#i just dint feel like they actually care or see me as a person a lot

[arts-and-maths]

.

[the-authoress-writes]

Dangerous Games

Tom “Iceman” Kazansky x Navy Nurse Wife!reader

Synopsis: The saying goes “Play stupid games, win stupid prizes”.

Well, Mrs. Thomas Kazansky is about to learn another version of this saying; “Play dangerous games, win dangerous prizes”.

But she doesn’t exactly mind.

Warnings: Mrs. Kazansky gets a little frisky in public, but nothing explicit, some cursing, and a little bit of steaminess, but again, nothing explicit.

Author’s Note: “I don’t write reader fic”, she said.

“I really don’t”, she said.

But here we are.

And I entirely blame both @valmare and Val himself.

I wrote this as a writing exercise, actually, because @valmare and I have slightly different approaches to Tom Kazansky; she has a more dominant take on him, while mine is more romantic and soppy, but no less passionate (I think).

I wrote this just to see if I could somehow combine both traits/takes in one story.

And… hoo, boy, I like to think I was successful.

That, combined with reading one of my grandmother’s ancient Silhouette Romance novels, I thought it was about time that the turns were tabled on the men.

Let’s be the ones to snap them like twigs, and not the other way around.

Without further ado, here we are!

“So what’s on the agenda today,” she asked her husband, as he sat at the kitchen counter eating his breakfast, while she stood on the other side, finishing her cup of yogurt, before she had to head to work for the shift she was called to fill in at the last minute yesterday.

“Well,” Tom began, after swallowing, “not much, just a meeting which apparently couldn’t wait until Monday, in the afternoon—other than that, nothing else really.

And uh, Mav and the guys are coming back home tonight; like I said last week, Sli and I were going to greet them, and they’re going out for drinks at the O Club later, but I can tell them I can’t go—”

“No, you go, enjoy yourself, I know it’s been a while since you last saw Mav and the flyboys,” she smiled.

In a rare occurrence, Mav and Tom’s deployments didn’t match up, leaving him and Slider on shore, while Mav and Merlin, Wood and Wolf were at sea.

She could hear the calls Tom would make in the evenings to the Vinson, to the various officers who owed him, already rather influential at the recently-received rank of Lieutenant Commander, for updates on Mav in particular.

She’d heard the stories both from the man himself, and from Tom, how the Mitchell name hung like an albatross around the diminutive pilot’s neck, how his basic medical needs were overlooked by dint of his “traitorous” surname.

As a nurse, especially a Navy nurse, it was beyond unconscionable.

She was glad that Mav had Tom as a friend, and it touched her to see the care he extended to his whole TOPGUN class.

“Such a Mother Goose,” Mav and Slider would say, both with sadness, but the former with a soul-deep sadness.

“Are you sure, milaya?” Tom’s voice brought her back to the present, as he came around the counter to step into her personal space, his hands on her waist, infusing her whole being with the warmth that only he could give her. “Because I’m really feeling bad that I have basically a whole day off, and you have to work.

We could have a movie night with some popcorn and ice cream, and you can talk about how people like me are the craziest sons of bitches around,” he grinned, referring to how they met a little over three years ago, after a little training mishap. “I’ll gladly keep your misery company.”

She smiled, resting her hand on the chiseled plane of his bare chest, as her index finger idly played with the chain of his dog tags, “No, like I said, even last week, you go and enjoy yourself with the boys.” Her smile took on a more devilish quirk, “Besides, you can make it up to me later.”

Tom raised an eyebrow, “Oh, I can, can I?”

“I’m pretty sure you’ll manage,” she teasingly replied.

“Uh-huh,” he breathed, stepping impossibly closer, “and how exactly do you want me to make it up to you?”

“You’ll think of something.”

“How about a little down payment, then?”

He didn’t even bother waiting for her positive, always positive, response before one hand was buried in her hair, and his lips were on hers.

It was a kiss full of the easy confidence of a man who knew he was given what he took, and the passion and devotion of one who knew what a gift that was.

She could have gotten lost in her husband’s embrace and kiss for eternity, but the rude realization that she had a shift to prepare for, made her reluctantly, oh-so-reluctantly, push him away.

“As much as I’d really love to continue this, I can’t.

I have to go.”

He pouted like a child, the effect amusing to see on his already-full, kiss-swollen lips, and she gently carded her hand through his hair, soft and slightly curling without the gel, pushing it away from where it flopped onto his forehead. “I know most of this day didn’t pan out how we wanted it to, but we’ll make the best of it—we always do.”

“I know.

You’re sure it’s okay with you if I go out with the boys tonight?”

“Yes, Tom, how many times do I have to tell you?

Go have fun—but not too much fun,” she smiled.

He leaned forward, tucking his head into her neck, inhaling deeply, “You’re the only one I want to have fun with.”

“I would hope so, Thomas Vasilyevich,” she replied, lightly poking him in the side, “seeing as I’m your wife.”

“Oof,” he mock-winced, drawing back to look her in the eyes, “Russian naming me, huh?

Well, Mrs. Kazanskaya, two can play at that game,” he rejoined, leaning in to kiss her again.

However, she pushed him away, laughing, “You are a menace, Thomas Jacob Kazansky!

I have to go!”

“Worth a shot,” he laughed, letting her go.

She gathered her lunch into her bag, along with her paperwork, and shouldered the tote, before turning back to face Tom, who was leaning against the counter, long, sweatpants-clad legs crossed at the ankles, mirroring his arms, a knowing smirk on his lips. “Not going to kiss me goodbye?”

With a sigh, she asked, “If I kiss you goodbye, will you keep your hands to yourself?”

He clicked his tongue, “You drive a hard bargain, lyubimaya moya, but I’ll try.”

“Don’t try, just do,” she replied, amending one of Mav’s favorite sayings, stepping closer to peck him on the lips.

True to his word, he didn’t move an inch, but the regret on his face made her have to resist the temptation to kiss him and say to hell with her shift today. “I’ll see you later, okay?”

“Okay.”

And here, a sudden idea struck her. “Hey, wait a minute, you said that you guys were going to the O Club, right?”

“Yes,” he replied, drawing out the syllable. “Why?”

“Because I was thinking that if I can, maybe I can meet you guys there, join you flyboys.”

Tom’s eyes lit up. “That’d be great!”

“You guys won’t mind?”

“I won’t mind,” he shook his head.

She good-naturedly rolled her eyes, “I know you won’t mind, what about the guys?”

“I’m sure the guys won’t mind, but they can take it up with me if they don’t like it.

Try to make it?”

“I will—hopefully, I’ll see you later.

And you’re sure you don’t need your other girl today?” she asked, double checking that he didn’t need his Chevelle, since her car was in the shop that week.

“No,” he shook his head, “Slider’s picking me up, you take her.

I love you, milaya.”

“I love you too.”

With that farewell, she dashed out the door, fleeing her own house like Lot, because she knew she’d never leave if she looked back at Tom.

Chaos.

That was what her shift at NMCSD was like.

Some unlucky or hapless person somewhere had probably said “It sure is quiet around here,” or some other variation of that phrase, and brought the wrath of the medical gods down upon them.

She’d had no less than ten emergencies to deal with, and at the end of her shift, she felt—no—knew—she deserved a drink.

A quick glance at her watch showed that it was just before 1800–from her experience, the carriers usually docked at 1500 or 1600, which meant they should all be at the O Club already.

Not wanting to give the charge nurse an opportunity to call her for something else, she practically ripped off her uniform, changing into the nicer spare clothes she kept in her locker just in case she had somewhere to be that wasn’t the grocery or straight home.

It was a worn, but well-fitting pair of jeans, sensible shoes, a tank top, and finally, a white buttondown with vertical blue stripes which she pilfered from Tom’s closet, that she never saw him wear.

After throwing on the shirt, leaving it unbuttoned, and tucking in her tank, she hastily walked (okay, ran) out of NMCSD, and headed to her parking spot.

God had mercy on her, as the traffic was light all the way to the O Club, the Almighty surely knowing that she’d reached her limits of bullshittery, that all she wanted after this day was a stiff drink, and her husband’s company, despite the fact that there would be others around, friends as they were to her.

It was a Saturday night, and the parking lot was full, but she managed to find a spot on the far end of the lot, a slight sheen of sweat breaking on her skin despite the AC, as she maneuvered in, not wanting to scratch her husband’s beloved car.

The flaring, insistent ache in her feet was testament to the long walk to the entrance, exposing just how many people had to be here, and true enough, once she pushed the doors open, the bar was hopping.

She moved through the crowded bar, searching for Merlin, Slider, or Tom—there’d be little hope of finding Wood or Wolf, and no hope of finding Mav, in this press of people.

She was heading through the crowd towards the bar when she smacked straight into someone.

An apology was on her lips, when the person turned, and she heard, “Hey, Mrs. Ice, how are you!”

And she looked up, up, up into the smiling face of Sam “Merlin” Wells.

“Hey, Merls, how are you, how was deployment?” she said, hugging the ludicrously tall RIO.

“Ehh, hot, as usual, but otherwise, uneventful; just running our CAPs, and buzzing the tower every now and then.”

