#i needed a laugh and my sense of humor is PATHETIC i know i know

[windydrawallday]

my swindle just so happpens to have his robo pawbs out in display. oooo lockdown you wanna touch them soooo bad oooooooooo

"... I thought those were for his inbuild reader-scanner?"

(I know cybertronian technology is more advanced than an old Earth calculator and that they probably had their own numerical system but I COULDN'T RESIST THE STUPID JOKE)

[childrenofcain-if]

Jumping up and down, biting down on my pillow while I wrestle my neighbor that came to complain about the noise that I'm making while running on my walls. EHEM I meant patiently waiting for the release date :batting eyelashes innocently:. Though I'm curious, how would the ROs react to an MC that's overly flirtratious but in a wet girl/boy/person loser kind of way + uses too many pick up lines/finger guns as a genuine way to flirt when nervous. Loving the premise for your if till now, it's been awhile I've loved all the ROs!!!

aw bonnie, i do hope your neighbour isn’t trying to write you a noise complaint now 💀 i need you to stay out of prison for the release date 🙏🏻

C LACROIX

you stood in front of them, wearing that ridiculous grin, eyes bright with a kind of nervous mischief that C had come to recognize too well. it was the prelude to something. and sure enough, it came—finger guns, of all things, pointed directly at them.

“are you french? ‘cause eiffel for you,” you said, your voice wavering slightly, betraying the nervous energy they were trying so hard to mask with charm. you knew damn well C was indeed french, and then the worst part—those finger guns again, paired with a wink that was so exaggerated it made their chest tighten in something like exasperated fondness.

C stared, a muscle in their jaw ticking. it should’ve been infuriating. was infuriating. the way you seemed to lose all sense of dignity the moment you felt nervous, drowning in a sea of bad pick-up lines and gestures better suited for a caricature than a real person. but god, the way your lips curved up at the end of each line, the way you stumbled through your awkward attempts, as if trying to flirt was some kind of dangerous game— it was impossible to look away.

“really?” C raised an eyebrow, trying and failing to hide the faint amusement threading through their voice. “that’s what you’re going with?”

you blinked, clearly flustered, but doubled down. “you know… if you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber.”

C ran a hand down their face, trying to stifle the laugh threatening to break free. “you’re terrible at this.”

“yeah, well,” MC shrugged, attempting to play it cool but visibly unraveling under C’s gaze, “i’m not trying to impress you, or anything.”

“really?” C stepped closer, and the temperature of the room seemed to shift. their pale green eyes flickered, sharp and predatory, and your breath hitched, the sudden proximity taking away any semblance of ease. “because you’re trying very hard not to look like you’re about to pass out.”

your mouth opened, then shut again, your bravado failing you for a split second. your hand wavered in the air as if debating whether to throw out another absurd gesture, but you were frozen in place under C’s intense stare.

C tilted their head, voice dropping into something darker, more amused. “do you actually think those awful lines are working?”

you swallowed hard. “well, you haven’t walked away yet.”

there it was—the loser charm, the half-baked attempt at deflection, the way you always seemed to bumble your way through these moments, as if too much self-awareness would be your undoing. and somehow, it was disarming. endearing, even. like a puzzle C couldn’t quite solve but found themself fascinated by all the same.

C stared at you for a moment, then blinked, a slow, deliberate thing. their lips quirked up, barely—a ghost of a smile. “you’re... utterly pathetic.”

your lips twitched, trying for a smile but faltering. “and yet… you’re still here.”

C’s gaze softened in a way they couldn’t control, something worryingly close to affection flickering behind their eyes. “i don’t know whether to kiss you or strangle you.”

“hopefully the first one?” your voice cracked just slightly, your attempt at humor failing as C’s hand came up to gently brush a thumb across your cheek.

“god, you’re hopeless,” C murmured, their voice barely a breath between you now.

your eyes fluttered shut, as if waiting for C to close the distance, to turn this fumbling, awkward mess into something real. but C stayed where they were, hovering just inches away, savoring the tension.

“i’m trying, you know,” you whispered, their voice softer now, less ridiculous, more honest. “i just—when i’m around you, i don’t know what to do. it’s like… my brain stops working.”

C smiled—a rare, genuine thing that made the dimples on their cheeks prominent. it had your heart skipping a beat. “maybe stop using finger guns next time.”

you let out a shuddering laugh. “yeah, i’ll… work on that.”

C tilted their head slightly, eyes tracing the curve of your lips. “you’re lucky i like you.”

you swallowed hard. “you do?”

C finally, finally closed the distance, pressing their lips to yours in a way that was both gentle and consuming, their hand curling around the back of your neck to pull you closer. when they pulled back, just barely, their voice was a low murmur against your mouth.

“yeah,” C whispered. “i do.”

V NÆSHOLM

V stood there, their gaze flicking nervously between the floor and your face, the faintest blush painting their cheeks. they were always like this—soft-spoken, devout, painfully kind in ways that made you feel like a storm in comparison. and today was no exception. they watched with wide, uncertain eyes as you nervously lifted your hands, finger guns aimed directly at them.

“are you religious?” you asked, your voice pitched higher than usual, betraying the nerves. “because you’re the answer to all my prayers.”

it was ridiculous, really. childish and awkward, with a smile so forced that it threatened to shatter into laughter at any moment. you knew it. you could feel how stupid it all sounded. but when you got nervous, this was the only way you knew how to act—filling the air with jokes, pick-up lines that clung too hard to the air between you and V, desperate for something solid to land on.

V blinked, their brow furrowing slightly like they weren’t sure how to respond. their fingers went instinctively to the small cross around their neck, clutching it like a lifeline, as if the gesture would tell them if you were losing your marbles. “um... thank you?”

your grin wavered, and you swallowed hard. another one, then. you had to try another one.

“are you a magician, then? because when i look at you, everything else just disappears.” you accompany that with a ‘poof’ motion to add more flair.

V’s breath caught in their throat, an embarrassed flush creeping up their neck, the kind of warmth that had no business being there. they blinked, staring at you like they were trying to make sense of a particularly difficult verse, something too foreign to easily translate. it wasn’t that they were hating it—no, it was something else entirely. something in them unfurled, but they couldn’t quite catch it, couldn’t grasp why.

you were fidgeting now, sensing the silence had stretched too long. “uh… not good? i’ve got more.”

V’s mouth twitched, something between a laugh and a sigh escaping them, though they quickly pressed their lips together. they didn’t want to be rude, didn’t want to laugh at you but how did they even respond to that?

“i—” they hesitated, voice quiet and soft as always. “i’m not sure that’s…”

you shot them another look, and there it was again: the finger guns. “is your name google? because you’ve got everything i’ve been searching for.”

yep, that’ll do it. V felt the warmth turn into something dangerously close to laughter, but they caught themself, biting down on the inside of their cheek. they didn’t want to encourage it, didn’t want to make you feel worse, but you were so earnest, so terribly bad at this, and yet so... you.

“i—” V tried again, cheeks flushed deeper now, eyes darting away because they couldn’t look directly at you without the nervousness creeping up their spine. “i think you’re—” they paused, unsure of the right words. kind? ridiculous? wonderful? none of it seemed right, and all of it seemed too much.

you were looking at them, a little too intently now, waiting for some kind of sign, some approval or rejection. you were always looking for something, even in your silliness, and V could feel that weight.

“does it ever work?” V’s voice was smaller now, their eyes dropping to the ground. “you know, those… lines?”

your face lit up with a kind of hope that tugged at V’s chest. “oh, absolutely not. not even once.”

you said it so sincerely, so shamelessly, that V couldn’t help but laugh then, a quiet, breathy sound that made them immediately cover their mouth, as if they’d broken some unwritten rule.

they shook their head, a smile creeping through their repressed amusement. “i don’t know what to do with you.”

you shrugged, clearly a little embarrassed now but still holding onto that grin. “i’m trying. just, you know—” you vaguely do the motions of jazz hands, and V swore they could feel their heart jump while stifling a fit of giggles. “i get nervous, and then… this happens.”

“i think it’s sweet,” V said after a while, more sure of themself this time. “you don’t have to be perfect all the time. not with me.”

you let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding, and your grin softened, became something more honest. “you think i’m sweet?”

V’s eyes flickered up to meet yours, the blush still warming their cheeks, but this time they didn’t look away. “yeah, i do.”

you stared at them for a long moment, feeling that nervous energy dissolve, replaced by something far more terrifying—a deep, aching tenderness you didn’t quite know how to express. you wanted to reach out, to touch V’s hand, to offer something real instead of your usual barrage of corny jokes. but all you could manage was a quiet, “you’re not so bad yourself.”

V bursts out laughing again, and this time, you laughed with them.

W OSTENDORF

W’s eyes, usually half-lidded with perpetual exhaustion, blinked in bewilderment as you approached them with an awkward bounce in your step. their sapphire gaze traced the way your fingers wavered, the unmistakable flourish of finger guns punctuating each hesitant attempt at flirtation.

“do you believe in love at first sight, or should i walk by again?” you asked, biting back the urge to laugh at yourself.

you watched as W blinked once, then twice, a momentary pause in their steady demeanor. they tilted their head slightly, considering you as if trying to figure out if you were serious. you were, in that embarrassing, frantic way only you could be.

the pick-up line hung in the air like an ill-fitting coat, and W’s mouth twitched, unsure whether to laugh or sigh. the line was delivered with a clumsy earnestness that made W’s heart ache, a mix of tenderness and exhaustion at the forefront of their expression. they rubbed a hand over their tired eyes, as if to clear away the fog of confusion that clung to them.

“um, no,” W said softly, their voice nearly a murmur. “i don’t think that’d be necessary.”

your smile wavered, a shaky thing like a candle in a draft. you laughed, a sound that was too loud, too eager. “well, that’s okay. i guess it already worked the first time, right?”

W swallowed hard, their gaze falling to the ground. if only you knew. but no matter, they thought about playing up the ‘exhausted and sleepy’ part so you won’t mind their silence to that question.

before they could say anything, however, you piped up again. “if i could rearrange the alphabet, i’d put U and I together.”

this time, W face started going red. they opened their mouth, closed it, and then opened it again, clearly unsure whether they should laugh or feel embarrassed on your behalf at this point. they had the air of someone caught in a sudden rainstorm, unprepared for the onslaught, trying to find cover but too polite to complain about getting wet.

your heart stuttered in your chest, unsure if you were supposed to be pleased by the way W’s lips trembled in the smallest of smiles or if you should simply bury yourself in shame at the way they’re turning red like they’re holding in a laugh.

W’s gaze dropped again, their thumbs rubbing nervously over each other. they smiled through their tiredness, but it was shy, careful, like they were afraid it might be taken the wrong way. “that’d be nice. you’re nice.”

and there it was—the words that always unraveled you the most. that delicate kindness, that indulgent air in W that made all of your jokes feel so hollow in comparison. you didn’t deserve someone like them, not with your clumsy attempts at flirting, not with the way you turned every silence into some absurd joke that made all the involved parties uncomfortably awkward.

you cleared your throat, but your voice cracked as you spoke again. “do you… do you have a map? because i keep getting lost in your eyes.”

a pause. W bit their lip, their face now a full shade of ripe tomatoes, and they let out the faintest sound—a stifled laugh, maybe, or something close to it. “i don’t… have a map.”

your heart skipped a beat. it was working! or maybe it wasn’t, but W wasn’t running away. they were standing there, red-faced with the dark circles under their eyes, and you realized that for all your blundering, W wasn’t retreating. they stayed, almost frozen in place, a slightly amused flutter in their gaze but no sign of discomfort. maybe it wasn’t such a ridiculous plan after all.

“elmo?” you asked, your voice quieter now, soft in the way you knew W preferred. “you’re not… mad at me, are you? for being like this?”

W looked startled by the sudden change in tone, their demeanor turning protective. “mad? no, never. why would i be mad?”

“because i’m such a loser around you. i always have been.” your hands twitched, the shadow of finger guns hanging awkwardly in the air between you. “i thought you’d have gotten tired of me by now.”

W’s heart softened, the edges of their amusement fading in the presence of your vulnerability. “i’ve never ever thought or felt like that. if i’m being honest, i think i even prefer this side of you at times.”

you blinked, something anxious flickering in your eyes. “really? i wouldn’t have guessed you’d have a thing for corny losers like me.”

W’s gaze softened even more, and before they knew it, they had reached out, their fingers gently brushing against your wrist, a tentative connection.

“i like you,” they murmured, their voice soft and barely more than a whisper. “cheesy pick-up lines and all.”

your breath caught, and for once, you didn’t have a quick response. instead, you stared at W with wide eyes, something genuine and quiet passing between you in the absence of words.

“you don’t have to do anything,” they whispered, “except stay.”

D DIACONU

D watched you with that signature half-lidded stormy gray gaze, the one that always felt like it held a secret; as though they were privy to something no one else was. their arms are crossed loosely over their chest, a lazy smirk tugging at the corner of their mouth.

you, meanwhile, were fumbling. your usual bravery melted into something far less cool, your hands twitching in an exaggerated motion—finger guns, of all things. D almost laughed then but swallowed it down, amused at the absurdity of it. this wasn’t their first time witnessing you stumble over your own feet, and it wouldn’t be the last, but there was something undeniably endearing about it, like watching a bird try to fly while forgetting it doesn’t have wings.

“are you from tennessee?” you asked, your voice catching in the back of your throat. you shot the finger guns again, and D had to suppress an eye-roll at the cheesiness of it all. “because you’re the only ten i see.”

D didn’t react immediately. instead, they watched you with careful precision, letting the silence hang just long enough to feel like a challenge.

“i’m from texas actually,” D’s voice was a low southern drawl, honeyed with amusement. “common mistake, eh?”

you shifted nervously under their gaze, all the awkwardness evident in your stance.

“yeah, i know. i just... thought it was cute,” you answered, almost defensively, your hands still hanging in midair, unsure what to do now that the moment was spiraling out of your control.

a quiet laugh slipped from D’s lips, smooth as silk, barely more than a breath. they uncrossed their arms and stepped forward, closing the distance between you in a way that felt deliberate, dangerous.

“you think this is how you get my attention?” their voice was low, teasing, but there was a flicker of something that hinted at just how carefully D was watching your every move. “cute little lines and finger guns?”

you flushed under the intensity of that stare, scrambling to regain control of the situation. “well, i— yeah, i thought maybe... it would work?” you winced at your own words. god, could this get any worse?

D leaned in just close enough to make your pulse race. “you think i go for cute?” the words were laced with a challenge, a dare for you to keep going, to push past your limits.

you swallowed, every instinct telling you to back down, but instead, you doubled down on the only defense you knew.

“you remind me of a dictionary,” you grinned, forcing out another pick-up line, desperate to keep from crumbling under D’s pinning stare, “because you really do add meaning to my life.”

this time, D did laugh—a rich, joyful sound that seemed to unravel the tension between you in one graceful swoop. they pulled back just enough to catch your eye, shaking their head in disbelief. “you really don’t know when to quit, do you?”

your face burned with embarrassment, but there was a flicker of something softer beneath all the practiced allure and playful flirtations. they weren’t mocking you, not really. in fact, there was a hint of appreciation buried in their amusement, a quiet acknowledgment that you, as ridiculous as you were, had managed to catch their attention in a way nobody else could.

