#i want to see if this becomes the default position when this happens in the future

[queensuggar]

As sensitively as I can say this: One of my concerns regarding the Tyre Nichols situation is this response from the police department distancing themselves from the offenders. In a vacuum its great that legal action moved so swiftly. I believe, at least on some level, this idea that they acted immediately because the crime was heinous enough that they had no way to spin it. But I'm also aware that framing is so important. The same could be said of virtually all police killings if empathy for the victim was centered in those discussions, but they weren't, even when those killed committed no crimes or were sympathetic figures (Tamir Rice comes to mind). ((Note the freudian slips where they accidentally refer to Tyre as a suspect.))

So why do I dislike it here?

A. Five officers were arrested and others are being investigated and potentially charged. Good. But that doesn't change the fact that the Police department is still responsible for , hiring, training and equipping these people, and letting them loose on the populace. MULTIPLE people have come forward in the aftermath of Tyre's murder to say that this unit in particular was known to be dangerous, but nothing was done. Now they have no choice, but they're framing it as though they're the heroes for doing something when in a just world, Tyre would've never been killed in the first place. They had already failed before this killing even happened, and its disingenous of them to expect praise for failing to do their duty.

B. There's the unavoidable question of if the officers' race played a part in this. Mind you, a cop is a cop. They are protectors of property and the status quo regardless of their color, and often "elevating" someone to the status of police officer disconnects them from their community. So I'm not shocked that this happened at all. If anything I'm annoyed that this is muddying the waters in this conversation. However! While the race of the cops doesn't have much bearing on them being "good" cops or not, their "copness" also doesn't protect them from racism. So am I saying these cops did nothing wrong or are victims? No! Not at all. Unless it literally came out that the whole premise of their arrest and the situation was a lie, they belong *under* the jail. But it does mean its possible that the only reason we're getting this "swift justice" is because they don't have white supremacy to defend them. Which calls to question again the Police Department. How many instances like this may have happened with no or minimal consequences becuase the perpetrator(s) was white? Will this continue to be the strategy when this inevitably happens again or will this be difficult to reproduce because Police Union will fight to the death on their behalf as long as the defendant is white?

I'm just watching this unfold and already grieving for the next person because none of this shit is even gonna change anything.

[smokeypeaches-and-honeyplums]

may I request headcanons for Wukong, MK, Red Son, and Macaque finding out their crush or S/O has a snort laugh that they try to hide?

please and thank you

PLEASE?????????????? GOD I HAVE A SNORT LAUGH TOO AND THIS FEELS SO PERSONAL I'M GONNA BLOW UP

Reader is Gender Neutral by default

MK

S/O

MK absolutely LOVES to make people laugh and you are no different

So when he finds out you have a snort laugh, he REVELS in it

To him, it's a sign that he's doing a really good job and! It's really fucking adorable for him

If you're self conscious about it, he won't push you too much about it

He'd never want you to feel uncomfortable while you're with him, so he'll never push further than he's allowed

He'll always express how much he loves it when he gets the chance to though, don't get me wrong

Eventually, it gets to the point he develops his own and it's a never ending cycle between you two

It feels nice to have a bit more of a positive about your snort, but it does hurt after a while--

MK gets worse when he purposefully does what he knows makes you laugh the most

Your nose and throat hurts by the end of it

If you're laughing especially hard, he'll be grinning ear to ear at just the sound of it

He's glad to have ONE consistency in his life, what with everything that goes on

So if he can listen to your laugh before the next crisis, that's enough for him

(THEY TOOK MY YELLOW TEXT--)

Crush

(darkskinredsontruthertilIdie)

You so happened to slip up one day when Redson heard it the first time around, immediately trying to hide it right after

He didn't think much of it, not in the way you'd think at least

He always associated it as another irritating staple that he loves so much about you and infuriates him that it is

Like, excuse me

How dare you have the most charming, cute and cheeky laugh he's ever heard?

A peasant like you shouldn't be making his heart soar so much and so easily all the damn time

What the fuck >:(

Redson wouldn't trying to fish for it as much as the others, his pride prevents him

But he does savour the moments you do do it, don't get me wrong

However, when he sees you hide it every time right after, a part of him wants to try and ease your worries. At least, that's what he thinks

"You know... you shouldn't feel like you should hide your laugh."

"For all the annoying little quirks you have, this one is..."

"It's... endearing."

Silence.

Silence...

"Redson? Are you going soft on me?"

"NO! No- Do not-"

"D'awwww, you care!!"

"Redson cares for me!!"

"Know what?! Forget I said anything."

Cue the laughter, only this time with a bit more snorting given his reassurance in his own special, Redson way

In your fits of laughter, you miss a small smile growing on the demon prince's lips

In all your teasing, it's worth it to see you like this

Crush

Wukong has a tendency to be cheeky to the tenth degree and then some

So trust and believe he already knows

And he REVELS in it

He likes the sound of your laugh in general, so the fact he manages to get you laughing so much that you start snorting makes his heart do flips

He doesn't like that you try to hide it, but he'd be the last person to talk about not hiding something you're self conscious about

Given the whole shared headcanon of glamour, it becomes pot and kettle

Has that ever stopped him tho?

No

So why would it now?

He tries to get you to feel more comfortable with your laugh because he finds it very important to him

Is it another reason amongst a sea on why he loves you?

Yeah

Will he admit it?

No-

Well?

Not now-

Ahem

Anyways, when he hears your genuine laughter, he's shining like the sun and absolutely BEAMING with joy and whines when you hide it

"NONONO, don't hide it! I love your laugh!"

"Don't hide it please :("

Pulls out the big guns (puppy dog eyes) just to make you agree

"Fine"

Happy Monkey <3

Of course, he genuinely does try to make sure you're comfortable about it and reassures you in his own Monkey King way, so don't be too worried.

S/O

Like Wukong, Macaque is the last person to tell you not to hide something, the scoundrel

Motherfucker is hiding EVERYTHING

Smoke and Mirrors the character™

But, that has never stopped him before

With that established, given how all doom and gloom this brooding monkey is, he finds solace in your laughter, and he's picked up on your snorting even when you try to hide it

He hears all

But, unlike the others, he won't push you or try to convince you to reveal something you don't feel like revealing

He would know how that feels personally

And if Macaque is anything at all, he's self aware. enough

He'll let you get comfortable laughing in front of him to your fullest at your own time, while giving you quiet reassurance now and again

Once you're sure he won't judge you for it and you're fully comfortable, your laughter makes him the warmest he's felt in so long

Who would've thought? The Six-Eared Macaque has a heart!/j

[kanencrow]

The Devil's Lettuce - Natalie Scatorccio | One Shot

Summary: You wake up from a nightmare that leaves you rocked and puts you into a state of restlessness, and Natalie comforts you in the only way she knows how.

Warnings: Smoking, Swearing.

A/N: All characters are 18+ by default. Is it surprising if I say that this is another one shot that I had laying around in my drafts for the past year and a half? No? Maybe? Yes? Anyway, here this is for anyone who's wanting some Nat-Scat content.

Word Count: 2900+

You shot up from the floor with a sharp gasp.

The world around you was dark as your hands slammed against the floor to brace yourself the moment you sat up. You hunkered your head low and panted sharply, and you swore you created holes in the blanket you laid on when your fingers curled in to grip the fabric. You attempted to ground yourself, and your wish of calming down seemed to come true on its own when you felt a hand gently rest itself on your shoulder. The touch was firm, but it didn't hurt you. Instead, it snapped you out of your fear, and it forced you to lift your chin up and look forward, only to meet the comforting eyes of Natalie, who stared at you with a profound amount of concern in her gaze.

"You okay?"

You immediately shook your head and shuddered out what you could only describe as a breath. You were certain that you sounded as though you had been strangled and were attempting to get your bearings back. Natalie seemed to understand such, when she shuffled closer to you, squeezing between your right leg and the wall you slept next to, and wrapped an arm around your shoulders to pull you into her collarbone. You allowed her to do so, while her other limb wrapped around your body, holding you in a hug that you knew was going to eventually become uncomfortable with the way you both were positioned.

Still, even with that backend thought, you melted into her physical comfort and closed your eyes, as you attempted to overcome the fear that your nightmare instilled in you. You couldn't cry, or even speak about what you dreamt, but it was clear that Natalie wasn't planning on questioning you. She simply clutched you tight and looked towards the ladder that led up to the attic – the same attic where Taissa had found the body of the person who once lived in the cabin. Just before you woke, she had to soothe Lottie, who wouldn't stop staring at the same spot. A part of her was glad that you were unbothered by the fact that the man who owned the home you all stayed in was dead.

Though, then again, maybe your nightmare was due to what happened a day ago.

Maybe seeing the skeletal remains of the man had done something to your psyche. But whatever it was, it was clear that it had affected you intensely. And it made Natalie's grip around you tighten in turn. It was a mindless action on her part, but it wasn't one you felt any discontent towards. You melted into the feeling, like ice touching fire, and she could gather an immediate change in your demeanor when your heavy, fearful breathing slowed down into very quiet, almost mute pants. There was a part of her that wanted to understand whatever had gone on inside of your head, but she didn't want to be the one to question you.

She didn't want to beg for your vulnerability.

She wanted it to come naturally. And she was more than willing to wait.

It wasn't like she was going anywhere.

After a moment, you became antsy, and Natalie's arms eventually fell down from your body when you pulled away from her. With your legs once resting over her own, you brought them back to cross them over the other, closing in on yourself in a way, while she scrutinized your quiet demeanor. You seemed like you were in deep thought, your head lowered as you stared at the floor, and your fingers fidgeting together while you slowly gathered your bearings. Her palms rested in her lap as she watched you silently, and it took you a few more long seconds to inevitably speak up, your voice barely above a whisper.

"Thank you."

You were sheepish in nature, and she could recognize it easily. You wore your emotions on your sleeves, which didn't seem like a common occurrence with you. Granted, she didn't know you well, but she had seen and spoken to you enough to where she had the ability to read your personality. Not always was she correct in her assumptions of you, but with this, it was clear that she had come out correct in her opinion of you. You were embarrassed by the fact that you received comfort from the girl you admired, and although Natalie wasn't entirely open with her feelings, she was glad that she swallowed her nervousness and tended to your residual fear of whatever you experienced throughout your slumber.

She wasn't entirely certain what had compelled her to comfort you.

But she didn't regret it.

"Don't worry about it."

Natalie's voice rasped out, and it unconsciously comforted you, as you slowly lifted your head up to meet her eyes. You remembered them being a hazel blue, with the darker azure being the hue that dominated most of her iris. They were comforting to look at, even though the darkness shadowed them. She sent you a small smile, awkward, but attempting to comfort you with the softness she tried to portray. You quirked the corners of your lips up in response to her expression, and when she realized you weren't planning on saying anything, she took the lead as she leaned forward.

"Wanna head outside?" she asked you, "Get some fresh air?"

You inhaled quietly when the warm breath that escaped Natalie's mouth hit your face. She was close, close enough to where if you leaned farther forward, you could touch the tip of your nose with her own. It was as though she were sharing a secret with you. She almost looked up into your eyes, in a way, with the way her body was slightly hunched, just so she could understand how you were feeling based on the micro-expressions that washed over your features. Even though the nightmare still lingered in the back of your mind, haunting you with the memory of what happened, the sudden intimacy in proximity dominated your brain, like fire engulfing an oil puddle.

