#i just keep underestimating how long it takes to tell the story i want to tell

[falseroar]

Over 9k words into this murder mystery fic and the body has yet to hit the floor.

This, uh, might not be the short thing I once thought it was going to be.

[pinkslaystation]

Tulips or Roses?

John Price x reader

In which you find John's old diary detailing his love for you his teammate and you begin to question his love for you. Word Count: 3.6k -> blurb - rose meets tulips

Being a civilian to a soldier was hard enough.

And it was even harder when your husband was a commander for one of the most skillful task force. So it wasn't unusual for him to be gone for long periods of time.

So on a random Friday evening, anticipating his arrival in the coming week, vacuuming the floors, cleaning the windows, you found yourself at the door of John's study, with was decorated with a glass name plate, with the words 'Study' accompanied with a painted heart created from blue and pink fingerprints from you and your husband.

John was never the man to tell you off if you entered his study, instead he encouraged it. He's beckoned you to bring him his evening tea to him, to give him a massage, sometimes when you wanted him, he'd allow you to help him under the desk, if you get what I mean. (speaking from experience ;>)

As you stepped into his room, you noticed the ceilings adorned with sizable white cobwebs, cringing at the apparent neglect of his study. When was the last time someone had even been here?

Sweeping his desk, wiping away the dust, you find a box underneath beside his chair, which prompted you to lifting it up and placing on top of the desk. Man, you underestimated it's weight. You struggled to lift a small but heavy moving box, and it caused a few books and papers to fall out.

You cursed at your clumsiness, picking up the loose sheets, until you fingers caught the spine of a red vintage-like book, which had the word 'diary' written on the front. You didn't take too much notice, skimming through the pages until you caught your name being mentioned a phew times.

You giggle, it's a diary probably with John confessing his love to you numerous time! You know you probably shouldn't look through it, I mean privacy exists, but you just can't help it.

So you look through some of the infrequent entries, the oldest dating back to 10 years back, and the most recent one being nearly 4 years, when you and John had first met.

30th February 2010

Suffering in Afghanistan, the lads and I are stuck in the safe house for a week now. Rose is here too, I should ask her if she's okay.

Ahhh you remember this story. When the Task Force was stuck in the city of Kandahar, in the safe house. You also remember John's team, whom you are well-acquainted with, Soap, Ghost, Gaz, Roach, Rose?

You skip through the boring entries, most of which are just John documenting his work-out plan and the places him and his team had visited.

5th July 2016

Gaz's going on and on about his lass. Someone tell him to talk to her at least, he doesn't even know her name! I keep bringing it up but he keeps mentioning when I'll talk to Rose.

You chuckled, assuming the chick was Gaz's current wife. But the last part caught your attention, Rose again? You remember John telling you that she'd retired, went back north to settle with her family now, so you don't think much of it, I mean they are team mates.

19th June 2017

Saw a cute kid and her mama, wishing I had kids, without this lifestyle. Rose wants a son but I don't particularly mind. Soap overheard our conversation and spammed me lols on Whatsapp, but I thought lol meant little old lady? I am a man though.

You raise your eyebrow at another mention of Rose, why doesn't he care if Rose wanted a son? You didn't realise how close your husband was to her.

2nd December 2018

Christmas this month with my boys. Rose invited me over for a smoke. Ghost rolls his eyes when I mentioned it to him, says I need to man up and make a move.

You squinted your eyes, rereading the entry, and hesitantly skipping to the next one.

7th April 2019

Drinks with my men (and Rose haha, she doesn't like being part of the men). It's her birthday and she wants to tell us something. She's got her red lips again. I'm excited, Soap kept nudging me the entire ride, that cheeky bugger.

Then immediately below it, an update: She's seeing someone.

You're slowly piecing the puzzle, though you don't want to assume anything.

21st August 2019

She came into my room crying, seems like it's not going well, good for me. I hope she's okay and she realises there's better fish in the sea. She hugged me, she smells like roses, I love floral scents. I tried leaning in, she says I'm like an older brother to her.

Your heart breaks a bit, sniffing at your freshly washed hair, which smelt like ... like roses.

You thought floral scents were YOUR thing.

You continued, to the next entry which was marked the date you remember meeting John for the first time at the pub. You force a smile, hoping the entry would lighten your mood.

30th November 2020

In the pub and bored. Rose brought her lad... they're back together. What does she see in him? Soap urges me to find someone else but my heart is set on someone, for a long time. Won't change. He keeps gesturing to a girl on the other end of the counter, she's pretty, but like a tulip. Not like a rose. Not like my Rose.

You grip at the notebook and you try your hardest not to rip the papers out of the book and set his entire study on fire.

You remember this day, when you were dragged to the pub by your friends after being dumped by your ex for another girl. You sat at one end of the counter, with tears in your eyes but one look at that buff Englishman on the other end and your mood flipped instantaneously, 180 degrees.

"Kelsey, look at that guy, Mr Army over there." You beckon towards John's direction, to your friend., slightly tipsy after a peg of beer.

Your friend looks at you with a raised eyebrow, then turns to the guy whose piqued your interest, "You should go for it." She encourages you.

So you get yourself 2 drinks and approach the guy, more confident that usual due to your alcoholic state. A beer would do.

"Hi, this seat empty?" You smile at him innocently.

All this time you had recalled a look of fondness towards you, when he'd first locked eyes with you. You remember bragging about how it had been love at first sight for the both of you, but thinking back, a feeling of doubt starts bubbling inside you.

"It's reserve- you know what. Take a seat."

You remember sitting next to him, passing him a drink, and telling him your name, "...and you are?" you question, although you see him wincing. At first you thought it was just an army thing, so guarded that even the slightest of movements would make him twitch.

But now you're questioning whether he really wanted to engage into a conversation with you.

The following hours, as you painfully recall, was filled with you talking about yourself and occasionally asking him after his life, though he gives you one word answers and frequent nods.

But that was just because he'd just come home from a mission right?

"...and he just broke up with me out of the blue! Like was my 12,000 followers on TikTok not good enough for you?" You chuckle, attempting to crack a joke. He smiles confused, and you note he's probably too old to understand what TikTok was.

"Sounds like an asshole, love." He replies.

"Hmm, he was...I- I just don't know what he'd leave me for her...like I gave you my everything, I was always with you through thick and thin and what, that wasn't enough for you?" You trail off, the effects of the 2nd beer hitting you.

"I understand dove, you just give 'em everything and they just find someone else. What does he have that I don't?" He spaces out, his eyes falling on his teammates sitting at a different table. You follow his gaze, smiling slightly when you lock eyes with one of his smirking subordinates, whom you know know as Soap.

"Those people, they're your team?" You question.

His eyes aren't on you though as he responds, "That mohawk, that's Soap, Ghost next to him, tough as steel but soft at heart, Gaz on the opposite, funny lad, Roach, good ol' Roach..."

You look at the woman to the right of 'Roach', taking in her beauty. Though she's sitting down, you can tell she's taller that you by least 4 inches, with a blonde pixie haircut and painted with a dark smokey eye. A deep smirk is plastered onto her plump ruby red lips as she looks at John Price finally talking to a woman that isn't her. She raises a hand, waving to the both of you, which is almost instantaneously reciprocated by John.

"And her?" You ask, head nudging towards the woman.

"Her...That's Rose. You should meet her, you would like her, but who doesn't..." His chuckle fades out and you at how his attention was fully directed to her. A sinking feeling told you that you should have backed off from the married man, but it disappeared when John pointed out her partner, with gritted teeth.

Your hands are gripping the pages at this point, as you recall memories from the diary from his point of view.

You turn the page to the next entry, dreading the words.

19th December 2020

Thought me and Rose would go back to the pub for another drink for the holidays, but she's going back to his place. Seems they're taking the next steps with meeting the families.

Soap's annoyed at how I'm 'ghosting' the girl I met at the pub, I'm once again unfamiliar with the lingo, I'm not Simon?? She's nice but, not sure I see anything further than a friendship. Gaz and him are picking out an outfit for me, she wants to meet up for bowling apparently. I just want to be with Rose...

Clenching your fist, you shut the diary and toss it aside, feeling all kinds of emotions. Upset that John had never truly looked at you the way you'd looked at him. The way he never wanted you, like you wanted him.

Every time you'd seen him online on Whatsapp, but still hadn't opened your messages, he was ghosting you? Sure after a while of being friends, his behaviour gradually changed, accompanied with rapid texts, but you felt like this relationship was built on lies.

Did he even want to go bowling with you that day? Did you win because he purposely let you, because he was bored and wanted to go home, be with Rose instead? When he asked you to be his girlfriend, did he ask you with Rose in mind?

The ding of the oven stopped your trail of thoughts, so many questions swirling around your head. You walk out of the study, slamming the door behind you, the combined mess of dust and cobwebs remaining untouched.

The glass name plate falls to the ground, the edge shattering, with shards of clear glass laying dangerously on the wooden floor.

A couple of hours go by and the doorknob rattles at 8:45 P.M. on the dot. John was never late when he had to come home to you.

He reaches base at 7:30, drives exacting an hour to your shared home, after making a quick pit stop at the florists within 10 minutes to give you a freshly scented bouquet of red roses.

Roses. So that's why he'd give them you every time...

He makes sure to leave him 5 minutes of spare time, which was designated to flipping open a small metal notebook you'd gifted him, and writing his thoughts down. And once those 5 minutes were up, he places the notepad back into his jacket pocket and practically runs towards the front door.

"Dove, I'm home!" He exclaimed, gently placing his belonging on the floor, before walking into the living floor, where you sat on the sofa with your legs and arms crossed. (MY BITCH POSE IS NASTY)

"Sweetheart, you didn't run up to me at the door, you alright love?" He sits next to you, his calloused and freshly bruised arms rubbing your knee.

The silence was deafening and you couldn't find it in yourself to look at him after all you've read.

He takes it as a cue to continue, "I got you some roses, baby. Your favourite-"

"When did I say they were my favourite?"

John blinks at the interruption, "I mean, you don't like them? It's tradition to bring the same red roses for you every time I'm back..."

"And when did I say I liked them? Are they my favourite? Or are they her favourite?" You shift towards him, anger evident in your voice.

"Her? Who? Sweetheart, what's going on?"

"I mean, come on man, you like floral shit that much that now you're making me wear it?"

"You...don't like floral scents? Did you want tulips instead, baby?"

Your eyebrows are furrowed in annoyance by his confusion.

"It doesn't matter if I wanted tulips, John, it's the fact that YOU like roses. In fact you've like Roses this entire time! Don't act like you like tulips 'cos you don't- to be honest I don't think you ever have!" You rant, handing running through your hair.

"I mean I like both honey, roses are just, um, prettier?" He sounds like he's asking you rather than telling you.

"Of course roses are prettier to you- that's all that you're fucking used to you. It's always roses, roses, roses. You're so obsessed with fucking roses, you never gave tulips a bloody chance!"

"Are we still talking about flowers-"

"And when you do give tulips a chance, you're still thinking about roses- how red they are, how pretty they are, how they need to be watered every 5 fucking minutes, even then there's already someone to water those damn. Red. Roses."

"I- I mean I like tulips too, baby-"

"No. You don't. No, you don't. Tulips are just the safest options for you, cos someone already plucked out those fucking roses. Cos roses don't want you."

You're standing up now, and John's attempts to speak are futile with every sentence you shout.

"No. In fact, roses has never wanted you, roses look better with someone else, and ol' poor John has no more roses, so he goes and waters some unwanted tulips instead!"

John stands up, towering over your shaking frame, his hands come up to stroke your biceps, but he's pushed away.

"I mean, did John ever even like tulips? Or was he faking it cos he never got roses? Was tulips just the safe option? Does John still want roses after all the years tulips have been there for him?"

You left out a pained cry, you didn't even notice the tears leaking out of your eyes.

"Does John even like tulips? Does John even love tulips?"

His hands wipe your tears away, and he brings you into his chest, and you don't attempt to push him away this time.

"Does you even love me, John?" You break down into his arms, letting him carrying you into the bedroom, where he places you gently on the bed, while you hiccup through your uneven sobs. He smells the stench of wine through your shaking breath, whilst stroking your hair, and you slowly fall into a deep slumber with your head pressed against his still uniform-clad chest.

The clock hits midnight and John gets up, trying not to wake you up, grabbing his sweats from the drawer and walking to the bathroom across the hall, in order to not wake you up, from what looked like a well-needed rest.

As he trudges out of the bedroom and through the corridor, the reflection of the broken glass catches his eyes and he squints in the darkness, squatting down to pick a small shard. As he lifts the remains of the nameplate, hooking it back to the door, he steps over the mess into the study to retrieve a dust pan and brush.

Flicking the lights on, he's met with what looks like a scene from the reality TV show - Hoarders. So starts cleaning quickly, picking up the duster and bunching up the paperwork from the floor, the pot of pens that had seemed to be knocked down, the diary he'd used to write in...hold on-

Picking up the diary, John flicks through the entries, the book naturally opening to the last open slide.

He begins reading the last entry.

19th December 2020

Thought me and Rose would go back to the pub for another drink for the holidays, but she's going back to his place. Seems they're taking the next steps with meeting the families.

Soap's annoyed at how I'm 'ghosting' the girl I met at the pub....

"Oh...my tulip, I've never loved roses as much as I loved you." He mumbles to himself, whilst simultaneously cringing at his previously written words, immediately throwing the book back on the floor.

It's past breakfast when you wake up, throat and eyes painfully dry from last night's crying session, forcing yourself to drag yourself to the bathroom. You've forgotten that John had come home last night, as your met with a familiar empty bed.

After brushing your teeth and washing your face, you walk downstairs, being face to face with the naked back of Captain John Price.

The smell of chocolate pancakes waft towards your nose, as you look around the kitchen, the room garnished with a variety of different flowered bouquets, with so many variations of plants.

Bundles of dahlias and lotuses, orchids and lilies, carnations and irises, roses and tulips.

John turns to your footsteps, smiling at his perfect woman.

"Baby, good mornin'" He greets you, placing a single rose into your hair, and pecking your forehead warmly.

"John, listen about last night-"

"It was the old diary, wasn't it?" he asks.

You nod, ashamed for your abrupt behaviour yesterday. John lifts your chin up, resting his forehead against yours.

"Rose never taught me how to love like you did."

"John, you don-" His pointer finger is pressed against your lips.

"Reading those words from the past, I can see how it may have painted a different picture of my feelings. But let me assure you, my love, that you are the one I adore with all my heart."

Your stroke his face, heart warming to his words.

