#i say sections not chapters because fun fact with how i have this plotted out and planned i have NO IDEA where to split them into chapters

[florallychaotic]

Guys I'm not even done with the fourth section of thirty three

[valeriianz]

For the fic writer asks:

4. Obviously you did research for BitB. I'd love you to ramble about it if you like I'm sure you've got STORIES

5. Did you outline it?

7. How'd you decide it would be Hob's pov?

25-27 I'd love to know a/some favorite lines, details, and any lore you might want to share

omg TJ what wonderful questions! thank you!! this is going to get LONG!

4: Rambling about research!

do you wanna see a screen shot of my bookmarks under my "band au" folder?

man, and that's only what could fit on the screen.

there is... SO MUCH i chose to ignore for this fic. ideas that i had to drop, lines or extra details about the other band members equipment. more logistics, what Lucienne actually does, what Mervyn has to put up with as the new touring stage manager... i realized very early on that i couldn't possibly cram all this (super cool and eye opening) information into the fic and still keep reader's interest and, most importantly, to not stray away from the fact that this is a dreamling fic. whenever i felt myself getting carried away with a side character or job or even social media numbers, gossip, outside POVs, i had to reign myself in and get back on track. there will be time for exploring everything i missed in side stories after BitB is finished. i just hope i still have the energy to write it all.

once, i was so deep into research that after publishing chapter 2, i went into work and when my chef asked what "GA" meant on my prep list, i answered with full confidence, "general admission."

(it means "get ahead.")

the worst part of this entire writing process is im still learning new shit. i havent rewatched or read a lot of what i've saved because, to be very honest, i was feeling a little burnt out. it's why we're kinda full steam dreamling now. it's why ive been glossing over a lot of technical stuff and being vague about conversations amongst the crew/not including it at all. i don't prefer ignoring my research, but at the end of the day i want to still enjoy writing this fic and finish it. even if i can't be as descriptive and detailed and nuanced as i used to be.

5: Did you outline the fic?

(also asked by @hardly-an-escape!)

i wouldn't call what i have a proper "outline," it's more like a 20k word document filled to the brim with notes that i skim at least a dozen times while i'm writing a new chapter (being in my brain is literally hell). i live multichapter life very dangerously. i copy and paste lines or sections (always scattered, never together! augh!) that are meant to go together and plop them in a new document titled "band au ch.#" and then i structure the chapter around what i want to happen.

but to answer this question in the plainest of terms: yeah. i know exactly what's going to happen up until the very end. even if its all in my head and the only concrete shit that's written down are beats/plot points. i'll figure out the rest later!

7: How'd you decide it would be Hob's POV?

i actually never even considered writing it from Dream's POV. this was my first fic in the fandom (which is so nuts to think about lol) and writing in Dream's POV sounded so scary lol. i also just thought Hob's would be easier because i have worked a few backstage shows, back in my college years. i figured eh, i can make this work. and i loved exploring how weird and mysterious musicians can be, from a normie's POV. making Hob a fan first and having him worry about developing a parasocial relationship... it was fun to explore.

25: Share your favorite line

oh god, i have so many haha.

“What are you thinking about?” starting in ch.2 and onward lmao

“It’s–” Dream laughs quietly, bitterly. “I don’t like change.” He says each word with emphasis, eyes trailing down to fixate somewhere past Hob. “And I still hold onto the things I can control, like my instruments–” his eyes swing up to regard Hob apologetically. “Or my clothes or my–” he brings a hand up and wiggles his fingers around his head. “My hair.” ch.4

"His majesty is pleased." ch.5

“You are obsessive,” he states, slow and cool and with a quiet smile cracking through his composure. “Just like me.” ch.7

“You look good.” Hob has to lean in to say so, unwilling to raise his voice amongst the roar of the fans. ch.11

“Del looks like porcelain, but she’s actually made of steel.” Desire swirls the contents of their glass before pushing their shoulders back with a deep breath. “She's tougher than all of us.” ch.11

“Everything. I want…” his fingers tighten in Hob’s hair, pulling him closer, speaking against his lips. “…Everything.” ch.14

26: Share your favorite detail

how intentionally coy Dream behaves. i love keeping him a mystery and deciding when and how much to allow his intentions to peek through has been so fun lol.

Despair is in fact covered in tattoos and piercings! i say this because i feel like sometimes i forget lmao. (but also her and Hob don't interact much so. my bad haha).

Delirium's constant explosion of color in the way she dresses <3

Hob's dedication to his job, Dream, and the people he cares about the most. i don't care if people think i'm making him too soft and good, im gonna project on that man and make him a sweet, sweet simp lmao

and ah, this doesn't matter anymore, and i kinda regret doing it but. i originally had Dream's favorite bass all black but the pickguard was white. so it actually looked like Jessamy. not gonna lie when @designtheendless drew it all black i decided i liked it better that way. and truly i do. that's when i went back to ch.1 and changed it haha. to actually see the guitar with Dream, all done up sparkling black and purple flecks... gosh it's just so him. but then i got up to the reveal that the guitar's name was Jessamy and i was like, "oh, right." lmao. no one seems to care so i'll leave it be.

27: Share a piece of lore you made up for the story

i have a lot lmao. and this post is already so long... im hoping i can get to some if not all of it in side fics in the future. but for now, here's some that's more like headcanons but:

Dream hates flying. he can full on go into panic attacks on the plane if he allows himself to get into his own head.

this was mentioned briefly in ch.4, while Dream was discussing the formation of the band, but Despair was in another band before joining Endless. she is the only character in the fic who gets to keep her English roots (lol sorry) and is the oldest in the band (30).

all of the band members ages: Dream, Desire, and Death are all 28 and Delirium is 22.

Dream can experience subdrop after going too hard during a performance.

Dream paints his own nails, it's very therapeutic.

as an exercise, i explored my own headcanons for Dream in this verse in a word doc, and one thing i will share from it that you might find interesting: If I were to ever give Dream a theological values, I would describe him as a satanist. He is a physical and pragmatic person, nonconforming, and although he is introverted, he enjoys being a part of a community (he loves his band).

also found this in my notes: How Desire and Dream got along was Death making them fight it out. Hob raises an eyebrow “like in a brawl?” He couldn't imagine Desire throwing hands. “No, in a pillow fight that escalated in hair pulling and verbal taunts.”

fic writer asks

[a-little-bit-of-ravioli]

20 questions for fic writers

Tagged by @the-real-azalea-scroggs! Had to wait until I was of my phone because doing these is a nightmare on mobile lmao

1. How many works do you have on A03?

18 as of a few days ago!

2. What's your total A03 word count?

157,937! Which is. Only a fraction of the word count in my Docs folder. Be prepared.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

I mainly write for The Legend of Zelda; specifically Linked Universe! In fact, that's all that's posted on my Ao3 currently, since my fall into that fandom began with me uploading there! Pre-Ao3 I wrote for Black Cat (Anime/Manga), Megaman NT Warrior, various Pokémon things, Assassin's Creed, Yugioh, Final Fantasy XIV and Octopath Traveler! Some of these I still write privately, but I haven't gotten around to re-posting any.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Whistling on Deaf Ears - My longest fic on Ao3, focusing on Wild and Twilight's friendship and how good intentions can lead to disaster.

Iconoclasm - Warriors deals with the room full of portraits in Cia's palace. The Chain also deals with it, but with a bit more fire.

Deserving - Twilight finally tells Rusl that he was the wolf in the village during TP, but that also means dealing with some heavier topics. Colin half overhears them and forms his own conclusions.

Something Greater - The start of the "Hyrule can see magical auras" series! In this one we deal with Legend and his many rings.

Ocean Magic - Mermaid Legend and Zora Time have a race and then fight one of the Big Octos from WW! Fun times.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Every single one!! I love comments, they give me an excuse to ramble about my fic more!! I am always down to ramble about every single insignificant detail of any line and/or section. If you ever want more background info about one of my fics, look to the comments!

So please, I adore comments, I treat them like treasures, not responding to them would be a CRIME.

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

There's no contest; Inevitable, my (so far) only MCD fic.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Hmmm, that's hard to quantify. I usually try to end fics on a hopeful note regardless. I'd say possibly either Deserving, where Twilight reconnects with his family, or Shimmering Blue, Striking White, where Time meets the Fierce Deity settled down on Satori Mountain and they both get closure.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Thankfully, no! I've been blessed with mostly amazing and patient readers, even when my upload schedule isn't the best.

9. Do you write smut?

No, not really. I've attempted it, but I'm too asexual for it lol

10. Do you write crossovers?

Very, very rarely. Mostly privately, and only very specific ones. Only a single one has had an actual plot, so far (more on that one in question 15!).

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Nope!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Also a nope! I tend to write for smaller fandoms, where these things don't tend to happen a lot!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I have! But it's been a while. Over a decade, in fact! I tried to find the fic to link it here, but it was on the German fanfic website fanfiktion.de, and my friend who posted it back then must have deactivated her account, because it's nowhere to be seen (I still have the Word file though!). It was a Multi-Crossover that started as an RP in a forum, and we took turns turning the RP into prose one chapter each. "If a Hero Turns to Dark" was its title. We were edgy teenagers.

