#i was going crazy not being able to draw for over two weeks again so i went on A Hunt. anyway. throws this out.

[alonetogether]

relived 2013 bandom by doing this on a wacom bamboo

[7ndipity]

Shy

Yoongi x Reader

Summary: You’re desperately craving your boyfriend's attention, but are too shy to ask for it outright. Luckily, Yoongi knows what you want anyway.

Word Count: 2.1k

Warnings: +18 mdni, smut, swearing, unprotected sex(don’t do this pls), soft dom-ish Yoongi, brief mentions of insecurities, not proofread

A/N: Thanks @theuselessdaydreamingidiot for requesting this! I had so much writing this one, I hope you like it!

Masterlist

°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

He had to be doing this on purpose.

Normally, Yoongi could read you like a book, whether that was knowing whether you’d had a particularly rough day or just what food you were craving, all you had to do was look at him and he would know what you wanted.

Which was why his current lack of response to your attempts to gain his attention was so frustrating.

The two of you hadn’t been able to see each other all week due to your work schedules, and to say you were starting to go a little crazy was an understatement. As soon as you got to his place, all you had been able to think about was jumping his bones. Normally, you didn’t consider yourself a particularly horny person, but being without your boyfriend for any extended amount of time definitely tended to make you extra needy.

It didn’t help that your boyfriend in question somehow managed to look so fucking hot all. the. time. Even the simple sweatpants and white tee combo he was wearing was enough to make you clench your thighs together with need in your current state.

You’d tried your best to ignore it through dinner, but once the two of you had cozied up together on the couch to watch an episode of a drama, you couldn’t take it anymore. You were hyper aware of the warmth radiating off of his body, his arm looped loosely around your waist, the scent of his cologne filling your senses and drawing you closer, tucking your face against his neck as the ache in your core grew stronger.

Fuck you wanted him so bad.

Usually, all you needed to do was just give a little hint that you were in the mood to Yoongi and he would take the lead for you, asking in a low voice if you wanted to make each other feel good, an offer that you always readily agreed to.

But tonight, nothing seemed to catch his attention.

You let your fingers dance over his skin, tracing little patterns over his arm, up his bicep to his shoulder and back again, trying to elicit a response from him, but all he’d done was tighten his other arm around your waist ever so slightly.

Deciding to try being a bit more direct, you shifted around in his hold, pressing teasing little kisses along the underside of his jaw, knowing it was one of his weak spots, hoping he would finally catch on to hint at what you wanted.

Yoongi hummed appreciatively, but his attention was still fully locked on the screen in front of you, relaxing further into the couch.

You drew back slowly, frowning in frustration as you studied his side profile.

Maybe he was just really interested in the show, maybe he wasn’t in the mood, you weren’t sure, but you felt too shy and awkward to ask outright.

Giving up, you slipped out from under his arm and stood up.

“Where’re you going?” He asked, finally looking up at you with a small frown.

“I’m tired, I think I’m just gonna go on to bed.” You lied.

“Are you sure?” He asked with a slight pout. “You want me to come with you?”

Yes please! “No, you stay and finish the show.” You pecked his cheek. “G’night, Baby.”

You quickly made your way down the hall to his room, not bothering with a light as you climbed into bed, curling onto your side away from the door, staring at the wall in frustration.

You don’t know why you hadn’t just said yes when he’d offered to come with you, maybe then he would’ve caught on if you’d tried again? Or maybe he was intentionally ignoring you as a way to tease you for your shyness with him.

You don’t know why you always felt so shy to initiate anything sexual with Yoongi, it wasn’t like your relationship was particularly new or anything, but everytime you even thought about saying the same things that Yoongi said to you, they sounded so awkward and unsexy, not at all like when he said them. When he said them, you felt your stomach drop in the best way, your knees turning to jelly as your heart rate picked up. In just a few words, he could completely turn you to putty in his hands, a skill you desperately wished you possessed at times like this. Instead you were laying in bed alone and irritated.

No more than five minutes had passed before you heard the bedroom door behind you open,

Yoongi’s footsteps padding softly across the carpeted room to the bed.

You heard him chuckle softly to himself before the mattress dipped under his weight, quietly sliding under the covers and shifting over till he was pressed against your back, draping an arm over your waist.

“Babe? Are you asleep?” He asked softly.

“ ‘m trying to.” You grumbled, brushing his arm off of you. “I thought you were watching your show?”

“I missed you too much.” He said, nuzzling his face in your hair. “It’s no fun without you.”

You didn’t respond, but he could sense you soured mood

“I’m sorry baby. Was I not giving enough attention earlier?” He wound his arm around your waist again, pulling you close as his lips trailed along your neck and shoulder, mirroring your actions from earlier.

You squirmed slightly against him, not wanting to cave so easily, but his wandering hands and warm breath against your skin flooded your core with arousal, your breath hitching and coming out unsteady.

“Let me make it up to you.” He murmured against your skin, his hand making its way under your shirt, fingers brushing over where your skin disappeared under the material of your sleep shorts.

Fuck, you were so weak for him.

“Please.” You breathed, arching closer to him.

You made a soft noise, something between a whimper and his name as he continued to leave a trail of kisses against the flushed skin of your neck as his fingers slipped under the waistband, creeping lower till they brushed your pubic bone, just shy of where you needed him.

You squirmed in his gentle hold, bordering on desperation now.

“Yoongi,” You pleaded. “Please.” You needed him, and you weren’t sure how much longer your sanity could hold out against his teasing touches.

“I got you, baby,” He assured you softly, retracting his hand. “I’ll take care of you.”

He gently rolled you over, caressing your face before bringing his lips to yours in a tender kiss.

You sighed in relief, looping your arms around his neck to keep him close as he shifted to hover over you, settling between your legs that fell open to accommodate him.

His grip on your waist tightened in surprise as your tongue delved into his mouth, swallowing down the sweet, almost inaudible groan that left him as your wet muscle tangled with his own.

God, you were addicted to the taste of him, light and sweet with a faint bitterness of the wine you’d drank at dinner.

His fingers dug into your thighs, dimpling the flesh as he ground his hips against yours, pressing his growing erection against your clothed core, your arousal soaking through the material of your shorts and making them stick to you slightly.

You don’t know when he removed his sweats, all you were aware of was his fingers hooking in the waistband of your shorts, tugging them down as you lifted your hips to help him remove them, leaving you both bare from the waist down.

“My sweet baby.” He hummed, leaving another trail of wet kisses down your throat as he brushed two fingers through your slick folds, making you hiss as he teased your throbbing clit.

“Fuck Yoongi, please!” You begged. You had lost all patience, shamelessly bucking against his hand to any sort of relief, and in turn breaking any resistance he held.

As weak as you might have been for Yoongi, he was even more so for you, willing to give you anything you wanted and more. You could ask him for the moon and he would find a way to technically give it to you.

Removing his fingers, he shifted position to align the tip of his cock with your entrance. You were so wet and needy already, he slipped into you easily without any prep, sinking in all the way to the hilt in one go, making your eyes roll back in pleasure at finally being filled.

“Fuck, you feel so good, Angel.” He groaned, watching the way your hungry cunt swallowed him so eagerly. He pulled back, rolling his hips into yours slowly, letting you feel every inch and vein of his cock as it dragged against your walls.

“Fuck Yoongi, faster, please.” You practically mewled, clinging to his shoulders.

It was almost embarrassing, how reactive you were, how fast you fell apart for him, but you couldn’t bring yourself to care, all you wanted was for Yoongi to fuck you properly.

The desperation in your voice sent a shot of electricity straight through Yoongi, making his cock twitch inside you as he immediately picked up the pace, plunging back into you quickly and setting a pace that had your toes curling.

His arms were braced against the mattress on either side of you, caging you in while your own hands clutched feebly at his back, nails scraping against his skin, leaving bright red lines and crescent marks in their wake.

Yoongi buried his face in your neck, groaning out with nearly every thrust, not bothering to try and muffle them as he knew they only spurred you further on as well, making you clench and spasm around him.

“F-fuck, Yoongi! I-I‘m close!” You managed to whine out,

“I know, baby, it’s okay.” Yoongi panted, kissing your neck. “Let go, I’ve got you.”

A few more thrusts of Yoongi’s hips were all that it took to tip you over the edge, a sharp ringing filling your ears as your high crashed over you, flooding your senses and causing your muscles to contract and spasm in bliss.

Yoongi followed almost immediately after you, spilling deep inside you with a broken groan, body going stiff over yours as he shuddered through the aftershocks.

He half collapsed on top of you, rolling to the side to avoid crushing you as you both lay there, chests heaving as you tried to catch your breath.

“Feel better?” He asked breathlessly.

“Yeah,” You replied weakly. “Thank you.”

“Anytime.” He grinned, leaning up to kiss your cheek. “Though, you know, if you wanted sex, you could just ask. You don’t have to keep teasing me till I say something.”

“So you were paying attention earlier!” You exclaimed, sitting up to look at him. “Why didn’t you say anything?”

“I was waiting to see if you would say something first,” He said, sitting up as well. “But then you went off to sulk instead.”

“I wasn’t sulking.” You pouted.

“Yes you were.” He smiled softly, wrapping his arms around you. “What I want to know though is why? Why won’t you ever initiate sex with me directly? You always kinda dance around it till I make the first move.” He looked down at you curiously.

“I don’t know.” You looked down, feeling your face heat up. “I guess I just feel kinda shy.”

Yoongi let out a short burst of laughter.

“Babe, you are one of the least shy people I’ve ever met!” He laughed. “I’ve seen you make friends in the middle of the grocery store after having a full blown debate with someone over the validity of skim milk!”

“That’s different! This is you and me, it’s feels embarrassing!” You buried your face in his chest, earning another chuckle from him. “What am I supposed to do, just jump you as soon as you walk in the door and say 'I need you in me or I’ll die'?”

“I mean, that would be really hot,” He smirked, earning a weak smack from you. “But seriously, you don’t need to feel embarrassed with me. Anytime you’re in the mood, just tell me. Hell, we could even make up a codeword if that makes you feel better.” He offered.

“What, like ‘Pineapple’?” You asked, incredulously.

“Sure, if that’s what you want. As of now, Pineapple means sex.” He announced, making you burst into a fit of laughter of your own.

“You’re insane!” You giggled.

“Only for you.” He said with a grin. “I mean it though, I want you to feel comfortable talking to me about stuff like this.”

You nodded, letting you head rest back against his chest.

“Thank you.” You said. “For not making fun of me.”

“I would never.” He said seriously, pressing a kiss to your temple. “Love you.”

“Love you too.”

You drifted off to the sound of Yoongi’s heartbeat, completely and utterly content.

You did, however, wake up the next morning to several containers of fresh pineapple in the refridgerator.

“You think you’re funny, don’t you?”

“I think I’m hillarious.”

Taglist: @sopebubbles-replies @btsw1fe @this-must-be-my-tardis @whitefoxgirl @bethanysnow @coffeedepressionsoup @main-bangtansmauyeondan @feminympho @a-gayish-unicorn @dfqcsqueen @mother2monsters @captainorangegoose @k4ngelz

[ladykailitha]

The Harrington Pattern Part 12

Hey all, this story will wrap up today, so next week it will go back to just one chapter a day on Tuesdays and Thursdays and when Glitters wraps up, Sundays will go back to one a day as well.

A short chapter for the first of two, because this chapter got too long and needed to be cut down a tad and the next part fits better as a whole.

Eddie and Steve finally kiss and just giving Steve the loving crafting circle he needs.

TAG LIST IS CLOSED

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11

****

Steve got to see where the cast ate their meals, where some of the cast stayed in large tents (for those that had traveled from out of state but couldn’t afford a hotel), he got to meet the people who sold the food to the tourists, and the people who cleaned up every night.

It was marvelous.

“So was the two events they were trying to schedule at the same time, the joust and your trick riding?” Steve asked after they left the cleaners.

Eddie grinned. “Close, the sword fighting and my trick riding. I told them that I would happily run over those bastards, but I didn’t think the horses would appreciate it.”

“I bet that got them to change their tune,” Steve said with a laugh.

“It sure did, sweetheart,” Eddie murmured.

Suddenly they found themselves utterly alone.

“Steve–” Eddie began, but Steve placed his fingers on his lips.

“Just wait,” he said softly. “There’s something I want to give you first.”

Eddie blinked at him. “You bought me a present?” he asked. Well technically he said, “Ym brut me apresemnt?” since Steve still had his fingers over his mouth.

Steve laughed and dug it out of his pocket. “It’s been on a little journey, one that nearly gave me a heart attack,” he murmured, “but Jeff was able to get it back to me in time.”

He handed the small pouch over to Eddie.

Eddie took it gingerly and rubbed it between his fingers as he looked at the small thing that Steve had made for him. But as small as the item itself was the giving of it, was massive.

