#i still dont know which one's dean and which one's cas

[tiktaalic]

let's all talk about supernatural. i'll start. in 2009 kim manners told misha collins it was gay to sit on a bed. due to the lack of distance. he was right. and misha collins did it anyway. what followed was 12 years of television subject to different directors writers and actors all with different opinions on the subject of whether or not dean and castiel were gay. because of this rotating list of minds and directions the messages you receive are varied. but crucially. there is groundwork laid in closeups. standing five feet apart in bobby's kitchen filmed as if they're face to face. across the room from each other in tmwwbk but cuts between close up to close up. now you could easily argue that camerawork that rejects this method is trying to convey a different message of less empathy. but. we are not working only with camera work that conveys distance. we're working with a foundation of intimate conversations filmed as intimate closeups . followed by intimate conversations filmed with yards and yards between them. for an amv i was trying to use the s8 talk where cas is sitting on the bed and dean walks over sits down and says talk to me and i eventually had to scrap it because they're never in the same frame. i was going frame by frame in that scene trying to get maybe three seconds where you can see both of them but you never can. in the scene where dean sits a foot away and asks. what's wrong. you can tell me. you can talk to me. and cas proceeds to bare his soul. which is one of two things: bad directing, or purposeful directing. bad directing requires us to operate under the assumption that people who work on supernatural are bad at their jobs (likely). purposeful directing requires us to operate under the assumption that people who work on supernatural are good at their jobs, and given an intimate conversation, looked for ways to dilute the emotion in it, and did so. this is also likely. when supernatural shows me castiel telling dean i love you, and does it with shoddy camerawork, they are practicing tell not show. they are turning to the camera and telling me. this means nothing. disregard this. dont you see how they're a good court length apart from each other. doesn't this distance make you feel like you should interpret this with a platonic lens. but what they are showing me. is castiel telling dean winchester. i love you. which comes across even through the janky disjointed shots. the diluted effect still has an outsized emotional impact. so my takeaway is not. well i guess this means nothing. it is. i see the tricks you are trying to use on me. and they dont work on me because i know how to interpret storytelling and i'm not young and shiny and stupid. my takeaway is . wow. dean and cas., are in love for real, and they put it on my screen, and i am going to plant dynamite in director richard speight's home

[yinorathedragontamer]

how do you think the spn boys ( Sam, Dean, Cas) would separately react to a reader who needs reading glasses. like it's boring long ass research time and reader just pulls out their glasses and the boys are like '??? when was this'. I just think it would be very cute 😭🫶

a/n: OMG YES!! i love this request sm <3 though personally i dont have reading glasses, i tried to make this accurate, i hope this is good T.T i hope you enjoy!!

pairing: Sam, Dean, Cas (seperately) x gn!reader

Dean Winchester

it was just another ghost case, a vengefull spirit that's pissed off, so ofcourse, you had to figure out who this ghost was, when they died and where the remains were burried.

you were in a small town, the ghost was killing people with what they feared, so far, there were three victims, one was a woman who was scared of heights, she got pushed off a building. the second was a man who was scared of tight spaces, he got suffocated in a closet, and lastly there was a young girl that was scared of deep water, and she drowned in the deep side of a pool, all over the span of a month.

Sam offered to go get you three some proper lunch from the local store, so you and Dean have to do most of the research, or atleast make a start on it.

Dean is making himself comfortable on one of the two motel beds, with Sam's laptop for research.

you sit down next to him, with a book on vengefull spirits, because you mentioned something about how this spirit could be a different kind than usual.

Dean glances at you for a second, a small smile on his lips, but quickly, his expression changes to one of absolute surprise as you whip out a pair of glasses and put it on, opening your book, though in the corner of your eye you can see him looking at you.

"what?" you raise an eyebrow.

"you have reading glasses?" Dean asks in a surprised tone.

"yeah, obviously" you glance at him.

"got a problem with that?" "what? no, no ofcourse not" he replies, though he has a teasing smile on his face, which makes you roll your eyes. yeah, he was so gonna use this against you for teasing.

Sam Winchester

its been over an hour since Dean said he was gonna go and check out the scene once more with Cas, and you and Sam are still sitting there in a motel room.

Sam has been researching for the past 45 minutes, on his laptop. you two are quiet, save for the occasional typing from Sam.

you made yourself a cup of tea, before sitting down at the small table in the room, pulling a book. you also pull out your reading glasses, putting them on and adjusting them slightly before flipping your book open.

Sam, being so engrossed on his laptop, doesn't notice for about 20 minutes, untill he looks up to ask if you've found anything, but the words die on his tongue as he looks at you, focused and reading... with glasses? since when?

"uh... did you find anything yet?" he ask with slight hesitation. he doesn't want to mention the sudden glasses, because what if you take offense? or get embarrassed? he doesn't want that, the least he wants is feel like an absolute idiot.

"no" you respond with a sigh, putting your book down and sliding off your glasses to be ontop of your head, grabbing your now room temperature tea, though you know Sam, and you can see in his eyes that he's confused about the glasses.

"i've had them for years, though they make researching on a laptop even shittier, and usually i borrow yours for research, so i don't put them on. besides, they don't do much for anything else, and i usually inspect the items we find at a scene, so, don't feel bad you didn't notice them before" you explain, smiling a little to yourself when he lets out a silent, relieved sigh.

"okay, okay, so i'm not a terrible boyfriend for not knowing you had reading glasses, good to know" he says with a slight laugh at the end of his sentence.

"you look cute in them, they suit you"

Castiel

Dean and Sam left to get dinner, leaving you in the motel room alone to research some more, because why not.

you were peacefully reading some newspapers, checking for any details you might've missed. the glasses you were wearing sliding down every once in a while, so you adjust them to sit back up on your nose properly.

you suddenly hear the sound of wings fluttering, and low and behold, Cas is standing across from you, though instead of the usual greeting, you're met with silence as you two look at eachother, the angel tilting his head to the side as he usually does when he's curious about something.

"....hello [name]..." he finally says, his eyebrows furrowing subtly.

"i didn't know you needed reading glasses." he mentions rather bluntly, making you smile.

"yeah, i know. you haven't been around much lately during research" you see him furrow his brows even more.

"i... think i should've known." he mumbles.

"isn't it normal for someone to know those things about their partner?" he asks you.

"yeah, but its not a big deal if you simply haven't noticed, its just a pair of glasses i barely use, its nothing to feel bad about" you say reassuringly.

