#i ideally like to get a lil drunk and a lil high most… all… nights but just high is more than enough wooo

[yatiso]

ITS PAY DAY BABEYYYYY i payed my car insurance n phone bill got gas and more gas (cart) im livin la vida loco again

[punkassrichie]

Just Tonight pt 1

A/N: i’ve only written like,, one fic on this blog lol but i really love It so i decided to start up again. also just wanted to say i’m aware that beverie isnt an ideal ship, but i just love it sm 😪😪 it’s got all the angst i need and want >.< but anyway feel free to send me requests? i will do any and every ship bc that’s just how much i love everyone and everything. feedback would be much appreciated! <3 also this is a college au but i wanted the first part to be kind of like a back story, like what went on during their high school years. this fic was inspired by the song Just Tonight by The Pretty Reckless. feel free to give it a listen as well to get a feel of the theme for the fic lol

Warnings: angst, mentions of underage drinking and substance abuse, mentions of underage sex, mentions of SA and abuse, abusive and toxic relationships, cheating, mentions of suicide me projecting just a lil and Bev x Richie. college au. if i missed any lmk. oh aaaaand all of the character are bi LMAO k byeeee

Summary: Beverly and Richie were the cliche best friends. Going to the same high school, joining the same clubs, hanging out at the Aladdin and arcades, applying to the same colleges, telling each other their deepest darkest secrets. Being each other’s firsts. Falling in love. And neither of them knowing about it.

It was the last day of summer, barely going into high school the first time it happened. They were getting drunk and high together, just the two of them. At the time, Bev was with Bill, and Richie was pining after Eddie. Both of them sad because Bev loved Bill with all of her being, but she never felt right with him and Richie loved Eddie, who never made it clear whether he loved him back or not. Eddie was messing with his head a little bit. Not intentionally, he just didn’t have the confidence Richie did. And he wasn’t sure what he wanted.

Richie understood. He wasn’t going to force Eddie to do anything he didn’t wanna do. And if that included Eddie not wanting to be with him then so be it.

But man, did it fucking hurt.

So they both drank themselves sick, neither of them understanding why they were the way they were. They’d talked all hours of the night, drunk laughing and crying, and making dumb jokes until they started talking about things they’d never really touched on before. He’d ask her about her abusive father and she’d ask about his neglectful parents, both of them answering any questions they had.

They started talking about how Richie was still a virgin, and how he really wanted to have sex but not with just anyone. He drunkenly confessed to saving himself for Eddie, but knowing that wouldn’t happen because he knew Eddie wasn’t ready for any kind of relationship with him. It’s like Eddie wanted nothing to do with him.

Bev saw a tear stream down his eye, and she shouldn’t have, she knew she shouldn’t have but she leaned in to kiss him, she told herself it was just to comfort him but one thing led to another and before they knew it, their clothes were off and Richie was tossing her on his bed. With Richie, it felt so wrong but more right than Bill. In Bev’s head, it made sense.

The morning after, Bev had woke up crying. She wasn’t weeping.. it was more like soft sobs. Richie woke up and asked her what was wrong. She didn’t know.

“Is it because of Bill?” Richie asked, his face full of concern.

“No, and that’s the worst part.” She managed to squeak out between sobs. Richie just held her.

Bill was the last thing on her mind, and while she felt bad, she didn’t linger on the thought too much. She knew they wouldn’t last.

No, she just felt wrong. She always felt wrong. She liked it so much that she wanted to do it again and again and it filled her with shame. Guilt. She told herself she’d never be into it, not after her father ruined it for her. But still, she was. And she was disgusted with herself.

She finally told Richie after she couldn’t take her thoughts anymore. Richie assured her that she wasn’t wrong for feeling the way she did. That it was okay, and he had a great time. He was glad she did too.

She looked up at him, not understanding why he was so sweet to her. She didn’t deserve it, she thought.

This time it was Richie that leaned in to kiss her. She was shocked because he wasn’t drunk, and neither was she. She almost forgot that people don’t need to be drunk to have sex. She also forgot that it’s not really recommended. Eventually she melted into it. He was getting handsy and pulled back to let Bev know she can say stop at any moment and he would.

But she didn’t.

And that morning, Richie had went down on someone for the first time in his teen years, and Bev had her first real orgasm.

That’s when she became addicted to it.

-

Few years into high school, and Bev and Richie were still the best of friends. Not making things weird or “official.” Just two best friends that kiss sometimes (and sometimes that do more than kiss) and then act like it didn’t happen the next day. Almost all the time.

Before school started, Bev broke up with Bill. She knew what she wanted now and she wasn’t going to use Bill to get it. She always knew he was a sweetheart, and that he deserved better. She didn’t tell him what happened with Richie, and she made Richie promise he wouldn’t say anything either. Of course he did, but only if she did the same. She also didn’t tell Bill that she was gonna go around, chasing the high that she’d get from Richie, but with other people. He was heartbroken enough, she wanted to spare him at least some of the heartache.

Most of the time she’d just sleep with Richie. At first it was just convenient, and she trusted him, and him only. But then she realized it was because she didn’t feel comfortable with anyone else. She hadn’t realized it but she was falling for the boy. The thought would creep up in her head but she’d make it go away as fast as it appeared.

But all of that changed when Richie and Eddie started officially dating.

She wasn’t jealous, she couldn’t be. She loved him so much and was happy when he finally got to have the boy he pinned over all throughout his childhood. She knew he’d be happy.

She’d be lying if she said she wasn’t feeling a little lonely though, seeing as Eddie would take up all of Richies time. Of course she had the other losers, but it wasn’t the same. They didn’t understand her like he did.

And of course she lied, she was a little jealous that someone took her best friend away. But she had to suppress it because she knew her and Richie would never work.

Richie loved Bev too, but not like he loved Eddie. She knew that. She understood. She also knew she was incapable of loving someone. Or having anyone love her for that matter. She knew he loved Eddie and Eddie only.

She only started to question it when she started to sneak into his house through his bedroom window, sophomore year of course, after yet another rough night with her father. He knew. He understood. He was there. In more ways than one. Some nights he’d just hold her. When she was shaking, when she couldn’t stop crying, and especially when she couldn’t muster the words to tell him what had happened. Other nights she would be beneath him, asking begging him to make her forget. And he would. Because he loved her and wanted to show her. But the thought of love was questionable now because if he could do that to Eddie, what would he do to her? He and Eddie had only been together a few months then.

Eventually she realized what he would do to her.

One night she had biked over to his house, covered in bruises and blood. That night it had been really bad. She went over and climbed up his window, knowing the path up the tree all too well. His window was unlocked, his bed was made and the light was on. Except Richie wasn’t there. She looked over to the bed where there were fresh, clean clothes and a towel underneath them. She knew what it meant.

It was a silent “I can’t do this anymore, but i’m still here for you.” She knew that’s what it meant because for them, words never had to be exchanged. They could speak through gestures and they would just know.

She ended up leaving and finding a quick fuck on tinder. He ended up bruising her up even more. At least he got her a room and stayed with her until they both had to go their separate ways.

-

Sophomore year had ended and summer began. Bev and Richie were more distant than ever. She knew it was bound to happen but she never prepared herself for it. But that didn’t mean she was going to steal him away from the person he loved most.

So she took matters into her own hands. Once she realized she could be in control of her body, she started to get a little out of hand. She started talking to more people at school, trying to figure out if they were into her or not. She debated going on tinder again but there were so many missing person flyers all over town and she didn’t wanna end up on one of them. Not like that anyway.

She felt more comfortable with people she kinda knew. That was until she got involved with one too many football players. When school started up again, they began their “locker room talk” and once a lot of the boys figured out they had sex with the same girl, they’d tell everyone and label her a slut. Bev ended up being one of those girls. It got around school and even back to the cheerleaders which some of them had experimented with Bev that same summer too. Of course, they’d never say anything about it, mostly because they weren’t sure about their sexualities, but that didn’t stop them from bullying her either. Including Greta.

Greta Keene was the main one that ended up torturing Bev. Which was sad really, considering all the nights they had together. It was almost like Bev had found her replacement. She just forgot how cruel people can be.

She was forgetting a lot of things. Once the rumors were spread, some true, most of them not true- she forgot that she had friends she could trust and talk to and tell them what had happened. But she was scared mostly. She knew the losers didn’t believe the rumors anyway but she also knew that a part of them wondered.

So she distanced herself. First time with Richie, second time with the whole club. It wasn’t intentional, but she knew that if she kept up her actions, they’d be concerned. Or they would leave. And you can’t be left unless you leave first, right?

Bev felt like her life was in the gutter. That nothing mattered and nothing was real. She didn’t care anymore. She didn’t care about anything. Not about the rumors at school, not about the people taunting her and calling her a slut every 5 minutes, and not Richie. Definitely not Richie.

She still did what she thought was best for her, and if that meant drugs too, then drugs it was.

She wasn’t into anything hardcore, but she loved downers. She loved the fact that she could take a pill and it would make her numb and forget the events of that day, or the one before, or even after.

She changed. And everyone noticed.

The losers grew concerned. They’d see her walking down the halls, hair looking shaggy with baggy clothes (because anything she wore that was her size would get her called a ‘slut’ much more than it does when she wears clothes that isn’t), big shoes and sometimes when she would things her size, they could see the bruises on her arms, the cuts and scrapes on her knees and elbows, the hand shaped marks on her throat. She’d stretch and while her shirt rode up a little on her waist, you could marks on her hips too.

They were scared for her, and they knew something was up. They loved and care for Beverly so they weren’t going to let her go that easy.

One day, Bev skips out on school and all the losers noticed. It was weird, no matter how much she got bullied or beat (by Greta and her bitch clique and sometimes the Bowers gang), she’d never miss a day.

That’s when they all decided at lunch to skip their last three periods to spend it looking for her. They checked her house first, her dad telling them to fuck off and leave her alone, and if she went out and got herself killed then that was her own damn business. It made their blood boil, it made Richie wanna sock him right there and then. But Bill being Bill, just said thank you and walked off. Made Richie wanna sock him too.

They went to the barrens, quarry, clubhouse, everywhere and she was nowhere to be found. They headed back to school, heads hanging low in defeat, worried about her. They didn’t know what else to do but wait until her dad decided to file a missing person report.

The last bell rang and they all headed home, Bill told the rest of the losers that he would try to come up a plan to see what more they could do to try and find her. He didn’t wanna give up, although the rest of the losers already had.

Richie was walking Eddie home when he cried to him and told him that he shouldn’t have pushed her away the way he did, and that it was all his fault. Eddie just held him, not understanding the relationship the two had. He told him that everything would be okay anyway and that they would find her. Richie just nodded and continued to walk him home.

Eddie offered him to spend the night with him, like he had been doing all year but this time Richie politely declined. He doesn’t know why but something was telling him to go home. Go home and check.

He doesn’t tell Eddie, just tells him he might be coming down with something and that’s enough to make the hypochondriac stay away. For that night at least.

Richie kisses him goodbye and heads on home. And sure enough, there she was. Sitting in his steps, fumbling with something in her hands and mumbling to herself.

He throws his bike to the side and rushes over to her, asking her if she was okay or hurt. She just laughed.

She reeked of alcohol and had a small brown pill bottle in her hands. It was empty.

He kept asking her questions and grew more concerned when he see that her eye had been swollen shut. She was crying, but laughing at any question Richie had.

She was fucked up, it wasn’t hard to tell. Richie didn’t ask anymore questions and just helped her up. She refused but he still managed to get her up. While he helped her up the stairs and into his room, he asked her what she was on. She didn’t respond. He was growing frustrated but settled for asking her when she was sober. He helped her get cleaned up, and saw to her eye when she got out of the shower. He didn’t know much about first aid, but he knew what Eddie taught him.

She stopped crying and she was just silent, her eyes fluttering like she couldn’t keep them open anymore. When he was done, Richie set her down on his bed and held her while she slept. “Love you, Richie.” was the last thing she murmured before falling into a deep sleep.

Of course it hurt him, and of course he blamed himself. She needed him and he dropped her like she meant nothing to him. But it wasn’t like that. Now he wishes they could’ve just talked. If he hasn’t been so caught up with Eddie, maybe they could have.

It was 7pm the next day when she woke up. She seemed very confused, and was surprised when Richie was beside her, talking to Eddie on the phone. He wrapped up the call once he saw that she was awake, he had questions and he was going to get them. He was determined. He hung up and just sighed when he saw the state she was in.

“Bev, you’ve gotta tell me what’s been going on with you.” He says with a soft tone as he sits on his bed, facing her. She can barely look at him, feeling anxious and embarrassed. But she knows she can trust him.

“I-I havent been doing very well lately.” Is all she can manage to say. Then she starts to cry again. And just like he would before, he held her. He calmed her down and waited until she was ready to talk.

And when she was, she confided in him. She told him everything, how she’s been sleeping around to get by, how she found a specific drug that helped her sleep through the nights her dad wouldn’t let her, how some of the rumors at school were true, and how much she missed him and the rest of the losers. She told him that she didn’t wanna leave them the way she did, but she didn’t want them to leave first when they found out about her.

When she was done pouring her heart out, he just looked at her and hugged her. “Don’t ever scare me like that again.” He whispered as he wrapped his arms around her. She was still for a second, but then wrapped her own arms around him.

And they remained in their position for a while. They didn’t talk about their little ‘situation’ they had gotten themselves into, nor did they want to. They hardly ever did. They just sat in silence for comfort.

After that months flew by once again, and things felt normal again. Bev got used to the bullying and harassment from her classmates but she didn’t have to deal with it alone anymore. The losers club made them back off actually, defending Bev until it got them suspended.

They didn’t care though, they wanted to show Bev they actually care about her and that she’s not alone. She learned to appreciate them more than she already did.

They started having more sleepovers than usual so that Bev wouldn’t have to stay at her dad’s so much, and they started calling her and checking up on her.

Richie was always making sure she was okay and telling her to text him whenever she got home or if she was going anywhere and back. Just to keep tabs, making sure she’s alright.

They didn’t sleep together anymore, and neither of them minded. At least that’s what they told themselves. Bev had a few fuck buddies since Richie, one of them being Greta.

“Why the fuck would you still be fucking her?” Richie exclaimed after Bev confessed that she was still fooling around with her despite being harassed by her and her clique.

She just shrugged. She couldn’t tell him it was because she couldn’t fuck him anymore, she didn’t want to pin anything on him. And she couldn’t tell him that she kind of liked the abuse.

Bev had all sorts of kinks that she wasn’t ready to talk about with just anyone, and she knows she could trust Richie, but she still feels a bit embarrassed and ashamed.

Before they knew it was summer again, and that was the first time they were all together again in a long time. Her friends changed and she didn’t even realize it. But so did she. She found comfort in knowing that they would accept her no matter what. And that she would too.

-

Senior year was the best year for the losers, but as well as the worst. They called it their Slack Off year. They had done so much work the years before just to be able to call it that. They’d have 3 classes the whole day and the rest were free periods. Their work really paid off. And it was so much better knowing they were all going to be at the same college. It would be an understatement to say they were excited for next fall. It was until someone new had come into the picture and changed everything.

Her name was Criss. She was new to Derry High. To the town in general.

Beverly swore she loved her. And she swore Criss loved her back. And how they came to be were the losers’ guess but they were happy for her nonetheless. Things with them were great at first. Bev finally seemed happy to have someone by her side at all times, happy to be lovey dovey with, and just happy in general. Beverly was in love to say the least.

The rest of the losers were obviously happy for her, but if anyone had asked Richie what he thought about Criss, he wouldn’t say what he was really thinking. He avoided the question if he could.

But then they started to notice the red flags in Criss, and they weren’t so sure about her. They’d notice when she’d lie about little things, the way she’d grip Bev’s arm when she was mad, the insults she’d scream at Bev whenever they were in a fight, the scenes she’d make when things just wouldn’t go her way. One time Bev showed up at the quarry with a freshly split lip, and they knew it wasn’t her father because she wouldn’t stay at her house anymore. They hated it, and they knew Bev hated it too.

Except Bev didn’t hate it- that much, because Criss wasn’t that bad. She’d ignore the losers when they expressed their concerns for her because she knew who she was deep down. Most importantly she was loved. That feeling alone was enough to make her fly high into the sky. She couldn’t imagine being with anyone else. She only hated the fact that she fell for a person who ended up not being what they said they were. But she convinced herself it was okay, and that she would be able to handle her. She loved her, and if that meant putting up with mild bruises and screaming matches, then so be it. She was just happy that someone loved her.

It wasn’t until Beverly caught her with Greta in her bed, that she knew it was too good to be true. That was the first time she felt her heart shatter. She didn’t go to the losers when she first saw them together, she went on a walk all by herself and not because she felt stupid, (oh but she definitely did) but because if she didn’t, she was convinced she might’ve offed herself. Sometimes she wishes she did. And all the shame, guilt, and embarrassment had returned. She didn’t believe in anything at all anymore.

-

dont be a stranger and lmk what u think <333 part two will be out soon!

[luvdsc]

would you mind doing a description of each member of nct dream? you don’t have to cuz that’s lowkey a lot BUT i figured i’d ask since i’m trying to write something and get their personalities right. i really admire your work!! have a nice day, babes!!!

yes, of course, lovebug 💕 I’ll be rewording the analyses from the asks about my ideal type and adding to them, so it might be a bit familiar! I could’ve written more, but I had to stop because I reached max length for each paragraph 😅 I hope these are helpful to you, and thank you so much for liking my work, honey bee!!! 💛 best of luck with your writing, and I hope you have a good day, too! 🌼 also, I’m on mobile and I’m so sorry for all the scrolling! I’ll add a read more when I get on my laptop ✨ edit: the read more has been added :’)

MARK :: oh, where do i start with mister absolutely fully capable? mark is the definition of adorkable. if you look up that word in the dictionary, you’re gonna see his picture pasted right under it. he’s endearing and awkward, and he tries his best in everything and puts his best foot forward, giving 110% in whatever he does. he’s a hard worker and a good boy. he laughs at that’s what she said jokes, and he’s the type of person to think of a funny joke from three days ago and start laughing at the most inappropriate time, like in the middle of standard testing. he’ll say things he thinks are funny, like “five guys hello guys” or that long sentence about possibilities and immediately look to you with those wide doe eyes, seeking a positive reaction from you and hoping you’ll laugh. he’ll try to wink at you randomly sometimes, but he always fails and just ends up blinking, which will make you laugh and call him cute and have him scrunching up his nose because that’s not what he intended to happen and he’ll be really flustered at the compliment. he’s really sweet, and I think taeil called him the most romantic? however, I feel like having a relationship isn’t a high priority for him right now. he seems to have workaholic tendencies, which could frustrate his s/o. he would need to have someone that understands his work and music is the most important to him, and he might unintentionally neglect checking up with his s/o at times. he’s a little shy and introverted, so it might be hard for him to make a first move if you aren’t friends at first. he’ll write dozens upon dozens of songs about you. that’s the way he’ll express his affection because he’s too shy to in the beginning and music is what he’s good at. there will be lots of late nights with him strumming his guitar and you sitting next to him, reading a book or playing a game on your phone, and he’ll call your name and you look up before he nervously starts to play a new song that he’s written for you. and at the end of the song, he’ll glance up at you really quickly before looking back down at his guitar, and you’re going to have to go over to him and take his face into your hands softly and tell him his song was amazing and you love it as much as you love him. and he’ll smile so big as his glasses slide down his nose before he quickly leans up and presses the softest kiss against your mouth to show you his appreciation before he loses courage to do so. sometimes you steal those round rimmed glasses of his and try them on yourself, and mark has to cover his face and look away and wring his hands and he makes those little oi mark noises because you look so cute and he doesn’t know what to do with himself. on the other hand, mark is also very stubborn. it may not look like that, but if you notice the relationship between him and hyuck, hyuck is always the one giving in at the end. mark will absolutely not do something if he doesn’t want to do it. I do think he will go after something if he wants it, but he will hesitate slightly at first. he follows the rules a bit too much. he doesn’t seem to be the most fun person to party with either unless you get him to drink a beer because he’s a lightweight, but that also means you have to take care of him afterwards. also, he said in an interview that he doesn’t like rollercoasters or fast rides, but he enjoys the cotton candy at amusement parks lol but he did go on those rides in the end, but his head was down the entire time rip. mark gets easily embarrassed. it’s like in that video where they read tweets aloud and mark got super embarrassed when jaehyun read this tweet that gushed about his laugh, and mark just curled up into himself and couldn’t lift his head up and awkwardly laughed. he’s adorkable. please tease him and hype him up in this very same way just to get this cute reaction out of him.

