#i need a separate drama centered around this household

[gongyu]

Minjae and his future family — Cheer Up (2022)

[littleeyesofpallas]

I need to either be a lot more patient and hope my willpower can just brute force its way thru the worst of this character gen slog where I can't focus on just one thing at a time, and thus every only progresses at a fucking snail's pace... or I need to simplify the pool of NPCs I'm working with...

At the center of everything is the little lord; the quiet, meek son of the reigning lord that the player characters are tasked for various reasons with taking care of as his entourage

There's the largely narratively absent dad, the vacuum of whose absence should be the driving force of the plot...

The dead mom whose mysterious legacy needs to be discovered as a B plot to eventually merge with the main plot.

The grandmother who is just a weird spooky withered mummy of a woman enshrined at the top of the family hierarchy murmuring inaudible orders to her personal attendants all the time...

The father's younger brother, a decadent lay about who long ago resigned to being second best to his brother, and so has no aspirations. But beneath the lazy demeanor he's actually very politically perceptive and takes full advantage of the fact that as a second son unlikely to even inherit, he's frequently regarded as a non threat politically, and so a lot of chatter is allowed to carelessly make its way to him. He's got eyes and ears all around the imperial court but he generally only ever uses it to quietly keep himself out of the way of incoming trouble.

The uncle's wife is a self serious icequeen type and a workaholic pulling the weight of her husband's lack of ambition. She was of low birth and because of the lack of expectations on him as the second son he was allowed to marry down, although not without having to fight for it first. So although her husband is not at all compelled to do much work, even on her behalf, he happily throws the family's money at all her personal projects, be they private business or administrative, and just kinda cheers for her from the sidelines. IN spite of their mismatched personality types they are very much in love with one another.

I debated on giving them a kid, a niece/nephew for the little lord. I considered that maybe she wouldn't be able to have kids of her own and so they'd have an adopted kid. If only as a little added drama to the line of succession. But then i considered giving them a whole orphanage instead as their own private little Baker St. Irregulars.

I was going to have there be a middle child, a sister to the father... but I think I mistakenly rolled her notes into a different character at some point without realizing it... And given my issue with NPC bloat as is, I dunno if I want to bring her back or not...

The evil step mom who married the absentee dad for his political standing and is blatantly scheming something, and hates the little lord.

The step mom's parents, heads of a separate lesser household with cutthroat ambitions on climbing the social ladder thru any means. Both husband and wife are blatant villain types, but despite all the things they're absolutely willing to do, and all the things they definitely plan to do, they're not the big bads, just opportunistic shitbags.

the step mom's younger brother, a talented swordsman with a sadistic streak. Selfish and lacking in any sense of responsibility, but unfortunately not stupid, just impulsive and self absorbed. He has never been to war and naively yearns to become a war hero without understanding the gravity of that idea.

Mother's family who claim regency rights to the little lord's ascent in absence of his being of age or showing promise as a head of family. this being spear headed by the mother's older sister, a boisterous aunty type with power, ambition, experience, and all the social/political backing to support it. She's not a "bad" person per say but her interest in the little lord is quite transparently political first and foremost and her extroverted nature makes it hard to tell how much of her amiable demeanor is genuine.

Aunty's husband is a big jolly fellow with a glowing military record behind him. He's very active with his entourage and throws frequently banquets and social events, but has little penchant for courtly politics, which his wife happily takes care of instead. Also he is gay and involved with one of his generals, and his wife is fully aware. In fact the wife knew when she was arranged to marry him that he wasn't interested in her sexually, and wasn't engaged politically himself, and so ditched the family's typical political marriage tactics and instead won his respect as a warrior. The two are by their own mutual admission one another's best friend.

The dead mom also had a younger sister, a ditzy bachelorette taking her time sizing up her options before selling her freedom away for a political career as her family has raised her for. She isn't so heart broken by it as much as she is just bored with all the offers she's been given. She has a reputation for sleeping around, but it's not clear with whom. I might make her a lesbian whose just making all her male suitors send her their best lady attendants as part of her screening process. But maybe that's a little too gratuitously salacious...

And then there were supposed to be 4 chief generals serving under the father who would be available as assistance to the little lord. There'd be one for each main element apart from Void, but I never got around to fleshing them out all that much. I considered making one the father's lover on the side as part of a poly thing with the mother so he'd be a secondary option to the mother's family to dig up some extra lore. And one would sort of be the father's own teacher, a much older man. Honestly they could've been the same general, like I sadi, I never ironed out the details... Classic 4 Heavenly Kings trope was to be the backbone.

AND THEN I had a mix of general stat blocks and skill sets that I wanted to use to make the rivals and allies in court, completely outside the little lord's family structure, but they'd come about much later in the plot so I was putting them off. But you can see how I burnt myself out with this...

The main plot I was working on was to start the players off on an adventure with blank/generic character sheets, and as I walked them through bits of their day to day life as teens living and/or working under the little lord's household, I'd let them outline their defining traits and pass times and build their character sheets that way. Have them attend swordsmanship class together, have a little tournament with wooden swords, race around the estate, sneak into places they shouldn't be, talk with parents, with servants, and with commoners out on the street of town, etc... Get a feel for where they all fit into the flow and order of things before committing to them to a definitive career path.

They'd go on one specific adventure as kids that would sort of be a big Chekov's gun; they'd overhear the household staff talk about being sent out late at night to fetch food for the pregnant second wife, and there being something spooky out by the old storehouses on the edge of the estate. So the kids would sneak out there one night under a full moon and find a child around their own age hiding out in the storehouse and eating the food. I'd prompt them on how to handle it, and if they choose benevolence, the child would promise to repay them one day. Later they'd find out one of two things; either that there had been an escaped prostitute from a local brothel and authorities were looking for them, or that the step mother had given birth in the night. I can't decide which, or both.

The brothel owner would be a tall intimidating fierce faced oiran with a bad attitude, even in the face of a samurai household. and somewhere down the line it would be revealed that she was a fox spirit, and so was the child that escaped her care, and that they'd been using the brothel as a means of swapping shapeshifting foxes out for various samurai to infiltrate their households to spy and sabotage political affairs. So it would help cast this big shadow of doubt over what I hope would by that point be a big cast of secondary characters for the players to pick and choose who they can trust from. I sort of wanted to try and construct a scenario where the most loyal or amicable allies would be the top of the suspect list, while the most openly hostile rivals would be the most "trustworthy" if only because their motives would be too obvious and counterintuitive to being spies.

Anyway there would be a time skip as the kids grow up, and we'd resume on the week leading up to the little lord's coming of age. The father would have been away on some ill defined military campaign at the edge of the kingdom, and as we await his return the family would father for a festival, and we'd get to revisit some of the favored skills of the party now as young adults. Swordsman ship duels and archery tournaments and horseback riding and such celebrating the little lord's ascent. But then there'd be word from the front that the father has gone missing, and while they'd keep in on the down low to finish out the ceremony, when push come to shove there would be a family meeting about what to do, and in the heated debate that would last days of courtly drama, there would be whispers of an assassination attempt, and there would be the opportunity to smuggle the little lord out of the house to avoid this confrontation...

..and then that's where i hit the big fork in the road where, without a real campaign and real players, I'm forced to design two WILDLY different routes with equal intensity having no idea which of the two would be completely scrapped. Like, to flee the house and seek refuge with some political allies is the option I sort of prefer if I really had to choose, but then the broiling political drama of standing his ground and staking his claim while his entourage fend off assailants both political and physical is very much an option.

All this and I didn't even decide on a real clan for this core family, because I figured I'd ask my (nonexistant) players for a group preference after going over some cursory worldbuilding briefs, and then nudge the attitudes and alignments of the characters I'd already built to sort of fit the larger Clan ethos.

[be-gay-do-heists]

hello yall :) the holy month of elul started last night, which is typically a time for contemplation, so since it is impossible for me to stop thinking about leverage, i decided to write an essay. hope anyone interested in reading it enjoys, and that it makes at least a little sense!! spoilers for leverage redemption

-----

Leverage, Judaism, and “Doing the Work”: An Essay for Elul

When it comes to Elul and the approaching High Holidays, Leverage might seem like an odd topic to meditate on.

The TNT crime drama that ran from 2008-2012, and which released a new season this summer following its renewal, centers on a group of found-family thieves who help the victims of corporations and oligarchs (sometimes based on real-world examples), using wacky heists and cons to bring down the rich and powerful. In one episode, the team’s clients want to reclaim their father’s prized Glimt piece that had been stolen in the Shoah and never returned, but aside from this and the throwaway lines and jokes standard for most mainstream television, there’s not a ton textually Jewish about Leverage. However, despite this, I have found that the show has strong resonance among Jewish fans, and lots of potential for analysis along Jewish themes. This tends to focus on one character in particular: the group’s brilliant, pop culture-savvy, and personable hacker, Alec Hardison, played by the phenomenally talented Aldis Hodge.

I can’t remember when or where I first encountered a reading of Hardison as Jewish, but not only is this a somewhat popular interpretation, it doesn’t feel like that much of a leap. In the show itself, Hardison has a couple of the aforementioned throwaway lines that potentially point to him being Jewish, even if they’re only in service of that moment’s grift. It’s hard to point to what exactly makes reading Hardison as Jewish feel so natural. My first guess is the easy way Hardison fits into the traditional paradigms of Jewish masculinity explored by scholars such as Daniel Boyarin (2). Most of the time, the hacker is not portrayed as athletic or physical; he is usually the foil to the team’s more physically-adept characters like fighter Eliot, or thief Parker. Indeed, Hardison’s strength is mental, expressed not only through his computer wizardry but his passions for science, technology, music, popular media, as well as his studious research into whatever scenario the group might come up against. In spite of his self-identification as a “geek,” Hardison is nevertheless confident, emotionally sensitive, and secure in his masculinity. I would argue he is representative of the traditional Jewish masculine ideal, originating in the rabbinic period and solidified in medieval Europe, of the dedicated and thoughtful scholar (3). Another reason for popular readings of Hardison as Jewish may be the desire for more representation of Jews of color. Although mainstream American Jewish institutions are beginning to recognize the incredible diversity of Jews in the United States (4), and popular figures such as Tiffany Haddish are amplifying the experiences of non-white Jews, it is still difficult to find Jews of color represented in popular media. For those eager to see this kind of representation, then, interpreting Hardison, a black man who places himself tangential to Jewishness, in this way is a tempting avenue.

Regardless, all of the above remains fan interpretation, and there was little in the text of the show that seriously tied Judaism into Hardison’s identity. At least, until we got this beautiful speech from Hardison in the very first episode of the renewed show, directed at the character of Harry Wilson, a former corporate lawyer looking to atone for the injustice he was partner to throughout his career:

“In the Jewish faith, repentance, redemption, is a process. You can’t make restitution and then promise to change. You have to change first. Do the work, Harry. Then and only then can you begin to ask for forgiveness. [...] So this… this isn’t the win. It’s the start, Harry.”

I was floored to hear this speech, and thrilled that it explained the reboot’s title, Leverage: Redemption. Although not mentioned by its Hebrew name, teshuvah forms the whole basis for the new season. Teshuvah is the concept of repentance or atonement for the sins one has committed. Stemming from the root shuv/shuva, it carries the literal sense of “return.” In a spiritual context, this usually means a return to G-d, of finding one’s way back to holiness and by extension good favor in the eyes of the Divine. But equally important is restoring one’s relationships with fellow humans by repairing any hurt one has caused over the past year. This is of special significance in the holy month of Elul, leading into Rosh haShanah, the Yamim Noraim, and Yom Kippur, but one can undertake a journey of redemption at any point in time. That teshuvah is a journey is a vital message for Harry to hear; one job, one reparative act isn’t enough to overturn years of being on the wrong side of justice, to his chagrin. As the season progresses, we get to watch his path of teshuvah unfold, with all its frustrations and consequences. Harry grows into his role as a fixer, not only someone who can find jobs and marks for the team, but fixes what he has broken or harmed.

So why was Hardison the one to make this speech?

I do maintain that it does provide a stronger textual basis for reading Hardison as Jewish by implication (though the brief on-screen explanation for why he knows about teshuvah, that his foster-parent Nana raised a multi-faith household, is important in its own merit, and meshes well with his character traits of empathy and understanding for diverse experiences). However, beyond this, Hardison isn’t exactly an archetypical model for teshuvah. In the original series, he was the youngest character of the main ensemble, a hacking prodigy in the start of his adult career, with few mistakes or slights against others under his belt. In one flashback we see that his possibly first crime was stealing from the Bank of Iceland to pay off his Nana’s medical bills, and that his other early hacking exploits were in the service of fulfilling personal desires, with only those who could afford to pay the bill as targets. Indeed, in the middle of his speech, Hardison points to Eliot, the character with the most violent and gritty past who views his work with the Leverage team as atonement, for a prime example of ongoing teshuvah. So while no one is perfect and everyone has a reason for doing teshuvah, this question of why Hardison is the one to give this series-defining speech inspired me to look at his character choices and behavior, and see how they resonate with a different but interrelated Jewish principle, that of tikkun olam. 

Tikkun olam is literally translated as “repairing the world,” and can take many different forms, such as protecting the rights of vulnerable people in society, or giving tzedakah (5). In modern times, tikkun olam is often the rallying cry for Jewish social activists, particularly among environmentalists for whom literally restoring the health of the natural world is the key goal. Teshuvah and tikkun olam are intertwined (the former is the latter performed at an interpersonal level) and both hold a sense of fixing or repairing, but tikkun olam really revolves around a person feeling called to address an injustice that they may have not had a personal hand in creating. Hardison’s sense of a universal scale of justice which he has the power to help right on a global level and his newfound drive to do humanitarian work, picked up sometime after the end of the original series, make tikkun olam a central value for his character. This is why we get this nice bit of dialogue from Eliot to Hardison in the second episode of the reboot, when the latter’s outside efforts to organize international aid start distracting him from his work with the team: “Is [humanitarian work] a side gig? In our line of work, you’re one of the best. But in that line of work… you’re the only one, man.” The character who most exemplifies teshuvah reminds Hardison of his amazing ability to effect change for the better on a huge stage, to do some effective tikkun olam. It’s this acknowledgement of where Hardison can do the most good that prompts the character’s absence for the remainder of the episodes released thus far, turning his side gig into his main gig.

