#i said it already but it was a really really fun fic to read! and did i possibly go overboard for a doodle? mayhaps

[todayisafridaynight]

One of my fave jackets is this green jacket with a fur hood im wearin rn because 1.) its green 2.) my dad gave it to me 3.) it reminds me of saejima. Who also reminds me of my dad

[marchsage]

i absolutely had to draw something for this really sweet fic bri wrote about silver experiencing his first festival!!

he tried bobbing for apples <:3

[heymrspatel]

I’m really disappointed, I thought you were going to participate in Kinktober. Kind of let down not going to lie.

......well shit, i'm sorry?

[stiltonbasket]

For the fanfic tropes... Cop falls in love with criminal or the hanahaki disease

D. Not my favorite. I avoid it if I can, but it won’t necessarily put me off reading something.

[fleetsonourgecentral]

Hello hello! I hope everything has been going well for you. I had a prompt idea pop into my head, and rushed to type this out before i forgot lol. Anyway, I was wondering if you could write Sonic having a nightmare and/or suffering from the aftermath of one and Scourge helps him through it? Or the other way around, if that speaks more to your muse. I just really want to see these two learn to be more vulnerable around each other, and there is little doubt in my mind that these two have issues and really need a hug. Have a good week!

Omg how did you know I love writing about characters having nightmares... how did you know...

~~~

One of the downsides of travelling with someone was the lack of privacy options during the night. Sonic had grown to tolerate travelling with other people - although the slower speed always got on his nerves, no matter how necessary it was - but he'd never liked sharing his sleeping space with them. On bad days he was quick to awake at some of the most minor sounds, and being stuck with several other people shifting and mumbling in their sleep or getting up in the middle of the night for some water was a terrible thing to combine with that.

And on worse days, well. Even the thought of waking someone up because his stupid brain gave him a bad dream made his skin crawl.

It wasn't that he thought sleeping around someone was a show of vulnerability. Having a nightmare in front of someone, though? That was a completely different story.

Thankfully, nightmares weren't common for him, and the rest of the Freedom Fighters knew to keep their mouths shut and not bring it up if they ever caught him having one. It was the least he was owed after saving the world's ass time and time again. Occasionally Amy or Tails tried to make him, eurgh, open up about them, but for the most part he was left alone, and they were never brought up while travelling.

Still, despite learning to tolerate travelling with other people, he couldn't help but mentally cheer whenever he could do so alone at his own pace. So getting a new mission that required speed and small numbers, and thus no group of slower friends holding him back? A blessing he was long overdue.

Well, sort of. He wasn't travelling alone, but it was Scourge who was tagging along, and the good thing about travelling with Scourge was the slower speed thing was no longer a problem.

The bad thing was he had no idea if Scourge would keep his mouth shut on the off chance of a nightmare arising.

So when they settled down for the night, was it really any wonder Sonic volunteered to take watch?

With a sigh Sonic rolled his neck for the third time that night. Just because he'd chosen to take watch didn't mean he liked it. Honestly, he was tempted to lie back and get some rest. Not sleep, he'd be just awake enough to spring into action if anything happened, as unlikely as that was, but just doze a little to rest his eyes and energy.

Maybe it was dumb to offer to take watch in the first place. They'd chosen a spot secluded enough that they wouldn't be easily spotted by any of Robotnik's troops, and fear for their safety wasn't even really a concern in the first place when he'd pitched the idea, although he'd tried to make it seem like it was, and brushed off Scourge's call of "bullshit" with a comment about being the more experienced Freedom Fighter, and thus the one more equipped to decide what was and wasn't safe, so shut the fuck up.

Scourge had rolled his eyes but reluctantly backed down, muttering about being too tired to deal with his "paranoid bullshit." The fucking hypocrisy.

No, safety wasn't his concern at all. His concern was that stupid, stupid nagging voice in the back of his mind hissing "but what if tonight's a bad night?" over and over, even though there was no fucking reason to believe it would be other than having gone several months without one.

It wasn't that he didn't trust Scourge. He did, against his better judgement. Somehow the fungus fucker had gradually kicked in the hesitations he had about lookalikes and became a trustworthy ally on the battlefield and a surprisingly hilarious friend. He was cunning and a jackass who didn't whinge about Sonic's attitude (usually) and a fierce fighter who didn't give a shit about the "morals" of fighting dirty, an attitude the Freedom Fighters desperately needed. "Clean" fighting was a nice sentiment, but just not practical in a lot of situations, and Sonic couldn't say he cared too much about Scourge's dirty tactics. Rather their side than the enemy's, after all.

Against all odds and previous bad experiences with lookalikes, Sonic trusted Scourge with his life.

With his nightmares, though? That wasn't something he was ready to expose to him yet. Not even out of fear he'd be seen as weaker or less capable for them, or out of worry they'd be used against him somehow, which was the reason he kept them hidden from everyone except close friends. It was just... a lot.

Better to just not sleep in front of him and avoid the risk entirely.

Ugh, now he remembered why he never bothered with this "taking watch" shit. He was always more likely to overthink about dumb shit if he had the whole night to himself doing nothing but sitting and watching without something or someone to keep him entertained and distracted.

Cracking his neck, Sonic settled back against the rock he was leaning against. It was a quiet night, no midnight adventurers or obnoxiously loud birds or bugs, not even any wind ruffling the leaves on the trees. Peaceful, just like the nights he remembered from when he was younger, before Robotnik came to be. If he closed his eyes he could almost pretend he was back to those days, lounging on his back and stargazing on the roof of Kintobor's old laboratory.

One day. One day they'd beat Robotnik for good and he'd be able to have as many peaceful nights as he wanted; not every night, that would be way too boring, but some nights. Depending on how much action he wanted. Any fights he got involved in would be on his terms, not tethered to stopping every scheme he stumbled across regardless of if he was in the mood for fighting or not.

His eyes fell on Scourge, who was sleeping a couple of metres away, lying on his stomach with his face buried in his elbow.

He hoped Scourge would stick around to see those nights, too. He'd probably get bored of them, even quicker than Sonic would, but that was fine. He would provide good company for the nights Sonic didn't want to sit around and spend the night in peace. He was always up for finding something fun to do no matter the time of day, something his other friends just weren't down for, and it would be fun to run around looking for ass to kick together without having to worry about a threat as huge as Robotnik looming over them.

With his eyes on Scourge it was impossible to miss the stuttered hitch in breath even if he wanted to.

There was no threat, nothing to be worked up over, a simple shift in someone else's breathing pattern was all that had changed, but somehow Sonic found himself on full alert anyway. He sat up, staring intently at Scourge, cataloguing every little twitch just in case something was wrong. Scourge's breathing grew heavy, his face screwed up, his hands balled into fists as he made a pitiful attempt to curl in on himself. A shuddering inhale, a flinch accompanied by a... not a whine, or a whimper, but some kind of noise that was definitely unpleasant-

Oh.

He hadn't considered the possibility of Scourge having a nightmare.

Sonic was torn between watching in case the nightmare escalated and made Scourge hurt himself or looking away in some kind of attempt to respect Scourge's privacy. He'd never been on this end of the situation before and he had no clue what to do. Should he wake him up? Leave him be? Stay sat down and pretend he hadn't noticed anything, or leave and come back when Scourge woke up, pretending he had something to deal with and conveniently missed the whole thing?

Fuck, he wasn't good at shit like this. That was what the rest of the Freedom Fighters were for. He didn't even know if he hated or was grateful for being woken up from his own damn nightmares, how was he supposed to know what Scourge would want?

For an entire minute he sat and stared helplessly at Scourge, frozen in place despite the urge to just shake him awake. He didn't want Scourge to continue whatever awful dream he was having, but he also didn't fancy getting punched in the face, which was a very likely option even when Scourge was awake, never mind half asleep and still pumped full of adrenaline.

Finally, though, Scourge jerked awake with a strangled gasp, still for only a moment as he refamiliarised himself with his surroundings before he pushed himself up on shaky arms, still panting.

Sonic averted his eyes just as Scourge's landed on him.

He half expected Scourge to call him out for sitting and watching him during his nightmare; he sure as fuck wasn't shy about calling him out for anything else. But surprisingly, he didn't. He just kept staring at him in silence, wrestling his breathing back under control as his gaze drilled holes into Sonic's head. Sonic didn't turn to look at him, just stared straight ahead like he was very dedicated to his self assigned role and hadn't been contemplating dozing off for the past twenty minutes.

"You still up?" Scourge said at last.

"That's what someone who keeps watch does, yes."

"You don't stay awake when you keep watch. You, like, half sleep, half keep watch."

Damn. When did he notice that?

"I'm not tired yet."

"Bullshit, but whatever."

Neither of them spoke again for several minutes. Scourge sat up against the rock, drumming his fingers against his knee to a beat Sonic couldn't follow, and joined Sonic in staring straight ahead pretending to scan for threats they both knew damn well weren't coming.

Was Sonic supposed to ask him about it? Pry into the details of the nightmare? For what? Just to seem like a good friend? Fuck, this stuff had never made sense to him. Emotions were a battlefield he was... less than prepared for at the best of times, and for more delicate shit like this, he was far from the first choice for assistance, and he wanted to keep it like that. One wrong step just made things worse for everybody, but the right step changed from person to person, and how the fuck was Sonic supposed to magically know what the correct steps and words for each person were? Fighting robots or the moronic minions Robotnik had somehow managed to recruit was so much easier in comparison.

Again, there was a reason the other Freedom Fighters handled all the emotional shit. And why Amy frequently scolded him for being insensitive.

But the other Freedom Fighters weren't there. It was just Sonic. And as much as he hated dealing with situations like this, he also didn't want Scourge to be fucked off and upset.

But he also didn't want to make Scourge feel like he had to talk if he didn't want to.

"I don't want to talk about it," Scourge said suddenly before Sonic could come to a decision on if he should say something or not.

Well. That made it easier than just blindly guessing.

"Okay."

"Okay?"

"Okay."

Scourge squinted at him. "You're not gonna... try and make me talk about it? Encourage me to open up about my feelings?"

"Nope."

"Not gonna stick your hero nose where it don't belong?"

"I never stick my nose-"

"Yeah you do. That's, like, your whole thing. You wouldn't run around saving people if you always minded your own business."

... Damn it, he was kind of right, wasn't he?

"Look," Sonic said, still not looking over, "do you want to talk about it?"

"Fuck no."

"Then we won't."

Scourge huffed. Out of the corner of his eye, Sonic could see him fiddling with the zip on his jacket.

"... Why? Why aren't you pushing?"

Oh boy, honesty hours. Yay.

He could just brush it off. Say he didn't care, he had better things to do with his time, hearing about it wouldn't change anything because there was nothing he could do to help. He could just be the dick he knew Scourge probably expected him to be.

... Fuck, but he didn't want to.

"I hate it when people try to make me talk about shit I don't wanna talk about," Sonic said. It sounded more like an admittance from how quiet it was, like it was a dirty little secret he was sharing with Scourge and Scourge only. Which it wasn't, he made it perfectly clear that he hated being forced to talk about shit every time someone tried to make him, but... but it was different, somehow, saying it to Scourge under the quiet blanket of the night. "If you don't wanna talk about it, I'm the last guy who's gonna make you."

"... Huh. Everyone just always tells me to talk about shit 'cause apparently it'll make me feel better."

"Yeah." Sonic turned his gaze back up to the sky. "I hear that a lot, too."

They lapsed back into silence, or at least, as silent as it could be with Scourge fidgeting with his jacket. Sonic wanted to say it was a peaceful silence, but the conversation somehow didn't feel... done.

Sure enough, eventually Scourge piped back up, voice so much smaller and... less guarded, somehow, as he said, "You're really not gonna make me talk about it?"

Sonic paused. Tapped his leg as he thought over all the possible answers. He could just keep up the reassurance, or...

Amy kept telling him he was unapproachable and difficult to talk to sometimes, and kept nagging him to work on it. Normally he didn't care because he wouldn't know what to say anyway, but he was the only one around, and if Scourge needed it...

"If you want to talk, you can," Sonic said slowly, hoping he was doing this right. "I'm not... I can't tell you I'll say anything helpful, or anything at all, 'cause we both know I'm shit at this. But I can listen."

Scourge was silent.

"I'm not saying you should, or that you have to. I'm just saying, if you want to talk, talk. If you don't, don't. Up to you, I don't care either way." Fuck, that was rude. Oh well. Scourge was fluent in rude, so it was probably fine. "Just... do whatever helps."

There. That was the best he could do in terms of support. Happy, Amy?

Scourge stayed silent for a few more seconds. Then...

"It... it was about prison." The words were halting, hesitant. Like Scourge didn't know how this worked either. Like he was trying something new with Sonic. "Nothing... fuck, it wasn't even coherent. Just random shit I thought I'd forgotten about. Stupid inmates I can't even remember the names of anymore, acting like they're hot shit just 'cause they're bigger and stronger and have a whole gang..."

Scourge trailed off, voice shaky. When Sonic turned to look at him, he was running a hand through his quills like he was reassuring himself they were still there.

They used to be shorter when he first arrived, Sonic remembered. Shorter and choppy and just barely long or sharp enough for self defence.

"Guards did nothing, y'know? They didn't care. We was just a bunch of troublemakers who got what was coming to us to them. So they just let fucking anything happen. Didn't give a shit who got hurt or who started fights or who got their shit stolen. Fuck, they kept going on about rehabilitation like it was something they gave a fuck about, but they wouldn't've even cared if someone got killed in there-"

Scourge was shaking, fist buried in his quills and tugging on them as he stared at the ground, face scrunched up in rage.

Sonic hated it. He hated that look on Scourge's face. He hated that there was something much more fragile, much more vulnerable, hidden away under that rage. He hated that there was nothing he could do to make it go away.

Wordlessly, he shifted closer until his arm brushed against Scourge's.

"Just... it was shit." Scourge's head landed on his shoulder. Sonic didn't mention it. "It was shit and I fucking hated every minute of it. That's what it was about."

Sonic hummed. He didn't have anything to say in response, because what was there to be said? But Scourge was already relaxing against his shoulder, so he probably didn't need to.

Instead, he just linked his arm with Scourge's.

This time the silence between them was comfortable. Scourge was done, Sonic was done, they were both done, no more words required. Scourge was still leaning on Sonic, and apparently neither of them saw any reason for him to move, because Sonic didn't push him away and Scourge didn't bother pulling away.

It was nice. The night wasn't cold but Scourge was warm, and it was easy to relax with him leaning on him.

Unsurprisingly, it didn't take long for Scourge to fall asleep. Well. No point in moving him, was there? Sonic was already perfectly comfortable, and he didn't need to worry about waking up with a crick in his neck from an awkward sleeping position since he needed to stay awake anyway. He was on watch after all.

By the time the sun peeked over the horizon, Sonic was slumped over Scourge, cheek smushed against his head, fast asleep.

It just didn't feel like a risk anymore.

[lokh]

kyojuro makes me want to write the opposite of a fix it fic

[chexie]

hey kings

it’s y’girl!

...Please accept a sub 3000 chapter as my formal apology for deleting myself for almost a year

[starboundsingularities]

good lird they did not make a gimmick blog about a real life murder

#someone fucking DIED but whatever who gives a shit it's funny i guess

7 notes

🥚 eggvidenced Follow

honestly with how suspicious and confusing everything on the dl-6 case was i wouldn't be surprised if it came out that it was that prosecutor guy tbh

🌟 rockliker270 Follow

date posted: june 23, 2010

1,834,853 notes

⚖️ courtofpublicopinions Follow

🌟 rockliker270 Follow

ok hear me out. what abt winston payne though

🧊 just--ice Follow

okay now they're just making lawyers up

#also didn't mvk die or something?

28,932 notes

🔥 triedbyfire Follow

why the fuck are you people still posting about the gavinners as if theyre not copaganda. didn't the guitarist get convicted of murder

🎸 guiltiest-lovers837 Follow

so fucking tired of this "um um didn't daryan get convicted of murder" YEAH AND HE'S LITERALLY NOT IN THE FUCKING BAND ANYMORE. dipshit

🔥 triedbyfire Follow

are you gonna address the copaganda thing or

1,092 notes

🌻 attorneybout Follow

he's so. 😳

📂 trialanderror Follow

why is he defending

📂 trialanderror Follow

OP WHY IS HE DEFENDING???

24,374 notes

🦈 giantlakemonsters Follow

i just wanna hear about another gourdy sighting thats all

🥜 liberdeez Follow

op. i'm so sorry op. gourdy isn't real you have to let her go. they had a whole trial about it.

🔐 wrightorwrong Follow

hi!! so this isn't actually the case as while gourdy was briefly mentioned in a trial, said trial had nothing to do with whether or not gourdy was "real" per se as much as. well. murder, actually. while gourdy WAS found out to be an inflatable steel samurai this was not brought up in the case at all as the veracity of gourdy wasn't really as relevant as the fact that the witness was looking for gourdy rather than at the murder she claimed to have seen. plus this was also a relatively small part of a MUCH larger trial which for those interested not only solved the dl-6 case but ALSO marked the end of prosecutor von karma's ~40 year long record and the court records are really a fascinating read through!!

🦀 mad_libz_87 Follow

net 0 information post

#thanks again lawblr

94,834 notes

🍒 cherriescoola Follow

btw i was at the park the other day and klavier gavin (of gavinners fame) was there and obv there was a huge crowd but this guy was there with him and at some point he (the other guy) waved to the crowd and someone still screamed like it was klavier??? who was that guy ive never seen him before in my life

2,284 notes

🩸 has-dl6-been-solved-yet Follow

December 28, 2016

YES!!!

702,947 notes

🪙 tellerlikeitis Follow

guys help i'm a bank teller and this guy just introduced himself as robin banks what do i do

🔪 violencekilling Follow

you gotta let him rob you that's the law

302,948 notes

👻 ghostesswiththemostest Follow

look if i ever get convicted of murder im just hiring the lawyer with the coolest sounding name

💼 courtofwaw Follow

bestie if you already got convicted it is Too Late

62,193 notes

📋 lawandwhoreder Follow

guys i know it's real fun to think people just can predict whatever but if you look at the earliest reblogs of that post that "guessed" the true killer in the dl-6 case it was actually a post about how they didn't want to go to the store. clearly edited

#stg nobody bothers to factcheck anything anymore

7,293 notes

🐺 lawnewolf Follow

i am NOT homophobic or whatever the fuck you guys are saying now i just think its weird to write fanfiction about realass people?? go touch grass ffs

🌈 lawsbian Follow

the fun police (this guy) putting me in yaoi court but the lawyers (phoenix witrght and miles edgeworth) just keep trying to make out (real court is like this too btw)

🐺 lawnewolf Follow

YOU HAVE SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOU.

#look idc what your enemies to lovers fic bullshit says #they're straight. and more importantly REAL PEOPLE. #there's TENSION because they are in COURT and there are LIVES on the LINE. #not because they wanna fuck. god.

12,293 notes

🔮 inhighspirits Follow

why dont they just ask the spirit mediums to ask the victims who killed them this law shit is easy

837,495 notes

💞 lawveyourself Follow

seriously i cant believe they gave this guy a law degree

💞 lawveyourself Follow

what do you mean evidence fraud

503,893 notes

🎧 instrumentalillness Follow

fuck you *unguilties your love*

384,568 notes

🎀 copiicat Follow

perjury isnt illegal btw in fact if youre one of tge witnesses youre legally required to lie on the stand. thats why everyone does it. trust me

[kiss-inthekitchen]

no vacancy | spencer reid

pairing: spencer reid x reader

set sometime in early s2; you get stuck sharing a room with your favorite boy genius who absolutely cannot know that you have feelings for him. and also, there’s only one bed. fluff, f!reader (i think there's only two usages of gender markers)

word count: 4.7k

notes: this is a rework of a very old fic i used to have up on ao3. i'm thinking i'll do more of these, i've got a few spencer fics in the vault and it was fun to rework this and see how my style has changed :)

You shivered against the cold desert air. Twirling a keyring around your finger, you headed for the door marked 3. You were exhausted from the day and so, so ready to collapse into bed as soon as you got inside your room. 

You turned the key in the lock while Spencer waited behind you. It was late, and you and the team had pulled into a motel for the night, having been dragged out to a tiny rural town by the unsub after days of tracking him through surrounding areas. He’d been apprehended, finally, and handed over to local police around midnight. You all had decided it best to spend the night before driving back into town in the morning for take off. 

So here you were, at one of those single story motels that still used actual keys instead of key cards. Given the time of night, you knew vacancies would be scarce, so you’d already expected to have to double up on rooms. Gideon had stayed behind at Quantico, leaving Hotch and Morgan in one room and JJ and Prentiss in another, with you and Spencer sharing the last room. You’d hung back while JJ got everything figured out with the concierge (who was just a bored looking kid posted at the desk), and then she’d passed you your key with its little keyring attachment listing the room number and you all bade each other goodnight.

You’d been on the team nearly a year already, but you were still the rookie compared to everyone else. Even Spence had two years on you. But seeing as you two were the youngest, and the least inclined toward the more physical parts of your job– the chasing, tackling, firing your weapon parts– you were paired off with him more often than not. 

You weren’t complaining. You’d come to know Spencer pretty well, and you didn’t feel much apprehension at the thought of sharing a room with him for one night. 

That is, until you opened the door. 

“Oh,” you said involuntarily.  

"There's only one bed,” Spencer said. 

“Sure looks that way.” 

"At least it's a queen?" 

There was a brief pause before you both started speaking at the same time. 

"Maybe we can go back to the concierge–" Spencer began. 

"I mean, I guess I don't really–" 

"–although, JJ did say we got the last–" 

"–mind as long as you–" 

You cut yourself off this time. It’s not like there was another good option, unless one of you wanted to sleep in the car. "This is fine?" it came out as a question rather than a statement. 

"I think so? I wouldn't want to– to make you uncomfortable or anything."

"This is fine," you repeated, more sure of yourself this time. “And you don’t make me uncomfortable.”  

It was only kind of a lie. You trusted Spencer with your life, of course. But he also made you nervous. He was sweet, kind, always seeming genuinely interested in anything you had to say. And of course, anyone could see that he was attractive. You were developing feelings for him, and in a job where your coworkers and your crush himself were all adept at reading people, it really wasn’t a good position for you to be in. You just hoped Spencer was as oblivious with women as Derek made him out to be. 

"We should get out of the doorway," Spencer suggested, and you realized you'd been standing in the threshold this whole time.

"Right."

The two of you walked in, Spencer closing and locking the door behind you. It was a modest room in a tiny town; your standard ugly-patterned, faded bedspread draped over the queen bed in the center, a window looking out into the parking lot, and a dresser that didn’t even have a TV on top of it. You headed straight for the bed, sitting on the edge and removing your shoes while Spencer stood by with his hands in his pockets.

"You know, if it's a problem I can sleep on the cou– uh, the chair," Spencer offered, looking back mid-sentence and realizing that the only additional furniture this motel offered was one rigid looking armchair by the window. 

"No, you're not doing that."

"What?" he asked, taken aback by the quickness of your response.

"You're not sleeping in that chair. It looks horribly uncomfortable and I’m sure it’s never been cleaned, and I know how you’d feel about that.” 

Spencer grimaced, not having thought about that particular detail. “Yeah, but, I mean… I’d do it for you.” 

God, why did he have to say stuff like that? Like you were something special. And why now, when you were stuck in the same room with him until morning? It probably didn’t even mean the same thing to him as it meant to you. He was one of the most caring people you’d ever met. He’d probably say that to any one of you on the team. 

Or maybe sleeping in a chair meant nothing to him at all. Maybe he actually didn’t want to share the bed with you and that’s why he was trying so hard to avoid it. 

Ugh. You just wanted this day to be over. It was late, the case had been a week long, and now you were probably in for a fun night of overthinking and second guessing when you’d been expecting silence and easy, dreamless sleep. 

Okay, maybe that last part was never really an option, but still. 

“Look,” you sighed, “I know this isn't an ideal situation but there's a perfectly good bed here, so let’s just share it. If you’re okay with that. It's just one night and tomorrow we'll be back home and nobody has to know about it."

You had to fight from squeezing your eyes shut in regret. You wished that had come out differently. You chanced a look at Spencer, realizing that you’d been staring down at the faded carpet pattern while you spoke. 

The look on his face was one you hadn’t seen before, and you almost couldn't place it. He seemed sort of disappointed. Disappointed that he had to share a bed with you? Or that you'd made it sound like you didn't want to share a bed with him? Nope, you could not go down that road tonight. You shook your head once as if it would clear the thoughts from your tired mind. 

“I’m okay with that," he said, casually enough that you could almost convince yourself that you’d just imagined the look on his face before. "So, do you want the shower first, or...?" Spencer asked.

"No, I can wait, you go ahead," you said. You desperately needed the moment to yourself anyway.  

You started rifling through your bag for pajamas, toiletries, and your charger as an excuse to look busy while Spencer made his way into the bathroom with his things. As soon as the door closed behind him, you flopped back on the bed, staring up at the ceiling as if it might hold all the answers. 

Spencer couldn't know about your feelings. For one thing, you were pretty sure there was a rule against dating your colleagues in the BAU. If not, there probably should be. You were such a close knit team, and if anything went wrong… you couldn’t imagine how difficult that would be. But then, the evil and uncooperative part of you also couldn’t help but think that things might go right. 

From the beginning of your time at the BAU, you’d been drawn to Spencer. It just kind of made sense. You’d gotten through school at an accelerated pace– though not as quickly as him, the man was on another fucking level when it came to academics– and you were one of the only people who found his fact dropping actually interesting, often asking him follow up questions. He’d looked adorably shocked the first few times you’d done that. 

He listened intently to your passionate rants about your favorite films and tv shows, even though he hadn’t seen any of them. When the two of you had discovered a shared interest in mythology and folklore, Hotch nearly had to separate you so you would actually get some work done. It was like you were a kid in school again, and you might’ve been embarrassed if you didn’t find it so funny, if you weren’t so giddy at the idea of a friendship that could make you feel like a kid again. 

Spencer understood you in a way that other people didn’t, laughing at your jokes even when they didn’t land for anybody else. When people interrupted or spoke over you, he always paid attention, and in situations where you were trying to add details to the profile he’d bring the conversation back around to you. 

Throughout your life you’d learned– through painstaking trial and error– to fit in pretty well in most any group you found yourself in, but you’d always considered yourself to be a little weird. A little too different. But when you were with Spencer, you felt like you didn’t have to try so hard. You could both be a little different, together. 

Spencer opened the bathroom door then, startling you. You’d been so lost in thought you hadn’t even noticed the water turn off. You looked over to see him wearing a loose white t-shirt and pajama pants, his hair still damp. And now you knew what Spencer looked like fresh out of a shower. And of course it was endearing as hell. 

“If that’s how you’re planning to sleep,” Spencer began, referencing how you were laid out in the dead center of the bed, your arms fully outstretched and hands hanging off the mattress, “then I think we might have a slight problem after all.”  

You walked out of the bathroom a short while later, dressed in your usual sleepwear of shorts and an oversized shirt. You’d put your hair up in a bun to protect it while you showered, and now it hung loose around your shoulders. You simultaneously wished your outfit was cuter and uglier; knowing your giant t-shirt wasn’t flattering your figure while also feeling like you had too much skin exposed. Not that it mattered. You were just going to get some sleep and then wake up in the morning and head home. Everything would be back to normal. 

Spencer’s in bed already. He’d turned off the big light while you were showering, the lamps on either side of the bed casting him in a softer, warmer glow. He looked up from his book to find you standing there, and the soft, familiar look in his big brown eyes had you rooted to the spot. 

“Hey,” he said softly, patting the space next to him in invitation. 

You conceded, finding your legs again and sliding into bed beside him. “Hey.” 

He fidgeted with the pages of his book, ultimately shutting it closed on his index finger to mark the page. “So, uh, are we okay?” 

“Yeah, of course,” you answered genuinely, feeling bad that your internal struggle had manifested in a way that worried him. 

“Okay, cool,” he said. He paused long enough to let you explain if you wanted to, another invitation. You knew he wouldn’t push it if you didn’t offer something up. You wanted to give him an explanation, but you couldn’t bring yourself to. 

“Sorry,” you managed. 

“For what?” 

“I don’t know… acting weird, I guess. It’s just been a long day.” 

“Oh, well, you don’t need to be sorry about that. You’re always weird.” 

Your mouth dropped open as you looked at him. “Look who’s fucking talking,” you scoffed. Some of the tension dropped from your shoulders, glad he hadn’t questioned you further. 

“Language, please,” he held up a hand to stop you. “I’m delicate.” 

“Wha–?” you let out a surprised little laugh. “You’re an idiot!” 

“Yeah okay, tell that to my I–.” 

“Oh, my IQ of 187,” you finished for him, rolling your eyes. Even that was full of endearment. “God, you are so annoying.” 

“Hm. Y’know, this might be a long night for you. I’d hate to keep you up with my annoyingness.” 

“I feel like you could’ve come up with a better word than annoyingness, Mr. 187,” you tilted your head where it rested against the headboard, looking up at him. 

“Oh, she’s being a smartass now!” he split into a surprised grin, and you could swear your heart skipped a beat. 

“You just said ass.” 

“Wow. How quickly you’ve corrupted me.” 

“Right, of course. It’s my fault.” 

“I knew you’d agree.” 

“Shut the fuck up,” you laughed. 

Things felt a little bit more normal after that, joking around with Spencer like you normally did made the rest of the night feel less daunting. 

Shortly after that, the two of you agreed that you should get some sleep, each reaching over to turn out the light on your respective sides of the bed. 

You let yourself sink into your pillow, the exhaustion you had been feeling giving way to a hyper awareness of Reid’s body next to you. You were kept awake, completely overcome by the foot of space between you and Spencer; the consequences of crossing that space, the way it might feel, the curiosity over whether he was laying awake too, thinking the same thoughts as you. Even with that foot of space separating you, you could feel his body heat. You longed to move closer to him, to touch him, to let his warmth seep into you and lull you to sleep. 

But you didn’t, and you wouldn’t, because this was just an unfortunate booking mishap. It didn’t mean anything. Tomorrow it would be over, and you could more easily go back to hiding your feelings from everyone else and yourself. 

Eventually, exhaustion won out. 

You woke what could’ve been a few minutes or a few hours later, the sky still dark. You couldn’t tell what exactly had woken you up, only the sense that you’d moved, almost like you’d fallen. But fallen from what? 

You blinked in the dark, the street lamps in the parking lot providing enough residual light to keep the room from being pitch black. 

Reid was sitting up. He must’ve bolted upright, you thought. Had that been what moved you? Were you lying on him?! 

“Hey, you okay?” 

“Sorry. Just a nightmare,” he said as if it was nothing. “Sorry to wake you.” 

“What was it about?” you ignored his apologies, sitting up as well. 

“I don't really even remember,” he breathed, almost like it was funny. “Just having a physiological reaction to whatever it was, I guess.” 

You had nightmares too, of course. You all did. You hated remembering them, but you also hated the times when you woke up in the dark, dazed and inexplicably scared. Without thinking, you reached for his hand. 

He turned to look at you then. “I really didn't mean to wake you,” he reiterated. 

“I figured,” you smiled slightly. You noticed his breathing was just a bit too fast. You rubbed your thumb over the back of his hand, leaning over to rest your weight against his side, your head on his shoulder. His nervous system would regulate itself quicker this way. 

“You were on my pillow, by the way.” 

“What?” you ask, your head jerking back from him. 

“I totally called it. You rolled right into the center of the bed in your sleep. Total bed hog.” 

“Hey!” you protested, pulling your hand back from his in embarrassment. So you had been lying on top of him. Or at least really close to him. His hand chased after yours, finding you again. 

“That wasn’t me complaining about it.” 

“Oh,” was all you could think to say back. 

It was quiet for a minute. You let your head fall back onto Spencer’s shoulder, but your heart raced in your chest. 

“Can I ask you something?” he questioned, his tone becoming more serious. 

“Oh– of course,” you answered, your brow creasing. 

“What did you mean when you said ‘it’s not ideal’ and ‘nobody has to know about it’?” 

“Wh– I– Spencer, come on.” 

He didn’t give you an out this time. Just waited for an answer. 

“I don’t even really know,” you sighed.  

“I believe you’re being partially truthful about that.” 

“Don’t profile me.” 

“I’m not. I just know you.” 

You sighed. “You know, sometimes I hate that stupid memory of yours.” 

“I don’t need an eidetic memory to remember that. It was a weird thing to say, and it happened like four hours ago.” 

“You’re guesstimating. And it wasn’t that weird.” 

“Maybe not, but the way you said it was. And you’re avoiding my question.” 

You continued to avoid it, biting down on your bottom lip. 

“And you stuttered when I brought it up.” 

“I told you to stop profiling me.” 

This time, he just hummed in response. 

“And so what if I stuttered?” 

“Stuttering is usually more my thing. A nervousness thing.” 

Maybe this was actually your nightmare. Maybe you’d wake up soon and none of this would’ve been real, and you wouldn’t have had to explain to Spencer that the reason you’d had an attitude was because the situation tonight had made it harder to hide your feelings for him. Big feelings that became a lot harder to ignore when he was this close to you, still holding your hand, the mix of scents from his detergent and deodorant clouding your judgment. Of all the embarrassing scenarios that you could’ve imagined playing out tonight, this was very high up on the list. 

“I said ‘it’s not ideal’ because it’s not, just by definition. We were supposed to get a double room and we didn’t. Not ideal. And I said no one has to find out because I can already see Morgan having a field day with it and I know the exact expression that’ll be on his face–” 

“The eyebrows,” he nodded, lips pursed. 

“And then everyone else will get in on it and I just figured…” you sighed. “I don’t know. I didn’t want to deal with that.” 

“That all makes total sense.” 

“Good,” you breathed. Too relieved. 

“Now tell me the rest of it.” 

“God, Spencer–” you huffed out, frustrated. He knew you too well. 

You wanted to run. Maybe you could go sleep in the car after all. And then ignore Spencer for the rest of the day, and then the year, and your life, and– 

“Don’t make me say it,” you breathed. This had to be a dream. 

“But there is something to be said?” he questioned, his tone hushed, almost reverent. 

It was just vague enough. You could pretend it was nothing. 

“Yes.” 

You felt like you’d just blown your life up with one word. 

Spencer took a deep breath, your body cresting and falling with the movement of it. 

“You make me feel better about being myself,” he confessed.  

You shut your eyes. You had a constricting feeling in your throat suddenly, and the awful realization that you might cry. 

He spoke again, because you couldn’t. “I haven’t always felt good about it, you know? And then you joined the team, and, well– you changed a lot of things for me. And you’re beautiful, obviously, and I was scared to mess up what we have, because it’s special, I think–” 

“It is.” 

“–and then you started freaking out when you saw the bed,” he was smiling now, you could hear it, “and I thought, maybe it wouldn’t be so crazy… maybe I could make you feel that way too.” 

“You do. Of course you do. I feel like I can be my full self with you. I don’t know that I’ve ever felt like that before.” 

Spencer laughed, a little delirious giggle, and squeezed your hand in his. You’d managed to avoid crying, thankfully, and you grinned along with him, looking down at your joined hands as you squeezed him back. 

Things seemed to still for a beat, the two of you sitting with this moment and letting it stretch out. You still couldn’t really believe this was happening. You might have to tell Spencer to pinch you. 

“So what does that mean for us now?” you asked. 

“Well, for right now at least, I think it just means that we can go back to sleep without overthinking things into oblivion.” 

“I was not–”

“Okay, this time I am profiling you, and you’re lying,” he cut you off, his smile still evident.  

“Oh, this was such a mistake.”

He continued like you hadn’t spoken, laughing a little as he went. “I could practically hear it. It’s like, you know when a computer is trying to use too much processing power and the fan starts whirring really loud? Like that but just like right next to me, like tangible—“  

“Okay! Thank you so much, I actually totally got it, you can stop now.” 

He laughed, and your cheeks warmed. 

“For the record, I meant we could both stop overthinking.” Then he shifted a little, facing you a bit more. With the hand that wasn’t holding yours, he brushed a strand of hair from your face, a fake pout on his lips. “Sorry I make you nervous.” 

You cackled at that, if it was possible to cackle in hushed tones. “Oh, I bet you are. Besides, I know you like me now, so you’ve lost that card.” 

“Are you certain of that?” 

“Certain that you like me or certain that you can’t make me nervous?” 

“The latter. I do like you, if that was unclear.” 

Your heart sped up, contradicting you as you answered, “Then I’m certain you can’t make me nervous.” 

He titled your face up to his then, using his index finger underneath your chin to make you look at him. “You’re an awful liar.” 

You just shrugged, watching triumphantly as Spencer’s gaze fell to your lips.“It’s been working out pretty well for me so far.” 

“I guess it has,” he murmured, closing the distance between you and finally kissing you. 

After so many months of imagining (and berating yourself for imagining) what Spencer’s lips might feel like on yours, you weren’t disappointed. 

For once you didn’t have to think at all, the chemistry between you and him drowning out everything else. His hand fell to your waist, and yours moved to the curve of his jaw, pulling him closer as his mouth moved against yours. Your teeth grazed his bottom lip and he gasped, and your skin felt like it was lit up from the inside. 

You pulled away to breathe, and to process, and to try and stop your head from swimming. You were rewarded with the awestruck look in Spencer’s eyes as he opened them again. 

“Okay, was it just me, or–” 

“That was crazy,” you breathed.

“Crazy,” he agreed. 

“Spence?” 

“Yeah?” 

