#i love nick valentine a lil too much

[wolf-in-a-trenchcoat]

Someone please write mxm Nick Valentine fics because I would not be able to pull it off. There's too many fem!reader ones and we need to balance out the playing field before I set it on fire. (If there are any I just can't find, please rec them to me otherwise I may cry.)

[ma1dita]

crazy little thing

a ‘partners in crime’ installment - luke castellan x dionysus!reader

words: 3.4k

summary: (pre-established relationship) The one where he spends all his drachmas to make you smile. Sometimes, the Apollo kids are better matchmakers than Aphrodite herself. Everyone’s tired of you two dancing around each other. Luke Castellan x fem!Dionysus!reader

a/n: lil valentines day special though im working on more est. relationship fluff after this!! happy season 2 renewal babies

(posted 2/9/24 unbetaed)

—

“Come on, you gotta admit—it’s kinda funny!” 

Luke is met with blank stares at the camp store after he places a few drachmas onto the folding table in front of the Apollo kids. They’re not sure if he’s trying to convince them, or himself.

Because yeah, that’s the excuse he goes for, wanting to spend his savings on having them sing to a certain head counselor instead of admitting his blatantly obvious feelings, so if you ask Lee Fletcher and his half-siblings, it’s kind of pathetic.

“What do we look like, a traveling mariachi band, Castellan?” he deadpans, watching the usually confident boy scratch the back of his neck with his face red like someone who’s been sitting out in the sun for too long. 

“I’m not saying to follow her around all day or whatever, just pick a random time to sing a song and catch her off-guard,” he insists, before meeting the judgmental look of one of Lee’s younger siblings.

Lee chuckles, ruffling his sister’s hair before looking at Luke quite seriously, “She’s a good friend. You’re gonna have to pay us more than that. Special song for a special lady after all.”

The son of Hermes knows he’s gonna regret this sooner or later, but proceeds to throw the rest of his meager earnings onto the table. He has other ways of being resourceful anyway, the box of chocolates he nicked from behind the store counter feeling heavy in his jacket pocket.

“Right…she’s just a friend.”

Luke’s hands fidget at his sides as he stands there, feeling a little stupid.

Lee’s little sister scoops up the coins from the table, her raised eyebrows and light aura mirroring that of her older brother. 

“What song were you thinking?” she asks, “Gotta make sure I know it if I’m singing it to your…friend.”

The 18-year-old boy tugs at his dark curls, getting more embarrassed and wanting to retreat with every minute that passes, but he’s never been one to back down from anything–swordfights, monsters, capture the flag, but this—trying to impress you...is a whole different story somehow.

Why are feelings so damn complicated? 

It feels like being at the butt of a joke, or more accurately—at the sharp edge of a sword, and Luke never lets his fights end in a draw.

“You guys got it covered. Just…surprise me too, I guess,” he sighs, walking off without finishing his sentence. He wishes he could pray a little harder to his dad for luck, even if he’s unsure of what exactly he’s wishing for (or if his dad will even listen).

“Castellan’s hopeless. You think he knows it yet?” the girl asks her brother, to which Lee laughs.

“I don’t think she does either, even though everyone else can see right through them. The new bets are on who’s gonna break first. Chiron’s been keeping track, but don’t tell Mr. D.”

If Luke wants a show, they’ll make sure he’ll get his money’s worth—and hopefully, it’ll push you two along faster. Lee bet on you two getting together before the summer after all, and he’ll be damned if he loses to Clarisse.

—

Valentine’s Day might be the day of love, but for you, someone who’s single (not by choice), and heavily busy with making sure people aren’t so…enamored in public (you’ve lost count of the reports you’ve written out due to indecent behavior this morning alone)---this just feels like another Wednesday, except with more hormonal teenagers with uncontrollable urges than usual. 

Oh, the joys of being the daughter of the camp director, also known as everyone’s favorite narc.

Honestly, love can suck it. With this much love in the air, you can feel it suffocating you like a plastic bag over your head. 

That’s an uncontrollable urge. Too much?

Maybe Silena was right, you do need to open yourself up more to romantic opportunities. But if you have to watch another person swap spit and get pawed at like they’re the last dinner roll at the table….You might commit arson and set this place ablaze.

You just didn’t understand why people had to go all out today of all days. Shouldn’t love be shown year-round? Though you were a person of theatrics and enjoy a good show, it is amazing how much grandiose displays of affection make you cringe. It felt very performative, instead of genuine, and you would know, you’re the best actress at camp. You’ve acted out stories before, knowing all of the greatest romances and tragedies by heart. And you pride yourself on being a decent teacher to the campers, but for some of them, love still translates to a bad rendition of a ballad they heard on the radio.

Nothing gets past you at this point.

But that sucks too sometimes, you know?

Multiple failed flings and a heartbreak or two weigh down on you on days like this one, as you’re stuck being a bystander to outlandish displays put on by the Aphrodite kids being put to work. Love is their domain anyway, and yours…makes you feel a little less undesirable. Each demigod has their own strengths and weaknesses, but perhaps in the name of love, some of them don’t know how to take a hint. Several forgettable prose readings, a Sparknotes version of Eros and Psyche, and too many red roses to count have you reeling from exhaustion and a bit of disgust—-and it’s only lunchtime. 

So yeah, maybe you’re a little jealous; they could call you Nemesis at this point.

The only flowers you got today were from the little kids from along the path to the strawberry orchard, and though it’s sweet—the human side of you misses affection. 

Devotion. 

To be a daughter of Dionysus meant to deal in extremes, obsession or nothing, and there are very few people who can handle that. Always being too much to handle, or uninterested as a defense mechanism. Perhaps that’s what scares admirers away. 

That, or the fact that Luke Castellan is always attached to your hip. To be honest, you’ve always preferred it that way—the both of you working as a pair always gets things done faster around camp and he brightens your mood, whether you admit it or not. 

But you two are just friends. 

Really good friends who look for each other in crowded rooms, hands constantly brushing against the other for comfort, and able to pick up where the other one leaves off. Usually he’s the first person you see in the morning, and the last person you say goodnight to. You know how he likes his coffee and he cuts your apples for you as you two sit together in your unassigned seats in the dining pavilion. You watch each other’s workshops and if one of you is missing, everyone knows to ask the other to get an answer.

Right? That’s totally normal coworker/friend behavior.

If you were ever given immortality, perhaps they’d make you the goddess of denial.

You’re sweeping up confetti from the dining hall floor after an uncoordinated excuse of a flash mob was performed for one of the Demeter kids…and not to sound like a heinous bitch, but maybe next time they should use something biodegradable…or less messy. Sighing deeply, you feel someone’s eyes on you, and when you look up, Luke’s standing there with two full plates of food.

“Take a break, trouble. No one’s paying you overtime,” he jokes, and you roll your eyes as you put the broom aside.

“No one’s paying me at all…” you groan, before taking the plate out of his hands and knocking your head against his shoulder in thanks. He snickers as his hand brushes the small of your back, tickling your spine as he leads you to sit at a table.

“Just another holiday. You know how it is.”

“It’d be nice to have a night off though. Sometimes I regret taking up the position,” you mumble through spoonfuls of soup. He throws his large hand over your shoulder, kneading some tension from your trapezius. Head jerking along with the movements, you giggle as soup dribbles off your spoon, which makes his lips quirk into a small smile. Being around you felt so thoughtless and easy that if you told him to jump off a bridge he’d do it without question, which should be more concerning—the hold you have on him is irrevocable. Feelings are way too difficult for his teenage brain to comprehend at this stage. It’s easier to wash dishes with lava or fight off a dragon (bad example, he knows, but there’s something about you that already makes him feel like he’s losing before anything’s even happened).

Luke is someone who fights until the end, a soldier who’s always trained and so ready that sometimes it makes you wonder what war he’s preparing for. Infatuation, or the scarier, four-letter word was not something he was ever briefed on.

“No, you don’t. You’re a control freak,” he says with a grin. 

Luke watches you play with the pendant on your necklace, the dragon scale he fashioned into your favorite accessory glinting in your hand. Running your fingers back and forth over the smooth surface, your other hand puts the spoon down and you place your head on his shoulder. He thinks if he had to describe the four-letter word on the tip of his tongue, he’d tell whoever’s asking about the way you kissed his healing cheek after you both left the Garden of Hesperides. More than a year later, Luke is still unable to find the right words even if the weakness has made a home in his heart with your name written all over it.

“I swear if I have to hear another person croak out a lovesong I might just drown myself in the Long Island Sound,” you scoff as his fingers trace circles onto your waist.

There’s a low strum of a guitar that reaches your ears and your forehead meets the cool surface of the table as you shut your eyes and grumble. It’s Lee and his half-siblings, beginning to walk through the hall seconds away from singing until they see Luke shaking his head and dragging his finger across his throat to please, gods, stop. The Apollo kids swivel and 180, walking out of the hall as the music stops dissonantly, rolling their eyes and dragging their feet.

“That was quick,” you say inquisitively as your head pops up from the table to see Luke looking off in the distance.

“Heh…I think they were just practicing or something…”

He then had to run off and pay them more drachmas for the inconvenience. 

Fucking hustlers.

—

The sun sets quickly on Camp Half-Blood since it’s mid-February, and Luke finds you trying to calm your nerves as you look at the mess of glitter and paper mache that covers the arts and crafts hall from floor to ceiling.

“I can’t believe this!” you say in disbelief as you look at Luke, and he takes the can of Redbull out of your shaking hand.  

“There’s just no fucking way everyone decided to use glitter. It’s everywhere! I’m—CONNOR, PUT THE SCISSORS DOWN!”

Luke sighs as he holds his hand out for his younger brother to give up the craft scissors, which he relinquishes with a mischievous grin. 

“Guys, go find trouble somewhere else,” Luke mutters, pushing his head away, and where Connor goes, Travis quickly follows, tossing a canister of glitter back at him and not knowing it was still open.

“Oops.” 

Immediately, the both of you are showered in iridescent particles, floating over your heads and stuck in your hair as the older Stoll brother looks at the two of you wide-eyed.

“You've already got trouble anyway,” he says teasingly, and this asshole winks at Luke before bolting out the door.

The room is silent now, and you pinch the bridge of your nose, before speaking, “I don’t care if he’s your brother, Luke. I might just fucking kill him.” You'd say more but your eyes are shut as you try not to breathe in glitter, and then the sound of the doorknob rattling catches your attention. Luke is standing there, finally faced with a door he can’t open, his eyebrows furrowed in annoyance–but the effect isn’t as menacing as it should be when he’s covered in red and pink sparkles.

“Not if I get to him first, the little bastard.”

“Just open the door,” you say panicked, running over and forcing his hands off the doorknob.

“I can’t if you won’t let me do it!” He grits, elbowing you and trying to unlock the door with both his inherited gift and brute strength.

“What kind of demigod even are you? Lockpicking is supposed to be your thing!”

“Well OBVIOUSLY, but it’s not working, now is it, trouble?”

Luke finishes off the rest of your energy drink before throwing the can over his shoulder and he swears he can hear you cuss at him under your breath as you berate him about the mess, so he chooses to focus on busting the door down instead of looking at the glitter stuck in your eyelashes and thinking about how the idea of being stuck in a room with you makes him feel weak at the knees. Through the window, his eyes meet the group of Apollo kids staring at the predicament you two are in (and the barricade of chairs the Stoll brothers put in front of the door). He sighs, and Lee’s little sister flips him off as they start to walk away again, instruments in tow.

“You gonna charge him again?”

A tiny Will Solace looks at his elders for guidance as they walk along the path. As one of the youngest in the bunch, he especially idolizes anything his half-siblings do, going along with whatever they see fit.

“No, but we’re close enough to the archery range that I might just shoot them through their hearts myself. Eros and Aphrodite themselves are pretty much begging us to,” Lee grumbles.

“Why are we doing this again?” Will babbles, and his half-sister grabs his hand to help him walk faster.

“A crazy little thing called love. You’ll understand it better someday, kid.”

—

Thankfully, it all starts winding down after dinner. Luke finds you leaning against a tree flipping through your clipboard during the camp sing-along, so he tugs at your elbow to get your attention.

“Wanna get out of here?”

You look at him, slotting your pen behind your ear as you notice faint glitter particles still dotted along his cheeks. As your lips pull into a small smile, you say, "I still have a few things to do after this, don't you?"

"Cleared your schedule for the night," he mumbles, and whether it's the glow of the bonfire or he's actually blushing, a teasing expression crosses your face as you step closer and cross your arms at him.

"You cleared my schedule for the night. How on earth did you do that?"

Instead of a proper reply, he grabs your hand, tugging you out to the docks near the lake.

"Don't worry about it."

He's not going to tell you that he owes Chris and Annie a few favors before the end of the month to make up for the night shift they ended up taking. Instead, you both sit cross-legged at the edge of the dock, a gentle breeze brushing at your clothes and for the first time today, you're able to just exist.

"I hate Valentine's Day," you suddenly say, looking up at the night sky, and he's watching you closely as the gentle shine of the moon casts a cool glow on your face. Luke cringes at your statement, thinking he's already thrown away his shot.

"Why's that?"

"Tell me something Luke, am I unlikable? Like, is there anything wrong with me?"

He looks at you like you've told him you’re secretly a cyclops.

“The fuck? How many times do I have to tell you that everyone thinks you’re great?"

You don't even give him a chance to finish his sentence before you blurt, "I don’t want to be great, I want to be loved!" Reeling back a little, you lean back on your hands to create some distance.

 “Sorry... that was a lot, and I’m just...wanting to be noticed. It's nice to have people's attention sometimes, you know?”

You’ve got all of mine, he thinks, realizing he never stood a chance at fighting it—this four-letter feeling you give him is the first and only battle he’ll back down from, and you're the only person he’ll wholeheartedly surrender to.

In short, he’s fucked.