She guffawed, “That’s Mav for you—I don’t know who’s crazier; Mav, or you, for willingly sitting in the same jet as him.”

Merlin leaned down, “Tell you a secret?”

“Sure.”

“Probably me, because I actually enjoy it,” he murmured.

She chuckled, “Oh, Samuel, never change.”

“Hey, what am I doing, let me get you to the guys’ table!

Come on!!”

He put his hand on her shoulder to make sure she didn’t get lost in the crowd, and led her to a table in the back. “Guys, look who I found!”

“Well, hey, if it isn’t my favorite Ice Queen!” Mav cried, leaping to his feet and pulling her into a hug.

“Hey, Mav, how are you?” she beamed, glad to see her husband’s best friend and wingman.

“Better, after seeing your pretty face,” the black-haired pilot grinned a grin which would probably make quite a few people here swoon, if its full force were turned on them.

She smacked his shoulder, though she was unable to stop her smile, “Stop it, you incorrigible flirt, you’re not my type, and even if you were, I’m very happily taken.”

“Ah, you wound me, my fair Ice Queen,” Mav dramatically clutched his chest.

“You’ll live,” she teasingly rolled her eyes.

“Mind getting your hands off my wife, so I can say hello to her, Mav?”

A glance behind Mav showed Tom standing there, a sight in his summer whites, an arch expression on his face, but those who knew him would be able to see the glowing humor in his eyes—but over all, the joy and love.

Mav moved aside, gesturing grandly at her. “All yours.”

“You bet your ass, Mitchell,” Tom nodded.

“Excuse me, I have a very nice ass, I have that on good authority,” the other pilot affrontedly stated as he walked backwards to his seat.

The voice of Charles “Chipper” Piper called, “Ugh, come on, Mav, no one wants to hear about your pasty ass.”

“You’re one to talk, Chip,” Marcus “Sundown” Williams chuckled.

Tom shook his head and stepped closer, making everything else fade into the background, his beautiful smile on his face. “You came.”

“I needed to,” she sighed, “I need a drink.

And the whole you being here is a nice bonus.”

He blushed slightly, ducking his head. “Yeah?”

“Mm-hmm.”

“Well, come on, let’s get you that drink,” he replied, leading her to the table, around which sat Mav, Merlin, Slider, Wolf, Chipper, and Sundown.

“Hey guys,” she waved, taking the seat beside Tom.

They all greeted her as Tom called over one of the waitresses, ordering his usual vodka on the rocks along with her usual Old Fashioned.

When it arrived, she shocked them all by drinking more than half of it in one sitting, heavily setting the glass down on the table.

“That kind of day, huh, sweetheart?” Tom asked, his voice full of sympathy, warmth, and the slightest hint of laughter.

She turned a baleful look on him. “What do you think?”

He blinked, obviously weighing his words, the rest of the flyboys holding their breath. “I think maybe I should get you another one when you’re done with that.”

“God, I love you, Tom Kazansky,” she breathed.

The table collectively exhaled, as Tom grinned. “Aren’t I lucky?”

The night wore on, dinner eventually being ordered from the bar’s kitchen for everyone, and Merlin was the first to leave, saying that his wife was coming home late that night from taking care of a medical emergency with her mother, who lived on the other side of the States, and he wanted to be there to greet her.

The flyboys tossed peanuts teasingly at Merlin, Chipper and Mav whooping, Merlin flipping them the bird with both hands as he laughed, and said goodnight.

The remaining group continued on, and the vodkas Tom had drunk had loosened him up—he wasn’t drunk by any means, but his laughter was a bit louder, his eyes a bit brighter.

He was telling a story about one of the instructors from the TOPGUN session he’d been asked to help out with, since he wasn’t deployed this rotation.

It was a story she’d already heard, and so she allowed his words to fade slightly, just watching him as he spoke, fiddling with the straw of the second Old Fashioned Tom had ordered for her.

She smiled as he gestured animatedly, making the light glint off the gold ring on his left hand, which matched the one on hers.

Seeing it did funny things to her stomach, seeing the tangible proof that that man was hers.

Add to that the fact that Tom was in his summer whites… it was a cocktail more intoxicating than anything the bar behind her could ever offer.

She exhaled evenly, taking a sip of the water she’d switched to after her second Old Fashioned, admiring the figure he cut, an exemplar of US Naval excellence.

If you asked her later, she wouldn’t be able to tell you why she did it.

But the devilish thought of wanting to see if she could tilt him off-kilter entered her mind regardless, and she hid a smile behind the rim of her water glass.

She nonchalantly shifted her chair closer to Tom and innocently placed a hand above his knee, making him glance at her, and offer her a fleeting smile, while continuing the story.

Ever so carefully, she inched her way towards the inseam of his trousers, rubbing small circles as she went, which got her a minuscule narrowing of his eyes and a barely-there glance as he spoke.

She smiled back, stilling her hand, and he continued.

Once he had relaxed into his chair again, she began moving again, shifting her hand higher and higher, letting her fingernails catch repeatedly on the seam.

He cleared his throat and soldiered on, shifting in his seat, but the slightest tone of strain was beginning to creep into his voice now, and she mustered all the stoicism she’d learned from her husband to keep her face straight.

As her hand moved further up his inseam, she was treated to the sight of his jaw tensing, the sheen of sweat gathering at his temples, the movement of his Adam’s apple as he swallowed thickly, the sound of the strain in his voice, and the hitch in his breath.

She knew that if she continued this, she was playing a very dangerous game, but she couldn’t bring herself to care at that moment.

So she inched further up, letting her fingernails dig into the seam, flicking it almost audibly, which elicited a cough from her husband.

Slider whacked Tom on the back, saying, “You okay, Ice?”

“Yeah,” he rasped, “just—just swallowed the wrong way.”

At this point, she was mere inches away from being so obscenely high on his thigh that the other flyboys would probably see, but just to see what Tom’s reaction would be, she made as though she were going to go there.

Smoothly, he placed his hand atop hers, somehow managing to conceal the fact that he had plucked her hand from basically his lap, bringing it up to his lips as he finished the story, his eyes stormy as he cut his gaze to her.

Maybe, she realized, as she looked into his tempestuous eyes, maybe she had made a very, very big mistake.

After another hour, they began to wrap up, hugging and slapping each other on the back, and for the first time since she’d met Tom Kazansky, she was not looking forward to being alone with him.

When the final farewells had been spoken, Tom wrapped an arm around her shoulder, walking them towards the distinct shape of his Chevelle, visible now that they were some of the last people at the bar.

“I can drive us, if you want,” she offered, testing the waters.

“No, I’ll be the one.

Keys.”

His tone was unreadable, and she fished the keys out of her pocket, handing them to him.

He led her to the passenger’s side, but just before she reached for the handle to open the shotgun door, she found herself pressed against the back passenger door, looking up into her husband’s face.

She refused to buckle at his impassive stare, looking evenly into his eyes; depthless blue, the color of the sea at twilight, in the dim illumination afforded by the streetlamps.

His hand shifted, and her breath hitched, but he only moved his hand past her, the familiar click of the Chevelle’s door release echoing in the thick San Diego night air.

Tom pulled the door further open, inclining his head and stepping back.

She swallowed, but moved to sit in the passenger’s seat, the sound of the shutting door feeling like some sort of passage of sentence.

Moments later, he opened the driver’s side door, sliding in and shutting it, however, he didn’t start the engine.

She held her breath, waiting to see what he would do next, but he only started the car, the purr of the Chevelle doing nothing to ease her tension, serving only to ratchet it up, the familiar streets leading home passing by.

The silence in the car was almost a living entity, made worse by the fact that Tom kept his eyes firmly fixed on the road before them, and she would be lying if she said that her heart wasn’t racing.

She was beginning to see the reasoning behind her husband’s callsign, between his nonchalant attitude and his unerring patience to wait her out, wait for her to slip.

Well.

She wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction.

…

She hoped so, at any rate.

She’d always been weak for him, honestly, and she suspected she always would be.

Much too soon, they pulled into their driveway, and Tom cut the engine, leaving her in silence, literally and figuratively, as he stepped out without a word.

She briefly debated whether or not to stay in the car, but knew deep down that that was not an option, so she got out of the Chevelle, also making her way inside.

After locking up the doors and checking the rest of the house, she exhaled and looked warily up at the stairs. “‘Screw your courage to the sticking place,’ woman,” she murmured, striding determinedly up the stairs.

The lights were on in the bedroom, and she saw Tom at the dresser, keeping his submariner in its box, his face somehow still impassive.

She moved to the bed, picking up the pile of night clothes she’d laid out that morning, muttering, “I’m going to the bathroom,” and darted towards the en suite.

However, before she could make it there, a hand wrapped around her upper arm, and once again, she got the breath knocked out of her, finding her body pressed against the wall behind her by the solid mass of her husband before her, his hands on either side of her head.

“What was that about tonight, hmm, milaya?” he spoke lowly, making a shiver run down her spine.

“What was what?” she replied, affecting a light tone.

“You know exactly what I’m talking about,” he replied, implacable.

“Oh, that,” she shrugged, caving slightly.

“Yes, that.

And just what were you thinking?”

“Ehhh—nothing much, really.” Well, she mentally admitted, that much was true.

“Uh-huh.