RENJUN :: renjun is the one you can call when you have a body to bury and he’ll show up with the shovel. he’ll call you a stupid idiot, but he’ll still show up to help you. he’s the type that would come over at 3 a.m. if there’s a bug in your apartment and squash it for you after much complaining and telling you that he won’t do it. he’s fiercely loyal and caring. he took care of chenle when chenle wasn’t as proficient with korean and made sure he was doing ok and was always ready to translate for him whenever. he puts up a tough, ready to fight front, but he’s a scaredy cat and if you pretend to be a ghost (read: jisung), he’ll be scared shitless. you can see him get scared and hide behind jeno and hug him so hard when the zombie jumped out in one of those save dream interactive videos. he’s the person you can banter with and he understands dry humor and sarcasm, and I think he’s best for e2l story plot lines because of this lmao but he also fits the best friend role well. he will roast anyone with no mercy with just a few words. he’s artistic. he’s super good at art and has shared several of his beautiful digital drawings before. he’s the person to go to when you want to have long, serious talks at 4 in the morning, and as seen through his radio show, he will try his best to give you advice, even if he may not be experienced enough, but he is trying his hardest to help. if you read some of the advice he gives on his radio show, you can get a better sense of who he is as a person. he’s really insightful and puts a lot of effort into giving the best answer he can. also, he really reminds me of a little brother or someone I want to be best friends with because we can roast people together or talk about paranormal stuff. he just seems really fun to mess around with because he gives funny reactions. he gives off that younger sibling vibe where only your big sister can make fun of you, but once she sees someone else doing it, it’s not ok and she’s gonna go after that person for making her lil bro cry. in a relationship, he wants someone he can trust with his thoughts and interests, such as aliens, and while his s/o may not believe in them, he wants them to genuinely listen to him and not just brush it off. however, he will still roast his s/o into oblivion. it’s how he shows his affection lol. he’ll call you an idiot and cute all in the same sentence. but he’s really a soft and sensitive boy underneath his snappy, sarcastic exterior. he cried when they won first place for the first time. i’m sure he cried when ridin’ reached number one on the charts. he’s attentive and likes affection even though he tries to say he doesn’t. in that one weekly idol dreamie episode, hyuck listed who hated affection, and he wasn’t one of them. he’s a good boy, and underneath all his snarky comments, he wants to be loved and cared for. you can see how he got a lil huffy when jisung chose chenle as his favorite hyung lol he doesn’t express his feelings outwardly as much, but if you’re his s/o, he will quietly adore you in his own way while outwardly being that one snarky couple who banters all the time. he’ll draw pictures of you, secretly have you as his homescreen, or have a secret photo album on his phone of just pictures of you. he’ll complain if you get him a couple item, like a bracelet, but he’ll wear it 24/7 and refuse to give it back to you. he will absolutely lose his shit if he misplaces it. he’ll cook for you if you ask, but he’ll make a big show about fake complaining about it beforehand. I think he’s okay with hand holding and kisses here and there, but he won’t do grand gestures of pda because he thinks those should be more private and between the two of you. he thinks pet names are sappy as heck, and he’ll get terribly embarrassed if you call him one but he’d be like “that’s so gross and corny... but call me that again.” honestly, just tell him ily and his cheeks will turn so red and he’ll bury his face in his hands but he’ll say it back in the quietest voice and he truly does mean it with his whole chest.

JENO :: jeno is someone who fits in so many roles. his character is versatile in a sense. you can make him into a bad boy, the boy next door, your best friend, anybody. his humor is underrated, and he makes funny puns. he’s good at sarcasm and wit, like when he asked jisung if he thought jaemin’s iq was single digits or when the instructor complimented him and said his rap sounded like mark and he was like “oh.... that’s not good.” he worries about being funny. he mentioned losing sleep over it in weekly idol, so please tell him he’s funny and laugh at his jokes ): he really is funny, and i love his humor. jeno is really smart. he managed to rank 4th or something I believe in his school after cram studying the day before. he’s really self-assured and confident in himself, but he doesn’t show off or act cocky, yet you can sense the quiet confidence in him. he’s humble and works hard and deserves more credit than he’s given. he possesses leadership qualities and is a source of strength for other members. i think they said he was one of the cleaner members and when he’s drunk, he cleans LMAO he is into sports and gymming, especially biking. hyuck said that jeno’s bedroom has his and jaemin’s bikes hanging on the walls lol he also is really competitive, but not a sore loser type. jeno doesn’t strike me as the type who needs his s/o around 24/7 and prefers to have hobbies and space separate from his s/o. he’s laid back, but at the same time, still energetic and fun to be around. he’s still weird, but not over the top weird. jeno is insightful and kind, and he has stated that he’s very shy and timid before. doyoung likes him the most because he’s kind and respectful and takes into account other people’s feelings and listens well. he’s a good boy. he’s also really playful and teasing and plays well with others, like jisung jokes around with him all the time. I feel like jisung jokes around with him the most out of all his hyungs aside from chenle because jeno doesn’t get mad. i believe the members say he’s the only one aside from chenle who doesn’t get mad when someone messes up in dance practices. he cries when he gets angry. jeno is also really affectionate. he enjoys cuddling and holding hands and back hugs and whatnot, but he doesn’t overdo it. it takes a long time for him to trust and open up to someone, and you’re a very lucky person if he lets you see this side of him. he won’t force you to do anything you’re uncomfortable with. If something is bothering you, he won’t pry at first if you refuse to talk about it, but I do think he will eventually make you talk if he feels something is terribly wrong or if it’s affecting the relationship. jeno is driven and knows what he wants. he’ll give you space, but if you’re not what he’s looking for or if you don’t put the effort in as well and won’t open up to him, I do think he will move on. he might bottle up his emotions at first, but as the relationship progresses, he’ll be fully open to you and tell you everything. I don’t think he’ll be terribly affected if he’s rejected because he is confident in himself and able to brush it off. he knows his self-worth. oh, and he loves animals. obviously, jeno loves his cats because he has them even when he’s allergic. he’s the type of s/o who, if you mention you’re walking back to your dorm late at night after staying in the art building to finish your painting, he’ll show up with messy hair and his glasses in his sweats with a hoodie thrown on haphazardly and walk you back safely even without you asking. kiss him on his nose at random times just because you love him, and he’ll make that jeno trademark noise of confusion before giving you the prettiest eye smile that makes the moon dim in shame and nuzzling his face into your shoulder shyly. call him jeno darling or jeno love if you want to see the same reaction as before. it’s gonna be a total KO to his heart if you call him that and boop him on the nose with the softest kiss. anyway, jeno is the bestest boy in the entire universe, and give him all your love, please and thank you.

HAECHAN :: hyuck is so fucking talented. he’s good at everything: singing, dancing, rapping, variety shows, you name it. he was born to be an idol. he’s the golden one and excels at everything. he’s an ace, and he knows it. yeah, he’s cocky and brags about everything he does, but he actually has evidence and proof to back it up. plus, no one can stay mad at him for very long because have you seen how cute he is?? he’s a brat, but you still love him anyway. he’s good at sweet talking and getting what he wants. he plays a push and pull game, and you end up falling for him in the end. i know in fics on here, you often see jaemin in the playboy/fuckboy persona, but I think hyuck absolutely exudes this persona. he is able to read the room or a person and knows the exact way to act in order to get the reaction he wants. it’s hyuck’s world, and we’re all just living in it. he can have all of us eating out of the palm of his hand if he desires. i think he truly embodies the traits of a slytherin: ambitious and cunning. it’s every man for himself, and he’ll do whatever it takes to get what he believes he deserves and plays by his own rules. hyuck is so smart and intelligent, both in terms of brains and emotion. he’s absolutely brilliant, and he’s the type of person to ace an exam without even studying for it. I think he did very well in school, and he also beat doyoung in mental maths when they had a competition on weekly idol lol and he’s also street smart. there’s a reason why doyoung and taeil are scared of him and why they prefer to be on his team than against him lmao. I think hyuck is also a people pleaser though. he wants to be liked, and it’ll drive him crazy if someone calls him boring or shows no interest towards him. I think he’ll want a s/o who plays the push and pull game with him. he’ll playfully tease them a lot, and they’ll have to be interesting and able to dazzle him with their own wit and sarcasm. he, like renjun, is snarky and sarcastic. he likes to make people laugh and enjoys being the center of attention. he is super affectionate and rivals jaemin in this aspect. he thrives off of physical touches, hugs, cuddles, etc. he likes to cuddle when he sleeps, and I feel like he enjoys being the little spoon. he isn’t afraid of pda and will show off his s/o to the world with a loud kiss or back hug anywhere. he’s the type who would do that back pocket spin peter does to lara jean lmao. the two of you can laze around at home, while he plays video games on his computer and you can sit in his lap and he’ll do that thing where his arms are around you and his chin is on your shoulder. he’s a good cook, and he’ll cook for you, but he expects you to pay him back in kisses. his s/o might think he doesn’t pay attention to what they’re saying to him, but he does. he absolutely adores his s/o and remembers everything about them. he’s the type to surprise his s/o with their favorite flowers on a random day, and his s/o would’ve thought he wasn’t paying attention when they told him their favorite flower months ago. and please, please, please surprise him with flowers too because that will catch him off guard and you’ll see him blush and get flustered for once. it’s like when the dreamies first debuted, and chenle said hyuck was the best singer and he wanted to be like hyuck, and hyuck got really quiet and shy and flustered about it. however, he’d get really shy around his crush if they weren’t friends first. there’s that video of him returning something that twice’s mono dropped I think and he was so nervous before and afterwards. or there’s that time when he handed flowers to seungwoo and got so flustered as the dreamies teased him afterwards. also, I feel like sometimes people forget that so much hard work goes into what he does because he makes it look so effortless. hyuck works so hard in everything and puts his all into what he does. anyway, please appreciate hyuck and love him lots. he deserves to be showered in love and affection.

JAEMIN :: jaemin is like jeno in the sense that his character is also super versatile. you can make him fit any type of persona for your fic. jaemin is a sweetheart. his entire existence is love. hyuck said that he treats his members the same way he treats his fans in an episode of weekly idol before. he’s a really affectionate person as seen in the way he showers jisung with affection. he eats, sleeps, and breathes aegyo. you’re going to experience his aegyo a lot if you’re his s/o, so brace yourself. he even managed to make hyuck flustered when he kissed him in that recent reload era game video. he has a lot of love to give out, but he also wants the same amount of love in return. you can see how he craves for love from jisung in return and the way he gets a little upset when he doesn’t get it, like when jisung didn’t call him his favorite hyung. his s/o needs to be okay with being showered with affection and love, and they have to do the same for him. call him cute pet names, give him random kisses throughout the day, back hug him while he’s cooking, he will just absolutely glow and bask in your love. jaemin is good at cooking. he will cook for you, and if you cook, he’ll eat what you make with no complaints. it’s like that meme where person A gives person B a drink with salt in it, and person B drinks it all, and when person A asks why they did that even though it was salty, person B says it’s because they didn’t want to hurt person A’s feelings. jaemin is person B. he’ll also make you model for him and pose literally everywhere so he can take pictures of you because you’re the prettiest person in the entire world to him. he’ll make you his lockscreen, homescreen, hang up pictures of you in his room, all that jazz. he’s the one who buys couple items or outfits and makes you wear them with them. his entire Instagram account will be pictures of you or with you. however, he’s also petty af and nags a lot lmao. he complained to jeno when jisung said he wanted to eat bread at 3 a.m. and how he couldn’t go out to buy him any. he also nagged renjun in one of those dream vs dream videos for not having any questions about him, while all his questions were about renjun. or when he was sulking about jeno not knowing his favorite cartoon character. I believe he mentioned having extreme mood swings too where he’s either too quiet or too loud and out there, and as a s/o, you’d have to cater to both sides of him. jaemin is also an introvert. he’s very quiet and shy around strangers, but he’ll unleash his inner weirdness and loudness when he feels comfortable around you, and you’re in for a wild, fun ride. in that video where he and jeno were making cakes, he seems really hyper and wild. same goes for that video where they went out to eat, and jaemin was pouring soda into a glass dramatically. or when they played that dance game where you have to add onto the dance and copy the previous dances, and he added some random flailing motion and complained when someone did it wrong. or when he and renjun were paired up for that guessing game when they both had headphones on, and he started flailing everywhere and getting kinda frustrated at renjun for getting zero right. he’s a bit weird lmao. as his s/o, i hope you go along with his weird antics and have fun with him too! you also have to remind him to take care of himself. make sure he doesn’t drink that ungodly coffee drink of his or eat too much sugar. take care of him, love him, cherish him, and jaemin will be the best boyfriend ever. he might even set up a whole led light display for you at night declaring his love like he did for jeno. actually, no, he definitely will. he’ll do big grand gestures to show his love for you. he’ll fill your house with roses and press kisses to each of your fingertips with a different reason for why he loves you. he’ll continue to list the reasons for why he loves you for every star he sees until he runs out of stars, but he’ll never run out of reasons for loving you.

CHENLE :: chenle was born to be a star. he is so incredibly talented and picks up skills so quickly. it’s evident because he managed to debut after two months of training and he became fluent in korean quickly. he’s humble and gracious, and he’s the embodiment of that miss universe song: he’s beauty, he’s grace. he doesn’t flaunt his wealth, in fact, it only ever comes up because others bring it up. or he accidentally shows it off when he asks what rent means or when he tries to innocently rectify the situation, like when jaemin was like “oh his parents held a concert for him for his bday” and chenle was like “noooo no it was just to make a memory” on idol room lmao. the way he expresses his love is through gift giving. it shows in the way he told mark he’ll buy him anything he wants for his bday or when he gave apple watches to the 00 liners or when he immediately agreed to buy jeno a plane ticket to china to show him around his home. but he’s not trying to flaunt his wealth. this is simply how he shows his love. chenle is laidback and easygoing. he doesn’t care about jisung using honorifics with him, and he’ll go along with whatever’s happening. there’s that one video during mfal era where hyuck and chenle won the prize and hyuck was like “hey I’ll take the prize ok?” and chenle just immediately agrees and doesn’t care at all. but don’t get me wrong, chenle is super competitive. he wants to win, but it’s more about that feeling you get when you’re the winner, rather than the actual prize for him. he’s really into sports, specifically basketball, so i feel like he’d enjoy it if his s/o expressed some sort of interest in it with him. they don’t have to play basketball with him, but he’d appreciate it greatly if they listened to him talk about stephen curry or cheer him on from the sidelines. he’s affectionate. if you read my renjun description, chenle is the other one that hyuck said doesn’t mind affection from the other members on weekly idol. I don’t see him showing affection blatantly as much like hyuck and jaemin, but I think he loves receiving it. chenle obviously receives so much love from his family and is super close to them. he will love his s/o with his whole heart, and I hope his s/o will love him back just as much. also, I’m pretty sure he’ll love his s/o acting cute because his heart rate spiked up when jisung did aegyo on idol room lmao. I think he’s the only other extrovert in the dreamies, besides hyuck. I believe someone asked jaemin or skz hyunjin if they got close after the collab stage, and they said that they were really awkward with each other. however, skz felix and chenle became good friends! chenle is friendly and a people person. he thrives in social settings, and he’s a social butterfly. he’ll help people out of their shells and make sure to include them in conversations. he’s the type of person who would clear his throat and be like “hey y/n has something to say” if you tried to say something in a group convo and weren’t heard. he’s fine with being the center of attention, but he doesn’t actively seek out that position, like hyuck does. unlike hyuck, he’s not a people pleaser. I think he’s confident in himself, and he’s self assured and satisfied with who he is, so he doesn’t really care what others think of him. chenle is really playful. he likes to tease the other members and wreak harmless havoc lol you can see how he plays around with the other members, like in nct life where he just throws snow at jisung or scares jisung with a rubber chicken when they went to an amusement park in shanghai. he’s a thrill seeker. he loves roller coasters, shooting games, laser tag, etc. he gets excited over the littlest things, and he’s a naturally cheerful person who lights up the room and just naturally has people gravitate towards him. however, he has his serious moments too, and I can see him sitting next to his s/o behind the piano and playing something for them. but then, he’ll probably ruin the soft moment by slamming his hands down on the keys and scaring them at the end.

JISUNG :: jisung reminds me of high school puppy love. he’s curious about the world and introspective. he asked the fans to send him pictures of the moon because he couldn’t see it himself. I think he has a lot of deep thoughts and keeps them to himself because he’s introverted and nervous about sharing them aloud in case he’s not taken seriously as the youngest. he’s inquisitive and sweet, and he’s the culmination of everything good in the universe. he’s the one whom renjun talks to about aliens and paranormal things, and I believe he’ll want a s/o who will take him seriously on these things and listens to his concerns without teasing or making fun of him for believing in them. jisung is shy and gets embarrassed when he’s given compliments. there’s this video where the dreamies read compliments from fans aloud, and you can see how flustered and shy he gets as he ducks his head, has to pause and cover his face before playing with his hair as he reads through the compliments with the biggest smile peeking on his face. I think this is the cutest thing ever, and at the beginning of the relationship, if his s/o compliments him or does something cute, he’s going to react exactly like that. tell him his dancing is amazing, watch his fancams around him, tell him his face is nice to look at, etc. and you’ll see him get reduced to a flustered, blushing mess. the first time he sees you wearing one of his sweaters with the sleeves covering your hands and giving you sweater paws, he will combust and stutter and not be able to look at you as his cheeks turn red. he might just suffer a heart attack if you decide to casually call him a cute pet name one day. additionally, jisung is at that age where he wants to know what others think of him and he wants to be liked. I think this is the reason why he’s more hesitant about speaking up or voicing himself in an unfamiliar environment because he doesn’t want to give off a negative image. he’s also painfully shy, but he wants to make friends, which he explains on dancing high. because of this, he truly cherishes any friendship or relationship he has because it’s seen as something incredibly special to him. as his s/o, you’re gonna mean the world to him and he will value your opinion greatly. once he’s comfortable around you, he’ll be loud and talkative. jeno says that jisung talks the most at the dorm and he’s never quiet. jisung is also a lil shit lol, and he knows how to get out of things, like cleaning up after dinner by locking himself in the bathroom. he’s also a little lazy and probably not the cleanest tbh. he sleeps in jaemin’s bed or in the living room because he’s too lazy to go to his top bunk. he doesn’t listen to his hyungs and talks down to them in a playful way because he knows they’re whipped for him lmao. when the relationship progresses, jisung is going to act in the same, exact way with you. he’s a savage, and he will roast you in the same way he roasts his hyungs, like when hyuck wanted to go to LA with him for why not the dancer and he was like “you have to be good at dancing to go” (which btw, fight me, jisung, hyuck is literally the best dancer). he’ll tease you, hide items on the tallest shelf just so that you’ll call him for help, and smush your cheeks and call you cute. he’ll ruffle your hair and run up behind you and sweep you off your feet princess style just to scare you before carefully placing you back down or tossing you into the pool lol he may have complained about carrying renjun in that reload era game video, but he’ll give you piggy backs when you’re tired or carry you around if you asked. he likes playing video games and those block breaker game apps and when he loses, he’ll sit there and pout without realizing it. he does that little nose scrunch unknowingly, and it’s the cutest. he’ll like dates at home the best. he sucks at cooking, but he’ll try to do it for you. but it’ll end up with you cooking while he back hugs you, and you have to walk around the kitchen with him being a koala attached to you as you feed him bits of the food being made.

[svnflowervol666]

Hiii I just read all your writings and I LOVED THEM 💖💖 So can you write a lil blurb where it's Y/N's birthday and he does some cute shit for her

Word Count: 1.7k

Warnings: tiny mention of smut (at the end)

Author’s Note: I absolutely ADORED writing this one. Thank you so much! Requests are open, so drop an idea into my inbox if you’ve got one! Take care and tpwk.

