#i only got one new dialogue from him with six hearts but it's bc i

[specialbluehens]

new dialogue from shane after reaching eight hearts with him

^ this was after i gave him a bouquet. maybe he's always said it but i didn't recognize it so!!!

:')

[craigboobe]

what if 😳🙈 we kissed 😘😝 at dinky the dinosaur 🐊 😳 (and we're both sillaaayyy)

this pic i dhsjejjwjej

[pennylanewrites]

chapter 1 ※ why won’t you love me?

playlist: spotify link

pairings: eren yeager x fem!reader, eren x mikasa

genre: angst, smut

word count: 3.1k

cw: marijuana use, eren and reader are complete assholes, infidelity, semi-public oral(f.receiving), unprotected sex, mentions of pregnancy, a lot of dialogue

a/n: hiiii! this is the first chapter of my eren series, the fic title and the chapters’ titles are all 5sos lyrics bc if you didn’t know, i have to include 5sos in everything <33 enjoy and let me know if you want to be added to the taglist for upcoming chapters <33

part two // back to masterlist

Your hand fell on the mattress, on top of Spiderman sheets that used to always make you chuckle. Now they just left a bittersweet memory of their owner. You thought you'd meet another open palm, but the weight on the right side of the bed shifted until it was off completely. Turning to face the wall, you shut your eyes and wrapped your arms around your naked torso.

The sound of footsteps on carpet, the flick of a lighter, a cloud of smoke. A pair of tattooed, rough arms around you.

"Don't fall asleep here."

You sighed and pushed the man off of you, rolling to the side of the bed to retrieve your tossed clothes. An index finger tapped your shoulder, making you flinch. You shrugged him off and got dressed quickly, despite your sore legs.

"Is she coming over?"

"What? Oh, huh- yeah."

"You should change your sheets then." He looked back at his bed, chuckling at a small pool of liquid that was slowly drying off. "Eren?" You called his name from the door of his bedroom.

"Yes, baby?" Your heart ached at the nickname he gave you as his piercing jade gaze fell on your face. Bottom lip trembling, eyes watering; just like everytime you left the apartment that you sneaked into through the emergency ladder.

"This was the last time."

"I know."

You both knew it wasn't the last time. Maybe Eren was more sure than you were, his slight grin giving him away, but after all, you always came back to him. Every time faster than the one before.

This time it was no less than five hours, no more than six. Connie and Sasha's party made it impossible for your paths not to cross; and it didn't really help either that you and Eren had been best friends since the moment you were born.

Eren, Armin, Mikasa and you. Always together, never apart for too long. From your parents teasing you and Eren that you'll marry, to forming a sibling bond in elementary, to finally realizing he's a boy in middle school. The only issue there was that Mikasa had realized that too. She beat you to confessing, on your high school graduation day, her and Eren made it official quickly; maybe too quick. Because what Mikasa didn't know -and Armin suspected- was that you and Eren had shared innocent kisses, one too many make-out sessions that ended with promises to be best friends forever.

Best friends became friends, then acquaintances, then friends again. Then, on New Years Eve, three years after Eren and Mikasa got together, Eren came knocking on your door, crying in your arms about her, about their relationship, his feelings. His feelings about you. And then you were kissing him. And the new year found you lain in bed together, a blanket covering your tangled bodies, along with a horrible, ugly and raw disgust. For yourself, and for him. How could you do this to your best friends, how could he do this to his girlfriend?

“You there?” Eren snapped his fingers in front of your face. Your eyes fixated on the bottom of your empty cup before it disappeared from your hold. “Want a refill?” The next thing he stole from you was the joint that was stuck between your lips, the clear lipgloss leaving a mark around the filter.

You tilted your head to the side to finally look at him for the first time since you left his apartment that morning. The first thing your eyes fell on was your old heart-shaped locket hanging from a gold chain around his neck. You wondered if Mikasa knew there was a picture of you and him inside. Looking up, you fought the urge to move a strand of hair behind his pierced ear. His jade eyes searched for yours, but they were locked on Mikasa’s red scrunchy that held his hair in a messy bun.

“Mikasa was looking for you.” You announced and, taking your red solo cup back got up from the couch, heading for the kitchen before Sasha stopped you.

“Some of us are gonna play seven minutes in heaven!” She said excitedly and dragged you with her.

“Oh, I was about to leave.”

“Nonsense! Tell her to stay, Mikasa!”

“Eren will take you home later, come sit!” Mikasa and Sasha took your hands and seated you on the floor, them on either side of you. You tried to ignore Eren’s stare and opted for watching Connie place an empty wine bottle in the middle of the circle instead.

“Okay, who’s starting?” Jean looked around and you noticed the hopeful look he gave Marco across from him, but Sasha was faster, like a lion ready to attack her prey.

“Me, me!” Sasha extended her hands and twisted the glass bottle. Everyone’s drunk gazes watched it turn and turn until the bottom stopped on you. You already knew who the top side of the bottle stopped on, and you turned to Mikasa with wide eyes.

“No fair, Yeager has a girlfriend already!”

“It’s just a game, right babe?” Eren made sure to lean over and peck his girlfriend’s red lips before getting up.

“Yeah. Of course, we won’t do anything, don’t worry.” You whispered to your friend before following Eren upstairs. You wished you hadn’t looked behind you at Mikasa, how she drew her bottom lip between her teeth like she always did when she was nervous.

You recognized the room you stepped in as Connie’s. Eren fell on the bed, a joint still attached to his lips, and his hands dragging you with him.

“Eren, stop it.” You whined, but not once did you try to wiggle your way out of his grip. Such a hypocrite, you thought.

“You look pretty tonight.” He smiled up at you before extending one of his hands to the ashtray on the nightstand to press the joint down on. His silver rings glistened in the moonlight coming from the window as he reached up to move a strand of your hair behind your ear.

“Stop.”

“Make me stop. We still have...six minutes and 12 seconds.”

“Eren, enough.”

“Baby, baby please. I want to make you feel as good as you look.” He flipped you around and pinned your hands on either side of your head before kissing you softly.

And you let him. Every time his lips fell on your skin, you convinced himself you’d stop him, but it was forgotten again once he flipped your skirt over and moved your panties to the side. And you let him use his fingers to make your breath hitch in your throat. You couldn’t do anything else but give yourself to Eren completely.

You wanted to think about the girl downstairs that thought of you and Eren as the best of friends, the girl you betrayed every single day for four months, ever since that New Year’s Eve you and Eren spent with each other.

“You’re so pretty. Your pussy is so pretty for me. My pussy.” He mumbled between soft kisses and licks on your clit. You arched your back off the bed, grinding on his face as the bed squeaked under you slightly. His teeth barely grazed your sweet spot to tease you before he started lapping at the juices that threatened to spill on the mattress and give your forbidden act away.

You promised yourself this was the last time as Eren moaned into your cunt desperately. His hands reached for yours on the sheets but they were preoccupied; Eren looked up with a cocky smile at the way you were shaking, only to see it was because you were sobbing into your palms.

“I’m so-”

“Don’t say anything, Eren, please.” You mumbled as he fixed your clothes. He kneeled on the floor next to your head and tried holding your hands, only to get pushed away.

“It hurts to see you cry, baby, I’m sorry. Baby,” Eren checked his phone. Exactly seven minutes, “baby it’s been seven minutes.”

“Tell them I was drunk and fell asleep.” you mumbled and turned your back to him, facing the wall instead. You felt a hand stroke your shoulder, a beam of light entered the room before it was gone as the door closed behind him.

It felt like years that you had been muffling your sobs in Connie's pillow when the door opened again.

"Hey, are you asleep?" You could recognize the sweet, melodic voice anywhere. It was Mikasa, and she was now sitting on the edge of the bed as you pretended to be dozing off. "You don't have to reply, I just want to say something." You wiped a stray tear and listened cautiously. Mikasa was slurring her words a bit, which for her meant she was more than drunk already.

"I think Eren is cheating on me."

"He wouldn't. Eren loves you more than anything." You smiled to the wall sadly, making shapes on the mattress with your index finger. Mikasa gasped; she wasn't expecting you to be awake, or reply.

"Do you think I'm making a mistake being with him still?"

Yes. Yes, a huge mistake. You should leave him, he's not worth your time, Mikasa. You deserve better, someone that will always treat you right.

"It's worth another try, don't you think?" You said instead, knowing it's what your friend needed to hear. As for Eren, he was standing by the closed door, listening closely to your conversation; how Mikasa chuckled, how your voice was shaky and uncontrolled. When it came to Mikasa's question, he found himself scared you would have had enough and finally admit to everything. A sense of relief washed over him, but why did he also feel almost...mad at you?

"Sorry for interrupting, I started the car."

"Oh, okay. __, are you coming? Eren can drop you off." Mikasa offered you a hand, but you got up after denying it.

"I'll leave with Armin." Mikasa nodded and left, Eren mumbling something about 'be right there'.

"I'll come by your place later." Eren wrapped his arms around your neck and kissed your forehead softly. Your hands met his torso and pushed him away, taking a step back.

"Please, Eren..."

"See you!" He waved and left quickly, before you could say anything, because Eren knew you would tell him to fuck off and stay with his girlfriend. But that was the last thing he wanted to do.

     Hours later, as the clock struck four in the morning, you heard the front door click open. You didn't have the strength to see him, touch him, hold him. All you wanted was for Eren to disappear from your life, for you to only know him as Mikasa's boyfriend.

"Baby, are you asleep?" You heard a whisper and a drawer open; he was putting on his pajamas. You shut your eyes and pretended he wasn't there, that it was a dream, a nightmare even.

"I missed you so much. So, so much. You were so pretty tonight, did I tell you?" He mumbled, leaving a trail of kisses from your neck down to your upper arm. You shifted on the mattress, pressing your face further against your pillow.

"I can't take it anymore, __. I want to be with you, to kiss you in front of our friends, to go on dates, make you my wife." A sob escaped his lips, and you thought he deserved to be so miserable. After all the pain he's put you and Mikasa in, he should spend the rest of his life crying. "Please talk to me, I know you're awake. I want to see your face. I love you, __.”

"Stop." You mumbled and covered your face with the blanket, wiping a new set of tears away. "Just stop! I can't stand you anymore!" Eren's arms wrapped tight around your waist, his breath hot on your neck; you had never felt so close to him, but you hated that it had to be that way. It was easier to ignore the pain when it was just sex. Sex that took the stress of the day away, that made you forget everything else. But now...what was this predicament you've fallen face first in?

"Mikasa was looking at engagement rings today, you know. And all I could think about was how they were going to look on your finger." He huffed and held your hand in his, caressing the empty space on your left ring finger.

"Why did it have to be you, Eren?"

You weren't expecting an answer. And Eren didn't give you one. His fingers fiddling with the material of your shirt, sneaking in to caress your stomach was enough.

"Do you want a family, __?"

"Maybe with the right person."

Did you mean him? Was that your way of asking him to leave her? Eren couldn't help but wonder, yet he was always one step behind; always wondering, never actually asking.

"What about you?"

"I do. I really do. I want a little girl that runs around the house and makes me play with her. She will have long, brown hair like me and it will flow behind her as she runs. And she has the prettiest eyes, your eyes, your smile. I hope when she laughs her nose shrinks up like yours does. God, that will be the prettiest girl in the world."

     You let him have his little fantasy as you sobbed into the pillow, you let him smile and chuckle into your hair as he thought of a happy family living in the countryside. And you let him because you knew it would only ever stay a fantasy.

     Shrugging his hand away, you rolled off the bed and sat on an armchair by the window. The street was so quiet, you swore your muffled sobs could be heard from the small opening of the window.

"We have to stop, Eren."

"No."

"This is the worst thing we could have ever done, it needs to be over."

"Is it so wrong to love each other?" He exclaimed, getting up and falling on his knees in front of you. You shook your head and looked away, tears making your sight blurry and shaky. You could feel his open palms over your own, his head on your chest to listen to your heartbeat.

"I don't love you." You admitted. But what a fat lie it was.

"Liar." He knew. Eren could see right through you and your white lies. He knew when you were faking a smile, when your head hurt, when your leg was sore, when you were happy or sad or angry. All he needed was to take one good look at you. And he knew everything.

"It's true."

"Look me in the eyes and say it. Say it! If you do, I'll go. I promise, I'll leave you alone, I'll go get the ring Mikasa wants, I'll make you her maid of honour."

     Jade eyes searching for yours. This time they finally met. A shaky breath left your lips, a sob escaped his.

"I don't love you." You spoke loud and clear. And he heard you. Oh, how beautiful your voice sounded even as the words you spoke were hurting him, very much so.

"You love me. More than anyone ever has. More than Mikasa ever will."

"That doesn't change anything, Eren."

"It changes everything!" He exclaimed, caressing your cheeks softly. "Don't you get it, __? I want to be with you for the rest of my life!"

"You need to break up with Mikasa. Tell her everything."

"I will. First thing tomorrow." He nodded and took your hands in his, bringing them to his wet cheeks. Trembling thumbs wiped tears off red cheeks before you fell on the floor, letting Eren engulf you in a hug. "Kiss me." He whispered and brought his lips against yours before you could refuse.

Next thing you knew, his arms were carrying you to the bed, caging you between them. He played with the hem of your shirt and you didn't have to wait any longer to know he wanted it off. So you obliged, like always. Anything Eren wanted, you gave to him. Such a selfless act, for such a selfish person.

     An hour later and you were still playing that game you knew by heart. You would give him everything he wanted, in return you got a crumble of love that should be given to Mikasa.

"I love you, I love you, my baby. My little baby, fuck-come for me please." Eren's hands intertwined with yours, pinning them over your head on the pillow and drilling into you fast. He was close too, he knew he was, but he wanted to cherish this moment. It felt like it would be the last one, it hurt like a breakup. And making love to the woman of your life shouldn't hurt. Tears threatened to escape his sapphire eyes as he leaned down to kiss you softly.

"Want to stay with you here forever. I want to make love to you everyday, baby please." He whimpered. You didn’t have the heart to reply to him, instead focusing on the euphoria you felt as he fucked you into the mattress.

“Eren, Eren!” You moaned his name, desperately holding onto the sound of it as you arched your back off the bed. You didn’t know when the next time you’ll be calling for him like that would be. And as you reached your orgasm, you hugged Eren and brought him down, not even a breath separating the two of you.

“You’re on birth control, right?” You nodded, and he gripped your jaw to kiss you again. With one last thrust, Eren painted your walls white with his cum, giving a few more slow rolls of his hips before pulling out.

And just like that, it felt like your life was over. You were drowning in a bottomless pit of sorrow, but Eren was still with you. He was in your bathroom, filling the tub with warm water. His clothes were on your floor, his spare ones in your drawer.

“I have to go home. Mikasa will come over for breakfast.” His apologetic eyes as he picked his clothes up made you scoff. You knew his promise of breaking up would end up untrue and Mikasa would be calling later to talk about how he surprised her with flowers and pancakes. And that she had no reason for worrying, because they were better than ever.

“Will you break up with her?” You called as he stood at the door.

“Soon.”

Yeah. Soon.

taglist: @chaotic-nick @arean @didiyogo @fuwushiguro

[weirdwyvern]

I don't go here but what is going on with these Pokemon twins. Is one of them dead or something. Is he in the shadow realms. Are they actually one person but split in half by accident. Are they okay.

anon I hope you're ready to read bc I'm unable to shut up

The most recent Pokémon game, Pokémon Legends: Arceus, is set in ancient Sinnoh, back when it was still known as Hisui. Players encounter a very surprising character in the form of Ingo, one of the Subway Bosses found in BW & BW2. The game leaves it ambiguous how he got to Hisui, as Ingo himself has lost most of his memories, but the main theories are that he either went through the space-time rift (like the player) or went through an Ultra Wormhole (which would explain the memory loss).

(Someone else made a better post about it BUT lowkey the meta reason that Ingo got sent back in time is bc the portion of the game he features in involves climbing up a mountain. His Japanese name is Nobori, and Japanese for "mountain climbing" is yama nobori. He got isekai'd for pun purposes.)

Anyway we're collectively losing our minds about this bc, unlike previous instances where a character got warped to a new place with no memories (like Annabelle), Ingo got yote into Hisui without his Pokémon and without Emmet, his younger twin brother. Separating the twins is already bad enough due to how much they complement one another in personality, but it's made worse by how the two of them are canonically very close. IIRC, Emmet has some dialogue in Pokémon Masters talking about how much he looks up to Ingo and describes them as each other's number #1 rivals (which is Significant for a guy so fixated on battling). Ingo meanwhile has dialogue in PLA describing his Chandelure and Emmet; he talks about how although he can't remember their names, some things live on in the heart no matter what.

Then there's the fact that Ingo can't just GO HOME, seeing as he's been warped to a completely different time period…not that he even knows where to go to begin with due to his memory issues. Plus, assuming Ingo doesn't go back to the present (or at least doesn't return at the same time), Ingo just straight-up vanished off the face of the earth. Emmet has no idea what's happened to him, and he has effectively no way of finding out what happened, either.

And hey! We don't know if this is ever gonna be resolved or if it's just gonna be, like, a one-off thing the Pokémon devs are never gonna address again. Maybe it'll be addressed in the anime? Who knows!

Aside from all the angst tho, it's also just. Really fucking funny. Ingo is JUST some guy from the Pokémon equivalent of NYC. He's a career trainer that got yote into ancient Sinnoh before battling was even mainstream in the region, back when people were still pretty wary of Pokémon and when carrying a full team of six was considered borderline impossible. Not only does he eventually gets a full team of six, but he goes on to get a full team of alpha Pokémon (stronger, bigger, more terrifying) as well.

Also he got demuppetified + has "uncle who looks like he's constantly beset by demons but is always very polite n friendly" vibes now

[ikusayu-no-hana]

kiden!! act i

first off. I watched kiden with the most kasen-biased lens, and even after like 6ish rewatches there are things I might have missed out. second, this is long. hehe. so that's a much needed disclaimer before I unload everything I've been thinking of for the past few weeks.

ofc......this is an abandoned timeline. even so, the only flowers that bloom are those near gracia.

Kokin’s shriek thank you very very very much

they skip half of the plotline of iden and straight away make it clear that everyone knows who the touken danshi are . and the fact that they know they are living in an abandoned timeline. no existential conflicts here?

takayama ukon, I think, as far as I can remember, is the first sute human ive seen that justifies not killing the touken danshi on the basis that they have the same hearts as humans, and are not mere objects. He’s so emptathetic towards them it almost makes me uncomfortable bc well….we know whats going to happen in the end .

jizou running away with gracia is the softest portrayal of a touken danshi denying his duty we’ve ever seen. maybe its the hand holding, treating gracia like she’s fragile.

Urghrjdnf I know it’s a world that came into existence from gracia’s wish but hearing don francisco say “what if we let her be free?” leaves a bad bad taste in my mouth. Sure it may be what she wanted but does she anymore? Isn’t she already supposed to be free in this new world? But then again, would her happiness ultimately lie in her husband living like a depraved madman…..? debatable.

i feel terrible for the honmaru that lost their daisanbutai...all six swords broken in one investigation....*logs in to my honmaru to poke all six of them to make sure theyre ok*

Kokin’s message…

Always always alwaysssssss mouthing the opening dialogue…fuck ive been waiting to hear it in kasens voice forever and ever.

why is kasen so beautiful. like. they really set his wig and did his makeup to make him look divine, like one of those sad noh maidens (thoughts on the op here)

(A bit of an aside, but I find it funny how some of them still have flower petals on their costumes www. Chougi looking fully serious while having a petal lodged in his cape as if just seconds earlier he wasnt dancing. and shishiou scattering petals in his wake as he runs.)

SITTING AROUND A FIRE HOW CUTE. i forgot that this scene in almost its entirety was also in kahakugeki, because this time it’s a completely different setting and theyre doing something other than walking. this feels more lively :)

they discuss a little poetry! specifically the poem kokindenjunotachi recites in the incoming call. kidengumi poetry discussion session in full swing! i still am surprised to find out shishiou also liked poetry bc his former master was an accomplished poet, and also that chougi and nikkari are well-read in old literature. I wonder if that was their own acquired knowledge or from kasen's influence.

feels like everyone has an appreciation (or at least, an understanding) of the arts that kasen likes ("please group me with people who understand elegance").

kasen voice: in most cases the 'uta' you're talking about is not the 'uta' I'm familiar with! (he mustve heard a lot of kotegiri's songs already.)

kikkou truly must be a good cook if kasen is relishing the food he made........mmmm watching them made me a little hungry ngl

who's the sender of the message??? does kasen know????

"well I do have a feeling of who it might be–"

"one of your old friends, perhaps?"

