#i went back to check to make sure bcs it felt a lot longer in my memory

[acosmicbee]

A suggestion because I think you could do it well

How about…

1. A caregiver android that took care of you as a kid but now you’re getting ready to go to college and move into your new apartment, and you come across them in the basement and decide to take them with you for old times sake. They can clean and cook and… baby you? Huh?

2. The 3rd chapter of the hot streamer milf with the kid actually trying to bond with and get comfortable with her. Maybe they finally have a conversation bc the kid doesn’t want to be stuck in a cabin for the rest of their life but the mom tells them that they don’t want that either, it’s just for now.

3. A sickly and neglected noble child ignored by parents gets a new governess

New Teacher

Thanks so much for the ideas! Number 3 was speaking to me so here we go!

You hated being stuck inside all the time. Any time you had the strength to, you'd sneak from your room and make your way to the gardens. It gave the maids and butlers a heart attack every time they went to check on you and your room was empty.

The fresh air made you feel a little better. You would walk, barefoot, in the dewy grass, letting the wind blow through your hair. Sometimes you'd sit in the gazebo out back and watch the little stream flow by. Sometimes you'd lie on the grass by the pond the stream fed into, watching the ducks swim.

You had no responsibilities, unlike your siblings. Then again, most days you could barely get out of bed. You'd be fevered and sweaty and the family doctor would have to come by again to feed you medicine.

You were left alone a lot, which was a little depressing. Your parents wouldn't visit and you only saw them on your better days when you could join the family for a meal. Your siblings would sometimes stop by to bring you a gift from their travels or read you a book. But most of the time, it was just you and your bed and the maids and butlers.

It was another bad day. You were curled up in your bed, feverish and sweaty. You felt cold, curled under your blankets, but you knew you were burning up from the constant cool towel being placed on your forehead. You'd been sickly for so long that your care was routine now and no longer came with panic and fear.

The maids and butlers had long since learned that notifying your parents every time you found yourself on bedrest again did nothing. They wouldn't visit you, citing more important duties as duke and duchess that needed their attention.

It was normal for the new maids to be sent to attend to you during your sick periods, that way they could learn quickly how to help you. It was why you didn't question waking up to an unfamiliar face. A woman was gently shushing you as she moved you over to a plush chair by the fireplace.

You shut your eyes for a second, realizing the maids were changing your bedspread to a clean one. Hands that felt blissfully cold also helped change you into a clean pair of pajamas before you were placed back into soft sheets. The same woman was there at your bedside, quickly replacing the cool cloth on your forehead and gently running a hand through your hair as you drifted off again.

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It was morning this time, you vaguely noted as you woke up again. Clearly hours had past while you slept, something common when you were feverish. Your fever had broken at some point and, while you still didn't feel amazing, you felt better than you had been.

Sitting at your bedside was a woman you didn't recognize, which was a little strange. She was reading a book, her blonde hair up in a braided bun, and she wasn't wearing a maid uniform. When she did eventually glance up at you she instantly smiled seeing you awake, shutting her book and placing it to the side.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Y/N! I am Roxanne, your governess." She cheerfully introduced herself. She seemed to study you for a second, her gaze never wavering. "You know, for someone never formally introduced to high society, you sure are quite the rumor. People have all sorts of crazy things to say about your existence and why you never accompany your parents and siblings to balls."

"It's because I'm sick a lot." You murmured, trying to sit up. Your whole body was sore and it took Roxanne propping you up against some pillows for you to stay upright. "Do people really talk about me? I'm surprised people know I exist at all..."

Roxanne's smile faltered for a second at your words, a near invisible crease forming on her forehead only to be immediately fixed. "Of course they know about you, silly. Although, some people don't think you exist at all. Lack of knowledge makes some people turn to strange answers to try and gain understanding."

A maid entered the room with a tray with some tea and medicine on it. It was only the newest attempt at curing you in a long line of failed pills and tonics. At least it mostly made you drowsy, some of the others had only worsened your condition until they wore off.

Once you'd taken the pill, washing it down with some honey sweetened tea, you were left alone again with Roxanne. When the sleepiness kicked in she helped you lay back down with a smile as she opened her book again.

"The first king of Berina was named Owen Lyonel Alexander IV. He established the kingdom when the land was still open fields and forests. As the kingdom grew he ruled with a fair hand, helping those in need and punishing those who disobeyed his laws." She read to you. She continued reading to you from the book until you eventually fell asleep again.

ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ💊ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ

"Y/N! For goodness sake let me know when you want to go outside! I practically had a heart attack when I saw your bed empty!" Roxanne scolded. You felt a little bad, but it was such a lovely day out and the fresh air helped you feel better. Besides, you thought after the months she'd been here that she would have learned by now that you were usually outside when not in bed.

You were lying in the grass, watching the ducks swim across the pond. The sun was warm, and you found some coverage under the shade of a large oak tree. The breeze was calm and soothingly cool. But you knew that if you'd asked someone they wouldn't have let you outside.

Not just because of your condition either. There'd been tension and whispers among the staff about some kind of unrest among the peasantry. Even the fenced off grounds were seen as 'too dangerous' for you to be in. But you weren't sure when the next time you'd be well enough to go out was so you snuck out anyway.

Roxanne sat down next to you, a book held close to her chest. She always seemed to have a book with her, but maybe that was just because she was a governess. "Either way, it's time for your lessons. I suppose it's fine for us to do our reading out here today as long as we head back inside before dusk."

You cuddled up to her, resting your head in her lap as she read. She was one of the only constant sources of comfort in your life. The only figure you would associate as motherly. There had always been a revolving door when it came to maids and butlers, people constantly quitting just to be replaced with someone else. But Roxanne seemed to always be there.

She would help you on your worst days, losing sleep to keep watch at your bedside. On your best days she'd join you in the garden, like she was doing today. She never neglected you when you wanted her, even when it was for something silly. You were too stubborn to admit it but almost anyone could see how you looked up to her.

"...for there, emerging from the crowd, came a man. He was large with a tricorn hat adorning his head, a feather tucked in it's brim. His voice was deep and cruel and... Y/N, are you even listening?" Roxanne asked, frowning down at you. You nodded, not wanting to have been caught zoning out. She just fondly sighed, ruffling your hair. "Mind grounded, sweetheart. Now, lets start over again so I can make sure you got it."

Laying there, listening to nature mixed with Roxanne's voice, everything felt perfect. But that perfection was about to start to shatter around you.

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"An entire duchy up in flames! Barely anything but ashes left once they got the fire out!" One maid whispered, anxiety lacing her voice.

"It wasn't the entire duchy, just the rich areas." A butler corrected. "When the mob first surrounded the duke's manor, they ordered for all the servants to leave. Then they burned it down."

You were crouched next to your bedroom door, your ear up to the slight crack between it and the floor. It was late, far past when you should've been asleep. Perhaps that was why a few maids and butlers had felt safe enough to have such a risky conversation.

"Well at least if the mob we get is similar, we'll be safe." A different maid said, scoffing a little. "You really think with the way the Duke and Duchess run this place they don't have people who hate them? Trust me, this place is probably next."

"Poor Y/N. Its not like their parents even spend time with them and now they've been doomed to die just by association." The butler said, sounding a little sorry for you. "Who knows? Maybe their sickness will kill them before the fire can."

"This conversation is wholly inappropriate!" Roxanne suddenly said out in the hallway. You could hear the anger in her voice. "Y/N will be fine. Everything will be fine. Now get back to work before I report anything I heard."

There was a scuffle as the three rushed off and you took that opportunity to dart back to your bed. You had just barely curled up under the blankets and closed your eyes when Roxanne slipped into your room.

She sat on the bed beside you, placing a hand on your forehead to check your temperature. Eventually she started gently carding her fingers through your hair. "Everything is fine. I'll keep you safe. Just... Just a little bit longer, okay? We're almost there..."

It sounded more like she was talking to herself than to you. Your mind was too busy spinning with the conversation you'd heard to process her slightly cryptic words. By the time you finally fell asleep she was still beside you, lost in thought as her fingers brushed through your hair.

ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ💊ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ

It happened at the worst possible time. It was late when you'd heard the panic that the manor was surrounded. You were once again bedridden with a fever, unable to do anything. You could hardly process what was going on around you.

Roxanne had carried you to her room as she packed her clothing. The order had already been given for all servants to leave the manor within an hour or face death for their loyalty. She'd wrapped you up in a blanket, and the second she finished packing you were cradled against her chest.

The few servants that seemed to notice what she was doing were more concerned with themselves and their families to care. She had her head held high as she pulled her trunk along with one hand, holding you with the other. When you finally made it to the gates and were stopped she was already prepared.

"My name is Roxanne Ardeca. I'm a maid for the duke and duchess." There was a murmur from the one questioning her to a different man. "My child is sick right now so apologies for shielding their face. All the smoke would only make them worse."

"Ardeca isn't a noble name." The man confirmed, only sparing your covered form a cursory glance. "You may proceed."

She shushed you when you let out a small whine, watching as the next servant in line was questioned. "You're alright Y/N. Shh, just rest. When we get to the carriage I'll make sure to have a cool towel prepared for you."

Your mind couldn't process the fact that there was no way Roxanne should have a carriage already waiting. Or that a lady of her standing shouldn't have the means to afford a private carriage. All you could do, as the fever pulled you back under, was watch as she walked away from your home. Watch as the people finally advanced and the manor went up in flames.

ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ💊ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ

"Roxanne." She scoffed as she finally stepped out of her carriage. Your fever had gone down a little, but not by much. She wasn't in the mood to deal with a prince right now and especially not this one.

"What do you want Hayden? I have a child to tend to." She said a little snappily. She effortlessly climbed from the carriage, a few maids and butlers grabbing her luggage and leading the horses away.

"Nothing, just wanted to congratulate you. You always do such fine work. Now that the entire country of Osentia is turning against their nobility Berina will finally be able to expand." He said with a grin, following her towards her manor. "Although, it does intrigue me that you seemed to find a little present for yourself while gathering intel."

She turned to him with a fierce glare. "If you even think about laying a hand on them I will kill you, prince or not."

Hayden grinned, a feral expression as he followed her to her door. A butler was already opening it for her as she stormed inside. "That's why I made you head of the royal guard. You have this fire inside of you."

"Is that why you send me away so much? Scared I'll burn down your castle too?" She asked, her expression softening when you stirred a little in her arms. She cooed at you, gently repositioning you to be more supported.

"I sent you to gather information because people tend to underestimate you. Finding yourself someone to fight for was just an added benefit. Either way, I'll let you retire for the night. I'll even prepare a gift for the new baby." He teased, stepping away. "Good night, Roxanne, Head of the Royal Guard of Berina."

The use of her full title just annoyed her more as she carried you to a bedroom beside her own. She carefully set you down, smiling when you tried to grip onto her. "Don't you worry honey, momma is right here. Momma isn't going anywhere."

By the time you recovered from your fever, your whole life would have changed. A new house, new country, new maids and butlers, a new garden to explore. The only constant, it seemed, was Roxanne. Only she had changed too, hadn't she? She wasn't just Roxanne, your governess, anymore. Now? She was Roxanne, your mother and head of the royal guard of Berina, and she was never letting you go.

[comesatimecomesashadow]

broken machine *ೃ༄

pairing *ೃ༄ simon 'ghost' riley / gn reader

fic type *ೃ༄ depression comfort, oneshot

cw *ೃ༄ detailed descriptions of severe depression (specifically lethargy & low motivation), detailed scene in which the reader disassociates, one instance in which the reader looks at a knife for too long (there is no mention/description of self harm though), reader is described to have curly hair, nudity (non-sexual).

summary *ೃ༄ when the days bleed into one another and your will to live runs dry, simon is there to comfort you.

note *ೃ༄ i've seen a lot of these ghost depression comfort fics where he comes home to a vv messy house bcs reader's too tired to do it and while that is a valid representation of depression, i wanted to write one in which the reader fights through their depression to keep the house clean since ik there are a lot of us who can't just lay in bed all day (like we want to) when we're depressed. Anyway, i hope this is of some comfort to someone out there.

masterlist *ೃ༄

   The day began as normal — well, as normal as you could make it. 

   It was cloudy and drab outside but it still somehow brought you a sense of solace. Grabbing your phone to check the time, still under the warm covers of your bed, you realized that you’d slept in again; It was around ten in the morning. Your limbs felt like lead and you cursed how heavy and lethargic you felt despite knowing the fact that it was all caused by your mental state. 

   Over the years, you’d found that these episodes would come around at unexpected times and ever since you decided that medication would not help, these episodes just came and went — some stayed longer than others. This one was one of the longer ones, it was lasting about three weeks now. During the moments where you felt more energetic (which was rare), the beds would be made and surfaces would be dusted. 

   You fought through your lethargy and the desire to just sleep the entire day to keep the place clean for when Simon would come home — that, and the fact that being in a clean environment helped you feel good about yourself at least a little despite the constant weight of depression on your back. 

   There were times where you’d go weeks without cleaning and when it got too messy for your liking, you’d pull up your gloves and get to work. Simon was already working hard and the least you could do was keep the place clean until he came back home, that’s what you told yourself. So, without further contemplation, you begrudgingly exposed yourself to the biting London air and got ready for the day. 

   As soon as you got to the bathroom, you considered a shower. But after eying it for some time you resigned to just splash water on your face and brush your teeth. Showering felt like a burden you couldn’t take care of right now. Right now, you had to get this place looking decent at the very least. 

   You hummed the lyrics to a song that's been stuck in your head for a while as you washed the dirty dishes in the sink, slowly scrubbing off the hardened leftover food off of them. Truthfully, you hadn’t really eaten a proper meal in a while, just noodles. In times like these, you couldn’t stomach much. But even then, it wasn’t as if you even had the energy to get up and make a proper meal for yourself. 

   Once the dishes were done, you leaned against the counter and closed your eyes. 

   The air was still cold and the flat couldn’t be more silent. The flat always felt colder and more still when Simon was gone. With your vision gone fuzzy, you were sure that you were looking at the window in the living room, across from the kitchen. Though now it looked less like a window and more like a fluffy cloud of white and grey. It was as if your eyes were unfocused camera lenses. 

   You weren’t sure how long you’d stared out into nothing, but as soon as you snapped back, you rubbed your eyes and continued on with your duties.

   Your eyes lingered on the knife holder for a bit longer than normal before you exited the kitchen. 

   With the floors swept and mopped, the counters wiped and clean, you looked over at the mountainous laundry basket in the closet. You’d been putting it off for a while but you sighed when you realized that you were running out of clothes.. You couldn’t procrastinate doing it any longer. You moved the basket out from the closet and into the room before you began separating them; jeans by themselves, socks and underwear together, darker clothes were separated from the lighter colors and soon enough it was all ready to be washed. 

   You started with jeans and after about an hour and a half, all that was needed was for the lighter colors to dry up. You sat at the couch watching a sitcom that you weren’t really paying attention to while you waited for the clothes to dry and after a while, you found yourself asleep on the couch. 

.

.

.

   You weren’t exactly sure how much time had passed between then and now but it didn’t make any difference to how you got up. Simon wasn’t home yet. You pulled yourself out from the comfortable couch, your skin warm from the contact. The lacquered floorboards beneath your feet were a striking cold contrast to the warmth you felt just minutes ago. 

   Nonetheless you continued on to the dryer and took out the clothes. Little warmth lingered on them since they’d been dry for a while now. Taking armfuls of the semi-warm clothes, you set them on the king-sized bed you’d longed to sleep on for a while now and began to fold them. You weren’t energized from your nap, in fact you felt more tired than ever — but your motivation to finish this first was overwhelming your desire to succumb to slumber. 

   You folded the pants and separated the shirts, separated the socks, the underwear and tucked everything into their respective drawers. Now, with a decently cleaned home and the laundry done, you allowed yourself to collapse on your bed. Your stomach felt empty, had you eaten anything since you’d woken up? 

   With a sigh, you carried yourself into the kitchen to pour yourself a glass of water. It would have to suffice since the arms of your tiredness stuck to you like caramel. After finishing the glass, you swiftly went back to your beloved mattress and let your body sink into it until your aching muscles and tired bones mixed with the softness of the bed. 

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ 

   The following day, you were woken up. Not by the usual cloudy day nor the cold London air, but by the familiar warmth of none other than your husband. Simon’s arms engulfed you like the blanket you had around you. His arms were placed lazily around your waist but as soon as you tried to move to get a better look at him, he tightened his hold on you. “Si,” you whispered. 

   You whispered his name a total of two other times afterwards and yet all you got in response was a tired grunt. You sighed and rolled around, your eyes gazing at his tired visage. Your fingers curled into his hair which was longer than you last remembered. It set in that he was next to you, that he was here and it suddenly felt like a dam broke loose inside you. 

   Simon didn’t deserve this- you. 

   He didn’t deserve to feel concerned over you crying into his neck as you hugged him close. He didn’t deserve to be stuck with someone as high-maintenance as you. Why should he be forced to carry your burdens after all the hard work he had to do in the field? If anything, you should be the one giving him solace, not the other way around. 

   Nonetheless, Simon cradled your head in his chest and stroked your back lazily. He didn’t ask questions about your crying, only cooed at you, telling you to breathe and that it’d be alright. “M’sorry,” you apologized after untangling yourself from him and wiping your tears that didn’t seem to stop. It had felt like you were just now tuning into reality after being on autopilot for about three weeks straight. These burdens weren’t his to carry and you hated that after months of him being gone, this was your greeting to him.

   “Don’t apologize,” he was sitting up now, bringing you close to him as if to remind you that you didn’t have to feel guilty about your tears or about your damaged state of mind. He held you like fragile glass, as if you’d break if he moved. Your arms slowly reached up to return his warm embrace. 

   “I’m not..” the words poured out of you with a shakiness. The earthquake inside you wouldn’t allow you to speak clearly. “I’m not okay.” Tears spilled and your fists collected the fabric of his shirt into them. It was hard for you to admit it, you were sure that dealing with these episodes by yourself was fine because you’d done it before. That it wasn’t anything you couldn’t handle. 

   But that didn’t stop you from feeling as if the weight of a thousand worries had just crashed down on you. 

   “You will be.” he spoke with a certainty that left no room for doubt. Simon didn’t move and kept quietly rubbing your back as if to soothe you. And it did. Your weary eyes ran dry after a couple minutes of his comforting hold on you. Once he was sure that you were done, the blond separated from you a little and brought his calloused hand up to your cheek, wiping the residue of your salty tears on your cheeks. You avoided his gaze still, you weren’t ready to face him after all of that. 

   After years of being with you, Simon had grown to be an expert on how to comfort you during these episodes of yours. He didn’t consider them a burden but he understood that you felt as if they were. To him, you weren’t damaged goods. You weren’t weighing him down, nor were you an inconvenience. 

   To him, you were just human. 

.

.

.

   In the ten minutes that had passed, you found yourself in a bathtub surrounded by soapy warm water. The water relaxed the deepest parts of your muscles and you felt as if you’d melt with the way Simon was carefully combing through your curls. Your hair becomes increasingly difficult to take care of during times like this mostly because of the amount of time it requires. It was full of knots and tangles and to get through them, you’d have to section the hair, detangle every section and then on top of that there was the shampooing and the conditioning and .. it was just a huge problem you didn’t feel like you could handle with the low motivation you were plagued with. 

   But Simon could care less. 

   He took your hair pick and sectioned off your hair with extreme precision and loving care. His big and calloused hands took their time combing through the various tangled spots, from the tips of your hair to their roots, just like how you’d do it. Through it all, you hummed a familiar tune to yourself, trying to soothe the guilt you felt for making him do all this for you.

   This wasn’t the first time he had done this for you and it certainly wouldn't be the last. His endearing actions often felt like something you were far from deserving. Simon quietly finished the last section up and rinsed the detangling cream out of your hair. He reached for the hydrating hibiscus hair mask you used, the aroma filling your nose in a comforting fashion. It felt like it had been ages since you last smelled something so pleasant. 

   Simon quietly lathered your hair in it, making sure every strand was coated in the hair mask. “You don’t have to do this.. I’m sorry for-” 

   He grunted, “I want to.” Simon wished you’d stop apologizing but he knew that telling you to stop would be futile. “Let me do this for you, yeah?” 

   With a reluctant sigh, you nodded and brought your knees close to your chest. After about an hour, he was done doing your hair care. He offered to wash your body for you but you refused, saying that you could at least save him the trouble of doing so — to which he then took the washcloth from you and scrubbed every inch of you, as softly as he possibly could of course. 

   “S’this the one you use, Love?” Simon held up a container half-full of the styling cream you used, though it looked much smaller in his hands. 

   “Yeah,” you replied softly, “That’s the one.” 

