#i made the first version early on in my transition and it's interesting 2 me the difference in how i draw this

[techviolence]

let’s hold hands <3

[roipecheur]

Do you like omegaverse?

A secret, third option!

(Cut for length and nsfw text)

As a fandom phenomenon:

I did read the original J2 fics that kicked off this whole trend some years back

It's been interesting to see how it's evolved over the years. I was in SPN fandom back when it first became popular, and then I wasn't really in fandom and didn't read omegaverse for years

Take into account that is one person's perspective from the fandoms I was personally in, I have not done a widespread review of all things omegaverse

(I actually just checked the Journal of Transformative Works for an article on omegaverse as a trend, and didn't find one for the term omegaverse or by searching alpha AND beta AND omega, which is a little surprising to me)

In any case

Early days: cis male alpha/cis male omega pairings. The omega would have a self-lubricating asshole and smell irresistible to the alpha when they went into heat. Mentions of cis female omegas, but the focus was usually on the m/m pairing. Mentions of female alphas, but usually cis female alphas that milked the omega cis male's dick with a super pussy that like, locked down or something in a reverse of knotting. Sometimes cis male omegas could get impregnated and sometimes they were infertile and just had heats

Current trends: I've noticed way more intersex omegas. Alphas going into rut in addition to omega heats #itsequality. Mating bites. Family units as packs. Sometimes, psychic bonds come with mating bites and/or packs. Inability to physically leave someone you've just mated with. A lot more variety in how irresistible the heat/rut smell is and exactly what someone may want during their cycle, e.g., omegas going into "I want to nurse and cuddle my baby" mode instead of sex mode, alphas fighting each other to blow off steam. Alongside that, variety in how intense a heat/rut is, on a scale of mildly annoying/distracting but manageable to removing someone's higher brain functions and leaving only instinct. More omega/omega or alpha/alpha pairings. The concept of transitioning, where someone can go from alpha to omega, etc.

I think betas have remained mostly the same throughout, although I do remember something where betas had a kind of "glue the pack together" function in a newer fic rather than just being "regular humans" as in older fics

In wider culture:

The omegaverse lawsuit

Omegaverse fucking with AI datasets

This shit is hilarious and I genuinely hope we never stop

Common critiques:

1, Omegaverse is just reinventing sexism minus the women / it's so sexist that it's managed to remove women from a story about sexism

2, It's codifying top/bottom into gender

Honestly? Maybe sometimes? But it really depends on the story, and there are a lot of different versions out there, so I find this reductive

The one (1) omegaverse fic I wrote aligned both alphas and omegas more closely with the queer community than the sexism allegory while making it clear that they were also their own thing

Also, omegaverse started out as an excuse to write weird, kinky porn. A lot of it still centers around weird, kinky porn

Sometimes your hindbrain wants what it wants, "your kink is not my kink & that's ok", and you aren't trying to unpack the full implications of a world where this is real

Or, you want to put these bitches into a situation, and an omegaverse where character A benefits as an alpha and character B suffers as an omega is just an interesting situation

Like. I generally think it's whatever

Slash fandom has also been accused of sexism and gay fetishism in a variety of ways that are not exclusive to omegaverse, and I am keeping that can of worms firmly closed right now lmao

Weird sex and sex mechanics:

I love when people get weird with it. Omegaverse did not invent this, like I'm sure there were some 1950s sci-fi writers creating man-made alien pussy beyond our comprehension

Ovigonopods of Love: a Strange Horizons short story from 2001, featuring underwater bug sex involving three different sexes and metamorphosis, on the subject of weird sex that definitely predates omegaverse

My issue with og omegaverse, and part of the reason I didn't read it for such a long time, is that it doesn't get weird enough

Listen. Uh. Gonna talk about scat here, but listen.

If your asshole self-lubricates, you are unavoidably gonna shit yourself. Especially if you're getting your ass stretched by a knot and stuffed with an industrial amount of jizz for days on end. Some people can suspend their disbelief when reading omegaverse involving self-lubricating assholes, and godspeed, but I personally cannot

I think if you're going to imply ass babies, you may as well go all the way and give the guy a cloaca ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

That being said, I do like intersex omegas for much the same reason. I can wrap my brain around it. I know where the babies are coming from, and I'm not reading through a fic and trying to blank out the horror of some poor guy pushing a baby out of his ass

I'm not even opposed to anal knotting! I've read an alpha/alpha fic like that and an alpha/omega fic. If an asshole can take a fist with proper lube and stretching, it can take a knot, and I accept that. It's the self-lubricating and days of fucking during a heat that get me

Story development:

One thing I don't like about omegaverse is when it's used as an excuse to throw the ship into intense feelings and fucking without doing any of the work to show me why this ship works

(And I don't mean PWPs, there are some good omegaverse PWPs in the same way there are some good sex pollen ones, or aliens/gods/demons/fairies/magic made them do it)

BUT. You cannot have two characters who maybe didn't even like or know each other suddenly be in love because they shared a heat and rut and now they're mated. I just won't buy it, but I won't buy this in soulmate AUs or any other kind of fic, either

What happens after the heat/rut induced fucking? Are they stuck together because of a mating bite? Is this for societal reasons or because it physically hurts to leave, or both? Or do they separate immediately after? Is it weird when they meet again? How? Did they have a relationship before this? How does it change that? How does it change their relationship with other people, especially if this is in the pack bonds version of omegaverse?

Worldbuilding:

If it goes beyond a PWP, I do have questions

From an evolutionary standpoint, why are there alphas, betas, and omegas? Can betas have babies with each other, or are omegas the only ones who can get pregnant?

If betas are infertile, their evolutionary role could be to protect and provide for alphas and omegas when they would otherwise be vulnerable in heat/rut and when they're carrying and raising children

But if betas are infertile, why are there male and female betas?

If betas can have babies, it's possible that alphas and omegas have more babies and that there is an evolutionary tradeoff between that and between your heat/rut making you more vulnerable and the time and energy costs in having more children, which could lead to the two different modes of human reproduction

Either way......why does your society have a binary man/woman gender system rather than a ternary alpha/beta/omega gender system?

Possibly because you can't tell someone's designation by looking at them and because people hide their scent, and maybe also because most people are betas with alphas and omegas being in the minority

On a similar note, how common/rare are male omegas and female alphas? Have you basically reached a point where there is no sexual dimorphism? What is the reason for this?

Where did the terms alpha, beta, and omega even come from? They honestly sound really formal to me, and the one (1) omegaverse fic I wrote differentiated between these as more modern terms and the terms people used to use, which in modern times were more widely considered slurs

In conclusion, do I like omegaverse?

[bmpmp3]

So this weekend I'm just gonna go right into it, today we're talking about Toa's Patchwork Staccato (ツギハギスタッカート)!

A decade old classic, such a sweet sounding and uplifting piano-heavy instrumental that almost leans into the sound of a children's song game, a song that aurally really makes me want to play hopscotch outside LOL which contrasts beautifully with the lyrics and subject matter of the complicated and frustrated feelings of a shitty relationship, complete with ghosting and all!

I adore the instrumental work with all my heart, I'm a sucker for piano-led tunes so this is to be expect - but the vocals in the original are nothing to sneeze at either! VocaDB lists the vocals as Miku V2 Soft although I'm unsure if that's accurate, she sounds almost V3 Soft or Sweet to me, but there's hints of the V2 transition noise so I really couldn't tell either way. For a long time I didn't think much of the tuning, but looking at it closer now, 1) similar to sound design, unnoticed tuning is usually a mark of great tuning LOL but also 2) those throat clearing noises are unreal. How did Toa do that. How did they do that.

First cover I want to point out is a big one that doesn't need my help promoting it LOL the Project Sekai cover:

I've mentioned this before but I don't play the game because I'm bad with gacha games and it doesn't run on my phone, but I still follow the music despite not knowing the plot or characters because Fururin and Tomoriru voice characters in it LOL Love Live fans are insane like this, if you voice a character in that franchise there's a good chance I've ended up as a dedicated fan for life without either of us realizing it. You KNOW when they release a solo ver. album with the pink hair girl's versions I'll be all over that shit SHKFJKFSD

Anyway, I like this cover because the Fururin solos are fantastic (she's doing a character voice obvs but I'm a fan of both her natural voice and her skill at singing with character voices, she's very talented!) and the other singer is nice too, and despite the jank of the early Miku NT voice, I think it actually works really well in a song like this. Her weak and sort of wobbly tone helps for a song that keeps itself quiet and gentle, I think. Fun cover! Some of the instrumentation changes sound a little odd to me, maybe it's the mixing too, but overall I like it!

Another extremely popular cover that doesn't really need my introduction if the 2 million view count is any indication, but here is ePiaeon's version with all of Hatsune Miku's voicebanks!!

Iconic, it's just a really fun, well tuned piece that also serves as a great timeline and comparison between the sheer amount of voicebanks this blue anime girl has gotten over the past 15 years. This cover is from 2020, so Miku NT was still in beta and I don't think her appends (soft and whisper I think?) were out yet, but still thing it works great comparison-wise since Miku NT has been a bit MIA in the past three years anyway. When will NT return from the war... ANYWAY I love this thing, it made me really appreciate the V3 banks again especially, I love the tone of V3 Vivid!

This cover was so popular it started a very small trend of other's doing a similar bit with other vocal synths with multiple releases to this song, here's a few interesting ones:

Namine Ritsu version by rubeeish

Kasane Teto version by Teto Kasane-Chan

a Gekiyaku version by Akiroo

These UTAU ones can be so fun because there are a lot of UTAUloids who just have an absurd amount of voicebanks LOL probably because it's free and conducive to passion projects! Of course, Ritsu, Teto, and Gekiyaku all now either have or are getting commercial voicebanks in other software as well, but its wild how even just within one software we can have so many already, plus the sheer variety of them all! Gekiyaku's whisper bank is a standout to me, she genuinely sounds like she's whispering!! It's wild what UTAU can do.

There's plenty more out there, search up "all voicebanks patchwork staccato" on YT sometime and have some fun! And of course people do the same bit with different songs as well, ePiaeon also did a Melancholic cover with all the Len and Rin banks which is very fun:

I'm a sucker for a good product timeline what can I say!!!!!!!!! Maybe someday I should make an "all voicebanks" style cover of a certain favourite vocal synth character of mine too, a certain guy who's name rhymes with benbu... hmm...

Anyway, '"all voicebanks" cover tangent finished, back to the topic at hand - but this leads well into a cover I really enjoy: Omotelie's Genbu cover!

Just a really lovely and soft cover - one thing I've been really enjoying about Genbu specifically (although it's also audible in other standard-style SV banks too) is how when you turn up his breathiness and/or use his softer octaves/phoneme groups is how the program almost seems to like, double his voice in his aspirations, if that makes sense? It's more noticeable in his Lite and you can hear it clearest in his "ka" sounds and such, but it gives his voice this husky and sort of moody dimension I really enjoy. You know, I would love a full Genbu AI singing bank someday (we're getting close with Voicevox Humming!) but if that ever happens my pipedream would be them finding a way to mimic the raspy tone from his standard in like a vocal mode or an emotion style LOL

That's the funny thing about vocal synths, sometimes the so-bemoaned engine noise (and by engine noise I mostly mean audio artefacting and distortion as a result of the software's methods of resampling or reconstructing the voice) is a feature not a bug <3 Flower is a notable example, I quite like the 2.0 version of Ci Flower, but I do get why people prefer vFlower over her: she's still husky and a bit androgenous sounding in Cevio, but that extra husky-growly tone, flatter tone in the concatenative process of VOCALOID4 is just really unique and fun LOL sometimes engine noise is the noise you want, I guess!!

Anyway, engine noise sidetrack over, back to the very nice Genbu cover, I also wanted to mention that that I love the adlibbed harmonizing bits a lot, really fun and pleasant to listen to!

ANOTHER COVER I want to point out is this cover by the voice actor, singer, and I believe vtuber, Hazuki Saki (葉月さき)!

I knew them from her utaite days as Hazuki Yuu, if I remeber correctly her brother is the utaite Touyu? Lot of talent in these siblings LOL but I love her singing here, her voice is high but you can also hear this sort of deep nasal tone especially in the first verse and the chorus, it's like fuzzy and nasal but I wouldn't call it a full head voice nor a chest voice (<- not a musician, I am talking fully out my ass LOL) it's like... sound that feels near the sinuses and back of the teeth. This is a compliment. Am I making sense. I love voices and sounds. Anyway, very nice cover!

AND one last cover, I tend to keep the covers I listen to the most often for last and here's another one: 96Neko's (96猫) cover!

96Neko is a very popular utaite known for her sort of androgynous voice that, at the time when she started, often got slotted into a sort of "Len" type voice. We used to do that, describe utaite by what Cryptonloid they sound like HDGSKJHJDS Anyway, I really love her take on this song 'cause she uses both her higher range and her normal deeper ranger while also cramming so much emotion into these softer parts here and there... the way she says "mou iya da na" is wonderful, she uses bits of vocal fry here and there to make a real "singing" style sung performance... I am aware I am getting more incomprehensible by the second. To be honest I was holding back in the first few cover-remix weekends but I am going to talk about voices how I think about them now so watch out. I am going to get weirder. I prommy <3 Anyway, what I'm saying is, listen to this cover now!!!!!!! It's very lovely :)

That's all for tonight, partially because these were the main ones I wanted to talk about but also partially because I just discovered Tumblr has a 10 video per post limit. Future posts may be multiparters, watch out LOL anyway, thank u and goodnight! (you break up with me by phone and i die on impact)

[yusuke96universe]

DBZ Ultimate Timeline Suggestions

Hi! I just watched MasakoX’s The Alternate (& Ultimate?) Dragon Ball Z Canon video. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9G6Nb3CJS3o&t=1117s  And I remember thinking similar things like this back in the day before Super was a thing and even more so after supplemental materials such as Dragon Ball games, Heroes, spinoffs, etc intrigued me more than the cannon story for one reason or another. So this really got my thoughts going. 

So I made a list of suggestions for the team if they ever decided to make this into an multi-part series that smoothly transitions into one another. 

Start with OG Dragon Ball Movies

The first Dragon Ball movies also repackaged the main series like Z did and they already linked together pretty well and I always wanted to see this version of Dragon Ball continuity continue in some fashion and this would be a great opportunity for that, there is just a grey area to bridge the gap from classic to Z. This is untapped potential. So it is unnecessary to start with Z Movies. You can begin with the early movies. Movies 1-3 already work well enough, but they are missing the Red Rebbon Army and Chichi so Movie 1 could be substituted for movie 4 the Path to Power where the Red Ribbon Army is the main threat and acts as an introduction, then you can have 2, and 3 pick up from there. On the Upside we get a cooler intro to the cast, an obscure location of Chiaotzu's kingdom that can act as an interesting main base for the cast, and Tien is no longer a nomad living in solitude and could be a more active/regular character. Maybe even Tien/Launch get to have a Daughter. But the downside is that we never got a movie recapping the Piccolo Sagas, so Piccolo like Vegeta is also at risk of becoming Non-Cannon by your rules. That goes for Chichi to, but all you have to do is have the group enter the real World Martial Arts Tournament as teens and mix in a revenge plot basically make up an original story that would finish what those 3 movies started that recaps Piccolo’s Sagas. I understand why this might be a deal breaker.

Expansion past the Z movies

If you don’t want to adapt cannon movies; you can always expand on the Ultimate timeline with Supplemental material like from Dragon Ball Heroes and games. Exploring Demon characters, Hearts' crew, Xeno counterparts, Yamcha's Glass Clan tsundere girlfriend 

If done, I recommend using the Heroes manga for reference over the anime because it feels like they at least put more effort into it even if it’s rushed

Maybe include Shallot and Giblet from Dragon Ball Legends. The descendants of the SSG might be interesting if paired with Cumber's character. If you do adapt the Super Heroes manga; cannon characters like Frieza and Cell would need replacements after all, but there is no shortage in that department. 

If you choose to continue into Super's timeline you could avoid the anime's events and go with the Manga cannon to be different from your usual What Ifs or you could focus strictly on the Super movies. 

You can also bring in Ova Specials such as Yo Son Goku and His Friends Return (2008), either version of Plan to Eradicate the Saiyans. This would be a good means to introduce Tuffle related characters beyond Hatchiyack such as Baby and other Machine Mutants. Or Kamen and Oren who resemble him. This could even be a means to differentiate the Xeno characters from the Ultimate Timeline, to having a GT like timeline where some threats are substituted/ added or subtracted off. 

Mixing the characters and arcs together 

With ALL of these scientists and various mechanical opponents that have various opportunities to be upgraded could bleed into each other's stories more.

 -Androids 13, 14, and 15 gaining regenerative abilities from the Big Gete Star's remains. So they could be even more like Cell. Also, lean into the Dub talk of free will being overrated for 13's character. If Super 13 managed to kill Goku like Cell, he would lose his purpose, and then you could develop his character more from there. Heck, when Future Trunks encounters 13, a cool moment would be Trunks having the perfect counter to his ideological questions. Maybe even forming an ally, after all his Father Turles was always good at making former enemies into allies. 

-World's Strongest tournament is a Golden opportunity to introduce Hercule into the story early on. His status as the most recent World Martial Arts Champion allows him to skip the preliminaries much like Roshi and these 2 could be paired up for most of the arc with some back and forth, maybe Bulma throws in a few verbal jabs as well. This also could present Dr-Wheelo a backer in the form of Hercule's enemy Jaguar which could tie Dr Wheelo directly into Bio Broly. 