“I remembered you telling me that your dice bag broke,” Steve mumbled, “and I really wanted to thank you for all your help this weekend. I don’t think I could of done it without you.”

Eddie looked up at Steve with glossy eyes. “It’s perfect, Stevie.”

“I plan on giving a bunch to Katie for her to sell while I make the bigger pieces,” Steve continued, “and Robin said that I should give the first one to you, because it’s special. And you deserve something really special, Eds. Because you’re special to me and I–”

Whatever else Steve was going to say got swallowed up by Eddie kissing him firmly on the lips.

He had just grabbed Steve by the face and locked their lips together.

Steve was stocked into stillness, but that didn’t last long as he pulled Eddie close to him and deepened the kiss.

Eddie let out a happy sigh as they parted for breath. “Wow, baby. You kiss like it might be your last.”

“Eh...” Steve said with a half shrug and a lopsided smile, “when you’ve faced more then one ends of the world, it very well could be.”

Eddie chuckled, pressing their heads together. “You’ve got me there, big boy.”

“Mhmm,” Steve said softly. “And I’ve got you here, too.” His arms tightened around Eddie’s waist, drawing them flush against each other.

Eddie swatted at him. “Sap.”

Steve kissed him again. “If I’m a sap, then you’re my tree.”

“That was corny even for you, honey,” he murmured, swatting at him at playfully.

Steve just laughed.

****

The end of the Renaissance Fair had come at last. There had been more then a few bumpy moments, but looking out at all the happy faces being lit up by fireworks, Steve was pleased with the results.

And next year was going to be even better, he had plans for helping the kids have quality costumes like Corroded Coffin boys had.

He might still have to do some altering instead of full on sewing all of the costumes, but he was really looking forward to it.

Katie had told him that he had several people offer her crazy money for the pouch he had accidentally dropped, so he promised her a dozen by the end of next week for her next Fair. In different sizes too.

Eddie had been the one to suggest that. Little coin purses, dice bags, and even handbag sized ones. Eddie was even going to help him find the right materials for it, ones that weren’t as expensive as the little dice bag Steve gave him.

Steve was really looking forward to it.

They hadn’t told the kids yet about their change in relationship. Not yet. They wanted to hold onto it for themselves a little longer.

Though, judging from the look that Will and Mike had sent him, Steve was pretty sure most of them had figured it out anyway.

So what started out with longing gazing into each others’ eyes, ended with holding hands under the cover of darkness as fireworks exploded overhead.

Steve had never been happier and he just knew more happiness was coming his way.

****

Steve was proven right when Claudia called him up the next morning.

“Good morning, Mrs. Henderson,” Steve murmured sleepily.

“I’m sorry, dear,” she said, “did I wake you?”

Steve looked blearily at the clock on the microwave. It was after ten in the morning.

“It’s fine,” he muttered, “I don’t usually sleep this late.”

“While that is certainly true,” Claudia agreed, “you also don’t normally spend three full days at a fair. Too much sun, too much fun, and too little sleep makes for a tired Steve. Don’t be so hard on yourself.”

Steve blushed. “Thanks, Mrs. Henderson. Was there something you needed?”

“Oh, yes!” she said brightly. “Are you free this afternoon, from around two to four?”

Steve looked over at his calendar and squinted. “Looks like it, unless the nuggets call for rides to wherever.”

Claudia chuckled. “I think they’re going to be just as tired as you and not want to go anywhere today.”

He laughed. “Yeah, probably.”

“So, me and couple of the other moms have a sewing circle every Sunday,” she explained. “And we were all wondering if you wanted to come and join us. We have punch and little treats and spend two hours working on whatever project we have going on while we fill each other in on what’s happening in our lives.”

“You gossip,” Steve accused, teasingly.

She giggled. “Gossip is such tawdry word.”

“Like your every day language wouldn’t make a sailor blush,” Steve said dryly.

“And how would you know that?” she asked, curiosity coloring her tone.

“Ma’am, your son has the worst language I’ve ever seen on a teenager,” Steve said, “and I’m damn sure he didn’t get it from his dad. Even when he was alive.”

Claudia’s giggle turned into a full on laugh. “All right, you’ve got me there, Steve. So you’ll come?”

“Yeah, I’ll be there.”

“Fantastic!” she cried. “We meet at Joyce’s this week.”

“This week?” Steve asked, already plotting what to bring as a treat and which project he wanted to start.

“Yes,” Claudia explained. “We rotate every week so that one person isn’t stuck hosting every time. And if you come often enough, we’ll have it your place once in a while, as well.”

Steve frowned appreciatively. “Sounds good. I’ll see you later then.”

Claudia squealed in excitement. “I can’t wait. We’re going to teach you how to use a sewing machine!”

That really piqued Steve’s interest. “Oh yeah?”

“It was Karen Wheeler’s idea,” she explained. “Karen doesn’t sew like the rest of us, but she does cross-stitch while we all chat. Apparently Mike was telling her about all the sewing you did for him and his friends and that it was all by hand.”

Steve nodded, forgetting she couldn’t see him. “Yeah, my parents thought sewing was for girls, so I learned by hand.”

“Make sure to bring some examples of your work,” she said. “I want to blow Olive Peterson’s mind. She’s of the same mind as your parents, even though what she does, the knitting, was originally only for men.”

“I have these pouches I’ve decided to make and sell,” Steve said with a grin, “so I can bring those to work on and bring some of the work I did for the kids to show off.”

“That’s brilliant!” Claudia said. “I see you later!”

Steve said goodbye and hung up.

This just might be the thing he needed.

****

Part 13

Don't quote me on the knitting originally being for men thing, it was something I learned when I read a 12 Dancing Princesses retelling years and years ago. The soldier in the story knitted to keep awake at night.

Tag List: @mira-jadeamethyst @rozzieroos @itsall-taken @redfreckledwolf @emly03

@spectrum-spectre @estrellami-1 @zerokrox-blog @carlyv @gregre369

@a-little-unsteddie @chaosgremlinmunson @messrs-weasley @chaoticlovingdreamer @maya-custodios-dionach

@danili666 @goodolefashionedloverboi @val-from-lawrence @i-must-potato @wonderland-girl143-blog

@justforthedead89 @vecnuthy @irregular-child @bookbinderbitch @bookworm0690

@anne-bennett-cosplayer @yikes-a-bee @awkwardgravity1 @littlewildflowerkitten @genderless-spoon

@cinnamon-mushroomabomination @dragonmama76 @scheodingers-muppet @ellietheasexylibrarian @thedragonsaunt

@useless-nb-bisexual @thespaceantwhowrites @paintgonewrong @mogami13 @beelze-the-bubkiss

@croatoan-like-its-hot @retro-vagabond @sani-86 @pansexuality-activated @y4r3luv

@dauntlessdiva @vampire-eddie-brain-rot @lololol-1234 @nightmareglitter @cryptid-system CLOSED

[lowkeyrobin]

hello! can i please request hcs with quackity about being in a long distance relationship with him?

yes omg!! thanks for the request! ; I tried, I tried not that great

QUACKITY ; long distance relationship

summary ; you and quackity are online daters /j

warnings ; language

genre ; fluff

word count ; 686

y/s/n = your ship name

masterlist

you met at Twitch Rivals

you're both content creators which is obviously how you met

you guys bonded over shared interactions and the games you'd both lost

you got along so great that you exchanged information and decided you should stream together sometime

a couple weeks later you were invited to a jackbox stream with him, fundy, tommy, tubbo, bbh, and niki

shit went crazy

"Y/u/n, is there anything you'd like me to call you before we start? Like nickname or just y/u/n?" Niki asks

You graciously answer her, letting her know your name and proffered pronouns. Tommy makes a little, very lighthearted joke before pointing out someone in chat already making you and Niki and you and Alex ship names.

"Oh God, they've got us" You chuckle. "They're both mine, chat"

"AYO? SINCE WHEN?" Alex shouts

Niki giggles, covering her mouth.

"Since now" You shrug

you decided to try dating during the second north carolina meetup

you both had some fuzzy feelings about each other and mutually agreed on 'well hey, we like each other, why not try it out?'

being near the beach and with all your friends made it like a dream

but after two weeks, you had to go home

but you left your relationship untitled for now

Streaming together continued as per usual. So did long talks and phone calls, and hours spent playing video games (mostly Minecraft) together.

the next trip was to LA to visit Alex this time

you guys had your first kiss on his balcony overlooking the city

the way he giggled after omg

during that trip, you established your relationship and started to go on every day dates and stuff

but then you had to go home again

Honestly, both of you didn't really think about what to do with your relationship once you went home. You were taking it all in while you had it and weren't thinking about the very true reality of it all.

you thought talking was constant? it is now

sometimes both of you will just stay up late and rant about what you like about each other and corny shit

youre the one to softlaunch the relationship to fans

you probably guessed the password to his twitter/instagram and changed his bio to "y/u/n's bf 💯💯"

he didnt even know until people were flooding his dms and people on tik tok were talking about it

hed already said he was okay with telling people as long as you were tho

sends you pictures of flower bouquets once a week with some thought out, very loving paragraph or poem

he constantly complains about not being able to kiss or cuddle you

"y/n/n why are you so far away!?"

"i told you id be able to pay for you to live with me"

"UGHHHHHHHHH"

sends you good morning/goodnight texts and talks about what you'd be doing that day if you were together

cheesy little man

always spamming you w pics of Tiger

will religiously send you memes and blow up your phone if you're busy or ignoring him

yk the relationship is srs when even your qsmp characters are in love

the lore.

half of its heartbreaking angst and the other half is literally your bucket lists/daydreams of the future of your relationship

hes so down bad for you

will do anything to make you smile or make you flustered

will make the most suggestive jokes in front of friends, stay silent for a second or two and yell "im joking, im joking!"

orders you doordash/uber eats when you're doing subathons or generally long streams

will always join through vc/greenscreen when youre doing cooking streams

you'll do greenscreen dates (like the fiances stream) once a month and gossip over takeout LMAO

genuinely asks his fanartists to make ship art of you two because he loves seeing all the ideas and cute shit

they always draw you with one of his beanies or hats on, the occasional necklace

you reblog tumblr y/s/n fanart 24/7/365

karaoke streams are a must

you guys rank those "songs that all white people love" videos and rate the songs

dare or hot wing streams when youre literally anywhere but near each other>>

also playing just dance using vc and stream green screen>>>

[anadiasmount]

having to share bed with ex-bsf! jude after a night out, but he’s cold and shivering in his sleep and you can’t help but hold him. jude being all soft and subby bc he doesn’t want you to let go. apologizing over and over and falling asleep after not being able to for many weeks ☹️

it was absolutely freezing outside. small drops of water, frozen along the windows and doors. the wind gushing, hearing the trees and bushes swing. but for some reason that hadn’t stop your friends to go out and go clubbing. you had came back early, refusing to walk or wait outside in the current weather conditions.

quickly taking a body shower and slipping into warm pjs. you laid in your side, observing the walls rigid imprints. your fingers played with your necklace, attempting to calm nerves that built up by thinking of jude.

you closed your eyes quickly when your bedroom opened. knowing it was jude, you heart skipped beats, feeling the empty space next to you, but also in your chest. you heard him place the keys down, the dresser door open as he probably got clothes.

jude followed you, to and from the club, not wanting a single thing to happen to you, to protect you and keep you safe. even if the two of you were mad at each other and not on speaking terms. “why does she have to be so stubborn? why can’t she for once listen to me?”

jude quickly slipped on a pair of plaid pjs and a black long sleeve. not saying a single word or mutter as he grabbed the blanket and slipped into bed. he could smell the similar scent you wore always. having to hold back from pulling you close to him so the two of you could talk and make things right.

he remained still, turning his head back to watch you sound asleep. he knew you were asleep by the small pout on your lips, and heavy breathing you let out. he sighed and shifted to stare at you. “if only you knew how much i love you darling. i’d do anything to fix us, for you to be mine…” jude said in small whisper.

by the movements and storm outside, the weather had gotten worse. you squinted your eyes not adjusted to the light, reading the clock at 2am. you looked over, being faced with jude’s back. he was cold, shivering and trembling, despite wearing hotter clothing than you.

as you debated whether to wake him or not, you heard him sleep soundly. not a single noise from outside disturbing his sleep. just the cold feeling. “why does he have to be so oblivious? why couldn’t he see the way he made you feel? was the damage already done?” you thought.

you propped yourself onto your shoulder, a hand reaching out to wake jude up. “jude? ba- i mean jude? wake up, your shaking like crazy. are you feeling okay?” you mentally slapped yourself, almost calling him “baby.” jude stirred awake, then became aware of his surroundings when he saw the soft look in your face.