   Simon Riley rarely ever smiles, but in the rare times that he allowed you to see one — even the ghost of one — it felt like seeing the sun after a long and cloudy day. A sort of solace that was experienced very rarely but it made you happy when you did get to experience it. You let him section off your hair once more, this time with a little more conversation. He asked you about your days while he was gone and you answered with tellings of the mundane happenings at work, the drama in between your coworkers and how your boss was getting on your nerves more often than not. Simon, very subtly, managed to distract you from the darkness that plagued your thoughts. He redirected your thoughts to the present moment — the good moments. 

   The blond meticulously curled his fingers around each individual strand of your hair like you would have done. Perhaps his military precision was the cause of the perfect way he shaped your curls for you. After which, Simon helped you diffuse them until your whole head of hair was without a single drop of water. It had made you laugh how he asked for your instruction on how to do it since you never thought you’d be the one ordering him around like that. 

   “Smells nice.” you said after inspecting your hair and taking a whiff at the pleasant scent of it. You forgot how pretty having your natural hair all done up made you feel. Whilst you were getting dressed in your shared room, Simon was in the kitchen cooking up something that smelled delicious. The tangy scent of meat wafted throughout the flat, it made you remember just how much you’d missed having a proper meal instead of the noodles you’ve been stuffing yourself with these past few weeks. 

   The floorboards still felt icy underneath your bare feet, but your heart was enough to warm the fullness of your body. You walked up behind Simon and softly wrapped your arms around his torso. You could feel it as he tensed up and quickly relaxed under your tender hold. “Thank you.” It was a quiet sentence of gratitude, but he could feel the weight of your words. 

   You meant it. 

   He knew you meant it. 

   Simon tended to the cooking steak in front of him, the buttery scent wafting into both of your noses and surrounding the lot of you in the warmth of the fire on the stove. He brought a hand atop yours which rested on his stomach and lovingly rubbed his thumb along the skin of your wrist. His fingers were always calloused but they never lacked the warmth you sought during times like these. 

   Despite how hard it felt to just exist for a day, Simon always knew how to make you feel okay. He wasn’t your saviour of any kind, but he was your protector. 

   And he’d protect your heart as long as you’d allow him to. 

[scentedpepper]

Cinderellas Slipper

BILLY HARGROVE X MALE READER

Summary: Billy tries to apologize but loses his slipper instead.

Content Warnings: "Queer" used in a derogatory manner. Brief mention of Billy and Reader having sexual relations. Established Relationships/Lore

Other Pairing(s): Steve Harrington x Male Reader, Jonathan Byers x Male Reader, Will Byers x Male Reader, Nancy Wheeler x Billy Hargrove (implied not said)

AUTHOR NOTE(S):

Writing specific scenes that pop into my head is much easier than committing to an entire fanfic :p

Feeling kinda meh abt this one guys idddkkkk

Uhhhhh Billy is gay bc I say so

No but that headcanon really gets my writer loins spinnin

The depth

Anyway

Billy's a wee bit jealous

👍

_________________________________________

Billy's not sure what lead him to this point.

But the moment he steps out of his Camaro he has to pause, place his hands on his hips, and pace. Once. Twice. Three times for good measure before his attention is redirected to his destination.

Depot Central.

"Hawkins for the Family" Or so the sign outside had stated.

It's 4:30 in the afternoon, you've only been on shift for 30 minutes.

Three and a half hours to go.

Billy has memorized your schedule like the back of his hand.

The depot wasn't small by any means, but most of its stores closed at the latest of six due to its small town status. The depot itself mainly used the second story to hoard it's products, what couldn't fit through the windows displayed itself like an open antique shop on the 1st floor, the remaining area that couldn't be utilized by the display lay store merchandise.

This was the third time in a row he'd come back to the depot.

The first time he'd be stepping inside.

If the place had more customers he would've stalled a little longer, maybe considered another 3 rounds of pacing the parking lot but there was no one in front of him when he stood off to the side, peering through the windows.

His hands find his hips again, pressing agaisnt the brown leather belt adorning his dark blue jeans. It was new. He'd went out and bought it a few days ago. Even went as far as hiding between the aisles of the women's section trying to scope out style.

He didn't buy the pink or purple belt, regardless of how "nice" you said those colors were on him. Instead, by a random struck of luck that felt unwarranted, he'd found one even more perfect. One in which the gems were arranged in a way that made it look like the night sky.

Fucking space because you were into that shit or whatever.

Gemstones on top of silver. And Billy felt like a star on the belt, big and prominent.

Maybe that was wishful thinking. He couldn't really reject the feeling of suffocating when the gems shined in the sunlight through the window panes beside him.

Girly.

Feminine.

Queer.

Billy tries to ignore them and in the process, he considers ditching his clothing choices for today and giving in to his original idea. But even so, with all he's been through, Billy isn't really aware that the things he's learned from you have stuck this long.

He'd scrubbed himself raw in the bathroom just 30 minutes ago. And he made sure to perfectly place the top portion of his maroon button up that was peeled open. And he dabbed cologne on every inch of his body, just in case the amount he had initially put on wasn't enough. And while he was driving he made sure to keep the cigarettes in his dash because he knew the smell, reminiscent of your father, was the sole reason you had never picked them up throughout your teenager years. Not even to just try.

So once more, everything right down to his clean socks were an item of scrutiny. He even had spare deodorant in his car if he started to sweat.

And for what? He didn't fucking know.

The urge to repeat his pacing however came and he knew very well what that meant.

He was thinking about turning around.

But to make sure his body isn't going the opposite direction, he checks his front pockets where two cards were securely nestled in.

Dare Billy say he was almost scared.

He feels sweat starting to prick on the back of his neck, underneath his perfectly defined curls –he didn't even want to think about the measures he went to learn how to make them look so pretty– and he ducks back into his car, deciding he should just put the deodorant everywhere.

As he fumbles for the anti perspirant in his dash, feet sticking out of the car and body pressing against the middle console awkwardly, he realizes that he's almost forgotten the singular rose that he specifically taped to head of his passenger seat so he wouldn't forget it.

Quickly, Billy retrieves the rose and proceeds to rub himself down with the light spray of deodorant.

And despite his previous antsy nature, when he finally goes to walk to the entrance of the store, his face is the perfect mix between cool and ready. But his eyebrows are furrowed, a giveaway to the turmoil going on in his head.

Once the doors slide open, the chimes on top barely audible in the distance, Billy's face twitches ever so slightly when he realizes who is bent over the checkout counter, chatting you up, eliciting deep, rumbling laughter from your wide chest.

Steve.

Billy makes sure the displeasure is gone from his face with a blink of the eyes before he's approaching the two with nonchalant grace. He makes sure his gait is perfect and makes no noise against the flooring of the store, this way he can spy on your conversation from behind the taller shelves of canned food.

He listens close enough to pick up the murmurings of some new ice cream recipe you had apparently tried over the weekend with Will and Jonathan. Sounded absolutely disgusting to Billy. There was pecan and raspberry involved, as well as a hint of honey which would be fine if it wasn't inside frozen food.

But Billy found himself not really paying attention to the words being exchanged, moreso the tone.

Or, more importantly– how Steve said them. Emphasized certain vowels that he wouldn't unless he was in the presence of someone really close.

Just the thought tightens his grip on the small rose clasped tightly in between his fingers and he decides to finally make himself known by making a detour into the candy aisle beside the front desk, going over to get a pack of black liquorish and throwing the item down at the counter for you to ring up.

Your eyes fling up in startle, as though you hadn't noticed Billy at all until the very moment he slammed the unsavory candy on the counter, the plastic brushing a strand of Steve's hair on the way down.

Maybe it was a little bit of an overreaction, but he couldn't help it.

There were instances in which Billy acted purely upon instinct or impulse. Moments in which he let those feelings go to his head and not only let it manifest into words, sometimes that energy even moved his entire body without asking.

You had paused mid-sentence to take in the scene before you. How could you not?

Steve was dumbfounded. Not because the candy was an offense to his palate but because the intensity with which Billy pushed the packaged item towards you was a big one.

Steve moved away from the man looming over his shoulder, offended for his friend across the counter.

The first time Steve had walked in on you two, Billy wanted to kill him –almost killed him. Whatever he was about to retort would most likely have the same outcome.

Because it didn't matter how nicely Billy dressed or spoke to you, Steve could still see the shadow of Billy in his mind, a storm all his own lurking underneath flesh.

"We're still talking. " The brunette finally speaks up, motioning back and forth between himself and you.

Billy snorts and rolls his eyes, trying his hardest not to call the boy across from him something more obscene than asshole because he knows it would lose him any chance of speaking to you.

"You're a worker, right? " Billy plants his forearm on the counter, mocking Steve's pervious position.

"Work. " He spits.

You stare back at him pointedly, hands on your waist before you grab the item and run it across the scanner. A green light graces you skin and a beep fills the empty room.

"52 cents, sir. " You retort simply.

Sir.

Sir.

"Sir?" Billy reels, face controrting into disgust. The word burned all over, and surely the older boy in front of him knew how much that word would affect him. He must've known that it'd make Billy Hargrove piss his pants.

You did.

But nevertheless, Billy pulls his wallet out and drops a five on the counter, telling you to keep the rest.

The plastic covering of the candy crinkles under your fingers as you lift it from the counter, passing it back to the blonde.

Your fingers brush beneath the packaging and all air seems to whoosh out of Billy's lung in response.

You meets his eyes in the middle.

It's silent for a moment.

–Save for Steve who's munching on the same type of candy just off to the side.

The blonde blinks, once, twice. His brows raising again like they had in his car. Billy can feel it, and he fights the urge to pull his fingers away but he doesn't, both of your hands just dangling there for a minute longer.

"Mm!" Steve chokes suddenly, wincing right after as the liquorish becomes a glob in his mouth and his body jerks backwards in discomfort.

It breaks the moment but Billy has an easier time collecting himself than his competitor.

"Steve. " You exclaim and you make a move towards him, patting your friends back with exaggerated aggression.

"I'm okay. " He rasps. "I'm okay. " He raises his hands up in the air but his words deceive him as he starts another fit of coughing.

After a minute or so of more gagging and choking and violent beatings on the back, Steve finally manages to swallow, with a loud groan of course.

You manage a laugh at the boys struggle, masking the noise the bell atop the door makes when it flies open.

And when you turn back around, half a grin still on your face, you're met with emptiness.

That, and a singular rose haphazardly placed on the counter.

[outermaybanks]

Out of the Woods - ch. 13

a/n: kept putting off posting out of anxiety bc i was gone for so long but i miss them so i'm back

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JJ drove the boat up the water to the dock near his house. JJ had only let me to his house three times, he only brought me when he was absolutely sure Luke wouldn’t be there, and he wasn’t. But some of his beer was, JJ grabbed one while I went straight to his room, exhausted beyond belief.

I was almost asleep when JJ came into the room. “You sleepin’ bug?”

“Mmm.” I mustered out. I could hear footsteps coming closer, but couldn’t open my eyes. I felt JJ kiss my head, so I let out another small noise. Then, I felt the bed dip behind me, and JJ’s arm came across to hold my waist.

“Get some sleep, sweet girl,” JJ whispered.

I was about to fall asleep, maybe I already was.

“I love you, Juniper.”

When I woke up, this time, I was nestled in JJ’s arms, I must have turned in my sleep because now I was facing him. He looked so peaceful while he slept, like all the worries that haunted him during the day just melted away. I wished he could always look like this. I carefully lifted my hand to his face, rubbing his cheek with my thumb.

“Just can’t keep your hands off me, huh?” JJ mumbled, and I giggled. “We slept too long. We gotta try to find John B.” I said.

JJ groaned as he sat up, rubbing his eyes. He took some time to wake up, then we were back on the boat, heading back to the Chateau. 

When we got there, we found him waiting at the dock with Kie.

He looked defeated, hopeless. He told us he went back to check the gold, and Ward had gotten all of it. 

“Every bar.” John B repeated when Kie asked if he was sure. John B ripped off his cast, and Kie scolded him for it, before we all heard shouting that made us turn around. Pope was running full speed towards us.

“Guys! Oh- god- I ran all the way here.” Pope panted.

“How was the interview, Pope?” JJ asked.

“Don’t ask. JB- I’m sorry, dude, about everything.”

“I don’t have a lot of time and I have information that is tactically relevant. So, before my interview, my dad said he was going down to the private airstrip to cut palms for Cameron’s big plane. Because it was too heavy, it needed a longer landing strip to take off. So, I’m there sitting in my interview, thinking to myself, ‘Hm. Why would Cameron need a longer airstrip to take off? What could be so heavy to weigh it down?’”

“Gold.” JJ answered.

“Exactly! Guys, this is our chance, but it leaves tonight, and we have to go.” Pope finished.

“Guys, we can’t give up now.” Kie said.

“What’s the plan, big man?” JJ asked.

“We’re gonna steal that shit back.” John B answered, and we all took off running towards the Twinkie.

“We go in there, guns a-blazin’, and make Ward Cameron beg for mercy, abscond with as much gold as possible and vamanos, get the hell out of there.” JJ said, reloading the gun from where he sat beside me. 

“Send that shit right down the Intracoastal.” JB added.

“Wait for weather.” Kie chimed in.

“Exit to Cuba.” Pope finished.

“Cuba? No, man, Xcalak, Jewel of the Yucatan. Lobsters so thick, mangoes, and no word for money.” JJ countered, finishing reloading the gun.

“Yucatan, baby.” I said, making JJ smile at me. He grabbed my face and pulled me in for a kiss, making Pope groan.

“So when did that happen?” John B asked. “I was gone for like 36 hours.”

“A lot happened in 36 hours.” Kie answered. 

John B drove the Twinkie to a road across from the airport and parked next to the fence, and we all ran out to see what we could see. Pope used the binoculars, and said they were loading up the gold. 

John B quickly took the binoculars. “There’s Ward.” Then something John B saw made him lower the binoculars.

“What?” I asked.

“It’s Sarah.”

“She’s with him?” Pope asked.

John B looked back through the binoculars. “Wait a minute… He’s hurting her. They’re fighting.” John B handed Pope the binoculars than ran off. We heard the Twinkie start up and turned around in confusion.

JJ grabbed me, pulling me out of the way before John B drove forward to ram the fence.

“John B! What are you doing?!” JJ screamed, but John B just kept driving, down to the runway.

“What do we do?” I asked, blocking the sun with my hand, trying to get a better look. 

We quickly heard sirens approaching.

“I can’t go to jail.” Pope said.

“I’m on probation.” JJ added.

“Look, we’re no good if we’re all in jail.” Kie said.

JJ grabbed my hand, pulling me along as we all took off running. We found a nearby shack and hung out in there, waiting. Then we saw the plane fly overhead.

“There goes the gold.” Pope said.

“Shit!” JJ shouted, kicking a box. Pope threw something at the wall of the shack. “Fuck!” 

“Pope!” Kie tried. Pope picked up a wrench and hit a pole. “God damn it!”

Pope began breaking more and more things, shouting every curse under the sun.

I watched helplessly, like my body was frozen. I didn’t want to be standing there, I wanted to comfort my friend, but my feet wouldn’t move.

Eventually, Pope ran out of steam and sat down.

“Yeah dude. I was wondering when this was gonna happen.” JJ said, walking over to Pope.

“JJ what the hell are you talking about?” I asked.

JJ held out a cart for Pope. “Here you go, Chief. A little weed never hurt no one.”

“JJ…” Kie said.

“C’mon Kie-”

“You know he doesn’t smoke.” 

But then Pope grabbed the cart. “Maybe not before today.” JJ retorted.

“Yeah what is that gonna help?” Kie questioned.

“What is it gonna hurt?” I countered.

“I lost my scholarship. Walked out in the middle of the interview. Every- it’s gone. It’s not gonna happen.” Pope explained, his voice cracking.

“You did that for us?” Kie asked.

“No, not for us. For nothing.”

“I’m here for you, Pope. Welcome to my world, okay?” JJ tried again.

“JJ-” Kie sighed.

“What, Kie, he’s right. It doesn’t matter anymore.”\

“JJ,” I said softly, and he sighed, putting his hands on his head in frustration.

Pope took a hit.

“You don’t have to do that.” Kie said.

“What do you care?” Pope threw back at her. But then I heard footsteps and turned around, seeing John B.

“Oh my god-” I said, making everyone turn around, we quickly ran over to him. He had blood on his hands.

“Is this yours?” JJ asked.

“Whose blood is that?” Kie asked.

We heard sirens before he could answer, we all had to duck and hide. Once the sirens passed, we ran to Kie’s house, she was closest and she had keys to her mom’s jeep.

John B told Kie to drive us to the police station, and she didn’t question him, but JJ did once we pulled up, but John B was adamant he had to tell the cops what happened. 

Pope hit the blunt that JJ rolled, and let out a cough just as Kie parked the car. I took the blunt from him and took a hit.

“Easy there, chief. Damn.” JJ drew out.

I leaned forward to pat Pope’s back while he continued coughing.

“Alright. I’m just gonna be real with you right now. You might end up in the lion’s den, but you don’t go there on purpose. It’s fundamental, just like my old man always told me, you should never trust cops, no matter what the circumstance is.” JJ said.

“Your old man’s an abusive liar.” Kie spoke up.

“I agree with JJ. Fuck the police.” Pope said, taking me by surprise.

“You goin’ to the dark side now?” Kie questioned.

“When’s the last time the police helped us?”

“Peterkin looked out for me, alright? Tried to, at least. They need to know.” John B said before opening the car door and stepping out.

JJ blew out some air. “What are the chances the cops are any help?”

“I’d say slim to none.” I said, before taking another hit. JJ pulled the blunt from my lips and replaced it with his lips, taking the smoke straight from my mouth before exhaling it. We sat in silence for a few minutes, but then we heard shouting.

“Start the car, Kie!” John B’s voice shouted. The door opened and JB practically fell in, yelling at Kie to go. A cop banged on the window, but Kie started driving, and we got away from them. 

Once he regained himself, he told us what happened. Ward pegged the murder on John B, and now every cop in the county was looking for him. We couldn’t go back to the chateau, that’s the first place they’d look. We didn’t have many options, so we parked on the side of the road and took turns sleeping. Kie and Pope took the front, while me, JJ and John B were crammed in the back.

In the early morning, we all heard sirens heading our way, so Pope and Kie reclined their seats to hide, and the three of us in the back ducked down until the sirens passed. The radio was on, but then they started talking about the murder of Peterkin, so Kie turned it off.

“Let’s game this out.” JJ said, fidgeting with his lighter. He had me laying on his arm, with his hat lowered. “Maybe you guys can help, being the smart ones and all, but… who are the cops going to believe? Ward Cameron or us? So the accuser is a bigshot developer, kind of lord of the island, got the governor on speed dial kind of person, and the accused… is John B who is… pretty much a homeless 16-year-old boy at the moment.”

“Thanks.” John B replied. I turned my head to look at JJ. “You’re not being very helpful.” JJ lifted his hat slightly to look at me.  “Shit.” Pope spoke up. “You want me to be helpful, baby? I’m telling you guys, Yucatan, alright? I’m saying that’s the only option.” JJ said. “Enough with the Mexico bullshit. Sarah will bail me out.” John B said. “She did witness the whole thing.” Kie pointed out. “And she’s gonna snitch on her brother?” Pope countered.

My face twisted with conflicted feelings, both side had good points, and as much as Sarah was growing on me, it didn’t feel right to rely on her to fix this problem. I looked over to JJ, concern etched into my features, making him let out a sigh as he sat up, carefully guiding me up with him. “It’s not happening, bro, okay? We’ve gotta get you off the island.”

“The ferry. It’s the only way.” Pope said. “Yeah, exit stage left while you still can, dude, okay? Before the entire island is on lockdown.” JJ added.

Sirens came into earshot. “Guys just get down.” Kie said softly, and we all laid back while more police cars drove past.  “Sarah’s not a Pogue, John B.” Pope said. “Yeah, you can’t stay here, man.” JJ added, laying back down, pulling his hat down with him. Kie turned around to look at John B. “Ferry?”  John B let out a sigh. “Ferry.”

When we got to the ferry, Pope went to check it out, and buy John B’s ticket for him, but he returned with bad news.

“The ferry’s closed, and there’s this.” Pope said, handing a paper to Kie. I sat up from the twisted cuddle pile that had become the trunk of the jeep. 

“What is that? What is this?” John B asked. Kie handed me the paper, but JJ quickly snatched it from me. “Well, John B, uh, this is a good framer of you.” JJ said holding up the wanted poster. 

“Okay, so the whole island’s lookin’ for John B right now.” Pope said. “That’s a lot of money.” Kie added. “Congratulations, John B, you’re famous.” JJ said.

“Remember what I said about not being helpful?” I asked, taking the poster back to look it over. Cops were offering $25,000 for him.

“Okay, guys we gotta get to the HMS. We need small, no running lights-” Kie started planning.

“It’s at the Chateau, Kie.” John B reminded her.