[sardonic-the-writer]

rant about Gabriel to me I need to understand him

im going to format this like you've never seen the show, just in case you haven't, so if you have just bare with me

gabriel is a bit of an enigma. for the first two and a half episodes he shows up in, he's not even known as gabriel. he's on screen as 'the trickster' and is masquerading as one. (tricksters in spn canon are powerful demigod creatures of myth that can alter reality how they want, normally using their powers to play deadly pranks on malicious humans in ironic ways. i.e mauling someone who tests products on animals via a sewer alligator)

the reason he's doing this as a self proclaimed "witness protection" method is because he's in hiding, pretending to be a trickster to hide from his family; which is heaven since he's the archangel gabriel. surprise surprise. this is revealed in the episode 'changing channels', (season four) which is i believe the best ranked episode on the entire show by the audience and one of my favorites. 'mystery spot' (season three) is another one he stars in (as rhe trickster, not gabriel. we still dont know that), and i think it's the second highest ranked. and 'tall tales' (season two) is the first one he shows up in which is also very highly ranked.

gabriel has a habit of faking his death a lot to escape responsibility, which he does in the episode 'hammer of the gods' (season five [?] i think) after being "stabbed" by lucifer so he doesn't have to really stick around and watch his family (lucifer and michael) fight. but we don't know that it was a fake out for nearly eight seasons. (there is an instance where he shows up again in season nine but that was a fake out and not the real him). in 'hammer of the gods' we also find out that gabriel really had gone all in with his so called witness protection while pretending to be a trickster; so much so that most of the mythological world/pretty much anyone but cas sam and dean knows him as the actual god of tricksters, loki, and not by his true name. later on when he comes back in season thirteen we find out that's because the real loki offered to share the same face with gabriel back when he first came to earth wayyyyyyy long ago to help him out. and when we meet loki later when gabriels trying to kill him for selling him off to one of the princes of hell asmodeus (i'll get into that) it's basically just the actor richard speight jr playing two roles at once. if that makes any sense. one of my favorite episodes, although i think that's just because i hadn't really seen gabriel in months and was over excited. i'll have to see if the hype holds up on my rewatch

but okay, for some backstory on the whole being sold thing, after gabriel faked his death in 'hammer of the gods', he ran off to some island to get in contact with loki and his kids (think fenrir. spn uses real mythological names and bloodlines as side plots sometimes) to go dark again. loki pretends to entertain the idea and let's gabriel play poker with hookers for a few days (gabe has also stared in a porno before and enjoys eating candy even though angels never get hungry. he's fun that way) before betraying him and basically selling him off as a slave to a prince of hell, who locks him away for hundered (thousands maybe?) of years, constantly draining his archangel grace just enough to not leave gabe powerless, but also enough to torture him horribly. it's awful, and all explained in the episode 'unfinished buisness' (season thirteen) which is all about him enacting revenge on loki and the tricksters kids. but the takeaway is that the first time we see gabe after season five, he's a completely different person. almost like a scared animal. if the animal has had its mouth sewn shut by a demon, that is.

anyways, sam and dean and cas help revert him back to his usual self, and he runs away from his problems for a few episodes, before finally confronting them and dying for real this time at the hands of an alertnate world version of his brother michael a few episodes later. the later seasons writing was so fucked up in my opinion, and the way gabriel died was done so wrong, but i think that's because im biased. frowns

my explination of him does no justice. he's a smug, silly, tricky, multi layered, funny son of a bitch that has fuck ass smile where his eyes crinkled at the corner and i. oughhh. i love him. urgh. yeah

[the-night-moves-writing]

Her Rescuers

The Winchesters X sibling reader

Summary: When the whole world finds out about another Winchester the relationship you have with your brothers might take a hit, but can you all pull through to keep your bond strong or will your own self loathing be the death of what you hold dearest

Warnings: Angsty, A bit of self doubting, self loathing, Mentions of J*hn Winchester (this man is absolutely a warning)

Characters: Sam Winchester x Sibling reader, Dean Winchester x sibling reader, mentions of Castiel

Word count: 1395

A/N: Hi guys! Its been a hot minute since i posted anything on here! I was inspired to write more lately though so i thought i might as well share it with you! Also i tried to be as gender neutral as possible but if i did mess up let me know and i can fix that! Thanks!

I've been stuck in this castle, up in a tower. Been waiting forever on a rescuer to save me. The castle was never literal, it was always a metaphor for the life I am trapped in. Searching for an escape from life is pointless and useless, being a hunter will always follow me. My brothers have always tried to protect me but with the monsters and the demons and the angels everywhere it was only a matter of time before things went wrong before they found out about me. I was always kept in the dark, Sam and Dean claimed it was safer that way. 

The youngest Winchester would always be Sam to the outside world, but we all knew it was me. Though I knew my brothers couldn't see me as one of them, they hunted and I didn’t, they protected the world and I couldn't, they were John and Mary’s kids and I wasn't. All I was is a product of my fathers grief after the loss of his wife. I knew just as well as anyone that I was undeserving to carry the Winchester name. That was until I was needed. Once the angels knew of my existence it was only a matter of time till everyone else did too. Word spread to demons

and monsters alike, the existence of another Winchester was a big deal, it was a weakness to exploit, and so I was forced into this life.

 Dean and Sam were unhappy with the development but there was nothing they could do but train me to protect myself and get me prepared for whatever came our way, the tattoo and the rib branding by Cas sucked but with my brothers insisting they were necessary how could I refuse. Now here I am trapped in my metaphorical tower waiting for a prince that will never come. In reality stuck in a fucking bunker awaiting my freedom which I will never have again. I know that this is for the better but why do I feel this sadness, I mean I got what I wanted didn’t I? To be a part of what my brothers were a part of, but this sadness still follows me around like a lost dog. One thing I've found is that there are no coping mechanisms, at least no healthy ones. Just so much pain and alcohol, sometimes drug use too. 

The self destructiveness of it all is killing me. I remember how my brothers were before all of this happened, they sent me to school and brought me back trinkets from the towns they visited. They were happy to see me and I was happy to see them too. We would play boring games and watch movies. Now everything has changed. I no longer go to school and they no longer bring me trinkets. Sometimes we hunt together but it's mostly quiet and usually Dean is yelling that I've screwed up, like I dont know I'm not good enough. I want things to go back to how they were, and I know that this is mostly my brothers blaming themselves, they were supposed to protect me, they were older. Dean always said if one of us could get out it would be me. That when I got to live in a nice house, with a husband and kids that he’d visit, be uncle Dean, and bring Sam along to be uncle Sammy.

 Now all of those dreams he had for me have disappeared, and he and Sam are kicking themselves for not protecting me better. I hear a knock at my bedroom door that breaks my thoughts 

“Y/N we need to talk sweetheart” Dean's voice comes through my door steady but nervous

“Sure” I call back to answer “I’ll meet you in the library”

I get up from my desk to head to the library, anxiety nips at my heels as i walk down the corridor into the room, and i look to see Dean and Sam sitting at the mahogany table staring at the spot where their names had been carved

“You guys needed something?” i say my voice still shaky from the nerves swarming my body like bees 

Sam looks up at me first, then turns to Dean allowing him to answer me

“Yes, sit down baby” Dean says without meeting my gaze 

I knew this would be bad, the boys hadn’t called me baby in years after I had claimed I was “too old” and “grew out of it”. Hearing that old nickname gave me chills as I pulled out a chair and waited with anticipation as to what was going to happen next.

“I…. um We wanted to say that we are sorry.” Dean stumbled through his words, something that was very out of character for him to do 

“What are you guys sorry for?” I said staring at Sam who still was yet to meet my eyes then turning to Dean who, as it seemed was now also refusing to look at me.

“I… uh… well we know that things have been strained and different as of late.” Sam finally spoke still not looking up from what must have been a very interesting spot on the table

“You mean since heaven and hell and everything in between found out I exist.” i stated plainly as the boys seemed to stare harder away from me at my tone and words

“We weren't trying to make you feel bad but in our own self pity, of not being able to protect you we made you upset. We miss you sweetheart, we miss your smiles and the way you laugh, we miss how you used to run and meet us at the door after a hunt. We… were just sorry things have to be this way now.” Dean seemed to have to force the words from his lips to spill into the air, hanging above all three of us like a dangerous sword that could fall at any second. 

