned how to clap and thinks sneezes are the funniest. that he watches mom lay on the floor and play with baby and finally feels complete.

he stops writing in the journal as consistently as the baby begins to toddle. he’ll write entries as he remembers, saying how much he misses baby while they’re at preschool/daycare. that they came home with sloppy hand turkey art for thanksgiving and he swears he’s never seen anything greater. but he starts to go months, years without writing. it eventually ends up forever untouched when baby reaches age 7, and shoved into a closet somewhere.

when the kid is a teenager, and deep in their teen angst where they hate everyone/everything, they have a chore to help sort out the hall closet. they find the journal and start reading through it, and never realized how much their father went through. i don’t think jason will ever be able to fully articulate feelings, and he never planned on telling their kid just how difficult his life was before, and especially not during those first few years of baby’s life and was still learning that he deserved a life like this.

jason comes home and finds them on the floor, poring through the worn journal. he stops in his tracks because he never really planned on giving the journal to his kid, and he honestly forgot about it. they have this heart to heart on the floor, talking through the tensions that had been building up between them in the past few months. a lot of teenage angst “well i’m sorry i ruined your life!” or “i bet you just wish i was never born!” sort of things, lots of twisting words and miscommunication. i’m team girl dad!jason, so for me it’s him and his 15 year old daughter talking, sitting against the wall, with her head on his shoulder. it’s the first time he is really transparent and open with her emotionally, talking about how having her truly changed his life, but it was never for the worse.

anyway it strengthens their relationship and she is unabashedly a daddy’s girl again, and life in the house feels a lot smoother. mom finds them sleepy against the wall after a long talk and lots of tears.

sorry this is so long LOL i spent my lunch doing this. maybe one day id turn it into a real fic who knows. anyway love u ro 💖

i love u ro thank u for sending this in i don't think i can add anything to this except to say that this version of dad jason is unfortunately so very me and my father except we did NOT talk about it lmao (i do love my baba very much though)

this breaks my heart in the best way i'm going to be thinking about this for a really long time

[hoeforinarizaki]

A SONG FOR THEM.

Type: Headcannons + Scenario

Inarizaki x Fem!Singer!Reader (Whole Team)

Summary: You're a singer, and from a popular girl band. Sometimes, you just don't know how to express gratitude for your friends and so instead, write a song dedicated to them.

No Warnings! But Just Cursing From Me.

Inarizaki:

Feral bitches alert, get your tasers ready.

Jk– anyways, basically at first they didn't know you were a singer because you never really openly sang to anyone.

...Or did so in general because you want to surprise your team. You've had a pretty hard time expressing your own emotions through words, like some other people.

And boom! One day came the thought of like...

"Why don't i just write some lyrics and make a song dedicated to them?" No shit sherlock could've done that like two weeks ago smh– 😒

ANYWAYS...so it took lots of time but you managed to get help from your bandmates to finish doing the song.

Ugh they're such good friends mine could never

And by 'it took lots of time' i mean in a week. I'm an impatient hoe leave me be *sobs* ��

First of all, before the day of the surprise performance you texted Kita the night before and told him and the team to get to the gym early because of an "announcement".

He was confused on why you didn't just tell the GC but we just want to see them honestly /j

The moment morning came, you and your material gworls bandmates set up your shit and all that before the boys had arrived first.

Congrats, you made it just in time before Kita came.

Manz is NEVER LATE. Periodt 👏

He was looking at the music equipment like "who tf is gon' use all of this during volleyball practice"–

Boi not everything in gym is centered about you and your musty crusty team 🤡 jk i love you guys most. If you don't believe me look at my username.

The moment the rest finally arrived, the cue had started. Definitely not Suna immediately taking his phone out–

Nah actually he gon' take a video. You better prepare.

So now let's talk about their reactions...Kita may actually be the most emotional one to me for some reason. People say he's not much of a person for expression but..

HE LOVES YOU SO IT'S OKAY BABES 😍 okay lol i'll stop so let me just say it. You know that scene in S4 where Kita cries after getting his team jersey? Yep.

He looked like that. His eyes were ready to make waterfalls. But how you ask?

Ah, here we go. Of course you make meaningful lyrics.

And Kita was very touched by them. And because of that, manz was the first to realize the song was for them.