D’s fingers brushed lightly against your wrist, the touch fleeting but electric. “you’re lucky i find this... entertaining. otherwise, you’d be in way over your head.”

you blinked, thrown by the sudden shift in energy. you opened your mouth to respond, but D’s hand was already moving, their fingers ghosting up your arm in a way that left you breathless, speechless.

“i think,” D continued, their voice almost a whisper now, “i like watching you try. you’re terrible at it, no doubt about that, but... there’s something about the way you stumble through it.” their eyes locked onto yours, something unreadable flickering in the depths of their gaze. “i’ve never met someone like you. that much, i can admit.”

you felt your heart skip a beat, your words catching in your throat. all the cheesy pick-up lines, the awkward flirting—none of it seemed to matter anymore, not under the affection in D’s gaze, not when they were standing so close that it felt like the world had shrunk down to just the two of you.

“maybe i’m just a uniquely jumbled mess,” you muttered, your voice barely audible, but D’s hand slid up to cup your cheek, pulling you closer with a softness that was almost unnerving.

“you definitely are, dragă mea,” D agreed, their lips ghosting over yours, so close that it felt like a kiss, but not quite. “but it’s one of the little things i like about you.”

and with that, they kissed you, slow and deliberate, like they’d been waiting for this moment longer than they’d ever let on. you melted into them, every nerve alight, the awkwardness and self-doubt slipping away in the warmth of D’s touch. this, right here, was what you’d been gunning for all along.

M WHITLOCK-SINGH

M had never known someone quite like you. there was something so bafflingly endearing about you, as if you existed to disrupt V’s neatly ordered world with your awkward charm and unbearable nervousness. it wasn’t that you meant to do so, but the way you flirted—if you could even call it that—made M’s head spin despite their usual stoicism.

they could see it coming a mile away, the way your eyes darted from the floor to M’s face and back again, like you were gathering the courage to throw yourself off a cliff. and then it happened.

your finger guns shot up, aimed clumsily at a literal heir to the british throne. “well, here i am. what were your other two wishes?”

M blinked, incredulity washing over them. seriously? again?

there was a moment of silence that hung heavy in the air, before you, still flustered, tried again. “if you were a fruit, you’d be a fine-apple.”

M sighed, pressing the heels of their palms to their eyes. it was like being trapped in a bad dream, except it wasn’t bad, not really. it was you, standing there, losing your composure in a way that made you seem so painfully human. so vulnerable.

“you’ve got to be kidding me.” M’s voice was low, restrained, an edge of amusement barely detectable. they crossed their arms, leveling you with a look that was part disbelief, part... something else. “is this really your idea of flirting?”

you winced, but it was clear you were trying to save face. “what, do they not like compliments in england?”

“compliments?” M’s laugh was sharp, but not exactly mocking. “you’re telling me those were compliments?”

“okay, maybe not my best,” you admitted, rubbing the back of your neck, your voice dropping into something that sounded closer to sincerity. “but… i mean, you’re kind of distracting, your majesty. you can’t really blame me.”

W narrowed their eyes to hide their barely suppressed delight, studying the way you fidgeted, the way your hands couldn’t seem to stay still. it was always like this—you trying so hard to be smooth, to make M smile with these ridiculous pick-up lines that felt like they belonged in a teen rom-com from the 90s and early 2000s.

“distracting?” M repeated, taking a step closer, watching as your breath stuttered. “how so?”

you swallowed, eyes wide, trying to keep it together. “like… you know… hard to think straight.”

a beat passed, and then M did something unexpected—they laughed. a soft, surprised sound that felt different from their usually polite, regal chuckle. and yet, it somehow sounded better. you blinked, as if unsure whether to be relieved or even more nervous.

“before i met you, i never thought i’d see the day,” M murmured, stepping even closer, the laughter settling into a smile, “when someone would try to flirt with me using finger guns.”

you smiled back, sheepish but hopeful. “well, i aim to please you with my moves. call me twinkle-toes.”

M shook their head, but the smile that tugged at the corners of their mouth betrayed them. they didn’t want to admit it, but something about the whole thing—the terrible pick-up lines, the way you stumbled over your words, the sheer awkwardness of it—was getting to them. softening them, in a way nothing else had.

“you’re a bumbling idiot,” V said quietly, but there was no malice in it. just a strange sort of fondness.

you started to grin. “but i’m your bumbling idiot, right?”

“maybe,” M whispered, voice like a velvet secret. “but i’d suggest you not throw those words so loudly in public.”

your laugh was shaky, but real. “noted. i’ll—uh, keep that in mind, your highness.”

M smiled softly, warmth flickering in their chest despite themself. “just call me by my name, meri jaan. i’d prefer it more right now.”

[caelesjjk]

entangled | jjk&kth - teaser

⟶title: entangled

⟶au: marvel au

⟶ rating: 18+

⟶ genre: romance, smut, love triangle

⟶wc: 1.5k for this

⟶banner: by meee, and yes I’m insane and made a new one

⟶warnings: mentions of blood, kissing, a boob grab and an ass grab, but no actual smut for this, Jungkook calls you Data

⟶ summary: Jeon Jungkook is Spider-Man.

He saved your life twice. But he’s also been your sweet lab partner in college for the past two years and now someone who is more than just a friend.

You care about him…maybe even love him. But something tells you that you aren’t quite sure what love even is. How could you when you have feelings for someone else as well?

Kim Taehyung is the handsome stranger you’ve seen around campus and somehow ended up dancing with at Club Onyx. You were upset that Jungkook had stood you up once again and Taehyung made you feel like you were on top of the world.

What you didn’t know that night, is the dark secret Taehyung is trying desperately to hide, but the closer the two of you get the more difficult that becomes.

⟶ authors note: hello darklings. I know a lot of people have been waiting for this fic, and you’ll have wait just a bit more. But in the meantime, I offer this little teaser to hold you over. A little glimpse of spidey kook. First chapter will be posted in just a few weeks!

Also, if you asked to be on the taglist just now that I tried messing with it for a long ass time and got annoyed lol. I may try again for the actual fic.

“What are you doing here anyways?” You shove against his broad chest and feel his arm release your waist. He sighs, following you inside your apartment.

“I know you’re upset I missed the study session…” Jungkook starts to explain, but you twist back around to face him.

“If my friends hadn’t seen you around campus now and then, they would think I made you up, Jungkook. You never show. It makes me look pathetic.” You cross your arms over your chest and wait for the next excuse.

“You aren’t pathetic, Data. I’m just…” Jungkook winces when he reaches for you, a hand moving down to his ribs in pain. “Sorry, it’s healing it’s just slow.”

“What’s healing? What happened to you?” You let the fight go for a moment, closing the space between the two of you and moving his hand out of the way.

Beneath his fingers is a large cut, bloody but half hidden by his suit. It looks angry and inflamed. What could’ve made a cut like this?

“It’s nothing. I’ll heal up in a couple hours.” He pulls your hand away, blood stained on the tips of your fingers.

“It won’t matter how quick you heal if it gets infected. Come in here.” Your hand wraps around his and you pull him into your small bathroom. You steady him against your bathroom vanity and move to grab your first aid kit from the cabinet above your toilet. “Take that off.” You gesture to his Spider-Man suit.

“Yes, ma’am.” Jungkook teases, gingerly working his top half out of the suit. He hisses through his teeth as he peels the suit away from his ribs and lets it hang at his hips.

You are not the universe's strongest soldier.

Your eyes drift over all the dips and curves of muscle. A perfectly sculpted chest and abs you could literally eat off of are scrambling every sense you have in your head. You need to focus. Stay focused on the task at hand and not his ridiculously toned body.

“You okay, Data?” He asks, humor in his voice. That horrid nickname he had given you in your first year as lab partners is feeling more endearing these days. You clear your throat.

“I’m fine. Why wouldn’t I be fine? Just tending to Spider-Man’s wounds in my extremely tiny bathroom.” You try to laugh but it doesn’t sound genuine.

You take out some bandages and gauze and get to work cleaning him up. But even as you tape down the gauze, you can visibly see the wound getting smaller. Super powers were really something else.

“Data.” Jungkook’s voice brings you back to reality.

“What?” You sigh.

“Please come here.” His hands reach for your hips and you give in, letting him pull you until you’re flush against him, suddenly nose to nose. “That’s better.”

“I’m angry with you.” You whisper, heart pumping a bit faster in the close proximity.

“I know that you are. I’m really sorry…I swear I wanted to be there.” You look down to see him slip his gloves off his hands and sit them on the countertop before they’re coming up to cup your face.

“Then what happened? You need to tell me.” Your hands wrap around his wrists.

“There’s something out there, Data. A…monster that we can’t figure out. He’s strong…and fast. Nothing I’ve ever seen before.” His thumbs brush the corners of your mouth.

“What does it want?”

“It keeps breaking into the Lab across the River. It’s looking for something. But no one at the lab is being very forthcoming with information.” His forehead presses to yours, “but Mr. Kim is working on that part.”

Seokjin Kim, also known as Ironman. He was a mentor and a good friend to Jungkook. He had helped Jungkook navigate the new world of being a superhero and also gave him a job to help him pay for school.

“Hasn’t Mr. Kim told you to call him Jin over and over?” You tease, hands coming up to rest against his chest. Jungkook laughs quietly, pulling you closer.

“He has. Guess it just slipped out.” His hands move down to palm your ass.

“What exactly do you think you’re doing?” You raise an eyebrow in question of his actions.

“Just feels like I haven’t touched you in so long.” His warm mouth finds your throat and he presses kisses to the skin.

“Two days is a long time?”

“It is when it comes to you. Thinking about how much I want you gets so distracting.” He nuzzles into the crook of your neck making you giggle.

“So what I did for you two days ago wasn’t enough?” You let your hands slither down from his chest and over the planes of his stomach.

“Never enough.” His nose skims over your jaw until you’re back face to face and his lips are devouring yours. “I’d like to pay you back.”

“How?” You moan when you’re cut off by his tongue sliding into your mouth.

“Let me show you?” Jungkook pulls away from the kiss, taking your hand and leading you out of the bathroom.

Thinking he means to lead you to your bed, you start to pull him towards it but he seems to have other ideas, walking you back out onto the balcony. He releases your hand momentarily to slide his suit back up over his shoulders.

“What are you going to show me out here, Jungkook?” You start to feel suspicious.

“Do you trust me?” He jumps up onto your railing with ease, still holding your hand in his.

“Not if it involves you swinging me around off the side of buildings.” You start to pull your hand out of his, but his web shooter from the other wrist shoots a web at your torso, using his inhuman strength to pull you up onto the railing into his arms.

“I would never let you fall. Never. Just close your eyes for a few minutes. I promise it’ll be worth it, Data.” He touches your cheek gently, and even though you want to throw up every time he does this, you close your eyes and wrap your arms as tightly as possible around his neck and legs around his waist. “Ready?” He whispers in your ear, one strong arm wrapping around your back.

You don’t verbally answer, just nod once before burying your face into his neck.

And then the ground is no longer beneath your feet and the sickening feeling of free falling is very apparent. You try to breathe, squeezing yourself around Jungkook as you listen to the whooshing sound of his web shooters discharge and swing you between the tallest buildings in the city.

“You’re doing amazing.” Jungkook kisses your cheek, “just another minute.”

You keep your eyes squeezed shut until the curiosity becomes too overwhelming, making you dare to open your eyes just the slightest bit. You see the sun completely setting on the horizon, orange and purple hues slowly disappearing beneath the river. As long as you don’t think about how high up you are, it really is beautiful up here.

Jungkook shoots a web straight up into the air, letting it connect to the side of one of the tallest buildings, slowly pulling the two of you up until he’s reached the highest ledge, tapping your thighs so you know it’s safe to put your feet down.

“Why are we up here, Jungkook? You know the heights..” he kisses you before you can finish the sentence.

“Can we try something?” He smiles, and it’s infuriating. You’re too weak for this spidey boy. You sigh with exasperation.

“I’m already very wary of saying yes.” You look away from the ledge towards the top of the building.

“Let me make you feel good…up here.” His cheeks heat a little when he asks.

“Is this some kind of weird adrenaline thing? Why would you want that?” Your voice cracks and you sputter, disbelief heavy in your tone.

“I think it’ll be intense…feel so good.” His lips move down and his teeth nip at your jaw.

“It’s insane…” you melt into his touch and the way his mouth sucks at your neck.

“If you don’t like it, I’ll take you home. And I’ll get you naked in your bed instead.” He pulls your shirt over your head, fully knowing you’re about to give in.

“Bed sounds so good right now…”

“Please, Data…just try it.” He tosses your shirt to the side, cupping your breasts and kissing the tops of them.

“What do I have to do?” You feel too good to let the fear ruin the way he’s making you feel.

“Lie back on the ledge, with your arms above your head and your wrists crossed.”

You let him lead you down onto the ledge, every nerve in your body is hot and on the edge. Jungkook makes sure that you’re settled before he stands back up straight, looking down at you while you slowly move your arms above your head the way he asked.

“You’re perfect, Data.” Jungkook stares at you a moment longer before he aims his web shooter and traps your wrists together against the concrete ledge beneath you.

[onlinesuzie]

☆ “you’re delusional, you’re like actually crazy” pt. 2 ☆

words: 1.5k

summary: Hamzah publicly mocks you on his most recent podcast episode, after confronting him, you are once again drawn back in by his manipulative affection but this time his words and actions are different.

notes: i’m literally addicted to this idea of hamzah i can’t stop writing!! thank you for all the submissions guys i love writing them!!

♡

You’re mindlessly scrolling through social media, trying to distract yourself from the gnawing feeling that something is off. It's been a quiet day, too quiet, and the silence from Hamzah has left you with a growing sense of unease. Just as you're about to close the app, a clip from Hamzah’s latest podcast episode pops up on your feed, shared by someone you follow.

Out of habit, you click on it, expecting the usual mix of humor and laid-back conversation that he’s known for. But as the video plays, your heart sinks.

“…and there’s this one girl,” Hamzah’s voice is smooth, almost casual, but there’s a sharpness to it that makes your stomach twist. “She was so crazy, man. Always checking up on me, obsessing over everything I did. It was like she couldn’t breathe unless she knew what I was doing every second of the day, and I’m like ‘oh my god, you’re delusional, you’re like actually crazy’”

The audience laughs in the chat, Hamzah still chuckling along to his own words, the sound grating in your ears. He continues, the words pouring out like venom, each one cutting deeper. “It was pathetic, really. I mean, who needs that kind of shit? Always making everything about her, so desperate for attention. It was exhausting.”

You stare at the screen, frozen in place. He doesn’t say your name, but the description is unmistakable. It’s you he’s talking about. He’s mocking you in front of thousands of listeners, turning your pain into a joke for entertainment. The humiliation burns through you like acid, your chest tightening as you try to process the betrayal.

How could he do this? The thought echoes in your mind as you replay the clip, hoping—praying—that you misheard, that it isn’t as bad as it seems. But each time, the words hit just as hard, confirming what you already know deep down.

It’s about you.

