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prongsmydeer · 1 year

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Ayesha Liveblogs The Good Place S3

Michael personally intervening on behalf of all of his friends is SO SWEET. I love him

Honestly I am eating up Tahani’s fake Vogue interview, I love one (1) out-of-touch celebrity

“K, will you make me the happiest man in the world and agree to be my wife?” Jason proposing to every person he meets is also endearing in its own way. He’s so sincere about it LMAO

Patiently awaiting when he proposes to Chidi and Eleanor. Even Pillboi was not immune

Honestly sneaking around and altering the mechanics of the universe that more powerful immortal beings are overseeing has worked in Michael’s favour so far, so why stop now?

Silly of them not to caption it, but pretty certain Chidi’s French dialogue exchange was, “T’es prêt, Chidi?” “Allez-y sans moi, je suis là.” “D’accord. À tout à l'heure.” (”Ready Chidi?” “Go on without me, I’m [almost] there.” “Alright. See you later.”)

Eleanor getting immediately defensive about being present for Chidi as if they have not been drawn together in like 800 separate universes:

“Chidi, your brain is broken, you need to fix your brain.” Uzo said: Good friends tell you when you need therapy

“You just march into my office unannounced, tell me your brain is broken, and demand I drop everything and just put you in the university’s 3 million dollar MRI machine?” This is why Chidi and Eleanor are soulmates LMAO. Very goal-oriented

“You’re so weird. Let’s go!” I like Simone even though I’m certain she’s not Australian

Hahahahahah Eleanor imagining everyone in every story as sexy explains a lot about how she operates. That and she has hot friends

“We torture like 30 billion humans. Why do you care so much about these four?” Glenn asks a very reasonable question

Hahahaha I wonder how they decide what things to describe as objectively terrible in this show. Is it one writer or is it by committee

“Goodness isn’t something that a person inherently has. It’s something that she achieves through her actions.” I love how in every abstract example they use ‘she’ instead of ‘he.’ Both because Eleanor is the main character and because it’s refreshing

“I can’t just do things like that.” Chidi confirming he has never made a move on anyone and has only been subject to his girlfriend’s moves

“I’ve been running simulations on what their kids would be like. One of them is hot enough to be on The Bachelor, and smart enough to never go on The Bachelor.” LMAO JANET

Also Michael said: Team Cheleanor 4 eternity (me too)

Also also also: Janet finally embracing Michael as her dad for one (1) minute hahaha

Michael’s love and want to help his friends also being their downfall 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭:

“I was never really that into her, no offense.” Eleanor immediately charming Tahani by not caring about her sister hahah

Tahani said: Uno reverse, I’m the Buddhist monk now, Jason

Tahani turning her near death experience and subsequent moral crisis into a self-help book that makes her more rich and well-known than before. Honestly good for her, get ur money girl

“I want you thinking about dance 24/7. That means every day you think 20 thoughts about dance for seven minutes.” Jason’s dialogue continues to be as iconic on Earth as it was in the afterlife

I love that we’re finally meeting Donkey Doug of the Sixty-Person-Dance-Crew-Boogie-Board-Moral-Relativism story:

Fhfhkfhfkjhfkjfh all the people who walked out because they weren’t allowed to crime LOL

“When I’m with you, I feel like the sky’s the limit.” Pillboi is also a good friend, if not a good person kghjkghgj

“But I met new friends who helped me become a better... person.” I love Michael and Jason’s existential heart-to-hearts. I think he resonates with Eleanor and Jason most for obvious reasons

Also the hesitation for Michael to describe himself as a person HA

I also love the Side Arc of Michael making friends with Burt Hummel, the Doorman to Earth Who Loves Frogs:

“We did it, Janet. We got away with it,” said Michael, in what I’m sure isn’t foreshadowing of this immediately biting them in the ass

OMG NOT THE RETURN OF ADAM SCOTT AS TREVOR THE ME TOO DEMON LMAO

I won’t lie to you, it wasn’t until the whip-it cannisters that I understood that a whip-it is a physical object and not an action, and apparently a more sophisticated equivalent of huffing glue. Who knew? Not me!

“Darling do you remember all the rules about what can and cannot be worn in an MRI?” Tahani calling Eleanor darling <3 Also take off the metal girl

JANET’S ON EARTH AND READY TO FIGHT FOR HER HOMIES:

(Drive-by commentary that Janet is hot—the uniform suits her!)

Janet and Michael are really struggling to deal with their mortal coil(s)

Firm believer that consensual sex between informed adults is morally neutral, but Tahani and Jason flirting does feel like infidelity lol (poor Janet)

“I’m sorry, but [not being friends] is just how it has to be.” IS THAT TRUE, CHIDI

Demon-All-Knowing-Personal-Assistant-Nicer-Demon standoff in the bathroom

“I got a solid eight minutes, not consecutively, but that’s fine. You’re barely even blurry.” I know it’s probably not in my best interests to strongly identify with Chidi but I strongly identify with Chidi

I’m very glad that Jason and Tahani didn’t drunkenly hook up but I do still view any of their flirting as an affront to Jason’s wife Janet LOL

“I’m asking you as a friend,” said Chidi, while simultaneously also not letting go of the belief that it’s unethical for them to be friends

“These four humans are all I care about in the universe.” MICHAEL ❤️

NOT THE JUDGE BLAMING MICHAEL AND JANET FOR BREXIT AND THE GREATEST SHOWMAN LMAO

I was certain Simone wasn’t Australian but it turns out that she’s British which kind of tracks accent-wise

“Good luck, Frog Man. I’m pulling for you.” HAHAHAHAHA Jeff (Burt Hummel) is a perfect addition to Michael’s incredible group of friends

They also all have in common a disregard for authority

NOT JANET AND MICHAEL STALKING THEIR FRIENDS LMAO

“I’m sad to inform you I’m too stupid and ugly to be in the study and I’m going home to my mommy.” Michael’s schoolyard insults are something else

I do think Eleanor having to work an in-between job would help provide a sense of normal moral conditions for her. Morality does not exist in a vacuum of your closest homies, even if Janet and Michael want it to be so

“If I’m going to the mall anyway, I might as well pick Jason up some jean shorts. The kind with the frayed edges, where you can see the pockets coming out of the bottom. So that he can study better.” Janet wanting to get her secret husband a Christmas present

Tahani hooking up with Larry Hemsworth who also has self-worth issues in relation to his more famous siblings hahahahha

“You and Jason, imagine that. Actually, I have.” Eleanor is truly attracted to ALL of her friends

“I gotta go barf one last time, and then I’ll be ready to study philosophy.” That sums up my university experience

I know it’s just one little split-screen but Eleanor singing happy birthday (which she said she hated doing for coworkers) while Jason reads a philosophy book on his own time...... I love them

“I can’t wait til we move far away from the likes of you, and I can finally take her last name.” I’m kind of rooting for Larry Al-Jamil

“Feeling like your little team is the last thing standing between you and oblivion, and that at any moment, the universe could fold up around you and squeeze the last breath from your dying lungs.” Michael’s pep talks have gotten a lot more morose since the Sports Bar

“Let’s all stay here, and keep it going,” said Eleanor, in a moment of emotional vulnerability that she is definitely going to regret immediately

Eleanor smashing a cake out of caring about other people too much vs. her first smashing a cake out of caring about her self-preservation too much is really a full circle moment:

“As humans evolved, the first big problem we had to overcome was ‘me vs. us.’ Learning to sacrifice a little individual freedom for the benefit of the group. You know, sharing food and resources so we don’t starve or get eaten by tigers, things like that. The next problem to overcome is ‘us vs. them.’ Trying to see other groups, different from ours, as our equals.” Ohhhhhh we’ve hit upon the moral underpinning of the season. Hello, our new Kierkegarde

“This is all we have, Janet. We have Chidi, and Eleanor, and Tahani and Jason and that is it.” Michael I think it’s time for you to make some new friends

“Serious question? Should we kill them?” HAHAHAH MICHAEL. He said improvise adapt overcome baybeee

Once again the rules of the afterlife seem so unfair because they learned about it by accident and they’re just people who really love their friends

I love how absurd this show is. I 100% accept that time in the afterlife moves in a Jeremy Bearimy and that nothing never happens on Tuesdays and July

“Now that I know how it all ends, I just want to be virtuous for virtue’s sake.” Tahani takes down the concept of moral desserts in one single sentence:

Also her skin is literally sparkling, everyone in this show is SO pretty

Honestly shocked it’s taken this long for Chidi to quote Nietzsche

Chidi said: I heard you were calling everyone hot, I would like to submit my name for consideration:

Also Chidi finally fulfilling the ‘surprisingly ripped’ prophecy with a full-length shot of himself shirtless LOL

“And then, a recommendation of how we feel the afterlife could be improved. And we turn ourselves in, we’ll give it to the judge. Hopefully she’ll read it. We failed, Janet. But maybe one day, someone else will succeed.” Michael having goals of improving the afterlife beyond his immediate circle of friends 😭💘😭💘😭💘😭💘 I LOVE ONE (1) DEMON

The little nod to the young-person-older-person tech divide with Michael

“In America, everyone does what they want. Society did break down. It’s terrible, and it’s great!” HAHAHAHAH I know someone enjoyed writing that

Eleanor going on a whole adventure for this man’s wallet ❤️ That’s my girl

HAHAHHAA is the concept of getting into heaven the only thing between Chidi and knocking around mountains of junk food shirtless at a grocery store:

Chidi’s boisterous “Hello!” after the morose groceries got me

The cut between Chidi giving up his car and not really seeing anymore purpose to anything he does in life and Tahani and Jason joyfully chucking money to people is this meme:

Also Jason offering money to the baby is PERFECT, I LOVE HIM

“I could’ve gone to a real doctor, instead of pretending I was a big dog, so I could go to the vet.” Will someone save the United States of America

If Canada ever privatizes healthcare, I will have to move or die

It’s actually the mark of a good bank that they won’t just let Tahani impulsively transfer all her money, prevents financial abuse

“You’re a good person, Eleanor. I really hope my daughter turns out like you when she grows up.” ELEANOR 😭😭😭😭😭😭

HAHAHAHHAAH CHIDI’S STUDENTS WATCHING HIM MAKE M&M-PEEPS-CHILLI

“The actual ethical system that you should all follow is nihilism.” The meme was foreshadowing. I don’t know why I didn’t expect it become explicit, he is a moral philosophy professor

CHIDI TRYING TO TAKE THE CHILLI WITH HIM LMAO:

NOT JASON AND TAHANI GETTING MARRIED. WHERE DOES BIGAMY FALL ON THE POINTS SCALE LMAO

Appreciate the immediate clarification it was platonic tho

I don’t blame Tahani for forgetting Larry Hemsworth because I also forgot Larry Hemsworth until he reappeared even though it was literally one episode ago they established their engagement kghkjghg

All of them deciding to be better people for other people’s sake, including Janet and Michael, who are not people 💗 [CHIDI VOICE] SIMPLY PUT, WE ARE NOT IN THIS ALONE

“Nathan Burlingame.” “Didn’t like you.” “Kylie Mansnard?” “Thought you were cool but intimidating.” “No way! I thought she was intimidating. That’s why I shoved her into that creek.” I love that we’re acknowledging Eleanor’s bisexuality outside of her friend group

Happy Pride Month to Eleanor, whose methods of showing affection are consistent

“I’ve done that to dozens of people, and all of them got over it.” “Actually, none of your exes have ever got over you.” “You’re damn right they didn’t.” Hee hee hee Eleanor

“I’ve heard you mention your friend Pillboi many times, but I’ve not heard you mention your father once.” “What do you mean? I talk about Donkey Doug all the time.” WHAT!!!!!!!!!!! HONESTLY THIS HAS SHOCKED ME MOST IN THE SHOW SINCE THE REVEAL OF THE BAD PLACE

Jason’s Dad Donkey Doug 🤝 Eleanor’s Mum

Immediately hitting on their child’s partner when they meet

“That’s the first time that line has ever failed.” Jason touching his heart like he’s proud of her for not having sex with his dad LMAO:

“Do you spray it on yourself, or do you drink it?” “You both it.” Someone give Pillboi an MBA

“More guys should be bi. It’s 2018. It’s like, get over yourselves.” HAHAHAH Eleanor, defeating internalized biphobia, one guy at a time

Michael 🤝 Chidi

Fixing all of their problems with reset buttons

Unequivocally, someone dumping me while giving me a puppy would be the best way to break up and I would forgive them immediately. Chidi has cracked the code:

HAHAHAHAH ELEANOR USING HER TIME IN THE SIMULATION TO VIRTUALLY MAKE OUT WITH SIMONE

“You hooked us up with [redacted] channels every year since the third grade.” MAYBE DONKEY DOUG SHOULD BE IN JAIL

“What a weird creep. Why was I friends with him?” HAHAHA Tahani finally name drops someone who she dislikes and it’s Elon Musk, perfect

[Talk-To-The-Hand Gesture] “Ya dumped.” KHGHGKHGKJ this is what happens when you spend so much time with Eleanor. Also how did we get from puppies to this

“Hey, call me Donkey Dad.” Awwww. I don’t think prison would make Donkey Doug better but he definitely made the right call in taking the blame for the factory robbery

“My feelings have changed. I wish I could tell you why, but I can’t.” This is both honest and also alludes to the fact that Chidi can and will have feelings for Eleanor

Michael’s little [“you okay”] smile to Janet when Jason calls Tahani his wife ☹️☹️☹️☹️

Tahani’s immediately hostile expression on learning that one of Eleanor’s parents is alive and made Eleanor mourn them or no reason:

Love this episode of Tahani and Eleanor confronting their family trauma head on

“Can we do this for all the paintings?” JANET-JASON BONDING TIME ❤️❤️❤️ THEY ARE THE SLOW-BURN ROMANCE AT THE HEART OF THIS SHOW

“Young lady, you will stop this nonsense, go to the PTA meeting and support your mother, I won’t hear another word about it.” AWWW MICHAEL TRYING OUT THE DAD VIBES

“All of your fears are mine now.” Lmao @ Kamilah sussing out the one thing that could disrupt Chidi’s pursuit of helping his friend

Michael The Eleanor’s Dad Friend and Torture Architect and Dave The Eleanor’s Stepdad and Regular Architect is sooooo cute. I love when Michael makes new friends

“Why can’t you accept that she might be living a good, honest life? That she’s an attentive partner and a good mom?” “Because I wanted that mom!” Wow this really is the sibling trauma ep

Michael referring to himself as Eleanor’s self-appointed father figure 😭❤️

“They were wankers, weren’t they?” THIS IS SIBLING CULTURE!!!!

Hahahaha Michael’s little suspicious side comments about human things like going to the bathroom kill me

Also the fact that they have human bodies on Earth but no digestion LMAO

“I’m glad my mom has changed, but that doesn’t fix all the damage that she did to me.” A healthy and honest way to look at it ❤️

“I have no real ability to gauge physical attractiveness in humans.” Michael said: Don’t ever ask me if you looked hot again, Eleanor, it’s icky and I hated that

I love the Mirror Centaur, it’s both a good bit of self-reflection for Tahani and an expansion of the lore

Eleanor and Chidi’s love story is cute but I am threatened by title of the ep (The Worst Possible Use of Free Will)

“There’s no such thing as soulmates, you dingus.” OMG MICHAEL

“It’s a basic reality show playbook. Put a bunch of attractive young people in stressful situations, so they act like idiots and have sex with each other.” ELEANOR EXPLAINING HER FEELINGS AWAY WITH DETERMINISM AND REALITY TV

However, she makes some pretty good points lmao

I love seeing what they write on these Split-Second Prop Boards LOL:

“What if all YOUR choices are predetermined?” Eleanor said I see your 15-million-point-torture-plan, Michael and raise you one (1) frustrating woman who has studied a lot of philosophy and hates admitting to affection

“Because if everything is determined and we have no free will, then all this stuff we’re doing to put more good into the world is pointless. And I want to believe that it matters.” MICHAEL ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ WE LOVE ONE (1) DEMON WHO LITERALLY UNDERSTANDS THE MECHANICS OF THE UNIVERSE AND STILL CHOOSES TO HAVE HIS OWN BELIEFS

Omg hey Vicky aka Real Eleanor, long time no see

I have no idea who they’ve cast as the model of Humanity’s Potential for the Good Place in Rural Canada but I am hoping and placing my bet that it’s William Daniels (Mr. Feeny of Boy Meets World)

Update from 10 seconds later: IT’S NOT, IT’S DOUG FORCETT, THE GUY WHO GUESSED MOST OF THE AFTERLIFE

Ggkhgjhgkjh all these reflections on how people help each other to become better, and Janet and Michael choose Doug Pisswater, Friend to Snails, as their new Jesus

I love when Jason and Chidi hang out. It teaches Chidi to chill out!! The lessons go both ways

“When is the right time to tell someone you were passionate lovers in an alternate timeline in the afterlife, but he doesn’t remember because technically none of that happened in this strand of the multiverse?” I feel like this is a better question for Eleanor to ask Janet than Tahani