I love how kasen and nikkari have this exchange between them, where nikkari consistently sees right through kasen and his discomfort and frankly cuts right to the point. nikkari’s role here is to act as a foil of sorts to kasen.

I feel like. kotegiri and shishiou bring the much needed light-heartedness to this unit. tsurumaru, koga, mutsu and horikawa did that in iden but in kiden we’ve got like. more somber characters havent we. like seriously in any other setting I wouldnt imagine characters like kasen and nikkari doing an enthusiastic group shout . (kikkou looks at chougi bc hes the only one not doing it lol. and i think nikkari also gestures to chougi to go along w it

so the farmers mention that katō kiyomasa was defeated and bc of that the christians made kumamoto-jo their hideout. looked him up and....this guy was absolutely brutal towards them....stabbing pregnant christian women and cutting off their children's heads. making kumamoto castle a christian place feels like the ultimate fuck you to kato kiyomasa.

seeing kasen give out instructions feels so..........and everyone looking at him. thats his unit. thats his daisanbutai. thats their captain. and hes such a trustworthy captain <3

the reason why nikkari’s so set on poking kasen about his ‘mukashinajimi’ is definitely bc kasen is mysteriously reluctant about to bring it up (shinpaishite iru yo). in kahakugeki kasen begins to say kokindenjunotachi’s name in the first scene when nikkari cuts in and i wish theyd have kept that little bit in kiden. i think kasen......definitely didnt want to face his past. ive said enough abt that in well...a lot of posts. but also, i think he was also a little fearfulof what meeting old friends would mean. itd be too many coincidences, wouldnt it

it just occurred to me that tadaoki, most definitely, like in giden, thought kasen was a geisha just standing in the middle of his way. just like that. thats why hes like ???????????

oh man. kasen. it mustve fucked him up to see tadaoki like that. i feel like having watched kahakugeki took a little shock out of it bc we all expected it, but it really mustve been a massive shocker and eye opener to kasen to see what a fully christian country entailed. (if gracias wish hadnt come true tadaoki wouldnt have to suffer like this would he...? but then neither wouldve been able to make the other happy if their repsective wishes came true) its jarring to see your father, who was once full of pride and one of the wealthiest lords in the country, fall to the bottom of the barrel.

obsessed with the way kasen shows his nervous tics: tucking his hair, tapping his sword, flourishing his cape. kuma does it all so naturally.

???? chougi smile out of nowhere???? i think he only did that in daisenshuuraku stream bc in 4/3 stream he didnt much smile at kikkou kjsndv thank you for that though

chougi and kikkou r literally . team rocket but more cunning and scheming. its like theyve already had experience in reconnaissance together.

if im not wrong kikkou says “even though it’s god’s country, there’s no equality among its citizens” yes king thats been the problem w christian kingdoms throughout history! *cough* europe *cough*

"bluffing is also a weapon of war" go kikkou go!!!!!!!!

i wouldnt want them as enemies ever theyre genuinely terrifyingly good at drawing out information. but also theyre just bluffing it as they go huh lol

still, its impressive they came up with all that on the spot.

DEATH BY KIKKOUS WHISTLE

jk rowling wishes she couldve made draco malfunction as sexy and ruthless as chougi

MAN THEYRE SO ANNOYING D SJKNDV everyone whispering "hidari! hidari!!!!!!" but he still gets slapped. imagine ur just here to protect ur religious country and these meddling touken danshi LIE to ur face and give u weird riddles to solve and u still get clocked while the other guy is having the time of his life whistling at ur misfortune. and the blue cape guy tops it off with “i have utmost respect for ur guys’ devotion to ur faith :)”

theyre so good. chemistry is out of this world. digging my grave as i speak

“where is she?!?!?!?!?” *stomach suddenly starts rumbling* sorry i know its like. a plot point to get tadaoki to where shishiou and kotegiri at the eatery but i couldnt stop laughing

i think its safe to say kiden part i is more of a comedy to a certain extent. to a certain extent only though.

kotegiri is so earnest and it feels like shishiou is his elder brother.

they finally got to sit at the same table T-T

i really like how the three sets of touken danshi move to different places to gather intel; kasen + nikkari going to the crowds near the castle to observe them (i loved the bgm here), chougi + kikkou slyly making their way to the church, shishiou + kote going to a restaurant. it feels characteristic to each of them.

that one guy inthe background doing a double take @ nue

shishiou talks to kogarasumaru a lot for a guy who claims to not like being treated like a kid hmmmmmmm admit u like being spoiled like the rest of us

also i wonder if shishiou simply didnt ask kogarasumaru for an explanation or if kogarasumaru didnt go into too many details or if shishiou simply forgot about what the former meant by a ‘troublesome’ mission. he may be a himbo

nveeeveerrrrrr getting tired of shishious koga impression. ever

and his smile while talking about his jicchan....... :D

shishious the kind of friend that has No Shame and No Reluctance to be full on weird in public settings and honestly good for him ! (kotegiri nodding to the other people in the restaurant wwww like yeah excuse us, im sorry)

shishiou knows archery confirmed.

he’s the first one to sense that the ‘humans’ arent actually humans. its his innate sense isnt it? he’s more knowledgeable than he lets everyone else in on.

i love how theyre all told gracia was taken by a touken danshi but they dont suspect the other members

honestly i dont want to delve too much into the historical figures bc that would make this post longer than i think its goign to turn out :(

kotegiri’s wavering confusion at the sight of tadaoki........i love how touken danshi retain their former master’s bonds and feelings toward the people in their lives. in a rudimentary sort of way kote must have felt like he was looking at his father.

well. can you really blame tadaoki for wanting to kill gracia? actually no this isnt really a story about who bears the blame. if you try to search for moral validity in this play youre going to spend eternity here. its simply a story about desire. in kidens case, gracia gaining something meant making tadaoki lose something, namely his wealth, title, lands, perhaps even sanity. and because of that he hates her. but because of his memories he also loves her. and thats the central conflict of his character.

like ive always thought: in tkrb there is rarely black and white morality, what they define as ‘good’ or ‘bad’ depends upon whether they can carry out their orders and protect history, and thats also apparent in a few later scenes. its the fact that the swords are drawn from so many different stories (+ also the fact that modern morality has no business being applied to the people of yore. also re: the oda swords’ different views on oda nobunaga. hasebe hates the way he did things, but yagen thinks it was fitting for a man of that period) ok ive derailed enough lets go back to the play !

ofc kote follows after tadaoki,,,,,,,,

right before meeting him, a strong wind blows over kasen and nikkari . personally i think that “wind” that notoriously blows in some scenes is a sort of euphemism for kokindenjunotachi -> in the keichou kumamoto chousa in the game he tells us to call him kaze at first. ofc, this is just a speculation but it ties in with later scenes too so bear w me

i love how kokin straight up lies to them ‘i called you so we could recite poems’ kasen is right to see through his bullshit jkdsnvjk. still, i think kokin was sly to have waited until he was sure they were trustworthy and strong enough to handle the mission to formally tell them the details of what happened.

this little exchange between kokin and kasen is my favourite bc it says a lot without many words. its almost like a fight between siblings but not exactly, kokin has this emotional distance that kasen cant get through to. id liken it more to a father-and-son thing. the son never being able to understand his father is such a famous trope isnt it? thats whats happening here. kokin’s got something up his sleeve and kasen is dissatisfied bc he cant guess what it is and why kokin’s keeping it from them.

>ikuzo, aoe. ah, yarou! killed me x2. two of my favourite swords interactignrgksndfjnvdfjnvkjnsd

this bgm slaps

low-level kokin ganbatte

NITOU KAIGAN LETS GOOOOO

ahhh canon that nikkari and kasen spar a lot!!

man kasen is so sarcastic . ‘have you lost your poetic spirit?’ bestie chill he’s doing his best at the level he’s on

NOW kokin trusts them after they rescue him. he suddenly goes all serious and then says those words like theyre coming from his heart.......in this investigation, he specifically asked for kasen didnt he? it wasnt like iden where hizen called for all competent touken danshi. i suppose that was part of his plan as well, to strengthen kasen (we dont get to know if like in iden, the saniwa deliberately also wanted kasen to grow. its simply not mentioned but the mission pays off doesnt it?). what a roundabout way to do it tho. though, kasen wouldve been petulant if he Knew what this investigation was meant to entail right from the start. thats why kokin couldnt fully go into the details right away.

:(((((((((((((((((((((((((((( gracia...........

‘why did that man order my death?’ god this reminds me of musou’s dainibutai’s chapter where kasen just. randomly asks ‘do you think tadaoki wanted gracia......dead?’ its so out of character bc he’s being vulnerable for the first time since the mission, and namazuo tells him ‘it doesnt matter how it happened, if someone precious dies, anyone’d be sad’ (paraphrased from the jp game i didnt play the en version dont tell me im wrong vdbjsndvkjdsfnvkj)

haraiso.......inferno.........they’ve read their dante alighieri

as far as i can make out the touken danshi that perished were......kashuu, yagen, ichigo, nihongou, horikawa, and izumi

AHHHHHHHHHHH jizou’s internal conflict AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

‘just like me, you’re also taken captive’ ah it strikes again, the fixed and unflexible nature of the touken danshi’s duty that is the root cause of all pain in tkrb.

this is so funny and cute awwwwwww. its so hard for jizou to comprehend human relationships. its easy to understand at a superficial level, but hard once you actually are a human. and thats what’s happening here: jizou is getting humanized.

oh jizous so cuteeeeeee

yeeeeee the table scene !!!!!!

i came to the stunning realization that this scene references the scene of The Last Supper. but ofc.......there are supposed to be 13 people in the painting, but ukon and yukinaga and gracia aren’t there. i initially thought gracia would be representative of jesus, but she’s betrayed them and run away right? jesus is the one that stayed and was killed. with that logic, it’s otomo sourin that’s symbolic of jesus since......well........he gets betrayed in the end. this is a table of traitors.

so i looked up what seisan meant and

oh my god it IS EXACTLY THE LAST SUPPER TOUSUTE DID IT DELIBERATELYYYYYYYY

ahhh i really love the proverb kikkou uses here: 郷に って は 郷に したがえ . i didnt get it immediately at first but i did get a sense of it being similar to ‘when in rome, do as the romans do.’ i love this kikkou’s characterization so much

otomo sourin feels like their babysitter rip

theyre so pretty I loved the set-up of this scene

this scene is significant in so many ways 1) we dont have enough scenes in tkrb where touken danshi are subtly given the position of unbending, ruthless, unnegotiable villains. 2) it reiterates what we already know: that protecting history is a touken danshi’s instinct. 3) it makes a distinction between the concepts of ‘instinct’ and ‘justice’ 4) kikkou likes to wave at people 5) chougi is the more passionate one, kikkou the cooler, level-headed one.

yoshitaka says that no one is in the wrong. hmmm

kotegiri’s face as tadaoki is denouncing tama 😭😭😭😭😭😭

  shishiou talking aboutkasen😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

even though he’s a government sword, kokin displays so much human emotion, wanting to save jizou even after they parted ways. it reminds me of kasen when he’s with sayo orz

kasen has this air of resignation as he recites the origin of his name. i feel like shaking him and saying NOOOOOOO cant you see nobody thinks those 36 dead people were your fault?? youre respected and loved just as you are!

‘kasen kanesada, will you kill gracia? you, who was tadaoki’s sword, will you kill the person he loved?’ crying screaming throwing up ripping my curtains apart smashing thw windows tearing out all the pages from my books this line isso bonkers insane . and kokin using kasens full name too

holy fuck kasen has so much of an internal crisis about it its insane.

ofc kokin smiles bc he also Knows that.

ofc kasen bites back w his own questions. thats just how those two are . its like they view human emotions as a sort of weakness, that kasen is inherently weak for not feeling completely sure about killing her, and that kokin is weak and denying his purpose as a touken danshi for wanting to save jizou.

>scene ending with kokin alone, talking to no one in particular (or is he?) wondering if he’s naïve.

>next scene starting with jizou saying ‘kaze ka?’ you see the connection?? The heavenly wind and kokin???? The hecking amatsukaze???????????

God. Isn’t it ironic how jizou prays to his god so that he can preserve gracia’s connection to her god? (note: in kahakugeki he only used one hand for this line, in kiden he uses both)

Hmmm aren’t flowers ephemeral and fragile? I understand where jizou’s coming from, heck my guess for what he’d call her was also a flower, and why kokin calls her a blossom of the Hosokawa, but I cant help but wonder if that’s a way to simply emphasize her weakness and inability to live as she liked, having her life mostly dictated by the men around her. Tadaoki’s the only one who calls her a snake, capable of biting back. The same snake that threw humanity into sin. Ironically enough it’s the person who loved/hated her that could understand her. But then again, its tadaoki’s heart inside jizou that’s also calling her a flower. Honestly she can (and does) symbolize both.

Having no home to return to must hurt…….

Im so happy they can finally fight with real enemies instead of like last time ><

The reason im so glad they paired up Kasen and Nikkari is bc both of them are haunted by the sin of what they killed, and seeing them get along so well, like they know each others intricacies, what the other is thinking, its like a genuine bond.

Ok and now one of the most emotionally charged scenes ever………..

hmmm how to put this simply. it’d be easy to leave it as simply ‘straight married couple argument’ but it begs a more deeper nuance than that. lets see. gracia and tadaoki meet for the first time in what is probably, a long time. all this time tadaoki was so worked about hating her and wanting to kill her and yet his first instinct is to let out all his pent up feelings and.....cling to her........ ‘why did we become this way?’ ..........even though they loved each other and were married for over 20 years, held on even through akechi mitsuhide’s betrayal, tama’s conversion. ….how were they reduced to this? Its precisely because of that bond that gracia asked him to kill her, and precisely because of that bond that tadaoki couldn’t. its so so simple to say what we want to do but when the reality of the situation catches up, can we really stay the same?

and tadaoki’s last words to her were literally ‘my snake’

oughoughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhOUCH rip

and thats her breaking point. shes literally driven to hysterics. and she didnt want to ascertain tadaoki’s heart....she simply wanted to be forgiven (the reasons that cut the deepest are the most simplest ones) for the sin of hating the person she loved.

but,,,,,,,as much as i loved thisscene, as much as i couldnt bear to watch it in consequent rewatches,,,,,this gracia isnt the real gracia.....she just isnt. the humans in altered timelines never are.

‘let’s go, aneue’ ‘where?’ ‘anywhere. maybe even to hell’ <- wtf twfffffffffsdjnfffffffffffffffffff jizou said GOODBYE TO KARMA AND MORALITY I’D FOLLOW MY BELOVED ANYWHERE

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭tadadsifkofjkasensdnfkasjfnkjnsakjfnajnfajsnjcksanfwehfiuhwenudnjfuwfnzsexdrctfvgybhnjkmgbhjnk YOURE GOING TO DIE IN YOUR BEST FRIEND’S ARMS AND YOU PLAY ALONG BECAUSE ITS WRITTEN DOWN YOUVE MEMORIZED IT ITS ALL YOU KNOW 😭😭😭😭😭😭 

tadaoki’s honshin was that he didnt want to kill gracia and jizou and kasen inherited that same heart are you listening!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1!!111!1111!!!!!!!!!!!!

it physically hurts to see kasen so very nearly crying . its like everytime he meets tadaoki he’s left perplexed and dissatisfied  and so so upset and he doesnt know what to do with all these feelings

ending with all the revisionists so far......ito, ryoma, takeuchi, toyou, those two from tenden/muden, the black armour, oboro manba.......kuroda kanbei.......who’s absolutely digging that long hair............

[donkey-hyuck]

word count- 2.5k+

genre- FLUFFY | neighbor!au

characters/pairings- neighbor!jeno x reader (gender neutral) | dreamies

warnings- language | dialogue heavy | over usage of words bc i’m irrelevant | the cutest people ever

introduction- since moving to the city— closer to your university— you noticed that your cat had taken an interest in another cat from the apartment building across from yours. she seemed very intrigued and things only escalated. in a good way for the both of you. because who knew such a good looking guy owned three cats he was allergic to?

a/n- based on some ‘the dodo’ story i saw a couple months ago and it was so cute hehe. also yes this is another jeno drabble thingy okay. and idk where the divider is from, i just have it on my phone sorry :(

the last box you had packed prior was finally set in your new apartment by your brother.

“this is the last one, right? because i’m not helping you anymore,” he huffed out a breath and rested his hands on his thigh. you snorted out a laugh and responded, “lazy ass. yeah, this is the last box. thanks for coming.”

you invited your brother to stay a bit later to treat him for takeout but he declined and reassured you he was fine and was going to head home. nodding your head, you just agreed as you walked him to the door.

it was only about six p.m. when you decided to unpack the rest of the boxes that you and your brother had brought up. when walking back into the living room, the shades to the window were still opened and you saw your cat, bomi, sitting by the window peering through the opened shades. the apartments from the complex across from yours were the same as any others. many university students or young adults filled the rooms, some curtains were closed, and some were lit up by the LED lights that lined their ceilings. but one window was opened. it showcased the large tv the stranger had as well as three cats by the window as well. one of them was even similar to bomi. however you thought nothing of it, too tired of driving back and forth and bringing boxes up and down. so you closed everything in for the night after unpacking about three or four boxes.

the following morning, you walked to the kitchen. and through the opened kitchen was your living room which you saw bomi sitting at the window again. you had called her over and put the cat food in the bowl for her breakfast. after leaving bomi for her breakfast, you grabbed your laptop from your bedroom and sat on the couch to finish some work and answer emails from your new university. moments of rereading emails stopped when you looked up— for no particular reason— and saw the same cats that caught bomi’s attention by the window. and then the shade was opened. oh wow.

the owner of the cats was a male. you didn’t want to assume but he looked as though he was around the same age as you. and he was cute. really fucking cute. the guy that opened the shade was wearing a pair of adidas track pants and was shirtless. and you just stared at him, as creepy as it looked and sounded like. by his feet were his three cats and bomi was sat next to the window once again.

“bomi, what’s wrong with you all of a sudden?” you asked and grabbed her small body and sat back on the couch. “do you want friends now? are you lonely because we moved?” you joked to yourself and scratched behind her ears. but once you set her free from your grasp, she sat by the window and you noticed one of his cats was looking at bomi. just as you were about to put away your laptop, bomi got up and walked around the perimeter of the window with her head still facing out the ceiling-to-floor window.

your eyes followed her feline figure and an idea shot up from your noggin. you didn’t know if it would work but it was worth a shot. so you went to your car and drove to a nearby craft store to buy some poster boards and markers. when you got home, you contemplated in your mind for a couple minutes before just going for it. fuck it. you wrote the poster as if you were in bomi’s body. and you thought it was a bit childish and unrealistic but it was worth a try.

‘hi, i’m bomi from the apartment complex next door. i see you three cats, do you wanna be friends?’ unbelievable. absolutely unbelievable. but you just taped it up on the window and closed the shade just enough for you not to see if he responded and got ready to go to your job. this was never going to work.

—

when you got home, the sun was just barely setting and bomi was once again, sitting by the window and looking out into that apartment. you sighed to yourself and picked her up before opening the shade to see if the cats— or more so the boy— had responded.

thankfully, the boy didn’t reply and it calmed your nerves down a bit more. the entire day you were away at work, thoughts filled your head about all the possible outcomes that could happen. without realizing, you breathed out in relief and set down bomi to get ready to eat dinner and shower. all the while, you forgot about the poster and there it was— left taped on the window.

donghyuck, renjun, and chenle had been over jeno’s apartment that day when they saw the poster taped on your window.

“jeno! who’s bomi?” exclaimed hyuck with his brows raised up and down, playfully. jeno got up from his seat at the kitchen island when he looked out the window behind his couch. he then just shrugged but did not miss the cat that looked somewhat like seol. then renjun spoke, “maybe it’s that cat. hey, doesn’t she look a little like seol?” chenle went toward the window to put his two cents into the conversation, “hey, she kinda does! what if she’s looking at your cats, jeno?” he asked and pointed out the window. “we should write back!” he then said with a bright smile on his face.

“we can, but i don’t have any poster paper right now,” he excused. though the boys thought he was lying they suggested that they would go to the nearest corner store to buy some cheap poster papers to reply to you.

and they did, but around ten at night when you were long gone from your living room and asleep in your bed. bomi wasn’t at the window either, but they still decided to write the letter for you in the morning.

‘i’m seol, the one that looks like you. the one with the black is nal and the one with the gray stripes is bongshik. it’s nice to meet you!’ read the sign. jeno could not believe he was writing back to a stranger he’s never even seen before. but it was whatever, new friends for his cats, he figured. the male held the sign in front of him for a minute before just shaking his head and taping the poster to his window and he was out for the night.