With this in mind, it will be interesting to see where Hardison’s arc for this season goes. Separated from the rest of the team, the hacker still has remarkable power to change the world, because it is, after all, the “age of the geek.” However, he is still one person. For all that both teshuvah and tikkun olam are individual responsibilities and require individual decision-making and effort, the latter especially relies on collective work to actually make things happen. Hardison leaving is better than trying to do humanitarian work and Leverage at the same time, but there’s only so long he can be the “only one” in the field before burning out. I’m reminded of one of the most famous (for good reason) maxims in Judaism:

It is not your duty to finish the work, but neither are you free to neglect it. (6)

Elul is traditionally a time for introspection and heeding the calls to repentance. After a year where it’s never been easier to feel powerless and drained by everything going on around us, I think it’s worth taking the time to examine what kind of work we are capable of in our own lives. Maybe it’s fixing the very recent and tangible hurts we’ve left behind, like Harry. Maybe it’s the little changes for the better that we make every day, motivated by our sense of responsibility, like Eliot. And maybe it’s the grueling challenge of major social change, like Hardison. And if any of this work gets too much, who can we fall back on for support and healing? Determining what needs repair, working on our own scale and where our efforts are most helpful, and thereby contributing to justice in realistic ways means that we can start the new year fresh, having contemplated in holiday fashion how we can be better agents in the world.

Shana tovah u’metukah and ketivah tovah to all (7), and may the work we do in the coming year be for good!

------

(1) Disclaimer: everybody’s fandom experiences are different, and this is just what I’ve picked up on in my short time watching and enjoying this show with others.

(2) See, for example, the introduction and first chapter of Boyarin’s book Unheroic Conduct: The Rise of Heterosexuality and the Invention of the Jewish Man (I especially recommend at least this portion if you are interested in queer theory and Judaic studies). There he explores the development of Jewish masculinity in direct opposition to Christian masculine standards.

(3) I might even go so far as to place Hardison well within the Jewish masculine ideal of Edelkayt, gentle and studious nobility (although I would hesitate to call him timid, another trait associated with Edelkayt). Boyarin explains that this scholarly, non-athletic model of man did not carry negative associations in the historical Jewish mindset, but was rather the height of attractiveness (Boyarin, 2, 51).

(4) Jews of color make up 20% of American Jews, according to statistics from Be’chol Lashon, and this number is projected to increase as American demographics continue to change: https://globaljews.org/about/mission/. 

(5) Tzedakah is commonly known as righteous charity. According to traditional authority Maimonides, it should be given anonymously and without embarrassment to the person in need, generous, and designed to help the recipient become self-sufficient.

(6) Rabbi Tarfon, Pirkei Avot, 2:16

(7) “A good and sweet year” and “a good inscription [in the Book of Life]”

[kdramaxoxo]

please recommendation film or drama have healing & comforting

Healing is my absolute favorite K-drama theme.

K-dramas with Healing & Comfort:

Psycho But It’s Okay: A gorgeous k-drama featuring two brothers who lost their mother, and a beautiful & famous author who grew up in a traumatic and abusive household. Everyone is very closed off and holding onto intense pain, but the three come together to help one another move on and find happiness. There’s also a really pretty narrative theme featuring fairytales.

Come and Hug Me: This thriller is not for the faint of heart but the main theme is healing. Two friends are torn apart when the boy’s dad kills the girls entire family. Later in life, they find one another and walk on the path to healing while still being tormented by their past. It also focuses on the trauma and manipulation the killer has on the whole family, making the show beautiful, terrifying and heartbreaking at the same time. 

Thirty But Seventeen: Precious puppies with past trauma! Don’t be turned off by the shows description as it turned out to be one of the best surprises of 2018 for me. The leads are lovely and everyone relies and supports one another - it’s so sweet.

A Piece Of Your Mind: This kdrama really captured my heart (even if the premise is a not for everyone). Using an AI software to capture the personality of someone, a group of people are pushed together by a person they care about who is no longer alive. It’s an unusual premise, but the AI takes a back seat to the romance, friendship and healing that so many of them need. Almost everyone in this show needs comfort and healing.

Just Between Lovers: This show is heavy on the melodrama and centers around a group of people who have dealt with a past trauma, killing members of their families. The lead couple made me fall in love with both of the actors, quickly making Lee Junho my bias wrecker. It also made me realize how much I love angst! It features real people (not rich heirs) which is a plus for me. If I can watch a love story that’s about healing from trauma through love and support…I’m in!

Your House Helper: This one is a lovely drama, and I really enjoyed the female focused and supportive friendships. It’s about a girl who’s father dies and is trying to put her life back together. To pay the bills her friends move in and they hire a ‘house helper’ to get themselves organized. It’s a quieter pace that I quite liked and I wish more people had given it a chance.

Be Melodramatic / Melo Is My Nature: This drama is by far my favorite slice-of-life drama of 2019. Found family, strong and complex characters, I laughed, I cried. It isn’t all about healing because it features separate plot lines, but there is one that is all about getting over a loss and another about forgiveness and comfort.

When the Weather Is Fine: A girl returns to her small and quiet hometown to live with her estranged aunt. She is reacquainted with a class mate and gets a job at his book store. The highlights of this drama are the soft romance scenes, and the side characters. It’s a bit frustrating in the family/relationship department but the two leads are caring heavy emotional weights and traumatic backstories and lean on one another for support.

Mystic Pop Up Bar: A fantasy drama featuring three souls who are tied together because of a painful past. They help people in pain settle grudges and and heal from regret so there are mini healing stories built in. 

The Smile Has Left Your Eyes: This is a seriously creepy and unusual k-drama with mystery elements. I LOVED it but it’s not light and fluffy. There is some healing but mostly comfort between the two leads. 

Reunited Worlds: Hae Sung, a senior in high school dies and through k-drama magic, travels twelve years into the future to solve the mystery of his death. He reunites with his high school sweetheart (a now 31 year old woman) and the two fall back in love. His return brings his family and friends back together so they can all heal.

It’s Okay That’s Love: One of my favorite dramas, the main topic is mental illness and for once, the K-drama writers did it justice (mostly)! With trauma and mental illness comes sadness, but there’s a great mix of light-heartedness that makes this heartwarming story pretty amazing.

[styleiconoscarthegrouch]

I was debating writing this at all, given the current state of fandom, but fuck it, I’ve watched on and off since season 4 and so long as Noel is there I’ll be watching. So if they get a season 11 (which I feel like they will at this point) here is my list of demands:

1. Ian and Mickey need gay friends. I have felt this way since I started watching back in season 4, but one of my all time favorite IxM scenes is the loft scene after their first public kiss in the club. I think that whole night is pivitol for Mickey as a character because I think it’s the first time in his life where he has seen other gay men, not just living, but thriving. Openly and unashamedly. Mickey is clearly having a bit of culture shock throughout that scene, and I don’t know that that particular brand of gay is his community but he deserves to find the part of the gay community that is.

Ian also needs to go back to having gay friends. I wish that is what they had done with the Trevor storyline but what’s done is done.

I think one of the major issues in their relationship (that is going to continue into their marriage) is their co-dependence. Mickey especially doesn’t have anyone other than Ian who really cares about him, and the Gallagher siblings are increasingly fractured that Ian is also more isolated then ever. They both desperately need friends. Ideally friends who are also gay because gay friends just get it, in a way straight people never will.

2. I need to know who the fuck is responsible for Liam rn. I know Frank didn’t lose his parental rights when Fiona became his legal guardian but like...he can’t be the one in charge of Liam. Granted I haven’t watched season 9 so maybe this question was answered there but as of right now it seems like no one gives a shit about him and that sucks! And the writers kind of circled that idea with the Mavar sl but it ended so quickly that it doesn’t count. This leads me to...

3. Let Ian be the new Fiona. This straight up will not happen. But it should!

At this point it’s clear that Debbie doesn’t have the empathy to be the center of the family. She is just too selfish and immature to anchor the show around, and keep the other characters engaged in her sl. Lip could conceivably do it (and I think there is a small chance the writers wise up and go in this direction) fatherhood has been good for Lip, he seems more grounded and sympathetic this season than he has since at least season four. But after 10.06 it seems like they’re trying to further separate him from his siblings and have him build a family with Tami.

So the logical choice would be to put Ian in charge. He’s always been fairly responsible, and generally gotten along with all of his siblings. The implication at the very beginning of season 5 was that he, Mickey and Svetlana were pretty successfully living together and running a household. If the show wanted to try and get back to it’s roots at all they could do that with Ian. You get some minor drama out of Ian and Mickey navigating being newly weds who have to live with Gallaghers. But you let their relationship be the heart of the show, and build the seasons major multi character plots off of and connected to the two of them.

Like I said this one will not happen! But it’s nice to dream sometimes.

4. Mickey needs a hobby. Idk what it is. He just needs something that he can do to relax. I’d love it if they brought back his guitar but it really can be anything. He just deserves joy in his life and one way the writers can show that to me is by giving him a hobby.

That’s it for now, lmk if you want to know how I think the writers could should or will play out any of these plot threads! I have so many more thoughts!

[taffeesims]

8 Mods For A Better/More Fun Gaming Experience

These are in my opinion the top ten mods that you need in your game, for a better game play experience. There are 2 18+ mods that will be included at the end. (All these mods are base game compatible)

First up we have MC Command Center. If you don’t have this is in your game... well better get downloading. It is a must have for just a better all around experience. Plus if your trying to have up to 25 people in the same household. Then this is for you! MC Command Center

Next we’ve got slice of life. For the most realistic game play you need this mod. You can throw teen parties, be a popular teen, have drama, plus so much more. Plus custom personalities and traits. Slice of Life

Another mod from the amazing creator Kawaii Stacie is the playable npc jobs mod. Yes you heard me right. Playable. NPC. Jobs. You can be a Dj, maid, nanny, and market vendor. Playable NPC Jobs

Next... you guessed it! Another Kawaii Stacie mod. We have the explore mod. What’s it about you ask. Well this mod lets your sim(s) leave and go down the rabbit hole. They will return with buffs, skill increases, relationship increases, etc. My favorite is when paired with slice of life, have the whole family leave except your teen, and throw a house party! Explore

For mods 5 and 6 I’m combining 2 Kawaii Stacie Mod’s together (download separately). We have the Education Bundle, which lets your toddler go to preschool, but the twist is that you can follow your kid/teen to school (There’s also zoom school). All you have to do is start the event before 8. And we have the after school activities where you can join a club with your kid/teen. Education System After School Activities

Now for really the 7th mod we have our first of the 18+ bundle. We have basemental drugs. Where your sim can actually be a drug dealer. You can grow weed and shrooms, write/read trip reports, sell a bundle of different types of drugs, but remember to not get caught or you could risk jail. This mod works better when combined with Wicked Whims which is next. Basemental Drugs

For our last and final we have Wicked Whims. I won’t go too far into explanation for the sake of people younger than 18 reading this. But you can read everything about wicked whims (if you have’t heard already) here. Wicked Whims

[sushigal007]

The Friends Household

Over to Max Flexor and Mitch Indie! They share a lot, but separate houses, five feet apart ‘cause they’re not gay. Maybe.

Max: I will not give anybody a pearl necklace.

Mitch: Nothing.

Mitch: Soooo... are you gonna just stand there? Townie: Yes.

Max: Please, don’t go. She’s right behind me. Cheerleader: Fada soola gor!

Mitch: Ripp Grunt.

Max: :(

I was originally gonna lock their bedroom doors to give them some personal space, but then Humble dropped off the computer and I didn’t think it was fair to let just one of them have access to it, but that’s a decision Max is about to regret.

Right, watching the boys dick around in their tiny houses is getting boring and Mitch needs a creativity point, so I sent him to the music hall in the hope he’d roll a skill want. Mitch: Nope. But I do wanna jump on the sofas. Done. Now, about the skilling? Mitch: Lol nope.

Mitch: I do wanna play the drums though! ...OK, carry on! Mitch: And then I wanna prank somebody.

Marissa: Ventrillofart? Seriously? Mitch: It was just a joke!

Marissa: DO I LOOK LIKE A JOKE TO YOU?

Ah, domestic bliss.

Mitch and Max: No homo. Mitch and Max: *footsie under the table*

NO.

Max is gonna have so many cleaning points by the time he graduates. He’s not interested in skilling or doing any college work, so I assume he intends to mop his way to graduation.

Hows your stolen library book? Max: It’s about orphans and I wanna adopt them and save them from Count Olaf.

Spent ages trying to find out Mitch’s OTH and then realised they had zero paintings for me to see if it was art. And it’s art! Not that he cares, he’s not interested in buying an easel or any more paintings, so he’s going to be staring at this picture FOREVER. Mitch: It’s a dog! So I’m fine with that.

Max: Crop duster, coming through! Mitch: Haha, farts are funny!

You just gonna sit there? Mitch: Yup. You could read the book? Mitch: Nah, Max already spoiled the ending for me.

A single painting, even one of a dog, does not build a whole lot of art enthusiasm, so I sent Max out to the coffee shop to look at art.

Mitch: HAW HAW HAW THERE’S A WHOLE BUNCH OF DUDES WITH THEIR DICKS OUT! Ah, a Greek vase then.

HOW? Mitch: I dunno, I went to class?

College.

I’m ashamed to admit that I played two whole households through two semesters and sent everybody to the student center on multiple occasions and only now realised this espresso stand didn’t have a barista.

Mitch: Guess it’s gonna be booze then.

And now, the real reason I dragged him out to the student center - karaoke!