“I miss you guys too.” i stated “ i miss the way Sam used to braid my hair and the way Dean made sure i ate,i miss the games we played in the car when you would drive me to school or the trinkets you would bring me back from hunts. But I really just miss my older brothers.”  I said my voice softened to a whisper at the end as tears welled up in my eyes. I felt them finally move to look at me but this time it was I who could not bring myself to look up at them. While staring at my hands in my lap I heard the sound from the other side of the table, the movement of a chair. When I looked up Sam and Dean had made their way around the table to where I was seated. 

“We are so sorry baby, we didn't mean for any of this to happen.” Sam stated

“All we wanted was to protect you and give you the life we couldn’t have” Dean said finishing Sams thought

Dean who had moved to squat by my feet stared up at me, looking at me I saw the gears turn in his head

“ I have a surprise for you though, we just got back from hunting a vampire pack out in washington.” he said, shoving a hand in his right side jacket pocket “ I got you something you might like”.  He pulled out a little key chain and grabbed my hand to place it in my palm. Staring at the little keychain in my hand I felt tears begin to run down my face and chin. Sam moved to hug me as Dean went to wipe the tears from my skin. 

I knew at this moment that I was not a weakness to the boys nor a Winchester but Sam and Deans little sister. That this was what I was missing so desperately, that this is what I had wanted. 

I was never stuck in a tower nor being denied my freedom, I was merely a princess who had exiled herself to her room with her princely big brothers guarding her, ensuring her safety and even pulling her out when she needed it the most. Even fighting off the loneliness and sadness that may try to cause her harm. Her Rescuers.

[adidegmez]

spn s6 spoilers

I know there are many spelling mistakes in the text. but I wanted to share anyways. If I don't forget, I'll make arrangements tomorrow.

s6 ep1(exile on main st.)

hi dean😁. dean is happy. he is living a normal life. we entered with a happy music. everything will go bad, right? his old habits won't leave him. he is still running into danger. sam and samuel is back that is a good thing but i think bad guys are behind this.

s6 ep2(two and a half men)

i love soft dean. i love him no matter what. he would've made a great father. i still can't trust campbells and sam(a little). lisa understands dean and i love her for this.

s6 ep3(the third man)

btw what happened to the father shapeshifter. I thought they would catch him in this ep. I love teleportation. Dean's reactions to the teleportation are very funny.

s6 ep4(weekend at bobby's)

i love seeing bobby. i missed seeing dean but i really loved this ep. i am glad bobby got out.

s6 ep5(live free or twihard)

sam let the vampire turn dean into a vampire. why sam? he litterally watched it. sam isn't sam. he is different. he let his brother turn into a monster. idc if there is a cure what if he drank blood dean wouldn't drink i know he would rather die than drink. which he did. but how could sam do that. dean could never be a monster. even if no one stops him he'll stop himself. i am glad dean learned what sam did. he doesnt know why he did it neither do we but its good that he knows he cant trust him. no dean you can't trust sammy. he isn not the sam we know and love. either he changed or he is not the real sam. either way he is not the person he used to be and we cannot trust him. and sam and samuels deals are different. samuel hid djin from winchesters. and samuel doesnt know whats up with sam. It may have been the same person who brought them back, but I think something different must've happened afterwards.

s6 ep6(you can't handle the truth)

dean couldn't handle the truth. did sam deserved the beating i dont know. he is different but even if he cant feel anything i think he must know what is wrong and what is right. he really let dean be a monster. i dont know how he can redeem himself. i hope he can, really. but i dont know how he can after all af this. and what is sam if he is not human? the goddess of truth couldn't have lied.

s6 ep7(family matters)

what do you mean his soul is gone cas? Sam is lying, again. i know he cant feel but he must know the difference in right and wrong. i love crowley some times but most of the time i want him dead.

s6 ep8(all dogs go to heaven)

sam really doesn't has a soul. he makes logical choices. but they need emotions sometimes.🤷🏻‍♀

s6 ep9(clap your hands if you believe…)

aliens, huh? is gabriel back? funny ep. i love dean's reactions. and i love sam trying to understand emotions. at least he is trying.

s6 ep10(caged heat)

when i learned about cas on the internet i thought we'd see him often in the show. but he is rarely on the show. i hope we'll see him more he is so funny. i am not sure if sam should have his soul back either. i dont think crowley is really dead. he'll come back.

s6 ep11(appointment in samarra)

sam's gone too far. he tried to kill bobby. i hope this sam will be gone for good and we can have old sam back.

s6 ep12(like a virgin)

sam might be back. it's nice to see sam care. i missed him. soulless sam wasn't sam. and i can see itin his face. the way he looked. i love jared padalecki. mother? is she Echidna from greek myth(percy jackson😁). might be🤷🏻‍♀.

s6 ep13(unforgiven)

i really missed caring sam.

s6 ep14(mannequin:3 the reckoning)

i really liked lisa and dean. and ben of course their little family was beautiful. i think dean was genuinly happy with them. i now believe sammy when he says he's got dean's back and so does dean.

s6 ep15(the french mistake)

i love balthazar. omg i didnt know this would be the ep where they go to the real world or something like that. i thought that was in later seasons. im so excited. this ep is amazing. what is wrong with the angels? they have no difference from the demons.

s6 ep16(…and then there were none)

rufus and bobby might be my favorite hunter duo after winchesters. i was really angry with sam and i didnt know if i could love him the way i did before all the bad things happened but after soulless sam i really missed old sam and i love how he cares about dean i love how he would kill anyone for dean and i love he is back. he did some bad thing but he always tried to save the world and dean. and i love him. and i really hated soulless sam. but i am glad we got soulless sam for a little while thanks to him i still love him the way i did before all the demon thing. rip rufus.

s6 ep17(my heart will go on)

ellen and jo are alive. ellen and bobby are married! they don't know about titanic. this must be a parellel universe. and i liked this universe already. [KAZ 2Y5] is back. impala is gone.

s6 ep18(frontierland)

somethings are really wrong with angels. dean can pull off any look. cas is scaring me, little bit.

s6 ep19(mommy dearest)

Jefferson starships i love dean's face when he says that. dean, you are a genious. i hope eve is really dead(probably not). cas and crowley, huh? they make a good team i guess. but this will make dean mad.

s6 ep20(the man who would be king)

cas looked at us, right? castiel brought back sam and he lied. dean will be devastaded. dean really trusts him. i would've trusted him too. dean has a point. but i saw what he did. cas lied to their faces. crowley manipulated cas. every bad thing ha ppining in spn is because of manipulative demons. first ruby then crowley. And yet a father abandons his child.

s6 ep21(let it bleed)

i knew balthazar would help. dean sad again. i wish he could just live with lisa and ben.

s6 ep22(the man who knew too much)

how could cas do that to sam? balthazar was right. he didnt have to help but he did anyways, is a good angel. cas is really changed. he broke the deal. even demons wouldnt break deals. cas why did you kill balthazar? he was just trying to help dean. you've got to be kidding me. angels and demons they always ruin everything. i really thought cas wouldnt go this far. but he did. i know some spoilers but i am not sure what they mean but cas must go back to normal. I know he will make peace with the Winchesters. hopefully soon.

i would watch new season now but i just slept 4 hours this morning so i have to sleep. I'll watch new season in the morning.

[420technoblazeit]

Abt the jealousy of Cas, I don't think Cas is jealous of Crowley for who he is . because I do think he thinks he's better than him, but in a relationship yea I can see jealousy and possessiveness I mean he did sear deans skin and carved into his ribcage. If they did get together literally all of body will be marked.