—

the morning you woke up, you had set a reminder to yourself that your classes started today and got up from your bed to make breakfast for both you and your kitty. opening the shade to the window, bomi was pawing and softly meowing at the window.

noticing the paper still stuck on the window, you mentally curse yourself out and look to the opposite side of your building. there was also a piece of poster paper that was taped onto the window with his three cats under it, looking out into the city. you identified the three cats immediately.

“bomi look! you really do look like seol. they can be your friends instead of those alley cats back home,” you spoke to her and then got ready to attend your nine a.m. class. however before putting on your shoes, you wrote back a little note for the cats on the opposite building.

‘great! y/n (my owner) is at university but let’s meet some day!’ you still could not believe you were doing this as you finished taping up the board. you left it there for the day as you went to your classes for the next couple hours.

throughout your first classes, your mind always went back to what happened the last few days. your neighbors as well as his neighbors must’ve thought you were both crazy. but anything for your cats.

—

for some reason when you got home, you were in a rush to see if the boy had responded to the message you left that morning. and in all hell, he did.

‘hey! jeno (our owner) is on his way to class too! and yes, let’s definitely meet one day! our owners can meet too!’

when jeno awoke that morning, he was shoving cereal down his throat and looked at your window. his heart was beating faster as he read over the note and ran to put away his bowl and get ready for his class. though he didn’t forget to write back at you, even if you probably wouldn’t see it until later.

with the cap of the marker in his mouth, jeno quickly wrote down what he was going to say and messily taped the poster to his window and left his house. he was almost late for his nine a.m. class.

watching the students come in you noticed the owner of bongsik, nal, and seol come into the room. oh shit. you tried to hide yourself behind the screen of your laptop when you remembered that he’s probably never seen you before. so slowly, you escaped your little hideaway and kept your identity on the low. because he might have seen you in broad daylight when your shades were up. but he didn’t, so you were safe.

—

looking at the message taped to his window, you wrote back.

you were sitting on the carpet floor of the living room when jeno finally saw you; specifically your side profile but he wasn’t complaining. you were doing the same thing he was that morning— the marker cap in your mouth with your brows furrowed.

he then saw your face when you sat up and got the roll of tape to stick on the glass. and you too, saw him looking at you with a smile on his face. your jaw was slightly dropped and the cap of the marker fell from your mouth as the boy laughed at your expression, then he waved. your eyes were opened wide and you shyly waved back.

jeno read over the note you just wrote. ‘hi i’m y/n (sorry this whole thing was so weird but my cat would not stop meowing at yours) but we could meet at the park? if you’d like?’ he smiled even more as he read over your writing. jeno nodded and asked ‘is it okay if we meet now?’ to which you shook your head ‘yes’ and were on your way to the nearest park (which was a measly three minute walk from your apartment.) then, you realized you never specified a park and just hoped he came to this one.

your hands were in your pockets as you awkwardly looked around to see the cute boy that lived across the street. he came up from behind you and greeted, “hi, i’m jeno.”

upon the sudden talk, you slightly jumped and turned around as he laughed again, his eye smile on full display.

the two of you walked around the park and conversed for what seemed like a couple minutes. but after you exchanged numbers and arrived home, you realized you had been at the park for a good hour and a half. holy shit.

you found out a little bit more about lee jeno. he was allergic to cats yet he still adopted three (which was beyond the epitome of cute), that he also moved to the city around a year ago, and that you two were attending the same nine a.m. class. you two had so much in common, huh?

arriving home to his apartment, jeno laid on his bed with his hand over his heart. it was beating fast. who knew his cats would bring him someone so attractive?

just as he was thinking about you, seol jumped on his bed and knocks were heard from his front door. he rolled his eyes and got up from his bed, it was his best friends staying for the night. it was a friday, after all.

while hanging with his best friends he decided to message you to see what was popping i hate that i said that lmao. and through the next two movies, jeno was not paying attention. he’d look to see what was happening here and there but always trained his eyes back to his phone.

“ayy why are you on your phone?” teased jaemin and hyuck.

“yeah, who are you texting this time at night?” said mark and jisung.

“and why are you texting someone?” poked chenle and renjun.

none of these questions were barely answered because jeno was too busy smiling at his screen. but then mark looked over his shoulder to see that jeno was texting you.

“ayyy, who’s y/n?” mark raised his voice and hit jeno’s strong bicep. just as your name exited mark’s mouth, jaemin’s eyes lit up and knew who you were.

“oh my god, that’s soojin’s new neighbor!” he shouted and stood up from the couch.

“jeno’s got a (boy)girlfriend! jeno’s got a (boy)girlfriend! jeno’s got a (boy)girlfriend!” the six boys jumped from their seats and chanted. renjun then reminded them that you lived across the street and they ran to the window to see if you were there. unfortunately for them, your shades were closed and the only thing they were able to see was bomi.

“hey doesn’t that cat kinda look like seol?”

the next day (after his friends had left), jeno invited you to come to his apartment so that bomi could meet his three cats, two which you agreed and packed whatever bomi needed. you weren’t going to stay there long, right?

—

when bomi met bongshik, nal, and seol, the four of them kicked it off nicely. there was no hissing nor scratching and it made both you and jeno happy to see that your cats were getting along after never having a meeting. so while your cats played around in jeno’s apartment, he offered to let you stay for dinner. you were hesitant at first but agreed as he ordered some soju and chicken. predictable.

to you, jeno was being nice. though he was cute, you didn’t really know who he was and so you didn’t have a reason to catch feelings for him. but to jeno, you were more of a crush. not a big one since you both just met, but a tiny one. he knew you were a good person at heart and he couldn’t help the little emotions that he felt in his chest.

—

after many play dates between your pets, you did actually start to form feelings for lee jeno and he finally had the guts to ask if you wanted to go on a date.

“i thought you would never ask.”

and though it all deemed impossible and like a fairytale, you were glad you spoke up that day. because in the end, you got a boyfriend that was loving, and your cats had each other to play with.

[dianapocalypse]

Alright y’all, with the release of Mass Effect: Legendary Edition, it’s time for me to share my playlist for the entire trilogy.

I’ve refined this over like six years so scientifically speaking it’s probably good right. oh also it’s four hours long. so if you have a road trip or a boring job, this one’s for you. disclaimer, it’s entirely possible I have garbage taste in music. I also missed some characters and moments because there’s 65 songs here and I am merely human.

If you don’t have the patience for four hours, I recommend starting at track 45 and listening to the end, as the Mass Effect 3 portion is the strongest in my opinion.

UNDER THE CUT FOR DESCRIPTIONS WE GO!

FIRST MOVEMENT - MASS EFFECT 1

1. Atlas - Coldplay Eden Prime

“Sometimes the wire Must tense for the note Caught in the fire, say oh We're about to explode“

I really like the atmosphere of this song. It’s ominous, but also somehow hopeful, and makes me feel like Something Huge Is Coming.

2. I Will Not Sing A Hateful Song - Constantines Paragon Shepard

“But I was also born and raised To always speak and listen clear To know the last sound that I make Could be the last sound that I hear“

OK, listen, I think this song is about vampires, and I’m not sure if it’s supposed to be a metaphor or not. But I think this is a great song about controlling one’s temper, about knowing that you have to Rise Above the parts of you that want to lash out sometimes to get things done and have peace. Seeing as how paragon Shepard, to me, always seems like they’re three deep breaths away from snapping, but manage to keep it in check, it fits them to a T.

And also maybe they’re a vampire.

3. Hard to Kill - Beth Crowley Renegade Shepard

“So I let the rumors Turn me into a legend 'Cause I'm only human But a good myth is hard to kill”

This one’s a recent addition, but holy cow, I love it for Renegade Shep, particularly an Earthborn or Ruthless, but it works for any of them.

4. We Own the Skies - Five Iron Frenzy Joker

“My hands are bleeding where they often crack The stars will sometimes burn with longing Through the choking black Of night shifts piling each against the next”

This really vibes with Joker’s backstory for me, his super driven serious self in flight school, contrasted with who he is when he can fly a ship. He’s the best pilot in the goddamn fleet and I love him.

5. I Just Wanna See - Smash Mouth Kaidan Alenko

“Mister moon checkin' on how y'all livin' The stars all winkin' at the day that's dimmin' I just wanna see”

This song fits into his reactions to first showing up at the Citadel and his former romanticism about living in space. Ironically, it’s a song about Earth, but I feel like it works well for him. Also, Smash Mouth absolutely sounds like the kind of music Kaidan would listen to, no I will not be taking questions or constructive criticism.

6. Don’t Give Up - Noisettes Ashley Williams

“She's got a talented face and a suitcase Ain't got no desire to go no place In her case she's got no desire with her hand in the flame say's she don't feel the fire “

The energy of this song is just perfect for Ashley’s no-nonsense chip on her shoulder attitude.

7. About As Helpful As You Can Be Without Being Any Help At All - Dan Mangan The Council

“I was thrown in the boat/Cast out to sea Friendly with waves/There were sharks below Hungry for me/So I dangled my leg”

I mean, the title says it all.

8. The Captain - Guster Anderson

“Courageous, just like the captain Marching forward with no doubt in his head”

I have adored this song ever since my friend played it for me, and it’s the ultimate mentor-protégé jam for me.

9. Secret Agent Man - Johnny Rivers Garrus Vakarian

“Here's a man who leads a life of danger To everyone he meets he stays a stranger Oh, with every move he makes another chance he takes The odds are he won't live to see tomorrow”

I have to poke a little fun at Garrus and how seriously he takes himself in Mass Effect 1. I romanced him across four playthrus, I’m allowed!

10. I’m Getting Too Old For This Shit - Kill Lincoln Urdnot Wrex

“This random apathy/I swear it's killing me But I guess it's all the same, till the devil knows my name”

I don’t know ANYTHING about this band, but this song fits Wrex’s disillusionment with the Krogan well, plus, like. The title. (And also, that he secretly DOES care what happens to the Krogan.)

11. Bird Song - Juniper Vale Tali’zorah nar Rayya

“I want to dance on the horizon line But there is something I am caged behind I have a heart made for take flight But I'm low, so low”

I adore this song and the sound of Juniper Vale in general. The etherealness of this one, combined with the youthful optimism, feels very Tali. The line about ‘something I am caged behind’ works well for the suits, too. This one’s especially good if you’re a Talimancer!

12. 11. Green Garden - Laura Mvula Liara T’Soni

“And I’ll fly on the wings of a butterfly High as a tree top and down again Putting my bag down, taking my shoes off Walk on the carpet of green velvet”

I really like this song’s vibes and I feel like Liara fits it well, particularly in ME1, before all her youthful optimism is stripped from her. The scenery descriptions feel very Thessia, too.

13. Feed Me (Git It) - Little Shop of Horrors The Thorian 

“The guy sure looks like plant food to me!”

Do you get it. Do you get my joke. It’s because the Thorian is a plant that eats people. (I’m not funny)

14. Blindness - Metric Matriarch Benezia

“I was a blind fool, never complained All the survivors singing in the rain “

I don’t love the use of blind here as a negative, albeit metaphorical, descriptor, but I think this song fits Benezia’s indoctrination and death well. If you have suggestions for another, though, let me know!

15. Technologic - Daft Punk Saren

“Buy it, use it, break it, fix it, trash it, change it, mail, upgrade it”

I just think it’s Neat

16. Watershed - Vienna Teng The Reapers

“ While you were building your empires I was still sleeping”

I think this is the song that inspired the entire playlist. Vienna Teng sat down and decided to write a song from the perspective of a natural disaster, and it’s so ominous and gut-wrenching.

17. Hourglass - The Hush Sound Virmire

“This is how it ends We believe every lie and say we'll be friends How long will it last? Before we scratch all the scripts and we rework the cast “

hahahahah rework the cast get it because you have to pick who DIES

Seriously tho I really like this song for Virmire and that moment of choice that feels like it lasts 100 years on some playthroughts.

18. Pompeii - Bastille The Siege of the Citadel

“ And the walls kept tumbling down In the city that we love”

Throwback to when this song was on the radio like three times an hour. Which is around the time I made the first draft of this playlist, incidentally! It’s such a good Final Battle Jam for the Citadel, and the part about “if you close your eyes/does it almost feel like nothing’s changed at all” I think work really well for Shepard in this sequence. Shepard knew the Reapers were coming, had been fighting them all along; this attack on the Citadel is just retreading familiar territory for them, as horrifying as the war being brought to their doorstep is for the Citadel’s citizens and the council. James Vega has some good dialogue about that kind of thing in ME3.

INTERLUDE THE FIRST

19. Starships - Nicki Minaj The Normandy Crew

Starships were meant to fly Hands up and touch the sky

I like to have a little fun OK

20. Gravity - Yoko Kanno The Death of Commander Shepard

“Am I alone? is somebody there beyond these heavy aching feet still the road keeps on telling me to go on”

Welcome to mood whiplash, it’s my specialty! This is the part where you die. I think it also works for her coma very well, when she’s just drifting between life and death, not sure what’s going on, but something keeps trying to pull her back to the world.

SECOND MOVEMENT - MASS EFFECT 2

21. The Phoenix - Fall Out Boy The Lazarus Project

“Hey young blood, doesn't it feel like our time is running out? I'm gonna change you like a remix Then I'll raise you like a phoenix “

this song has no right to go as hard as it does and if  you think it’s melodramatic shut up

22. My Body Is A Cage - Peter Gabriel Commander Shepard

“I'm living in an age Whose name I don't know Though the fear keeps me moving Still my heart beats so slow “

This works particularly well if you romanced The Virmire Survivor, but this song captures the energy of Shepard freaking out bc they are trapped with Cerberus, because Cerberus rebuilt their body from the ground up. That jarring, caged feeling is so palpable in ME2 that when they gave me back Joker the first time I played, I BURST INTO SOBS from relief.

23. The Lady is a Vamp - The Spice Girls Miranda Lawson

“That's all in the past, legends built to last But she's got something new”

Listen. She’s a bond babe. Handbags, heels and pistols rock. She’s got class. This is a song about Miranda. That is all.

24. Kryptonite - 3 Doors Down Jacob Taylor

“ I watched the world float to the dark side of the moon After all I knew, it had to be something to do with you “

This one’s about the Vibes for me. Also can apply to his past relationship with Miranda. I’m also super showing my age on this song, oof haha.

25. Stable Song - Death Cab For Cutie Colony Abduction

“Rows of deserted houses all Our stable mates highway bound “

I really like the mood of this one for showing up on the very first abducted colony, the eerieness and sadness of it all and Shepard’s resolve to do something about it.

26. Konichiwa Bitches - Robyn Kasumi Goto

“I'm so very hot that when I rob your mansion You ain't call the cops, you call the fire station”

THAT COUPLET ALONE MAKES THE ENTIRE SONG. I love how playful and cheeky it is.

27. Seven Nation Army Glitch Mob Remix - The White Stripes, Glitch Mob Zaeed Massani

“And I'm talking to myself at night Because I can't forget Back and forth through my mind Behind a cigarette”

Pretty sure we all had this on some playlist or another when it came out, and it’s the perfect Badass With A Grudge song.

28. Science is Real - They Might Be Giants Mordin Solus

“ And when a theory emerges Consistent with the facts The proof is with science The truth is with science “

This one actually got added by my wife to replace a song that wasn’t on Spotify, but that has the same energy; Hank Green’s “I Fucking Love Science”. I get more into the emotional side of Mordin in the ME3 section, but I also really just love his Hamster On Coffee energy and this song captures it really well.

29. Prove Yourself - Radiohead Garrus Vakarian

“I can't afford to breathe in this town Nowhere to sit without a gun in my hand Hooked back up to the cathode ray

I'm better off dead “

The absolute rock bottom mental state Garrus is in when you get back to him in ME2 is so heartwrenching. Might not always agree with my boy’s methods, but he’s one of my favorite fictional characters of all time.

30. Rat a Tat - Fallout Boy Feat. Courtney Love Jack

“We are professional ashes of roses, this kerosene's live You settled your score, this is where you come to beg”

It helps that Courtney Love sounds exactly like Jack to me, NGL.

31. Defeat You - Smash Mouth Grunt

“Hey I know what you've done It makes it that much better to defeat you “

Only I am brave enough to put two songs by Smash Mouth on the same playlist, to be shared in 2021

32. The Boy Who Blocked His Own Shot - Brand New Horizon/The Virmire Survivor

“If it makes you less sad I will die by your hand Hope you find out what you want Already know what I am “

Hits harder if you romanced the Virmire Survivor. Mostly from Shep’s perspective. This is a Shep that feels Bad after that encounter rather than Mad, so Your Mileage May Vary.

33. Violet Stars Happy Hunting! - Janelle Monae Tali’zorah vas Neema

“I'm an alien from outer space I'm a cyber-girl without a face a heart or a mind”

I just like the vibes of this one for Tali! I know it’s more about an actual AI but...IDK. I like it. So there.

34. Comfortably Numb - Pink Floyd Thane Krios

“There is no pain you are receding A distant ship smoke on the horizon”

This song works both on a Literal level with his Kepral’s syndrome struggles, but also Metaphorical re: his Battle Sleep. Plus, Thane is a dad, so he gets Dad Rock.

35. My Medea - Vienna Teng Samara

“For I have made her prison be Her every step away from me And this child I would destroy If you tried to set her free “

Mom of the year award, here

36. Toxic - Britney Spears Morinth

“There's no escape, I can't wait I need a hit, baby, give me it You're dangerous, I'm loving it”

If Morinth weren’t so under-utilized after recruitment and didn’t get killed off in the background of ME3 I’d probably actually recruit her sometimes. I almost did on my most recent playthru bc that Shepard just HATES SPACE COPS. Anyway the song explains itself

37. Turn me On - David Guetta feat. Nicki Minaj EDI/The Collector Attack

“My body needs a hero Come and save me Something tells me you know how to save me”

I know this song is a metaphor but also it works really well both literally and metaphorically for Joker saving EDI

38. Robots - Dan Mangan Legion

“Robots need love too They want to be loved by you “

The Geth just want to live peacefullyyyyyy 

39. Be Still - The Killers Love Interest Theme

“Be still / someday you’ll leave fearlessness on your sleeve”

This song works so well for the night before Omega-4. If you had an ME2 love interest, anyway. Also “fearlessness on your sleeve” is one of my favorite set of words ever written.

40. No Cars Go - Arcade Fire The Omega-4 Relay

“We know a place no spaceships go We know a place where no subs go “

This one’s pretty literal.

41. Rocketman - Elton John Suicide Mission

“ And I think it's gonna be a long, long time 'Til touchdown brings me 'round again to find I'm not the man they think I am at home “

I like sneaking some Classics onto my playlists, and I think this is how I generally approach Shepard’s mindset during the Suicide Mission, mostly the chorus. I’m also a sucker for ballads during action sequences. This one isn’t a perfect 1:1 but the Vibes check out.

42. Blast Off - David Guetta feat. Kaz James The Normandy Crew

“Got all my people with me And none of us give a fuck So put dem hands up higher Let's smash this party up”

You have to imagine they partied HARD after recovering from Suicide Mission, but before Shep got arrested, right??? This is the Starships for ME2.

INTERLUDE THE SECOND

43. I’m Not Your Hero - Tegan and Sara Liara T’soni

“ Feeling like I am now lighting up the hall I was used to standing in the shadow of a damaged heart Learning all I know now, losing all I did I never used to feel like I'd be standing so far ahead “

This feels like a good coming of age moment for Liara, as she copes with the choices she made in the 2 years of Shepard’s death (giving them to Cerberus), losing Feron, etc. This is her coming into her own as the Shadow Broker. She’s not meant to be an uncomplicated Big Damn Hero, but she can do good from this position.

44. The Well and the Lighthouse - Arcade Fire The Alpha Relay Incident

“I'm serving time All for a crime I did commit You want the truth? You know I'd do it all again“

These opening lines I feel capture the Alpha Relay Incident really well, and how Shepard did what they HAD to do there, and would do it again, but it still feels like shit. I always wished there was more choice on that mission, but also, having something like that happen without player agency is interesting. Shepard is at their most interesting, I think, in times where we DON’T have a say in what happens to them.

45. Reignite - Malukah Commander Shepard

“Crush my heart into embers, and I will reignite”

Is it cheating to use a Mass Effect fan song on my playlist? I certainly don’t think so, and this is the best Mass Effect fan song ever written.

THIRD MOVEMENT - MASS EFFECT 3

46. This Is War - Thirty Seconds to Mars Leaving Earth

“It's the moment of truth, and the moment to lie The moment to live and the moment to die The moment to fight, the moment to fight To fight, to fight, to fight “

It feels Too Easy to use this here but I’m gonna anyway. You’ve seen AMVs of this set to everything. It’s the ending song of DA:O. It’s the quintessential World At War song.

