#i think writing so much has contributed to this as well tbh.. like i've just began to Appreciate the science of storytelling

[magickedhat]

i can either be normal abt wren’s parents OR create an entire webcomic series abt them. guess which one im inevitably falling into

[my-mind-is-incognito]

Wanna Duet? (Hugh Jackman x Reader)

summary: you're an interviewer sitting down with 2 of the hottest celebrities, both fresh off their latest movie. during the interview, one of them feels the need to shake up the script a bit

warnings: None that I can think of, other than intense yearning for an unattainable man (tbh isn't that why we read and write these sort of things anyway?)

author's note: Um, hi. It's been a couple of years since I've contributed to this site and this particular blog, other than reblogging other people's much more notable work. But the new deadpool movie, as well as Hugh Jackman, has literally got me hostage by the ovaries and I just needed to put this random fantasy into words and put it out there into the world. Please be gentle. I haven't written anything in years and it is so weird to me now.

When you call my name

It’s like a little prayer

I’m down on my knees

I wanna take you there

In the midnight hour

I can feel your power

Just like a prayer

I wanna take you there

The lyrics to that familiar song softly tumbled from your lips as you studied the notecards in your hand while your shoulders softly rocked to the beat. You wanted to make sure the questions were etched in your brain; as a journalist tasked with interviewing celebrities, you needed to maintain your A-game when it came to these video shoots with the Hollywood elite. You couldn’t afford to stumble over your words or, even worse, have an awkward silence creep into the conversation. 

A knock at the door brought you out of your reverie, and Maggie, the producer, poked her head in. “They just arrived,” she informed you. “Ten minutes.”

You flashed her a thumbs up and got out of your seat to loosen your stiff muscles and fight the enormous grin spreading across your face. Today’s scheduled shoot was one you were particularly looking forward to: a simple sit down interview with two of the hottest stars, fresh off the premiere of one of the most anticipated movies of 2024. Somewhere on the premises, Hugh Jackman and Ryan Reynolds were waiting to speak to you, and your Marvel-loving heart was hammering in your chest in anticipation. The butterflies were certainly in hyperactive manic mode today. 

Maggie studied you with a laugh. “Excited, are we?”

“Aren’t you? We’re about to meet Deadpool and Wolverine!” You took a few deep breaths, channeling your professional side. But soon, the facade fell and you were grinning like a jittery idiot. ”How are they? Are they as ridiculously gorgeous in person?”

Maggie grinned. “Yes, plus super nice. Definitely making the top 10 nicest guests list. Hurry up and get out there.” She then left and shut the door behind her.

Biting back the urge to squeal, you took a few composing breaths and willed your heart to stop racing like a schoolgirl in love. Picking up your phone, you started scrolling your phone for a song. Singing was always a typical warm-up exercise for you; it helped you loosen up and provided an outlet for your nervous energy. Showtunes were usually your go-to songs, and you had a particular soundtrack stuck in your head for the past few weeks. 

“Ladies and gents, this is the moment you’ve waited for,” you sang softly, shimmying your hips to the beat of the song. “Been searching in the dark, your sweat soaking through the floor.”  Another hip wiggle on beat as you spun on your heel and held out a dramatic fist in the air. “And buried in your bones, there’s an ache that you can’t ignore, taking your breath, stealing your mind, and all that was real is left behind…

Don’t fight it’s coming for you, runnin’ at ya

It’s only this moment, don’t care what comes after

Your fever dream, can’t you see it gettin’ closer?

just surrender cuz you feel the feeling takin’ over

It’s fire, it’s freedom, it’s flooding open

It’s a preacher in the pulpit and your blind devotion

There’s something breaking at the brick of every wall it’s holding

All that you know

So tell me, do you wanna go?

Where it’s covered in all the colored lights

Where the runaways are running the night

Impossible comes tre, it’s taking over you

Oh, this is the greatest show!

We light it up, we won’t come down

And the sun can’t stop us now

Impossible comes true, it’s taking over you

Oh, this is the greatest show!”

You blew out one more calming breath and grinned with confidence before striding out the door. Time to get to work.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“So I’m sitting there, my brain melting in my skull from all these fucking hot wings, and the first sentence out of my mouth is ‘I CHEAT AT WORDLE!’”

You and Hugh burst out into laughter as Ryan recounted his and Hugh’s recent experience on Hot Ones. As expected, the interview was going without a hitch. Both men were excellent subjects, genuinely enjoying the process and providing laughs amongst the crew in between the Q+A. Their bestie banter and overall chemistry was so contagious that it brought everyone at ease. And also as expected, both men gave you the urge to subtly fan yourself with your notecards. While both had the leading man looks, Ryan had a dry wit and a delivery that was deadpan and entirely on point, never failing to get a laugh from everyone in the room. Meanwhile, Hugh had a megawatt smile and an Aussie timber in his voice that had you shivering in your chair, and his laughter was as warm and pure as sunshine itself.

“So, Hugh, you’ve mentioned how you were still doing Music Man when you were cast to return as Wolverine. Did the mental and physical preparation for this role clash with your preparations for your Music Man performances?”

Hugh chuckled. “It’s funny you mentioned that, because I had actually lost a bit of weight while doing Music Man. I mean, it’s eight shows a week and each show is a cardio workout like nothing else! So I had to start increasing my calories and, you know, pumping iron in between shows and it got to the point where I actually split my pants onstage during a show!”

You gasped while Ryan just shook his head and laughed. “Yes, the legendary Jackman ass returned, as jacked as ever!” Ryan snarked, which had Hugh guffawing. “Oh, easy there, buddy. No need to break a hip on top of that.”

You futilely hid your laughs behind your notecards, genuinely enjoying this experience. “Well, guys, this has been an absolute pleasure. As a Marvel fan myself, this movie has been long awaited and completely worth it. Any parting words you’d like to leave the audience before we sign off?”

”Actually,” Ryan suddenly interjected, shooting an offhanded smirk at Hugh, “I had a question for you.”

Well, that was unexpected. “Wait, really? For me?” you asked, confused. 

”Yeah, betcha didn’t see this coming, but yes, the tables have in fact been turned. The interviewee is now the interviewer.” Ryan crossed his legs and placed his hands on his lap, smiling mischievously. “See, I happened to be skittering around backstage, and whilst—“

”Whilst?”

”Don’t interrupt me when I’m talking, Hugh Bear. It’s very rude. Yes, whilst skittering back there, I happened to pick up on some backstage karaoke from a certain interviewer.”

Your eyes widened and you hid your gaping mouth behind your hand. “Oh God.”

“Do you deny it?”

“You heard that?!”

Ryan pointed an accusatory finger at you. “Don’t your DARE hide that angelic voice from us, ma’am!”

Hugh switched his focus between you and Ryan. “Wait, did I miss something? What’s happening?”

”Dude, get this. I heard her singing Greatest Showman in the back and she sounds amazing!” Ryan nudged Hugh before holding out a hand to you reassuringly while you continued to gape. 

“Is that right?” Hugh inquired, interest piqued.

You laughed nervously, shielding your face in your hands. In the back of your mind, you wondered if your makeup was good enough to hide the flush spreading across your face. “Oh my god, this is so embarrassing.” 

“Please don’t confuse my enthusiasm for mockery!” Ryan was quick to say, holding out a reassuring hand. “Honestly, I had chills hearing you. Your voice is gorgeous! And clearly you have excellent music tastes due to your song choices. Seriously, I loved it!” Ryan gushed. “My question is, where did you learn to sing? Like, I’m literally jealous because out of the three of us sitting here, I have no musical talent whatsoever, and my singing usually results in children crying. But yours just sounds so good!”

”I wanna hear her sing now,” Hugh remarked cheerfully. “High praise from Ryan is definitely a good voucher.”

“Oooh, that would be so great, Hugh. You could audition her, because her choreo needs a little bit of work. Kinda limited, but I’m sure your rusty hips still got enough wiggle in them to teach her something.”

Both men laughed and leaned forward, their attention on you, and you couldn’t help but cower behind your papers and burst into another fit of panicked giggles. “I have no idea what is happening right now,” you remarked shyly.

Ryan got out of his seat and stood beside you. “Audition jitters, I get them all the time. Here, I’ll coach you through it!” He cleared his throat and adopted a more professional tone, gesturing between you and Hugh. “Alright, so you are at your callback audition. The casting director—obviously, that’s me—liked your stuff and now I wanna do a little screen test with our leading man—that’ll be Hugh.” 

At this, Hugh leaned forward and shook your hand warmly. “Hey there, I’m Hugh Jackman. I’ll be doing this scene with ya.”

You shot a quick glance at Maggie, who silently urged you to play along. So you chuckled and firmly shook Hugh’s hand. “Pleasure to be working with you, sir.” He replied with a warm smile that made your stomach somersault.

Ryan clapped his hands. “Alright! We are looking for some chemistry between our two leads. Let’s see, what’s a good duet song?” He eyed you expectedly. “I won’t ask Hugh, because the man is a neverending jukebox of showtunes. Now’s your chance to put a quarter in him and pick a song.”