"Every rose I brought home was a symbol of my love for you, not because it was her favorite, but because it reminded me of the beauty and grace that you bring into my life. And those tulips, they represent the new beginnings and the fresh start that we share together.

My love for you is unwavering and unconditional. You are my tulip, my true love, and I vow to cherish and adore you for all eternity. Please forgive me for any pain or doubt my past words may have caused."

"John..."

He hands you his notepad from from his back pocket, beckoning you to open it.

You look at the first entry.

19th February 2021

I mentioned how I journal sometimes to her, and she bought me a new notepad, it's cute how she calls it a diary. Things are looking good. Bowling's our thing, I let her win because seeing her smile means I've won too. I'm asking her out tonight, Soap cried real tears when I told him.

You turn the page.

20th July 2021

Our 6 month anniversary. Took her to a field of roses and tulips, though nothing compares to her beauty.

The next one.

17th September 2021

I seldom think of Rose, I have my tulip on my mind now. Rose retired, and the team celebrated last night. She hugged me and thanked me for being a good captain. She also acknowledged my previous feelings for her. Man that was uncomfortable, but I reassured her I'm with my tulip now. I love my tulip.

I've always preferred tulips anyway.

And the next.

5th July 2022

Our 500 day anniversary. I want to propose.

17th September 2022

She said yes!! She may be my fiance, but I've already started calling her my wife, not legally yet at least...illegally?

28rd December 2023

We married 30th November. The day we met. Xmas was amazing, I can't see myself with anyone but her. I'm getting deployed tomorrow though.

You look at the most recent entry, dated last night.

16th February 2024

Missed the valentines day with my missus. Hope these roses are enough, though I wanted to get something better. Tulips for my tulip. They ran out haha. Missed my girl, missed her like I've never missed someone before. Soap's right, deployment suck.

Tears welled up in your eyes, not from pain or doubt this time, but from overwhelming joy and love for the man standing before you.

"I'm sorry, John," you whispered, your voice choked with emotion. "I didn't mean to doubt your love."

He smiled, a genuine and heartfelt smile that reached his eyes, pulling you into a warm embrace. "No need for apologies, my tulip. Thank you for teaching me how to love."

And in that moment, amidst the scent of chocolate pancakes and fresh flowers, it felt like you love story was just beginning, filled with trust, forgiveness, and a deep, unwavering love for each other.

That should not have taken me 2 days to complete what in the world. Also if i was tulip, that old diary is going straight into a fire! Barbecue anyone? <3 Quick Notes: I head-cannoned Rose to look like Sergeant Calhoun from Fix-it-Felix lolololol woman crush fr i get u john boy I've decided to start a tag list! -> lemme know you're interested to be tagged in my future posts! tags -> @lilliumrorum

[azziesbattybaddie]

You are my survival

Azriel x reader

You and Azriel are mates. Az knows it, you don't, that is until a particularly hard training session when the truth finally come out.

Word count: 5k

Requested: no

Warnings: fem reader, shadow play, smut, swearing, choking kink, praise, Azriel's wingspan, oral F and M receiving, Az is a Dom, PinV, we die like men

🔥 means smut will follow

Authors note: this is the first WIP I've finished in like 2 or 3 years so be gentle on me I also wrote this with one of my friends on discord and she is absolutely amazing, constructive criticism is welcome and plz let me know if I missed any tags. Enjoy!

"Pay attention."

His words weren't harsh by any means. No, Azriel would never raise his voice at you, but he'd be lying if he said training you was easy. He watched as you breathed heavily, body glistening with sweat. You'd been at this for hours. Clearly, you'd underestimated just how difficult swordplay was.

"I'm trying my best"

He let out a small chuckle, watching your brows furrow with frustration as he managed to point his sword at your neck, Again.

"Gotcha."

"dammit!"

You threw your sword down in frustration and slinked over to the corner of the ring. Before hugging your knees to your chest and sulking.

"I'm done, I'm quit!"

Sheathing his sword, Azriel approached you slowly, his footsteps silent on the straw-covered floor. He stopped a few feet away, giving you space but close enough to offer comfort.

"Hey, hey now," he murmured softly.

"Don't give up just yet."

He hesitated for a moment before sitting down beside you, keeping a respectful distance.

"Training is hard, y/n. It's supposed to push you, make you stronger. It's okay to feel frustrated, but don't let it consume you."

He glanced at you, his eyes reflecting genuine concern.

"You're doing better than you think. You've improved so much since we started. It's just... progress takes time. And patience." He offered you a small, encouraging smile.

"And maybe some water? You've been at it all day."

"yeah well maybe I should train with someone else because your a thousand times better than me and you have 400 years of experience on me so even if I am getting better your skill just dwarfs mine..."

Azriel looked at you, a soft smile playing on his lips. He had expected such a reaction from you, and he couldn't say that he blamed you either.

"You underestimate yourself," he told you gently, placing a hand on your shoulder.

"It may take time, but you will get there. Just keep practicing and if you can't believe in yourself, believe in the fact that I'm starting to feel your progress in your punches." As always tried to joke with you slightly but seeing as he got nothing but a half earned smile he let himself fall quiet.

He sighed deeply, his gaze drifting down to his scarred hands fiddling with them idly. There were things he wanted to tell you, things he wanted to share about his past, but he knew you weren't ready for them yet. Maybe one day, when you were strong enough, he could tell you everything.

Following his gaze, you watched as he picked at his nails and cuticles. You had known Az for a few hundred years now and as long as you had known him he had never shared the story of his warped skin and you had never worked up the courage to ask, that was until now.

"can I ask you a question without you getting upset? You can tell me to screw off if you don't want to answer, I won't push." You said in a timid, whispered voice. Azriel turned to look at you, his expression curious.

"Of course, y/n. What is it?"

He kept his tone calm and non-threatening, not wanting to scare you off. Whatever it was, he would do his best to answer honestly.

"what happened to your hands?"

Azriel's expression softened, and he looked down at his hands, his fingers curling slightly as he remembered.

"My hands... They were burned by-" he let out a heavy sigh, flexing his hands under your gaze before continuing.

"they were burned by my brothers, many years ago. I was born a bastard like Cassian so I was treated differently, even by my so-called family. They it left me with these scars."

He lifted his hands, showing you the intricate network of burn scars that covered his palms and fingers. They were a constant reminder of his past, a painful chapter he would rather forget.

"what brings that question to mind?"

you reach to grab his hand but hesitated before touching him.

"I just always wondered if they were painful they still look painful..."He noticed your hesitation and gave you a reassuring nod, encouraging you to continue.

"It doesn't hurt anymore, physically at least. But sometimes, the memories can still be quite painful." He lowered his hands, his gaze returning to yours staying quiet for a beat.

"It's alright, y/n. You won't hurt me by touching them. I won't bite or as Cass would say 'i won't bite unless you want me too'" he says with a half honest grin trying to lift the mood slightly.

He held out his hand, palm facing up, waiting for you to make the first move. He wanted to show you that he trusted you, that he was comfortable with you touching him. "Go ahead, y/n."

you gingerly brushed your fingers over his scarred hand before taking one of his hands in both of your running your thumbs over the back before smile and saying softly

"They always looked soft still..."

A faint smile tugged at the corners of his mouth as he felt his face heat slightly at the praise. He never wanted to feel anything other than your gentle touch on his scarred hand.

"Because of the burns, my skin never calloused so yeah I guess they are."

He turned his hand over, intertwining his fingers with yours. The warmth of your touch seeped into his skin, soothing the old wounds in ways he hadn't experienced in centuries.

"I never associated touch with comfort before. It feels like home." ' you feel like home' is what he would have said if he had the nerve but kept that thought to himself, thinking it to cheesey to say out loud.

His thumb stroked the back of your hand, a tender gesture that spoke volumes about the unspoken bond between you two. In that moment, the weight of his secrets and the darkness of his past seemed to fade away, replaced by a simple, pure connection with you.

you lifted your head to look at him only to find him already looking at you, your faces close enough to feel each others baited breaths.

Azriel's gaze locked onto yours, his heart pounding against his ribcage like a wild drum. The intensity of your stare was almost overwhelming, stirring feelings within him that he thought long buried.

He leaned closer, his lips inches away from yours. He could smell your scent, a mix of sweat and something uniquely you. It was intoxicating, making his pulse race and his resolve weaken.

For a moment, he considered closing the gap, pressing his lips against yours and losing himself in the warmth of your embrace. But he pulled back, breaking eye contact, reminding himself of the danger in such actions.

without thinking of the consequences of your actions you shot your hand out to cradle the side of his face turning him back to look at you and meet him with pleading look, begging him not to turn away.

Azriel's breath caught in his throat as he felt your hand cup his cheek, turning his face back towards you. He met your pleading gaze, his own eyes filled with a mix of longing and fear.

He wanted nothing more than to surrender to the desire burning within him, to lose himself in your embrace and forget about his past, his fears, and his responsibilities. But he knew he couldn't. Not yet, at least.

With a heavy sigh, he gently removed your hand from his face, his fingertips trailing along your skin as he did so.

"y/n, we can't," he whispered, his voice barely audible.

"I care for you too much to risk putting you in danger. We need to focus on our training, on becoming stronger, you need to be ready for when hyburn attacks."

your pout deepened as you moved back slowly pulling your hand away from his reluctantly as you bit your lip trying to think of something to say to make him change his mind.

"Az we can still train and I've been getting stronger for years, why can't we just," you trail off, not knowing that words for the feeling you felt for him.

Azriel's chest tightened at your pout, a pang of guilt slicing through him as he cut you off. He hated seeing you upset, especially over something he had done.

"It's not because I don't want to," he assured you, reaching out to brush a strand of hair behind your ear.

"It's because I care about you too much. If I give in to these feelings now, it might lead to something neither of us is prepared for, not with so much at stake with war coming."

He paused, his gaze dropping to your lips before lifting back to meet your eyes.

"We're mates. I've known for a while but even though we were designed for each other. And right now with hyburn threatening to breach our borders, our lives and decisions can't be about love or passion-it's about survival"

you pull his face back to you for a last time before running the pads of your thumbs over his cheeks lovingly

"I know that az, but you are my survival. you said it yourself that your my mate, do you really think that I can live without my mate, without you?" You plead tears starting to form in your eyes.

The words hit him like a physical blow, leaving him momentarily speechless. Your admission cut straight to the core of his being, striking a chord within him that resonated with a depth of longing he didn't fully understand.

"You need my love..." he echoed, the words sounding foreign even to his ears. He'd never been loved, let alone needed. The idea was both terrifying and exhilarating.

"I... I don't know if I can give you that. I've never been loved, and I've never loved anyone the way I think I should. you deserve all the love there is in this world, and I don't think I can give you that."

His voice cracked with emotion, betraying the turmoil of feelings welling up inside him.

"you can,"

You step closer still holding his face you pull a hand away to grab his scarred one and place it on your waist and putting your hand on his chest over his heart gingerly.

"You have so much love in your heart that you can't help but let it spill over. You try to act so cold and calloused to everyone but we all feel you how much you love us. "

At your touch, Azriel felt a surge of emotion course through him, his heart pounding wildly against your palm. He stared down at you, his eyes searching yours for any sign of deception or manipulation, but found only sincerity and vulnerability.

"You really believe that, don't you?" he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.

"That I have love to give?"

He hesitated for a moment, then placed his other hand tentatively on your waist. The warmth of your body seeped into his chilled skin, melting some of the ice that had encased his heart for so long.

"I want to believe it," he admitted, his gaze dropping to your lips once more.

"But I'm afraid of putting you in a dangerous situation that you never need to be in. Afraid of losing control and doing something that could harm you. We both know that my work is extremely dangerous and if you got pulled into that I would never fucking forgive myself"

"Azriel... Your the bravest male I've ever met, please don't stop being brave." You take a final step faces inches apart

Azriel's breath hitched as you closed the remaining distance between you, your bodies nearly touching. He could feel the heat radiating off you, drawing him in like a moth to flame.

"Brave doesn't mean fearless, y/n," he said, his voice low and husky.

"Sometimes bravery means facing your deepest fears, even when every instinct tells you to run." You whisper gingerly brushing you fingers over his leathers laying over his heart.

He reached up, his fingers curling around the nape of your neck as he tilted your head back slightly. His thumb brushed against your lower lip, sending shivers down your spine.

"I'm just scared of failing you, of not being able to protect you. But I'm also scared of missing this chance, of letting my fears hold me back from trying to give us the life the cauldron has laid out for us."

"Then don't let your fears hold you back Az, let me hold them instead." You hold his hand over your cheek and guide his thumb over your lip again gently.

Azriel's resistance crumbled under your gentle guidance, his thumb gliding over your soft, plump lips with a tenderness that surprised even him. He leaned in closer, his nose brushing against yours as he savored the scent of your skin, the warmth of your breath.

"cauldron..." he murmured, his voice thick with longing.

he closed the final inch of distance, pressing his lips to yours in a kiss that was both tentative and desperate, holding your sides as delicately as fine china.

🔥🔥🔥

you surge you hand up to tangle in his hair and let out an audible cry of relief into his mouth.

Azriel groaned softly into the kiss as your hand tangled in his hair, the sensation sending sparks of pleasure through him. He wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you flush against his body as he deepened the kiss, his tongue sweeping across your lips to explore the warm cavern of your mouth.

As he kissed you, Azriel felt a weight lift from his shoulders, a burden he hadn't realized he carried until it was gone. In your embrace, he found a sense of peace, of belonging, that he had never known before.

Breaking the kiss, he rested his forehead against yours, panting lightly as he struggled to catch his breath. "Y/n, I've wanted this for so long," he confessed, his voice rough with emotion.

"Wanted to hold you, touch you, taste you now."

"then don't fucking stop now." You practically begged, chasing his lips.

Your impassioned plea sent a jolt of desire through Azriel, his grip on you tightening as he ground his hips against yours, the hard length of his arousal pressing insistently against your belly.

"Oh, god, baby," he gasped, his breath hot against your skin.

"I won't stop, not now, not ever again." His hands trailing down to your ass, gently kneading the flesh under your fighting leathers.

"You're mine, and I'm going to fuck you so hard, make you scream my name until you forget everyone else exists."With that declaration, Azriel swept you up into his arms and winnowed you back to the house of wind before.

carrying you towards his bedroom as he devoured your mouth in a frenzy of kisses, his hands roaming your curves with a hunger that bordered on desperation. your legs wrap around his waist as he carries you and you press your breasts against his chest, mewl desperately against his lips.

The sound of your moans vibrating against his lips was music to Azriel's ears, fueling his already raging desire. He kicked open the door to his bedroom, his eyes burning with a fierce intensity as he laid you down onto the plush mattress.