He's like, "You made this for us...? Oh. I'd have never thought you think of us that way" while close to tears I'M SUCH A DAMN SIMP UGH 😫

Aran's totally just looking at the scene while "👁👄👁" is just written all over his face lmao like rlly? You??

He's just gonna be shocked when you hit the high notes.

You're perfection to me shawty, whoever says otherwise shall face the wrath of the daddy captains– and no fr stop saying you aren't you're more than enough <3

So back to the boys, Suna's definitely just recording. Yep, i really can't leave that out.

Though you can actually see a small smile forming from his mouth because damn you so pretty up there 💞

Onto Atsumu and Osamu...oh boy.

If you don't like being cat called or disturbed in the middle of performances, you're gonna hate them /j

"LOOKING HOT BBY!" "FUCK OFF TSUMU CAN'T YOU SEE YOU'RE RUINING THE MOOD–"

Ah yes, the daily life of the Miya Twins ft. (Y/N) 💀

Omimi and Akagi just looking there, awestruck and love filled in their eyes damn i love them shdisishsjksks

Anyways, so the moment you finally get off stage, you are gonna be swarmed with men. Congrats, they're already part of your harem but you made them simp even more ✨️

Compliments coming from the twins, Kita looking at you thinking of a hundred ways to ask you of marriage–

It's getting too obvious i like him isn't it...it's true tho, he prob would be thinking of that lol.

Anyways, i hope you enjoy your fox boy harem 🦊💘

BONUS: Because the were mesmerized as hell by your band's performance they're thinking of recruiting your bandmates for their team theme song during matches.

Haha yeah, good luck dealing with that, main vocalist.

Scenario Time!

(Please listen to the song if you want! And read the english lyrics after if you want to know how emotional it is *wink*)

"I LOVE YOU!"

"Tsumu, i swear if you don't shut the fuck up.."

The sounds of booming music was heard from the gym, the calming sound of the bass along with the melodious sound of the keyboard right in tow. You were right inside– singing and conveying your feelings to the audience you had gathered.

'Even if my heart froze over, you would always be there to embrace me and tell me, "it will be okay".'

From behind his phone's screen, Suna sticks his tongue out at the twins fighting. "Hear that? I always comfort (Y/N) when she's lonely more than you two." This ticks them off. Atsumu glares right at the pussy hair boy, seemingly jealous.

"Shush, Suna!"

This keeps going on and on until the moment Kita finally tells them to stop. He just wants to hear your beautiful voice and nobody else's. Just– let him have a moment.

'And believe the world will change, it's so filled with kindness. So much that tomorrow will be dazzling, too.'

Aran had nearly begun sobbing. "What a good hearted girl." He quietly praises while watching you stand right up in front of the stage, with the biggest smile on your face as you sang.

"Can she be mine?" Akagi deadpans, stars almost coming out of his eyes. I'm afraid to tell you that you gotta get in line, (Y/N)'s already got these other boys–

...

It was done, the sounds of the instruments began to fade and you look to your team, soft expression never fading once. It was that time on that they had known you would never leave them, because with those lyrics alone, you definitely chose to stay.

Clapping. You wanted to hear that most. Because you tried hard to confess– maybe a bit too hard just thinking about the song, but it was worthwhile to see some of the boys's rare smiles.

Ah yes...both sides agree it was a real blessing to have you on their team. No take backs.

The song may have been short, but the time you'll be spending together with them will live on forever. They don't need the memories, but sometimes, exceptions can also matter.

[frogsnbunnies0914]

Help you have fun on your trip! Hope the anxiety doesn’t ruin the mood tho cuz I understand being anxious about everything(༎ຶ௰༎ຶ )

Here’s a random thought I had about Nanamin (ง ˃ ³ ˂)ว ⁼³₌₃⁼³

Sleeping in late with him on his days off and then just laying in bed for hours talking and cuddling before finally getting up and dressed for a casual date at the café then walking through a super pretty park while holding hands or linking arms. He spoils you at the café buying you every sweet pastry your eyes lingered a little too long on. Cute little casual dates at a café and park is all I crave in life lmao. And what better than with sexy; ex-salary; capitalist hating; goofy; bread loving; Nanamin ♡｡ › ·̮ ‹ ｡

thank you sm!! (Hopefully it'll get better once I get to my destination 😭)