47. Battleborn - The Killers James Vega

“Up against the wall There's something dying on the street When they knock you down You're gonna get back on your feet”

James Vega is massively underrated and I will love him til I’m cold in the ground. Aro icon.

48. Handlebars - Flobots The Illusive Man

“I can hand out a million vaccinations Or let 'em all die of exasperation Have 'em all healed of their lacerations Have 'em all killed by assassination”

The way this song escalates fits TIM and Cerberus’s fall back into being Just Full On Evil really well. Perfect song for a power trip.

49. Here I Dreamt I Was An Architect - The Decemberists The Virmire Survivor

“And I am nothing of a builder But here I dreamt I was an architect And I built this balustrade To keep you home, to keep you safe From the outside world”

I like this song for how the Virmire Survivor feels about their survivor’s guilt and also about Shepard. I honestly wish they were both more heavily utilized in ME2 and 3, but I realize it’s hard to write a ton of content for characters who just aren’t in half of all peoples’ playthrus.

50. Heaven Knows - The Pretty Reckless Grisson Academy

“One, two, three and four, the devil's knocking at your door Caught in the eye of a dead man's lie Show your life with your head held high“

This song is so perfect for Jack and her biotic kids that she’s one of the only returning characters that gets her own song on this playlist

51. The Great Fire - OK Go Javik

“But when the flames die down, and everything is gone, Will there be fire under the ashes still?”

Self explanatory. Javik is the fire remaining under the ashes.

52. Bring the Hammer Down - Paragon Priority: Tuchanka/Kalros

“ Hammer strikes the anvil A rage that breaks the chain Strikes down like a lightening In our ranks “

KALROOOOOS

53. Wake Up - Arcade Fire Curing The Genophage/Mordin Solus

“If the children don't grow up, Our bodies get bigger but our hearts get torn up. We're just a million little gods causin' rain storms, turnin' every good thing to Rust I guess we'll just have to adjust”

I just really love this song as an image of Mordin’s spirit looking out over Tuchanka as the genophage cure is dispersed, and watching over future generations. If you didn’t cure the genophage, how dare you. No song for you.

Anyway started tearing up listening to this one while writing the description don’t look at me

54. Ballad of a Politician - Regina Spektor Councillor Udina/Priority Citadel 2

“A man inside a room is shaking hands with other men This is how it happens/Our carefully laid plans”

traitor

55. Cyborgs vs. Robots - Ludo The Geth-Quarian War

“But your iron fist will never knock me down 'Cause I'm powered By a conscious right to conduct my life without fear.”

This is probably a bit silly for this awful war. But also. It does fit. You can’t tell me it doesn’t. Just save them both at the end and you can feel fine having some fun with it!

56. Artificial Heart - Jonathan Coulton The Geth

“It's not a real heart It is a real artificial heart”

Just a little fun with the Geth! This works best with Reaper Upgrades.

57. With A Little Help From My Friends - Joe Anderson, Jim Sturgess The Citadel DLC

“What do you see when you turn out the light? I can't tell you, but I know it's mine

Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends”

I happen to prefer this version to any other because of how much fun it sounds like they’re having

58. Dark In Here - The Mountain Goats Priority: Earth

“Steal away at sundown, pick a place to hide Check for signs of ambush, hunker down inside Tired of running, tired of never standing still Hear them riding up the hill“

You know I had to get the Goats in here. Would it be a fan playlist if there wasn’t one?

59. Adieu - Yoko Kanno Leaving your Love Interest/Shepard and the Beam

“My love for you burns deep inside me / So strong Embers of times we had And now, here I stand / Lost in a memory I see your face, and smile”

...do I need to say more than that?

60. My Way (Minor Key) - Chase Holfelder The Indoctrination of The Illusive Man

“Regrets, I've had a few/But then again, too few to mention I did what I had to do/I saw it through, without exemption“

This cover takes this song from something I tolerate when I hear it to one of my FAVORITE songs. The frenzied way he sings the “through it all” verse is PEAK Indoctrinated TIM.

61. I’m Alive - Disturbed Refusal 

“There will never be a reason why I will surrender to your advice To change myself, I'd rather die/Though they will not understand”

Honestly I didn’t “get” the Refusal ending until I heard this song, then I was like, OH, I SEE IT ALL SO CLEARLY NOW. This is my favorite in-universe Shepard take on the Refusal ending. I always got it from the player’s perspective of being dissatisfied with the options, but this one puts it into the world for me. This is a Shepard who does not trust the Starchild. This is a Shepard that chooses to end things on their own terms rather than submit to their designs.

62. Machine - Regina Spektor Control 

“I collect my moments Into a correspondence With a mightier power Who just lacks my perspective And who lacks my organics And who covets my defects “

I used to have Adieu here, actually, because like Refusal, I didn’t used to GET the Control ending. Now, I do, in part thanks to hearing this song. I mean, just go look at the full lyrics. If this song hadn’t been written years before the end of Mass Effect 3, I’d swear it was a fan song for it.

63. Maybe Tomorrow - Yuki Kajiura Destroy 

“The moon is gone And the night is still so dark I'm a little bit afraid of tomorrow“

I’m a Destroy Ending person, I won’t lie. Full on “the starchild is a liar and my synthetic friends are FINE” indoctrination theory level destroy ending. But this song is not about that. It’s about the canonical destroy ending, and if you prefer a Shep that survives it, this song’s for you.

This song captures the exhaustion and melancholy of the end of a long journey so well. Shepard is afraid of what comes next, the collateral damage resulting from their actions. But they know that, at least, it’s over now. Maybe tomorrow will be better.

64. Waiting For the End - Linkin Park Synthesis

“ I know what it takes to move on I know how it feels to lie All I wanna do is trade this life for something new Holding on to what I haven't got”

This is one of my favorite songs of all time. The hardest part of ending is starting again. Oof. Gets me every single time. Shepard finding the resolve to sacrifice themself for the hope of something better, of things not going how they planned, ever, of learning to make peace with that and the people who loved them learning to carry on without them? OOF.

65. Shine - Vienna Teng Epilogue

“Shine with all the untold Hold the light given unto you Find the love to unfold In this broken world we choose“

Vienna Teng is a master of capturing life’s softer emotions, and this fits perfectly with the epilogue scene for me. Tell me again about the Shepard.

“Find the love to unfold in this broken world we choose” has to be one of the greatest lines about the human experience ever written.

[whoslaurapalmer]

shadow and bone 5-8 

okay first   -you know the more i think about it the more pissed i am that botkin only did show up for a hot second -i hope he shows up more if there's another season but?????? what a MISSED opportunity with alina!!!!! like!!!!!!!!!!! i can't believe it honestly  -not ONLY is there more of him in the book!! but it would've been great with alina being shu!!!!  -they really didn't think that through, did they. botkin is RIGHT THERE and they missed him  -take out nina and put in botkin!! or take out all the crows and give them the justice they deserve in their own season and put in botkin!!!! (the books, as enjoyable as they were to read, still suffer so much in terms of pacing and not having a super tight plot and the show should’ve taken advantage of the opportunity to make changes to make it better and 90% of the time the show just finds a way to drop the ball!!!!!!!!!!!!) 

-also i don't remember what article i read this in, if it was the slate one or a different one, about alina deserving a teacher who doesn't, know you, beat her with a stick  -like, as usual! ON THE ONE HAND baghra is allowed to be a character that's not a good person. characters are allowed to not be good people. that's fine. i like baghra!  -on the other hand..............................................don't smack your students nobody learns from being smacked around 

i was really excited to see alina not take the path baghra told her to -- because again i had been disappointed to see the show not make any major changes to make the plot better (crows interacting with alina doesn’t count bc as people have rightly pointed out, the crows plotline really doesn’t matter here it’s just them having a good time and filling in space) so to see alina do something different and actually show a lot of agency and be competent on her own was great!!!! wish it hadn’t taken like five episodes to get there, though!!!! i know a lot of it is because she’s completely out of her element in the little palace but that’s a big complaint about alina across the board, that she doesn’t have the most distinct personality, and to see her thinking for herself and especially thinking outside of mal was nice also her getting in the carriage the crows are stealing was the funniest thing  oh but her setting the maps on fire in episode one does not count, because that was completely unnecessary, there was no reason to not just have all the cartographers go in the first place like in the book. 

-i was kind of rooting for arken, because he was just enjoyable with the crows, and because i just completely forgot about kaz seeing him meeting zlatan, but good for kaz for being on top of that, that’s my boy 

-that’s a shame about marie  -but uhhhhhhhhh -“i don’t want to die with the wrong face on” i get what she’s saying but i thought that was. weird 

in the continuing ‘nina and alina have similar things happening and i still don’t know what to make of it????????????’ thoughts, nina and matthias trying to keep warm / alina and mal trying to keep warm, matthias being afraid of nina / mal not being afraid of alina i love nina a lot but i am just not invested in nina here  oh and nina was spying for the darkling??? i don’t have the energy to think about if that tracks for nina’s character  also i never thought about how kind of uncomfortable all her lewd lines are, not because matthias is uncomfortable, but because nina comes off sounding less teasing or flirty and more kind of pushy and creepy  they’ve only known each other for............how long  what is even time here 

-it’s not that baghra isn’t threatening but........no it’s that baghra wasn’t threatening  -her talking to the darkling was like. it was weird? there should be so much weight and power in them talking to each other 

-i did like that she said to alina that the darkling had a lot of practice manipulating naive girls cause, yeah girl that’s what it was -you thought you decided to kiss him yourself???? you think he was really surprised??????? nnnnnnnnnnnnnno  -the thing is i have like very little sympathy for the darkling. very little. i get the allure, everybody who was ever a teenager gets the allure of the dark emo boy wearing all black with the tortured past, i’ve been there!!! i did my time!!!!!!  -i am still doing my time. we’ve all seen kaz.  -and yes i suppose ben barnes is. good-looking. -look it’s the beard. i just hate that beard. -and the darkling and alina are, not an interesting pair, but interesting halves  -two people with completely opposite powers, one who knows how to use them and has for centuries and the other who just discovered them, both the exact match for the other in terms of dark/light and scope of ability and lifespan, who are looking for a place of belonging but also a place of power  -and then he puts a collar on her to use her as his own personal weapon and their possible existence on even playing ground stops, cementing the gap in power dynamics that has been there from the start in their relationship, and always would be, and confirming him as manipulative power-hungry jackass #1 who doesn’t care about grisha or ravka but himself  -and he deserves what he gets in the end. (both times, even!!!!)  -so much so that the demon in the wood is included in the back of ruin and rising and when i got to it i was like ‘okay but the dude’s dead now so i don’t care about this sudden backstory i am being given’ and i did not read it. to this day. i have not. 

-also the darkling kisses alina like he’s physically attacking her and you know what??? that tracks, i guess 

-i love the heartbeat in the scenes with a heartrender!!! i think that was a nice touch.  -i also love all the little hints about jesper being grisha 

-i don’t remember much about zoya in the trilogy since most recently i read rule of wolves but i do not recall zoya sleeping around with everybody and i don’t like it  -zoya’s very proud but??? even there she kind of kept to herself, didn’t she  -she literally has a million better things to be doing than fucking everybody  -and they just fling zoya’s aunt out there???? sure fine whatever  -we get zero good zoya content and then you just give that  -and now she and alina are friends enough for her to say a witty pithy hero statement?????????  -uggggg 

-we saw luda for a hot second so i do not care about her!!!!!  -must it always be For The Death Of A Woman 

-“most grisha aren’t fighters. they fix things, they make things.” wow i love that line a whole lot 

-inej is just gonna sew the wound herself!!!! a legend!!!!!!  -and then inej just STABBING THE DARKLING and kaz BONKING A VOLCRA ON THE HEAD -i love them with my whole stupid heart i love them  -like.......something something the best characters in this bright stunning magic world are the non-magical characters vibing on an entirely different plotline  - ~wring magic out of the ordinary~ 

-it is necessary to have the bones under alina’s skin. no  -noooooooooooooooooooo -noooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!! 

-mal saying “you’ll wish you killed me here!” oh boy yeah he will!!!!! also, you tell him, mal 

-milo coming in HOT  -goat ex machina 

-“telling you half a story is not the same as lying” what are you, a child???? -man alina fucking slam dunks him in the tent! good for her. 

-i love snarky characters but again. jesper does it ALL THE TIME that his lines start to sound repetitive or he’s just doing snarky plot nutshelling 

-“remember who’s driving” WHAT ARE YOU, A CHILD?????? -in the last two episodes specifically i was like ‘WHAT is with this dialogue???’

-alina: /reaching for mal on the skiff  me: are you gonna. do the hint  me: oh well it’s fine if you don’t, alina deserves that 

-actually, i would kill for The New Crew of kaz, inej, jesper, alina, mal, and zoya -what a team..........what a time......... me: kaz is gonna say the thing he’s gonna say it kaz: the deal is the deal me: /fingerguns at the tv 

-oh re: is kaz too soft here  -................................actually yeah, maybe a little 

-with kaz having the hair pin instead of alina and mal selling the pin(s) for money, how will the darkling find alina? -not necessarily a BAD thing. just a thought 

-overall, did i like it??????? i don’t know!! some things were enjoyable!! sure failed at A WHOLE FUCKING LOT, THOUGH  -i do know i’m gonna reread six of crows, though 

-i just had a terrible thought. if we get a season 2 and they do the sea whip there's gonna be so many dawn treader jokes, aren't there. 

[captainsassmanes]

Trissshhhhh I have a dialogue prompt for you from that list, and bc you know I freaking love angst. “Take me instead” for Malex

Warnings: This one is heavy. Tw: violence, descriptions of injuries, torture, cursing, Jesse Fucking Manes.

Alex’s vision blurred and he realized, slower than he would have liked, that he could see nothing out of his left eye. He sent out a quick prayer that it was just swelling, nothing permanent. 

What that meant, either way, was that he couldn’t clearly see the blows before they came anymore. Maybe a small blessing. Maybe really shitty luck.

“Did Max Evans heal Elizabeth Ortecho from a bullet wound?”

The voice of who he’d learned was Staff Sargent Mitchell menaced in his ear. 

Alex was in agony. He’d barely eaten in what he figured was weeks, his stomach twisting in a hunger so severe it ached. He’d been beaten everyday, his injuries never having the chance to begin healing. There was a cut on his arm he was sure had become infected and it sat in the perfect spot to send shooting pains straight up his dominant arm every few seconds.

The first few days, maybe a little longer, of his captivity, he’d fought back: pulled against his restraints, spit in Mitchell’s face, laughed in his father’s. He could still remember reasons to be free again and to keep his mouth shut. 

Michael. Kyle. Isobel. Michael. Max. Liz. Michael. Arturo. Mimi. Maria. Michael.

He’d repeat their names when he was alone in his cell, pitch black with the smell of dampness and mold filling his nostrils. He’d pull up memories of them, his brain filtering through them all to feature only the best ones.

Getting high with Maria and laughing for hours. Study sessions with Liz that were more milkshakes and gossip than anything else. Sparing with Isobel, watching confidence radiate off her. Waking up next to Michael, watching the sun light up his tan skin, watching his chest rise and fall, the feel of his chest hair, wiry and thick. The little snores he let out when he slept on his back. The way Michael’s hands felt on his own skin, callused and so full of love.

He never cried from the pain, from the fear, from the threats.

But he’d cried when he thought of Michael.

Eventually, unable to deny it, the reality of the situation set in. Alex figured he’d been held for about two weeks. The meetings with his father, demented, psychological warfare, evolved to insure Alex knew no one was looking for him. No one gave a shit. No one missed him.

Kyle continued to go to work, date his precious, new co-worker. Liz and Max were rekindling their romance while Rosa, who they’d discovered almost instantly, continued to dance in the shadows. Isobel was event planning during the day and, according to sources, blowing up bigger and bigger things in the middle of the night.

And then there were Michael and Maria.

Jesse never hesitated to keep Alex well informed with that relationship. The dates they went on. The visits to see Mimi. The hand holding. The love making. The laughter and the smiles.

It had been just a couple of evenings ago, Alex lying on his back, arm on fire and bleeding from his head, when the tears finally stopped. He pictured Michael and Maria, arms wrapped around one another, eyes locked with wide smiles painted across their beautiful faces. He imagined ease and comfort and simplicity. Kindness and consideration, dedication and loyalty.

“Keep them safe...happy,” Alex whispered to no one.

From that moment on, he tucked it all away; his emotions, his pain, his reactions. He had nothing to give them and refused to yield even an inch.

His eyes met Mitchell’s and Alex made no effort to move. He didn’t shrug or smirk or blink an eye. He would give them nothing.

“What exactly can Isobel Evans do?”

Alex was unmoved. He took the next hit, breathing in through his nose, out through his mouth.

“Can Michael Guerin move objects with his mind?”

Alex felt a small wave of pride as he remained stoic at the mention of Michael’s name.

The next hit knocked him to the ground, the chair he was tied to coming right down with him. The military issues boots hurt like a son of a bitch, Alex feeling his insides bruising with each kick, until he couldn’t help but let out the vomit he’d been trying to hold back.

“Enough, Mitchell. Stand down.”

The kicking stopped as Mitchell took a few steps back and stood at attention. Jesse came to stand before him, feet still and silence filling the room.

“Pick him up.”

When they came face to face, Alex searched. He searched his father’s features for any indication that Jesse felt something, anything.

It was fruitless.

“This is all you’re gonna give us, son?”

Alex raised an eyebrow, not at the question but at the term of endearment.

With a shallow breath, ribs screaming in protest, he mumbled, “you’ve already taken everything. I’m not giving you shit. Dad.”

Jesse nodded, a familiar look of disappointment in his eyes. “Very well.”

The walk down the long hall felt surprisingly freeing. Alex knew this was it, the end of his journey. Jesse and whoever else was working for him had done what they could to get any information out of him. They must have realized he wouldn’t speak and no one cared enough to try to save him.

So it was time.

He wondered briefly if the stories his mom used to tell him as a boy were true. A great warrior may be able to rest in a peaceful, safe afterlife, or maybe reincarnate as human again to try once more, to live another noble life. Or, perhaps, his sins were too great. He’d end up falling into an abyss for eternity or come back but as a roach or something.

Truthfully, he’d never given much thought to death. Losing his leg had changed that a bit but he still did what he could to focus on the present, moment to moment. Maybe that helped him now. He still felt more curious than afraid.

Alex just hoped for peace.

As the small group turned the final corner, he was pushed back as the sound of guns cocking echoed through the space.

He craned his neck, trying to see what had happened, but couldn’t see past the mammoth solider in front of him.

“Stand down. Now. Hands up.”

“Aw, c’mon now, boys. No way to greet a visitor, is it?”

Alex stumbled a bit, head spinning and heart racing. It wasn’t possible. Not now when he was ready.

If he was being honest, there were nights, bitter, lonely, angry nights when he hated his friends, hated Michael for leaving him, abandoning him completely when he needed them most. He wasn’t the best friend but he did what they needed, helped where he could, took the blows he was dealt. And it got him what? Kidnapped. Left to be tortured and die. Alone.

But once he’d rested, once the blood stopped pulsing so loudly in his ears, he knew it was best. It was what he truly wanted. He’d never want Michael or the Evans’ to risk their safety, their secret, for him. And his other friends, they wouldn’t stand a chance against these fucking sadists.

It was best for all of this to end with him.

But now, as Michael stood in the space that was meant for Alex’s last moments, he couldn’t think.

“You’re nothing in here, Mr. Guerin.” His father’s voice was laced with condescension and excitement.

“Take me instead.”

Alex stopped breathing. Michael’s voice sounded calm and even, bordering on arrogant if that was possible with at least six guns pointed at him. Alex tried to speak but Mitchell beat him.

“If you haven’t noticed, asshole, you’re already taken.”

The sound of Michael’s laugh hit Alex’s ears and, beyond all reason, he smiled. That sound was so rare Alex couldn’t help but treasure it every time, even in the most dire of circumstances.

“Am I?” He felt the soldiers in front of him shift, a sudden change in the air. “Tell me, Master Sargent, why are you under the impression that I’m nothing?”

Alex grit his teeth and grimaced with the pain as he stretched as tall as he could. His eyes locked with Michael’s and Alex knew. There had been a plan. Thank fuck Michael had a plan.

The urge to sob and be held against Michael’s chest, wrapped in his strong arms was overwhelming.

“This place is so loaded with powder you won’t be able to shift a paper clip you fucking freak.”

Alex watched as Michael’s curls danced, moving with the nodding of his head.

