#i like this meme because i can do the same pose with completely different moods its good practice

[acetechne]

4a oli

the other day i was doing my usual hypothetical "oh when we meet in toronto on a fantasy vacation we will go to the tim hortons innovation cafe" with friends and then of course i went to find pictures and its closed permanently because all the business people left the financial district or whatever so this is Ol mourning the loss of his dream doughnuts, moment of silence please

[delusion-of-negation]

top 10 (ish) ridiculous or annoying FAQs:

(click at your own discretion)

1) "kids today rely on others to do everything"

ah yes, damn those participation trophies! if it wasn't for them my hands wouldn't be fucked, and I wouldn't need people to write for me. but seriously, stop reading boomer comics, and go outside to meet some actual young people.

2) "sus that a non-american says mom"

yeah, because it's clearly the superior version, and I'm not too patriotic to concede a defeat.

3) "sweaty, the victims of abuse by catholics are real people, stop appropriating their pain just because you want to hate catholics; plus teachers abuse people just as often anyway"

so firstly, I don't hate anybody. and secondly, regarding the fact that victims really do exist, [insert "of course I know him, he's me" meme here]; although I don't often talk much about the abuse I went through or what my religious beliefs are. but, more importantly, statements like "survivors are people" can be phrased like "some people are survivors", and when you're unable to act according to the latter (like when you don't even consider that somebody might be one) then you display a failure to recognise the former - you're projecting; a survivor can't be appropriating their own pain, but you can be appropriating it to silence one. and thirdly, teachers do abuse - the problem isn't and has never been purely religion, rather that abuse is often done by somebody in a position of trust, power, and familiarity; and that the lack of a global minimum enables totally legal abuse on top of the illegal stuff. people with access and respect have more opportunity to abuse than those without, and that goes for teachers too. but, once again, you can be appropriating the pain of survivors to deflect and silence people. please remember this before you say that shit.

4) "get help/therapy"

way ahead of you - years ahead of you. but it's not magic - people who say this often act as if you'll start behaving differently overnight. not only are some things simply beyond the ability of talking therapy to completely rectify, it also takes time and has to be selective. you've got to pick your priorities, and that's definitely not whatever ship or joke you're mad at me about today. therapy is a slow, arduous process that can't guarantee results - it isn't "anti-recovery" to recognise that, it's honesty. while I've been in therapy for a long time, it is not necessarily going to change whatever you don't like about me - whether that's because it can't, because my focus now is on more important or urgent things, or because I don't want to change that.

5a) "tell your family you ship incest, see how that goes; normal people find it disgusting"

actually, some know, and they're fine with it. in fact, one prefers sibling pairings in fiction to all other dynamics because, to paraphrase, "it's a deeper level of messed up co-dependence". so unfortunately for you, my remaining family (by which I mean those not dead or cut out of my life after abuse and so forth) actually are able to distinguish between fiction and reality. plus, my reasoning for caring if they find it gross or not pertains only to recommending books and such - their opinions do not dictate my tastes.

5b) "don't sexualise/appropriate incestuous abuse" and "I bet you enjoyed being raped" and other attempts to upset me over 5a

firstly, as I've already said here, survivors can't be appropriating ourselves. in addition, you're not owed people's history or trauma - it's not okay to require people's personal information, or else you'll send anon hate and accusations of appropriation. secondly, I'm not sexualising our abuse (not just because I write horror, and so a lot of my writing is intended to be creepy, not sexy); these stories aren't about us, they're not us at all. entire dynamics/people (fictional or otherwise) aren't all going to be applicable to us or identical to us, just because they have something in common with us; they're not us and they're not accountable to us. thirdly, the fact that people send this stuff (attempting to trigger people's trauma over ships) is so much more worrying to me than somebody making our communal imaginary friends kiss. you're trying to hurt people. and finally, to the "I bet you enjoyed it" crowd (if you're at all serious): do you think you'd enjoy being in a real zombie apocalypse, alone, afraid, and really at risk of being eaten alive? a fictional scenario does not feel remotely the same as a real one. this isn't rocket science - things that look like you aren't you; fiction isn't reality; don't send anon hate. (edit: comparable "just leave me alone, I'm not hurting anyone" sentiments for yandere stuff, and anything else you decide I'm naughty for.)

6) "you'll be sent off to do manual labour once your communist revolution happens"

while I don't know why people think that I'm a communist, a dictatorial regime probably isn't going to want me to do manual labour. they're more likely to just shoot me; I'm useless and a liability. call me crazy, but something tells me that "ah yes, we shall give ze deranged cripple ze power tools" isn't the communist position.

7a) "they/them can't be singular pronouns"

yes they can, and they're used as such in both shakespeare and the bible. but you don't have to say this - I'm also okay with he/him, so you could've just used those and chilled out. also, do I look like somebody who views the rules of grammar as fully immutable and imperative?

7b) "enbies/aros/pan/etc aren't valid"

do you really think that you're going to change any hearts or minds by putting that in my ask box or under my funny maymays? chill out, it's not worth the effort - you could be planning a party (in minecraft) and having fun instead. it isn't worth my time to rant at everybody who's saying something isn't valid, updating how I'm explaining it as my opinions grow and general discourse around it evolves; I'm just who I am, somebody else is who they are - why bicker in presumptuous ways about if that's enough? it ultimately is valid, in my opinion, but that isn't an invitation to keep demanding that I debate. (edit: old posts of mine probably don't phrase things incredibly, on this or anything... I tried.)

8) "what are your politics?"

my politics are informed first and foremost by the knowledge that I'm not cut out to be some kind of leader - I don't want to be the guy who tells everyone else what to do, I just offer what seem to me like valid criticisms of how we are doing things now, and general pointers on the values and ethics that I would prefer to move towards. things like individual freedom, taking the most pacifist route where possible, trying not to give excessive power to small groups of people (governments or corporations), helping those in need even when they're not palatable, and letting me suck loads of dicks. but please refrain from decreeing me something - there's not enough information in what I said, so you'll just be filling in the blanks with assumptions. (edit: workplace democracy seems cool to me; benefits are good; fair fines and taxes; and the "sperm makes you loopy" saga: 1, 2, 3, and 4.)

9) "you're a narcissist"

no, I don't meet the diagnostic criteria. joking on the internet that you're hot doesn't make a person a narcissist. the fact that I've chosen to keep my actual self-esteem issues to myself is not proof that they don't exist - you're just not entitled to that information about me. but it's also not narcissism to really like how you look. (edit: don't throw labels around carelessly too.)

10a) "kin list?"

the fabric of the universe, a zombie, dionysus, maned wolf/arctic fox hybrid, a comedian, big gay, big rock, ambiguously partial insincerity. (edit: kin list may or may not be incomplete.)

10b) "kin isn't valid/that's just being insane"

haven't we established that I'm deranged, and that sending stuff like this on anon is simply a waste of your precious time? besides, I do not care if it's invalid or insane - it's fun, I'm happy. (edit: see 7b for my opinion on sending me yet another ask with "that's invalid" in it; I'm not in the mood to discuss the nature of validity.)

bonus: "it gets better" and "trigger list?"

as I've said before, things just don't always get better for everyone - sometimes things can't be cured or even treated, sometimes they kill you; in some cases it could get better if not for a blockade or lack of time. the world is messy. it needs to be more normalised to reassure or comfort people without relying on saying that their issue will get better or be cured. it does suck to be this ill, but it also sucks to be made out to be a lazy pessimist, just because I have the audacity to not play along. and as for the trigger list, I don't like providing people with an easily accessed list of ways to hurt my feelings or harm me - upsetting me is supposed to be challenging, and thus rewarding. if you want a cheat sheet then you're out of luck, I'm afraid.

bonus #2: "FAQ stands for frequently asked questions, it doesn't need that s at the end!"

yeah, I know, I just enjoy chaos and disarray.

bonus #3 (edit): "what are your disabilities and how exactly are they incurable and/or deadly?"

again, I don't tell the internet everything about me, especially when it poses a risk, especially not as an easily accessible list for you to refer back to whenever you feel inclined to hurt my feelings. that is understandably a sore subject. (edit: that includes physical health issues btw.)

bonus #4 (edit): "so we shouldn't be critical?"

if it wasn't clear from my answer about politics or my post in general, you can have opinions about things, and you can voice that. it's just not realistic to exist at extremes: to think that you alone should dictate what exists in fiction, or to think that people shouldn't be expressing disdain or criticism of any calibur. say how you feel about things, that's fine, but it's also fine if people find that they don't value your input. plus we're all flawed, we can all be hypocritical from time to time, we all get bitchy, and we all make mistakes, or even knowingly fuck things up. that's important to keep in mind, whether we're talking about the one being criticised or the one doing the criticising - poor choices of words, imperfect tone, or contradictory ideas are inevitably going to happen occasionally.

congrats on reaching the end! if you have, at any point, said one of these to me, you owe a hug to your nearest loved one (once it's safe).

edit: might add more links/bonus points in the future when I think of things, but it's late now. (sorry for links where prior notes in the thread have my old url, that may get a tad confusing; also, not all links are my blog or my op, since it is to illustrate points/vibes, not to self-promo.)

[wingedwarren]

  ❛  oh fuck, i can feel you doing it around my cock. i can feel you – that’s it, baby. fuck yourself on me.  ❜   //cuz he could still be tied down or up....

@meretrixious   ||   meme

     they talked about it. joked about it. remy whispering he wanted to do this a few times and warren, never one to shy away from challenges or from a bit of verbal banter, had dared him. try it, lebeau. see how far you get.      they’d gotten close a few times, inching just a little bit closer to the roles reversing, the goal being the winged mutant to be the one to be laid bare and getting ravished for once. wandering hands, slick fingers in the heat of the moment, or in that warm glow afterwards when warren wasn’t as keen to jump right out of reach. remy purring sweet bullshit that made warren feel way too much like a fucking girl so it was just met with huffing and ‘shut up’. but they both knew where this was supposed to be going, and remy didn’t seem to want to let up on that goal. fucker.

     apparently tonight had been the night. after months of hooking up, casual stuff that was free of any strings for both so it was comfortable, low expectations, no reason to be cutesy about anything they did or didn’t want. they knew what to expect from the other. usually that meant remy was absolutely prepared for warren to blow his mind with sex he’d feel for a few days afterwards.      this time it was different.      the mood, for starters. it wasn’t awkward exactly, and it was probably just a lucky moment on remy’s part to catch warren in a mood that contributed to the situation at hand. just a quick text to know they were both in the same area and twenty minutes later war had been sitting on the balcony of his hotel room, looking a little heated but like an absolute vision. jeans tight, a thin cotton shirt with geometrical print under his leather jacket, the collar popped up. he could show up in anything and make it work, they’d found. but he put effort in tonight, and remy was more than welcoming.      from the get-go it was clear where remy wanted to go with it. and though warren was more than skilled at changing those plans, make the other crave him crawling over him and make him feel exactly why they hooked up so often, this time... he wasn’t doing any of that. he let remy peel his jacket off, kiss his neck, pull the shirt from his jeans to slip open the buttons. hands sliding across his skin, never pausing at the scars but halting when fingers caressed along warren’s new little additions. oh, he’d been more than a little thrilled when he found the piercings, grinning into the hollow behind warren’s ear and making even the angel get a little red on his cheekbones with a well-placed comment about them.      he’d had a surprise for warren. newly purchased. he’d been excited to show him and warren caught on instantly when remy tossed him the bundle of hemp rope, a deep blue colour and he knew immediately there’d gone some research into it -- it was strong, sturdy rope that definitely came from one of the better suppliers.      and warren was always down for a little bit of tying up, of course.

     he’d let remy perch and pose him, undoing his belt so he could work him out of his pants, his underwear, even his socks had to go -- no, keep the shirt on. it’s cute. i promise i won’t get anything on it. warren had no shame in his nudity when he was put on the bed and the other went to work on his ropes. a harness first, hands careful as they drew warren into it, tying until the rope was flat against his skin everywhere, knots in the right places and remy feeling rather pleased with the way he’d put warren’s... assets on display. the nipple jewelry was definitely a good choice.      then his arms. a simple tie to bring them together behind his back, attaching them to the back of the harness. he watched warren pull on them, the way the skin chafed against the rope, how the muscle moved under it in attempts to pull free. no such luck. there was an edge inside warren he tiptoed right that moment, knowing he couldn’t run now if he wanted to, and it showed in his eyes when remy sat on the bed in front of him. was this what he wanted to to? right now? he swallowed thickly.      remy looked hot. shirt undone, jeans open but without letting everything hang out -- warren definitely enjoyed the view. at his hand winking him closer, the angel started awkwardly shuffling over, wings making it surprisingly difficult to keep his balance. thankfully the room wasn’t all that big so in absolute case of emergency he could dig his claws into the cheaply tiled ceiling for support. once he was where remy wanted him, though, the hands on his thighs kept him steady enough to no longer worry about it.

     ‘so pretty,’ remy’d said, making warren grunt with disagreement. ‘don’t say that shit,’ he replied, but all it got him was a hand so close to his face that for a moment he thought remy’d be into choking -- but no, thank fuck he wasn’t. just a touch to shut him up, thumb tracing his bottom lip, pulling just slightly to expose his teeth. like appreciating a beast, something untameable that he’d somehow gotten his hands on. a trophy.      then warren had been subjected to a slow handjob, edging him a few times until his head leaned back, lips wet with saliva and the hotel room filled with panting. that was when remy’d switched tactics, grabbing the lube he’d put on the nightstand for preparation, and when his hand traveled over warren’s thigh to his backside, their eyes met. both hungry for this encounter, remy’s asking silent permission for this next step and warren’s heavy with challenge. it was always risky with him, this moment. sometimes he’d dare remy and the second fingers came even close to him, there had been biting, pulling away to flip remy around on the mattress and take control the way he liked to do.      but he couldn’t quite do that this time. his breath stilled when remy rubbed at him, last chance to back out, warren -- and then eyes squeezed close, brows furrowed and his expression a grimace when two fingers pressed inside him. reluctant. nerves. nostrils flaring. he didn’t like this. he didn’t like that he felt strung out already, everything inside him so tightly wound that it was exhausting.      then there was a soft press of lips to his own, a silent apology and promise they could stop whenever warren wanted. it did little to soothe him, but oh, a soft sound escaped him when remy paired the invasion with other administrations. tongue and teeth on warren’s throat, a warm hand stroking his erection to help him distribute his focus. the fingers moved, aware of the squeezing each time he went in to the last knuckle, but even that faded with a bit of effort. he just needed warren to relax, to figure out that remy wouldn’t subject him to something he hated.      and it wasn’t that warren hated this. he did, but not because it wasn’t pleasurable to him. he just... god, he expected pain around every corner, degrading words to add salt to the wounds. he had a high tolerance for that kind of bullshit, but not when he was tied up and all he could use to say no were his words. words weren’t his strongest feat, after all.

     ‘are you ready?’ remy whispered to his neck, nibbling at him, tasting the salt on his skin, and warren’s confirmation was breathless, a little wheezy. the quiet moment of being left alone while the other worked on everything he needed left warren in a bit of a daze, tumbling between wanting this and wanting to give a jerk of his body until he was on the floor, claws digging at the hardwood under him. thoughts were right about the spiral out of control when remy was right back with him, touching his body, fingers toying with the ring through his nipple to get his attention back to the present. tugging a little to get him to sit up on his knees, give remy a bit of space to finally push his pants and boxerbriefs down.      warren didn’t even look. knew he’d probably chicken out if he did. but with closed eyes he listened to softly whispered words of comfort, the slick sound of remy getting himself ready as well. sucked in a breath when remy’s hand rested on his waist to make him sit back down, feeling him against the curve of his buttocks, eagerly rubbing up to him. fingers hooked into the front of the rope harness to lean the angel forward until remy could trap his lips in a kiss, much more desperate from warren’s end in a search for validation while he felt the hand around him press remy’s arousal closer to him.

     and then remy pushed him back to sit up. slowly. and warren couldn’t bring himself to make a single sound at the intrusion, which also at least meant no complaints for once. no witty remarks, no mean comments to let his personality shimmer through discomfort.      when he was back upright, god, he couldn’t quite find his breath. his adam’s apple bobbed in the faded light from the bedside lamp, chest shimmering with sweat, and a soft, choked sound lingered on the tip of his tongue. only a slight shift of remy under him, the light adjustment of the angle and the drag of him inside warren finally allowed the blond to drag in a rough gulp of air, chest heaving against his restraints. no doubt he was beautiful to watch like this, wings knocking against the ceiling in search of a way to let out everything that was twisting inside him.      to test the waters, remy gave a slow push of his hips upwards and the noise that dripped from warren’s wet lips was something sounding completely foreign to them both, deep and throaty and hoarse. a hand curving around him was all he needed and then remy’s chest was painted with white streaks, the last spurts dribbling lazily along his wrist. oh.      both hands ended up on warren’s thighs, fingertips digging into the straining muscle and plush flesh to guide him, find a rhythm until warren caught on. his head lolled back forward and his blond curls were sticking to his forehead, feet tucked under remy’s thighs for leverage when the pressure of the hands eased so he could move the way he wanted.      it was a slow rhythm. slowly up and slowly back down. no rush at all even if he felt a pang of shame whenever he ground down and could feel remy pulsating inside him. how far were they going to take this? did he want to... did remy want to...? how did he even put it into words without feeling absolutely disgusting? it wasn’t completely unpleasurable, that was for sure, but it was just... not warren’s thing. this. being on the receiving end. was this how others felt with him? that couldn’t be right.      eyes opened faintly when remy spoke up to see his jaw tighten. that wasn’t a face of disgust. warren had seen plenty of those and this wasn’t it. his hips changed angle and the next time he slid down over remy, his eyes shot wide open and he jerked on top of him, knees pressing at the other’s sides and a thread of saliva dripping down from parted lips.      ‘fuck,’ warren croaked, hunched over. remy under him took the next moment to push up with his hips, making that same sensation spark through warren like electricity, prickling all the way from behind his eyes down to the very tips of his toes. and remy was laughing softly down there, doing it again until warren was squeezing so tight even he let out a chuckling ‘ow, ow, stop, don’t do that --’. it was painfully obvious that warren had never been subjected to this kind of pleasure, quickly building up already.

     the ceiling was already ruined, claws having pushed through the tiles to find the steel skeleton hidden there to hold onto with his claws, the material already ever so lightly deforming under the pressure.      ‘just breathe,’ remy told him, hand stroking the curve of his torso, feeling the skin ripple from how he was leaning forward, but then he did it again and warren just couldn’t, a whine as a reply to his ridiculous request. warren didn’t feel ridiculous very easily but like this he definitely did: face red, the blush blotching on his neck and chest, and he couldn’t even find the action he needed to take to stop drooling, mouth feeling dry and a throat like sandpaper.