So either it's one month with Crowley then the other month with him

But also I just can see Cas just waiting. Until he becomes the priority. And until then let's dean do his own thing and Cas does his.

i mean i agree that cas isnt jealous of crowley for who he is and you can have your own headcanons. cas is certainly a character who has a lot of pride especially in the earlier seasons but i think a lot of that is gone by the time the later seasons come around. i'd argue even after season 6 he has significantly less pride, though i guess you could argue season 8 cas still has a bit of it. i just dont think that there's canon basis for him being a very jealous person when we've already seen a situation where dean chose crowley over cas (the demon dean summer) and cas didn't seem to hold any grudge with crowley over it

remember that we do see a conversation between sam and cas in 10x01 about dean running away, and while sam seems to think that there's a demon running around in dean's body cas understands that dean himself made the choice to run away. sam seems to think that crowley might have forced dean to leave but cas dismisses that almost immediately and instead brings up whether or not dean's too far gone as a demon. there's a focus here on dean leaving being dean's choice

also here's a scene from 10x03 from when crowley first meets up with cas again and discusses curing dean. if cas, like sam, didn't understand just how much dean meant to crowley he would've left it at that thinking that crowley was just using dean as a guard dog. but he makes sure to point out here that dean might be too far gone because he knows that for crowley to have stuck with dean for that entire summer he must care about what happens to him

even much later in the season cas again asks crowley for help in curing dean, even after sam has tried to kill him, and i think it's because cas is maybe the only person who actually gets it. who understands what it's like to be an immortal being in love with a human as reckless and self-destructive as dean. and to sacrifice so much for him and not ask for anything in return. he knew that even with nothing in return crowley would help in getting rid of the mark because he knows how much it's hurting dean

and about the carved ribcage and handprint thing if we're being honest the whole possessive branding thing is like. entirely fanon. to my knowledge the show never explicitly mentions that as being a possessive thing, the fandom just thought it'd be cute to make it into that. we know that the warding's main function is to hide sam and dean from angels and that the handprint is a byproduct of cas dragging dean out of hell. it is by no means proof that cas is actually possessive of dean or would be upset about him being with someone else

idk i just think pretending that cas and crowley's relationship could ever boil down to just ohhhhh cas is jealous of crowley's thing with dean significantly flattens their relationship and gets rid of the most interesting thing about it, which is that basically the only thing they can ever agree on is loving dean. that's unironically their common ground in a significant number of issues. theyre an angel and a demon to begin with so theyre already about as different as you can get but when you really look at the core of who they are, theyre both beings who are too emotional and human for their own good and you can always see that best in how they interact with dean

[shewolf-sinclair]

yknow a fic i wanna read? a non supernatural destiel au. Every character still has the same and/or similar trauma and relations to canon but like make it not supernatural.

Dean and Sam are still brothers. Mary still died in a freak accident when sam was a baby (probably some back alley mugging type thing*) John was still a shitty father obsessed with his job (probably something that requires him to travel a lot), neglecting his kids, so dean primarily raised sam. John still taught the boys basic fighting skills and self defense because he was afraid of the world*. Dean still dropped out of HS to help with the family business (but maybe he refuses to travel like john did). Sam still goes to college and it creates family drama. Dean still has anger issues and struggles to express his emotions, still copes with sex and alcohol.

Castiel still has religious trauma and struggles to find and understand his humanity sometimes. But ofc is a nerd for anthropology and the concept of the human experience.

something happens to john (i dont know what yet but probably he just has a midlife crisis and runs away off the grid) so dean takes over his buisness and goes to reconnect with sam. they still argue about whether or not john was a bad father.

jo is a server at a local restaurant run by her mom, in which sam and dean regular. dean and jo become besties. Jo’s dad probably was johns coworker before dying (i cant think of a way to work in the fact that johns response for his death)

one day dean gets into some accident or street fight, and cas as s bystander steps in and saves deans life. They become friends than lovers.

-I’m trying to find a way to work other re occurring faves in.

And idk the rest but does it make sense?? please someone write this or help me write it. it would be very angsty ofc.

*I had Mary die in street violence so john had something to be afraid of and had a reason to the boys self defense. I’m trying to keep it as similar to the brothers’ backstory as possible in a non supernatural AU.

[autisticandroids]

15, 21, 23?

15. something you learned this year

i don't know if i can say i learned a new skill as such. but one thing is like... i really enjoyed making three card stud. and it really opened my eyes to like, how much of what i like about the practice of fanfiction is the meticulous remixing/reinterpretation of canon. there's a way in which the AMV is a more... analytical art form than the fanfic, because you are literally forced by the constraints of the medium to keep to the text. all you have are song lyrics and the kuleshov effect to convince your audience to take the new meaning you intend to convey from stuff already in the show. and i brought that ethos to three card stud even though i did add stuff. in a lot of ways three card stud was just me listing off things from canon i think a lot about and saying eh? eh? like. hoping the context would make it clear *why* this stuff makes me crazy. and i think that was a lot of the motivation behind the fic i'm currently working on, which is about dean and cas getting caught by the police. that fic at this point is mostly lists of things that have happened in spn episodes, placed in a new context by baffled feds and cops. which is the fun part. so like basically i learned that this is really fun, listing off canon facts in a new context

21. most memorable comment/review

so the most memorable traditional comment as such i got was probably this one, on i fold in half so easily (ifihse tends to generate the best comments because it's extremely dark without the ways in which it is dark being obviously flagged. so people are more shocked and more forced to think). "Cas: no officer i am very happy please dont tell dean im emotionally complex" is so funny and true that's literally what happens in that fic.

another top contender is this one, on getting serious, which generates good comments for the same reason ifihse does, though it's a lot less intense.

but in terms of my favorite *response to my work,* it was the breastfeeding anon saga (in chronological order here) which was a response to my fic smorgasbord.

and then i wrote a fic based on those anons, and then i got these very funny tags on my fic post:

23. fics you wanted to write but didn’t

when i tell you about the 120k deanvictor fic which is literally 90k of victor henriksen hunting down a serial killer dean winchester while becoming a little (sexually) obsessed with him and then 30k of victor knowing about the supernatural and moonlighting as a hunter while he and dean suck each others dicks so much.

and also it's about victor's relationship with his two ex wives and his former stepdaughter who he is still emotionally a parent to even though they have no legal relationship and the coworker he had an emotional affair with who he doesn't speak to anymore and how he feels trapped in his life and his job and dean represents this escape for him this total freedom. just living in his car on the road and not having to worry about what your boss thinks or needing to quit smoking. while for dean victor represents this stability and adulthood dean can never achieve. and dean leaves three spare pairs of underwear in victor's divorcé bachelor pad as a kind of little... fantasy. of what life could be like.

anyway the most compelling scene from that, IN MY MIND, is a scene where victor STILL thinks dean is a serial killer. and now he has him in custody. and against his will he's... charmed. by dean. because dean is charming and pathetic, shaking and sweating from mild alcohol withdrawal but still cracking jokes and being friendly and observant and extremely young-feeling, for 28. and earnest in a way he didn't expect. and they're forced to work together against a demon siege, a spin on jus in bello where victor still doesn't find out about the supernatural he's just protecting himself and a prisoner from a threat. and he has the uncomfortable realization that he's attracted to dean winchester (serial killer) (guy he is trying to take down) (has killed so so many people). and he's like well. we can table that for later. and then dean escapes.

so i've been trying to figure out a way to scoop out just that scene and turn it into its own fic because that's actually manageable for me.

the dean and cas pursued by the cops idea also comes a bit from frustration that i can't write this, though the feds in that one are ocs bc it's later.