 Dr. Wheelo could make a come back in his Heroes upgraded humanoid form after forming an alliance with Jaguar. Being the lead scientist to the Bio-Broly. He's already got the Bio-Men and as long as they see eye to eye, Jaguar wouldn't mind funding Wheelo's research into him gaining the Ultimate Body. Since the Z-Warriors are celebrities or at least some members are more well known than others. Dr W might have stronger Bio-Men based off of our Heroes, but after seeing Broly's rampage. He recognizes Broly as the Strongest specimen that he has longed for. Hence motivation for Bio-Broly to be the vessel for his mind to inhabit, but some meddling kids ruined his life's work and it ended in a horror movie level of failure. 

 -Android 21, Dr. Lychee, Janemba, even GT all were stories where previous villains return from the dead in mass. So to avoid repeat, you could mix and cherry pick these stories together for an extended arc with multiples twists and turns to keep the Heroes and Audience on their toes. 

The Heroes are fighting off the invasion of past adversaries when suddenly, 21's inhibiting waves shuts down both the invading forces and our Heroes at once. The upside is that Earth is safe, but the downside is that it forces her to recklessly speed up her plans forward becoming the wild card that is hunting both heroes and villains alike while they finish their feuds, but in a similar manner as FighterZ where everyone is capped around the same level.

Metal Cooler

Save Super SSJ + Spirit Bomb for another occasion like as a means in finishing off Metal Cooler since the original ending of over powering the Big Gete Star didn’t make since by the movie’s own logic, but channeling in pure energy from life sources all over and pumping it into the planet at break neck pace when it’s attempting to suck Goku dry would fit. Heck, maybe Turles could even suggest it, after his years of bleeding planets dry and experiencing a Spirit Bomb to the face.

Broly

I am unsure if Broly killing Goku is the right move thematically, but if it’s centered around everyone pushing beyond SSJ, and Broly being a relic of the past trying to make everyone accept being forever under his boot only for Gohan to truly transcend him in the end. It could work, especially with Goku passing on the torch to the future. I am just not fully sold on Broly being the guy to kill Goku, because Cell was the culmination of everything that came before him. Then again, Broly could represent the sheer savagery aspect of the Saiyan race both Goku and Gohan reject that Broly personifies. So it almost feels like fate in a way like Goku paved the path for Gohan to run the race he couldn’t do himself.

Bojack Unbound

Turles and Bojack are both Space Pirates. Have some fun with that. Heck, as much more of a smooth talker Turles can be than Vegeta, he could appeal to Bojack's sense of Adventure or offer him some thrills only Earth or another place in outer space he can provide as a tour guide. Turles might even be able to plant some seeds of rebellion into Bojack's crew and to form allies. 

Could be an opportunity to flesh out Kogu’s character. Since he is the only other Heran outside of Bojack to transform, I assume he is the 2nd strongest and as hedonistic and arrogant as he was, it wouldn’t be surprising if he started/ attempted a mutiny, maybe backed by Zangya who wanted out after being betrayed. Heck, maybe they both survive, but Kogu’s character can develop  after being influenced by Turles in some form or fashion. 

If Zangya is getting a redemption then have her gain her own Mountain Dew transformation like Bojack but have it take place as a means of character development, like she is rebelling or making a last stand. Zangya could also transform for Krillin's sake to in a later story. 

Fusion Reborn

Since Janemba is literally pure evil muck personified onto a teenage oni. When he absorbs a pure soul such as Gohan, that could actually taint his purity and give him some character traits making him less feral. We could actually work in that Shin Budokai Mob Boss Janemba persona hinted at. Or at least have unstoppable Rebellious Teen in place of 17 and 18. 

Heck maybe we could have Janemba go through some phases. Starting out like an unstoppable innocent Baby form, the Oni Teen gains some clarity after absorbing some pure souls, but still goes on a power trip like 17 and 18. Afterwards, toward the endgame Janemba's character makes another change due to a survival mode where the essence of the most recent Evil Soul's energy, specifically that of a Kingpin influences him making him more and more ruthless, sadistic, and calculating as time goes on. Truly acting like a Mob Boss. We could even use Black Janemba from Heroes as the last transformation. Or we could keep the 2 forms exclusively, just having the mindshift in the 2nd form.

Implementing GT

You could implement some GT characters/arcs into the Ultimate timeline like Tuffles replacing Cerulians as the anti-Saiyans. Or create a connection between the 2 races. 

Oren and Karmin exist as perfect substitute twins for 17/18 and Baby.

If you continue with Super Heroes manga then there are the Xeno counterparts that sort of represent GT to take into consideration. So you could have Ultimate timeline have one race and Xeno timeline have the other. Along with other odds and ends to flesh them both out.

Playing it fast and loose

This is the perfect breeding ground for rebooting 2-Dimensional movie villains if you want to. So feel free to take some liberties like have the group heading off to Planet Slug in hopes of a Namekian made some Dragon Balls as a Namek Saga substitute. Planet Slug is an ice planet and full of Demons as well. -Since Slug is pure evil and is basically King Piccolo, he could have had a split at some like him and a pure good counterpart like Kami could exist out there, heck, maybe that could even have reincarnated and have an inversed Piccolo Jr. as a potential character/ Dragon Ball maker. The Dragon might be inert or maybe this Namekian is imprisoned, but has hidden the last Dragon Ball away, maybe he is in hiding, biding his time to purify this Evil Planet as it's Guardian. 

Turles and Gohan

Maybe Gohan is partly why Turles heads to Earth, he is always on the scout for talent and a Saiyan child would be just another reason to visit Earth, especially since his Father is now dead and the boy is in need of Saiyan guidance. This being a more naive Gohan without his Father, without a tested bond with Mr Piccolo, and with no knowledge of his Saiyan heritage. Turles could potentially persuade Gohan into taking a shortcut to power and eating the Fruit of the Tree of Might. Like his Ancestors before would use others as stepping stones to their paths of power. So at least tempting him first before Goku can arrive can act as a test for what Gohan has already learned from his time with Goku and Piccolo. Then after rejecting that power and later Gohan's true untapped potential being the key to stopping Turles in Vegeta fashion would be a little more poetic because while he did embrace his Saiyan nature like Turles initially wanted, he also embraced his Earthling nature and protected everyone. This could change the nature of their relationship moving forward. (ps I like the idea that Piccolo doesn't officially start taking Gohan under his wing as his student until after Turles men are killed. Before he was just giving pointers, toughening Gohan up, planting seeds into his head that Chichi/Goku might not agree with, but most importantly Piccolo would be dabbling with/experimenting with Gohan's potential that he displayed against Garlic Jr. So the over all product is about the same, just out of order) 

Future Timeline

Androids 14 and 15 as characterized by the Dub likely would have a Gangsta Paradise style post apocalyptical world. So Future Trunks might've needed to adapt to that style of living in order to survive. It's interesting imagining how they would aimlessly destroy the Earth in a different manner than 17 and 18.

[avinaccia]

A Completely Objective and Logical Ranking of Every Hetalia Character Song

New character songs are dropping,  I have too much time on my hands, let’s go. 

Also here’s a Youtube playlist for the ~✨nostalgia✨~

Bring it on in the tags 

71. Ah Legendary Class⭐The Awesome Me Highway [Prussia]: Absolutely tearing it up on the drums and on the vocal cords alike (I pray for Atsushi Kousaka). Great for the memes. 

70.  Happy Thoughts Museum [???]: This is listed as an official song but I had literally never heard of the title. Then I listened to it and BAM! Smack back to 2013 watching the teasers for the show on Funimation. Not sure I’d count it as a character song though...

69. (Nice)  My Song that is written by me for me [Prussia]: Deafened me but I can appreciate the industrial grind.

68.  My House is...Quiet. ~With the Trolls~ [Norway]: I have never heard this song, nor can I find any version of it online. By default it goes here and I am so sorry Norge.

67.  Make a Wish to Santa♪ [Sealand]: The discordant notes and childish exuberance only serve to make this sound like a demonic plea to Santa to eliminate the singer’s enemies.

66.  Heaven and Hell on Earth [Rome]: Rome sounds like he’s been in the corner of a restroom. Extra points for the metal version, minus points for the fact that the beach scene was replayed like 1764 times.

65. Canada Complete Introduction [Canada]: Quiet af until Kumacheerio shows up and blows out your speakers. they did you dirty my darling 😔

64.  It’s Easy!!! [America]: I don't think any video of this has ever stayed up for more than 20 seconds. Sounds cool, but like I was listening to 20 different genres at once, someone make him calm down.

63.  Bù Zàiyì the Small Stuff ☆ [China]: I cannot for the life of me find the complete song anywhere, clips have a cool beat though

62.  Let's Boil Hot Water♪ [Italy]: Exactly what it says on the tin..though a bit too close to elevator music for my tastes.

61.  The Fragrance of Early Summer [Japan]: Very ‘from the books’ Japan-esque song

60.  Peace Sounds Nice…[Baltic Trio]: All well and good until the radio demon shows up

59.  W●D●C ~World Dancing~ [America]: How a song can sound like it’s from 4 different decades at once is beyond me

58.  Overflowing Passion [BFT]: This is just drunken karaoke and I have 0 clue what’s going on #iconicforallthewrongreasons

57. Ren●Ren●Renaissance♪ [Rome+Chibitalia]: Wholesome Grandpa with Grandson content - barring the fact that Italy sounds on the verge of a nervous breakdown and Rome has had too much wine.

56.  Roma Antiqua [Rome]: Similar energy to any one of China’s songs - there’s a part of the song where it sounds like he’s singing in the shower, and I will never not laugh at [CENSORED]

55.  Country From Where the Sun Rises, Zipangu [Japan]: Very chill, very Japan, but just meh for me.

54.  Moon Over Emei Shan [China]: Good message, okay song.

53.  My Friend [England]: What a mind palace you must have Mr. Kirkland

52.  With Love, from Iceland [Iceland]: Three words: Heavy. Metal. Puffin.

51.  Having Friends is Nice...♫ [Russia]: Russia is the cutest thing ever

50.  Mm. [Sweden]: Smooth transition from WWE Smackdown to shopping at IKEA.

49.  Why don’t you come over? ~Beyond the Northern Lights~ [Iceland]: I don’t want to be mean but...this does sound like the second closing theme to an anime whose first closing was much more popular (à la Soul Eater)

48. Gakuen☆Festa [Germany, Italy, Japan]: Sounds like a 60s song of the summer but oh dear their voices do not go together. Hella cute though.

47.  Wa! Wa!! World Ondo [Main Cast]: One time I travelled 10 hours in a coach bus with a bunch of teenagers to a city of note in my country, and the only souvenir I bought was the fucking PAINT IT WHITE DVD. Perfectly chaotic, UN ĐĕùX~~

46.  In the Bluebell Woods [England]: In the album cover for this song he’s holding a guitar but this is not a rock song. Still has ‘running through the hills’ levels of dramatism though.

45.  Poi Poi Poi♪ [Taiwan]: You’re telling me that Taiwan, someone whose has *ONE LINE* in Beautiful World (which is criminal tbh what kind of representation-) managed to get an eNTIRE CHARACTER SONG???????

44.  White Flame [Russia]: There’s something to be said for a song that is 3x the length of any Hetalia episode

43.  Ich liebe… [Germany]: Baking cakes for your friends has never been so wholesome.

42.  We Wish you a Merry Christmas [America, China, England, France, Russia]: Nice to see they’ve gotten their shit together since United Nations Sta-hmm.

41.  Ah, Worldwide à la mode [France]: Sounds like a Disney Princess song, hard not to picture France frolicking in a field of flowers.

40.  Che Bello! ~My House is the Greatest!⭐~ [Italy]: Would not be out of place in an advertisement for Sea World.

39.  May You Smile Today [Japan]: THE feel good song of the summer

38.  Let’s Look Behind the Rainbow [Italy]: I will protect you.

37.  I'm your HERO☆ [America]: “Anyone who’s sad or sullen will be arrested” did NOT age well.

36.  Mein Gott! [Prussia]: Alternating headphone effect at the beginning is cool, so is the confidence...the actual singing on the other hand...

35. Nihao⭐China [China]: Listen, all of China’s character songs are great, I just can’t vibe with this one like some of the others.

34.  Pechka ~Light My Heart~ [Russia]: I’m still having difficulty wrapping my head around the fact that this and Winter were released at the same time.

33.  Pukapuka⭐Vacation [Germany, Italy, Japan]: Seems just a bit too much like they’re running on a treadmill that’s picking up speed and trying to sing at the same time. Peppy.

32.  Santa Claus is Coming to Town [Germany, Italy, Japan]: This is unironically the best song sung by this trio; can only vibe with for two months out of the year though.

31.  Excuse Me, I Am Sorry [Japan]: Japan’s character traits speedrun. Gives me barbershop quartet vibes for some reason but is catchy as hell.

30.  The Story of Snow and Dreams [Russia]: A superhero anime opening in the making

29. England’s Evil Demon Summoning Song [England]: Sir that is not how you roast a marshmallow, don’t cut yourself on that edge.

28.  Moi Moi Sauna♪ [Finland]: Exactly the type of song you’d expect and it’s wonderful

27.  United Nations Star⭐ [America, China, England, France, Russia]: This isn’t as much of a song as it is a four minute struggle for everyone to sing without America yelling every 5 seconds...Like a particularly musical episode of Hetalia.

26.  Paris is Indeed Splendid [France]: Paris-pa-pa-pa-paris

25.  Absolutely Invincible British Gentleman [England]: Poppy, rocky, polka-dotty

24.  Vorwärts Marsch! [Germany]: To quote the comment section: “This sounds like a German version of I’ll Make a Man out of you.” There’s some truth to that.

23.  Hamburger Street [America]: The product of America’s rapper phase. 8/10 because he’s trying so hard and because I can unironically sing along to all of this.

22.  Hoi Sam☆Nice Guy [Hong Kong]: A song that would absolutely destroy the ankles of anyone in DDR.

21.  I Am German-Made [Germany]: There was once a version that had Germany and Prussia singing at the same time and it sounded positively demonic and Broadway could never

20.  La pasión no se detiene ~Unstoppable Passion~ [Spain]: Talented, brilliant, incredible, amazing, show-stopping...

19.  Fall in Love, Mademoiselle [France]: Sounds like it should be in Mozart Opera Rock, I have kiss kiss falled in love.

18. Embrace the Très Bien Moi [France]: This is the definition of SELF LOVE PEOPLE. 

17. Carrot and Stick [Belarus&Ukraine]: Absolutely DRIPPING in 2000s power ballad energy. The type of song that plays on repeat in the mind of the widow whose millionaire husband ‘mysteriously disappeared’ (and the only legit character song ever acknowledged by the anime)

16. C.B.C (Cowboyz Boot Camp) Vol. 1 [America]: AH MAH GAWWDDD

15. Winter [Russia]: Heavy metal fever dream and the perfect song for an angst-ridden teenager

14.  Seychelles Here ⭐ Vacation Island [Seychelles]: UN👏DER👏RA👏TED SONG👏OF 👏THE 👏SUM👏MER👏

13.  Nah, it will settle itself somehow [Romano]: One day I aspire to reach this level of chill

12.  Let’s Enjoy Today [England]: I will never not feel happy when listening to this.

11.  Einsamkeit [Germany]: Ludwig manages to air every single one of his worries about not being good enough compared to his friends and always being perceived as mean or uptight when he’s actually just a softie and now my heart hurts. 💔

10.  Aiyaa Four Thousand Years [China]: A very poignant and beautiful song about the passage of time and the inevitability of its passing; comparable to an ancient ballad complete with explosive crescendos and meaningful lyrics.

9.  Bon Bon Bon❤️C’est Bon C’est Bon! [France]: Peppy, cheerful, adorable, groundbreaking; has been my alarm tone for six years and I’ve yet to tire of it. 9/10 The moaning interspersed throughout has been an interesting wake-up call.

8.  Let’s Enjoy! Let’s Get Excited! Cheers! [Denmark]: This is on par with Everytime we Touch by Cascada in terms of rage potential unlocked (the good kind)

7.  Dream Journey [Japan]: Whoever’s playing the shakuhachi is absolutely KILLING IT. Dramatic, wonderful, great metaphors.

6.  Gourmet’s Heart Beginner Level [China]: Absolute banger, I’m a vegetarian but this would inspire me to eat shumai.

5.  Always with you...Nordic Five! [Nordic FIVVVVVEEEE]: Everyone harmonizes beautifully except for Denmark. Extremely catchy, number placement seemed appropriate. 

4.  Pub and GO! [England]: I love this trash man

3. Maji Kandou⭐Hong Kong Night [Hong Kong]: If you thought Denmark’s song was a banger JUST YOU WAIT. I WILL BLOW OUT MY SPEAKERS LISTENING TO LO-HA-SU.

2. Steady Rhythmus [Germany]: THIS SONG IS METAL AF. Seriously, if it can be classified as ‘hardcore’ by my father and his group of 50-somethings who have decided to single-handedly gatekeep the metal and hardrock genres, it can do anything.

1.  The Delicious Tomato Song 🍅 [Romano]: Beautiful, absolutely awe-inspiring, poignant, catchy lyrics with an extremely deep meaning that only years of meticulous research and analysis can unlock, Romano I love you.

BONUS: Closing Songs

5. Hatafutte Parade (World Series) 

4. Hetalian⭐Jet (The World Twinkle): The song is good, the dancing is cursed 

3. Chikyuu Marugoto Hug Shitainda (World⭐Stars)

2. Marukaite Chikyuu (Hetalia: Axis Powers): nE NE PaPA

1. Mawaru Chikyuu Rondo (The Beautiful World)

[mieux-de-se-taire]

The Black Parade - Part 2

This is part 2 of my song-by-song review of TBP. There will also be a third part shortly, and I’ll review the b-sides separately.