“Yikes. I guess I didn’t realize. But I do have one more question.” He pointed to himself as he added, “curious by nature.”

He watched the hands of the soldier in front of him begin to shake, fingers gripping his weapon a bit too tightly. Alex smirked. Maybe they were starting to put it together.

With a voice suddenly full of anger and vitrol, Michael asked the room, “how the fuck do you think I got in here?”

In the blink of an eye, a force Alex couldn’t see pushed him against the wall, air leaving him with the strength of it. He gazed in wonderment, as if watching a movie or a perfect moment of a play, as the soldiers firearms all turned to white doves, flying confused and frightened around the space.

Each soldier died without Michael needing to move a muscle, his face unchanged, although his eyes had shifted from a stunning hazel to completely black. Alex thought he’d never looked better.

When the final man fell to the floor in a bloody pile, Michael turned that black, empty gaze to Alex. Jesse floated out of the room, chin lifted and struggling for air, and into the hall, toes barely touching the now stained linoleum.

Alex understood Michael’s silent question.

With difficulty, Alex stood, discovering his restraints had literally vanished. He met his father’s glare, searching one, last time for some semblance of shame, regret, sadness. He found nothing but disgust and hatred.

Cradling his core, Alex stood straight, the Manes man his father had always wanted him to be. He didn’t remove his eyes from his fathers and his voice didn’t waiver as he said, “lock him in and blow it up.”

Jesse’s body flew backward and into the room with his ever-obedient team. He landed on the floor, on his hands and knees, coughing and gasping for air.

Michael had moved to stand beside Alex, eyes now the stunning gold he normally wore, and took Alex’s bloody, broken hand in his.

“Don’t worry, Jesse.” Michael brought Alex’s hand up to his mouth and placed a delicate, gentle kiss to the back of it, mouth coming away scarlet with blood. “I’ll take good care of him.”

Jesse snarled and moved to stand before the door slammed shut and locked, Jesse’s screams slipping under the space of the door.

Alex stood, stunned, that it was finally over, that Michael was here, that Jesse would be gone, that he would live.

“We’ve gotta go.”

Alex nodded but didn’t move.

“Will you, Michael?”

“Will I what, Alex?”

He was too exhausted to keep the break from his voice. “Take care of me.”

Michael smiled as Alex felt his body become immeasurably lighter, moving without making any effort at all. Michael wrapped an arm around Alex and pulled him into his side.

“Forever if you’ll let me.”

Alex never imagined his happy ending would begin with an explosion.

[captaincoffeegirl515]

6 Underground Thoughts!

I'm literally gonna talk about pretty much the entire movie so lots and lots of spoilers under the read more. 

If you've already seen the movie, I would love to talk and debate and scream excitedly about the movie with you! 

P.S. This got way longer than I expected.

I gotta say I really enjoyed the movie. Of course, there's some problems and continuity errors, etc. but I'll get to them after. 

First of all, I love all the interactions between them. Found-family trope is my jam.

One and Four

Four looks up to One and seems like he tries to impress him. 

He also calls One a likeable asshole.

"See that? That's called skill." Show off. 

One was the one Four called to for help even though they all knew his way of leaving you behind if you can't keep up. And he stepped up and saved Four! That whole scene was so good! 

I will admit though that how they first met is messed up. One basically kidnapped him, tied him down, and made Four think he was gonna shoot and kill him. Seven got it down when he called them a "family more screwed up than mine" 

Two and Three

Badass lady and himbo (does Three count as a himbo?). Enough said.

I love every interaction they had together. I enjoyed their bickering and how they showed how they cared in their own way.

Tiny touches! The part near the end when Three lightly touches Two’s arm and she takes her hand out of her pocket so they could hold hands?! Nice.

When Two said "I would love to meet your mother." awwww! The way Three just brightens up!

Four and Seven

OTP! I never expected to come out with one, but here we are.

Look, I just love the concept of the free-spirited parkour expert being with the disciplined military operator. 

Seven just immediately seemed to take Four under his wing and genuinely care about his well-being. 

The others also expressed how they didn't want to leave Four behind but only Seven fought for them to stop. 

Saved Four's life not once, but twice! It was almost instinctual and he didn't hesitate to do it. 

"You're calling me Mister Seven from now on" Seven's inner dom coming out lol. 

The names scene! "I'm Blaine. I just saved your life. What's your name?" and instead of listening to One’s order, he answers. 

"Yeah, you look like a Billy." 

Seven and One

One always kept his distance from everyone, used numbers instead of names so he wouldn't get attached, and had that horrid "can't keep up, get left behind" rule. So glad that Seven pushed back, from making the shot to save Four from both drowning and from falling to his death, questioning his rules about leaving people behind, and getting them all (except One, sadly) to say their real names. 

Seven brought out One's heart and finally made him start to actually care for his team aka family. Like I'm certain that if it wasn't for him, One would have definitely left Four to die in Hong Kong and on the boat during the coup.

"You've got a soul, man. You should let it out." 

Movie highlights and thoughts:

I called it! Like based on the screen time and focus on them from the trailers, I already knew Six was the most likely one to die and Four would probably be injured at worst. 

The fucking dialogue in the opening! I can't even. Like “I’m gonna put this inside you, really deep.” and "ahhh! She's squirting!" 

"So many fucking Vias in Italy." I love how it's canon that Four isn't that good with maps and would definitely get lost in Italy. Actually he's bad with directions period. "Where are you?" "Here." "Specifics!" "Right here." Four pls

Three trying to learn the language of each new place they go to. The best! 

Did I already say Two is badass? Because she is. She really is. And they're all right when they said she'd be the most likely to survive. 

Four and Six worked so well together in the car chase scenes and Four looked so sad when he saw Six's body in that car. Honestly if Six hadn't died so early in the movie and they got more interactions together, him and Four probably would've been my OTP. 

I did enjoy how One had like momentary vulnerability like when Six died or when Four told them to leave him followed by the gunshots, etc. Those little moments where you can see that he did have feelings before he shoves them deep down and focuses back on the mission. 

Best outfit is Four in that big white sweater with the red stripes. He looked so good. 

I found the scene where Four asks One if he was a pig then spits at him weirdly hilarious. The spitting just felt so random and came out of nowhere. 

Four sleeping is! So! Cute! And when Three starts loudly complaining, he just slowly opens one eye like he's going "are you fucking kidding me right now?!"

Another funny scene was when Four easy runs across the top of the crane and then it pans to the guards chasing him and they have both arms and legs on the crane and just slowly inching their way across. 

Guy jokes about Noor. "Noor is dead. Say he's dead." "No, he's dead. He died." "Wait no. Wrong guy. He's alive!" jfc that was funny! 

The coup song is so fire! I love it! Nice choice, Four. 

Four's scream when that guy broke his arm just kills me. I kinda wish One made that guy's death a bit more painful and drawn out but I get that they were under some serious time constraints.

Actually any part where Four gets hurt... noooo bb

Now that I think about it, the fact that they have comms throughout the mission, like they can hear everything the others say, they can hear each other when they're fighting, when they get hit, everything. They heard when Three got shot in the face and Seven panicked, thinking that he just killed him. They heard Four screaming in pain when his arm broke and they couldn't do anything since they weren't there. 

Seriously though, Ben's acting is so good! He's easily the best part of the movie. And his eyes! So green and so expressive! 

“Fuck you!” “Fuck you!” “No you, fuck you!” jfc One and Three are hilarious together.

It was such a great scene when One told them he wouldn't go after Rovach bc he's going to save Four. Just. My heart. And "You’re breaking your own rules. I thought you didn't have a family". And Five's soft smile.

Four and Five are rock climbing buddies! Both their smiles can outshine the sun. They're so cute! (even though in the close-ups you can tell the rock is very obviously fake)

Ben and Adria are both so hot my little bi heart is ready to burst! 

Also, how is Micheal Bay saying this movie isn't political? They had the US gov’t staging coups in third world countries and putting dictators into power, Russia arming Rovach and his military, chemical warfare, Rovach's whole speech to his generals about hitting where he is weakest like hospitals and schools, the "our president doesn't know how to spell Turgistan" line, revolution, overthrowing dictators, throwing Rovach down to the people for them to deal their own brand of justice, etc. There were so many things that just screamed politics!

Issues:

Holy hell the kill count of this movie is just insane. It becomes over the top so fast. Same with all the gratuitous gore.

Shaky af camera work. 

Literally every explosion looked like those sparky fireworks. What. 

Lots of continuity errors. Six having a disappearing and reappearing hat throughout the chase scene. Basically any scene involving water. Like Four and Two get completely soaked at one point, but in the next scene, they're completely dry. Or the part where Four is hanging upside down on the net and big dude is trying to untangle him so he’d fall but when it cuts back to them when Seven makes the shot, it's back to the part where the guy was choking Four. 

Did anyone else notice all the skid marks on the roads even though they haven't officially driven on it yet? Didn't have enough budget left to remove or edit out the marks from all the rehearsals they did? 

And why is One hanging the eyeball right over the phone screen? That's not where the camera is dude!

Did Two and Three seriously have sex with all those dead people around?! Shouldn't they be running since they killed the 4 generals and guards would likely be on their way?? 

Also, Ben's stunt double was obvious in almost every parkour stunt. Wow. 

Why no Five backstory! I wanna know how she ended up joining the team!

They did Five dirty! She barely has lines or scenes, they took out her backstory, and gave her little to no character growth. 

I know they're hinting at Four and Five getting together, but I just don't see it. They have barely any romantic chemistry together. Eye contact and smiling is not chemistry. It just isn’t. 

[advernia]

the world in her heart, her heart in his hands

assorted sidenotes for the fic i made in response to an anon-sent aesthetic prompt! oooh boy, i sure took long on this one lmao...... _(:3 」∠)_

prompt #7: steady notes coming from a guitar nearby, fireflies dancing around the clearing, two sleeping bags close together, and a bright full moon briefly covered by a cloud.

so the core idea i had when i saw that prompt got requested was based on jonah’s say i do! route: he says that one day, he wanted to go to the land of reason + see the place alice was born and raised. tbh idk how the prompt even led me to that, but the imagery vibes i got from the prompt hinted of something like freedom. or something like lovers secretly meeting in the woods, which i sort of went by.

OKAY SO I SWEAR I FINISHED WRITING THE PROMPT (day zero!!!) EARLY (by my standards) LMAO.............. like, maybe a week after i got the ask or so? but then when i went about proofreading it i felt that it was... lacking??? i can’t explain it myself, but i didn’t wanna post it yet until i got that feeling cleared out - i tried revising + adding, but it didn’t help so i just started thinking about expanding the fic instead...

thinking about the scenes really took longer than i thought?!?!?! i wanted this request up early but i was stumped on what kind of scenes i wanted to see + how their lengths were gonna be.... plus i was thinking if i should go solely on narration + description........ or maybe more of dialogue...... then i jumped to holy shit what’s my timeline gonna be what cultural whatnot am i gonna emphasize and i think i fussed over those aspects rather than picturing the actual scenes LMAOOO.......................

great disclaimer: i have NEVER stepped into the uk..... or england + london for that matter ahahaha GET REKT tho i want to someday huehuehue....... i heavily relied my research on maps + history websites + train timetables to help me get through the touring parts so do forgive me if i messed up somewhere + butchered history haha..... i was thinking to make things vague, but since i’m always in for emphasizing the differences between cradle + land of reason, i decided to get a little technical with it......

i have to admit that i wrote most of the fic during breaks in work hELLA RAD........... i’m doing my job properly, i swear........ it’s just that when i already have a stable idea of what i want to happen, the scene becomes clearer in my mind. i wanted so! badly! to add scenes of jonah pronouncing words and looking at various things funny!!! jonah and his attempts to communicate with londoners!!! fussy jonah poking around a boutique, him being fascinated + studying displays of gun shops, or him accidentally offending the royal guard + constables LMAOOOOO but i couldn’t seem to write anything satisfactory involving those ideas........... ಥ_ಥ

back to the issue of timeline, i was picturing the london in this fic to be around the 1860s or smth.... but then i remembered that in edgar’s dramatic end letter, he mentions his fascination with electricity aka lightbulbs......... which were, like...... discovered early 1800s but only became common in 1882 ahahaha....... when i realized this i was already writing day 18 oOOPS so i just decided to go on and wing it I’M SORRY _(:3 」∠)_

on timeframe, i know that it’s very highly unlikely that jonah would take a vacation for two months. i bet the mere concept of a one-month vacation is enough to give him a heart attack LMAOOOO but let’s just say that red army told him to take his time in the land of reason, especially when they learn that jonah plans to formally meet alice’s parents. when he hears about this, lancelot tosses in the suggestion of proposing to alice while they’re in the land of reason, so that jonah can tell her parents about that too. jonah thinks it’s a fantastic idea..... so he decides to accept hot damn, a two month vacation!

whole route & lengths of stay (points streaked with red are mentioned within the fic minus nottingham whoops sorry):

london [16 days bc IT’S A BIG CITY LMAO (day 30 - 14). rides a morning train going to bristol on the 14th, arrives there midday.]

bristol [5 days (day 14 - 9). leaves bristol on the morning of the 9th to walk all the way to glastonbury, arrives there come late afternoon / evening.]

glastonbury [4 days (day 9 - 5). leaves midday of the 5th to walk their way to alice’s village, arrives there around sunset.]

alice’s village / ‘actual wonderland’ lmao [5 days (day 5 - 0). located somewhere in between bridgwater, taunton, and glastonbury. month 1 of vacation has ended.]

day log commentary!

thirty. arrival in the land of reason through falling - routes where alice does go back don’t feature her falling down london’s sky, so maybe she’s just... spit out from the hole????? idk haha so i altered it anyway!!!!! the landing scene was initially like this: jonah lands first, he catches alice in his arms, they banter a bit....... and then they suddenly remember the suitcase only for said object to fall right on jonah’s head LMAOOO....... it’s a cradle magical object that looks like a regular suitcase but will always be as light as a feather despite it’s contents + it has GREAT CAPACITY so jonah is actually okay!!!!!! i decided to scrap that scene concept though haha!

twenty-nine. does the hole to the land of reason only open around midnight or smth???? i’m sure it doesn’t, but i went with jonah + alice leaving cradle minutes before twelve o’clock, so when they arrive in london jonah gets to see the big ben signal midnight. is that planned on alice’s part? maybe. on another note, i’m assuming that a high-ranking officer + noble like jonah is definitely used to traveling to other countries so he’s definitely not one for homesickness, but i like the thought of him always feeling all sorts of uncomfortable on his first nights away from home - he doesn’t make a big deal about it bc he gets better three days in or so. idk, it just seems fitting for someone very particular like him.

twenty-seven. if luka’s hair is fucking dyed, my god (no wonder i found those light ends of his hair sorta funny), then here’s jonah excuse to adapt another hair color with the help of magic crystals LMAO - i always stick with a reality ensues standpoint, so his ikeman looks aside, i’m sure londoners would find jonah’s hair color (heck, maybe even his eye color) very unique. alice can’t deal with all that sudden attention lol but she somewhat proud that the man who has effortlessly captured the attention of the people of her world too is the man she proudly calls her lover ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

twenty-three. now that i think of it, what exactly does cradle mean when they say the land of reason? are they simply referring to the city of london, or earth as a whole??? most likely the latter, but i’m pretty sure no one except blanc (and possibly ray bc that globe in his room lol) know exactly how large the land of reason is. anyway, not gonna lie, i wanted jonah + alice talking about novels by maybe the likes of charles dickens, thomas hardy, george eliot or h.g. wells. heck, maybe jane austen and charlotte bronte too!!!! but i had to scrap that bc gaps in understanding cultural & historical references + use of language, figurative and non-figurative.... it’s a shame about the last two though - i’m sure jonah can somehow probably relate to the society depicted in their books since the red territory sounds like your typical breeding place of victorian era nobles lmao!!!!

eighteen. sometimes when people learn / gain a deeper understanding about new things, they have the urge to brag about said knowledge to others - of course jonah wants to show alice what he knows about her world so far haha! calling a train a mechanical beast tho lmao..... he refers to it that way, but i think it’s his target of fascination in london!!! noise and possibly environmental issues aside, it’s very convenient + efficient and can cater to all, but what he finds most impressive that it’s a man-made locomotive!!! that’s something worth incredible praise!!! ( ᐛ )و

fourteen. actual train ride!!! hmmm.... i think jonah only panics maybe a good thirty minutes in when the train starts moving??? alice tries to calm him down by pointing at the passing scenery out the window + idle chatter until jonah finally relaxes himself.... but then he starts to panic slightly again when alice suggests that they look around the train and he’s like: is that even remotely safe??? what about our baggages, can we leave them unattended??? hey, i saw you snicker - how dare you laugh at me!!!

nine. according to google, an estimate of a walk starting from bristol going to glastonbury is 8h 25min. that’s for the present time though - would’ve it been shorter or longer in the past??? idk, but definitely one’s pace during the walk affects the total time, lol. since railroads only started out around 1830s + i made alice a village girl, walking really is her way to go. pedestrianism was still a thing around the 19th century!!! her stamina in other routes tho lol (ﾟ⊿ﾟ)

six. here’s my self-indulgent thing of wanting to add a dance scene, pt. 1 LMAOOOO -   the steps in the scene aren’t really from a certain folk dance in england, much less from glastonbury itself... i did look up on england folk dances, but i couldn’t pick one that i wanted to incorporate into the scene so i went with describing some random steps on the top of my head _(:3 」∠)_ ..... maybe someday, i’ll write a proper one..... on another note though, i suppose jonah can adapt quickly to folk dances, but he may come off a bit stiff at first in line / column dances where there’s the switch of partners??? i mean, there are formal 19th century dances that have that same concept, but.... the finesse + personal boundaries are all there lmao -  he’s not against the casual intimacy + show of obvious joy in folk + common dances though, it’s just more of that he’s not used to the informality of it all, i think.

five. plot twist: alice does lead jonah to her home, the cottage on a hill like she always described, but what he doesn’t expect is when she solemnly says that she’d introduce him to her parents she leads him to the back of the hill and in the foot of the hill he finds himself staring at her parents’ gravestones as she’s smiling sadly with a bouquet of flowers in her hand OH WAIT WRONG GENRE WASN’T THIS SUPPOSED TO BE FLUFF LMAO - kidding aside, i do hope cybird catches onto the idea of a story event of chosen suitor going to the land of reason with alice to meet her parents or smth!!! they did do a travel event in the jp ver, after all.... but i’m not keeping my hopes up haha....... _(:3 」∠)_

zero. self-indulgent thing of wanting to add a dance scene, pt. 2 - tho it’s in the latter part along with the prompt lmao!!! hmmm, i’m pretty satisfied with how this one turned out tho i had a little problem arranging the first half - the rest i relatively left untouched even after i added the rest of the days to the fic. hopefully, does well as a nice end to the fic itself..... tbh, the thought of summer dress alice + casual shirt & pants jonah both barefoot & running around like children in moonlit woods (don’t do this in real life folks) made me smile a lot. give me more soft-and-not-so-tooth-rotting-fluff scenes, cybird

also!!! since the prompt involved a guitar, i had a certain track on repeat lmao - you can listen to it here, and it’s the second to the last track titled umibe ni yurete (swaying in the beach)! (ノ^∇^)

and that’s all that i’ve got today!!! thank you very much for reading + hope you’re staying safe & well wherever you are!!!!（｡≧◇≦）ﾉ

[callmcgills]

werner ziegler 😭

! major BCS spoilers from this point on !