See, I think you were trying to get me to lose it,” he declared.

She somehow managed to muster up an innocent expression. “Uh, nope, not at all.”

“Sure.

So your hand at my inseam was just complete coincidence, was it?”

“Has to be.”

He stared her down just like he had in the O Club parking lot, attempting to keep his expression stoic, but this close, she could see his eyes—how there was only a thin ring of midnight gray, his pupils blown wide from the desire he was trying to keep down.

She inhaled sharply, her lips parting, and his gaze immediately locked onto the sight.

When he spoke next, his voice was low and trembling. “You don’t know what you do to me.”

“I think I have some kind of idea,” she breathlessly murmured.

“Fuck—” he whispered brokenly before kissing her like he was at 38,000 feet and she was the oxygen he needed to breathe.

Caught in his riptide, she was helpless but to hold onto him.

Air surged back into her lungs as his kisses moved down to her neck, only to be stolen from them moments later, a cry halfway between pain and pleasure carried on her breath, when his ardor seared into the delicate skin there.

“That hand of yours—and you wearing my shirt—you drive me crazy,” he spoke into the juncture of her neck and shoulder.

“I think you like it, though,” she whimpered, hitching her legs around his unfairly narrow waist, as he adjusted his arms to hold her up.

“Damn it, I fucking do,” he groaned, moving them towards the bed.

They had just collapsed onto the comforter, kissing like teenagers, when he broke away to breathe, “You’re still going to pay for what you did, though, you’re not getting out of that.”

“Oh, am I, because it seems to me like your mouth is writing checks your body can’t cash… Commander,” she cocked her eyebrow.

His jaw dropped slightly, followed by a shaky inhalation. “…I shouldn’t have told you about my rank thing.”

Her smirk was halfway to a grin by now. “What are you going to do about it?”

He tilted his head. “You’re asking for it, at this point.”

“Well, then, do what you’re going to do, flyboy; that’s an order.”

A wicked smirk quirked the corner of his lips, full of promise. “Yes, Ma’am.”

NMCSD: Naval Medical Center San Diego

The USS Carl Vinson is a Nimitz-class aircraft carrier commissioned in 1982, and she is still on active duty.

I stole @valmare’s headcanon that Tom drives a Chevelle, because if it’s good enough for Mir, it’s good enough for me!

I’m so sorry Mir!

According to a production photo, Tom’s full name is Thomas Jacob Kazansky, but since I headcanon him as Russian, his patronymic is missing.

So thusly, you have Thomas Jacob Vasilyevich Kazansky.

When Mrs. Kazansky refers to Tom as Thomas Vasilyevich, that is considered a casual, informal, yet somehow in its own way, formal, method of referring to someone.

There’s cultural rules about that.

Tom calls Mrs. Kazansky “Mrs. Kazanskaya”, which follows the Russian and Slavic convention of gendered surnames.

CAPs: Combat Air Patrols

Summer whites are the white version of the khaki uniforms, and you can see them in The O Club bar scene in Top Gun ‘86.

“Screw your courage to the sticking place” is a quote from Shakespeare’s “Macbeth”.

Did I basically steal a line from Top Gun, and completely change the context of it?

Yes.

Yes, I did.

Mrs. Kazansky calls Tom simply “Commander” instead of Lieutenant Commander, because of the convention regarding “double-barreled” ranks.

Russian Glossary

Disclaimer: endearments and translations taken from Google—please don’t hesitate to correct me if I’m wrong, which, odds are, I am.

Milaya: dear, darling (there are other translations of this word, however)

Lyubimaya moya: my darling/my one and only sweetheart

Taglist

@valmare

If you’d like to join my taglist, just send me an ask!

[messenger-of-stupidity]

So I went hiking yesterday and climbed on some old lime factory ruins and saw some graffiti. (Lots of it actually.)

So here's what I think the redacted characters would graffiti (if anything):

David: No. He wouldn't graffiti. Man prolly believes in the sanctity of nature and leaving things either as or better than he found it

Angel: Cock and balls.

Asher: Jigglypuff. He wants everyone to behold the splendor.

Baabe: honestly, despite the fact I hc them as an art nerd, I don't think they would graffiti. Maybe with chalk so that way it's temporary. But idk what they would say.

Milo: either "Milo was here" or "Shut up Asher"

Sweetheart: doesn't matter. It's a mess. Because "Art is abstract, Milo. Besides, it kind of looks like that time Aggro spooked you and you shifted and made a mess in our old apartment"

Sam: he wouldn't. He's on the same wavelength as David.

Darlin: some kind of inside joke so that way everyone in the pack (and clan) knows they were there.

Vincent: a purposefully cheesy inspirational quote in the shittiest lettering you've ever seen.

Lovely: a smiley face because they just want their life to calm down so they can enjoy immortality with their stupid boyfriend.

Porter: he wouldn't, but not because he cares about sanctity or whatever. He just doesn't see the point.

Treasure: nah. They don't see the point either. They also don't have a marker or spray paint or anything with them. Porter just kinda zipped them into the middle of fucking nowhere all of the sudden. Somehow they lost a shoe on the way.

Elliot: yes. Boy is making a whole landscape because it's in his DNA and his inner Bob Ross is screaming at him that there's no mistakes, only happy little accidents

Sunshine: they put a sun and a little river for Brachium since he can't deface property with them :(

Blake: he's bringing a powerwasher to destroy all the graffiti

Bestie: they weren't aware it was an option because Blake is sheltering them from the existence of graffiti to keep them pure.

Aaron: no. He doesn't have the time

Smartass: they're busy too.

Ollie: no. He'd rather be inside playing board games

Baby: no, they're inside watching Ollie explain a board game for three hours

Ivan: yeah. Idk what, but he is

(I'm not doing Ivan's listeners)

Guy: it's just memes. There pepe the frog. There's rainbows and telling people that "they're putting chemicals in the water to turn all the frogs gay"

Honey: they put Guy's phone number so he gets spammed because his graffiti tastes are as good as his humor. Make of that what you will.

Geordi: no. He's too anxious about getting in trouble to even think about it.

Cutie: yes. They're putting passing people's thoughts on the wall.

Camelopardalis: no.

(He has too many listeners and I isn't remember them and they dint have enough personality for me to be able to tell)

Vega: no. It's too human.

Warden: once. They felt bad and tried to get rid of it afterwards. It was just a stick figure with horns.

Hush: yes. He saw it once and wanted to try it. Now he's wanted in twelve states for defacing government property. He just copies what he's seen.

Doc: nope. They never understood the draw.

Damien: nope. He's a rule follower

Lasko: no. He's too anxious

Dear: yes. But it's just dad jokes.

Huxley: once. He felt bad about it but it was certainly an experience. It was a tree and a stick dude.

Gavin: absolutely. It's hilarious. It ranges from just crude jokes to just random circles. No one knows the meeting, but it's becoming like a mini legend in Dahlia. If you find the holy circle (because it's a perfect circle. He has good wrist control) you have to leave an offering. He's making a cult by accident but he still finds it funny

Freelancer: yes, but only because Caelum saw Gavin doing it and thought it looked like fun and he wanted Freelancer's help.

Caelum: he drew a bunch of shaky smiley faces to "brighten peoples day. Because when they see all these smiles, they'll want to smile too, and that will make them feel good. Which makes me feel good. Which helps me make others feel good. Which makes me feel goo-"

Morgan: no.

Seer obscura: no. But they were tempted to give vague warnings to people to try to help them

[mr-and-mr-diaz]

My thoughts on 7x06:

KEVIN AND CHIMNEY YOU HAVE MY WHOLE HEART

This was basically Chimney's version of a coma episode

The episode wasn't as confused and muddled as I was expecting, which was great! Was super coherent, unlike the acid trip of 7x05

However, the episode still had a rushed feeling to it, and not in a "satisfying fast clip" kinda way, more the "OMG so much to cover so little time ahhhhh" kinda way.

Kenneth Choi and Jennifer Love Hewitt are GREAT actors!! Really brought all the feels

LOVE how stripped back and simple Madney's wedding was in the end. Somehow that was SO THEM. And Bobby officiating was chef's kiss.

Buck outing himself with a soot beard was VERY HIM. My guy you don't got 2 brain cells to rub together (affectionate)

Buddie partying it up in the beginning is even more hilarious now that we know that they didn't lose track of Chimney, lol he was never there

No one else was there, really. Everyone ditched except Eddie. And so the two bisexually dressed men enjoyed someone else's bachelor party wrapped up in each other (I HAVE THOUGHTSSSS)

I still don't care for Tommy beyond a vague "he's nice." Happy for Buck's journey though, but praying bucktommy isn't endgame, at the end of the day it's just one more rushed, underdeveloped relationship for Buck, the fact that it's with a man, while cool, doesn't change that underlying emptiness of an underdeveloped relationship with someone who isn't the person I've been rooting for and they've been building for actual YEARS.