Hee hee hee, Jason and Chidi bonding is soooo cute:

OMG THIS HAS ESCALATED SO FAST, THE BAR OF DEMONS HAS ARRIVED

Still kills me that Bambadjan is playing Bambadjan

Also, HOW DOES DOUSING A MOLOTOV COCKTAIL IN ALCOHOL NOT ACT AS AN ACCELERANT

“Screw this. Let’s fight.” YEAHHHHHHHH JANET, GET ‘EM

Honestly, for a show about morality, it has been surprisingly void of fight scenes until now

“Is it just me, or is Janet a straight-up hottie right now?” I gotta applaud Eleanor for her consistency

“I don’t want just any wasp nostrils, I want these wasp nostrils.” I guess Janet and Michael have inadvertently made their friends the most desirable people for the Bad Place because it’s been so hard to keep them in hell LOL

[Kicks Shawn through a portal] “I mean, why let the guy keep saying mean stuff?” Michael and Janet are an unbeatable duo

I love that they’re starting to actually interrogate the system itself:

Season 1: Something is wrong in the Good Place - we will learn about ethics to earn our place here

Season 2: We need to escape the Bad Place - we have learned enough to justify not being punished for moral failures we have made progress on

Season 3: We have escaped death, but now we need to decide what goodness in people actually means, and why we are even subscribing to this model to begin with

Incredibly impressed by D’Arcy Carden’s ability to embody each of the other four main characters. I wonder if they did this shot for shot with the other actors!!!

“So, literally the entire universe is against you.” Poor four humans, caught in the middle of an interdimensional ethical struggle

“If I’m right, we will find proof that the Bad Place is tampering with the points system.” Call me crazy, but I think the underlying issue is the existence of a point system, and I hope there’s something beyond that scope that explains why the afterlife is so fucked up

“We’re in a void, in the body of a white lady--” “Not a lady.” I also love this consistency and Janet’s she-her-and-Not-a-Lady energy

“Let’s all say white people things. ‘Billy Joel.’ ‘I found it on Etsy.’ ‘There was nowhere to park.’ ‘Did you refill the Brita?’” HAHAHAHHAHAHA I also love that 3/4 of the people Janet is embodying are not white. I can’t imagine what I’d do if I died and woke up white. I don’t think I’d do well as a white person

ELEANOR USING THE VOID TO SUMMON A PUPPY FOR CHIDI. I LOVE HOW MANY DOGS CHIDI GETS TO PLAY WITH THIS SEASON, IT’S SO MANY MORE DOGS THAN ANY PREVIOUS SEASON

“Richard Moore of Sugar Land, Texas, hollowed out an eggplant and filled it with hot sauce and nickels.” I don’t know why this is so funny, but it is

Eleanor 🤝 Chidi

Using philosophy lessons to explain away your feelings

“Just because you don’t remember doing something, doesn’t mean you didn’t do it. I have no idea how it happened, but there is definitely a tattoo on my butt that says, ‘Jasom.’” Jason’s philosophical commentary is both practical and true

Michael is so mad for humanity not being allowed into the Good Place ❤️‍🩹

I’m now leaning towards the idea that there ISN’T a Good Place. Why haven’t we met anyone from there, expect that one person in that Mindy St. Clair video LOL

“I was just chillin’ being nothing, and then all of a sudden, I was.” Hahahah, Void Pillboi thinks, therefore he is

“When was the last time someone got into the Good Place?” “The last time someone got into the Good Place was... 521 years ago.” !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The real question is how Jason-Janet and Eleanor-Janet managed to switch clothing without Chidi-Janet noticing LOL they’re all in one void

[In falsetto] “I’m Chidi, I’m Eleanor, I’m Arizona shrimp horny.” Every line on this show, but especially Jason’s, deserves an Emmy

I just looked it up and this show didn’t receive a SINGLE Emmy? Whack

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS WE ARE FINALLY GETTING JASON TO KNOW THAT HE AND JANET WERE MARRIED AGAIN (this is also how I feel when I look at Jason:

“If he’s not gonna to fix this, who is?” “You, Michael.” DEMON FRIEND GOING TO SAVE THE WORLD ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Chidi monologuing everything he knows about Eleanor to save her identity because who she is matters so much to him 🥺❤️🥺❤️🥺❤️

I CANNOT BELIEVE WE GOT A SIMULTANEOUS JANET/JANET, ELEANOR/JANET, CHIDI/JANET KISS. INCREDIBLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

GOOD FOR THEM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“I need one of you to volunteer to do something outrageously insane that will either make you cease to exist or be really fun.” JASON JASON JASON

HAHAHAHAHAH the immediate follow-up in them realizing it didn’t actually give them any information by having Jason go up the mail tube first

“Holy forking shirtballs. We’re in the Good Place.” WOO, GO TEAM COCKROACH

“What kind of a messed-up place would turn away refugees.” SO many, Jason

HAHAHAHAH Jason adding insane and bizarre details to their lies, but to be fair in a Good-Place-Accounting-Bad-Place trichotomy I guess it is somewhat believable to be chased by a Dracula with a bazooka

Awwwww now Chidi is comforting Eleanor about her Good Place crisis! You know what that is! Growth

I love Gwendolyn the Good Place Mailwoman With No Follow-Up Questions

“I feel bad that I sort of like, read her diary, and she doesn’t know.” Jason has his own moral code and it incudes minding ya business ❤️

“Why not have our first date four Oreos away from paradise?” Chidi DOES have a romantic bone in his non-corporeal body

“Every single Bad Place employee is a disgusting monster.” Awww, poor Michael

“Are all humans as attractive as you two [Tahani and Jason]?” [Chuckles] “No.” TRUE LMAO HOTTEST FRIENDS

CHIDI DRESSING UP A SEXY MAILMAN FOR THEIR FIRST DATE. BEST BOYFRIEND

How is letting people be tortured for hundreds of years a morally neutral action? I just don’t believe that this version of the Good Place exists

TAHANI MAKING AN DEATH DID US PART CERTIFICATE SO JANET AND JASON DON’T FEEL BURDENED BY THE TAHANI-JASON MARRIAGE. I LOVE THESE FRIENDS ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

“’There is only one time that is important, now. It is the only time when we have any power.’“ I love Chidi’s philosophy comments that are driven out of love from the people around him. I know he’s quoting Tolstoy but still

“You gotta try.” ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ ELEANOR SHELLSTROP, PHILOSOPHER

Eleanor using this as an immediate segue into sex HAHAHAHA

“There are so many unintended consequences to well-intentioned actions. Feels like a game you can’t win.” THAT’S WHAT I’VE BEEN SAYING

TAHANI AND JANET CRYING BECAUSE THEY LOVE THEIR FRIENDS SO MUCH AND JASON CRYING BECAUSE HE LIKES TO BE PART OF THINGS:

“Any chance I can change real quick?” “No.” TIME TO SAVE THE UNIVERSE AS A SEXY MAILMAN, CHIDI

“Do you wanna try being boyfriend-girlfriend?” “I’m not a girl. But yes, I’d very much like to go on a date with you, somewhere, sometime.” JASONJANET IS BACK BAYBEEEEEEEEE 💘💘💘💘💘💘💘

“I never yelled at Big Noodle for being late again, because I knew hard it was for him to be there.” I LOVE philosophy lessons with Jason

Michael keeps saying if people don’t agree with him, they can kill him and his homies, as if he has not, at every turn, gotten his friends out of harm’s way every single time someone has wanted to get rid of them, and literally in the same episode said he would throw them into the next dimensional portal to keep trying. Michael said: My moral code is Janet’s ride-or-die protocol

“Also, I guess I’m Black, and they do not like Black ladies down there.” HOW CAN THE ALL-KNOWING JUDGE OF THE UNIVERSE NOT KNOW ABOUT RACISM AND MISOGYNOIR???

“Oh no, you are nobody’s problem, sweetheart.” Finally someone other than Eleanor appreciating Chidi for his looks hahahahah

Jason and Janet are so excellent at communicating their feelings. ALSO I LOVE JEALOUS JASON, RECIPROCITY:

It has not been lost on me this whole time that Janet and Jason, and Chidi and Eleanor, have had to fall in love at least three separate times over three separate universes over three separate seasons. I can’t wait for them to get some time to actually BE in love, together, continuously

Also I hope Tahani finds someone she loves (though gunning for it not to be a white man though LOL)

NOT ELEANOR REQUESTING TO LIVE IN THE TORTURE CLOWN HOUSE ❤️ I ALSO KINDA MISSED IT

OMG NO THAT’S SO SAD, THEY’RE GONNA MAKE THE FOUR HUMANS EXPERIENCE ACTUAL TORTURE (NOT JUST EMOTIONAL TURMOIL) FROM THEIR BEST DEMON BUDDY’S FACE

“It’s going to be so amazing watching your four BFFs look so sad and betrayed and confused, as you, their reformed demon daddy, unleash a swarm of... penis-bees.” EVEN SADDER, THEIR REFORMED DEMON DADDY 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 MICHAEL!!!!!!!

