lickmysneakerss

[winterstarfall]

as if i needed further reasons to hate steven moffat i find a qoute like this to fuel it.

WHAT did this man have against rose and ten. literally why did he hate her so much. actually why did he hate absolutely everything RTD built across 5 series.

[stealingpotatoes]

I am OBSESSED with your Desmond lives AU!! I want Shaun and Rebecca to be able to give Desmond all the hugs, I want Desmond to be able to choose to be an Assassin, to be able to help save the world again. Also, I am very curious about how you would resurrect Desmond, because I’ve had similar thoughts on such an AU, but I currently stick it near the end of Valhalla with the stuff that happens there. If you ever feel like expanding on it, I'd be super excited to see more!!!

first of all, AH THANK YOU!!! Yes those are ALL points that are very important to the Des Lives AU! Second of all, thank you so much for this ask in general!!! I was hoping someone would send an ask like this so I’d get an excuse to talk abt the AU more lmao XD!! I made this AU back in March last year, so there’s no Valhalla stuff in it, and it’s set right after/ during the Odyssey DLCs. 

The long story short for my Desmond Rez (rezmond, if you will) is “shroud of eden, abstergo, and some Isu bullshit”. The long story long, however, is uh- you know what? I’m going to use this opportunity to explain the vague story I worked out last year -- but dw, I WILL get to the full ressurection explanation I thought through. However... I’m gonna have to tell the story in smaller parts because I’m lazy and can’t be bothered to write the whole thing out right now. So rez comes later and not in this post. 

also uh-- before we start: I’m going to apologise for like… everything about the way I wrote this. It’s sort-of half fic, half that-way-your-friends-colloquially-tell-stories-that-you-can’t-keep-up-with. Mainly the latter. If you can make sense of this babbling, well done.

 Anyways, without further ado, welcome to:

POTES TRIES TO EXPLAIN HER DESMOND (SORTA) LIVES AU: PART ONE

On the 21st of December 2012, Desmond Miles dies. 

It’s not for nothing -- his sacrifice saves the entire world from a solar flare -- but he is dead. big ripz. The Assassins, his family, do not manage to recover his body. Abstergo gets it first. The Assassins hold a funeral as best they can. They mourn (all in their own ways), they keep fighting (for his memory), and they try to move on (they can’t). 

On the 21st of December 2012, Desmond Miles died -- so when he shows up in a city in October 2018, almost 6 years later, it’s a bit of a shock for everyone. What’s even more of a shock is the fact he’s glowing like an Isu and has some abilities he DEFINITELY didn’t have when he died.

So Desmond wakes up in the middle of some city in he doesn’t know where (yeah ok i just never really worked out where the secret lab would be), with 1. no idea of how he got there and 2. no idea why his arms are glowing like that. He doesn’t get much time to think about it because then there’re a load of Abstergo goons with guns surrounding him. Des may have no idea what’s happening, but he knows one thing: when u see an Abstergo, it’s on sight. So he’s fighting them -- which is admittedly not fun or easy when you’re in the middle of a road and only have your fists as weapons. It’s not going well and then someone definitely manages to shoot Desmond which is very bad -- but then Des feels some very weird (but not unfamiliar) feeling and when he looks up from the bullet wound, every one of the Abstergos are on the floor???? He doesn’t think to check if they’re dead, just legs it out of there lmao. 

//

Elsewhere, in an Assassin safehouse in an undisclosed location (can you tell I just didn’t think about the geography of anything), Mr Shaun Hastings is chilling on a balcony after a mission well done. Good for him. Then Rebecca Crane (queen ilu) yells “Shaun?” from inside. 

“Rebecca?” 

“Come inside. Now.”

Shaun immediately does so because he assumes it’s important or they’re under threat. “What happened? Have we been compromised?”

Rebecca doesn’t answer. 

“You look like you’ve seen a ghost,” Shaun says, mostly joking and with a little smirk -- though Becs looks spooked. 

“Desmond’s alive.”

Shaun’s not smirking anymore. “What?”

“Desmond’s... he’s alive.”

“What are you talking about? Are you high?” he’s totally about to look at her eyes to see if they’re all dilated and druggy. 

“No Shaun, I mean it!” Becs harshly shoves her tablet into his hands. 

Shaun doesn’t really know what he’s expecting to see when he looks down at the screen. What he’s not really expecting to see is Desmond Miles, who’s been dead for six years, fighting a load of Abstergo people -- while lined in Isu markings (also he’s not wearing a shirt forgot got to mention). ??? But wtf??!?! Desmond’s dead. That’s...

“It’s security camera footage from [the city]... About two hours ago.” Rebecca then swipes through more footage with shaky hands and explains that Des very violently burst out of an Abstergo facility in the city with glowing eyes and light leaking out of him (almost like an Apple of Eden). Then the glowing eyes and shining lights shuts off abruptly and Des is standing in the middle of the road looking very confused at his precursor-ass arms and chest. But Shaun is barely listening to what she’s saying and barely even looking at the screen. 

“Where did you get this?” Shaun asks with a hollow voice, not looking up. 

“The Initiates.” (bc who else)

Shaun looks at it again, then at Rebecca, and he’s mildly aware of the fact he’s slightly tearing up; “That’s fake. That can’t be him. He’s dead, Becs. We both saw the…” They both saw the autopsy footage the ac4 researcher got from Abstergo -- or at least, tried to watch it; they shut it off as soon as Shaun ran to the bathroom to throw up and Rebecca quickly joined him. They spent the rest of that night crying and drinking way too much. 

“He died.” Shaun concludes firmly. 

And so Becs is all like “yeah but what if he didn’t?? We need to find him. We need to investigate this.” There’s a determination in her eyes and Shaun knows he’s not going to be able to convince her to drop this -- not that he would. Desmond might be alive, and there is no way they’re going to leave him again. 

They’re both standing there in pure shock and confusion, not saying anything. 

Rebecca’s comm device lights up and starts buzzing, snapping them out of their general ????-ness. Becs goes to her desk to grab it, glances at the caller id and then shows it to Shaun. It’s William Miles. 

The two of them share a Look. They know what he’s calling about -- what else would it be? There’s a stilted moment of neither of them doing anything before Rebecca finally accepts the call. “William?” 

“How quickly can you and Shaun get to [city]?” William sounds shaken -- probably the same way Rebecca and Shaun are -- which is a very weird way to hear the Mentor of the Brotherhood sound. He’s seen the footage, hasn’t he? 

“In a few hours,” Rebecca replies. 

“Good. You need to get there as soon as possible.” 

Everyone’s silent for a few moments. 

“Is this about Desmond?” Rebecca asks. Dumb question. 

There’s a pause. “You’ll be briefed on the ground.” And then he hangs up before Shaun or Rebecca can yell at him.

This is all moving very fast. Shaun and Rebecca share another look. Guess they’re going to [city].  ???