And oh my g o o d n e s s 💕💕 that sounds adorable!! When y'all first wake up and start talking and his voice is scratchy from sleep ❤️❤️ very much "good morning, sweetheart, how was your sleep?" as he pulls you closer so you can snuggle into his chest

when he convinces you to get up for the café and park!! he's absolutely a morning person and although y'all "slept in" a bit, he is super awake and ready for anything when y'all go out. As you said, he'd get anything you even slightly paid more attention to <3<3 I love sweet things (and bread) so like,,,I would be so excited to share something from the café with him.

I feel like he would love stopping in little bookshops and such as well bc he hates big corporations and wants to support local businesses! By the end of the day, you'd have all sorts of little nicknacks to remember today and he would be happy to see a smile on your face. The end of the night would definitely be just as snuggly and warm and sleepy as the beginning of the day, but instead of waking up in his arms you would be falling asleep in them <3<3

Thank you again for sending this!!! I loved thinking about this idea and I'm just fhhfjdjd I love him so much, he's so sweet 😭💕 I hope you're having a good day/night and thank you for the ask!!!

(@kagejima tagging bc I thought you might enjoy soft kento)

[jinkicake]

Yeah the aether brainrot is real😭 guess you have to create the change you want to see in the world😔😔 like he’s such a boy and idk what other way to describe him, truly the Giovanna effect. He’s really the “am i going too fast for you?🥺 want me to slow down” while he’s folding you in half; he’s so pretty and he knows it!! He has that smile that’s so warm and trustworthy the “he would never hurt anyone” smile and it’s the exact same one he will use when he’s overstimulating you until your eyes are permanently at the back of your head. Very much “I won’t reveal my true secrets or intentions until necessary” vibes. And he’s the beloved traveler! Why would they think he’s knuckles deep in you at a dinner with ningguang?? Why would anyone have reason to suspect he’s at the top of wangshu inn covering your mouth so they don’t hear your screams?(Xiao knows and definitely sees and that’s probably why he does it) like he has a pinch of “and what about it🤨” bc he would probably bend you over a statue of the seven and not flinch bc what are they really gunna do😭 eating you out in the hands of barbatos when it’s pitch black outside and the only one who would be around is that bard; knowing zhongli on the clock and having you ride him as he sits on the statue and they can hear it all. Lmao everyone knows your a slut but you like he does this but not a soul will say anything to you but they know you’re the travelers play thing. Wonder why the electro archon and the shrine maiden can’t look you in the eyes for more than a second 🤔 will tell you you’re imagining things.will give a demonstration if asked tho he has an exhibitionist streak. “I don’t do anything unless you ask me” bitch 😒 I hate him!! I hear everyone’s “his hair is down during sex” and I raise you: what if he keeps it in a braid or in a bun. Like if he’s fighting and his king ass hair isn’t getting caught in anything he’s not gunna take it down when you can still pull on it. Would also look suspicious if you came back form a commission limping and he didn’t look put together. Ik Lisa knows and by w jean and Kaeya too so they’re like 😳🫢 the entire time they talk to y’all. Jean is stuttering her way through asking him to check out some nearby ruins and you’re asking her if she’s feeling okay😭 Kaeya is holding back a laugh but if you look at him he will evaporate, like they can’t say they heated you creaming on his dick in the forbidden section of the library😔😔 so they just gotta pretend like everything is normal while sunshine boy is smiling like he’s never done anything wrong a day in his life😊 his song gotta be Handstand specifically the dojacat verse👀👀 abyss aether definitely likes a crowd you can’t tell me he wouldn’t give direct orders while you’re falling apart in his lap💀he don’t care who walks in. What if he were in the same universe as tracer aether like a clone Albedo👀 let me not think about that too much😭 he’s a menace and loves to asset dominance any way possible, him using everyone’s visions to beat her showed me that he isn’t letting his full potential being sealed away stop that!!

no aether is so sick... he pretends to be concerned about you but then continues to do the thing that's causing your brain to melt!