[samesanegirl]

100 Otp Questions - Scorose Edition🌹🦂

the-moon-dust-writings

1. Who loves flower crowns more? - Rose

2. Who is the one who likes to cuddle? Both

3. Who has awful taste in music? Rose likes R&B and Dream Pop while Scorpius likes old and jazz music. You decide!

4. Who is the meme lover? Scorpius

5. How did their second date go? They went to dine at Diagon Alley and had a great time. Rita Skeeter published an article entitled “Potential Death Eater dates Rose Weasley. Is it true love or the effects of Amortentia?” Rose egged her house the day after

6. How many children do they want/have? Rose would want 2-4 kids while Scorpius is comfortable with 2. 

7. Who hides the weapons? Rose

8. Who is the better dancer? Scorpius, he probably had ballroom classes when he was younger

9. Do/Did they have a theme wedding? Quidditch themed

10. What do their parents think of them dating? Draco and Astoria love Rose as she helped Scorpius grow (Lucius and Narcissa are not impressed.) Hermione and Ron are happy but he is moody that he is now in-laws with Draco

11. Are they a super sappy couple? They show minimal PDA when they are in public. However, they are kinda sappy when they are alone

12. How did they get together? Scorpius saved Rose in a Quidditch game when she was knocked off her broom. She realised she loved him in that moment and kissed him

13. Who asked the other to get married? Scorpius, although Rose was planning a proposal as well

14. Who stays up too late and makes stupid jokes? Both

15. Who is the nerd? Both

16. Who knows the most obscure facts? Rose. She learned some from Hugo

17. Who makes the other a flower crown? Rose as Lily Luna taught her

18. Who likes to read? Both

19. Who bothers the other person while the other person reads? Scorpius

20. Who tutors the other? Scorpius tutored Rose on astrology and potions. Rose tutored Scorpius on ancient runes and muggle studies

21. Do they have similar taste in movies? Yes. They like psychological thriller, crime-mystery and foreign films

22. How do their personalities compliment each other? When emotional, Rose can be quite impulsive and hot tempered. It takes a lot for Scorpius to punch someone out of anger. So he keeps her in check. Scorpius craves acceptance from the Wizarding World, and Rose offers him that and never questions his morality. Rose needs someone who is open and honest. Someone who loves her instead of her ‘Golden Girl’ image. Scorpius has never seen her through those lenses. They offer comfort, support and acceptance. Their determination and ambition match, so they support each other’s dreams

23. How do they tell everyone that they are going to be having a kid/adopting a child soon? They reveal the news at The Burrow at a birthday/Christmas/New Year’s Eve

24. Who has better fashion sense? Scorpius 

25. Who will punch someone out if they are rude to their partner? Rose

26. What songs do they sing together in the vehicle? The Weird Sisters’s biggest hits. They do end up singing Muggle songs once Scorpius learns the lyrics from Google

27. What other couple would your otp get along with? Jim & Pam, Jake & Amy, Aragorn & Arwen, Elio & Oliver and Mr & Mrs Smith

28. Who likes to prank the other? Rose

29. Who is the one who loves to take pictures? Both, but Scorpius takes more than Rose.                                                                                                 30. How would they react if they found out they were soul mates? Scorpius would cry with tears of joy. Rose would shrug and say she knew all along.   

   31. Where would they live? I never imagined them living in Malfoy Manor, due to their bad memories of their family feuds. They would live around the luscious forests in England where they are surrounded by nature.

32. What type of dragon would they own, if they could have one? They would adopt a Antipodean Opaleye. However, Rose would beg Scorpius to let her adopt an Ukrainian Irobelly and a Swedish Short-Snout

33. If they were both vampires, what type of vampires would they be? Rose would be a dhampir and Scorpius would be a moroi

34. What would they dress up as, for Halloween? Mr & Mrs Smith or James Bond and Vesper Lynd

35. Can they name each other’s favourite food? Yes. Rose loves ratatouille and Scorpius loves risotto

36. Do they have pet names for one another? Rose: Rosie, Rosebud, Weasley, Weasel, Mi Amor & Love. Scorpius: Scorp, Scorpion, Scorpy, Malfoy, Darling, Baby, Idiot & Dickhead.                                                                         37. How do they cheer each other up? Scorpius would give massages, bubble baths and would throw Rose on his shoulder until she laughs. Rose would cuddle him and roast any of the people who are responsible for putting him in such mood

38. Do they show a lot of PDA? Scorpius is a reserved guy and Rose respects that. They show minimal PTD such as holding hands, forehead kisses, quick kisses and putting their arm around each other.

39. How old were they when they got together? In their sixth year, Rose was 16 and Scorpius was 17.

40. Who is the one that would bring the puppy home? Rose. She’s a cat person but she knows how much Scorpius wants a dog

41. Can they do yoga couple’s poses? They are badass Quidditch players. I’m sure they can handle any curveball being thrown at them.

42. What is their song? A Song For You - Donny Hathaway (Scorpius’ favourite song)

43. What does their room look like? Rose would decorate their room with fairy lights and meaningful photos. Scorpius would paint their room blue and include arm chairs where they can both relax. Both of them would have bookshelves on their room so they could read.

44. Who would be the one to kill zombies while the other keeps them grounded? Rose kills the zombie while Scorpius keeps her grounded

45. Who makes the other breakfast in bed? Scorpius.

46. Who loves kids more? Rose

47. Do either of them have a crazy ex? Surprisingly, Scorpius’ exes are quite chill, and they leave the relationship on civil terms. Rose’s ex is possessive and jealous.

48. What are their favourite colours? Rose is lavender, while Scorpius is blue

49. Who likes to cook? Scorpius

50. Who is the forgetful one? Scorpius

51. Does either of them know how to fight? Scorpius is better at duels than physical violence. On the other hand, Rose is fierce with hexes and could dropkick the fuck out of you.

52. What do they do for Valentines Day? They would go to a nice Muggle restaurant, not wanting to be bombarded with the Wizarding press

53. Who swears more? Rose

54. Who has the better comebacks? Rose. But Scorpius has sarcastic comebacks up his sleeve too.

55. Who would start a fight with another parent at a bake sale? Rose

56. Who reads buzzfeed? Rose likes the quizzes

57. Who is the hopeless romantic? Scorpius

58. Do either of them know how to do a handstand? Rose

59. Who can rap better? Rose since she listens to it more

60. Do either of them want to go sky diving? Rose because she loves being in the air

61. What do they usually text about? They text about their weird work stories

62. Who is the dramatic one? Most people would say Rose due to her energetic personality but Scorpius has had his share of dramatic moments

63. Is either one confrontational? Rose when she’s had enough of your shit

64. What is their favourite cuddle position? Honeymoon hug and Rose sitting on his lap with their arms around each other

65. Who are their favourite musical artist(s)?” Scorpius - Donny Hathaway, Etta James & Ray Charles. Rose - H.E.R, Clairo, The Weird Sisters and Lana Del Rey

66. What are their parenting styles? Rose would be affectionate but would remain a strict parent. She would be teaching her kids life advise and guide them on a good path while still acting adventurous around them. Scorpius might actually spoil his kids but will be very stern when they are in trouble. He would make sure that they listen to Rose and never disrespect her

67. Who would be the more laid back one? Scorpius is very cool-headed around stressful times, but Rose is more laid-back when she is socialising

68. Who listens to more vulgar music? Rose, probably

69. Do either of them have secrets even the other doesn’t know? That Rose’s first crush was Teddy Lupin when she was a kid and that she dated Viktor Krum’s son for a while. Scorpius would not tell Rose that the Malfoy's were partially responsible for Hermione’s torture

70. Who is their go to couple for a double date? Albus, of course

71. Do they tip the waiter/waitress on their date? No

72. How do they work out a fight? They have different temperaments so nothing can be too intense. They try to be very calm about it and balance their reasons with logic and emotional until they come to an agreement. If its a small fight, they shag afterwards

73. Who brings home an illegal pet? Rose would bring a baby dragon and a Hippogriff on the same day

74. What side of the bed do each of them sleep on? Scorpius left and Rose right

75. What is their favorite photo of them two together? Their first kiss at a Quidditch match. One where Scorpius playfully picks up Rose in The Burrow and several photos of them and Albus when they are travelling Europe

76. Who takes longer in the bathroom? Scorpius

77. Who has more songs on their ipod? Rose

78. What movie did they first see together? Star Wars with the Weasley-Potter clan

79. What do they like to see each other in? Rose likes to see Scorpius either in a tuxedo or topless. Scorpius likes to see Rose in a Montrose Magpies sweater because it annoys her

80. Who makes jokes during inappropriate times? Rose. And Scorpius feels guilty of laughing.

81. At what age do they discuss the possibility of children? After they are at the peak of their careers. Realistically, around 28 years old

82. What do they love about each other the most? Rose loves that Scorpius is kind and very respectful. She loves that he completely understands her and always supports her decisions. Scorpius loves Rose’s warm nature and her willingness to cheer people up when they are down. He also loves her adventurous spirit and never gets bored when he’s with her

83. Who is the one that sees the big picture, while the other focus’s on the small details? Rose sees the big picture while Scorpius focuses on small details

84. What would they write on their partner’s social media’s for their anniversary? Scorpius would post photos of Rose and write a paragraph about how much she changed his life. Rose would post an embarrassing photo of Scorpius (like when his ice cream cone fell on his pants) and says how much she loves him

85. Who is bad at math? Rose

86. Who googles everything? Scorpius

87. Who does stuff on impulse? Rose. Luckily Scorpius is always present

88. How do they comfort each other when they are helpless to do anything about the situation? Rose would just cuddle Scorpius and try to lift his mood by suggesting a playful Quidditch game. Scorpius would listen to her and would offer a massage to relieve stress

89. What is an inside joke they have? Dirty minded jokes

90. Who makes the other smile with almost no effort at all? Rose

91. What is their favourite holiday? Rose loves Christmas and Scorpius loves New Year’s Eve

92. Who is the one that is calm and collected while the other is angry and destructive? Scorpius is the calm one and Rose is the impulsive one

93. What is their favourite board game to play? Wizarding chess and exploding snap (not a board game but still

94. Who accidental sets something on fire? Rose when she loses her temper

95. Who has the car ready while the other is robbing the store? Since Rose has a Muggle license, Scorpius would have to rob the store

96. What artist/group did they go to for their first concert? The Weird Sisters

97. Who sleep talks? Scorpius

98. Who is the more social one? Rose. Scorpius is more quiet and reserved

99. What are their karaoke songs? Any songs from The Weird Sisters

100. Who would get up on stage and make a fool of themselves just to make the other laugh? Both

[sleeplessvalley]

y'know I think if all my variations of tartar wound up somehow being able to meet each other (under a readmore because this is LONG)

tartar:

gets along well with 2.0, since they're basically the same but do have some differences

really doesn't like taeden since he did get the prime directive accomplished but did it in a way that left the world intact

would be somewhat disappointed in teremun for going through with his plans but getting depressed over it later, because 'are you kidding me how could an attachment to people make you REGRET THE THING WE'VE BEEN WORKING TOWARDS AND FINALLY ACCOMPLISHED'

is surprisingly neutral towards meme au taeden despite him going on a good path; considers his actions reasonable

refuses to interact with tasnim if he can avoid it, for reasons unknown (with the reason being that it actually makes him sad to see a version of himself that never went for such an extreme solution)

very firm in his belief that pokemon au taeden and tartar could've done great things had they not split up. also not a fan of the fact that he's apparently brothers with taeden here, and is a bit surprised that pokemon au tartar is so calm yet so intimidating sometimes (though he’d never tell that last bit)

not sure what to feel towards taiko

2.0:

considers it an honor to be able to talk to tartar despite just about knowing the same stuff

doesn't understand how he and taeden wound up so different despite having come about almost the same way

sort of gets why teremun got depressed over what he did, but still thinks that he should be happy that he achieved the goal

not very interested in meme au taeden, but thinks his tech is worth learning about

also not very interested in tasnim, but the process of growing his own body and then transferring himself into it is very much worth learning about

just the tiniest bit afraid of pokemon au taeden and tartar

wants to understand taiko's sanitization process better

taeden:

feels sorry for tartar, but knows he can't be swayed

really wants to take 2.0 apart for what he did to percy

tries to stay neutral towards teremun, but does like him some- upset that he went through with the original plan, but somewhat proud knowing he recognized what he did was shitty. wants to help him but hasn't figured out how to reverse the sanitization process yet either

would probably deck someone for meme au taeden. also horrified that he doesn't have a professor

gets along best with tasnim since he never went down such an extreme path; probably asks what him it's like being an octoling

pokemon au taeden and tartar bug him a bit because to him their plan almost feels worse than the plan tartar had. outside of that he doesn't mind them though and actually wants to know why they have creatures from a game that his professor used to talk about

taiko actually freaks him out; will avoid him at all costs

teremun:

tartar scares him a bit because he's generally uncaring about the lives of others

the same applies for 2.0 but to a slightly lesser extent

treats taeden with a LOT of respect- he understands that it takes a lot to change your ways. probably winds up venting to him because he'll get it.

a bit confused as to why meme au taeden is an octoling, but also treats him with respect. willing to sit and listen to him ramble about older tech, and winds up mentioning bits of his own story by accident

tasnim reminds him too much of pravin (teremun's percy) and he can't handle it, so he doesn't interact with him

he's able to talk to both pokemon au taeden and tartar, though he's a bit uneasy since their plan reminds him of his own. still winds up talking about what happened with him.

taiko makes him sad, but he'll still talk to him. he wishes he could've loved like that from the start.

meme au taeden:

not a fan of tartar at all, since he clearly can't see how bad he's making things for others

also not a fan of 2.0 for the same reasons

thinks taeden is literally the best thing ever, since he knows a lot about older tech and he likes to work with older tech. they probably bond over this, and he asks him about what his professor is like

really hopes that teremun can eventually find a way to reverse everything he did, or at least bring it all to a bearable point- if he was able to get out of his own bad situation, hopefully he can too

surprised that there's another octoling, but with the mind of a machine- extremely interested in how tasnim accomplished this

knows that pokemon au taeden and tartar's plan was bad but.... he can't stop his curiosity over what they were going to use to change the world.......

unsettled by taiko, but still makes an effort to be friendly towards him. probably winds up getting infected tbh

tasnim:

very happy he didn't go down tartar's path

or 2.0's for that matter

taeden's company is enjoyable and he also asks him about what it's like being in a robot

cries over the information obtained about teremun. he feels REALLY bad for him despite knowing he did some bad stuff

asks way too many questions about octarian society to meme au taeden. yes he's seen it but he wants to know more from someone who's been in it. probably cries a bit here as well

pokemon au taeden and tartar are very different than the rest for the most part and he thinks that’s neat that they share something in common with him

is completely unaware that taiko also tried to infect him but it didn't work

pokemon au taeden and tartar (both generally share the same opinions on others so they’re getting lumped together)

tartar’s plan seems very extreme to both of them, which is actually kind of hilarious considering one of them was trying to change the world through some concerning means. willing to talk to him provided they’re in a good mood beforehand.

kind of worrying to them that 2.0 continued down the same path with very little change outside of a mildly stronger curiosity. still easier to talk to than tartar though.

both are absolutely fascinated by taeden, since he’s an AI but runs on his own and even learns stuff. nothing like that exists in the pokemon world yet, at least nothing that isn’t controlled by a rotom. they probably talk to him for a while about robot stuff

teremun’s situation reminds both of them of what nearly happened in regards to changing the world, except that his situation actually happened. they’re not sure what to do aside from trying to console him, but outside of that they all get along

octillery person? what? they’re so confused by meme au taeden and ask a lot of questions he doesn’t actually have the answers to. they’ve got a lot of different tech and they all talk about that stuff

another octillery person but apparently he’s also a machine? confused with tasnim as well, probably more than they are with meme au taeden.

they both consider taiko to be like... a living version of the move attract. these two probably also get infected by him

taiko:

Not suitable for infecting. Potentially dangerous, but plan is being carried out in a manner that’s deemed acceptable, therefore poses no threat.

Not suitable for infecting. Potentially dangerous, but curiosity and obtaining answers seems to be the priority, therefore poses little threat.

Not suitable for infecting. Terrified of the virus, it seems. Speaks of the professor fondly. (Miss him.)

Not suitable for infecting. Depressed. Poses no threat whatsoever due to wanting to be better.

Suitable for infecting. Target is wary but optimistic. Obsessed with older technology. Lure target in with questions and/or facts about old tech to lower guard. Infect the moment the opportunity arises.

Suitable for infecting. Target is oblivious and very emotional. Lure target in with the story regarding the professor. Infect at any point during the conversation. Not suitable for infecting. Has the mind of a machine.

Suitable for infecting. The quiet one is very perceptive. The rambling one has sensitivity to sound. Do not allow voice to waver. Infect the quiet one the moment the opportunity arises. Raise voice to 100dB to startle the rambling one. Infect within two seconds.

[cutegirlmayra]

Hey, since you mentioned wanting to write a story where Modern and Boom Sonic switch with each other because they like the other's Amy more, why not I send this as a prompt so you get to finally write it? :))

I remember saying this but… Is my ability able to fully capture the hilarity and adorableness that is Sonic switching his gf for the same gf but differently designed?

It’s like that one meme…

Also- PROMPTS ARE STILL ON SHUTDOWN! That has not changed so please, don’t send me anymore until I reopen them again or please pay one dollar to have yours worked on at once! I’m just trying to get through them all I still have a ton left. T-T I want to reopen them for you hungry shippers out there but I need to complete the ones I already have to do that!

Thank you for supporting me and patiently awaiting your prompts to be written. I’m doing my very best!

Prompt:

It wasn’t long after the two Sonics realized something…

This new world was fantastic! Boom!Sonic didn’t want to leave and Modern!Sonic wanted more time in the alternate dimensional world.

At first, it was simply for the ‘new adventure’ that they both felt but one day, Boom!Sonic lost his bandana during a chase, securing the ‘strange magical emerald’ and having landed on his back after falling through several levels of branches on a tree.

“Offph! That’s… gonna hurt in the morning.” He sounded as though he had accepted that fate, but smiled at the green emerald in his hands. “Guess this means I can go home, and Other Sonic can come home.” He slowly got up, but felt a huge pain soar up his back and linger on his shoulder blades.

“Ahhh… yep! Yep, that one hurt.” he groaned as he tried to fight through the pain and stand up.

Hunched a bit to push off with his hands, he suddenly heard a cry and looked around. “What was that? Sounded like…”

“….ooniiiccc!”

“Amy?”

“…..iiicc!”

It was growing fainter, and that’s when Modern!Sonic contacted him on the invention Tails gave him. “BBBzzzttt…! -Nic! Sonic! Hey, finally got ahold of ya! Who knew dimensional signals were so bad, right?”

“Y-yeah, hold that thought.” Boom!Sonic slowly got up, flicking his ear a moment before focusing entirely on finding who was calling his name.

