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acourtofwhatthefuck · 3 months

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Bluebird — Part VII — Azriel x Reader

Summary: Azriel and reader’s relationship with growing, but so are the tensions between human and fae. Reader is being yanked back and forth between what she think she knows, and what she knows she feels.

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Word Count: 5k.

Warnings: Mentions of masturbation/sex. Mentions of violence.

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Weeks passed, and thus began a routine.

You found yourself thankful for your father’s campaigns against the fae, only because of the freedom it afforded you. Him being away for stints at a time meant you had the inn to yourself, time to yourself — your excitement for which would once have been about losing yourself in your music.

Somehow…somehow, that enthusiasm had bled so heavily into the other factor at play. That with your father gone, you were able to have secret meetings with the man — male — who had begun to consume every one of your thoughts.

Awake, you daydreamed about him. Asleep, he visited you there, too. You had never felt so giddy, never known any feeling like it.

And for a fae male, too.

Sometimes, you wondered if you should feel guilt. For lying to your father, going behind his back. For the fact that Azriel came from the same species that had brutally taken your mother from you.

But this small, secret thing — whatever it was blossoming into — was solely yours. And it brought you such happiness that everything else seemed to fade away.

For three weeks now, Azriel had visited you without fail. On the same night, at the same time. The two of you had devised a signal — he would fly above the inn, and if your bedroom curtains were open, all was well and it was safe for him to winnow into your room. It had worked flawlessly, become a routine.

The only difference between those three visits was that he’d stayed longer each time. You certainly weren’t complaining.

Now, you sat at the dressing table in your bedroom, the curtains wide open and the stars winking at you in the sky. Your father’s campaign had taken him to a village a couple of hours south this week. The inn was locked up for the night, still and silent.

It wasn’t long before you were feeling that telltale prickle of awareness at the back of your neck — the one that always came seconds before Azriel stepped out of thin air. You turned on your dressing stool just as he materialised before you.

You supposed you were opposites in your appearance. He was all dark leathers and brutal weapons and snaking shadows. You were delicate as moonlight, in the slip of a nightgown, your hair unbound and face open. Opposites, and yet in a way that was most poetic.

“Sorry I’m a little late,” Azriel said by way of greeting. A little late was no more than five minutes. “I had some business to attend to at home.”

“I’ll forgive you this time,” you teased, your mouth curving into the small, giddy smile that you were sure you so often wore around him. “Is everything alright?”

“Everything is fine. Especially now that I’m here,” he held a scarred hand out to you. “How shall we spend our time tonight?”

Cooped up in the inn, there were only so many things you and Azriel could do together. But talking for hours, or reading to one another, or losing yourselves in music…Azriel didn’t seem to tire of any of it. If it bothered him that you couldn’t venture outside for a late-night stroll, he hid it marvellously.

“Are you hungry?” you asked. “I could dig out some food for a late dinner,” your eyes darted to the clock at your bedside. Gone midnight. “A very late dinner.”

A deep caress of a chuckle left him. “Sounds wonderful.”

So Azriel kept you company as you dug through your kitchen for anything that didn’t require cooking. As you gathered a small feast of cheese, cold meats, grapes and bread, it occurred to you that you had never once wondered what food might be like on the other side of the wall. What kind of foods did the fae even eat? Did elaborate dishes interest them, or was food just a means for sustenance? Did some have cravings? A sweet tooth? Allergies—

“What,” a deep voice brought you out of your thoughts, “are you thinking so hard about?”

Strong arms wrapped around your waist, and you couldn’t bite back your smile as Azriel buried his chin into your shoulder, his mouthwatering scent enveloping you. You watched in pure fascination as a shadow danced around you and plucked a grape from the plate.

“Do they…eat?” you blinked, purely amazed that the fruit didn’t fall through the mist-like form.

“The shadows?” Azriel chuckled gently. “No. They need no sustenance. They just…are.”

“And what of your kind?”

He paused. “My kind?”

“Faeries. Do you eat to stay alive, or do you eat because food tastes good? What would a faerie even eat? I mean…do you buy food from the market, or do you hunt for every meal—”

“Why would we not need food to stay alive?”

Something about his tone had you faltering — a sudden edge to his voice that made you think of sharp blades and brutal night. A beat passed before you turned in his arms to look up at him, read his face. But nothing was to be found there. Not by an untrained eye, anyway.

“Aren’t you immortal?” you asked.

“The fae live a very, very long time — provided we take care of our bodies.” Azriel answered tightly. “But we are living beings. We can be weakened, and we can be hurt — as you well know, considering you removed the ash arrows I was shot with.”

You hadn’t stopped to think of that. The memory of his pain, though, made you want to flinch.

“Yes, we enjoy food just as much as humans do. And we need nutrition and sustenance, just as humans do. Perhaps not in the same way, but we need it all the same, and the majority of us do not need to hunt for it.” His eyes — somewhat guarded and reserved — scanned your face. “We think and we feel. We are not just beings of violent tendencies made into appealing mirages to lure people in. We are not hollow statues capable only of bad.”

The words hung between you, strangely haunting and stunning. And it was amidst those words that you realised a wall had been ever so slightly risen. That you’d touched a raw nerve.

“My question offended you,” you breathed, still somewhat taken aback by the fervour with which he’d spoken.

It was Azriel, then, who faltered — and studied you.

His eyes flicked over your face, and something softened imperceptibly in his own.

“I know…I know you have more reason to think negatively of my kind than you do positively,” he lowered his gaze. “I know that you, personally, have suffered at our hands, and gods, if I knew who had caused you such pain, I would—” he cut himself off. Took a breath. Seemed to force himself to relax. “I understand why you think and feel what you do—”

“I didn’t mean to offend you.”

His eyes met yours again. They were once more the warm, honeyed eyes you’d grown used to these past weeks. “I know,” he admitted. “I just…don’t want you to think of me as a monster. I want you to know that not all of us are bad.”

That wasn’t so hard to wrap your head around, was it? There was good and bad all over the human realm. Why would it not be the same across the wall?

You just…needed to accept that the fae weren’t strictly how you had always been raised to believe. Not all of them, anyway.

Certainly not Azriel.

“I know,” you said earnestly, and his shoulders relaxed even more. “I’m sorry.”

“As am I.”

Your brow furrowed. “For what?”

A mischievous glimmer lightened his beautiful eyes, and his lips quirked into a smile as the shadow — that same one from before, grape and all — swam through the air to his mouth. And pushed the grape between his waiting lips.

“For stealing a grape,” he smirked.

You grinned, relieved that the tension was gone, and repeated your earlier words. “I’ll forgive you this time.”

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Bellies full, you drained your glass of wine and lounged back.

You and Azriel had thrown a blanket on the floor of your sitting room, your backs pressed against the worn sofa and your finished food in front of you. A makeshift indoor picnic of sorts.

Sitting together like this, it was easy to let the rest of the world drain away. A distinct feeling existed between you that you’d known Azriel far longer than you’d even been alive, and that came with ease, with comfort.

You nestled back against the couch cushions, allowing yourself to drink in the sight of the male at your side. He sat with his head tipped back and eyes closed — content to soak in the moment. So, so beautiful, you weren’t sure you could breathe. And to think he was at your house, by your side.

A shadow drifted up, lingering at his ear. Azriel seemed to stiffen, before his lips tipped up into a smile, his eyes opening and immediately finding yours.

As if…as if that shadow had told him you’d been staring. Had it known what you were thinking, too?

You narrowed your eyes, watching every fluid lope that it took back to his side. “Do they always tell you what I’m doing?”

Azriel chuckled — seemed impressed that you’d figured it out. “Not always.”

“But sometimes.” A thought struck you — one that had your face flushing. “Do they…do they know what I’m doing, even when they’re not here?”

“No,” the shadowsinger angled his head curiously. “Why?”

You shook your head. A change of subject was definitely in order.

Because it would be a lie to say that these past weeks, you hadn’t grown more…curious, in your body. In the sensations that had been awoken like kindling to a flame.

You’d had them before, of course, like you imagined most women your age had. But those desires hadn’t truly been desirous. They’d been…dulled, easy to ignore.

That had changed, as of late.

A couple of times now, you had awoken from dreams of rippling muscle, tan skin, wings. A melodic voice had lingered in your ears, and a heat had ached between your legs that hadn’t been relieved until you were following instinct and touching yourself, exploring yourself. You’d writhed in your bed and drenched yourself with sweat and muffled a cry as you’d crested that hill into release.

And it was Azriel that you’d thought about through it all.

Recalling it now had your cheeks scorching.

Azriel sucked in a slow breath, and his voice was a little strained as he asked, “What does that look mean?”

You cleared your throat. Shook your thoughts off. “I was wondering something.”

“…Wondering what?”

How to phrase the foreign thoughts that were filling your head at an alarming pace? This was all new to you — not just the clandestine meetings with a fae male, but every thought, feeling and sensation that seemed to follow. You were feeling too many things to keep up with.

And right then, in that split second, the thought that suddenly plagued you had you feeling something…unpleasant. Itchy and bitter.

“…Don’t you have anyone else you could be doing this with?” you asked, and Azriel’s brow immediately pinched. “Don’t get me wrong, I like having you here — I want you here…” Gods, you were making a mess of this. You flushed scarlet, wishing you’d just kept your mouth shut. “I just mean…another woman. Female.”

Azriel paused, seeming…surprised by the question. And you…you would have been happy for the ground to swallow you whole.

But then he was shifting on the spot, wings rustling, shadows stirring. He angled himself towards you and asked, “Do you mean…lovers?”

Yes, yes you did. But your nerve had vanished. Your cheeks burned.

Still, Azriel read the confirmation in your eyes. He studied you with an unreadable expression.

“I’ve had lovers.” Of course he had — five centuries was a long, long time to be alive. “Right now, though, I do not. I don’t see anyone. Except you.”

Shameful relief stormed you. There was no label on the, quite frankly, strange relationship you had with this male. Yes, you met regularly. Yes, the two of you kissed — a lot. But Azriel was his own person with his own needs. He was well within his right to fulfill them if he did so wish. With someone…experienced.

It made your heart pinch, though.

You were stolen from your thoughts by warm, scarred fingers touching your jaw. Azriel gently turned your face towards him.

“Have you been worrying about that?” he asked. “That I come here to see you, and then fall into bed with somebody back home?”

Such gentleness in his tone. You swallowed, reading his face. “I have no right to worry about it. You are…unattached. If you need to find release in somebody—”

“I don’t need to at all.” His voice was like silk. And his eyes…they unmistakably flickered down to your lips. “And on the contrary, I’m very much attached.”

Like a switch in your brain, that bitter, oily jealousy was replaced by…want. Need. To taste his mouth again.

Though he was the most common instigator of your kisses, there was no denying you’d grown in confidence with each one since that very first time. And that confidence aided you now, as you leaned forward and settled your hand on Azriel’s jaw. Slid your lips over his.

He kissed you back without hesitation, a pleased hum seeming to sound in a deep part of his chest. And just as you always did, you were becoming lost in no time, in his scent and his taste and the weight of his mouth on yours.

But this time was different, because you were different. More curious, more confident. You didn’t want to shy away from your intrigue or the new experiences that hovered just out of reach. You didn’t…didn’t want to just be the girl whose life was confined to this inn in this village. You wanted more.

Wanted Azriel.

You shifted where you sat, not breaking the kiss as you tucked your legs beneath you and pushed onto your knees. Azriel’s hand immediately steadied your waist, its heat permeating your clothes — and that in itself was…pleasurable. You breathed a sigh into his mouth, inching closer, closer, your hand slipping down to the collar of his tunic.

But just as quickly, he was pulling away. Pulling his lips from yours.

He panted, something dark and tempting in his eyes. And much to your disappointment, he rasped out, “We need to stop.”

You tried not to let your shoulders slump. “Why?”

“Because we’re getting carried away.”

You stared at him — his utter perfection. Did he…did he not want to take things that far with you? Maybe you’d read entirely too much into his kisses, more heated with every stroke. Maybe this was simply fun for him, and you…you would never cross his mind, if he were to take another lover.

You didn’t understand any of this. How it was supposed to work.

You rocked back on your rear, heat creeping up your neck — a different, unpleasant kind. One that made you want to bury your face and hide.

But before you could move another inch, Azriel was grabbing your hand.

“Don’t do that,” he said softly.

Your eyes inched up to his. “What?”

“Don’t be ashamed or embarrassed of what you want. Don’t regret having confidence.”

“…You don’t want it though, do you?”

He stared back at you. Confirmation enough.

“You don’t want me — like that. Because I’m inexperienced, or—”

He squeezed your hand. “It has nothing to do with that.”

“Then what is it?”

His eyes swept over you again, and they were…open — perhaps more open than he was normally comfortable with. Your own gaze fell to your joined hands, as he brushed his thumb across the back of your palm, and then laced his fingers in between yours. Locked them together.

“When we take things further,” he said, “I want to know that you trust me. I want to offer myself to you, knowing that you have no doubts about me. And I don’t think you’re there yet.”

“I—”

“It’s alright,” he squeezed your fingers once. “You do not have to justify anything. You have valid reasons for not trusting my kind, and I respect them,” his lips quirked up into a small, teasing smile. “It just means that I’ll have to put the work in to gain that trust.”

Your heart, in that moment, threatened to burst out of your chest. And perhaps things were changing, because you couldn’t imagine that many human men would offer such patience and understanding. Such respect. Azriel cared more about your trust than his pleasure.

Would this male ever stop surprising you?

“It’s not—not you,” you murmured, allowing your thumb to explore his scarred skin. “It’s just…complicated.”

“I know. Like I said, you don’t have to justify it,” he scooted closer, his leg now touching yours. “But…look at me, Y/N.”

You did.

You lifted your gaze to his face — and it wasn’t just the beauty that constantly threatened to bowl you over, but what now sat within it.

You didn’t need experience to know that desire coloured his face. That the way he swallowed, hard, seemed to be some sort of coping mechanism — to rein himself in.

“I do not want you thinking, for one second, that I don’t want you…like that.” His voice held a sudden grit that made you shiver. “Because believe me — I do. I want you, and I think about you, and when you’re ready — when you trust me — I will be honoured to give myself fully to you.”

The words alone…gods, they only made your blood burn fiercer. And you understood Azriel’s reasoning, respected it. But that didn’t mean you weren’t still aching.

“You’re not helping,” you groaned, bowing your head.

A silken chuckle skittered over you, and Azriel’s lips were at your cheek, brushing a kiss there.

“I’ve waited a very long time for you,” he murmured. “I can wait a little longer.”

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It was hard, flitting between the two versions of yourself.

There was the version of you that you’d always known — the one who pulled pints behind the bar at the Bluebird Inn and knew everybody in the village whether you wanted to or not. The version of you that had never considered life outside of this miserable place, because it had always seemed pointless, fruitless.

And then there was the newer version of you. The one who looked forward to that cloak-and-dagger meeting every week, when the most beautiful person you’d ever laid eyes upon would give you hours of his time and company and make you feel like…someone else. Someone more. The version of yourself who laughed and kissed and explored. Who had begun to crave.

You were starting to think the newer version of yourself was the better one. And with every moment Azriel wasn’t here, you were starting to miss him more and more.

Particularly right now, with your father and his cadre home from this week’s campaign. The taproom was full of their booming voices and their arrogantly loud laughter. All you could do was stand behind the bar and watch as they riled each other with tales of the fae and fantasised about retaliation, revenge. It was all they seemed able to talk about.

It bothered you in a way it never had before.

Perhaps because you knew of at least one good fae. Or perhaps because you still hadn’t told Azriel that the human rebellion he’d been made aware of was lead by your father. That he and his men discussed their strategy, their plans, in the very building that you spent such idyllic time with Azriel in every week.

Two versions of yourself, indeed.

Even Devin was here. It seemed he’d finally been swayed to join your father’s cause. A guard-in-training turned rebel. You’d have to be careful about the eye he so often had on you.

Heaving a soft sigh, you spared a glance at the clock. It didn’t seem that any of your father’s group had plans to leave any time soon. Still filthy from days on the road, they seemed content to make use of the bar rather than to return to their respective homes. You just wanted to go to bed. To lay staring at the ceiling and wonder what your winged…friend was doing at the exact same moment.

“Loud, aren’t they?”

Your gaze crept over to Devin, where he took up his usual seat at the bar. He shot you a winning smile that you knew would make every girl in the village swoon.

And yet…where your stomach would usually erupt with butterflies, you felt…nothing.

He was handsome, there was no doubt. But that charm paled in comparison to Azriel’s beauty.

“Just a bit,” you agreed, your eyes flickering to the gathering of unwashed, rowdy men at the centre table. “I don’t know how they don’t tire of having the same conversation over and over.”

Devin cocked an eyebrow. “Well, now, they’re just passionate about the cause. Aren’t you? Surely your father has spoken to you about it at length.”

He had — for the entirety of your life. You knew the cause inside out.

You just weren’t sure it was entirely right anymore.

“Of course he has,” you replied. “I support my father wholeheartedly. Sometimes I just wonder…”

Your words trailed off. This was tricky territory. You couldn’t go around sharing your thoughts just because Azriel was…different.

But Devin leaned forward encouragingly. “Wonder what?”

You studied him. Would it be so wrong, to suggest that good, honest fae were out there? It didn’t wipe away the atrocities that had been committed, of course, but to have an open mind wasn’t a bad thing.

And certainly not for a village guard, either. To be broad-minded, sometimes merciful.

“I just wonder if there’s good and bad in everyone,” you relented a little too quickly. It surprised you…how much you wanted to talk about it, make your point. “There are good and bad humans. Who’s to say that such isn’t the case with the fae? And if it is…should the good fae be punished for what the bad ones have done? It seems—”

“The fae are evil, Y/N,” Devin cut in, his eyes fierce. “Make no mistake about that. It’s not the same with them because they’re made differently to us. They lack what makes us good and moral. They lack compassion and care. They’re self-serving and violent to their very core, and this world cannot be improved upon until every last fae is wiped off the map.”

You blinked, taking a subtle step back. The speech seemed…extreme. You’d never seen Devin quite so aggressive. And it seemed to take a moment for him to snap out of it — to relax the hard set of his jaw, the firm grip on his glass.

His eyes shuttered, and he swallowed hard. “I’m sorry,” he murmured. “I didn’t mean to frighten you, I just…I’ve seen for myself what the scum across the wall are capable of. The bodies of the village girls that were killed…it’s not an image I’m likely to ever forget.”

You studied him cautiously. “I imagine not.”

“I’d hate for you to meet the same fate, Y/N. These are dangerous times, and that filth are only growing bolder. It’s why I chose to join your father’s cause. Why I know that what he says is right.”

Such sure venom in his tone. And yet you knew…you knew that Azriel would never do anything like that.

The entire conversation made you feel sick.

But Devin clearly misread that as fear. Worry. “Get yourself to bed,” he said softly. “These idiots aren’t going anywhere any time soon. I’m sure I can pour a few drinks.”

Bed sounded like a good idea. Bed was safe. A place to think clearly.

You nodded, wiping your hands on a nearby cloth. It was all you could do to murmur a gravelly, “Thank you.”

Devin inclined his head. “Sleep well. And try not to worry,” a soft smile played on his lips. “You’re safe with us.”

You couldn’t muster a response.

But as you made it out of the stuffy taproom and headed for the stairs, you weren’t at all sure, anymore, where exactly safety lay.

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“I changed the barrels.”

“Good.”

“And mopped the floors.”

“Good.”

The next morning, you eyed your father as he took his breakfast at one of the taproom tables. He was in an even stranger mood than usual. Even more…pensive. Quiet.

You cleared your throat, gathering his empty cup and plate onto a tray. His dark eyes watched every one of your movements.

“I’ll get these cleaned up,” you said. “And then if there’s nothing else to be done, I thought I might—”

“Don’t worry about that for a moment,” he jerked his head at the tray in your hands. “Come take a seat.”

You paused. Couldn’t remember the last time he’d asked you to sit with him.

“I want to talk to you,” he pushed. “Sit.”

As you dumped the tray on another table and pulled out the chair opposite his, a bleating panic began to scream inside your head. Had your father somehow found out about Azriel? If he had, you didn’t want to imagine what kind of punishment that would warrant—

“Devin spoke to me before he left last night.” His voice was almost too quiet. “About you.”

You swallowed a lump in your throat. “What about me?”

“He seemed concerned about you. That you don’t truly appreciate the danger that is out there. Do you?”

Fuck. You really shouldn’t have said anything to Devin. Should have known that he’d report back to your father.

“Of course I do,” you answered. And you did know what danger was out there. Your dead mother was a fine enough example.

You just…didn’t think that had to mean that the entire fae species was bad. You didn’t want it to mean that.

“Then what’s all this nonsense about wondering if there are good fae?” your father pursed his lips. “Surely you know better than anybody that there aren’t. You’re without a mother because there aren’t.”

Your body had entirely locked up in the chair. It wasn’t exactly that you were scared of your father; you didn’t think he’d ever hurt you.

But he’d spent years behind this cause, and was closer than ever to it coming to something. This was his purpose, his passion, the thing he cared about perhaps more than anything else in the world, you included. To debate him on it…to question it…it was the worst thing you could possibly do.

You forced yourself to shrug, to look meek and clueless. “I just…asked Devin a question, that’s all,” you answered. “Sometimes I think I could know more. You could tell me more.”

It seemed so long that your father spent studying you. And as he did, you made yourself the version of you that he knew. The picture of innocence. Nothing but mild curiosity.

And then, finally, his body relaxed. He gave a slow nod. “I know you think I keep you in the dark sometimes,” he admitted. “In truth, I have. To some degree. I wanted you to have some semblance of peace and safety in this world, if only a little. But perhaps I’m doing you more harm than good.”

“I—”

“After Devin spoke to me last night, I got thinking. And I made a decision.”

You stared back at him, trying desperately not to clench your fists at your sides. Something about the resolve on his face made your stomach turn.

“What’s the decision?” you asked.

“Next week — I’ve decided I’m taking you out on the road with us. You can get a proper idea of what all of this is about. Perhaps I should have taken you with us before.”

You stared at him, lips parted, not entirely sure he couldn’t hear the shrieking that rang in your ears.

His time on the road was the precious little time you got to have with Azriel every week. What you looked forward to every week. To miss that—

And to miss it to join your father’s campaign…you were sure the colour must have drained from your face. It was bad enough that you hadn’t told Azriel that your father was the driving force behind this human rebellion. If he were to find out you’d actively participated in it…

Well, he’d surely want nothing more to do with you. The thought alone made your heart plummet into your stomach.

“I can’t go with you,” you blurted, and your father’s brow pinched. “I mean…what about this place?” you gestured to your surroundings. “No one would be here to keep the inn open.”

His shoulders relaxed, and there was even a hint of a smile on his face. “I can find someone to hold the fort for a few days, don’t you worry about that,” he reached out, mussing the hair on your head. “You’re a good girl, Y/N. But this trip is necessary. It’s time you understand what we’re up against.”

He stood from his chair, and you could do nothing but watch. There was no arguing with him. His mind was made up.

“It’s decided — you’re coming on the road with us next week,” he turned, and he didn’t look back at you as he said, filing through the door, “make sure you’re fully prepared.”

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soaringwide · 25 days

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Pick a Card: You vs Them - Love Connection Check-in

Hello and welcome to another love reading pick a card.

This is a pretty classic, you vs them romantic connection check-in, where we'll look first at both of you currently are, your respective thoughts feelings and actions you are taking, as well as the connecting dynamic between the two of you.

This pick a card reading is meant for any type of romantic connection, whether it's a crush situation or a more established connection.

Like my style and want to book a paid reading with me? Check out this post or my pinned post :) You can book through DMs or ko-fi.

PILE 1

You

Cards: 6 of Swords, the Tower, the Warrior of Love, Jealousy, Strength, Knight of Swords, 3 of Pentacles

You are currently experiencing quite the conflict. It seems you are not satisfied with your love life in general, but also with the state of this connection. This is triggering heavy feelings and even making you experience a personal crisis. You feel doomed in regards to love and this connection, like nothing ever works and that it might not be in the cards for you. That you spent all that time loving them for nothing. As a result, you are feeling jealous, either of other people's love or of the potential of your person being with someone else. You are also wondering if you should cut your losses and let go of this connection to look for something better. This is adding to the inner crisis you are experiencing because its like your logic is telling you to let go to avoid being hurt further, but your heart does not want to. Like at all. It's like in the inside you're determined to see this through and try everything you can until you are 100% sure this relationship is dead and buried. There is a very combative vibe to this ad in you do not want to give up and you're ready to take risks. You go back and forth between being determined and wanting a way out.

Your thoughts towards them is again some type of combative mind game. It's like you are very observant of your own thoughts and try to keep them under control, both to avoid being unrealistic about what's happening, and also to avoid falling into despair. You're trying to keep the balance and be strong in this situation. You may also be trying to temper your emotions with your mind as a way to avoid doing something you think you might regret. Overall you are very active in your mind and have some type of iron grip over this.

Your feelings regarding them explain why you feel this need for control, as it seems you feel some type of emergency, that you are extremely scared that this is going to slip away if you don't act and that you need to find a way to either make it work or exit fast. This is making you feel restless and anxious.

Your actions are also kept under control by your thoughts as I see you talking to them and building a foundational friendship, hiding everything. Collaboration or work might also be important to some of you. So yeah your actions are not romantic at all and seem to be calculated and carefully paced. Which contradicts totally with your feelings, which you seem to hide very well.

Them

Cards: 9 of Swords, 4 of Cups, at Peace, Judgement, the Sweetest Taboo, the Fool, 4 of Swords, the Hanged Man rx, Queen of Pentacles

On their side of things, I'm getting that your person is involved with someone else, and they are toying with the idea of you, the card the sweetest taboo is quite telling. They may be daydreaming about you and imagining what it would be like to let themselves have this, but in reality, they are not acting on it, and it remains a fantasy. They are simply remaining quite apathetic, withdrawn, and not taking any steps towards you. They might go hot and cold quite often with you. They seem to be keeping this mask if calmness that is a front because the 9 of swords tells me the situation distresses them quite a lot, even if only when they stop distracting themselves and think about it. They are definitely thinking about this a lot. Judgement also tells me they are well aware that their actions will have consequences, whatever they decide to do about this, and they are taking it very seriously.

Their thoughts on the matter is that while again they seem to be toying with the idea of a new beginning and taking a risk with you, they are also playing dead, so to speak. It's possible that they have recently withdrawn compared to what they used to do. Its like they think about going for this carelessly, but they also feel the need to think about this deeply and carefully. The thought it there but they haven't made up their mind and right now they are just withdrawing and thinking about what they could do.

This is reflected in their feelings. With the Hanged Man reversed they are taking this sweet time to think about this, feelings very indecisive and not ready to make a choice. They are still considering the different paths they could take, whether with you or not, and are also considering their feelings quite a lot.

Their actions towards you seem to be focused towards being friendly and showing they care for you on a personal level. They may be giving you advice or paying attention and remembering what you said. They are super careful about keeping the relationship stable and well meaning, and just like you are doing they are hiding they inner state pretty well. Again might be a co-worker or a friend, again not showing super romantic actions towards you but keeping things harmonious between the two of you.

Connecting dynamic

Cards: 7 of Pentacles, the Empress, a Loving Gaze, Soft Whispers, Inner Awareness, Wishes Fulfilled, Optimism

Despite the lack of romantic actions on both sides, I'm getting that gazes seem to be a pretty important way for the both of you to communicate. It seems that a lot of things remain unsaid, but a lot is communicated through the eyes.

I'm also getting that the way you talk to each other in the tone you take is quite important in this dynamic. You might be talking about mundane things but you communicate your feelings through the way you both speak, keeping things sweet, lighthearted and friendly. So yeah again everyone avoids the important issue here but you try you best to be perceived in a good light.

This is represented further by the Empress, both of you want to look, smell and act your best, trying to attract the other in a magnetic way rather than through direct flirting. Again the idea of keeping things amicable shows up and you both seem quite interested in building things slowly and carefully, observing intensely how things are unfolding.

The cards also shows quite a lot of optimism connecting the both of you, showing that despite the inner conflicts and indecision, you both still have hope for this, even if it seems quite far away. You are both wishing for each other and for the situation to magically fix itself, like with some grand intervention of fate that would unite you.

You are also both trying to stay aware of yourself and control what you are doing while not being super aware of what's happening on the inside for the other. It's also like you're trying to both deal with your own shit first, keeping you quite blind on the situation and self-centered.

PILE 2

You

Cards: King of Pentacles, 5 of Pentacles, Physical Attraction, Longing and Desire, Optimism rx, the Lovers, Temperance rx, Queen of Wands, 6 of Pentacles

It seems you went through a breakup with your person and you're left feeling like you have nothing left, completely trapped in pessimistic feelings about having lost the relationship and thinking it will never be gained back. However, you still hold deep feelings and desire for them. You are very protective of the idea of this relationship and this person and you can't let it go. This person still lights your fire up and you think about them longingly, with intense sexual attraction. You keep imagining what it would be like to get back together with them and what to do to win them back.

So it makes sense that you got the Lovers as the card defining your thoughts. You keep thinking about your past relationship and being able to come into union with them again. You are dead set on fixing things up and bring harmony, even of you don't really believe it will happen.

For your feelings, with Temperance reversed, again, you have trouble letting go of this and healing, and you are neglecting your own emotional needs here. You feel like they are the missing piece to fix you instead of looking within to see what you could to do heal your heart and move on.

The actions you take show me that as a result of feeling like there is nothing left, you keep on trying to give and reach out, even if you don't get anything in return. You feel insecure and you're trying to get a hold of that by not letting yourself go and trying to do whatever you can to make things happen.

Them

Cards: 5 of Swords, 4 of Wands, Anger, à Loving Gaze, the Lady who Waits, 7 of Cups, 6 of Cups, Wheel of Fortune, the Hermit, Knight of Swords, the Hanged Man, King of cups

The breakup wasn't easy on them either even though it seems they triggered it, as there is evidence of a battle that ended and losses were made on both sides. However there is an idea of celebration and getting back together with friends and enjoying time with them, so it seems they needed that even if it's really hard on you. So they might be spending time with friends, partying and getting their life moving again.

It seems they are still quite angry at the situation though and have a lot of resentment for you. They have definitely moved on and left behind what they had with you. They are currently contemplating their options moving forward, looking to open up to new connections and waiting for the right opportunity. They are wondering where life will take them next and everything seems rather hazy and not grounded in anything yet.

For their thoughts, it seems they are embracing the change and again let go of what once was. The wheel as turned and a new chapter has opened. They seem to think this was bound to happen, whether they believe in fate or not, they think there was no other option here and that it was meant to happen at some point.

For their feelings, they definitely are very focused on themselves and are more focused on how you make them feel than how you feel. They are withdrawing and we already saw they are not giving anything to you anymore. They are focused on what this whole experience has taught them and doing some soul searching.

Which shows in their actions as well, withdrawal and contemplation while trying to remain calm and emotionally stable by distancing themselves. Their own emotional balance is very important to them and they are very protective of that. They do whatever needs to be done to keep the upper hand and stay in control of the situation. They might lash out or behave harshly as a result of you pushing against them.

Connecting dynamic

Cards: 3 of Swords, Knight of Wands, the Warrior of Love, Unrequited Desire, Reflection rx, Shadow Work

The main thing I get is that emotions are running high. You've got passionate longing for you and anger for them, which connects in intense headache, sorrow, fresh wounds from the past. It seems you are both triggering each other, bringing out the worst both of you have to offer. It's definitely a toxic situation, not necessarily because you are toxic individuals, but because the dynamic has turned sour and feelings are too high to behave differently.

There is also some type of chase going on like you are still hung up on them but they aren't reciprocating but you feel like they aren't closing the door properly, which is delicate and is quite complicated in reality. They might act like that as a reaction more than a real desire. Which again is triggering the worst of both of you and making a messy and painful situation on each sides.

You also can't seem to understand the each other's perspective because everything looks distorted by your own thoughts and emotions, like you're looking in a broken mirror.

PILE 3

You

Cards: 7 of Pentacles rx, Queen of Wands, Reflection, Jealousy and Possessiveness, King of Wands, 10 of Pentacles, Queen of Cups

Currently, you're feeling quite frustrated by the pace of things in this connection, feeling like you've invested a lot of time and effort in this and not gotten the reward you were expecting. You have expectations regarding what your person should give you, and you're eagerly waiting for them to meet them. You know your worth and feel quite annoyed because you feel you should be getting more from this whole thing. This is pushing you to weigh things out and reflect on the dynamic of the relationship, and you're actively seeking advice about it, to the point of being quite obsessive and overthinking it. You feel quite jealous and possessive of your person, and you feel like they should be yours and yours only.

In your mind, you are very clear about what you want from this relationship, and you keep thinking of a long-term future with them. There is no hesitation on your mind. You have a vision and you feel like there is real potential for success here.

This is reflected in your feelings. You feel at home with this person and have a deep desire to build something solid and committed that could lead to building a life together.

For your actions, though, it seems you are not showing your cards fully, keeping them close to your chest. Your feelings run deep, and you seem to be spending a lot of time in them without necessarily acting on them, and definitely not communicating them to your person. It's like you're facing away from them, refusing to show your depth of emotions.

Them

Cards: King of Pentacles, 10 of Wands, love's embrace, stress, Jealousy, the Tower, 3 of Pentacles, Page of Cups, King of Cups, Wheel of Fortune

On their side of things, they seem to be quite overwhelmed by the situation, to the point of feeling burdened by stress. On their side of things, the situation seems a bit "stuffy" or "suffocating" and they have a thousand things they need to do which adds up to the stress. It's like, they are not used to this game of love and feel quite a bit out of their depth here. They are definitely not at ease with the attention and it may be a distraction from their work and they have trouble balancing that. They are also mirroring you on the Jealousy aspect as they seem to worry you might have other suitors more fitting for you.