“come here. let me warm you up. you could catch a cold or worse pneumonia,” you say, laying down and extending your left arm for jude to lay there. jude groaned at the warmth your body produced, as he laid ontop of you.

your legs tangled with his, jude’s body ontop of yours as he began to calm his trembling. jude placed his head in the crook of your neck, finally breathing the scent he had to been dying for. he placed a small kiss on there, sighing in relief as he felt you.

jude felt your hands slide along his back, the draws of your palms and fingertips to your nails raking along the clothes material. you covered him as much as possible with blankets not caring if later on you go hot.

“i’m sorry,” jude muffled, his hand pulling you closer to him. he kept repeating and apologized over and over again, letting himself finally put the two do you out of misery after. jude could feel the warmness in your hands, the slow and tiny kisses you spread along his forehead, small “it’s okay,” leaving your mouth. “i haven’t been able to sleep, y/n. i can’t sleep if you’re not next to me or if i haven’t heard anything from you.”

“jude. i forgive you, now please just go to sleep, we can talk more in the morning,” you said in a small voice, jude relaxing and letting him fall completely on you, the deep slumber coming back to him as he fought his sleep but ended up sleeping soundly.

“if only you knew how much i love you jude. and not in a friend way. in the way i see you as my future husband. why can’t you just listen to me?”

[captainpulisic]

your kiss, my cheek, I watched you leave - m. mount

feedback is appreciated, thank you.

word count: 2.1 k gif credits to owner

if anyone asked either of you about it, neither you nor mason would be able to explain how the fight had started. you’re not entirely sure what had made you two so upset with each other, you just knew this bitchy attitude had been happening all morning.

there you were, in the kitchen, pondering over how this fight had started. could it have been about the girl who had been too touchy with him at last night's party? maybe it was about the extra hours you had spent at work this past week, arriving home long after mason had gone to sleep? fuck, if we’re being honest, it was probably about who had finished the last pint of ice cream, maybe? 

as you look at the clock, you decide to put a pin on this reflection, seeing it’s nearly time to leave for tonight's game (just because you both want to murder each other right now doesn’t mean you won’t go, you were never one to miss a game, if you could help it.). you head up the stairs to your bedroom, the same stairs mason had stormed up a few minutes ago. what a child, you nearly laugh at the image of masons pout when you called him immature. instead of retorting with, also, calling you a name, he simply huffed and stomped up the stairs. seconds later, the sound of a door being shut rang throughout the whole house. 

as you enter your shared bedroom, you’re greeted with masons back. his tense movements and the manner in which he is throwing clothes into his duffel bag, let you know he’s still feeling raw about the fight. 

you still feel pretty raw, too. thus, you spare him no glance as you shove past him. yes, you still put on your number nineteen jersey (not wearing it would be a little too much, even you know where to draw the line. mason would see it as a stab to his heart). yet, as you remember how he rolled his eyes when you called him unreasonable, you feel irked again. you need some sort of retaliation. you make a show of putting a plain, grey hoodie over the jersey, refusing to meet his stare. that oughta show him, you think to yourself. he looks as if he wants to say something, yet resorts to another eye roll and an even louder scoff. 

both of your attitudes were so horrendous, they continued as you settled into the car. the whole ride to the bridge, not one word was uttered to each other. no, it was all huffy sighs and the low hum of the music playing. hell, even the way he was holding your hand was stiff, no gentle squeezes or lip brushes. (what? just because he’s furious at you doesn’t mean he’s not going to hold your hand. he's upset, not crazy.)

when you arrive at the bridge, you both linger by the entrance, unsure of what to do or how to depart. usually, on happy days with no fights, you both stay there as long as possible, as you pepper his face with kisses. one on his forehead, one on each cheek, one on the little red spot on the bridge of his nose. you repeat this ritual until you’re both giggling messes. lastly, it ends with one final, proper kiss on his lips before he has to leave for some pre game obligations. mason refers to this as his ‘good luck kisses’. he swears on every star and planet that these ‘good luck kisses’ are the reason they win. before, you’d brushed it off as mason just making silly excuses to get kisses. you’d always been one to indulge him because who were you to deny him kisses? but to mason, he wholeheartedly believed that your little ritual meant something, it was the one superstition he followed before every game.

“you can never not kiss me, or else you’ll have to tell everyone you’re the reason we lost”, he had explained to you. even though you had laughed, it quickly died off when you saw his dead serious expression. “y/n, there’s nothing funny about this. the whole clubs future depends on you and me getting it on.”

therefore, your little tradition was born. if there was a game, mason could be found being kissed to death by you. if ben or conor or anyone else happened to pass by during this, their teasing would be answered with masons, “do you want us to win or not?”

when chelsea would end up winning a match, he’d get so smug. he’d claim that your kisses really were lucky, crediting you for their win. no, you weren’t just his good luck charm, you were the entire teams. if they happened to lose, even with your good luck kiss, he simply blamed it on someone else's performance or the refs shit calls. 

“well that was unfortunate, but it wasn’t my fault,” he would whisper in your ear, as you greeted him after a hard loss. you’d just shake your head, assuring him he was spectacular on the field. a smile would form on his lips as he whispered into your ear, “next time, we have to have a proper makeout, just to make sure we win, yeah?”

yet, right now, the air between you two is frigid. there are no giggles and no playful touches as you cover him in kisses. no, you both stand there and look everywhere but at each other. mason doesn’t leave right away, unsure if he should. you had never been one to deny him his good luck kiss, surely today wouldn’t be the start. arguments come and go but this was your tradition. he knew that you knew what it meant to him. yet, as you showed no indication of leaning in to give him his kisses, he figured he’d take on the role today.

look. you didn’t mean to turn your head, causing his kiss to land on your cheek. you swear it! you had seen him lean down and (secretly) felt relieved that today would have some normalcy, with your good luck kisses. but all too soon, you remembered how mason had refused to listen to you in the heat of the argument. instead of trying to talk things out and think of a solution, he had told you to “grow up” and walked away. like a switch, your anger and bitterness had come back with a vengeance. and like a reflex, your head turned when his lips came crashing down. 

you’ll admit, it was a petty move. you don’t really regret it though, anger still bubbling from his childish behaviour. if he wanted to be childish, so could you. 

you don’t regret it, that is until you see the look on masons face. your rejection of his kiss feels like the ultimate betrayal to him. the hurt in his eyes and his dejected expression have you second guessing everything you’ve ever done. 

“oh,” masons voice is small, but not as small as he feels at the moment. his face has fallen and his heart feels stripped bare. his sad pout is more present than ever. when he speaks, it's a mere whisper, “okay then.”

you’re not doing any better, all the hard feelings you had moments ago were looking very dumb. the look on his face had you ready to fold and forgive him. you had to hold yourself back from reaching for his hand and pulling him into your arms, kissing him until you were pulled apart. you just… couldn't. 

maybe you were too stubborn, but so was he. plus, you still felt you were owed an apology. he was the one in the wrong, the culprit in this stupid argument. you had to remain strong, even if all you wanted was to kiss the sorrows from his face. 

with one final (heartbreaking) glance towards you, mason turns to head into the locker room. and with that, you half heartedly head to the designated seating area for family and friends. 

it’s just a silly tradition mason and I have. we only do it because it gives us a reason to unashamedly make out. it’s not like our kissing sessions affect if chelsea actually wins or not, you tell yourself as you find your seat. 

soon enough, you’re eating your words. you don’t know if you should cover your eyes or turn your head away from the crime scene unfolding in front of you. the way chelsea is being annihilated by the opposing team, you’re dumbstruck. mason is a whole different story, playing like (in the kindest way possible) shit. it’s a sea of cards and missed shots. the ball gets stolen from him more times than you could count and his frustration is evident. he’s throwing fits and cussing out no one in particular as he walks the field. 

by the time the final whistle is blown, you’re grateful the bloodbath is done with. you’re not sure how you feel about what just happened. the one time I didn’t kiss mason, they really did lose, you mull over this. it can’t really be connected, right?

-

nonetheless, as you make your way towards the locker room, you’ve had time to think things over. you’re much more calm than when you left mason two hours ago, and all you want to do is kiss him and end this stupid argument. you’ll even be the one to swallow your pride and apologise if you have to, you just need things to go back to normal. heck, you even took off the hoodie and are proudly showing off the nineteen on your back. maybe that’ll ease the blow a bit. you can’t stop thinking of the hurt look he gave you when you rejected his kiss, and you can already imagine the horrid mood he’ll be in after the end results of the match. he’s already had such a difficult time with all his contract drama, another team loss is the last thing he needed.

waiting outside the locker room, you offer sympathetic smiles as all the boys start to walk out. mason is one of the last ones to exit, looking down at the ground as he walks. when he looks up and sees you, your heart wants to shatter into a million pieces. his dejected expression and ever present pout actually hurt you. 

“you didn’t kiss me,” he whispers matter-of-factly, as he comes to a halt in front of you. he’s still refusing to meet your gaze. he mumbles towards his shoes, “you didn’t kiss me and they kicked our arses out there.”

“what?” you’re baffled, having thought his sour mood would be due solely to the team's loss, or even to his mid performance. you hadn’t thought the lack of kisses between you had gotten to him so badly.

he finally looks at you, and it's like a shot to the heart. his eyes are filled with sadness and frustration and so much hurt. he states it as if it's the most obvious thing in the world, “you didn’t give me my good luck kiss. you turned away, so I played like shit.”

oh my, your heart might burst. my sweet, precious boy, I don’t deserve you. this situation is so pathetically heartbreaking and you hate to see him so sad over something you did. it’s all too much, the way he genuinely believes your kisses could control the outcome of the game and his performance. 

“my baby,” you’re wrapping your arms around him in an instant. automatically, he reciprocates the action and nuzzles his face into you. you begin to rub his back, trying to ease his breathing and relax him a bit. after a few moments in this embrace, you nudge him from his hiding spot in the crook of your neck and hold his face with both hands. you leave a kiss on the tip of his nose, “i’m so, so sorry. it’ll never happen again.”

he simply nods and offers you a slight smile. in return, you place a soft kiss on his jaw and on at the lobe of his ear. you leave another kiss on his cheek and one on his forehead. soon enough, you’re both lost in a haze of kisses. when you hear him let out a soft laugh, your heart strings ease up. 

yes, this is how it should be. no arguments and rejected kisses. there should just be laughter and intertwined hands and soft kisses and happiness. 

trying to lighten his mood even more, you look around before you lean in towards his ear. you fake whisper, “please don’t tell the other boys I didn’t kiss you today. I don’t want them to start forcing us to kiss in front of them before every game, like some sort of kissing cult sacrifice show.”

he gasps and puts on a (not so) fake offended face, “why not?”

[alder-saan]

His sister .2

Larissa Weems x normie! reader

link part 1

NSFW, heavy smut, almost only smut, pwp, masturbation, fingering, cunnilingus, shapeshifting cock, dom! Larissa, sub! reader, mistress kink, reader being tied with Larissa's stockings, blind kink, breeding kink, usage of safe word, fluff towards the end, aftercare.

words count: 3.5k

A/N: I'm sorry it took me soooooo long to write, and also, I know I'm not the best at writing smut but I try, okay? (yes, writing some pwp wasn't the best idea but eh)

You had spent the afternoon thinking about her, without being able to touch her, without being able to look at her too much, since Philip was there. He had taken the afternoon off to show Larissa around the city. Your husband, his sister and you went to the museum, which he never took you to because he always told you to be on your own.

You spent the evening trying to be alone with Larissa.

Philip was faster than Larissa and you, which gave you time to try something. You couldn’t focus on the paintings anyway. While she was looking at one, you sat next to her, on the bench seat, your hand brushing hers. She did not take her eyes off the picture, and she did not move her hand, but a faint smile lit up her face. Butterflies swarmed in your stomach. She was so beautiful, her smile was so beautiful, and it was even more, knowing you were the one who caused it.

“Darling, you should at least pretend to look at the artworks…”

Lord, the pet name. She was driving you crazy. 

“You are an artwork, Larissa,” you replied, fluttering your eyelashes.

She let out a slight chuckle and moved her hand to your thigh. You shivered when you felt her hand slowly finding a way under your skirt. Her fingers ran over your tights, and your skin tensed under the electrical touch.

“You little flirt, do I have to remind you that your husband is in the next room?”

She was still looking at Nero, looking at Roma burning in his golden frame, while playing with you, lingering her fingers closer and closer to your inner thigh, going back, drawing small circles on your knee, and then coming again on your inner thigh. You couldn’t help but hold your breath each time her fingers passed near your panties. Wet. Of course.

“I wish he wasn’t” you whispered, trying to hide the arousal in your voice.

“I do so, Love. I'm staying with you for the week, so please be patient.”

She removed her hand, and you clenched your legs together, trying to keep the feeling of her fingers on you. You watched her standing up, and bending down to your ear.