like 'I'll stop, don't worry' when you're crying from overstimulation but then he's continuing to play with your clit until your legs spasm and you start to sob

yeah i get the aether appeal bc he seems so sweet and that is how he gets you! yandere!aether is real!!! he makes you think he is a normal dude but then the next morning you're tied up to his throne and he's like 'good morning!'

now personally if aether had me on top of the inn and xiao was only listening in... i would personally jump off the building bc xiao has to join in like ill cry... like GET OVER HERE THERE IS ENOUGH ROOM... matter of fact, i might push aether off the roof for xiao like he'll survive it's fine! sorry xiao got the better of me- now its just me and xiao hehehe but still two is better than one so i want both!

wait a min i know youre thinking of traveler aether and im thinking of abyss prince aether.... but i need to jot down that idea of him fucking you against the statues bc that goes perfect w the yandere!abyss prince i got going in my head right now.... that will be my dream for tonight and what i fall asleep to!

i think he keeps his hair up during... ya know.... like it's too long and would be suuuch a mess to keep down... it would just get in the way!

naurrrr aether is so sick if he acts like nothing happened while you're limping and bruised up like everyone would believe him if he said nothing was wrong omggggggg

sighhh thinking abt the abyss prince just wow-

[stormyoceans]

[VICE VERSA episode 8 parts 3&4]

Tess is such a bitch lmao

So… this is awkward

“Mek looks like someone I liked” the casual queer-friendlyness in this show makes me want to cry

Also side note: I really appreciate that Puen doesn’t get legit jealous learning this because that trope is utter garbage for how possessive and unreasonable it makes a character look

“How DARE you not like me back then when we didn’t even know each other” yeah no fuck off

Appreciate that Puen’s being honest about Mek’s intentions right away rather than keeping it a secret for some flimsy reason

“Let’s try to trust him” seems like a risky call given how big his hate-boner for Tess is

“Do you have a problem?” “yes, I could be riding Puen right now instead of having to look at your damn face”

ALESSANDRO MAHMOUD?????

Don’t fucking touch him

“Our characters don’t click” that’s because one of you is a nice person and sadly it’s the fictional one

He’s wearing his “just quit” shirt again, following your own advice my guy

Omg Talay fucking insulted Mek asjkdlfj

I know I’d probably be on Mek’s side if Tess was still himself and the show’s giving us a very biased pov since we’ve all grown to like Talay /and/ I’m all for revenge after being wronged but yeah I can’t help it, this guy’s a dick

CATS!!!!!!!!!!

The orange one looks so confused, the poor thing

“Are you a cat lover?” ANSWER THE QUESTION

Cakes all over this episode for some reason

TAWAN????? *raging war flashbacks*

I’m sorry but all I’m looking at is the cats

The grey one must feel really comfortable since it’s letting Jimmy hold it like a baby! The way Sea’s holding his is plain wrong though…

This poor guy must be like “what is wrong with this lady”

“If it’s not this cat, I won’t be director” how petty is this bitch

TESS HAS NOT ONLY ONE BUT /TWO/ PEOPLE INEXPLICABLY LIKING HIM????

“I’m going back to liking him” Puen to himself: “brb gotta check if there’s enough budget left to hire an assassin”

T&P: let me have a tasty 0% drink as I think it over

“My mood is just cloudy grey” ROLLLL CREDI–

I see you smiling after Puen touched your belly Talay

But also what is this whole scene

I mean, mirroring each other would be the perfect excuse to kiss…….

Oh? OH????

GO FUCK YOURSELF TALAY

Mek went back to liking him real fast, holy shit

“GREYLLERY”??? THAT’S NOT EVEN A PUN

Puen being jealous here is completely different from what I mentioned earlier, here I actually get it even if jealousy is never a good thing

Puen literally RUNNING to join Talay alkdskld

It makes me sad how sad Puen looks

DON’T LEAVE!!

Puen listening to the perfect sad music to fuel his broken heart

Talay, c’mon, can you really not figure out what’s bothering him?

Grabbing his cheeks omg

“I haven’t even seen your face, yet I like you” MY HEART!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I was worried Talay was gonna blow it after Puen showed so much vulnerability but THIS IS GREAT, I’M SO HAPPY

FINALLY!!!!!!

Take that, Mek, you little bitch

Also is this the right time to bring up that they are using other people’s bodies to make out……..