Mitch: This is doing nothing for me.

Mitch: And here’s the link to my Twitter. Follow me! Angela: Haha! No.

Mitch: I burned my dinner. :(

Both the boys need creativity points and refuse to roll any wants for it, so it’s back out to King’s Music Hall to try and trick them into autonomously skilling.

And they both performed admirably!

Townie: BOO YOU SUCK, GET OFF THE STAGE! Do not get off the stage!

Oh, Mitch is doing a Drama course and so I decided to invite over his professor because I’ve heard they’re in love with everybody, but when she chatted to Max, she just fell out of BFF with him and nothing else, so that was anticlimatic.

Oh well, it’s finals time!

Max: Omg omg gross gross gross.

Speaking of gross.

Mitch: Look over there! Monica: What- *water balloon to the back of the head*

Monica: HOW VERY DARE YOU. Poor Mitch, nobody ever appreciates his pranks. Possibly because all his pranks suck.

Anyway, he needs a body point, so I decided if he liked water that much, he could go swimming.

Back home, Max chats to Meadow Annie. (One day I will give the Pleasantview townies their real names back). Not!Meadow: ALIENS.

Streaker: You like space stuff? Check out this moon! Annie: OH GOD MY PURE VIRGIN EYES!

Streaker: Oh shit oh shit I just flashed a teenager.

Mitch invited over Delilah. Mitch: Kiss kiss darling.

And then I guess nothing interesting happened because the next shot was the coach. Usually he annoys me, but today I’m glad to see him because Mitch never finished getting that body point.

Mitch: Do I have to keep doing this now he’s gone? Do you still need a body point? Yes? Then keep stretching.

Alas, he didn’t manage to get it before finals.

Mitch rolled a want for a game, so of course I immediately jumped at the chance to get the one that skills.

Hobby Leader: Don’t look at me.

Max: Hi! Why don’t you come in! Random: I’d love to! Max: And while you’re here, inside a house, pretending to be a playable, you could see what it’s like to clean toilets.

Random: I am having second thoughts.

The nice thing about Mitch is that even though he never rolls any skilling or academic wants, his Pleasure secondary means he’s always happy to sing or play drums when I need him to.

Mitch: HA HA HA WHAT A BUNCH OF CRAPPY SIGNS!

He’s not so much into chess though. Mitch: Just gonna sit here and daydream. That’s fine, you have a chessboard at home.

Mitch: Ooh! I got fat!

Mitch: Well, it’s not like I can get any fatter.

Hobby Leader: Seriously, don’t look at me. Max: Believe me, I’m not.

Max: Chess? Mitch: Eh, I guess so.

You have a shower! You have two showers!

YOU HAVE A SHOWER RIGHT BEHIND YOU!!!

I got the barista to spawn! Turns out the problem was the counters I used to hide the ugly. I think I need to put them on walk-through blocks.

I sent both boys to the gym, hit pause and then suffered several minutes of panic when it wouldn’t unpause. I was this close to quitting without saving, when I hit Build Mode during all my button mashing, and the stupid broken Wants controller message that plagues me popped up. I guess I must have hit pause just when the broken Sim walked onto the lot and confused the whole game.

Anyway, this comment was more a message to remind me what fixed it in case it happens again and other than that, nothing happened.

Cheerleader: Can your head do this!? Max: Um, no, and I’m pretty sure yours shouldn’t either.

Cheerleader: Woo, TV!

And both boys scrape through another semester.

UBERHOOD INDEX

[daughterofelros]

You guys, I have this friend that I’m so proud of.

We went to elementary school together, we stayed friends all through the “girls shouldn’t be friends with boys” peer pressure. I remember amazing days with this group of guy friends and I clambering over rock walls in rain-drenched spring forests and taking over the elementary school playground to have elaborate sci-fi/fantasy flavored adventures, weaving in and out of the kids who wanted to to traditional things on the slide, like I don’t know...slide? Instead of battle dragons and rescue the part of our group trapped in the highest tower.

We’ve kept in touch throughout the years, chat whenever we run into each other when visiting our home town. He was in NYC for awhile, now he’s out in LA, and he’s having such an amazing glow up. He’s working in a lot of web-based shows, some podcasts, great stuff. He donates his time off to volunteer with kids, and he’s an amazing teller of stories. It’s been a little surreal honestly.

Sometimes I’ll walk into the Center (I run a college and career center in two really amazing urban high schools) and I’ll see my kids watching his videos. My partners will bring me links to great things he’s doing like they’re magpies with shiny metal going “this is your friend, right? This is so cool!”

I tend to send him messages whenever cool stuff like that happens, because I feel like on every platform, negativity floats to the top and I don’t think he’s on most platforms in a way that the crap can bombard him. I assume it exists, I steer clear of mentions of it myself, because it doesn’t do good things to my brain to see my friends attacked by trolls who hate anything that leans toward social justice.

He’s the sweetest— he recorded a video for me that I can play for my kids if they’re trying to cut class and hang out in my center. I use it long before security does a sweep and the kids who are resistant to following school policies would get in trouble. I sit down with them, and remind them that if I have to tell them a third time to go to class, I get to play the video. They say fine, end up laughing at the video, and heading back to class, feeling seen because a semi-famous comedy person talked to them in a video where he addresses me by name, and that’s way better than a security guard challenging them.

And I’m just so, so happy that, since I’ve gotten back on tumblr, I keep seeing posts where people talk about how much it means to them to see positive representation of the LGBTQIA+ community in the content he creates, how wonderful his comedy is. I’m so glad that the work he does with his life is having positive impacts for people, and you better believe I send him updates on every set of positive comments, because in 2020 I am fiercely committed to sharing things that I like, not just things that activate negative thoughts and prompt us to share those pieces of content disproportionately.

(I do not share the RPF Fic that I have stumbled across. Right now, he’s still a degree of separation removed from any RPF fandom I’ve read or written in, so we’re good there. My brain knows not to poke it. And honestly, I’m well-trained to not get weirded out my RPF of people I know in passing, so this is just one extra level of closeness.

Because seriously. I grew up in a weird, tiny town where I’d bump into famous actors on the street, and they’d tease me about my life choices. I held an Oscar when I was seven, because my father, who owned the town deli and knew everyone’s coffee and breakfast sandwich order, asked the winner of said Oscar if he could borrow it so my Mom could give a presentation to her grad school class about the modeling software they had used to predict the Oscar winners that year. Guys would talk about being in production meetings for The Godfather and people thinking the idea was crap. A famous actor’s tax return was misdelivered to my grandmother, so she drove it over to him the next day and he thanked her with tickets to his broadway show.

Famous sommeliers and four-star restauranteurs and producers live in town and like to give asshole tourists shitty country directions that take them on a nine mile loop past the tree with the owl on the Saunders farm if the tourists are being shitty to locals (all to get to a destination 1/4 mile away around the next curve in the road). Brad Pitt yelled at my parents for selling the story that he was in town for a few days, and my father calmly pointed out that the nice guy Brad had been chatting with over breakfast the day before was in fact the editor of the paper from the city across the river. Brad had disclosed his location himself.

One of the actors who came in to help stage student-written productions for the drama club in high school is an Oscar-winner now. It was weird to see her in a red carpet gown because I’ve never seen her wear anything other than baggy black sweatpants.

My Mom ran into Daniel Craig in the supermarket a few months back. She gave him advice on canned soup. She had no idea that the pleasant lady with him was Rachel Weisz. She likes movies Rachel Weisz is in, and it still didn’t register to her. She did make note the one time Katherine Hepburn came into the deli though.

My grandpa smoked weed with Willie Nelson when he came through town and stopped at one of the only other restaurants there- only celebrity he ever bothered getting out of bed for. I have a ceramic rabbit collection that belonged to my Uncle Gene and Uncle Bob. Uncle Bob wrote the book that the Chucky movies are based on. I have a collection of small rabbit figurines from the household of the man who created Chucky.

Another famous actor made me a coat rack when I was born, because he was in a wood-working phase. It’s mint green, there are cows on it, and the pegs kept falling out.

Another guys from the group of friends would routinely come home to find Steve Buscemi in his living room. His Mom was Steve’s preferred seamstress when he needed something altered.

It’s a weird life. And still, I’m the most proud of my friend. )

[dailyaudiobible]

01/15/2020 DAB Transcript

Genesis 31:17-32:12, Matthew 10:24-11:6, Psalms 13:1-6, Proverbs 3:16-18

Today is the 15th day of January, welcome to the Daily Audio Bible, I’m Brian it's great to be here with you. And I suppose at some point halfway through today we…we cross the center of month number one, halfway through the first month of a new year and decade. So, well done…well done. And let's just take a moment here to reflect on the first two weeks of the Bible. Like the Bible has been speaking to us. It is an amazing voyage that we have embarked on together. And, so, let's continue that journey. Today…well…this week we’re reading from the Christian Standard Bible. And today Genesis chapter 31 verse 17 to 32 verse 12. And we continue to read of the great drama of the patriarch Jacob.

Commentary:

Alright. Let’s look at what Jesus is talking about in the book of Matthew today. He's still commissioning, He’s still instructing His followers as they’re being sent out and He’s basically telling them, “this is what you can expect.” So, “a disciple isn't above the teacher. A slave isn’t above the master. It’s enough for a disciple to become like his Teacher, which is why we aspire to become Christlike in our faith. But that’s not Jesus point. Jesus point is, “don't expect to be treated differently then you're watching me be treated. If you want to become like your Master, then you should see the things that your Master goes through. This is what you ‘e gonna go through.” And, so, He says, “if they call the head of the house Beelzebul, how much more the members of his household?” This word, Beelzebul or Beelzebub. We’ve probably heard it before. We’ve probably heard it Beelzebub like referring to the devil. Although this wouldn't have been a name, I suspect that the evil one would've chosen for itself. So, Beelzebul, means Baal the Prince. And we’re just a couple weeks into the Bible but we’re gonna see Baal worship a lot. So, Beelzebub is probably a distortion of this, and it means the Lord of the flies. More…more specifically like Lord of…of the…the manure pile. Alright. And, so, the subjects would be the flies. So, Jesus is saying like, “you’re becoming a part of this divine family, this household and I am the head of the house and if they’re gonna call me that how much more are they gonna call you that.” And this is another opportunity for us to pause right at the beginning of this journey because it clicks so many things into place about our own personal faith journey because we believe that when we…when we come into a relationship with Jesus and begin to follow that path then we become children of God and so blessing becomes apparent all around us and this is what we have to look forward to. And, so, it becomes really confusing then when we have to face supreme struggles in life. And what we have to become aware of is that Jesus, God made flesh dwelling among us as a human being faced and predicted of the struggles of life that we’re going to face. This idea that the opposition will come our way and that it that…that it must be endured and that we must press into and press through these things. This isn't hidden in the Bible, it’s like blinking all over the place, and ultimately where going to find out how necessary challenge is to our growth. But nevertheless, Jesus is preparing His first friends to go into the world, and this is what He's telling them to expect. So, after we talk about the Lord of flies He says, “don't be afraid of them. There’s nothing covered that won't be uncovered and nothing hidden that won’t be made known. What I tell you in the dark, speak in the light. What you hear in a whisper, proclaim to the house tops. Don't fear those who can kill the body but aren’t able to kill the soul. Fear the one who can do both. Aren’t two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not even one of them falls to the ground without the Father's consent. And even the hairs of the head…the hairs of your head have been counted. So, don't be afraid. You're worth more than many sparrows.” So, what are Jesus fundamental instructions here. He’s telling His friends, “people are gonna say some pretty bad things about you. They’re gonna make all kinds of weird and awful references about you because they're doing that to me and you are a part of me. So, this is what you can expect. They’re gonna…they’re gonna say all kinds of stuff about you, but don't worry. Nothing that’s covered is gonna stay uncovered and there's nothing that's hidden that won't be made known.” In other words, keep going, keep being true, keep announcing the kingdom. In the end what's in the dark will be drug out into the light. Keep enduring, keep moving forward, keep going. “Those that acknowledge me before others, I will acknowledge before the Father in heaven and those who deny I’ll deny before the Father in heaven.” Okay and then this is where it gets really, really challenging. I’m quoting Jesus. “Don't assume that I came to bring peace on the earth. I did not come to bring peace but a sword. For I came to turn a man against his father, a daughter against her mother, a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law. A man's enemies will be the members of his household.” And that’s Jesus quoting from the prophet Micah when He goes on. “The one who loves a father or mother more than me is not worthy of me. The one who loves a son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. And whoever doesn't take up his cross and follow me is not worthy of me. Anyone who finds his life will lose it, and anyone who loses his life because of me will find it.” If those words are disruptive to you, like if…if they kind of shake you a bit and you’re like, “okay. How…how would I…how do I even think about doing that successfully? Then good. Then Jesus has spoken words that have gotten your attention. And you can imagine that if you were standing in a crowd around Jesus as these things were being spoken that they would have your attention. But how do we do this? Like, how do we love father or mother less and love him more so that we’re worthy or how do we love son or daughter less so…so that we’re worthy? Is that even quantifiable, right? Like, could you ever think to yourself, “okay. I love my daughter with all of my heart but a little less than I love Jesus and I see that on my love gauge meter.” What's underneath all this? What is Jesus getting at? Why is He saying disruptive things to get our attention? What are we supposed to know here? Basically lets just remember our journey and its beginning, like on day two, when we were crossing through Genesis chapter 3 and the tree of the knowledge of good and evil and the rebellion and the eyes of Adam and Eve being opened and their shame and their awareness of their nakedness. The way that we describe this in the Christian faith is often like a canyon or a chasm, a separation from God. Like, that’s very, very common imagery. Let’s go into that for a second. If you are separate from something, then you are aware that you are other than that thing, right? But that separation was never intended to be the way we viewed reality. And awareness of our separateness from God was not our created state. So, anyone who's ever gone through a situation where the reality that you thought you understood was not the whole picture, like there was a whole lot more and it's overwhelming. Like, that can be devastating. For example, if you're a married person, you find out your spouse has been unfaithful, that is a complete shift in consciousness and awareness, and a complete reframing of the reality that you thought you knew. And when something like that happens, the union that you thought you had is blown apart, and you couldn't feel more separate than you do. We could say you become acutely aware of the separation between you. When these sorts of things happen, what do you hear? We've decided to separate. So, you can imagine Adam and Eve becoming aware for the first time of these categories, that they even exist. And we see from the Scriptures, they’re…they’re eyes are opened, and they feel ashamed and they feel naked and they hide and then…then they’re covered and then they’re covering themselves from then on. When our natural state is naked and unashamed and unafraid, like a child. After this, a reality that wasn't the intended one was made manifest, became their reality and required them to create an identity that was shaped around themselves because this is all they need to do. And at some point, along the line we began to call this our “self”. It's the thing. It's the construct of that we have that tells us we are separate from somebody else and we have our own way of looking at things. Okay, let's go back into our story here. Jesus is saying all of these things. Like why is He telling His friends, “they’re calling me Lord of the flies, Lord of the manure pile. They're gonna call you that too.” Like why would anybody call pure light and love and graciousness, why would anybody call a true, fully, whole human being like Jesus anything like that? Truth and true humanity came into the world and were modeled and humanity had fallen so far from God that it could not not only recognize God, but rather confuse God with Beelzebub and eventually plot and succeed to assassinate God. The religious leaders who were doing the work of stewarding the souls of the people in their relations to God could not see beyond themselves in order to acknowledge God. To maybe put it more in the vernacular of the Bible, “the light came into the darkness and the darkness comprehended it not. Couldn't understand, couldn't become aware.” So, this “self”, and we all have one of those, right, this awareness of our separateness, this “self” and all these things that we attach it to in order to have an identity can actually serve to reinforce our separation from God. The very thing that this Jesus that we are learning and reading about came to bridge; however, in crossing that bridge…and again this is Christianity 101…in crossing that bridge we have to leave something behind, ourselves. We’re instructed in the Scriptures to die to ourselves and become alive unto God and in the process become awakened and aware of who we really are in Christ, which we will explore very deeply as we move through the New Testament. So, fundamentally what Jesus is saying is that anything you are holding onto, any attachment that you have in your life, whether that's to a person or to a place or to a thing, if you are more attached to that, if you're looking for that to be your source of life then you aren’t worthy of me. This…this isn't something new. This is the whole Bible. We’re just gonna repeatedly watch different people over different periods of time try to create a world that they can control and live in only to find it destroys them because we do not live in a godless world and this world will not work without Him. And the only way forward is into full and utter surrender. And when that comes into our lives, when we think about Jesus and surrendering to Him, we might be able to get our minds around surrendering to God but then when we look at our lives functionally, we realize we’re not doing a whole lot of surrendering or sacrificing. And people don't like to be told to do. People don't like to submit and surrender. People don't want the truth enough to search for it with all of their hearts no matter what it might bring them to. The truth will and does set us free, but not before it confronts what is false. And we as people are notoriously not good at accepting that. So, that brings Jesus words, “don't assume that I came to bring peace on the earth. I didn't come to bring peace but a sword.” What we’re talking about here is the truth, the truth of how things are. And the more we listen to Jesus and His teachings and explore this, the more we will see how distant from that reality the world is. And it's easy for us to think like, “why can’t everybody just get on the same page? Why can't we just figure out hunger? Why can't we just figure out peace? Like, we’re people. We’re in this together. Why can't we figure this out?” That's kind of what God has been saying all along and that's kind of what he says throughout all of the Bible. “You guys. Return to me. The whole story can change.” One kingdom does not replace another kingdom without conflict and disruption though, and that happens in our own hearts. In fact, it happens here first. And so, let's embrace it.