You fidgeted in your seat, pausing to think before replying, “Okay, if we are going to do this, I just want to get this off my chest. Hugh, I am a HUGE fan, not just of your work as Wolverine, but your musical roles as well.” In response, he patted his heart and mouthed ‘thank you’ while Ryan rolled his eyes and made the yak-yak motion with his hand.

You continued. “So, if we could, and this is something I’ve always wanted to do…could we sing ‘A Million Dreams’ from Greatest Showman together?”

His eyes lit up and he nodded. “Yeah! I’d love that!” 

You practically bounced in your seat, shaking out your hands in pure excitement while a huge grin spread across your face. “Oh my god, I can’t believe this is happening!”

Hugh got out of his chair and gestured for you to do the same, which you did quickly. “Gotta make it like a real audition,” he informed you with a wink that got you giggling.

Ryan scooted his own chair back and sat back in it, much like a director overseeing a scene. “Okay, are we all good? Pay no attention to the multiple cameras looking at you or the lights beaming down at you, mmkay? It’s most likely nothing new for you. And…action!”

Hugh made a big show of clearing his throat a few times. “Sorry, I’m not warmed up,” he said.

“No one cares, Hugh.”

“And there isn’t any music.”

“Still not caring, Hugh.”

“Thanks, Ryan.”

With the rest of the crew laughing, Hugh finally took your hand in his and, gazing into your eyes, began to sing:

Every night I lie in bed

The brightest colors fill my head

A million dreams are keeping me awake

I think of what the world could be

A vision of the one I see

A million dreams is all it’s gonna take

Oh, a million dreams for the world we’re gonna make

You were mesmerized by his singing. Listening to him on recording did absolutely no justice for him. Never in a million years (no pun intended) did you think this could be happening to you, that Hugh Jackman could be singing one of your favorite songs directly to you. You forced yourself to focus on your breathing and remember your cue. And when it came, you were more than ready to belt out:

However big, however small

Let me be part of it all

Share your dreams with me

Ryan was flashing you a thumbs up while the rest of the crew were cheering you on. Hugh was grinning ear to ear, clearly enjoying himself.

You may be right, you may be wrong

But say that you’ll bring me along

To the world you see

Hugh nodded encouragingly, joining in:

To the world I close my eyes to see

I close my eyes to see

He got down on one knee, clutching his chest dramatically as he still held your hand.

‘Cause every night I lie in bed

The brightest colors fill my head

You grinned in reply and posed cutely in response.

A million dreams are keeping me awake

A million dreams, a million dreams!

As he shot back up, he spun you around, and the two of you both dramatically sang back to back, harmonizing on the final verse.

I think of what the world could be

A vision of the one I see

A million dreams is all it’s gonna take

A million dreams for the world we’re gonna make

As you held that last note, you felt Hugh wrap his arms around your shoulders. Knowing your role, you smiled and leaned against him.

For the world we’re gonna make

The end of the song was met with thunderous applause from everyone on set, with Ryan being particularly enthusiastic in his clapping. “You got the part!” he exclaimed.

You laughed breathlessly as you and Hugh separated. You clutched your face, grounding yourself from the incredible high you were flying on, all while that silly smile on your face still shone brightly. 

Hugh clapped you on the shoulder. “Very well done!” he remarked. “I’ll be sure to keep you on call as my backup leading lady.”

“Oh my god, stop,” you beamed, still a bit breathless. “Karaoke is one thing, but I dunno about leading lady stuff.”

He smiled and gently kissed your hand. “Don’t sell yourself short,” he replied with a wink.

Maggie caught your eye from behind the camera, signaling you to wrap it up. Remembering your job, you quickly looked at the camera and said, “Uh, Deadpool and Wolverine is out in theaters now! Many thanks to Hugh and Ryan for joining us today!”

“Cut!” Maggie announced.

And thus ended probably THE most exhilarating interview of your entire career!

[scribbling-dragon]

45 and flower husbands (or maybe emberfrost/snowbugs :eyes:) for the ask game!

breath from death

summary:

“Oh, love…” the sheer agony in Scott’s voice is enough to make Tango crack his eyes open, watery from his subsequent coughing fits, tears continuing to bead up as he tries to bring Scott’s shape into focus. When he does, he almost wishes he hadn’t, having to resist the urge to recoil from the way Scott is looking at him.

(ao3 link)

(2,473 words)

hdjsk this was meant to be more angsty than it actually was,, i just made tango into a bit of a loser tbh. but! hope you enjoy the snowbugs (i can't lie the only reason i wrote them is bc i loved the name hdsjhsjk). did i see scott gift tango a heart and go a little silly? yes. yes i did

also! if you liked this and want to send in another request the list of prompts is here! i've got a lotta free time at the moment, so i'll definitely be writing stuff a lot more than i have been recently

“Ooh, Skizz really wasn’t lying, hm?”

Tango glances up at the voice, not even bothering to lean away from the bush he’s made himself a comfy spot against. Or as comfy as he can be when every part of him is in burning pain and agony. But the slight slouch he’s found himself in puts the least amount of pressure on his various injuries and maladies, and so is the most comfortable he can be right now.

“Scott,” he croaks out, wincing a little at how terrible his voice really sounds. He’d been spitting smoke earlier, angry with how much energy it was taking to simply haul himself to his feet. It’s left him with the inside of his mouth covered in ash, and his throat feeling like it’s been rubbed raw. “Good to see you could make it.”

Skizz is somewhere nearby, but not close enough to interrupt if Scott decided he wanted to put him out of his misery right here and now. He’s somewhat caught between being thankful for such a thing, and angry that he couldn’t go on any further.

He’d just be another footnote at the end of a book, another mention; a small aside, make sure to mention the one that almost dies in the most silent and insignificant ways.

He is well aware of his previous contributions to these games. He goes out with barely a sound, and the world carries on without him, continues to spin round and round, maybe a few choosing to mourn him. Be sad over the misfortune of his death, how easily such a thing could have been prevented.

He doesn’t even realise he’s breathing smoke again until Scott coughs, waving a hand in front of his face to waft the smoke away. Tango snaps his jaw shut almost immediately, muttering a quiet “sorry” when Scott continues to cough.

“It’s fine, it’s fine. Rough day?”

“You could say that,” he stretches his back out, wincing as it tugs at the edges of unhealed injuries. A stray branch from within the cherry blossom bush scraping a hot line of agony across his spine. He curls inwards on himself with a hiss of pain, tears beading in his eyes at the sudden sting of all his injuries making their protests known.

The small relief from earlier, afforded to him by other servermates, swayed by Skizz’s plea for a small gift of love, a small act of mercy. A better act of mercy would be to put him out of his misery entirely, he thinks humourlessly.

“Hey, c’mon, you're just making this worse for yourself,” a hand lays over the back of his own hand, slowly encircling it before pulling it away. The movements are done with such delicacy, such gentleness, it’s as though he’s made of an extremely fragile glass. Like he’d break if the hands moved him too fast, that he’d shatter into a thousand pieces.

Maybe he would. He feels about ready to fall apart right now, anyway.

“See,” the person – Scott, it’s still Scott, he’s still here, Tango realises belatedly – breathes, his voice barely above a whisper. “That’s much better. Now, where has your teammate gotten off to?”

“He, agh,” he coughs again, a small curl of smoke rolling off his tongue as he hacks, one or both his lungs threatening to make an appearance as he doubles over again, stomach cramping with the force of his coughs. “He went to get some resources, something to better survive the next few hours.”

“He didn’t stay with you?”

“The idiot would have,” he scoffs, laughing slightly. He then has to cough again, appreciating Scott’s gentle stroking over the top of his shoulders. He’s nowhere near as warm as Tango himself is, the fire stoked within his core happily blazing away, despite the disrepair of the rest of his body. “I made him leave. I’m dead either way. My death will be nothing to gasp and cry over, better he’s not around when it does happen.”

“Oh, love…” the sheer agony in Scott’s voice is enough to make Tango crack his eyes open, watery from his subsequent coughing fits, tears continuing to bead up as he tries to bring Scott’s shape into focus.

When he does, he almost wishes he hadn’t, having to resist the urge to recoil from the way Scott is looking at him. His hand is still lying over the top of Tango’s shoulders gently, though no longer stroking to soothe him through a coughing fit.

When Scott had turned up, looking down at him with those gleaming red eyes. Eyes that herald violence, promise it, Tango had willingly accepted his death. Would probably have stretched his arms out and taunted Scott for coming after someone when their guard is so far down that it’s ripped to shreds if even twitching his arms didn’t hurt so badly.

And then he’d just…stood there, crouched in front of him and comforted him as he coughed.

It’s his own fault that his lungs are in such a sorry state, anger over everything about these damn games making his flame burn too hot too quickly. He usually has better control over it, breathes fire for a party trick sometimes, not to clog his lungs with ash. Still, Scott had provided the comfort happily, despite them being on rival teams now, people that should be looking to kill each other. Not make sure that he can breathe and is comfortable and that his ally hasn’t abandoned him.