Hot take: Tommy has better chemistry with Eddie than he does with Buck. Not that I ship Eddie and Tommy, this is more a roundabout way of saying I genuinely don't see much chemistry between bucktommy tbh. Like the writers mashing 2 Ken dolls together. And this isn't me talking smack, I'm just observing what I see. Like the kiss was well timed and well executed, but it didn't make me sHivEr the way it does with two actors who SPARK, you know what I mean? (examples of kisses that SPARKED: RWRB first kiss, timlucy from The Rookie is a great example (when that happened I held my freaking breath), Oliver and Felicity from Flash was INSANE. Like you know when the magic is there, and for these two... they're cute? But they're not IT.)

As long as I'm dropping hot takes: Hen saying "It's about time" felt very fanfiction-y to me. Like it's likely that she's observed a thing or two (she's sharp and has eyes and gets to watch buddie hanging out FREQUENTLY) but narratively and on-screen there were no breadcrumbs leading us to that moment. There was never a moment we saw onscreen where she was wondering "huh, I think Buck is bi," even by dint of facial expression, which means that moment wasn't paying off anything, and because of that it felt so... fanservice-y.

[t0ast-ghost]

Episode 23 (Space Seed) it’s kind of funny to me how many of these I’ve made by this point. I think only…62 to go? That seems like accurate math skills.

Let’s just fuckin go:

- “I can’t understand why it always gives you pleasure to see me wrong” already starting this, are we?

- WAIT WHAT isn’t Botany Bay from… eugenics war… khan?? (Thought this was a different episode)

- McCoy and Spock just fight, they’re like two cats who will just attack each other. They just will fight right with Kirk between them.. I feel sorry for whatever poor bastard gets put between them, like take this to another room gentlemen

- “Care to join the landing party, doctor?” “Well if you’re actually giving me a choice-” “I’m not” he’s so salty today

- “Here’s a chance for the historian to do something” lol poor historians

- Who wrote this episode? They’re so sassy today

- “You’re an old fashioned boy, McCoy.” did he know it would rhyme?

- wait… KHAN IS FROM 1990s??? Does he know what a teletubbie is?

- haha Kirk you do not know what you’re unleashing

- What is Spock looking at on that tiny ass screen in his corner of the bridge

- Jim Kirk as a psychologist? Literally just let me suffer

- NONONO DINT GURT MCCOY

- “Well either choke me or cut my throat make up your mind.” No survival instincts, none. What why would you say this Bones?! And then he continues to explain how to kill him “I was just trying to avoid an argument.”

- DO NOT give this man access to your ships blueprints

- Kirk took Spock’s chair so Spock simply sits on the control panel

- MCGIVERS GET OUT OF THERE, do not engage with him

- The way Spock says “whip” with a little extra “whuh”

- Nono Spock is quite right, what the fuck, he was a tyrant don’t admire him

- Can you not leave the bridge from anywhere but the turbo lift? That’s a fire hazard

- “Every person on the bridge will suffocate.” Kirk looks directly at Spock and only Spock

- WHY are you wasting your air on a captains log

- wow historians suck

- “Take Mr Spock next” McCoy looks so worried

- Why would you need this chamber for medical reasons

- Kirk stunt double, I cannot express to you how obvious it looks (cool fight tho)

- That little bell is so stupid, I wouldn’t be able to not laugh

- WAIT they’re letting them go? He’s awful

- McCoy kinda just had to sit there

The credits have a blurry picture of Spock punching Kirk which is… what is that

Masterpost

[weightedblankettt]

nicovid works well platonically but i really like it romantically. taking someone who’s desperate to survive (nico) and pairing them with someone who views his own life as worthless (david) is already an interesting dynamic, but when its paired up with their actual personalities it just adds a layer of bittersweetness to it. nico, someone who’s been tormented their entire life, and david, who’s basked in the attention of everyone around him for years. nico, who was bullied for being themselves, and david, who was praised for being someone else. nico, who’s shy, david, who’s outgoing at first but slowly devolves into someone cynical. i do like their dynamic pre-freakout, its very cute and could lead to nico breaking out of their shell, i find their post-freakout dynamic much more interesting. nico and david both have a common denominator: they did something bad and will most likely be ostracized because of it. seeing as they both know how it feels to be set aside as the odd one out (nico through their bullying, david through never feeling as if his true feelings are enough for others) and they both have similar character relationships. (disdain towards ace, fallen-through friendship with hu). i feel like given david’s clear self-esteem issues, nico’s blunt manner of speech won’t be seen as insulting by david, and that lets them learn how to speak their mind. i see their dynamic as someone who wraps himself in a lie, and one of the only people that can see through him. even during the trial, nico’s one of the three people out of the cast of 13 students attending the second trial that notices david’s bullshitting about killing arei, alongside the protag and the support. idk if this is plot armoring my favs or whatever but i do think that nico can read people well, similarly to the animals they work with (considering their occupation: pet *therapy*) and david’s tendency to lie might not really fool them. they can both depend on each other when they need to, but they also do have their own problems and stuff. their development in canon chapter 3 could be interesting if they do end up talking to each other, especially if nico does end up becoming a chapter three victim. another thing that really intrigues me about them is how they’ve both committed an irredeemable action. david’s trying to get them all killed by pretending to have killed arei after all, and nico tried to kill ace. they’re both one of the “bad people” of the second chapter, and i can heavily emphasize (empathy =/= sympathy by the way.) despite their contrasting personalities and themes. it emphasizes how anyone is capable of doing bad, even someone seemingly kind and timid or someone seemingly well-intentioned. nico really has no room to speak on david’s shortcomings and vice versa, and i doubt that either of them want to. they provide each other with a safe space that neither of them really deserve, but it’s still comfortable to have and they enjoy it. david, although his nihilistic tendencies are on display, probably still can’t help but accommodate for nico if they ever started dating or going out. maybe not immediately after— he’d probably still be cruel, but nico wouldn’t really mind. they both let each other say what they’re thinking freely, without caring much for their words, but one thing leads to another and they cant help but fall in love. they both accommodate for each other. nico tries to help david with his honesty and his feelings, because they can’t control their own feelings OR how honest they are (even if its insulting,) and david takes care of nico when they can’t take care of themselves. gaah i lovw them.

this sounds insane? thats because it is. i dint know what the fuck im takjing about but they make me happy and sad. their entire dynamic can be described as one thing: bittersweet

[bigmack2go]

Ive never been more pissed than when i found out aki max and Audrey didn’t end up together. Not like usually tho. This isn’t me goinh *ugh but i ship them so much“ no. I couldn’t care less about whether i like their ship or not. Thsi is about polyamory representation. They build up two seasons like that, finally giving you hope of seeing a poly couple that doesn’t end bad. In the first season k might have been like „oh this is bait“ but then they actually got together and i was so happy. But no. You give me yet another polyamorous story that end in betrayal. You guve me one single poly couple and call it representation and then they end bad?

The fact that they actually were together doesnt make it better.

Every poly representation EVER ends up bad. In betrayal. (Thats exactly what poly ISNT about.) what picture do you think that paints us in?? And especially when you KNOW that its always like that, how dare you be apart of it??? This is like when the only gay character turns out to be the villain, the only female character being the love interest (?) the only black character doing a shooting the only muslim character being a therrorist: WRONG

I am NEVER one to compare minorities experiences to each other but i simplycant keep going know that EVERYONE pretends that poly people aren’t a minority. Sure you SAY that you know that but you don’t treat us as such. And by „treat us as a minority“ i do not mean under representation till the cows come home. Im not talking about conservatives treating me as a minority, in talking about progressive people. Im talking about putting up a fight to let us get our rights like everyone else.

because lets face it, they dont treat us the same way they treat other minorities. Maybe they put a little rep here and there (which is almost always BAD rep) but thats it.

(For the sake of authenticity i‘m gonna use gay as an example for these because thats a minority that im actually a part of and i dont wanna put myself in anyone else’s shoes)

„you dint have to include poly characters if youre not comfortable woth it“ BULLSHIT.

That is like saying „you dont have to include characters if youre not comfortable woth it“

If you heard that, would you go „oh that’s fine“ NO. You would not. Because even if you are a straight person who would feel uncomfortable having gay sex or a gay relationship, that does not make gay people less existent and therefore not representing them is not okay.

THIS IS THE SAME FUCKING THING. I dont CARE if you would have a threesome or not (EVEN I WOULDNT AND IM POLY). I exist! And just because you aren’t me, that doesn’t make me less existent?! So get your damn shit together.

Sire polyamory isnt for everyone. NO SHIT. But neither is homosexuality and is it okay to leave that out? No. It fucking isnt.

And to get back to wjat this all was originally about: BAD REPRESENTATION IS WORSE THAN NO REPRESENTATION BECAUSE IT PUTS US INTO A BAD LIGHT ESPECIALLY WHEN THE ONLY REPRESENTATION EVER EXISTING IS ALWAYS BAD ONE.

I think the only representation of polyamory that wasn’t bad is have ever seen in my entire life was half bad. And even that was left open (enough) at the end.