Michael experiencing his first panic attack in the very first step of the experiment lmao

HAHAHAHAHAHAH Eleanor immediately jumping in as architect. There were so many better ways to handle this. Just have Janet knock him out again

“You’re like the Blake Bortles of whatever’s going on right now.” These is a very good compliment from Jason, he holds Eleanor in high esteem

ALSO JASON BEING BACK IN HIS JIANYU OUTFITS HA

NOT JOHN BEING THE PEREZ HILTON OF THE GOOD PLACE

I like that Simone’s back, and I hope she ends up as Tahani’s lover this time around, that’d be fun and a nice way to wrap up the couples

Chidi requesting for a mind-wipe to avoid his ex so he has to fall in love with Eleanor a fourth (FOUR HUNDREDTH) TIME OH MY GOD

“This is a classic human situation. Your friends are going through something awful, and there’s nothing you can do about it.” Harsh but true

“Every time you see me get a stomach-ache, imagine I’m thinking of you.” “So, all the time.” 😭😭😭😭😭

Of this whole romantic montage of all of Eleanor and Chidi’s memories, it’s them on the boat together that got me. Eleanor being part of Chidi’s idea of a perfect day. Something something existing in each other’s comfort zone

I did not expect for anything to make me tear up but Chidi’s voice breaking as he said he was going to miss Eleanor got me

“Time means nothing. Jeremy Bearimy, baby. We’ll get through this, and then you and I will chill out in the dot in the i forever.” Chidi is SO romantic now. That’s growth!!!!!!!!!!

Eleanor and Janet have truly been on the same romantic page this whole time. They have parallel journeys of love and loss

“In the words of the man that I love: I got you dog.” JANET 😭❤️

I really do love this show so much

#ayesha says things #liveblogging #ayesha liveblogs tgp #the good place #television #long post #the good place spoilers #again it's been out for years but just so u know it'll be on this blog now lol

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jumpywhumpywriter · 2 months

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Whumpee Pulls Uno-Reverse on Whumper

Warnings: captivity, blood, broken bones, intoxication

This is another scene from my in-progress fantasy trilogy!

Summary: Shadow is held captive at the Jackal’s headquarters to be experimented on as Sebastian works to find a way to weaponize her powers, but one day is different from the rest. A group of three guards who are off-duty decide to spend their free time drinking and laughing and poking fun at their captive subject named Shadow... when Shadow suddenly decides to join the fun.

-------------------------------------------------------

Shadow watched hatefully from inside her cell as the three off-duty guards laughed and had fun right on the other side of the room, while she was chained up like a rabid animal behind bars. The Jackal's test subject. The metal shackles on her wrists had rubbed the skin raw, and there was a chain that stretched between them that kept her from being able to fully stretch her arms out, that was attached to a ring bolted to the floor. She was already in a foul mood to begin with, and hearing the guards' snobbish voices only made it worse.

She recognized two of the humans; the larger guard with black hair was Jacob, and the slightly shorter one with brown hair was his obnoxious brother John. She didn't know the third man.

But she observed the beer all three of them held in her hands as they drank on their off-time. She'd seen what an effect alcohol had on humans when they consumed too much... so she made a mental note in case the knowledge would be useful later.

"Sebastian's got himself a pretty new toy," Jacob suddenly sneered, casting a glance at Shadow. And just like that she was the center of attention for the three drunk men that jeered at her.

She tried her best to ignore them, but her blood was boiling with anger.

"I heard Sebastian's trying to turn her into some kinda war weapon, or a dangerous house pet," John snickered playfully. "If it were up to me, though, I know the only way to get these kind of freaks to listen is to beat them into submission. Violence is the only form of communication these monsters respect."

All three men burst into laughter, but the whole room went silent when Shadow unexpectedly joined in, her cold, humorless laughter drowning them out.

"Brave words, for someone outside this cell I'm in," she chuckled darkly. "If I didn't know better, I'd say you're scared of me." Her blue eyes glittered with something dark and dangerous, and her voice was filled with several layers of condescending mockery. "Say all you what about me, but I know none of you would ever have the guts to step into my cage and say those things to my face. You're all fooling yourselves if you say otherwise." Shadow shrugged, chains rattling with the movement. "But who am I to judge? A fear of me is just common sense."

"Are you just gonna let her talk to you like that?" Jacob gave John a drunken shove toward Shadow's cell, laughing.

"I may be drunk, but I ain't dumb," John snapped. "If you want to punish her for it, by all means go ahead! I'm not stepping in there."

"See? Coward," Shadow sneered. "Anyone else want to take a chance with me? Or am I allowed to run my snarky mouth whenever I want without consequence?" She egged them on, intentionally riling them all.

"Come on, John," Jacob teased, "I'll pay you fifty bucks to step in the same cage with her for a solid minute without chickening out." His voice slurred badly.

John shook his head, then smiled crookedly. "Counteroffer. I'll give ya a hundred bucks if you step in there and teach her a lesson instead."

Shadow chuckled with amusement at their drunken bickering, rising to her feet and slinking as close to the front of her cell as the chains would allow, glaring tauntingly at Jacob.

"Go ahead, human, I dare you to take a step into my cage... trust me, your ego would be put right back in its place."

She flashed him a fang-filled grin. "Don't worry, I'm not too dangerous in these metal cuffs and restraints. It should be easy to prove you have the guts to take a step past the door." Her voice dropped low as she taunted him further, goading. "Unless you are too scared of me. I mean, seriously. I'm half your size! What are you even worried about?"

Jacob hesitated, then glanced at John again. "Make it two hundred and I'll do it," he said.

"Deal," John laughed, and stepped away to clear the way to Shadow's prison.

"Ooooh, someone's got a spine," Shadow cooed, and Jacob's whole face reddened with embarrassment, humiliated in front of his friends.

"I think it's high time someone taught you a lesson about respect," Jacob spat, and whipping out his electric baton, he stalked up to the cell door, unlocking it with his keycard.

Shadow took a few steps back to lure him in, miming fear, her entire cocky demeanor flipping to fearful submission in a heartbeat. "Hold on! I didn't think you were actually brave enough to do it! We can talk this out!" She injected as much innocent pleading into her voice as she could, moving as far away from him as the chain tethering her to the floor would allow, drawing him in and tucking her wings to make herself appear a weaker target.

"It's far too late for apologies, monster. You're going to get exactly what you deserve for making a mockery of me!" The man activated the electric baton in his hand threateningly as he approached her.

What he didn't realize, was how Shadow was gauging how much distance her chain allowed her to travel. The man walked closer until he stepped past the metal ring in the floor, which gave her more than enough room to move around.

Shadow straightened with a wolfish grin, instantly dropping the helpless act.

"You are really, really gullible, aren't you?" She chuckled darkly, and a look of confusion creased his face for a second before she lunged at him, not giving him a chance to figure out his mistake.

He raised his baton to strike at her, but she ducked under his flailing arm and swept his legs from under him so that he landed hard on his back with a thud. She kicked the baton from his hand and stared down at him with a deceivingly friendly face laced with malice, taking pleasure in how terrified his expression became as he slowly realized what a bad position he'd put himself in. A single drunken lapse of judgment that landed him here.

"Weren't you supposed to be 'teaching me a lesson' or something?" Shadow leaned down with a cold smile, watching his eyes grow wide with fear. "Big. Mistake."

Then Jacob snapped out of his surprise and started scrambling clumsily to his feet to make a drunken dash for the door, but Shadow had enough slack in her chain to dart around him and bar the way, slamming her shoulder in his chest to push him back so that he fell to the floor again with a choked wheeze as the breath was forced out of his lungs.

"My oh my, whatever will you do?" Shadow purred in delighted amusement as she walked forward with predatory grace, and Jacob scooted back as far as he could go until his back was pressed against the far wall. Then his eyes landed on his fallen baton, and in another moment of poor judgment, he lunged across the floor for it.

"Ah, ah, ah! I didn't say you could pick that up." Shadow was quicker, and stepped between him and the baton, before smashing her fist square into his face with a sickening crack as bone crunched beneath her knuckles. He recoiled, clutching a bloodied nose, and she delivered a vicious kick to his side while he was down, where she could hear several ribs crack. The man let out a scream of pain, before curling up in a vain effort to protect himself.