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

Hissssss. Bad question. Shoo. They are all equally important!!

But it's probably TenRose from Doctor Who.

15. What's the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

One of the very few crossovers I've ever worked on; a crossover fic between Assassin's Creed and Doctor Who, that I have mapped out in both chronological and timeline order, and yes, those are different. I only ever wrote about a quarter of it, since my primary audience of it disappeared when we graduated. I doubt I'll ever pick it back up properly, and if I do it'll probably go through heavy rewrites first since it's so old. Finishing it is a nice thought, but realistically, after 9 years it'll never be high priority enough for it to actually happen.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Dialogue, especially arguments, and emotional impact. I've been told I do really well making characters feel alive and believable! Also I like to believe I'm decent at setting a scene and giving it the vibe I want it to have!

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I struggle with dialogue tags when nothing much is happening besides the talking. I always feel it's too bland, and fall back on the same phrases. My scene transitions could use some work too.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I've done this with Japanese phrases, because I was a massive weeb. Usually I followed them up with their own translations, though; I'm not the biggest fan of footnote translations, unless they are properly linked to. Simple dialogue tags are my favourite way of indicating a language switch.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Black Cat the Manga/Anime! It's a series about an assassin turned bounty hunter trying to live a life separate from his murdery past, but getting dragged back into things by still wanting to avenge his best friend's death. The series has a special place in my heart and my bookshelf, it left an imprint on 13-year-old me that will never leave.

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

Probably Jailbreak, uncharacteristically enough! It's one of the only fics I never got stuck in once. Writing it was a great feeling from start to finish. I love writing all of my fics, but that was a special few days.

Tagging @ahrva @nowhere-to-go-but-down @silvercaptain24 and @aeghina! And anyone who wants to do it, really, go wild

[ghostoffuturespast]

WIP Whenever

Tagged by @wanderingaldecaldo @morganlefaye79 @streetkid-named-desire @corpocyborg Thanks y'all! 🧡👻

The writing front has been very slow lately. Ideally I need like 6-8 hour blocks of time to just sit down and write, and my one day to do that has been occupied by social things and appointments the past few weeks. So writing has been minimal and in the tiniest bits and pieces. I do have a pretty solid 10 pages rn though, so I'll take it.

A lot of times for sections with a lot of dialogue, I'll write the dialogue first to make sure I really nail the flow of the conversation then go back and add all the speaker tags and actions. For this snippet I removed my mess of notes about who's saying what, so you all can have fun guessing lol!

One of my fav things to do is incorporate world-building and plot relevant details in as dialogue. It's a really seamless way of informing readers but it's also a subtle form of foreshadowing on my end.

Me and my multi-chapter setups, playin' the long game here...

Wash, sorry in advance for shit talking your woman. I think it's hilarious that Mitch is in on this too though lol

“–Militech’s been awfully agitated lately, saw a twenty vehicle caravan cruising around the 101 on that last scouting trip. Don’t think they’re planning on sniffing around here do you?” “If they were lookin’ for the panzer they would’ve come and collected by now. Think it’s the fact that Arasaka’s stocks are in the shitter. And it ain’t just them either. You know the corps, always tryin’ to sniff out opportunity.” “Yorinobu’s been doing a sloppy job of sweeping this whole debacle under the rug. Ever since he took over it’s been one mistake after another. It’s about time the whole empire toppled.”   “I imagine the president is trying to see how far she can push her luck.” "Don’t think it’ll hurt her chances? Even with it being an election year?" "Pfft, please. There hasn’t been an honest election since [insert date here]" “After her last attempt, you’d think President Myers would’ve learned her fucking lesson by now. Unification my ass.” "Well, with Arasaka hobbled and a newly elected mayor, what better time to test the waters? Militech and the NUSA have all the opening they need to jam their feet in the door." “Ugh, do we really have to talk about corp drama over dinner? Again. That is all you old farts have been talking about recently.” “Seeing as Militech backs the NUSA and that they’re contracted to guard the borders between the NUSA and the Free states. Yes, we are talking about it, Panam. As one of the leaders for this family you should be paying attention to these kinds of things. They are the ones we have to tangle with every time we move." “Yes, because politics is such an influence on all the illegal activities that are our livelihood. Does it really matter which corporation or government is in charge of what? They are all the same. We will figure it out regardless.”   "It helps to know the players on the table. Who they are. What they want. The more information you have the easier it is to navigate the situation, read the field." "As much as I see your point, I was really hoping to avoid the leadership lessons for at least one meal." "It’s not a responsibility you get to turn on and off, Panam." "Well, Saul, any chance those leadership lessons will help sort out the kitchen? It’s been mystery chili for the fifth night in a row."

Also, I found these fun series of videos which are an abbreviated history on NC! If you're into unraveling all the lore like I am or just need something that doesn't require a ton of research, these are great little primer!

Tagging with no pressure: All the people that tagged me @wanderingaldecaldo @morganlefaye79 @streetkid-named-desire @corpocyborg & @shimmer-like-agirl @baublekute @elmknight @mynonsenseistingling @vox-monstera @fly-amanitaa @spacervanguard @scarlettspectra

And it doesn't have to be writing or CP2077 related!

[mrs-theirin]

quilllllll! hi, hello, i simply had to let you know that i've been slowly but surely re-re-rereading the road, the hidden truth, and you, and first of all, gorgeous, beautiful, touching, magnificent, imagine a rainstorm of chefs kisses raining down uponst you <3 but i got curious and had to ask...are there any cut scenes/fun facts/behind the scenes special features you might want to share with the class? 🥺 hehehe i just know /i/ always end up having a bunch of stuff like that once a project's done, and i'd LOVE to hear any juicy tidbits you've got!!! :P (either way, had to remind you how gorgeous this - AND ALL YOUR OTHER WRITING - is!)

we are somehow on the same wavelength as i was rereading it myself when i got this ask.....i'm onto you queenie......

all jokes aside THANK YOU i am always blown away when you compliment my writing, truthfully, it means the absolute world to me and i'm glad you enjoy what i put out. from the bottom of my heart, your support is greatly, greatly appreciated

that being said. well. as far as fun facts go. one fun fact is that this was barely my idea. that's well known at this point i think but you can thank @merrybandofmurderers for originally giving me the idea of a fake dating, roadtrip au. second fun fact is that i winged the HELL out of this fic. 19 years old staying up (apparently, since i checked the outline???) till 5 in the morning trying to get it done. winged the hell out of it. i had a broad idea, but i built the chapters based off of da2 quest names. so like. i had almost nothing planned. i took a da2 quest title i liked and built a modern au plot around it. great idea i think. poor execution LMFAO

no cut scenes or anything due to the rushed and unorganized nature of the original draft. there are things that i cut from the original in my rewrite, but that's because i felt like they weren't serving a real purpose. i also was super excited to change it so it was modern au but with elves and kirkwall and all that stuff. does it make sense orzammar is in new york? no. do i care? also no

i have been intending to write a follow up ever since the ORIGINAL story, but it just hasn't felt right yet. i know i want to do it. and i really hope i will do it. but for now it will stay in my drafts, lovingly titled "trthtay superbowl follow up". between that and the eden/varric wedding at skyhold fic, we could place a bet on which one gets finished first! (psst, it's probably the wedding fic. i've written more for that. unrelated but maybe expect that? soon? ish? don't hold me to that)

anyway, i'd say the biggest thing is that trthtay was my "i can do better" fic, truthfully. i was STUNNED when it got on a screenrant article (before it was even finished too?), i mean, i still have my section printed out in my dresser. it was exciting. but to see so many eyes on something i didn't think was of the quality i'd like it to be was stressful. i wanted to be great. i wanted the thing that so many people saw from me to be groundbreaking. and i really didn't feel like it hit that mark. i don't even think the rewrite hits that mark! there are things that i've written that i feel are better than both. but, there's a bright side to everything, and that's that even what i would consider one of my worse fics was loved. it was loved. it was enjoyed. not only by the author of that article (david caballero, there's nowhere i can message you on that site, but if you ever see this, thank you so so much) but by everyone who decided to click the link and give it a try. by YOU, one of my biggest inspirations and someone whose writing i aspire to match someday. i cannot thank you enough (you, personally, queenie, and you, plural, anyone who's read my writing) for giving me a chance and pushing me to be better

so. anyway. i'm sure you didn't expect your question to get an emotional response, but i think any conversation about trthtay comes back to that. to hope. to gratitude. it truthfully blows my mind that you love it the way you do. thank you thank you thank you. i'm glad i have you in my corner :)

[reallylilyreally]

"A compass and a weapon" for the ask game 👀👀👀

MY BELOVED SIDEQUEST (here)

My favorite scene

Oooosh I have so many from this one!! I remain eternally obsessed with the sequence of Tab making his way back to Easy, in fact the whole section of the attack and aftermath, up to Malarkey realising his boys aren't coming back.

My favorite chapter (if it's a multichapter)

Gotta be the ending. It was SUCH a rollercoaster and has so many little lovely moments and dreadful moments and i had it so clearly in my head the whole time I was writing the rest of it.