"I always notice you." He pulls out a dented box of chocolates from his jacket pocket, opening it up for the both of you to share, and the look of amusement on your face makes him glad that at least one thing somewhat went to plan today, even if the chocolate truffles are a bit smushed. You’re popping one into your mouth and his dark eyes follow the trail of your fingers to your mouth, feeling his heart beat a bit faster.

But then you both hear the soft strum of a guitar from near the trees, and the two of you turn to hear some of the Apollo kids singing beautifully along the coastline.

I'll be seeing you, in all the old, familiar places...That this heart of mine embraces...

You gasp, grabbing Luke’s arm to push yourself up so that the both of you can turn and face a small group of your closest Apollo friends singing to the both of you. Luke’s eyes soften further when he feels you grab his hand and squeeze, leaning against his shoulder as you listen.

“Did you do this?” you mumble, still entranced by the performance.

“Only if it makes you laugh.”

And you do, in the way that he loves—a bit crazy and too loud, and it’s perfect.

I’ll always think of you that way…I’ll find you in the morning sun….

Whether it’s fireflies or Will bouncing light off the water to look like small, glowing candles, Luke can’t tell—he’s too busy watching your lips pull into a smile so confectionery his sweet tooth starts to ache. The little kid was never good at archery like his other half-siblings, but as your eyes shimmer under the ambient lights, you think his added romantic gesture shot you straight through the heart.

“You know, sometimes I really do hate you, Luke Castellan,” you whisper, and it couldn’t be more far from the truth.

“No, you don’t.”

His eyes flicker to you again, but you’re already looking back at him.

“I don’t.”

And when the night is new, I’ll be looking at the moon…but I’ll be seeing you…

It’s quiet now, and you’re unsure of where the Apollonian ensemble disappeared to but instead of worrying about if they’ll make it back before curfew, you stand there in front of Luke with your guard down.

Getting a little closer than he expected, your noses brush before you pull the slightly crushed wildflowers from your jean pocket, the only physical reminder you’ve kept from today, and tuck them into his jacket pocket, sitting right above his heart. 

“Thank you.”

Luke doesn’t realize he’s holding his breath until he feels your lips gently kiss the marred skin on his right cheek, the blemish having an uncanny resemblance to a stroke of lightning; it serves as a reminder of his weakness. The lines blur as his eyes close to savor it and he doesn’t know if weakness is your kisses or his scar—but he is vulnerable to it all the same, realizing there’s a crack in the otherwise perfect persona that he’s worked so hard on. When his eyes open again, his Achilles’ heel has taken human form.

—

“This has got to be cheating,” Clarisse grumbles as she watches from the distance, hidden behind the trees.

“It’s not cheating if I’m winning. Silena’s gonna get a kick out of this,” Lee chuckles, ushering everyone back towards the cabins. It’s a bit harder to do this in the dark as they try to be quiet and not interrupt whatever will happen next between their favorite counselors.

“Well lucky for you, your gifts are cute and romantic, what am I supposed to do? They fight enough!”

“That’s what got them into this mess in the first place. Come on, curfew’s in 10. We’ll find out which of us wins the bet soon enough,” Chris mutters, pushing them along back onto the main path.

“Easy for you to say, Rodriguez, you live with Luke!”

“Would I ever lie to you, La Rue?” he says with a mischievous grin, and the Apollo kids giggle at the irony.

—

“My body ages,

my anger burns into a seam.

I am so annoyed by love

and still it comes.”

-Kate Baer

ask to be added to luke/general taglists!

luke taglist (some won't let me tag, turn on my post notifs?): @kissingyourgrl @dorcas4meadowes @lorarri @andrewgarfldsgf @noodlesketchbook @10ava01 @poppysrin @ashisabitgay @timhalamet @liv1104 @leeknows-wife @mxtokko @bugcuti3 @luvvfromme @midmourn @2hiigh2cry @yuminako @niktwazny303 @lukecastellandefender @intergalactic-padawan @iliketopgun @annybah @dangelnleif @thegrinningghost @alyssajunelle @obxstiles @m00ng4z3r @visndcaitswhore @b0ok-lover @elegant-face-tree @this-barbie-is-having-breakdowns @amortencjja @idonevenknow1359 @maliaaaa @targaryenluvs @sakyira @dhdjdjjdhsjdiri @number-onekidqueen @bradynoonswife @stevenknightmarc @hoodedhavok @happy-mushrooms @homebyeleven @anotherblackreader @too-deviant @liviessun @lilacspider @theadventuresofanartist @sucker4seresin @simpforsunwoo @zanzie @starrystormwritings

[sarahsmi13s]

Duckie Universe

I DO NOT CONSENT TO ANY OF MY WORK BEING COPIED OR TRANSLATED

this is the masterlist for the ‘Duckie’ universe! here you can follow Duckie’s journey!

pairing: bradley ‘rooster’ bradshaw x twin!reader, eventual jake ‘hangman’ seresin x bradshaw!reader

series summary: daughter of goose and carole and twin sister to bradley ‘rooster’ bradshaw, y/n bradshaw also got her papers pulled when she tried to enlist in the Navy. which turned out to not be as bad as she thought.

Story

Chapter 1

mav has pulled the twins papers. bradley is set out to prove something, while y/n takes it as an opportunity to do a reality check and see what other options she has

Chapter 2

when y/n and kendall go to visit bradley in california before he goes to flight school, they’ve got a big birthday surprise for him ;)

Chapter 3

one persons reckless decision turns duckie’s life upside down

Chapter 4

duckie has lost her love before their baby has even been born. but she isn’t alone. and she has a valentine’s day that she’ll never forget

Chapter 5

lil nick is now one! but it brings a lot of the feelings to the surface for duckie.

Chapter 6

duckie tries to start dating as the anniversary of kendall’s death reaches 3 years, but is she ready? and can bradley make her come to her senses about her latest boyfriend before it’s too late?

Chapter 7

it’s duckie and bradley’s birthday! you know what that means... she has kept her promise of no dating until her and brad were 26. and as she celebrates her birthday at the hard deck, she catches the green eyes of one blond aviator.

Chapter 8

jake has spent weeks trying to get to know nick and duckie, hoping to show her that he was willing to be there for both of them. duckie can see that and she wants to face her fears and dip her toe in the water. so during a morning at the beach that jake stumbled upon, she asks him to go to a farmer’s market with her

Chapter 9

a week after duckie and jake went on their "not-date" she is seriously regretting not getting jake's number before he left -- considering they haven't seen each other since. though, as fate would have it, that weekend they see each other at the beach and as duckie is walking away jake gets a push from his friends to get her number. little does he know he'll be getting much more than that from her

backstory

Last in the Flock

in the wake of carole's diagnosis, bradley gets into an accident, duckie's thoughts run wild and take over

if you would liked to be tagged in this series, please comment or reblog here!! it’ll just help me to keep up with everyone to have a central hub for tags

tags <33: @roosterscockpit @luckyladycreator2 @hotch-meeeeeuppppp @hisredheadedgoddess28 @malindacath @bananas1234 @avengers-fixation @shawnsblue​

love all you ducklings <33​

[actualbabe]

i was. womdering if you had more schnick content. perhaps a. fic. or an except of a fic.

please help i just discovered there is indeed a tiny little fanbase for these two and i am DESPERATE for contents

hi there! i am on a permanent hiatus of writing fanfic. i have a handful of schmidt/nick and/or gay new girl ideas that are mostly just digital scribbles in random google docs, but i'm afraid they'll be sealed away as i enjoy my fanfic retirement

that said, here's a lil something from the vault :)

Happy Pride!

---

“Oh, I can come back,” Nick offers, already taking a step back towards the door.

“What? No!” Jess protests, waving him forward towards the bed even as Cece groans in dismay. “How'd I get so lucky? My bro and my hoe!”

Nick hadn't meant to walk in on them together, Cece just happens to be an ever-present presence at the loft ever since she and Jess finally sealed the deal. They've been practically attached at the hip ever since Valentine's day, with Schmidt rapidly fluctuating from making douchey comments attempting to insert himself into their sex life, dismay over his lost shot with Cece (however improbable), irritation over the mounting threat of female domination of the loft, and wise cracks about the logistics of a dual-bang relationship. Winston rapidly went through the five stages of grief upon discovery of their secret relationship, that is if those stages were Shock, Arousal, Anger, Bargaining, and Acceptance. (This was also conflated with finding the two of them semi-nude in the back of his car following a multi-hour musical sing-a-long, so perhaps he wasn't in the best place for such a revelation).

Nick knew before it even had officially begun, thanks to a drunken heart-to-heart slash dual-coming-out on the bathroom floor circa 5am on New Year's Day. He'd been a pretty pathetic sight, a jumbled mix of gay denial and reeling over the discovery that he was hopelessly in love with his best friend after watching said best friend makeout with some random dude who must be a horrible, terrible, no good, awful guy, even though Nick doesn't know a thing about him. Jess just wanted to pee, but she's always been quick to comfort people when they're mid-crisis. She's a good person like that. To date she is also significantly more successful at navigating and acting on best friend romance.

Hence his arrival. He stands before the lesbian council of Jess and Cece, pointedly staring away from any potential errogenous zones currently covered by layers of bedding.

“Have you told him that you’re gay?” Jess asks, her hands folded over her stomach and on top of the comforter delicately tucked around her midsection. Cece, looking terribly inconvenienced, flops back into the pile of pillows beside her girlfriend.

“Psh, yeah,” Nick scoffs, crossing his arms over his chest and pulling a face. “I’ll just tell Schmidt I’m gay. Yeah, right.” 

Jess looks puzzled. “Um, exactly?”

Nick sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose. “Jess, come on. I need some kind of plan here. A scheme.” He looks up at the ceiling, rubbing at his chin in thought. “Maybe I’ll get a skywriter. No, too expensive. Oh! I’ll write it on a little piece of paper, and then I’ll tie that to a bird’s leg, and then I’ll send the brid through his window-”

“You’re making this way too complicated,” Cece says, cutting off his rather brilliant brainstorming process. “Just tell him that you like him.”

“That I like him?” Nick scoffs. “What is this, Middle School?”

“Fine.” Cece rolls her eyes. “Tell him you want to suck his dick.”

Both he and Jess reel back in mild disgust at Cece's statement. Yeah, he does technically want that, wants it maybe a little bit too much, but that doesn’t mean he wants to hear it out loud. Or stated so plainly by Cece, who is still very much undressed (albeit tucked carefully and strategically beneath the floral blanket) and lying in Jess’ bed. 

“And you say that I’m the immature one.” Cece rolls her eyes again. “Honestly, you’re only making this harder on yourself. Just tell him.”

“I have.”

Jess gives him a knowing look.

“Okay, I haven’t told him. But he knows. I know he knows.” 

Jess and Cece glance at each other skeptically, doing that weird thing where they communicate via telepathy and minute twitches of their eyes.

“Look, it’s a guy thing, okay? You wouldn’t get it.”

Cece looks up at the ceiling, fully unimpressed and looking rather fed up with this conversation. “You know what? I’m okay with that.”

“Just use your words, Nick.” Jess smiles encouragingly at him. 

Nick lets out a sigh.

“Now if you’ll excuse me,” Cece says, shifting back towards Jess to press her lips to the corner of her jaw as the comforter begins to slip dangerously down the length of her bare shoulder. “I have some very pressing business to attend to with my girlfriend.”

Jess giggles and Nick suppresses his gag reflex. “You two are disgusting, I hope you know that.”

“Duly noted,” Cece comments, her head traveling lower down the slope of Jess’ neck.

“But what about me?” he protests, still feeling entirely unresolved.

“Goodbye, Nick,” Jess reiterates, shooing him out the door as she tilts her head back to give Cece better access to her throat.

---

The following afternoon while Nick’s shaving, he develops and finalizes his plan of attack. The next time that Schmidt goes to Fredo-kiss him, he’s going to grab onto either side of his face and haul him into it. Just like that. Easy. Simple. Most importantly: no words needed.

Nick Miller is a man of many talents: zombie novel author, expert handyman, thrifty consumer. That said, being good at feelings is not exactly one of his strong suits. He has grown to accept this for himself after a lot of personal growth and self reflection. Mostly resignation. Almost entirely resignation.

He scrapes the razor over the last patch of skin on his jaw before rinsing it in the sink. He leans over to splash water over his freshly-shaven jaw to wash off the remains of shaving cream from his face before standing up to look himself in the mirror, nodding resolutely at his reflection. It’s a foolproof plan. 

---

Or at least, it would have been a foolproof plan. 

Instead, after years of blatantly ignoring Nick numerous pleas, Schmidt seems to have suddenly decided to stop Fredo-kissing him entirely. It is, quite frankly, absolutely ridiculous. After weeks of frustration go by without even the slightest peck to the cheek, Nick feels like he might just lose his mind. Nick goes to extreme lengths in an attempt to solicit such attempts from Schmidt, all without success. He even stoops so low as to compliment Schmidt’s choice of wardrobe, which just draws an raised eyebrow of amusement from Jess and a look of bewildered confusion from Winston, but Schmidt just shakes it off and accuses Nick of trying to poke fun at his expense, which under any other circumstance would be the correct answer, and Nick storms away to his room to mull over yet another failed attempt.

Dammit, how hard is it to get someone to kiss you?

Nick’s in the middle of his ongoing internal strife over the whole situation when things go topsy-turvy in the form of Jess tackling him for no good reason during their pickup football game, leaving him writhing on the ground in agony while Schmidt stands over him in his stupidly tight leggings spouting absolute nonsense as Jess fusses over his prone body and Winston looks thoroughly amused about the whole situation. It is, frankly, entirely unfair. 

And then, to makes things even worse, Jess insists on hauling him off to see her lesbian lady doctor friend, where Nick is then unfairly subjected to further prodding of both his tender body and newfound sexual orientation, which are two blows to his manhood that he did not need on a Saturday morning, thank you very much. 

To cap off the whole experience, Jess’ lesbian doctor friend thinks he might have cancer, so that’s fucking fantastic. 