That evening, you find yourself outside Hamzah’s apartment, the anger and hurt building with every step. You shouldn’t be here. You should be walking away, cutting ties with him for good. But the pull is too strong, the need for answers too overwhelming to ignore.

You take a deep breath and knock on the door, your heart pounding in your chest. A few moments later, the door swings open, and there he is, standing in the doorway with that familiar half-smile that always makes your resolve falter.

“Hey,” he says casually, as if nothing’s wrong. “What’s up?”

“What’s up?” you echo, incredulous. You can’t believe he’s acting like everything is normal. “What the hell, Hamzah? I saw your podcast.”

His expression doesn’t change, but there’s a flicker of something in his eyes—annoyance, maybe? He steps aside, letting you in without a word. You walk into the apartment, the tension between you crackling like static electricity.

Once the door is closed, you round on him, unable to hold back any longer. “How could you say those things? You were talking about me, weren’t you?”

Hamzah leans against the wall, crossing his arms over his chest. He looks at you with a mixture of boredom and impatience, like you’re a child throwing a tantrum. “You’re seriously mad about that?” he asks, his tone dripping with condescension. “It wasn’t even about you. You’re overreacting.”

Your jaw drops. “Overreacting? Hamzah, you described me exactly! How can you stand there and pretend it wasn’t about me?”

He sighs, as if you’re exhausting him just by being here. “Not everything is about you, you know. It was just a story. You’re being paranoid.”

“Paranoid?” The word struck a nerve. “You made me sound like some kind of obsessive psycho! And you did it in front of all your listeners. How am I supposed to feel?”

“Maybe if you didn’t act so crazy, you wouldn’t think it was about you,” he snaps back, his voice growing colder. “But of course, you have to make this a big deal. It’s always the same with you—blowing everything out of proportion.”

The anger that had been simmering inside you starts to boil over. “I’m not blowing this out of proportion, Hamzah! You humiliated me in front of everyone, and now you’re trying to gaslight me into thinking I’m the problem?”

He raises an eyebrow, his expression darkening. “Gaslighting? Really? God, you sound so dramatic. I didn’t do anything to you. If you’re feeling hurt, that’s on you, not me.”

Your vision blurs with tears of frustration. “You always do this. You twist things around, make me doubt myself. You make me feel like I’m the one who’s crazy when it’s you who’s hurting me!”

He pushes off the wall and steps closer, his presence suddenly overwhelming. “You’re making yourself crazy, always overthinking everything. I can’t even make a joke without you blowing it out of proportion. Maybe if you weren’t so obsessed with me, you wouldn’t be so hurt all the time.”

The words sting like a whip, each one carefully aimed to cut you down. But underneath the cruelty, there’s a flicker of something else—something that makes you hesitate. Is he right? Are you overreacting? Is this all in your head?

You try to stand up for yourself, refusing to let him get away with it this time. “I could tell everyone what you really say to me. How you really treat me. Let them see who you are, you fucking asshole.”

For a moment, Hamzah’s expression shifts to something more serious, almost dangerous. Then he laughs, a cold, unamused sound. “Go ahead,” he says, but there’s a note of challenge in his voice. “They’ll just think you’re crazy. You think anyone would believe you over me?”

The words hit like a punch, but before you can respond, his tone shifts again, softer, more calculated. He reaches out, brushing your hair back from your face, his voice dropping to a whisper. “But why would you want to do that? I care about you. You know that, right? I love you sweetheart”

You freeze, your breath catching in your throat. He loves you? He’s never said that before. The word hangs between you, filling the space with something heavy and confusing. You want to believe him so badly, want to believe that this is real, that he really does love you and that it’s not just another manipulation.

“Do you really mean that?” you ask, your voice trembling with hope and doubt.

His gaze locks onto yours, intense and unreadable. “Of course I do, my love. I wouldn’t say it if I didn’t mean it.”

And just like that, the fight drains out of you. You feel yourself softening under his gaze, the anger and hurt melting away as you let yourself believe him, even if every rational part of you is screaming that this is just another way to control you.

Before you can think it through, he pulls you into a kiss, his lips pressing against yours with a possessiveness that leaves no room for argument. It’s a kiss that demands your compliance, that tells you without words that this is how things are going to be.

You kiss him back, the desperate hope that he means it overpowering everything else. The world narrows down to just the two of you, the familiar heat flaring between you, erasing the lines between right and wrong, pain and pleasure.

Hamzah’s hands are on you, pulling you closer, his touch rougher than before, as if to remind you of who’s in control. And you let him, because it’s easier to give in than to fight. Easier to lose yourself in the physical connection than to face the reality of what’s happening.

He guides you to the bed, the tension between you shifting from anger to something more primal. As your body responds to his, you feel a strange mix of relief and shame when he whispers in your ear, "Good." The words send a shiver down your spine, both comforting and unsettling, reinforcing the power he holds over you.

The arguments, the hurtful words, the public humiliation-they all fade into the background as your bodies come together, as you let him take what he wants from you, hoping that maybe this time, it'll be enough to keep him.

Afterward, Hamzah lies behind you, his arm draped possessively over your waist. You feel his breath warm against the back of your neck as he cuddles into you, pulling you closer. His lips find your hair, pressing soft kisses into it, as if to soothe the pain he's caused. "You're so beautiful," he murmurs against your hair, the words both soothing and confusing. Then, with a soft, almost vulnerable tone, he adds, "I love you." The tenderness in his actions and words contrasts sharply with the cruelty he's shown, leaving your emotions even more tangled.

But deep down, you know it won't be enough. The cycle will continue, the pain and the passion intertwined, feeding off each other in a toxic dance that neither of you can escape.

And as you lie there in the dark, Hamzah's arm tightening around you, you wonder how much longer you can keep doing this. How much more of yourself you can give away before there's nothing left.

But for now, you close your eyes and let yourself be consumed by him, by the illusion that this is love with hamzah, even if it's killing you.

[huramuna]

wine red, tears gold - chapter 4.

king aegon II x baratheon ofc

previous chapter | next

a 'what if aegon didn't get poisoned and the greens technically won the dance but at what cost' au. basically aegon, alicent, otto and jaehaera are the only greens alive. and larys i guess. someone get rid of this guy.

word count: 3.5k

please follow & turn on notifs for @huramuna-fics for my fic postings

content: smut (specifics below cut), canon typical misogyny, canon typical violence, angst, fluff, arranged marriage, touch-staved aegon, aegon isn't a r*pist in this au but he is still a bad person and has his vices, ofc and aegon need to go to therapy together, justice for jaehaera, awkward sex, kind of a slow burn, infidelity

this comes from the inside - the living tombstone • oblivion - grimes

warnings: p in v, creampie

Being close with another person can be such a precarious thing. Not just in emotional closeness, but physical as well. 

Lyanna never much liked being touched, not even as a child. She would shy away from courtiers pinching her cheeks, from her mother’s outstretched arms, from her father’s heavy hand upon her shoulder. Being touched felt like a burden of sorts, as if someone expected reciprocity from putting their hands on another. 

She never wished to give it in return. 

Since moving to the Red Keep, she has changed— in more ways than one, of course. She quite liked being touched now by her good mother, Alicent’s touches were soft and warm. Mayhaps it was because the queen mother was there to hold Lyanna at her lowest, and she found some comfort in her arms that she never derived from her own mother. 

Then there was Aegon. His touches were… confusing. He seemed much at war with himself, like a stray dog wishing for affection, a scratch on the cheek or pat of the head, but didn’t know how to ask, how to convey he wanted it. His proposal to Lyanna of exchange of pleasure for nurture was a strange one, to be sure. 

It must’ve been the wine, that would be why she had said yes, wouldn’t it? 

Certainly not the fact that her husband seemed… jealous. Jealous of a Dornish prince putting his hands on her and making her laugh. Aegon, being the same one who had said she wasn’t a beauty that men go to war for. Aegon, who couldn’t even flow in the same atmosphere as Lyanna for weeks. Aegon, who fucked a whore the morning after their wedding and many days besides. 

That Aegon— was jealous? 

The notion of it seemed humorous to Lyanna, as if she held some great power over him, reducing him to his knees before her. 

All for a touch. 

In truth, it was more than just a touch. He had fallen asleep with his head in her lap, snoozing softly. Lyanna wriggled down, trying to get comfortable. As much as she detested Aegon, at least she thought she did, she didn’t want to wake him. Not when he seemed so at peace with his pathetic prize. 

He was a heavy sleeper. She managed to lay on her back comfortably and adjust his position to where he was strewn across her stomach and chest. Lyanna watched him for… who knows how long, being lulled into some sense of relaxation by his weight and warmth on her, coupled with his rhythmic breathing. He was like a living heavy blanket. 

Her fingers threaded through his hair, smoothing small circles upon his scalp absentmindedly, as she fell asleep herself. 

When she awoke, he was still there— albeit, shifted slightly. He clung to her like a second skin, his leg thrown over hers, his arms draped over her chest haphazardly, still deeply asleep. Lyanna’s breaths fanned over his hair, his head resting under her chin. Whatever spell she had been under the night before had (almost) worn off, the novelty faded. 

Gently, more gentle than he truly deserved, she roused him. “Aegon,” she murmured, “Aegon, it's morning— I must get ready soon.” 

“Morning…” he hummed drowsily, lips pressed to her neck unknowingly. “No… I will sleep more.” 

Lyanna rolled her eyes; it was like dealing with a child rather than a King. “Laze around if you must, husband,” she began to pry him off of her. “But I have duties to attend to.” 

“Duties can wait, wife,” he blinked, supplanting his chin upon her chest and looking up at her in a way that made her heart wrench. He looked Gods awful pathetic, like an abandoned puppy. “Stay longer, please.” 

“… I have things to see to, Aegon. I don’t wish for your mother to be cross if I’m late to break our fast together.” 

He let out a huff, rolling off of her. “May I at least stay until you leave?”

“I suppose. You can help dress me. Do you know how to dress a lady?” Lyanna asked, getting up from the bed to open her wardrobe. 

“Ehm— I know how to undress a lady.”

“My Myrish silk from last night begs to differ.”

“Well, you have too many layers, too many loops and ties. This is why whores are so much easier, they’re practically already naked.” 

Lyanna shot a glare at him. “I’d appreciate it if you didn’t remind me that you frequently lie with other ladies.” 

Aegon came up behind her, a bit taller than her by a head, poking his nose into her neck. “Why? Are you jealous?”

She scoffed. “Jealous? Jealous like you were of Prince Qyle?”

“I don’t get jealous,” he grumbled, backing away from her and folding his arms over his chest. “I just don’t think it was appropriate the way he was touching you— like you were a whore.” 

“You love that word, don’t you?” 

“Mayhaps. I quite like other words, too. Slut, cunt, bitch— the list goes on.” 

“You’re truly an ignorant, beautiful creature, Aegon. It’s a wonder to me that you survived infancy.” 

“You think I’m beautiful?” 

Lyanna let out a snorting laugh, it was undignified and unladylike— but real. Even more real than the laughs that Prince Qyle evoked from her the night before. She stayed turned away, sorting through her clothes. The noise she emitted, raucous and loud as it was, made Aegon smile for half a moment. He quite liked when his wife laughed— and he had been the one to do it this time. 

Aegon ended up not helping her dress, as he took one look at the configurations of a corset and left. 

That was fine by Lyanna, in all truths. She descended to the Queen mother’s chambers and broke her fast with her, as was her daily routine. Somehow, in the middle of their eating, their conversation turned to the topic of sex. Lyanna didn't feel much embarrassment talking about most things with Alicent, as she was a good conservationist– but sex was one of the things Alicent was… hesitant to talk about, all things considered, and Lyanna wasn’t exactly an expert. 

Poking into her soft boiled egg with her spoon, Lyanna listened intently to Alicent.

“You’re the only one I would talk to such things about, dearest,” Alicent hummed, dragging her utensil through her own bowl of coddled eggs, “I never much liked it with… the late King. ‘Twas my duty, after all. I can only hope that, ehm, Aegon makes it less painful for you.” 

“... he does fine, I suppose,” Lyanna murmured, prying the soft white of the egg from the shell and balancing it on the spoon. “... truthfully, we haven’t…” she rolled her shoulders to enunciate her meaning, “Laid together in a way conducive to making an heir– not since the wedding night.”

The queen mother perked a brow, crossing one leg over the other. “So you are doing such things in… other methods?”

“Only once– last night, in fact,” Lyanna admitted softly, poking the bite of egg into her mouth, wiping away an errant drop of yolk from her lip– to which Alicent was watching intently– “After the banquet. Was Aegon… jealous as a child?”

Alicent cracked a small smile, leaning back in her chair. “I’m not sure that he was jealous in the way that some may think. He wasn’t so much envious of what others had that he wished to covet, but rather what others were, comparatively to him. Rhaenyra was his father’s favorite, Aemond was the better swordsman, Helaena more beloved by my father– he was always the odd one out.” she blinked profusely, picking at the hem of her sleeve. “Why?”

“He… followed me to my chambers after the feast and started spewing heinous accusations about Prince Qyle and I.” 

“And this… led you both to the bed?” Alicent took a long sip of her tea, her eyes not leaving Lyanna’s. 

“No– my boudoir chair, actually.”

The queen mother’s cheeks reddened softly. “Oh my– I cannot say that’s something I experienced. Was it… pleasurable at least?” 

“It was certainly enlightening– that he may not be as useless as I thought,” Lyanna paused. “That I may not be as repulsive to him as I thought I was.” she spoke a bit quieter then, the subject still tender to her, a wound not yet fully scarred over.

“It’s his blood.” Alicent replied in a matter-of-fact tone.

“His… blood?” 

“The blood of the dragon– Targaryens have dragon’s blood in their veins, which runs thick and hot when situations become… precarious. It may be any sort of situation that might give you or I an adrenaline rush, good or bad– but for them, all my children included, it’s like igniting the spark to a wildfire. Some sort of primal, uncontainable thirst for… whatever it is that spurred them. For Aegon… he quells his blood with wine and whores,” Alicent frowned slightly at the notion, the corners of her eyes crinkling into a silent apology, “Jealousy could very well be one of the things that whipped him into a frenzy– mayhaps you should use such a thing to your advantage? Of course, I won’t condone adultery, my dear– but the illusion of interest in someone else may have Aegon more… inclined to lay with you.” 

Lyanna sniffed slightly, putting down her empty egg shell. “I wish he would just want it without me having to… set him on fire, or however it’s put.”

“Men are– for the lack of a better word– stupid, Lyanna. They are blind to the things they need the most.” 

–

Lyanna spent the rest of her week planning on how exactly to make Aegon jealous. She didn’t really understand how to put on such airs of that extent– acting confident was one thing, but feining attraction for another person was different, wasn’t it? She didn’t consider herself a massive flirt, either.

They sat in the dining hall, entertaining a visiting lord from the Reach, some Tyrell or Redwyne or other, who promptly gave Lyanna a bouquet of beautiful flowers. She was delighted at the gesture, not because she really enjoyed them, but because it would be easier to start her ruse. 

“Oh, thank you, my lord– these are gorgeous, absolutely gorgeous,” she hummed. She was wearing a green dress that, somehow, matched Aegon’s deep green tunic that eve. “How did you know that sunflowers were my favorite?” 