Welcome to the Black Parade - THE song, god, what can I say, this is the first MCR song I ever heard and I was immediately blown away, the fucking piano at the beginning, so simple yet haunting, an amazing melody that just sticks in your head, one of the most instantly recognizable song intros, beautiful and striking even before Gee starts singing, and then when he does, jesus christ, I get chills, I can feel it in my bones, there are emotions I can only access when listening this song, god, and then it builds so gradually and grandly with the drums and the bass, and then it comes in at full grandiose force at 1:04, and Gee starts screaming the same words he just sang so sweetly and vulnerably, fuck, and the transition at 1:47, the drums, and the complete tempo change and tone shift, exquisite, and it’s so unexpectedly catchy while still beautiful and emotional and empowering, and the lyrics, my god, so simultaneously dark and reassuring, this song feels like kneeling in darkness and looking upwards into the light, god, my favorite part (aside from the beginning and the fun little guitar riff at 2:46) is at 3:32-4:04 and then 4:27, just the lines “Do or die / You’ll never make me / because the world / will never take my heart / Go and try / you’ll never break me” absolutely kill me, god, this is a religious experience, this is an anthem, this changed my life. The backstory behind the song makes it all the more interesting: “Originally entitled ‘The Five of Us Are Dying’, and sketched out as early as sessions for the first album, it had evolved to the extent that only the verse survived. It went through revision after revision in the studio, a painstaking process of trial and error. Singing it, Gerard felt he was close to complete breakdown. ‘It felt like the pressure was tearing us up,’ he said. ‘It was the hardest song on the record to make. I was going through some very difficult personal things. I was literally going through them as we were tracking the song. Originally it was sort of a plea for help’” (The True Lives of My Chemical Romance, 153). You can check out a rough mix of that original version here. I also found the origins of the piano intro fascinating: ‘For the intro to the album we had this original idea that you would hear a parade coming down the street,’ says Cavallo. ‘You’d first hear it in the distance then, as it got closer, you’d hear it getting louder and louder...then it would get quieter after it passes you by...the guys asked me to play the piano to give them an arc of this parade idea. So I started with those piano notes...then I harmonized it high up the keyboard, then I made it louder and louder until I was playing it Rachmaninoff style. The whole piano was screaming and then I worked it back down to being quiet. It lasted three or four minutes’...On his return, he discovered a slightly sheepish band. ‘Er...we fucked with your piano. We didn’t want to use it for something that was going to be an interstitial piece...We used the first half and stuck it onto this song called “Welcome to the Black Parade”’...Cavallo was stunned when he heard what they had done. He turned back to the band and said, simply, ‘Oh my God! You guys! This is the greatest thing I’ve ever heard!’” (The True Lives of My Chemical Romance, 160-161). Then of course there’s the music video, which is just a cinematic masterpiece and one of the best music videos ever. The making of video is also really cool, and I highly recommend checking it out--their reactions to the set at 1:34, Mikey at 5:03, the visual effects explanation at 11:20--it’s great (also, 2:17, help, what are you doing). The outtake version is also pretty interesting (check out 15:20 and 16:17). Additionally, if you want a more in-depth analysis, 12tone made a really cool video that goes more into the music theory side of things. There’s also the Kevin Smith Podcast where Gerard and Mikey go through the entire song from 36:32-1:57:36. They get off track a lot, and it’s a long video, so some highlights are 36:32, 41:19, 49:44, 51:39, 54:11, 56:02, 57:10, 1:01:39, 1:05:08, 1:07:04, 1:12:45, 1:16:44, 1:25:44, 1:38:43, 1:44:37, 1:45:26, 1:54:56, and 1:57:10, but it’s all fascinating.

I Don’t Love You - one of the more understated songs on the album, interestingly following the intense and dramatic WTTBP, but it works somehow, fairly simple but incredibly effective, one of the most honest and direct tracks on TBP, my favorite part is the quiet yet pained way Gee sings at 3:06-3:22, like he’s physically holding himself back from crying or screaming, it’s beautiful and tragic and very raw and personal, this song also has some of the most cutting lyrics on the album, I mean “When after all this time that you still owe / You’re still a good-for-nothing I don’t know,” “And after all the blood that you still owe / Another dollar’s just another blow,” “When you go / would you have the guts to say / ‘I don't love you / like I loved you yesterday,’” god it’s so vulnerable and heartfelt. From my understanding, the song is at least partially about one of Gee’s past relationships, but within the concept it’s just as heartbreaking. There’s also the much forgotten about music video, which is really weird and has some absolutely terrifying mid-2000s cgi, but I do really like how the guitars start exploding at 3:23. Also, check out the outtakes version for some interesting facial expressions, very genuine and expressive performances, and really fun slow mo shots (10:27-11:45 holy shit)

House of Wolves - this song took the longest for me to warm up to on TBP and I almost didn't include it on my MCR playlist, but then I listened to it half a dozen more times and it started to click, such a fun and cathartic song, I love the transition at 0:59-1:07 with the whispers of “s i n” and the guitar runs in the background, I also really like the intro with the weird whiny guitars transitioning to a harder more aggressive sound, my favorite part is at 1:53 when Gee sings “You better run like the devil cause they’re never gonna leave you alone” because I love how the guitars fall away to highlight the line, also the guitar part at 2:29-2:47 when he’s singing “Tell me I’m a bad, bad, bad, bad man” goes so hard, overall a really solid song with great energy and anger without being as theatrical as others. Somewhat unsurprisingly, it was started by Frank: “‘House of Wolves’, and its lolloping jungle-blues kick, came from a dead day at The Paramour in the wake of Mikey’s departure when only Frank was interested in playing. He borrowed one of the library of guitars that Cavallo had brought into the studio – in this case, a giant red acoustic – and simply started playing something he thought his dad might like” (The True Lives of My Chemical Romance, 161).

Cancer - this goddamn song, fuck, one of the most painful MCR songs to listen to, so quiet and simple in contrast to the aggression and theatricality of most of the record, but it still stands out, and god, the lyrics “Now turn away / cause I’m awful just to see / Cause all my hairs abandoned all my body / all my agony / Know that I will never marry,” I get chills every time I hear it, sometimes I have to skip this song when listening to TBP because I can’t handle listening to it, it’s just such a gut punch, Frank is so right, and Gee’s vocal performances, especially live, god, Mexico, Bonn, it’s so just so direct and raw and desperate, it’s haunting, my favorite part has to be the ending starting at 1:42, I wish I could listen to it more since it’s so beautiful. Its inception is also very interesting: “Ray said his fingers were determined to find patterns and notes he wouldn’t normally play until, instinctively, he knew it was a song that needed a piano rather than a guitar. The following day, Gerard was waiting for Cavallo...‘[Gerard] sang, I played the piano and it was written...He directed me, told me what sort of chords to play and, all of a sudden, my fingers were doing the talking. I had no idea what the fuck I was doing and “Cancer” came out eight minutes later. The engineer showed up half an hour later and we recorded it. Done.’ It was a song that struck the entire band...and became almost too hard for My Chemical Romance to listen back to. Ray, who played bass on the song, found it difficult. He was worried it might upset people, so stark were its tones, and fretted for a few days as to whether they should include it. He talked to a friend who had been affected by cancer and that person eased his worries, saying it might act as a tribute to those who had died from the disease” (The True Lives of My Chemical Romance, 159-160)

Mama - the second MCR song I ever heard and one of my all time favorites, holy shit, everything about this song, from the opening bouncy guitar riff with explosions in the background to the sobbing at the end, Jesus fucking christ the guitars in this song, Ray Toro you are an actual genius, I mean the chorus at 0:57-1:18, and then the build at 2:39 that leads to the breakdown at 2:57-3:23, fuck fuck fuck, I’m going to kill someone, and then the lyrics god “Mama, we’re all full of lies / Mama, we’re meant for the flies,” “Well mother what the war did to my legs and to my tongue / You should’ve raised a baby girl / I should’ve been a better son / If you could coddle the infection / they can amputate at once / You should’ve been / I could have been a better son,” “She said ‘You ain’t no son of mine’ / For what you’ve done they’re gonna find / a place for you / and just you mind your manners when you go / And when you go / don’t return to me, my love,” “But the shit that I’ve done with this fuck of a gun / You would cry out your eyes all along,” clawing my heart out, why did you write this, and the fucking screaming, 2:55, 4:14, god everything about his vocal delivery in this song, the lilt in his voice when he sings “I’m writing this letter and wishing you well” at 0:30 and “I’d hate to see you cry” at 0:50, the way he wails and howls “mama” at 3:03-3:26, and then Liza Minelli of all people at 3:27-3:34, and it works so brilliantly, really solidifying the kind of old timey feel, and then the switch back to Gee with the hardest line in the whole song, followed by a whole chorus of voices at 3:43, god, this fucking song, the way it builds all the way through to 2:57, gives a short reprieve via the Liza Minelli bridge, and then comes back full force at 3:35, and then the ending, the unhinged screaming at 4:14 to the sobbing to the simple circusy melody, I love it so much, my favorite part has to be 2:54-3:26, my eyes are literally rolling back in my skull, I want to carve it into my bones. And this masterpiece came into existence because someone bet against guitar god Ray Toro: “Early in the writing sessions, Ray had been bet that he couldn’t write a polka – the Eastern European, oompah-ish folk dance. Building on the cabaret of Revenge’s ‘You Know What They Do to Guys Like Us in Prison’, Ray began to piece together his Russian dance while Gerard worked on a melody with the aim of creating something cinematic and fun. It would become ‘Mama’, one of their third album’s key tracks: flamboyant, over-the-top, camp and wildly original. It was the song that told the band they could take their music anywhere they wanted – even if it was ‘batshit crazy’” (The True Lives of My Chemical Romance, 139). Also interesting is how Liza Minelli ended up singing on it: “Gerard had slipped into character on the song, singing in female voices as he sought to bring Mother War to life, but felt his efforts weren’t quite working. He had been warming up for his vocal takes by attempting an over-the-top impression of the Broadway singer Judy Garland, and so when Cavallo and his engineer Doug McKean asked what he was striving for on ‘Mama’, he said it needed her daughter Liza Minnelli to guest on it. He was not being entirely serious. So he was surprised to see Cavallo pick up a phone...In just a few moments, the producer had convinced her to sing on the album – something which delighted the band. ‘The reason Liza Minnelli ended up on Black Parade was because I was thinking about who my grandmother would have wanted on it,’ said Gerard” (The True Lives of My Chemical Romance, 161).

Sorry this post got so long, especially WTTBP and Mama, I had a lot I wanted to get out. Also, listening to such emotionally intense songs on repeat while I try to write about them is really draining, WTTBP almost took me out. The next part will also probably be difficult to do, so it might take me a bit. However, I’m still enjoying going through MCR’s discography and taking the time to really focus on things that I usually just listen to casually. Feel free to share your own thoughts and opinions.

And happy early birthday to Bullets, which was released 20 years ago on 7/23/02!

[stuckasmain]

Buffy the vampire slayer season 2 review

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Huge! Major! Mondo! Serious spoilage here people! Keep if you haven’t seen season 2 and don’t want to be spoiled, jump off now. You’ve been warned

✨𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐥 ✨

literally no one gave them the right for half the episodes in this season and I’ll single handedly fight whoever made me feel like this. So clearly the show was picked up after the first season as it launches straight from 12 episodes to 22. Honestly I love It so far and still do- also spike. Y’all were right he’s great. Just.... just who allowed you to do that finale she’s 17 let her watch crappy movies or something.

[IMG=O3A]

seriously I like just finished and I’m still not ok

𝐒𝐭𝗼𝐫𝐲 𝐩𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐬 𝐮𝐩! 𝐁𝐮𝐭 𝐝𝗼𝐞𝐬𝐧𝐭!

SLIGHTLY more vampires then season one! This was my more major complaint of season one , but with more episodes they could pace out the story driven - I don’t want to say ‘main plot’ episodes. There’s a equal mix of vampire slayage and ‘living on a hellmouth’ activity’s. I kinda like how you’ll have your more goofy monster of the month episodes then WHAM. Vampires! Emotions! Death! Straight in the gut. However at the same time it feels like it sort of drags a bit. Like everyone’s stuck in this sort of loop of development just like the world. Learn a lesson or evolve as a charecter or some sort of word thing? Next episode it’s kinda ignored and that flaw is back again.

however I am completely LIVING for the Halloween episode.

𝐂𝗼𝗺𝐞𝐝𝐲

Still god tier , next. Ok but seriously I feel it got even better this season and I love it.

Nothing will EVER be funnier then beating a unstoppable demon with a god damn bazooka and a pissed off teenager

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬

Buffy summers-

Someone get this girl a hug I swear to god she’s been though it. As much as I adore her and think she’s funny and smart , though cocky , but at the same time she suffers from the development issue I said before. Like she learns a lesson then next episode jumps straight back into the same sort of thing. However this is no fault on her and mainly just proves she has a good heart. I mean if my principle was like that and my own mother was so quick to believe I GENUINELY KILLED SOMEONE/TRIED TO without listening to a single word of mine. I’d loose it sometimes too.

Xander-

Again he’s still my soul. No porn star t-shirt this time :( . Again he’s just he’s funny, he’s awkward but his hearts in the right place. He really is a human puppy dog, who’s more bark then bite too. I also love the detail of him remembering all the military stuff from Halloween but also the “I was a hyena once I can relate to the werewolf :D” I love hyena boy. Also low key self deprecating half the time.

Willow-

Baby angel. Nerd queen. Love her so much omg. I love how sweet she is but also how at the same time she’s decently tough, and then gets all excited when she acts tough. Seriously she’s so adorable I may burst.

Giles-

Also my soul. Father figure of the year. Also, I like how this season began hinting at something deeper then what meets the nerdy nerdy surface. He’s kinda like willow a sweet and awkward nerd however he WILL snap much more often then she will.

Oz-

SETH GREEN! That’s it. Seth green! I love him so much oz is such a sweetheart, though it is kinda like willow dating a male, werewolf, version of herself. Though I’m here for it.

Cordillera -

How she is both developed and the same at the same time. I love her lmao.

Angel-

How do you go from Edward Cullen to dork to evil boy to sad boy. Apparently don’t have sex because you’ll be happy and turn evil kids. Really... who put that into the curse? Ok so yeah on one hand he’s no longer suffering so why have him cursed, at the same time it opens up the chance for him to do the same thing you fucking cursed him for again! Seriously evil him is both entertaining as it is a very punchable face.

Spike-

The guy pulls up looking like that, to that music. I swear it was like Billy Hargrove like a instant “well there going to be good” (as in interesting charecter-) and it was right. I love how he just shows up and is all “ok, what do you do for fun around here” .... “you people have heard of fun here right? Jesus Christ- what do you do? Skeam all day?” Later half after the mid part of the season he sort of Meh’s. However his sarcasm is p e a k.

Dru-

I love her you don’t understand. She’s so creepy and cute , evil and yet understandable. You both feel sympathetic but also worried over what she’s going to try.

𝐑𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝗼𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩𝐬!

the show kicked off and everyone’s dating!

Buffy and angel-

Cute , until it wasn’t. Honestly I like how they got over the tragedy early in the seasons an just got to dating like good god. Honestly they’re cute, somehow Constant make outs and being overly protective works. Then he , you know... goes evil after her - god that’s. That’s one way. I felt so bad for her Jesus. Also the last few minutes when he gets his soul back and he- and she- yeah.

Xander and cordillera-

I’m acting loving their relationship. Something about non stop bickering lead me to think it’d happen. And it did exactly as I thought it would(also nothing will be funnier the Transition of them sliding down in the closet and it cuts to sex Ed class. Nothing will ever be funnier. I am a 2 year old leave me alone.)

Willow and oz-

They’re so cute I’m going to burst I swear. Sweet dorks in love I cannot Handle it I can’t . I love them so much.

Giles and ms calendar-

*Muffled sobbing*

Spike and Dru-

LIVING. I love them. Again, creepy and cute. You don’t need the whole soul thing to have feelings you know? I can’t get over the demon calling them out on loving each other and spike looking so offended.

Ps.

The flashbacks in the last two episodes were great. I demand more. (Also Angels accent and ponytail will kill me im sure of it) just yes.

[dooptown]

S2 Finale

for once i’m actually going to watch the episode again and get my thoughts down as i do cuz holy hell was this well done, i think

“Comet” playing first instead of the OP was brilliant. Also, as a note, the full music video of that came out, along with some killer animation inspired by the manga.

A detail i love about this music video is Ibuki spotting Free’s motorcycle light in the side mirror before he stops the car and, well, yeah

They actually show Louis reaching for his gun pretty early on into Ibuki’s monologue. I don’t think the manga showed that, but I could be wrong. He definitely has it pointed to him when it’s pitch black same at the anime, but the fact he reaches for it so early means he obviously knows what’s going on, even if he couldn’t pull the trigger.

predictably, the anime does the “darkness” as it always has, with the dark-blue background and bright lines for the characters. The Comet music video does this part of the scene better imo, but it’s not too much of an issue. Free’s whole bit is obviously rushed, and I think the anime suffers for that, but i understand that they couldn’t fit it in. We do miss him escorting Louis out of the BAM though, and also saying he’ll eat Louis if he comes back. That said, I don’t know how Louis gets back...I guess Free drives him back still but we just don’t see it

The Riz and Legosi fight has Riz getting the idea of eating Legosi in his head now that was seemingly missing before. In the manga he was thinking about how he’d become friends with Legosi by eating him, and that never came up in the anime until kinda now. Like I said before it’s an interesting part of Riz’s character so i’m glad it’s touched on a bit at least.

The moth scene is just as confusing here as it was in the manga...and without explanation or confirmation that it’s imaginary chimera (a part of the manga plot that was completely dropped), it just seems like...something. We don’t have Moth-san talking to Riz here or him questioning what he’s seeing so...it could be seen as purely metaphorical but it still remains a mystery (and just like in the manga it accomplishes nothing here cuz Riz just gets up and wails on Legosi) It looks fucking cool though! Word of Power: Respect for Life! It’s all one shot here, so we see every wound inflicted on Legosi, which is only a few slams. In the manga it’s implied he endured way more. That just follows the pattern of the anime, though, where violence is toned way the hell down. I’m not complaining, though. I don’t want to see Legosi hurt...