---

Like most things, Nick copes with his possible cancer diagnosis by getting unreasonably drunk. He does a lot of moping, still high on painkillers and a bit too crossfaded to be completely coherent and gets in an argument with Jess about funerals and doing worthwhile things in your life that ends with her getting upset and him feeling guilty and frustrated, a feeling that only doubles down when he glances across the bar and sees Schmidt talking to Cece.

Winston sings him a sad song and Schmidt attempts to rap and under normal circumstances both of these things would be subject to ridicule and/or douchebag jar-able offenses, but Nick is both drunk and sad enough to appreciate the attempts to cheer him up and honor his memory. Cece tops them all with an actual rap like something right out of a Fruity Pebbles commercial, earning applause from the three guys and a slightly-sloppy kiss from Jess. 

---

Flash forward several hours and an ill-fated attempt to splash in the ocean later, and they're at the beach, Jess and Cece huddled close together beneath their coats and Winston passed out in the backseat of his piece of shit car. Nick sits further out from them and stares out at the waves, mulling over his thoughts when Schmidt appears at his side.

“This seat taken?”

“All yours.”

For a few minutes there’s nothing but the sound of the waves crashing on the shore. It feels appropriately moody, and although Nick’s a little pissed at Jess for convincing him to run into the freezing water buck-ass naked, he does appreciate her choice of scenery for his cinematic moment.

“You know what I’m thinking about?”

“What, Schmitty?”

“That now I've finally gotten to see your manhood, even if it was too cold out to showcase its full glory.”

“I can’t believe you.” Nick shoves at his shoulder in annoyed disbelief, and Schmidt sways at the contact. “That’s what you're thinking about now? I’m your best friend, and I’m fucking going through something here, man-”

“I know, I know.” Schmidt shakes his head in mock shame, still staring out at the distant ocean, and Nick resists the urge to smack him upside the head or tackle him to the ground to rub his face in the sand. Of all the ways for Schmidt to see his penis for the first time, even with all that ridiculousness of Jess and his weird obsession over the strength of their friendship. After everything that has happened since then it almost feels like ages ago.

“Then why would you say that?”

“I don't know why.”

“Why would anyone say that?”

Schmidt shrugs. He turns back to look at Nick again. There’s something complicated hidden in the shadows of his eyes, and it makes that awful feeling in Nick’s chest well up and multiply. Nick can feel the words he’s been trying to say for months, hell, years, sticking in his throat, just beneath the ticking time bomb in his neck. He opens his mouth to say something, only to shut it a few seconds afterwards when nothing comes out. Another wave crashes over the sand, flowing up over the shore and leaving the ghost of white sea foam in its wake before it's soaked down into the wet sand. 

Staring out over the reflection of the moon on the water, Nick thinks about what Jess said, about not doing things and about regret. He thinks about how brave she is, about the way she looks at Cece and how it lights up her whole face. He thinks about his future if he really does have cancer: about lying in a hospital bed in Chicago far away from his friends, and how his whole body would ache with the longing to be with them one last time before he kicked the bucket. He thinks about his ma crying at his funeral, about his dad trying to pull a slip-and-fall scam at the funeral home, about Jamie telling his future kids about their Uncle Nicky who they never got to meet.

He thinks about Schmidt, about leaving him behind without being brave enough to finally put the words to what he feels for him. He thinks about how selfish his own love is, about how he hates to put himself on the line and how he takes and takes and takes from people like Schmidt and like Jess who only know how to give. He thinks about how he doesn’t deserve the love that Schmidt gives him, and about how Schmidt keeps handing it to him on a silver platter anyways.

Schmidt is still silently watching the water. The evening sea breeze has ruffled his hair slightly, and there’s a stray curl that falls over his forehead, pulled out of place with a casualness that feels as though Schmidt may have planned for it to happen just so. There’s a shade of stubble on his jaw, a barely-there shadow that’s only really visible because Schmidt’s skin is so pale and his hair is so dark in contrast. His lower lip is slightly swollen from him nervously worrying it all night, and Nick so desperately wants to bite into it with his own teeth.

“Hey, Schmitty?”

His head turns on a swivel. “Yeah?” 

Schmidt’s dark eyes meet Nick’s own, swimming with the same fear that Nick feels building in his own chest. Nick takes a resolute breath.

“I fucking love you, man.”

He smiles, and oh god that’s fucking pity in his eyes, isn’t it? “I love you too, man.”

“No.” Nick shakes his head, feels his hands tremble. “I mean it.”

His expression twists, and Schmidt ducks his head slightly to break their eye contact. “Nick-” 

“Oh, for the love of-”

Without any further waffling, Nick throws his hand around the back of Schmidt’s neck and hauls him in for a kiss, mashing their mouths together before he has a chance to realize how deeply fucking stupid he is.

After a few seconds, just long enough for Nick to reconsider his every decision over the past three months and also be halfway thankful that he’s dying because then at least he won’t have to live with the consequences of this moment, Schmidt’s hand brushes up against his cheek, and Schmidt tilts his head slightly, parting his lips enough to turn the kiss from middle-school awkwardness into something real, and it sends a fucking shockwave through Nick’s whole system. Nick greedily returns the kiss, tightens his grip on the collar of Schmidt’s shirt and presses himself forward, chasing the foreign-familar feel of Schmidt’s lips on his own.

They hold the kiss until it becomes awkward again, after which Schmdit pulls away to take a shuddering breath. Nick lets him go, but maintains the touch of his hand on Schmidt’s broad shoulder, trying to keep himself grounded. Schmidt blinks once, then twice, then a third time before looking at Nick’s face. His gaze darts back and forth between his lips and his eyes with a perplexed look, trying to puzzle out what just happened.

“‘M gay,” Nick mutters, suddenly feeling extremely self-aware of his own stupidity. 

Schmidt lets out an exhale that might be the ghost of a laugh. “Okay.”

Nick nods resolutely. Then he leans in again, and the genuine press of Schmidt’s lips to his own is starting to become familiar, which sends a whole new thrill through him, especially when Schmidt wraps one of his arms around his neck, pulling him closer as he opens his mouth against Nick’s, deepening the kiss into something dizzying while Nick just falls into it, no longer attempting to keep his wits about him. He lets himself get lost in it, in the feel of Schmidt’s heartbeat against his own and the assured way Schmidt kisses, half confidence and half practice, and he could fucking get used to this.

“So,” Schmidt finally says when they pull apart. His voice is rough and his lips are kiss-swollen, and Nick doesn’t hold back his impulse to rub his thumb over Schmidt’s lower lip. “You love me.”

Nick laughs a little, suddenly nervous. “Yeah.” 

Schmdit grins. “I feel like I’ve been telling you that I love you for years.”

“I mean, me too.” Nick shrugs. “In my own way.”

Impossibly, Schmidt’s grin widens even further. “Yeah.” He ducks his head, blushing. “I know.”

---

Nick doesn’t have cancer. The doctor tells him a lot of other things that he should probably be listening to, but all that Nick hears is that he doesn’t have cancer, and it bounces around in his head until it crashes into the fact that Schmdit loves him.

He tells them the good news and Schmidt kisses him again, and Nick lets him until Winston makes a wolf-whistle, prompting Nick to shove Schmidt off, dimly aware that the look of overwhelming relief and joy on Schmidt’s face mirrors his own. Jess just laughs and Cece rolls her eyes fondly, and Nick scratches nervously at the back of his neck, sheepishly staring down at his boots.

On the walk home Nick holds Schmidt’s hand, and the intimacy of it overwhelms him. It strikes Nick as funny, because they’ve done far more serious things, hell, roughly six hours ago he’d felt up the hard line of Schmidt’s dick in his jeans while kissing him, with tongue and everything. But despite it all, he can’t help the heat that rises to his face at the simple contact of Schmidt’s fingers threaded through his own.

Out of the corner of his eye, he sees that Schmidt is grinning at him, looking like a kid on Christmas.

It’s nice.

[samstclair]

Johnny Knoxville’s Valentine, Hasan Piker’s Beyblade

Johnny Knoxville X Reader

Anonymous Request - "Hi! Love your stuff so far! So this might be a little specific, but I know you'll make it work, Sam!

Okay, Y/N is an interviewer for the Jackass Forever premiere, but she's late, and Johnny finds her after and asks her to be his Valentine. Also maybe some history with Hasan Piker? Maybe she used to be Y/N's ex? You do the magic! Thanks a bunch!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

February 14th, 5:07 am Your eyes opened to the sun peering through your shades. You stretched, a big stretch, your bones cracking abnormally.

"Man, I should see a chiro today," you thought.

But then it hit you - it's today. Today was the day. Today had been just that - the day. It's the day. It was finally here, and no matter how much you dreaded it - there was nothing you could do.

"One more, oh, just one more and that's it! You're done. Through. No more of this corporate capitalism bullshit!"

Hasan taught you well. You smile just thinking of him, his thumbs. You missed him. After that night, it's been weird - the feeling of someone you were so used to, so closed to- just gone. You remember it like it happened only the night before.....

You and Hasan, your boyfriend of almost a year, lying down on your couch watching Zootopia. You loved that movie, maybe too much. He thought you had a "genuine problem", as he would call it, with your obsession to the animated furry film.

But, more specifically, Nick Wilde.

"It's not normal! He's a fox, dude," he would say. But you knew better. He was more than that. He's Jason. Jason Bateman.

Anyway, the scene came on with the main character, Judy, putting on her little police uniform. You loved this part, she looks so happy. You saw a little of of her happiness in, well, you.

"She looks so cute in her costume," you exclaimed, chomping on your soggy McDonalds fries, "she'd be a cute little officer. Just like Lil Wayne's song. Don't you think? -"

And just like that - you didn't even recognize him.

"You think she's cute? A cop? A bunny cop? That's much, dude. Actually, that's fucking disgusting," he rose, livid, his 6'7" body shadowing over you.

"Is this how Judy sees the world?" you thought. "Is this how she sees Nick? Sees Jason?"

"I can't believe you'd say that," he continued.

At this point, you paused, in shock - it was only a bunny, after all. You pressed pause on the remote, the movies gonna have to wait.

"Babe, calm down," you tried, mouth full of those soggy McDonalds fries, "It's just a Disney movie. You know, Walt Disney? I don't love cops, just like you I hate them, but I just think-"

And in the blink of an eye, he pimp-slapped the dangling fries from your mouth, so hard they broke through the window, like shrapnel. You couldn't believe it - he hit you.

Well, not you, just those dangling soggy fries. He couldn't understand you with a mouth full of soggy fries that were dangling. Or maybe he hated McDonalds?

You were so stunned, you couldn't move.

"He hit me..." you thought. "Well, not me, but the fries."

He continued "You're a bootlicker! That's why you like to be called 'bunker slut'? Huh? Tell me!"

His 6'10" body still towered over you. You had to admit, you found it kinda hot, but he surely didn't. In fact, he was outraged.

He grabbed your face and spat, "You're just a bunker slut who likes cops - bunny cops. You support the conglomerate that is Disney, who attempts to push the narrative of not all cops being bad to children. You know I hate that narrative - don't you even watch my streams?! My eight hour streams?!"

He was in your face now, his breathe reeking of the soda he always drinks. Maybe diet Mountain Dew?

You felt horrible, but felt butterflies in your stomach - you had to admit, again, it was kinda hot. But not now, not now!

"That's it! I can't even look at you, dude! You're disgusting! You're vile!"

And then, when you think it couldn't have gone any worse - he brought you closer, his mouth to your ear, and whispered,

"Nick Wilde was almost pepper sprayed by that cute bunny you like - he could've been a victim."

You were then launched out the window by your hair, and the last thing you heard come out from your boyfriend's mouth as he threw you was

"Beyblade - let it rip".

Then, it all went BLACK...

But never mind that. Today is the day. The Jackass Forever premiere. It was a new day, new you. A different you, perhaps. Though same apartment, same broken window you never fixed, it's all a fresh start.

"I'm not a negative Nancy, and I am not a Debby downer! I'm just, well....I'm just Linda Litzke!"

You rose from your bed, put on your robe and went into your kitchen to begin breakfast. The sky looked beautiful through the window, flies and other bugs crawling through the opening in the glass, eating the leftover $5 wednesday sushi from last night. Though there were no Publixes on the west coast, and certainly not Los Angeles, you made it a point to fly over back home to Miami every Wednesday, because $5 Wednesday sushi is just too good of a deal to pass, after all. Not your fault inflation exists.

Hasan taught you what that word meant too....

"Oh well, I'll clean it later", you said, snapping back into reality.

The smell of coffee lifted up your spirits even more as it brewed, and once it finished, you reached over, poured a glass and had you white mother moment - hugging yourself in your robe with the cup of coffee being sipped in your hand, looking out sunny Los Angeles. The land of opportunity.

You started to reminisce on that one t-shirt you used to have. In big, block letters it spelled -

ALL I NEED IS... COFFEE✔️ WIFI✔️ MY BED✔️

Oh, you missed that shirt.

Then, your phone call buzzed you out of your trance. it scared you so much in fact, you threw your coffee out the window.

"Again?!" You yelled. First the fries, then you, and now the 10 dollar Starbucks coffee from the Starbucks bean bag from Starbucks?

Rummaging through your couch, threw bits of crumbs and dusty hair ties - you got the phone. It was your boss.

"Awe, he's wishing me good luck!" You thought. Oh, how you were wrong.

"Y/N! Where the FUCK ARE YOU?!" He screamed.

"Omg hey, I just woke up? Why? What's up?" You smiled. He sounded pumped to hear from you.

"What do you mean you just woke up you fucking moron?! It's fucking five in the afternoon! Your stupid bone-cracking ass was supposed to be here two hours ago! I've been calling since 3! The premiere's starting in twenty fucking minutes! This is why Andrew fucking Tate is the motherfucking goat! W Tate! Cause women can't function outside of their kitchen!" And just like that, he hung up.

Your heart fell - everything slowed. Taking a double check to the clock - it wasn't 5 am, it really was 5 pm.

Like taking a hit of methanphetamine, you bolted. You put your hair in a messy bun, threw on your Forever 21 dress that you got at H&M, and bolted out the door.