“Every death is worth shedding at least a tear over,” Scott tells him. His hands have migrated from his shoulders to cradling the back of his neck, now kneeling in front of him instead of crouching. Tango almost wants to tell him that he’ll stain his jeans with grass and mud; they may already be wrecked beyond repair, ripped in ways that aren’t purposeful and stained with old blood, but the thought still crosses his mind. “You’ve built good alliances here, love, there will be several tears shed over your death.”

“And a few oh, poor Tango, what a terrible way to go!’s following behind it,” he snorts without humour, only sparing a moment to be relieved when it doesn’t catapult him into another coughing fit. “The same way it goes every time,” he finishes, slightly bitter. It brings a sour taste to his mouth to think about his previous failures. His previous embarrassments.

He’s jolted from his self-pity party when Scott’s fingers twitch over the nape of his neck, making his efforts to ignore how Scott’s hands are currently resting against the back of his neck null and void. His efforts to ignore how the hands reach far enough round that Scott could easily strangle him. Could simply wrap tight and squeeze the last drops of life from him. Scott would definitely benefit from it, numerous superficial injuries littering his body that he’d probably be relieved to get rid of.

But Scott doesn’t grip to his neck tighter, doesn’t shove him to the ground and crush his windpipe. His hands remain a heavy, almost comforting, weight at the back of his neck. Their faces are close like this, he realises belatedly, the intimacy of such a thing settling over him suddenly and heavily. Like a weighted blanket’s just been chucked on his head. He feels a little unbalanced by such a realisation, even as close to death’s door as he currently is.

It makes an odd feeling wash over him, only increasing as Scott moves his hands, fingers tickling the short furs at the back of his neck. Can feel the way Scott’s thumb brushes over his pulse point – stupid, doesn’t he know that the thumb has a pulse? That you can’t measure someone else’s heartbeat with your thumb, as your own racing heart will interfere?

Scott’s pinky fingers ghost over his jaw as his hands retreat, and tango almost makes a pitiful sound in the back of his throat when he thinks Scott’s pulling away from him.

He’s glad he didn’t (really, really glad) when Scott’s hands still again, settling over his jaw, cradling his face gently between his palms.

He really is quite close now, close enough that Tango can take in the smudged state of his make-up, like Scott’s been rubbing his eyes and smearing it around the corners of his eyes. Or that he’s not reapplied it recently and he’s simply been wearing the same make-up for the past few days.

He’d given up on the stupid pink eyeliner and little hearts he’d draw on his own and the others’ faces ages ago, tired of reapplying it every morning, wasting precious time that could be spent doing other things. More important things.

Scott’s make-up still looks good, though, smudged the way it is.

“I’ve always noticed when you died,” Scott tells him. This close, he can see the pink flecks in Scott’s eyes. They almost match the shirt he chose to wear for this go-around, wanting to fit better with the whole vibe they had going on at the Heart Foundation prior to its burning. “Kinda hard not to, when you're checking your comm every few minutes and hoping it’s not one of your allies that’s just died.”

“Oh,” he says, maybe a little dumbly. So sue him! He’s not sure what to say to a man very close to his face, still looking pretty despite his smudged make-up, when he gets told that he always notices him.

Yeah, some snide part of his brain comments, always notices when you make a fool of yourself and die in the most humiliating way possible.

“Oh,” Scott repeats, snickering a little. It makes his shoulders shake, meaning Tango’s face is wobbling a little because Scott’s still holding his face, cradling him carefully like he’s some delicate thing to be treasured.

Man, he’s glad Skizz hasn’t made a reappearance yet. He’s not sure how he’d explain his current everything to him with a straight face. Skizz would probably laugh at him until he cries.

“What else do you want me to say to that!” he protests, a little embarrassed at his slightly lacklustre response. “Thanks, I notice every time you die too – I'm always dead at that point! I can’t notice.”

“No, no,” Scott shakes his head, brushing one of his thumbs over the paper-thin skin beneath his eye. The motion makes him shiver, something weird, but not unfamiliar or unwelcome, curl down and around his spine. He shudders again. “I’m just teasing you, love, promise.” His eyes twinkle with mirth, “Would you believe me if I told you I came here with kind intentions?”

“Not at all,” Tango says, half-joking. “You’ve only been mean to me so far.”

“Aw, I'm hurt!” Scott cries, eyes crinkling as he grins. “I saw Skizz’s, uh, plea for help on your behalf and thought I might as well pop over and give you a little boost.”

“Oh, really?” He perks up at that. A few people have been by already, each giving him a small boost. To think he was in an even worse state as the sun rose that morning is somewhat horrifying to think about. It’s a miracle he even managed to have a coherent conversation with Skizz as their day began. “Well, c’mon then! Don't leave poor ol’ me waiting.”

“Okay, okay,” Scott laughs again, a little quieter. “God, you tell someone you're about to give them something, and it’s all they can think about.”

“All I can think about is how much pain I'm currently in,” Tango jokes.

He realises that the joke didn’t quite land as he intended when Scott’s face doesn’t continue to crease with smile lines, instead dropping into something sadder. “Well,” he says confidently, “I can fix that real quick for you, love.”

And then Scott’s leaning and Tango’s floundering, because, sure, he’s kissed people before. For definite. Kissed people plenty of times, actually! But he never quite knows what to do with his hands, nevermind the fact that he can barely even lift his hands right now.

Scott seems comfortable taking the initiative, giving him a chaste peck on the lips, warm hands continuing to cradle his face gently, before pulling back just as quickly as he’d moved in.

“There,” he says, sounding satisfied. “All better?”

“I – yeah. Thanks,” he manages. He mentally fist pumps when his voice doesn’t wobble and he doesn’t immediately chase after Scott with significantly less achy limbs than a few moments before. “That’s really appreciated, thank you.”

“Not a problem,” Scott says, wiping a little around his bottom lip, clearing away some of the smudged make-up there. “Always glad to help!” He chirps, then stands. “Well, I’ll be seeing you around, hopefully not at the other end of my sword!”

“Hopefully not,” Tango agrees. Really hopefully not because he’ll probably just stand there like an idiot and think about how soft Scott’s lips are, and the way they’d slotted against his own, and-

The clearing of a throat above him has him blinking his eyes open, squinting a little at the figure silhouetted by the sun.

“See you had a little visitor,” Skizz tells him, sounding far too smug for someone that probably only saw Scott walk away. Tango’s sheltered where he sits, so even if Skizz was on his way back while…all that happened, there’s no way he actually saw anything.

“I- what? Oh, Scott, yeah. He gave me a heart.”

“See he gave you a little something else, too.”

What?

“What?” He asks, sitting up slightly, hissing under his breath as his cracked ribs forcefully remind him that they're still cracked. “What d’you mean?”

“You got a little something,” Skizz says, “around here.”

And gestures around his mouth.

Tango wipes at his lip with his thumb, cringing when it comes away stained with make-up. Make-up that everyone has seen Scott wearing recently.

“Oh, wow, haha,” he laughs, not at all amused. “How’d that get there.”

“How indeed,” Skizz says, obviously already knowing, the dick. “Maybe we should ask the whole server, see if they can help us solve this mystery.”

“No!” Tango throws himself upwards as Skizz goes to retrieve his comm, smacking his hands away frantically. “No, no, I'm sure we can figure this out ourselves.”

“Oh, yeah. I'm sure we can.” Skizz says, and walks off. Still grinning.

Tango collapses back down to the ground, indulging his moment of dramatism even as it aggravates a few minor wounds.

Whatever shitty higher being watches over me now, he pleads, please strike me down before he comes back.

The shitty higher being watching over him decidedly does not strike him down, and Skizz comes back to laugh him again, though he brings a make-up wipe with him…maybe Tango can find it in his heart to forgive him. Eventually.

[apocalypticdemon]

nine people i want to get to know better!!

i was tagged by the lovely @clandestinegardenias!! thank you!

Last Song: I-E-A-I-A-I-O by System of a Down! i've been branching out of my heavy metal rut of the last 6 months, but System of a Down still slaps really hard.

Favorite Color: hmmmm i really like lush jewel tones, so i think i have to go with like a deep burgundy right now, but the green of spring vegetation in full sun is a very, very close second

Currently Watching: well. i'm in the middle of a The Terror rewatch right now (again....) but the literal last thing I just watched was the IndyCar Grand Prix in Laguna Seca Raceway in Monterey, CA. but in terms of new shows, i'm not watching new stuff rn.

Last Movie: Mad God. what a fucking trip that film is. jesus. stop-motion horror film. visually gorgeous. disgusting. it was my second time watching it, and it was again really gross and not super linear and 100% up my alley. it was so bizarre, but i am CAPTIVATED by the music (since there is no dialogue; it's only music and sfx) and i want to write a paper on it so so sososo badly.

Currently Reading: currently juggling Captain Crozier: Last Man Standing, Les Miserables, and The Wager! They're all good in their own respects, but very very different from one another, as well. The Crozier bio is a little bit lighter than I was expecting, The Wager more narrative than I was expecting, and Les Mis thus far has just been slow, but i'm in the early pages for everything but the Crozier biography, so i'm still getting used to them. Also I started Persuasion by Jane Austen last month, but haven't gotten very far yet.