// 

Fast forward several hours and Rebecca and Shaun are in The City [might just have to make the city london bc it’s the one city i actually know well -- however for plot reasons we’ll see later, a swiss city might be better… moving on!]. They get to an assassin base and meet up with Galina Voronina and 2 local assassins. Idk if you’ve read the comics, but to sum things up quickly, Galina and her team were investigating and then ended Project Phoenix -- so Galina now really wants to find out if the whole Desmond thing has anything to do with that. 

Galina also wants to help Shaun and Rebecca get their friend back. They’re her friends, but equally she just lost one of her teammates to Abstergo (while ending Phoenix like 2 months ago, in the comics) and is uh- idk how to say it but she wants to help Shaun & Becs who have a chance to get their lost teammate back.

What follows is cool gang-gang trying to track down any trace of Desmond. You’d think it wouldn’t be hard to find a person who literally glows, but Desmond’s had centuries of Assassin training and knows how to hide lol.. which is making the Assassins’ job harder lol. 

What’s making it even harder is the Assassins know they have to be quick because they know Abstergo is gonna be looking for Desmond too -- and they have way more resources and stuff. That being said, they’re also currently dealing with the fact one of their building and a decent amount of their guards just got absolutely mullered by weird-glowing-desmond. 

The third issue with their entire thing is that they have no idea what they’re going to find when they find Desmond -- or if he even is Desmond. Is he going to be the man they knew but with weird powers? an Abstergo isu-clone? evil? they don’t know, and so they know they’ve got to be wary with him. 

The Assassin gang spend some time (a couple of days at the very most) trying to track Desmond down. Rebecca is using all the tech she can get her hacker mitts on to find a trace of him and equally throw Abstergo off Des’ trail. 

Soon enough, they get a solid lead -- don’t ask for the specifics, i don’t know them. But they get a lead, and it winds them up in an abandoned apartment building or also abandoned building site or something (a building in the city where there aren’t any people, basically). 

Galina scans the place with Eagle Vision and she’s like “There is something very strange about this place.” (someone?) But she doesn’t see a person-shape anywhere. The 5 of them are hopeful but somewhat on edge. 

They go about searching for any sign of Desmond. Galina’s pretty sure her Eagle Vision is just… Messing Up A Lot lol. Like something’s trying to heck with it. So she’s not quite sure it’s working correctly when a load of red figures appear somewhere below them. 

She becomes a lot more sure when the red figures come into sight and START SHOOTING AT THEM! IT’S ABSTERGO!! CRAP! they found them!!

The assassins get down and a really cool fight scene w them vs the Abstergos in the building/ building site starts playing out. Woo Shaun and Rebecca electro-hidden-blade moments!! The fight splits the squad up and Shaun and Rebecca are away from Galina & the others -- but they dispatch the Abstergo guards near them.

They’re about to radio in that they’re all okay/ check if Galina & co are also good when they hear a slightly-too-loud footstep. They whip around to see an Abstergo guard aiming right at them, too far for either of them to get him before he shoots them. crap crap crap.

They would have been shot -- if someone hadn’t come up behind the Abstergo guard and snapped his neck (ouch). 

The Abstergo drops to the ground, revealing the person who saved them and… Shaun and Rebecca stare in shock. 

They’re both looking at Desmond Miles. 

Desmond Miles, who is very much alive (and wearing a hoodie that is 100% stolen). And… with a load of glowing yellow lines on his face. But it’s Desmond -- it’s Desmond for sure. Holy shit.  

Desmond doesn’t seem so shocked, only relieved to see them. Then his expression turns into serious confusion; 

“What the fuck is happening?”

///

ok sorry leaving it there for now! hope you enjoyed what is here will continue soon

[wreckofawriter]

We'll Leave This All Behind

Pairing: Draco Malfoy x Reader

Word Count: 2.8k

Warnings: mentions blood, kinda angsty (dw; happy ending)

Summary: You were raised the same as Draco you go through the same hell, maybe it wont be so lonely together

A/n: Me: I'm so sick of Harry Potter Me 10secs later: I'm in love with Draco Malfoy again. I got feels and wrote this in 2 hours, totally unplanned. I hope you guys like it! Btw pls request AUs, they are so much fun to write.

Link for AU requests

    You could feel yourself falling apart, it was agonizingly slow like each day a layer of who you were was stripped away. You never quite realized how alone you really were until you got to Hogwarts. You knew people, but you had no friends. Your parents didn’t love you, they loved your accomplishments. When you got to the warmly lit grand hall and looked around at all the smiling faces it made you realize that not everyone felt like you. It made you realize that some people were actually genuinely happy, not smiling for a camera but smiling because they wanted to. Because they felt like it. Knowing that made you hate them that much more. 

    Your first year in Hogwarts was spent alone. You sat alone, you ate alone, you studied alone, you were alone. You didn’t know how to change that and you weren’t quite sure if you wanted to. When you were alone you knew what was going on. You knew what was going to happen, there were no surprises, no skeletons in a closet that you didn’t know about. Your own was filled to the ceiling but you weren’t scared of them anymore. You were taught that if you were scared you would die. 

    You met Draco Malfoy through some ball when you were five years old, you still didn’t smile much, even then. Draco had called you evil and ran from you. You hadn’t been hurt by it, kids did it most of the time. You had made friends with a young girl once but your mother had seen you and locked you in your closet for three days for playing with a muggle. You didn’t try anymore. 

    Draco was dreadfully scared of you as a child. He had heard his mother and father compare their methods of a discipline to your parents to reassure him of their own kindness. The things he heard were done to you were like nothing he had ever heard of before. They were inhuman. 

    When he saw you at Hogwarts he had been sure you would be evil and he was horrified,  not that he would ever admit it. But by his fourth year, he began to see you as less of a demon and more of an ally. He knew what you were going to do as you got older and he knew he would have to do the same no matter how much he tried to push it to the back of mind. 

In fifth-year things got worse for Draco Malfoy. He couldn’t push things away anymore. He was facing them soon and he was scared. So dreadfully scared. That’s when he began to see you as a friend. 

    Draco approached you one night looking unsure, almost fearful of you despite the inches he held over you. You glanced up at him, your back stiff as a bored, “Draco.” 

    You never called him by his last name. He wondered if you knew how much he hated it or if you simply didn’t respect him.

    “Y/n.” He responded. You blinked owlishly at him the sound of rain on the stained glass windows of the small stairwell seemed to echo around you. 

    “Do you have something you would like to speak to me about?” You asked, peering straight at him. But that wasn’t right. You were looking through him. 

    “I don’t know,” Draco answered honestly, his heart thumping from nerves. You were so strange.

    You gave a curt nod, “You’re scared.” your voice was suddenly soft, almost a whisper. 

    Draco wasn’t sure how to respond. He had been wrong you looked not at him, not through him but into him. You could see who he was, he marveled. He supposed it was like looking in a distorted mirror and knowing what looked back didn’t look the same, but it was you. 

    “Aren’t you?” He asked, the stairway seemed to darken.