Shadow casually stepped over him, before forcefully pinning him face-down on the ground with her knee on his back. Then... she looped the length of chain between her wrist cuffs around the man's throat, and applied enough pressure to keep it taut while she kept her weight on his back.

"I did warn you," she hissed into his ear.

The man started choking and writhing beneath her, hands clawing at the chain around his neck, but Shadow didn't let up on the tension. She stared straight into the faces of his shocked friends who were watching nearby as the man's struggles slowly grew weaker and weaker, until he finally stopped moving altogether. She stood up calmly and let the man's head loll limply on the ground as she brushed herself off.

"Anyone else...?" She growled, folding her arms in silent challenge. All of Jacob's friends were deathly pale and looked absolutely horrified, too scared to even move, and only complete silence followed her words.

Shadow couldn't help the sly smirk that spread across her face at that, her manacled wings twitching with amusement as she glanced down at Jacob's unconscious form. She would have loved nothing more than to kill the arrogant human right here and now... but she knew the consequences would be severe. Something told her that knocking out a lackey would be far more forgivable than killing them, once her captor caught wind of what she'd done. But she couldn't take the guards' insults anymore. She'd wanted to teach them a valuable lesson, and that's exactly what she'd done. Mission accomplished.

Her impassive gaze swept over John and the other guard, and she bared her fangs at them in a passively threatening manner.

"Now which of you brave young gentlemen would like to come in and drag this idiot out? He's going to need surgery for the broken nose." She lightly kicked his head so that the gnarly mess of blood on his face was visible to the others, his nose wrenched at an unnatural angle, partially crushed into his skull.

No one offered. And none of them bothered her again.

Masterlist

@lumpofsand

@scoundrelwithboba

@isikedmyself878

@iamheretohurt

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kcrabb88 · 2 months

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uno reverse card-ing you to ask about quinlan for the character ask game :D

Thank you! <3 Your answers were 10000/10! @ninjigma also asked me for Quin hehehe.

How I feel about this character

Quin is one of my fave guys in Star Wars, and he should be VASTLY more appreciated than he is! He's such a good-hearted and complicated guy and I love him so much.

All the people I ship romantically with this character

Obi-Wan! In some circumstances I can get behind him dating Ventress for a bit and then becoming friendly exes. But, I'm pretty exclusively a QuinObi shipper. I'm a sucker for childhood friends-to-lovers and I think they know and get each other so well.

My non-romantic OTP for this character

OMG I have a lot! I do adore his relationship with Aayla and Tholme and the three of them as a unit. They know each others strengths and weaknesses, and Tholme and Aayla always believe in Quin even if he doesn't quite believe in himself. The comics are so so great for digging into that!

@coruscantrhapsody and I also developed a bunch of foundation for a friendship between Quin and Padme, which is now in a lot of my fics. I treasure them!

Also Quin and Dex! Big fan of them.

My unpopular opinion about this character

I've talked about this a lot, but the rampant characterization of Quin as incompetent and kind of dumb is so??? I hate it?? Quin is funny! He has a sarcastic sense of humor! I dunno why that equates to "dumb" but he's actually super competent and really smart and I just. Don't get where this fanon came from.

I also have seen some things where Quin like, kind of misuses his psychometry to tease people about things and I'm of the opinion that he wouldn't do that on purpose? He's this like, psychometric prodigy pretty much, and that power, in legends in particular, is the root of some of his biggest traumas. I think he's quite serious about how and when he uses it. Like sure, he might make mistakes sometimes (especially during his bout with the dark side when he's crossing lines to accomplish his goals) but I don't think he'd use it for superfluous reasons?

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

I so desperately want to see what he did with the Path, and also really really wish we could see him reach out to Obi-Wan and/or Obi-Wan reach out to him even if just to say "I know you're alive." The "Quinlan was here?" moment in OWK hit me so hard that I got a whole ass tattoo of "only when the eyes are closed can you truly see" as a result. So, I'd just love to see that in a book or comic or something! Not that I haven't written several fics on this topic, but, you know.

#Quin my guy my love my sweetie pie #KCrabb does memes #Quinlan Vos #Star Wars tag

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oh-for-fic-sake-library · 2 years

Text

Uno reverse this shit

Masterlist

Summary: kylo refuses to fight crazy.

Warnings : swearing, shitpost, crack fic, threats of violence, small dog syndrom jedi style, no fucks were given

A/N: this isnt serious! I just wanted to play around with a funny crack fic drabble.

"Stupid little jedi you seek to fight me? I'll show you the power of the darkside;" kylo growled out as his old masters youngest prodigy stepped forward readying to fight without a weapon.

"You know what? Do it. Make my day" kylo frowned behinde his mask at that faltering for a second at the sincere angered words spat at him.

"W-what?" He asked confused by the lack of fear or anxiety. This girl was either incredibly stupid or just had a deathwish. He looked to luke, then rey who both seemed to grow more uncomfortable with the situation.

"I said do it hit me up motherfucker you and me, right now lets go!" The tiny woman spoke up still heading towards him.

"Y/n for the love of god stop antagonising him! He's the fucking supreme leader now?! What the fuck?!" Luke called out to the small enraged woman that was still stalking towards kylo unarmed.

"Id listen to your master little jedi, i will use the dark side of the force on you, torture you couldnt ever dream of;" he tried again to intimidate the small female but it didnt work she infact she began rolling up her sleeves.

"I hope the fuck you do. Because then when i use the force to rip your lungs out your asshole i wont look like the bitch" she snarled pointing at him threateningly. Okay, that was unexpected? Kylo really didnt know what to do now? She wasnt palying the part of jedi, infact she seemed worse then him? It frightened him a little bit.

"Yeah thats right I aint playing silly buggers. If you gonna be all dark side voodoo scary boy with a red glow stick ima be a the psycho bitch that fucks you up bare hands. Im gona uno reverse this shit" she uttered into the stunned silence. Though luke and rey seemed more embarrassed and disappointed then shocked by the threat.

"Did.... did she just threaten to rip my lungs out of my ass?" Kylo asked the other two hesitantly whislt pointing to the she devil glareing up at him with an unsettling look of convictionon her face. She was 100% serious. He really wasnt registering this situation at all and was completely shook.

"Yeah she can do it too.... We're still working on the whole... rage thing" rey uttered quietly rubbing the back of her neck whilst shrugging. Luke nodded in agreement.

"And i was the fucking problem?! Me?!" He screamed across the open space in an accusatory tone. Completely dumbfounded by the hypocrisy of it all. Luke did have the decency to look away sheepishly. Kylo then held his hands up muttering 'fuck this' and turning abandoning the battlefeild. He refused to fight crazy.

"Did i win? Wow that was easy" The small woman pondered outloud but kylo just wasnt getting involved. You were,luke and reys problem, not his.

#kylo ren crack fic #oh for fic sake fics #kylo ren #star wars crack #star wars kylo ren #kylo ren drabble

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gust-jar-simulator · 11 months

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Okay time for unhinged crossover logic.

There are two Links I like to subject to vampire drama: Four (I really need to invent a tag for those rambles) and Wild. To sum up the way I write them fast and dirty, the methods are as follows:

Four: In Four Swords Adventures, the split Links explode into force gems (crystallized life that is also money) when they die, and in either that game or Four Swords can be resurrected by sacrificing force gems. In addition, the Four Sword itself feeds on/must be powered up by force gems. Therefore, considering how closely tied his existence is to the sword by this point, Four must feed it (and by extension himself) life force or suffer consequences. He can improvise to a limited extent by feeding on elemental magic, or living blood, but none of it is as efficient as force gems.

Wild: After being killed by magic lasers that may or may not have been able to infect his body with Malice like a horrible STD, his brain got completely rewired by Sheikah tech. An argument could be made that he's a cyborg on some level, the Shrine of Resurrection flooding his veins with nanobots or any other sci fi method of keeping a corpse breathing. As such, like other forms of Sheikah tech, he is vulnerable to infection by Malice and the call of the Blood Moon, and might be able to literally cannibalize Guardians to repair himself as well as drain energy from shrines and towers.

(Also as a side note, considering the horrors of teleportation tech, the Sheikah database has likely memorized what makes Wild and how he was put together, and could theoretically generate another one of him if he dies again.)

Where am I inputting my crossover logic?