“Be a good girl and you’ll be rewarded.”

With that, she walked away, as if nothing just happened, leaving you as red as the Roman emperor’s toga on the painting.

That night, you tried to sleep, but every time you’d close your eyes, she was there, demanding you to be a good girl. You could still feel her hand on your thigh, and you wanted so much more. That was probably not what a good girl would do but… She would never know, would she? Your hands reached your breasts, and you massaged them, while an imaginary Larissa was kissing your neck, leaving imaginary red lips stains, and imaginary fingers were lingering on your thighs, drawing small circles closer and closer to your cunt. What if she left red marks on your thighs too? You opened your legs and imagined her in between, kissing them, licking them, slowly going up your shanks and thighs.

“Be a good girl for me, Darling,” she’d say.

“Yes, yes I’m a good girl” you whispered in your bed “Please, please fuck me.”

“So needy…”

Your hand went down your belly, and you circled your clit with your fingers, imagining Larissa's tongue doing this. Your other hand was still massaging your breast. You wanted to moan aloud, but your husband was right next to you, and you couldn’t risk waking him. So you continued, entering two fingers into your pussy. Your fingers moved inside you, almost automatically, as you knew what gave you pleasure. You wondered if she was thinking about you… Maybe she was touching herself like you were doing. Maybe she was moaning your name, in her room, legs spread, a hand between them.

Imagining her masturbating turned you even more on. You yearned to feel her soft pale skin under your hands, to grab her breast, to kiss her red lips, her neck, her belly. You wanted to be between those gorgeous legs, tasting her pussy while she’d bury her fingers into your hair, whining, moaning.

You desired to worship her divine body.

You woke up in the morning, much later than you usually did. The sun was not brushing the skin on your arm. The sunlight was already on the floor. You yawned and got up. A shirt put on, you went out of your room, only to notice Larissa was there, sitting on the couch in the living room. You blushed, remembering what you imagined last night, and realising you were entirely naked under your oversize shirt, while she was perfectly dressed and made up. But she hadn’t fixed her hair in her usual updo, and the silver locks were falling on her shoulders. It was… ethereal.

“Good morning, Larissa.”

“Good morning, Darling. Did you enjoy your night?”

Your face went even redder. Did she know? How?

“Uh…” you cleared your throat “Yes, I did, thank you, what about you? Did you sleep well?”

“Not really I’m afraid,” she said, grabbing the mug on the little table near the sofa.

“Oh, I’m sorry. Why did you have a bad night? Maybe I can help-”

“I never said I had a bad night, Dear. To be honest, it was pretty lovely, thinking about you.”

“Oh uh… ah!” 

Had she… thought about you in THAT way? By the way, you had been thinking about her all night? You were bright red, remembering your night.

“Come on, sit with me.”

She put her hand on the couch, next to her.

“I’m- I get dressed and I-”

“No, you can stay in your shirt… I like the view.”

She wasn’t even trying to hide her look on your legs. You swallowed, seeing her blue eyes running up your legs. You tried to show her a confident smile and came to sit next to her. She put the mug back on the table and her hand came to your knee. It was warm. Your heart skipped a beat under her soft gaze.

“Philip told me he wouldn’t be there for lunch… that means we are alone all day.”

“Oh… uh, that’s cool”

You couldn’t focus on anything, her thumb brushing the skin on your thigh. Your whole body was warming, your heart was racing.

“Do you know what I was thinking about, tonight?”

Her hand travelled slowly to your inner thigh.

“Uh, no? I don’t?” You hated how shy you sounded.

“I was thinking about you, crying my name while I destroyed you.”

She moved her fingers closer and closer to your aching core. You let out a little whine and blushed, hearing it.

“Yes, quite like that, Darling.”

She caught your lips with hers, a hand on your chest to lay you on the couch. Her knee went between your legs, and her hands took your wrists.

Thumb, thumb, thumb, thumb, went your heart against your ribcage.

You couldn’t believe you were under her, while two seconds before you were still standing. Her sapphire eyes stared at you, her smooth knee coming closer and closer to your pussy, moving the shirt up your legs, your cheeks, tickled by Larissa’s silver hair, warmed, and you bet they were bright red. As she deepened the kiss, a moan escaped from your throat. Her tongue brushed yours, and you buried your fingers into her locks. She only broke the kiss because you were breathless.

“Darling, I’m gonna destroy you. If at one point you want me to stop, say ‘red’, and I’ll stop at that very second, okay?”

You nodded, feeling the heat getting to your lower belly. ‘Destroy’ on her lips sounded good to your ears, and the way she said it, so calm, so still the way she’d say ‘I like tea’, made it sound even better. It was a fact. She was going to destroy you. And you were going to enjoy it.

“I want to hear you, dear. Is that okay?”

“O-okay,” you whispered

“I didn’t hear you.”

“Okay!”

“Good girl,” she purred, “now strip.”

You unbuttoned your shirt one by one. She was watching you, her pupil growing larger. It seemed to be too slow to her taste because she pushed your hands away to do it herself, almost ripping the fabric off… Her lips crashed onto yours, her hands massaged your naked breasts. Your cunt was dripping against her knee, and you bucked your hips to make it stimulate your clit. She stopped touching you.

“Pet, here I’m in command. You are not allowed to do anything. Understood?”

“Yes.”

“Yes, mistress.”

“Yes, mistress.”

“Good pet.”

She kissed your breasts, licking one of your nipples, sucking it. Her tongue on your skin was so soft. You whined in half pain, half pleasure when she nibbled your bosom. Your fingers dug into her back. She sucked your skin so hard you knew you would have dark red marks at these spots.

You wanted to touch her, as she touched you. You wanted to feel her soft skin, to taste it. Your hands went down her back and tried to slip under her skirt. Larissa sighed against your breasts.

“Don’t make me tie you, pet.”

“Was that supposed to be a threat?” you whispered while caressing her skin under the fabric.

She laughed, her lips against your skin, and her breath tickled you. She moved up your chest and neck, her lips brushing against you, ending near your ear and parting to murmur.

“Such a little slut who wants to be tied while I fuck her.”

“Yes, Mistress, I want to be tied while you fuck me, please!” you squealed

“A well-mannered slut, then.”

While sucking and licking your neck and your earlobe, she removed her skin tone stockings. Both of your hands were caught in her grasp and tied with one of her long socks. The other, she used it to fasten your wrists to the couch. You knew you could move, you could untie you. The stockings were elastic enough for you to go. But you didn’t want to. You wanted her to use you.

She directly spread your legs and put her head in between to kiss your thighs, making you shudder each time her lips met your skin. She gently nibbled it, and then her tongue drew a path to your cunt. She teased your folds with it, humming at the scent and taste of your arousal.

“You taste so good, pet”

You whined at the sound of her voice, and she chuckled.

“And you’re already so wet…”

She was right, she had barely touched you and you were already at the edge. She lapped your clit, and you whined at the sudden sensation. She smiled against your pussy, and you moaned at the waves of heat that went through your whole body. She grabbed your ass with her hands and teased your little bundle of nerves with her tongue. You let out sinful whines, much louder than you ever could imagine sounding. She hummed against your cunt and sucked your clit. You were squirming to try to feel as much pleasure as possible, to be in the best possible position. She tsked.

“Don’t move, pet.”

You immediately stopped, and she purred against your pussy,. Her tongue and lips tickled your clit again, and soon you knew you were about to come.

“M- Mistress I-”

“Wait, pet. I’ll tell you when you may come.”

She continued licking your clit, and you tried to hold. But it was almost hurting you, at this point.

“P- Please, ah, Mistress, please, let me…”

“Such a good girl, begging me like this… You may come, pet.”

And you came on your couch, Larissa’s head between your thighs. Your heart was hammering in your ears, and you slowly caught your breath. You began to move but she pinned you against the sofa.

“I’m not done with you, pet.”

You were still breathless, but your cunt didn’t care. It wanted Larissa again. You watched her unbutton her shirt.

“What’s that look for, pet?”

You closed your watering mouth.

“What look?”

“You look like you want to eat me up. Your turn will come, pet. But for now, let me take care of you.”

You stared at her chest, hidden by red _matching her lips_ and lace bras. She bent over you and placed her shirt on your face.

“Wha-”

“Relax, pet.”

She tied the sleeves behind your head. The texture of the fabric, the fabric you knew was on her skin just a moment before, was so soft on your cheeks. It now covered your eyes, you could only see a blue light passing through the blue shirt. You tried to guess where she was by watching the shadows passing on it. She was near, she was near your head, at the right of it. You felt her lips on your neck, once again. So she was right there.  The fact you didn’t know exactly where she was scared you a little but also aroused you. Her hands wandering on your chest, her tongue lingering on your neck made you more and more needy for her. But what turned you on the most, was imagining she could do anything with you. You could never know what part of your body she was kissing next. Was it your breasts? No, your stomach. Then maybe your neck again? No, your lips.

She kissed your whole body like this, specifically avoiding the aching part between your legs. Then her fingers brushed against your belly. You gasped as her fingertips awoke in you hundreds of butterflies by simply touching your skin. 

She parted your legs, by simply touching your ankles. She sat between them. One of her hands stayed on your ankle and passed under it. Now it slowly moved towards your calf and reached your popliteal fossa. She lifted it, high enough to place it on her shoulder. She lowered her hands lengthwise to your soft thigh and placed a kiss on your knee.

You sighed in pleasure as you understood she was going to fuck you again. Her fingertips teased your soaked folds, coating them with your arousal. She continued for a few seconds, and you whined. 

"What's wrong, pet?" she innocently said.

"Please…"

"Please what? Pet, I can't guess what you want."

"I need you… inside me… Mistress, please."

She entered two fingers deep inside your drenched cunt and you squealed. She removed them and sank them, again and again, the rhythm clouding your mind. You moaned, covering the wet noises her fingers produced going in and out of your pussy.

"M…More," you whined, "Mistress, please."

Your walls fluttered around her phalanxes, and she crooked them inside you. You were so sensitive, she was already driving you near the edge. Her fingers twirled inside you, knowing exactly where your most sensitive spot was. She most definitely had had dozens and dozens of partners, she knew how to please a woman, and the idea of being one of these women turned you even more on. Your whole body was shaking, and you were sure the neighbour could hear your screams.

"Mistress I-"

She continued tickling you.

"Yes, pet?"

"I'm gonna… Please, let-let me come"

"Alright, pet, come on my fingers."

Something snapped inside you. The heat reached your whole body, and you let it out, moaning her name.

Her fingers left the place to an aching void in your cunt, and you heard a sucking noise, and then she hummed in delight. She was licking your arousal on her hand.

"I-I wish you had a strap-on right now," you panted out.

"Do you?" she asked, "do you want me to take you with my cock?"

"Yes…" you whispered.

She took your hand and led it to the soft skin of her stomach, and she lowered it. You first felt her lace panties _when did she have removed her skirt? You didn't know_ and then a lump between her legs.

"I don't need any strap-on, pet," she growled.

You let out a little cry of surprise.

"Want me to take you?"

"Y-yes, please."

"Mmmh, good pet," she purred.

You heard the sound of fabric slipping on skin, she was removing her panties. Then, you felt something hard and hot on your thigh, making you shudder. But she didn’t touch you more than that. You saw a shadow passing over you. She most likely was leaning over you, but you didn’t know why. Suddenly, your hands could move. They were still tied together, true, but they weren’t attached to the couch anymore. She placed her hands on your back and lifted it until you were sitting. Then her hands reached your waist, and she led you on her laps. You were still blinded by her shirt, you couldn’t see anything, but you felt her _hard_ dick against your inner thighs, and that you were coating it with your arousal. Your teeth sank into your lower lip at the touch of it. Your legs, on either side of her waist, tried to clench together, and you placed your still tied hands behind her head, your arms on either side of her neck. She approached your head, and her nipples brushed against the underside of your breasts. You rut your clit against her tip, stimulating you.

“Stop that, pet, I’m in command here,” She whispered in your ear.

"I'm sorry mistress," you squealed.

She growled and bit your neck licking your skin, sucking it. Her hardness against your inner thigh was unbearable at this point. You could feel the heat against your slit, and you wanted nothing but to feel it inside your slit.

“Please, take me.”

“So needy.”

She firmly grabbed your ass with one of her hands, and with the other, helped her cock enter in you. You hummed in delight, tilting your head back, exposing your neck to her, neck she willingly kissed and sucked as if it was nothing but a candy. You undulated against her, feeling her filling you. Her second hand took your ass, and she helped you engage the movement of rocking your hips against her. 

“You feel so good around me, pet, so good…” she husked.

She buried her head in your breasts, her fingers dug into your hips. The slight pain you felt made you moan. She tightened her grip, and started pounding you on her laps. Your back arched even more _as if it was even possible_ making her hit the right spot each time.