“Ah, your grace, the sunflower is my favorite as well,” the lord smiled heartily, chattering on and on about sunflowers. “It very much reminded me of your radiance, my queen.”

His audacious compliment earned a warm giggle from Lyanna, her face blistered with a blush– half of the blush was from real bashfulness, as she wasn’t used to receiving such compliments. She knew it was false, of course. She was more reminiscent of a plain dandelion than a sunflower.

The dinner consisted of Lyanna talking to him, making much smalltalk and overall, talking to him more than she’d talked to Aegon in their entire marriage. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see her husband practically stewing, rolling around a brussel sprout around his plate with the tip of his knife, an inhuman heat blistering off of him in waves.

Apparently, to Aegon, enough was enough– his hand slipped from his goblet of wine, drenching the front of Lyanna’s dress. “Ah– my dear, I’m so very clumsy,” he crooned, “Let’s get you cleaned up, shall we?” 

Lyanna nodded slowly as her husband looped his arms around her and led her out of the dining hall. She murmured some apologies to their guests, citing that they would return soon. Aegon led them down a corridor, not far from the hall, into a closed off enclave, where he closed the door. 

“You’re doing this on purpose,” he grumbled, spinning her around so that her back was pressed against the stone wall in the close quarters of what was basically a servant’s closet. “You’re egging me on purposefully.” 

Tilting her chin up defiantly, she spoke nonchalantly. “I have no idea what you’re speaking of, husband, truly.” 

Aegon gave an unamused expression, his mouth wrought into a thin line. “I’m not even that drunk and I could plainly see you letting that… absolute peon of a Lord come onto you.” 

“So? He fancies me and gifted me a bouquet of flowers– I don’t see anything terribly wrong with that. It isn’t unheard of to pay homage to their queen, is it?” 

His hand shot out, gripping her chin and jaw. “I don’t– You– you’re so fucking frustrating!” he growled, raising his voice. Their noses were touching from their proximity, their breaths intermingling. It was the closest they’d ever been.

Footsteps echoed from the hallway, to which the both of them froze. They came past the closet, then descended back down the corridor.

“This is scandalous.” Lyanna murmured.

“How? We are husband and wife, simply having a chat.”

“We are the king and queen of the Seven Kingdoms, not… animals– I’m sure that anyone who opened this door would see you… pinning me against a wall. I’m not sure much could be left to the imagination there, Aegon.”

“You really should get the stick out of your arse, wife.”

“Mayhaps it would do better up yours, then?”

“Careful, I may actually enjoy that.” he grinned, the expression lighting up his usually solemn face. Lyanna considered him quite handsome at that moment. 

“You’re vulgar.” she quipped back, biting down on the soft part between his thumb and forefinger gently.

A sound akin to a breathy moan came from Aegon’s mouth at her bite. “And you call me an animal? You’re fucking biting me, you cheeky minx.” 

“Yes? Well, if you are to drag me to your level– we are both animals then.” she stared at him with wide eyes and she wondered if he could feel the beat of her heart. It felt like it would abscond from her body at any moment. Her heavy chest fell and rose in weighty breaths. 

“That lord is quite wrong, you know,” Aegon whispered, his lips dangerously close to hers– they hadn’t kissed since the wedding ceremony, and even then it was a quick peck – his mouth quirked into a smug grin. “You aren’t a sunflower. You’re a sweet little rabbit. I quite like rabbit, you know. They’re delicious, succulent,” he paused, leaning forward and speaking against her lips, “Tender.”

It was unsure who closed the gap first, but their lips fused together into a ferocious kiss. They both tasted of a deep, rich wine. It was a fight of tongues and teeth, a battle where they both wished to devour one another– Lyanna’s hand tugged at his white curls, nails scraping against his scalp as he held her face in a vice-like grip, as if he was afraid she would dissipate from his clutches at any moment. His lips were soft, surprisingly, where she had expected them to be rough and chapped. His skin pressed against hers and the slight growing stubble upon his cheeks tickled her in kind, her lips perking into a smile as they kissed. 

The once silent closet became a cacophony of small sighs and gasps from both the king and queen. Aegon’s free hand trailed to the small of Lyanna’s back, resting right in the divots above her bottom, his fingers splayed out in exploratory fashion. His repose was short lived, as he grabbed the fleshy globe of her arse, emitting a pleased hum of surprise. They parted for a moment to breathe, as it was wholly necessary– if they hadn’t needed to breathe, they wouldn’t have parted at all, reveling in one another’s taste for hours.

“I forbid you to cut my dress, Aegon,” she whispered in a playful warning, staring at him with a look that couldn’t be described as anything else other than fondness. “I refuse to go through these halls with my garment sliced to shreds.”

“But you love it, don’t you? You quite liked it last night.”

“Aegon.”

“Fine,” he acquiesced, his hand retreating from her face to unbuckle his belt. The light of the closet was dim, close to none– the soft flickering of the sconces outside of the corridor bleeding in through the cracked door. She couldn’t see what he was doing, really, but she heard the soft grunts coming from him as his fist slid against his length. Giving her ass a playful squeeze, he used his other hand to ruck up her skirts, the pad of his thumb swiping down her underclothes. “Lovely.” Aegon practically purred, hooking his finger and sliding the wet garb down her legs.

The air was cold against her bare sex, causing her to shiver. She chased the warmth of his body as he adjusted himself, parting from her closeness for just a moment, making her all but whimper. 

They didn’t need words, despite their new trend of back and forth quips– and it was nice to not have to say anything. She let him take the lead, as he was more experienced than she. His legs were between hers, keeping them open as he glided his member between her folds, gathering the wet slick that had been ruminating since they came to the closet, then he slid into her. Lyanna stifled a gasp, the sensation still so unfamiliar– it wasn’t painful like before, as she was prepared for it now, but it was a feeling of stretching she wasn’t used to. 

Aegon, in turn, huffed a moan into her neck, murmuring something in broken High Valyrian under his breath. He sheathed himself to the hilt inside of her, resting both hands on her hips, which had the perfect little clefts for handles, he noted. He didn’t move right away, savoring the warmth and tightness of her, squeezing around him like she was all but made for him. 

“P-please,” she whispered, so quietly, into the shell of his ear.

He set a wonderfully slow pace, which only sped up with each kiss they shared, their tongues mingling and dancing to the soft sound of Aegon’s heavy stones smacking up against Lyanna’s core. Their cacophony became a full on symphony of wet, slapping noises, coupled with their borderline obscene sounding kissing as they moaned into one another’s mouths.

 It felt like something of newness for both of them as Aegon’s thumb came up to circle at her clit– Lyanna was experiencing a fullness and indulgence in having her husband slotted in her so deliciously. Aegon was experiencing something akin to euphoria at the fact that he was fucking someone who wanted him, whom he did not pay, and was not doing so out of duty. He had been a bit hesitant on the latter at first, but there was no way in the Hells that she was faking such debaucherous, beautiful little moans. This was sensual ecstasy and closeness that they’d both never felt before in their lives. 

Lyanna’s whining became more pronounced as Aegon’s attention on her clit came to fruition– she clenched around him like a vice, feeling a small dribble of wetness soak around his cock. This act alone brought Aegon to his own completion, the wetness of her slick now mingling with his seed as he spilled inside of her, deep enough to hopefully take root. He bit onto the lobe of her ear gently as he came, whimpering. 

Lyanna quite liked that sound– of her husband whimpering into her ear as he emptied himself. It made her put both hands on each side of his face and kiss him again– but soft, like his little whimpers. It wasn’t something born of lust, but something completely different. Something that they both really couldn’t name yet.

Coming down from both of their highs, Aegon quickly situated himself back into his trousers– but not before reaching two fingers to his wife’s folds and pushing back in the seed that threatened to leak from her.

“Aegon,” she keened, dangerously close to overstimulation as he gave a cheeky flick to her wrought-over clit. “E-Enough– too much…” 

“I couldn’t resist,” Aegon chuckled as he pulled her undergarments back up, snug once more against her. “I don’t suppose we are returning to dinner?” 

“Gods– I don’t think I can. I am still reeking of wine and I won’t be able to look them all in the eyes when we come back looking as if the cat just ate the canary.”

“Or the dragon ate the rabbit?” 

“... I am sure I can feign sickness just one time– what do you think? Mayhaps we should retire early tonight.” Lyanna flattened out her dress.

“... we?” 

“Yes– we.” 

“We as in… me and you? In the same room? Together?” 

“That is what ‘we’ means, Aegon.” 

“... I suppose I could be convinced.”

–

They did indeed retire early that night, but not before going for round two, then three. A thoroughly fucked out Lyanna rested in bed, her body riddled in hickies of Aegon’s doing, her fingers tangled in his hair. She was well and fast asleep, Aegon noted. 

He loathed to untangle himself from her– she was so nice and warm and soft… but something inside of him nagged. Something broken and heinous tugged at his humanity, willing him to get out of bed and dress, donning his usual thick black cloak.

Off to the Silk Streets. To sate the broken parts of him and to quell the incessant nagging within his head.

Your fault, your fault.

[atopfourthwall]

Geez Louise that was an aggressive response. I wasn't advising you on how to make everyone stop teasing you, mid level youtubers will always have jerks. I was talking about a proven method to deal with it in a healthy way- judging from your response alone I felt you needed. Think of its this way: you made that comic 17 years ago. Do you really want to be still getting SO angry and snapping at people in another 17? If not at LB but whatever else they'll come up with? But up to you, best of luck.

You're absolutely right it's an aggressive response. Maybe it was an unwarranted one... but your message was frankly unserious and unoriginal. Because your "proven method" is horseshit. "If you let people bully you, they'll stop bullying you." That's what you're recommending - be good natured about people insulting me. It is in fact not healthy to sit there and bear it and pretend I'm okay with it. I was quiet about it for a year or two before I finally started pushing back on it. I was miserable and it was affecting my mental health. They kept doing it - some because they honestly did not realize it upset me (and again, that's who the thread is for and I repeat - speaking out about is what got people to stop). But the other ones? "Do you really want to be still getting SO angry and snapping at people in another 17? If not at LB but whatever else they'll come up with?" Here is what you need to understand and I don't think you do: THESE PEOPLE DON'T FUCKING LIKE ME. They don't like my face. They don't like my voice. They don't like my show. They don't like my sense of humor. They don't like my hat. They don't like that I'm liberal. They don't like that I support LGBT+ people. They don't like that I analyze Power Rangers. They don't like me when I'm happy. They don't like me when I shout. They don't like me when I'm successful. They don't like that I was part of Channel Awesome. They don't like that I'm NOT part of Channel Awesome. They don't like my friends. They don't like me streaming. They don't like me criticizing truly awful people. They don't like when I don't dance to their little nickname. They. Don't. Like. Me. I am a joke to them - a clown, a living meme that they can throw my name out and it's an automatic laugh. I am not a person to them with thoughts and feelings and something that can be hurt. I am only real to them because they think I'm pathetic and they want to bully someone that they think is more pathetic than them. They do not and never will respect me. They see me as the guy who invented Lightbringer 17 years ago. That's it. That is all I will ever be to them... if I'm lucky, because these are the same kind of people who will try to find ANY weakness, anything that's slightly embarrassing I've said or done as a weapon... or just make up complete bullshit to attack me and make that into more memes against me, too. And the fact that you just refer to it as "teasing" me shows everything I need to know, frankly. Because that's all that it is to you - not something that was hurting me. Not something that was affecting my mental health. Not something that I respectfully ask people to stop doing because it makes me uncomfortable. Hell, your original message said I was "constantly" doing it. Two threads a couple years apart with a smattering of me asking one-on-one "Hey, can you not do this? It's actually intended as an insult." The assholes doing it to be assholes just get a block, because why the fuck would I try to engage with them? So yeah, if I'm aggressive in my response, I'm sorry, but your way is NOT healthy. Maybe my way isn't the right way for everyone, sometimes it CAN make things worse... but that's not the case for me and I get tired of bad advice from people who think they understand what's going on.

[sublimecatgalaxy]

Hi, if you are still taking requests would you be willing to write something fluffy with Cassie Howard please?

Sure honey, I haven't written Cassie stuff in so long so this was definitely refreshing! She definitely needs a happy relationship lol.

"She's different since she's met you." Lexi suddenly speaks up from across the room, her eyes watching Cassie and their mom move in the kitchen as they prepare dinner. My head cranes back to look at my girlfriend, her hands carefully putting her hair into a slick bun on the top of her head before she gets to work rolling out the pizza dough, flour all over her face in just moments of helping.

"She's been through a lot." I whisper, thinking back to all the times Cassie's broken down in my arms about the rumors and the videos, the pictures, everything that was circulating throughout our school about her during her, so called, 'wild time'.

Wild time is an understatement.

"I know. But she was so selfish before, she wasn't thinking straight." Lexi sends me a sad smile, hands picking at loose thread in the rip of her jeans. "I think that you were just the breath of fresh air that she so desperately needed."

"Like you and Fezco, huh?" I tease, watching a heated blush break out across Lexi's cheeks at the mention of her secret relationship with the most well known, local drug dealer (who apparently is the biggest softy).

"Yeah, you could say that." She sighs, eyes rolling playfully before moving back to the topic of Cassie. "I never would've guessed she liked girls, ya know? But it kinda makes sense."

"I always thought you were the raging bisexual, Lex." She shrugs proudly and holds her glass of water up to me in a sort of salute, which I do right back to her with a giggle.

"You know me, always keeping people wondering." She boasts. "I guess what I'm trying to say is thanks for helping her become who she is." My heart swells with pride, so proud that I was able to accidentally help Cassie by meeting her but also proud that I managed to help her feel loved after being screwed over by so many people in her life. "I'm happy to have my sister back."

"I'm just lucky to have her- lucky to be in your lives." I smile, looking back at the kitchen to find Cassie staring at Lexi and I, motioning her finger back and forth between us with a hesitant smile.

"Are you guys talking about me?" She squeaks, an embarrassed smile on her lips as she flashes Lexi a desperate look. "Lex, don't scare her off!" She wipes flour onto her shirt before moving to step down into the living room, hands on her hips and eyes wide and frantic.

"Only good things, babe." I promise but she just gives me a look of disbelief, shaking her head at me.

"Mhm, sure."

"Y/n knows better- if she wants shit on you, it's not Lexi who's got those stories, it's me!" Their mom calls out from the kitchen and I snicker, raising a hand to my lips to conceal my grin as Cassie huffs pathetically.

"Mom!" She squeals and Lexi all but falls over laughing. Cassie looks to me and holds a hand up to her mom, her beautiful eyes begging with me to drop this even though she has to know by now that we all love ganging up on her to pick on her.

"Don't humor her, please."