You cursed yourself, you didn't have a car, so you just began to do what you know best - run.

You ran, as fast as you can run, the faster you ever ran, you ran. One thing the DMV can't deny, you didn't need a learners permit to run.

Passing through the crowded streets, running in front of oncoming traffic - you just ran. The sun beamed down harshly,

"Man fuck LA" you thought.

And then you saw it - the Chinese Theater - you pushed through and through the crowd, you went under the VIP belt looking desperately for your boss. All the commotion and body heat made you feel claustrophobic. You felt everything close in, your breathe tighten. Where was your boss? Where are your co-workers? And most importantly - where are my shoes?

You look down at your patas, and that would've been enough to take you out. The were dirty from all the running when you were running. Two words came in mind.

Dirty. Dogs.

"Those dogs....theyre.... dirty," you whip around and your eyes needed a moment to adjust - but you couldn't believe it. You've seen him everywhere, all the time, you just couldn't believe it was him. You breathe shortened even more, no, it can't be! You hear his raspy, southern voice all the time, but now, you realize, he's right in front of you. His silver fox hair stood up so straight like he got electrocuted, as if it were for some stunt he was so familiar with. His big glasses sat at the top of his nose.

It's your boss.

He grabs you by your messy bun and yells in your face, in a voice resembling Chucky.

"NO. MESSY. BUNS!"

He picks you up and begins swinging you like a helicopter - round and round. And just like Hasan, he whispers

"let it rip"

and swings you against the wall. The air lets out, and you're dizzy. He threw you ways away. You open your eyes, but instead of soggy McDonalds French fries on the parking lot floor beside you... it's a lot softer.

Its a red carpet.

THE red carpet.

It's silent. Your bones hurt. That Chiro. You needed him.

Suddenly, you see a hand come towards you. Who ever it is, they ask

"are you okay, pudding?"

Like when a veteran hearing sirens, your eyes flutter wide open. The silver.....its so familiar. The glasses....

"Hey, are you okay? That was one gnarly stunt you just did!"

Then, you hear who you swear is Whoopi Goldberg (its Steve o ).

"Get her up, she's bleeding she's hurt."

You rise and again - everything went BLACK.

Your eyes flutter open again, this time, no sun peering through the curtains. Instead your inside someone's house.

"Hey, sweetheart. How you feeling?"

You turn over and again...the silver the glasses oh my god is Philip Clapp. You jump up, embarrassed.

"Oh my god, what happened?"

He tries to calm you down, "Hey hey hey, its okay. Relax" Now you feel relaxed.

"Oh my god, the premiere!"

"Don't worry about that! Its all over youre safe."

"Thanks Johnny, honestly. Is this your home?"

He looks around trying to be modest, but he kinda starts to drift off. This must be that CTE you've been hearing all about.

"Hello, Johnny?" You snap in his face. He comes back .

"Yeah yeah sorry, yeah its my house. Say, do you have a valentine's?"

You feel your rosacea arise in your cheeks.

"No, no why do you ask?"

"Well because, I wanted to know, if you would be my valentine? Its February 14th."

"Oh my god, well, yeah of course!" You jump up to hug him, he hugs tightly back, he then throws you on the bed and you feel his member pressed against your leg. He begins kissing you, his tongue licking your lips for entrance. You let him in. Your tongues fight for dominance but you let him win. He eventually starts going down on you, taking your forever 21 dress that you got at H&M off, and starts kissing your labia.

"This...this is a labia" he says.

You lift your legs as he begins to eat you out, his wet breathe on your cooter. He holds your foot up and raises himself, ready to press his member intro your entrance. Your eyes are closed, ready to take the boy from Tennessee in. This is it. No boss, no Hasan, no job, nothing - just you and Philip.

"Your...dogs"

"Sorry?" You say "I have no dogs-"

"Your - DOGS" he flings your leg away like its radioactive and it's Chernobyl.

You look at your dogs - theyre dirty - still dirty from all the running in LA. "Your dogs...theyre infected...."

"No Johnny, wait, please I was late to the premiere and I had to run -"

He raises and adjusts himself.

"Im sorry Y/N, I don't wanna be a negative Nancy or Debby downer but - I can't be with a broad with LA sidewalk feet. It's just not good for my public image. Im number one on WikiFeet. How am I gonna be number one with a girl with-" he gulped " those feet".

"Johnny! Please wait! I just need a little pedicure please - "

"I'm sorry. I can no longer be your valentine."

He gets his phone and dials a number while fixing his pants. He spits on the floor. At first you thought it was chewing tabacco, because he's from the south, but upon closer inspection it was shards of McDonalds fries and rice from the sushi earlier. You forgot, your rare disease (Klein's, as unofficially diagnosed by your Canadian bff Nathan Fielder) makes you shit out of your vagina instead of your ass

"You should've told him", you thought.

"Yeah hi, is Jason there? Yeah I need to speak to him. Yeah, okay. Yeah ill wait a sec. Oh hey Jason, you wanna be my valentine? Oh that's great! Yes, ill be there now! How's Nobu? Yes! Im stepping out the door as we speak" Johnny runs out of your room, like a bomb just dropped behind him. You being the bomb.

You scream, "but Johnny - we'll have breakfast! Ill make you breakfast! Like pancakes, eggs and bacon-"

Then, boom.

The house blows up. Bacon. Bacon was the last thing you ever spoke to Johnny, the last thing you ever said, period, as he ran out to Nobu to meet Jason Bateman for his Valentine's date.

Hope you enjoyed! xoxo, ~Sam St. Clair

[bluemojave]

W.I.P Wednesday (but super super late)

i was tagged aaaaages ago by my fantastic friends @adelaidedrubman @aceghosts @beautiful-delirium @derelictheretic to post works in progress (and last lines) and i’m finally actually writing again so i’ve got a lil smth new for y’all under the cut!!

also spoiler warning for an ending of Far Harbor in the first one even tho i know it’s been out forever just bc i only just played it myself lmao <3

To Nora - a small drabble-in-progress from the perspective of my W.I.P Fallout 4 oc

in the timeline of the game, this is right at the end of Far Harbor, with the main quest completed through Reunions and all of Nick’s associated quests done— so spoiler warning!!

I killed DiMA today.

Sure, not directly. I didn’t pull the trigger. But I told him to go. I said he had to tell Far Harbor, knowing what they’d do when they found out. And he did. And now he’s dead.

Nick hasn’t talked to me since it happened. It must’ve been a few hours by now, but he can’t seem to find it in him to leave his body out of eyesight on that dirty pier. At least Allen and the harbormen have the emotional intelligence to leave us alone, but I’m sure if Lee had it his way, he would’ve strung up that old synth on the barricade as a warning to the Fog. An eye for an eye, a life for a life— “nothing gets away with murder.” Though I’m not sure they ever thought synths were living in the first place.

So here I am, sitting in a rotting chair with a bottle of bourbon that tastes less like alcohol and more like gasoline, watching my best friend try and mourn the family he only just learned he had, all because of me. The air stinks, like it’s been tainted with the smell of rotted flesh consumed by the Fog and the Ocean from the people desperate enough to try to survive here.

DiMA was desperate too. But nature didn’t reclaim him. I did.

And now I don’t know why I ever wanted to in the first place. Is it because he told me I was a synth? Was it the realization that I’ve been walking around carrying another man’s face and life story on my shoulders like some stolen hand-me-down clothes? The fact that I couldn’t lie to myself any more about who I am, and what I’m not?

Was it because he forced that on other people too? Jules…the Captain…how are we supposed to live with ourselves when our entire existence was stripped away to just become an artificial copy of someone somebody else wanted us to be?

I made a mistake telling Jules. Not telling Avery is a mercy.

You know what’s kinda funny? I’ve been wearing Kellogg’s jacket since I killed him. There used to be a strange comfort in it, knowing that they were close to you when you died; knowing that the leather of these sleeves had held our baby; knowing that he couldn’t cause any more harm in it. But now it just feels dirty.

I am wearing the lives of two different men on my skin, and neither of them have ever truly been mine to take.

God, I feel nauseous.

It’s a sick kind of irony knowing that I could get revenge for losing you, but Valentine can’t. Or, he could— and hell, at this point I’d probably let him— but I know he never would.

I can’t sit here anymore. I’m taking a long walk and throwing this jacket off the goddamn pier.

I miss you. I love you.

And I’m sorry.

Apple — I’m re-writing the scene where Cain and Rei meet and having a rough time of it, but enjoy what i have so far :)

in which John is the whore we all know he is, and Jacob Seed gets cucked by an asexual lesbian and his younger brother LMAO

The good doctor found Deputy Cain Marshall with a cut across his hand in the back of a greenhouse, and she wasn’t sure whether to consider it luck or a curse.

Dr. Hawthorne was stationed here as a punishment from Father, that much they were sure of. The order that sent her away brought a redness to the eldest Seed’s face only matched by the fire that burned it— she could hear him yelling from half a mile away as the van escorted her out of the Whitetails. Figuring out what the punishment was for, however, seemed out of reach.

All of the other Seeds have had their…pets…from time to time. John practically had a harem of eager recruits circulating through his bed chambers, and Faith’s proclivity for flirtation had earned her many a notch in her belt in her time as the Seed’s beloved little sister. But somewhere along the line, Jacob made a mistake in choosing Rei, one that cost him his doctor and his dignity.

[nightingaelic]

POODLES IN THE WASTELAND

i jest I jest

But 👀

What about pets? Either ones companions would have or a very uncommon one that someone wouldn’t think was a good pet, BUT IS. Deathclaws you can ride like a pony, mole rats that want belly rubs, cazadore’s as cattier pigeons! What are your thoughts?

Or like, Danse or Piper or Fawkes with something hilarious Idek ignore me

Oooookay, here’s my comprehensive list of companions - ALL companions, across Fallouts 3, 4, New Vegas and 76 - and their (headcanon) choices in wasteland pets. I’ll give a little explanation for each - particularly as many of these companions are transients and don’t have the luxury of owning a home to keep pets at. Also, I feel like most of the companions, while they might not necessarily like pets, would be somewhat fond or at least respectful of the pets of the Lone Wanderer/Courier/Sole Survivor/Vault Dweller, like Dogmeat and Rex. 

Bighorners

Lily Bowen: Everyone’s favorite super mutant grandma is already an experienced shepherdess in Jacobstown, and she’s more than willing to tear some night stalkers apart to keep her herd safe. If that’s not love beyond the norm for wasteland livestock, I don’t know what is. She’s probably given all of her bighorners names after the characters in the television reruns she used to watch on holotape in Vault 17, like Grace and Audrey and Lucille. 

Brahmin

Raul Tejada: Actually spent a decent part of his pre-war life living on a ranch, so he knows that most brahmin don’t deserve being labeled “irritable” just because people don’t know how to read their body language. I think he’d follow wild brahmin herds around a bit on a whim and keep them from coming to any harm, especially the little ones. He gives them names like the cattle he grew up with, Corazon and Gordo and Blanca. 

Rose of Sharon Cassidy: Doesn’t truck with the wild herds, but she knows that part of the success of a caravan lies with how well they treat their pack animals. All of her caravan’s brahmin have names - Penny, Magic and Sprinkles - and she’s careful to pair them up with drivers who are patient and work well with their various personalities. 

Cats

Butch DeLoria: While Butch ultimately decided to leave Vault 101 behind, I don’t think he would ever truly lose his fear of radroaches after what they did to his mom. Having a little friend to warm his bunk in Rivet City and pounce on intruders would probably set his mind at ease, maybe a black tomcat with one ear named Pepper. He might even gift his mom a kitten when he next comes to visit. 

Star Paladin Cross: I don’t think Cross much sees the use of an animal that doesn’t contribute to the community it lives in, like most of the Brotherhood of Steel. Cats, however, are excellent at pest control, even if the rats are bigger nowadays. I think she’d give the resident cats at the Citadel some pets in passing, and she’d smile when she has to extract playful kittens from inside her power armor frame. She’s especially fond of the cat colony’s matriarch, a scarred old tabby named Gemma. 

Curie: Upon her transition into a synth body, Curie is overjoyed with most animals and their new willingness to approach her for attention. She especially loves cats because she can pick them up and better feel their fur and purring. Her favorite cat is an orange stray in Diamond City that she calls Claude. 

Piper Wright: A companion for Nat when she’s out adventuring, an unbiased friend to bounce the latest opinion piece off of before going to print, and a lap-warmer for when you’re typing up the latest article about the exploits of the Minutemen - what’s not to like? The Wright family cat is a slippery, elegant calico named Sugar Bomb. 

Preston Garvey: While the Minutemen forts and settlements definitely lean more toward keeping dogs around for security purposes, I think Preston likes his pets quieter and less likely to bowl you over in excitement. The one most likely to sleep with him in his bunk at Sanctuary is a grumpy gray gentleman named Anchovy. 

Deathclaws

Veronica Santangelo: If anyone is crazy enough to swipe a deathclaw egg from a nest and try to hatch, rear and train a personal killing machine named Izzy, it’s Veronica. This will probably just alienate her from her Brotherhood chapter even more, but I’m sure she would take special care to make sure that her usual Mojave Wasteland haunts take a peek through a scope to see if the approaching deathclaw has a human on its back before taking a shot. 

Dogs

Clover: I don’t think Clover gets out beyond Paradise Falls much, so the only animals she’s used to are the dogs the raiders bring around when passing through. She probably has favorites among the usual visitors and enjoys tossing them bits of meat when she’s allowed to get away from Eulogy and Crimson. If liberated, she’d probably get at least three of her own dogs to watch over her while she sleeps: One small dog to carry with her, a Pekingese or Pomeranian descendant named Coco, and two large dogs to follow through on intimidation and protection, a mastiff named Rock and a Doberman descendant named Roll. 

Jericho: Jericho doesn’t deserve a dog but he’d probably have one around anyway to sniff out caps caches and hidden loot after he’s shot everyone in the vicinity. Some slinky beagle mix named Dewey, probably. 