“Fuck,” she moaned.

“Kiss me, aah, p-lease, k-kiss me,” you panted out.

She captured your lips with hers, they were wet. Your tongue brushed against hers, and you swallowed her moans as well as she swallowed your whines, that you released in the rhythm of your thighs clashing against her laps. Your arousal was dripping on her cock, that was filling every inch of you. The heat you felt in your lower belly seemed insatiable. You wanted it to go faster, so you accelerated the pounding, and she bit your lower lip.

“You like that, riding your husband’s sister’s dick, right?”

“Yes,” you almost cried, unashamed.

“I want to come inside you, pet”

Your legs were shaking. You wanted her to fill you with her cum, to make you hers. But it took a few seconds for your clouded mind to process things.

“Do it, please ”

She pressed you against her, your breasts crushed against her chest, her lips eating up your neck, she mumbled something you couldn’t understand, too busy moaning your own insanities and her name. She came inside you, and the feeling of her hot cum inside you brought you over the edge. You came too, a few seconds after her, crying.

You tried to catch your breath, and she kissed your shoulders.

“I-I can’t take it anymore,” you breathed out.

“Red?” she asked.

“Yes, red,” you replied.

She untied her shirt, and it fell before your eyes, revealing her head, her messy hair, her blown pupils. Your lips crashed on hers, and you removed your hands from the stockings that held them, breathing heavily.

“You did so good for me, darling,” she whispered against your lips, “now let’s clean you up.”

She helped you stand up, as your legs were weak.

“Do you want to… take a bath with me?” you asked.

“If you’re offering,” she kissed your nose. 

You took her hand and walked to the bathroom, in which you filled the bathtub with hot water and a bit of this lemon perfume you liked. She entered the water and you laid against her, your head on her shoulder, your body between her legs. Her arms wrapped your waist, and you closed your eyes. She was so soft… She gently kissed your hair.

“Sorry, I couldn’t… continue.” you said.

“You have been perfect,” she replied, “It’s okay, and what you did is already a lot. Moreover, we have all week…”

____________________________________

I KNOW I TOOK SOOOOOOO MUCH TIME!

tag list: @dejavucatcher @yourfavoriteweirdo19 @thoroughly--confused @bobia13 @enchantressb @friedryes @dvrkhcld @weemssapphic @mountain-bikingwitch @philip-15 @tallwomenslaytheday @milfomaniac @larissaweemsgf

I'm sorry if I forgot to mention you <3

[wooahaes]

melted sugar

pairing: non-idol!hyunjin x gn!reader

genre: fluff + established relationship

word count: 0.7k~

warnings: food mentions. hyunjin down horrendous.

daisy's notes: men......... <3

Hyunjin liked to linger behind you as he watched you work carefully. Sure, he couldn’t help you with making candy, but… It was fascinating to see you work your magic. 

Chris had invited the two of you to this little spooky get-together about a week or two ago now, and the day had finally arrived. You’d brought up making your own Halloween candy that day, too, and—with Chris’s permission and any allergies taken into account—you’d woken up this morning with the plans to spend the next few hours hard at work. Hyunjin had come in shortly after, standing by to supervise (more-so in the ‘make sure you don’t burn the shit out of yourself’ way than anything else) with his phone next to him in case of emergencies. 

He rested his head in his hand, watching as you were now working with melted sugar. You’d already made fudge the night before that he’d sliced up into cute little squares. “Why don’t you ever do this for me?”

“You never asked.” 

He felt a tiny smile tug at his lips at how casual you were in saying it. You weren’t exactly wrong, after all. “Would you?”

“Make you candy?” You glanced over your shoulder for a moment, and then shrugged as you turned back to your work. “I dunno. Maybe for your birthday or something. It’s kind of a hassle sometimes, but I’d do it for you.”

His heart swelled at the sentiment, so sweetly spoken as simple as anything else. Sure, he could maybe lovingly nag you a little for openly doing this for Chris’s party of all things (do you like him more than me?), but he knew you’d just repeat your little ‘you never asked’ statement again. He smiled a little wider, head resting in his hands as he admired you while you weren’t looking. Hyunjin wasn’t afraid to admire you openly, sure, but he liked having these little moments. It reminded him of how the two of you were before you started dating, where Hyunjin admired you from afar and caught himself thinking often about the way your eyes glittered with joy over things like this. He’d watched you draw out your designs for other things that he could help you decorate with little piping bags. 

Maybe one day the two of you could decorate shortbread cookies together. He’d seen plenty of those little videos of people decorating them in elaborate ways… Maybe you could teach him. The two of you could draw up designs together, and he’d use it as an excuse to stay close to you for a while. Not that he needed the excuse: he was just fine with doing what he was doing now. He liked sharing this space with you and admiring you hard at work. If he listened closely, he could always hear you softly singing under your breath as you worked. It always made him want to get closer to you. When you were cooking normally, he would: he’d come up behind you, and settle in to watch you work, arms wrapped around your frame. But not, with you working with sugar… He’d save it for later.

He glanced over to the squares of fudge, placed just out of his reach. The moment he began to stretch his arm out, you looked up—not at him, but as though you’d heard him moving despite the fact he swore he was dead silent. A moment later, you look back down, one hand reaching out for the dye near you. Hyunjin smiled to himself, stealing a piece of fudge and popping it into his mouth.

“All you have to do is ask, Jinnie.” 

He nearly choked for a moment, jerking in surprise. “You didn’t even hear me!”

“I can sense it,” you teased. “I made extra. Just don’t go crazy.”

“And if I do?” He smirked, teasing you back. “What if I don’t want to share with the others? Hm? You’re my partner. They should get their own if they want someone to cook for them—” 

Your laugh cut him off there, and he found himself smiling that soft, sappy smile all over again. You’d tease him if you saw it, he knew that you would, so he was enjoying being able to just admire you. “So possessive,” you hummed. “I’m not going anywhere, y’know.”

“I know,” he rested his head in his hand again. The fudge that melted on his tongue… But he would always think that your presence in his life was sweeter.

taglist: @twancingyunhao @weird-bookworm @jinnie-ret

[sylvie-fics]

hiiiii congratulations on getting out of tumblr jail, i liked your valentine fic. maybe something with MH as a father? something about that fic just made me think 🥺👉👈 thnaks Sylvieeee

ooo looks someone noticed something in that fic 👀👀👀

this is for you hun, hope its alright!

Word count: 450

Warnings: mentions of violence. reader uses she/her and is referred to as 'mom'

summary: Viktor's daughter is scary

-----------------------------------------------------

He knew early on. There’s a special kind of crazy the two of you shared– and despite his best efforts to stop this from transferring, he’s failed. Miserably. As the world would have it, the combination of two mad scientists with a complete disregard for safety does not create a sane, safe, generally normal kid. 

“Hurry up. The doll execution was supposed to happen this morning. The others will riot soon.” 

There was a time in his life where he wasn't making child-safe guillotines. Or adding magnets to doll heads so they can be beheaded over and over again– hours worth of fun. Sure, he could just tell his angry five year old, ‘No, I’m not going to make you a guillotine.’ He could. But why would he? How could he bring himself to say no to that? 

“Mom still has to paint blood on it.”

He doesn’t know how she ended up like this. Well, he does. Still, it’s not like he didn’t *try*. He’d read countless books on early childhood development, went through all the parenting pamphlets– he followed it all to a tee. She wasn’t even a particularly difficult kid. Sure, she cried– but it wasn’t excessive. She hit all the developmental marks on time, if not early. 

It's just… once she started being able to verbally express her thoughts. Suddenly it was ‘dad this bedtime story is boring I want something with more violence.’ And then it was ‘your real name isn’t dad, is it? Do you know what happens to liars?’ and then after that ‘dad can I have your bones when you die?’

The thing that baffles him the most– she’s not like this anywhere else. Her Kindergarten teacher says she's a joy, that she's so kind to all her classmates. The little old ladies down the street say she's the most well behaved kid they've ever met. Hell, she gets candy from the local shopkeeper at the parts store at least once a week. 

She’s just like this at home.

He loves this kid so much. Yes, she terrifies him– but if anything ever happened to her, he would kill everyone in the world and then himself. He’s hung up every single drawing. He’s got journals filled with details of their time spent together. Family portraits that he forces the two of you to take multiple times a year– and both of you are huffy about it, but get over it eventually. He can’t help it, he didn’t know ‘fatherhood’ was an emotion. You can’t remove emotions you didn’t know existed.

“Dad stop crying the guillo– the ge– the head choppy thing isn't for you.”

He hates humanity just a bit less now.

[papermonkeyism]

For the new year, I wish I'll get to hang out with people again.

This past year has been, frankly, pretty miserable, specially since early summer-ish when my DnD group went on a months long break. Wasn't the first one, nor the last one, but definetely the worst one. Don't really have other friends locally, aside from one old school mate.

Honestly it's been pretty bad ever since the start of the pandemic when we stopped hanging out outside of DnD sessions and my fave coffee places closed down along with couple of my fave restaurants, and I just... Stopped having a social life, but now it's so much worse. As said, I have one (1) friend outside of the group I sometimes go shopping with, and one of my DnD buddies hangs out with me maybe once a week to borrow my laundry machine for couple hours, and they are probably the only reasons I haven't broken completely so far.

But neither of them are storytelling people the same way I am, so I'm kinda holding back when we hang out, as I can't really go all in with my special interests on them.

Downsides of being socially awkward introvert.

The summer break from roleplaying was a trigger for anxiety and maybe the worst creative block of my life so far. As someone who basically thinks with a sketchbook it was pretty fucking stressful not being able to draw anything for several months!

I crave creation and storytelling, but my brain is made of goo. Like imagine if someone came and asked you to pick a water from a pool and hand it to them? But it's liquid! Can I get a cup or something, but they just scoff. You got hands, right, just pick one up and hand it over. So I'm just left trying to scoop handfuls of wet and grabbing nothing. Kinda how it feels.

Started marathoning Crit Role to distract myself from the worst of it and to have at least some kind of creative energy in my life, and consumed what must be over half a thousand hours of role playing. At least that was fun!

And when nights started stretching and seasonal depression started to creep into my already not-doing-good brain I started my routine of evening walks because at some point I was legitimately going stir crazy enough to explode otherwise.

It's also been my first full year of joblessness in a long while. I was already having hard time by the end of last year, because my brain has difficulty handling full time jobs for long stretches of time, and ten months in a row not being able to recharge was starting to weight on me, so I had made a plan to get my brain sorted out with the ADHD diagnosis and hopefully medication before applying for jobs again, but turns out the process took the entire year, and then some, and I still don't have the meds yet. I have been given the thumbs up on them, but turns out me stressing for the better part of a year has triggered blood pressure problems (runs in my family, so honestly probably just a matter of time, but it's still very inconvenient to happen right now), so I have to sort that out first before it's safe to try stimulant medication.

And then there was the death in the family and a close friend's cancer diagnosis (fingers crossed!) and I just haven't had a great time, you know.

January's going to go into medical stuff in the hope of getting the ADHD meds, so maybe I could one day grab those thoughts again. The unemployment office is also pestering me again, so we'll see how that'll go.

I think I'll see if I can make myself a regular at the new cat cafe in town. Cats make everything better. Also looking forwards to actualizing a tattoo plan or two! Springtime is coming too, eager to continue my evening walk routine with returning sunlight. And I really, really, really need to create something again.

So here's for what I sincerely hope to be a better year than this past one! Cheers.

[emmyrosee]

Here's how I look reading your dad/uncle!au.

Also I would love to hear more about uncle konoha, kiyoomi and kuroo. 🧡

YOURE SO SWEET PLS-

Okay. OkAY.

Before I absolutely unleash hell on my keyboard, let’s start with uncle Konoha because @icedhoneyy really owns that whole domain 👀❤️

But despite what Keiji will tell everyone, and Konoha will show through his actions, the love he has for Mei is absolutely, 1000% unparalleled. When he’s visiting, he’s going full out because it makes her happy, and he’ll do anything for that.

He’s dressed up as a prince and taken her to the movies dressed as such, escorting her and calling her Princess Mei to make her laugh. He’s also dressed up as a princess before, but that was moreso in the beginning, when she was too shy to go out like that alone, and he absolutely was not having that.

The times Keiji has come home with his wife to find Mei curled up against Konoha, her thumb in her mouth and cheeks warm from sleep, it’s almost enough to balance any other ridiculousness Konoha does to drive Keiji nuts, the trust Mei clearly has for him is just so clear that he couldn’t imagine her growing up without Konoha.

Mei calls him Uncle ‘Nori or Uncle Ko, it’s something he’s just learned to reply to and every time he hears it he smiles.