Just as she was finishing up her makeup in the bathroom before work, an unflattering photo of her longtime boyfriend wearing a bright green face mask illuminated her phone screen, signifying that he was trying to facetime with her. The photo always made her laugh no matter how hard her day had been, so she’d set it as his contact photo.

“Hello my beautiful boy,” Y/N sang when the call adjusted and she could finally see Harry’s face smiling at her from ear to ear.

“And hello to you too, my beautiful birthday girl!” Harry exclaimed right back.

Much to his protest, Harry had ended up smack dab in the middle of a North American tour on his girlfriend’s birthday. He’d tried his hardest to schedule a break in between today so he would be able to spend some time with her on her special day, but it didn’t end up working out and both Harry and Y/N were fairly bummed about it. 

“Thank you, love,” she grinned into the camera, making Harry’s heart soar. 

“Ye’ getting ready f’ work?”

“Unfortunately,” Y/N faked a pout, “Should be an easy day, though. What about you?”

“Just got back to m’ hotel room. Show tonight was great. I wish you could’ve gotten off work to hop on tour for a few days.”

“You know how my boss is,” Y/N sounded somewhat sad and it made Harry’s chest feel tight knowing how badly she had wanted to come visit him.

“Hmm,” Harry pondered, “’M starting t’ think she’s got a crush on me n’ that’s why she never gives you any days off.”

This made a laugh blossom from deep in Y/N’s belly.

“Everyone’s got a crush on you, bubby.”

“Too bad I’ve only got eyes f’ you. Anyways,” Harry quickly moved on to the next subject.

“I’ve called you to tell you where I’ve hidden your birthday present.”

“Harry,” Y/N scolded him, “I told you not to get me anything.”

“Yeah, well, ye’ know I wasn’t gonna listen. Love spoilin’ ya. It’s in the back of my underwear drawer. Should be a little velvet box.”

Y/N rolled her eyes at Harry to which he blew her a cheeky kiss through the screen in response. She grabbed her phone while she traveled from the bathroom into their bedroom and began riffling through Harry’s intimates drawer. 

“Quick question, H. Why your underwear drawer?”

All Harry could see of Y/N was her forehead while her fingers moved past his folded up boxers and dug for the small gift.

“It’s the only thing of mine you don’t steal. Figured it’d be least likely t’ be found if I kept it in there when I left.”

“Touche, my love. Alright, I’ve got it. Want me to open it now?”

“It would kinda make sense to, now, wouldn’t it?”

“You’re such a smartass.”

“You love me anyway.”

She chuckled as she propped her cell phone up against her bedside lamp so Harry could see her reaction when she found out what was inside. When she removed the small metallic bow that was placed on top, she lifted the lid and her expression turned into one of confusion and uncertainty.

“Is this the ring that you lost a few months ago?”

Indeed, it was. It was Y/N’s favorite out of the hefty collection of rings that Harry hoarded. Sometimes, Harry would let her pick out which rings he wore and her eyes always landed on that one. She was never able to give him a reason other than she was simply drawn to it; the way it danced in the sunlight when his hand stuck out from the covers in the morning, the way it accentuated his perfect, long fingers. 

Or perhaps, there was a reason why she loved it so much. This ring in particular was one that Harry had purchased from a local jewler when they were on a holiday in Greece. That very same night, Harry had gotten wine-drunk (more like wine-wasted) and had confessed a secret to her. 

“You know something, Y/n?” he drunkenly babbled whilst wagged his finger adorned with his new ring in her face, “I’m gonna marry you one day.”

She’d never bring the memory back up to Harry, however she was never able to forget that night or his ring waving itself right in front of his face. It was just another one of those moments where she knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that Harry was the one for her. Knowing this, one could have seen why Y/N had gotten rather upset when Harry had revealed to her that he had “misplaced it” and had no earthly idea where it had gone. Unbeknownst to her, Harry hadn’t actually lost it at all.

“It is. I didn’t actually lose it. I know ye’ love it, so I had it sized down to fit your finger. Do ye’ like it?”

“I love it. Thank you, Harry.”

Y/N felt her eyes instinctively well up with tears. She hadn’t told Harry, but she always had a hard time whenever he was gone for prolonged periods of time. The bed was always cold, her meals didn’t taste as good, and there was no one there to hold her when her day went less than ideal. Knowing how much thought went into a gift like this only widened the hole in her heart that appeared every time Harry left for tour.

“Aww, don’t cry, lovie. Not on your birthday.”

Y/N gently wiped the corners of her eyes and shook her head, “I’m good. Promise. Just miss you a lot is all.”

“Miss you too, baby. I wish I wasn’t so far away from ye’.”

“It’s only a few more weeks, right? I’ll survive,” Y/N stood up from where she was sat on the bed and straightened out her blouse before picking the phone up from the nightstand, “Guess I should probably head out now.”

“Alright,” Harry reassured her with a wrinkle in his brow. 

He absolutely hated knowing that his girl was upset. Not only because it was her birthday, a day that was all about celebrating her, but because he was on another continent and couldn’t be there to soothe her.

“I’ll call you again tonight. Sound good?”

“Sounds great.”

“Have a good day, Y/N,” Harry said sincerely.

“I’ll try.”

They exchanged one last loving look before Y/N ended the call and left the house she shared with Harry to go to work.

Her day wasn’t half as bad as she’d envisioned it to be. Upon arrival, her coworkers greeted her with her favorite coffee and donuts accompanied by a plethora of multi-colored balloons tossed about the office space. Everyone was extra nice to her and offered to take on some of her paperwork for her, which she certainly didn’t mind. Around lunchtime, she received a massive delivery of canary yellow sunflowers from the one and only, Harry Styles. Attached to the bouquet was a simple note card that read, For my sunflower on her special day. -H. This earned her a series of hoots and hollers from the other employees at the office (and she almost swears a scolding look from her boss), which she promptly brushed off and continued on working.

On the long drive home, she’d chatted with her small, close group of friends about the outing they had planned for her that weekend. It was mostly about the bars they had planned on going to and about how wasted they knew they were going to be, but even the playful banter in between them couldn’t manage to pull Y/N out of the funk she was in. Sure, she could put on a happy face and act like she enjoyed the attention she was receiving for her birthday, but none of it really meant much when the one person she cared about most wasn’t there to celebrate with her.

When she opened the front door she was hit by the overwhelming scent of aromatics coming from her kitchen. She hadn’t cooked anything this smelly in at least a few days and she certainly didn’t recall smelling it on her way out the door this morning, so her senses were on high alert. Her finger hovered over the emergency button on her cell phone as she rounded the corner, only to be greeted by a tall, curly-headed man-child boiling pasta in his periwinkle-colored bathrobe.

“Harry?!”

“Fuck,” he cursed aloud, “I didn’t think you’d be home this early. I thought I’d have it all done before you got here.”

Typical Harry. The boy’s got big ideas, but his ability to pull them off seldom comes to fruition.

“Well, don’t just stand there. Come kiss me, stupid.”

Harry took a few long strides over to his girlfriend and engulfed her in a bone-crushing hug and kiss, one that left her breathless and feeling full of love. His lips worked passionately against her own and the tip of his tongue prodded at her bottom lip, just the way that he knew she liked. When he pulled back from holding her mouth against his, he saw that she was really crying this time, unable to stop the flow of salty tears from running down her cheekbones and down her chin.

“What are you even doing here?” she asked Harry as he wiped her tears with the pads of this thumb. “I thought you had a show tonight.”

“You see, Y/N. Time zones can be a beautiful thing. I found out I could make it here with a few hours t’ spare before my next show, so I hopped on a plane right after I got off the phone w’ you.”

“You didn’t have to do this, Harry.”

“But I wanted to. Hated seeing you upset this mornin’.”

He noticed she was twiddling the ring he’d gifted her this morning around her finger, to which he raised her hand and inspected it with his own eyes instead of through his phone screen.

“Looks good on you, dunnit?”

Y/N nodded her head, still unable to comprehend that her boyfriend had flown across the globe to see her on her birthday. There weren’t many people on this earth like Harry, and she had never felt happier to know that she had the privilege of being loved by one.

“I love it, H. I really do. Thank you. For all of this.”

She moved her hand away from Harry’s face to kiss his lips once more.

“How long are you staying?” she continued.

Harry sighed, “’ve got to leave at 2am to make it to the show on time.”

“That’s alright. Any time is better than no time.”

“Exactly,” Harry agreed with his love, “So why don’t ye’ go upstairs and change while I finish cookin’ so we can make the most of it, yeah?”

“Yeah, I’ll be right back,” she pulled him in for a third kiss before reluctantly leaving Harry’s side to take off her uncomfortable work clothes.

Just as she ascended the steps that led to their bedroom, she heard Harry call out.

“Actually, don’t bother! It’s not like you’ll have your clothes on for very long anyway!”

[lovestrvck]

introducing the lover . . . beatrice anderson-yamada

handwritten letters, reciting poetry in front of the class, the japanese art of kintsugi.

hey friends !! i’m ash, i’m 23, in the est and i use she / her pronouns !! i’m so excited to rp with you all, your intros are amazing. i’m writing beatrice “bea” anderson-yamada, aka the lover skeleton. i’m really excited to introduce you all to her ! if you want to read her into bio / app, you can find that here

stats

full name: beatrice georgina anderson-yamada

nicknames: bea, tris ( for one terrible month after divergent became big...a lot of regrets there trust me), yamada

gender & pronouns: cis female & she / her

sexuality: bisexual / biromantic

major: first year grad student in creative writing with a concentration in poetry

zodiac: cancer sun

myers-briggs: enfp

hogwarts house: hufflepuff ( but fuck jk )

alignment: lawful good

favorite food: banana pancakes

favorite drink: sweet tea or margaritas

favorite movie: titanic

favorite book: pride and prejudice by jane austen

hometown: kitty hawk, north carolina

current residence: new york, new york ( when not at school ), harcourt institute

character inspo: anne shirley ( anne of green gables ), jess day ( new girl ), guinevere beck ( you ), jo march ( little women ), juliet & romeo ( romeo & juliet )

history

tw: parental death, car accident, death, alcohol

alright i’m gonna try to keep this brief because her app was on the longer end asljdasdj

beatrice was born in kitty hawk, north carolina. it’s on the coast, so she is a lil beach babe. also still has a slight accent that becomes more prominent when she’s mad or drunk

her parents were star-crossed lovers who met in college. they had SUCH a meet-cute, and fell in love pretty quickly ( although they definitely had their flaws that bea doesn’t know about or acknowledge )

her mom was a rich kid from nyc who’s parents disowned her when she married bea’s dad. they moved to north carolina to be near his mom, but she died when bea was three.

anyway, jackie ( bea’s mom ) and alex ( her dad ) loved each other a lot, and they loved her to pieces. they were like the world’s best parents, and were such a close family growing up. bea’s childhood was such a happy one honestly

but then when she was seven, her father died in a car accident. it was obviously very unexpected, and hit both bea and her mother very hard. but bea’s mom was amazing and stepped up and raised her to the best of her ability. bea still felt loved and safe, even though she was of course sad and could see how sad her mother was.

she fell in love with fairytales and romance novels growing up. at some point she just...began to idolize her parents’ love and love in general. her parents’ love is untouchable in her mind - it was perfect. she’s always dreamed of a love like that. 

 in high school, bea sort of went chasing after love. she dated a lot, giving her heart to anyone who seemed like they might want it. beatrice also realized just how much she loved writing and reading poetry. 

when she was seventeen, her estranged grandmother ( jackie’s rich mom ) called them and basically begged them to move in with her. her husband, jackie’s dad and bea’s grandfather, had died of a heart attack in the middle of the night and bea’s grandmother just couldn’t handle being alone. so they packed up and moved to nyc.

bea’s grandmother paid for her college. bea chose harcourt purely based on the romantic factor - it was very gloomy and beautiful when she toured. it didn’t take long to decide on english due to her love of writing. 

joining the society was like, the best thing to ever happen to her. she loves it so much. she takes it very seriously, and loves reading the old texts. she was initiated during junior year of undergrad, and decided to come back for grad school specifically because of that. now she’s a grad student getting a masters in creative writing with a concentration in poetry. 

head canons & personality

bea’s all time literary crushes are gilbert blythe, mr. darcy, elizabeth bennet, jo march, and sydney carton from a tale of two cities. but honestly, she would throw it all away for gilbert blythe. did i mention she has big anne shirley energy ??

bea is immature in a lot of ways because she just sees the world through this rose-colored lens. she idealizes love and thinks that it must be so magical, but real love is messy and it can hurt sometimes. she thinks the love her parents had was just incredible, but honestly? they fought. they got angry at one another. there was a good portion towards the beginning of their relationship where jackie didn’t even want to acknowledge that she was dating alex because her parents wouldn’t approve. things weren’t simple or perfect, but i didn’t include that because that’s not how bea sees it. i would love for her to realize that the idea of love she has is a fantasy, and maybe even start to see her parents as real people and not just the perfect example of true love.

she’s a poet and she really is good. i think her work is sort of flowery now though, and could be better once she herself gets more depth. to me, she’s just floating above everything now, trapped in her own dream land of love and virtue and kindness. she needs someone or something to ground her back into reality.

when she was fourteen, she found one of her father’s journals and it’s her most prized possession. bea still keeps it with her. she brought it to college; it’s on a shelf in her room right now.

she goes by bea or beatrice pretty evenly, honestly.

bea can be a bit dramatic at times. she’s definitely prone to finding things so romantic and then just going to extremes with it. and honestly, she has very high expectations that are unrealistic but good luck getting through to her. 

she’s so full of love honestly. love for others and a love for life. i think she just sees the world as this big romantic adventure, which can be both immature and refreshing at times ? again, she’s so naive but like, she has such a good heart. 

honestly at some point catch her getting a book of poetry published. she’s had a few poems published in literary magazines already, but i really think she has the passion and drive to get a whole book published. and honestly, i could see her doing some more work with prose at some point and maybe even writing a romance novel. 

overall, just a dramatic, loving queen who rarely gets upset. pretty optimistic in general. she never gives up on people; she’s absolutely someone you could call to come get you in the middle of the night if you were stranded. 

i don’t have a connections page yet, but i’m so down to brainstorm some things ! hit me up on discord if you want to plot !

[cherryrogers]

Falling For You.

— Chapter 7

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader

(Modern High School AU)

Warnings: Bucky’s a lil drunk, emotionally abusive parenting, swearing.

Synopsis: Unlike most teenagers, you had your life completely mapped out. You’d graduate high school, go off to the university of your dreams, and live the life that your parents always wanted you to. That was always the plan.

Falling for Bucky Barnes, however, was never part of the plan.

Being ‘just friends’ isn’t enough. Becoming anything more is too much. But suppressed feelings can’t stay ignored forever, and you were about to learn that a lot sooner than you thought.

Inspired by the song ‘Fallingforyou’ - The 1975

A/N: shiz lowkey goes down in this part,,, but there’s still a nice dose of fluff to smooth things over :) i’m v excited for the next chapter though! as always, please enjoy and feedback is appreciated!! x

Series Masterlist

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Walking in the pouring rain during the dark hours of night wasn’t what you had planned for your Friday night. Yet, there you were - doing just that.

You’d never been a party person. Sure, you’d been dragged to a couple through your time at high school, but a quiet night in with an abundance of sweet snacks and some random Netflix film playing on your television sounded a lot more appealing to you than being stuck in a crowded house that stank of alcohol.

That’s why when Wanda asked if you were going to show your face at Thor’s on the morning before the party, you politely declined.

“Are you sure you don’t wanna go?” The girl sighed, her expression looking quite defeated through the screen of your phone, which was resting against a pillow in front of you on your bed. “Even just for an hour?”

You smiled empathetically at her, putting the pen in your hand down on the large notebook sitting in front of your legs. The whole morning had been spent highlighting your notes and making new notes of anything you didn’t yet fully understand. With your mom coming on Sunday, you needed to get as much done as possible, and considering the whole house had yet to be cleaned and presented just how she’d like it, parties weren’t really a priority at that moment.

“I’m too busy, Wanda. I’ll come to the next one, I promise. Look after Bucky for me, will you?”

Your best friend had a tendency to claim he wasn’t going to drink at parties, and ultimately ended up passed out on a random couch by the end of the night. Usually, you’d be there to try and sober him up before he got home so that his mother didn’t scold him, and you weren’t sure if you could trust Steve or Sam to stay sober for the night to take care of Bucky instead.

“I’ll tell him to call you when he gets home.” She reassured you, providing you with a sense of relief.

However, the relief wasn’t so long-lived. Day had soon turned into night, and by the look of the amount of people documenting their drunk friends dancing and doing an unhealthy amount of shots on Snapchat, it was safe to assume that the party had started.

And when you began to receive a phone call from Bucky at around twelve at night, you were hoping that meant he was safely back at home.

That wasn’t the case, though.

Wanda’s voice sounded through the speaker, confusing you slightly. “Hey, I know it’s late, but is there any chance that you could come to Thor’s and pick Bucky up?”

“Is he alright?” You asked.

“He’s... well, drunk as fuck, but it’s nothing a good nights sleep and some water can’t fix.” The girl chuckled. “A bunch of people are just sleeping here for the night, and I was gonna let Bucky do the same, but then I saw a bunch of messages from his mom on his phone that he’d dropped on the floor and not bothered to pick up. She seemed pretty worried, and I think it’s best that she knows he’s in good hands for the night. Your hands being the good hands, I mean.”

While you weren’t particularly looking forward to trailing up to a party when you should be tucked up in bed, you were glad Wanda called you and asked for you to get Bucky out of there. At least you knew he’d be safe for the night if you took him back to yours - his house would be way too much of a trek for you, considering you didn’t have a car. You’d been to Thor’s before - his house was only a ten minute walk from yours.

“I’ll be there in ten.” You responded, before tugging on a pair of sneakers and a hoodie with the jacket Bucky gave you over it.

Dealing with a drunk Bucky Barnes would surely liven up the night.

And well, it did.

As soon as you stepped through the front door of Thor’s house and got a nose full of sweat and strong spirits, you didn’t even have time to scrunch up your nose at the scents when someone wrapped their arms around your shoulders, leaning almost all of their weight onto you.

“I thought you weren’t coming, (Y/N)!” The person slurred, and you instantly recognised who had you in an incredibly tight hug.

“I’m not staying for long.” You said against his chest. “Buck, I kinda can’t breathe here.”

Slowly, Bucky unwrapped his arms from around you and placed them on your shoulders, smiling lazily at you. “Sorry, I was just excited to s-see you. C’mon, I’ll get us a drink.”

He tried to tug you into the kitchen, but you stayed put. “If you have any more to drink, you’ll throw up, Bucky. I’m taking you back to mine for the night.”

“Oh.” The boy giggled, wiggling his brows. “How exciting.”

“Get your mind out of the gutter, James.” You rolled your eyes, motioning for him to follow you back out of the front door. However, from the way he was stumbling haphazardly towards you, you decided that he might need some support on the way home.

You cringed when his hip collided with the doorframe as he took another step forward, a quiet groan escaping his lips. You wrapped your right arm around his waist and hoisted his arm around your shoulder, allowing him to lean on you. It wasn’t an ideal position to be in, but if it got Bucky back to your place without any more injuries, you guessed that you could deal with it.

A sigh fell from your lips as you stepped out into the heavy rain once again, and Bucky let out another groan. “Man, I d-don’t even have a jacket.”

Quickly, you shrugged off the leather jacket you were wearing and handed it to the boy. It didn’t have a hood, but it’d still keep him a little warmer in the bitter weather. “Here, it’s yours anyway.”

It took a bit of struggling, but Bucky finally pulled on the jacket and returned to your side, slinging his arm back around your shoulders. “Thank you, sweets.”

“It’s alright, Buck.” You replied, hearing the pattering of the rain getting louder and feeling it pelt your body like small bullets. “Let’s hurry up and get outta the rain, okay?”