I've been sitting here for the past hour thinking about the concept of diablerie from Vampire: The Masquerade. To distill it to the essentials, diablerie is the act of a vampire drinking another vampire's blood to the point of final death, consuming even the soul. This has advantages in that you obtain their power level and abilities. A major disadvantage, however, involves the "consuming the soul" bit- if you're not strong enough, the vampire you ate could overwhelm your consciousness. Uno reverse is a bitch.

Diablerie also happens to be addicting, because getting a little sippy of life force is nothing compared to the pleasure of completely consuming a soul.

I started my idea of vampire!Wild with a singular image in my head: Wild's face and arms smeared with bluish fluids, sucking on a broken hose yanked from the undercarriage of an upturned guardian.

The thing is, most every guardian in the game has been infected by Malice. Wild is absolutely the type to investigate new things via biting and ask questions later, and he can successfully eat monster parts (as well as monster essence) without many complications. We've all tried to cook guardian parts into an elixir at least once. But I can't help wondering if it's like the difference between mineral iron and organic iron- chewing on metal won't give a human any nutrition, but we can get the iron we need from meat. Maybe Wild's augmentations can filter out the consequences of eating raw hinox liver, but they might be vulnerable to Malice that has adapted to the shape of a magitech electronic virus.

I love the idea of his normal instincts (food heals) getting influenced by magitech input (cannibalize broken tech), and it's not like he has commendable impulse control that would second-guess the urge to drink robot coolant. Stuck in the middle of Hyrule Field with the last of his kebabs gone, why not try it?

Have you ever been so thirsty that you go for a sip and then start chugging because the water feels much better going down than you expected, jaws practically latching onto it like a stubborn wolf?

I keep thinking about it. I keep thinking about the idea that if Wild feeds on guardians to fuel his own internal systems, he's insanely vulnerable. And if he goes too far, is the infection something that would burn out? Would he just have his own private Blood Moon event, ripping through the countryside until he finally blacked out, or would the virus puppet him past the point of consciousness? I don't think the Sheikah really understood the concept of firewalls or antiviruses. Why would they need any?

Four, by contrast, is less vulnerable to any kind of corruption (barring, perhaps, dark magic) but much more vulnerable to the pitfalls of being a well-adjusted civilized human faced with the urge to devour life energy. Starving even though he's eaten a three course meal. Thirsty even though he's drank an entire bucket, or tried to. The human body doesn't have the signals necessary to covey your sword is starved for energy, wires are bound to cross in confusing and ugly ways. Headaches, weird cramps, until finally the sword he reshaped starts altering him in turn.

Hylians eat with their mouths and kill with their hands. A sword eats and kills with the same organ, but the base instinct of magic could get the point across well enough. If he won't eat by stabbing, maybe he'll eat if the magic makes his Hylian body more effective- steel claws and steel fangs, the better to gut monsters with. Or people. It's not like the sword has preferences, it just has hunger. Symbiosis is a two way street: Four made the sword, infused it, empowered it. The sword, in turn, broke him down and remade him. They're the same creature with the same needs, now. He just needs to realize it before the hunger gets out of control.

The thing is, he's used to fighting dark magic. Depending on your take, and if you utilize the manga, he could find a lot of comfort in the presence of dark magic. If they suspect they're becoming some kind of demon, or infected with some demon urge, Shadow would be their first thought. If they were to confide in anyone about dark urges, who better than the demon who asked them to indulge those in the first place? They miss him. He'd comfort them. He'd soothe whatever burning need this is.

If you don't want to use the manga, dark magic is still a comfort in that it's a preferred target, uncomplicated and simple. You don't have to worry about the morality of attacking a creature made of shadow. It's fine. It's quite possibly the only fine target to have.

Whenever I think about the possibility of vampire!Four losing control, I come down to two options. He's an extremely controlled person by necessity, considering the state of his brain. He thinks twice about literally everything he does. It would take quite a lot of pressure for him to drop that control, past the point of manageable and straight into "you cannot afford to be afraid to injure him, because he's Ruthless and Not Listening". With Wild, preferred prey would be Sheikah tech followed up by whatever the Malice wants dead. With Four?

He's going to find the nearest source of dark magic and bite the fuck out of it, either because Shadow is safety Shadow can fix this, or it's okay to rip and tear a thing this dark, I can let go and be a monster to a thing like this.

In other words, Twilight is in danger. Dark is also in danger, he's just not typically close enough to bite.

I'll come back to this at some point, but I wanted it out here.

#lu four #lu wild #my writing

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lavend-ler · 2 months

Note

Moxxi? 👀💕

LETS GOOOOO MOXXI NATION!!!!!!!!!

How I feel about this character

oh my god, I LOVE Moxxi so much. having a character who is so confident, so involved in the plot and just has the greatest vibe, I adore her. I love how Moxxi is a person who knows what she wants and will get it. I love how the story does give her a backstory but she doesn't dwell on it that much rn bc Moxxi KNOWS she's better now and fuck others who abused and underestimated her. she's hypnotizing on screen, she's so great and also may I add her voice is great. also I'm a bi person myself so lemme just say, she's so so gorgeous

All the people I ship romantically with this character

legit atp who do I NOT ship with Moxxi lmaO but lemme think

Amara - did u see the comic? I won SO HARD, thank u Moxxara nation. I love successful women in love and Amara canonically is super impressed by her. they would match each other so well

Zane - the fact that he becomes such a sad wet sock of a man when she doesn't remember him, I love it. they would match each other's freak

Lilith - my dear AU in which Lilith won the Underdome and started dating Moxxi. again, I think Moxxi would want someone powerful and confident by her side

Ember - great possibility of them getting together and running the casino together <3

Tim - the fandom has soured my feelings regarding them but I still think it's charming and regard them as exes who broke up on good terms

Rhys - can't convince me they didn't have a one night stand

Fiona - Moxxi was her lesbian awakening

Sasha - fuck blands fandom and I think it's so so entertaining. they both deserve this cmon

Zer0 - it's so fcukin funny how Moxxi would try so hard to seduce them but they don't care. but secretly they find her so hot

My non-romantic OTP for this character

aahhh I think she would love to chat and catch up with Hammerlock! he definitely has free drinks at her place but always insists on paying. they love to talk long hours after her shift. honestly that's how I see her relationship with Tim after the breakup too, they like to meet up and just talk. also I like the potential friendship between Moxxi and Athena. I love how in TPS they're so casual but friendly to each other

My unpopular opinion about this character

Her BL3 designs is the best one, it CLEARS

I don't think she's a manipulative mastermind or whatever shit fandom paints her to be. she's a skilled and intelligent woman, not a manipulator. Jack would end up the way he is no matter what guys

the innuendo shtick is pretty boring, I wish they'd focus on other aspects of her character

I hate when fandom insists her last name is "Hodunk". u rly think she after so many marriages would keep a last name of a clan which abused her?

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

actually uno reverse card - what I don't want to happen to Moxxi is that I don't want her to get a permanent relationship. I like the fact that she's a free lady who just does what she wants. she doesn't need another marriage, she deserves to be herself

I wish we could go to Jackpot under her management! I wish we could see how she runs it and what flare does this place have rn

I wish she could apologize to Ellie for her comments regarding her weight. it was so unnecessary and seriously Burch, why the fuck did u put this in the game

#ask #shinakazami1 #borderlands #mad moxxi #I love u Moxxi keep on girlbossing #she's just so so amazing I love thinking abt her. Moxxi :3

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welcometololaland · 1 year

Note

Your turn, babygirl 💖

The scenario: A 24-hr Amazing Race-style challenge which includes booking travel and actually travelling from Tokyo to Kuala Lunpur which is approx 7.5 hours (why those cities? idk, they just popped into my head), with tasks to complete in each city

The prize: Something fabulous.

The players:

1. Nancy Gillian & Hunter Huntington III

2. Alex CD & Nora Holleran

3. TK Strand & Pez Okonojo

4. Zahra Bankston & Owen Strand

5. Henry FCMW & Marjan Marwani

6. Pearce Risher & Grace Ryder

7. Carlos Reyes & Andrea Reyes

8. June Claremont-Diaz & Tommy Vega

Notes: players cannot utilise their personal wealth to assist them, game provided budgets only. Assume there are several flights per day between Tokyo and Kuala Lumpur

Who wins? Who loses? What are their final rankings?

Oh fuck. I got hit with one of my own insane questions!!! Uno reverse has got me!!! Thanks to my beloved Rae and thank you to everyone who has amused me with answers to these I fucking love sending them 💕

The rankings: Tommy and June, Henry and Marjan, Owen and Zahra, Pearce and Grace, AGCD and Nora, Andrea and Carlos, TK and Pez, Nancy and Hunter.