It sounded like Amy, but he hadn’t seen this world’s Amy before…

“What’s up?” Modern!Sonic inquired as Boom!Sonic fought through his back pain and sped up.

Finally reaching the sound, he peeked around a tree where…

The sunlight beamed on a beautiful girl in a red dress, looking worriedly as she held a hand daintily to her chest. Though he couldn’t see her face fully, he noticed her backless dress and platform boots.

“Hey, don’t ignore me!” Modern!Sonic had waited a bit for a response, but after tapping his foot for so long, he grew impatient. “What’s the hold-up?”

“That’s-!” Boom!Sonic stuck his whole face out when he noticed her turn her face.

It was Amy! But she was more girly in this world. Her dress flared out into a quaint little hoop and she was calling out his name.

“Sooooooonnniiicc!” She cupped her hands over her mouth and let the sound travel, shaking some trees in the amount of wind that blasted out.

His quills were ruffled and he closed his eyes. “Yep, that’s Amy.” he mused, “Still able to project.”

“Amy!?” Modern!Sonic looked visibly flustered, as though reflexing to hide. “W-why are you with Amy..?”

This world’s Amy tilted her head, looking absentmindedly to the sky and lifting a hand to her ear, trying to listen for a response. “Ohhhh, who am I kidding.” she pouted, slouching a bit. “He never responds back… I’ll have to find him myself!” She cheered instantly up, mesmerizing Boom!Sonic for a moment at how inexplicably cheery this Amy seemed to be.

Maybe she wasn’t a hot, emotional mess this time around?

“I heard her calling me… rude to not show up, right?” Boom!Sonic smiled a bit goofily off to the side of his face, but Modern!Sonic saw the shift and frowned, lowering his eyes.

“Hey, focus on the stakes here. Amy will be fine once I’m back.” He said that… but took a second to look back at this other dimension’s Amy.

She was speaking with the team, and smiling and acting rather mature and chill.

He tilted his head a second, smiling casually as he noticed her laughter and then excited expression. She wasn’t focused squarely on him at all. She was in her own little world and living her life without a care in the world.

When she looked to him and caught his eye, the two straightened up a second, and then Boom!Amy nervously fidgetted and looked away, stroking her two curled quills against her cheeks.

It was cute, so he crinkled his nose a bit and beamed, closing his eyes and thinking it a rather subtle thing to avoid further attention.

She wasn’t so easy to figure out anymore, and the complexity of her shyness along with taking a second look at him–hoping he wouldn’t notice– made him dote on the difference even more.

Now, granted, both Sonics’ had no intention towards these different Amys. It was all just a ‘curious observation’ for the most part. But Boom!Sonic had to get the emerald back to Tails and Knuckles… might as well make sure this world’s Amy is safe and sound too, right?

And Modern!Sonic, he still had to fight off this dimension’s Eggman from causing havoc to the villagers. Fighting alongside this dimension’s Amy and getting to see a different side of Amy wouldn’t damper any plans, now would it?

So, Modern!Sonic took up a bandana. Boom!Sonic never looked for his own bandana.

Boom!Sonic tried his best to swagger over to this Amy, quickly informing Modern!Sonic that it was dangerous for Amy to be out in the woods on her nose like this, and with Modern!Sonic so distracted by the new fashion-statement, he agreed.

Modern!Sonic did fail to mention his ruse to Boom!Sonic, but Boom!Sonic didn’t bother to hide the fact that his bandana was missing…

Modern!Sonic had simply swiped one of his from his room and never corrected anyone when they said ‘Did you guys switch already?’.

Thus, Boom!Sonic met Modern!Amy, and Modern!Sonic got to view Boom!Amy’s many sides a little longer.

“Oh, Sonic! You really came!” In absolute joy, Modern!Amy pounced into Boom!Sonic’s arms.

Now, because he wasn’t expecting this, it did knock the wind out of him and her crushing hold did cause his back pain to spike up again.

“Woah!” Boom!Sonic stiffened, causing Modern!Amy to let go, “Oh, gosh! Are you alright? You look…” she gasped, “Sonic!” Clutching his arms, she looked him over and then sweetly met his eyes. “You’re so filthy and full of leaves! Did you fall? Did Eggman do this to you?”

‘Wow, she’s so caring! I mean, Amy always was, but this one looks like she’s about to cry!’ He nervously chuckled, “Haha… Oh, well, you know. Saving the world and all.” he shrugged, and she thought him acting a little silly.

“Hehe, you certainly are acting your age.” She found it odd how inviting his eyes were, as though he wasn't bothered by her doting attitude today. “For someone who looks like they’d been battling in a dirt pile, you’re still as carefree as always!” she put her hands together, openly praising and admiring him. “Haa~ A working man is always handsome, but the true daredevil’s are the charmers!”

His eyes turned to dots.

She was openly flirting with him!?

He nervously chuckled again, scratching the back of his head. ‘H-how do I respond to that!?’

She giggled, but when he didn’t make an exhausted combat, batted her eyes and stared at him in confusion. “What? No retort today?” she moved closer towards his face at an angle, but he just leaned back, embarrassed at her kind affections.

“…You certainly are in a different mood today.” she placed a finger on her mouth, but then hummed a cheery giggle again. “I like you this way!” she took his hands, pulling him more towards her.

“Yee-eh!” He was surprised by how direct she took his hands and how close she brought him to her… Now he was sweating, wondering if this could all be too much…

“Hmm? A Chaos Emerald?” She curiously felt something in his hand and looked down.

Her hands moving over his gave him a weird sensation. He blushed and looked away, “J-just the normal chores! Haha…ha…”

“Hmm?” She didn’t think Sonic would use that word. “Chores? Since when do you think about domestic living?”

He sweated even more now. ‘Did I blow my cover?!’

“And you’re so tall!” Amy stepped back to see how far she actually had to look.

“Str-stretched my back today! Haha!” He improvised stretching, which was something Sonic might do, but this seemed in a more joking manner.

Amy watched a moment and then smiled with a nod, “That’s more like you!” she then hugged his arm, causing him to lose balance momentarily. “I’ve missed you so much! It’s no fun when you’re gone…” she cooed, rubbing her cheek into his shoulder.

He looked directly forward as he felt her light touch turn to a more sincere cuddle against his arm…

“Gah!~ You keep me waiting for so long, Sonic… Would it be so bad to invite me on more adventures once in a while?” she continued to fake a whine and lean more against him. “Hehe! Have you lost weight? You seem skinner too..” she lightly traced a finger down his arm, moving away a bit, “But I bet that’s from all the working out you’ve done! But you were always my big strong hero, Sonic~ No need to show off now! You’ve already won me over with your handsome smile, silly! Teehee!”

Now Boom!Sonic felt a strange high, hearing so many compliments, not a hint of sarcasm either.

He puffed up his chest. He absorbed every bit of her fawning fangirlness. He took to the stage with a confident air that no one could now strip from his being.

“Well, I can’t let my daring doos overwhelm my dashing looks~” he struck a pose and gave her his best ‘heroic smolder’ that he could manage.

It worked a little too well..,

She blinked a few moments as though stunned he was playing back, but immediately became energized and continued what she felt was ‘working’ and wouldn’t let up.

Although, this Sonic was desperate for Words of Affirmation, and didn’t mind playing up the ‘hero card’ to win some much deserved recongition.

He took her back with him and continued to play charming~

Modern!Sonic had a different approach. Rather than play a role, he was himself, and immediately caught Boom!Amy off-guard by how gentlemenly he could be.

“Watch yourself!” he slid in during an Eggman attack on the village and knocked a robot from hitting her away, coming up behind her and giving her a pleasant wink and smile. “I’ve got your back!”

She blushed, giggling a little crazily as she sunk her head down and tried to hide behind her bouncing shoulders.

“What’s gotten into you today, Amy? You’re completely distracted!” Tails complained, but Amy continued to see hearts as she watched this ‘new and improved’ Sonic take over the battlefield and spark some fun and joy into her life again.

“It’s like… he’s never worried about anything before… so chill and sporty…” she placed a hand on her cheek and sighed into it, her hammer resting on her shoulder and neck.

“She’s out of it.” Tails concluded, unamused at her reaction.

He kept being polite and kind to her on the battlefield, posing without effort and stating heroic lines unrehearsed.

Later, he offered to take Amy home if that’s where she was heading, but she told him she would run beside him instead.

“H-huh?” Modern!Sonic was honestly surprised to hear that. “But… I’m fast.” he pointed to himself, innocently stunned. “I’m speed.” Amy giggled and continued in her answer.

“That way, we can chat about that other world you visited. It seems to have… well, changed you a lot. I’m just curious how it went, is all~” she kicked her foot out a bit and started running, “Besides, since when have I not been able to keep up?”

That sass and spunk was like revving an engine. Sonic gave a crooked smile, raising an eyebrow and charging ahead.

“If you say so!”

“Woah!” Amy was coughing up the dust from his speedy race by her, but she smiled and thought he might be toying with her. “Okay, hotshot. It’s time to knock your ego down a size… again!”

She tried to continue conversation but Modern!Sonic just wanted to test her limits, enjoying seeing her grace as she acrobatically jumped from tree to tre and raced alongside him.

It was almost like a dance, trying to ‘up-stage’ the other. Modern!Sonic liked the sudden rivalry and even praised her at the end, making her once again questioningly look to him.

“Yeah, okay.” she goofily spat out, wiping some loose leaves and dirt off her tight dress.

“What? You don’t believe me?” Sonic folded his arms, tilting his head and squinting his eyes a bit. ‘She really isn’t used to compliments here… is she?’

“Oh, like you really think I did a good job out there.” she thought he was playing her up to some slapstick joke. “Like I really impressed you or something. Har-dee-har-har.”

“…Amy.” Modern!Sonic purposefully adjusted his tone. This made her immediately straighten up and feel the sincerity and seriousness of his voice.

She was startled by it, but acknowledged his address to her by slightly double-taking over her shoulder.

Her eyes wavered nervously but he waited till they finally held at his own, kind expression.

“…You did great out there.” he repeated, this one less excited and more relaxed. “We should race again sometime. It was fun.”

Her face slowly brightened red, and she slapped her hands to her two cheeks in flushed embarrassment. “WHO ARE YOU!?” she exclaimed, causing Modern!Sonic to grip his gut and laugh and laugh and laugh…

When the two Sonic’s finally switched, Boom!Amy knew it wasn’t Boom!Sonic who had charmed her up the whole day, but Modern!Amy was strikingly confused why her tactics that seemed to have worked the day before were now getting her nowhere.

“What happened to you?”

“I met you.” he grinned, winking to her and rubbing a hand over her head. “There’s a lot I don’t know about you, Ames.”

“…Ames?” Modern!Amy wrinkled her brow.

Modern!Sonic just laughed at an inside joke and carried on as Modern!Amy frustratedly followed after him. He still let her hold his arm, but he wasn’t showing-off all handsomely like he did before…

Boom!Amy initiated more races out of Boom!Sonic, who found it hard to break his newly developed ego-ride and learn how to be humble in front of his team again… but Boom!Amy was sure to help him with that…

[dissimulxte]

whatever. do the ship thing with mari and olivier just because.

chaotic? certainly. and goodness knows it’s going to be wild– but goddamn do they look good

ship meme | accepting

send me a pairing and I’ll tell you who:

1. falls asleep on the couch

Both. Either of them tend to trend on the snooze-prone side, and it’s easy to imagine them relaxing right off into a nap when they have the chance to settle in. If Ri happens upon Ollie in such a state, she’ll probably get real close to the other’s face and coo something adoring to wake her up, promptly dodging to avoid any violent response such an awakening earns, or she’ll make a whole drama about “awakening her princess with a kiss’– which she’ll deliver on if Olivier doesn’t jolt up and stop her.

If Ollie finds Mari like this? she just sits/lays on top of her and begets a wheezing ‘good morning to you, too, my lilac’

2. makes friends with the neighbors

Mari might be the first to reach out, but there’s something about her cool, older-sister energy that endears most of the people they meet to Olivier first, unless Ri’s out there really laying on the shmooze for one reason or another. They’re both pretty content for quiet and privacy around the abode, though, so bar the occasional exception, they’re not overly neighborly.

3. is the adventurous eater

I’ll say both, again, to some degree, but Mari might have a slight edge, just because she’s so ready to put anything deemed ‘safely edible’ into her mouth at least once. Ollie doesn’t seem like she’d be too reluctant to try anything, and has the tendency to indulge her little paramour if only to make the thief shut up about it, and is often pleasantly surprised by the result– but now and then there’s just something that is a hard no, and Mari won’t push the issue; she’ll just laugh and enjoy the venture herself.

4. hogs the covers at night

Did you think it would be any different here? Nope. It’s still Mari. That said, she’s an observant one, that Lovelace. It doesn’t take her long to catch on to Ollie’s not-so-fabulous immune system, and she makes a conscious effort to gather the jelly into her arms and under the blankets with her– or, at the very least, lend some her way if she’s not in a cuddly mood. 

5. forgets to do the dishes

Olivier. Or maybe it’s less forgetting, and more of a vendetta after being trapped in a jar for a few weeks. In any case, it’s not so bad, and Mari takes care of it without complaint, or Ollie’ll notice after a time and they’ll tag team the chore to have it done quicker.

6. tries to surprise their partner more often

Mari is always trying to surprise Olivier– pleasant, or not. Pranks are fair game, though she avoids anything vicious, it’s all in good fun (she insists), but it is something sweet more often than not. At first, it’s just another way to try and win a bit more favor from the pirate, or to fluster her and savor the suspicion which comes with every sweet gesture, but it never stops. When they do reach the point of strange, confirmed courting, she keeps it up because… well, why else? she wants to make her happy. 

Ollie can come off a little cold and serious, which isn’t bad, of course, and Mari learns to read her more subtle expressions, but it’s still a goal of hers to draw up real, warm smiles and genuine delight– as much for Olivier as to prove to herself that she can.

7. leaves dirty laundry on the floor

Neither. This is a pair of designers, crafters, artisans we’re talking about here. They do a lot of things, but they’re not prone to leaving anything that needs a wash just lying around. If anything, they both really enjoy the process of laundry; hand-washing what needs it, hanging, folding. It’s a quiet little routine they fall into, even if there’s some debate on the best way to fold certain things.

8. stays up til 2 AM reading

Not necessarily reading, but pouring over patterns and the like can keep Ollie up well past any decent hour-- she just gets lost in it sometimes, you know? A familiar trait, for sure. Mari’s happy to glance over her shoulder from time to time and offer her own two cents; compliments, ideas-- but if it gets to be too late, she’s laying her head against Olivier’s shoulder and rendering one of the jelly’s arms useless by tangling herself around it, “come to bed, dear, it won’t sprout legs and walk off before morning. you’ll make yourself sick at this rate.” It’s harder to just scoff and brush her aside when you can hear real concern on her voice. 

9. sings in the shower

Mari. Quietly, to herself, unless she knows Ollie’s close enough to hear. Then, she’ll try her best to serenade the other, which may be sickeningly sweet and only good for rolling one’s eyes at, or it may earn some laughter and the exhausted shake of her head. 

In any case, Ollie doesn’t stop her from doing it.

10. takes the selfies

Both. At first, Olivier merely indulged Mari’s habit by not pushing her off when the other would crane in to snap a shot, but as it became clear how much Mari liked taking pictures with her, she grows more willing, and eventually starts taking them herself. We all know it would be totally unfair for them to have a couple’s instagram page-- can you imagine? the theming, the sheer beauty. It should be illegal. For every stunning, model-like shot, though, there’s as many ridiculous poses and silly faces, or secret-snaps where one has caught the other in the background completely unaware.

11. plans date night

Olivier. Though Mari certainly drags the other along to plenty of fancy events around town or special evenings that pop up on her well-plugged-in radar, Ollie has the more quiet sensibility to find things that the two of them will enjoy and remember doing together; the more sentimental, dare I say, romantic things. The more removed, the better; group settings are plenty of fun, and the occasional double date with friends to indulge in drinking, games, and the sort definitely becomes a fixture, but a real date is something where they just get to enjoy each other’s company. Where Ri isn’t performing, she’s just her, with the woman who she’s come to love and who has, against her better judgement, come to return the same.

[chivalin]

February Week 8 - April Week 18: Appreciating Other Content Creators Recs (SWTOR)

It has been ages since the last one but since today is “May the Fourth be with you” and swtor fan appreciation day, I decided to pour all my efforts into making this.

I have to apologize though as the comments on these are not as lengthy as in the previous ones but I really wanted to publish this today and also finally get caught up with the recs posts :P. But know that even if your name or work isn’t in here, I still absolutely adore everything I have appreciated in the past!

But anyway, for those new to this, here’s the intro from the very first recs post that explains everything perfectly:

I promised in my New Year’s resolution to spread more positiveness around towards other content creators out there. So -  - here are some of my favorite creators, fics, art and other things - - that I want to appreciate once more. You can find more cool stuff in my Art Appreciation Blog dedicated solely for appreciating others’ contents.

Basically I just want to spread some positiveness around because as a content creator myself, I know how much joy and encouragement even one show of appreciation can bring into people’s lives :)

*

ART

@starryevening - Sith Apprentice

The style is very pleasing to the eye in this and the colors are absolutely fantastic! Everything is so vibrant which makes this such an eye catcher, and I especially love the hair and face so much!

@mirielsart - Revan & Malak

Not exactly full on swtor art, but hey, it’s close enough and I just couldn’t pass by this without including it! The style makes me weep and everything else about this is superb too from the coloring to the poses that end up creating such a strong, emotive piece!

@aspyforthethrone - Sass // Gev // Hunter & Theron & Ewanh

All the characters have been captured perfectly and the style (and the clothes, can’t forget them because, daaamn!) in these is absolutely golden too! I highly enjoy the easily recognizable expressions, and the mood of these pieces is just stunning, especially in the Gev piece!

@tracinyad - Nino

The style is very pleasing and I just love how the face looks! The coloring is superb, I love the blue so much, and I especially love how the hair has been done!

@erinmccomics - OC Fight Week Duel Comic

This comic is absolutely hilarious and I just love how the action moves fluidly from one panel to another! The expressions are also so freaking awesome, making this such a fantastic piece!

@sirenofvathraki - Header Edits

Daaamn, these edits are ridiculously good and it’s such a joy to look at them! Seriously, I absolutely love how these look as the color scheme, composition and practically everything is just so spot on!

@aredheelmahariel - Togruta

This is an absolutely stunning piece that I can’t just seem to drag my eyes away from! The coloring is mesmerizing and I’m so in awe because of it, and damn that gaze is so hypnotizing too!

@skullinacowboyhat - Miraluka Druid // Togruta Monk

I absolutely adore these designs so much as the coloring is superb in both of them and- damn, I just love these so much, alright?? They feel very real and immediately catch my interest whenever I see them!