Werner (send me a character and I’ll list…)

thank you for giving me an excuse to dump my emotions! THAT SAID:

*sits on the sidewalk* *screams into my hands*

favorite thing about them

a huge part of me liking him is his duality between professionalism and goofiness. (“for my father, it was his achievement. a creation that will endure,” and “very good! now you use your thinking head, not your drinking head!” are lines from the same episode) i also liked how he was an architectural genius, but was downright incapable of thinking ahead when his smarts were applied to any other situation. but most importantly, i like him because he had so much heart that he was KILLED OVER IT!!! the crimes he was killed over were being friendly/proud of his work, escaping the warehouse because he’s tired and wants to be with someone he loved, and trusting someone to be honest!!!!!!! Rainer Bock also gave a great portrayal which definitely helped too

also, relevant: i went from liking Werner to being absolutely invested after he had a panic attack in Wiedersehen, and then it hard cut to him walking back into the room with a smile.

least favorite thing about them

to this day i still have to watch the pool-side scene in Winner while peaking through my fingers. partly because Werner WHY did you have to BLAB AGAIN! but mostly because, well… i’m glad Werner didn’t have to die in those clothes. i also can’t let it go unstated that Werner most likely did know he was working on something w/ criminal ties. but w/ the way Werner acted, he CLEARLY must have thought that Gus and Mike were just storing illegal fireworks or something

favorite line

“Ah, not true. He also left you, Michael. You are his legacy.” Werner doesn’t think Mike needs a grand accomplishment to be worthy of being called a legacy. he could have just said “oh, that’s a shame” about Mike’s previous line, but instead he tells Mike that he’s good enough just for existing. and that’s incredibly meaningful and sweet. (but Mike laughs, because he’s a murderer. his son’s death is on his hands. some legacy he is! and if Werner knew, he wouldn’t be saying that. then, har har har, Werner is killed by him.)

close runner up: “Now say Mittagsschläfchen,” and literally every other line in that scene. for example: “How do you say bullshit?” “Hmm, bullshit.” his dialogue with Mike was gold.

brOTP

Werner and the construction crew. They Are His Sons. the reason Werner said ‘once, maybe’ about if he wanted to have kids was because living w/ someone like Kai for 9 months was enough

if that’s too obvious an answer… Gale and Werner. “wow. i mean, it’s incredible. […] an architectural feat. herculean.” RETCON WERNER’S DEATH SO THEY CAN DRINK COFFEE TOGETHER!!!

OTP

throwback to when i said ‘wehrmantraut endgame’ to myself during Coushatta. those were simpler times.

nOTP

Werner/Kai. a very hard nOTP at that. i haven’t seen anyone ship it, but the Mere Concept is enough to squick me out. and if i’m being frank, Werner/any of the six people in his team. i can’t see Werner’s relationship w/ them as anything other than familial.

random headcanon

i’ve put a lot of thought into this, because i’m working on (more like… planning but avoiding actually writing) a construction crew-centric fic. and since i only have 1 piece of backstory info and a piece of lint to go off of for Werner, i realized i had to fill in some of the blanks! here’s a piece of what i came up with!

i think his father’s work would’ve left a negative impact on Werner. if Werner’s in his 50s, then when he was a kid his father was working on what would be The Most Important Project Of His Life, and he wasn’t able to interact w/ his family often. this would put Werner in an uncomfortable position – being upset about his father being so busy would mean he was being “ungrateful.” his father was sacrificing so much and working so hard, after all!! his attire and work methods might reflect that he’s almost replicating his father in a way. he’s almost deliberately old fashioned, even for someone his age. contrast w/ the French engineer, or even Mike, who is more adaptable to the point he notices dead pixels and what was used to create them

it can’t be good for anyone to have a parent who is constantly busy w/ their “achievement” during some of the most important years of your development. and imagine at least one of your parents being more of a legend than a family member! you’d internalize unrealistic expectations of yourself and flat out wrong ideas of what’s good enough, and you’d look at every moment in your life using that parent’s experiences as a frame of reference. you’re constantly comparing your experiences. not in a “am i as good as them?” kind of way, but in a “in terms of work, i don’t have it NEARLY as hard as they did, so i must be grateful for [X]” way. you also can’t complain about anything that’s given to you, because at least you didn’t have to aid in revolutionizing architecture and construct a new type of concrete arch

while Werner clearly said “you are his legacy” as a way to make Mike look at things more optimistically (and because he really meant it) you have to wonder what him choosing that word says about how he thinks of himself. if you are your parent’s legacy – working in their occupation, even – does that mean just the fact that you exist is good enough, or does that mean you can’t let your existence as a legacy go to waste? of course, when he said it to Mike he meant the former, but that’s not necessarily how the child of someone like his father applies that message to himself.

unpopular opinion

i’ve noticed a lot of people saying that Werner was “stupid for not realizing the severity of his situation” and thinking he’d be able to go back to work after escaping. in my opinion, Mike screwed up by not clearly defining the rules to him. his death was unfair, but even more so because he was punished for breaking the rules to a game he didn’t know he was playing. Gus is playing 4D Chess, and Werner was playing Jenga at a completely different table.

as far as Werner knew, all that mattered was that the work got done and that it got done in secrecy. after all, i don’t imagine any of his other employers would have killed him for what was just a day off. it doesn’t matter how much Werner knew about his job, your instinct isn’t to believe you are going to be murdered for leaving your workplace. not when every single job you’ve had hasn’t worked that way. and that’s where the communication problems spring from, almost every other job Mike has had did work that way, so to Mike the implications were clear and he didn’t need to clarify what “think about who you’re working for” meant.

Werner lacked the context: that Gus was playing a long con that ran deeper than just what they’re building. while Werner believed what they were building was the most important part – and thus no harm no foul in leaving for a few days because the work was going to get done – it was really the revenge and end game that mattered, which meant everyone was replaceable and expendable. especially when they blab to a Salamanca. so it’s about more than whether he knew the people he worked for were dangerous, it’s about the fact he was wrong about what the priorities were.

song i associate with them

Miles, by Mother Mother. a post-Wiedersehen song

“Miles / and miles / and miles / Before we reach the sand / Cacti / and cacti /  for miles / miles of dry land, dry land / We gonna make it / Oooh we gonna make it / We gonna take it / Oooh we gonna take it / Easy / Once we feel the sea breezeMy my my my my my my lover / My maker / My breaker / Take me by the hand / We could go walking for miles / Once we reach the sand / the sand”

favorite picture of them 

A Very Tender Photo Taken One Episode Before Disaster

bonus: an excerpt from an IM w/ kiraalexander, after they filled me in on what Werner did during the finale

[elizabethrobertajones]

I'm behind on meta so please feel free to ignore this if it's been already talked about, but I thought it was interesting how - as weird or sort of unusual that fight scene was with dean and the demon, or at least i don't recall anything like it - by making it look sexual and obviously violent, it kinda parallelled Mary's struggle with that asshole hunter. What weirds me out is that it puts Sam & Lucifer in the same role of saviour which is never good, but maybe they just wanted to connect them

like that bc they both want a connection w/ Jack, maybe even see themselves in Jack, who knows lucifer;s side, since they were unable to provide dialogue 4 him besides repeating how Mary is weak bc she gets tired & is all humany and they need to get out and he might need her. ANYWAY, shitty writing aside, do u think it was a parallel and if so what are they trying to say? Was it to show that maybe Sam’s intentions aren’t the purest either, not in an evil way but like bc he’s so intent on gettingMary back that he might be blind - for different reasons than Dean - to Jack as a person? He’s trying so hard & almost doesn’t even entertain the thought that Jack might be corrupted by his power at some point, or by Hell which we see almost happens bc of lack of info. Sam seems to hold on to as much hope as he can, while Dean is at the opposite end of the spectrum (hmm I wonder who could balance it out?). But what do you think of Sam having been weirdly aligned w/ Hell like, he even unwittinglygave the info to Amodeous about how powerful Jack is, while Dean, without even trying, seems to be Jack’s role model for Good (& I love how Jack has a Dean decoder built in) and he even throws him a Bible to read (which, if presented without commentary can be risky, he’s better off reading the Supernatural books, but still, it’s the Holy Book).

Hi! What an ask :D Also I am ALSO so behind on meta so I’m just going to answer this like it’s all new to us, sorry everyone who has already been over this, me and anon are going through this together ;)

To go through chronologically because I’m super tired so I need to break this down…

Yeah, awesome weird fight scene. I loved it - Tink said something about them having a new fight coordinator? There’s been 2 incredible fights back to back for Dean so far and I’m loving it. This one was great I think with the director as well - I feel like he of all of them takes liberties with BL scripts and puts in extra nuance and missing implications that their writing didn’t pick up… He’s 99% responsible for the crypt scenes for example, and in 11x21 included ALL the nuance that made the longing retcon magic happen between Amara, Cas and Dean, just by visual implications. He also super digs the prison imagery and bunker porn and generally using the locations really well… I don’t know much about all the different directors but I’ve learned that seeing his name means it’s time to get excited and nerdy about what I’m going to SEE :D

So yeah, good combo. It made a great parallel with Mary’s fight which I liked first of all just for the Mary and Dean paralleling, especially as she needs connections back to the main storyline just for asserting she still exists, because as you say it was pretty bad writing especially around Mary in that episode, where she just dragged herself around after Lucifer and needed saving. Putting Dean in a parallel situation somewhat defuses it in overall handling of the nonsense, even if I don’t like that it was written this way in the first place. I have still not had time to explore my dash much but I hope people have been making posts about the parallels to female fight scenes, especially Black Widow in the marvel movies… In my notes I just commented he was straddling people to death and left it at that (even though that obviously wasn’t what he was doing - it was a shorthand for the fight style :P) but really it also mirrored 10x15 and Dean in that weirdly charged scenario with whatisface, where he got straddled and had the worm coming out Cole’s throat while leaning over him etc and it put Dean in a very submissive role to all that. In the same way, having Dean fight back by getting his legs around the guy and ending the fight literally *cowering* on a bed with the demon standing over him with the phallic knife, was a fascinating staging of power dynamics where he actually looked more vulnerable than Mary did.

I think Lucifer nice guy’d it - he said he needed Mary and when she wouldn’t go along with him, immediately started whining more and hurt Mary just to make her complacent and remind her that he was still in charge and more powerful than her. Sam of course has no such dynamic with Dean, but I think overall he’s going to be more assertive this season and carrying on - according to the PR - with having more of a leadership role in the dynamic. He’s definitely making the better choices right now while Dean urgently needs a personal day or six. So I think first and foremost it’s a compare and contrast rather than a direct parallel. There’s a great gifset I reblogged somewhere or other about Lucifer in 12x23 saying hurr blurr I can’t raise my son from a prison cell, and then Sam in the cell with Jack just captioned “HOLD MY BEER”, and Sam currently is the only positive father figure - and actually the ONLY father figure *on the board* for Jack, since the pool is Cas - dead, Lucifer - in the AU, Dean - not interested right now… Meaning Jack is pretty much Sam’s sole responsibility and the Lucifer vs Sam stuff may be being played as an oppositional thing. So Lucifer being a dick to Mary after saving her but doing it conditionally and in an attempt to make her go along with him (and that he only wants her to trade for Jack anyway) vs Sam just saving Dean because they love and trust each other already forevers and there being no terms and conditions except for not wanting his brother dead for well duh reasons is… nice. 

But yeah it does also put Sam in a weird place where he’s being paralleled to Lucifer in any way and he has that long history with him. And I think by and large this is supposed to be positive for Sam and all but I agree with you that Sam can and maybe will fuck it up, and being oblivious to the dangers is the main way. In the “Donatello” conversation he doesn’t notice that Donatello switched from “Jack’s nature wins” to “let’s try moulding him” which was Asmodeus’s idea (and Sam’s) - but because Asmodeus was AGREEING with Sam and Sam was assuming he meant for the better, then he didn’t notice that Donatello was suddenly agreeing with him.

I think it’s pretty inevitable Jack’s going to have some sort of wobble - we’ve seen Lucifer is a tiny bit in his head even if he already picked Cas as his father and it’s clear he has a good heart, Asmodeus showed how easily some trickery and the path of good intentions can open a portal to hell (aww season 4 Sam) and that is something Sam himself has to deal with and his his hugest character thing overall - his arc led to that, and then on the other side of it has been about repenting for it and feeling awful that this was what he was basically raised to do >.> He should hopefully be a good influence on Jack to guide him away from repeating his mistakes but only if he can see the problem in the first place.

(Also yeah I love Sam and I’m excited and positive for his relationship with Jack but like you I think we do need to think about the problems, Sam’s lack of experience, this being a complicated time for him to take charge of a thing when historically almost every time he has been in a position of responsibility or strength he’s fucked it up when handling things himself, or else gone down some really dark paths… I think he CAN help Jack and ultimately WILL but that doesn’t mean it might not be rough along the way and I think people need to be prepared for that if they’re getting invested in it… Maybe even more so than the people who want Dean to be good with Jack and are getting upset about how hard it is because in a way that is a much more obvious problem and we were warned about it from the start, while Sam and Jack seems like such a good and pure thing it might be easy to let your guard down that the show can easily insert trouble and darkness into it…)

I wonder if there will be some tension to come between Sam and Dean about Jack kinda latching onto Dean though? Because I’ve wondered before that he is the moral centre of the show and Jack was mimicking him because he’s sort of needing Dean’s approval too, not just in a survival way but because Dean is so SURE of what is right, so being like Dean is default being right. (I think Sam has said something similar in 3x07 about always following Dean around trying to be like him when he was young? In that “i know when you’re scared” argument) And of course Dean being so sure of what is right and Jack not meeting that standard by default has been a massive part of why Jack levelled up in Winchester self-doubt and self-hatred in just a few days. Took less than a week to ruin him and Dean’s standards are probably a large part of it >.> So yeah, I hope Sam understands all the nuance of why Jack might have been mimicking/idolising Dean when Sam is the one trying to be the positive role model to Jack, just because he knows the force of Dean’s personality. I hope he doesn’t take it as a bad reflection on himself, ESPECIALLY if/when Jack fucks up as I feel will inevitably happen. 

I think it does sort of reflect Sam and Dean’s long-standing alignments though… I just remember the season 6 poster where Sam has the snake and Dean has a literal freakin’ halo because subtlety? What is that? :P

[thedegenerateasexual]

chapter 3 opens with stiles lying to coach about scott's whereabouts and listen this dialogue really is spot on like the writing style i don't love but she's got their way of speaking down PAT like their exchange is so funny i wish i could c/p it all

OHHHHH MY GOD FIRST DEREK POV SECTION HELL YEAH THIS IS WHY I'M HERE

teen wolf is over but i still get new officially liscensed derek hale content. this is the last time

mostly this is a recap of the shit kate pulled in 1.05 but also he recalls peter being a prankster with a wicked sense of humor. tbh if only it was that instead of "manipulative dick"

he's still working out bc he wants to be ready to tear her apart ):

ok so he had the same fire dream as scott (despite the fact that he "never dreams" that's pretty interesting idk if i buy it tho) and apparently his woke him up at 3am, "the hour of the wolf" WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN

oh, this is interesting: in his dream, he actually fought the alpha, and while he was thinking "i can't win this" his "wolf brain" (lol) was thinking: "Kill him. Before he kills you. Because he will. He will come at you and at you— / There will be many Alphas, other Alphas; each one you kill will bring another. There will be blood on your hands forever. This one, today; another one, tomorrow. / And on Wolf Moon . . . legions. / Humans will try to destroy you. / If they fail, an Alpha will succeed."

(im copy-pasting from the FFN version to paste long quotes lol i dont wanna retype them. bless whoever decided to do that im only sorry they couldnt get thru all 19 chapters)

anyway this sounds like alpha pack stuff? i would be floored if they had thought that far ahead back in season ONE but theyre doing jackson's parents so maybe they did????

aw, apparently derek has a sleeping bag. this poor guy i hope he's not too uncomfortable ):

OHHH WE'RE GETTING TO THE GOODS we're back to hale fire angst

gonna c/p a long section:

There are a few people I'd like to kill, he thought, but no way would he put himself under the control of an Alpha he didn't even know. And besides, what he'd told Scott was true: as a werewolf, he, Derek, might be a predator, but he wasn't a killer. There was a difference, and anyone who'd been born a werewolf and raised by werewolf parents would know that. Scott had simply been bitten, apparently at random, and if he, Derek, didn't teach him how to deal with it, Scott would wind up either under the control of the Alpha or dead.

Dead, because Derek would kill Scott himself rather than allow him to expose the existence of werewolves to the humans who lived in Beacon Hills. Scott had threatened to tell Chris Argent everything. That was when Derek had taken Scott to see Uncle Peter, make him see that the Argents were ruthless killers. Eleven members of Derek's family had died in the fire that had swept through this house six years ago. Men, women, children. Not all of them werewolves.

And none of them deserving of the hideous, fiery death dealt to them by the Argents.

like...oh my god. derek is truly in a kill or be killed mindset holy shit it's Bad he's like so hellbent on getting revenge!! his anger is using him, not the other way around! like sure  helping him keep control, because he wants it that badly and feels that strongly about it but when you are considering killing sixteen year olds There Is A Problem we do not kill children! that's bad! even the argents SAY they don't kill children and most of them are batshit insane!

would also like to take a moment to appreciate the "i'm a predator but i don't have to be a killer" bit bc that became his anchor in My Fanfiction instead of anger and i love that he says it as early on as s1, repeatedly, what a good choice i made

about kate: "cold-hearted bitch. if ever someone deserved to die..."

and then he immediately growls JUST AT THE THOUGHT OF HER and redoubles his workout routine efforts by switching his push-ups to single-hand so he can be Ready - "or the next time the fire came, it might devour him too"

good GOD we haven't even gotten to the kate angst yet and i'm already feeling #validated this was my exact interpretation of season 1 derek he's a fucking asshole because everybody fucking died and he doesn't want to be next because he's got to avenge them

more interesting werewolf lore via derek's internal monologue: "But that wasn't the entire dream, he reminded himself. I dreamed about other Alphas coming after me. Why? It' s not a crime to kill an Alpha. I'm a werewolf. The way we progress in status is through challenge. If my opponent won't back down, it's within my rights to take what's mine in any way I can. Even death." i...don't think that's how it works really? like by the end of the show alpha are implied to be more like parents and the thing to do is wait for them to pass and have the power be handed down to someone else in the pack like how laura got it after their family died. they're not animals and to people killing another person is a big deal?? i can see why among other reasons they decided this novel wasnt canon

he's so stressed he went out to jog shirtless (an important detail that they felt the need to mention) and now he's monologuing about how even though his life is horrible he wouldn't trade it for the life of a human for ANYTHING i love this born werewolf boy it's just so intricately part of who he is you can't take it out of him anymore than you could take the demon out of jesse he just wouldn't be the same person season 4 must have been so AWFUL for him ))))):

ohhhhhhhhhhh boy. "he used to work off all the extra testosterone by swimming laps. Tthat was how he had met HER"

i read a meta about this and it was not pretty i'm ready to be validated and also very sad

derek smells a real natural not-werewolf somewhere in the forest is it that white one from earlier why is there a wolf in california

haha then derek smelled scott ("spying?!") and got mad and wanted to shift, but he didn't because it's day and you never know who's watching, or plotting. "like i am"

this poor guy he's like so distinctly miserable

i don't really like the STYLE of this writing and i feel like the PLOT is going to be cardboard-thin at best but the CHARACTERS are coming through loud and clear so on that front it's very well done. i actually am enjoying myself a bit which i did not expect

[10monthsandoneday-blog]

Shortaki Week, Day 5:

Discovery / Explosion / Music

Also on Ao3 First, Previous Word count:  7745 (haha whoops, I wrote a novella bc i really couldn’t stop writing, and also as a birthday present to myself) Disclaimer: This is technically an episode rewrite (of Egg Story), but I think I’ve only got a few lines of dialogue directly pulled from the episode and they’re all in the first bit. It veered in a different direction almost from the beginning.  Also...There are two poems in the second half of this, that I wrote myself. mainly bc i love getting inside Helga’s head. seriously i have an entire doc just dedicated to poems from her POV

“Arnold, there you are, I’ve been looking all over for you.”

There was a smile on Helga’s face, a real one, unmean and everything, and Arnold’s resolve to lay down the law with Helga wavered. But he held steadfast for the moment. “Look Helga, before you say anything, I just wanted to let you know that I’ve been thinking, and if we want to work together on this egg project, then we have to--” He paused. Something had finally passed through his head. “Did you just call me Arnold?” he blurted.

“W-well, that’s your name, isn’t it?” Helga’s smile looked a little frail around the edges and she laughed nervously. She was running a finger on top of the egg, over and over. On anyone else, it would be a definitely be a anxious action. But Helga?

“Well, yeah, but you don’t use it very often. Usually it’s Football Head, or Hairboy, or Paste-for-brains, or--”

“I know!” She said loudly, kicking at the seat in front of her. Arnold gave her a disapproving look. He was reminded of what he’d been trying to say before he’d interrupted himself, and he opened his mouth to speak, but Helga got there first.

“Look, A-Arnold. Don’t….don’t read into this too much, but I thought, just for the duration of this project, I might t-try and be n--ni--ni--” She couldn’t seem to get the word out. Arnold took a guess, deciding to be hopeful.

“Nice?”

She snapped her fingers with her free hand and grinned nervously. “That’s the word! I’m gonna try and be nice to you--f-for the sake of our pretend baby, of course.”

There was a weird flutter in Arnold’s stomach at Helga using ‘our’ and ‘baby’ in the same sentence. He decided it was probably fear and packed the thought away. “You’d really be nice?”