“And I wonder if the cops got the entire place staked out, let me think. Oh, yeah, no they definitely have that place locked down.” JJ said sarcastically. “Let me think, just give me a second… JJ!” Pope said. “What?” “Does your dad still have that boat? The cigarette boat, the Phantom, the one he used to race.” “Maybe…” “You could get right up the coast, no problem.”

Kie, Pope and JJ all started talking at once while Pope tried to get us out of there, but traffic wasn’t moving, and I was starting to get antsy.

“Can you relax? JJ, how much weed did you give him?” Kie asked. “Pope drive!” I said loudly. “Hey the car’s on the poster.” John B pointed out.

Pope honked his horn, but people starting pointing and gathering around the jeep. He tried to turn the engine over, all of us shouting at him until the car lurched forward and bumped the car in front of us. Pope quickly turned the wheel and push forward, peeling out of there. Pope hit a mailbox, laughing hysterically while I held on to the seat in front of me for dear life.

“I should be the last one to tell you this, but you are not okay to drive, dude, stop!” JJ helping me stay upright while Pope swerved. Pope halted to a stop. 

“John B get out.” He said.

“He’s right, we’ll draw the cops, you run.” JJ agreed. “I’ll get the rig and I’ll meet you in the dump tomorrow, okay? Three o’ clock tomorrow at the dump!” JJ shouted as John B practically fell out of the car and began running. Pope immediately sped off again. We kept driving even after losing the sirens.

“Hey, you okay, baby?” JJ asked softly. “I’m fine, but I think you’re right, Pope shouldn’t drive.” I said, looking at Pope through the rear view mirror. “I said I was sorry.”

“Papa J will roll you a blunt, make you feel all better.” JJ said, reaching for his bag. “Ew. Is that a sex thing?” Kie asked. JJ’s head whipped around back to look at me. “Can it be?” I rolled my eyes and pushed him gently. “Just roll the blunt, I’m pretty sure Pope gave me whiplash.”

JJ broke out laughing hysterically. “You clocked that car, man, it was so bad.”  “I’m just glad I’m not driving now.” Pope joked. “Real funny.” I said. “Pull over!” Kie commanded, and Pope obeyed. “It’s not funny, JJ, he shouldn’t be driving.” Kie scolded as she got out of the car, switching seats with Pope. “Uh oh... she's mad.” JJ mumbled. “Where are we going, Kie?” I asked. “The last place they’ll look.” Kie answered before driving off.

That meant Ward Cameron’s home.

[tamelee]

Do ppl genuinely believe gaara has a crush on naruto? I thought it was a joke 😭 the jokes like gaara hating sasuke are funny but they're far from true considering in canon he cried for sasuke and tried to tell him to return. He told naruto later on that sasuke's not planning on coming back bc it was true, not bc he's jealous or some shit 💀 it was naruto who got upset at that and shoved his hand away, and also bc gaara made it clear that if in the war sasuke is on the enemy team then he won't hold back and will go for the kill. He's just another person who doesn't care about sasuke anymore which is why naruto got mad. To me only naruto and sasuke being romantically in love makes any sense, when ppl bring in not only gaara but even shikamaru, neji, Lee, sai it just seem like a joke bc wtf? Most of those ppl are pretty openly straight anyway. It seems like only sasunaru fans do this, they think every man around naruto wants him and is jealous of sasuke and sasuke's not a good bf but all of that is pure projection and stupidity and they act like incels when they treat naruto like some helpless girl with her Chad bf who should instead be with the nice guys. Anyway that went sorta off topic but yeah I don't think gaara's actually in love. Or if he is, he's not the jealous type bc I admit if he was a girl, even dudebros might see it with him. It's just that naruto has it part of his character that everyone worships him sooner or later. Whenever he changes someone they become his fan and act like he's God. Gaara, neji, shikamaru, pain, obito, tsunade. Sasuke's the only special one bc their relationship is actually different and special. But even for him sometimes some sns fans reduce him to a naruto worshipper in sns fics. Or they talk about the "i'm in naruto's world, I'm blessed to exist" quote that seems an awful lot like idol worship. I hate when they reduce sasuke and his relationship to naruto to that, that's hinata's job, to be naruto's personal slave, not sasuke. And if you remember this while analyzing gaara he just seems like yet another character that got reduced to a naruto dick sucker, that's all.

Gaara and Sai openly straight Nonee? xD I understand your points, but I do think you’re doing yourself a HUGE disservice if you think Gaara is just a... *checks* 👀... “Naruto dick sucker”... 

... kinda falls short, no? Their bond is distinct, and categorizing it as similar to Naruto's other connections, especially when most are comrades at best. Villagers conditionally acknowledge Naruto because they see him as useful until he proves otherwise, and that includes the majority of his... friends. Naruto said it himself, he doesn’t trust them (I HAVE A THEORY ABOUT THIS REGARDING 'HOPE' TBH I’LL FINISH THAT DRAFT SOON FINALLY LOL) This lack of trust is evident again during his fight with Kurama.

With Gaara, it is very uniquely a bond of their own regardless whether someone believes it is romantic or not and it doesn’t really have anything to do with Sasuke, so I’m not sure how to feel about a comparison? 

However, Naruto's connection with Gaara does share some similarities with his bond with Sasuke; hurting for Gaara’s pain because he understood it as fellow Jinchuuriki, or hurting for Sasuke’s pain and burdens but going on a journey because he wanted to understand (‘we could’ve been in each other’s shoes, Sasuke’). These bonds also relate to the system itself, which is closely interlinked. Hence, Sasuke shouting at Naruto for not understanding in VotE1. But it's not the same thing, and that's perhaps one of the most significant differences between Naruto's bonds with Sasuke and Gaara, don't you think? The contrasting pain (regarding that understanding) he felt played a crucial role in his learning process. "I felt less pain when I escaped loneliness, but Gaara was lonelier for longer and Sasuke has to live with this burden... which is unbearable, what can I do?" Collaboration only becomes possible when you can truly understand one another. The same was seen during the Shinobi War when they had to unite as a single alliance. Gaara references this several times.

That understanding transcends national borders, and it's an integral part of Naruto's Ninja Way. It's also a way to demonstrate that mutual understanding could potentially unite the Nations, but that's a different topic. What remains consistent is Naruto's anger towards the entire system when it becomes personal and disregarding what is seen as 'appropriate Shinobi behavior'. (Lmao not those anti-Naruto post claiming Naruto was fine with everything altogether 😭 ffs, delete.) 

Of course Naruto’s emotions played a huge part in him going feral. It was primarily triggered by Gaara's death, but even before that Kurama's Chakra was slipping through as he was learning about himself, Jinchuuriki and discovering new things that Konoha, and even Jiraiya, whom he trained with for years, had never shared with him. Our boy was seriously going through it, but this drive wasn’t just him showing Shonen Hero behavior to ‘stop the bad guys from gaining power’ or grieving a friends’ death at that moment even.

Naruto had every right to be furious. This is the same anger that says, 'If you Shinobi of the Leaf hadn't placed a monster in me,' and 'Did any of you even try to ask ME how I felt?!!' But, of course, Naruto repressed his anger and avoided empathizing with himself. However, this anger still simmers beneath the surface in the story. (Sakura's display of compassion for Naruto's situation after realizing he could die was a good moment tbh, I liked it even if Naruto shoved it aside. Kinda like he was saying they could never understand as Sasuke said to him, except Naruto sorta laughs it off and shows confidence instead. Anw, Sakura's best moments are in this arc, and it has nothing to do with the Sasori fight.)

But why doesn't Naruto express anger for himself?

Because, in this case, he carries a sense of guilt towards Gaara. He heard Gaara express how he desperately searched for a reason to live, feeling like a 'relic of the past that people wanted to get rid of'—unwanted and alone. This led Gaara to decide to care only for himself and kill everyone else. While Naruto could empathize with Gaara due to the shared pain stemming from similar situations, he also understood that their circumstances were entirely different at the time he met him. Naruto compared his own situation with Gaara's, stating that 'everyone' else had saved him from a dark and lonely hell, lumping the village together to contrast it with Gaara, who had no one still.

Naruto eventually said that Iruka and Sasuke were the ones who truly saved him after learning about different types of bonds and gaining a better understanding. However, the idea of being supported by so many people, (conditional or not) in contrast to Gaara, tore Naruto apart because he knows how unbearable it is to live that way. The Gaara he encountered during the exams represented Naruto's greatest fear for himself, and he began to feel guilty for having people around him, or even those who 'worship' him, as he felt it was unfair to Gaara. Despite his repressed emotions, Itachi's 'fear-inspiring Genjutsu' exposed Naruto's feelings and fears.

Naruto's efforts didn't just lead to a strong friendship; they also provided Gaara with hope. In this story, 'Hope' is perhaps the most important theme, a reason to live that is much more bearable. I wouldn't reduce all of this to Gaara merely 'worshipping' Naruto. Such analysis seems to miss the nuances of their complex bond regardless.

Naruto's sharing of joy also reflects his 'mysterious power.' He had mixed feelings about seeing Gaara advance so quickly as Kazekage but also genuinely felt happy for him. I genuinely believe that dismissing the Naruto-Gaara dynamic as mere 'worship' overlooks the significant impact Naruto had on Gaara and those around them. Which was extremely important to the story itself. I love the bond between Naruto and Gaara, but acknowledge it really isn't the same as the one with Sasuke. But considering their relationship, it's not surprising that Gaara might have a little crush on Naruto. However, it's not essential to insist on finding canonical evidence for this imo. While it's a plausible interpretation, I don't think that Gaara's feelings for Naruto are taken too seriously by most fans? Furthermore, Gaara's seeming 'pettiness' regarding Sasuke or Naruto's prioritization of him above others is not something anyone understood. The general consensus "for Naruto's sake" was that “Sasuke causes Naruto pain” (more like, Sasuke’s pain hurts Naruto because he loves him) so of course, Gaara's feelings were conflicted by his duty (getting rid of a 'criminal') and his friendship with Naruto (who will fight against such Shinobi duties because feelings are involved and they'll never be able to truly become emotionless tools-). Sasuke had attacked the summit after all, usually an immediate death sentence regardless of reason. Gaara is Naruto’s friend, it would be weird if he didn’t want to protect Naruto in return even against Sasuke, it's just that Naruto didn't see it the same way as everyone around him. THAT is frustrating!! Remember he told Naruto to really think about his friendship with Sasuke and what it meant? 👀 Like, "Naruto, you really want to do this? We are friends too, yeah? Doesn’t he cause you pain? Look at you... think about this carefully, kinda sus tbh. What’s this meaaann? I give my life for you, I will fight for you but what we do now huh?" Etc- 

In the end, Naruto is the protagonist of a Shonen story, serving as a measuring device to gauge the significance of events in the narrative. (This role is largely shared with Sasuke though). Naruto provides the reference point for understanding the story's relationships. The core message, typically related to positive change as defined by Naruto/the main character, is a fundamental aspect of these stories. What truly matters is why something is significant in the story and what it means to the characters. His bond with Gaara a huge part of it. And to a degree the others as well because that's kind of the point.... And it's not for nothing we haven't seen the same development with the villagers as a whole because it wasn't important to the story.... yet. (Should've been solved before he became Hokage though 😂 "Naruto-the-village-is-family-I-guess-cuz-former-hokage-said-so-Uzumaki." Bro.)

"only sasunaru fans do this, they think every man around naruto wants him and is jealous of sasuke and sasuke's not a good bf but all of that is pure projection and stupidity and they act like incels when they treat naruto like some helpless girl with her Chad bf who should instead be with the nice guys."

Ngl, I can't disagree with this one. Idk why the Naruto-bl-harem is so popular? And ok, have them all worship Naruto for all I care, but why is he always so....... dainty. Don't mind me some uwu-Naruto, he's cute alright, but.... no 😭 I don't even have words.

"Sasuke's the only special one bc their relationship is actually different and special. But even for him sometimes some sns fans reduce him to a naruto worshipper in sns fics."

I mean... to a certain degree. Define worshipping 👀 from what I can read about the true definition, their 'worshipping' is pretty mutual, but the difference lies in the foundation and the fact that it is unconditional. I know what you mean though, the Sasuke guilt tripping is real and a bit painful. Like? Isn't that Esaka's job?

"Or they talk about the "i'm in naruto's world, I'm blessed to exist" quote that seems an awful lot like idol worship."

UGH! 😓 This stupid non-canon quote. Did everyone forget who wrote this novel about Sasuke 'atoning for his sins'??? 😭 SPOILER: NOT KISHIMOTO. (Kinda want to read it though to fact-check some things.) There might be some truth in the words now that I have spent many months thinking about the blank period... but so does Naruto not want to live without Sasuke. As much as their world includes the other, they are still their own characters with their own goals in a Shinobi world with a system that would never allow them to truly live in each others' worlds fully anyway gerigjekrg3rhiqjkhmregqerigkjqrg;-; ok bye.

[ambersky0319]

I am feeling

Conflicted

Ramblings below cut

So I got an email from an old friend a little over a week ago that I only just now saw because I haven't really been checking that email much (I've slowly been changing accounts for things to a different one and so I. Don't really need to check this one much)

Except the old friend is from the best friend who I drifted away from once we started high school (specifically once quarantine hit) cause like. While we were on the same campus we were in different schools so schedules didn't align, and there wasn't many ways we could talk bc after quarantine she didn't have a phone (her choice, totally valid) and I didn't really do casual emails w friends (too formal for me, + I used to only check my email like. Once a day) so like. We didn't really communicate

And then she went and told my sib that no one (not even me) cares about them (granted, I don't have the friend's side, but I know my sib and they were going through a shitty mental health period AND admitted they were scared to tell me about the incident. And, I knew my friend. Sib and I didn't have the best relationship, and she was my best friend during that time, and used to make fun of sib a lot when she came over or sib was just generally around. She was not, however, around when sib and I's relationship improved. So I wouldn't put it past her to say something like that to my sib.)

So. I was pissed. And just didn't contact her, even when her mom reached out to my grandma (I was never more glad that my cousin was graduating the same day as her, so I had an excuse to miss her graduation)

Keep in mind, as far as I know, she still considered us friends? I think? I remember her introducing me to her other friends as her best friend but like. Most of the time the last time we had exchanged ANY words had been? Months apart???

So I wasn't really considering her among my friends much at the time. And the last time I remember speaking with her, I was with a different friend, and I just felt. Weird about it. Like the way she talked, it reminded me so much of like, how we were in middle school? Except. I had definitely changed a lot since then, so it felt. Really off.

So that confused me.

ANYWAYS

Back to the email. I have a bit of a reply typed up, but I'm conflicted about sending it

So I'm gonna ramble about my thoughts on what she said in hers

It was pretty short, so I'll go in order of what was mentioned

Condolences for my mom's death

I'll be real, I forgot my mom died. I'm pretty sure I had been saying she was dead LONG before that, for no other reason than I thought she had already died. Either way, I genuinely hadn't cared.

She even says she knows we didn't have a good relationship (yeah, no contact with an abusive parent is definitely just a "not good" relationship, one which she WAS around for the aftermath of because! We became friends about a year after I had left that house!) but that it probably still stings, and that she's here for me if I wanna talk

Also she says "them" so I'm assuming she might also be including my dad in that sentence but? Idk???

Either way idk how to feel about this point.

"I know I haven't really been a good friend or best friend"

I mean, neither have I technically? But I genuinely didn't realize she still even considered us friends after like most of our time in high school not talking. Junior year we MAYBE talked for like. 3 minutes at a time

And like. With online friends? The time passed for me to stop considering them friends is MUCH longer than irl friends. Idk why that is for me, but it just is.

So like. She was an acquaintance at most to me at this point. Maybe I should have made more of an effort, but I'll be honest, I just. Didn't want to

Anyway this was followed by saying she hasn't been doing well the past couple of years and like. I feel for her. The last couple years haven't been easy on me either. Glad she's doing better now

I'm also kinda assuming that this part was an apology. But it's more like. An acknowledgement? Like there's no actual apology for not really being a friend or anything?

Still surprised she's sent me an email

Compliments the fan reference project she's seen on my insta

She has never interacted, afaik, with my insta account. She says she doesn't use it herself but checked out my account through her mom's account

Never really reached out to me there or anything either. And like, that's fine. But idk. I just felt a little weird about that. Not about using her mom's account, not even checking out my account. But like. I kinda got whiplash? Because the email was more serious before this and like, cool she likes my art, cool she's still doing art, but why mention it? In an email where you talk about family deaths and mental health???

Idk. Maybe a way to try reconnecting? Find some common ground?

Mentions her own personal loss then well-wishes

This is the main reason I'm conflicted about replying

Because I saw who this email was from in my inbox. And frankly, I was tempted to not read it. I was tempted to just clear it out because I was clearing out my inbox for the first time in weeks

But I decided, what the heck, why not? Because I haven't spoken to her since probably early 2023, if that, and I was curious about what she could have possibly emailed me about

And like. I could just delete it. Move on with my life and forget about it. Ignore the email entirely and not respond

But. That feels pretty shitty? Especially since her mom and my grandma are still in contact? (maybe??? Idk I asked my grandma to just not mention my friend or her mom to me)

So like. I have a reply written up.

I explained how I felt about my mom's death, because frankly I don't want people thinking I cared about her. I apologized for not being a good friend either. And sending my condolences for her loss. Wishing her and her family the best.

The thing is. I'm. Hesitating to send it

Because she started off the email by saying she'll be getting a new phone and number soon, and will be sending me it once she gets it. And the thing is. I don't? Really know if I want that?

Like. Part of me wants to talk again. If only to see if she's changed, and to hear what she has to say about what she told my sibling. Maybe reconnect, depending on the outcome. Because she was my best friend for four years and this is also a clear attempt to try connecting again on her part, and I'd feel bad not at least, idk, getting closure on the relationship?

Part of me though, just kinda. Doesn't want to even try reconnecting. Just. Leave that era of my life behind (with her along with it).

So. I'm not commenting on that in my email.

I'll. Probably send the email. Mostly to share my condolences. I don't plan on saying I'm here if she wants to talk, that would be unfair to her. We aren't close anymore, I was barely able to be there for my sib when our mom died (because they WERE affected by her death) and the fact that I genuinely don't know if I'd even want to reconnect... It's selfish on my part I think, but I really wouldn't want to make false promises about something that serious

Anyways

This ended up longer than I was expecting it to be

[the-kittens-of-vol-tron]

HEAR ME OUT!!!! LANCE HATES WHEN PEOPLE TOUCH HIS BACK BC OF THE EXPLOSION PLS PLS PLS

Y'know I've thought about this a lot :0

-----

The thing about being thrown into space on a giant metal blue lion in the middle of a galactic war you had no idea was happening; everyone you know has faced a near-death experience. The team quickly became numb to certain things that would take months to years to process and overcome on earth. 

Every day they were fighting for their lives and the lives of each other; chugging along to make it through each day. 

Lance was aware of this. He knew they had to block certain things from their mind in order to keep pushing through; which is why he hated how much he relived the explosion. 

He didn’t relive it physically over and over again, but his mind made him feel like he was physically reliving it. He kept this issue hidden away. Didn’t tell the team the countless nights he woke up to ringing in his ears, his skin sticky with sweat, a scream dying in his throat. 

He didn’t tell the team the reason the bags under his eyes were beginning to match Shiro's was because every time he closed his eyes the sound echoed in his mind. The burning sensation consumed him and he swore he could still feel the flames lick at him. 

Lance felt as if he was constantly on edge. Parties were no longer entertaining for him. He dreaded every new person that entered the castle, no matter the smile they wore on their face. 

He hated how he saw everyone as a threat, constantly checking behind him to make sure nothing was trying to sneak up behind him. He no longer spent time in the observation deck, wishing that he was home. 

The only comfort he found was inside of Blue or wrapped up in his bed. 

“I tell you what, you paladins of Voltron are just what we need to win this war,” the king of the planet they had just freed slapped his hand (it was more of a penguin fin) on Lance’s back. 

Lance felt his entire body go stiff, his breath getting caught in his throat. The sounds around him began to swim in his mind, nothing was clear anymore. His mouth suddenly went dry, his eyes frantically scanning the area around him and someone laughed in the space around him. 

The pressure was removed off his back and he quickly took a step away, trying not to make his motions seem wobbly. 

“We are just happy to help. I hope we can count on you for our attack against the Galran empire.” Allura's voice slowly rang clear in his mind and he slowly regained the ability to fill his lungs. 

He bolted back to his lion as soon as he was given the cue, letting himself shake in his chair for a moment. Trying to shake the image that was stuck in his mind. You’re okay. We’re okay. The team is safe. I’m safe. You’re okay. We’re- He let his mind repeat these words; trying to convince his mind it was the truth. 

Lance passed that moment off as a one-time deal. Rationalizing that it was a stranger that touched him and if it was someone on the team he would have been okay. 