This is reflecting in their current thoughts, which shows that they are at a breaking point. Their whole world is being turned upside down, and they feel pushed towards a transformation they don't think they are ready for. This might feel like something they didn't ask for is happening to them, and they don't think they have any control over this.

For their feelings, they again seem to mirror you in their desire to build a foundation for the both of you, although they seem less long term oriented than you and more focused on the task at hand. Perhaps getting to know you or building positive exchanges. They do feel the massive amount of work that it requires though and they might feel the need to reach out to others to help them in their task and give them advice.

For their actions, they appear like a shy, not super confident or particularly determined suitor, testing the water and making careful moves. They do want to show you that they are reliable and full of desire to provide for you, but they are not exactly showing that very well. Its also like they are waiting for a change coming from the outside to solve the situation, perhaps the intervention of someone else or a big fated event, which may make their actions appear quite erratic and random, because they lack the drive and focus.

Connecting dynamic

Cards: 10 of Swords, Ace of Pentacles, Page of Swords, Standing Alone, Seeking Pleasure, Doubt and Indecision, Sweet Surrender, 8 of Wands, Worry

So you both feel like you've reached some type of low here, as if you could not get any lower. Its a bit dramatic because the cards are also showing the a new start here. Perhaps things had indeed ended here but they are picking up again, and fast. However you both are quite defensive and on your guards regarding this new beginning and are being quite suspicious about it, wondering if you can really trust it or not. It seems that during that time where things where low, you both had to stand on your own and learn to care for yourselves, building and healing you own issue.

However there might be some reluctance to leave this state, because it asks to be vulnerable with the other and neither of you seem totally ready to do that. This is leading to doubts regarding this relationship, wondering if it is indeed the right path for both of you. However, the promise of love and pleasure comes out very strong and I think it has been building for a while without finding a release. You both seem to desire and dread this equally. The whole situation is making you both quite worried and disoriented and there is a need to communicate things in a straightforward way.

#pick a card #tarot reading #pick a pile #PAC reading #pick an image #pick a card reading #pac tarot #pick a picture #pick a photo #divination #soaringwide tarot reading #soaringwide #tarot #tarotblr #tarot community

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partially-controlled-chaos · 2 months

Text

Indulgence

Pairing: Halsin x GN!Reader

Rating: T

Warnings: No spicy moments, but implied horny Halsin.

Summary: Halsin has always struggled with indulging in the more pleasurable aspects of life. However, with the shadow curse lifted and your group now on the road to Baldur's Gate, you and Halsin find time to indulge in a bit of fun and a sweet treat before retiring for the evening.

Word Count: 9.3K

an: It took me too many weeks, but I finally have the fully fleshed out story related to this poll and this little WIP! As it stands, I only have plans for this to be a oneshot, but considering I went back and forth far too many times on if I wanted to add a spicy scene to this, I might write a quick spicy follow up to this if I can find the courage to actually post something smutty.

Read on AO3 here if you prefer!

Edit: I decided to write a spicy update for this and you can read it here.

Masterlist

The night air was pleasantly warm against your skin as you stepped from the confines of your tent. You stretched your arms above your head, thoroughly exhausted from the traveling the day brought, and you wanted nothing more than to slip into your bedroll and sleep away the stiffness in your body. But a light rumble to your stomach and a tingle on the tip of your tongue for something sweet kept you awake. Your camp was mostly quiet as you strolled across the grounds from your tent to pillage through the crates of supplies, save for the sound of githyanki longsword grinding against a sharpening stone and the playful barks and hoots of your furred companions. Most of your companions had retired for the evening, either by going to their own bedrolls or simply sitting in the mouth of their respective tents and unwinding from the day. The walk from the now former shadow lands had been quite the journey, taking a handful of days to get to where you were now, and still had another day or two of walking ahead of you before you reached the town of Rivington just outside of Baldur’s Gate.

You strolled along the supply crates along the edge of camp, peeking through your rations to find something to satiate your sweet cravings. The crates were filled with plenty of cured meats and cheeses with handfuls of fresh vegetables scattered about, but not the first pastry or bit of chocolate in sight. You grumbled to yourself as you continued rummaging, but you eventually found the small jar of honey you had collated a few days prior. Your skin tingled at the memory of the few dozen bee stings you’d received as punishment for cutting away a chunk of the honeycomb, but for now it was more than worth the trouble. You slowly poured part of the jar into an empty bowl, watching as the sweet, thick substance flowed from the mouth of the jar. By the time you’d coated the bottom of your bowl, you rotated the jar just a bit to stop the stream and wiped the rim with your finger.

You popped your forefinger into your mouth and cleaned off the bit of honey that lingered, humming in satisfaction at the first taste of the fresh honey. After the lid had been secured, you slotted the jar back in its spot and continued your search for your late night craving. You would need something of substance to eat with the honey to satisfying the gnawing in your stomach and you finally settled on two tart apples. You plucked a clean paring knife from the camp cook station and added it to your small stash of goods.

As you turned from the supply boxes to return yourself to your tent for the evening, you spotted Halsin sitting alone by the dying fire, quietly thumbing through a rather large book. He always made it a habit of sitting off to the side or just in the mouth of his tent, forever reluctant to join the rest of the group when it came time to relax. So, by sitting at the campfire, you couldn’t help but wonder if he would mind a bit of conversation before bed. But, then again, you weren’t sure. Halsin had always claimed that duty and responsibility kept him from truly enjoying down time; feeling that he should be out doing something about the issues at hand instead of sitting idly by. Ever since you plucked the bear from the clutches of the goblins, you can’t recall hardly ever seeing him actually relax or indulge in anything remotely pleasurable. With this in mind, you didn’t want to disturb the few moments of peace and self indulgence he allowed himself by disturbing him.

The stress of the grove weighed heavily on his shoulders, but not long after he left the grove to join your group you had started to see his stoic demeanor begin to bend ever so slightly. Of course the little bit of reprieve he had was short lived once you finally made it to the shadow cursed lands. His duty and sense of responsibility while there was heightened beyond belief and you couldn’t pry him from lifting the curse if you wanted to. So, the look of absolute joy and relief on his face once the curse had finally lifted was certainly a sight for your eyes. He actually seemed happy.

Halsin was reclined by the fire with his legs stretched out in front of him and an elbow supported on an old log behind him. A heavy book resting in his lap, the thumb of his free hand lightly ran along the corners of the pages repeatedly as he read. You caught yourself staring as he flipped to the next page and used his fingers to smooth out the pages before returning them to their ministrations of the corners. You still wrestled with yourself on if you should approach him or not, truly not wanting to bother him, but also not wanting him to feel left our from the group. Eventually, you found yourself walking towards the druid and stopped a few steps from where he was seated.

“Care for some company?” You asked as you approached with your bowl of treats in hand. Halsin looked up from his book, greeting you with his usual, gentle smile.

“Always.” He extended his hand to offer you the seat beside him, softly patting the ground. You carefully stepped over his legs as you made your way to the spot offered to you. You sat on the ground beside him, your lower back resting against the log. You crossed your legs in front of you, placing your bowl in the space between your thighs, giving yourself a suitable spot to rest for the evening until you retired back to your tent. Your leg lightly brushed against Halsin’s thigh as they crossed and you felt him shift slightly, clearing his throat as he adjusted.

“Good evening, my friend.” He said as he adjusted the opened book in his lap, his hand rested atop the pages, securely keeping the book against his thighs.

“Good evening.” You said as you gave a final wiggle to your hips so you could fully settle, “Care to indulge?” You offered him one of the two apples you had brought with you. He graciously accepted the piece of fruit, sinking his teeth into the flesh with a satisfied crunch as you showed him the bowl of honey.

“Do you want some? I know they’re not the sweetest of apples.” He shook his head as he chewed his bit of apple, holding his hand up to stop you from pressing the bowl closer to him.

“No, thank you, though,” he said after he had swallowed, “I certainly pulled enough bee stingers from you the other night that you’ve earned it all for yourself.” He gave a slight chuckle and a gentle nudge to your elbow.

“It was worth it.” You said sheepishly as you recalled having to ask Halsin for help with healing the welts and pulling the stingers from you that you had difficulty in dislodging.

The two of you sat in a comfortable silence, simply enjoying the serenity of the evening in each others company. Halsin turned his attention back to his book as he continued to bite away at his apple and you focused on cutting yours into slices. You took the paring knife you’d brought with you and used it to cut the apple in half, making it easier to cut away at the flesh. With each piece you took off, you dropped them back into the bowl and tossed any bits of seeds or core into the fire ahead of you.

“You don’t have to sit by yourself, you know.” You said as you sliced off another chunk of apple, “I mean if you want to that’s fine, of course, but you don’t have to. You’re as much a part of this group as anyone else.” You glanced to him as you spoke, having finished your slicing and placed the knife on the ground beside you.

“I thank you for the sentiment, but truthfully I don’t feel like that’s the case.” Halsin looked up from his book once again, meeting your gaze in a way that made your skin tingle.

“Why not?” You asked as your brows knitted together, “Has someone said something?”

“Not at all,” he said calmly, “but you know as well I that I haven’t exactly been present for the more…bonding moments that others have enjoyed. I seem to have made myself an outsider. Aside from your company, of course. You’ve always gone out of your way and for that I thank you.” His voice was genuine as he spoke, which relieved any worry that there was trouble among camp members.

“Ah, well, I guess that means you’re stuck with me around the campfire from now on.” You leaned over slightly and nudged him with your shoulder as he chuckled at your response.

“You will always be most welcome.” With a final bite he finished off his apple, tossing the core into the fire ahead of him before returning back to his previous position. He reclined against the log once again, putting his weight against one arm on the log and the other returning to rest along the book spread across his lap, his fingers absentmindedly running along the lip of the cover.

You were blissfully unaware of the hungry eyes watching your every move as you indulged in your sweet treat. Halsin’s gaze was transfixed on the movements of your wonderfully nimble fingers as you selected a slice of tart apple from your bowl and coated it with a generous amount of the honey you’d procured earlier in the day. You twirled the slice in your fingers, trying to break the sticky strings that came as you tried to scoop the thickened treat onto the fruit. Halsin was unsure if time had slowed or if it was simply his own desires fogging his mind, but watching this relatively mundane task had become almost intoxicating.

Your attention was quickly pulled from your snack before you had a chance to bite into it, the call of your name from across camp making you pause. You still held the slice in your fingers, hovering over the bowl as you spoke to your companion about an event from earlier in the day. The honey that rested at the tip of the apple slice began to drip, slowly making its way along the fruit and onto your thumb. Halsin was sitting close enough that he could smell the sweetness and the light floral notes that came from the honey, the scent alone being enough to have his mouth watering for a taste. Although he couldn’t help but wonder at how the taste would change when mixed with the taste of your skin as he watched the honey continue to drop down the length of your arm.

He had longed for your touch for some time now, but ever since the group had parted the shadow lands, the longing had become incessant. Unbeknownst to you, Halsin wanted more from you; more than just friendship. He wanted companionship. He wanted you. And in this moment he wanted nothing more than to clean the honey from your skin with his own tongue and kiss your dexterous fingers that had been teasing him all day. The impulsive urge to act on the idea was tempting, but given that he had yet to approach you about wanting more, he tried to push the thought from his mind.

Realizing the sticky mess that was now running down your arm, you quickly popped the apple slice covered in what remaining honey that wasn’t dripping down your arm into your mouth. You searched the small area by the campfire for any sort of cloth to wipe your hands on, but ultimately decided to simply lick it off when you couldn’t find a suitable rag and the sticky honey was now nearing your elbow. With a turn of your head and twist of your arm, you found the large drip of honey on your arm and pressed your tongue along the sweet trail. Starting near your elbow, you slowly pulled your tongue along your inner forearm, collecting the fallen honey in the small well created by your tongue. Given just how sticky the honey was, you found yourself going over the same spots multiple times in an attempt to get every drop that had made its way down your arm.

Halsin could feel his heart pick up speed and almost threaten to beat out of his chest the more he watched you clean yourself of the honey and the grip on the book in his lap tightened with each swipe of your tongue. The tips of his pointed ears had grown warm in a flush and his throat had suddenly gone dry. Despite the growing tension and the tightening of desire growing in his muscles, he found himself simply unable to look away from you. It had been so long that he’d been able to indulge in desires of his own that he had become complacent with pushing away his wants until he had completed his duties. But now those duties had been fulfilled, with your help of course, he was now free to purse any desires he’d denied himself for so long. And the druid was dangerously close to losing any and all control over keeping these wants at bay until the proper moment.

By the time you’d made your way to your honey coated thumb, you finally picked up on the eyes that had been focused on your movements for so long. Your own gaze flicked to Halsin, whose face was a mixture of amusement and something else you couldn’t quite place, and couldn’t help but smile in embarrassment as he’d caught your blunder. What you couldn’t notice, however, was the heat rising along Halsin’s neck and the thread of tension in his chest that was threatening to break at any second. However, when you stuck the entirety of your thumb into your mouth and slowly pulled off the honey while still holding his gaze, that delicately held together thread finally snapped.

Without a word, Halsin sharply shut his book, practically flinging it from his lap, letting it drop into the dirt as he abruptly stood. Your head tilted upwards, curiously watching as his frame loomed over yours as you remained seated against your log. His legs stepped over yours as he started to leave the campsite, stomping into the ground beside you. You watched as he made off for the inner depths of the trees, walking as fast as his legs would carry him. You had half a mind to follow him, now afraid that you had done or said something to offend him, or even anger him. However, your intentions to follow him into the woods were short lived when you were quickly bombarded with a snout and beak clambering over each other to have a bite of your apples and honey.

Halsin walked quickly into the expanse of the forest, easily slipping between trees and shrubs as he tried to make it as far away from camp, and your teasingly delightful movements, as he could. He could feel a deep rumble in his throat threaten to let loose and a flutter in his heart before it turned into a steady, yet quickened pace. The memory of you oh so deliciously cleaning up the honey from your fingers was burning hot in his mind, causing heat to course through his body and settle in other areas. But laced within this arousal was also an equal amount of anger for himself.

He wanted you more than anything he had wanted in so long that he wasn’t sure what to do with himself. He was elated and almost giddy whenever you graced him with your company, although he was usually good at keeping his demeanor calm and collected. A solemn, unwavering wall he had built to control his emotions and desires while still trying to work a way out to rid Thaniel’s realm of the curse while also not drowning in the stress and strain that the grove demanded for over a century was beginning to crumble, letting a playful youth and optimism begin to break through. The cracks in the wall were caused simply by you and your kindness, your generosity, and your unwavering determination to simply do the right thing for those in need; for those like himself. Halsin wanted to take things further with you, to see if there could be more than just a friendship and a battle alliance, but he was finding that he had issues in taking the next step.

He himself was always susceptible to holding off on acting on desires until more pressing, mature tasks like the shadow curse had been dealt with, finding that he couldn’t enjoy indulging in more carnal or whimsical pleasures until the work was over. He knew you were not like that, but he still felt the same guilt whenever he even considered approaching you for something more. The Absolute was now marching towards Baldur’s Gate with an army of enthralled and tadpole infected and the threat of the Elder Brain becoming in control was ever pressing. He simply couldn’t justify indulging in his own selfish wants and pleasures when something that important was a looming threat. Halsin could wait. He would wait. But that didn’t mean that his own feelings and desires weren’t too much to handle at times.

Halsin gritted his teeth as he walked, nose flaring in a snarl as the overwhelming heat that engulfed his body was becoming too much to control. He had gotten a decent ways away before he felt the urge become all consuming, stooping over in a hunch before erupting backwards in a flash of golden light and a burst of magic. A large cave bear landed on all fours, crushing the hard earth underneath heavy paws. The bear shook his shoulders, releasing a bit of tension before galloping deeper into the forest. Primal urges and instincts always seemed to win out in the end, no matter how hard Halsin tried to control them, and they wouldn’t be tamed easily.

It wasn’t long before the galloping bear eventually came to a stop, breathing heavily at the exertion and arousal still burning through his veins. A pristine, quiet pond stopped the bear in his tracks, a wonderfully calming spot deep in nature that could soothe and subdue the beast running rampant through the woods. Halsin took a deep breath, taking in the scent of the algae clinging to the edge of the pond and listening to the sounds nearby. Crickets chirped loudly all around, sounding off out of sync so there was almost always one singing into the night.

Beautifully luminescent fireflies lazily bobbed around the surface of the water and high into the trees, their glow mixing with the moon that was still high in the sky; well past midnight, but still a few hours before the sun would rise. The serenity of the pond was still not enough for Halsin to be able to regain control of the beast. He stepped into the water, feeling the icy cold water beginning to finally tame the fire almost boiling in his veins. Another step in and the beast was becoming easier to control, but still needed just a bit more.

You stepped quietly through the trees, effortlessly weaving your way through foliage and over gnarled tree roots poking up from the ground as you searched for the druid. A few hours had passed since his abrupt departure and with all of your companions now sleeping peacefully in their bedrolls, four footed ones included, with the exception of one particularly cryptic druid. Something about Halsin’s sudden urgency to leave didn’t sit well with you and after he had not yet returned, you were concerned. You knew good and well he was in no real danger and could easily handle himself, but you knew there was something gnawing at his mind and if it was something you could help alleviate, you were more than willing to miss out on a few hours sleep.

Realistically, you were walking blindly into the forest. You had no sense of where Halsin could have wandered off to and your tracking skills were less than ideal. But nonetheless you pushed forward, taking time to enjoy the silence of the night as you meandered your way through your surroundings. You didn’t bother to bring a torch given just how bright the moon was and only had to fumble a bit under the thickest spots of the canopy. After some time, you picked up on the steadily increasing sounds of crickets and stopped to marvel at the blanket of fireflies that thrived in the darkness.

Between the chirps of the cricket hiding in the grass, you heard the sound of something lightly splashing against water. You redirected your course to head towards the sound and soon stumbled upon a small pond. A symphony of croaking frogs began as you neared the water, surprised to see such a quaint little pond in such a thick forest. The splashing came again, this time the sound seemly skipping across the surface of the water, and as you reached the end of the trees, you could see the remaining ripples riding against the water.

Halsin was standing up to his shins in pond, his trousers rolled to just above his knees and his shoes had been long forgotten in the grass leading to the water, yet still mysteriously wet. His back was to you and he had yet to hear you approach, too engrossed in skipping stones across the water than to hear you coming up behind him. You could see the muscles of his arms flexing and releasing in the soft glow of the moonlight, an obvious tension in the thickness of the muscles. Something had set the druid on edge and you feared that you were the catalyst of his frustrations; although you had no inkling of a clue that you were also the solution.

You watched as he wound his arm slightly before flinging a stone from his hand. The rock skipped beautifully across the water, jumping ten times or more before finally sinking to the bottom of the pond. He waited for the water to quiet once again before throwing another stone, but his one much more forceful. Instead of skipping across the water, the rock simply splashed on impact and sunk. There was a frustration in his throw, a side you didn’t see from Halsin very often out of battle, but you still hadn’t determined the cause. You hesitated in your spot, thinking it would probably be best to simply turn away and let him work through his feelings in this state, but part of you wanted to stay. You’d helped him with many issues thus far, so why stop now?

You took another step towards the pond, purposefully stepping on a branch so it would snap and give away your position. Halsin’s head turned the trees, alarm quickly giving way to relief when you saw you stepping from the foliage. You noted how the scrunched expression on his face melted at the sight of you, making you believe that perhaps he wasn’t angry with you. He gave you a single nod as you approached the edge of the lake, his blood still running too warm for his liking and he wasn’t sure he could speak without a sense of desperation to his voice. You nodded in response, taking the opportunity of finding a body of water to rinse your hands.

“Is everything all right?” You asked as you knelt by the shoreline, dunking your hands in the cool water to wash away any sticky remnants of the honey you’d eaten earlier.

“Oh, yes I’m fine. Just needed some space to think.” Halsin said as he tossed another stone across the quiet surface of the water, “With the city drawing nearer, I fear a peaceful spot like this will be difficult to find. I wanted to savor it while it lasts; try to process recent events and what comes next.”

“Ah. Well… I won’t keep you then.” You said as you stood, flicking water droplets from your fingers in an attempt to dry them, “We both know peace rarely stays for long when I’m around.” You gave a half hearted smile, still unsure if you had done something to upset the druid. Your mind had been settled at the very least, knowing he was safe and had seemingly calmed himself enough to sate your troubled mind.

“Nonsense,” Halsin’s voice was almost surprised, “there is plenty of space in nature for the both of us. You are no bother to me, my friend.” You hesitated for a moment, but eventually spoke.

“You’re certain?” Halsin’s head cocked slightly, picking up on the uncertainty in your voice and realizing that his sudden departure might have offended you in some way.

“Will you join me?” He asked softly as he extended out his hand, offering you a rock to skip yourself.

You felt your heart begin to pick up pace at his offer, having very few times in memory where he’s specifically asked for your company. Normally you asked if he would mind if you joined or he would offer you a space next to him, but very rarely had he specifically asked you to join him. Because of this, you happily obliged and began unlacing your boots to join him in the water. Halsin could feel that familiar warmth beginning to creep into his chest again as he watched your ever teasing fingers quickly unlace your boots. He shifted in the water again, finding a colder spot to stand in as you rolled your trouser legs up to your knee before stepping into the water yourself.

“Good gods.” You muttered as you stepped further into the water, the sudden chill on your legs making your skin seize up and a chill go down your spine.

“Quite brisk tonight, despite how warm the air is.” Halsin said as you stood by him in the water, which had already soaked well past your knees given the depth of your section of pond. You nodded in agreement, still trying to adjust to the temperature change.

He offered you the stone again and you happily accepted it, your fingers brushing against his as you grabbed the stone. You did a double take and took his hand in both of yours, marveling at how unbelievably warm they were when considering he’d been standing in cold water for quite some time now.

“Do you always run so warm to the touch?” You asked as you finally pried your hands away from his, realizing just how long you had lingered.

“I have lately,” Halsin admitted as you turned the stone in your hand, “the beast tends to run hot and emerge more often when I have something pressing on my mind.” Halsin flicked his wrist and sent another stone skidding across the water, ending with a satisfying plunk as it dipped below the surface.

You were never sure why he always referred to his bear form as a beast. Sure, the bear was a formidable opponent in battle and could show quite the fury when angered, but ultimately the so-called beast was still Halsin. To you, the bear was as much Halsin as Halsin was the bear; one in the same. And admittedly, as much as you admired Halsin, you were also rather fond of the bear.

“Anything I can do to help ease your mind?” You asked softly, “I won’t pry, but if I can be of some use, please, let me know.”

“Some use?” Halsin asked through a hearty chuckle, “You’ve helped me more than I could have imagined. You’ve greatly exceeded any expectations I could have possibly had when I met you. I do hope you know just how grateful I am for you, my friend.” You found yourself blushing at his praises, a warmth stinging the apples of your cheeks.

“Well, how about more use, then?” You offered after your blush began to die down, still wanting to offer help for the druid if you could.

“I won’t burden you with an old druid’s ramblings.” He said softly, turning his gaze to yours, “You have your own matters to worry about that are much more important.”

“Well,” you sighed when you realized he would go no further, “if you need whatever worth my opinion has on a matter or even just an ear to vent to, I’m here.” Halsin nodded to you as a way of thanks, taking a brief moment to simply admire you before sending another stone across the water.

You both stood in your respective spots for a long while, taking turns to throw stones across the pond. The stones Halsin skipped were always fluid and elegant, easily surpassing a dozen or so skips before finishing off. Yours, on the other hand, were much more choppy. You didn’t think you’d managed to pass more than two skips and most of your stone ended up simply splashing in the water the second they left your fingers. You weren’t the most skilled stone skipper in Faerûn, but you were admittedly enjoying yourself.

“Are you competitive, Halsin?” You asked after a while, wanting to fill the silence between you and still try to find a way to lift his spirits. If you couldn’t help him with his burdens, then you’d at least like to let him enjoy the night.

“I can be,” he said with a playful glint to his eye, “when I have time to indulge in more light hearted activities. And with the right company, of course.” He motioned to you with his finger.

“Well, in that case, care to indulge me? How about a fresh jar of honey for the winner? Don’t think I didn’t see you eyeing it earlier.” You tossed the rock in your hand and caught it with a touch of flare. Halsin was thankful that the cool water he was standing in kept his heart from racing and his blood from once again running too hot. His eyes focused on the stone you twirled in your fingers as you awaited an answer, your digits once again testing the limits of his self control.

“I can’t say it’s not tempting,” he spoke slowly, trying to regain a steadiness to his voice, “but, given the circumstances, I’m not sure if indulging is the right thing to do. Not right now, at least. The threat of the Absolute takes priority, does it not?”

“It does, but there’s no harm in indulging in something you want, especially now.” You stopped twirling your stone, opting to simply look out across the water as you spoke, “ The Absolute will be there tomorrow just as it was there today. What happens in our downtime will happen if we’re abstaining from joyous things or giving in completely. So, my thinking at least, is let yourself indulge. The world could end in the morning, so I’m going to enjoy tonight while I still can.”

How Halsin wished he could simply take your view on the world. He couldn’t help but think of all the stress and strain that could have been avoided if he had simply taken one night off here and there to just live. The responsibilities the grove suddenly presented to him all those years ago when the shadow curse first took hold had locked his mind in a constant battle for balance. He always strove to find balance in the natural world, but never took the time to find balance within himself. Instead, he allowed himself to be burdened and live almost as a ghost of his former self for the better part of a century. Until he met you. You were the balance he so desperately craved and wanted.

“Are you always so convincing?” He asked after a moment with a soft grin, finally relenting and decided that tonight would simply be one of indulgence and a bit of fun.

“I have my moments.” You said with a shrug and a cheeky smile.

You each took a handful of smooth stones from under the water, taking time to find ones that were just the right size and weight for your little game. You had decided that the winner would be whoever could skip a stone the furthest across the surface of the water before you decided to head back to camp. The moon had started to lower, the darkness beginning to lighten ever so slightly, signaling that sunrise was merely an hour or two away.

You once again took turns tossing rocks across with water with very similar results. You clearly knew Halsin would win your little competition and while the more competitive side of you wanted to win, you were simply happy with watching Halsin actually enjoy himself. The feeling was only boosted by the idea that he was enjoying spending his very little free time with you of all people. The thought brought you back to the moment you had shared earlier in camp when he abruptly left, the feeling of guilt once again returning with the thought that you had annoyed him.

“I’m sorry if I disturbed you earlier,” you said as another one of your stones plunked into the water on the first toss, “I should have let you enjoy your evening in peace.”

“You didn’t disturb me,” he said almost immediately, “I always enjoy every moment of your company. It’s just that… long suppressed emotions are bubbling towards the surface. Left unchecked they’re liable to break the tension and I’ll lose any sense of self control.” He sent another rock across the water, this one a bit more forceful, and it skidded across the water to reach his highest number of skips yet.

“Well, sometimes it’s good to let those feelings out. Cry, scream at the sky, go on a rampage. Seems to help Karlach well enough.” You threw a rock and had to catch yourself before losing your footing and falling in the water, “Hells, if you want to go stomping around as a bear for a while if you think it’ll be of assistance, have at it. I’ll be here when you get back and maybe I’ll have figured out how to properly skip a damn stone by the time you return.” He chuckled at your response, truly appreciative of the admiration of the bear, but also at your very sorry attempts at throwing rocks.

“Widen your stance,” he said as he pointed to your legs, “it’ll give you more stability so you can focus on tossing the stone and not toppling into the water.” You adjusted your leg slightly, pulling one leg just a bit from the other before looking back to Halsin for approval. He simply shook his head and pointed to the side, hinting that you should adjust more. The same cycle repeated for a few rounds with the same result.

“May I?” Halsin said after a few tries and finally gestured to your leg, wanting permission to help you adjust your stance before touching you.

“Of course.” You said softly, finding your heart had begun to give the slightest flutter in your chest as Halsin trudged through the water to stand behind you.

You felt Halsin’s foot nudge yours from under the water, encouraging you to shift your legs further apart. You obliged, shifting your leg until you felt the druid stop his movements. Admittedly, you felt more secure in your posture as you dug your toes into the sandy bottom of the pond. Your breath involuntarily hitched as you felt a pair of large hands on your hips, pulling back slightly and encouraging you to angle one hip further back. As before, you complied. Taking one small step back with one foot until you were at a slight angle.

“Good,” Halsin said softly against your ear, “just like that.” He could feel his own chest begin to tighten as you melted under his touch.

With his own lips close to your ear, he could hear the skip to your breath and could see the prickling of your skin as his warm breath tickled your neck. When you angled your hips with Halsin’s movements, your upper back softly rested against Halsin’s broad chest, fitting together almost seamlessly. The warmth of his body so close to yours was a welcome reprieve from the cold water you’d been standing in and you had to resist the urge to lean back more than you already had. You could each feel the others heart beat begin to increase, the pounding steadily increasing the longer your touch lingered on the other.

You had the quick touch here and there in the past, whether it be through healing or exploring or even a quick pat on the back for moral support, but it had never been anything more. Nothing had ever lingered for more than a few fleeting seconds and none had ever set your heart ablaze like it was now. Although not inherently sexual, there was a sexual tension in the air around you. Your seemingly simple offer to skip stones had quickly turned into something much more intimate. And admittedly, you were beginning to think that maybe there was more to Halsin than to just be a traveling companion. Perhaps you wanted more.

Shamelessly, you had flirted with him many weeks ago with the tiefling celebration with the aid of half a bottle of a wine, and had very gently been turned down. As much as it had disappointed you at the time, you respected his decision. After all, you were little more than strangers at the time and Halsin had his own share of problems to deal with first. But, now that the shadow curse had been lifted and his duties at the grove were nonexistent now, then just maybe something could happen between the two of you.

“Now for the stone.” Halsin said after clearing the lump of excitement from his throat. He took the stone from your hand, turning it over in his hands to ensure it was the correct size and weight for skipping.

You watched as the stone moved through his fingers, noting just how small the stone looked in his hands when the same stone looked large when compared to yours. You had expected his calloused hands to be rough against your skin, but as his fingers brushed against yours, you noticed how exceedingly gentle they were. You had seen his very hands decimate enemies and battle and rip foes apart when in wild shape, but in this moment his hand cradled yours as if you’d break if he were any rougher.

“Curl these fingers into your palm,” Halsin’s voice brought you back from your thoughts, “and use them to hold the stone steady until you’re ready to throw.” Halsin’s opposite hand was cupping yours, gently pushing your last three fingers with his own so they would curl into themselves. With his hand on yours and the other still holding the stone, you found yourself engulfed between his arms, each of his resting on either side of you.

“Good. Now, use your thumb to hold the bottom of the stone and let it run along the length of your finger. Hook it at the tip.” Halsin effortlessly spread your thumb and pointer finger with his own, giving him the change to slot the skipping stone into your grasp.

Halsin hesitated for a moment, but his other hand eventually settled on your side, keeping your hips aligned with how they had been previously positioned. He felt your skin prickle at his touch, a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips as his heart thumped even harder against his chest. He had to step back just slightly to keep you from feeling the same warmth he felt begin to grow in other areas of his body.

“Arm back.” He said as he pulled your arm back at a bend. You allowed him to move your arm as needed until your arm was completely nestled against his. You could feel the tightness of his muscles as he moved his arm in tandem with yours and you could actually feel just how strong his hulking arms were.

“Now I throw?” You whispered, finding your voice difficult to get out.

“Yes, but there’s a trick,” Halsin’s voice was once again at your ear, his breath tickling the outer shell as he spoke, “you’ll throw outward, but angle it down just slightly. It allows for a slight spin on the stone when you flick it from your fingers and it’ll skip along nicely.”

With your hand in his, he adjusted the slant of your grip until it was perfect. He kept his grip on you as he helped you toss the stone, his body moving time with yours as he used his arm to guide your own. With a flick of his wrist, and subsequently yours, the rock was thrown perfectly from your grasp and quickly skipped across the water. You both watched in a bit of amazement as the stone surpassed two dozen skips before finally coming to a stop. It was the furthest a rock had been thrown that evening and you were suddenly faced with a dilemma.

“So,” you drawled out as Halsin’s grip remained on you, “who gets the credit for that throw?” The druid couldn’t help but chuckle at the question, not quite sure how to answer it himself. He then realized that he was still holding onto you as you stood in the water and he hesitantly broke away. His fingers lingered ever so slightly on your skin, relishing the contact he’d so greatly been craving.

“I supposed we could call it a tie,” he said eventually, “and we’ll just have to see who can break it.” You nodded in agreement, satisfied with his answer, and readied yourself to begin throwing more stones now that you’d had just an exhilarating lesson.

You and Halsin spent the next few moments searching the pond for more suitable stones, the bulk of the ones at your feet having already been tossed. With sloshing at your legs and dirt between your toes, you walked as best you could to a new spot, hunched over as you inspected the ground for smooth, rounded rocks. Very soon you were joined by Halsin, who had yet to find a good rock, and you both simply searched the pond in silence.

“You know, it’s nice to see you like this.” You said eventually, still having come up empty handed for a decent rock.

“Like what? Hunched over and looking for rocks in the middle of the night?” Halsin asked with a chuckle as he continued looking himself. You found yourself standing across from each other, bent over and faces close to the edge of the water, but also rather close to each other. Half a step forward and your nose would be bumping into his.

“No,” you said with a giggle, “relaxing and, dare I say, even happy. It’s a good look for you.” He glanced up to you, offering you a gentle smile.

“I have you to thank for that. You’ve helped me far more than you probably should have already. It’s not fair of me to always burden you with my troubles; they’re not your burdens to bear. Pardon the pun, if you will.” His familiar seriousness had returned to his voice as he spoke, but he was nothing but sincere.