“For the sake of the egg. And our grade.” She fidgeted some, though her grip on the egg remained gentle. She looked at him from under lashes and gave a small sigh. “Look, I’ll level with you Arnoldo, I swear I’ll do my best to be nice, if you’ll give me a chance.” She gave a hopeful look, complete with that smile she kept giving. It was the one he’d seen a few times last week, when she’d given up on being the It Girl.

“You swear?” he confirmed.

She traced an X over her heart. “Cross my heart and hope to die.”

Arnold nodded and finally smiled at her. If anything, at this, she seemed to brighten a little. It was probably just a coincidence though. “So, how are we going to do this?”

“Well, first of all, your place or mine?” She grinned, eyes sparkling at some secret joke with herself. He didn’t get it, but he continued to smile anyhow. Honestly, he was just happy she was okay with the idea of coming over to his house.

“How about my house this afternoon? Then tomorrow we could go to yours. And then back to mine on Sunday.”

Helga nodded, face still lit up with a smile. “I’ll take it home with me tonight and tomorrow, and you can have the egg on Sunday night.”

“Sounds good.” He looked up as the bus came to a stop. “This is where I get off, let’s go Helga.”

She followed after him. One of her arms was swinging, but the arm that held the egg was held carefully against her chest. “Sure thing, Football Head.”

Arnold stopped and looked at her as they stepped off the bus. He was, once again, reminded that he really had intended to talk with her about the whole bullying thing. But, was he really okay with rocking the boat? After all, she seemed so pleasant right now, and it was just a nickname….even if she usually used it in a hurtful context.

He compromised with himself as the two of them began making their way towards the boarding house. “Hey, besides, well, the obvious, why do you call me Football Head?”

To his utter astonishment, Helga blushed. Then she seemed to fight back a grumpy look and turned away from his face as she spoke. She traced gentle circles on the surface of the egg. “It’s….it’s a--a bad habit, okay?”

Arnold raised a brow. “What?” he asked incredulously.

She huffed. “Look, I said I was going to try and be nice, not that I was going to spill my guts to you about every single minute detail of my life.”

And there was the angry defensiveness he’d been expecting since they got the egg. He regretted asking. “Sure, okay.”

They walked in silence for a moment that seemed to stretch for hours, until finally Helga groaned and stopped. “Okay look, the truth is….I have a habit of nicknaming people and not being able to un-nickname even if they’re my f--f--friends.” She gave a harsh laugh. “Took me a whole month to stop calling Phoebe ‘Glasses’ when we became friends in first grade, and I hadn’t said much more than ten words to her in the three years we’d been in the same class.”

There was a dawning of understanding in Arnold’s mind. “And since it’s been six years, it’s even harder for you to stop doing it now.”

She nodded, looking the slightest bit guilty. When she spoke next, it was a mumble. “And, hey….it’s not necessarily because I think you look weird or anything….” With that said, she sped up her walking.

Arnold tilted his head. “What do you mean by that?”

Helga giggled nervously. “Oh! Look! We’re here at your house!” She ran up the stoop. “Let’s start this egg project of ours.”

Arnold decided to put the moment behind them, to think on it later.

Once they were situated in the living room, Helga handed the egg off to Arnold. She pulled the assignment paper out of her bag and put it on the coffee table so they could both look at it. “So, Simmons wants us to have the egg with one of us 24/7, but it would be stupid to just have it in our hands the whole time. We should make a box for it.”

Arnold passed the egg back and forth between his hands. “Why?” he asked curiously.

He got a flat look in return. “Because parents can’t have their babies in their hands all the time either.”

“Oh, I guess that makes sense,” Arnold said brightly.

Helga opened her mouth to speak and then closed it again, hard. After a moment, she spoke. “Sorry, I was about to say something mean. Let’s go put together this box.”

He patted her back as they stood up. “The point is, you stopped before you did. I’m proud of you and I think you’re doing a pretty good job at being nice.”

She stiffened, her face pinking again, and her hand shot up to clutch at something at her neckline. “Thanks. Hey, um, is there a bathroom around here?”

At that moment the door to the hall bathroom opened and Grandpa came out, grinning. “Oh, I wouldn’t go in there if I were you.”

Helga slumped, her hand falling to hang limply at her side. “Nevermind,” she muttered.

Arnold was about to tell her about the bathroom upstairs, when Grandpa suddenly stopped and peered at Helga. “Hey, you’re that little girl, Arnold’s friend….uh….” He thought for a moment and then snapped his fingers. “Helga! That’s your name.”

Helga nodded silently, staring at him. She seemed to be nervously waiting for him to say something in particular. Then Grandpa winked at her and she relaxed. “Thanks for letting me come over, Mr….?” Again, she seemed to be wanting him to say something in particular.

Grandpa just grinned. “Just call me Grandpa.” He shot a flat look up the stairs. “Everyone else does.”

Helga slumped again. “Okay.”

Though somewhat confused by the odd exchange, Arnold moved the conversation along. “Hey Grandpa, do we have any old shoe boxes that we could use for our egg?”

“‘Course!” The elder looked at the egg in Arnold’s hands and then between the two of them. “Ah, the old egg project.” His grin got wider. “Which means the two’a you are its parents. Aww, isn’t that sweet.”

Arnold’s face got hot, and out of the corner of his eye he could see Helga’s face too. If her’s got any redder it would burst into flames. But she didn’t burst out with a rebuttal like he thought she would. She was probably too embarrassed to say anything. “Grandpa,” he groaned.

“Okay, okay, I’ll butt out.” He winked at Arnold. “Just remember what I told you last month.”

“What?”

Grandpa stared at him in disbelief, before smacking a hand to his head and walking off, muttering something that sounded like, “Denser than I ever was, that’s for sure. Poor girl….”

He didn’t get it. But he did still need that box, so he called out for his grandpa again.

“The boxes are in the hall closet,” the man called back.

Arnold turned back to Helga, laughing apologetically. “Sorry about my grandpa, he can get a little….” He searched for the correct word.

“Zany, yet lovable?” Helga said, beginning to smile again. Arnold smiled back at her, passing her the egg so he could go rifle through the hall closet.

Once they’d gotten a box, they put together a small nest of rags and fresh tissues and a handkerchief Arnold was almost certain was his grandma’s. Then they put the egg in its new bed and stepped back to look at it.

“Looks cosy,” Helga said, looking satisfied.

“Yep. What do we need to do now?” Arnold asked, almost eager to continue now. He was actually having a lot of fun with Helga as his partner. When she wasn’t being a pain, she was really kind of cool.

“Well, we do need to answer the Day 1 questions,” Helga said picking up the assignment paper and trading it with him for the box.

“What is your egg baby’s name and gender?” He looked at Helga. “What do you think?”

Helga smirked at the ground. “It’s the dude who decides it, bucko,” she murmured.

“Huh?”

“Ohh, nothing. How about a girl?” She ran a hand over the back of her head. “We could name her, oh, I don’t know, Elissa. Elissa Eleanor.”

“Okay, but why--” He wanted to know her reasoning behind the egg’s name. It was oddly specific. “Nevermind.”

“Yup, Elissa Eleanor….” She trailed off, looking at him meaningfully.

“What?”

“What’s the kid’s last name?” she snapped.

Arnold shrugged. “She could just take your last name: Elissa Eleanor Pataki.” He smiled. “Has a nice ring to it.”

She was beginning to look pink around the edges again, but she was scowling. “Believe me, Arnoldo, you don’t wanna brand our kid with the Pataki name--it marks you for life.”

It was clear from the way she spoke that it was not a positive. He wanted to ask her about her family, but from all the times he’d tried it the past, it didn’t tend to go well. He held his tongue. Instead, he looked back down at the paper, beginning to fill in the answer. “Okay, Elissa Eleanor Shortman it is.”

There was a squeak from Helga’s direction and Arnold stopped writing and looked up at her. “Something wrong?”

“Nope.” Her voice was high pitched and wavery but she waved him off. “Next question.”

He shrugged. Girls were weird. “What are some things that parents need to prepare for the arrival of a child? What are some things you and your partner have done?”

Helga sat back against the legs of the couch, deep in thought. Arnold did his best to think as well. He figured, once they’d both thought a bit, they could compare their thoughts and write down both.

Arnold sighed. He didn’t have the most typical of upbringings. But his parents had been around until he was almost two, so they had done the part of the raising he and Helga were having to simulate.

Helga was the first one to speak. “Love,” she said quietly, melancholic, her hand brushing the rim of the box and her eyes locked onto the egg. “A baby needs all the love and attention it can get.”

Arnold nodded, giving her an encouraging smile. “And you’ve barely taken your eyes off the egg since we got it.”

Helga grinned shyly. “Well, you did most of the putting together of the box.”

“So, a place to live and sleep for both questions,” Arnold agreed. “That also falls under keeping them safe. Kids need that too. Like, my parents moved back to Hillwood because we were living in the jungle and that wasn’t safe for me.”

Helga went wide eyed. “You weren’t born here?”

Arnold. “Not if what my Grandpa says is true.”

She stared at him for a long moment, looking struck by the discovery. Finally she shook her head. “You’re right though. Now, what’s the next question?”

Arnold shook his head. “That’s it for tonight. The other questions are for tomorrow and Sunday.”

“Kay then.” She shot a quick look towards the living room clock. “It’s getting pretty late, I’d better head home.” She got up, slinging her backpack on and gathering the box with their egg into her arms.

“Do you want to stay for dinner?” Arnold asked, before she could take more than a few steps towards the hall.

She turned, considering him. Then she shook her head, giving him a grim smile. “Nah. Thanks, but I’d better go make sure Miriam’s eaten something. See ya.”

Then she was gone.

A few minutes after she had gone, Arnold’s grandpa came into the living room and sat down beside him. He patted the boy on his back. “She gone home?”

“Yeah….” He looked up at Grandpa. “Girl’s are kind of complicated, huh Grandpa?”

Grandpa cackled. “More than you know, Shortman, more than you know.”

---

Arnold met up with Helga at noon the next day, outside her house.

“Aren’t we going in?” he asked, as Helga climbed down her stoop to stand beside him, egg box in hand.

She shook her head. “It’s a nice day today. Let’s take a walk, go to the park or something. That’s what real parents do, right?”

Arnold shrugged. “I guess.”

They shared a commiserating moment, and Arnold thought back to the past Thanksgiving, when they had both bonded over having abnormal family lives. But, while Arnold had grown closer to his boarding house family as a result of that excursion, it seemed as though Helga was back to the relationship she’d had with her family prior to it. He felt sadness settle like a stone in his stomach.

Doing his best to break his own suddenly dour mood, Arnold looped his arm through Helga’s, taking the egg box from her. “We can go hang out under my favorite tree, there’s always a good sunspot there.”

Helga, surprisingly enough, didn’t pull away from him. Arnold felt it best not to ruin the moment, so he didn’t point it out. It was a nice walk, with a few calm words spoken between them.

Once they arrived at the park, they decided to take the long way around to Arnold’s tree. It was, as Helga had said, a nice day. The sun beat warm on their backs, pleasant but not overbearing. There was bird song in the air and in faint distance, the merry tinkle of the ice cream truck.

So, of course, such a nice day couldn’t last.

“Hey, Arnold!”

Arnold and Helga’s eyes cut from where they had been looking at each other and towards the location of the voice.

Phoebe and Gerald were walking towards them, pushing something that looked almost like a baby carriage, if a lot smaller than the real thing. It was very pink. Arnold thought he might have recognized it from somewhere.

“Hi guys,” Arnold greeted, smiling at the two. They looked very cozy together.

“Baby carriage,” Helga said blankly, as though she was trying to wrap her mind around it.

Gerald scowled at her. “Yeah it’s my sister’s stroller. I see you’re making Arnold do all the work here.”

“Oh, no Gerald, I--” Arnold tried to interject, to correct the misunderstanding. It would be such a disaster if, after almost two days, all he and Helga’s pleasant lack of animosity went out the window.

Surprisingly (Helga was surprising him a lot lately), she kept her temper. “It’s cool Arnoldo, I know how it looks.” She grinned at the other couple (of kids. Not couple as in dating, because otherwise it would imply that Helga and Arnold were a couple and--). “I was just thinking, that stroller’s a pretty smart idea. It would’ve saved our tired arms from having to switch who’s holding the box.” She grinned at Phoebe. “What’s the kiddo’s name?”

Phoebe beamed at her friend. “His name is George,” she said brightly.

Helga’s smile got wider. “Oh, cool, after your Granddad right?”

The smaller girl nodded emphatically. They seemed to silently communicate (and once again, girls were so very odd and Arnold didn’t understand them at all).

“Hey, Pataki, I’m sorry for accusing you,” Gerald muttered after watching the two for a moment.

Helga waved him off. “It’s fine Geraldo. I’ll tell you what I told Arnold. For the duration of this project, I am being nice. It’s a get out of jail free card or whatever.” She smirked. “And, hey, our kids would probably end up best friends, so we might as well do a truce.” She fluttered her eyes in jest. “For the sake of the children~!”

Arnold laughed cheerfully. “Hey, you guys wanna come with us? We were going to go sit under the tree with the good sunspot.”

Gerald rolled his eyes but gave him a fond look. “Nah, we’re gonna go back to Phoebe’s house. We were gonna finish up our math and English homework.”

Helga raised her brow and turned to stare down Phoebe, who seemed a little pink. Politely, Arnold decided not to say anything. “Okay, have a good time. See you on Monday.”

As soon as they were out of earshot of the other two, Helga burst into giggles. “Phoebe always does her homework a week ahead, she’s just using that as an excuse.”

Arnold blinked and then turned to look behind them, considering. “Oh. Does she like-like Gerald?”

Helga scowled. “Don’t use that phrase, please. I can only be so nice. And don’t tell her I told you. She never actually said anything, but we kind of have a mutual understanding when it comes to crushes. Like me, with--” She cut herself off, putting her face in her hand. “Pretend I stopped talking, like, two sentences ago.”

“Whatever you say Helga.”

Huh.

So, Helga had (or at one time had) a crush.

He didn’t know why that bothered him so much. It wasn’t that he couldn’t see her like-liking someone. He just--

“Sound like she likes ya Arnold--she’s always picking on you in particular--”

He shook his head roughly. No way. No chance. Not possible.

“Something wrong, Arnold?”

Helga’s voice was soft with worry. He gave her a meek smile. “Nah, I’m fine. Look, there’s the tree.”

The two of them sat beneath it, placing the egg box between them. Helga leaned back against the bark, crossing her legs. Arnold mimicked her.

“So, how do you think everyone else is doing?” Arnold asked, doing his best to keep his mind off the thoughts he’d just been having.

Helga shrugged. “Well, for starters, I wouldn’t be surprised if Harold’s eaten his and Rhonda’s egg.”

“Helga!” His tone was disapproving.

She grinned unapologetically. “I bet you a dollar.”

Arnold was silent.

“You don’t want to take the bet do you?” she snorted. “‘Cuz you know it’s a chump’s bet.”

“Two dollars,” he said finally. “And you have to keep up our truce for another whole week if I win.”

She crossed her arms, her face pleased as punch. “And when Harold does eat their project?”

“I’ll do something you want me to do--within reason,” he added, when she turned to give him an ecstatic (and, frankly, evil) smile.

“Deal.”

They sat under the tree for at least another hour. The time was a pleasant thing to spend. He liked having conversations with Helga that didn’t involve her threatening to punch his face in.

Her house was silent when they arrived there. Helga didn’t look the least bit surprised by this. “Miriam’s probably asleep on the couch, but don’t worry about being quiet, she could sleep through Armageddon.”

He glanced warily at the living room, but followed her readily into the kitchen.

“You want lunch? I made three cheese chilli mac last night for supper and we have leftovers.”

“I don’t want to intrude--”

“Dude, it’s just chilli mac, I’m not breaking open a bottle of 200 year old wi--uh, sparkling cider.” She handed off the egg box, opened up the fridge and pulled out a tupperware. “Plus, it’s past lunch, I’m hungry, and you’ve gotten to me enough that I’ll feel guilty for eating in front of you.”

Arnold smiled. “In that case, I’d love some.”

She heated the pasta up and they sat down. The egg box sat between them in a chair. She served the food between the two of them, giving Arnold the bigger portion.

“Helga, you don’t have to do that!”

She shrugged. “You’re the guest, you’re my pretend husband, and I’m not actually all that fond of mac and cheese.” Her mouth quirked. “Between you and me (meaning don’t tell anyone or I might actually punch you), I’m kind of lactose intolerant.”

He was trying not to blush at the pretend husband comment--he was probably failing. There was more important things to focus on though. “But you drink milk all the time!”

“And then my stomach feels like I have giant pop rocks in it, that’s just the way it works.” She stabbed her fork into a noodle nonchalantly. “Helga the bully can’t be lactose intolerant. Nerds are lactose intolerant.”

He gave her a flat, unimpressed look. “I think I remember having a similar sort of conversation like this with Rhonda.”

Helga snorted. “Oh, I’m a geek, I embrace that fully. But nerds are the ones that have to be scared for themselves and I can’t afford to be scared, I’m already--” She cut herself off, stabbing several more noodles and shoving them into her mouth. “Eat your food Arnold. We aren’t teaching our child to waste.”

Heat went up Arnold’s neck, over his ears and cheeks, and settling somewhere around his forehead. He was starting to think that she reveled in his blushing. And he didn’t know what was worse--the normal kind of teasing, which kind of hurt sometimes, or this new kind of flirty teasing (because that’s all it was. She couldn’t like him. And pretending wasn’t nice).

“You’re hilarious Helga,” he said, deadpanned. And he decided to return serve--see if she liked it. “If she gets your sense of humor from you, I’m going to pity poor George--since he’s probably going to be front and center for all her jokes.”

And, like he had hoped, she did blush. “Just shut up and eat.”

“Whatever you say Helga.” Feeling just a tiny bit smug, Arnold finally took a bite. His eyes went wide and he stared at Helga.

“What? What’s wrong?”

“Helga...this is good. Did you make it from scratch?”

Her blush from moments before came back with a vengeance. “Yeah. Have to feed myself somehow.”

He tried to ignore the sad context and instead beamed at her. “Well, now we know that Elissa will be well fed too.”

Okay, so maybe he was getting a bit into the whole pretend baby, pretend couple thing too. He couldn’t help it. This version of Helga--so rarely seen, was so interesting and he liked her. And it was nice to see her blush.

After they finished eating, Arnold followed Helga up to her room.

“So, today’s questions,” Helga prompted. “I looked at them, and I thought, maybe we could do separate answers for them.”

“What, why?”

She crossed her arms defensively, leaning against her closet door. “Because. I have lots I wanna say and I don’t want you crowding in on my space.” She gave him a look that might as well have said, ‘You wanna make something of it, buddy?’

Arnold sighed. “Whatever you say Helga…”

Later, as he settled on Helga’s floor to write out his answers, he chanced a look at Helga, who was staring intensely at her own paper. She was frowning, brow furrowed, and her shoulders were tensed. Whatever she was writing, it was clearly bothering her to do so.

Arnold looked down at his own paper. After 24 hours, how do you feel about having responsibility for the egg baby?

How did he feel?

He….he liked it. He and Helga had, well, they had bonded over their hypothetical child. It had given him an insight into her that he never would have gotten if he hadn’t allowed her the chance to be the good person he always knew she was. And he wouldn't have realized…..

Helga would make a good mom, one day….

He wrote the thoughts down, something like happiness beginning to bubble in his stomach. After he had written a sufficiently sized paragraph, he looked at the other two questions on the list. One of them was for the next day so he focused on the other.

After two days, how do you feel about your responsibility? Each partner should answer this question by themselves.

Arnold began to jot down his thoughts as Helga suddenly rose to her feet. She waved off his concerned look. “I’ll be back. Don’t go in my closet or I’ll end the truce faster than you can blink.”

“I won’t look in your closet,” he promised her.

He watched her leave, then looked towards where she’d left her homework folder sitting open on her bed.

He wondered what she’d been writing about, to give her such a grave face. Did she think things were going terribly? Did she regret their being paired up, what with him asking so many questions?

….he wanted to know.

Arnold eyed the opened door, silently getting to his feet. He tiptoed over to the bed and looked down. There were a few loose slips of paper out of the folder’s sleeve. He picked them up.

The first paper didn’t even look like their assignment. Had she given up on writing it? Or was she already finished? He gave a quick glance at the other paper, which did indeed look filled in.

That was the paper he wanted to look at, of course, but this first paper…

Arnold was so curious. He couldn’t help himself. Almost against his will, his eyes began taking in the words.