"That... that sounds nice, yeah."

Your eventual response earned the ghost of a smile from Natalie, before she hiked her knees up to her chest and pushed herself to her feet. Your own eyes followed her as she did so, and it caused your chin to tilt up, just so your gaze could remain connected with her own, even though the light of the world was lackluster. In the span of a few milliseconds, you hesitated to grab her hand when she held it out to you, unsure if you should even bother going outside, but you realized that you were no longer tired, and it was clear that the girl who awaited you wasn't either. She was patient while you mulled over your internal thoughts, but you didn't want her to wait for the rest of her life, so you raised your arm up and allowed her fingers to engulf your palm, hoisting you up to your full height quietly.

The task of you and her sneaking your way out of the cabin came easy. The door clicked softly behind Natalie as she trailed behind you, her eyes focused on you while you lowered yourself down to sit at the ledge of the porch, to the left of the steps that led down to the leveled ground in front of the small building. You had created a gap big enough for her to squeeze into, while your shoulder leaned up against the wooden pole to your left, using it as your own form of leverage. It didn't take long before she eventually came forward to sit down beside you, and she made her presence known with the quiet sigh that escaped her the moment she settled herself onto the wooden deck.

The forest was entirely quiet. The only thing you could hear was the sound of the wind and the occasional coo from an owl, or the distant chirp of a bird. It was... peaceful, considering the circumstances. The ambiance of the nightly hour brought your mind to a calm place. Inhaling the scents that wafted throughout the woods, and feeling the gust of the air that brought a chill down your spine aided you in feeling real. You eventually fluttered your eyes shut and rested your hands against the ledge of the porch, becoming one with the atmosphere you had no choice but to live in.

Natalie turned her head in the slightest, just to take in the sight of your side profile, watching you subtly as you and she sat alone in silence. It wrapped the two of you up like a blanket. It wasn't awkward. There was no need to try and break the mute air with verbal statements and hums of mindless conversation. She let you take the lead here. She didn't want to question you like some sort of detective attempting to solve a mystery. Though she couldn't deny that she wanted to get to know more of you.

She didn't know why she was so curious. Maybe it was because you were the only person here she didn't know anything about. You were the photographer for the Yellowjackets, the team that she played on, yet you were an enigma to her. Shouldn't she have known more about you? She should have befriended you, right? It was what she was obligated to do with the other people on her team. Granted, you only took photos of her and her teammates, but now that you all were stranded in the forest... maybe it would have been a good idea to try and delve deep into who you were as a person.

But she was almost too shy to speak up and take the initiative.

That was unlike her.

"Do you have any smokes?"

When you spoke up, your voice was so sudden to her ears that it caused Natalie to flinch in her spot. She blinked, snapping back into reality, and since she was already staring at you, it only took a simple shift of her pupils to genuinely set her attention on you. You continued to stare out towards nothing in particular, just admiring the rows of trees and the star-covered sky. However, when you didn't get a verbal response from the bleach-blonde beside you, you slowly turned your head to look at her, your eyebrows faintly furrowing in perplexion.

"Nat?"

Hearing you say her name made her stomach flutter, and she quickly cleared her throat before she could dwell on the odd feeling she felt course throughout her body. "Oh, uh... yeah, totally." Surprisingly, she remembered what you were correlating your earlier question to, and so it didn't take her long before she reached into her right pajama pant pocket and tugged out the cardboard pack of cigarettes. It was the first thing she went to grab when she trailed behind you while the two of you first exited the cabin. A joint always managed to calm her down when she was feeling particularly stressed after a nightmare. She was tempted to smoke one when she first woke up from her own, but then she had to deal with Lottie.

And then you.

But it wasn't like she resented either of you for it.

At least she got to indulge now.

"You know how, right?" Natalie asked you, as you mindlessly scooted closer to her, which caused your shoulder and arm to press against her own. She welcomed the touch by ignoring it and pulling out a rolled-up joint from the depths of her carton, and as she shifted the stick into the hand that held the lighter, she closed the lid of her pack and shoved it back into her pocket blindly.

"I only know the stances," you answered sheepishly, after a moment. Your voice came out as a whisper, almost murmuring into the side of her face with the way you leaned down to watch the way her fingers moved.

The warmth of your breath against her skin wasn't something that bothered her, though. Still, she let out an amused huff at your reply to her question. "Stances?" she repeated, all while bringing her joint into her right hand, and allowing her thumb to settle onto the sparkplug of her lighter that sat in her left. "What do you mean by stances?" she asked you, pausing what she was doing to steal a glance at your face.

It was difficult, though, with how dark the world was.

"You know, like..." you shrugged your shoulders subtly and pursed your lips, "when someone smokes, there's like a particular way that they stand and hold their cigarette." You paused to hear her reaction, and when she let out a quiet laugh, you smiled softly, the expression small and one that she couldn't notice, due to the proximity. "I mean, I did say that I wasn't much of a smoker."

"You did," Natalie agreed, remembering a previous – albeit short – conversation between you and her, before she inevitably straightened her posture. It caused you to lean away slightly, as you watched her raise the thinned end of the joint to her lips. And just as they parted, she paused to look at you, silently calling for your undivided attention. "Just – uh... watch how I do it, alright?"

You nodded your head, and with your quiet response, she settled the narrowed tip of the rolled-up piece of paper in her mouth, before she thinned her lips and flicked the spark wheel of her lighter with the pad of her thumb. After the second roll, a short but bright flame emitted from the top of it, and it cast hints of light onto her pale features, as she brought the small fire to the front of her joint.

It didn't seem to take very long before the front of the makeshift cigarette caught the flame. It burned, with a quiet crackle that took away the silence between you and Natalie, and you leaned forward slightly to watch the way she lightly sucked in, inhaling smoke. She pulled the end of the joint out of her mouth shortly after, and the grey cloud of air followed when she parted her lips slightly and blew.

It looked so seamless when she did it.

When Natalie handed the joint over to you, you grabbed it like how she did. With your thumb and index finger. It was small, but it seemed like it packed a punch. You gazed down at the little thing with confusion on your features, and it caused the girl beside you to laugh, as she scooted closer to you and urged you on with her hand coming up to nudge your wrist. "Come on. You don't want to let the weed burn." You flickered your eyes up to meet her own, and she stared at you softly. Even though a hint of amusement remained in her irises, her focus on you made you feel better, and more eager to do as she suggested.

You raised the end of the joint up to your own lips and parted them, before closing them around the same place Natalie had just touched with her own. You didn't know what you were doing, though when you heard her quietly tell you to 'suck,' you obeyed. You felt her hand rest on your knee, just as the smoke invaded your mouth, and she refused to evade her eyes from your own when your pupils dilated. You felt the contaminated air fall down your throat and into your lungs, stinging your insides and staining them with irreparable damage. You made sure to pace yourself, when you gently blew out the small cloud that remained, lowering your chin slightly, just so it didn't hit the blue-eyed girl in front of you.

You felt spacey, as Natalie reached out and gently plucked the joint from between your fingers, her palm still resting on your thigh while her skin brushed against your own. Maybe it was a placebo effect, or maybe whatever was in that smoke worked fast, but you could already feel yourself relaxing, as you distractedly watched her part her lips and take a drag of the makeshift cigarette. She inhaled the smoke as though she was a professional, and you were certain she was, when she exuded the remaining air she had taken in, and sent you a comforting grin. You felt her hand squeeze your leg shortly after, and it caused you to subtly jump in turn, which earned a raspy giggle from her.

"You sure you haven't done that before?" Natalie asked you with a simple raise of her brow. And you grinned softly at her in turn, as you shrugged your shoulders and leaned back on your palms, feeling the wooden grain of the porch below you.

"Pretty... sure."

You slurred your words, which caused Natalie to let out a chuckle.

"You're already high as shit."

And you let out a laugh in response, as your eyes drooped to show your loopiness.

"I know."

But it wasn't a thing that forced you and her to go back inside.

You and Natalie relished in the time alone.

Letting the smoke rise away from your lips, as it acted as an invisible beacon to the sky.

One that nobody was going to see, except you and the girl beside you.

[galedekarios]

Can I ask where the dialogue about gale previously being a professor pre game events is

hello, anon! thank you for the question. the short answer is: there is none!

the longer answer is that as far as we know, he wasn't a professor before the events of the game, but only becomes one in one of his epilogue endings.

we do know gale is a wizard of acclaim and scholar of exceptional accomplishment:

Gale: Let's see. I hail from Waterdeep, the City of Splendours. I'm a wizard of considerable acclaim, and scholar of exceptional accomplishment. I have a cat, a library, and a weakness for a good glass of wine. And if the mood takes me, I'm known to try my hand at poetry. There.

it could mean a number of things of course, we don't exactly know because gale doesn't say what that entails for him, but he likely published works on his research subjects and it's also likely he's worked on spells with tara together since we do know that she invented the 'cat flap of displacement'.

we do also know that gale had pupils prior to the game, but not as a professor:

Player: Do you have much experience being a teacher of magic? I suspect so. Gale: I've had a pupil or two, but never for very long. Their ineptitudes tend to... irk me. Gale: You do seem to be a precocious talent though. I can always tell when I meet with a keen mind receptive to Mystra. Gale: Keep it up and she might just take a personal interest in you one of these days.

again, we know he wasn't a professor or he would've certainly mentioned it in his introduction, as well as it not being such a big part of his epilogue ending, showing his growth and making peace with himself. the way his files frame him becoming a professor also speak against him being so before the game:

This dialogue covers instances where Gale attends the Withers party in a human (non-god) form. His default state is that he returned to Waterdeep and became a professor of Illusory magic at his former school, Blackstaff Academy. General vibe here is that this is a Gale who's found peace with himself - he's a great teacher, one his students are mostly in awe of.

i think it's more likely he either tutored - as that is a very common practise in waterdeep, and even available to the lower classes:

or gale took on a wizard apprentice independently, which... i can sort of see happening. although, it seems he wasn't ready at that point. we can only speculate as to why. perhaps these pupils couldn't keep up with gale, who we do know has a brilliant mind that's always moving, perhaps he wasn't ready yet to take on such a great responsibility while romanticising the idea itself.

what we do know is that he likes sharing knowledge, he wants to impart wisdoms and teachings. not only do we notice that along the journey with gale as a companion, but it's also explicitly a wish revealed by the love test with zethino the dryad:

Zethino: Gale: the learned wizard. The charming gentleman. The walking apocalypse. Zethino: Listen. Think. If the wizard were given the choice, what food would he be? Player: A shiny red apple - wholesome as can be. Gale: Ah, the fruit of scholars. How I long to have a troop of loyal students grace me with apples by the orchard-full in exchange for wisdoms imparted... devnote: Pleased, briefly daydreaming

and that he does grow into his own in the epilogue, through his travels and experiences.

he becomes a great professor, whose students hold him in high regard and whose passion for the position is evident in everything he says during the epilogue.

anyhow, i hope that was helpful! 🖤

[antianakin]

Kind of interesting seeing the divide between people saying ‘it’s not really that anti Jedi, look it’s all one big misunderstanding’ and those who think it is anti Jedi.

