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#i text first I try to initiate conversation!
a-b-riddle · 1 day
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In the mood to write angst. Imagine you’re the conscientious observer who accidentally sees how your team talks about you behind your back.
Your morals were… complicated. You didn’t believe in killing anyone. Your faith told you that killing someone is wrong and even if it’s to save your life, handling a gun is something that doesn’t sit well with you. You’ve been to gun ranges. Mandatory for your position in the military that you have basic fire arm knowledge. But having something in your hands that could so easily take a life made you uneasy.
You were pescatarian, but tried to limit meat. Cried anytime you saw chickens in those trucks heading toward their demise. You fed stray cats around your house back home. You tried to be kind and cherished life in all most of its forms. The exception being garlic butter shrimp that was too good to give up and anytime of bug resembling a cock roach. And yes, palmetto bugs were still cock roaches.
And wasps.
Fuck wasps.
At the same time, you were pro-choice. Initially, you were pro-choice for other women, but you didn’t think you would have the strength to get an abortion. It wasn’t until you were holding your friend’s hand as she got her D&C that your views on your own body autonomy changed. It didn’t have to be medical to be necessary.
But you still refused to hold a weapon. Which is why even though you were a very talented medic, you were always judged for not carrying any sort of defense while in the field.
But no one on base would dare say anything to you about it. At least not to your face…
You got stuck instructing a training seminar when your phone continued to buzz in your back pocket. But even with the consistent messages, you didn’t falter by showing the newest members how to give basic first aid until health could arrive.
Nearly two hours later, you finally fish your phone out to see what’s going on.
Dozens of text messages in a group chat between you, Captain Price, Johnny, Kyle and Simon. You had gotten close to them over the last few months. You were halfway through your contract and were already dreading leaving knowing they were staying behind until the job is done.
You open it, your phone taking you to the first unread message.
Cpt.: Hows the arm healing up?
Soap: Fine. Hen did a good job of keeping the sutures nice and even. Should barely scar.
Gaz: Wouldn’t have a scar if she just fucking carried.
Soap: You think she honestly would even know what to do with a gun if you gave her one Garrick 😂
Ghost: Still think she’s a liability. Someone who won’t raise arms against an enemy isn’t meant to be on the team.
Cpt: Already tried. Laswell says we need the numbers. As long as she does her job there’s nothing I can do. We can’t be down a medic and it’s either her or nothing.
You shook as you continued reading the conversation.
Liability. Coward. It went on and on about how weak you were. Why couldn’t you just carry a small pistol instead of expecting everyone else to keep you safe.
It then switched to your personality. No one should be that happy. Annoying. A yapper. Couldn’t get a word in most of the time.
On and on they went until you realized they spoke so freely because they didn’t realize you were in this group chat. What did they say when you weren’t around?
You felt like a fool having extending more than just trying to be a civil coworker, but a friend. Taking on tasks that weren’t your responsibility simply to help them.
Getting a floral arrangement delivered for Johnny’s sister after she had given birth. Talking on the phone to the nursing home where Price’s mother resided trying to sort out her insurance. Taking priority Kyle when he was injured after falling out of a plane (both times) over your other patients. And always having the electric kettled going in the morning so Simon could have his tea without waiting too long.
You were helpful. Just because you had one boundary didn’t mean their words held any merit. But still you couldn’t help the deep feeling of just… betrayal? Rejection? You weren’t sure there was a word fitting enough to sum up how utterly stupid you felt.
Maybe they were right. This wasn’t a civilian setting. This wasn’t just life and death for your patients, but for you. You were out in the field with no form of protection except from others.
You weren’t abandoning your morals. You couldn’t. Not when every fiber of your being told you to remain steadfast. There was only one solution.
You didn’t have much to pack. Uniform was issued to you. Your stethoscope and some other tools came out of your own pocket. Your laptop, phone, charges. You packed all your lounging clothes and miraculously everything fit into a military duffle. Which wasn’t actually anything impressive given how big those things are.
You were confident in your decision even if it made you feel like a failure.
As you stood outside the office door you returned back to the group chat. One by one you proceeded to block all of them. You knew when you left the group they would know that the notification would pop up and they either wouldn’t give a shit that you finally knew what the actually thought of you or they tried messaging you to make amends to cover their asses. You weren’t sure which was worse.
Once you had blocked the last one, you left and knocked on the door that you had been idling in front of. A faint ‘come in’ was granted before you walked through.
“Hey, Kate.” You greeted. “Can we talk?”
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inkats · 1 year
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yup talking to people is too stressful how do y’all have like. Conversations. How do you make friends. I don’t talk to anyone regularly. I have like one “friend” (if I only have one short text conversation once every like. 3 months is it friendship? I don’t even see her anymore she’s moved away) and it was mostly her doing to heavy pulling to get this far. I’ve known people since literally kindergarten and I don’t think we’re anything more than acquaintances? Sunday friends as smoker on the balcony would say.
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megumi-fm · 4 months
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#the secret to making friends is to let yourself annoy them#this is a joke but im also being completely serious#all my life I've been too apprehensive to make the first move because im always afraid of being bothersome#but looking back at the friendships through the past 4years at uni... im so lucky that a lot of people didn't worry about bothering me#and decided to come up and initiate conversation anyway#and also. whenever anyone has 'bothered me' by asking about me or wanting to know more... I have only felt loved and special...#so i guess what im trying to say is that#cringe culture is dead and theres nothing cool about prioritizing how you appear over the potential of a real bond#and I was born to be persistent and curious#so yeah. now that my graduate program will start in a couple months and there are opportunities to get acquainted with my classmates#I reach out to people with no attempt to hide my enthusiasm in getting to know them.#I double/triple text a lot and annoy them (affectionate) like i do my bffs and its incredible how 9/10 reciprocate that energy so quick#and despite the cultural differences and minor mistranslations/miscommunications we still manage to find common interests to discuss about#and it's like '!!!!!!! we're besties now'#yeah sure sometimes people might get a bit uncomfy and by the second message if i feel like I'm disturbing them I back off#but i won't know that until i reach out in the first place. so all in all this has worked really well for me and i love itttt#megumi in the tags
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cryptidscene · 1 year
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Kinda wanna kill myself!!!!!!!!!
I KNOW nobody reaches out to me because im such a fucking Debbie downer. I KNOW that people don't ask how im doing because im always doing BAD ive been in a BAD PLACE ever since I moved out of my house and even before then!!!!!!!! I grew up in a bad place, all I know is a bad place!!!!!!!!! And no one wants to fucking hear me complaining anymore!!!!!!! I know im an annoying piece of shit!!!!!!!! I hope I make all this internet stuff and then I DIE!!!!!! At least then my life wasn't completely WORTHLESS
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if there's one thing i hate more than slackers in group projects its goddamn hypocrites
#this guy did jack shit for two full weeks when we're building the damn prototype#but STILL brought up the fact that most of our team blew off a report till the last minute in the beginning of march#*prototypes don't work* “sEe tHis iS wHy wE nEedEd tO hAvE a cOnvErsaTioN aBouT MS3”#like hon you lost the rights to the “y'all need to contribute more” argument the moment you left me hanging for 2-3 FUCKING WEEKS#like excuuuuuse me you been prioritizing extra curriculars all week get off your high horse stop lecturing everyone else about contribution#he made maybe 3 contributions? maybe?#first he 3D modeled an adapter and sent it to someone else to print (couldn't even do THAT himself smh)#then he sent the gc a sketch of an idea i roughly proposed literally the NIGHT BEFORE as his own contribution (that I ENDED UP BUILDING#then he...screwed on a few pipe fittings and called it a project :)#would be a LOT less pissed if he didn't show up to One Thing outside weekly team meetings/class#then apologize for slacking off BUT then launch into a FUCKING SPEECH ABOUT HOW HIM BEING HERE PROVES HIS COMMITTMENT#all because he DOESN'T LIKE GETTING UP EARLY. like sir. sir i am rIGHT FUCKING HERE. i was up till 4-5am working on this stfu#we've been building for three weeks and he's come into work on stuff wo me there ONCE for an HOUR#for context id spent about fifteen hours in the shop alone working on the fucking thing that WEEK#like im trying to be understanding ik tech week is hell#but i took “stepping back” as “i only have a few hours here and there to be in the shop and will do the writeups”#NOT “won't show up outside meetings AND we're splitting slides and writeups 80/20”#like id been in the lab all fuckin day and notice we have an assignment due (missed a SINGLE meeting due to exam)#and i ask him if theres anything i can do (and im thinking like look it over maybe add a spec or two)#and this fucker has the AUDACITY to ask me to write the full four paragraph summary cause he#*checks notes* copy-pasted some specs from milestone 3 so of COURSE its only fair that despite the fact I've been in the lab ALL DAY#that i write the four fuckin paragraphs too#course we're troubleshooting and he's like “did you clean the pump? did you disassemble it and rinse it?” like yes???#i did EVERYTHING i could think of before i even bothered texting you cause i know you're fucking useless#and then he raises fifteen different concerns which while valid would have been NICE TO HEAR WHEN I SENT YOU MY INITIAL DESIGNS#y'know BEFORE i spent over fifteen hours of my free time building this damn thing#with slackers i just pick up the work and move on with my life this idiot is trying to gaslight me into thinking that he contributed fairly#when i heard “i need to step back due to play stuff” i thought we'd be splitting it like 65:35 NOT FUCKING 95:5#and now hes probably going to give ME a poor peer review because I've been passive aggressive with him in the few meetings he showed up to#like i got shit going on too? how the fuck does he expect me to respond to being abandoned to do this shit myself
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honey-doc · 5 months
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Why I appreciate Kabru and Mithrun's relationship in the story (with pictures!)
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I just want to express how much I loved reading through the chapter with the 6 days they spent together and how I think their relationship developed in a pretty sweet way.
I feel like a lot of people reduce their dynamic to "nurse and patient" and that makes me sad because I personally got a lot more from it than that.
I do wanna start off by saying I'm here appreciating their dynamic as it is in the text.
Read more (spoilers ofc):
The beginnings
When they first met, there was an air of intimidation surrounding Mithrun as the captain of the ominous Canaries. He demonstrates his proficiency as a fighter and leader which worried Kabru because he knew it would lead to the dungeon falling into elven hands once again. But this threatening aura begins to dim in Kabru's mind as they get to know each other.
Even before they fell down the hole, the both of them ended up relying on each other's abilities a number of times (when the underground governor turned out to be corrupted Mithrun defeated him and Mithrun needed Kabru's deduction skills during the battle on the first floor) which is already the beginning of a great dynamic
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(Kabwu is scared but Mithrun just asks for his help)
After Cithis tasked him with "taking care of Mithrun's needs" for the time being, Kabru treated Mithrun with proper respect and doesn't take advantage of his disability, even using his title “Captain” when he knew Mithrun wouldn’t have cared either way after learning about how he lost his desires. This is in contrast to Cithis who immediately took advantage of her position to mess around with Mithrun when she was taking care of him.
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(When Cithis was put in charge of taking care of Mithrun)
The whole time Kabru is with Mithrun, he treats him like a person and more than just someone to be taken care of, as also he relies on Mithrun's fighting skills, knowledge of the dungeon, and teleportation magic.
When you reduce their dynamic to just "caretaker and patient", you're ignoring Mithrun's own capabilities and making him seem totally helpless. It actually feels rather ableist. They have a more balanced relationship with what Mithrun brings to the table than you may think. Mithrun couldn't have survived down there on his own, but it's the same for Kabru (who famously dies every time he fights)!
Kabru doesn’t show signs of trying to manipulate Mithrun either, and he's no longer intimidated by him in the slightest once he learns he’s not a threat or after his life. Though he does instinctively revert to his "sparkly" persona to get Mithrun to eat the disgusting mushroom, it doesn’t work so Kabru just has him eat it normally and never tries it again. This is the beginning of Mithrun unintentionally encouraging Kabru to be more honest with others.
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(Kabru realizing he can chill out)
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(Kabru being unreserved and Mithrun being silly)
bonus funny moment:
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Bonding
Throughout the journey they talked to each other, shared things with each other, and ate with each other. And Kabru expresses genuine concern about whether Mithrun is comfortable (which is something he could live without and wasn't something the Canaries told him to do).
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(Kabru showing he wants to make him comfortable by making food for him which is a very important part of the narrative)
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(Kabru sharing intimate memories with Mithrun)
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(Kabru initiating conversation without hesitation or worry. This part also is referencing how Mithrun shared very important details of his life with Kabru. Kabru also ends up trusting Mithrun with information about Laios despite knowing he could possibly tell the other Canaries about him and impede his plans..which he does lol they do end up knowing about Laios before meeting him.)
For a bonus Lycion implies Kabru was taking better care of Mithrun than they had been which is interesting to me.
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Mithrun also shows that he has come to trust Kabru's decisions over the Canaries' when he says he wants to stay in the dungeon after fulfilling the caretaker requirement. They did talk to each other a lot, during that time. I wonder what Mithrun's Shapeshifter double of Kabru would look like now?
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Here, Kabru goes out of his way to make sure Mithrun doesn’t overexert himself by knocking him out after the demon leaves with Marcille (again, when his time taking care of him is already over), and I think that demonstrates an extra level of concern he holds for Mithrun.
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(Kabru holding back a hellbent Mithrun)
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(KNOCKOUT!)
He even managed to make Mithrun mad. It's probably because he "let the demon get away" but I think it's cute and funny because would he huff like that at anyone else? Lol
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When the demon breaks through the surface
Kabru begins panicking after Laios turns into the giant monster because he's wondering if he made the right decisions etc. If Mithrun didn’t care about Kabru at least a little bit, he would’ve just left him alone when he started losing it (right after Marcille did the same thing and she is technically more to blame for empowering the demon than Kabru was for not allowing Mithrun to go after it), but he went out of his way to snap him out of it.
It also means a lot to me that Mithrun even says Kabru's name, because in Japanese you can go your entire life without referring to someone by name and it wouldn't sound wrong (just rude) and it's the first time Mithrun says Kabru's name on screen (I checked).
Though it was with a slap, I think it says a lot, because if Mithrun didn’t care at all he wouldn’t have done anything and left him alone. It's not like Kabru could've done anything to stop the demon. He didn't even to tell him to do anything even though Kabru looked ready for an order.
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(To be honest I don't know exactly why Mithrun starts beating him up here but you can say it's another rare demonstration of emotion Kabru was able to evoke in him lol. Maybe it's payment for Kabru stopping him the first time. That can be interpreted as paying it back and/or paying it forward I think.)
The last few chapters
And in the end when Kabru’s motivating Mithrun to continue living his life, he speaks to him like they’re friends/have no rank between them despite using the Captain title for him the whole time. Even Lycion initially gets upset that he’s acting “too familiar” with Mithrun.
It feels like Mithrun changed so much in the short time he spent together with Kabru and before the final battle, and it’s thanks to Kabru that Mithrun finally starts to be able to move past his lingering obsession with the demon and begin to really heal.
This is despite the fact that he spent so much time with Milsril and the other elves who never managed to break through to him like that.
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(Before Kabru) (After Kabru)
And even after his role as Mithrun's caretaker was loong complete, he still shows concern for Mithrun and tells him to take a break when he's using up all his magic to slice the Falin meat (lmao).
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He didn't need to do that! But it shows how he at least slightly considers Mithrun some kind of friend.
It all culminates with Kabru helping Mithrun regain his wil to live and Mithrun confiding in Kabru. Their relationship is important. Kabru continuing to do things for Mithrun to me is more of a sign that he just plain cares about him. Isn't it normal when a friend needs medication for you to remind them to take it? I think it's like that.
Kabru is there with Mithrun when he comes out about his feelings of uselessness AND when Senshi helps him put a spin on the 'vegetable scraps' metaphor and he find meaning in his life again. He's the first one to see him cry :')
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Along with the fact that it feels like Mithrun is the first person we see Kabru doesn't feel the need to change his personality with or put on airs for since Mithrun doesn't need buttering up and he won't get offended if someone were to say something socially awkward, I think they made a pretty good team!
BUT ALSO the REAL reason I became endeared to them is cute shit like this:
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GOD I love them!!!!! There are so many funny sides to Mithrun Kabru was able to bring out, and really show his charm as a character. Mithrun also brings out the best in Kabru while Kabru’s the most genuine he’s been since his debut with Mithrun. We are able to see that he’s just a kind and caring person, rather than the shady obsessed guy most fans have come to believe him to be.
The true depths of their dynamic also grew on me over time :)
TLDR
All in all it’s so nice seeing how even though Mithrun is a really deadpan person, and Kabru is a really secretive and withheld person, they clearly seem to have developed some kind of bond while they traveled together and even changed each other to an extent.
Doesn't Kabru feel more honest near the end? Maybe it's because of how much he talked to and shared with Mithrun during those 6 days so candidly...because they taaaalked a looooot like wow.
They mean so goddamn much to me. I don’t need them to be in a romantic relationship but I do want them to be together forever :'))) or like at least hang out when they have off time since they're still in the same country lol. Praying for Kui to make another side comic of them some time (crying).
Thanks for reading if you made it this far, I mostly arranged this because it makes me sad to see people reduce their dynamic to only one singular aspect.
Anyways ya...love 'em (heart hands)
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pnutbutter-n-j-elyy · 3 months
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They unknowingly bring up an insecurity Seungmin|Pt1
Pt2 Pt3
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Your heart was strung in your throat. Seungmin was always one to tease; and for the most part he was good about shying away from topics you were sensitive about so no problems had ever arisen. But as you read over his texts over and over again you felt your heart pinch in a way that was all to similar to what you had felt in your previous relationship.
"You talk too much, you know that?" Your ex had told you that numerous times, and eventually it led to a break up. And your constant yapping became something that made you insecure.
But when you first met Seungmin you felt like you were perfect the way you were. Chan had said you would balance Seungmin out quite well. And up until now you felt as if that were the case.
Now you wondered if maybe you did become to much.
Maybe the constant chatter had become annoying to the quiet boy you loved dearly.
And while you had been in love numerous times before, it hurt more to even think of losing Seungmin than all your previous heart breaks combined. And that was a lot considering you had always been the one to have your heart broken.
You couldn't tear yourself away from your phone screen - rereading those texts and overanalyizing the tone.
Maybe it was in a light hearted way? Or maybe it was the complete opposite and it was fully aggression?
You sat there trying to pick apart every single meaning, connotation, and tone the words he sent could have when your phone dimed again.
"I'm guessing your busy shopping since my phone has been quite for more than fifteen minutes. Haha, I think that's a first!"
You did everything in your power to try and bite back the knot in your throat from coming up and causing tears. So much so your eyes started to burn and you ended up shedding a few quietly.
The rest of the day you busied yourself with miniscule little tasks like dusting the fans and sweeping the welcome mat that you intended to take along with you when you moved in with Seungmin.
You tried to take your mind off of the texts. You figured Seungmin didn’t mean it in anyway malicious sort of way. In fact you knew he meant it as a lighthearted joke. In the time you had spent with him you had easily learned just how kind and loving of a person he was, and how much he cared for you.
You just couldn’t shake the hurt from those words - and more importantly the fear you had deep down that there was some truth to the words he had sent.
By the time Seungmin arrived at your apartment it was early evening. Every Wednesday you guys would cook together ever since you witnessed him and Felix blowing food up by accident on a live. Seungmin followed the normal routine of slipping off his shoes and into his house slippers and immediately changing into a cheap shirt he had bought when you first had started your endeavors since he was smart enough to realize he was a messy cook.
“Hey baby.” He said as he greeted you with a quick hug from behind and a chaste kiss to the cheek before he went to wash his hands.
You have a small noise of acknowledgement as Seungmin dried his hands off on a plaid towel and turned to you with happy anticipation.
“What are we cooking today?”
“Spaghetti and meatballs.” You replied as you started to grab the necessary ingredients. Seungmin followed you around like a happy puppy and helped you a carry everything to the counter you reserved for preparation of ingredients.
“So how do we start?” Seungmin asked. By now he had noticed your face was a little droopy and your responses were short and if there was any conversation it was only in answer to his initiation.
“With the ground beef.” You said as you pulled out a big bowl to put the meat and seasonings in. Seungmin watched you from his peripheral as you poured in some panco bread crumbs and a bunch of other various aromatic seasonings while he opened up the meat packaging.
As he kneeled everything with his hands he tried asking you about your day.
“So did you end up ordering the mugs baby?”
“No, I didn’t.” Silence.
“Oh…maybe after dinner we can look on Etsy together? Or maybe find a website to customize them? It might seem like a lot but I think the guys would really appreciate your sentiment.”
“Yeah, we can do that.” Silence.
Seungmin started to roll out oddly and unevenly shaped meatballs and continued to try and ask you questions as you guys worked, but your answers we short. Not rude. But literally short.
Not thouroghly explained like usual.
Even at dinner you were quiet and barely even touched your food.
“Do you not feel good baby?” Seungmin asked you as you played with a piece of garlic bread.
“I feel okay…maybe a little tired.” You said popping the piece into your mouth as if to show you were feeling fine.
Seungmin sighed and put his fork down.
“Did my text hurt your feelings?” He had been worrying about it all day when he had seen you had left him on read. It was an odd thing but nevertheless endearing when you would finish a conversation over text and send a meme to him just to acknowledge the end of the conversation, and to make sure he “didn’t find it hurtful” that you had left him on read. Even if he constantly assured you it was in no way shape or form a problem.
You hadn’t sent him a meme. And the more he thought about it he realized that his humor might not have translated through text.
“Im sorry if I hurt your feelings. It was a joke, Y/N. I would never purposefully want to hurt you. I love when you share about your day. I was a bit tied up so while you texting me might have been inconvienent at the moment doesnt mean I don’t appreciate you wanting me to know everything about what you are doing. I love that you want me to be a part of your life , even the tiny thing.”
“It’s okay babe.” You replied putting a smile on your face. “I know you didn’t mean it to hurt me. I’m just tired that’s all.” You let out a breath as you stood up and collected Seungmin’s plate. “Maybe we can just watch a movie instead of shopping? I just don’t feel like thinking very much right now in any capacity…” You let out quietly.
“Of course.” Seungmin responded, trailing you into the kitchen as you set the plates in the sink. “I love you.” He said quietly, his voice lilting up slightly. Were you actually okay?
“I love you too Minmin.” You place a a small kiss next to his eye and head towards the living room.
During the movie Seungmin kept stealing glances at you as you leaned on him but not into him. As you laughed but the curve of your mouth didn’t exactly reach your eyes. And how those same eyes were focused on the screen but your mind was obviously some place else.
Although you had said you were fine your silence gave him the answer you actually wanted to give. That Seungmin had struck a nerve more sensitive than he had known.
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awrkive · 9 days
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THE LOVE PROGNOSIS, pt. 2 — JJK (m.)
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for as long as you can remember, you’ve always been a hopeless romantic.
the girl who’s always dreamt of cheesy encounters with her soulmate, grand love declarations, and a cute little beach wedding to boot. but reality pretty much slaps you hard right on the face, because love, unfortunately, doesn’t come grand — it’s simple and it’s quiet, but it is quite painful, especially when the love that you’ve been seeking for all your adult life has just been right under your nose all this time.
PAIRING jungkook x female reader // mingyu x female reader
GENRE r18+ (angst, fluff, smut) MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!
CHAPTER WORD COUNT 27.5k
CHAPTER WARNINGS/MISC medical!au, roommates!au, surgeon!jk, surgeon!reader (they are both 4th year residents and are co-workers), corporate lawyer!mingyu, oc and jk are bffs since med school but their love language is fighting each other <3, jk and mingyu are bffs during undergrad, hopeless romantic!oc. shirtless jk in almost every scene ijbol he needs to get locked up, jk thigh tattoo 😔 a dash of sexual themes (ie: making out, grinding) and violence, this is pretty much MED SCHOOL LORE GALORE bcs boy, was there so much history mentioned here, 3/4 of this is in jk pov, so ladies.... prepare yourselves 🤔so much fluff, and we counter that with not major but not minor either ANGST, so many conversations and dialogues in this one lol, this hopefully offers every answer youre looking for from part one, when ur done reading the chapter this is how the keyring looks like
NOTES hi!! this chapter was supposed to be longer but i was like.. fuck that 😭 its getting too long. anyway. hope u guys enjoy this one!! this is my most favorite thing ive ever written i think n im weirdly very proud of this one idk. scream into my inbox and the reply section if u have #thoughtss 😄😄 [ important: pls make sure to read the note below ]
[ TLP MOODBOARD ] // [ SPOTIFY PLAYLIST ]
PART ONE | TWO | THREE
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You take your sweet time trying to right your wrongs.
After that day, you were the one to initiate a call with Mingyu which he answered thankfully (you were a little skeptical about him calling you that night). You went over to his place after your shift, apologizing to him for lying about your roommate situation. Admittedly, Mingyu still doesn’t seem to be wholly okay with it – but he doesn’t really say anything more about it. He kissed you better that night, his lips making you forget all about the stress that you’ve went through for the day, convincing you to stay over.
The night bled into two when he said he couldn’t let you go. Mingyu was persistent and you were unwilling to go in the first place. Partly because who didn’t want to spend more time with their significant other? But it’s also because of a certain someone that is no other than Jeon Jungkook.
Those two nights are going on four – which means that you’ve been avoiding Jungkook for the past three days now.
It doesn’t seem like a difficult task though because Jungkook seems to be doing the same. That was your hunch. He replies to you with dry-ass “okay”s when you text him about not going home because you’re staying at Mingyu’s. Nothing more, and nothing less.
Which is unusual of him. Sure, in your almost decade-long friendship, you’ve fought a bunch of times. But it usually gets resolved in a day or two. And Jungkook wasn’t ever cold like he is right now.
See, the regular Jungkook would find you anywhere on your floor at the hospital just to annoy you. When your time allows it, you eat together with your friends at lunch.
But now, he seems to always have something to do – which, okay, fair. He’s a surgeon, after all. But he doesn’t even spare you a glance whenever you two meet halfway in the hallways. Yesterday, you coincidentally scrubbed in together for the same surgery but he did not say a word to you other than, “Scalpel”.
The rest of your friends are already asking about it. Doyeon told you he had lunch with Jungkook this afternoon, but when she mentioned that maybe you were free to go with them, Jungkook suddenly had to look over a patient’s chart.
It’s not just a hunch anymore. He really is avoiding you.
And to be honest, you’re tired of the whole pussyfooting around. He’s being childish – and you’ll be the better person to come and talk to him about it. Granted, you’re three days late. But at least you’re doing it.
You texted Mingyu earlier this afternoon that you’re coming home to your apartment tonight. He was bummed about it, you could feel it through his message, nonetheless he replied saying he’ll miss you, which put a smile to your tired face from work.
When you went home from your shift at 9pm, Jungkook wasn’t anywhere in the house. Which was a shame – because you were planning to talk to him.
Well. Maybe you’d wait for him.
But it seemed like you underestimated your exhaustion for the day because as soon you finished showering, dressing yourself with your bed clothes which consists of comfortable flimsy camisole and panty shorts, you went straight to bed and passed out – forgetting about Jungkook.
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It’s past 2 am when you feel yourself waking up from your deep slumber, stomach grumbling at the emptiness, and you realize you did not only forget about waiting for Jungkook but also about eating dinner.
Walking out of your room, you head straight to the kitchen where you immediately go to open the refrigerator to see if there’s something in it you can consume. There are boxes of Chinese food take-out which makes your eyes light up. When you open to smell them, it seems that they’re still new.
You deduce it must be Jungkook’s.
That gives you the predicament of whether you should eat it or not. You take you’re not exactly on good terms as of the moment – therefore you can’t eat his food. But you’re really hungry.
Throwing away your inhibitions, you open one of the boxes, not even bothering to heat the food.
“Hey,”
You almost jump upon hearing another voice. Looking to your side, you see Jungkook approaching, with only his boxers on, upper half naked.  
“H-hey,” you say, pursing your lips into a thin line. “Are these yours?” You point to the take-out box in your hand.
Jungkook nods and heads straight to your direction. Taking one of the boxes, he hauls himself to the kitchen island, twisting his body so that he can face you.
“Yep.” he responds, dipping his fingers inside the box and taking out strands of noodles from it.
You wince at the sight. “Look like worms.”
“Just like worms.” Jungkook grins, chewing on them in that obnoxious way because he knows you don’t like noisy eaters.
Frowning, you decide to follow him to the island and haul yourself on top of it as well, sitting beside him. Jungkook scoots to the side to give you more room.
“It’s kind of like eating naengmyeon, I don’t like naengmyeon.” You tell him, opening another box and feeling delighted to see untouched stir-fried rice. “Did you just buy this earlier?”
Jungkook nods. “Left them in the fridge when I realized I wasn’t too hungry.”
“Then you woke up feeling hungry?” You smile at him.
He chuckles. “Yeah. When did you get off work?”
“Nine. You?”
“Twelve am.”
You grimace at that, but nod in understanding.
There’s a beat of silence before Jungkook speaks up again.
“Didn’t expect to see you here tonight.”
“Just wanted to remind you I’m still your housemate…” you joke, brushing your elbow against his arm in a teasing manner.
Jungkook laughs as he shakes his head. He picks up another batch of noodles in his fingers and then offers it to you, prompting you to arch your brow at him. “Try it.”
You shake your head. “I hate cold noodles.”
“Just try,” He insists, placing it closer to your face. You scrunch your nose, skeptical. It makes Jungkook chuckle lowly. “Head back.”