“Well maybe not, but my tadpole problem isn’t yours either. It’s okay to rely on others when you need help, Halsin. I know that what you had as Archdruid forced you to bear your burdens alone, but you don’t need to anymore. You’ve got an entire camps worth of people that would do anything to help. And if all else fails then you’ll have me. Please know that my hand is extended if you need the help.” You instinctively reached forward, not realizing just what you were doing until your slightly cold fingers ran across his burning cheek. You were committed by that point and simply cupped his cheek for a moment to show your sincerity before dropping it back to the tops of your thighs.

“Another night, perhaps.” He finally said after a brief moment of silence, “For tonight I’m too occupied with besting you at a bit of stone skipping.”

“You seem rather confident.” You said with a huff, being met with a similarly wide grin from the druid.

“After as many stones that you simply threw into the water? I am rather confident.” You responded by playfully dipping your fingers in the water in front of you, bringing them up sharply to splash a small amount of the chilly water on Halsin’s face.

You had expected some sort of witty remark, but instead, you were met with a very large and very cold splash of water to your own face and chest. Halsin had used both his hands to deliver a rather large amount of pond water to you, easily soaking your already thin camp tunic. You stood up straight, the chill going straight to your spine and making your skin prickle once again at the sensation. Your rock skipping competition had now been forgotten and you were both now splashing each other back and forth in the pond. You circled each other, trying to evade the onslaught of water heading towards each of you. You would let out a shriek turned giggle each time you were doused with another handful of water, folding in on yourself momentarily until the initial shock wore off. Halsin was much more dignified when he was splashed by your much smaller handfuls of water, but was no doubt feeling just a chilled after some time.

You continued to circle each other, steadily splashing each other more and more quickly as the game progressed. That was, however, until you finally lost your footing on a smooth rock that you hadn’t seen earlier, and started falling backwards. Thanks to his reflexes, Halsin was able to realize that you were falling much faster than you were, and reached out to grab a hold of your arm in an attempt to keep you from fully submerging yourself in the water. His hold certainly helped you from fully dunking into the water, but you were too far gone for it to save you from getting wet, and you inadvertently pulled the druid down on top of you as you fell into the pond.

You let out a hiss through your teeth as your bottom collided with the rocks and dirt underneath you, cold water immediately soaking your shirt and wetting your entire back. Halsin had come close to falling on top of you, but thankfully caught himself on his hands and knees before colliding with you. What he couldn’t prevent, however, was where he landed. You soon realized that the druid was looming over you, one of his massive legs was sandwiched between yours and the other rested along your outer hip. His hands were near your sides, not quite close enough to touch, but enough to fully cage you underneath him as your nose sat mere inches from his. You both simply froze in your spots, realizing the precariousness of your situation, yet somehow enraptured by it.

You could feel Halsin’s warm breath come out in strong bursts against your face, faintly smelling of the apple he had eaten earlier. Your eyes locked to his, unsure of what to do or say in the moment, and you were hoping he would be the more reasonable of the two. However, you were simply met with a tension filled silence, the druid also not sure of what to do or say next. His eyes slowly trailed down from yours, eventually settling along your lips. You let out the slightest of gasps as you felt his hand cup your cheek, much like yours had done to his just moments before, and you felt your heart pound harder than you could image as his thumb made its way down your cheek bone. You were fully expecting his lips to press to your own moments later, but instead you were surprised with a different move.

Halsin slowly ran his thumb across your bottom lip, starting at the corner of your mouth and gently pulling until he came to the center, your lip bending to his movements as he went. When his thumb left your skin after what felt like an eternity, he lifted the digit to your line of sight and revealed a small amount of honey. Your tongue instinctively licked your lip where his thumb had just been, searching for any remaining bit that had apparently been stuck to your mouth all evening. Before you could thank him for removing the sticky mess from your lip, he popped his honey covered thumb into his mouth, licking off the treat as his eyes remained locked onto yours.

You felt your heart pound against your chest and in your ears as you watched him lick off the teasingly small taste of honey from his thumb. There was something fiery in his eyes as he meticulously cleaned his thumb, something you had never seen so potent and strong before; desire. It only just dawned on you that your own honey licking earlier was what sent him into such a frenzy and caused his urgency to leave. Halsin wanted you and wanted you enough to drive himself mad with desire. Your breath suddenly came in pants as you felt a desirable warmth spread across your abdomen. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t want him just as desperately in this moment.

“There’s more,” you said breathlessly, “if you want.” Your voice was just a whisper against Halsin’s skin. You weren’t sure if the sudden lack of oxygen in your lungs was from the cool water now engulfing your chest or if it was from the sudden proximity of the druid hovering over you. You also weren’t sure yourself if you still only referring to honey.

“I do, more than anything, I do.” There was desperation in his words, but also a hint of hesitation in his voice as he spoke.

“But…?” You said after a moment, knowing there was more to his statement than just desire. Like that night at the tiefling party, you felt as if you were about to be gently turned down once again.

“But not tonight,” his gaze was soft as he spoke, understanding the delicate nature of the topic at hand, “the sun is rising and very soon our companions will stir for the day.”

Halsin wanted more than just a quick night to simply satiate primal needs. He wanted companionship from you, but wasn’t sure himself if you shared in his desires. He could tell you wanted at least one night with him, and until he was certain you also wanted more, he wanted to make the one guaranteed night to be memorable for himself at the least. Halsin needed an early evening and a long night so he could take his time to properly savor you; the taste of your lips, the feel of your skin against his, the scent of your arousal. He wanted to etch it all into memory.

If you didn’t want more time with him, he wanted to be able to remember your night together over and over again to satiate his own desires when alone in his tent. To recall the way your body moved and arched with his touch, to replay the wonderful little noises that would come from your lips when he found the right spot, and, most importantly, to reminisce about the way you felt around him. Your touch had teased him for so long now and he needed to feel you against every part of him more than he needed anything else. But, he needed a proper night. One where he could take his time with you without worry of being interrupted either by your camp mates or the rising sun.

Unfortunately, he wasn’t wrong. You also knew that if your companions noticed that you both were missing, they would surely coming looking for you and interrupt any bit of fun you and Halsin had decided to enjoy together.

“And,” he said as he brought his lips to your ear as he whispered, but not enough to touch, “if I’m going to indulge in something I’ve wanted for this long, I want to take the time to savor the taste.” You felt a shiver run down your spine at his words, the promise of something more to come in the following days was enough to subdue the raging warmth you felt in your abdomen and legs. You nodded in response and were greeted with a thankful smile.

You both remained there for a moment longer before the chill of the water was too much to bear. Halsin stood first, climbing off of your frame before helping you to your feet. You each wrung out as much water from your clothes and hair as possible before picking up your long forgotten shoes and making the long walk back to camp. You walked in silence as you returned to camp, your soaked clothes sloshing about filling the void of silence.

The sun was beginning to crest just as the crickets and fireflies had quieted down for the morning. Orange light filtered through the leaves of the canopy above as morning birds began their songs for the day, the rays of sun slightly warming your overly chilled bodies. By the time you made it just to the edge of camp, you were relieved to see that no one had yet stirred for the day. The last thing you wanted to do was explain why you and Halsin were returning to camp soaking wet after being gone for most of the night. Halsin stopped you before you could step into the camp, a soft touch lingering on your skin. You turned to face him, getting lost in the softness of his eyes as he spoke.

“Get what rest you can,” he whispered to you, “we’ll let ourselves indulge in the other after the sun sets for the day.” You smiled at the promise, already wishing for the day to go by as quickly as possible.

“Until tonight, then.” You said softly as you began to make your way towards your tent.

“Until tonight.” Halsin replied as he followed suit to his own living quarters.

You stepped quietly through the camp, hoping the sound of wet cloth rubbing against itself wouldn’t be enough to wake your companions, especially the camp animals. Halsin had made it to the mouth of his tent long before you’d made it to yours, considering yours was the furthest from the pond. You took a quick glance back towards his tent and found that he had not yet gone inside, but was waiting just in the threshold. He wanted to ensure you had gotten inside before he retired for a few moments rest himself. You met his gaze as you gripped the flap to your tent and were met with a quick wink before the druid ducked inside his own tent and out of sight. Your heart fluttered at the gesture and you quickly stepped inside your dwelling space and closed the flap just as you heard the tent next to you begin to stir for the morning.

Tag List: @thoughts-of-bear ,@beardedladyqueen, @pixie-in-a-moonlantern, @ur-friendly-nbhd-cardassian

#baldur's gate 3 #bg3 #halsin #daddy halsin #halsin x reader #reader x halsin #halsin x gender neutral reader #halsin romance #still very seriously considering smut #halsin fanfic #baldurs gate 3 fanfiction #fanfiction #bg3 fanfiction #halsin fanfiction

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mypoisonedvine · 9 months

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𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗱 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗻𝘁 | 4.2k (including intro)

𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀 | smut (18+ only), enemies to lovers, dom!neil, hatefucking/rough sex, oral sex m receiving/face fucking, choking, semi-public sex, praise and degradation (including extra mean degradation 👀), come swallowing

do NOT read this until you have read the FIRST PART or it won't make any damn sense!!

“How do I get it through your thick fucking skull that it’s not about money to me?” he growled.

“Then what’s it about?” you asked, reaching up to run your finger over his chest through the shirt, biting your lip.

“Dignity,” he answered with a sigh.

“Oh,” you smiled, starting to slide forward off the desk already, “dignity, huh?”

He watched in confused awe as you knelt on the floor in front of him, looking up at him sweetly.

“I can give you dignity,” you breathed, “all of mine. Then will you sell me the store, Neil?”

“F-fuck,” he choked out quietly as you licked your lips.

“You can finally put me in my place,” you offered, “isn’t that what you wanted?”

“Fuck,” he said again, roughly opening his belt and jeans for you; you smirked proudly, though your mouth fell into a gasp when he freed his hardening cock right in front of your face. And that gasp? He used it as an opportunity to shove his cock into your mouth quickly, barely giving you a second to comprehend it as he sighed deeply. “Suck it,” he ordered with a soft voice, groaning as you hollowed your cheeks and let him thrust forward into your mouth.

He wasn't too rough about it, not yet, but he eventually put his hands on your head to keep it steady as he moved his hips faster. You blinked a few times before looking up at him, making him moan just with a glance.

"Fuck, baby, you like that?" he grunted, going a little deeper this time to make you gag. "Yeah, fuck, you're right— this is what I wanted. You're such a fucking whore."

You tried to bob your head and take some control back, even reach up to use your hand, but he smacked it away and kept guiding you with a grip on your head.

“No hands— like a proper slut,” he explained, watching you as he slid back and forth between your lips. “Jesus, you’re getting lipstick on my cock.”

An attempt to glance at it just got you a light slap to the cheek.

“No, don’t look at it— look at me,” he ordered, sighing when you met his gaze again. “Look at me, baby,” he whispered still, even though you were doing it already, breathing in sharply through his teeth. “Fuck. That’s hot. You look good with a cock in your mouth.”

You couldn’t really respond, but you hummed softly around him.

“And it’s a nice way to shut you up, too,” he added.

He thrusted a little faster, sometimes tilting his head back and sometimes staring back into your eyes. And, of course, sometimes watching his cock fill your mouth with every movement.

You weren’t sure what to expect when he pulled back and slipped out of your mouth, looking up at him silently and expectantly. Whatever you thought he would do then, it definitely wasn’t forcing your head forward between his legs. “How about you lick my balls, too?” he offered— not that you had much choice with him shoving them in your face. You sighed through an open mouth and laved at them with your tongue, smiling slightly as he groaned louder. “God, you whore,” he breathed, but his fingers tightened in your hair— he could act in control all he wanted, but you sort of felt like you were the one with the power considering you had his most vulnerable body parts at the disposal of one of your most powerful ones.

Well, that power sort of dissipated a bit when he pulled you back and started fucking your mouth again, harder than ever— but you were still having a good time. And he still looked completely wrecked as he stared down at you, some impossible emotion on his face: something a little angry, quite a bit of disbelief, and a sick satisfaction all mixed together.

He gave you a few more thrusts, choking you each time until you worried you'd have to put your hands on his thighs to stop him, before suddenly losing his patience and stepping back to pull you up by your hair. You whimpered and obeyed quickly, only to gasp when he roughly bent you over the desk.

He pushed your skirt up over your ass with a growl, thick hands kneading and fingers toying with the edge of your lace panties. "You ever think about me bending you over this desk before?" he asked.

"Neil, honey— I don't really think about you at all," you lied.

He pulled the panties down to your thighs and ran two fingers through your folds. “Oh my god,” he breathed, “you’re so fucking wet… how’d that happen, baby? Thought you hated me.”

“I do,” you promised.

“Well, she’s a big fan,” he smirked, pushing two fingers into you until your legs quivered a bit.

“Come on, just fuck me,” you pleaded through your teeth, but you moaned loudly when he gave you a hard spank with his other hand as punishment for the backtalk.

“Shut up,” he warned, “we’re doing this my way, remember?”

He twisted his fingers inside you, making you whine and rock your hips up— you could say you were only acting so needy because you wanted to get this over with, but that wouldn't really explain why your heart was racing as you clung to that desk.

As he curled them inside you, your back arched slightly, and he purred in delight. What was he so good at this for? You always pegged him as the “sticks it in you for a few minutes and asks if it was good for you afterwards” sorta guy… maybe he usually was, you really didn’t know. But this really seemed out of character, in the best way.

He fucked you with his fingers, not very fast or rough— just enough to make you whimper and try to push back against him for more. “All this over just a couple fingers,” he noticed with a disappointed clicking of his tongue, “what am I gonna do with you, huh? So fucking desperate already.”

“You’re gonna do whatever you want with me,” you answered, breathing heavily, “isn’t that the point?”

He didn’t answer right away, just laughing a little instead, and your face burned a little warmer against the cool fake wood of the desk. “You said this was what I wanted,” he remembered, “but this is what you want, isn’t it?”

You nodded, even though you didn’t really expect that to be enough.

“Say it,” he encouraged.

“I want it,” you breathed. “I want you— I want you to fuck me, Neil.”

You sighed a little when you felt his thick head press to your opening, replacing the fingers; and he sighed as he pressed inside, your mouth falling open in a silent moan. The moan wasn't silent anymore when he pressed his hips flush against your ass and he was so deep that your eyes rolled back— actually, it was more like a sob than a moan.

"Fuck, it's tight," he sighed, "is that why you're such a bitch? 'Cause you don't get laid enough?"

You didn't answer of course: you were too busy holding onto the cheap desk like your life depended on it, considering he started fucking you harder and faster than you'd had in… actually, you weren't sure anybody had ever fucked you quite like this.

"I can fix that," he promised with a rough voice. "I can stretch this pussy out. That's what you need, right, whore?"

"Yes!" you choked out, the friction inside you all hot and electrical and making your stomach turn in just the right way. "Yes, god yes…"

You cried out when he smacked your ass, toes curling inside your heels.

“Oh, fuck, yes!” you yelped, quivering when he spanked you again. “Harder, Neil!”

He gave you the roughest one yet, and your legs shook— thank god the desk was holding you up.

“Oh my god, oh my god,” you whined, arching your back harder, but he suddenly put a hand over your mouth and laid down over you to speak sharply into your ear.

“They’re gonna hear you,” he warned. “Do you want them to know what a goddamn whore you are, huh? Do you want everyone to know?”

The hand moved down to your neck, wrapping around it tightly, and you nodded in approval before he properly squeezed and cut off the flow of air as your mouth gaped helplessly for breath. Your silence made it easier to hear his low little moans, the slapping of skin on skin; you shuddered again, feeling a new wave of wetness coat him as he thrusted into you.

“Oh, fuck,” he purred, letting go of your neck as you gasped loudly. “Fuck, you’re such a filthy slut.”

You moaned louder as you tried to catch your breath, noticing suddenly how much more sensitive you'd become inside from the choking. It felt as if each stroke rubbed right against where you needed it to, and your legs were shaking each time he knocked you forward into that desk.

There was a relatively predictable rhythm to it, aside from the bouts of choking that kept you on your toes. The best part, though, was the way he breathed and moaned into your ear, going back and forth between praising and demeaning you— sometimes even doing both at the same time. "Takin' it so fuckin' good— slutty little pussy takes me so good… fuck, squeeze me again— yeah, just like that, good girl. Good little slut."

He laughed at you a little when you shuddered, teasing you with a tightened grip on your neck that wasn't quite tight enough. "Neil," you whined impatiently.

"Beg for it," he ordered, seeming to keep his thrusts a little deeper to really hammer that squishy spot inside you.

"Please," you whispered, "choke me."

He grinned, you could feel it against your ear, as he gave you what you wanted. "Good girl," he praised again, watching your face go slack, "now say 'thank you'."

But he didn't let go of your neck, and you were starting to go numb all over in the best way.

"I can't hear you, baby," he taunted. "Don't you know it's polite to thank someone for giving you what you want?"

You gasped louder than ever, your whole body shaking, when he finally let you breathe again. "Thank you— fuck, thank you," you sputtered desperately.

"I knew this was what you needed," he hissed, "I knew from the first fucking second I saw you. I knew you needed somebody to remind you that you're just a cheap, desperate whore."

"Not that cheap," you managed to groan in reply. "You're selling your store for me. I think that makes me the most expensive whore in the city."

"Well shit, baby, you're worth every penny," he said— probably the last thing you expected him to say. Maybe it was the shock of it, the oddly kind comment, that affected you so much…

"Neil, f-fuck, I'm gonna come," you gasped.

"Jesus, you're easy," he laughed a little. "Come on my dick then, slut. Come all over my fucking dick."

"Ohh, fuck," you whimpered, voice getting higher-pitched as it seemed to match the intensity of the feeling inside you.

"Let them all hear who's making you come, baby," he cooed sweetly at you. "Make sure everyone knows…"

"Neil, fuck!" you cried out, a heavy weight seeming to drop you limply down on the desk as it hit you— a deep, swelling feeling that turned you into jelly. "Yes, Neil, yes… f-fuck, m'coming…"

"I know," he grunted, leaning up enough to look down at you as his hands pinned you down at the shoulders. "I know, fuck, I can feel it— you're drenching me, oh my god…"

He had no trouble using you as hard and fast as he wanted, hips clapping as he tilted his head back, sticky-wet sounds filling the room and your ringing ears as your orgasm nearly dropped down your legs. It has come and gone relatively quickly, but it had certainly left its mark.

For someone who had just mocked you for how quickly you came, he didn't last all that much longer himself.

“When I pull out,” he whispered to you, “you have about five seconds to get on your knees again and swallow all my fucking come. Got it?”

“Y-yes,” you panted, obeying hastily when he stepped back a second later. It was a bit harder to do what he’d said than you expected, on account of your unanticipated dizziness, but you turned around and got on your knees in front of him as he stroked his cock quickly. You wrapped your mouth around the tip just in time to feel the first pump of come hit your tongue, and his hand moved from his cock to the back of your head to push you further down on his length.

He moaned loudly as he came— honestly, you thought it was insanely hot, and you hummed back as he filled your mouth. You figured he was done when his cock twitched and one more drop of come rolled down from the slit; you slowly pulled back, suckling gently at the tip on your way off, and let him go with a wet pop from your lips. You opened your mouth for him to see it first— all the thick, salty come he’d given you— and he sighed as he watched you shut your lips and swallow it quickly.

There was a quiet moment, not a very long one, as you looked at each other. You wondered if he was realizing what he’d just done— and whether selling the store or fucking you was more of an issue to him— and found yourself shockingly at ease about it all. No sudden regret, no spark of clarity… just a grin that you couldn’t fight off.

“Well,” you began with a smile as you stood up to face him, suddenly feeling much more composed than he looked, “pleasure doing business with you.”

“Y-you too,” he agreed. "We should… do this again sometime…"

You raised an eyebrow already turning to leave. "If you have any other stores to sell me, sure," you shrugged.

"Hey," he said sternly, grabbing you by the wrist and pulling you into him. "Don't act like that," he warned as you looked up at him, his hand still on yours and the other reaching up to tenderly hold your face. "You can't act like that with me anymore."

"I can do whatever I want, Neil," you informed him softly.

"Yeah," he agreed, "so call me."

"I will," you offered, and that was enough to get him to let go of you. Only then did you add your stipulation as you adjusted your skirt again and walked out of his office: "if I want to."

You walked through the store carefully, so as not to show the slight limp you'd acquired from Neil's brutal treatment. The other men's eyes were all over you, and you wiped the corners of your mouth with your fingers to really get the point across.

As you passed Lucien, you pulled a pamphlet out of your blazer's inner pocket and shoved it into his chest: Media Giant Employee Guidebook.

As you passed them and approached the front door, you turned around; Lucien looked stunned, Jonathan looked amused, and Neil… Neil was leaning against the wall nearest to his office, staring at you with half-lidded eyes, still a little sweaty and panting.

"You should be getting a packet in the mail about your new health insurance," you informed them, before finally finding the energy to give that classic corporate smile as you leaned back against the door to slip out and say: "Welcome to the Media Giant family, boys."

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solemnarration · 2 years

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the girl with the books | r.l

pairings: remus lupin x reader (she/her pronouns) genre(s): marauder era, strangers to lovers, fluff, humour summary: james and sirius notice that it’s not the books that keep remus in the library, and are determined to know whether you – the object of remus’s affection – return his feelings. word count: 3.0k warning(s): none note: this is a 2022 update of the fic of the same name that i wrote back in 2016! my writing has improved by leaps and bounds and i couldn’t help but edit and improve the fic that a few of you seemed to really love :) i hope you enjoy it if you liked the original, or that you find something new to read

The Hogwarts library was the place where you found the most solace. Even on the few days that the Scottish countryside provided undisturbed sunshine, like today, you preferred to curl up with a book on one of the grand wooden tables. You enjoyed your time in the library; reading fiction or researching different topics that you were curious about. While your friends encouraged you to enjoy the warm day with them, you easily waved them off in favour of the dimly lit library.

Remus Lupin could be found in the library as often as you, except it wasn’t the books that kept him coming back. The sight of you sitting in a corner reading by yourself was enough to draw his attention every few minutes. He couldn’t even help himself, his eyes had no choice in the way they continually found your figure, but he was in no place to complain.

Remus sat with his three best friends at the other end of the library, and they were less than happy to be spending the first sunny day of spring in the library rather than bothering the giant squid in the black lake. Now that the weather was no longer freezing, Sirius and James were desperate to cause some mischief, and Peter was happy to comply.

“What is it that you find so fascinating about a hall full of books?” Sirius inquired, lifting a book up from the table, grimacing at the idea of spending his free time reading, and carelessly dropping it back onto the table.

Remus flinched as the sound resonated throughout the library, capturing your attention as you gave the four friends an inquisitive look. For a moment, Remus held his breath, unable to tear his eyes away from you as you gave him a speck of casual attention. Realising it was just James Potter and his friends messing around, you happily returned to your reading without a second thought.

“It’s not about the books, Padfoot,” Remus snapped quietly, glancing away with reddened cheeks, the heat of your gaze on him still warming his body. “And I didn’t force you to be here,” he reminded.

“Well, no,” Sirius sighed. “But it’s terribly tragic for you to spend the first nice day Hogwarts has seen in-“

“A decade,” James chimed in, exaggerating to help Sirius make a point.

“A decade,” Sirius agreed with a nod. “Inside a hall full of books instead of playing outside with us! As your friend, it’s our duty to convince you to abandon this wretched place and do something more fun.”

“Well said, Padfoot,” James agreed, tall frame spread languidly across three chairs in a makeshift bed. “Dare I say, revolutionary. So, black lake, Moony?”

“I’m perfectly content here, thank you very much,” Remus refused, thoroughly entertained by James and Sirius’s usual dramatics.

“Who could be content in such an oppressive place,” Sirius complained, as if he himself didn’t have good grades and didn’t spend time studying in this very library. “Other than Lily,” he added, recognising the smitten glint in James’s eyes that he got every time he brought her up.

“She’s so responsible, my lovely Lily,” James sighed, pleased with himself. “I’m going to marry that girl, just you wait and see. It’s the only reason I come to the library with her.”

“You come to the library to chat up Lily? No wonder you aren’t dating yet,” Sirius teased. As James and Sirius went back and forth poking fun at each other, Peter pondered Remus’s words.

“If you’re not here for the books, what are you here for?” Peter wondered aloud, causing Sirius and James to glance expectantly at their friend.

Remus rolled his eyes, intending to fabricate a fantastic comeback that would distract his three friends, but even the thought of you caused his stare to drift back to where you were, now getting up to choose a different book to check out of the library.

He loved the way you did that. Even if you finished a book in your time at the library, you always made sure to bring a book with you.

Remus loved the way you did everything, really. He had always liked you, ever since you loaned him a quill when he forgot his during Defence Against the Dark Arts. Even now, it was his favourite class just because it made him think of you.

“Moony?” Sirius waved a hand in front of Remus’s face in an attempt to grab his attention. “Remus, what are you staring at?” he followed Remus’s gaze and saw exactly what he was staring at. “Oh,” he said, finally connecting all the very obvious clues together. “It’s not a what, it’s a who,” Sirius practically giggled with glee.

James’s head snapped in your direction, scrambling to sit up and launch himself next to Sirius in an effort to get a good look at you. This commotion once again drew your attention, leading James and Sirius to act as naturally as they could. They picked up the books stacked in front of them and made a big deal out of reading the text aloud, the act so comical and over-the-top that it couldn’t possibly be convincing.

You grinned to yourself, shaking your head in amusement, and slipped behind a bookshelf to look over the Herbology section. Frank Longbottom had recommended a delightful title on growing Dittany and other healing herbs, and you took the older boy’s recommendations very seriously.

Once you were out of sight, James tossed his book thoughtlessly aside, snatching Remus’s book from his grasp to gain his undivided attention. “Who is that, Moony my dear?” James asked, adjusting his glasses. They had slipped down his nose when he whipped his head around to look at you, and the act had made the boy a little dizzy.

“Who?” Remus asked, knowing that his performance was pitiful and unconvincing, and pretending not to understand regardless of this fact. “What do you mean?”

Frustrated that Remus was lying, and subsequently that he was an absolutely terrible liar, Sirius exclaimed, “The girl you were staring at!”

“Who is that girl? Do you know her?” James asked excitedly, taking a more enthusiastic approach than Sirius in hopes that it would make Remus open up about his crush.

“Girl?” Remus repeated, squinted as if he was giving this conversation a real good thought, before widening his eyes sarcastically. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, sorry boys.”

James and Sirius shared a look – having a silent conversation that Remus would promptly regret keeping them in the dark about his crush – before rolling their eyes and sighing. They had decided it: they were just going to have to catch you when Remus was gone.

A few hours later, it had darkened considerably since you first entered the library, and once you realised that you had been hauled up in the library for a considerable amount of time, you realised how hungry you were. Perhaps camping out in the library all day without a proper lunch wasn’t your best idea, but at least you knew dinner would be ready soon.

Rising, you stretched your legs before collecting all the books you had flicked through that day and moving to stow them back in their original places on the tall Hogwarts library shelves. Most of them were within a reasonable reach, slotting easily into their previous spots as you strolled happily throughout the library. However, one of the books was at a considerably higher place on the shelf, and you couldn’t put it away even on the tips of your toes.

With a huff of frustration, you stood flat on your feet and were about to reach for your wand when someone took the book from your grasp. “Here,” a voice said from behind you. “Let me help you with that!”

You turned just in time to see Sirius Black easily putting your book away for you, his friend James Potter standing nearby with an uncharacteristic spring in his step. Though James and Sirius were always a ball of energy in the classes you shared with them, the grins they sported today were difficult to identify. Perhaps mischievous would be the best way to describe the perfect simpers on their faces.

“Thanks,” you acknowledged his help with furrowed brows, wondering what Sirius and James could possibly be so ecstatic about. When the two boys simply stared at you, unmoving, you figured that they wanted something from you. “Did you two need something?” you asked, their unwavering smiles growing slightly unnerving.

“Oh!” Sirius seemed to realise that they were staring at you, and how disturbing this might be to a girl they had hardly spoken to. “Right! Yes, actually. We wanted to have a word with you.”

“Okay,” you nodded as if this wasn’t unusual. James and Sirius certainly didn’t seem to think their behaviour was odd, so you figured they were harmless on this particular occasion.

“We were just wondering if you knew Remus,” James explained himself, barely keeping still with excitement. “I mean, you do know him, don’t you?”

You nodded, still weary of where the conversation was leading. Sirius and James were known to be pranksters, and you weren’t sure if you were the next victim of one of their jokes. “Yes, I know Remus,” you confirmed. “He’s your friend, right? I speak to him sometimes when we’re in the library at the same time.” When Sirius and James linked hands and started jumping up and down, utter confusion overwhelmed you. “Uh, why do you ask?”

Noticing your discomfort, James and Sirius stopped jumping in favour of smiling at you. “I’m sorry, what was your name again? We share a few classes but between listening to the Professor and keeping James in check it can be hard to keep up,” Sirius said, his natural charisma making him instantly likeable.

“Y/n,” you introduced yourself.

“Nice to meet you, Y/n,” James said politely. “Now, this may seem quite blunt, but we want to set you up with our friend Remus,” he said matter-of-factly, followed by an encouraging nod from Sirius.

Your eyes widened at the confession. “Oh,” you said awkwardly. “I’m not going to lie, I had no idea that’s what you were going to say.”

“We have that effect on people,” said James, nodding sympathetically, as if people often had this reaction to the things they said. “So? What do you say? Give our mate Remus a chance?”

“Oh, I don’t think that’s a good idea,” you shook your head, trying to smile politely.

The smiles on Sirius and James’s faces faded. “Why not?” Sirius inquired, tilting his head to the side as he observed your nervous expression. “Do you not like Remus?”

“Why wouldn’t you like Remus?” James added, appalled and affronted at the mere idea of someone not liking their best friend. “You like reading, don’t you? Well, Remus might even have you beat! He’s the world’s biggest bookworm.”

“Incorrigible,” Sirius agreed. “Can’t get him out of this bloody library. And you aren’t helping, either,” he added.

“I’m not?”

“Of course not!” James exclaimed. “You only keep him here even longer than usual! Even on a day as lovely as this.”

“Perfect for wasting time,” sighed Sirius, lamenting the wonderful day outside they had missed out on. “So, how come you don’t like Remus?”

“That’s not it,” you said hurriedly, struggling to get a word in amongst their quick banter. “It’s just,” you sighed. “Why are you asking me this anyway?” you changed the subject, hoping it would take some of the heat off of you.

Luckily for you, it worked. “Well, Remus seems to have developed a crush on you,” James said casually, as if he wasn’t bearing one of his best friends’ deepest secret. Well, second deepest secret. “It’s really quite adorable. All the typical crush symptoms. You know, longing gazes,” James began listing the many qualities he had noticed in Remus during the last few hours. “Romantic, hopeless sighing whenever you’re around, losing focus, refusing to play with his best friends even on a day as perfect as this.”

“The list goes on!” Sirius exclaimed. You had to smile at the two friends, not only were they quite comical, but they seemed to be buzzing with endless energy. “I think it would benefit you to give Remus a chance. He’s rather attractive, our friend.”

“Though, not as attractive as us,” James added, winking to show that he was joking.

“Well we can’t hold everyone to such impossible standards,” Sirius said sympathetically, nodding to himself. “Still, he’s quite attractive! Charming and kind, too. All the things girls like. So are you in?”

“Well,” you stammered, feeling your face burning with embarrassment when you saw how intently Sirius and James were looking at you.

To save you from your answer, the sound of Remus’s footsteps and voice interrupted your sentence. “What are you boys still doing here,” he froze when he came into view, noticing the way Sirius and James had cornered you. “Y/n?” he asked, the picture of you hanging out with his two best friends nothing short of foreign and unfamiliar. Remus sighed in annoyance when he saw Sirius and James exchange guilty faces. “What have these two told you?” he asked you, already dreading your answer.

“We didn’t tell her much,” Sirius said, quick to defend their actions. “We’ve just been… talking,” he added, purposely leaving out the subject matter. James nodded rigorously, smiling innocently at Remus with visible panic in his eyes.

“I’ll talk to you both later,” Remus said to his friend, tone firm and borderline scolding. Then, he faced you with what looked like an apologetic smile. “Do you need help putting that away?” he asked, nudging his head to the last two books in your arms

You smiled, instantly more comfortable now that Remus was there. With a nod, you left Sirius and James behind in favour of putting your books away. “Listen,” Remus began, gently taking your books and putting them on the correct shelf in the Herbology section. “I’m really sorry for whatever Sirius and James said,” he let out a nervous laugh, easily reaching the high shelves thanks to his tall height.

“Don’t be,” you shrugged, charmed by Remus’s very presence. Something about Remus’s gentle spirit contrasted comfortably with Sirius and James’s craziness, and it settled your heart in a wonderful way. “They meant well, I think,” you smiled up at Remus. “Your friends are really nice.”

“I wouldn’t say nice, perhaps deranged is more accurate,” Remus joked, a pleased smile gracing his lips when you laughed. “But they’re pretty great. I can always count on them to say things I’m too scared to say,” he admitted, trailing off into a comfortable silence.

“I don’t know about them being deranged, but they did have some interesting things to say,” you admitted, fully intending to tease Remus once you realised his friends were telling the truth. He really did have a crush on you. “All about crushes, and longing gazes,” you added, grinning when you saw Remus turn slightly pink at your insinuation.

Remus groaned, lifting his hands to cover his face in embarrassment. “Oh Merlin,” he muttered, nervous laughter bubbling from his mouth. “I’m so sorry! If anything they said made you uncomfortable, I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t be,” you shook your head. “I wasn’t uncomfortable. Stunned by the sheer force of their energy? Definitely. But not uncomfortable. I guess it was just hard to believe,” you admitted. “Still is, really.”