The rationale:

1. Nancy and Hunter

A complete disaster. Nancy is fucking hilarious and very smart, but her sarcasm would go completely over Hunter's head. He would annoy the absolute shit out of her by talking about his personal wealth (which is absolutely worthless in this situation) and bring no practical skills to the table. Nancy would do her best, but she'd quickly find out that the only way she can help this idiot is by stitching him up when he pisses a fellow passenger / member of the airline staff off so significantly that they fight him.

2. AGCD and Nora

2 x very competitive, chaos bisexuals fighting it out. They are a naturally a formidable duo. Alex is very smart, but by his own admission, Nora is even smarter. They definitely have the brains and the physical prowess to take out the top spot but they're both prone to a hyperfixation and my suspicion is they would misread clues and go down a fucking rabbit hole OR forget to eat for days on end and pass out from lack of sustenance (I suspect the latter).

3. TK and Pez

How much fucking fun would these two have? Seriously, I would voluntarily elect to follow them around! Their great strength is that Pez is very well travelled and also super chill, and TK obviously has some pretty handy paramedic skills. I think their downfall is twofold: TK will (without a doubt) get into some kind of accident, and Pez will have no fucking clue how to deal with that except to maybe stick some glitter to him. Secondly, they would both get easily distracted (TK by any and all animals, Pez by anything eclectic or vaguely amusing - which may or may not be TK himself).

4. Z and Owen

If Zahra manages to avoid having an aneurysm from having to deal with Owen's fondness for a date and / or a meaningless side quest, I think they're on the money. Let's be real, Z is fucking scary. There would be an initial power struggle and there's a 87% chance Owen would try to hook up with her (which would be very quickly and viciously shut down), but once Owen accepts defeat, they are a good showing. Zahra is very organised, takes no shit and is very smart. Owen is very competitive and great in any and all stressful situations. Wouldn't count them out.

5. Henry and Marjan

Platonic power couple. Henry would almost immediately relinquish all power and control to Marjan, who would absolutely slay this challenge. She's smart, resourceful and physically capable. Henry is cluey, painfully polite, a fucking prince and...let's be honest he's just very hot. I feel like he could easily schmooze their way into the last two seats on the first flight out of Tokyo, even when the booking clerk initially said the flight was full. Plus, Henry is always seen as the more docile one, but I reckon he'd get a huge kick out of seeing Alex's pouty little face when he beats him. Their only hold back would be Henry getting recognised and being asked for an autograph.

6. Pearce and Grace

God, they're both very smart and capable people, but I just think the initial power struggle would complicate things. Pearce would be too much about reading (and then reciting) the rule book, and Grace would get very frustrated with him when he (initially) refuses to listen to her. They'd definitely work their way around it, but the initial speed bump would cost them.

7. Carlos and Andrea

Look, they'd work perfectly together. We know Andrea can be savage when she needs to be, and Carlos is very intelligent and resourceful. The problem is, he's only left Texas twice, so he's hamstrung by that. Andrea would be a little caught up making sure he eats properly, and when you eat 6 meals a day that's gonna cost you. Plus, Carlos would be acutely aware that TK is likely getting himself into some kind of NDE at any given moment, so that would be weighing heavily on his mind.

8. June and Tommy

The dark horses. They might not have some of the credentials of other players, but that's their strength. Tommy is fantastic at giving directions, June is a superb listener. They (like Andrea and Carlos) have the capabilities of communicating in two languages. Tommy is hyper competitive, June has incredible intuition. To me, they're the ones to watch. Girl power 🙌

#a different kind of character meta #rmd tag #chaos tumblr asks #911 lone star #rwrb #red white and royal blue

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mineae · 7 months

Text

chronicles of an emotionally unavailable mc - p1

one thing I noticed right away with the weekly playtimes is that the claw machine and kitty cards can get pretty repetitive. i like achievement hunting so kitty cards is still interesting for me since I still have a ‘goal’, but it requires brain power and luck… (bless you Xavier for having such a simple play style so I can hoard cards and then combo you to oblivion just before the game ends), but claw machine is more eh.

It’s quick and simple enough that it should be fun every week, even if you’re doing it 3 times per LI, so 9 times total, and if you really don’t want to do it (cough, me), you can just let the LI auto.

I used to at least half-heartedly tap to encourage the LI but sometimes I’d forget while multitasking, but now I’ve given up completely. but I have no incentive to do it now, because rafayel’s annoyed side eye and xaiver’s disappointed/frustrated expressions are lowkey hilarious. Zayne is the only one that gives me trouble because he’s the only one who doesn’t want to play the claw machine either. We play metaphorical tug of war every week. He insists I go first, I refuse. He uno reverses my refusal. I go a round and ask him to switch with me. He refuses. Next round he can’t refuse, so when he asks to switch, I very smugly reject it and watch with schadenfreude as the man uses his evol and still loses the plushie. claw machine is actually pretty great, in that regard

#min plays love and deepspace #adventures of an emotionally unavailable mc #love and deepspace #otome game

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sarrie · 10 months

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hey guess what uno reverse now it's YOUR turn to do the DMC gang for the blorbo meme

YESSSSS! >:) This is also going under a cut because I imagine it's going to be both long and unhinged.

Dante: The Man, The Myth, The Deep Dish

I don't think I could ever be normal about this man. It's been since 2007. That's sixteen years of loving this dumpster fire of a man. I could fix him. He could fix me. Some secret third thing. Do I project on to him because we both had trauma in our childhoods that life didn't give us time to process, so we trudge ahead, pretending we're fine and using jokes and humor to convince everyone else there's nothing wrong? yEAH SO WHAT. Does this also mean I just want to scoop him up and hold him while he cries and mourns the loss of his parents and his brother and acknowledges his fear of his place in the world around him? ALSO YEAH. Also he's so pretty like what the fuck. I thought DMC4 was top tier, but then 5 happened and something in my thirty year old hormones came online and I'm fucking feral for him LOOK AT HIM I want to use him as a chew toy. I want him to use ME as a chew toy. Also we agreed on fandom being wrong because y'all yeah maybe a young 16, 17, 18 year old Dante met someone pretty at a diner or after sneaking into a bar and maybe he was a flirt and chasing folks trying to project some macho persona he was too scared to actually feel. But then there's a demon attack and that pretty thing is dead in an alleyway and Dante has to face the fact that he's one of the few people who could have saved them and he failed. And maybe from then on out it's easier to leave the shop messy because what's the point. Who cares anymore. And if that just works as an excuse to never "go back to his place," so be it.

Vergil: Studied The Blade (tm)

I put I can fix them but I could also make him worse or he could make ME worse. I was never the biggest Vergil fan initially when I picked up DMC3, but as I got older and processed through the games/lore (and read one too many fanfic lol whoops) I really came around to loving him. He's pretty. He's stupid. He's impulsive and makes Every bad decision, despite trying to pretend that he's In Control. I want him to fuck up more. I want him to get a break. I want him to comb through hell and destroy every demon that ever hurt him. I want him to have a nice brunch with Nero and Kyrie. I think in person he would drive me insane. He's so fucking emotionally constipated and like yeah, bro, I don't blame you but can we calm down on the power this and power that and maybe have a power nap??? He has so much actual fucking torturous trauma and I just want him to work it out with Dante so he can feel like he has someone on his side for once!! I'm on your side baby boy let's get you some therapy hey wait no put down the sword don't do anything drasti-- V: "Don't worry, I'll be gentle." Me: reduced to sounds only dogs can hear.

If you had told me I would have loved this sandal-wearing loser as much as I do, I wouldn't have believed you. His voice. His stupid theater kid scrawny napkin boyfriend ass quoting Blake and making innuendo. Be still my heart I guess I DUNNO MAN. V is SUCH a cool character. I love that we took Vergil, who is all demon-side this, demon-side that, and got to play as his atrophied humanity trying to scramble and fix the problem he created. And don't get me started on the separation scene. It was so cool, and sad, to see the absolute fear -- something Vergil would have attempted to school into indifference rather than openly express. I also love that, for the most part, V doesn't feel weak. Frail, maybe, but despite being this pale and crumbling representation of humanity he is still able to fight and kill demons and protect others. There's still a place for him (and humanity, by proxy i guess) in this world. Nero: The protagonist we got, the son we deserved.