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o- Taglist: @bubblebuttwade @rafelover2405 @leslienjazzy @sorceresss @grxnde-dwt @alex–awesome–22 @bunnietoof @niyamar1e @serialghost @plantlungs @geniusohn @akaliltimmytim @lilaalouuxx @xshariex @elliotsbeigeguitar @elle4404 @lelieja @srhxpci @joselyn001 @taysirene @spinkspanther @thedivineuphoria @peter-maximoffs @tsukishimawhore @poohkie90 @szlaco @distantsighs @nstyles4299 @wolflover384 @givemefoodandlovesstuff @vane28282 @yeswhatever33 @amirrahfranson @vvaalleennttiinna @f-mu @yaspillz @jeyramarie @skylievin@abbybarnes17 @jointherebellion215 @visiondaddy @steezysimfinds @its-ya-gay-boi-luigi @crunchytoenailsyum@glizzymcguirex @beth123lg @melovesmut @rafecameronswhore @ariianelle @write-from-the heart @vampviolets@haylee-e @honee-chai-tea @lokiandbuckywife

s@officiallyunofficialperson@heyaitsklaudia@rosepetalsparks @bluetreecloud20 @scenesofobx @double-shot-of-tequila @1dluver13xx @colbysbrocks @iamasimpingh0e @loveshineslikethesky @id-3-kbro @diorsitgirl @errorfound101-allideasburnedout @neverwillknowme18 @ellyskey @taylors-folk @loversjoy @myaloveee @thyris-is @lagataprrr @aaaaslaaaan @witxhy-lexx @minjix @luvroseee @tee-swizzle @savageneversaw @admiringlove @hysteriahall @piceous21 @starlightandfairies @igotmajordaddyissues @drewstarkey-wife1

[notinthislife50]

Chapter 8

Previous Chapter

Next Chapter

The supporting actors that were with you in this scene, helped you a lot and because this was one of the episodes Rick was directing he was always by your side checking up on you.

As he approached you, you were getting ready for your next scene. He sensed your nerves and knew when you were trying to cover them up with humor.

“You will be great,” he confirmed not wanting to hug as you stood in your underwear." we have half the amount of crew and people on set”

“Thank god I'm not naked, no one would be here.” you tried to laugh trying to break the tension.

You looked at him and you saw he was worried.

“Rick,  I'm an actress,  this is my job.” you laughed again.

“Okay but I am right here with you,” he confirmed again

“I know, I appreciate it” you genuinely said.

For your next scene, you were to be hung up on a hook in the middle of the warehouse, the demons had torn your clothes away,  leaving you in your underwear, making sure they could see the torture that was inflicted on you.

As you stood in the middle of the room getting the rest of the blood and gashes put on, one of the supporting actors approached you “I know I have to get physical with you at some points,  but is there anything I can do that would make you more comfortable?” he asked politely.

“Hey,  just make it look believable, you are acting as much as I am, if not more, I  just have to hang there,  you have to do all the work.” you smiled at him. you both talked about what or what not you could do, then you heard the command “On your marks.”

You smiled at him "Good luck.” you said.

“And action” Rick shouted.

“Not so brave now are you hunter,” the demon pulled your hair so you could look at him.

“Fuck you.” you spat at him.

In return, he smacked you across the face. and taking his knife in his hand he slowly circled your anti-possession tattoo.

“One slash of this and we can easily take control of your body, every time we break you,  we can just pop in and heal you,  an endless cycle of fun” he laughed then plunged the knife into your tattoo causing you to roar in pain.

Jensen and Jared stood behind the scenes, they knew how these scenes could take a toll.

And cut, take it from the top” Rick shouted.

And you all reset the scene resulting in about four takes until he finally had the perfect scene.

You were given an hour to rest and eat before you had to head back again.

After the hour you were hooked back up again and the demon actor circled you again.

“How did this one become a hunter, look how fucking pathetic she is.” they laughed at you.

“Why the hell would Lucifer choose her?” another one sneered.

The first take of listening to this you could handle but you ended up shooting the same scene multiple times and into the next day that you finally got into your own head.

Finally when the warehouse scene was over you politely thanked the supporting actors and flinging the dressing gown around you,  you quickly made your way out the door. You needed a drink and you needed it bad.

You made your way to a driver that was not Clif,  as you know he would tell the boys you were on your way home. the man could read you like a book. And Jensen and Jared had a scene to film where they were searching for you so you didn’t want to worry them.

You jumped out of the car and thanked the driver. Grabbing the tequila bottle from the kitchen you made your way to your bathroom and slid down between the wall and the toilet annoyed at yourself you let yourself get to, well yourself.

Tears and disgust flooded your body. Your phone was vibrating out of control somewhere and you just wished the annoying noise would stop.

You didn’t even hear the front door slam open or didn’t notice the light being turned on in your bathroom.

“What the fuck Y/N” Jensen yelled at you, but when seeing you he immediately dropped to his knees in front of you.

“Y/N” he whispered gently,  but you stared into space,  making no sign that you heard him.

“Y/N” He touched your shoulder this time your eyes slowly made your way to his.

“Hey,” you slurred quietly.

“Hi pretty girl, are you okay?” he asked.

“Of course, I am an actor.” you smiled tearfully taking another drink from the bottle.

Jensen took his phone out of his pocket and you heard him faintly say "I got her,  she's home.”

Jensen tried to get your attention “Look at me” He pulled your face towards him and his heart broke at the sight of you.

“You don’t have to be here Jensen,  I’m okay on my own.” you wept “Please go away before I get you in trouble." tears falling down your face pushing him away “I never meant to get you in trouble I promise " your head rolled to the side.

Jensen grabbed your head making you look at him “I know sweetheart,  I promise I know." He knew exactly what you were talking about.

You forced your head out of his hands and leaned on the wall. “I want Jared” you sobbed “Not you."

Jensen’s heart broke “I know you hate me Y/N,  but I promise the last thing I ever wanted to do was hurt you, ” he then stood up so he could get Jared.

In your drunken state, you spat “I don’t hate you, Jensen,  I never have,  it’s actually quite the opposite. But I’m not a home wrecker I'm not that type of person no matter what everyone thinks about me.”

You took another sip from the bottle only this time Jensen took it off you.

“Sweetheart no one thinks that,” he promised.

“I thought I was over my past how pathetic I am. All I could hear was everyone I knew saying those things.” you cried hard.

“You are not pathetic, far from it your amazing and we all think so, but please let me get you off the floor and into bed” he pleaded.

You gave in and let him carry you to your bed. You sobbed heavily and he brushed the hair from your face. " I promise Y/N,  we all love you and one day you will see you how we see you.” he kissed your forehead before heading back into the living room grabbing a bag and some water and filling Jared in.

Jensen lay beside you listening to your soft sobs and when you were finally asleep he closed his eyes promising himself he would never let you down again.

@senjoritanana @deansgirl79 @suckitands33 @deans-baby-momma @dragony937 @linzerrr @fraidoftedark 

[fbfh]

happy Turkey day!!!

can i get some jealous!Leo headcanons? 🥹

HAPPY THANKSGIVING SAUCEGAWDESSS MY BELOVED!!!!!!!!

jealous Leo is interesting bc he's worked through so much self doubt and confidence issues and insecurity that he knows no one else has a chance with you. he knows how much you like him, or he's at least starting to get a good idea of it. so when he does get jealous it's almost fun. it's building up this tension that he's going to have a field day with. he watches closely as whoever this guy is touches your arm and tries to compare hand sizes and tries to make you laugh with his (in Leo's opinion, pathetic) sense of humor. he watches close and sucks his teeth and clenches his jaw and crosses his arms. you don't even notice the guy once you glance back over at Leo because he looks so fucking hot when he does that. he's wearing a button up today like he often does, and the sleeves are rolled up. he seems very very slightly pissed. just a little. but you pick up on it. he's doing literally every attractive thing he could possibly do, and he has your full attention. he knows this, you know this, but the guy who's still trying to convince you to get drinks with him seems to be the only one who doesn't notice. Leo knows you're his and he's yours, but that's not going to stop him from patiently waiting, biding his time until you're behind closed doors so he can tease the living shit out of you. he'll edge you with his long pretty fingers, sucking big hickeys into the most obvious and the most intimate places he can, just because he likes how much you react to his touch. he'll mutter the filthiest shit he can conjure into your ear, turning into the cockiest little shit. there's a chance you might not even realize that he's acting like this because he's jealous, but once you figure it out, you won't even need to rile him up to get him to do it again. he's smart enough to realize that's your end game, and he'll play along. almost too well. he'll have you writhing and moaning and shaking and all you can think about is how glad you are that you know him so well, that he knows you so well. and for that guy who wouldn't stop staring at you.

[iheartgracie]

catalina martin quotes from the spanish love deception

“The chances of him,” I told Rosie, “being actually serious are the same chances I have of having Chris Evans pop out of nowhere and confess his undying love for me.”

“Ignoring me won’t make me disappear. You know that.”

I did. “But that doesn’t mean I won’t keep trying,” I muttered under my breath.”

“Sorry about that, Aaron. We are not ignoring you.” Her grin strained. “We are … debating something.”

“We are ignoring him though. You don’t need to spare his feelings. He doesn’t have any.”

“If you could, tell Aaron that I don’t think one can laugh at, or much less understand, jokes when one lacks a sense of humor, please. That would be great. Thanks.”

“I’m pretty sure my words are reaching Catalina down there just fine, but if you could tell her that I have work to do and I cannot entertain this much longer, I would appreciate it.”

Down there? Stupidly large man.”

“I did not use that word.”

“You … sort of did, sweetie,” my best friend—no, former best friend as of right now—confirmed. Eyes narrowed, I mouthed, What the hell, traitor?”

“you must be experiencing serious hearing issues because, yet again, you heard wrong. I don’t need you, Aaron Blackford.” I swallowed, willing some of the dryness away. “I could write it down for you if you want. Send you an email, too, if that’d help at all.”

“She did,” I heard Miss Traitor confirm. My head whirled in her direction. “What?” She shrugged, signing her death sentence. “You did, honey.”

I needed new friends. ASAP.”

“And did you not say that your ex-boyfriend is the best man and thinking of standing in the vicinity of him, alone and lame and pathetically single—those were your words again—made you want to tear off your own skin?”

I had. I had said that.”

“At some point in the past, I would have thrown darts at a poster of his face.”

“Nothing to think about.” I cut my hand through the air between us. Then, I smiled my version of Rosie’s fake, toothy grin. “I’d take a chimpanzee dressed in a tuxedo before taking you.”

“Haven’t you watched any romantic comedies ever?” I watched the scowl deepen. “Not even The Wedding Date?”

No answer, just more of that arctic staring.

“Do you even watch movies? Or do you just … work?”

“I’d rather give up chocolate for a full year than admit to Aaron that he was right.”

“Lina: I have no idea what you mean. Is he waiting for something?

Lina: Something like a heart transplant? I heard he doesn’t have one.”

“He pointed at me with the pencil. “This? Seriously?”

I snagged it out of his hand. “It cheers me up.” I dropped it in the cup. “Does it offend your tastes, Mr. Robot?”

“I have no idea why you have this impulse to fly in with your red cape like a nerdy Clark Kent and save the day, but no, thanks. You might look a little like him, but I’m not a damsel in distress.”

“You’ve never needed anyone to fight your battles, Catalina. That’s one of the things I respect the most about you.”

[jovenshires]

wait smosh taskmaster would be SUCH a massive slay wow. immediately my mind went to shayne as alex horne ! but greg i could see as diff options bc i don’t think any cast members embody that archetype personality wise as is but i could def see them put their own spins on em as a character if that makes sense ? would love to see what damien or chanse could come up with (bonus pts for being tall). but i also just realized arasha would be good too lmaoo. OH and that tommy as greg and spencer as alex would be SO good. and then for contestants would love to have angela, two that don’t end up in the above roles, keith, and than a rando crew member that we don’t see that often to shake it up - maybe vida bc they killed it in tntl and they do improv? wait also loved patrick making a reappearance so him as well. obvi would love to see most of the cast /crew participate as contestants if it’s like a recurring series ! ok clearly this show is perf for smosh considering i included a bajillion people in this ask pls kiana i’m begging 🙏 - spencersagnew

@spencersagnew YOU. YOU GET ME. i love your takes,,,, shayne as alex and arasha as greg specifically is everything to me. i'll put my cast out there but your takes are incredible and you've never been wrong.

tommy as the taskmaster. i think he just has that dry humor and can lean into the antagonistic nature really well while still being a fair judge and interacting well with the contestants. he's also just one of my favorite hosts of anything ever so ill let him do whatever he wants

garrett as the taskmaster's assistant. LISTEN. LISTEN. we need someone pathetic. someone who can be a punching bag. someone who's a little unhinged. someone who will get bullied by the cast and just take it, but also someone who has the Audacity. and That's Garrett. he fits the bill. i'll say honorable mention to shayne bc i think he would do this really well too but there's something about garrett that i think people would just take to using him as a puppet, a prop, whatever they needed for their tasks. and then get shit from him as soon as they're in the studio.

ian as contestant number one (The Grumpy Old Man). look, i have the taskmaster casting system boiled down to a science. i truly believe almost every cast can fit into these categories (almost! almost all!) and so i'm going by the same metric for smoshmaster. and we're starting off strong with the grumpy old man archetype. i think he'll be generally annoyed by everything. tommy, garrett, the other contestants, the tasks, whatever. he has a really dry sense of humor that'll balance everybody else out, and an above-it-all attitude that you can't help but respect. examples of this include julian clary, frankie boyle, and dara o briain.

angela as contestant number two (The World's Strangest Woman). every season needs one woman who just goes about the tasks in The Most Insane Way, and that's angela. point blank period. is she gonna win? probably not! but who knows! she's a wild card! she's the one who says her legs are basically just arms without fingers, you know. i think she'd just panic and do. whatever. no planning, go with her gut instinct. she'd also be super competitive and her reactions when she realized just how bad she fucked up.... incredible. examples include lucy beaumont, jenny eclair, and fern brady.

spencer as contestant number three (The Loveable Goofball). look. LOOK. you know him. you love him. he probably won't win. but god is it fun to watch. he's generally kind of pathetic, and while he fails miserably, you can't help but root for him, feel bad for him, and point and laugh at him all at once. he's going about the tasks either half-heartedly or putting his whole soul into it with absolutely no in-between. he might win an episode, but it's because the edit is throwing him a bone. spencer's really good at putting on that character of. miserable dude. the heel of it all. but also balancing that out with his quick wit and intelligence. he's perfect for this. some examples are susan wokoma, ivo graham, and john kearns

chanse as contestant number four (The Fan Favorite). he's hot. he's smart. he's funny. everybody likes him. he is the People's Champion. everyone wants him to win - even the taskmaster is a Little biased. he has electric chemistry with everyone, somehow, you can't really figure out how. he absolutely kills ALL the tasks but especially the prize tasks. i also think chanse would just have the funniest reactions to what everyone Else is doing. like i think he'd stand by what he did until the bitter end (even if he did something fucking insane) but everyone else he would relentlessly make fun of. god i want him on this show so bad. anyway, my examples for this are sam campbell, kiell smith-bynoe, and munya chawawa.

courtney as contestant number five (The Only Competent One on the Board). everyone else is fucking insane, but courtney is holding down the fort. she's always handling the tasks in a smart, efficient way that seems like the most logical way to go about it. they frequently outsmart the prompts and the competition. whether or not they win it all, they just seem like they deserve it most. her humor also brings a really nice balance of riding that line of silly goofy and smart and quick. i think courtney rounds out this cast really well (and is my personal pick to win <3). examples of this are sue perkins, mae martin, and sarah milican.

im flexible on the teams, although i think my personal pick is spencer / courtney / angela and ian / chanse bc. comedy to me. also i will say i think i could go on for like. at least two more seasons building different casts truly this is not the Only combo. anyway kiana call me i've got big plans

[silent-raven13]

A Spider-woman name Billie 6

(Part 5)

"Papá!" Mariana 2020 launch her tiny body to her dad's arms which caught Hobie 138b by surprised. The little girl was quick enough to response without anyone to noticed. "Haha!"