“What, that I fancy you?” Remus asked, uncovering his eyes once you assured him that you weren’t upset. “Why is that hard to believe?”

“I don’t know, you’re… Remus Lupin,” you explained terribly. “You’re a Gryffindor and you’re funny and popular. Your friends didn’t even know what my name was and I’ve been in your class for nearly six years now,” you recalled, shrugging your shoulders good-naturedly.

“Sirius and James hardly remember their own names, I wouldn’t take it personally,” Remus wisecracked, though there was a seriousness in his eyes that made you believe his words. “Besides, the trouble is only just starting!” he added. “Now that they know your name, you won’t be able to get rid of them.”

“Sounds terrifying,” you joked back, grinning.

“There’s no escaping those two,” Remus said dramatically. “I’ve been trying to shake them for six years now, but they don’t seem to care.”

“Maybe I should change my name,” you offered.

“Why didn’t I think of that?” Remus burst out, laughing at your banter. You grinned at each other, so absorbed with the other person that you didn’t notice Sirius and James poke their heads around the shelf to eavesdrop on your conversation. “Y/n, do you think,” Remus paused, intimidated by the adorable way in which you turned your head and smiled at him. You were overwhelmingly perfect, and it was really starting to distract the poor boy. “Would you maybe…”

“Would I maybe?” you encouraged.

“Would you maybe want to go to Hogsmeade with me? This upcoming weekend? If you’re not busy that weekend, I mean,” Remus said, barely getting the words out without struggling.

“Oh,” the smile on your face widened almost impossibly so. “I think I might be busy,” Remus’s face dropped, eyes averting to his feet to hide his disappointment. “Changing my name to avoid these two boys I just met. However, their friend is pretty cute, so perhaps I could postpone my plans,” you added quickly, not wanting your joke to go badly.

Remus’s head rose quickly to meet your eyes, a relieved sigh leaving him. “Really?” he asked rhetorically, and before you could confirm your answer, you heard loud cheering come from beside you. Within seconds, James and Sirius leapt out from behind you and tackled Remus into a hug.

“Yeah Remus!”

“That’s our best friend!”

“Our best friend is finally going on a date!”

“Don’t scare her off,” Remus warned, pushing James away as he started peppering kisses across his face. “Seriously, stop it,” he laughed, not meaning a single word.

“No,” Sirius said proudly, pulling you in to join their hug. “Y/n’s just going to have to get used to us.”

You quite liked the sound of that.

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demonslayedher · 1 year

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Low-Key Married AU fluff

Kochou said that I was disliked, so I asked her if she disliked me too. For someone so quick to have a smiling response to everything, she struggled to reply. She was the one who proposed marriage and swayed me, so I had thought that meant she had feelings for me. There would be no other way to read it. However, with as unbothered as she is by my absence, I have to wonder.

It’s been ten days since I had last contact with her. I went home to the Butterfly Mansion, but she had just departed for a mission, so I didn’t stay long so as not to trouble the girls. It may still be a few days before I can return again, but it’s always likely she’ll be busy. She’s incredible in that way, taking on all the care of our injured Corp members in addition to her Pillar missions. It must be in her personality to keep adding to what keeps her busy, like taking me in as though I looked like I needed the care. Although the times we’ve spent together have been nice, I don’t require it. My duties call for me to always be ready for battle, and I’ve always kept my heart steady.

So has she. We are Pillars first, and no amount of affection can sway us—whether an abundance or a lack.

I’m not bothered by lacking something I didn’t deserve in the first place.

Last night again, I was too late to prevent a family from being slaughtered. There were no survivors this time, aside from the eldest child who was still ravenous with a recent transformation. Having to chase him down and keep him from harming anyone else kept me off the trail of the progenitor of demons, who had to have been close by. For centuries, he’s evaded us this way over and over, sacrificing entire families to throw us off his trail. If I were to chide myself over every failure, I would have lost the ability to do anything ages ago. Each time, the anger is something I carry with me, to push myself harder the next time, and the next. Any extent more that I can push myself may be the difference to someone’s survival, no one can afford to lose their life over any of my own lost confidence.

“CAW!! TOMIOKA GIYUUUU! NEWS FOR TOMIOKA GIYUUUU!”

Each time it's a crow I think I recognize, my stomach drops. My mind is already playing the words I dread to hear, as though trying to protect my mind once I someday hear them.

"Kochou Shinobu has died."

Even if I hear them, I'm a Pillar first. That was what we promised each other. I'll always do as I must.

The crow says nothing as it delivers a letter.

YES, YES, I KNOW, THIS FANDOM HAS TURNED ME INTO SHIPPER TRASH. For this pairing, it was more specifically my own joke AU which later bit me in the back and made me start really, really enjoying GiyuShino (which, for the record, I do not consider canon). Was throwing ideas back and forth with @reicchel again the other day and so here we are with ship content!

Part of the reason I love the Low-Key Married AU (in which it's mostly canon as usual, except that Shinobu and Giyuu have been married for over a year or so, and it's not a secret but they make such little deal about it that many people don't even know they're married) is that it's a frame through which to see every interaction and either make it really, really funny, or very, very, sad. Everything was supposed to be funny, but it keeps hurting, hahaha... aaahhhh.

For instance, in a regular romcom situation, it should be funny that Kanzaburo doesn't deliver all of Giyuu's letters. Knowing these two, who might had started this whole "well, we'll be a couple when we have time" thing by actively writing regular letters, this could had simply given the impression that the other person wasn't writing as much, so they both naturally decreased frequency to match. It's a little lonely, but neither one is going to push the other for more attention.

No!! I refuse to let this post end with angst! Time for omake!!!

#I spent a few days enjoying high-brow Noh and now I'm back to shipper trash #giyushino #giyuu x shinobu #tomioka giyuu #tomioka giyu #kocho shinobu #kochou shinobu #my art #too bad for you Tanjiro your karma in this AU had to even out somehow #also that is the happiest Giyuu I have ever drawn and it's adorable #GiyuShino Low Key Married AU

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synnlyrose · 5 months

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Say It

Levi Ackerman 🩶

{T.W ‼️ LevixReader. A bit of SoftDom Levi. Pussy touching, neck kisses. Light Smut, but smut nonetheless, Levi calls reader "my dear". Naughty words. Read at own risk.// .MDNI.)

Kind of edited--kinda not 🤷🏽‍♀️

😁 did I tag it right this time?? Did I miss anything? Feed back is much appreciated! And thank all you for the likes on my writing! ~Syn~

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Rough finger pads didn't always equate rough touches. The sensation of Levi's finger tips ghosting up your thigh was enough to make you shiver. It always amazed you how the harsh and blunt Captain could manage to be so gentle with you.

Your pretty innocent eyes fluttered up into his dark ones. Your hand wandering up his forearm, tracing the small tattoo that was placed in the crook of his elbow. His skin was warm and inviting.

Levi's face moved towards your neck, placing his soft lips against the warm clammy skin. Goosebumps followed in their absence. Levi let his fingers roam closer and closer to the hem of your skirt, he swallowed in your ear before he spoke, his voice a low husky whisper.

"Tell me what you want my dear..." He purred so effortlessly in to your earlobe making you bite your lip in a mixture of awed frustration. His hand encased the edge of your skirt as he pulled it up around your waist, using that same hand to part your thighs. "I need to hear you say it, Y/n..."

Levi's voice alone could make you submit but yet you held your ground. Levi could sense the defiance in your actions and it made him chuckle in a titillating manner as he sucked in a sharp breath, bringing his lips back to your ear lobe. Levi was a patient man and had no quarrels with getting you to stop being so bratty no matter how long it took. He knew it only made you needier in the end and gave him all the excuses in the world to tease you, until you broke.

"Y/n..." He exhaled, letting his lips press against your ear, as his fingers delicately dug into your skin. "You know, acting like a brat has never gone in your favor...I don't know why you constantly try to defy me..." He finished, his breath hot and heavy rolling through your ear drums like liquid hot honey. Leaving behind a slight tickling feeling, making your entire body hum to life.

His racy threat had you whimpering as he got the natural reaction out of you and you glanced up from where his fingers rested on your thigh up to his lips, before his eyes.

Levi had a swaggering little smirk on his face, as he brought his free finger up to tap your lips as he spoke, his smirk pulling into a full on toothsome grin.

"I know you're wet, my dear, I can smell your arousal from here..." Levi continued to tease the touch of filth in his voice didn't go unnoticed as a tremor ripped through you adding even more arousal to your core.

"Use your words..." Levi coached again, digging his nails into your skin as he dragged his fingers upwards towards your pelvic area, using two of his fingers to hold your skirt back, two of his digits, swiping lazily across your pulsating clit.

That one little touch of his fingers had your eyes going wide. You watched his wrist, with focused eyes, you watched it move back and forth devastatingly slow as Levi teased you.

There was something about him that was so...aphrodisiacal. Alluring. Addicting. Maybe it was the way he always remained so calm, even when annoyed? Or how unbroken his movements were when he pleased you? Or how handsome his face was when he was buried deep inside of you? He always remained glacial, yet he couldn't fight back the tiny pants and groans that escaped out of him as he pounded into you. His steamy remarks that kept your toes curling and eyes merely focused on his. His voice always cool yet lewd as he coaxed you into watching his cock slide in and out of you.

Stoic but nasty and he always drove you to the brink of sexual madness, nymphomania. He managed to create a insatiable hunger for him and him only. It drove its way so deep into your core, that your stomach tingled at the mere idea of Levi having his way with you.

"Y/n?" That same cool tone pulled you back to reality as another sharp swipe across your clit had you gasp slightly. Your lips trembled as you finally spoke up, "Please, Levi, take me..." the erogenous desperation in your voice made Levi smirk.

And he did just that~

#levi ackerman smut #levi ackerman #smut writer #aot smut #anime #aot x reader #levi smut #levi x reader #levi aot #soft d0m #aot fanfiction #levi attack on titan

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atlasofthestaars · 8 months

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[MK X READER] New Era - Chapter .011

first part | previous part | next part

NOTE: HERE WE ARE Y’ALL!! THE START OF THE OUTWORLD TOURNAMENT ARC!

Some context: For the sake of having more interactions and letting me write more I’m extending the tournament to have a fight per day + a bit more at the end. So basically the outworld tourney will be 7 days for each fight + a day or two more <3

Havik made it in as a love interest! His poll was so chaotic, which I guess makes sense? Haha, Ashrah made it in too, and she was by far the closest we’ve had to the 50/50! Now that Ashrah’s chapter is done, it means that’s our completed love interest roster! I have updated all the tags/the intro to fit this!

Even though the poll for chapter 10 is done on Tumblr, I do need to still calculate the votes from AO3 too, so that means it’s mainly between Johnny vs Bi Han, so I’ll announce the winner of that next chapter.

Here’s a genuine thank you all for reading this <3 I am overwhelmed by all the love and support you guys give, you’re all so amazing! Also haha sorry how long this took to finally get out.

FROM THE EYES OF ONE WHO EXPERIENCES OUTWORLD FOR THE FIRST TIME

You barely had time to decipher the memories you had unlocked.

You, after all, had other duties to attend to. Or at least, that’s what you told yourself. The tournament was a week away after all, so you had a lot of last minute duties you wanted to wrap up before going away for a little over a week. Or at least, that long assuming Raiden would win his challenges. You were thankful for the last minute tasks you had found to busy yourself with. You weren’t quite sure if you really wanted to dwell on what you had seen.

It, in all honesty, scared you.

How else were you supposed to respond to suddenly seeing a bunch of gore and having a major part of your backstory unlocked? You were handed the burden of learning that you went through, and yet it only added more questions. Throughout the week you considered confiding in Liu Kang about it all: telling him how you’re terrified of what you saw, and how you’re sorry you lied.

But you just couldn’t.

Fear grasped at you, sewing your mouth shut. It wasn’t as if you were afraid of Liu Kang hating you at first. You’re certain Liu Kang would allow you to tell him your tale with no judgement. You’d even bet on your own life that he would even comfort you for what you saw. He was far too kind to you. But then your mind kept on spiraling over the idea of what happens after.

He’d ask why you lied. Then he’d find out you’ve always lied about your memories, or at least not told him about them. It was a slippery slope. And there was just a lot of things to unpack there that would surely fracture the relationship between you and the god. And, while you weren’t taking advantage of him, the selfish voice in your head whispered how you couldn’t ruin the only chance at Outworld and finally find out more.

You came up with a solution to calm your nerves, even just a bit, that maybe you should finally tell him after the trip…assuming you got the courage to.

You weren’t sure if you trusted yourself on your little solution though, after all your mind poisoned your thoughts, still telling you that it was better you lied to him and to continue to lie to him. It had worked out so far, why change things? After all, you had a gut feeling that Liu Kang was keeping back secrets from you too. It was just a gut feeling, but you trusted your gut. But you also trusted Liu Kang. It was a debate you kept on going back and forth on, and could never figure out a conclusion to.

You felt like you had a right to keep these things secret. He wasn’t obligated to know every single thing about you. The god probably had a reason to keep things from you as well, just like you did. You weren’t obligated to know everything either, even if you so desperately wanted to. Still, you selfishly decided for now it was fair to keep your own secrets. It was to protect yourself.

You were definitely visiting Madam Bo after this trip, maybe you needed some good advice on this one.

“Are you overworking yourself?” Liu Kang inquired as you passed by one afternoon. You had been going to and fro, trying to distract yourself. You stopped, the authority in his voice making you pause. You shifted in place, avoiding looking at him as you cast your gaze to the side.

“No, I haven’t.” You had told him, which had been partially true. While you had been running around like a chicken whose head had been cut off, you hadn’t been over doing it. At least, by your standards. You took in a deep breath as you felt Liu Kang grab one of your hands. You looked up in surprise as his hand squeezed yours gently.

“Good.” He said, his voice full of warmth. Your stomach squirmed as you were filled with guilt at the look he gave you. A smile was on his lips. His thumb gently rubbed a few circles on the back of your hand, as if he were casting a protective spell on you. “I’m proud of how well you trained Raiden and the others. I am certain Raiden will do great at the tournament.”

You were at a loss of words, feeling your chest tighten. You nodded instead, and Liu Kang dropped your hand. He gave you a pat on the back as he passed you, walking off to what you assumed was the Wu Shi to help Raiden. You felt…colder. You supposed it was simply a side effect of Liu Kang being a fire god and him no longer being by your side.

Liu Kang made keeping secrets difficult.

Still, despite your worries, the week breezed by fast. And now you found yourself standing in front of the Fire Temple, waiting for your students and the monks to arrive. You swallowed your nerves, trying to force yourself to feel more relaxed. This was supposed to be exciting after all.

To your delight, you weren’t waiting long. The monks first arrived, and you directed them happily to the waiting area for whenever Liu Kang was ready. Many of them had regarded you warmly. Then, you smiled as you saw your four students come and arrive.

“Excited?” You inquired as they drew closer. You scanned them, noting their choice of outfits. It had been a while since you’ve seen them wear anything other than their most casual clothes or their Shaolin uniforms. It was a bit odd, but it was a breath of fresh air. The outfits suited them well.

“I’m excited, albeit a bit overwhelmed and nervous.” Raiden admitted a mixture of nervousness and a genuine smile on his face. He tipped his head forward, his straw hat obscuring the look on his face. Despite that, you forced your gaze on his head, trying to avoid the amulet that sent fear down your spine. You wanted to look at anything but that right now

“Psh, you’ll be fine.” Kung Lao scoffed, placing a reassuring hand on his friend’s shoulder. He shot you a look of disbelief as he gestured to the new champion. “He’s been in his head about this whole thing, can you believe it?” He looked back over to his friend, shaking him slightly with the hand on his shoulder. “You have to be more confident. If you can beat me you can handle them all.” You smiled at his encouragement nodding.

“Kung Lao’s right, Raiden.” You told him, crossing your arms. “There’s a reason why you’re our champion.” You watched as Raiden’s head lifted up, a more confident expression on his face, though it was still tinged with a bit of nervousness. “Be confident in your abilities, otherwise I will start to think I’m a bad teacher.” You jested, adding on a small chuckle.

“You are anything but that.” Raiden commented, making your smile grow just a bit wider. The others nodding as well warmed your heart. You shooed them off after that short moment, yet one of them hung back to linger. While the Fengjian farmers were too caught up talking to each other to notice, you noted the side eye Kenshi shot Johnny as he hung back. Odd.

“You aren’t exempt from waiting with the others, you know.” You said, raising an eyebrow as you eyed Johnny. The actor shot you his signature grin, which you both knew didn’t work on you. With a confident stride, Johnny slung an arm over your shoulder and pulled out his phone. You raised an eyebrow at the casual contact, but didn’t shrug him off. Over the last few months, ever since the late night discussion, you’ve grown used to the causal contact.

You just assumed Johnny was getting more friendly with you.

“I know, teach.” Johnny said, causally scrolling through his phone. You tried to keep your gaze away from it out of respect, but the temptation was strong. “But I think I have something that might interest you.” He said, sending you a sly look. You simply looked at him with an unimpressed look, and he took it as his cue to continue on. “I hear you and hat boy had a bet?” He inquired, still showing off his pearly whites to you.

“And what of it?” You asked, placing a hand on your hip as you sent him a skeptical look. Your head tilted as you thought of why he would bring it up. You figured it wasn’t the oddest thing he knew about it, Kung Lao had probably bragged about his victory to the group. You had settled that you would make him his feast after the trip.

“Well, what if I told you I might have some video evidence that might please you?” He said, his voice dripping with confidence. Your eyebrows raised again, and you pursed your lips, not knowing what to make of his offer. “Listen, it’s all legit. I recorded the hat kid and thunder lad discussing something and you might be interested in seeing it.” He egged you on.

“And why are you telling me this?” You inquired, looking at Johnny with the same skeptical look, not quite yet taking the bait.

“Look, I like you teach, so I wanna cut you a sweet deal.” The actor said, and you knew he was trying to work up his charisma. “You get the ultimate evidence towards Kung Lao so you rectify your little bet and I get a little reward too.” Johnny offered, waving his phone with a paused video on the screen. Now he was deliberately showing you the screen.

You squinted at the phone. You could see the back of Kung Lao, he seemed to be talking to Raiden who seemed to have a somewhat disapproving look on his face. You looked more carefully. It seemed to be the same day of the exam, so it would fall under the betting time.

“Alright, I’ll bite. What do you want?” You asked, a small sigh leaving your lips as you finally relented. You saw Johnny’s grin grow wider as he raised his eyebrows in a cocky manner. His smile turned into a self assured smirk, thinking he had you in his trap.

“I saw from tattoo that you started hooking him up with some sweet meals.” He started, and you blinked in surprise at the topic of conversation. You nodded, then let him speak more. “I think that little feast you were planning to make that hat boy, you give to me…and Madam Bo’s special tea.”

“I’ll give you Madam Bo’s special tea and just one meal.” You counter offered quickly, crossing your arms. You watched as Johnny Cage sent you an offended look. You held back a chuckle of amusement at the expression.

“After my generous deal?” The American asked, his face scrunching up. “No way, wildstyle!” He scoffed, a small pout on his lips. You shook your head in amusement as you sent him a look.

“You may think you have the high ground here with your little offer, but you gave me more information than you thought you did.” You said, pointing at his phone screen. His eyes glanced over to the paused screen. “I can just ask Raiden if Kung Lao cut his finger.” You pointed out. “I think he’d be more likely to tell me if I just asked.”

“Hm…” Johnny stared at you for a good long moment. You could see the gears turning in his head at your point. You assumed he had plenty of experience in this sort of thing. “You think that golden boy would betray his best buddy like that?”

“Maybe, maybe not, but I can always offer him what I offered youI’m certain he’d take the deal and you’d be left with nothing.” You point out with a shrug, trying to hold out a little on your bluff. You weren’t entirely sure if Raiden would take your offer, but it was worth a bluff.

“Fine.” Johnny groaned with a pout, his head dropping. His head brushed your shoulder, and you rolled your eyes in a playful way. “You drive a hard bargain. You ever consider becoming an agent for Hollywood?” He inquired, tilting his head to look at you, his cheek still resting on your shoulder. “I could use someone like you.”

“Hah, funny offer.” You laughed, and Johnny’s smile returned in a more sincere way. “I think I’d rather act in one of your movies than become whatever your agent is.” You remarked, which grew Johnny’s smile even more. You used your hand to move his head off your shoulder. “Chin up, Johnny.”

“Really now?” He said, a hint of amusement and hope in his voice. “I’ll be holding you up to that statement, you know.” Johnny said, nudging you a bit with his shoulder.

“I didn’t commit to anything, Cage.” You pointed out with a small shake of your head. “Now show me the video you were bragging so much about.” You commanded, looking from the actor to the paused video he had been waving in front of your face. With a small smile, he tapped the screen, unpausing the video.

You watched as Kung Lao approached Raiden, talking to him about something. His back was to the camera, so it was a bit hard to see what he was exactly doing, but you can glean enough from what he was saying. You could see him, or at least you assumed, trace the brim of the hat. Then you heard an “ow” and the man winced.

You watched with a slow smirk spreading across your lips as he froze, before quickly telling Raiden that he “didn’t see anything”. Raiden looked very confused at the sudden command, which prompted Kung Lao to tell him that he would just “tell him later”. All he had to do was just not tell you about it.

“There, as promised.” Johnny told you, a cheeky grin sent your way. You returned the look before peering back down at the video, which continued to play, showing Kung Lao now showing off his hat. “Aren’t you glad I’m looking out for you, wildstyle?”

“I’m honored.” You replied sarcastically, playfully rolling your eyes. “A person who was actually looking out for me would tell me without wanting something in return, you know.” You pointed out. “Still grateful though. I have to ask, why were you interested in my cooking all of a sudden?”

“Hey, nothing comes for free.” Johnny said, shrugging his shoulders causally. “You’re welcome, by the way.” The American paused, humming as he pursed his lips. “Well, it started when I caught tattoo holding one of your meals. It looked delicious, he didn’t let me try though.” He let out a dramatic sigh. “And then Kung Lao began bragging that he’d get a full feast from you and well…” He shook his phone, and you connected the dots.

“I get it.” You said, nodding. You realized how long the two of you had been standing around for. You send him a small smirk and you let out a small laugh. “You could have just asked for food if you really wanted it, but I appreciate the help.” You admitted, before shrugging off his arm and walking ahead, gesturing for him to follow. “Now come on.”

“Wait, you would really?” Johnny called out after you, following you closely. He raised his eyebrows, scanning your face with a hint of suspicion. “Where’s the catch here?” He inquired, the suspicion leaking into his voice.

“You’ve known me long enough, Johnny.” You told him, looking over to him with an amused look. “There’s no catch. I don’t mind doing that kind of stuff for you guys.” You said, which was true. You wouldn’t mind doing anything for them as long as it made them happy. You always were too much of a people pleaser.

“Yeah, I should have known.” The actor said with a sigh. He rubbed the back of his neck, looking over at you. “You’re way too generous, you know that?” He told you, which led to you letting out a small chuckle of surprise. “Here, use this to stick it to Kung Lao, just give it back before we head out.” You caught Johnny’s phone when he tossed it over to you, then he jogged ahead.

You smiled as you held the phone. While he wasn’t the most protective over it, you still felt a sense of trust put in you due to you holding the precious object. With a little more pep in your step as well as the determination of a person with a vengeance, you walked over to Kung Lao, tapping his shoulder. You hid the phone behind your back as the man turned around.

“Yes?” The former farmhand inquired, sending you a confident smile. You had a feeling he was still feeling a bit smug after “winning” the bet. You let a slow smirk spread across your lips, then your eyes fell to look at his shirt. Your brain paused as you took a moment to stare at the dragon design on the left side.

Was that the same design as the necklace you were wearing? You wondered over that fact for a moment as you realized, yes…yes it was. Your smirk turned into a smile for a moment as you realized this. It felt…nice to be matching with him.

“I heard from a little birdie that you lied.” You said, breaking your gaze away from his shirt. Your smile turned into a smirk again. You watched as Kung Lao looked at you with pure confusion. “I’m referring to the bet that we had between us.” You clarified. Then, you watched as he sent a look over to Raiden, who simply shrugged.

“Me? Lie?” Kung Lao inquired, raising his eyebrows as he pretended to not know what you were talking about. He crossed his arms, his head tilting upwards. “Hah! I would never.” He said, his self confident front holding up. You would have believed it too, had you not witnessed the video that Johnny had given you.

“I wouldn’t lie Kung Lao, that’s not something neither I or the monks taught you.” You chided playfully. An offended look appeared on the man’s face, then it turned into surprise as you revealed the phone you had hidden behind your back. “Want to confess now? Or should I show the damning evidence I was so preciously given?”

“I…uh…” Kung Lao floundered, searching for an excuse to spin the tale in his favor. You assumed from the screen he already knew what the video was going to show. After a few moments, he sighed in resignation. “Okay. you got me.” He admitted, hanging his head. You nodded slowly, crossing your arms. “Sorry?” He said, giving a half apology with a small shrug with an apologetic smile. You let out a laugh.

“Apology accepted, though I thought you’d have more honor in a bet since you do it so much.” You pointed out, which prompted a somewhat guilty look from the man. “Don’t worry, I won’t make you do anything bad.” You told him, the wicked smile spreading across your lips said otherwise. You watched as Kung Lao looked like he regretted his actions, though you did hear him mutter under his breath he would definitely be getting Johnny back for this betrayal.

“I see we have all gathered.” Liu Kang spoke up, walking up to the group that gathered. His gaze swept over the group that you had gathered, an approving look on his face. You noticed Kenshi and Johnny walked up beside you, and you handed over the phone back to the actor. “It is time.” He told you all, leading you all into a pavilion.

Excitement filled you as Liu Kang began to summon the portal. From the corner of your eye, you watched as Johnny began to record the process. However, as the portal began to form, your excitement turned into a massive headache, and you let out a small hiss as you clutched your head. This was worse than any headache you’ve had recently.

“Are you okay?” Kenshi whispered, leaning towards you. He placed a hand on your shoulder. You looked over, trying to send him a convincing smile. He didn’t buy it, and a look of concern remained on his face as he looked at you.

“I’m fine.” You managed to say, your smile wavering as your head pounded with searing pain. “I just get massive migraines sometimes.” You lie, the same lie you’ve always used whenever someone that wasn’t Liu Kang caught you having these pains.

“I see.” Kenshi said, yet his hand remained on your shoulder as a source of comfort. He tried to send you a reassuring smile. It helped a bit, even if it didn’t alleviate the pain at all. His hand on your shoulder was doing more to help you. It felt like an anchor to the real world amidst all the pain. You leaned slightly towards the swordsman, allowing yourself to temporarily lean against him. He let you, his grip growing firmer.

The light of the portal flashed and pulsed, orange light shining on all of your faces. Had you not been in pain, you figured you would have appreciated how beautiful it was. But now, it just served to add to your nausea. You breathed in, trying to go through the pain. You could only hope it only got better.

“Outworld can be both alien and intoxicating to Earthrealmers.” Liu Kang spoke, and you forced yourself to focus on his voice to drown out the pain. “Do not become drawn in.” The fire god warned. You wondered briefly, if that extended to you. You nodded slowly, regretting it as it felt like you were beginning to sway. Kenshi righted you, using his hand to make sure you didn’t fall over. “You must focus on the task at hand.”

Soon enough, the portal was completed. With confident strides, Liu Kang entered the portal composed of pulsing and swirling orange energy. You followed in tow, Kenshi’s hand staying on your shoulder for only a few more moments to make sure you were alright before dropping. You bit the inside of your cheek and clenched your fists, trying to abate the pain.

You barely noticed Johnny pointing the camera your way. With a huff, Kenshi shoved the camera away, sending him a look. This made the actor send him a look of disbelief at the action. You managed to send the ex gang member a grateful look before you stepped to the otherside of the portal.

For a moment, you experienced nothingness. You couldn’t see, hear, feel, or sense anything in general. Then, there was a searing pain that engulfed your entire body. You tried to scream, but it was as if you lost your voice. It was as if your headache had spread across your form and had been multiplied by ten. Thankfully, it was only for a moment and then it disappeared.

It seemed the pain dissipating had taken the bulk of your headache, leaving you only with a dull discomfort. It was akin to a slight pressure in your head, nowhere near as bad. It was an annoyance, but it wasn’t unbearable anymore.

After a moment, you found yourself emerging on the other side of the portal. Your eyes widened as you looked around, wondering if anyone else had gone through an excruciating experience like you. As you watched their reactions, you realized they must have not. The others were immersed in the beauty of the world, and you doubted they would look as relaxed as that if they had gone through the same thing. So, you forced yourself to focus on the area around you

Gone was the desolate and war torn Outworld that your brain knew. Instead, you were greeted with a world full of beauty and life. You felt torn. You were happy it looked to be thriving as much as Liu Kang had told you. And yet, at the same time, you wondered if this world was going to be able to offer you anything useful to your past with how…different it was.

Still, you found yourself in awe of the area. It looked like a garden was surrounding the portal, which seemed to be integrated beautifully into the architecture. Whites, purples, and greens were the main color scheme of the area, giving it a regal vibe.

“Toto, I have a feeling we’re not in Kanas anymore.” Johnny remarked as he filmed the area, and you recalled when Johnny had put on that movie during one of the movie nights. You felt a bit happy that you could actually recognize one of his movie references.

As your gaze wandered from the area itself to what was in front of you, your eyes finally settled on two figures dressed in pink and blue respectively. They stood amongst dozens of guards, all notably women. On the stairs, there was a beautifully woven purple carpet. It vaguely reminded you of the red carpet Johnny had bragged so much about.

Your mind had a hazy realization that you recognized the two standing upon the steps. But through the dull pain, no memories popped up. You figured it was the result of too many memories trying to break free, much like when you had first trained the four champions.

“Oh my…are those?” Johnny Cage spoke, as the two figures approached, walking causally down the steps. He looked over to the group, assessing their reactions as he kept the camera facing forward. The others, predictably, did not share the actor’s sentiments.

“Empress Sindel’s daughters, yes.” Liu Kang replied, a hint of sterness in his voice. Taking that as your cue, you nudged Johnny, indicating to him to knock it off. Of course, the actor just sent you a pout. Liu Kang also looked back to send him a look.

“They do not disappoint.” Johnny continued to comment, earning another nudge from you. “Okay! Okay! I get it!” He hissed out. Your eyes landed on the guard closest to you. You and her made eye contact for a moment, which led to another feeling of familiarity hitting you. How many people would you meet that you knew previously?

“Please be respectful.” You told Johnny Cage, leaning towards him to whisper it in a discreet way. “We’re here as guests, and I’d rather not get on anyone’s bad side.” You said, giving him a pointed look. He sighed but nodded.

“Fine.” The actor agreed, holding back the childish urge to roll his eyes at your chiding. “Won’t stop me from at least admiring them, though.” Johnny relented, his gaze lingering on you for a few moments. He looked you up and down, much to your confusion before returning his gaze back to the Outworlders.

As you all stopped in front of the blue and pink duo, Liu Kang bowed. Quickly, everyone followed suit, replicating the gesture.You focused your attention on the duo, trying to work out who they were. They definitely looked familiar…and they seemed near identical.

Ah. While your memories weren’t popping up, you made the connection. Liu Kang had pointed out these were the princesses. The pink one must be the older one, Mileena…which meant the blue one must be Kitana. As you recalled their names, your brain seemed to buzz, the dull pain strengthening temporarily in intensity. It was as if memories were fighting to rise to the surface. You definitely knew these two before.

“Lord Liu Kang, welcome.” Mileena spoke, nodding her head. A cordial smile was placed on her lips, and her eyes seemed to assess the group in front of her. Her sister also seemed to scan the crowd, though a polite smile did not reach her lips. Instead, an analytical look was on hers. You assumed she was already trying to find who it was that was to fight Outworld’s champions.

“Thank you, Princess Mileena.” Liu Kang said, a warm smile on his lips. You watched as the guard that had been by the side strode over to be closer to the princesses. You concentrated on the princesses’ faces, trying to see if trying to force any memories would help clear your head. It didn’t. If anything, it just increased the pressure of the pain, so you stopped trying to do it.

“You remember my sister?” Mileena inquired. She leaned back, looking over to Kitana who looked back at her in acknowledgement.

“Of course.” Liu Kang replied. He then bowed once more. “Princess Kitana.” The other princess acknowledged his courtesy with a nod of her own. “May I introduce my companion,” The fire god spoke your name, and you bowed slightly, showing the same respect as Liu Kang did. “Johnny Cage, Kung Lao, Kenshi Takahashi, and Earthrealm’s champion, Raiden.”

“I hope you’re prepared, Raiden.” Kitana spoke this time. An air of confidence filled her voice as she scrutinized your student. “Our champions are determined to win.” She said, her gaze falling upon her sister. You knew very well that Mileena was supposed to be one of the champions, as told to you by Liu Kang. Liu Kang had put himself in charge of preparing the champion, since you’ve never seen the fighting prowess of the Outworlders yourself.

“None more so than me.” The older twin said, self assuredness in her tone. Her gaze was steady, almost as if trying to intimidate Raiden with it alone. “It’s been too long since we’ve known victory.” She reminded the group, and you could tell she was determined to be the one to reclaim it.

“Princess Mileena.” The guard you saw from earlier spoke up. There was a hint of urgency within her tone as she spoke. She had gone up the steps to get closer to the princess. “We should be on our way, Empress Sindel awaits.”

“Thank you, Tanya.” Mileena replied. The name Tanya struck a chord in you. That was definitely familiar as well. You couldn’t tell if it was a blessing or a curse that you would be in such close proximity with people you supposedly knew before. “Follow me, please.”