Prayer:

Jesus, we…it's hard to consider the disruption even when we know you are in it. It's hard to consider it good until later…you…because it's unpleasant, it…it shakes what we think we know, it…it causes us to…to feel out of sorts. And all you're doing is exposing our need for control and all of the false constructs of our lives. And, so, we’re here and we trust you. You are God and we trust you. And, so, we invite your Holy Spirit to lead us into all truth. And this is a common thing that we pray for. We..we need it desperately, we need it daily, we need it hourly, we need it every minute. So, come Holy Spirit we pray. Lead us into all truth we ask in the name of Jesus. Amen.

Announcements:

dailyaudiobible.com is the website, its home base, its where you find out what's going on around here. So, be sure to stay tuned and stay connected in any way that you want to.

The Daily Audio Bible Shop is available with resources for the journey that we are on, all kinds of different resources, from things to write to things to read and listen to. So, check that out.

One thing I have not mentioned at all, yet this year is our…our long-running relationship with coffee and tea. It might sound odd. It’s just kind of grown up in the community. I personally am a bit of a…a coffee snob and over the last couple of years have grown very fond of tea as well, but a bit of a coffee snob and that's kind of where it all began. I was just looking for the best coffee, the best things to drink coffee with, all of this. I guess it's been over a decade now since we formed our own brand of coffee and it’s called Windfarm. And that name, Windfarm, it's on other things that we do as well. It…it's just a little nod to the book of Ezekiel chapter 37. There is a story, it's famous and there's a valley of dry bones and God asks the prophet, “can these bones live again?” And the prophets like, “how? Only You would know that.” And God tells Ezekiel to call to the four winds, the breath of life and resurrection happens. And, so, Windfarm, just this ongoing, never ceasing calling the breath of life into the community into the world is…is kinda wear that name comes from. But anyway, we’ve been roasting our own coffee and importing our own raw green and…and tea…we’ve been doing this for a long time, partly because it was the rhythm of…of my life. Then I realized. you know what, morning coffee is a tradition around the world. Morning tea or coffee, that’s something that everybody, everybody does. What if what…if we could create a better product? What if we could...what if we could just be boutique-y and it's really fresh and we send it out really fresh and all of the resources because this is like something that we’re gonna buy anyway, we’re gonna go through the drive-through and get a cup of coffee. We’re gonna do…we’re gonna do all this anyway. What if we could just channel that into…into what we’re doing here. And, so, that's where coffee and tea were born, and you can find them in the Daily Audio Bible Shop. You can see all the different varieties that we have. You can have it sent to you every month, however many bags you want or drink or consume. And they can be shipped to you fresh every month. And man…when that little box arrives and that containers cut open, the fresh coffee comes flooding out and it's just wonderful. So, we have that - coffee, tea. Coffee can be sent to you every month. We also found last year, so it's a relatively new product, a way to steep coffee like tea. It might sound odd, but I had to try it for myself. Last year when I went to Israel, I had a bunch of these pouches to try to see to see if it was gonna be a decent cup of coffee because I travel a lot. And, so, end…end up drinking a lot of bad coffee. And this was good. So, got back from Israel and went about the business of…of creating Windfarm steeped coffee. And, so, that is great. Its Nitro sealed. So, it just…the thing about coffee is…it…it will go stale like food. Like it…it does get worse with time. And normally we’re drinking really old coffee and so you’re drinking bad coffee. But this nitrogen pushes the oxygen out and it keeps it in this state of freshness for months and months. And, so, the steeped version of Windfarm coffee, for those of you who travel or want to keep some at the office or whatever, those are available as well in the Daily Audio Bible shop.

If you want to partner with the Daily Audio Bible you can do that dailyaudiobible.com as well. There's a link on the homepage and I thank you profoundly for your partnership. If you’re using the Daily Audio Bible app, you can press the Give button in the upper right-hand corner or, if you prefer, the mailing address is PO Box 1996 Spring Hill Tennessee 37174.

And, as always, if you have a prayer request or comment, you can hit the Hotline button, the little red button in the app and begin to share or you can dial 877-942-4253.

And that's it for today. I’m Brian I love you and I will be waiting for you here tomorrow.

Community Prayer and Praise:

Hello Daily Audio Bible my name is Harold and I am in St. Louis and I am not a believer. I actually was looking for a podcast because I am training right now, I started training for the Chicago Marathon and I’ve been looking for something because last year training, listening to like Seth Rogan and some of those other podcasts just started to weave me down and I figured it was a new year and I’ve been listening since January 1st. And I have to say I appreciate everything that you guys are doing here with the podcast. It’s not like when you go to church, I guess where people are trying to force you something. I appreciate that you’re reading to us and that you explain it afterwards and I’m hoping that with every run I got on it will maybe bring me closer to finding the truth that I guess everybody here knows. So, I guess, pray for this Audio Bible because it’s making a difference in my life right now. Since listening I’ve been happier and more at peace and I just want to say thank you. Thank you for everything you’ve done, everything you do and thank you.

Hello DAB family hope everyone is doing well. My name is Okezee I’m reaching out to family to offer prayers for my mother. My mother had a stroke on December 31. And, so, we kind of brought in the new year on not the most excited note. She’s currently in the hospital. It’s a pretty severe stroke but I know, and I trust that God can, and He will heal her if it is in His will. So, I’m reaching out to you family to lift my mother up in prayer. Her name is Mary. She is a woman of faith. You can see that she’s fighting to hang in there. And at this point I just…I turn it over to God but I know that I have a family of prayer warriors out there and I’m… I’m calling on you to raise her up, to bring her before the Lord and just asking for complete healing and restoration and above all that His will might be done. Thank you, family. I love you guys. I need you guys. Be well.

Good morning friends this is Jenn in SoCal a.k.a. Prayer Warrior Princess. Today is Wednesday, January 5th. I turned on the DAB into my earphones about 530 and I forgot that I had the volume up from a workout yesterday and Brian was…was loud. And every once in a while throughout the year I do that and my first funny thought is, “why you yelling at me Brian?” And then I laugh out loud to myself because that’s like the last thing in the universe Brian would ever do but it makes me giggle whenever it happens. And then I started thinking about Proverbs 27:14 - if you greet your neighbor loudly in the morning it’s…it’s not taking as a blessing but as a curse and I was giggling some more. So, then I took Rocky out for his walk and I opened the front door and my neighbor was literally pulling out of his driveway for…for work at like 5:40 AM. And, so, I was careful to just wave and smile just a little bit, not too much so I wouldn’t annoy the neighbor and it be taken as a curse and then I laughed again. So, all of this funny stuff pre-coffee that I’m sharing with you all the DAB Campfire and I wanted to give you a few giggles too. And then I was coming home I was rushing because I wore a different jacket and I was so cold and my brain kinda tuned out for about 45 seconds on the…on the Scripture that Brian was reading and at precisely when I opened the front door to get in the house and was thinking, “oh thank God it’s going to be warm again”, precisely. That’s when he was reading, “and the door shall be opened.” So, anyway all this silliness just to give you all a few giggles. I love you. Bye.

Hi, good morning this is Laverne from the UK. This is a message for Lee from Chicago, you called in on the 7th of January. I just want you to know that I couldn’t go any further without getting on my knees and praying and I want you to know that this is what the Lord is saying to you. Do not fear Lee for I am with you. Do not be dismayed for I am thy God. I will strengthen thee, yes, I will help you. I will uphold you with the right hand of my righteousness, that’s Isaiah 41:10. Lee I just need you to know that God holds you. He’s holding you. He’s never stopped holding you and there’s not a tear that doesn’t fall from your eye that He has not caught. He knows every single part of you and He’s with you and He will never ever leave you. And when things seem we’re weakest that’s when He’s there the most. You have to think about when Peter stepped out into the boat and the storm was raging around Him, your only thing is to keep your eyes on Him. That’s all you have to do, and He will, I’m telling you, He will do the rest. He’s done it for me every single time even when I felt it wasn’t there that’s when He was there the most. And I’m telling you now I know that the Daily Audio Bible is holding you up in prayer, whether they get this…whether they record or not, know that they’re praying for you and I’m praying for you my brother and I love you and I just want you to hold on. And if you need anything, call again and we will be there for you. Just hold on. And I also want to say hey to Ben and Bella, thank you for your new year’s message and thank you…and just a hey to __ Pitman welcome to the Daily Audio Bible family. We love you. Keep holding on Lee. I love you. Don’t forget that God’s never left you and He never will. Blessings on you all. Take care family. Bye.

Hi family this is His Welsh Girl. I rung in November asking for prayer because of my anxious thoughts with my daughter’s upcoming wedding and I just wanted to say thank you if you prayed. The wedding was lovely, and God blessed us so much. And I wanted to say thank you to Michael from Arizona. Your message to Anonymous resonated so much and you were talking about how much God loves us and to take thoughts captive and I just wanted to reiterate that, you know, all these thoughts they can just take over our minds and we just need to lay them all down at His feet because He wants to look after us because He loves us so much. I wanted to say, Suzanne who’s been hurt by her family, Carla with the broken heart, and Diana with stage IV cancer, Patsy whose husband left her last Christmas, and Diane Olive Brown, I’m praying for you and Randy from Washington, you sounded so defeated and sad the other day and please know that I’m praying for your marriage. And Brian and family, thank you so much. Brian when you prayed the blessing on New Year’s Eve it was just beautiful, and it just gave me goosebumps. I knew what was coming but it was just wonderful, and I just thank God for this community, this church, this global church. It’s just brilliant. And what a wonderful Father we have. Okay. Thanks. Bye.

Good morning DABbers this is Walta of the Burning Bush that will not be Devoured for the Love and the Glory of our God and King. This morning it is Wednesday, I believe it is…today’s the 8th of January and I am praying for my sister who has a biopsy tomorrow, Thursday because of a growing lump in her left breast. I have the urge to pray for all women who are currently experiencing the same thing. And if you don’t mind, humor me a bit and put your left hand over your left breast and just pray with me. Father God we thank You and praise You oh God for Your beautiful daughters Your princesses. I thank You God that when You made us You said we were good. You made us in all perfection. Holy Father as we draw near to You, we ask You to take away that which is not of You. We ask that You __ every single lump in the breast right now in the name of Jesus. We come against every plan of the enemy to bring…to steal kill and destroy. Father I pray that You’ll __ that lump, shrink it and destroy it. I pray in the name of Jesus and God we pray for complete healing that You take out everything in that body that is not if You. We speak healing…healing over these mothers and over these daughters in the name of Jesus, complete healing. And Father God we pray for all that are going through abnormalities in the chest and breast area. Father we speak healing of God in the name of Jesus. Thank You, God for restoring that which You called perfect in Jesus’ name. Amen.