I FEEL SO BAD I HAVE SO LITTLE SPACES. Nero!! MY SON!! I was definitely not super sure how I was going to like him since my experience with DMC up until 4 was me pining over Dante 24/7. But then this punk idiot shows up to church wearing headphones and being bored out of his mind and I'm like, oh mood. Same. And he's fun. He's angsty and snarky and like an awkward duckling and then DMC5 happens and he has friends and has joined the DMC business and has carved out a place for himself! And I NEED HIM to have the chance to beat the shit out of Vergil, and then be able to have an actual relationship with his dad and uncle lmao. Also I didn't do a bingo card for these bc spoons but; Kyrie - I'm love her and I need more Kyrie Content. Nico is so fucking cool I will gladly run around picking up demon arms for her whatever you want bestie. Trish and Lady I love so fucking much and they're dating and I will literally not hear anything else.

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rosemariad · 7 months

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Supernatural season 13

I've heard of the widower arc that takes place during the early part of this season but geez

Dean looks so depressed – the desolation, the hopelessness. Poor Dean Bean, lost his angel yet again. You can't help but feel for the poor guy (for now…)

Then the instant 180, uno reverse this man takes in his demeanor. He's so happy Cas is back. AND having a big cowboy adventure! They're spoiling this man after the widower arc. Jack & Sam are not down for it but Dean's been so miserable they shut the fuck up.

Dean swallowing deeply when Cas quotes Tombstone – confirmation they have movie nights together (ALONE??????) if they were alone during these movie nights – they're basically dating w/o clarifying that they are actually dating – and they're coparenting, my goodness! The domestication is real!

We later find out Dean snuck a quick shot of Cas in the little cowboy hat he made him wear for the case. Wow.

But as a side note - I did NOT appreciate how shitty Dean was to Jack. He was basically abusing him verbally like WTF give the kid a damn chance - don’t make death threats to the newborn child that was literally born yesterday like the fuck #jackdefensesquad. Like anything bad that jack actually does, he’ll think back to the moments where Dean was like ‘oh he’s a monster’ ’when you go dark side, I’ll be the one to kill you’ yeah like maybe that’s what pushed him to that point. It’s no surprise Jack chooses to leave. My ass would’ve been gone. Also was Cas made aware of the threats Dean made to Jack???

They’re making it REALLY HARD to like Dean this season. MoC was bad, Demon!Dean too but evil forces were at work. This time he got no excuse — threatening at 16 yr old girl who has no one in her corner. They’re basically forcing her to help them for nothing in return. Unbelievable 🤬 And Sam, wtf? Would it kill you to stand up to your fuckin’ brother!

Anyway - Jack’s power is totally cool though.

Kaia…was killed by an alternate self? Whaaaaaat?

So this was the season they tried for the Wayward Girls? Shame it didn’t work out…like the premise is cool BUT since the main show barely give the women characters the time of day, is it any wonder that a pilot didn’t work? The showrunners only seem good with moments - but no building up of the narrative like the male counterparts AKA main cast. Also - what would be the conflict - give people a reason to keep watching the girls - their storylines seem more or less resolved - Jody has already mourned the loss of her family, its not like she became Batman or something to fight a war against criminality. Claire has also gotten past the loss of her parents (as far as we know but honestly she should’ve been part of the main narrative as her life had been directly affected by Castiel’s actions and we all know why Cas bothers to get up in the morning…anyway), Donna doesn’t seem to have anything going on - she’s divorced but over it, Alex is over her dark past, Patience is just seeming to get a hand of her abilities - like where are the stakes??? Sam and Dean had a whole quest to embark on, then they had to navigate fraternal relationship while fighting monsters all the time, slowly unraveling an overarching narrative that’s taken over their lives. Where’s that for the ladies????

I spoke too soon - Donna’s niece gets kidnapped and Doug is her boyfriend (wow totally forgot about that guy, certainly didn’t think he’d return) and once he gets turned into a vampire but cured of it, he’s done. Before he leaves Donna, he calls her a hero. Honestly, if I ended up having a partner/lover who killed dangerous supernatural creatures, I wouldn’t leave them. I’d stick by them and have them teach me a few things. Oh well. Maybe Donna will run to Jody to have a shoulder to cry on ;) I know y’all JodyxDonna shippers are out there.

Scoobynatural was fucking legendary! I loved watching Scooby doo as a kid, from when they were literal babies, to the OG episodes, to the revamp from the early 2000s, all the movies! (Zombie Island was the best!). It was a genuine delight watching the Winchesters (and Cas) cross paths with Mystery Inc. makes me wish they met Buffy and Ash from Evil Dead. That would’ve been awesome! Watching Dean say scooby dooby doo was total cringe tho :/ I love that Cas shut him down 🤣🤣

That ascot though? He’s wearing it all wrong, its supposed to be stuffed in, like how Fred wears it. And certainly not worn with plaid. SMH…

But now I totally want Supernatural as a fucking cartoon! Just like Scooby Doo - it would’ve been fucking glorious, Dean’s unhinge-able jaw, the kooky facial expressions, the comedic effects, and who knows, it would’ve given the show-runners the artistic freedom to reveal the true form of angels, namely, Castiel’s. Oh well.

Donatello is…dead? I know they said Brain dead but after Amara sucked out his soul and Cas fucked up his brain, isn’t he better off dead? Par for the course for a prophet though, sucks for him.

Funny how Rowena suddenly wants to be the good mom and try to bring her demon son back after CENTURIES of chances. Sure she may not have known what became of Fergus since she left him, but I’m sure it wouldn’t have taken much to find out. She just didn’t want to. Now she’s filled with regret. And Sam’s destined to murder her? And she didn’t take him out? Okay, well then I guess it’s only a matter of time until she dies😒 not this season though, she’s too useful with her witchy powers to be killed off until she serves whatever purpose is convenient 😒

Angels are almost extinct :( I know they’re meant to be seen as controlling jerks but so is Dean XD lol anyway that’s a bummer with devastating consequences cuz if there’s no angels - they said all the souls will fall to Earth and become ghosts - billions in number - yeah. If it were me I would’ve just said the souls disappear but it ain’t my show 🤷🏽‍♀️

Naomi is back and I don’t even care - I’m sorry but I just don’t care about Apocalypse world either, I feel like it’s a grand waste of time. The fact that Charlie and Bobby are there doesn’t even matter cuz it’s not them. It’s not the Charlie and Bobby we got to know before. They’re just counterparts of another world, echoes of the fallen. When Dean says I can’t lose you, dude you literally just met her. And they’re expected to what, abandon the world they were born into? The fuck?

And fuck this show for killing Kevin TWICE!!! Kevin you were too precious for this universe/multiverse, whatever.

ketch is the latest (aside from rowena) of former villains/enemies/antagonist in supernatural that's suddenly we're supposed to be sympathetic towards since they switch sides and help the winchesters for a change but what's the reason??? I feel it's a little out there that Dean especially would let ketch live after what he put his mom through but whatever. since the show runners insisted with this whole apocalypse world crap, Dean would have died without ketch's help 😑

Gabriel has returned…only to die…again…awesome. at least he got to fuck rowena before he passed away 🤣😅

Luci got fucked over hahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahaha

Bobby x Mary, oh man John would be roaring in his grave…if he had one 🤣 [got burned to ashes in season 2], Bobby finna take his whole family, first his sons now his wife ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Luci resurrected someone? And nothing bad happened? Now tht’s a twist. I figured since he’s Satan she’d turn into a demon or something, but i guess not cuz we’re definitely not gonna see her again…

You know since I’ve seen The Boys I can see a resemblance between homelander and the devil, they both blow up in anger very similarly. When jack tells Luci, you’re not my father, he raged in a way that was eerily like Homelander would’ve. Just thought I’d point that out…

Dean lets in Alt-Michael - Oh Lord above its the apocalypse all over again (this was a cool shot though) - meanwhile what’s OG Michael doing? Is he still in the Cage with Adam? Really? You had to bring an extra Michael into this nonsense? Ok 🙄 You know if Luci had possessed Sam too, it would’ve been a wrap!

Jack is powerless…for now? This poor kid was gonna kill himself?! Honey why? Ugh I’m blaming Dean for this. He put the seed in that kid’s head he was nothing but trouble and he was going to sacrifice himself, poor baby!

Cas why would you let Dean go?!?! Too sad to follow him into battle after Dean let Alt-Michael in?

Why can’t Sam get a super powerful Big Bad kill huh? Why is it always Dean? Geez.

So the only good things to happen this season were Scooby Doo and Jack meeting Cas. Ugh, their meetup was soo cute ^_^

Welp only 2 seasons left, the last that’s over 20 episodes. Which means we only have 40 episodes to go til the end…goodie 😅

#supernatural #dean winchester #castiel #sam winchester #mary winchester #jack kline #scoobynatural #rowena macleod #rowena supernatural #ah shit here we go again #apocalypse #supernatural season 13 #bobby singer #charlie bradbury #destiel #deancas #widower arc

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