You all followed the trio of women, walking down a hall that was flanked by guards. Mileena was leading the group. At the end, a line of royal carriages awaited. You soon found yourselves been split up into small groups to ride the carriages. You were in the first group, along with Liu Kang, Raiden, and Mileena. The guard from earlier, Tanya, took the reins.

As the others slipped in, you considered where to sit. It wasn’t until the princess graciously gestured to the spot next to her that you allowed yourself to sit next to her. You didn’t want to be rude and assume, but you were grateful she didn’t seem to mind. You sat across from Raiden, with Liu Kang diagonally from you.

As soon as everyone boarded their carriages, the carriage line set off. It was preceded by a joyous Shokan who played the drums. It was quite nice to see a man so enthusiastic over his job. The other guards, the Umgadi you recalled, flanked the carriages as you set off. You watched with amazement as you passed through Sun Do. It was colorful and alive, and you awkwardly smiled and at the people who gazed at you from the streets. You weren’t used to being marveled like this.

The people on the streets were dressed up in bright garb, and vendors were going around trying to take advantage of the festivities and trying to sell more of their wares. You even spotted some Outworlders cheering as they toasted their mugs together.

“Those are Centaurians.” Raiden said, the wonder clear in his voice. Raiden also had excitement on his face, though you supposed it was due to the novelty of it all. He did not share the same feelings as you did at that moment. “And Shokan!”A wide grin spread across his face, and it was all too easy to match his. His energy was contagious.

“The six armed being as Naknadans.” Mileena informed, looking over the crowd. You wondered for a moment if she was simply informing him, or if the man, in his enthusiasm, had mixed up the Outworld races.

“The monks described them. But seeing them in person…” Raiden said, returning his gaze to Mileena to acknowledge her words towards him. He was unable to keep his attention on her for long, as he returned his attention back to the crowd soon enough.

“I see Her Majesty once again spares no expense on the festival.” Liu Kang remarks, having observed the colorful atmosphere in silence. You raised your eyebrows, now wondering how the city looked without all the festivities. Was it just as beautiful? Either way, it was certainly an upgrade from what you remembered previously.

“Should she not?” Mileena replied, and you looked over. She had an almost offended look on her face, which caught you off guard. “It commemorates my late father.” She said, and you took note of that. You remembered how Liu Kang had told you about the brief history of the royal family, including the unfortunate death of King Jerrod.

“I think it is a wonderful celebration in memory of him.” You spoke up, your gaze landing on the decorations that were among the people and buildings. You voice carried the admiration you held for the beauty of it all. “Her Majesty made the capital look so wonderful, it must be an excellent reflection of your father.” You felt the princess’ gaze land on you, and you turned to send her a friendly smile.

Whistles were blown, and you turned to look over your shoulder to gaze at whatever was causing it. You saw a woman standing in the street, in the way of the procession. It seemed she was leading other guards, who were notably dressed differently than the Umgadi. You watched as those people led off a few people who seemed to be handcuffed. Your eyebrows furrowed. Not at the sight, but at the slight haze you felt upon seeing her, too.

You wondered if you were bound to recognize a person every few minutes in this place.

Mileena knocked on the carriage frame, which prompted Tanya to stop the animals from continuing on. The princess whispered a small “excuse me” as she walked past you and Raiden, and hopped off the carriage. She strode over to the woman with what you assumed was thinly veiled frustration.

You couldn’t hear the conversation well, but you did overhear that she called the woman the first constable. You put two and two together that this must be the police force of Sun Do. She seemed to express anger towards the failed job of clearing the street. Then, the conversation was spoken in words too quiet for you to overhear. You turned back in your seat, to make it seem like you weren’t listening in on that conversation.

“Princess Mileena doesn’t seem to like her very much.” Raiden observed, his gaze on the two women. You nodded. Fromwhat Liu Kang had taught you, you already had put together why they had some sort of conflict, aside from the obvious hold up.

“Li Mei used to lead the Umgadi, the palace guard.” Liu Kang informed the champion, catching him up to speed. His glowing gaze drifted over to look at him. “It was on her watch that the Princesses’ father was murdered.” As the information settled in, the tension in the carriage rose. Soon enough, Mileena rejoined the group, though a bit more peeved.

Thankfully, the rest of the ride was peaceful and without any further hold ups. The tension dissipated as you watched the city fade away, and the palace came into view. The carriages stopped at the entrance, and you soon found yourselves being ushered away by the Umgadi into the palace. The princesses had disappeared in the midst, and you assumed they were simply getting ready for the upcoming event.

As you found yourself standing in the Great Hall of the palace, you stood next to Liu Kang, your students in front of you. Raiden was the one who was directly in front of Liu Kang, and you could tell his nerves were getting to him. His arms were crossed as his head tilted down, his hat concealing the stress that was obvious on his face.

“Worry expends energy for no reason, Raiden.” Liu Kang reminded him.

“But the tournament.” Raiden pointed out. Worry creased his brow, and you could sympathize with the burden he must feel being the only representative for Earthrealm within this tournament. His arms uncrossed as he stepped closer, looking at the fire god. “If I lose…”

“Just remember your training, Raiden.” You cut in, recognizing the signs of a spiraling mind. You gave him a smile, and Liu Kang did as well. “I told you already, you have the ability to win this tournament.” You reminded him of your words earlier. “As long as you focus on yourself, you will do fine. Worrying over a future that hasn’t happened yet will do you no good.”

Raiden looked at you, trying to soak in your words. His furrowed brow relaxed, and he tried to reciprocate the smile. It was a weak and weary one, but it was better than nothing. He seemed to be more confident now because of your words, even if it was just by a little bit.

The sounds of armor and the crowd whispers caught your attention. You looked over to see a horned man enter the hall. Your eyes met, and your eyes widened. It felt like the world was slowing down to a halt. Your heart thumped loudly in your chest, so loud you could practically hear the blood rushing in your ears.

Shao Khan.

Your body froze, and it was like the amulet all over again. The world around you swirled and faded, and you found yourself now atop a rooftop. The sky was hazy with a mixture of clouds and smog from the destruction of the world around you. Distantly, other buildings were set on fire. THo0se that weren’t seemed to be destroyed.

This was the end of all things.

You were on your knees, cradling yet another body in your hands. The smell of it all was terrible. The first thing you smelled was burnt flesh. It was sickening and made your stomach turn and twist. Then, you smelt ash from the fires all around you. You didn’t dare look down, your hands trembling as they felt burnt and scarred skin. That must be the main source of the burnt flesh smell.

To your left, you recognized hazily, Johnny Cage. He looked different, but you could recognize him all the same. To your right, you saw a woman whose name you only vaguely recalled as Sonya Blade. She was an ally? Surely she must be. Ahead of you, you could see Raiden in his thunder god form standing before the man whose name rang in your head.

Shao Khan.

Your head was pounding. All you knew was the massive destruction around you was because of the man. How it came to be, you couldn’t recall. All you knew was that it was because of him. Hate filled you, and you grit your teeth. Grief for things you didn’t quite remember clawed at your heart. You almost clenched your hands into fists, but then you remembered the body in your lap. Instinctively, you looked down. You wished you hadn’t the moment you did.

Liu Kang?

A wave of nausea filled you as you recognized the scarred and burnt body of the man in your lap. Thin scars trailed upwards his body, accompanied with gruesome burnt scars. One eye had even turned white from his injuries. Your stomach turned as you looked into his one good eye, and you realized with horror that it was already glazed over.

Death had already claimed the man.

“No.” You said, your voice quivering as you stared down at the man. Tears began to blur your vision, and your heart raced. How could this happen? This had to be a dream, an illusion. Anything but real. In your shock, you tried to shake him, hoping somehow he would wake up. All you felt was his warmth quickly fading away from you.

The voice in your head screamed. You’ve lost too many! But who had you lost? Looking down at the deceased in your lap, you wondered how many you’ve had lay dying in your arms. Did it matter how many had died?

You didn’t know. All you knew is that you were filled with a burning hatred for whoever did…this.

“You monster!” You cried out, standing up after you had carefully set down Liu Kang’s body onto the ground. You couldn’t recall who had done this, but you could only assume that Shao Khan had to be responsible.

Raiden turned back, shock on his face at your scream filled with pure vitriol. As you charged towards Shao Khan, hate fueling your body. you saw the thunder god trying to stop you. You ignored him. You would not let the thunder god prevent you from avenging those you have lost in this ceaseless war.

You leapt, claws outstretched as your teeth bared as a lion. Shao Khan merely chuckled at your attempt to lash out at him. You grunted as the man easily sent you flying back with his sorcery. As you fell, you transformed back into your human form. You tumbled onto the rooftop, hazily seeing Johnny and Sonya also being flung back as well. They landed near you.

You were powerless as you watched Raiden confront the tyrant. Was this the end?

“Red alert.” Johnny muttered behind you, snapping you out of your vision. You blinked, trying to ground yourself in the real world. You didn’t get a conclusion to the vision you saw, and you weren’t sure if you wanted to. What a horrible vision you had received. And yet, curiosity was clawing at you, what had happened? “Incoming stock villain.”

Was that the last thing you saw before you died and came into this life? Or was there more to the story?

“General Shao.” Liu Kang said, and you looked over at him. You felt a wave of relief as you looked at the fire god, knowing he was alive and not dead like you had seen. Still, the image was seared into your head. How cruel it was that the fire god had glowing white eyes, reminding you of the one white eye he had during his death. “Do not let him goad you.” Earthrealm’s protector advised Raiden, looking over to him. Then, he turned his eyes to look at you. His gaze turned perplexed as they did so.

You swallowed, quickly sending the fire god a smile. You must have left the look of worry lingering on your face far too long. That seemed to temporarily satisfy him as he turned his attention to General Shao, but the lingering stare he left on you left you knowing he would ask later.

With heavy footsteps, the man who your brain was screaming to maul approached. His eyes glanced over to you, an eyebrow raised before they stared back at Raiden. You were certain from that expression you were failing to hide the sudden hate you felt towards him. A mocking smile appeared on his face as he assessed the man. A condescending laugh left his lips.

“Hah, this is Earthrealm’s champion?” General Shao commented with a sneer. “I nearly thought it was that one.” He remarked, pointing a finger in your direction. You blinked in surprise at the comment. “That stare had resolve and determination to best me the moment I stepped in. Disappointingly, it appears you’re the champion.” His lip curled with delight. “So scrawny.”

“Would you care to test his strength!?” Kung Lao challenged Shao for his friend. He stepped forward with indignation. You leaned over with wide eyes and sent him a glare. You had to admit, you were holding yourself back from leaping at the general yourself, but for different reasons. This was neither of your guys’ battle to fight, though. “Raiden will-” Thankfully, Liu Kang stepped in to intervene.

“Will prove himself well enough.” Liu Kang spoke, finishing Kung Lao’s sentence for him. His hand hovered in front of Kung Lao’s chest to prevent him from stepping any closer. He stepped in between the champion and the general, acting like a barrier between the two realms. His gaze was unwavering in the face of the man.

“Have you still not told most Earthrealmers that Outworld exists?” General Shao inquired, his voice deep and gravely. His face held a look of judgement as he regarded the god. He was already looking down at him physically, and from the tone of his voice, it was more than just that.

“It is safer that way, General.” Liu Kang responded simply, not giving into his attempts to frustrate him.

“I suppose so.” General Shao said. He then took a step closer, trying to intimate Liu Kang, He leaned down, a belittling tone in his voice. “Your people’s frail minds couldn’t handle the truth.” You realized suddenly, that your hands were balled into fists. Crescent moon marks would be left permanently on the inside of your palm at this rate. You forced your hands to relax, and folded them behind your back. You held back a scoff at this poor attempt of intimidation.

“You presume them frail, General?” Liu Kang challenged. He raised his eyebrows at the Outworlder’s cocky attitude. “Should you…given how frequently they win this tournament?” The fire god pointed out, and you could tell he hit a nerve. The tension grew thicker, and it was as if you could cut it with a knife.

“We will destroy your champion, Liu Kang.” General Shao promised, his resolve showing through his voice. You could sense the hatred he felt for the god, not even bothering to use the honorific for him. He shook his head, his orange eyes boring into the demigod. “He shall taste no victory.”

Then he stormed off.

Minutes passed by, and more people filled the room. It was crowded. You offered light conversation to a random Edenian woman to be polite as you waited. You learned how excited she was to finally be able to watch the tournament in person, a sentiment you both shared. She was new to serving the throne, so this would be her first time. Although cautious, she even asked about Earthrealm, something you were glad to tell about.

Soon enough, you heard footsteps walking down from the hall, and the conversations began to cease. You sent an apologetic smile to your conversation partner that your conversation was cut short. You turned your attention to the trio of women who now entered the room.

Leading them was the woman who you presumed was Empress Sindel, the princesses following close behind. Your mind buzzed at the sight of her, and you began to wonder once more how many important people you once knew in your past life. Surely, it was not a coincidence you recognized many who seemed to be important in this life.

Who…were you?

The trio took confident strides, holding an air of regalness around them. You stood next to Raiden and Johnny, watching them walk through the hall towards their thrones. They walked up to their thrones before seating themselves comfortably, almost seeming to bask in the high regard that everyone held them in.

“Welcome, members of the royal house.” Sindel began to address the crowd, her gaze sweeping across the room. Her voice held authority, yet it also had a sense of warmth within it. “Welcome, our esteemed Earthrealm guests.” She said, nodding her head in the direction of your group. “We gather once again to honor my late husband’s legacy. To continue the tournament that he founded with Lord Liu Kang in hopes it would foster peace among the realms.”

A pained and sorrowful expression appeared on Sindel’s face, and you had sympathy for her. Losing someone close to you…while you did not experience it in this life, the memories that began to terrorize you reminded you of how heavy that loss can feel. You couldn’t imagine how much worse it must feel since the one she lost was her husband.

“May Jerrod’s soul watch over us with pride from its resting place in the Living Forest.” Your brain recognized the place, though last you recalled it was much more sinister. You wondered how it was now. A moment of silence was given in respect for the late King. “Lord Liu Kang.” Sindel addressed the god, who had walked over to the Empress. He stood at the bottom of the steps, looking up to her from her place on the throne.

“Empress Sindel.” Liu Kang replied, a smile on his face. “It pleases me once again to be your guest.” He bowed to the Empress, showing his respect for the ruler. Despite being a god, you admired how humble he was.

“Here, you are always welcome.” Sindel replied, her hands spreading out in a friendly gesture. The fire god lifted himself up to look at her once more. Crossing her leg, she leaned forward in interest. “Now, let us meet your champion.”

“Earthrealm’s champion is Raiden, Your Majesty.” Liu Kang introduced. You looked over to said man who remained rooted to the spot. You placed a gentle hand on his back to push him forward, having a feeling he was too stunned by his nerves. He felt stiff when you pushed him. “He has earned his place by embodying the very best qualities of Earthrealm’s people.”

“You seem nervous, young man.” Sindel observed, her eyes searching the younger man.

“I’m a stranger in an unfamiliar land.” Raiden said. “Here to compete against its greatest fighters. Yes, I am nervous.” He admitted with a nod of his head. You had to admit, even if it was foolish to admit weakness against these people, his honesty still made you smile. It was just part of his charm.

Never change, Raiden.

“As you should be.” The Empress acknowledged, though her tone was not condescending. If anything, it had a hint of encouragement behind it. “You have a difficult path ahead.” She stood up, and spread her hands out in a grand gesture. “It has begun!”

Those words felt so familiar to you. Has…this been the first tournament you’ve been to?

“As tradition requires, Outworld’s initial competitor will be Sun Do’s first constable.” Sindel announced. You looked over, hearing the sound of heels clack down the hallway. You recognized the woman approaching. It was the same person that Mileena had been admonishing. “Li Mei.” A determined look was on the woman’s face, contrasting the uncertain one Raiden whenever the tournament was brought up.

You glanced over to Raiden, trying to assess his reaction. It was as you expected. He still had that look of doubt and nervousness on his face. Yet, at the same time, you could see that same determination shining in his eyes.

“May she defend our realm’s glory as well as she preserves our capital’s order.” Sindel continued to speak, right until the first constable stopped right in front of the Empress’ throne at the bottom of the steps.

“Your Majesty.” Li Mei said, looking up to the ruler. She stood up straight and ready, and you could see the training she must have gone through as both an officer and an Umgadi in her stance alone. “I will honor both the royal house, and all of Outworld, with my kombat.” The officer announced, saluting the woman. A bold claim. Sindel descended the steps, placing a hand on the other woman’s shoulder.

Their conversation was too hushed for you to listen in. Well, you could listen in if you wanted to, but you figured it would be rude to do so. You also knew it would be very, very obvious if you transformed your ears to do so as well. But from your position alone, you could see hints of resentment within the Empress’ expression, barely visible under the guise of her veiled pleasantries.

You felt…pity for Li Mei.

“All you need do is your best.” Liu Kang told Raiden. He placed a hand on his shoulder as he regarded the champion. “The rest will take care of itself.” You placed a hand on Raiden’s bicep, looking at him warmly as you nodded.

“He’s right. You being here and having the courage to fight for Earthrealm makes me, and I’m certain Liu Kang as well, proud enough.” You encouraged him, squeezing his arm. Raiden sent you a smile as well. You could see how he was strengthening his resolve for his upcoming fight.

“Yes, thank you both.” Raiden replied, nodding. His gaze switched between both you and the fire god. But as you retreated with Liu Kang, you felt the champion’s gaze linger on you for just a few moments longer.

“Shall we see what you can do?” Li Mei challenged. She seemed more angry now, as if her determination had now been switched out with anger for the man. This made you wonder just what the Empress had said to her during their hushed moment. You clasped your hands together, staring at the duo as they conversed before their fight.

“Hopefully, this will be the first of many victories.” Raiden replied, his tone polite and respectful. You sighed. You knew it was part of his charm, but he seriously needed a lesson in verbally defending himself better.

“I will prevail, Earthrealmer.” Li Mei declared. Her eyes narrowed at her opponent. “This fight is more important to me than you will ever know.”

The fight began. It was intense. While Raiden was trained well, courtesy of you, the monks, and Liu Kang, you weren’t certain how he would fare against the Outworlders. After all, you knew they had much longer life spans than Earthrealmers, which meant they had more experience than what he could ever have.

Li Mei displayed great combat prowess. You could see how disciplined her technique was from the way she moved. She was relentless. She treated Raiden as if he were a threat, which he was. She did not dare underestimate her opponent.

Raiden, however, kept his calm. You watched as he showcased his newfound electric abilities. It was honestly a bit mesmerizing to watch, and you were immensely impressed by how fast he had mastered the new powers. It was as if he had them since birth, and you would have assumed so had you not been there to witness when he first got his powers. You just wished it came from anything else than that cursed amulet.

Still, despite the vigor that Li Mei had shown, Raiden was still able to best her.

“Thank you for the match, first constable.” Raiden thanked his opponent humbly. With grace, Li Mei stood up. You couldn’t ignore the despondent look on her face. She looked at the young man for a moment. Then, she bowed and then took her leave. You watched her walk off, and couldn’t help but to feel bad for her. The crowd began murmuring as she left.

“My compliments, Raiden, on a well fought match.” Sindel commended the Earthrealm champion. She then stood up, addressing the crowd. “We are adjourned until first light, I hope to see you all at this evening’s banquet.” She announced to everyone, then everyone dispersed.

“Congratulations Raiden.” You said, walking over to the champion. You watched as his eyes seemed to light up at your praise. You pat his shoulder, shaking it just a bit. “Keep it up, and I might just have to reward you when we get back to Earthrealm.” You said, half joking. And yet, the man looked at you with surprise, and there was just a bit of color on his cheeks.

“Really?” He inquired with a hint of surprise in his voice. He blinked as you nodded, thinking of what type of food to make the man. Perhaps a dessert this time? Victory did taste sweet after all. As the others came to congratulate their peer, you backed off to stand next to Liu Kang. You didn’t want to crowd the man.

“I could see your training techniques shining through.” Liu Kang said, looking over to you as he also let the others converse with Raiden. You looked at him, basking momentarily in the praise he was giving to you. Sure, nowadays the praise you received from the god was not rare, but it was delightful to receive all the same. “I could have not chosen anyone better to train him.”

“You’re too sweet.” You reply, feeling bashful at the praise. You looked downwards, before looking back at the small group. “I must admit, I’m surprised with how quickly he adapted to using that amulet.” You said, recalling briefly how he even used techniques the old Raiden had displayed. “You must have taught him well.”

“I merely guided him.” The fire god admitted, his gaze also on the champion. “In truth, it was he who had discovered those techniques himself.” He paused, his hands folding in front of him. “It was almost…natural for him.” There was a tone in his voice…nostalgia? You eyed him, not knowing what to make of the way he spoke.

Did he know more than he was letting on?

“I see.” You replied, uncertain of how to properly respond. Suddenly, you felt like you were hit with a wave of nausea. You stumbled forward, gripping your head. Liu Kang reached out, grabbing your arm to steady you. The throbbing in your head had intensified.

“Are you alright?” Liu Kang inquired, his voice dripping with concern. His eyes searched you, trying to see what was wrong. Wearily, you nodded your head. You swallowed, trying to will away the pain. You closed your eyes as you steadied yourself. He leaned in close, his voice dropping to a whisper. “Are you receiving visions again?”

“I’m fine.” You manage to get out, dancing around the question. “I…I just need some air. I’ll meet you at the banquet tonight.” You told him quickly, not certain what had suddenly befallen you. You hadn’t received any visions this time, just pain. You let out another hiss of pain. For a moment, you felt Liu Kang’s grip tighten, as if he wasn’t sure it was the right decision. Then, his hand let go of you.

“Take care of yourself.”

You nodded, quickly walking off in a direction, just wanting to get outside. You didn’t notice the eyes that fell on your retreating form. The hallways echoed with your footsteps, and you concentrated on the ground ahead, trying to retrace your steps to the front of the palace. You tried your best to ignore the Umgadi who seemed to stare at you curiously. They didn’t interfere though, seeing as you were just walking towards the outside. As you were met with the grand doors, you let out a sigh of relief as you quickly walked outside.

The fresh air was much needed. The intense pain in your head settled down. It was even more bearable than before, which was a much needed relief. Maybe being in there or witnessing all that had caused your head to be overwhelmed. You couldn’t tell, it was all too confusing. You walked forward and sighed, leaning on a railing that overlooked the city in the distance.

It was nice and peaceful out here.

“Ahem.” Jumping slightly, you looked over to the right and saw Li Mei standing out there. She looked awkwardly away, bowing her head as you looked at her. You had not even noticed her there. You looked at her, noting the puffy eyes and the tear stains on her face that you were able to barely see from her nearly hidden face.

Oh. You had interrupted a private moment.

You felt your face flush from embarrassment as you opened your mouth, not knowing how to respond. Unhelpfully, your mind finally granted you a brief memory of the woman before you. You remembered being friends, bonding over lost villages. You vaguely remembered a refugee camp. Well, none of that had been helpful to you in your current situation.

“I…um…sorry.” You managed to get out, turning your gaze away. Silence settled between you two, but it was far from the comfortable type that you were used to. Unable to bear the awkwardness, you spoke up again. “You fought well back there. I almost thought you would have won.” You admitted, fidgeting with your fingers.

“Thank you.” Li Mei said quietly, her voice hoarse. There was a tone to her voice which told you that your words did little to comfort her. She did lose still, after all. There was a moment where you heard her sniffles. Awkwardly, you searched your pockets, before you found a small packet of tissues. Good thing you carried those around with your medical pack. You held it out to her, who looked at it curiously before taking it. “Thank you…again.” She muttered, before using it. You nodded.

“No problem.” You said, the tension easing just a bit. “I’m not lying when I commend your fighting skills, you know.” You continued, your gaze dropping to look down at the waterfalls that decorated the palace. For a moment, you considered turning into a fish and swimming away to avoid this awkward conversation. You couldn’t just…leave her though.

“It wasn’t enough, though.” Li Mei responded, a hint of bitterness in her tone. She did seem to feel better despite this.

“I think that’s okay.” You say, shrugging. You realized what your words sounded like, and scrambled to clarify what you meant. “I mean that you did your best! And I think that’s commendable! It’s very much okay to be upset though!” You said, and you felt guilty as you watched the police officer just awkwardly nod. “Sorry, I’m not exactly the best at comforting people. I didn’t mean to interrupt your private moment either.”

“It’s alright.” The first constable said, her voice softer now as she fiddles with the rest of the packet of tissues in her hands. “I had been a wreck.” She admitted. She kicked her boot into the ground. “I don’t even know why I told you that, in all honesty. You’re a stranger.”

“Sometimes it’s nice to get things off your chest.” You offered an explanation, shrugging. “I don’t mind listening.”

“Are all Earthrealmers so trusting?” Li Mei inquired, changing the subject. You had a feeling she was not too trusting of you, which you figured was fair. Her stare lingered on you, a suspicious look on her face. You let out a small laugh.

“Not all, but there are certainly a lot of us who are.” You admitted. You looked over to the woman, nodding your head. “Sorry to intrude on your time, keep the tissues.” You apologized, bowing your head. You walked off, giving her one last final wave. You probably were making the situation worse by sticking around. “It was nice meeting you though, first constable.”

“It was nice meeting you too.”

You didn’t meet up with the others until later, taking the time to try and rest. Being away from people helped your headaches. You had found your room, which the Empress had so graciously allowed you and the others to have. Your room was quite quaint, and from your knowledge, it was fairly close to the hanging gardens, a place that had caught your eye.

Maybe you could take a walk around there later.

As you exited your room, you found yourself a bit lost, not knowing where to go exactly. Was the banquet to be at the hanging gardens? You vaguely recalled someone telling you that during the ride over, but your memory was failing you. You stood outside your door, deep in thought. You hardly noticed the footsteps heading your way.

“Lost?” A voice inquired. You looked up and noticed princess Kitana walking towards you. You blinked, surprised upon seeing the royal. You stared at her, feeling a memory pop up. She had a similar role in the past life. A princess trained in combat. There were a few more memories attempting to break through, but your head couldn’t make sense of it quite yet. You quickly realized that you had been staring. You bowed to her out of respect, which seemed to please her.

“If you’re lost, I can guide you to the royal banquet, if you wish.” The princess offered to you, a cordial smile upon her lips as she seemed to analyze you.

“That’d be appreciated, princess.” You said, accepting her offer. You followed her steps, matching her pace. She seemed a bit more friendly, than when you saw her earlier, even if it was just by a tiny bit. The hallways were filled with the echoes of your footsteps. You didn’t mind the silence, trying to dwell on the nagging feeling that you had. Why had you felt like you had seen her in your memories recently?

“Have you enjoyed your stay in Outworld so far?” Kitana inquired, peering over to you. You blinked, losing your train of thought. You hadn’t been expecting her to try and converse with you. You couldn’t tell if she was simply being polite or was actually interested in your thoughts. You just hoped it was the latter.

“I have, your realm is fascinating.” You admitted, reflecting on what you had seen so far. You were glad it was nothing like your memories. “It’s very pretty here. Where I come from, we don’t have sights like this.” You said, referring to both the life you currently lived and the one you remembered. “I’m fortunate to be able to witness this.”

“Indeed.” Kitana nodded. “Not many Earthrealmers get to witness the beauty of Outworld, much less in their prime.” You were momentarily puzzled by what she meant, then remembered that most perceived you as merely an Earthrealmer. You silently wondered if there were others like you out there, others who originated from other realms. You supposed not.

“It is a blessing.” You said, deciding to play along. Best not to raise any unwanted attention to your strange status. “Have you participated in many tournaments yourself?” You inquired, not knowing just how old the princess was. You assumed thousands of years, but just how many was something you weren’t quite sure of.

“Oh, I have participated in plenty.” The princess admitted nearly laughing at the idea. Which in all honesty, didn’t really give you any indicators to her age. She peered over to you, a thoughtful look on her face. “You are known as Lord Liu Kang’s companion, correct?” She inquired, tilting her head in your direction. You nodded, not sure where she was going with this. “What qualifies you to have such a high position?”

“Ah.” You said, realizing that many didn’t get the privilege of being called such a title. You weren’t sure if there even was someone who came before you who had the same title. You weren’t sure how to explain it, many didn’t question the title since it would be akin to questioning a god…but Outworlders were a bit more bold. “I’m not quite sure myself.” You lied. “I just help him with duties and training the champions.”

“I see.” Kitana said, though you could hear the curiosity in her tone. It was the type of curiosity which was not so easily quenched. “So you trained Raiden?” She inquired, her eyebrows raised. You nodded, and she seemed a bit surprised. “You two must be close.” She commented, which made you hum in thought. You nodded as you came to that conclusion as well.

“I guess we are.”

“We’re here.” She announced, and you found yourself outside where the Hanging Gardens must be. It looked wonderful at night and decorated. Not to mention, the smell of the food in the air was simply divine. She looked at you again, an amused smile on her lips. “You’re interesting, I would not mind talking to you again. Enjoy the feast.”

“You too!” You called out, feeling honored. You stared after her, your mind pulsing as it tried to remember desperately what role she had in your past life. You walked around the area, marveling at how the plants glowed in the cooler colors of the rainbow. You found yourself peering at the tables and found there were particular seating assignments. It didn’t take long for you to find your seat, and luckily you were one of the first there.

You were to be seated between Johnny and a person named Rain. You stared at the name, a faint recollection returning to you. The name was certainly familiar. The people to be across from you were Raiden and Liu Kang. You’d at least be among familiar faces. That, and you didn’t seem to be seated close to General Shao at all.

That was a relief.

Soon, people began to emerge from the palace and fill the area. The pressure in your head started up again, and you silently grieved over how you would not be able to enjoy this meal without at least a little bit of pain. With how strong the pressure was, you assume you would not be able to glean any new memories either. Still, you did not complain and sat down as the food was served.

Plates of delicacies were set before you, and as you peered at the cooked meat, you wondered if these creatures were the same ones as on Earthrealm. If there weren’t, you wondered if you could transform into it. When wine was brought about, you declined it. You were against the idea of becoming drunk, fearing your deepest secrets would spill from your very own lips.

You were not giving yourself the chance to sabotage the good things you had. So instead, you got some simple fruit juice.

You mostly indulged in the food presented to you, enjoying the difference in tastes. Mentally, you wondered if you could recreate these back at home. Now that would be something you could surprise Madam Bo with. You did listen in to the others conversations, but the one who you surprisingly ended up talking to the most was the man beside you.

“The Imperial Academy sounds wonderful!” You remarked, marveling at the story that Rain had indulged you in. He was much more friendly than you were expecting. When he had introduced himself as the high mage, you were intrigued immediately. You asked him about how he earned the title, and he informed you of his accomplishments. He seemed proud of his achievements.

“It is indeed.” He said, smiling your way. He nodded as he took a sip of the wine. “And you say Earthrealm has no schools of magic?” He inquired, an eyebrow raised at the words you had told him before. You nodded, chewing a piece of food.

“It doesn’t.” You confirmed, slicing the food on your plate to prepare another bite. “Magic is pretty foreign to our realm. It’s either a rare secret that is passed down through families, you are born with it, or you receive power from another object.” You explained, recalling the different ways that you knew people had received their special abilities. “I’m amazed magic is taught here.”

“I pity the fact that your realm doesn’t have the same privilege as our realm does.” He used your hands, eyebrows raising. “You mentioned your people rarely have magic.” You nodded, confirming what he heard. “Are you also magicless? Or are you part of the fortunate few to be blessed with those abilities?”

“I was fortunate to have those abilities.” You confirmed. Setting down your silverware, you held out your hand and transformed it into a bear’s claw. Rain’s eyes widened with fascination, and you felt proud of your little display of sorcery. “I was blessed to be born with animal shape shifting. I can transform parts, or all of my body at will to any animal I wish.”

“Fascinating. And you have not studied these abilities formally?” The high mage remarked, eyeing the transformed limb before you turned it back. “Your abilities remind me of another sorcerer in the royal court.” He said, piquing your interest. “He is busy with some duties, but I believe it would be of interest if you spoke with him.” He paused, looking at you once more. “Assuming you strive to learn about the limits of what you can do.”

“I am always looking to grow stronger.” You admit, and it seemed that something in your words struck a chord with the mage. His smile grew as he leaned towards you just a tiny bit more. “I wouldn’t mind conversing with this other sorcerer if he has similar abilities.” You say, nodding, taking note of the tip that he had given you. “What is his name?”

“His name is-” Rain began, but the conversation was cut short as he turned his attention to the front. You also turned to look, and noticed Empress Sindel had risen, holding her goblet in one hand. All of the conversations came to a halt as you watched the empress begin to give a speech.

“My husband Jerrod believed that the future of our realms lay together.” Sindel called out, a smile gracing her lips. Her attention traveled across the crowd. “Let us move forward in open dialogue, letting no secrets tear our bonds asunder.” You watched as everyone began to rise. Grabbing your own glass, you stood as well, raising it out.

“Your highness.” Raiden spoke suddenly, surprising you. “It’s an honor to be here and meet your people.” He looked around, his eyes landing on even the general who had shown him contempt earlier. “I can see there’s more here that joins us than divides us.” Despite the disapproving stare that you could see Shao was sending the champion, he only let out a small scoff.

Your distrust of the man grew, but at least he didn’t make an uproar.

“Well said, young man.” Sindel said, nodding in agreement to the little speech that Raiden had given out. Her smile grew as she lifted her goblet. “Now, let us enjoy the rest of the tournament together, in harmony, just as my husband would have wished.” With that, she lifted the cup to her lips and drank merrily.

With a cheer, everyone followed suit, taking a drink as their empress did. The rest of the feast ended quite well, with little to no issues as far as you were concerned. You had even conversed more with Rain, learning more about the magic culture that Outworld had been blessed with. He even offered to talk more another time, seeing your enthusiasm.