Meanwhile, I’ve blocked more people with opinions I don’t want to see on the Jedi in the Acolyte tag since the last episode came out than I had since the first episode. Even if it’s not ‘that’ anti Jedi it’s still enough for people to voice their own critique of the Jedi.

From what I’ve seen, it’s not as bad as I was expecting but it’s bad enough.

I've kind-of talked about this before, but this is why I separate "anti Jedi" and "Jedi critical" as concepts. This show is Jedi CRITICAL, it is not ANTI Jedi.

Anti Jedi, for me, are the people who just sit there and talk about the Jedi like inhuman monsters. It's the fans who insist that the Jedi abused Anakin, kidnapped children, genuinely persecuted other cultures, forbid love of any kind, etc etc. It's the people who genuinely insist that it was a GOOD thing for the Jedi to be murdered in Order 66, that it was NECESSARY because the Jedi were just so so bad and unbalancing everything and this was meant to be or whatever. There is NEVER anything positive at all in anti Jedi stuff, they're just straight up villains basically.

Jedi critical is a range of things, but it tends to be a lot softer and it can even be positive towards the Jedi. There can be Jedi critical MOMENTS in overall Jedi positive stories (see Rebels, Jedi: Fallen Order, and Jedi: Survivor for some pretty good examples of this). This is not a thing that can happen with anti Jedi stuff because it doesn't allow for anything positive about the Jedi to exist. Jedi critical stuff sometimes BELIEVES it's being positive about the Jedi in a "individual Jedi are good people, but the overall organization had issues" way or a "their intentions were good, but they were too old-fashioned and blinded by tradition to realize their good intentions were allowing them to go along with corruption." It's not so much "the Jedi deserved what they got" as much as it is "the Jedi lost their way and caused their own destruction." The Jedi aren't villains here, they're a cautionary tale.

So when fans got worried about Headland's interviews where she explicitly said this would be a Jedi critical story, I think people thought we were worried it would be the FIRST thing. People started to assume that this meant the Acolyte would represent the Jedi as complete and utter monsters and nothing else, so when they ended up a cautionary tale instead, it came off as being like... "not as bad" as expected somehow.

But from what I could tell within my own little circle of internet, the show has ended up EXACTLY what we expected it would be. The Jedi have good intentions and they're not necessarily bad people individually, but there are ABSOLUTELY many many implications that the Jedi as an organization are becoming something negative. They may not INTEND to be a "domineering force in the galaxy," but by working with the Republic, they've allowed themselves to become no more than space cops. They may not INTEND to persecute other groups of Force users, but by being so powerful via their connection to the Republic and allowing themselves to become space cops, it sort-of alienates other groups of Force users by default. They BELIEVE they're doing the right thing and keeping peace in the galaxy, but in truth they're just being rigid and uncompromising. They've begun to allow power to corrupt them into the very thing they claim to fight against.

So, sure, there are elements of this show that end up quite positive towards the Jedi. The characters themselves are clearly intended to be likable and sympathetic, you're clearly supposed to feel sad when those characters were murdered a few episodes ago and that wouldn't be true if the Jedi were being represented as nothing more than villains or monsters. Nobody cried when Palpatine died, after all.

But there are a lot of other elements of this show that imply the Jedi are losing their way, that their connection to the Republic is turning them into a corrupt institution, that their arrogance now (even if the Jedi themselves view it as "nobility") will be what causes their own genocide down the line. There's implications that the Jedi's rules are becoming too strict, that they're allowing themselves to become more emotionally distant, that they're becoming disconnected from the galaxy and its people.

And, personally, I don't like this any more than I would've liked a show that made the Jedi into inhuman monsters. In a lot of ways, Jedi critical stuff is FAR more insidious than anti Jedi stuff. If the Jedi had been represented as just robotic, emotionless monsters, I think a lot of people would've just dismissed it as bad writing and that would've been the end of it. But the reason that "Jedi critical" commentary and interpretations has been so popular for over two decades is because it's COMPELLING and it makes sense to people. The Jedi aren't necessarily all bad, but they're "flawed" and this can feel a lot more relatable than the more canon interpretation that the Jedi are a symbol of compassion and selflessness, they're an example of how you SHOULD act, while ANAKIN is the cautionary tale of what NOT to do.

Both anti Jedi and Jedi critical interpretations basically flip the point of the story on its head by taking a message meant for someone else and applying it to the Jedi instead. With the anti Jedi interpretation, they're just taking Palpatine's story and giving it to the Jedi ("they're the REAL villains"), while the Jedi critical interpretation takes Anakin and the Senate's story and gives it to the Jedi ("they had good intentions, they lost themselves to fear, they let power corrupt them into the thing they claimed to fight against, etc").

So while Jedi critical stories can often COME OFF as better than anti Jedi stories because they seem to allow more room for positivity towards the Jedi, they're often not so different. "They all deserved to die" and "They may not have deserved it, but they caused it with their own arrogance" don't end up feeling all that different in their negativity to me most of the time.

The primary difference to me is that Jedi criticism exists in a RANGE, while anti Jedi stuff does not. Jedi criticism can be as small as one line out of four seasons' worth of positive content in Rebels implying that the Jedi made a mistake by going to war but never truly blaming the Jedi for their own genocide, or as big as shows like the Ahsoka show and the Acolyte straight-up blaming the Jedi for their own genocide and condemning them as weak failures who became corrupted by power and elitism.

It's a lot easier to listen to Jedi critical arguments and think "hey, maybe they have a point, this sounds reasonable and it's coming from someone I trust, so it must be true." And then it escalates. It goes from "Maybe the Jedi were a little complacent and old-fashioned" to "The Jedi were so arrogant that they didn't even do anything to try to save themselves because it would've meant changing some of their traditions" to "The Jedi Order completely lost their way and were ruining the galaxy and needed to be destroyed for the sake of balance." And you can see just how quickly a little bit of softer Jedi criticism can lead to genocide apologia. And most of the people who make those arguments will INSIST that it's not genocide apologia, they might even insist that they actually do LOVE the Jedi and find them really cool and fun and interesting. But they'll also turn around and, in the same breath, say that the Jedi brought their destruction upon themselves. You can see how Jedi criticism can grow, like a mold.

So, sure, maybe The Acolyte isn't as bad as some people were expecting because when they heard people getting worried about Jedi criticism, they thought it meant "the Jedi will be represented as nothing but murderous, inhuman monsters" and what we're getting seems, on the surface, to be better than that. Maybe for some people, it is. For some people, they're able to pick out like 20% of this show and just throw away the other 80% in order to just enjoy the characters. For some people, they're able to just rewrite the show in their heads to pretend it's less critical than it is. For some people, the fact that the show is badly written enough to feel contradictory sometimes means that the Jedi critical stuff doesn't seem so bad.

Some people are a LOT more tolerant of this kind of stuff than I am or just want to enjoy pretty much any Star Wars content that exists enough that they're willing to do extra work to find ways to enjoy it. Personally, this is EXACTLY as bad as I thought it would be, and I see no need to try to pretend this show is something it isn't in order to force myself to find something in it that's enjoyable to me. I'm willing to do that work only if that ratio is flipped and there's 80% of the show that's already enjoyable on its own and 20% that's a little off.

I'll just be glad when it's finally over and we can stop talking about it and let it disappear into nothing the way the Ahsoka show seems to have done.

[prettysweetprettysweet]

while i understand why some viewers would be puzzled by Achi's quietness, reserved energy, and the way he nearly always lets Karan take the lead - which might make it seem like he isn't invested in the relationship - for me that is actually an element I really like because it makes certain moments hit a lot harder.

the way I've been interpreting it is that Achi's critical insecurity and lack of self-worth is still deeply rooted and trying to keep him stuck in his default closed off/blend into your environment behavior model. that is certainly not going to go away overnight, but the more he interacts with Karan in this new romantic relationship context, the more opportunity Karan has to start chipping away at the barrier that keeps Achi from letting himself feel comfortable in a state of being loved. and it seems like a challenge that Karan is more than happy to take on, because you can see how giddy he gets when he's able to get a full-bodied positive reaction out of Achi. like when Karan said, cheezily and with an air of ridiculousness, that he had opened the bottle for Achi so Achi wouldn't wear himself out.

like Karan is RELISHING having elicited this wide, full-faced smile out of Achi.

we also saw Achi being treated like an object of beauty as Karan poses him for photos. he's being handled preciously by Karan, and for me this read as 'aaaaaahhhhhh my heart is racing i cant breathe, i've never felt like this before, i love this feeling.' It's a quiet and inward-facing response, but it has a huge amount of significance in regards to Achi's self-image. He is realizing through all of Karan's careful and loving gestures and affectionate gazes that he is beautiful in Karan's eyes - and he's starting to believe it himself, helping him build the confidence to begin responding fully to Karan and extending himself in turn.

We can estimate that Achi has probably never been comfortable with photo taking because he is so self-conscious about his body, and it takes the first half of the date for him to loosen up. but later on when Karan asks Achi if he would be interested in being photographed even more to fill the time before dinner, Achi agrees readily and with a smile, because he has become that comfortable in Karan's company. and Karan, again, is delighted at this slow but steady change in Achi's receptiveness to being loved and adored.

It does seem like Achi isn't vocalizing his feelings nearly as much as Karan. But remember - most of Karan's deepest, most intense romantic pinings have occurred in his thoughts and not out loud, because he's very concerned with Achi's comfort and doesn't want to scare or overwhelm him. Karan is open with his body language and more than comfortable offering signs of his care and affection, a stark contrast to Achi.

Achi, on the other hand, hasn't quite let himself believe that he's worthy of Karan's love and instead seems to think that Karan has made a horrible mistake. This is changing, and we are starting to see how Achi is slowly letting himself believe that this is real and that Karan knows who he is and is in love with him, the real him - and this naturally leads Achi to start viewing himself as a lovable person.

But one side effect of Achi having spent so long doubting Karan's affection for him is that he seems to have tried to squash any hope he might have inside him that anything good could happen to him, that he could really have a claim to Karan and Karan a claim to him. This is an act of self-preservation, in case Karan 'comes to his senses' and realizes that Achi is actually boring, unremarkable, and unworthy of being cared for by anyone.

So when Achi starts to let hope seep in, it really is precious. in episode 7, he expresses genuine fear about revealing his mindreading to Karan - because the outcome could likely be that Karan will be put off and not want to be around Achi anymore. he and Karan had reached a point of promise and new beginnings (love! hope!), and Achi doesn't want to risk losing Karan as a lover.

Achi also had a moment of real vulnerability this episode, when he tells Tanaka that Karan's support has been a source of motivation for him to continue striving for self-growth. Achi's eyes are welling with emotion, and Karan definitely wasn't expecting an admission like this from Achi.

Achi is visibly having a rough time in the meeting with Tanaka, and reacts with a look of panic when Tanaka asks what would happen if he and Karan broke up, as well as when Karan offered to resign.

Achi had allowed himself to feel hope at the prospect of having Karan be a part of his life, and is starting to panic as complications threaten their ability to start laying a foundation for their relationship in earnest. He's racking his brain for ways to help Karan, covering his eyes as he builds himself up to look at Karan's sales number like its a horror film, and checking in with him/worrying about Karan non-stop.