“I don’t think we’re getting back to sleep tonight.” Your eyes widened at the implication of saying those words at that time. “Not, like, in the sex way, though,” you hurried to correct yourself. “I need like, 4-5 business days to process things first, and I– well, I just meant, like– you know?” 

Spencer was nodding at you even as his eyebrows pulled together in a frown. “Can I still kiss you during those 4-5 business days?” 

“Oh, yeah,” you said, sounding breathless. 

“Cool,” he agreed. “You seem really nervous, by the way.” 

“Well, you kissed me.” 

“I did.”  

“How were you not nervous?” you breathed. 

“Oh, I was. Your reaction is making me feel a whole lot better about it though.” 

You scoffed half-heartedly. “I do so much for you.” 

“You do,” he replied earnestly, letting go of your hand to wrap his arm around your shoulders as he pressed a kiss to your forehead. “We could lie back down, if you want. Like we were before I so rudely woke you up.” 

“Yeah, I’m super mad about that,” you joked. “Anyway, I was asleep for that, so you’ll have to show me what I was doing.” 

He seemed all too pleased to do so. “Okay, so you were basically like,” he leaned back against the pillows, pulling you down with him, moving his hand to the side of your head to guide you to the place where his shoulder met his chest, “Like that, and then your arm was over here,” he picked up your arm and guided it around his waist. 

“Oh god, that’s so embarrassing,” you said, realizing that he must’ve been awake when you’d done it. 

“Yeah, I know. Really terrible time for me.” 

“I can imagine. I can scoot back over to my side of the bed, just say the word.” 

“Don’t you dare,” he said, squeezing you closer. 

You trailed your fingers up and down his waist, feeling more content than you had in ages. 

“I can’t believe you’d suggest that I would have sex with you right after confessing my feelings. Like, take me to dinner first at least.” 

“Oh my god,” you half-exclaimed, half-laughed. You felt your cheeks heat up again, grateful it was still too dark in the room to be noticeable. “You’re right, I’m so sorry. How’s next Friday?” 

“Hmm, I don’t know. My work schedule is kind of unpredictable. I’ll have to get back to you.” 

“You’re such an ass.” 

A few short hours later, you were back on the jet with the rest of the team. You were lying on the couch while Spencer sat in a seat one row up and across from you, both to avoid suspicion and so you could try to catch up on sleep. He sat facing away from you, but with the angle you were at you could still see one side of his face if you tilted your head up. 

You were just beginning to fade when your phone buzzed next to you. 

Spencer: I have to tell you something, coworker to coworker. 

You looked up to see him blank faced, looking down at the book in his right hand, holding his phone in the left. 

You text back: okay? 

Spencer: My crush asked me out last night. 

You’re exceptionally glad no one was sitting close enough to see you. Spencer had caught you off guard, and you felt an infatuated grin spreading across your face. 

You: what did u say? 

Spencer: Wanted to get your opinion first. 

You: i think u should say yes, obviously. 

Spencer: Idk, I’m kinda nervous. I think she’s trying to jump me on the first date.

You just barely managed to refrain from laughing out loud. You looked up at Spencer again, and he’s looking at his phone as if it contained nothing more than a weather report. You’re astounded. 

You: one could argue that technically you’ve already slept together, so there’s less to be nervous abt

You saw his eyebrows raise just slightly. Success. 

Spencer: You’re trouble, you know that? See you Friday night

You: i promise i won’t try to jump you 

Spencer: Oh

Spencer: I fear I may have shot myself in the foot here

You: i wouldn’t worry about it too much

Spencer: That’s rich coming from you 

You rolled your eyes even though he couldn't see you. 

You: whatever. wear something sexy ;) 

You heard him blow air out of his nose, an almost laugh. 

“Something funny?” you heard Derek ask. 

Shit. 

“This book contains a historical inaccuracy that was proven incorrect eight years before its publishing date,” Spencer replied without missing a beat. 

Unbelievable.

You: you’re unhinged :*

Spencer: Go to sleep already, would you? 

You: coworker to coworker? my crush keeps interrupting my beauty sleep 

Spencer: He’s probably worried about the worldwide implications of you becoming any more beautiful 

You: i guess that’s why the universe gave you insomnia :( too pretty 

Spencer: Stop flirting with me

You: bc you’re too delicate?? 

Spencer: Yes 

You snapped your phone shut, feeling dazed. You watched the clouds go by in the window across from you, and you couldn’t help letting your gaze slide over to Spencer. He’d put his phone down as well, concentrating on his book. Or pretending to concentrate. He was turning the pages much too slowly for his actual pace. 

You: you have got to do a better job of fake reading than that

You heard a page turn. 

You looked up again to see the ghost of a smile threatening the corner of his mouth. 

This was going to be fun. And also, you were so screwed. 

[halfvalid]

through the night

ABOUT

| 18+ | smut | explicit |

characters: live action!roronoa zoro | fem!reader

pairing: live action!roronoa zoro x fem!reader

word count: 4.2k

description: zoro comes to the reader's room during the night. sex ensues.

tags: smut, female reader, oral (receiving), fingering, vaginal sex, creampie, kissing (a lot of it), soft zoro, first time together, confessions (kinda), fluff, no use of "y/n", banter, pwp (lowkey).

author's note: consent is sexy and so is zoro

i have up to now only watched 2 episodes of OPLA and have never consumed any other type of one piece media. expect him to be ooc. also it's my first smut fic help

It was nighttime on the Going Merry, and the dull kiss of the setting horizon drifted lazily through the single window in your room. You were lying on your bed, leaning against the headboard as you flipped through a book you’d picked up the last time the ship had been docked. It wasn’t too interesting, but it was something to pass the time with, so you stifled a yawn and flipped to the next page.

There was a knock at your door, and you glanced up, watching as the shoddy metal hinges slowly creaked open. Zoro was standing in the doorway, his broad frame blocking out nearly all the light coming in from the hall. He was still dressed in his daywear, which reminded you that you needed to change—the loose shirt and trousers you wore were, although clean, nothing near sleepwear.

“Zoro?” you asked, watching as he started into the room. You clicked your tongue before he could step another foot inside, though— “If you’re going to come in, take your shoes off.”

Zoro scoffed but obeyed, pausing by the mouth of the room to slide his heavy boots off. He tread lightly to where you lay, climbing up to sit on the edge of the bed beside you. “What’s up?”

“Can’t sleep,” Zoro answered. You moved aside to allow him some more room, centering yourself on the bed. Zoro didn’t move, though.

You raised your eyebrows. “That’s possible?”

He looked unimpressed, propping his arms under his head and leaning back so his head was splayed against your thighs. His three matching earrings glinted in the light. “Luffy and Nami are being loud. Your room’s the farthest away.”

“Your elbow is digging into my gut,” you said, turning back towards your book. Zoro rolled his eyes, but readjusted his position, pulling his arms down to instead lay folded atop his stomach. “Are you just going to nap there?”

Zoro shrugged, and you had to stifle a giggle, the sensation vaguely ticklish. He’d never been a man of many words, so you lowered your book again and went back to reading. The light in the room was dim, though; after a few minutes, the glow from the light at your bedside no longer sufficed, and you were too tired to strain your eyes to squint at the page. You could, of course, just turn on the cabin lights—but Zoro was asleep by now, and you hadn’t even liked the book that much anyway.

You set it on your nightstand, gazing down at the slumbering man in your lap. Despite the glare he so often sported, Zoro looked near-angelic in his sleep, his face all smooth planes and straight lines. Those dark eyes of his were hidden like this, black lashes splayed across his cheeks as shadows emphasized the hollows of his bone structure.

He really was beautiful, an ever-comforting presence within the Straw Hats that your eyes had always strayed to. There was a certain kind of fondness you held for him that none of the other crew members could quite compare to, although if you voiced those thoughts Luffy would probably end up giving you a lighthearted scolding. You could already imagine the teasing from the other members of the crew—Usopp and Sanji particularly—making fun of your little crush, which is why you kept your lips firmly sealed. A secret was a secret, and this was yours to keep.

You finally tore your eyes away, focusing instead on getting out of the position you’d gotten stuck in. Somewhere in the back of your mind you liked the idea of Zoro sleeping in your lap, but the clothes you wore were getting increasingly uncomfortable. You carefully slipped out from under him, cradling his head so as to support him as you gently lowered him to the mattress. Thankfully, he didn’t rouse, and you slipped to the other side of the room to open up your wardrobe, satisfied knowing you weren’t disturbing him.

You made deft work, first brushing through your hair and rinsing your face with some clean water before focusing your attention on changing your clothes. You removed your trousers, instead donning a pair of shorts. You were halfway through peeling off your blouse to replace it with a softer, silk one, when Zoro coughed from behind you.

You froze, daring to glance behind you whilst still topless. Zoro had awoken, eyes having lost all trace of sleep as he slowly sat up, staring at your figure across the room. He coughed again as soon as your eyes met, dropping his gaze. “Sorry,” he said very carefully, voice hoarse and grating.

“No, it’s okay,” you managed out, but you were still frozen. Your thoughts were on the dark look that’d been in his eyes the split-second before he’d looked away—surprised but sharp, cutting like just his gaze could pierce through your soul. Gooseflesh had prickled up along your arms.

“I’ll just… go,” Zoro muttered, already having gotten up as he started shuffling towards the door. You jolted into action, nearly dropping the shirt still in your hands as you turned towards him.

“No, you can—” your words softened, seeing his gaze flicker rapidly around your figure before finally landing on some spot by your cheek. “You can stay.” You paused, hoping your words weren’t too direct. “If you want.”

“You should put your shirt on,” Zoro said, almost choking on his words, like they were too big to fit in his mouth.

Your gaze dropped down before a steady blush started climbing up the sides of your face. “Right,” you started, but it was like you’d lost control of your hands. The shirt still hung limply from your grip.

“Or you could…” Zoro paused, lips parted as he sucked in a soft breath. Carefully, he moved back towards your bed, the only sound in the room a soft thump as he sat back on it. “Not.”

You swallowed. You could barely feel the lax of grip as your fingers released the shirt, letting it fall to the floor in one pathetic heap. You took a tentative step towards Zoro, and then another, until you were right in front of him. The soft night breeze through the window caused chills to erupt down your spine. Or maybe that was Zoro’s expression—nearly studious in his attentivity, eyes grazing across your chest and torso like he was taking in information for a new, particularly high-paying bounty.

“Zoro,” you started. He finally glanced up at your face, and you shuddered, biting down hard on your tongue. “I, um—hi.”

“Hey,” he said carefully, like he was testing the word on his tongue. Your gaze flickered down to his lips. He seemed to notice, but he didn’t say anything; rather, he raised one of his hands, pressing it against your side until his fingers tightened against your waist, a present, ever-pulsing rush of warmth. “I think my chest is bigger than yours.”

You flushed, a quick rush of crimson gracing your cheeks as you turned away. Zoro’s grip on your waist tightened, and a low laugh escaped the bottom of his throat. “That was mean,” you whined. Zoro’s other hand came up to your face, fingers pressing against the underside of your chin. He carefully angled your face down, so you couldn’t look anywhere but straight at him.

“It worked to calm you down, though,” he said easily. You were about to protest against the fact that you had been calm in the first place, but then Zoro was kissing you.

Zoro was a lot less aggressive than you’d originally expected, but as you sunk deeper into the kiss, it started to make sense. Zoro was all clean lines when he fought, practiced and perfect—no space for sloppy lines or scribbles. The way he kissed was similar; he applied pressure, but not too much pressure, and his thumb traced firm circles into the skin of your waist.

He angled your head with the hand firmly propped against your jaw, so you didn’t have to do a lot of the work—just press against his lips and move against the gentle rhythm he’d set. His teeth scraped carefully against your lower lip, and he tugged, letting a soft gasp out from your throat.

Zoro took the opportunity to pry your lips apart with his tongue, the fingers splayed against your chin coaxing your jaw open until he could slide his tongue against yours. You let out a soft whimper, hands scrambling to his shoulders and running along the muscles of his back. Of course you’d known he was well-built, but the firmness of his body forced another squeak out of you—one he was more than willing to swallow up.

Eventually, Zoro’s hand dropped from your jaw, skimming along your body line before coming to rest on the underside of one of your breasts. You gasped as he started to massage the skin with his thumb, accidentally biting down on his lower lip in the process. He groaned, the sound low as his rhythm sped up, the hand cupping your waist dropping down to your hip.

And then he was hoisting you up and onto his lap. “Oh my God,” you muttered, causing him to break away, eyes glinting with amusement.

“What?”

A heady rush had blossomed along your cheeks again. “Nothing. You.” Somewhere in the back of your head, you wondered how strong Zoro had to be to lift you off the ground so easily with only one arm—granted, it hadn’t been that far of a lift, but still. “Kiss me again.”

Zoro laughed but obeyed, his hand still working at your breast as the other dropped to your thigh. Your fingers interlaced with his short hair, tangling within the moss-green locks as his tongue ran along the ivories of your teeth. His teeth scraped against your lip as he moved away, lips instead following the line of your jaw and moving down to your neck.

You dropped your arm from his hair, hand pressing flat against his upper back. Zoro’s muscles flexed as he chased down your throat, and you sighed as he pressed gentle kisses along the line of your vein.

“Been—wanting to do this for a while,” Zoro panted between kisses, placing a final one kiss at the junction of your collarbone before glancing tentatively back up at you. You met his mouth in another kiss, a smile you hadn’t felt rising bright along your cheekbones.

“Me too,” you whispered, and a look of relief flashed across his face before he was ducking his head again to press more kisses along your neck. You let out a laugh—you could feel the rumble of his lips against the sound as it left your throat. Carefully, you ran your finger along his earrings, soft clinks filling the room at the action. “What was that? Did you think I didn’t?”

“Dunno,” Zoro muttered, and you laughed again before he nipped at your skin, teeth scratching in a gentle bite. At your chest, his hand squeezed your nipple, and you gasped.

“That was mean.”

“Mhm.” Zoro didn’t seem appeased, his kisses turning sloppier—open-mouthed, full of bite. He never pressed down hard enough to hurt, but your mouth was full of soft gasps and whines, and your hand had come down to clench against his bicep. God, his arms. “I don’t hear you complaining.”

You nudged him, meaning only for it to be a slight press. But Zoro let the action guide him, falling onto his back with you pressed against him, flat against the bed. He stilled, both hands dropping to your hips as he gaze lifted to drink you in.

You were certain you were a mess—blushing, lips probably swollen, bruise blossoms that would purple by morning scattered all along your neck. But the way he looked at you made it seem like you were all dolled up—like you were outfitted in a flowing gown, eyes sparkling and hair perfect instead of the mess it most undoubtedly was.

“You’re pretty,” he murmured, almost too quiet to hear. Actually, you were certain you weren’t supposed to hear it, because before you could respond, he was pulling you across him, fluidly rolling you onto your back. His forearm pressed against the mattress beside your head, caging you in. Zoro seemed to like this angle, moving down your neck to your chest with more gentle kisses.

You were content to let him take what he wanted, eyes not moving from his face as you watched his lips brush over your breast. His tongue was hot against your skin, and you sucked in a tight breath as he swirled it along your nipple. Zoro steadied you with a firm grasp, hand pressing against your side before pushing up to attend to the breast that his mouth wasn’t. You squirmed, a soft pool of warmth sitting in your lower belly as he worked. A tight knot had formed somewhere inside, and you let out a breathy gasp.

Zoro’s gaze traced lower, hand leaving your breast in favor of skidding down your figure to rest at the hand of your shorts. He paused, eyes flickering upwards to meet yours. Hastily, you nodded, and his fingers dipped below the cloth, head lowering to press another kiss by your hip bone. Your hands clenched against the bed sheets as his fingers skimmed the rim of your shorts, coaxing them down inch by inch before they finally slid down to your knees. You kicked them off insistently, and Zoro laughed, one hand coming to stroke your thigh as if to make you stop moving.

Even though you’d partly expected it, you hadn’t been ready for the soft kiss he pressed against your inner thigh. His hand hooked around the side of your panties, dragging them down as he kissed up your skin, and you took in a sharp breath that he wholly and entirely ignored. His movements became more insistent as you squirmed, open-mouth and biting, tongue darting out from between his lips to languidly swipe up your thigh. Finally he reached the junction of your thigh and core, mouth pressing a feather-light kiss that dragged an entirely shameful sound out from your throat.

Zoro pushed your panties all the way off your hips, letting them sit by your knees even as you squirmed to kick them off. “Shh,” he murmured, and you stopped, heart pounding as the sound sunk deep into your bloodstream. The tight knot in your lower belly had only grown tighter, and your breath caught in your throat as you watched Zoro, his eyes flickering all around your exposed core.

He ran a finger along the side of your slit, and you shuddered, watching as he experimentally traced it across your folds. He lowered his head to your hips, pressing a kiss onto your clit. You were barely able to suppress the buck of your hips as Zoro’s hand came to rest on your thigh, pinning you down as his other hand worked along your core.

His finger found your vagina, carefully sinking between your folds as his tongue worked languid circles around your clit. You let out a moan, voice stuttering against your throat as his finger slipped deeper inside you. It only took him a few moments to push another one in, the soft scrape of his cut fingernails eliciting sparks that drew another breathy moan out of you.

“Isn’t it a little—unfair that I’m the only one not wearing anything?” you managed out between breaths, and Zoro stopped his motions, head lifting and eyes glancing up at you from under his lashes. One of his eyebrows arched in question, and his lips were glossy with your fluids, causing your core to squeeze around his fingers. Somehow, he didn’t even seem to notice the motion.

“Oh, that’s what you want to focus on right now?” he murmured, all low and throaty. He always spoke low-pitched, vocal chords all brash and grating from the back of his throat, but his voice hummed even deeper now, although that didn’t seem humanly possible. Your muscles clenched again, and Zoro’s gaze dipped down to where his fingers were still pushed inside of you. He fluidly pressed in deeper, fingers curling inside your body before pulling out and working back in. Your retort was lost as you moaned again, the tight feeling of your gut slowly unwinding as he moved back and forth inside of you.

His mouth lowered to lick at your clit again, and you cried out, barely suppressing a scream as his fingers dug, more insistent, inside of you. He pressed one final kiss against your clit, and then sat back, eyes fixed on working at your core instead. His fingers pumped in and out, steady and fluid. Your breaths came out breathy and broken, climbing closer and closer to your climax until he finally reached the summit inside of you.

“Come,” Zoro whispered, the hand not taking care of you running reassuringly along your thigh. You came suddenly, hips stuttering from where’d they’d lifted off the mattress, a cry ripping out of your throat. Zoro slowly slipped his fingers out of you, rubbing soothing circles into your inner thigh as you ran out your climax. Your breaths evened out, becoming less deep, less frantic; Zoro watched all the while, a glossy shine over his eyes and the faintest of smiles pressed along his lips.

You tilted your gaze down to his face, catching him just as he started to move again. The fingers drenched in your fluids came up to his mouth, and he licked them clean. Your stomach dropped, somehow already turning you on despite having come just mere seconds beforehand.

“My turn,” Zoro said softly, sitting up to start unbuttoning his shirt. You hoisted yourself up, hands skimming along the sheets beside him, uncertain of whether he wanted you to touch. You glimpsed a stiff tent in his pants as he sat up, and swallowed hard, eyeing the pull with apprehension.

“Do you want me to—” you tried gesturing down to his hips, but he caught your hand swiftly, pressing it against the buttons of his shirt. “What do you want?”

“Sex,” Zoro said. Nothing else. You held back the choke that dared to escape your throat, and a sheepish grin crossed his face. It was lopsided, nearly a smirk, if not for the genuine warmth glimmering at his eyes. “Sorry. That was vague.”

“It’s okay,” you assured, stifling a laugh. Your hands worked fastidiously at his buttons. It took far longer than you felt it should’ve, fingers all clumsy as you tugged them through their holes, unlooping them from where it fixed the cloth together. Soon enough, though, Zoro was stripping the last of the fabric off, tossing it carelessly across the room before pulling you into another kiss.

He was sloppier now that you’d come, more comfortable in his element—you could taste the tang of yourself on his lips, and you let out a sigh, hands moving down his figure to work at his belt. He had to stop kissing you to tug at his pants, pushing them down his legs before finally kicking them off fully.

You ducked your head to press a kiss at his navel, eyes tracing the length that jutted out from his hips. Your breath caught, gaze fixed to a pale vein running up the line of his length. “Up,” Zoro murmured, and you glanced up. Zoro pressed a long kiss to your mouth, one hand skimming around your butt to pull you up by the headboard. He ran a hand over your core, as if to ascertain you were relaxed enough for him.

“Do you have anything for it?” he murmured, lips sending chills down your back as he pressed a soft kiss at your jaw.

“I’m on the pill, yeah,” you huffed out, arms winding around his torso. Zoro hummed his response, fingers running up and down your thigh as he adjusted, hips sliding against yours to meet your core.

You sucked in a breath, but he was gentle with it, pushing in slowly, hand running along your lower back and coaxing you still. The sensation sparked tingles all over your body; up your spine, along your hips, down your legs like Zoro was electricity himself. You let out a little sigh as he pushed up to his hilt into you, hips stuttering against his as you both paused for breath. He brushed a ghost of a kiss along your lips. “Okay?” Zoro murmured.

“Perfect,” you answered, arms clutching tighter around him, fingers digging into his back. You hoped it wasn’t too sharp, but considering how big Zoro was, it was likely he barely felt the pressure—the crescents of your fingernails were probably just pinpricks to him.

Zoro started moving, then, his actions soft and fluid at first, fingers pressing reassuring circles into your waist and hips. He was nearly tender with it, motions languid and slow, like he had all the time in the world. Your breaths came out easy, soft and just barely edging towards gasps.

He started thrusting with more insistence soon, though; Zoro’s hips bucked against yours, and your grip tightened along his shoulder blades as he pushed in and out of you. Soft gasps and whines left your throat, in stark contrast to the heavy groans and grunts that barely stuttered past Zoro’s lips.

“Like that,” you said, barely able to let out words of encouragement as he hit your sweet spot, buried deep inside of you. You let out a throaty moan as he moved faster and faster, thrusts becoming harder and more aggressive. You knocked your head back, one of your hands reaching to grab Zoro’s from where it propped him up by your head. He welcomed the invitation quickly, fingers interlacing with yours, coaxing your palm open into a kiss of your hands. His thrusts worked harder than ever, and you stopped chasing the friction, letting your hips buck up against his as he shoved into you.

A low groan erupted from his throat as he hit your spot again, mouth coming down to bite into your shoulder as he suppressed the cry that tore from his mouth. You swallowed, gasping hard for breath as you felt him come inside you, your walls clenching tight around him before you also felt the familiar burst of pressure. You let out a gasping moan, mind buzzing with sparks and tingles. Vaguely, you felt Zoro’s hand against your hip, moving up and down in calming strokes.

It took a moment for you both to recover, coming down from the blissful high after long seconds ticked by. Zoro removed his mouth from your shoulder, carefully prying his jaw off from your skin. He scrutinized the marks he’d left—crescents of teeth, undoubtedly—before lowering his head again to press an apologetic kiss to the bite. You laughed in surprise.

“I can be a gentleman,” Zoro protested lightly, though his words didn’t hold much of a fight as he carefully slid out of you. He did it slowly, inch by inch, leaving a hollow sensation in his wake when he eventually parted from you. “You okay?”

“Lovely,” you answered honestly, eyes grazing up his chest before meeting his. “You?”

“I’m good,” Zoro answered, a vague smile on his lips. It was soft, tender; maybe not as big as ones you’d seen when he was laughing with the crew, but special nonetheless. He studied you for a moment, and you took the opportunity to trace his face with your eyes. His pupils were blown, slowly receding back into small dots of shadow, and his lips were kissed red, swollen over and glossy with your saliva. “Want me to draw a bath?”

“No,” you said, content just to watch him like this. “We can clean up in the morning, it’s getting late.” You hesitated, suddenly uncertain, teeth tugging at your lower lip. “Unless… you want to go?”

Zoro snorted. “No, I think I like it here,” he decided. He sat up, reaching to pull the blankets over your figure so the gooseflesh you hadn’t even noticed on your skin would subside. “Too tired to move, anyway. Might stay here forever.”

“Dramatic ass,” you mumbled, wrapping a hand around his wrist and tugging him closer to you. Zoro obeyed, sliding beside you, one arm moving to wrap around your waist. “Go to sleep, you big dummy.”

Zoro’s breath was light against the shell of your ear. “That was unwarranted.”

“Sleep,” you insisted, and Zoro huffed, reaching the arm that wasn’t around you to the nightstand. He flicked the lantern off, then turned back towards you, finally settling down. His lips pressed a soft kiss along your shoulder, and you smiled, your hand reaching down to meet where his was splayed along your belly.

“Good night,” you whispered.

“Night,” he mumbled back, the end of the word tapering off into a soft, tired breath. You could feel his chest move, up and down in a steady, soft rhythm. You buried your head into the crook of his arm, letting out a contented sigh before finally closing your eyes to drift off to sleep.

© halfvalid 2023

[rninies]

✮ drunken confessions

౨ৎ gojo satoru x reader. fluff, fem!reader, nicknames (princess and sweetheart), mentions of alcohol, drunk reader — wc: 791

notes. my choso fic is never gonna finish (start) because i keep writing for gojo wtf

“toruu.” you slur, arms wrapped around his neck as satoru carry you on his back. your breath smells like alcohol due to you drinking two glasses of wine — you’re a lightweight, but that doesn’t stop you from having fun with your friends. satoru had been called prior to the party, your friends knowing that you would need his help getting back home.

“hm?” satoru hums. “what is it?”

“you have such a cute face,” you confess, your hands clumsily squishing his cheeks — satoru gasps as your cold hands touch his cheeks. “just wanna pinch and kiss your cheeks all day.”

satoru laughs. “really? you think i’m cute?”

“mhm,” you reply, eyes drooping. “you’re the cutest man i have ever met.” instead of replying, satoru stays silent, finally realizing that you had indirectly confessed your feelings for him. “i always look forward to meeting you…”

“i do too, princess.” satoru replies softly. when you don’t respond, he knows you have fallen asleep, finally giving in to your drowsiness. he sighs, smiling to himself — he knows he’ll be teasing you about this tomorrow, and if you don’t remember a single thing from tonight, he will make sure you remember.

you wake up to an intense headache the next morning. groaning, you massage your temples, trying to soothe the pain though it doesn’t help. you don’t remember much about yesterday, only remembering that your friends had asked you to come hang out with them. you remember satoru coming to the club but after that, you don’t remember anything else.

scanning the room, you don’t notice anything out of the ordinary, only a glass of water next to your bedside table with a small sticky note right next to it. you grab the sticky note, reading ‘text me when u wake up plz’ in satoru’s handwriting. confused, you grab your phone and write a quick text to satoru.

in ten minutes, you hear a knock on your door, already expecting it to be satoru. “i’m letting myself in! you don’t mind, do you?” satoru asks, already inside your home without waiting for you to reply.

“you do that every day, you don’t have to ask,” you reply, walking down the stairs. satoru is wearing a white t-shirt with shorts (you can’t help but stare because how can someone wear something so casual but still look so good?). clearing your throat, you avert your eyes. “why did you ask me to text you?” you ask, showing satoru the note he wrote.

“oh,” he sighs. “do you remember anything from last night? anything at all?”

“um, i do remember going to the club with my friends. you were there too… other than that i don’t remember anything else.” you reply. “why?” satoru looks disappointed, and you wonder if you have said something wrong. he suddenly walks up to you before turning you around. “what are you doing?”

satoru suddenly squishes your cheeks from behind, repeating your words from last night. “you have such a cute face. just wanna pinch and kiss your cheeks all day.”

all the memories from last night flooded back into your head, remembering everything that happened between you and satoru. your eyes widen, cheeks turning red. “you-!” you turn your head, eyes meeting satoru.

satoru smiles. “do you remember now?”

“i can’t-” you look away, can’t bring yourself to meet his eyes. “i can’t believe you remember that.”

“i couldn’t sleep last night because you confessed to me and you expect me to forget about it?” satoru asks in disbelief, turning you around so he can see you better. “you’re asking the impossible here, sweetheart.”

“sweet-” you choked on your spit. “what?”

“what?” satoru asks innocently. “am i not allowed to call you that? i thought we were dating now?”

“we- huh?!” you exclaim. “we are?!”

“oh,” satoru takes your hand in his. “would you like to go out with me?” he looks at you, a big smile on his face. you open your mouth to respond but no words come out of your mouth. your mind goes blank when you see satoru’s smile, the only thing in your mind being how cute he is. “if you’re not going to say anything i’m going to assume it’s a yes and you do want to go out with me.”

“was me confessing yesterday not enough?” you blurt out, crossing your arms. “yes, i would like to go out with you, idiot.”

“that’s better.” satoru says, kissing your forehead. “well then!” he claps his hands. “go get ready. i want to take you somewhere today.”

“wha- now?” you ask. satoru nods, pushing you up the stairs. “but-”

“no buts! you agreed to be my girlfriend so you better be prepared for surprise dates!”

taglist: @planetnini @xintre @kyoghurts @sad-darksoul @iminlovewqr0w (send an ask to be added!) <3

[ourdawnishotterthanourday]

Forest Adventures: Exploring New Boundaries [M] — Kim Mingyu

✧ Because who said camping couldn’t be fun?✧

A camping trip is the last thing on your mind when your husband suggests taking you away for the weekend. But when you suddenly find yourself standing in the middle of the forest, it becomes clear that this is Mingyu’s way of cashing in the bet you made. Just one problem – you absolutely hate camping. So, now it is up to Mingyu to show you just how much fun camping with him can be.

✧ Genre: domestic AU; camping AU; SMUT [18+], fluff, established relationship ♥ Pairing: chubby female!reader x husband!mingyu ✧ Word count: 22.7k+ ✦ Warnings: reader is plus-size with big boobs and a big ass!, ass-man!mingyu, sweet hubsand!mingyu, mention of bugs, reader is terrified of bugs/insects/spiders/etc. (i.e. entomophobia), mentions of alcohol/drinking — pls let me know if I missed any :) ✎ Notes: 1) nsfw warnings under the cut! 2) this is a continuation of my other fic, A (W)Hole New Experience, but you can read this as a stand-alone too :) 3) and yes, I totally wrote this because I hate camping myself and thought it would be fun to write about hehe – and because I love a good outdoor fic *cough ‘F*ck My Thighs’* 4) also, the itinerary is at the end of the fic in case you're curious!! ♕ Shout out: special thanks to bestie @forsythe-lll for always supporting my crazy ideas!! and ofc @wonustars for being my nr1 hype-woman for this fic 🤭 also thank you to @gyuswhore and @cheolism for beta-reading this thing for me ^^ and lastly, thank you to the members of @svthub for helping me brainstorm some ideas for this fic 💜 couldn’t have done it without all of these wonderful people!

♡ REBLOGGING AND/OR FEEDBACK WOULD BE VERY MUCH APPRECIATED — DON'T BE A STRANGER PLS ♡

nsfw warnings: big dick!mingyu, soft dom!mingyu, outdoor/public sex, mentions of anal, skinny dipping, spanking, dick sucking, fingering, raw sex (reader is on birth control), squirting, overstimulation, light choking, light food play (pls let me know if I missed any!)

“Let’s have a ramyeon cook-off.”

The words had left your mouth before you could even properly think it through – courtesy of host Yumi and her endless wine refills that you couldn’t seem to escape from. Not that you wanted to, though. It was the expensive kind of wine that left you with a relaxed and cozy feeling after every sip, something you welcomed after a rather stressful and hectic workweek. However, it also made you a little more impulsive than you normally were, hence your response to your husband’s claim that his ramyeon was the best.

“A cook-off? With me? Right now?” Mingyu asked with a raise of his brow, almost as if he was trying to assess whether you’d been serious.

You grinned and leaned back in your seat, fully aware that everyone in the room had stopped whatever they were doing to hear what you had to say.

“Yes. Unless you’re scared to lose.”

“Scared? No way.” Your husband snorted before a mischievous look took over his features. “Bring it on, baby.”

For a split second, the rational voice in the back of your mind tried to remind you of who you were going up against – aka your husband, the person who cooked most of your meals, the person whose cooking skills were out of this world.

The sudden realization caused a tinge of regret to wash over you, but it was already too late to back out.Because Jeonghan, who’d watched the entire thing unfold, saw his chance and took it before you could try to play it off as a joke.

“I hear you two are in need of a kitchen.”

The older man was quick to jump up from his seat to get himself involved in the matter. It was no surprise, really. He loved chaos, drama, and competitions, so a cook-off starring two of his good friends was a perfect combination of everything.

Mingyu nodded, the corners of his mouth slowly forming into a cocky grin that was meant for you. “You heard it right, Hyung. My wife here thinks she can make better ramyeon than me.”

“I don’t only think I can, I know I can,” you retorted as you imagined how satisfying it would be to wipe that damn smirk off his face.

“Ooh damn, Mingyu. You better watch your back,” Sora giggled from beside you, which earned her a playful glare from the man in question.

“I’m not one to back down from a challenge, especially not when my wife is the one challenging me,” he stated, after which he threw a wink in your direction.

The audacity of this man.

Jeonghan smiled triumphantly and clapped his hands. “Great! Then that’s settled. We’ll have a cook-off.”

Yumi, who was just as excited about the prospect of an impromptu contest as her husband, practically sprinted out of the room while yelling, “I’ll go prepare the stuff!”

No one in the room was even slightly fazed by the woman’s sudden outburst. If you’d learned anything about Yumi, it was that she tended to get super excited about things, which – in combination with a little bit of alcohol – usually resulted in her yelling and jumping all over the place. You were just glad Seokmin and Soonyoung weren’t here to egg her on, because you couldn’t afford any distractions right now.

You needed to win this thing and prove your husband wrong once and for all.

“What about the stakes?”

Everyone turned their attention to Wonwoo, who’d been observing the whole thing quietly while sipping his beer. The man had a point though. What was a contest without a reward?

“Right! That’s the best part,” Sora agreed with her husband.

“Good point. Can’t forget about that now, can we?” Jeonghan teased as he turned back to you and Mingyu, a devilish smirk replacing the grin that had been there just a few seconds ago.

“Well? What’s it going to be?” Sora asked impatiently when neither you nor Mingyu spoke up.

“Yeah, baby. What’s it going to be?” your husband taunted with a raise of his brows.

“The loser grants the winner a wish.”

That pulled a chuckle from Mingyu, who was sitting across from you.

“You sure about that? You know you’re gonna lose right? Might want to choose carefully.”

It took everything in you to remain calm and keep a straight face upon hearing those words, but you managed to catch yourself just in time. The last thing you wanted to do was give Mingyu the satisfaction of seeing the effect his words had on you. He was not getting you today.

Instead, you forced a sweet, narrow-eyed smile as you spoke. “Has no one ever told you that bragging results in bad luck? Might want to think twice before you start acting all cocky.”

“Now where’s the fun in that? Besides, you’re hot when you get all worked up.” Mingyu smirked as he leaned closer, your faces only inches apart.

“You’re insufferable, Kim Mingyu!” you huffed before starting to rise from your seat to avoid his heated gaze. Unfortunately, he anticipated your move and pulled you down into his lap before you could voice your disapproval.

“Am I? You screaming my name every night seems to imply something else though,” he mumbled into your ear as he snaked his arms around your waist.

“Yah!” you hissed, feeling both embarrassed and frustrated with Mingyu for revealing such an intimate detail in a room full of your close friends. However, you couldn’t stop your thighs from clenching ever so slightly, something which your ever-observant husband didn’t fail to miss.

“What was that, baby?” he mused, lowering one of his hands to teasingly squeeze the flesh of your denim-clad thigh with his large hand.

Just as you were about to open your mouth, the feeling of something hitting the side of your head interrupted your train of thought.

“Hyung!”

“Ow!” you exclaimed, turning your head to see Jeonghan holding a rolled-up newspaper in his right hand, a murderous expression adorning his face.

“Serves you right! No one wants to see you two tango on my couch!”

“It’s just a little warm-up,” Mingyu grumbled as he let you get up. He followed shortly after.

Sora, who was watching the scene with an amused expression, met your gaze and gave you a thumbs up – her way of letting you know that she’d definitely witnessed the little moment between you and your husband. You just shook your head at her, already knowing that you’d be hearing about it during your next girl’s night.

“Are we doing this thing or not?” Jeonghan’s voice sounded, pulling your attention back to the matter at hand. The cook-off.

“Yes,” you and Mingyu responded in unison.

“Then shake on it and let’s go. We don’t have all night and I’m hungry.” Jeonghan looked at the two of you expectantly.

“Mrs. Kim.” Your husband held out his hand.

“Mr. Kim,” you responded, your eyes locking with his dark brown ones as you shook his hand to seal the deal.

With all the formalities finally out of the way, Jeonghan practically pushed the two of you toward the Yoon family’s spacious kitchen, where Yumi had set up a variety of ingredients, pots, pans, and kitchen utensils for you to use.

As the remaining part of your friends piled into the space to watch the spectacle, Mingyu took that opportunity to steal your attention.

“You really think you can beat me, baby?”

You rolled your eyes in response. “Not this again. I can and I will, Gyu.”

“Getting a little too confident, I see,” he snickered, which earned him a glare in return.

“Look who’s talking, Mr. Bragger.”

“At least I brag and win.”

“You w—”

“Alright! You ready?” Jeonghan interrupted your little squabble before it could take off, and it was probably for the best. You knew your husband well enough to know that this was his way of trying to rile you up in the hope you’d get distracted and start making mistakes. It might have worked before, but you weren’t about to let him get his way today.

“Let’s do this,” you said and gave your husband one final look before taking your place behind the enormous kitchen island.

Thirty minutes later you watched anxiously as Jeonghan collected everyone’s votes.

You’d opted for a rabokki-style dish, which was a mix of Shin ramyun noodles with rice cakes coated in a sweet and spicy sauce, complemented with sausages, fishcakes, and mozzarella cheese to top it off. Mingyu, on the contrary, had gone for a much more simplistic version – Shin ramyun, an egg, mozzarella cheese on top, and some toasted seaweed on the side.