By the time the both of you fell through your front door, your shoulders had began to ache, the two of you were utterly drenched, and Bucky was struggling to keep his eyes open. As soon as the warmth from inside your house hit his shivering form, the urge to sleep had suddenly overwhelmed him, and he certainly wasn’t hiding that.

While you quickly sent a text to his mom informing her that Bucky was safe, the boy had slid his back down the wall of your hallway before tipping his head back against it, shutting his eyes completely. “M’going to sleep.”

You sighed, putting his phone down and sending a final text to Wanda from your phone letting her know the same thing. Your phone slipped back into your pocket and you crouched down to Bucky’s level. “You can’t sleep here, Bucky. Don’t you wanna lay on something more comfortable? Maybe have a glass of water first?”

“Just w-wanna sleep.” He shook his head, keeping his eyes closed.

“Your clothes are still soaked.” You gestured towards his damp jeans and jacket. “At least come and get changed, and if you really want to, you can come back down here and sleep on the floor, alright?”

You only said that because you knew he wouldn’t want to actually sleep on the floor for the night - the guy was just being lazy.

With a hesitant nod, Bucky grabbed the hand you’d outstretched to him and pulled himself up, immediately putting his other hand on the bannister of the stairs to keep himself upright. You slowly but surely led him up to your bedroom, biting back a smile as you watched Bucky throw himself on top of your bed sheets and nuzzle his face into your pillows.

If he wasn’t so wasted, you would’ve threatened to drag him by the ankles off your bed if he didn’t get up himself, but you gave him the benefit of the doubt for that night.

After opening the doors of your closet, you skimmed the array of hoodies that were hung up on the right side of the space; most of them were oversized anyway, so you were sure Bucky would be able to wear one of them. As for pants, well, Bucky was a pretty tall guy. None of your sweatpants would likely fit him comfortably.

You pulled out a burgundy hoodie which was probably twice your actual clothing size and chucked it towards the boy who was almost asleep in the centre of your bed. His eyebrows furrowed as he lifted his head, tired eyes scanning the hoodie.

“It’s for you to sleep in.” You confirmed to him, heading towards your bedroom door. “I’m gonna go and get you some water while you change, alright?”

“Wait.” You heard Bucky say after you were about to head out of the door.

Turning back around, you raised you brow at him. “What is it, Bucky?”

“I’m...” The boy started, laughing as he tried to get the rest of his sentence out. “I’m going to the dance with Natasha.”

Your brow raised even higher, not expecting him to say, well, that.

“Oh, you are?” You asked, causing him to nod as he swung his legs over the side of the bed, shrugging off the jacket he was wearing.

“Uh huh.” Bucky replied, beginning to laugh again. “It’s k-kinda funny, though, ‘cause I didn’t even ask her myself! Sam said I should go with her since you were already goin’ with s-someone else-”

“Wait, what?” Your mouth hung open in surprise. Okay, hold up. Bucky was only going to the dance with Natasha because you had already been asked?

Could you even trust what he was saying in that moment? Bucky was still drunk, maybe he was getting confused. But why would he even say that if it wasn’t the truth?

Did that mean Bucky really did want to ask you to be his date? Was that what he was going to say before Pietro interrupted him, only to ask for you to be his date instead? Fuck.

This wasn’t good. While there was a part of you that felt warm from knowing you were originally Bucky’s first choice for a date to the dance, the rest of you was screaming. Perhaps he just wanted to ask you because you were his closest friend. That’s the reason you wanted to go with Bucky, right? If it was for another reason which involved certain feelings... well, you just weren’t going to think about that.

“What?” Bucky’s puzzled response pulled you from your thoughts, and by the look on his face, you assumed he probably couldn’t even remember the words that had just left his mouth.

You decided against questioning him further. The poor guy was drunk, and you shouldn’t use that as an opportunity to get answers out of him that he wouldn’t want to admit when he was sober.

“Uh, nothing.” You shook your head, backing out of the door again. “I’ll be back soon.”

Giving Bucky enough time to change in his drunken state, you slowly made your way down to the kitchen and grabbed a glass from the cupboard to fill with water. You tried not to let the thoughts about the dance whirl around your mind, but it was difficult. Honestly, you didn’t mind that he was going with Natasha. When he said that him and Natasha were only friends, you believed him, and you were happy that he had a friend to go with just like you did.

It didn’t take long for you to return to your bedroom, Bucky’s water in hand. The sight you’d walked into made you chuckle; the boy had the hoodie on thankfully, and was tucked underneath the cream sheets on top of your mattress. He looked peaceful, and you were glad that he made it fairly easy for you to get him to sleep.

You placed the water on the bedside table next to him, and as you were about the tip toe out of the room and spend the night on the couch in the living room, you felt a hand loosely wrap around your wrist.

“Don’t go.” Bucky’s muffled voice said to you. Heat instantly rose in your cheeks thinking about even sleeping next to him. That would be too intimate, right? Too intimate for two people who weren’t meant to be intimate.

“Bucky, I’ll just be downstairs...” You tried to reason, but the boy wasn’t having it.

“Please?” He squinted one eye open, silently pleading for you to give in.

If you laid next to him until he fell asleep, you could leave straight after. As long as it got him to sleep, it didn’t matter, right?

It didn’t even occur to you that your wet clothes were still clinging to your body as you climbed into your bed, making sure to keep your distance from the boy on the other side of the bed. Even without being near him, you could feel the heat radiating from his body, and it only made you want to be closer to him.

After a few seconds of silence, a small voice broke the quiet. “Night, (Y/N).”

You smiled, turning your body so that you were both facing away from each other. The night hadn’t been as stressful as you’d presumed, and as long as Bucky was okay, you were sure you could be too. Your friendship with him was more important than anything. Even if it never amounted to anything more, and the thought of that broke your heart a little, you never wanted to lose him, truthfully. And if what he needed was a friend, you were going to be a good friend to him.

Lightly closing your eyes, you quietly sighed. “Goodnight, Buck.”

* * *

“Oh, fuck.”

Light flooded through the curtains into your room, casting shadows across the bed that you were still lying in. The bed you were meant to be leaving in the middle of the night.

You had slept with Bucky.

Well, not ‘slept’, but you had physically slept next to him all night. Did friends do that? Was that okay? You weren’t really sure. What you were sure of was that it was definitely time for you to get up.

As you went to sit up, a weight on your stomach limited your movements. Bucky’s arm was laying across your middle as he slept on his stomach, soft snores still escaping his pink lips. You tensed, knowing that he probably accidentally let his arm drape over you, but it was still there, and you couldn’t help but blush a little.

Quickly, you removed Bucky’s arm from your stomach and placed it gently back on the mattress before scrambling out of bed. You groaned, looking down at the hoodie you were still wearing and the leggings you hadn’t yet changed out of.

Bucky would most likely be out cold for another hour or so, allowing you to freshen yourself up ready for the day ahead of you. If Bucky wanted to stay at yours for the day, you didn’t mind, but you desperately needed to clean up the house ready for you mom’s arrival and finish up any topics that you hadn’t fully studied. Hopefully, you could have everything perfect for Sunday.

After showering and brushing your teeth, you changed into a simple t-shirt and sweatpants before making your way downstairs to make something for breakfast. You didn’t want to wake Bucky just yet; he definitely needed a good sleep with the hangover he’d probably have when he did wake.

Once you padded down the staircase and paced into the kitchen, you shrieked slightly and placed a hand over your chest, seeing a figure seated with their back to you on a stool at the kitchen counter. Their hair was tied back in a neat bun; you could recognise that too-perfect hairstyle anywhere.

“Mom?” You breathed out, unsure if you were literally seeing things or if your mother had actually snuck into the house while you were still asleep.

The woman turned around, her lips pressed into a straight line. “I’ve been waiting twenty minutes for you to come down here.”

“Well, hello to you too...” You mumbled, furrowing your brows as you placed your hands on your hips. “What are you doing here? I thought you were coming tomorrow.”

“Clearly.” She let out an empty laugh, scraping her eyes around the room, eyeing the dirty dishes that had yet to be washed and counters that hadn’t been wiped down. “I hope my home isn’t normally this... unclean.”

My home. The woman was never even there, how could she call it her home? “It would’ve been clean if you’d arrived tomorrow, like you said you were going to.”

“My plans changed.” She replied simply, standing from her seat and approaching you, crossing her arms over her chest. “Well, do I at least get a cup of tea after my two hour train journey here this morning?”

You suppressed a sigh, nodding as you walked over to the sink and filled up the kettle with water before placing it on the stovetop. “So, dad couldn’t make it?”

Your father had sent you a brief text to say that his schedule was too full to visit this weekend. Being used to it, you let him know that it was okay. At least he had the courtesy of informing you of his change in plans, unlike some other people.

“He couldn’t.” You mother confirmed. “But that means we can have a proper conversation about your plans for college, (Y/N). He doesn’t have a preference for what Ivy League school you want to attend, but I do.”

Of course - after not seeing you for almost a month, the first thing your mother wanted to talk about was college.

After preparing the tea and handing a cup to your mother across the counter, you leaned back against the stovetop and sighed. “Harvard.”

“Mhm. Now, I see no reason why you shouldn’t go there-”

“Mom, it’s ten in the morning. Can’t I at least eat before we attempt to talk about this?” Key word - attempt. There was no way that you were agreeing on going to Harvard, and there was no way that your mother was backing down from the idea, so the conversation was utterly pointless.

Your mother tightened her jaw. “No, (Y/N), we will talk about it now. This is important, you know.”

“I know.” You forced a smile. “Which is why I need food in my stomach before I listen to you go off at me and take none of my feelings into account.”

Her lips turned into a scowl. “(Y/N)-”

A whine sounded from the direction of the staircase, causing your mother to close her lips, and your heart to instantly stop. Fuck, holy fuck. You were dead. You never thought you’d die before the age of twenty one, but here you were, positively awaiting for your mother to kill you.

Bucky plodded down the stairs, rubbing his eyes with fisted hands, shirtless, not noticing the shocked stare that your mother was aiming at him. “God, I really need an aspirin. Last night was...” His raspy words trailed off, and if you weren’t practically crapping yourself, you’d probably be swooning over his sleepy voice.

The boy pulled his hands away from his face, his lips forming and ‘o’ shape as his puffy eyes landed on the smartly dressed woman with her fists clenched tightly at her sides next to her pencil skirt. She turned around to face you, eyes flaming with an anger you’d never seen before. You tried to say something, anything. However, nothing would be able to soften the blow you were about to receive from your mother.

“(Y/N),” The woman started, her teeth gritted. “What in God’s name is this boy doing here?”

“I-” Bucky tried to interject, but was immediately stopped by your mother.

“I was not asking you, I was asking my daughter.”

Shit. What were you even meant to say? “He’s my friend.”

Bucky had never met your parents before. He wasn’t even sure you’d mentioned him to them, purely because they’d react exactly how your mother was acting now. He really wished he’d put on a shirt before he came downstairs, but he truthfully wasn’t even thinking. He only wanted to come down and thank you for taking care of him, and well, he’d came down to something much worse.

“Well, you friend is shirtless and seems to have a terrible hangover.”

The woman wasn’t wrong. Bucky’s undereyes were darker than usual, his actual eyes were tired, and the way he walked down those stairs... well, he didn’t exactly look one hundred percent sober.

An uncomfortable silence fell between the three of you, and you were begging for a black hole to appear in the floor and swallow you up. Anything to get out of the horrible situation you were in.

“Mom, look-”

“No, you look.” Your mother spat, shutting you up. “This- this is disgustingly unacceptable! Your father and I work hard to pay for this house, to pay for you to live here on your own, to pay for your textbooks and to eventually pay for your college tuition, and you repay us by slacking in school and bringing boys into our home to sleep with?”

“What?” You almost yelled, taken aback by your mother’s words. Bucky looked rather shocked too, and he looked like he wanted to intervene again, but you beat him to it. “Mom, I’m not- Bucky and I aren’t sleeping together! And- and I want to be thankful for all of that, I really do. But how can I when you’re only paying for all of it to make yourselves happy? As long as I go to the college that you want me to go to and get the job that you want me to get, you don’t care about what I actually want.”

Your mother was fuming. You couldn’t even believe that you were actually saying all of that stuff to her, but it was bound to come out eventually. “You don’t get a choice because I know you won’t make the right decisions. I’m doing this because I care-”

“Don’t you dare say that you care about me.” You shook your head, feeling a lump forming in your throat but no tears in your eyes. “If you cared, you wouldn’t leave me alone in this house for weeks on end, or get mad at me for making the smallest mistakes, or scold me for helping out a friend. You don’t care, Mom - you never have.”

At that moment, you were done. Maybe there was another conversation needed to be had with your mother, but all you’d wanted to say right now had been said, and all you wanted was for her to get out of your sight. To your relief, the woman picked up her bags that were resting against the counter and started towards the front door. Though, she could never leave without having the very last word.

“I don’t know who you’ve become since your father and I have been out of town, but you are certainly not our daughter anymore.”

And with that, the door slammed shut.

You’d briefly forgotten that Bucky was in the room until you heard footsteps coming towards you. Your eyes stayed glued to the wooden floorboards, refusing to look up, afraid that your feelings would get the best of you and send you into crying mess. That woman wasn’t doing to be the one to make you cry; you wouldn’t give her the satisfaction.

“(Y/N)...” The boy broke the silence, his voice barely above a whisper. He wanted to apologise for coming downstairs, but he knew that wasn’t the problem. Whether she’d seen him or not, the argument between you and your mother probably would’ve happened anyway. “What are you thinking about?”

The question surprised you a little, but you tried to answer it nonetheless. “I... uh, fuck. I don’t... I don’t know what to think. I’ve never argued with her like that before. I’ve never seen her so infuriated. But she’s gone now, and until she comes back, I’m... I’m just gonna pretend that she never came back in the first place.”

Bucky didn’t look convinced, but he also had a feeling that your mother wouldn’t be back any time soon. Perhaps it’d be better for you to take your attention away from your parents and focus on yourself for a while, and when the time came to deal with your parents again, you’d be in a better place to do so. If you needed to talk about them, however, Bucky hoped that you already knew you could go to him.

“Okay.” He nodded, crossing his arms. “Thanks for last night, by the way. I can’t remember a lot of it, honestly, but I didn’t wake up with vomit down my shirt, and that probably would’ve happened if you didn’t pick me up from the party...”

You scrunched up your nose and chuckled, momentarily forgetting about the ordeal that had just occurred. “That’s kinda gross, Buck, but you’re welcome. At least when you’re here, I know that you’re safe and not getting yourself into any trouble.”

“Aw, do you worry about me, sweets?” Bucky smirked, a glint in his blue eyes that made your knees weak. You were suddenly aware yet again that he was shirtless, and you couldn’t help but rake your eyes up his torso just once before pretending he had no effect on you whatsoever.

With your signature eye roll, you stepped back from him and walked towards the fridge. “Go put a shirt on while I make breakfast, James.”

“What’s on the menu this morning?” Bucky asked cheerily, moving towards the staircase.

“Pancakes.”

“Hot food that wasn’t frozen beforehand? You’re becoming quite the chef, (Y/N).”

You bit back a smile, glaring playfully at the boy as you got out the ingredients for the pancakes. “If you’re still standing here in the next five seconds, you’re not getting breakfast. You also need to text your mom, and Steve and Sam, and you should probably let Thor know-”

“Alright, alright.” Bucky interrupted, beginning to jog up the stairs, not before he called out to you one more time. “God, where would I be without you, sweets?”

The question was rhetorical, but Bucky knew the answer; somewhere he definitely didn’t want to be. Anywhere that wasn’t with you was a place he never wanted to be in. He always wanted to be a part of your life. To help you deal with your parents, to pick you up when you’d been knocked down, to give you the world because that’s what you deserved. A life without you was a life that Bucky never wanted.

And everyday that you still didn’t feel the same way towards him was another day he was afraid of letting you slip away.

Whether you felt the same or not, Bucky had to do something soon. Something being anything that would show you how he really felt towards you. It was eating away at him, and if he didn’t act fast, he’d lose himself as well as you.

All he wanted was for you to be his. For him to know that you were his. But he unknowingly already had your heart, no matter how much you wanted to deny it.

You were his from the very start, and you would be until the end. You had fallen painfully hard for Bucky Barnes, and you weren’t sure if falling for him was a blessing or a curse.

Whatever it was, it definitely wasn’t going away any time soon.

* * *

Taglist:

@itz-kira @americas-ass-assins @stevieboyharrington @broco8

[rumorchastain]

[ JOSHUA BASSETT. CIS MALE. HE/HIM. ] [ RUMOR CHASTAIN ] is a [ NINETEEN ] year old [ FIRST AID ] at camp reviere. [ HE ] makes me think of [ READING A BOOK IN A FIELD OF WHEAT, A LONE HOUSE IN THE COUNTRY IN FLAMES, AND SMOKING ALONE IN YOUR CAR ].their favorite horror movie is [ THE WICKER MAN ] and they remind me of [ BEN MEARS ]. [ filene. 19. pst. she/her. ]

yes it’s me again with another character, this is my bb rumor aka probably my favorite muse of all time so i had to bring him and i’ll save you from reading my whole mess about myself and plotting again (find that on sookies intro or else) so here’s my bb rumor !! ALSO SORRY IF THIS IS A MESS I KINDA RUSHED IT 

full bio is linked here

his pinterest is here

trigger warnings: mentions of death/disappearance, bullying, and brief mention of alcohol and drugs

rumor chastain was an accident in his family - but that doesn’t mean he was unwanted. his parents, delilah and benjamin, were more than happy to have another child after their daughter verity (who was around ten when rumor was born).

the chastain family lived on a farm in the countryside, far from the nearest town and no neighbors in sight. just the four of them and their lovely house, along with all the animals rumor affectionately named and cared for. being the baby of the family his parents ensured he took that role, never giving him any big responsibilities on the farm and rather letting him roam about as he pleased. he was a happy child, and he loved his life. he did his chores early in the morning so he could run out and see the sunrise, spend the rest of his day running up and down the hills picking flowers and finding figures in the clouds. he’d stay out there until the sunset, counting every new star in the sky until there were too many, and only coming home once his mother called him down for dinner.

when he was old enough for school he was homeschooled along his sister verity, who taught him his abcs and how to read while teaching herself geometry. they were isolated in their country home, but rumor didn’t mind, he had everything he needed. his family was his best friends, and their property seemed like the whole wide world to him. he loved that farm more than anything, he couldn’t imagine a life better than the one he lived now.

nothing good can last forever, and the worst part is that rumor doesn’t even know why. he just remembers waking up in the middle of the night to his sister shaking him awaking, rushing her words as she picked him up and took him to the cop car waiting for them in their front yard. she held him close as they drove into town and to the police station, and continued to hold him as he cried in her arms asking why they were there and what was wrong. they were there until sunrise when his aunt finally made it, taking verity and rumor with the news they’d be living with her now and that they’d never see that farm again

going from his quaint life in the country to a town, even a small one, was shocking to rumor. his usual routine now interrupted by an actual school, no more running around rather he was expected to sit in a desk all day with very few reprieves. at home he was always confident, outgoing, always had something to say. here he was terrified to speak, never being around other kids or knowing how to act around them. he sat in the back with his head down, dutifully taking notes on his own. it wasn’t until lunch when one student gave him a chance that the boy he always was came out. all the students crowded around him to meet the new kid, and he was so excited to talk to all of them. tell them about himself, the farm, the stories he made up and games he’d play. his happiness was quickly crushed as he was responded to with laughter. to his peers he was a freak, a weirdo with an equally weird name. that was the first time rumor chastain learned to change himself, hide certain parts to fit in. it was only a matter of time before hiding simply became erasing those parts of himself, unable to get back that full shine he once had.

his sister had dropped out of high school and gotten multiple jobs instead, saving her money in the short time they lived with their aunt. the minute she got enough money she bought them a little trailer barely able to fit the two of them and they left. it wasn’t because of anything their aunt did, they love her dearly and thank her for everything she did to help them, but they just weren’t meant for a life like that. rumor wasn’t at least, because as much as he loved to learn he hated the constraint of the classroom. he knew how smart he was, too smart for the pace most classes took. verity and rumor were always on the road, always moving, his sister finding odd jobs wherever she could. most of the time he was self taught, only going to actual schools when they stayed in one place longer than most. even then he barely went, preferring to be on his own and go at his own pace.