Sweet, Spicy, or Savory? they all have their place, but i have such a bad sweet tooth. it trumps almost everything for me. i love sugar.

Relationship: single! i've been single since like.... my sophomore year of high school? and i'm halfway through my master's now, so it's been.... i think i'll have been single for a decade exactly this year, on my birthday. but also i'm extremely aromantic so. that does contribute to that, lmao

Current Obsession: oh it's definitely The Terror. Very much so. but IndyCar is also a quiet sports obsession of mine and i am starting to get In The Weeds for it this year. i deliberately chose to pay more attention after the 500 this year, but i've been meaning to follow the full season for a few years now, and it's been a blast! really nice to watch tbh. it's fascinating stuff, and one of the only sports i can really, truly sink my mental teeth into. also i have been crocheting like mad recently, bc it keeps me entertained and Makes Things!

Last Googled: tire strategy and regulations in IndyCar races, the differences in those regulations between oval and road courses, and the literal difference in composition between alternate and primary tires. very cool stuff. to me, at least, lmao

Currently Working On: jotting down ideas for the next two terror fics i want to work on/sketching out the plots and adaptations for both of them, getting fully trained at my job, and like 3 separate crochet projects. i have. a very scattered brain. also mentally gearing up for my second year of my master's, which is frightening, considering that i have to Write A Thesis soon lmao

oh lordt i don't know if i have 9 people to tag, but i'll tag a few: @imwritesometimes, @jbloopers, @sweetenby, @silkenbutterfly7 - if any of you want to participate, please do!

[iridescentscarecrow]

self indulgent semi critical stream of consciousness thoughts on p2 & csm's writing style --

re: the comedy point: i do say this a lot but fujimoto uses the same tension for both comedy & horror -- the punchline of a Joke disrupts just as a rupture of tension -> horror occurs. & this is why i appreciate the writing last chapter, personally. the crassness/hilarity to it almost contributes to how i'm reading it. he hates his body/the body becomes a point of comedic objection. this kind of relies on being able to see how this meshing of telling & character overlap: which i find q. compelling re: how sexual trauma works, the way it kind of deprecates, lessens your sense of self. it's a story very lived in & deeply Felt wrt how all its characters are written (the butt of the joke refuses to simply Be that, if it makes sense. kobeni's distress in the family burger chs is hilarious but its also a haunting, empathetic, portrait of corporate/family violence; comedy further built on the hollowness of what the CSM being there/going through This Motion means.)

this for sure won't work for every reader, tbh, & i understand this because it's a fine line to tread between portraying this effectively & it just coming off as insensitive. i'm personally very interested in genres & working within genres|how horror/comedy/character presentations conflict, intersect so i'm enjoying it... but it's true that p2 often feels hollower of a story than p1 & this isn't Bad, per se: i think what fjmt is trying to say is a lot more ambitious, a lot more immersed in technique - that it often takes away from some of the contemplative rawness (which does, by contrast, feature in some of p2's more widely loved chapters) that fills p1. p2's ruptures of tension are more at the forefront, a lot of the frame behind it is *so* based on minimal technical nuance that it doesn't really nestle onto you in the same way, if that makes sense? i'm mostly positive about plot elements on main but i've been eyeing the asa erasure with skepticism for a while. it's really a much weaker story without her, no matter what thematic point that i think is being made here. i mean, perhaps because when you deplete the asa to the story you're left with denji - who is mostly *passive*, doesn't produce narrative (unlike asa/makima) which writes the story for you. denji's brilliance is in spurts, contrasted/set against other character's selves - often in refutation of them - in a desperate kind of <proof of life>, of having been imbued with thus written experience, of this being so deeply felt - & this is what gets to fans too, i feel. his life as visible through <written> form/against, caught within structure & other's wants. this is also why i think those nayuta chapters (as an extension of mkm) were so great because of what it did for nayuta & denji. you see him through her eyes, & then you see *him.* i think the issue with asa is that a large amt of her character also has like a (similar to denji) self hate, a repression which makes itself known very well when we're inside her head but atp rn we can't see that at all, because she's modelled herself (& i think this is rlly cool narratively) around the idea of the CSM she's meant to work as an extension of. & this self modelling paired w. being Out of her head makes her feel (to me) awfully flat. & this is upsetting, because i really like asa!

but at some levels i appreciate the ambition to p2's greater story that i can forgive individual characters being diluted in the fray. but this isn't true for everyone | shouldn't even be because csm is a story *felt* through its characters, within its absurdity... the reason most people like it is because aspects of it resonate with them. & this kind of jarr is pretty much fjmt's biggest writing issue - it's what i've personally criticised / seen others criticise w. p1 (power's character's writing towards the end) & it's why i see people rightfully criticise p2.

this is already a very self indulgent thread so i'm also going to bring up *why* i like characters such as reze, makima, togata: their character presentation compels enough to really intertwine with the flesh of them in ways that are... kind of hard to ignore to fully receive the story. if that makes sense: their surface is so much condensed trope.. in fact, this is true of even aki who i think i'd argue is the best written character in p1 functioning outside the (makima-denji) centre w. the revenge trope.

anyway: it's kind of also because of these reasons that i feel that p2 will just *work* better when read as a whole,, because of the frame fjmt has himself set up it becomes a little difficult to resonate w. it in individual moment, chapter to chapter, because atp you have to either be (a) incredibly aware of this larger structure which is... difficult to do for a weekly release at least to sustain a good amt of immersion or (b) recognise the narrative that emanates from trauma reltd. mechanism & since this is more personal: it's harder to find yourself here & it becomes.. disconnected, frustrating moment after moment where it becomes not just a <character work> but a <one character work>. & i find this hits in these instances w. people who empathise w. denji as do i! but i find little discussion of this as Implication rippling into story structure (although fjmt's story is built on/into his main character as it was in p1)... it's Hard without a writing force like mkm to make denji cohere into a largely invisible narrative.

honestly could talk more about this for ages:: even wrt. my issues with like... a large amount of the back half of Fire Punch which don't come from a place of thematic incoherency at all. i legit feel fujimoto needs a frame for his story to work <within instance> & i see him trying to bring in katana etc. here (& other male characters) in order to deploy what he's saying but their framings don't.. linger enough to really grip into you as Story imo. the single family callback into p1 makima shook me far more.

wishful thought but i think asa's head would be interesting to get into because we *have* yuko there as meaningful setup in order to really direction... i loved the yuko dialogue use in 165 but her ghost feels. Almost too subtle rn, imo. this is just like,,, a small portion of my thoughts regarding p2 & its criticisms rn;; bear in mind, i really like/hold bias towards the themes p2 is playing with [concurrs a lot w. my interests] but i also really enjoy going on & on about storytelling technique LMAO. i'm looking forward to seeing how this arc concludes.

[nectar-cellar]

💕 self-love time! talk about which ones of YOUR creations (edits, artworks, fanfics) you like the most then send to other sim-blogs to do the same 💕

i love this question, thank you for spreading the positivity!!

i really love my vlad and bella one shot. i make story posts so rarely because i struggle with writer's block and writing is a skill i don't often practice. i cant even name the last book/story i read... i've really neglected my hobby of reading and writing. but i just love the photography and mini story i came up with for that.

here's the link for those who want to read it from start to finish.

i kind of cringe at the writing tbh. but it's ok. i give myself permission to write imperfectly.

obviously, my count vlad sim is one of my favourite sims i've ever made. sometimes i change up his beard and his outfit, but his face has stayed the same, that's how perfect he is to me. 💘

for my cc, i can't believe i've actually created so much stuff when you browse through the tag on my blog. i love the sportswear set i came up with. at first i just wanted to make a tight compression shirt. then my ideas kept expanding until it ended up as a whole set. also, i got a few people to test it out for me and i loved seeing their sims wearing it. i think that download sums up my blog and sense of humour pretty well. i can't believe how many downloads it got and i often see it in other people's screenshots. i just love it. show me all your pixel beefcake.

i am also really proud of the beard packs i made. first, because figuring How To Make A Beard was such a journey. second, because i use those beards sooo much on my own sims and they just make them look so good UGH! third, because they're also the items that get downloaded the most which i never expected. at first i only planned to make one beard pack, i never thought i'd end up getting so many ideas or that i would be able to actually execute them. i see those beards in so many ts3 screenshots here, on twitter, and on youtube, it just makes me feel like wow i really contributed something to this community that everyone can enjoy over and over again.

and i can't even take full credit for making them because they wouldn't have been possible without the textures by @/imamiii , simple life, omega starr, etc. so it almost feels like a tribute to the creators who came before me and whose stuff i loved before i ever was a cc creator. that is how i feel about making cc, like it's my way of giving back and continuing the tradition of making and sharing cc for fun, creativity, and community above everything. 💗

[loppiopio]

i've been sitting on this post for a few days now and it's literally just, me making assumptions about kudos i've noticed on fics lately (particularly aci since i've been checking that fic every week for book club these past few months) and this'll make me seem more insane than i already come off but by this point. how much lower can i go?

just going from top to down as of today.