    “I don’t think so.” You said. “I don’t think I’m scared.”

    Draco wasn’t surprised, he wondered if you felt anything but he knew that was silly, of course, you did. You were just better at hiding it. 

    “You shouldn’t be scared Draco.” You murmured, your eyes had lost the sharpness they held moments before, “You’ll be okay.” 

    You had then shouldered past him and as the sound of your expensive dress shoes echoed off the stone walls he wondered if he would be. 

   

    Draco got into the habit of sitting near you. He insisted on being with you at meals and in classes, he even began to study with you bringing chocolate frogs and expensive candies from America. He was slowly invading your lonely life. 

You were studying in your common room late one night. You didn’t sleep much anymore, the darkness made you uncomfortable and nightmares haunted your young mind. Draco was always up with you, he had twin bags under his eyes which matched your own. 

“Why are you here with me?” You asked suddenly, eyes leaving the textbook in front of you for the first time in an hour. 

Draco looked up at you, “Because I’m terrible at Transfiguration.” 

You shook your head and narrowed your eyes slightly, eyes that always softened when they landed on the blonde, “Why are you always here with me?” 

The boy bit his lip, “Because you’re real.” He answered after a second too long. 

“So are Zabini and Parkinson.” He was the only one you didn’t call by his last name. 

Draco dropped his quill into the ink beside him, his eyes locked with yours, and just like yours did months ago in the stairwell he looked into you. “No, they aren’t. They pretend like everything is alright, like we’re normal. They’re fake.” There was a long pause and the fireplace let out a loud crack that sounded like a whip. “You don’t pretend.” 

You cocked your head a bit, “I thought you liked pretending.” 

“I used to.” He murmured, “But I don’t think I can anymore. I don’t want to be scared and when I pretended everything was okay I got scared when it wasn’t.” 

You made no response, you looked almost like a statue - something a greek carved a thousand years ago, a greek who managed to make stone beautiful. But it wasn’t a greek, and they made beautiful into stone, not the other way around. 

“Do you feel anything?” Draco wondered aloud, almost joking. 

You let out a soft chuckle, “I’m angry Draco.” You smiled, “And sad. And lonely.” you licked your lips and Draco watched that stone around you break, a small crack forming as your eyes went glassy and a heartbreaking smile curved your lips. “But you know all about that.” 

And he did. 

Things got less lonely for the rest of the year. Draco watched as slowly the statue that you were peeled away, you still didn’t smile much but you talked more. You told him about things he sometimes wished he didn’t hear. He told you about his own misfortunes, about how his father had built a dungeon under his house and how he was getting a tattoo over the summer. You didn’t pity him as he was sure many would have. Instead, you nodded, you understood him, you understood what he was doing and why he was doing it. You were doing the same after all. 

Summer was dreadful. You wrote letters to each other but it wasn’t enough. You found yourself needing Draco the way you had never needed anyone before. You had forgotten what it was like to be so utterly alone and you were no longer numb to the feeling. 

When you came back to school Dumbledore pulled you both aside, calling the two of you into his office one evening. When you entered the room he wore a grim smile, one so fake you would practically smell its plastic. 

“Hello y/n, Draco.” He spoke motioning for you to sit in front of his massive desk on two matching wooden chairs. You did as told folding your robes beneath you as Draco tucked the books he was holding for you on his lap. 

“Yes, professor?” You asked, you didn’t smile like he thought you might, you didn’t pretend even now. 

“I’m sure you have a sense of why I called you up here.” He responded, his smile dropped and replaced with a much more real frown. 

“I could take a guess.” You responded, Draco still didn’t speak. 

The headmaster turned his gaze to focus solely on you, his eyes were trying to pick you apart and when he glanced away Draco realized he had failed

“I know you two are in danger.” The man said, “I am not oblivious to what goes on at your homes. And while I am sure I could never fully understand what you’re going through I wish to help.” His voice was soft, “You know as well as I that dark forces are trying to infiltrate this castle at this very moment and I need you both to remember, their greatest weapon is no spell at all but you, children.” 

Draco could feel the elderly man’s eyes move to him and he tipped his chin to meet them hoping his gaze was as blank as yours. 

You waited a few more moments before speaking, “You’re right professor.” You said and Draco’s eyes widened, “You could never understand what we go through.” Your words were bitter, “And we are their greatest weapon.” 

Dumbledore looked defeated as he looked over his half-moon spectacles at you, he seemed to age ten years before your eyes as you sat with your legs folded, gaze unbreaking. 

“Do you have anything else to say or could we get back to our common room?” Draco swore the man almost flinched as you stood.

“You are free to go.” He mumbled and Draco stood to follow you, he was glad he hadn’t had to say a word. He wasn’t sure what he might have done. 

You broke down that night. Tears poured from your eyes as you struggled to catch your breath. Draco was stunned when you let out the first sob, the common room was empty and it bounced off the silent stone walls. Your statue had finally crumbled to dust. Draco pulled you into him as you fought against his hold for a moment before leaning into his warmth. You stayed there for a while, tears wetting his shirt as you burred your head in his neck. When you pulled away your eyes were rimmed in red and swollen, your cheeks were blotchy and shining in the dim light. 

“I need to get out of here Draco.” You whimpered to him, “I can’t kill someone, I can’t go back to my parents, I can’t face them.” 

There was a pregnant silence, Draco could feel his heart pounding in his chest as he raised a hand to your cheek tucking a loose string of hair behind your ear and using his thumb to wipe away a stray tear. 

“Let’s run away.” He offered, “From all of this, we could go together into the muggle world, maybe to Canada or America.” 

You bit your lip so hard your teeth broke the skin, “We can’t.” choked back another cry, “We can’t Draco, I have to go through with this. We have to go through with this.” 

“Why?” The Slytherin asked, “Why do we have to? We don’t owe anyone anything.” 

Your gaze stiffened, “I do. I made promises I can’t break.” 

Draco felt his momentary hope crumble, your gaze softened again, your hands wrapping around his neck as you pulled him towards you until your foreheads were resting against each other. 

“I’m sorry Draco.” You whispered, “I’m so sorry.’ Your breath was hot on his face, your deep eyes peering into him through glass panes. 

“Don’t be sorry.” He murmured his chin tilting upwards to capture your lips on his own. Your kiss was desperate, hungry. You felt his teeth graze your bottom lip as your bodies were pressed closer together by his grip on your waist. Your hands moved to his hair as you tumbled over, your back pressed into the leather couch, your legs wrapping around him. Draco’s lips wandered up to your cheeks where he left open-mouthed kisses which tasted bitter and salty, they trailed down to your neck where he bit lightly before finding your own again. He sucked your bottom lip between his teeth tasting the blood there before he plunged his tongue into your mouth. 

When you finally pulled apart you were panting lightly, “We’ll leave when all this is over.” spoke between breaths. “We’ll leave this all behind.” 

You choked back tears as you held your wand to your headmaster’s neck. 