Hardest scene to write

Two answers to this...

the entire middle section, because I started writing it with one plot in mind, and halfway through i realised I didn't like/couldn't do that plot, so had to switch it up. As a result, the middle chapters drag like a motherfucker. Someone very kindly pointed that out in the comments, too, which was useful

Don talking to Bill in the truck after they'd rescued Nixon about the whole empty expanse of his life.

Favorite character to write in the fic

OOOOH. Yknow, I think I have to say Harry Welsh. He's just so fucking angry and so fucking scared in this, and it was so much fun to write.

Favorite dynamic to write in the fic

Speirs/Lip/Harry was a DELIGHT in this. those little moments sharing cigarettes, leaning on each other, just... I read them back and kick my feet and giggle.

Why I chose that title

It's a line from Brendan James' track Hero's Song. I *agonised* about it, because it's a very anti-Iraq-war song and though I am obviously also very anti-Iraq-war, I'm coming from a British perspective, and I've been quite anxious about how to approach such a sensitive subject via an American perspective, when I don't have that.

A fun fact about the fic

Started as a throwaway line in "Beyond the Usual", my modern AU - Iraq War fic for The Pacific. And then i made the mistake of asking if anyone fancied a sidequest, and then there we were.

[beatriceeagle]

i wanted to send the part where bren tried to seduce beau and her reaction but it’s a bit longer than 500 words. so instead i’ll ask some questions (though feel free to talk about other aspects!!)

how did you come up with bren thinking that they were romantically involved?

what was beau thinking while they were dancing?

what do you imagine bren’s training was regarding charming and seducing people?

I have a million things to say about this section, so I'm gonna go ahead and give you the full essay, and make sure I answer those questions along the way. Heads up that there is non-graphic discussion of sexual abuse below the cut.

This was a scene that I actually went back and forth on a lot. I wasn't sure I wanted to include it, for a number of reasons: it's very sudden, and doesn't obviously play into the broader plot; it alludes to a very thorny aspect of Caleb's backstory that I knew I wasn't going to have space to fully unpack; and probably most of all, I kind of thought (and still think) that Beau would probably actually be aware of that aspect, so I was kind of suspending my own disbelief by having her go into it blind.

(I could probably have made the scene work even with Beau being aware, but it would have significantly changed the tenor of it. Also, a fun fact about me is that if I really like a joke and think it's in-character, I will fudge other aspects of canon to preserve it, and “If you’re secretly attracted to me, you have to tell me. It’s the bro code, I think," may be my favorite joke in this fic.)

I ultimately kept the scene because it's pulling weight in a lot of different ways. It puts the idea of sexual abuse very vividly in Beau's mind, which helps to prime her for the letter she discovers in the next chapter. It lays groundwork for the Essek plot line. And most importantly, it creates a foundation of trust between Bren and Beau, because Beau establishes a firm boundary in an area that Bren has been taught that his boundaries do not matter, and begins the process of establishing that her friendship and support are not transactional.

The answers to your specific questions, in order:

1. One of the fun parts of the very early chapters for me was digging into Bren's basic (extremely wrong) assumptions about the world. Among other things, it gave me the opportunity to imagine how Beau and Caleb's relationship would look to him, and the idea that he would mistake their relationship for romantic was the first thing I thought of. Their incredible closeness and affection is visibly obvious, and Bren believes them to be partners in capture and interrogation—and he is, after all, in love with both of his capture and interrogation partners.

2. As I said, I think in actual canon Beau would definitely be hearing alarm bells when Bren asked to dance. In this fic, however, she doesn't know about the seduction element of his training, and to her, dancing with Caleb is in no way romantically or sexually charged. It's something they've done many times before (as I allude to in the party at the Lavish Chateau). So Bren asking her to dance probably strikes her as, at worst, an avoidance strategy to deal with his feelings about having seen how different the dance hall looks. Which it is. Just not in the way she thinks.

3. Okay, this is basically all the stuff I didn't have space to unpack in the fic itself. I imagine that Ikithon's training covered, broadly, four subjects: magic (self-explanatory), history (propaganda), interrogation (torture), and spycraft. They all would have overlapped, but those would've been the four big areas. And what Bren thinks of as "spycraft" training was really an exercise in the systematic breaking down of his personal boundaries and sense of self.

Yes, they were taught all the things that Bren mentions when he talks to Beau about spycraft: ingratiate yourself with the subject, find commonalities and leverage, figure out what they want and present it to them. I'm sure they learned a lot about rhetoric and body language and tools of persuasion. But the actual key takeaway of those lessons wasn't any of that: it was that in order to do those things, they should be willing to go to any length, make any sacrifice, and cross any line. Their feelings shouldn't matter; their safety shouldn't matter; certainly the feelings and safety of their targets shouldn't matter. Only the mission should matter.

So I think that the lessons probably involved sexual abuse, not necessarily in the form of sexual contact, but in the form of overt and intentional boundary-pushing on topics of sex and romance. In fact, I think that there was probably overt boundary-pushing on a lot of topics. (I've thought a decent amount about how Eadwulf's religion could be transgressed in similar ways, for instance.) Because ultimately, the primary goal isn't an education on any particular topic; it's the systematic erosion of the concept of boundaries themselves.

[whinlatter]

author's note | chapter 7: caged 🪽

thank you for reading chapter seven of Beasts! this chapter, we see the fallout from the controversial punch, watch harry and ginny go through about ninety bottles of ink writing precisely one bazillion letters to one another (my loves), and fret as the residents of grimmauld place fight a losing battle with pixies that may or may not be a metaphor for our characters’ own multiplying traumas, chasing everyone around and refusing to be contained. pray for our babies, for no-one is thriving - let's chat chapter seven! (plus a sneak peek of chapter eight, which includes a letter from a character yet to make his Beasts debut...) 👀

✨ spoilers for this chapter below the cut  ✨

writing notes and headcanons:

vibes: this chapter, i wanted the vibes to be claustrophobic, tedium, all hogwarts, real focus on ginny and her restlessness and over-it-ness, her starting to write a lot, both to harry and to others, and her starting to push the boundaries and rebel now she's lost her sense of purpose in returning. (@pocket-lilacs brought up pandemic-era uni vibes of 'what is the point of studying when all this is going on' and that is exactly the energy here). the politics is more a backdrop to ginny's arc in this chapter, though the thicknesse trial has uncomfortable echoes for gin's own set of experiences, and i'm having so much fun but also banging my head up against the wall/grappling with turning up/turning down the volume on the different macro/micro plots in different chapters to try and get different effects and to follow ginny's own engagement with the Big Questions of the postwar wizarding world. scale is hard, who knew!

quidditch: by far the hardest part of this chapter to write was the quidditch scene. it was 3000 words long originally, and i had to go at it with a sledgehammer to bash it into bits, dump most of it, and then just keep the most important parts to fold into this much quicker, punchier scene. the worst part of writing is spending days crafting a section and in doing so learn that you don't need it lmao. so yeah that's why this chapter was a week late. this one was a nightmare but we got there in the end lmao

the forest detention: our first flashback to the war year at hogwarts! why haven't we had more? answers on a postcard, all will be revealed, including the context for the silver trio's forest detention, but for now will just say the fact that snape sent the gang into the forest with hagrid for detention after stealing the sword has a) always had me in a chokehold because all of the endless ginny/forest foreshadowing but also because i've never been satisfied with the explanation that the detention was just an obvious easy option. can't wait to share more !!!

harry and ginny: all i want to do is write more letters for those two. 'sneaking out of grounds, booze, leather gangs' - that was how @madammalkins23 summed it up beautifully, getting at the vibes i keep coming back to with both of these characters: the sirius-black-shaped elephant in the room, basically. escaping from hogwarts with buckbeak? the risk being what makes it all fun? harry fixing up the motorbike? fighting a war against grimmauld place and getting on the whiskey? the looming shadow of molly weasley? it's truly giving padfoot. the idea of harry and ginny in cahoots, as partners in crime, really kept me going when writing this chapter - like, what if harry for the first time did have another person in his life who was of the 'fuck it' school of thought? (i even went back and read that jkr short story of sirius and james on the motorbike lol). basically, the sirius echoes just sort of ended up writing themselves, as they always seem to do in this fic. when it comes to the letters, it's striking to me that in canon harry is very preoccupied with who does or doesn’t write to him - at the dursleys', but also after sirius' death ('It’s just hard,' Harry said finally, in a low voice, 'to realise he won’t write to me again.' - HBP). i've never really got fics that have harry as a non-loquacious letter writer in the post-war period, especially to ginny - harry seeks huge comfort and reassurance in getting letters from people who care about him, and channels his worries about people he's close to into letters, especially people he views as family (sirius, ginny). that harry and ginny would become a bit emotionally codependent through letters seemed in some sense a natural choice, basically, and although they're still being very avoidant, in some ways, i think they're building a foundation towards becoming each other's person in ways that's important. (i am putting together a sirius and ginny parallels meta playing with these ideas and character-trait overlap that i'll share hopefully soon, so stay tuned on that one)