It wasn’t until you were in your room later that you realized that you had forgotten to ask what the sorcerer’s name was.

You couldn’t sleep.

That was to be expected. You always had trouble sleeping. Not to mention the fact that you were in an unfamiliar realm. Not to mention, when you tried to close your eyes, you could only see the lifeless body of Liu Kang. Your body was restless, and you paced back and forth in your room. You didn’t have a window here, the darkness only being abated by a simple crystal lamp.

You bit your lip as you tried to process all you had seen. You knew you definitely had a history with many people in Outworld. That was undeniable. Your memories only occurred when you encountered people you had at least known and talked to. It would be hard to try and figure out what your connection to all of them were though, since you would either have to stay around here for a prolonged period of time, or have private moments with them.

Somehow, you were more likely to encounter the latter, seeing how your time here was limited.

You sighed as you recalled the chilling vision of the general. Obviously, he had been some sort of villain previously. But was that still true? Your previous memories with Bi-Han had also been unpleasant. Maybe Shao was just an asshole? You weren’t certain, you hadn’t seen enough of him. But then again, you weren’t sure if you wanted to see any more of him.

With a sigh, you soon found your hand hovering over the handle of your door. Would it be weird to go and see if you could explore the palace? You figured that it would be considered off, and maybe even suspicious. They’d surely accuse you of trying to try and steal something. Maybe you could just explore the gardens. It’s not as if you could steal anything there.

That, and you weren’t sure if you could stand being in this room anymore.

You exited the room, slinking quietly into the hall. You masked the sounds of your footfalls, remaining quiet as possible to try and not disturb the others around. Sure you were restless, but you did not want to wake the others from your own energy.

“Where are you going?” A voice inquired, seeing you come down the hall. You walked closer, squinting to make out the figure. Ah, it was Tanya.

“I just walked to go on a walk.” You explained, hands up. “I’m rather restless, and the time difference between here and Earthrealm is great.” You gestured to the hall where you recollected the hanging gardens were. “I understand that it is late, but I merely wish to tour the hanging gardens, it looks beautiful at night.”

“Is that all?” Tanya inquired, assessing you with a hardened stare. You nodded, not minding how she glared at you. You knew she was only doing her job. She circled you, her gaze akin to a hawk. “Fine. I’ll escort you there.” She said, her tone cautious. You smiled gratefully at her for her generosity.

The walk there was silent, and unlike Princess Kitana, she offered no dialogue. Still, despite your gaze forward, you knew she was watching you closely. You didn’t mind, just wanting to go to the gardens. A memory began to surface, and you remembered a much different woman. One who sought to reclaim the glory of Edenia, a land that was once lost. How different she seemed now. Your mind did not buzz as much after, so you assumed you did not know her that much in the previous life.

“I’ll be here to make sure you don’t try to sneak in.” Tanya informed you once you two arrived, being transparent with her intentions. Her gaze narrowed as she scanned you up and down. “Do not try anything, Earthrealmer.” She warned.

“I promise I will not.” You said sincerely. Her gaze did not waver, but she did nod approvingly before turning away, letting you roam the gardens.

It was as breathtaking as before. The night sky was tinged with a hint of purple, and the night sky was so clear, letting the stars shine down on you. You briefly wondered if those same stars were the ones that those in Earthrealm would see.

Were Tomas, Bi-Han, and Kuai Liang looking at the stars too, wondering how you were?

The plants around the area flourished with life, and the smell was simply divine. You still couldn’t get over how they had a natural glow. You were tempted to reach out and touch the flora, captivated with their looks. You figured that was rather rude though, so you held back. You did allow yourself to lean in and smell the flowers.

In the midst of your fascination, you did not look ahead, and soon found yourself bumping into a figure.

“Sorry!” You instinctively apologized as you backed up. You shook your head to see princess Mileena. She looked at you with a mixture of frustration and confusion. You offered her a weak smile, and you were granted a memory. A ruthless woman with orange eyes and sharpened teeth meant to tear into flesh instead of lips. She was a clone, not a twin.

Was this really the same person?

Quickly remembering your manners, you bowed to Mileena, who watched you closely with narrowed eyes. Your mind still buzzed, and you knew you must have a deeper past with her.

“What are you doing out here, Earthrealmer?” She quickly inquired, her eyes watching you with distrust. You held up your hands as you backed up, trying to display that you were not a threat. Irritation was evident, but you had a feeling that the origin of it was not related to you.

“I was just touring the gardens.” You quickly explained. “I couldn’t sleep. Tanya, one of your Umgadi, helped escort me out here.” You added on. You noted how she seemed to relax a bit upon the mention of the guard. She nodded, though you can sense she was on edge.

“I see.” The princess replied, her lips pursed. “Cause no trouble then.” Mileena instructed, then began to walk off. You sensed she was still mad about something, but what you could not fathom. You swallowed, and before you knew it, you opened your mouth.

“Wait!” You called out, turning to look at her. She halted, though did not turn around. “Would you like to hear a quick story?” You offered. Perplexed, she turned and looked at you. Her eyes scanned you, her eyebrows furrowed, clearly confused by your sudden offer. There was a moment of silence, and you wondered if it was presumptuous of you to have offered. You knew you were a people pleaser, but perhaps trying to offer something like a story to royalty was too far.

“What type of story?”

“I did not know Earthrealmers could have such fascinating adventures.”

“Well, it’s mostly a tale.” You said, smiling at the princess. You had recounted a movie that Johnny Cage had shown you. You did not know why you did this, but it didn’t sit right with you to see Mileena so upset. She was much more relaxed, the irritation that had rolled off of her in waves dissipating as you had told her of the stories.

“Still, the imaginations of your people are…intriguing.” Mileena looked down at her folded hands, a conflicted look on her face before she sighed. “Tell me, why tell me such things?” She inquired, her eyes narrowing towards you. “You do not seem the sort to randomly spew stories, unlike one of your other companions.”

“I thought a story might help.” You replied honestly. “You seemed, and forgive me for being blunt, stressed, princess.” You swallowed as you looked towards the stars. The princess in front of you was much different than you memories had shown. That was good. “I often know distracting myself from my troubles sometimes helps.”

“I see.” Mileena said, and you heard her shift as she looked away. “I suppose you have good instincts then.” She admitted, though you could tell she felt awkward that she had been read so easily. She paused as she seemed to ponder over something. “Are you often up this late?”

“Unfortunately, yes.” You tell her, crossing your arms as you recalled the many other sleepless nights you had. It was rare you ever went to sleep as expected. “Walks often help clear my mind, so that’s why I went out into the gardens.”

“If you are to be up this late, then I suppose we’ll see each other more often.” Mileena said, and you looked at her in surprise. “I would like to hear more of your tales, they amuse me.” You smiled at her nodding.

“I would be honored to be of service.” You tell her, bowing once more. Mileena looked at you in approval, seeming to enjoy the way you held her in high regard. It was a breath of fresh air compared to her conspirators.

“Meet me here tomorrow, then.” She instructed. She began to walk off, before pausing once more. “Good night…” She spoke your name, testing it out. Your smile grew wide as you waved at her, feeling satisfied that you had helped her from whatever had irritated her.

“Goodnight, princess.”

Taking another moment to yourself, you let out a sigh as you turned your face to look at the purple skies once more. Despite the oddities of Outworld, so far your stay here has been quite…nice. A soft breeze passed, and you smiled.

Maybe you did belong, just a bit, in Outworld.

part twelve

tagged: @zhivaxo @koisuko

335 notes · View notes

ec1ips3 · 1 year

Text

-;༉‧₊˚✧ 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐨𝐧𝐞’𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐦𝐞

⚡︎ pairing: jj maybank x fem!reader

⚡︎ summary: you and jj aren’t friends, the thought of being friends felt so foreign. after some arguments, boy troubles, and years of yearning and aruging, the idea doesn’t seem so foreign.

⚡︎ warning: angst, mean jj, you’re a kook, i know that’s clique but i love kook!reader, swearing, she/her pronouns, not proofread, underage drinking, cheating, abandonment issues mentioned, mention of blood, fluff if you squint.

⚡︎ word count: 21, 284

⚡︎ a/n: hi everyoneeee! hope you’re all doing amazing. I decided to write some jj in honor of the new outer banks season i have yet to watch (because of jiara). also i’m guessing this takes place before season 2 because no cleo :(. BUT there is always a next time :). Also im sorry this is so long, i kept writing and i just kept adding and adding and adding, got too into it. also sorry this was late, but it’s okay because i think i wrote the best kissing scene i’ve ever written. Anyway like always, requests and taglist are always open. happy reading! <;33

masterlist | jj’s masterlist | taglist

“If you do it like that, you could break it” JJ complained.

“JJ, I did it the exact way you do it, get over it” You respond.

“Can you two stop acting like children?” Kie pleads.

You and JJ never got along. There was no real valid reason, not that you know of. You started hanging out with the pogues when Sarah and John B got together. She insisted one day you come with her so she actually has someone to talk to because there was still tension with Kie. You agreed because you wanted to help her, but one time turned into a second visit, then it became going every time Sarah went, or when Kie had called you to come over.

It wasn’t like you stepped on JJ’s foot when he was younger, or that you acted cruel towards him like all the other kooks. JJ Maybank just hated you. Your face, your smile, your voice, your presence. He hated you. And he always made sure you knew he hated you.

JJ would always pick up stupid little arguments about anything. If you reacted in any sort of way he didn’t like, you wouldn’t hear the end of it. If you wanted to surf you were told you didn’t know how to. And you always fed into it.

“Y/n please, you two have been going at this all day on hms pogue,” Sarah says rubbing her head, hoping to soothe her headache from the arguing.

“I’m curious JJ, what is my place here? Kook Princess?” You remind yourself of JJ’s comment earlier.

“You may be all high and mighty in kooklandia, but here, you’re a bottom feeder”

The both of you continue to argue, everyone on the poor boat having to listen to the both of you go back and forth. In the beginning, you ignored JJ and his remarks, he was furious when Sarah brought you the first time. He was already unhappy when John B brought one kook princess, but another one was his limit.

You understood why JJ didn’t like you at first, you were a kook, people that treated people like him like garbage, he didn’t know who you were as a person.

But as you slowly showed up more often, JJ just seemed more annoyed with you. He hasn’t even tried to have one genuine conversation with you, he’s never said anything remotely nice to you, and he hasn’t made any friendly gesture towards you. After a while, you had reached your own limit. You were no longer able to just sit and frown as he said mean things to you, you started to defend yourself.

When John B finally docked the boat at the Chateau you were the first one off the boat thanking him once you landed and walking straight into the small house. You were hoping that Sarah or even Pope had been the one behind you but you knew it was too good to be true when you heard his voice again.

“Where do you think you’re going?” he asks following you.

“I’m getting away from you so you could stop annoying me” you roll your eyes.

“I wasn’t done talking to you,” JJ said.

“I was,” you say, plopping yourself on the couch, massaging your temple from the headache JJ had caused you.

“J, just let the girl be” Pope defended you, sitting next to you.

“Are you seriously on her side? When she was pulling the anchor chain, she was pulling it too close to us. She would’ve had to get us a new boat” JJ reminds him as everyone else walks in too.

“Like you wouldn’t have liked a new boat with my money” you grumbled.

“You mean daddy’s money,” JJ said.

“JJ” Kie called him out.

“Am I wrong? It isn’t even her money. It’s the money daddy gives her. She doesn’t even do anything for it, she just has it” he continues.

“Oh, shut the fuck up JJ. You never stop talking about me or my family for more than 10 minutes” you stand up, visibly getting angrier.

“Yeah right kook princess, just like how you never-”

“That’s enough!” John B cuts Jj off before he could finish. The room was now silent.

It always annoyed John B and Sarah how much you and JJ argue. JJ was like John B’s brother just like you’re just like Sarah’s sister. Seeing two people they loved argue really ruined their moods and sometimes they even had arguments about the two of you arguing.

It wasn’t like John B didn’t like you, he did really like you. When Sarah would show up to a pogue thing, he would always ask for you, you were really easy to talk to, and you always looked out for him and his friends. JJ included. There were times when you had to pay for things for everyone, times when John B needed a little extra money for food, and even having to bail JJ out of jail. And you were always there to help and talk.

JJ liked Sarah. That was it. She makes John B happy and that’s all that really matters to him. She always treats his friends right and makes them happy too. JJ is started to warm up more to Sarah and is beginning to have an actual conversation with him now. His only problem with Sarah is that she brings you around.

“I’m so sick and tired of the arguing today. Pope, JJ, and I will stay here. Ladies, do whatever you want, I don’t care. Just take her, away from him and we will all be happy” John B points to you and JJ when he says your name, his arms folded once he’s done.

“Yes! That’s a great idea. We could eat at the Wreck. I’m starving” Sarah jumps in, looking at you with the hope that you’ll agree.

“My dad did ask about you last time,” Kie told you, trying to convince you.

You didn’t need convincing. The second John B had said you and JJ needed to be apart, you would’ve done anything.

“That isn’t fair. I’m hungry too” JJ complained.

“I will gladly leave,” you say.

“Perfect” Sarah sighs, walking to John B as a Bye and see you later.

You wave to Pope and John B who wave back, not indicating if you were coming back or not. The three of you left in Sarah’s car as she was the one who picked you up and drove to the Wreck.

The minute you stepped foot into the vehicle, there was a large weight lifted off of your shoulders. And when you stepped foot into the restaurant, your entire mood changed from annoyed to happy. Maybe it was the atmosphere, but Sarah and Kie are convinced it’s because you are now completely away from JJ.

The three of you strike up a random conversation, you not wanting to even think about the boy who changed the mood for you. After Kie gets your table’s food from the kitchen and you’re all eating is when someone just had to bring him up.

“Maybe you were just hangry when you had that argument with JJ” Sarah starts, and you roll your eyes.

“Or maybe, JJ is just annoying”

“She isn’t wrong, JJ is very annoying” Kie backs you up.

“Yeah but, Y/n. It’s JJ. You can always ignore him” Sarah says.

“If I ignore him he thinks it’s okay to do it. When I talk back he still thinks it’s okay, but he knows that I’m able to defend myself. That within himself already angers him” you say, sipping on your drink.

“I don’t know, maybe you guys just need to have sex,” Kie says plainly.

“Kie!” you and Sarah say at the same time.

“I’m serious. What if all this fighting is just both of you sexually frustrated with each other? Instead of taking each other’s clothes off, you argue with each other” Kie explains herself.

“I would rather get gum in my hair,” you say, biting a fry.

You would be lying if you said you didn’t find JJ attractive. Hell, everyone in, even Rafe did.

Before you met him, you just liked to look from afar. When you did, you thought maybe if you were nice enough something would blossom. But nothing ever did, just hatred towards you. Maybe that’s why you never could actually hate JJ as much as you disliked him. Maybe it’s the way he laughs, the way he shakes his head like a dog when he gets out of water. Maybe his pretty privilege gives him a pass.

“Her idea doesn’t actually sound too bad,” Sarah says as she thinks about it more.

“Sarah!” you say.

“Think about it. What if one day you and JJ just fuck, do you think you’ll continue to fight?” Sarah asks.

“I don’t want to think about fucking JJ, thank you very much” you respond, going back to eating. After that statement and a few laughs from the table, Sarah strikes up a new conversation.

Kie took this time to take other tables, every 20 minutes going back to your table to include herself in the conversation. As she was sitting this time, she noticed something, or rather someone.

Kie kicked your food under the table.

“Ow. What was that for?” you complain.

“Don’t look now but that guy behind you is totally checking you out” Kie says, still looking at the guy.

You did the only thing any reasonable person would and looked back, Sarah following suit. When you looked back a boy was looking at you. With light brown hair and blue eyes, he blushed and looked at his friends after you looked at him. He was really cute, like really really cute.

“I told you not to look back” Kie laughed.

“Yeah and I’m glad I did anyway. He’s cute” You say.

“You could always just, talk to him. Maybe get his number” Sarah suggested.

“Yeah right, he’s probably some guy that’s staying for the weekend, I’ll pass. Can you take me home now” You look at Sarah, her eyebrows knit together.

“You aren’t coming back?” she asks, you shake your head.

You were having a good time, going back to where he was would just ruin your mood. So to not risk it, you wanted to go home.

“To spare everyone from an even harder headache, I’ll stay home. I have things to do anyway” you say.

“You mean binge-watch ‘You’ and obsess over Joe Goldberg again” Kie calls you out.

“I can fix him” you respond.

“He’s a serial killer!” Kie responds

The table laughs until Sarah finally agrees, Kie going with her to drop you off at home. You do exactly what Kie said you would do, it’s a little boring but, it’s better than arguing with someone.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ｡･ ───

You’re scrolling on your phone when you hear your doorbell ring frantically. Since no one else was home, you take your phone with you as you quickly run down the stairs to open the door. When you open the door, you weren’t expecting Kie.

“Y/n, you have to come. Sarah got stung by a jellyfish” she said frantically

“Wait what, how? Why are you even here shouldn’t you be-” Kie cut you off before you could even finish your sentence.

“She wants you to pee on her. Just put on your shoes and come!” Kie tried pulling you out of the door but you took a step back. “Give me a second,” you said quickly getting your shoes from the side and holding them in your hand until you get in her car.

Kie drove you to the Chateau when she held your hand to the back you already saw Pope and John B on HMS Pogue.

If John B was here, why did Sarah need you? “Wait, John B? Where’s Sarah?” you ask, getting on the boat, Pope holding your’s and Kie’s hand.

“She’s on her dad’s. But she insisted we leave to get you to pee on her” John B explained.

“But you’re literally her boyfriend” you respond, confused.

“She said something about how ‘boy pee is dirtier than girl pee’” Pope said, you rolled your eyes. That is something Sarah would say.

Eventually, John B pulled up next to Sarah’s boat. JJ was nowhere to be found, you had assumed he would be on the boat with Sarah to keep her company. But it was only her and her painful moans in the water.

You get on Sarah’s boat and you try to lift her, “Y/n, you’re here to pee on me” Sarah said cheerfully.

You rolled your eyes, “I’m not peeing on you Sarah, I’m taking you to the doctor which should’ve been done when you first got stung” you said, sending daggers to John B’s eyes.

“But you know that you can pee on someone to take the stinging away,” Sarah says leaning against you.

“I don’t even think that’s true but whatever helps you sleep at night,” you say walking to the edge of the boat so John B could take Sarah, who gracefully does his job.

Once you hand Sarah off you hear banging, and when you look back the cockpit door is moving rapidly. The loud banging with the moving door only makes you more confused.

“Sarah… Is there someone here?” you ask, expecting some sort of answer. But all you heard was the motor and silence. “Sarah?” you look back where John B’s boat should be but it isn’t there.

Your eyes go wide, you see them slowly boat away. “Sorry Y/n, I still love you!” Sarah called out from the boat. She still loves you? What does she mean by-

You couldn’t even finish your thought before the cockpit door opens, but someone comes out quickly. When you see the familiar blond hair you want to curl into a ball and never come out again.

JJ notices you, his eyes wide. He mumbles something under his breath before he goes to where you are and looks at his friends. “What the fuck?!” He yells at them.

“We’re tired of the arguing! We’ll come back in the morning for the both of you” Kie said.

“You’ve gotta be kidding me” you groaned.

JJ looked at you for a second, then back at his friends. He groans loudly, louder than you which already annoys you.

“They’re kidding right, they’re not actually gonna leave us here?” you ask him, JJ just rolls his eyes at you. “Yeah dumbass, they are. We did it to Kie and Sarah once” JJ told you, he sighed and walked away from you, pinching the bridge of his nose.

You suck your teeth and look where your friends were. But when you felt the familiar something in your shorts you squealed loudly. JJ looked back at you to see what made you so excited. But when you pulled out your phone that was when he got angrier.

“It isn’t gonna work,” JJ tells you.

“You don’t know that Sarah’s boat should have wifi”

“I do know that and she doesn’t. Remember she said something about how it never works when it’s away from her house.” JJ rolled his eyes.

When you stood up and raised your phone in the air you cursed yourself. He was right, it wasn’t working. You remember Sarah and Kie laughing about when the pogues did it to them. You had hoped that maybe this would help you and JJ. With that being said instead of trying to make an actual conversation with you, JJ pulls a joint out of his pocket, lights it up, and puts it to his lips before he could even offer it if you wanted.

Even if you rejected his offer, it would’ve shown he was actually trying. You roll your eyes and go down to where you and Sarah usually sleep when you sleep over on the boat. If he wasn’t going to make the effort, why should you? You thought.

You entertained yourself with the games on your phone that didn’t need wifi for a couple of minutes. Then minutes turned into hours when your phone died and you hadn’t seen JJ since you left him. You know he’s hungry because you’re hungry so as much as you dread it, you decide to put an end to the arguing.

You took some chips out of your and Sarah’s secret stash and left the small room. When you walk out the first thing that hits your nose is weed. You walk to the middle of the boat just to find him on the edge of it, smoking a joint, looking in the distance. You walked a little harder so JJ could recognize you were around, and he did, looking back at you. You threw him the chips.

“I know you’re hungry, consider this a piece offering,” You say, opening your bag and taking out a chip to bite.

JJ just looked at his chip bag and scoffed, he threw it back at your feet. “I don’t want it,” he said lowly. You roll your eyes, of course, he’s acting like a child.

“Look, I don’t want to do this as much as you but we should at least give it a try. Us arguing is ruining our friendship with everyone else.” You explain to him

JJ laughed loudly, “you mean you’re ruining your relationship with everyone”

“Excuse me”

“You heard me. Maybe if you weren’t so annoying you wouldn’t be ruining those friendships, but you are” JJ says

You’re speechless for a second thinking of what to say before you actually say it. “Last time I check JJ it takes two people to hold an argument. I’m not the only annoying one”

“Sorry, Princess but that’s all you. Maybe if you didn’t act like a kook you would be able to realize how annoying you are”

“Is that the only reason you don’t like me? Because I’m a kook? That’s real childish of you, JJ”

JJ stood up at the word childish, getting close to you. “Then so be it, but at least I act like my true self,” he says

“What are you even talking about? I didn’t ask to be a kook, I can’t control that” you defend yourself.

“Yeah but you control who you choose or who not to be friends with,” JJ says, venom rolling off his tongue.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” you knew exactly what he meant, you just wanted him to say it.

“You’re a princess who lives in this big castle, everyone caters to you. You can do no wrong, everyone loves you. But you chose to befriend the ones everyone looks down upon. It’s fucking weird and fake” JJ says, raising his voice slightly.

“So you hate me because I’m friends with your friends instead of some random kooks?”

“No, I hate you because you are you. You’re a spoiled brat who uses daddy’s money to get closer to us. You act so innocent like you don’t know what you’re doing but you do! I don’t know why you’re friends with us Y/n but I know that when Daddy is no longer upset at you, you’ll go crawling back to your kook friends” JJ said, every word he said hurting you slightly more, and more.

“You don’t even know me,” you say angrily.

“And I don’t want to. Think about it. When it was just Sarah, everything was perfectly fine. No one was ever begging someone to stop arguing, we were always happy and laughing. That all changed when Sarah decided to bring you around. You changed everything!”

You were speechless, your mouth slightly wide, your eyebrows furrowed together. JJ has never yelled at you once, so seeing him do it now only made you feel pain. To think you actually liked this guy, to think you tried to befriend him. And all of it was for nothing.

JJ took your silence as an opportunity to go further. “You changed everything! And you changed everything for the worse! Do you actually think we enjoy being with you? Do you really think Pope doesn’t care when you ask him multiple questions? Do you really think Kie doesn’t hate it when you bring up something from the kook academy? Do you really think John B likes you? He only puts up with you because of Sarah. They all only put up with you because of Sarah! So get a grip, stop trying to be my friend, and leave my friends alone!”

The sound of his echoes was the only thing heard. Your eyes began to water. You knew he was wrong, if he wasn’t they would’ve all said something to you or Sarah. But there was a small part of you that believed him.

JJ had only realized what he said once he noticed your entire face go pale. Like all the life and the spirit you had in you was gone instantly. He felt bad, he didn’t mean the words he said. He was angry, he wanted you to stay away from him. He never wanted to ruin you, when he first saw you, that was his one wish for himself. But he did it anyway.

“Y/n… I’m sorry I didn’t- I didn’t mean it. I- I was just saying-”

“It’s okay, I get it,” you said softly, it’s so soft and quiet. He’s never heard you be this quiet and he never wants to hear you this quiet ever again.

“No, this isn’t-” he took a step closer to you and you took two steps back. “Y/n…”

You wipe the tears that fall, “I’m gonna go back inside the cabin. Have a nice night JJ” you said even quieter than before.

“I’m sorry. Y/n I didn’t mean any of it, you gotta believe me” JJ pleaded with you. You couldn’t look him in the eyes, you knew if you did you would only cry more.

“Yeah JJ. I believe you” you said, looking at him for a second, just a second. Once you do you quickly turn away, walking to the cabin.

JJ didn’t stop you, he wanted to. He didn’t want to make you cry, he never wanted to even see you cry. He ran his fingers through his hair and grabbed the ends of it. He felt like an idiot. He sat down, the unopened bag of chips next to him. He looked at it and shook his head, getting angrier with himself.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *. ☽ .* :☆ﾟ｡･ ───

The sunlight fell onto your face, waking you up. Your eyes were tired from all of the crying you did last night. You had a massive headache. Your voice felt so small. Everything from last night made you want to go back to sleep and stay in that cabin for the rest of your life, but you knew that wouldn’t be possible.

You walked out of the cabin and saw a small bag of chips at the door, the bag of chips you gave him. You throw it back into the cabin and you didn’t even try to look for him. You were on the edge waiting for your friends to come back.

You finally saw a small white dot in the distance, sighing with relief. But that sigh was too soon because you felt the new presence behind you. The HMS Pogue was getting closer and neither of you said a word. Not until it was almost there that JJ had broken the silence.

“I’m really sorry Y/n. I shouldn’t have said any of those things to you because they all aren’t true.”

You stood up and looked at him, “it’s okay JJ. You won’t have to worry about me anymore” you say, looking at the HMS Pogue.

“What?” his blue eyes filled with confusion.

“I’ll stay away from you and your friends. Just so everyone can be happy like they were before me”

“Y/n” was all JJ said when he heard Kie’s voice.

“Did everything go as planned?” she asked. The both of you were silent.

You had climbed down to the HMS Pogue with the help of Pope, both you and JJ silent as ever.

“Guess not” John B mumbled, climbing onto Sarah’s boat with Sarah.

“Why are you getting here?” JJ asked.

“Well, I need my boat back. So John B and I were gonna drive it back to my house and Pop was gonna take the pogue boat and drive to my house in the twinkie to pick us up. You can join John B and me if you want” Sarah offered JJ.

He looked at you who was looking at the ground below you. So quiet you were. JJ nodded, walking away from the edge of Sarah’s boat.

“Pope, can you drive me home before you pick them up? My mom is probably freaking out about where I was last night” you ask him, your eyes soft and the presence you held within them so small.

“Uhm, yeah. Sure, Of course” Pope nodded, starting the HMS Pogue.

“Uh, we’ll see you guys later,” Kie told John B and Sarah.

“See you later,” Sarah said, but she only looked at you.

The boat ride to the Chateau was the quietest it’s ever been in. You, Pope, and Kie got in the twinkie shortly after docking and just like he said, Pope took you home first. Not without a bye of course.

When you walked into your house, your mother was already waiting for you in the kitchen. After your long minutes of scolding and your punishment of not going outside unless asked to for a week, you went to your room. To do what you did in the cabin. Cry your eyes out.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *. ☽ .* :☆ﾟ｡･ ───

The week’s punishment wasn’t bad. You actually enjoyed it. You had an excuse for Sarah and Kie when they asked to hang out. But once the week was up you gave every excuse in the books to not go. You told JJ you would stay away from them, and you are.

You would be lying if you said it wasn’t lonely, it was very lonely. You were so used to being with them almost every day that now your day just feels empty. And poor Sarah. You would talk to her every day, there wasn’t one time when you weren’t with or texting her. You didn’t tell her what happened on the boat after she asked. You didn’t want their image of JJ to disappear.

JJ was also going through it. Ever since what happened on the boat JJ was quieter than usual, it made the rest of the pogues worry. He also hadn’t told them what happened on the boat mainly because he knew you weren’t going to.

Every time the pogues brought you up JJ just felt guilty. He knows he is the reason why you aren’t showing up anymore, and in a way, the pogues know it too. JJ didn’t know what to do, he wanted to talk to you but he didn’t know if he should actually go to your house. He had a feeling you would just ignore him and tell him to leave. JJ felt helpless, he didn’t know how to clean up the mess he created.

When you woke up this morning you did your usual routine, mainly just sulking. When you went to eat your breakfast though your mom asked to run some errands for her. You asked her why she couldn’t do it and she reminded you that you haven’t been outside in a while, to soak up some sun.

She was right though, you hadn’t been out since Pope dropped you off. You agreed to run the errands. You got upstairs and decided to try to look decent since you’ve just been in pajamas. Once you were done and looked at yourself in the mirror you felt more like yourself, maybe you felt even a little happier.

You went in your car to do the things your mom told you to do, playing your music and you felt better than when you first woke up in the morning. You went to the flower shops, you went to your mom’s office to grab something, you went to the grocery store, and the last place you had to go to was Heywards. You saved that for last because you know Pope is usually with his dad, sometimes JJ and John B even helping for extra cash.

Once you walked in Mr. Heyward already smiled at you. “Y/n, how are you doing? Long time no see”

“Mr. Heyward, I’m alright. How are you? How’s Mrs. Heyward”

“Oh, she’s doing great. You know you could just call me Heyward, Y/n. Mr. Heyward makes me feel old” you both laugh. “What brings you here?” he asks, the smile still on his face.

“My mom had made an order a couple of days ago she said, I’m just here to pick it up and pay”

“I’ll get right on that” He starts to walk away but he pauses and looks back “You know, the rest of them have been around a couple of times and I haven’t seen you. Pope hasn’t even mentioned you in a while. I guess what I’m letting you know is that they miss having you around”

“Oh” was your only response, you didn’t know what to say. It felt nice knowing that they miss you, but it pains you to know they still want you around.

“I’ll get your order now. I’ll be with you right now sir” Mr. Heyward said to someone behind you and walked away quickly.

You looked behind you once he left, and it was a guy behind you. Light brown hair and blue eyes. He looked familiar but you didn’t know from where. When you looked back at him it was like his interest had peaked, once you smiled at him and he returned one you turned away.

There was an awkward silence between the two of you but Mr. Heyward came out quickly with a bag. “Here you go, that’ll be 67.95,” he said. You gave him a hundred-dollar bill. “You can keep the change Mr. Heyward” you smiled.

Mr. Heyward thanked you and you grabbed the bag walking to your car now. You put the bag in the backseat on the driver’s side but when you shut the door the boy that was inside was walking towards you.

“Hi, I don’t want to take too much of your day. I don’t know if you remember me but I saw you t that one restaurant, you were with your friends, two girls.” He says, you jog your memories and it pops up.

“Yes! I was wondering why you looked so familiar. I remember now, what’s up” you give him a gentle smile.

“Well, I was with my friends there too. And they noticed I was looking at you and they wanted me to ask you out. I kinda chickened out and when you left I thought I wasn’t going to see you again. But now that I have, I think it’s a sign to take my chance. So are you willing to maybe, go on a date with me? You could say no of course but I wouldn’t mind a yes either” he gives you a dazzling smile. He was cute. You haven’t been on a date in forever and you don’t have friends to make plans with. The worst that could happen is the date doesn’t go well.

“Yeah, sure. I’d love to”

The boy smiles wider, “great. That’s perfect uhm- Sorry I thought you would say no” he says, sounding suddenly out of breath. You giggle at him. You pull out your phone and pull up to add to contacts, giving it to him.

“Give me your number and I’ll give you mine. Just text me the details and it’s a date” you say, the boy gives you his phone quickly. You put your phone number and put your name down, then you texted yourself a little message before giving the phone back.

“Oh, I’m Jayden by the way,” the boy says.

“Y/n” you respond, walking to open your car door. “I’ll see you around Jayden” you opened the door.

“Likewise, I’ll get right on with the details,” Jayden says, you nod and he walks away a smile on both of your faces.

You enter your car and drive home in a much better mood, you needed this. A cute date with a cute guy. This could lead to absolutely nothing or maybe just a short fling, you didn’t mind either. Maybe this could help you take your mind off of the pogues.

But the pogues wouldn’t take their mind off of you. Especially not anymore. Pope was outside of Heyward’s and watched when you first pulled up to his dad’s business. Not only that but his dad mentioned you were there. Pope saw you walk out and saw a guy he’s never seen before walk up to you. He watched as you listened to what the boy was saying and he saw when you gave him your number.

He didn’t know when he was gonna bring it up but he knew he would tell the rest of them. There was a part of him that felt like it wasn’t anyone’s business, to just leave you alone. But then he reminded himself how much everyone is moping around, maybe this will be a clue.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *. ☽ .* :☆ﾟ｡･ ───

Some time has passed since you were at Heyward’s. A month to be exact.

You were happier than the month prior. The date with Jayden went so well you had another one not long after. Then you started hanging out more and more. Then he kissed you. Not long after he asked you to be his girlfriend.

You felt like it was too short, you hadn’t known him for long and he was already asking you to be his girlfriend. But you accepted anyway.

It’s been almost two months since the last time you saw the pogues. Almost two months since you saw Sarah. God, you missed her. You wanted to tell her all about Jayden, you wanted to have a girls’ day with her and Kie. You wanted to be with the pogues. You wanted to laugh like you used to, you wanted to surf with people who knew how to, and you wanted to feel fun again.