@dottiechan - Togruta Codzhekel // Togruta Codzhekel Digital

This rec post wouldn’t be complete if I didn’t include these fabulous pieces because my sweet Togruta is in them! I can’t sing praises enough of how much I love both of these and they do Codzhekel more than enough justice, leaving me happily weeping away because of pure awesomeness! (Ty so much once again for doing these <33)

@popiell - Pureblood Natjana // Sith Pureblood/Mirialan Hybrid

Same as above as the first one has my dear Nat in it and she looks absolutely stunning! I love the style in both of these so, so much and can’t help but to just marvel the pure talent and skill that has made it possible to create these pieces! (Also, ty so much once again for doing Nat <33)

@windwyrm - Firebrand Kaliyo

This is such an interesting and very well done piece that I’m definitely in awe! I absolutely love the colors and how perfectly all the different elements work together to create such an interesting and breathtaking piece!

@dingoat - Scourge & Jedi Knight // Torian & Jedi Knight Fight Scene // Torian & Jedi Knight Hug

Such amazing pieces of work that never fail to tell a story on their own! I absolutely love the mood, composition and coloring (aaaand, practically everything, haha) in all of these and I can honestly say that these pieces are just flawless and pure perfection!

@spindlewit - Jedi Consular

The design of this Consular is so pleasing that I can’t help but smile widely whenever I lay my eyes on it! The outfit is superbly done and I really like all the three poses, and I also have to mention how much I just adore the coloring!

@sssamson - Theron & Imperial Agent // Vector Outfit Meme // Torian Outfit Meme

I absolutely adore all of these and their styles so much! They’re so pleasing and interesting to look at and I just love the connection in the first pic while the outfits in the last two are superbly done, not to mention I just adore the top hat wearing killik with Vector!

@viridanlegacy - Metal Fashion Imperial Toons

This is the greatest thing my Finnish eyes have ever laid their gaze on, haha! I absolutely love the design of these characters and the poses are so well executed too, making this piece pure perfection!

@redosjenny - “New Top Nerd”

I adore the expressions and the good, casual mood in this so much! The colors are pleasantly vibrant and it definitely tells a story on its own which is always such a good thing!

@semper-draca - Tarot Card Gimrizh (nsfw for nudity and blood)

This is a very powerful piece of art that is just an absolutely delight to observe! I love all the details and symbolism, and this definitely such a flawless and very well-thought-out piece!

@painedting - Ziost & Sith Inquisitor

The mood in this is ridiculously powerful and I absolutely love how this has been colored too! The face is very well done and damn, the look in those eyes nearly sends shivers down my spine because it’s so intense!

@claudela - Pureblood Outfit Meme (nsfw-ish for mostly bare upper body)

This is- I don’t even have words to describe how awesome this is! Seriously, the outfit is so on point and DAMN THAT CHARACTER is amazingly done and I definitely love how vibrant the colors are!

FIC

@aly-the-writer - Rest (Arcann/Male Jedi Consular)

The style is really fluid and sucks you right in the moment you start reading! I quite adore the chemistry between these characters and how smooth their interactions are, creating such a delightful piece!

@lesabear - Malicineve & Temperamental Astromech // Vharmir & Down Time w/ Theron

Oh man, I can’t praise enough how well the first-person narratives are executed absolutely flawlessly in these fics! They also have such a pleasant, easy to follow paces and the characterizations and humor are very well done too!

@keldae - Phobia (Theron Shan/Female Jedi Knight)

The style in this is so catching and pleasant to read that it makes you devour the fic before you even realize what has happened! The pace flows smoothly from one paragraph to another and I just love the interactions between all the characters!

@talonfics - The Depths of Surrender (Kaliyo Djannis/Female Imperial Agent)

I really, really enjoy this as it’s well-written and the chemistry between the characters is superb! I just love the style and all the cool bits that can be found in here, like the one where they’re kissing in the end!

@fer8girl - Eyes on You (OC/OC) // I Never Mean to Hurt You // Charmed (Torian Cadera/Female Bounty Hunter)

All of these are such enjoyable and delightful reads, I can’t praise them enough! The style is absolutely fluid and I definitely got sucked in because the telling and characters are so interestingly told!

@nerf-burger - A Massage (Felix Iresso/Female Jedi Consular)

Such a sweetly awesome and well-written piece that I can’t help but be in awe! The interactions between the characters are really natural and I just utterly love how Felix is portrayed and how supportive he is!

@cinlat - Forced R&R (Theron/Vector/Female Imperial Agent)

Oh my god, I absolutely love this! The chemistry is so on point between everyone and I have to admit that I definitely fell in love with this pairing while reading this!

@tishinada - Patience (Andronikos Revel/Female Sith Inquisitor)

This has such and excellent style and telling that it’s an absolute joy to read! Andronikos’ portrayal is superb, and I just love the interactions and observations between these two!

@cavalier-life - Caught in a Storm (Theron Shan/Arcann/Female Sith Warrior)

Such an interesting and lovely poly ship that I definitely grew invested in while reading this! The pacing is really nice and smoothly flowing, making this so easy and delightful to read!

@kunoichi-ume - Starships in the Night (Vector Hyllus/Female Bounty Hunter)// 30 Days of Domestic Fluff (Torian Cadera/Female Jedi Knight)

I absolutely love both of these! They’re such superbly written pieces that also have amazing chemistry between all the characters! The style is really great and I have to admit that these being not so common pairings makes me love them even more!

@sassheliosazuras - Snuggling Cat // Jackass Inibri-cat

I just can’t leave these out from here because animals are such a soft spot of mine, especially if they want to snuggle or are the embodiment of Inibri, haha! Seriously though, I enjoy both of these immensely and they make me so happy whenever I even think about them!

@lordviridis - Welcome to Dromund Kaas

Oh maaaaaan, I witnessed this fic being made and know what’s going to happen in it and it’s *so* good that I can’t praise this enough! Such intricate telling and pleasant style, not to mention that I just adore Aleena because she’s such a good character!  

[fedine]

Answer all of them

Under a cut! This is a long one!!

1: Do they drink coffee?

I don’t think so; though I do think he enjoys the occasional Starbucks drink.

2: Are they left or right handed?

Right handed!

3: How do they do their hair? Facial hair? (If they have it)

His hair is super long! I’ve seen some pictures of him where he has it tied back, but not too many more recently. It looks messy but it is really really cute! I want to brush it or just run my fingers through it a lot. He also does grow some of his facial hair out! I like it a lot.

4: What’s their favorite animal?

Well, going off his fursona, I’m going to go with a wolf.

5: What is their relationship status?

Taken by me!

6: What is their favorite band/singer?

A weird thing about our relationship is that we don’t really talk about or share music too much, but we know we have similar music tastes! I also know he likes Death Grips.

7: Are they more a cat or dog person?

Dog person!

8: What does their laugh sound like?

Ohh, gosh! I love his laugh so much! He also has several of them, ranging from: “This is a horrible picture and I’m showing it to you now,” “This is a horrible picture and I’m NOT going to show it to you,” and my personal favorite is his really really loud laugh he does when some meme he sees gets really weird/bad or we keep adding onto it ourselves.

9: Do they know multiple languages? Which ones?

He used to take French, so he knows a little bit, but he isn’t fluent. 

10: How old are they? How old are you?

He is just a year younger than me. 13 months, to be exact!

11: One word that describes them.

I can’t possibly choose one word, but honestly my favorite one to describe him as is “warm” because I see it in his eyes in pictures he sends and when we video chat. He makes me feel like I’m at home with him, even if we’re so far apart.

12: Do they have any pets?

A German shepherd mix named Winston! I hear him a lot in the background of our calls.

13: What is their favorite TV show?

He really liked Bojack Horseman! He binged it around the time we got together. We also like watching shows together that we never finish… Though, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood was one we did finish, and we both loved it! He also really likes Dragonball Z, and Bleach!

14: What is their favorite movie?

Oh, that’s a hard one because he REALLY likes movies and film theory and stuff, but I’m pretty sure it’s a Marvel movie. He also told me one time that he likes Studio Ghibli movies a lot, but he talks about Marvel movies a lot more.

15: What car do they drive?

He does not drive.

16: What ethnicity and/or nationality are they? 

He’s Australian! 

17: Where did you meet them?

I met him online, after he joined my guild in World of Warcraft. I had been a member for a year already, and I believe I had just gotten back from an extended break from Horde side. He was very new to the game, and also very shy at first, but he joined up with us because he wanted to try role play, as well as raiding. He was at a large, server-wide event that I went to as well, but it took him a while to get into the Discord voice chat. He’s very shy! Once he got in though, we hit it off really well! Soon we had begun to spend nearly every waking moment together. Also, we haven’t stopped doing that. It’s been about a year since we started that. 

18: What was your first meeting like?

Would you believe me if I said it was almost an argument? I’d been healing a long time, and he loved to tank, so we each thought our own roles were the most important in a raid/dungeon environment. “A tank keeps the mobs off the healer, so they aren’t overwhelmed;” “A tank won’t last long without a healer.” Well, now we know that both of the roles are much weaker on their own, and they are only really at their peak when they have the other with them. Still, that has not stopped him from saving the raid in huge manners as he’s the last tank alive and the boss is at 1% HP. Of course, I’ve saved the raid too, just in much more subtle manners!

19:  What is their zodiac sign? Are your signs compatible?

I’m a Virgo and he’s a Libra. So, yes, I do believe that they are!

20: What month is their birthday?

October! That was already my favorite month of the year before I even met him!

21: What is your favorite outfit on them?

Whatever he’s most comfortable in! 

22: Are they good texters?

He’s very good! He’s a quick typer, and messages me “Good morning!” if I don’t get to it first every day! He types with the correct capitalization, too, which I find very cute for some reason, but that may be just because it’s him.

23: Your favorite feature about their appearance.

Oh, hmmm… I love the way he looks, and it’s hard to choose just one thing. His eyes, maybe? I did already go over that, as well as his hair… You know what, I’m going to keep talking about his eyes. They’re two beautiful shades of blue, and every time he sends me a picture of him I can see how much he loves me in them, and sometimes I have to make an effort to not be overwhelmed by it. In a good way!

24: Your favorite thing about their personality.

He’s a big sweetheart, and a huge goofball! He knows how to make me laugh and feel better whenever I’m not in a good mood.

25: Do they make you laugh?

Every single day! 

26: Do you make them laugh?

Yes, I do! We have very similar senses of humor. Sometimes it’s awful. I love it all the time, though!

27: Are they good huggers/ kissers?

Even though we’re long distance, yes. He is, and I know he is. 

28: What is your favorite “flaw” that they have?

He’s a degenerate. It’s really funny though. I love how chaotic he is.

29: Are they nice to strangers?

He is VERY shy, but yes, he is! He’s extremely sweet and kind.

30: What is the funniest thing they have ever said?

Honestly, he’s just the funniest person ever and makes me crack up every single day. Sometimes he just randomly says whatever comes to his mind. Today I really liked his joke about that redesign for the new Incredibles movie. Something about weed. We’ve been making a lot of weed jokes today.

31: Saddest?

Also from today: he didn’t know what a buffalo was. He thought they were different from bison. I was eating buffalo jerky from 5 years ago and he thought it was a brand of jerky. He also thought they were extinct.

32: Weirdest?

Literally any vore joke he has ever made. 

33: Cutest?

Gosh, just trying to pick one thing is so difficult... But when he tells me he loves me and how he can’t wait to see me? When he tells me about dreams he has with me in them? It makes my heart melt.

34: Ever dreamt about them? What happened in the dream?

Recently I posted about a dream I had about him and I just kissing each other. Nothing super exciting sounding, but gosh, I want to experience it so bad.

35: How tall are they? How tall are you?

I am... 5′4″... He is... 6′5″... 

36: Do they have a booty?

I do not know. He has only sent me selfies of just his face or completely front facing. I can only assume. Doesn’t matter though! 

37: What are their hobbies?

Video games. He really likes World of Warcraft (of course!), Fallout: New Vegas, Grand Theft Auto V, Elder Scrolls Online, Overwatch, Quake Champions, and Pokemon!

38: What are their talents?

He’s has amazing reflexes, honestly. He uses them for gaming, and because of it, he’s amazingly good at just about any game he plays. 

39: What would your dream date be with them?

A physical one, where we are next to each other.

40: Does anyone know about your crush/love?

I make it a point to make sure everyone knows.

41: What do you guys have in common?

Pretty much everything, really. From sense of humor, taste in music, and favorite video games for the most part. We also share the same sexual orientation, and we have yet to disagree on politics.

42: Do they go to the gym?

No, but he exercises just about every day! If he doesn’t do a whole bunch of jumping jacks his legs start to get sore.

43: Do they go by their given name?

Yes and no. Since we’re in a World of Warcraft guild, we both go by screen names, so no one there calls him his real name but me. Same thing with just about everything online, though. Other than that though, he does.

44: What is their favorite color?

He really loves orange! Orange and white is one of his favorite color schemes. It makes me think of orange creamsicles!

45: How far apart do you live from them?

About 572 miles-- roughly an eight and a half hour drive. 

46: What song reminds you of them?

Boats and Birds by Gregory and the Hawk

47: Do they listen to a lot of music?

I think so, but I think he listens to more random YouTube videos than anything.

48: What do they smell like?

He gave me his jacket for Valentine’s Day, and when I first got it I just held it up to my face and smelled it for a good while because it was the first time I got to experience what he smelled like. I can’t really describe his scent, because I’m not good with words in that way, but I just know that it’s my favorite scent in the whole world.

49: If they were in a book (protagonist or antagonist or supporting character, up to you) how would the writer describe them?

If it were up to me, I would describe him as accurately as possible. Still, I only really know his personality the best, so that’s what I would describe the most. I think he would be a protagonist, as well. He’s my protagonist, anyway.

50: How often do you see them?

We talk every day-- I’m talking to him right now! But as for actually seeing him, I look at every picture he has sent me of himself every night. There’s about... 22 of them that I have, including a video, but there’s one I missed of him in Australia in a “had to do it to em” pose. I’m still sad I lost that one. 

51: The last text/ message they sent you?

It was a Sorlag skin from Quake Champions. As for a text message from Discord, it was a “Call me!”

52: The last thing they said to you in person?

:(

53: What is the most embarrassing thing that’s happened to you in front of them?

I once said “Heal, boy!” to him while we were leveling in WoW together because his health was low and he wasn’t paying attention, but it came off as “Heel, boy!” like he was a dog... The more embarrassing bit though about it was that one or two of our friends were there as well.

54: Do they have any tattoos or piercings?

To my knowledge, no, but I seriously doubt it.

55: What color are their eyes?

Blue gray! 

56: What is their clothing style?

Comfortable: jeans and graphic T-shirts! That I plan to steal...

57: What is one thing that makes them really special?

Literally everything about him. He’s the most special person to me, and I love him for every single thing. 

58: Will you tell your crush your feelings?

Alright, gonna be honest, I'm a bi wlw, and I was content to never say a damn thing about any feeling I ever felt, so I’m thankful every day that he did, because I was very ready to take my feelings to the grave and pine after him forever.

59: How long did you know them before you started falling for them?

Probably like a day or something. It didn’t take long to start liking him-- even when we were alone in the server voice chats that day I felt comfortable around him.

60: Was there a defining moment when you knew you liked them?

Sort of! I don’t remember the exact details, but I do remember messaging one of my best friends about it immediately. I was pretty vague about it to her. Something like: “Yeah, I think I’m in love with someone in the voice chat...” And she knew immediately who. I guess I was obvious, though.

[astrologyandnicotine-blog]

The signs as letters to my exes/love interests

Check Sun, Moon & Venus

ARIES: 

You were so confident, energetic, happy and honest. You told it how it was and you never ever let anyone disregard your opinion. You were never afraid to push people away or shut them out when you thought it bettered you. I still remember your optimistic outlook on life, problems never seemed to drag on with you. You saw life as it was, simple and beautiful and never let anything get you down. However, your moods flickered like a switch. I couldn’t stay on top of them, your aggression and short fuse was ultimately the end of our 3-week-romance. But, when I think of you, I think of how strong you were. I still remember your parent’s divorce and how you hated them fighting yet you never complained, always fighting issues with a mere ‘I’ll get over it’ or ‘It’ll pass’. I think that’s what kept you so strong in the end.

TAURUS:

 You were the first person to break my heart with your stubborn, uncompromising ways. You didn’t realise it then, but that’s ultimately what had ruined our relationship. You wanted to do everything for everybody, but when it came down to me you didn’t give a sh*t. I hated you for months after our breakup, I hated what you had done to me. Only recently did I realise you didn’t mean to hurt me, you didn’t mean to be malicious, you’re too kind. I realised that I was unfair, that I wasn’t exactly easy to be with. On the outside, you came off as materialistic and selfish, but your heart was far too big to realise what you were doing was wrong. I don’t blame you for breaking up with me, you had your reasons. However, I do miss that goofy smile or the way your brown hair effortlessly flowed with youth and shine. You have everyone under your spell, we all adore you, it’s time for you to realise that. It’s a shame we don’t talk anymore, I wish things would’ve ended up differently instead of arguments and glares. I wish you the best.

GEMINI: 

You were probably the funniest, most down to earth, chill person I’ve ever met. I remember late night conversations with you over stupid shit like how Donald Trump might actually be a hot-cheeto and how one day we were going to conquer the world together. I wish things would’ve worked out for us, you were always so much fun to be around. People were drawn to you, they loved talking to you as much as you loved talking to them. Everything was fun and new to you, I loved that. I still remember your silly inventions like peanut butter on Spaghetti or Icing on pickles. You wanted to try and invent everything and loved to show off your inventions with your witty tactics and interesting facts. I wish things would’ve worked out in the end for us, but things began to become a game. I just hope whoever you’re laying next to right now can give you bigger, brighter dreams than I could. I’m sorry.

CANCER: *my sun sign*

We met and it was like suddenly our worlds combined. We were exactly the same, I couldn’t tell if it was because of our sun sign or not but we understood each other in ways I can’t explain. I met you during one of the hardest stages of my life, I was heartbroken and down and you did everything in your power to make me feel better. You’re so calm, caring, kind and loyal.I loved that about you. We didn’t last long, I don’t think anyone expected us to, either way, babe. It was fun while it lasted, but us together would’ve caused chaotic storms. I’ll never forget your late-night messages and how you overused the term “SMILE FOR ME!”. You always wanted people to feel better and would risk becoming sleep deprived just to hear my wild tales of heartbreak, madness and issues. You had a way of thinking through problems and coming up with logical answers but you were never afraid of suggesting to “SET HIM ON FIRE!!!” However, I wanted free from your grasp. You knew me too well and you became too obsessive and I started to feel trapped. I really wish I could’ve made it work, I really wish I could’ve been the one who kept your heart but it wasn’t mine in the first place. I’m sorry.