Now… now unCLE KIYOOMI-

He cries. Good god he cries when Atsumu asks him to be Hisako’s godfather. GOD HE CRIES SO HARD-

He went from thinking children were feral creatures to being absolutely obsessed and adoring them, because as terrible as Atsumu annoys Omi, he just… he did so good with raising ‘Sako, and it’s no doubt because he has his better half by his side, but god, Kiyoomi constantly is asking for updates when he hasn’t seen her in a while, and he’s amazed at just how much he loves this kid.

One time, he took her out to dinner when Atsumu had him babysit, just because he wanted to, and he let her order anything she wanted because he knows he’d never be able to say no to that face, and every time she looked up at him with that smile akin to her dad’s, Kiyoomi couldn’t imagine being anywhere else. He makes it a thing to do it every few weeks, and every time he’s presented with a new drawing of the two of them crudely drawn at tables with various foods on top of them.

Kiyoomi hides one in his gym bag and he’s not crying yOU ARE ATSUMU-

Every now and again, when Hisako thinks his hair gets too long, she makes him sit down in her salon- a beanbag chair with a blanket Osamu bought her years ago draped over his chest- and she uses butterfly clips and tiny rubber elastics to tie his hair back in various ways. If he spends the night, Hisako will do it first thing in the morning, and Kiyoomi will keep the clips in until the end of practice because gdi they did help-

SpeaKING OF HAIR because Kiyoomi has such specific curls (I think he’s like, 3b?) Hisako LOVES when uncle Kiyoomi does her hair because he’s so gentle and so attentive with it, he knows how to take care of it and make it all pretty, and it drives Atsumu crazy because she doesn’t want him to do her hair at all anymore.

Hisako calls Kiyoomi Uncle Kiyo or Uncle Omi, and he loves it so much.

NOW. *cracks knuckles* uncle Kuroo. The loml. Baby Kozume’s love of her life. The bane of Kenma’s existence.

He literally just. GOD WHERE DO I START-

Okay. When he finds out that Kenma’s family is growing, he absolutely loses his mind because he never thought that he’d want kids, so the minute kenmas like “yeah and I kinda was hoping you wanted to be their godfather too-“ kuroo nearly breaks Kenma’s poor back from squeezing too damn hard.

Literally anything, ANYTHING Kenma’s other half needs or wants, he’s on it, already ordered it online to have it sent to them; it’s not that Kenma’s incapable or unwilling, it’s just that Kuroo so badly wants to be part of Tiny Kozume’s life and he’s not willing to miss any parts of it.

Now when baby Kenma is bORN-

She’s absolutely obsessed with uncle Kuroo. Comparable to that of Baby Miya. The absolute way she lights up when Kuroo is around is ridiculous. Anytime she hears his voice over FaceTime or speaker, she whines to find him. Kenma invested in one of those like. Baby monitors that notify when the baby has flipped or spoken, and every. Time. Kuroo. Gets a ding. He texts Kenma because his nEICE IS SO COOL KENMA WTF-

“Kuroo she jusT COOED IN HER SLEEP GO TO BED-“

Every time he comes to visit, he cries when he has to leave because she gets so much bigger every time he comes back, he misses it and he misses everything for so many different reasons and he’s just. He gets so upset every time, and there’s this little brunette munchkin with eyes just like her dad’s who’s squishing his cheeks and giggling when he leans down to smother her in affection.

Once she starts to get older, she absolutely ropes poor Kuroo into giving Kenma a heart attack because how could he say NO to that FACE, and while Kenma is such a good dad- god he is and you can’t convince me otherwise- he’s one of those parents that are like “okay, if you jump off the slide and get hurt, you’re gonna learn really quick to not jump off the slide.” Right?? Like he’ll mend the wounds and kiss her cheek and his heart will break, but. Idk. He just seems like the type man to warn his kids but let them learn for themselves ya feel me?

While Kuroo spRINTS across the playground to catch baby Kenma before she can hit the ground because he’d rather break every rib in his body than have to watch her bottom lip wobble in pain.

“Kuro, I had my eye on her, she was fine-“

“Uh no, yOU were blinking as soon as she leapt how dare you not be vigilant-“

One time, Kuroo was house sitting for the two adult Kozume’s, and he was just watering the plants and cleaning up from breakfast when the hairs on the back of his neck suddenly stand up.

He looks over his shoulder and sees the door to the pantry open, and he knows baby Kenma’s favorite snacks are on the top shelf, and he BOOKS- I mean absolutely DASHES- it to the pantry as baby Kenma falls to the floor, literally catching her like he was out of some cartoon.

Baby Kenma cries from the fear, clinging to Kuroo’s arms, he sighs in THE MOST relief, noticing how much it hurts to breathe and he’s going to have to get that checked, but right now all that matters is baby Kenma is safe, and now he’s gotta bribe the three year old to not tell her father why Uncle Kuroo’s ribs are broken-

She calls him Uncle Tetsu or Uncle ‘Roo, and he sobs the first time she does

Ugh. I literally just.

I have to shut up, I’ll go on for hours mate.

[ganymedian]

This has been a breakdown of my activities or the past few years. TW for cancer and death

—

In 2019, I had moved into our first apartment since moving to Massachusetts. I acquired an iPad and it's been a quality of life improvement for me as an artist and as someone who enjoys watching videos while I clean.

My grandfather died. It might have been the same day I was given the apartment tour. It was a Saturday. He couldn’t remember who was missing.

—

I got a pay bump in November from our pharmacy changing over after the buyout.

Covid was on the radar. My paternal grandmother passed away. The year before she passed, she would drive me home from work and tell me the same stories about shops that her and her brother would visit after school. She stopped being able to recognize the stores she told me about every week. She drove me far out of town one day and I couldn't stop her; she insisted there was a McDonalds nearby and wanted to take me there.

My parents inherited a home, the hub of family gatherings, that had more problems than they could afford to fix. My childhood is on the market.

—

In 2020. Pharmacy work was more leisurely than it had ever been in my cumulative 3.5 years of being in the field. We had time to work on the clinical side of patient care. It felt like a respectable healthcare profession and not an assembly line. I spent hundreds of hours playing duolingo to learn Spanish. Es lo que es.

My brother had cancer. A few months later, now my mother has it. She’s been fighting stage 4 for two years. It was probably caught too late. She had handled the signs like she does with everything else: ignore it and tolerate it until it boils over.

I don't understand how I feel about it. She went out of her way to make everyone miserable even before now. I used to want something to happen to her that would make her more compassionate, reasonable, understanding. Facing her mortality has not changed her.

(My brother is ok now)

—

In 2021, I took an immunization training class. I’m licensed to administer covid and flu vaccines. I’ve given what feels like a few thousand vaccines at the time I'm writing this. I had surgery in October. The six paid weeks I had off was the first vacation I had since starting the job. Recalling the amount of free time, organizing, and drawing I did makes me long for another one. Perhaps I’ll have another one! (I do use my PTO now)

However, the cost of transportation between my apartment and Boston for follow up care has set me back. I had to use credit. I’m still fighting to break even between interest and minimum payment.

(But thanks to my diligence, my credit score is good and I’m working on a way out. In spite of financial hardship, I do not regret it.)

—

In 2022 I've been dxed by another psych with Bipolar 2, so we have 3 strikes for ASD and 2 for Bipolar 2. I begged my psych not to put me on SSRIs and SNRIs because I had finally gotten over the severe anhedonia that 3 of those gave me.

Live Laugh Lamotrigine.

I've made friends with the maintenance guy and his mother who lives on-site. He's also an antique fanatic who dresses in late Victorian-Edwardian fashion 24/7. We go antique shopping every so often.

He has unsettling and intense eye contact. Oh god.

Work is out of control again. I can't wait until everyone has had their boosters. I'm so grateful for them but they're making the normal duties of my job a nightmare difficulty. ;-; I'm not getting paid extra to give vaccines and maintain the license. I will see if my displeasure for retail pharmacy is strong enough to make me go to school.

We got a new kitten. We just fixed him.

He is driving me crazy. H e l p

[anonymous-ace72]

So let's talk about Tokyo Mew Mew New

So first of all, apologies to everyone who followed me for anything else because I’m gonna be reverting back to 13 year old Sam for the duration that this show is going for lol. 

Second of all, I’m just honestly ecstatic and my inner child is screeching.

When I first found the original anime, the series had already been finished for like, ten years. An old friend of mine found the first episode on youtube and sent me the link via email. There wasn’t much of an active fanbase in 2013 from what I could see, but I like to think that it was my first internet fanbase. It was also the first anime I was exposed to (aside from a few episodes of Pokémon from a vhs tape back when I was like, 4). I wasn’t much for fanfiction but you can bet your ass that I consumed just about every youtube amv, took about every quotev quiz (and even made a few myself) and dug through every page of google images. A good chunk of my early oc’s came from this show, and I still use most of them (though they are mew mew’s no longer. I might be willing to draw a few of them again with modifications).  I have many fond memories of roleplaying and making up stories of said oc’s with my friend (even though we no longer speak), as well as pretending to have a crush on Kisshu because my friend had a crush on him and I wanted to feel like I was hip and cool (I wasn’t). My first official piece of fandom merch was Ichigo’s bell collar, I made my dad buy me the original Tokyopop manga set, and I just recently was able to get myself the first Kodansha manga at a con. I tried to make a Littlest Pet Shop version to post on youtube, using that manga set as the script and stayed up till 3 AM making props and figuring out which of my little plastic figurine’s would be who (fun fact, I got two episodes in and then promptly deleted my youtube channel when people from school found it. I still have the videos on my old laptop. No you cannot see them). I made tons of fanart on drawcast, most of which has been sadly lost to time when the app shut down a year or so ago. I made one of those truth or dare stories that for some reason got really fucking popular (look it up. It’s the first option on google, somehow. No I don’t know how that happened, it’s on wattpad under the user spirit_writes).

I’m super excited to see where this reboot is going to go. I already love how everyone looks and how the characters are being presented. I’m glad Aoyama is more than just a wooden puppet (I never understood the hate for him, but yeah he was a bit bland looking back). I feel for Lettuce, because back in middle school I was her, and sometimes I still feel like her even now. We love our chaotic alien bastard child, and I can already see he’s going to be particularly unhinged and I love it.

Seriously, look at this little shit. Iconic.

I’m curious for Deep Blue's appearance, because he scared the shit out of me as a teen, and I am mildly curious to see how they work with him this time around (I can’t being to explain why he scared me so much, maybe it’s because of those crazy-ass faces he was pulling in those final episodes, maybe it’s because I had a nightmare where he was strangling me to death. Maybe it's because I was a little bitch. But seriously, wtf man).

I can’t wait to see what stays the same and what may change; even though I pretty much know what’s going to happen, it’s like watching it for the first time. It somehow feels very special to see it as it airs and watch the events unfold week by week. I like feeling like I can finally be a part of this series that consumed so much of my life when I was a young teenager, rather than watching it all over a decade after it ended initially.

The first few episodes are definitely promising. I can’t wait to see where we go from here. 

[ahappybeginning]

Hi 😊👋

I promise I haven’t forgotten about this blog. In fact, it’s been on my mind constantly for the past few weeks. But due to a very intense streak of bad luck, and being thrown into constant chaos and uncertainty, I didn’t have the mental capacity to post here. Or even WHAT to post here, because it became a game of “I know nothing except exhaustion and frustration and no other concrete answers.”

But I’m going to go out on a limb here and post an update, hoping against all hope that I don’t accidentally jinx myself and screw everything up AGAIN.

So…the last month and a half in a nutshell:

My mom and sister both got COVID just under two weeks before my surgery date of Sept. 12. I locked myself in my room for 10 days and only came out when absolutely necessary, and wore my gloves, mask, and shoes at all times.

Miraculously, I did NOT get COVID. HOWEVER, I made it all the way to going to the hospital (an hour away) 3 days before surgery to do the COVID test and registration, did all the paperwork, etc. They had to draw blood because my last results were too old. So later that day I get a call from my surgeon’s office that the blood results showed that my white blood cells were way too high, and they couldn’t safely perform the surgery as scheduled.

I spent a TERRIFYING 3 days trying to figure out what could possibly be causing the issue, because I had no pain, no fever, no other symptoms that I was aware of. So my brain of course went to worst case scenarios like leukemia or something equally scary. In the end (and multiple rounds of being poked for more blood work later), it was a gum infection.

Got to a dentist ASAP and got on an antibiotic and was given a special mouthwash to help. The infection cleared up by the following week.

Went to have my blood checked AGAIN, and the WBC level was still a bit elevated, but it was actually lower than a previous result back in June, which my surgeon hadn’t been concerned about.

Called the surgeon’s office to relay the information, the nurse (who is the primary person I’ve been dealing with) said she’d leave the results on the surgeon’s desk, but I might not hear anything official until the following week.