Hobie 2020 caught his pup, "Careful, darling. What if you fell like Humpty Dumpty and crack your little skull, hmm?" He cooed a bit being a bit morbid with his questions.

Miles 2020 shook his head, "Aye, don't say that." He lightly slap his husband's arm, "It's bad enough I worry about them crawling on the walls!"

"I thought you want me to teach them how to safe?" Hobie 2020 gave a low chuckle still showing off his canines, they were more sharper yet smaller than Alpha's.

Alpha 2010 crossed his arms, "Pfft, pathetic Alpha."

Petie giggles, "Well, he always have a dark humor to his teachings..."

"Why is he so fucking fine?" Mimi 1015 whispers at Miles 1610 and Miles 43, "Like he's so damn- hmmm!"

"What are you saying, luv?" Hobie 138d overhears his girlfriend, "Hmm? Hmm?" He got all up in her face being a bit jealous. "Careful, darling. I will put a baby in you."

"Huh?" Mimi 1015 pucker her lips with her eyes wide.

Miles 42 rolled his eyes, "You do realize she's trans!"

"Biology ain't real. That's capitalism and with the right science..." Hobie 138d grins widely, "Like genetically modified my Sunflower's sex then I can put a baby in her."

"No. No! You will not go there!" Miles 1019 scowls with anger, "I will fuck you up!"

"FUCK YOU UP!" Mariana 2020 shouted.

"Mari no! That's a bad word!" Miles 2020 gasps.

Hobie 2020 laughs in amusement, "You can easily ask Miguel 2299, he's an Alpha and knows how to make regular blokes into Omegas."

"Be quiet! They don't need to know!" Miguel 928 growls at the Alpha.

"They wouldn't do it. They would have to ask a Miguel for help." Mariana added seeing all the Hobies scowling at the idea. "Hehehe."

Mimi 1015 holds her boyfriend's face, "I don't want to have a baby, bae. I am a happy trans woman."

"Okay, luv." Hobie 138d heart melts at his boo's cute peck on the lips.

Hobie 2020 smirks at Alpha, "Oi, how was the fight? Had to escape with some old relics."

"It was terrible. We needed you and you left! Leaving me with that nitwit!" Alpha scowls.

"He told us countless of times he was gonna blow up the place, and I saved important art." The older punker Prowler shrugs, his claw gently hover over his daughter, who's trying to touch it. "Easy, darling."

"I wanna touch it, papá!" Mariana 2020 whines.

"Tu papi is wearing some dangerous weapons, mi vida. It's better if you don't touch." Miles 2020 hums, and saw his son, Karl reaching out for him. "Awe, miss me?"

Karl nodded, "Yeah! Yeah! Daddy!" One of the Hobies handed him back to his daddy, the older Spider-man happily holds his pup. The small boy giggles with delight, "Hehehe, daddy!"

"Yes, mi amor. I'm here." The Omega kisses his son's round cheeks having his scent blooming with sweet protective pheromones for his children.

"Ah-hahahaha." Karl snuggles against his daddy, his chubby hand tugging on the Spider-man suit. "Daddy, hungry?"

"We'll be there soon." Miles 2020 smiles warmly at his pup.

The Hobies watched with awe at how cute the Omega looks. The Miles being bashful by the Alpha. "Come on, guys. Chop-chop! We're starving!" Gwen said at them.

"Yeah, I'm hungry!" Mayday stomp her foot hating to wait any longer.

The group were entering the cafeteria finally making it, then they were bombarded with a Spider-man that had white and red with black accents to it. They were surprised to find Lupe without her mask looking pissed off with her own silver Spider suit, "And how many times I told you do not talk to me like that!"

"Ohhh, finally some good action." Hobie 2020 chuckles darkly with his confused variants looking at him. "Just enjoy and watch this beautiful drama." Mariana 2020's big eyes watches Lupe and the male Spider-man arguing with their Spider sense off the roof.

Petie 2010 saw Alpha smirking widely, "Heh, looks like Miguel 660 is starting trouble with Lupe, again."

"DAD?" Gabriel 660 called out being in shock. Wow how embarrassing for his dad to argue with another Spider-hero.

The Spider-man held his hand up with one finger for his son to wait a moment being busy with arguing with Lupe. "Mira me, I didn't talk to you like that. All I said it doesn't take a pendeja to figure out the implication of artificial manipulation!"

"Oh wow, did he had to call her a pendeja?" Billie winced at the arguments.

The young Spider-heroes never saw this Miguel O'Hara before, in fact he was shorter than Miguel 928 and a bit leaner. When Miguel 660's molecule suit removed his masks to reveal a redhead, pale chisel middle age white man, the whole Spider Band gang eyes widen.

"Ain't no way! That's a Miguel?" Gwen asked out loud.

Pavtri took a quick picture for his blog, "So he does exist! I heard he was one of the main Spider-men doing all the multi-verse stuff."

"Why is he too...." Miles 42 trails off being hella confused.

Miles 43 pitched in, "That's not a Miguel O'Hara," he put on a white voice accent, "That's a Michael O'Hara. Looks like his Irish genetics won."

"Pfft!" Hobies 138b choked up laughing out loud. "Hahaha."

Miles 1610 said, "Come on, guys. It's bound to happen..." His eyes landed on Miguel 928 to Miguel 660 seeing the massive difference.

"So he's a redhead here... makes sense since his boy is freakin' white, too." Miles 1019 added being disappointed at how the man looks.

Mariana 1022 whisper to punk Miles, "I get what you mean. Brown Miguel is much finer." They both nodded in agreement. Punk Miguel overheard feeling pleased with this.

Gabriella 1042 gasps with joy, "OH is he my papá, too!" She looks disappointed at the redhead being confused, "Why he looks... hmmm? Like an old man?" She looks at her dad.

Jess laughs out loud, "Oh honey, it's part of the multi-verse. You'll find a light skinned Jess here, too."

"Oh..." Gabriella being a bit sad, "I want another papá like papá!" She open her arms wide explaining, "Tall, big and have brown hair!"

"Mmhhmm, me too." Mimi 1015 hums to herself.

Miguel 928 said to his gem, "Mija, the multi-verses have so many wonders. You might see more of me or him..." He looks over at Miguel 660 being unpleased with the outcome.

"Come on, guys. Let's go find a table to eat. Knowing Lupe... this is gonna be a long argument." Jess said to her friends.

Alpha said, "She always know how to twist your words..."

"Can you blame her when you have to deal with him and his egoistical smartass?" Hobie 2020 asked with a bit a smirk on his handsome face.

"Yeah, not gonna lie he's a big jerk!" Peter 616 said.

"Oh, Billie! That's Lupe! We can ask her to be your mentor!" Marian 1022 happily said to the teenage Spider-woman.

"Oh, that'll be great. Let's go!" Billie smiles, "Gabe, come on. Let's say hi to your dad!"

"Wait, we need to get seats for the kids! I totally wanna see this Michael O'Hara!" Miles 43 said out loud, "Miles 1610, can you watch over the kids, please!"

"YEAH!" Mimi 1015 and Mariana 1022 nodded.

"Huh, why me?" Miles 1610 shouted.

"Oh look, Pav! Spider Band is here!" Gwen shouted pointed at Peni, Noir, Spider-Ham, and their other friends eating at a big table.

"Oh, hey! Petie, long time no see gorgeous!" Deadpool spotted the Omega while having lunch with his Peter 616b and the Spider-band!

Petie 2010 panics, "EEEP!" Being picked up by Deadpool like a bride. "Put me down, Deadpool! Peter 616b!"

"Ugh, Wade..." Peter 616b sounded tired.

"Hey guys! Have you met the Hobies and Miles!" Gwen went to introduce the Spider Band with the many variants.

"Oh yeah!" Peni said.

Margo chuckles, "Have you met Grayson 2100?" She had the male version of Gwen by her, who was chewing his food.

"Hey!" He waves at her.

"Pavtri had you met Pavtri 50134? He's from this really cool Space world!" Spider-Ham pointed up.

"What's up!" Pavtri 50134 had a much deeper voice and a robotic arm.

"Whaaaa! That's so cool! You gotta tell me everything!" Pavtri got super excited!

Miles 2020 went with Miles 1610 to find spots for the kids and the other adults, "Thanks, Miles 2020 or is there a nickname..." Miles 1610 slowly asked. Hobie 138b carried Gonzalo 1022 and Aaron on the other arm.

"Hmm, you can call me, Millie." Miles 2020 winks at him. "It does get annoying with all the numbers, huh?"

"Oh gawd, yes! Finally someone said it. I can never remember all of it at times." Miles 1610 finally said while he put Gonzalo 1015 in a high chair. "And it's always hard with nicknames too. Because I get it if your name is Mimi and my nickname is Mimi, but we gotta be different."

"Hahaha, it is hard, but will get use to it." Millie giggles as he put his son in a high chair. "Right, honey." He kisses his son's forehead.

"Yeah, daddy. We lea-wn!" Karl nodded.

"Awe, such cuties!" Kitty appeared with her own gang from a mission, Meows Morales on her shoulder.

"Oh wow, you're here too!" Miles 1610's eyes widen seeing most of his friends here in the cafeteria. Sometimes they would find them at different times or they eat after a mission.

"Yeah, what are the odds! Kaine must be freaking out to find his teammates fighting again. I always did say Lupe and Miguel 660 should never be in the same team. They are always fighting."

"Oh hi, Meows!" Billie 1610 gasps at the cartoon cat.

Meow Morales quickly jump from one shoulder to Miles 1610's should to the table to look at Billie 1610, "HI! Are you Billie? I have a sister, too. Her name is Bitty Morales, because she's so tiny and cute! A very tiny kitten!"

"Ohh, kitty me?" Billie 1610 became so excited.

Hobie 138b smiles with amusement, "Well I'll be chuffed! Sunflower, your variant got a lil sprog too!"

"Huh uh!" Miles 1610's eyes gleamed with joy, then had his head turn to Meows, "Awe, when will I see her, Meows!"

"She is a cute little darling." Hobie 138e appeared with May 2010 in his arms, "Isn't that right, Kitty?" He look at the Spider-woman with a grin.

Kitty giggles, "Yup, I saw her once. She's so small even a Small doesn't fit her."

"Aweee, we wanna meet her!" Miles 1610 said as Billie 1610 agreed too.

Meows stood, "Later, because she likes her naps and bottle of warm milk that mamá makes!" Then he went to Miles 2020 for a hug, "Miles!"

"Oh, hello Meows. Surprised to see you here? Where's your Hobie?" Miles 2020 hugs the cartoon cat.

"I dunno!" Meows nuzzling against the omega, smelling his sweet pheromones. For him, it's like cat nip in a way. So addicting and calming. Making a small purring sound.

"Awe, so cute!" Kitty awed.

"Who call my name? I'm comin'!" Hobie Pine appears spotting his Sunflower, with a simple quick run and hop. He took his bae into his arms, "Mine!"

Hobie 138b chuckles, "Nice, lad. A true Hobie knows how to get their Sunflowers."

Hobie Pine stood with a slow nod, while snuggling against his Meows. "Wait, I wanna snuggle with Millie!" Meows whines, being out of his sweet trance.

"Nope! Only me!"

"Hahaha, Meows is so funny." Mayday giggles as she pulled a seat with Gabriella and Gerald.

Miles 1610 said, "Wait, Hobie Pine... where did you come from?" He looks over finding all the Spider-animals appearing to eat lunch.

"We finished a mission and wanted to eat lunch! Meows, why did you leave me, darling!" Hobie Pine pouts.

"I didn't leave you! I went on a mission with Kitty, Ben Riley and Petra!"

"Oh wow, I would think Ben would be with Lupe seeing how he's good friends with Kaine." Miles 2020 said.

"Hahaha, they had different schedules. Kaine ended up with Lupe, Charlotte, Slick."

"Slick joined too? Blimey, what an interesting day." Hobie 138b said as he put Gonzalo 1022 in a high chair and Aaron in another. "We might even find Hobie 138..."

"Hey, Mig! Where have you been, mate?" Hobie 138 appeared having to fist bump punk Miguel.

"Spoke too soon, bae?" Miles 1610 giggles.

"I did." Hobie 138b agreed.

"I hope daddy gets me a burger! I'm so hungry!" Mayday said.

"I want some chicken nuggets." Gerald said.

Gabriella saw her dad getting in the middle with Lupe and Miguel 660, "I hope papá is okay."

"Don't worry, Gabby. He's fine. Besides, this is his job." Miles 1610 comforts the little girl.

"What did you say?" Lupe scowls at Miguel 660.

Miguel 928 had his hands held up, "Okay, Lupe. He didn't mean it like that he onl-" Lupe held her hand up to him to stay quiet.

Miguel 660 sighs, "I said working with you is like pulling teeth! It's exhausting! Te gusta chingar mi vida, Guadalupe! It's frustrating!"

"Oh me? Let's not forget you, Miguel O'Hara got no business to dumbing down basic shit! And how dare you? You act all high and mighty, but when something bites us in the us- It's never Miguel O'Hara 660!" She claps back at him.

Kaine appeared hiding behind Miguel with a soft whisper, "You see how me and Sun Spider gotta deal with."

"Lyla only put you four together because you two always worked well at the end of the day." Miguel 928 tries to calm the two down. "You all did finish the mission."

"Yeah." Lupe sounding displeased.

Miguel 660 sighs, "Barely..." He look at Lupe, "She's the one that didn't follow my plan."

"Oh no way you're gonna throw me under the bus! Ugh, you such an ass!" Lupe said, "Alright, whose fault was it, when somebody decided to break the control panel, hmmm?" She got into Miguel 660's face.

"I only did that because Sun Spider couldn't hack it! Well, who's fault was it, when we need the chip and you threw it into the water!"

The two were yelling at each other like little kids. Miguel 928 sighs, "enough you two. Just apologize and get on with your day."

"No." Miguel 660 huffed with his arms crossed.

"Pfft, like an apology would come out of his big mouth with that big head!" Lupe huffed.

"At least, I don't flaunt mi tetas at the enemy." Miguel 660 bitterly commented.

"What was that?" Lupe asked, hearing his words.

"Nothing!"

She got right into his face with a dark scowl, "That's right, you better stay quiet." She turns back to her spot, "And that haircut is so ugly. Everyone knows you got a big ass forehead. Hairline receding grandpa! Gonna end up looking like your daddy!"

Miguel 660 gasps in shock then shouted, "AM NOT!"

"AM TOO!"

"AM NOT!"

AM TOO!" The two were shouting in each other faces.

Gabriel 660 shook his head while Billie looked terrified, "Wow, I never knew they can be so scary."