LEO:

You were the first person that I fell completely, utterly, chaotically in love with. Right from the start, you had captured my heart and I knew there wasn’t any way I was getting away from you without being broken. You were so charismatic, loveable and educated, it alarmed me. You had so many skills and you could play the guitar so well I honestly had fantasies of you serenading me. Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE loved you. You had a way of drawing in crowds as if it was nothing, my introverted self hated that. You were absolutely adorable too with your bold ways and interesting speech. People love you, they still do. You make everyone feel so comforted and attractive, I envy that. Our relationship was rocky but it had been the best two months of my life, you sparked something so deep inside of me that I never expected it to burn out, but it did. You see, Leo, you were far too egotistical, social and prideful that it ruined our relationship. Instead of staying home to talk, you’d rather go out and have fun. I needed more from you that you couldn’t provide and it ultimately lead to our breakup. I just couldn’t keep a leash on you. I’m still in love with you, god, I hope you know that. I hope you know that it’s going to take a long, long time for me to forget you. I think that’s what makes me come back for more each time. I really wish you’d love me back, but it’s okay, life doesn’t work out the way you planned for it too, ever.

VIRGO:

You were the first person I immediately clicked with. We had known each other for a maximum of ten minutes and I had felt like I had known you for thousands of years. Part of me still believes you were my soulmate in some sense like we were bound to get to know each other for the short-lived time we had together. You were extremely flirtatious and neat, it was almost humorous to watch. But you had such a sad view on life. You were extremely critical and if someone didn’t live up to your standards you almost became offended. I remember staying up late with you and how you’d go on for hours ranting about your silly mistakes, I hated it then but I miss it now. And although your outlook seemed dark, you DID radiate some degree of positive energy. You loved to help out in any way you could, I still remember those snapchats you sent me where you found a stray kitten on the side of the street, named him “Sausage” and decided to keep him. I loved that about you, how you weren’t afraid to show a more sensitive side to you. I wish we could’ve worked things out, I wish it didn’t end with us hating each other. I’m sorry, love, I really am.

LIBRA:

I have no words other than you were insane and if I never see you again I will be JOYFUL.

SCORPIO:

You were so dark and manipulative- I loved it. I simply adored how you were so blunt and honest about everything, it was refreshing considering I was always afraid of offending people. However, you did seem to think you were better than everyone nonchalantly. Yet we talked for hours about almost anything, I still remember how caught up you were over that blonde girl who broke your heart. You told everyone you didn’t care but I saw through your ways. You were like a brother to me, we had fun with our playful flirting but when it came down to you catching feelings for me? I ran. I’m sorry I made you open up to me and I couldn’t stay for long..I really am. I wish I could’ve figured things out and I wasn’t so naive but, that’s just me. We haven’t spoken for four months now, I hope you’re okay.

SAGITTARIUS:

You were so reckless, care-free and fun. I loved being around you and still do. I had a small crush on you like the way a child would, but could you blame me? You were always out there with your ideas and your crooked smile, I adore it. You loved anything and everything to do with memes, drake and “bitches” (as you called it.) You were a year older than me and I’ll never forget the random words of “wisdom” you taught me. We still talk, it’s funny how a year from today I was watching you skateboard in the rain while I yelled at you to be careful and now we exchange casual ‘hellos’ while I ask you about your family and you shoot me blank dry stares. I wish things went back to how they used to be, but they can’t, and that’s okay. I don’t blame you.

CAPRICORN:

You’re so gentle in ways I can’t explain, It’s almost kind of sweet. On the outside, you pose as a stubborn person. You pretend that nothing bothers you and that you have a mentality that “I WON’T FORGIVE AND I WON’T FORGET!!!” but really if people genuinely get to know you, you’re pretty easy to figure out. When we first met I felt attraction flicker inside of me, only for it to be burnt out by your proclaims of love for someone else. I don’t blame you, you’re doing the best you can. I wish we could talk more, but I’m afraid I’m growing bored. I’m sorry..holy fuck, am I ever sorry.

AQUARIUS: 

I don’t love you in a romantic way, but rather in a platonic way. You were the first person I met who could truly tell me how it is. I love how original, independent and clean you are. Everything you do makes me smile and you put me in a genuine better mood. I never fail to have fun with you and even when I feel like things are crumbling down you’re here with your sweet ways! You love to listen and I think that’s my favourite quality about you considering all I do is complain and whine like the true child I am. Thanks for not running away even when it got rough, thank you.

PISCES:

You were so wise and gentle, I loved it. You never did things out of spite and loved to see things from the other person point of view. Issues were never forever in your eyes and you loved to work them out. I envied that, I was always the whiner who was sure that my problems would bury me deep and you always found a way to dig me back out again. I thank you for that, honestly. You taught me that not everyone is trying to destroy you and that sometimes, the world is beautiful. I love you and always will, thank you.

[fulloflesbeans]

Hazel Eyes & Cake Pops [Ch. 12]

Read on Ao3 here

"That's it?" Rachel asked as she felt the back of my head.

We were sitting on the couch, her legs were crisscrossed and mine with up to my chest, hugging them close to me. Chloe was still in the bathroom doing her hair.

"That's all she told me," I repeated for the third time, "I didn't want to probe her about it."

"You're so nice," Rachel smirked, "Ask to hang out with tomorrow then. You guys didn't stay there long."

"Were you guys doing something?"

"We went out to eat, girls were looking at Chloe and I nearly had to knock a bitch out, and then we just walked around. We didn't feel like doing anything crazy so we went around some shops and looked through windows. This was so funny, Chloe said "nice Rachel we're having." I remember her saying that when we skipped school together for the first time."

Rachel loved talking about that. It was one of the first things she told me when we first met. I still remember Chloe's face of terror when she was reminded of that. Good thing she couldn't hear over the clipper's buzz in the bathroom.

"Are you going to stay up again tonight?" She asked.

"Yeah, but I have a feeling she won't do that this time." I said with smile. She seemed to be in a good mood after hanging out, too bad she had to go.

Chloe came out of the bathroom, back in her half-shaven glory, and posed for us in the middle of the living room, "Am I hot or am I fucking hot?"

Rachel released a wolf whistle, "Very fucking hot, Chloe. Which reminds me, you never wore the things I bought you!"

"Sorry, got a little distracted by you looking like a snack." Chloe shrugged. She had such a confident smirk on her face, Rachel could only huff out her annoyance. I was a little uncomfortable in room by the sudden tension that statement created. I sat there, looking back and forth between them to see if something was going to happen.

"Anyway," Rachel looked back at me again, "Text her right now."

Chloe just smirked and then left to the bathroom again.

"Huh? Why right now?"

"It's been an hour since we came back, so just check if she's good now."

I reached into my pocket for my phone, welcomed by many notifications I get from Tumblr, and went into my messages. Chloe's messages were at the very top and Kate's were right below her. I pressed it and put in my first thought, What's the film about?

I tossed my phone off to the side, redirecting my attention to Rachel, who was focused on her own phone until she heard my phone thump against the couch.

Rachel put her phone back on her lap, "What did you say?"

"Kate had to leave to this film thing her friends were making, so I just asked what it's about."

She an amused look on her face, "It's a little too late to ask that, right?"

I was ready to reply, but all that left was, "I-It's-Well..."

I stammered way too much, causing Rachel to snort, "It's okay, you're getting better."

I slapped myself on the forehead. I still had a lot to learn. My phone vibrated; if it's Kate, I will lose my shit. I grabbed it and checked. It's a short film about two girls meeting in a library. It's a cute little love story.

That sounded nice. I would watch that on a loop. What did they need you for?

"Hey, we should go somewhere later." Chloe came back into the room, sitting on the armrest of our couch.

"You want to party on a Wednesday again?" I asked her.

"Nah, we should do another movie thing. Go to an actual theater and then go out to eat altogether."

"I don't want to third wheel you guys," I checked my phone again, "You two just go and be together."

"It's okay, you can say "I rather talk to Kate.'" Rachel lightly pushed me.

They needed some help setting up in the library. And to make the story more natural.

I raised an eyebrow. Did you write it?

Shit, that was a stupid question. If she wrote it, she would have said it already.

"Do you wanna go right now?" Chloe asked Rachel, holding her hand out. Rachel took it, standing up and grabbing Chloe into an embrace.

"I would love to." Rachel let go and then looked at me again, "You'll be good, right?"

She pressed her finger on my chin and then lifted my head.

"I'll be fine. You guys enjoy your date."

Rachel seemed satisfied with that and put her hand down. I smiled and waved them goodbye.

"See you later, cliMax." Chloe said before closing and locking the front door.

I lied down on the couch and turned the TV on. I surfed the channels for a bit until I landed on How I Met Your Mother. I spent two minutes on the episode before I felt my phone again. I gave the idea!

Nice! Hey, do you have time to call right now? Friends left me.

I threw my phone behind me again. Taking out my ponytail, I was able to lie down on my back with my head against the armrest. I was starting to feel the couch starting to sink and become more cramped, feeling the metal under. I felt my phone again, but there were longer vibrations.

I answered it, "Hey Kate."

"Hey," Kate sounded upbeat still, "I just had to see my friends for five minutes. I wish I knew. You could have waited."

"Oh, that's too bad." I sat up, crossing my legs.

"I know! Anyway, I have three hours left before class, so I'm stuck sitting on the curb again."

"Dang, Chloe and Rachel left already. I have unlimited minutes though."

"Me too." Kate then grunted a bit. I think she sat down.

"So, how did you get the idea?"

"Um, my friends have been wanting to make a film for a festival but they had no idea. I just mentioned it to them about two girls who meet in a library and then we see them get along."

"Did that come from anywhere? Like, something inspire you?"

I actually felt myself become giddy and hopping in my seat.

Kate was quiet on the other side. I didn't even hear breathing; it was dead silent as I lowered my TV volume.

"Nowhere in particular." She finally replied. She didn't sound confident to say that. I felt a little neutral again after that response.

"Alright, do you always give them ideas?"

"I give about ninety-percent of their project ideas."

"It must be exciting to be friends with a bunch of film majors, huh?"

"Yes, they always talk about different things they could record and how to make shots better. Do you hang out with anyone else?"

Ouch, they were the only ones I talked to, unless someone spoke to me first, like Evan.

"Ah, no, I'm spending more time eating and sleeping than actually socializing." I nervously chuckled, because that sounded really sad. I’d have to thank Rachel soon for finally getting food into my system again.

"We need to hang out more then. Staying inside isn't healthy."

Yes. That was all I wanted to say.

"That would be nice. Chloe and Rachel would agree."

"We can try again tomorrow. I'll tell my friends to not bother me."

"You have class tomorrow too?"

"No, I'm completely free."

"Then we can go somewhere! Somewhere that's not school, anyway."

"Is there a place you like going to?"

"Lately, just clothing stores and restaurants. What about you?"

"Not places you would find enjoyable."

"Try me." I pressed back into the couch as I looked up at the ceiling.

"I'm serious, Max. It is nothing you would want to do."

I could push on. I wanted to know more about her than just word of mouth, about things she likes to see and places she liked to go and people she called her friends. However, I decided on finding a middle ground for the both of us. I sat there for a couple minutes, neither of us were saying anything.

"Any ideas?" I stood up and started to pace in the room.

"I'm thinking we can go to Starbucks. If you need help with anything for school, we can do them over there. I think Chloe was there when I went?"

"That sounds great! And yeah, she works there so we could stay a while."

"Sounds like a plan to me. Afternoon?"

"Yup, that's perfect." We ended that subject with chuckles. On Kate's end, I could vaguely hear a pencil scratching against paper.

"Are you drawing again?" I asked, sitting on the couch again, leaning over and resting my elbows on my legs.

"Of course, any requests?"

For the remaining hours, I was naming different ridiculous objects and combinations. I was naming different memes, which Kate somehow didn't know a majority of them, and even try to draw me or anyone she knows from memory. Throughout the call, Kate expressed her frustrations about every meme she had to look up and having to remember people's faces.

"I already made you a portrait," She reminded, "Why would I draw you again?"

"Because muscle memory, it'll help you make consistent circles." I smirked at myself.

"Good point, but you're going last."

I jokingly sighed, "Fine."

I checked the time and it was about ten minutes before her class starts. I pouted and, speaking of memes, that Kermit thing came to mind, "don't tell her that class is starting soon."

"Hey, you should be getting ready to go to class." I lied down on my side, towards the TV. It was still playing the same show.

"Oh! Thank you, I forgot!" Kate sounded startled at herself. I could hear her frantically closing her book and doing a little squeak from what sounds like standing up.

"What class is it anyway?"

"Perspective drawing," she replied quickly, "I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Absolutely, have fun in class."

I could hear a faint thank you and then she hung up first. I threw my phone behind me again, and instantly, I started to giggle uncontrollably. I hid my face in my hands, kicking my feet, and feeling my face become very hot as my giggling kept going. This feeling was overwhelming and my stomach felt like it was full of butterflies.

I felt my phone vibrate again and it gave me a heart attack, thinking it was Kate, but it was only Rachel.

"Hello?" I said through very small giggles.

"Max? What are you doing?" She sounded very worried.

"I just finished talking to Kate, sorry!" I took deep breaths.

She sighed into the phone, but chuckled at the end, "You're so gay. Anyway, we're heading back right now. Chloe saw people checking me out and now she's hella angry."

"In a "she's famous" kind of way or "she's hot" kind of way?"

"It was a big clusterfuck of both."

"Damn, tell me when you get back?"

"For sure, see you later."

I hung up and went back into my giggly fit.

It took fifteen minutes for them to come back, by then I got all my laughter out of my system. When the door opened, it was pushed so hard it ricocheted and tried to close again. Chloe pushed the door open again, straight faced yet obviously fuming, and then sat next to me with a thud. Rachel came in, only smiling, and then closed the door lightly. This will be interesting.

"Don't fucking mind me, it's not like I was trying to spend quality fucking time with my girlfriend." Chloe growled. Was she… talking to me? She wasn’t looking at me or Rachel.

"Chloe, it's okay," Rachel pulled Chloe into a hug, holding her head against her chest, "You don't have to worry so much."

There I was again, being a third wheel to this moment.

Rachel then kissed the top of Chloe's head.

"What happened?" I scooted away from them.

"It's a long story," Rachel let her go, "I won't say it right now, but I'll tell you eventually. Instead, I would love to hear about your phone call."

I sighed happily, "Gee, where do I begin? It lasted three hours, we talked about her story idea, her friends, I gave her suggestions on things to draw, and then we planned out going to Starbucks tomorrow."

Rachel gasped, "Yes! This is a date, right?"

"No, it's just a study thing." I shook my head.

"I'm going with you guys tomorrow, when is it?" She slapped my thigh hard as she said this.

"It's in the afternoon."

"We need to sleep. You need to get some rest and then we'll plan out your outfit." Rachel grabbed my shoulders and then shook me back and forth. I felt myself become dizzy, but I was feeling the enthusiasm. It was only seven, but I do need sleep.

"Chloe," Rachel stood up and grabbed Chloe's arm, pulling her off the couch, "You need to relax."

Chloe was just letting Rachel pull her around, like a rag doll.

"Come on, nice massage, watch your favorite shows, cuddling." Rachel named off. A few years ago, those would have been completely different suggestions. I watched as they went back into the room, but this time the door didn't shut loudly like every other time.

I grabbed my bag and took out my laptop. For the past couple of weeks, I haven't even used it for anything. I had no reason to even use it at all. Laptops, to me, gave me the same feeling of happiness as taking pictures did. It was still asleep and I was met with the blue Tumblr dashboard. As I actively ignored my assignment deadlines, I went through the dashboard reblogging and listening to maybeshewill at the same time.

Eventually, it was about eleven when I stopped and felt my stomach growl. Plugging in my laptop charger, I finally stood up from my spot and went to check on them. I saw that they were in a spooning position, Rachel against Chloe's back, and knew I should leave them alone. I slowly closed the door, smiling to myself and went back to the couch, waiting for my phone to go off.

t;lin�, �C

[crazy-grrrl-on-the-computer]

8 and 18 for the artist ask meme!

Thank you!!!! I half wasn’t expecting to get any Asks forthis, but I am pleasantly surprised!

I’m gonna go ahead and plop question 8 below the cut becauseit… got long… because I decided to cheat. >.

Feelfree to ask me more about my art~

18. What is yourpurpose for drawing?

Even when I was a kid, I have always drawn to illustrate theideas I had in my head either to go with a story I was writing or to tell astory in pictures. (Can you believe that once upon a time I also used to drawcomics? I still have them somewhere. ;;v;;) A few years ago, I made it my goalto draw every OC I ever created because I wanted to have the visuals to go withtheir stories. But since there are 300 and counting and I have so little energynow, the process became an endless cycle and I will forever be unable to catchup with my overactive imagination.

So, I guess what you can pluck out of that is that I draw asa creative outlet and to make myself happy. But I do hope that what I draw isable to make other people happy, too! So, if I can accomplish that, it makes mefeel even better that I can share this little joy with someone else~ nvn

Especially since lately I’ve mostly been drawing fanart ofrare ships. My art is usually highly self-indulgent is what I’m trying to say,but it brings me joy when I discover that there are other people who also sharemy interests and look forward to seeing my content.

8. What is yourfavourite piece that you have done?

Well, this is an unfair question because I have too manyfavorites to just pick one. But… I guess I’ll go through the stuff I’ve postedonline and link a few of them here instead of reposting them (because I am notin the mood to go through all of the art pieces I HAVEN’T posted just tophotograph and upload them… yet, anyway… but I may later if prompted). ^^

AKing Always Makes His Pretty Fool Dance is an old favorite because I drewit for a friend based on an idea from a roleplay we were doing with our OCs. Ihave such a great love for Magister and Smith because they have a really funand intimate dynamic that is great to portray~ I had an interesting time withthat piece particularly because there’s something so playful there about howthey’re sizing each other up and playing this game just to get closer. Theirentire story basically started with Magister challenging Smith to solve herriddles and it evolved into an intricate mind game that Smith quickly foundhimself addicted to (hence the title of the still unposted story being AnAccidental Addiction).

FriendOr Foe is another sketch illustrating a scene where two of my mer OCs meetfor the first time. Aleksander and Zane are so precious because it’s like thehappy socialite sunshine baby meets the always-on-edge-fight-to-survive lonertype and they find something they didn’t realize they were looking for in eachother. It’s very sweet but also angsty and that sketch gives me so many feelsbecause I love them. ;;v;;

I don’t really have as particular of a reason for likingthese next two aside from how much work I put into their character sheets. Daceyis such a cutiepie and despite the fact that there was a struggle to get hisdragon half to look good, I’m actually more proud of how soft his torso looksand how good the markings on his face turned out. The sheet for Brizalatook me so long to complete and the coloring!!! The reason I don’t color muchanymore is that it takes too much energy, but it looks really good here~ And Ialso just really like all the poses and how they illustrate different parts ofxyr story. >v

But anyway, enough of my OCs (even though I could and wouldgo on about them for ages if prompted) because the only thing I’m known forhere on Tumblr is fanart and I’m sure that’s what most people are expecting. XDI could say every single piece of Boueibu fanart in myart tag is my favorite, but… I’ll just pluck out a few.