from here

[cupcraft]

i know ive been screaming to the void to no one about wanting more demon!dean in my life but one critique I have is that I hate how most of the demon dean fics make dean like too evil. Like sooo evil that he's like almost ooc cartoon villain wants power in a weird way, like so evil that hes just like lost all context. Or they make him like really really noncon (in regard to destiel fics) which is just, yeah anyway. Like what i mean is that I need demon dean to be dean but allowed to be more of a freak and explore the complexities of this and his trauma all mixed into one. like no demon!dean wouldnt just like happily get souls for hell or like be into serving his role. He's still dean and he hates being told what to do. Like the best demon!dean fics are the ones where he's like still fiercly independent and not into the whole savior/god thing. Like he's still got the "i'm not worth anything" disease. Even in canon they talk about how demon dean might have had a lot of his reservations/insecurities pulled back because of how little he cared (but it was implied by crowley his problem was his insecurities and that he secretly did care and was acting out). Like demon dean is sooo complicated you dont get him like me. He would 1000% kill and maim but it'd be interesting. give demon dean what canon gave soulless Sam like you get mee screams and explodes. Like my perfect victory would be Dean pretending to do jobs for Crowley and then just ruining his life but not because he wants power/to be king of hell but just because he can and he still doesn't trust crowley. Or like him going home with Sam and doing hunts, but being a demonic freak on top of it and not really caring about saving people. Like losing parts of himself but still having some parts of himself. Like wanting to stay a demon not for power but because it hurts less. Like fighting with cas but he still hesitates. do you hear me.

[durmom]

Its Useless

Part 9

Part 8:

Everything cements for Kelly, when Lucifer puts his hands on her. The boys seem hopeful with the device Ketch gave them. Everything is going to plan, until Sam watches Lucifer's essence go down the vent. Cas gets Kelly out of the room, still debating on what you said. Dean however is happy that they got Lucifer, not knowing what Sam saw. When they are put under arrest Dean can feel the blood drain from his face. He is at a loss for words, he feels utterly defeated by you. How could you be on their side and let this happen? In the truck Sam looks to Dean concerned. Sam is confused, specifically about you. It was clear to him that you cared about them, and would never want to hurt them so why, why would you not tell them this?

While Kelly goes to the bathroom Cas is thinking about what you said, was this nephilim a good thing? When Kelly calls him, he speaks without thinking, telling her she needs to get rid of the baby. Now stressed about the situation, he realizes its up to him to find Kelly, and that he does believe the nephilim needs to be taken care of. Cas goes back to the motel, seeing the boys are no longer there, he calls Mary to meet him at the bunker. 

Dean is brooding in his cell, when the interrogator comes in all he can think about is how he wants to kill him. He’s an annoyance, disturbing his thoughts. His thoughts about you. His anger is so immense and all he can do is sit in his cell, where no one, but you, knows where it is. At this point he’s thinking about every way to escape. 

At the bunker, you await Cas and Mary’s arrival. When they do arrive Mary is pissed when you explain what happened. She’s pissed as Cas for leaving her boys and losing Kelly. Shes pissed at you for letting them walk into it.

“Mary, I can’t explain it all to you but I promise you they are okay. It’s for the greater good.”

“I dont get why they didn’t call me?”

“Mary, you were out.” Cas says.

“Why did you let this happen?” she turns to you.

“Because… it needed to happen. I need you to trust me on this. They will be out. I promise you, just wait for them to call.”

“You promise me?”

“I promise. If not, you can kill me.”

“I will.”

Cas is not satisfied and goes to Crowley, who refuses to help. Mary stays at the bunker, when Alicia calls asking for help you tell her to go.

“Go, It's what they’d want.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes. I’ll run point from here, keep hunting, and working with the Brits. Which by the way will turn on you eventually but keep them close for now.”

“They’ll what?”

“Sorry today’s been a mess. The Brits will turn on hunters but right now we need to keep them close. When the time comes, I’ll call.”

“O-Okay.” Mary rushes out, confused, and clearly annoyed with you. Once alone, you feel the crushing weight of everything. 

Over the next weeks Cas keeps trying to hunt down Kelly and Mary continues hunting. You on the other hand spent two weeks in another depressive episode. You’d sleep until one or two before forcing yourself up to eat, check on Mary and Cas, and look for cases for them to work. After two weeks you get angry, why did Amara bring you here? It’s annoying to not be able to talk to the boys. That's when you get an idea. Cas has brought the impala back so you head to the car and rummage through the glove box. Finding one of the back up phones you call Crowley.

“Out so soon?” He asks.

“No, he’s not.”

“And who is this I’m speaking to? Is this Squirrels Nut?”

“Ew, what? No, Crowley, my name is y/n i’ve been working with the boys for six months. I need you to smuggle letters to them.” “And why would I do that?”

“Because I know you have Lucifer, and I wont tell Sam and Dean who will absolutely kill you.” The line goes silent.

“Where should we meet?”

“There's a bar, down the street from the bunker.”

“I know the place.”

“One hour.” You hang up.

Your foot shakes anxiously, every time the door opens you look expecting Crowley, which is dumb, you know he's just going to appear next to you. Which he does.

“Hello y/n”

“Crowley.” you actually smile. You always found him funny, dumb, but funny, and in the end he actually does do some good.

“So, Nut what's in these letters?”

“Ew, Crowley, not your best work.” He furrows his brows at you, “Nevermind, I know you know where they are, I just want you to get these to them. You won't be able to read them, to make sure they actually get to them they both have code words they have to say. I want you to return to me, here, in an hour, and tell me the code word. Also if they have anything to say, tell me.” He opens one of the letters looking it over before folding it back up, “Enochian.”

“Yes, do this and I wont tell the boys about your dumbass plan.”

“Really? For some lousy letters?”

“Yep.” You smile at him before taking a sip of the rum and coke you ordered.

“I guess I’ll be back.”

Crowley meets his inside man who somehow gets the letters to Sam and Dean. They both rush to open them.

Sam,

I know you have a lot of questions and I promise you I will answer as many as I can when you get out. To start, yes I knew this was going to happen. I swear to you it's for the greater good. I’m running things back home. Cas is looking for Kelly, yes he lost her, and your mom is hunting. She's obviously pissed at me, but it’ll be okay. Now I am going to tell you some things that you cannot share with Dean yet. I want to tell him but you know how he is, angry. Kelly’s baby. His name is Jack. He is good, nothing but good, he takes after his mom. Jack needs to be born, he saves the world. That's why I had to keep you in the dark, I couldn't risk it. Again I will answer more questions when you're out. I know you boys have a plan, it's a good plan by the way. I love you Sammy, I’ll see you soon.

P.S code word is Crowley’s a hoe.

Sam knocks on the door to signal he’s done. When the guard comes up he flashes his black eyes to show it's Crowley’s demon.

“Say, I believe her. Code word is Crowley’s a hoe.” Once alone Sam rereads the letter and can’t help but laugh. Only you could make him laugh when he’s absolutely miserable.

Dean,

I know you’re pissed at me, I don’t blame you. There's a reason why I had to let you guys go through this. I am taking care of everything at home. I’m sorry it had to be this way. For your own sanity, the reason I did this was to save the world. It might not make sense now but it will when all is said and done. Trust me when I tell you that everything will be okay. Genuinely Dean, I had to let things go the same way they do in the show for the reason it actually saves us. It saves everyone. I know you told me to leave but I’m not going to. I believe in you boys and will be by your side whether you want me to or not. I still care about you. I love you Dean Winchester.