"Gods, babygirl," he growled, his hands tracing the outline of your curves as he knelt beside you, his eyes devouring every inch of your exposed flesh. "You're so beautiful, so perfect..."

Without another word, he began to undress you, peeling away each layer of your leathers with a reverence that belied his usual cool demeanor. As he revealed your skin to his hungry gaze, he marveled at the sight, at the swell of your breasts, the curve of your hips, the sweet dip of your navel.

"And you smell divine,"

Azriel couldn't help but lean down, his tongue darting out to trace a path along the delicate line of your collarbone, savoring the taste of your skin. He licked and nibbled his way down your body, pausing to lavish attention on each breast, his tongue swirling around your nipples before taking them into his mouth, sucking gently.

His hands weren't idle either, slipping down to cup your ass, squeezing the firm flesh as he continued his descent. His shadows hooked around the sides of your panties, dragging them down your thighs with a teasing slowness that left you squirming beneath him.

"Tell me what you want, baby," he whispered against your skin, his voice a husky murmur.

"What do you crave? Tell me how to make you come undone?"

you reached down to Palm the tent in his fighting leathers at the words and using your other hand to wrap the scared flesh of his hand around your throat.

"I want you to use me, own me Azriel."

At your command, Azriel's heart pounded with a wild rhythm, his cock throbbing in your grasp. He allowed you to control his movements, his hand tightening around your throat in a gesture that was both possessive and protective while one of his larger shadows gently brushed against the side of your face in stark contrast.

"You're mine now, babygirl," he breathed, his voice laced with raw need.

"And I plan to worship every gods-damned inch of you."

With that promise, he slid down further, his lips trailing kisses along your inner thigh, his breath hot against your sensitive flesh. He paused just above where you needed him most, his eyes locking with yours as he teased you mercilessly.

"Do you want more?" he asked, his voice a seductive whisper. "Do you want my mouth on you, tasting you?"

"gods yes please!" You hold his hand tightly around his throat encouraging him to squeeze harder what you arch your back of the bed in hopes of inching your cunt closer to his mouth.

Azriel's grip around your throat tightened slightly at your eager response, his thumb applying just enough pressure to send a thrill of excitement through you. With a low growl, he finally gave in to your pleas, his mouth descending upon your dripping folds.

He lavished your pussy with attention, his tongue delving deep inside you as he fucked you with slow, deliberate strokes while flicks of dark swirl around your clit. He explored every inch of your sex, savoring the taste of your arousal, the feel of your slick walls clenching around his tongue.

As he ate you out, Azriel's free hand roamed your body, palming your breasts, pinching your nipples, leaving trails of fire and cold in its wake. He could feel your climax building, could taste your sweet submission on his tongue, and it only fueled his own desire.

"come on babygirl, ride my face while you come."

He brought one of your hands to tangle in his hair and wrapped his arms around the tops of your thighs encouraging you to buck into his tongue.

Your hips bucked off the bed as you came hard on his tongue, your orgasm crashing over you like a tidal wave, your juices flowing freely as you cried out his name, your fingers tangling in his hair, holding him close.

Azriel drank in your release, his tongue lapping up every drop of your essence as he savored the taste of your pleasure. He held you tight, his mouth never leaving your pussy as you rode out the waves of your orgasm, your cries of ecstasy music to his ears.

Only when you finally went limp did he release you, his face glistening with your arousal. He crawled up your body, his chocolate eyes blazing with a fierce possessiveness as he claimed your mouth in a searing kiss.

"Now it's my turn," he growled against your lips, his hands tearing at his leathers to free his straining cock.

"Get on your knees, baby, I want to fuck that pretty mouth of yours."

You eagerly roll onto your stomach and push yourself off the bed and onto your knees Infront of him batting your lashes and staring up at him with lust filled eyes.

Azriel watched you move, his heart pounding with a mix of desire and admiration. Your eagerness was intoxicating, fueling his own need even further. He discarded his leathers completely, revealing his veined cock, throbbing with need.

Azriel's breath caught in his throat at the sight of you kneeling before him, your eyes filled with hunger and desire. He ran a hand through your disheveled hair, his fingers tangling in your locks as he guided your head towards his aching cock.

"Open wide, love," *he murmured, his voice thick with need.

"Show me how much you need me."

you took him into your mouth, Azriel let out a low groan, his hips bucking involuntarily. Your warm, wet mouth felt like heaven, and he had to fight the urge to thrust too hard, too fast. Instead, he set a steady pace, his hands guiding your head as you sucked the tip every time he pulled out.

"Fuck, good girl," he gasped, his grip tightening in your hair. "You fucking feel incredible..."You moaned softly as you took him deeper into your mouth working your tongue over his cock, your hands reaching up to cup his balls as you continue to suckle on his cock.

The sensation of your tongue working over his length, coupled with the feeling of your hands on his balls, sent jolts of pleasure coursing through Azriel's body. He watched you, entranced by the sight of your lips stretched around his cock, the sound of your soft moans vibrating against him.

"That's right, baby," he purred, his voice heavy with lust.

"Take all of me... Show me how much you want this..."

He began to move faster, his hips rocking into your mouth, setting a rhythm that had him teetering on the brink of release. His fingers threaded through your hair, urging you on, pushing you to take him even deeper.

"fuck yes! Good girl, just like tha- oh such fucking good girl!"

You moan louder now sending subtle vibrations down his shaft, your cheeks hollowing out as you suck harder on his cock, taking him deeper each time until he hits the back of your throat. You gag softly but quickly recover and continue sucking him off as if your life depends on it.

The feeling of your throat constricting around his cock was almost too much for Azriel to bear. He grunted, his hands gripping your hair tighter as he fucked your mouth with abandon, his hips snapping forward with each thrust.

"Oh gods, baby..." he groaned, his voice ragged with need.

"You're going to make me come so fucking hard..."

His cock throbbed in your mouth, signaling his imminent release. With a final, powerful thrust, he spilled his seed into your willing mouth, his cum coating your tongue and spilling down your chin.

"That's it... Swallow it all..."

Swiping your fingers over your chin you collect the molten cream and swallow every last drop of his cum, your throat working to milk him dry, your eyes locked on his as you gaze up at him with a look of complete satisfaction and devotion.

Azriel watched, transfixed, as your throat bobbed swallowing his cum, your tongue working to milk him dry. He let out a satisfied sigh, his fingers gently stroking through your hair as he admired the look of complete satisfaction on your face.

"You're amazing," he murmured, pulling out of your mouth and offering you a hand up.

"I hope you enjoyed that as much as I did."

With a smile, he pulled you into his arms for a deep, passionate kiss, his hands roaming over your body as he savored the taste of you still lingering on his tongue.

You lean into his touch, your body pressed tightly against his as you kiss him back just as passionately, your hands running over his chest, feeling the muscles beneath his skin.

Azriel dominated you mouth with a throaty moan, his hands exploring your curves with a growing urgency. He broke away from the kiss only long enough to trail hot, open-mouthed kisses down your neck, savoring the taste of your skin.

"I want more," he whispered huskily,

"but I think we should save some energy for later."With that, he lifted you effortlessly, carrying you back to the bed where he laid you down, his eyes darkening with desire as he looked down at you.

You giggle lightly as he lays you back down on the bed, your legs parting slightly as you invite him closer.

Azriel's gaze followed the movement of your legs, a smirk playing at the corners of his mouth as he saw the invitation in your eyes. He climbed onto the bed, settling between your thighs, his weight supported on his elbows as he gazed down at you.

"Impatient little thing, aren't you?" he teased, his voice low and playful.

He leaned down, capturing one of your nipples in his mouth, swirling his tongue around the hardened peak before giving it a gentle bite.

"But don't worry, love. I plan to take full advantage of that"

Feeling your hands in his hair, Azriel gave a low chuckle, the vibration of his laughter traveling straight to your breasts. He continued his attentions, alternating between teasing your nipples and tracing patterns across your skin with his tongue.

"Hmm, sounds like someone wants more," he murmured, his voice muffled against your flesh.

Pulling back slightly, he shifted his position, aligning his cock with your slick entrance. Without another word, he pushed inside you, filling you completely with a single, smooth stroke.

You arch your back, pressing your breasts back into his waiting mouth as he teases and bites at your sensitive nipples, a soft moan escaping your lips. Your hands find their way to his hair, tangling in the strands as you pull him closer, desperate for more of his touch.

"Fucking hell, babygirl..." he groaned, his hips beginning to rock slowly as he adjusted to your tight warmth. impatience."

He moved to your other breast, lavishing the same attention upon it, all while grinding his hardening cock against your core. Your back arches off the bed as he fills you, a sharp gasp leaving your lips at the sudden intrusion. But as he begins to move, slow and deliberate, you relax into him, your inner walls clenching around his thickness.

"Ah... yes..." you breathe out, your hands tightening in his hair.

"Just like that... Don't stop..."

Hearing your plea, Azriel picked up the pace, his hips snapping forward with increasing urgency. Each thrust drove him deeper into your welcoming heat, the sound of skin slapping against skin filling the room.

"Gods, you feel incredible," he growled, leaning down to capture your lips in a searing kiss, his tongue dueling with yours as he fucked you relentlessly.

His hands roamed your body, squeezing your ass cheeks, tracing the curve of your waist, and finally, cupping your breasts once again, thumbing your nipples into stiff peaks.

You meet his kiss with equal fervor, your tongue dancing with his as you lose yourself in the sensation of being filled so completely. Your legs wrap around his ass, pulling him even deeper within you, urging him on.

"Oh god, Azriel!" you cry out, your walls spasming around him, milking him for all he's worth.

Feeling your orgasm ripple through you, Azriel let out a guttural roar, burying himself as deep as he could go as he found his own release. He came hard, pulsing streams of hot cum inside you, his body shuddering with the force of it.

"baby Fuck, y/n-" he gasped, collapsing forward, catching himself on his elbows to keep from crushing you before pulling out and gently resting himself on top of you, his hips still between your legs and his head resting on your breasts.

He stayed there for a moment, panting, his heart pounding against your chest, before slowly rolling to the side, taking you with him so you were draped across his chest.

"That was... intense," he panted, his fingers trailing lazily up and down your spine.

"Are you okay, baby?"

"Yeah... That was amazing." you murmur, snuggling closer to him, enjoying the afterglow of their lovemaking.

As you lay there, spent and satisfied, your the aftershocks of your orgasm. You nod weakly, a contented smile tugging at your lips.

Azriel smiled, his fingers gently stroking through your hair as you nestled against him. He could feel the warmth of your body pressed to his, the steady beat of your heart against his chest.

"I know, baby," he said softly, leaning down to press a tender kiss to your forehead.

"And it's only going to get better from here."

His hand trailed lower, his fingers finding your hip, where he gave a gentle squeeze.

"Now rest, we've got plenty of time to explore more later when you can feel your legs again." He taunted with a tired grin.

You sigh contentedly with a fucked out smile on your face, feeling utterly relaxed and loved. You close your eyes, letting the warmth of his body envelope you, and drift off to sleep in his arms.

Watching you drift off to sleep, Azriel couldn't help but marvel at the beauty of the moment. Here, in his embrace, safe and protected, with his beautiful mate, it was everything he could ever want. And now, it seemed, he had it all.

With a final lingering look, he allowed himself to relax fully, his breathing evening out to match yours. As he drifted toward sleep, he knew one thing for certain - this was just the beginning.

[anzulvr]

idrk how to request— BUT WHAT ABT READER AS HIS SPARRING PARTNER ?? above average strength but obv he would win though he ended up hurting u, what do u think would he do? LIKE DOES HE DISREGARD THE FACT THAT THEY'RE IN PHYSICAL ED AND JUST CARRY HER AND THEN WHOO—

Summary: Karma × Reader getting hurt while sparring// fluff 🎀// I luv him pls sorry this took so long it deleted 😭😭

❝ sect. 01 pre fight ❞

— There weren’t many reasons you got paired up with Karma in to begin with,

One: you begged Karasuma- (he said no)

Two: Korosensei pulled strings for you, only because you're his favorite couple. (You’re literally the only official couple in class so he doesn’t have many options to choose from but still.)

You were so sick of Karma going easy on you. You're just as capable as anyone else in class, sure you came into eclass with zero fighting experience but you've been progressing over time. Even then, he didn’t budge on his stance on not wanting to throw hits the times you were paired up.

Karma wasn't one to underestimate people, anyone who wanted a good fight could get one- he'll even offer them a head start but you're a different story.

He wouldn’t lay a finger on you even for class, wouldn't that make him a shitty boyfriend?

Anytime you spare he guides your hand, takes your hits and high-fives you if you do it right, he does anything but retaliate.

So much so Karasuma refuses to pair you up together because the most Karma will do is dodge.

Luckily today Korosensei managed to convince him.

You spend half the class time begging Karma to just throw a jab swearing up and down you could take it.

"You nearly broke Nagisas nose but you can't hit me once? I'm asking you it's fine!"

"That's different, that's Nagisa, you're you."

he dodges as you swing your anti-koro knife

"So what?! Are you saying Nagisa can take it but I can't?"

"[Name] you know that's not what I'm saying. I just mean I can cope with giving Nagisa a nose bleed, I don't want to hurt you."

you swing again, this time getting the side of his torso

Karma grabs your fist and yanks you towards himself

“Got you.” He sticks his tongue out

"Im not saying you have to go ballistic— I'm just saying you can put up more of a fight."

"Alright fine, but if you feel like I’m being too rough tell me to stop.”

“Deal!”

❝ sect. 02 aftermath❞

— You should've kept your end of the deal but you didn't say anything cause he’d feel bad. The pain all over your leg and thigh was killing you.

He hadn’t even hit you — he kept tripping you over and over again, in his mind it was pretty harmless but enough of a jab to keep you happy except it wasn’t harmless you kept biting your tongue every time you fell on a rock and it burned even harder than the last time.

He didn't notice until you struggled to stand up and he saw blood trickling down your leg, he crouched down to where you were at in an instant.

"[Name]..! Why didn’t you say anything— , are you okay?"

"I didn't want you to regret sparring me! It's fine it's not bad just a little blood, plus I got you a few times too.”

"I’m so stupid. Sorry [Name], can you stand?”

Your leg was fine it was more of a big scrape that worsened each time you fell on something sharp and didn’t tell him, disinfecting it and wrapping it up would fix it.

He pulls you up from your hand, "I'm pretty sure Korosensei has the shed packed with medical supplies let's go there."

Karma’s willing to carry you on his back if you want him to.

❝ sect. 03 at the shed❞

— He has you sit on a stool inside the shed while he looks for bandages, "Towels... paper... Korosensei's weird stash of Magazines... where the hell are the bandage wraps?!"