why won’t ginny open up? by far the question i've been asked most this week! i am really really excited and happy about the arc i’ve got in store for ginny on this question, so don't want to reveal too much, but there have been some beautiful insightful guesses in the comments section about why ginny is struggling to come clean with harry or her family. here we see harry begin to see through gin's defences, a little bit, but also show his own blindspots that come from him not having asked the right questions or always probed about her interior life before now. i'm always so grateful and blown away by the trust readers have put in me to deliver on all these protracted question marks but this week especially i felt v glad for readers' compassion towards these characters and especially for ginny and hermione, as they fuck up and get it wrong and struggle yet still get grace in the comment section. both are on a journey, but i know more impatient readers could be sick of waiting for them to get there, so just to say i am really glad everyone is getting it and seeing where both characters are at with empathy and kindness, because ofc what they’re both doing is frustrating (and, when it comes to gin, harry is beginning to think so, too)

plus thicknesse: had a long chat with @saintsenara about ol thicknesse, because he's kind of a baffling figure - ex-auror who gets successfully imperiused, becomes minister and then goes on to actively commit horrific war crimes while under yaxley's control. what's fun about the trials, though, is that you can use them as a conduit to raise these big moral questions for postwar wizarding society - in thicknesse's case, it's questions about agency, free will, and culpability, in ways that has real implications for ginny's reflections on her own experiences. so cheers pius love u

harry's patronus: i am salivating at all of your theories for this one - obviously i'm saying nothing for now, but keep them guesses coming, i live for em! and if you guess right, i'll come up with some kind of prize lmao

detention, career advice (and graves' apathy): back in the site of former detentions, ginny shows her remarkably sparse knowledge of wizarding careers in a scene that i hope shows her trying on for size different role models/authority figures and seeing which ones she feels most like. (i like the idea that ginny would actually be a bit interested in being an auror, if only she'd been in of age and able to benefit from kingsley's hiring amesty after the battle). having ginny hover over the idea of being an unspeakable was particularly important for me, because i like the idea of the dept of mysteries being quite a formative space for her (i feel like all i do is say 'wait and see!' but... i have things to do and say with this dimension i swear!) graves is like, do what you want, babe, i don't care. i'm here for the pension, frankly

michael corner: 'surprise bitch!' - michael corner, probably. do i think michael and ginny were mates after the breakup end of ootp? no i do not. but i have always been so struck that ginny and michael must have actually spent a lot of very intense time together during DH as die-hards in the DA (michael is the only character we hear whose torture by the carrows after attempting to rescue a younger student is described as particularly severe, which i think suggests his level of commitment to the cause). readers will recall my open disdain for michael corner up til this point - i have described him as the jack berger of hogwarts quidditch, for my satc fans - but i'm afraid to say i have now decided i quite like him and am excited for him to rock up in person real soon. i think he's a know it all softboi but with a goodie core. also as a writer there's something quite refreshing about bringing in a character who is an ex who probably can see through some of ginny's shit by virtue of having spent a lot of time with her but no longer needing to/caring about impressing her, placating her or keeping her on side lol

hermione: alaskanastro left a comment that summed this up: 'Man, Hermione is really just doubling down on the whole "I'm going to try desperately to control something in life to feel like I'm in control even if it's my friend's life" isn't she? Or at least trying to'. yep, that's what she's doing! we still don't know all that hermione's going through, but this hit the nail on the head fr. i feel bad that this fic is ginny pov at this stage in its arc, because i think ginny sees hermione in a particular way rn (their final conversation in this chapter really speaking to these tensions - ginny does not want to feel mothered, at least not by hermione...), but these two have a long way to go to get to a point of mutual understanding. wanna write a meta on their friendship soon, hopefully will get chance to before i finish chapter 8. but anyway - wonder what's going on with her and ron... hope we find out soon... hope someone tells us... :) :) :)

everything but the ghoul: the dumbest pun, but had to use this joke in a chapter where ginny skips school (everything but the girl's most famous song is called 'missing'... get it)

songs from the playlist for this chapter:

girls getting grouchy and teenage in their feelings is the big ol mood this week:

the middle of the world - nicholas brittell | sidelines by phoebe bridgers | difficult by gracie abrams | simulation swarm by big thief | crisis by elizabeth m. drummond | delete forever - grimes | chinese satellite (copycat killer version) by phoebe bridgers

i did promise a sneak peek didn't i...

From the desk of the MINISTER OF MAGIC Whitehall, London Dear Ginny,  I hope you’re well. I’d like to meet with you on Saturday the 12th of December at 11 o’clock. It’s important that we’re discreet. Please vanish this letter after reading. Sincerely, Kingsley

[im-a-king-baby]

For the Director's commentary: I would love some more background thoughts around chapter 12 when Simon stays overnight with Wille and also cannot sleep and needs the drugs. I've thought about what went through his mind that night...

oh mannn, so I started writing this a while back after someone commented something similar (possibly also you?) and it just kept getting longer and more depressing 😬

Also then my commentary also got long (no surprised there) so it's under the cut, usual TW for talk of addiction.

This is an interesting moment to talk about the writing of because this concept of Simon getting up in the night and phoning Kevan actually came pretty late in editing. The biggest plothole in draft 1 was how everyone found out they were in Bjarstad (there was a fill-in but it didn't really make sense and it was just there to get to the Confrontations which are key to the plot) and I was doing the usual washing-dishes-musing-about-sad-popstars at work when I had the (in hindsight obvious) realisation that Simon does not carry unlimited drugs on his person and would, in fact, be sobering up. He doesn't have a source of drugs in Bjarstad and he's not (at this point) interested in getting sober.

The research I did about cocaine addiction talked about how long term use can affect your ability to feel good things without the drugs. When you've been binging and you stop there's a crash with associated depressive thoughts, anxiety, cravings. It's also a stimulant, so Simon finishes his supply off to try and act like a functional person while Wilhelm is awake, but then he's got nothing to go from the high to sleeping (typically he would also have a downer, eg a sleeping pill or xanax, to end the night on so he could sleep and start again in the morning.) So basically he's lying there, wide awake, he doesn't want to wake Wilhelm up but also his thoughts are spiralling downwards as the happy chemicals drain away.

And then the thoughts start up of 'if I just had a bit more, if I had the pills, I have to get through tonight but also I have to be able to act like a functional human tomorrow when wilhelm wakes up and I don't know where to get anything in Bjarstad and also Simme can't be seen buying drugs in Bjarstad because that would be Bad, but Wilhelm deserves better than me being shitty to him just because I'm sober.'

There is a thing with addiction and rehab about needing to hit rock bottom to make a change, which usually involves being hit by consequences. Simon's position and his team has left him pretty sheltered from the consequences of his addictions (he's always got access to drugs, he's not missing commitments because they're steering him between them, he doesn't have to worry about affording it) but he needed to hit that low moment.

The issue in draft 1 without the phone call was that Candace showed up but nothing had really changed for Simon. She said some crap because she was angry but there was nothing Simon didn't already know (fun fact: I was scrolling through cut sections the other day and some of Candace's lines in C13 are almost word-for-word matches to lines I took away from Simon in the hotel room (they worked as his thoughts but it didn't fit to have him saying them out loud).). So the existence of the phone call, and the way it roped Wilhelm in when part of wanting the drugs was to stop Wilhelm from seeing how Simon felt sober ('I just want you to be happy' - Wilhelm, chapter 16) was this consequence that Simon was suddenly faced with.

And in a way, it had already been solved. Candace had already bribed the hotel, she's very accustomed to covering up this kind of fuck-up, but for Simon the reality of how close he came to hurting Wilhelm was definitely part of the catalyst to 'this isn't working, something has to change here.' (Then add on all the shit Candace says when Simon is too tired/depressed/sober to fight back (which again Simon would not take anywhere near as hard if Wilhelm hadn't been there to see it because what Wilhelm thinks of Simon matters a lot more than what Simon thinks of Simon))

But now I am jumping ahead to C13, sorry! In the night, he's not thinking that far ahead. He's thinking there is a phone right there, he can figure out the hotel and remember Kevan's room number, drugs will arrive and he'll take them and in the morning he'll get to smile and kiss Wilhelm more and *handwave* things will work out. There is no long term plan beyond getting something to smooth off the edges of his brain, and there's not even a real plan for how to do that (do not ask your employees to uber you drugs, folks). He's desperate, he's depressed, and he's hoping someone else will fix it because someone else (cough Candace cough) has always fixed it.

And then he finds a bottle of wine at the back of the cupboard and drinks the whole thing so that he can at least finally fall asleep.

I have no idea what I'm going to do with the whole depressing sprawl of a scene, but here is a Simon POV extract for you:

Then Wilhelm yawns, nudging Simon back and rolling onto his side, the invitation to cuddle up clear, and this was why Simon finished the coke, wasn’t it? Just because his blood is racing and his heart is pumping doesn’t mean he can keep Wilhelm awake trying to explain why it wasn’t okay to go further before but it is now because Simon is okay now, and trying to explain why he’s okay without Wilhelm asking questions or turning on the light. So he rolls onto his side while Wilhelm wraps an arm around his shoulders and tries to still his racing thoughts, tries to focus on something that isn’t how much he wants to turn back, capture Wilhelm’s mouth with his. He runs through songs in his head. Not his own - not the ones he has etched into his bones - but the songs they used to sing as children. There’s nothing like a love song, his mama used to say, on the nights when Micke wasn’t home until late and they could turn the radio up and dance around the living room. There’s a song about staying awake, just to hear you breathing. There’s a song about finding love in a hopeless place. There’s a song that goes I’ve hungered for your touch, a long lonely time. “All the great love songs are sad,” Simon finds himself saying. Wilhelm’s forehead presses against the back of his neck, his breath is warm on Simon’s skin. “Write one for me,” he says. Simon thinks about standing in a recording booth singing Hold on to every moment ‘til I find you, or Que hermoso es ser amado, or I’d want to feel like that. Imagining Wilhelm’s arms around his waist, Wilhelm’s eyes watching him from across the room. ‘Who do you think about when you sing the love songs?’ Laura had asked, not even twenty four hours ago. Simon closes his eyes, counts Wilhelm’s breaths as they settle out waits until Wilhelm must be asleep before letting himself reply. “They’re all for you.”