Initially, you’d wanted to go for something basic as well, but then you’d thought about it and decided that with competition as tough as Mingyu, you needed to come up with something fancy if you wanted to have a chance at winning this. But now, as you watched Jeonghan collect the last vote – Wonwoo’s to be precise – you suddenly weren’t so sure if you’d made the right choice.

“Let’s announce the winner!” Yumi jumped excitedly before trying to pull the glass jar from her husband’s hands.

“Careful, honey,” Jeonghan scolded playfully, though he did nothing to stop her from taking the jar.

In the meantime, Mingyu had latched himself onto your side, one of his hands going to your ass as usual.

“Get ready to lose, baby,” he whispered before gently patting your soft buttock.

Your jaw clenched at his taunt, already feeling more than a little annoyed with the man’s overconfidence – it was a trait in your husband you both loved and hated at the same time. At the moment, however, it definitely made him look like a cocky little shit.

“Don’t test me, Gyu.”

You knew he was dying to say something else to get on your nerves, but fortunately, Yumi had just pulled the first piece of paper to call out the first vote.

“Attention everyone! So, the first vote I have here goes to…” te both of you for a second. “Mingyu!”

Your mood instantly soured at that revelation. Of course the first vote had to go to him.

“What was that again, baby?” Your husband squeezed your ass gently, but you refused to look at him because you just knew that he had a big fat smirk on that pretty face of his.

Three more votes to go. You still have a chance, Y/N.

Yumi thrust the glass jar back into Jeonghan’s hands, deciding that it was more convenient to have him hold it while she pulled out the next piece of paper.

“Aaand vote number two goes to…” She smiled before shifting her eyes in your direction, “Y/N!”

“Ha!” you exclaimed, turning your head just in time to spot the look of surprise on Mingyu’s face. “Not so cocky now, huh?”

“That’s just one vote,” he grumbled. It might have been onhe vote, but it was enough to give you a little bit of hope again.

“Next vote,” Yumi announced as she unfolded the third piece of paper. “Goes to… Mingyu!” She shot an apologetic look in your direction.

“Told you,” your husband teased.

You crossed your arms as a frown took over your face. “We could still tie.”

At least, you liked to believe so.

“Alright!” You watched as Yumi took out the final piece of paper and opened it. “The last vote goes to… Mingyu!”

As soon as your husband’s name had left her mouth, Wonwoo and Jeonghan started cheering for their friend, walking up to him to congratulate him while you could only sigh in frustration. Mingyu had won fair and square – you knew that – but you couldn’t help but let that fact make you feel even more disappointed in yourself for losing the bet.

You’d been so confident that today was going to be the day you beat your cocky husband at his own game. But now you just felt stupid for assuming that victory would be yours for once.

“I’m sorry, Y/N. I tried.” Yumi’s lips were formed into a pout as she approached you.

You shook your head, offering her a small smile. “It’s not your fault, Yumi. Thanks for having my back as always though.”

“Not that it makes anything better, but I did actually prefer your dish over Mingyu’s. Unlike a certain someone…” Her eyes drifted in Sora’s direction. Said woman was trying to sneak out of the kitchen in the hope no one would notice, but you and Yumi had caught her right in the act.

“Sora, you traitor!” you called, which made her freeze for a second before she hit you with the puppy face.

“I’m sorry, Y/N! I just wanted to be honest. Please don’t be mad!” she begged.

“Yeah, don’t be so hard on her, baby,” your husband’s voice sounded in your ear, after which you felt his arms wrap around your waist from behind. “I’m just that good.”

Your jaw clenched at his taunt. “How good can it actually be, though? You just made some simple ass ramyeon.”

“Why don’t you have some and tell me before you start doubting me?” Mingyu chuckled and squeezed your side.

“Fine, let’s have it,” you grumbled and leaned forward to pull the pan containing Mingyu’s ramyeon closer so you could have a proper taste. Yumi handed you a pair of chopsticks, which you used to shove a good amount of noodles into your mouth.

“Well?” Jeonghan asked from beside you, which made you realize that everyone had quieted down to listen to your verdict. “Good enough for you to accept your defeat?”

“It’s… decent,” you mumbled after swallowing the bite of food. That was definitely a lie. It was freaking delicious, but you weren’t about to say that out loud and feed your husband’s already huge ego even further.

“Well, it just so happens that the majority of our friends preferred my decent ramyeon over yours, which means you owe me a wish, baby,” Mingyu said before he kissed your cheek.

“Don’t remind me,” you groaned, throwing your head back against his shoulder. “Just tell me what you want already.”

“I’ll keep it a surprise for now. You’ll know when you need to know.”

“I don’t like the sound of that,” you responded, twisting your head to look at him.

Mingyu just grinned, his eyes sparkling with joy as he shrugged. “Hmm, sucks to be you then.”

“I guess it does,” you sighed, wondering just how bad it could actually be.

Little did you know that in only a few weeks’ time, you’d find out just how horrible of a punishment your husband had in store for you.

DAY 1

This was bad. Really bad.

You were pretty sure that you were experiencing a real-life nightmare because you were definitely not standing in this huge ass forest right now – although the sight of your husband’s shit-eating grin told you something completely different, something you’d not at all been prepared for.

Fuck.

“Kim Mingyu, this better be a damn joke or I swear you will be sleeping on the couch for a week.”

“What happened to being excited to go on a trip with me?!” your husband exclaimed with wide eyes, clearly surprised by your sudden threat.

“Exactly! A trip. One where we rent a hotel room or an apartment with a comfy bed and a proper bathroom. Not one where we sleep on the goddamn forest floor!” you nearly cried as your eyes scanned the trees and bushes surrounding the two of you.

The light rustling of leaves here and there sent shivers up your spine as you imagined what kind of terrifying creatures could be hiding in there. You’d never been a fan of bugs, so being here, in the middle of the forest where they were no doubt crawling all over the place, definitely didn’t do your sanity any good.

Mingyu was very much aware of your little phobia. At least, until this moment that’s what you thought. Either he had mysteriously forgotten about it, or this was his way of pulling a prank just to get a reaction out of you. You doubted it was the first option, so you settled on the second one. Because you didn’t want to believe that your sweet husband, the one who always wanted nothing but the best for you, was really this cruel to put you through a full weekend of camping when he was well aware that this was the last thing you wanted to do.

But, upon hearing the words that left his mouth in the next moment, that little bit of hope you had started to crumble right in front of your eyes.

“You lost the bet, baby. And if I recall correctly, we decided that the loser will have to agree with whatever the winner wants,” your husband pointed out as he wrapped a comforting arm around your shoulder.

Your body automatically stilled in response, everything suddenly falling into place. So that’s what this was all about.

That stupid ramyeon contest you had suggested.

Looking back on it now, you just wanted to laugh at yourself for even thinking that you could have stood a chance against the Kim Mingyu. He was the better cook out of the two of you after all – something you should have known with you being his wife – so why did you have to open your big mouth and shoot yourself in the foot with that bet?

You definitely blamed it on the liquid courage of that night. There was just no way you would have suggested such a thing if you had been sober. Sober you knew damn well that no one had ever managed to beat your husband in a cook-off. Those who had tried had failed miserably, so what the hell had possessed you that night? The whole thing had literally been doomed from the start.

It had been nothing but a moment of weakness, and right now, especially right now, you regretted it more than ever.

If you were honest, you had fully expected him to use his win as an opportunity to get you to do a striptease for him – a thing he had been begging for for a few weeks now. It wasn’t like you didn’t want to – because you were more than happy to do it – but you had wanted to save it for a special occasion. Though at this moment, you weren’t even sure whether he was ever going to receive that striptease.Because this? This certainly wasn’t it.

To say that you had been blindsided by his idea of a ‘fun trip’ was still putting it mildly. And the worst part was that you didn’t even have a say in the matter – a deal was a deal and that was that. Besides, you were pretty sure that your husband would never let you live it down if you tried to get out of it. You hadn’t forgotten about that time he made you eat a plate of escargots, all because you had refused to do a week of morning runs with him in the aftermath of another bet you’d lost – you really needed to stop making bets with your husband.

That memory alone was enough to make you think twice about stealing the keys and making a run for the car. Still, that didn’t mean that you couldn’t at least try to convince your husband that it wasn’t too late to change your plans. Yes, that’s how desperate you were.

“I’m aware of the rules we established, but… but you know I hate camping, especially the bugs that come with it. Why would you do this to me? Just why, Mingyu?” you whined, a small pout adorning your lips as you looked at the man beside you.

“Trust me, baby. I’m gonna make it worth your while,” he assured you before gently tapping at your pouty bottom lip. He thought you looked absolutely adorable trying to get out of it. And although he hated to see you upset, he couldn’t help but enjoy it a little bit… maybe a little too much.

“You can make it worth my while by taking me to a nice hotel. Doesn’t that sound much better than this, hmm?”

Mingyu chuckled as he leaned in to kiss your cheek, “You’re not getting out of this,” he whispered, which was followed by a soft whine of defeat from your side. “You gotta try to explore new things. And what better way to do that with me, your husband?”

“I’m pretty open to anything but this. Do you seriously want me to sleep in a tent with you while we’re in the middle of nowhere? There are bugs everywhere! And what about snakes? Have you even thought of that?”

Mingyu playfully rolled his eyes at your dramatic display. “You haven’t even tried, baby,” he stated before his lips morphed into a devious smirk. “Besides, just a few weeks ago you thought you weren’t into anal either, but look at you now. You can’t get enough of my cock in your ass.” He winked and lowered his arms to grab two handfuls of your plump ass.

“Shut up, Gyu,” you whined, trying to wiggle out of his grip. Despite the slim chance of you encountering another human being in the middle of the forest, you still felt at least a little embarrassed about your husband’s sudden show of affection. “That’s totally different and you know it.”

“Is it though? It’s just something unfamiliar right now. But who knows? You might like it more than you think.”

“I hate you,” you groaned, leaning your forehead against his chest as you thought it over. Technically he was right. You had never even given it a shot, so why was it so hard to just suck it up for a few days?

Mingyu laughed and gently put one of his hands underneath your chin to get you to look at him. “No, you don’t. You love me.”

“After today, I’m not so sure anymore,” you mumbled, your lips shaping into yet another dramatic pout.

“At least promise me you’ll try. Please, baby. You owe me that much at least.”

You sighed deeply, still not entirely having convinced yourself. “I don’t know, Gyu.”

“I could always make you another plate of snails,” he teased, pinching your squishy cheeks in between his fingers.

Your eyes widened at the threat, your body tensing up at the same time as you immediately recalled the awful taste of the dish he’d prepared.

“Oh, hell no!” There was no way you were going to relive that shit again.

“Just kidding,” your husband grinned, leaning in to softly peck your lips. “I was actually going to suggest taking you on a proper trip next month.”

That immediately got your attention, the threat he’d just made already long forgotten at the prospect of a more ‘luxurious’ trip in the near future.

“You would?” Mingyu hummed in response, his dark brown orbs sparkling as he looked at you with adoration. “Ugh, I guess I can’t say no to that. It’s not like you’re going to let me leave anyway,” you finally sighed, accepting defeat. The only way you were going to get through this was to accept your fate and try to enjoy it.

“You know me so well, baby.” Your husband smirked triumphantly.

“But if I die out here, I swear to god I will haunt you for the rest of your life,” you warned, jabbing your index finger into his toned chest.

He was quick to catch your finger and lifted it to place a gentle kiss on it. “As if I would ever let anything happen to my queen.”

“You better keep that promise, Kim Mingyu.”

“Trust me, baby. You won’t regret this.”

With your camping adventure now officially confirmed, Mingyu was quick to drag you back to the car, where he opened the trunk to reveal all the stuff he’d been hiding from you up till now. No wonder he’d told you to take a long nap while he went to load up the car.

“So, you really thought of everything, didn’t you?” you mused as your eyes scanned the equipment. Despite everything having been stacked meticulously, you could spot the outlines of a tent, as well as some camping chairs, two sleeping bags, and a crate full of what you guessed were snacks at the top of the huge stack.

“Yep,” Mingyu smirked as he started unloading the overfull car.

“Can’t believe I didn’t see it coming,” you muttered, watching in amazement as your husband pulled various bags, coolers, and boxes out of your shared SUV. “How did you even manage to keep this all a secret?”

“Believe me, it wasn’t easy with you being around the whole time. But then again, I’m just that good, baby,” he said and winked at you before grabbing ahold of another box.

“As if,” you huffed while stepping forward to grab a few bags of your own. If you were going to be here, you might as well make yourself useful while you’re at it. Besides, the sooner you got done unpacking, the sooner you could relax – although you wondered how ‘relaxing’ it could be with all those bugs lurking in the shadows.

Still, you tried to shake off those thoughts as you and Mingyu moved all the stuff to your designated camping spot to set up what would be your camp for the next few days.

It turned out that unpacking wasn’t half as bad as you’d expected it to be. In fact, you found yourself rather enjoying the whole process as time flew by. It was exhausting, sure, but getting to spend quality time with your husband after a few busy weeks made you happy and excited. Plus, with Mingyu constantly cracking jokes, and his cute habit of checking up on you whenever you were doing something out of your comfort zone, it wasn’t very hard to momentarily forget about all the downsides of camping.

After completing about ninety-five percent of the work, Mingyu practically ordered you to make yourself comfortable in one of the large camping chairs – he didn’t have to tell you twice – which is where you were currently sitting with your feet tucked underneath you, happily munching away on some spicy rice cracker snacks while you watched your husband make some final adjustments to the huge tent the two of you had set up together.

You had to give it to him. Despite it being a simple camping trip, Mingyu had made sure that everything was top quality, the tent in particular. It was a beige, pentagon-shaped family tent with a double-sided wall, five screened windows, and a transparent roof, which Mingyu said would be perfect for stargazing – you couldn’t help but agree.

The interior was just as nice as the exterior. It was bright and open – courtesy of the many windows – and definitely large enough to fit another three or four people if necessary. But with it only being you and Mingyu, there was still lots of space left after setting up your two-person sleeping mat with matching sleeping bags and pillows.

The remaining space had been divided into a storage section, containing your luggage, the coolers, and other kitchen and camping supplies, and a ‘relaxation corner’ as your husband called it, which consisted of a small side table and two small but comfortable-looking inflatable bean bags. And if that wasn’t enough, Mingyu had also put up several sets of fairy lights, both in and around the tent, in an attempt to make the entire space feel homier and less tent-looking.

All in all, you weren’t mad at the final result. You had pretty much everything you needed to get you through this weekend.

At least, that was until a sudden thought occurred to you.

“Wait a second,” you started, which immediately gained your husband’s attention, “how could you let me pack my things without giving me a single clue? I didn’t prepare for this camping trip at all! I’m gonna be fucking freezing, Gyu,” you whined, your snack now completely forgotten as you thought about the clothes (or lack thereof) you’d packed in your purple carryon. “You could have at least packed me an extra bag or something.”

“You mean this bag?” Mingyu asked, holding up a large backpack which no doubt contained whatever you hadn’t accounted for.

“I— what? You packed a bag?”

Your husband grinned as he made his way over to where you were sitting. “You didn’t think I’d let you freeze to death, right?”

“Well, no but…”

“I got you, baby,” Mingyu said and crouched down in front of you, placing his hands on the tops of your thighs. “Stop worrying and let me take care of you this weekend, hmm?”

You nodded slowly, covering his hands with your own. “Alright, I guess I can do that.”

“Good.” He smiled and leaned forward to kiss you softly. “Now, how about some dinner?”

“Yes! I’m craving a nice warm meal,” you said and allowed Mingyu to pull you up from the chair. “Oh, and I need to pee. Please tell me we at least have a decent bathroom nearby.”

Please, please, please, don’t tell me I have to—

“Yeah, about that,” your husband began, his expression suddenly turning serious and his eyes avoiding yours at all cost, “I’m afraid you’re gonna have to find a bush somewhere, baby.”

He better be lying.

“Are you serious?” you asked nervously, already feeling your heartbeat increase when your husband didn’t say anything. “Gyu!”

At your desperate cry, his serious façade vanished, now replaced by a devilish grin. “I’m kidding! I’m kidding! Gosh, I should have taken a picture of your face.”

“Mean, mean, mean,” you pouted, glaring at the man in front of you while you poked his sides. “Scaring your wife like that! Just show me where I can goddamn pee.”

“Alright, alright!” he giggled, grabbing ahold of your wrists to stop your tickle attack. “I’ll show you.” He then left your side for a moment to grab a roll of toilet paper before reaching for you once again.

“Come on.”

He ended up guiding you down the path and towards a little house that looked decent enough in your eyes. There were two bathroom stalls, two shower stalls, a couple of sinks, and a big mirror, all of which seemed to be rather clean. At least your husband had made sure to give you that, because you were pretty sure you’d rather pee or shit your pants than crouch down behind a bush to do your business.

“The place is cleaned at least once a week, and we also seem to be the only ones using it this weekend, so we should be good. What do you think?” Mingyu asked, looking at you expectantly.

You nodded and turned to him when you were finished with your inspection. “It’s… good.”

“That’s what I thought.” He smiled and pulled you into his side to kiss your temple. “You think you can handle it from here? I’ll go start on the food.”

“Yeah, I’ll be fine.”

As your husband took his leave, you carefully opened one of the stalls, half-expecting a spider or insect to jump at you. But to your surprise – and much to your relief – the stall was completely void of them, which allowed you to go about your business with some peace of mind.

The absence of creepy crawlers definitely helped you feel slightly more at ease, and for just a moment, you thought that spending a weekend in nature maybe didn’t have to be so bad after all. But that thought was instantly abandoned when a huge spider made its presence known just as you were about to reach for a paper towel to dry your hands.

The scream that left your body could no doubt be heard by anyone in a one-mile radius, but that was the last thing on your mind at that moment. You needed to get the hell out. The paper towel was long forgotten as you made a beeline for the door, running back to the camp as fast as your legs could carry you, all while screaming out your husband’s name.

Said man was immediately on high alert at the sound of your voice echoing through the trees. Add in the look of terror on your face and he was about ready to fight whoever or whatever had caused you to react like this.

“What’s wrong? Talk to me, baby,” Mingyu urged as you ran into his arms, completely out of breath.

“I-In the bathroom… spider… huge,” you panted, not being able to stop a shiver from running through your body at the thought of that thing.

“Wait what? So you’re not hurt?” Mingyu asked, moving you back a little so that he could examine you for injuries.

“No! But I’m traumatized!” you exclaimed with a frantic shake of your head. “There’s no way I’m going back there by myself. No fucking way.”

Mingyu could only laugh as he wrapped you back up into his warm embrace. “How about I go with you then next time? I’ll make the evil monsters go away,” he chuckled, which earned him an arm pinch in return. “Ow!”

“Serves you right,” you huffed, but couldn’t help but crack a small smile. “You didn’t see it just chilling there as if it owned the damn place. The most terrifying thing I’ve seen in my life.”

“Can’t have that now, can we? I’ll make sure to let it know,” Mingyu smirked as he led you over to the little table that had been set up. “But first… food! It’s almost done, so get comfortable.”

“What are we having?” you asked and leaned over to peek at whatever he’d been cooking inside the large pot on the portable stove.

“Just some decent ramyeon,” Mingyu grinned.

You gave him a pointed look at the reference, but he only winked and draped a tea towel over his shoulder before turning his attention back to the stove.

Later that night, you watched Mingyu with envy as he slept soundly beside you. His semi-long dark hair was all over the place, his leg was bent at an odd angle, and his mouth was slightly open, but despite how silly he might have seemed, he looked so calm and peaceful – the complete opposite of you.

Whereas Mingyu had fallen asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow, you just couldn’t seem to fall asleep, no matter how hard you tried. Normally, you didn’t have any problems falling asleep – even in unfamiliar settings – but not even the sound of Mingyu’s soft, comforting snores could help you this time.

You had a feeling it had something to do with having to sleep in a tent that allowed you to hear everything around you. It was like every little sound was amplified, leaving you hyper-aware and very much attuned to your surroundings. From the leaves rustling in the wind to the crickets chirping, and the frogs croaking in the distance, you heard it all… and it was driving you nuts.

Mingyu no doubt had something planned for the both of you, and you feared that if you didn’t manage to get at least a couple of hours in, you wouldn’t be a very fun person to be around for the next twenty-four hours. Your husband didn’t deserve that kind of treatment, especially not when he’d worked so hard to arrange everything for this trip.

Letting out an annoyed sigh, you lazily reached for your phone and tapped the screen to check the time.

2.53 AM. Fuck.

You turned around with some effort and propped yourself up on your elbows, opting to read something on your phone in the hope that would do the trick. But just as you’d selected a kindle, some movement to your right caught your eye.

Right there, stuck to the outside of the tent, was what you confirmed to be a large insect that seemed to be nearly the size of your palm.

Your first instinct was to scream for Mingyu, but you caught yourself before any sound could leave your mouth. Did you really have to wake him for this? It was stupid, honestly. You were aware of that. The thing wasn’t even inside the tent, but still. The fact that it was just there, right beside your head, was enough to tense up your whole body.

Ignoring it was what you should have done, but with your entomophobia, you knew that the voice in the back of your mind wouldn’t allow you to do so. Besides, you were pretty sure that sleep would also be out of the question if you didn’t do something about it.

That’s how you found yourself reaching out for the sleeping man beside you after some consideration.

“M-Mingyu,” you mumbled, nudging your husband while keeping an eye on the ginormous bug that was stuck to the outside of your tent.

“Mingyu, wake up,” you said, this time raising your voice a little as you nudged him again. Only it did exactly nothing. The man remained dead asleep, snoring away without a care in the world and totally oblivious to your state of panic.

It was only when the bug moved that you decided you’d had enough. With a simple flick of your fingers against Mingyu’s forehead, you managed to pull the man from his deep slumber, much to his annoyance.

“Fuck,” your husband groaned as he grabbed onto his forehead in pain. “What the heck was that for? You okay, baby?”

You turned on the flashlight on your phone and aimed it at the side of the tent. “No, I’m not! Look at that thing, it’s huge!”

Your husband took one look at the bug before letting out a tired groan. “It’s on the outside of the tent, nothing to worry about.”

“I don’t give a shit. It’s right beside my head. W-what if it breaks through the tent and crawls inside?” you stuttered, scooting further into Mingyu’s side when the thing suddenly decided to move again – barely an inch, but still.

Your husband decided that was the moment to start laughing, his chest rumbling as the deep sound reverberated through the tent. You, however, didn’t think there was much to laugh about. You were more concerned about the bug that was still there.

“Mingyu, please,” you begged. “It’s not funny!”

“I’m sorry, baby. You’re just too cute.” He chuckled and propped himself up on his elbow before reaching over to deliver a solid blow to the tent wall. The impact caused the whole tent to shake for a few seconds, and when it stabilized again, the bug had disappeared.

You released a breath you didn’t know you’d been holding.

“Better?” Mingyu asked as he laid back down.

You nodded, finally allowing yourself to take your eyes off the tent wall. “Much. Thanks, Gyu.”

“Now try to get some sleep, okay? We have a busy schedule tomorrow.”

“I’m trying, but I can’t,” you groaned, plopping your head down on your pillow.

“Is that so?” You hummed in response, watching as the corners of your husband’s mouth shaped into a bold grin. “You’re in luck then because I know just the way to help you with that.”

You felt panic wash over you at his implication, very much aware that you were in the middle of the forest with nothing but a few layers of tent shielding you from anyone who happened to be in the area.

“Gyu, I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“Why not? I promise I’ll be quick.” He was already out of his sleeping bag and hovering over you, his eyes sparkling with mischief as he waited for your answer.

“Because…” you started, momentarily distracted by the hand that was trying to wiggle underneath your hoodie. Not to mention the lips that had suddenly attached themselves to your neck. “Gyu, we’re in the middle of the forest and this tent is not sound pro— ah!”

Mingyu removed his teeth from your skin, placing a gentle kiss on the mark he’d left before moving his lips toward your ear.

“That’s too bad because I don’t give a fuck,” he whispered, which was followed by his teeth teasingly scraping along the outer shell of your ear.

Oh boy.

Your eyes automatically closed at the action, goosebumps forming all across your skin as your husband gently nibbled on your ear lobe.

Even though you didn’t want to admit it, everything he was doing had the desired effect. Your nipples were hard as rocks and your panties were sticky with arousal from only a few simple touches. As your husband, Mingyu knew your body like the back of his hand, so he obviously knew what buttons to push, and where to touch you to reduce your mind to mush and bring you intense pleasure. But that also meant it was ten times more difficult to say no to him.

“S-still, I don’t think we should,” you stammered, surprised to feel the hand that had originally been trying to get inside your hoodie now inside your underwear, so close to where you wanted him… needed him.

His movements halted for a moment, but at the small whine of protest that followed from you, he felt more than encouraged to continue with whatever he had in store for you.

“You want me to stop?” he asked, watching with a grin as the feeling of his fingers brushing over your swollen clit sent a series of shivers down your body.

Of course you didn’t want him to stop. You wanted him to make you feel good, you wanted him to make you cum all over his fingers, over and over again until you had nothing left to give.

“Do you?” your husband pressed once more when you’d failed to answer his question. He took it a step further this time and used his thumb to gather some slick before rubbing it against your clit in slow circles.

Your mouth clamped shut as you tried to fight the whimper that threatened to escape. You were this close to losing it and Mingyu knew it, which is exactly why you didn’t trust your voice at the moment. So instead of answering his question, you simply shook your head.

“Use your voice, baby. Do you want me to stop?” He dipped two of his fingers into your heat without warning and your first response was to open your legs wider for him. His digits found their destination almost instantly, tips pressing against your gummy walls just the way you liked.

Your will to resist vanished completely with that. You couldn’t take it anymore. You wanted this, right here, right now – tent or not.

“N-no. God no. Don’t fucking stop,” you whined and bucked your hips, eager for some more friction.

Mingyu couldn’t hide his little victory smirk.

“That’s my girl.”

It was fair to say you slept like a baby when he was finally done with you.

DAY 2

The next time you opened your eyes, light was streaming into the tent and Mingyu was nowhere to be seen. His sleeping bag was already neatly folded and stacked on top of his pillow, which told you that he’d probably been up for a little while.

Reaching for your phone, you noted that it was 7.45 AM – way too early for your liking. You would have loved to sleep a bit longer, but you were glad for the little bit of sleep you’d managed to get. Your husband had lived up to his promise, being quick to tire you out with his skillful fingers, after which you went out like a light.

You almost didn’t want to admit it, but the whole idea of anyone being able to catch you in such a compromising position had excited you more than you would have thought.It made you wonder what else your husband had in store for you, and if there was a possibility the two of you could repeat last night’s events.

The sudden sound of leaves crushing, and metal clinking against metal, made you sit right up in the makeshift bed. It was followed by a loud sizzling sound which indicated that someone was cooking.

Leaving the thoughts of your husband’s fingers on your body in the back of your mind, you got up and folded your sleeping bag before putting your small stack right next to the other one. You then shuffled to the front of the tent to step into your shoes and reached down for the big zipper.

“Gyu?” you called as you unzipped the tent, only to be greeted by your husband happily dancing behind the portable stove. “Gyu,” you giggled, walking close enough to touch his arm.

He tensed up for a moment, but when he noticed it was just you, he quickly relaxed.

“Oh! You’re up!” He beamed, taking down the headphones he was wearing.

“You’re awfully cheery this morning,” you chuckled, mimicking the shimmy move you’d seen him do just a moment ago.

Mingyu couldn’t help but smile at your cute imitation.

“How can I not? It’s going to be a beautiful day and I get to spend it with my pretty wife,” he said and pulled you in for a warm hug. You were more than happy to oblige.

“Hmm, I guess so.” Your smile widened as he pressed his soft, plush lips against yours. “What time did you get up anyway?”

“About two hours ago, I think?”

Your eyes widened at the statement. “Two hours ago?!”

“It’s no big deal. I just did some research and made some preparations for today,” your husband assured you.

“I could have helped with that, you know?”

Mingyu shook his head. “No way. I’ve got everything under control, baby. Besides, you looked so adorable sleeping and I wanted you to get some rest.” He smirked. “Speaking of which, did you sleep well?”

“I did. Thanks to you,” you mumbled, a small grin plastered onto your face as you once again recalled last night’s events.

“Glad to be of service,” he snickered and lowered his hand to softly slap your ass. “Now, on to actual business. Breakfast will be ready in a few minutes. There’s already some coffee on the table, so please have some. You’ll need all the energy you can get for today.”

Walking over to the small table, you sat down in one of the chairs and reached for the large thermos bottle.

“And what exactly is it that we’re doing?” you asked while you poured yourself a steaming cup of coffee.

Mingyu took his eyes off the stove to throw a cheeky look your way. “Patience, baby. I’ll show you after breakfast.”

Your eyes narrowed playfully. “Why do I have a feeling you’re having a little too much fun with this?”

“Because I definitely am.”

“Give me strength,” you muttered before carefully sipping on your coffee.

Five minutes later, Mingyu joined you at the table with two bowls of kimchi fried rice. The two of you ate in silence for most of it, just opting to enjoy each other’s company and the sun that was starting to break through the trees.

Mingyu’s cooking skills never failed to amaze you. He could make anything work, even with limited cooking supplies and ingredients available to him. The flavors and textures were always so on point, and this kimchi fried rice was no exception.

You were sad to finish the last bite of the delicious meal, but that feeling was quickly overshadowed by the realization that Mingyu was finally going to tell you what he had planned for the day.

“What’s this?” you asked, observing the large white envelope your husband handed you.

“Open it and find out.”

Mingyu watched expectantly as you peeled the envelope open and pulled out a laminated A4-sized piece of paper.

You gasped, your eyes scanning over the paper titled ‘Camping with Mr. & Mrs. Kim’. Mingyu had made it pretty clear that he wanted to make this trip as comfortable as possible for you, but you’d never expected him to create an entire itinerary to go with it. He’d truly thought of everything, from the layout to the colors to the activities and the time schedules.

When the hell did he have time to come up with all of this?

“Wha— Gyu… You made this?” You traced your fingers over the cute little stars Mingyu had added to the paper.

“You like it?”

“This is amazing! It’s ambitious, for sure… but I can work with this,” you nodded, offering your husband a grin.

He beamed, seemingly relieved with your positive response. “Glad my efforts weren’t for nothing. I know this trip isn’t exactly what you expected, but I hope you’ll like what I have planned for us.”

You released a breathy chuckle and leaned across the table to kiss his lips. “You’re unbelievable.”

“Unbelievably amazing? I know, right? It’s hard to be me sometimes, I’ll tell you that,” he sighed dramatically.

“Don’t push it,” you warned, noting the smug look that had taken over his features. “The trip isn’t over yet.”

“Trust me, baby. You’ll want to go camping again after this.”

You let out a snort. “I doubt it.” You then looked back down at the itinerary, your eyes stopping at the time slot named ‘surprise activity’. “Are you going to tell me what that surprise activity is about though?”

“Nope. It wouldn’t be much of a surprise then, would it?” He winked and moved to get up from his chair, bowl in his hand.

“Oh, come on! Please, Gyu,” you begged, quickly grabbing your own bowl to follow after him, determined to find a way to get him to spill the beans.

At precisely 9 AM, the both of you set off for Mingyu’s scheduled forest hike. How you’d managed to make that happen was a mystery to you.

Between trying to convince your husband to let you in on the surprise, cleaning up the dishes, changing into an appropriate outfit, and being greeted by yet another giant spider that had decided to hide in your shoe, you were certain that you wouldn’t be going anywhere. But of course – Mingyu being Mingyu – he had managed to convince you to put aside your fears for today after lots of sweet kisses and words of encouragement.

So, here you were, trying to conjure up all the positive thoughts you could find to make you forget about the eight-legged creature you encountered earlier this morning, or the fact that the leggings you were currently wearing were just a little too tight around your ass for your liking.

When Mingyu told you that he’d packed you an additional bag with all the necessities you would need for this trip, you’d expected to find an assortment of your favorite items. But instead, you discovered that he’d packed most of the bag exactly to his liking… including several pairs of leggings that you hadn’t worn in forever. It wasn’t like you didn’t like the pieces – or you wouldn’t have bought them – but they did nothing to hide the dips and bumps on your legs and butt, which is why you preferred not to wear them in public.

Although you were aware that Mingyu loved everything about your skin, and that you had absolutely nothing to worry about with the way he praised your body every day, you were still more than a little salty about this sneaky move of his.

“You really couldn’t have chosen a different pair of leggings, huh?” you grumbled after you’d been walking for about fifteen minutes.

“I could have, but these happened to be the first ones I saw.”

“You’re such a liar, Kim Mingyu!” you exclaimed, which was followed by a loud snort. “I haven’t worn these in ages, which is why they were in the back of our closet.”

“Oh, really? Someone must have misplaced them by mistake then, I guess.” He shrugged, a hint of a smile playing on his lips.

You threw him a pointed look, letting him know you thought he was full of shit. “Yeah, that someone being you. I know you too well, mister. You chose them because you like the way my ass looks in them.”

“Well, when you put it like that…,” he peeked down at your ass with a satisfied smirk, “your ass does look amazing, baby, bigger even. I can see every jiggle this way.”

You rolled your eyes, wondering how you’d ended up with such a shameless husband.

“Perv,” you muttered, but still loud enough for Mingyu to hear.

“What was that?” Mingyu ripped his eyes away from your behind to stare at your face in disbelief.

“You heard me,” you dared, noticing the way his eyes darkened at your response.

Oh oh. You knew that look. And it usually meant nothing but trouble… for you.

Mingyu suddenly leaped forward, reaching out both of his hands in an attempt to grab you, but you anticipated the move and were able to jump out of the way, leaving only the feeling of his fingers grazing your bare arm as you took off without another thought.

“Yah! Come back here! You’re gonna regret saying that!”

“You’ll have to come and get me first then!”

You turned around and giggled at the sight of your struggling husband, knowing there was no way he’d be able to chase after you with all the weight he was carrying on his back. Mingyu had insisted on being the one to carry most of the heavy load, which included a few liters of water, food, his camera, and God knows what else he was hiding in his backpack.

“Just because you’re faster now doesn’t mean you’ll always be faster, baby.”

You grinned and waved him off before happily continuing your way, not at all feeling affected by his threat.

“I can’t hear you from over there!”

The rest of the walk was rather peaceful, with you and Mingyu snapping pictures here and there, and him pointing out pretty flowers and blossoming trees every so often. At one point, the two of you even spotted a small family of rabbits huddled together, grazing on some grass and blissfully unaware of you and Mingyu watching them from afar. Upon your request, Mingyu took a few pictures with his camera to commemorate the moment and then you were back on your way, leaving the fluffy creatures to enjoy their mealtime.

Despite nearly having your day ruined by an enormous spider scaring the living shit out of you so early in the morning, you were very glad you’d let Mingyu convince you to tag along. You’d never been a big fan of long hikes in general, but you sure wouldn’t have wanted to miss this for the world – getting to experience the fresh, earthy forest air for the first time in forever, the feeling of the warm sun on your skin as you walked through the beautiful scenery, and most importantly, the quality time you got to spend with your husband.

You’d never seen him as excited as he was now, practically dragging you down the path and stopping at everything that seemed noteworthy, all too eager to tell you about the little forest facts he’d read up on with the biggest smile on his face. That alone was enough to get you just as excited.

It was only when you neared the end of your three-hour hike that you were in dire need of a break. Your legs were starting to cramp, and your shoulders were becoming sore as a result of the small backpack you were carrying, your body not quite used to the additional weight.

With Mingyu being the observant husband he was, he was quick to notice the change in your expression and the way you’d subtly slowed down your pace, which eventually led him to suggest a short and much-needed drink break. The words hadn’t even left his mouth and you’d already dropped your stuff on the brown, leaf-covered forest floor. You then lifted yourself onto a sizable rock and let your legs dangle freely, happy to let your sore feet rest for a few minutes.

“You okay, baby?” Mingyu handed you a bottle of water, which you all too eagerly accepted.

After quickly screwing the cap off, you took a few big gulps of water before you felt good enough to respond.

“Yeah, I am now,” you gasped as you handed the bottle back so that he could drink from it too, “but everything freaking hurts!”

“We’re almost at the lunch spot, though. You’ve been doing well so far.” He placed the bottle down beside you and took his position between your legs, his hands on either side of you, caging you in.

The rock you were sitting on gave you more than enough height for Mingyu to look you in the eye without him having to bend down.

You took that opportunity to roam your eyes over your husband’s impressive physique. The white t-shirt he was wearing did nothing to prevent you from seeing the toned pectoral muscles hidden beneath. Neither did it stop him from showing off his muscular arms, which were glowing as a result of the rays of sunlight shining down on them.

Being this close, you were able to see every little detail. The little hairs and freckles on his forearms, the flex of his muscles as he shifted his weight, and not to mention the prominent veins you loved to see – they ran from his wrists all the way to the crease of his elbows, where they disappeared into his smooth, tan skin.

All those mornings spent at the gym had certainly paid off.

“I do have to admit that I’m enjoying this more than I would have thought.” You smirked, allowing your eyes to trail back to Mingyu’s, which were already glistening with mischief.He grinned triumphantly.

“See? You’re already becoming a camping enthusiast.”

“Hmm, I wouldn’t go that far,” you said, noticing that the distance between the two of you had become smaller during the time you’d been admiring him.

“Maybe you just need a little extra convincing,” he mumbled, leaning forward so that his chest was pressed right against yours, his breath hot against your face.

Though you felt gross and sweaty from the intense walk, and your first instinct was to push Mingyu off your damp form, the hands grabbing onto your ass and his semi-hard dick pressing into your crotch made you want to do the complete opposite.