P.S code word is magical liopleurodons

Dean gets up and knocks on the door, all he says is the code word. Once the demon leaves he turns and punches the wall. 

Crowley meets you back at the bar and recites what Sam said, and the codes.

“Sam says he believes you. Dean didn't say anything.”

“The codes?”

 “Crowley is a.. Hoe. Magical liopleurodons.”

“Good job!”

“Are we done here?” His shoulders hang low, fists balled into his pockets.

“Not quite, have a drink.” You wave over the bartender and order the fruitiest drink you can, with an umbrella.

“You know Crowley, I actually find you hilarious.”

“That's what i’ve been trying to get these hooligans to see for years!”

“They just can’t give you that satisfaction.” 

Once your drinks are finished you part. You would have liked to hang around him a bit longer but he is the King of Hell in this world, and is actually bad. So not the best idea to tell him about you. You decided to have a couple more drinks when a good looking guy comes up to you. He was no Dean, but attractive. You were drunk, and sad so you thought why not. You needed to release some steam and it's been quite a while. Dean is not going to be happy with you when he gets out, so that relationship is dead. Might as well enjoy yourself, Dean was a slut anyways. 

The hookup was messy, not wanting to leave with a guy you just met, you decide on the bathroom. He has you up against the stall, since it had been a while and you are drunk, you finish fast, as does he. The feeling is euphoric, minus the fact you kept imagining it was Dean. When all is said and done you say goodbye and go to the car. Suddenly you start crying, full of guilt. This isn't who you are, you’ve never had a one night stand type of thing. Trying to justify it was fucked up but you did need it. The following days though consisted of the same thing, getting drunk and hooking up with a guy at the bar. It was a coping method, more a method of self destruction and self harm. The guilt of the boys being locked in a cell was eating you alive. The sex allowed you to forget about it for a moment, then feel it in full swing. Your daily routine was the same. Sleep until one, eat, check for cases, call Mary, go to the bar and drink, sex, leave to go back to the empty bunker as late as you could. Everynight you found yourself in Dean’s bed, sleeping in one of his shirts. Slowly you were deteriorating. However one morning when you called Mary about a case she told you she needed you to take care of it. It was a small nest of vamps and she knew you could handle it. Reluctantly you agreed. You packed up the impala and headed to Virginia. 

The case was easy, you had Sam make you fake IDs a couple months back so you were able to get into the morgue, talk to the sheriff, and interview family and friends of the victims. You worked quickly and wrapped the case up within two days. The nest had five vamps, living in an old barn in the woods. They had kidnapped a sixteen year old girl after killing a forty year old man. You were able to save the girl and kill all the vamps. They were almost too easy to kill but you were fueled by so much rage that it was almost fun.

 That night you went back to the motel to shower before going to a bar that was a walk away. Sitting at the bar you stir your drink just staring at the liquid in the glass. Dissociating is the easiest way to get through this period. You sense a guy standing next to you. He orders an old fashioned. Taking a deep breath you take the last of your drink like a shot. You turn your head to look at the man next to you. He’s tall, between the lines of lanky and muscular, and has a boy band type haircut. Looking at his clothes he wears a suit, mismatched socks, and dress shoes. When you look back up you see him looking at you smiling politely. 

“Sorry.” 

“No you're fine. My name's Spencer.”

“Y/n, I like to just observe people.”

“Me too. What’d you notice about me?”

“You wear mismatched socks but are wearing a suit, so not your normal attire. Clearly dorky, a compliment by the way, a star wars fan and..” looking back down to his socks, “doctor who.”

“Good job.” He smiles at you before taking a sip of his drink and pulling out a stool to join you.

“Thank you. So Spencer, what about me?”

“Honestly I can’t tell much about you but clearly you’re here trying to forget something…” intently he looks into your eyes, “ or someone.”

“Ha! Kinda both.” 

“Tell me about it?”

“Hmm, why should I?”

“I’m a stranger? Tell me and I’ll share something with you?”

“Are you also trying to forget someone?”

“Kind of.”

“Okay. Deal.” You adjust in your seat, “I have a friend, Dean. Ever since I met him he’s been so back and forth with me. We are either best buds, laughing, and having a good time or we are screaming at each other. It's been so frustrating until this last case. We are PIs, I knew something about the case that I couldn’t tell him and when he found out he was so mad. I mean I’ve never heard him yell like that. But I couldn’t tell him. It was for the greater good whether he realizes it or not. It just sucks, he’s been so back and forth and now he’s… now he’s not talking to me.” “How long have you known him?”

You chuckle, “I’ve known him awhile but we became friends about six months ago.”

“Hmm.”

“Yeah.” you laugh again, “I don't really need advice, I know it’ll blow over but thanks for letting me vent.”

“You’re welcome.” Spencer smiles at you.

“So, tell me your story.” Spencer proceeds to tell you about how he’s in the FBI and he thought his friend died but they covered it up and she just came back. He tells you how angry he is about it because his boss and  best friend lied to his face while he was grieving. It was around two in the morning, you had spent hours talking. You had long sobered up and enjoyed Spencer’s company. Spencer offers to walk you back to the motel and you accept the offer. At the motel you exchange numbers saying you’d call. Going to bed that night was easier, for the first time in six weeks you talked to someone genuine, it was nice. The next few days you and Spencer kept texting, sometimes calling. He went all over the country, as did you, but he is mostly in virginia. Every night before bed you text Spencer until you fall asleep. You meet up once for dinner, after you feel like a new person. Like who you were before coming to this world, before nursing school. 

The day had finally come, Dean and Sam were dead. Not really, but it was their time to escape. You knew roughly when they’d be escaping so you had Cas and Mary meet you at the bunker and stay with you for a few days. Cas finally gets the call. You all rush to the car to meet them in Colorado. You are shaking as you get closer, excited to see them but nervous about the reactions. Cas and Mary insist on help which meant the Brits. You sit in the car as they talk. Your window is rolled down, they obviously ask about you. Cas and Mary give little explanation. The Brits lead the way down the roads towards the Rockies. Night is passing, Cas tells you and Mary to get some sleep. That was not happening. You both are anxious to see the boys. In the morning you can tell you’re close. In your lap was a change of clothes for the boys. As Cas drove down the road you kept your eyes peeled for Sam and Dean. It was still dark but early in the morning. You see them running out of the woods and yell for Cas to pull over, the Brits drive ahead a bit. Cas and Mary jump out of the car excited to see their family. Knowing Dean is mad at you, you decide to stand by the car. Still able to see the boys but not the first to greet them, you are the one who let them get arrested. Sam and Dean are excited to see their family, the reunion is heartfelt. When Sam pulls away from his mom he starts looking around when he spots you. Sam gives you a big smile and jogs over to you. He gives you a hug, so huge that he actually lifted you off the ground. 

“Thank you for your letter!”

“Of course, I needed you to know what was going on! And I knew it had been awhile since you talked to someone.”

“Yeah, it definitely gave me hope.”

“What are you doing here?” The blood rushes from your face, Sam steps aside revealing Dean, who is rightfully pissed. 

“I- I have a change of clothes for you.” Is all you can say.

“I thought I told you to leave.” Now Dean is inches away from your face.

“I can’t.”

“After the stunt you just pulled?” He puts his hands on the car, trapping you. 

“I swear it’s for a good reason.” Even though he has you trapped and is trying to intimidate you, you hold eye contact and remain calm. However you jump when he hits the car right next to your head.