You point behind him "Karma isn't that a first aid kit?"

"Oh yeah- good job [name]! Wait let me take a picture of his stash to blackmail him with first"

(He has his priorities straight)

He quickly takes a picture of Korosensei's pile of Magazines and returns to the issue at hand. He gently cleans your wounds and wraps them, something he's done plenty of times for himself, not much of a difference.

You swing your other leg, "this is kinda weird… I'm usually the one doing this for you."

He smiles for a moment "I thought the same thing!"

Once you’re leg is all wrapped up he asks you to stand up to see how everything felt.

“Thought of how I can make it up to you yet?”

"It’s not a big thing! Plus this is the first time I've gotten injured in a fight so I feel pretty cool.."

"Pffft yeah?, you look cool too— imagine the crazy stories you can make up when people ask how you got that."

"Im gonna tell people I survived a lion attack."

"Sounds good, I'll tell people I saw it go down so it's more credible."

With one hand still on your bandages he kisses you and for a moment you forget where you’re supposed to be, he pulls back and laughs for a second.

“Ditching class to kiss a guy [name]? Wouldn’t expect that from you.”

“We’re not ditching- and you initiated it, let’s go before Korosensei finds us and lectures us again.” You shivered at the thought.

When you come back to class Korosensei was frantically looking for you.

“Karasuma told me he looked away for a second and you too were gone! I looked everywhere- where were you?!"

Funnily enough Korosensei looked everywhere except the shed he was so worried he forgot to check the area yet flew internationally 10 times.

"We went to look in the shed for medical supplies."

"The shed of course! Why didn't I think of that... anyway I'm glad you're alright, what happened to your leg [Name]?"

"A lion... it's alright I took care of it."

"A lion..?"

"Yeah- you should've seen her teach, she won a fist-fight with a huge lion, all by herself."

Korosensei’s face flashes green “full points!”

He didn’t actually believe that but from the look on his face he got the hint Karma was the one who took care of your injury and that’s all that mattered to him.

a/n sorry if this is bad😭, tell me if there’s any spelling mistakes pls !! And sorry for the late post :)

[yccoffeesimp]

𝑊𝒉𝑦 𝑑𝑖𝑑 𝐼 𝑠𝑎𝑦 𝑂𝑘𝑖𝑒 𝐷𝑜𝑘𝑖𝑒| ??? 𝑥 𝑅𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑒𝑟

TW: G0r3 & C@nn¡B@lism at the very end.

You stayed up the entire weekend writing the short story. You didn't want to think too hard about what to write, so you went with the easiest option. Fantasy/ adventure. It was already time for the next club meeting when you finished.

You wanted to show the others but to whom? Choose-

-Blade

-Dan Heng

→ Jing Yuan

-Gepard

->'Best to show Jing Yuan first, after all, he is the president and the one who gave us the assignment.'

You thought. You then slowly began to walk to him with the two flat papers in hand. "Lovely to see you again, Y/n."The ivory white-haired man said, smiling at you.

→ "Nice to see you as well Jing Yuan."

"Oh before I forget, I'd just like to say. If you have any suggestions for anything regarding the club such as activities or problems, don't be afraid to inform me." He said, crossing his arms, his cat-like smile still present on his features.

→ "I'll keep that in mind but I'm going to go with the flow as I get settled in."

"We all need time to earn our footing." He slightly laughed.→

"Say you wanna read the short story I wrote?"

You ask, handing him the papers as he nods. It didn't take long for him to finish reading the two papers of the short story. When he gave the papers back, he had a light smile.

"Excellent work, Y/n, I underestimated your writing capabilities. Say Dan Heng enjoys this type of writing style, the fantasy and the way with words is extremely moving and it paints a picture in your head as if you were in it yourself." He closed his eyes as he spoke, nodding ever so slightly.

→ "You lost me."

"My apologies, I didn't mean to wander. But regardless, it's very well written, and I enjoyed reading it. It captivates the reader and that's what is most important in any form of literature."

→ "Yeah I guess so."

"Since I've read yours, would you like to read mine as well?" He offered.

→ "Sure."

"Sorry if it isn't any good, I'm not as creative as most are." He smiled awkwardly, unfolding his arms across his chest as they landed at his sides again. Reaching for the paper that he had written on, which laid on the desk beside him, before handing it to you.

You took the soft, thin paper examining the words written on it.The story was about a group that called themselves Space Rangers and one of their amazing adventures. The story was rather vivid and from what you could tell no spelling or grammar mistakes. This is to be expected from Jing Yuan after all he is the valedictorian student.

You set the paper down as you looked at Jing Yuan."Is it bad?"He then asked.

→ "Are you kidding me? This is amazing!"

You exclaimed, this caused him to smile."I'm glad you think so, I feel as if I could use more practice on wording it better and try not to go into details a lot. Just proves I have a lot more to learn."

→ "We all could. Well, I'm going to go see what the others wrote. See ya around Jing Yuan."

"If you want to chat more, I'll be here." He smiled before you walked away.

Who's next?

→Dan Heng

-Blade

-Gepard

→ "Maybe I should go see Dan Heng next. He probably has some constructive criticism for my writing. I mean he's writing his own novel so.."

You thought, before walking up to him. He was sitting near the back of the classroom, hunched over that notebook that was said to contain that novel of his. Dan Heng didn't notice you until he looked to see you approaching him.

→ "Hey Dan Heng."

"Greetings {name}, is something the matter?" He asks, setting his pencil down for a brief moment.

→ "I was wondering if you wanted to read the short story we were assigned to read."

You said, you felt your voice slowly become high pitched as to not knowing how to talk to the guy. All you knew was that he was Dan Feng's, the future owner of Vidyadhara Industries, twin brother. He paused for a moment, thinking about your words."I'd be happy to." That was all he said.

You handed your paper to him, his attention immediately went to the paper in his hands. It only took a minute before the paper was handed back to you.

→ "So how was it?"

"It was well written, I must say. The movement with the words... It's unique, it makes you feel as if you're truly there." His words carried honesty and truth, you somehow couldn't help but be flattered.

→ "Thanks."

You plainly said. "I take it that you want to read what I've written for the assignment?" He spoke. You nod as he takes a slip of folded paper out of the notebook he was previously writing in. He passed it onto you, your hands unfolding it. You lightly scanned the paper, his handwriting was neat.. Words were in clear and constructed sentences. It was a small script of the romance genre.

→ "Wow, it's really good. You wrote this by yourself?"

Dan Heng nodded. "Just a small script, a friend of mine says I need to try to write new different genres.Some authors get boresome if they write the same genre over and over.. Or at least that's what they said."

→ "I kinda agree, sometimes the plot just repeats itself a lot."

"Speaking of such.. Any suggestions?"

→ "Huh-For what?"

"For my writing attempt at romance."

→ "Oh- Well I'm not an expert. It's good by my standards. I frankly enjoyed it."

You handed the paper back to him, it was folded neatly as it was before. Dan Heng took the folded material before staring at it for a short while. "I'm glad you enjoyed it." He spoke, putting the piece of paper back into the notebook. He then opened to a page and began writing, ignoring your existence once more.

Choose-

→ Blade

-Gepard

Might as well see what Blade wrote. Maybe you could learn more about him. All you knew was that he was one of the troublemakers of the school. Easily had fights and many were sent to the nurse's office on several occasions because of him. You remember having him in your biology class once, he didn't show up except for when it was final exam season.He sat at the back next to one of the windows. His arms crossed along his chest, with his hair covering a majority of his face.

As you walked up to him, you got a closer look. He seemed to be holding a small piece of paper. You didn't realize you were staring at him before he spoke. "Is there a problem.?" He asked, his voice was laced with irritation and annoyance at your actions.

→ "Uh- Not really.. I wanted to ask if you wanted to uh- read the short story thing we were to write..."

He scoffed. "You do realize there are others here who can read the damn story, right.?"

→ "Yeah well I want you to read it."

"Hard pass. Now if you'd excuse me, I'd like to be alone."

→ "Well can I still read yours in the meantime?"

Blade didn't reply but he did look at you for a short while. He groaned, handing you the small piece of paper."If it only means you'll leave me be, take it."

♡- You received Blade's short story!

→ "Don't you want it back?"

"No." His answer was blunt and he looked not in a good mood to continue chatting... Best to leave him be and move to the next person.

But first do you want to read the short story now or later?

Choose-

-Now

→ Later

→ ' I'll read it when I get home from the meeting. I still have to read Gepard's.'

Gepard was near the podium of the classroom, he seemed to be writing something down before his eyes caught you walking towards him."Oh- Hey {name}, is there something you need?" He asked, trying to cover up the paper he was writing on.

→ "Yeah, just wondering if you wanted to read my assignment and to check up on ya."

"Oh- Well, I'm doing fine at the moment. Also, I'd be glad to read it. I heard from Jing Yuan that it was really good." The blonde smiled. You hand him the piece of paper. He gently took it in his hands before reading it. Now that you looked closer at him. He almost looked tired yet he always slept in. The eye bags he had were barely noticeable but they were still there. Your train of thought was interrupted by Gepard handing the piece of paper back. "Like I said, it's amazing."

→"H-huh?"

Did Gepard say something when you were spacing out? "{Name}? Are you alright?"

→ "I'm fine, Gepard... Just thinking and thank you for thinking it was amazing."

You smiled. A small smile followed from Gepard when you did.

→ "Can I read yours now?"

Gepard froze, looking away from you for a moment. "The thing is...-"

→ "You forgot to write one."

Gepard nodded. That was probably why when you left Jing Yuan, Gepard went up to him. Probably to inform him that he forgot to write a short story. "I haven't had time to, you know how much of a handful five-year-olds are..."

→ "Lynx really is giving you and Serval a rough time then if you didn't have enough time to write a story."

He nodded.

→ "Ah, I see. Anyways, what were you writing earlier?"

Your gaze falls on to the piece of paper on the podium. Gepard followed your gaze to the paper. "The short story.."

→ "Speed writing?"

"I have it already written but I haven't proofread it yet."

→ "I can do it for you."

Gepard smiled at you. "I don't want to bother you with it {name}, I can proofread it-"

→ "I insist. It's the least I can do for you."

Gepard thought for a moment before sighing. He gave you the now slightly wrinkled paper for you to read.Some sentences didn't make sense but then again it wasn't proofread. The short story was a historical fiction of the history of Gepard's hometown. The scenery of Belobog was different from the scenery of the Honkai Star City. Snow-covered meadows, a chilling breeze... It was a winter wonderland from what Gepard described it to be as back then before the Eternal Freeze. You took a pencil and helped Gepard rewrite some sentences.

As you helped him though, you couldn't help but feel a pair of eyes watching you as you did so. You looked up from the paper the paper briefly and saw no one was looking and the feeling vanished. But when you looked back at the paper, the feeling returned. You pushed the feeling away as you tried to focus on the story.

"Thank you,{name}, for the help," Gepard said once the proofreading was done.

→ "No need to thank me, just doing my duty as your friend."

"Still... It means a lot." He shortly smiled. He opened his mouth to say something else before a loud crash sounded. Your attention snapped to a broken teapot on the floor at the back of the classroom. Boiling water poured from the now shattered object. Dan Heng and Blade stood in front of it, a shocked expression on Dan Heng's face and a rather annoyed expression on Blade's. "Crap.." Dan Heng mumbled as he went to grab the broom from the closet at the back.

Blade simply stared at the mess before completely walking over it. "Well, that's the first.." Gepard mumbled.

→ "First of what?"

Gepard looked at you before looking back at Blade and Dan Heng. "Normally when they even interact with each other, there's always an argument that follows before Jing Yuan breaks it up. But strangely they haven't been arguing.."

→ "They argue a lot?"

The blonde nodded. "We don't know why but they really hate each other. We never really questioned it either." He shrugged as Dan Heng came back to clean the broken ceramic.

→ "Imma go help Dan Heng real quick."

You grabbed some stray papers from your bag before walking to Dan Heng to pick up the spilled water. The floor was dried and the teapot was thrown away. "Thank you for helping, {name}."

→ "It's no problem. Just helping a fellow club member."

Dan Heng gave a short nod, but you could've sworn he smiled too.

-×-

Jing Yuan clapped his hands together. "I'm happy to say this concludes our second meeting with our new member." He started, his cat-like smile on his features. "After sharing our short stories, how does everyone feel?" He turned to look at Gepard first.

"It was nice," Gepard answered.

Then he looked at Dan Heng.

"It was quite helpful." He replied.

Then at Blade.

"It was... eventful." He scoffed.

And then lastly at you.

→"It was interesting."

Jing Yuan nodded, his arms crossing in front of his chest. "I'm glad to hear we all have at least positive outlooks on today's activity. Perhaps we can do the same tomorrow but as for now, the club meeting is over." And with that, you began to walk home. The sun was already setting with the moon peeking its head out ready to take its shift in the sky.

-♡Blade's Short Story: ......The blood sprayed over the walls. Agonizing screams echoed throughout the halls, a blade dragging across the skin of the captive. A maniacal laugh follows, their eyes looking longing at the beating heart in their hand. Blood oozing from the organ as its former owner's limbs became limp. "Finally mine... all, all mine..."

A voice said. They tilled the organ upside down over their mouth. The blood poured from the heart's atriums into their mouths."Not enough, not enough.." They gasped before throwing the dead heart away. Now ripping at the throat and torso of the dead body. "I can't- Need more.." They gasped one more time before all humanity in them was lost...

~Fin~

Pins: @sarcastic-cookie

[the-solitary-child]

Kipperlily Copperkettle analysis, this is a long one so click read more to read all of it.

Kipperlily Copperkettle. Halfling Rogue. 

The Model Minority.

Her parents work good jobs, respectable jobs. One of them is a realtor, they are charismatic and good with words and they work hard. Hard for their family, hard to keep things in order. The other works in bastion city, away from home and with the council of chosen. A noble job, one that is met with praise and awards. It is a good job, a respectable job for the greater good.

Her family is good. Her family is picture perfect, with two parents and a kid and a white picket fence.

She must be perfect, for her sake, for her parents sake. Halflings are kind. Halflings are sweet. They get along with everyone. They are peacemakers, so much so that humans and elves could come and take solace from them. Years of bloody history and violence brews in her veins, and she is supposed to be complicit and smile and act kind. She does so for her parents sake, with a slicked back ponytail and a perfect uniform and a smile too big, too unnerving.

I’m sure people tried to dissuade her, telling her that she wouldn't find more comfort in something different? Maybe a job as a clerk or a secretary, or an artificer so she could help build things for people. She has her mind set though, with her nails digging into her palms to control the bitter rage that boils in her as she is only ever underestimated. 