"Lupe is old school and Miguel 660 is always rude." Mariana pointed out.

Punk Miguel looks at Miguel 928, "Are you gonna fix this?"

"At this point," Miguel 928 broke the two apart, "Enough! Los Dos son pedejos!-" receiving a deadly glare from Lupe, "Well, mostly Miguel 660..."

"Hey!"

"Dad, come on! Just apologize to Lupe. This is embarrassing! My friend is here." Gabe 660 went up to his dad to say.

"What?" Miguel 660 looks at Billie, "Your friend? I thought she was your girlfriend."

"WHAT! NO WAY!" Gabriel shouted being shy about it.

Lupe noticed the young girl, "Ohh, who is this adorable Spider-woman?" Then looks at Gabriel, "It's fine, Gabe. I know how to tussle with your dumb daddy. Anyway, is she your girlfriend!"

Billie 1613 giggles, "No, I'm Billie Mariana Morales from Earth 1613! I'm a Spider-woman!"

"Lupe, I was wondering if you can teach her the ropes. She needs an instructor... a mentor!" Mariana 1022 said happily.

"Ohh, so this is the famous Billie! Alright, I'm happy to be your mentor, but you might need to know I'm a bit harsh and fair."

"Not to mention una maldita bruja, pinche vieja." Miguel 660 scoffs, then Miguel 928 and Gabriel 660 cover the Spider-man's mouth with panic.

Lupe glares over at them, "What was that?"

"NOTHING!" Gabriel 660 and Miguel 928 shouted together. While Miguel 660 muffling through their hands trying to breathe.

Kaine stood with his hands together, "Oh wow, so fast!"

"Huh uh," Lupe pucker her lip having to eye the Spider-men then look back at the two Spider-woman, "Anyway, can you handle that?"

"Yeah, I'll do whatever it takes!" Billie 1613 smiles happily.

Deadpool holds Petie like he was a trophy wife, "Come on, wifey! Let's eat chimichangas together!"

"Wahhh, someone help me!" Petie cries out loud.

"Wade, seriously? Let go of Petie!" Peter 616b shouted.

Miles 1610 sat in the middle between Hobie 138b and Billie 1610. Lunch was on Miguel 928 seeing how everyone he mostly talk to, and common acquaintances.

Gabriella sat next to her dad as she happily talk to Lupe, "Wow, your web glows like mi papá?"

"Yeah, mi niña." Lupe happily smiles, "Mines glows a bit lime green."

"Oh cool!" Gabriella happily said, then turns to Billie 1613, "Can your web glow?"

"No, actually I make my own web shooters... but I can do this." She can make her fingers have electricity similar to Miles' venom strike. "I'm a bit rusty."

Miguel 660 chews his lunch, "More useful than a glowing organic webbing..."

Lupe elbow hard into his stomach with her snapping, "Shut up, you jerk!"

"You two never learn." Jess sighs.

Gerald chews his chicken nugget while he gawks at Mayday, "Wow, you got two burgers?"

"Huh uh! I'm starving." Mayday happily bites into her burger.

Peter 616 said to Sun Spider, Kaine and Kitty, "Look I get it, we need some sort of upgrade for the app, but me and Margo are swapped!"

"Lyla can do so much too." Sun Spider pointed out.

A bit downward Hobie 2020 casually talks to the Hobies, "Rule one, if your darling Sunflower gives you the silence treatment, always do as he says. But you have to be mad to get there." He handed his daughter a french fry on her high chair.

"Tank coo, papá!" Mariana grab her french fry taking a bite. "Mmm."

"No problem, my little anarchist." Hobie 2020 gently rub his daughter's cheek then went back to the Hobies, "Also, always give him a little shoulder massage. That always work for me. Why you think I've been so happily married?"

"Because we were in love!" Miles 2020 sat next to him as he feed Aaron.

"Were? Darling, are you trying to tell me something? Not tired of me?" His mate leans over being clingy. "Who is he?"

"Oh please, bae! I'm just saying we been happily married because we are in love. I wouldn't marry you and given you three pups if I wasn't." Miles 2020 snorted with amusement.

"Mmm, that's good to hear, my mate." Alpha Hobie rest his chin on his Omega's shoulder smelling his scent.

Miles 2020 said to Hobie 138b and Miles 1610, "This what will happen when you marry an Alpha Hobie."

"Wow, having an Alpha must be fun, huh?" Mariana 1022 asked as she feeds her brother.

Mimi 1015 nodded, "Right, all those heated nights."

Miles 42 scoffs, "Gross."

"Hahaha, I mean, I grew up to this life so I do enjoy being with my Alpha." Miles 2020 smiles brightly, "And my pups are mi vida."

"Daddy, more fw-ies, please!" Karl munch on his french fries only having one.

"Here you go, mi bebé." Miles 2020 smiles at his sons.

Hobie 138b look at Miles 1610 for the moment he wished he could give his boyfriend a child. Just seeing the Omega being so protective of his variant's kin, it got him having massive baby fever.

Miles 1610 didn't seem to pay attention to his partner. "Well, you guys really got some cute kids. I didn't think I would find an Omega of me... I honestly thought I would be an Alpha."

"Well, there is an Alpha variant of you, but it's so rare. I think he stays out of the rest of Alphas since he's very to himself." Miles 2020 giggles, "There's more Omegas of us than Alphas."

"Says a lot about your personality, lad." Hobie 2022 commented, "There's a lot of Alpha Hobies and Alpha Helens."

"Marianas are also Omegas and Betas. I haven't met an Alpha of her yet." His mate added.

Hobie 138b and the other Hobies turn their heads, "Helen?" He asked, speaking for his variants.

"Ohh, Helen. I wonder if we'll see her! She's so fun!" Mariana 1022 said.

Hobie 2020's smirk showing off his perfect sharp canines, "Helens are our female variants, per se. Though, I don't believe in such labels, but she is here."

"Oh wow. I need to see her, too." Miles 1610 gasps, "A girl Hobie!" He tries to imagine his partner with breasts, but it was so hard.

"Sunflower, what are you looking at?"

"Nothing!"

"Come on, darling. You just imagine me as a woman!"

"Maybe."

Hobie 2020 saw his son Aaron yawning, "Darling, did Berserk have his nap?"

"No, they couldn't. Probably after this." His mate answered him.

"Wait, Berserk? I thought his name was Aaron?" Miles 1610 asked.

"Funny story... while I was giving birth to three pups and being so exhausted I let my husband name out pups." Miles 2020 explains, "I let him pick their first names and..."

Hobie 2020 chuckles with his dark eyes on his variants being interested, "Brat, Berserk, and Brute."

"Brat Mariana, Berserk Aaron, and Brute Karl..." Miles 2020 added, "I had to give them a middle name since..."

"Because your kids are named after Powerpuff girls?" Mimi 1015 asked.

"What? No, it was an act of rebellion. When they grow up to be mischievous to society!" Hobie 2020 pouts, "What's a Powerpuff Girl?"

This made some Miles snicker to themselves while the Hobies look lost. "I think those are great names." Hobie 138b pouted at his giggling boyfriend.

"Oh they are, but it's just that..." He kept giggling.

From another table, Gwen and Pavtri talking to the gang. "No way. So that's what happen."

"Yup, it sucked. But we did complete the mission." Peni said.

"Yeah, we kicked butt and all." Noir hums.

Meows being snuggled by Hobie Pine, "Hobie!"

"I like this." His boyfriend snuggles against him.

Then a tall woman with thick braided wicks went over to the tables. She spotted Mariana 1022 first, "Hello, darling!" Slouching over her with one arm wrapping around her friend's neck.

"Oh! Helen, you're here!" Mariana gasp.

"Yeah, I thought I needed to make an appearance. Sometimes this place gives me the creeps- all corporate and mundane. Eck!" The female punk stood with a disgust look on her face.

All the gang from the table gawks. That's Helen Brown, a tall female Spider-Punk, she had similar features of Hobie. The only thing is more piercings and more accessories onto her punk outfit.

"Wow, she's so cool." Miles 1610 gasps.

"And cute." Mimi 1015 hums.

Miles 43 said, "Yup!"

Helen sat next to Mariana having to push punk Miguel, "Anyway lass, what's all this? A party."

"No, everyone happened to have lunch." Marian saw Punk Miguel scowling at Helen's rude gesture, then said, "I can introduce you to everyone!"

"Alright." She shrugs.

Miles 1610 watches all the gang enjoying their lunch. Hobie 138b saw his boyfriend happily eating, "Sunflower, you good?"

"I'm just happy. I got to meet new Spider-heroes and be with my friends." He snuggles against his boyfriend. "Everything feels perfect."

"It does, doesn't it?" Hobie 138b smiles at him.

Miles 42 sat next to Billie 1613, "I'm always here for you, okay?"

"Okay! I'm glad." Billie 1613 hugs Miles 42, "We will be the best siblings ever!"

Miles 1019 said, "Don't leave us out!"

"Yeah, we're a team! We work together!" Miles 43 said.

Billie 1610 nodded, "Yeah! Right, Miles."

"Right." Miles nodded, "We're a family."

Billie 1613 smiles widen, "I'm glad I got the courage to come here and meet all you amazing heroes. I can't wait to be apart of this." Everyone went to enjoy their lunch having their own conversations and laughing at their jokes. Billie 1613 became part of the Spider Band without any doubt.

[elvispresleywife]

Oh my love, my darling....(46 years ago on this very day)

My dear, darling, Elvis. Oh where to begin, your the light of my life, the love of my heart and soul. There will never be another. You will have been gone 46 years today. I can't explain the utter sadness and pain I feel at this. I'm no poet, and I don't intend to make this beautiful or poetic, this is just my thoughts and feelings so you know how I feel.

Elvis, my darling I have loved you for so long now, it feels like I've known you forever, I know I will never get that chance to love you, to be with you, to laugh with you and share the moments both good and bad with you. But not a day goes by where I don't think of you. Your Always on my Mind. Honey I miss you so much, some people think I'm weird, other's think it's sad and pathetic that I love a man this much. I can't help the way I feel when it comes to you.

You have helped me through more than you know, you make me feel alive and safe. Your the only singer in my lifetime I've listened to interviews and watched movies/TV specials, of when I feel like I need someone. Someone who will give me extra comfort (Except Jesus). You give me confidence to be who I want to be, and baby let me tell you I miss you with all my heart.

I know we never met but in another time period I'm sure we have. I'm sure we were together, which is why I feel so strongly about you now. I just know we would have gotten along well. We are both deep thinkers, have an odd sense of humor, but always put other's first, we have an undeniable faith in Jesus which I believe we could connect on, on so many levels. I believe we would have been so well suited.

I feel I know you so well, like I know your likes and dislikes, I know how you work, how your brain works. Your thought processes and your trigger points. Elvis we've both been through so much in life, and it hasn't always treated us the kindest but....for me considering you never knew I existed, I find that you help to fill something inside of me I didn't know was there. You've helped me to discover a part of me I didn't realize was there.

Anyone who knows me well enough knows only a bit of the love I have for you. They don't know the thoughts I have, or the fact that some nights I ball my eyes out over you. How I miss you and never knew you, how I wish I did. How much I love you with all my heart. The way you make me feel is unlike no other. I am officially ruined for any other man that may come into my life.

I have dreaded this day for a long time now, last year was hard but since I have come to know you more intimately this year through what I'm sure would have taken other people decades to find out, my heart aches for you. I want you, I need you, I love you baby. More than any words could ever have the capacity to express. I want to be there for you, to help you, to hold you when you cry, to love you, to laugh with you at all your silly little jokes (including the inappropriate ones), to be that listening ear, to give you the pearls of wisdom you ask for or simply just to be there while you rant and yell.

I've often wandered what would/could have happened had I lived in that time and gotten to know you, whether that be as a friend or a significant other. Would I have made a change to the life you ended up having? I know others tried to help you but....I don't want this to sound selfish at all because that's not my intention but...could I have been the one to persuade you that drugs weren't the way to go? We'll never know.

I genuinely feel I know you so well no matter how crazy and psychotic that may sound. My darling Elvis you mean so much to me and no one will ever be able to understand that. No one. You just mean the world to me. I blame the Colonel for a lot of things when it comes to you, but it's not about that. Today is about celebrating your memory, your generosity, but above all your dedication and willingness to give your all to your fans every single time.

You loved your fans like they were your family, one time a guy came and pulled your jacket off you while you were walking down the street and you just turned around unfazed and yelled "You can have that, you put it on my back!" that's just the kind of person you were. Generous beyond measure.

You had your flaws but you were human. Everyone does. Everyone sins, and no one is perfect. I love you my darling and while I could go on forever and ever about how much you mean to me, and the way you make me feel I better stop here because I don't want to put anyone including you to sleep so, one last time...

My darling I love you so much, you mean everything to me, and I'm so grateful and thankful to have you apart of my life. Even if I have to imagine what you'd say to me when I'm ranting about something to you, or when I'm excited talking to your pictures on my walls or crying in the books I have about you, or even as simple as listening to your records especially the later ones and crying. The early ones I smile and feel happy and excited, 60s make me happy and sad because I know how unhappy you were in most of them, early 70s-75 you seemed happier and then the later years hit.

Now I'm not saying it was bad at all, because your voice never failed you. I love the story about the fact that on your last concert on June 26th 1977 you prayed to God asking him to give you the performance of a life time, and to feed his power through you, and guess what baby...it did. Even 46 years later it is considered as one of your best performances ever. You did it baby! You went through a lot in life with love, pills, grief, but baby you stayed strong throughout it all...God just realized how tired you were and brought you up to him so you could receive the peace and rest you so desperately needed. He saw your pain, your unhappiness, the weight of the world on your shoulders and he knew it was time for you to rest.

So baby I'll stop rambling but I can't wait to see you in Heaven, to meet you, to dance with you, to talk to you, to have a good time in general. Know you always have my love. Forever and Always.

I love you baby with all my heart. Always have always will.

Thankyou....just for being you. Your light will never dim.

TCB baby...."TCB in a flash"

Love you baby.

Yours forever,

Your darling.

[wildestflowrs]

🌟Ronancetober Day 14: Heaven and Hell🥀

Heaven and Hell (couldn’t keep us apart)

“What’s that do?”

Nancy shoots a glare at the angel peering over her shoulder. She rolls her eyes. “It’s an advanced displaced-soul detection device,” she explains disinterestedly, trying to ignore the angel’s rambling and focus on the job they’re both meant to be doing.

“Woah, I didn’t realise you guys had all this hi-tech stuff, like I thought you used demon spells and stuff, but I suppose that’s a little outdated. Hey, do you guys still use magic regularly or like has it died out for some of you yet because like I know this guy, Keith, who didn’t practice divine magic for so long that he can’t do it any more; it’s kinda pathetic. I mean, he could probably relearn-“

Ugh, working with angels is the worst. Nancy walks ahead through the forest, waving the device around and searching. It looks like a small scroll, but when unraveled it reveals a translucent pearly screen of infernal perception that allows the user to see displaced souls, even those hidden under the guise of a mortal or invisibility.