[combeferres-mothematics]

barricade day fic!!!!!!?? ?? tell us moooore

😭😭😭 The fact that this appeared in my inbox less than a minute after I reblogged that is greatly amusing to me.

So, the basic plot of the fic is Les Amis die at the barricade, then wake up in modern times. I'm not sure whether to call it time travel or reincarnation, so I've just been referring to it as a bit of both. Because they definitely died, that's very much a thing that happened, but they're also waking up in in the 21st century as adults, full memory of what happened at the barricade and before, and they have never seen a lot of the 21st century stuff. (I am having So. Much. Fun. with this plot point and I've barely even written anything in the 21st century 😭I need to finish the 19th first aaaaaahhhhhh)

The first nine chapters are each from the POV of one of the boys covering the events of the barricade, from them heading down the street after the funeral (Or, in JBR's case, Preliminary Gaieties), to their deaths, and then a short snippet from when they first wake up in the 21st century.

In the 21st century they're also split up into different cities, I have them two to a city at first, aside from Feuilly Yes, I know I am slightly evil who's alone. Of course, they may not be close to each other in the city, but the pairs will run into each other by chance, aside from ExR, who are much closer than the others (They died holding hands, so I factored that into the time travel logistics)

I haven't decided on the places they'll be quite yet, but I do have my pairs mapped out. :D

Bahorel and Prouvaire are together, as are Courfeyrac and Bossuet, and Combeferre and Joly.

This is so far what I have, (Yes, this is how I realized that Courfeyrac dies 5th out of 9th of the Amis). The Chapters for Bahorel, Prouvaire, and Combeferre are finished, and Enjolras needs one more scene that I have to choose. (I have too many options and not enough room)

And the word count is only counting the words in the actual chapters, with the scenes for later chapter's I have written, I'd say I'm about 11,000 words so far. They're all contained in the 'snippets' section of the document though because I'm trying to finish these nine before adding more.

But alas, Combeferre accidentally terrorizing people by being WAY too excited about their digital camera is much too funny not to write now. (In context he is also still very much in the clothes he wore at the barricade at that point, and they are none too pretty... 😭)

[kindatired]

Genshin Impact: First Impression

I know, "You just NOW getting into Genshin after four years?'

Well, I didn't want to play on my phone so I waited to buy a laptop. I did bought a MacBook for school but then I found out that even though this game runs on IOS it doesn't run on MacOS...

(I should've known since the game isn't on the Switch...

Why most of the games I want to play isn't playable on the devices I have- Anyways back to the point.

I just finish Mondstadt in Genshin and so far I really like the story which makes me excited for what they have in store in Liyue. So this is all my thoughts about the first Archon quest, all in one go.

This chapter was a nice introduction to the world of Tevyat and I like how we already have to worry about two antagonistic groups (The fatui and Abyss Order)

Matter of fact let me list down how I think of each character:

The traveler:

I wish they have more character to them especially during the cutscenes. Despite being the protagonist I feel like they’re just in the backseat most of the time with the exception of them needing to action scenes. (Due to this my version of the traveler is that they're snarky but their heart is in the right place.) But I like how they showed us what the other sibling is doing because most stories they will have it a mystery right before the final arc

Paimon:

She’s cute but also WHERE IS HER PARENTS? At the start, she said that she was saved from drowning and I was like “Who was watching you?? Do you have any friends or anything?” I truly believe she will be a plot point in the story considering she can float around and have a space aesthetic to her

Venti:

I really like how mysterious he was at the start of the story and then later we see how much of a doofus he is. (Not saying he's dumb but carefree) Despite not wanting to be a ruling god, he still cares for his city in his own way. I don’t know why but if you mix Pit and Palutena together and then boom there’s Venti.

Amber:

I love her design so much. It's simple yet effective especially with the red bow. I feel like the team knew this too which is why she comes with her own plushie which is so freaking cute! Her character quests is fun too when she taught us to get our own glider's license. I don't know why but she gives the first classmate you befriend in class energy (Probably because she is the first person beside Paimon that we met in the game)

Kaeya:

I’m down bad I like how he has a laidback personality yet he’s always behind the scenes. Despite the front he puts up, you know he’s doing something else. Kind of wish we get to see more of him but I’m satisfied with what we got

Lisa:

At first I thought she was going to be a flirt she kinda is But I found it funny how she’s has a “I don’t have time with this bs” attitude on her side quest but still have a lot of patience for people's BS at times. I can't exactly remember but I think when she was trying to find all the overdue books, she went "I might as well make it fun" and brought the traveler and Paimon along too.

Jean:

Once I take a step back and think of all the things she had to deal with during this arc, it was definitely something. Abyss Order, The Dragon, The Fatui and trying to keep the citizens calm. She doesn’t get enough credit where it’s due. There's this one line delivery in the English version, I can't exactly point out when but it was about how the Fat couldn't get the upper hand in the situation. I don't know why but her tone of voice was passive aggressive, like she was praying on their downfall.

Diluc:

Mix opinions on him due to him sending us to find four of those ice flowers and I had to spend a hour and thirty minutes trying to find the fourth one. So yeah I have bitter feelings about that Serious note, he's probably my favorite character in Mondstadt if we're not including Amber and Kaeya. Bro is the Batman of the game, they even call him the Dark knight

Abyss Ice Mage:

Yeah I dedicated a whole section to this NPC because Imagine being electrocuted by Lisa and flamed by Diluc within a week. Like bro was put in the wringer (rightfully so). Kinda hoped they appear in the future story so this trend of Ice Mage being comedically abused continues.

My thoughts of the story:

I thought the first archon quest of the story is neat. It has nothing too spectacle as it works as a exposition to the world of Teyvat and it done that job very well.

The twist of knowing where the traveler's sibling is doing was definitely something I never thought would happen. Usually in most stories, they would have the sibling in prison but nope.

Your sibling is doing fine just helping out the big bad organization that is trying to destroy Teyvat.

Now this may be a reach but I like how each character has the freedom of accomplishing their goals by their own way.

First you have the traveler, by default they have the freedom of not being born in Teyvat as they are not from this world. Because of this, they have the ability to use more than one element. Another note is that because the traveler isn't bound by the nation's rules as they wasn't raised in Teyvat, they're always the person with a third option, sort of like a spectator...

is this why they're so quiet? So he can hear the opinions of others before making their own conclusions???

Paimon also has freedom as she doesn't have a parental figure which allows her to tag along, traveler on their quests.

Moving on to the people of Mondstadt, even within the Knights of Favonius who are under strict codes, handle tasks using their own method.

Example of this is the uniforms.

While Amber, Lisa, Kaeya, and Jean share the same motifs as being in the same group, their uniforms are completely different. You know how in magical girl shows, where you have sailor moon, where every soldier wears the same design but different color palette? Then there are other shows like Magica Madoka, where the girls where completely different outfits? The knights of favonius fits the latter, with the exception of the NPCs.

Even the way they handle tasks are different. Amber make sure she does her best to follow the rules but with a bit a flare. Lisa is a tad strict but her approach is passive. Kaeya always tries to find a loophole in the situation to see the whole picture. (Example: Him "staying behind" in the city, to get more information about the Abyss Order). Jean who follows the rules, but know there are times when the rules have to be bend.

Then you have the outliners like Diluc and Venti who are not apart of the knights. Diluc doesn't trust the knights to completely solve the problem so he acts as a vigilante, to pick up the pieces they fail to notice.

Venti who is the god of freedom, decided to not rule his region like the other archons. Instead, he watches it from afar, like the guardian he is, and steps in when the time is right.

All these characters are different in one way or another but they all come together to work together because they all share a common goal. Still even if you do things your own way, you still have to bear the responsibility of your actions.

Venti was too nonchalant in his approach of protecting his region which resulted in a Harbinger, La Signora, taking his Gnosis.

I say he was nonchalant because he was focus on the current problems of his country, which was storm bringer, and not future problems such as the Fatui. Because he wasn't focus on them, he let his guard down when the problem with storm bringer was solved.

I know this may be a stretch and I'm just writing what pops up in my head but that's what I got from the message of the archon quest.

Speaking of La Signora, how the hell did no one saw her attacking Venti and traveler or at the very least heard it? I know Barbara did but you're telling me that only ONE person heard that shit?!

So after talking to Venti it appears that we have to go to every seven regions to find the traveler's siblings. Or in this case, try to convince them to not destroy this world.