Fawkes: I don’t think Fawkes would be picky at all about what kind of dog he’d have. He strikes me as the type who would adopt any half-friendly mutt he ran across. I do think he would have a bit of a soft spot for friendlier mutant hounds, though, and maybe view their mutated circumstances as similar to his own. He’d also be absolutely amazing at playing fetch. Just imagine how far he could lob a stick or ball. All of his dogs would have literary names too, like Byron and Agatha and Edgar. 

Craig Boone: Though he’s a bit of a prodigy at sniping, Boone knows his limitations when it comes to spotting hidden enemies on the horizon. I can see him having a hound dog at his side to find the more elusive ones and help him get rid of them faster. Maybe a bloodhound mutt named Bravo. 

Cait: Doesn’t like people, but she adores dogs. Having had the life where she’s been abused, exploited and forced into slavery, she’s keenly aware that those like the ones who took advantage of her treat dogs much the same. She’s very protective of any dog she encounters and is very likely to punch you in the face if you so much as look at one wrong. She’d probably name any pup she adopted Lucky. 

Hancock: Honestly, he’s just a fan of any animal that is happy to hang out with you whether you’re drunk, high, fighting raiders or patrolling downtown Boston. The Goodneighbor strays know him as the guy who always has mirelurk jerky in his pockets. His favorite is a rough-and-tumble, black-and-white spotted cattle dog descendant that he cheekily calls King George. 

Robert MacCready: He’s not quick to trust dogs, but once he’s sure they’re not a threat, they’re one of the few critters around which he’ll relax completely. He’s still a little wary of them around Duncan, but any dog that’s a part of his family is more or less his son’s permanent babysitter. 

Nick Valentine: Dogmeat is also basically his dog. The two have a history of working cases together, with Dogmeat just turning up whenever a trail goes cold and leading Nick to the evidence he needs to reopen his investigation. Nick doesn’t know how or why Dogmeat does it, but he’s not about to ruin a good thing. 

Strong: I don’t think he would turn down a ferocious mutant hound as a friend. He’d probably feed it mole rats and call it something like Killer. 

Foxes

Beckett: This former raider has a love-hate relationship with a fox that keeps going through his trash. He affectionately calls him Lil’ Bastard. 

Sofia Daguerre: Having crashed back to an earth she doesn’t recognize, I think Sofia would be tickled that the foxes of Appalachia have basically stayed the same despite the bombs. I can see her leaving dinner scraps out on her porch for one that she sometimes spots in the foliage, and slowly coaxing the critter to come into the light. She names her Scarlett once she finally convinces her to eat out of her hand. 

Mega sloths

Settler forager: I would not be at all surprised if this man ran into a mega sloth in the Mire and decided to try befriending it. The creature, probably surprised at this old guy’s nerve, decided to accept the handful of leaves he offered and grew slowly more fond of the guy’s persistence. It doesn’t know its name is Fergus but it does know that if a human is wearing overalls, it’s probably not a threat. 

Mole rats

Deacon: Alright, hear me out. Deacon has a fondness for underdogs, and mole rats are about as underdog as they come. I think Deacon thinks these little guys are cute despite their wrinkles and buck teeth, and I think he sees the value in having a tunneling pet that likes to collect shiny things. One of his deep cover hideouts is in an old tunnel system in the northern Commonwealth, where he hangs out with a young mole rat named Henry. 

Owls

Raider punk: This radio operator got wind of an abandoned nest of owlets in Appalachia early on in his career and, being the nearest to the report, decided to rescue the little guys. Now he has three owls that occasionally drop in at his camp to hoot and accept handouts: Nona, Decima and Morta. While he’s still fond of them, he’s usually disappointed that they aren’t the Mothman coming to visit. 

Rad chickens

Yasmin Chowdhury: Ever the opportunistic cook, she picked up the practice of raising chickens from the settlers at Foundation and has four hens of her own: Parsley, Sage, Rosemary and Thyme. The “ladies,” as she refers to them, give her a constant stream of eggs for omelets. 

Ravens

Settler wanderer: This gal has an affinity with birds, who are always on the move like her. She admires their ability to be untethered and let the wind take them far and wide. Nevertheless, she likes to scatter corn when they come close to her on the road, and formed a sort of friendship with a particularly handsome specimen that she calls Tornado. 

Wolves

Old Longfellow: This guy is the epitome of the meme about dads not wanting pets and then instantly falling in love with whatever animal enters their life. He probably found an injured wolf pup in his travels around the island and took pity on it, nursing it back to health in his cabin. It’s still got a bit of a twisted paw, but follows him around and listens like any other dog and answers to the name Lamoine. 

Yao guai

Porter Gage: I bet this guy adopted an orphaned bear cub and raised it by hand. Now it’s so big that even if Gage thinks he’s an easy target for other raiders due to his age, he’s much less likely to get singled out than he thinks because he has a yao guai following him around like a puppy. The bear’s name is Fuzzy Wuzzy. It has no hair. 

No pets, thanks

Charon: Too likely to accidentally wind up in the line of fire. 

Sergeant RL-3: Too easily corrupted by Communist influences. 

Arcade Gannon: Too much time spent getting in your way. 

Codsworth: Too likely to make messes. 

Paladin Danse: Too many wasted resources. 

X6-88: Too much of a liability. 

Ada: Too easy to lose when on the move. 

Solomon Hardy: Too unsanitary. 

[pixycrew]

What I think switching companion dialogue would be with danse after blind betrayal 

Danse to piper

Danse: be careful out there, piper. Keep him/her safe.

Piper: no problem, tinman. We’ll be alright.

Piper to danse

Piper: heya danse. Your turn. Be careful out there, tin can.

Danse: *slight amuse in his voice* thanks, piper. Goodbye.

Danse to nick valentine

Danse: uh, valentine. Be careful out there with him/her. Alright?

Valentine: *chuckle* yes, danse. We’ll be fine.

Nick valentine to danse

Valentine: how are you doing, danse?

Danse: uhm.. better. I suppose.. thanks..

Danse to cait (probably won’t change much)

Danse: just make sure to keep him/her safe.

Cait: yeah, yeah. I heard you.

Cait to danse

Cait: there’s nothing quite like the smell of power grease and testosterone.

Danse: uhh.. the aroma is rather.. pungent.

Danse to curie (pre change)

Danse: take extreme caution, miss nurse.

Curie: oh Monsieur Danse, you can just call me curie!

Curie to danse (pre change)

curie: why, Monsieur danse! How is your mental and physical health?

Danse: both are... as good as they can be..

Danse to curie (post change)

Danse: I didn’t realize you could switch bodies into a synthetic body from a robot.

Curie: Monsieur Danse, science is never at a line!

Curie to danse (post change)

Curie: oh, Monsieur Danse! We must talk about scientific research! I’d love to get your opinion on it!

Danse: y-yeah. I don’t see why not. I have some knowledge of some things..

Danse to Preston

Danse: take care of the ‘general,’ won’t you?

Preston: oh, don’t worry. I’ll take care of our general.

Preston to Danse

Preston: Danse. Nice to see you again, man.

Danse: uh.. you too. Take care.

Danse to Hancock

Danse: ...take care.

Hancock: softening up to me, finally? Heh.

Hancock to danse

Hancock: take care, crewcut.

Danse: *clears throat* you too, Hancock..

Danse to dogmeat

Danse: alright, boy. Be safe with him/her.

Dogmeat: b o r f

Dogmeat to danse

Dogmeat: *whine*

Danse: don’t worry, boy. I’ll make sure him/her return safe.

Danse to Maccready

Danse: stay out of trouble, I don’t want to hear about him/her getting into any.

Maccready: yeah, Danse, I couldn’t hear you over all that clanking.

Maccready to Danse

Maccready: oh boy, it’s the tin can. I’ll be leaving now before I get shot.

Danse: *snorts quietly* hm.. good choice.

Danse to Deacon

Danse: hope you’re not keeping anything else from me.

Deacon: ..besides the lil beep boop in you, I say you’re fine.

Deacon to Danse

Deacon: ah, Danse. How’s the whole uh.. getting caught up with being a-

Danse: *rather hesitant* I’m fine, Deacon. Thank you.

Danse to Strong

Danse: ...

Strong: metal man quiet..

Strong to Danse

Strong: metal man strong, someday strong s m a s h

Danse: uh-

Danse to Codsworth

Danse: make sure to keep him/her safe, Codsworth.

Codsworth: of course Mister Danse! You take care now!

Codsworth to Danse

Codsworth: I hope you have a successful mission, Mister Danse!

Danse: thank you Codsworth, take care.

Danse to x6-88

Danse: ... goodbye.

X6: your hesitation is understood. 

X6-88 to Danse

X6: You have the training and equipment to handle this assignment. The Institute’s future will be in good hands.

Danse: ... you have the wrong idea about me.

[set-phasers-to-whump]

can’t go home

prompt: can’t go home

whumpee: nick burkhardt

fandom: grimm

hi hallo! this fic is set i guess after s4 but like i don’t remember what really happens in the season and also i don’t care lmao...only relevant stuff is that juliette and kelly died. this is pre-ship nick/hank and might be a lil cliche and dumb but it’s valentines day so i think i’m allowed :) hope you enjoy!

His house is not his house anymore. He thinks maybe it hasn’t been for a long time. Since before this. It’s only hitting him now, though. That this is no longer his home. 

The house is full of blood. Not literally - it has been scrubbed clean, now. But this matters very little. The blood goes deeper, sinks into the very bones of the place. There will always be blood in the house. Blood and death. Too much death. Death in all the places they’d used to live.

He doesn’t know where to go. He can’t stay there, in the house that’s no longer his. It was not his house when she died, and it is not his house now. He isn’t allowed to stay. And anyway, he doubts that he could stomach it. 

He’s standing on the sidewalk outside with a duffel bag on his shoulder, looking up at the dark windows as if suddenly a light will flicker on behind them, when a car pulls up beside him. Hank pokes his head out the window and tells him to get in. He does. 

“We’re going to my place,” Hank says. “Well, we’re picking up a pizza first. And then we’re going to my place.”

Eating is about the last thing he wants to do right now, but he says nothing. In fact, he says nothing the whole time they’re in the car. He just sits and stares out the window and holds the warm pizza in his lap. Hank turns the radio on and hums along tunelessly, but he, too, says nothing. There’s no tension in the absence of voices - it’s an understanding, companionable type of quiet. 

They sit in Hank’s living room and eat the pizza right out of the box. Or, Hank does. Nick picks up a piece, takes a single bite, and sets it back down. Hank gives him a look but says nothing, merely raising his eyebrows in a wordless question and then taking the abandoned slice when Nick gives him a small nod. 

They keep sitting on the couch, nearly close enough that they’re touching, long after the pizza has disappeared. Hank looks at something on his phone. Nick looks at the wall and lets his thoughts wander. 

Mainly, he thinks about this place. Hank’s place. A home without bloodstains and the stench of death. The familiar layout, the familiar smell, the years worth of memories…parties, post-work hangouts, sports games, movie nights, game nights. Getting patched up in the bathroom on multiple occasions. Staying late and falling asleep on the couch. Never once being turned away or asked to leave. This is a kind of home, too, he thinks. He wants to hold onto it tightly and never let go. He cannot lose this place - he cannot lose this person. 

“You okay?” Hank asks, in a soft, low voice. Nick forces his attention away from the wall, away from his thoughts. 

“No,” he says, because they are beyond lying now. He can’t go home, will never go home again, to that house, to those memories, but here he is in another home, with other memories, and this one is still here, and the person that makes this place a home is still alive, and Nick himself is still alive. His whole life he has been surrounded by death but here he is, alive. It feels cruel, in a way, that death should take so much from him but leave him be. 

He wonders whether he shouldn’t push Hank away, so as not to lose him. He thinks maybe he should put distance between himself and everyone he loves, because the people he loves get killed. He thinks for a second that he is going to do it, that he is going to tell Hank to forget about him for his own safety, but then Hank puts an arm around him and pulls him close and Nick goes, leaning into him and holding on quite helplessly as all of his emotions spill out of him. 

--

It is a long while before Nick stops crying. Even then, Hank keeps holding on, and Nick doesn’t pull away. 

“You’ve still got me,” Hank says, one hand in Nick’s hair and the other splayed out across his back. “I know it’s not - I know, but you’ve got me, and Monroe, and Rosalee, and I know I can’t exactly make any promises but I don’t care. I swear I’m always gonna be here for you. You got that?”

Nick nods, and this alone feels like a victory. 

“You’re gonna take my bed, and you’re gonna spend the night,” Hank says, and he makes sure his voice conveys that there is no room for argument. “And after that, you can stay for as long as you want.”

Actually, you can stay forever, he thinks, though he doesn’t dare say it aloud - not now, not like this. 

“Are you sure?” Nick asks, and his voice is wrecked but solid.

“Of course I’m sure. As long as you want.”

“Thank you.”

There’s nothing to thank me for, Hank thinks. Having you here feels like home. “Anytime,” is what he actually says, because you feel like home seems a bit too much for the current conversation. 

Nick stands up, scrubs a hand down his face, picks up his duffel bag. “I’m gonna -” he says, and gestures towards the bathroom. 

While Nick is gone, Hank sets up the couch for himself, grabbing a blanket, a spare pillow, and a battered paperback to pass the time - it’s late, but he doesn’t feel like sleeping. There is something protective in him that is very much awake. 

Nick emerges from the bathroom in pajamas and immediately makes his way towards the couch. Hank can read his intentions long before he says a word.

“Nope, I said you were taking my bed.”

“I can’t -”

“You can.”

“But -”

“No buts. You’re taking the bed.”

“I can’t kick you out of your own bed.”

“I can’t let you sleep on the couch.”

“You could -” Nick starts, and at the same time Hank ventures, “I could -”

--

Not five minutes later, Nick is lying down on the right side of Hank’s bed, curled into a ball and facing away from him. Hank is on the left, flat on his back and ostensibly staring at the ceiling, though every few seconds he’s turning his head to look at Nick. 