[dolce-fritz]

So being the new evil girlfriend is fun

So recently my Partner has had some majorly stupid ass drama with their ex. Like this girl, she’s loopier then the Olympic oval, Like normally I’m nice and don’t slander people but like. She’s just, hoo boy. A mess.

And yeah this is from a completely biased stand point. And I’m about to tell you why that I feel the way that I do about this girl from my own experiences. This is going to be long winded, so I’m putting it under a read more. 

So I moved from the lovely state of Utah this year, my homelifes never been 100% great. I love my mom but our issues clash and we do better separate. Not to mention I really wanted to try it out in another state again and this time the right way and not just a spur of the moment decision while i visited like what happened with Florida.

Well, planned my vacation to See my at the time friend to see if I really liked it there.  I knew about their recent split with their Ex, and the two seemed pretty amicable about it. The other roommate was.... hoo, a mess to say the least. and My friend didn't want to be alone with her because they actually had been wanting to tell her to leave because of the issues that she'd brought into the home. anyways that in itself was a bit of drama.

So I was like OK. I'll come check it out and if I like it I'll be your new room mate.

Well. I plan my trip about four weeks out. and end up pretty excited about it. Come to find out with no real surprise that My friends Ex is going to move out before Octobers over.

My friend starts panicking. again doesn't wanna be alone with the other roommate that they're having hardships with. So I say ok... I'm going to do this vacation, then im just going to move on the 20th so I can get my stuff packed.

Shits already starting to go down hill.

I get there. everything seems fine. The ex seems nice, things seem ok. the other roommates.... already trying to cause shit with me and im not even physically in the house. I'm sleeping on a mattress on the floor in an old office space. bought a bunch of furniture because at this point. I know I'm moving here. Its going to happen. This is where I'm going to live might as well help my friend end up getting it taken care of.

Well. Day three of my vacation hits. The ex drops that her dad wants her to move out that day. completely screws the pooch for my friend and the other roommate. And basically bails on them and leaves the house just with the things she wants and then just leaves all the rest of her junk here like its her own storage unit. claims she’ll be back for the rest [ Spoilers never happened]  so that... right there puts this sour taste in my mouth. Cause yeah, me and her ex at that point are sharing a bed. Because like theres only three beds in the house until she ends up leaving and so my friends like ill just sleep with you. me i’m very fine sharing my sleeping space with my friends. i’ve done it literally all my life. hell a its not a goodnight sleep unless your on your best friends bed snuggling the shit out of her kaneki ken body pillow listening to true crime documentaries on the TV but like seriously it was no big deal to me. which im begining to wonder if it was a big deal to her. Either way apparently instead of waiting till i officially moved. she bailed and forced my hand. So I had to stay, I couldn’t properly say goodbye to my mom. couldn’t properly get my shit packed. all cause I really didn’t want to leave my friend alone till I could officially move in. So already, I started getting a slight distaste in my mouth for her. but I let it slide. I know how overbearing parents are sometimes.  well, so i cancelled my flights. money spent that i was never going to end up getting back that I could’ve later used towards something for the house.  The girl left. and I was left, Cleaning up the mess that she walked out of and left behind.  Turns out my friend was the only one that was cleaning up around the house. and working a part time job, while trying to side hustle some art for extra money.  They were the one that was handling all the utilities, while their ex was buying everyone food. Separate it would’ve been an easier task if it was just the two of them. but you add in the extra roommate that was only paying her share of rent and none of the food and utilities and shit starts piling up. Well.  sat down and looked at all the finances. found out that while yeah the Ex was making the most money. She didn’t bother to help out with any of the chores. I mean, they split the dish duty. And i’m sitting here wondering how long this pan of fish oils been on the stove for. had to buy new pans cause they were growing cultures.  Hell half her chores and the other roomates were doing the cat boxes. dude it was shit mountain in there. it was so bad the cats were going in the corner. Yet it was like my friend was expected to pick up after them and pick up their slack because they didn’t work as many hours as the other two. Which I’m sorry. if you can’t balance cleaning up after yourself. and working how the hell are you going to live on your own.  Well in comes me, the living off disability. [ which is not a glorious life] I have a lot of time on my hands. so first few days we douche out the house. things start looking good.  in comes the ex to get something and brings this utter douchebag of a man that boasts about him being the whole reason that they broke up. Which like when we were moving out the ex. the ex’s dads...girlfriend??? was like dont let them take advantage of you. which like made me pull up a shit ton of questionmarks. cause yeah i wasn’t going to let the other roommate do that cause i was kinda aware what her game was and it wasn’t playable with me.  everyone had their part to play in this household, and I wasn’t going to play mother for anyone. Well in comes this guy. boast about how he wont let anyone take advantage of her again and im like sure w/e dude. but like i started like... questioning wtf she was actually telling people that my friend actually did to her.  see, what i was told was that it was an intimacy issue. my friends pretty Asexual so like there wasn’t alot of physical involvement. and that things just weren’t going the way that their ex wanted them to. Turns out it was SOOOO much more then that. so curious me, got digging about this girl cause shit just wasnt really adding up.  and I started finding out things. At this time, friend started turning to partner. and eventually we started dating which made shit a lot more uncomfortable with me and this girl. cause yanno, new girlfriend. ex girlfriend. two things dont usually mesh well in situations like this.  Well so, started finding out that while in a relationship she was leading on a bunch of other guys, and at work would like do this whole “im bi” thing if the guy was cute. like she was very male centered for a “lesbian”  She was super horny on main during DND which made EVERYONE uncomfortable. to top it all off she was a narcissist, that had a victim that she could toy with.  She tried to convince my partners parents while they were still together, to talk to their child when there were behaviours that she didnt like. She tried to have an intervention with their friends to force them into transitioning FtM when they were happy just being nonbinary.  they would gaslight them, manipulate them, and  abuse them. I watched this girl in the span of three weeks tear my partner down with her words in front of me. and be nothing but venomous to them. for no other reason then they were actually happy.   While spining all these stories of how she was the one that was wronged.  Well, I started having enough of her coming around just so she could be mean to my partner. She’d come over. immediately go to our fridge to drink some of the booze she left and then pick at my partner for small insignificant things only because she wanted to fight. When i had enough of that. I told my partner, we’re going to DnD early. she can find her own ride.  She came to a family party, invited unknowingly by my partners brother that’s been over seas and in the military. She thought she was going to get a hookup complained she wasn’t having fun because he wasn’t paying attention to her. Snapped at my partners nephews because they wanted to play and made one of them cry. and was just toxic to be around.  That was strike two.  Strike three was watching how she conducted herself around our dnD group. she’d had this guy, mister “ i saved you from your bad relationship” on speed dial, and would tell him things. and then sit and shit talk him when she was bored with him to everyone. We were all sick of it.  The ending straw with me, was when we finally wanted to be done with this drama. told her three months before hand to get off the car insurance. and it wasn’t done. ended up causing a big thing.  She started saying that she’d leave the DND group to make things easier. because Thats what my partner would want. At this point i couldnt stand it any longer. Three months talking to everyone that physically knows her. and see’s what she’s becoming lead everyone to say the same thing about her She was turning into her mother.  No i know fuck all about that. i dont know her mother, i dont know anything about her. I know she’s on a shot that fucks with your brain and ends up messing with your body. I also was on the DEPO shot for three years of my life and its caused so many problems after i was off it.  and thats what i tried to impart to her my wisdom on.  therapy, and a depo shot.  now how we got there is really long winded, and highly dramatic.  id admitted to her our dnd group wanted to chat. she was pushy, respected no ones boundaries, and left our friends house a complete mess. just like she left ours... and god, she ended up pissing me off cause the girl left slippers caked in cat puke in my tub after staining my bathroom doing her hair dye. she disrespected my home, she disrespected out friends, and our friends home. and she was needlessly mean and cruel to everyone around her that didnt serve some purpose to her.  So yeah she had to go.  Here i am thinking that this is the end of it. but i get updates about how I’m apparently the worst abuser in the world just cause I told some spoiled brat of a woman to get off a shot that messes with the brain, and to seek therapy cause this girl needs help. Funny thing is im not the only one that said it. apprently just the loudest voice to have said it.  and this bitch still thinks i dont like her cause she’s not ‘ providing for us financially” We may not have a high roller life. but damn we’re doing just fucking fine. 

[nageki-yuki-blog]

Tsukiuta Mini-Drama “Make my day” Translation

This track is from Hajime’s solo album “Aa. Kami wo Nadete, Hoho wo Nadete, Omae wo Aishite yaru”.  It features Hajime and Shun.~

[I also want to give credit to @saikiyuuki because they helped clarify a lot of things and translate some parts, since I had trouble understanding a ton in this drama.  Thank you very much, my leader, Hajime-san~ ^^]

Hajime:  Good grief.  I was finally able to sneak away.  (Sigh)… The New Year’s gathering... No…  I guess it’s just because it’s the New Year?  There were so many ceremonies, greetings, and meetings, that it’s no wonder I’m exhausted.  And the kimono…  The fact the kimono makes one stand up straight with their head held high is something I don't dislike but, I have not worn it in a while and it makes me restless.

 00:43

 For who normally has to run around from place to place nonstop, the moment someone says it’s only for New Year’s I am not good with it… When it’s nothing but strict formal gatherings, it makes my shoulders stiff.  I understand that there’s a meaning for each and every one but, couldn’t they make them just a little more simple?  (Sigh)

 01:04

 Right now, the guys in the dorms are probably, sitting under the kotatsu* and being completely carefree.  I wish I could join them too.

[*table covered in blanket with heater underneath]

 01:18

 Shun:  Ahehe. I have found the black king, from the New Year’s gathering, that yearns for the outside world.

 Hajime:  Oh, Shun? Why are you here?

 Shun:  Greetings, Hajime.  I don’t think you have to be that surprised, since tomorrow is…

 Hajime:  The Mutsuki’s and Shimotsuki’s ceremony for the start of the new year, right…

 Shun:  That’s right. The Mutsuki and Shimotsuki households are like the positive and the negative, the special and the ordinary… They have a relationship that is bound by fate that couldn’t be severed even if you tried.  It’s so we can exchange new year’s greetings with all the members of the family gathered.  I decided to make a visit ahead of time, and came to see Hajime’s face.  How are you doing?~

 Hajime:  Whether it’s just for greetings or not…  It hasn’t even been a week since we all separated at the dorms before the new year.

 Shun:  I guess you’re right.  But during the time that we didn’t see each other, the old year has left, and a new year has arrived.  Happy New Year, Hajime.  May the heavens shine brilliantly upon your lineage in the new year as well.

 Hajime:  Shun… Yeah, you’re right.  Happy New Year.  I pray that it will be a very good year for you.

 Shun:  Hehe… After just receiving a blessing from Gravi’s leader and the black king, Hajime, it has definitely given me more strength.

 Hajime:  Yeah, yeah. Right, the ceremony for the new year. Last year, my family went to go see the Shimotsukis, so this year I’m on the welcoming side.

 Shun:  Yeah. Meeting Hajime and walk around together during winter in Kyoto, which is surrounded by nature, sounds like it would be very enjoyable but…  Being in beautifully decorated winter Tokyo sounds great too.  Well, for someone who currently resides in a dorm in Tokyo, I guess I have gotten used to the sight.

 Hajime:  As usual, you do things at your own pace.

 Shun:  Aha.  I am always, no matter where I go, being myself. I am as I am.

 Hajime:  Hmm. Hold on.  We’re going that way.

 Shun:  Okay~.

 03:40

 Shun:  Hmm~. It’s very peaceful.  I would never think this would be Tokyo, let alone a place close to the city center.

 Hajime:  All around us, it’s a quiet residential area where people don’t move in or out very often.

 Shun:  There’s also a lot of green.

 Hajime:  Yeah. I also like this garden.  It’s calming.

 Shun:  It certainly is calming.  I wonder if it’s because there are so many large trees?

 Hajime:  Hmm. That tree there, it’s the oldest cherry tree at my home.  That one’s my favorite.

 Shun:  Certainly. Even during this season when there are no flowers or leaves, it still gives off a magnificent feeling.

 Hajime:  Lying down under that tree feels good.  It’s also great when the flowers are blooming, and when it gives shade during the summer.  Incidentally, this is also where I got to know Haru*.

[*Haru also means spring, so this part also means “where I began to like spring.”]

 Shun:  Haru? Rather than meaning the season of spring, I wonder if you’re referring to Yayoi-kun?

 Hajime:  Hah, I don’t like the way you said that.  Well, you’re right.  I meant Yayoi-kun.  He would occasionally come over to my house to play.

 Shun:  Huuuh?~ I bet it would be beautiful when the flowers are blooming.  I want to see it too.

 Hajime:  It’s okay if you come.  (Sigh) Well…  It would be nice if we called Kai and the others from the dorms, and did a flower viewing.  It’s good to be lively once in a while too.

 05:20

 Hajime:  I should be used to seeing this house’s garden, but to look around like this once again, it feels a little strange.  Kind of nostalgic, and kind of unfamiliar…  Even though this is a place where I used to play and hide in the thickets here and there.

 Shun:  Seems like it.  I heard that when Hajime was little, he was extremely mischievous and made his family have to search for him many times.

 Hajime:  Whose information was that?

 Shun:  Mutsuki’s princess, wait that’s wrong…  Hajime’s mother.

 Hajime:  (Sigh) She is so…  Or rather, why have you talked to my mother about those kinds of things?

