#i was just talking to my aunt a while back and we talked abt that

[necro-hamster]

thinking abt how that post i see now n again thats like "lgbt tiktok teens would not survive in the 80s and 90s when we called each other fags and dykes lovingly <3" and the op is like. 21. like dude shut upppp

[teruthecreator]

trying so hard to be normal but i really don’t think i could survive going to the psych ward and i’m rlly like. bothered my siblings are pushing it so hard

[deathofacupid]

family | tom holland

a/n: erm idk how i feel abt this one there's like no active plot- wrote this a while back um i might take it down

summary: for the first time, tom meets your family.

warnings: cursing, mentions of sex, indian aunties

pairing: indian!fem!reader x tom holland

word count: 2.2k+ words

you shuffled through some more of your makeup, touching up your hair at the same time. diwali was held annually at your parents' home, where many relatives would take time off to see each other. during diwali, people would wear their finest clothes, illuminate the interior and exterior of their homes with saaki (earthen lamp), diyas (candles) and rangoli, perform worship ceremonies of Lakshmi, the goddess of prosperity and wealth, light fireworks, and partake in family feasts, where mithai (sweets) and gifts are shared.

it was also the first time that tom would be attending with you, which may have been the reason you were nervous. every since a young age, your parents had kind of expected you to marry someone of your own nationality.

after all, your two sisters did that, as well as your brother. your parents had met tom a couple times, but seeing as he was busy filming, they hadn't gotten to know him that well, despite the fact it was almost a year that the two of you were together.

you stepped out of the bathroom, picking up your dress slightly to keep you from tripping. pulling open a draw in the cabinet, you picked up a nice kurta set for tom, one that you'd gotten him last week. it was a pretty navy blue, one you knew would complement his warm eyes.

"oh, hey, love, you all ready?"

you couldn't help but nod shyly, most of your attire consisted of sweatpants, so him seeing you dressed up made you blush a little.

"you look really pretty, y/n," he kissed your cheek. "i love the traditional look on you."

"thanks, tommy. now go put this on, i don't wanna be late. can't make a bad impression, now can we?"

he rolled his eyes playfully and took the items from you, before changing. in front of you, making you blush a bright red.

"what, darling? we literally have sex all the time," tom snickered.

"yes, yes, i-i know. shut up and hurry," you said, getting over your embarrassment and shamelessly checking him out. 

"you're not very subtle."

"i don't need to be. we're dating, 'member? you're my boyfrienddd. and we have 'sex all the time,'" you mimicked. not giving him time to respond, you walked over to him, making sure it fit right. "this isn't tight or anything?"

damn, was he hot in that.

"nope. snug as a bug in a rug," and you couldn't help but snort at his childishness and the silly rhyme.

"cool, now say 'croissant.'"

"ouch, babe. so mean."

"mhm," you kissed him, and he caught you off guard, his tongue slipping in your mouth. it got slightly heated before you pushed him away, remembering you had things to do.

"woah, there, keep your dick in your pants just a little while longer."

"nooooooo," tom drawled, groaning teasingly.

"i didn't take all this time getting ready for you to wreck it in five minutes. you wouldn't believe how difficult it was to get this dress on."

"i bet it'll be easier to take off," he wiggled his brows suggestively.

"you can test that out once we get back home."

he helped you downstairs and to the car, as you terribly struggled to walk in the heels. after sitting you in the car, he got in himself.

"okay, tommy, when we get there," you spoke as he turned on the engine, "don't drink, they'll ask you if you want vodka and you refuse, cause it's a trick, got that? and, um... stay away from my aunts, well, actually, greet them, but not too much. because if you start talking with them, they'll make you spill things you wouldn't have said otherwise, it's kinda manipulative, but... in a good way. ooh! be funny, but not too funny, because then they'll think you're too funny, and we don't want that. and don't curse too much, they don't like that. but don't be uptight, y'know?"

"wow, okay, first off, angel, breathe. why are you stressing out so much? it's just your family, right? i've met them before."

"this is different, though. because it's diwali. and before it was just casual, and it wasn't for long. plus, that was just my parents. this is everyone. why aren't you panicking? you went crazy the first time you were about to meet them."

"'cuz if i panic while you're panicking, we'll be a huge panicky mess. only one of us can panic at a time. that's the rule."

you laughed.

"besides, they'll love me," he started as he looked over to you at the red light, "i know you do," tom murmured, leaning in.

"the light's green."

"aw, come on, y/n, you totally ruined the moment!"

"it would have been ruined anyways, angry drivers honking at us isn't exactly romantic, babes."

"yeah, yeah."

soon enough, with some giggling and talking, time went by and you reached. getting out of the car, you straightened up and smoothed your hair. "tommy?" you asked, glanced at him as you stood in front of the front door.

"yes, my love?"

"my family, they, um, they can be a lot, okay? they want what's best for me, they just don't know that it's you," he took your hands in his and opened his mouth to say something, but you interrupted him. "promise me something," you murmured.

"yeah?"

"they aren't going to break us apart. because i love you so, so, so, so, so much, and you mean the world to me."

"well, darling, you are my world, and i solemnly swear," he put one of your hands on his heart playfully, "that they won't break us apart. nothing will. and i love you, too," he leaned in to kiss you, but you heard laughing and shrieking inside as the door opened. it was your niece, raja, or your sister priya's son. he was 8 and the most chaotic gremlin you knew, aside from tom.

"ewwwwwwwwww! they were kissing!"

we weren't kissing, but we would have gotten around to it if you hadn't interrupted, butthole.

tom leaned down to greet the kid, ruffled his hair slightly. "hi, raja, i'm peter," he said, changing his accent. you were slightly surprised that he remembered, last night you'd showed him pictures of your entire family, explaining who was who (you had a big family).

"spider-man!"

"shhhhh, you can't tell anyone! or the bad guys will get us!" raja giggled, and you gently moved him to the side, kissing the little boy's hair. it was the sweetest thing ever, seeing tom interact with the kid that way, and it made your love and admiration for him grow.

"amma! we're here!" your mom and dad greeted you by the door, and you bent down to touch your mother's feet, before realizing that you didn't share this detail with tom. but as you looked over, he was doing the same, and you wondered how he'd known. you did the same to do your father and he did the same to your mother.

your mom looked over to your dad, clearly impressed.

"hi, beta. andar aa jaa. sab aa gae, tum-he aakhiree ho. (come inside. everyone is here, you are the last.)" she gave you a kiss on the side of your head and you moved over to hug your dad as well. "hi, tom," she smiled.

"h-hello," he stammered as your mother gave him a hug, and visibly, he was surprised. you held in a snicker. tom moved over to shake your dad's hand, and the older man inspected him before giving a curt nod and smile.

you took his hand and squeezed it gently, kissing him on his cheek to calm him down slightly.

"there you are," your sister beamed, "didn't know if you and your hotshot boyfriend would show."

you rolled your eyes and gave her a hug. "love you, too," pausing momentarily, "tom this is d-"

"dia," he smiled, "it's nice to meet you. i've heard a lot." dia was your younger sister, age 23, she'd found the one last year and gotten married to him just 8 months later.

"all good things, i hope?"

"mostly," you chimed in.

a man appeared next to dia and you hugged him briefly, too. (there was a lotta hugging.)

"hey, tom, i'm prakash. nice to finally meet you. big fan, by the way."

you felt a need to interrupt, "me too. he's my celebrity crush."

tom rolled his eyes playfully, adding, "i better be. and it's nice to meet you, too, mate."

the four of you sat down on the couch, joining everyone else.

"priya," your older sister introduced, grinning. "raja's mom. and this is aditeya, my husband." adi leaned over to shake his hand and tom greeted him verbally as well.

"siddhant, my younger brother, but everyone calls him sid." not to mention, very overprotective. (and your favorite sibling.)

sid gave him a once-over and reluctantly reached over for a handshake. "hey, thomas," he nodded, unamused.

"relax," you mouthed, "he's just protective."

you went on to introduce him to all your aunts and uncles, and then finally, have some snacks.

"we adjusted the spice level," priya said.

"and there's milk," you added.

"nah, don't worry, i love spicy food," he waved his hand nonchalantly.

you resisted the urge to roll your eyes, considering that he couldn't eat any indian food you made, you always had to lessen the spices for him, but it made a funny first date, for you, at least.

he took a bite of the samosa andhis eyes widened as he swallowed it down. 16 pairs of eyes  looked at him expectantly, waiting for a reaction."

"i-it's very good," he choked out.

"babes, you want milk?" you asked, knowing very well that he did.

tom forced a smile, "no, no, i'm good."

"okay..." you drawled. "enjoy then!" then you took a bite and beamed.

"i'm thirsty," you declared, to anyone willing to listen. then you stood up and strode into the kitchen, grabbing the milk from the fridge.

"you like him?"

you yelped and whipped around, seeing that it was just sid.

"shit, bro, you scared me! what the hell?"

"tom. you like him?"

"well, duh, why else would i be dating him?"

"how serious are you?"

"what is this? 20 questions?"

"just answer," he insisted.

"siddie, you don't need to worry," you said, knowing the childhood nickname would soften him up.

"i know, but-"

"no, look, trust me, he's... i think he's the one. he's been there for me like no one has. tom's so different, and not just a brainless actor. i know he'll keep me happy, and i also know that to him, i come before acting. he's made that a priority and showed that to me."

"i- okay. i trust you. and i'm happy for you," he leaned on for a hug, and once you broke apart, you poured the milk into the cup.

"who's that for?" sid asked. "you? did you think it was spicy?"

"no," you snorted, "it's for tom. he just won't admit he needs it." you walked walked out of the kitchen and back into the living room, taking back your seat. you set the milk in front of you, taking a sip first.

the second you put it down, he grabbed it and chugged the glass, resulting in some stares and odd looks casted toward him.

"i- uh, i really, really love milk," he blushed.

"definitely breastfed," your mom said.

"is he really the one if he can't even handle the samosa?" one of your aunts chimed in.

someone got to it before you did, another aunt, "shut it, rashmi. always talking."

"oi, chup, (shush.) i'm looking out for the girl."

"how about you look out for yourself? oh, wait, you already did. and see how that went with akash?"

they went back and forth bickering, but you smiled, considering this as a win. who cared about what they thought? their judgement? yes, they were a lot and they were your family, but tom was, too.

you loved your overbearing family, and you loved tom.