I knew what i was seeing when it was in motion, but damn does it look fucking good! Orange really is showing how to do CG right by properly stretching models for intense movements and actions! They’ve done this subtly before but here it’s very clear, but not distractedly so (unless you pause frame by frame) However, I still do think the models look a bit stiff when just...like...walking normally sometimes. Like we have this great fight animation but then Riz picks Legosi up and drags him a bit and he looks...off. Ah well

The whole bit about Legosi exposing his stomach doesn’t have the subtleties explained here...and really the anime leaves out a lot of character thinking but i think if they left it in it’d be a bit too hammy and crowded, so it’s fine that they cut it out. But still...tell me more pose isn’t as funny here :(

Legosi’s voice acting shines again here. He sounds really fucking hurt...

The moon cut and then them laying together is nice. Also i do like how there hasn’t been music up until this point at all. Riz talking about everything is nice too...I don’t remember him saying he feels like he could cry in the manga, due to him not remembering anything about Tem but his taste.

Legosi says: “I almost went through the same thing Riz did. If someone hadn’t snapped me out of it, my love for Haru might have made me eat her.” I recall he says something similar in the manga too...but like the only time he ever got close to eating her is when he didn’t know who she was. It really doesn’t seem like the same thing at all...it ties back into Legosi really seeming to have a really firm grasp on everything, all things considered, and he’s just selling himself short. I guess he could also be talking generally but really, he never had a moment where he wanted to eat her again after that first night. And the “someone” who snapped him out of it...Zoe???? Like, I’m just a bit puzzled on this part. I think what it really is is a reference to what he says to Louis later, how he’s the one that guided him and ensured that he is the way he is. Ensured that he did so well to begin with. Like, writing it out like that makes sense, but I guess I’m taking the words too literally.

Anyway, was typing my thoughts out there. I don’t think it’s entirely clear that Louis’s influence is what caused Legosi not to eat Haru after they started spending time together, but if Legosi says that’s what it was, that’s what it was. I felt that Louis’s guidance for Legosi was more about him accepting himself as a carnivore and using his abilities for what he believes in instead of thinking he can only do harm with them...not about controlling his meat eating instincts. I guess it kinda goes hand in hand. Anyway

The hand touch is, well, touching like it was in the manga, however Riz firmly regrasping Legosi’s hand to hoist him up and continue fighting and Legosi sounding surprised isn’t what i pictured. In the manga i saw it more as Riz slowly doing it and Legosi just being too weak to do anything about it. Riz has the advantage, so he can afford to make the action slow and deliberate

Ok here’s where things get interesting. Louis’s appearance is entirely different in the anime, whereas in the manga he appears behind Riz while Legosi is talking to him, with Legosi spotting him and using a distraction to escape with him. HERE!!! Louis actively stops Riz from attacking Legosi again, clearly out of breath as he ran all the way there, but he still has the mind to appear cool and collected and make a lil quip that pisses Riz off. And then when Riz charges him Louis is just walking calmly toward him like!

Like yeah, he does stop and react a bit, but he sees Legosi coming up to stop him so I suppose that’s why he stands his ground (honestly though was he gonna pull his gun? Did he have a plan? I feel like he just got there without one, which makes sense. He just had to stop what was happening no matter what)

And Legosi ragdolls Riz aside to protect Louis. Love wins

Pina scene is the same here. Although previously we didn’t get his thoughts about how he never wanted to get involved with carnivores ever again cuz of these two, but that ties into the whole “anime doesn’t say every single thought that’s in a character’s head like in the manga” thing. I think it’s interesting that they even bother showing him retrieving his phone from the trash bin, since he could have easily just got it from his pocket but it shows that Riz was smart enough to take it away from him (but not smart enough to destroy it or chuck it somewhere or hide it where Pina couldn’t see)

The next scene with Legosi and Louis up on the outcropping..Legosi mentions how this is his last New Year’s. He’s more convinced he’s gonna die than it seems in the manga (although depends on the subs i guess) The part where Riz is looking up while Legosi is talking about their fight to Louis...i never knew if he was supposed to be hearing that or not, here or in the manga. I guess it’s up to interpretation.

Legosi delivering this line in the manga: determined, stoic

Legosi delivering this line in the anime: clearly in love

we finally get one of these scenes for Louis! Season 1 had a few of these for Legosi and Haru when they had moments where they were deep in thought about the other. I thought that Louis’s would have been in his initial meetup with Legosi in the manga, but that scene got cut. It’s cool that they put his here, though! Also correct me if I’m wrong but I think this is the only shot like this in season 2

When Louis’s theme starts here when he’s acting strong, trying not to cry, I thought it’d slowly start to break down as he did and transition into a new track but it just kinda...keeps going. It sounds like a more somber, shaky version at the very least but I think the music at this part is a bit lacking...thankfully the animation and Louis’s voice acting more than make up for it

Boy, does Louis really cry. I’m glad they let him let loose like that but the bad thing about seeing it animated is...they don’t hug! I always wanted a hug here...one that Louis fully embraces unlike the earlier one on the balcony. It makes sense the Legosi doesn’t try to do anything and is taken aback, of course, but damn...and considering how Louis is treated later and at the end of the series...it stings a lot

Idk what to say about this scene...it’s done so well. Louis having his internal monologue, talking to Legosi...Legosi looking so damn guilty that he wants to go back and fight...the transition to the foot reveal...it’s all so good

A change here in the anime...Louis is a lot more steadfast. He offers his foot and is like, completely at peace with it. In the manga he’s still shaking and his expressions are like, more unsure, but here he seems a lot more convinced that it’s what he has to do

jeez

Legosi’s thoughts about how eating his leg feels almost ritualistic and it actually makes him desire and hunger for it is gone...which like, idk why it is. We just hear Legosi say that he wants to but we don’t feel it (we do see his lips pull back and reveal his teeth tho)

Enter: Buffgosi. This happens in the manga but since Legosi’s model is so much smaller in the anime it seems like a much more drastic difference.

intimate...

Legosi doesn’t apologize for not being able to stop growling, but it seems like they did a lot to remove any humor Paru put into these scenes. I guess it doesn’t work that well in one continuous scene vs. chapters broken up by weeks

Louis’s funny deadpool moment is changed with him just...telling Legosi to be a hero again. Guess he really likes that line. The way it’s delivered really feels like a video game, like Legosi is recovering from a hit and Louis pops in to heal him with some words

Seriously, Louis just keeps making this face...after an entire season of being super serious and stone faced he’s looking softer

the Riz and Tem story isn’t changed at all, and can still be read as either romantic or platonic. Seeing it in motion makes it hit harder though, for sure

Legosi still wishes Riz a happy new year here. He seems a lot happier here than in the manga. Also Louis doesn’t berate him for it, instead opting to speak up and talk to Riz here after hearing about his heartbreak. He does it without the pressure of the cops being there, and it truly shows that he really does like carnivores and sympathizes with their struggles now.

Yeah, so the cop scene is gone, which kinda condenses and cuts out a lot (including Pina’s small appearance) but I kinda like it better. It allows all the characters to breathe. Legosi thanks Louis naturally for the meal, and Louis telling Legosi to wipe his face is done in a friendly, joking manner...it just all feels a lot softer and friendlier without the cops being there making it all fucked. Just like in real life

THERE IT IS THERE IT FUCKING IS THEY EVEN GAVE LOUIS HIS LIL SMIRK AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

god i keep tearing up around these parts IT’S BEEN ALMOST 2 HOURS SINCE I STARTED MAKING THIS POST GOOD FUCKING LORD

I kinda thought they might put the aftermath in a sort of credits scene, and i think it works, even if it does pave over some important stuff

god it’s just so validating to see Legosi care for Louis and Haru equally. Like we all know it’s the case but they’re both dear to him

Now this is a far departure from his thoughts in the manga. I suppose it only fits with the ending of the season to make it more optimistic, but we skip the while “you can’t marry an herbivore cuz of your record” thing...but here he still cherishes it in a way. Very interesting. Wonder if they’ll backpedal on it in season 3

Legosi actually tells Haru he’s dropping out here too! He still does in the manga but it seems more abrupt there, like he already did drop out and then goes to tell her instead of telling her before he does. He’s also not suffering through his meat withdrawal here like he was in the manga at this scene (or at least the manga’s counterpart at Haru’s house)

The ending convo mirrors what Haru says to him in that scene too. It’s a funny way to leave off on the season without a stinger or anything. It just kinda makes the audience question their relationship (and now that Lougosi is pumping through everyone’s veins...hehehhehehe)

uh, well, anyway, i kinda wasted all of my time off after work writing this so...i hope you enjoyed it? Not gonna get one of these for a while...i know at least some of you like them

Also...what the hell was the extra “broadcast only” scene??????

Well, anyway, I hope you all have a good day, night, whatever, wherever you are. And remember: Legosi and Louis are in love

[jazsplaylist]

FAVORITE SONGS OF 2021: PART IIII / LAST PART

We are wrapping up the hot mess that is my favorite songs of 2021!

These songs are purely based on how much I’ve personally enjoyed them and listened to them, not necessarily objective quality or critical acclaim. This is purely the fact that I just vibe with them.

THIS IS TOP TEN BABYYYYYYY!

#10: Billie Bossa Nova - Billie Eilish

This song is just so pretty. Billie was truly meant to sing these lounge jazzy type songs - her voice is perfect for sensual, quiet and romantic songs like this one. Is it bad that I want a full album with this vibe?

Favorite lyrics: “Nobody saw me in the lobby / Nobody saw me in your arms”

#9: Tipsy - Spotify Singles - Chloe x Halle

I feel like I sort of cheated (again). No, but I genuinely prefer this a lot over the original arrangement. The production is less noisy and cleaner, but it’s still interesting because it brings a different vibe. Their vocals are also a lot pleasant as they went for a more “pretty” approach of singing, compared to the album version where they’re singing a bit more off-pitch and “sloppily” to emphasize the “tipsy” part. I love that they can always find something new with their songs and play around with it, which is why I think this song deserves to be highlighted. Also, don’t we all just love songs about murdering men???

Favorite lyrics: “And I don't give no apologies / If you lose a life, that's not on me”

#8: Angel Baby - Troye Sivan

Even though this came out sometime during fall, I didn’t discover this until early December. But you better believe when I started listening to it, I made up for those months I lost. I can’t remember a day that has gone by where I haven’t listened to this less than five times a day. I can’t fully grasp why I got so quickly attached to it, but the initial feeling I got was that it feels like the kind of song I would bawl my eyes to at age 5. It’s very specific, but one of the things I remember about me as a young child was listening to certain songs and wanting to cry even though I didn’t know what they meant. I definitely did not understand English at that age, so I wouldn’t have understood this song if I heard it then. Whatever this song has, it makes my inner child cry.

Favorite lyrics: “Started giving up on the word "forever" / Until you gave up heaven so we could be together”

#7: Deserve You - Justin Bieber

Okay, this might be one of the best Bieber songs yet. This song is honestly close to pop perfection and I don’t understand you if you don’t agree. The drums transition to the chorus? Definitely on the list of best 2 seconds of pop music in 2021. Is it also a coincidence that the best tracks on this album are co-written by Jon Bellion? No.

Favorite lyrics: “I'm on my ten thousandth life / Nine thousand nine hundred nine and it slipped my hands / But this the one I'm not giving up”

#6: voodoo voodoo - iris & SKAAR

The best Norwegian collab of 2021, and I knew it couldn’t be topped when it came out in January. Who knew that a witchy, ethereal, spooky bop was what 2021 needed? Highly slept on song by two amazing artists - how does this song only have 200k streams? I’m mad.

Favorite lyrics: “But don't worry, I'm a good girl, really (really?) / Just playing, I'm the reason you'll need therapy, baby”

#5: Leave The Door Open - Silk Sonic

The world got a whole lot better when Bruno Mars and Anderson .Paak decided to release this. I’m really happy that Bruno Mars decided to continue doing retro R&B, soul/funk type of music, but I’m happier he decided to do it with Anderson .Paak. They’re truly a golden duo meant to make music together, and I really, really hope this isn’t the first and last time we see a collaboration between them. 

Favorite lyrics: “I'm talking kissing, cuddling / Rose petals in the bathtub / Girl, let's jump in, it's bubbling”

#4: Until The Night Falls - Hedda Mae

I’m so weak for the Y2K vibe, but I’m realizing that I think I prefer songs that sound like Y2K songs and made within the past 3-4 years more than songs that actually were made in that era. This song makes me so nostalgic for the kind of music I didn’t know I was nostalgic over. It reminds me a lot of pop music we heard from Norwegian and other Scandinavian artists in the early 2000s, because there was a specific way they created melodies back then. And the chorus melody is like??? The best ever??

Favorite lyrics: “So I'm keeping my head cold / I'll be okay until night falls / But then I'll go over it again”

#3: Kiss Me More (feat. SZA) - Doja Cat

This, along with “Leave The Door Open”, was my most played song of 2021. It just hits all the spots. SZA’s verse is amazing, Doja sounds great and it’s a super fun and playful track. I don’t think I need to say anything more than that, because everyone knows how great this song is.

Favorite lyrics: “I, I feel like fuckin' somethin' / But we could be corny, fuck it”

#2: All Too Well (10 Minute Version) (Taylor’s Version) (From The Vault) - Taylor Swift

Are we surprised? One of Taylor’s greatest songs, the biggest fan and critics favorite of all time, in all its glory. Do we really believe all of the added lyrics were written during that first session? Absolutely not, but every added verse, chorus and bridge is worth all the gold to make this song even greater than it once was. All Too Well 5 minutes who? I don’t know her.

Favorite lyrics: (how do i choose just one) “And then you wondered where it went to as I reached for you / But all I felt was shame and you held my lifeless frame”

AAAAAND for some honorable mentions before we get to SONG OF THE YEAR !!

Clothes - Scuuut

Fancy - Lennon Stella

Introvert - Little Simz

Rather Be - James Vickery

Voila - Barbara Pravi

AND THE SONG OF THE YEAR GOES TO.......

#1: Happier Than Ever - Billie Eilish

Like most people, I wish I had recorded my reaction to the second part of this song, because that was a very unexpected experience. While there were new elements and sides of Billie in the album before this, there’s nothing like starting a song like we always have heard her: soft, quiet singing over an acoustic instrument. You think, this is where this song is going? That’s fine, it’s a pretty song, nothing special. Then the guitar picks up and you’re like, okay interesting, nothing biggie. Then it changes to an electric guitar, and the curiosity increases, you wonder if this might go somewhere… then “and I don’t talk sh– about you” kicks in and she’s yelling and the song intensifies and distorts and ?!?!?!? I get chills listening to it every time just thinking back to the first time I experienced this. Absolutely baffled that this isn’t the album closer, because it should 100% be.

Favorite lyrics: “I could talk about every time that you showed up on time But I'd have an empty line 'cause you never did”

[alightwhendarknessfell]

Black Veil Conspiracy Time

So I've noticed something with Andy's costumes for the TPT era videos/photoshoots. He's always wearing a garter around his thigh but the color of it keeps changing. I'm starting to think there is significance to it considering how detailed Andy is with his outfits (especially in this era).

I first noticed it in the Scarlet Cross music video where it's red. I figured it might just be part of the black/red color scheme but then it appeared in all the photoshoots. Then all of a sudden (around the time they started posting the pool photo shoots) it's white. Then in the Torch teaser, it's black (with a red suit, so the reverse of the black suit/red garter).

I wanna hear people’s theories on it and I’ve got a few myself. I'm hoping that with the album/comic release we'll find out what it actually means but until then I thought it might be fun to hear what everyone else thinks it could symbolize.

(Disclaimer: These are just my interpretations of what it could mean and is just meant for fun.)

Theory 1: Religious/Historical Meaning: Garters are traditionally worn by brides and have come to have different purposes/meanings. Given the name of the band is Black Veil Brides it could just be an easter egg type thing or it might have a symbolic meaning.

The garter originated because people believed having a piece of a bride's dress was good luck. That led to bridal parties ripping a brides' dress off in an attempt to get a piece of good luck or to help "consummate" the marriage. In order to prevent this, the tradition of the garter toss started. Giving someone a "piece" of the dress spared the bride. Andy could be wearing it to symbolize the idea of giving a part of himself to the fans/world through Black Veil's music. Much in the same way brides used to toss their garter as a way to appease the wedding guest and keep from having the rest of their clothes ripped off it could be his way of saying "here I will give you this (the music/band)". With the expectation being that in sharing that part of himself he will be allowed to keep the rest of himself private. Andy is a pretty private person when it comes to his daily life, but being "famous" makes that hard.

Another meaning of the garter goes back to the importance placed on the bride being pure (aka a virgin). The expectation was that on the wedding night the groom would "deflower" the bride. The families also placed a great deal of importance on this and the garter was often used as "proof" that the marriage was consummated. Thus tying it to the idea of purity/loss of innocence. If you listen to Black Veil/Andy Black's discography there is a recurrent theme in the songs of innocence, specifically of lost innocence. I think Andy could have incorporated it due to this meaning which would also tie into the religious themes of the TPT era. The changing color (see next point) is also what makes me think this might be closer to the meaning behind it. Andy was 18 when he moved to Hollywood which is still very much a teenager. Before his 20th birthday, he was touring the world, signing major record deals, and basically forced to grow up very fast. There's no end to people waiting to take advantage of young, impressionable, and starry-eyed kids in order to use them for personal gain. I mean how many childhood stars end up fucked up as a result of their early fame, then have to navigate their way back to who they really are. Andy's spoken quite a bit over the last few years about how he kind of fell victim to the "rock n' roll lifestyle" during his early years. I think the "loss of innocence" he's possibly referring to is the blissful ignorance that kids/young adults have about the world. Once you learn how ugly the world can be (whether that's the music industry, fame, or the world in general) that childhood innocence starts to go away.