The fuck do we look like Pokemon Trainers?... Because I can sing the theme songs if you want

Either way, I had fun with the story. Gamplay-wise... I'm not really much of a gamer myself. I don't go into the mechanics of the game.I play fighting game, barely knowing the combos and just smash buttons to win

However, I can say the gameplay of Genshin is easy to get into. Unfortunately, it's a rpg so I have to farm for materials... yay, I guess. But it's not as bad as Fate Grand Order, Fate grand order farming system is a shit storm especially considering how it's a turn based but doesn't have a auto-farm system.

(for those who want to get into the story of FGO, just look it up on Youtube, do not play the game. )

When exploring, I often hesitate of where I go, because the game doesn't want you to explore said region yet, They will send Paimon telling you "Let's explore that later" only to yeet you off the cliff.

Speaking of Gameplay Paimon, she always setting us up. There was this purple spot, and she told us to blow it away to see what it is, only for it to be the eye of the storm... Its not like it was hard but it was annoying to fight it.

At least she let us control the time though.

Overall, I had fun with the game, I'm looking forward for Liyue and thank you for reading all of this as I was writing as I go so I know there is MANY grammar errors in this review.

Can't wait for Liyue because then I will get to see the character that convinced me to play the game.

[kvetchinglyneurotic]

Now that The Hedgehog's Dilemma is officially complete and posted, it's time for some housekeeping! List of sections under the read more because it turned out very long:

the sappy bit where I say thank you

overview of part 2, aka the fluffy sequel

side stories in the same universe (you can make a request!)

tagging, updates, and extremely tentative timeline

Also: to the person who sent a rose to my inbox a few days ago — I do accept them and you'll be getting the inaugural rose snippet for the sequel!

1: The Sappy Bit Where I Say Thank You

As I've alluded to before, writing THD was a new experience in a lot of ways: it's my first and (currently) only fanfic, but also the first time I've written a character study or anything with such a focus on hurt/comfort and interpersonal relationships. It's also the first time I've written something that has a real audience — I come from the wilds of writing plotty fantasy/sci-fi original fic — and posting something that I knew would probably get some kind of reception was both exciting and terrifying. I appreciate everyone who has read, kudos'd, commented on, sent asks about, or otherwise interacted with the fic so much; you've all been lovely and I hope you enjoyed reading THD as much as I enjoyed writing it.

2: Flightless Birds (aka the Fluffy Sequel)

Flightless Birds, the second fic in the series Symbiosis, is set during the off-season between season 1 and season 2. Here's an overview of the main character arcs/plot threads (no spoilers for chapter 6):

Jamie: our boy is going through it slightly less than in part 1! With the James Tartt Sr. situation resolved, he spends the fic processing his trauma without the looming specter of his father's reappearance, which basically takes the form of 1) therapy, 2) looking after Roy post-injury, 3) extensive platonic cuddling (fun fact: I hadn't really written any cuddling scenes before THD and am not at all a cuddler in real life, so hopefully those bits are like. at least somewhat plausible), and 4) visiting his mom and Simon.

Roy: our boy is going through it slightly more than in part 1! (sorry, Roy) Like in canon, he's recovering physically from his knee injury and processing the end of his career, which is not great for those underlying self-worth issues. In addition to experiencing the mortifying ordeal of letting himself be cared for, he's also experiencing the mortifying (and for him, more upsetting) ordeal of not being able to care for others the way he wants to — the worst of his physical recovery coincides with the point where Jamie's very shaken and vulnerable from the events of chapter 6, and he basically has to contend with the fact that he not only needs to expand his own support network but that he can't be the entirety of Jamie's support network.

Keeley: our girl has been upgraded to main character! She moves in with Roy — and by extension, Jamie — and, as the only one of the three who's not freshly injured and/or traumatized, initially ends up with a lot of the caretaking work. This is a problem because a) Keeley needs her space and has trouble expressing her needs at the best of times, and b) doesn't strike me as someone who has a particular inclination towards what I guess I'd call protracted caretaking — she can be really good at comforting people in the moment, but I think she panics a bit when it's a more serious situation that she doesn't know how to solve (like with Jamie's depressive spiral in 3x11) and prefers relationships — both romantic and platonic — where there's a decent degree of autonomy: everyone likes spending time together, but they can all also do their own thing. This is part of the catalyst for the aforementioned expanding of support networks.

A note on relationships: Roy and Keeley are technically dating but I'm very aromantic and have like. sub-zero interest in or knowledge of how to write romantic relationships, so in a reverse-shipper move, I'm going to write it as platonic. Whether or not the fact that I've hit everyone with the aro beam will be discussed in-text remains to be seen.

3: Side Stories

There are some POVs and events that happened off-screen and/or during the time skips that didn't make it into THD for a variety of reasons. I have vague plans to turn some of these into fics, such as: Ted's POV of the first couple of chapters before he became a main character; Nate's extremely complex feelings about the intersection of his and Jamie's trauma, his relationship with Ted, and the evolution of AFC Richmond that I couldn't figure out how to include in the main fic without making the whole thing feel a bit unfocused; and Jamie's probationary period with the team during the time skip between chapters 2 and 3. If there's anything you'd like me to write about in this universe, feel free to make a request!

4: Tagging, Updates, and Timeline

Posts about the series, including the individual fics, will be tagged as series: symbiosis (I am planning to go through my THD posts to add this tag, but no promises as to when that will happen)

Posts about individual fics will be tagged as fic: title; e.g. fic: the hedgehog's dilemma or fic: flightless birds

Timeline: I'm going to plot out all of part 2 before I start writing, which probably won't take a hugely long time. However, November is a bit of a busy month and I'm going to be fiddling around with different strategies for working on multiple fics at once — I'm excited to get started on part 2 but I also miss working on my original fiction project — so it might be a bit of a wait before I get that done. (If anyone has advice or techniques for doing this, send it my way! (only if you feel like it, of course))

Updates: I'll continue posting writing updates when I have them, and of course I'm always happy to answer asks or otherwise chat with people about the fic (or anything else)

[8bitsupervillain]

Higurashi When They Cry Hou Ch. 7 Minagoroshi pt. 10

Come to think of it, this is probably the most emotion we've seen Rika display in any of the arcs up to this point. Also, this section shows that Shion Sonozaki might actually be dumber than Keiichi.

I wonder if Japan has a fundamentally different interpretation of what a witch is compared to your more traditional European style witch? Or maybe I'm just woefully out of touch in that regard and the idea of a witch being basically immortal is the more commonly accepted idea.

Hanyuu and her nice new bag of I told you so's. Now, I know I've said this before in regards to the characters in the past, but Rika is such a dramatic child. She suffers one singular misfortune and she writes off all of her accumulated good luck as just gone forever. I'm not saying she's wrong for feeling that way, I'd be lying if I said I never experienced days where if one single thing went wrong I would start thinking everything was ruined forever. I'm just saying she's been such a rather optimistic character lately that this change to complete and utter defeatism is kind of darkly funny.

If Rika gives up and loses her last shreds of hope and becomes something that's no longer Rika, does that mean that Hanyuu was born from a similar situation? They've said multiple times that she's existed for a lot longer than Rika, so was Hanyuu formerly a human? I don't know if that's the case at all, but it's a fun little thought experiment I think.

Skipping ahead a little, Rika goes to school the next day in the vain hopes that Satoko will be there as well. When she's not she let's her despair takes over and starts being Rude Rika, telling Chie to shut up and she's going home. Chie then takes this thoroughly morose Rika to the teachers office and gets the skinny from Rika about how Teppei has come back and is basically making her life a living hell.

The rest of the main cast eavesdrop and overhear about Satoko's situation.

Say what you will about Keiichi, and I have, at length, and will again. But at least when he decided to plan, and then carry out a murderous plot he at least had the good sense to not scream it out loud in front of witnesses. Sure, everyone knew anyway because despite the idea that people remember the past arcs has only really become a thing as of Tsumihoroboshi everyone somehow knows everything everyone has ever done in this series.

Wanting to put a delay on Tatarigoroshi: Shion Edition Chie drives off to Satoko's home. Would Tatarigoroshi: Shion Edition give her the ability to kill people with her mind, do you think? I think it would. Anyway, she arrives at Satoko's house and is immediately screamed and shouted at by Teppei. Upon being yelled at that yes she's here, no you can't see her, she's just sick, trust me Chie goes back to the school.

Shion rants and raves at Chie's uselessness in this scenario and once again talks about "come on guys, murder!"

Rena proves once again to be the brains of this outfit, because honestly, if you're gonna kill the guy just do it, don't yell and scream about it. Shion decides the next logical course of action is to beat anyone who gets in her way with a chair. Which she does. She smacks Keiichi around with the chair until he convinces her to quit giving him brain damage and to calm down for a second.

Something that I like so far in this chapter is the fact that the TIPs are back to being more than just documents. I recall in chapter one the TIPs would have these extra documents yes, but it also had scenes like Rena and Mion talking secretively about how Ooishi is a servant of Oyashiro and the like. Then up until Minagoroshi here, the TIPs were all just extra lore building documents. So it's neat to see them go back to extra scenes and actions outside of the main narrative.

I'm trying to be more upfront with what I like so far with this chapter, because in very short order I won't have much positivity about it. Once the narrative switches back to Keiichi as the viewpoint I had a pretty miserable time of it, up until it switches back to Rika's perspective.