once he was old enough to get a job he did, wanting to do anything to help his sister out after everything she had done and given up for him. it was the least he could do, and he only hoped that one day he could do more. he graduated high school early and took some time off to keep working and be with his sister. he wanted more than anything to go to college but he was scared of leaving, crippled by the drastic change he went through as a child (and learned not to ask about) that left him terrified of any other form of change.

over the summers they’d go back to visit their aunt and spend their summers at camp reverie, it was his sisters summer job and with her working there they’d allow rumor to be a camper. while he usually kept to himself due to his shyness he loved being there, it was the only time he really felt like a kid even if most of the other kids scared him. when he got old enough he applied to work there as well, this being his first year being at camp not as a camper but as an employee.

personality & headcanons:

the thing two most important things i didn’t mention about rumor above are 1. his love for poetry and desire to be a poet and 2. how much of a hopeless romantic he is

rumor always loved literature but poetry owned his heart. ever since he was a kid and his mother would read him poets to go to sleep he tried to write some of his own, developing his own style over the years and finding a passion for it. he’d often visit bookstores and read whole collections of poetry while there, knowing he couldn’t afford to buy them so he memorized them instead. because of this he’s that guy who quotes poetry randomly.

rumor loves love. his entire life has been looking for love, creating this idealized version of his soulmate in his mind. love is truly the driving factor in his life, and he’d do anything for those he loves (romantically and platonically) almost to a fault or dangerous point. when it comes to romantic love he is the type to go all in, full romeo and juliet kind of guy. he wants a love to overwhelm and take over his entire life, but he puts too much pressure on this idealized love that is virtually impossible to obtain.

despite all he has gone through and how he isn’t nearly as happy and bright as he was as a child, he still tries to hold onto that happiness and optimism he once had. he sometimes struggles to do so, but he tries his hardest to keep his dreams alive and keep a smile on his face.

one of his biggest vices is that he smokes cigarettes. he’s minorly addicted and picked it up when he was around 15, and it’s become a kind of nervous tick for him to immediately start smoking once anything makes him anxious. despite this he doesn’t really drink, that’s reserved for when he’s especially sad and wants to get drunk on his own. 

he’s just really sweet okay, he’s not the biggest social butterfly but he is social enough to have friends and he’s legit nice to everyone. it’s hard to find a mean bone in his body. he’s a bit of a wallflower though since he legit has never really had a friend outside of his sister and has never gone to a party or anything like that so this is all new to him.

wc’s:

some people he’s possibly known from camp in the past years hes gone, whether it’s good or bad connections !!

someone to corrupt him (though for him that’s so tame), he’s never been to a party or been in a setting like this with the opportunity to get black out drunk or smoke with other people around his age so i’d love someone who kinda guides him through that

through that i’d love him to kinda get corrupted and become a lil stoner and have a lil stoner crew 

[angel-ranger]

for the cute asks can you do all of them? i saw you do it before but if you cant pick out your favorite ones

you’re in luck, I somehow have nothing to do! ever! (I had some other asks but then I got this one and figured I’d do them all in one).

1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk?

I try to have more cereal than milk but I always end up with more milk than cereal, which is fine ‘cause I like milk.

2: do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day?

love it!

3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books?

receipts or random scraps of paper.

4: how do you take your coffee/tea?

milk with two sugars for both.

5: are you self-conscious of your smile?

oh, definitely.

6: do you keep plants?

I can barely keep myself, so no.

7: do you name your plants?

my housemate named a plant jessica. I think I’d name one goliath.

8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings?

does making spotify playlists count? (I also do some writing and poetry).

9: do you like singing/humming to yourself?

yeah!

10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach?

side.

11: what’s an inner joke you have with your friends?

ham rolls.

12: what’s your favorite planet?

saturn.

13: what’s something that made you smile today?

I got to see all of my grandparents doing food deliveries. it was really nice.

14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like?

open plan kitchen and living room, maybe a counter to have a little separation? big couch! there will be a nintendo wii! lots of ikea furniture, lmao, and light but not overbearing colours.

15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is!

there's floating water in space!

16: what’s your favorite pasta dish?

spaghetti.

17: what color do you really want to dye your hair?

I’d like to dye the rest of it purple but I have been informed that is unwise. maybe blue!

18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up.

fell down some icy stairs once when I was very drunk with my hands full of: my phone, a mcdonald’s, and a coffee, and I didn’t drop a thing! until I got home.

19: do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it?

nope.

20: what’s your favorite eye color?

Hazel? I’m not overly fussed.

21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that’s been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces.

I… don’t have a favourite bag??

22: are you a morning person?

Sometimes, it depends on how my sleeping pattern is going. I can be.

23: what’s your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations?

literally do nothing. Just chill out in bed watching films.

24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets?

no.

25: what’s the weirdest place you’ve ever broken into?

I’ve done a lot of accidental trespassing onto farms #countrysidelyfe.

26: what are the shoes you’ve had for forever and wear with every single outfit?

I always buy tan boots.

27: what’s your favorite bubblegum flavor?

apple.

28: sunrise or sunset?

sunset.

29: what’s something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing?

ramble.

30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared?

Yes. don’t even have to think very hard.

31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks.

I love socks! possibly my favourite article of clothing. I buy colourful socks, patterned socks white socks, black socks, ankle socks, trainer socks, knee high socks, socks you can’t see. I just love socks.

32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends.

there was a bird. in my bathroom. I was not sober in many ways. the trauma lives on.

33: what’s your fave pastry?

sausage rolls.

34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it?

I had one of those monkeys that had velcro on its hands so you could wrap it around your shoulders like a cape. he was called stanley after the cartoon and i still have him.

35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often?

I like them but i rarely use them.

36: which band’s sound would fit your mood right now?

right now? the wallows, perhaps.

37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean?

clean. tidy room tidy mind.

38: tell us about your pet peeves!

I don’t like loud chewing or gulping. “well, actually…”. men who can’t take instruction from a woman in charge. leaving doors open.

39: what color do you wear the most?

muted ones, blues, beiges, pinks, some white, grey, and black.

40: think of a piece of jewelry you own: what’s it’s story? does it have any meaning to you?

I have a star necklace that my mum gave me. It has meaning but I would like to keep that to myself.

41: what’s the last book you remember really, really loving?

The Princess Diarist by Carrie Fisher.

42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it!

not really.

43: who was the last person you gazed at the stars with?

God, a handful of people from camp, we just lay on some bleachers one night and had a lil gossip session under the stars.

44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything?

?

45: do you trust your instincts a lot?

Uhhhhh, most times.

46: tell us the worst pun you can think of.

I’ll have to give that question a good old punder as I have too many.

47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe?

chewy yoghurt! no!

48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today?

the weeping angels from doctor who and the dark. I’m still scared of the dark.

49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought?

I love buying records! the last one I actually bought for myself was either fleetwood mac or kacey musgraves, I can’t remember.

50: what’s an odd thing you collect?

I means, I collect coins and pop vinyls but they’re not really odd.

51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them?

my best friend: ‘last resort’ by papa roach.

52: what are your favorite memes of the year so far?

the gossip girl meme, hands down.

53: have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them?

yes. no. no.yes; great. idk. idk. eh.

54: who’s the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face?

My gramps earlier today.

55: what’s the most dramatic thing you’ve ever done to prove a point?

you’re going to have to be more specific. I do a lot of dramatic things.

56: what are some things you find endearing in people?

laughter, any odd quirks, rambling, how they talk about things they love, how they take their tea/coffee, reasons for things they hate.

57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics?

felt like i went on a journey, as always. who doesn’t dramatically reenact the lyrics? either you’re that scene from wayne’s world or you’re doing it wrong.

58: who’s the wine mom and who’s the vodka aunt in your group of friends? Why?

I’m the vodka aunt. in fact we’re all vodka aunts, it’s a mess. help.

59: what’s your favorite myth?

any one of the mabinogi, to be honest. branwen and blodeuwedd are classics, though.

60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves?

I like it but i don’t read it much.

61: what’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? the stupidest one you’ve ever received?

I got my gramps, who does some birdwatching, a mug with fake bird poop on it.

62: do you drink juice in the morning? which kind?

Not really, but if I did it would either be orange or apple and mango.

63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be?

I put my books in size order and then alphabetise my music by last names.

64: what color is the sky where you are right now?

pretty grey, though some blue is peeking through.

65: is there anyone you haven’t seen in a long time who you’d love to hang out with?

bitch we’re in lockdown, of course.

66: what would your ideal flower crown look like?

thorny.

67: how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel?

melancholic.

68: what’s winter like where you live?

cold and wet, sometimes there’s snow.

69: what are your favorite board games?

monopoly and articulate.

70: have you ever used a ouija board?

no, but I would like to!

71: what’s your favorite kind of tea?

breakfast tea or peach iced tea.

72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you’ll forget it?

yup.

73: what are some of your worst habits?

leaving things until the last minute. being judgmental. eating and drinking junk. not listening. my stubbornness and need to be right. not doing the things i enjoy. giving up if i don’t get it right on the first try.

74: describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns.

they’re a good person at heart, we have gone through so many arguments and friendship break ups and distance but we’ve since grown up and always make time for each other, even if it’s just going for a drive. we actually have good chats about everything and nothing and have a healthy respect for each other, but we;re not afraid to call out bad behaviour in each other.

75: tell us about your pets!

big ball of energy! he’s a greedy guts who stole my pizza three weeks ago and i’m not over it! he’s fifteen and a half but you’d think he was younger and he’s one of my best friends and i love him. hims stinky though. 

76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren’t?

If the circumstances were normal i’d be starting my summer job right about now.

77: pink or yellow lemonade?

to drink? yellow. to write about? pink. iykyk.

78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub?

no club.

79: what’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you?

I loathe to think about them but my old flatmates had decorated our flat with a bunch of bunting and balloons and surprised me on my birthday two years ago.

80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why?

blue. yes. I like blue.

81: describe one of your friend’s eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of.

ice glacier.

82: are/were you good in school?

I was good in school. I am now struggling to even be mediocre.

83: what’s some of your favorite album art?

You ruined new york city for me by fletcher, dirty computer by janelle monae, and melodrama by lorde.

84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones?

i’m planning on getting a giraffe and a spider-gwen themed one.

85: do you read comics? what are your faves?

yeah! I like most spider-man variations (miles and gwen’s being favourites), fantastic four, wonder woman, and more recently captain marvel.

86: do you like concept albums? which ones?

I love dirty computer (shoutout again to janelle’s artistry).

87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives?

power rangers 2017.

88: are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy?

I like surrealism and photorealism, and perhaps some fauvism.

89: are you close to your parents?

I’m close with my mum.

90: talk about one of your favorite cities.

i have a favourite memory attached to paris. my friend and I had taken a mini roadtrip and on our way back we accidentally ended up in paris? (we were trying to avoid it because of emissions laws) we didn’t realise until we saw the eiffel tower lit up in the distance so we decided to ride it out and put paris by the chainsmokers on. lmao. so by association its now one of my favourite cities.

91: where do you plan on traveling this year?

Hahahahahahaha. florida next year.

92: are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch?

depends on the pasta, I am both.

93: what’s the hairstyle you wear the most?

either straightened or in a low bun with some bangs.

94: who was the last person you know to have a birthday?

my oldest sister.

95: what are your plans for this weekend?

nothing.

96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot?

procrastinate them a lot. like, a lot a lot.

97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house?

intj, taurus, all of them at this point (gryffinclaw)

98: when’s the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it?

no idea.

99: list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them.

hypersonic missiles by sam fender, strangers by fletcher, promises by naomi scott, hello my loneliness by delaney jane, cry baby by the neighbourhood.

100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? Why?

time doesn’t exist.

[daylightdreamt]

hello everyone, i’m karina and i’m so hyped to be here and bring my baby rumor to life !! i can’t wait to get to know all of you and your lovely muses and see how everything goes down here !! like this if you want to plot and i’ll hit u up !! mwah

if you want his annoyingly long full ass bio you can read it here !!

also his pinterest board is here !!

backstory: 

rumor chastain was an accident in his family - but that doesn’t mean he was unwanted. his parents, delilah and benjamin, were more than happy to have another child after their daughter verity (who was around ten when rumor was born).

the chastain family lived on a farm in the countryside, far from the nearest town and no neighbors in sight. just the four of them and their lovely house, along with all the animals rumor affectionately named and cared for. being the baby of the family his parents ensured he took that role, never giving him any big responsibilities on the farm and rather letting him roam about as he pleased. he was a happy child, and he loved his life. he did his chores early in the morning so he could run out and see the sunrise, spend the rest of his day running up and down the hills picking flowers and finding figures in the clouds. he’d stay out there until the sunset, counting every new star in the sky until there were too many, and only coming home once his mother called him down for dinner. 

when he was old enough for school he was homeschooled along his sister verity, who taught him his abcs and how to read while teaching herself geometry. they were isolated in their country home, but rumor didn’t mind, he had everything he needed. his family was his best friends, and their property seemed like the whole wide world to him. he loved that farm more than anything, he couldn’t imagine a life better than the one he lived now. 

nothing good can last forever, and the worst part is that rumor doesn’t even know why. he just remembers waking up in the middle of the night to his sister shaking him awaking, rushing her words as she picked him up and took him to the cop car waiting for them in their front yard. she held him close as they drove into town and to the police station, and continued to hold him as he cried in her arms asking why they were there and what was wrong. they were there until sunrise when his aunt finally made it, taking verity and rumor with the news they’d be living with her now and that they’d never see that farm again

going from his quaint life in the country to a town, even a small one, was shocking to rumor. his usual routine now interrupted by an actual school, no more running around rather he was expected to sit in a desk all day with very few reprieves. at home he was always confident, outgoing, always had something to say. here he was terrified to speak, never being around other kids or knowing how to act around them. he sat in the back with his head down, dutifully taking notes on his own. it wasn’t until lunch when one student gave him a chance that the boy he always was came out. all the students crowded around him to meet the new kid, and he was so excited to talk to all of them. tell them about himself, the farm, the stories he made up and games he’d play. his happiness was quickly crushed as he was responded to with laughter. to his peers he was a freak, a weirdo with an equally weird name. that was the first time rumor chastain learned to change himself, hide certain parts to fit in. it was only a matter of time before hiding simply became erasing those parts of himself, unable to get back that full shine he once had.

his sister had dropped out of high school and gotten multiple jobs instead, saving her money in the short time they lived with their aunt. the minute she got enough money she bought them a little trailer barely able to fit the two of them and they left. it wasn’t because of anything their aunt did, they love her dearly and thank her for everything she did to help them, but they just weren’t meant for a life like that. rumor wasn’t at least, because as much as he loved to learn he hated the constraint of the classroom. he knew how smart he was, too smart for the pace most classes took. verity and rumor were always on the road, always moving, his sister finding odd jobs wherever she could. most of the time he was self taught, only going to actual schools when they stayed in one place longer than most. even then he barely went, preferring to be on his own and go at his own pace.

once he was old enough to get a job he did, wanting to do anything to help his sister out after everything she had done and given up for him. it was the least he could do, and he only hoped that one day he could do more. he graduated high school early and took some time off to keep working and be with his sister. he wanted more than anything to go to college but he was scared of leaving, crippled by the drastic change he went through as a child (and learned not to ask about) that left him terrified of any other form of change. he eventually had to get over that and leave for college, going to covington a dream for him, even if he did cry every night the first week he was there. everything was perfect there. his peers made him feel welcomed, his classes challenged him, and he even had the perfect girlfriend. it finally felt like his life was getting back on track.

personality & headcanons:

the thing two most important things i didn’t mention about rumor above are 1. his love for poetry and desire to be a poet and 2. how much of a hopeless romantic he is

rumor always loved literature but poetry owned his heart. ever since he was a kid and his mother would read him poets to go to sleep he tried to write some of his own, developing his own style over the years and finding a passion for it. he’d often visit bookstores and read whole collections of poetry while there, knowing he couldn’t afford to buy them so he memorized them instead. because of this he’s that guy who quotes poetry randomly.

rumor loves love. his entire life has been looking for love, creating this idealized version of his soulmate in his mind. love is truly the driving factor in his life, and he’d do anything for those he loves (romantically and platonically) almost to a fault or dangerous point. when it comes to romantic love he is the type to go all in, full romeo and juliet kind of guy. he wants a love to overwhelm and take over his entire life, but he puts too much pressure on this idealized love that is virtually impossible to obtain.

despite all he has gone through and how he isn’t nearly as happy and bright as he was as a child, he still tries to hold onto that happiness and optimism he once had. he sometimes struggles to do so, but he tries his hardest to keep his dreams alive and keep a smile on his face.

one of his biggest vices is that he smokes cigarettes. he’s minorly addicted and picked it up when he was around 15, and it’s become a kind of nervous tick for him to immediately start smoking once anything makes him anxious. despite this he doesn’t really drink, that’s reserved for when he’s especially sad and wants to get drunk on his own. he isn’t a big party guy but when he does go out and doesn’t want to stay sober then he’ll smoke some weed.

he’s just really sweet okay, he’s not the biggest social butterfly but he is social enough to have friends and he’s legit nice to everyone. it’s hard to find a mean bone in his body. at parties he’s a bit of a wallflower though since he legit never went to a single party until he got to covington and baby doesn’t know how to act.

rumor dresses like a writer guy like he’s the type always in autumn clothes and colors, sweaters and turtlenecks, etc.

melanie:

melanie, melanie, melanie...let’s make this quick. melanie and rumor were the picture perfect couple. they knew just how to be pda enough for everyone to know how cute they were without going over the top and grossing everyone out. they matched each other intellectually, and the best part was that melanie was the girl rumor had always dreamed about. she was the girl of his dreams, the ideal partner all his poems were about and yet...he never fell in love with her. he never did and he doesn’t think he ever could and he doesn’t know why. she was perfect, they were perfect, but there just wasn’t that thing that made it different. they didn’t have that passion, that moxie that every great couple had. he wanted a love that he couldn’t stand to live without, and he just didn’t have that with melanie. he never had the guts to break up with her, and now he didn’t need to.

wc’s: 

listen i’m shit with pre wc so here’s some basics

roommates !! ones who get along or don’t either way is fun

friends !! likely ones, unlikely ones, bad influences, ex friends, etc

lil stoner group cuz like he ain’t a full stoner but sometimes he needs that good good shit and needs his lil stoner friends he can call up and smoke up with

[heartcrypt-blog]

☕ . ˚ ◝ ( kim jisoo. cisfemale. she/her. ) vanessa yun is a twenty-four year old scorpio. the wedding planner’s go-to order is an almond milk macchiato. they like to listen to rhiannon by fleetwood mac while they wait for their order. the employees of the deja brew think they are disenchanted but swear they’re totally genuine as well. maybe that’s why empty champagne flutes, bitter smiles and pencil skirts remind me of them. 