High school starts and it's supposed to be a new beginning. She will find her party, and she will make friends. And she does, sort of. The High Five heroes she calls them, setting herself up as the leader. She has to take control of everything. They don't really listen to her though. Oisin and Ivy are immediately their own little duo, as are Ruben and Lucy, although Lucy has made a point to include Kipperlily too, and Mary Ann just acts uninterested in everything thus far. She has to make sure everything is perfect. A fight happens during the first day of school. It results in two students death, and makes the principle commit murder suicide on both himself and the counselor in order to bring two students back. Maybe that's where it started, the jealousy and the burning hatred and the obsession. Maybe it started a little earlier that day, when Riz handed out his business cards, and Kipperlily took it. Saw his name, maybe even wanted to be friends at first. Maybe he was too busy with the case of missing penny luckstone, maybe he was too busy with the friends that seemed to care about him. Maybe Kipperlily was jealous that his party actually cared about him, whilst hers only tolerated her at best.

I think that's where it started. The jealousy, the obsession. Her anger got worse, nails digging into skin and drawing blood. She is just so angry. She has always been angry, rage and spite boiling in her blood. Her parents said she came into the world not crying but screaming, like existing in this very world hurt her. She studied him. She learnt everything about him as the year went on and she felt shame. Burning, red shame. She started seeing the new counselor in hopes of getting help. She knew this wasn't normal. She was just so angry and had nothing to do with all this rage and fury. So she talked about it, how she was jealous of him. How he got the perfect adventurers story, a dead dad and a party full of people who cared. Her parents were normal. They were perfect, blended in perfectly. They were kind and sweet and polite and possibly never home because they have busy jobs. Busy respectable jobs. They were respectable people and nothing more because the world would never allow them to be anything more.

One way or another, Porter hears of a halfling rogue with rage in her veins. One way or another he approaches her, tells her that he will help her. He sees her potential, he sees just how great she can be. Kipperlily believes him. She trains with him, learning from him, hooked on to every word of praise he gives her. She is special, she is meant for something great, this school is just unfair and hands out blatant favoritism and she has to stop it. 

Kipperlily takes the rage star, lets it fall into her chest and every petty grudge, jealousy and dislike simply turns to wrath and hatred. She gets her party to join her too, leveling them up with the help of porter and jace. She kills them. She stands over their bodies as rage stars are forced onto their chests. As their corpses are violated and they are brought back just as angry as she has always been. Kipperlily feels no guilt, this is what she is meant to do Porter tells her. She is meant to bring greatness.

Lucy is the only one who doesn't come back. That hurts her, in a way different to anything she has ever felt. Lucy always had her back, always had her side when the party was ganging up on her. Lucy was the only one who understood what it was like to be put down and underestimated. But..she stayed dead. She decided being dead was better than being with her. 

Kipperlily tries to move on but sorrow and rage just burn deep within her.

The rest is history. But one thing is clear, rage has always festered in the heart of Kipperlily, and when she tried to get help, when shame burned in her veins at how childish her rage and jealousy was, she was failed by the people she was supposed to trust. Her rage was used as a weapon, both against her and against others. She was told she would do great things, that she is special and her spite and jealousy was used in order to get her to do things had her teachers not failed her, maybe she wouldn't have done.

Kipperlily will forever have the blood of her friends, of her party members, on her hands. She will never get rid of that shame, it will stain her hands, it will stain her legacy. She is nothing more than a villain in the history books now, when in reality she was a teenage girl who was failed over, and over again. She was a teenage girl who felt rage, and felt ashamed of her rage because she was told she needed to be kind, complicit. A sweet halfling girl, something she never was and never will be. 

[ayyyez]

For whichever Naruto characters you'll get inspiration for: how do they think they would do babysitting vs how they actually do. Who'd be overconfident and fail miserably? Who would avoid it at all cost but turn out amazing? Who is bad with kids and knows it? Who'd be a supernanny?

A/N: oh yeah, sure thing my friend! These were fun to do. Thanks for sending in a request!

TAGS: babysitting headcanons, fluff, soft headcanons, hehes, gremlin Madara

CHARACTERS: Neji Hyuga, Shisui Uchiha, Shikamaru Nara, Madara Uchiha, Tobirama Senju

NEJI HYUGA: Okay so genin Neji would not be thrilled at the prospect of babysitting. He'd also be a little cocky thinking he'd have no problem wrangling a bunch of kids. He underestimates these trouble makers however and has a woeful time dealing with their "backtalking" and "incessant questioning of authority." That's him— he's the authority. Neji sweetie they're kids. Won't lose them though with his Byakugan and kind of scares them into behaving with his demeanour.

Teen/Adult (Jonin) Neji now is a lot more mellow and less harsh. He's going to be a lot softer and understanding. Is actually less confident with the task but does a lot better. Bends down to the kids level to talk to them. Treats them the same way he does adults in the way he talks to them but his tone his gentler. Is patient with their questions. Reads to them. Teaches them life lessons.

Don't tell anyone but he gives them piggybacks.

SHISUI UCHIHA: The best damn babysitter you could ask for and he knows it too. If you tell him though he'll get all bashful about it. He's so good with kids! Talks and plays with them like he is one. Being around kids helps him reset and forget his troubles. He can't help but want to protect them and their childhoods. Because of this just wants to show them the best time.

Kind of sneaky about the games he teaches. The games teach them strategy and how to think on their feet. Real world shinobi skills to help them learn how to hide and escape if they ever need it. Shisui also picks the littler kids up and zooms them around. Piggyback rides and races. Rolling down hills. Lots of laughter and fun.

Always letting the kids win and encouraging them when he can.

SHIKAMARU NARA: Doesn't matter when this is Shikamaru's always going to think it's going to be a drag babysitting. He's going to look for the easiest way to mind these kids. Think smarter not harder is his motto. Doesn't think he'll do a terrible job nor exceed expectations. He's there to tick a box. What he doesn't expect is to be kept amused by the kids. Having back and forth banter. The kids telling him "jokes" and stories.

Ha. So maybe babysitting isn't so bad. The kind of babysitter who is like 'Alright, I'll give you some treats if you don't tell your parents.' Totally has a secret pact with the kids. Teaches them all sorts of cool things. As long as they don't have to go anywhere or do anything too annoying.

The kind of babysitter the kids think are cool.

MADARA UCHIHA: Do not let this man babysit your kids. He's a terrible influence (affectionate). I don't mean big bad Madara either I just mean regular gremlin Madara. He's going to have your kids running wild and promoting their chaos. He has a complex where he both thinks he's the best babysitter in the world and thinks he's also going to fail big time.

Okay in all seriousness though he's good for kids who have a lot of energy and need to run around. He'll match their energy and do what they need to do to get all of that out. Won't bring any negativity to the table either. Just encourages them to go go go. And is behind them the entire time. Doesn't care about the mess either. Those kids want to roll around in mud? Alright mud fight it is. It's war baby. Takes those wargames very seriously. The kids call him sir and everything lol.

He encourages chaos in order to keep that watchful eye on them. He actually does an alright job.

TOBIRAMA SENJU: Great teacher. Terrible babysitter. Terrible with teensy children. Good with school level children in a teaching environment. But he just can't babysit. He's so bad with children that aren't his own or his students. He's just so awkward. You know how people hold toddlers like they're wild creatures with their arms completely stretched out in front of them? That's him holding them.

Everything becomes lectures when he talks to them and he's so theoretical and awkward at connecting and knows it. He honestly chooses to just not babysit.

I want to point out though he is really good at teaching children when they're his students. When they're old enough to somewhat take care of themselves and he just has to teach them the rest and theres time to make a connection—he can't explain it—it's just different. Like tweens he's good with tweens. Genuinely enjoys seeing the next generations flourish he just doesn't have those babysitting skills.

[nshtn]

💖 what does creep ed do if reader tries to escape? is he upset or does he understand? maybe both?

💖 on the flip side, how would he react to them totally reciprocating his feelings?

💖 and similarly, does he crave affection or does it freak him out?

i love this weirdo!!!!!

Writing this from the timeline of the reader being with him long enough to know he loves them.

1)

He gets extremely depressed, but rabidly manic, about keeping you contained/alive. You must understand this - he needs you and cannot be without you. You are the beacon of light-hope, flickering dangerously.

He understands.

To go out is to allow yourself a permanent reprieve from horrors that peck your eyes out. To gutter the flame is a preservation of your innocence to the true nature of Gotham. It must be horrible to be with a beast like him, barely a man, trudging about with stories of death wrapping around his neck. He's sorry, he is.

He'll do better. Tell him how. Please? Edward will beg if he has to. Edward will cry and grovel his way through your capture. Edward will tie you and bind you tightly to this realm with skin-safe rope and a gag if he needs to.

You are irreplaceable, priceless porcelain. Don't worry... he gets it... he'll pay more attention now. That's what you want, right? Attention?

Edward will read and reread every crumb of information he can about you to optimize his care. Infront of you. He will ask the most invasive and personal questions and manipulate the answers out of you in the righteous goal of your taming, your eternal placation of his presence.

He will wash you every day and every night, hold you close more often, and do more with you, but you will be far more heavily restrained for a while and he'll randomly sob while holding you, feeling an incredible guilt collapse on him. You cannot go, though. You cannot ever go.

Outside of your general scope of view, he will become more reckless and violent towards those he believes contribute to Gotham's inequality.

2) See 3 first.

He would delight in it and take full ride of your new found affectations once he mentally accepts them, burying his face in your hands, looking for your touch and praise around every corner. He will show you the horrifying things he does in your name like a cat presenting a hunt, eyes gleaming at you, waiting for your heavenly approval. He will teach you his craft and ramble in your ear as you drape yourself across him in his lap. He'll take your suggestions for dinner and feel your skin against his as often as you'll allow as payment.

You don't need binds anymore. Just a collar... a chip, maybe... and... and a cute little jingly bell... please...?

He'll also let his hands get away from him when holding you exploratively, reaching and grasping around in an effort to delight in the treat of sounds you might make knowing you now approve of this arena of contact. He will be baptized with the slick of you if you don't have boundaries to assert.

You have truly underestimated how fast of a learner Edward is. You have, perhaps, also underestimated just how often his disappearances after spending mere hours bathing in your glittering shine has been to please himself to the thought of your acceptance. It is tantamount to sex to someone as pervertedly deprived as him. You're practically a fetish.

He has your browser history. He's read it. He likes to study you. You're so cute when you squirm. You're adorable when you breathe a little harder when his fingers brush there.

Good luck.

3) Both? Both. Why do you like him? Tell him all about it... he doesn't see what you do. You're probably just saying it because you have to. You must secretly hate him. No one could ever love Edward. No one did for thirty-something-odd years, and it changes now? Impossible. You've simply deluded yourself...

Edward fearfully pulls away. He reverts to being more cold, to keeping his outfit on more often, burying himself in his work in an effort to avoid the pain of opening up... and when you rest, when your eyes flutter shut, he holds you tighter than anything. When he comes home each day, before the deep red has been scrubbed off his boots, he's tangling you into his lap and swimming in your homely scent. Hot, cold - all a fear-fuelled front opposing insurmountable, cascading, recursive desire that leaks around its' cracked-cap edges.

Once he is convinced through defeating the seven deadly sins of his avoidance of risk in possibly losing you by opening up to you, though... see 2. How you convince him is as mysterious as he is, however.

[alligator-teeth]

*coughs* maybe some crumbs of dragon albedo?

Crumbs? Anon, for you, you’re getting the whole goddamn pie.

Princeps Cretaceus Chapter: Savior Amist the Snow

Pairing: Dragon Albedo x Human

WARNING: This story contain soft, safe, sfw vore. If this makes you uncomfortable, please do not read this story.

Word Count: 2100

Summary: After getting lost in one of Dragonspine's infamous blizzards, you come into contact with one of the mountain's many legends, who decides you help you in a very unorthodox way.

The blizzard is an unrelenting force of pure fury that casts the cruel landscape of Dragonspine in a wasteland of white. Snow blocks your vision, and the wind whips your hair askew, screaming like the ghosts of lost adventurers who came before you. They’re warning you to turn back; yet how can you, now that the path you’ve taken has been swallowed up by the storm? Ice clings to your clothing, weighing you down as you continue trekking forward, forcing your legs to take steps you can no longer feel. The snow is up to your knees. You don’t even know how you still have the will to keep moving anymore.

  Like many before you, Dragonspine is severely underestimated, despite its colossal size and intimidating reputation. The mountain towers over Monstadt like a lone soldier protecting its most precious treasures within. You grew up on the tales told to you by your mother and father, of an eternal winter that never goes away, brought forth by forces too ancient for even Barbatos to remember. The mountain has never left your mind; it stays stubbornly put on the edge of your imagination with fortitude no human can possess. You’ve dreamt of climbing it and exploring the ruins scattered among the snow. You want to see what the famous landmark hides.

  The adventures at the Angel’s Share laugh at you. “You can’t conquer Dragonspine,” they say. “She’ll eat you alive. No one makes it to the peak and lives to tell the tale. If the frostbite and hypothermia don’t get you, the hilichurls and whopperflowers will. And if they don’t manage to catch you…the final thing you’ll face is the dragon.”

  You never wish to conquer. You simply want to discover. Hilichurls and other monsters don’t scare you. You aren’t a newcomer to adventuring, and you’ve done your fair share of exploring the wilds of Monstadt. You know how to defend yourself, even without a Vision. And as for the stories about the dragon who terrorizes the mountain’s peaks…well, it’s exactly what people say it to be: a story. Dragons don’t exist anymore, and any sightings of this mysterious beast are repeatedly proven to be false. Dangerous as it is, Dragonspine is simply nothing more than a mountain. It is a mountain you will climb.

  It took you three days to make it to where you are now. You thought you were ready. Nothing could have prepared you for just how brutal the climate truly is.

  You start to move your right foot forward, but it suddenly gives out. You can’t feel yourself faceplant into the snow. You can barely find the energy to lift your head up. Everything feels strangely light, like balloons have been attached to your arms and legs and are now slowly lifting you into the air. Your teeth stopped chattering long ago. You suddenly realize how nice it would feel to fall asleep, right here where you are.

  This is it, you manage to think. This is how I die. Yet you really can’t find it within yourself to care. You knew what you were getting into. What does it matter? You’re tired. Just so tired. Your eyelids droop shut on their own accord, and your head slumps back into the snow.