Hesitantly, you tilt your head back and open your mouth as Jungkook puts the noodles inside it. You almost choke on it when Jungkook laughs mid-way, making you laugh as well, but thankfully, you were able to chew all of them just fine.
“What the fuck.” You frown, slapping his arm good-naturedly.
“Wasn’t so bad, huh?”
“It was bad.” You say, going back to eating your fried rice. Jungkook gives you a look that says he’s not convinced. Looking at his face, you roll your eyes, “It’s like eating–” you stop mid-sentence as Jungkook quickly wipes off something on the side of your lips. It’s so quick though that you brush it off just as instantly and continue, “—literal worms.”
“Imagine if worms tasted like noodles. Wouldn’t that be sick as hell?” Jungkook muses, stretching his arm over you to reach for another take-out box on the counter. It’s so sudden that your immediate reflex was to stretch your upper body backwards, feeling a little taken aback when Jungkook’s face gets a little too close to your stomach, with his arm rubbing over your bare thighs.
He seems like it doesn’t move him, though. Just goes back to his position casually and opens another box. As he does, you can’t help but take a quick look at his bulging thighs, the short length of his boxers letting you get a brief view of the tattoo that peeks out of the expanse of his skin. You’ve seen that before many times, but not the entirety – of course not. It looks like it goes up from way above. Anyway, it’s sort of like a flower, but you’re not sure. You never really asked him about it. He never brings it up either.
“Oh, man, the dumplings got cold.” Jungkook picks inside his box as if he’d miraculously find one that’s not cold.
You roll your eyes at his antics. “You stored them in the fridge for like how many hours now?”
Ignoring you, Jungkook takes out one dumpling, trying to eat it, and you watch as he visibly winces. In a moment, he shoots one straight to the trash bin across from you.
“Oh, that’s real mature.” You say dryly.
With that, Jungkook throws another one, giving you a cheeky grin when it lands in the bin successfully for the second time.
Pursing your lips, you sarcastically say, “Wow. Two points to Xavier from Jeon Jungkook.”
That makes Jungkook look at you instantly.
“How the hell do you know that?” He gives you a look of confusion but there’s amusement written all over his face at the same time.
“Well… Mingyu told me you both played for the basketball varsity team back in undergrad, so,”
Jungkook stops. There’s look of something in his eyes that you can’t quite point out, but then suddenly, he nods.
“He told you how good I was?” He says with a teasing tone, a contrast to his sudden and quick drop of mood a few seconds ago.
You throw him a tissue. “Don’t be cocky. He just mentioned it.”
“I was captain. Two-time MOP, 2018 and 2019 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament.”
You look at him with silent reverence. Well, Mingyu didn’t tell you all that, that’s for sure. It’s a bit surreal to picture Jungkook wearing a basketball uniform, though. You’re so used to seeing him in scrubs and lab gown and his usual casual, occasionally suits when you attend formal conferences. You’ve only ever seen him sweat it out whenever he works out in the living room.
“Impressive.” You say. Jungkook grins proudly. “It’s strange I only know about it now, though.”
“You never asked.” He shrugs. “What ‘bout you? I only know you’re little miss summa cum laude.”
Huffing, you jab at his arm when he mentions it, rolling your eyes at him which only earns you a chuckle. Regardless, you tell him, “2018 NCA College Nationals. We won Coed Division One.”
Jungkook arches a brow. “NCA… National Cheerleading Association?” You nod, eating from your take-out box so as to avoid Jungkook’s look after you do so.
“No fucking way,” He says incredulously. “Seriously?”
“Yeah,” You bite your lip to keep yourself from smiling too much. You never really get to share this part about you with a lot of people. To quote Jungkook, they never ask. It’s funny when they do get surprised by it though, like he is now. When Jungkook stares at you – you don’t know if it’s just in disbelief – longer than necessary, you realize he’s staring at your face and that makes you consciously fix a strand of hair behind your ear. “Go big blue, go big blue, show ‘em what wildcats can do.” You sing a in fast tempo, chuckling about how silly it sounds.
Jungkook utters a sound of amusement. “That’s… wow. Right now, I’m just picturing you cheering but it’s a bit hazy and shit.”
“You’re saying you can’t picture me cheering?” You playfully accuse, but you know exactly what he meant. Even you still don’t believe that you actually did cheer in undergrad. When you signed up for it, it was just because you had to choose a club, and you weren’t interested in anything other than that. You thought cheering would be fun and it was fun.
“No, I’m just—” Jungkook cuts himself off and looks at you. “Okay, now I totally deserve a cheer for that two-point shot I made just now.”
You laugh loudly at that. Covering your mouth, you look at him to see if he’s joking but he seems to be serious.
“No.” You say, your eyes widening, body stiffening.
“Come on,” Jungkook chuckles.
You roll your eyes. “You have to do more than a two-point shot to get a cheer.”
“Okay, what do you want me to do?” Jungkook eagerly presents a challange. You stifle a laugh when he gears up for something. “I can shoot dumplings further from here with my left hand.”
“Ten feet away,” You muse, giggling when Jungkook suddenly gets off the counter, carrying the box of dumplings, and positions himself further away from you. Laughing, you shake your head before you say, “You can’t do it.”
“Try me.” He says as he begins to pick out a dumpling and concentrate on the trash can. Before he shoots, he tells you, “This one’s for you.”
You watch as the dumpling misses the bin.
Jungkook beats you to speaking first. “I admit. I’m a bit rusty.”
Sneering, you eat your fried rice, not straying your eyes from him. “You have to shoot, like, three dumplings.”
“That was a trial shot.” he insists, eyeing you playfully, before he gears up for another again. You watch closely when he makes a move to shoot another dumpling.
It goes in. Jungkook smirks at you when you look at him, impressed.
“Not bad.” You cock your head to the side.
“Tss.” He shoots another shot again and it’s successful for the second time. “That’s two.” Jungkook shows you his fingers and you chuckle at his enthusiasm.
“Let’s see if you can get the third.”
Jungkook nods, and you cover a snicker again at the way his stance suddenly turns serious, as if he’s really taking the whole thing seriously.
In a few seconds, he shoots the last dumpling straight to the bin just as successfully as the last time.
“What did I say?” Jungkook brags as he goes over to the island across from you, sitting on the high chairs this time. You turn your body to look at him, containing your smile. “Your turn now.” Jungkook says with a smirk.
Your purse your lips. “I’m a bit rusty.”
“So was I!” Jungkook claims which prompts a chuckle from you.
You look at him for a while, unsure. You close your eyes, bobbing your head side to side, covering your face as you suddenly feel a sense of embarrassment at the thought of dancing in front of him.
“Promise you won’t laugh?” You say after Jungkook tries to remove your hands off your face.
He raises his right hand and fixes his sitting posture upright. “Promise.”
“If you show your teeth I’ll stop and so will this friendship.” You threaten as you bring your legs over the island to his direction.
Jungkook chuckles while saying a series of “Yeah”s, holding your hand to help you hop off the counter safely.
You take a few quick strides to place yourself in the space between your counter and dining area and look at Jungkook who settles himself comfortably in the kitchen island chair, watching you with relaxed position and crossed arms.
Feeling uncharacteristically shy, you stand upright, suddenly aware that you’re only wearing a pair of panty shorts and a fitted camisole. You don’t work out so you’re a bit conscious in front of Jungkook who looks really good in his natural form. You don’t even understand how he finds time to go to the gym or do his little work-out sesh during some nights or weekends, but you shake away the thought and smile at him coyly. He has the better body, sure, but you know well enough he’ll never judge you for yours… besides, it’s just Jungkook. He makes you feel safe and secure, no matter the context of the situation.
Off the top of your head, you do whatever it is you remember from your college routines and begin your yell.
“Wildcats, get up and shout! We’re the team that’s gonna take it out! Give it all you’ve got, let’s hear you roar!” You chuckle mid-way, forgetting a step. “Sorry,” you apologize quickly, but then continue right away, trapping your bottom lip with your teeth to prevent yourself from completely losing it. “We’re the Wildcats, and we’re here to score! Go Big Blue! Go Big Blue—" You make a mistake again and skip a beat with your finger snaps, and when you look at Jungkook, you can’t help but give in to the laughter that’s been bubbling up inside you. “I can’t do it!” You say, cutting your “performance” short.
“What? It was good!” Jungkook says, encouraging you to continue further.
You stifle a laugh as you go back to the top again but then your mind forgets the next step and you’re messing up the choreography again. At that point, you start mindlessly cheering; jumping around and flapping your arms to make it look like somewhat of a cheer but none of the coordination. You know it looks messy, so you run over to Jungkook shamefully, plopping on the chair beside him. Bringing your legs up to the seat and covering your face in your thighs, you can’t help but giggle in embarrassment.
“Woah,” Jungkook says, but you can say there’s a hint of laughter in his tone. You know it’s not out of mockery when he lifts your head up and boop your nose. “That was cute. Best cheer I’ve ever seen.”
“You’re pushing it.” You hiss, kicking his knee slightly.
Jungkook captures your leg, and you squeal when he pinches your thigh. You both laugh at that and you thought Jungkook’s gonna let go of your leg but he keeps it on his lap.
“My stomach hurts from laughing.” You tell him, taking a deep breath, trying to regulate your heart. Everything feels funny. Your cheer was funny. You must’ve looked so stupid.
Jungkook chuckles. “Wildcats, get up and shout—”
“Jungkook!” You cut him off, removing your leg from his lap to kick him again on the thigh this time. That only prompts him to laugh louder.
When the high of the moment fades, Jungkook looks over at you.
“Do you feel sleepy?”
You shake your head. “Not really. At least not yet.”
He hums, and then takes your box of fried rice to eat from it.
There’s the silence again, but it’s quiet and comfortable. No weird tension sitting in the air.
“Jungkook,” You call him after a while.
“Hm.”
You clear your throat. “I meant to talk to you,” Jungkook stops eating and looks at you to acknowledge you. “I’m sorry.”
He stares at you for a moment. Then, he chuckles, shaking his head. “You know what’s funny? I was gonna talk to you yesterday to say I’m sorry but then you didn’t talk to me at all in the OR. I thought you were still mad at me.”
With furrowed brows, you tell him, “I thought you were mad at me. You only said “scalpel” in the OR and then that was it. No hi’s or hello’s in the hallways for the past three days.”
“Me? Mad at you?” He says, as if he can’t believe you would even think that. “I mean, you piss me off sometimes, but I don’t think I was ever mad at you.” You pout. Jungkook smiles. “I can never be mad at you,” His look is gentle and warm that you feel a little flustered for a reason unknown. It just ticks a little something in your brain, tugging something at your heart. Then, Jungkook sighs. “I’m sorry, too. For the way I went about it. The “bringing boys here” comment was out of line.”
There’s a wince on your face when you hear that.
That comment did hurt a little.
But you know it was just a heat-in-the-moment type of thing, and he just wasn’t able to think through his words well enough when he was… well, pissed – and rightfully so. Because you did something offensive to him, and you can’t blame him for feeling the way he felt.
You nod at Jungkook. “Thank you for saying that. I’m saying sorry because I realized what you said. I should’ve informed you I was bringing Mingyu home, and I should’ve told him about you being my roommate. We really could’ve avoided that situation.”
“You can just tell me beforehand if you’re bringing him to our place.” Jungkook shrugs.
You chuckle. “No. That won’t happen again.” And it’s true. It’s awkward and it’s rude when you have a roommate.
Jungkook looks at you. “Okay. I won’t do it as well,” You shake your head, playfully rolling your eyes at him. “I’m guessing you settled it pretty quickly with him?” He gestures at your neck and you realize he’s referring to the necklace you’re wearing – the one Mingyu gave you the very same day you fought.
You want to point out it’s not really new, but you settle with, “Yeah. Fortunately.” as a response.
“I really am sorry for what happened.” Jungkook says and you can feel the sincerity in his voice.
“It’s fine,” Touching his arm, you give him a small smile. “Have you and Mingyu talked?”
Jungkook shakes his head. Nibbling on your bottom lip, you think about how that’s… not good. They were friends before you and have just met each other again after so many years – you do not want to be that kind of person who gets in the way of some other people’s relationship.
And you really can’t have Jungkook not liking your boyfriend or your boyfriend not liking Jungkook, either.
But as much as you want to suggest that they talk it out, you know you can’t. Besides, you trust that they eventually will. They’re grown men.
“So…” you trail off. “Are we okay?”
Jungkook’s lips tilt upwards. “Are we okay?”
“Come on,” you roll your eyes. “Do we hug it out or like – I don’t know – handshake on it?”
“Let’s hug it out like we’re twelve.” Jungkook grins and in a moment, he scoots closer to you and wraps his arms around your waist, resting his head on your chest.
The angle is a bit awkward with Jungkook crouching too much you don’t doubt his position is anything but comfortable, but it works, and it gives you the opportunity to pat his head as you say, “I missed hanging out with you, buddy.”
“Can’t say the same thing.”
That earns him a slight pinch to the ear easily accessible to you.
“Ow!” Jungkook says and then add, “I hate to ruin the moment but… you’re not wearing a bra.”
You quickly grab both sides of his head to get him off your chest. He comes back sitting upright on his chair, laughing.
“Fuck off—” you flip him off and then look over your box of fried rice, but then you remember he was also eating it earlier. “You ate all of it!”
“Finders keepers.”
“I hate you.”
“Hm.”
You shake your head, standing up and starting to grab all the boxes to take them to the trash bin.
“By the way, I just got my approval from HR for our trip the next two weeks. Have you?” You ask him across the room. You can see Jungkook’s face light up at the mention.
“Yeah, of course. Got approved yesterday.” Jungkook grins. You watch as he stares at you a bit longer, his face showing a hint of confusion.
You arch a brow. “Why does your face look like that?” Jungkook shakes his head, obviously ready to dismiss it. But you’re persistent. “What is it?” You say, walking towards his direction and stopping in front of him.
“Nothing…” he trails off. Then he rubs the back of his head. “I just really thought that you…” You squint your eyes at him. Then he chuckles lightly and swipes his fingers through his hair. “I just thought the trip would be cancelled.”
Your eyebrows furrow. Frowning, you nudge at him. “What? Of course, not! We planned that trip like six months ago. I’m not backing out.”
Jungkook gives you a shy smile.
“Okay.”
You can’t help it. You bring your hands to his cheeks and pinch them.
“He’s so excited for his birthday trip!” You say, intentionally talking like you would to a toddler.
Jungkook predictably forces your hands out of his skin and holds your wrist a bit tight as he rolls his eyes at you.
“Knock it off.” He glares at you. But you’re not done with your fun, so you poke your finger to his waist, knowing that’s his weak spot, and tease him some more. “Seriously.” Jungkook huffs out and your laughter becomes louder because he looks like a grumpy child right now.
“Sorry.” you say, still giggling. He furrows his brows, and you can’t help it, you poke at his waist again. When you do it, though, Jungkook captures your wrist, effectively stopping another one of your juvenile assaults. Suddenly, you start noting the mirth in his eyes.
You’ve seen that look before and it always ends up with you almost dying from too much laughter because he always—
“You’re gonna regret that.”
You let out a squeal as Jungkook takes ahold of your waist, and before you can even voice out a protest, he easily hoists you up against his body, bouncing you up until you're hanging around his shoulder like a sack bag.
“What the hell, put me down, you prick!” You complain, slapping the rugged muscles on his back. But Jungkook just responds with a series of clicks of his tongue, carrying you across the living room.
You know he’s about to put you on the couch to tickle you to death, so you do what you could and bite down on the skin of his back.
“Ouch!” Jungkook immediately reacts, stumbling a little in his stride. You snort at that, but you immediately frown when you feel a slap to your ass.
“You asshole!”
“You just lowered your chances of being spared,” Was his last words before you feel yourself getting put down on the surface of the sofa. Soon after, Jungkook’s poking his fingers to your waist and stomach, prompting you to erupt in fits of giggles and laughter, thrashing beneath him like a caged animal.
“Pl—stop—oh my god!” You say, weakly reaching for his arms. When Jungkook doesn’t relent, you continue wriggling under him, laughing and choking, saying a variety of, “Stop! I’m —” giggle, “gonna—” then another snort, “—die!”
Jungkook chuckles. He torments you some more before finally stopping his fingers in their ministrations.
“You deserve that.” Jungkook says when you both came down from the high, laughing at the messy state of your hair and the way you try to catch your breath like you just ran a triathlon.
You breathe in and out deeply, clutching your stomach that still hurts from laughing.
“Fuck you.” You hiss, giving him the finger.
Jungkook bursts into laughter, and from his position in between your legs, he lets himself fall on top of you.
“Jungkook, no!” Pushing him off you, you try to get away from him but the goof just forces himself beside you instead, sticking his much bigger build in between you and the back of the couch. It makes you scoot near the edge as a result, and you hold onto his arm so that you don’t fall off, tangling your leg against his own for added support. Pinching his waist in which he lets out an ingenuine “Owe!” to, you face him as you say, “You are so annoying.”
Jungkook just gives you a shit-eating grin. “Who started it?”
“You almost killed me.” You say dryly.
“Don’t be dramatic.” He rolls his eyes.
Suddenly, you realize the position you are both in.
Your bare legs are intermingled against each other, Jungkook has one arm wrapped around your waist, and from the lack of clothes on both sides, you can feel pretty much everything.
There’s a weird feeling in the pit of your stomach upon the epiphany.
Jungkook’s looking at you with a playful grin, but as he notices you staring at him, he stills. From such close proximity, you can almost trace out the lines of his features. The scar on his cheek, the mole under his lip, and the pimple scar that was probably from a week ago. At that thought, you think about: if you can see him so close like this, he can also probably see you, and that’s when you break away from the contact.
“Shit.” You hiss as you let yourself fall off the floor by rolling around, away from his hold and touch and him in general.
Jungkook immediately scoots to the edge of the sofa to look down at you with confused eyes. “The hell?”
“Don’t worry,” you wave your hand at him.
He snorts. “Did you just fall?”
You roll your eyes. Of course, he’d think that. But you let him, standing up from the floor.
“Yeah, yeah, whatever you say.”
You hear Jungkook’s boisterous laughter as you walk towards the kitchen again, stopping in front of the fridge to get some water.
“You’re going to bed now?” Asks Jungkook, following you to the fridge and mirroring your activity.
Nodding at his question, you peer from the rim of the glass as you answer, “Yeah, I don’t want to be sleeping at the hospital later.”
“Fair.”
Soon after, you both decided to clean up a bit in the kitchen and when you finished, you two headed towards the direction of your bedrooms. It’s located just near the kitchen, with the doors located beside each other.
When you turn the knob open to your own door, Jungkook calls you, catching your attention.
You arch a brow at him, waiting.
“Good night,” Jungkook says. You drop your kitted brows and smile. You’re about to greet him the same but then he adds, “Also– that was a really great cheer.”
“Ugh, Jungkook!”
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You look across the bed to see Mingyu still on his laptop on his worktable, working on something. An hour and thirty minutes have passed since you arrived at his place, but you’re still not getting the least bit of attention from him.
You get it, it’s work, but he asked you to come over… isn’t it only fair to expect a little bit of something?
Getting up from the bed, you trudge over to his direction.
“Hi,” you say, ducking down to wrap your arms around his neck from the back of his swivel chair and kissing the spot below his ear.
“Hi,” Mingyu meets the kiss you give him on the lips. He reaches for your hands resting on top of chest and holds it there, looking at you. You delight at the hint of attention. “I’ll just be in a few minutes. You’re staying, right?”
You grin. “Of course.”
“Good.”
Rolling your eyes, you take your hands off him and stand upright once again. Mingyu rotates his chair so he can look at you with his undivided attention, voicing out a low whistle when he takes in your outfit – or lack of it thereof.
You arch a brow, knowing well he’s ogling you only in your bra and panties, squinting your eyes at him. Slowly, you glide your leg over his waist and plop yourself down on his lap, waiting for any protest from him. It doesn’t come, and so you give him a grin before planting your lips against his.
The kiss turns heated in a matter of seconds, with Mingyu squeezing over your bra and taking in your soft moans against his mouth, feeling the delicious roll of your hips against his crotch where you feel a semi growing already.  
“Sweetheart,” Mingyu grunts. When you don’t answer that, he cups your jaw, making you look at him. “__.”
“What?” You say, more like a whine, looking at him with hooded eyes. You’re starting to feel sticky in your underwear and you need him to do something about it.
“Not now, sweetheart. I told you, I’m working.”
You frown. There’s a beat of silence before you let out a sigh. “Okay.” You say, getting off his lap.
“I’ll take care of you when I’m done.” He promises, taking ahold of your wrist, looking up at you.
Pursing your lips, you look away. “It’s fine.” When Mingyu lets go, you look at the direction of the bathroom. “I’m gonna take a shower,” you tell him. “You’re free to join me if you want or whatever.”
You know he can’t and that he won’t.
“Alright.” Was the last thing you heard before you walked towards the bathroom door.
You’ve been over at his place too many times to count now, and you’re slowly building your shower essentials in his own bathroom. Your body wash, your face cream, your shampoo, your conditioner – even your moisturizer and your eye mask are already placed inside his bathroom cabinet.
As you step out of the shower box, all clean and fresh, you go over to the lavatory to brush your teeth. At the sight of both your cups sitting beside each other, you smile.
You look in the mirror – noting the way your lips can’t stop from curling up at the thoughts running inside your head.
Shaking them off, you grab Mingyu’s robe and put it over yourself, turning the knob around to step out of the bathroom.
You see Mingyu on his bed this time around, but his laptop’s still perched on his lap.
He looks up when he sees you. “Ready to sleep?”
You nod, feeling at home the way you automatically go towards his closet to pick out a shirt and some panties you left over the time.
As you’re in the process of dressing yourself, a phone’s ding rings in the room.
Looking at Mingyu, you watch as he checks his phone, assuming it came from him. When he puts it down, he looks at your plugged phone on the bedside table.
“What is it?” You ask, now properly dressed, walking to the bed.
You note the way Mingyu’s gaze changes as he hands you your phone.
“It’s Jungkook.” He says with a weirdly clipped tone. Then another ding comes. A beat, and then your phone rings.
Your brow shoots up, taking the device from him and checking it yourself.
Jungkook’s face is plastered over your screen – a picture of him wasted in his room two years ago, taken from your Thailand trip with the rest of your friends. He’s sleeping with his mouth open, shirtless in the middle of the hut, only covered up with his trunks. You remember setting it as his contact photo because it was funny back then. Jungkook hates the photo, and your friends always made fun of him for it.
Right now, though, it doesn’t feel the least bit funny. Not when Mingyu’s certainly saw it. Not when he looks a little put off as soon as he sees a glimpse of it when he was passing your phone to you.
“I’ll just answer this.” You say, standing from the bed again.
You don’t expect Mingyu to suddenly shoot you a question, “You can’t answer here?”
Brows knitting together, you give him an uncertain look. “It’s just Jungkook.”
“Yeah… so, why not here?”
You relent, seeing the point he’s trying to make. Plopping yourself on the bed again, you answer Jungkook’s call and put the phone over your ear.
“Jungkook,”
“__,” he sighs out your name, sounding relieved. “Thank fuck.”
“What’s wrong?” You ask, growing a bit concerned at his tone.
You can hear some shuffling from the other line as Jungkook tells you, “Did you see me with my pager in the locker room earlier?”
“Oh, uh… let me think…” you trail off, trying to remember the events earlier. As you do that, you notice Mingyu’s fingers trailing his hands to your bare legs, but you ignore it as you answer Jungkook, “I think I didn’t, yeah. I didn’t.” Jungkook hisses. “Did you check your car?” you ask, trying to help out.
“Already did. It’s not in there, either. I really think I accidentally threw it out in the bin along with some trash in my pockets.” He says, sounding a little distressed now.
“Well… you can always just go to the operator, you know? Get a new pager?” you offer. There’s a drop of kiss on your shoulder that makes you shudder, and you look at Mingyu with furrowed brows. He doesn’t say anything, though, just let his fingers trail upwards, his hand sliding under your shirt, gripping your thigh. Your boyfriend just gives you a sly smile, and you squint your eyes at him, confused at what he’s playing at. 
“I know. But, ugh, you know I lost two pagers already this year. Sungkyun hates me at this point—”
Jungkook’s answer suddenly drowns out when Mingyu grazes his thumb on your clothed clit.
“Oh.”
“—what?” Jungkook halts, asking about your abrupt reaction.
You bite your lip in an effort to shut yourself up, and when Mingyu’s hand makes another move again, your free hand shoots up to stop him.
“Hold on a second, Jungkook,” you say, quickly pressing mute.
Mingyu looks at you with a smirk, playful smile painting his face. “You know you can continue, right?”
At that, your brows furrow even further.
“What are you doing?” You didn’t mean to sound curt but with the way Mingyu’s expression changes, it may have sounded that way.
You… couldn’t help it.
“I wanted to touch you,” Mingyu tells you after a beat of awkward silence. Then, his hand retreats to himself. “Do you not want to?”
There’s guilt that springs up inside you when you see the look on his face as he says those words.
“No, I’m sorry— it’s just… I want to. I just… not with somebody on the phone?” You put it out like a question, unsure of yourself.
The room is quiet for awhile and suddenly there’s a thick tension that hangs in the air.
You reach out for Mingyu but then drop your hand to your sides when he moves to sit on the edge of the bed.
He turns his head to you with an unreadable expression on his face. “Is it because it’s Jungkook?”
You frown at his tone.
It sounded accusatory.
“Excuse me?” You say, taking immediate offense. When Mingyu shrugs, you feel a bit of annoyance bubble up inside you. “I would’ve still stopped you if it was anybody else on the phone, Mingyu.” you say, tone firm and leveled.
“I’m sorry, then.”
But he definitely doesn’t sound like it. His sarcasm makes you snap. “What’s up with you?”
Mingyu opens his mouth to say something but then he closes it again. You watch him with confused eyes, completely at loss of context where he’s at. The night was going fine as usual and suddenly, there’s this.
After a few seconds, Mingyu sighs. “What are you even talking about right now?” He glances at your phone.
“It’s—” you take a glance at it too. “It’s just his pager.”
“Pager?”
“Yes.”
“He asks you about his pager in the middle of the night, knowing full well you’re with me?”
“I—” you stop yourself, words suddenly getting lost in your tongue. Not because you don’t know the answer to his question, but because you hate the way he phrased it – and honestly, you’re starting to feel icky about how he’s going with it. What was he trying to do? Pin you down with accusatory notions?
You don’t fucking get it. Jungkook’s his friend. It’s so bizarre to even think about how Mingyu is seemingly acting jealous over his supposed friend.
“You know what?” You say instead, not wanting to discuss it further with him anymore. It’s just gonna lead to an unnecessary fight – and frankly, you don’t want to deal with his jealousy. It seems so… futile. “Can we just sleep this whole thing off?”
Mingyu looks at you and for the first time, his eyes don’t look gentle. He looks at you with a bit of a frown, and you get it. You do. You’re not exactly happy, either. Not right now, with the way he’s acting.
“Do you want me to go?” You ask, ready to step out of bed.
“I didn’t tell you to.” Mingyu says, voice equally strained.
You sigh. “What do you want me to do, Mingyu? Are you jealous, is that it?” You meant it to be completely rhetorical, not at all expecting him to say anything.
But he answers instantly. “What if I say I am?”
Your lips part. You’re surprised at the confirmation, but you shake your thoughts off it.
“Then it’s completely unnecessary,” you tell him, as genuine as you can sound. When Mingyu doesn’t move in his position on the edge of the bed, you crawl towards him. Testing the waters, you touch his arm to see if he would avoid your touch, but when you do rest your hand on his shoulder, he doesn’t stray. “I like you, Gyu.”
Cocking your head to the side, you watch as his face still sports a cold expression. But he says, “I like you too, you know that,”
“But…?” you try to get out the words from him, because you knew there’s more.
“I don’t want you to think I’m being irrational about this whole thing,” he starts, and you nod your head, trying to show him that you get it. Mingyu licks his lips before he continues, “I just… I guess I just want you to put boundaries around your friendship with Jeon.”
That makes you stop. Nevermind the strange way he called Jungkook by his surname.
“How do you mean by that?” You ask with furrowed brows.
“You’re just really close with him. And you live in one apartment together.” He points out.
“Mingyu…” you say, suddenly feeling tired all over again. “I thought we already talked about that.”
“Doesn’t mean I’m a hundred percent comfortable with it, you know?”
It feels like you got electrocuted by his words the way you quickly retreat your hands. “That’s…” you trail off, not really knowing what to say.
Thankfully, though, Mingyu interjects before you can slip into a dilemma.
“I know, I know about why you’re living with him and all that stuff. We talked about it. It’s just…” he reaches for your hand. Entangling your fingers together, Mingyu brings your knuckles to his lips and presses a kiss there. “I want you all the time. And I guess I really am just jealous – even though it’s juvenile. I’m jealous that he’s known you far longer than me.”
“But— I’m here thrice a week. I make time for the both of us. And it doesn’t really matter how long you’ve known me for, Gyu,” you respond truthfully.
He nods.
“I’m sorry.”
You shake your head. “No, I’m sorry. I guess I just— I got in way over my head that I also forgot to take your feelings into account,”
Mingyu smiles, and there goes his soft gentle expression again.
“I know. It’s fine. You don’t have anything to be sorry about. It’s me who’s being unreasonable.”