[idontknowreallywhy]

Best Jupidad Moments #7 Nevermoor Ch 10 - Everyday Highs and Weak-Moment Lows

This chapter contains one of my favourite but underrated Jupidad moments and also the one where I think for the first time he properly gets it wrong and the fandom gasps in dismay…

(NB Altho this chapter also contains some excellent Jove one-liners, I’ll restrict myself to the parenting angle for this post and save the general Jupiter North fangirling for another day ;-) )

Kedgeree had fetched Jupiter and Morrigan from the Smoking Parlour, where they sat in a cloud of forest-green vapour (rosemary smoke: for sharpening the mind), playing a game of cards. Neither was certain of the rules, but Frank whispered advice in Morrigan’s ear, and Dame Chanda did the same for Jupiter, and every now and then someone would yell ‘Huzzah!’ and the others would scowl or throw something, and all things considered Morrigan thought it was a pleasant way to spend an afternoon. They both felt a bit put out when Kedgeree insisted they hurry to the foyer.

Although the dramatic moments are important, so much of the Jupiter-Mog relationship would have been built in the little everyday moments which wouldn’t normally make it into a novel. It’s awesome that Jess shoehorns this section in at this point because, although it doesn’t seem to add much to the ongoing plot, it gives so much more depth to the interactions between these 4 people who live together than such a short paragraph should. I’m so glad it survived the edit and would love to see more of these moments in future.

What’s special about it from a Jupidad angle?

First - they are equal parties here - this isn’t Jove in teaching mode, he’s as clueless about the card game as Morrigan and they are just having some nonsensical fun.

Second - remember that Nevermoor is written entirely from Morrigan’s POV - so how do we know they BOTH felt a bit put out unless he told her? I just love the fact that he’s either said or has otherwise made it clear from his expression or body language that he’s annoyed to be pulled away from that time they were having together. 

Hopefully to most children, the knowledge that their parents enjoy their presence wouldn’t be a surprise but to Morrigan who has been constantly told she is a burden by her parents and grow up accepting the fact that *everyone* avoids being around her… it’s a big deal.

I wonder if that is why this section is here? The biggest threat to her safety both physical (because she might literally be killed if deported) and mental (because her anxiety about it lurks in her mind disrupting her peace for the following 8 months or so) since she arrived in Nevermoor is about to intrude on her day. When a person looks back on life-changing moments like that, I think it’s quite common that they might hyper-focus on the ordinary moments that immediately precede the bombshell.

‘What’s the Stink doing here?’ Jupiter murmured to Kedgeree, who shrugged as he scooted off behind the concierge desk. ‘Who’s the Stink?’ whispered Morrigan. ‘Ooh – ah, I meant the Nevermoor City Police Force,’ Jupiter said under his breath. ‘We, er – probably shouldn’t call it the Stink. Not to his face. Actually, just let me do the talking.’

Another favourite moment because every parent has done this where they say or do something mildly inappropriate and then realise kiddo is paying rapt attention and they remember EVERYTHING… especially what you don’t want them to. That “Ooh - ah” is so familiar it cracks me up every time.

It happens again when Morrigan repeats his joke from a few weeks prior to the officer…

And where exactly are you from, Morrigan Crow?’ 

‘Nunya,’ replied Morrigan.

Jupiter tried to turn his snort of laughter into a cough. ‘She meant to say she’s from the Seventh Pocket of the Free State, Inspector. She just … pronounces it funny.’ 

The other thing to note about Jupiter’s conversation with Flintlock is that he is very polite, cool, “serene” when he is personally threatened with trouble and manages to remain calm and quiet even while pointing out the officer’s appalling lack of compassion. However, the icy voice appears as soon as Morrigan is insulted:

‘But I think you might find this scummy illegal of yours is more trouble than she’s worth.’ Jupiter looked him dead in the eye. ‘Don’t call her that.’

A chill crept up Morrigan’s spine. She recognised the cold wrath in Jupiter’s voice, the ice in his hard blue eyes. Flintlock, however, wasn’t so quick to catch on.

The staff of the Deucalion then intervene (hilariously) so we don’t know how things would have gone, but he takes the opportunity to pause and then come back with a well considered answer.

Jupiter was silent for some time, while Flintlock shot nervous looks in the Magnificat’s direction. When Jupiter finally spoke, it was in a quiet, measured voice. ‘You have no right to demand the papers of someone who falls under the jurisdiction of the Wundrous Society, Flintlock.’

But then he messes up big time, as we all do sometimes when really stressed or knocked off kilter…

Morrigan turned to Jupiter, who looked as tense as she’d ever seen him. ‘Can they really kick me out?’ she asked, a lump forming in her throat. She thought of the Hunt of Smoke and Shadow, of its black shapeless form looming in the darkness. The back of her neck felt prickly and cold. ‘What happens if I have to leave Nevermoor?’ ‘Don’t be silly, Mog,’ Jupiter said bracingly. ‘That’s never going to happen.’

He left the foyer without looking at her.

Argh, argh, argh. First, he calls her very-valid-and-legitimate concern “silly”… and then he leaves without looking at her - that last line is devastating. And it gets its own paragraph just to underline it.

This was a moment where she needed, if not detailed answers, then compassion, understanding, some of that Jupidad eye contact… she needed to know SHE wasn’t the problem and that even if he can’t tell her exactly what it is yet, he has a plan that will mean the threat won’t materialise and that she can trust him.

If this had gone differently, how would it have changed the rest of the book? Would her Fright Trial have been the same, Would she have made the decision she did on Christmas evening? Would Mr Jones have got under her skin and messed with her trust in Jupiter quite as much?

One of the things I find most anxiety-inducing about being a parent is that you can get things right 99% of the time and then say something stupid in a moment of weakness and… ugh what if they remember that more than the rest? What if that damages your relationship forever? What if after all that effort to try to do things right you still mess your kid up anyway? Personally I just apologise a lot and try to make sure that are so many more times she can remember feeling loved and trusted etc that the slip ups get crowded out. Thankfully, kids are usually better at being cool with the fact people make mistakes all the time and they get over it faster than us more introspective angst-ridden adults do.

It’s encouraging that our Jupidad doesn’t get it right all the time. If even fictional super-parents can get it wrong and bounce back, so can I. And it’s obviously way more interesting to read - even brilliant humans are human -and one of the great things about Jessica’s characters is that she shows over and over that they are really human, you feel like you know them, and that’s what makes this series so utterly compelling.

[violencewithwings]

February 2024 reading wrap-up

I’d like to say it was the lack of boy shenanigans that made me read a lot more this month, but that simply wouldn’t be true. I might’ve sobbed my eyes out when I found out the guy I liked was in fact in a relationship. Fun! I still like him, though...I cannot escape it.

Books read ˋ°•*⁀➷ 9

Books DNFed ˋ°•*⁀➷ 2

Five-star books ˋ°•*⁀➷ 6

The Night Circus - Erin Morgenstern

February 1st, ⭐️⭐️⭐️, DNF

Ok so this book was like…SUPER disappointing? I read it expecting to love it because it just had that kind of vibe…and it was just so interesting. For one, the book had no actual chapters but instead section headings? There were no chapter numbers. Very odd. Also, the characters felt so distant. I think I read a good 60-70 pages of this book and I felt absolutely NOTHING for our two main characters. I probably would recommend this book if you like boring bored, idk

The Cruel Prince (reread) - Holly Black

February 11th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

This is my second full read of this book, and I have to say, this book is a lot better read as a politically-based plot instead of a romance. Don’t get me wrong, I love the way the romance builds in this series, but it’s a lot easier to enjoy when you’re not anticipating anything happening in Jude’s love life. I read this book originally after hearing rave reviews about the romance in it, and while I’ll say those reviews were not wrong, it was frustrating to read almost the entire book with absolutely no romance whatsoever.

There is so much to love about this book. Jude is a very compelling main character, and, despite being a little insane, she’s a very lovable main character. She’s very bold and passionate, but she’s not just a one-dimensional character. It’s very easy to get into her head and understand how her brain works, and seeing the adventures she goes on is thrilling.

There’s not much in the way of major side characters for the first two thirds of this book, and I found that I actually don’t mind it. Jude is a very entertaining and interesting character on her own that she doesn’t really need supporting characters to help carry a scene.

Cardan is not a major character in this book, but I adore him at every turn anyways. Once he stops playing the antagonist, almost every line he delivers is incredible, and I absolutely love the way he speaks. The way that he and Jude banter closer to the end of the book leaves me with anticipation for what’s to come in their romance (even though I’ve already read it!) Their chemistry builds with each scene they share, and I have to say that their relationship is definitely my favorite part of the book.

The Wicked King (reread) - Holly Black

February 12th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

This book was as fun as I remember it being. It begins five months after the events of the last book, and Jude hasn’t found a way to get along with Cardan just yet. Seeing the two of them dance around each other and pretend their chemistry is hatred is uproariously funny, and the way that they speak to each other throughout this book is absolutely lovely to read.

But don’t be fooled, this book is not mostly romance. Jude plays her role as the true ruler of Elfhame, and while doing so, she leaves Cardan out of the loop quite a bit. The two of them fight quite a bit because of this, and while this isn’t the main conflict of the book, it fed into it quite a bit.