 Shun:  Ahahaha~. We’ve been acquaintances for a while but…  Right now I am working alongside the princess’s precious only son, Hajime.  To be particular, since we have a connection, I wanted to make it personal.*

[*meaning that he wanted to get to know her because of their connection through Hajime.]

 Hajime:  That’s a combination that I absolutely did not want to be connected.  Shun, don’t you start asking any unnecessary questions and telling the others about it.

 Shun:  Hmmm.~ What should I do?~

 Hajime:  This time, I also want to have a thorough conversation with your parents.

 Shun:  That sounds great!  I’m sure they will be extremely delighted!  The Shimotsuki family has been huge fans of the Mutsuki family for generations.~

 Hajime:  (Annoyed sigh)  That was sarcasm.

 Shun:  I know.~

 Hajime:  (Sigh)

 07:01

 Hajime:  Being peaceful is good but, this kind of hustle and bustle is also nice.

 Shun:  Oh, that’s an unexpected thought.  I thought Hajime hated crowds?

 Hajime:  I don’t hate them but…  (Sigh) I never really liked them.  I would never intentionally go out of my way to enter into the crowd.  It’s not like that now either.  Occasionally, it’s good.  Being in a place where there are many people, I have come to discover the joy of becoming a part of the scenery.

 Shun:  Becoming a part of the scenery…  Hajime has a strong presence after all.  I think it would be impossible for you to blend in with the surroundings.

 Hajime:  That’s you, isn’t it?  You stand out because you’re so white.

 Shun:  Is it really an issue of color?  See, just like I am now, I am concealing myself with my mysterious powers.~ That’s why it’s fine.

 Hajime:  That’s very ambiguous but, seems convenient.  The gazes I usually feel somehow, are certainly gone today.

 Shun:  Eh-hem! If the high quality nature of my power accompanies Hajime’s wishes as well, then that makes it even more powerful.

 Hajime:  Is that so?

 Shun:  So he just went along with it...

 08: 30

 Shun:  Hajime. There’s more people than usual so it’s very lively.

 Hajime:  Yeah. Everyone has a lot of bags.

 Shun:  I’ve never gone to one before, but You said he looks forward to the beginning of the new year because of things like New Year’s sales and lucky grab bags.

 Hajime:  The other guys also said they would be going around to several places here and there but… They invited me to come with them once I get home.

 Shun:  I was also invited.  Haha. About that conversation we just had about crowds, it’s possible that living a dormitory life surrounded by the similarly enjoyable and lively members, along with our work as idols, has gotten you used to being surrounded by a great number of people.

 Hajime:  Well… That’s true.  That’s a big possibility.  Even though I wondered what would happen in the beginning, it didn’t turn out bad.

 Shun:  Such a kind expression.  However, just like Hajime, there are also parts of me that have changed because of everyone’s influence.

 Hajime:  Hmm. Which part?

 Shun:  In my case, let me see…  Before I met everyone, I just enjoyed viewing the scenery from afar.  Now, that part must be how I was able to join everyone.

 Hajime:  Viewing the scenery from afar…  I only know how you are now, so I can’t imagine.  You’re always right in the middle of any disturbances, aren’t you?

 Shun:  Hehe. If it appears that way then I’m happy.

 10:10

 Shun:  Although… I wonder if it’s okay that we both came out together…  Won’t your family get angry?

 Hajime:  It doesn’t matter.  The New Year’s ceremony is tomorrow.  There’s no need to stay inside the house.

 Shun:  It doesn’t appear that your family thinks the same way though.  The driver who brought us here, seems to be relentlessly following us from behind.  See… He’s looking at us from over there. For him to be able to surmount my concealment, he must have some serious concentration.  Hello!~

 Hajime:  Shun! Don’t wave your hand.  Seriously… Even though I said I’d be fine taking the train home.

 Shun:  They think you are going to try to escape in a second.

 Hajime:  Yeah, yeah, I know.  You don’t have any faith in me.

 Shun:  You don’t have to pout.~  If it was about anything else then that wouldn’t be the case, it’s only in relation to this situation.*

[*If this is confusing, it means Shun would have faith in Hajime in pretty much everything else except this situation]

 Hajime:  Shun.

 Shun:  What is it, Hajime?

 Hajime:  First of all, let’s lose him.

 Shun:  So we’re going to lose him first, huh.

 Hajime:  Who is the one that takes along companions*, so he can be aimless, despite being old enough to know better?

[*also means attendants]

 Shun:  Now then, my degree of trust in Hajime has fallen even farther.

 Hajime:  I might as well make it lower completely then.  Plus, if he is trying to supervise us, he won’t make the mistake of letting us escape that easily, right?

 Shun:  I see. Well then, let’s have our first fun of the new year making our big escape.

 Hajime:  Now you’re talking.  Alright! Let’s go, Shun!

 Shun:  Roger that.

[I had this translated for a while but somehow I completely forgot to post it ^^; I just recently noticed the file was still on my computer and figured out that I never posted it > <]

[btw I haven’t been translating as much lately because I’ve been trying to use my winter break time to make some cosplays~ ^^;  I promise I’ll get back to translating more when I can~]

[tomorrowedblog]

Friday Releases for February 19

Friday is the busiest day of the week for new releases, so we've decided to collect them all in one place. Friday Releases for February 19 include I Care A Lot, Body Brokers, It’s A Sin, and more.

I Care A Lot

I Care A Lot, the new movie from J. Blakeson, is out today.

I CARE A LOT follows Marla Grayson (Rosamund Pike), a highly successful legal guardian with a knack for exploiting the law to her financial benefit. After discovering her seemingly innocent new client (Dianne Wiest) harbors dangerous secrets, Marla and her partner (Eiza González) come to find they have unknowingly triggered a battle with a ruthless adversary (Peter Dinklage).

Body Brokers

Body Brokers, the new movie from John Swab, is out today.

Utah and Opal are junkies living on the streets of rural Ohio until a seemingly chance encounter with the enigmatic Wood brings them to Los Angeles for drug treatment. Utah appears to find sobriety with the help of treatment center shrink, Dr. White, and tech turned love interest, May. They soon learn that drug treatment is but a cover for a predatory business, enlisting addicts to recruit other addicts.

Blithe Spirit

Blithe Spirit, the new movie from Edward Hall, is out today.

Best-selling crime novelist Charles (Dan Stevens) suffers from terrible writer’s block and is struggling to finish his first screenplay. His picture-perfect new wife Ruth (Isla Fisher) is doing her best to keep him focused so they can fulfill her dream of leaving London for Hollywood. Charles’ quest for inspiration leads him to invite the eccentric mystic Madame Acarti (Judi Dench) to perform a séance in his home. He gets more than he bargained for when Madame Acarti inadvertently summons the spirit of his first wife: the brilliant and fiery Elvira (Leslie Mann). Ready to pick up her life right where she left off, Elvira is shocked to discover the prim and proper Ruth is now married to her husband and running her household. Charles finds himself stuck between his two wives and their increasingly over-the-top attempts to outdo one another in this lethally hilarious comedy.

Test Pattern

Test Pattern, the new movie from Shatara Michelle Ford, is out today.

Part psychological horror, part realist drama, this exhilarating debut feature from Shatara Michelle Ford is set against the backdrop of national discussions around inequitable health care and policing, the #metoo movement, and race in America. Test Pattern follows an interracial couple whose relationship is put to the test after a Black woman is sexually assaulted and her white boyfriend drives her from hospital to hospital in search of a rape kit. Their story reveals the systemic injustices and social conditioning women face when navigating sex and consent within the American patriarchy.

The Violent Heart

The Violent Heart, the new movie from Kerem Sanga, is out today.

Fifteen years after the murder of his older sister, 24-year-old Daniel finds himself falling for Cassie, an outgoing high school senior, in this Romeo & Juliet-style thriller set in the American heartland.

Silk Road

Silk Road, the new movie from Tiller Russell, is out today.

Inspired by larger-than-life actual events, this riveting crime thriller follows the rise and fall of Silk Road, the infamous darknet site that sent a seismic shock through the World Wide Web. Young, idealistic, and driven to succeed, Ross Ulbricht (Nick Robinson) creates the internet’s first unregulated marketplace: Silk Road. But when it becomes a multimillion-dollar pipeline for illicit drugs, Ross is set on a collision course with Rick Bowden (Jason Clarke), a disreputable and dangerously unpredictable DEA agent, who will use any means necessary to take him down.

Paranormal Prison

Paranormal Prison, the new movie from Brian Jagger, is out today.

The impending demolition of an abandoned prison has the paranormal investigation team “The Skeptic and the Scientist” rushed to spend a locked-in night within the prison’s walls before the wrecking balls start swinging turning the now state historical building to condos.

Knowing their channel needs views, team leader Matthew (Todd Haberkorn) funds one last-ditch effort in hopes the device science expert Sara (Paris Warner) has invented will be their ticket to fame and fortune. Along with their sound technician Ashley (Coryn Treadwell), cameraman Jacob (Brian Telestai) and guided by their assigned park ranger, the team recorded everything, hoping to capture elusive spirits. What they captured instead will change paranormal investigation forever, and may have even solved a long-standing mystery.

Tribes of Europa

Tribes of Europa, the new TV series from Philip Koch, is out today.

2074. In the wake of a mysterious global disaster, war rages between the Tribes that have emerged from the wreckage of Europe. Three siblings from the peaceful Origines tribe - Kiano (Emilio Sakraya), Liv (Henriette Confurius) and Elja (David Ali Rashed) - are separated and forced to forge their own paths in an action-packed fight for the future of this new Europa.

It’s A Sin

It’s A Sin, the new TV series from Russell T. Davies, is out today.

It's 1981, and a gang of friends move in together in the heart of London. As the decade unfolds, we follow their hopes and dreams, highs and lows, all coming out and coming of age. But a terrible new virus is on the rise, and they’ll need each other more than ever as the fight begins.

Tell Me Your Secrets

Tell Me Your Secrets, the new TV series from Harriet Warner, is out today.

Emma is ready to start her new life in witness protection. When Mary, a mother searching for her missing daughter, discovers that Emma might be responsible for her daughter’s disappearance she hires an ex-serial predator to track Emma down. And no one is safe.

For All Mankind S2

The second season of For All Mankind, the TV series from Ronald D. Moore, Ben Nedivi, and Matt Wolpert, is out today.

Told through the lives of NASA astronauts, engineers and their families, For All Mankind presents an aspirational world where NASA and the space program remained a priority and a focal point of our hopes and dreams.

The Shore

The Shore, the new game from Ares Dragonis, is out today.

THE SHORE is a first person story driven game with an atmospheric environment and narrations, You will encounter mysterious creatures and unravel the secrets behind them. Strong elements of horror, struggle to survive an unknown world that will make you question your own sanity.

[kincringeemporium]

"How Do I Stop Being Kin!?”: A Helpful Guide (Long Post)

so... yup. tumblr ate some of my archive, including one of my most important posts: a list of steps on how to distance yourself from the kin community. as there’s no way (that i know of) to get that post back... here’s this! 

how to use the guide: all complaints/problems that kin frequently send when they don’t want to be kin anymore? those are in large bold. each complaint has a list of steps on how to solve it; the steps (my responses) are just in the normal font. don’t see what you need? send an ask saying you want to see it in a part 2! 

“I don’t want to be kin with (x) anymore!” 

okay! this one centers mostly around keeping lists. and as i said to the most recent anon, the first step toward stopping is wanting to stop. 

1. get two separate sheets of paper (or start digital documents you can print later). on one, write “(Your Name) List”. on the other, write “(Kintype Name) List.” 

2. fill the YN List first. write down every one of your own traits that you can name. they can relate to appearance, gender, hobbies/interests, mental health, neurodiversity, hopes and aspirations, etc. these do not all have to be good things. try to have a 1/3, 1/3, 1/3 balance of good, bad, and neutral traits. (an example of a bad trait/habit is “nail biting”, because that’s harmful. not “brown hair”. if you don’t like your hair color put “brown hair” down as a neutral trait. it’s not bad, you just want a different color.) 

3. fill the KN (kintype name) list next. do not use “i”, “we”, “myself”, in this list becase it’s not about you. 

  • if it’s a fictional character, write down facts relating to the character’s creation. who’s the author/designer/creator? what year was the source released? what type of media is the source -- a fantasy book, a video game, a movie? emphasize that the character is fictional, not real (add ‘in this universe’ if you believe in the multiverse theory) and cannot be reincarnated. 

• if it’s an animal, write down all of its behaviors: does it eat meat? what sounds does it make? is it dangerous or not? now, if you believe in reincarnation, it’s way more plausible that animals can be reincarnated and their next lives can be as humans. emphasize that even if you were the animal in a past life, you are a human now -- it is not healthy to think you literally still are the animal and/or to behave like it. 

•  if it’s a part of nature, like a star or a tree, write down all the facts about it that you know and emphasize that it is not sentient, it doesn’t have a soul, and it cannot make choices or be reincarnated. 

keep the lists with you (as a physical copy/paper). 

4. tell yourself that it’s okay to like the character, animal, or thing, it’s okay to feel that it represents part of who you are. it’s okay to feel comforted by it when you’ve had a shitty day or you’re in a bad mood. feeling these things does not automatically make you kin. write these down on a small piece of paper and keep the paper with you. 

5. even though it is okay to like the character/animal/thing, slowly start avoiding content that includes it. if you are trying to stop being fictionkin, do not watch the source. stay away from fanfic, pictures, etc, that make you have strong emotions about it. 

6. if you ever are feeling guilty about something your kintype did (and this applies mostly to villain kin), you are projecting. whether you’re feeling guilty about your own mistakes without realizing, or you want the chance to fix something/apologize, you are projecting. if you are acting out what you really, really want the villain to do -- ie, you relate to them strongly but they’re not repentant and you want them to be... rp. start a roleplay blog, write a redemption au. look back at your lists again. 