Jayden introduced you to his friends after the second date. Neither he nor his friends lived in the Outer Banks, they all lived on the mainland. They usually came out here for the summer but the commute from there to the mainland wasn’t long, so the relationship was doable when summer is over.

His friends, Austin, Rafael, Kolton, and Garrett are nice, they engage in conversations with you. The girls, April, Diana, and Alana didn’t bother you. They seemed to like you, always finding something to compliment you with. This group of friends was so much different than the one you were so familiar with. The pogues felt like a family, this one was separated into two, the boys and the girls. Everyone spoke to each other but you knew there was something deeper inside the group, a secret not everyone knew about.

You’ve mainly just been with Jayden and his friends, going to one of their house parties a couple of times. It wasn’t like the keggers but it did help you forget about the people you’d rather be with.

You were now getting ready to pick up Jayden to go to Rafael’s house, doing a light amount of makeup since you’ll be in his pool. You hear a knock on your door, you tell your mom she can come in. Your back is turned away from the door so when you hear it close followed by silence you look back. The person you didn’t expect to see was Sarah.

“Sarah… What are you.. What are you doing here?” you ask.

“Are you serious right now, Y/n?” Sarah said she is visibly angry.

You close your eyes and breathe out, once you opened them Sarah didn’t wait for a second to continue to speak.

“I haven’t seen you in almost two months. You haven’t texted me back in a week and a half to hang out with you and every time you do text back it’s some stupid excuse. I try calling you, Kie has tried calling you, hell, even John B has tried calling you to come over. I have to show up at your house unannounced and lie to your mom about being here and why she hasn’t seen me in so long. And your first words to me are asking me what I’m doing here?” she rants

You’re quiet. You don’t know what to say. A simple ‘I’m sorry’ isn’t going to solve this problem. Your silence only makes Sarah angrier.

“And Pope- he told us he saw you with some boy last week, apparently this is the second time he’s seen you with him. And not once did you even think to tell me. Is this what you’re doing? Are you just abandoning us for some random guy? Why aren’t you saying anything?!” her voice finally gets loud, she didn’t want your mom to worry but she wanted you to understand how she feels.

“Now, I’m not abandoning you guys. I’m just taking a break. You don’t get it alright” you say, getting up from your vanity and walking back and forth across your room.

“I don’t get it because you never told me anything. One day we were great, we put you and JJ on a boat and the next morning you never speak to me again. What happened on that boat?”

“JJ and I just had a bad argument. Instead of arguing, I’m just taking a break from him so we wouldn’t argue so much” it wasn’t the full truth, but it was something you could give her. Sarah stood silent to let you speak.

“If you were tired of the arguing imagine how I was. And as for the boy, I met him when Pope saw us the first time I’m guessing. But the second time, we had just started dating. We still are dating. I’m going out to see his friends now”

Sarah was silent, trying to process everything you were saying. You, dating a guy you hadn’t known for long was unlike you.

“I’m fine Sarah. I’m doing good actually. I have a good boyfriend who is treating me right and his friends are treating me like they’ve known me longer than they’ve known him. You and the rest of the pogues can stop worrying about me now. I’ll be around soon but right now, I’m not ready yet”

Sarah sucked on her teeth, she couldn’t believe what she was hearing right now. You started putting on your shoes and started walking to the door, Sarah stepping in your way.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

“I already told you, I’m going to my boyfriend’s friend’s house to hangout”

Sarah scoffed, “so you’re leaving this here, all for some people you barely even know? This isn’t like you, Y/n. Just talk to me and we could have this all figured out”

“I don’t want to talk right now Sarah and I promised Jayden I would be there today. I’m sorry for everything and I’m sorry for leaving right now but I have to go whether you like it or not.”

You maneuvered around her and opened the door, walking out of your room and going down the stairs. “Y/n” Sarah called out, you looked back as she was slowly going down the stairs.

“If you need anything. Someone to laugh with, someone to gush about your new boyfriend too, someone to cry on their shoulder. I’m here” Sarah said, her voice shaky like she was about to cry.

You walked to Sarah and hugged her tightly, tears streaming down both of your faces. You knew this wasn’t a goodbye, this wasn’t something where you would never see her again. It was more of a way of both of you saying you miss each other without actually saying you miss each other.

“I’ll talk to you soon, okay?” you whispered in her ear. Sarah nodded quickly after, “yeah, I’d like that” she laughed lightly, you laughing with her.

You separate from her and just look at her for a moment. You get the feeling to just ditch Jayden and stay with Sarah. Go back to the chateau and just hang out with everyone. You just tell everyone about the new people you met and make fun of them. You knew JJ would like it too, he had a thing for making fun of wealthy people.

But you didn’t.

You walked out of your front door, saying bye to Sarah and you drive to Jayden’s house. You waited for him to come out of his house and you looked at yourself in the mirror, your eyes puffy, a sign you had been crying. But that didn’t matter, your only thoughts were of the pogues suddenly, your only thoughts were of him.

When Jayden showed up in your car and kissed your lips. He didn’t even question your state and just went straight to talking about nonsense. Talking about things you never really cared about. You would look at him occasionally. Just because you were admiring him. You only ever did that with him. But because you started to think did you really like Jayden, or was he some sort of distraction?

You showed up at Rafael’s house, everyone already in some sort of bathing suit with a beer in their hand. You didn’t want one so once you settled down, you got into the pool. Conversations striking left and right. But you weren’t interested in them. Your mind always wandered to someplace else. You were like this the entire night.

You kept thinking about them and how happier you would be if you were there. Sarah’s words made you feel like you abandoned them. But JJ didn’t want you there. He didn’t like you being there. Then why do you keep thinking of him? Why are you imagining yourself with JJ, being a little too close if he didn’t like you?

It’s a shame your mind is everywhere else but present. Maybe if your mind was where everyone else was you would notice the pity stares you’re getting right now. Maybe you would notice Diana getting close to Jayden. Maybe you would notice their whispering. But you didn’t. And every time you looked at him, he smiled back at you.

You felt pity for him. From your perspective, you’re thinking of a different guy while you’re still with him. To you, he isn’t a bad boyfriend. To you, he deserves better. When you get up, he separates himself from Diana, and you walk over to him, sitting next to him. You kissed his cheek and then started to engage in the current conversation.

After you left Sarah went to the chateau, telling everyone what happened. She told them about how you have a new boyfriend named Jayden. She told them what you looked like. You looked normal but you didn’t look like yourself. She told them her suspicions. She told them she thinks you don’t even want to be with Jayden and that you don’t want to be with his friends either.

JJ heard it all. He wanted to go pick you up and take you back here with him. But who is he to you? The guy who made her push everyone away. The guy who made become friends with this random guy’s friends. He caused all of this. So why would you listen to him?

He was jealous when Sarah mentioned Jayden. He had been jealous when Pope had brung it up at first. He was the one who convinced the group that maybe the boy she gave her number to was just a friend. But the group knew he wasn’t, they just let JJ think he convinced them. JJ mainly convinced himself. He was jealous when Pope saw you and him again, “clinging onto each other” in Pope’s words.

JJ knew he shouldn’t be jealous, he was the one that helped the guy. But there was still that part of him that couldn’t help being jealous.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *. ☽ .* :☆ﾟ｡･ ───

You and Sarah slowly started to make up. You met up with her once since she showed up at your house three weeks ago. You spoke more about how you were doing, and how Jayden was, even showing pictures of him and all of his friends. Sarah did the same, talking about the pogues and about how much they missed you. She told you how JJ has been different since the boat. He was a lot quieter and a little calmer. It was getting harder and harder for him o want to go out, John B, Kie, and Pope doing all they could to even get him to surf. JJ loves surfing.

He didn’t even want to party anymore. Just wanted to stay in John B’s bed all day and sleep all day. It was different from the JJ you once knew.

Sometime after the meetup Sarah had convinced you to let Jayden meet her, baby steps she said. This was mainly so Sarah could get his vibe and report back to the pogues but she didn’t tell you that. She claimed it was because she wanted to warn him if he ever broke your heart.

Today was the day, Sarah had told you to meet up at the Wreck so all you had to do was get Jayden and meet her there. You had called and texted him with no response, something you’re getting used to lately because he keeps oversleeping. When he does you have to go to his room and wake him up so you knew that’s what you would most likely do today. You got ready and texted him you were on the way just in case he woke up in the middle of your driving.

You pulled to his house and walked in, already knowing the door was opened. You walked up the stairs and knocked on his door, once, twice. No response. You twisted the knob to see if he had locked it or not. But it was unlocked.

You walked in saying, “Jayden, we’re meant to be seeing Sarah today, can you wake-”

You stopped yourself. The sight in front of you makes you sick. You feel humiliated, embarrassed, angry, and lied to.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” you say loudly, Jayden and Diana jumping awake.

Both of their eyes wide, “Wait wait wait wait. Baby, Baby-” Jayden started.

“Don’t you fucking baby me. How dare you? How dare you?!” You ask him.

Diana pulled the covers over her body, “Y/n, I’m so sorry I-” she started.

“Save it.” you kept your eyes on Jayden. “I can’t fucking believe this, how long has this been going on?”

The both of them were silent. “Fucking Answer me!” you yell.

“Since before I saw you at that place the first time” Jayden responded.

Your head felt dizzy. You couldn’t believe this. This was the secret this group was hiding.

“Y/n, baby. I’m sorry I didn’t- It was an accident” Jayden said getting closer to you.

“An accident? An accident is spilling milk on the floor or tripping somewhere. This is no accident! You putting your dick inside her multiple times is not an accident!” you said getting angrier.

“I have needs baby, come on. We were together for a month and we never had sex. You don’t even send pics. I needed to release, baby. You understand that, don’t you?”

You were stunned. All of this was because he needed to fuck someone? He just needed a good lay? Is he fucking serious? Trying to blame you when he can’t keep his dick in his pants.

Although you didn’t feel an ounce of love for him. This still hurt you. No one likes being cheated on.

“And to think I was gonna introduce you to my best friend today” tears started to stream down your face.

“Y/n…” he says quietly, his arms open, taking a step closer. You step back.

“No. We’re done. Don’t call me. Don’t text me. Don’t even look at me!” you yell at him, tears still coming out of your eyes. Your eyes went to Diana, “and you. I liked you.” you scoffed. You walked out of his room, the tears trickling down to your clothes, messing your makeup up.

Once you get into your car and start driving to your house, you almost forgot to call Sarah. When you dial her number down she answers immediately, “I’m almost out the door right now-” she started, her voice cheerful as ever.

“Don’t even bother showing up. He’s a dick” you said, it was obvious you had been crying.

“Y/n, are you okay baby? What happened?” Sarah asked, worry in her voice.

You begin to cry again, even just saying the words make you sick.

“Jayden he- he was in bed with Diana,” you said, a cry following after you.

“Oh babe, I’ll be at your house in two seconds. I’ll be there” Sarah said, the sound of her front door closing.

“No, Sarah. I- Don’t come please, I-”

“I told you when you need a shoulder to cry on, I’ll be there. I’m on my way now” she said hanging up.

She felt awful for you. She texted Kie about the change of plans, she was staying with you for the rest of the day. Jayden cheated on you.

Kie told John B, Pope, and JJ. Hearing you got cheated on made JJ’s blood boil. What was the point of being with you if he was gonna cheat? He couldn’t stay loyal for a month? JJ wanted to do something, anything. He was about to go to your house but Kie had reminded him Sarah would be there with you.

That’s what stopped him. Knowing you had someone else there with you.

And you did.

Sarah showed up at your house and hugged you tighter than she’s ever hugged you before. You just cried and cried and cried on the poor girl. Sarah helped you clean your makeup off as she reminded you how beautiful you look. Sarah would look at her phone occasionally, it was mostly Kie telling her how worried JJ is and JJ texting her to see how you were holding up.

You told her everything, how Jayden first started to not wake up. Now looking back it was just him waking up Diana and getting her out before you could see her. Or maybe he hid her when you showed up. You didn’t care. You told her what happened at his friend’s house, how after Sarah spoke to you all, you thought about the pogues. All you thought about was how it would’ve been better if you were with them.

You and Sarah at one point changed into pajamas, Sarah changing into the one she leaves behind. After several hours of crying, yelling, singing, and dancing. It was beginning to get late, your eyes were both tired from the crying but also tired because you were just exhausted.

Sarah held you in her arms, your mind begins to wander.

“Do they know?” you ask quietly. Sarah knew exactly who you were talking about. She nodded.

“What did he say?” you ask even quieter. Sarah knew who you were talking about, but she wanted you to say it. “Who?” she asks.

“JJ.”

Sarah closes her eyes, holding you tighter. You were fully expecting her to say nothing, you were expecting her to say he didn’t care.

“He’s been worried sick. It’s kinda cute actually. Look” Sarah says, showing you her phone and the text messages JJ has sent.

You weren’t expecting so many texts asking how you were, if he could come over, how could he help, when she thinks you’ll be fine. Sarah just kept responding with you were getting there, that he shouldn’t come over, that he shouldn’t help, and that it takes time.

But every time JJ insisted on going over, he wanted to know your current status, he wanted to help. Once Sarah stopped answering, he kept texting the same messages as before.

At the bottom of the screen, you see the familiar three dots. They disappeared for a second and a new message popped up. “I see you reading my texts. Answer them and let me come over Sarah.”

You smile, something Sarah hasn’t seen in a while. You close your eyes once Sarah takes her phone away.

“I know this isn’t the right time. But whatever he said on the boat, Y/n. He didn’t mean it.” Sarah says quietly, when you didn’t respond, she went on.

“You see he cares about you Y/n. And it isn’t my place to tell you. But you mean a lot to him, he just doesn’t know how to handle it sometimes”

You sighed.

“Goodnight, Sarah”

Sarah was quiet, getting the memo.

“Goodnight, Y/n”

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *. ☽ .* :☆ﾟ｡･ ───

It’s been quiet now. You’ve just been in your room. Like how you were after the boat. Sarah would come over every single day, even if it meant spending 30 minutes with you, she would come over. She would even sometimes bring Kie with her.

And every time either of them would come over, their phone would always get a text ping. And every time you glanced at their phone. Even a little bit. It always said either JJ or JJ Maybank.

You’ve been moping around, Sarah was starting to feel bad, summer was about to end and John B had suggested throwing a kegger a few days ago, JJ was not really into the idea. He also said this could be an opportunity to try to get you back with the pogues. Once John B said that JJ was down.

So after Sarah was at the chateau and went to your house to just hang out, she had brought some clothes over so she could leave to the kegger after your house. But she wanted you to join her.

As she was getting ready in your room, you were snuggled up in your bed, watching her mumble some song lyrics that were playing in your room. Sarah always looked pretty, but she would always outdo herself when it comes to parties. She loved going to them and she loved the thrill of being at them. The adrenaline rushes you get and the energy that everyone has bounces off each other.

“You should come,” Sarah said, sending you out of your trace.

“What?”

“You should come. You haven’t been to a party in forever” she looked back at you.

“That isn’t true. Remember I would go to Jayden’s friend’s parties” you remind her, she rolled her eyes at the name of Jayden.

“Yeah, but those don’t count. I mean you haven’t been to a party with me in forever. If you don’t come right, you’ll have a shitty summer”

“This summer has already been shit.” you roll your eyes. Sarah walked to the side of your bed and pouted.

“I would be really happy if you came Y/n. I miss you”

You laugh, “I’m right here. You saw me yesterday and the day before that and the day before that you even brought Kie.”

“I miss the fun you have.”

You stood silent. The words hurt. Not because Sarah said it in a mean way, but because she was true. You haven’t been having fun, with anyone. You were different. More bland and private. Sarah used to be able to read you completely. Now you built a wall, so thick and so high that she hasn’t been able to break through it.

“Y/n,” Sarah says quietly, looking at you in your eyes. “What did JJ say on the boat?”

Your eyes leave hers. You didn’t want to tell her. You don’t want to. You didn’t want her to think of JJ differently. You didn’t want her to hate her boyfriend’s best friend. But god did you need to get it off of your chest.

“Just promise you won’t think of him differently” Sarah nodded.

“I said promise, Sarah,” you said, your voice stern.

Sarah was confused at the change of tone, “I promise I won’t think of him differently. And I won’t hate him”

You looked at her and nodded.

“After you guys left us, we didn’t talk. I was waiting for him to talk to me. Then the sun started to set and my phone had died, I thought to make a peace offering, I could give him our stash since you guys didn’t leave us food.”

“I told John B you guys needed something but continue”

You smiled at her for a second. “Let me just say, JJ was pissed that you guys left us alone. Like he was distraught, more so than me. And I only know that because was on the edge of where you guys left us, looking in the direction you left in. But I tried to give him the chips and talk to him but he just refused. We started arguing per usual but this time he just seemed angrier. He was saying things about how I chose to be friends with the pogues and how I could’ve been friends with kooks. He then went on to say how none of you guys liked hanging out with me and gave me reasons why you put up with me”

Sarah’s heart dropped. She knew JJ, and she knew that wasn’t like JJ. She knew what she was going to do at the party.

“I know now, he’s just an idiot and wasn’t thinking before he spoke. He was just upset. He even apologized after he said it, and tried apologizing the morning after. And I don’t fully forgive him. But hearing what he was saying hurt Sarah, terribly. At that moment I thought they were true. So I told him I wouldn’t be around you guys anymore, and I wasn’t around you guys.”

“Can I hug you?”

You nodded, Sarah getting closer to you as you both wrapped your arms around each other. “I’m so sorry that happened. None of what he said is true. I’ll talk to him tonight”

“No, don’t.” You cut her off. Sarah separated herself, confused. “I just.. I don’t want him to be mad that I told someone. I don’t want him to hate me more than he does”

Sarah laughed, “he doesn’t hate you, Y/n. He never did. He just needed to find a reason to hate you. But since you don’t want me to talk about him, I won’t.” She lied. Of course, she was going to tell him. She knew he wouldn’t be upset, but even if he did, she wouldn’t have cared.

“Thanks” you smiled at her. Sarah smiled and got up from the bed, going to your closet. Your brows knit together. “What are you doing?”

“I’m picking out your outfit for the kegger”

You sat up from your bed, “Who said I was going?”

“I did” Sarah smiled.

“Sarah, I don’t have an outfit, my hair isn’t done, and it’ll take me too long to get ready. I can’t go”

Sarah pulled out a short black dress you had stuffed in your closet long ago. “You have an outfit, I can do your hair and makeup. It’ll be quiet” Sarah said a devilish smile on her face.

“What about my mom?”

“Y/n, you walk out of your house all the time. What’s stopping you now? Just come to the kegger.”

“What if Jayden’s there?”

Sarah rolled her eyes, “he’s not gonna be there, and if he is fuck him. Show him what he cheated on. He’s a loser anyone so it shouldn’t matter if he was there or not.”

You thought about it. A smile crept on your face. You nodded and Sarah squealed loudly. She pulled you out of bed and sat you down on your vanity. She pulled your hair down and quickly went to work, taming the beast you developed over time. Not long after she started to do your makeup, telling you how excited she was you were going. Giggling at just the thought before everything started. She told you how excited Pope and John B were gonna be, she even included JJ in it.

Once she was done with your makeup you got changed in your bathroom, once you were in the dress you looked at yourself in the mirror. You knew you were gonna get clod but who cares? You looked more like yourself than you did when you were with Jayden. You liked how you looked, Sarah did a good job making it look like it took hours to get ready.

“Are you gonna come out or stay locked up in your bathroom forever?” Sarah called out from the outside. You laughed and opened the door, her mouth opening the minute she saw you. “You look so hot!” she squealed loudly.

“I feel like it too,” you say, Sarah, laughing.

“This is so exciting. I can’t wait to get you drunk” Sarah giggled.

“No way, I’m the DD. I agreed to go, you have to agree with me now”

Sarah pouted and gave you puppy eyes. “That may work on John b, but it doesn’t work on me. So give me your keys, I’m driving and let’s get the fuck out of here.”

Sarah smirked, “don’t make me makeout with you right now,” she said, you both laughed, and eventually Sarah gave you the car keys as you both got into the car.

Sarah was controlling the music the whole time while you were driving to the beach. She was yelling and screaming every lyric to every song she played. Her voice just never got tired and it made you laugh the entire time. You joined her for a couple of songs, but you mainly enjoyed the show. You missed this.

When you parked the car Sarah got out after seeing her boyfriend from the window. She smiled at the way she clung onto him like he was her lifeline. You wished you had something like that, but the last thing you needed right now was boy troubles.

You locked the door and walked up to where Sarah was, who was just with the pogues, except JJ. When you showed up John B and Pope’s eyes lit up. Pope hugged you immediately, “God I missed you. I was starting to lose brain cells with these guys,” he said. You just laughed. “Long time no see,” John B said.

“Yeah, Long time no see. Missed you guys” You respond, John B awes you and hugs you.

“Can we please share her? I need to hug her too” Kie said.

“You saw her two days ago. I haven’t seen her in almost three months” John B defended himself, still keeping you close.

Kie pulled John B away from you and hugged you gently, “Are you back now?” she asked. The rest of the pogues behind Kie waiting for an answer. You roll your eyes playfully, “since you insist” you say.

They cheer, everyone now excited to have you around again. John B gets you a cup filled with some liquor, “I’m the DD tonight, can’t” you respond.

“But it’s your first night back” Kie pleaded with you.

“I know, but I want to make sure everyone is okay for the night. Next one I’ll drink” you promised them. The pogues nodded and John B took whatever was inside the cup for you.

The rest of the night was filled with laughter and catching up. You and Kie finally talk about what happened since you were gone, bringing up the fact that JJ was different.

“Where is he anyway?” you asked.

“He was here before you showed up, probably off with some girl” Kie responded, going back to how everything was.

You felt a pang in your heart with the thought of him with someone else. This wasn’t the first time you felt that pang when someone mentioned JJ with a girl. But there wasn’t much you could do about it. So you chose to do what you always did, ignored it.

You spoke to John B about Sarah, and how much she missed you while you were gone. But when she started going over to your house every day that she was happier than ever. He acknowledged what happened with Jayden and said he was sorry for what happened. John B always felt like a brother to you, so it was no surprise that your heart grew warm when he felt bad. You told him not to worry about it and to just focus on Sarah tonight and have fun.

You then moved on to Pope who had, so many things to tell you. He was never a big drinker so he was soberer than you are you thought. He told you all of his thoughts and theories he had when you were away. He was giving you updates about schools and such and explained he missed having deep, thoughtful conversations with you. Out of the corner of your eye though, you saw a girl looking at him. You whispered it into his ear and when he looked she blushed. You took that as a sign to find Sarah as you told him to shoot his shot.

You went looking for a certain blond. You hadn’t seen him the entire time you were there and you were beginning to think he left at some point. Sarah found you first though, so when she saw you, she pulled you and started to dance with you. You could tell Sarah was already drunk but you didn’t mind it, the whole point of the kegger was to get drunk and have fun.

You’ve been at the kegger for a couple of hours now, talking to other people, meeting the last of the tourins that were the last on the island. You were enjoying yourself, completely sober, and still having a good time.

But then you saw him.

Hanging out with his friends. Pointing at you and looking back at his friends. You were gonna ignore him, he didn’t deserve your time of day. Once the laughing got louder you chose to try to walk away. You didn’t want to start something at the kegger, not after everything you’ve been this summer already.

But once you started to walk away, someone bed your arm. You quickly turn around and it’s April. Jayden’s other girl friend, or maybe someone else he was sleeping with.

“Y/n, where’d you go? Come join us” April said.

You shook your head quickly, “I’m sorry April. I have to get back to my friends” you say, putting your hand on top of her’s so she could let go.

“We just wanted to talk to you, it’ll take five minutes. Tops.” April smiled, you were cautious. You looked around the kegger for any sign of your friends so you could get out of this situation. But you couldn’t find one, not even Sarah who had been dancing the whole night. When you looked back you were already being dragged back to April and the rest of Jayden’s friends.

“Y/n!” Kolton called out, you awkwardly smiled. He was standing in between his friends, looking at you up and down. Smirking.

“We haven’t seen you in forever. Just because Jayden was fucking Diana doesn’t mean you should ditch us” Austin slurred, the rest of them laughing with him.

“Hey could you guys make this quick, I have to be with my friends,” you tell them, visibly uncomfortable.

“Your friends that you left? That you replaced?” Alana started, “if they were your friends you wouldn’t have replaced them. Stay here with us” you looked at Jayden since he was the only person who knew about the pogues, he didn’t know why you left them, just the fact that you spaced yourself from them.

“I’m sorry if you guys aren’t gonna say something worth my time, I’ll get going,” you say, beginning to walk away. But Jayden had grabbed your wrist.

“Don’t worry about them, I just wanted to talk to you. We’re all drunk” Jayden confessed, the rest of them laughing. You tried to pull your wrist away but he kept his hold on it.

“I just wanted to talk to you.” He repeats, one of his hands caressing your cheek, the other still on your wrist. You moved your face away from his touch.

“I don’t want to talk to you, Jayden”

He scoffed. “You don’t want to talk to me? Why? Because I was fucking someone behind your back?” he laughed. “It shouldn’t have been that big of a deal. I mean it doesn’t seem like it is now. You’re at a party, dancing like a slut. Talking to other guys”

Your eyes widened at his words. He probably won’t even remember this in the morning. You didn’t care about him, you never loved him, and he was just your boyfriend for a little over a month. You shouldn’t even count that as a relationship.

But if he didn’t matter, why are his words making you upset?

“I should’ve guessed you liked being thrown around. If I did I could’ve given my boys a chance. Right guys?” he asked his friends

“You know I was already asking for it,” Rafael said.

“I don’t like used-up whores” Kolton responded with bitterness in his voice. His friends laughed at his comment.

“Come on, compared to April? It’ll be an upgrade” Garrett said.

“She’s been used up. I should know. And every other guy here knows it too” Jayden continues.

“Didn’t you say you were fucking Diana because I wasn’t giving it up to you? Retracing your words?” you remind him. Jayden smiles.

“That’s what was my favorite thing about you. You were always so feisty. It’s kinda turning me on now” he said getting closer.

Your fight or flight kicks in finally, and you try to get his hand on your wrist. “Let go of me” you mumbled to him. His friends around him are saying awful things about it. Calling you a slut, a whore, ugly, dry, used up, fake, annoying. Everything in the books.

“Come on, Y/n. One last time” Jayden said, his lips getting close to yours. But you slap him just before he could. He was holding the side of his face with both of his hands, your wrists finally free.

“Leave me the fuck alone and get the fuck off the island,” You said sternly, you walked away from them and went straight to where the drinks were.

Their words to you shouldn’t matter, they don’t matter to you. Just some random people you knew for a month at most. Then why are you washing down their insults with drinks? You were taking shots, anyone that handed you a drink, you took, you even made your own. With the alcohol in your system, you forgot everything they said, you forgot everything that happened over the summer. It didn’t matter anymore, you were having fun.

JJ had been watching you from the minute you showed up, from afar obviously. He could tell you were looking for him at some points, but he didn’t have the guts to go up to you. So he just stood watching.

Usually, JJ would have a drink, but he didn’t have one. You may hate him and he saw that you weren’t drinking but he just wanted to make sure you were okay. He saw the way you spoke to John B, Kie, Pope, he saw the way you danced with Sarah. You looked like you needed this break from the world. He saw you speaking to some old friends and saw you speak with some new ones, but you looked okay.

He saw someone walk up to you, a very drunk girl. He saw you look around but you end up being pulled away. JJ is about to walk up to you but someone else gets his attention.

“JJ!” Sarah calls, sloppily walking over to him, JJ meets her halfway and laughs, his back now facing where you were.

“Sarah, how much have you had to drink?” JJ asked, still laughing.

“Not enough, but that isn’t why I came over here. I wanted to talk to you about Y/n” she slurred her words, but JJ understood every word. His face became serious when your name was mentioned.

“She told me what happened on the boat. And I just want you to know that I don’t hate you. I really like you.” Sarah says, “but I know you like Y/n”

JJ’s face turned pink, he felt blessed that it was night and Sarah wasn’t able to see that well. “What? Where’d you get that idea” he asked her.

“You’re always asking for her JJ. You’re always looking for her, even before the boat thing. I want you to know I get it, you have abandonment issues. So do I, look at my mom. But I don’t want those issues to define who you are and how you are around people” Sarah’s words are combined, but JJ is listening. “I know you like her. I know you think you shouldn’t be with her. I think the same thing with John B. But you know what I do? I show him more love and affection than he’s ever had before.”

Sarah pauses to catch her breath, drinking what’s in her red solo cup. “And she doesn’t hate you. She never has hated you. I always told John B that you two would look so cute together. And you guys would. But I need you to be better to her, JJ. I need you to forget about your issues for a second and show her who you truly are.” she ranted, “If you want her, you’re gonna have to work harder than before, But it’ll be worth it because she’s worth it. You need to fight for her. She likes you too JJ. That’s why she took your words so seriously. Cause your opinion matters to her more than John B’s or Pope’s or Kie’s. Maybe even mine” Sarah laughed at the last sentence. “So be kind to her, show her how you truly feel about her, and make sure you love her more than she loves you. Because of you don’t, I’ll break your neck” she laughed even louder than before.

JJ was thinking about her words, and even though she was drunk, she wasn’t wrong. JJ has always liked you, he thinks he always will like you. JJ was always a player but when you showed up, he got worse because of it. It came to the point where he imagined you instead of the girl he was actually with.

John B came over and put his arm around Sarah, “what’s happening over here?” he laughs, sipping his drink now too. John B is now drunk, to be expected.

“I was just telling JJ that he should be with Y/n and that he likes her and that she likes him back” Sarah filled him in, and John B’s mouth opened.

“Dude, I’ve been saying for like ever. It came to the point where I thought you were in love with her” John B laughs, “and she likes you back”

“That’s what I’m saying!” Sarah said loudly, both her and her boyfriend now laughing.

“Then when they start dating we can go on double dates. We’ll be so cute, all of us” Sarah commented.

“Just go for it. I know she means a lot to you, she always had.” John B said.

“Do I mean a lot to you?” Sarah asked him.

“Of course baby. I love you” John B said.

“I love you too,” Sarah said, their lips then locked on each, making out in front of JJ.

He internally threw up in his mouth and turned around, but when he looked back he didn’t see you anymore. His eyes scattered everywhere and he couldn’t find you. He saw the new friends you made, he saw the mini bar, he saw some kooks, he saw a guy with his friends holding his face, he saw where you danced earlier.

JJ decided to make himself be seen, he saw Kie who was talking to some girl about ocean stuff. Kie also being drunk.

“Hey, have you seen Y/n?” JJ asked

“No, but she was looking for you earlier. Did you see her earlier she was looking so hot” Kie confessed.

“Yeah, she was. If you see her, tell me” JJ said moving along to Pope.

“Hey man, I haven’t seen you in a while,” Pope said, clearly sober as day.

“Yeah, just been watching. Have you seen Y/n?”

Pope shook his head, “last time I saw her she was taking shots with some guys. When I went up to her she gave me Sarah’s keys.” he said holding them out.

JJ nodded, he took out the keys to the twinkie, “here, take these. You’ll drive John B and Sarah home tonight. I’ll take Kie and Y/n”

Pope nodded to the new plan, the two of them traded keys and JJ walked away. He was now looking for you. He started to ask random people if they saw you, everyone saying something different.

Forty-five minutes had passed since he spoke to Pope and he still hasn’t found you. It was 3 AM and the kegger was still alive as ever. JJ was looking for you everywhere and he couldn’t find the girl who last spoke to you. Once JJ walked further down the beach, he then saw a familiar pretty girl in a familiar pretty black dress.

You were wobbling all over the place, talking to some random guy about your problems. Your words were slurring worst than Sarah’s who you saw ten minutes okay. But you then hear a familiar voice.

“Y/n?” he says.

You turn around and there he is. You excuse yourself from the guy, and cling to him “JJ!” you say excitingly.

JJ was so confused, the last time he saw you, you were stone-cold sober. Now he’s seeing you towards the water, wobbling around, talking to the air, and excusing yourself from the same air to hug him tightly.

“I missed you so much,” you say to him, your head in his chest. You were way too drunk for him to try to stall to wait for Kie. He decided he would take you home right there, Pope could take Kie with him.

“Hey, we’re gonna go home okay?”

All you do was nod, separate yourself from him, and start walking with him, wobbling next to him. JJ noticed it immediately and held onto you, his hand on your side to pull you close to him, your arm around his shoulders.

JJ began to look for Pope who he found quickly, he raised his eyebrows and looked at you. Pope got the memo and nodded, now watching Kie. Once JJ knew he walked to Sarah’s car, you were babbling the whole way there. And once you got to the car you were silent, JJ opened the backseat so you could lie down.

He made sure you were comfortable and secure, once he knew you were he went in the driver’s seat. The minute he started driving, you started to speak up again.

“Where are we going?” you ask.

“I’m dropping you off home,” JJ said.

“No no no no no. I don’t want to go home. I want to go to John B’s house. Where you stay”

“Are you sure? I could take you to your hou-”

“No!” you demanded, “Alright, calm down,” JJ said.

“Hey, next one’s on me”

“Whatever you say, cupcake”

You laughed quietly in the back, then it slowly became louder. “What’s so funny?” he asked.

“So you know about Jayden right? The guy that cheated on me? Well, he was the keeger and his friends were saying so many things to me. Like really mean things, and so was he. But tonight I-” you cut yourself off with your laughter. “I slapped him” you laughed even louder than before.

JJ stood silent, letting you speak longer. “It was so funny, you should’ve seen his face. You should’ve been there,” you said then you were quiet for a while. “Why weren’t you there?” you asked quietly.

JJ looked at you through his top mirror and then looked back at the road. He cleared his throat, “I was there” he responded.