“No, it’s not unreasonable,” you tell him. “I get it. Boundaries, Mingyu. I know what you’re talking about.”
Mingyu scooches closer and presses a sweet kiss to your lips. You gladly bask in it, smiling against his lips, keeping your gentle gaze towards him as he breaks away.
“I’m sorry for being a bummer.”
You kiss him again and the way he inserts his tongue in your mouth distracts you a bit but you manage to break the contact. Soon, he’s lying down beside you and when you check your phone, your call with Jungkook has already ended, but there are two messages from him on your notifications.
[12:35am] jaykay🤠: are you still alive [12:38am] jaykay🤠: ok nevermind i’ll hang the call i actually found my pager just now 😭 [12:38am] jaykay🤠: it was in the kitchen counter LOL [12:45am] jaykay🤠: ok bye. night
You were going to reply but decide against it for some reason.
Putting your phone down to the bedside table, you follow Mingyu under the sheets and as usual, you face against his direction just like he does.
Unfortunately, he doesn’t really like cuddling that much. He’d share his space to a certain extent, just like how you got into his bed in the first place, but not the lengths of cuddling together in bed. Mingyu didn’t tell you why – and you don’t want to come off as clingy, so you don’t bother asking.
It’s strange, though. Now that he told you a while ago that he, apparently, “wants you all the time”. Shouldn’t he like to cuddle you in bed, then? But you don’t want to dwell in it too much, afraid that you may be digging yourself a hole if you were to keep it up.
As you lay your cheek on your folded hands, you play back the events of the night and think about how you’ve seen this film before.
When you were in med school, Eunwoo always had something to say about your friendship with Jungkook. He wasn’t direct with it, but with the way he never bothered to make friends with Jungkook or always had a grimace on his face when you mentioned him in passing, it was enough for you to conclude that Eunwoo was always… wary of Jungkook – and definitely in a jealous type of way.
He said almost the exact same thing as Mingyu – that boundaries should be built; that Jungkook and you are too close, why is he calling you in the middle of the night to ask about mundane things, why does he know too much about your mother’s preferences, and why is he buddy-buddy with your dad who otherwise always had an uninterested expression on his face?
It wasn’t even just Mingyu. Your past flings for the past four years you’ve been single always got put off when they heard that you’re rooming with a guy – even more so when you mention that he’s your bestfriend.
You’re not stupid to not see how it looks like from the outside perspective – and you’re not dense to not ever consider the possibility of something romantic brewing within the friendship. You have thought about it before – had an instant crush on him the first time you met at the law library back in post grad school. But it was fleeting at best, especially when Eunwoo came into your life a few weeks later.
Nayeon, Doyeon, and Taehyung have also hinted at it. Sometimes – most of the time, really, teasing you two, especially Taehyung. Even the most mature one among your friends – Yoongi – once told you both to get married at forty. He was joking, though he looked way too serious for someone who was just supposed to be joking.
And there was that one dreadful time in third year of med school when Jungkook almost kissed you.
You buried that memory in the very depths of your mind – not ever wanting to revisit it again. It was a bad time, and it was just not a good thing to look back at. Jungkook acted irresponsible, and you stupidly let yourself be complicit in it, even though you knew better.
Nothing even happened – but that memory was just that. A mere memory. You doubt Jungkook even remembers that himself.
Here’s the thing: you’ve just never seen Jungkook past the person you consider as a friend. You’ve never been weird about the women he dated – or if he dated, at all. He’s also always been supportive of your relationships… as far as you’re concerned. Regardless of what everybody says, you both seem to agree that you’re just better off as friends. You work better that way.
Jungkook’s a good guy, though. He does have tons of flings – but he’s just conventionally attractive and works hard for a body that is to die for. Women like that. Additionally, he has a stable job and even though he annoys you about splitting the delivery fee when you do take-out, he’s actually quite rich – or, his family is – he’d always insist.
You get it though. As a co-resident, you both don’t really make that much (for the work that you do) – at least not yet.
But he was indeed born in generational wealth, coming from a family of doctors, which is why it’s quite impressive that he knows how to handle his life by his own hard work. His intelligence and perseverance are some of the things you admire about him, his drive to make a name for himself and never leeching off his family’s name. Jungkook doesn’t ever brag about how his neurosurgeon dad is one of the best in the country and how his mom is a legend in cardiac surgery – even though sometimes, he could use it a little. He’s playful yet charming; quiet when you’re just knowing him, but he’ll eventually talk a lot when you get close.
As a friend, he’s quite the best you’ve ever had.
And even though you don’t really see him past that, you know in your heart that whoever ends up with him romantically will be a very lucky person.
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“You’re a pussy.”
“Doyeon.”
Doyeon huffs, rolling her eyes so hard at Taehyung’s reprimand and then goes back to glaring at Jungkook again who just looks at her with a pathetic expression.
“What? I’m right. He’s a pussy and you’re an even bigger pussy for defending him being a pussy.” She says, furrowing her eyebrows angrily.
“Why are we talking about pussies?”
Nayeon suddenly enters the on-call room and Jungkook nearly has a heart attack.
“What the hell, you should at least knock. Jesus.” Jungkook says, clutching his chest, looking at Nayeon with an almost offended expression who closes the door behind her.
“Were you scared it was __? See!” Doyeon sighs out in frustration. “Such a fucking pussy.”
“Such a fucking pussy,” Jungkook mocks, using a higher pitch to imitate Doyeon poorly.
“And a child too.” She rolls her eyes and throws him a pillow. It misses Jungkook and hits Taehyung instead.
“Seriously, what are you so mad about today? You have that mood. Did you and your secret boyfriend fight?” Taehyung spits out.
Everybody stills in the room when Doyeon gives him a sharp glare. That pretty much makes everyone shut up, especially Taehyung who makes a show of physically zipping his mouth.
Nayeon fakes a cough and trudges towards Jungkook sitting on one of the beds. She throws her heavy hands on his shoulders, more like slaps, and then looks at Doyeon as she asks, “What are we calling this man a pussy for?”
“Oh, ask him. Or his dumber best friend.” Doyeon rolls his eyes and looks at Taehyung, crossing her arms and leaning her back on the chair she’s sitting on from across the room.
“You’re starting to hurt my feelings and I hate you.” Taehyung says from the other bed.
“Why?” Nayeon ignores their banter and furrows her brows at Jungkook curiously.
Jungkook hisses under his breath. “It’s nothing. She calls me a pussy for literally everything.”
Doyeon butts in. “Yeah, are you gonna cry?”
“If __ was here, she’s gonna be on my side, you know that?” Jungkook rebuts.
“If __ was here, you’d be panicking because she’ll know about your little secret.”
“Oof.” Taehyung comments.
“Oh, Jungkookie…” Nayeon looks down at him with worried eyes. When he looks up with a sad look, she starts rubbing his shoulders as some sort of comfort, already knowing about what this might be about. “This is about… the thing?”
He nods weakly. “Yes. And no. Uh, well, this is… you know about the birthday trip in the next five days, right? So, she asked me if she could bring, uh, Mingyu along.”
“Oh.” Nayeon utters, looking at Doyeon for confirmation.
Doyeon nods, and then nags, “Ask him what he said.”
Nayeon looks at him. “What did you say?”
“I said yes.”
“Oh.”
Jungkook looks down in slight shame at Nayeon’s reaction. She completely stops her hands’ ministrations on his shoulder, indicating that even she could not believe what he just did.
This makes Jungkook even feel worse.
Leaning his elbow on his thighs, he runs his fingers through his hair as he says, “I mean, how could I have said no? I would’ve looked like an asshole. Besides, Mingyu and I are college friends. There’s no reason for me to prohibit him from this trip. Like, at all.”
“Yeah, you and Mingyu are college friends but, ultimately, it’s our trip, right? __ would’ve understood if you said no.” Doyeon says, still not over her justification from a while ago.
“I know, I know. But still… I didn’t want to say no to her.” Jungkook tells Doyeon, not having a lot to say more than that.
It’s the plain truth, anyway. He truly, simply does not want to say no to you. Not ever.
“But Jungkook…” Nayeon interrupts. “Would it be okay for you? We know how you feel about the whole – er – Mingyu thing. Can you really take them being close together? Especially on a trip for your birthday?”
Though Nayeon’s voice is soft and her gaze gentle, her words hit him like a ton of bricks.
Truthfully, he doesn’t know what to feel about the whole thing. You dating Mingyu is one thing, but you bringing him along on your trips is another. It means that he’s it.
That you’re getting serious.
He hates himself for hating the idea. Jungkook’s always wanted to be nothing but supportive of you. He’d done it perfectly well with Eunwoo before, and your flings in the past four years have never upgraded past to being solely flings so he never worried about them, but now with Mingyu… it’s hard to pretend like it’s not killing him when you talk about how much you like him.
You have that lovestruck look on your face when Mingyu comes up in a conversation. For the first time in a while, you look genuinely happy. Jungkook always thought that your feelings for Eunwoo still lingered over the past few years – and how could it not, when you were literally engaged to him for a year? You told him one time that he may have been your greatest love… and he fears that it might be the same with Mingyu.
Where does that exactly leave him?
“What I think doesn’t really matter. And it’s just for week.” he murmurs, but the others hear it anyway.
“An excruciating week, you mean.” Doyeon says. She stands up from her chair. “You know what, I’m over this whole thing. I’ve witnessed you pine over her for whole eight years – and I’m just – I’m moving on from this. And I have a surgery. I’m going out.”
Jungkook grimaces when Doyeon heads towards the door.
“Doyeon, don’t be mean to Jungkook. He’s trying his best, you know? The timing is just not right and—”
“What timing?”
As soon as Doyeon twisted the doorknob, pulling the door open to completely head out, you came barging in, cutting off Nayeon’s words.
Her eyes widen a little at your sudden arrival. And Jungkook scrambles to think of an effort to swerve the subject, but Taehyung beats him to it.
“__, heyyy,” he prolongs the word quite unnaturally, chuckling at the end of it for no reason. Jungkook internally notes to tell him later never dare try to save anything ever again.
That makes you furrow your brows in confusion. Directing your look to Doyeon who stopped on her tracks, you ask her instead, “What’s going on? What about Jungkook trying his best?”
Doyeon looks at Jungkook and then you. You wait, but then she just rolls her eyes – just completely done about the whole thing. Like she said earlier.
“He’s trying his best not to be a pussy – well, allegedly.” At that, she goes out of the room, ignoring your calls to pull her back in.
“Uh… I think I have a surgery in twenty. See you guys around. Gotta scrub in.” Taehyung jumps from the other bed and Jungkook makes sure to extend his leg forward so that the older guy trips on it as he walks. “What the fuck, man.” Taehyung looks at him, offense written all over his face.
Jungkook gives him a glare. Taehyung chooses to ignore it rather than prolong it and walks past you at the door.
“Bye, fuckers.”
“Don’t call me a fucker!” Nayeon chimes in but Taehyung’s already out of the room.
“Hey, seriously! What was that?” You head towards the bed where Jungkook and Nayeon are, situating yourself on the far end of the bed to lean on the frame. You take off your sneakers in one swift move and lay your feet on Jungkook’s lap.
“It’s nothing. You know how Doyeon always bullies me…” Jungkook says, ignoring the tingling sensation that starts to creep up his spine at the way you casually initiate physical contact.
He needs to get a grip. You most probably don’t really mean anything by it.
“She does not bully you.” Nayeon rolls her eyes beside him.
“You probably deserve it.” you say, pulling out and eating some strawberry yogurt.
Nayeon laughs at your remark, but then it’s cut short when a pager suddenly beeps. Instantly, all of you take out your own and check if it was yours.
“Alright, that’s my call.”
“Bye. Good luck.” You say, offering your cup to Nayeon, but she only shakes her head. Meanwhile, Jungkook gives her a pair of thumbs up.
When Nayeon leaves the room, you nudge Jungkook with your foot.
“Hey,”
Jungkook looks at you with a brow raised.
“Can you rub my foot? Please rub my foot.” You say, making the best rendition of puppy face, extending your sock-cladded foot in his direction.
He scoffs. “Do you think I’m a pushover?”
You gasp dramatically. “I do not! I think you’re a cool person who’d totally give me foot rubs.”
“Unfortunately, I’m not a cool person who would give you foot rubs.”
You groan. “I gave you a massage weeks ago.”
“That was, like, two months ago.” Jungkook says drily.
“It counts because you didn’t do anything to repay me for my kindness.”
“Oh, you need your kindness paid back?” Jungkook teases, wiggling his eyebrows at you.
You pout at him and then whine. “Please, just three minutes, I swear. I’ll even put up a timer.”
Indeed, Jungkook is a pushover. Pushover to your cute pout and every request. Again, he could just not find it in himself to say no to you. Not even in his wildest dreams.
But it’s never not fun to tease you before he relents. “Fine. Two minutes.” He says, pretending to begrudge the thought of giving you a foot massage, even though inside, he’s quite thrilled to be doing so.
It would be a lie to say that it isn’t one of his favorite past times in the quiet evenings of your apartment. Jungkook loves the weight of your leg on his lap, loves the way you thank him in between groans, and loves that he just gets to be close to you in almost such an intimate way.
“Your feet stink.” Jungkook decides to tease, scrunching his nose, feigning disgust.
“Don’t lie. Also, your feet stink even more, don’t try me.”
“My feet do not stink.”
“Let’s just agree to disagree,” You grin. “I’m starting a timer.” You say, grabbing your phone, pressing some stuff on it before you put it on the mattress.
“Let me see, for all I know, you set it to five instead of three.”
You look at him with widen eyes, stiffening.
“It’s three minutes.”
“Your nostrils are flaring, you’re lying.”
You groan. “Please. Dinner is on me later.”
That obviously catches Jungkook’s attention.
“You’re staying at home for the night?”
You look at him weird. “Yeah, of course. What’s with that face?”
Jungkook shakes his head, hides a small smile as he looks down to your feet on his lap and takes a hold of one. He takes off your sock for you and begins massaging the tendons of your foot, noting the way you immediately lean back and relax.
“Nothing. I just thought you’d be staying at Mingyu’s again.”
“Ah,” you nod your head. When Mingyu's name is mentioned, you visibly frown. It’s the kind of face that you make when you’re deep in thought. “I was supposed to. But I don’t know… we fought this morning.”
Jungkook raises a brow. “You wanna talk about it?”
You shrug. “Not really. It’s a weird argument. I don’t know.”
He wants so badly to poke around and find out… but somehow, there’s something in him that tells him not to bother.
Anyway, you’re going home tonight so that’s all that matters. Jungkook begins to think about what to eat for dinner… he’d love to cook something, nevermind that he’s tired from his overnight shift yesterday. He also only got around four total hours of sleep in the past 48 hours, and that was not even consecutive hours – just the sum. That is why he was in the on-call rooms, until Taehyung suddenly barged in, followed by Doyeon, Nayeon, and then you.
“Oh– there, that’s so good, Jungkook,” you say after a particularly hard press against the ball of your heel.
Jungkook knows better than to let his mind wander upon hearing that from you. He’s massaging you, of course that was gonna be the natural reaction.
It’s also quite pathetic to be even thinking about it in the first place – considering that your mind might most likely be weighed by yours and Mingyu’s argument – your boyfriend.
“Hey, about what I said a few days ago,” you started to speak again, breaking the momentary silence. Jungkook hums to acknowledge you. “I know you said yes to me bringing Mingyu along, but, uh, I’m not sure if he still plans to.”
“Ah,” Jungkook nods. Was the argument that bad? “Okay.”
“Yeah. He has to fly over to Arizona for something that week. Told me he may be able to arrive and join us on the second day, which is the exact date of your birthday, but honestly, I’m not sure. His sched changes a lot.”
Deep down, Jungkook wishes Mingyu just opts out of joining in altogether.
But he doesn’t have to tell you that.
“That’s a shame.” he comments, not really meaning it. He massages your other foot with ginger hands, which has you letting out soft sighs again. Jungkook buries them in the back of his head, lest his mind goes to territories that are absolutely humiliating.
“I know…” you trail off. You look like you have more to say as well, but then the door to the room opens. Again.
“Forgot my pager.” Doyeon announces, crossing the room with quick steps to reach for the forgotten thing she left on the table.
When Doyeon’s gaze falls back to the both of you, she raises a brow, and then her eyes direct their way towards Jungkook’s hands on your foot.
You’re about to say something when Doyeon rolls his eyes at Jungkook. Then, without giving you the opportunity to speak, she heads out of the room quickly, leaving Jungkook to look in another direction in quiet shame.
“What was that?” You comment, confused at what just happened.
“Eh, she’s in a sour mood today. It’s regular Doyeon.” Shrugs Jungkook, trying to swerve the subject.
You pout. “Are you two fighting again for real?”
Jungkook chuckles. “No, it’s not serious. You know how Doyeon and I get.”
You squint your eyes, but say nothing nonetheless.
Meanwhile, Jungkook hisses internally.
Jungkook gets Doyeon. You all have been friends since freshman year of med school – the founder of your study group – and she was also the first one to find out about Jungkook’s little crush. He didn’t even have to say it explicitly, she just knew. Eventually, Jungkook told Taehyung. He has quite a big mouth, unfortunately, so when you started your internship at the hospital – he lets it slip in a conversation with Nayeon who was just becoming your friend that time – leading the situation to where it is right now.
Out of all of them, though, Doyeon got it pretty hard. She’s witnessed the early stages of Jungkook’s infatuation towards you in the first semester of med school, had to keep quiet during study sessions. She was even supportive that time, telling Jungkook to just go for it – but then Eunwoo happened, and the confession never saw the light of day.
When they broke up, Doyeon became hopeful again, just as Jungkook was. But you were showing no signs of moving on and Jungkook had no choice but to step back for a bit.
The past two years, though, Doyeon became more insistent, telling him you’re single and it’s the fattest chance Jungkook can ever get.
But she’s right, after all. Jungkook’s a pussy. He hides his feelings well – a pro at the sport, really, at this point.
When Mingyu happened a few months ago, Doyeon’s just over it. She told Jungkook one time in a drinking session that the ship has sunk and he’s going to be in his sixties regretting not ever confessing to you. Sometimes, he wakes up at night in sweat from a nightmare that involved Doyeon murdering him because of his emotional constipation.
Jungkook knows she just wants the best for him – even though she’s more on showing him tough love instead of a gentle one. Doyeon’s always been like that, but she’s a good friend. When things went haywire, she was there to genuinely sympathize with him and console him – together with Taehyung and some of his other friends.
But in Jungkook’s defense, Doyeon just also doesn’t get it.
It’s so easy to just say fuck it and make a confession already, so easy to think about how things could turn positively – but she’s not – they’re not – in Jungkook’s shoes. They will never be.
So many things could go wrong if he ever were to listen to his heart. Sure, he’s had the chance over the past four years – most would say that. But it’s not a chance when you’ve spent half of it moving on from Eunwoo. It’s not a chance when you spent the other half trying to go on dates and fail – each one making you more miserable about your love life, as you told him so many nights ago in those rare special moments in the balcony of your apartment.
Those four years you were single was never a chance – not when you never showed any bit of interest.
It’s the reality that his friends always somehow miss when encouraging him to confess his feelings.
You’re friends for almost a decade now – eight years to be exact – but not once did you ever hint at wanting to be in a relationship with him. Your reaction to that always involved a disgusted expression and a variation of “No way!”. Might be a joke just to tease him – but also might be rooted in something genuine deep down.
Jungkook likes to think that physically, he doesn’t look so bad. He’s nice when he wants to be, especially towards people he cares about. He’s a resident surgeon who makes enough. Could be funny, charming… whatever.
Most of all, he likes to think he could deserve you one of these days. That he could be the man that you’re searching for.
But it’s been eight years and you’ve never once looked at him like how he surely does at you.
God knows how many times Jungkook has tried to move on – how many sleepless nights he has trying to erase the feeling of so much longing for you. Sometimes, it works, when he’s on his casual dates and hook-up with all those women that thankfully fancied him enough. He momentarily forgets about your laugh and your hair and the crinkles on the sides of your eyes when you smile and your soft hands and your gentle voice – but it cracks when the sex is done and he’s staring at the blank ceiling of his date’s apartment, hating himself for yet again seeing your picture in his memory when he’s buried in somebody else, wishing it was you instead.
It hurts so badly. Especially when you seem to look at everybody else except him. You wanted to weed out someone for you – meanwhile, he’s just right under your nose, and yet you don’t see him. It’s at this point, when you have Mingyu as your boyfriend now, that Jungkook is starting to realize that you don’t see him not because you can’t, but because you choose not to.
Regardless, he knows you love him. Knows you care about him on a deeper level. Would probably sacrifice a bit of your time to tend to him if he needs it. But it’s the kind of love that’s not comparable to the one he has for you. Jungkook’s feelings encompass every single kind of love a human could have for another being – but you only have one kind for him. The platonic kind.
And even though it’s painful to face the reality of that very idea, Jungkook thinks that maybe… just maybe… Mingyu’s actually it.
Mingyu wasn’t exactly a saint the last time Jungkook saw him, but people change and the way you seem so genuinely happy these days tells Jungkook that maybe Mingyu’s another version of himself now – the better one who will never hurt you or make you cry.
Maybe this is what love’s all about. You’re content with seeing them happy, even if it’s not with you.
Jungkook thinks that as he steals a glance at you looking at your phone – most probably playing that landlord game on your phone you’ve been obsessed with the past few weeks – and you’re so beautiful like this. Even when you’re probably running on limited hours of sleep just like him.
Your hair is put up in that tulip hairclip you have a lot of, stray hairs framing some parts of your face. But he sees your features just fine – notes the way they are structured so perfectly it truly awes him that men and women didn’t beg for your attention whenever you went out in public.
Because he would. He did. He does. He always teases you for the purpose of your reaction… because Jungkook likes it when you pay attention to him. So much that it kills him to think that maybe, that attention will die soon as you and Mingyu get closer as another week passes by.
The timer that goes off on your phone snaps Jungkook out of his thoughts, and you look at him with widened eyes.
“Don’t st–”
“It’s my turn now,” Jungkook cuts you off and gently places your legs on the mattress, bringing his own on the soft surface as well.
You jut your bottom lip out – and Jungkook feels himself wanting to give in.
“Five minutes is so quick.” You say, but nonetheless takes his shin to your lap.
Jungkook tries hard to sway the butterflies in his stomach at your touch.
“Favor for a favor, remember?” He teases, lifting one of his foot to your direction.
You pretend to gag. “I hate you.”
Jungkook laughs, quite boisterously. Because he knows you don’t mean it. I hate you basically just means I love you but you’re annoying me right now in your own little dictionary – and he always gets giddy whenever you tell him that – as weird as it may sound.
But Jungkook likes this, though.
Sure, it would be so fucking great if he could just confess and lay out his cards all at once, but the chances of you not taking it well is too big – and even though Jungkook’s usually a risk taker, he couldn’t ever risk you all over his dead body.
He can keep his hurt to himself over you feeling anything but romantic towards him – because if he confesses and you don’t feel the same way, he knows damn well that he’ll lose you completely.
And the thought makes him shudder.
That probably catches your sight, so you ask him about it.
Jungkook tells you it’s the AC.
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[ DAY 1 | August 31st, 11:04am ]
The beating sun feels uncomfortable on Jungkook’s skin, but there’s no way he’s wasting a day like this holed up in the villa he and his friends chipped in to rent. It costed you all a shit ton of money – might as well enjoy every waking day he gets to spend here.
It’s why he decides to goad Taehyung and Nayeon into coming with him along the shore where sun loungers are lined up to accommodate the few visitors who were also at the resort. He tried to convince Doyeon, but she goes straight to sleep as soon as the rooms were assigned.
He gets it – you all did travel by plane instead of car (because that would've taken you twelve hours) and Doyeon gets airsick whenever she rides in a plane. Jungkook also tried to talk you into it, but you said you were just going to lounge about by the pool at the villa and follow after a while.
Your “after awhile” takes about thirty minutes, and Jungkook thinks you’re missing all the fun, especially when Nayeon and Taehyung are starting to strip off their clothes to submerge themselves in the ocean.
With his loaded watergun, he goes straight back to the villa, and it doesn’t take much time to spot you by the terrace, lying down on a sun lounger with your big hat and sunglasses on, a book opened in your hands.
Unsuspecting, you let out a sudden squeal when Jungkook presses the trigger of the toy in his grip, a spring of water meeting your bare legs. Jungkook obviously tries hard to ignore that you’re wearing a flimsy pair of white bikinis. He saw you pack it two days ago… and he remembers taking too long to move on from the image he’s conjured up in his head upon seeing it.
“Jungkook!”
He chuckles at your reaction, poorly hiding the watergun behind him. “What?”
“I’ll kill you.” You seethe, your body coming forward to sit upright, hastily taking your sunnies off so he can see the cute glare on your face.
“What are you going to do? I have this,” He points to his weapon. “Are you challenging me into a hand-to-hand combat?” Jungkook teases, wiggling his eyebrow.
You groan. Then, you lay back on the lounger again, opening your book, deciding to ignore him.
Jungkook can’t have that, of course. So, he walks closer to your direction, stopping beside you, effectively blocking the sun and in turn, dimming the light source of your book.
“You’re blocking my sun.” You say, looking up at him.
“You’ll get all the sun you want if you haul your ass off to the shore. Come on, we’re all swimming in there,” he tries to convince you, nudging your thigh with his knee.
You give him a pout. You sound whiny when you say, “But it’s too hot.”
“That’s why we’ll get in the water.”
“Don’t be sassy.” You roll your eyes. “I meant the water would be way too hot.”
“It’s not, Nayeon said so.”
You glance at the pool across from you. “Why can’t we all just swim in here?”
Jungkook deadpans. “Because this is a five-foot pool and absolutely no one will enjoy it.”
You frown at him, quietly telling Jungkook he’s right.
“Ugh,” you groan. “But I’ll have to reapply SPF first…” You grab the bottle of lotion that’s just placed on the small table on the side of the lounger. Then you look at him with squinted eyes, “Did you wear sunscreen?”
Jungkook rolls his eyes but nonetheless says yes, knowing how you always nag him about it whenever you guys are at the beach. It’s not even just him. It’s also with your other friends.
He watches as you rub lotion over your body, but when you get to the back, you look up at him and extend the bottle towards his way.
“Can you help me with this, please?” You say.
Jungkook automatically takes the bottle but it takes him a full five seconds to understand what you’re getting at.
You’re asking him to put sunscreen on your back. You’re very naked back that sports nothing but the tiny strings of your bikini holding your chest.
Of course, you don’t notice his dilemma. Twisting in your seat so that your back faces him, you gather your hair to the side, obviously waiting for him to do your request.
But Jungkook’s distracted behind your back. He’s distracted at how smooth it looks under the scorching sun and how easy it would be to paint it with something other than the natural color of your skin.
It’s not even the first time he’ll do this – you’ve been to trips before and putting on sunscreen over your friend is about as natural as it gets like how he would do it as well to Taehyung or even Doyeon or Nayeon if they ask to.
But it doesn’t mean it doesn’t affect him one bit when it comes to you.
Needless to say, his mind is pre-occupied as he sits down behind you where you left some space for him to sit, squirting the lotion into the palms of his hands, gingerly spreading it over your back once he got it.
“Be sure to cover everything,” you say, obviously not aware about Jungkook’s mental crisis behind your back.
He thinks it’s worth the crisis over though, as you’re so soft under his touch. Jungkook kneads the span of your back, squeezes your waist lightly to even out the cream, and makes sure to put it over your shoulders as well. When his hands fall, he hesitates.
“Should I – uh—”
“Yeah, just go under the strings.” You tell him before he can even finish.
There’s a lump in his throat that he swallows before he goes under the strings of your bikini top, his heart doing funny somersaults against his ribcage as he spreads the lotion over your skin. It guilts him to no end that his mind thinks about how he’s just inches away from your breasts.
He retreats his hand right away. “Done.”
You turn back to him. “Thanks. You want me to do yours?”
“Sure.”
Jungkook sits on the edge of the lounger and lets his back turn to you. He hears the cap of the lotion bottle being opened again and soon your hands are lathering the cream over the expanse of his back.
It’s embarrassing the way he lets himself savor the seconds of your every touch. Embarrassing the way his mind zeroes in on the way your soft hands caress the tendons of his back muscles. He thinks about the weight, how good this feels; your hands on him. Suddenly, there’s a zap of electricity that goes through his spine, and then he feels it.
The twitch in his dick and the blood that he feels rushing to it.
“Okay, you’re done.” You say, tapping his back twice so he can turn to you.
It snaps him out of his thoughts, but his dick is thinking about something else and as he subtly looks down, there’s already a growing semi on the crotch of his trunk shorts.
Jungkook curses himself internally, shutting his eyes close in slight frustration.
Fucking uncooperative dick.
He stands up from the chair when you nudge his back with your foot, thinking that he’d see you coming along in a few seconds. But you don’t, and as he turns his heel to look at you, you’re back in your cozy lying position on the lounger, with your book opened, just like how he saw you when he came in a while ago.
Jungkook parts his lips in disbelief, but also finding the whole thing funny.
“You minx.” He muses, playfully squinting his eyes at you upon realizing the trick you just pulled.
“Enjoy the beach, Jungkook. Send my regards to Taehyung and Nayeon.” You say, giving him a taunting flying kiss. “And thank you for reapplying my sunscreen.”