  Deep beneath the packed layers of your freshly fallen grave, you feel a faint vibration. Followed by another. And another. Gradually getting closer…or is it farther away? You can’t tell. Part of you thinks you should be concerned. What if it’s a bear? Or a clan of hilichurls? Are you really this close to having a peaceful death, only to have that stripped away from you by being eaten alive?

  Warm air snorts down on your back. You hear what sounds to be a very surprised noise from above.

  Lazily lifting your head again, you peer upwards and meet the gaze of the massive dragon looking right down at you.

  The creature blinks its sky blue eyes. It looks…a bit shocked to see you lying out here. For a moment, the two of you simply stare at each other.

  “Hello,” the dragon says. Its voice is male, surprisingly soft and smooth, with a slight accent that sends shivers down your spine.

  You open your mouth to respond, but find you cannot move your tongue. All that comes out is a low, shaky whimper.

  The dragon’s ears droop a little. Moving his head closer, he sniffs you deeply. You can see freckles of gold scattered across his snout. White scales that blend in with the blizzard sparkle like the purest crystals from Liyue’s Chasm. You catch a glimpse of an aureate diamond centered in between the beast’s clavicles. It’s an angel, you think. An angel from Celestia itself.

  “You are freezing,” the dragon murmurs. “I cannot pick up your scent.” He leans back. “Your case of hypothermia is rapidly becoming extreme. At this rate, it is only a matter of time before you die.”

  Well, he doesn’t have to tell you that. You’re pretty sure you know when you are close to dying or not.

  “I don’t understand why you humans insist on venturing into these sorts of temperatures. Your bodies simply cannot handle it. So small and fragile you’re kind is…” He sighs. “You especially. I will have to take you in.”

  Take me in? you wonder. What the hell does he mean by that?

  The dragon continues to ramble on. “While I do not enjoy resorting to such…uncomfortable methods of rescue, I feel there is no other way. Listen to me, little one. You must remain as still as possible, alright? If you fight, you will do more harm to yourself. Just…trust me.” He arches his neck downwards again and carefully noses you out of the snow. The movement upsets your failing body, and you whine. He shushes you with a reassuring coo. “Hush. I know this is not ideal. But it will be over soon. I will get you warm. You will be much more comfortable where you are going than out here.”

  You still have absolutely no idea what he is talking about…until the dragon opens his mouth wide. You find yourself peering up into a pair of jaws lined with serrated teeth that make the canines of a polar bear look blunt. He hovers his head directly over you and dips his tongue underneath your torso. Vertigo lurches through you when the dexterous muscle lifts you up into the dragon’s waiting maw. Raising his head up, you slide a bit onto the tongue’s center. What little light manages to pierce through the blizzard is shut out when the great beast closes his mouth shut.

  For the first time since you started this doomed expedition, you feel fear. It begins as a tiny pebble sitting in the center of your gut. Then it becomes a stone, taking up space. That stone grows quickly, forming a boulder, heavy, oppressing, snaking its tendrils through your veins and lighting them on fire. Your heart quickens with dread. The dragon lathers you in saliva, tasting you, preparing you for the journey you are about to take. Behind you, his throat pulses, quivering anticipatingly for its newest victim. You are going to be swallowed. The dragon is going to eat you alive.

  You begin to squirm, feebly pushing the tongue away. “N-No,” you choke out. “Stop.” You don’t want this. This isn’t how you wish to die. “Please. Don’t…Don’t kill me.”

  The dragon pauses. You think you can hear a heavy exhale whoosh from his nose. Then, he purrs and gives you a squeeze with his tongue. It’s not harsh, not painful. Rather, you almost get the idea he is trying to offer you comfort. Why such an imposing predator would want to comfort its prey is beyond your understanding.

  The beast tilts his head back; the tongue loosens and frees you from its grasp. You stiffly slide backwards, still too cold to properly resist. Your legs catch in the ring of muscle at the edge of his throat. A might gulp echoes around you, and with no problem, you are sucked in with no time to even fathom what comes next.

  You are terrified. As the tight muscles of the dragon’s esophagus constrict and force you down, down, down, you can hardly find the room to think or even breathe. Your consciousness is utterly consumed by the beast you are now within. Squelching gulps ring in your ears. A mighty heart thumps with excited vigor, overtaking your own. You feel like you are melting into him, becoming part of him, losing any sense of self because of how overwhelming all of this is.

  You are small. You are scared.

  After what feels like hours later, just as you think you might completely lose your mind, you slowly slide into an open space. You plop onto a squishy floor that jiggles a little when you land. The dragon’s stomach growls happily, welcoming you with an instinctive hug. Warm, wet flesh embraces you, smothering you with its affection from all angles. You cannot see anything, but you can feel. The beast is all around you. You are in his belly for good.

  “There we go,” the dragon says. His voice is soft, yet it comes from everywhere. “I knew you would make it safely. How are you doing in there, little one? Feeling warm?”

  You don’t respond. The heat of his body has successfully fought off the numbness. Feeling is gradually returning to your limbs. With feeling, though, comes trembling. Trembling from the cold…and the fear.

  The dragon’s belly squeezes you again. He’s getting a feel for you, figuring out where you are. “Little one?” he calls, sounding worried. “You are shaking.”

  Tears leak from your eyes. You shove the stomach walls away, heart rate elevating dramatically. No. Nonono. This can’t be happening. You can’t just…just disappear like this. There is no way Celestia has doomed you to be a dragon’s lunch.

  “...Ah. I see. You are afraid.” The dragon sighs. “There is no need for panic, now. You are safe. I have done quite a lot of research into the practice of…well, consuming organisms alive, little one, and my experiments have provided me with multiple conclusions which have told me that digestion is only triggered if I wish for it. I am currently not in the practice of ruthlessly killing any humans I come across, and you don’t take to be very appetizing, being as you are half-frozen with much of your flavor hidden-”

  “You…aren’t helping,” you interrupt, holding your head in your hands.

  “...Noted. My point is, you are safe. If I wanted you dead, I simply would have ignored you and left you to be lost in the blizzard. But I don’t want that. And I know you don’t want it, either. My body will provide you with the necessary warmth to return to a stable condition. Once we are back in my lab, I will let you out and nurse you back to full health. It may take a few days, but I can promise you will make a full recovery. Just please…trust me to protect you.”

  You curl up a little and ease yourself into the stomach floor, choosing to ignore the implications of this massive creature having a lab for the sake of your own sanity. The dragon flexes his abdomen and hugs you for a third time. More soft, gentle rumbles reverberate around you, soothing your petrified soul. Your heart beats in tandem with the beast, and it…eases you.

  “Am I really safe in here?” you timidly squeak.

  “Yes,” he replies. “I swear it. You will be okay.”

  “...What’s your name?”

  He doesn’t seem to have expected you to ask that. When he answers, his voice is tender. “I am Albedo. What is your name, little one?”

  “Y/N.”

  “Y/N.” Albedo hums. “A beautiful name. It certainly suits you. Y/N, please do not be afraid of me. From here on, I will keep you safe. Rest. There is nothing to fear from my belly. It will provide you with all the comfort you need.”

  You nestle into the warmth. Your eyes have adjusted to the darkness now, and you find you can just barely make out the grooves of the stomach’s walls. Reaching out, you gingerly run your fingers over the floor. The belly shivers and murmurs, cuddling you. You feel strangely calm once Albedo begins moving, his gait easing you into a comfortable rhythm.

  “You are safe,” he whispers once more. And now, you find yourself believing him.

[aihoshiino]

Hi hello!! I adore your oshi no ko analyses and chapter reviews/thoughts! I always make it a point to, whenever a new manga chapter releases, always to read your reviews after reading the chapter =3=

I wanted to ask!

What are some of your Hoshino Ai headcanons?

I had a very silly one for quite a while ever since the DVDs were brought into the story and that is when Ai recorded them, there were times she had to stop what she was saying and walk out of frame after hearing baby Ruby crying or something like that. Just having the twins interrupt her and just turning into a wholesome, funny thing for Ai.

GOD I HAVE SO MANY AI HEADCANONS I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHERE TO START… I'm constantly playing Blobo TV with her in my brain both for RP/fanfic purposes and also just for when I'm bored at work lol so I have so many in my head… So I'll rapidfire a bunch off the top of my head!

Ai can't cook! Most of her meals are premade stuff or like, bentos bought from supermarkets, etc. She was never taught literally Anything about cooking when she was younger so she has zero instinct or starting knowledge or lbr even time to try and learn, but she commits to at least trying once Aqua and Ruby are born. She is absolutely not good at it even when she really gets her nose to the grindstone but eventually becomes passable. Ironically, she's actually better at baking then cooking, because baking recipes are WAY more precise and exact and she has an easier time when she has a set of Very Exact Step By Step Instructions to follow.

On a food note, she has really bad spice tolerance…!!! Anything hotter than like, the medium spicy Golden Curry range is so far out of her strike zone it isn't even funny. Ruby is the same (a hold over from eating mostly bland food as Sarina) but Aqua really likes spicy stuff and his tolerance is really good as a result. Unfortunately, he also doesn't really realize just how high his tolerance is - it was way worse as Gorou so he keeps underestimating how hot things are. So anytime Ai is like "hey Aqua how spicy is this" he's like "oh it's not too bad" and then Ai takes a bite and dies and it takes years before they manage to figure out the differences in their tolerance LOL

She's a little clumsy…! It's a side of her people rarely see because she's so graceful and careful as an idol, but the #1 way to tell she's comfortable with someone is that they're allowed to see her being a bit of a failgirl.

I mentioned this in another ask but I like to think she gets back into video games on her hiatus… not super deep, but she grabs a cheap secondhand GBA SP and one of those carts that's like 20 puzzle games in one or something and keeps playing it even after she goes off hiatus. Since she's so busy, it's easier for her to get into things like Tetris where your play sessions don't have to be that long and there's no story to follow… anything like an RPG would be no good. Eventually one year, Aqua and Ruby pool some money and get her a jailbroken DS or something for her birthday and even though she has a bajillion games on it, she mostly still just plays Tetris………..

She really wants to be a plant mom but her schedule means that she inevitably gets so busy she forgets to water them and they end up dying and she's depresso every time…

Appearance wise, between the twins, Aqua is actually the one who looks most like her - Ruby definitely does too but grows more into her own features as she grows up, whereas Aqua still really strongly resembles Ai even once he's all grown up.

She has a ton of those influencer ass hyperspecific trendy gadgets and appliances around the house, not because she buys them but because companies keep sending them to her in hopes of getting her to promote them and she never does LOL. If she actually gets a sponsorship deal through work then she'll do it, but even then it's mostly her just hyping something up and saying she uses it every single day when 90% of the time they just end up rotting at the bottom of her drawer. Pretty much the only thing she ends up regularly using is like, toiletries and hair care products and that's just because it saves her having to shop for them but she has absolutely zero brand loyalty.

As an adult, she copies a lot of her fashion sense from Miyako! Her style leans more girly and fresh than Miyako's does but Ai doesn't really care about clothes so she never developed a sense of fashion growing up. But she knows Miyako is a pretty stylish person and looks up to her as someone to emulate fashion from. Of course, when she's incognito or chilling at home, she still always prefers her comfy hoodies and sweaters and plain, loose clothes.

Ai likes Kana a lot! This was technically canonized in the Da Vinci interview and I felt so smug when I saw it lol. But I've always thought Ai would like Kana - she sort of vicariously enjoys her cheekiness and confidence and admires her drive and her passion and craft at such a young age. When Kana joins B-Komachi, Ai sort of recognises how much of her fire has gone out and its immediately like free daughter??? Free daughter for Hoshino Ai???? She and Mem also get along really well but because they're closer in age, the dynamic is more friendly coworkers whereas she and Kana have a more senpai/kouhai surrogate mom figure thing going on.

she's our strongest aqukana warrior btw

Aaaand finally… If Ai had ever found out about Aqua and Ruby's past lives, she would have loved and accepted them all the same. If anything, knowing just how terribly alone and starved of care they both were would have encouraged her to make sure they felt loved, safe and accepted as her kids. After all, Ai, too, is a "motherless child" as Tsukuyomi describes the twins - she'd absolutely understand.

[ihopesocomic]

Sorry for the mini-essay but I think people massively underestimate how much hard work and dedication goes into a Passion Project. People think that creators who make free content, who do their work as a hobby and not as a job, must only get enjoyment out of it.

That’s not how it works. Doing it purely because you want to doesn’t automatically make the more challenging, frustrating, or (gasps) TIME CONSUMING parts of the project any less burdensome. If anything, it makes it worse because you aren’t being paid for all of that labor. You’re just doing it for the sake of doing it, and as rewarding as it can be, it can also be demanding.

Im finally publishing a fanfic for the first time and don’t get me wrong, it’s been great to get feedback on my work and interact with a community. I love that there are usernames and profile pictures I can actually identify because they’re regulars on my work.

But does that mean I don’t have to constantly redo work because I don’t like how it turned out? No. Does that mean I always update on time? No. Never get burnout? No. I still very much go through all of the things paid writers do, because the Creative Process is difficult and demanding no matter what they paycheck is or isn’t.

And all of that is just if you guys WERE missing updates, which you’re NOT. So like… these complaints are not only very entitled and ignorant, but also just confusing. People really just be mad for the sake of being mad, I guess?

Anyways yeah, free content creators are still content creators, and passion-driven hard work is still hard work. You two are cranking out absolutely STUNNING visuals, compelling characters and engaging worldbuilding every single week and that’s amazing. Thank you for your hard work and I’m sorry about the twerps that don’t appreciate it enough!

Ah the price we pay for being human and having a brain, amirite haha

It's to be expected, to a certain point, that people simply don't understand that things like comics and cartoons take time. General impatience is something that can be ignored. If people asking for updates bothered us, we wouldn't post anywhere ever haha You gotta have at least SOME backbone if you want to do a comic. Or anything really.

Comics are a TON of work, and I knew this going in cuz I've done shorter comics before. It is not to be treated as if its easy. (Well, its easier than animating a whole series by yourself LOL) There's a lot of pre-comic planning that people don't tell you about. And that's just the stuff you have to do before you even start drawing. Of course this only applies to long-form storytelling, there's different rules for different kinds of comics.

And I won't even get into what it takes to making the comic itself, there's a lot of parts that need to be considered like formatting, time-management, what shortcuts you have to take to save on labor, and getting across as much information as you can in a short amount of time, while using mostly visuals. It's a skill, so it can be learned haha

A lot of doing comics is on-the-job training. Which I know can be frustrating for perfectionists, but from a reader's perspective, part of the joy of webcomics is seeing how far the art has come. And you can't exactly get out a webcomic if you keep redoing things over and over. You'll burn yourself out even faster. This is why it's important to have a plan lol it just makes it easier to adjust if you have to change things, than if you have no plan at all.