Favorite moment of the episode: Karan being as explicit as he's ever been about his romantic aspirations ("No obstacles can come between our love now") and Achi looking like he feels like the most special boy in the universe, UNDENIABLY very excited to hear it but also embarrassed - and Karan is so tickled to have gotten that reaction from him.

The episode ends with Achi singing along with the song in Karan's head and being adorably playful when Karan brings him candy. I feel like Achi is a stray cat that Karan is trying to tame, except in this case Achi's feral quality is his insecurity hindering outward expression and Karan is 'taming' him by providing him the comfort and safety to be himself. Every time Karan wins a moment of Achi allowing his true feelings and personality to shine through, I think of someone being like 'mom, the cat I've been trying to win over - he's coming up to sniff my hand now!'

Something to be excited about in next week's episode based on the preview: they have clearly broken through the physical affection barrier. Ecstatic hugs, heads in laps, holding hands in bed, piggy back rides...Achi is going to further permit himself to feel and want things and indulge those wants, and also give Karan affection in return, showing that he is just as happy to be with Karan as Karan is to be with him, and just as invested in the future of their love story. While its been a journey mixed with slow and subtle growth, I really do love and appreciate how the narrative is allowing Achi the time and space to transform how he views himself and how that translates to his relationship with Karan.

more thoughts here

[mothwingwritings]

R & Y for baki please <3 it can be mixed

Thank yooou! Here's some love for our titular boy loool <3

Warnings: Mentions of confinement, being held against your will, and one sided affection

Regret: Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let their darling go?

In moments of lucidity, Baki would feel very guilty. What right did he have to pluck you up off the street and hold you against your will? He’s forced you into confinement like you were some kind of criminal, turning your life upside down. It was selfish, it was cruel, and it robbed you of everything and everyone you loved in your life. He was your world now, and even though he earnestly felt that was for the best and knew he loved you more than any other human possibly could, he also knew how lonely this confinement made you. Every time he saw that sad look in your eyes, your body slumped over in dejection and fear as you sat in the corner of his barren room refusing to speak with him, it broke his heart. You were his shining, vibrant, brilliant love and he alone had made you lose your luster.

Deep down he knew he just was chasing after a phantom feeling of affection, the dream of having a loving and doting partner by his side spurring him to do something outrageous. He was disappointed in himself, disgusted for having betrayed your trust. Any positive bond he had formed with you was certainly destroyed at this point, any actual love you felt for him has gone clear out the window. When he gets into these guilt-ridden spirals he wonders if it was all worth it, if potentially demolishing the once natural attachment you shared with him was something that was truly necessary or desired by him. It eats him up more than he will ever let on, he never wanted to be the villain in your life.

However, it’s only a matter of time before he reverts to his default mindset and realizes that there is no reason to be beating himself up over all this. You may be upset or momentarily hurt, but in the end he did this for your own benefit. He is protecting you and providing for you in ways no one else can, he’ll never let any misfortune befall you as long as you are at his side. True, maybe his home isn’t the most spacious or as clean as it could be, but its world’s better then leaving you to fend for yourself on the outside. He’ll always strive to make your life better, even if you can’t necessarily see that that’s what is happening.

He loves you with all that he is, so even if it hurts or confuses you in the process, it will all be worth it in the end. When you finally realize how well off you are none of the grievances of the present will matter any longer. Your future with him is bright and full of happiness, how can it not be when he is pouring so much of himself into providing you an ideal life?

He just has to keep telling himself that until that day arrives.

As far as letting you go, I think after a lot of time and discussion Baki would be willing to let you go once he truly understands it’s in your best interest. When it comes down to it, he really does love you and want your happiness, so after an extended amount of time if his methods continue to not work, or make you actively worse, he will bite the bullet and do what’s best for you. It will be the hardest choice he has ever had to make, but he wouldn’t be able to live with himself if you lost yourself entirely due to his greed and infatuation. He’ll always cling on to hope though, saving himself for you so that one day in the future you may come back ready to give him another chance, this time of your own accord.

Yearn: How long do they pine after their darling before they snap?

Your relationship with Baki actually starts off pretty normal. You met, became good acquaintances, which led to friendship and then blossomed into him becoming one of your best friends. At some point in that time frame, it struck him that while he loved your companionship and affection as his close confidant and buddy, he wanted, or rather needed something much more than that with you.

Baki is a pretty patient person, but the moment he realizes his feelings for you run deeper than just mere friendship, it’s over.  The second he comes to terms with just how deeply he cares for you he becomes obsessed with making you aware of it, unable to contain his unbridled excitement over the revelation. It’s all so exhilarating and intoxicating, and he just knows the instant he tells you you’ll be thrilled too. He loves you so deeply, so fully, how did he not realize this sooner? You two are meant to be together, literally made for each other, he was blind not to see what was before him! You were veritable soul mates, and that thought flooded his chest with butterflies, made his stomach do flips. Maybe he was the only one out of the loop, he wondered if you had long since realized this and were just patiently waiting for Baki to make a move? How embarrassing, he’ll have to make it up tenfold as soon as he sees you.

So he rushes to you and wastes no time confessing, ardent feelings gushing from within him as he bares his heart for you in a torrent of flowery words, barely able to catch his breath as he goes on and on, making sure to leave nothing unsaid. He’s expecting you to respond with a smile, or maybe even happy tears or an embarrassed little blush, but you just… stare at him. There’s no pleased grin that lights up your face, no playful chiding over how long it took him to catch on and confess, no enveloping hug as you leap into his arms in sheer joy. You just looked at him blankly until you eventually avert your gaze, awkwardly focusing anywhere but him as you apologize, telling him you only saw him as your dear friend and nothing more.

Oh.

THIS is the only time he truly pines.

He tried to accept it, really he did, but damned if it wasn’t hard. And things were so… weird after his confession. You kept your distance, dodging any physical contact Baki tried to give you. You didn’t smile at him like you used to, or joke around with him till the wee hours of the morning. You always loved his hugs, but now you shrank away from them, denying him the pleasure of feeling your warm, inviting body against his own. And as more time passed, he saw less and less of you overall, his hang out requests always responded to with convenient flimsy excuses.

He ached for you. His body, his soul, every part of him yearned for you, desperately craving your attention and affection. Your absence was profound and painful and after a solid three weeks had passed without any response to him or you reaching out once, he knew he had to take matters into his own hands.

Baki didn’t blame you for your behavior. How he went about his confession was all wrong, and in the end, it ended up unnerving you a bit. He just got too excited and worked up over the thought of becoming official with you, but he realized now how he was far too eager in his execution. Just like how your bond formed originally, you needed time to get used to him not just as Baki your friend, but Baki your lover. And the best way to do that was to give you plenty of time alone together, with no outside distractions to interrupt you.

He spent a long time getting his home ready for your arrival. Your favorite snacks filled his pantry, a new toothbrush ready and waiting for you in the bathroom. He even bought you some new clothes he knows will look adorable on you (as well as some underwear/lingerie he’s very much looking forward to seeing you in) and some books/magazines/games to keep you entertained. It’s going to be great-just the two of you hanging out, getting to know each other in a whole new light, which will grant you the time to realize your true feelings. Spending so much time together in such close corners is a sure fire way to ignite the flames of passion within you, right? There’s no way your dormant feelings of love won’t be aroused by your new living situation.

Just thinking about it was getting him excited all over again.

[tobi-smp]

you know, I think the thing that made c!phil's writing kind of janky and discordant is Also exactly what makes cc!phil's Strength as a roleplayer

the best way to put it is that phil is the epitome of Yes And. wilbur tells him to kill him and it was a Choice, there was no script that told him that wilbur Had to die that night. but wilbur asked him to and so he did.

wilbur Also asked him to look after tubbo and tommy, So He Did. he fought for l'manberg on the 16th (fought Against dream and techno), and agreed to become a part of l'manberg's government as a mentor figure.

but techno was his friend and they wanted to spend time together when they were online so why be anything else in lore? of Course they're old friends, of Course they spend time together.

the problem arise when there's Conflict between these two groups. because phil Must choose what to do and say and believe at any given moment, to justify Why he would choose to do whatever it he is about to do. but at the end of the day that choice Mostly comes down to what would be cool or fun or interesting in the moment.

and I think ! that there's absolutely nothing wrong with this, and it's actually a Really good mindset to have in the context of this kind of roleplay. and it worked really well early on. it's Interesting that phil Would have a completely uncomplicatedly loyal relationship with techno right away when he Did explicitly stand against him on that first day. it Says Something about their relationship. maybe even implies that they've fought each other before, but it doesn't impact their relationship with each other.

the problem is when it starts contradicting and Twisting and being weird. mainly when it comes to characters that he Both has major conflict with And want to have a positive relationship with him. it becomes a question of Why phil would do something that would hurt them if he cares about them.

after all, it's not just hurt feelings, it's war. even if they had no Intent on killing anybody, it still Could Have ended with people dead.

and again ! that's not an inherently Bad Thing. it actually opens to the door for a lot of interesting character conflict and introspection !

phil is a Very old being, his best friend is famous for being unkillable, his wife is Actually Death who casually possesses him sometimes. having phil be somewhat out of touch with humanity in a way where he doesn't Really understand the emotional weight and Danger of what he's done would make sense ! and of course, that's just one possible explanation that could be replaced with or coincide with another reading.

but it's all complicated Further by there being a very strong ideological bend to the conflicts he's involved with. because it Feels like for him to engage with said conflict Meaningfully he must weigh in with his own take on the ideological conflicts. he's playing a supporting role to technoblade after all, and on paper his entire character Is one big ideological conflict.

but what phil's ideology actually Is shifts to suit whatever story line he needs to support at a given moment, rather than being set in stone First with his role in those story lines being chosen based on a preexisting belief.

and honestly I really Don't blame cc!phil for this, because On Paper the jump in justification for these supporting roles he's played don't look very different. and in fact, you can See where one follows the conclusion to another.

but "choose people" above all else, to the point of being Shocked that tommy might hesitate in the conflict with dream that has the weight of protecting the entire server riding on it, really Does Not gel with whatever happened on doomsday or with letting dream out of prison.

moreover, it only highlights a conflict in ideology between phil and techno. the use of violence as default Even Against active allies or people who'd been considered allies 5 minutes ago doesn't seem to gel with whatever phil had going on in the post-prison break out era.

having phil enable dream to torment tommy during doomsday feels very contradictory to phil's shocked offense that dream would torment A Child the first chance he got after breaking out.

and again ! none of this is inherently a Flaw, it could all be very interesting as set ups for character conflict and as an examination for phil's Own character flaws. having contradictions like this isn't inherently Bad writing when it can so easily be Interesting. open up the door for Richer character writing.

the problem isn't even that none of this was intentional at the time that it was happening, but rather that nobody really seemed to notice it at all. so rather than it being used as a tool to bounce off of For that character examination and conflict. it just kinda. Is.