Jungkook chuckles at your remark, and just like that, he forgets about his stubborn dick, and goes over back to you, blocking your sun once again.
“You’re blocking my sun again— Jungkook!”
It’s predictable the way you hurl a series of creative curses at him as Jungkook forcefully picks you up from the chair, knocking your hat and your book on the ground as he hoists you against his shoulder, carrying you upside down like a sack of potatoes.
“Jungkook, I swear to god!” You squeal, repeatedly slapping his back as he walks to the direction of the shore, but Jungkook’s nothing but a solid muscle, firm over his hold on the back of your legs.
“Be quiet.” He says, chuckling at your sounds of opposition.
“I hate you, you’re such a prick, ugh!”
He picks up his walking pace and you scream again when you see the ocean water from your view.
Jungkook chuckles as you continue to plant your fists on his back, and when the water reaches his knees, he throws you in it.
“Fuck. You!” You say, glaring at Jungkook in the middle of his uncontrollable laughter.
“Come on, Taehyung and Nayeon are over there,” he points to the deeper part of the ocean a few feet from where you are, and when you turn your head, you see Taehyung and Nayeon with their floaties.
“Ugh…” Jungkook hears you groan before you follow behind him. When Jungkook looks back, he sees you paddling around the water like some puppy, and he snickers to himself. That earns him a splash on his way, with you rolling your eyes at him.
“Jungkook! __!” Yells Nayeon over their direction, waving her hand around. Taehyung and her are perched on the big floatie they fought over with at the villa earlier.
“Jungkook,” calls you behind him.
You’re starting to cross the deeper part of the ocean and it’s within Jungkook’s chest now. Meanwhile, your friends are still about a few feet away, so the level would definitely be on his neck by the time. You’re considerably tall, but Jungkook’s still half a head taller than you, so when he looks back at you, the water’s already reached your shoulders.
“This is way too deep!” You complain.
“Don’t be a pussy, __!” Comments Taehyung from afar.
“Fuck off,” you murmur and then beckons Jungkook to you. “Help me a bit here.”
Jungkook shakes his head, chuckling as he moves a few steps back to get to your direction.
“You big baby, you never learned how to swim, have you?” He teases, playfully clicking his tongue.
“What for?” You say when he gets near.
Jungkook feels pleased with himself about you asking for his help to cross the deeper part of the ocean, but he’s met with surprise when you heavily plant your palms on his shoulders, causing him to be out of balance and tripping over his feet under the water.
It causes a misstep and he nearly chokes as he comes back up for air again only to see you laughing your ass off. Nayeon and Taehyung are also laughing along, even from afar, and Jungkook wipes the back of his hand over his eyes to see clearly.
“That’s for throwing me in the water earlier,” you say in between your snickers and Jungkook’s just about to say something back when you suddenly wrap your hands around his neck from the back, your legs locking around his waist. “Carry me to the floatie, pretty please,” you say against his cheek in a sing-song voice.
With that, Jungkook feels your whole entire body against his back, your breasts pressing against his skin. He ignores the way the physical contact makes his body tingle, and he hopes you don’t notice his blush when he raises his arms to hold the back of your legs.
“Only because you’re annoying.” He pretends to sound annoyed, but the laugh that comes out of you at the remark makes him smile anyway.
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[ DAY 1 | August 31st, 11:35pm ]
Your daytime activities at the beach included jetskiing – one that knocked Taehyung off the water way too many times that he just gave up halfway through it. When Doyeon woke up a little later in the afternoon, all of you decided to get food from the dining hall and ate your hearts out at the buffet.
The day ended with all of you back in your assigned rooms again. Since you rented a two-bedroom villa, Jungkook’s rooming with Taehyung in the secondary bedroom while Nayeon, Doyeon, and you are all inside the primary one since it’s bigger.
It’s past thirty minutes to eleven in the night when somebody knocks on Jungkook’s shared bedroom with Taehyung. When Jungkook looks at him from across the room, he’s knocked out on the sofa, soft snores coming out from his mouth. Him and Jungkook decided to take turns with the bed itself throughout the whole vacation. There’s an extra cushion Taehyung could’ve laid on the floor, but he was way too tired to set it up and to even care – looks like he doesn’t really need it, though, since he looks so peaceful in his position.
Grumbling, Jungkook gets out from the sheets, scratching his bare chest and rubbing the back of his head as he walks over to the door to open it.
When he does, he’s welcomed by the sight of you in your big grey hoodie and some shorts.
“Wear something.” You say as soon as you take in his appearance.
Jungkook’s habit of going to sleep with only his boxers knows no bounds. Even when it’s below 20 degrees Celsius outside, he always opts out of his pajamas, choosing to go bare in his sheets instead. In his defense for now, the duvet is thick and it provided him with enough protection against the cold of the AC and the summer night.
“What are you doing here?” He says as he trudges back inside the room to wear a pair of sweatpants hanging from the chair.
“Rude.” You comment, following him in the room. You look at Taehyung’s passed out state in the couch. “He’s going to wake up in the evening tomorrow and miss your birthday.”
That makes Jungkook smirk, remembering Taehyung’s high energy in the morning.
“No consequences. It’s vacation week.” Jungkook raises his eyebrows. “Seriously, what brought you here? It’s almost midnight.”
You sit on the edge of the bed. That’s when Jungkook notices the black plastic you’re carrying in your hand. “It’s not that late. Let’s head out for a bit.”
He raises a brow, confused. “Where to?”
“You’re going to find out. Wear a jacket, it’s a bit cold outside.” You say as you stand up from the bed again, heading for the door.
Jungkook’s confusion just grows with passing seconds. Nonetheless, he can’t say he’s not intrigued.
Unsure, he goes for his small luggage and takes out the only hoodie he packed. It’s grey as well, matching the one you have on. Jungkook tries to shake that thought off his head as you both quietly head out of the room.
It’s late into the night and when you head out of the villa, there’s not many people hanging along the shore anymore.
“Follow me,” you tell him, and Jungkook does.
It may have been his drowsiness that kept him quiet throughout the whole walk – just quietly following along with you, your rented villa no longer in his line of sight. Jungkook couldn’t exactly pinpoint where you currently are, but this side of the beach is a bit rocky, and much, much colder. He feels it even through the thick material of his hoodie.
“We’re here.” You announce, a proud lilt to your voice. Jungkook bumps with your back when you suddenly stop on your tracks. It prompts a chuckle from you, turning back to him so Jungkook sees the crinkles on the sides of your eyes as you do so.
It makes his lips curl. “What’s this?” He curiously asks, looking around.
Your grin grows wider. “We’re gonna take those stairs and it’s gonna lead us to some pretty view.” Jungkook looks to the direction you pointed at, seeing the stairs you just referred to. Still unsure, he glances back at you. You laugh. “You remember when Doyeon and I went out for a walk earlier for a bit? We found this place.”
Jungkook nods. “I see. Thought for a second there you found a place to dispose my body at.”
You snort as you take Jungkook’s wrist to hold on to as you climb to the stairs.
“I won’t do it as such a public place.”
“So, you really are thinking about it in the first place.” Jungkook nods his head, guiding your back up the jagged stairs. You manage to get to the smoother surface and Jungkook’s quick to follow you towards the straight path of the narrow walkway.
“It’s my favorite past time, really.” You look back at him cheekily, a playful grin painting your lips. Jungkook scoffs.
The hallway is colonnaded with some flags, and there’s an edge where the concrete stops, the ocean water splashing against the big rocks beneath the broken bridge.
You set aside the black plastic you’ve been carrying around and Jungkook realizes they’re Smirnoffs. Sitting on the concrete, you let your feet hang on the edge.
“Hey, be careful,” Jungkook comments as he sees you do that. This part of the ocean isn’t necessarily far – where you were earlier when you were swimming was far deeper, but still, it could be dangerous if you make a mistake. Jungkook wonders what the designers of the beach thought about when they made this plan.
“Come on, don’t be fussy. Sit here with me.” You say, patting the space beside you.
Jungkook follows, of course, and you scoot to the side a little to give him more room.
“It’s nice, right,” You look at him, cocking your head to the side.
Jungkook feels the breeze of cool wind passing, and it’s a bit strong that it moves his fringes and yours as well. You put your hair up as usual in that big metal clip you always wear, but some strands of your hair escape and they frame your face.
With your big hoodie on and smile, Jungkook thinks you look extra cozy. He may have been hot and bothered by your bikini ensemble earlier, but now he’s bothered for another reason. He can’t stop thinking about cuddling you under the night sky full of stars at the very moment.
“Feels good.” Jungkook comments. He plants his palms on the hard surface of the concrete behind him, leaning back as he looks to your side. “You wanted to drink here?”
“Oh, yeah,” You say, twisting your body a little to pick up the plastic cellophane. You take out two bottles of Smirnoffs and offer one to him which he gladly takes. Taking a bottle opener out, you’re about to open your drinks when Jungkook offers to do it for the both of you. You don’t protest, just let him do his thing, smiling when he hands you your Smirnoff.
“This is really nice.” Jungkook sighs after he takes the first sip, looking straight ahead to the mountainous view in front of you.
You hum, seemingly enjoying the moment as well. Jungkook takes a quick glance at your side profile and then quickly looks back ahead when he feels you do the same.
“Why’d you bring me here?” He asks.
“Nothing. I couldn’t sleep, and I thought I could bring you here. So.” You shrug.
Jungkook nods.
“I’m turning thirty-one tomorrow. Or, in an hour, actually.” He says, automatically looking at his wrist but then realizing he took off his watch and left it at the bedside table. He didn’t take his phone with him either.
“I know. You’re so old now.” You tell him with a teasing tone in your words.
“Fuck off,” he snorts. “I’m only a year older than you.”
“Hmm… still old. Imagine, you turn fifty, I would still be forty-nine.”
Jungkook laughs at that.
“Whatever makes you sleep at night, babe.” He lets the pet name slip, and he did not mean to. It just rolled off his tongue for some reason. Quite easily, too.
You don’t seem to care – or even notice – as you chuckle.
There’s a comfortable silence that hangs in the air again when Jungkook decides to break it.
“Hey, I really appreciate you for coming along. You and the gang, really. This is a really good trip so far.”
You give him a smile as you look at him. It’s one of those pretty ones that are a bit small but there’s a certain shine to your eyes and Jungkook just really loves looking at you with a smile on your face. You’re so pretty, he thinks he’s so lucky to even get the chance to look at you.
“You know we all need this trip, right? I think it’s all our first time vacationing in two years.”
He nods, chuckling to himself. It’s true. The last time was the Thailand trip and it felt like eons ago. Being a resident surgeon means less free time for leisure – and so you always make sure to spend your days off wisely. Even this trip took a lot of pre-planning to be possible just so all of your schedules would match.
“It’s crazy, though…” you say suddenly.
Jungkook cocks a brow at you. “What’s crazy?”
“That we’ve known each other for like – what? Eight years?”
Eight years and four months to be exact. Jungkook’s not keeping count – he just will never forget the exact moment he met you for the very first time.
It’s truly one of his core memories – knowing you. He remembers having to pass by the law library to meet Jimin – one of his closest friends who was studying law at the same grad school as him at the time. They were planning to eat out for lunch, but then he saw a woman at the individual study areas with a reading material that’s familiar with his. Netter’s Atlas of Human Anatomy. You wore that maroon hairclip you loved so much during first year (Jungkook remembers you losing it in the second semester and how he bought you another one in your birthday), and when you looked up from your book for awhile, taking a break from taking notes on your iPad, that was when Jungkook saw your face and he nearly falls over back then.
It’s common knowledge among your mutual friends and acquaintances that you’re pretty. It’s the first thing that Jungkook noticed about you, the reason why he harbored an instant crush. That pretty much turned into… well – something deeper as the years passed by and he got to know you more than just your beautiful physical appearance.
He found it strange at the time to find somebody who was obviously a med student studying at the law library, but he soon found out it was because you didn’t like studying at the med lib, said you felt too much pressure being among your fellow med students. Jungkook understood that in a spiritual level, and so when you became friends, you studied a lot at the law lib, until you met Doyeon and she formed a study group. It wasn’t long before Taehyung joined the equation.
Looking back at it, Jungkook thinks it’s surreal. How knowing you led to him knowing more people that would soon be important in his life up until the age of thirty-one.
“Almost a decade.” He says, can’t help but smile at the thought.
“Right? It feels so surreal sometimes that we all knew each other at, like, twenty-three and twenty two. And now we’re in our thirties.”
“When you put it like that…” Jungkook trails off, laughing at how young you actually were eight years ago.
“Yeah, I know!” You giggle. You look ahead, then you laugh again to yourself. Jungkook looks at you in confusion, giving you a questioning look at your sudden burst of laughter. Looking at him, you shake your head, “This is a bit of a TMI, but I was twenty-two when I entered med school, so I just lost my virginity three years ago. You know what’s funny? I’ve always thought I would lose my virginity, at like, thirty. Or twenty-seven. But that was even way too early for me.”
Jungkook almost splutters at the way you casually bring it up. He takes the bottle of Smirnoff away from him and looks at you with a chuckle. “Losing your virginity at nineteen is common.”
“Well, did you? Lose yours at nineteen?” You arch a brow.
“Nope.” Jungkook shakes his head, tipping his head back to drink again.
“Younger?” You ask again.
Jungkook chuckles at your curiosity. Much to your surprise, he shakes his head again. “Nah. Junior year. I just turned twenty-one. Lost it with my first girlfriend.”
Your lips part and Jungkook meets your shocked stare, brow cocked upwards.
“You’re fucking with me.”
“What? No, I’m not.” He laughs. He gets your surprise, though. Taehyung couldn’t believe it either when it came up in a random conversation.
You still look incredulous as you say, “You mean, like you never dated until junior year of undergrad?”
Jungkook shakes his head once again. “Yes, and no…? I mean, I had a… sort of girlfriend? Back in highschool, yeah, but it was more of like a mutual crush thing rather than an official relationship. But yeah, never dated and never had sex ‘til I found my first girlfriend in third year.”
You look at him suspiciously still, and Jungkook can’t help but laugh even more at your reaction.
“I really don’t believe you.”
“What’s so surprising about that?” Jungkook knows the answer, though. He sleeps around, and you know that. It’s probably why you can’t believe he’s only started having sex until third year of college.
You’re quiet for a bit.
“So… you and that girlfriend broke up, and then…” you trail off, letting him finish the pieces.
Jungkook chuckles, recalling some memories that he thought were already hidden well at the back of his head.
Jiyeon. Her name was Park Jiyeon, his first girlfriend. He was the one who ended things – and not because he didn’t have feelings for her. It was the other way around.
“Yeah,” Jungkook fills in. “Didn’t date seriously after that.”
“Uh… was it a bad break-up?” You say, and there’s hesitance in your voice. When Jungkook looks at you, you open your mouth to take your question back, probably, but Jungkook just gives you a warm smile.
“Yeah. It was bad. But I don’t really think about it now.”
You nod. “I see.” You say, looking ahead at the ocean again. “You dated… quite seriously again in our last year of med school, though.”
“Sora?”
“Yeah.”
Jungkook nods, remembering the only one-year relationship he had. Min Sora was a fashion magazine director at the time. Jungkook liked her as she did, but they had too many differences that lead to too many arguments. Sora ended things before the relationship dragged out. Jungkook was grateful for it. They’re casual as of now… good friends, maybe?
“I always wondered why she broke up with you.” You say quietly.
Jungkook doesn’t expect that. “You wondered about that?”
“Yeah. I mean, you seemed like you were both really into each other, so I just thought… you know,” you shrug.
“Ah. That,” Jungkook looks afar, recalling the day when she ended things with him. It had been because of the stress that the last year of med school brought – he likes to think that. But it was also during the time when Eunwoo proposed to you and what he thought was feelings forgotten for you came back resurfacing and Sora just… figured him out. She told him he loved you, and she’s got no spare time to compete with that. Denying it at the time was futile – Sora was smart. A wise, independent woman. She ended the relationship herself before she got deeply hurt. Jungkook has always felt sorry about how things turned out. No, he doesn’t regret the break-up – just regrets the way he hurt her – unintentionally – even though she didn’t show it.  “Just didn’t work out, I guess.”
You nod again.
Silence sits in the air.
It feels a little strange to talk about these things now. It’s not that you both never share these aspects about your lives to each other, but it’s the first time you ask him about Sora. He never really bothered to share, though, for the record.
From his periphery, he sees you taking your phone out from your pocket, then gasping.
Jungkook immediately looks at you to see what’s wrong. You show him your phone and he notes nothing of significance first before you say, “It’s 12:01 am. It’s September first!”
“Oh.”
“Happy birthday, Kook.” You say, smiling at him, and it’s an underestimation for Jungkook to say he nearly gets blinded by it. You look so gorgeous in your happy smile, so genuine, so warm, so cozy in your big grey hoodie.
Jungkook wants so bad to plant his lips on yours right then and there, but he reminds himself that he can’t do that. He reminds himself that you’re taken. That you like somebody else. The somebody else arriving tomorrow, as per your words earlier this day when he asked about Mingyu.
Still, it doesn’t stop Jungkook from mirroring your smile.
“Thank you.”
“And, before I forget,” you stuff your hands in the pocket of your hoodie and Jungkook watches as you take out a small rectangular box. As he pays you a glance, you’re a little bit shy, not looking straight into his eyes as you say, “Uh. I saw this somewhere, and I thought you’d like it.”
You extend your hand to him and Jungkook lets go of his beer to take the velvety green box from you.
He feels jittery as he takes it in, caresses the ribbon first before opening it altogether.
What’s inside surprises him.
“It didn’t cost much so don’t throw it away,” you say, uncharacteristically defensive. Jungkook can’t see your expression, but he bets your thoughts are going haywire as it takes him awhile to say anything about your gift. You always get nervous when it comes to gifts. “... and anyway, it’s not even my real gift. My real gift is a hairdryer, so I’m sure you’re gonna like that better. But it’s cute, right? You can hang it in your keyholder or something—”
“__,” Jungkook cuts you off, his eyes still on the keyring laying on the box. “You’re giving this to me?”
“Y-yeah. It’s… uh… cute, right? I thought it was cute.” You say, and when Jungkook looks at you, he sees the adorable way your brows furrow.
He chuckles, looking at the keyring again. It’s a silver Claddagh.
“Do you know what this means?” Jungkook asks.
“The what?”
Jungkook points to the Claddagh. “This symbol.”
You look away as you say, “No, not really. I just thought it’s a cool keychain. You told me you like keychains, but I don’t ever see you with a keychain. So.”
With your nostrils flaring a little, he knows you’re lying. You definitely know what the Claddagh symbol means.
But instead of goading you about it, Jungkook takes the keyring out of the box and hangs it over his finger, admiring the item.
“Thank you. This is really cute, and I love it.” Jungkook tells you, giving you a soft smile.
You stare at him and then cave into a smile of your own. “I’m glad you do.”
Jungkook looks at the Claddagh again and smiles heartily.
His heart aches with so much yearning and longing when you go back to the villa that night, spending about three minutes staring at the Claddagh you gifted him that he immediately hangs in his key holder. Jungkook thinks he’s going to transfer it to his work bag or the back of his rearview mirror, but his keyholder would do for now.
You love him alright, certainly not the way he does, but it’s enough for him.
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[ DAY 2 | September 1st, 11:55pm ]
It was not a secret among Nayeon, Doyeon, and Taehyung that Jungkook’s mood considerably plummeted down as soon as Mingyu called you early in the morning that he’d be landing in the afternoon.
Afternoon came, and he tried to suck it up like a grown man – and because as far as you know, they’re both friends. And Mingyu’s your boyfriend. He should be nothing but supportive.
But it was especially hard when you gushed about being excited that he was finally here. It’s been four months since you started seeing each other, two months since you officially dated, but somehow, Jungkook still could not process it.
He knows he’s being unfair. To you and to himself. But he couldn’t help it. He couldn’t help the feeling of ugly bitterness that sat in his heart as you told him about how Mingyu rented another villa so you both could room together, effectively taking you away from the rest of your friends.
Of course, you all spent his birthday together – doing tons of water activities in the ocean, eating at the dining hall, and roaming around for some more leisure time, but Jungkook could not help but think that ever since Mingyu’s arrived, you’ve been sticking with him, even taking the time away from the gang to show your boyfriend around the resort.
Even at the villa’s porch where all of you took out your foldable chairs to drink outside, you were with Mingyu, perched on his lap, laughing at the jokes getting thrown around in the circle.
He tried not to look too much at how Mingyu comfortably wrapped one arm around your waist while the other held a drink, how you leaned into his touch, and how easily he blended with the group with his charm.
“Where’d you get the ice cream?” Doyeon asked as Taehyung sat down on his chair with a small bowl of the sweet treat.
“Fridge. Nayeon and I bought it earlier.”
“There’s ice cream?” Mingyu asked, in which Taehyung nodded to. He turned to you. “Do you want it?”
Jungkook’s brows furrowed in confusion. “__’s lactose intolerant.” He noticed everybody suddenly looking at him. Feeling cornered, he drank from his beer to avoid their gazes.
Mingyu, obviously surprised by the declaration, glanced back at you. “Baby, you didn’t tell me that?”
You winced. “It’s not really a big deal.” you waved him off and when you laugh.
“Yeah, she’s stubborn about it. She can inhale five cones in one sitting.” Taehyung said which made everybody laugh. Jungkook knew it was to lighten the mood. So, he laughed as well, even though from his periphery, he could see you giving him daggers through your eyes.
Jungkook doesn’t know why you had to pretend it wasn’t a big deal. Sure, Taehyung’s right about you not taking your lactose intolerance seriously sometimes, but you’ve also gotten into a lot of trouble because of it, hence why you’ve been making conscious efforts to not eat dairy.
The whole day leaves a sour impression on him with Mingyu around. Quite a shame, really, since he started his birthday so well with you taking him to the far-end of the beach to drink and give him a Claddagh.
When the night becomes much darker, Jungkook sits on the terrace near the pool all by himself. Everybody’s fast asleep at this point. He doesn’t know about you, though, ‘cause you’ve probably transferred all your stuff to the other villa Mingyu rented around.
“Hey,”
Jungkook looks at the embodied voice that suddenly calls. He sees it’s Doyeon.
“Hey,” Jungkook smiles, taking the other bottle of beer on the coffee table and offering it to her.
She waves his hand. “Nah, I’ve had enough for the whole day.” Doyeon situates herself on the folding chair next to Jungkook.
Jungkook nods, looking straight ahead to the pool. They sit in comfortable silence for a while until Doyeon speaks.
“Hey, I’m sorry for the last week,”
Jungkook glances at her with a small smile. “What for?”
“For calling you a pussy. And just… being harsh. Had a tough week and your emotional constipation just pissed me off more. You’re still a pussy, but I shouldn’t have rubbed it off your face.” She says.
Jungkook stares at her with parted lips.
“Wow. I don’t know if that’s an actual apology.”
“It’s an apology with a hundred percent realness, you know I don’t baby anybody.”
“Hah,” Jungkook scoffs, amused. “Yeah. Well, you’re right, though. Today’s been…”
Doyeon sighs. “It’s hard on you, right?”
Jungkook can only give her a meaningful smile.
“But you don’t exactly have the right to get jealous… she’s not your girlfriend and you two are not anything,” Doyeon says, and it tugs at Jungkook’s heartstrings. Meanwhile, she looks ahead and continues to speak. “It’s hard when you have all these feelings for someone, but you have to hide it. You just want to show everybody they mean so much to you, but you can’t. It sucks.”
Jungkook thinks she’s still talking about his situation with you but then as he glances at her, she seems to be deep in thought. As if she’s actually speaking from her own experience.
He’s intrigued by that, of course.
“Woah, are you still talking about me?”
That seems to get Doyeon out of her trance.
She rolls his eyes. “Who else would I be talking about?”
Jungkook opens his mouth to say something. You guys have always had the theory that Doyeon has a secret boyfriend. It’s silly at best but sometimes, he thinks it’s true. Doyeon has never been the type to wear her heart on her sleeve, though. She’s tough and she’s frank a lot of times. But she’s the kind of friend who’d call you a bitch in your face but then would go to all the lengths to defend you from everybody.
“Okay.” Jungkook nods, dropping the subject.
“Has she told you yet?” Doyeon asks suddenly.
“What?” He mirrors back, knowing exactly who the she Doyeon’s referring to.
“She’s planning to move in with him some of these days.”
“I…” Jungkook stops, his mouth opening and closing like a fish in water. To say that he’s stunned is an understatement. Obviously, you haven’t told him anything.
“You don’t know.” Doyeon says upon realization.
Jungkook shakes his head. “She didn’t tell me.”
Doyeon lets out a loud sigh. “It’s not really set in stone, though, that’s what she said. But they’re discussing it.”
“Ah.” Jungkook nods and looks ahead at the pool. Another beat of silence, a sip of beer, and then he scoffs. “I really should’ve confessed even way back then, huh?” He laughs but there’s no humor in it.
Doyeon stares at him. “I didn’t tell you about that so you can regret not telling your feelings for her earlier.”
“I didn’t—”
“I told you that so you can move on, Jungkook.”
Jungkook closes his mouth shut.
She looks away. “You remember the time I liked you in med school?”
“Doyeon…” Jungkook’s lips part, not at all expecting for her to bring that up. It’s been so long ago and ever since… Doyeon’s confession, they never really talked about it again.
“Oh my god, look at your face,” She laughs. “God, do you think I still like you? I moved on the day after you rejected me.”
“I didn’t reject you.” Jungkook defensively says.
She rolls her eyes. “I asked you if you were interested and you didn’t say anything. You just looked at me like this,” Doyeon stiffens her body and widens her eyes in a comical rendition of Jungkook’s famous OJO face.
Jungkook can’t help but scoff. “That was the strangest confession that happened to me, though. You told me you liked me in the straightest face ever, I still think it was a cruel prank of some sort.”
Doyeon bursts into laughter, and Jungkook follows along, recalling that time.
“Yeah… that was funny. But… it was real, not a prank at all. I don’t remember why I liked you, though.”
Jungkook looks at her incredulously. “Okay, but that’s actually the most hurtful thing you’ve ever said to me.”
“Don’t take it personally,” Doyeon rolls her eyes, but there’s a smile on her lips still. “Anyway, I brought it up because that was the same day when I realized you like __. I mean, I had my suspicions, but I confirmed it around the time.”
Jungkook shakes his head. “Was really surprised when you told me that. I thought I hid it pretty well.”
“Yeah, but not to me. You know, I don’t even know how __ didn’t figure it out herself. You’d always follow her around and in our study sessions, you always stayed up late with her and was overly attentive. Whenever Taehyung asked you too much, you sort of like reached a point where you just told him to suck it up. But if it was __, you were so patient,” Doyeon giggles. “She had a really hard time with Biochem. I remember you tutoring her all the time.”
“That was…” Jungkook bows his head down, a bit embarrassed at being read like that. “She cried a lot during first year.”
Doyeon purses her lips. “Yeah…”
Both stare ahead again, with nothing to say for a few more seconds. Jungkook continues to sip his bear while Doyeon quietly sits.
“I have this biased notion about Mingyu,” Doyeon speaks up. Jungkook looks at her she continues, “I keep on telling myself, he’s probably gonna fuck up anytime soon – and that’s because deep inside, I still want you and __ together. You know I’ve always wanted you both to be together. It’s hard to see __ struggling with her love life. She almost failed the internship when Eunwoo broke up with her, and I don’t want her to go through that again as her friend. It’s hard, because I can’t do anything about it. I think of you, and how much you love her, and I think you’re good for her… but at the same time, I feel bad for thinking that. Because I can see that Mingyu makes her happy. It’s different with the other guys she dated before him. She’s truly happy with him, and I find it hard to think that Mingyu’s gonna break her heart. He seems… nice… and that he’d be good for her, you know what I mean?”
Jungkook’s quiet, processing her words.
Doyeon sighs before she speaks again. “But that hurts you in the process, doesn’t it? Seeing her happy but not with you. You’re both my friends and I’m in the position where it’s hard for me to situate myself in a certain place. Because I want __ to be happy, but I also want you to be happy – but your happiness is interconnected and it’s… tricky. It’s a tricky situation.”
Jungkook doesn’t realize that he’s gripping the neck of the bottle quite tightly at Doyeon’s words, but he listens.
“I don’t normally say things like this, Jungkook, but I’m your friend so I’m just gonna let this go,” Doyeon finally looks at him, and he meets her gaze. “It hurts me to see you hurting like this. It hurts Taehyung and Nayeon as well, but they won’t say it. Just… just be… just be okay, please?”
Jungkook exhales a sharp, shaky breath.
He knows what Doyeon meant by that. She’s asking him to… find happiness on his own. Happiness that doesn’t lie on __’s reciprocity because with the way things are going, that’s impossible. She’s planning to move in with Mingyu, and most of all, she seems genuinely happy.
“I… I know. Thank you.” Jungkook says, not really knowing what to say.
Doyeon chuckles. “Do you want a hug?”
He looks at her with a smile. “I could use one right now, yeah.”
Doyeon laughs before standing up and going over to where Jungkook sits on his own sun chair. When she steps in front of him, Jungkook wraps his arms around her waist and lets himself rest the side of his head on her stomach, closing his eyes when Doyeon pats the crown of his head.
“Belated happy birthday, Jungkook.”
Jungkook chuckles. “Thanks. You’re unusually mushy today.”