Tess is such a bitch lmao <<<<< HE'S REALLY ALWAYS BEEN THE BIGGEST ASSHOLE JUST DITCHING HIS FRIENDS AND BRAGGING ABOUT STEALING OTHER PEOPLE'S CRUSHES AND THEN HE GOES AND COMPLETELY RUINS TALAY'S LIFE AND /STILL/ IS A TOTAL JERKFACE TO TUN IM SORRY BUT THIS IS A TESS HATE ZONE

“Mek looks like someone I liked” the casual queer-friendlyness in this show makes me want to cry <<<<< IT REALLY IS SO NICE i know we've already talked about it in a previous episode but i will never get tired of saying how much i love this. talay says he liked a man before and it's something that can just BE. kita and fuse pretty much know that he likes puen even if he hasn't actually admitted it and they never question it. puen and talay don't have to come out to up and aou because they act lovey dovey once and up and aou just take it in stride and go right into teasing them. and i said it before, but this isn't only a thing in the alternate universe, where same sex marriage is legal, queerness in vice versa just is and it's beautiful

Also side note: I really appreciate that Puen doesn’t get legit jealous learning this because that trope is utter garbage for how possessive and unreasonable it makes a character look // “How DARE you not like me back then when we didn’t even know each other” yeah no fuck off <<<<< REASON NUMBER 9264828648 WHY I LOVE VICE VERSA!!!!!!! other love interests in BLs: you liked someone else? you liked someone else before meeting me? jail for almost-boyfriend! jail for almost-boyfriend for one thousand years!!!!! puen the walking green flag: [uses that as an excuse to hold talay's hand and give him a cheek kiss] LIKE IDK WHAT ELSE TO SAY HE IS SIMPLY BUILT DIFFERENT

Appreciate that Puen’s being honest about Mek’s intentions right away rather than keeping it a secret for some flimsy reason <<<<< after what happened in episode 4 puen has been trying so hard to be honest and upfront with talay (except for his name, which is way more about puen's own sense of self rather than any actual malicious intent of hiding stuff from talay), and even when talay tries to deal with everything by himself (like with tess' clothes) he's always the one to remind him that he's not alone and that they're a team and that they can find a solution together!!!! they do have some misunderstandings throughout the show but they never last longer than an episode because they're just SO GOOD AT BEING OPEN AND COMMUNICATING

“Let’s try to trust him” seems like a risky call given how big his hate-boner for Tess is <<<<< puen was trusting the talay effect to work its magic and the talay effect is gonna come through!!!!!!

“Do you have a problem?” “yes, I could be riding Puen right now instead of having to look at your damn face” <<<<< THE WAY I CHOKED ON MY OWN SALIVA THE FIRST TIME I READ THIS COMMENT AND SPENT THE FOLLOWING 10 MINUTES COUGHING MY LUNGS OUT TRYING TO RECOVER SFJKSGFKSGDKSG funny you would mention that though because one of my favorite headcanons is that talay indeed likes to rid-- [GUNSHOT]

ALESSANDRO MAHMOUD????? <<<<< THE DOUBLE TAKE I DO EVERY SINGLE TIME JUST BECAUSE IT FEELS SO WEIRD TO ME THAT PEOPLE OUTSIDE OF ITALY KNOW MAHMOOD TOO

“Our characters don’t click” that’s because one of you is a nice person and sadly it’s the fictional one <<<<< SFJKSGFFKSGDJ YOU AND TALAY ARE BOTH BEING SAVAGES THIS EPISODE AND I LOVE IT

Omg Talay fucking insulted Mek asjkdlfj <<<<< HIS FULL NAME IS TALAY RAWI 'IM A NICE PERSON BUT I WILL CUT A BITCH' LERTPANYA DO NOT TRY HIM (also not to be that person but talay is so hot when he's angry)

I know I’d probably be on Mek’s side if Tess was still himself and the show’s giving us a very biased pov since we’ve all grown to like Talay /and/ I’m all for revenge after being wronged but yeah I can’t help it, this guy’s a dick <<<<< weirdly enough mek is pretty much the only character in the show that im very neutral about. i recognize his narrative purpose because they needed to parallel the pangpuentalay situation in episode 7 to have talay being the one to choose puen this time around, but aside from that i don't really feel much for mek. that being said, i unfortunately have to admit that if i believed the person in front of me was tess, i would be an absolute petty bitch too ;;;;;;;;