“Maybe I do,” you whispered, trailing your hands over the front of his shirt and past his shoulders to cup his face. At the same time, Mingyu closed the little bit of distance between you.

Warmth instantly consumed you the moment his lips touched yours, the pain in your joints pushed to the back of your mind as you let yourself get sucked into a haze by the man wedged between your thighs. His plush lips were soft against your own, moving gently, coaxing you to part your lips to let him in for a taste. Mindlessly, you obeyed, a series of tingles washing down your back as you allowed his tongue to slip past your eager lips. You let out a whimper to voice your approval and tightened your legs around his waist to feel him even closer.

From then it was like a switch had turned. What had started as gentle and soft was quickly becoming heated and intoxicating with the way your husband was kissing you – scratch that – devouring you. He was like a starved man scoffing down a meal, almost as if he was afraid that someone would come and snatch it away at any moment. You were all too happy to respond, though, returning his kisses with the same hunger while one of your hands found its way into his black hair.

Mingyu’s own hands had not yet moved from your ass, but you didn’t mind one bit. His large, warm hands covered every bit of your soft flesh – caressing, squeezing, and delivering the occasional slap to pull a needy moan from you.

You welcomed every single touch, every kiss, every shiver that ran through your body as you relished in the heated moment between you and him. Your mind was completely fogged up, his perfect woodsy, sweaty scent invading your nostrils, overwhelming you and making you lose the ability to think clearly for a few blissful moments. At one point, you even stopped caring about the fact that you were still very much in public, dry-humping your very sexy husband on top of a rock, for everyone to see.

A particular hard slap to your backside was what eventually pulled you back to reality. You gasped at the impact, tugging harshly on the thick, black locks you’d gathered between your fingers in a reflex.

This time it was Mingyu’s turn to moan, his lips losing their vigorous rhythm momentarily at your unexpected move.

Your lips curled up into a grin. It wasn’t often that you were able to catch your husband off guard, so you felt extremely satisfied with the reaction you’d managed to pull from him.

But your euphoria was short-lived when Mingyu pulled away, leaving you to chase after his lips like a desperate puppy, eager for more affection. You didn’t want it to stop, and he had not given you the feeling he wanted to either, so you were quite taken aback by the abrupt ending.

“What are you doing?” you whined as you opened your eyes, lightly tugging at the locks again in a futile attempt to reconnect your lips.

Mingyu just chuckled at your pouty expression and gently untangled your fingers from his hair.

“We have a schedule to get to, what else?” He then lifted your fingers to his lips and placed a soft kiss on the digit that carried your wedding band.

“Are you serious? You’d rather go back to the schedule than back to our tent to finish this?”

“And miss out on the rest of the itinerary? No way, baby.”

You looked at him as if he’d grown two heads, wondering who the hell this Mingyu was.

“You can’t tell me you don’t want this. You got me all hot and bothered for nothing,” you groaned.

“Then are you gonna let me fuck you right here, out in the open and for everyone to see?” Mingyu’s eyes went from playful to hungry in the span of a few milliseconds, his tongue coming out to wet his lips as he watched you intensely.

Your mouth opened only to close again as you processed his words, finding it very hard to ignore the nagging ache between your slicked-up thighs with his captivating stare burning right through you. Just a second ago you probably would have said yes to his proposal without another thought – truth be told, you probably would have let him do anything he wanted – but now that the cloud of arousal had already cleared for the most part, and your rational side had taken over once again, you were suddenly very aware of your surroundings… and yourself.

At your stunned expression and your lack of response, Mingyu’s eyes morphed back into their playful state before he threw his head back to let out the loudest laugh yet.

“Don’t look so scared, baby. You can keep your clothes on. I’m just kidding.” He grinned and leaned down to grab the large backpack from the ground, which he swung onto his back with some effort.

“Jerk!” you grumbled, though you also felt slightly relieved at the same time. You weren’t sure whether your poor heart could have handled any more of that sexual tension.

“Were you really kidding though?” you asked carefully after you’d hopped down from the rock to retrieve your own backpack, wondering if he could have been serious after all.

He grabbed your hand and gave it a light squeeze before throwing one of his cheeky smirks your way.

“Guess you’ll have to wait and find out.”

Wait and find out… or whatever that was supposed to mean.

Lunch was relaxing and relatively uneventful. Mingyu had picked out a pretty spot in a large, open field where he laid down a sizable blanket for the two of you to sit on.

Not surprisingly, your husband had prepared a generous spread of food, including a few rice balls, some egg rolls, and a variety of your favorite kimbap, all of which he insisted on feeding you himself. That led to the necessary back and forth, with you arguing that you were “a grown woman and perfectly capable of feeding yourself” and Mingyu claiming that he just wanted to “spoil his pretty wife”. Of course, you had no counter-argument to that – you loved it when he spoiled you.

That’s why you eventually gave in and let him feed you as you sat in between his legs, secretly enjoying every second of the princess treatment.

When you were full and satisfied, Mingyu leaned you back against his broad chest to give you another moment to rest. You took that time to bask in the sunlight, allowing the pleasant warmth of the rays to seep into your body. It was probably the most at peace you’d felt in months – no work, no calls or messages, absolutely nothing to distract you… well, except for your husband, who couldn’t seem to keep his hands off you.

You jumped at a sudden tickling sensation on your arms and opened your eyes in a panic, only to relax when you realized that it was, in fact, not another bug coming to traumatize you but Mingyu, who was lightly running his fingertips over your exposed arms.

Goosebumps erupted all across your body as he traced random patterns into your skin. His fingers very slowly made their way up your arms before eventually moving into your hair, gently massaging your scalp for a few minutes. You were in absolute heaven, completely enthralled by his electric touches in this blissful moment. It felt so good that you even dozed off for a few minutes.

After what felt like way too soon, however, Mingyu nudged you awake to announce your departure for the next item on the itinerary. You were less than thrilled to get up from your comfortable position, but you also knew that you still had quite a bit of a journey ahead, and you didn’t want to disappoint Mingyu by throwing in the towel before you’d done everything on his list.

Much to your disappointment, the so-called ‘surprise activity’ was still very much a surprise. Despite your continuous begging and your obvious attempts to get him to slip up, Mingyu had refused to budge. You wondered what could be so special that he wouldn’t just let you in on the whole thing. Because how many things could you possibly do in a forest?

You’d thought of a few things such as birdwatching and fishing, neither of which sounded particularly exciting to you. Mingyu knew you weren’t a big fan of birds – you still hadn’t forgiven that goddamn pigeon for pooping on your head in the middle of your date – and as far as fishing was concerned, you just didn’t see the point in waiting for some poor fish to take the bait, only to end up throwing it right back where it came from.

No thanks.

With those options eliminated, you had one other potential idea – a scavenger hunt to be precise. You wouldn’t put it past your husband to come up with something as cliché as that. It seemed like he’d done more than enough research for this trip, so the thought didn’t seem too crazy. Besides, you liked games and puzzles, especially when they involved competitive components. And who were you to say no to a little healthy competition between you and your husband?

The man in question currently had his nose buried in a small notebook that he held in his left hand, a map in the other. Mingyu had hardly said a word since you left the lunch location, only speaking when you needed to take a left or a right, which was more than a little frustrating.

If only he would let you look at whatever he’d written down in that little notebook of his. So far, every time you had tried to sneak a peek, he’d caught you and told you off.

“Are you finally going to tell me what this surprise is?” you asked impatiently when he still hadn’t told you after forty minutes of walking.

“Give me a moment, baby. I’m looking for the right spot,” he answered, not taking his eyes off the map in his right hand.

Right spot? Right spot for what exactly?

It took another ten minutes before Mingyu finally stopped walking.

“Okay, this should be it!” he exclaimed excitedly, folding up the map before stuffing it back into his pocket.

You stood in the middle of the forest path you’d been following, taking in the rows of gorgeous oak trees lining it, their vast canopy protecting you from the bright and burning hot sun. It was a pretty sight, for sure… but you also wondered what was so special about this spot in particular.

“So… what exactly am I supposed to see?” you questioned when nothing in particular caught your eye.

“I’ll give you a hint.”

Mingyu then lowered his large backpack to the ground and opened it to pull out several empty Tupperware boxes. You suddenly understood why he’d chosen such a ginormous backpack for your hike – anything smaller wouldn’t have been an option with the amount of stuff he’d brought along.

He handed one of the boxes to you, and you studied it carefully for a few seconds, not quite knowing what to do with it.

Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “I still don’t get it. It’s empty.”

“Yes! And it will be our task to fill it.”

“With…? Leaves? Stones?”

Mingyu chuckled, shaking his head at your incorrect guesses. “Not exactly. We’ll be collecting ingredients for tonight’s dinner. Isn’t that cool?!”

Well, that wasn’t quite what you’d expected.

“Excuse me? You want us to pick some random plants and eat them?”

Your mind was already imagining the worst possible scenario – a one-way trip to the morgue because you’d accidentally eaten something poisonous. That didn’t sound particularly appealing to you.

“You really think I’d propose this without doing the proper research?” He raised the small notebook he’d been studying before giving you a pointed look. “Baby, you should really know me better by now.”

You really should have. Because when he finally showed you the contents of said notebook, you realized just how much time he’d actually taken to look into this. He’d written page after page of detailed notes about where to find what plant, which plants were safe to eat and which ones weren’t, and much more, all with corresponding pictures for easier recognition.

The more Mingyu explained, the more at ease you felt, and the more excited you became at the prospect of making a dish with ingredients you’d collected yourself. It was far from the surprise activity you’d expected, but in all honesty, he couldn’t have chosen better. You and Mingyu boIth loved anything food-related, whether it was cooking or eating, so this was the perfect little activity for the two of you.

“Have I told you I love you already?” you asked when he finished speaking, overcome with a sudden surge of love for your husband.

You honestly didn’t know what you did to deserve someone as caring and thoughtful as Mingyu. He was always so selfless, never asking for much, never taking but always giving to everyone around him. It was one of the things that made you fall in love with him, and now, five years later, you felt like you were falling in love with him all over again with all the emotions welling up inside you.

You loved Mingyu with all your being, that much you knew already – and so did he. But knowing that he’d gone through all this effort just for you, thought about every detail from start to finish, and did it all with a smile on his face, filled you with a sense of awe and admiration for the man that was simply too much for your heart to handle right now.

“You might have, but I don’t mind hearing it again,” he chuckled, wrapping an arm around your waist to pull you close, allowing his scent to envelop you like a warm, comforting hug.

“Well, in that case… I love you Kim Mingyu,” you mumbled with a small smile, and leaned in to briefly press your lips against his as butterflies fluttered around in your stomach.

“I love you too, baby. Very…,” he leaned in for another short kiss, “…much.”

“Thanks, Gyu… for trying to make this experience as fun as possible for me,” you said, your fingers playing with the hem of his t-shirt.

His eyes momentarily softened at your words. “Anything for you, baby.” Then, his lips tugged into a smug grin as he leaned in close again. “But if you’re looking for a way to thank me, I could think of a few things.”

“Way to ruin the moment, Gyu.” You rolled your eyes, jabbing your finger into his toned chest.

“I’m sorry, I couldn’t help it,” he snickered, which let you know just how not sorry he was.

“Just show me where these damn plants are before I change my mind,” you huffed and shoved the empty box into his hands before crossing your arms over your chest.

“Okay, okay! Let’s go pick some plants!”

From then on it was back to serious business. Naturally, Mingyu took the lead and started your hunt for ingredients. The plants you were specifically looking for were Korean wild chives, also referred to as dallae, and ssuk, better known as mugwort. According to Mingyu – and the hundred sources he’d consulted during his preparation – this time of the year was the most ideal for harvesting because the flavors were supposedly at their peak.

Both of you diligently scoured the fields and riverbanks for the two vegetables for a good while before Mingyu spotted the first ingredient – ssuk. He made you study the plant for a few minutes and nearly short-circuited your brain when he flooded you with another batch of facts, which, clearly, you were never going to remember anyway.

Only after that did he let you wander off on your own with your empty box in hand, carefully looking for ssuk plants with young and tender leaves as Mingyu had instructed you – these would apparently bring out the best flavor of the ssukguk he had in mind.

It didn’t take long for you to fill up your container. With the continuous sound of the cicadas roaring in the background, and the calming rustling of the oak trees surrounding you – their leaves clashing and fluttering around from the impact of the breeze – your body had gone into autopilot, hands sorting through dozens of bundles of ssuk, not stopping until you’d found the most perfect-looking ones.

Mingyu came to find you just as you were closing up your container. His own container, just like yours, was filled to the brim with the plant, and you were fairly certain that there would be more than enough ssuk for at least three or four batches of ssukguk.

Your husband took it upon himself to doublecheck your collected batch – for your and his safety – and when he was satisfied with what he’d seen, he bestowed you with sweet praises and then continued to pull you into an unexpected mind-numbing kiss that made every inch of your skin flush hot. The butterflies that had been dormant came back to life, swirling around in your stomach until you felt dizzy and weak in the knees. Your mind felt like it was slowly melting again, gradually succumbing to the irresistible force trying to suck you in. And you weren’t doing anything to stop it from happening.

Mingyu, who was either completely oblivious to your suffering or simply chose not to acknowledge it, pulled away all too soon, once again leaving you with a need for more. The subtle quirk of his lips and the cheeky grin that followed at the sight of your pouty expression told you all you needed to know.

That little shit.

You refused to talk to your husband the entire way to the dallae field, much to his annoyance. It was funny, really, to see him so desperate for your attention while you gave him absolutely nothing. No look, no smile, no reaction at all, which, honestly, was hard enough as it was. But he was the one who wanted to play games, so that’s what he could get. Maybe then he’d stop trying to start something he wasn’t planning on finishing.

It was only when Mingyu dropped to his knees in front of you – very dramatically – and begged for your forgiveness, exclaiming his love for you at the top of his lungs, that you decided he’d been punished enough – you also may or may not have used the opportunity to get one of his famous foot massages out of it. Mingyu didn’t care, though. He was all too happy you were talking to him again, so a foot massage was a minor compromise in his eyes.

With that little hiccup out of the way, you two were back to the task at hand: gathering dallae. The field it was located in was huge and dense with all types of plants and bushes that you didn’t recognize at all. Feeling completely lost, you turned to Mingyu for help, hoping that he could make sense of all the different kinds of flora.

It came as no surprise when he told you that he’d already spotted the second and final ingredient you’d be collecting, nor were you surprised when he excitedly dragged you along to give you another one of his crash courses. You watched him in amazement as he spoke passionately, noticing the way his hair slightly stuck to his forehead from all the hard work he’d been putting in, and the way he cutely scrunched up his nose as he studied the dallae from up close.

It was a sight for sore eyes, which you unfortunately didn't get to enjoy for long as Mingyu reached the end of his short lesson. You were somewhat disappointed because it meant you had to stop ogling your handsome husband, but you accepted a new Tupperware box anyway, forcing yourself to focus on your given task.

Filling up your Tupperware with dallae went much faster than collecting ssuk. After only fifteen minutes of you plucking bundles of fresh green dallae for the jeon you’d be making, you came looking for your husband to show him your inventory. This time, he only praised you after briefly inspecting your container, thinking twice about rewarding you with another one of those breathtaking kisses. It was amusing, watching him try to restrain himself from touching you when that was all he wanted to do.

You were no different, longing for his touch, your body itching to feel his hands back on your skin, grabbing you, squeezing you. But for the sake of the itinerary and your sanity - the latter in particular - you ought it best to steer clear of Mingyu... at least while you were out and about.

That's why you pushed those sinful thoughts to the back of your mind for the time being, although you were fairly certain you'd be revisiting them sooner rather than later.

The hike back to the camp went surprisingly fast, mainly because you’d already walked quite a bit of it during your ingredient hunt, so the final part of the walk wasn’t as bad as you’d expected it to be. That didn’t mean you were any less tired. Your feet were killing you, you were sweating all over and you were pretty sure that if you didn’t get another dose of caffeine soon, you’d fall asleep before even getting a taste of your husband’s ssukguk.

Mingyu, who was able to perfectly read you, already had a steaming cup of coffee waiting for you when you returned from the bathroom, clad in a fresh new outfit that was much more comfortable than the one you’d been wearing during your hike.

“Thanks, Gyu,” you sighed, immediately feeling much better when you finally let the warm, caffeine-filled beverage glide down your throat.

“I could tell you needed that,” Mingyu said while moving over a few big chunks of wood in preparation for the campfire.

“Wait, you brought an axe?” you sputtered, eyes widening slightly when he suddenly pulled the object from a large sports bag.

Mingyu beamed, propping the sharp object against his shoulder like it wasn’t able to slice through his skin with one wrong move.

“Sure did! Isn’t it a beauty?”

“Do you even know how to use it?” you asked, worry etched on your brows as you tried to recall an occasion where you’d seen Mingyu using an axe – there were none.

“Seungcheol Hyung taught me how to use it. He’s a pro at chopping wood, remember?”

Yes, you did remember something about Seungcheol being good at wood chopping, but that didn’t make you feel any less anxious about your husband handling such a dangerous tool.

You nervously bit your lower lip. “Just be careful, okay? I don’t wanna see any chopped-off limbs.”

“I promise.” Mingyu smiled reassuringly. “I’ll be right here so you can watch me. How does that sound?”

“Good, I guess,” you mumbled, still not entirely convinced, but choosing to trust your husband.

It was fair to say that you’d been completely wrong to doubt Mingyu about his wood-chopping skills. While you cleaned the vegetables you’d collected, thoroughly washing them with water and carefully laying them out to dry on a small drying rack, your husband was splitting the wood pieces like a professional, each hit precise and calculated, as if he’d been doing this his whole life.

Distracting… that’s what it was. You found it hard to keep your eyes away from the man, not because you were worried about him accidentally chopping off his fingers, but because he looked like a goddamn snack the whole time. He’d rolled up the sleeves of his white t-shirt, showing off even more of his perfectly sculpted arms. Not that you were complaining, though. You were practically drooling at the sight before you, your own task long forgotten as you ogled the flexing muscles on his veiny arms like a kid in a candy store.

You had to hold back a groan when you noticed the first few beads of sweat starting to roll down the sides of his face, watching with immense focus as they slowly slid down along the curve of his chiseled jaw, his smooth throat, and finally dipped inside the neck of his shirt, leaving the rest up to your imagination.

Your thighs were subconsciously rubbing together, slick beginning to stain your panties as you let your fantasies take over, arousal swirling inside you. Mingyu was none the wiser – at least you hoped so – splitting wood piece after wood piece while you, his wife, were thinking of all the ways in which you wanted him to fuck your pussy raw with his big dick.

“Everything okay there, baby?” Mingyu asked out of nowhere, catching you by surprise. He quickly put down a new wood chunk and raised the axe in the air, muscles pulling and coiling beneath his white t-shirt as he brought down the object with a loud grunt, the sound of which almost made you drop the bundle of dallae you were holding.

“I’m fine,” you squeaked, praying that he hadn’t caught you gawking at him. The last thing you needed was Mingyu teasing you for the rest of the night. “Nearly done here,” you added, your voice much more controlled.

Your husband set down the axe, stretching his hands above his head, which provided you with a tiny sneak peek of his robust abdominal muscles. It took everything in you to tear your eyes away, but you managed – barely, failing to notice the mischievous glint that crept across his features.

“Good, because I’m ready to get this campfire started.”

Setting up a campfire turned out to be a piece of cake for someone as prepared and as handy as Mingyu. It was a win for you, honestly, because you were able to sit back while he did his thing, only handing him the occasional chunk of wood or kindling. And then next thing you know, you had a full-on sputtering, crackling fire blazing, the heat of the flames warming the air while the sounds of dying branches gasping for their last breath filled the camping grounds.

It was a beautiful sight, especially with the sun starting to set and the enchanting, lively greenery surrounding it, and by the time you and Mingyu had finished dinner, it had become even more magnificent. With the sky now fully darkened, and radiant stars lighting it up like tiny snowflakes in the night, the campfire seemed to echo the starlight, its golden glow brightening up the entire area like a luminous supernova.

The two of you were enjoying all of it, cuddled up beside each other, gazing at the beautiful night sky as you lounged on a large blanket that you’d laid out earlier this evening. It was the perfect way to end the action-packed day.

“Psst!” Mingyu suddenly whispered, interrupting the peaceful atmosphere you’d been relishing for the past thirty minutes.

“What?” You lazily turned your head to face your husband, who was no doubt scheming something based on the impish look he gave you.

“Don’t think I didn’t see you ogling me when I was chopping up that wood.”

You quickly averted your eyes at his brazen confession, mentally cursing yourself for having been so obvious.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you finally said, choosing to play dumb.

“Are you sure about that?” You could feel his warm breath hitting your cheek now.

“Very sure,” you breathed, your body tense as you tried to keep your expressions under control.

“Why are you lying to me, baby?”

“I’m not. I— wait, what are you doing?” You frowned, caught off guard when Mingyu suddenly sat up to pull off his dark green hoodie, revealing a black t-shirt that was hugging his body in all the right places.

“Oh, don’t mind me.” He threw you a cheeky grin. “It’s just getting a little hot here with the fire and all.”

You let out a snort. “That’s such a lie, Gyu. You’re doing this on purpose, just admit it.”

“If I admit to that, will you also admit that you were ogling me this afternoon?” he mused.

“I was not ly—” Mingyu raised his brows, challenging you to deny it again. “Okay, fine! I admit it. You were driving me fucking crazy this afternoon. You and your stupid arms, hands, everything!” you groaned, throwing your head back in defeat.

“My hands and arms, huh? Tell me what you were thinking about, baby.”

“It’s embarrassing,” you whined, and attempted to hide your face in his chest, but Mingyu wouldn’t have it.

“Tell me,” he demanded, his voice dropping dangerously low as he grasped your chin, forcing you to look at him.

“Your hands… on my body,” You swallowed thickly under his heated gaze, “and your dick inside me, you fucking me till I can’t walk.”

Mingyu’s gaze darkened even more, his grip on your chin slightly tightening.

“Is that so?” he muttered, to which you gave a little nod. “Then how about we finish what we started this morning so I can do just that?”

“Right h-here?” you stammered.

Mingyu smirked, his eyes twinkling in the light of the campfire. “I don’t see why not.”

“Don’t you think we should go inside the tent?” you whispered, your eyes darting around nervously.

“I’d say fuck the tent. But it’s up to you, baby.”

Right, the choice was up to you. Because if it was up to Mingyu, he would fuck you wherever he pleased, not worried in the slightest about being seen. The only one worried about getting caught was you. But what was the big deal? As far as you could tell, the camping area was completely empty aside from you two, so what was holding you back from going through with it? You weren’t exactly sure either.

Come on, Y/N. Be a little wild for once.

Mingyu, who’d been patiently waiting for your answer, was definitely not expecting you to pounce on him without warning. You pressed against his clothed chest to force him on his back, barely giving him enough time to breathe before your mouth molded with his, kissing him with a startling vigor that left his mind reeling for the first few seconds.

But then his hands were on you, wandering with purpose, skimming under your hoodie in search of your naked skin. Everywhere he touched left a trail of fire in its wake, and every single one of your nerves came to life under his skillful fingers. You struggled to keep up with his lips, the press of his toned body against yours stirring up a storm of desire inside your gut that you weren’t quite prepared for.

Your fingers desperately tugged at the shirt he was wearing, and Mingyu wasted no time to comply with your non-verbal request, briefly disconnecting your lips to take off the clothing piece to reveal his impressive build.

You bit your bottom lip harshly to fight back a groan that threatened to escape, momentarily distracted by the breathtaking sight that was your husband.

Goosebumps formed on his perfect skin as his torso was exposed to the cool night air, drawing your attention to his taut, brown nipples. You let your fingers trail over them, watching with a newfound excitement as he twitched underneath your soft but teasing touches. Mingyu let you, urging you to explore more of him with a demanding groan and a squeeze to your backside.

You did exactly that, shifting your focus from his chest to the prominent lines on his abdomen, which were now even better accentuated by the light coming from the smoldering campfire beside you. Your nails carefully scraped over the well-defined muscles, lightly applying pressure, but not enough to leave behind marks.

Mingyu was a shivering mess by the time you reached the little happy trail below his belly button, his chest heaving, his cock fully hard, and his mind swirling with arousal from your administrations. You’d taken over every inch of his thoughts, slowly fogging up his brain with your magic touch, and his hands were itching to take the lead.

It wasn’t long before Mingyu gave into those impulses, no longer able to fight the impatient demon trying to claw its way out. His hands abruptly halted your movements, and his back lifted off the blanket to work you out of your clothes, not stopping until he’d ripped every single item off your body.

With your clothes now in a pile on the other side of the blanket, he guided you back on top of him with an easy strength, his eyes drinking in every inch of your bare skin, from your full, heavy breasts, to your soft tummy, all the way until he settled at the chubby mound between your plush thighs. It was a sight that made his dick twitch with anticipation.

“God, you are so fucking sexy,” he groaned, grabbing onto the fat of your hips before pulling your bare cunt down onto his very noticeable erection.

You were quick to bring one of your hands up to your mouth, trying to muffle the moan that you weren’t able to hold back in time as your walls clenched reflexively at the new sensation. But Mingyu ripped it away before you could, allowing the sound to resonate into the dark night.

“Don’t hide those pretty sounds.” He gently trailed a finger along the base of your throat, sending a series of shudders down your spine. “I wanna hear you… all of it”.

“Oka— shit!” you whimpered when Mingyu suddenly grabbed a handful of your breast, his fingers applying just the right amount of pain and pleasure as they dug into the squishy flesh.

“That’s more like it.” He grinned as his hand came down on your ass… hard, the sound of his palm hitting your supple skin loud enough to alert anyone in the area.

“Gyu,” you gasped when he did it once again, your hands finding its way into his hair, pulling insistently to express your delight while at the same time pleading for more.

Mingyu slid one of the hands resting on your ass up your back and reached around your neck to pull you in for another toe-curling kiss, pressing your body flush against his as he pushed his tongue past your lips for a second time tonight. The moans vibrating at the back of your throat were swallowed by Mingyu as he deepened the kiss, the hand on your ass continuing to knead and rub your pudgy flesh with the intent to bruise.

You were already too far gone to care, more concerned with the burning ache between your legs. Your hips shamelessly rolled against Mingyu, providing some sweet relief as you rubbed your throbbing clit against his clothed erection, your glossy slick staining his grey sweatpants, and the coil inside you winding tighter and tighter with every drag.

And then suddenly it snapped, the impact that followed striking you like a bolt of lightning, every muscle in your body drawing taut as you released with a muffled cry of your husband’s name, your cunt desperately clenching around nothing. Mingyu was right there to catch you, both of his strong arms wrapping around your waist to steady your convulsing body while his mouth caught your little sounds of pleasure.

“You made such a mess, baby,” Mingyu said as his fingers brushed through your puffy folds, being careful not to bump into your sensitive clit while he assessed the wreckage you’d left behind.

“You’re mostly to blame, though.” You managed to sit up with a little bit of strength, splaying your hands across his chest for support as you offered him a grin.

“Yeah? I made you this wet?” he mused, eyes sparkling with hunger.

“You tend to have that effect on me,” you whispered as you leaned down, your lips brushing against Mingyu’s for a moment before you caught his bottom lip with your teeth, gently nipping at the skin until he was squirming beneath you.

One of your hands wandered between your bodies to palm him softly through the fabric of his sweatpants. You observed your husband’s handsome face closely, noticing the way his brows furrowed and his jaw clenched, followed by a buck of his hips and a series of breathless curses.

Feeling confident, you scooted down further, tugging off his pants along the way, only to discover that he’d gone commando.

You licked your lips at the sight, quickly throwing the stained pair of sweats onto the clothing pile.

“All prepared, huh?”

“For you? Always,” he returned with a wink.

“I see,” you hummed, licking your lips once again as you repositioned yourself between his strong thighs, taking in the bulging veins forking along his aching girth. It drooped hard and heavy against his pelvis, with large beads of pre-cum leaking steadily from his angry, red tip.

Your mouth watered at his sheer size, warm slick continuing to pool between your thighs as you imagined your husband stretching out your walls, molding you into the shape of his cock like he had done so many times already.

“You have such a nice cock,” you sighed, reaching out to wrap your fingers around the base of it, gently sliding him through your fingers a few times before leaning forward to get a taste of the salty substance you’d come to love, your tongue teasingly sliding through his slit as you lapped it all up.

Mingyu was in no state to respond. His breath left him in a sharp hiss at the feeling of your wet muscle teasing his sensitive tip. All conscious thoughts vacated his brain the moment he felt your warm breath fan against the base of his length. One of his large hands fisted into your hair when you began pressing a series of open-mouthed kisses along it, your gaze hot and heavy as you watched his every move from under your thick lashes. It was such a provocative sight that Mingyu had to stop himself from jamming his whole cock down your throat when you finally sucked the head between your luscious lips.

A loud groan sounded from Mingyu’s lips at the sudden wetness that surrounded him. He watched ardently as you took him in, not being able to stop another groan when your tongue started tracing the throbbing veins adorning his length. When he felt his tip press against the back of your throat, he automatically tightened his fist in your hair, his teeth clenching at the terrible things your mouth was doing to his thoughts.

You swallowed greedily, catching your husband by surprise as your throat constricted around him, suffocating his cock to the point where he momentarily lost control of his body. The jerk of his hips that followed forced another inch or two of his length down your throat. You gagged in reflex, placing your hands on his thighs as you abruptly pulled back to cough.

“Fuck,” Mingyu immediately released your hair, “sorry, baby.” His eyes were apologetic, although the sight of the drool spilling from your lips made him want to shove your mouth right back onto his throbbing cock.

“I’m fine,” you gasped, digging your nails into the flesh of his thighs as you lowered yourself again. “You know I can handle it,” you grinned before you wrapped your lips back around him.

Something about your words and the way you hollowed your cheeks as you began to suck him ignited a fire in his gut. Without realizing it, Mingyu had his hand back in your hair, eagerly guiding your head up and down in a steady rhythm, which was occasionally interrupted by you choking and spluttering whenever he tried to force just a little too much of his cock down your throat.

The view forced Mingyu to throw his head back at some point, his eyes clenching shut and his eyes rolling to the back of his skull as a debauched moan escaped from his lips. One more look at you with your mouth stuffed full of his cock and he was positive that he would explode in an instant.

You were thoroughly enjoying yourself, letting your tongue work your husband the way you knew he liked, your hands filling in wherever your mouth couldn’t reach. Your eyes did not leave his face once, wanting to catch every little change in his facial expression, every twitch, every gasp, and every moan. You were utterly delirious with the sounds you pulled from the man between your lips, arousal continuing to drench your inner thighs as you hummed around him in approval.

The moment you felt Mingyu start to tremble, you reluctantly forced yourself to retreat, which resulted in a frustrated and unexpected whine from the man himself. It made you pause for a moment, not because you didn’t like it, but because Mingyu hardly ever whined.

Your mouth had wrecked him good… and you were extremely pleased with that.

“Baby, please,” he rasped, his dick twitching as you released him from your lips with a wet plop. He reached for your face, his fingers trailing down to grasp your jaw as another whine left him.

Your lips quirked as you pulled your head back to escape Mingyu’s wandering fingers. Before he could complain more, though, you quickly moved to straddle his thighs once again, hovering your neglected cunt above his drooling cock.

Then without saying anything else you reached down to grab ahold of him and guided the tip to your entrance. Both of you held your breath as the engorged head slid inside, the stretch it caused sending a pleasant burn through your lower half. You placed your hands on his chest for support while you slowly sank further, your eyes meeting Mingyu’s blown pupils as you felt him throb against your walls.

Mingyu’s hands immediately found their way back to your hips, squeezing the flesh roughly as he tried to stop himself from burying his entire length inside in one go. It was so easy to get lost in the feeling of the warm wetness of your walls surrounding him, and he wanted nothing more than to slam his hips up to feel all of you and get drenched in your slick. But he held back for your sake, letting you go at your own pace, even if it meant he was starting to get slightly lightheaded with the way you were squeezing him so tightly.

“So full, Gyu,” you whimpered when your ass finally met Mingyu’s pelvis, his cock now completely buried inside you, filling you up to the point where you felt like you were going to come undone from just that alone.

“You feel amazing, so warm… and wet,” Mingyu sighed dreamily, his eyes lazily trailing over your voluptuous body before they fixated on your swollen clit, his tongue coming out to lick his lips hungrily.

You were not prepared for what came next. One moment, your husband was taking you in in all your naked glory, and the next one of his thumbs had attached itself to your clit, pressing firmly against the little nub.

“W-wait,” you stammered, arousal licking up your spin at the sudden wave of pleasure. “Oh fuck!” you squeaked when he began to move his digit in slow circles. Your hips began to move on their own accord, allowing your body to take the lead as you tried to chase the blissful feeling.

Pretty soon, your debauched moans resounded through the area as you continuously lifted yourself off Mingyu’s lap before firmly sitting back down, your breasts bouncing heavily with every movement. Mingyu ground into you as you rode him, meeting your hips with his own while his thumb rubbed sloppy figure eights into your clit.

Your face was pointed at the sky, eyes clenched shut and your fingers flexing against Mingyu’s burning skin as you drowned in the euphoric sensation. It was more than you could handle – the slide of him inside you, the finger teasing your throbbing clit – it was too much. And Mingyu could no doubt sense it.

“Cum,” his rough voice ordered, after which he slightly increased the pace of his thumb while his free hand came down harshly on your ass.

Something unraveled inside you and exploded at his demand, your nails digging into his toned chest as your silky walls uncontrollably clamped around his cock. You cried out his name, chanting it like an oath as you were completely thrown over the edge. Mingyu fucked you right through it, never letting up and following your jerky movements with his thumb to watch you spasm and convulse on top of him.

“So fucking pretty when you cum for me,” he rasped, delighting himself in your pathetic whimpers, which he recognized as a sign of you becoming overstimulated.

You shook your head frantically. “I c-can’t… too much,” you gasped, letting your body sag as you attempted to pull your husband’s eager hand away from your abused clit.

Mingyu listened, removing his hand to give you a little relief, but that didn’t mean he was done with you yet. He stilled his hips momentarily to bend his knees slightly and planted his feet firmly onto the ground. Next, he wrapped his iron arms around your back, forcefully pulling you down and pressing you tightly against him, leaving you with no way to move.

Then he was back to fucking you, thrusting up his hips in a toe-curling rhythm, this time chasing his own orgasm. Your walls were still fluttering in the aftermath of your orgasm, your creamy slick gathered at the base of his cock and slowly dripping down to his balls, drenching his skin. It only drove Mingyu to fuck you faster, rougher, deeper as he longed to spill his seed inside your greedy cunt.

You were a crying, moaning mess as you let your husband have his way with you. Fat tears had started to roll down your cheeks from the intense overstimulation he was subjecting you to, and you were almost ashamed to admit that you were loving every second of it.

Your senses were going into overdrive, rapidly clouding your brain with lust as Mingyu’s hips frantically bucked into you, the sound of skin-to-skin slapping loud in your ears. A familiar sensation was quickly building up inside you, pulling tighter and tighter until your body began to tremble, and you felt yourself get thrown over the edge for a third time. Your back arched, and the fingers trapped at your sides curled into tight fists as you felt wave after wave of pleasure crash over you.

Mingyu felt like he was drowning. He was delirious with the feeling of your gushing pussy soaking his cock with every thrust, the hot and sticky essence inviting him to release inside you.

“Gyu, please… please!” Your walls spasmed uncontrollably as they tried to milk Mingyu of his cum. You were more than ready for him to fill you up, and you didn’t care if you sounded pathetic begging for it. You’d happily beg for the rest of your life if it meant being able to experience the feeling of your husband’s warm cum spraying your insides.

Mingyu relished in the sounds of your desperate pleas. They spurred him on to put even more power in his thrusts for this final stretch. He was clinging onto you for dear life, hips frantically rutting into you, and little choked moans escaped from his lips as he felt the tension in his stomach near its peak.

“Shit, shit shit, I’m cumming!” His orgasm hit him in full force at once. His hips jolted erratically before he buried himself deep inside your walls with a loud grunt, filling up your puffy cunt with balmy spurts of cum.

Mingyu shuddered as he slowly felt himself come back to reality. He released the iron grip he had on you and let his eyes flutter open to peer down at your naked form. You were a limp mess against his body, no doubt exhausted and fucked out by the sounds of your heavy breathing. Your face was hidden in his shoulder, but he thought you couldn’t look more beautiful than this, splayed across his chest, covered in a thick sheen of sweat that made your skin glow oh so prettily.

“You okay, baby?”

“Well… that was more intense than I thought it would be.” You released a breathy chuckle against his shoulder, feeling perfectly content like this… in Mingyu’s arms, right where you belonged.

“It was,” Mingyu agreed as he soothingly ran a hand up and down your back. “Probably one of the hottest things we’ve ever done, though.”

You lifted your head, briefly meeting his eyes see him already grinning at you. With all the strength you could muster, you pushed yourself up onto your elbows to get a proper look at his face.

“Agreed.” You chuckled and reached out to remove the sweaty hair from his forehead.

“So…” Mingyu started, letting his hands slide down to your ass to give it a comforting squeeze.

“So…?” you returned, wondering where this was going.

“Now that we’ve almost reached the end of the day… how did I do?” he asked, a sheepish grin adorning his handsome face.

“Not bad at all, I’d say.” His grin quickly dropped at your disappointing response.

“Excuse me? Not bad? That’s all you have to say? Really?”

You failed to hide a smirk, hoping to cover it up with a fake cough.

“Yep.”

He immediately caught on. “Oh, I see how it is, huh? How about I prove myself some more?” You felt his dick come back to life between your walls. “I got way more tricks up my sleeve.”

“Yah! I was just joking, Gyu,” you sputtered, suddenly fearing for your poor nether regions.

But Mingyu didn’t buy it. He had you flipped over in a second, his huge form now hovering over you as a devious look crept across his features.