He told himself that, believing it was the truth until it was proven wrong. 

“Hey, I just wanted to say you did good today Lance,” Shiro walked beside him, placing his human hand on his upper back in a proud older brother moment. 

Lance stumbled forward, twisting himself around to face Shiro. “Thanks,” he quickly turn back down the hallway, heading straight for his room. As soon as the door closed behind him he allowed himself to break. 

He allowed the small sobs to escape his lips, the tears to streak his face, his body to curl into itself where he sat against his door. The heat from the explosion felt lively on his skin. He rationally knew Shiro didn’t burn him with anything but where his hand was placed felt like it was on fire. 

He could feel himself rocking where he sat, trying to tell himself he was okay, he was safe. But this time, his brain didn’t believe him. 

Lance was aware he needed help. He knew he should confine in someone, maybe Coran? But every time he scrounged up the courage to spill his guts to someone the alarms would blare and he would be rushing down to his lion. 

He felt like a walking corpse. The lack of sleep at night was starting to catch up to him. Causing little mistakes throughout his day. He slid into Hunk at training, nearly knocked Pidge’s computer over, he bumped directly into Shiro while they passed each other in the hall. 

He was slipping, he felt like a glass object teetering over the edge of a table. One wrong move and he would be shattered beyond repair. 

He did everything he could to keep himself from falling. He started to live by certain rules. 

1) No one, absolutely no one was allowed to touch his back in any capacity. No more hugs from Hunk, no more pats on the back, no contact at all. 

2) Always watch your back. Don’t let anyone or anything sneak up on you or a team member. 

3) Never let anyone behind you. Stand against the wall. Always bring up the end of the line. 

4) Be aware of your surroundings.

He memorized these rules, repeating them under his breath in the shower, while he was getting dressed, as he was crawling into bed. They were security in a sense. As long as he followed them, nothing bad would happen to him. 

He leaned against one of the walls in the training room, his hands on his knees as he caught his breath. His teammate did similar things. Pidge laying in the center of the room, Keith chugging a bottle of water, Hunk slumped down by the door, Shiro wiping the sweat off his forehead with a towel.

To say Lance was exhausted was an understatement. He couldn't even remember the last time he properly slept.

Which is was caused him to forget rule #4.

"I think we're getting better at working together." Keith leaned against the wall by Lance, his eyes gazing over the training area.

Lance told himself to breathe, giving a small nod at the other boy.

Keith looked at him, "I'm really happy we put that rivalry behind us." Keith placed his hand on Lance's upper right back shoulder blade.

It was a friendly gesture, Lance knew that. There was no anger or hatred behind the action. Keith was simply being friendly. Being a good teammate.

Unfortunately, Lance's brain wasn't wired to see the situation like that anymore.

His body reacted before his rational mind could catch up. His left hand reached across his chest, grabbing Keith's wrist from where his hand was placed on his body. He yanked on it as soon as he had a strong enough grip and Keith went tumbling forward; slightly rolling over Lance's shoulder.

By the time Lance realized his fellow red paladin was on the ground the team was already making their way toward the two at their own paces.

He backed himself against the wall, his brain running a mile a minute. His breathing was labored and his vision began to swim; he was in pure panic mode.

Keith was being helped up by Shiro who was looking at Lance with confusion but preparedness; Lance didn't doubt that he would tackle him if he tried to attack another team member.

"Lance, just take it easy." Hunk held his hands out in front of him, almost as if he was trying to calm a wild animal. Maybe that's what Lance looked like right now.

Others were talking, their voices melted together and Lance placed his hands over his ears, begging the sounds to stop. He could feel his head shaking as he tried to block the noise.

He looked at his team, and they all looked back with wide eyes. "I'm sorry," he looked towards the closet exit to him, "I need...I have to go." He wasn't sure how he managed to run out of the room without someone grabbing him but he thanked the universe for being able to escape.

He began snapping his armor off in the process, leaving it scattered in his room before stumbling into his bathroom. He borderline ripped his undershirt off his body, trying to stop the burn that was steadily consuming his skin.

He fumbled with the water in the shower, stepping into the freezing temperature, trying to ease the pain.

He could hear pounding on his door and his fingers tangled in his hair. You're okay, you're okay. Just breath. You're okay-

He wasn't sure how long he sat in the freezing water, he wasn't sure when the pounding stopped. When the burning feeling stopped and his body went numb he reached up and turned off the water; he wasn't sure when he slumped to the ground.

He sat in the shower a while longer, letting his body shake from the temperature. He knew he needed to warm up, he needed to pull his pants off his body and changed into something dry. Why was moving so hard right now?

Maybe he dozed off, he had to of since he jolted awake to his bedroom door opening. He glanced at his bathroom door, it was locked, but it wasn't hard to overrule the system.

"Go away, I don't want to talk yet." He hated how his voice wavered on his words, he was tired. So so tired.

"Lance? We don't have to talk, but may I come in?"

Lance closed his eyes, Coran always had a sense of comfort surrounding him. Lance always saw him as an uncle figure.

"Yeah."

The door slid open a couple of moments later, Coran giving him a sad smile. "Did you take a shower?"

Lance hugged his knees, still shivering, "something like that."

Coran nodded and left the room, returning quickly with his pajamas and a towel. "Get changed, I'll go get you some Pressed Cider!" He placed the clothing on the counter by the sink and disappeared.

Lance allowed his body to fall into autopilot and he quickly got changed, leaving his wet clothes in the bottom of the shower and he sat on his bed. His breathing still felt labored in a way, but his bed was safe. Nothing could hurt him here.

Coran reappeared later, two mugs in his hands and a blanket folded up under his arm. He handed the blue mug to his paladin and placed his black mug on the bedside dresser.

He unfolded the blanket and slowly wrapped his around Lance, taking a seat a couple of inches away from him.

"The team said you had a moment."

Lance took a small sip of his drink, focusing on the spice taste that covered his tongue. The temperature was slightly on the hot side, a great improvement from Coran's initial attempts of sharing this drink. Alteans used to put fire rocks in their drinks.

"Keith is okay if you were concerned about him."

Lance nodded.

"But it's nice to know your training is paying off number 3."

Lance gave him an obligatory smile and cast his eyes down at his cup.

"I'm all ears if you need to get something off your chest my boy."

Lance stared down into the dark orange liquid, Coran was with him that day. Maybe he had his own suffering from it. "Does that day ever bother you? The explosion on Arus."

Coran was quiet for a moment, something out of his character, but he eventually released a small sigh. "Yes...sometimes I feel as though I can't shake it. Does it haunt you?"

Lance gave a small nod, taking another sip of his drink. "I relive it every day. I know I'm okay but I sometimes feel like my skin is still being burned."

"Shiro said Keith touched your shoulder and that's when you...had your moment."

Lance appreciated his attempt to lessen the realistic damaged he actually caused to his team. "I didn't mean to."

"I didn't think you did. You're not someone who would attack your team member unless absolutely necessary."

"I don't like people touching my back. I have a list of rules." Coran gave him a questioning look and Lance quickly repeated his rules. "It's the only way I could keep myself going."

"Why didn't you tell one of us?" Coran didn't sound disappointed, but his voice was laced with sadness.

"I didn't want to burden anyone. You lost your family, your whole planet. Shiro was a prisoner for a year, Keith lost his parents, Pidge lost her family...I just had one thing happen to me."

"Lance," Coran placed a comforting hand on his knee, "don't let your mind convince you just because someone has it worst you can't struggle. That was a traumatizing day, sometimes when you run late for breakfast or back to the castle I worry you're gone. I feel as though the team feels the same."

Lance blinked away the tears that were forming in his eyes.

"The team isn't mad at you."

"Keith should be."

Coran shook his head, "he's not. They're just concerned."

"Oh."

"Tell you what. Let's finish our drinks and then we can talk to the team together. See what we can do to support you through this."

Lance dropped his head, "okay."

-----

Hmmmm love me some angst and a supportive team

Thank you!

I hope you like it <33

[adoringhaikyuu]

when their teammate has a crush on you | 2

characters: akaashi + kyoutani + osamu + tendou

request: aaaaaaa!! i was stalking your feed when i thought of something 👉🏻👈🏻so you did a "when their teammate has a crush on you" and i reaaaally loved it a lot🥺could you do it with tendou, akaashi, kyoutani, and osamu? if you want to!! • by @kalesugar​

warnings: osamu and tendou’s are suggestive

notes: since osamu’s and tendou’s are sexual, everyone is 18+ in those but in the others there is no smut + (i might write a fic about tendou’s bc i’ve been wanting to write a smut w them idk if people want that)

part one | part two

akaashi:

so bokuto might have had a little crush on you

and it’s not like he would actually do anything about it

he respected you and akaashi and your relationship way too much

he even rooted for you two to get together, he thought you were perfect for each other (you were)

but he couldn’t help the way his heart would beat faster when you were around sometimes, the way his eyes would immediately drift to you when you walked in a room, the way your smile made him feel all tingly inside

he was honestly just waiting the feelings out and tried to act normal around you

he told akaashi about his crush on you cause he didn’t want to hide anything from him

and your boyfriend understood why he would have a crush on you, he couldn’t blame him––but that doesn’t mean he was too happy about it

realistically he wasn’t going to ban him from seeing you or anything, you were allowed to interact

but part of him felt a little odd when bokuto would make jokes with you, a light blush on his cheeks that you most likely assumed was from his laughter 

bokuto sure was making you laugh a lot tonight. the three of you were hanging out at his place for your weekly hangout and it seemed he just had an endless amount of jokes. it’s not that akaashi didn’t like his jokes, it’s just that he didn’t like that it seemed as though his best friend was making the jokes for the sole purpose of making you laugh. 

he thought he was doing a good job at hiding his inner thoughts, but in reality, you had picked up on them almost immediately. you waited until you were in the comfort of akaashi’s home, where you were staying the night, to ask him about it when you noticed he wasn’t going to bring it up himself.

“is something bothering you? could tell you weren’t really here tonight.” 

he looked away and shrugged, and you stepped closer to him.

“is it...maybe because bokuto has a little crush on me?” 

he held his breath for a second in shock as he looked at you silently, blinking a few times. “you...you know?”

you shrugged, a small smile on your face. “i had a feeling. i mean, your facial expressions may be minimal but i can still decode them keiji.” he blushed and looked down, scratching the back of his head sheepishly. “i could tell you were watching him a little more closely when he would talk to me.” 

“i...i trust him, i do.” he looked into your eyes, “and i trust you too. it’s just...it doesn’t really make me feel too good knowing that bokuto-san,” he muttered the next part, “with all his muscles and charm––has feelings for you.”

you shook your head and put your hands on his cheeks to look into his eyes earnestly. “you have nothing to worry about baby, i promise that. you’re the only man i have eyes for.”

his hands found their spot on your waist as he gave you a small, but grateful and loving smile. “i know. i love you.” he kissed you lightly and you smiled against his mouth. 

“love you too. so much.” 

kyoutani:

let’s say oikawa likes you––

well more-so that he finds you attractive and can’t help but flirt with you from time to time harmlessly

kyoutani doesn’t give a fuck sfkjdh he will growl at his captain

sometimes he’s not even in the mood, he’ll just take your hand or throw you over his shoulder while you’re talking to oikawa and just walk away 

meanwhile oikawa is just pouting and complaining to your boyfriend as he blatantly ignores him

“you know it’s not very nice to interrupt a conversation like that, mad-dog!” 

oikawa wouldn’t actually try to steal you away from your boyfriend, but he did have some genuine questions that were borderline offensive sdfjghs

like “how did mad-dog manage to get you?” 

“are you sure you’re not being held against your will?”

bottom line is, your boyfriend is not happy 

he will try to prevent you from even being in his captain’s line of sight

he’ll step in front of you or turn around and go another way 

when oikawa approached you after the game, strategically waiting for your boyfriend to go get his things so he’d have more time to talk to you, you knew it was only a matter of time before you were snatched away by a growling kyoutani. 

his plan kind of work, considering the conversation lasted about thirty seconds? longer than it normally did. the captain was leaning against the wall next to you, his arm above your head as you looked up at him, completely unaffected by his charming eyes––you appreciated the effort he took to talk to you, but you knew he was just a natural flirt at heart. 

he was mid-sentence when your boyfriend came storming up to the two of you and grabbed your hand, marching you away from the complaining boy. you just laughed and squeezed his hand, “you know i thought you would have gotten tired of doing that by now.” he grumbled in response and you tugged his hand and led him to a quiet corner.

he was looking down at the floor but you put a hand under his chin and made him look you in the eyes, your small smile making him calm down a bit. “you have to stop letting him get to you like this. you know i’d never entertain his flirting––i’m yours.”

he clenched his jaw and nodded, looking to the side when he heard his captain walking by. you turned his head to face you again and surprised him with a kiss and his hands came up to squeeze your waist. he groaned into your mouth and you pulled away to look at him.

“that’s a good way to calm me down.”

you smiled, “oh yeah?”

he nodded, “yeah” and put his lips back on yours. 

osamu:

so atsumu may or may not have had a crush on you

and yes you were dating his brother

no he wasn’t going to steal you (though he thinks he absolutely could if he wanted to), he respects you both and your relationship

and he loves how happy you make his brother

...but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t check you out sometimes or harmlessly flirt with you (he can’t help it, have you seen yourself?)

osamu would catch his brother ogling at you all the time, or hanging around in the room when you’re over for no reason

he’d usually just smack his head and tell him to fuck off

or he’d take a different approach––

you were really trying to pay attention to atsumu’s story, or whatever it is he was saying, but you couldn’t focus on anything but the feeling of osamu’s lips on your neck, and his hand running along your thigh, the other gripping your waist as you sat practically on him on the couch. 

the two of you were spending time together, alone, when atsumu came in, and decided to third-wheel. you didn’t really have a problem with it, but by the way your boyfriend soon pulled you into his lap to distract himself, and most certainly you as well––you could tell he was bothered. 

atsumu trailed off and scratched his neck awkwardly, laughing. “do you guys wanna get a room or something?” he joked and his brother barely lifted his head, hands pulling you even closer. 

“we did get a room, you came in here.”

atsumu rolled his eyes. “so how long are you planning on assaulting y/n’s neck for?” 

osamu lifted his head, annoyance radiating off of him and brought one hand up to tilt your head towards his, his lips grazing yours. “unless you want to see us fuck, you should leave.” 

atsumu blushed but smirked, “i mean...”

osamu glared at him. “get out.”

tendou:

so when you and tendou started dating, you obviously started hanging out with him more, but also ushijima

it’s not like ushijima was expecting to develop feelings for you 

he didn’t want to––he honestly even searched up how to stop a crush from progressing 

he always thought you were nice and good looking but after hanging out with you more, that’s when he realized he liked your personality too and that you were a good person

he waited a little longer before telling tendou––yeah he told him

but tendou had already figured it out, his eyes picking up on the way ushijima was a little more tense or aware of himself when you were around

the way he would smile and blush when you hugged him goodbye

if anything, tendou thought it was cute 

he got you on board with his idea and after you all graduated, you both put the plan in action

ushijima was sat at the edge of the bed, looking at you and his best friend in confusion, “i thought you said my graduation present was in here?”

your boyfriend stood behind you, arms circling around your waist as he peered over your shoulder, his eyes piercing and teasing as he stared at the boy on the bed. “well you see ushi, after you told me about your little crush––which i’m assuming you still have?”

he nodded unashamed, and unblinking as he looked at the two of you and you felt a tingle run down your body. 

tendou went on, “well after that, i figured you might want to have some fun with the two of us,” he kissed your neck teasingly and the brown-haired boy shifted a bit on the bed, clearly itching to touch you. “we both agreed that it was a great idea.” he brought his attention back to your neck and you figured that was your cue to take over.

“so what do you say, ushi?” you sighed softly when tendou sucked a mark onto your sweet spot and you noticed ushijima’s eyes darken. “do you want this graduation present?” 

he licked his lips and scooted forward, his hands squeezing his thighs almost painfully hard. “yes. please–”

[littlemisslipbalm]

“Harry’s stylist, right?”

Summary: Harry and his personal stylist are great collaborators, on screen and off. She helps his visions come to life and in turn they’ve become close friends. As she helps him to bring his fashion dreams come to life during the Fine Line era, will some other dreams come to life as well?

or

Harry and his stylist go from colleagues to friends to lovers because they’ve been in love with each other from the jump

this fit is very important to this part lmaooo - I literally have no idea what to call this lol, anyway I've been sitting on this for forever and I wanted to get something out for yall and i love this story there will be a part 2 when i get to a writing mood. I love this story bc its my literal dream - anyway!! pls enjoy and reblog and lmk what you think :)

Word Count: 14k | Warnings: swearing, drinking, tame for now, should be smut eventually - aka slow burn (what else would you expect from me at this point i guess)

part 2

-

“Hey, H, I just had a question about one of the SNL outfits? Do you have a sec?”

Harry looked up from his phone and raised his brows at his stylist, Y/N.

Y/N had worked with Harry previously. In photoshoots for Another Man magazine and his most recent Gucci campaign. As well as some other random times, such as one-off award show looks and specific appearances. However, this past summer Harry had hired Y/N to work fulltime for him, exclusively. He had told her that he was planning on releasing his second album in the winter and he wanted someone there to help him plan his clothes for music videos, award season, interview appearances, as well as tour outfits.

Y/N stood just inside the doorway of the room, leaning her back against the wall, looking expectantly at him. Her eyes were wide and her lips were pursed. She was dressed simply in a white satin skirt and a matching cropped button-up, they both had cream flowers embroidered on, paired with horsebit slim Gucci mules. Her style was eclectic, but she had definitely noticed an increase of Gucci in her wardrobe since starting her employment with Harry.

Y/N’s passion in life was fashion and clothes and she constantly worried that one of Harry’s outfits wouldn’t deliver as much as she wanted it to. He was quick to tell her not to worry so much though, as long as they both were happy with it, how could anyone else not love it. Plus, he’d always add, it didn’t really matter what anyone else thought. But as more and more events began to crop up, Y/N’s worry over her work grew. She had only been the head stylist for Harry on projects that were still underwraps - except for Lights Up which had been released a couple weeks ago now.

The first project she ever worked on with Harry as his full-time personal stylist was the Lights Up music video. She had never worked so closely with one person for so long on just one project. Harry was insistent in vision and came in the first day filled with ideas, what he imagined for the video's concept and how he wanted to incorporate clothes. She had been happy to make his dreams become reality.

The two of them spent hours at his house for weeks, pouring over every detail of every outfit he planned to wear. They both wanted it to be perfect. And eventually, it all came together, exactly how they had planned. All of the garments for the video took up two entire garment racks. Y/N had made Harry pose in every single outfit for polaroids that she dated and then put into a lookbook she started for him. She had told him she planned to document every outfit she styled for him and Harry had been so excited. The outfits he wore in the video were received with praise when it was finally released, and Harry and Y/N were overjoyed. There was already a party for its release, but they both were especially happy that night. Throughout the evening, Harry and Y/N would gravitate to one another and fall into side conversations about the outfits and what people had been saying. Even if Harry said it didn’t matter, he and Y/N both knew, at the end of the day, they loved when people were happy with their work.  

“Sure,” he bounced to his feet, but Y/N made a hand motion telling him that he could stay seated. He settled back down as she crossed over and sat beside him on his couch.

She was at his house in London today planning his next few appearances that were promotion for the upcoming album, Saturday Night Live was next. Harry had been taking a break from their work until she had come in.

It wasn’t unusual for Y/N to be at his house, they had been working together for months now. First, it had been for his outfits in his music videos that were filmed in late summer and early fall, like Lights up, but also a few other ones. Now, it was clothing for promo appearances, interviews, and listening parties. Next, it would be tour outfits, which she had already started planning, but officially, they hadn’t started discussions yet. Harry had helped her to get a flat closer to his house in London just for her to be able to head over and help with the planning or fitting of his outfits more easily. She also was constantly traveling with him to his appearances, making sure outfits were perfect right before whatever show it was or making last minute adjustments in case either of them decided something wasn’t right.

While Harry was a big guy, his waist was far trimmer than a usual man built to his size, this meant she had to take in a lot of his trousers at the waist. As well, with his shirts and coats, she’d have to take them in or out depending on how Harry wanted the fit to be - either perfectly tight or perfectly oversized. He was particular, but she appreciated his drive for fashion and how he cared for his appearance. Before performances, she often had to take things in or out based on any body fluctuation that had occurred since the initial fitting.

She was looking at her sketchpad that held all of her notes on his clothes - which was different from the lookbook of polaroids - including patches of the actual colors and little Harry figures dressed in what he was going to wear. Right now, she had the pad opened to a page titled “SNL Opener - November 16, 2019”.