Doyeon pinches his ear slightly which earns her a groan.
The two stay like that for a few more seconds when suddenly, Jungkook hears a familiar voice.
“Oh, h-hey guys,”
Jungkook immediately looks ahead to see you standing from the other side of the terrace, looking at him and Doyeon. At that, Doyeon lets go of him, twisting her body to look in your direction. Jungkook retreats his arms back to his side and smiles to acknowledge you.
“I thought you were sleeping already.” He says.
“Yeah, what brought you here?” Doyeon asks.
You approach them with unusually slow steps, as if reluctant. “Left my wallet here. Just realized it a while ago,” you say. After that, you stop on your tracks. Your gaze falls between them with an unsure smile on your face. “You two drinking?”
“Nah, Jungkook is.” Doyeon says, pointing to the bottle of Smirnoffs on the small table beside Jungkook’s chair. Then, she looks under her own. “Where’d you leave your wallet?”
“Over my chair earlier.” You give her a smile again. But somehow, it looks a bit awkward. A little forced. Jungkook knows you well enough to identify your smiles.
And as he looks at you longer, he realizes you have a certain color on your face, but it’s one of those expressions he can’t read.
“Well,” you blurt out after a beat of silence. Looking around, you go over to where you were sitting earlier then duck. “I think I left it here…” you trail off. Jungkook’s just about to stand up to help as well when you suddenly pull up a brown leather, grinning at both of them. “Yay.”
Jungkook chuckles. “That would’ve been the third wallet you’ll lose this year.”
You mirror his laughter, and Doyeon joins in.
There’s another pause and then hesitantly, you ask, “Did I… uh… disturb something? Or…”
“What?” Doyeon asks with furrowed brows. “No,”
“Ah, okay,” you smile at her and then insert your wallet in your shorts. “Anyway, I’m heading back to Mingyu. The villa he rented is just at the back of ours, so… feel free to visit anytime or whatever.”
“Sure.” Jungkook says. He didn’t mean it to sound clipped and short but he must have unintentionally let the tone slip, as you and Doyeon immediately give him a look. He clears his throat. “I mean, of course. Tomorrow?”
You nod.
You look at him. And then, you point between him and Nayeon. “Are you two staying up here late?”
“Nah, I’m heading to bed actually.” Doyeon says, picking up her phone from the sun lounger.
“Yeah, me too.” Jungkook puts the beer to the coffee table and stands up.
You nod. “Okay, then. Well, good night to you two.”
“Alright, good night. I’ll head out first.” Doyeon says before disappearing into the sliding door that leads straight to the villa’s living room.
You soon turn your heels back to head out as well, but Jungkook calls after you. Turning around, you hum, acknowledging him. “Hm?”
“Good night, stinky.”
You deadpan. “Night, fucker.”
Jungkook laughs, watching your retreating back as you leave.
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[ DAY 4 | September 3rd , 3:05 am ]
Jungkook likes to work out when he has a lot in his mind. But sometimes, he opts for jogging or walking around to clear his head.
With the turn of events since Mingyu’s arrival and Doyeon informing him about your plans on furthering your relationship with Mingyu, he finds himself along by the shore at three am with high hopes to clear his mind. It doesn’t give the solution, but it temporarily does the job.
Inserting his hands in the pockets of his hoodie, he looks ahead at the view of the ocean, trying so hard to shut his head down with overbearing thoughts of you. It’s no use, though, it’s always filled with thoughts of you and you alone.
Jungkook thinks about the time in med school when he thought he was completely over you. It had been after you made it official with Eunwoo two months into seeing him. He thought it would be a “bigger person” thing to do, moving on, that is, after you announced that you got a boyfriend – but then later on, when he slept with other women or had his casual dates, you suddenly popped up in his head randomly, and his heart suddenly ached when Eunwoo would drop by the university to fetch you. He felt ugly bitterness when you smiled too much whenever Eunwoo was brought up in the conversation. He found himself wishing it was him instead – the guy you thought of buying shirts for, the guy you randomly thought of when you saw something at the mall or the park, or the guy you called when you needed anything.
It was that winter break in freshman year when he realized that he loved you, after trying hard to brush his feelings off for you as a mere infatuation because you were gorgeous and smart.
He finds himself thinking about the time when he almost let out his heart when you had a fall-out with Eunwoo during your third year. Thinks about how pathetic he was for thinking that he finally had the chance. It had been when you called him at midnight, crying onto the phone as you asked him if he wasn’t busy. Jungkook had been studying for a Clinical Skill Assessment at that time, but he’d have been a fool to make you feel lonely when you already seemed like you were not fine. So, he had set aside his studying that night and went right over to your place. You told him about how Eunwoo was going cold, how Eunwoo was getting too close to the senior architect at his firm which you’d been having huge arguments about during those days – Jungkook remembered feeling broken at the sight of you crying, could feel himself building up hatred for the guy who was fucking up his chance with the woman he did not deserve. He thought about how he would never do that to you, thought about how he could be better for you – the envy bubbling inside his heart too big to ignore.
Jungkook remembered thinking how he would never fuck up any chances with you, and how Eunwoo was a fucking idiot for even making you feel that way.
That night, he almost kissed you. And the day after that, you avoided him like the plague.
Doyeon told him he was just as much of a big fucking idiot as Eunwoo for doing that. And Jungkook remembered regretting that night, and swearing off to never, ever make a move on you ever again because your avoidance of him made him feel like the biggest fucking piece of shit to ever exist on Earth.
He remembers you didn’t talk to him for about a month. And he remembers fearing that that was finally it.  
Of course, you made up – you’re still in his life. You let him still be in your life even though he betrayed your trust. The trust that lies on the fact that he was your best friend. Someone who was not supposed to take advantage of your vulnerability, someone who did not suddenly try to kiss you when you were at your worst.
It was a memory you two weren’t fond of. Heck, you’ve never ever brought it up not even once since it happened. When you finally talked to him again after that, you did not let him apologize for what he did – just shut him down by saying that you two should just forget about it and never mention it again. You made it clear that you did not want to talk about it – not at all, not in a million years.
Again, Jungkook has had a million attempts to move on. Especially when you got back together with Eunwoo. He did temporarily, when Sora came into the picture. He genuinely did like her, even more than his first girlfriend in college, and he thought he could eventually love her the same way he does you, but Eunwoo suddenly proposed… and his defense came crumbling down. The fear of losing you once again was too overwhelming that he ruined the relationship with Sora because admittedly, he had always been pathetic like that.
Even now that you’re with Mingyu, he’s still pathetic. He still thinks that one day, you can finally look at him. Like, really look at him and feel anything but friendly towards him. It’s extremely pathetic that he keeps on telling himself that your friendship will be enough, but then deep down, it’s not.
Jungkook shuts his eyes close when he feels the cool breeze of the wind hitting his skin under the hoodie. He lets himself stand there for a while, just trying to bask in the surroundings, ignoring the heavy feeling that sits in his heart.
But then he smells a sudden waft of smoke, and he knits his brows as he opens his eyes back again, turning to the direction of the smell.
When he turns back, he sees a familiar figure of a man.
“Mingyu?”
Mingyu glances back at him with the same surprised look on his face, but it disappears just as quickly. Pinching the cigarette between his fingers, he blows smoke in the air and inserts one hand in his shorts.
“Jeon.”
“Still Jeon to you, huh?” Jungkook sneers, walking over to where Mingyu is. “Why are you here?”
Mingyu arches a brow. “I could ask you the same thing.”
“Woke up a few minutes ago and couldn’t get back to sleep.”
Taking a hit of his cigarette again, Mingyu shakes his head. “That’s tough.”
“Same with you?” Jungkook asks.
“Nah. Had a discussion with my girlfriend. Just wanted to clear my head.”
Jungkook nods, not saying anything to that. It’s weird that you’ve been fighting a lot lately. He wonders if you’re okay.
Pulling out a pack of Marlboro and a lighter, Mingyu extends them to Jungkook.
He looks down at it and thinks about how this exact thing happened in college. Mingyu always had the pack of cigarettes and the link to the best weed man in college. He used to think they would be fond memories.
But Jungkook shakes his head, looking ahead.
“I quit years ago.” He says. And it is true. He wasn’t much of a smoker and only did it occasionally when he was extremely stressed, but it took him awhile to stop the habit completely, only dropping the cigarettes during second year of med school. Jungkook would say it was due to his own concern about his health – but there was an incident in the same year where you caught him smoking at the uni’s park after a particularly taxing exam, and how you did not hesitate to tell him that you hated – absolutely abhorred – smokers. You said you didn’t care if he smoked, but as a med student he should’ve known better.
He never touched that shit again.
“Changing your ways now?” Mingyu says with a teasing – more like mocking – tone, inserting the pack and lighter back in his pants.
Jungkook shrugs at that, which earns him a scoff from Mingyu.
“Do you smoke around her?” Jungkook suddenly asks.
“Who?”
“__.”
A beat of silence. And then Mingyu laughs.
“No. She doesn’t know I smoke. She doesn’t have to.”
Good. Jungkook thinks. Good that he doesn’t smoke around her. But what did he mean by saying she doesn’t need to know?
“She doesn’t like smokers, you know.” Jungkook tells him.
From his periphery, Jungkook sees Mingyu glancing at him. It takes a while for him to say something.
“You’d know that, huh?”
The dip in his tone makes Jungkook meet his gaze. Suddenly, the smirk on Mingyu’s face is gone, and there’s something behind his eyes that he can’t quite put a finger on.
Jungkook tries to ignore that. “I’ve known her for a long time. The others can also tell you that.” He says, referring to the rest of your friends on the trip.
“You think I don’t know?”
With furrowed brows and growing confusion, Jungkook stares at Mingyu.
“What?”
“That you like my girlfriend.” Mingyu spits the words out like venom in his mouth, but it’s in a way that tells him it’s been sitting with him for far too long. Jungkook’s surprised at the declaration, feels himself being taken aback by the blunt way he said it as if he’s so sure.
But Jungkook doubles down, to Mingyu’s surprise.
“So?”
That obviously wasn’t the answer the other man wanted to hear. So, what? He can dish it, but he can’t take it?
“You’re goddamn pathetic, then.” Mingyu says after awhile, taking a hit on his cigarette again.
It itches the bubbling anger Jungkook has had for him for the past ten years.
“I like __, and I’m not gonna deny that to you,” Jungkook faces him. “But you don’t have to worry about that, because unlike you, I have enough self-respect to not sleep with my friend’s girlfriend.”
It’s another response that Mingyu does not expect. Jungkook also did not mean to let that out. But his tongue glided with the words and he couldn’t help it. Suddenly, memories of junior year in undergrad comes back flashing to him; Jiyeon and Mingyu, fucking in his goddamn bed, his girlfriend cheating on him with his best friend.
Jungkook’s already moved on from that. Jiyeon was not a loss, even though she was his first girlfriend – heck, first love even, but she cheated on him. And not just with anybody but his best friend at the time. The worst thing was that Mingyu was completely in on it, and Jungkook doesn’t think he ever felt remorse about what happened back then. Mingyu gave him a half-assed apology the day he walked in on them, even had the gall to “explain” Jiyeon’s side, that apparently, she just wasn’t “feeling it” with Jungkook anymore, and that Mingyu and her had been hitting it off. Jungkook realized it was why Mingyu suddenly came over way too often over at his apartment.
It’s exactly why he never bothered to meet with Mingyu after graduation. Why he was not enthusiastic meeting him at the engagement party.
But that happened so many years ago that he thought Mingyu’s changed. He didn’t want to burst your bubble and tell you what happened between them back then because he’d be the one to ruin the happiness you’ve wished for all these years.
“I see you’re still hung up on that.” Mingyu says after a while. He throws the cigarette away and steps on it with his heel.
Jungkook’s jaw ticks in what he feels is growing rage. “I’ve moved on. I’m just letting you know that even though I like __, I’m never doing what you did back then.”
“You’re such good guy, then?”
“If not cheating makes me a good guy, then maybe I am.” Jungkook shrugs.
“Jiyeon was a bitch. She was never gonna be good for you.” Mingyu suddenly says.
It makes Jungkook seethe. “And so you fucked her?”
“She liked me better than you. Women always liked me more, that’s why I was going through them while your goody-two shoes virgin prude ass was daydreaming about dating to marry.  You remember that, right?” Mingyu looks at him with a mocking stare. “And Jiyeon was smoking hot. She offered, I just delivered. Said you couldn’t make her cum properly. We could have shared her, you know?”
“Fuck you.” Jungkook spits out. He feels enraged and pissed and disgusted all at the same time.
“Are you getting mad?” Mingyu levels him with an infuriating smirk. “You always got a stick up in your ass, Jeon. Kyungmi told me you’re just a regular playboy these days, said it was the effect of your first girlfriend cheating on you. Right now, though, is that just a front to hide your feelings from my girlfriend? A pathetic boy best friend just wanting to be noticed by his hot girl best friend? You play that role so well. Telling me she’s lactose intolerant, she doesn’t like smokers… you want to fuck her so bad it’s laughable because you know you can’t.”
“Don’t… fucking talk about her like that.” Jungkook growls, and he feels blood rushing through his veins.
Mingyu shakes his head. “You know what I thought when I first met her? I was completely interested right away, but when you showed up…” He chuckles in the way that makes Jungkook’s skin prickle. “It just made me want her more.”
“You’re fucked in the head.”
“This fucked in the head guy got the girl you want wanting to commit to him. I don’t know if she told you, but we’re moving in together.”
Jungkook pokes his tongue to his cheek. “You think I won’t tell her about this?”
“You think she’s gonna believe you?” Mingyu fires back. Jungkook closes his mouth, doesn’t really know if he’s confident enough to say yes. That earns him an arrogant smirk from Mingyu. “That’s right, she won’t. I have no doubt she’s gonna choose me over you. Jiyeon has had before. And if you’re gonna fight the same battle again this time, you’ll lose.”
Jungkook regulates his breathing hearing his words. He’s starting to not see clearly, his fist clenching on his side and he knows better than to resort to violence, but Mingyu’s testing his patience.
He’s completely wrong for thinking that he isn’t the same asshole he was back in college. He’s completely wrong for not telling you about him sooner. He’s completely wrong about everything.
Glancing at his hand, Mingyu looks him in the eyes, leaning forward. “You wanna hit me just like how you did back then? You almost fucking killed me when you gave me that head injury that kicked me out of the fucking team.”
The head injury. That fucking head injury. Jungkook was so mad when he found out that he just saw pure red. It wasn’t his best moment – he knows. He lost control and just… went for it. He still regrets doing it – not punching Mingyu – but for losing it when he could’ve shown him that he’d always be the bigger person between them both.
He’s quiet and Mingyu takes that as a win. Scoffing, Mingyu says, “I could’ve reported you to the admin and you could’ve been expelled, and if that happened, you couldn’t have gone to med. You are where you are right now because of me, so don’t fucking show that animosity towards me because you fucking owe me one.”
Jungkook can’t help but laugh. But he does so humorlessly. “You really think that?” He stares at the other guy. “You’re just as delusional as you were back then, Gyu. You think everybody liked you – but that was just because you were a touch-deprived loser who would fuck anything that breathed near him, and I wasn’t. I only entertained women I liked. You thought you were smarter, but I was always the one who got the better and higher grades, even though you studied way harder. Is that why you went with law? So you won’t have to compete with me in the med field? I also know you were pissed as fuck when the captain title was passed on to me instead of you,” Jungkook leans closer as well. “You’ve always thought of yourself so highly, but deep down, you were just an insecure little boy trying to compete with another guy that didn’t even see you as competition because you were that irrelevant.”
Mingyu, in his own fir of rage, grabs Jungkook’s collar, but Jungkook stays in his place, face stoic as Mingyu snarls, “You keep running your mouth while you cry yourself to sleep because those don’t mean anything when I’m the one fucking the love of your life,” Jungkook visibly recoils to that, and when Mingyu notices, he smirks, adding, “Yeah, yeah, you wanna know how __ is in bed? Because you’ll never see her sopping wet when you give her cock. That angelic face of hers… you’ll never know she’s a slut the way that filthy mouth asks me to fuck her harder because I am that goo—”
He wasn’t able to finish his sentence when Jungkook’s heavy fist suddenly lands on his cheek.
That effectively gets Mingyu to let go of Jungkook’s collar as he loses his balance and steps backwards limply, thumbing the side of his mouth only to see blood.
Whisking away his fist, Jungkook looks at Mingyu with fire in his eyes and venom in his voice when he says, “Don’t you ever fucking dare talk about her like that, you fucking piece of shit.”
The moon hangs low in the sky, casting a silvery white glow over the beach, but the comforting sound of waves and the calm of the surrounding is a contrast to the rising tension between Jungkook and Mingyu.
When Mingyu doesn’t say anything, Jungkook turns on his heel, ready to leave, but suddenly, he feels the back of his shirt getting pulled and being met with a fist right on his cheek, close to his nose. He barely dodges the hit, taken aback by the unexpected attack.
“Fuck you.” Mingyu grits, eyes blazing.
With that, the fight intensifies, with Jungkook throwing a quick jab back. Mingyu retaliates with as much fury, the two of them grappling, their bodies colliding with violent force. Soon, the sound of their grunts and the occasional crash of a punch against flesh is drowned out by the crashing waves.
And then a familiar voice calls their names.
“Jungkook! Mingyu!”
“Oh my god!”
Jungkook’s suddenly being taken away by somebody by his arms, and he realizes it’s Taehyung when he speaks up again once he and Mingyu are off each other.
“What the fuck are you two doing?” Taehyung asks incredulously, rightfully shocked at what he’s seen. Jungkook forces his way out of Taehyung’s hold in frustration, wiping the side of his mouth. Mingyu’s on the other side a few inches away being hesitantly held down by Nayeon, who looks at all of them with deep worry in her eyes. Turning to her, Taehyung says, “Call Doyeon and __. They’re sleeping in the same room together at the villa.”
“You don’t need to do that,” Jungkook says, glaring at Taehyung.
He looks at him angrily. “You’re fistfighting with somebody at fuck o’clock in the morning. We’re going to get run off by the police, be thankful we saw you.”
“I-I’ll call Doyeon and __.” Nayeon stutters, reluctantly pulling away from Mingyu and going to the direction of the villas.
When she leaves, Taehyung looks between the two beaten up men, not believing their busted faces. Rubbing his own with his hands in frustration, he looks back at them again, saying, “What the fuck happened to you guys? Why were you fighting?”
“It’s none of your business.” Mingyu says.
Taehyung glances at him with irritation. “None of my business? Fuck off, Kim Mingyu. You joined in on this trip. Everything that happens here is quite literally each other’s business.”
“Tae.”
“I can’t believe you guys,” Taehyung shakes his head, ignoring Jungkook. “Fighting like goddamn immature teenagers… are you not embarrassed?”
Looking away, Jungkook decides to sit on the sand and let Taehyung’s words go from one ear to another. His energy is waning and the rage he had a while ago is just simmering down to… nothing. He feels absolutely empty.
“Jungkook?” He doesn’t realize the steps that were coming towards them were you and Doyeon. It’s obvious that you’ve both been sleeping, still in your pajamas as you rush towards their direction. He looks at you when you call his name, but then suddenly, you turn to Mingyu. “Ming— what happened?”
Jungkook feels his heart break when you come towards Mingyu’s direction first. He knows why you did. He’s your boyfriend, of course you are going to tend to him first.
Suddenly, he remembers what Mingyu said. About you choosing him over Jungkook.
Jungkook didn’t doubt that, but it doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt a little to see it fully realized.
“Jungkook– Jesus Christ,” Doyeon comes over to him and quickly checks his head. With knitted brows, she casts him a look.
“I’m fine.”
She’s about to say something, but then she closes her mouth and then glances at you.
Sighing, she turns to everyone and announces, “Look, let’s just get them back to the villa. Treat their wounds before they get infected.”
“Right.” Taehyung says and then comes over to Jungkook to help Doyeon guide him in walking. He relents first because he doesn’t need their assistance, but Taehyung looks at him and he knows he’s pissed. So, he lets them.
As he tries to subtly look over to where you were, you have your arm around Mingyu’s waist while Nayeon helps guide him as well.
It takes a tedious few minutes to get back to the villa where Doyeon and Taehyung decide to take care of him in his room while Nayeon and you tend to Mingyu back in your room.
Doyeon nor Taehyung doesn’t say anything the whole time. Just let the silence fall in the room as they clean his wounds and put bandages around the cuts on his face and treat his busted lip.
He knows they’ll talk to him in the next few hours. It’s inevitable. But at least they’re sparing him for tonight – or today, since it’s almost four am.
Jungkook regrets not seeing the sunrise.
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this chapter is not over yet! tumblr has a 1k paragraph/block limit in a single post and so i can't put the whole thing in this. please look thru the reblogs to read the last scene and the continuation of this chapter!
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hiitsm · 1 month
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Whispers of Desires
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You and your girlfriend are navigating the tender stages of experiencing your first time together.
Whispers of Desires is for 18+ only.
This piece contains intimate conversations about sex, characterized by a mix of awkward, shy, and loving moments. It also includes a depiction of soft, slow, and tender sexual activity, with a focus on emotional connection and mutual care.
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Note: I’ve spent a lot of time crafting this piece, and while it may be a bit longer than initially planned, I felt that each moment deserved the detail it received. I've adjusted it a little. I hope it meets everyone’s expectations. Thank you so much for the kind messages and support after the teaser. I appreciate it a lot.
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The kitchen is warm with the scent of freshly baked pastries, the lingering aroma of sugar and butter mixing with the comforting familiarity of Alexia’s home. You stand at the counter, carefully folding a dishcloth, trying to keep your thoughts focused on the simple, repetitive tasks. The to-do list lies nearby, a silent reminder of the things you can control, and the one thing you can't seem to face.
You glance at the list, its contents scribbled in your neat handwriting:
To-Do List: 1. Clean up the kitchen 2. Fold laundry 3. Talk to Alexia about her sexual desires
Your eyes linger on the third item, the one you've been dreading. With a sigh, you quickly strike through it, the pen's ink cutting across the words as if that could erase the anxiety gnawing at you. You can’t bring yourself to talk to her about that, not yet. What if the rumors are true? What if her desires are something you can't fulfill? You don’t want to lose her, but you also don’t want to lose yourself in the process.
You’ve heard all the rumors about Alexia Putellas. That she loves to dominate, to pull her partners apart with a fierce intensity. That she revels in control, in the thrill of the chase. That her passion is raw and fast. Each whisper you caught only fueled your anxiety, a churning storm of nerves that seemed impossible to quiet. You tried to ignore them, to push the thoughts aside, but they lingered in the back of your mind, casting shadows over the love you share.
And now, with the possibility of taking the next step in your relationship looming before you, the fear has only grown. You’re scared to take that step, terrified that your desires aren’t the same as hers. What if you can’t match her intensity? What if what she wants is something you can’t give? The thought of not being enough for her, of failing her in some way, sends a cold shiver down your spine.
You start wiping down the counters, moving in a methodical rhythm, each swipe of the cloth offering a brief distraction from the storm brewing in your mind. The sponge glides over the cool surface, removing traces of flour and sugar, but the tension in your chest remains.
As you straighten up the scattered baking supplies, your eyes drift toward the small, framed photo on the windowsill. It's a candid shot taken on a sunny day, the two of you caught mid-laughter, arms wrapped around each other, the kind of joy that feels almost too good to be true. The memory makes you pause, your fingers brushing the frame lightly as you wonder if you’re letting your fears overshadow the truth of what you have.
The whispers, the rumors, they all seem so distant when you think about the woman you know. The Alexia who smiles softly at you over breakfast, who texts you in the middle of the day just to say she misses you, who holds your hand like it's the most natural thing in the world. But still, the doubts linger, making you question whether you truly know her as well as you think.
The front door clicks open, and you hear the familiar sound of her footsteps, steady and sure, as they approach the kitchen. You barely have time to turn before she’s there, her presence filling the room with an effortless grace.
“Hola, amor,” she greets you, her voice soft and filled with warmth that wraps around you like a blanket. She glances around the kitchen, taking in the clean counters and organized space. “Cómo va todo?”
You quickly grab the to-do list, folding it in half and slipping it into your pocket before she can see the items you’ve been obsessing over. “Everything’s good,” you reply, hoping your voice sounds more steady than you feel. But Alexia is already closer, her eyes searching yours with a mixture of affection and curiosity.
Before she can ask anything more, you close the distance between you, leaning in to kiss her softly. Her lips are warm, and for a moment, the world outside fades away, leaving just the two of you in this quiet, shared moment. She hums contentedly against your lips, a small, pleased sound that makes your heart flutter.
“Mmm, that was nice,” she murmurs when you pull back, a playful grin tugging at the corners of her mouth. She switches to English, her accent making the words sound even sweeter. She wraps her arms around you, pulling you closer into the safety of her embrace. “What were you up to, amor?”
“Just trying to get things sorted around here,” you say, your voice quieter now, more intimate. “How was your day?”
“Busy, but good,” she replies, her voice a little softer now, as if the closeness between you demands a gentler tone. “I missed you, though.” The sincerity in her voice makes your chest tighten with emotion.
“I missed you too,” you admit, your hand resting on her arm, tracing small patterns on the sleeve of her shirt. You can feel the steady beat of her heart through the fabric, and it gives you a small sense of calm. “I’ve been thinking about you all day.”
Alexia’s eyes soften as she leans in for another kiss, this one more urgent, more filled with the longing that has been building up in both of you throughout the day. Her lips move against yours with a tenderness that quickly deepens into something more, a hunger that you feel echoing in your own chest.
Your heart races as you return her kiss, your fingers threading through her hair, holding onto her as if she’s the only solid thing in your world. For a moment, you lose yourself in the warmth of her touch, in the way she makes you feel safe and cherished.
But as the kiss grows more intense, a wave of anxiety crashes over you, pulling you back to the surface. You break the kiss abruptly, your breath coming in short, uneven gasps. Alexia pulls back just enough to look at you, concern etched on her features.
“Qué pasa?” she asks softly, her hand coming up to cup your cheek, her thumb brushing against your skin in a soothing gesture. Her eyes search yours, trying to understand what’s going on inside your head.
You struggle to find the words, torn between the love you feel for her and the fear that’s been gnawing at you for days. You want to be honest with her, to share what’s been weighing on your heart, but the words stick in your throat, refusing to come out. You’re scared, scared that your desires don’t match hers, scared that what she wants is something you’re not sure you can give. And more than anything, you’re scared of losing her, of the possibility that this might be something that could drive a wedge between you.
Alexia waits patiently, her gaze steady and filled with a quiet strength that both comforts and intimidates you. She deserves the truth, but you’re not sure you’re ready to face it yourself. Not yet.
Alexia's concerned gaze remains locked on you as you struggle to find the right words. Your chest tightens with the weight of your fears, and you can feel your face flush with a mixture of embarrassment and anxiety. The warmth of her hand on your cheek feels comforting, yet it only amplifies your nervousness. You take a deep breath, trying to steady your racing heart.
“I—” you start, your voice trembling slightly. “I’ve been... thinking a lot about us, and, um, there’s something I need to talk to you about.” You stumble over the words, each one feeling like a hurdle you’re barely able to jump. You clear your throat, trying to regain some semblance of composure. “I mean, I know we’ve been... close and everything, and I love you so much, but... but I’ve heard some things, and I—”
You stop abruptly, your hands gesturing awkwardly as if trying to physically grasp the right words. The shame of not being able to articulate your feelings is almost overwhelming. You glance around, desperately searching for something to focus on.
Alexia, sensing your distress, gently guides you towards the couch. “Come on, amor,” she says softly, her voice soothing. “Let’s sit down. You look like you could use a minute.” She leads you to the couch and gestures for you to sit, her touch light but reassuring.
You sink onto the couch, feeling a mixture of relief and dread. Alexia moves to the kitchen, her movements quick but purposeful. She returns with two glasses of water, handing one to you. “Here, drink this. It might help you feel a bit better.”
You take the glass, your hands still trembling slightly as you sip the cool water. Alexia sits beside you, her proximity comforting, yet her eyes are filled with an inquisitive tenderness. She reaches out and takes your free hand in hers, squeezing it gently.
“Whatever it is, we can talk about it,” she says softly. “I’m here for you.”
Feeling the pressure of your emotions building, you fumble for the to-do list you’d tucked away in your pocket. With a sheepish glance at Alexia, you pull it out and hand it to her. Her eyes widen slightly as she looks down at the list, and you see a faint blush spread across her cheeks.
“I, um, I had this list,” you admit, your voice barely above a whisper. “It was supposed to help me keep track of things... but I couldn’t bring myself to talk about... that last item.” You gesture vaguely at the paper, your cheeks burning with embarrassment.
Alexia’s eyes dart to the list, and she blushes lightly as she reads the crossed-out line. The color in her cheeks deepens, and she bites her lip, clearly feeling a bit awkward about the whole situation. “Oh, um...” she stammers, her cheeks growing warm. “I see you’ve, uh, crossed out that part.”
You can’t help but feel a pang of guilt as you watch her reaction. The sight of her blushing and stumbling over her words makes your heart ache. “I’m sorry,” you say quietly, feeling the weight of the situation pressing down on you. “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. I just… I’ve been hearing these things, and I didn’t know if we were on the same page.”