[ShibaLee] i know you from your art on here!! tumblr user shibaleeart i'm happy to see more people in potentially enjoying the stories this fandom has to offer :>

[reiscm] shizuchansmilk?? what are youuu doing here? i didn't know you read shizaya fic tbh and i was surprised to see you here suddenly, relatively recently too. does that mean you just started the fic then?? after at least a year of being in the fandom right? maybe this wasn't from your first time reading it (same) but at the very least it shows you visited it not too long ago… i may be delusional in thinking i could be a contributing factor there because, why now? it's not like i'm the only aci advocate out there but i've probably been the most vocal about it around this time soo… well whatever it is, hope you had fun with it! i'm so curious what drrr comedian shizuchansmilk thinks about hit fanfiction a cheap imitation 👁️

i'm also recognising some of the other names around here like [anonymooose] and [durarasaiki] even though i haven't the faintest idea who they might be. i've just been seeing them lately across different shizaya fics which probably means these are the people doing their shizaya fic dive around this time. i have nothing more to add there i just, think it's cool noticing the same names across fics like yeah, we all feasting on the shizaya tag rn.

[ya_boi_twink] it took me a second to recall where i'd recognised your name from and then it hit me. i knoooow you! tumblr user yaboitwink in my notifs… i appreciate you, and i'm glad you liked the things i made for it c:

[bun_o_ween] oh i know you're here because of mr crapo. i hope you guys had fun with it! i wanna take the chance to also admit that like. the moment i found out you were that sebastian writer i experienced the wildest sense of deja vu. because. i had seen your name on ao3 before. but when i checked your fics there was no way i'd read a fic from you?? so then i realised i must have recognised you... through other kudos on other fics??? dude. i must sound crazy, i have no way of proving this because i actually don't remember what fics these were i just vaguely remember it was either bsd or tgcf? that i was looking at fics for, trying to find something to sate my hunger at the time. and i just remember, noticing your name across like a few of these fics in a row and thinking "heh someone else has been going down the same rabbit hole" AND NOW I SEE YOU AND CRAPO OF SHIZAYA FANDOM HITTING IT OFF it was surreal. like. my awareness of you had zero to do with black butler, i could not have predicted that you would have been the random ao3 user i'd seen apparently enjoying some of the same fics i was not too long ago. wow.

there are like two separate flamingo related names around here [niceflamingo] and [flamingoo] which doesn't mean anything but for some reason they are standing out enough for me to want to mention them. i feel like i've seen ao3 user flamingoo in the kudos of some other fic before but idk.

[Luzki] omg hey!! twitter artist vi_138_ woah hiii funny seeing you here :0 especially like. not so long ago? since i'd imagined you would've been aware of the fandom for a while since you seem more invested in the alts than shizuo and izaya in particular? well it was cool seeing that you'd read this one, i hope ya had fun!

[frogsarefriends] right under that is artist hallucxnating >:O i know they've read the fic already but it was cool to actually recognise their kudo down here, especially since it's like. not recognisable just from the name alone, but you've shared links to this ao3 as your writing so now i know it's you. my impression is that you came into the fandom through slavhew since, i'd connected the dots at some point that you two were friends which. made a lot of sense since i noticed you both started being active around here at the same time lol. but hey!! welcome to the club :D

[7FlyingPancakes7] this is one of the ones i'd noticed earlier on during book club, i distinctly remember checking a chapter while walking home one night (because i do that i guess) then BAM what the hell?? i just see tumblr user mari-lair's ao3 appear down there, totally out of nowhere for me. for context this was a writer from the tpn fandom i recognise from like 4 years ago? idk it's been a while, i didn't talk to them much but they were active in the fandom at the time so i'm familiar with their name. i haven't been keeping up with them but last i'd seen they seemed to be into tbhk with no indication as far as i was aware that they'd shown any interest in shizaya. nothing wrong with that it was just unexpected, so i was just like woah!! how did you get here? i am so curious how they may have come across this fic, was it some rec from a friend? how familiar are they with shizaya? how invested were they in the story and characters? enough to go down more of shizaya's greatest hits? anyways, that was just a fun little small world moment for me.

[psych0tastic] hey isn't this…. axietoh? like, the artist who used to draw shizaya like 5 years ago? what are they doing here so high up the list? 🤔 i have no clue lol i still follow them because i really like their art style but i hadn't noticed their interest in shizaya resurfacing... i suppose they just haven't been too active on these socials in general. anyways their name stood out to me and i was like, wait….. well it's a shocker seeing their name so high up here, were they reading this fic for the first time there or were they revisiting it and happened to have not kudo'd it until then? well anyways, it's nice to see they've revisted the fic within the last two years at least :0 that's cool to me.

[MiyukiWynter] dude i was feeling crazy just now trying to figure out where i'd recognised this name from because i'd swwooooorn i'd seen it from somewhere like as someone on twitter?? i think i was mixing them up in my mind with unrelated (as far as i'm aware) twitter user miiyankhr but turns out they're someone who's fics i've seen in the tags before. i haven't read them myself but apparently they just posted a new one two days ago so that's crazy.

[Dodomka] heyyy it's dodo from twitter, hellooo 👋 they've been the biggest supporter for my deep in the sauce fic tweets and for that i appreciate them very much :3 didn't expect to see them here tbh i wasn't aware of when they'd first read the fic but as i was expanding the list a few times to write up this post i noticed their name here and just thought that was neat. shout-out to them!

[mochi010] there's a user named mochi that has shown up in my twitter notifs somewhat regularly and they have nothing on their account so i have zero clue what they might be like outside from that they've been liking my shizuo and izaya retweets. their handle isn't even mochi so i have very little reason to believe this could be them but idk, maybe? no conclusion has been made here. well i already spent time writing and cleaning up the paragraph, guess i'm leaving it in.

shout-out to [ouiouipussay] and [ramenflavorpacketsnorter420] just for having some names that stand out lol. i don't recognise you from anywhere but, i guess now i will if i ever come across those names again.

[Stupidusernamepolicy] i struggled to find you amidst all these names for the writing of this post 💀 had to ctrl+f that shit. but i remember seeing your name here while i was going through the list some days before and being like "oh hey!! it's slavhew :)" but okay there's actually a tangent i've been wanting to go on from here.

outside of aci i've actually been noticing you and hallucxnating double duo'ing under some fics together, like after the story era which i'd reread after hallu reminded me of its existence in a reply, and also sacramental which i had reread because of your reply, lol. i find this quite funny, just like. this visual representation of you two reading and recommending fics with each other. then you talk about it on twitter and more people like me are visiting this fic too. chain reaction of sharing stories :)

ALSO [anonymooose] and [durarasaiki] spotted down here in some of these kudos too!! that's craazy. wow. i tell you guys i'm recognising these names i'm not just crazy 😭

[NotElectricT] this took me a second to dig up again since it's quite buried down that list at this point but the plan i'd had in mind for this post was to end on this one since i saw them kudo it right in front of me (through the vc stream) and i didn't think this post would get as long as it did but... well i already wrote it 😬 but yeah, this is my good friend note! check out this art they made for, still one of their favourite chapters, sharks fly. it's sandwiched in between some squid game au they made for a gift exchange for me..... it's a long story i don't wanna talk about it (embarrassing......)

but what i do wanna talk about!! is how note (referred to as "patient zero" regarding aci book club by the only other patient lol) just decided to read this fic completely of their own volition?? i didn't tell them to do that and for sure didn't expect them of all people to try reading it, ever (they're not really a fic reader) but they just did that, two years ago. and that was like, insane to me at the time because it's seriously so out of their depth guys they don't do enemies to lovers.... they still don't lol. but i was insane about this fic back then with no one to really be insane about it to so i just yelled about it to these friends out of context and i guess???? that was convincing enough to get this one to start the longest fic they'd ever read 💀

i had much fun having someone experience the fic i'd been insane over..... like i'm smiling about it rn thinking about the time i did a live reading of the chainsaw man (as i like to call him) chapter which was so fun i kinda forgot i had a hamilton musical i was supposed to watch that evening... that was awkward. and other chats we exchanged regarding the fic (they were reading chapters whenever they felt like it which i enjoyed because i like pacing these things out) but for some reason (i think things just happened around the time that disrupted the momentum) they never made it past chapter 26 😔 which was tragic to me but oh well....

well i'm am even more insane about this fic now because of this convoluted chain of events that gradually built and cascaded me towards whatever the fuck i'm doing now!! god. i've never made so much, anything, like ever. until now. because both note and rosa (who has not kudo'd this fic as far as i'm aware lol) made the decision beyond my expectations to commit to, a book club. which i organised. and i've been having a lot of fun! so much fun, there's all this wild "marketing" stuff i've been churning out in record fucking time by my standards. i've never felt so creatively fulfilled dude, never finished a thing in my life until these past few months. so that's awesome, and it's in large part because of note having committed to this fic again. so that's some of the story behind that one kudo haha.

and now we're at chapter 49, we're supposed to be talking about it tomorrow, which is today by now since it's 1 am but uhhhhhhh writing is so hard. i was supposed to just be cleaning up this draft i'd written like 5 days ago? i am now very hungry. there's actually more i'd drafted up from here just from more names i recognised as i kept expanding the kudo list that day buuuut i'm fuckeeeen cutting this off right here. i need to stop. the end.