“So I was thinking with your opening monologue outfit, it might look better to have a different colored blazer? A matching yellow would be great, but if you did more of a toned down - maybe light tan or beige - blazer with gold embellishments, you’d elevate it to look sophisticated and stylish, rather than just stylish. It’d be exactly like the runway look - which I know you sometimes don’t like, but I think it’s what looks best.”

She ran her finger between two swatches of what she thought would be the better blazer color and the one Harry had originally wanted. He wet his lips and gazed at the page as he thought about what she said. Normally, she liked monochrome on him, but she thought the deep blue underneath a completely yellow suit might wash him out on the stage.

“Yeah,” he pointed to the top beige swatch, “I think I do like this better.” He paused and turned his head to Y/N, looking in her eyes before asking, “Is that all?”

“Er...no,” Y/N ran a hand over her unstyled hair, slightly fluffed by her constant musing of it. She often fiddled with it while she worked, better than biting nails she always said when confronted about her tick. After a sigh Y/N continued, “I was just on the phone with Jane from Gucci and she said that for Look 57 they could only send your technical size, for some reason they can’t custom make it. Meaning, I’ll have to tailor the whole thing to you when it arrives. Is that alright? Or do you want to choose something else?”

She flipped to a page that said “SNL WS.” Harry followed her hands and nodded realizing she was talking about the Gucci suit he wanted to wear for Watermelon Sugar. It was a watermelon’s inside red. When he had found out the suit came in that color, he had danced around the dining table for what Y/N had felt like was an hour, humming the tune of Watermelon Sugar excitedly. Finally, she had coaxed him to sit back down and get back to their other work, which was still picking out clothes.

“No, that’s fine,” Harry shook his head and used his thumb to scratch under his lips absentmindedly, “It really needs to be that color.”

She nodded, she knew what his answer was going to be, but she also knew he still liked to make the final decision.

“Alright, we’ll just have to meet for longer when everything arrives, to tailor that one. Then the rest of them should just be making sure the fit is perfect.”

She rose up from her seat and patted Harry’s shoulder, leaving him to his thoughts, as she went back to finish up the calls with Jane and the designers.

He caught her hand in his before she completely walked away, “Thank you, Y/N.” He was so grateful he had hired someone who was as driven as he was and understood his fashion sense and wanted to help enhance what he was thinking, rather than someone trying to control him or just going along with whatever he said. Neither would be productive or helpful, thankfully Y/N loved her job and cared to do things right.

She grinned before exiting, “H, you’re going to be this century’s style icon if it’s the last thing I do.” He laughed as she walked out of the room, leaning back on the couch to continue his lurking on Instagram.

-

One week later

“I’m here, H! I come bearing Gucci and more!” Y/N said as she shuffled through Harry’s front door, she held a deconstructed rack and a garment bag filled with heavy suits and things. Inside were Harry’s four most important outfits for SNL, some other garments for SNL, and some clothes they had talked about for his upcoming listening sessions later in the month. Y/N needed to check the fit on all of them and begin tailoring the Watermelon Sugar suit. The key Harry had given to Y/N, previously, had let her in, but she assumed he was home. He said he’d be.

When Y/N rounded the corner she found another empty room. Confused, she set down her large items and went to search for Harry. Y/N literally needed him to be here for this part. It was the only real time she actually needed to see him in person - but that was beside the point.

“H?”

She wandered through the different rooms of his home. Normally, Y/N didn’t go into the other rooms, she was always mainly in his lounge area, the dining room, and a little casual office room he had - sometimes the kitchen for water, his bedroom once. Still not finding him, she decided to venture to the furthest door, Harry’s bedroom, she remembered.

Harry groaned at the sound of a knock on his door, he rolled over in his bed. After a few moments of hearing nothing else than his groan, Y/N felt like she had to go in and check on him.

“H, it’s 12:30 and we agreed we’d meet at noon. Are you feeling alright?”

Y/N moved into the room and found a shirtless Harry surrounded by rumpled sheets, clutching at a pillow. He groaned into his pillow again in response. Her legs bent at the edge of the bed and she reached out to smooth some of his chestnut hair out of his face, “What’s wrong?”

He moved his head to allow his eyes to look at her, “‘M so tired, don’t know why. My stomach kind of hurts too…” Y/N looked at him quizzically, before running her hand over his tan forehead once more, this time checking for a fever. “You don’t have a fever. When did you go to sleep? Have you eaten anything today?” With her help, Harry moved into a seated position, head tilted back against the bedpost. He sat silent for a moment before blowing air out of his mouth. “Went to sleep kind of late for me, I guess...Haven’t eaten.”

“Ok, you’re just tired from staying up late, you old man, and you might be a little dehydrated and hungry. Listen, I’ll go make you some food if you get up and prepare yourself for the day. We need to get all your clothes fitted so that I can fix anything before next week.” Y/N was always good at getting Harry back on track when he got distracted - or even out of the station, when he wasn’t in the mood to work on something. She slid from her perch on the bed and walked to almost the edge of the room before Harry called her back.

“Can you pick out my clothes for me?” His soft, tired voice whined. “So hard...and you’ve got the best eye. Pleaseeee,” he pleaded softly.

Rolling her eyes, Y/N sighed and made her way back into his room. Crossing to the door that led to his walk-in closet, she set to work. As silly as he was being, she could never pass up on a chance to pick out an outfit for Harry.

“You’re literally going to be changing the entire time, H, you could have just thrown on sweats,” she called back to him once inside the smaller room. He repeated how she always picked the right thing, even for just around the house. Again, Y/N rolled her eyes at Harry, but she also couldn’t hide the warm smile on her face that was due to his compliment.

She couldn’t believe how dramatic Harry could be sometimes. Right now, he was a lesser form of hungover and he was acting like his life was ending. Y/N had made a note a while ago to never agree to a meeting on the day after any partying. She learned the hard way one particularly terrible Sunday. She had come round his house at a similar time, noon-ish and found Harry dead asleep, backwards in his bed. When she had roused him, his only responses were grumbles and groans. She had to not only pick out his clothes, but also help dress him. Then, after providing water and aspirin, she moved all their work into his bedroom so they could work from there. Harry had proved to be a baby when it came to hangovers.  But, she hadn’t realized he could get like this even without being truly hungover.

After settling on his live aid t-shirt, that Y/N was eternally jealous of, located at the front of his drawer and his favorite corduroy trousers, she walked out and threw them in the direction of his toned, but slumped body. “I will not get you boxers, that is most definitely not in my job description, Boss.” Y/N sent a pointed look in his direction, moving to finally leave the room. While he was technically her boss as her employer, their work relationship was extremely collaborative and it never felt like he was in control of her, she just liked to give him shit for being a drama queen.

“Guess I’ll be going commando. How’s that going to work with me changing in front of you a bunch of times?” He teased right back, taking the clothes you had thrown at him and giving them a onceover. His teasing signalled that he was already feeling better.

Y/N shook her head and walked out of the room, “For the love of God, Harry, please put on underwear before you come out and continuously strip in front of me!”

The words he shouted after that were muffled, but they were something along the lines of how the human body is beautiful and shouldn’t be covered up. Unbelievable. As she set to work on making both of them some lunch, she finally heard Harry begin moving around. They had a lot of work to do as it was and whenever Harry was in a mood, whether it be a good mood or a bad mood, they always seemed to have a hard time focusing.

One night, that could be seen as the poster child for Harry and Y/N’s procrastination, was during the planning for the Adore You music video. Harry was in a super good mood that day and he had brought that energy to their meeting at his house. Y/N was supposed to be fitting him for the various outfits, but Harry, in his mania, ordered an overzealous amount of Chinese food. It took her and Harry hours to even make a dent in the food. And while they passed the time with eating, Harry and Y/N got further and further from their tasks, opting for conversations that included more fun topics than work. They had gossipped about some of the other people they worked with, Harry had begged for “the tea” about some of his other staffers and Y/N was happy to oblige. As much as Y/N would hate to admit it, she loved when they got off of work subjects and talked about how their day’s had been and what has been on their nerves lately. It was a nice way to decompress, it was like hanging out with a friend, except it wasn’t, not really.

Harry shuffled into the kitchen wearing what Y/N had picked out for him. Her smile grew knowing that he hadn’t changed what she’d picked. His confidence in her and her abilities never failed to feel like the biggest compliment.

“Go sit at the dining table, I’ve made us some little sandwiches and then we can decide the order we want to go through the outfits in.”

Before following Y/N’s orders, Harry continued his shuffling around, first to the cabinet for a glass, then to the fridge for water. At the end of the table, she set the plates between the head of the table’s spot and the one to its left. Harry took the side spot, so Y/N was on the end. After a bite of his food, Harry moaned loudly in contentment. This caused an amused look on Y/N’s face, there had been nothing special in his house so she had just made what was possible. This meant that Harry’s satisfaction was a little over the top.

“You’re acting like you haven’t eaten in a week. What did you do last night that got you in such a twist?” Y/N asked as she took a sip of her own glass of water. Harry nibbled at his lower lip after swallowing, trying to understand why he was particularly tired today.

“I guess I forgot to eat properly yesterday and then I went out running. And I stayed up late on the phone with,” he paused, eyes flashing to Y/N and then away again, “someone for SNL.”

Y/N hummed at his words before going back to her own eating. She didn’t understand why he hesitated about telling her he’d been on the phone last night, it especially irked her that he wouldn’t even say with whom. Professionally, it wasn’t really her business, but Harry was never secretive with her. Plus, it seemed to be work related so why was he being so flighty about it.

Moving forward, Harry peppier from eating and simply moving around, the pair set to work. They decided on trying on everything else first and then saving the Watermelon Sugar suit to the end. The other three main pieces for the night fit perfectly, Y/N had to only do minor reworks of certain areas.

“H, I need you to hold still…” Y/N interrupted Harry’s ramblings as she was crouched beside him.

She had to take up the hem on the pant legs so right now she was trying to pin them in the place she and Harry had agreed upon, without messing with the pleats.

“Sorry,” He mumbled, straightening out his back to stand taller.

He stayed quiet for a bit until Y/N popped back up, she looked at her notebook for reference on what she still had to tailor.

“Okay, next, the pants crotch is looking pretty fitted, so I assume you want it taken down a bit,” Y/N said as she got back into her crouching position. “Look in the mirror and tell me where you think letting it out looks best, I don’t have the best vantage point when I’m up this close…” she trailed off, placing her measuring tape directly on top of Harry’s crotch and running it down his leg a ways.

Once done with her first attempt at where she thought was best to let the pants out, she turned her eyes to the mirror that showed Harry in his suit with Y/N on her knees before him. Harry cleared his throat as he looked in the mirror, seeing Y/N with her eyes wide in anticipation in the position she was in made him want to run and hide. Her hands were extremely close to his dick, but it was literally her job, he knew he had to shake the thoughts that were running through his mind.

“Maybe just a bit further up actually, as much as I like the high waist with dropped crotch, I want this suit to have that specifically tailored look,” his hands motioned for Y/N to bring the drop up a ways.

Her hands then brought the measuring tape up, once again grazing over his area. Again, Y/N looked at Harry through the mirror for approval, and this time he gave it and she placed a single pin in the place where the pants would be let out to.

Standing up, Y/N hoped Harry didn’t notice the blush gracing her face. She was a stylist and used to being around naked bodies as well as touching around a man’s crotch when working. But Harry in this suit must have been magic, because she had felt extremely vulnerable on her knees in front of him in it. She had felt flushed the minute he hadn’t liked what she had done initially and she hated that she felt that way for some reason. Beginning to work on the sleeves of the suit set her at ease, Y/N was thankful to no longer be kneeling or in such close proximity to what was under Harry’s pants.

“Anything on your mind of late?” Harry broke the silence.

Y/N hummed with a pin stuck between her lips, folding up the suit jacket’s right sleeve. Plucking it from her mouth after a few silent moments, she said, “Not really, haven’t had time to do much else lately. Always thinking about you,” Y/N flushed as she realized what she had just said. “I mean, thinking about you like about your clothes and when they’re going to arrive and what I need to do about them, not you personally, sorry that came out wrong,” her blush intensified as she rapidly fumbled through her last sentence.

“Ow!”

“Oh my god!”

While Y/N had gotten flustered with her words, she managed to stick the pin she was using straight into Harry’s flesh. She immediately removed the pin from where it had stuck him.

“Oh god, I’m so sorry, H, we’ve got to get this off. I need to make sure you’re not bleeding onto the suit.”

Y/N rushed around to Harry's backside and began slipping off his suit jacket as Harry chuckled and began to unbutton the shirt as carefully as possible.

“‘S alright, Y/N, if there’s any blood on the shirt it’ll blend in, blood is practically the same color.” She glared at him through the mirror and Harry continued to laugh, “That is not funny, H, I shouldn’t have stuck you in the first place.”

“No, no,” Harry hushed Y/N as she began to slip off his shirt from one side to the other, taking off the sleeve on the side she hadn’t poked, “you’ve got so much on your plate with all the planning for the upcoming events. Then you worked yourself up over a little slip.” As Y/N carefully unbuttoned the cuff of the sleeve to try and slip off the shirt with the least amount of blood on it as possible, Harry finished with, “I wouldn’t mind if you were just thinking about me, though, an’ not the clothes.”

This time, Y/N was very in control, not willing to let herself slip up a second time today. She didn’t know how to respond to what Harry had just admitted. It wasn’t like this hasn't happened before. Both of them were guilty of making little comments that made it sound like they were interested in each other in a way that was a little different than professional or friendly. But every time the other person always had the responsibility to shut the idea down or completely blow past what their counter had just said.

“Harry…” She began, it was soft and pleading, like she was saying she couldn’t entertain that idea. Examining his forearm, after pulling the shirt completely away and resting it on a nearby chair, she saw a little spot of blood protruding from the pin prick she had caused. “Where do you keep your bandages?” Y/N decided that it was best to brush past Harry’s words this time and went off to find his first aid kit. Harry stood there, shirtless, staring at the blood on his arm. It really wasn’t a lot and it wouldn’t have done anything to the suit, but Y/N was always so careful and never wanted to ruin any of Harry’s clothes.

On her return, Y/N came upon a shirtless Harry perched on the edge of the table, with one arm crossed and his other - that was bleeding - being held slightly away from his body, as if Harry was afraid to touch it. His posture was slumped so Y/N could see his spine curving beneath his tanned honey-soft skin and his shoulder blades slightly flexed. While most of Harry’s body was covered in tattoos, she noticed how the closest tattoo to his back was the small line drawing of a guitar on the back of his left shoulder. Other than that his smooth back was bare. Y/N found it interesting that Harry had never chosen to ink his back. She jogged lightly back into the room and Harry’s head turned to watch her approach. His bottom lip was caught between his teeth as he regarded her. She noticed he was being particularly quiet, but she had no idea why. Maybe he was still tired.

Y/N set to work on finding the correct tissue, neosporin, and bandage for Harry’s small wound. As she worked on fixing up her mistake, Harry’s eyes followed her movements. Green eyes flickering between her hands on his arm and her own eyes focusing on her task.

“After this, I actually can just head home and finish the rest of the work,” Y/N said as she unpackaged the bandage, “I already know where I need to take in the suit sleeves and the shirt’s sleeves were looking fine. So, I can get out of your hair and you can get to sleep early tonight.” She placed the nude toned bandage over Harry’s arm, she was a little sad to find he didn’t own fun bandages. That was something that she expected from Harry, but she resigned that maybe she didn’t know everything about Harry.

Before Harry could speak, Y/N continued, “Don’t rehearsals for the show start tomorrow? When are you flying to New York?” She ran her hand over the bandage, smoothing it in place. Her hand lingered there as her eyes looked up and met Harry’s. Harry twitched his arm away from Y/N’s touch and scratched his nose slightly.

“Yeah, I’m flying out tomorrow morning. When are you set to fly out?”

“Friday. I’ll get in before the final dress rehearsal and then I’ll be there for the show.” Y/N stepped back and began to rehang the suit jacket and shirt that they had discarded in her haste to not get blood on them.

Then Y/N stood there staring at Harry. He looked at her slightly confused by her doing nothing when she said she was leaving. “Pants, H.” She said finally when she realized he had forgotten he was still wearing the suit pants. “Oh! Sorry,” Harry exclaimed as he began to unbutton and remove the pants he was wearing. He handed her the pants and she exchanged them with his live-aid t shirt. He took it graciously before slipping it on and disguising his toned body beneath it. Then he took his pants from earlier and fully redressed himself.

“Damn!” Y/N said and Harry’s head flipped to watch her as she began to put all of the clothing back in their garment bags and take down the rack.

“What’s wrong?”

“I just pinched myself with the rack, I’m all left feet today.”

“Here,” Harry chuckled as he walked over to help Y/N, “let me help you with all this. Just in the boot of your car, yeah?” Y/N nodded and smiled in appreciation for Harry. He grabbed her keys laying on the table and then took the rack and a garment bag. Even if things sometimes got tense between them, for whatever reason, he was always quick to move past it and be thoughtful and kind in the best ways for Y/N. After shaking her hand out, she grabbed the last garment bags and followed Harry out to her car. Harry shut the back of her car softly and turned to face Y/N, she stood beside her car door, ever so slightly leaning against it. He walked to her side and smiled.

“I’ll see you in a week,” he said before wrapping his arms around Y/N’s much smaller frame. His body was radiating heat and it felt good against Y/N in the crisp night air of London. She pressed into his hold and wrapped her arms around his waist and squeezed him hard. “Less than...Can’t wait to see you make an absolute fool of yourself out there.” Harry protested her tease with a small, “Hey!” but mostly focused on his hands on her back and the way her hair felt especially soft under his chin. Finally, Y/N pulled away, “Kidding! You’ll be amazing and you’ll look killer while doing it.” She winked before opening her car door and driving off. Harry was left with the lingering scent of her perfume and shampoo mingling in his nose.

-

It was the Saturday night, November 16th, 2019.

Harry and Y/N were in his dressing room before the show started. His outfits for the night were lined up, except for his opener one that Y/N had just dressed him in. His first change would be for Light’s Up, then a couple skit outfits that had to be moved elsewhere for quick changes, then the Watermelon Sugar suit, and then finally his end of the show casual look. The opener looked incredible, it’s fit was impeccable and Y/N knew people were going to love it.

She stepped back from Harry to give his whole body a once over, the SNL hairstylist had just blown out his hair and given him a sort of middle part. It definitely looked good and paired with the suit - Y/N could already tell it was going to be a hit by all accounts. Harry grinned back at her, doing a little dance to show just how much he was loving his clothes and how excited he was.

Grabbing the lint roller, Y/N gave the lapels of his suit jacket a once over and then moved it slightly out of the way to roll the big collar of Harry’s shirt and the bits of the body of the shirt that were showing underneath the jacket. Basically, Y/N was lint rolling over Harry’s clothed abs. Apparently, that was a ticklish area for Harry because he began to squirm and giggle under the tool’s touch.

“Seriously, H?”

She smiled as she said it, so excited for Harry that she couldn’t be mad at his relestness.

“Can’t help it. ‘M so giddy. Plus, I’m a wee bit ticklish.”

Y/N gave him a single laugh before removing the lint roller and smoothing over the shirt against his stomach and then over the lapels when she put the jacket back in place. She adjusted the Gucci reader’s she was wearing today, that were more for decoration than anything, but she liked to pretend they made her see better.

“You look smashing, Mr. Styles. Absolutely gorgeous, if I do say so myself.”

“Are you talking to me or the suit?” Harry asked as he flipped to look in the full length mirror in the dressing room.

“Can’t it be both?”

“Sure,” Harry said, he noticed the clock and realized it was his time to get in places. He leaned down and placed a small kiss on Y/N’s cheek, “It’s my time, thank you, Y/N.” She blushed at his words and actions. As he walked out the door, she called after him, “Break a leg, H!” He sent a final air kiss in her direction before completely disappearing.

She looked at the clothes hanging on the rack in the room and palmed over the fabric. Checking the lapels and brushing the lint roller over the, she finally stepped back and was happy with how they looked. When the show was just about to start, she flitted to the part of backstage where she could watch Harry perform. She giggled along to his monologue and grinned whole-heartedly when the crowd would roar with approval. Y/N had heard all of the jokes already because of the dress rehearsal yesterday, but it didn’t matter. Harry was killing it. She also took time to appreciate how good Harry looked in his suit on stage. In front of the lights and all the people, his suit shined brightly with the pops of blue and yellow and the oversized grey-iege jacket. His soft chestnut hair billowed perfectly to frame his forehead as he sipped from the faux martini. Y/N bit her lip to stifle her laugh. The fact that Harry, her boss and friend, was up on the Saturday Night Live stage with pink and blue nails sipping from a faux martini, it was perfect.

When Harry came back for his first performance change Y/N was right there waiting for him.

“Hi, that was really good,” she smiled up at him as he began to take off his coat.

He smiled brightly back at her as he exhaled a hefty breath, “You think so?”