Vanilla-ScentedAngel is definitely a personal favorite because of how nice the colors lookand I love the expressions on their faces~ They just look so happy and in love,and it’s very sweet and just how I wanted them to be. ^^ Arima’s smile, though…is the best part along with the rose, in my opinion.

The Kurotori/Munakata sketch I drew for TomorrowStarts Today is one of the most unexpectedly beautiful things I think I’vepersonally done (even though I was too lazy to finish drawing Kurotori’s hands//bricked) because they just look so good together. Similarly, I could say thesame for the Ichiban/Ryuusketches I drew for that series rewrite AU I’ve been planning. Iespecially love how the first one cameout because Ichiban ended up way more handsome than I had originally intended(though I’m not complaining) and the body language is just… so perfect for thedynamics I had in my head. And then I just wanted to mention my Kurotori/Gourasketches for The Darkest Night again because I will forever have too manyfeelings about them and something about those first two sketches makes mereally happy. I think it’s mostly their facial expressions and also how softthey look in the second picture that I really like.

And I’ll force myself to stop here because I pretty muchcheated on this question and didn’t particularly add any insight to thosesketches by talking about them either. //shot

[mistake-messenger-trash-blog]

How would the RFA + V + Saeran pamper themselves? I've got the most lovely image of Zen getting a manicure, and 707 would definitely be the 'feel my legs i just shaved and they're soo smooth' person.

 Before anyoneasks.. yes, I did look up what the parody name of each company was in MysticMessenger (Noogle, NouTube, Moonbucks…), and I’m planning to use them since it’stechnically ~their~ world.

 Also, this came out waaaaaay longer than I intended it to, so the rest will be under the cut.