“I understand why you are doing this.” The man sighed, he wasn’t even putting up a fight. That made it so much worse. 

“No, you don’t!” You sobbed, “You could never understand what it’s like. Never.” 

Draco stood a few feet from you. His eyes were glassy, his own wand raised. 

“That’s right y/n.” Bellatrix laughed, “This stupid old man could never know what it’s like for you, He could never help you.” She took a few steps toward you, her teeth were barred in a snarl, “Now kill him.” 

You felt your throat close up, your eyes so thick with tears you could barely see, “I’m sorry.” You whimpered quietly, “I’m so sorry, I have to, if I don’t kill you he’ll kill me, I’m sorry.” 

“Now y/n!” Bellatrix bellowed “Now!” 

Your voice was raw and broken as you whipped your wand at the man, “Avada Kedavra!” green flashed through your blurry world and you stumbled backward not wanting to watch as he tumbled off the tower. 

Draco snatched you by the shoulders, pulling him into his embrace as his aunt cackled. “It’s gonna be okay y/n/n, everything is going to be okay.” His sentence broke and you could feel his body shake, “We’re gonna leave soon. We’ll leave this all behind.” 

You stood hand and hand, your palm had pebbles buried inside a layer of skin, your cheek burned from a cut which you could feel dripping blood off your chin. You stared across the ruins of what used to be your school at your classmates. You felt your mother beside you and your father behind you. Draco squeezed your hand and they disappeared. His whisper echoed in your mind. You would leave this soon. You would leave this all behind. 

A shout broke you from your trance, you watched as Harry Potter rolled from Hagrid’s arms and felt Draco drop your hand. 

“Potter!” He shouted and he broke out running towards him, you took after him as he threw his wand at the boy and a barrage of spells were shot at you. 

“Protego!” You shouted shielding you and Draco as red and green sparks danced around you. Suddenly your arm was snatched and you turned to meet your mother’s gaze but before any words could be spoken she was hit by a blue light and scent hurdling backward. You turned to look at Hermione Granger who had her wand held up. You nodded at the girl in a silent thank you before turning your attention back to the blonde who suddenly tackled you to the ground. Something whizzed by your cheek and you hit the ground with a thump. 

Draco pulled you to your feet and you both sprinted for the castle gates. Your legs caught just short of the entrance and you tumbled downwards dropping Draco’s hand only be hulled back up and thrown backward. You heard a shout and turned as a death eater snatched Draco and slammed him onto the ground. 

“Avada Kedavra!” You shouted and the man flew backward into a limp pile. You snatched Dracos robes pulling him upwards and into the castle. 

You tumbled onto him, gasping for breath as your heart sped in your chest. “Draco?” You asked quietly, shouts seeming so far away now.

His eyes fluttered open, his neck had a wide scratch down the side, his face was covered in soot and dust, rubble had sliced open his pale skin just below his left eye. You sobbed tears stinging your cut and mixing with blood before dripping off your nose and onto his cheek.

“I’m okay.” He mumbled, “I’m okay, please don’t cry.” 

You pressed your forehead into his chest still sobbing as you fisted his singed shirt.

“Y/n.” His voice brought you back up to his eyes, “I love you.” 

“I love you too.” You whimpered, leaning down to meet his lips. They were chapped and rough, your own were split and all you could taste was blood and salt but that was okay. It was okay because you would be gone. You could leave soon. You could leave this all behind. 

Taglist:

@accio-rogers

@roslea

@k3nz-doodl3

@theseuscmander

@sleepingalaska

Masterlist

[dolphin-enthusiast]

Hey bro, I hope you're doing well🥺💖 if your hcs are open, could you do hcs with bucci gang and a s/o getting catcalled/street harassed (only if this is not a trigger for you obviously)? I am upset 🙂🙂🙂...ANYWAy I love you sOoo much Morgane

This is extremely late my apologies but dw I don’t mind writing for sensitive topics such as this one!!! Behavior like this absolutely enrages me and you have all the rights to be upset because it’s fuckin vile. It goes without saying but tw harassment yadda yadda.

Bruno:

- He’s usually freakishly good at masking his true feelings and overall keeping his calm under pressure, but if he were to actually witness you getting catcalled he’s going to go lowkey sicko mode. His motherly/protective instincts kick in and he’s instantly death glaring the person who dared wrong you like that right on his weary watch. Honestly he’d feel like throwing a fit even if it didn’t happen before his very eyes. No, he’d be EVEN more enraged if you’d just come home one day and tell him that since he wasn’t there to intervene.

- At this point he doesn’t even have to do much, all that it takes is for Bruno to shoot said person a quick murderous glare then tell them to beat it and they’ll instantly fuck off not even 2 seconds later. After they are out of scene, he flips back to his usual calm and polite self (the d u a l i t y of man) as he proceeds to check up on you by asking if that asshole’s words managed to get to you. Hell, this man is going to be comforting you for hours and wouldn’t let go of you unless you were absolutely certain you were feeling at least just a little better.

- No matter your response, Bruno is going to pull you into his arms and firmly let you know that he’ll never let anyone hurt you. As long as he lives and he’s by your side he’s going to fight whoever dares to bother you, you have his absolute word for it. Normally he’d at first try solving the issue through diplomatic means but there’s just something about catcalling that utterly enrages him and makes him lose control for a few seconds, let alone if it’s his partner we’re talking about. Tl;dr: dont fucking make the mistake of wronging his s/o, he’ll fucking end you.

Giorno:

- Just like Bruno, but 3 times more menacing if that’s even possible. If Bruno managed to hold himself back just a bit and didn’t let his anger COMPLETELY consume him in that moment, our dear aries right here is quite the opposite. Sure it’s not like he’s going to throw said person into a death loop of despair (although that’s the first thing that would cross his mind), but in that second Gio wouldn’t really be able to mask his emotions like he usually does.

- If it happened before his eyes, that person is as good as dead. He merely steps in between you two, hooks an arm around your waist and “kindly” asks said person to repeat themselves since he’s not sure whether he heard them correctly or not the first time. At this point the person in question would already be getting lowkey uneasy since Gio’s aura and overall presence would be goddamn menacing, and so they’d be beating it in due time after he throws them a cold glare and tells them to never speak to you in this way ever again.

- Akin to Bruno, he’d revert back to his usual calm self right after that asshole leaves then ever so gently he’d check up on you and tell you that you should ignore their dirty, meaningless words and that he’ll be there to protect you always. That day Gio would try his best at keeping you preoccupied and cheering you up since he wouldn’t want you to think of this experience again. He’d put on an unbothered mask for you but deep down he’d still be fuming at the thought of another person just...insulting someone like that. Not only a random someone, but HIS beloved.

Abbacchio:

- Straight up shoves his fist in front of their face, I ain’t even joking. The second he hears them whistling and saying some dumb dirty shit he’s instantly walking over to them whilst seeing fucking red and asking if they have a problem with HIS partner. As said person would desperately try explaining themselves, Abbacchio would merely scowl then threaten to beat the fuck out of them if they don’t fuck outta here in the next 3 seconds.