[birchbow]

How exactly do moirails work? I keep getting confused between what constitutes a matespiritship and moirailegence. I know that moirails are able to help sooth and calm but I feel that there is way more to moirails than just that and I’m having a hard time understanding.

Ahhh, well, this is one of those things that's really only defined in-comic in a fairly skeletal way, and the form it takes in fics is always going to be like 50% headcanon, minimum. And in my case probably more because I've been fascinated by the concept of non-sexual romance/intimacy for a long time and so I've written a LOT of pale content lol. SO here's some rambling about moiraillegiance, which I'm pre-emptively putting under a cut because I know myself.

First, a brief review. Pale-related things we get in the canon, at a quick top-of-my-head scan, are basically:

some trolls are a more emotionally unstable/violent and will find somebody who complements their personality and helps keep them from murderously flying off the handle.*

of the four quadrants of relationships trolls are expected to have, this is not a concupiscient (sexual) one** but it is a (positive emotions toward your partner) one, which Karkat and the narration frame as "pity" (see "****")

At one point, a scene that appears to be setting up for a death-match is defused by one party shh-ing the other one and patting their face until they calm down, from which fandom took 'shooshing" and 'papping' as terms, from the sound effects in those panels.***

talking about your thoughts and emotions is mentioned several times in the context of pale relationships****, and I believe at one point called a feelings jam although I don't have it in me to dig back and see if that one is canon

that is the canon stuff that occurs off the top of my head

*how much of the part where the narrative explains quadrants is biased (because of what a shitshow Alternia is) is up for debate **fandom interpretation varies on this from "having sex with your moirail is a huge taboo" to "it's totally fine, it's just not one of the quadrants the drones demand contributions for". ***And also where I (and quite a few other people I would guess) started thinking about trolls having separate, alien instincts and responses to stimuli that humans would find relatively unremarkable, like having their face patted or having somebody shush them ****Alternia aggressively punishes perceived weakness to the point that seeing another troll being vulnerable and not killing them for it is narrated as "pity" which is the closest we seem to get to an Alternian-culture concept of "love". ANYWAY that probably has a finger on the needle RE: how exclusive it is to ONLY talk to your moirail about your feelings, because they're in a relationship with you and therefore hopefully won't cull you for it.

Things that are NOT canon include: most of it lmao. If you wanted an itemized list of things in my Troll Society writing that were made up almost entirely whole cloth, we would be here all day. Moving on!

When it comes to writing pale vs flushed, I mostly go by vibes, tbh lol. I suppose if I had to organize my criteria a little bit,,, I am going to spitball. Bear with me.

Pale looks at its partner and goes "I see the things wrong with you, and instead of culling you for them, we are going to fix them" and also "the place where we both are is a place we're both steady and safe" (passive/steadying/protective),

and flush is more like. "I see the things wrong with you, and instead of culling you for them I'm suffering them with you" and also "the place where we both are is a place where we Want More" (active/passionate/aggressive I guess??? Can't find the word).

or to rephrase

pale->unpicking feelings, controlling violent impulse, steadying emotional state, physical touch to invite a sort of subspace-adjacent hazy alien-arousal-that's-not-arousal.

flush->passionate, intense, active attraction, sometimes kind of violent! sometimes too passionate for its own good! Physical touch to work each other up and drive each other higher in a positive way (hopefully) (mostly) (trolls are violent assholes tbh)

I DON'T KNOW DUDE there's no guide for this stuff lol. As evidenced above, canon basically has just like a skeleton framework, so we are all out here putting these lines down ourselves.

Making this more complicated: regardless of what the author of any given fic headcanons as the social norm, it also makes sense to me that there are variations in trolls just like in humans. I usually don't write my pale pairings fucking, but it seems reasonable and inevitable to me that some trolls would be into that! Or trolls who were attracted to concupiscient quads but didn't want to bone down, although that's dangerous and untenable for reasons mentioned in previous asks.

fig 1: Meenah and Kurloz's swinging back and forth² from the (hate+fucking) quadrant to the (love/pity+no fucking³) quadrant in PoF felt like it came naturally as I was writing, because what else are two of the oldest, most powerful trolls in the universe going to do, when each of them is the only person around who comes close to actually knowing the other enough to hate/pity?

²Switching back and forth between quadrants is actually called "vacillating" and seems to be a fairly common event in troll society and media--the blurring/combining pale and pitch that they're doing is the more scandalous part, according to general fanon ³I have always preferred to write pale relationships with a lot of the traits my culture associates with sexual relationships (nudity, intimacy, an industrial porn complex lol) but to cut the sex and leave the rest and play with that contrast. How much of that is because I'm personally not sexually attracted to people, and I'm deeply Emotions about a society recognizing that kind of relationship as crucial and desirable??? I mean idk boss y'all don't pay me for introspection lol.

ANYWAY that also means the boundaries of what any given troll defines as "too much intimacy not to be pale" or "the feelings you're talking to me about are too personal for this not to be pale" or "you're touching me in a way that seems pale (or flushed)" are going to be different, which makes this extra hard to answer. Example!!

When I write Kurloz, I write him with an old-fashioned and strict view of what quadrants entail, but also being too old and above too many laws and social norms to give much of a shit about whether he blurs those lines or not most of the time. The little nods to things like it being slutty In His Time to wear your hair short and show off the roots of your horns hopefully bring across some of the cranky old man vibes lmao.

VERSUS when I write Karkat, I'm writing a much younger guy who spends a ton of time thinking about relationships and watching romcoms, synthesizing his own very in-depth thesis of What Feelings Are--and also just coming from a much younger generation. He's not nearly as comfortable blurring the lines, but he also places those lines in very different spots than Kurloz does.

TBH follow your heart haha it's just an alien sandbox and we're all just slapping sand around.

[beauty-and-passion]

Just wanted to say that I've been a long-time fan of yours, since before PoF, and your analyses were some of the most well-thought out, nuanced and well-researched pieces on the site (my favorites are the playlist analyses they're like my comfort ones lmao). Even tho I've drifted away from the fandom, I still check back in here every now and again to see what's going on. Whilst I love ur series, I do think it's sad you've had to give urself that closure, which is one of my biggest hang-ups with this series. This painful, slow decline where SaSi drags on and on, losing all its momentum & fans and ending with a quiet sizzle rather than a bang as it should, is the worst way to end a series that touched so many people, including me. Tbh, if Thomas is going to use his ever-patient SaSi fans to milk views and money for his other series, he owes it to them to at least finish it properly. He owes his fans a lot of things, and a S2 finale is the main one, you can't milk SaSi for views and not create an episode for 2 years, you can't have your cake and eat it too. Don't want to do it anymore? Cut it, end it, so people can finally move on. The decline of SaSi has been one of the saddest things to witness, but I'm glad you're branching out into other things (tbh kudos for making it this long) and I'll stick around anyway even if ur analyses aren't SaSi because I don't read them for the content, but for the captivating way you write :)

Oh no, compliments! My only weakness!

But seriously, it's beautiful to feel so appreciated and I thank you a lot for that. I am glad you enjoy my analyses so much and it makes me very happy to know they have a good use. If they can help someone feel better, then I will keep writing them until the end of time - no, you can't take back your words now, they will come and be stupidly long because I love to ramble about stuff I like :P

Your words about SaSi are perfectly understandable and I agree with everything you say. It's really a shame that this series is slowly declining and it probably won’t end up like a bang, as it deserved.

Sure, Thomas explained a lot of things and it's now a bit clearer why this happened. However, this doesn't take away from the fact that the organization is pitiful and the lack of communication shouldn't have happened at all, not in a competent team. There are definitely issues and I hope Thomas will work on them as soon as possible, because they can affect his future projects too.

I felt we were going in this direction and I was growing frustrated. So, I did what I do every time there is something I don't like: I try to fix it, even if just for myself. And that's what I did with FSS3. I wanted to see these threads close in a satisfying way, I wanted to see the themes I care about being developed as they deserve. I wanted to give these characters a mature development, because I deeply love them and I deeply love the concept and the possibilities of Sanders Sides.

So, I put my ideas down - with the help of all the people who contributed to the survey. And now, I feel much more satisfied. I know FSS3 isn’t canon, but it’s as close to canon as possible - and, hopefully, will keep being like that for some time too. It’s something I wanted and needed and I’m glad people appreciated it and felt it was good for them too.