So no DONT TALK TO ME IM ON A RAMPAGE AND I AM NOT OVER REACTING. LET POLYAMORY EXIST FOR FUCKS SAKE

FUCK THIS FUCK EVERYONE. FUCK POLY PPL NOT BEING SEEN

Im so fucking done with this shit

The same tjing is for nonbinary people. I could go on a rampage about this too but i would literally only repeat myself for almost everything

Putting a lot of random tags cuz i want ppl to see this

[unforth]

Well I still feel pretty terrible and I slept like garbage but I had a thought in the middle of the night and I think there's something in it and that's Tian Guan Ci Fu focusing on characters who grew up isolated, who had lonely childhoods, and how it fucked them all up in different ways. Like hardly a single character in it had a healthy childhood (for those whose childhoods we know about), and this being a major theme is lampshaded by the few children in the book - Guzi, who every single "good" person in the book still allows to stay with Qi Rong, and Cuocuo, who is a literally a dead fetus but who still responds to maternal affection, and Lang Ying, and the dead baby.

So like:

Xie Lian, lonely, isolated, and treated as inhuman/perfect

Hua Cheng, isolated because of his fate, abused for his appearance

Qi Rong, mental illness ignored and left untreated

Mu Qing, abused for being poor

Feng Xin, isolated by dint of being the prince's sole companipn

Quan Yizhen, abused for being different/"acting weird" (being autistic, imo)

Banyue, abused for being of mixed heritage

He Xuan, cursed

Meanwhile, their stories are often contrasted directly against those people who had a supposedly more normal experience - like Yin Yu and Quan Yizhen, where Yin Yu has a solid community (but that community is actually toxic, see also how they all treat Quan Yizhen and somehow treat the results as Yin Yu's responsibility), and the Shi family versus He Xuan (except Shi Wudu is an awful person which leads to, ya know, everything - this one is the most direct and obvious contrast since He Xuan's ruined childhood and life are the direct result of Shi Wudu's actions to protect his in group with zero regard for anyone in the outgroup who might get hurt), and the Peis contrasted with Banyue (while Pei Xiu cared for Banyue there must have been background familial pressure on him not to interact, or else she wouldn't have been starving on the streets and wouldn't have had to rely on Xie Lian, and meanwhile Pei Ming's "family" - his army - ultimately betrays him while claiming to act for him.)

And of course, the Prince of Wuyong with his harem, uh, I mean four BFFs who helped him govern, compared with Xie Lian, who has only himself, Feng Xin, and Mu Qing - as in three teenagers being left to fend basically for themselves in the face of kingdom-shattering disaster. And there's also Jun Wu's construction of heaven, held together by the glue of manipulation and forced conformity with so many scandals kept under wraps. (Yes I've read the whole book. I'm trying to keep this readable for people who haven't. If you've also read the whole thing you can easily carry this paragraph to a logical conclusion about Jun Wu's actions in heaven.)

Idk that I've got enough brain to tie this all together with a neat bow, but I just feel like there's something here, about how hard so many of these people try to do the right thing but it's difficult because of their harm caused to them by the neglect and abuse of their childhood, and about how family and support networks only function to help if those supports aren't broken and toxic, about how the found family Xie Lian ultimately manages to construct functions because they all love each other despite their baggage instead of constantly being on the lookout for how to tear each other down over the least sign of nonconformity.

I hope this is coherent. Idk just, since I've been sick I've just reread like more than half of the book in less than a week (English books 3, 4, and 5) and it's giving me thoughts.

[ryutarotakedown]

Ace attorney? 001 for the ask game

[ask game link] ACE!!! ATTORNEY!!!!! okay im going with original trilogy for this because the prequels and sequels are both their own thing so [cracks knuckles]

Favorite character: oh god ive got a “no opinion” for the first damn question uhhh. im going to go with pearl because i think she is underappreciated. pearly pearls pearl fey i love you im sorry your mother sucks

Least Favorite character: mmmmm writing-wise would be terry fawles. in-game-wise would be morgan fey easily what a woman! i love hating her. one of the most chilling depictions of controlling parents ive come across ever

5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon): okay i can’t forget platonic ships this time. in no particular order: narumitsu, franmaya, nick & maya & pearl, iris & everyone but especially edgeworth, and. blanks. MIEGO I CANT BELIEVE I FORGOT THEM

Character I find most attractive: phoenix. sorry.

Character I would marry: no one in these games is marriage material thats why i love them. okay thats not true i’d probably marry bikini

Character I would be best friends with: phoenix again. charmed by his hater swag.

A random thought: recipe for turnabout was good okay no where are you going

— i just. yes the stuff with jean sucks majorly (i went in armed with janet hsu’s trivia that he is meant to be a cis gay drag-performing guy and thus had a better experience than most people did i think) but the last turnabout was fucking spectacular. i love when phoenix straight up lies.

An unpopular opinion: crap, but that just now *was* my unpopular opinion! okay uhh. i really like how godot and iris and misty have the exact same guilt complex going on. i think if you have different opinions on the three of them you are somewhat missing the point (like yes misty did abandon her children and yes godot is mean sometimes but like. at their core. they are So Much the same and that is what destroys them and also what starts off bridge to the turnabout.)

— also i think that aa4 should have been phoenix and maya destroying the death penalty because they’ve realized that the truth is necessary yes but also punishment does not work and will never get only the imaginary perfect bad person because all aa villains are human but especially in the end with godot. and then they should deal with the ramifications of the fact that this means morgan will not be subjected to the death penalty

— OH ALSO phoenix was absolutely in the right to take pearl along to investigations in jfa 2-4. can you imagine being what, 8 years old, and your only family left in the entire world is kidnapped, and your other only family left in the entire world fucking leaves you because you’re a kid and ooh kids shouldn’t be exposed to violence ooh? i would have killed phoenix wright. i don’t care if gumshoe babysits her or she gets sent to a daycare or something i would have still killed him. she deserves to be up to date on everything she deserves to see him at his most honest

My canon OTP: miego because i mean. they Are the only canon otp. unless you allow platonic otps in which case it’s nick & maya & pearl again

Non-canon OTP: narumitsu. i am basic and proud.

Most badass character: phoenix and franziska are wrestling for that spot and franziska is winning by sheer dint of the fact that she is 18 years old and fucking Did All Of That while alone and scared and 18 years old

Pairing I am not a fan of: i respect multishipping but i cannot fucking do it for the life of me so like. pretty much anything i have not listed above. wait no lanamia’s fine. everything other than the above and lanamia

Character I feel the writers screwed up: uhhhhhhh hm. not really anyone… larry i suppose? i don’t actually think they did him that badly though, im very invested in him & pearly bonding in heavenly hall. i do also think maya should have gotten some more time to shine in bridge but that’s not a fault of her characterization.

— OH WAIT NO everyone in big top who was in that love triangle except regina. i like all of them as characters and do not want any of them to be predators thanks. I genuinely think it’d be so good if ben max and bat were all 16-18 it drives in the whole “younger than you think they are” theme with franziska

Favorite friendship: nick and maya. of course. honorable mention to larry and pearl who i think discover that they are aromantic together

[charlesemersonwinchesteriii]

for the 'why wouldn't date them'

charles, hawkeye, trapper

and i think you might be into twin peaks? if so, dale cooper and donna hayward

whichever ones you want to do :)

Ahhhhhh omg thank you for all of these I want to do them ALL but let's go backwards.

Donna Hayward

Ok so the thing is I AM into Twin Peaks but it's been a while since I've seen it and I tried to watch The Return but I was too stupit to understand much less enjoy it :( sowwy. So I would be dating my own flawed incomplete interpretation of a person, really. Typical Twin Peaks. 

Anyways I love Donna! I think we have similar personalities and stuff. In all brutal honesty I think if I were in her situation with a friend like Laura I’d have done similar things. Also yeah maybe her actions did lead a man to suicide but that was NOT her fault. I think the only three things that would prevent an attempt at a relationship here are 

1) The obvious. Her taste in men = atrocious. In all the rest of these hypotheticals where the character is already canonically in a relationship or has feelings for another character I’m just like yeah the more the merrier but if Donna insists on inviting her insufferable ass boyfriend into the mix I could NOT fucking do it I’m sorry. 

2) This girl is not ready for a relationship yet after All That god damn. But then again neither am I so maybe that balances out. We would need to spend some time as support group buddies just hugging and crying a lot before even considering a date. 

3) It is unlikely we would ever interact as I am never setting foot in that town ever in my life are you kidding me. Donna is super pretty in both her incarnations but I’m sorry I don’t think any pussy pops severely enough for me to risk going to fucking doorknob hell or some shit.

Dale Cooper

Ignore everything I said in that last paragraph. I change my mind. I forgot my beautiful autism creature husband is here. I would risk it all for a date with Dale Cooper and so would all who know and perceive the truth. AND he’s got two hot girlfriends with him at least one of whom is ALSO an autism creature??? Sign me the FUCK up for this polycule IMMEDIATELY. “Oh but OP what about the horrors” I don’t even fucking care it’s fine. Dale can have little an evil doppelganger. As a treat.

Still there are some problems:

1) Dale is an FBI agent and Harry is a cop. Booooooo!!!! But maybe if Annie and Caroline and I unionize we can force them to quit their jobs. 

2) Unclear if I would be forced to join the Black Lodge Horror Vision Rotation along with Annie and Caroline. Boring and time consuming task and unlike Laura you don’t even get to do a Big Scream.

3) I personally actually don’t like pie or coffee at all :( I’m sorry babygirl I understand if this is a deal breaker. 