Alexia’s eyes soften with understanding, even though she’s clearly flustered. She reaches out, gently squeezing your hand in a gesture of reassurance. “I’m sorry if I’ve given you the wrong impression,” she says, her voice a little shaky but kind. “I really didn’t mean to cause any worry. I guess I didn’t realize how much those rumors were affecting you.”
You nod, feeling a lump form in your throat. “Yeah, they’ve been on my mind a lot,” you admit. “I’m just scared that my own desires might not match up with what you want. I’ve always preferred things to be a bit softer, you know?”
Alexia’s blush deepens, but she quickly shakes off her shyness, her eyes meeting yours with a sincere intensity. “I understand,” she says softly. “And I want to make sure you feel comfortable with us exploring this together.” She pauses, then adds, her voice growing more confident but still tinged with a hint of awkwardness, “I, um, like to be in control and, well, sometimes a bit rough. But that doesn’t mean we can’t adjust things to fit what we both want.”
You feel a wave of relief wash over you at her honesty. “Thank you for sharing that,” you say, your voice tinged with gratitude. “I really appreciate you being open with me. Can I ask you something? What do you like, exactly?”
Alexia takes a deep breath, her shyness melting away as she becomes more animated. “I, um, really enjoy taking the lead, feeling like I’m in charge,” she says, her eyes brightening with a newfound confidence. “But I also love hearing what you like, what makes you feel good. I want to make sure we both have what we need.”
Her willingness to adapt and consider your feelings makes you feel incredibly valued. You squeeze her hand back, your heart swelling with appreciation. “I like it when things are gentle and tender,” you admit, feeling more at ease now that the conversation is flowing openly. “It’s important to me that we both feel good about what we’re doing.”
After the conversation, the dynamic between you and Alexia shifts subtly but significantly. There’s a new warmth in her gaze, an added layer of intimacy that wasn’t there before. The initial awkwardness has melted away, replaced by a deeper understanding and a tangible current of desire that flows between you.
In the days that follow, the air seems charged with a new energy. You notice the way Alexia's touches linger a little longer, the way her kisses are filled with a gentle urgency that wasn’t there before. Conversations take on a more flirtatious tone, filled with playful teasing and soft, suggestive glances. The connection between you feels more electric, more alive, as if the boundaries between affection and desire have become wonderfully blurred.
One evening, after a particularly busy day, you find yourselves curled up on the couch together. The soft light of the lamp casts a warm glow around the room, creating an intimate cocoon where it’s just the two of you. Alexia’s head rests on your shoulder, her fingers tracing delicate patterns on your arm as you talk about your day.
“I’ve been thinking a lot about what we talked about,” Alexia murmurs, her voice low and warm. Her breath tickles your skin, sending a shiver of anticipation through you. “I’m really glad we had that conversation.”
“Me too,” you reply, your voice soft. “I feel like things are... different now, in a good way.”
Alexia lifts her head, her eyes meeting yours with a sparkle of playful mischief. “Different how?” she asks, her voice taking on a teasing edge.
You smile, feeling a flush of warmth at her proximity. “Well, for one, there’s this new... tension between us,” you say, your words coming out with a hint of nervousness and excitement. “I feel it every time we’re close.”
Alexia’s smile widens, her eyes darkening with a mix of affection and desire. “I’ve noticed that too,” she says softly. She leans in, her lips brushing against yours in a tender kiss that quickly deepens into something more passionate. Her hands find their way to your face, cupping it gently as her kisses grow more fervent.
As the days pass, the physical connection between you both becomes more intense. You find yourselves stealing kisses whenever you can, your touches lingering with a newfound intensity. Each caress, each look, becomes a promise of what’s to come, a gentle build-up to the moment when you’ll finally give in to the desire that’s been growing between you.
With your heart full of anticipation and a touch of nervousness, you decide to make tonight special. Something that reflects the tender connection you both cherish. You spend the afternoon preparing, wanting every detail to be perfect.
The apartment is filled with the warm, inviting scent of your cooking. You’ve prepared a simple yet elegant dinner, something that you know Alexia loves. The table is set with your best dishes, a bottle of wine breathing on the side, and soft, flickering candlelight casting a golden glow over everything. The lights are dimmed, the apartment bathed in a warm, romantic ambiance that feels almost magical.
You’ve added little touches around the room. Fresh flowers in a vase on the table, the soft strains of music playing in the background, the living room rearranged slightly to create a more intimate setting. It’s a space that feels safe and inviting, designed to make tonight memorable.
As the time draws near, you catch yourself fidgeting with the edges of your dress, smoothing out invisible wrinkles, adjusting the candles on the table one last time. There’s a nervous flutter in your stomach, a mix of excitement and anxiety as you wait for Alexia to arrive. You want everything to be perfect, but more than that, you want to show her just how much she means to you.
As the final touches are set, you hear the front door creak open, and your heart skips a beat. You quickly smooth down the fabric of your dress, a soft blush warming your cheeks. You’ve chosen something special for tonight. An elegant dress that flows gracefully, making you feel beautiful and confident, even if your heart is still racing with anticipation.
When Alexia steps into the apartment, she pauses in the doorway, her eyes widening slightly as she takes in the sight of you. Her reaction is immediate and genuine. A wide, happy smile spreads across her face, lighting up her features. For a moment, she just stands there, staring at you as if she’s seeing you for the first time. The look of admiration in her eyes makes your heart swell with warmth.
“Wow,” she breathes out, her voice tinged with awe. “You look... increíble, amor. So beautiful.” She takes a step closer, her gaze sweeping over you with a mixture of affection and admiration. “I—I’m so lucky,” she stammers, her usual confident demeanor giving way to a shy, almost bashful expression.
You feel a blush rise to your cheeks at her praise, and you can’t help but smile shyly. “Thank you,” you reply, feeling a rush of warmth from her words. The way she’s looking at you makes you feel like the most beautiful person in the world.
Alexia’s gaze then shifts momentarily to her own outfit—casual training wear that she’s clearly worn just for comfort. She shifts her weight from one foot to the other, a slight blush creeping up her cheeks as she nervously tugs at the hem of her sweatshirt. “Oh, I, um... I didn’t realize I’d be, uh, underdressed,” she stammers, her eyes flitting between you and her own attire. “I didn’t expect—”
You cut her off gently, stepping closer and taking her hand in yours. “You look great,” you say sincerely, giving her a reassuring squeeze. “I love how soft and relaxed you look. I just wanted to make tonight special for you, for us. It’s not about the clothes. It’s about being together.”
Alexia’s blush deepens, but she seems to relax at your words. She looks into your eyes with a mixture of gratitude and affection. “Thank you,” she says, her voice softening. “You really didn’t have to do all this, but it means so much that you did.”
Without another word, she leans in and presses a tender kiss to your lips. The kiss is warm and full of affection, a perfect encapsulation of the love and understanding that has blossomed between you. When she pulls back, her eyes are filled with a soft, loving glow. “I’m really lucky to have you,” she murmurs, her voice full of emotion.
Her words are reassuring, and you feel your nervousness begin to fade, replaced by a sense of calm. You lead her to the table, pulling out her chair before taking your seat across from her. The candles flicker between you, casting soft shadows on her face as she looks at you with a tenderness that makes your heart swell.
Dinner is a quiet, intimate affair. The conversation flows easily, filled with laughter and shared glances that say more than words ever could. The food is delicious, but it’s the company that truly makes the evening special. With each passing moment, the connection between you deepens, the unspoken promise of what’s to come lingering in the air.
After the last bite of dessert, Alexia leans back in her chair, her eyes never leaving yours. “This was amazing,” she says, her voice low and warm. “Thank you for doing all of this.”
You smile, feeling a flush of pride at her words. “I’m glad you liked it. I just wanted us to have a night that’s... just for you, for us.”
Alexia’s eyes soften even more, and she reaches across the table to take your hand, her thumb gently stroking the back of it. “You’ve made me feel so special tonight,” she murmurs, her voice filled with emotion. “And I want to make sure you feel the same.”
The intensity in her gaze sends a shiver down your spine, but it’s a different kind of shiver than the anxiety you’ve felt before. It’s one of anticipation, of knowing that you’re about to share something incredibly intimate and meaningful with the person you love. You nod, unable to find the right words to express what you’re feeling, but knowing that she understands.
She stands, pulling you up with her, and with a gentle smile, she leads you into the living room. The atmosphere here is even more intimate, the music playing softly in the background, the candles you’d placed around the room casting a soft, romantic glow. Alexia pauses in the middle of the room, turning to face you, her hands resting lightly on your waist.
She looks at you with such affection, such care, that it takes your breath away. “Are you okay?” she asks softly, her voice filled with concern and love. “We can take things slow, amor. There’s no rush.”
You nod, your heart full of love for her. “I’m okay,” you reply, your voice steady despite the fluttering in your chest. “I want this... with you.”
Alexia’s smile is soft and full of warmth. She leans in, pressing a gentle kiss to your lips, one that speaks of all the tenderness she feels for you. The kiss deepens slowly, her hands moving up to cup your face, her thumbs brushing your cheeks in a gesture that is both protective and loving.
As the kiss lingers, your hands find their way to her back, holding her close, feeling the warmth of her body against yours. The room seems to fade away, leaving just the two of you in this bubble of intimacy. The fears and doubts that had once clouded your mind now seem distant, replaced by the certainty that this moment, this connection, is exactly where you’re meant to be.
When she pulls back slightly, her forehead resting against yours, you can see the love and desire in her eyes, tempered by the same care she’s shown throughout the night. “I want you to feel safe with me,” she whispers, her breath warm against your skin. “And I want you to tell me if there’s anything you need, anything you want.”
You nod, your heart swelling with emotion. “I feel safe with you,” you say, your voice trembling slightly with the depth of your feelings. “And I want to be with you... just like this.”
Her smile is full of understanding, and she takes your hand, leading you to the couch where you’d spent so many nights talking, laughing, and just being together. But tonight, it feels different. There’s a sense of anticipation, of something new and beautiful blooming between you.
She sits down, pulling you gently onto her lap, her arms wrapping around you in a way that feels both protective and possessive. Her lips find yours again, the kiss slow and tender, her hands exploring your body with a softness that speaks of her care for you. You feel her breath hitch slightly as her hands move over the curves of your body, her desire evident but tempered by the gentle way she touches you.
You respond in kind, your hands moving through her hair, down her back, holding her close as you both sink deeper into the kiss. The world outside ceases to exist, leaving just the two of you, wrapped in the warmth of each other’s embrace.
Her lips trail from your mouth to your neck, pressing soft, open-mouthed kisses along your skin, each one sending a shiver of pleasure through you. Her hands continue their gentle exploration, never rushing, always mindful of the pace you’ve set together. You can feel the tension in her body, the restraint she’s holding onto, and it only makes you love her more.
You shift slightly, straddling her lap, your hands resting on her shoulders as you look into her eyes. “Alexia,” you whisper, your voice filled with all the love and desire you feel. “I want this... with you.”
Her eyes darken with desire, but there’s also a softness there, a tenderness that reassures you. “I want this too,” she murmurs, her hands settling on your hips, holding you close. “More than anything.”
The moment feels like it’s wrapped in a cocoon of warmth and mutual affection. Alexia’s fingers gently trace the curves of your waist, and you can feel the connection between you growing stronger with each passing second.
Suddenly, with a playful glint in her eye, Alexia shifts slightly beneath you and starts to rise. You yelp in surprise, your arms tightening instinctively around her shoulders as she lifts you effortlessly from her lap. Her strength is both reassuring and exhilarating, a reminder of her athletic prowess.
“Whoa, careful!” you laugh nervously, gripping her tightly as she stands up. Her eyes sparkle with mischief, and she chuckles softly at your reaction.
“Relax,” Alexia teases gently, her voice low and soothing. “I’ve got you. I’m an athlete, remember?” She holds you securely against her, her muscles flexing as she adjusts her grip to make sure you’re comfortable.
With a tender smile, Alexia walks slowly towards the bed, her steps measured and deliberate. As she reaches the edge of the mattress, she carefully lowers you onto the soft surface. Despite her careful movements, you cling to her, your arms wrapped around her neck as if reluctant to let go.
She pauses for a moment, her eyes roaming over your body with a mixture of admiration and affection. Her gaze lingers on you, taking in the sight of you stretched out on the bed, your dress clinging to your form in a way that makes her eyes darken with desire.
A warm, affectionate smile spreads across her face as she looks up at you. The connection between you both feels electric, charged with an intensity that makes your heart race. Without breaking eye contact, Alexia leans down and presses a gentle kiss to your lips. The kiss is soft and lingering, a promise of the intimacy to come.
As she deepens the kiss, she begins to lay her own weight down beside you, her body pressing against yours with a comforting warmth. You can feel her heartbeat against your chest, syncing with your own in a rhythm that feels perfectly natural.
Her hands explore your dress, her fingers tracing along the fabric as she starts to unfasten it. You help her, your movements synchronized as you pull the dress up and over your head. The dress slides off with a soft rustle, leaving you in your underwear.
Alexia’s fingers trail along your exposed skin, her touch light and teasing. She smiles up at you, her gaze filled with adoration. “You look beautiful,” she murmurs, her voice low and sincere. The way she looks at you makes you feel cherished, every inch of you appreciated.
She then starts to peel off her tracksuit, her movements slightly awkward as she tries to juggle her clothing while maintaining her focus on you. You help her, your fingers brushing against her skin as you assist with removing the tracksuit. Her clothes fall to the floor in a soft heap, leaving her in a simple, form-fitting top and underwear.
With the room filled with a tender, expectant silence, you take a deep breath, your fingers hovering hesitantly above her skin. You let your hands drift toward her chest, your heart racing with a mix of excitement and nervousness. You want to trace your fingers over her beautiful breasts, but you hesitate, unsure if you’re crossing any boundaries.
Shyly, you lift your gaze to meet hers, seeking reassurance in her eyes. The vulnerability in your expression is met with a soft, reassuring smile from Alexia. Her eyes, full of warmth and encouragement, seem to invite you to continue.
“Está bien, amor,” she whispers in Spanish, her voice soothing and full of affection. She gently takes your hands in hers, guiding them with a loving touch to cup her breasts. The warmth of her skin beneath your palms is both exhilarating and comforting.
As you make contact, Alexia lets out a soft, breathy moan, a sound so beautiful and intimate that it sends a shiver of pleasure through you. The sound resonates deeply within you, amplifying the connection you share and making you feel incredibly close to her.
With a gentle yet assertive grace, Alexia begins to take more control of the moment. She shifts her weight slightly, pressing her body more firmly against yours, allowing her warmth and softness to envelop you. Her hands glide over your body with a tenderness that feels both exhilarating and reassuring.
“Just let me guide you,” she murmurs softly, her voice a mix of confidence and tenderness. “Tell me what you like, and we’ll explore this together.”
You nod, your breath coming in soft, uneven gasps as you let her lead. Her fingers trail down your sides, exploring your curves with a careful touch that sends waves of pleasure through you. She lifts her gaze to yours, searching for any sign of hesitation, and you respond with a soft, encouraging smile, giving her the silent permission she needs.
Alexia’s hands continue their journey, gently slipping beneath the waistband of your underwear. She eases them down slowly, her movements deliberate and careful as she uncovers your skin. The cool air against your exposed core contrasts with the warmth of her touch, intensifying the sensations you're experiencing.
As she removes your underwear completely, she turns her attention to her own, her fingers deftly working to peel them away. The sight of her undressing, her body illuminated by the soft light, makes your heart race with anticipation. When she finally discards her last piece of clothing, she pauses, letting you take in the beauty of her fully exposed form.
Overwhelmed by the intimacy of the moment, you slowly shift into a sitting position on the bed, reaching out to wrap your arms around her. The softness of her skin against your body is electrifying, and you hold her close, your breath mingling with hers.
You lean in to plant gentle kisses on her exposed breasts, your lips brushing against her warm skin with a reverence that conveys just how much you adore her. Each kiss is tender, filled with love and a desire to show her how much she means to you.
You then trail your kisses down her left inner arm, admiring the beauty of her tattoo as your lips make contact with her skin, adding a layer of intimacy and appreciation to the tattoo. You slowly and softly set you teeth in her soft flesh.
The sensation of your kisses and bites elicits a soft, appreciative sigh from Alexia, her body responding to the gentle affection. “I like that,” she murmurs softly, her voice laced with warmth and pleasure. “It feels so good.”
She continues to revel in the intimacy you’re sharing, her hands tenderly caressing your back as you continue to kiss her. The closeness between you both becomes even more palpable, each touch and kiss a testament to your deep connection.
After a while, with a loving and considerate touch, Alexia gently guides you back onto the bed. “Let’s take our time,” she says softly, her voice filled with reassurance. As she helps you settle onto your back, her gaze remains tender and attentive, ensuring you feel both comfortable and cherished.
Once you’re comfortably situated, Alexia positions herself above you with a graceful and deliberate motion. Her core makes contact with yours, and she begins to move with a slow, rhythmic motion. She rocks back and forth with a gentle, deliberate pace, creating a sensation that blends pleasure with the perfect amount of pressure.
Her movements are tender yet purposeful, each shift and glide against you enhancing the intimate connection you’re experiencing together. The rhythm she sets is both soothing and stimulating, allowing you to fully immerse yourself in the shared moment of closeness. The feeling of her body moving against yours is a harmonious dance of pleasure and tenderness, deepening the bond you share and making each moment feel incredibly special.
As the pleasure builds, you finally allow yourself to be vocal about how good she makes you feel. Soft, breathy moans escape your lips, each sound a testament to the intensity of the sensations coursing through you. You find yourself unable to keep quiet, your voice betraying the immense pleasure you’re experiencing. The sounds you make only seem to encourage Alexia, her own movements becoming more attuned to your responses, amplifying the mutual pleasure you both are sharing.
As the pleasure between you builds, Alexia’s focus remains unwaveringly on you. Her eyes, filled with a mix of adoration and passion, roam over your face and body. “You’re so beautiful,” she whispers, her voice tender and filled with genuine appreciation. “And you make me feel so incredible.”
Her words are a soothing balm, adding to the warmth of the moment. The pleasure between you becomes almost overwhelming, and in the throes of it, her movements start to quicken. The rhythm of her grinding grows faster, her passion driving her actions as she becomes more lost in the sensation.
In her heightened state of desire, Alexia’s hand reaches out and firmly grabs your right breast, her fingers pinching your nipple roughly. The unexpected intensity makes you gasp in surprise, your body reacting sharply to the sensation. Her eyes widen in alarm as she notices your reaction, and she immediately halts her movements.
“Oh mierda, lo siento, lo siento mucho,” she breathes, her voice laced with concern. “I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
Despite the sudden stop, the sensation had been unexpectedly pleasurable, and you find yourself blushing, feeling exposed but also intrigued. You look up at her, your cheeks flushed with a mix of embarrassment and arousal. “It, um, actually felt good,” you admit shyly. “If you want to, you can continue.”
Alexia’s expression shifts from concern to a warm, relieved smile. Her eyes reflect a blend of affection and excitement as she takes your words to heart. “Are you sure?” she asks softly, her voice tender and filled with a gentle eagerness.
You nod, feeling a newfound confidence in sharing your desires. “Yes, I’m sure,” you affirm. “I trust you, and I want to experience this with you.”
With your reassurance, Alexia resumes her movements, her touch becoming more deliberate and attentive as she finds a rhythm that balances both pleasure and sensitivity. Her continued exploration of your body is filled with a renewed passion and care, ensuring that every moment is both thrilling and deeply intimate.
As the sensations between you intensify, Alexia’s movements become a rhythmic dance of passion and tenderness. Her body rocks gently but purposefully against yours, each motion sending waves of pleasure through you. She maintains a steady gaze, her eyes never leaving yours, communicating unspoken affection and desire.
“You feel so amazing,” she murmurs softly, her voice a tender caress against your ear. “I love the way you respond to me.”
Her words are a constant comfort, her sweet reassurances adding an extra layer of intimacy to the moment. She leans down to kiss you, her lips finding yours with a fervent yet gentle touch. The kiss is a melding of emotions, a silent conversation of love and longing that deepens with each passing second.
As the pleasure reaches its peak, her hands move with a delicate precision, enhancing the sensations and making sure you feel cherished and adored. She holds you close, her body pressed against yours, and the steady rhythm of her movements becomes a perfect symphony of shared ecstasy.
The culmination of your mutual pleasure comes as a breathtaking crescendo. You both feel the rush of release, a powerful and overwhelming wave that washes over you, leaving you breathless and blissful. Alexia’s soft, contented moans mix with your own vocal expressions of pleasure, creating a harmony that is both beautiful and deeply personal.
You kiss her tenderly, your lips moving in a gentle rhythm that matches the lingering waves of pleasure. The kiss is a promise of love and devotion, a sweet exchange that further cements the bond you share. Her hands cradle your face, her touch tender and reassuring as she pulls back slightly to look into your eyes.
“Thank you for being so amazing,” you whisper, your voice filled with genuine affection. “I’ve never felt this close to anyone before.”
Alexia’s eyes shine with a mix of love and satisfaction. “It’s because of you,” she replies softly. “You’ve made this so special. I love you so much.”
As the euphoria of the moment begins to settle, Alexia’s teasing smile makes a reappearance, her eyes twinkling with playful affection. She leans in close, brushing a strand of hair from your face before speaking, her tone light yet filled with meaning.
“I don’t stand a chance of having a normal life with you, do I?” she teases, her voice laced with warmth. “You’ve made me want to do this with you every single moment, exploring new things, finding out what we both like. We’re just getting started, and I’m so excited to explore even more with you.”
She punctuates her words with that little shy smile of hers, the one that always manages to melt your heart. It’s a perfect blend of her natural confidence and the sweet, awkward vulnerability that makes her so endearing.
You can’t help but laugh softly at her words, feeling both exhilarated and a little overwhelmed by the intensity of your connection. “Gosh, what have I gotten myself into?” you tease back, your tone playful but your heart swelling with affection.
Alexia chuckles, her smile widening as she leans down to kiss you again, this time more slowly, savoring the moment. “Whatever it is, I hope you’re ready for it,” she murmurs against your lips, her voice carrying both a promise and a challenge.
“I am,” you whisper back, feeling a surge of anticipation for the adventures yet to come.
With her by your side, you’re ready to explore everything. Every desire, every emotion, every new discovery. As you lie there in each other’s arms, the future feels wide open, full of possibility, and you know without a doubt that you’re exactly where you’re meant to be.
As you hold Alexia close, the warmth of her embrace and the depth of your connection make you realize how unfounded your doubts had been. In this moment of intimacy and understanding, you know with certainty that your fears were unnecessary, and that what you share is stronger and more beautiful than you ever imagined.
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Note: I realize that some transitions might not be as smooth as l'd like, and plan to refine them later. I just wanted to share this now, even though I haven't done a thorough grammar check yet. Please be gentle with your feedback!
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dvrk-moon · 6 months
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ENHYPEN ; 엔하이픈
HAVING AN IDOL S/O
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requested : yes!!!
genre : fluff, crack
pairing : enhypen ot7 x fem!reader
warnings : cursing, this is long asfk LOL
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HEESEUNG ; 희승
so you two trained together
and you mutually liked each other while training but didn’t really talk much
you ended up leaving bighit in early 2018 and going to train at cube instead
so you lost contact
but you ended up debuting as the maknae of (g)i-dle
and since you debuted before enhypen, you were more well known than they were initially
you were one of the more famous members in the group in korea, so your face was pretty inescapable
so imagine heeseung’s reaction when he sees a birthday ad for you for the first time
mind literally blown
so he’s like looking you and your group up to see if it’s really you (it is)
and he’s like damn i gotta get in contact with her again
but he doesn’t have an opportunity because even from a friends standpoint, he didn’t really have time because he had to focus on training and eventually going through i-land
ok skip forward and he’s debuted yay!!!!!
so you had a promotion period that’d lined up around a year and a half later where you made a duo debut with your member shuhua while enha was promoting manifesto
and heeseung saw you backstage once
between him seeing you for the first time up until that point he’d literally been trying to find out how to talk to you again
and this was his opportunity!
so before you went to perform heeseung approached you randomly
and lowkey you’d forgotten about heeseung until you saw him again lol
and you’re like oh hey… so awkward because what do you genuinely say to someone you haven’t talked to in like four years
but when you remember that he’s the heeseung that you talked to during your trainee days (the same heeseung you had a thing for) you are more willing to talk to him
but then your conversation is cut short because you have to go perform your song
when you come back, he’s still waiting for you :((((
like that man is COMMITTED to getting to talk to you again
so then after like thirty minutes of talking (right before he has to go promote his song) he finally gets the courage to ask for your number
and you’re like shit yeah
so he texts you like every day
and during your overlapping promotions, he tries to meet up with you backstage as frequently as possible
so eventually you gain feelings for him again (and he obviously does for you) and you start hanging out
but then he goes on tour for a while
you miss him a lot
and he misses you a lot
so when he comes back, he impulsively like picked you up while hugging and you’re like um okay MARRY ME
one hangout he finally asks you out (as more than friends) and you’re so excited
so you quickly begin dating :)
dating him is definitely like dating your number one supporter
like he makes it a point to meet you backstage (even if you don’t have an overlapping promotion) and he makes you teach him your choreography
and you’re like “heeseung i can teach you this at your or my dorm” and he’s like “nope i need everyone here to know that you only teach me your dances”
you’re like “???” but don’t question it bc he’s just odd
he prefers you to go over to his dorms because of his solo room but he’s not opposed to making friends with your members even though they’re all older than him
just know if you go over to enha’s dorms though they will 100% try to be around you all the time
and don’t get heeseung wrong, he obviously wanted the members to like you, but he also wasn’t anticipating his own girlfriend being stolen from him
you almost get caught by dispatch a couple times
but dispatch fr fr catches him at MAMA
like this man was so protective of his idol image for so long and the he watched your performance and dispatch was like “WRITE THAT DOWN WRITE THAT DOWN”
does not gaf if you’re exposed tho bc he’s like “yup that’s my girlfriend suck it she’s MINE”
JAY ; 제이
so you debuted before him
by like a year and a half, so like january 2019
you were one of the members of itzy, which was the talk of the town for quite some time
and jay was actually a huge fan of your group since he was a trainee
your group had a few hit songs in korea but jay made it seem like every song of yours (yes this includes b sides)
you’d been his bias since your teaser dropped ofc
and he made it everyone’s problem to listen to your music during practice
even during i-land there were clips of him doing the shoulder move from ‘wannabe’
but i digress
so once his debut place is secured as of i-land episode 12 he was so excited that he might have the opportunity of meeting you
but like. he had to be normal about it
so he freaked out about you respectfully
but “respectfully” to him was mentioning you as his role model and ideal type
on like every variety program possible
like damn we get it!!!!
but your and his companies thought it would be just so silly and funny if they brought you out to meet him the next time he mentioned you
and so they did exactly that!!!
he was on weekly idol and all of a sudden you came out from where the staff were filming
he actually almost fainted on the spot
and you thought it was sooo cute that he was that flattered over meeting you
so you approached him and asked him for his number
cue him almost passing out pt 2
but you end up talking quite a bit
like u come visit him quite often and he comes to visit you
and he like is literally like the perfect talking stage
so it takes like zero time for you guys to actually start dating
but when he can’t visit you he’s texting you all the time
“your stage was so good how are you real”
always buying albums for each other for support
and he’s like $$ so he buys a ton of yours (and of his if you want some)
he gets so excited when he pulls your photocard and is so happy when you pull his because he thinks it’s fate
but the one time he caught riki’s photocard in the back of your phone he swapped it out for his almost immediately
he always jokes about his bias being yuna, and so you’ve started to make a point of saying your bias is jungwon and sunghoon
and because you did that you took a picture of you and jungwon once to send to him like “proof that my bias is jungwon”
that pic became his lock screen btw
you one time said that you were an enhypen fan and midzy and engene were freaking out
they were like “just date already smh”
little did they know that you already were!
JAKE ; 제이크
you were a year and a half their junior
and you debuted in kep1er
so the time that they were promoting blessed cursed you were promoting wa da da
and like you’d just debuted too
so you had just done a stage and were on your way to your groups van to go back to the dorms
and you go to enter the first black van you see with an open door
and instead of your members you’re met with jake sunghoon sunoo!
you turned red immediately and ran in the other direction to actually find your van where yujin, yeseo, chaehyun, and hiyyih were waiting for you
you told your members and they thought it was so funny
but jokes on them
because the very next week, jake had accidentally walked into your waiting room at mcountdown
who’s laughing now!!! (you are)
after the incident, he found you and came to apologize for walking in
and you were like “ohhh that’s so funny because i actually was the one who came into your van last week!”
but after the apologies were exchanged, you two ended up walking around backstage anyways and just talking about anything and everything
after you and your members had to go perform, jake just waited for you backstage
and once you were done performing you came back and talked to him more ! yay !
but then soon enha had to go on to perform b-c and by the time he came back, your group had already left :’(
it’s okay though because you left your phone number on a post-it that said “FOR JAKE” in their waiting room
enhypen teased him so hard but he was like whatever at least i got her number
so he texted you like almost immediately
soon after, you two texted like all the time and started meeting backstage whenever it was possible
jake asked you out for the first time right before you went on stage to perform and obviously you said yes
but when you went to perform, your voice was such a bright red color that it went viral amongst kep1ians (and later other fandoms)
after that stage, jake and you just sat and talked in the kep1er waiting room for sooooo long
he’s literally the biggest fan of your group
like he’s so open and genuine about how much he likes your group, and he always somehow has one of your songs on his recommendation playlists
and those songs will somehow always be sandwiched between the most beautiful love songs ever and it makes engenes go 🤨🤨
you also are open about being a fan of them
so basically your fans and his have already put two and two together very quickly
but the suspicions were confirmed when he posted a late-night river view picture on weverse and then you posted something extremely similar a couple days later
winning the idgaf war about people finding out though
like he’s like DONTTTT CAREEEEE <3 MY GF
he actually thinks it’d be better if people knew so that no one would try anything on you because you’re taken
SUNGHOON ; 성훈
you were the seventh member of ive, also known as wonyoung’s group
and like wonyoung is your bff
she knew you found sunghoon cute from all the times you’d asked her if you could come visit her on music bank days
so she wanted to play matchmaker!