And now, I will gladly branch into other stuff. I need to do a bit of a makeover on the blog and expand the “not SaSi” section, first. Then I already have three series I want to talk about and one will be very long, so it might take a lot of time. And then Eurovision will come in May and the Book of Bill will come out in June and maybe I will also talk about the books I love in the future? Or about other series I follow and enjoy? I still don’t know, but be sure I won’t run out of things to talk about. I just wish my ramblings will be worthy of your time and I will keep deserving your appreciation, no matter what I’ll talk about <3

[dirtbagdefender]

🩷🧡💛💚🩵💙💜💐🌸 Gimme Billy thoughts for the soul pls n thx

🩷 Why are they your favorite?

ok ok ok . so for as short of a time as we got billy - we got a LOT of characterization for him. like, even with max, we didn't get that much characterization. why? was it dacre? i lean more towards yes than i would contribute that being w the duffers tbh. back to my point - that backstory is legitimately one of the most intriguing characters i've seen in a long time. and there's so much to play with there! he's not just your typical cardboard "bully" -- THERE'S MEAT ON THAT SKELETON, you know?!?

❤️ How did you discover them/get into them?

oh man, so one of my friends loves steve, and she was aghast that i hadn't watched stranger things and i was like, "alright, watch it with me." so. and that was *checks calendar* the fourth of this year. so. you know. normal amount of time to be this obsessed. mhm.

🧡 Do you have anything in common with them?

we're both california transplants in indiana! and... while i didn't live on the ocean quite like he did, i miss being within driving distance of the coast. and uhhhhh. terrible relationships with our dads is 😎 good times. plus, being dramatic is bitchin'.

💛 Do you have any polar opposite traits to them?

i would much rather be playing dnd with eddie and the nerd squad rather than lifting weights with billy.

💚 What are your favorite added rep headcanons for them? (queer labels, disabilities, nationalities, ethnicities, etc.)

ohhhhh i love all of them, because they all feel like... they're common enough for me to get the gist of him, but the way different people write him is so interesting! i think my most favorite is that billy's gay. there's a few where i've read post-s3 where he's disabled from the mind flayer and THOSE are SO GOOD.

🩵 What's a popular headcanon for them you just can't get behind?

not that i can think of? i like seeing what hc's people come up with, how they see them, you know? if there's an hc someone has for him that doesn't fit my version, that's okay! that's their version, and that's the fun in hc's!

💙 What's a popular headcanon for them that you adore?

that he just wants to protect max, as much as he abhors how he's responsible for her. that even though they fought and whatever, at the end of the day, he loved max. i also love when he welcomes the rest of the party into his protection, like a little mother duck or something. oh, i really love when billy has powers, too. 😈

💜 'Put that guy into situations' or 'take that guy out of situations'?

¿ por que no los dos ? put my mans in more situations with children. (specifically erica, so he can shoot down those racist allegations and also be read to absolute filth in .5 seconds from a girl who barely comes up past his hip) get him out of situations with neil.

💐 What are your favorite poly ship(s) for them, if any?

hmmm. harringroveson is the only one i know of? ALTHOUGH i do enjoy the thought of stevexrobinxbilly. so. uh. harringrovely? anyway.

🌸 What are your favorite mono ship(s) for them, if any?

my fave is definitely harringrove. i haven't dipped my toe in mungrove, but i could be persuaded. platonically i love him being besties with heather and being bullied by a mean lesbian who isn't intimidated by his machismo attitude. as seen above, i really love him having a soft spot for erica, as well as jane. and being a "good" big bro to max.

[anti-katsuki-lounge]

Hey, hope you're doing well <3

Anyway, I feel like the story really needs to give Izuku a break tbh. When you said "sometimes it feels MHA is dark for the sake of being dark" I realised why it's been especially bland for me as well. Hori doesn't give Izuku a break because he wants to make an impact with this arc, make everyone feel how urgent, how important this is but because it's becoming the norm for this arc, people are getting used to it. "Oh another bad day? Yeah, happened yesterday too." It's not impactful if the same thing keeps happening. It's becoming normalized, at least for me lmaoo

The buildup was exciting but the result was anticlimactic, plus I haven't been attention much because I confess I only read MHA for Neito, so from what I've seen it's just power up after power up and missed opportunities.

Anyway, I'm guilty of finding your blog recently and coming here over and over lmaoo. Most of my friends love Bakugou, and the ones that don't don't know him at all pfft- so your blog is heaven

Thank you for the kind words and I hope you’re doing well too 😊.

Honestly I agree with you. I feel Izuku never gets a chance to rest. Closest he’s really gotten was the Culture Festival where he was fighting Gentle rather than a villain that was trying to go for his throat, but besides that, he’s never allowed to breathe.

Now, I love a good dark story. Marvel’s Moon Knight’s one of my favorite characters and his stories get insanely dark to the point where Batman’s darkest stories look like kids books. However, when writing a dark story, one has to know when it’s too dark. Moon Knight’s a story about a man who was killed, revived by a God, serves as the God’s idea of vengeance, and has his mind absolutely shattered as a result. This setup allows Moon Knight to get away with being extremely dark as it contributes to the themes of his story.

Invincible is another story that goes dark, but again, it serves an important purpose and that’s to set up the world, the central conflict, and characters.

Izuku is a hero in training wanting to follow the footsteps of his idol. Naturally there’s times where it’s going to get dark, but the problem is that Horizon doesn’t know how to balance the darker aspects of MHA with the hopeful aspects he’s constantly having the heroes preach about. Things like Twice’s and Himiko’s stories are dark aspects of the story that work because they set up a conflict and showcase what happens when heroes abandon their hopeful attitude, leaving two people with broken minds. However there’s some parts where we clearly see Hori just trying to be edgy. The heroes literally use him as bait, he’s working himself to exhaustion, and for what reason? Why not keep Izuku in a safe house? If this kid runs out of energy while fighting a villain, which almost happened btw, then AFO can scoop him up before the heroes get to him. The arc was meant to show Izuku that he can’t do things alone, but really all it does is torture him for no reason, and ends up being redundant because the reason he left, being that he didn’t want to involve his friends in a fight against OFA, ends up being validated (Katsuki “dies”, Kyouka’s jack gets ripped off, etc.). It just feels depressing, and not in a way which makes you think about the story and what’s going to happen next, but in a way which makes you think “when the hell is this madness going to end?”

[madisonbeersource]

HIIII LOVE 🤗

Don't worry, I am very happy to read your message. That's all that matters

I hope you are well

And oh yes I understand you very well, h2ao is not my favorite either but at the same time I've been listening to the song literally on loop like too many times these days hahaha. And the mv is so perfect! for me it's one of the best mv's Mads ever made

And omg it's true, it seems CRAZY to me that they recorded the whole mv in one day, it's like how is it possible. It has a lot of merit

And yes, the whole story that surrounds it, with the cheating of the alien boyfriend in space and how in the last scene Madison alien appears... it's too good . And you're right, madison's contribution in all this is very noticeable

What's your favorite scene in the mv? I'm pretty undecided, but my favs moments would be when Madison at the beginning is in the dress and the black bow and sings "call me "baby" and the fan effect comes out (I just adore it), when Madison appears in that white suit in the ufo, her as an alien at the end of it all and also that moment when she sticks out her tongue, it was so adorable. But I literally LOVED the whole entire music video

Oh and another question, what's your ranking between Reckless, Dangeorus, Showed me and Home to another one? I'm curious

It always makes my day to write to you and hear from you, especially if I see the beautiful gifs you're making! Keep it up, love

Love youuu so much 🌘💙👽

I hope you're well too bub and i'm okay thank u for asking, truly<3

honestly i think i know the song by heart too now lmao it's a no skip song you know not the fave yet not a skip and that is my queen doing her magic we can't deny that!!

EXACTLY I LOVE THIS SO MUCH and she makes so many podcasts now i love this for her

.........................hm i think the white suit on the UFO is a personal fave because istg i could turn full on lesbian for this moment only lmaoo but the whole music video is a bop tbh!! i love the 50s aesthetic

hm...................... Reckless, showed me, dangerous and home to another one!! wbu love?

you gonna make me cry i love u so much i love seeing u on my ask box/messages u're a ray of sunshine in the dark honestly.<3

I LOVE YOU MY QUEEN

[cloudbells]

Okay....tbh....possible long post, possible temp post. Rmablings that don't make sense the longer it goes on lol.

When it comes to being a pro-Steve, anti-Accords, Tony lover, stony OTP, I feel like I'm often put in a weird spot. Like, if people were ao3 fics and those were my tags, there would nawt be many people available to meet by the time you finished filtering.

People who are pro Steve and also anti-Accords usually aren't stony shippers and likely couldn't give a fuck about Tony (or outright hate him and I'm too weak to handle Tony bashing #sawry), or they completely left the fandom - People who are Tony loving, Stony OTPers are a usually a miss the second we start talking about Steve - People who are anti-Accords Stony shippers have left the fandom in droves and/or started writing for a different Steve ship and people who are anti-Accords, Tony lovers are literal unicorns or they hate Steve anyways. And there are even more combinations that I'm not gonna mention right now. Too many.

I'm not even saying I've never ran into anyone that has the same "tags" as me. That would be a lie since I frequently speak with.....about two others.

But my grievance is that there isn't more? I think. I actually don't know my point, I'm just venting.