“Well, I’m not, so gear up, baby.”

DAY 3

Waking up the next day was complete and utter hell. It all started when you decided to ignore the alarm Mingyu had so kindly set for you. And then when you still hadn’t made a move to get up after a first, a second, and a third warning from your husband, he decided that ripping off your sleeping bag and not-so-gently dragging you out of bed was the only way to get you moving.

Yeah, you were not happy with your husband… and that was you putting it lightly.

He did redeem himself a little bit with the steaming coffee and egg-fried rice he had waiting for you when you reluctantly emerged from the tent, but it didn’t take away that you’d missed out on a big chunk of sleep… or that you were currently experiencing the effects of that.

Your nightly activities really did a number on you. Mingyu had stuck to his word – that being fucking you till you were no longer able to walk – and only then, when you were completely spent and stuffed full of his cum in every way possible, he’d let you go.

It was some of the best and most exciting sex you’d had – with you being out in the open and all – and you had absolutely no regrets in that regard, but with you currently feeling the way you did, you just wished Mingyu would have taken that into account and cut you some slack this morning.

But no, there was no time for that. After breakfast and changing into some fresh hiking attire, it was straight back to the schedule. No amount of begging or moaning from your side was going to get Mingyu to divert from the itinerary he’d so carefully planned out. Although you hated his persistent nature at the moment, you also admired that about him. He’d gotten even less sleep than you had, again preparing all the food and whatnot, and he still looked like the happiest and fittest person on earth. How was that even fair?

A small consolation was that the lake hike wasn’t as intense or as long as yesterday’s hike. The path was a lot less rocky and sloping, and combined with the slight drop in humidity and the additional break here and there, it made the walk a lot more bearable.

It also allowed you to conserve most of your strength – or well, the little bit of strength you had left. Your body was still sore from all the activities you’d engaged in – both the scheduled and unscheduled ones – and you were pretty certain you’d need a few days to recover from it all. You were hurting in places you didn’t even know could hurt before today. How people managed to do this for more than two days was beyond you.

Fortunately, you were able to push aside some of your pain when you reached your destination, too mesmerized by the view to register anything else for a few minutes.

The lake looked absolutely ethereal.The dark blues and greens of the lake stood out against the bright greens and browns of the oak and maple trees lining it, giving it a deep hue that was further emphasized by the beaming sunrays hitting the clear water.

Small ripples slowly danced along the sides, softly hitting the lake’s edges with every motion due to the soft breeze wafting through the air. There were no sounds aside from the familiar roaring of the cicadas and the heavy echo of birds chirping in the distance, which created a sense of peace and calm you welcomed with open arms.

It was like a page right out of a nature book, only this was very real, and right in front of your nose.

“This is beautiful,” you breathed, hand placed in Mingyu’s as he guided you closer to the lake.

“It is, isn’t it?” He smiled, taking in every single one of your cute expressions as you reacted to the view. “I thought you might appreciate it.”

“You were correct,” you affirmed, turning your head away from the pretty scene to throw your husband a small smile of appreciation.

The two of you stopped in front of a large oak tree, which put you a good twenty meters away from the water. Mingyu crouched down and placed the ridiculously large backpack onto the grass, moving to open it.

“I also hope you’re hungry because I brought a lot.”

“Another feast?” Your eyes lit up. “Hell yes, I’m starving,” you moaned, raising one of your hands to rub at your empty stomach. You then motioned for him to hand you the red picnic blanket he’d just pulled from the backpack.

Mingyu laughed at your eagerness and placed the object into your hands before reaching inside the backpack again. “Alright. Then let’s set everything up so I can feed you, hmm?”

Your stomach growled loudly in response to his statement.

“Me and my stomach agree,” you said, not able to stop the fit of giggles that followed. Mingyu couldn’t hold it in either, laughing along with you and nearly dropping a couple of the Tupperware boxes he was carrying, which, naturally, sent both of you into another fit of laughter.

Once you’d calmed down enough, you got back to work, quickly arranging all the items Mingyu had brought along on the picnic blanket. And when that was all done, it was finally time for the feast he’d promised you.

Oh boy, some feast it was. You didn’t think he’d be able to top yesterday’s lunch, but you were wrong. Mingyu had truly gone out for your final meal. On top of the ssukguk and dallae jeon leftovers from yesterday’s dinner, there were also servings of tteokbokki and bibimbap, kimchi and pickled cucumbers, chocolate cake and grapes, and a whole bunch of your favorite snacks and drinks.

He wasn’t kidding when he said he’d brought a lot.

“I’m now convinced you’re actually insane,” you said as you gawked at the spread in front of you.

Mingyu, who was seated beside you, reached into the container with the tteokbokki and picked up two pieces with his chopsticks.

“I will take that as a compliment.” He chuckled and brought his hand up to your mouth to offer you a bite.

You gladly opened your mouth, instantly closing your eyes as you savored the sweet and spicy flavors coating the chewy rice cakes.

“How did you even manage to do all of this?” you asked when you’d swallowed, your eyes following Mingyu’s chopsticks as he picked up some cucumbers.

“I’m full of surprises, baby.” He winked, about to raise the chopsticks to his mouth. But before he could have a taste, you quickly cut in and stole his bite. “Hey!”

Serves him right.

“How’s that for a surprise?” Your voice was muffled due to the food in your mouth, but Mingyu heard you loud and clear.

“You’re lucky we’re both hungry,” he grumbled with a shake of his head and reached for the cucumbers once again.

You decided to leave it at that, choosing to take care of your empty stomach rather than tease your husband, the man who had worked so hard to put this food together, the man who wouldn’t let you eat your lunch in peace unless he got to feed you. Unlike yesterday, you had absolutely no problem with that. You happily accepted bite after bite of delicious goodness, now more than ever grateful for your caring husband and his incredible, mouth-watering cooking abilities.

The only downside was that he wouldn’t stop feeding you. Despite your claims of being close to exploding, he refused to believe you. He was like a typical grandma, afraid that you would starve if you didn’t finish everything on your plate. While you appreciated his concern, you told him that you didn’t look forward to puking your guts out because you’d eaten more than you could handle. That eventually got him to back down. Your stomach couldn’t be more relieved.

After that little squabble and a quick cleanup, you went back to enjoying the view that was the shimmering, blue lake. If it were up to you, you’d stay here all day, listening to the calming sounds of the water and the rustling of the trees without a care in the world. But you knew that it was only a matter of time before Mingyu would announce your departure.

“Wanna go for a quick swim?”

Okay, maybe it wasn’t after all.

“A swim?” You briefly glanced at the water and then back at your husband, who was looking at you expectantly. “I didn’t pack a bathing suit, though.”

Mingyu leaned back onto his hands, his dark eyes shamelessly roaming your body.

“Who said anything about needing a bathing suit?” he said, his lips slowly tugging into a smirk.

You raised your brows. “Are you implying what I think you’re implying?”

“And what if I am?” he challenged.

You shook your head and released a snort. “I’d say you’re crazy.”

“Hmm, if I recall correctly, you didn’t have a problem taking off your clothes for me yesterday.”

Right.

“That was different.”

“Oh really? How so?” he mused before popping a grape into his mouth.

“Well… you know. It was jus- because we- it just was, okay?” you stuttered, knowing damn well your argumentation was complete shit.

“Very convincing, baby.” Mingyu snickered. “Just say it if you’re too scared to join me.”

“Yah! Who said anything about being scared?” You glared at the smug look on his face, already feeling your competitive side start to come out at his taunt.

A confused look crossed Mingyu’s face as you abruptly stood up. “Woah, where are you going?”

“What does it look like?” You grabbed onto the hem of your shirt and swiftly pulled it over your head, revealing your black and white sports bra. “I’m going for a swim. Now are you joining or what?”

Mingyu felt his dick kick in his shorts at the provocative look you sent his way.

“Say no more.”

In the next few seconds, clothes were flying as you and Mingyu raced each other. What you had not considered, however, was the fact that your leggings would be a serious obstacle. Whereas Mingyu had no problem yanking his shorts down, you were struggling to take off your final clothing pieces. The tight fabric clung to your legs, putting up a serious fight as you attempted to roll them down.

Meanwhile, Mingyu had just pulled off his underwear and was already sprinting towards the water, leaving you cursing under your breath as you finally managed to tug off the forsaken pair of leggings.

By the time you reached the edge of the lake, Mingyu was already in the water, watching you with twinkling eyes.

“About time, slow poke,” he teased.

You huffed, crouching down to get a feel of the water temperature. “You try wiggling out of a tight pair of leggings before you start calling me names.”

Mingyu slowly moved in closer, his eyes zoning in on the hand submerged in the water. “I’ll pass. I prefer watching you.”

“Of course you d— Gyu!” you squealed, totally ambushed by the hand clasping around your wrist and yanking you forward. You screamed as you lost your balance, landing face-first into the cold, icy water.

Your husband was having the time of his life, his head thrown back and his hand clutching his stomach as he laughed uncontrollably. You emerged a few seconds later, with your hair completely drenched and messed up from your fall.

“I hate you,” you sputtered, shooting daggers at the man in front of you.

“No, you love me.” He pouted, his eyes wide as he grasped your face between his hands.

“Stop giving me those eyes. I can’t believe you just did that.”

He smirked, dropping the puppy act just like that. “I told you I was full of surprises, didn’t I?”

“Little shit,” you hissed as you decided to hit him with a taste of his own medicine.

With a little wiggle, you escaped from his grasp and scooped up a huge handful of water before throwing it right in his face. Then when he was momentarily immobilized, you jumped on him and pushed him under, making sure that every single bit of him was submerged before you loosened your grip.

Mingyu appeared from the water with a loud gasp, his eyes instantly darkening as they settled back on your form.

“Oh, it’s on.”

From that point onward it was a full-on battle between the two of you. The once quiet and peaceful lake district was now filled with your screams and the repeated sounds of water splashing as you aimed for each other. Mingyu wasn’t making it easy for you, using his strength to trap you in his arms at every chance, splattering you with water until you were squirming in his grip.

You were just as ruthless, though, using your knowledge of his body and ticklish spots to lower his guards for the perfect strike. More often than not, it got you a few good splashes in before he regained his composure and the whole thing started all over again. It was easily some of the most fun you’d had in a while.

Currently, you were in the middle of tickling your husband’s underarms, giggling as he writhed underneath your touch, begging for your sweet mercy.

“Okay! Okay! Truce!” he heaved when he’d managed to escape from your clutches.

“Fine.” You chuckled at the sight of his flushed face. “I guess I can cut you some slack.”

“I was doing just fine actually,” he returned, grabbing you by the waist to pull you closer.

You smiled as you hooked your arms behind his neck. “Whatever makes you feel better, Gyu.”

“You’re lucky I love you, baby,” he mumbled, leaning in to nuzzle his nose against yours.

“I sure am,” you agreed, stealing a kiss from his pillowy lips.

“Remember how I said I’m full of surprises?”

“Uhu…”

His hands moved down to your legs, wrapping around your plush thighs as he wrapped them around his waist. “I got one more.”

You shivered at the way his dick brushed against your clit. “What’s that?”

“Why don’t you let me help get out, and I’ll show you?”

“Okay,” you breathed, already liking where this was going.

Mingyu offered you his hands after he’d hoisted himself out of the lake and you took them without hesitation, your gut clenching at the prospect of yet another surprise. He then led you back to the blanket and made you take a seat.

Your skin was covered in little goosebumps as you lowered yourself onto the blanket. The sudden change in temperature combined with the subtle breeze made you feel somewhat chilly, but it wasn’t unpleasant or unbearable in the slightest.

You waited patiently while Mingyu busied himself behind you, making sure to stick to your promise to not sneak a peek until he’d found what he was looking for.

When he finally spoke again, your body was tight with anticipation, and your mind had gone over about a hundred different possible scenarios – nearly all of them involving Mingyu’s large hands on your supple skin.

“I saved the best for last.” He took a seat behind you, his legs stretched out on either side of you. “Close your eyes, baby.”

You felt a jolt deep in the pit of your stomach as you did what he asked.

“Now lean your head back as far as you can.”

Again, you did exactly as he said. You only stopped moving when the back of your head hit what you assumed was his chest.

“Open your mouth.” His voice was low in your left ear, the deep sound sending a tingling sensation all the way down to your throbbing cunt.

Carefully, you parted your lips. A shaky breath left your lips as you awaited his next move. God knows this was Mingyu’s way of getting back at you for teasing him. It was a possibility you had considered, but you didn’t want to believe that your husband would ruin your good vibes by making you eat something disgusting.

The moment of truth arrived when your tongue came in contact with something… bumpy? And was that a hint of sweetness you detected? You resisted the urge to open your eyes. Instead, you slowly moved your tongue as you dared to explore further, now convinced that this was not one of Mingyu’s stupid pranks.

Feeling brave, you bit down, your teeth sinking into the juicy fruit you recognized as a strawberry. Your favorite. A little moan left your lips as you reveled in the flavors of the berry, the mix of sweet and sour prickling your taste buds in all the right places.

Mingyu watched closely as you enjoyed the treat, the fruit coating your succulent lips with sweet red juices. He never would have thought that the sight of you eating a regular strawberry could be such a turn-on, but here he was, hard as a rock and wishing he was that strawberry.

Not being able to control himself, he moved one of his hands to your chin and lowered his head before pressing his hungry lips to yours. His tongue swiped at your bottom lip to get a taste of the sweetness, and then he pulled back swiftly, which drew a needy whine from your throat.

“Good?”

Your eyes opened and you nodded, licking your lips to clean up the remaining strawberry juices. You didn’t miss the way Mingyu’s eyes flickered to your lips, or the sudden sharp intake of breath and the way his dick twitched against your lower back.

“Want another one?” You never nodded faster in your life.

Mingyu chuckled and grabbed another berry, this time allowing you to keep your eyes open as he brought the bright red fruit to your lips. Your eyes didn’t leave each other as you bit down, the sexual tension in the air only increasing with every fleeting second. The whole act made your pussy tingle all over, and you were having a hard time keeping your thoughts sane as Mingyu looked like he was seconds away from devouring you whole.

A couple of drops of strawberry juice escaped your lips as you chewed, trickling down the corners of your mouth and neck before you could realize it. Mingyu was quick to catch some of the droplets gliding down your neck, slowly trailing his index and middle fingers back up along the same path they came from.

You swallowed thickly when he pushed at your bottom lip. Your mouth automatically opened, your lips welcoming his fingers with a gentle suck while your tongue lapped at the juice he’d collected. Mingyu was a gone man as he watched you with a mouth stuffed full of his fingers. The way you were sucking and licking at his digits reminded him of the way you’d gone down on him just yesterday and the way you’d made him see stars with just a few simple touches. He couldn’t wait to return the favor.

Mingyu pulled his fingers from your hot mouth with a wet plop and immediately replaced them with his mouth, his tongue dancing with yours as his hand slid down to your breast. A shudder filled with arousal racked through you when his fingers closed around your stiff peak, softly tugging at it until your hips started to lift off the blanket.

“Easy, baby,” he grunted as he wrapped a strong arm around your middle to hold you down.

“Please, Gyu,” you wailed, grabbing onto the back of his neck to ground yourself.

His other hand dropped to your stomach, where he started to pinch your supple flesh. “Tell me what you need, baby.”

“Your fingers on my pussy.” You were so wet, that you were pretty sure three of his fingers could slide in without any resistance.

“Yeah?” He slid his hand to the inside of your thigh, his fingers caressing the skin for a moment before moving to circle your quivering nub. “Like this?”

“Shit, yes!” you cried, letting yourself fall back against your husband as you bent your knees up to your chest.

“What else?” he mumbled into your ear, his fingers slowing down ever so slightly as he awaited your answer.

You released a frustrated moan, your wide eyes moving to meet Mingyu’s ravenous ones. “Need you to put your fingers inside me and fuck me hard,” you breathed, feeling heat seep into your cheeks.

Mingyu shuddered against you as you spoke so brazenly. His cock was a leaking mess, dripping embarrassing amounts of pre-cum against your soft back as he thought of the ways he could make you come undone with his fingers. It was enough to get him into gear.

You released a high-pitched squeal as Mingyu gave you exactly what you needed. Two of his fingers greedily dipped inside your dripping cunt, curling against your slick walls until he’d found the spot he knew would make you fall apart at the seams.

“That what you wanted, baby?”

“Yes! Fuck, yes!” You shook, your body drenched with heat as you felt yourself already close from just a few rough strokes of his fingers.

“Listen to that sopping cunt.” Mingyu sped up the pace, his fingers hammering into your pussy with a strength that made the tension building up in your gut nearly unbearable.

“S-shit,” you hissed as a hand wrapped around your throat, forcing you to look at the man who was currently knuckle-deep inside your walls.

Mingyu growled as he applied a little pressure. “Cum on my fucking hand.”

And then suddenly you were flying, not able to hold back any longer. A string of curses left your lips as your legs began to tremble like crazy. Your nails desperately clawed at the skin of Mingyu’s neck, needing something to hold on to while the muscles of your vagina violently pulsed against the thick digits that were still pounding inside you.

It was too much, and you weren’t sure your sensitive cunt would be able to keep up in this state. In a feeble effort for mercy, you reached down to push at his strong arm, immediately feeling the way his muscles tightened as you applied some force, his bulging veins taunting you.

“Gyu,” you whined, trying to close your legs around his arm. But he quickly draped his legs over yours and ripped them back apart, his fingers never faltering as they sopped into your pussy.

“Be a good girl and take it,” your husband snarled, leaving you a whimpering mess in his arms.

In an attempt to even the score, you blindly reached behind you to grab onto the cock that had been firmly pressed up against your back this entire time. Your fingers squeezed tightly, sliding up from the base before pressing down on his leaking slit and spreading the gooey pre-cum all over the swollen head.

Mingyu choked on a moan at your unexpected move. The muscles in his abdomen tightened and the fingers locked inside your walls halted momentarily so his brain could register the sudden blissful sensation.

You stifled a giggle, biting down hard on your lip to try and hide your satisfaction.

“You think that’s funny, huh?” Mingyu mused darkly, lightly tightening his grip on your throat.

Oh oh.

You quickly shook your head. “No… no— fuck!”

But it was too late. Mingyu went right back to his brutal pace, pulling moan after moan from your lips while you wiggled in his tight hold. Your hand was weakly rubbing at his cock, your mind way too fogged up from the overstimulation that you could hardly control your limbs. Mingyu didn’t care, though. All he cared about at that moment was your pleasure and making you cum again with his fingers.

It didn’t take long before you reached said ecstasy once more, the pleasure hitting your body like a tidal wave breaking through the shore. A stream of arousal followed with it, gushing out of your cunt and completely drenching your inner thighs and Mingyu’s hand. You tightened your grip on his cock in response, triggering his impending orgasm as he began to shoot rope after rope of hot cum against your back with a sharp hiss.

The both of you laid there for a while, just basking in the warm afterglow of your highs, not saying a single thing as you tried to calm down your racing pulses. It was only when Mingyu’s watch started beeping that he shifted behind you.

“Is it time to go already?”

“I’m afraid so,” He carefully wiggled out from underneath you. “We still have quite some work to do.”

“Ugh, you’re right,” you sighed as you got up too, already dreading having to walk back and pack up.

Before you knew it all evidence of your raunchy sexcapade was gone, and you were back in your hiking gear, ready to make your way back to the camp. Mingyu took your hand inside his large one, giving it a gentle squeeze as he studied you for a moment.

“Ready to go?”

You nodded with a smile, allowing yourself one final look at the lake before you let him pull you along.

“I still can’t believe we did all those obscene things in public, by the way,” you said after a few minutes of walking.

“Oh believe it, baby. We did and it was fucking hot.” Mingyu wiggled his brows.

You laughed at his silliness. “Oh, don’t get me wrong. I liked it more than I thought I would.”

“Yeah? Does that mean we might be doing this camping thing more often?” he asked hopefully.

“Possibly.” You shrugged. “It was a definite no at first, but these few days have kinda made me see things differently.”

“That’s the spir—” Mingyu abruptly stopped talking. You looked at him to see his eyes glued to the top of your head.

“What?” you asked nervously, turning your whole body to face him. “W-why are you looking at me like that?”

A grimace took over his features as he slowly raised his hands. “Okay, baby. Don’t panic, but there’s a little something in your hair.”

Dread filled your body.

“What?! What’s in my hair? Oh my god! Oh my god! Gyu, get it out!” you screamed, feeling like you could cry from the immense fear you were currently experiencing.

It took you at least a whole fifteen minutes to recover from the shock. Only after multiple thorough checks of your body and countless reassurances from Mingyu, were you able to calm down enough to resume your hike back to the camp.

“So…” Mingyu started after another few minutes of walking, “about that next camping trip…”

The terrifying look you threw him told him all he needed to know.

“If you think I want to go camping again after that shit, you’re out of your mind Kim Mingyu!”

Oh well, he tried.

© All rights reserved — ourdawnishotterthanourday // Please do not repost or edit any of my works without my permission!! If you see any of my works outside of this Tumblr, pls report it to me asap. Thank you in advance!

AND THAT’S ANOTHER WRAP!

I’m so glad I managed to finish up this fic and share it with you all!! Hope you enjoyed this next chapter of husband!Mingyu hehe! Would be amazing to hear your thoughts on it 🥹

Feedback/comments/reblogs are highly appreciated!

☀ if you want to be added to my PERMANENT tag list for upcoming works (MAINLY NSFW, SO 18+), leave a comment below or send me an ask, but be sure to mention PERMANENT TAG LIST if you choose to send an ask! If you wish to be removed, also send me an ask!

⚠️ Please note that this is NOT the same tag list as the SEVENTEEN World one!

[snickerdoodlles]

one of my most formative fandom experiences was a comment i had gotten on a fic i wrote for a halloween themed fandom event.

this was for a manga/anime, so the fic was a general ghost story obviously set in Japan. the beginning of it involved a pizza delivery and while writing it, i had spent like 30 minutes just double checking tipping customs and the types of pizza they serve and even fell down a wikipedia rabbit hole looking up the history of pizza in Japan.

now, i just like the research part of writing, i do stuff like this because i have fun doing it. and while i was writing this particular fic, i had laughed at myself for my 30 minutes of googling that amounted to 2.5 offhand lines in a 3500 word fic. i didn't think anyone would care about or even notice those particular details except for me, especially since none of them were relevant to the ghost part of this ghost story.

except, when i had sent this fic to a Japanese friend, the first thing she said to me about it was "OH MY GOD YOU GOT THE PIZZA RIGHT"

and that was the moment when it had really clicked for me. what had just been 30 minutes of effort on my part had become a moment of relief for her. my friend was far more used to reading ethnocentric fic that ranged from unintentional ignorance to outright superiority against part of her culture (the original story's culture no less). and even with the "innocent" ignorance (heavy quotes on that) far outstripping any outright maliciousness, that's still so many people saying her culture was not worth learning about. the pizza in my story was a small detail, but i had cared enough to put in some effort to check it. and for her, coming from a fic experience where her norm was bracing for hundreds of inaccuracies born of ignorance, especially at that time after a flood of stories centered around "Halloween as a cultural holiday in the US" premises instead of the "Halloween is a commercial gimmick in Japan" reality, seeing someone put in some effort even for minor story details meant something to her.

this also throws me back to the discourse that arose in a french show fandom a few years ago because there were a lot of fic authors that wrote 'dollars' instead of 'euros'-- but when people brought this up as a prevalent issue across the fandom but an easy one to fic/watch out for, many of these writers instead pushed back to complain that they were posting stories for free and it wasn't that big of a deal. which really upset a lot of people, but then this upset was met with a new wave of indignation that people needed to 'get over it' because they're writing fic ~just as a hobby~. but, even if 'dollars' instead of 'euros' wasn't a big deal, by digging in their heels about the issue, they were saying "your culture isn't worth even five minutes of my time or effort."

I've been thinking about these things lately because the ethnocentrism in Thai drama fandoms is...staggering. just over the turn of the year, there were waves of Christmas fic for Buddhist characters. and just. Christmas in Thailand is a tourist thing at best. sometimes a pop culture gimmick for international audiences or maybe an offhand high school thing to blow off steam between midterms. it's not a cultural thing. and even if a character is a part of the Christian minority, a Christian Thai's holiday customs and culture are going to be vastly different than a Christian's customs in the Americas or Europe. and while the Christmas fic is at least finished for now, I'm already bracing myself for the Easter fic wave that also seems to pop up for Thai dramas. it's so frustrating to see this sort of cultural overwrite all the time, especially since most Thai drama holiday works aren't about Thai holidays.

but the thing that really got me bristling about all of this again was i saw a post the other day where op said that they weren't going to write [thai drama] fic because they don't know much about thailand.

what an absolutely appalling statement to make.

google is right there. wikipedia is free. you don't even have to leave tumblr or AO3 to learn more because there are Thai natives in fandom who write essays to explain common elements of their culture. hell, even just watching these Thai stories and considering the values and messages imparted by the narrative framework and story lens tells you something about that culture. the audacity to look at a culture different from your own and say "this is not worth my effort or time to learn anything more about," are you kidding me?!?

the messages and values of a story tell you about the writer's values, which are going to carry their cultural values, beliefs, and biases. Thai culture is going to be heavily relevant to any Thai story, even the ones that aren't explicitly about Thai culture/customs/etc. (hell, Thai bl/gl as a genre alone-- just the fact that queer Thai writers are making these stories in Thailand's current political climate is highly political, even the "fluffy" ones that don't seem to make outright political statements.) to approach any story like it was made in a vacuum is to remove the writer(s)' culture and values and to overwrite them with your own.

especially because this is fandom. these are the lowest stakes to learn! it sucks to see people say things like "but i'm scared i'll get something wrong" and hold up that fear as a shield to justify their ignorance. no one's expecting anyone to get every detail right, especially not for a culture that isn't theirs, just make an effort to learn something new about it. pick out something that caught your eye as different to learn more about and see where it leads you.

and for the record--making a mistake trying to broaden your horizons is a far, far better thing to do than to superimpose your culture on everyone else's because you're scared to confront your ignorance.

edit: check out this reblog thanks

[sunnitheapollokid]

✴️ ┊ ༑ ࿐ྂ。GO ON AND PUT THAT RING ON MY FINGER!

how the heroes of olympus would react to you accidentally calling them “husband”! <3

characters in this thread : leo valdez, percy jackson, jason grace, frank zhang.

📬 sunni’s notes : hey sunni nation school is biting me in the ass but i am thriving (barely) ANYWAAAY i was thinking of some fic ideas and this had crossed my mind and thought it would be fun!! lowkey breaking my silence because i haven’t gone far enough to write about our boy frank so if he’s a little out of character then i apologize </3 okay happy reading bebis! sunkisses!!! >3<

ʚ PERCY JACKSON ɞ . . .

⊹ you and percy spent christmas break at sally’s apartment!

⊹ it was a snowy new york city day, and y’all decided to stay in and just bake some cookies with his mom, while paul was out for work.

⊹ “hell yeah!! cookies!!” percy yelled, grabbing the ingredients from the apartment pantry, a bag of flour, sugar, and white chocolate chips in his arms.

⊹ sally clapped her hands, “(name), honey, grab the powdered sugar please?” you nodded, on your way to the pantry.

⊹ you scanned the small room, percy walking beside you, his hands on his hips. he hit your hips with his own sassily, “come on babe, it’s right there.” he teased.

⊹ rolling your eyes you reply,

⊹ “hubba, i’m trying—“ you cut yourself off. “i.. i mean— ah.. i-“

⊹ percy, silent for a bit, burst into laughter, holding his stomach.

⊹ your cheeks growing a shade of pink, he helf you by the waist and peppered you with wet kisses. “awww, my dear ‘ol wife!” he said in a posh-accent.

⊹ you tried to get out of his embrace, but he kept his grip, “perce! stop!!” you laughed with him, percy continued his kisses before you two got scolded at by sally.

⊹ “love birds! hurry with the powdered sugar!”

⊹ before leaving back for school, percy asked his mom for engagement ring ideas.

⊹ this man did not want to waste time.

ʚ LEO VALDEZ ɞ . . .

⊹ spending your time back in leo’s cabin, everybody was gone for the end of summer break, and leo was the only one left back at the heph cabin.

⊹ you laid on his bed while he worked on a few projects, tossing a piece of metal in the air and catching it, letting it keep you distracted.

⊹ leo hummed, “mami, you okay?” he kept his eyes glued to the small machine infront of him.

⊹ you hummed back, “yeah. i’m peachy hubba.”

⊹ your eyes widen.

⊹ his eyes widen.

⊹ “wh.. whAT’D YOU SAY??” leo jumped, his goggles falling from his face.

⊹ “I MEANT BUBBA! NOT HUBBA!”

⊹ despite your efforts in justifying the accidental nickname, leo had twinkles in his eyes.

⊹ “i definitely heard you call me your husband.” he leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms.

⊹ you folded i’m afraid.

⊹ “when did we have a wedding? i’m sure i’d remember you in white mami.”

⊹ gods, the wink. he gave you a wink.

⊹ HE DEFINITELY FLEXED IT AT THE SEVENS GANG.

⊹ “oh, i don’t know about you guys but i’m pretty sure (name) just called me her husband.”

⊹ “oh shut up you already told us that.”

ʚ JASON GRACE ɞ . . .

⊹ sunny day out!

⊹ y’all were out in new york for a totally normal mortal date, which you guys think you deserved by the way.

⊹ you guys we’re just out window shopping and coo’ing at old dogs that their owners had walked them out for, your hands interwined.

⊹ jason always caught a glimpse of your beaming smile whenever you waved at a dog passing by.

⊹ “where do you wanna go next honey?” he spoke softly, continuing your walking.

⊹ “mm.. coffee shop?”

⊹ the blondie shrugging his shoulders, mirroring the same grin his girlfriend had, he nodded.

⊹ excited to get some coffee, you don’t truly realize your choice of words,

⊹ “thanks hubba!—“

⊹ at first, jason and you don’t really realize it since at this point, you two we’re a married couple by the way you act.

⊹ the intimacy and the pure comfort of you guys.

⊹ from the rest of the sevens point of few, you two we’re like parents to them.

⊹ but he brings it up the minute you guys inhale the aroma of fresh brewed coffee.

⊹ “hubba?” he said in-between soft chuckles, a pink blush growing on his face as his nervousness starts to creep up his spine.

⊹ she grinned, “you like it?”

⊹ “love it.” and he kissed your cheek longingly.

ʚ FRANK ZHANG ɞ . . .

⊹ frank tackled you gently into a bear hug.

⊹ the poor boy was training until sunrise.

⊹ you giggled under your breath as he basically enveloped you in his embrace.

⊹ “you sleepy, baby?” you whispered, the giggles unable to be kept.

⊹ frank nodded while he nuzzled his face in your shoulder, just savoring the moment you guys we’re having together under the sunrise of camp.

⊹ “just sleep hubba.” you slipped out, but frank was unable to overhear. though, he truly, truly, did overhear.

⊹ he was too tired to react, keeping his face in your shoulder, but he let out a hum, a faint smile on his face.

⊹ “thank you love.”

⊹ “anything for you.”

⊹ though the moment he woke up, unsure to bring it up, he came up to you,

⊹ “you uh.. called me something, when i fell asleep.”

⊹ you cocked a brow, confused, then it hit you.

⊹ “OH! sorry— force of habit.” you grinned.

⊹ frank melted at your gaze, kissing your forehead, “maybe we should make it a normal habit.”

[toruro]

— ✧ the letter

i hope one word, one letter, will laugh and cry with you (the letter / ateez)

pairing. xu minghao x reader

description. in which you’re jun's little sister and have been pining for a man so close yet so out of reach for ages. now, years later, when you see minghao all grown up, famous, and still making your heart flutter, you're not so sure what to do about your not-so-little crush.

genres. slowburn, fluff, angst, childhood f2l

tags. idol!au, alcohol consumption & underage drinking, lots of arguments, Lots of pent up emotions oops, miscommunication, sorta hot headed reader, minghao is minghao and that is a warning enough

fic playlist.

w/c. 26k

a/n. the smut has been moved to a separate post which can be found here! i had so so so much fun writing this! huge thanks to @gyuswhore bc em literally helped me through every step of the way & sat through me planning & switching around the events of the story a bajillion times, and thank u to @honeyhypen who read over this for me ^-^

ENVELOPE

To: Xu Minghao

“Why are you in my room?” Jun huffs, turning around to look up at you as you stand by his door. In front of him is a massive, yet unfinished LEGO replica of Hogwarts. You frown, glancing at his friend who lays on his bed with a phone up to his face.

He’s Jun’s new friend, and you’ve heard your brother talk about him but this is your first time really seeing Minghao in the flesh. Shaggy hair hangs loose over his dark eyes as he peeks over his phone and glances at Jun, as if to silently ask who you are.

“Dad says dinner is ready,” you tell him, feeling a little timid under the gaze of the new boy. He’s only two years older than you, but the only interaction you get with high schoolers is your brother, so you’re feeling shy. He’s a very nice looking boy, you think to yourself, but try hard not to stare as Minghao uncrosses his legs and sits up on your brother's bed.

Jun’s eyes soften when he notices you standing awkwardly, standing up and pointing at you as he says your name. “My sister—two years younger,” he explains.

“One point five, actually,” you correct him with a roll of your eyes, feeling more comfortable now that Jun is initiating something. Your brother laughs at you and ruffles your hair while Minghao stands up behind him.

“Ya-da, ya-da. You’re still two grades below, so it doesn’t really make a difference. Anyways, this is Minghao,” he says, pointing at his friend behind him who throws you a small smile and wave.

“I know,” you blurt out before you even have a chance to think, heat flushing to your face after you realize what you said and see Minghao give you a funny look. “I-I mean because Jun talks about you a lot,” you clarify, clearing your throat. “Y’know, he doesn’t have a lot of friends so when—”

Jun clamps a hand over your mouth and gently drags you out of the room as Minghao follows behind closely with silent laughter. “That’s enough from you. Watch it, or I’m never letting you talk to my friends again.”

“Friends? I think you mean friend,” you retort, looking back at Minghao who watches the two of you amusedly. “Are you sure you want to be friends with someone so mean to his sist—”

Jun flicks your forehead and you push his chest. “Shut up already! If you scare away all my friends, all I’ll have left is you, and you’ll just have to put up with me all day!”

“You’re right about that,” you say with a heavy sigh as you all make your way to the dinner table where your father has set out a meal for the three of you. Putting your hands up in defeat as you sit down at your spot at the middle end of the table, you glance at Minghao who takes a seat with Jun sitting between the two of you. “I guess I’ll back off for now.”

Jun scoffs. “You better.” The three of you laugh together.

Yiren rummages through your closet, and you frown deeply. “Hey! You better clean that up,” you warn, rolling off of your bed and onto the floor, lazily standing up.

“I’m helping you pick out a nice outfit! You said Minghao is coming ri—” You scramble to your feet to slap a hand over Yiren’s mouth, eyes wide.

“Shut up! My brother’s room is right there—he might hear you!”

Yiren rolls her eyes, nudging your hand off her mouth with a huff. “Oh my god, don’t tell me you haven’t told him yet.”

“What?” you narrow your eyes at her, grabbing one of your bras that she threw onto the ground and stuffing it back into your closet. “You thought I was going to tell Jun that I have a crush on his best friend?” you half whisper, half yell.

“Uh, why wouldn’t you? You’re seriously missing out on your chance to have him help you get with Minghao.”

You scoff, looking down at all the clothes strewn across the floor. “Have you met my brother? He would flip if I even mentioned being with a guy, let alone that guy being two years older and his friend.”

“You don’t know that,” Yiren retorts, throwing herself onto your bed leaving you to clean up the mess she made.

“Yes I do. This is how I can tell you don’t have any brothers …”

“Well if you never make a move on Minghao, how are you ever going to get him? You gotta start somewhere, and maybe your brother is the first nut you gotta crack to get there.”

“If you haven’t noticed, I haven’t exactly planned on making any moves,” you mumble, reaching down to pick up a cute pink jacket you haven’t seen in a while.

“Uh, why not?” Yiren piques, sitting upright on your mattress.

“Excuse me, have you looked at Minghao?” you groan, slumping against your wall with the jacket in your hands. “He’s so … cool, and popular, and handsome,” you gush, and Yiren makes a disgusted face.

“Uh, no, sorry I don’t fawn over your future husband, so I don’t really look at Minghao but—”

“And he’s going to be a senior! Why would a senior ever go for—” you look down and gesture at yourself, “—me.”

“You’re seriously downgrading yourself—you know you’re a catch.”

“Yeah, not for someone like him,” you snort, flopping down onto your bed next to her. “It’s whatever, it’s a stupid crush anyways.”

“Yeah,” Yiren says flatly. “You’ve only been crushing on him for like three years—hey! Don’t hit me!”

“Then stop saying this stuff,” you groan, throwing a pillow onto her head.

“Okay fine, I’ll stop. So are you going to wear that?” she asks, pointing at the jacket you left at the foot of your bed.

“Yeah, I think I will. It’s cute right?”

“Mhm … bet Minghao will totally like it and—”

“Yiren, shut up,” you giggle, pushing her again as you roll off the bed. “Okay, so the pink jacket and these jeans?” you ask, picking one pair off the ground and holding it up for her to see.

“Mm, no,” she says while shaking her head, standing up to join you as she looks at all of the clothes she threw across the floor. “Let’s see …” she hums to herself.

“Yiren,” you say with a laugh, “I think you’re putting more thought into this than me.”

“Well I can’t just let my best friend be single and lonely for the rest of her life! If all you do is sit around and listen to Radiohead, you’re going to end up being sixty-five and alone in some cottage in the woods.”

“Hey! That actually seems pretty peaceful,” you try to object, but Yiren narrows her eyes in your direction.