I think ! what phil needed, and what the server As A Whole needed, was stronger Direction. it's what made the early arcs work as well as they did, because Everyone knew the what the core story Was and could figure out ways to cohesively bounce off of them.

the revolution, the elections, the civil war, they were all Strong skeletons with clear factions and ideologies at play. and so even when people were doing their own things it all Felt Cohesive.

and of course, the dream smp Stopped having a key writer for the those big plot moments with the intent of giving people more personal freedom in their writing. but I think it only served a Lack Of Identity. people who didn't already have a stake in the key conflicts that were already on the server struggled to find their way into them. and struggled to find relevancy Without them.

and I think this was felt the most in the way that people were both afraid of stepping on anybody's toes while Also getting in each other's way like a football field.

like, I Loved tommy's death and resurrection arc. and the sheer Surprise of it and the aftermath was truly incredible to see.

but it was also Weird that people weren't given the chance to react to it on their own terms. like, why did they plan the syndicate meeting months in advance just to have it dropped on them with no way to prepare for or modulate their responses?

phil and techno's reactions to tommy's death are So Weird when we consider their relationship with him both before And After. and it's difficult to reconcile because it's Understandable that the cc's didn't want to derail their planned lore to make it About tommy's story line. But It's Not Like We Can Pretend It Didn't Happen Either.

and there's lots of ways that people have tried to reconcile this, lots of ways that I've even personally Enjoyed. but in terms of what's actually In the source material It Just Kind Of Is.

phil cares about tommy, he wants to guide him and protect him because he recognizes that he's a child in a dangerous position, but he also laughs when he hears dream beat him to death in prison and he also laughed while dropping bombs on tommy's head with dream at his side. and these all just kind of Are.

I can't even tell if this is all weirder before or after canon sbi was retconned.

and so these inconsistencies tug at all of the major story beats that phil's character is involved with, all while all of them Mostly work well in isolation. and it's so easy to see how this could've been avoided with stronger direction and story planning.

in other words, It's Dream's Fault.

[sunshine-for-serotonin]

NSFW alphabet eyeless jackk. Plsss im begging

But of course darlin’ ;)

NSFW Alphabet: Eyeless Jack

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex):

VERY ATTENTIVE! Jack is waiting on you hand and foot. He has water and your favorite snacks, and yes, you will be eating and drinking something! Jacks a former med student (Y/N), he knows what is needed for you to replenish yourself.

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Jacks favorite body part of himself is his mouth. He has pretty lips and he knows it, in-fact, it’s one of the few things he’s not self conscious about. Besides, what’s better than making you scream his name while he tastes every intimate inch of you?

His favorite body part of yours is your stomach. It doesn’t matter if you’re skinny, chubby, buff, or even midsize, Jack has a hand on your stomach at almost all times. It’s one of the best places for leaving hickeys in his opinion, with the addition he often daydreams about you becoming pregnant, if you’re able too. In fact, when he’s feeling clingy he often presses his head to your stomach as soft and content demonic purring emanates from him.

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

Jack likes cuming inside you more than anything, but if he has to elsewhere, his second favorite place is on your stomach.

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Clothing stealer, no, you cannot change my mind. Jack takes dirty clothes from your laundry basket and will scatter them on his bed whenever he can’t be with you (Rarely, but still). Probably someone who will cut up your clothes to make them fit if he’s really desperate. Jack also scent marks your clothes, and sometimes seeing you wear his clothes is enough for his more demonic instincts to take over. Translation: wearing his clothes is going to get you fucked within an inch of your life, and him wearing your clothes is an invitation to do the same to him.

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

Little to no experience. Jack was always too busy with his studies to really pursue a relation ship, and look what happened to him when he finally found the time. However, that doesn’t mean he’s completely clueless. Let’s just say he knows how to put those anatomy classes to work~

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)

Any position where he can see your face, though Jack often defaults to missionary, or cowgirl when he wants you to lead.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

Jack is definitely serious about everything, the closest to humor you will get out of him is gentle teasing, or lightly taunting you when he’s subbing.

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

He has an average amount of hair down there, but he shaves or trims regularly. Jack has a surprisingly light happy trail though.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…) 

A hopeless romantic through and through, Jack wants to make your experience like something out of a movie. The only exception to this rule is when his demonic side takes over, but even then there’s a surplus of heartfelt kisses and closeness.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

Surprisingly mild sex drive, unless he’s in rut, so he’s usually able to hold off touching himself until you’re ready to actually have sex with him. But if he can’t, he’s in your room and buried in your blankets and scent, craving your presence while he fucks his hand.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Breeding kink all the way, it’s his way of marking you up and making sure any other creature can smell him on you so they know your his.

On that note, marking kink. Jack loves to give as well as receive hickeys.

He loves it when you bite him!!!! Jack has a high pain tolerance, so don’t be afraid of being rough with him.

Finally, and maybe most shocking, hair pulling kink. Not for you though, for him. It doesn’t matter if he’s dominating or subbing, pulling his hair is a one way ticket to getting him riled up for you.

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

His bedroom, Jacks possessive by nature, so to have you in his room, in his bed, completely surrounded by him, is all he could ever want and more.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

WEARING HIS CLOTHES

showing your stomach

thigh highs (especially on bigger girls)

you just in general tbh

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Will not degrade you, does

not want degradation,

do not tie him up, it triggers flashbacks!!!!

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

Prefers to give, he has three tongues for a reason, darling. Jack’s not that good at it at first, but he’s very observant towards your body language and verbal reactions, so he learns quick.

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

If he’s in rut? You’re not walking for days.

Anytime outside of that? So soft and romantic it almost hurts.

If you’re in charge he likes it rough though-

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

Jack likes true sex much more than quickies, once again, the only exception is when he’s in rut, and even then he still always takes the proper time to prep you.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

No risks, he doesn’t want to even think about accidentally hurting you, and the thought of another being seeing you like this makes him bloodthirsty.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

Jack can go for about twelve rounds at a normal time, and he can go for an entire day when in rut. He lasts about as long as an average adult male, but his stamina makes up for it.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

Jack owns toys for you, but not for him. He likes to watch you use them to tease him and test his self restraint.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Surprisingly very little, and it usually only happens when you get him worked up.

He does have quite the mouth when he’s subbing though, but you can shut him up with kisses so it’s okay.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

Kind of quiet in volume, but he makes an ungodly amount of noises. Moaning, grunting, purring? He’s got all the bases covered and he’s not afraid to let you hear them.

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

Definitely has watched you sleep several times, but the knowledge that you trust him and feel so relaxed around him makes him horny, so a lot of the time he masturbates while your asleep next to him.

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

BIG. At least ten inches and he’s girthy. Jacks testicles are a slightly darker grey than the rest of his body, and his shaft is the same color. His head is lighter than his body tone though, and has a more pronounced mushroom shape than most. He has prominent veins too.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

Pretty mild usually, but when he’s aroused he’s aroused.

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Jack usually stays up watching you actually, if he sleeps he’ll probably drift off in about an hour.

[msexcelfractal]

get rid of the idea of “correct”. Correct doesn’t exist outside of pure mathematics. Models of the world can be useful or predictive, they cannot be correct. [Ways to do things] can be effective, efficient, sustainable, or pro-social, they cannot be correct. there is always another way to do things.

Moral ideologies are human attempts to build structures that lubricate and protect social interaction. the ideologies that have lasted are the ones that were engineered to last. there is no correct moral ideology.

in your situation, you can only ask: what will happen? what do i want to have happen? can i sustain this effort?

it’s true that some people surrender their free choice to a system. they only ask, “what does the system say i should do?” These people tend to become stupid. they lose the ability to see the nuance in the world that exists below the resolution of their system. there are patterns their system describes well, and patterns it describes poorly. they have little insight regarding the latter. if you have ever argued with someone and asked, “how can you refuse to engage with my argument? how can you not understand me?”, you have probably met one of these people.

you are one of these people. so am i. it is the nascent culture of our world and the default position we each inherit. the only cure is to live with it. notice when your system makes an unusually poor prediction and ask, what is beyond it?

[likesomanywrecksdo]

SPOILERSSSSSS FOR FULL MOON (HELLUVA BOSS S2 EP8)!!! DON'T READ IF U HAVEN'T WATCHED PLSSS

STOLITZ PART 2/2- BLITZØ IN FULL MOON

Blitzø's behaviour in Full Moon seemed very similar to the five stages of grief, mostly denial, anger and bargaining because depression and acceptance don't usually happen in the heat of the moment. Also these stages don't happen in order, they are all over the place.

Denial, when Blitzø thought it was all roleplay and that Stolas actually didn't care about him and was just messing around for the sake of the deal. This reaction happens even after Stolas' sweet love confession and you can tell Blitzø wants to believe it but denial is the easiest bet. In Blitzø's mind, Stolas has not done anything apart from tonight to suggest he cares about anything other than their deal so Blitzø can't risk becoming vunerable when the possibility that this is a joke is there. So he has to keep denying everything and then maybe everything will go back to normal and comfortable. We also have to take into consideration that at this point in the episode, Blitzø had it floating around in his head that Stolas is getting bored of him. So the idea that Stolas is not bored, but in fact in love is impossible to Blitzø, causing him to justify everything as a joke.

Bargaining was Blitzø initial reaction to when Stolas said; "i need it back permanently". First he tried to remain the way he always was at their full moon meetings; put together and dominating to try and get some normalcy back because the last time Blitzø wanted the book, this is how he got it, so naturally he would resort to that sort of bargaining as a way of getting the book again and distracting Stolas from talking about the issues within their relationship. Then he switches to plain begging. Blitzø has come to terms with the fact that he is beneath Stolas and when Stolas says "i've made up my mind", Blitzø brain goes into panic mode and we see him literally the most vulnerable he has ever been with Stolas in the entire series. Blitzø is someone who does not like when he isn't in positions of power but he is willing to forgo all that if it means he gets this book.

Anger is familiar to Blitzø. He understand anger very well, so when he is backed against this wall and is confused as fuck about all the information that has been dropped on him in one night, he retreats to something more comfortable. The thing is, this isn't real anger he's showing, Blitzø use the volume of his voice to hide the real message. Stolas is literally walking away from this conversation, if Blitzø didn't care, he wouldn't run after him at all. The thing is, Blitzø is yelling for more time. He's asking Stolas to let him think and process and not give up on him but Stolas isn't listening to him so he feels like at least if he screams, Stolas might scream back. This is also something that is similar to Stolas too. Stella yells and screams at him to make him feel small, which is why his decision to teleport Blitzø out of his castle came into play, but Blitzø doesn't know that, making him justify his anger further.

Now that we've covered the three stages of grief, why is Blitzø falling into this pattern of grief coping mechanism in the first place.

Because Blitzø hates himself and thinks he's unworthy of love from anyone. He jumps to conclusions way too often, it's how his brain functions. So when Stolas cuts off the deal, his brain defaults to his regular coping mechanism to deal with the thought of losing Stolas.

[txttletale]

So I'm a leftist because I can plainly see that capitalism sucks, but I have a really hard time pinning down what I think we should replace it with because I have "agrees with the last theory I read" disease. (Or, more embarrassingly, "agrees with the last Post I read.")

Something I've been wondering about recently is what's the point of planning and arguing over what happens after the revolution anyway? The chances of a successful worker's revolution in my lifetime, let alone the next few decades, feels vanishingly small. The preconditions just feel so far away.