hey there babyluvs! i’m pleased to be here to write with you all ^-^ i’m honestly so terrible at intros but we’re going to get through this together okay?? i’ll start by giving you a little bit of info on my cynical lil wilted flower over here <3 vanessa was born to a single mom and aspiring broadway performer in downtown buffalo, new york. she loved the city even as a child, and would often tag along with her mom wherever she went. the two were the best of friends, which sometimes came at the expense of her mother being the responsible adult. vanessa was sometimes even more detail-oriented than her mother, which led to her being something of a miniature assistant. after watching some of the plays her mother was in, as well as others, vanessa became obsessed with the idea of love. her mother had a collection of recorded productions, many of them deeply romantic tales. vanessa was hooked on the idealistic belief that love was a perfect, momentous occasion that always included fireworks and whimsical songs and people dancing in the streets. her mother enabled these fantasies of the perfect love story, filling vanessa’s head with the idea that relationships were all about a quick, sudden feeling that you needed to act on immediately rather than an obstacle-filled journey that could be just as painful as it could beautiful. her naivete about the subject led to her becoming a bit of a serial dater in high school. she was on the hunt for a perfect love story, after all. she was convinced that she’d know it no sooner than things got started, so none of her relationships lasted very long. it led to some unsavory rumors about her among some of the students, but she was confident that she knew what she was doing. in her sophomore year, she simply knew she had met the one. he had the most exquisite eyes and heartrending smile; he knew all the right things to say, and he’d brushed off the rumors about her from the very beginning. he kissed her like she was the only person he’d ever care about, and vanessa was swept away in the feeling. it was the breathless kind of romance she’d always yearned for. the two were inseparable for the remainder of high school, and even got engaged before heading off to separate colleges. vanessa’s love of romance and eye for detail led her down the wedding planning path at new york university, while her beau was attending his father’s alma mater in wisconsin. even though they’d mostly be apart for four years, she knew they’d stand the test of time and distance. during her time at nyu, vanessa made a fairly good friend who seemed to share her hopeless romantic nature. the two talked often over coffee, and even had crappy rom com marathons together. meanwhile, her fiance seemed to begin distancing himself from her. he began calling much less often, and even ignoring her own calls. and when she actually could get in touch with him, there always seemed to be voices in the background that he was hell bent on her not hearing. deep down, she knew things were headed for disaster, but her dedication to the man of her dreams kept her hopes up. still though, the friend she’d made in college whom she had so much in common with...she couldn’t deny that feelings were starting to form there. they spent far too much time together and liked each other far too much for there not to be feelings. things nearly came to a head several times between them, but she couldn’t stray. after graduation, it finally came time for the wedding vanessa had spent her entire life planning. she knew going into it that she had feelings for someone else, and that her fiance was likely cheating on her, but she still intended to walk down the aisle, head held high. her stomach full of butterflies, she did so, walking towards the man who had a smarmy grin on his face. a man she knew once, or maybe she never had. maybe she had just been blinded by her obsession with love. either way, as their vows began, vanessa couldn’t shake off a feeling of impropriety. that’s when she heard it; the double doors to the front of the church opening. it was him, her friend from college. “i don’t know if you’ve gotten to the objection part, but i object,” he muttered to the priest, out of breath. once again, vanessa’s heart was made new. it was as if a scene from a movie had played out in her very own life. maybe love didn’t deserve the doubts she’d started to cast on it. after all, the man she really loved had just saved her from making a huge mistake, had he not? the two star-crossed lovers fled the church in a hurry, fingers intertwined, dodging pedestrians on the sidewalk as they laughed together. it was perfect; everything she had ever wanted. this type of love could never come with a hefty price tag...could it? the first few months were like a honeymoon at sunset that simply wouldn’t end. champagne on a hotel balcony, making love in the back seat, revealing secrets in shy whispers. it filled vanessa’s head with dreams and sanguine thoughts, even though she’d been burned once before. she found work with an event planning agency, filling her days with wedding details, consultations, cake tastings and dress fittings. even though her own wedding hadn’t exactly gone off without a hitch, she still adored the festivities and loved the thought of giving other people their perfect day. and when she got home at the end of the day, she’d get to spend time with the love of her life. things were going absolutely amazing. he couldn’t have been more supportive of her career, always encouraging her to go out with her coworkers more to improve relations, or work longer hours in order to gain her boss’ respect. she was so appreciative, she was determined to repay him. knocking off early for lunch one day, she prepared him a romantic picnic. certainly something she stole from a movie, but she knew he’d enjoy it nonetheless. they were both corny like that. she arrived home at noon, picnic basket adorned with fresh flowers in hand, ready to surprise him. she was the one who got the big surprise however, as after she covertly unlocked the door, she was met with the sight of an unknown female getting very familiar with the man she’d credited with healing her heart after her fiance’s betrayal. the woman’s fingertips were on the bare chest that vanessa herself had touched lovingly just the night before. she couldn’t speak, she couldn’t cry, she couldn’t even breathe; anger was too busy sweeping its way through her blood. even as he hurled excuse after excuse at her, trying to make himself seem blameless, vanessa’s eyes burned red. she was devastated, she was filled with utter rage, and she simply didn’t know what to do. the raw pain of yet another failed relationship that she’d staked everything on was almost too much to bear. love wasn’t a beautiful miracle; it was an ugly, manipulative trap made for certain people to get what they wanted and for everyone else to be left ravaged by it. a bitterness grew in her like twisting vines, and the longer she stayed in new york, the more she felt suffocated by them. her aimlessness carried her to california, as it was a great breadth away from her problems, and that was exactly where she wanted to be. she still works as a wedding planner, albeit one with a much more matter-of-fact and uninspired take on things. the happiness surrounding them almost makes her sick now, but it pays the bills, and it’s the only trade she really studied for. she looks at love much differently; she almost pities the people who experience it. her jaded outlook has driven her clientele down considerably, but vanessa simply can’t bring herself to feel the hope that she once did. she does’t really want to accept that her own attitude towards love in the first place is what got her into trouble. her trying to idealize every facet of romance made her unable to deal with the slightest disappointment. as afraid of love as she is, she’s even more afraid of confronting herself. wanted connections; best friend - the one person who can be real with vanessa and call her a dumb bitch when she needs to hear it (which is often). they know her an uncomfortable amount and can call her out when need be. still they both luff each other and hang out pretty much all the time. no strings - while vanessa may hate love now, that doesn’t mean she hates instant gratification. this little connection *chef’s kiss* is really gonna test her on the whole ‘how about you don’t fall for someone just bcuz they’re attractive and nice to you for five minutes??’ thing. lots of sarcastic banter, flirting in the form of constantly roasting each other and drunk 3am booty calls. what’s not to love like? therapy friend - at the behest of her best friend connection, vanessa has started tentatively attending therapy sessions. she doesn’t go that frequently, as she’s not all that comfortable with it yet, but she has at least made a friend there. this is basically someone else who has sessions at the same therapist, and they just started conversing in the waiting room, eventually striking up a friendship. maybe they even have coffee at a certain place sometimes?? leftover buddy - this is the person who is always calling dibs on vanessa’s catering leftovers from weddings. she brings them by whenever she can in some cute lil decorative containers, and the two get a chance to catch up when she does! employee of the month - i’d love for vanessa to have a favorite deja brew employee! just that one person who always makes her order just right and always greets her with a smile and a friendly hello in the way she needs, especially in the morning, since she’s such a bitter grouch. this alsdkfjgh isn’t much, but i’d also love to take on some of the plots you guys have available! we can also brainstorm something from scratch of course ^^ feel free to like my shmatus and i’ll come see what’s up in your ims!

[dcmiiniic]

hi, it me, mini from the block --- bringing you another muse, and he is my lil bb. also @maddisvn’s brother bc i love lia. so uh, read the intro (srry if its a bit long), like this and I WILL mssge you for plots and threads. the messier the better, bc im a messy biiih. ily.

❛ new york’s very own Dominic Parker was spotted on broadway street in  Off-White White 3.0 Off-Court Sneakers. your resemblance to Reece King is unreal. according to tmz, you just had your twenty third birthday bash. while living in new york, you’ve been labeled as being impatient, but also idealistic. i guess being a sagittarius explains that. three things that would paint a better picture of you would be reading a book by the beach, torn up runners, and neon highlighters & ( cismale & he/him )

Basic Information

Full Name: Dominic Omar Parker

Nickname(s): d, dom

Age: 23

Date of Birth: December 20th 1995

Zodiac sign: sagittarius

Hogwarts house: ravenclaw

Ethnicity: african-american/white

Nationality: american

Gender: cis male

Pronouns: he/him

Orientation: bisexual

Religion: agnostic

Language(s) Spoken: english 

Accent: american

Favourites

Weather: summer

Colour: green

Music: logic, big sean, etc.

Movies: the lion king

Sport: track + field, basketball

Beverage: hennessy or red label

Food: doubles! and plantains with cheese.

Animal: sea lions + turtles

Family

Father: henderson parker

Mother: cassandra parker

Sibling(s): maddison parker + older bro (WC)

Children:  aaliyah strawberry parker, 1 yr. (stormi webster fc)

Pet(s): a turtle named franklin

BIOGRAPHY

dominic grew up in san francisco, california. his favorite thing growing up was hanging out at pier 39 and just watching the sea lions chill all day on top of the boards. regardless of the smell. he loved the fact that it didn’t rain or snow, the weather was just ideal. it allowed him to thrive when things were constant with minor changes.

dominic feels most at home by the ocean. he finds it peaceful since it’s calm and quiet besides the sounds of the water crashing together.

@ 15, dominic and the rest of the parkers moved over to NYC cos their dad got a job there and tb he hated it. 

he had to be the new kid, at a new school, in a new city but, dominic is the type of person to blend in so making a whole new life barely came with challenges. he was able to work a room, and he was smart to figure things out easily. 

he made a lot of friends, went to the randomest of parties, all while maintaining a high average in school and keeping A1 appearances.

FAMILY

since the parkers were well off, dominic didn’t have to work for anything when it came to getting things he wanted - but what he did have to work for was getting his father’s approval on almost every part of his life.

being one of the only two boys, there was a lot riding on them to do things. going to school, getting the best grades, making sure you’re always presentable - and bc dominic just wanted to please his dad, he did everything he could. he studied a lot, he did a lot of volunteer work and thankfully for him he liked to study, so studying a lot wasn’t a problem.

dominic rlly struggled being the middle child, but don’t get him wrong, he loves his siblings. believe it or not, he still loves his dad, and he’s a big time momma’s boy. 

even while his dad talks a lot of smack about him, dominic still attends family events, dinners and the works, to please his dad and so it wouldn’t be stressful on his mom. 

CAREER 

dominic is a nerd, a smartass. his grades were always high, especially when it came to liberal arts.

it wasn’t really his choice if he went into university, it was expected. dominic didn’t think much of it besides that he had to do it. 

he went to columbia university for law, and he got his degree in that, and he was doing his graduate legal studies until he got scouted by the New York Knicks.

he grew up with a lot of stress riding on his back, and being the middle child really sucked when you had to have as much of responsibility as the oldest, still be looked at as the younger sibling but at the same time having to take care of the youngest. 

what he did on his past time was run. whether it was around the block, or around the track, dominic found it peaceful just to be by himself where his heart rate went up to the point he couldn’t breathe and he’d fall onto the ground. years of doing so earned him a spot on the track + field team, and because he was good at it, his dad put him in on basketball teams since he was fast enough to make home runs - multiple times.

Basketball was never his first choice at anything, if he could, dominic would do track and field but as far as his dad was concerned, basketball was the better path between the two. so that’s what he did to please his dad. 

dropping out of columbia though, that was dominic’s choice. he figured, he already got his degree, his masters could be put on hold while he played basketball. 

it seemed like a good idea to him, but since then he has a pretty rocky relationship with his dad.

he was never meant to be the black sheep of the family. he was supposed to have this picture perfect image, probably be the next Barack Obama - but that didn’t work out. 

Being an athlete wasn’t the same as being an academic. it took a lot of work physically, and at the end of the games he was left with such a rush. it was a completely different kind of satisfaction.

PERSONAL LIFE

for once dominic didn’t have to worry about hitting the books or the next test. his main focus was basketball and keeping an image that was easier to maintain. this came with a lot of partying and a lot of - accidents.

one night, when he was too drunk to function, he woke up the next day in a random girl’s bed. not that that was anything special but it definitely was when he got a call saying she was pregnant. so 9 months later, aaliyah strawberry parker came into this world. she is currently 1 year and a few months, and that little babe added a light into dominic’s life. 

he was never prepared to be a dad DILF, but he’s a damn good one! he keeps his life separate when he’s with his daughter.

he’s not with his baby momma, but they have a solid relationship, sometimes rocky, sometimes not but y’know. it happens. 

so far, dominic hasn’t introduce aaliyah to any of his family members except maddison. it’s not a secret, it’s just something he doesn’t want to do considering the rocky relationship he has with his dad. 

currently, besides being a baskeball player and a dad, dominic is just figuring things out as he goes. he loves to read, and paint, and sometimes when he’s bored he’ll take a class on something just to feel mentally stimulated. 

he’s always curious, and loves to travel to wherever he can. 

he’s a mfng fuckboy. just bcos he had a kid, doesn’t mean it’s gonna stop him from messing around. he’s just extra careful with it. 

even tho he’s not talking with his dad, and he’s doing his own thing, he rlly still hopes in a way he’s making his dad proud. 

he gets emo sometimes bc he didn’t turn out the way his parents wanted him to, and cos he doesn’t have the best relationship with them - but that’s why, at the very least he has close friends and siblings. 

he lives by himself in a fairly decent apartment with his turtle that he named franklin, bc he can’t own a sea lion. 

PERSONALITY

dominic is always fun. he was the one in the group of friends that made the jokes, and made everyone feel comfortable. he was always out there hugging his friends and chilling, laying around.

this was the guy that brought a textbook to a party bc he wanted to get lit but also had a test the next day to study for.

he’s been given so many expectations his whole life, he really doesn’t like it now. he just wants to be free and do his own thing.

he cares a lot about people, sometimes he’s too nice and doesn’t see the way it’ll back fire on him.

he’s smart in a lot of other ways. take him to a museum and it’s like returning an alien to the mothership. 

he believes in positive thinking, his mind is always open, and is never one to judge - or he tries not to judge bc he grew up judging other people that he doesn’t want to do that anymore.

he loves to be outdoors and walking around barefoot on the grass. 

a lot of things come easy to him. he’s sociable and charming, and loves adventure.

WANTED CONNECTIONS 

some connections based off of muse posts :)

one

two

three

four

five

six

seven

eight

nine

ten

besides that, i’m down for anything !

unrequited connections

toxic relationship/friendship

brotps

give me a SQUAD

first loves

childhood friendships

sibling type friendships

exes on good and bad terms

all the fwb~ 

creative type friends

enemies plots pls

crossword puzzle friends pls

[fidelcastrato]

Saturday Night Dead

A dull roar floods a small, derelict house and about a block of surrounding land all of a sudden, followed shortly by a piercing screech which acts as the conditioned stimulus to roughly 30-40 people between the ages of probably around 15 at the youngest, up to pushing-40, causing a mass salivation in response to the promise of real, proletariat, bullshit-free Punk Fucking Rawk™. Brando Murely himself sits on a cinder block outside the door, just enough out of the way of the crowd distractedly making its way inside, everyone in the middle of a conversation, turning around every few seconds to give their latest opinion on the eternal IHOP v. Waffle House crisis, shouting-match phone calls, drunken wobbling, stoned hobbling, and oh-that-sweet-cocaine's-a-calling. From Brando's arm dangles eazily-breezily a small bucket, perhaps formerly housing some domesticated plant, with the word "DONATIONS" written in sharpie on the side. He is only a few brainwaves away from REM sleep, that sultry temptress.

Avey and Fyo take their sweet time. The openers are about to play, now sound-checking, if you can really call it that (not to be rude, but the opening acts of these kinda shows were more often than not either local upstarts or local failures, and lacked some level of expertise in regards to acoustics, dynamics, levels and such), but they have both just lit a new cigarette. No worries, though; they've been around enough that they know the path straight to the front, if it should turn out that The Ushi Onis were worth front row listening.

Towards the back of the house stood in solidarity the introverts so in love with music, but so out of touch with people, the old farts who didn't really care anymore but still attended out of habit, the few (if extant) devout fans of another band on the line-up who just wanted to get it over with already, and the stray college kid; not any art or philosophy major, no, just some regular Joe (and hilariously enough, one independent study in "Crime and Punkishment", a locally famous zine, reported that 73.7% of these people were actually named Joe) who happened upon this utterly obscene proceeding via a stack of coincidence and misfortune--maybe they were there with some punk ladyfriend from class.

In the middle, by far the largest section, you could find pretty much anybody from anywhere. Regulars who still hear the heartbeat of the scene, newcomers enthusiastic but not enthusiastic enough to put themselves out for judgement if they happened to accidentally nod their heads a bit with the music (mortified.....), and that strange demographic that seemed to place itself starkly in the middle of all the aforementioned alignments; middle-of-the-roaders through and through, to the point where they have risen above the road, and the ideal of the road, and smugly glance at one another and then down to you as if to imply a transcendence which those of us who have ever experienced anything in extreme can never know of.

Front and center, ears blasted to bits and facial muscles entering anaerobic respiration due to excessive smiling, the All-Stars of the scene danced alongside strangers, either naïve or drunk. The frontmen of the most famous local bands, the influencers, both silent and megaphonic, the photographers, the beauties, the hype-builders, the next band, the people who arranged this show in the first place, all of them stood in almost equal amounts of admiration as the performing act themselves. The rich and famous of the DIY; the proletariat bourgeoisie; the broke stock brokers; the soothsayers and the fortune tellers; basically, the people you want to know.

"Hey, let's make a film tomorrow" says Fyo.

"About what?" from Avey.

"Who cares? Let's climb that billboard at the top of the hill. Let's hop on a train and record the city from like, some weird dutch angle, or something. Let's see how many cats can fit in one box."

"We could never find enough cats for that. All of our friends have like two cats at least, including me, and that still wouldn't be close to enough."

"Let's give the camera some 4-aco-dmt and see what happens."

"Easy on the Adderall, bub."

Fyo had a pretty publicly-known problem with stimulants, which he was recently combatting with a burgeoning benzodiazepine habit. Avey's personal dog hair was Kratom. Both of them partook in casual use of just about every recreational substance at this point, always especially eager to try something new. They still more or less had a handle on their sanity, but not without their eccentricities. Both had a deep love for consumption and creation of art, primarily music; between them they owned a veritable arsenal of digital and analog synthesizers, samplers, ancient MIDI keyboards, melodicas, and various novelty instruments collected over the years. Each had their own individual recording endeavors, as well as a joint operation making full use of their combined setup. They had played shows, Fyo more than Avey on account of having played in front of various kinds of audiences since the age of 15, from dull high school jazz band performances to the exact kind of venue they found themselves at tonight--in fact he'd played at this house several times already in the past year. “Holy House”, one of the few legit punk houses remaining in the city after a long string of misfortunes over the past two years lead to some places being shut down, others burning down, some simply forgotten about, living on only in the ink of flyers taped to the walls of just about every DIY art kid in the area--it was kind of like collecting baseball cards. Avey had played a couple of the more fleeting art spots once or twice, but was generally overcome with anxiety at the last minute.

Now three cigarettes in a row have been smoked, throughout yet more overly-anxious stim-fueled artistic brainstorming, both Avey and Fyo silently assuming that tomorrow would in reality consist of the same events as every other Saturday; recovering from the debauchery of the previous night, maybe with a half-hour or so of absent-minded musical improvisation.

The Ushi Onis had completed their set, and from what they heard from outside, it was agreed that their nonsense conversations were about on equal footing with the music, as far as time-wasting went. Not that they were bad, it's just.....it seemed as though they'd heard this same band hundreds of times, despite the fact this was their debut show. It seemed to Fyo, who had been in attendance for, shit, a decade now, that every show more-or-less went the same these days. You could even predict non-music related events. There was the guy who got way too drunk and was basically floating around the crowd, eyes only half-open, flailing around off-rhythm in a disconcertingly unhuman way during particularly intense performances--Fyo himself had been this guy on more occasions than he'd like to admit, as well as more occasions than he could literally remember. There was the creep getting kicked out for being creepy; that was a very strict rule for this scene, "NO CREEPS". You'd see it on basically any given flyer. House shows did tend to attract these creeps, what with the combination of pretty, young, and drug-addicted attributes of many of the female frequenters. Thankfully, Fyo had never been that guy. There was the kind of slapstick situation that occurred immediately after every band played, where the members of the other bands playing that night would come up and say "Hey, great set, what pedals do you use?" and then annoy the shit out of the poor guys just trying to fucking get their drums in the van, only for the same thing to happen to the original complimentary artists. Nobody ever learned their lesson. Nobody ever learned their lesson, forever and ever. This pretty much sums up the stagnation that Fyo has recently come to observe within the scene.

"Hey, I'm done here, if you are. Head back to my place?"

"Right you are."