[bones-of-a-rabbit]

status of babbit's life yeehaw

tl,dr: busy moving and a couple of other big life things that just complicate things, but well on the way to being back to normal! new fic chapters and better quality art coming soon.

tl,wr (too long, will read):

Helloooo what's up its me, Babbit. or Rabbit. or Bones. or Idiot Moron Menace Child, idk im not picky lol

i know a lot of you guys have been wondering wtf is up with my upload schedule lately and the extreme lack of even basic content and also i am extremely aware that i have not updated my fics in a few millennia and for that i am very, very sorry. this post is to answer a few questions you might have, if anyone was curious about the 'reason' instead of just the 'when.'

my family and i have had a hell of a year, y'all. like, jesus christ, i really hope things level out and calm down for a while once we're moved in to our new apartment bc god damn we are so tired. the list goes: 1. we got kicked out of the house we were renting-to-own bc we wouldn't be able to afford the new rate, so they gave us two months to find a new place to live (not long enough, it turns out) and then foreclosed to get us out. 75% of our belongings were still in the house when we had to leave. that includes all of our christmas ornaments- including the ones kept for decades, and the ones made by me and my siblings, and the fancy ones made from blown glass. 2. the first night out of the house, one of our dogs, freaked out by the strangeness of the situation, panicked and slipped her harness and ran off. that was over a year ago. we haven't seen her since. 3. my cat got very ill and became unable to eat. she passed away almost exactly a year ago. she had been 14-15, and had been my baby since i was maybe 8. 4. one of the tires on my dads car blew out. during the night, while it was parked on the curb so he could put the spare on in the morning, one of the in-tact tires was fucking stolen LMAO 5. we applied to rent at so many places and got rejected so, so many times. it costs money to apply, btw. we're talking like $200+. no, u don't get that money back. 6. i lost my job bc knowing i would have to work 8 hours at a job that stresses me out to the point of exhaustion (at a place where no one takes me seriously and would actively laugh at me when i try to express my need to step away for a minute) sometimes paralyzed me and made me sick to my stomach and made me feel unable to leave the house, and i called out one too many times. a day after my birthday, too! 7. just recently, like within the last week, my dad's car got fuckin totalled!!!!!

THE GOOD NEWS IS WE OFFICIALLY, FINALLY, AFTER A SOLID YEAR, HAVE AN APARTMENT!!!!! I'LL HAVE MY OWN ROOM AGAIN!!! THERE'S AN ENTIRE KITCHEN!!!!!!!

the 'oh god' news is we still have to move in, and replace a lot of the stuff that we just couldn't take with us when we moved out (mostly stuff like bookshelves, dining table, dressers, etc) AND get the few things we could cram into a storage center out and moved into the new place, which isn't a lot but at the same time is more than we can realistically handle on our own. and then, we have to get my mums cats (a pair of kitty sisters that we had to temporarily house with my aunt, who got tired of looking after them and let them outside to be outdoor cats a few months ago. yes, this was an extremely shitty thing to do, and we've been working hard to get them back safely) AND my gecko (who my cousin has been looking after, even tho feeding him worms freaks him out LMAO yes i plan on compensating him) moved in, as well... basically oh my god there is so much to worry about but at the same time it's nice to have to worry about it bc it means we're making progress sdkfhsjdkfhdsjfh

basically i am just so tired but so busy and also thinkin abt so much im so sorry for lack of stuff but i am so looking forward to being able to bounce back, pls stick with me, it'll be sorted out soon i think and then i'll hit y'all with some good stuff i promise!!!!!!!

anyway thank u guys i love u and appreciate u all for sticking around

[pupkashi]

More latino Gojo please!!

omg I’m so happy you guys are liking these so far hehe 🤭 here’s a couple headcanons just off the top of my head !! scenes w reader are very slightly hispanic!reader coded ,, let me know if u guys want more :3

he’s obsessed with hispanic candy ,, goes to mexican / Hispanic stores solely for their candy aisles and stocks up with insane amounts of them (always gets the students some too :3)

the first time he meets your parents is at a carne asada and every mom and aunt is absolutely fawning over him telling you how handsome and how tall he is

he’s an absolute charmer, giving them all sweet smiles and saying hello and making conversation with the little spanish he’s learned so far

all the dads and uncles are sooo apprehensive of him bc who is this guy ??? thinking he’s all that acting all cool ??? and then they talk to him and he’s talking to them abt soccer and he’s making them all laugh and is immediately accepted 😭

can dance literally ANY style it makes you insanely jealous . one time you guys went to a cousins 15 and they started playing salsa and he was dragging u on the dance floor, then they switched it to bachata and he was immediately pulling you into his chest, THEN they switched it up again to Cumbia and he was all smiles

everyone was just like :0 because ???? are we sure are we absolutely sure he isn’t latino

he’ll call you ‘mi sol’ ‘mi amor’ ‘cariño’ when it’s just the two of you

picks up Spanish very easily actually !! sounds like a native speaker the first time he tried saying something to you in Spanish

he was learning it behind your back to surprise you, but he once answered a question you asked in Spanish and he was caught

“¿que no sabes cuanto te quiero?” you mumbles, kissing his nose, “i love you more” he sighs out, his body tensing when he realizes he’s just exposed himself

“since when do you know Spanish?” you smile, a shocked expression on your face, “been practicing for a while now, wanted to surprise you” his face is red and his ears burning, but he’s peppering your face with kisses

“but now i can ditch that murderous owl and have you teach me instead” he grins, tackling you onto the floor when you shake your head ‘no’ teasingly

[ferg0s]

hii i literally would die for your fics, thankyou for feeding my knb thirst thoughts😩❤️‍🩹 i was wondering if you could write a threesome with kiyoshi and hyuuga, or honestly any pair when yn accidentally goes to the male sauna, and the pair is there. then she started playing w herself and the pair was abt to call her out when she called their names, and then just boom filthy smut phew. it's totally fine if you don't have the time though!! i'm literally dying over the symbiosis series with daiki though i love you😭♥️

Sauna / Hot Spring Smut is my speciality now. I’m copyrighting it. Also Kiyoshi and Hyuuga… together…. 🫣

]|I{•----» | 18 + CONTENT | »----•{I|]

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT

(unedited)

Rico had unorthodox ways of training the team, some more questionable than others - pushing seniors around in a wheelchair across the park wearing T-Shirts for her fathers Gym was not only a good exercise but also free advertisement - and some that seemed to have logical explanations.

Saunas. A cocktail of health benefits made into a room with a blazing temperature. The stress releasing, muscle relaxing, skin rejuvenating experience that the team needed after their practice. A boost in morale too. You had noticed that the team seemed less enthusiastic about running a kilometre, going over the basics. You know that if they dreaded coming to practice they weren’t giving it their all - meaning little to no improvement. After a brief talk to Rico about their demeanour, Rico immediately called a team meeting and announced that they were taking a trip to the sauna. That night.

Which to them was great - who wouldn’t wand to relax after such an intense practice - but for you it ruined your entire evening plans. “Umm, tonight?” You asked, a little confused. “Yeah, I’ll get a reservation and everything. The sooner we get rid of this problem the sooner we can train properly,” she said with glee, probably mentally patting her back for being such a good coach. Which yes, she was, but at the moment she was also a major cockblock. Her coaching was getting in the way of your elegant evening out - the term ‘elegant’ used very loosely because nothing about going over to a guys house to get railed was elegant - and you had clear boundaries of your work, if you can call being a manager for the team work, and personal life. But not for Rico, who’s work was her personal life.

You told your current boy toy that you couldn’t make it, making some excuse about your great aunt being in the hospital for shingles, as you listened to Kagami tell stories about America on the train to the sauna. He bought the excuse, rescheduling for your ‘movie night’ to next week, and sulking about how he’d have to see the greatest movie of all time (morbius) without you. To say your mood was down the entire ride to the sauna was an understatement. You were missing out on some quality time to sit in a hot room for an hour. Not how you were expecting to be breaking a sweat on a Friday night.

You were the least excited one there. A frown present on your face the entire time, the type of frown that can turn anyone to stone. You were mad at Rico, pissed to be honest, for dragging you along - but for the team to get a discount they needed the coach and co-coach to be present, or else it would just count as a normal trip not a trip half funded by the school - which made it even worse considering there was a logical reason for you to be there.

You’d think having two towel-chad girls sitting infront of you would be every boys dream - but not when one of the girls were your coach, and the other was glaring at you with a clear intention to kill. The boys stayed on one side, while you and Rico stayed on one. The hot steam of the Sauna seemed to fuel your anger rather than defuse it. The tension was thick, suffocating almost. The cockblock plus the owner saying he won’t let them use the Woman’s Sauna if there was only two of you that wanted to use them, Rico had paid money for the woman’s one to be rented, and forcing you to be with the boys. You were too busy being mad at Rico to notice the ogling happening on the other side of the Sauna. It didn’t help that’s the towels were made of the thinnest material known to man. You held your arms crossed over your chest, shielding your exposed nipples - adding to the menacing Aura radiating off you. The light banter happening among eveyeone drowned out with thoughts of what could’ve happened if you had went - dark room with nothing but the dim glow of the TV, together under a blanket, feeling his hand go up…

You took a deep breath and snapped back to reality. And your reality was that you were in a sauna with a bunch of men - a bunch of attractive, 80% naked men with the physique of a  Michelangelo sculpture. You turned your gaze towards the other side of the sauna, stomach flipping at the sight infront of you. Men. Good looking men. Legs open, arms sprawled out behind them, head titled back. If you weren’t so worked up from before you would’ve snapped out of your haze and realized the men you were ogling over treated you like their sister, saw you as their sister - not even step sister so anything of that nature was out of the question. Too worked up on Estrogen, progesterone, and testosterone, you crossed your legs tighter and took in a deep breath. Your staring went unnoticed for a while - most of the guys were avoiding looking at the two of you while the other were too busy enjoying the sauna to notice - until your eyes drifted across the line of boys and locked sight with Kiyoshis.

Kiyoshi Teppie.

The guy who’d always have just enough bento for you and him to enjoy lunch together, who always made sure you didn’t leave the gym alone at night and waited with you until your bus came - who would stare for an extra second when you bent over, who’d always eye you down when you walked in the gym, who’d always make sure to get in positions to be pressed up against your back when you were putting equipment away. The sexual tension between you two was thick - and with the state of mind you were in you imagined all the other parts of him that were thick.