Is there really value in committing to a specific ideology right now, or is it sufficient to say the anarchist future and the ML future (and even, like, the DemSoc future) sound better than what we have now, and require many of the same preconditions, so let's work towards those shared goals now and figure out what comes after in a few decades when the groundwork is actually laid?

i agree with you that i don't think a genuine revolutionary situation will arise (at least, not in the imperial core) within our lifetimes. i also agree that there is a meaningful degree to which the theoretical differences between marxist-leninists & anarchists are far enough from being present and pressing concerns that they should in almost all cases be working together and employing similar tactics and action.

however, i do think there is a value to having an ideological framework: it keeps you consistent. if your ideology is vague and empty, you're liable to (intentional or unintentional) opportunism--you will fill in the gaps or approach new ideas with the default positions, the ones that require the least divergence from hegemonic cultural norms and values.

that sounds a bit ideological-jargony so i'll phrase it another way: if you grow up in a [joker voice] society, you're going to grow up with a lot of assumptions! like, 'cops reduce crime', for example. and if you don't have an underlying theory of capitalist society and how it functions, then it's entirely possible to realize (through experience or analysis) that capitalism is bad and that our society is inherently unjust, but continue thinking 'cops reduce crime' because that's just the default cultural position you grew up with. these two things are pretty impossible to reconcile, right--because of course the actual purpose of cops is to enforce private property rights and maintain the capitalist system of economic relations--but if you don't have a full theoretical framework of capitalism & society that you can use to analyse things, that incoherence is very easy to let slip by!

i also want to say that while i think that anarchists & marxist-leninists (and all other revolutionary) communists share common goals and functionally very similar political projects for our forseeable lifetime, there is a meaningful difference between these two and the 'demsocs' you mentioned. not an uncrossable gulf by any means in terms of working together and forging political alliances--but the steps one takes to agitate and organize the working class in anticipation of a future revolutionary situation, however distant, are imo very functionally different to the steps one takes to advocate for social reform within liberal legislatures. rosa luxemburg put it well when she said there is nothing reformist about supporting trade unions, welfare legislation, as a vehicle for revolutionary class struggle--but when you take these things as ends themselves, i.e., as viable methods for resolving the contradictions of capitalism, you become unable to use them as such a vehicle.

but, yeah. tldr; i think it is far from the most important thing (the most important thing is to be a principled anti-capitalist & anti-imperialist--these are the two litmus tests for whom i can consider a political ally), but it is useful to have an underlying political framework rather than a collection of individual positions, because the latter can lead to contradictory and self-defeating worldviews and political programs

[theamityelf]

Okay, so as a continuation of my Hinaegi posts, in the scenario where Hajime and Makoto date at Hope's Peak and then Hajime becomes Kamukura...

I feel like a Kamukura who falls in love with Makoto separately from Hajime, who doesn't remember being Hajime or knowing Makoto as Hajime or being known by Makoto as Hajime, would very much feel like he's just a different guy who is using Makoto's love for Hajime to keep him close.

Like, whether you agree that Izuru is inherently a different human being from Hajime or consider him just Hajime who has undergone drastic alterations, he would pretty much definitely see it as, "How convenient that the guy I like/want happens to have preexisting romantic feelings for the person this body used to belong to." He doesn't correct Makoto when he calls him Hajime, he refers to their relationship as if it started when he was Hajime, and from his perspective, he is lying about these things. From his perspective, Makoto's ex-boyfriend is dead and he is moving into a vacancy that happens to be the right shape, exploiting a vulnerability in someone who deeply interests him.

And eventually, once the highly pragmatic mindset he acquired in the Kamukura Project starts to wear thin just from socializing more, he starts to feel bad about it. He feels guilty that Makoto thinks he's still dating Hajime. Oh, Makoto already knows that he doesn't have memories from before; there's no way for them to have talked for any length of time at the beginning and not established that. But Makoto still considers him Hajime; just Hajime with amnesia, fresh trauma, and a wild amount of sudden skillsets (the details of which have not been explained to him). He has to build up his courage (and, like, moral inclination) to explain to Makoto that the Kamukura Project wasn't just a thing that took away his memories; he is a different human. He is not Hajime. Hajime is dead, and now Izuru is here in his place. In his body.

He expects Makoto to break over this, or fight back, but Makoto just thinks for a few seconds and gently asks, "Would you prefer it if I call you Izuru now?"

Kamukura is all, You don't understand, it's not just a name change, I am Different.

Makoto says, "I understand that you're different. Hajime...didn't like the rain. And Hajime hated to sleep in his uniform. Hajime had a way lower tolerance for spicy foods, and he took his showers in the morning instead of at night. He got shy more easily, and he hugged differently, and it took him more tries to get things right. Maybe you can't be Hajime anymore. But you're still the person I care about."

Izuru frowns, unsure if he should take this response or keep pushing back.

"I know you don't remember, but...you stand like Hajime. I mean, the way you angle your feet when you're standing still is like him."

Izuru looked down at his feet. In ballet, it would be partway between third and fourth position.

"The TV channel you use for background noise...it was Hajime's favorite."

It wasn't like he enjoyed the shows. They were just...more enriching than silence. And he defaulted to the same channel out of routine.

"And the way you've looked for the past few days, like you needed to say something but you were scared to...It's the same way Hajime looked before he told me I could be dating an Ultimate instead."

Izuru doesn't know what to say.

"I'm not telling you who you are. You are whoever you believe you are. But...I don't believe Hajime is dead." Makoto strokes Izuru's hair, drawing him to rest his head on his shoulder. Izuru curls his arms around him, inhaling deeply. "All that talent, and you're still trying to convince me I shouldn't care about you?"

Hajime cries.

[just-another-josh]

Maroon

“You ARE using Myriad.”

“Lena, what are you doing here?”

“Question is, what are you doing here, Supergirl? I thought it was forbidden to use Myriad but forbidden for anyone but you.”

“There are people missing, dozens of them stuck in Obsidian's VR. I have to find them.”

“There are other ways to find people than Myriad. I can think of four off the top of my head, but you, you do what you want.”

“What I'm doing is finding people your brother disappeared.”

“Do you have any proof that it was Lex…no, I didn't think so. You just return to your default position of blaming a Luthor. You did tell me you'd treat me like a villain.”

“If you acted like one, yeah, I did say that. And right now, you're trespassing, and I don't have time for this. You need to go.”

“I'll leave when you stop using Myriad.”

“That's not gonna happen.”

“To think that I was sincere with you yesterday. Then I guess you're used to being two-faced.”

Kara stared blankly at the ceiling. When she arrived home, she hadn’t even bothered to get out of her Super-suit. She skipped her fridge, her appetite nonexistent. Hell, she hadn’t even bothered to turn the lights on, instead opting to faceplant into her bed.

It had been a miserable day…. scratch that, an exceptionally miserable day.

Now, mind you, not the worst day of her life; that distinguished honor belonged solely to the day she watched her planet die. Today wasn’t worse than the day Astra died, or the day Reign beat her into a coma, or the day she watched an antimatter wave destroy Argo (yes, it was later restored, but she didn’t know that at the time). 

No, today’s suffering ranked somewhere between dating Mon-El and Alex having her memories of Kara’s secret identity removed, less about death and destruction and more about emotional damage.

It all started yesterday: Lena had come to her office and offered her condolences regarding Jeremiah’s death, even going so far as to provide her a copy of “Going On Being” to help her through the grieving process. It was an emotional albeit awkward exchange, but it was the first time since Lena had stolen Myriad that the two of them had spoken without any underlying hostility. It was the first time Kara had seen a glimmer of the old Lena; with all the warmth, kindness, and compassion that she knew her former best friend once felt toward her. There was no sign of hate or malice in her voice, just sympathy and understanding.

Rao, she even called her ‘Kara’.

It gave Kara hope. Hope that maybe this was Lena’s way of offering an olive branch. Hope that things weren’t so far gone between them that they couldn’t mend the bridge that had been razed by their lies. More importantly, hope that Kara could reveal to Lena all the other secrets that the CEO was still unaware of.

Unfortunately, today’s encounters with Lex, the Morae, the baby Sun-Eater, and Lena’s impromptu visit to the Fortress of Solitude had laid waste to Kara’s burgeoning hope.

If Kara was being honest with herself, the issues with Lex, the Morae, and Kal’s pet Sun-Eater (they were going to have a very long, unpleasant conversation about that the next time she saw him) were nothing exceptional, just an average Tuesday in the life of a Super. What kept her mind stuck in a cycle of self-flagellation was her argument with Lena. She continued to replay the conversation in her head and the more she dissected it, the angrier she became at herself.

To put it succinctly, she’d been stupid.

What she said was stupid.

What she did was stupid.

Stupid.

Stupid.

Stupid.

There were dozens of other things she could have said or done during their confrontation. Instead, she continued to throw more gasoline on the inferno their relationship had become. At this point, she’d lost count of how many asinine mistakes she’d made since Lena had entered her life.

The look on Lena’s face when she discovered she was using Myriad continued to haunt her. She could see anger, betrayal, and worst of all, disappointment written all over the CEO’s face. Kara continued to torture herself trying to figure out what Lena was most disappointed about. Was it Kara’s perceived hypocrisy regarding Myriad or was it her dismissive attitude towards Lena’s objections to her using it?

It occurred to her that maybe Lena put just as much value as she did in their conversation at CatCo the previous day. Maybe she was just as hopeful that they were on their way to repairing their tattered relationship, only to have the possibility utterly crushed.

All Kara knew at this point was that any chance of mending her broken heart had been ripped away and she had no one to blame but herself.

Compounding all of this was a nagging question that was quickly forcing its way into the forefront of Kara’s thoughts; something Lena had said during their brief tête-à-tête. It was a throwaway observation that Lena had made that, at the time, had been overshadowed by much more biting, cruel remarks. On the surface, it seemed completely benign, but as Kara often did, she pulled the statement apart piece by piece hoping to find if there was something she was missing. Some hidden clue that might provide her with a way to unfuck the situation.

Kara’s frustration was maxing out her patience. Under normal circumstances, if she was confused by something someone had said, she’d just ask them for clarification. But that wasn’t possible with Lena. She’d made it very clear that Kara was persona non grata at both her penthouse and L-Corp. She’d be pissed if Kara showed up unannounced at either location just to ask her to explain her comment. It would be reckless and stupid to just fly to wherever Lena was and confront her. She would have to be out of her mind to even contemplate being within a hundred yards of Lena after what transpired today.

Right?

Well…it would be if Kara didn’t have a plan.

A plan like the one she had just come up with.

Kara shut her eyes and tuned out the cacophony of sounds surrounding her to find a very specific heartbeat.

Kara sprung from her bed and made a mad dash to grab her cellphone off the kitchen counter; rapidly pulling up Alex’s contact.

*****

After a quick stop at the Tower to pick up the “package” that Alex had prepared for her, Kara continued on to her final destination.

Two hundred yards out from Lena’s penthouse, Kara’s super-hearing picked up the sound of proximity sensors alerting Lena to her approach. She heard Lena’s heartbeat spike at the automated notification accompanied shortly thereafter by a few sniffles. It sounded like the CEO was or had recently been crying. As much as Kara wanted to use her x-ray vision to confirm her suspicions, she didn’t want to violate Lena’s privacy any further than she already had by showing up unannounced.