The four-minute drive back to Fyo's apartment left just enough time to blair at obnoxious volume Avey's favorite song by The Mountain Goats (at least, his favorite song that day--the song changed frequently, but The Goats always remained Mountainous). On the way upstairs, Avey got a text from Tomie: "Beck pulled through. Pool party?"

So Avey said to Fyo; "Beck pulled through. Pool party?"

"Fuckin duh."

Tomie was a close friend as well as ex-girlfriend to both Avey and Fyo. Beck was their communal coke dealer. Fyo was the only person in The Crew whose apartment had a pool, and it was the deep depths of summer, so late night swimming was a common occurrence. Tonight, Tomie had brought Beck along (who surely had more coke, and anyone can see that hanging out with a coke dealer, who definitely had plenty of coke to spare, would certainly turn out to be a fun time--Fyo knew this from experience, as an old friend, Jericho, also happened to be a coke dealer before moving off to.....fuck-knows-where; Fyo wasn't sure WHY they hung out so much exactly, or why Jericho had given him so much free coke in those days; Jericho was gay, but Fyo didn't really feel like he could possibly be desirable enough to warrant such favor, especially with his [back then, at least] very socially awkward mannerisms, even after several lines of really honestly pretty great coke--although, Fyo [himself being hetero, this only now in the narrative needing to be made clear] usually thought the same thing about ladies he spent time with, and surprisingly often was proven wrong) as well as invited Fitch, who invited Les, who invited Beck, who invited Lil, who invited Vick, who invited.....

.....

Noujeff.  

"Wait you say WHO the fuck is coming to my apartment???" Fyo demands answers.

"Shit, I'm sorry Fyo. I didn't know Vick was friends with him, don't know why he still is. We'll tell him to fuck off once he gets here, waste some gas at least. But hey.....The Crew here ain't gettin' any younger, so let's fuckin' get to it. Pick a record already."

The Crew was, in no particular order:

Avey, reserved but strong-willed and resilient, and disarmingly cunning; he once got Fyo, his on-and-off-again girlfriend Elise, and himself a free pass to this really exclusive music festival in what can only be described as an "experimental city"--FORM Arcosanti was the name of the festival (the town being just "Arcosanti"), located smack dab in the middle of the deserts of Arizona, where Fyo first glimpsed that now-out-of-reach image, occasionally dreamt or half-remembered, of a lone mountain, in the middle of one of the least forgiving deserts in an entire superpower-nation's worth of land, one of the hottest and driest places around, soaring so high into The Places We Cannot Reach, the great heights, the domain of myth and fiction more than anything, of a mountain seen from the road of a lonely desert which had a peak covered, even here in the frenzied peaks of July, the radioactive horror show burning of July, a peak covered in SNOW. Beautiful, nostalgic (and always nostalgic, for there was no "winter" in Arizona), almost, no yes certainly CLEANSING snow. The rest of the trip only got better. That is all we'll say of it, for now;

Fyo, the one whose thoughts we gain direct access to (to hell with a fourth wall; give me 50, 500, 5,000,000 more walls, and I will break them all), generally responsible, has a dependable job as a pharmacy technician, "almost" a real job, and two major flaws; here we move into

 1.) Intense Manic Episodes On a Yearly, Predictable Basis

-----

Every year, in the period of time spanning between around March and June-Mid-July, Fyo would suffer an intense clinical episode of mania; he would become obsessive over ideas so obscure and opaque that he only sounded like a lunatic when describing them, and indulged in drug abuse as if suicidal, and more than once now had indeed proven to be so. Fyo would and did argue, however, that during these periods of admittedly (even by him) questionable ties to reality, his artistic output became noticeably higher in both quantity and quality than what was usually found in his "seasonal depression" (so-called) episodes during the months of October-February. No psychiatrist has yet explained this adequately.

 2.) An Unhealthy Obsession With All Forms of Art, As Well As the Definition of Art Itself

-----

From a very young age, Fyo had shown great interest in art, and strangely enough but of course conspicuously naturally, surrealist art in particular. At 12, on a family vacation to Florida for the purposes of the (back then affordable even by the lower-middle-class family, with some planning) relaxation of the beach and the primal thrill of the Great Twin Amusement Parks, he devoted a day to visiting the Salvador Dali museum in St. Petersburg, Florida; a couple years later, the very first band he was in (at 15 years old) was named after Dali's "The Burning Giraffe". Then he gradually caught on to the growing web of obscurities, myths, exaggerations, half-truths, genuine enigmas, and philosophical contradictions that were accepted by some as truth, and saw the art embedded in life; and in the mirror, he saw the reflection of such, and in that he saw things that moved him in ways he was naïve to previously. That's how he got older. That's how he saw that the waking life was just as absurd as the dream. All that mattered was which space he occupied at a given time;

Tomie, as mentioned previously was both a close friend and ex-girlfriend to both Avey and Fyo. Each relationship was separated by such distance (spatially and temporally) that it really didn't matter, everyone had moved on cross-country and it was just nice to have people just fuckin' caring about each other, you know? Tomie was not afraid to bite into you in a very personal way, as long as she knew it would help you. She was a great ally to have in the world, if sometimes blunt; but this bluntness was out of a genuine kindness and invariably proved effective somehow. If you trusted anyone's advice, it was Tomie's;

Fitch, constantly in-and-out of jail for something or other, after so many years the circumstances blurred out a bit. Being eternally and self-admittedly impermanent, he always seemed almost as if acting in repentance to the best of his abilities; but around people like this, hope for repentance was laughable;

Lil, probably the most adult of the group, an ex-girlfriend of Fyo from back in the day, had worked her way to a very well-paying analytics gig. She still found herself hanging around with these wannabe artists and revolutionaries, for whatever reason; she was certainly always welcome, and that gave her a warm, content feeling.....

"Pick a goddamn record" says Lil.

Every time The Crew got together for some midnight coke-fueled swimming, someone got to ceremoniously choose a record from Fyo's collection, off of which the cover of the cocaine would be inhaled. It was Fyo's night. He was having trouble deciding. The record that was chosen would also be played on the record player while the lines were being drawn and erased; the lines themselves were on the sleeve, the small but not ignorable visual component of the LP. He looked through his stack; Joyce Manor (played a show with them before they became big--frontman was kind of an asshole. No.), The Antlers (far too sad for shamelessly inhaled thrills), Talking Heads (no, we'll just end up putting "Once In a Lifetime" on repeat), no, no, no, no.....LCD Soundsystem? Hm. Yeah, this one. Sound of Silver, talk to me.

"Fuckin' finally. Okay let's get this train wreck a-rollin'."

Greed filled the eyes of everyone in the room. Along with record-choosing duties came the first line of the night. Fyo lays down one FAT fucking line, finely crushed almost down to the individual molecule it seemed, grabs the closest straw, leans over and looks down at the snowy mountain range here in the middle of the silver desert, and unflatteringly snorts with all his might, and feels each crystal immediately begin its own personal attack on his neurotransmitters, leans back to make sure everything falls into the mucous membrane, nothing wasted, except for Fyo himself, and steps back to fall comically onto the couch, a smile of contentment and even relief overtaking his facial expression as Nancy Whang chants "You can normalize. Don't it make you feel alive?"

This. This is the life.

[silver-handed]

Keldrin and Nev for the uncommon questions :3c

a a a h i didn’t see this but I’m doing it now and puttin it under a readmore bc that is a lot

Keldrin

QUESTIONS FOR YOUR OCs

What’s the maximum amount of time your character can sit still with nothing to do?

He can sit still forever if he has work or anything like that to do, but with absolutely nothing to do? I’d say a couple of hours, just people watching if there are others around, otherwise pacing

How easy is it for your character to laugh?

He can get a lil laugh pretty easy, but full on laughter is kinda rare for him now.

How do they put themselves to bed at night (reading, singing, thinking?)

Because the fucker never sleeps/goes into his ‘trance’, he can go into it pretty easily whenever he finally does.

How easy is it to earn their trust?

It takes a long while to earn his full trust tbh

How easy is it to earn their mistrust?

Pretty easy, he doesn’t put trust in people by default. But to get him to never trust you takes something very dumb, or very cruel

Do they consider laws flexible, or immovable?

Considering his profession, I’d say he thinks they are very, very flexible

What triggers nostalgia for them, most often? Do they enjoy that feeling?

The smell of rasberries and woodsmoke always remind him of someone he used to know. He likes it in the moment, it feels warm and lovely, but then he comes back and it just puts a deep pang of sadness and longing in his chest.

What were they told to stop/start doing most often as a child

Depends on the stage of his childhood, but usually to stop hiding or climbing shit, and start focusing

Do they swear? Do they remember their first swear word?

He swears a lot and nah, he thinks he was very very young tho

What lie do they most frequently remember telling? Does it haunt them? 

hmmm, something along the lies of “I’ll get you and it will all be okay, I promise.” He knew when he said it that it was a lie, and it bothers him so much

How do they cope with confusion (seek clarification, pretend they understand, etc)?

One of two ways: presses for more info in the moment, or pretends he understands and then goes and researches it on his own so he does understand in the future

How do they deal with an itch found in a place they can’t quite reach?

He normally rubs up against something if it’s somewhere like his back

What color do they think they look best in? Do they actually look best in that color?

Blacks and navy blues and he looks damn good in them

What animal do they fear most?

A turtle named Lucifer that really, truly, honestly wants to kill him even though he’s done absolutely nothing to it

How do they speak? Is what they say usually thought of on the spot, or do they rehearse it in their mind first?

If he has time to rehearse it in his mind then he does, but if he doesn’t then its whatever comes to mind first and then he frets over it and feels dumb forever afterwards

What makes their stomach turn?

Considering his line of work, not a lot really. Anything involving kids or drowning really bothers him, however.

Are they easily embarrassed?

By others? not really. tho every other time he opens his mouth or does something awkward he hates himself for an age.

What embarrasses them?

Misspeaking or messing up something simple he should be really good at. Also sexual stuff doesn’t embarrass him per se, but attraction directed at him from someone he is emotionally into? he’s so fucking awkward

What is their favorite number?

17. It just feels right

If they were asked to explain the difference between romantic and platonic or familial love, how would they do so?

He’d think about it for a long while before just...laying it bare the way those emotions make him feel, describing it very much in something like levels of warmth he gets from each

Why do they get up in the morning?

Got a guild to run, people to repay (doesn’t matter if they’re alive or not), and pure spite

How does jealousy manifest itself in them (they become possessive, they become aloof, etc)?

He gets either broody or sometimes slightly passive aggressive, but reels it in pretty quick bc he doesn’t wanna make an ass of himself 

How does envy manifest itself in them (they take what they want, they become resentful, etc)?

He gets a lil resentful, but tries to hush up about it

Is sex something that they’re comfortable speaking about? To whom? .

If it’s personal friends he’s know a while, sure. If its someone he’s going to sleep with but isn’t really into on an emotional level, sure. He’s not comfy speaking about it with anyone else tho, other than a long term partner.

What are their thoughts on marriage?

He’s been married in the past and very much enjoyed it, and he’d not hesitate to marry someone he truly, deeply loved

What is their preferred mode of transportation?

Walking or horseback riding. He loves the convenience of teleportation circles but he isn’t big on actually taking them

What causes them to feel dread?

Not hearing back from a member of the guild in time always sets him on edge, and when something bigger is uncovered by something that was supposed to be simple (Mr. Scratch, the painting, etc.)  

Would they prefer a lie over an unpleasant truth?

He always wants the truth, lying to him is one surefire way to either make him mad, or make him distrust you

Do they usually live up to their own ideals?

He tries to, but feels like he falls short tho he does pretty decent

Who do they most regret meeting?

The previous guild leader, and a couple of ‘friends’ from the past just after he took over that tried to use him

Who are they the most glad to have met?

Alabast, the council, his late wife, his parents, Elizabeth and her parents, the investigators, so so many people that he loves so much

Do they have a go-to story in conversation? Or a joke?

Not really, he does have a couple of missions from when he was young that he talks about a lot

Could they be considered lazy?

not really, he sometimes zones out and doesn’t work but he’s also...way way to into working and taking care of everything himself  

How hard is it for them to shake a sense of guilt?

This man has never shook a sense of guilt in his lifetime

How do they treat the things their friends come to them excited about? Are they supportive?

He’s very excited and wants to hear about it!! if he doesn’t understand it then he wants to know more about it

Do they actively seek romance, or do they wait for it to fall into their lap?

He kinda waits for it to fall into his lap, but he also pushes it away due to emotional baggage and fears and personal issues  

Do they have a system for remembering names, long lists of numbers, things that need to go in a certain order (like anagrams, putting things to melodies, etc)?

He sometimes makes little sentences out of them, but for the most part its pretty easy for him to remember stuff like that

What memory do they revisit the most often?

The memory of his wedding is high up there, and also the memory of losing his wife and trying to make things right

How easy is it for them to ignore flaws in other people?

Pretty easy, he runs a guild of very flawed people and he just wants to help them

How sensitive are they to their own flaws? 

 Very. this man nitpicks all of his own actions and flaws and always worries or puts himself down

How do they feel about children?

he l o v e s babies and kids and always wanted some of his own

How badly do they want to reach their end goal?

he kind of feels like he’s sort of already there? he just wants to make the guild as nice and reputable as it can be, and every time good new blood comes in he feels closer to that goal

If someone asked them to explain their sexuality, how would they do so?

“There are a lot of very attractive people out there and I appreciate each and every one”

QUESTIONS FOR CREATORS

A) Why are you excited about this character?

He’s just...he’s a very wonderful and good man that has had a lot of dark shit happen to him and i just wanna see him develop and interact with people

B) What inspired you to create them?

Ahhhh i just...really really wanted to do something with a thieves guild, and he just sort of sprung up from there?

C) Did you have trouble figuring out where they fit in their own story?

Not really? he sort of fell into place!

D) Have they always had the same physical appearance, or have you had to edit how they look?

I went back and forth on a few small things like hair color, but he’s been pretty solid!

E) Are they someone you would get along with? Would they get along with you?

I would love him and die for him and i like to think he’d like me to!

F) What do you feel when you think of your OC (pride, excitement, frustration, etc)?

Pride! he’s a good boy and that he is so loved just makes me very very happy and proud

G) What trait of theirs bothers you the most?

He refuses to take care of himself and always puts others first, even when its to his own detriment. Also, he drinks a lot, but no one has really caught him or called him out on it yet and it doesn’t really affect him too too much bc he doesn’t get drunk on the job very often, but still.

H) What trait do you admire most?

He cares so so much about his people and works so hard to help them

Nev 

QUESTIONS FOR YOUR OCs

What’s the maximum amount of time your character can sit still with nothing to do?

A little while, but not too long. He gets fidgety and anxious and starts tapping his foot n stuff

How easy is it for your character to laugh?

Pretty easy! Nev loves to laugh and be merry

How do they put themselves to bed at night (reading, singing, thinking?)

He does a lot of thinking, and he finds it easy to fall asleep to the sounds of other people talking or the sounds of someone else in the room either doing simple stuff quietly or falling asleep themself

How easy is it to earn their trust?

Easy! be good to him and be part of the guild and boom you’re in

How easy is it to earn their mistrust?

Pretty hard. He still trusts blake in a way, even tho Blake was an ass to him

Do they consider laws flexible, or immovable?

Again, very flexible

What triggers nostalgia for them, most often? Do they enjoy that feeling?

Sunny days in alasain down by the docks remind him of being young and training, and it makes him feel all warm and fuzzy inside

What were they told to stop/start doing most often as a child

When the guild first took him in, before Keldrin took over, he was yelled at a lot to stop crying and start doing what he was told

Do they swear? Do they remember their first swear word?

A fair bit, but growing up around criminals means it was when he was very young

What lie do they most frequently remember telling? Does it haunt them?

He remembers telling someone looking for Keldrin that he hadn’t seen him at all, no sir, not been through here, when Keldrin was taking over the guild. It doesn’t haunt him really, he’s quite proud of it

How do they cope with confusion (seek clarification, pretend they understand, etc)?

Questions a lot more than anything

How do they deal with an itch found in a place they can’t quite reach?

Like keldrin, rubs up on something, but is more likely to do it in the open

What color do they think they look best in? Do they actually look best in that color?

Browns n whites! he looks very nice in blacks, however

What animal do they fear most?

Owlbears scare him for some reason and he hates it bc they’re also so c o o l

How do they speak? Is what they say usually thought of on the spot, or do they rehearse it in their mind first?

He tries to take a minute to think about it bc it helps reduce his stutter

What makes their stomach turn?

The thought of anything happening to Ruby or Luna or his family at the guild

Are they easily embarrassed?

pretty easily! he gets bashful and shy quite often

What embarrasses them?

If he takes too long to say a sentence he gets embarrassed and frustrated with himself, and anyone calling him cute or handsome both embarrasses him and makes him happy. Also, explicitly talking about sex gets him

What is their favorite number?

32

If they were asked to explain the difference between romantic and platonic or familial love, how would they do so?

He’s another one that talks about them in sensory fashions, but compares em to food! Romantic is sweet and warm like a a fresh red velvet cake, friendship is sweet and tangy like key lime pie, and familial is just warm and comfy like a chocolate chip cookie (is it obvious nev likes food)

Why do they get up in the morning?

To make the guild proud and to take care of Ruby and to kiss Luna

How does jealousy manifest itself in them (they become possessive, they become aloof, etc)?

He kinda of pulls back and gets a lil down, like he knew it was coming

How does envy manifest itself in them (they take what they want, they become resentful, etc)?

he doesn’t really get envious? other people have their stuff and he has his. and if he really wants it he can find a way to get it  

Is sex something that they’re comfortable speaking about? To whom?

He is never comfy talking about it b u t he wants to, he’s just never gotten the chance to before tbh  

What are their thoughts on marriage?

He likes the idea of it, but never thought he would until recently

What is their preferred mode of transportation?

he likes to walk and he thinks boats are cool!

What causes them to feel dread?

Thinking about Luna’s missions and her going on them worries him, especially if keldrin ever seems worried. Also, the thought of Ruby’s mom coming back for her or hurting ruby

Would they prefer a lie over an unpleasant truth?

unpleasant truth normally, but if its something really bad then he’ll take a lie

Do they usually live up to their own ideals?

He doesn’t think he does, and he hasa really high ideals, but he does pretty good most of the time

Who do they most regret meeting?

Again, teh previous guild leader and the person who kidnapped him

Who are they the most glad to have met?

Keldrin and Luna and Ruby! they’ve all really helped him in a lot of ways over the years

Do they have a go-to story in conversation? Or a joke?

not really, he likes to listen to other people’s jokes n stories more than tell his own

Could they be considered lazy?

nah, he throws himself into his work and tries really hard to do good and do right

How hard is it for them to shake a sense of guilt?

kinda hard, but he gets over it eventually after talking to people about it

How do they treat the things their friends come to them excited about? Are they supportive?

Nev gets very excited right along with them and talks to them about it and loves to listen

Do they actively seek romance, or do they wait for it to fall into their lap?

He’s wanted to actively seek it but he’s been too shy in the past, and then it fell right in his lap  

Do they have a system for remembering names, long lists of numbers, things that need to go in a certain order (like anagrams, putting things to melodies, etc)?

he has a little tune in his head that he puts em to

What memory do they revisit the most often?

Meeting and kissing Luna, finding ruby, and that night at the guild when he was a little kid

How easy is it for them to ignore flaws in other people?

Very easy! he never has an issue at all with other people’s flaws

How sensitive are they to their own flaws?

Pretty sensitive, as he’s got low self esteem, but he can also ignore it every now and then

How do they feel about children?

He likes em but never thought he’d have any and then. welp. Now he’s a happy dad and wouldn’t trade it for the world

How badly do they want to reach their end goal?

He doesn’t really have one? he just wants to be a damn good thief and take care of his family and live a long life, and he wants that pretty bad but he also knows that he’s taking the steps towards that every day

If someone asked them to explain their sexuality, how would they do so?

*vague hand gestures* also the will smith pose towards luna

QUESTIONS FOR CREATORS

A) Why are you excited about this character?

He’s a sweetheart who has nowhere to go but up and is gonna see and do so much and just. ahhh I’m excited for his excitement and him seeing the world??

B) What inspired you to create them?