Your felt your heart beating faster as Kiyoshis eyes drifted down your body, slow, as if he was trying to memorize every inch of your exposed skin. You felt the tips of your ears grow hot at the feeling, the tingly feeling inching down your skin, following the trial of his eyes. After returning his attention back to your eyes, Kiyoshi - who was hunched over with his forearms on his legs - sat up straight and let out a groan - nothing uncommon given the location - and sprawled his arms out on the ledge behind him, opening his legs. Your eyes briefly flickered down to his body, notching the bulge present underneath the towel. You bit the inside of your cheek, looking back up at him with a shy smile, him responding with a smirk. You knew the game he was playing - and you hated losing games.

Uncrossing your arms you also put them on the ledge behind you, letting out a loud sigh as you did so. You could feel your hard nipples against the towel, knowing they’d be visible, and the way Kiyoshi took a deep breath confirmed just that. You bit your lip to hide your smile, letting out a scoff when Kiyoshi finally looked at you. He looked away, sucking on his teeth, tossing a glance back at your chest before taking in a deep breath.

“-I think I’m gonna have a heat stroke,” Furihata said out loud. “It’s not that bad-“ Izuki chimes up. “It’s spring too. It’s hot already and we’re in a sauna,” Furihata groaned. “They sell ice cream near the front counter -“ Tsuchida said. “I’m leaving. I’m gonna melt in here,” Furihata announced as he sprung up. “Yeah, me too,” Tsuchida added.

You heard the conversation happening, but you were too busy with Kiyoshi to notice. Now sitting with your legs open, towel hiked up your thighs, you watched as he struggles to maintain eye contact with you. You threw your head back, your chest naturally puffing out, and closed your eyes as you basked in Kiyoshis stare. The sharp sound of the door closing shot your eyes open. You looked up, seeing the Sauna empty, leaving you and Kiyoshi behind. Kiyoshi, who’s stare had now turned carnivorous, was breathing heavily, chest rising and falling at a concerning rate, and the bulge under the towel looked painfully hard.

You didn’t think - unable to think due to the hormones in your body making you crave one thing and one thing only - you got up, not caring if the towel around your body had become loose, and walked over to Kiyoshi, who’s eyes grew wider with every step you took. You practically pounced on him - him latching onto your hips as soon as you were close enough - and you say on his lap, legs on either side of him on the wooden bench, feeling his bulge against your inner thigh. You both crawled at each-other, trying to close the gap between you as much as possible as your lips met, teeth clashing, tongues swirling. The wet sounds of the sloppy kiss bounced through the sauna. Your arms locked around his neck, feeling his damp hair in your fingers, while his hands gripped your hips, grinding you against him. You pulled away, trying to catch your breath, immediately moaning at the feeling of Kiyoshis lips on your neck. The quick pecks made their down your neck and to your shoulder. You pulled yourself closer to him, getting on your knees to lift yourself up as he went further down. The towel around you was barely hanging onto you as you slid across Kiyoshis chest, getting caught between you to and slipping off slightly. Kissing down your chest he finally came to your exposed breasts, stopping for a second before kissing the mound. A gentle kiss.

You looked down, meeting his dark brown eyes. You knew what he was asking, begging for practically, and the rushed kiss you placed on his lips gave him an answer. His hands came up from your hips, tugging at the towel around your chest and pulling it down. Your hard nipples brushed against his chest, and as if on queue, Kiyoshi broke the kiss and leaned down to attach his mount to one of your nipples. You threw your head back at the feeling of his tongue swirling around your nipple, the slight tug when he started to suck on your hard bud, and the pulsing sensation in your clit. He was sloppy, his spit getting everywhere, almost hungry, as he sucked on your nipple. His hand grabbing and fondling the other one.

You let out airy moans, whimpers, trying to muffle your noise by biting your bottom lip. Your hand went down his chest, feeling his hard muscles against your palm, until your fingers found the towel around his waist. You hooked your finger on the material, whimpering, and Kiyoshi pulled away from your nipple and looked at you - getting the memo immediately. No words exchanged, just pure lust leading the charge. His hands to the towel, his hips thrusting up slightly as he slid the towel off, his dick springing up against the towel around your waist.

You reached down to his dick,wrapping your fingers around his shaft and leaning down again to kiss him-

The sudden sound of the door opening made you turn your head - like a deer caught in headlights. “Times almost…” It didn’t take long for Hyuuga to register the sight infront of him. The sight of the teams manager sitting on his friends lap with her chest exposed. He stood at the door, face burning red as he stammered to form a sentence. “I- you - umm,” he trialed off as he looked from Kiyoshi to you.

“Hey Captain! Do you want some-“

In a flash, Hyuuga jumped in the sauna and slammed the door shut, hands fumbling to find the lock - the sudden clicking sound made him sigh in relief. He turned back to the two of you, trying to maintain his composure. “Can you - umm,” he was trying his best to have a stern, captain voice. “Can you-“ he cleared his throat, his face a deep shade of scarlet. He struggled to find the right words.

You let out a gasp to the sudden feeling of Kiyohis tongue flicking your nipple. Your body arching and fingers pulling at Kiyohis hair at the feeling. His hands trailed down your sides, grabbing the towel that was resting on your waist and pulling it off, revealing your body. His hands went down to your ass, his big hands cupping your ass and gently fondling them. He pulled away from your nipple, gripping onto your cheeks and spreading them open.

“You gonna join?” Kiyoshi said looking over to Hyuuga. His voice was low, dangerous. It made your core throb. His attention went back to your nipple, sucking on the one he had neglected. You heard footstep approach you, but your mind could only focus on Kiyoshi. “Teppie this isn’t-“ “Fuck her.” Kiyoshi growled before flicking your nipple with his tongue.

Kiyohis hands snaked to your hips, lifting you up further on your knees, his legs spreading open and pushing you to open your legs further. His hand went down your stomach to your pussy, his fingers grazing over your clit. Feeling the bud again this fingers he pressed down on it, moving his fingers in circular motions. You bucked your hips in the air, earning a smirk from him. Leaving your clit, his fingers went down to your hole, the slick coating his fingers. “She’s waiting, Junpei,” Kiyoshi cooed.

You looked back, seeing a nervous Hyuuga. He swallowed, looking down at your ass infront of him. He looked up, his eyes begging for your permission. Your heart started to practically boxing your rib cage at the sight - your brain wasn’t responding, as if it had blown a fuse - and you felt your body do the talking for you. You got up straight, Kiyoshi grabbing your hips to help keep you balanced. Staring back to Hyuuga, your breaths synced. You pushed your head towards him, mouth slightly open, eyes closing as you felt the best radiating off his skin grow closer. Unlike Kiyoshi, Hyuuga was gentle. His kiss lingering on before he pulled away. You felt his hands on your waist, going up towards your breasts. You moaned into the kiss when you felt his hands on your breasts, his palms over your nipples. He fondled your boobs, your hand going up to his gas and cupping it while the other went over his hand, squeezing his hand to show him how you wanted it.

“Fuck,” Kiyoshi moaned. You heard him spit, before the sloppy sound of him jerking off. The feeling of his head against the top of your slit, moving slightly as Kiyoshi jerked off. You let out a gasp, breaking the kiss, when you felt Kiyoshis head against your Clit, rubbing against it. Hyuuga hung onto your lower lip, biting it slightly. His fingers pinching your nipples. You heard the faint thud of Hyuuga towel hitting the floor, before Hyuuga pulled away, his hands going down behind you and up to your back, pushing you down towards Kiyoshi. Your grabbed into the ledge behind the bench, gripping it as you felt Kiyoshis needy tongue find your nipples again. Hyuuga pushed apart your ass, spitting down and spreading the spit over your pussy with his fingers.

You don’t know what was worse - the fact that you were getting railed by your team captain or the fact that you were getting railed by the team captain while on the lap of his best friend.

Hyuuga plows into you unforgivingly, a big contrast to how he was when he was kissing you. While Kiyoshi left hickies on your chest and abused your nipples, jerking off under you. Your mouth was open, a string of drool making it’s way down your chin. The wet sound of Hyuugas dick going in and out of you, mixed with the sloppy sucking coming from Kiyoshi drowned out your moans. And the sound of the door creaking open.

~

Rico had wondered why the sauna door had the sign flipped to ‘not occupied’ when he clearly suspected that some of the team members were still in there. Maybe they thought that the little switch was a lock and turned it. Opening the door she prepared to greet the team, poking her head in.

The cheery expression on her face faded when she saw the three team members that were in the sauna, her hand reaching for the key by the door and flipping it to ‘occupied’ before closing the door.

┗━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━┛

[adrunkskeletonsduck]

May I please request some Anakin Skywalker x jedi! reader, she’s from earth and she met Anakin during their padawan years. (y/n) has a different Jedi master, they're always excited to see each other after training. A few years later (y/n) and Anakin went to earth to visit (y/n)’s parents at Christmas. Anakin doesn’t know what Christmas is.

Anakin is very much welcome to her home, (y/n)’s parents treated Anakin like their own. (y/n) and Anakin spent time with one another and got together in the end.

honestly we all know Anakin needs some love and a place to call home. Thank you sm for the request!

Hᴏᴍᴇ

➜ Pairing: Anakin Skywalker x reader

➜ Synopsis: Christmas time was something you treasured greatly. Whether it be the gentle caress of the white wisps snow on the once sullen ground or the warmth of the crackling flames casting winding shadows along the house, it was a time you missed greatly. The holiday had been reduced to a far away memory during your time at the temple and now you presented the council a thinly veiled plea to return to your homeworld of earth to bear witness to the celebration after 15 years. Only this time you will bring a peice your new home to the familiarity of your former life.

➜ Warnings: Gn!reader, fluff

➜ Word Count: 2.6k

➜ Notes: I’m abt to hit 100 followers soon and I want to do an event but idk what to do, so pls send some ideas 🫰🏽. Also I’m so sorry for my inactivity last week and this week, I'm just super busy and in all honesty unmotivated asf 😭. Also i got a user name, hehehehe i love it sm, you better like it to >:(

Sᴛᴀʀᴡᴀʀs Mᴀsᴛᴇʀʟɪsᴛ

You remembered your early life on Earth. You remembered playing outside with your friends, coming home caked in mud to be scolded by your mother before she would push you into the shower and help clean you up. You remembered dressing up for Halloween, you remembered watching your favorite channels on nickelodeon and small bits of elementary school. Playing on the swings, talking to your teachers, and getting into petty arguments with classmates. You even remembered when the Jedi had knocked on your door and you agreed to go with them, you remembered the confusion at their words, and how you stood by your mother as they spoke to her.  

A Jedi?  

Your favorite and most prominent memory's, however, where around Christmas. You always were reminded of them as the year neared winter and the air grew cold. You often found yourself replaying them in your head during this time. The smell of freshly baked cookies every Christmas eve, running around with your cousins as you waited for dinner to be served while your aunts and uncles talked amongst themselves, sipping wine or beer. You remembered willing yourself to sleep, eager to wake up the next morning and see what Santa had left you under the Christmas tree.  