The number of parties in this book had me absolutely feral, and I love to see Jude and Cardan dance together. Both times they danced were unlikely circumstances, and the dance they had near the end of the book…ooh. That scene is one of my absolute favorite scenes in this entire series. The way the two of them finally (sort of) let the other in after that scene too? UGH. It makes me go insane.

This book certainly did NOT suffer from middle book syndrome, and after recently reading a book that most definitely did, I am extremely grateful. Honestly, this book might be my favorite of the three, but I’m only about a quarter of the way through Queen of Nothing, so we’ll see how I feel in a few days when I finally get around to finishing it.

The Roommate Pact - Allison Ashley

February 15th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I’ll be honest, this book was kind of fun trash. Don’t get me wrong, it was a good book, but there was just something about it that gave me the vibe that I was reading book junk food. The characters were fun, the trauma was well-written, and the plot was good and probably realistic for two people in their mid-thirties.

One gripe I had with it was that half the time the characters felt like teenagers, though. If I wanted to read a book about teenagers, I’d read about teenagers. It was very odd to read about an NP and a firefighter and then have them act like 16-year-olds.

Overall, it was a pretty easy read and I had a good time, so I’d say it was worth it. It was the book I read on my Kindle while I was taking baths for this month, so…🤷🏻‍♀️ it was good bath reading or something.

The Titan’s Curse - Rick Riordan

February 17th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

We’re finally back on the Percy Jackson grind! After waiting a month…because two people at the library refused to turn their books…(I kind of hate the new library policies, but I digress).

This book was just…fun! I find it interesting that despite this series following a linear and connected storyline, it doesn’t seem to have a distinct vibe. Each book I read in this series is extremely separate from the last in the terms of the feeling the world gives me, and it’s actually quite enjoyable!

This book brought a bunch of new characters into the mix and deepened our understanding of the world and the characters within it, and I really enjoyed that! It was also an extremely easy read after reading YA/NA fantasy for the past few months, so that was really nice. I was a bit horrified to look up the Heroes of Olympus after reading this and realize all of those books are between 500 and 600 pages, but we’ll leave that problem for when we get there.

Kissing Kosher - Jean Meltzer

February 18th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️

Honestly, this book was a huge disappointment. After how much I loved this author’s other book, The Matzah Ball, I expected to love this one too, but I just didn’t find myself as in love with the characters. It was just kinda…meh.

The Queen of Nothing (reread) - Holly Black

February 19th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

This book was a masterpiece from start to finish. Watching Jude weasel her way back into the kingdom and spy on her enemies was so much fun!

Of course, it wouldn’t be the final book in a fantasy series without a bit more romance. Jude and Cardan finally confessed their feelings to each other, albeit in a bit of a roundabout way at first. The rising romantic tension between the two of them throughout this book was definitely the best part of it. I especially enjoyed watching Jude’s feelings for Cardan snowball as she realized how much she really loved him.

The entire main plot of this book was AMAZING. I really appreciated the way Cardan finally proved himself as king in the latter half of the book, and I loved watching him grow in his confidence over the throne. he and Jude both seemed to grow into their roles quite a bit more in this book as well as proving themselves as spies.

Overall, I don’t really think any review I could write could do this book justice. I think it is probably my favorite book in the entire series, though the second book is a CLOSE second.

The Battle of the Labyrinth - Rick Riordan

February 21st, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

SO much happened in this book, and despite the fact that not as much happened plot-wise as I expected, it was a great read. Some of my favorite characters from past books were brought back for this book’s quest, and so much happened between the characters in this book.

One thing I was super excited about in this book is that Percy and Annabeth’s relationship is finally going somewhere. I love how slow this slow-burn is, but I can’t wait to see Percy finally realize how he feels about her.

One thing I have to say about this series is that while it deals with dark themes, it doesn’t feel nearly as dark and creepy as HP did when I got to book five (sorry, HP lovers! That series got creepy after book four!) and I really appreciated that. Nothing about this book was creepy enough for me to want to put it down, and that was refreshing.

The Last Olympian - Rick Riordan

February 22nd, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I definitely didn’t read this in one night. I swear. It totally didn’t happe-

This book was a completely different experience from the other four. It was essentially one big battle, and usually I don’t like reading battles, but this one was exciting to read. It brought back ALL the characters, liked or not, and it was so much fun.

We got to meet quite a few of the gods in this book, and that was fun. We also got a Hades cameo, which was awesome after not seeing him for…what…four books? Three? I don’t even remember anymore. We also got a lot more about little Nico, and I love him, so that was very enjoyable for me.

Percy and Annabeth finally got together!!!!! Yippee!!!!

…

THAT’S IT????

BYE

Eyyyy I did it! I actually read a bunch of books this month! I'm actually currently in the middle of reading three other books...and once The Prisoner's Throne shows up, I'll CERTAINLY be reading that. I have spring break in two weeks, so hopefully I'll read quite a bit more then, too. Happy leap day and see you next month!

[stillthewc]

YEAR OF THE FANGAN - APRIL EDITION

ꕥ DANGANRONPA: DECEPTION EXAMINATION ꕥ

Ah, Instaronpas. Despite Instagram not being very conducive to hosting fangans imo (unless I'm doing things wrong, navigating to older posts is generally a pain / it's very easy to spoil plot points by doing so), the slideshow formatting makes for a very unique type of experience, and the fandom-centric stories I've read on there (aka Total Ronpa Island and Penguinronpa, two fangans I look back on in high reverence despite never fully reading) invoke a special kind of nostalgia to me. So, upon seeing a ton of people on my feed talk about Deception Examination, I was bound to read it eventually. And, despite my admittingly-rocky reception to the prologue, what I discovered when I kept reading was a really fun story.

To start off, we have the cast. While I admit I wasn't the most receptive to them at first (I'm so sorry for judging you, Naga and Frankie), almost every cast member grew on me. While this mostly comes from their respective quirks being presented in super likable ways, I also think the deeper delves into the lives of the characters / perspectives really helps. Both the second and third killer are given insight into their home lives / how that affected their desire to go through with the murder, the Dream Theatre sections (Chester's in particular) give an internal dive of their desires and insecurities, and Edric Pluto's positing about survivalism and morality make him easily the best-written character in the story to me.

I also have to say this is the funniest fangan I've come across thus far. Vanity getting plastered before the Chapter 2 trial, Chester's Big Reveal™️ over his talent, and especially the non-canon April Fools post are some of the hardest I've laughed at a fangan's jokes before, and that's not even mentioning small, one-off jokes the characters make due to their bantering.

But all of that pales in comparison to my favorite part of the story: the cast interactions. Seriously, the prologue does a major disservice by solely focusing on Faith because damn, does this group of characters mesh with one another amazingly. Small, petty rivalries like Naga's and Arthur's, grounded and earnest relationships like Chester's and Milo's, and even small one-off interactions leap off the pages, as do large group events.

In fact, I'd say this one of the sole fangans I prefer the daily life to deadly life over: while the trials and investigations are certainly fun, losing cast members also loses their unique way of interacting with others, making it feel like there's a hole in the story now that they're gone. Because of this, every death has some sort of impact to me which, while definitely a positive, always makes me sad whenever deadly life inevitably has to show up.

Lastly, it's just such a cool novelty to have a fangan with ARG elements? As much as I enjoy the main story, there's something so neat about additional plotlines and characters being introduced in the super-spoilery side blog that should only be read once you're all caught up and (apparently) the Discord server. There feels like there's a whole other story brewing outside the one we're aware of, something I stumbled upon in happenstance after just wanting to collect some fanart references. And, while I'll warn you some of the mystery of the main story's spoiled knowing the ARG info, it's super duper fun if you want to create an even-more developed story experience for yourself.

And that's all I have to say this time around! Please check this story out if you get the chance, and I'll see you in the next YOTF report!

FORMAT: "Instaronpa" (written, but told through images that look like stills from a game/web video fangan)

WHERE TO FIND IT: Instagram (SUPER BIG PRO-TIP: For the love of all things holy, please navigate posts using the Google Doc sheet detailing all the story posts if you want to avoid spoilers! Almost every death was discovered by me due to having to scroll down manually, so don't make the same mistake!)

FAVORITE CHAPTER: Chapter 3. The daily life follows main character Faith's attempts at being a leader, while the deadly life serves as one massive teardown of her efforts. Mix that with one death that's super flashy and another narratively poignant, really good characterization for a lot of characters, and some super-emotional writing across the board, and you're in for a wild ride.

FAVORITE CHARACTER: Surprisingly, Christopher Polo. While he's a shy, quiet fellow who feels more comfortable exploring than socializing, his keen observational skills and general helpfulness also make him one of the few reliable braincell havers in the cast.

OTHER STANDOUT CHARACTERS: Frankie Instein, who quickly went from "character I wasn't a fan of" to "a goofy breath of fresh air with some of the tightest character writing / compelling character motivations in the story", and Arthur The LXIXth, whose noble-heartedness mixed with his overconfidence and casanova wannabe personality made me want to keep reading the story, prologue be damned (Plus his name translates to Arthur the 69th, for crying out loud! What's not to love?)