I just really wanted a fully sweet dude in this story tbh

C) Did you have trouble figuring out where they fit in their own story?

not really, he was one of the early characters :P

D) Have they always had the same physical appearance, or have you had to edit how they look?

pretty much the same, ye! he was a lil slimmer at one point but other than that he’s been pretty steady

E) Are they someone you would get along with? Would they get along with you?

I would kill for Nev in a heart beat and I hope so!

F) What do you feel when you think of your OC (pride, excitement, frustration, etc)?

Just very warm happy bubbly feelings bc he’s such a sweet cutie

G) What trait of theirs bothers you the most?

He is a little naive still somehow, and a lot of people take advantage of that and he let em walk all over him

H) What trait do you admire most?

He is just so good and trusting and will give the shirt off his back to help someone in need in a heartbeat

[kairoth]

1-7, 10, 12-15, 18-24, 28, 30, 38-46, 49-52, 60-61, 72-75, 85-92, 100, 102, 104-114, 117-120, 124-127, 129, 135-150? Do whichever you want though.

hey! done on laptop so sorry if there are any mistakes

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?

♥ my mum?? i think.

2. Are you outgoing or shy?

♥ definitely shy

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

♥ wellll soon we'll be going to see the two lil puppies i've gotta choose from and i'm excited about that!

4. Are you easy to get along with?

♥ i mean... idk?

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

♥ prob not

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

♥ hhh kind people. like, attracted to as in i'd date them... same thing pretty much but also i tend to fall for more dominant people.  

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

♥ prob not lmao. no one wants to date me i'm gross

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

♥ uhh my mum. last night. sort of.

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

♥ literally every song by EDEN takes up my top 50.

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

♥ YEA

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

♥ i mean sometimes.

15. What good thing happened this summer?

♥ it's not summer yet but uhhhh i'm gonna get a puppy!

18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

♥ hhh our parents are friends and we're still kind of awkward friends? we haven't like actually had full conversations in a long time but we still hang out sometimes.

19. Do you like bubble baths?

♥ yea! but like,, not to where you get bubbles in your mouth cos bleh

20. Do you like your neighbors?

♥ a little! the people close to us are pretty nice. there's this one old lady across the way from us whose dog i used to walk. she let's me pick oranges from her tree and talks to me. it's fun! she's away from home a lot tho since her husband died.

21. What are you bad habits?

♥ rambling, for one. picking at threads for two. uhh, can't think of any more off the top of my head but there's definitely a bunch of other ones.

22. Where would you like to travel?

♥ i reallllyyy wanna go to Ireland. definitely some places in Asia and some more in Europe.

23. Do you have trust issues?

♥ yes.

24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

♥ sleeeeep. soon enough it'll prob be my puppy

28. Who are you most comfortable around?

♥ my cats and my mum. ooh and my aunt danni.

30. Do you ever want to get married?

♥ maybe! i'm pretty polyamorous tho and if i was in a relationship with more than one person it'd feel unfair if i only married one of them... so it'd be really cool if we could make polyamorous marriage a thing pls.

38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

♥ OOF. uh. just. someone who is kind and loves me and will take care of me, and who i can do the same for. someone who will put up with my clinginess and paranoia. someone who loves animals and hates people who abuse animals or kids or other people just as much as i do. someone who can put up with my quirks in general. i always imagine someone who, if we're separated and reunite, will let me run to them and do the hug thing where they pick me up lol. we can read books to each other and they won't get frustrated if i stumble over my words, we can share music with each other, cook/bake with each other, travel, see an animal and just coo over them together, watch horror movies even tho i hate them but it's ok because i have them with me. sorry long answer lmao,, i got carried away

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

♥ barnes n noble, hot topic just bc, and uuuuuuh that's it.

40. What do you want to do after high school?

♥ ideally i could do a gap year to travel. i might do a gap year and work so i can get money. i don't know if i can get into college, but my mum suggested interning for a local vet, even tho i'm not in medicine, because it's good to have that knowledge if i wanna own an animal shelter. it's a good idea so i might do that.

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

♥ it depends. sometimes if you give someone a second chance they'll take it and stab you with it (metaphorically). it all just depends on what they did, who they are, how they are, how they feel about what they did.

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?

♥ i used to be super loud when i was younger. sometimes i am when with close friends. now, it could just be that i'm focused, or thinking, or comfortable, or sad, or sick, or upset. when i'm angry with my aunt bc she won't stop messing with me i'll go silent. idk.

43. Do you smile at strangers?

♥ sometimes!

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

♥ i'd like to say neither and outerspace. the ocean terrifies me. but so does outer space sometimes????

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

♥ depends on what's happening that day. if something exciting is happening i'll prob get up quick. and if i'm in bed cos i don't feel good then the thing that gets me up is like. the fear of disappointing my parents by not doing anything. or when like my cat is very insistent on needing something (like food or water or getting out of my room) and i don't want to be a bad owner and not get it.

46. What are you paranoid about?

♥ fff what am i not paranoid about?

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

♥ mmm... nothing i can really think about?

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

♥ black.

51. Ever wished you were someone else?

♥ oh definitely

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?

♥ my appearance. or my personality. hm.

60. Ever won a competition? For what?

♥ mmm... i won a fencing competition once. but like. it wasn't a huge competition. just a few little series of fights that our teacher was having us do.

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?

♥ nahh. i've gotten two detentions but never suspended

72. What colour are your towels?

♥ uhh the ones i use are white striped w green and pink.

72. How many pillows do you sleep with?

♥ there are two 72s??? oh well. uhh only one

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?

♥ yea! most of them are just around me, the only two i actually snuggle with are my bbies teddy (a bear i've had since 5) and addi (a panda i got like two years ago?)

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

♥ uhh. maybe 30? or somewhere around there?

75. Favourite animal?

♥ don't make me chooooose

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?

♥ never seen it

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?

♥ hhh nemo. he's such a good little clever fishie. v mischievous tho

87. First person you talked to today?

♥ mum!

88. Last person you talked to today?

♥ uh prob gonna be my mum

89. Name a person you hate?

♥ trump

90. Name a person you love?

♥ syd ! my kitty

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?

♥ uuuuuuuh nah

92. In a fight with someone?

♥ ? nah

100. How are you feeling?

♥ rn? pretty ok. i just finished my geometry course so i've only got three classes left !

102. Do you regret anything from your past?

♥ yes. my entire past. being born. like yikes

104. Do you miss anyone from your past?

♥ yes.

105. Ever been to a bonfire party?

♥ yup

106. Ever broken someone’s heart?

♥ ? who knows

107. Have you ever been on a horse?

♥ yea! i used to do lessons but i stopped

108. What should you be doing?

♥ rn? schoolwork

109. Is something irritating you right now?

♥ schoolwork

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

♥ definitely

111. Do you have trust issues?

♥ yes

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?

♥ uh my cat i think

113. What was your childhood nickname?

♥ hb

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?

♥ yea! my fave state to go to currently is maryland. i love the temperature and the landscape and the fireflies.

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

♥ sometimes!

118. Do you like Chinese food?

♥ one of my faves tbh

119. Favourite book?

♥ oof. that's a hard one. uhm. we were liars by e. lockhart.

120. Are you afraid of the dark?

♥ yes.

124. Do you believe in love at first sight?

♥ no. lust at first sight, yea, but not love.

125. Do you believe in true love?

♥ maybe.

126. Are you currently bored?

♥ a lil.

127. What makes you happy?

♥ loved ones, animals, music, warm blankets.

129. What your zodiac sign?

♥ this is always a complex answer from me lmao. technically i'm a leo. but i was supposed to be born in october, not august. and i've always related more to scorpio (and pisces tbh lmao). so i always wanna say i'm a scorpio

135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

♥ FF. IT'S SO DUMB I DON'T EVEN WANNA SAY. WORST TIME OF MY LIFE. sorry for caps

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?

♥ closed

137. How tall are you?

♥ 4'11

138. Curly or Straight hair?

♥ on me? well long it's curly but it's short rn. it kinda still curls in some spots tho

139. Brunette or Blonde?

♥ naturally i'm a mix. or 'dirty blonde'

140. Summer or Winter?

♥ winter.

141. Night or Day?

♥ night

142. Favourite month?

♥ november

143. Are you a vegetarian?

♥ nahh. i enjoy meat too much

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?

♥ milk chocolate is the only chocolate in my eyes

145. Tea or Coffee?

♥ mmm that's hard. i love earl grey tea but coffeeeeeeeeeeeee

146. Was today a good day?

♥ eh. i finished a class so yea

147. Mars or Snickers?

♥ snickers

148. What’s your favourite quote?

♥ ffffff idk tbh

149. Do you believe in ghosts?

♥ i am a ghost!!!

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?

♥ there's no book close to me and i couldn't find my fave which is stressing but i'll do this before looking for it so i'mma just use a random one. book is we all looked up, by tommy wallach. "he marched into the school and took the director aside, explaining that they had a strict rule in their house - curriculars before extracurriculars."

[scorpioetry]

My incredible brilliant and peerless daughter @blesbianism tagged me to do this and I’m going to make her proud!

Rules: Answer these 85 statements about yourself, then tag 20 people.

last

1. Drink - literally the weakest iced tea I’ve ever had

2. Phone call - my mom. something about the wee doggies

3. text message - “I KNOWWW!!!! IM LIVING MY BEST LIFE”

4. song you listened to - sound and color by alabama shakes

5. time you cried - can’t remember ): probably a movie

ever

6. dated someone twice? - no

7. kissed someone and regretted it - yes

8. been cheated on - no

9. lost someone special - yeah.

10. been depressed - indeed. I am now!

11. gotten drunk and thrown up - no

fave colors

12. Peach

13. Blue

14. Millennial Pink

in the last year have you…

15. made new friends - god yes!!!

16. fallen out of love - I’m confident that yes but it’s a lil bit of a work in progress

17. laughed until you cried - yes. Tonight. Lucy told me an airport story that had me on the floor.

18. found out someone was talking about you - i think so? IDK!!!!!

19. met someone who changed you - hope so!

20. found out who your friends are - hmmm. no.

21. kissed someone on your facebook friends list - no!

general

22. how many of your facebook friends do you know irl - most of them but I have a few random like Martin kwerly from Ned’s declassified

23. do you have any pets - two doggies!

24. do you want to change your name - yes I know it sounds stupid but I wish my name was honeymoon and I wish I had a different last name

25. what did you do for your last birthday - nothing

26. what time did you wake up today - 7am

27. what were you doing at midnight last night - sleeping girl!!!!

28. what is something you cant wait for - Michelle tagged this as black panther which is true but number one is becoming a better Me this year

30. what are you listening to right now - sound and color again

31. have you ever talk to a person named tom - yes??? Lmao

32. something thats getting on your nerves - Dominic never texts me!!!!! What the fuck!.

33. most visited website - tumblr

34. hair color - brown

35. long or short hair - i love long hair but mine is short

36. do you have a crush on someone - ask me who I DONT have a crush on!

37. what do you like about yourself - I’m kind and I can make people laugh and I can be judgmental but I think I keep it to the right things

38. want any piercings? - lots but I know I couldn’t do the proper care

39. blood type - idk but I gave blood last year and the flobotomist poked me and went “oh you drink a lot of water?” And I’ve never come down from that high

40. nicknames - i have none but I love being called pet names like Baby honey sugar sweetie etc

41. relationship status - whole

42. zodiac - message me to get into it

43. pronouns - she/her, or they/them, rarely he/his

44. fave tv shows - the good place, AtLA/LoK

45. tattoos - i have one and want more

46. right or left handed - right

47. ever had surgery - wisdom teeth

48. piercings - ears. And two cartilage ones I used shitty jewelry for so now I have two extra accidental little tattoos I forgot about!

49. sport - watch your mouth!

50. vacation - chicago pls

51. trainers - ???????? I’m a Boots Gal

more general

52. eating - frequently

53. drinking - stay hydrated my babie children’s

54. im about to watch - the back of my eyelids

55. waiting for - black. panther!!!! (Left unchanged from Michelle)

56. want - to be honest and healthy

57. get married - not in my cards :/

58. career - i like mine for now. Ideally, I’d be a singer/comedian

which is better

59. hugs or kisses - hugs

60. lips or eyes - lips

61. shorter or taller - SHORTER.

62. older or younger - older

63. nice arms or stomach - all tummies are nice you fool. You rube.

64. hookup or relationship - idk broe!!!! Relationship I bet

65. troublemaker or hesitant - hesitant!!!!

have you ever

66. kissed a stranger - yes mostly unfortunately, this is to be avoided

67. drank hard liquor - yes, unfortunately, this is to be avoided!

68. lost glasses - not ones I was using

69. turned someone down - nope

70. sex on first date - what is a date?

71. broken someones heart - I hope not.

72. had your heart broken - hmmmmm. Only by myself!

73. been arrested - no

74. cried when someone died - yes

75. fallen for a friend - convinced myself I had but actually no

do you believe in

76. yourself - yes!

77. miracles - yes!

78. love at first sight - yes

79. santa clause - whom?

80. kiss on a first date - live a little!

81. angels - hmmmmmm. No

other

82. best friend’s name - lucy

83. eye colour - dark blue

84. fave movie - nick and Norah’s infinite playlist, girl walks into a bar, while you were sleeping, when harry met sally

85. fave actor - Oscar and John..... my boys

tags: ok hex let’s try

@furcoatdreamgirl @part-time-pyro @tropicalfucko @librabutch @libramimosa @cleanie @manaphy @hartlem

[kxlebcross]

[ even numbers for the weird asks, pleaseeee ]

me: has to google what are even numbers lol

2. chocolate bars or lollipops? lollipops, cuz after that i can munch on the lil lollipop stick too which keeps me busy lol

4. how did your elementary school teachers describe you? i know it totally doesn’t look like that but i used to be the class’ smart kid who participated in all kind of competitons and shit like that, was in the school choir, went to music school... so yeah, i was pretty much your average nerd, but then i grew up stewpid haha

6. pastel, boho, tomboy, preppy, goth, grunge, formal or sportswear? a weird mix of tomboy and grunge, depending on the day and actual mood, weather and whatever the hell i got clean lol

8. movies or tv shows? movies - i usually lose interest in every series after like... 2-3 episodes? i only finished like 3-4 deries in my whole life so i guess the number speaks for itself

10. game you were best at in p.e.? i used to be pretty good at volleyball back then, though i was always considered too short to be on the school team haha 

12. name of your favorite playlist? am 4:44 with a little moon emoji, made by yours truly (aka me)

14. favorite non-chocolate candy? i don’t really eat sweets... but when i do i go for sour jellies but idk if that counts as candy haha

16. most comfortable position to sit in? have you ever saw one of those “bisexuals can’t sit normally” memes? pretty much all of those, i always sit in random poses until my back gives in, i don’t have a favorite position tho

18. ideal weather? the summer night’s warm weather with a little breeze, maybe with some clouds... but i usually enjoy rains and thunderstorms too unless i have to go out because then i’m like bruh

20. preferred place to write (i.e., in a note book, on your laptop, sketchpad, post-it notes, etc.)? depends on what i have to write - for school notes i usually use a notebook and/or my laptop; for stories - my laptop or my phone’s notes if the inspiration gets me outside; everything else i’ll just write on random scraps of paper or in random notebooks just to never find them again haha

22. role model? i don’t really.... have one? i rather have a motto to live by but i don’t really look up to anyone tbh

24. favorite crystal? don’t have one, i dunno shit about crystals lol

26. favorite activity to do in warm weather? go out for a nice walk or some drink with my friends, walk my cat outside or just chill on my balcony with a boo while terrorizing my neighbors with a randomly chosen edm playlist

28. five songs to describe you? human by sevdaliza badmind by kuzi scar by foxes throat full of glass by combichrist 5:3666 by machine gun kelly

30. places that you find sacred? uhhh..... i can’t really think of any that would fit here? but i never really step in weird plant formations in forests and shit like that, cuz better be safe than sorry

32. top five favorite vines? i literally only have one favorite vine and it’s the two guys chillin in a hot tub, thats it

34. advertisements you have stuck in your head? every seasonal whiskas one because of the baby cats.... but other than that i haven’t seen an ad in ages, i don’t have tv and use adblock on pc haha

36. what is the first meme you remember ever seeing? i...c an’t remember, it was probably one of the rage comics or trollface comics? can’t really recall tbh it was ages ago

38. lemonade or tea? lemonade, with lots of ice cubes and mint, give it to me pls

40. weirdest thing to ever happen at your school? well in elementary some guy from the older classes took a sh*t then went to one of the classrooms to wipe his ass with the curtains there lol also some other time someone pissed out of the window on the first floor  in high school someone gassed the whole school with pepper spray, but like an insane amount, and everyone went immediately panic mode, police and firemen were called, the whole school evacuated..... and the one responsible for that had to pay like an insane amount of money for the police/fire dept. action haha

42. jacket pockets or pants pockets? pants pockets, i don’t trust jacket pockets cuz they usually dont have a lil zipper to close them up and i’d totally lose my phone if i put it there, im stewpid like that

44. favorite scent for soap? orange-vanilla or some other citrus-y scent

46. most comfortable outfit to sleep in? anything oversized will do with some pants/underwear

48. if you were a fruit, what kind would you be? probably a grapefruit, fucking bitter about everything lmao

50. what made you laugh the hardest you ever have? once i laughed at a plastic bag being dragged around by the wind for like 10 minutes while being fucked up drunk... does that count?

52. favorite font? hands down times new roman

54. what did you learn from your first job? that the customer isn’t always right and that apparently i had a knack for putting down tiles

56. favorite tradition? does halloween count? i love halloween

58. four talents you’re proud of having? i’m a really good driver.... and i think that’s it? i really can’t come up with anything else... does being loud and obnoxious sometimes count? and i think i’m good enough with people too... and i think i’m a good listener? idk, i’m pretty useless tbh

60. if you were a character in an anime, what kind of anime would you want it to be? give me the good old horror and make me the obnoxious side character who rarely ever speaks cuz no one ever asks them anything, that would pretty much resemble my actual life

62. seven characters you relate to? bojack horseman, sal paradise, loki from mcu, wednesday addams, oba yozo from no longer human, richie tozier, holden caulfield

64. favorite website from your childhood? club penguin! i wasted sooooo much time on there, sheesh....

66. favorite flower(s)? i really like succulents and ferns! and cactuses... or anything that’s low maintenance tbh

68. worst flavor of any food or drink you’ve ever tried? licorice... and also cucumber lemonade, gross

70. left or right handed? right

72. worst subject? i’m really bad with history and physics, i’m just way too dumb for those

74. at what pain level out of ten (1 through 10) do you have to be at before you take an advil or ibuprofen? around 9-10, i’m pretty much used to all my chronic pains and tbh i don’t like taking pain meds cuz i always have to take double because once i was misdiagnosed and spent almost a year on painkillers so barely anything works for me now... thanks public healthcare

76. what’s your favorite potato food (i.e. tater tots, baked potatoes, fries, chips, etc.)? fries... i’d love some now, i’m actually hungry 

78. coffee from a gas station or sushi from a grocery store? coffee from gas station, now pretty much all of them have decent coffee machines and the prices are okay too and i definitely trust them more than any boxed sushi ever

80. earth tones or jewel tones? jewel

82. pc or console? i grew up as a pc kid and tbh never had the money for a console so i just got stuck with it haha

84. podcasts or talk radio? if i necessarily have to choose then podcasts

86. cookies or cupcakes? both as long as its witch choccie

88. your greatest wish? let’s be realistic - i’d like to have my own place and little car and cats and i’d be all good

90. luckiest mistake? drunk kissing this one guy from my esports team after telling him i was a lesbian and he told me he had a girlfriend, it was stewpid tho, lets not get back to it

92. lamps, overhead lights, sunlight or fairy lights? sunlight and fairy lights, the latter necessarily in blue, it’s just neat and doesn’t bring in all the mosquitos at summer when i leave the window open

94. favorite season? spring

96. desktop background? some assassin’s creed logo fanart i’ve found on alphacoders

98. favorite historical era? i.... really...... hate....... history...... blame it on my middle school teacher who made me hate it lol