• if it’s not a villain, but you’re feeling guilty about something bad your kintype did, still do a bit of rp and keep looking back at those lists! 

7. whenever you have “kinfeels” or “kin memories”, look at your YN and KN lists. read them to remind yourself that you are not the same person as the character, not the same being as the animal, and not something inanimate. 

8. try new things and (now i’m not saying this to be a bitch) go outside. i mean it. vitamin d is good for you. you don’t have to exercise, but if you are able to, go for it. visit the library, the park, a coffee shop, the mall, anywhere. test out new hobbies, like 

• writing fiction (could be about the character/animal/thing, if this is how you maintain a connection with it while not identifying as it) 

 • traditional drawing  

 • digital drawing 

 • sewing, knitting, or crochet 

• writing movie critiques/analyses 

• jewelry making 

• making non-kin-related selfcare 

• sports 

“I want to get out of the community, but I’m not ready to let go of my kintypes!” 

so you’re not ready? okay. this is still your first step. you will fuck yourself over badly if you push yourself to 100% stop being kin before you can function without it. this is true in situations like abusive households or trauma: if you pretend that you’re someone else who’s never had to deal with those things, you are using escapism to let off stress and unwind. 

1. change your blog theme. i know it sounds dumb and unrelated. however, having a visual change will make you more inclined to change other things -- and it will start to tell other people in the community that you are able to change. 

2. update your about, kin page, and byf. take things like “don’t follow if you don’t see me as (kintype)”, “no doubles”, and kin-related discourse out of those pages. anything that typically appears in kin cringe comps? take it out. (look through my blog for example of typical cringe comp material.) 

• don’t say “literally me”, “100% me”, “ID” about the kintypes you list. 

• instead of having separate sections for “primary”, “secondary”, “tertiary”, things like that... just say “kintypes” once and list them/insert their pictures. 

• do NOT link to others’ blogs saying “this person is my (canonmate name)!” or “i found my (important canonmate)! 

• whatever your stance on ace discourse... take that out of your pages. i have no idea why, but the kin community is fucking overrun with people thinking that aces/aros aren’t lgbtq+. removing this discourse from your blog will remove you from another common kin community behavior. (it’s totally okay to post ace/aro positivity, but don’t involve yourself in heavy discourse and don’t put “Aces/aros are/aren’t lgbtq!” on your about/kinpage/byf.) 

3. if you list kin friends or kin blogs on one of your pages, consider taking out the links and just describing the friends/blogs. this will distance your blog from the network of kin on here. 

4. instead of requesting “kintype selfcare/positivity” from those kin resource blogs: 

• reblog aesthetics that remind you of the kintypes, but is not labeled as “(kintype) aesthetic”. 

• make some aesthetics yourself based on the kintypes. if you’re tagging, then just use general tags (ie, “kin”, “otherkin”, or “fictionkin”), not specifically the character’s name or the type of animal you identify with. 

• write positive affirmations for yourself, such as “i got enough sleep so this will be a better day!” or “i didn’t lie in bed all day so i feel motivated!” or “i ate something healthy instead of junk food!” 

• if you’re writing affirmations specifically about a kintype, don’t refer to the kintype using “i” or “we”. instead, write “(character) tries their best to fix wrongdoings, so i will too!” or “(character) makes an effort to overcome anxiety, so i’m going to try harder too!” or “(animal) isn’t inherently bad/gross; it’s trying to survive like me!” 

• basically, when writing positivity/affirmations, pick a trait that the kintype has that you want to have too. don’t just say “i have this trait because i am (kintype)!” 

• sorry not sorry, but the overwhelming majority of the positivity on those blogs is useless. it might make you feel better for a couple minutes, but it’s superficial. even if the person running the blog genuinely wants people to feel better, they are still operating under the obligation to give positivity. 

it is not as genuine as it should be. the person doesn’t know who you are, and they might not know a lot about the kintype. the positivity from those blogs is generic, ie, “even if you’ve done some bad things, you’re not a bad person!” You need specifics, which only you can come up with -- because only you know yourself. when something is vague or general, we think deep down that it’s not true. (btw, that’s the same psychology behind the “sounds fake but okay” meme.)

5. if your mutuals get into kin drama, or if you see kin drama on your dash, stay out of it. it does not matter right now if these people are your best friends in the world, because once the drama dies down, your url is still all over those posts. even if the people who started the drama delete the posts, other people have everything saved. the things you said in anger or anxiety or whatever are still on tumblr. and tumblr has an extremely difficult time recognizing that what someone said three months ago doesn’t define what they say now. 

6. unfollow people who have ‘typical cringe comp material’ on their pages and/or people who frequently are involved in drama. 

• if they have “ask to unfollow” on their pages, unfollow anyway. if they harass you about it, block them (and maybe report for... violating community guidelines. or harassment). DON’T PUT THIS ON YOUR PAGES. EVER. FOLLOWING YOU IS NOT A CHORE. MAKING PEOPLE ASK PERMISSION TO UNFOLLOW YOU CAN CAUSE THEM HUGE AMOUNTS OF ANXIETY. IT’S SHITTY AND ENTITLED. DON’T DO IT. 

7. if you’re going to send hate to antis, i can’t stop you, but for fuck’s sake, do that on anon. (”what!?” you say as you read this post. “but don’t antis think anon hate is cowardly!?”) you just don’t want to be known as someone active enough in the community to send off-anon shit. 

8. if i have or another anti/cringe blog has screenshotted your post/page, ask for it to be removed. no promises that other blogs will remove your stuff, but here on kce and over at @only-on-tomblr, we will. having your content up on popular cringe blogs can definitely get you recognized among the community, and you don’t want that. 

“I don’t want to rely so hard on being kin -- I want kin to be a casual thing!” 

1. first off, follow the “i want to get out of the community” list. you don’t have to stop identifying as kin, you just need to distance yourself from that network of over the top, hardcore kin people. 

2. recognize that kin is your coping mechanism. it is okay to use escapism (that’s what kin is tbh) to cope. it is okay to step away from reality, unwind, then go back to reality after a few hours of doing kin stuff/rp. 

3. recognize that any coping mechanism is going to be harmful when you take it too far. when it goes too far, it becomes an obsession. (because i am sure someone’s going to say this, i’m not dragging special interests. those are not the same as coping mechanisms gone wrong and this post does not relate to special interests.) 

4. guess what? you don’t need just one coping mechanism. and because you’re not completely dropping the kintypes, you need to focus your kin-related energy into a creative outlet. what i mean by that is... write about them. draw pictures of them. do commissions, even for people who have the same kintype. not to mention, if you write about/draw them a lot, you are getting so much better at those skills. 

5. optional: it would also help to make lists of your traits and the kintypes’ traits, like in the first section of this post. 

6. as with the other sections, do not refer to the kintypes as “myself”/”i”. 

that’s about it 

Other things you can do 

• write a brief analysis of an episode, movie, chapter, etc in which the character/kintype appears. what does the person/being do and why? how do their actions result in the episode/chapter/game/movie ending? how do other characters react to it? and how is this different from what you would do, right now, if you were in the same situation? (obviously no one has to see it, so doesn’t matter if it sucks) 

• interact with people who have the same kintype so you can become more comfortable with “doubles” and thus be less intense about being kin 

• when you’re watching/reading/playing/listening to new media (’source’), and you begin to have “kinfeels” for someone, step back. put the book down. pause the show or podcast. remind yourself that this is fiction. even if the multiverse does exist, your kintype cannot cross between universes and ‘be’ you. you are most likely projecting onto the character or you are inspired to create a similar character/oc. 

• aaand.... here it comes... oh god. oh no. limit your time on tumblr. do not spend all day on this forsaken hellsite.  

Things to absolutely NOT do 

• post anything like “why did the author put me/kintype in a relationship with a girl!? i’m gay!” all that does is imply that you think you have some kind of ownership over someone else’s character. it makes you look like you want everything to go your way -- and not everything can. i am not saying that to be a jerk. 

• ask people to unfollow you. as i said before (now, i don’t have anxiety so this isn’t from firsthand experience), do you have any idea how much anxiety that causes people? and how shitty a thing it is to do? 

• harass someone over being a double 

• tell them to unfollow/stop interacting because they are a double 

• compare being kin to being trans or nonbinary. for fuck’s sake. there’s no such thing as a “kingender”.

                     - even if your kintype was female in ‘your source’, but wasn’t                                  female in canon... that does not mean you are trans and it does                            not mean the kintype is trans.    

                    - even if you are trans yourself, it has absolutely nothing to do with                        you identifying as kin. they are not related. you are a trans person                        who also happens to be kin.    

                   - things like “canidgender: a gender that feels tough and ready to                           defend, a gender that makes you feel alert, a gender that....” are not                     real. gender is not an emotion. besides, these descriptions have                            nothing to do with gender. 

  • say that you have dysphoria about your kintype. again, if you have dysphoria, it’s because you are transgender/nonbinary. you do not have “species dysphoria” about your astral ears. just because it’s listed on google with a definition does not mean it’s legit. 

• use ‘kin pronouns’ like glitch/glitchs/glitchself. ne/nes/neself. star/stars/starself. it/its. the very concept of kin pronouns suggests that gender is automatically tied to kin. it’s not. and you are not an object. 

• send people hate or get into discourse about headcanons involving your kintype 

• tag art as “me” or “kin” or “id”. even if the artist says it’s okay, avoiding this is another way to distance yourself from a harmful community. if you need/want to keep a tagging system, just tag it with the character’s name or the type of animal. 

• tell someone that they are “your (important canonmate). 

• especially do not tell someone that your characters dated and that you must begin a romantic relationship because of that! 

• insist that someone just has to remember something that you remember! here’s an appropriate exchange on this. 

              you: “do you remember when our kintypes had that huge fight, then                     made up and dated for a few months? we drifted apart and stopped                    dating.” 

              them: “no... i recall something different.” 

               you: “oh. well, that’s okay!” 

comments i just know i’m going to get (they’re useless. don’t post them and don’t send them to me) 

• you’re policing our identities! 

•you can’t dictate how we cope! 

• you can’t take away our fun! 

• how would you know how this stuff works? you’re not kin! 

• ableist! 

• go do something productive! 

• i don’t care. i’m doing these things anyway! 

-k 

[centurydivlawjournalqpxl605-blog]

When To Tell Your Wife You Want To Divorce

If you're the one breaking the news you want a separation or the one listening in silence when your companion informs you your marital relationship mores than, no matter. You remain in misery anyhow. When do you persuade your companion you want a separation that does not leave you both anymore busted than you are?

Ways to Tell Your Spouse You Desired Separation

Take the talk.

No one anticipates jumping into a conversation that might bring them right into a fight. Few individuals love bring problem. Yet even if a conversation would certainly be made complex doesn't indicate you don't have to.

No matter if you're 5 months or half a century married. It doesn't matter what your partner did in your marital relationship. Prior to you inform your companion that you want a divorce, you or your children require to have the talk with your partner, face to face.

Just walk out the door eventually as well as never go back to your marital relationship or life. Allowing the Sheriff serve your companion with a summons isn't fine until you even discuss the word divorce. "Inform your companion you desire a divorce.

You want a divorce-Surprised man offered with Summons

Be secure.

When there's a threat your partner could come to be physically abusive, see to it the discussion remains in a public location. And also, see to it you have actually obtained another person with you damaging the information.

Bring a pre-programmed mobile phone to dial "911" pressing a button. When you're alone with your companion, see to it you know where you are and also what you're doing.

Arrange to stick with another person for a minimum of a few days. Going home when he/ she is upset and also might turn aggressive threatens.

Being very easy.

Broach how you would certainly really feel if anyone offered you problem. Look for not to blur why you desire separation when you remain in the center of somebody else's dispute.

Strategy when as well as how to inform your partner you desire divorce. Select a location to get some privacy.

Ask your partner straight. Should not take the coward's way out and also either send out an email or message or, worse still, in fact disappear without telling your partner something.

Be Fair and also Kind

Be clear. Beating around the bush concerning getting a divorce will not make the talk any type of easier, nor does it make the news less frustrating.

Quit condemning your companion for glitch with your household. Take responsibility for your decision, framework your discussion on the requirement to move on as well as your feelings.

Withstand need to defeat your companion, or use this discussion to point out completely he/ she has actually harmed you in the past. You do not need to flaunt any brand-new relationship details in your partner's face.

Be Frank.

Do not route your partner. Don't provide him any kind of false hope. When there's no chance you'll integrate, state.

If you certainly assume you want a divorce, then do not consent to a "court split" only since it appears easier.

If you have an event, and also your partner tells you, do not lie. (Yes, I understand this is a difficult one, particularly if you live in a state where your adultery will certainly impact whether you obtain aid or just how your home is separated. However: a) chances are, your spouse will at some point uncover the truth anyway; and b) note that, at the end of the day, you will always have to live with yourself.) Require time.

Do not expect to tell your companion you want a separation 10 mins prior to you (or your other half or other half) go to work. Hard conversations take some time.

You can think of separation for months (or years!). Yet this is most likely your partner's initial understanding that separating is a real possibility. Perhaps he/ she want to consider it!

When the talk is short because your partner storms in a mad huff, that's perfect. What counts is that you're able to offer this type of essential talk the moment it is entitled to.

Don't battle.

Just because divorce conversation can be made complex, that does not suggest it needs to finish in a war.

Withstand the temptation to intentionally inform your partner or press his/ her switches as well as begin an argument. Suggesting, accusing or disparaging your companion can make a hard discussion 100 times even worse.

When your partner wants to select a battle or addresses you angrily, don't allow yourself enter the battle or respond in anger. Additionally, be prepared to call. Put your talk on hold until you and your companion can come back peacefully.

Do not include children.

Your kids shouldn't be around while you and your partner discuss divorce. Ever. Ever before. Time. Time.

And also if among the factors for separation includes your youngsters, that does not suggest they require to be part of any kind of separation discussion.