You can't get it back, and although it's replaced with knowledge and better judgment, I think a lot of us miss the carefreeness of childhood. If this is the meaning behind the garter then I think the color change really deepens it.

Theory 2: Color Meaning: Red -> white -> black I think this has to mean something. Red could symbolize being tainted in some way, whether that be shame, sin, the idea of having "blood on your hands", crime/blasphemy, etc. The fact that the red garter appears in Scarlet Cross, a song about being branded with a scarlet cross as punishment, I think makes this more likely. The lyrics almost explicitly state this idea "A symbol for my shame, the color of your name, its how they see you break, and live with my mistakes". The red garter could be his way of saying there is some sin he feels the need to atone for. Alternatively that he feels he's being accused of a crime/sin. If you read up on The Scarlet Letter there are several parallels to the TPT storyline as it's been revealed so far. I think at least the song was influenced by the pop-culture idea of a "scarlet letter".

The change in color to white (generally seen as good, holy, pure, etc) could mean that whatever sin or transgression has been committed has been absolved. As we saw the red garter in Scarlet Cross, I think it's interesting we see the white garter in an abandoned pool. Pool = water and water is cleansing. This might be a coincidence but it's interesting nonetheless. I do think that the white garter is supposed to symbolize whatever "bad" thing the red meant being forgiven/cleansed.

Which leads us to the black garter. The fact that we first see the black garter in the Torch teaser which appears to be set in a graveyard makes me think it symbolizes death. Interestingly, I believe he wore a version of the red garter that had a black stripe on it which could have been foreshadowing. There is also an inversion of Scarlet Cross where he wore a black suit with red accents, now he is in a red suit with black accents. Andy said that the four music videos represent a story within the TPT world and this could play into it. However, I don't think the "death" meaning is necessarily bad. It could be, but since it was proceeded by white, it might mean that since whatever sin has been absolved he is now free to let it die. Death could symbolize freedom. The teaser made me think back to the Coffin music video which featured Andy closing the lid on his "Andy Six" persona but left the question as to was he really dead.

We'll have to see what Torch brings but I feel that the garter and its color could play into a wider theme of closing a very long chapter in his life/the band's. Since this comes at the start of a new era, before the album I think it might be a way to transition into that new era. The last album, Vale, was a very dark album. Andy has spoken about how horrible of a place he and the band were in (due to reasons I think we now all know given the events of 2019/2020). I have a feeling this new era represents freedom from what was haunting them, past mistakes, etc. The lyrics for Feilds of Bone speak to this idea in my opinion.

Theory 3: Other: There is meaning in The Phantom Tomorrow world and that will be revealed in the album/comic. It might have a personal meaning for Andy or he just thought it was cool and a way to color coordinate. Alternately he's just be fucking with us for fun lol.

I hope you all enjoyed my conspiracy ramblings because I've had a lot of fun thinking up different meanings. Shout out to Andy for creating such interesting looks and for his creativity. I'm loving all the hidden messages, cryptic posts, and mystery surrounding this album. I'm so incredibly excited for it to come out. Feel free to send in your own theories or anything else you've noticed so far!

[ryqoshay]

OTP Ask Meme (Impatient Edition) NicoMaki

Yeah, I know the point of these things is to wait for followers to Ask questions from the list, but reading though this one got me thinking too much. And, as the title implies, I got impatient and wanted to answer them all. Right away.

Anyway, credit to @lonelypond​ for this version coming across my dash. Reblog that version if you want to do this thing correctly.

Also, just because I’ve already answered these here, I’ve expanded on some for various reasons and left others short if I believe the reasons are obvious. So if you still want to do the whole interactive thing, you can still ask for clarification or whatever.

And finally, there will be spoilers ahead for How to Handle a Nico, both scenes I’ve written and posted, as well as some that remain in my Notes and WIP Warehouse. I’ll try to remember to link to the chapters mentioned.

1. Who wakes up first?

Nico, so she can make breakfast for her Maki.

2. Who wants to stay in bed just a little longer?

Maki. Usually because she studies or works later and/or longer hours. She is also not above pulling Nico back into bed when she comes to wake her.

3. Who takes longer getting ready?

Usually Nico.

4. When they can’t sleep, what do they do?

Maki’s libido can pretty much always be counted on to at least exhaust Nico, if not both of them.

5. Who falls asleep while watching a movie?

Depends on who had a rough day or week at work/school, though Maki may get bored and either watch Nico or fall asleep during overly sappy romance movies.

6. Who falls asleep last, watching the other with a small affectionate smile?

Either, depending on the stresses of the prior day.

7. Who comes up with the cheesy pick-up lines?

Nico intentionally. Maki unintentionally.

8. Who gets extremely competitive playing Mario Kart?

They both are, though in different ways. This is depicted in Consolation Prize.

9. Who accidentally pushes a door instead of pulling?

Maki, especially if she is in an unfamiliar place.

10. Who sets the other’s ringtone to something loud and obnoxious behind their back?

Both, though Maki only in retaliation for whatever teasing Nico may have done.

11. Who rearranges the bookshelf/DVD shelf in alphabetical order?

Nico likes a proper presentation of her idol merch. Maki is too busy with other stuff to care about special organization.

12. Who does the hands-over-the-eyes “Guess Who” thing?

Nico.

13. Who points out a dog when they see one?

Either.

14. Who’s prone to road rage?

Maki, especially when she is trying to get to the hospital when called in at some odd hour, or trying to get home after a stressful day.

15. Who’s prone to wearing socks indoor (or to sleep)?

Nico gets cold easier. Warm socks help.

16. Who reminds the other to put on sunscreen before going to the beach (or pool)?

Nico, partly out of habit from doing it with her siblings and partly as an excuse to offer to help Maki put it on. Depicted in Sunscreen.

17. Who carries all the important documents while traveling?

Nico.

18. Who gets the window seat?

Nico. Maki traveled enough with her parents and is happy to let her girlfriend see the sights instead.

19. Who puts their cold hands/feet on the other?

Nico intentionally. Maki unintentionally, usually.

20. What do they argue about the most?

I don’t believe anyone has been brave enough to track the data for this.

21. Who’s clumsier?

Maki, especially in the kitchen. Nico has her moments though.

22. Who texts more often?

Nico. With heavy emoji use. (I need to depict this more in HtHaN somehow)

23. Who is better with kids?

Nico. She was the primary caregiver for her siblings for many years after all.

24. Who’s the better cook?

Nico. See above.

25. Who mistakes salt for sugar?

Maki. Even after Nico labeled the containers.

26. Who puts the fork in the microwave?

Maki.

27. Who cooks at 2 in the morning?

Nico. Maki isn’t allowed to cook without Nico’s supervision. However, this would be a rare occasion as Nico typically will prepare something ahead of when Maki is arriving home this late and leave it for her to reheat.

28. Who lets the microwave play the loud beeping sound at 1 a.m.?

Maki, when she’s reheating whatever Nico made for her after arriving home late.

29. Who licks the spoon when they’re baking brownies?

Both.

30. Who likes doing the dishes?

Nico, though it would be more appropriate to say she doesn’t dislike it.

31. Who has bigger cravings? What are they?

Nico loves her sweets. Maki loves her Nico.

32. Who remembers what the other one always orders at a restaurant?

Nico is highly attentive to Maki’s preferences in food. Knowing what Maki likes in restaurants lets her know what she can make at home. And food is definitely one of the best ways to Maki’s heart.

33. How do they eat ice cream? What’s their favorite flavors?

Nico likes sundaes with lots of sugary toppings. She also likes trying new flavors and will often get multiple scoops of different flavors. Maki is fine with a single scoop cone.

34. Do they go on dates? What are they like?

As often as their schedules allow. Maki likes quite dates like walks in a park or museum or sitting up on a hillside for stargazing. Nico likes shopping for outfits and idol merch, going to movies and bustling amusement parks. But both love watching the other enjoy their hobbies so they’re willing to go along with the other’s interests as well.

35. What do they smell when they smell Amortentia?

Nico smells her father’s aftershave, strawberries, and stewing tomatoes. Maki smells Nico’s special tomato curry, Nico’s shampoo, and the cinnamon sugar of the snickerdoodle cookies the Nishikino baker made for her to leave out for Santa.

Yes, two of Maki’s are directly related to Nico. What can I say? She’s addicted.

36. Which one is the secret snuggler?

Maki. The more tired or drunk she is, the clingier she gets.

37. Which one offers their jacket to the other when they complain they feel cold?

Maki. Nico gets cold easier, so Maki is usually the one to offer her jacket.

38. Who reaches for the other one’s hand while driving?

Yes.

39. Who leaves little notes in the other one’s lunch?

Nico, because she is the only one who makes lunch for them both; Maki isn’t the type to do such a thing even if she were allowed to cook more. (Bonus: What does it say?) Usually the messages are simple affirmations of love, but she is not above getting snarky if the two had an argument recently.

40. Who is the most affectionate?

Nico in public. Maki in private.

41. Who is the big spoon/little spoon?

Usually, Maki is the big spoon as she is quite fond of hugging her Nico like a teddy bear, though Nico will sometimes jetpack.

42. What is their favorite feature of their partner?

Maki loves Nico’s smile, particularly her genuine, unforced, non-idol persona smile. Nico loves Maki’s voice, specifically her singing voice.

43. What is the first thing that changes when they realize they have feelings for the other?

Nico starts teasing Maki more, no longer to “put the spoiled rich girl in her place” but rather to see more of the adorable reactions. Maki actively tries to deny her feelings, even to, or perhaps especially to herself, falling back on established habits of insisting that she doesn’t have time to date, all the while quietly continuing to seek more time with Nico.

44. What are their nicknames for each other?

Both exclusively use -chan with the other.

45. Who worries the most? Over what?

Early on, both are worried about losing the other for different reasons. Nico is afraid that should a scandal occur that ruins her idol career, Maki may blame herself and leave. Maki fears that a busy schedule of studying in medical school followed by long hours at the hospital may turn away someone like Nico, whose attention seeking seems infinite. Later, as they settle into their relationship, their concerns turn to more stereotypical adult fears; traffic or transit accidents, sever illnesses, etc.

46. Who initiates kisses?

Nico in public. Maki in private.

47. Who says I love you first? How did it happen?

Nico, by accident, as depicted in Spoken.

48. Who tells their friends/family about their relationship first?

Technically Maki in both cases, though with their friends, Nico was active in the chatroom, and with their mothers, Maki only beat Nico by maybe half an hour or so. These instances are depicted in Reconstructed Reunion and Telling Mama.

49. What do they do when they’re away from each other?

Both have busy schedules, even as early as the years immediately following high school, so spending time away from each other is quite commonplace. This still did not stop Maki from going through a bout of depression during Nico’s first tour as a professional idol, as depicted in Homesick and Homecoming. From then on, Maki starts a tradition of visiting Nico during longer tours so as to break up their time away a bit.

50. Who gets overwhelmed by small acts of kindness?

Nico, as the more romantic of the two. This isn’t to say Maki doesn’t value sentiment, she just has other ways of expressing it than being overwhelmed.

[madmaddoxfuryroad]

HSMTMTS: Season 3 thoughts

So I’ve been ruminating a lot about this show today (like every other day) and I got to thinking about what they might do for season 3. Less so plot-wise (I mean season 2 is just over halfway through), but more about what musical they might do, what the cast might be, and how that could tie into the individual characters and their arcs (some more so than others, but c’est la vie).

In trying to figure out what musical they might do, I started first with the obvious: what does Disney own? I don’t think they would return to the HSM franchise (until the final season, but thoughts on that for another day), so anything related to that and other DCOMs I counted out. I also eliminated all Disney animated/princess films. I love them, don’t get me wrong, but seeing as this season they are doing BATB, I don’t think they would immediately go into another animated-film-adapted-for-broadway right after that. So at that point I wasn’t quite sure where to go. Mary Poppins was really the only other thing that came to mind and while I love the film and broadway show I just don’t think it fits the cast well slash even has enough parts to really showcase them. You have Mary and Bert. And then I guess Mr. and Mrs. Banks? Then the kids are a whole other issue. It just felt messy. So I just started thinking about broadway shows that I like, I mean if they wanted to, Disney has the money and could pay for the rights to use most shows. Then everything fell into place.

Into the Woods. I am 100% positive I am letting my bias for this show cloud my judgement, but if you stick with me, I think I can persuade you (or not, your mind is your own and I respect that). First off, Disney owns it. At least I think they do. They made the movie (RIP), so I am going to safely assume they have the rights at this point. Next, yes it contains fairytale elements, which might make you feel it’s a little too close to BATB, but it is such a deconstruction of fairytales and their tropes that I almost feel like it is an amazing follow up to a more traditional fairytale. It introduces conflict and the real world into these fantasy scenarios, which I feel goes really well with high school in general and growing up, expectations being shattered, and learning to alter your world view (I really love this play). Plus, I think it would be exciting to see this cast do a more broadway-type show. Obviously BATB is a broadway show, but I think there is a lot of reliance on knowing the film and less on the play itself. And not going to lie after Julia Lester’s rendition of “Home” last week (which I have not STOPPED listening to) it would be amazing to hear these teens tackle more broadway-style music. Which, takes me to my final point: the cast. What I love so much about Into the Woods is how it is very much an ensemble cast. Yes some roles are bigger than others, but if you have a named character, odds are it’s a fairly good role. And the whole HSMTMTS cast is so talented, I like the idea of them picking a show where it does not feel like anyone is sidelined with their part. Now the only thing left to do is cast it…

FULL disclosure. I ran into an issue early on that I ended up thinking Ashlyn was perfect for every female role and Seb was perfect for every male role. But I was eventually able to push through and cast it (in my humble opinion) pretty well. So I am just going to go off in the order that I cast them, because I think it will help explain my thought process.

THE CAST

Cinderella - Nini. Once I got over my need to hear Julia/Ashlyn sing “No One Is Alone” (loophole to this coming later), this felt like a pretty natural fit and was one of the easiest to cast. For one, I just think Olivia’s vocal range pairs very well with Cinderella’s and she could do beautifully with her songs like “On the Steps Of The Palace”. But what really got me was the way she parallels the character so perfectly. Cinderella is a character who always dreams of more but isn’t quite sure what that “more” is. And because she isn’t *quite* sure what she wants, the character is often seen grappling with indecision (see: “On The Steps Of The Palace”). Most of Act I is her being stagnant and letting the Prince take the active role. Finally in Act II she starts to get a better sense of who she is, who she wants to be, and what she doesn’t want. So this felt like it tied in really nicely with Nini’s journey and would be a great role for her, especially when…

Cinderella’s Prince - Ricky. Yes, yes I know. Ricky and Nini playing love interests? Groundbreaking. But stay with me. For one, I just like the idea of Ricky not getting the lead male role, and this part is perfect for him, regardless. The whole relationship between Cinderella and her Prince mirrors Nini and Ricky remarkably well. The way the Prince sees Cinderella as this perfect maiden who, if he could just be with her, would be the only thing he would ever want/need. But of course this isn’t realistic and isn’t how relationships work, which they both come to terms with by the end of Act II. Their break-up/parting ways scene might be my favorite in the entire play and I think it would be so great for Ricky and Nini to get to perform. In part because the conclusion of the scene is basically them both admitting that they will always love the idea of the other, even though they don’t actually work as a couple. (**I am operating on the assumption that they will have broken up in season 2 and are still broken up, but never really dealt with it). Honestly I recommend just watching the scene I will link it here (it goes from about 2:12:35-2:15:00). Plus, I could totally see there being an episode where they are trying to rehearse this scene, but it just isn’t working so Miss Jenn has both of them improv it or rewrite the lines to something that might feel more comfortable or personal. And I just see that being a really beautiful moment for the two and a chance for growth and closure. I could go on about this dynamic, but I will move on to my final point: “Agony”. First, while it is mostly a comedic song, you can take just the first verse of the song and recontextualize it really nicely as a Ricky pining kind of song, which I absolutely dig (not quitting on my Rina endgame, and you can’t make me) I mean: “If I should lose her, how shall I regain the heart she has won from me? Agony, beyond power of speech, when the one thing you want is the only thing out of your reach”. And BONUS I think we could also get a full-on version of “Agony” in all its absurdist glory with…

Rapunzel’s Prince - EJ. Well, sort of. Technically, no. BUT for the purposes of “Agony”, yes. At this point EJ will have graduated, but I don’t think he will be written out of the show, so it remains to be seen exactly what his place will be. I just think these two 100% need a song together and this is 100% that song. I could see it being something as simple as EJ is helping out with the show, the unnamed kid playing Rapunzel’s Prince is out, so they have EJ fill in. Or they have to have him go on for that kid last minute during the performance. It’s a quick, easily explainable thing that would have SUCH a great payoff.

Jack - Big Red. This was certainly one of the easier ones to cast, but my first thought was of course Seb. Jack is just a boy whose best friend is his cow and Seb radiates that energy. But I needed him for something else. Enter Big Red, the perfect Jack. For one, Big Red has a lot of that starry eyed wonderment that Jack has, that none of the other characters do. There is a purity and innocence to the way Jack sees a lot of things. That pairs nicely with Big Red. And it also opens the door for him to grow and mature more as a character. By the end of the show, Jack is in a place where is needs to transition more to adulthood and with Big Red being a senior by season 3, I think there is a lot of potential here. Also, with Big Red as Jack, I really like the character he is often paired with in scenes, but I will hold back until I get to them.