“Dean!” Sam grabs his brother to pull him off. Dean shrugs Sam’s hands off.

“No Sam! I'm done with her ‘good reason’ bullshit! If she’s on our side why is she not helping?”

“She is. Dean, we don't have time for this, we have to go.”

“Fine.” 

[saturnisfallingdown]

i dont know why i shared all that information.png

[ID: A series of messages from a single person. The first reads "the openness with which dean displays his concern and care for cas in season 8 is notable because when going from late s6 + s7 into s8, it almost seems like an incredibly fast switch. In mid s7, dean still views cas as the angel who betrayed them. but as soon as we see purgatory in full, dean is so one track minded on cas it drives most of the plot. the question is, what happened in that span of time? while the normal viewer might chalk it up purely to writing differences between seasons, the answer i believe can be found in late season 7, particularly the born again identity and cas's coat as a symbol of his identity throughout seasons 4-8. in this essay i will–". The message is then quoted, and the addition reads "NO IM STILL INSANE ABOUT CAS'S COAT BECAUSE ITS SUCH A CLEAR SYMBOL FOR HIS IDENTITY!! The only times he loses it are when he loses himself in a way, whether it be by becoming human or amnesia or what have you (him not wearing it as a human is extra crazy actually because he actively chooses to leave it behind, which totally reflects him actively leaving behind his grace as we hear him talk about in 9x06). Like it's such an obvious bit of symbolism that it makes The Born Again Identity sooo much crazier because like. Dean carried Cas's coat (therefore his memory and very identity) with him between countless cars. He was the sole person carrying Cas's identity forward like thats fucking insane right". The third message reads in all caps "And then he comes back with another. He regains his angelic status but is still clipped and has a new jacket that he found himself!!!! In retaking an angel's grace he reinvented his own identity !!!!" The fourth message reads "whether you see the coat as a sign of his angelic identity or rather his sense of self as a whole is up to you but both are off the walls batshit insane". End ID]

[tiktaalic]

So I’ve been reading the sequel to Time Has Come Today, which features Teen-Dean yeeting himself back to the future and dragging the Cas from his timeline along. Which made me realise I have never considered the scenario of Cas meeting his past self. Verdict’s still out on his reaction in this fic, but I’m curious if you have any thoughts on the matter? I mean obviously poor past-Cas is immediately launched into an existential crisis of epic proportions, but how do you think later-series Cas would react to his past self?

oh he'd be sweet. very. i know this what you've heard your entire life and i know that you believe it and i know i'm not going to change your mind today. and i think baby cas would start off prickly for obvious reasons. and i think smooth and steady (normal cas) would win the race (unprickle baby cas) as long as they stayed on the level ground of regular cas going. i know what you're thinking. i know it terrifies you. i know you dont have the words for it. but i do. if the lobotomies came up baby cas would be like. MAYBE I HAVE BAD VIBES? did you ever think about that before blaming heaven for torturing me and manipulating my memories . it would go real south real fast if the genocide or dean came up. baby cas would balk at the idea of jack but get worn down by the way cas talks about fatherhood / jack himself if he met him at all. but baby cas could one hit KO normal cas by pointing out his life sucks so bad. like if baby cas went you keep saying theres nothing wrong with how i am and tojust do what i think is right but you did that and you're here and you're just as miserable as i am and WEAK with no brothers or sisters to speak of and the handful left want you dead. all for what. and if this happened when jack was dead cas would kill himself for real. if it didnt hed be like. for my son.........

[incarnateirony]

So is all of the main characters on tw a part of dean? Like is it like dean is telling his story of who he is trough them?I feel like i have seen so far a dean ”like ness’ in all of them. I Know like john and mary is given we are going to a see likeness being them his parents and all but .. i dont Know,im ramblin and dont Know if im very far off ? Also are john and mary not ’his’ john and mary? Or have i missunderstud That ?

No. They were real.

People, families, they're still real, but Dean's trapped in the source of his own infinite power, like Loki.

But what is Humanity's infinite power?

Basically he made his own trap, and that's The Queen As Is, if you will, but it rips and digs deeper than that. I guess you could call it a deep cut.

Cas noticed their aliases are usually the names of popular musicians. I'm just a worker bee.

It's not Cas himself, but this monster made from humanity's own fight to face itself and accept its life made a beast all its own. But that beast was always with humanity, in our trauma, compelling us to act out, to read things darkly, to take action against those only hoping to do well, because we haven't dug the own thorns out of our trauma.

And in Dean's case? Well, it's not the room he died in, like John. Just read the conversation par for par. What happens. Who was John standing as in that moment, where he died for his clan, a Future he had seen into and known must come to pass? The Future. Call it fate, but it was still choice.

Dean has to face that monster, that fear, that Trap. He created a monster running from the truth. That truth was his life. He wanted to change things. He wanted to go back and fuck with things, maybe to make his parents life better, maybe to even help his friends in distant futures. And it instead erased important elements of his life (Sam included.)

Because our lives are our choices. like, who we are. And dean still has choices even in his final breath, even if he's Still In The Barn. The Akrida hides undergruond, like your deepest memory. Or fear. Think back to the first promo and the cas radio tv glitch.

I'm the one who gripped you tight from this box clawing in the dark and raised you from perdition. And I'm the one who died. And who you never got to say it back to, after our fight.

But Dean had a lot to face before even finding his queen.

This bounces back to cosmogenics I've spoken of, like what Cas performed in unbirthing the shadow in the empty, which is its own topic to unpack but think heaven's womb like rowena as hell's. Can't leave but they define it. But what is heaven but the soul? And what is humanity but the soul? And what is identity but ego and choosing the self?

Dean accidentally fucked it up but it was always fucked up and that's fine. He gotta choose and face who he is, what his monsters are, and what his fears, and losses, and unspoken things are.

That's literally the plot fam.

[points back at the chart]

PLATO.

[cowbeeboy]

I wrote this back in October for one of the Suptober prompts and was very proud of it, so have fun :D

PILLOW TALK

Did you know that flowers have their own language?

Dean placed the gun he was cleaning on the table and reached for his phone instead. The message was from Cas, and after Dean read it a second time, it still didn’t make a lick of sense.

what?

Cas had been reluctant when Dean suggested he gets his own phone, but the ex-angel has been nothing but obsessed with the damn thing ever since he learned how to use it.

Out-of-context texts like these are very much a regular in Dean’s life by now, especially when the two are apart for more than a day, which they currently are. Castiel likes to share sunset pictures, pictures of that cat that wouldn’t stop following him around that day. He shares articles about rocks that Dean couldn’t care less about, or recipes, suggesting Dean cooks them when he returns to the bunker.

Does Dean care about what flower bees like the most or that butterflies taste with their feet? No, he doesn’t. Dean couldn’t care less. But Cas does, so, case closed. Dean will spend those 30 minutes reading that article about the fancy rocks he doesn’t care about because he cares about Cas. And he likes seeing Cas find things he’s interested in that have nothing to do with him or Sam. He loves listening to him talk about them.

It’s true. By gifting a specific flower to someone, you can also express a feeling toward that person, not necessarily romantic but beautiful all the same.

Isn’t that lovely?

Dean pondered on it. It did sound pretty awesome. He thought he’d heard something similar, but again, he hadn’t cared enough to find out more.

yeah, it is actually

The next text Dean received was a link to a flower article, talking about the flower language. He read through it.

Isn’t humanity astonishing? The things you’ve come up with over the centuries.

Dean smiled at his phone like some idiot. Sam from across the table noticed and didn’t pass up the opportunity to tease his brother.