Helga G. Pataki Mr. Simmon’s Class Creative Writing Assignment

Your Music By anonymous

I see music behind my eyelids when you’re around Though there is nothing and no one that’s making the sound Your laughter might the be tinkling of piano keys Like the kind I play when there’s nobody around who sees Your smile is even more beautiful than your laughter The zip of a bow down a viola, like the kind composers would be after

The music I see in my eyes is your soul, I know it The beauty is beyond what I found elsewhere, nothing else can ever fit. Sometimes when I dream at night, I hear the music aloud And I watch an orchestra play your song, watched by the very biggest crowd If the world could see what I see when I look at you, my dearest Then they too would hold you to their heart the nearest.

The music changes sometimes, Jazz or Opera or Country But though the tune rearranges itself, it’s still the same beautiful melody I would sing its harmony if I were braver than I can be I’d show the world your wonder and your soul, bright where everyone can see The music that I see, the one that comes from you, is as familiar as my own heart For my own soul has shared that song, since the very first start.

Well, if he wanted confirmation that Helga had a crush on someone, here it was, in her loopy, purple cursive. Not to mention, her hereto now unknown talent in writing.

And, once again, his feelings were mixed on the whole.

He was happy that Helga had found something she was good at, and seemed to like as well. But there was a strange feeling in his stomach and he didn’t like it--he’d felt it before, but he couldn’t remember where. He’d felt something near to it on the bus yesterday, but, looking back, that feeling was much more….positive.

He wasn’t….he couldn’t be jealous….right? Because that was just, crazy. He didn’t like-like Helga.

He didn’t. Really.

Arnold roughly shook his head and switched the papers. If he took too long, Helga was going to come back before he had time to look at the reason he was doing something like snooping in the first place.

His eyes quickly skimmed over the answers he and Helga had done together, locking on the last two that were filled out, with blocks of purple words.

After 24 hours, how do you feel about having responsibility for this egg baby?

This assignment scared made me a little nervous at first, because eggs are pretty breakable and small--which I guess was the point in the first place, since babies are too. But, your sentimental rants about teamwork must have gotten to me, because for once, I’ve been feeling pretty optimistic about this whole thing. I guess it was made a lot easier because of my partner--he’s Mr. Responsible, which means he’s the ideal parent.

Arnold stopped, feeling his face warm, a smile playing at his lips. So, he wasn’t the only one who thought their partner would make a good parent. That was nice to know.

After two days, how do you feel about your responsibility? Each partner should answer this question by themselves.

I’m going to be honest. I’ll hate myself for it, but I figure this falls under that ‘niceness’ pact that me and Arnold made.

I was, and am still, terrified out of my mind. For several reasons, all of which you already know (my writing isn’t that vague when you know my name). I might as well talk them out though. …

I don’t want to be my parents. Neither one of them have been the best example as to what a parent is supposed to do. I’ve mostly been guessing…I thought about how I would want to treat my own family, one I’d created on my own, and I just couldn’t stomach being inattentive or mean. Not for this. I think (again, being optimistic here) I’ve been doing a pretty good at keeping my meaner parts under wraps. Hopefully.

I shouldn’t have to really expand on the other reason I’m so scared. I’ve turned in enough poems that you should be more than well aware by now. (And speaking of, if I find out you somehow managed to mastermind this pair, I’m….going to be very unhappy with you). But here, since I’m not spending paragraphs waxing poetic about my partner, have an extra poem. (no reading this one out loud).

Playing House

It’s truly a dream come true for me. But for you, my dearest, it must be a horror. To be My pretend husband and to ‘Play house’ as it were, pretend it’s true, And care for any child of yours and mine.

I know it’s pretend, I know it’s not real But when you smile at me, the way I feel…. Is true as day is day, that feeling in my heart That ‘I love you’, that I’ve felt from our start, So playing house is, for me, just fine.

I’m trying to be sorry for being so happy about this That, for just a bit, I can pretend it is me and our child you could miss I want to be sorry for dreaming of a trio’s walk through a park, For wishing that my love for you could ever make a single mark Enough that, that love could create something like a child so sublime.

I’m not sorry though, as you’ve probably guessed This feeling, that these few days have been my best I can’t stop it, this elation, this overwhelming joy What I wish I could stop, was my ability to jeer and annoy For the one who has left a football shape inside my heart for all time. 

There was movement on the stairs. Arnold quickly thrust the papers back in their proper place and sat back down beside his own stuff. Just as he’d settled, Helga rounded her way into her room. He hoped his face didn’t look as warm as it felt.

She crossed her arms and raised her brow at him. “What did I miss?”

He would have to process this discovery when he alone. He would wait to confront her until he had an answer. Until then….

Arnold gave Helga a smile. “Nothing much.”

And that was the last excitement to be had until the next night--Sunday night.

Arnold had convinced Helga to stay for dinner, and so she was at his house when it happened. The one thing neither of them would have expected to happen. The egg began to hatch.

“U-um, Arnold, something is going on,” Helga said, panic in her voice and peering into the egg box on her lap.

The boy raced into the living room, hands still soapy from doing the dinner dishes. “What’s wrong?”

She beckoned him with a frantic hand. “I--I think the egg is hatching!”

Indeed, hairline cracks were beginning to appear all around the exterior of the egg. It shook and shook, until finally, a teeny orange beak began poking its’ way out. After several long moments, the baby chick’s head popped out. Arnold and Helga’s intake of breath was simultaneous.

It was a wonder, watching the little yellow thing do it’s best to rid itself of the egg shell.

Somewhere, in the back of his mind, Arnold felt a pang of loss for the egg itself, but it was much buried under the sudden joy.

The baby chick gave a little peep and Helga made a noise that almost sounded like a coo. He watched her from the corner of his eye as she smiled, and Arnold thought he might have saw the slightest glimmer of a happy tear. Suddenly though, fear flashed over her face and her head whipped around to look at Arnold.

“Arnold, we don’t know how to care for a baby chick!” Helga hissed, terror developing in her tone.

Anxiety curled like a sudden grease fire in Arnold’s stomach, but he forced himself to stay calm. He knew from past experience that if he freaked out, then Helga was bound to be twice as terrified. They both need to remain levelheaded.

He swallowed and spoke. “Okay, I have a pigeon coop on the roof. We’ve hatched the baby birds before, so I have a incubation sort of thing called a brooder in the basement. Grandpa can help us set it up. Um…” He tried to think. It was likely that pigeon care and chicken care were different…”What time does the library close? Seven, right?”

Helga nodded unsurely. “I think so.”

“I’ll go check out some books. In the meantime I’ll get grandma to heat a hot water bottle while the incubator warms up.” Helga still looked scared, so Arnold smiled warmly at her and put a comforting hand on her shoulder. “Elissa will be okay Helga. Promise.”

It was a reckless promise to be had, but one Arnold felt hopeful that he could follow through on.

And so the night went on. Grandpa set up the incubator while Arnold raced the five blocks to the library. Arnold found six books on the subject of chick raising, and checked out all of them. Then he ran back to the boarding house, arms laden with the heavy books.

Within a half hour, the baby chick was safely behind the warm confines of the incubator, shuffling around on the torn up paper towels within it, pecking at the feed scattered around, and softly peeping.

The two students slumped tiredly in front of the incubator, watching the little yellow puff ball.

“How can something that tiny, be so exhausting?” Helga wondered, before she yawned widely and slumped even further down.

“I think it’s a baby thing,” Arnold guessed, catching the yawn and feeling his jaw crack a little. “I’m just glad that it’s been so hot lately. Any cooler and it would’ve been dangerous.”

Helga nodded emphatically and then blinked tiredly. She moved slowly to lean against him. He let her, watching as her head flopped against his shoulder and her eyes drooping in half-sleep. He allowed her to lay there, liking the comfortable weight on him.

She was asleep by the time Grandpa came to check on them. The elder grinned at the sight they made. He gave Arnold a thumb’s up. The boy rolled his eyes fondly.

“She fell asleep, that’s all,” he said quietly, careful not to wake the girl. “It’s been a bit of a long night.”

Grandpa gave a soft chuckle. “Oh, I know, Shortman. It’s just, it took me almost twenty years before Gertie fell asleep on my shoulder like that. Heck, we didn’t start dating til we was in our thirties.”

Arnold blinked. And then blinked again. “Wait, you and Grandma started dating when you guys were in your thirties--you’re not saying that your childhood bully is--”

“My Pookie,” Grandpa said brightly, slightly too loudly.

“Grandpa,” Arnold hissed in warning, as Helga shifted slightly. After a moment, she settled, humming contentedly in her sleep. He glared at his grandpa. “You told me that when I can’t be loud. Grandpa, that’s not fair.”

Grandpa snickered. “Oh, well, I thought maybe you might’a finally figured it out--you’ve been staring at her all night like she’s a mystery you wanna explore.”

Arnold blushed. “I--I wasn’t staring….I just….” He turned to look at Helga, her face relaxed into a content smile. He wondered if she was dreaming something nice. He hoped so. She deserved nice dreams. There was a small cough and Arnold looked back up at his Grandpa, his face growing hotter. Grandpa made a gesture as if to say, ‘you were saying?’ Arnold sighed, smiling. “I guess….maybe, if we did end up like you and Grandma, it wouldn’t be too bad. She’d make a good mom, I think….” He was back to looking at the sleeping girl fondly.

“You’re growing up, Shortman,” his Grandpa said. “I’ll be by to check on you and your little chicky later. Oh, and the baby chicken too.” He snickered at Arnold’s flat look and walked into the hall, beginning to climb the stairs. Arnold could just hear the man speak to himself. “Pookie owes me five bucks. She thought the girl’d have to confess before he figured it out.” He cackled again and was gone.

The night went by fast.

At five in the morning, Arnold awoke to the sound of panic. He couldn’t find it within himself to move just yet though. His eyes stayed closed, even as he listened.

“Why am I still in his house?” Arnold heard Helga hiss to herself. She sounded rather scared. There was a breath, as though she were trying to calm down. “Elissa. I’m here because Elissa hatched. That’s all.” She sounded like she was trying to convince herself of that, rather than stating a simple fact.

With what Arnold had found out on Saturday, he thought it kind of made sense, the way she was reacting. If he had a crush--on her, as an example (just as an example)--then he had to admit, he would probably be feeling similar.

Suddenly, she shook his shoulder, hissing out his name. Arnold opened his eyes and sat up. “Helga? What’s wrong? Elissa okay?”

The frantic look Helga had had on her face immediately softened. “Yes, she’s fine.” The frenetic look immediately returned. “But I’m toast. School’s in a couple hours. I don’t have a change of clothes, or my backpack, or--”

Arnold put a hand on her shoulder and she closed her mouth. “Don’t worry, Grandpa can drive us over to your house on the way to school.”

“Don’t go out of your way for--”

“--we were gonna drive anyway, so I could bring the brooder to school. Elissa shouldn’t be out of it yet.”

Helga’s face cleared into understanding and she sat back, finally calm.

Arnold had a thought though, and frowned. “Will your parents be angry that you stayed at a friend’s house without asking?”

Helga barked out a laugh. “I doubt they even noticed.”

“But, on Thanksgiving….”

She shook her head, giving him a sad smile at his concern. “Olga was probably the one who kick started their worry. They don’t tend to notice much otherwise.” She didn’t sound mad about it, just sort of tired.

Arnold was a little mad about it though. How could they not notice their interesting and funny younger daughter? “Helga…”

Helga shook her head. “Don’t worry about Arnold. Let’s just make sure we got everything together.”

Later, as Grandpa parked the packard outside of Helga’s brownstone, her hypothesis about her parents proved correct. She was in and out of the house within fifteen minutes with nary a shout from inside--nor did she look angry when she came outside again.

Arnold secretly wished she had gotten in trouble, if only so it would prove that she had been noticed by her parents.

The drive to school was silent, but not uncomfortably so. Helga seemed to be looking over the egg-baby paper, adding in a few lines, a small smile playing on her lips. Arnold himself had looked over his own paper earlier, adding in his thoughts on the most recent developments--about Elissa and his thoughts on Helga alike.

He was rather glad, now, that Helga had requested they have separate papers. Some of his thoughts could possibly earn him an encounter with Ol’ Betsy or the Five Avengers. Or at least a warning of them.

Mr. Simmons was utterly ecstatic when they met with him before class. The room was empty--most of its students were still on the bus ride to school, while the rest played outside. So it was just the teacher and the two of them.

And Elissa, of course.

“Oh, it’s so cute,” the man cooed, observing the little chick, which was currently investigating the large marbles in the water bowl. “My goodness children, you put your hearts into this. I couldn’t be prouder!”

“Ah, Mr. Simmons?” Arnold asked. “How did we end up with a egg that would hatch?”

Helga gave the man a suspicious look. “Did you set this up?” There was a note of accusation in her voice.

Simmons shook his head, eyes wide. “Oh, no. I wouldn’t put an animal’s life at risk like that, on the chance that the two of you had lost the egg, or been unable to get it under heat in time.”

Helga let out a breath, probably of relief.

“So, um, what’s going to happen to Elissa?” Arnold found himself inquiring. Simmons gave him a questioning look. “Um, our chick. Is there a farm that can raise her?”

Helga made a soft, sad noise. Arnold glanced at her, but her face was blank. He continued speaking.

“Or would I be allowed to keep her at the boarding house?” Simmons’ eyebrows raised in shock, so Arnold explained. “We already care for a variety of animals, including a flock of pigeons. If I make sure to read up on the subject, would I be able to keep her?”

Simmons hummed. “I don’t see why not….You are one of the most responsible of all of my students.”

Helga looked at Arnold, eyes wide. “You….You would keep her? Even though, from what we read last night, it’s kind of a lot of work?”

Arnold gave her a half-lidded smile. “I can’t give up our Elissa, Helga. She’s ours.”

Helga went pink, her face flickering between pleased and just shocked.

Simmons made a happy noise and the two of them turned to look at him. He was beaming. “The two of you really took this project seriously. Do you think you learned a lot?”

Arnold nodded, smiling widely. “I really had a lot of fun and I learned plenty of good things. It was a great project, right Helga?”

Before she could answer, though, students began shuffling in the door. As he came in, Gerald went wide eyed at the sight of the brooder, and, likely, at the dark circles under Arnold and Helga’s eyes from staying up half the night. Phoebe had a similar concerned look, but the rest of their classmates seemed too caught up in themselves to notice what was going on at the front of the classroom.

Arnold turned back to see Helga was staring at him. Her mouth was opening and closing and she had a look of consternation on her face. She seemed to be trying to decide how to answer Arnold’s question. She kept glancing at the rest of the students, brow furrowed. It was clear from the look on her face that she was debating between being mean to keep her reputation safe and being nice and keeping the quiet peace the two of them had going. Finally she sighed and spoke.

“Yeah, it wasn’t half bad.” Her voice came out quiet, and, thus, no one seemed to even hear her. She breathed a sigh of relief.

The bell rang then and the duo began making their way to their desks, Arnold carrying the brooding box.

As they sat down, Helga smirked and spoke out of the side of her mouth at him. “By the way, you totally owe me two bucks and a favor. Harold clearly chowed down on his and Rhonda’s egg.”

Arnold couldn’t help but laugh.

[artlessictoan]

Also, Smoke Into The Sand w/ 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15! OoO As a side-note I haven't read this yet (SHAME ON ME BC I WANNA) and i'm SUPER interested in it!

asdfjskdjskdjfsk this is gonna get long fukc

What inspired you to write the fic this way?

my main goal with sits was to make it read like an old myth or storybook, an old tale that would be passed down for generations, the majority of the fic is written in that style exactly, but the overall story definitely is (and it does come through a bit more in how the backstory is told and some of the more important scenes)

that said, the main narrative is written much more slice-of-life-y, one of my biggest inspirations for this fic is the manga monogatari (bride’s story), it’s a really nice series that explores the daily life of people in various areas along the silk road, it has that simple, everyday life feel that i love and really wanted to write into sits! that’s where the random details about desert living and the tribe’s lifestyle come in (warning for anyone who might want to check out mono though: it does have an arranged marriage between a 20 yr old woman and a 12 yr old boy, it’s being played as a more platonic/familial relationship thus far but i can totally understand why it would put people off, so just a heads-up before anyone jumps in)

What scene did you first put down?

the first scene i actually started writing was the very first scene! but the very first scene, the one that spawned this entire fic i haven’t actually gotten to yet, it’s gonna be v near the end and i’m dying to finally reveal it because it’s gonna be Big.. but i shalln’t spoil it here, just something for my readers to look forwards to

What’s your favorite line of narration?

ok so like i said i’m shit at remembering any of what i write and it’s a bit more than just a line but fuck it:

Gaara froze, in fact, everything did. The soft whistling ofthe wind cut off into eerie silence, the constantly shifting sand stopped witha suddenness that was entirely unnatural, Naruto glanced away for a second andsaw that some grains were being held in the air, perfectly still. He turned hisgaze back to the spirit before him, his expression hadn’t changed at all, hewas still glaring, but his eyes were unfocussed, like they weren’t reallylooking at him.

Naruto was too scared to move, to speak; hecould only stare and pray that he hadn’t just sealed his own death warrant.

What’s your favorite line of dialogue?

again, not a line, but i really love this exchange between nart and ameno so effing much:

“So mature… You’re growing up too fast, how am I ever goingto keep up?” she asked, mostly to herself judging from the distant look on herface.

He slowly drew his hand back once her face wasdry and gave her a confused look. “You won’t have to; I’ll just carry you withme.

What part was hardest to write?

well i might just be saying this cause it’s the most recent struggle i faced (among many) but the chapter six reALLY killed me. trying to find the right way to describe the exhaustion and constant fear took many, many weeks and i’m still not sure i really nailed it (hopefully something i’ll be able to fix in the next chap)

What makes this fic special or different from all your other fics?

other than being the first multi-chap fic i’ve ever written, this is actually one of my oldest fic ideas ever, seriously it’s been kicking around in my head for a good five years or so now so there’s that

it also happens to contain basically All of my Special Interests; naruto, deserts, nomadic culture, boring minutia, swords.... honestly the only thing it’s missing is cats (though i’m sure i can find some way to work them in too..)

and, honestly, this is kinda my magnum opus? or at least that’s how i’ve always thought of it, i had actually planned to not start writing it until i’d already done a few other fics because i wanted to make sure my writing skill was at its best before starting such an ambitious fic.. yeah that didn’t happen, but i think that’s actually worked out alright, jumping in with a harder fic right at the start of my writing ‘career’ has been a bit of a crash-course and taught me a heck of a lot, i still think it’s gonna be one of the best things i ever write though. it just has a very special place in my heart

Where did the title come from?

well tbh i’m kinda shit at titles, so i usually just hunt through the first chap looking for any particularly poetic-sounding line that would work (though in this case it does have a nice little easter egg, since in arab folklore jinn are made of smoke!)

Did any real people or events inspire any part of it?

hmm not really? the whole thing is meant to be very fantastical and unreal (despite all the slice-of-life stuff), the only real-world insp comes from my research into bedouin lifestyle and such

What do you like best about this fic?

gaara! i mean ofc i like him in anything but this version of gaa - silent, detached, barely human, incredibly complex - is one of my faves and he’s really fun to write, we’ll be finding out more about him as the fic goes on and when we do it’ll make his actions before now both more understandable and less at the same time (he’s quite the paradox)

What do you like least about this fic?

the inconsistency. i feel like i must’ve gone through about ten different writing styles throughout the course of it and it bothers me that i haven’t quite got that storybook feel i was always aiming for, i’ll probably do a rewrite when i’ve got more experience under my belt and try to make the whole thing a bit more cohesive

What music did you listen to, if any, to get in the mood for writing this story? Or if you didn’t listen to anything, what do you think readers should listen to to accompany us while reading?

as with btc, i mostly listen to soundtracks, since songs with lyrics really distract me when writing, since i like to try and match the music i listen to to the setting/tone of what i’m writing i try to listen to classical middle-eastern music (though i’ve had a hard time finding many albums of just instrumental stuff, if anyone has any recs i’d love you forever!)

in addition to that there’s the soundtracks of Journey, Bastion, Dreamfall Chapters and the Prince of Persia games and for instrumental artists i really like Break of Reality and Tina Guo for sits insp!

Is there anything you wanted readers to learn from reading this fic?What did you learn from writing this fic?

hmm, well i’d love it if people learned a bit more about the cultures i’m writing about (and i’d like to learn more of that too tbh, i’m still finding out new things that i actually got wrong earlier on in the fic), maybe even get interested enough to go looking for more info themselves, because there’s a lot of stuff that i simply won’t be able to go into much detail about

as for myself, well ^that and also it’s just been a rEALLY good experience in so many small ways - writing longer fics, writing in general, character interaction, introspection, action, plotting, description, suspense, mystery..... i could go on but yeah, basically it’s helped me grow as an author in Every Single Way and i’m sure it’ll help ever more before it’s done!