 Feel free to send in asks and requests!

~~~~~

Yoosung

   ● Yoosung is a broke college student, so anythingthat involves him buying himself some nice things is out of the question.

   ● But… he wants to try something different.

  ● From the Christmas DLC, it’s canon that Yoosung enjoysusing face-masks, as he had tried them on after being given them by Zen.

  ● So he asks Zen to give him some recommendations fordifferent cheap face-masks that would relax him.

  ● After buying them, he’ll go home and put anything thatwould stress him out of his sight.

  ● College textbooks? In the closet. Class notes? Wedgedbetween some books in a bookcase.

   ● Dick: out (I’msorry this is an old meme but I couldn’t help myself)

   ● He even hides his phone to make sure Seven won’t tryto call him in the middle of his me-time.

  ● I can just imagine Yoosung with his usual two bobbypins on one side of his hair and then two more on the right side to keep hishair from ruining the face-mask.

  ● After taking the mask off he’ll just stroke his facefor like an hour because of how smooth it is

   ● He’ll also try to pamper himself in smaller ways.

  ● For example, after studying hard for exams/finalshe’ll allow himself to have a day where he sleeps in, has his favorite foodsfor each meal, stays in his pajamas all day, watches movies…

  ● He’s the type of person to go on a Noogle deep-dive andend up findings some sort of NouTube video explaining the basics of yoga.

   ● He’ll attempt to do a few poses, but he has thebalance of a newborn giraffe and the flexibility of a stick, so he just ends uptumbling down to the floor.

 Jaehee

  ● When Jumin decides to finally give Jaehee somedays off, she promises to herself that she will make the most out of them.

  ● I imagine that Jaehee will go back to training Judofor a little bit, to keep the knowledge inside her head and her body fit.

  ● She’ll also go to some sort of tea store, where shebuys some fancy natural teas that will help her relax.

  ● Every day when she comes back from Judo, she’ll take arelaxing bath and then brew a new tea and accompany it with a plate ofbiscuits, before settling in to the sofa with some comfy clothes for the restof the night.

  ● She binge-watches almost all of the musicals that Zenhas been in, along with some of his singing performances that were put up on NouTube.   

   ●  Baeheeis probably the one to get pampered the most.

   ● By this, I mean that as soon as Zen hears that TheTrust Fund Kid™ has let Jaehee some days off, he immediately books a spaappointment for her.

 ● She gets massages, manicures, pedicures, facials…literally everything.

 ● Like she said during the Christmas DLC, she earns alot of money but she never has the time to properly spend it.

 ● So, she’ll go out to the shops and buy herself somenew clothes, shoes, accessories, and even some books that caught her eye.

 ● While she still has time, she plans out some ways inwhich she could take breaks and relax during her workdays.

 ● She’ll make a promise to herself to go out and buysome scented candles, so that when she has to come home to work, she can lightsome up and relax.

 ● In addition to doing all of that, she will go and lookup some recipes that are easy to make, so she can quickly make them for herselfwhen she’s working. 

 ● By the end of her well-deserved break, Jaehee feelslike an entirely new woman.

 Zen

  ● When itcomes to pampering himself, he likes to do it one day at a time and in themiddle of doing something stressful.

  ● It’slike deciding to take everything easy on a Wednesday and then continue workingthe next day.

  ● Likethe anon said, he will 100% go out to get himself a manicure.

  ● He’llprepare some comfy clothes for the day and he’ll put his hair up in a bun. (whata babe)

  ● He’llwalk in to the spa sipping on some sort of natural tea from Moonbucks,sunglasses on and his usual radiant smile.

  ● Eventhe straightest of guys are swooning over him like what??

  ● Whilehe’s getting the manicure and pedicure, he’ll still be sipping on his freakingtea, looking like some sort of Hollywood superstar.

  ● When he’sdone there, he’ll return home and just use like three facemasks and any andevery skincare product imaginable.

  ● At somepoint during the day, Zen will be angrily typing away at his phone with afacemask on while venting about Jumin Han.

  ● Consideringwhat his career is, he decides to rest his voice for that entire day.

  ● He’llonly speak when truly necessary (like when he went to the spa or ordered hisdrink).

  ● Sincehe’s also the mom-type of guy, he’ll look up some drinks/foods that help histhroat so that he can be fully rested.

  ● Duringthat day, he’ll force himself not to have any beer and not to smoke. Albeit henever does it incredibly frequently, today is one of the many days in which hecompletely restrains himself from doing so.

  ● He’llalso watch his own musicals at the end of the day…. It’s Zen that we’re talkingabout, what were you expecting?

 Jumin

  ● Eventhough Jumin has a lot of money, he’s never been the type of person to buy manythings for himself.

  ● He’svery humble when it comes to spending money on personal things.

  ● Though,when his father tells him that he should take a day off since he has beenworking nonstop and suggests that he does some things for himself for once, heagrees.

  ● Becauseof this, he decides to take Elizabeth the 3rd out on her little cagewith wheels so that he can walk her around the stores.

  ● He, of course,chooses to spend more money on Elizabeth the 3rd than on himself.

  ● Hepulls the little cage around with him into pet stores, where he throws treatsupon treats into a cart, as we all many gifts and toys for his dear Elizabeth.

  ● It’squite the sight, really. A six-foot tall man clad in a complete suit, pulling acage with a cat in it behind him, throwing any cat product that seems remotelyinteresting to him into a shopping cart, and a couple of bodyguards trailingbehind him.

  ● He gotmore than one questioning look, to say the least.

  ● When hearrives at his penthouse, he takes every product out of its packaging and letsElizabeth test them.

  ● Thepoor cat has to have her food bowl taken away from her because of how manytreats she ate.

  ● At theend of the night, he’ll simply have a nice meal and he’ll change into somethingmore comfortable.

  ● He’lllounge around for a while before settling down on a small sofa before one ofthe many windows of his penthouse with a book in hand.

  ● He’llhave some classical music playing in the background, preferably some pianoaccompanied by a violin, while taking a sip of wine every now and then.

  ● Otherthan that, he prefers to pamper himself in very simple ways, considering howhis attitude towards himself is.

  ● A walkin the park here, some light exercising there, a couple of minutes of staringinto his aquarium…

 Seven

   ● Afterbeing forced by literally everyone to take a day or two off of work, he agreesto take things smoothly for a couple of days before taking a full day off.

  ● When heactually takes his day off, he decides to actually leave the bunker,considering how he barely ever goes outside, and needs to take vitamin Dsupplements every day to prevent him from having a vitamin D deficiency. (Ihave to take vitamin D3 every day because of the same reason, rip me)

  ● He’llhave his headphones over his ears, listening to his favorite music while takinga stroll around the city.

  ● Thepath that he took “coincidentally” led him to a cat café near lunchtime.

  ● He boughthimself a nice, big lunch since he usually only eats Honey Buddha Chips and PhDPepper for every meal.

  ● Sincehe actually doesn’t want to be kicked out of the café, he treats the catsnicely, and even uses the laser from his phone to get the cats on a wild chasearound his table.

  ● When hegets back home (Seven you were only out for like two hours??), he’ll bein the mood to wear a dress, but his legs are hairy af, so he’ll make it hismission to completely shave his legs.

  ● He’llthrow on so much lotion that everyone is surprised he didn’t die of some sortof chemical poisoning.

  ● But hislegs end up being soooooooo smooth???

  ● He justruns over to Saeran with his pants rolled up and he’ll just scream “TOUCH MYLEGS”

  ● Saeran knowsthat there’s no way that he’s getting out of this, so he’ll just sigh andstroke his brother’s leg once…

  ● ….butomfg they’re so soft??

  ● Saerancan’t bring himself to stop stroking his brother’s leg (as weird as it sounds).

  ● Seven’sjust standing there with the smuggest look to ever be seen.

 V

   ● Thissoft bby will make sure to relax as much as possible.

  ● His carwill be completely full of cameraequipment. He’s more prepared than anyone will ever be to take a photograph.

  ● Itstarts raining? He has a waterproof camera in his car. The scenery is too dark?He has a lens that allows a greater aperture for the photographs. Nothing seemsto be in focus? Your boy has a camera with some lenses and filters that giveyou a greater depth of field. (Wow the photography nerd in me just came outI apologize)

   ● V willhave everything that he’ll be doing completely planned out.

  ● Sincehe’s constantly travelling around the world to take photographs, he decides tostay within the boundaries of his city, in order to ‘catch up with his roots’.

  ● Hevisits many antique stores and shops,as well as local vendors and artisans.

  ● C a n d l e  s to r e s

 ● Thissweet man will spend hours choosing candles to buy. He ends up with morecandles than he’ll ever need in three lifetimes, but the smile on his facewhile picking them out is so bright no one can stop him.

  ● If he’sin the mood to talk, he’ll drop by Jumin’s penthouse and have a long chat thatlasts until the late night.

  ● If Juminproposes that he stays the night because of the time, he won’t refuse, and thenext day he’ll continue catching up with what’s been going on in either of themen’s lives.

  ● He’salso very likely to want to stay inside for a while, so he’ll give himself sometime off of taking photographs and he’ll just stay inside reading some books.

Saeran

  ● Saeran’sused to doing nothing for the entire day ever since he moved in with hisbrother, so his days are overall pretty chill stress-wise.

  ● Wheneverhe wants to give himself a little treat, he’ll go out on a peaceful walk,preferably where there’s little to no people.

  ● He’llgo into an ice cream shop, where he gets the biggest cone they have in hisfavorite flavor.

  ● I alsoenvision him going into a candy store, where he buys lots and lots of sweets tolast him for at least an entire year.

  ● I hcthat Saeran is actually really good at drawing, but just doesn’t like showinghis art to anyone.

  ● So, he’llgo out with a couple of pencils and a sketchbook to some sort of forest orpark, and he’ll sketch out his surroundings.

   ● If he’s feeling extra artistic, he’ll even stay for alittle while longer to fully color the sketches.

  ● He’llprobably look up some sort of animal shelter that allows visitors to play withthe animals, and he’ll end up playing with all the different little animals.

  ● Saeranabsolutely loves looking at the sky, so he’ll drive to some secluded placewhere he has a view of the entire city, and he’ll sit down with a blanket towatch the day turn into night.

  ● Thestars will be his company as he watches them appear across the sky, every oncein a while seeing a shooting star pass by.

  ● Thoughwhen he returns home, Saeyoung keeps insisting that he strokes his legs forsome reason??

[pluckyredhead]

Daredevil 101: Born Again, Part 2

Last time I covered the first three issues of Frank Miller and David Mazzucchelli’s “Born Again.” Now it’s time for the second half of the story, which...honestly is kind of a mess. Oh well!

When last we left our hero, he had suffered a complete mental and physical collapse after losing his home, savings, girlfriend, and legal license due to Fisk’s maneuverings. He would have died were it not for the timely intervention of a mysterious nun, who brought him back to her church and nursed him back to health.

Meanwhile, Karen, still fleeing Fisk’s assassins, hooks up with a guy traveling to New York and trades him sexual favors for transportation and coke. Matt’s AWOL, what with his house blowing up and all, but she gets in touch with Foggy:

FOGGY COULDN’T KEEP MATT SAFE BUT HE’S SURE AS HELL GONNA KEEP KAREN SAFE. <3 <3 <3

Meanwhile, Matt slowly recuperates under the nuns’ care:

Matt connects Maggie with the mysterious nun who visited him as a child and realizes that she’s his mother. Though there’s never a scene where she’s like “Okay I lied I’m your mom,” after this it’s basically just out in the open between them (though she doesn’t appear very frequently).

Also, Matt with a full beard is [fire emoji] [fire emoji] [fire emoji]

Matt has work to do, so he puts his filthy garbage-bed clothes back on and checks in on his supporting cast. Ben has killed his story revealing that Matt was framed out of fear, but he eventually decides he needs to publish it. However, as soon as he attempts to, Nurse Lois tries to kill Doris:

Yes, that’s Matt’s arm coming in to knock Lois out in the bottom panel - he’s been following Ben. He hides in another room while Ben gets Doris down and then realizes he’s been saved - and Ben’s savvy, so he knows right away by whom.

Meanwhile, some of Fisk’s heavies have been trying to get Melvin Potter to make a replica Daredevil suit as part of a convoluted plot to draw Matt out of hiding. Melvin’s not sure what to do, so he calls Ben:

Ben’s even more terrified to talk now, of course.

Matt visits Melvin and tells him to make the suit - he’ll make sure no one gets hurt. (Like 10 people wind up dying. Great job, Matt.)

And here’s where everything converges: Karen’s ex-“boyfriend” tracks her to Foggy’s apartment to get her back. Meanwhile, Fisk has broken a violently insane criminal (again, this story isn’t the greatest with mental illness) out of an asylum and furnished him with a Daredevil suit. The idea is for him to brutally murder Foggy and thus discredit Daredevil as well as Matt, while simultaneously taking away one of Matt’s few remaining connections.

One thing I appreciate about the way Mazzucchelli draws Karen in this - and it’s ridiculous that I have to note this, but it’s comics - is that she’s never sexualized. She’s a porn actress and sort of an unofficial prostitute, but she’s never drawn to look “sexy.” She looks ill and malnourished and terrified all the time, because she is. Too many artists would have taken this as an opportunity to put her in fishnets; Mazz draws her like she’s dying.

(That’s Wesley driving the car in the bottom panel, btw. I think he might die in this scene? Almost everyone dies.)

Anyway, Foggy calls the cops, but Karen, desperate to save him, hits him over the head with a lamp to knock him out and goes downstairs to meet Paulo. They’re attacked by Fisk’s hitmen, who have been told to kill anyone who emerges from the building. The cops who’ve arrived on the scene fire back, as does Paulo, and the fake Daredevil starts for Foggy’s apartment.

And then Matt, who’s been following Wesley and the fake Daredevil since they picked up the suit at Melvin’s, steps in:

Matt has a hell of a memory for smells, apparently.

Anyway, the hitmen and the cops and Paulo all take each other out, going down in a hail of bullets, and Matt and Karen race into each other’s arms:

What a gorgeous page! What a beautiful catharsis! It’s not at all marred by the fact that Matt should honestly be totally baffled by Karen’s sudden presence there. Seriously, it works so well emotionally even though it doesn’t quite work logically.

And, well...the story should end there, honestly, but we have two more issues to go, and here’s where it kind of falls apart. Matt’s relatively okay again, so is Karen, they’re reunited, the threats are gone...we should be done, right? But we’re not.

We start with another beautiful splash page in bed, but this one’s very different:

Karen’s confession and Matt’s forgiveness happen off-panel, described in the narration boxes here, and Matt’s response is basically “Eh, no worries,” which...like. I love Karen. I love Matt and Karen together. But she sold his deepest secret for a fix and left him disbarred and homeless. He nearly died! She and Foggy and Ben and Doris nearly died! Glori and Maggie will nearly die! Dozens of other people have died and will die before this story is over! It’s lovely that Matt forgives her but considering the grudge he bears for Foggy after all of this for...undisclosed crimes??? it’s a little pat.

Also pat: Matt appears to basically hug Karen through withdrawal. I appreciate how raw and painful the art makes it look, and how steady and loving he is, but here’s where the timeline gets slippery, and makes you wonder about the earlier timeline. How long was Matt out of it? How long did it take Karen to drive from an undisclosed location in the enormous country of Mexico to New York City? How long does her recovery take? Part of what makes the first three issues of the story work so well is that they’re so rapid-fire and claustrophic, with both time and space compressed to tiny ranges. You give it too much room to breathe and the reader starts going “Wait. It’s not over? How much more is left?”

Anyway, Foggy, bless his soul, is still trying to clear Matt’s name, and so is Ben:

This always reminds me of that meme where Person A is complaining loudly about Person B while dropping dozens of photos of them. Seriously, though, why do you have those glossy Harrison Ford-looking 8 x 10s of Matt in your briefcase, Foggy?

Honestly Foggy’s emotional reaction here doesn’t make a ton of sense, when you look at the events: 1. Matt’s apartment gets blown up while Matt is in serious legal and financial trouble. 2. Matt disappears for...weeks? Months? Unclear. 3. Karen shows up with a drug addiction and an abusive boyfriend. 4. Karen knocks Foggy out. 5. Foggy wakes up to find Karen gone and like eight people dead in the street outside his house, including said abusive boyfriend. CONCLUSION: Work on Matt’s appeal? FOGGY. WHAT.

“Matt’s always been kind of high strung.” brb dying

Ben thinks Glori’s got what it takes to work for the Bugle, so he takes her with him to talk to Nurse Lois, now in jail for her attempt on Doris’s life. However, one of the other reporters is a plant by Fisk, there to kill her before she can testify against Fisk:

Lois is killed, but Ben saves Glori. They’re both pretty shaken up by it, but they’ve got some damning evidence now.

Meanwhile, Matt is working as a short order cook at a Hell’s Kitchen diner.

Yes, really:

HILARIOUS but also, how much time has passed here? This is too much downtime, it doesn’t work.

Fisk, enraged by Matt’s continued ability to evade him and stay off the grid, plays his final card: he calls in “Nuke,” a deranged super soldier whose violent killing moods are triggered by red pills. (This is who Simpson from Jessica Jones is based on, btw.) Nuke, convinced he’s back in Vietnam, starts shooting up Hell’s Kitchen:

Matt changes to Daredevil and just barely manages to take Nuke down, but then the Avengers show up:

This is great art, but you see what I mean? Now this is a story about the toll Vietnam took on young American men? (I mean, Miller’s a baby boomer, everything he writes is a little bit about that, but still.) There’s a super soldier blowing up the Kitchen? The Avengers are here? TOO MUCH, FRANK. I get that what’s happening here is that Fisk loses his temper and allows his perfect, subtle trap to fall apart as he attempts to swat a fly with a sledgehammer, but narratively it just feels like an excellent four-issue arc with a weird two-issue coda that shares none of the same themes.

That’s Glori in Steve’s arms, btw. She and Karen are both injured (but fine) and taken to Maggie’s church where their boyfriends can fuss over them:

This really isn’t a significant page but I couldn’t bring myself to cut Matt’s little smile there as Foggy rushes past him (presumably while “The Way We Were” plays in his mind - actually, he looks downright Redfordian there). IDK why Matt’s like “Alas, Foggy and I are No More” - it’s another emotional note that doesn’t make a whole lot of sense.

Meanwhile, Steve decides to investigate this whole Nuke thing and discovers that he was an attempt to replicate Captain America, of course. Again, see what I mean? Why is Steve a point of view character, suddenly? Why is this about a military conspiracy? WHAT HAPPENED TO MY CLAUSTROPHIC GRITTY NOIR?

Nuke breaks out and attacks Hell’s Kitchen again. The military deploys soldiers to stop him this time, and despite Steve and Matt trying to subdue Nuke non-fatally, one of the soldiers shoots him. Matt desperately tries to get Nuke to medical help before he dies so that he can testify:

No dice. Nuke dies...but his body is still evidence, so Matt takes it to someone who can do something about it:

The religious themes are mostly gone by now, but note that Nuke is in an inverted version of Matt’s pose from the beginning of #4. Matt was miraculously alive, though, while Nuke...well.

With this, plus Glori’s photos from Rikers and from Nuke’s attack on Hell’s Kitchen, Fisk’s empire starts to crumble:

He doesn’t go to jail, but his veneer of respectability is gone, and he becomes the most famous criminal in America. As appearances are very important to Fisk, he’s furious. His only consolation is that Matt must be equally miserable.

...Or is he?

Aw, they’re in love. There are still many threads left untied, mostly having to do with how Matt and Karen are unemployed and squatting in a Hell’s Kitchen tenement, but look how happy they are! Let’s call this a happy ending. Daredevil doesn’t get very many of them.

And that, my friends, is Born Again. Next up: Ann Nocenti and Typhoid Mary!

[winstonhcomedy]

“Dope A-F” - 5/15-5/26 - “Saving The Environment, A Raffle, Woman Of The Year, Fire In Pittsburgh, Canon and Draw, The After Show, Punk Rock and The Winstmas Games, and Annapolis”

Boom another week down and another round of shows to write about. Don’t you wish you comedy was hot like me! OOOOOOO WEEEE LAYDEES! It is time to get down to the nitty gritty of it and talk about some hot ass shows!

5/15

I had a few shows this night. I was not ready for one of them even a little bit. Sarah Ahmed had booked me to do a set in front of the league of conservation voters. She told us to do political/environmental based material for 5 to 7 minutes. I took this to heart and worked really hard to try to come up with something. So I planned to propose a New Green New Deal with a primary focus on farts effects on the environment.

The show was at Blue Bee Cider and it was gong to be early in the night at around 5:30. So I got off work and headed straight there. When I got there Sarah pulled in behind me and I helped her set up. I also got to meet her father in law, and we all had a good conversation. I told her how nervous I was and she told me it was going to be fine.

I relaxed for a bit as more comics showed up. Anne Meng, Grace Manno, Kate Carroll, Jesse Hill Jr, and Mu were all on the show. Grace and I both had a drawing component in our bit, so she decided to tell a story about her crazy upbringing by eco warriors.

The conservation voters started to show up, and it actually started to fill up pretty nicely. Sarah is dressed as Earth. The show starts and they are definitely not an audience into comedy. Sarah does a bit where she is complaining about how hot it is and she is smoking a cigarette.. Each comic goes up and keeps trying to crack them open. No one does horribly, but it is just weird. Everyone was trying ecological humor, and some of it hits, but then they’d transition into their acts and it just felt weird and off. People got laughs, but they deserved more than they got.

Mu went up before me and he did what I should have done. He did about 45 seconds of ecological material and then said screw it and just did his act. They definitely responded to this better than anyone else. He had the best set of the night, and a lot of that was due to him not really restricting himself to doing 5 minutes of jokes he wrote that week. Definitely a solid set.

I went up next and by all outside accounts I did well. It felt horrible to do. My bit involved me pretending I just found out about climate change so I had to do something drastic to try and fix it. I came up with a taxable fart chart of all farts we should tax. This color coded pie chart included, old people farts, dog farts, cow farts, my farts, queefs (female only tax but only at 70% of regular tax), and Donald Trump’s farts. This got a laugh and was silly, but the tags I did after didn’t really work. I think they truly believed I didn’t know what climate change was.

I then went into another part where I explained that since we can’t tax cows we needed to murder them all to save the planet. This would create jobs since I would be training highly skilled assassins to kill the cows (Calf Team Six). I then had a drawing of a cow farting with a birthday cone hat on. Then I showed another drawing of me killing the cow with a series of guns, swords, and a nuclear bomb. I had also stolen the birthday cap in this drawing. All in all I am very proud of it. I did 5 minutes of environmental material, and even though it didn’t hit as hard as I wanted at all. People paid attention, and on the video it got some nice laughs.

I then just did 5 minutes of my material. That started off weak because it switched up the energy. I closed strong with a teaching joke, and every time I shit on myself and the room for not liking comedy it got a laugh as well. This is the most solid of a C I can give myself. I challenged myself to write and do something different and it succeeded. I now have more confidence to accept and do gigs like this. I could have gotten a better response if I had just done material and crowd work, but I am so proud I didn’t.

Some people talked to me about the show afterwards. They seemed to enjoy it quite a bit. Sarah reassured me it went better than I felt it did. I truly did not feel good at all about it until I rewatched it later. While on stage it felt like I was drowning in the water from a million melted ice caps. After I packed up I found out the second mic I was going to go to was cancelled, and that the other one I could have done had already started.

So I decided to head over to En Su Boca to eat with Bryan Williams and Alex Castagne. Bryan and I talked for about 40 minutes while we waited for our table to be ready. We sat down and Alex showed up about another 30 minutes later. I ordered some delicious wings, and chips. They got a burrito and tacos. After this Alex headed back to his place and Bryan and I headed to the only mic left tonight at Home Sweet Home.

I get there and it is the first night Jason Kusterer will be hosting. It is a pretty good turnout of comedian, but there is almost no audience. He decides to start it about 20 minutes late while waiting for comedians to get there. A lot of people show up including John Thomas, Bryan, Brandon, Alex, Tom Hall, and a lot of others. It is a super fun hang, and Jason has the meeting and asks if I mind going first. I tell him sure, and get my set ready.

We go upstairs and the comics fill in the room. There are a few new faces, and maybe three or four noncomics. Jason goes first and does ok before bringing me up. I go up and work on new stuff. Everything gets a good response, and I am really loving how these jokes are working out. I think I am a few weeks away from getting these jokes kind of done. I’d give this set a B. Everything worked even though it was just comics. I get off stage and watch the next few comics.

There was a queer German born comic who was on her way back from doing a comedy festival down south. She had some good stuff, and you could tell she was doing her tightest five. It worked and the people really dug it. This was shaping up to be a good ass show.

I grab my stuff and head downstairs. I said my goodbyes and handed out some hugs. I then hopped in my car and got out of there asap.

5/16

The next night I was returning to Kindred Spirit Brewing out in Goochland. My friend Stella who came and checked out my headlining spot a month ago was on this month’s show. I had asked for a guest spot on it since there were no open mics this night.

I get there super early and I have no idea how the show is going to go. It is a benefit for the Leukemia, and Lymphoma society. They are expecting a pretty big crowd so I am ready for it. My buddy John Marg is hosting it so I know it will at least be a fun hang.

Mike Ward runs the whole thing and he shows up and says one of the other comics has dropped out so he asked me to close out the show. I humbly obliged. We are getting closer and closer to show time and people are starting to pile in. I think at the show’s peak there was about 100 people in there.

They were also doing a raffle to get people to donate money, and buy tickets. People were also a little rowdy. This was a benefit, but they definitely came to have fun. John goes up first and sets the mood. He has a good hosting set, and draws a few raffle prizes. He makes sure everyone is paying attention before he brings up the first comic.

The first dude is some guy who used to do comedy a long time ago. He goes up and does 15 and gets a really good response. A lot of the jokes are things that I feel like I have heard or seen on memes, but honestly that doesn’t really matter to this crowd. He gets some really big laughs, and had them going throughout the set. He did well.

After this Mike goes up and he struggles a bit. He has a hard time getting them to pay attention. His set goes for about 20 minutes and people just seem kind of disinterested in the show, and are getting pretty loud in the back. He is working hard, and gets some laughs, but you could tell people had come to specifically see the previous dude.

Then Stella goes up. She was supposed to do 17+ but she ended up doing about 12 or 13. This was a completely different type of room for her. It was a big crowd, they were drunk, rowdy, and you had to be able to work to get them. She definitely learned a lot, and some stuff worked. Super dope she took this gig though. These are the types of gigs I used to take all the time when I started. Low or no paying, rowdy, crowd not really into comedy, and just having to work your ass off. It makes you more versatile and helps to make you bulletproof.

By this point it is looking bleak. People are leaving, it is towards the ned of the show, they have a few raffle prizes left, and it is getting late. I am foaming at the mouth to get on stage and just get it over with. I told John to light me at 15 because I only had to do 20 and I wanted to be able to get off as soon as I was ready.

I go up and just go right into crowd work. I address how loud everyone is. I start talking about how people change during raffles. How it makes you want to kill the people who win. Especially if they win more than one thing. This gets people involved. I directly address the people in the back, and the people talking and that gets some laughs as well. I am kind of on a roll. So I use the first 10 or so minutes only on crowd work. It is destroying.

After this I get the raffle girl who was named “woman of the year” for god knows what. I then draw two raffle tickets. They are both won by the same dude. I am selling my surprise and it is destroying. He actually poses in front of me to take pictures and I give the camera the finger. My fake frustration is really selling it all.

I then draw one last raffle ticket and read everything up until the last number. I then put it in my back pocket and make them wait for the end of my set. I then do 15 minutes of new material with a few pauses to keep crowd involved. Everything works, and honestly it was a great set. I finish and get a good response. I’d give this set an A. I really rose to the occasion and am super proud of this set.

Afterwards I talk comedy with Stella and John for a bit. I then get everything together and talk to some people. We take some photos and I find out they raised a good amount of money which feels awesome. I then grab my stuff and head home because I am exhausted.

5/17

The next night I am booked to headline a show in Charlottesville at The Guerrilla Theatre hosted by Heather Kilburn. The lineup is Heather, Ben Wasserman (NYC), Sam Padgett, Kate Carroll, Brandon Beswick and myself. I get there early to set up my camera and chill.