- He’d be highkey scary threatening that person like that but would then try calming himself down in order to be able to actually think rationally again and check up on you. By the time he’d walk over you and grab your shoulders whilst asking if you’re alright, poor Abba would still be breathing heavily, his cheeks tinted red from the previous intense anger episode. He’d immediately escort you away from the place where the harassment happened as he’d keep reassuring you that you’re safe now with him here.

- That day Abba would keep replaying that episode inside his head over and over because he simply cannot understand how someone could just speak to a stranger in such a horrible way, and the thought of you getting insulted like that is enough to send him into a fit of anger, let alone if you were actually touched by said person. He’s absolutely ready to square up for you 25/8 and, although he’s not the best with words, he’s going to make sure that you’re feeling better and would keep cuddling and comforting you for as long as you need in an attempt to make you forget about the incident.

Mista:

- Makes a damn scene and rightfully so. He’s already a very touchy guy even in public, so the fact that the person in question clearly saw the both of you together and STILL decided to hit on you absolutely enrages him. Hell, even if you were alone what do they think gives them the right to talk to someone else like that??? Mista cannot wrap his head around it and at this point he doesn’t even try to anymore, he’s full on f u m i n g. He already took on some fuckers that were harassing a poor woman in the past and will gladly do it again for his partner.

- Whether he was there when it happened or not, you bet your ass that Mista is going to go on a rant and insult that person’s entire bloodline, mostly using italian curse words of course. He’d hate himself for not being there to properly protect you if it happened when you were alone, but if we’re talking about him actually WITNESSING that scene then it’s game fucking o v e r. Mista would just go like “O I” then waltz towards that rude ass with his fist clenched and brows tightly knitted together in sheer anger. He’d be screaming his ass off at that person telling them to never get near you again, calling them out on their bs right in front of everyone else on the damn street.

- He wouldn’t be afraid to legit fight them whilst everyone was watching either so you’d most likely have to drag his ass away from there or else he’d end up fucking killing them or something. Mista would need some time to come down from his rage episode but when he does he’s going to be apologizing over and over for his outburst, quite literally crushing you into his arms afterwards and trying not to fucking cry whilst telling you how much he loves you and how he’s going to beat up anyone else that tries wronging you like that again. Expect him to be EVEN more clingy than usual for the next few hours as well since he can get v e r y protective over you.

Fugo:

- As expected, probably the one that erupts the worst. If you thought Mista and Abbacchio threw a scene honey you ain’t seen s h i t. The second he hears that person call out to you in an insulting way he’s violently whipping his head around towards them, his jaw clenched and hands trembling with anger. In that second said person knows they F U C K E D U P because Fugo starts screaming his ass off and calling them all sorts of colorful insults.

- Just like in Mista’s case you’d have to hold him down or else he can and WILL kill them. Fugo has absolutely 0 patience and regard for people that do this also because of personal reasons, so it would almost be ptsd inducing for the poor man. Not only would he be utterly enraged with such behavior directed at a total stranger (who also happened to be his beloved mind you), but it would also remind him of some past experiences he wished he could forget. 

- Afterwards Fugo will be unusually clingy and significantly more open with his feelings, telling you over and over how he’ll stop at nothing to protect you and constantly expressing his love for you through gentle touches and soft words. He’s normally extremely shy when it comes to showing affection, but after this he’d feel an overwhelming need to be there for you and comfort you through your distress, swearing that he’ll protect you no matter what and that you shouldn’t care for such heinous comments coming from an uneducated rude ass.

Narancia:

- At first is flabbergasted and tries to process what that person just said. Did he hear that right?? Are they really serious?? Did they really just dare to mess with Y O U???? That’s it, Narancia is angrily stomping towards the scene, throwing an arm around your shoulders whilst straight up bullying your harasser for their disgusting behavior. Now if said person tries mocking him that would be their last mistake because Narancia can and WILL throw goddamn fists regardless of who’s watching.

- He’ll tell off anyone that bothered you then smother you in hugs and spoil you with anything you wanted in an attempt to cheer you up. He’s also a surprisingly good listener so you can pretty much pour your heart out at him for he will sit through it all then proceed to comfort and hug you plenty. He may be smol but Narancia has no fear of fighting for his close ones, so he’ll let you know that whenever someone else starts bs you should immediately call him.

- He doesn’t like dwelling in the negative feelings and will instruct you on doing the same. Basically, he’ll try getting your mind off of things to the best of his abilities and is going to constantly be encouraging and reassuring you. Narancia is pretty much a walking serotonin machine who will be your emotional support human as well as your “bodyguard” because he really likes to pride himself in protecting and keeping you safe.

[hexenmeisterer]

Comparing “The Ladies’ Man” to “A Likely Story”

Some collaborative due South meta 

Here’s what happens when two friends separated by lots of geography watch due South together over Skype, read ALL of truepenny’s meta, and then start jamming in a google doc about two episodes-- which differ drastically in tone but share a bunch of themes! (crossposted here on DW, which is a better place to comment if you wanna have an actual back-and-forth discussion.)

H is me and T is the inimitable @touchmycoat.

H: In “A Likely Story,” Ray is trapped in his ideas about his love interest (what’s her name again?). He cannot for the life of him tell when she’s lying, he can’t see her true motivations, he can’t know her. He’s just using her as a blank screen to project his internal conflicts onto. This is, as truepenny points out, a theme that due South returns to almost every single time it explores romance. How many episodes philosophize on the possibility of “love at first sight?” Off the top of my head, I’ve got “You Must Remember This,” “Victoria’s Secret,” “An Invitation To Romance,” and “Say Amen”…

As Huey and Dewey say in “Say Amen,”

“Well, you know the thing is, you can't really love someone until you know them.”  “Sure you can. The hard thing is to love them after you know them.”

T: The love interest’s name is Luann— Frannie’s actually the first person to name her, well into the episode. Luann’s not introduced to us, to Ray, to Fraser by name, relation, or even profession. We’re just left to assume she has a caretaking role for Mrs. Tucci based on her age and actions. The dialogue even (intentionally?) suffers from this unknowing; Ray says, “Look Fraser, I am very sorry for Mrs. Tucci’s loss, and I will make every effort to find the killer of her husband, but the fact remains she is a very beautiful woman.” The pronoun confusion just further highlights how much it doesn’t matter who Luann is, just that she is “a beautiful woman.” This issue goes from highlight to glaring headlights when the cut from EXT. CAR, EVENING to IN. STATION, DAY is done by their conversation just rolling over, and guess what they’re talking about? Well, Ray’s talking about sex, and how little of it they’re both getting.

H: The Lou Skagnetti story and Sword of Desire, which both show up multiple times throughout the episode, explore the (gendered) stories people build around romance. The ending scene specifically juxtaposes these two stories about love by putting their endings right next to each other. Ray and Luann have retreated from each other after a failed attempt at connection, and they both soothe their disappointment by turning to fantastical love stories.