Witch - Kourtney. Yes. It is her time. One can debate over which character is the “main character” of Into the Woods, but for me it’s the Witch. And Kourtney deserves this. Did I heavily consider Ashlyn for this as well? You know I did. But I grow more and more confident in the casting of Kourtney the more I think about it. First thing’s first: the Witch belts, and I mean BELTS. Dara is such a powerhouse vocally that she would crush every moment of that; I have total faith. But the Witch also has such quiet and tender moments that people don’t think about as much, but are so necessary for the character to be effective and I think she also has that on lock. We have not seen a ton of it (so I would be eager to get more) but when she did her version of “Beauty and the Beast” she was able to find soft but strong moments in the song, and it was so lovely. Then, from a more thematic POV, the Witch is characterized as “the voice of reason”. While everyone else is running around in their fairytale dream world, she is always the one there dolling out the reality checks. And if that ain’t Kourtney. Basically, I think it is her time to get the lead and she would be amazing in this role.

Baker - Seb. Finally settled on a role for him. But really, how could it be anything else? I have felt since the first time we heard him sing (in Truth, Justice, and Songs in our Key, I think) that he was severely underused. The Baker is essentially the male lead, and he has earned it. I don’t think there’s much more that needs to be said here.

Baker’s Wife - Ashlyn. Here’s the thing: could someone else be cast as Baker’s Wife? Yes. And I am sure they would do a fine job. But the thing about this role is that you often don’t realize how fantastic it is until you see someone really great playing it. There’s heart, humor, tragedy, and so much more all wrapped into this character and I would far and away trust Julia/Ashlyn with this above all others. And Baker’s Wife gets to sing a short reprise of “No One Is Alone” so I get to win both ways. No matter how I try to cast it or rearrange characters, I keep coming back to the fact that Ashlyn is just hands down the correct choice. Plus she is one of the better options when it comes to having chemistry with Seb. And I’m not even talking about romantic chemistry, just more about the camaraderie of it, and being able to really see them as a team worth rooting for. They both have an inherent sweetness that makes you care for them, which is crucial for the show. AND this would be another opportunity for Julia Lester to flex her acting after playing VERY different roles in HSM and BATB. Basically, I don’t know when it happened, but I think I am a Julia Lester stan and I only want what is best for her and I think this is it. 

Little Red - Gina. “Didn’t see that one coming did you?” -Pietro Maximoff. And honestly same. There’s always that tough moment in casting when you’ve done the more obvious ones and then you feel sort of stuck with cast choices that weren’t really your choice. But this one really grew on me. Hopefully, I can do it justice. And I will be the first to admit Gina deserves her time to shine because I do think she is amazing. It just isn’t her time yet. It also doesn’t help that Into the Woods is one of the LEAST dance-centered shows and dance it where she really puts all others to shame. So this is where we landed. But it works. I promise. Little Red as a character is pretty naïve, but covers it up with over the top confidence. That feels pretty Gina. I love where her character has gone and all the growth she is displayed in trying to be more vulnerable. But there is still a part of me that does miss mean girl Gina and I think Little Red is a great way to get that energy without backtracking the character development. I don’t think she would be the stereotypical “bratty” Little Red, but I think she could still do something great with it. Also very similar to Jack, Little Red is one of the more innocent characters that has to grow up and face a lot of harsh realities over the course of the play. And I have no doubt Gina would nail that aspect of it, too. And speaking of Jack, Little Red has a number of scenes interacting with him and you know what that means: Gina and Big Red bonding time! I really like the idea of these roles bringing the two closer as friends. And I already head-canon that they would have a ton of fun playing with the fact that they are now Big Red and Little Red (especially since he is on the shorter side and she is on the taller side). Basically I see this as a way for them to build up a really good rapport. I am also pretty convinced that Big Red is a secret Rina shipper, and this would only add to that. And finally even though this is not a dance-heavy show at all, one place where they could add a dance is during “Hello Little Girl”. Now I will be the first to admit that this song is dicey at best, particularly for Disney. But even a scene working on the dance with just the instrumental, no lyrics, could be great. I see it as a partner dance with the wolf (I don’t know dance terms, so maybe this is super vague). And oh, wouldn’t you know it? Cinderella’s Prince is often double-cast as the wolf! (WHAT ARE THE CHANCES) Meaning the Wolf would also be good ol’ Richard Bowen. And I like the idea of getting Rina scenes of them trying to work on the dance, but Ricky is super bad a leading, and they just have fun trying to figure it out. It’s also nice that it is absolutely not a romantic dance so the two wouldn’t feel any added pressure and could just have fun with one another, and that really is when Rina is at its best (not that I would say no to a scene where Gina has to teach Ricky the BATB waltz, but I digress).

Narrator/Mysterious Man - Carlos. By process of elimination, you probably could have guessed who was next. And I know this one also feels like a weird choice but I do kind of love it. First you have the narrator, which is another one of those roles that is only as memorable as the actor playing it, which I think is right up Carlos’ alley. He is always trying to put his unique stamp on things and be memorable and he would take the narrator in a very enjoyable direction. There’s also the matter that I see Carlos as something of an assistant director with Miss Jenn, which makes him a third-party observer of the shows inherently, so it is almost a little meta that he would also end up being the narrator. Then there’s is the mysterious man. I love the idea of Carlos getting to play two very different characters, but I love it even more because the mysterious man is the father of the baker which makes for a lot of sweet moments between the two of them. Yes it might be a little weird for Seblos to be playing father and son, but there is such a vulnerability and tenderness in the moments between the two characters, particularly during “No More” that I can get over it. Because I think they are one of the few pairings on this show that could really pull that off. I just think this character would be a great way to exhibit the range of Carlos.

**BONUS ALTERNATE CASTING**

I really, really love this idea and could not fault them if this was the direction they went, but I ultimately decided against it, mostly because I felt too strongly about another character having the role BUT:

Baker’s Husband - Carlos. I just really love the idea of Seblos getting to be front and center, with their dynamic as the focal point of the show. And honestly Carlos would also do an amazing job as this character. I mean, Seb and Carlos singing “It Takes Two”? How sweet is that? This would also be a great way for the development of their relationship to get a little bit more attention, instead of a side story here and there. There is a lot that could be done with this from a story perspective and I would be here for it.

Unfortunately, then that leaves me unsure of where to put Ashlyn. She could be Jack’s mother, but that feels like such a waste of her. I mean, she would do well and she does have the lead this year, so it’s not SO terrible her having a more minor character, but it just doesn’t feel right. And I really just feel so strongly that she would be the best option for Baker’s Wife out of everyone. And it opens the door to develop the Seb and Ashlyn friendship more, which I am always here for. 

Anyway. Those are my thoughts. If you made it this far: wow and thank you!

[ladyzayinwonderland]

Hiya Zay! So I noticed you posted about a Hadestown crossover and I wanted to ask you what you love about the musical! Favorite song? Favorite quality? What about the story/songs/costumes/characters/choreography/atmosphere/etc evokes Feelings? What is/are the primary mood(s) it inspires in you? Favorite headcanon or tender moment? Favorite line/lyric? (FYI I know you're not on here regularly and I RESPECT that, so if you want to answer, feel utterly free to take your time)... ❤️ Poly

Okay this has been a long time coming (I just didn’t realize how long it would take) but I finally have an answer! Thank you for your patience, dear Poly, and thank you for the super ask! I’m always willing to gush about Hadestown and it was so fun to have the opportunity ^_^

It is, however, a very long answer... it kinda got away from me in the process, hehe.

Favorite song: I feel like it might be cliché to say Wait for Me, but… all the versions of the song are gorgeous in different ways. If I had to be more original, then I would have to say We Raise Our Cups. I tear up every time I listen to it.

Favorite Quality: In the words of Hermes, “it’s a love song.” Orpheus loves Eurydice enough to go to hell to get her. Eurydice loves Orpheus enough to follow him out, though the way is hard. Hades loves Persephone, though he doesn’t know how to show it and is afraid to lose her. Persephone loves Hades enough to keep coming back to him to “try again”. I know that some of those loves are flawed, but they’re human. The beacon of that love and what it represents is important.

Story: I adore the inevitability of Hadestown. We know from the very beginning how this is going to end and yet we still hope that maybe it might just be different this time. We can’t help but hope. I think it speaks to the quality of the musical that it can still pull you in every time. Very cathartic.

Songs: My favorite thing about the songs is having been able to witness their growth and maturity from album to album! Themes, lyrics, and melodies have so many subtle changes that only seem to ring more true with time. It’s also so cool to see how it needed 10+ years to ruminate into the musical we have now. (But this might also be subjective to me because I found out about Hadestown when there was only a concept album, then kept up with each new development until my husband and I were able to see it on Broadway just after its premier.) And I’m very excited to see how the national tour turns out!!

Costumes: I love the tattered/steampunk/industrial look of the OBC show. But I also love what I’ve seen of the off-broadway show, the whimsical costumes of Nabiyah’s Eurydice and early Persephone’s dresses and boldness of Damon’s red jacket (bring! it! back!). The costumes definitely change the vibes of the show though, which is just fascinating to me. Mostly in Eurydice’s character, so…….

Characters: Eurydice. Has. Character. She is three-dimensional, rounded out, and can stand on her own. (this was always something I wished had been different with the myth) It’s interesting to note how her character is portrayed slightly differently depending on the show though? I can’t speak so much to Nabiyah’s portrayal because I didn’t see it, but the music makes me think that she’s harsher and angrier than Eva’s softer and more hopeful version. Orpheus too experiences subtle shifts between Damon and Reeve, specifically bolder to more naïve, which… I don’t hate, but I miss Damon’s Oprheus. I also love that all the main players experience change/growth! They all have agency!

Choreography: I love the transition between carefree in the world above to stark and sharp down below. Tbh Livin’ It Up On Top is not my ~fav~ choreography-wise, however, I recognize it’s a chance for the cast to let loose and have a good time, and it’s important to show just how different things are between the two settings. But the moment we are down below? Stellar. Sharp, synchronized movements that immediately remind you of the cogs of a machine. And I do love how the movements become more human by the time we get to If It’s True and Wait for Me II.

Bonus—the lamp choreo in Wait for Me. I sobbed when I saw them swinging and being used to light an otherwise dark space, leading Orpheus deeper underground.

Atmosphere: slight steampunk vibes my beloved. The off-broadway and Canadian productions’ Tree is something I wish had stayed for the OBC production. In addition to being gorgeous, it adds an element of nature to juxtapose to Hades’ cold, harshly lit, industrial underground. The OBC loses that little bit of earth by taking place in a train station bar. That said, I do enjoy the bar setting in parallel to Persephone’s dismal speakeasy down below. The presence of the band on stage, motley but involved in the story beyond just the music.

Inspired moods: I like angst, for better or for worse. I’ve always been drawn to Orpheus and Eurydice because of how tragic it is. I think it’s very Romantic™. Therefore, any incarnation or representation of the story is automatically my jam. I like that, regardless of how many times I have listened to the album, I still hold on to the hope that it might turn out differently. Just once. That hope is something so precious, something that still deserves to be passed on even if it’s been dashed to pieces. It’s never in vain, you can always try again.

(And, this probably isn’t as relevant, but I think there’s something to be said from a Christian perspective on the show as well. Orpheus is just a man and prone to doubt, as the show illustrates. He fails. We all fail. But there is hope found in One who literally can’t fail in bringing the lost back to Him, and that is an encouraging thought.)

Headcanon: I hold to this one interpretation of the tale that Orpheus looking back was a sign of love (though I don’t discount it being an act of doubt or weakness). I like to think that he was just wanted to see her again, wanted to make sure she made it too, but he was just a fraction of a moment too soon. It almost makes her “death” more tragic.

Tender Moment: my favorite tender moments from the show are 1) when Orpheus runs to the stage through the audience to reach Eurydice again in the second act. Mostly because I didn’t expect it. I was focused on her when a white and red blur with a guitar ran down the aisle to peek his head above the edge of the stage with a joyful “come home with me?” My Heart. 2) when Orpheus finishes Epic III and Hermes says “and you know what they did? They danced.” There is a twenty second bit of acoustic guitar and violin while Hades and Persephone dance for the first time together in ages. It wasn’t a grand or sweeping moment—it was just an old man stumbling through a rusty dance with his wife, and it felt genuine.

Favorite Line/Lyric: starting off strong with the first words of the show. There’s no introduction to Hadestown, no warning it’s about to start. Just Hermes sauntering onstage, looking you straight in the eye, and saying “Alright?” Then the band starts playing and the show begins. Incredible. Unprecedented. But also I weep for all of the Epics. Such solid poetry. So soft.

So anyway, those are my thoughts! They may be a little repetitive, but hopefully I conveyed myself decently enough. Thank you again, lovely!! <3

[troutfishinginmusic]

The story of Grass Records: From Brainiac to Wind-Up and Creed

                                                              Images via Grass of ’96 compilation 

Everything isn’t available in the streaming era. There are notable gaps in the seemingly bottomless amount of music currently available. Some of the most noticeable exclusions are albums released on Grass Records.

If you’re a fan of ’90s indie music, this short-lived New York label mattered. Though sometimes dismissed as a sibling label to Homestead Records, Grass released over 60 full-length albums ranging from pop to punk to noise to experimental music. It raised the profile of influential bands like Brainiac, Toadies and the Wrens. 

The amazing thing about the label is how consistent it is. Every time I thought I was done with this article, I would listen to a band like Baboon and be completely blown away. These are all fascinating, idiosyncratic bands. This is more incredible considering the label was only around for about four years.

Much of this music is hard to find. The odd song might be lingering on YouTube, but you’re almost better off looking at your local record store or ordering from Discogs.

Why are the albums in this weird limbo? Mostly because the monied interest who bought the label in 1996 thought it wasn’t yielding a big enough return on the investment. Grass was gutted and rebranded into post-grunge/nu metal giant Wind-Up. Money poured in and these wonderfully weird records were swept to the side.

The following interviews were conducted via email, Facebook messenger and phone over the last few months. Quotes from the interviews have been edited for style/clarity. I’m eternally grateful to everyone who got back to me. I am also willing to expand this story if more former Grass artists want to reach out. If you’re one of these artists, my email is at the bottom of this story.

Seedlings

“I started in the music business purely by chance,” said Camille Sciara, who founded Grass Records.

Sciara got her start working at Record World in New York as a second job and became friendly with the store’s buyer. After attending a manager training program, she moved on to become a manager of the store. Her second job became her first.

“Then, after two years there, I became bored managing a record store and my friend Mike, the buyer, told me about Dutch East India,” Sciara said. “I started there as a salesperson and, after a year of sales, became the buyer when that position opened up. I never envisioned starting a label.”

While working as a buyer at Dutch East India Trading a friend sent her a Toadies cassette. She “loved it” and started Grass in 1993 to release it.

Grass released the Toadies EP Pleather soon after, which contained an early version of the band’s inescapable alternative hit “Possum Kingdom.” After Pleather, the band scored a major label deal with Interscope. The platinum-selling Rubberneck arrived in 1994.

“They did really well on their first major release,” Sciara said in an email interview. “But then it appeared that Interscope just dropped the ball or lost interest. They were such a great band live, I never understood how they weren't huge stars. And super cool people.”

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Tall grass

Sciara would go on to sign unique and influential bands like Brainiac and The Wrens.

“Since I had never run a label before, I was going purely on how much I liked what they submitted,” Sciara said. “Obviously not the best business model for running a label, but for the money we offered it worked to some respect. The longer I ran the label, the more I understood what was needed from them [the bands] regarding can they tour etc.”

There were few bands of the 90s that radiated weirdo energy as brightly and brilliantly as Brainiac. The documentary Transmissions from Zero chronicles the significant impact the band had on the music scene at the time. It also shows a band on the brink of mainstream success. Brainiac released two albums on Grass, Smack Bunny Baby and Bonsai Superstar, before departing for Touch & Go. The band’s forward motion was sadly cut short by Tim Taylor’s death in 1997. Prior to this, Interscope was expressing interest in the band.

“If Tim hadn't passed I'm pretty sure they'd have been the biggest [band on the label],” Sciara said.

Original Brainiac guitarist Michelle Bodine said Grass’ association with Dutch East India made the label initially attractive.

“[Camille] was super excited about us and we had total creative freedom,” Bodine said. “We also liked the 2-record deal with the option of 3 contract.”

After leaving Brainiac, Bodine would go on to play guitar and sing in O-Matic. The band released its lone album Dog Years in 1996. The album is one of the overlooked gems of the ’90s.

The Wrens’ influence reverberated in more subtle ways. The band’s first two albums, Silver (1994) and Secaucus (1996), provided a blueprint for much of the post-Pixies landscape of ’90s indie rock. They could’ve been much bigger, but still made a significant impression.

“The depth of realization in this record is unparalleled: every angle is perfected,” Pitchfork founder Ryan Schreiber said about Secaucus. The band’s third long awaited album, Meadowlands, dropped in 2001 and received a “Best New Music” tag from the same publication.

Rumblings of a follow-up to Meadowlands have been thrown around for the last 10 years, but a record has yet to materialize.

The level of talent the label had was staggering. A few groups Sciara thought would be bigger ranged from the Irish dream-pop band Chimera to Georgia punk band Sunbrain. “There's more, it would be long list,” Sciara said.

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New shoots

Baltimore

Baltimore punk band Liquor Bike had released one album before signing a two-record deal with Grass. The band’s first release on the label was Neon Hoop Ride in 1993. Liquor Bike was excited to be on the label because of the Homestead Records connection.

“We loved being on Grass, we toured like crazy,” singer/guitarist David Koslowski said. “We had great booking with Creature Booking.”

Between the booking agency, which had done work with Nirvana, Helmet, the Lunachicks and Jesus Lizard; and the new label things were looking up for the band. The band would have posters up in whatever towns they were playing in and mentions in the local paper. The label would keep them up to date if they had to do things like impromptu radio interviews. When they got off the road, they entered the studio to record The Beauty of Falling Apart. During this time Alan Meltzer, who bought the label from Sciara in 1996, entered the picture.