After a little while, he’s sure Nick has fallen asleep, but suddenly his voice comes out of the darkness, tired but alert and very unsure.

“Did you mean what you said before? That I could stay, for a little while?”

“Of course I meant it. For as long as you want, my house is your house.”

Nick sniffs, and for a second Hank worries that he’s said the wrong thing. But then Nick rolls over and looks at him and asks, “you mean that, too?” and Hank says, “yeah, I mean that, too.”

Nick nods and then rolls back over. Hank goes back to staring at the ceiling. 

You can stay forever, he thinks again, sneaking another glance at Nick in the dark. Please stay forever. 

thanks for reading! i had a nice time writing this :) i hope you enjoyed, and happy valentine’s day! i love u all <3

[urbanqhoul]

Coffee For Your Head [Fallout 4- Nick Valentine & John Hancock]

sSOOO

this is is kinda my first attempt at writing short lil fanfiction, I’ve written before for video’s n such but I’m by no means great at it so plz dun stab me I just wanted to write some fluff for my fav ship quq.

This takes place in my prewar AU- aka fallout 4 companions if they existed before the bombs dropped n all that fun stuff

---

“Think ya really need to work on impulse control, kid.” Nick said flatly as he carefully tried to keep John from falling over in his drunken state well they stumbled back home.

“To hell with that...! Those assholes were practically begging for it...” The smaller man grumbled as he almost tripped over his own feet, causing them both to stumble forward before Nick corrected it. 

They’d both had a painfully long week with a particularly bleak case to solve involving a missing spouse. 

It was by no means out of the ordinary but something about this one specifically had stuck with him and he decided to distract his brain from it with a visit to the local pub.

 As always John insisted on tagging along claiming it was “To help him home” afterwards when they both knew full well who was more likely to get passed out drunk. Predictably the night had proceeded with some banter well Hancock sporadically got side tracked by challenging other patrons to drinking games. 

It was during one of these ventures that ended in Hancock roughed up, bruised with a bloody nose followed by getting kicked out of the bar. 

“...You know I’m pretty used to you getting into a tussle or two- But usually it has a reason. Care to tell me why you tried to knock the daylights out of a stranger?” Valentine prompted, raising an eyebrow.

His response was simply an annoyed groan as he wiped blood from his mouth, “Can we just take a fuckin’ bus or something- its too damn cold and I think the cunt fractured my knee…”

Ignoring it then, alright…

“Think they might call the cops if they see you like this, Really don’t need to end the night in the drunk tank with Danse starting us down like a bunch of roaches. Sides we’re almost home.” Nick said tiredly before carefully taking on more of John’s weight to keep him off his bad leg. 

---

“Sign up now and prepare for the futu-”

The television was promptly turned off leaving the only sound in the room, the gentle buzz of the coffee maker, and a snort of irritation from Hancock as he laid flopped over on the couch.

 Nick had just finished tending to his injuries and left him in the kitchen, well he prepared something to combat the inevitable hangover.

“Can’t tell you how sick I am of seeing vault tecs trash everywhere. Like hiding away in a hole in the ground is an amazing alternative and not a slower, more boring death.” He shuffled through the endtable’s drawer before pulling out a thin can of mentats- only to have it promptly snatched away by Nick and replaced with a warm coffee.

“Really looking to just lose every last bit of grey matter you have left tonight aren't you?” The detective chided as he sat next to him, paying no mind to the glare he received before John reluctantly sipped his drink.

After a moment of silence he spoke up again, “...Are you ready to talk about it?”  He asked slowly. “It isn’t like you to pick fights with folks who didn’t earn it.” “He did.”  Came the sharp reply before being cut off by an irritatingly loud slurp as he chugged the rest of the coffee. “Piece of shit- he was talking a load of garbage about you.” John muttered quietly, indignation clear in his tone. “About Winters and...Jen…”

At the mention of his long passed fiance, Nick felt his heart drop into his stomach. A familiar emptiness that came anytime her and the bastard that took her away were brought back to the forefront of his mind. 

John avoided eye contact, gripping the coffee cup with such force it was a wonder it didn’t shatter. “...He went on and on about how you must’ve been so traumatized by everything to have taken up with some street rat druggie. I can deal with that type of shit towards me- it's basically my entire life but using...everything you went through as some petty fucking insult- You don’t deserve that.” 

Nick started to say something before cutting himself off, his half hungover brain trying to process everything he’d said. 

Thanks to the high publicity of the Eddie Winters case, he’d become well known within diamond city. 

Though he took the high road and ignored it, he knew how much people loved to talk about him. About the broken man who’d lost everything trying to catch Winters only for him to get away scot-free. 

It’d been several years since all of this transpired but the moment he was found to be in a relationship with Mayor Mcdonough’s brother- everyone of course started to talk again. 

A stoic old private eye who lost to a crime boss, taking up with a drugged up vigilante was far too ironic for the public to resist. It baffled him how much free time the tabloids had to waste on him, exploiting the tragedy of his past and ‘scandal’ of his present.  

 Hancock had a way of hiding how much things bothered him. Most who were unfamiliar with him would say he was an overly confident arrogant jackass. And well there was a certain truth to that, those who knew him better would find that it was a façade. 

Nick could see it slipping out right now. The brash part of him that was quick to fight a judgmental prick fading away, revealing the hurt man underneath. The part of him that became tough because life didn’t give him any other choice. The part that needed him right now.

Unsure of what to say, Val reached over and pulled him into a tight hug that seemed to have caught him by surprise. 

“...You know I don’t give a damn about what anyone else thinks right?” John tensed up before relaxing in his embrace, nuzzling tiredly into his shoulder. “I know...It's just- Feel like I’m makin’ life harder for you. You’ve already gotten more than your fair share of bullshit from the world.”

“Doll they can talk all they want. I’m lucky to have you, Mayhem n’ all~ ” Nick couldn’t help a faint smile when Hancock’s hold on him tightened followed by a snort as he peeked up. “Ya need to give yourself more credit, you’ve been the best thing to happen to me in a long time…” 

“You’re real fuckin’ cheesy you know that?” John teased planting a soft kiss on his neck, “Do me a favor and take me to bed already, I need to sleep for at least the next year. That asshole was a shit fighter but he did manage to get a few decent bruises in on my legs.” He insisted, letting himself fall over into Nick's arms. “Think you just might be lookin’ for an excuse to not walk a few feet.” With a tired chuckle, Nick lifted Hancock up with what seemed like no effort at all.

“Ya know you’re surprisingly strong for being such an old fuck~” 

“Mm, think it might have more to do with you having the body weight of a starving cat, but that's just an educated guess.. “ 

[its-sixxers]

maybe it’s a lil narcissistic but man it’s fun to go back to older fic and reread it and fall in love with your babies all over again

in poking through l’appel du vide i think the early chapter where deacon and eleanora go to diamond city might be my favorite. he’s disguised as a security guard, she’s disguised as a scavver, it’s all supposed to be a trial run to see how good she is at the job and then nick valentine ruins everything and it was a joy to write. also it’s where the first lil’ seed of something more to their relationship is planted.

i love nick and that’s also why i basically gave him dogmeat in my canon because eleanora does way too much dangerous shit for a doggie to be safe. :(

[jatne-jezra]

Hiya Could i have a matchup? I'm bi, a night owl, and cat person. Im very sarcastic and love cracking jokes. A ride or die friend. I enjoy cartoons, fanfiction, writing, movies, anything space related and documentaries and photography. I have a lil bit of social anxiety too but enjoy being around people ik. I love music! I'm pretty open to doing anything once. Also! If you wanna try matchups maybe you should turn anon on. A lot of people feel more comfortable sending asks that way. Ty!

Oh shoot, I had no idea my anon was off! Thank you so much!

Now onto the matchup! I match you with... Nick Valentine!

The two of you get along pretty well!

⭐️ The night owlness you have is no problem for the synth the doesn’t need sleep. He stays awake with you to keep you company, and can still watch over you when you finally crash.

⭐️ Your humor compliments Nick’s well, with your sarcastic quips providing a good deal of entertainment for each other.

⭐️ Your love of cartoons and movies gives Nick happy memories of the pre-war life, and as long as he can remember the piece of media you’re talking about, you two can bond over it and talk for hours about what you loved and hated of it.

⭐️ Nick isn’t really one to sit in a single place for too long, so he’d jump at the opportunity to take you to see beautiful sights so you can actually take lovely photos of your own.

⭐️ Nick is understanding of your social anxiety, and is very respectful of it, making sure to steer you away from large crowds or talk to someone in your place if you don’t want to.

⭐️ Nights where the two of you are alone together are Nick’s favorites. He loves to just play some soft music and dance with you.

⭐️ Overall, you and Nick are an adorable couple and one to be reckoned with.

[freesidexjunkie]

Fallout 4 companions in order of romanceability

What's the point of doing this? Quarantine boredom. And so that maybe, one day, Todd will see this and use it to learn what people actually want out of a romance arc. Group effort with @lilithgaskarth

1. Deacon

Deacon is the quintessential romance choice. He's funny, hot, rebellious, he's got an attractive voice, and he wants to make the world better for an oppressed people. His backstory (if it's true; you never know with him) breaks your heart and makes you just wanna hold him and tell him everything will be okay. Plus, Todd has forbidden us to romance him, which only makes us want him more.

2. MacCready

MacCready is a blast from the past. If you had told me that Robert Joseph MacCready and the kid Maxson from the Capital Wasteland would make an appearance in this game, and that MacCready was a sweet guy trying to do right by his son and deal with loss, while Maxson was a genocidal maniac with a cult-like following, I would've said you surely had them confused. He's caring, protective, sensitive. He's cute. He's super sarcastic, but in a really funny way that he can pull off and make attractive. Why wouldn't you romance him?

3. Hancock

Hancock has a rough exterior, but he's sweet and deserves to be happy. He's had a rough life, and his self destructive tendencies haven't helped. But at his core, he wants to help the little guy, and he adores you if you help him do that. Also, he's the only one who canonically likes you already when you tell him your feelings. But he feels like he doesn't DESERVE you and I just have a lot of feelings about him okay ;-;

4. Piper

Piper is a solid romance option, and an even more solid friend. She's got a cute lil nickname for you. She's got jokes. She wants to help the world, but also fight it for being so crappy to people, which is both admirable and highly relatable. Plus, every fanboy obsessed over her "girl-next-door" vibe, which as a girl I hate the whole girl next door trope that guys try to put on girls, and she's way more than "girl next door" level, but whatever I don't control the fandom.

5. Preston

Preston lands at #5 solely because while he's not better than anyone in 1-4, he's also not worse than anyone in 6-12. He's the true neutral in the litmus test of companions. He's passionate about the Minutemen but not super into being in a high rank (seriously man, why can't you be the General?) or having any real power. He's nice, but bland. He's a chocolate chip toaster waffle; not the worst choice by far, but not exactly what you want for breakfast.

6. Danse

Danse's name could easily be Paladin Dunce and I wouldn't even object. He's also super gung-ho about a racist organization that wants to kill most of my friends. Not cool, man. And about his personality. What personality? Being an asshole? That being said, he is easily the single hottest companion (unless you stan Cait but you can tell from her ranking that we do not). And his redemption arc is touching. Character growth Danse is someone we can get behind. And before that, he's still totally do-able. Personally, I could definitely have a one night stand with Danse before he stops being a dick and just regret it the morning after, awkwardly avoiding each other for the rest of our days.

7. Nick

Despite being so un-romanceable, Detective Valentine is my favorite companion, 100%. He's my best buddy. He's snarky and witty and he, like others on this list, really wants to help people. Plus, you two can totally vibe together about the good old days. However, being a great friend does not automatically make him romanceable. He's like that one friend that you're super super close with, but can honestly say you just wouldn't go there. It would be like dating your brother, or your uncle. And he's still dealing with all that stuff with Jennifer (I think that's her name) and his entire life of memories not really being his own. So, it's safe to say he's not looking for love. Still, I'd go there before going some places on this list.

8. Cait

These next two rankings are gonna get a lot of hate but I don't care, I stand by them. Cait has a great accent. I love it. I also really love her voice acting in Mass Effect: Andromeda, which doesn't deserve nearly as much hate as it gets but that's another topic. Cait's also feisty, which is always fun. That, and being a physically hot female character is enough to get most fanboys' engines racing. I'm sorry to tell you this, but that's not enough to make someone worth romancing. Furthermore, like Nick, she's going through some stuff, hard. Let her be in peace, you horny monsters.

9. Curie

Curie is an adorable personality. I agree with everyone else there. She's sweet and hella smart and she really wants to contribute to society. Still, I would never romance her in a million years. She's very precious. Too precious. She's like a baby. Are you really gonna romance a hyper-intelligent robot baby? Y'all just wanna romance her because she's got an accent and tits. You're way too horny. Stay away from Curie.

10. Cogsworth

One can make the argument that Cogsworth is the only person who understands the situation you're in, and who has lost the exact same thing as you. He truly cares about you and your family. If he could cry, he would break down in tears when he sees you walk down that hill from the vault. That being said, he is a Mr. Handy. Are you Mr. Zwicky? You could try to say "but Curie is a modified Miss Nanny, what makes her so special?" And I will answer you. She has been deliberately designed to be her own, independent, self-determining entity. Her processing power is also much higher than that of a robot butler. To reference Mass Effect again, it's the difference between an AI and a VI; the difference between romancing EDI, and romancing Avina. And also, just imagine that you just watched your husband (or wife if you play as Nate, which is 100% valid anyways) get murdered, after being tricked into cryogenic stasis when you watched the world get nuked into oblivion, while seeing your son get kidnapped. And now, you're gonna go home and start sleeping with the robot butler you bought together? Okay, sure. Bro for life? Definitely. A good boyfriend? Nah.

11. X6-88

There's not much to say about X6-88, because who can put up with the Institute's BS for long enough to really get to know him at all? He's a Terminator. He's a brainwashed killing machine. There's nothing attractive about him at all.