It was nearing the middle of December when finally, Anakin convinced you to ask the council about a visit, he had been listening to you talk about the tradition for years and could tell how badly you wanted to go back and experience it all again. The council, although hesitant, agreed and aloud you one other person to take with you for security measures, which you quickly decided would be Anakin since he was your closest and oldest friend in the order.  

The two of you were planned to arrive the week of Christmas, and come back the day after, which gave you plenty of time to take part in the festivities and catch up with old friends. Although you wouldn’t have minded one more day. You were very anxious about how this would go; you hadn't spoken to your parents or anyone from your home world since you had been taken, and the anxiety had been eating at you for days. 

What if they didn’t recognize you? What if they were angry at you for not reaching out? What if they were scared of you now that you were a true Jedi? What if they had moved on and forgotten you while you had clung to memories of them? The list of things that could go wrong only got longer with each passing moment that you and Anakin raced through hyperspace, and the worry seeped into your force signature.  

“I’m sure everything will turn out fine,” Anakin tried to assure you from where he sat next to you in the pilot's seat, but you just shook your head 

“I haven't seen any of them in years, I mean so many things could go wrong! Like, what if we bring the war to them!” you exclaimed, a new horror washing over you. It was Anakins turn to shake his head now,  

“The council gave us a ship with some of the best cloaking technology in the galaxy, the separatists couldn’t follow us out here if they tried. Besides I highly doubt they will turn their attention to a planet so far out.” You never understood how Anakin seemed to be able to soothe your nerves in a way no one else could. Well, you sort of understood, it was probably the small – massive – crush you had had on him since you were padawans at work.  

You let out a breath you didn’t realize you had been holding at his words, he was right. There was no reason to worry. “No, you're right, I need to get it together,” Anakin chuckled at your words in agreement, beginning to flip switches in the ship.  

“Alright were exiting hyperspace, buckle up.” You did as you were told, taking a deep breath as you exited hyper space and your home world came into view.  

You had only seen Earth from space once, and that was when you were leaving for the Jedi temple, the Jedi who found you had told you that you were the only force sensitive child from your planet and answering all your questions as you sped away from your home world, watching the planet get smaller and smaller and then disappear as you entered hyperspace. Other than that, though, you had only seen it from the satellite photos that your teacher showed you when you were studying the solar system. 

 It was a truly a beautiful sight, one that made a feeling of awe and joy wash threw you the minute you caught your first glimpse of it. Anakin glanced at you, a smile curling at his lips at your expression, content to see you so happy.  

You were here. You were home.  

The rest of the trip was spent in a comfortable silence until you landed, making sure to hide the ship well, despite its cloaking capabilities. Lucky for you, they lived in the country side in a small town, so there was plenty of forest to wedge the ship in between and under. You kept it not far from your parents' house in case the two of you needed to make an emergency escape. You vaguely remembered where your parents lived, you had faint memories of the exterior of the house but didn’t know the actual address. The council had somehow dug up all the quadrantes and such you needed though and supplied you with them, but you were a bit wary of their accuracy. 

You and Anakin didn’t exactly have very earth appropriate clothes to change into, so you did get weird looks from the locals while walking through town, especially because you were practically skipping out of delight, but you couldn’t seem care less. The excitement of being back here, back home, after such a long time distracted you from their judgmental eyes and Anakin didn’t think he had ever seen you so happy in his life as he watched you point out yet another area, place, or name that had a story tied to it, nodding as you explained it to him enthusiastically. 

The minute you stood in front of the house, you instantly knew that it was the right one, you could feel the two faintly familiar force signatures inside and the beaten down porch and door mat instantly rung a bell of familiarity. You stopped in front of the door, taking a shaky breath and trying to shove all your anxieties down. You looked to Anakin for support, your expression telling him everything he needed to know as he took your hand in his, giving it a gentle squeeze and giving you an encouraging nod. You pursed your lips, your hold on his hand tightening ever so slightly as you brought your other hand to the wood of the door and gave it a firm knock.  

Once 

Twice 

Three times 

It took a painfully long moment before you began to hear the padding of footsteps getting closer, and then stop as the door swung open, squealing on its hinges as it opened harshly. Your eyes widened as you looked at her, your mother, for the first time in fifteen years, it felt like a dream. Your breath hitched in your throat, at the sight of her.  

“I already told you peo-” she started, but cut herself off at the sight of you. Recognition flashing through her eyes as she looked at you. You didn’t give her time to process that you were actually there, throwing yourself at her, and wrapping your arms around her tightly. Tears filled in both your eyes, and she slid her arms around you.  

“Welcome home honey...”  

___ 

It had been five days since you’d arrived, now you sat cozied up on the couch, wrapped in a fuzzy blanket in front of the lit fireplace and a warm cup of hot chocolate in your hand, enjoying the sight of your family all together once again. You’d already caught up with everyone earlier, introduced yourself to some of the younger cousins that were a relatively new addition to your family and you’d never met before, as well as your oldest cousin's new husband and your new niece. You’d talked to your aunts and uncles, exchanged tight hugs with them and watched as they looked at you in disbelief. It had felt good knowing that they had missed you as much as you had missed them.  

You watched as your relatives chattered around you, passing around neatly wrapped and bagged presents as they played white elephant on the floor of the living room. The Christmas tree glowed with colorful lights in the corner of the room, and Anakin chatted happily away with one of your uncles. He’d fit in nicely with your family, being excepted with open arms by everyone. Although it had taken him a minute to warm up to your parents, they both had been patient with him, and you could tell he appreciated it greatly. He especially seemed to appreciate the warmth and hospitality that your mother had shown him, and you hopped it had eased the pain of losing his own, even if it was the smallest of comfort to him, you were glad he knew that he had a home here.  

“So,” your mother started, sitting down next to you and pulling the blanket over herself, breaking you out of the trance you were in, “how have the Jedi been treating you these past few years?” 

The entire time since you’d arrived, she had been talking about it like you had simply been gone for a year or two in college, not for fifteen years in a boarding school for people with powers. None the less you smiled at her as you answered, the joy of being home had rooted itself deep in your emotions this past week, you weren't sure it would ever leave. Even after you left.  

“Well, the best it can treat us in the midst of a galactic war,” you joked. She furrowed her brow at your answer, obviously not amused by your joke, “Of course it’s nothing you have to worry about though,” you added quickly in an attempt to reassure her.  

“That doesn’t sound ver-” she started, a deep frown on her face, but she was quickly cut off by Anakin who had seemingly appeared out of thin air behind you and clasped his hands onto your shoulders, sending you a wink which made your face heat up as he spoke,  

“I wouldn’t worry too much about this girl, she knows what she's doing on the field and with a saber.” Your mother, however, didn’t seem very reassured at his words. “Besides,” he continued, “I’ve got her back.”  

She looked at you, a raised eyebrow and motherly judgment painted on her face as if to silently ask ‘just friends?’ for the millionth time that week. You answered with a role of your eyes and a weak glare. She just chuckled, getting up from her spot on the couch, a smile on her face to replace the look of worry that had previously been there as she looked at Anakin.  

“Well, I’m sure she’s in good hands then,” she said pausing as she caught Anakin glancing at you, and a small smirk tugged at her lips, “I’ll give you two some space.” Then she turned, walking out to the dining room were your uncles and aunts sat with glasses of wine and an endless list of topics for conversation.  

“Have you packed yet?” Anakin asked as he took the spot next to you, and you sighed at his words, leaning into him ever so slightly, chasing his warmth.  

“No...” you replied, without looking at him and continuing to watch the game of white elephant that was beginning to come to a close. Anakin hummed at your words,  

“You probably should tonight, we leave at noon tomorrow.”  

“Yeah,” you agreed, “I probably should.” Your hold on your cup of coco tightened, something that didn’t go unnoticed by Anakin, and neither did the gentle sadness that began to roll of you in waves at the talk of leaving. He understood what it was like all too well, and he didn’t want to be the reason you spent the last of a very enjoyable night in sadness, so he cleared his throat and got up, extending a hand out to you.  

“Why don’t we take a short walk?” he suggested, and you nodded taking his hand and letting him help you up. Throwing on a coat, you told your mom that you and Anakin were going to step out for a minute, and you’d be right back.  

Shutting the door behind you as you followed him out, you told him, “I don’t want to think about leaving right now,” he nodded in understanding.  

“Then we don’t have to talk about it.” You didn’t let go of his hand as you walked down the drive way and off the property to begin on your route around the block. At that moment he was like your anchor, keeping you grounded in the moment, and bringing you back to reality. Reminding you that right now you were still on Earth, that for now the Jedi, the war, the Sith, all of it, didn’t exist. For now, all that existed was you and him, here, in this moment. Neither of you would have had it any other way.  

Soon the two of you found yourselves at the park, laying side by side in the fields of grass and staring up at the sky, fingers still threaded together. Anakin was the one to break the silence,  

“y/n?”  

“Yeah?” 

“I’m in love with you,” he blurted and you sucked in a sharp breath at his confession. There was a long pause of silence were the air seemed to become thick as butter, and everything seemed to stop.  All of a sudden you were back at the temple, seeing him for the first time. Your heart was racing at every word he spoke or glance your way, and you were stuttering and tripping over your words while your cheeks flamed a deep red as you tried to talk to him.  

You could feel Anakins nerves as he waited for a response from you, while you contemplated your answers. These feelings were against the code, and admitting them would be your final act of treason. You weren't sure you cared at the moment though. Anakin was already looking at you when you turned to him and pressed your lips to his.  

The kiss was sudden and unexpected, and you could tell he hadn't been prepared for it by the way he froze, every muscle in his body tensing and you couldn’t see it but his eyes were wide in shock as well. But after a moment, his heart beat slowed back to a normal pace and his eyes slipped shut and he relaxed into you, kissing you back, his lips molding against yours in an endless flurry of kisses, each more passionate then the last. His lips were soft and you could taste the lingering sweetness of desert on them as you kissed him.  

He was the one to pull away, making you whine quietly and lean forward, chasing his lips. He chuckled at the sound of displeasure you let out, a signature smirk tugging at his lips which made you roll your eyes at and push yourself up.  

“Common,” you said, reaching a hand down to him, “we should start getting home.” He took your hand graciously, letting you help him to his feet as he agreed with you.  

“Yeah, we should.”  