It is a small black box theatre. People started to show up and we realized it was going to be a fun, lively, and intimate show. We are all hanging in the back and you can tell Heather is nervous because it is her first time hosting a standup show.

We get about 30 people in a room that seats 40, and she decides to start the show. She gets the crowd in the mood, and feels them out. Then she brings up Ben. Ben does mostly audience participation/crowd work. He also started his set off with a song parody. Def had an alt vibe, and the audience seemed to enjoy it. It was a good opening set.

After him went Sam and then Kate. They both weaved in and out of having home on their side, losing them, and then getting them back. It was fun to watch. Then Brandon went up and had a really strong set. He had some bit hit harder than I’d heard them hit for a long time. He closed crazy strong and I knew I had to bring it.

I went up and had to work to win them over up top. Stuff was going over ok, and each joke did better than the last. I finally started to do really well in the middle. I had a hot first 25 and then I had to start checking my notes because of how much old and new stuff I was doing. People were really enjoying it and the last 10 went well as well. My closer hit pretty hard and I’d give this whole set a B-. Cool I was able to do 25 without crowd work, and without checking my notes. It was also cool that some of the newer bits are really coming into their own.

After the show all the comics and audience left, but Heather had made pasta for anyone that wanted any. I hung out with her, her step dad, her sister, and some of her friends/fellow improvisors for about an hour. It was a really fun way to unwind. I then decided to drive straight to Fairfax to stay at Tjs place since we were leaving in the morning to go to Pittsburgh.

5/18

The next morning I woke up and TJ and I went to go grab lunch while we waited for Kevin Tit (DC comic) who was going to ride up with us to Pittsburgh. We decided to go to Freddy’s Steakburgers, and I absolutely fell in love. I got a bacon cheeseburger, a half and half shake, and a large fry and some fry sauce. I ate every last piece of it. TJ and I both destroyed our burgers. I hadn’t had a fast foot burger that good in a very long time.

During this time Kevin messaged the group chat and said he wasn’t going to make it so TJ and I grabbed out stuff and headed on the road. It was about a four hour ride up there. We talked comedy, listened to music, I napped a bit, and we stopped for some candy on the way up. The time went by pretty quickly. The craziest thing I saw was on the side of the road near Pittsburgh there was a car engulfed in flames. I had never seen anything like it in person. You could see the smoke from like a mile away.

We got to the venue and parked in the garage before going inside of the Arcade Comedy Theatre. We were there super early. We went in the green room  and just chilled. TJ passed out and I started dumping video files from my camera, and clearing off space on my laptop. The dude working the sound booth gave us a tour of the venue and it is a killer space with an upstairs and a downstairs room.

The first comic showed up. Her vibe was throwing me off. She was nice, but seemed aloof. Was making comments that honestly were stressing me the hell out. She was saying things like I always run the light, I don’t know what I’m doing, and stuff like that. I don’t know, but I was fraeking. Then she mentioned how new she was to comedy and it made me feel instantly better. My knee jerk anxiety had now subsided, and I was just super excited for the show.

The rest of the comics showed up including Robert Punchur and the host Ed Bailey. They usually have a brewery sponsor the show and have some free beer for the audience but apparently some comics and the brewery bailed. So we all got to do a little more time. Two other comics showed up to hang out and they were pretty cool too. It was a fun hang.

the show started and there was a pretty good crowd there. They were tight and you had to work. Ed went up and did well with some crowd work. Then the female comic went up and got some laughs as well.

I went up and had a super fun set. I was able to crack the audience. I did 15 without notes and crowd work. I was able to float in and out of my material and got some super good pops. Some things didn’t kill, but they did get the audience looser. I’d give my set a B.

After me was Robert and he did about 20 and did well. Then TJ went up and worked his butt off. He closed with like 25 and worked new in with old. It was a super fun show. Afterwards we hopped right in his car and headed back. We arrived at his place at like 3 am and we passed right out! A super fun trip.

5/20

This night was pretty laid back. I was doing the Southern’s open mic. I got there a little early. I wasn’t feeling great but I got some hanging out in. I grabbed a burger with Alex, Paige, and Chris.

I was going up fifth. I tried some newer stuff and it worked ok. Nothing killed. There wasn’t a huge crowd. some of the new stuff I tried to work out. I’d give my set a D.

I left pretty quickly after this because of how bad I was feeling. All in all it wasn’t that memorable of a night. It was pretty disappointing, but I was excited for our show there Friday.

5/22

I had a couple shows this night. I was booked by Melissa Harris and Dylan Vattelana for their first showcase at Canon and Draw in Richmond. I was super stoked. They were going to be using my PA system for the show so I headed right over after work.

I got there about 4:15 and brought all of my stuff in. I then did some video editing while I waited for Dylan and Melissa to get there. Once they arrived we set up the PA and she took a few pictures. Then we just hung out and waited for the audience to get there. Dylan and I played Mario Kart Double Dash, and people started to come in.

The format was going to be Dylan hosting then Anthony Thompson, myself, and then Kate Carroll for the showcase. Then after that there would be an open mic. By the time Dylan went up there was a really good sized crowd there. This was going to be fun. There was two people who were there when we set up and said they were staying for comedy since they were from out of town (Austin). They then they left almost immediately when Dylan started.

The only problem was that you could barely hear Dylan. We had done  a sound check at the beginning, but we had done it with both speakers set up. Melissa and Dylan had taken one down because they wanted the logo in the pictures. This is fine, but we didn’t recheck sound.

So after Dylan’s set we adjusted it, and Anthony went up. He had a very strong set. He got people’s attention, and his jokes were hitting which is a killer combo. The show was really rolling at this point.

Then it was my turn. I went up, and tried to get the crowd back into my rhythm. I started a little slow, but I didn’t want to do crowd work for this set. I wanted them to like my jokes. Luckily they did. I was able to get all of my material going. It was all hitting, and I managed to close pretty strong. This was a solid B set. I did about 16 minutes and I wish I could have gone longer.

Kate went up after me and she had her lulls, but she was able to get them back. The open mic was next. From what I heard everybody on the mic was having a solid set. The audience stayed, and that’s always a good sign.

I went outside and some audience members came outside and talked to us about how good the show was. They gave us a lot of compliments and it was a good vibe.

Anthony and I had a nice long talk about comedy. What we want to do with it, and where we want to go. It was nice to catch up and just shoot the shit for a while.

When the show ended a table talked to me about my set. I got some follows on social media, and they mentioned wanting to do a brunch show sometime and I told them they definitely should. I said my goodbyes and turned around and saw that Dylan and Melissa had already packed up my stuff. I got John Marg to help me take it to my car before heading over to McCormacks.

I get to McCormacks and it is an ok crowd. The comics in the back were all mostly knew and were already kind of in a conversation so I sat off to the side. I got my set ready because I was going first.

Jessie went up and had an ok set. The crowd was paying attention but they were small. I just wanted to get some new stuff out and see what worked. He calls me up and I was really pleased with my open mic set. It was all you can ask for in a mic. I’d give it a B-. People paid attention, I got some good pops, and I know where to take my jokes. I said goodbye and headed straight home.

5/23

My mental health was taking a deep dive all week. This was when it started to get really rough. I had wanted to get caught up on the blog this day, but I kept telling myself no one wanted to read it and I should just give it up. So I put it off another day.

I had two open mics this day though so I had to keep my head up and be ready to work through some material. The first was at The Camel. Jameson was hosting, but was letting Patrick Buhse host the second half of the show.

I got there early and did some writing. Francesca, Jarvis, Buhse, Muñoz, Jameson, Kusterer, Richard Woody and a few others showed up. We were all hanging out, and I really needed it. They had no idea how these interactions really were helping my mental health.

Kusterer and Jarvis were the headliners, and there was a couple comics before them. I was so in my own head that I didn’t get to enjoy Jarvis and Kusterer’s sets the way I wanted to. Kusterer kept pretending to be the bouncer, but the crowd was kind of dead. He got some pops, and he kept playing with the light Jameson was using. Jarvis then went up and did his act, but the whole crowd was just weird.

Buhse started the next part and then it was my turn. I went up and bombed my dong off. I got maybe a few laughs. I couldn’t connect, and I was just trying to get the wording right.  I’d give this set a D-. It felt like absolute shit.

I then headed over to Penny Lane to hang out and destress. Eventually a few other comics showed up. Anthony and Beswick were there. Along with Stella. We were all shooting the shit and enjoying it. Then out of nowhere Jericho Davidson (NYC) showed up. He’s a super dope dude and comic. He was down for a show that weekend and came in a night early to hang. It was super dope to see him and joke around.

The show started and Muñoz said I was after him. Muñoz did some crowd work and got a lady on stage with him and had her singing. it was incredibly crazy and weird. I could tell this was going to be a rough show. When I went up I couldn’t connect. I felt like half of my stuff worked. None of it hit as hard as it should have. The only joke that worked was the one I closed with about rough sex. I get off stage and go in the back. Then Beswick goes up and has the same luck. He didn’t do so hot either.

We then both watch Stella. She bombs too, but the best part was some woman said she wasn’t funny so she just started talking about how she thought the woman had on an ugly dress. The audience hated her for it. It was her first experience with that and she felt terrible. We told her it happens, and it was a learning experience. After shooting the shit a little bit more I headed home. I had a long day at work the next day (subbing in a different program), my head was in a shitty space, and I needed rest.

5/24

This was a show I had been looking forward to until this week. Honestly I was in a horrible place all week and was worried this show was going to be terrible. Tonight was The After Show. This is the politically focused show hosted by Chris Alan. I am the fact checker, and the dude who gives them the topics. 

The lineup was a fun one. We had Anne Meng, Kenn Edwards, Sam Padgett, and Will Jones (local barber/small business owner/activist). I got to the show early because I was in a bad headspace. I was super nervous because I had a falling out with a comic over a sensitive issue. Luckily we made up shortly before the show started. So that relieved a lot of my anxiety.

I was nervous because it was Memorial Day weekend that we would not have a very large crowd. I was right. It was the most poorly attended show we have put on in the main room. I would say we had about 30 people there. Which isn’t awful, but was extremely disappointing. 

We finally decided to start the show. I brought everyone out and we jumped right into it. The first ten minutes or so it was weird. Honestly the vibe in the room was everyone was super uptight. it felt like this was going to be a super shitty show. We couldn't get a single big pop, and Chris was rubbing people the wrong way. I don’t think the audience knew what to make of the show.

I finally broke through and got a huge pop when we were talking about Ayesha Curry’s comments. This led to the show turning out to be amazing. It was equal parts hilarious, heartfelt, informative, and important. We covered a lot of ground. We talked about the KKK coming to Dayton and tied it back into what happened in Charlottesville last year, the Alabama abortion bill, gay rights in Africa, and a lot of others. I’d give the whole show a B. It was way better than it had any right to be. the crowd bought into it and we had a blast. 

After the show I got a lot of compliments from people about how I did. I was able to get a lot of pops on my jokes, and still able to steer the conversation. It felt really good to do. Also got told that like 15 minutes into the show a dude tried to get his money back. He was a Trump supporter and he thought the show was going to be way more focused on comedy instead of half and half. The crazy thing is I think we said Trump’s name once during the whole show. He wasn’t the focus. 

Chris and I both try to not make this a show of division. We almost never talk about political parties at all. We just talk about our own opinions, and the issues. We have guests of different backgrounds on to make sure multiple sides are represented. Just really funny to have a Trump guy be a snowflake for once. On a side note I am not mad he left. He did the right thing. If you don’t like the show leave. He didn’t interrupt, and he wasn’t rude. Which is a lot more than I can say for a lot of the SJWs who get upset at a joke. 

We hung out outside for a little bit, and I talked to Kenn therapy. I need to get my head better, and honestly this week was the final straw. I have a lot of work to do in my life. I don’t want to miss out on some of the best things in my life just because I am stubborn and not seeing a therapist who can actually help me. 

5/25

The next day I feel like dogshit. The only positive is I have a show at Castleburg Brewery in RVA. I am getting to do an episode of The Winstmas Games which I am super stoked about. Then that will be followed by a concert by The Alex Jonestown Massacre.

I get there pretty early and start to get everything ready. I am just trying to distract my brain from all of the bad thoughts so I do some video editing and writing. Eventually Kenn, Pat Miller, and Mike Engle (comics/members of AJM) show up and set up for the concert. 

There isn’t a crowd at all, but I am still hopeful it is going to be fun. I help set up, and get the games ready for the podcast. The teams are AJM vs Brandon Beswick, Amita Rao (improviser), and Jason Kusterer.

Brandon has to leave by 8 to get to his Improv show. So that meant we couldn’t do a super long episode, which honestly was ok with me. At around 7:15 we got started because we actually had about a dozen people there. Which is a fine sized crowd for me. At 7 we had nobody other than a couple coworkers who came out. It was dope to have their support. 

The show was actually insanely good. It was one of the funnier episodes I had done and it made me wish I could do it live every week. It was about a 40 minute episode and it got laughs all the way through. Everybody did really well, and I had some true belly laughs. It is such a fun feeling to get this show to work. I’d give it a B+ all the way around. 

I then hung out and watched the concert. It was really fun. I hadn’t seen them in a super long time. It was just so nice to not have bad stuff on my mind. Unfortunately as soon as the show ended they all came rushing back. After the show Kenn talked to me about this meditation app. I decided that it was worth a shot. He told me what to email them and I got a free year to use it. Hopefully I am able to make an even bigger change in my life. I am determined to be ok with myself, and work towards fulfillment. I am tired of feeling this way. 

I say my goodbye’s and head home. I have one more show this weekend and it is in Annapolis. I know it is going to be a long day tomorrow

5/26

The next day I wake up at around 9. I do my first day of meditation and I actually enjoy it. I know it is going to take al to of work to maintain it, but I am willing to do anything to help.  I then go take a nap for an hour or so. I wake up and head to Chris Alan’s house. He is going to drive us up to Annapolis for our show at Harvest restaurant hosted by Matt Brown. 

I get to Chris and we head out. We have an argument about Albanese gummy bears. He had posted online they were terrible, but I told him that his favorite gummy bears (7-11 brand/Sheetz brand) is just repackaged Albanese. He didn’t believe me. So we bought a bag of each and I made him do a taste test in the car. You have no idea how satisfying it was for him to eat them both and have to begrudgingly say they are the same and he actually likes Albanese better than Haribo. 

He always makes food posts on fb to upset people. So he told me he was going to do an apology one which I can’t wait for. So now I have something to look forward to for the next  few days. 

We talk about music, life, comedy, my depression, and all other things on the way up there. It is a nice peaceful drive and we don’t hit a ton of traffic. Then we get into Annapolis it is giving us a bit of anxiety. The streets are all really narrow, there isn’t a lot of parking, and there are a ton of people out. 

We finally get a spot right in front of the venue and we walk around,. We go look at the shops, restaurants, and the water. After walking around a bit we meet Matt at the venue. We go in and order some food. Chris got wings and fries, and I went with the carne asada. They both looked really good, and mine tasted good too. We then head upstairs to get ready for the show. 

It is crazy hot this day, and the venue’s air conditioning was not working at all. So it was brutal upstairs. We wait an extra fifteen minutes for the show to fill in and then we start it up. Matt goes up and gets the crowd going. IT takes him a bit, but they start to warm up. Then there is a female comic who I don’t remember who goes up, and she is followed by a dude I’ve never met before. The girl doesn’t do too hot, and the dude had a pretty strong set. He got the ball rolling. 

After him was Jamie Benedi who I think is a super funny/weird joke writer. I was curious to see how this day drunk Memorial Day weekend crowd would dig him. They did not vibe with him at all. The jokes were great, but they just didn’t get on his wave length and couldn't connect. 

After he got off it was my turn and I used the first few minutes to kind of rest the room. I just did crowd work, and got them to get on my side. I was working my ass off. I was getting laughs all the way throughout, but there was one dude who seemed super drunk and seemed to not care about what I was saying at all. My material did ok, and I was doing really well in the middle. I closed weaker than I wanted, but it was all in all a pretty good set. I’d say it was a solid B. 

After me Chris went up and had a super hot one. He leaned in with his material and did a lot of crowd work. I always feel so dumb when I don’t do crowd work for my whole set, because I know I could have killed harder. All of Chris material and crowd work went over great. He is a killer comic and always a blast to watch.

There was supposed to be a big storm so we left as soon as he got off stage. We had a nice and peaceful drive back. We talked about the show and his upcoming show doing Tuesdays With Stories live at the Comedy Cellar at Village Underground. It was a great ride, and helped me stay occupied. After getting back to his place I drove home, and tried to fall asleep. Although I was having a hard time. I eventually passed out

I DID IT I DID IT! I didn’t let my depression keep me from doing the blog. I had the next two days off. They weren’t the best days, but I am so hopeful for my mental health. I’m taking a lot of the right steps and trying to make things right in my life. 

The meditation is really helping me a lot. I also exercised. I think I have decided that until I figure out these issues a move isn’t in my best interest. I need to fix me before I start moving hundreds of miles away from my support system. This was a tough decision to come to, but I came to it for a ton of reasons. This is what I need to do and I am very happy with that decision. 

Thanks for everything. I love you all very much. I am not going to miss out on the dopest thing in my life. So I’ve got to get this right. LOVE YOU LAYDEES!!!!

[micleadd7]

Social media

Just add me on Facebook. Did you see my lunch the other day on Instagram? CleverBets2017 is now following you.You have been added to the whats app group Jeans 40th birthday. I guarantee at some point in the last few years you have all heard these things be you a Twitterer, Facebooker, Instagrammer, whatsapper or otherer (there's always an otherer) the crazy world that is socialising and social media absorbs your daily being, turning you into a mindless scrolling zombie. Flicking from one app to the next without a care in the world. Have we forgotten the days of calling people for a chat in the kitchen because that's where the phone is? looking through pictures you have had developed from holidays gone by? TEXT MESSAGING!?  HAVE WE LOST OUR WAY IN A BLUR OF CLICK  BAIT ARTICLES, MEMES AND COMMENT SECTIONS ON GROUPS THAT OFFEND THE PEOPLE WHO NEED TO BE OFFENDED!!  Let's start at the beginning.

Firstly I must point out the thing that makes most of this possible, the enabler of such activity, without it people would sit in a bar by themselves waiting for their friends awkwardly, the smart phone. Iphone/Samsung/Pigeon carrier whatever you are you have the tech literally at your fingertips to engage with anyone anywhere at any point. Bluetooth, 4g, WIfi, order a taxi, order a pizza for the taxi, watch TV, listen to the radio, I mean what is there that your smartphone does not do? What happened to the days of 3 ringtones per phone, polyphonic nonetheless, the genius that was snake, phones that when you dropped them instead of the screen smashing into a thousand pieces you feared for every bone in your foot. Now you have a bing, ding or some other strange noise you've never heard before and that's it, you are taken away into the online world forever, well not forever but at least for the foreseeable.

Ok anyway the beginning, well maybe not the beginning let's not forget Myspace with its click counter and putting your friends in order of who you liked the most. But no the real beginning for me has to be the arrival of Facebook. Facebook changed the boundaries of social etiquette in so many ways. People; be it dates, friends, random weirdos at a party or work no longer exchange phone numbers or show pictures. No no that's no longer necessary, ‘What's your full name?’ That is necessary, and a whole lot simpler to try and guess than a long list of numbers. Yes a person's full name is all you need for a full back catalogue of the last 10 years of anyone's life. Pictures, relationships, family members, age, home town, which spice girl you dressed up as at your local school disco it's all there, waiting for you, willing you to find it! More info than any sane human being should be able to process after 5 minutes of facebook stalking someone. Oh yes that's the other thing, I mean another thing, there are many things. Facebook stalking someone is widely known and accepted. As if this level of intense research into someone's life is any different from actual stalking. Looking through Katies pictures from her trip to Benidorm in 2003, specifically pausing on the bikini clad pics is just as creepy as standing outside her house in the rain hoping to steal a glimpse of her in the shower. Katie if you are reading this you can't prove anything. I guess the difference being is Katie put those pictures on Facebook right? So she wanted people to see them right? Her friends right? In which case she should be ok with her friends waiting outside her window in the rain, trying to get a glance at some sideboob action. Not sure why it has to be raining but it just does.

So what's your name? Add me on facebook. If they are interesting enough you trudge through making opinions on things. The thing is Facebook is a keyhole into someone's life that they want you to see. We all know this yet we all forget it. People (and when I say people I mean everyone) are fabricating whole lives through social media. Informing overs about brilliant family get togethers, forgetting the 16 arguments that occurred on the day and merely commenting on the pictures with everyone smiling. Adding road trip tags about how awesome the journey was even though Dave was asleep the whole way and Nick wouldn't stop farting. Or there's the amazing stays in hotels or brilliant 5 star meals or BBQing with every friend possible… You can forgive people for wanting to only post the most exciting parts of their  lives, I do the exact same thing but just once i'd like flick open the app and see:

Katie is thinking about staring at a tree.

It would probably get the same amount of likes anyway!

All that being said there are several scenarios that have grown into the very fabric of FB. Those things that happen which we all know about but either ignore, forget or are apart of. The ground to cover here is vast so I will move quickly;

The sheer anger towards each other in comment sections on a post nobody can even remember after the 45 replies is embarrassing.And it always ends with someone correcting someone else's fucking grammar, And no Michael Jackson isn't just here for the comments and popcorn.

People who re-post nonsense that starts with, ‘Most of your friends won't have the guts to re-post this’ can all suck a bag of dicks.

People who still play games and still send out invites - HOW ARE YOU STILL DOING THIS?

Click bait articles in which you never get the answer to the question posed in the headline which just makes me so mad I want to argue with anyone in the comments section.

When you see people still fraping each other and it depends on your mood as to if it's funny or not that MIke loves huge cocks.

And then there's this;

Saying Happy birthday on your birthday. I kid you not I have both posted happy birthday on a good friend's wall when he changed it for a joke looking like I have no idea when his birthday is and also missed a good friend's birthday because they took it down from Facebook. In fact the alert of someone's birthday on every single morning of every single day reminds me that i'm still friends with that person on here and that I should remove them from my Friends list, HAPPY BIRTHDAY INDEED! I do enjoy the Happy Birthdays on my birthday though, I wonder how many friends I lose on that day. Imagine that last sentence attached to real life, ‘I wonder how many friends I lose on my birthday’. Yeah thanks Facebook.

After all that nonsense there's then the people which I always say I will never be but will never know until I get there, Mums and Dads. The people who feel the need to show their children off to the whole internet every time he/she sneezes. Don't get me wrong, new parents I understand, absolutely, but there's a point where it surely must stop.

So proud of little Tommy here he is on:

His first day at school. 20 likes

At a swimming Gala 30 likes

Riding a bike 35 likes

Sleeping 100 likes.

FUCK OFF, i'm serious. How Is it that parents manage to escape the ability to realise that nobody else on earth is as interested in their child as much as they are. Well apart from the Savilles of the world but surely that's just adding to reasons why little Tommy on a bike should be kept to exactly that. I mean you wouldn't walk up to a stranger in the street and go, hey guy look at my kid in his new school Uniform, you like? Just give me a thumbs up and then tell all your mates to come look and give me a thumbs up as well.

Saying that I want to see pictures of your kids (sounds odd) about as much as I want to see pictures of your dinner. A friend of mine whatsapped me the other month (because nobody texts anymore. You all have that one friend that still texts you and you can't understand why) asking if i'd seen his dinner from the night before. What on earth happened before facebook/Instagram? Did people invite the neighbours over to look at their food before telling them to go away so they could eat it? Stupid thing is if someone stalks me ON FACEBOOK long enough i'm probably guilty of this myself. If like me as well you grew up with facebook when it first became a thing, I was at UNI. Hundreds of pictures of me being drunk and doing stupid things went up over a 3 year period. I was completely oblivious to the concept that my Parents Aunties/Uncles and all relatives may at some point join this network, leaving a huge window into my life open for anyone to see. Adam why are you in a shopping trolley at 6am? At least it's not my dinner!!!

While Facebook was the poster boy for socialising online there were many other apps following suit which had you mindlessly scrolling through smart phones as if other people were simply not in the room. To coin a phrase, does your phone want a drink? If it's not instagram with its crazy hashtags, #blog #tumblr #words #life #trees #Lettuce it's Twitter with well it's crazy hashtags, or SnapChat or Tinder or Fuckafish. I made that last one up but i'll bet if I had a quick look I would find an app for such means, probably endorsed by Bear Grylls.

With all this mindless scrolling going on we venture into the world of whatsapp. Past the causal 1-2-1s you have with your friends where you send constant pictures of yourself smiling like an idiot because you are bored of checking if your twitter post has been retweeted, there's the groups. Not as in Louis got the groups but the groups. You will have a group of friends group, a different group of friends group but with certain friends from the first group in that group, a family group and birthday group, a work group, without that dick from finance, a travelling in the car somewhere that nobody comments in anymore because you went wherever you were going group, a holiday group, a friend's pet group a... you get the picture. Your life is taken over when you wake up to 50 unread messages, mostly because Nick posted a funny meme or Rachel wants the money for the birthday present.You reply as thoroughly as you can copy and pasting Nick's now that you've woken up hilarious meme into several other groups,  pleased with the joke stealing laughs you are getting. Even if they all seem to be out loud. You find you have lost hours of the day communicating with people you could have just gone to see.

Further to that time wasting notion the creators then bought you whatsapp.web. Allowing you to have the app on your desktop, a sort of throwback to Messenger but with less smileys in people's titles and no nudge function. Shame on the no nudge function, loved having the feeling of a headache portrayed on a computer. So yes Whats app on your computer. At home. At work more like. With a million and one things to do, you are busy chatting to friends, family members and anyone who wants to listen. Tweeting about something completely unimportant, clicking through picture after picture of a lovely pie and mash or cheese board or a dog's dinner on Instagram only stopping to briefly stalk that girl you met last night on Facebook, she didn't give you her number but that's ok you don't need that. You've got a complete overview of what she's been doing for the last 10 years or so.Hell you don't even need an umbrella, it's not raining in your office.