This one, told between two men, out in the “wilderness” by a campfire:

“Lou Skagnetti looked at the princess who sat across the stone table in the stone cabin high atop Sulfur Mountain, and the princess smiled at him. And for a brief second, Lou Skagnetti could hear his own inner bell ring as though it were rung by a thousand angels. And he took his hand and he placed it over his heart, and Lou Skagnetti vowed that never again would he kill and eat another princess as long as he lived. . . unless, of course, she were covered in choke cherries and brown lichen and a sprinkling of dust -”

vs. this one, read in a comfortable bedroom (with the most floral bedspread ever invented), a story that one woman read aloud to another to help her sleep:

“Gabriella's chest heaved at the sight of him. His boldness made her feel like a true princess. As he came near her, she could feel the trembling of the deep inside her most secret place…”

Notice how they could almost be the same story told from different perspectives.

Fraser’s story, though, does not offer the same easy comfort Luann’s does. His story is a funny distraction, but it's also a dark mirror held up to romance. Fraser's status as an outsider means he knows different stories than Ray and Luann. This story shows the blood and guts of love. In the context of the episode, it gestures at how the theater of "love" often leads people to act in deeply un-loving ways towards each other; how it can get in the way of people even knowing each other. (“That's one dark story.” “Yes. It is.”)

Fraser has seen Ray use his position as a police officer to stalk his ex and now he’s seen him try to date a suspect. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that he’s telling Ray a story where the protagonist has been “eating princesses.” The story’s not just an accusation, though; it’s a hopeful story, a humorous story; it’s told playfully and as an act of care, and it points to the possibility of true love in the future that is not based on violence.

T: I almost wish the show had the continuity to also let this moment comment explicitly on what Fraser couldn't get from Victoria. His love for her is so mired in guilt that he thinks himself deserving of all the violences she visits on his person. It's like, Ray is pre-Lou Skagnetti and Fraser is post-Lou Skagnetti; Ray needs to stop his violence and Fraser needs to pay for his violence. The same problem of failed recognition occurs on both sides of the story.

H: I love your point about Fraser being like Ray but somewhere further along in the accountability process.

In the "love-at-first-sight vs. true knowledge of a person" saga that is this show, there is one unexpected pair of people who know and love each other deeply after very little time spent together: Beth Botrelle and Ray Kowalski. They can see right through each other. They understand each other’s motivations— so not only can they tell when the other’s lying, but they can tell you exactly why. They are bound together through shared experience. And while their story is obviously not romantic, it is shockingly loving. Beth is willing to falsely confess to a murder she is unjustly accused of just to make Ray feel better, just to give him a real shot at moving on with his life after she dies. Ray is obviously willing to risk his job and his life to exonerate her, but he is also uniquely willing to admit his mistakes to her; he tells the truth exactly as it happened, and therefore sacrifices the easy self-justifications that have kept him functioning as a cop and as a person all these years.

(and, side note— how interesting is it that Beth of all people calls Ray “queer,” and his response is to laugh and nod?)

Beth does need to be saved from a death sentence, but she is emphatically not a damsel in distress (or a "princess"). She needs to save Ray as much as he needs to save her. Both of them know that their freedom is bound up in the other's.

T: So maybe in some ways this is Ray's post-Lou Skagnetti (I'm laughing as I write these words but bear with me). This is his Victoria, but antithetically; this is where he pays for the violence. Victoria was guilty and Fraser arrested her, Beth was innocent and Ray arrested her—but they both know, to some extent, that the arrests seemed immoral (Fraser in particular, where if they did actually sleep together, he’s fully abused his power as an officer of the law). Where Victoria wanted to destroy Fraser for it, Beth wanted to save Ray from it (she sought to alleviate his conscience by telling him she was guilty). But both Fraser and Ray had to be willing to destroy themselves and the roles they occupied for Victoria and Beth. The Fraser who is whole and the Victoria who seeks his destruction cannot coexist. And, to continue your reading of "Ladies' Man" as the keystone episode where Ray just really should not be a cop anymore, the Ray who is a cop and the Beth who is innocent/alive cannot coexist. There's something very interesting about these relationships between men and women that fail due to one or both of their placement in some kind of institution, because of one or both of their duties/supposed loyalties. Fraser's commitment to duty catalyzes the break between him and Victoria. Ray's abuse of his authority is no fucking good for Stella or Luann, and even when he succumbs to the ease of police authority he fucks over Beth.

Tying Ray and Fraser and Victoria back to “A Likely Story,” everybody, particularly Ray, speaks in projections; throughout the episode, Fraser is the mirror while Ray is the puppy, as in Ray doesn’t know the other puppy isn’t real, so he’s snarling and barking at the mirror, who is merely the medium through which the reflection is transposed.

H: “FRASER IS THE MIRROR AND RAY IS THE PUPPY” WHAT THE FUCK I LOVE THIS IMAGE. IT IS ABSURD AND TRUE. YOU ARE BRILLIANT. Please, expand upon this point.

T: This one particular projection:

Ray: “Let me see if I got this right, Fraser. Luann is a beautiful woman, therefore she must be bad. And since she's a really beautiful woman, that means she's got to be really bad. Is that how it goes inside your brain?”

Of all the projections, Fraser most clearly calls this one out for what it is: “Are you sure it is my brain we are talking about?” Funny, since this is the one projection that fully echoes Fraser’s hangups about Victoria. Vecchio’s line from “Letting Go” seems resonant: “Not every woman with long dark hair tries to kill their lover.” But this is clearly about Ray: his low sense of self-worth makes him look for flaws in women he believes are “beautiful” and out of his league.

H: Yes!! They're both backed into these low-self-esteem corners with regards to romantic relationships: they’re both thinking, "there's something wrong with me." Ray projects that outwards (“what’s wrong with this woman?”), but Fraser does a slightly different thing with it: “if she's into me, she must be operating on an incomplete set of data.” Fraser knows that people think he's attractive, but also thinks that they can't see/know him enough to love him in a real way. I think that's why he was so INTO Victoria-- she knew he did bad things and wanted him anyways! And she, to his mind at the time, was clear-headed about what kind of punishment he deserved for his wrongdoing. There's something more comforting about that than waiting for the other shoe to drop.

T: Both “A Likely Story” and “Ladies’ Man” are about women that Ray Kowalski has wronged, and both end with Ray apologizing—very sincerely—to the women. Fundamentally, I love that as a narrative choice.

H: Yes. Apologize, man. (Apologize and quit your job. I think these two episodes lay out a really compelling case for exactly why Ray does not go back to being a cop post-COTW.)

To summarize:

Ray is a human-shaped projector. He can’t readily name his feelings, but they do warp his perceptions of reality and he does act them out. "I don't know what I want till I see what I do." -Ray Kowalski in The Teeth of the Hydra by Resonant.

This is terrible news for everyone involved when you're a cop!