WELL, the exact day I was supposed to hear something was the same day everything in my area closed because there was a hurricane heading right for us. So…I panicked because I didn’t want to have to wait to hear what was going on. Tried to get some kind of information through the Facebook support group specifically for my surgeon’s patients (and run by members of his staff), but I got nowhere.

Hurricane Ian made landfall just about 20 miles south of me. Our area didn’t get the absolute worst of it but there was still significant damage in the area and most everyone lost power. Thankfully we made it through without any major issues and got our power back after 3 days.

So after finally getting ahold of the office the following week, and a bit of back and forth with getting all the blood work results sent over and being sure the main reason for the WBC being so high was the infection, I FINALLY got a new surgery date of October 20th. It’s a month and a half later than originally scheduled, and it being that late makes things much more complicated work-wise, but I’m just PRAYING that this one holds, and there aren’t any other crazy unexpected bumps in the road to getting this surgery finally.

So…there’s so much more I could say about everything, and I’m gonna try to make another post before Thursday to break down some of what I’m feeling at this point, because I feel like it’s important to document each phase, and I’ll want to be able to look back at it in the future. But for now, after over a month of being stuck in the worst and most frustrating limbo of my life while dodging multiple life threatening issues all at once, I’m VERY happy to be in the “moving forward” part of this again.

Oh, and current weight loss total is 93 lbs, in about 5 1/2 months. Every one of my doctors has told me I’m a superstar, and I’m not even ashamed to admit that yes, I damn well AM a superstar, and I’ve never been more proud of myself. ✨

[twistednuns]

July 2023

Four days in the Manú Rainforest. This trip really didn't start out ideal when my phone fell out of my bag, straight into the river. The crazy thing though: when we went river tubing, Ángel checked the spot again and found it! It had been in the river for two days and it still showed signs of life. Incredible. What I learned: I need to stop looking for distractions, trying to use other people to manage my emotions, and seeing my life trough a camera lens. // More good stuff: Ron teaching me Sanskrit in the van. / All the amazing plants and wildlife we saw on our daily (and nightly) jungle treks. A sloth mama with her baby. All kinds of monkeys and birds (red and green macaws, oropendulas, blue-headed parrots, even a small toucan). Ants in all colours and sizes. An agouti and a bush rat. Big spiders, a small snake and the tiniest frogs. A cayman. Ancient parasite trees, Palo Santo, erotic roots, exotic flowers. / Ángel's telescope and binoculars. / My room with a 360° view. / Regular visits from a tame peccary lady. She enjoyed scratchies behind her ears like a dog and rubbed against our legs. / That full moon night at the lake, a background of jungle noises: howling, croaking, squeaking. Magical. / Chef Jeff's delicious food. / The crazy little kitten at the lodge. / I got along very well with Agathe and Teva. They're going to send me their photos from the trip! / Lessons on hyperindependence: "You know, when I offer you help you should really take it." / Enjoying the boat ride and the view over the rainforest with low-hanging clouds. / Reading a whole book in one go on the way back.

Laura class about the foundations of Human Design. I even booked a reading with her.

Raw vegan cheesecake at Café Kula. I've tried three different ones so far!

Meeting Winni, one of the owners of SolSeed. Such an inspiration. I would love to create a space like that.

Joining a laughing circle one evening. It was an absolutely ridiculous experience. Imitation, accents, animal noises, laughing at tough life events, declaring thumb wars, pure comedy. So glad I took a hit of that spliff before the event.

Another breathwork session with my girl Ari back in Pisac. Going to higher spheres during the retentions. I didn't draw the Past Lives card again but Breakthrough and Ripeness. Afterwards we talked for a long time. About our plans and experiences, Human Design, plant medicine, this and that. I can't wait to meet her again some day.

A Human Design reading with Laura.

Painting intuitively with watercolors and charcoal. Drawing tarot cards, weaving their meaning into the painting. Explaining the ideas to the others in a sharing circle. It felt so nice to just sit down and paint, have access to art supplies on the road.

My second experiment with plant medicine at Ayasana Wasi. It was a very intimate ceremony with Magnus and Lynn from the Netherlands and our hosts Pia and Luca. I felt a lot of sympathy and gratitude for everyone. Luca's sound bath was incredible and Pia basically brought me back to reality. After the ceremony, all four cats explored the maloca and Kali (my favourite) enjoyed cuddles and conversation. My experience is quite hard to integrate because I was shown pure bliss and it felt like I'd died and come back to my human form. What is even real anymore?

Another otherworldly massage with Raphael. Dhruva had already done an amazing job the week before but Raphael really put a lot of time and love into it. I felt cared for and caressed like a cat at some point.

Vida Vegan saved me on a nasty travel day by holding on to my backpacks for a few hours! It was lovely to meet Eric and Jacqueline for the last time and eat some delicious tomato soup. Their food always looks like straight out of a Michelin star restaurant. And I tried llullucha for the first time. Enya's Sail Away on the radio. Green apple soap.

Actually being able to sleep on the night bus after a grumpy evening. Arriving in Puno (still sleeping so the driver had to wake me up), the hotel allowed me to check in at 6am. Grateful.

A boat ride to Uros, the floating islands of Lake Titicaca. Meeting two cats / taking the cat boat.

Buying strawberries, blueberries, a clementine and a lúcuma at the market. An afternoon nap, dreaming of being in the Andes.

Looking at old photos. Realising how much beauty, love and abundance there is in my life. I can't wait to go home. Anticipation.

Frank Zappa's genius.

I treated myself to another Clear Minds Meditation Club hoodie and a longsleeve from Rip'n'Dip.

Taking an early bus to Copacabana. Biting into sour tutti frutti gummy tubes - the taste reminded me of BumBum ice cream. Finally feelt like updating Instagram. Instant feedback from my friends. Sitting on the right side: The view was gorgeous. Hills, wide open fields and Lake Titicaca in the background. So many animals. Mainly sheep, alpacas and cows, but I also saw a kitty and a pig family with lots of little piglets!

I fell down on my way to the hotel upon arriving in Bolivia and hurt my knees. But I moved into my gorgeous little bungalow (stained glass windows, domed ceiling, view over the lake), lit a fire, made cinnamon tea and a hot water bottle. Ate snacks in bed/ordered food and had a video call with Do. She even shared her Netflix password with me and prescribed watching Gilmore Girls. Slow travel. I might stay another night.

The view from the waterfront. Isla de la Luna against a snow-covered mountain pass. Little ducks with pastel blue beaks. The soothing sound of the water.

Stumbling upon a cute souvenir for Do. Treating myself to two pairs of earrings and a necklace. Helping the lady in the shop change the chain, having a lovely little conversation. Learning about ametrine/bolivianite, a mixture of amethyst and citrine. Two of my favourite crystals. Now I really want to get one. A cute souvenir for myself.

Egg and cheese sandwiches. Ordering too much passion fruit juice. Getting it to go in an empty water bottle. A cherry popsicle with gelatin.

A bright and inspired morning before leaving for La Paz. A shower (hot water!), snuggling up in bed, discovering a career coach I really resonate with. Feeling light, positive, happy. Grateful, aligned, realizing that I have all that I need and more. That I need to work on shifting my focus away from the perceived scarcity and see the abundance there is in my life.

The photo Do sent me of the knot she'd finally made into a cherry stem. Mit dir ist gut Kirschenessen.

On the bus to La Paz. Super pretty views. Even seeing nandus. Listening to a gratitude mantra (Jhené Aiko - 'alive & well'). Going on a deep dive into Human Design unconscious charts. I created a birth chart for my design date and according to that my unconsciousness presents as an Aquarius (with quite a bit of Aries mixed in). I resonate so much with that!

David Bowie - Modern Love

My room in La Paz had heating and two big windows overlooking this crazy city and the mountains. I could lie right by the window and bask in the morning sun. And they had real baguette at breakfast, not only that empty, airy bread they usually serve in South America.

Walking through the streets with Rem. Eating my first tumbo at the mercado. Learning about the famous prison at Plaza Sucre where you have to pay rent but can bring your whole family. Bolivian superstition and turbulent politics. Dehydrated potatoes. We walked into a church and they had the same painting of Bisexual Jesus as that store in Belize. And the Virgen de los Remedios wore a blue and magenta dress with silver glitter stars. Catholicism really hits different in the Americas.

Accidentally ending up in a vegan restaurant with a fancy tasting menu. They served me five courses for only 100 bolivianos. I would have never expected this! And right after lunch, I went to the art museum and I was such an amazing experience! Usually I'm a bit disappointed when it comes to art museums around here but this one was top notch. Inspired.

I had fun watching a Cholita wrestling show from the balcony. The smell of sweaty plastic clothing reminded me of children's carnival parties. Now that I think of it, that was a very smell-focused day in general. Chewing gum on the bus reminding me of my teenage years, going out at night. A whiff of someone's cooking strongly reminding me of my grandma's kitchen.

Browsing the stores at the Witches' Market. They had all kinds of amulets, spells, powders and potions, herbs and incense. My backpack is full of obscure objects now. I wonder if they'll let me through customs.

I treated myself to a beautiful ametrine and a piece of an agate geode.

Only ordering food that doesn't exist on the menu in an Indian restaurant. A delicious choice. The owner called me princesa and I kinda liked it.

Warm Bounty porridge: coconut milk, dark chocolate, too much sugar.

Spending my last day in La Paz riding the teleférico up to El Alto. Amazing view of the mountains and the cemetery. Trying to find one of the famous Cholets I ran into a big parade for La Paz Day! I saw a store for Cholita skirts, browsed cheap cosmetics stores and enjoyed a bottle of cold sparkling water (I'd been searching for that for hours).

Ice-cream testing: the winner is clearly the sour fruit popsicle. Second place: a scoop of creamy cherimoya at the train station. Loser: Canela shaved ice. Tasted like the coating of Big Red chewing gum with a ton of sugar. Inedible.

I LOVED our tour through the Uyuni salt desert. It must have been one of the most fascinating and diverse places I've ever seen: crunchy white infinity / fun photos: "I'm a snack!" and asanas on an elephant trunk / finding the Bavarian flag at the salt hostel and a big Rallye Dakar sign / my lovely company - Bismarck, Leo and the girl gang: Hannah, Satoko, Tas and Verity / all the animals I saw: foxes, vicuñas, viscachas, flamingos - even a cat at Cactus Island / red wine and snacks at sunset / laughing so much together, comparing MILFs and cougars, listening to Babymetal on the road / the breathtaking vistas of the desert valleys, huge rocks, marvellous lagoons, volcanoes / a lava field that looked like the surface of Mars / bulbous green coral (?) formations / Burning Man vibes at the train cemetery, the Road to Nowhere (well, actually train tracks to Chile) / geysers and a hot spring that saved my toes from freezing off //

Stargazing in the Atacama desert. I've never had such a clear view of the Milky Way before. And for the first time, I saw Saturn through the telescope - the rings were clearly visible! There were tons of shooting stars coming down. Magical.

A cute little tienda with handicrafts made by local female artists. A lovely denim jacket and a very fluffy and adorable dog. Big boi. I cuddled and played with so many dogs in San Pedro. Highly unusual for me. Pretty ceramics and jewellery stores. Inspiration everywhere.

Witnessing an encounter of two cowboys on their horses on a street corner.

Touching a big meteorite a the Museo del Meteorito. Making a wish.

The thinnest possible crescent moon with a circular Earth shadow.

Going on a bike tour to Garganta del Diablo with Hannah. We even had to cross a river so we took off our boots and pushed the biked through the water. Quite an adventure. The walk through the canyon was longer than expected and in the end a steep mountain waited for me. I'm kinda proud of myself for turning around halfway, taking into account my bad knees and difficulties climbing down. Riding back during Golden Hour was lovely - the harsh shadows of the rock formations along the river and the desert trees made the landscape look like an African savanna in a way. We rewarded ourselves with a big batch of ice-cream.

Visiting my 40th country - Chile. Getting out of the Bolivian border scam with a firm no. Entering a different world. It's fascinating how a virtual line on a map can create such opposite realities. Chile is such a rich, western country and a striking contrast to Bolivia in many ways.

Listening to my emotions. Booking a flight home. I feel so much better already. I let all my friends know that I'm coming home and we're making plans for the summer. I need to soak up some love and sunshine. It was tough beating the fear of missing out on an opportunity to see the Galapagos islands or go diving in the Caribbean. But I'll see it as something to look forward to - now I wouldn't really be able to enjoy it anyway.

Many cats on my street in Santiago. A cat cafe just around the corner! They even offer yoga classes. My very cosy bed. Hard to leave. Entering a big Chilean supermarket. Feels like home already.

Discovering waacking, a dance style with dramatic arm movements.

Retail therapy. I bought so many pretty little things in Santiago and I love them all! Especially the lipgloss from the kids department with a glitter star snow globe on top.