“At the onset we were pretty psyched because this guy’s got major label distribution,” Koslowski said.

It also helped that Sciara stayed on after the transition.

“We could still work with Camille, who we love,” Koslowski said. “We slept at Camille’s house when we would play up in New York. She’s an amazingly nice, sweet person and very giving.”

Koslowski said the band was given significantly more to record the follow-up based on buzz the band was getting at the time. J Robbins, of Jawbox and Burning Airlines fame, did the cover art and Drew Mazurek produced the album. The band even hired John Lay, who had previously worked with Squeeze, to manage the band.

“By that point we were having decent guarantees,” Koslowski said. “Those two years when I was on Grass I barely worked a real job. I wasn’t making a rockstar living or anything, but I was certainly able to pay my rent and utilities.”

Liquor Bike went on tour with Gas Huffer to promote the forthcoming record. On the tour Koslowski noticed there weren’t posters out and the band didn’t receive write-ups in the local press. To make matters worse, they never received CDs of The Beauty of Falling Apart to sell at shows. Koslowski said Grass had promised this.

“We were pretty confused," Koslowski said. “I mean our record had been mastered already, everything had been sent to the factory.”

Lay soon informed the band Sciara had been fired and the band had been dropped. Koslowski said the band decided to stay on the tour even after being kicked off the label. The band had old records and T-shirts to sell. They had put a lot of work into the tour and didn’t want to waste it.

Liquor Bike eventually released its third album on Merkin after failed meetings with Amphetamine Reptile, Columbia and Interscope. It was the band’s last before the members went their separate ways.

Seade was another band on on Grass that was unfortunately overlooked. Their lone album (Perf) is an underrated ’90s classic.

Prior to Meltzer, Koslowski said that he didn’t think there was any favoritism toward any one band despite the label being so prolific.

“I just think the woman loved music and wanted to spread that out to people,” Koslowski said of Sciara. “I think she legitimately wanted to help people, you know, help these bands out. She was nothing but giving.”

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Omaha

Mousetrap, an Omaha-based punk band, hoped to initially get a deal with Homestead when it sent in two 7” singles.

“Camille really liked our singles and got in touch with us.” Patrick Buchanan, Mousetrap’s singer/guitarist said in an email interview. “We developed a great relationship with her, and eventually she offered to sign us — we were given the opportunity to sign either with Homestead OR with Grass, which was a brand-new label at the time.”

Buchanan said the band thought it would possibly get overlooked in Homestead’s large stable of well-established bands and decided to sign with Grass.  He also said Sciara made a large difference.

“Camille was one of the coolest people we had ever met in ‘the business’ – she just seemed really genuine, straightforward and honest,” he said. “Those are the types of people we wanted to work with. So our relationship with Camille was probably the main thing that made us sign with Grass.”

Mousetrap would go on to release three albums on the label, starting with Cerebral Revolver in 1993. The band was a big influence on Commander Venus, an Omaha band featuring a young Connor Oberst.

“They were definitely a big deal in Omaha and everybody loved them,” Oberst said of Mousetrap in an episode of the Turned Out a Punk podcast earlier this year.

Commander Venus came in contact with Grass through Mousetrap. The band signed to the label when Oberst was only 14. The band also featured Rob Nansel, who would go on to co-found Saddle Creek Records. Oberst said the band recorded its first album, Do You Feel At Home, in 1995.

“That was a good experience and a learning experience,” Oberst said. “I also think it kind of made it more apparent that even if you do get an opportunity like that, you know, you’re a little fish in a big pond. And maybe people aren’t going to work as hard or care about it.”

He said that this was mitigated by having the support system of a local scene in Omaha. The band ended up releasing its 1995 debut on Lumberjack, which later became Saddle Creek. The band released one more album, The Uneventful Vacation, before Oberst formed Bright Eyes.

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Promoting growth

Alan Meltzer came into the picture with a retail background. He had previously owned Titus Oaks Records in Long Island. He went on to found CD One Stop in 1985, which was purchased by Alliance in 1993. Meltzer became Alliance’s president during this time but left the company in 1995. Meltzer acquired Grass in 1995 from Dutch East India Trading (the label’s owner/distributor), finalizing major label distribution through BMG in 1996.

“When I heard the Grass repertoire, I almost fell down,” Meltzer said in a 1996 Billboard Magazine article. “I heard so much good material.”

“Alan was shopping around looking to purchase an established label with an extensive catalog that he could pour endless money into,” Sciara said. “He originally wanted Homestead Records. A great label owned by Dutch East as well. But once he saw the contracts and issues with some of the ‘grey’ areas in them, he then moved on to Grass.”

Meltzer did have some legitimate interest in the label as an artistic venture.

“He absolutely was obsessed with the Wrens once he heard them and Commander Venus,” Sciara said. “He was sure with all his resources, money and big ass staff he could make them huge stars. He failed. Not the bands’ fault.”

Grass would have the name (and credibility) of an indie, but the corporate reach of a major. Meltzer looked at the new situation as the best of both worlds.

“We’re not a major label, but we’re not an undercapitalized, disorganized independent that’s out there on a wing and prayer,” Meltzer said. “We’re somewhere in the middle. We’re staffed, we have the organization, and we’ve got the know-how. I opted for major distribution because the majors are better at it.”

Grass kept Sciara on as a VP of A&R (artists and repertoire) and expanded Grass’ workforce to 20 in-house employees, according to the Billboard article. The label’s future looked bright. Bodine left Brainiac and formed O-Matic (also signed to Grass) when the change happened.

“…It seemed better – they had a nice office in Manhattan with an open stairwell area and glass walls,” Bodine said. “It was very modern and cool. The budget was much bigger. They hired more people and we felt like we had a good support system.”

“When we went there it felt like money,” Koslowski said.

Koslowski only met Meltzer once at a Grass Christmas party.

“He was a typical New York money guy when I met him,” Koslowski said. “I didn’t get a good vibe. He didn’t have that indie spirit that Camille had unfortunately.”

The meeting didn’t go well.

“I remember drinking a bit and messing with him,” Koslowski said. “I said ‘hey Alan I wanted to see if I could run this by you. You know that new Liquor Bike record we’re working on? We got the artwork but we just wanted to run the title by you and make sure it’s cool. We want to call it Eat My Fuck Asshole.’”

Meltzer and his wife were horrified, according to Koslowski.

Yellowing, patchy

In an oral history with Stereogum, Wrens bassist and singer Kevin Whelan said the band was picking up steam.

“So Secaucus came out and it started to do somewhat well and “Surprise Honeycomb” was starting to get recognized and played on different shows, and we thought that international fame was around the corner,” Whelan said.

And then the call came in.

“He [Meltzer] said, ‘Well, boys, I’m not going to give you any more money. If you don’t sign with me today, it’s over.’ So, I remember, we sat in the van, we looked at the empty gas tank and we were like, ‘Well, I guess we’re not signing, let’s get the credit cards out and see how we can get home.’”

According to the Wrens’ website bio, Meltzer wasn’t pleased.

“[Meltzer], infuriated, commences layoffs of involved record company personnel and vows that ‘the next band to walk through that door will be made famous – at any cost,’” the bio states. “The next band through the door is Creed. Grass Records becomes Wind-Up Records. Creed becomes famous at any cost.”

By the time of the Wind-Up transition, Moustrap had already fulfilled its contract when it released its third album The Dead Air Sound System.

“At that time, Mousetrap was not very active,” Buchanan said. “I think we had become rather disheartened by how much time and love we put into the band, while getting very little recognition on any type of national level. At that point we were physically and mentally exhausted by constant touring and recording, with very little in the way of tangible success to show for it. So we didn’t really have any relationship with the label by the time it became Wind-Up.”

When the label wasn’t as successful as Meltzer thought, he brought in Steve Lerner. This was effectively the end of Grass Records.

“I was let go along with 8 to 10 others when Meltzer brought in Steve Lerner to run the company,” Sciara said. “The new staff felt Grass was too much related to me so hence a name change.”

“With Lerner serving as his right-hand man, the duo transformed Wind-up into a $100 million-plus sales operation with multi-platinum acts like Evanescence and Creed,” a 2007 Billboard article said.

Death, new high-yield crops

Grass was rebranded as Wind-Up, a key player in the nu metal and post-grunge universe, in 1997. Many of the Grass bands were dropped to make room for the likes of Finger Eleven, Creed and Evanescence. Meltzer, who ran the label with his wife at the time Diana, finally found his cash machine.

“I was extremely happy because, although Creed was a mega-seller and saved his label, I wanted nothing to do with that and the direction the label was taking,” Sciara said. “Not knocking it. You need artists like that to sustain a label that had an enormous payroll and nice offices. I totally get it, it’s a business. But I was happy running a small label with smaller contacts and cooler bands that didn't have to compromise their sound to write a ‘hit.’ That’s what he was always looking for.”

The transition to Wind-Up in 1997 did have some overlap with former Grass artists. The second Commander Venus album was released by Wind-Up and Thick (with a later release on Saddle Creek). Pollen, a rough-edged pop-punk act that had released two albums on Grass, dropped Peach Tree on Wind-Up. Baboon’s sophomore album Secret Robot Control was also released in 1997 on the new label.

Slowpoke’s Virgin Stripes, the final vestige of Grass Records, was a co-release with DGC in 1998. The album didn’t break the band, but it’s not a stretch to imagine it could have (especially since it boasted a song as infectious as “Belladonna”). The album retains some of band’s outsider noisy energy, but delivers it in a package palatable enough for the post-grunge crowd. Past this point, Wind-Up focused mostly on its new sound.

Koslowski didn’t initially know Wind-Up was the successor to Grass. One day someone mentioned to him that he was labelmates with Creed.

“I was like ‘wow, OK I guess he got his hit,’” Koslowski said.  

Meltzer died in 2011 at 67. He made headlines by leaving $1 to his chauffeur and $500,000 to his doorman. Bodine saw this as frustrating because of how he left things with other Grass bands.

“He owed lots of bands money so it’s just really fucked up that he didn’t pay them/us. Liquor Bike did get theirs before he died only because they were persistent,” said Bodine.

In 2013 Wind-Up was purchased by Bicycle Music Company with distribution by Concord Music Group. In 2015 the two companies merged to form Concord Bicycle Music. Craft Recordings manages the label’s reissues.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/wZBpr1tDktI

Rare strain

Aside from Brainiac and The Wrens, many of the bands on the label aren’t on streaming platforms. The physical releases on Grass are mostly out of print. A sea of fantastic experimental indie music remains in this gray area. This doesn’t seem to be changing.

“Unfortunately, I haven’t a clue about if there are plans of Wind-Up re-releasing any back catalog,” Sciara said. “It’s sad really. Holding peoples’ artistic work hostage or just ignoring it seems cruel. Hopefully Wind-Up did the right thing and gave them back their masters, rights etc. Or at least license it to someone else to release.”

The three Mousetrap albums are stuck in this place.

“I wish more people had the chance to hear our music, so yeah I wish it was easily available,” said Buchanan. “Sure, we wanted to be popular — but the most important thing for us was that we made the music we wanted to make. We always did things our way — for ourselves, with no regrets. So even if the albums are harder to get, we’ll always have the memories — and those who were there to witness it will, too.”

Liquor Bike’s lawyer was able to secure the master tapes and artwork for The Beauty of Falling Apart with no questions asked. The band also has the master tapes for Neon Hoop Ride.  

“Crazily enough, Grass did not make us buy Beauty of Falling Apart from them,” Koslowski said. “I have heard from some of my fellow Grass artists that they wanted to charge an incredible amount of money.”

Neon Hoop Ride was remastered and briefly available on streaming services. The album was only available digitally and did not get a physical rerelease.

Greener pastures

Following her departure from Grass, Sciara started Ten23 (Oct. 23, 1996 was the day she was fired from Grass). The label released The Wren’s EP 1135 before folding.

“It seemed like a great idea,” she said. “Didn't put out anything else after that release. It was an expensive endeavor starting a label from scratch, so to speak, and at the time I was unemployed.”

From there she went on to work at the Knitting Factory label group and eventually Narnack Records. She uprooted from N.Y. to move to L.A. to work at the latter. She eventually ended up back in N.Y. where she was a manager at Petland Discounts for 12 years until it closed in 2019.

Buchanan has gone on to release music as Vicious Lovers. Mousetrap has plans to release new music for the first time in 20 years according to Buchanan. Some of Mousetrap’s music can be streamed here:

Michelle Bodine went on to play guitar in Shesus, which was signed to Narnack. The band released an album and an EP before splitting up. Bodine has since been participating in Brainiac reunion shows and was featured in the Brainiac documentary Transmissions from Zero.

David Koslowski went on to play in the post-rock band Vivid Low Sky and the power-pop band Gerty. He currently owns a coffee shop/record store in Baltimore called Baby’s on Fire.

“I loved every aspect of being on Grass, except for the very end,” Koslowski said. “I also loved how diverse Camille had the label. A lot of friends from that time from those bands, I’m still friends with them. It was like a really cool little group of people that all got to share in something for as brief of a time period as it was.”

If you have questions, information or concerns I can be reached at powers3317@gmail.com.

CORRECTION: A previous version of this article spelled David’s last name as Kozlowski. It’s actually Koslowski. Also, J. Robbins just did the cover art for the band’s third album. Drew Mazurek actually produced it. Godplow is a great band but they’re from Minneapolis, not Baltimore.

[iamnotawomanimagod]

Manic Review - From “Least-Best” to Best

Halsey released her third studio album on 1/17/2020, and it is easily her best. I’ve wanted to talk about it, but first, I need to figure out how I feel about each track in relation to the others. So this is mostly for me, but I’d love to hear how other people are feeling too!

I love all of these songs, I feel so blessed with this album, which is why this goes from “least-best” to “best”, not “worst.” 

(I know that’s kind of splitting semantic hairs, but I refuse to disrespect this album, lmao.)

So, without further ado, here are my favorite songs on Manic, starting with the one I like the least:

16 - “Alanis’s Interlude”

This is THE bisexual anthem we’ve all been waiting for from Halsey. It’s cool, sexy, and features some stellar vocals from both Alanis and Halsey. It ranks so low for me only because I’m not a huge fan of the chorus, the machine drums, or the melody, despite loving the message. But the verses are fire, and so are the vocals.

15 - “Still Learning”

I think this track will be a slow-grower for me, the way “Devil in Me” was. Maybe it’s just because it comes on the heels of the deeply, deeply impactful “More” - but I found this didn’t strike the chord I thought it would. It’s a beautiful song, though, and very meaningful to Halsey’s personal journey. I think seeing it live might change my mind about it.

14 - “Finally // beautiful stranger” 

This might be the sweetest side of Halsey that we’ve ever seen, especially when it comes to romantic love. The fact that it was inspired by Yungblud makes my heart ache a bit. I really love the duality of the different versions of Ashley in the video. That being said, the genre/style of song isn’t my personal favorite. Her vocals are amazing, though, and some of the lyrics are really poetic. I know this will be an especially tender one live, in front of a Halsey crowd. I can just picture everyone swaying and singing along.

13 - “SUGA’s Interlude” 

This interlude is such a soft, sad moment on the album, and it fits really well before “More.” SUGA’s Interlude is all about the way fame has changed both artists, and about how they’ll know when it’s time to step away from the spotlight - and how that might change them. SUGA has excellent flow, and Halsey’s delicate, pining vocals on the chorus is a perfect complement to his introspective rapping. It’s a really sweet song, and part of why it works so well on the album is because it creates such a heartfelt prelude to “More”. The song all about leaving fame behind, followed by the song about loving her unborn child, and how she badly wants to be a mother...gives me chills, man, literal chills. I think I’d like it more if I spoke Korean, but honestly, Korean Halsey fans deserve somethin’ special, so I’m okay with it.

12 - “You should be sad”

I still don’t know if I quite “buy” Y’allsey, but I can’t deny that this is a really fun song. Singing along to the lyrics is so satisfying, and the music video provided us with some serious Looks. The guitar riff between the chorus and the verses makes me feel things, and so does the line: “I’m so glad I never ever had a baby with you,” especially after hearing “More”. I like this song a lot, but compared to the rest of the album, it’s not in my top ten. I think it’ll be a really, really fun one live, though.

11 - “Without Me”

This song and I share a birthday! It’s also where Manic really began, although we had no idea that was the case, at the time. This was the first time Halsey wrote from such a specific and personal place, knowing we would all immediately recognize who the song targeted and why. She’s used this song brilliantly since then, coming up with a dozen different interpretations and set pieces, performing it while chained to a post, while revealing the messages of her cheating ex, while dancing with a beautiful girl, and even more. (It helps a lot that she performed this song with Jade Chynoweth, one of my all-time favorite dancers, and responded to the backlash of that performance by doing it again, but even gayer, just a few weeks later.) We owe a lot to this song. And, as it turns out, it really fits in with the story of Manic, and with the tone, from both a sonic and thematic perspective. I’m still a little tired of it, though, which is why it ranks so low. But - credit where it’s due!

10 - “Dominic’s Interlude” 

This one surprised me, although I went in with zero expectations, not knowing who Dominic Fike was. I wish Halsey was actually in this song, but other than that, I think it’s a great interlude. Not to mention: “If you’re looking for signs then you should know, there’s power in the words that you’re thinking.” That’s an incredible line, hit me hard. 

9 - “Ashley”

I both love and hate what this song means, because it scares the crap out of me. The way she described it as “a cautious goodbye” in an interview... It’s absolutely a letter to her fans, about Halsey, about who Halsey is, and who Ashley is, and how that balancing act both breaks her and makes her thrive. She can’t keep doing this forever. She knows how much she means to us, and this song is all about how heavy and scary that burden is, but that she’s committed to it, for now. Ending with that line from Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind was perfect. We’re the ones who shouldn’t assign her our peace of mind, y’know? Her vocals are stunning, though, and I think it’s the strongest opener from any of her albums. This song reminds me of a much less depressing version of “Batter Up” by Brand New, and I wouldn’t be surprised if it influenced her a bit.