“Okay well,” she drawls out, putting her hands on your shoulders so you’re right in front of her, “Imagine being sixty-five and living in a cute cottage in the woods with Minghao. Sounds better, doesn’t it?” You can’t help the giddy grin that makes its way onto your face when Yiren says that, and she punches your shoulder lightly when she notices. “See, you do want that! So just listen to me, okay?”

“Okay, okay, fine! Just tell me which jeans to wear.”

She looks down, picking through the denim before pulling out a light blue one with little flowers embroidered on the pockets. “Look, this is cute. It’ll match with the jacket.”

You nod along, not questioning her because as far as you know, Yiren’s fashionable instinct stretches much further than yours and whatever she says about this must be true. As you change from your pajamas  into your new, curated outfit, Yiren sits back on the bed and grins widely.

“Looks perfect on you. Minghao will love it.”

“You think?” you pique, looking at her with bright, beaming eyes.

She winks at you and you jump up and down on the balls of your feet at the excitement. “I want at least 25% of whatever you get from your wedding gifts. You both will owe me big time.”

“I’ll believe it when it happens … Anyways, you ready to go? Let’s wait downstairs and get some pop while we wait for Minghao to come,” you suggest, Yiren agreeing with a nod as she bounces behind you. Jun, it seems, is still in his room waiting for his friend, so you stick your head through his door. “We’re going down to snack a little. Wanna come?”

Your brother shrugs, pushing himself off his swiveling chair to join you. “You know if we still have those cupcakes? The ones you made last week?”

“I think we have a few left. Why? You liked them?” you exclaim happily, turning around to face Jun as the three of you settle in the kitchen. You reach for a box you kept on the island, popping off the lid to show him.

Jun grins and pulls one out and you offer one to Yiren who stands beside you. “‘course I like them,” he says with his mouth stuffed with cake and cream.

Yiren, shooting a look of disgust his way, says, “Ew! Please don’t chew and talk, that’s gross.” Jun rolls his eyes at her as Yiren stuffs her own face with the cupcake, sighing as she digs in.

“Whatever,” Jun grumbles after swallowing it down. “They taste really good, you should make them more.”

Yiren nods, tapping your shoulder, “Agreed. Send me the recipe too,” voice muffled as she continues to munch down on the cupcake.

“Didn’t you just tell me not to eat with my mouth full?” Jun mutters, crossing his hands over his chest. You laugh at the banter and suddenly you hear the doorbell ring, ears perking up. “That’s probably Minghao—I’ll get the door.”

As your brother makes his way down to the foyer, you turn to look at Yiren. “I would give you the recipe but I don’t want to be the reason your house burns down. Seriously, remember the last time you tried baking and—”

“Oh my god, is the recipe what you’re thinking about right now? Minghao is just about to come—offer him a cupcake! Show him your amazing baking skills and show him what a good housewife you can be!”

You give your best friend a look of bewilderment. “What the hell Yiren,” you groan, slapping your hand on your face, trying to hold back your chuckles. “Okay, I’ll give it to him but only because I want him to be impressed. Not because I want to submit myself to misogyny for the sake of a man.”

“Okay fine but—look!” she exclaims in a hushed whisper. “He’s here!” You immediately straighten your back and smile when Jun walks back into the kitchen with Minghao. He’s wearing some loose jeans and a black hoodie, his hair longer than before.

He says your name when he sees you, throwing up a wave and a smile. Minghao then glances at Yiren with a blank stare, pursing his lips together. Yiren chuckles nervously and clicks her tongue while pointing at herself. “Yiren.”

“Ah. Hi Yiren,” he says politely.

“You guys want some pop?” Jun offers when he opens up the fridge. Yiren, Minghao, and you nod happily and respectively call out your choices.

“Sprite!”

“Cola!”

“Cola!”

Jun juts his lip out in a pout when he turns back to the three of you. “I wanted Cola too, but there’s only two left.” You’re about to furrow your brows and tell him that it’s okay, you don’t really want any, but Minghao speaks up before you.

“She can have the Cola, I don’t mind,” he says casually, grabbing one can from Jun and handing it to you with soft eyes. “Here.”

“Are you sure? I don’t really care for the difference between Sprite and Cola and—”

Minghao chuckles and shakes his head, and you think you might just pass out when your palm brushes against his knuckles when he eases the cold can into your hand. “Seriously, it’s fine,” he tells you. You glance at Jun and Yiren who are busy opening their own cans, turning your attention back to Minghao.

“Thank you … Uh, do you want a cupcake? I made some a while ago and we still have some left,” you offer, holding up the box to him.

“It’s the last one. Are you sure?”

“How the tables have turned,” you laugh, and Minghao cracks a bright smile at that and holy crap, if you weren’t so busy trying to keep your composure, you’d be freaking out over how handsome he looks when he smiles. “‘course you can have it. I’ve had plenty of them,” you admit sheepishly as he reaches for the cupcake and brings up to his mouth.

“Holy shit. I don’t blame you for eating a lot—if I had these in my house they’d be gone in like an hour.”

“Right!” Yiren agrees, and you can’t help but chew on your bottom lip when you smile from the praise.

“Guess this is just a sign for you to make more, huh,” Jun says, walking to stand next to you to lean on your shoulder.

“Uh-uh! You gotta reimburse me somehow,” you protest, looking up at your brother with a firm expression.

“Please make more, they’re really good. I’ll buy you boba if you make more,” Minghao chimes, and it’s safe to say you don’t expect it from the way you cough on your own saliva. Yiren laughs at your reaction, and Jun only looks at you weirdly when you nod in agreement.

“Oh, so you’ll make cupcakes when he asks but not for your dear older brother?”

You roll your eyes, saying, “He offered to buy me boba! You know I can’t turn that down.”

Jun huffs in faux irritation, digging his hand into his pocket to fish out his keys. “Ya-da, ya-da. Anyways, would anyone other than my super fake, mean, evil sister like to go to karaoke now?” he asks playfully. All it takes is one glare and pulling on his hair for a few seconds to have him shouting out apologies as the four of you make your way to the car garage.

The ride to the karaoke place is short with Jun in the front and Minghao sitting in the passenger seat next to him. You and Yiren pile into the back, and the three of you scroll through your phones to decide what songs to sing later while Jun drives.

“I get to sing Creep, right?” you ask excitedly, bouncing up and down in your seat.

“How’d I know you were going to bring up Radiohead,” Jun mutters, pressing his head back into the head rest when he stops at a red light, while Minghao turns in his seat to look back at you with wide eyes.

“You like Radiohead?” he asks with a small smile.

The corners of your lips are lifted and your face brightens when you nod vigorously. “Yeah I do!”

“I think ‘like’ would be an understatement. I’m like 99% sure Thom Yorke lives in her skin or something because what she has for Radiohead is a lot more than just ‘like,’” Yiren says.

“No way, I love Radiohead,” Minghao tells you. Holy shit. So Minghao is attractive and nice and smart and pretty much perfect at everything and he enjoys Radiohead? You might go insane.

“Really?” Your eyes are wide with your jaw hanging open, leaning forward in your seat.

You hear Jun groan from the driver’s seat, and both you and Minghao shoot him a dirty look. “I forgot both of you are obsessed with Radiohead. Seriously, could either of you get more emo?”

“If you weren’t driving right now, I’d strangle you,” Minghao says bluntly before looking back at you. “Anyways, what’s your favorite song?”

“Junnie, please, can you put on Creep now? You know I’ve been waiting forever,” you plead, holding your hand out to the microphone that’s in your brother’s hand. The room is dark and lit up with red and blue LEDs across the border, making the room glow purple.

“But I want to sing another round of Taylor Swift!” he protests, pointing at the big screen in front of you while clutching the microphone close to his chest. You scoff, poking his side. “You know I’m not ticklish, so that doesn’t work.”

“You’re not ticklish? How?” Yiren exclaims, looking at Jun with wide eyes.

You turn to squint at her. “He’s weird. I thought we already established this.”

“Hey!” Jun whines. “See this is why you won’t be getting to sing Creep tonight.”

“Jun!” you cry out, and you’re about to pull out a string of complaints and curses, but then Minghao is stepping in, pointing at you.

“Put on Creep. She’s been asking for a while and I want to sing it too,” he says. Jun is quiet for a moment before sighing and handing you the microphone which leads you to puffing up your chest and smiling proudly.

“Thanks,” you chirp gleefully, as Minghao holds his own microphone up to his lips.

When he smiles at you, it’s kind and sincere in such a way that it has your heart swelling under your pretty pink jacket. Minghao coolly points at Yiren who sits by the control tablet. “Creep. Hit it.”

The air inside your house is warm as you skip down the hall and down the stairs. When the bell rang the first time, you thought it was just some package but when you hear it ring twice, you think otherwise.

When you peek through the little peep-hole, you jump up and down on the balls of your feet, a mix of excitement and nerves pools at your stomach. You open the door and Minghao shuffles in front of you at the doorstep. You haven’t seen him in a few weeks, and his hair looks shorter. “Did you cut your hair?” you ask the seventeen year old as you move to the side so he can step in.

“Yeah, it was getting in my eyes too much,” he tells you with a nod, a small puff of vapor coming from his lips. It’s cold, and you hear him inhale a breath of relief when you close the door behind him. “Thought the door was never gonna open. I was freezing my ass off,” he says, unwinding the brown scarf from his neck.

“‘m sorry,” you reply sheepishly as he takes off his shoes, following you through the foyer. “Jun didn’t tell me you were coming so I was in my room. He’s still out with my dad, but he’ll be back soon.”

“That’s fine.” Minghao shrugs off his puffer jacket, placing it on the coat rack while you make your way to the kitchen.

“Do you want a drink? It’s cold outside, so I can make some hot chocolate. Jun got the nice kind from the cafe down the street.”

“That’d be great, thanks,” he says, sitting down at one of the stools in front of the kitchen island as you take out some milk and hot chocolate powder. It’s silent, and you chew your lip while thinking about how this is the first time in a really long time that you and Minghao have been alone together.

Nearing the end of his twelfth year in high school and just like the first time you met him, he’s as enticing as ever. Dancing competitions with Jun, left and right, smart and respectful with the teachers, popular among the students—you're lucky you get to talk to someone as cool as him, even if it is only on the account that you’re his best friend’s little sister.

“How’s high school?” he asks casually as you boil some milk over the stove.

“It’s alright … English is still hard as ever,” you admit, dropping the powder into the frothing milk.

Minghao chuckles softly when you turn around to face him, and a small smile makes its way onto your lips. “Yeah, it was never my strong suit either. You still friends with … what’s her name? Sorry, I’m not good with names—the girl who lost her voice at karaoke when she came with us?”

“Yiren?” you giggle softly, recalling the memory. “Yeah. Still friends, still as loud as ever,” you say with a sigh, mixing the milk as it turns light brown. “How are things with you? Jun’s been telling me the dance practices you guys have is pretty intense. He always looks like he could eat a horse when he comes home.”

“That’s good to hear, and yeah, it’s all going good. It is pretty tiring, but it’s a lot of fun,” Minghao replies, stretching his arms behind his back as you pour out the hot chocolate into two mugs, bringing it over. “Thanks,” he murmurs, grabbing from your hand sitting down at your regular spot, one extra chair seated between the two of you as always.

Arm’s length, you think for a moment, before shaking yourself of the thought. “I’m sure the practice is paying off though—seems like Jun is always talking about some new kinda competition or something.”

“Mhm,” Minghao hums, taking a sip of the hot cacao. “This is really good, thank you,” he says with a soft smile, and you’d be lying if you said you didn’t feel some sort of giddiness erupt in your stomach. “I think … I think we can really take it somewhere—our dancing.”

It’s a sparing thought that Minghao and Jun’s dreams are far beyond yours, and you have a bit of a difficult time trying to understand what he means by somewhere and if that somewhere includes you or not.

“You’re going to Korea?” your eyebrows furrow as you glance between Jun and your parents.

“Nothing’s finalized yet—” your mother says, but when Jun’s eyes flicker between you and the ground, you already know that this is set in stone.

“Yes it is.” Your voice is small when the words come out. “You—” you take a deep breath, “—you’re going.”

“Not now, of course,” your dad says, patting your back as he stands up, your mother following suit. “Talk for a few minutes, yeah?” he says as both your parents walk out. When your whole family walked into your room ten minutes earlier to tell you they had big news, you weren’t sure what you were expecting, but it certainly was not this.

And now you’re sitting with your brother on one end of your bed while you’re curled up against your pillows on the other, unable to meet his gaze.

“When are you going?” you ask quietly, finally breaking the silence.

“August.”

“That’s in a month and a half,” your shoulders deflate as you say it. “How long?”

“I don’t know. I’m sorry.” You bury your face in your hands in hopes that it’ll muffle your cries. It doesn’t.

Jun scoots over to you quickly when he sees your shoulders shake, one arm going around your back to pull you close to his body, but you still can’t bring yourself to look at him. “How are you going to do it?” you blubber as your brother pats your back. “You can’t just go to a whole different country alone and—”

“I won’t be alone. Minghao is coming with me,” Jun tells you quickly. Now that brings your head up. You don’t care that your nose is snotty and that your hair is all over the place and that your face burns, you just need to see the look on Jun’s face to see that he isn’t messing with you.

The way his own eyes are glossy gives you your answer. “Y-you both got accepted into tha-that company?”

Jun nods. “We applied together.”

“Why didn’t you tell me you were applying? I-I would’ve understood. You could have given me more time to process this and—” You look down at your hands, “Fuck,” you mutter to yourself, not finding the words in your throat.

“We didn’t even know if we would get accepted. Me and Minghao promised each other that we’d only follow through with it if both of us got in and we didn’t think that there’d be a high chance of that because it’s so competitive … I only told Mom and Dad because until we got the acceptances, I really didn’t think it was going to actually happen.” You gulp at his words, trying to let it all sink in.

“I think … I think I just need to go on a walk. Take a breather, y’know,” you mutter under your breath as you stand up. Just as you're about to walk away, you stop yourself, looking back at Jun who stares down at his hands. You don’t think twice before wrapping your arms around his shoulders and hugging him tightly. “I’m really proud of you,” you say quietly before rushing out of your room and down the stairs.

You shove your feet into some slippers in the foyer, rushing out onto the street soon after. You aren’t sure what you’re doing or where you’re headed, but you continue to trudge along the sidewalk until you’re walking down the main road.

The summer air is hot and stuffy, and you wonder if you feel so suffocated because of the sun’s onslaught or because of thoughts that run through your head. It’s surrounding you, breathing it in, it fills your lungs, courses through your veins, rushes to your brain—you don’t know what it is, but it’s uncomfortable and has you dizzy and your vision foggy.

You lean against a thick lamppost next to you, hands on your knees as you knit your eyebrows together as sweat beads down your forehead. What the fuck, you think as you breathe in through your nose.

You hear your own name bounce around in your head, and the sound only grows louder and louder until you’re muttering under your breath, telling yourself to shut the fuck up, shut the fuck up, shut the fuck up. And there are tears in your eyes but you furiously wipe them away because while you don’t mind crying, you do mind crying if you don’t know why.

And fuck, there’s that voice again, your name echoing over and over again until it’s growing lowder and ringing in your ears. You think you might start crying again until the voice sounds familiar and you’re whipping your head up and standing straight when you see a car pull up to the curb next to you.

“Fuck my life,” you mumble to yourself when you see Minghao in the driver’s seat of the car. He rolls down the window and god, he looks so pretty with his hair back and upper body fit into a loose yellow shirt.

“Hey, what are you doing?” he asks you, brows pinched into a concerned expression as he looks at you, face flushed and sheen from sweat.

“I—” You’re about to smile at him and let the giddiness of having your crush talk to you take over, but then the words get caught in your throat when you remember the whole reason you’re out here. “—I’m just going on a walk.”

“In this heat?” He raises a brow at you. “Where to? Let me give you a ride. You don’t look too well.”

“Nowhere really,” you say with a shrug. “Actually, I might just head back home,” you rush out, turning on your heel to walk in the other direction so Minghao can’t pry any further, but he stops you.

“Wait, wait, wait,” he calls out, and you don’t have the willpower to ignore him. “Let me drive you home then. Seriously, you don’t look well—like you look like you’re ‘bout to pass out and shit—so just get in the car, please?” He says the last part with some sort of beggary etched onto his face and you just can’t deny him. Not now, not ever.

Pulling the door open, your limbs feel heavy as you climb into the car, air much cooler and fresher than outside. Leaning your head against the headrest, you let your eyes flutter shut as Minghao starts the car.

“Are you seriously okay? You look—”

“Sick, I know. I look sick,” your grumble, eyes still shut. You wonder if you should tell him Jun just told you everything.

“I’m sorry,” and you can tell from the way his voice doesn’t waver that he means it.

“Jun told me about Korea.”

“Oh.” Yeah, very big oh. “Just now?” You nod. “Is that why you were out here?” You nod again, finally opening your eyes.

“Hey, this isn’t the way to my house.”

Minghao keeps his eyes on the road. “C’mon, let’s get some pop,” he says, ignoring your statement and driving into the parking lot of a convenience store. He unbuckles his seatbelt and hops out his end, not saying a word, and you figure that you have no other choice but to follow.

Any other situation and you’d be grinning about spending some time alone with Minghao, but after hearing Jun tell you that he’s going to be traveling hundreds of miles and flying over borders within the next two months has your stomach churning in a way you don’t like.

You don’t know if you want to spend all the hours of the day with Jun and Minghao, or if you want to crawl up in your bed and pretend they don’t exist so it’ll hurt less when they’re gone. You feel stupid for thinking like this—you know it’s going to hurt either way.

You’re lost in your own thoughts as you walk into the store after Minghao, only snapped back into the present when he says something to you. “Hey, those are your jeans that you wore when we first did karaoke right?’

You blink once and then twice before looking down at your pants. They were those same jeans. “Yeah, how’d you know?” you ask him incredulously, and Minghao chuckles as he reaches into the cooler and pulls out a pink popsicle.

“I remember the flowers and how they matched your pink jacket. It was cute,” he says casually, and you hope he doesn’t catch onto the way your fingers twiddle together nervously and you avert your gaze. “Anyways, you like Cola right?” he clarifies when reaching into the drink fridge near the cooler. You nod shyly, thanking him quietly when he hands you a can.

As you make your way to the cash register, you fish around in your pockets for a few moments hoping you’ll dig up a dollar bill or something but then Minghao’s hand is on your wrist and he shakes his head with a smile.

“Don’t worry about it, I’ll cover it.” He turns back so quickly you don’t have time to protest because he’s already sticking his card into the machine, throwing the cashier a thumbs up and walking out the store without a word.

“I could’ve paid for myself, y’know,” you grumble, following behind Minghao, watching to see where he’s headed. You think he’s going to get back into his car, but instead he plops down on the street curb, sitting on the ground. You just look at him for a few moments, contemplating what to do for a few moments before joining his side.

“Yeah, but I wanted to pay for it.”

The sun is bright and it beads down on you relentlessly, but you don’t complain. You both sit in silence as you both tend to your snacks—Minghao tries to lap up his popsicle quickly now that you’re out in the heat and you try to drink as much of your Cola as you can before it grows lukewarm. The air grows thick between you.

You can’t find the right words to say. You suppose there aren’t any right words or any wrong words, and that you can say just about anything right now and it wouldn’t matter.

Glancing at Minghao who takes a lick of his pink popsicle, you feel that uneasy feeling swarm inside of your chest.

You could kiss him right now. You could press your mouth against his sticky lips and lap at the sugar against his tongue. You could hold his face and run your fingers through his hair and cradle the nape of his neck. You could do anything right now and it wouldn’t matter.

Minghao, after all, was leaving.

But you’re scared and Minghao is mature and his dreams are big and he’s brave.

Your eyes linger on his plush lips for no longer than a second before you shamefully look down at the Cola in your hands, suddenly feeling sick to your stomach.

“You’ll remember this place, right? Like—if you get big and famous and stuff, you two won’t forget, right?” you resort to asking. You say ‘this place,’ but really, you mean ‘me.’ You don’t want to be forgotten.

Minghao watches you with his eyes clouded with something you can’t really make out. “Of course we won’t. We’ll remember forever.” Absentmindedly, you trace figure-eights into the top of your can of pop, and Minghao catches the motion.

Using his own finger, he traces the figure of the number eight over the cement of the curb. “See. Like infinity, y’know?”

You purse your lips together and nod, your mind going dizzy. “Can we … can we go?” you mumble softly, gripping the can in your hand. “I think the heat kinda got to me.” It’s not entirely a lie.

Minghao doesn’t question you, polishing off his popsicle and tossing it into the trash before unlocking the door so you can take the silent ride home.

Jun and Minghao flew out two months ago. You went with your family and Minghao’s family to bid goodbyes. It’s not like you wouldn’t see them again—give or take a few months and Jun would be back at home, but he’d have to leave again. And again. And again.

It’s sad, you think, as you slump against Yiren on some random person’s couch. You miss them so much, but when you think about Jun and Minghao, all you can see is the hard work they’ve put into going where they’re headed.

You feel selfish as you bring a cup up to your lips. You feel pathetic and lame and if you weren’t already drunk, you’d be wallowing in self pity as well. The alcohol tastes just as bitter as your feelings, and while you wince when you gulp it down, you don’t hesitate to let some more run down your throat.

Yiren watches you worriedly when you clutch her arm and shut your eyes tight. “I miss them,” you whisper, and she doesn’t know if you’re talking to her or to yourself. She strokes your hair and coos to you about taking you to lie down somewhere.

Your head spins as she helps you stand, letting the cup fall to the ground, not bothering to pick it up. Yiren pulls you into an empty bedroom and sits you on the bed. “Drink this,” she instructs, handing you a bottle of water.

“Yiren, I miss them,” you repeat yourself.

“I know, I know you do. Do you want to go home? I’ll drive you and—”

“No, you go have fun. I just need to sit down for a sec,” you tell her, letting your back fall onto the mattress. Yiren gives you a warning look, but you shoo her off. “Trust me, I’ll be fine. I’ll call you if I need anything.” She looks like she wants to protest, but you both know you’re on a one track mind right now.

“Please don’t do anything stupid,” Yiren begs as she walks away and closes the door behind her. You’re still dizzy, but not nearly as bad as before. Sitting up, you glance around the room. It’s simple—probably a guest room in whoever’s house this is. Also probably why the door was unlocked in the first place.

You feel you might pass out until your eyes land on an open notebook on a table in the corner of the room. You don’t think twice before standing up and ripping a sheet out, scrambling for a pen.

DEAR MINGHAO

I’m drunk right now. I miss you and I miss Jun. I hope when you guys come back again, we can go to that karaoke place again and sing to Radiohead. I’ve expanded my taste you know—my favorite song is Fake Plastic Trees now, and I even got a record player just so I could play the vinyl for it. Sorry I didn’t tell you earlier.

When you come back, we should really go there again. Yiren’s been getting really tired of me singing Creep every time, so I need a new duo partner. And she’s leaving too, so there’s that.

I really want to kiss you right now, but you’re in Korea.

I miss Jun a lot too. I think I hate you for it. He’s my brother but somehow you get to see him more and talk to him more and be with him more. Sometimes I call him and it’s for less than five minutes and I hear your voice in the background and I don’t know if I want to listen to you speak forever or strangle you so you can never talk again. I get that Jun is busy, and that you’re busy, but you guys get to be busy together.

Yiren told me she’s probably going to go to college out of the country next year. I’m going to miss her like hell. I think I already miss her, and so I drag her to karaoke with me so she won’t ever forget about me and Radiohead and how garbage I am at singing Creep.

Jun says he’s going to come visit home in two months, and that you might come along. I didn’t know home was a place you only visit, but I guess being an idol changes you. I probably sound super bitter right now. I’m not. Maybe I’m upset that you guys are gone, but I really am happy for you.Jun is happy, and you’re happy, and I’m so happy you have each other.

It’s hard to focus on your exam—halfway through your degree and you still get the jitters every time you step into the testing hall. It’s probably the nerves. And the caffeine. And the fact that you’ll be seeing your brother and Minghao in three hours.

It’s mainly the third that has your leg bouncing up and down on the balls of your feet as you jot down your answers. The exam takes longer than you’d like to finish, but as soon as you’ve finished the final question, you’re bolting out of the large room and toward the parking lot.

Connecting your phone to your car, you call Jun as you back out of the parking spot. “Hey, you guys at the airport?” you ask when you hear him pick up.

“Yeah, we’re just getting out right now but there’s kind of a crowd so it might take a while to just get to the car.”

“I forgot you guys are, like, famous,” you mutter jokingly. “Where’re you headed first? Minghao’s place first?”

“Yeah probably. He’s gonna see his parents and stuff first and then I’ll go to Mom and Dad’s house, so you can just come there.”

“Okay … we’re still good for our dinner plans, right?”

“Yeah, actually I was wondering if Minghao could tag along,” Jun says, and you can hear some muffled shouting from the other side.

“Oh okay, yeah su—”

“Hey, look, there’s a lot of people here and I can’t hear much so just text me your response and I’ll get to you in a second,” Jun tells you quickly as the shouting grows louder. He hangs up soon after and you sigh heavily as you start driving to your parents house.

The ride is quiet but you’re happy to be met with gleeful parents when you get to their place. You’re all a bit spirited at the prospect of Jun coming home, so when you hear the old ringing of the door bell, you’re bolting to the door and swinging it open, jumping into his arms.

“What happened to ‘hi,’ ‘hello,’ ‘how are you?’” Jun teases as he hugs you close, awkwardly trying to shuffle into the house. You poke your tongue out at him when you finally unwind your arms from around him.

“Hi. Hello. How are you? You seem obnoxious, as always,” you shoot back, and Jun only grins, pinching your cheek tightly.

“Oh how I missed my little insane sister,” he says before moving onto your parents, enveloping them in hugs as you all begin to settle down in the living room. The four of you spend a few hours catching up with Jun before he excuses himself to freshen up so he can get ready for your plans for the evening.

When he comes back all ready, you’re pulling out your keys from your purse and waving bye to your parents, promising them you’ll stop by the next morning as you and your brother make your way to the door.

“See you later!” Jun calls out before closing the front door behind him and following you to your car. Minghao’s house is close by, no more than a five minute drive, and it’s quiet as you take the familiar roads through the town to get there.

“Should we go in?” you ask when you park in Minghao’s driveway. “You haven’t seen his parents in a while, have you?”

“Oh yeah, you’re right. C’mon, let’s go.” You both slip out of the car and make your way to the front door. Minghao’s mother opens the door and you spend a few minutes exchanging greetings and catching up before Minghao is stepping out, clad in some black jeans and a grey hoodie.

He smiles when he sees you, pulling you into a hug, giving you a chance to feel the slightly damp hair against your cheek and the woody smell that always reminds you of him. “Hey, how’s it been?” he asks when he pulls away.

“I-I’m good,” you say shyly.

“Let’s talk more in the car, yeah?” Jun suggests, turning back to Minghao’s parents to give them a hug before you all wave your goodbyes and get into your car.

“Where’re we headed?” Jun asks, as you back out of the driveway. Jun sits in the passenger seat while Minghao slips into the back.

“It’s this new place—opened just a few months ago so I doubt you’d have gone there yet,” you tell him as you start driving.

“Is it the place next to the cafe?” Minghao asks you, and you nod excitedly.

“Yeah … how’d you know?”

“My mom told me about it, and said I should try it out. I guess now’s my chance, huh.”

“Yeah! It’s really good, I hope you both like it,” you say, reaching over to the AUX controls to flick on one of your playlists. “Okay guys … are you ready?” you warn, watching Minghao’s eyes brighten through the mirror.

“Oh my god, don’t tell me you guys are going to sign Creep again—” Jun starts to groan, but you reach over and press a finger over his lips to shut him up.

“Quiet,” Minghao hisses to his friend, scooting forward in his seat so you’re in his view, placing his hands under your headrest. His fingers brush against the back of your neck and you’re scared you might crash the car from the way his touch makes you shiver. Fuck, more than half a damn decade and you still can’t fight it off. “Turn it up,” he instructs from behind, and you can only grin as you reach over and pump up the volume.

The deep rumble of snare and guitar echoes through the car as the song starts and you already feel your heart begin to swell in your chest. So when the first lines of, ‘when you were here before,’ leave your lips, you aren’t sure if you feel your heart mending itself, or if it’s salt being poured on the wound.

Because from behind you is Minghao’s voice, so deep and velvety and angelic it has you almost in a trance. He’s been good at singing, always, but now his voice sounds … mature, and developed and … and you love it.

You think back to the first time you sang Creep with him, and the lyrics already have you reminiscing when you both sing, ‘couldn’t look you in the eye,’ because goddammit you still struggle to look at Minghao for too long because you’re scared you’ll get lost.

And when it gets to the part before the bass is blaring in your ears, Minghao and you are singing, ‘I wish I was special, you’re so fuckin’ special,’ at the top of your lungs and you can’t help but let the irony sink in.

Now you’re pretty sure when Thom wrote Creep, he didn’t mean it to be about your love life, especially not the non-existent one between you and your brother’s best friend, but Thom is speaking to you right now, and you wonder if Minghao can hear the way you’re singing from your heart. How you’re singing for him.

When the song comes to an end, Minghao’s fingers brush over the nape of your neck one last time before he retreats back into his seat. You try to not mull on the feeling any longer, shaking your head of all of those thoughts when you near the restaurant.

“Here it is!” you chirp, parking the car on the curb. The three of you shuffle out of the car casually, making your way to the entrance.

“Looks nice,” Minghao comments as he opens the door for you and Jun. Your brother hops in merrily and you and Minghao both share a soft smile as you go inside too, your body nearly jerking when you feel his hand on the small of your back as he follows behind you.

His touch is warm and gentle and—fuck, does he know what he’s doing to you right now?

You’re more relieved than anything when he finally lets his arm drop, the three of you making your way to the table you booked. You were scared that if Minghao stayed close any longer, he’d be able to feel your heart beating through your chest.

You guys sit down at the table, Jun next to you while Minghao settles across the two of you. “So how’s your classes going?” he asks you as you look through the menu. “Jun said you had an exam today, right?”

“Yeah, it was my final one,” you tell him with a sigh of relief. “It was stressful preparing for it but it went better than I thought.”

“Good to hear,” Minghao says as a waiter comes along to pick up on your orders. After he leaves, Jun turns to you.

“What’s Yiren up to?” Jun asks you curiously. “Haven’t seen that girl in ages.”

“She’s, uh, she’s good,” you reply. “I haven’t seen her in a while either … she went off to college in Korea, remember?”

Minghao chuckles, “Seems like everyone’s going there, huh? Maybe you should pull up too.”

You scrunch up your face and shake your head while you take a sip of water. “I think I like this place too much to leave. Plus, who’s going to take care of our old folks if I leave too?” you tease, nudging your brother in the side.

“Mom and Dad can take care of themselves just fine,” Jun shrugs, ruffling your hair as the waiter brings along some food.

“Looks good,” Minghao says, holding up some chopsticks as you all look down at the sizzling dishes in front of you.

“It is! See?” you say pointedly, looking up at Jun. “Imagine I moved to Korea—I wouldn’t be able to eat this.” Your brother only rolls his eyes and Minghao and you laugh together while you dig in.

As you work through your meal and catch each other up on your lives, Minghao eventually leans back in his seat and sighs heavily. “I’m really craving something sweet right now.”

“I’d say we should pick up some pastries from the cafe next door but they closed two hours ago,” you say sadly.

“Oh shit, I forgot about that place. They made the best chocolate buns ever,” Jun mutters to himself, polishing off his plate.

“Let’s go to the cafe tomorrow evening, yeah?” Minghao suggests as he takes a sip of water. At the suggestion, you chew at your lip.

“Uh, I don’t think I can go then,” you say, hoping they won’t pry any further.

Of course, your brother doesn’t allow you a second of peace. “Why not? Your last exam was today, right?”

“Yeah, but I have stuff to do,” you reply nonchalantly. Jun scoffs and tugs your ear, causing you to whine. “What was that for?!”

“You didn’t clear your schedule out for me? I thought you missed me! You know I have to leave in like a week,” he complains, and you and Minghao share an amused look as you nudge Jun on the side.

“Relax, you can have me in the morning and afternoon and everything … I just have to go somewhere for the evening.”

“You’re being really ominous about this, you know,” Jun retorts, crossing his arms over his chest. “Where’re you going?”

You chew on your tongue, contemplating if this is the right moment to bring it up, or if you should even tell Jun and Minghao this at all. “I just have to see someone.”

“Oh my god, shut up,” Jun groans. “You’re literally asking me to pry. Tell me who—a boyfriend?” You chuckle nervously, eyes flickering between Minghao and your brother, shaking your head.

“No—not a boyfriend,” you say dryly, scoffing at the irony. “Remember Renjun? I told you about him when I was in freshman year.”

“Vaguely. Remind me who he is again?”

“He’s just a guy, and he has some of my stuff I need to pick up.” Both Minghao and Jun cock an eyebrow at you after that. “What?” you huff, leaning back in your seat.

“An ex?” Minghao asks and your face burns.

“I—yeah,” you say casually. “An ex.”

Jun frowns deeply. “I didn’t know you and Renjun ever dated. I didn’t even know you ever had a boyfriend,” he says, voice evidently upset that he was left out of this.

“It wasn’t that serious,” you pat his shoulder as to soften the blow. “Plus it happened when you were on tour—we hardly talked then.”

“Still! You could’ve told me!” You bite back a, ‘But could I really?’ because this isn’t the time or place for that.

“It’s whatever. I just need to pick up some stuff I left at his place and—”

“So it ended pretty recently then?” Minghao piques, and your eyebrows furrow, slightly annoyed by both of their belated interest in your love life.

“What, no! It’s been months and—wait, I don’t see how that’s any of your guys’ business,” you huff and Minghao backs off a little, but Jun still stays curiously leaning in.

“Whatever. You’ll be available to come with us to the lake on Friday though, right?” Jun asks, pulling out his phone and holding it up to your face to show you a picture of a lake house. “I booked a place to stay the night and all.”

“Of course I’m going to come—I’ve been looking forward to it!”

“Good,” Jun says gruffly, still somewhat glaring at you.

You give him a funny look. “What?”

“I’m still mad you never told me—you’re supposed to tell me this stuff! How else am I supposed to know that you’re doing fine on your own and actually growing up.”

“Oh my god, Jun, I’m an adult! Did you think I would never have boyfriends?”

“No! At least not without telling me!”

You chuckle and Minghao follows in suit, enjoying the little sibling bicker. “Okay fine. I’m sure I’ll be telling you every detail of my love life when it gets resurrected.”

Minghao snorts at your use of words, and you revel in the way the sound makes you feel. Fuck it, it’s been more than half a decade and you still get butterflies—you can’t fight away the feeling, so you might as well wallow in it.

You wonder what Jun would think about this—your love life being pulled and shaken by his own best friend. Oh well, some secrets are best kept hidden anyways.

“Here’s your stuff,” Renjun says softly, handing you a paper bag that’s stuffed with a wide array of your belongings.

“Thank you. Is my pink jacket in there? I’ve been looking for it for a while and I didn’t know if I left it at yours,” you ask timidly, holding the paper bag close to your chest.

He scratches the back of his head as he steps back, nodding. “Uh, yeah I think it’s at the bottom.” You peer down at the contents of your back, and give a half smile when you see the pink cloth peeking out from underneath.

“Thanks for taking care of my stuff. I know you’ve basically moved out and all.”

“No worries. Do you, uh, need a ride home or anything? It’s pretty cold.”

You purse your lips at the offer, but shake your head. “It’s fine …” There’s an awkward silence and you quickly wonder if you should say anything more. Renjun looks awfully … apologetic right now and you feel there’s some more you can say. “How’s your new place? Have you seen it?”

“Yeah, I flew up there a few weeks back to get some of my main stuff shipped. A nice apartment, way bigger than whatever I had here,” he says with an awkward chuckle. You appreciate the effort.

Nodding, you tighten your grip on the bag. “That’s good to hear. I hope it all goes well with you. I … I think I’ll be taking my leave now. My brother’s back in town so …”

“Oh yeah, I heard from Jianing. Hope you’re having a good time—I know you haven’t seen him in ages.”

“Thank you. Anyways, I’m gonna get going now. Thanks again,” you say as you step back, throwing out a small wave.

A half-hearted, “See you,” leaves Renjun’s lips as you turn on your heel and start walking back to the bus station. There’s no promise of seeing Renjun later, or ever again, and something cold sinks in your stomach at the thought.

The thought that this all could’ve been avoided if Renjun hadn’t gotten that stupid job offer hundreds of miles away. If he didn’t decide to pack his bags and fly away just like Jun, like Yiren, like Minghao. Renjun was leaving, just like everyone else.

You clutch the paper bag close to your chest as you make your way to the bus stop, one hand fumbling in the pocket of your jacket as you search for your wallet and within seconds you’re a frantic mess. “Shit,” you mutter under your breath. “Shit, shit, shit!” you cry out when you drop your bag and pat frantically over your pockets to try and feel for your wallet.

Your digging into every crook of the coat and there’s a growing feeling of dread that washes over you once you realize that you lost your fucking wallet. Hands clenched at your side, you feel hot tears well up in your lash line as you stare down at the ground, letting in the shitty events of today sink in.

You don’t even know why you’re crying now. It’s hardly even cries, really, you’re downright sobbing as you plop down on the curb of the empty street, fumbling with your phone as you pull up Jun’s contact. Pressing the phone to your ear, you shut your eyes tight in an attempt to calm down your breath, but when you hear the line go dead you cry even harder, realizing that Jun is probably napping right now.

“Fuck my life,” you complain to yourself, letting your head hang low as you scroll through your phone. You aren’t even sure what compels you to click on him but before you know it you’re on speaker as you hear the buzzing of the phone as you wait for Minghao to pick up.

One ring. Maybe he’s busy.