“What'd he say?” he asked, pretending to be distracted by research papers, yet the amusement all over his face gave him away.

Dean looked up from his phone, making a face at him. “What?”.

“Oh, I’m sorry. I just assumed you were talking to Cas, you know, what with the stupid look on your face,” Sam smirked.

Dean felt his neck heating up, even as he scowled at his annoying little brother. He didn’t spare Sam any words though, instead, he turned back down to look at his phone again, and when he did, he saw that another message had come through. His blush furiously increased reading it.

Can I get you flowers? Cas had asked.

And what the hell was Dean supposed to say to that? He didn’t want to say no and be an asshole boyfriend or worse, hurt Cas, but he wasn’t a chick either, he didn’t need flowers. What was he gonna do with the flowers anyway? Put them in a vase and stare at them all day long until they die and he has to throw them away? Wouldn’t he be basically throwing away Cas’ nice gesture? What’s the point in that?

you dont gotta do that sweetheart

A part of Dean secretly wanted Cas to get him flowers. Flowers are pretty. He was also curious to see what flowers Cas would get him, what color they'd be. Dean would reread the article to read Cas’ hidden message, and maybe next time he’d get Cas flowers with a hidden meaning. Would Cas find the article to see what Dean said to him through the flowers?

It didn’t mean he had to admit it though.

I’m aware I don’t have to Dean, thank you.

You deserve nice things and I would like to do this for you if you’d let me.

Dean pointedly ignored the implications of that second part of the text. He gave in.

do what you want Cas

And Cas did.

Two days later, as soon as Dean stepped into his room, he saw it. On his nightstand, a neat bouquet of red carnations.

My heart aches for you.

[lasenbyphoenix]

Shipper tag game

Tagged by @sunriseverse thank you!💜

What ship were you completely obsessed with when you were a teenager, but now you don’t care about anymore?

I didn't know the concept of shipping was a thing until I was 29 and stumbled onto fandom on tumblr, (didn't know about fandom either until then), so I'm trying to think of any couples I would have considered cute in anything I watched/read growing up... and I really dont know?? Joshua Jackson was a fave actor from back then and I can't even remember if I had an opinion on the Dawson/Joey vs Pacey/Joey debate on Dawson's Creek. I was always more interested in the story than the ships! (Can you tell I'm on the aroace side of life? Lol)

Which ship would you consider your first one?

Captain America is what lead me to finding fandom in the first place so Steve Rogers/Bucky Barnes is the first that comes to mind. But before that I was very into Dr Who, so I'd probably consider The Doctor/Rose Tyler the first fictional couple I had any emotional investment in.

Your first fanfic was about which couple?

My first shippy fanfic (written before I knew what "fanfic" was) was James Bond/William Brandt Skyfall/Mission Impossible Ghost Protocol crossover.

You know the scene in Skyfall when Silva has Bond tied to a chair and starts toying with his chest and teases him about this not being in his training and Bond replies "What makes you think this is my first time?"? And then in Ghost Protocol when Jeremy Renner's character pulls himself out of the vent at the last second and gripes "Next time I get to seduce the rich guy."? I joked to my best friend that "Now we know what James Bond's first time was." And that's how that idea was born.

I started writing it as a joke for my friend but never finished it, and if I find the notebook it was written into I might just revisit it because I still quite like the idea!

Do you remember the first couple you saw fanart of?

Not for certain, but possibly either Dean/Cas or Rose/Ten.

Have you ever gotten into ship discourse?

Like ship wars or 'problematic' kind of discourse? If I did it would have been in my Captain America days (Stucky vs Stony and Peggy vs Sharon being heated topics of memory), and even then I don't remember specific incidents - as a newbie to fandom I tended to lurk and watch instead of engaging. Now I'm very much Ship And Let Ship (and only bitch in private to your mates, not in public!)

Did you use to have any NOTP or have one currently?

There have been plenty of ships I've come across that weren't my thing, Stony for example, but I'm not going to invest enough energy into recalling any others. I'm not here to spread hate on something other people like.

Who were the couple in the last fanfic you read?

On tumblr? Li Lianhua/Di Feisheng (Mysterious Lotus Casebook)

On Ao3? Ming Lou/Ming Cheng (The Disguiser)

Currently, do you have any OTPs?

So many. Zhang Rishan/Ba Ye, Hei Xiazi/Xiao Hua, Steve/Bucky, Steve/Peggy, Data/Geordi, Stiles/Derek, Jiang Cheng/Nie Huaisang, Shen Wei/Zhao Yunlan, and likely more that havent come to mind yet

Is there any couple that, to this day, you are extremely mad about not getting together?

Haha no. I think I've always just accepted canon couples as "the thing that happened in the story", and now when I have my own ship preferences, then I accept that it's *my* headcanon and not necessarily anyone else's (especially not the writer's headcanon).

When Captain America Civil War came out I realised I'd gotten WAY over invested in what was or wasn't included in the movie (although I knew realistically they weren't going to make Stucky canon ) that I took a big step back afterwards and very much made a mental separation between "this is the story those writers want to tell" and "this is the story I like to imagine".

Is there any ship you used to dislike but now you think they are kind of interesting?

Dean/Cas maybe? It wasn't so much that I disliked them but that I didn't read them as a romantic relationship for most of the time I've known the ship existed (I'd always read Cas as ace). It's only been since the show ended that I think my idea of what makes a ship had widened to more than just "stereotypically romantic" which recalibrated how I saw them.

Do you have any ship that, in the past, would’ve been considered normal but now you would be cancelled over?

Incestuous (Thor/Loki, et al,)? Teacher/Student(I blame ABBA)? Torturer/Torture subject (Hydra Trash Party)?

What is your favorite crack ship?

I will certainly have come across crack ships that appealed to me, but honestly if the writer/artist sells it well enough then I stop thinking of them as crack ships and instead think of them as rare pairs.

What is the couple you read the most fanfics about?

Currently? HeiHua. Overall? Stucky.

What do most of your ships usually have in common?

Someone to be vulnerable around, someone who understands you better than anyone else, "you're not alone anymore"

What do you absolutely hate in a ship?

If I don't like a ship it's probably more to do with a singular character I don't like than the couple itself.

Tagging @gaiahenshin @fangdoubing @epicwalrus @tazzy-ace and anyone else who wants to!

[samdyke]

I think Meg works as the destiel third bc Meg gets to torment dean which makes up for the fact that cas is more obsessed with him and dean feels in competition with Meg so he strives to be better to cas.

Not sure I can really see it working out in canon since Meg killed jo and dean isn’t gonna forgive that but the same is true of cas’s feelings towards crowley after he killed Meg

The other ones don’t really work because cas never met any of them and thus it’s less “destiel’s third” and more “dean’s two partners” and even though he knows Benny cas is constantly trying to kill him with psychic beams of solid jealousy

i think dean would murder suicide all three of them before entering into any kind of triple dynamic with meg. + i dont think meg:cas is equivalent to jo:dean emotionally as far as a roadblock to potential thirds via their killers but i PERSONALLY cant forgive meg for assaulting sam so im a bit of a hater and i dont really vibe w her dynamic w cas anyways. also! cas did meet several of the other options or at least observed them from a distance and i dont think that makes them better options but he does know like. crowley, benny, jo, mick, kelly, and lisa (observed) so the only ones he doesnt know are uhhh cassie and donna? has he met donna? icr. regardless my conclusion is still crowley because he fucked both of them so obvious link there