“Yes! C’mon, everyone loved it. You delivered it all perfectly…” she took over undoing the buttons on the shirt because Harry was moving too slowly. “I’m in a man band now…” Y/N mumbled under her breath before chuckling.

“Did you just imitate my accent?” Harry said, now pulling off his sleeves.

Y/N moved around his back to take the shirt to hang and grab his Lights Up outfit. They worked like a well-oiled machine together, constantly taking over roles to get things done more efficiently, but never stepping on each other’s toes.

“Nope,” she winked before handing him the black sequin jumpsuit and exchanging it for his yellow pants. After rehanging the pants and bringing over Harry’s different set of boots, Y/N said, “Y’know, I’d have to say that your hair is giving your suit a run for its money.” She placed the shoes on the table beside Harry and began to fix into the place different parts of the jumpsuit, moving to zip up the back and then coming to the front to smooth it.

“What do you mean?” Harry looked in the mirror and delicately touched the edges of his hair, considering Y/N’s statement.

“No one ever really sees it how it is, nicely blown out but not too much product so it falls to frame your face. What’d you tell the hair person you wanted?” Y/N stepped back to allow Harry to change his boots from one Gucci pair to another, like he did with most of his wardrobe.

“Just told them to make me look mature. You think it looks good?” He looked up at Y/N when he asked the question.

“Think it looks sexy, that’s what I’m saying, no one’s gonna be able to focus on your clothes with how good your hair looks.”

“Ah,” he deftly runs his hands down his suit as he looks in the mirror.

Y/N just stares at Harry, checking him over one more time. She wasn’t lying about his hair, it was sexy and she wanted to run her hands through it to feel how soft it was. In a complete friend way of course.

“I like it…”

“It looks like you just rolled out of bed, but the bed was made of angel feathers.”

Harry laughed at Y/N’s description. He shifted his body to face her more and moved closer to her in the process.

“Alright, you should probably get back out there,” Y/N closes the gap between them and adjusts the chain of his jade and silver crosses and brushes over his broad shoulders.

They’re professional touches, but her movements hold an undercurrent of intimacy that neither of them realize. If anyone had been looking on, they would see how Y/N’s fingers delicately caressed Harry’s skin right before she cradled the pendants to move them in place. They would also see Harry instinctively lean forward into her touch and breathe slightly deeper to take in her scent. When she brushes over his shoulders, he straightens up at the touch and shows he’s ready to get back out there. It’s as if she prepared him to go.

Harry sings Lights Up and the crowd loves it. Sarah kills her drumming and Mitch eats up lead guitar. The backup singers bring out a different tone to the song. It is all around an amazing performance.

As Y/N clapped along with the crowd from backstage, Aidy Bryant approaches her.

“You’re Harry’s stylist, right?”

Y/N turns her head at the woman next to her, “Yeah?”

Aidy smiles, eyes slightly gleaming, “Well, you’re wonderful at your job.” As Y/N is about to thank her, Aidy continues, “And Harry knows that too, he talked about you all week. We all thought you were his girlfriend at first.”

Y/N laughed lightly and had to keep herself from letting her jaw drop at Aidy’s words. She even choked a bit on her own spit and had to cough slightly before even being able to think of a response, “Well, um, yeah...no, H, Harry is just my employer and...friend. No dating, we just get along well. Which is important since we spend a lot of time together - for work of course!”

Aidy smiled sweetly at Y/N, “Yeah, Harry explained that when Beck asked him how long you’d been together. At first he had said a couple months and then said ‘wait, Y/N is just my stylist, we’ve been working together for a couple months’ and then we all felt really dumb.”

“Don’t feel dumb,” Y/N reassured her, unsure why she was actually continuing this conversation, “He loves to talk about clothes and that’s where I fit in to his life, so I’m sure my name would come up a fair bit. Was that it?”

“Yeah I guess, but-” Aidy began to say more, but Y/N cut her off.

“Oh gosh, I’m sorry, but Harry’s finished and I’ve got to go help him change for his next song.”

Aidy was left in Y/N’s wake, chuckling to herself, fully reassured about the reason that they had all thought Harry had been dating Y/N. Because they already acted like a couple. And they were both helplessly in love with one another and neither of them knew.

The rest of the show went off without a hitch. Harry continued to wow the crowd and Y/N sent him off from his dressing room always looking fabulous. Just as he was about to walk back on stage for his final farewell, Y/N noticed a tiny string on his trousers zipper. Unable to stop Harry and unable to grab at the string without looking odd, she had to let him walk on stage with it. It wasn’t actually a big deal, but Y/N sighed in annoyance because she knew that string was going to bug her for the rest of the night.

“Treat People With Kindness!” Harry finishes off his farewell.

Applause begins to sound and the cast is out front hugging and chatting, while Y/N is watching from the side still fixated on the string on Harry’s pants, now simply dangling. Finally, they begin to clear the stage because it’s time for the after party. Y/N knew there was no stealing Harry away to fix the problem that was now fixated in her mind. Every cast and crew member was trying to talk to him, congratulating him, hugging him, anything to spend time with the incredible man. Y/N couldn’t blame them, but she also wanted to be able to go some place quiet and debrief with Harry about his outfits. She wanted to look up what people were saying about his clothes and discuss the critiques with Harry. She also wanted to start discussing what was coming next with Harry. But most of all, she just wanted to hang out with Harry.

What Y/N wanted wasn’t going to happen anytime soon, which she knew, but it still only grew her annoyance with that string. If only she could get it off of him, maybe then her mind would be able to relax a little.

She meandered backstage, resigned she wouldn’t be talking to Harry for a while. There she went to find the band’s dressing room, knowing she would find Mitch or Sarah who she’d be happy to talk to. They weren’t ones for the spotlight and no one ever really seemed to want to brownnose with them at events like this. Y/N had met them a few times.

The first was when Harry had asked Y/N to meet him in the studio in mid July, Mitch and Sarah had both been there helping Harry finish up something for the album. Y/N never asked what, she liked music quite a bit, but when it came to the technical part of it, it went completely over her head. Harry had introduced them both and they seemed lovely. After that, she had seen them around for an event or two of Harry’s. It wasn’t much, but it was more than any of the other people around right now.

Just as she was about to knock on the door it swung open, revealing Harry’s entire backing band. “Hey,” Y/N said sheepishly, “Harry’s being fawned over by the masses and I don’t actually know anyone else here. Is it alright if I hang out with you all at this after party? I doubt there’s going to be anyone really dying to meet the stylist.”

She smoothed her own clothes as she spoke. Y/N wanted to look professional tonight because sometimes when she was dressed in more fun or “young” clothes she got mistaken for someone who had snuck in. The only thing that got people to not question her authority to be where she was, was a card that read ‘staff’ that she would clip onto whatever she was wearing at places like this. Tonight, she chose a pair of purple plaid pants, a sleek lilac tank underneath a cream knit shawl, and cream Gucci mules.  Ever since Harry took an interest in Y/N’s pearl necklace, she had largely stopped wearing hers because she hoped never to be photographed matching with him. However, she had known the pearls would have completed the look, even putting them on in her hotel room, twisting a pearl in her hand as she looked in the mirror, and then taking the necklace off again and settling on a different silver necklace instead. The ‘staff’ card was clipped to her pants pocket tonight.

“Of course!” Sarah said as the band began to file out of the room, “You might want to take your tag off now, though, you’re done working for the night.”

Her laughter rang sweetly through Y/N’s ears and she smiled back before removing her identifying card. She hated the piece of plastic and was glad to take it off, it never went with her outfits, but she had gotten tired of taking out her business card every time someone asked what she was doing. Y/N was sure that during the tour she’d be fine without it, but as Harry’s show appearances were beginning to ramp up she knew it would be helpful to have.

“Thanks...you all were amazing out there tonight. Second time on the SNL stage right?”

The group of you began to walk in the direction of where the after party was being held. Mitch piped up, “Thanks. Yeah, I love their box stage setup, it’s pretty cool.” Y/N was happy that she had people who were easy to talk to so that she wouldn’t be alone tonight.

Arriving in the room of the party, they were all quick to grab the alcohol that was being provided at the pop up bar. Y/N wasn’t normally a fan of drinking at events like these, mainly because she was not usually invited to this part of the night and when she was she wanted to be alert. But she figured there wasn’t much else to do so she took a hearty sip of the champagne. It was a little sweet, her face scrunched.

“Too sweet?” Mitch questioned when he saw Y/N’s face.

“Just a little for my taste.”

“Harry’s not going to be drinking tonight then. So particular about his alcohol,” Mitch continued.

Y/N laughed, “Well I’m glad, then I don’t have to deal with him being a baby about his hangover tomorrow.”

Mitch quirked an eyebrow at Y/N’s statement. Sarah and the others in the band had dispersed to mingle with the SNL party goers, leaving Mitch and Y/N to their conversation.

Realizing what she said could be seen as slightly weird out of context, Y/N quickly started again, “because I’m supposed to go shopping with Harry tomorrow. He wanted to go to Gucci and a couple other stores here before flying to LA. I’m going back to London until the listening parties, so we need to figure out the finishing touches for those and..” Y/N trailed off trying to remember which looks weren’t completed yet for the next few shows, Mitch waited patiently, “a few of the suits for the Late Late Show. He’s not happy with one of them so we might switch it. But anyway, you know how he is with a hangover. Proper child.”

Mitch threw his head back in laughter at Y/N’s serious look that she gave him. “Yeah, he can be...a lot. I meant to tell you, Harry looked great tonight. All of the clothes were fantastic,” Mitch added.

He was kind and Y/N appreciated him sticking with her. The two of them had rested themselves against a wall near the bar, sipping their champagne and enjoying each other’s company.

“Thank you.”

Mitch opened his mouth to say something else, but Heidi Gardener, another SNL member interrupted.

“Y/N, right!?”

Y/N and Mitch both turn to her, equally taken aback by the sudden burst of energy from this person they didn’t really know. Y/N nodded.

“Oh my gosh! You have to tell me where you got the jacket Harry is wearing!”

Heidi even goes as far to point in Harry’s direction. Y/N knows what she’s talking about, but her eyes still wander to where she pointed. Harry stood in a clump of people, surrounded by Ben Winston, James Corden, and the Gerbers who had all come to watch. She sighed as she watched his eyes shine as he laughed with a smile on his face. She hoped that by now the string had fallen off his pants by now, if not she was going to kick herself later.

“Oh, it’s Bode,” Y/N’s eyes coming back to meet Heidi’s happy face, “but it’s custom made from a vintage blanket. There’s only two that exist.”

Y/N and Mitch watched as Heidi’s face dropped.

“And I’m pretty sure the designer owns the other one,” Y/N added, “Sorry.”

Heidi smiles and jokes, “Know any ways I could possibly get Harry to give me his?”

“He loves that coat. I have no idea what you could possibly do to convince him he didn’t need it anymore.”

“Sex, probably,” Mitch says under his breath.

Heidi doesn’t catch it as she walks back off and Y/N turns to swat him with her free hand.  

“What? He always gives away his clothes to girl’s he has crushes on.” Y/N rolls her eyes at Mitch’s words.

“Probably best if you don’t inform the masses about that,” a new voice says.

Unbeknownst to Mitch and Y/N, Harry had broken away from his entourage to steal a few minutes with his two friends, his best friends if he was being honest. They laugh together as he wraps his arms around their shoulders and pulls them both into his chest. Y/N feels the warmth radiating from Harry’s body as she snuggles into his side. Her hand wraps under his jacket and around his waist to squeeze right about his hip bone. His face is gleaming with a small sheen of sweat, but his smile is so big she barely notices his perspiration as he looks down at her.

“Heard you were talkin’ shit?”

Mitch quips, “Us? Never.”

Harry scoffs, “Come off it!”

When he releases Y/N and Mitch from his grasp, Mitch straightens up while Y/N’s eyes immediately go down to Harry’s crotch. She’s not paying attention to their conversation as she tries to make out in the dim light whether the string is gone or not. The men realize she’s not listening and they both follow her gaze.

Confused, Harry asks, “Y/N, any particular reason you’re staring at my dick?”

Her head shoots up, eyes wide and cheeks flushed from embarrassment.

“I wasn’t!”

Mitch laughs and decides he wants another glass of champagne right then, mumbling something about how that was his cue. Harry smiles, knowing she wasn’t doing what he had said, but still intrigued to know what was going on in her mind.

“You had a string right on your zipper and it’s been bugging me since you went out for your outro. This is the first time I’ve seen you on your own and I couldn't exactly go up to you in a random crowd and grab at your crotch. But now I can’t see in this light…” Y/N bit at her lower lip and furrowed her brow still trying to see if the string was there.

“Have you really been thinking about it this whole time?” Harry asked, slightly concerned.

“Yes...I know it doesn’t matter, but I just want your clothes to look perfect.”

Harry takes a deep breath as he makes a small smile at Y/N. Then he brushes over the front of his pants, hoping he removes the string if it's still attached to him. “There, I’m sure it’s gone now. I’m sorry you had to worry about that. Just know everyone I’ve talked to has been raving about the clothes.” He placed his ring-clad hand on Y/N’s upper arm and squeezed it.

“You did an amazing job,” Y/N said.

Harry pulls her into his chest one more time. This time without Mitch so both of Harry’s arms go around her shoulders and both of hers go around his slender waist. Again her hands disappear under his coat and thumb over his warm white t-shirt, her face resting on his chest right next to the word ‘Sex’. His arms tighten around her back as they rest there for a while. Y/N always has to make herself pull away, knowing that Harry will stay there for as long as he can - in anyone’s embrace - and remembering they’re in a public setting, she didn’t want anyone to assume things, even if she had already been made aware that people had.

“We’ll debrief more later tonight, yeah? The champagne is terrible so I won’t be drinking,” Harry said.

Y/N laughed under her breath as she smiled at his words. Mitch and her knew Harry too well. She nodded about getting together later, “Alright. Get back to your fan club.” Harry narrowed her eyes at her words, not sure if she was trying to sound sarcastic or not.

-

Hey, I’m back at the hotel. Just let me know when you want to debrief :) x

Y/N texted Harry the minute she got back to the hotel, she had no idea if he had left before her or was still at the after party. All she knew was that it was late and she was starting to get tired. Still, it was important for them to talk about their plans for tomorrow and she also really wanted to just be with him alone. Whenever they would debrief after big events Harry and Y/N would laugh at all the outrageous stuff they had seen go on throughout the night.

When she was still a freelance stylist she had helped Harry to plan his Camp outfit at the Met Gala. That night, they never even went to bed and had to debrief about the clothes the next afternoon over tea at the Palace. Both her and Harry were recovering from their exhaustion and nursing equally terrible hangovers. But there they were, sitting in the center of the dining area of the hotel, being served some of the nicest tea and sandwiches Y/N had ever had. It was amazing. Y/N had never felt that rich in her life before and Harry had told her the craziest stories about the most famous people in attendance. It was almost unbelievable what these people would reveal to Harry and Y/N was happy to listen to all of it, promising to never tell anyone else. That outing was probably the first time Harry realized he really liked Y/N and wanted to work more closely with her.

While tonight wasn’t quite as wild as the Met Gala had been, Y/N was still excited to hear any funny stories Harry might have in addition to their clothing talk. They really hadn’t had much time to chat since she had gotten to New York yesterday so it would be nice to just be alone together. Even if Y/N chalked their debriefs up to ‘shop talk’, she was always very excited for them.

As she reached her hotel room door, her phone buzzed with a message from Harry.

I’m still out, but should be heading back soon. Up to you if you want to wait up or we can just debrief in the morning while we shop. x H  

Y/N sighed at the message, she wanted to wait up and debrief before tomorrow, if not for alone time with Harry but professionally for being able to plan out their shopping tomorrow. Where Harry was carefree, Y/N was meticulous and planned out. She liked to have fun, but she knew when she had to get her work done, even when Harry was off in his own mind. Their work styles mostly coincided, Harry could be serious and focused, too, but often when he was surrounded by all his famous friends he had a hard time saying ‘no’ to whatever came up. So Y/N knew that Harry’s definition of ‘soon’ could range from actually soon to almost dawn. She really hoped he actually meant soon, so she shot him a text saying:

Just knock on my room and if I open it we can debrief lol x

Harry smiled down at his phone when Y/N’s text came through, slightly chuckling before double tapping and placing a heart reaction of her text. Then he was pulled into the limo that one of his friend’s had gotten them and was handed a flute of champagne.

Back at the hotel, Y/N threw her phone on the bed and decided to change and simply settle in for the night. If Harry made it back, he made it back and if he didn’t she’d wake up well rested.

Maybe thirty minutes into scrolling on her phone, Y/N heard a rough knock on her door. She was actually quite surprised that Harry had indeed been back soon. Rising from her snuggled place in the bed, she shifted around her night clothes and padded to her door. There stood, rather hung, a slightly disheveled Harry. His hair was whipped into disaster, something was smudged on his face, and she noticed a stain on his t-shirt that hadn’t been there the last time she’d been with him.

He slurred her name as he stumbled through the doorway. Y/N closed her eyes and sighed in exasperation. She was in awe that somehow Harry hadn’t gotten off his ass in the past hour and a half.

“What happened to not drinking tonight?”

She walked beside him and helped shove him into a sitting position on her bed. He flapped his arms, chaotically trying to get his plaid jacket off. Throwing her phone in the direction of her pillow, she moved to help Harry with his jacket. After quite a bit of strugglings, Y/N finally got the Bode jacket off of him successfully and threw it onto the nearby chair. Sighing, she settled beside him.

“So, Harry, care to explain?”

“Hi, Y/N…” He swayed slightly, attempting to face Y/N more. She threw out a hand to his shoulder, gripping him tightly to try and steady him.

“We went in this limousine, and they had champagne - good champagne - and I drank a bottle or so pretty quickly.”

“Or so? Oh Harry...I mean you’re free to make your own choices, but I don’t know if this was one of your best.”

“Wasn’t...wasn’t my idea. I was planning on just going back to the hotel. Then James convinced me to come out for a bit. Then the champagne was looking good so I went for it.”

“Like I said, you can make your own choices,” she patted his arm and went to the en suite bathroom to wet a washcloth to clean off his face.

“So, is it champagne on your shirt or am I going to have to go through hell to get the stain out?” She called.

Harry groaned and leaned back on the bed, fingering at the crisp white sheets. “Champagne,” he finally muttered as Y/N reappeared into the dim room, only the outside world and the light in the bathroom lighting this area.

“And on the face?”

She climbed onto the bed and kneeled beside Harry’s prone body, beginning to swipe at the smudge on his face. He tilted his head to face her, bringing the cheek with the dirt to lay facing perfectly up. His jawline showed perfectly and she felt the strength that laid beneath the skin she was washing.

His eyes flitted up to her face, trying to stop the spins he was currently experiencing. He hadn’t thought he was that drunk until he had been required to find his way up to their floor on his own.

“Lipstick?”

She sighed, running the washcloth over his cheek once more, and tried to push the image of some woman (or man who wore lipstick, she guessed) with her lips all over Harry’s face. She didn’t want to know who it was or why it was. It was too hard, especially after the day of people asking her about Harry and her relationship and insinuating things about him and his romantic life. She just liked to keep the words Harry and romance apart as much as possible, it made her life easier that way.

“It was only from-”

“It’s ok, Harry, I don’t need to know who you were…” She stopped herself, not even wanting to say ‘kissing’ or ‘snogging’ or even worse ‘shagging’. Adults were human beings and they could do a lot in an hour and a half. And again, she didn’t want to know.

“You keep doing that. Are you mad at me?”

“I’m sorry?”

“Calling me Harry, not ‘H’. Is it because you’re mad at me?”

“No,” she sighed, shifting to sit more casually, “No, I’m not mad at you. I just wasn’t expecting you to show up at my door like this. I try not to worry about you, but then when you show up like this, it kind of affirms I had reason to be concerned.”

She took a hand and smoothed over Harry’s tousled hair, he rolled his head back to face the ceiling. “Like I said, you’re an adult, capable of making his own decisions. And, I am just your stylist. I’m just glad you made it up here and knocked on my door. Probably would have given someone else a fright.”

He laughed, starting to sober up as the spinning in the room stopped. Her hands on his face and hair were soothing and sobering.

“Thank you for caring about me, love. And going beyond being just my stylist, you’re my friend Y/N.”

His eyes flickered shut and Y/N stared at his soothed features. His words were still slurred and she was sure the use of love was just his britishness slipping through his drunken state. The part about being more than a stylist, she tried to push it away, telling herself not to read more into it than her heart would like to. Even though he said she was a friend as well as a stylist and not anything more, it still sent so much joy through her body. He didn’t just see her as a work colleague and he had said it. But in his inebriated state, Y/N didn’t want to take everything he said as gospel.