It coincides if the kids are grownups. Just since they might not be youngsters suggests they are no longer your kids. They're, as well as they're constantly, your children. You must note that and be a mama. That suggests shielding your kids from separation.

Get ready for an Unfavorable Reaction.

Despite exactly how well you assume you recognize your companion, you will never know exactly how he/ she will reply to your separation news prior to you tell him/ her you want a separation.

Your companion can get angry or distressed. He or she can differ or begin verbally attacking you. Or, he/ she may ask or threaten you not to leave. Or, your spouse can take out, say nothing.

While you can not anticipate your partner's response, if you have actually prepared yourself at least emotionally to prepare for the different means your spouse may respond, you'll be much better able to manage your partner's action when it occurs.

" Incredible" break up interactions only occur in flicks. That's http://centuryfamlawguidedxke198.theglensecret.com/tell-your-partner-you-re-ready-for-divorce due to the fact that some screenwriter had weeks to claim best terms. Then some actors rehearsed those words before speaking them.

Although your life isn't the like Hollywood motion picture (although at times it might seem like a daytime drama!), discovering your way of telling your partner you desire a divorce ahead of time will assist you coordinate your thoughts and also share your message in a much more favorable as well as sensitive means.

Don't Study Unnecessary Facts

In separation, as in life, there is such a thing as "excessive info." You might have been considering obtaining a divorce for a long time. You might have worked out every information of what you desire your new life to look like. However, when you first tell your spouse you want a separation, you do NOT require to speak about when you desire him or her to move out, exactly how you are mosting likely to split your home, and also that is going to get the kids. (And, for heaven's sake, DON'T give your partner a spread sheet that information exactly how you want to split every little thing from the retirement accounts to the Tupperware!) If your partner wants to get into those kinds of information so soon, wonderful! Then you can have those conversations. But lots of people are mosting likely to need time to refine the fact that they are getting separated before they will certainly have the ability to talk about what will certainly occur once the divorce is over.

Include Your Partner in Your Choice, if You Can.

Determining to separation is extremely individual. Whether you talk to your partner concerning your choice before it is set in stone, depends on you. Yet, blindsiding your spouse with the information that you desire a divorce is hardly ever a great idea. Your partner is far more likely to respond severely if s/he had no idea that your marital relationship was in serious trouble. While you might believe that just a full fool might miss out on the reality that your marital relationship is a mess, do not presume that your spouse sees the very same issues that you do. What's more, "hinting" at the trouble does not assist. If you are seriously considering separation, tell your partner that. Obviously, your partner may not believe you. Or, s/he might select to ignore you. You can not manage that. However a minimum of you will certainly have tried to not to blindside our clueless partner.

Claiming "I Want a Separation" is Never ever Very easy Whatever you do, having "the divorce discussion" is never ever easy. It is uncomfortable, unpleasant, and also can perhaps contain conflict. Yet, the way you begin your separation matters. The means you inform your partner that you want a divorce issues. If the very first time your spouse finds out that you desire a divorce is when she reviews it in a news release (yes, it really happens), you can't be shocked if your divorce quickly develops into a war. Inflicting pain on your partner triggers you pain, too. On the other hand, if you approach your partner with generosity, empathy, as well as level of sensitivity, you will certainly have a much better chance of making your divorce as relaxed as feasible.

[modernfamlawguidevljf561]

Tell Your Husband You Want To Divorce

If you're the one breaking the information you desire a separation or the one eavesdroping silence when your partner tells you your marriage mores than, it doesn't matter. You remain in misery anyway. When do you convince your companion you want a divorce that doesn't leave you both anymore broken than you are?

Ways to Inform Your Partner You Desired Separation

Take the talk.

No one eagerly anticipates jumping into a discussion that might bring them into a conflict. Couple of individuals love bring problem. Yet even if a conversation would certainly be made complex does not imply you don't need to.

No matter if you're 5 months or half a century married. It matters not what your partner performed in your marriage. Prior to you tell your partner that you desire a divorce, you or your youngsters require to have the talk with your partner, in person.

Simply go out the door eventually and also never ever go back to your marriage or life. Allowing the Constable serve your companion with a summons isn't alright until you also mention words separation. "Inform your companion you desire a divorce.

You desire a divorce-Surprised man offered with Summons

Be secure.

When there's a threat your companion could end up being literally violent, make certain the discussion remains in a public area. And, ensure you have actually got someone else with you damaging the news.

Bring a pre-programmed cellphone to call "911" pressing a switch. When you're alone with your partner, see to it you know where you are and what you're doing.

Prepare to stay with someone else for a minimum of a couple of days. Going house when he/ she is distressed and might transform aggressive is dangerous.

Being simple.

Broach just how you would certainly really feel if anyone provided you trouble. Seek not to obscure why you desire separation when you're in the center of somebody else's dispute.

Strategy when and also exactly how to inform your companion you want divorce. Choose a location to get some anonymity.

Ask your companion straight. Ought to not take the coward's escape as well as either send an email or message or, even worse still, actually vanish without telling your spouse something.

Be Fair and Kind

Be transparent. Beating around the bush about obtaining a separation won't make the talk any kind of much easier, nor does it make the news much less frustrating.

Stop blaming your partner for glitch with your household. Take obligation for your decision, frame your discussion on the demand to move on and your feelings.

Withstand need to beat your companion, or use this discussion to mention all the ways he/ she has harmed you in the past. You do not require to show off any kind of brand-new connection details in your partner's face.

Be Frank.

Do not route your partner. Do not give him any type of false hope. When there's no chance you'll reconcile, claim.

If you undoubtedly assume you want a divorce, then don't grant a "court split" just because it seems easier.

If you have an event, and also your companion tells you, do not exist. (Yes, I recognize this is a challenging one, specifically if you reside in a state where your infidelity will impact whether you get help or just how your residential or commercial property is separated. Yet: a) opportunities are, your partner will at some point find the fact anyhow; and b) note that, at the end of the day, you will always need to cope with yourself.) Take some time.

Do not anticipate to tell your companion you desire a separation ten mins before you (or your husband or wife) go to work. Difficult conversations take time.

You can think of divorce for months (or years!). Yet this is possibly your partner's initial understanding that separating is a true possibility. Perhaps he/ she wish to think of it!

When the talk is short due to the fact that your companion tornados in a mad huff, that's perfect. What counts is that you have the ability to offer this sort of critical talk the moment it should have.

Don't deal with.

Just because separation discussion can be complicated, that does not mean it has to finish in a battle.

Resist the temptation to intentionally inform your partner or press his/ her switches and also begin a debate. Arguing, implicating or insulting your companion can make a tough conversation 100 times worse.

When your partner intends to select a fight or addresses you angrily, don't let yourself go into the battle or respond in anger. Additionally, be prepared to call. Put your talk on hold up until you as well as your partner can return peacefully.

Do not consist of infants.

Your kids shouldn't be around while you and also your companion go over divorce. Ever. Ever before. Time. Time.

And also if among the reasons for divorce includes your youngsters, that does not imply they require to be part of any type of separation conversation.

It's the same if the kids are adults. Only since they may not be kids implies they are no more your kids. They're, and they're constantly, your youngsters. You need to keep in mind that and also be a mama. That means safeguarding your youngsters from divorce.

Plan for an Unfavorable Response.

Despite just how well you think you know your companion, you will never ever know exactly how he/ she will react to your divorce information prior to you tell him/ her you desire a divorce.

Your companion can get angry or dismayed. She or he can disagree or start vocally assaulting you. Or, he/ she might plead or endanger you not to leave. Or, your spouse can take out, say nothing.

While you can't predict your spouse's response, if you have actually prepared yourself at the very least mentally to prepare for the various means your spouse might respond, you'll be much better able to manage your spouse's response when it happens.

" Awesome" separation interactions just happen in flicks. That's because some film writer had weeks to claim best terms. Then some actors practiced those words prior to speaking them.

Although your life isn't the like Hollywood flick (although at times it might feel like a daytime drama!), discovering your way of telling your partner you want a separation beforehand will certainly aid you collaborate your ideas and communicate your message Alameda, CA divorce lawyer in a much more positive and delicate method.

Do Not Study Unnecessary Information

In divorce, as in life, there is such a thing as "excessive details." You may have been thinking about obtaining a separation for a long time. You might have exercised every detail of what you want your new life to resemble. However, when you initially inform your partner you want a divorce, you do NOT require to talk about when you desire him or her to vacate, just how you are going to divide your residential or commercial property, and also who is going to get the youngsters. (And, for paradise's purpose, DON'T give your partner a spreadsheet that information exactly how you would like to divide everything from the retirement accounts to the Tupperware!) If your partner intends to enter into those kinds of details so soon, wonderful! After that you can have those conversations. However most people are going to need time to refine the fact that they are obtaining divorced before they will have the ability to talk about what will certainly take place once the divorce is over.

Include Your Partner in Your Choice, if You Can.

Choosing to separation is intensely individual. Whether you talk to your spouse concerning your decision prior to it is set in stone, is up to you. Yet, blindsiding your partner with the information that you want a divorce is seldom a great concept. Your spouse is much more likely to react terribly if s/he had no suggestion that your marital relationship was in significant trouble. While you may assume that just a full fool might miss out on the fact that your marital relationship is a mess, do not think that your partner sees the same issues that you do. What's more, "hinting" at the problem does not assist. If you are seriously considering divorce, tell your spouse that. Of course, your partner might not think you. Or, s/he might pick to overlook you. You can't control that. However at the very least you will have tried to not to blindside our unaware partner.

Saying "I Desired a Divorce" is Never Easy Regardless of what you do, having "the separation discussion" is never ever very easy. It is uncomfortable, unpleasant, and also can potentially be full of conflict. Yet, the method you begin your separation issues. The means you inform your spouse that you desire a separation matters. If the very first time your partner learns that you desire a divorce is when she reads about it in a press release (yes, it truly occurs), you can not be amazed if your separation promptly develops into a war. Causing pain on your partner causes you discomfort, too. On the other hand, if you approach your partner with kindness, compassion, as well as sensitivity, you will have a much better possibility of making your divorce as calm as feasible.

[yogaadvise]

Finding Deeper Wisdom Through Discernment

A smart individual knows she's only ever before alone with God. Even if she doesn't believe in God, she knows, no matter where she is or what borders her, she's always interfacing with the divine, with spirit, with right stuff from which the world is made.

She is only ever alone with God.

You have actually most likely heard this saying before. You have actually most likely also felt this sensation, when you were holding a grinning child, or gazing at a sunset with individuals you like most. I felt this feeling so greatly when I sat at the enormous rock base of Christ the Redeemer in Rio de Janeiro, watching individuals from all over the globe take selfies with their phones. In that moment I knew every point around me was God in differing types, yet it's hard to keep this feeling every day. It's difficult to bear in mind that you're alone with God when you remain in the center of household drama. When your friend's partner confides that he's unfaithful and also you don't understand just what to claim. It's hard to remember you remain in the existence of God on a 10-hour economy flight as the individual behind you kicks your seat. It's hard to bear in mind you're with God when you're attempting to encourage your boss you are entitled to a raising, or managing colleagues that talk behind your back.

This process of keeping in mind is a kind of discernment.

Almost all religious customs have a training around discernment. Christians depend on something called 'scriptural discernment,' which motivates followers to be essential when examining false teachings that may drift from exactly how Christianity calls them live. The Koran has a comparable teaching, it warns followers that, 'not equivalent are things that misbehave as well as traits that are great, despite the fact that the wealth of the bad might dazzle you.' The Koran calls us to seek wisdom in our obligation as well as commitment to Allah. Christianity tells us to work out perception in the lack of judgment, and when confronted with incorrect teachings consult our Holy bibles. Discernment also shows up in 12-step programs. It could be seen in the Calmness Petition which states: God provide me the calmness to accept the important things I can not change, the guts to alter the important things I can, and the knowledge to recognize the difference. This 'wisdom to understand the difference' is discernment. This is an earnest cry for the need to see things clearly. This is our plea for aid with discerning reality from falsehood.

When we are able to see the truth of all points as divine, the means ahead comes to be obvious. It is an all-natural adverse effects of realizing we are just ever alone with God. The spiritual educator Ram Dass once composed, 'When you know just how to listen, everybody is the expert.' Discernment is understanding the best ways to pay attention. It's not an intellectual exercise through which we choose to abstain or delight, discernment is a deep recognition that we're all made from the very same stuff-we're all the exact same individual hanging around in different rooms. When we acknowledge that we're all constructed out of similarity, discernment ends up being acquired behavior. All courses stand. We must just progress in our individual truth.

How can we be critical in community with others, whose facts show up various from ours? Well, when everybody you satisfy is a divine being, you trust they'll make their own options, and also the have to exert your will comes to be unneeded. When every person you meet is a deity, conflicts between 2 people end up being dharma mentors to aid us grow. When everybody you meet is a deity, then you can let go-knowing that your help might serve, yet you aren't actually required. You could effectively take a breath a sigh of alleviation. Yes, defend justice, yet when every person is a deity, you work towards adjustment, however remain crazy. You'll never ever see on your own as separate from the issues you seek to resolve.

There's a Buddhist verse that checks out discernment in Chapter 20 of the Dhammapada:

When you see with discernment, 'All phenomena are not-self' - you expand disenchanted with stress. This is the path to purity.

I do not know where pureness is. I can not tell you exactly what that looks like, and, quite truthfully, aren't sure if I'll ever before reach a purified state of presence, but here's just what I do know: Discernment is not an activity, it is a viewpoint. From this point of view the points that could have drew us off of our true happiness as well as joy-things like envy, anger, pity, shame, and pettiness-lose their charm. We don't have to rage against them. Rather, we become disenchanted with the dramas we play out, and also a new means of being arises. We outgrow our very own dependency to turmoil, and accept the distinctions and also mayhem that swirls around us. When we see that 'all sensations are not-self,' when we follow a stance of discernment, we recognize the essence of what the wise woman already recognizes: We are only ever in communion with God.