The taxi driver with two Freddy Mercury figurines on his dashboard who played Living on my Own for me on the way to the airport.

Jodie Foster's space travel experience in Contact made me cry.

Being back. Hanging out with Manu, goofing around. Cuddling, making food for each other, getting way too comfortable around each other. It's so nice not to be alone for a change.

A lemon ice cream flavoured smoothie. Butterbreze and Yogurette (lemon buttermilk!).

Survival of the Thickest - what a stylish, empowering show. FUN.

An amazingly empathetic Thai massage from Ploy. I'll be back.

An ice cream walk with Raphael. Meeting Do for the first time in months. It was really good to see her!

I ordered the "kiddie party" ice cream and wasn't disappointed: two lollipops, gummy candy and rainbow sprinkles.

Being able to move back to my apartment earlier than planned. Doris helped me so much with the move! We had breakfast together at IKEA and ice-cream in LA. She defended me against my brother. Talked some sense into me. I'm very grateful! After I returned the car, Manu ordered my favourite pizza for me and let me sleep on his sofa one more time so I wouldn't have to go back to my absolutely chaotic flat.

Café Mozart, fancy drinks and the Barbie movie with the Friendzone.

[evolve94]

The first 20 hours -- how to learn anything | Josh Kaufman | TEDxCSU

Transcriber: Gustavo Rocha Reviewer: Marssi Draw Hi everyone. Two year ago, my life changed forever. My wife Kelsey and I welcomed our daughter Lela into the world. Now, becoming a parent is an amazing experience. Your whole world changes over night. And all of your priorities change immediately. So fast that it makes it really difficult to process sometimes.Now, you also have to learn a tremendous amount about being a parent like, for example, how to dress your child. (Laughter) This was new to me. This is an actual outfit,  I thought this was a good idea. And even Lela knows that it's not a good idea. (Laughter) So there is so much to learn and so much craziness all at once.And to add to the craziness,  Kelsey and I both work from home, we're entrepreneurs, we run our own businesses. So, Kelsey develops courses online for yoga teachers. I'm an author. And so, I'm working from home, Kelsey's working from home. We have an infant and we're trying to make sure that everything gets done that needs done.And life is really, really busy. And a couple of weeks into this amazing experience, when the sleep deprivation really kicked in, like around week eight, I had this thought, and it was the same thought that parents across the ages, internationally, everybody has had this thought, which is: I am never going to have free time ever again.(Laughter) Somebody said it's true. It's not exactly true, but it feels really, really true in that moment. And this was really disconcerning to me, because one of the things that I enjoy more than anything else is learning new things. Getting curious about something and diving in and fiddling around and  learning through trial and error.And eventually becoming pretty good at something. And without this free time, I didn't know how I was ever  going to do that ever again. And so, I'm a big geek, I want to keep learning things, I want to keep growing. And so what I've decided to do was, go to the library, and go to the bookstore, and look at what research says about how we learn and how we learn quickly.And I read a bunch of books, I read a bunch of websites. And tried to answer this question, how long does it take to acquire a new skill? You know what I found? 10,000 hours! Anybody ever heard this? It takes 10,000 hours. If you want to learn something new, if you want to be good at it, it's going to take 10,000 hours to get there.And I read this in book after book, in website after website. And my mental experience of reading all of this stuff was like: No!! I don't have time! I don't have 10,000 hours. I am never going to be able to learn anything new. Ever again. (Laughter) But that's not true. So, 10,000 hours, just to give you a rough order of magnitude, 10,000 hours is a full-time job for five years.That's a long time. And we've all had the experience of learning something new, and it didn't take us anywhere close to that amount of time, right? So, what's up? There's something kinda funky going on here. What the research says and what we expect, and have experiences, they don't match up.And what I found, here's the wrinkle: The 10,000 hour rule came out of studies of expert-level performance. There's a professor at Florida State University, his name is K. Anders Ericsson. He is the originator of the 10,00 hour rule. And where that came from is, he studied professional athletes, world class musicians, chess grand masters.All of this ultra competitive folks in ultra-high performing fields. And he tried to figure out how long does it take to get to the top of those kinds of fields. And what he found is, the more deliberate practice, the more time that those individuals spend practicing the elements of whatever it is that they do, the more time you spend, the better you get.And the folks at the tippy top of their fields put in around 10,000 hours of practice. Now, we were talking about the game of telephone a little bit earlier. Here's what happened: an author by the name of Malcolm Gladwell wrote a book in 2007 called "Outliers: The Story of Success", and the central piece of that book was the 10,000 hour rule.Practice a lot, practice well, and you will do extremely well, you will reach the top of your field. So, the message, what Dr. Ericsson was actually saying is, it takes 10,000 hours to get at the top of an ultra competitive field in a very narrow subject, that's what that means. But here's what happened: ever since Outliers came out, immediately came out, reached the top of best seller lists, stayed there for three solid months.All of a sudden the 10,000 hour rule was everywhere. And a society-wide game of telephone started to be played. So this message, it takes 10,000 hours to reach the top of an ultra competitive field, became, it takes 10,000 hours to become an expert at something, which became, it takes 10,000 hours to become good at something, which became, it takes 10,000 hours to learn something.But that last statement, it takes 10,000 hours to learn something, is not true. It's not true. So, what the research actually says -- I spent a lot of time here at the CSU library in the cognitive psychology stacks 'cause I'm a geek. And when you actually look at the studies of skill acquisition, you see over and over a graph like this.Now, researchers, whether they're studying a motor skill, something you do physically or a mental skill, they like to study things that they can time. 'Cause you can quantify that, right? So, they'll give research participants a little task, something that requires physical arrangement, or something that requires learning a little mental trick, and they'll time how long a participant takes to complete the skill.And here's what this graph says, when you start -- so when researchers gave participants a task, it took them a really long time, 'cause it was new and they were horrible. With a little bit of practice, they get better and better and better. And that early part of practice is really, really efficient.People get good at things with just a little bit of practice. Now, what's interesting to note is that, for skills that we want to learn for ourselves, we don't care so much about time, right? We just care about how good we are, whatever good happens to mean. So if we relabel performance time to how good you are, the graph flips, and you get his famous and widely known, this is the learning curve.And the story of the learning curve is when you start, you're grossly incompetent and you know it, right? (Laughter) With a little bit of practice, you get really good, really quick. So that early level of improvement is really fast. And then at a certain point you reach a plateau, and the subsequent games become much harder to get, they take more time to get.Now, my question is, I want that, right? How long does it take from starting something and being grossly incompetent and knowing it to being reasonably good? In hopefully, as short a period of time as possible. So, how long does that take? Here's what my research says: 20 hours. That's it. You can go from knowing nothing about any skill that you can think of. Want to learn a language? Want to learn how to draw? Want to learn how to juggle flaming chainsaws? (Laughter) If you put 20 hours of focused deliberate practice into that thing, you will be astounded. Astounded at how good you are. 20 hours is doable, that's about 45 minutes a day for about a month.Even skipping a couple days, here and there. 20 hours isn't that hard to accumulate. Now, there's a method to doing this. Because it's not like you can just start fiddling around for about 20 hours and expect these massive improvements. There's a way to practice intelligently. There's a way to practice efficiently, that will make sure that you invest those 20 hours in the most effective way that you possibly can.And here's the method, it applies to anything: The first is to deconstruct the skill. Decide exactly what you want to be able to do when you're done, and then look into the skill and break it down into smaller pieces. Most of the things that we think of as skills are actually big bundles of skills that require all sorts of different things.The more you can break apart the skill, the more you're able to decide, what are the parts of this skill that would actually help me get to what I want? And then you can practice those first. And if you practice the most important things first, you'll be able to improve your performance in the least amount of time possible.The second is, learn enough to self correct. So, get three to five resources about what it is you're trying to learn. Could be book, could be DVDs, could be courses, could be anything. But don't use those as a way to procrastinate on practice. I know I do this, right? Get like 20 books about the topic, like, "I'm going to start learning how to program a computer when I complete these 20 books".No. That's procrastination. What you want to do is learn just enough that you can actually practice and self correct or self edit as you practice. So the learning becomes a way of getting better at noticing when you're making a mistake and then doing something a little different. The third is to remove barriers to practice.Distractions, television, internet. All of these things that get in the way of you actually sitting down and doing the work. And the more you're able to use just a little bit of willpower to remove the distractions that are keeping you from practicing, the more likely you are to actually sit down and practice, right? And the fourth is to practice for at least 20 hours.Now, most skills have what I call a frustration barrier. You know, the grossly-incompetent- and-knowing-it part? That's really, really frustrating. We don't like to feel stupid. And feeling stupid is a barrier to us  actually sitting down and doing the work. So, by pre-committing to practicing whatever it is that you want to do for at least 20 hours, you will be able to overcome that initial frustration barrier and stick with the practice long enough to actually reap the rewards.That's it! It's not rocket science. Four very simple steps that you can use to learn anything. Now, this is easy to talk about in theory, but it's more fun to talk about in practice. So one of the things that I've wanted to learn how to do for a long time is play the ukulele. Has anybody seen Jake Shimabukuro's TEDTalk where he plays the ukulele and makes it sound like -- he's like a ukulele god.It's amazing. I saw it, I was like, "That is so cool!" It's such a neat instrument. I would really like to learn how to play. And so I decided that to test this theory I wanted to put 20 hours into practicing ukulele and see where it got. And so the first thing about playing the ukulele is, in order to practice, you have to have one, right? So, I got an ukulele and -- My lovely assistant? (Laughter) Thank you sir. I think I need the chord here.It's not just an ukulele, it's an electric ukulele. (Laughter) Yeah. So, the first couple hours are just like the first couple hours of anything. You have to get the tools that you are using to practice. You have to make sure they're available. My ukulele didn't come with strings attached.I had to figure out how to put those on. Like, that's kind of important, right? And learning how to tune, learning how to make sure that all of the things that need to be done in order to start practicing get done, right? Now, one of the things when I was ready to actually start practicing was I looked in online databases and songbooks for how to play songs.And they say, okay, ukuleles, you can play more than one string at a time, so you can play chords, that's cool, you are accompanying yourself, yay you. (Laughter) And when I started looking at songs, I had an ukulele chord book that had like hundreds of chords. Looking at this and "Wow, that's intimidating".But when you look at the actual songs, you see the same chords over and over, right? As it turns out, playing the ukulele is kind of like doing anything, There's a very small set of things that are really important and techniques that you'll use all the time. And in most songs you'll use four, maybe five chords, and that's it, that's the song.You don't have to know hundreds, as long as you know the four or the five. So, while I was doing my research, I found a wonderful little medley of pop songs by a band called Axis of Awesome. (Whistles) -- Somebody knows it. -- And what Axis of Awesome says is that you can learn, or you can play pretty much any pop song of the past five decades, if you know four chords, and those chords are G, D, Em and C.Four chords pump out every pop song ever, right? So I thought, this is cool! I would like to play every pop song ever. (Laughter) So, that was the first song I decided to learn, and I would like to actually share it with you. Ready? (Applause) Alright. (Music) (Singing) Just a small town girl, living in a lonely world, she took the midnight train going anywhere.I heard that you settled down, (Laughter) that you found a girl, that you're married now. Every night in my dreams (Laughter) I see you, I feel you, that is how I know you go on. (Laughter) I won't hesitate no more, no more. It cannot wait, I'm yours. 'Cause you were amazing, we did amazing things.If I could, then I would, I'd go wherever you will -- Can you feel the love tonight. (Laughter) I can't live with or without you. When I find myself -- When I find myself in times of trouble, mother Mary comes to me, Sometimes I feel like I don't have partner. No woman, no cry. Yeah mama, this surely is a dream.I come from a land down under. (Laughter) Once a jolly swagman camped by a billabong. Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, (Laughter) but here's my number, so call me Hey sexy lady, op, op, op, op, oppan gangnam style. (Laughter) It's time to say goodbye. Closing time, every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end.(Singing and music ends) (Applause) Thank you, thank you. I love that song. (Laughter) And I have a secret to share with you. So, by playing that song for you, I just hit my twentieth hour of practicing the ukulele. (Applause) Thank you. And so it's amazing, pretty much anything that you can think of, what do you want to do.The major barrier to learn something new is not intellectual, it's not the process of you learning a bunch of little tips or tricks or things. The major barrier's emotional. We're scared. Feeling stupid doesn't feel good, in the beginning of learning anything new you feel really stupid. So the major barrier's not intellectual, it's emotional.But put 20 hours into anything. It doesn't matter. What do you want to learn? Do you want to learn a language? Want to learn how to cook? Want to learn how to draw? What turns you on? What lights you up? Go out and do that thing. It only takes 20 hours. Have fun. (Applause)