[bubuslutty]

Bambi with fangs pt. 3

all parts

pairing: lumberjack!frank castle x (mutant) vampire!fem reader

word count: 2.9k

tags: mutants exist, (kinda) drug use and substance abuse (from someone else), no use of y/n, 3rd person pov, no descriptions of physical appearance, poc friendly

warning: mention of drug use, overdosing, drinking & orgies

summary: Frank and Bambi’s relationship evolves, Peter is cute and helpful, we actually get lumberjack Frank in action!!! (kinda but still 😋) Bambi starts getting comfortable and visits the Church, that's it.

a/n: okay I lied. I ended up writing more but it's just world building and we're not done yet. there's one part left. the smut. that's it. I think I wrote abt everything I wanted to write. + ik I said miss girl was a playboy model but in this au u don't have to be skinny to be one. u can look like anything and be a playboy bunny. fuck beauty standards.

After the appearance of the mutant, Frank found himself noticing things he has never paid attention to before. For example, the magazine cutouts taped to the fridge and the walls of the cabin he and the other lumberjacks use to eat lunch in and take breaks.

Frank’s hand was on the handle of the fridge, staring silently at the picture of a woman wearing a black set of lingerie and a huge fur coat, posing in front of a truck, a seductive smile painted on her lips. He took a deep breath, feeling heat brewing in his stomach and snatched the picture, folding it and shoving it inside his pocket.

“Shit.” He cursed and turned around, completely abandoning the beer he wanted and walked out of the kitchen, straight to his parked truck.

“Frank!” A young man, by the name of Donny Chavez, waved his hand at Frank with a wide grin, making Frank stop in his tracks.

“Let’s have lunch together, man!” Donny said, patting Frank on his back.

Frank rolled his eyes and kept walking to his truck, his lunch, in a paper bag, clutched in one hand.

“Don’t act like you don’t enjoy my company, Frank.” Donny teased, hopping on Frank’s hood, in his usual spot on the left while Frank sat on the right each lunch break.

“Yeah, yeah.” Frank nodded, a small smile tugging at his lips as he opened his lunch bag. “Another sandwich today?” Donny asked and watched Frank take out two plastic containers.

“Show me.” Donny leaned in, making Frank grunt and turn his back on the curious man.

Frank opened the first container and smiled when he was faced with well-seasoned chicken and rice. When the delicious smell hit Donny’s nostrils, he licked his lower lip, feeling his mouth water, “Did you make that?”

“No,” Frank answered and took the other container, lifting it to see what it was and hummed when he saw a slice of orange cheesecake.

“Is that homemade??” Donny asked, completely flabbergasted because, during all the time he and Frank worked together, Frank only had slightly above mediocre lunches, except when he got something from Peter’s Aunt. 

“Yeah,” Frank answered, taking the lid off the first container and the metal fork in the bag, ready to dig in.

Donny stared at Frank with his sandwich wrapped in cling film in his hand, “You’re not telling me something.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Frank shrugged and happily ate his delicious homemade lunch.

As soon as he stabbed his fork into a piece of chicken and took a bite of the tender meat, Donny gripped his arm hard.

“What?” Frank glared at the younger man.

Donny was not even looking at Frank, he was looking to the far right, towards the road as two familiar people walked towards the cabin.

“Who the hell is that?” Donny said, his voice cracking at the end and he coughed, clearing his throat. Frank glanced at the man and back at the two people who didn’t seem to notice him. He placed his lunch on the hood of his truck and started walking towards the cabin, hyperaware of everyone looking, staring.

“Do you know her? Hm? Can you introduce me?” Donny scrambled to follow Frank, abandoning his poor excuse of a sandwich next to Frank’s lunch. “No.” Frank gritted out through clenched teeth.

“No? Why not? Wait so you do know her??? Why didn’t tell me you knew such a se-” Donny snorted and almost swallowed his tongue when Frank turned around to grab his collar, “Watch your mouth, Chavez.” 

Donny nodded wide-eyed, letting out a shaky breath when Frank let go of his collar.

“Excuse me, do you know where’s Frank?” Peter asked a random man leaning against the door of the cabin, a cigarette between his lips as he literally ate up the woman next to Peter.

“Who’s asking?” The man smirked, grabbing the cigarette with two fingers and straightening up, looking at the woman. Peter frowned and glanced at Bambi next to him, who held eye contact with the man with a poker face, “Peter. That’s who’s asking.” She easily replied and Peter watched with awe and disgust how the man seemed to be even more entranced with her as soon as she spoke.

“Nah, I wanna know your name, baby.” He said and Peter glared at the man but Bambi didn’t seem surprised by the display of audacity. “My name?” She repeated, pointing at herself as she bit her lower lip with a sharp fang. Peter’s senses started tingling and he grabbed her arm as soon as he saw Frank speed walking towards them, “There he is!”

Bambi’s attention was immediately placed on Frank and a smile pulled at her lips. “Frank! You forgot your thermos at home!” She said and dug her hand in her bag, pulling the thermos he uses for coffee to take to work because the coffee they have in the cabin is trash according to him.

“What are you doing here?” Frank asked when he reached her, standing right in front of the woman, partly shielding her from the lustful eyes with his bulk. “Getting you your thermos.” She answered, tilting her head to the side and holding it in both hands.

“Thank you, but you could’ve just sent Peter.” Frank mumbled, completely ignoring Donny standing next to him. “Now, why would I do that?” Bambi asked, a teasing smile on her lips, trying her hardest not to giggle at Frank’s poorly hidden panic.

“You’re very distracting.” He hissed under his breath.

“Distracting? I’m not wearing anything distracting though.” She pouted, glancing down at her clothes. That day she was wearing a white tight tank top that left a good chunk of her midriff naked, a pair of low-rise jeans, and heeled leather ankle boots with a huge fur coat on top, to keep her warm and cosy.

Bambi looked at Frank’s clenched jaw and smirked, “Here’s your coffee.” She handed him the thermos and he silently grabbed it from her.

“Who’s your friend?” She tilted her chin towards a practically vibrating Donny.

“I’m Donny! Donny Chavez, Frank’s literal best friend.” He introduced himself with a grin, wiping his palms in his jeans before sticking one hand out. Bambi grinned, shaking his hand, “I’m Bambi, nice to meet you, Donny.” 

“So, are you like… a friend of Frank?” Donny asked the stunning woman.

“Something like that.” She smiled and didn’t see how Frank and Peter glanced at each other at the same time, surprise evident on their faces.

Something like that?

“Well, I just came down to give you this.” She said, clapping her hands together when she turned to Frank. “Oh, you’ve got a little something in your-” Bambi cupped Frank’s cheek and stood unnecessarily close to his face, picking something he couldn’t see from his thick beard.

“There.” She smiled, patting his cheek and leaning forward to place a kiss on the corner of his mouth. “See you tonight, and don’t be late.”

Frank shivered when her sweet breath hit his cheek and clenched his hands into fists so he wouldn’t grab her hips and devour her sweet little mouth in front of everyone.

Peter fixed his beanie on his brown curls, smirking as his senses picked up Frank’s racing heartbeat. “It was nice meeting you Donny, bye bye!” Bambi waved at the two men and interlocked her arm with Peter’s, walking away with a satisfied smile on her lips.

.

.

.

A few days after the accident at Josie’s, Frank convinced Bambi to stay with him for the time being instead of getting a room in the motel nearby, he knows from experience that they aren’t anywhere close to safe for a runaway like her. Bambi reluctantly accepted and offered to pay him some money as rent, but he refused. Frank told her he would be happy if she kept the place she was sleeping in tidy and would clean after herself, and he wouldn’t be against her making homemade meals either.

Frank also stumbled upon the same magazine Peter found at the newsagent, in his kitchen, near a stack of letters. He remembers it vividly as if it happened this morning. Frank was checking the cupboards, and the food Bambi bought the day before, and chuckling at the diverse selection of pastries and cakes from the bakery.

The pink magazine was sitting there, and the bright colour caught his attention, tilting his head to the side and sliding it off the counter, now in his hands. His eyes slowly widened at the cover, he felt an odd mixture of desire, shame and embarrassment soar through him. Taking him right back to when he was just a teenager, with naughty magazines under his bed, in an attempt to hide them from his mum and dad. She looked different, not in a bad way, just different. Her hair was a different colour, and the makeup she had on was also different from the type people wear these days. But her eyes were the same.

The way she was looking at the camera, at him, at the viewer. Her eyes were hypnotising, swimming with mystery, danger and beauty. Frank doesn’t even know her real name. There was a name, at the bottom of the page, with ‘the model:’ written in front of it, but it was a stupid stage name, not her real name. Frank knows she’s so much older than him, Peter told him, and the magazine’s proof on top of her unchanging face and features. 

He just doesn’t know how old exactly, or if she even has one real name, it’s very likely that she has many names she’s lived under. 

Frank slapped the magazine down on the counter, face down and took a deep breath, trying to get rid of the arousal that was brewing deep in his guts.

Later, Bambi revealed how she ended up in the state Frank found her in that night they met. It turns out she fed from a man who later overdosed and died in one Playboy club, and Bambi had no choice but to run away or she will be blamed for the man’s death. So she had a lethal dose of drugs circulating in her system, and her body had to use all of its energy to get rid of it, hence why she was passed out on the floor at Josie’s. She told him she just ran to her place, threw clothes in a bag and ran away as far as the gas in her car could take her.

Peter one day asked Bambi why she decided to become a model. It didn’t seem like it was a good career choice for a mutant like her who lived many years and can easily catch the attention of dark organisations. Bambi revealed that she mostly got into it because it was a perfect way to feed without getting in trouble. Mutants like her, who feed on human blood are not necessarily welcome in society and the public would rather get them killed than try to give them a silver of rights like other mutants, who are less threatening and predatory to the non-mutated human race like her. Turns out that Hollywood celebrities, supermodels and rich folks enjoy attending parties every week where absolutely anything can happen and get covered up with mum and dad’s money and influence. 

So you can imagine that Bambi attended those parties every time she needed to feed because no one would bat an eye if she bit someone in the neck, a lot of rich people are weird and are into freaky shit like that. They would hold huge orgies, get drunk and drugged up and participate in illegal practices just because it gets them going. So Bambi feeding on someone is not bizarre to them. This went on for many years, and nobody suspected her as a mutant who doesn’t age, she simply lied and gave them excuses like plastic surgery, washing her face with imported products from South Korea and having a special diet. 

And plus, why can’t she have fun for once? Bambi loved clothes and feeling pretty, so she might as well try being a model and then a Playboy bunny at least once in her long life.  

.

.

.