She moved him up the bed with a little bit of his sleepy self’s help into a more comfortable position. It was pretty late now and she wasn’t going to kick him out. It would have been rude and unkind and that were two things Y/N rarely was. She went and grabbed the extra blanket from the cabinet and draped it over Harry’s large body for extra warmth since he refused to get under the covers. She also slipped off his boots and stained shirt per his request before getting into the other side of the bed and falling asleep.

-

She awoke to a shifting body beside her and she sat up confused as to who it could be. Quickly, Harry showing up drunk at her door came flooding back and she turned to look at the groaning Harry beside her. His arm was thrown over his face as he moaned, just waking up as well and experiencing the first bits of his hangover. This was going to be a long day.

“Hullo,” his voice was especially low, groggy and hoarse from the night before. He peaked over at her from behind the crook of his elbow. His eyelids barely open and his eyelashes weighing them down so much so that she could barely see his sleepy jade eyes.

“Good morning, H. Have a nice rest?” Y/N sat up and began to ready herself for the day, rummaging through her suitcase for an outfit and moving about the room.

Harry’s arms went to his sides as he worked to sit up, eyes following her figure as she moved around, seemingly not groggy very much unlike him. “Erm...I’m sorry for showing up pissed.”

“S’fine, H. Just glad you didn’t end up in a ditch or someone’s bed - someone’s that you might regret…” She barely regards him, throwing a single glance his way before shuffling to the bathroom to change. She knows they’ll be photographed today, it’s almost inevitable right now. Everyone knows Harry is in New York and people are buzzing to see him after his performance last night. She slips on the 70s inspired dress, the v-neck and long sleeves settling perfectly on her frame, it hugs her curves and lands around mid-thigh. Rolling on the bold mustard yellow tights and strapping up the brown leather mary jane heels, she looks herself over in the mirror. She then tries to tame her hair and do the rest of her routine, knowing she needed to get on with the day, shopping first and flying home second. Making sure Harry was okay was also on that list, but she couldn’t pretend like she wasn’t a little disappointed in him after last night.

When she returns, Harry is sitting with his legs hanging off the edge of the bed, head hanging as he’s hunched over himself. “C’mon, you gotta get going, kid. Lots to do today.” She’s pacing over to Harry’s deflated figure to pick him up and prompt him to get moving. When she arrives by his side his head lifts and his now more awake eyes stare up at her.

“I’m sorry for yesterday, really. I mean it.”  

“I told you already. It’s fine.”

“It’s not - or it wasn’t. You called me ‘Harry’ last night. I don’t think I’ve heard you call me that to my face since we started working together. I took your answer last night because I was swimming in it, but now, thinking about it. I know you were upset.”

She huffs, taking a seat beside Harry on the bed, choosing to not look at him, slightly confused why she had been so upset and why he was pushing it. “Ok, yeah I was annoyed, but I was also genuinely worried. I didn’t know you could physically get that drunk in that small amount of time. And then you show up at my door with somebody else’s…” Y/N falters, catching her slip up and deciding to fix her gaze on her shoes and their intricate design built into the leather.

“You’re upset that I had lipstick on me?” He’s trying to meet Y/N’s gaze, but her eyes are really interested in her shoes. His tone is confused, he’s trying to understand what’s going on in her mind.

She scoffs, risking a glance to Harry but then returns quickly back to her dress this time. “Please...it was just inconvenient for me, okay? Thought we were going to debrief and stayed up late for you. Then I had to take care of you after you hung out with your famous pals and I had barely even seen you all day. Felt a bit used.”

Harry shifted in the bed, turning to face her by tucking one leg beneath him. He places a hand on hers that was placed on the end of her dress. Her eyes finally meet with his and she feels her breath slightly catch in her throat. His eyes are piercing, his gaze intense, maybe even a tinge of anger. “Y/N, I would never have come to your room if I even had an inkling that this would be how you’d interpret it . Even though I was drunk, I wanted to see you, that’s why I came up here, because I wanted to be with my friend, one of my best friends, not because I just needed some pushover to care for me.”

She sighs, feeling icky still about the whole situation. She sometimes found herself in fights that she never intended, she wished she hadn’t said anything at all. But she also knew that wasn’t healthy either. Flipping her hand, she intertwines her fingers with Harry’s and smiles for the first time that morning. His expression softens at it. “Look, I’m sorry too, H. It honestly wasn’t that big of a deal, but I appreciate that you’re such a great guy and boss to want to truly apologize and make sure I’m comfortable and happy… Oh, and I promise I’ll never call you anything but H from here on out - unless you tell me otherwise.”

He cackles unabashedly at her words, before suddenly clutching at his temple with his free hand. “Fuckin’ hangover,” he mumbles. She smiles and stands up, beginning to throw his shirt and shoes from the end of the bed at him, “You need to get ready. Go pop some advil or whatever. My flights at 5 so we haven’t got all day, H.”

“There she is,” Harry grins, beginning to put back on the stained ‘Sex’ shirt.

As he hustles out of the room, shoes in hand, she calls to him one last request, “When you’re in fresh clothes make sure you bring me that stained shirt. Gonna have to spot clean it when I’m back in London!”

“Of course! And we’ll debrief as we shop, yeah?”

“Yes!”

The two of them were shouting to each other as the door continued to close on them. Chuckling to herself, she begins to pack up her room, knowing she had to check out before they left. Her spirits already lifted, she doesn’t even notice as she throws Harry’s forgotten Bode jacket into her suitcase with some other items that had been on her chair. She wouldn’t notice it until she was back in London unpacking from the trip.

Shutting the case, she springs back up from her crouched position and walks to look in the full length mirror again. Her fingers run the length of her dress, leafing over the slightly darker brown embroidered flowers that were woven into the tan fabric. She squints as she turns sideways and pops a heel up behind her. It looks good, but something is missing. Rummaging through her carry-on she pulls out her old butterfly bandana she used as a head scarf and begins to fix it into place on her head. Placing large sunglasses on the bridge of her nose, she feels like the look is complete and gives herself some poses in the mirror; a peace sign, an air kiss, a Marilyn Monroe. She laughs at herself.

A knock on the door shakes her from her childish fun. Straightening up, Y/N saunters over to the door, swinging it open with ease. “H?”

“You ready?” Harry stands in a fresh pair of Marni trousers paired with a striped orange and mauve Marni sweater. He, like Y/N, had this thing about wearing the brand you planned to shop at. He didn’t always stick to his rule, but he usually didn’t like to wear Gucci when he shopped at Gucci.

“Yeah, just need to check out and drop my baggage at the front to be held for later.” Y/N slips through the door and notes how his outfit compliments hers. She wouldn’t mention it, but it's something to think about since he had known what she was wearing. She wasn’t sure why she noticed things like that, if asked, her answer would probably be that it was the stylist in her, just her job.

-

Stepping out of a black town car on the side street next to Gucci to go in the side entrance would never get old for Y/N. She had never really enjoyed the idea of fame, but from a young age she had known she wanted to be able to afford the finer things in life. Going into the Gucci store now, especially with Harry, was like going to the candy store once you’re a grown up and can buy whatever you want rather than what your parents will allow you to.

Today, Harry and Y/N didn’t have as much time as they would usually like to spend in the store, but they were just happy to be doing what they loved. Y/N had been ecstatic to find out Harry found shopping to be an essential part of his life and that he liked to do his outfit shopping in person rather than online. Trying on clothes and picking out things you liked just was so much more fulfilling when you were in the physical store. Then make that all happen with Harry Styles as the buyer, then it was a real party. The stores liked to pull out their Champagne and clear the store to allow him privacy, specifically when it was for clothes for projects under wraps. In the beginning of her employment, it was only ever Harry who would do the trying on of clothes, but as the two of them got acquainted and comfortable with each other, she found herself trying things Harry would pick out for her. At first, she would veto some items saying they were too expensive for her, but eventually she learned that her new salary covered whatever it was. She had always enjoyed designer labels and choosing to be a stylist meant she had nice clothes, but only working for Harry had caused her closet to double in size and triple in value.

“So we are looking for some trousers today,” she tells the worker at the store, reminding them of what she had already called ahead about. The employee nods and proceeds to lead them into the room where they had laid out an assortment of pants for Harry to pick from.

“What do you think of these?” Harry walks out and strikes a pose, popping one of his hips to the side and his hands on his hips. The pants strain around his thighs, but fit practically perfectly everywhere else. His slim waist is perfectly encircled by the fabric and he’s decided the sweater he was wearing didn’t match them and he’d rather go shirtless. This choice technically should allow her to solely focus on the pants, but it actually makes her focus that much more diverted. She makes a spinning motion with her pointer finger as she purses her lips. He takes a quick spin and the boot cut slightly flares with his movement. The pants are a dark brown with a single plaid crossing in a lighter brown. They are only lightly flared, which she prefered to the extreme flare that some of Harry’s suits had. She narrows her eyes at the pants to keep her gaze from shifting to the taut muscles of Harry’s arms and torso or the dark ink that licked over his skin in the beautiful designs of his choice.

“They’re nice,” she pulls up a picture of the top part of the outfit he was planning on wearing, “Do you think they match with this though?” Harry walks over to her seated position and bends to look at her phone. His skin radiates heat and the smell of his cologne and she sniffles slightly with her sensitive nose. His eyes flicker to her face when he notices her little noise, but returns to looking at the phone when she doesn’t spare him a glance. She felt his gaze on her, but couldn’t bring herself to look from the phone. She knew his proximity would make it even harder for her to keep her eyes off his naked torso. The expensive smell of Harry mixed with the expensive smell of the store was a lot to handle.

“Yeah...no. You think they’re not right,” she widens her eyes at Harry’s words when he pulls away. He turns to the mirror in the open dressing room and fiddles with the waistline of the pants. “I agree,” he finishes before stalking back into the room and shutting the heavy velvet curtain that worked as the door to it.

He tries on five more pairs of trousers and finally settles on two pairs for the two different listening parties. A heavier, wool-tweed pair that was dark brown and then a lighter brown tweed pair. He was still in the lighter pants as he stared into the mirror. He beckoned to Y/N, and she quickly set down the flute of Champagne she had been sipping at lazily as he admired himself.

“Is it possible for you to take it in a bit more,” he says in a hushed tone to her, not wanting the workers to overhear. They were helpful but if they overheard they would wait for the store to tailor the trousers and he preferred for Y/N to do it. He rubs at the waistline again and she moves closer, her hands going to his sides. Her fingertips graze the naked skin above the trousers and Harry shivers at the coldness of the new touch. She ghosts softly over the waistline herself and smooths the fabric until she’s pinching a small amount on each side. She hums, pulling back from Harry and looking at the fit of them now, examining whether that makes them look better.

Then she nods and smiles up at Harry, “Ever the slender waist,” he grins right back as she admires him. She knew how much he liked praise and she was happy to give it to him, especially when he was so deserving. “I’d say size down, but then your thighs and bum might strain the fabric too much.” His face turns to a smirk as she blushes at her words. She releases the fabric and takes a hand to pat Harry’s smooth chest before walking back to her seat on the lovely couch.

“You sure you don’t want to try anything on, Y/N? Saw some killer boots when we walked in that screamed you.” Harry calls from behind the curtain, presumably getting redressed. Her laugh comes through the curtain slightly muffled, yet still a sweet melody in Harry’s ears.

“Definitely not now, we’re leaving any minute. Plus, I’ve got plenty of Gucci boots, don’t even show me them or I’ll be tempted.”

His laughter rings through the curtains, loud and unrestrained. She smiles to herself, unable to discourage the pleasure that weaves through her at the sound. His presence in all the different ways she experienced it was instantly comforting.

-

When she arrives back to her London flat, she practically flops on her couch once she’s inside the door. Her luggage forgotten at the door, as she shrugs off her coat. It was around 7 am because she had chosen to take the red eye for some reason. She groaned as she thought about the day ahead of her. Even though Harry was halfway across the globe, she still had plenty of work to do. She had to finalize the outfits for the listening parties now that they had the pants to complete the looks. Then she had to start thinking about Harry’s December appearances. She had sent ahead his Late Late outfits that he had needed in Los Angeles for the pre-filming, but she still had to deal with the outfits for the live part of the show.

Today, she was set to go pick up the other pieces needed for the listening parties as well as items for the Graham Norton Show and Jingle Ball. She was most excited for her travels because that meant looking at brand new clothes that were perfect and gorgeous. She also knew she needed to spot clean Harry’s shirt, which didn’t spark as much joy in her tired mind.

The idea of the shirt staining with alcohol was what brought her out of her snuggling with her comfy couch. Sure, it couldn’t get that bad, but still she was a worrier and it would pain her if the iconic shirt got ruined. She padded back over to her luggage, now without her jacket or shoes. Her major suitcase got flipped on its side and she began to unzip it. It came open easily seeing as it was stuffed with her clothes and various items. She had to rummage a minute for Harry’s shirt that seemed to have run away inside the bag. Finally, the large white shirt made itself known and she grasped it happily.

As she looked over the stain near the collar of the shirt, her eyes traveled to a piece of fabric peeking out of her suitcase. It was a familiar blue, cream and white. A specific fabric she would never misplace, would never not recognize. Harry’s plaid Bode jacket. It was iconic and she loved it, but why did she have it in her suitcase. She definitely didn’t mean to have it, it’s genuinely just one of Harry’s jackets so it wouldn’t make sense for her to bring it back with the show's wardrobe. She tries to think back to yesterday, when she was still in New York. Thinking about why she would have it, she places the memories of Harry coming to her room, taking off his coat, and accidentally leaving it in her room all fit together. She must have just absentmindedly placed it in her suitcase without even realizing. She’s sure Harry wouldn’t mind, she’d shoot him a text, though, to tell him she had it. So he wouldn’t worry about whether he’d lost it or not.

When she gets ready for the day, she finds herself being drawn to blue and cream. Her outfit is understated and she just knows the jacket would finish the look. She loved that jacket and now that she had it, would it be a big deal if she wore it out. She figured it was fine. After she grabbed her purse, keys, and other essentials, she slipped on the coat. Harry was very broad shouldered and it hung oversized on her. She loved the look and snapped a selfie in the mirror before she headed out. While it felt a little narcissistic to constantly take photos of herself, she felt like as a stylist it was important to document her looks just as much as she documented her clients.

What she didn’t think about is just how much the rest of the world liked to document her client and those who were seen with her client. She didn’t think about how she had just been seen with Harry yesterday. That thought didn’t even cross her mind as she walked around the streets of London picking up her work. As she saw some photographers out and about (whom she assumed were for famous celebrities, not her). How it might seem with her wearing the Bode jacket Harry had worn on SNL two nights ago. The Bode jacket that there were only two of.

None of it crossed her mind. Not until it was the end of the day and she had a whole slew of texts from Harry’s manager. A few from Harry, and others but the other fifteen were solely from Jeff. She was a bad texter so as she walked into her flat and finally looked at her phone after putting down all of her garment bags her eyes went wide.

Please tell me you’re not out in London right now!

What are you wearing??

That cannot be Harry’s jacket Y/N

Seriously?

Please call me.

CALL ME. NOW.

      - All from Jeff.

She grimaced. The others from her friends including Harry would have to be ignored right now. Even if Harry was her boss, Jeff was who she had to deal with when it came to public appearances and it didn’t seem like she could get around this one. Normally, she never had to deal with him, but it seems today wasn’t normal.

- 

part 2

[dreamescapeswriting]

Cabin In The Woods [M] ~ BC [Request]

WORD COUNT: 4K

GENRE: SMUT, non idol au

PAIRING: Chan x Fem!Reader

A/N: I had to name the camp this there was no other wayyyyyy Hope you like it!

Camp crystal lake home to some of the most adventurous kids every summer the camp would be home to 200 kids with 16 camp counsellors all in charge of them and you were there every year, along with one of your best friends Bang Chan who was a counsellor as well as a lifeguard that worked on the lakes. The entire camp was huge despite there only being nine cabins that the kids could stay in. Eight of them would house 25 kids within their age ranges since kids from the ages of 13 to 17 came to the camp you had to keep them all in different groups so that group activities were fair to everyone. While the younger kids stuck to swimming, football and other outdoor activities the older kids got to learn and do more. Archery, boating, horse riding, and many more things were all part of your daily activities around the forest. There were two major lakes in the camp, Wilderice lake and Crystal lake the one that the camp was named after and each was just off from the cabins that went on a long stretch of road. Everything was pretty close together the only cabin that was far away from the rest of the camp was Seneca, which was known as the punishment cabin. Mostly because kids who had done terrible things were sent up there, only allowed out to go to the toilet, or meal times other than that they had to sit there bored while everyone else got to do the fun activities. Not completely unsupervised of course, that would be dangerous. A camp counsellor would always go to check on them to make sure they weren't doing anything they would regret or that they weren't in any danger.

"Y/n!" You turned around hearing your name being screamed from the entrance and smiled as you saw one of your favourite kids rushing over to you. A bag around her shoulder as she sprinted into your arms, you span her around a little. 

"Hey Alice," You laughed as the small 15-year-old girl began telling you how much fun she was going to have over the summer with everyone. 

"I invited my best friend along, Brenda!" A brunette turned around when she heard her name being yelled and jolted over to you and Alice. 

"We wanted to see if you and Chan were dating yet," You laughed loudly upon hearing Alice, Chan and you were known among everyone as the flirting pair but it was nothing more than playful banter. 

"You're too young to think of boys that way," You began messing up Alice's hair when she moved away from you, whining and straightening out her hair. 

"I'm not, I'm 15 and I know you and Chan lovvveeeee each other," You glared at her playfully about to tell her she was wrong when Chan came to stand beside you. 

"Ah the trouble maker," He whined out, pretending to be upset that Alice was standing there. She was by far your favourite kid there, always willing to do whatever it took to have fun and even helping out around the camp when she needed to. 

"We were just saying how-" Alice stopped speaking when her mother came over, kissing her on the cheek as she began to cry about leaving her at the campground as she did every year. Not that you blamed them, it must have been a nightmare leaving your kids somewhere for two weeks and having no means of communication.

"I'm new, you must be Chan. I've heard a lot," Brenda said as she began shaking Chan's hand with a giant smile on her face, blushing as she turned to look at you. 

"Good choice," You pushed her and Alice towards the bus that would take them down into the camp and you ignored as Chan asked what that was about.

"Go, you have your first round of kids at the lake in an hour." You whined as he walked up behind you, tickling your sides as he demanded to know. 

"Tell meeee," He whispered in your ear, it felt as though a bolt of lightening ran through your entire body and you whined at him once again. Slapping his hands away from you and shaking your head, 

"Go to work, I'll tell you later." Later meant you had enough time to come up with some sort of lie instead of telling him that Alice and Brenda thought you had a crush on him. Which you did but he didn't need to know that. Things between you were good and you didn't want to ruin that by admitting that you had a crush on him, playful flirting was easier than losing him. 

"Who have you got this year?" Chan asked as he sat down beside you in the archery field. It was pitch black sine it was around midnight, the two of you had been so busy with the first day of camp you'd barely seen one another besides a brief encounter at the lake.

"Ages 13 to 14, what about you?" You questioned as you looked up from the folder you were studying from, every year you liked to try and get to know each of the kids you would be looking after for those two weeks. Getting to know their names, likes and dislikes as well as what they were allergic to and everything else you would need to know. 

"16 to 17," He said with a giant smirk plastered across his face, the camp counsellors that were blessed with the older kids barely had to do a thing around the camp. Take them on the odd walk around the forest or make sure they weren't trying to kill ne another with equipment but that was it. They were practically adults and could look after themselves, of course the counsellors would be around if they needed them. 

"You're going to get stuck with the younger ones one summer, even if I have you force you to myself," You joked as you jabbed him with the end of your pen, leaving a small black mark on his white crystal lake shirt.

"Already in uniform?" You frowned looking down at him as you realised he was wearing the red shorts and white shirt combo that was giving to you every year. 

"I thought I would be the first one...That and I accidentally spilt a drink down my only good pair of jeans." He mumbled as he looked at you, you began laughing softly before laying your head on his shoulder tiredly. 

"It's going to be a great summer," He whispered to you as he nudged your softly, 

"Fire night, bring your scary stories and marshmallows!" Someone screamed making you move apart from Chan and nod your head. 

"I've got the perfect scary story," You smirked. Fire night was the night camp counsellors got together to try and tell the best story as well as sharing food something you did every year when the kids all went to bed on the first night. It was somewhat of a tradition amoungst everyone for old and new counsellors to get to know one another. 

"You probably stole mine from last year," Chan rolled his eyes at you jokingly and you rolled yours back, 

"Oh yes because yours about the child who had diabetes was so scary Christopher, I'm still shaking." You pushed his shoulder and got up from the seat you were sitting on, watching as people began filing over in the direction of the fire grounds. It was a huge campfire with logs around it so that everyone could be warm.