Two rings. He might be looking for his phone.

Three rings. He probably won’t pick up.

Four rings, and you’re about to hang up but then it stops. “Minghao?”

Minghao’s voice is cool and calm when he says your name. “Do you—”

“I need your help,” you say so quietly you aren’t sure if he’ll be able to hear it. And then Minghao hears it: your soft pants and shaky breath and something about the sound has him squeezing his phone tightly.

“Are you okay?”

“I’m—” No, I feel like shit and I’m freezing my ass off and it’s so cold and I need you to help me. “Can you pick me up? I lost my wallet which has my bus card. I’m sorry, I know it’s a little late and you’re probably busy but—”

“Send me your location.”

Minghao is pulling up in his black car within twenty minutes and by then you’ve had enough time to wipe the tears from your face and piece together yourself to look presentable. Rolling down the windows as you wave over to his car, you hear the doors click and you’re roughly yanking on the door and throwing your stuff and yourself in.

Minghao raises a brow at your ruckus, asking once again, “Are you okay?” When you only sigh heavily, buckling yourself up, you hope Minghao will just leave it alone. You’d rather not talk about the stupid breakdown you just had in front of your childhood crush.

Minghao clearly doesn’t get the message, so when he starts the engine again, he murmurs, “Have you been crying?” You purse your lips together tightly as if the question itself as the tears bubbling up to the surface once again. “Did meeting with Renjun not go well?” You’re surprised he remembers his name—Minghao was never great with names. “Can you say something? I’m worried.”

“Sorry,” you say softly, letting your shoulder drop down, and from the corner of your vision you see Minghao watching you carefully. “I-I just got overwhelmed. And it was cold. Really cold. And then—” You take a shaky breath. “—and I lost my fucking wallet on top of it and it’s all so shitty and—”

His hand is on your shoulder and you hardly realize that Minghao has pulled over and parked so he can turn to face you. You’re crying again and you don’t even know how this fucking happened, all you know is that there’s so much going on in your head and Minghao is right there, he’s so close but then again, he’s so far.

“Hey, hey calm down for a sec’,” he says calmly, gripping your arm firmly. “Breathe slowly, and tell me what happened.”

You inhale sharply through your nose and scrunch your face up as you bury your head in your hands. In your right mind, you wouldn’t even think about telling Minghao about what’s on your mind but it’s been a really terrible past hour and you can’t control yourself.

“Renjun’s leaving. Didn’t want to do long distance and so he’s gone and—fuck, I don’t even blame him but why’d he have to leave,” you ramble, tears streaming down your flushed cheeks as Minghao pats your back gently.

“Did he say something to you when you met with him?” he asked, tone laced with concern. “I’m sorry, I’m just—are you o—okay please don’t cry.”

You don’t know why, but Minghao telling you to cry only makes the tears fall faster. “And Yiren—” you hiccup, “Yiren left too, I haven’t seen her in months and Jun a-a-and you—you’ve all been gone.” You don’t realize when Minghao grabs both your shoulders and forces you to face him completely.

“Slow down, please. No one’s left you, we’re all going to be here for you, you know that. Did Renjun say something which made you think like this?” he asks, the grip on your shaking shoulders growing tighter as you desperately try to steady yourself.

“N-no, but you’re not here. I hardly ever get to see my own brother and Yiren and you and Renjun and everything is so shitty I just—” you cry out and suddenly you stumble forward in the seat and before you know it Minghao’s arms are around you.

It’s not like you haven’t hugged him before but this is the first time you’re blubbering into his shoulder about your feelings, and if you weren’t so sad, you’d be fucking appalled. His warm hand is on your back, rubbing up and down slowly until you’ve finally found the conscience to actually breathe and realize just what’s going on.

Slowly, you pull away from Minghao’s hold, furiously wiping away at your face to dry yourself, looking down at your lap bashfully. “I am so sorry, what the fuck, I-I don’t know what came over me,” you blurt out when Minghao drops his hands from your shoulder. You miss the warmth, but you’re quite very embarrassed with yourself and don’t have the will to chase after his touch.

“Please don’t apologize,” Minghao replies softly, watching you with wide eyes. “That … was a lot and—”

“I’m sorry, look, I was just having a shitty day and it all piled up and you just—I don’t know I guess, let’s just pretend this never happened,” you beg with him. Minghao’s face looks like he wants to say more, but you really can’t tell with the way his eyes are clouded.

“Are you sure? You know you can talk to me.”

You gulp at the irony. No, you really can’t. You can’t tell Minghao anything, really, because even after crying and sobbing and wailing in his car he still looks at you with so much care and it has these stupid fucking butterflies erupting in your stomach like you’re fifiteen with a massive crush on your brother’s best friend.

“Can you just please drive me to my place?” you ask, looking up at him with pleading eyes. “I think I just really need to sleep.”

You can tell Minghao still has questions, but you don’t seem too willing to answer them so he doesn’t say anything when he nods and turns back to the road. The ride is silent, and when he finally parks he pats your shoulder.

You look out the window and furrow your eyebrows. “This isn’t my apartment complex …” you tell him, confused as you see a convenience store in front of you. The same one.

“C’mon, I know you love pop,” he says casually, unbuckling his seatbelt leaving you with no other choice to follow behind him. There’s an odd sense of deja vu that envelopes over you, shoving your pockets into your jacket shyly.

“Remember the last time we were here?” Minghao asks with a chuckle as you guys walk into the store.

“Don’t remind me,” you murmur. “That was a shitty day.”

Minghao gives you a nervous smile as he pulls out a can from the fridge and hands it to you, grabbing his own bottle as well. “Yeah, but Cola made it better, right?”

“I guess it did. Cola always makes things better,” you admit. “Hey, fuck you,” you say jokingly when Minghao pulls out his wallet. “You should’ve taken me here another time when I actually had my wallet—I need to pay you back for that day!” you whine with a pout. “Now I’m in debt to you twice! You’ve bought me two Colas!”

Minghao rolls his eyes playfully as he pays for the drinks. “Yeah well things are different now, and I’m pretty sure my wallet doesn’t care about the cost of two Colas.”

“Is Mr. Big and Famous too good for my money now?” you huff when you step back outside, opening your Cola. “I will pay you back, no matter how stupidly rich you get.”

“I’ll have to hold you to that,” Minghao laughs as you slip back into his car. The air is lighter as he drives you back to your place for real this time, and the lingering feeling of pop on your tongue is sweet and fun.

“Thank you for the ride. And the Cola,” you add when he’s in front of your building.

“You remember what I said?”

You nod as you step out of the car, picking up your brown bag. “Thank you so much for this. I’m sorry again.”

“Stop apologizing. Is there … is there anything else I can do? You want another Cola perhaps?”

“Very funny, but I don’t think I want to be jumping off the walls tonight …” you answer, closing the door but still peering through the open window. You think for a second as you chew your lip, nodding when you come up with something. “But do me a favor … don’t tell Jun.”

Jun takes you out to the lake house he booked three mornings after you met with Renjun and sobbed to Minghao in his car. It’s a refreshing turn of events, if you’re being honest, and you’re eager to sink into a relaxing weekend after a stressful exam season.

Your brother drives the three hours on the way with the promise of you driving on the way home hung over your head. When you reach the house—a medium sized cabin perched right by the lake and surrounded by trees and mountains—you’re greeted with the sight of Minghao sitting in his car and scrolling on his phone.

As you and Jun pile out of the car and grab your bags, Minghao comes out too, walking toward you with his hands stuffed in his pockets. “Thought you guys would never come. If you were gonna be late you should’ve just given me the keys to this place,” he says with a huff.

“Don’t blame me,” Jun shrugs, locking the car after you’ve both taken out your stuff, walking up to the cabin’s entrance. “She’s the one who wanted to stop and buy some pop.”

“Don’t act like you didn’t want it either,” you retort, reaching into your tote bag to hand Minghao a can of Cola. “Here,” you offer with a smile which he returns gleefully.

“Okay actually, totally valid reason,” Minghao says, flicking open the can before taking a sip.

“Hey! Don’t be on her side,” Jun whines as he opens up the cabin. Minghao and you chuckle together, your heart warming at the sound as you three start to load your things into the house. Minghao doesn’t say anything about that night when he picked you up, and for that much you’re grateful. This much, you can manage.

By the time you all have settled your things into your respective rooms it’s noon and the sun pummels down with admirable strength. As you stick your head out of your room, you catch Jun making his way down the hallway toward the bathroom.

“You going for a swim?” you ask, gesturing down to your swimsuit that you’ve already eagerly put on.

“Nah, I’m gonna go later. I need to take a call right now,” he says with a sigh and you nod, about to retreat back to your room before Minghao walks out of his own room.

“I’ll go if you’re going,” Minghao tells you casually, and you don’t waste a second to nod. “Give me five so I can get changed and then we can go out.”

You jump down the hall excitedly after he closes the door behind him, making your way to the backyard porch which leads into a deck over the lake. As you place your towel on one of the chairs outside, you hear the sliding door open.

Minghao walks out shirtless, lower half only covered with his swim trunks as he runs a hand through his shaggy hair, shaking his head lightly as he makes his way towards you, placing his towel next to yours. “Thanks for waiting … shit, it’s hot as hell,” he murmurs, and you’re thankful that you’re facing away from him right now—you aren’t sure you’d be able to handle the proximity and the sight of his bare upper body.

“Yeah,” you agree, finally straightening your back and putting some distance between the two of you when you start walking towards the edge of the deck. “The water’s so clear,” you think out loud, looking down at the blue lake in front of you.

“It’s really pretty … you want a picture?” Minghao suggests, walking up behind you.

“I would, but I left my phone inside.”

“Let’s just take it on my phone,” he says casually, holding up his phone in front of you, waving at you to step back a little so he can take a picture. “A candid one would look pretty with this view—like you’re looking out at the lake and stuff,” he begins to say, placing a smooth hand on your shoulder so he can manually turn you around so that you’re facing away from him.

When he lets his hand drop, it brushes over the curve of your hip and you have to bite down on your lip to stop the pathetic whimper that threatens to escape your lips. Luckily, Minghao can’t see the pained expression that makes its way onto your face as he steps back holding up his phone.

“Okay ready …” he calls out from further behind. “Three … two … one!” You hear a faint tapping sound as you still, letting Minghao take the pictures as you wait patiently. It takes a few moments, and you’re about to ask him how much longer he’s going to go at it before you hear the sound of something being dropped, and then a few rattling thuds.

“Minghao, what—” you begin to question as you slowly turn on your heel but by then it’s too late. “WHAT THE F—”

Your scream is cut off short when Minghao runs forward and lunges at you, one arm wrapping itself around your waist as he jumps into the water, bringing you down with him. The cool water of the lake hits your body and the wind gets punched out of your lungs as you feel your limbs entangle with his. Instinctevely, your arms tighten around one of his as your eyes press closed tightly as you feel your warm body start to level with the temperature around you.

And so even as your legs kick around for a few panicked moments, you begin to feel oddly at peace when your head finally reaches the surface of the water, Minghao’s hand still steady over your hips as you gasp for air.

“You’re a bitch for that,” you say, a few choked giggles escaping your lips as you do. Minghao finally unwinds his arm from yours, and while you miss the contact, his body is still dangerously close to yours, and you figure that that is already more than you can manage.

Minghao smiles gleefully, pushing his face so close that it’s right up in front of you. “Mm maybe, but it was really funny. Got it on video too.”

“What?!” you screech, swimming backward so quickly that you hit  your head on the wooden platform of the deck. “Crap!” you exclaim, hand immediately flying up to press against the throbbing crown of your head. Minghao’s eyes widen with concern as he wades his way towards you, tall enough to still have his feet touch the lake bottom unlike you.

“Shit, I’m sorry, are you okay?” he asks worriedly, his own hand coming up to feel the back of your head. His eyes are big and brown as he looks down at you, and for this moment, you forget about the dull ache and bask in the way the sun hits his skin so perfectly he glows.

“I’m fine!” you squeak quickly, letting your hand drop so you can tread in the water lightly, slowly moving a safe distance away from the deck.

“A-are you sure?” he probes, making his way to you, and you have a moment to admire him from afar—the way his hair is matted against his forehead and water drops gather at his lashes, making his eyes look prettier than ever.

You chuckle at the way his lips are pursed together apologetically, and you splash some water at him to lighten the mood. “Yes, Minghao, I’m great. I hardly hit myself.” Minghao’s face looks uneasy, and you laugh again.

It takes a few more minutes of you trying to convince him that you’re totally fine before he finally lets it go. Eventually, you find yourself on a big inflated duck-shaped floaty, laying down with your face up and eyes closed. You lose track of time, enjoying the white noise of Minghao splashing around in the water around you, drifting off into a hazy state until you hear a loud yell and feel yourself being flipped over and off your floaty.

“Jun!” you whine, rubbing your eyes as you furiously push hair off your face when you resurface, glaring at both Jun and Minghao laugh side by side. “You guys have to stop doing this to me,” you groan, eyes finally adjusting to its normal state.

“What are you talking about?” Jun asks innocently as you make your way over to the two of them, not bothering to turn your duck floatie back up right. “It was just an accident I fell on you—hey!” he yells out when you lunge at him. Minghao steps back quickly as you and Jun waddle and fight in the water, splashing water at each other while you try and get your revenge.

“Okay! Okay! I’m sorry,” Jun admits with a pout. “You didn’t do this to Minghao after he dunked you in the water,” he complains as you release him.

You narrow your eyes. “How do you know about that?”

“He sent me the video.”

“Minghao!” you exclaim, turning to the boy who is now treading around a meter in front of you. He only shrugs and grins cheekily.

“It was really funny,” Jun tells you with a laugh. “I might just post it on my story.”

“Oh my god, don’t you dare.”

Jun only shakes his head and starts slowly swimming further into the lake. “Don’t worry—I wouldn’t do that. Minghao can’t have any dating rumors, now can he?”

You chew on your lip, not responding. Minghao doesn’t say anything either, only chuckling along with your brother as he follows after him. You aren’t sure what to say to that, and the comment leaves some uneasy feeling hanging in your stomach.

Fuck, maybe you did hit your head hard.

You three spend a good few hours out in the lake until it’s evening. It’s a slow day and you start to realize just how much you missed spending time with your brother and Minghao like this—it isn’t often they get the opportunity to do things like this, so you’re grateful that they decided to share some of their few days of peace with you.

The second day is even hotter than the first, and you wake from your sleep early in the morning when the sky is still blooming with purple and orange hues. Crawling out from your bed, you make your way downstairs. If it was just you and your brother, you wouldn’t be so mindful about keeping your noise levels down because god knows that Jun can sleep through just about anything, but, Minghao is with you guys now, and you’d hate to sour his experience even just a little by accidentally waking him up for being too loud.

So you can imagine your surprise when you walk into the kitchen to see Minghao already leaning against the counter as he scrolls through his phone. He hasn’t noticed you and you contemplate leaving it like that for a few moments.

He’s wearing a tight fit, black, sleeveless top that shows off the curve of his shoulders and lets the sparkle of his silver chain glint under the morning light. Minghao is attractive—you and the millions of people in his comments know that—and you feel an odd sense of pride well up in your stomach that you’re one of the few people who get to see him like this.

With his hair messy and brushing over his eyes, legs crossed over each other as he presses his body weight against the kitchen island, bare skin glowing from the natural light, he’s beautiful.

Your face heats up when you realize you’ve just been staring at him, so you quickly clear your throat. “Good morning,” you chirp, walking into the kitchen so he can finally see you.

Minghao looks up from his phone, tucking it into the pocket of his sweatpants to greet you with a smile. “Hey, I didn’t know you were up. How’s your head doing?” he asks shyly, walking over to casually run his hand over that same spot on the crown of your head.

It’s an oddly intimate gesture, and if you didn’t know any better, your heart might have given out from the way he was touching you. Still, you know he’s just checking to see if it’s swollen, but your heart flutters anyways.

“I-it’s fine,” you reply, opening the fridge to pull out some orange juice as his hand drops. “I didn’t know you were an early riser. Jun always sleeps in whenever he gets the chance.”

“Yeah, well that’s why he’s paged as a literal cat by everyone,” Minghao says with a chuckle as you place a jug on the counter. “Do you want some tea? I’m just boiling the water now so I can add some more if you want.”

“Sure, that’ll be nice.” You pour yourself some orange juice. “Do you want to eat something? I brought some cupcakes to have for breakfast,” you offer, reaching into one of the bags you didn’t unpack to pull out a box.

“Are they those cupcakes?”

“Yup—the one and only!” you exclaim, opening the lid to show him. Minghao grins, pulling two out.

“God, I missed these. Y’know, Jun actually gave your recipe to Mingyu too, but he just doesn’t make them the same,” Minghao tells you, and your eyes light up.

“Really? Poor Mingyu,” you say with a sigh.

“If you ever end up visiting us in Korea, you should really make some,” Minghao suggests as he goes to take care of the boiling water, dropping some tea leaves into it before moving the water into a pot. Then, pulling out two small cups and plates, he says, “Me and Jun have told the others about how good you make them, but they really need to try them.”

“I’d love to,” you say with a grin, giddy with the way Minghao is boosting your ego. As he pours out the tea into two mugs, you put the cupcakes on the small plates, looking out to the glass sliding door which leads to the porch by the lake. “You want to eat outside? The sky looks really beautiful now, and the weather looks like it’s nice too.”

Minghao nods, holding up the two mugs while you grab the plates and follow him outside and onto the little shaded porch where you sit by two of the chairs and the small, knee level coffee table. The sky is still deep in its changing colors, and you pull out your phone to take some pictures.

“Can you take some pictures of me? For my WeVerse and Instagram and stuff?” he asks when you’re done, holding out his phone in your direction.

“Yeah, of course.” Leaning back after you grab his phone, you position yourself as Minghao poses. “Lean back a little more so the background can—yeah, perfect …” You take a few photos, and Minghao nods happily when you show him.

“Can you take some more candid ones?”

“Sure, let’s switch spots. I think it’ll look nicer if it looks like you’re looking out to the lake from here,” you suggest, getting up from your seat. Minghao complies without protest and you spend a few more minutes taking some pictures before finally handing him the phone. “You like them?”

“Hell yeah I do,” he says, looking through his phone. “You’re great at this,” he compliments sincerely.

“I’m used to taking the kinda pictures you guys like now … Jun has trained me well,” you joke, sitting back in the seat and reaching for your own cup of tea. It’s quiet for a few moments as you both relax and watch the sky grow brighter by the minute.

Jun wakes up an hour later, trudging out his room with groggy eyes as you poke fun of him. The morning is slow for a short while after that before Minghao is reminding you all that you need to start heading back home. The two of them are leaving for Korea in two days, after all, and that leaves them with only today and tomorrow to completely bask in themselves and the rest of their family, so you pack your things and end your stay at the cabin before the clock hits noon.

That night, after you drive yourself and Jun home and you retreat to the comfort of your apartment, you flop down onto your couch and pull out your phone. You’re met with a few notifications from WeVerse and Instagram, casually scrolling through the apps when your eyes catch a few familiar pictures.

It’s on Instagram and you recognize the bright orange of the rising sky that sits behind Minghao who is smiling into the camera. The next picture is a candid one of him looking at the lake while he drinks some tea, and the third is a picture of the cupcake you made.

You grin at the picture—the rest of the world won’t know it, but you definitely do—it’s a little piece of you that Minghao is sharing with the world. Though, you aren’t sure if he put as much thought into it as you are right now.

Brushing it off as Minghao just wanting to share a pretty picture of a nice looking cupcake, you purse your lips together only for them to be parted when you read his caption.

i’m a weirdo

Scrolling through the comments, you come across people saying, many among the following:

ur not a weirdo >:c fellow radiohead fanatic i see is the8 a certified creep? o: i didn’t know minghao liked radiohead … another reason to stan!

As you ignore the increased palpitating of your heart at the idea that Minghao quoted a line from, in your opinion, “your guys’ song.” you sit and think for a moment about what to do. You consider just liking the post and scrolling past it before a funny thought crosses your mind, and so you start typing into the comments.

i wonder who took these pics lol

No one’s going to see it. Minghao is definitely not going to see it, but you giggle to yourself anyways. You’re about to put your phone down when you get a notification of a reply to your comment. Curious, you open it up, and see that it’s just a random person.

imagine it’s his gf

You laugh to yourself. You wish.

The last day or two with Jun goes as they always do when he’s here—slow, but all that you need. He spends his time at your parents house and you stop by for lunch and dinner the day after you both return from the lake house.

The afternoon, you both went down to the cafe and stocked up on chocolate buns—Jun’s request—and spent the rest of your time until evening going over your plans for the rest of the summer. You enjoy this part, always. Not Jun leaving—of course not—but spending these tame moments with him.

It makes you wonder what things would have been like if he never left. Maybe he’d move out for university someplace else, but you’d get to see him more, probably. Get to hang out with him every weekend, instead of every two months.

You shake yourself off the thought as you drive to your parents house. Having Jun around more often would be nice, but there isn’t any point in dreaming about the impossible.

As you pull up to the driveway and park your car, you notice Minghao standing out by the front door with his suitcase and a bag. “Hey, looking for Jun?”

“Well, yeah. Of course I wanna say bye to you both before you go … is the van here yet?”

“Nah, it’s still taking some time but Jun is on the other side of the house to see if the car is gonna come from that side,” he explains.

“I’m gonna miss you guys … you know when you’re both going to come next?” you ask, voice softer than you anticipated.

“I really don’t know—I’m sorry. You know how things are.”

“Yeah,” you mumble, shoulders deflating as you look down at the ground..

“I know—it’s not … it's not easy for Jun, either, I can tell. It isn’t easy for any of us to leave.” When Minghao finishes speaking you only nod, and as your eyes meet,you feel like there’s something he wants to say. “Hey,” he murmurs quietly.

A heavy hand is placed on your shoulder, and you feel you might as well sink to the ground and let the earth swallow you up. “If you’re going to talk about—”

“Hear me out, yeah?” Minghao cuts you off, and when you open your mouth in protest, he continues. “Don’t …” he inhales deeply before saying, “Don’t take what I’m about to say the wrong way, okay?”

You cross your arms over your chest. “That really depends on what you’re going to say.”

“Okay, just … just listen. Jun, and me, and Yiren, and Renjun—” God, why is he bringing this up? “—we aren’t trying to hurt you.”

“Of course I know that.” Your eyebrows knit together and Minghao sighs at your reaction, letting his hand fall from your shoulder. You miss the touch, but your mind is a little too preoccupied with trying to decipher Minghao’s words to dwell on it.

“I’m just saying … you shouldn’t try to depend on anyone.” You open your mouth and then close it, trying to figure out how the hell he expects you to respond to this.

“What d’you mean?”

“Well I mean,” he huffs before continuing, shoving his hands in his pockets, “you obviously have been … upset about people leaving you and you can’t expect everyone to stick around forever.”

“If you’re talking about Renjun, he was my boyfriend. I think it’s okay for me to expect someone who I’m dating to ‘stick around,’ even though it might not be forever.”

“I guess, but it’s not just Renjun, right? Jun … Yiren … me …” he voice trails off.

“I basically spent my whole middle and high school years around you and Yiren, and Jun is literally my brother. Do you think me wanting the people I quite literally grew up around to be here for me is being ‘dependant?’”

“I don’t know what to tell you. I mean we were all going to grow up eventually? Look, don’t take this the wrong way and—”

“Excuse me?” you blurt out harshly, taking a step back, scoffing before you continue. “I wouldn’t be taking this the wrong way if you obviously didn’t mean it the wrong way. You basically just said I’m not independent.”

Minghao frowns at your reaction before responding, “I didn’t say that. I just said you shouldn’t depend on anyone.”

“Which implies that I am depending on people unnecessarily!”

Minghao adjusts his backpack straps as he says, “I mean you did cry for quite a while about how people are leaving you. I just don’t want you to get more hurt by being dependent on others.”

“Thanks for the concern,” you shoot sarcastically, “but I’m not dependent on anyone. I was upset that night because all the people closest to me have moved away and if you ask any normal person, I’m pretty sure they’d agree that that’s a valid reason to cry a little. So sorry if that was too much for you.” You say the last part with disgust laced on your tongue, and you watch Minghao’s face grow increasingly sour as you go on.

“Okay, now you’re just twisting my words,” Minghao huffs, glancing around to make sure that no one is close by.

“What the hell Minghao,” you scoff, clenching your fists at your side. You don’t want to be the person to jump down his throat, but you can’t help but feel like you’re being talked down to. “Why—why are you acting like I’m still a little kid. I’m more than Jun’s little sister, you do know that right?”

“Oh my god, seriously?” Minghao retorts, eyebrows rising in a mix of disbelief and irritation. “You think that’s what this is about? For fuck’s sake I’m just looking out for you.”

“Exactly!” you exclaim, pointing an accusing finger at him. “There’s no reason for that! Like I said, I’m not some little girl anymore and I’ve been looking out for myself for years. You just happened to catch me in a moment where I let myself be sad about it which, again, is a totally valid thing to be sad about.”

“I don’t want to see you get hurt.”

“Well congratulations! You were unsuccessful,” you mumble out, feeling an ugly knot build up in your throat. “I trusted you,” you say softly, and Minghao looks at you with eyes so apologetic you almost think about forgiving him. “That night after I saw Renjun—I-I trusted you,” you add more harshly this time. “And I cried to you even though we haven’t properly spoken in fuck knows how long and you take all that and make me out to seem like some sort of defenseless kid—”

“Can you stop—you’re putting words into my mouth. I never said you were defenseless or not independent or anything like that—I don’t even know why you think I would think of you like that because you know that’s not true.”

“Minghao, I don’t know if you’ve realized but it’s been years since we've talked properly. Just because—” You take a deep breath before continuing your bitter words. “—just because you get to live your stupidly amazing life with my brother by your side doesn’t mean that you know me and that I know you, because clearly we don’t know each other at all!”

“I’m sorry?” he says exasperatedly. “Sorry I care about you or whatever, even though things have changed.”

You scowl, and in your right mind you wouldn’t let your next words slip out of your mouth. “Well don’t. I’ve been fine without your sympathy so far, I’m pretty sure I can go on a bit longer.”

Minghao is about to respond, you can tell from the way his hands fiddle at his sides, but then there’s a buzzing and you reach into your pocket to pull out your phone. “Hey Jun,” you say, answering the call without meeting Minghao’s gaze. “… Yeah, he’s with me, we’re just waiting for the car … okay I’ll tell him.”

Tucking the device back into your pocket, you look at Minghao. “Jun is asking for you on the other side of the house. You should go,” you say flatly and you can tell from the look on his face that he wants to say more, but holds back.

Grabbing his suitcase, he tears his eyes from you and doesn’t look back after saying, “See you,” walking away and around the corner of the street. There’s that similar chill that takes over your body when Minghao says the same words Renjun said just a few nights before, and you silently wonder if this is history repeating itself.

“So,” Yiren says as she plops down onto your couch, kicking her feet up onto your coffee table. “How’d meeting with Renjun go? He give you your shit back?”

“Why wouldn’t he?” you grumble as you walk over and nudge her legs to get her to put them down. “And you can’t just flop down and sit! Put your suitcase away so it’s not in the middle of the room,” you order, trying to be stern as Yiren sticks her tongue out at you.

“So bossy—your best friend is visiting your cute little abode and you can’t help her out with her stuff?” Yiren juts out her bottom lip into a pout as you sit next to her and wrap your arms around her waist, sinking into the couch. “Okay what’s going on. You’re being extra snappish …” she asks a bit more seriously, pulling away from your hold to get a better look at you. “Was it Renjun? Did he say something before he left?”

“No!” you say quickly, looking away bashfully, leaning back against the arm rest. You fucking wish you were in this sour mood because of Renjun because you could manage that. Renjun is gone, and it would hurt but you’d get over it.

You aren’t sure how long it’ll take to get over Minghao, if you ever do at all.

“Are you lying to me? You know I can tell when you’re not telling the truth.”

“I am telling the truth.” Just not all of it, you think to yourself.

Yiren sighs loudly, sitting up straight and facing you completely. “You are so bad at this. C’mon tell me—what’d he say? Or was it not Renjun—Jun? Which Jun was it? Did you and Jun fight?”

“I—”

“Like that one time two years ago and you didn’t talk to each other until he came back a month later and—”

You cringe at the memory, slapping a hand over her mouth. “Yiren don’t bring that up. I hated that.”

“Okay sorry,” she says sheepishly. “But seriously—what was it? Renjun? Jun? Which one? Or wait—Min—oh my gosh, don’t tell me it was Minghao!” When you take more than a second to respond, Yiren gasps. “Oh god, it was Minghao.”

She stands up quickly, looking down at your figure on the couch. Before you can say anything, she turns on her heel and walks towards your kitchen. “Hey, where are you going!” you call out to her, sitting upright.

Yiren doesn’t respond, only reaching into the fridge and pulling out two cans of pop. Walking back, she sits down in front of you and hands you a Cola, opening her own Sprite herself. “C’mon, you need to tell me about this. The pop is just here for emotional support.”

You narrow your eyes at her. You thought you were dealing with the effects of your argument with Minghao perfectly fine, but as you look down at the cold can in front of you, an uneasy feeling bubbles up in your stomach. Taking a deep breath, you set the can down on your coffee table, leaving it unopened.

Yiren gapes at you with wide eyes. “You’re not going to have it?” Neck hanging low, you shake your head, and you hear her gasp quietly. “Oh my gosh, you just turned down a Cola,” she mutters, grabbing a pillow and pushing it in your direction. “Okay now you need to tell me what’s going on.” She pauses, shuffling closer, adding softly, “It’s okay, you can cry.”

And just like that, the dam breaks and stray tears fall from your lashes as you clutch the pillow close to your chest, blubbering your mind away to your best friend.

“I don’t even get it—I thought I was over him?” you question aloud. “Like when I was with Renjun I was happy and I didn’t think about Minghao because Renjun was great and he was so nice but he just—” you choke back a sob and Yiren pats your back.

“But he left,” she murmurs softly and you want to cry harder because Yiren left too, but then you remind yourself of what Minghao said. Taking a deep breath, your wipe your face of your tears and although your lips still quiver, you start to speak.

“It’s okay,” you mutter, because it isn't like you haven’t cried over this before. “I just—I guess I haven’t really tried hard enough.”

“Tried to … what exactly?”

You huff, throwing your back onto the couch as you look up at the ceiling. “You know: get over him.”

Yiren chuckles a little, and even through your sniffles, you laugh with her. “What are you saying—you gonna fuck around now?”

“Maybe not fuck around,” you say, crossing your legs. “More like … have some fun.”

“So basically fuck around.”

“Yiren!”

“Oh c’mon—you need me to set you up with someone? My sister knows a lot of—”

You nudge her playfully. “What happened to ‘Ms. I Want Half of the Proceeds from your Wedding with Minghao?’”

“First of all,” Yiren waves a finger at you pointedly, “I only asked for 25%, but if you two can come back from this, I will be asking for at least 50% because I have been rooting for you two since day one.”

“Aren’t you the one who’s trying to set me up with other guys?”

“That’s only because you come first to me. Your relationship with Minghao—”

“The nonexistent one,” you correct and Yiren glares at you.

“Okay fine. Your nonexistent relationship with Minghao comes second. I want to see you happy. If you get to be happy with Minghao that’s just an added plus because, you know, 50% of all the gifts and—”

“You’re getting 25% max.”

“Don’t worry. There’s still time for plenty of negotiation and—”

“Yiren!”

You don’t live up to Yiren’s expectations—in her words, she wanted you to have a hot girl summer, but you couldn’t be bothered to go through with it. Well, sort of.

The next two months go along as your summers usually do. You take up a job near your apartment, working through the morning and afternoon, spending your evenings at home or occasionally out with Jianing.

Jianing doesn’t know much about anything when it comes to your (nonexistent) relationship with Minghao, and you figure she doesn’t need to. When you need a distraction, all it takes is a quick message asking her to accompany you for whatever endeavors you have going on for the night and she’s on board.

It’s a slow summer, but you don’t really mind. Not burdened with the stress of your classes and with Jun and Minghao gone for the next two months for their own performances and promotions, you have time to focus on yourself.

Occasional parties, indulging in hobbies, daily walks in the mornings, late nights of binge watching TV shows, outings with Jianing—it’s all a part of a simple routine that you’ve curated to do one thing, and one thing only: relax.

It’s only near the end of the summer, around three weeks before your classes are set to resume, that Jun calls you to let you know he’s coming home with Minghao. He seems pretty casual about it, and you’re reminded about how Minghao probably didn’t mention anything about your argument to your brother, which you’re thankful for.

It’s a passing thought that you’ll have to figure out how you want to act when you finally face him again. Whatever. That’s a problem for another time. Right now, you relax.

That problem for another time seems to have become a problem for now. Jun came home two days ago and things were alright—no run-ins to Minghao and you spend time with your brother like you usually do whenever he returns: with bickering and meals.

It’s only on the third day that things become a little … a little iffy. Your brother texts you in the evening to get ready quickly because he’s stopping by with Minghao for dinner at his place, and it’s all happening so quickly that you don’t have time to come up with an excuse.

So here you are, throwing on your sacred pink jacket because it’s the first thing in your vision, some old jeans, and waiting outside your apartment building much less enthusiastically than you’d like. It’s only a matter of minutes before your phone buzzes with a text from Jun letting you know he’s here and you see Minghao’s car pulling up in front of you.

Making your way to the back door where you usually sit with the two of them, you furrow your brows seeing Jun sitting in your usual spot.

“Sit in the front,” Jun orders when you go to open the back door, “I wanna lay down.” You shrug, making your way to the passenger seat as Jun settles into the back, resting his head on the window while kicking his legs up onto the other two seats.

“Hi,” you say quietly to Minghao who nods and speaks his own quick greeting, averting his attention to the wheel in front of him without much more than that.

“Please,” he huffs, watching Jun through the rear view mirror, “don’t put your shoes on the seats. I just had the car cleaned.” Jun clicks his tongue and kicks his shoes off, continuing to lay back in the seat as Minghao starts the car. The ride is silent as he drives toward the restaurant, both you and Jun on your phones while Minghao has his eyes trained on the road.

Once he parks in front of the place, you watch from the corner of your vision to see Minghao unbuckling his seatbelt before your brother speaks up.

“You guys can wait here, I’m gonna grab the food,” Jun says, slipping in his shoes and making his way to the restaurant, leaving you and Minghao in thickening silence. His hands are resting on his thighs and you press your head on the window, looking out as you try to focus on anything but this.

“Uh,” Minghao clears his throat, and you silently brace yourself for what he might say. “Nice jacket.”

Oh.

Glancing down at what you’re wearing, you twiddle with the hem of the familiar pink jacket. You wonder if this is Minghao’s way of holding out a figurative olive branch, and then you think harder about if you’re willing to accept it. “Thanks,” you reply, matting a hand over your hair before turning your attention to Jun who’s walking towards your car now.

Slipping into the back seat, he shakes the plastic bag in the air as he buckles himself in. “Takeout secured. Let’s go back to your place now,” Jun says, tapping on Minghao’s shoulder from behind. There’s an odd tension in the air, and you don’t doubt that Jun feels it, although he keeps his mouth shut about it.

No one says a word until Minghao is parking in his driveway and unlocking the front door. You follow behind the two of them, Jun grabbing the food as you enter Minghao’s house.

“What are you doing tomorrow?” Jun asks, putting the takeout bag on the coffee table of the living room as you all begin to settle down.

You shrug off your coat as you say, “Uh, I have to go back to my place and go out for the afternoon and evening with Jianing. Me and her have this little monthly date day thing, and we’re going to the city.”

“Wha-a-a-t,” Jun drawls out, a frown etched onto his face. You narrow your eyes at him, shrugging.

“What? It’s not like you’re leaving right after tomorrow.”

“Yeah, but I’m not here for long. I wanted to do something tomorrow, since I might be doing stuff after that!” Jun whines, pointing at Minghao. “We might be going to this cool store and take some pictures and stuff.”

You huff, slightly annoyed as you flop down on a couch. “Okay well can’t you do that tomorrow then? I already have plans.”

Jun pouts, and if he wasn’t so on your nerves right now, you would poke some fun at him. “Why-y-y? You knew I was coming this week!”

“Well it’s not like I can clear my schedule for you. If you wanted to do something you should’ve told me earlier!”

“I let you know last week I was coming down!”

“Jun,” you say with a half laugh, noticing the way Minghao’s eyes have been flickering back and forth between you two through the whole conversation, “one week is not enough time to change some plans. I’ve been meeting with Jianing consistently at this time of month for over a year!”

“But still—”

“It’s not like if I showed up to Korea whenever the time’s convenient for me, you’d drop everything you’re doing to spend time with me!” you exclaim.

Jun’s fists ball at his side before he says, “That’s because my job is important and—”

“The stuff I do in my life might not seem important to you but it is very much important to me. Sorry I’ve made commitments to other people before I even knew you were coming, but I don’t know why you’d expect me to drop all my plans just for you. It’s not even like we aren’t going to see each other afterwards too.”

“Well I’d only hope that’s the case—I only ever see you once every few months so sorry for wanting to take some of your time.”

“Guys—” Minghao starts to say, standing between the two of you but when both you and Jun glare at him, he steps back.

“Do you think your time is worth more than mine or something?” you scoff at Jun, ignoring Minghao.

“You know I didn’t mean it like that.”

“I’m sorry, what exactly did you mean it like then?” you hiss.

Jun sucks in a breath between clenched teeth and runs a hand through his hair. “You know what I meant. Things are just—they’re different. You wouldn’t understand.”

“Right yeah. I won’t understand because I don’t have all these girls throwing themselves at me, making me think I’m entitled to everyone’s damn time.” Maybe you crossed a line with that one, but you’re too angry to care now. Hot tears well up in your lash line, threatening to fall any moment now.