12. Strong

In previous games, super mutant companions had intelligent thoughts and conversations. They had moving life stories and experiences. They were good companions. Strong is not any of those things. Granted, it's still impressive that a Gen 2 super mutant is capable of being so...not violent. But I don't think anyone is gonna go there.

Final notes:

Dogmeat is exempt from this list for obvious reasons. DLC companions are also exempt, because the only one that's even remotely considerable is Porter and I don't care about him at all, much less enough to put him on the list. Nate should get an honorable mention, because he's a very sweet, caring, loving, devoted husband and father. Nora should not get any honorable mention.

[carndriverrecords]

First Blog Post 3/20/20

Started CnD Records today. Feels Good.

Working on some diss tracks. Not sure if they see it coming - doesn’t matter either way.

Planning to release Car and Driver first real record this Friday 3/20/20. Driving Test Driver Fest 1. 

Self release first record - another 20 tracks next week. Compile top 10 - 15 for first release with other label - thinking Terrible, Kranky, blu ish label or Thrill Jockey. Citrus City a no-go for now. Maybe just keep building CnD records.

Be the middle man - take advantage of opportunities without sacrificing my bands’ (and those I represent) integrity.

Reach sleep destroyer.

Last night at Ted’s - great DJ set. Kidz bop remixes, Fancy. Crowd hated it. Ted disappointed we had to leave but it’s ok with everyone. Tall guy took aux right out of computer, have video. Started dancing - cucked everyone. Everyone thinks they’re the crazy charismatic guy. Am I actually? I think so. Syd thinks so. 

CnD Fest 2 , 3 , 4 at Purchase and beyond. Would like to play apartments, Scully’s den in BK (reach out) and Philly, DC etc.

Next voice memo album - 20 - 25 tracks right now. Better than the first. Danny said best album ever.

Working on “My oh Maia Reason Why” video - my favorite video I’ve ever seen. Getting good feedback.

Important to collab with certain SUNY people before I go:

Members of Lip Critic, Dawson, Neal, Gabe.

Send stuff back and forth with Joseph Kress. 

Need to write song about not sharing a stage w unstable Car and Driver - cost me 2 gigs. Ok because I had the police interaction that night. 

Things have been working out quite well. Syd is keeping me in check. Main priorities are keep the energy going while I can and make sure everyone around me is comfortable with me doing my thing, specifically mom, sofia.

Going to Only Angels tomorrow to collab with Alex.

Tues/Wed in RI with Zach Gorton. Need to see Nick Holcomb, Sofia, Will Orchard if he’s around. Riley in Boston? Would love to. 

Visit Dad soon on the way to Richmond, in a few weeks perhaps. Grandma Roberta etc. They have a BBQ place now - I bet it’s great. 

Follow up in the morning (3 hours from now) with wedding band, Kevin Daniels, drummer etc.

Film sunrise sessions at Purchase: My Ride’s Here, Splendid Isolation, Keep me in your heart, Studebaker, Cat’s in the Cradle, Everybody that you know. Don’t think twice, Boots of Spanish Leather, Someday my Prince, Teenage Dirtbag, Arthur (Woof Woof), Forget You, Signed Sealed Delivered, Superstition, The Promise, Hold me now (TT), Love on Top, Townes Van Zandt, 1-800 superstar, Evan Wright, Tom Petty, Blinded By the Light, Searching for a Heart, Mag Field’s, Barenaked Ladies, TMBG, Dolly Parton one sided love, Byrds, Beatles, Kinks, Stones, Parquet Courts, T Swift (Red, Way I loved you), Mitski, Sasami, Anything Could Happen, Beach House, He Needs Me, These Days, YLT, Beach Boys, Big Star Take Care, G500/Luna, Felt, Psychic TV, Shelia, BJM, Yellow Sarong, Over and Over, Hazel St, Heatherwood, Helicopter, He Would’ve Laughted, I wanna be your lover, The pump, Good enough (sleep destroyer), Them airs, BH (14, indian summer), help me scrape mucus off my brain), Beach Comber, DO YOUR THING, Icehead, Bobby, 1000 times, WIll Orchard, Bon Iver, MGMT, Tame impala, Instant Crush, etc. Art Vandelay, Quick Canal, Stereolab, Grouper, Broadcast, Animal Collective, Panda Bear, Bachelor Kisses, Cranberries, Cure, Pastels, MBV, I found a reason, pale blue eyes, Deerhoof, Gretel Alex G, Dancing w tears in my eyes, Elvis Costello, No age(things i did), Are ya ok, Maus, Ariel, R Stevie, Aphex Twin, Zomes, Vampire Weekend etc.

Bring Laptop for Beats on some and lyrics for all. 

Love life more than ever before. Music feels so good. Want to help, make amends, everything that moondog did. Don’t be homeless much longer.

Not sure if I like throbbing gristle - definitely like Psychic TV.

How savage should diss tracks be? Very? Match the severity of the person’s treatment of me/others. Aka - pretty bad for all except for Auto.

Listened to new Kanye today - 10x better and more influential than death grips. 

Realized today that i’ve spent my whole life wishing I was Kanye and now I am Kanye. Feels very good.

Everyone is gifted but internet makes us angst. 

I am mostly Camus right now - maybe more Kierkegaard soon. Religion and Terrence Malik. Still need to read books.

Order of Books: The graduate Portrait of the artist Consider Lobster Infinite Jest Pynchon Ulysses (At recommendation of American gamer association)

Syd is incredibly gifted. Want to help her feel comfortable doing art/work here in the chaos but also sort out the chaos for both of ours’ sake. I thrive in it, she tolerates well. Want to move to Riverdale still, maybe East Williamsburg with Backpack Chris. We’ll see about money. Philly perhaps, little too far. Jersey is good location but bad commute. Bad to RI. 

Visit RI and Boston Tues - Thurs. Sell Cigarettes at Concerts. Feels right.

Keep smoking for now - quit end of summer perhaps. 

Don’t have Corona Virus - glad we are not quarantined. Still be smart. Don’t expose mom regardless. Protect at ALL costs. 

Really though, why does Journee hate me? Write new track (Journee into forever nevermore not now not ever (Lou)) or Journee into SJW self righteous moral posturing (way too savage - maybe voice memo outro)

AR Kane album is incredible. Syd loves too. Sample everything.

Crazy - sound better at jazz than ever in my life. Exploring harmony - never practice. Teach free lessons all the time. Love the diminished scale. Might be best jazz guitarist to ever live. Time will tell. Would be cool long term. Prefer singing. 

Getting good at piano too.

I’m my favorite lyricist/comedian/actor.

Is maia right, acting isn’t hard? Weird they can’t act.

^Remember to delete^

Don’t share this on Facebook yet.

Why does Journee hate me so much? Just the Louis CK joke?

People who stay home and do nothing hate to see irreverent people doing things.

People like when you’re losing - don’t like to see you win.

^That makes me sound crazy.

F00D outsider might make me famous first.

Need to keep up with legal situation.

Hope mom and dad both live long. Call Syd, get something nice for everyone in family. Get weird jewel cases. Order jewelry from etsy. Post merch on bandcamp.

Finish album art soon. Music videos. Get better at animation etc. Pay Ben for his poster. Actually really good. Maybe album art? Duo album! Record in Wisconsin, release under his name. WIll success be good for Ben? I think so. Still can’t believe Liv told him I wasn’t ok. Wow - good content for lyrics. You truly cannot write this.

How will people react to diss tracks? Extremely negatively. Or no reaction. We shall see. Maybe no real names in the titles...... only on Oh my. 4 names in titles is too many. Don’t release Auto track. Maybe on Voice Memos. 

Track List: Good God Bed Head Rosa Reprise Oh My House Pop 1 skydive Pop 2 APhex GVO Pay 4 Take some Cherish Stars in F Are ya ok too bright Honeys Get to work Everybody That You Know Frost Bit BPC NYC New Age Heimet Helmet Deadbeat dads watermill for slitting bars romantic song david byrne Cinema study in cinema Brain ego Cherry doc marten Can’t liv w/o Venmo groceries Oh you like? Dancin DJ blues We are the State Farm robots Danny dorito is a dirty devito My funny valentine Zoomer blues The thing abt genres Blss Like minds ft dawson Lil toucha jazz Introducing car and driver The holy moment empire Ethics 101 - gma in the street Otto is sad I don’t know what it means! Operatic mellismatic Car and driver fest will be a success! Car and driver fest was a bust again! Cipha’s comedy corner Ryder Be gone evil atonal spirits!

Unreleased mental breakdown compilation ep:

I like all music! I’m a stupid pos Electric micro bike Get off your phone! John frusc Nice song Lap steel for 2 My masseuse advice Bed head wash sq Punchie John Maus yoyo interview Diminished  kinda thing

Build the NYC scene, w Blu ish, Evan, 1 800, sweet joseph, Comics Club, Dawson, Sloppy Jane, Wheatus,

See Jack Fortin in NYC soon. Either my event or his. 

Things are still good. Syd will be a great filmmaker. WIll maybe will end up with a dancer or a filmmaker - Probably not a musician. WIll have many loves. 

Things are good right now - hope they stay that way. 

Feel like Ezra Keonig - hopefully someone reads this one day and agrees. Different time in history and the internet - hope this is less cringe than Ezra’s blog , probably not. Ezra, if you’re reading this, sorry. See ya at Bernie’s rally. 

[topconfessions]

Who are your favorite artists like not just kpop but in general?

I don't really listen to music much anymore like in terms of current artists. I'm probably that weirdo who listens to old songs (2000$, 2010s / late 2010s) so I'm out of the loop about a lot of current stuff.

Sue me but I love Chris Brown. He makes hits, he is talented and has it all but needs major help and counseling. Can't nobody tell me he wasn't suppose to be the mini MJ of our generation. But Drake took his place cause his life falling apart.

I used to like drake but he's too overhyped now and he looks foolish to me although I feel I would get along with him well if we ever met.

Rihanna but of course sis quit music.

Dua Lipa is great. I love her!

Shawn Mendes. He makes great music and he's cute even if he's gay Idc he could get it. He seems to be lost as a person but his music is a plus.

The Weeknd style has changed but I love him.

Kanye West I love him YEA YEA HE CRAZY YADA YADA he's a legend and all these rappers wouldn't be where they are without him, Jay Z and lil Wayne. Holy Trinity of today's artists.

Mariah Carey although shes semi retired and just a Christmas queen now.

I like Tame Impala very quirky and gold.

I love Feng Suave, they're great.

I love Masego, I love his sound and we need more of that.

I'm trying to get into H.E.R but ah, her sound is a bit flap.

Jonas Bros / DNCE love them and Nick is everything. Nick's last year album is still on rotation.

Was very into Ariana Grande but a lot of shit heads ruined that for me and she's a multi racial baiting sellout but I still listen to some of her songs. She's an artist I hate to love lmao.

Doja Cat I haven't listens to her planet her album but I love her music in general although her quirky nasally voice is annoying. Streets and uWu is my fave song by her.

Love Sleeping with sirens, bullet for my Valentine, mayday parade, all time low, fallout boy, etc. (Old bands I know

Maroon 5 I still follow although the music is different now.

BRITNEY SPEARS FOREVER!!!!!

Hoody is great and Jay Park did a great job with her, love her.

Utada Hilary & Koda Kumi are main stays.

I like Twice. They're music is adorable to me.

I don't really listen to him like that but Frank Ocean I like his music once in a while.

I want to like Coldplay but their music is very flat and Taylor Swift ish to me without the energy and pop. So I like One Republic and Imagine Dragons.

About to give Thundercat a try just to see what his music is like cause I stumbled upon that Them changes song and its great.

I could name so many but that's just some off the top of my head. You didn't state past or present artists so I'm just sipping allover but trying to stay current.

[carolinabronova]

Songs.

30 Seconds To Mars The Kill (Burry Me)

99 Souls The Girl Is Mine (ft. Destiny’s Child)

ABBA Lay All Your Love On Me

Adam Lambert Fever If I Had You

Adele Chasing Pavements Rolling In The Deep Send My Love Someone Like You When We Were Young

A-ha Take On Me

Akon Don’t Matter I Wanna Love You (ft. Snoop Dogg)

Alicia Keys If I Ain’t Got You No One

All Angels The Scientist

Ana Carolina É Isso Aí (ft. Seu Jorge)

Angus & Julia Stone A Heartbreak Big Jet Plane Big Jet Plane (Acoustic) Draw Your Swords Just A Boy Paper Aeroplane Yellow Brick Road

A Perfect Circle Counting Bodies Like Sheep To The Rhythm Of The War Drums

Arctic Monkeys 505 Brianstorm Do I Wanna Know? Fluorescent Adolescent I Wanna Be Yours One For The Road R U Mine? Stop The World Why’d You Only Call Me When You’re High?