TAWAN????? *raging war flashbacks* <<<<< SFJKSGDJGSJDG THE KINNPORSCHE EFFECT

I’m sorry but all I’m looking at is the cats // The grey one must feel really comfortable since it’s letting Jimmy hold it like a baby! The way Sea’s holding his is plain wrong though… <<<<< im pretty sure jimmy actually has a cat while sea has a dog!!!!! which would definitely explain why the cats seem so comfortable with jimmy while sea's idea for putting them at ease is meowing at them sfjksgdj also im never letting go of my puentalay cat dads headcanon!!!!! which is basically talay finding a small stray crying during a stormy night and bringing it home (because if there’s one thing he can’t resist it’s a pair of big sad eyes), and he wasn't really planning for the cat to stay but puen has already named it and now it’s too late. and then one day talay gets home and there are TWO CATS in their living room because puen thought the kitty needed a friend to keep him company while they’re at work so now talay has THREE KITTENS to take care of (yes the third one is puen)

This poor guy must be like “what is wrong with this lady” <<<<< pang really said 'if puen and talay can let their friends be actors in the movie then i can kidnap this random stranger who happens to look like a famous actor in our universe to play in it too'

TESS HAS NOT ONLY ONE BUT /TWO/ PEOPLE INEXPLICABLY LIKING HIM???? <<<<< you've already watched episode 9 so you know mek didn't really mean it but when i watched the show the first time around i remember thinking that at least mek was attracted to tess in the past but hated him because he was an asshole and only started to like him now that he's actually talay (and lbr who wouldn't love talay), meanwhile im still sitting here wondering why the hell tun never stopped being in love with that jerk

“I’m going back to liking him” Puen to himself: “brb gotta check if there’s enough budget left to hire an assassin” <<<<< puen sitting there like 'i should have known the talay effect is too powerful and now i can't even blame this guy because talay IS nice and cute and of course every single person on the planet would fall in love with him i've just played myself once again'

“My mood is just cloudy grey” ROLLLL CREDI– <<<<< me every time a character mentions the title of the episode/show/movie: [points at the screen] THEY SAID THE THING!!!!!!!!!

I see you smiling after Puen touched your belly Talay <<<<< talay tries not to show it but he's just so ridiculously fond and charmed by everything puen does THEY'RE BOTH SO GONE FOR EACH OTHER IM EMBARRASSED FOR THEM

But also what is this whole scene <<<<< IT'S TWO BESTIES BEING RIDICULOUS TOGETHER AND YOU MUST BE TIRED OF HEARING ME SAY THIS BUT IM SO HAPPY THEY CAN BE SILLY AND HAVE FUN TOGETHER LIKE ACTUAL FRIENDS

I mean, mirroring each other would be the perfect excuse to kiss……. // Oh? OH???? // GO FUCK YOURSELF TALAY <<<<< WHEN I TELL YOU TALAY LOVES TO TEASE PUEN WHICH IS GOING TO TRANSLATE TO HIM SEXUALLY FRUSTRATING PUEN TO NO END AFTER THEY GET TOGETHER

Puen being jealous here is completely different from what I mentioned earlier, here I actually get it even if jealousy is never a good thing <<<<< this is just my personal interpretation but I've honestly never read puen as being jealous here, not more than talay was of pang in episode 7 anyway, which was not at all, not really. like puen says, he knows that talay doesn't have feelings for mek, but both him and talay have this fear of being left behind, of not getting to love the person they have feelings for, while also being selfless enough to take a step back if they (mistakenly) believe the other could be happy with someone else. that's why mek was essential as the last step to make puentalay happen, because in ep 7 talay needed puen to choose him, but puen also needed talay to choose him back, and when talay finally does there's nothing standing between them anymore, not even themselves

Puen listening to the perfect sad music to fuel his broken heart <<<<< puen was also listening to music when he was being all sad in episode 6 I JUST LOVE HOW CONSISTENT THIS SHOW IS AND I LOVE PUEN MY MOST BELOVED CRINGEFAIL SAD KITTEN SWEET POTATO DARLING IDIOT

Grabbing his cheeks omg <<<<< not to be incredibly sappy but TALAY IS HOLDING HIS ENTIRE WORLD IN HIS HANDS!!!!!!!