I guess - Like, you'll see my in a lot of stony spaces but I don't really particpate or interact with others because of the whole....Steve thing (and slight tangent - the Tony thing too because I've come to the realization that my view and characterization of Tony doesn't align as well with a lot of people and maybe it's the canon bootlicker in me giving me a different or extra perpspective but omg?). You won't find me in spaces dedicated to hating Tony even if they are super pro-Steve, anti-Accords because I actually, wholeheartedly love Tony a lot lol. I think he's wrong to do what he does often, but that's why I'm great at looking into his character and making excuses for him if I'm prompted to do so by people who hate Tony.

And I just feel like so many amazing fandom contributers were pushed out the fandom and got so exhausted (after CACW mainly) and it makes me sad lol. It also makes me how much more of an asshole I would be if I were around when CACW. Cause I've said this before, but I came out of that movie as a Steve stan. I liked him before, but that movie soldified it for me, so imagine the whiplash I got when everyone aparently thought he was evil or something. I think I'd be the biggest B.I.T.C.H around actually if I was a Steve fan and a Stony shipper during that time. God's strongest soldiers.

Also this is not a "woe is me, I fit nowhere in fandom" post because one, I don't believe that and two, I don't aim to get too close to fandom anyways. I'm just venting because I do feel awkward at times. It's the main reason I don't give Tony metas out anymore. I have so many thoughts about him, but my position as a Stony shipper is awkward to me.

I have more to say, but I'm not the best at detangling my thoughts and making something coherent out of them, so I'll leave this here! <3 Thanks for reading if you got this far.

[sitzfleischh]

So I just finished watching Gomens s1 + 2 for the first time ever yesterday lol I read the book years ago and loved it but never got around to the show. I just saw your post about the structure of s2 feeling weird, and is that the general consensus from fans? I've just dipped my toes into Fandom today, so I have no idea the popular thoughts and metas, so from my pov s2 worked super well, and I actually liked it waaaaay more than s1 but maybe that's bc I didn't have years of s1 to sit on and it's ALL fresh and new? Iunno I just found that really interesting lol

Good question! I certainly can't speak for the whole fandom but from what I've seen on here I think there was a mix of reactions ranging from the folks sending hate to Neil Gaiman because they couldn't deal emotionally with there being a sad cliffhanger, to folks who totally loved the season as-is, to some who thought that the writing was bad but actually it was bad on purpose as a long-con magic act plan that will all be revealed later, to some who enjoyed it overall but were either thrown off by how different it was from season one, or thought it had some issues in terms of pacing and quality of dialogue/etc.

I fall somewhere on the more positive end of that last camp, so my post about the structure feeling weird was partly a response to some of the more negative responses I had come across-- like there were posts I was seeing where folks were trying to insinuate that S2 was uniquely worse or different writing from season 1 and I was kind of like... No I think whatever writing/tonal issues good omens has have always existed and have more to do with the way that the silliness and satire of the novel translates differently on screen (but that's a whole 'nother post I should write sometime haha).

But also tbh I think it was mostly just me thinking through my own reaction to the series, which was somewhere along the lines of: I loved it and had a great time but it felt weird to me in a way that made me go "time to put on the ol' analysis goggles and figure out what's going on here."

I totally think that having the long wait between season 1 and 2 contributed to that feeling though, so you're right on the money there. I wasn't really part of the GO fandom in the years between season 1 and 2 but I imagine if I had been all of this would have been even more heightened because you're stewing for so long in fanon works and meta and expectations about how the story will go from here, so inevitably there's going to be some culture shock in returning to canon after so long. Also just the fact that for a long time after season one we didn't even know there was going to be any more! Which I think was the main factor influencing my experience of season 2, as someone who first read the book 11 years ago so I've spent over a decade thinking the character arcs and story beats of Good Omens had been completed, so while season 2 was very welcome and appreciated, I went into it kind of expecting it would also be a mostly complete self-contained story arc like season 1 was.

Anyway I kind of went off the rails a bit here LOL, analysing and critiquing shows is the way I express my love for them, and I love Good Omens so much and have for over a decade, which means all I wanna do all day is take it apart and look at the pieces to figure out how it works

Sorry for the very long and rambly response but thank you so much for the message, I hope I answered your question!! ♥️♥️

[planeoftheeclectic]

Oh, do tell more about "Columbo: Turnabout's Fair Play".

oh geez ok I don't know how much I can say because I have been trying so hard not to spoil the mystery but let's go.

There are a few people who know how it will end/what the twist is, most of whom don't care much about Ace Attorney and were unlikely to ever read it in the first place and one of whom cares negatively about spoilers. This is because I was very anxious that the twist leading to the break in the case was too contrived and I wanted an outside opinion.

This was because I began writing TFP before I finished playing Bridge to the Turnabout. All subsequent worries about "realism" and "physics" and "the laws of science" have since been summarily dismissed.

I am currently working on some things that are very close to what will go in the epilogue and I really can't say more than that or I'm worried you'll figure it out immediately. Suffice to say: I like mirroring.

In the past 24 hours I have discovered two musical themes from AA4 that I will absolutely be using as writing ambiance because they are exactly what I've been looking for. One is Phoenix's theme, one is ostensibly the Gramarye's theme but honestly might as well work for Phoenix, both are embedded below for your convenience.

Honestly, the name of that second one is perfect for Phoenix. Man I can't wait until we get there.

Hmmm...I think the only reason I can get away with writing this fic is because I am very good at mimicking other people's vocal patterns - to the point where I have come home from Shakespeare plays speaking in iambic pentameter. (In fairness, that's less hard than it sounds - English is made for that kind of thing.) But Peter Falk is so integral to the concept of Columbo that if you can't nail his patter, your work is just going to be missing something, imo.

Hmm, what else...I think you in particular will be delighted by the ending, which is why I had to stop talking about it with you the moment I realized what it was going to be lol. Which is infuriating because I love our talks and value your contributions so much but I can't and it's driving me insane ahhhhhhhh!! That said! I relish the look on your face when you finally get there, and that expression (multiplied by the other people who read it, which is way more than I expected when I first posted it tbh) is what keeps me going. It's going to be so good. I can't wait. Why isn't it done yet. What do you mean I have to write it first.

I'm still desperately tempted to write the alternative setup I initially proposed, aka "Maya Fey hires her friend the retired detective to get those idiots together it's been like 20 years guys, geez." I probably will write it as totally separate from TFP but man can you imagine.

If I ever write the jokingly hypothetical Klapollo sequel it will be after we've finished at least aa4 and possibly the whole sequel trilogy. Which is probably for the best, given I have palutena trap to work on. That said, I've grown exceptionally fond of Klavier. Possibly because I keep murdering his brother and making horrible things happen to him. ...Sorry about that, buddy.

I somewhat doubt that Phoenix has an official breakdown sprite (excluding the head-on-desk and nervous sweating varieties) but I need to start picturing it, because that scene is coming up sooner than I can imagine. And also farther away. But at least there's only one more Edgeworth chapter forecast. That should help contain their combined loquacious verbosity to a manageable length.

I may have said this before, but I am trying very hard to write everything from the narrative point of view of the TV camera. That's defining chapter breaks, POV's. information delivered, and general tone. It's very fun, and an excellent writing exercise. I get whiplash whenever I go back to palutena trap, which has a much more standard 3rd person limited view (the character's). I would definitely recommend this sort of thing if you want to experiment with your writing style!

Hmm, now for a fun fact to end it on...well, this isn't TFP specific, but I'd like to imagine that Gumshoe is on vacation at a beach somewhere and brought one of his metal detectors and finds a buried treasure chest that is for once not connected to a murder and so he strikes it rich and can finally retire to live a life of luxury eating slightly fancier instant ramen and that's why we never see him after the 7-year gap.

[mercyburned]

2, 4 and 19 for the ship questions!

shipping ask | accepting

what’s the worst thing about shipping for you?

definitely when i get really invested in a ship but the other person loses in it and it just kind of fades out? it's happened a few times and it's really disheartening. of course, everyone's allowed to lose interest and move on to other things ! no one should have to write anything they don't want to. but i think if you've plotted together for a while, a simple heads-up can really go a long way to not making the other person feel badly.

do you prefer to plot a ship, or would you rather “wing it”?

a little bit of both! i love plotting things out, but it does depend also on chemistry. there's been ships i've written that i never saw coming and the chemistry kind of just developed on its own and it was lovely. on the other hand, i've also jumped in with plotting ships out ( like with my closer friends ) and it's been really fun, too. the bottom line though is that ships need chemistry for me whether we try to plot it out or let it develop on its own. ( i will also add that i can usually tell during plotting if the muse chemistry has a good chance to appear on its own - a lot of that is how i vibe with the other mun and how well we bounce ideas off each other / contribute. someone who doesn't contribute very much is not someone i'm going to ship with, but someone who's enthusiastic - even if they're busy and slow to reply - is someone i'm much more open to shipping with. )

is there a ship you used to dislike, but now you like?

hmm... not that i can immediately think of? i've had my mind changed on characters i previously disliked that someone has made me see in a new light, but i haven't really had this happen with ships. there are some ships i've since grown to dislike less, but i still don't enjoy them lmao. i just blacklist what i don't want to see, tbh. and sometimes it's not even a case of dislike, so much as i just... honestly don't see it happening with my portrayals and i don't feel particularly compelled to challenge that view.