While Bambi decided to stay in town, she had time to go around and explore a bit, sometimes with Peter, sometimes just by herself.

One day she ended up in the Church, sitting and staring silently at the big cross hung above the altar until she felt someone sit next to her. Bambi slowly glanced to the side and was met with fluffy ginger hair and red-tinted glasses perched on a nose with a plaster. The man was dressed in black, a walking stick gripped in one bandaged hand.

Bambi raised one brow, subtly inhaling the air around the man next to her and smelled a hint of copper, fresh bruises and tender skin under soft fabric with traces of disinfectant.

“What happened to you?” She asked the man.

“Got mugged.” He answered, facing forward, towards where the empty altar was.

Bambi frowned, she wasn’t someone who was that religious, sure she knew that there must be something out there, whether it was God or something else entirely, but she knew the heaviness of lying in the house of God.

“Lying in the house of God?” She hummed, making the man’s hand on his cane twitch.

“We all got secrets.” He simply answered.

“I suppose we do.” Bambi shrugged and turned to stare at the cross.

After a long while of silence between them, she shifted in her seat and glanced again at the man and didn’t say anything. The man next to her was suspicious, he didn’t smell mutant, but he wasn’t just a normal human. Maybe she was reading too much into his body language but she swore she saw him slightly tilt his head in many directions earlier. She knew blind people had generally better hearing than people who can perfectly see, but this guy was making her skin itch, like the same itch she gets when someone dangerous is around and her instincts start telling her to be careful.

Bambi then decided to test this man and willed her heartbeat even slower than it already was. So much slower, that it was barely beating and watched how the man slowly frowned, his frown deepening and one of his hands clenching and unclenching. She stared at him in awe, until he turned his head to face her and she was finally graced with how pretty he was, a bit beaten up and rough but still pretty.

“Stop that.” He gritted through his teeth.

“Stop what?” Bambi asked instead.

“You know what I’m talking about. It’s unsettling.” He said, making her instantly feel bad.

Bambi immediately stopped and her heartbeat went back to normal, making her take a deep breath.

“Sorry, just wanted to see if you were someone I had to watch out for…” She apologised, clasping her hands against her chest. 

The man didn’t say anything so Bambi spoke, “I’m Bambi, by the way.” 

She smiled and stuck out her hand and the man slowly reached out and shook it.

“Matt.” 

“Nice to meet you, Matt.” Bambi grinned and Matt gave her a short nod.

“You don’t have to tell me anything, but I know you’re not a mutant, and you’re not a normal good-looking guy either, so what’s your secret?” She asked, turning her body to the side so she can fully face him and throwing an arm over the back of his chair.

Matt cracked a small smile, “Normal good-looking guy?”

“I’m not repeating that twice, so what are you? You know my secret.” Bambi said, biting her lower lip, amusement evident on her face.

“Why would I? You’re quite reckless about giving out information like that, who said I won’t betray you and sell your secret?” Matt asked, smirking and running a hand through his fluffy hair, moving it away from his face, but it was futile because it fell against his forehead right after.

“Because I’ll find you and break you.” Bambi shrugged with a fangy grin.

“You’ll beat up a blind guy?” Matt grinned.

“I’ll do more than beat you up if you sell me out,” Bambi said.

“Very well, when I was a child, I got into a car accident and lost my sight and got an enhanced sense of hearing,” Matt partially revealed, making her eyes widen. 

“You actually trusted me...” Bambi gasped, in awe.

“I did. Because if you sell me out I will find you and break you.” Matt growled, making her blush instead of feeling intimidated.

“You’re confident.” She pointed out.

“It’s not going to be hard with a scent like yours.” He shrugged.

“Wait, scent?? You can smell me???” Bambi asked with wide eyes, grabbing his arm.

“Alright, no more questions.” Matt laughed making her even more curious and squeezed the hand that was on his arm.

“You’re no fun!” Bambi whined.

“I don’t think so,” He chuckled and stood up, making her stand with him as well. “I have to get going.”

“Can I walk you out?” She asked and he nodded. Matt linked his arm to hers and the two slowly walked out of the Church, when they were standing right at the entrance, Bambi and Matt stopped, turning to face each other.

“It was nice talking to you, Matt. And don’t get mugged again, at least not too hard.” She said, fixing his collar and Matt cracked a smile, “I’ll be careful.”

When she was done, Matt gave her a small nod and turned around to leave, walking stick in hand.

“Oh, and Matt!” Bambi suddenly said, making him stop in his tracks, his back facing her.

“Your secret’s safe with me, I promise.”

Matt smiled, “I know.”

[little-cereal-draws]

Ok if Bal and Ambrosius are nimonas dads now, can Dr Blitzmeyer be the crazy aunt?

I think at first nimona would be defensive/unsure abt her bc she would be quite curious abt nimonas shapeshifting and ask a lot of questions. But once it becomes obvious nimona doesn’t want to talk abt it, dr Blitzmeyer would drop it and move on to smth else. Eventually nimona would warm up to her, (she’s nice to Ballister, doesn’t give a flying fuck abt nimona being a “monster,” and can match Nimona’s chaotic energy pretty easily when it comes to her work) but it takes a while

The thing that made nimona finally decide for sure that she liked her was dr blitzmeyer took her out to assist with some field work one day. Nimonas reluctant to go at first bc it’ll be the first time they’re going to be alone together for an extended amount of time and science does not interest her at all. She goes anyway, dragging her heels the whole time, but quickly realizes this isn’t like her outings w Bal in the slightest.

Dr Blitzmeyer enlists her help prying some boards off a window of an abandoned building and nimonas like “wait,,, we’re breaking and entering? Going into a building that’s full of safety violations?? Trespassing on private property???” And dr Blitzmeyers like “yeah. How else are we going to track ghosts?” And nimona just looks at her with stars in her eyes and whispers “you’re my favorite now.”

They come back from that trip as thick as thieves. Bal doesn’t know how in the world dr blitzmeyer got nimona to actually be excited abt helping w her experiments but he’s glad it happened. It’s a quite frequent occurrence now for nimona to lounging on the couch all day, being no help to anybody, but jump up when dr blitzmeyer comes over, begging to help her w her work. It baffles Bal to no end lol

[qprsmackdown]

IRL/OC Bracket FINAL: C & G vs Michael and Mantis!

C & G propaganda:

Ok so these next few paragraphs are copy pasted from what I wrote on queering the map. Hope it makes you cry :) (Entries were written around mid-2020, with the last being written in 2023)

My school had a field trip to this park, my best friend and I found a quiet spot under some trees. I set up the blanket/mat I had brought, she propped up an umbrella. We laid down beside each other face-to-face. That was the first time I ever felt tempted to kiss someone. To this day I consider it as one of my gayest moments (right next to asking her out and later on asking her to be my qpp on a ferris wheel XD)

November(?) 2017 - We were talking about your maybe-crush on a friend when you mentioned that you used to have a crush on me. I confessed about my past crush on you too and started flirting with you. "Have you moved on from her? Will you be my girlfriend? We don't have to put a label on it or anything yet we can just-" "Yes" We dated for a month (full of silly puns and cheek kisses and gifts from Japan) before we broke up (can you blame us? we were twelve and our dads found out) but you're still my very best friend. I love you G - C

February 2020 - Day of the school fair, I had everything planned for a perfect day for you and me... until you brought along a classmate who had no one to hang out with and you were too kind to say no. We went on all of the rides, the three of us, and you mentioned how you have always wanted someone to dedicate a song to you at the song booth. I went out to reserve one, and then I stayed with you until both of you had to leave for your shifts. That's when I put my plan into action. I reserved a sunflower at the Lovebooth (I knew you liked sunflowers because of a certain character (the roses were way too romantic anyways)) and when you came back we got into line at the Ferris wheel with our other friends. While waiting my dedicated song finally played, and you turned to me with nearly the happiest smile I've ever saw on you. When we were getting closer I went to get my reserved sunflower, but the line was slow so I ended up asking my aunt to hold it for me. When the line was nearly there I got it back from her and our other friends helped me to hide it (Your sister wanted to ride with us but I told her my plan and she changed her mind). You got on and as you turned to face me I held out your sunflower. When we got to the top of the Ferris Wheel I asked what I had been planning to ask you for a week. "I don't know much about it yet, I still have to research more but... G, would you be my queer platonic partner?" You smiled the happiest smile I've ever seen on you that day. G, we haven't talked much since quarantine started, but I want you to know that I love you. I'm not sure what kind (romantic or platonic) but I know that you have a special place in my heart. I can't wait for this to be all over and for us to be by each other's side, drawing and reading and just talking about the things we never share with anybody else. I love you - C

July 2023 - The school fair was over 3 years ago, can you believe? So much has changed since then, quarantine happened, we were reduced to online classes, and I ended up moving to the States for a chance of a better life. We kept in touch, of course, through messages screaming over fandoms and platonic marriages on minecraft servers (how dare you for suggesting that before i knew abt cbeeduo >:( ) and like 5 meet ups over the summers. But it wasn't enough, and timezones and a desire for a more physical (in a actually there beside you sort of way) relationship eventually culminated in you asking to break it off two weeks before I met up with you in the Philippines. God damn it G, why didn't you wait? I had it all planned in my head. The night of my debut, as all my guests were leaving, I would take you to a private corner where we would talk, and I admit to you that yes, maybe my feelings for you turned out more romantic than I initially thought, but with the physical distance it wasn't right for us to pursue something of that nature, especially as I had wanted to try dating in college and didn't want to end up hurting you. I would say I love you and maybe leave you with a kiss, and that was how we'd gain closure. Well the kiss didn't happen and you laughed when I scolded you for not waiting before you admitted that yeah, you felt the same way but also agreed that our level of commitment wasn't right for us, not anymore. You promised me that if by the time we were done with college we were both single we could try again, but I won't hold you to that. G, thank you for being my bestest friend and first love, and I'm sorry that life didn't work out the way we had planned. I love you though, whether romantically or platonically, and I hope you're happy with where you end up in life - Yours always, C

anddddd that's it! veered a little romantic at times, but whats more queerplatonic than a relationship that blurs the lines of platonic and romantic eh? at the end of the day, we're still best friends and we care for each other deeply, even if we no longer officially label it as a qpr. hope our story made you cry >:D

More C & G Propaganda!