Even if RJ and I for whatever reason no longer felt passionate about this story, and wanted to move on to something else entirely, we wouldn't leave everyone hanging. We'd tell everyone what happens one way or another. Because too many people just abandon a story just to tell another one, and that's not fair to people who were here to read a story that appealed to them.

But the entitlement of people sucks, the constant heckling, the fact we can't moderate our own comment section, and more importantly Webtoons just sucks as a site anyway. - Cat

[insertdisc5]

Devlog #16: Answers and Questions

Hello everyone! Welcome to this month’s devlog!

If you just stumbled upon this, I am Adrienne, also known as insertdisc5! I’m the developer, writer, artist, main programmer, etc of the game. The game being In Stars and Time, a timeloop RPG, which is also the next and final game in the START AGAIN series, following START AGAIN: a prologue (available here!).  You can find out more about In Stars and Time here!!! 

LET’S GET TO IT. This month is Q&A: Cohost edition!

“A Q&A again?” Heheh well I don’t have anything to talk about this month ✨ We’re working hard on finalizing the localization! And on porting to consoles! And on secret stuff! You know, the usual!!! Get excited!!! So, Q&A again 💖 And see, I asked questions for Q&As on Twitter. On Tumblr. On Discord. But some new social media platforms have entered the fray. SO.

Welcome to Q&A: Cohost edition. (Follow me on cohost and/or read this post I wrote about why I think cohost is neat teehee) (and follow me on bluesky if you want. I like it way less though. Sorry bluesky)

@ItsMeLilyV asks:

One of the bits of advice that gets tossed around by indie devs is to avoid making RPGs, especially for your first few games, because they tend to be large in scope, difficult to prototype, and easy to underestimate.

Was this ever a fear for you in making START AGAIN, or In Stars and Time? Did you take any special precaution to keep these games within a scope you could handle, and did you learn tricks from START AGAIN that carried over to ISAT when in came to keeping things manageable? Thank you!! ✨

I had no idea that was a piece of advice given, but yep, that makes a lot of sense! Since I didn’t know, I went in blissfully aware, teehee.

I will say that I am familiar with working on big projects from working on comics, and with seeing big webcomic artists always mention to never start with your magnum opus… And I could tell ISAT had the potential to be way bigger than I imagined, which is why I decided to start with creating the prologue to get used to RPGMaker as well as making games. Kind of a pilot of sorts!

Again, thanks to comics, I know to keep my scope pretty small, because even if you keep it small it WILL balloon into something way bigger than you thought. Just for the prologue, I imagined it’d be a 20mn game, and it’s easily a 2-3h one! Keep your scope small!!!

As for tricks, when I catch myself thinking “wow what if I added this cool thing”, I try to always keep in mind those two things: 1. How long will it take to implement (including bug testing), and 2. Does it add something important to the game. I know we always want to add a fishing game, or a fun minigame, but do you Need It. Does it add something substantial to the story, to the Themes. Or are you just adding it because you like fishing games. Which is a valid reason, but also, maybe just make a fishing game instead. You are not the Yakuza series!!!! You are a small indie gamedev!!!! Think about you in 4 months who has to fix all the fishing game bugs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

@stem asks:

how is it to have a piece of art that's basically done (as far as i understand) that you can't share yet? like how do you personally bide the time until it's finally ready to release, or is it not really a challenge to wait? :0c

It’s so weird!!! The game has been done for so long!!! I’m very glad I asked some friends to playtest the game, so I could at least get some feedback before the game is out… In some ways it feels like the game will be done twice: once back when I finished making the game, and once when the game actually comes out. It’s just a very strange experience. Sometimes people tell me they’re excited to find out more about this story beat, or about this character, and a part of me is like… Wait, haven't you played the game? Oh, yeah, it’s not actually out. Guess you’ll find out later.

EDIT: My god. I just checked on my private devlog for when I completed the Alpha of ISAT. It was in August of last year (I lay down on the floor and look at the ceiling) (I still had to finish all the illustrations so really the game was Done Donezo in October but still…)

anon asked:

What role did Armor Games play in creating the final product?

SO MANY THINGS. Here are some of them: support when it comes to porting/marketing/social media/localization, feedback on the game and how to make it better, community guidance, testing support, QA/internal testing… The game couldn’t be the way it is without them.

For more small details, I have a weekly meeting with my producer, Dora! We talk about the game and how everything is going. A couple months back, I also was checking in with the internal QA team fairly often to fix any remaining bugs. They also helped me find ISAT’s additional programmer, Isabella, and she is a godsend because coding is hard. They also take care of communicating with press, finding more opportunities to showcase the game in conventions, talking with the localization/porting teams… I am probably forgetting a thousand little things they did to help out!!! THEY’RE SO GOOD OK

Anon asked:

So obviously the skills/spells/what have you are based off of Rock, Paper, Scissors. Did you design each "type" to be like a certain style? Rock being heavy damage and defense buffs, scissors being speed and quick attacks, like that?

Absolutely! I just went with the obvious. Rock is physical damage, defense focused, Scissors is swords, attack focused, and Paper is magic, mind focused. It was fun to develop a spell system around those! I’m excited for people to find out more about Craft…

@nickshutter asks:

I really loved START AGAIN (streamed it for a small handful of friends) and was super happy to hear about a follow-up! The cast is so much fun and their personalities are really well-balanced—did any of the characters change pretty drastically from their initial conception during development of the game?

I’m so glad you streamed it with friends… I hope you had a good fun time…

And for sure! Isabeau and Mirabelle were pretty set from the get go (himbo and shy wallflower), but Odile started as more of a gentle teacher type, even if I very quickly went the snarky old lady route. Siffrin and Bonnie were harder to pin down– I wasn’t sure how to portray Siffrin’s despair in the prologue, and started showing them more overtly depressed, but I thought it’d be Very Yummy to have them show a happy facade to their friends. And then, for ISAT, I had to figure out what a non-depressed Siffrin would be like, for the first couple acts of the game before the despair sets in. As for Bonnie, I had a lot of trouble figuring out what they’d be like, what kind of kid they were, what their relationship with everyone else would be like, and then I thought about what their past would be like and then their characterization was set in stone. Sometimes you need to figure out One Thing to unlock a character’s brain. I’m very excited for everyone to find out more about each character in ISAT!

@SuperBiasedGary asks:

What games (or other media) lit a fire under you to create your own?

It could be stuff you liked so much it inspired, something you found frustrating because you felt an itch to do it differently, or something that made you realise humans make things and you could be one of them.

I found a lot of indie games inspiring, but I think Umineko might’ve been the one that made me go… Oh, anyone can just make a massive video game narrative. And you can make it very simple, with kinda goofy sprites, and still manage to make an incredibly touching story!

As for frustrating games that lit a fire under me, I think I’d say in general, I found issue with the classic trope of the “main character helps people and doesn’t get anything back”. What often happens in some games is that you help NPCs with their problems, sometimes helping them with very intense, complicated problems! For a very long time! And, in exchange, you get… A cool item? A nice new skill? And that’s it?

I know this might be complicated to implement on a narrative perspective, but I remember playing Persona 5, and your character just went through a very harrowing experience (like, oh, being INTERROGATED AND TORTURED BY THE POLICE) and you help your friends during social links, and they go “thanks for your help! Bye~” like WHAT ABOUT ME. WHAT ABOUT MY PROBLEMS. CAN YOU GIVE ME A HUG

So on a certain level, I wanted a game where instead of the characters around you having problems, the main character also has problems. And is subconsciously screaming “CAN YOU PLEASE NOTICE I HAVE PROBLEMS AND GIVE ME A HUG.” And hopefully, the characters notice. Winks

Hm. I do want to say I wrote most of the prologue/ISAT during the pandemic, and I felt very lonely and not supported. But then guess what. I told my friends about how I felt. And most of them told me they had no idea, and vowed to support me more. And now I’m closer to them. So the moral of this answer is, yeah, it’d be nice if people noticed, but also, you need to tell people when you’re feeling bad. LOOKS AT SIFFRIN

Anon asked:

Is there a song you listen to in order to put yourself in the sasasa/ISAT mindset?

I have a whole playlist baybee. Before you ask: there aren’t any hidden meanings behind those song choices. It’s about the Mood, and also my personal tastes in music I listen to when I need to concentrate. I like songs that go WUB WUB

 In no particular order, here are five random songs I played on repeat when making the prologue:

Future Club (Arcade Version) by Perturbator (in bold because this was THE song I listened to on repeat. I believe I gave it to Lindar for inspiration lol)

Arcades by C2C

Wake Me Up by Para One

The First Wish by DROELOE

Les Enfants du Paradis by World’s End Girlfriend

And here are five random songs I played on repeat for In Stars and Time:

Down by Chloe x Halle

Nonsense Bungaku by Eve

Non-Breathe Oblige by PinocchioP

Gentle Heart by Jamie Paige

Ready For The Floor by Hot Chip

It’s interesting, the songs I listened to for the prologue are generally more heavy and frenetic, while the ones for ISAT are more hopeful… I made sure to listen to more lively songs for ISAT, since that’s the feeling I wanted to give off…

That’s all the questions I have! In other, non related ISAT news, I have started a new project and having a lot of fun. It’s a visual novel this time. I’m hoping to get some screenshots ready in the next few months, but also I’m taking it easy on this one. If it takes years with many breaks in between to get it done, it’s fine. What matters to me right now is the process!

That’s all I have to say for today! Let me know if you have any questions, or if there’s any aspect of the game development struggle you’d like me to talk about! See you next time!!!

AND DON’T FORGET TO WISHLIST THE GAME ON STEAM ALSO IT REALLY HELPS BECAUSE STEAM’S ALGORITHM IS MORE LIKELY TO SHOW OFF GAMES WITH A HIGH AMOUNT OF WISHLISTS THAT’S THE REASON WHY GAME DEVS ALWAYS ASK TO WISHLIST!!! OKAY BYE!!!!

[vierss-herondale]

Please tell me your favourite thing(s) about Clace! I'm rereading TMI and I just am falling in love with them all over again. I'm at CoFA, they're FINALLY officially together, and their banter is ON POINT (they come by it honestly. Wessa, yk yk.) But YEAH . And also ramble about Sizzy too if you're into it, they're hitting SO hard this time and I'm in love in love in love with them.

Bestie, I don’t even know where to start 😂

The fact that during TMI most of the people saw Clary as this tiny little girl and they underestimated her but Jace realized very quickly how STRONG she really was! Like, he kicks her ass for real during training! He knows she can take it! And she’s the bravest person he knows!

And how everyone sees Jace as this strong warrior but Clary knows the fragility that lays underneath his tough exterior. Most of the people describes Jace as "hot/sexy" but Clary almost always thinks about him as ✨beautiful✨

Don’t even get me started on how Jace lacked love for so long in his life, even thinking that his heart was broken and he was incapable of falling in love… and then he met Clary, someone with such a big heart and with SO MUCH LOVE to give, and then they fell in love! ♥️

It makes me so sad that during TMI Jace had such a low faith in himself because of the way Valentine raised him. That he thought he had to be perfect or the Lightwoods would kick him out. Can you imagine that? Living with such fear of losing the love of the only family you ever know? 🥺🥺 That's why I love the fact that Clary's faith in Jace is so big and it NEVER lacks! And she makes sure he KNOWS it. That he can always count on her and her love for him.

And the fact that even when Jace was taught that love destroys you, he was never afraid of loving Clary! He said that loving her was the best feeling he ever felt. In many other books you see the male protagonist keep the girl away because they are afraid to fall in love but Jace never did that, quite the contrary actually.

I love how they complete each other, and how they helped each other to be better! Jace learned so much from Clary, and became a better version of himself, but Clary also growth so much after meeting him!

I also love how they pick on each other so much! They know how to have fun!

Listen, I know it's SUCH a big cliche and judge me all you want but I LOOOVE how Jace was mean to everyone but Clary lol In my defense I was a teenager when Wattpad was a hit and the bad boy trope was on every story 😂 So yeah, I like that he’s such a sweetheart with her and ONLY her 🫶🏻

How Jace looks at Clary as if she's his personal miracle 🥹♥️

I love that she NEVER slut shamed Jace! I have seen that some part of the fandom judge Jace for sleeping with other girls BEFORE HE MET CLARY. Like bro? It's his body and he was single, I don't see the problem and I love that Clary never judged him for that. She always knew that what they have is different from anything Jace could have had with other girls. I love a secure female character 🫶🏻

Also girl the way he's SO OBSESSED with her! He worships her so hard! I love those kind of male protagonist!!!

There's LOTS of things I love about Clace but I might never finish listing them so let's just cut it here lol

Now about Sizzy... I love that couple because they always seem like such a REAL LIFE couple to me.

Look I'm such a sucker for love at first sight couples like Clace BUT the reason why I love Simon and Izzy is because they are so real about the way their relationship developed.

In real life most people falls in love more than once in life and that's normal and it's okay. You can go through heart break and be hurt but that doesn't mean that you can't fall in love again and it be even MORE stronger than before! Simon represents that so well. He loved Clary so much for many years but then he realized they didn't work like that, and his love transformed into friendship love.

And then he fell in love with Izzy and it was a stronger feeling! This time he knew he belonged with her. That's just like real life is, you can fall in love more than once but it doesn’t mean that your previous love was less valid.

And Izzy is such an amazing character, she was the one that taught teenage me that you can wear makeup, dresses and high hills AND STILL KICK ASSES while doing so!

I think she's such a brave character because she carried the pain of her father's betrayal on her mom for so long... But she overcame it and she was brave enough to open up her heart to Simon. This comes from someone who went through something similar at a similar age and believe me, I KNOW by first hand how brave and strong Izzy had to be to let herself trust someone else with her heart. She’s so special to me.

And she opened her heart to Simon TWICE! They are a couple that went through a LOT and it makes me so happy to know that they are engaged now ♥️

[thelightsandtheroses]

Into the Fire

Pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader

Summary: Joel isn’t the only one who loses a brother to the Fireflies in Boston. In the wake of your rage, Joel Miller is the only one who can understand you and that changes everything.

Warnings: Mentions of alcohol, some good old fashioned angst, hints of smut, It’s not explicit but minors DNI/18+. I have not included any age references or physical descriptions of the reader to try and keep this is as inclusive as possible however it is a female reader. There is also no explicit cheating, but there’s an ambiguity that could be interpreted either way.

Word count: 1.7k

Notes - This is not only my first ever Joel Miller fic but it’s the first time I’ve been able to write in over a year. I’m very nervous about posting this, but I hope you enjoy it.