Aretha Franklin Say A Little Prayer

Ariana & The Rose In Your Bed (Kevin Drew Remix)

Ariana Grande Almost Is Never Enough Bad Decisions Be Alright Be My Baby Best Mistake Dangerous Woman Everyday (ft. Future) Greedy Into You Jason’s Song (Gave It Away) One Last Time Right There (ft. Big Sean) Side To Side Sometimes

Athlete Rubik’s Cube

Austin Manuel I Just Want You To Love Me

Backstreet Boys If You Want It To Be Good Girl (Get Yourself A Bad Boy) I Want It That Way

Banks Drowning

Bee Gees How Deep Is Your Love More Than A Woman Too Much Heaven Tragedy

Ben E. King Stand By Me

Beyoncé 7/11 Baby Boy (ft. Sean Paul) Best Thing I Never Had Blow Countdown Drunk In Love Ego Formation Hold Up Love On Top Partition Sandcastles Sorry

Biel Demorô

Black Keys Howlin’ For You

Blue Öyster Cult Burnin’ For You (Don’t Fear) The Reaper

BoA Eat You Up

B.o.B So Good

Bon Iver Creature Fear Perth

Bonnie Raitt Can’t Make You Love Me

Bonnie Tyler Total Eclipse Of The Heart

Breaking Benjamin I Will Not Bow

Bright Eyes First Day Of My Life

Britney Spears 3

Bruce Springsteen Dancing In The Dark

Bruno Mars 24k Magic Calling All My Lovelies Chunky Gorilla (ft. Pharell Williams and R.Kelly) Locked Out Of Heaven Talking To The Moon That’s What I Like Treasure When I Was Your Man

Bryan Adams Heaven

Calvin Harris Feels (ft. Pharrell Williams, Katy Perry and Big Sean) This Is What You Came For (ft. Rihanna)

Camila Cabello Havana (ft. Young Thug)

Captain & Tennille Love Will Keep Us Together

Carly Rae Jepsen Run Away With Me Your Type

Cary Brothers Loneliest Girl In The World

Cash Cash Overtime

Charlie Brown Jr. Me Encontra

Charlie Puth Attention How Long Marvin Gaye (ft. Meghan Trainor)

Charli XCX Boys

Cheat Codes Let Me Hold You

Chet Baker My Funny Valentine

Chris Brown Liquor Show Me (ft. Kid Ink) Strip Take You Down

Christina Grimmie Must Be Love

Christina Perri distance

Chromeo Come Alive (ft. Toro Y Moi)

Ciara Body Party

City And Colour The Girl

Claudinho & Bochecha Fico Assim Sem Você Quero Te Encontrar

Clean Bandit Tears (ft. Louisa Johnson)

Coldplay Charlie Brown Hymn For The Weekend (ft. Beyoncé) Swallowed In The Sea Violet Hills Viva La Vida

Colbie Caillat Bubbly

Counting Crows Accidentally In Love

Cyndi Lauper Girls Just Wanna Have Fun Time After Time

Daft Punk Around The World Digital Love Harder Better Faster Stronger Lose Yourself To Dance One More Time Something About Us Technologic

Damien Rice 9 Crimes Delicate Rootless Tree The Blower’s Daughter

Danni Carlos Coisas Que Eu Sei

Daughter Landfill Medicine Run Touch

David Guetta Bad (ft. Vassy)

Dawin Dessert (ft. Silento)

Demi Lovato Sorry Not Sorry Stone Cold

Destiny’s Child Bills, Bills, Bills Bootylicious Independent Women Say My Name

Disclosure Latch (ft. Sam Smith)

DJ Snake Leon On (ft. MØ and Major Lazer) Middle

DNCE Cake By The Ocean

Drake Fake Love Hold On We’re Going Home How About Now Marvin’s Room One Dance Passionfruit Too Good (ft. Rihanna)

Dua Lipa New Rules

Duke Dumont Ocean Drive

Earth, Wind & Fire After The Love Has Gone Boogie Wonderland Fantasy Let’s Groove September

Eden Project drowning.

Ed Sheeran Cold Coffee Drunk Give Me Love Grade 8 I’m A Mess Kiss Me Little Bird One Night She Small Bump U.N.I The Man Wake Me Up

Ellie Goulding Love Me Like You Do On My Mind

Elvis Presley Can’t Help Falling In Love Suspicious Minds (You’re The) Devil In Disguise

Erasure A Little Respect

Escape The Fate Zombie Dance

Etha Franklin At Last

Evanescence My Immortal

Fetty Wap 679 (ft. Remy Boyz) Again My Way (ft. Monty) Trap Queen

Fifth Harmony All In My Head (Flex) (ft. Fetty Wap)

Flight Facilities Crave You Crave You (Adventure Club Remix)

Florence + The Machine Cosmic Love Caught Drumming Song Never Let Me Go Seven Devils

Flo Rida I Cry

Francoise Hardy Voila

Frank Sinatra Fly Me To The Moon If I Had You Moon River

Gabrielle Aplin Home Please Don’t Say You Love Me Start Of Time

G-Eazy F**k With U (ft. Pia Mia) Lady Killers (ft. Hoodie Allen)

George Martin Pepperland - Remastered

Gilberto Girl Vamos Fugir (Gimme Your Love)

Glen Hansard All The Way Down Falling Slowly Lies Say It To Me Now

Grayscale Palette

Gym Class Heroes Cupid’s Chokehold

Halsey Gasoline

Hozier Someone New Take Me To Church

Hudson Thames How I Want Ya

Hurts Illuminated Somebody To Die For Stay Unspoken

Ingrid Michaelson Can’t Help Falling In Love You And I

Iron & Wine Flightless Bird, American Mouth

Israel Novaes Vem Ni Mim Dodge Ram

Ivete Sangalo Quando A Chuva Passar Se Eu Não Te Amasse Tanto Assim

James Blunt You’re Beautiful

Jammil Praieiro

Jeff Buckley Hallelujah

Jeremih oui

João Bosco E Vinícius Chora Me Liga

Joe Walsh Turn To Stone

John Mayer Free Fallin’ Gravity Slow Dancing In A Burning Room

Johnny Cash Hurt

JoJo Beautiful Girls

Jon Secada If I Never Knew You (ft. Shanice)

Jordan Fisher All About Us

Jorge Vercilo Que Nem Maré

Jota Quest Blecaute (ft. Anitta and Nite Rodgers)

Justin Timberlake My Love (ft. T.I) Summer Love

Kanye West Bound 2 Power

Kate Nash Nicest Thing

Katy Perry Birthday

Kendrick Lamar DNA King Kunta Loyalty (ft. Rihanna) Poetic Justice (ft. Drake)

Kid Abelha Como Eu Quero

Kina Grannis Valentine

Kings Of Leon Pyro Sex On Fire

Kodaline All I Want

Kyle Edwards Starboy (Harder Better Faster Stronger Jersey Club)

Labrinth Jealous

Lady Gaga Bad Romance Do What U Want (ft. R.Kelly) Edge Of Glory G.U.Y Just Dance Marry The Night Million Reasons Monster Perfect Illusion Speechless The Cure You & I

Lana Del Rey Born To Die Dark Paradise Freak High By The Beach Love Religion Ridin’ (ft. A$AP Rocky) Sad Girl Serial Killer Video Games West Coast Young And Beautiful

Lauren Aquilina Wonder

Leonard Cohen Hallelujah

Leona Lewis Bleeding Love

Lil Dicky Lemme Freak

Lil Wayne 6 Foot 7 Foot

Linda Ronstadt I Will Always Love You

Lionel Richie Just Go (ft. Akon)

Lissie Everywhere I Go

Little Big Town Girl Crush

Los Hermanos Anna Julia

LS Jack Ô Carla

Lulu Santos Como Uma Onda Sereia

Lykke Li I Follow Rivers Until We Bleed

M83 My Tears Are Becoming A Sea

Madonna Material Girl

Maiara & Maraisa Medo Bobo

Mariah Carey #Beautiful (ft. Miguel) Emotions Obsessed Touch My Body We Belong Together

Marianas Trench Haven’t Had Enough

Marina & The Diamonds How To Be A Heartbreaker Oh No! Primadonna Teen Idle

Marisa Monte Depois

Maroon 5 Feelings Makes Me Wonder Stutter What Lovers Do

Marvin Gaye Sexual Healing

Maskavo Um Anjo Do Céu

Matthew Perryman Jones Only You

MC G15 Deu Onda

MC Leozinho Se Ela Dança, Eu Danço

MC Marcinho Glamurosa

Michael Sembello Maniac

Miguel Adorn coffee Simple Things Sure Thing

Mike Posner Cooler Than Me I Took A Pill In Ibiza Looks Like Sex

Miley Cyrus 23 (ft. Mike Will Made It, Wiz Khalifa and Juicy J) Wrecking Ball

MKTO Classic

MØ Fire Rides - Night Version

Mumford And Sons Little Lion Man Sigh No More White Blank Page

Muse Neutron Star Collision Plug In Baby Resistance Starlight Supermassive Black Hole Undisclosed Desires

My Chemical Romance Helena (So Long & Goodnight) I Don’t Love You The Light Behind Your Eyes

Natalie La Rose Somebody (ft. Jeremih)

Natiruts Me Namora

Nelly Dilemma (ft. Kelly Rowland)

Neon Trees Animal Everybody Talks Mad Love

Ne-yo Closer

NF Got You On My Mind

Niall Horan Slow Hands

Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds O Children

Nick Jonas Jealous Teacher Wilderness

Nigahiga Bromance (ft. Chester See) Nice Guys (ft. Chester See and KevJumba)

Ninja Sex Party FYI I Wanna F Your A Peppermint Creams Sex Training The Decision

Oasis Wonderwall

Olivver The Kid Attica ‘71

Olly Murs Dance With Me Tonight Kiss Me

Omarion Post To Be (ft. Chris Brown and Jhené Aiko)

One Direction Fireproof Happily Night Changes No Control Perfect Stockholm Sydrome Strong You & I

Outkast Hey Ya!

Panic! At The Disco Death Of A Bachelor Nine In The Afternoon

Papas Da Língua Eu Sei

Paramore Ain’t It Fun Misery Business Still Into You

Passanger Let Her Go

Paula Fernandes Não Precisa (ft. Victor e Leo)

P.Diddy Last Night (ft. Keyshia Cole)

Pentatonix Can’t Sleep Love Fantasy I Need Your Love La La Latch Love Again Natural Disaster

Pink F*cking Perfect Please Don’t Leave Me Sober So What Who Knew

Player Baby Come Back

Post Malone Rockstar

Psirico Lepo Lepo

R5 Dark Side

Rae Sremmurd Black Beatles

Raleigh Ritchie Bloodsport

Redfoo New Thang

Rich Homie Quan Flex (Ooh, ooh, ooh)

Richie Campbell Do You No Wrong

Rihanna Can’t Remember To Forget You (ft. Shakira) Don’t Stop The Music FourFiveSeconds (ft. Kanye West and Paul McCartney) Love On The Brain Needed Me Russian Roulette Te Amo Unfaithful Where Have You Been Wild Thoughts (ft. DJ Khaled and Bryson Tiller)

Rise Against Savior

Roberta Campos Minha Felicidade

Robin Thicke Get Her Back

Robot Koch Nitesky (ft. John Lamonica)

Ryan Adams Wonderwall

Sam Smith Nirvana Palace

Sarah Jaffe Clementine

Scorpions Rock You Like A Hurricane

Scott Bradlee’s Postmodern Jukebox Stacy’s Mom

Scouting For Girls Heartbeat

Seal Kiss From A Rose

Selena Gomez Bad Liar Fetish (ft. Gucci Mane) Good For You Hands To Myself Perfect Wolves (ft. Marshmellow)

Seu Jorge Carolina Mina Do Condomínio

Shania Twain From This Moment On Man! I Feel Like A Woman You’re Still The One

Shawn Mendes There’s Nothing Holding Me Back

Shura Touch (Canvas Remix)

Sia Cheap Thrills Elastic Heart

Simon & Garfunkel Bridge Over Troubled Water

Skank Ainda Gosto Dela Tão Seu Vamos Fugir Vou Deixar

Sleeping At Last As Long As You Love Me Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic Venus

Snoop Dogg Sensual Seduction

Stevie Nicks Edge Of Seventeen

Stevie Wonder Isn’t She Lovely

Story Of The Year Until The Day I Die

Talking Heads Psycho Killers

Taylor Swift Blank Space Love Story Safe And Sound (ft. The Civil Wars) Style Wildest Dreams

Tears For Fears Everybody Wants To Rule The World

The 1975 Chocolate FallingForYou Somebody Else UGH! The Sound

The Archies Sugar, Sugar

The Barr Brothers May 4th

The Bird And The Bee How Deep Is Your Love

The Black Eyed Peas Meet Me Halfway

The Black Keys Howlin’ For You

The Beach Boys Good Vibrations Wouldn’t It Be Nice

The Beatles Hey Jude Yesterday

The Black Eyed Peas Meet Me Halfway

The Cataracs Ready 4 The Weekend (ft. Icona Pop)

The Civil Wars Poison And Wine

The Cure Boys Don’t Cry

The Glitch Mob Between Two Points (ft. Swan)

The Irrepressibles In This Shirt

The Jackson 5 I Want You Back

The Killers Human Somebody Told Me When You Were Young

The Last Shadow Puppets Miracle Aligner

The Lonely Island 3-Way (The Golden Rule) I’m So Humble (ft. Adam Levine) Jizz In My Pants Spring Break Anthem

The Maine I Must Be Dreaming Into Your Arms

The Middle East Blood

The Neighbourhood Daddy Issues #icanteven (ft. French Montana)

The Platters Only You (And You Alone)

The Police Every Breath You Take Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic Roxanne

The Pretty Reckless You Zombie

The Script Breakeven

The Turtles Happy Together

The Weeknd Acquainted A Lonely Night Earned It I Feel It Coming Often Or Nah (Stwo Remix) Starboy The Hills Wicked Games

The White Strips Seven Nation Army

The Zombies Time Of The Season

T.I Whatever You Like

Tim Maia Descobridor Dos Sete Mares Gostava Tanto De Você Não Quero Dinheiro (Só Quero Amar)

Tinashe Superlove Quit You (ft. Lost Kings)

Tom Odell Can’t Pretend

Toni Braxton Un-Break My Heart

Toto Africa

Tove Lo Cool Girl

Tribalistas Aliança Já Sei Namorar Velha Infância

Troye Sivan Fools for him. Wild (ft. Alessia Cara)

U2 One (ft. Mary J Blidge)

Usher DJ Got Us Fallin In Love Hey Daddy (Daddy’s Home) U Remind Me

Van Halen Why Can’t This Be Love

Vinicius Cantuária Só Você

Wesley Safadão Aquele 1% (ft. Marcos & Belutti) Camarote

What So Not Jaguar

Whitney Houston I Have Nothing I Wanna Dance With Somebody I Will Always Love You

xxyyxx About You

War Why Can’t We Be Friends

Yvonne Elliman If I Can’t Have You

Zara Larsson Ain’t My Fault I Would Like So Good

Zella Day Hypnotic (Vanic Remix)