Kara started getting nervous that Lena wasn’t going to come out, but before her anxiety could spiral any further, her former best friend emerged from the hallway; her gait as she approached the sliding glass door leading to the balcony indicated she was less than pleased with Kara’s impromptu visit. Kara was too distracted to notice Lena’s aggressive approach; her attention firmly focused on Lena’s attire. The CEO was clad in the same suit she wore when she confronted Kara in the Fortress earlier that day. Too distracted at the time to give it more than a passing glance, all the air escaped Kara’s lungs now that she was able to get a thorough view. She couldn’t help but admire the sharp, formfitting cut of the dark-hued suit, but her focus quickly shifted to the scintillating top that accompanied it. Kara licked her suddenly dry lips as she regarded the lace, floral print mock-neck top, and more importantly, the way it hugged Lena’s body like a second skin. She looked every bit the powerful, commanding, confident CEO. In Kara’s eyes, she looked like a goddess and, as far as Kara was concerned, she deserved to be worshipped like one.

Kara’s appreciation (appropriate or not, she couldn’t decide), was quickly tempered by the sobering thought that not too long ago, she would’ve been able to gush to Lena about how handsome she looked. Lena, as per usual, would try to take the compliment in stride, but her blushing cheeks and elevated heartbeat would give away how much she appreciated it.

But that was a lifetime ago, or what seemed like one. Until yesterday, Kara hadn’t been able to be in the same room as her without Lena’s resentment, pain, and feelings of betrayal enveloped them both, much less pay her a compliment about how stunning she looked.

Kara’s attention was quickly drawn back to reality as Lena stepped onto the balcony; the CEO was brandishing a very large blaster cannon. The cannon was clearly one of Lena’s custom jobs as it appeared to be constructed with an amalgam of alien parts.

“I don’t have time for any more of your bullshit, Supergirl!” Lena’s rage was on full display; her adrenaline infused heart thundered loudly. “You have five seconds to get the hell out of my airspace or I start shooting!” Lena furiously demanded.

So much for the warm welcome. Not that Kara expected one, but this…seemed a bit over the top.

Kara apparently wasn’t moving fast enough to comply with Lena’s command. The CEO activated the cannon and pointed it at Kara. “It’s not Kryptonite and it won’t kill you, but it’s got enough kick to knock you on your perfectly sculpted ass!”

Kara tilted her head to the side, confusion etched on her face from the off-hand comment. She decided to file it away for another day when she saw an orange glow coming from the cannon’s muzzle and Lena cocking her head to sight-in her target.

It was now or never.

“Would have helped me?” Kara yelled out.

“What?” Lena’s position remained unchanged.

“You said back at the Fortress that you knew at least four different ways to find the trapped Obsidian users, would you have helped me if I’d asked?” Kara did her best to keep her voice steady, hoping that Lena wouldn’t pick up on her anxiety.

Lena seemed taken aback by the question. Her brows furrowed, jaw clenched, and green eyes locked on Kara as she considered the question. Kara remained silent, floating quietly and not making any effort to get closer to the balcony. The quiet stand-off continued for another minute before Kara noticed Lena’s hands begin shaking from beneath the cannon. Kara could see the internal struggle going on inside Lena based on the conflicted look on the brunette’s face. Lena’s breathing intensified and her heartbeat became more rapid. Anyone who didn’t know the CEO’s facial tics would say she looked like she was in physical pain, but Kara knew better. She knew Lena’s logical side was currently warring with her emotions. She also knew that the best thing to do when Lena got into this type of headspace was to shut up and patiently wait for her to reengage.

With a flash of gnashed teeth and a frustrated growl, Lena powered down the cannon and lowered it to her side. Her eyes remained locked on Kara’s, but the tense look on her face softened into a resigned expression. She breathed out a long sigh, shut her eyes, and hesitantly nodded.

Kara let loose a relieved sigh and allowed herself a small grin. She regained Lena’s attention and motioned towards the balcony. “May I?”

Lena rolled her eyes and made an overdramatic wave signaling Kara to land. She unceremoniously dropped the laser cannon atop the smooth surface of the railing and turned back to face the slowly descending Kryptonian.

Kara’s boots lightly padded on the balcony as she landed; the hero made sure to allow Lena plenty of personal space. Despite the distance between them, Kara was able to confirm her theory when she first arrived: Lena had indeed been crying; evidenced by her puffy, red eyes.

Lena squared her shoulders and leveled Kara with a glare that fell somewhere between annoyed and homicidal; Kara was hoping it was closer to the former. “So what is it tonight, Supergirl? Begging for forgiveness or threatening me again?” Kara flinched from the blatant hostility. The scowl on Lena’s face drove a red-hot poker through Kara’s heart.

“No, nothing like that.” Kara reached into her belt and produced a flash drive. “I came to bring you this,” she said as she held up the pinky-sized device for Lena to view.

Lena cast a suspicious look towards Kara. “What is that?”

Kara contemplated pointing out that it was a flash drive but refrained; Lena was clearly not in a joking mood. “It’s a copy of the database from the Tower. Incident reports, field reports, surveillance footage, research, psych profiles, intelligence reports…basically everything we’ve compiled since the creation of Earth-Prime.”

Lena covered her surprise behind a loud throat clearing. “Intelligence reports on what exactly?”

Kara knew this would be the first thing Lena would focus on and had her response pre-loaded. “Obsidian, Andrea, Ben Lockwood, The DEO, Leviathan, Eve Teschmacher, Lex-”

“Of course,” Lena interrupted, practically sneering.

Kara ignored the comment. “And you,” she finished, locking eyes with Lena.

Lena’s mouth gaped open at Kara’s admission but she quickly regained her composure, her expressionless veneer now firmly in place. “Why are you giving this to me?”

Kara nervously chewed her bottom lip.  Her plan really didn’t involve a well thought out and rehearsed speech; Kara knew she would have forgotten every line once she faced Lena. Instead, she decided to let her words be guided by a singular directive:

Tell her the truth.

“I’m putting all my…our cards on the table so you can have an idea of what we’re up against. I want you to review the information and draw your own conclusions…then…maybe you can figure out where you fit into all this, instead of me telling you where you should be.” Lena remained silent; her face completely unreadable. Kara fought to mirror Lena’s stoicism but couldn’t hide her slight fidget. “And, selfishly, we could really use your help. The team hasn’t been the same since you…left.”

“Something tells me your sister would be less than thrilled if she found out you were giving me this.”

“Who do you think helped me put this together?” Kara said proudly, not even trying to hide her smile.

“You’ll have to excuse me if I don’t believe you,” Lena bit back.

Kara’s smile quickly disappeared, replaced by a crestfallen look. “That’s fair.” She forced herself to meet Lena’s icy glare head-on. “And why should you? All I’ve done is tell you that you should trust me and then shown you the complete opposite with my actions.”

“Is that why you’re giving that to me?” Lena nodded toward the flash drive still in Kara’s hand. “Is that your grand gesture to show your trustworthiness?”

Kara shrugged her shoulders, a sad smile on her face. “It would be great if you genuinely saw it that way but, no, there’s no strings attached.”

“Seems a bit risky to trust such sensitive information to a villain.” Lena’s voice was pure venom.

Kara involuntarily shuttered, a chill running through her spine at Lena’s brazen contempt. The hero ran a hand through her hair attempting to quell her feelings of shame and embarrassment that threatened to overwhelm her.

Tell her the truth.

Kara huffed out a sigh and placed the flash drive back into her belt. “I think we can both agree that me calling you a villain was one of the stupidest things I’ve ever said.” Kara dared to make eye contact with Lena only to receive a head tilt and raised brow from the CEO. “If you’re willing to humor me for a minute, I’d like to explain what happened that night,” Kara said with a hopeful look. Lena remained impassive; Kara took her lack of response as consent to continue. “You’re probably not going to believe me…no, I guarantee you won’t believe me, but earlier that evening I was visited by a fifth dimensional imp who showed me four different timelines where I told you I was Supergirl before Lex did.” Lena scoffed in disbelief, but Kara chose not to acknowledge her outburst. “All of them were a complete disaster no matter how early in our friendship I told you.” The memories of that night flooded back into her mind, forcing Kara to swallow the lump forming in her throat. “You ended up either dead or mutilated in three of the four timelines.” Kara’s eyes became glassy. “It scared the hell out of me, Lena, because even though none of those timelines were real, they reminded me of how vulnerable you are; especially now that you’re working with…” Kara trailed off and took a shaky breath. “It terrifies me that you’re working with Lex. I’m so scared that one day he’s going to decide he doesn’t need you anymore or he wants payback against you for shooting him and puts a bullet in the back of your head.” Kara began to choke up, her breath coming out in stuttering waves.

Lena watched on, her icy façade slowly melting as Kara endeavored to even out her breathing. Once she was able to compose herself, Kara’s watery blue eyes met with the CEO’s. “I can accept that you don’t want me in your life; I hate it, but I can accept it as long as I know you’re happy and thriving. But what I could never accept…could never live with…is a world without you in it.” Kara’s eyes began to glow; her face twisted with barely contained fury. “If Lex…if he took you from…if he killed you, I would track him down and tear him apart piece by piece until he begged me to kill him…and Rao help anyone who got in my way,” Kara choked out with a growl.

Lena’s brow furrowed and her mouth fell slightly open as she tried to process Kara’s chilling admission. Kara’s eyes cooled as she slowly composed herself. She took a step towards Lena. Much to her surprise, the CEO made no effort to step back. The two stood just out of arm’s length from each other. “So, when I landed here that night, I was so afraid that I decided to go the tough love route and give you some bullshit ultimatum that I knew was going to fail even before I finished saying it.” Kara’s entire body tensed, her balled up fists dug into her thighs as waves of shame rolled through her body. She took another step towards Lena. “I was so scared and desperate to get you away from him that I stupidly thought threats would be more effective than trying to reason with you.” Kara shook her head in disgust, jaw tightly clenched.

“You could have just talked to me,” Lena timidly admitted. “I might not have given you the warmest response, but I would have listened.”

Kara could see that Lena’s features had significantly softened. The hero thought she may have detected a hint of warmth and compassion in those hypnotic green eyes. Kara hesitantly grinned, not completely sure how to react to Lena’s changed demeanor, but it was short-lived. She was swiftly overcome with guilt; a forlorn look darkened her features.

“That would have been a kindness I didn’t…I don’t deserve.” Kara shook her head again, internally chastising herself. With a start, she realized that she was mere feet from Lena. As their eyes met for what seemed like the hundredth time that night, Kara was close enough to see the different shades in each of Lena’s irises. Kara could see that Lena’s hardened resolve had dissipated into a hesitant vulnerability.

Tell her the truth.