“You were the one who was being a brat when you found out I was going to go to Korea in the first place!” Jun exclaims. “Fucking hell, why are you making such a big deal out of me wanting to spend some time with you now?”

Your face screws up into some kind of ugly frown at the words, and you clench your fists as your side. “A brat?” you repeat. “A brat? Is that seriously what you think of me?

“Well you did make a pretty damn big scene about me leaving, so yeah, maybe I do feel entitled to some of your time seeing that you were the one who was desperate for it in the first place.”

“Desperate? Are you kidding me—desperate? I was sixteen and you dumped the fact that you were moving away in like less than two months on me —of course I was upset but desperate? Well fuck you too I guess.” You punctuate the last word by turning on your heel, grabbing your coat off and marching past Minghao and over to the door.

You don’t hear Jun say anything after you do, and for that you are grateful because you don’t think you’ll be able to handle hearing his voice again. Walking out the foyer past the door, you stomp your way to your car, forcefully yanking the driver’s seat open and plopping yourself down with a heavy thud.

Without a word, you press your forehead against the steering and scream a loud and painful, “FUCK!” You can’t even remember a damn thing you or Jun said but all that throttles in your head is the word brat and you feel you might just pull the steering wheel off your stupid car and tear just about everything else apart too.

The prospect is pretty tempting, actually, and in your red, you continue to hit your head, albeit gently, against the wheel as you mutter incoherent curses to yourself. The thud of your skull against the smooth letter rings in your ears until it becomes all that you can hear, so loud that it almost drowns out the knocking sound that comes from outside.

“Holy shit!” you gasp, when you see Minghao from the corner of your vision, standing outside your car with his lips pressed into the thin line. Rolling down your windows, you grimace. “You fucking scared me so bad. Please never creep up on me like that again.”

He narrows his eyes at you. “Don’t fucking storm out like that again then,” Minghao says, and your eyes widen slightly when you hear his voice. It’s harder, firmer, more serious than you’ve ever heard before.

“What are you—”

“You can’t drive when it’s night and you’re sobbing—”

“I am not sobbing,” you fruitlessly choke out, wiping some tears off your cheek as you straighten your back and glare at him.

“Look I get you’re mad at Jun and all but can you please calm down and talk to me so—”

You let out a humorless laugh as you begin to roll your windows back up. “Don’t even get me started on you.”

Minghao clicks his tongue as he sticks a hand into your window to stop it from going up any further, looking sideways for a second before turning back to you. “Okay well I don’t want you to drive yourself home like this. It’s not safe.”

“I am not staying here tonight.”

“Then let me drive you home,” Minghao suggests and you open up to object but no words come out. “You agree? C’mon, step out.” You let out nothing more than a huff as you open the door, slipping out quickly and shuffling to the other side where you sit with your arms crossed over your chest, bottom lip jutting out into a pout.

Minghao has already taken your spot, hands on the same steering wheel that you were planning on smashing with your head just minutes ago. He’s quiet for a few moments as he backs out of the driveway and starts driving down the street, the car echoing nothing but your soft sniffles that haven’t seemed to stop.

When Minghao opens his mouth again, you’re bracing yourself for a round of chiding, but all that comes out is a one-word question. “Pop?” He takes your silence as a confirmation, and soon enough Minghao is pulling up to that same convenience store. “Do you want me to get it for you?” he asks after he’s parked in front of the convenience store.

You purse your lips together, finally letting yourself turn to look at him. You really want to be mad at him but when you catch the way his fingers are shoved into his pockets, teeth gnawing at his bottom lip as he awaits your answer, you start to realize that Minghao might be just as apprehensive about this as you are.

“It’s fine,” you mutter, unbuckling your seatbelt so you can get out, Minghao following you quickly.

You’re the first to walk in this time, grabbing a Cola for yourself before looking at Minghao with a raised brow. When he nods, you toss him another can and he makes his way to the cash register. He’s about to pull out his wallet when you’re brushing past him and getting there first, holding up your card to the machine proudly.

“Just because I don’t want to be in any more debt to you,” you murmur, handing Minghao a can after you’ve paid for them both. You lead the way, walking out of the door and slotting yourself into the passenger seat of your car and Minghao gets into the seat next to you, turning on the engine.

You’re still quiet when he starts driving towards your apartment building, and you think that this is the perfect chance for you to drown in the silence. Maybe if you pretend you’re alone, you’ll be able to forget about all the thoughts running through your mind.

Pressing your eyes shut, you slump down into your seat and just as you’re about to let your mind drift into the silence, you hear a familiar rattle of the snare and guitar bridge and your eyes snap open, staring at Minghao directly. He faces forward, eyes trained on the road as he pulls closer to the curb in front of your complex, sighing deeply when the car starts to slow down.

“What are you trying to do Minghao?” you finally say weakly, burying your face in your hands. “You—you’re playing Creep and you took me to get Cola and all you were supposed to do was take me home so—”

“Can I not try to make you feel better? I don’t want you to be upset, so I’m sorry if I’m trying to do the things I know you enjoy,” Minghao responds with a heavy breath, parking in front of your building just like that night he did when he picked you up from the bus stop after you met with Renjun.

The deep strumming of guitar and vibrations of the bass bounce off the walls of your car, and you slip into your seat as the words of the song sink in.‘What the hell am I doing here?’ Glancing up at Minghao, your vision grows blurry. “Minghao …” your voice is quiet and strained when you call for him, and in that moment, you know.

All those years ago when you wanted to kiss him and hold him and pull him close, but you didn’t because you were scared. When you wanted to let your tongues collide and tug at his hair, but you didn’t because you had so much to lose.

You still have so much to lose, but you’re not scared anymore.

And it seems Minghao isn’t either.

Tonight, you get to taste the lingering drops of Cola on his tongue. You get to feel his arms fumbling over the armrest, slipping around your waist and yanking you onto his lap. You get to hold his neck and let your fingers sit in his hair. You get to indulge.

Minghao’s mouth is hot against yours, tongue lapping at your bottom lip when you take a sacred moment to breathe on top of him before your eyes are fluttering back shut and your lips mold into one once again. He hugs you so close you don’t know how you can still breathe, don’t know how your bones don’t melt into each other in this burning moment.

Your lips work fervently to slide against each other in a wet, calculated mess that has you whimpering into Minghao’s mouth when one of his hands cups your jaw. His thumb is soft against your cheekbone when he tilts your head to the side so that your noses brush against either and his lips delve deeper into the caverns of your mouth.

You don’t know how long you two go at it, fingers grappling at whatever skin you can, Minghao’s hand brushing under your shirt and stroking the plush of your hips. And when you feel like you can’t breathe anymore because your heart is so full, you pull away, letting the thin string of saliva connect your shiny lips.

Your brain is foggy and you and Minghao simply sit in the comfortable silence. Well, almost comfortable silence.

You shouldn’t try to depend on anyone.

“W-wait,” you stutter when Minghao leans forward in hopes to catch your lips in another fleeting kiss. “Oh my god,” you mutter to yourself, pushing his shoulders back against the seat as you try to shuffle off his lap.

Minghao holds your waist tightly, but you break free of the grasp. “What are you doi—hey, wait a sec!”

“You said you’re trying to make me feel better but you just did exactly the opposite,” you scoff, slipping on your coat as you push the car door open.

“What are you talking abo—” You cut him off by slamming the door, and Minghao quickly grabs your keys and follows after you. “Slow down.”

You whip around to face him, tears streaming down your face for what feels nth time tonight. “Look, you left like two months ago spewing all this stuff about how I should be independent but the second you come back you act like you’re trying so hard to make me feel better and stuff and then—” You take a deep breath, “—then we makeout and you—fuck I don’t know, I don’t know what you expect from me! Do you just expect me to forget about this and not get upset when you leave again?” you choke out. “Just keep my keys and drive yourself back to your place. I’ll pick up my car later,” you mutter.

“Can you stop doing this? It’s just like what happened last time, and I don’t want to have to leave if you’re—if we’re not okay.”

“What ‘we?’ Weren’t you the one who told me to not expect anyone to stay? I’m not going to do this ‘we’ and ‘us’ thing with someone who is just going to leave all over again. I’m not going to expect you to stay.”

“Look, I just don’t want this to be hanging over your head when I’m gone.”

Ironic, you think to yourself. You want to tell Minghao that he’s been hanging over your head ever since you met him all those years ago, but you bite back the words.

“Minghao,” you say, your voice strained and tired, “I’m already exhausted and my brain isn’t working so can you please just give me my space.”

And if Minghao is one thing, it’s not pushy, and you know that this is all it takes to get him to back off. Though, you don’t miss the way his face falls as he steps back quietly.

“See you,” he mutters through gritted teeth as he turns on his heel, and you can’t tell if you’re relieved or bothered by the way he leaves so silently.

You don’t see Minghao or Jun after that night. They’rewere  supposed to leave for Korea in the next four days, and so you spend those four days lodged up in your apartment, not leaving unless absolutely necessary—you’re scared that you might run into one of them, as pathetic as that sounds.

Jun doesn’t text you and you don’t text him. It’s a bit abnormal, you two communicate at least once every two days, if not more. It’s a bit of an unspoken rule, but now that you’re both hot-headed and very much not in the right mind, you figure some rules are meant to be broken.

It’s two days after Jun and Minghao were scheduled to leave, the only confirmation that you got that they actually did leave being the group picture at the airport your father sent to the family group chat.

Jianing comes to your apartment when you finally call her over, quickly picking up on your sullen state.

“I don’t get it,” she says with a shrug after you explain to her everything that happened between you and Jun and Minghao.

“Well yeah, I guess you don’t, but this has been going on for a while,” you reply begrudgingly, sinking into your couch as she stares at you blankly from your armchair.

“Just—I dunno—talk to them?”

You give her a funny look. “How?” you groan, throwing your head back. “They won’t be back for like a month at least, and I don’t want to call them.”

“I forget they’re famous sometimes” Jianing mutters, rolling her eyes, and you laugh at the comment.

“You and me both,” you say, straightening your back.

“But still, I don’t get it. I mean just visit them?” she suggests casually.

“I can’t just fly up to Korea unannounced!” you exclaim, bewildered.

Jianing rolls her eyes at you and you frown. “Why not? I mean you just said this might go on for a while if you don’t talk to them so I don’t get it. Just go see them.”

YOURS TRULY

you: chan i need ur help [8:13 AM] chan: this is ur first time texting me in three months [8:15 AM] chan: so i am going to assume this is pretty important [8:15 AM] you: i’m at incheon airport [8:16 AM] chan: what [8:17 AM] you: what [8:17 AM] chan: jun didn’t say anything about u coming??! [8:19 AM] you: DON’T TELL HIM [8:19 AM] chan: what … [8:20 AM] you: i’m surprising him [8:20 AM] chan: ????? [8:21 AM] chan: who knows [8:21 AM] you: um you do [8:21 AM] chan: thank u [8:22 AM] chan: so what do u need [8:22 AM] you: can u pick me up [8:23 AM] chan: i don’t have a choice do i [8:24 AM] you: nope :3 [8:24 AM]

When black SUV stops in front of you by the curb at the airport, you smile brightly, waving at the driver as the windows begin to roll down. You’re about to chirp a quick, “Hi Chan!” but the words get caught in your throat when you see who’s driving.

“Jeonghan?” you ask confusedly. He waves at you from the front seat, and Chan sticks his head in from the back to look at you through the window.

“I’m sorry!” he exclaims, opening the door to help you pull in your suitcase and get situated into the back seat. “Look, I tried to leave without anyone noticing but they saw me so I told them I was going to the gym, but he said he wanted to come and —” Chan glares at the man in the passenger seat, “— I don’t even know why since he hasn’t gone to the gym in ages—”

“Watch it Chan!” Jeonghan calls out from the front as the cat starts to move, pulling an eye roll out of the boy sitting next to you.

“Whatever. Basically, I had no choice but to bring him along and tell them I was actually picking you up.”

“You guys didn’t tell Jun, did you?” you ask worriedly.

“I—no,” Jeonghan says. “And even if we tried, he won’t be awake for another hour or whatever. That’s besides the point anyways—Chan is terrible at lying.”

“You caught me off guard! I wasn’t expecting to see anyone this morning, so I didn’t have any excuses prepared …” Chan huffs, sinking into his seat as you glance back and forth between them nervously.

“Thank you for trying anyways,” you say sincerely, adjusting in your seat. “I know this was all really sudden but I didn’t plan anything out and I kinda ended up here before I could even process anything,” you add.

“Hey, Minghao was telling us about these really good cupcakes you make—if you have time, can you bake them for us?” Chan asks, out of the blue.

You give him a funny look and then smile. “Sure, if I have the time. I’d like to—they told me Mingyu tries to make them for you guys.”

“Yeah! That would—”

“Thank you, but I’m going to assume that you are here for a reason other than making us your infamous cupcakes,” Jeonghan says, merging onto the freeway.

“As much as I’d love for that to be why I’m here, you’re right,” you mutter, resting your head against the headrest.

“Is everything alright?” Jeonghan asks.

As you’re about to respond, Chan chimes in. “This is about Jun, isn’t it?”

“Ai—Channie, don’t jump to conclusions,” Jeonghan reprimands but Chan shakes his head, holding his hand up as he turns to you with wide eyes.

“No, no, I’m not assuming anything. I’m right, aren’t I?” Partly. Chan continues. “Well it’s just—I can kinda tell. He’s being a little snappier. Jeonghan wouldn’t know but—“

Jeonghan gives Chan a warning look through the rear view mirror. “What do you mean I wouldn’t know?”

“Hannie, just listen to me. So me and Soonyoung and Minghao and Jun have been practicing at night right—for that next performance—and you know that Jun has a bit of a temper, especially in the night, but I don’t know—it’s just been different recently.”

You stifle a scoff when Chan mentions Jun having a short temper, looking out the window hoping no one heard. Jun does have a bit of a fiery streak, but the truth is that you’re just as sporadic as him.

Fire meets fire. Huh, wonder what that makes. More fire, probably. That’s what got you here, isn’t it? Unfortunately.

“Has, uh,” you pause wondering if you should ask this, but curiosity does kill the cat, after all. “Has Minghao seemed … off?”

Jeonghan narrows his eyes at you. “What’s Minghao got to do with this? Did something happen with him too?” Curse that emotionally intelligent man.

Chan eyes flicker between the ground and you. “It’s hard to tell when Minghao is upset. He seems normal even when he’s upset so I can’t really tell … why though?”

“Just—just a lot of stuff. I think I need to see them both. Separately.”

Jeonghan nods, pursing his lips together before responding, “Do you need our help?”

Jeonghan takes you to his apartment first so you have a moment to drop your suitcase off somewhere, and you get to say hi to Seungkwan who you’re pretty sure didn’t even recognize you in his drowsy state.

“Where’re we going?” you ask when you get back outside of the building heading towards the car.

“C’mon, let’s walk,” Chan says, pulling you away from the car.

“Jun’s apartment building is just down the street here,” Jeonghan explains. “He should be sleeping right now, so just wake him up.”

“Are you kidding me? He might kill me!” you complain with a frown.

Chan huffs, “Well you did come here unannounced and without a plan, so you don’t have much of a choice anyways.”

You chew on your lip as you fruitlessly try to come up with an answer, sighing in defeat when you come up with nothing.

“Exactly,” Jeonghan concludes, stopping in front of a building that’s built similar to his. “Anyways, his suite number is 345 on the third floor. You should know the code to his apartment right?”

You nod, but then shake your head. “I know it, but I think I’ll just knock until he wakes up. He might actually kill me if someone shows up inside his home unannounced.”

Chan laughs at that when the two of you lead you to the elevator of this new building. “That, he might.”

“So encouraging,” you mutter, sticking your tongue out at them as the elevator door opens. “Anyways, thank you for helping me, really. I’ll make cupcakes if I make it out of this alive,” you promise while you step in.

“You better!” Jeonghan calls out as the doors slide shut and the elevator begins to take you up.

It’s now, when you’re alone, that it all begins to sink in. You’re in Korea. You’re about to see Jun. You might die—okay maybe you’re being a little dramatic, but you aren’t sure what to do with yourself so your mind is jumping towards the worst possible scenario as you reach the third floor and make your way to his apartment.

You stand in front of room 345 for a few moments once you arrive, not even sure if you’ll manage to go through with this. What the fuck are you even going to say?

(Un?)fortunately, you have a tendency to not think before you act, and before you have a second of thought your knuckles are rapping against the door. It’s silent for a moment and you wonder if you should go again.

Taking a deep breath, you continue knocking on the door at a steady rate before you hear soft footsteps growing louder in volume until they stop at the door. You hold your breath and let your hand fall, fisting it at your sides in anticipation.

When you see the door crack open, a wave of relief washes over you. But when you see Jun’s blank face as he looks down on you, a new sense of uneasiness takes over.

“What are you doing in my apartment?” Ah, how nostalgic.

“So cold. You aren’t going to let me in?”

Jun rolls his eyes, and you grow more anxious because you can’t tell if he’s being playful or not. He steps to the side though, and you quickly slip through the door so he can close and lock it behind you.

“What are you doing here?” he reiterates and you feel your tongue go dry.

“Uh, Chan told me that you’re being—well—how do I put this?” you mutter to yourself, rocking back and forth on your feet.

“Difficult?” Jun guesses, bitterness laced in the word and you cringe at the tone.

“I guess.”

“I don’t think you came all the way to Korea just because Chan told you I was being difficult.”

“I, uh, I talked to Jianing about it when she visited and … I guess I felt I should come see you.”

“So if Jianing didn’t talk to you about this, then you just wouldn’t have talked about it?” Jun asks harshly and you glare at him.

“Well it’s not like you would’ve come talk to me about it either,” you retort, and Jun goes quiet at them. “And Jianing didn’t make this decision for me, by the way, I made it all by myself.”

“Okay well you’re here now. What is it?” An uncomfortable silence sits between you two. “If you only came here to just stand there and stare off into space then—”

“Jun, please shut your mouth for like one minute,” you mutter, pinching the bridge of your nose. “I-I wanted to apologize. That night I … I was on edge.” Jun watches you intently as you finally meet his gaze. “There was a lot running through my mind and I was just—just fucking annoyed at everything and I took everything you said the worst way.”

A feeling of worry climbs up your throat—you and Jun don’t often apologize, at least not like this. Apologies usually come in the form of figurative olive trees—you buy him a LEGO set, he buys you a gift card to your favorite cafe, or something among that. Then again, this isn’t your usual argument with Jun, and maybe sometimes resorting to more traditional methods are most effective.

Jun sighs softly, not looking at you, and you grow worried that he’s even more angry than you anticipated. You brace yourself for his next possible words. “I … I did say some mean stuff too. I’m sorry—I just—I have a shitty temper. You know that. Chan probably told you that too.” Jun is silent for a second before continuing. “Is … is everything okay?”

The question isn’t quite what you’re expecting and you press your lips together tightly because you want to cry. You want to let the tears stream down your cheeks and tell Jun that you have no idea but also the perfect idea of what you’re doing and it’s all jumbled up mess in your head.

“I guess—I mean, I hate fighting with you,” you admit. “But, that’s why I came here and we didn’t say goodbye the last time and I know that was partly my fault but also I missed you.”

“But are you okay?”

“Jun—”

“Because I know you’re stubborn—it really is annoying sometimes but I’m not one to complain,” he adds with a huff, “and I know you’re a little weird—”

You both laugh and you point a finger at him, “Watch it—you and me both.”

“Whatever,” he says lightly before turning to a more serious tone. “But I never thought we’d fight again like that one time two years ago and—”

“Why does everyone keep bringing that up!? Yiren said that too,” you sigh.

“To make a point. Which, by the way, is me going back to asking you if everything’s okay. I just … I know that you’re a little crazy but I never thought that you’d fly over here for something that we could probably sort out over the phone. Not that I’m not glad to see you here, I mean, I am, I’m just … worried.”

“I kissed Minghao,” you blurt out, immediately slapping a hand over your mouth after you do.

“What?!” Jun’s eyes go wide for a moment before he relaxes a little. “Is that what’s been up with you?”

“What do you mean ‘up with me?’”

“Moody. Cranky. Like you’re in high school again.”

You cross your arms over your chest. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.” You chew on your lip as you try to read Jun’s expression. He doesn’t seem mad nor happy nor confused, and you’re running out of emotions to label him under.

“I knew you liked him in high school, you know. Thin walls, plus Yiren is loud as hell.”

“Ugh, I always told her to keep it down! She didn’t believe me!”

“Doesn’t matter now. What you or him do isn’t much of my business anyways,” Jun mutters, awkwardly stuffing his hands in the pockets of his hoodies. “I mean I guess it is, if it makes you all upset and not okay like this,” he continues.

You can tell he’s encouraging you to explain more, and you press your eyes together trying to figure what and what not you should say. “Has Minghao … has he seemed different?”

“I mean not really, but also it’s hard to tell with him because—” Your whole finger droops and Jun quickly places a hand on your shoulder. “Hey, what is this about? Did something happen? You know you can tell me.”

“It’s a lot,” you confess. “I don’t know, I-I came here to talk to the both of you but I haven’t even thought about what to say to him. I kind of booked my tickets last night.”

“Last night?!”Jun exclaims. “Are you stupid or what?”

“Maybe I am!” you murmur, slapping your palm against your forehead. Jun looks down at your pained expression and frowns.

“You’re not going to tell me what happened, are you?”

“What happened to, ‘I don’t care what you guys do it isn’t my business?’”

“Well it is my business if you’re upset! I’m the only person who’s allowed to be a bitch to you.”

“Well ditto to you too!” You follow with a sigh. “I think I just need to talk to him.”

“He’s at the gym right now. Do you want to get coffee instead?”

“Hogging me all to yourself? I know you missed me but don’t you think this is a little unfair—I’d like to at least say hi to the others first. Or maybe have some time to sleep. I kind of got here at like seven in the morning.”

“Be grateful! I’m actually looking out for you, because they’ll literally hound you, plus I want to make up for not spending time with you last time I visited.”

You grin at the words, rolling your eyes playfully. “Fine. But you’re paying.”

“When do I not pay for you?”

“Loads of times!”

“That’s because you insist on paying for yourself.”

“Irrelevant!” you exclaim triumphantly, waving a fist in the air before Jun locks his arm around your neck and traps you in a headlock. Good times.

“We have afternoon practice, then recording in the studio in the evening, but we should be done by like eight,” Jun explains, taking a picture of the coffee in front of him.

“Must you take a picture of everything?” you sigh, taking a sip of your own drink. Jun rolls his eyes, flicking your knee from under the table.

“I am a celebrity. I kinda need to keep records of everything I do.”

“Okay well I’m your sister and I kinda need you to help me talk to Minghao.”

“Just like—I dunno—find him and talk to him. Can’t be that hard.”

“You—ugh, you’re just like Jianing,” you groan. “No help!”

“Okay fine, fine. What do you want me to do? Corner him? Lock him into a closet and keep him there so you can talk to him? Force him to—”

“Junnie what the hell,” you mutter, slapping a hand to your forehead. “I think I’m just going to have to ask Jeonghan and Chan for help again because—”

“Okay no. I’ll help. What do you need me to do?”

“Have you been listening to me? Tell me when and where I can talk to him!”

“Well I already suggested the closet but you turned that down so—”

“Jun.”

“We can try the meeting room? He’s there a lot and it’s usually empty in the evenings. He responds to emails and shit there, I don’t know, so you won’t be interrupting much.”

“You sure it’ll work?”

Jun cocks an eyebrow up. “You don’t trust me?” You kick him under the table and he winces. “Okay yes, yes, it’ll work so would you stop kicking—hey! I said stop kicking!”

“We have afternoon practice, then recording in the studio in the evening, but we should be done by like eight,” Jun explains, taking a picture of the coffee in front of him.

“Must you take a picture of everything?” you sigh, taking a sip of your own drink. Jun rolls his eyes, flicking your knee from under the table.

“I am a celebrity. I kinda need to keep records of everything I do.”

“Okay well I’m your sister and I kinda need you to help me talk to Minghao.”

“Just like—I dunno—find him and talk to him. Can’t be that hard.”

“You—ugh, you’re just like Jianing,” you groan. “No help!”

“Okay fine, fine. What do you want me to do? Corner him? Lock him into a closet and keep him there so you can talk to him? Force him to—”

“Junnie what the hell,” you mutter, slapping a hand to your forehead. “I think I’m just going to have to ask Jeonghan and Chan for help again because—”

“Okay no. I’ll help. What do you need me to do?”

“Have you been listening to me? Tell me when and where I can talk to him!”

“Well I already suggested the closet but you turned that down so—”

“Jun.”

“We can try the meeting room? He’s there a lot and it’s usually empty in the evenings. He responds to emails and shit there, I don’t know, so you won’t be interrupting much.”

“You sure it’ll work?”

Jun cocks an eyebrow up. “You don’t trust me?” You kick him under the table and he winces. “Okay yes, yes, it’ll work so would you stop kicking—hey! I said stop kicking!”

You twiddle your thumbs nervously behind your back as you wait in the elevator with Jeonghan. Jun had to take care of something with one of the other members, so he sent you off with the older boy to take you to the meeting room.

“He’ll be there, don’t worry,” Jeonghan tells you as he pats your shoulder lightly. “I just checked his location and I’m positive he’s there right now.”

“Thanks,” you say with a sigh, shifting your weight from leg to leg, “but I’m more worried about what I’m going to say. I think you already know but I planned like zero percent of this.”

“It’s becoming increasingly evident, unfortunately,” Jeonghan admits when the elevator dings and the door opens onto a floor full of rooms. “You’ll figure it out, I’m sure, seeing as you’re just like Jun.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Jeonghan chuckles and leads you to a door a few steps down the hallway, pointing to it. “Don’t worry about it. He’ll be in there. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ll be down on floor three making some ramen,” he says cheerily, waving at you before retreating to elevatory before you have even a moment to protest.

So now you’re left with nothing but yourself and yet another door. This time, instead of knocking your life away, your hand is pressed against the knob as you debate whether or not you should turn it or not.

Once again, your body acts without your mind and you’re quietly opening the door and poking your head through the crack. Inside is Minghao with headphones over his ears, sitting at the end of a long table with his head crooked down as he scrolls through his lap top.

He doesn’t hear you, but you aren’t sure if it’s for the better or the worse. In some ways, you still have a chance to run, but in others, you’ll have to call out to him if you want him to notice you. Gulping, you realize that you’ve been too scared for too long and so you clear your throat.

“Minghao,” you call out.

It only takes a second for his eyes to shoot up, hands flying to his headphones to take them off as he takes in the sight of you in front of him. You’re at opposite ends of the room right now, and you nervously shut the door behind you as you finally meet his gaze.

“What are you doing here?”

“I—” You inhale sharply. “—I don’t know. I just think we both needed to talk.”

You can see him visibly gulp as he stands up, and looks away as if trying to figure out what he should do with himself.

“Shit,” he mutters under his breath, dread washing over you.

“I’m sorry,” you blurt out, face burning. “I know I just showed up like this without warning and I know that’s not fair so if you don’t want to talk you know I totally get it and—” you start to blabber so fast you hardly notice him walking over and down the length of the table, “—I just really wanted to see you and talk to you but I couldn’t do it over the phone because—”

“Slow down,” Minghao says firmly, now standing in front of you as he gazes down with wide eyes. “Is everything okay? When did you come here—wait, did you come here just to talk to me?”

“Well yeah. And Jun.”

“Are you okay?” Minghao asks softly. “This doesn’t seem like you.”

You wince at the familiar words but shake it off. “I know, I just had so much to say and I’m sorry because you were right, and when you said you didn’t want this hanging over my head I was angry and I thought I could ignore this and ignore you but I was wrong and just really needed to sort things out. And the night you picked me up after Renjun and all—I know you told me to not depend anyone or anything—and I know I’m not listening to you right now and I don’t want you to be disappointed but—”

“Stop,” Minghao says, holding a hand up. “Disappointed? I—please don’t think that. The stuff I said that night was …” he sighs before continuing. “You were so upset that night because you didn’t have us around and I felt so bad but also, there wasn’t anything I could do about that.”

“I …” your eyebrows knit together as you try to find the right words. “… I know that. I didn’t mean to make it feel like you had to change anything, or that it was your fault.”

“I know and—”

“Wait, please hear me out. I don’t want to ever make you think that I blame you or Jun for leaving—I-I’m so happy for you guys you don’t understand. I was just … I was bitter,” you admit. “And I was jealous of you because you get to be around my own brother more than me and … I guess I was also jealous of Jun because he gets to be around you so often too.”

You finish your confession by burying your face in your hands, face heating up as you can only imagine the look on his face. He says your name softly, and you peek up at him through the gap between your fingers.

“Hey, no, I get it. I mean, I guess I don’t exactly understand how you’re feeling but I don’t blame you either.”

“I wrote you a letter,” you blurt out, a hand digging into your pocket as it toys around with the folded paper inside. Minghao raises a brow, and you pull it out and hold it in front of him. “Right after you guys left,” you explain as he takes the paper from your hand, carefully unfolding it. “Don’t open it now! That’s … embarrassing. Just read it when I’m not here or something because I might just die out of humiliation.”

When Minghao chuckles, you feel some of the tension in your shoulders dissolve. “Noted,” he murmurs, tucking it into the pocket of his sweats before turning his attention back to you with a more serious expression which has your stomach tying up in knots.

“You know how my job is. I can’t promise how often I’ll be home and when I’ll be able to make time and I know that people leaving hurt you so much and … I guess I just didn’t want to give you hope that I would be able to give you a ‘normal’ relationship, because I can’t, even though I want to. I think when I told you all that, I just—fuck—I hoped that you’d be able to focus on someone better for you.”

You want to cry and tell him that you don’t want someone ‘better,’ but choose to save those words for a different time. “T-then why’d you kiss me that night?” you ask quietly.

“I—” Minghao pauses, looking down as he searches for what he’s about to say. “I only have so much self control.”

You chew on your lip, debating if you should frown or grin at his statement. “So you—you wanted to kiss me?” Minghao responds in a heartbeat.

“Of course I did,” and then he clears his throat, “I wanted to for a while. I still do.”

Chuckling nervously, you start to say, “I don’t kn—”

The air is successfully sucked from your lungs when Minghao slides his hand around your neck, angling your jaw up with his gentle thumb. You think you might just go dizzy from the way he’s touching you until his warm mouth presses against yours, and this is the moment you feel every last muscle in your body let go.

He kisses you softer than the first time, his tongue running against your bottom lip for only a moment before you let your hand grip at his torso instinctively. “Sorry,” Minghao murmurs sheepishly when he breaks away. “Told you. Only so much self control.”

“I-I won’t complain,” you admit quickly, and though you let your hand drop to your side, Minghao keeps his where it is: cradling your cheek. He’s quiet for a moment before whispering again, and the words make your face burn and your heart fly around in circles.

“Can I kiss you again?”

link to smut!

“You have everything? Your tickets?” you ask as you lean against the doorframe. You’re both standing outside your parents house right now, waiting for Jun to finish his last bit of packing (why he was so insistent on you two coming quickly when even he wasn’t ready is still a mystery to you) so you can call over the van to take them to the airport.

Minghao shrugs at you, pulling out his wallet to look through the pockets to double check. As he’s shuffling through them, a familiar piece of paper sticks out and grabs your attention. “You keep my letter in your wallet?”

Minghao nods, seemingly unbothered by your surprise. “Yeah. Where else would I keep it?”

“Well, I don’t know but—”

“It’s a cute letter!” Minghao reasons. “And I like having it with me. Like a little good luck charm.”

You press a kiss to his cheek when he says that, but continue to say, “I don’t get what’s so cute about me getting drunk and writing to you.”

“Okay that part, I don’t like. Seriously. Underage drinking is not cool,” Minghao mutters. “But the rest of the letter is pretty nice I guess,” he teases, tucking his wallet back into his pocket.

“Pretty nice?” you scoff, trying to snatch the wallet back from him to grab your letter. He swipes it away too quickly though, and you’re left pawing at his chest to try and get it back. “You don’t deserve that letter! I put my heart and soul into it!”

“Heart and soul? I think you mean you poured five shots of vodka into it.” You frown deeply, and Minghao relaxes his shoulders. “Okay I’m sorry—you know I love the letter.”

“Do I?” you huff stubbornly, looking at the ground.

Minghao traces a hand down your face and tilts your chin upwards. “C’mon look at me,” he murmurs, and you begrudgingly meet his gaze. “I love the letter.” He pecks you on the lips. “Do you believe me now?”

“You might have to kiss me one more time for that.”

Minghao grins and presses his lips on yours again, a little harder this time. “Good now?”

“Yes—you got lucky.”

“Okay good … but just for extra measures, I have something that might sweeten the deal,” Minghao tells you, pulling a folded paper out of his pocket and handing it to you. Carefully, you take it and unravel it, glancing over the words.

There’s a lot—like a lot—and Minghao’s face flushes as you skim over the paragraphs he wrote, slapping a hand over the paper. “Okay don’t read it in front of me!” he whines, and you beam because history has a tendency to repeat itself.

“Fine, fine,” you sigh, looking down at it one more time when your eyes catch a little note at the bottom.

Pursing your lips, you glance up and find Minghao watching you with wide eyes and a bright smile, and you can’t help but fling yourself into his arms. Your heart swells when you feel him wrap his hands around you rightly pulling him close as the words cast their imprint into your mind.

You’re happy. So, so, so happy.

Yours truly, Xu Minghao (weirdo)

P.S. I love you.

a/n. okay wow i can't believe this is done ... genuinely put so much into this fic i hope u all enjoyed reading it as much as i enjoyed writing it! i definitely might be writing more about these two bc i loved them so much😭 i had like 2 more ideas for a smut in mind but decided not to add them but if you'd be interested in reading them, i might post them as a oneshot/bonus, so lmk what you're interested in! please reblog if u did, and let me know ur thoughts—it would mean a lot to me :3

tags. @synthetickitsune @ixayjun @leejihoonownsmyheart @dahliatopia @gyuswhore @hoeforcheol @5xiang @hajimelvr @miriamxsworld @blinkjunhui @lixiel0ver @josefines-things @mimisxs @ming-h0e @kawennote09 @bbyjjunie @junhui-recs @ichorjeon (strikethrough could not be tagged)

[buggachat]

Honestly I think my take on the "Chat Noir was not there in the final battle" comes down to the fact that I kind of just don't think a satisfying final battle between Chat Noir and Monarch was actually possible.

I read a lot of fic, for example, and I've read the scenario play out a lot of times in a ton of ways and I've never been fully convinced of it tbh (and not because they weren't great fic!!). It seems just completely traumatic for Adrien in a way that the scenario inherently cannot properly focus on, because it's all happening in the middle of an action scene and Adrien is too busy being Mid-Battle to properly have a cathartic breakdown about it all. I mean, Chat Blanc already showed us what would happen if he did have a breakdown mid-battle (and why wouldn't he?). And though it'd be fun to have a big triumphant moment of him defeating his abusive father, Adrien simply isn't a character who would find that scenario triumphant, or cathartic, or anything other than viscerally traumatic.

Also, I agree that it's unfair that Chat Noir was not present— like it was unfairly tilted in Ladybug's favor— but I don't think it'd be fair if he was present, either. Because Marinette is, in fact, the main character. The main character whose character arc is primarily focused on her finding her footing as a hero and discovering all the responsibilities that come with that power (as opposed to Adrien, whose character arc is moreso about freedom and identity). And let's face it, in a fight between Ladybug and Chat Noir and Monarch, nobody would be focused on Ladybug at all. It's not about her. It's not her fight. She'd just be there as moral support and an extra set of hands, which really doesn't work for her character arc at all and is completely unfair to her!

Basically, it would just be Chat Noir temporarily acting as the main character and having the worst time of his life in the most un-cathartic battle for him possible left completely traumatized with Ladybug in the background awkwardly trying to comfort him after the fact? And then the season ends? And then the next season presumably goes back to Ladybug being the main character? After a time-skip to the new school year? It's just an ending that I feel like is a lot better in theory than actually on paper. And you can probably make an argument for ways that it could be made to work, where it would enhance Ladybug's story in a meaningful way where she still feels like the main character, and would somehow be triumphant for Chat Noir despite it probably being the worst moment of his life, and somehow not make the rest of the series following feel like bonus content as opposed to a continuation of the story...... but, I dunno. I think it's a lot easier said than done.

The fact of the matter is, I've always been waaayyyy more interested in how the aftermath of Gabriel's defeat affects Adrien than the battle itself. Post-Hawkmoth defeat is one of my favorite types of fic for a reason, and it's because the aftermath can be so juicy, especially for Adrien as a character. I think whether or not Adrien is actually there in the battle itself has always been kind of irrelevant to me, because no matter how Gabriel is defeated, his defeat will have immense repercussions on Adrien's life going forward. And the way they did it, Marinette is now a part of it in a more active way, too. Which is good for her character!

( Also, if he was there to triumphantly defeat Gabriel, would that mean he would just.... watch his father die? of cataclysm? a-and.... nathalie would just.... die, too? so he'd have three dead parents after all that? who he watched all die (or, in emilie's case, saw her corpse)? or is this a scenario where MONARCH BEATS CHAT NOIR and still makes the wish? is that cathartic? for Adrien to lose to Gabriel? Frankly, I loved seeing Gimmi and The Wish, it's been teased for so long that I was expecting it, and I loved the fact that Nathalie got to live as her narrative reward for coming to her senses and trying to murder Gabriel with a crossbow. I like that we got to watch a full season of Gabriel painfully dying to a cataclysm— poetically inflicted on him by Adrien, but of Gabriel's own doing. I like that Nathalie has presumably adopted Adrien after having an arc of her trying to be a parent to him once she realized nobody else would, that's so much more interesting than any other alternative. I just don't see how all of these things, some of my favorite things that season 5 gave, can still all exist at once with Chat Noir present in the final battle in any way that's satisfying. )