Michael and Mantis propaganda:

we're both boygirls and girlfaggots and boydykes, you literally cannot get queerer than this. gay in every direction

we're also both autistic and have adhd. leads to some fun conversations where one of us listens intently while the other is going off about whatever interest they've got the brainworms for at the moment and it's the most fun i will ever have (common topics are: good movies, tragedies and shipwrecks, cannibalism, the absurdly powerful dnd podcast just roll with it, and many more)

we're long distance and we really need this win bc the earth is literally homophobic and keeping us apart and making us sad :(

michael has this whole mushroom/lichen/microorganisms/rot thing going and i have the space thing going and they're essentially the same things but on different scales (life and death and life in death etc etc), so we're thematically compatible. we were made for each other frfr

uuhhhh mental health improvement i guess

we tricked at least three people into thinking we were dating before we actually started dating. not on purpose

we started dating on april fools! that's fun!

same trauma and same issues. we get a lot of mileage out of relating to each other

i keep breaking my sleep schedule for him

uhm. also. we're really niceys and cool and stuff :3

More Michael and Mantis Propaganda!

[demons-and-demigods]

Demons and Demigods Part Thirteen: Dreams are Weird, and Everybody's Confused

Heyyyyyy sorry for dropping off the face of the earth, whoops. I got distracted by other projects and going on vacation so I haven't done much work on this au in a while. But! I have a short little update here for you! I had originally planned to turn at least some of this into a fully written scene, and I might come back to do that at some point, but for now, have some nonsense that amuses me.

I wanted to do some episode rewrites for the spn boys because I missed them, and decided I'd do it for Ghostfacers and/or Jus in Bello. However, it felt weird to just veer away from the Argo II crew since there's so much going on there, and my brother suggested doing the episode rewrites through the viewpoint of Percy's weird ass demigod dreams so I started whipping up ideas for that because it immediately tickled me thinking about Percy watching the Ghostfacers nonsense go down.

I don't think there's much of anything for Jus in Bello mentioned here, I kinda fixated on Ghostfacers and then another idea I had instead. Anyway, here's some incorrect quotes style things I was thinking about and a bit of stream-of-consciousness writing.

Percy, dreaming on the Argo II: [witnessing Sam and Dean dealing with the Ghostfacers bullshit] The Ghostfacers: you have to go be gay for that poor dead intern/gay love can pierce through the veil of death to save the day Percy, a queer, waking up: what the fuck?  ~ Percy, dreaming: [eavesdropping on Sam and Dean's convos] Sam and Dean: [bickering about Dean only having a few months left] Percy, waking up and immediately Iris Messaging them: hey, the FUCK you mean Dean only has a few months left what the hades are you talking about? Sam and Dean: [high-pitched, startled screaming and flailing that ends up disconnecting the IM] Percy: . . . Rude. 

PERCY PARTY CRASHES ONE OF SAM OR DEAN'S DREAMS JUST LIKE 'oh hey haven't done this in a while' AND SAM/DEAN IS JUST LIKE 'WHY TF IS THIS KID HERE?' Bonus points: it's Dean's dream and it's a ~Trauma~ dream abt John being an abusive shit stain when he was little and Percy is just like oh fuck that actually and intervenes in the dream-memory to kill John (like mother like son) and then he and Dean trauma-bond over abusive 'dads' (Percy: hey next time I'm in the underworld I'll ask Uncle H if he knows where John is. that fucker better be in Hell or the Fields of Punishment and if he's not, he will be. // Dean: 👁️👄👁️ ) 

Dean pov on Percy gate crashing his dream and killing dream-john and them trauma-bonding over abusive ‘dads’ (neither John nor Gabe should be called a dad but for the sake of brevity). Percy pov on him watching the Ghostfacers nonsense through his weird ass dreams and overhearing the ‘Dean, you only have a few months left’ convo and resolving to call/IM the boys when he has the time to do so to demand an explanation for that bullshit and then Sam dropped the bomb that his brother is a dumbass and sold his soul to bring Sam back to life and now Dean only has a few months left before hellhounds are gonna come after him to drag his ass down to Hell and Percy is just like gods damn dude that’s some serious shit why didn’t you ask for our help? Did you ask for help from anyone in the Greek world? 

And Dean is very firmly like no we didn’t and we aren’t going to. Aunt Sally has enough on her plate to worry about without adding my impending doom on top of it and we don’t exactly know anyone else in the Greek world, let alone how to get in contact with them. Also, anyone we do know would no doubt tell Aunt Sally about it and like I said, I’m not laying that on her. (Because he’s dumb.) 

And Percy’s just like, what the fuck man, I mean I get it I always sanitize my quest stories for mom so she doesn’t freak out too much but still. What the fuck dude. And they have that whole heavy conversation where Percy promises to look into things on his end for any way to get Dean outta his deal and if nothing else talk to Uncle H and see if he can’t jailbreak Dean’s soul for him or smth. (Percy does, in fact, later ask Hades, begs him actually, to help Dean, to bring him back, to at least steal him and put him somewhere better than the Christian equivalent of the Fields of Punishment. Hades has to gently tell him I’m sorry but there’s nothing I can do and he is genuinely remorseful that he can’t help out his nephew because he has grown fond of him and he would be more than happy to personally place Dean Winchester’s soul in Elysium if he could but he can’t and so he holds his nephew as he sobs, mourning the loss of another loved one whose life was cut too short and prays that the Fates or the Christian God or whoever is in control of this all will give Percy a fucking break and that someone will free Dean Winchester from Hell.) (Enter Castiel, Gay Ass Angel of the Lord, who will grip Dean tight and raise his fine ass from perdition.) (But I am once again getting ahead of myself. So.) 

Devolved a bit into my Destiel agenda there at the end, but this is my weird ass au and I do what I want lmao

Like I said at the start, I might come back to this at some point and fully write out the Ghostfacers nonsense, but for now, I'm gonna leave it at this and try to focus on figuring out what scene to cover next for the Argo II crew. I'll try not to fuck off into oblivion again but no promises, sorry.

[redcliffed]

since you said to be more specific if i wanted to know more then can you talk abt what youve mapped out of grells and madams relationship? redcliff is my otp so i would love to hear what you think of the red murder wives

ok so!! my biggest thing w them is that to me they are just. horrible for each other. they are soulmates they are tied together by the red string of fate but god is it unhealthy. like if u build a relationship off of brutally murdering ppl ur not gonna have a healthy dynamic i’m sawrry (ESPECIALLY when it ends with murder. u don’t kill ur gf that casually if ur relationship is healthy). there’s so little content of them but the bits we see seem pretty tumultuous (i base a lot off that one rainbow butler one shot bc that shit was so gay but sooo toxic it’s scrumptious) so i just run with it! they’re both very mentally ill and homicidal that shit was doomed from the start

the whole relationship like a slow build from their first meeting bc anne is immediately like Live With Me and they’re inexplicably drawn to each other (read: horny) but it’s a slow evolution from yearning and going marginally insane and probably like drunk making out they refuse to talk abt after to insane love confessions and kinda just running with the idea that they’re basically married. and the whole time it’s just a constant flux between desperately needing each other always and divorce worthy fighting. so much divorce worthy fighting.

grell falls HARD like really fucking hard like despite being the world’s worst gf she’s also more invested. she has insane tunnel vision for anne like she abandoned her whole life for her so ofc she does!! it’s a genuine obsession and it’s so unhealthy and she’s desperately needy and anytime it feels like it may be crumbling she goes hard on trying to sabotage bc she will not leave until the bridge is burnt to fucking ASH (she’s also insanely impulsive abt it like the minute she regains common sense she’s just like “why did i do that” and then wants to rekill herself so bad).

anne is very very infatuated but she’s kind of the normaler party in the sense that she can have a life outside of grell (and grell does not like that). she’s a workaholic abt the murder and also about the Being An Aunt and she’s having a crisis of morality at all times and this makes her very preoccupied but also lowkey without grell she’d kill herself. grell is like her key to being able to live with herself morally it’s like. “no one will love me with how horrible i’m being but this bitch not only loves me but also condones my atrocities!! if she leaves me i’m blowing up the world.” but the thing is she’s confident enough that grell Won’t leave her to not be as invested in her. and she’s also not afraid to be a frigid bitch when she’s pissed at her and can be so extremely hot and cold about everything it’s absolutely insanity inducing.

they’re stuck in this insane loop of being madly in love, anne kinda zoning out of everything and getting cold, grell vying for attention via acting out or manipulation or cheating or something, Big Fight, and then back to being madly in love and they NEVER WANNA STOP bc they understand each other so deeply and fundamentally in a way no one else ever will!! they enable the worst parts of each other and they feel so safe with each other. they’re each other’s home but god that home is the worst place you’ve ever stepped foot in.

there’s also an internalized homophobia layer going on for sure that definitely does not help things. esp bc anne was probably grell’s bi awakening. i always write madam red as a lesbian who has already unpacked that and dealt with it so while she has like. period typical internalized homophobia it’s way less of a Thing for her. but for grell it’s just like Oh God What Is Happening Why Do I Want To Live In Her Skin What Are The Gender Implications Of This I Am Having A Bad Time!! so like the double whammy of a full blown sexuality crisis and first time doing commitment r driving her a little insane the whole time.

it also makes grell nerfing anne a lot less random in my brain. she just snapped in that moment and it was a 2.5 year buildup of frustration that she just let loose bc she felt like she was being rejected and like all her fears of abandonment were being confirmed and she kinda just lost it. i don’t even think she fully gets why she did it tbh it kinda just happened and she ran with it and processed it all two hours later and was like “oh shit i’m going to pretend that won’t make me wanna die forever” but it’s also just a response to a constant pattern of Fucking Everything Up So Bad Now, Kiss And Make Up Later except oopsies it was fatal this time!!!

basically when the relationship is good it’s perfect and idealistic and amazing in every way and when it’s bad it’s the worst fucking relationship you’ve ever seen. it’s a mess they’re a mess it’s so fun!!

[schoenht]

GLADLY!! Some of the issues are like wayyyyy too deep for me to even begin with and are years old but we can just talk about the wedding.

1- my cousins step sister showed up in a wedding dress to the ceremony but was kicked out by security before she could enter.

2- And the vows were just… not it. The premise of both of their vows were “I made such a good choice by choosing you and you’re so grateful that I settled for you.”

3- OHOHOH WAIT the best man was the brides ex, she was cheating on him with the groom!!!

4- The bride and groom kept dancing with other people all night, but not even in like the normal way but like in a wayyyyyyyy too touchy way. The big no-no toughest if you will.

5- The bride apparently smashed a slice of cake on the grooms cheek so he literally chased her and pinned her on the ground and smashed way more slices on her face/ upper dress and called her a b-word a few times too. I say apparently because I wasn’t in the room. And they were VERY strict about no phones out.