“I haven’t even seen your face, yet I like you” MY HEART!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! // I was worried Talay was gonna blow it after Puen showed so much vulnerability but THIS IS GREAT, I’M SO HAPPY // FINALLY!!!!!! <<<<< THERE AREN'T ENOUGH WORDS IN ANY HUMAN LANGUAGE TO PROPERLY EXPLAIN HOW MUCH I LOVE THIS ENTIRE CONFESSION SCENE JUST SCREAMING SHAKING CRYING THROWING UP SPINNING COUNTERCLOCKWISE ON THE FLOOR WAILING KICKING HOWLING PASSING OUT. the fact that it happens when the lights are out to emphasize that their feelings aren’t about the bodies they inhabit but about who they are!!!!!! puen being so overwhelmed with emotions he needs to grab talay’s wrist to ground himself!!!!!! the tear falling down puen’s cheek and the ear graze and the hand at the small of talay’s back!!!!!! THE KISS PARALLELING THE ONE IN EP 4!!!!!! and not to be that person again but you can actually hear NOISES under the music!!!!!! and i do love that talay likes to tease puen but they both know when it's time to be serious and honest with each other which is why they communicate so well!!!!!! CAN SOMEONE JUST PUT ME OUT OF MY MISERY THIS IS GETTING SO EMBARRASSING

Also is this the right time to bring up that they are using other people’s bodies to make out…….. <<<<< SFJKSGDJSGDKS SHHHH WE KNOW BUT WE DO NOT TALK ABOUT THAT

[eviltiddyproductions]

Crash Course in Romance : Episode 7

Oh no Chiyeol survived which means my boy Sunjae is toast

why does Sua care more about Haee than herself lmaooo she was disappointed that her teacher was just a customer.

I thought that he had a sophisticated palate and all this time they’re talking about normal daily Korean food like girl daily food is still sophisticated. Sua’s mom’s so !??😭✋ like sister you yelled at a table and scratched someone.

bring out the champagne!!!! Nam Haee is a topper <3333

I need to bottle her best friend and keep her with me she’s cheering so loud. 💗💗💗

and her student ice hockey man is dozing 🤣

also they’re in 11th grade so I once again beg Sua, is it THAT SERIOUS

she’s hospitalised which means Sunjae and Haee are about to be toast… sua and her mom will ruin people’s lives before a little REQUIRED introspection

see ? see ? lying pale with an IV drip next to you and you’re saying it’s because one girl got more marks than you 💀 what is her fixation. but how is her mom that OLD and not getting it. like you’re about to bulldoze someone’s life for this

I hate them so much. I actually do not care and hope she fails idk a girl can dream 🤩

I would say Sunjae’s mom get your act together but a literal stomach pumping trip to the doctor didn’t give her a wake up call so idk what will

everybody in this family forgets the cover story of her being married and you can see it in the interactions. like even I forgot it before he asked about her dad 🤣

oh they’re playing handball and Mr Ji is just there 😭😭😭

I’m not even mad at this one of my favourite tropes, one person bandages/takes care of someone as the other one steals glances

wow for the first time Sua didn’t blame Hanee for her problems but her mom brought it up again. like your daughter is clearly panicking and going through something but go off dragging my girls through the mud again 🤩

oh my god WHEN WILL IT END if the Sua’s were not enough or Sunjae’s mom now it’s the jealous tuition teacher let it gooooooo

why does he get to access my baby’s records omg FREE US

damn I feel bad for lawyer lady now why was he so aggressive 😟

they’re both dressed for a date to go to the doctor 🤣

the daughter setting them up for a date as Jaewoo tries to join in lmao

he looks horrified at the thought of acupuncture lmaoooo look at him

she’s just smiling 🥹🥰

they held hands

he remembered her name !!!

ohhh it’s a full location change, that’s why he missed the similarities

just realised the mother and the younger version of Haengseon look so similar!!! great casting.

apparently Sua connects the dots in the next episode and taking a page from her book I’m going to throw the biggest tantrum 😍 I hate it here