Trapper McIntyre 

You know that “golden retriever boyfriend” joke? Trapper is like THE golden retriever boyfriend to me. Which I mean as an absolute compliment! Golden retrievers are friendly, helpful, adorable, lovable dogs. I am always up to pet a golden retriever.

But the thing is, I would never get one myself. They’re just a bit too big, bit too much energy, bit too messy, and anyways I prefer cats. No hate, no judgment, just a series of tiny preferences. Not into jocks, not into casual no-strings-attached type relationships, not super into kids, you know how it is. Boring and petty answer but I just feel like this adorable happy-go-lucky goldie deserves the PERFECT forever home and obviously he’s one of the most popular of all the dogs at the Mashblr shelter so I know he’ll get adopted super fast. So I can turn my attention to the miserable ass overbred old cat in the corner <3

Hawkeye Pierce

Oh, Hawkeye. I just don’t think so. Idk what’s wrong with me but I have to work to see Hawkeye as like. A dateable entity in my mind. He’s our little scrunkly! It’d be weird to date a scrunkly. BUT maybe I’ve just been overexposed to him purely by dint of being in the fandom he’s the main character of, because objectively I DO find Mr. Alda’s portrayal of him in certain scenes to be Attractive (TM), and seeing clips of his charisma and charm and humor and all that good handsome stuff is literally what got me to check out the show in the first place! Man. What happened. Hmm. 

I think one issue is that scenes where he’s explicitly trying to be Romantic and/or Seductive have just never done it for me. Like comparing Hawkeye’s lovey scenes with Kyung Soon to Charles’ with Martine, there’s no contest in how they make me feel. To me, Hawkeye is honestly at his most appealing when he’s radiating Friend Energy, which is why his casual relationships actually work really well IMO; you feel like he’s truly a great pal to the nurses he hooks up with. This is also, I think, one of Piercintyre’s great strengths as a ship, because Hawkeye and Trapper both have amazing Friend Energy and then their natural compatibility makes that bleed seamlessly into sweet romantic vibes. And to be clear I would LOVE to be in a Friends To Lovers relationship too but unfortunately I am cringely obsessed with loveydovey romance in a way I���m not sure Hawkeye is even capable of. Plus there’s also just the fact that I’m a shy waiting til marriage person and I suck at banter and yeah it’s just not working. In conclusion neither Hawkeye nor Trapper should date me they should date each other!! But we knew that :P

THAT CUNT

There are 10000000 reasons not to date Charles. But I will be doing it anyways ^_^ Peace and love on planet earth <3

Anyways I’m not bringing up his Problematicness as a reason here because I didn’t bring it up for anyone else and nobody noticed, so why should it be any different with him. Like no obviously I would not date this dumbfuck racist but I also would not date a guy who thinks it’s a funny prank to make a woman think she’s being sexually assaulted. I also for that matter would not date a guy who works with the dumbfuck racist and is like aw, ya know what, he’s not that bad really :) the second they have a chance to have a bonding moment. I guess I have decided to be a buzzkill about that forever now btw sorry :( oh well 

But ok no real talk I would Not date Charles unless one very specific condition is met, which is that I have whatever magic stardust they sprinkled on his single-episode love interests before they put them in the story that made him be utterly besotted with them, because more than any other character on the show, it seems, the difference between Regular Charles and Charles In Love is so hysterically huge??? Like fuck. My dudes. We’ve done it. We found the one villain who actually does do a complete 180 and starts trying to act right as soon as a girl takes pity on him enough to look at him twice. (Disclaimer: I haven’t seen Ain’t Love Grand yet I’m sorryyyyyyyy) He’s so ~romantic~ and it’s like catnip to me unfortunately. :\ The total opposite of what I said about Hawkeye up there. Offers a girl his stupid little teacup and recites poetry at her. Unbelievable. Did anyone ever think about the fact that maybe I would like to be offered a teacup and recited poetry at. No. You all only think about yourselves.  

Like even though objectively the way he nukes his relationship with Martine was hurtful to both of them, he’s so Tender the whole time it’s insane. She turned him into her pauvre petit miaou miaou overnight. I want that power so fucking bad I NEED that power so fucking bad. Say it with me everyone. I Could Fix Him. (”But OP Martine and Donna DIDN’T fix him he still left them both and never mentioned them again?” Yes but don’t worry they were just loosening the lid on his jar a little bit. I’ll get him open you’ll see. He’s gonna be soooo well trained when I’m done I’ll make him apologize to Maxwell and everything. He won’t even need the shock collar after a few weeks.)

But yeah if I have to like, try to appeal to him on my own it’s not fucking happening. I have no desire to hear the equivalent of a DOS deepfake hologram that has become evil due to being trained on text scraped from youtube comments tell me I’m ugly and stupid, which is exactly what would happen. Up til now I’ve sidestepped the issue that I do not think any of these people would give me the time of day (except Maxwell who would take pity on me probably because he is sososo Good) but I cannot ignore how much Charles just would Not like me. I don’t know how the selfshipper community does it they’re braver than any fucking US marine over there fr. Charles would look at me like I was a gross little bug on the ground and I can’t escape it. Oh well. Who needs him. Where’s your sister you dipshit I’m about to GET IT

[tinyorangepotato]

o this is not one of my better days. I had to go to my aunts today and then go to my job at hollister. should've been fine. I woke up at like 9 still tired hut fuck it dude and left to go shopping for my aunt at 10:30 ish trying to get to timing right so she doesn't know I have shit to do at 2. forgot my wallet. okay thays fine. I'll be a little off schedule but nothing major. went grocery shopping for her and I just got 70 bucks so I'm not as broke so I got myself some yogurt since there's fuck all in the house. turns out my grandparents (the ones that I live with and they own the house) are gonna be gone till Sunday. so I go to my aunts and clean the bathroom and cut up cantaloupe and do everything I need to yknow. planning on leaving around 1:45 so I get to work on time and then I opened the back door and my other aunts dog comes barking and running down stairs. I bring her in (since my other aunt thats the dogs owner isn't home which is why she came downstairs) and go to get my stuff and leave and my aunt asks me to stay for 10 more minutes. what the fuck. I gotta because I don't want to answer any questions about me having a second job and blah blah blah so I leave 10 fucking minutes late and get to work 10 minutes late (i think it was 13 to be exact) and then normal shift. I'm upset about the being late because I accidentally didn't go to my shift on Sunday and that was my second scheduled day so I dotn wanna be late anymore but fuck it dude.

fairly normal shift. just making sure the place looks nice and everything is folded and in size order and all that. there's other workers that come and introduce themselves to me and vise versa but other than that I was silent the whole shift. fucking everyone else is talking to each other and making conversation as they fold but not me. I'm not one to start conversation or intrude into someone else's and then we're mainly in the men's and at the counter while I was folding the women's so ye. I did put my own headphones in for a while which was a plus.

leaving for some reason I want to cry. mainly because of the not getting talked to yknow. like I know it's nothing personal but do I just have the vibe of don't tlak to me. or I was moving around yoo much (there was like nothing to do after I tucked the tags in the Jean wall so I was walking around making sure everything is in size order all over the store)

I also almsot cried when I leftmy aunts because I was gonna run late. and the more I think about how I've been ready to cry most of today the more I want to cry.

left for home and fuck yes. I can smoke and not care if I smell like weed because everyone else alreayd knows I smoke and mt grandparents are gone. nope. get home and my fucjing aunt (actual aunt. not great aunts like before) car is here and so my cousin which most of the time just annoys me by being in the same room is there. I also look in the mirror and my hair has been looking dumb as shit the past few days and today's no different. fucking hate my face and the shape of my head and the look of ym hair and just fuckijg wverythign. usually I'll look in the mirror and mess with or just run ym hands through my hair just because but no I had to immediately or else I would've started crying.

now I'm not high, crying out on the backyard swing (like a bench swing yknow?) and typing this because I ditn want to bother my one friend with it because who cares and I am not going to put it in a vent chat because my other friend will definitely see it and that's emotional vulnerability and I don't liek that.

there's no fucking reason for me to be feeling like this. nothing actually happened today and maybe I'm gonna start my period but I got no clue because that bitch is so irregular I really should see a doctor about that but I don't want to see a gynecologist because that's my privates and I dint want to take any pills because I still can't swallow them and I don't want shots or whatever and now I'm just actually rambling.