These episodes both deal with the nature of love-- its relationship to truth and to police work. “A Likely Story” shows the burdensome trappings of heterosexual, romantic love, which in this case serve to obfuscate the truth; “The Ladies’ Man” shows an intense kind of "true love" between a man and a woman that has nothing to do with romance or sex and everything to do with solidarity and truth-telling.

T: And 4, we can absolutely implicate Fraser, at least thematically, in something every step of the way, el oh el.

[clowncroccharms]

Klance Worry Send Help

I asked this of a friend, but I’d also like to hear a lot more opinions on it! I ask, as usual, please do not comment or message saying you agree with the problem, answer negatively saying the problem is happening, add your own fear to the problem, or in any way add to the anxiety that already exists. I ask only for solutions, helpful thoughts, etc.

Alright so here’s the dealio. I’m dying. And I’m dumb and awful at explaining my feelings so here goes nothing.

I am very worried as far as klances emotional scenes and such as compared to everyone else’s, especially allura and lances. I am worried about allurance, but that’s not what I’m worried about right here.

Okay, so, this season allura and lance got a lot of emotional scenes between them. Lance died and Allura brought him back, queue soft looks and emotional shit. Lance gave a speech about how much he cares about allura, then the most emotional of all, a tear filled full body hug after a break up. Then the scene that should have been klance, allura comforting lance over Shiro. Even though lance and allura aren’t together, they still got these emotional scenes.

Now, here’s where I’m worried. Klance hasn’t really gotten anything like this, and they aren’t together either. Sure we have the bonding moment, that kinda cancels out the near death allurance moment in emotional capacity, but it feels like aside from that, klance hasn’t gotten anything emotional, not as emotional as allurance. Sure, we had the black lion talks, hey man, leave the math to Pidge, but idk, were they really emotional? As much as the allurance scenes?

I’m worried that they won’t ever get scenes as emotional as allurance because it’s not straight or some bullshit like that. Sure, they’ve had some kinda emotional scenes, but no crying and comfort (which allurance has had twice in one season). It feels like the writers really are saying klance won’t get that emotional scene shit or emotional bonding that strong because it’s not straight. If klance becomes canon but has non of the big emotional scenes, then what’s the point? It won’t feel right. Even korrasami had the letters, and wheelchair stuff, etc. I’m terrible at explaining myself ugh.

Even korrasami got these emotional scenes (the letters, wheelchair, so many more tbh), yet with klance their emotional scenes haven’t really seemed, idk, super emotional? Besides the bonding moment of course and the hand on the shoulder was a little, but it wasn’t like, confessing love to a gang of mice, or sobbing into the others arms after a loss, etc. I’m fully aware Keith’s been gone since season 4, but a lot of the “semi-emotional” klance scenes happened before then.

I mean part of me thinks, okay allura is more emotionally outright, expressive, and accepting then Keith was (before mama kogane Bc he’s probably better now) and lance already liked her, whereas he probably hasn’t realized feelings for Keith yet, but allura and lance aren’t together, neither are Keith and lance, so I ask why haven’t Keith and lance had these equally emotional scenes as friends as well (real emotional hugs (Shiro and allura), And shit like that). I am worried it’s because it’s lgbt+ and the producers or DW know it’s lgbt+ so they won’t get as in depth with it, show the same level of emotion, or something similar. I want to be positive and hopeful, but I’m stuck on this and it’s really ruining it for me.

It feels as though every other set of characters has gotten emotional scenes (allura and lance, Shiro and Keith) but klance, which is most likely to be canon and is also lgbt+ has gotten so little? Maybe I’m underestimating the scenes they’ve gotten, but they don’t seem to harbor the same amount of emotions between the characters as lance and allura and Keith and Shiro (Not romantic she/th).

Anyways I guess what I’m trying to say here is we’ve seen other pairs get these huge ass emotional scenes that bring them a lot closer, for klance it seems like mildly emotional scenes but not really (besides the bonding moment) or it’s been turned into humor (I CRADLED YOU IN MY ARMS). Idk, it feels cheap I guess, it feels like we won’t ever get any sort of super emotional scene with klance that we’ve gotten with allurance. Even Keith and Shiro hugged it out, lance and allura, Keith and allura (awkward as fuck tho), but klance has gotten nothing. It doesn’t feel like they’re doing this for slowburn, or because it will come later, it feels like we won’t get it at all. Probably because it’s gay. Sorry, this was really long, but I’m really devastated right now and it hurts.

I think a big part of this ties into the worry that klance won’t be explicit. By explicit I don’t mean nsfw explicit, but I mean outright canon, not ambiguous like korrasami, but like it being clear and stated they are together, like any other hetero couple would be. For example, makorra was explicit. They stated their feelings aloud, kissed, held hands, I mean it was literally stated they were a couple. Lotura was explicit, they fucking kissed for gods sake. Korrasami was ambiguous because it wasn’t really affirmed they were a couple until the comics. They could have been seen as good friends. They never stated feelings, or did anything that was explicity a couple thing. I’m worried that because voltron is a “kids show” and run by dreamworks that we will get another case of ambiguity, Perhaps slightly more explicit than korrasami, but not much. It’s a big fear of mine that ties into the rest of this long ass post. I know they have Netflix but dreamworks is still I charge here.

Another point is Jeremy said the klance dynamic would be back in s7... but isn’t that dynamic the one where they have the not super emotional emotional scenes, does that mean they won’t develop further? I guess I’m probably reading too far into this one point here, but it still bothers me so I’ll put it here for your critique.

I know it’s very long, but this is seriously bothering me. I don’t know what to think of it, I’ve explained my feelings as best as I can. Again, please don’t respond with “I totally agree it’s awful”, add to the worry by bringing up more examples, etc. I ask that you help relieve this fear because it’s ruining my otp for me and I’m so saddened because my anxiety ruins everything good like this.

[theyrejustbehindtheveil]

ML Secret Santa

Merry (belated) Christmas @nayawata it is I, your gifter for the @mlsecretsanta with a fic about the OTP

Paris, France | July

She graduates. One day, she is at université, and the next, she is not. The morning after her final exam, she slips downstairs for breakfast and instead finds an envelope.   

Her parents' latest attempt to stop her from being so easily scared is three months in a city she doesn't know with a language she barely speaks. All expenses paid. She leaves in three months. Merde. 

Sydney, Australia | October 

It’s a jarringly young city. Everywhere Mylène looks she expects to see historic architecture and instead sees nothing beyond the nineteenth century. Her auntie chatters good-naturedly from the drivers seat which is on the wrong side of the car. Everything is strange and it feels a little like she can’t breathe and she cant make a sound and she is so so glad when the car stops and she can get inside the house and play her song and feel like she is still at home. 

The first two weeks she only leaves the house with one of her cousins or aunts, too scared to venture outside without some kind of security net. They take her on outings every few days, doing the tourist shtick at what is probably their attempt to make her feel welcome. The multiple trips to the city aren’t too bad, but when they head anywhere else she feels off kilter. The ocean is too big and the countryside is too foreign. The suburbs are too sprawling and quite frankly she doesn’t even know where to start with the birds. 