6- Going off of no phones I think saw the groom on tinder while everyone was getting their makeup done before the wedding!!

7- Isnt fully related but like 6 people got into a fight. Idk what that was about. I think of those people was the grooms mom though!!

8- The bride and groom kept being narcissistic the whole time which was fun. I think?

Those are all the main events I can remember at the moment, so sorry if it seems kinda short but it was…something. That’s a word to use.

-🌺

...holy fuck. hang on, the tea is HOTTER THAN THE SUN let me just. Tell you my reactions to each one but overall, my jaw dropped and kept DROPPING with each entry

One, SHE SHOWED UP IN A FUCKING WEDDING DRESS ??? AN ENTIRE WEDDING DRESS ???? WHAT. WHAT. THE LEVEL OF INSANITY SHE HAS, I'M SORRY. Two, i. If there is anything i have learned, NEVER. SETTLE. stay single before you settle fuck no what kinda bullshit vows were those omfg. Three, DOES THE GROOM HAVE A BRAINCELL ??? I. DOES HE KNOW SHE WAS CHEATING WITH HIM ??? that is so messy omg I've seen wattpad aus less messy than that

Four, yikes. Five, WHAT THE FUCK. THAT'S YOUR WIFE AND YOU'RE CALLING HER THAT AND DOING THAT TO HER ??? annulment !! Immediately !!! Six, I'm sorry but if he was on tinder before the wedding, that marriage is not lasting, i gotta say it. Seven, i honestly think this was the sanest entry, POSSIBLY bc i am so used to fights at big events (staring at my graduation). Eight, if there is one thing my mom taught me, it's that you cannot be narcissistic at an event YOU planned bc if you really wanted it to be abt you, you wouldn't have invited other people (this happened after my aunt said smth at my cousin's quince that did not sit right with me)

Lowkey. That sounds extremely draining but the car ride back must've either been quiet or gone "OKAY BUT DID YOU SEE--"

[b0rtney]

so the things u gotta know is that im gay and i love homemade hot chocolate, like from a square of unsweetened chocolate and some milk and a spoon of sugar kinda homemade. makes a great, protein-rich breakfast for my autistic ass. let me set the scene. i missed my birthday this year because my dead aunt is haunting our asses and it created a mold problem so bad we had to evacuate our house three days before my birthday because the contractor opened up the wall with no real thought for how mold works. so on my birthday i was in a tent, and then about a week into tent living i said fuck this im going to stay with my older sibling in iowa because i really appreciate things like four walls and a kitchen. so i get there, and when my sibling learns i never got a birthday cake they are determined to fix that, bc theyre a sweetie, and hands me a booklet of cupcake recipes and asks me to pick one, so i pick a smores-kinda-guy and they go into the kitchen while i try to work on a timeloop fanfiction for the hobbit.

just as im getting frustrated (audibly, talking to my siblings partner and roommate abt it as they play baldurs gate) abt not rembering the last 15 minutes of an unexpected journey my sibling comes back in like 'bad news gang, we need unsweetened chocolate for this recipe. someone gotta run to the store' and i just throw up my hands and say my catchphrase: thats it! im ggoing fishing! and exit the home and go to my car.

i then return with the hobbit: an unexpected journey on dvd and a tupperware full of unsweetened chocolate squares. the room is understandably shocked that i have a solution to both problems on hand and in my car. and i was very pleased to inform them "i always keep that mfing strap on me. and by mfing strap i mean the extended collectors edition dvd collection of the hobbit trilogy by peter jackson complete with art and maps and the 3 bonus discs per movie, and unsweetened chocolate.

also a vibrator, but thats bc i believe its a human right to be fucked well at least once, and i have that skill and am ready to use it at any time.

[thecubes]

Fav Randall and Hopkirk headcanons GO

HELOO randall and hopkirk anons my beloved. polite kiss for you on the cheek. ive talked abt r&h hcs a bunch on and off so i Apologize if im repeating myself hahahgdks

cut bc its so long LOL

ive deffo talked abt this 1 before but 1 of my big hcs is that marty doesnt drink alcohol! my reasoning varies slightly depending on my mood lol but mainly just bc he doesnt like the culture and hates feeling out of control. he can be coaxed into a single drink tho if hes just hanging out with jeff. my back up for this is in the ghost talks when alive marty asks for a tomato juice (as opposed to the expected scotch) and the man he is with looks at him like he grew two heads. then also just *gestures vaguely at all of when the spirit moves you* this hc also leads into my crackship of calvin p bream x marty lolllll

um i dont thinkkk? ive mentioned this 1 before but my 2nd other hc is that jeff was raised by his grandparents (or smtimes just grandma depends on my mood lol). theres no canonical basis to this other than to me he seems super old fashioned (obvs the whole show is to us but even for Then he just seems......old to me idk). i think that he got his short temper and cynical side from her :")

bonus hc leading on from the last , i also think that both jeff and marty are disconnected from their families in some way. jeff bc his family are never mentioned at all, and martys family seem to... not be involved in his life? the gathering at his funeral was very small, and his auntie turned up almost a year since his funeral (i...think, the r&h timeline is inconsistent) found out from jeannie (who took a while to even recall the aunt) that he died, then preceeded to barely give a crap ??!! if anything it was a mild incovenience to her. not sure that would be my reaction to finding out an otherwise healthy young nephew died in a freak road accident but hey.

i think that jeff marty and jeannie are extremely close knit in an almost found family sort of way (and i know this is in part due to itc focusing more on individual episode stories than overarching plot/backstory) but in terms of canon i choose to believe their families each had something against them living their lives the way they want to. maybe jeffs folks didnt like him not settling down with somebody, jeannies for marrying somebody so soon (we dont know this but thats the best reason i can come up with lol), and martys because he spent almost all of his time with jeff (a bad influence). i just get this feeling that they have been rejected by others and depend on each other a lot! or i am just projecting hehe

anywayyy hope u enjoyed bye i love u mwah

[disneyanddisneyships]

@gyubby99 here's my trauma recap

May be triggering so.....

Once upon a time~

My parents divorced when I was 3.

So I ssit h houses a lot which is really taxing because you have two homes but your parents wants you to consider their house your real home.

Anyways, along the time in there my aunt stays with me, my mom, and my sister for a bit. She's off her mess so she trips, falls and cracks her head open in the bathroom while 3 year old me is staring at the blood. (I don't remember this tho. Hence the thing I said abt forgetting trauma because it was too traumatic)

Don't remember anything until I'm in elementary school.

So at 8 years old I got made fun of and bullied a lot.

It's when my depression kicked in.

Got made fun of for my eyebrows, my curly hair, my laugh, and my weight.

Then my older sister moves out and never really talks to me again.

At the elementary school I'm at, my then best friend starts to constantly Dutch and abandon abandon for this other girl.

I begged my mom to move schools.

Then I finally moved elementary schools.

Everything was so great at the new one..... I made friends.... one by the name of Christian.....

I had two best friends, and a crush on this guy who was also a teachers kid like me.

One day, my two best friends don't wanna play what I want, but I already had social anxiety at the age of 9 so I didn't wanna fo anything new. They were fine with that so I turned around to get the stuff we usually do, I turn back and they ditched me... instant flashbacks to the other school.

We're friends again yadda yadda.

Elementary school ends.... I go to middle school....

One of the best friends in as talking about has a twin sister...

Her twin sister hated me for some unknown reason.... all she did was be mean to me.... my teachers were awful (except for my art teacher)... then my best friend and her sister moved to a different school....

I made new friends.. and oh hey, my old friend Chris is there. He does the weird "Yes, No, maybe" thing to qn eraser and asks it if we'd ever be in a relationship. Lmao. It said yes.

The year passes. Chris moved schools.

I had friends that were bad for my mental health. I started self harming.

But it's okay because I had 4 amazing best friends and a few other good friends.

This is when I get my first boyfriend.

He was okay.... I guess... I had art class with him and at the 8th grade dance he said he liked me and asked me to be his girlfriend. I said yes.

But over the summer he ghosted me and my mom had to tell me to give up....

Freshman year of high school.

My dad gets a girlfriend and we all go up to see my grandparents in which my grandma and my dad's girlfriend were teasing me for having a fictional crush. It made me angry

I text the group chat with 3 of my best friends because I need a stress reliever.

My best friend just says "no" to the meme. Doesn't read it, doesn't care.

I blow up because I'm sick of disrespect. "I look at every single meme you guys send. I'm sick of you," is what I said.

My best friend blocks me.

I text my other friends trying to get her to unblock me so I can apologize. She unblocks me, I apologize. She doesn't accept it, calls me selfish and says "and you've lost 2 friends because this person doesn't like you either". I confront the other friend and she calls me manipulative, so I block her.

Me and the other friend didn't stay good friends for long (but they're cool now. We're in the same chour class. They have a Tumblr that I follow)

Um.... then I get closer with other people. Specifically my now former friends.... and.... my other friends ex....

I got so desperate to be loved that me and him started dating.

It was a secret and I didn't tell my mom....

Until she found out by looking at the bill of my phone....

Then she found out I had been self harming.... that was.. traumatic all on its own.

Anyways. Covid hit, and.. he moved schools for sophomore year..... over text we sexted a lot.... I was... desperate for some form of love....

But when I tried with boundaries... it.... I felt bad because when I said I didn't want to, I thought he'd hate me.. I thought hed leave me.....

I didn't even know what was happening was considered assault at the time...

The thing that really stuck with me was when he took his (small) dick out and brought my hand to it. I pulled away but he just grabbed my hand again and made me touch him....

Anyways um....

Later on he starts ghosting me.... a lot..... then one day after not hearing from him for 2 weeks he questions our relationship...

We breakup after 2 years... and we break up right before i go to Disneyland with my family.

He wanted to still be friends but I said i needed time.

I have a breakdown in the hotel at Disney.

And after about a week he texts me and asks if we can still be friends, I say no.

He starts trying to manipulate me. Calls me a bitch. I block him.

I get back from the vacation and I have two friends supporting me. Christian and my other unnamed friend.

I find out Chris likes me and had a crush on me in middle school...... he asks me out but I say no because I just got out of a negative relationship.. so I gave myself the entire summer to lull that over..

Then he asks me out again when senior year starts and I say yes.

He helps me realize that my ex assaulted me.... he also told the counselor by "accident" and I had to tell my parents....

Things go fine... but....

8 months later Chris starts to get flaky. He ghosts me for a while at a time (nowhere near the other guy though)

Until I find out that he told the counselor i was suicidal, and then he broke up with me.

And here we are.