“No, you weren’t. I kept looking for you and looking for you and I couldn’t find you. I thought you were with a girl. Were you?”

“No, I was watching you”

“Like a stalker?”

JJ was silent. Now that you say it like that it sounded creepy. He was just looking out for you but that’s something else a stalker would say. The more he thought about it the more it made him uncomfortable, but you sent him out of his trance with you giggling.

“JJ Maybank is my stalker” you giggled to yourself. JJ stood quiet letting you have your moment.

“Jayden was so boring anyway, I was out of his league anyway.”

“You sure are”

“You haven’t even seen him and you’re agreeing. That’s how you know I’m right” JJ laughed at your drunken state. Your words slurring together and the way you’re trying so hard to form a sentence is so cute to him.

“He just wanted to hangout with his boring friends all the time. And I always had to take him because he didn’t know how to drive” you laughed. “Do you know how I found out he cheated on me? We were meant to meet Sarah and then when I got to his house, I found him in bed with his girl space friend. Might as well be his actual girlfriend for how long they were fucking each other, it started before he and I started dating, which wasn’t long but still. And you know what excuse he gave? Because we never had sex, isn’t that childish?” You ranted.

JJ has only ever heard what Sarah has told him, so hearing you say how it went, made JJ upset. More than upset. It felt like when he first heard you got cheated on. He never found out why he cheated on you, but now that he does, he’s angry about it. He cheated on you because he needed to fuck someone and you weren’t willing? He’s a fucking idiot he thought. “You wouldn’t do that, would you JJ?” you ask him.

“No, not to you”

“Not to me or in general?”

“Both,” he said.

You and JJ stood silent.

“JJ do you hate me?” you ask.

He looks at you through the mirror again, “I could never hate you, Y/n”

“Are you mad at me?

JJ was quiet for a moment, “no. Never.”

You giggled, “you know what I realized, his name is Jayden, and your name is JJ. Isn’t that funny?” you laughed. “What’s even funnier is how you both have the same basic features. His hair is almost blond and he has blue eyes too”

JJ tilted his head to the side slightly after hearing the news. He thinks he knows who you’re talking about, mainly because he thinks he’s seen him at the wreck with some girl.

“But don’t worry JJ. You’re my favorite blue-eyed person. I can’t say blond because of Sarah. But you’re my favorite guy with blond hair”

JJ smiled, “thanks Y/n. You’re my favorite too”

He pulls up to the chateau, once he puts the car in park and grabs the keys, he’s already going straight to the back. He scootches you closer to him so he could pick you up instead of making you walk, and he does.

You grab on around JJ’s neck as he carries you bridal style into the chateau and into the room he usually sleeps in. JJ places you on the bed and takes out a pair of sweatpants for you to wear.

“I know you’re wearing a dress. Put these on, I’ll be right outside the door, and tell me when I could come in” JJ said, leaving you with the sweatpants. When he’s out he hears some groans and mumbles, but nothing too serious. He grabs a bucket and fills it with a little bit of water, a rag, and makeup wipes that Sarah had left, waiting at the door for you.

You open the door to let him back in and when JJ looks at you, you’re not only in his sweatpants but in his shirt, when he wants in he sees the discarded dress on the floor. “This is for you, you could take it off in the bathroom,” JJ said, handing you the makeup wipes.

You look at him in awe. Like he just hung the moon and the stars. And maybe in your drunken state, he did. You take the wipes and went to the bathroom closing the door behind you. JJ places the bucket close to the bed just in case you have an accident in the middle of the night and he isn’t there.

He takes his extra time to change into the same attire as you, a shirt with sweatpants. Usually, he wouldn’t have a shirt but, out of being a gentleman, he will tonight.

You walk out of the bathroom and hand him back the wipes, climbing into bed. JJ puts them away and goes back to you, crouching down so you could be at your level. “I’m gonna sleep on the sofa bed, when Kie gets here she can sleep in here with you. If you need anything just wake me up. I left a bucket f-” JJ was cut off.

But he wasn’t cut off by your words, or by the pogues coming home. He was cut off by a kiss, a kiss you gave him. It was unlike you. JJ was stunned for a moment, but his body moved as in instinct. Your lips were soft and warm. He can taste the alcohol from your lips. If it was any other situation, he would’ve deepened the kiss, grabbing your face. Pulling you closer so your bodies could collide with each other. He would’ve shown you how long he had been waiting and hungry for it but he didn’t think he deserved it.

But he pulls away from you. When he does, he rests his forehead against yours, and you’re pouting at him. Disappointed in him. “Did I do something wrong?” you ask, sounding like you were about to cry.

“No, baby. No No. I just-” he was thinking of the right words to say. “You’re drunk, Y/n. I don’t want you to do something you’ll regret or forget about in the morning”

“But I won’t regret or forget about it J.” You tell him.

JJ doesn’t know how to respond to that. The only thing he knows how to do is to kiss your cheek to keep you satisfied, which it does. He stands up straight.

“If I were sober, would you have kissed me back?” you giggled. You knew the answer, you just wanted him to say it. JJ rolled his eyes playfully, walking to the door. “Wait where are you going?” you sat up from the bed.

“I told you I’ll sleep on the couch”

“Stay here”

JJ looks between you and the door. “Y/n, I don’t think I-”

“Please.”

You flashed your puppy eyes at him, your first time doing it to him. He never understood how you were able to get whatever with it. But now he does.

He sighs and slowly walks to the bed, slipping under the covers next to you. He feels the heat you’ve gained from under the blanket, he also feels you relax. Once he’s laying down, you wrap your arms around him, leaving a hand on top of his chest. JJ relaxes and puts an arm around your shoulders, keeping you close. His closes for a second, but once you move your hand on top of his chest slightly, he opens them again.

He notices the black and blue mark around your wrist, “Y/n” he whispers. You hum in response, too tired to answer anything anymore. “Who did that to your wrist?”

Your breathing pauses for a beat or two but continues soon after. “Jayden,” you said quietly. “And why did he do that?” he continues to speak in whispers, but you hum back at him. “You can tell me, baby. Why did he make a bruise on your wrist?” he asked, closing his eyes and leaning his head against yours.

You breathed in and out, “He and his friends were saying things about me. Calling me a slut, commenting on my dress, and who I was with. Telling me how easy I was, just saying mean things to me. When I tried to he wouldn’t let go after I told him to. He just kept talking and I think he was about to kiss me. But once I slapped him he let go though. And I left after that J.”

“And then you got drunk afterward?”

You hum, JJ is quiet. “Are you mad at me?”

JJ shakes his head lightly, “no. Never.”

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *. ☽ .* :☆ﾟ｡･ ───

JJ had woken up twice.

The first time was very early in the morning, and you were still in each other’s arms. You holding onto him especially tight. He had opened his eyes and once he saw you, he went back to sleep.

And again in the afternoon. The chateau was quiet, he knew everyone was sleeping. He noticed that the warm body that was next to him was no longer next to him. He wouldn’t be lying if he said he wasn’t upset you were no longer next to him. But he reminds himself you couldn’t have gone far, you didn’t have a car and you’re most definitely hungover.

JJ got up from the bed, rubbed his eyes, and made his way out of the familiar room, his dress still on the floor as he passed by it. He walks out of the room quietly and slowly, Pope sleeping in a small chair and Kie sleeping on the couch. He looks out the door and sees a familiar someone, the person he wanted to see when he woke up.

When he walked out of the house you were sitting on the edge of the dock, the hms pogue boat on your right. You hadn’t noticed a new person was there with you until the wood you were sitting on started to make noise, it didn’t take a genius to know it was him.

He stood standing as you were still sitting in his sweatpants and shirt. It was silent for a minute, a silence that made you both want to rip off your skin. But you didn’t. Because he broke the silence.

“Hey”

That’s all he said, after everything, last night all he had to say was hey.

“Hi,” you said quietly.

“How are you holding up?”

“Other than a major migraine and a bucket full of embarrassment. I’m peachy”

JJ smiled a bit, he’s happy you were able to see it though. “Do you remember anything that happened last night? You got drunk pretty quickly”

“Yeah I remember” JJ stood quiet for a minute. He wanted to make you remember everything that happened last night. From when you first started drinking to when you asked him to stay in bed with you.

“Everything?” He asked quietly.

You knew what he was talking about. The kiss.

You looked back at him and looked up to look at hin the eyes, “everything.”

JJ breathes in and out quietly, you turn back to the water. “Do you remember how excited everyone was to see you?” You smiled at the reminder. The smiles on their faces. You nodded in response. “They really missed you. I’m sure you already know that, they most likely told you. Does this mean you’re staying?”

You sighed. You didn’t know what you were gonna do. You planned on staying last night, but now with this thing with JJ. The boundaries you crossed. You don’t think you’ll ever be his friend after this, you’ll always feel that feeling of something more, little did you know so would he.

“I don’t know” you answered truthfully.

JJ stood up straighter, he was confused. You were having so much fun last night, it looked so natural to you. The thought of you not coming back and his friends being upset again crushed him.

“What do you mean? I thought you were gonna back up”

“Things have changed JJ, especially now. I don’t think I can put myself through it, not again”

“Y/n, our fighting isn’t going to happen again. They need you around. You don’t understand what it was like when you were gone.”

You scoffed at that. You didn’t understand what you were going through. He doesn’t understand what you went through.

“I went through the same thing as they did, if not worse.”

“You aren’t seriously comparing the two are you?”

You stood up from the edge of the dock, you turned to face him. “I am because you don’t get to tell me what they felt when I had to deal with the guilt of leaving.”

“And you’re willing to feel that guilt again?” You scoffed at his words, beginning to walk past him. “I can’t tell you what to do but I can encourage you to stay. They want you around Y/n, they need you around” he went on to say, you continued to walk away.

“I need you around”

You stopped. You felt so many emotions. There was a part of you that wanted to run back to him and smother him with kisses. The other half of you wanted to yell and scream in his face for how he treated you.

So you listened to that other half.

You turned around quickly and looked like you were on a mission. “That’s real funny of you JJ because three months ago you wanted nothing to do with me. Now you say you need. Do you need me to be around you? If you need someone around you don’t treat them like shit and that’s exactly what you did to me.”

“Y/n, listen-”

“No, you listen!” you yelled, not caring if the pogues woke up and see you yelling at him. “I was nothing but nice to you and you treated me like I was trash. Like I wasn’t there like I didn’t exist. Like I didn’t matter. But now. Now! I matter. After I kiss you when I’m drunk, I matter!”

JJ was silent. You had every right to yell at him, he did this. He made you like this. He understands how the switch-up confuses you. He knows he deserves every second of this, this is something he’s willing to take. So he just lets it happen.

“You remember when I asked you why you hated me? Do you? And you always told me that it was because I was a kook. What about now? Does it still matter I’m still a kook? Or does it just go away?! Tell me JJ. Does it just go away?!” you push his chest.

“I had to leave my friends because of you! I got into a relationship to forget the feeling! To forget the thought that I abandoned them! And you did that! You made me abandon my friends! It’s not fair how you made me leave them and now you’re telling me they want me back. That you need me back!” You look up at him and all you see are his sad blue eyes.

You push his chest again, and again, and again, and again. There were tears quickly coming down your face, and you were yelling at him. Telling him how it wasn’t fair. Telling him he’s a dickhead. Telling him how you hate how he makes you feel. Telling him how you feel right now.

JJ wrapped his arms around you as you tried to keep pushing. Stopping once he was too close so you just sobbed into him, wrapping your arms around him too. JJ kept kissing the top of your head, trying to soothe you and call you down. He just wanted to be with you.

You hated him right now. Sometimes people say things out of anger. Sometimes people say things they don’t mean. But not you. You meant every word. And you wanted to make sure he knew you meant it, and he did know.

You did feel like it was unfair. You knew he was a dickhead. You felt angry. And you did hate how he makes you feel. You want to fully hate him. But you can’t, even if you try to convince yourself, you can’t.

Once you calmed down, JJ pulled away slightly, but you held him closer. You didn’t want to let him go you didn’t want to go back to how you were before. You didn’t want to go back to reality. You wanted to stay here, clinging onto him, and not thinking about anything else.

But once JJ tried to slip away again, you knew it wasn’t possible.

He looked at you, but you weren’t looking back at him, staring at the floor. JJ lifted your chin to look at him. Once you did he wiggled his other hand to wrap it around your hand. He held your hand so gently, but he still had a good grip on you.

“I’m so sorry for everything. For the way, I treated you over the years, for the words I’ve said to you. I’m sorry for what I said on the boat. I’m sorry for making you leave us. I’m sorry for not being there for you when I should’ve been. I’m sorry for making you feel like you weren’t there like you didn’t exist like you didn’t matter. Because you do matter. You matter to me. You always have”

There were tears still streaming down your face, but now JJ was matching you. He didn’t realize he was crying until the droplet was hanging from his face.

“You shouldn’t say things you don’t mean JJ,” you said quietly.

“But I do mean them. I mean all of them.”

“JJ-”

He kisses you. His hand is on the side of your side to keep you close. He was gentle with you, but you felt the hunger from his lips. You felt the longing and felt how bad he wanted this, needed this even. It wasn’t sloppy like last night, it wasn’t a chance he took. It was passionate. It was hard. It was perfect.

He was so warm. He smelled like leftover cologne and wood. JJ’s eyes were closed. His nose was brushing against your’s but you didn’t mind it. His lips feel smooth and it was obvious JJ was a good kisser. He wasn’t rough with you, he wanted you to feel it this time.

For the first second and a half, you stopped breathing. But you eventually kissed him back, closing your eyes with him. Your hands were on his face and his neck and once he felt you kiss back the hand that once held yours was holding your waist, pulling you close.

His mind fogged up with just you. Only you. Nothing and no one else, just you. All those hookups meant nothing because right now you’re with him. All those years of yearning for you finally came true.

Your mind fogged up with just him. You’ve always liked JJ, maybe you even loved him. But all the memories from before came rushing back. All of them.

You pulled back, JJ following you. But then he couldn’t follow you anymore. You both were breathing heavily. Again, his forehead leaning against yours.

“J,” you said, your voice breathy.

JJ doesn’t respond, waiting for you to finish.

“I have to go,” you say.

His heart dropped. He knew what you meant. He knew what you were trying to stay. He doesn’t want you to go, he doesn’t want you to leave him.

“No… Stay”

“I have to go, J” stepping away from him, looking into his eyes.

“You asked me last night if you were sober and if I would’ve kissed you back. And I would have. I would’ve kissed you at the kegger. I would’ve kissed you on the boat. I would’ve kissed you at the chateau. I would’ve kissed you when I first met you. Please don’t go”

“I can’t J.” your hands leave him.

“Let me take you home at least, please Y/n.” he pleaded with you.

You shook your head at him. “I can’t let you do that J,” you said

“Why not?”

“Cause then I’ll stay here,” you said softly.

JJ just sighed, looking up at the sky for a second, his eyes getting watery again. He then looked at the ground to avoid eye contact with him.

“I’m taking Sarah’s keys. When she wakes up if you could tell her”

JJ never responded, just silently crying, looking at the ground. You walked towards him and grabbed ahold of his wrist and shoulder to keep your balance. JJ saw the bruise around your wrist again. And you kissed his cheek. “I’ll see you around JJ” you whispered.

You then walked back into the chateau, you were crying too now. You just kept wiping your tears when you walked inside the chateau. You grabbed the car keys and quickly walked out, looking at JJ one last time.

He was crouched down, his arms folded and his head on them. He would move slightly. He was sobbing.

You looked away and got into Sarah’s car, starting it and driving away from him.

Much to JJ’s unlucky life, the pogues had seen and watched the scene. When you walked in Kie and Pope pretended to still be asleep but you didn’t even glance at them. JJ was out on the dock for an hour before he wiped his tears and went back inside the chateau. When he walked in, the pogues all looked at him.

He didn’t want to deal with them and their questions right now so he just went back to the room you slept in and locked the door behind him. He went into bed, your scent still engraved in the sheets even when you weren’t there for long. When he sat up from the bed, he saw your dress in the corner of the room.

JJ closed his eyes and leaned his head against the wall. Wanting nothing more than to just have you with him again.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *. ☽ .* :☆ﾟ｡･ ───

Now and again you would go back to the chateau but only went JJ wasn’t around. Usually, he was working and Sarah would promise you he wouldn’t be there for a while. You would go in your car and just hang out with them like you used to. You even had a chance to surf with them.

But when he came back, before he could even see you, you would quickly say your goodbyes and leave in your car. That’s the only reason why you would bring your car, it was so you could make a quick exit.

Fortunately for you, the pogues never pestered you with questions. They never asked why you were avoiding JJ. It seemed like they were just happy to have you around. But you felt the absence when you were there. There was a missing piece.

Unfortunately for JJ, they always asked him questions. Every time they saw him they asked him why you were avoiding him. He would simply say, “you guys saw what happened. I don’t know” and then go to the room he stood in.

They wanted you both back together but the boat idea was out of the question, and that ruined everything for everyone. So they didn’t know what they were going to do now.

Today JJ was with the pogues at the wreck, helping Kie do her job. John B’s keys with her mom and Sarah’s phone with her dad so they couldn’t get distracted. But now they were just taking a break, all of them outside of the wreck. Talking about nonsense.

A car full of people pulled up to the parking lot. They were extremely loud, the pogues glancing at them a few times but continuing their conversation. Three girls and three girls get out of the car.

“They look familiar” Sarah mumbled, the pogues then looking at them as they walked to the entrance.

A guy got out of the passenger seat, “make sure it comes quick!” he said, leaning against the car.

“Oh my god,” Sarah said, “What?” Pope asked confused.

The guy’s friends laughed and walked into the wreck, the guy now scrolling on his phone.

“That’s Jayden,” Sarah said. JJ looked at the guy, with light brown hair, and blue eyes. It was him.

“Whose Jayden?” John B asked, getting overprotective.

“Y/n’s ex. The guy that cheated on her over the summer. She showed me pictures of him and his friends one time.”

“Is he? JJ and I have seen him with some girl, it was the girl with the dark hair” Kie said.

“That’s Diana! Oh my god, don’t look at him. I don’t know if Y/n showed me what I look like. Act like we’re having a conversation” Sarah said, looking away, Jayden not even noticing the pogues.

“We were having a conversation,” Pope said plainly.

“You know what I mean!” Sarah whisper yelled.

The conversation they were just having again picked up, but JJ didn’t engage in it this time. He just kept staring at him. He never left his sight. The bruise on your wrist flashed in his eyes. The memories of what you said he and his friends were saying to you popped up in his mind. JJ just saw red.

He stood up, the pogues not noticing at first.

“You’re Jayden, right?” JJ asked, walking to him.

Jayden looked up and looked JJ up and down. He looked confused. The pogues looked up once they heard JJ’s voice.

“Yeah, why?” Jayden responded.

Not even a second later JJ punched him in the face, Jayden getting low to the ground.

“JJ!” Kie yelled, the rest of the pogues getting up to stop him.

But JJ never stopped, he just kept punching him, and punching him, and punching him. He couldn’t stop. He just kept thinking of the bruise, and your face when you told when what they said. He kept thinking of you.

Eventually, the pogues finally pulled JJ off, “What the fuck man?” Jayden yelled, blood leaking out of his nose.

“Why don’t you give me a bruise huh?! Give me one!” JJ yelled out.

John B and Pope were trying to calm JJ down, holding him back away from Jayden. The both of them yelled at each other, Sarah trying to calm down Jayden from the other side of the parking lot.

Because of the amount of noise outside, people started to notice, includg Jayden’s friends who walked out.

“Diana, call the cops,” one of them said, the dark-haired girl nodding.

“No, don’t call the cops!” Kie said, the girl just looking at Kie like she was crazy.

“You think you can just cheat on her and not face the consequences?!” JJ yelled

“Holy shit, you’re with Y/n?” Jayden laughed.

“That slut?” one of the girls laughed.

“What did you just say?” Sarah asked, walking to the girl that said it.

“Sarah, don’t.” John B warned.

“I should’ve known she had a thing for dirt. I’m not surprised, she’s dirty herself” Jayden continued to laugh.

“Say that again!” JJ yelled.

JJ was itching to go back at him again, and he knew that if he kept talking about you. It wouldn’t end well.

“I called her slut, is there a problem?” the girl said.

“Yeah, it is a fucking problem. That’s my fucking best friend” Sarah got in the girl’s personal space.

There was so much yelling going on, the boys were yelling at each other, Sarah and this random girl were coming up, and Diana was on the phone as Kie was arguing with another girl who wanted Diana to call the police.

“She’s all used up now and you still want that bitch? I could only imagine how slutty she is now” Jayden said.

That was JJ’s limit.

JJ pushed John B and Pope off of him and went straight to Jayden, yet again punching him.

Jayden’s friends ran towards JJ and John B and Pope went to get them off of JJ. The boys have their brawl of three going against four.

Sarah took this as an opportunity to hit the girl in the face. Another girl came up from behind her but Kie went after her, that being the only fair fight of two going against two. Diana was already on the phone with the police.

Multiple people from the restaurant ran outside to record the brawls instead of trying to stop them. The pogues seemed to be winning, JJ even holding his own when Jayden and one of his friends tried going after him together.

Not long after, the cops had shown up, separating everyone from everyone. Now it was a yelling match between the pogues and some random people on the island. The randoms had visibly more injuries than the pogues did. The only injured ones were Sarah and Kie who only had a scratch. The randoms had blood coming out of their noses, their cheeks were cut, and their lips were cut. And JJ knew he broke Jayden’s nose. They looked like they went through a brawl. While the pogues looked like they got a little dirty.

“Talk shit about my girl again and see what happens!” JJ yelled

“How you tried to fight her when she was already beating your friend’s ass?!” Kie yelled at the girl

“What did you think was gonna happen when you put your hands on him?!” John B yelled.

“Get the fuck off the island!” Sarah yelled.

“Don’t say shit you don’t mean” Pope yelled.

“Your girl? Or the island’s?!” Jayden yelled.

“You should’ve told your friend to back off man!” one of the guys yelled.

“She beat my ass?! Please” A girl yelled.

Everyone was being held back, the officer who had JJ having to work harder than the rest of them. JJ just kept pulling and pulling. He was ready to pounce on his prey and beat him again. Eventually, everyone was in handcuffs. The random guys with each other in one car, the two random girls in another with another random boy. Pope, JJ, and John B in one car, Sarah and Kie in another.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *. ☽ .* :☆ﾟ｡･ ───

You were watching tv as you were eating your cereal. Sarah or Kie texted you that they be free and JJ was with them so you decided to keep yourself busy. You had just cleaned your room and bathroom, so you just needed a little break before you could do anything else.

Your phone started to ring next to you, and when you looked at the screen it was a random number. You usually don’t answer random numbers you don’t know, but something in you told you to answer this one, so you did.

“Hello?”

“Y/n! Thank god you answered. I need a small favor from you.”

“Sarah? What’s going on? Is everything alright?”

“No actually. Uhm.” Sarah stopped for a second, she sounded like she was speaking to multiple people but went back to you. “We got arrested”

You almost dropped your cereal, pausing your movie. You got up from the couch and walked to your kitchen. “We? Whose we? Who got arrested? How did you get arrested? Why did you get arr-”

“John B, Pope, Kie, JJ. We were at the wreck and- I’ll tell you everything. But we just need you to bail us out. Please. I didn’t want to call my dad and he-”

“Of course, I’m on my way,” you say, putting a hoodie over your shirt but keeping your shorts on.

“You’re a lifesaver, I owe you one,” Sarah said, the stress coming off of her shoulders.

“Don’t even worry about it. I’ll be there as quick as I can, alright?” You say putting on your shoes.

“We’ll be waiting,” Sarah said before hanging up.

You drove as quickly as you could to the Wreck. Grabbing something in your car before, getting out, and seeing Kie’s mom immediately. “Hi, uhm. I don’t know if you heard about Kie yet or not. But if you did don’t worry about it, I’m getting everything solved right now. But did they leave anything behind?” you ask her.

Kie’s mom nodded and made you follow her to the back, “This is Sarah’s phone and John B’s keys. I don’t how you get it done, just get them home. Safely” she responded, you nodded and quickly walked out.

You got in the twinkie instead, you knew you wouldn’t be able to fit all of the pogues in your car. You drove to the Sheriff’s department quickly, once you parked, and quickly walked in and went straight to Shoupe’s office.

The receptionist tried calling you to stop you but you didn’t care, when you walked into his office and the receptionist tried to stop you, Sheriff Shoupe stopped her.

“That’s alright, She can stay,” he said, putting his hand up to defend you. She huffed and walked back to where she usually sat. “What can I do for you today, pum-”

“I know you have my friends. I want them back” You say in a stern voice.

Shoupe sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose.

“You want your friends back” he repeats, more so for himself than for you. “Do you even know what they did? They got into a brawl with people from the mainland. This isn’t some stupid prank, JJ broke a boy’s nose”

You closed your eyes and breathed in and out. You knew the people from the mainland were Jayden and his friends. And you knew the boy JJ broke his nose was Jayden.

“And where are the people from the mainland now? Running free while my friends are-”

“They’re here with them if you would like to see them,” he said.

You ran a hand through your hair, you didn’t want to see them. Shoupe knew you were starting to get stressed.

“Y/n, does your mom know you’re here right now?”

You laughed at that, he was trying to scare you with your mom. She would be upset you were there, and she would be even more upset that you went to bail your friends out. But you didn’t care about that, not right now anyway.

“Can’t I just bail my friends out? Don’t make this more difficult than it has to be”

“There’s a lot of paperwork that involves an adult. I’m sure you know that by now with JJ. I don’t think you would want to deal with that again. So Miss Y/l/n. You may leave my office right now” Shoupe said going back to his computer.

You threw an orange envelope on his desk. Shoupe stopped what he was doing and looked at it. “What is this?” he asked

“Ten thousand dollars. Three thousand three hundred for my friends. Four thousand seventy for the mainlands. The rest of the two thousand, seven hundred, and forty dollars goes to you and the money you can use to make sure this incident isn’t on their records. On my friend’s records.”

“Are you bribing me, Miss Y/l/n?”

“I’m helping my friends. Ten thousand is my only and final number” You warned him.

Shoupe was in thought, he was thinking about the choices he had here. He then spoke into one of those police speakers, “let the kids out. All of them” he said, you smiled and walked out of his office.

None of the pogues went through the system and all of this was being kept off of their record, they were safe another day. Sarah was the first to walk out, running and hugging you when she saw you.

“You’re the best” she whispered in your ear.

“Yeah I know” you laughed.

Kie walked out after, also hugging you. “Oh my god, I love you and your money,” she said, you laugh at her, “I love you too I guess’ you say with a smile on your face.

The three of you walk outside, Sarah explaining what happened, Kie adding to her story. The three of you leaned against the twinkie so the rest of the pogues could see you guys. And they did, all three of them coming out at the same time.

“I knew you would come in handy,” John B said,

“Yeah yeah, get in the passenger. I’m driving” you respond.

John B nods and the rest of the pogues get in the back, talking over each other trying to tell you the story. Everyone except JJ was quiet. Too quiet. He would glance at you but nothing more.

You were about to walk into the driver’s side but saw Jayden and his friends walking out. “Stay here” you mumbled.

Everyone but JJ was calling you back as you started to walk to Jayden. Once you were finally in his view he scoffed.

“You got your friends to gang up on us?” Alana asked.

“No, I didn’t. But from what heard, it was a fair fight. If anything you guys had the upper hand, there was more of you” you respond.

“It doesn’t matter, what does matter is the lawsuit they’re gonna be bombarded with,” Jayden said, warning you.

“That’s what I came here for. You won’t be pressing charges”

“And why’s that?” Jayden asked, amused.

“Who do you think paid for your bond? I do something for you, you do something for me, and don’t press charges” You explain.

The rest of his friends stood quiet. “Your boyfriend broke my nose” Jayden argued with you.

“And you deserved it, if not more.” You got close in his personal space, “you aren’t going to press charges. None of you are. But if one day I find out you are. You’re gonna fucking wish you never saw me at the Wreck the first time” you say, walking from them and back to the twinkie.

You got in and started to drive to the chateau, the drive there is silent. Too silent. You don’t know how you’ll get your car back from the wreck but, you’ll get it eventually. When you arrive at the chateau and when John B opens the back door, JJ is the first to run out, saying he needs a shower.

The rest of the pogues followed him inside, Pope sitting on the couch, Sarah and John B whispering things to each other, and Kie pacing back and forth. You were still here though, but your mind was just on him. Why did he fight Jayden? Why did he start it?

You needed to clear your mind, you knew the ten thousand dollars in your car would come in handy, but you didn’t expect to finish it in one go. Now you’ll just keep a small amount. “I’m going to the beach,” you say before leaving the chateau.

The beach wasn’t far from John B’s house, so you just walked there. So when you did get there, you saw down and looked at the water.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *. ☽ .* :☆ﾟ｡･ ───

JJ got out of the shower and he needed to talk to you. But when he walked out he didn’t see you. At all. He only saw Pope, Kie was on the phone with her parents, and John B and Sarah were on the hammock.

“Where’s Y/n?” JJ asked.

“She said she was going to the beach. I’m guessing she isn’t lying ‘cause she didn’t take the twinkie” Pope said.

You were at the beach. JJ thought for a moment he shouldn’t go there. He thought you needed your space, your peace. But that went out the window when he thought about it longer. He threw the towel into the room he stays in and walked to the beach.

He got there quicker than you did because he was running. But he saw your silhouette, he breathed in and out and sat next to you. Looking at the water with you.

“Beautiful isn’t it?” you ask.

JJ just nods. The silence killing the both of you inside.

“JJ”

He hums.

“Why’d you break Jayden’s nose?” you ask, looking at him. JJ hung his head low after that sentence. There were so many things he wanted to say. But he couldn’t.

“Sarah said he was Jayden, and I thought about your bruise. And remember the words he told you. I just had a switch inside me. And once I hit him, I knew there was no going back.”

You sigh, “I don’t need you to fight my battles for me JJ. I can handle them by myself”

“I know that. I wasn’t thinking. I’m sorry.” He apologizes, finally looking you in the eyes.

The two of you were quiet, just looking at each other. He never explained why he was so rough to you. He needs you to know why.

“Y/n”

You hum.

“The reason why I treated you like shit was that I liked you. A lot. Too much even” JJ confesses. Of course, it was for a stupid reason, you thought.

“I don’t want this to sound like, ‘when a boy is mean to you, it’s because they like it’ but-” He pauses. “You know my mom walked out on me pretty young. You know I’ve known Big John and John B for like, ever. So when Big John disappeared, I felt like he walked out on him.”

You don’t say a word, letting him have his moment.

“And I had these girlfriends that either cheated on me or randomly left. So I started to just, hook up with people. I was okay with them being meaningless. And then you came along and- you changed everything for me. You weren’t like the rest of the kooks. You were nice and sweet. You were smart and beautiful. You have a future. And you still have those things in you but. I didn’t. I don’t even think I still do.”

A tear comes down his face and when you go to wipe it away, he stops you, nodding slowly.

“I knew I liked you, John B knew, Pope knew, Kie knew. Maybe even Sarah knew. But I also knew that you were too good for me. That I didn’t deserve you. So when you first started being nice to me, I thought if I would push you away hard enough, you would realize how bad I am. It didn’t work in the first year. But then I saw this switch in you, and I knew it did from that moment.”

He breathes in and out.

“I know I pushed you too far. I’m truly sorry for what I did to you. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to forgive myself for it. And I’m not excusing my behavior. I just wanted you to have the information before I go further with this”

He pauses for a moment, thinking of what he should say next. One thing about JJ is that he gets into his head too much, and this was one of those moments.

“Just say what you feel, J” you reassure him. JJ looks at you and nods.

“I really like you, Y/n. I’ve never felt this way about anyone before. You make me nervous and you make me want to just, keep you safe from the world when i know you can take care of yourself. You make me feel like I have a future in store. Maybe this is love, I don’t know. But if this is love, I don’t want to feel this way with anyone else but you” he confessed.

You look at him, his eyes so soft.

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to. But I am willing to try this if you are too. I want to be around you all the time. I want to hug you and kiss you every time I see you. I to be able to call you to mind. I want to show you off to the world. I want you, Y/n.”

The silence is back again, and it bothers JJ more than anything. He can’t read your mind. With the way you’re looking at him, this could mean you’ll give him a chance, or that you’ll reject him.

You nod at him, “I want you too, JJ.” you whisper.

JJ’s eyes changed, from being so fearful to being hopeful.

“You want me too?” he asks

You nod, a smile on your face.

“You want me too?” JJ repeats, a wide and goody smile on his lips.

You laugh at him, “yeah”

JJ laughs a bit and grabs your face and pulls you in for a kiss. For a hard, hungry, meaningful kiss. He smiles into it and you smile back.

When his lips leave yours, he starts to smother you with kisses all over your face, causing you to giggle and laugh loudly.

“I can’t wait to show everyone that you’re mine and mine only,” JJ says more to himself. You giggle at him, “hold your horses. I want a date first” you say

“A date?”

You nod, “okay, where?” he asks, his arm wrapping around your shoulders.

“Anywhere, you could take me to McDonald’s. I just want that me and you, where one doesn’t end up leaving the other. And we don’t argue”

JJ laughs and nods his head. “Deal”

You smile at him, he’s listening to you with no further statements or anything to come back with. You give him a peck on the lips and then lean your head on his shoulder. Watching the waves with him as he leans his head against yours. “I could get used to this” he whispers, kissing the top of your head before leaning again.

You smiled, not saying another word to him. This was the silence you loved, the comfortable silence. Now, this was something you could get used to.

again I'm sorry this is so late and so long :(

#jj maybank #jj maybank fanfiction #jj maybank x reader #jj maybank x fem!reader #jj manybank x y/n #jj maybank imagine

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