November

She goes for a walk alone the first week of November. Three pictures of the waterfront reflecting the clear blue sky later and she realises she is lost. Very lost. She isn’t even sure which way is home. She would like to say she was brave enough to find her own way home but the truth is that pedestrian’s hassle her along until she crashes into something large and solid with an eep of surprise. 

The large and solid something responds with a grunt that shocks her into leaping back. And looks up. And up a little more to find the something’s face shuffled into a terrifyingly grumpy glare. She shrieks and cowers a little before the glare retreats into something a little closer to concern.   

She’s fumbling out an apology as best she can manage and trying desperately not to give in to the urge to flee when the man in front of her guides her gently to a bench. “Are you okay?” he asks and she can’t help but suck in a breath at his accent because it is wonderfully, blessedly French. 

“T’es Français?” She hopes he understands what she is trying to say. 

He starts in surprise. “Oui.” She can’t help the wave of relief that sweeps over her and switches to French for a more coherent apology. 

The guy’s name is Ivan and he doesn’t know how to get back to her aunts’ place, but his english is much better than hers and he is brave enough to ask for help and big enough to hide behind when the strangers get to be too much. Mylène thinks she quite likes this arrangement. It takes a full hour to find home, and she is glad for Ivan’s company.

He slips her his phone number moments before she shuts the door. Merde.

Three days pass before she even has the courage to save the string of numbers to her phone. Two more before she sends through a safe, neutral, hi this is mylene :) 

Ivan replies twenty-seven anxious minutes later.  hey mylene good to hear frm u  glad u hadnt lost my no

sorry, she replies 

dw i was jst disappted i might not get to see u again

oh i d like that

me too this wknd?

Deep breath.  yeah i d like that

sat 1pm we can try tht walk again?

yes please

He arrives at the front door at five minutes to the hour. She’s been ready for the past ten minutes, but she still jumps at the sound of the doorbell. 

This second walk is far better than the first, even if there are more people out on the weekend. They find their way to a market near a library and Mylène can’t help but feel a little nervous but Ivan is quietly reassuring. He buys her a little pin for her bandana and his face when she pins it straight to the fabric is something she really wants so see again.

She learns a lot about Ivan that day. He likes heavy metal, hates the heat, tries to be gruff and intimidating but cares too much to pull it off convincingly.   

She tells him about Paris, how scared she is of just about everything because so much of it is just too much a lot of the time, that she likes cats better than dogs, about her dad’s job, and that her deepest desire is to be brave.   

Ivan returns her confidences with the slightly ashamed admission that he is really not a cat person and Mylène giggles at his despondency before rushing to reassure him that she doesn't hold it against him. 

Later, she texts him. the cat thing is mostly because they re quieter  also because of the superhero he was kinda sweet

hte who

chat noir the paris superhero a couple years back in the news a lot both him and his partner total badasses in spandex

oh that superhero

i met him a few times he was at our school on superhero business n stuff he was really kind little dorky

that school that was awlays in the papers was urs?francis dupain or smth i almost went there

francois dupont yeah that was a crazy time scary too wait what dieu we might have been classmates thats so weird i was turned into one of the monsters one time

oh no

there was this mean girl she teased me and i ended up a monster

you could never be a monster mylene

no like an actual monster type creature monstrous from a horror movie pink jelly thing horrificater i scared people and kidnapped them i don t remember what happened much but everyone was really nice to me for a while after

wait the first time that was u in there

yeah that was me

wow working through that must have been hard

i had help chat noir came and talked to me a few times my parents really helped im glad u had that

December

There is no snow for Christmas this year. She gets a second summer instead, of the kind that Paris rarely sees. Ivan texts her every other day to complain about the heat. Her aunt takes her to the beach, and Ivan shows up in a pair of stupidly bright shorts that apparently were a gift from his sister. They make her laugh, and he grins. 

 you re really easy to talk to ivan um thanyk u no really it s really nice i like it

…

sorry if i made it weird i just mean t like we re friends i like talking to you

mylene its fine im sorry i dont take compliments v well it means a lot that u can say that thank u

He hands her a parcel a few days before Christmas. Inside is a pin she recognises from - oh. Its Ivan’s. From his favourite band. “You’re giving me this? Haven’t you had it since you were a teenager?” 

“I… I want you to have it, to remind you that you can be brave.” 

“Zombie Skull Crushers is going to remind me to be brave?” She hates the plaintive note that her voice holds.

“Yeah, doesn’t it just sound brave and badass, just like I know you can be?” 

She hugs him, tight and grateful.

“Thankyou, Ivan,” she chokes out. “It’s the best present anyone’s ever given me.” He hugs her back, gentle and easy as breathing. 

She almost forgets the parcel tucked into her bag but presses it into his hands right before she leaves. “Joyeux Noël, Ivan." 

Her parents fly in for Christmas itself. She goes to meet them at the airport and the moment she sees them both she runs for them. Her dad catches her as she leaps and her mum folds into the both of them and she burrows in between both of them and doesn't leave their side if she can help it from that point on.

Paris, France | January

She leaves for home with her parents. The plane lands and she gets off and everything is so wonderfully familiar but she feels strangely untethered. Her home is still much as it was when she left, and her room is identical save for more dust than normal. 

And she can’t quite work out what is missing until her phone buzzes insistently and she drops her unpacking to fumble for her phone and check the screen. 

They’re all from Ivan, and she realises as she reads through them it’s him she’s missing. He’s worked his way under her skin, going form imposing to reassuring too easily. 

miss u already mylene

Oh, merde 

i rly had a great time with you when i go back home to chatres in abt a month can i see u on the way thru

What?

Two months and it had never come up how close he lived to Paris. To her. And she want’s to see him again and isn't that incredible. Mylène doesnt know what she ever did to deserve such a gift but there’s only one thing she can do 

of course i want to see you too i didn t know you lived so close

His response is almost immediate  yeah crazy huh

A month of of texting back and forth follows. Ivan is beautifully poetic when he tries, and Mylène learns ever more about her new friend. When Ivan returns to France, he knocks on her door when she’s the only one home. 

“Hey,” he says, like. a month of separation hasn't stood between them like anticipation. She stretches her arms around his waist as far as she can and laughs with joy at the tidal wave of affection swamping her chest. He curls his much longer arms carefully, fondly, around her back.   

“I missed you. Please don’t ever stay away that long ever again,” she mutters earnestly into his chest. His arms tighten a fraction, before he shifts one hand to tilt her chin up so he can look her straight in the eye.   

“Never. I promise, Mylène, I won’t ever stay away from you for very long anymore. I don’t think I could.” 

She believes him when he looks at her like that, like he wants to see right through her eyes into her soul and know it intimately. Three days later he asks her on a date. 

She says yes 

They go for a walk.   

She tucks her hand in his and the world feels a little less terrifying when she does.