“Lena, I didn’t listen to you,” Kara said contritely. “You were right, what you said when you took Myriad. You told me about all the people you loved that betrayed you, but I didn’t listen. You begged me, in ways both said and unsaid, not to violate your trust, but I didn’t listen.” Kara could see Lena’s eyes become glassy with unshed tears, a slight tremble in her lip. Fighting back her own tears, Kara took another shaky breath. “Instead, I listened to my fears and the fears of others…people who, at first, couldn’t get passed your last name and wouldn’t even bother to try and get to know and understand you. I let those fears distract me from what you wanted, what you needed from me. I let those fears convince me that knowing my identity would put you in greater danger, which I know now is just ridiculous. I let those fears stop me from showing you my whole self because they told me you only wanted ‘Kara Danvers’, not ‘Kara Zor-El’. Worst of all, I let those fears convince me that you’d hate me, and that I’d lose you forever.”

Both women had tears streaming down their faces, so completely lost in each other’s eyes that they didn’t bother wiping them away. “I didn’t listen to you…to my heart, and if it costs me you, I will regret that decision for the rest of my life.”

Kara reflexively extended her hand towards Lena but quickly stopped herself when she realized what she was doing. Lena gave no indication that she saw Kara’s aborted attempt, the CEO simply continued to remain fixated on the hero’s eyes, conflicting emotions playing across her face. Kara shut her eyes and took a deep breath; her tightened eyelids unleashed a waterfall of unshed tears. They stood entranced with each other for an indeterminate amount of time before Kara, clearing her throat, snapped them out of it.

The two backed away from each other a few steps and began haphazardly wiping their tears away. Once her eyes were sufficiently cleared, Kara could see Lena’s features harden again, though with less intensity than when she first arrived at the CEO’s penthouse.

Kara could see that Lena was clearly debating with herself but before Kara could ask why, Lena held out her hand. “I’ll take the drive,” she said with calm certainty.

As she retrieved the flash drive from her belt, Kara fought to keep her enthusiasm contained, managing to limit her reaction to a tight grin.

Lena rolled her eyes and reached out for the proffered drive. As the device changed hands, their fingers brushed together. Kara’s super-hearing missed the flutter of Lena’s heartbeat, too distracted by her own thundering pulse that threatened to force her heart from her chest. “No strings?” Lena asked sternly, holding the flash drive at eye level.

“No strings.” Kara assured her with a smile.

“Okay,” Lena replied with hesitancy in her voice, placing the drive in her suit pocket. “I hope you know this doesn’t fix everything.”

Kara ruefully smiled. “I know.” The hero shifted uneasily. “But maybe this could be a start to repairing things…repairing us?” she said with a hopeful look.

Lena leveled Kara with a nervous glance before giving her a curt nod. “Um…so…if that’s all, I’m going to go to bed. It’s…been a long day,” Lena said awkwardly.

“Oh, yeah, right. Crazy day…uh…I’m sure you’re exhausted. Me too. Today’s been a real backbreaker…yeah, I should probably head home too…get some sleep…Oh! Maybe dinner first! Yeah, dinner first, then sleep.” Kara rambled through jittery hands, a slight dusting of pink on her cheeks.

Lena shook her head and turned to enter her penthouse, pulling the hair tie from her ponytail as she neared the backdoor.

Kara watched as Lena’s hair cascaded down her shoulders. She was suddenly struck by a wave of anxiety. Her conversation with Lena had gone better than expected, but Kara had so much more she wanted to say, and she feared she wouldn’t get the opportunity. She was afraid that somehow this tentative…well, whatever it was, would fall apart. She started to panic. Her chest felt like someone was sitting on it, an anxious knot formed in her stomach, and she could feel a lump forming in her throat.

Tell her the truth.

“Lena!” She blurted out without thinking.

The CEO was startled by the hero’s outburst and turned to face her, a yearning, drained look on her face.

“Lena I lo-” Kara’s entire body felt like it was on fire. Now confronted by the moment she so dearly wanted; she froze. She knew what she wanted to say. She wanted to tell her how much she missed her, how much she wanted to hold her, kiss her, and never let her go.

She wanted to tell Lena that she loved her more than anything in the multiverse.

But now wasn’t the time, she knew that deep in her heart. To tell Lena how she really felt about her would be too much, too soon. Their reconciliation was in its infancy, and Kara wasn’t going to jeopardize it by dropping a nuclear-sized emotion bomb on her. It wouldn’t be fair to either of them.

Tell her the truth…when it’s time.

“I love your suit. It’s a…I mean you look…really…” Kara was blushing so hard her cheeks were burning. “…maroon’s a good color on you,” she finally managed to stammer out.

It was apparent that Lena wasn’t expecting the compliment; the blush on her cheeks indicated as much. She averted her eyes from Kara’s gaze and timidly tucked some errant strands of hair behind her ear. Kara couldn’t help the satisfied smile that stretched across her lips; thrilled by Lena’s reaction. For a fleeting moment, it felt like old times, a hopeful reminder that not everything between them was irreparably broken.

Kara’s triumphant moment ended abruptly when Lena caught sight of the hero’s giddiness. Her shyness bled away and was replaced with an air of forced indifference. “Actually, it’s burgundy,” she pointed out haughtily.

“Oh,” Kara said bashfully; her embarrassment coloring her cheeks once again. “Well, you still look pretty handsome in it,” the hero responded sincerely, a look of reverence on her face.

Disarmed by Kara’s candidness, Lena’s regal stature quickly deflated. “Thank you,” she said sheepishly.

Kara’s smile became impossibly brighter. “Goodnight, Lena.” The hero lifted off from the balcony and leisurely coasted away.

Lena watched as her red cape disappeared into the night, a soft grin on her face. “Goodnight, Kara.”

[velvetvexations]

(this is from yesterday so this entire thing is written out and just copy pasted in.)

The more I see how you've been treated by other trans people, the more hollow all the posts repeating variations of 'love all trans women! Listen to all trans women! Have kindness and grace for all trans women! Even the bad and ugly and annoying ones!' become to me.

One one hand, these posts almost without fail dissolve into active vitriol the moment someone (foolishly and naively) tries to mention any other kind of trans person, which the OPs often shut down and treat as insulting, hostile, nefarious or a deliberate attempt to take away (steal?) the kindness away from transfems (like it's a finite resource?)

On the other, I follow a lot more transfems than transmascs, meaning I got to see how some of them felt about it. The anecdote that lasered itself into my brain was seeing a butch trans woman saying she felt bitter and kinda hopeless sharing that kind of message because her experience was that not even other trans women had any kindness or grace for her.

And then how this has played out for you. You and another trans woman disagreed, and instead of saying 'you're annoying me and I disagree with your opinion' she presented you as misgendering her (it's apparently not enough that you use they/them by default to account for all the genderfuckery on Tumblr. How dare you not be clairvoyant.), she didn't care that you corrected yourself and told the person crawling out of the woodwork to talk shit about her to fuck off, she said you 'threatened to share' her nsfw account when you censored the url and told the anon to get lost, and blamed you for a shitstorm resulting from her saying something controversial.

Going further, you get that asshole demanding you 'give the URL of your transfem mutuals'. It reminds me of how everyone, including other transfems, were screaming at Tumblr's CEO to show 'proof' that predstrogen had said or done something worthy of being banned. And it's just... Does anyone hear themselves? Why is everyone okay demanding personal or potentially intimate information about transfems for the sake of 'proof?' Why do you have to hand off the URLs of people you know so some asshole can presumably judge them and dismiss them for not being good enough? Does no one else find it insane that it's okay to bulldoze transfem's privacy for the sake of 'proof'?

Is this why those positivity posts are so often structured like commands? So that everyone can nod their head and pat their backs self righteously for doing the 'right thing' of passing this command along to the unspecified OTHER meant to ACTUALLY work on treating transfems better? Did everyone press the reblog button to look good or something? I thought everyone, trans people included, agreed that the point was tangibly and personally putting in some effort to do better?

I always internalised those posts as a rallying cry to do better, all of us, but it seems like it's played out as an excuse for people to use personal pain to justify lashing out and pushing the DOING better part onto 'someone else'.

Yeah, like. So much of it just comes off as virtue signaling? I recently got accused of being an anti-SJW for using that term lol but that's an actual thing that actually happens. It's so performative. It's theory.

And it really does frustrate me that I can't take those posts seriously. Regardless of what anyone else thinks, I have serious chest thumping anxiety about the constant, terrifying situation we're all in. We as in "me as well". So I want to take comfort in those posts that are about how the OP will support trans women with their dying breath, I did take comfort in those posts, but then I look for five seconds on OP's blog and find ten posts about transandro bros and I want to never hear someone say they support me ever again because they're all fucking snakes and their support is completely worthless to me.

[hearthouses]

happy wincest wednesday!! what do you think would happen if jess found out?

This is highly dependent on when she finds out and how she finds out, in my opinion.

Personally, I struggle a lot with fics where Jess is immediately okay with it and even kinks on incest because it often feels like an easy way to avoid conflict and drama. In an effort to sketch out her character, it feels more like she's positioned as a "cool girl" plot device who is down for anything rather than a fully formed, real person with feelings that can be hurt. So for a situation where Jess eventually becomes okay with it, I imagine it would take a lot of work and development to get there.

My primary thought would be an AU where Jess lives, but in the process is injured and traumatized, and feeling deeply hurt and betrayed by Sam who she discovers has been lying and ommiting truths, leaving her vulnerable. If she chooses to go with them, it would need to be for herself and her own peace of mind, but in the process, she would be getting to know Sam as he is and not as he presented himself, all his dark parts and secrets, and not knowing if she can love this Sam when she fell in love with an illusion. In this AU, I imagine she becomes closer to Dean by default of there being no history, Dean is a clean slate, Dean hasn't lied to her and made her believe he was someone he wasn't. A writer would have to develop Dean and Jess as a separate relationship and dynamic, then have Jess open up to Sam again.

As for her finding out about Sam and Dean in this scenario, I think depending how everything unfolds and develops is what would make or break it. I don't think Jess is in a position to immediately accept it because I imagine she's lived a fairly regular life, and while I think people are cool with things in fiction, it's another thing entirely to have it shoved in your face in reality. I imagine in the best case scenario, with development, it's still a shock to her system and she would have to reconcile everything else that has happened, on top of finding out the man she was going to possibly marry is in love with his brother. So I waver on if she can fully commit and be all in, or not, which I don't blame her at all for and would rather a more realistic and messy possible break up, over a situation that rings hollow and false.

As for finding out during the canon Stanford timeline, I can't imagine any other scenario than her assuming Dean had sexually abused Sam. This would be figuring something happened when Sam was underage, and that Dean being older and his caregiver meant he took advantage. I think she would loathe Dean in this scenario and attempt to help Sam with trying to get him therapy or give him books or find groups he can attend, all while Sam continues to insist it was never like that and wholeheartedly defending Dean. I imagine she would be cold to Dean when he shows up in the pilot and unable to figure out why Sam would want to go off with him.

I also like scenarios where Sam confesses half-truths, like he was younger when he lost his virginity to somone older and Jess using context clues and coming to the worst conclusions. In these scenarios, Jess means well and is trying to help Sam because she loves him and she's never going to be able to wrap her mind around in what world any of this would be okay, or even understandable. She doesn't have the same frame of reference or experience. I personally would love to see more fics that explore the complexities and nuances of what it would be like to be Jess and having to come to terms with all this information, as well as fics that don't necessarily end in a happy poly Sam/Dean/Jess situation, but rather Jess realizing the best thing for her would be to walk away.