[spilltheteawithme]

Imagine being this delulu😂 I don't know what happemed in this people head but this shpuld be study. 1) people who scream dont insult aw love everyone are the same people whow hate on aw, galacy on top of them. How aw is so different hmmm? She is not, they both do similar stupid ftuff, bait etc. So why you hate one but love another? We probably never know 2) I feel reall really bad for them, how they live in real world when people have different ipinions is a mystery. Peope like different things, have different opinions, and belive me they can be mire agressif when they protect them than this blogs on tumblr. This is just duscusion, someone say aw is bad person ok they can feel like that, they say she is bad actres ok they watch movies with her and dont like it, they say she us hungry for fame and do pr ok again just opinion plus look how she act, this is not someone who dont care about fame who is so in love and secure. She might not be evil but lets face it she show her bad/weird side and people point this out. But you say we can't or this is not true, get in tuch with reality different opinions exist 3) i just mention it but the fact that aw is just a normal person, she is nit some super activist and do weird stuff fact that in eyes of shippers she become a saint is crazy. Maybe thats why people who dont like her push back so hard? Noone is perfect but you find excuse fir her every move, why the need? 4) Im trully concern that shippers go from 'you say that things because you whant to sleep with seb and he will never sleep with you, he have aw and they do it every hour' to ' we print tumblr blogs to give to seb'🙄. God how this go so far, every artist or actor have like you whant to call it hate, look at any big names in hw and im sure you will find it. Plus what actually is in your head, how you think this will go? You what stop him and force this in his hand ? Just say what you will say to him at loud sometimes is good to hear what you think to see how syupid it sound. 'Hi, we are your fans and we collect this blogs on tumblr that dont support your relation with aw and we print evidence just for you'? or 'yous should read this people hate you in this blog'? He probably kniw, but kniw and see are to different things , and that will be a great way to destroy his good day. Plus what he will do, look for anons? Spend his whole day on tumblr? No, he dint care that much and you look stupid. You reall whant to makr him rethink wht he ever go there. And last thunk my personal opinion that this is suck, sick that people loose themself in this to the point they taking internet stuff to real live, your line between what is real and not is blurry at this point its scary that sime people feel the need to win internet srgument that dint effect their live so mutch thst in their heads they belive this is right thing to do.

Exactly, what are they saying as they hand this over?! He knows not everyone is going to like someone. He knows not everyone will agree and he chooses for his own mental health to avoid all the drama, that seems to build on the shippers side only to come over and argue because we have different views. What is he going to do?

[lowcosmic]

Cosmic! Im so sorry, really sorry about the bible that I gonna to say you, but I have to said it, just think its like free gossip or I dont know beocaouse if I dont take this whith a little humor I will end up crying again so Yep 😋

Do you remember ths I have a boyfriend? Well he is not my boyfriend anymore! :3 becouse the guy dint want to change. (Okay this is going to be long i guess and its not necesary to read it it)

Okay so as you I "repair" the thing whith him like one week ago, so the monday I come back to school and well since i already talked whith him I was guessing that he understands the thing that I say to him but I seems like no becouse that day he was acting the same way, he goes whith his friends and dosent even say like "hi how are you" no like he just go and ignore me again and well I was sad becouse we already talked about it, but since that day I have the idea of broke up whit him, the tuesday one of my friends that is also friends whit him advise him of that and tells him that he going to need to put limits to repair the things. But no he dosent change

Well to resume this all of the rest of the week he was whit the same actitude and today I broke whit him becouse I was really damaging me, my life has not been the best this moths and he wanst helping in fact he just make it worse, becouse actually my mental health is in a not really good state becouse of problems of my life, but the are been months that I dint feel to bad to dint even want to wake or do something, or just want to sleep and to fell so nervious generally about all the things that I have to try and distract my self whit everything just no enter to a bad state and have more problems, and well in this last week I wasnt felling secure around him, like I was so like I dont know, ¿scared of him? Of something like that becouse everytime that I see him It make wnat to cry and for my bad luck we go in the same bus and we actually live to close so we have to idt together and that was like the worse thing that happen in this week.

But well that's not the theme really, today I broke whith him in the recess and I fell bad becouse he dosent seem to care about it like when I broke whin him he just said me "I you fell rithg like that is okay, I supose you to say me that becouse someone told me" And the he just go like nothing, maybe a little bit angry but when I see him in the recess he seem like so happy whtih his friends like I was just something insignificant when I was trembling, about to cry, scared, nervous I wasnt felling good (and actually I cried but later like 15min later) and he was just like 😃, you know some hours ago I was over thinking again I was thinking what did he just do whit all the things o gifted to him becouse I scared that he throw him to the thrash or something like that when I put so much effort and that things literaly I make him a cake to his birthday beocaouse I want want to be happy in his birthday and now wacht me felling like the dumbest, stupid, girl in the world! :D I am feliing so bad beocaouse of him and he is just like nothing happen I just not fair :(

-🫧

that’s a walking red flag boyfriend right there. you’re amazing for breaking up with him! HE DOES NOT DESERVE YOU. a person like that who doesn’t even appreciate anything you do for him is a waste of time. and the fact that he didn’t care afterwards?

you deserve SO much better. and i know everyone else will agree that you do , because you’re such an awesome human being and you don’t deserve to be treated this way !!

i hope your mental health gets better , but just remember , we’re here to support you all the way !! 💕

[ineedacalicocat]

LMAO Tae didn't have nothing to do with JK social media wise until after he followed Jennie. That day he followed Je, then unfollowed her, he posted that first pic of him & Jk caused a firestorm. he knew that day, tkk would forgive & defend him for anything. So he used him again when his scandal with Je started heating up. Tae only cares about TAE. Not Jimin, not JK. He is making sure to keep his fans fed before his album drops. Tkk are his biggest supporters. He knows exactly what he's doing.

Yeah i agree with that why are you so angry?

But didnt jk also posted a pic with tae? He even liked his pics right? I mean i dont remember that much but really i dont care about tae actually. To me he is the mist boring member out of all of them. And the most jeaolous and fake. I actually feel bad for jungkook because he is becoming more like him. But to each their own i guess.

To those of you who think jimin and jungkook is in closet and ignoring each other just so shippers dint come for them is so blind cause even if thats true jungkook is still the shittiest person. Cause he literally mocked his boyfriend with his fake boyfriend. They literally sat their eatched the mv and mocked him. And he can tell this so easily with laughing. He always does that actually. If thats ehat their relationship is i hope it ends soon or if they broke up the thank god. Cause jimin deserves better. Jimin also deserves a better soulmate. Maybe like jhope. Like the guy is the only one who likes or replies to his pictures on insta. Even tae is so called soulmate is not to be seen anywhere. This is the problem with this fandom they made up somethings and go along with it and think their relationships will stay like that. That soulmate thing ende like in 2017. Even jungkook was a much better soulmate for him but it was like between 2017-18 or 2019ish sfter that it ended. Jimin is too mature for jk. Jk is still like a baby. I dont think jm wants to deal with him. Like he even mentioned how to comes to his room so late. I think it was jimin saying you see the shit im dealing with? This mf doesnt even let me sleep. But even than when jimin mentioned that jungkook immedetily backed down and was like i go because i feel alone xbxjsj like wtf was that just smile and nod and say yeah i do that s lot. Instead hid face become so angry djsjsjsj wtf what i hate id this things happening and people are still blind and want maknae line to be that best friends which they are absolutely not.

[maizumis]

— HAIKYUU BOYS WHEN YOU DONT SAY 'I LOVE YOU' BACK

ft. timeskip! matsukawa issei, suna rintarou, akaashi keiji, tendou satori, sugawara koushi

note: female reader❗ had a hard time writing tendou 😭😭

❦ ISSEI was getting ready for work, putting on his usual white dress shirt and that cologne you loved so much, you already thougth about this prank for quite a time now, and this was the perfect moment "okay love, wait me for dinner, i love you, im gonna get going" you didn't even bother to take your eyes from your phone "okay issei, have fun with the dead" he was about to close the appartment door, key word: was "arent you forgetting something, doll?" perfect, your plan is going perfect "mmm i don't think so, i actually did all the chores in the morning so i could have the rest of the day free" he sighs, unsatisfasied with your answer "okay then, i love you" he is leaning in the door frame, waiting for your answer with a frustread look on his face "issei you good? its getting late" he gives up, he needed that your reply before going to work "doll dont do this to me, i love you, please tell me you love me" he tells you with a litlle pain in his voice and you knew the joke was over "i love you issei very, very much in fact" you say while going to him, placing your hand in the fabric that was on his chest "finally doll, i love you more" and before going he gives you a sweet, deep and quick kiss, of course, he is late after all

❦ SUNA and you were napping on the couch, ignoring all the responsbailities you two could have, enjoying eachothers presence with out exchangin any words, it was a rainy day and that screamed movies and cuddles together. a friend told you to do this joke on him after you told her how clingy he was when both of you were lying somewhere togheter. "you know i love you, rigth?" and he is in for the game "yeah i know rin, you made it very clear this last few years" he moves his head litlle, trying to process what you just said to him "rin? why you moving? you uncomfy bub?" he pouts like a two year old that can't touch fire "im not uncomfy, im actually unloved, my own girlfriend doesn't love me anymore" you were trying your best not to laugth at his childish reaction "and who told you that i dont love you" he gasped, how did you have the audacity to say that to him? "actually my oh so called girlfriend didn't told me 'i love you' back, so i think im currently single" and that made you snap "suna rintaro! you are my man and i hope its clear to you, i love you so much, my man, only mine" now he his the one laughing at your childish remark "jealous i see? but yes bub, only yours, forever and ever"