“Takes one to know one, so take it from me/ You've been lonely/ You've been lonely too long” Dust to Dust – The Civil Wars

The world pretty much ended years ago, but you survived. You tried to forge your way through it all, endure everything just to find a way to stay alive and stay you. It’s been years but once again your axis has twisted, and you don’t know what to do.

The last fifteen minutes are replaying over and over again, ever more embarrassing and you’re not entirely sure how you’ve ended up at this apartment, but you have.

Joel Miller is staring at you with an unreadable expression, one arm leaning against the door you’ve been knocking repeatedly.

“We have to stop them,” you say as he moves to let you in the apartment.

“We?” he asks, his tone somewhere between amused and furious, as he walks into his kitchen.

“Yes, we. I spoke to my brother and he’s useless so it’s down to us. They’ve lost it, Joel. Leaving the QZ? The Fireflies?”

“Probably,” Joel says.

You knew your circle of friends wouldn’t fight your little brother on this, but Joel? You were certain he’d help you. Especially after seeing his face when your respective brothers made their announcement.

Joel, however, he was a different story. You had known Joel vaguely for some time. Your family and his group had made it to the QZ at the same time, but it was through your best friend’s smuggling that you knew Joel and his partner Tess. You still weren’t sure what their deal was, however neither Joel or Tess seemed the types to sit around and gossip about relationships.

Joel’s apartment is very similar to yours, however while you’ve tried to make your allocated apartment feel as much like a home from before as you can, Joel’s home seems stark, dustier somehow. There are few personal touches, just an out of place butterfly ornament in the kitchen you’re nervous to ask about.

“We can’t let them do this,” you add as loudly as you dare as he rustles around his kitchen.

“Oh, we can’t?” Even from the kitchen, you can tell he almost sounds amused. “They’re adults, sweetheart, they can do what they want.”

“They’ll die, Joel.”  You mean to sound forthright, firm and to the point but there’s a desperate whine in your voice that utterly betrays you.

Silence.

Joel places a glass of dubious looking alcohol in your hands and takes a large gulp of his own drink.

Your baby brother is joining the Fireflies. He’s still so young, he was just a child when everything happened and now him and Tommy have got it into their heads that they need to join the Fireflies. At least Tommy believes in the cause, you have a sneaking suspicion your brother just wants to fight, that it’s not about the cause at all. Maybe you underestimate him.

You don’t talk about what happened in those years before you headed for Boston, you keep those moments locked away tightly. You know how dangerous the need to belong is, how destructive it can get and why your brother might chase that.

“He’s not going,” you say, “I’ll stop him.”

“He’s not a kid anymore,” he says. “They’ll be fine. You need to let it go, find a way to move on, say goodbye right.” His final words poke at an open wound, because if your brother were to leave tonight then you’d never forgive yourself. His announcement tore all your scars open so you lashed out at him in a way you hadn’t before.

How fucking dare Joel Miller try and calm you down. You’ve heard enough about him to know this isn’t his personality – you know he’s angry about Tommy, you know they’ve been raging and fighting about this too. Why are the rules so different for you?

“You - you have no idea what you’re talking about,” you say angrily, “no idea at all.”

“I know what it is to look after your little brother. I know what it is to see that thrown in your face.” There’s quiet fury in his voice there, one that might not he directed at you, but you feel anyway.

“It’s different,” you say, taking another swig of alcohol.

There are two years you cannot talk about, not because of what you did or didn’t do, but not talking about them doesn’t mean they didn’t happen. Your brother and you were moulded from the fires of that hell and emerged different. Stronger perhaps, but mostly different.

“You can’t stop him, you know you can’t,” he says, his voice a touch softer.

You don’t reply but take a healthy swig of your drink. There’s half a bottle of whatever crappy whiskey this is on the makeshift coffee table; one you know you’ll need a refill from in a moment.

“You realise that he isn’t leaving you, he’s just joining them,” Joel says pointedly.

“It’s the same thing.”

“No, it ain’t.”

Oh.

Oh.

Joel takes a hard gulp of his drink as you find yourself staring at your hands. You hadn’t thought about how it might feel for Joel. You’ve been so busy drowning in your own brother’s betrayal there was no room for anyone else’s pain. You take a breath and let Tommy’s words come back to you hours before for a moment.

“The things we did …”

You remember how Joel’s face had tightened, how he’d looked away for just a moment but when he had met his brother’s gaze again, his eyes were duller and his posture had straightened minutely.

You knew your brother was leaving you to go believe in the Fireflies, but Joel thought Tommy was leaving Joel because he didn’t believe in him anymore. That had to sting.

“We were meant to stick together,” you add in a small voice because that is what hurts you the most. The only way you and your brothers have survived this long is together and now your baby brother wants to mess with that. He wants to go outside where the Infected, who could tear you apart in a moment, are at least the most predictable threat he’ll encounter.

For a moment you sit in silence and use the time to observe Joel Miller. You’ve known him a while, however this is the longest time you’ve ever spent with just the two of you in a room. He’s always seemed so unknowable, so intimidating, fascinating but terrifying in equal measures. Who would have thought your brothers would be the bridge between you both? You’ve felt lonely for so long, even in a crow, and you’re sure Joel must feel the same. You can feel it too.

One drink turns into two and find yourself shifting on the sofa, one knee pointed towards him, an elbow on the top of the so far with your drink sloshing around in that hand and your gaze directly on his.

You’re staring at his lips. You shouldn’t be staring but you are. You notice how he downs his drink, how his deep brown eyes meet yours, seem softer than earlier somehow. There’s still a hardness there but the edges seem muted, blurred.

You need to stop staring at his lips.

You swear you can see the edges of his mouth twitch, almost like a smile if you didn’t know better.

You shift momentarily, move just a little closer to him because right now Joel Miller understands you. You understand him too.

You’re not sure who starts it, who is the one who brings their lips to the other first. Maybe you realise it at the same time, maybe you don’t.

You’ve thought about this before. You thought that Joel would be different, more like the man you’ve known for the years. You expected him to be cold, aloof, perhaps even perfunctory.

Joel Miller is desperation and need though.

He touches you like there are only moments left before you’re taken from him, his kisses are hungry, never satiated. “Wait – wait, what about Tess?” you ask, pulling away. You are more out of breath than you expected and every part of you wants to continue but you need to ask.

“It’s –‘s not like that,” he says, “You don’t need to worry about it.”

“I don’t want to cause -”

“Tess and me, it’s not like that. We’re not like that.”

He is everything and nothing like you expected.

His hot hands skim down your ribs, down to your legs, warming every part of you. As they move up between them you hear yourself let out a low noise.

“Oh yeah?” he whispers before kissing you harder.

Your jeans are unbuttoned and you hurry to push them down, to get closer, to be with him.

You didn’t realise how much you had ever wanted Joel until now.

The two of you are a mess of hands, gasps, and groans, pulling off clothes, getting as close as you can. You are both desperate, lost things but for a moment, just one moment you don’t feel so alone.  

It doesn’t matter you’re on a couch, that this is surely just a release of pain and a desperate need to connect with someone.

Afterwards you lie on the sofa, watch him pull his jeans back up, stand up and get another bottle of alcohol before pouring two more drinks. You watch the walls that have broken down over the past evening slowly rebuild themselves. It’s disappointing but expected.

He opens his mouth as if to stay something then stops himself.

“Don’t overthink it, I’m not,” you lie. “I won’t – I won’t tell Tess.”

He makes some sort of affirmative grunt that tells you that perhaps his resolute denial of whatever him and Tess are together was exaggerated or if that’s your anxiety. You wonder if it’s just because he’s a man who cannot show any weakness, any vulnerability anymore.

Right now, you don't want to analyse it anymore though. You don't regret it.

"I should go," you say.

"No, no - you can stay," Joel replies to your surprise. "If you want. Easier than tryin' to get past the guards at this hour."

"Okay." You take a sip of your drink, take a deep breath.

Your brother is leaving you but your world isn't going to end. The rage you felt has subsided a little now. It hurts, but you can make it through this.

You look at Joel, think about the unexpected but welcome twists of the evening, try to tell yourself it doesn't mean anything.

You know how this story goes. You will tell yourself it won’t happen again, but you already know it will. Time and time again.

[wings-of-ink]

If you're still looking for thoughts on Patreon: I haven't subscribed to many Patreons before, but so far it's been for extras + early access. Unfortunately I don't have enough money to subscribe to everyone I want to or for long periods of time, so I normally dip in for 1 or 2 months when something is released, cancel my subscription, and resubscribe at a later date.

It seems like people are willing to pay more for RO content (like side stories & RO POVs), nsfw content, + early access. So those might be ideal to place at higher tiers? I've also seen some creators do tiered early access. Like the highest tier will get the demo update 1 month early, then the next tier 3 weeks early, etc. with the lowest 1 week before it's released to the public. That might make the higher tiers worth it over the lower tiers, instead of giving them all the same amount of early access.

One concern is that some creators get burnout from having to create all the extra content for Patreon. I think a lot of people underestimate how much time & effort it takes and it may not be worth the payoff (depending on how successful the patreon is). I'd also be concerned that with Patreon extra content + multiple new WIPs there won't be much time left for the main game and it's likely progress will slow down. I've seen this happen many times before, even without Patreon it seems like most creators who have multiple WIPs don't end up finishing any of them.

Absolutely, thank you for sharing your thoughts with me, I appreciate that a lot.

The feedback I've had has given me some ideas on how to streamline what I would do. When I've done Patreon for others, I've rotated support between the projects that resonate with me the most as well. There's so many to pick from, I can't blame anyone for popping in once every so often instead of staying subbed. If you have the ability to afford it, more power to you, but most of us just don't.

Those key benefits are really what I'm wanting to focus on. I do like the idea of a tiered early-access too especially for peeps who just want that.

Patreon burnout is something I want to work hard to avoid; I've seen other creators struggle and stop enjoying their arts too. I want to do this in a way that I can produce things for you to enjoy in a way that is still enjoyable for me too. This is my passion and I don't want to turn it into "work."

I have the benefit of probably being less busy than most others who do this, at least as far as I can tell. I'm married with no children and no plans for any either. I'm older, out of college and settled in the drudges of a career. I've been at my job long enough I could do it in my sleep and it doesn't cause me a ton of stress at this point. When I work on the IF or on Tumblr, it's because I want to and it drives me - it's a form of entertainment for me as well. I'd rather do this than watch TV or scroll mindlessly. Even before I started the IF, I'd get comfy and just write something all evening, lol.

I do also have a tendency to take too much on because I get excited, so I'm using the info I've gathered to help me roll things back and keep myself realistic. So, I've determined that anything I do will be reserved to just a few tiers. We can always grow bigger later. I still do plan to rotate up to 3 projects. The second is to keep me from burnout on GC, and the 3rd is simply an outlet for me that I think others will find entertaining as well.

I have some solid time available coming up in October for me to hammer things out more definitely, so I'll be posting more around then about it. ^_^

Thanks again, my dear!

[zenkindoflove]

Surprise self-rec time! Pick 3 of your favorite things you’ve written and share them here, then put this in the inbox (anonymously or not) of your fellow writers to spread the positivity and help celebrate already written fics

(Added side quest from @achaotichuman, tell me what inspired your fics, why you love them so much etc etc, tell me EVERYTHING)

I can only choose three?!? *cries* Okay, I'll try lol.

...And Again Into the Light (Elucien)- This is a fic I cowrote with @crazy-ache. After our joint writing adventure where we wrote Dear Lucien, Dear Elain, we wanted to write together again. I suggested we write a horror romance story because I thought it would be a fun co-writing genre because we could leave each other with both spooky and sexy cliffhangers for the other to pick up. And that is exactly what we did. When we write together, we start with a basic idea and structure and we really "yes, and..." the rest of the process. I really like writing horror. It's one of my favorite genres and this was an opportunity for both me and Ariana to play around in that sandbox. And I think we did a DAMN good job at it. I think it's a pretty unique piece too, which is kind of a theme we've had in the projects that we've co-written. We both were really inspired by the idea of Elain and Lucien being trapped in a haunted house together, and what we ended up creating was a interesting exploration of the mating bond (because duh, it's them) on top of all the haunts and scares that were going on.

Kneel Before Me (Elucien) - I wanted to include this one because it was the first fic that came to mind when I read this question. I love this fic because both the inspo and the premise is kind of unhinged for me. This fic was entirely driven by fandom ship war wank. At the time, the new ship war topic of discourse was whether or not Azriel really could defeat Lucien in a blood duel, and the takes were driving me nuts. So, Kneel Before Me was me channeling my rage into art. The premise is Azriel and Lucien spar on the HoW's roof top and Azriel eggs him on into a real fight that tests the theory of who would actually win in blood duel like circumstances, followed by some hot Elucien smut where I might have went a little crazy writing an excessive paragraph long description of Lucien's dick because all of the bat boy obsessions, wing span jokes, and just generally people forgetting Lucien's existence and that he's HOT. And hey, look. I know when I'm cooking and I fucking COOKED with this fic. Even though I did tag it anti-Azriel because I wanted to be upfront that the fic doesn't depict him in a positive light, I've had a lot of Azriel fans read it and confirm for me that they don't actually think it's anti-Azriel at all and they like the twist I incorporated that made it all make sense and feel in character. Because even if I'm being a little cracky, I can't help but want things to make sense for the characters as they are.

Summer Heat (Elucien + Erixius) - This fic is my big multichapter fic that is now turning into a series with the sequel I'll write once I'm done with Pull Me in Deeper. The inspiration was really simple. One of my falling asleep day dreams included Elucien having some fun and awkward flirty moments in awkward and making out on the beach and I was like, "okay I keep thinking about this so I should write it." It definitely is an example of my first outline way underestimated the story it became. I didn't even initially have a plan to have a significant Eric x OC side story but once I created Alexius it really just became an animal of its own. This story I think is some of my best work in that it really spans the spectrum of my skills - comedy, romance, smut, angst, and generally a decent plot. It's the first time I made an OC. I did some new world building. And from experimenting with those the story blew up into something way bigger. I anticipate Golden Visions, the sequel, to be an even longer story which sort of gives you a perspective on how much I was inspired by both of those processes. At its core, I really wanted Summer Heat to be a romantic comedy. And I think it still has that essence but I'm not sure it can really be called that anymore with some of the angst and fantasy world building I built into it changed things. I also tried to write a slow burn for Elucien (and very much not a slow burn for Erixius) which I think I was successful at by my definition of a slow burn lol.

Thank you so much for this ask!!! This was so fun! I could write little paragraphs like this about all of my fics 🤣.