(love me not reference?!?!)
anyways
she gets “sick” once and is like “hey y/n why don’t you stand in for me?”
and you’re like “yeah sure whatever idc it’s chill”
it’s not chill
for reference, sunghoon also thought it was going to be chill, because he had no idea that you were standing in for wonyoung
little did wonyoung know, sunghoon also found you very attractive
ofc he would’ve tried to get your number through wonyoung, but he was too introverted to even think about it
so when you get there, both of your faces are pretty red, but your cheeks at least cool down by the time you’re recording
his do not 😭
he’s like sneaking looks at you and shit
he thought he was being so subtle too about it like bye 😭😭
but fans love the interactions!!!!
and they’re sooooo stoked to have jungwon sunoo and sunghoon on the radio that you host after the fact
sunghoon fucking DRESSES for the occasion too like damn
and like you made a point to be like “nice outfit”
on the outside he was like “yeah it’s whatever” but on the inside he was shitting his pants
anyways
and so you asked him for his number because you wanted “fashion tips” (you’re a liar)
so the first time he asks you out he’s like “let me style u an outfit”
and then while doing that he’s like “let’s date!”
and you’re like “well alright”
(jk u were just as stoked)
and dating him is so relieving
because you don’t have to keep the relationship (at least beyond friends) a secret
fans love the interactions
and so when you guys actually announce the relationship everyone is so hyped
like they already expected it
but still
he never misses an opportunity to talk about you on live or on a variety show
the interviewer is like “so, sunghoon, what was your favorite part of this comeback?”
he thinks for a second. then all of a sudden, “well y/n-”
like bro we get it
he just does not even care tho bc he’s so down bad
SUNOO ; 선우
okay now so remember when sunoo was a radio dj?
yeah
so you debuted in billlie, and your song, gingamingayo had just been released
and sunoo had heard it quite a few times already on his dj show
and he’s like “ok damn i get it let me look up the song”
he became a fan so quickly
like learned the choreo and everything
so the following week on the radio show he’s like “oh have you guys heard this song it’s so good actually i’m a fan of this group”
and then BOOM next week you’re on the show he radio djs for
chemistry between u guys went CRAZY
and then you filmed a tiktok together
and posted it like a week after the radio episode had gone viral
engenes and belllie’ves went crazy
you guys had already exchanged numbers at that point too
so getting to laugh about your fans freaking out was super fun to you two
you started visiting him at radio show schedules in secret after the fact
so he ends up asking you out about a month later
and ofc you say yes
so once you started dating, he would visit you at your schedules a lot
you would often pretend to be a staff member at the radio show so you could be there without raising much question
but then one time you were a “special guest” on the radio show again, and you filmed another tiktok, but this time it wasn’t like one of your group’s dance challenges
it was like a cute trend
so once you got the okay to post it, you did
this confirmed to engenes and belllie’ves that you were friends at the very least
he always finds a way to sing your songs on live
doesn’t ever sing when it’s your part though 🤨🤨🤨 it’s almost like he wants to hear your voice
one time he came to one of your fansigns “anonymously”
people found out it was him so quickly 😭
he’s so shameless about people knowing though
after that, fans basically already know you’re dating even if you don’t outright say anything
nobody actually cares though
they’re just waiting for that third y/noo tiktok 🙏
JUNGWON ; 정원
you debuted in illit, as a result of the belift survival show “r u next?”
you came in first place, just like jungwon did on i-land
so naturally, under the same sublabel, illit and enhypen passed each other quite frequently
you’ve actually interacted quite a bit with the other members
but for some reason, their leader was a bit standoffish to you
and you had absolutely no idea why he would be
you thought that maybe it was because you’d also come in first place on your respective survival show, so maybe he had one sided beef with you?
it didn’t make sense but that’s just what you assumed
actually ☝️🤓 jungwon had a big fat crush on you
and had no idea what to do about it
like he secretly supported you on r u next? and everything
so eventually, belift decides to make a variety show for illit and enha
as the first place winners, you two are paired together, along with your japanese maknaes, ni-ki and iroha
iroha and ni-ki were already acquainted, so iroha told ni-ki about how funny it was that you and jungwon were in the same group, given that jungwon hated you
and ni-ki’s like ?!
so he like goes up to jungwon and is like “she thinks you hate her bro”
he’s so embarrassed to find out that you thought he hated you
ni-ki teases him so hard about it
so eventually jungwon admits to you (off-camera) that he doesn’t hate you, and in fact he’s quite fond of you
it lifts the biggest weight off his chest when you also admit that you’re fond of him, and that he was your role model ever since you’d joined r u next?
after filming, you two exchange numbers
he’s such a baby like seriously how could you think he hated you
it doesn’t take long AT ALL for you to start dating
in fact hybe/belift encourages it because they think it’ll be good exposure for both groups
and it highkey is
in korea, you guys gain the title of “first place couple” and omgggg knetz eat that up
you’re invited on a ton of variety shows together
jungwon is sooooo so supportive and is lowkey a stan of your group
he like sends you your fancams and is like “teach me this dance pls”
when your two groups pass each other in the hallways, enha and illit always make it a point to tease you two
you guys don’t mind though because at least you have each other ☝️☝️
RIKI ; 니키
you debuted as the maknae of loona
so you’d been in the industry a few years longer than enhypen had
so riki knew of you, but you weren’t super familiar with them
but the both of you were invited onto a variety program for foreign idols
you ended up becoming more familiar with them after being paired together with riki for a couple challenges
one interaction you had made you two go completely viral after executing a twice choreography together extremely well
both bbc and belift saw this as an opportunity to make some money, so they kinda forced you and riki to get close
little did they know that’s what you both wanted anyways lol
so like you’ll have a live with him
or you’ll film a tiktok together
or you’ll post something together
etc
somewhere along the lines you two start dating in secret
namely after you two filmed a live together
and he saw one of the comments that said “y/n please do perfect idol challenge” and you started doing the perfect idol dance on live
you started giggling because you started to forget the dance because you were embarrassed and he was smiling like a fucking maniac and then he realized he really really liked you more than a friend
and so soon after he didn’t wanna waste any more time and he just confessed that he liked you
and you were like “no way me too!!!!”
(everyone could tell)
it wasn’t super in secret though
because belift/bbc had that “bffs for life” image for you two
so you could interact freely
it just took every bone in riki’s body to not grab your hand and pull you into his arms during a dance live
but then womp womp
dispatch exposes you guys like four months into the relationship
no one cares though (except delulu fans)
so when you terminate your contract with bbc for the mistreatment, engenes beg you to audition for hybe/belift because they’re afraid if you go somewhere else you won’t be able to interact freely with him anymore and they love your interactions
you end up joining ctd, which is the company of one of the post-loona acts, along with five of your ex-members
luckily ctd is a good company so they let you and riki still stay together and still have your lives
one time riki was doing a weverse live and you showed up
and fans absolutely LOVED it
ctd is an unknown company so they unexpectedly got a lot more sales with this relationship
they were like DAMN OK
anyways
you guys teach each other your choreos A LOT
like a lot
riki eats them up so bad like fans start saying he’s the seventh member of your group 😭
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a/n : had to include illit in this somehow i love them they’re so cute. sorry for the lack of posts i am sooooooo fucking busy and this was in the drafts for forever
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juniperdugong · 2 months
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Relationship Quirks 95s ver.
Aka habits I can see the boys doing in a relationship || 95s || 96s || 97s || Maknae line ||
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Scoups Calls you his "wife" while you guys are still dating
NOT AROUND YOU... at first but I doubt that the guys wouldn't secretly take video of him whining during practice talking about, "I miss my wife..." all pouty and everything (he saw you this morning), and NOT send it to you.
He's awkward when you bring it up because he doesn't know if you feel that way about the future of your relationship but once he knows you do feel the same way WHEW you do not hear the end of it.
Suddenly, all the reservations he makes are preceded by "Well, me and my wife...", anytime you're brought up in a conversation dude glitches out and HAS to mention you as his wife at least once (especially if it's to someone he thinks might be interested in you), and the yearning only gets worse! He'll leave for tour and after he texts his customary airplane goodbye message to you your phone will be blowing up with texts from the boys complaining about having to hear their leader practically sobbing about how much he misses his wife.
Jeonghan Steals your stuff
Has big "What's yours is mine" mentality, but don't worry! What's his is yours too! He swears it! Despite the drastic difference in how much he's using, borrowing, or straight up taking your stuff...
Let's be clear though, he never takes things he thinks you'll miss and if he finishes something of yours he always makes sure to replace it pronto. If you do get upset he makes a mental note to not mess with that particular item ever again.
Have you noticed a suspicious amount of your clothing (mainly hoodies, hats, and bags) go missing and suddenly see your boyfriend wearing them during a live? Yes. Has there been multiple arguments about this behavior? For sure! Does it absolutely warm your heart when you're at a concert and see a staff member run on stage to hand Hannie his current comfort item (a childhood toy of yours that you didn't even know was missing from your room)? Absolutely, it does. (Apologizes profusely once you find out...doesn't mean a single word of it and you know it because he's giggling the whole time)
Joshua Buys 2 of everything
Since the dawn of your relationship, Shua has gotten 2 of every item he buys. His initial reason was to get to know one another better by trying out things the other liked. This then spiraled to him doubling every single grocery item, clothes he buys, and pretty much anything he orders. Could be an insanely valuable item worth thousands that he's getting paid to promote but if there isn't a matching one for you then it's off the table. And no, he doesn't necessarily want to be "matching" all the time but he likes knowing that you guys could match whenever you wanted to.
He also gets extremely offended if you question why there's so much of everything, seriously he doesn't even want to hear it, like "Because it's ours! And we share! So we need double! Do you hate me or something!?"
"Babe, why do we have so much shampoo..." "I'm promoting it." "There's 2 of every type in here." "Yep." "We don't ne-" "We do need it." "It's too much." "I don't understand what you're saying to me right now."
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A/N: The brainrot I have for these men is so real rnnnnn. I just had to separate these by years bc it was getting too long :( I'll have 96s up by today too, so stay tuned for that 96 line OUT NOW!! (Have to do it for my babe Nonu) Reblogs and Comments are much-appreciated lovelies!!
TAGLIST (open): @bemybabiibish
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misskamelie · 2 years
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perhaps send them a message at first like “Hello [name] this is [name]! I found your contact info through __ so I hope you don’t mind me messaging you here.” and if it’s not them they’ll say something
Mmm, true, that looks like the most logical option. I'll try to find a sort of middle ground between this and what I had first in mind, so thanks for the input, anon! <3
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thebigbiwolf · 11 months
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Spittle - Part 2/2 (Astarion/F!Reader)
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Summary: The chocolate seems innocent enough - if you look past the Infernal writing on the wrapper, and with so few pleasures in the wilderness, you all but jump at the chance to sneak yourself a small treat.
Unbeknownst to you, the bar is infused with succubus spittle. Just one square is rumored to contain enough potency to send a mortal into the throes of ecstasy.
This is what happens when you eat half the bar.
Fic Tags: Sex Pollen (kinda), aphrodisiacs, a bit of dom!Astarion, unprotected piv, overstimulation, he talks you through it (iykyk),
Fic Warnings: Explicit Smut (18+ MDNI), Language, No use of Y/N, magical influence
Read Part 1: Here
Read on AO3: Here
Word Count: 4k
A/N: Wow. I'll try to make this brief. First of all, I just want to say thank you all so much for your continued support. I know this took me forever to write, but I've been going through a lot of emotional turmoil with school and some health issues with my animals. Your patience means so much to me, and I can only hope this lives up to everyone's expectations! This is my first time writing smut, and ngl I feel a bit like Icarus, so let me know if y'all liked it. Last, but not least, thanks again to my bestie/beta @imaginarydromedary for holding my hand through the shame.
Astarion sits quietly beside the fire, absently picking the dirt from beneath his manicured nails. The night had unfolded like countless others before it: boring, mundane. Uneventful.
Perhaps he should retire early. The Realm According to Bumpo sits patiently atop the desk in his tent, and if he heads to bed now, he could potentially finish a chapter before his watch begins.
He stands, patting the dust off his trousers, just as Shadowheart emerges from your tent. He initially doesn’t pay her any mind - fails to notice the concern etched across her face. 
“Astarion.” 
He snaps to attention, recognizing the fear in her voice.
Astarion’s stomach sinks when their eyes meet. Shadowheart isn’t normally one to succumb to panic, but she looks as though she’s just stumbled out of a wolf’s den.
“What is it? What’s wrong?”
“I don’t know. She - I’ve never seen…” Shadowheart pauses, taking a steadying breath. “She’s feverish. She was fine only hours ago. I heard a cry from her tent and feared something was amiss. When I found her, she…” The cleric hesitates, eyes contemplative - as if weighing exactly how much she wants to reveal. 
“Out with it, damn it!”
“Is there any chance she’s been poisoned? You two stayed behind, back in the village. Did she come into contact with anything that might have pierced her skin?”
“Poisoned? No, she -” Astarion retraces the events, turning over your brief conversations in his head before landing on the only noteworthy detail he can think of.
He taps a finger on his chin, a thoughtful smile creasing his face. “Unless, of course, the Infernal chocolates didn’t agree with her.”
“I’m sorry, the what?” 
“The chocolate she found at the apothecary. I assumed she hid it away so she could enjoy her little treat, unbothered. There was Infernal text on the wrapper.”
She stares at him with wide eyes, jaw slack with disbelief. “And you didn’t think to mention this earlier?”
Astarion shrugs, unfazed.
“Where’s Wyll?”
He rolls his eyes. “How should I know? I’m not his keeper.”
“Astarion!” 
“Oh, come on. That chocolate must have been at least a decade old. Are you certain this isn’t just some sort of stomach bug?”
The cleric shoves past him, groaning in exasperation. She shoots him a glare and mutters, “I’m certain,” before jogging in the direction of Wyll’s tent. 
“Infused with succubus spittle. Just one bite will have you and that special someone rolling around for hours. Consume responsibly." 
Astarion giggles boyishly. “An aphrodisiac? How fun.”
Wyll squints as he silently reads the next bit to himself, fingers tracing the text. He turns to Shadowheart, jaw tightening, "How much of this did you say she ingested?"
"I only found half the bar."
Wyll’s expression grows more serious. "This says the recommended serving size is one square… How many squares were left?"
“Oh, gods…” she breathes, "Six."
The three exchange silent, worried glances.
“Could she die from this?” Shadowheart asks, her voice trembling with uncertainty.
Wyll’s lips press into a thin line. In truth, he doesn’t know the answer. He could ask Mizora for guidance, but the devil’s been awfully silent after his recent failures. He isn’t sure she'd be willing to answer him, let alone grant any favors. Still, it may be worth a call.
Just as Wyll’s about to suggest it, Astarion heaves a deep, dramatic sigh, throwing his hands up in defeat.
“Alright, I know what we’re all thinking. I’ll take care of this.”
The other two regard each other, thoroughly confused.
“Look," Astarion explains, I may not be well-versed in magic, or magical remedies, for that matter, but now that we know what’s causing this… I think it’s obvious what needs to be done.”
“You’re joking.” Shadowheart laughs, incredulously.  
“No,” he continues, “We can’t just sit here and hope for the best. We need to act quickly, and let's just say, this fits into my... skill set.”
“So, you’re going to, what? Have sex with her? You think she’ll be capable of saying anything but yes, given the state she’s in?”
Astarion shoots her a glare. The mere thought that he’d ever so much as suggest doing something like that - bedding you when you’re too weak to reject him - the very idea of it makes him sick. 
He isn’t that evil. 
“Watch your tongue,” he spits at her, “before I do us all the favor of removing it.”
“Hang on, you two,” Wyll interjects, “Astarion, I think you might have a point. You would know better than anyone whether she’s in a right enough state of mind to… consent to this. You’re closest to her. She trusts you.” 
He turns to Shadowheart, “It’s worth a try.”
Astarion notices two things as he pulls back the flap of your tent.
The first is that it is unseasonably warm. Scorching hot, like summer. A stark contrast from the welcoming cool of the early spring night behind him. 
And second, that the air in the tent is heavy - heady with the scent of sweat and something else he can’t quite identify. It's clouding his senses, making his head swim. The taste of it settles on his tongue, like salt on the rim of an otherwise very sweet drink.
The moonlight at his back casts a dark shadow over your sleeping form. Astarion hesitates for a moment, taking in the sight of you, vulnerable and oblivious to his presence, feeling too much like a wolf looming over a snared rabbit.
You twitch, grimacing in pain. 
He frowns. This wasn’t the way he wanted to go about seducing you. His plan was much more sophisticated: a carafe of wine, a few honeyed words leading to a night of passion, your endless thanks, all culminating in some well-earned release and his assured protection.
A mutual exchange.
But, this?
He’s roused from his thoughts by another grunt, escaping from between your clenched teeth.
Whatever you’re going through, it looks like hell.
Ugh. You know what? Fine. Maybe this isn’t the way he envisioned it, but when has life ever blessed him with a perfect scenario? He’ll offer his… services, and respect whatever answer you give him. If you refuse him now, he can always try again later. Under less perilous circumstances, provided you survive the night.
And if not, well, he's never been one to play the hero, but at least he tried. 
He steps further inside, closing the entrance behind him. The moment he seals the tent shut, there is a palpable shift. The space feels infinitely heavier, laden with unnatural energy, reminiscent of anticipation, but just slightly… off.
He breathes, trying to focus on anything but that intoxicating scent. The haze of it is maddening.
The elf sits on his knees beside you, hands resting in his lap. 
He clears his throat, hoping the sound would be enough to wake you.
There’s no response. 
He whispers your name.
Nothing.
No choice, then.
He drums a finger against your bare arm.
The cleric was right. Your skin is so hot, it borders on scalding.
Finally, you begin to stir.
-
Again. It happened again. 
As soon as you closed your eyes to rest, you saw him - That thing that wore his skin. You felt his hands and mouth as he ravaged you until you fell apart beneath him, above him, wrapped around him, like he was everywhere all at once. 
He was demanding as he took pleasure from you. Ravenous. Mocking your cries, your begging.
The hours stretched into what felt like lifetimes, and you’d nearly given up hope, resigning yourself to the idea that this was your new, endless reality. 
Until suddenly, you hear a voice that pulls you from the dark recesses of your subconscious-- the very voice being used to torture you
Your name, uttered quietly by Astarion. Just Astarion. No second, more sinister layer beneath it.
Your eyelids flutter, then widen as a chilling realization washes over you. 
He’s touching you. The pads of his fingers are both a balm and an irritant, soothing and igniting the flames licking at the corners of your mind.
“You look like you’ve seen better days.” He teases. 
You recoil from his touch, sitting upwards and crawling back away from him. 
He can’t be here. He, of all people, can’t be here.
And yet, something within you is screeching in delight.
'That’s him, isn’t it? The object of your desires? How fun!’
You swallow. Hard. 
“Astarion, I -” 
He holds up a hand, silencing you. “I’m aware.”
“Shadowheart informed us of your… predicament,” he continues, “I can’t help but feel partly responsible, seeing as I was there when you found the chocolate -”
“The chocolate? Is that - wait, what?” 
Shit. Your head is pounding. 
You press your palms against your eyes and groan. 
“I’ll spare you the details, but that chocolate was laced with succubus spittle - a highly potent aphrodisiac - and you, my dear, have consumed enough to bring an entire brothel to its knees.”
Your eyes snap open, meeting his own. There isn’t an ounce of humor in his tone. No sign of his usual mischief.
Gods, he’s being fucking serious.
“Now, as amusing as this might be if it were anyone else, I’d prefer it if our party’s leader made it out of this alive, and that leaves us with a choice."
You gaze at him silently, waiting as the candlelight paints his sharp features in warm hues of amber and honey. 
'He’s quite handsome. I see why you like him.’
“You can ride this out alone,” Astarion explains, “Shadowheart will return with her best salves and more potions for the fever. We’ll hope this passes quickly, but Wyll’s translation suggests the amount you consumed could leave you in this state for up to a week.”
Your stomach churns. You’re going to be sick.
“And the alternative?” you manage to ask.
His hand finds yours, fingers intertwining with your own. Your skin prickles at the contact.
“The alternative is that you let me help you through this. Consider it a repayment, of sorts, for gifting me your blood. I’m somewhat of an expert on… well,” he lets out a humorless laugh, “let’s just say, I’m the best chance you’ve got.”
Maybe it's the blood roaring in your ears, or maybe you’re still dreaming, but it sounds like Astarion is offering to… fuck you?
“I’m sorry, what?”
He groans, visibly frustrated. “Sex, my dear. If the magic is compelling you to have it, I think we should listen.”
‘Handsome and smart.’ 
You hiss, “Would you please shut up?”
Astarion squints. “What was that?”
“Nothing, sorry.” You clear your throat. “Listen, I - I get what you’re trying to do. I appreciate it, really, but -” 
Pain lances through your abdomen, a sharp, icy shard that interrupts your words. You clutch at your side, releasing Astarion’s hand before falling helplessly on your back, twisting in agony.
He inches closer, voice tinged with urgency. “We’re running out of time. If you want my help, it's best to ask now, because as much as I love the idea of you begging for me to bed you, I won’t be comfortable doing this unless you agree to this while you’ve still got your wits about you.” 
Tears sting the corners of your eyes, blurring your vision at the edges. He’s right. You don’t think you can endure this alone, and as much as you fucking hate to admit it, the damned succubus magic - that thing - is right.  
You do desire him. You’ve wanted him since the moment you met beside the nautiloid. Now here he is, offering to alleviate your suffering.  
There’s just one part of his offer that you can’t quite come to terms with.
“I didn’t let you drink from me because I was hoping you’d repay me.” Your voice warbles, wet and stressed, “I can’t have sex with you if it’ll just be part of some ridiculous transaction. Not with anyone, and certainly not with you.” 
His expression softens as your words sink in. It’s a confession, of sorts. The kind he’s wholly unfamiliar with. It stuns him almost to the point of speechlessness.  
“My apologies. Believe me, it was more of an excuse than anything. I didn’t mean to suggest…” He lets his words trail off, shaking his head. You two can revisit this conversation later, when time isn’t of the essence. “It doesn’t matter. I want to do this. Let me help you.” 
The sincerity in his voice sends a shiver up your spine.
It’s clear he means this.
He means every word. 
You nod. “Okay.”
Astarion clears his throat, rolling the tension off his shoulders. 
“Good. Now that we’ve got that taken care of,” he says as he throws one of his legs over your waist, straddling you, “Why don’t you lie back and let me take care of this, hm?” 
His posture is relaxed. Confident. He regards you with hooded eyes and the faintest hint of a smirk. It’s quite the sight, one you’d enjoy significantly more if your body wasn’t busy screaming for his attention. 
His deft hands make quick work of the laces of your shirt, and with every string that loosens, your composure unravels further. You squirm, unable to resist the heat that teases your skin and the growing itch beneath it. 
As if Astarion can sense your rising panic, he places a cool palm against your burning cheek, his touch both gentle and practiced as he rubs smooth circles at the dip of your temple. 
“Relax, dear,” he whispers, both a request and a command. The gentle lilt in his voice masks the underlying authority, but your body obeys all the same, tension releasing from your muscles. “I’ve got you.”
Astarion quickly rids you of the offending fabric, chest and stomach now bared to him. His eyes scan over your form with focused intensity, lips pinched between his teeth, like an artist deciding what to make of their blank canvas.
“Normally, I’d take my time with this,” he admits, “but given the circumstances…” He swiftly undoes the buttons of your trousers before yanking them off along with your smallclothes. One single, fluid motion. 
He can’t hide the mild shock that follows when he sees the state of you - dripping wet, red and pulsing with need. 
He dips the tip of his finger between your folds. It glides over velvet skin, coating the digit in warm, wet slick. A strangled, pitiful noise escapes from your throat.
For a moment, Astarion’s calculated expression falters, surprised by the rate at which your body opens itself up to him. A glint of hunger lurks beneath the surface.
“This may be easier than I thought.” He says with a smirk, more to himself than to you. 
He presses two digits in, slow and intentional. There’s no resistance; A knife through warm butter. You’re dripping down his knuckles, gripping around him like a vice. He slides all the way in until the heel of his palm meets your clit. 
“Breathe.” 
Not even realizing you’d been holding your breath, you release it with a shutter.
“Very good.” He punctuates his words with the slow drag of his fingers. Long, languid movements. He’s taking his sweet time with you, pulling scandalous little cries from your lips. It’s like he’s toying with you - seeing how long you can hold out before breaking. 
It doesn’t take much time at all.
“Astarion -”
“Yes?”
“Please.”
“Please, what? What do you need, darling?” His eyes are fixed on your own, grin tugging at the edge of his mouth. A cat playing with a cornered mouse.
“More. Anything.” 
He hums in approval, then wets the pad of his thumb on his tongue before drawing circles exactly where you need. Heat coils at the base of your spine, forming a ball of tension that threatens to snap. 
The sheer intensity of it is enough to scare you, caught between the urge to chase the sensation or flee from it. “Astarion, I -” 
He ignores your warning as if he hadn’t heard it, plunging his fingers into your heat and curling them - expertly caressing a spot that threatens to shatter you. Your hands fly out, gripping the fabric of his shirt, the sheets beneath you, anything in a desperate attempt to ground yourself.
“Go on, love. Let it out. I’ve got you.” 
Your body seizes as your orgasm tears through you, igniting every one of your oversensitive nerves. Back arching off the bedroll, several strangled sounds - almost pained - rip from your throat. The pleasure threatens to tear you apart, but the thick fog of lust occupying your mind begins to subside, offering the slightest bit of clarity as you twitch beneath him. 
Astarion grabs you by the jaw, tilting your head this way and that, admiring his handiwork. He's quite pleased with himself, with the mess he's made of you - jaw slack and brows pinched. He coaxes out the aftershocks, watching you squeeze around his fingers.
"There,” he gives you a playful pat on the cheek, "You're looking better already." 
"You're - agh - enjoying this too much."
"I never said I wasn't going to enjoy it." 
A beat of silence passes between the two of you as he allows you to catch your breath. For a moment, you think the coast is clear - that maybe, this was as far as things had to go. This was what the magic was compelling you to do, or at the very least - it was close enough. You fulfilled its wishes. Surely.
But then he pulls out of you, and the second you feel the vacuum of emptiness where his fingers once were, that voice in your head is screeching like some sort of petulant child. It pouts, waggling its non-existent finger in your direction. The demanding bitch. 
Part of you, instinctually, realizes that this is just the beginning - that you’re simply at the edge of the shore watching the tides recede while a devastating wave builds somewhere in the distance. 
“What is it? Does it still hurt?” Astarion asks, breaking the silence, and you realize that no, it doesn’t. Not like before, at least. 
You shake your head.
“Good. I’d wager that means this is working.” He smiles triumphantly, working the laces of his own clothes, and ridding himself of the final layers between you, revealing an intricate network of muscle beneath. For a man who’d supposedly been starved for the last two centuries, he certainly doesn’t look the part.
Astarion nudges your legs apart with his thigh, then settles between your knees, dragging the head of his cock between your folds. He hums in approval, admiring the sight as he coats himself in your slick. It practically drools out of you.
There’s no resistance when he dips himself into your entrance. 
His eyes scan over your face, searching for any discomfort, but all he finds is need. 
So, he presses in further. 
“Shit, you -” 
He hisses, sucking in a sharp breath as he bottoms out, then takes a moment, eyes pinched shut, collecting himself. 
He slides out, just an inch or so, before plunging back in, buried as deeply as he can reach. It’s so damn easy, the sinfully wet mess you’ve left all over his cock allowing him to glide in and out, tilting his hips with each thrust.
The stretch of him is perfect, like you were made for this - made to take him. His length rubbing and dragging against your walls acts like a balm, relaxing your body as you swallow and grip him in scorching heat. 
He grabs one of your thighs, pressing it into your chest - the new angle allowing him to sink even deeper into your core.
It isn’t long before you’re begging him for more, digging your heels into the curve of his back.
Astarion starts pounding into you - a new, brutal pace spurred on by your encouragement and the wet, filthy slap of his skin against yours. The sounds reverberate off the canvas of your tent, blending with your choked sobs. You just know your companions are going to have something to say about this in the morning, but you honestly can’t bring yourself to care. 
The only thing that matters now is the man above you - his nails digging into the flesh of your ass, whispering how good you feel. How well you’re taking him, “Like you were made for this - for me.” His grunts are like music to your ears, drowning out all other thoughts as his chest vibrates against your own.
It’s all too much. 