❦ AKAASHI was getting out of bed aerly as usual so he could go to work, he did his usual rutine and had a coffee, a thing that he called it a very good breakfast; the las thing he did was giving you a soft kiss in your forehead while you were still sleeping "i love you sweet thing, rest well" with sleepy eyes, groogy mouth and morning scent you told him "good luck, keiji" uh? maybe it slipped her mind, he thougth. his day as work was hard, he had this uneasy feeling in his heart and couldnt stop thinking about it, is she feeling loved? the moment he got home he was already backhugging you "i missed you today, how did you do?" you were happy to see him, finally you were waiting for him all day "hi keiji, i missed you a lot too, i actually started the book you were telling me about it and you're rigth! its awesome" he knows you are alrigth but he needs to ask so the feeling inside him would let him free "hey... do you still love me?" it came out more as a whisper, a litlle scared for your answer "of course i love you keiji, why would i stop loving you? you are my lovely husband" he quickly kisses you, finally feeling some relieve "its just that you didnt said i love you back this morning" you put your arms around his neck and bring his forehead to yours "i could never stop loving you keiji, never in a million years, dont trust anything i say when im sleepy tho"

❦ TENDOU bought some handmade chocolates home, those you loved so much and couldn't stop eatin, you had to ask him frequently to hide them for you "ugh satori i fucking love this chocolates you always make them so good" he sees you with red hearts on his eyes how you were eating the foo he made for you "and i love you" that caugth you out of guarrd, you gave him just a litlle nod because now you were shy, how can he be so smooth?. that didnt go as planned for him, why didnt you replied? were you already tired of him? he knew it was only that stupid litlle voice in his head but just the thougth of you not loving him was heartbreaking. he waited until you finished eating before asking "umh, i know this is me overthinking but do you love me?" your eyes big and round, brows on top of your forehead, with amused expression you replied "of course i love you, actually im sure youre the love of my life, why are you asking?" god wasn't he feeling embarrassed but relieved at the same time "nothing, is just that you didnt told me 'i love you back' and i started to overthink" you made your way towars him and placed yourself ln his lap "i love you satori, with all i have, i will tell you that every minute i have left in my life is necesarry" now both his hans on your waist his nose boopping yours, he whispers "im glad, i love you too, so much, cant wait to see what the future has planned for us"

❦SUGAWARA and you always pulled pranks on each other, it was a silent pact you two had since the beginning of your relationship, you saw this prank in social media and thougth it would be great to put it on him. suga was now grading some of his students works while you were getting ready to work "bye koushi, il see you in a few hours, please take care" he gets up and pecks you goodbye "good luck, i love you" trying very hard not to laught you answer him " i know! goodbye now" he was left there, alone, in the house, and most important of all, without a 'i love you' from his favorite person in the world. he thougth that maybe you were mad at him for something so after he graded a few more works he did all the jobs around the house and lit some of your favorites candles around. the moment you opened the door he was all over you "im sorry if i upseted you, please im sorry i dint mean it, i swear i will start foulding my clothes" now, this is epic "but koushi, im not mad at you" he is dumbfounded "what? but you didnt say 'i love you? today before work" it was your time to laugh and pull him close to you with a hug "you mister sugawara, my smart husband, fell directly into my trap but i want to remind you now that the prank is over that i love you with all my heart" he placed his hands on your hips and rolled his eyes "i swear, im gonna get back at you"

[bread-writes]

I would like to request a Lookism one please

ok so:

The reader is like a single mom and after a couple dates eith either the lookism boys or girls she decides that she want's them to meet her baby (who's like idk 1 ig you can change it I dint mind) how eould some of them react to their s/o having a kid?

you can do what ever characters! (but can one of them be Vasco? You can have whoever else!)

OooO that sounds interesting!

I’ll be combining it with this request since it’s pretty similar.

Writing under the cut!

CW: Children, Single parenting, Mentions of abuse and kidnapping (mild)

Vasco, Samuel, Jake, and Sinu Finding out The Person They're Seeing is a Single Parent

Euntae Lee

he probably would’ve never found out you were a single parent until you told him

he just assumed that you were busy with your life

never questions when you had to leave a date early after getting a notification on your phone

after a few dates or so when you’re finally comfortable enough, you take him to see your child

inviting him to your home was easy enough, you suppose

he’s a little confused on why you’re insisting on meeting up at your home, but is actually very excited to see what your home life is like

is taken aback by the sheer amount of toys littering the ground

you apologize, clearly embarrassed by the mess

the babysitter turns to greet you, surprised and a little terrified by the man at your side

however when they see your interlaced hands, they understand almost immediately, excusing themselves after handing your child back to you

if Vasco was shocked before, he’s definitely very very confused now

upon seeing him, your child would freeze before whimpering and sobbing

dropping his hand, you coo at your child, gently brushing away their tears whilst gently bouncing them in your arms

“...Is that your little sibling?”

you softly shake your head, refusing to meet his questioning gaze

the gears start to turn in his head; from your early exits to the toys on the floor

this was your child

he’ll stare at you for a moment, his eyes shining brightly with an emotion you couldn’t quite name

he’s mesmerized by how quickly you were able to calm the child--your child and is captivated by pure amount of love your gaze holds

after your child calms down, they’ll stare at Vasco for a moment, protectively clinging to the fabric of your sweater

their gazes sends cold shivers down Vasco’s spine

would they hate him?

do they find him scary--

he’s broken from his thought as a small babble makes its way to his ears

your child reaches out to him, their grabby fingers grasping onto his clothes

he stills for a moment until you let out a soft laugh

he watches as you allow your child to latch on to him, the soft smile on your features sending butterflies throughout his stomach

yeah, he could get used to this

Samuel Seo

definitely one of the more suspicious ones when it comes to your secret 

he won’t question it as much if you tell him you’re okay or to stop being so nosey

but, to be fair, when have words ever stopped him?

he won’t do much, just a little digging

which lead him to the fact that you live with someone else

a someone that you’ve never told him about

however, that’s not the part that surprised him

what surprised him was that the other tenant was a minor; listed as your dependent

how he found this out, you’ll never know

he’ll confront you about this

you weren’t happy to see him snooping around in your life, but you eventually sigh before taking him to your house

the babysitter was surprised to see you back so early, but handed you your child nonetheless

Samuel’s eyes would flicker between you and the child, noting the striking resemblances between you and the child

unsure of his feelings, he would excuse himself before making his leave

to be honest, he’s terrified

he’s never been the best when it came to familial relationships

from a young age, Samuel was exposed to violence which blossomed into a few dangerous habits

ex: nearly losing it whenever he’s interrupted

he doesn’t want to project said habits onto your child and potentially lose you; the only one who’s been able to put up with him

when he comes by the next day, you raise a brow as you open the door but usher him in anyway

your child just stares at him and he stares back

it’s just really awkward until you step back in

you move to pick your child up only to be stopped by your lover

he bends down and picks them up underneath their arms, lifting them up lion king style before continuing to stare at them

“This is fine... I suppose.”

Jake Kim

like Vasco, Jake is an idiot who probably never found out you were a single parent unless you told him

there’s also the fact that he’s also extremely busy and wouldn’t question your random disappearances

the way he found out you had a child was actually an accident, really

you were just taking your child for a small stroll in the park when Jake spotted you

he was concerned as to why you were hunched over and what currently had your attention

as he approached, the light coos of your child began to fill the air, mingling with your laughter

a hand on your shoulder caused you to flinch, quickly turning to face the person

your eyes widen as your eyes land on none other than Jake, subconsciously trying to shield your child from your lover

when he sees the child the first thing that goes through is mind is whether or not you kidnapped this child

no, like, seriously

“...Did you kidnap a child?”

“Wha-- No! Why would I kidnap my own child?!”

it takes a moment for your words to sink in 

but when they do, Jake’s eyes are wide with disbelief and you’re covering your mouth 

your child only stares, unable to read the tense mood between their parent and the giant man

when Jake shakes himself out of his daze, he sighs

at first you think he’s mad at you

that is until his arms wrap around your waist and he nuzzles his face into your shoulder

you can feel his lips pull into a smile as he continues to hug you

“You didn’t have to hide this from me. I would still love you regardless if you had a child or not.”

Sinu Han

he strikes me as the kind of guy who would already know but would want you to be comfortable enough to share it with him

when you do, he’s over the moon

...even if it was just a slip of the tongue

he’s so charismatic that you won’t realize what you said until you see the gleaming smile breaking his face

“I’m glad you’re finally trusting me.”

you blink up at him, “You knew?”

he ruffles your hair his unwavering smile sending butterflies fluttering in your stomach

“Of course I knew!”

when you offer for him to meet your child he’s so happy he almost immediately dragging you to buy gifts your child

even if you tell him that it’s fine and that Big Deal’s already tight on funds he’ll insist that he buy a gift because this is your child, after all

yeah, Samuel’s definitely pissed with his sudden splurging, but says nothing to his boss

definitely doesn’t stop him from glaring at the pile of toys and onesies  Sinu bought for your child

Jake on the, other hand, is just concerned

he knows his boss could be weird at times...but was it really necessary to buy three versions of a single cat toy?

upon actually meeting your child, they just instantly click

almost as if they were his child all along

not going to lie, you were pretty jealous

but as long as the to people you cared most about in your life were happy, who were you to be sad?

i- uhhhhhhh I’m back??? Definitely not my best work... especially Samuel’s part, so if you aren’t satisfied with these feel free to shoot an ask! Again, so sorry for disappearing off the face of the Earth like that... 

Edit: LMAO NOT ME FORGETTING TO ADD TAGS FJDIHFJOIDKJFNODKL