“-This is only like, my second field assignment ever though, unless you count that one with Steve where we had to retrieve a soul that sneaked out back to the mortal plane and was causing havoc, then that makes this-“

“Could you please be quiet, for heaven’s sake,” Nancy snaps, and the angel purses her lips. Nancy continues, “what exactly are you meant to be doing again? Because I’m quite capable of doing this assignment alone, especially without the help of some chatty angel,”

There’s a few moments of silence between them, and Nancy’s relived; until the angel bursts out laughing.

“Oh my, ‘for heaven’s sake’, cause you’re a demon! That’s good! Gosh, I didn’t realise you hell folk had such a sense of humor,”

This is going to be a long assignment.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

When Robin was informed she was being assigned for a field assignment with a demon, she was nervous. In her relatively short time as an angel, she’s hardly been back to the mortal plane since her death some 200 years ago. In fact, she will never admit it aloud, but she more or less avoided returning; in the months and years after her death, she felt empty existing forever in heaven, with no goals to achieve, no need to do as much as you could because there was no end; not until you served dutifully as an angel for many years, and you were able to request to move on, beyond existence. The thought of returning to the mortal plane brought her nothing but longing and despair; that she could no-longer participate in the fast-paced, messy life of a living person.

She’s still very much anxious when she gets to Earth, though the appearance of her demon companion- whom she has been assigned to accompany for the duration of their task - soothes her ever so slightly. She’s never met a demon before, she’s never been to hell, but she finds her quite beautiful. Ironically, the best way she could describe her appearance is angelic, with soft features that were flourished with sharpness, like the gentle shape of her face honed by her jawline. She’s completely gorgeous, despite the scowl that adorns her face and the smart maroon suit she wears.

“Who are you?”

Robin fumbles over her words, “Hi- wait sorry- uh- hello? I’m Robin, yeah, I’m Robin,”

The demon raises an eyebrow, but still offers her hand out to Robin, “Nancy Wheeler, representative from the fifth ring of hell,” Robin shakes her hand, perhaps a little too enthusiastically, and the demon looks at her; concentrating, as if trying to figure her out.

“Oh, right, sorry let me try again,” Robin clears her throat. “Robin Buckley, representative of the third sphere of heaven,” She smiles at Nancy, who doesn’t reciprocate the gesture and continues to visually study Robin.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Nancy thinks it’s pretty safe to say the past three hours have been the most insufferable thing she’s experienced for a while - and that’s coming from an inhabitant of hell for over 2,500 years.

She’s not used to so much talking, especially polite, non-aggressive talking. She definitely hates it; there’s no chance she’s beginning to become fond of the talkative, annoying, angel. She certainly hates her smart beige pants and puffy blouse that has the top few buttons undone, displaying the angel’s collection of magical necklaces. There’s nothing that draws her to the angel at all.

“Do you reflect on how you died very often? I do, I suppose, but most other people I know say not to? Which is stupid because surely in the afterlife we’re meant to reflect upon our lives and deaths before this, right? Isn’t that what afterlife is all abou-”

Nancy continues to hold the device in front of her, getting nothing until a flash of blue light appears on the screen and something rustles in the bushes ahead of them.

“Shh,” Nancy presses a finger to Robin’s lips as she is still looming just behind her left shoulder.

There’s another rustle, and a clicking growl, low and monstrous. Nancy is about to retrieve her sword from its sheath when Robin springs into action.

She quickly steps forward, creating a circle of golden light the diameter of her forearm in front of them, hands twisting and waving as she writes symbols within the circle. “We can’t fight it if we can’t see it,” she says, before waving once more and sending the circle flying forward, dispersing into shimmering dust-like particles; revealing the beast before them.

Nancy has recovered displaced souls before; they’re usually souls of mortals who were reluctant to move to their afterlife, or who had gotten lost on their way to the afterlife, so she would bring them down to where they belonged. Most resist - who wouldn’t when being sentenced to eternal punishment and suffering - but it is easy enough to restrain them; she’s a powerful demon in her own right.

If left un-recovered for too long, displaces souls begin to mutate and evolve into something less humanoid, the longer the period of time, the more mutated they become. Nancy’s aware of this, but she keeps on top of her assignments and has only dealt with a few mutated souls.

This soul, however, is like nothing she’s seen before.

It’s tall, at least eight or nine feet, towering over Nancy and her taller angel companion, with grotesque greyish skin that clings tight to the creature, making a clear outline of it’s skeletal frame and sharp, bony claws that are as big as Nancy’s head. Worst of all is it’s head; it has no facial features, only a blank head, until it screeches at them, opening up it’s face like a blooming flower to reveal hundreds of teeth and a gaping, cavernous mouth.

She’s seen her fair share of… unsightly things in hell, and she gathers Robin has as well; angels and demons alike are known for not being able to appear before mortals in their true form, needing to assume a simpler form as to not kill them instantly, but seeing a soul of a mortal like this… it’s unsettling.

The soul crouches down slightly, preparing to lurch towards the angel and demon. Nancy draw her sword and Robin prepares another spell circle, sharing a focused look.

“Let’s fucking get this thing,” the angel grins, and Nancy can’t help the blush that rises in her cheeks.

“Oh, fuck yeah,”

——————————————————

Lil bit of an author’s note but I really enjoyed writing this like I had no ideas at first but then I just ran with this like omg

I’d love to expand more on like my thoughts about this universe and like how/why Nancy and Robin ended up where they are in the afterlife?? Plus bringing Max and the other kids into this because funnn

[cdyssey]

Hacks (1.09) Reactions:

I thought it’d be fun to do half incoherent write ups for the s1 finale episodes ☺️

Ava lying about a doctor’s appointment to catch her flight… this is not gonna end well. 😭😭

“But do me a favor. Will you stay off WebMD? It’s bad for your personality.” This is the fucking funniest show.

“Great. Love you, bye!” And Deborah looks up and stares at Ava as she runs off. Oh, my fucking godddd. The first “I love you” between them and it’s so beautifully casual, like it’s something that Ava has said to her a thousand times before.

Deb at Marty about embarrassing herself: “Oh, well, thanks for looking out for me, you condescending piece of shit.” get his ass!!!

They did a really job of casting Ruby. There’s a lot of chemistry between her and Ava. You can sense the history between them.

Deb so nervous and worked up about the new set that she hasn’t eaten. ;w;

Ruby notices that something is different about Ava, and Ava says she’s happy.

Ooough, Ava being caught by the subletter, and Marcus is on the other end of the line. Jesus, this isn’t gonna be good.

“His job is just a series of high-cholesterol lunches.” FJSKSKSSN

Now’s as good as of a time as any to mention this—this season has done a remarkable job of showing the subtle tensions between Deborah’s various employees. There was Damien and Josefina in the kitchen during DJ’s party. And slowly but surely, we’ve watched Marcus grow increasingly discomfited at possibly being edged out by Ava.

Like their ambitious boss, they’re all jostling for their positions in the hierarchy—to be number one, to be the person Deborah relies on. Jealousies emerge, and that feels so real and painful and human.

Ava walking with so much confidence to her interview is nice. Such a huge change from her pathetic loser girl status at the start of the season fjskjdmsks.

Deb wanting Ava to come over now, and Ava making up a lie about bloodwork. Girllllll.

“You’ve been through way worse than silence, Deborah.” 😭

Ava: “Trust me.” / Deborah: “Okay, okay. I do.” Sobbing. OH, GOD, and this on the heels of Marcus questioning Ava’s trustworthiness.

MARCUS TRYING TO SABOTAGE WOWWW. OH, GOD. MY GUT IS HURTING. I LOVE ALL OF THESE CHARACTERS SM

“Okay, I’m getting my pussy waxed.” ALALWOQOFODKSKSOQA

Oh, jesus christ. The interviewers reveal the subject of the show, and Ava’s face immediately falls, and she’s immediately defensive because she’s gotten to KNOW Deb.

And she’s not a “crazy bitch.”

She’s someone that she loves.

And so she blows up this job to defend Deborah, even though Deborah is about to fucking find out that she was in LA in the first place. My Stomach is in Knots.

Ava tripping and her diva cup falling out of her bag after she tries to power walk away is perfect. Yeah

DON’T ANSWER THE JIMMY CALL NO

I’M SICK

FUCKING SICK

the heaviness in Deborah’s face. She trusted Ava, and trust does not come easily to her at all

“Actually, you made light of my dandruff problem and told me to fuck off, so we really don’t have to go there.” ALALAOSJSK

“And when you share a sense of humor with someone, it’s like finding someone who speaks your own, you know, private little language. And you make each other better. But his ambition got in the way, and he left me, and I was so scared because I thought I needed someone else and that I would never find anyone like him ever again.” HACKS WRITERS, GO SIT IN THE CORNER AND THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU’VE DONE.

SHE’S TALKING ABOUT HER EX-HUSBAND AND CLEARLY THINKING ABOUT AVA

Stand-up not being scary to Deb because no one can disappoint her. :((

“Isn’t that a little lonely, though?” / “It’s just true.”

FUCK ME

I’M SO???

I’M

Deborah in the kitchen, her apron bloodied, as she filets a fish… and it takes you back to earlier in the season as she fishes quietly on the pier while Ava watches her late night show. And that moment was important because it was the first time Ava really connected to Deborah’s humor, when she discovered that Deborah makes her laugh.

Goddamn.

(Also, something, something about Deb having a lot of practical skills that I really appreciate—fishing, cooking, etc. it would have been super easy to make her helpless about those sorts of things, but giving her that touch of competence helps to ground her, I think. Makes her feel more real.)

Deb pretending like everything is okay, and Ava continuing to lie—god god god—while Marcus is surprised to see Ava still by Deb’s side in the kitchen. So many unspoken dynamics and tensions here.

Deborah’s hatchet comes down SO hard, and it’s silent condemnation.

It’s a taste of what’s to come for what can only be a fraught and emotionally painful finale.

FUCK ME, this show is good

[pinkrabit]

Episode 2 of ATLA LA

THERES MY BOY ZUKO’S EXPLOSIVE RAGE

"He's a coward!" That's part of his character arc, Zuko. Just like yours I'd growing hair.

"[Before] you kill someone?" And then Aangs sigh of grief feels so on brand.

Also, aang, baby, I know you want to avenge your family but you have to know you are allowed to be a child. Even in war.

"Idk about you, but I can't go back" paralleled with "No! I will never turn my back on people that need me!" (Painted Lady)

Gran Gran giving Katara the scroll instead is such a nice touch. Because Gran Gran was always proud of her "little waterbender."

I still hope Katara steals a scroll though. It feels important to her character. Where she feels she's right, beyond logic or practicality. But she morally feels in the right. Which we see her demonstrating a lot in the original series.

Aang's apology to gyatso 🥺

"I bet you taste like chicken." Sokka. I don't think there's chicken in the poles.

Zuko raging at his Uncle trolling him is perfect. And then him bringing in logic/his "General" ideology.

Zuko doesn't have tact Iroh.

IROH GETTING OFF TASK FOR FOOD IS SO ON BRAND

LADIES WITH MURDER FANS

Suki, my love

The wariness of the Kyoshi Island leader seems genuine to the original source

"I know I don't belong here. Thats something I've been feeling a lot lately."

"If I can learn to be the Avatar, maybe I can bring the place I knew, a world where people are happier, back."

I truly think Aangs actor has nailed his character. It feels so genuine and accurate.

Kyoshi didn't benefit from the kindness of strangers, she terrified them if I remmeber correctly.

SOKKA, STOP TRYING TO GET PUSSY.

Him stumbling because of a pretty girl omg.

Aang laughing at Sokka. Yes, he's a little more serious, but are we all watching the same show???? He still has a sense of humor, he's still a little shit <3

Sokka covering himself like a blushing maiden, omg

Aang is such an optimistic. "It's more than you knew before, though, right?"

Yes, Katara! Tell him he can't avoid the responsibility. "We're not going anywhere. "

AND THEN THE TARGET PRACTICE

My sweet children.

Sokka is unimpressed with bending. Since 2005.

Katara saying he'll save the world by making connections. Because it's true. We learn throughout the original series that there's good and bad everywhere. Primarily, because of Aang connecting with others.

Zuko’s crew dissapointing him 20 years ago, and now.

Suki's stealth feels like a nice touch. Pretty girl just shows up all the time.

WHERE ARE SOKKA'S CHARACTER FLAWS

At least he seems a little arrogant and tooting his own horn too much.

He might not be sexist, but his masculinity is still fragile in the first half. Feels important to acknowledge that.

Humble that man Suki. Thank you.

HE STORMS OFF! What a little bitch. Love him. He's so pathetic.

Aang terrified of hurting people, and seeming so hurt by people being afraid of him. The doubt!

"How many people will I hurt??"

My boy, this is war. You can do it. You have so much to learn.

Sokka. I expect an apology and DRAG.

Sokka loves getting beat up by women.

Ew. Wait. Why is fighting always so flirty.

Aangs inner turmoil. Aang asking for help.

Here comes the SPIRIT REALM. NO TOILETS, ONLY SPIRITS.

"There's a lot you don't know." No shit, Kyoshi.

Zuko having a reflection about his banishment paired with, "Sometimes hope can be a cruel thing."

Solka is so enamored about being tackled.

WHERE IS THE KYOSHI DRAG

Suki taking off her makeup and armor, potentially symbolizing her showing herself to sokka as a girl not a soldier. Showing her insecurities, allowing her vulnerability.

Aang, now is not the time to talk with your former life.

Kyoshi mentioning roles of the avatar without including, "human," "friend," feels so intentional. Because Aang just wants to be human. He just wants to be himself, but the Avatar cannot afford that.

The pai sho anecdote, omg

Strong leader leady!!! What a bad bitch.

ZUKO IF YOU HURT KATARA I SWEAR TO AGNI

Katara double checking on Aang before going to fight on Kyoshi in the LA vs thr North Pole.

"But, what if I hurt someone along the way??" Poor airbender just wants to live a peaceful life. My boy, it's not your fault. You were born too late. However, you are the only one to fix this.

"Being the Avatar means putting your duties above all else. Even your life!"

Kyoshi. He's 12. He just woke up. Aang needs an adult. Aang needs a protector. In the animation and LA. Katara. Your role in his life is this. Protect his gentle spirit.

SOKKA USING THE FAN

BUT WHERE IS THE DRAG

Katara. Honey. You can't fight a small army.

I love seeing her PTSD being accentuated in the LA is so amazing.

Avatar shape shifting carries from animation to LA I see. Does this count as drag? You think Aang identifies as genderfluid?

Aang is constantly fainting. He's always confused but rolling with it. He always feels guilty. He NEEDS love.

"..a reason to believe again.."

YES

Give aang recognition and respect despite his mistakes and flaws. He's a child and he's doing great, for all that he is.

"Thank you.. for bringing the world to me."

I can accept the lack of drag if I see Sokka fighting like a Kyoshi Warrior with a murder fan.

Kyoshi = Scary Lady

"Don't worry, kid. You don't have to do this alone."

Such a pissing match between Zuko and Zhao.

Sokka feels okay, a little bland. Zuko’s character needs to be more dramatic. Once again, Aang's character feels amazing.

Aang this episode has had to come to terms with the idea that his life is not his own. His right to live is a privilege. His existence is transactional. And he will never know the peace he craves for long intervals.