Your orgasm sneaks up on you before you have a chance to warn him, but he feels the way you flutter around his cock and acts on instinct - snaking his fingers between your bodies and rubbing your clit in quick circles. 
You throw your head back with a cry, shaking beneath him, and grip him like a vice as you come. The force of it slams into you, hot and devastating, tightening every muscle within its wake. You wind your limbs tightly around the hard planes of Astarion’s body as he rolls his hips into you, slow and deep. 
You can feel him twitching inside you, his rhythm suddenly stuttering with each thrust. Something tells you he’d come now, if you’d allow him.
But where?
'Where else?'
The very idea of him not spilling every drop he has inside of you disturbs you nearly to the point of panic, and with that, you finally understand what this damned succubus has been demanding of you this entire time.
“Astarion, please. I need you.” 
“Where?” he asks, voice muffled, panting hot and open-mouthed against the swell of your shoulder.
“Inside,” you beg, “Please. Please -  It’s alright.” 
He shudders, surging up into you one last time with a strangled grunt. Holding onto your hips, he pulses within you, the warmth of his release filling you to the brim, until a thick white ring of come forms at the base of his length. You can’t help but clench around him, moving to match his previous pace and trying desperately to wring as much out of him as you can, until it begins to seep out onto the sheets beneath you.
It isn’t until he stills inside of you that you release your hold on him. The two of you take a minute to collect yourselves, waiting for your heart to settle and listening to Astarion’s ragged breaths. 
He lifts his weight off of you with a grunt, settling back on his knees. 
“That was - agh,” he shivers as he pulls out of you. You don’t even want to look at the mess.
“I’m going to have to burn these sheets, aren’t I?” you ask, sitting up on your shoulders.
He throws his head back with a genuine, hearty laugh, and cards his fingers through his dampened hair. 
This is the most relaxed you think you’ve ever seen him - not a scowl line in sight. He rolls his shoulders, and sighs at the subsequent pop before turning his focus back on you.
“I’ll have you know,” Astarion muses, “I’ve done this more times than I can count— but this, my dear,” he chuckles, “This was one for the books.”
“So, was sleeping with me everything you could have possibly imagined?” It’s an obvious joke, given your tone. An offer to squash any chance of this happening again, should he wish to. An exit. 
He hums playfully. “Well, next time I think I’d prefer the subtle influence of wine over a mind-altering aphrodisiac, if it's all the same to you.”
There’s a beat of silence. 
Did he just offer to do this again? Well, not exactly, but -
“And how are you feeling?” Astarion asks. 
Better, is the honest answer. Slightly confused and deeply embarrassed, but better. 
The apologies you’ll have to make after the night’s over seem endless, both to him and to Shadowheart for all the trouble you caused. Not to mention the others, who’ve probably had the sound of your squealing burned into their memories forever. The idea of it is daunting.
“Because if you’re still reeling from any nasty, lingering effects,” he continues, “I’m sure I could be… persuaded to help again.”
Oh.
Hm.
“Well, now that you mention it…”
-
Tag List (sorry if I missed anyone! I only added you if you explicitly asked to be tagged): @daedriclys @captain039 @sushiumex @sugasweettea @marauders-moon @starlightelegy @ablxssm @the-lake-is-calling
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dawn-in-neocity · 1 year
Text
“best friend” (™️) nct dream
(that is your man, you’re just in denial)
mark
y’all are only missing the relationship title at this point. you’re always the first to hear his new music. he values your opinion so much. loves lending you hoodies and jackets because when you return them they smell like you. tells you how cute you are 100 times a day. boops your nose and pinches your chin. sends you 360s of his fresh haircuts. shows up to all your events (sports, work events, art, fundraisers, anything you do). makes pinky promises with you.
renjun
you two slowly move into more than friends territory. brings you flowers “for your room”. picks up your vocab without realizing it. reserves his gentlest speaking voice for you only. listens intently to anything and everything you have to say. you two do road-trips and mini getaways all the time. vents to you. creates the perfect bite from his meal for you to try whenever you’re eating together. forehead kisses!!! will be the one to initiate the “what are we” conversation.
jeno
he’s simply your jeno and you do not wish to elaborate. his arm is always draped over the back of your seat. you’re together so often that his friends are confused when you’re NOT at his place. slips up and calls you babe (and keeps at it since you don’t seem to mind). you two are always in a corner laughing it UP about something. y’all dressed up as harley quinn and the joker for halloween. ALWAYS ties your shoelaces for you no matter where you are.
haechan
that’s just your bf i hate to break it to you. posts soft launch-esque pics of you two on his story. everyone thinks you’re dating. teases you by poking his finger into your side. why are you standing so close to each other? his hair is touching your forehead? move? plays with your fingers. named the stuffed animal you won him and now deems it your love child. places your legs on top of his when you sit beside each other. texts you “this made me think of you” at least 4x a week.
jaemin
he would marry you tomorrow if you agreed. makes it clear that it’s you or no one else for him. greets you with a veryyy friendly kiss on the cheek. 0 chill when it comes to pda. got you a really nice gift for valentine’s day. tells you he’s in love with you daily, just in other words. spam comments on your posts. SO flirty. blows kisses and winks at you type of flirty. STARES; like heart shaped pupils, dopey smile staring. “it’s late, you should just sleep over :)”.
chenle
has known you forever and has basically been your bf forever. regularly texts your mother. brings you to all his family events. affectionately bites you. holds your face in his hands and squishes your cheeks together. casually drops the most heartwarming compliments ever. never corrects people when they refer to you as his s/o. places your hand on his arm when you guys walk together. gets close to your face and pulls away when you’re about to kiss. dies when you do it back.
jisung
you two have never been just friends tbh. will bail on plans just to stay in and watch netflix with you. calls you a version/nickname of your name only he uses. asks you for head scratches when he’s tired. picks up on your moods so easily like how??? actively keeps up with all your school/work tea. always brings you a little treat when he comes to see you. forgets you’re meant to be low-key when he drinks and gets very… loving. y’all are always falling asleep on facetime.
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000-pawz · 4 months
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i don't want us to just be friends! (bnd) ˚ · .
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bnd when they have a crush , ot6 headcanons , fluff , pining , nonidol au
more under the cut!
a/n: requested here and here! eeek tysm <3 i also subtly brought their charts into play here too (you guys already know how i roll) >3<
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sungho ˚ ⋆。˚
𐙚₊˚ when sungho has a crush on you, he literally wants to become your superman >< he'll carry your backpack across campus for you, lends you his (very neat) notes if you miss a day in class, and brings you food to your dorm room if you're sick </3 he just wants to do whatever he can to help you
𐙚₊˚ loves studying with you!!! his favorite part is when you go quiet when you're really focused and he can just watch your cute concentrated face <3 he'll nudge you from under the desk when it's time to take a break and convince you to go with him to get food!!! he wants to make sure that you're taking care of yourself always
𐙚₊˚ he's not the type to initiate affection first between you guys, so when you do it, he turns into an absolute mess. if your head falls onto his shoulder while you're laughing, he'll probably act cool on the outside, but on the inside, he's literally screaming, running laps!!!
𐙚₊˚ or if you grab his hand to walk through a crowd together without losing each other, he'll try to suppress his smile as best he can, but ultimately fails because??? your hand fits perfectly in his???? hello????
𐙚₊˚ sungho becomes really cute and soft around you. he shyly smiles when you wave to him across campus!!! or if you're hanging out alone watching a movie, he'll share his blanket with you and shuffle up to your side so your legs are pressing against each other's (and yes it's an excuse to be closer to you!!!)
𐙚₊˚ gets pretty protective over you. if you fall and scrape your knee, he's carrying you to the nurse asap (even if it's just a little cut :<). better yet, he'll take care of you himself, treating you so gently as he bandages up your wound and tells you to be more careful cause you could've gotten really hurt!!
𐙚₊˚ really playful with you! probably lightly teases you about your cute habits, does bunny ears above your head when you take a selfie, pretends to bite you when you tease him back ^___^ just like a giant kitty
𐙚₊˚ sungho is not one to keep secrets and he's pretty straightforward, so i see him confessing to you first >< he'll probably make it really intimate, like bringing you flowers and then taking you to a picnic in the field </3 there are literal sparkles in his eyes when he watches the way the sun hits your skin! just something super sappy where it can just be the two of you and he can confess all of his honest feelings with no interruptions!!!
˚ ⋆。˚ riwoo
𐙚₊˚ riwoo is incredibly shy around his crush!!! he'll probably be the most physically awkward out of all of them lol like if he has to partner up with his crush for a conversation, he'll literally die a little on the inside because he gets so flustered around you, he can barely speak!!!
𐙚₊˚ he definitely keeps his crush on you to himself. for one, he wants to be able to admire you from afar and he's simply happy with just liking you! and for two, he doesn't want his friends to embarrass him around you ><
𐙚₊˚ probably screams into his pillow whenever you text him first >3< or smiles behind his hand because you are texting him!!! he replies back super fast too because he doesn't want you to think he's uninterested!!!
𐙚₊˚ he'll always try his best to make you smile around him, even if it involves him making a fool of himself!!! if you're in the same room, he'll text you something funny and wait to see your reaction from across the room ^___^
𐙚₊˚ worries about you so much :C if you seem extra tired in class, he'll check up on you, asking you if you need anything!!! he'll sneak snacks into your bag, switch seats with you if you get the wobbly chair, and he's just overall very attentive!!! if you don't show up for class out of the blue, he's texting you right away to make sure everything is okay and if you need him to bring you anything!!! <3
𐙚₊˚ very adaptable to you. if you're grabbing lunch together and you mention a specific menu you like, he's ordering the same thing! and if you're studying together in his dorm and you say you're hot, he'll immediately turn on the air conditioning (even if he's shivering </3) he always prioritizes your comfort
𐙚₊˚ loves to have long and deep conversations with you. enjoyes hearing about your plans for the future, and your goals and aspirations!!! he's all for learning what makes you tick so he can cater to your needs better <3 he just loves learning about you as a person because you are so interesting to him and you have a way of scratching his brain just right
𐙚₊˚ riwoo would be so so so nervous to confess. he'd run over what he wants to say multiple times to himself before you even show up to the park he's meeting you at. and when you finally do show up, all of his effort goes straight out of the window and he forgets everything he wanted to say </3 so he just says "y/n. i like you." and you giggle a bit because you already know!!! you were just waiting for him to say something >< and when you tell him so, riwoo gets so blushy and shy before asking if he can take you out tomorrow!! officially :3
jaehyun ˚ ⋆。˚
𐙚₊˚ everyone will already know he has a crush on you before he even knows!!! he finds a way to mention you in every conversation and starts smiling like an idiot whenever someone says your name <3
𐙚₊˚ becomes your very own puppy ^___^ if you weren't already friends before jaehyun starts liking you, then you are now! he'll ask to be your partner whenever he gets the chance, gets excited for you when you share good news with him, does whatever you ask of him
𐙚₊˚ like if you mention you want a certain drink from the store, jaehyun is up and out of his seat in the blink of an eye!!! or if you say that your feet hurt from walking around all day, he'll give you a piggy back ride home!!!
𐙚₊˚ he invites you out to everything like "hey y/n, did you want to go to this party with me tonight", or "hey y/n, are you busy later? maybe we can go to the carnival together", or even "hey y/n, can you come with me to buy toothpaste please"
𐙚₊˚ intense eye contact whenever you have something to say. he does that thing where he cocks his head at you with gentle eyes and nods along to whatever you're saying, reacting to everything and giving you little smiles here and there <3
𐙚₊˚ becomes the loudest, goofiest person ever around you. he's cracking jokes left and right, sharing stories that he knows will entertain you, etc. he literally just goes on autopilot freak mode because he's driven by pure impulse when you're around ><
𐙚₊˚ once you guys are comfortable around each other, he gets pretty touchy!!! he'll give you tight hugs whenever he greets you, brushes hair out of your face if you're focused on your work, gives you random fistbumps and high fives just for an excuse to touch you ><
𐙚₊˚ jaehyun's confession would be so out of the blue, he even surprises himself. he'll be walking you back home after a late-night study session and he'll just get such a big rush of emotion when he looks at you in the moonlight and he'll just blurt out that he likes you!!! he'll quickly cover his mouth with wide eyes and be like "did i say that out loud...?" and you just laugh at him because he's so cute before confessing that you like him too <3
˚ ⋆。˚ taesan
𐙚₊˚ if taesan has a crush on you, you might think that he simply doesn't like you >< he'll avoid eye contact at all cost, walk in the opposite direction if he hears that you're coming, ducks away if you enter the room. he gets so overwhelmed everytime he sees you, his fight or flight kicks in lol
𐙚₊˚ perks up if he ever hears your name mentioned in public. like he'll be totally locked in on his computer or something and as soon as he hears your name in a passing conversation, he'll sit up straighter and look around to see if you're nearby >< he might even listen in on someone's conversation just to hear what they're saying about you
𐙚₊˚ he stresses out so much about whether or not to speak to you first if you're not already friends. he'll pace his room, ask his friends if you're seeing anyone, runs over every possible outcome of him talking to you (and the only thing he's trying to do is introduce himself </3)
𐙚₊˚ when he finally does build up the courage to talk to you, he's a stuttering mess!!! it already took him 32978 hours to even convince himself to finally talk to you, and when he does, he finds himself tripping over his words a lot and stumbling through greetings </3
𐙚₊˚ taesan is the type to buy you your favorite drink from the cafe and then "run" into you and say "hey, uh i just had an extra one of these." and then he quickly gives it to you before running away and you're just like he is so cute (because it's so obvious that he likes you)
𐙚₊˚ once you guys get closer, speaking to you would be like a second nature to him!!! he just needs to break out of his shell a bit >< he'll ask you to meet him at the bench outside of your dorm/house at like 2 am just so you guys can talk alone (and if he "accidentally" had an extra hoodie in his backpack for when you start to get cold, no he didn't >3<)
𐙚₊˚ i said it before and i'll say it again! taesan loves loves loves sharing music with you. he'll make you multiple playlists (all with subtle meanings and confessions hidden in them) and send them to you!!! he might actually malfunction if you do the same as well (and he will read into every lyric of every song you send)
𐙚₊˚ he'd confess when you guys are at a record store together, checking out vinyl. he'll pick a song that perfectly captures everything he wants to say that he can't put into words, and you just look so pretty flicking through all of the albums, and he knows this is his chance!!! so he puts the vinyl on the record player and calls you over to place the headphones over your ears and as you listen, you realize what's he's trying to say and you give him the biggest hug ever that makes him stumble back a bit with a big smile, wrapping himself up in you <3
leehan ˚ ⋆。˚
𐙚₊˚ definitely the type to stare at you from across the room with that soft gaze, just watching you exist. observing which hand you write with, your little quirks and habits, the clothes you like to wear. just learning about you from afar. he might even scroll through your social media too :<
𐙚₊˚ his line from serenade when he's like "hey, the weather is nice. want to go for a walk?"!!! he'll stroll with you quietly, making small talk, asking you how your classes are going, and he gets really giggly if your hands accidentally brush each other's <3
𐙚₊˚ leehan will find any way to accommodate you! if you mumble that your head hurts in class, he'll ask the professor to dim the lights for you! and if you're cold, he'll insist you take his jacket!!!
𐙚₊˚ if leehan has a crush on you, he will mentally act like he's married >< if someone else tries to confess to him, he'll respectfully reject them because he only has eyes for you!!!
𐙚₊˚ he laughs at all of your jokes, even if they are terrible >< it's not even forced laughter though!!! he genuinely finds you so endearing that everything you do is cute to him
𐙚₊˚ speaking of cute!!! he calls you cute a lot. you'll do the most mundane thing ever and he'll just watch you with a tiny smile, thinking that you are the cutest thing to ever exist. he might even say it out loud just to see you get flustered <3
𐙚₊˚ loves when you rant/vent to him!!! he thinks it's so special that you see him as a safe place to go when you're stressed, and he'll do anything to ease that stress. he'll reach over and give your hand an encouraging squeeze, listening intently to everything you say, and give you advice if you ask for it!!!
𐙚₊˚ he would probably confess to you after months, or even years of being friends!!! when you guys are alone, probably having a midnight talk about anything and everything when he goes "y/n. i really like you." and it'll catch you so off guard and get you so flustered, but he just couldn't wait any longer!!! and when you breathlessly confess that you like him back, he'll pull you into the tightest hug ever with an airy laugh, relieved that everything worked out <3
˚ ⋆。˚ woonhak
𐙚₊˚ he's in lalaland before he even strikes up conversation with you </3 woonhak will literally daydream about you all the time, zoning out in class just thinking about you for hours!!! he'll probably even imagine scenarios of you guys together to help him fall asleep at night lol
𐙚₊˚ he so obviously likes you, but for him to actually tell you is a whole different story. he just likes you so so so much and he's really scared of his feelings being rejected, so he forces himself to believe that he's okay with just being friends with you <3 he thinks that having you like this is better than not having you at all
𐙚₊˚ that doesn't mean he doesn't show you he likes you though! you are his go-to person for everything. like if he got a new shirt, he's asking you if you think it looks okay (and if you show any hint of disliking it, he's never wearing that shirt again because your opinion is the only one that matters)
𐙚₊˚ facetimes 24/7!!! he'll call you whenever he's bored and you guys will just carry on with your own lives while still on facetime, occasionally falling into conversation before going about your day again
𐙚₊˚ like he'll literally call you just so he can brush his teeth while watching you study! or if he's walking to the store, he'll facetime you to show you how great the weather is (and he'll convince you to meet him at the park so you can have ice cream together <3)
𐙚₊˚ woonhak will be at your side as soon as you need him, no questions asked. if he calls you and can hear in your voice that you were crying, he's rushing over to you asap!! his shoelaces won't even be tied and his jacket will be inside out because he was trying to get to you so fast </3 immediately pulls you into a hug and reassures you that you're never alone as long as he's here
𐙚₊˚ if you ever compliment him, his entire year will be made. i imagine him doing that thing where he smiles so wide, his eyes bunch up and his shoulder reach his ears and he's just a giant ray of sunshine ^___^ he won't waste any time complimenting you back either!!!
𐙚₊˚ he'd confess to you by making you a big basket of gifts n stuff, topped off with a handwritten letter </3. it'll be full of plushies, your favorite snacks, pictures you guys took together in photobooths, cute stickers that he'd think you like, random stuff in your favorite color ^___^ his handwriting will be messy and you can see that he wrote and erased many times, just trying to find the right words to say!!! it's all so personal, sweet, and thoughtful <333
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reblogs are greatly appreciated! thank u...<3
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mavrintarou · 10 months
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[Daddies in Decembers] Sakusa Kiyoomi
I'm 4 days into December but thought, I should dedicate this month to the daddies being dads lol. This was not supposed to be this long, I can't guarantee that the other characters will have something this lengthy. Enjoy~
Warning: fluffy and dreamy Omi, Omi who knows how to waltz, Omi who is a beast in bed (we all know that though) smut . You met Kiyoomi a few months ago after you found out he was going to be your partner for your friend’s Bridgerton theme wedding. Your first impression of this man was that he was cold and unapproachable. He was always standing at a distance from everyone else and kept to himself.
“It’s normal, that’s Kiyoomi.” Hinako text you. She admitted that out of all the other bridesmaids, you were the best fit for Kiyoomi because of his attitude.
Engaging with people was usually a breeze for you, even when it came to strangers. However, Sakusa Kiyoomi was on another level. Despite your best efforts to connect with him for the sake of the wedding, he remained unyielding. His piercing glares suggested annoyance, and he rarely cracked a smile or engaged in conversation. Moreover, his face was often half-covered underneath a mask 99% of the time. Whenever you tried to start a conversation with him, he would only respond with a simple answer.
You immediately adjusted to his behavior and only engaged in a conversation when needed.
The exact moment you started feeling drawn to Kiyoomi was unclear. Hinako and Youta’s wedding required great preparation. The ten bridesmaid and their groomsmen were expected to learn how to waltz and participate in three of the dances that were part of the reception program.
Your initial waltz class with Kiyoomi was anxiety-inducing. Aware of his strong aversion to germs, you were uncertain about how he would react to holding your hand. Prior to the class, you took extra precautions by washing your hands three times.
It was the first occasion you had witnessed Kiyoomi in casual attire, excluding his sport outfits. Following the instructor’s guidance, he took your hand and encircled his other arm around your waist.
“Let me know if my hand positioning makes you feel uncomfortable,” he mumbled. You assured him he was fine.
Kiyoomi surprisingly showed great skills in waltzing. He picked up the steps and movements immediately and was praised by the instructor for how gracefully his body moved.
“Relax and just follow me,” Kiyoomi commanded softly after you struggled to follow the tune and his steps, stepping on his toes as a result. You looked up and your eyes nearly bulged when he said that he had his mask pulled down below his chin, giving you a full view of his face. “I’ll go at your pace.”
Just like that, two were the first pair to nail the first dance.
Your relationship began to flourish since that day.
You both dedicated extra time outside of dance class for practice, and in the private moments shared between just the two of you, a different side of him emerged – a soft side.
He was gradually growing at ease in your presence, evident in the way he would swiftly discard his mask as soon as he was around you.
“Closer,” Kiyoomi whispered, pulling you right against his body. “Remember, the instructor said we must be more intimate?”
“Waltzing should be intimate, I know you guys aren’t romantic partners but you all should try to put more emotions into it,” said the instructor at their last class.
Nodding your head, you relaxed and tried not to blush even more at how close you two were. You shift your gaze to his coffee table that’s pushed against the wall, anything to distract you from staring at his gorgeous face. The dance studio was closed for cleaning and neither of you knew until you arrived only to be disappointed at the sign on the door.
You were on the verge of suggesting that you guys could reconnect again in a few days, given your upcoming busy schedule with work over the next two days.
“You comfortable… coming to my place? It is nearby.”
You had to refrain from smiling, seeing how he couldn’t look at you in the eyes and his ears were bloodshot red.
“Sure,” you gesture, “lead the way.”
Each dance and song used to be a drag to you, but recently, you’ve discovered that you’re getting lost in the music and the steps, completely immersed in the dance. Before you realize it, you and Kiyoomi find yourself at the end of the waltz breathing heavily, locked in a gaze, deeply connected through the rhythm.
The moment it began was a blur, but gradually, you both discovered comfort and support in each other’s presence, sharing smiles and laughter as you immersed yourself in the dance.
“We did it,” you grinned, realizing that both of you had mastered the dance steps, reaching a point where mistakes were almost nonexistent. From the very beginning to the end, you and Kiyoomi seamlessly executed the waltz.
You aren’t sure if it was a mistake to look into Kiyoomi’s eyes but you did and found yourself lost in his. Your fingers itched to thread through his curls, brush your thumb against the two beauty marks on his forehead.
“Y/n,” he exhaled deeply. You realize it wasn’t due to the dance, as you had already caught your breath.
“… yes?”
His eyes shift lower, you feel them shift to your lips. “Can I – may I… kiss you?” Before you could answer, he quickly withdrew from you, turning away. “I’m sorry,” he apologized, “that was stupid of me to ask.”
You closed the distance and tugged his sleeve to turn him around. He looked down at you with a frown and a frustrated expression. You ignored it all but what you couldn’t ignore was realizing how tall he was compared to you at that exact moment.
Looking around, his coffee table was right beside you. Without much thought, you stepped on the table, gripped the collar of his t-shirt, and pulled him towards you before pressing your lips against his.
It was a simple innocent kiss.
Until you were about to pull away but a hand wrapped behind your head, and Kiyoomi’s lips moved over yours in a hungry and deprived kiss.
“Mhmm,” you moaned, hands cupping his face. You move your mouth with his, eagerly meeting his kiss.
You both pulled away, breathless, more breathless than when you two waltzed together.
You pressed your forehead against him, realizing with you standing on his coffee table, you were slightly taller than him.
“S – sorry,” he murmured.
“For what?”
“Kissing you.”
“I kissed you,” you corrected, frowning.
“And then I kissed you.”
“But I’m not sorry?” You retort.
.
Everything shifted from the moment the kiss occurred. In the presence of others, Kiyoomi remained close, yet he retained his stoic expression, and nobody else seemed to discern the shift between the two of you. You found peace in subtle moments, such as when his hand gently brushed against yours or his pinky subtly intertwined with yours – a private exchange that went unnoticed by everyone else.
The wedding came around and before you knew it, it was the real dance.
You faced Kiyoomi, and despite having walked down the aisle alongside him earlier, you found it challenging to fully comprehend how handsome he appeared with his curls styled to the side, dressed in a sharp black suit.
Throughout the wedding, neither of you had the chance to share a moment together, let alone exchange a simple, routine kiss. Every time you two finally found a moment to gaze at each other for longer than three seconds, one of you would inevitably be pulled away for something else.
“You look stunning,” he whispered the moment you two closed the distance and were pressed against one another.
“You look dashing,” you smiled, following his steps.
You twirled around, your back pressed against his chest as you mirrored his steps. Your heart quickened as his hand firmly pressed against your belly instead of his usual place on your waist.
Kiyoomi nudges your head, making you tilt your head, your eyes closing in response as you feel the music and the dance. You felt his nose graze against your ear. In a quiet, low voice, he murmured, “I was starting to lose my patience because I couldn’t catch a second with you.” With that, he spun you back around, guiding the dance with grace. “I just want to be with you.”
For a few seconds, the others around you blurred and you could no longer hear the music. You stared deeply into Kiyoomi’s eyes repeating the words he just said.
In recent nights, you’ve found yourself foolishly attempting to unravel the sexual tension lingering between the two of you. Did he desire it as well, or were you the only one harboring such delusions? These thoughts began to weigh on you, leading to a sense of melancholy as you pondered what would become of your connection once the wedding concluded. You wouldn’t have an excuse to see him anymore.
Shooting your shot, you asked, “do you want to come back to my room tonight?”
Did he understand the hidden meaning behind your question?
What if he shot you down?
He blinked at you as if trying to comprehend what you just asked him.
Your ears began ringing and you felt embarrassed.
“Can we go now?” he asked shyly.
.
“Ahh,” you moaned, back arching as Kiyoomi pounded you from behind. You lost track of time, let alone how many orgasms he has squeezed out of you. “Ki – yomi… Kiyoomi – wait… slow down… ple – please…”
You two made it back to your room and all your clothes were discarded, mixing amongst each other and becoming a trail that led to the bed.
The headboard thumps loudly against the wall. It was the reality for you as to how deep and how hard he was pounding into you.
Your arms and knees gave in as your body collapsed onto the bed. That did not stop Kiyoomi and his movement, if anything, he continued and penetrated you deeper.
You were going to die. You are convinced of that.
“Omi… Omi,” you moaned into the pillow, you tried to lift yourself but it was useless. Each time he thrusted, he penetrated so deep into your body sending you over the edge. You were going to cum again.
The bed shook in waves with his thrusts as he neared his own orgasm. Your body bounced and each time you felt his cock deeper into your pussy.
Kiyoomi’s last thrust stilled and you feel him tremble as he came inside the condom.
His groans were cute, you thought to yourself amid the moment.
“What is funny?”
Did you laugh out loud?
You glance over your shoulder, seeing him tower over your back. His weight was supported by his knees and elbow but he remained deep inside of you.
“You’re a beast, Kiyoomi.”
He burst out laughing before rolling you both over. You ended up falling asleep in his arms, warmed and protected through the night.
.
You had worried for nothing as he asked you to be his girlfriend the next morning. He expressed his worry, the same worry as you, about not seeing each other once the wedding was over.
That was when he realized how he felt about you.
“I like you,” he tells you in his husky morning voice that you instantly fell in love with. “You made me feel things I never felt for anyone.”
“Is that why you set out to make sure I wouldn’t be able to walk this morning?”
He chuckles and you tighten your arm around him.
“I like you too,” you tell him after a few minutes of silence.
Kiyoomi tightened his arms around you and rolled you onto your back. “Say it again.”
“I like you,” you repeated.
It was hard for you to believe that this grinning from-ear-to-ear Kiyoomi was the same one you met a few months ago.
You lean up to kiss him, you love these new discoveries about Kiyoomi, his morning voice, his chuckles, and his smiles.
.
They say it takes about a year for you to learn the true nature of someone but some, you find their true nature a lot sooner.
Sakusa Kiyoomi was not who you thought he was.
The icy and solemn man you initially encountered was far from the one currently resting on your lap, arms embracing your waist, his face nestled into your stomach.
“Don’t stop.”
You hummed while gazing down at the large puppy, thinking he had drifted off to sleep.
Instead of repeating himself, Kiyoomi grabbed your hand and placed it back on his head, wanting you to continue to keep petting him and run your fingers through his curls.
You giggle and continue to keep massaging his scalp, knowing he needs it after a long day of practice and dealing with his teammates.
Your husband of a month and soon-to-be daddy had become even clingier after the life-changing events of your wedding and your pregnancy.
He needed to be beside you at all times, even in the mornings when he was tired and you got up to prepare his lunch. He would grumble and cling on to you from behind, chin resting on your shoulder as he watched you. Sometimes in the same position, he would chop up the vegetables while you made his sandwich, all while clinging on to you.
Despite finding it bothersome, you recognized that his love language centered around physical touch, only with you, of course. You endured his behavior because of your affection for him.
. . .
E/n: I try to write about other characters too and not just my usual Omi and Rin.
@queenelleee @mfreedomstuff @erintaro @callmeraider @chaotic-fangirl-blog @wolffmaiden @cloud-lyy
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