8 - “Graveyard”

This song really feels like the older sister of “Without Me”. I love the racing speed of the melody and the rhythm, the way everything is layered so manically and frantically over the verses. It’s actually really easy to get lost in the musicality of this one, even though the lyrics are incredible. I think the music video is my all-time favorite of Halsey’s, because I love all the symbolism in it, and it was really trippy to see her without tattoos. I’ll consider this one a bop for a long, long time.

7 - “clementine” 

We’ve had this song for a little while, and it’s been one of my favorites. I was pretty sure it was going to stay that way, even after the album came out, but Halsey surprised me. That being said, I still love the way this song manages to be both playful and petulant, spirited and sad. It has some really beautiful images, and the music video is so pretty. 

6 - “I HATE EVERYBODY” 

We love a song full of contradictions! This song takes the humor/self-deprecation that started in “Clementine” and “Forever... (is a long time)” and turns it anthemic. The transition from “Dominic’s Interlude” to this song is so perfect, it’s hard not to listen to them one after the other. Halsey once again proves her lyrical prowess and ability to write a relatable bop, which is really what we love her for in the end, right? I love the way the song starts out pretty simply, than swells up into something epic.

5 - “3am”

I love this genre, so much, and I think Halsey completely nails it. This song wouldn’t make anyone bat an eye if you played it in 2007. Most other Halsey songs can’t claim that, and since I’m a sucker for the aughties, this one lives high on my list. It reminds me of P!nk, Avril Lavigne, and Paramore. The lyrics are super relatable, and I love the chorus and the bridge. It’s not the best lyrically, but that bridge honestly makes up for what the rest of the song lacks. Can’t wait to scream that one live! I do wish John Mayer wasn’t rambling on the end, but I also love how that leads into “Without Me”. 

4 - “929″ 

This might sound strange, but I love how this song starts with just Ashley talking; she’s speaking through laughter, challenging her friend playfully. This song feels so real. I love the stream-of-consciousness style of lyrics and the way the melody plays into that. Her voice reminds me so much of early, early Halsey - songs like “Tilt You Back” and “For Ruby”. I can relate so much to some of the things she says, and I love the way it ends. It’s such an interesting contrast to the way her previous albums concluded, too - “Young God” and “Hopeless” are both such epic, sweeping tracks. Ending her most personal album yet with such a tender ode to self-acceptance, and self-discovery, is such a beautiful way to show how much she’s grown, as a person, a songwriter, and a singer. This song makes me nostalgic, proud, happy, just a little sad, and feel so at peace.

3 - “More”

I almost don’t really have words for this song. Knowing Halsey’s story, her very honest and public experiences with infertility and endometriosis, made this song hit me a lot harder than I ever expected. I still can’t quite get through it without crying. It’s an incredibly beautiful song. Painfully, painfully honest, about a topic that’s so rarely openly discussed in pop culture. I don’t even want kids, but the yearning she shows, the hope she still has, the way she says that she’s loved her future child more than anything, and has always loved them; the reference to having already bought baby clothes; the sound of the sonogram machine, and the way it sounds like she’s singing to her baby from outside the womb at the end; it guts me. And again, I don’t want kids. I never expected this kind of honesty or tenderness from her. It’s such a special song, truly. (For the record, I listened to it again to write this and am fully weeping once more.)

2 - “Forever... (is a long time)” 

What a surprise this song was! I think it perfectly captures a certain kind of self-destructive behavior that so many of us end up falling into when it comes to relationships. The way the song goes from happy and plucky to this burgeoning feeling of dread, of spiraling down into those dark thoughts that trip all of us up from time to time. It goes from a love song to a break-up song in a matter of seconds, and the transition is spine-tinglingly perfect. The storm building in the background, starting with thunder and dissipating into rain. The way her voice comes back in with the same melody, but minor instead of major. The way the song sort of disintegrates into chaos, and into the realization: “talk to your man...tell him he’s got bad news comin’.” (This is definitely about the Yungblud breakup, right? Nevermind, my heart can’t take that. Gonna pretend I didn’t just realize that.)

1 - “killing boys” 

Jennifer’s Body is one of my absolute favorite movies, unironically. I love that Halsey loves it too, enough to include lines from it in the most badass boss bitch song she’s written since “Nightmare”. Her vocals are incredible (those high notes!) - the lyrics are the perfect blend of regretful and rageful - the beat, melodies, and overall composition just fills me up with this impossibly strong sense of “fuck yeah, fuck you.” I don’t have the words to describe how this song makes me feel. I had high hopes, based on the title, and it did not disappoint. This song has some of the cleverest lines on the entire record, and it makes me feel a way that no other song does. That’s what seals it at #1, for me (for now.)

Feel free to reply with yours, or tag me in your own review!! I’m really excited to see some of the more detailed opinions people have, now that the initial “IT’S HERE” hype has started to subside.

stream MANIC by HALSEY today

[lacquerware]

2020 Recap - My Year in Gaming

2020. What a year for video games. I had big plans for last year, but in the end I did very little besides play video games, and I don’t think I’m alone there since we were all stuck at home looking for a way out of reality. I wanted to do a year-end recap as I’ve done sporadically in past years, but this one will be different than the typical “Games of the Year” format because despite all the games I played in 2020, almost none of them came out in 2020, and some of the things that defined my year in gaming weren't even games. 

Resident Evil 3 Remake (PS4)

RE3 was one of the only games I played in 2020 that didn’t coincide with the deadly pandemic's spread across the US. RE3 is, of course, a game about the spread of a deadly virus in Anytown, USA. It was an appetizer, I guess. 

When the Resident Evil 2 remake dropped in 2019, there were some things I loved about it, and a few things that felt like steps back from the original. I feel much the same about RE3. I had also theorized that a Resident Evil 3 remake would be better off as RE2 DLC than as a separate full-length game, and considering how short RE3 turned out, with some of the best sections of hte original cut entirely (namely, the clock tower), I stand by my theory. 

Oh well, at least Jill gets this rad gun, which for the time being is the closest thing to a new Lost Planet we can hope for anytime soon.

Sekiro (PS4)

Sekiro is the first video game I ever Platinumed. This is partly because conquering the base game was such a spartan exercise that going the extra mile to get the Platinum didn’t seem so bad, but it’s also surely a result of the pandemic. I needed a project and a big win. Who didn't? 

I wrote at length about why I like Sekiro more than every other modern FromSoft game, and also about the game’s cherry-on-top moment that reminded me of blowing up Hitler’s face in Bionic Commando. Please read them!

Death Stranding (PS4)

Release date notwithstanding, this was obviously the Game of 2020. I wrote about it here, here, and here. This game bears the distinction of being the second one I ever Platinumed. It took 150 hours. Only then did I learn I had a hoverboard.

Streets of Rage 4 (PS4)

This is the only 2020 game I played for more than a few hours. In fact, I cleared the entire game at least five times. I still don’t think it captures the gritty aesthetic of the prior Streets of Rages (nor even tries to), but this is probably the best-feeling bup I've played. Huge bonus points for finally bringing back Adam, but in the end I found it hard not to pick Blaze every time.

Blaster Master Zero 2 (Switch)

What impressed me about this sequel from Inti Creates was that it wasn’t just more of the same, even though that would've been fine. BMZ2 builds on its already excellent predecessor with a catchy new format where players can freely cruise the cosmos and stages take the varied form of planets—some big and sprawling, others short and sweet. Hopping at will from planet to planet without ever knowing what experiences and treasure each one held felt like system jumping in No Man’s Sky and island hopping in The Legend of Zelda: Phantom Hourglass, both of which felt like opening presents.

Dragon Force (Saturn)

Charming, satisfying, and addictive as a bag of chips. Unlike a bag of chips, when it’s over, you can do it all again. And again. And it’ll be different each time! This might be the first strategy game I've truly loved. Better late than never.

The PC Engine Mini

The PC Engine/TurboGrafx-16 Mini seems a particularly justifiable mini-console for people outside Japan because so many missed these consoles entirely, the games are hard to obtain, and the lineup includes titles spanning the entire convoluted Turbo/PC Engine ecosystem—the TurboGrafx-CD/CD-ROM², Super CD-ROM², Arcade CD-ROM² and SuperGrafx, in addition to plain, old standard HuCard games. I myself didn’t know the first thing about these systems before. It’s like reliving the nineties again for the first time. 

Most of the titles included are simple action games that don't require a command of Japanese, but make no mistake: being able to understand Snatcher and TokiMemo does make me feel like an elite special person worth more than many of you. 

(Side note: From a gender representation perspective, the difference between Snatcher and Death Stranding is stark. Virtually every interaction with every woman or girl in Snatcher is decorated with ways to sexually harass her. Guess someone finally had a conversation with our favorite auteur.)

A Gaming PC

I’d threatened to transition to PC gaming for years after beholding the framerate difference between the console and PC versions of DmC in 2012, and last July I finally took the leap, buying an ASUS “Republic of Gamers” (ugh) laptop with an NVIDIA GeForce RTX 2070 Max-Q GPU. It seems like consoles are getting more PC-like all the time, especially with all these half-step iterations that splinter performance and sometimes even the feature set (à la the New 3DS and Switch Lite), so with the impending new generation seemed like a fine time to change course.

In the half-year since, I’ve barely played a single PC game more recent than 2013, but just replaying PS3-era games at high settings has been like rediscovering them for the first time. 

I also finally experienced keyboard-and-mouse shooting and understand now why PC gamers think they're better than everyone else. Max Payne is a completely different game with a mouse. Are all shooters like this??

The USPS

Early in the year, I rediscovered my childhood game shop, Starland, which is now  an online hub known as eStarland.com with a brick-and-mortar showroom. To my delight, it has become one of the best and most modestly priced sources for import Saturn games in the country, and I scored Shining Force III’s second and third episodes, long missing from my collection, for a mere ten bucks each!  

In June, I treated myself to a trio of Saturn imports from eStarland: the tactics-meets-dating-sim mashup Sakura Taisen 2, the nicely presented RTS space opera Quo Vadis 2, and beloved gothic dungeon crawler Baroque. Miraculously, this haul amounted to just around thirty dollars total. Less miraculously, they never arrived. This was the second time I’d had something lost in the mail in my entire life, and also the second time that month. Something was wrong with the USPS, and it wasn’t just COVID pains. We would soon learn Trump had been actively working to sabotage one of the nation’s oldest and most reliable institutions in a plot to compromise the upcoming presidential election.

Frankly it’s a miracle there’s still such a thing as “delivery” at all, and a few missing video games is the last of my worries considering what caused it, but nevertheless this was an experience in my gaming life that could not have happened any other year. I won’t forget it.

*By the way, USPS reimbursed me for the insured value of the missing order, which was fifty bucks. So I actually profited a little off the experience.

Mega Everdrive Pro

I love collecting for the Genesis and Mega Drive, but I will not pay hundreds of dollars for a video game that retailed for about sixty.  The publishers never asked for that, and the developers won’t see a (ragna)cent of the money. I'm also far less inclined to start collecting for Sega CD, since the hardware is notoriously breakable, the cases are huge and also breakable, and the library just isn't that good. 

Still, I'd been increasingly curious about the add-on as an interesting piece of Sega history, so when I learned Ukranian mad scientist KRIKzz had released a new Mega Everdrive that doubled as a Sega CD FPGA, I finally took the plunge into the world of flash carts. This has proven a great way to play some of the Mega Drive’s big-ticket rarities I will never buy—namely shmups like Advanced Busterhawk Gley Lancer and Eliminate Down—as well as try out prospective additions to the collection. I never would have discovered the phenomenal marvel of engineering and synth composition that is Star Cruiser without this thing, but now that I have, it’s high on the shopping list.

The Mega Everdrive Pro is functionally nearly identical to TerraOnion’s “Mega SD” cartridge, but slightly less expensive, comes in a “normal” cartridge shell instead of the larger Virtua Racing-style one, and supports a single hardworking dude in Ukraine rather than a company with reportedly iffy customer service.

Twitch

Getting a PC also resolved issues that had long prevented me from achieving a real streaming setup, and much of my gaming life in 2020 was about ramping up my streaming efforts. I even made Affiliate in about a month. Streaming has been a great creative outlet and distraction, as well as a way to connect with other people during the COVID depression and structure my gaming time. Find me every Monday through Thursday 8-11pm Eastern at twitch.tv/lacquerware.  

Metroid: Other M (Dolphin)

PC ownership also gave me access to the versatile Dolphin emulator, liberating a handful of great Wii exclusives from their disposable battery-powered prison. 

One of the Wii games I fired up on Dolphin was Metroid: Other M, a game I’d always wanted to try but had been dissuaded by years of bad publicity and the fact that I never had any goddamn batteries. I know I should temper what I’m about to say by acknowledging that I was playing at 1080p/60fps on a PS4 controller so my experience was automatically a vast improvement over that of all Wii players, but I’m increasingly confident Metroid: Other M was the most fun I’ve ever had playing a Metroid game. I haven’t decided yet if I’m willing to die on this hill, but I will just say that if you like the Metroidvania genre in general and aren’t particularly attached to the Metroid series’ story or its habit of making you wander aimlessly for hours, there’s a very high chance you will enjoy Other M—especially if you play it on Dolphin.

Don't Starve Together (PC)

Don't Starve is the only game my friend Jason plays, so last year I tried to get into it with him. I respect this game's singular devotion to the concept of survival, but make no mistake: every session of Don't Starve ends with you starving to death. Or freezing. Or getting stomped by a giant deity of the forest. The entire game is staving off death until it inevitably comes. Even when death comes, you can revive infinitely (in whatever mode we were playing), which means even death is not an end goal. There is no end goal. You don't even have the leeway to "play" and create your own meaning as you do in similarly zen  games like Dead Rising. 

Don't Starve is a game for people for whom hard work is the ultimate reward in and of itself. Don't Starve told me something about Jason. 

G-Darius (PS1)

In the early fall, Sony announced they were dropping PS3, PSP, and Vita support from the browser and mobile versions of their PSN Store, and since the PS3 version of the store app runs like a solar-powered parking meter in Seattle, I decided this was my last chance to stock up on Japanese PSN gems. 

Among my final haul, the PS1 port of G-Darius proved an instant favorite. Take down the usual cast of mechanized fish in a vibrant, chunky, low-poly style that perfectly inhabits the constraints of the original PlayStation hardware. I believe this is the first Darius game that lets you get into giant beam duels with the bosses, which is quite definitely one of the coolest things a video game has ever let you do. The PS1 port is also surprisingly feature-rich, including some easier difficulty levels that present an actually surmountable challenge for non-savants.

This one’s coming to the upcoming Darius Cozmic Revelation collection on Switch alongside DARIUSBURST, a good-ass romp in its own right.

Red Entertainment

In my effort to shine a tiny spotlight on some of the unsung Interesting Games of gaming, I found myself drawn again and again to the work of Red Entertainment. First there were cavechild headbutt simulator Bonk’s Adventure and twin shmups Gates of Thunder and Lords of Thunder on the PC Engine Mini. Then I streamed full playthroughs of the PS2’s best samurai-era, off-brand 3D Castlevania, Blood Will Tell and the Trigun-adjacent stand-‘n-gun, Gungrave: Overdose. Then I was dazzled by Bonk’s Adventure’s futuristic spin-off cute-‘em-up, Air Zonk, which was also sneakily tucked away on my PC Engine Mini in the “TurboGrafx-16” section. It turned out all these games were made by the same miracle developer responsible for Bujingai, the stylish PS2 wushu game starring Gackt and a household name here at the Lacquerware estate. How prolific can one team be???

Month of Cyberpunk

In November, I started toying with the idea of themed months on my Twitch channel with “Cyberpunk month.” It was supposed to be a build-up to Cyberpunk 2077’s highly anticipated November release, but holy shit that didn’t happen, did it? Still, I always find myself gravitating toward this genre in November, I guess because I associate November with gloom (even though this year it was sunny almost every day). A month is a long time to adhere to a single theme, but cyberpunk is such a well-served niche in gaming that I could easily start an all-cyberpunk Twitch channel. The fact that we’re so spoiled with choice makes Cyberpunk 2077’s terrible launch all the more embarrassing. Here are just some of the games I played (and streamed!) in November:

Ghostrunner Shadowrun (Genesis) RUINER Remember Me Transistor Rise of the Dragon (Sega CD) Shadowrun (Mega CD) Cyber Doll (Saturn) Binary Domain Shadowrun Returns Blade Runner (PC) Deus Ex: Human Revolution Deus Ex: Mankind Divided Observer

Shadowrun on the Genesis gets my top pick, but the two most recent Deus Ex games are great alternatives for those looking for something in the vein of 2077 that isn’t infested with termites.

Lost Planet 2

Every year. I played through it twice in 2020.

Dead Rising 4

I slept on this one too long. While it's a far cry from the original game, it's easily the most fun I've had with a Christmas game since Christmas NiGHTS. This is the game a lot of people thought they were getting when they bought the original Dead Rising with their new Xbox 360--goofy, indulgent, and pressure-free.

Devil May Cry 5: Vergil (PS4)

Vergil dropped for last-gen consoles in December and breathed a whole lot of life into a game that was already at the head of its class.

Nioh 2

I’ve only played a few hours of Nioh 2 because I promised my friend I’d co-op it with him and wouldn’t play ahead. But he’s a grad student with two small children. Nevertheless, Nioh 2 is my Game of 2020.

And that's it! Guess I'll spend 2021 playing games that came out last year, and maybe eventually getting vaccinated? Please?