It turned out that your story had nothing on what Chan was telling that year, your story was about a girl who got lost in the woods but Chan's was far more creative. 

"Jason was never seen again after he entered the lake and every year when the counsellors came to the camp to set up they were all murdered!" He clapped his hands together making you jump as he continued to tell the story of a masked serial killer killing off counsellors one by one using different ways that were all nearly impossible yet creative. 

"Then just when the counsellor thought she was safe in the water Jason swam up and dragged her down to the bottom of the lake!" Chan finally finished and you did your best not to act as scared as you were about it. It wasn't as though the story was completely impossible, the thought of someone randomly walking onto the camp was easy and they could just as easily kill everyone if they wanted to. 

"You okay?" Chan questioned when he sat back down beside you on the log, giving you a hot chocolate as you stared into the flames. 

"Y-Yeah, peachy," Your voice cracked and Chan knew that you weren't okay, he wrapped his arm around your shoulder. 

"I'll keep you safe," He whispered as you snuggled closer to him just enjoying the feeling of being that close to him.

"I'm heading up to my cabin, walk me?" You questioned as you noticed how late it was getting, you weren't scared of the woods but walking around in the dark wasn't something you opted to do alone most nights especially after the story that had just been shared by Chan.

"Sure," He chuckled softly as he began walking down the field with you heading in the direction of your cabins, all 25 kids seemed to be sleeping so your night was going to be easy. 

"Are you scared?" Chan nudged as you clutched onto his hand tightly as you stood outside the cabin debating going in or staying with him a little while longer. The sparks you were getting from his hand begged you to stay and feel them longer but you knew you had a long day tomorrow and couldn't. 

"N-No," You lied obviously as he smirked at you, hugging you tightly. 

"I'll be right next door, if Jason comes for you I'll save you," You pushed him away before going over to the door and opening it up.

"Night," You whispered to him before heading into the room, Chan stayed outside for a moment just waiting for you to come back out but you never did. He hoped you would come back out and beg to stay with him for the night because you were so scared but you never did.

"Night," He whispered to himself before walking in the direction of his cabin for the night which was right next door to yours. 

The next day was ruined by the thunderstorm that seemingly appeared out of no where. No outdoor actitivties could be done since it was unsafe for everyone to be in the water and no one wanted to get sick out in the cold. 

"Does anyone know where all the board games are?" You questioned as you sat in the dinning hall, 200 kids all staring up at you with unimpressed looks on their faces. You didn't blame them, this was supposed to be one of the best summers of their lives and yet here they were spending it trapped inside where it was raining so hard you thought it was night time.

"Punishment Cabin, we kept them up there last year for Tommy and Ned since they were in there so much." One of the counsellors mentioned as she looked at you, none of you could figure out how to get the kids to calm down so if this was the only way then so be it. Board games and indoor games it would be. 

"Christopher. We're going for a walk," You ordered as you grabbed him by the back of his jacket, pulling him towards the door as you stared out at the rain. It was coming down so hard that it looked as though it was a tap gushing out water, 

"Why? Why can't you go alone? I'm so dry in here," He whined looking at you but all you did was give him your large puppy dog eyes and he melted, giving into you right away and grabbing his umbrella. 

"Let's go." He grumbled as he began heading out into the rain, the two of you sprinting off in the direction of the cabin which was secluded from everything else around the camp. 

"Punishment Cabin," You mumbled as you looked up at the cabin, the roof was leaking a little and the door was wide open thanks to the wind. 

"Let's get the games and leave," You told him as you headed inside finding everything practically ruined that had been on the floor. It was all soaked in water and the roof was leaking inside and on the beds dripping onto the mattresses. 

"Oh shit," He whispered as he looked around noticing everything, a clap of thunder sounded and you jumped back knocking into him as the door slammed shut behind you both jamming in place. 

"What the fuck?" You asked as you twisted the handle trying to open it but it was locked in place, not even budging a little no matter how hard you tried to pull on it. 

"Here, let the man do it." You scoffed stepping away from the door and watching in amusement as Chan continued trying to do the same thing you had been but with little success, 

"Let the man do it," You mocked playfully before sitting down on one of the dry chest of drawers. 

"You're just going to sit there?" You shrugged your shoulders since there wasn't much else you could do, the windows were bolted shut from the outside and it wasn't as if you could just smash them open. 

"Look, they know we're up here. They'll come looking when we don't come straight down." You reassured him as you shivered a little, it wasn't exactly the warmest in the punishment cabin but you would only be there for an hour at the most. 

An hour turned into three and you were sitting in front of the fireplace together trying to stay warm. No one had bothered to come to look for you but not because they didn't want to but that they had planned for this. As soon as the counsellors saw that it was going to rain all day they set their plan into action deciding to take matters into their own hands. They were going to arrange for you both to go up to the cabin and have someone follow behind you, locking you inside and only letting you out when they knew that you had finally confessed your feelings for one another. It was juvenile but they didn't care, every year it was the same. Endless flirting together, the costant hints that you btoh had a crush on one another and they were finally going to make sure you ended up together in ways that were more than just friends. 

"I'm cold," You shivered as Chan started up the fire place that was in the cabin, he'd found old scraps of paper and some matches in the drawers you'd been sitting on and started it up. The thought of you getting sick made him feel bad as he looked over at you,

"Here," He whispered as he began laying down dry blankets and pillows in front of the fire. 

"We'll warm up together," He promised as you sat down on the floor beside him, his arm wrapped around your waist as he pulled you closer to him. Maybe it was the cold or the fact that you were snuggled together in such a romantic setting but you couldn't help but stare up at him in awe. 

"Thanks," You stuttered out as he kept you close to him, your body felt as though it was going to surrender to him. Sitting so close, hearing his heartbeating and the way his fingers traced small patterns on your skin was doing all sorts of things to you. A wetness dripped betwee your tighs as you squeezed them together trying to ignore the sensation and focus on getting warm but it was hard with him right there. 

"You know what might warm us up faster," You finally broke the silence as you glanced up at him, the two of you had been sitting in front of the fireplace for ten minutes. 

"What?" His voice was smooth as he looked down at you, eyes seeming to sparkle in the light of the fire, one thing came over you and you kissed him. Smashing your lips against him and rolling him back against the floor. At first he didn't do anything, he held onto you until he realised what was happening and gave into the feeling of having your lips on his own. 

"F-Fuck," He stuttered out as you pulled away to look at him, his lips were pink from the kissing and you could feel your body heating up from the embarrassment of randomly kissing your best friend. 

"I-I'm sorry...I don't know...I just wanted...I've wanted to do that for so long," As soon as the words left your mouth Chan kissed you once again pulling you to straddle his lap as he kissed you softly. 

Your hips began to move out of habit and you felt him harder beneath you which meant he wanted you just as much as you wanted him.

"N-No one is around," You whispered breathlessly as you began to kiss down his jawline and down his neck. Whimpering at the thought of finally lettin him take you the way you had always dreamed, 

"We would warm up faster," He smirked as he ran his hands down your hips pushing at the red short shorts you were wearing. Your whole body tensed as you realised it was finally, really going to happen. 

"Do you want to?" You nodded at his question and he kissed you again, making out with yo as you both slowly removed one another's clothes piece by piece. 

Laying down completely naked in front of him should have made you nervous but with Chan you weren't at all, he looked at you as if he admired every inch of your skin. Taking a good look as he licked his lips, kissing your lips softly, 

"You're so beautiful," He whispered as he ran his fingers down your stomach until he was at your clit, slowly rubbing your wet bud in circles as you let out a whimper. 

"So wet, how long have you wanted me?" He smirked as he pushed a finger through your folds, your toes dg into the floor as you mewled out, 

"Tell me," He whispered again as he pushed two of his long fingers into you, curling them up to hit your g-spot again and again making your head spin. 

"A while!" You stuttered out as you began squirming underneath him as you moaned out his name. 

"Me too,2 He whispered as he began kissing you deeply, thrusting his fingers deep into your soaking core. Wet noises filled the cabin as Cha continued to take you with his fingers. 

"C-Chan," You breathed out as you gripped onto the blankets that were surrounding you, you felt intensity building up inside of you.

"I-I'm gonna-" You couldn't cum before he took his fingers out of your abruptyly and smirked as he began kissing you possessively, your legs wrapped around his waist pulling him close to you. 

"So needy," He chuckled as you let out a hiss when his cock ran through your folds, 

"Shut up and fuck me, we've waited too long." You begged as your breath as heavy, he smirked shaking his head and kissing down your body. 

"I want to taste first," He whispered as he kissed towards your core, he lingered above your cunt and looked up at you to check that it was okay. Once you gave him a nod he dove his tongue between your lips and began flicking your cunt with his tongue. 

"Oh shit!" You screamed out as your hands worked their wayy into his hair, pulling him closer as he continued to eat you out, biting down softly on the part of your outer labia making your eyes roll back. 

"J-Just like that," You cried out as you felt your orgasm building again, he hummed against your cunt and you shuddered over and over again as he continued to eat you out like you were his last meal. 

"C-Cumming," Your voice cracked as the pleasure exploded in you without warning, your head threw back against the pillows and you filled the cabin with your desperate moans of his name. 

He kissed you sweetly as he lined his cock up with your opening, teasing you with the tip as he smirked against your lips. 

"No teasing," You whined out, too desperate for any games that he was planning in his head. 

"As you wish," He pushed his hips forward slowly, sinking into you. You moaned out squeezing your eyes tightly at the stretching, he stayed still for a moment wanting you to feel comfortable before he even tried to move inside of you, 

“Y-You can move," You whimpered as you opened your eyes, his cock felt incredible inside of you, you felt full as you gripped around him as if he had always belonged there. 

"Shit you're so tight," He whined out as he grunted, slowly pulling out of you only to thrust back in as he let out a small moan. 

"Mmm Chan, please," You begged, digging your heels into his ass wanting him to move faster than he was and he smirked, 

"Chan please," He mocked playfully before he began to move his ips faster, fucking into you as you let out moans of pleasure he was sure people would have heard even from the dinning hall. 

"Just like that!" You screamed out as he began thrusting harder into you making you squeal out as he rammed in and out of you. Cock hitting so deep you thought if he came it would be deep in your gut. 

He continued to fuck into you hard, changing between slow and passionate thrusts to hard and fast ones as he stared down into your eyes. 

"Holy shit," You cried out as you felt yourself tighrening around him, the build up becoming too much as you began to cry out his name, pleasure reeling inside of you. 

"You close?" He questioned as he felt you tightening more and more with each thrust of his cock. 

"Cum for me," He whispered as he bent down into your ear, biting down as you wrapped your legs around his waist drawing him closer if that were even possible until you finally came undone around him. Grunting out he pulled out of you, cumming onto your stomach as you giggled up at him. 

"Shit," He panted watching in awe as you ran your fingers through the liquid and licked your fingers clean. 

"Y-You're going to be the death of me," He panted ashe laid down beside you and took a deep breath.

"We should move babe," He whispered an hour or two later after you had been laying there, the sun was out and someone was bound to come looking for you now that you had been gone for so long. 

"Here-" He handed you the shirt he had been wearing and then your shorts before he slipped on his coat since he had used your top to clean up your stomach. 

"Babe?" You looked at him with a smirk on your lips,

"You don't think I'm going to just have sex with you and leave it be, do you? I'm in love with you." He whispered as he kissed your lips again, the door opening just as you kissed each other. 

"They finally kissed," Someone announced out of the door, if only they knew the two of you had done a lot more than kissing in that cabin that day.

Tagline: @taestannie @sw33tnight @acciocriativity @mwitsmejk @minholuvs @anxiousbobatea @justbangtanthingz​

[harrywritingsbyme]

hello sweetheart, I have a kink for daddy!h, corruption!h and a size kink too. can u elaborate pls? xx

The Stages of Corruption

A/N: My brain and puthy are about to explode for the same yet very different reasons lmao. Anyways...imma add this hot lil thing to A Series of Firsts bc why tf not?! And I hope it doesn’t suck…enjoy🙃.

Harry was obsessed with you. He could honestly say that from the moment he met and laid eyes on you for the first time, he was hooked. And yes it was for the obvious reasons of how beautiful and sweet you were inside and out. You were like a magnet, he couldn’t help but to be attracted to you in every way shape and form. But besides that, Harry was also hooked because of how cute and innocent you were. See, Harry had acquired a bit of a corruption kink. In past relationships, he’d always been with someone who had their fair share of experience in the bedroom. But with you, it was the complete opposite. After gliding right through the getting to know you’s, and the building of the foundation for you guys’ relationship, you and Harry moved right into the intimacy phase. And as if Harry had hit the nail on the head when it came down to your innocence, you weren’t well versed in the bedroom at all and you hadn’t really done anything either. The farthest you’d ever gone was a bit of over the clothes touching; which was exactly what Harry was dying to hear. He was yearning to teach you and to be the one to expose you to pleasure. He wanted to be the first thought in your mind when the word pleasure was brought up. He wanted to hear your pretty little voice beg for him and your body to quiver desperately for him. Harry wanted to corrupt you.

And over the course of time, Harry was able to do that.

For starters, Harry got you comfortable with calling him daddy in the bedroom. You’d accidentally blurted it out when the two of you were going at it a little bit. He was on top of you and between your legs, kissing down and suckling on your neck as he had a hand up your skirt that was softly rubbing you through your panties. You were so caught up in how good this newfound feeling of having him on top of you with his face in your neck and leaving marks in the process while touching you between your legs felt that he name just flew out of your mouth. When Harry heard it, his head flew up from your neck and down in the direction of your face to address what you called him. Still to this day he could remember how you got all blushy as he pestered you to say it again. Eventually, Harry was in fact able to get you to say it again and he was able to get you comfortable with saying it in general. You became so comfortable with it that you’d call him daddy in every day situations when it was just the two of you. And to make matters worse, you sounded so sweet when you said it too. This meant that Harry’s cock always perked up in his pants resulting in him needing to take care of himself. Luckily for him, almost 99% of the time he took care of himself, he did it with your help.

The next thing on Harry’s corruption check list was familiarizing you with pleasure. He wanted you to have an understanding the feelings that came along with a release and what it felt like to have an orgasm. When he made you cum for the first time, it was a completely euphoric atmosphere for you both. Harry was lying between your legs while you were completely naked against the bed, taking everything that he was giving you. He used his fingers and mouth to send shockwaves through your body. He just sucked and sucked on your cunt and pushed his fingers all they way up into you. You were squirming and whining against the bed as he continued to work the area between your legs. He pushed is fingers in and out of you over and over again as he continuously sucked on your clit and nipped at the delicious flesh of your thighs. When his fingers weren’t inside of you, his mouth was on your pussy, licking up and down your folds and pushing the  tip of his tongue in towards your entrance. You were so overcome with pleasure as he did this that he had to pin your hips down to the bed in order to keep going and push you into your release. You were crying out to him (or daddy for that matter), you were pulling tightly on his hair, and you were clenching up against his tongue as he pulled you closer and closer to your release. And once he did, you were even more of a mess when he was getting you up to that point. You were crying out to him about how your tummy was warm and tight and that you felt like you had to pee and you couldn’t hold back. There were even little tears forming in your eyes from how intense it was. And when you finally let go, you were gushing all over his hand. Harry got to feel first hand your walls convulsing around his finger (he was only able to get one in since you were beyond tight) as you came. And for you, the feeling was absolutely amazing. It was like a wave of pleasure crashed down onto you and went right through your body. You wanted to feel it again and again and again; you were addicted to it.

After letting you feel what it was like to have a release, Harry helped you figure out what felt good to you and how to pleasure yourself. He kept your naked body between his legs in front of a mirror and guided your hand and the vibrating bullet he got for you between your legs and showed you how to pleasure and tease yourself. This was definitely a lifesaver when you weren’t with Harry but you were craving an amazing release. You kept the tips Harry gave you locked in your mind and you just made yourself feel good. And to make it even better, you kept your eyes shut and just imagined Harry on top of you, touching and toying with your body. You couldn’t believe that you were able to pleasure yourself on you own, and you were so excited about it that you did it all by yourself for the first time that as soon as your hands were no longer tingly, you immediately texted Harry to tell him. Your message was almost instantly met with a response of him being so proud of you and that since you were being such a big girl for daddy, he’d have to give you a little treat. With that being said, after replying with a “can’t wait”, you go straight back to your vibrator to take care of the tingling sensation that was forming in your clit again.

Now onto the fourth checkpoint on Harry’s list. By this point, you and Harry have been playing solely with you. He wanted to make sure that you were completely taken care of and he just wanted to dote on you. He was teaching you so many different things about your pleasure and you were soaking it all up and playing with it. And since you were comfortable with your pleasure, Harry figured that it was time to bring his own pleasure into the mix. When he first pulled his cock out of his pants, you were floored. You couldn’t believe that he managed to hold all of that in his pants and you were definitely skeptical of whether or not it would fit inside once you two got to that point. But knowing Harry and how he guided you through everything so far, you weren’t that nervous about it. Instead of actually guiding you through what to do, Harry let you play with his cock. You wrapped your smaller hands around him and you tugged and squeezed him. Your eyes were focused in on his cock, taking in every detail of him. You were also taking him his moans above you, they were your guide to know if you were doing something right. Now while you were playing with his cock, Harry was in heaven. Harry had his innocent little girlfriend on her knees playing with his cock. He was on cloud nine from the way you squeezed and tugged at him. He was also blown away by the way you brought your forefinger and thumb up to squeeze the swollen head of his cock between them, and by the way you pressed your forefinger down into his glistening slit. You were doing everything right without even trying and Harry was all for it. What made him burst even faster though was when you pursed your lips around the head of his cock. You weren’t expecting him to put in in your mouth the first time you touched him so that just threw him over the edge. And as he came, you were quick to pull your mouth back and just watch his cock erupt right in front of you as you took in his moans. You just watched as the streams of his thick cum spurted out from his cock; and it was a lot too, he just kept going. He came so much that your hands were covered in it since they were still wrapped around his very sizable shaft. But it gets even better. After pulling your hands away from his cock, you bring one of your hands up to your mouth to lick up some of his cum. When you first tasted it, you had to admit that the taste was very interesting to say the least. It wasn’t bad per say…it was just different. But after some more licks and Harry being completely dumbfounded above you, the taste grew on you and you went on to not only clean your hands but also his cock.

This moment was the catalyst to so many things. You went on to taking his cock into your mouth (and throat because he was huge) and even letting him flood your mouth with his cum. After practicing, you became addicted to having Harry’s cock inside you mouth. You were so addicted that if he told you to drop to your knees, you’d be down there in an instant. And Harry loved that. Another thing that was brought into the mix was 69-ing. The both of you were obsessed with giving and receiving oral pleasure so it came naturally; and it was amazing. The entire time, the both of you would be mouthing at each other and holding back so you could keep receiving that pleasure. And when you both came, your juices right on each others tongues. One final thing that was introduced into you guys’ mix was something that was highlighted on Harry’s mental checklist. Face fucking. He’d accidentally lifted his hips up into your face, sending his cock deep into your throat, causing you tog gag a bit.   When he realized what he’d done, he immediately pulled your head up to check on you, and when he did, he was met with a response he wasn’t expecting. You told him that you liked it and to keep doing it. From that point on Harry’d thrust his cock into your mouth and just listen to your gags and feel your nails clawing into his thighs as he fucked his cock into your mouth/throat. What he loved the most about it was the little drops of cum that gathered in the corners of your mouth and your watery eyes once he was all done. It was perfect.

Now Harry was beyond happy with where you guys were and was enjoying every moment of pleasure with you. But the both of you had reached the biggest part of the checklist. Actually having sex. Harry was 1000% against pressuring you into it. He wanted you to be completely comfortable and ready for that big moment. And you were. After just enjoying Harry, you were ready to enjoy Harry. It was a bit daunting to think about all of him fitting inside of you but Harry always took his time with you so you were pretty confident in him doing that at this very big moment for you both. And once that big moment arrived, it was great. When you told Harry that you were ready, he didn’t just jump right in. He planned everything out for you to really have your moment. He put his corruption checklist to the side and made it extra romantic. Harry felt so bad that you were experiencing a bit of pain as he pushed into you that he was constantly giving you kisses and praising you for how well you were doing and telling you that he loved you. But even though he was focusing on you, Harry was exploding inside. You were so warm and tight that Harry could’ve came within the first 5 minutes. You were so tight that even if he wanted to slam into you, he couldn’t. He almost passed out too.  It wasn’t surprising that he felt this way though. Harry definitely had a bit of a size kink. Once you’re a little bit comfortable, Hary slowly moves in and out of you. After a perfect stream of slow thrusts along with his fingers toying at your clit and his mouth against your chest, you end up releasing around him and Harry let’s go inside of you per you guys’ conversation a bit earlier.

The first time, along with a some times after that were soft and slow. They were so that you could be comfortable and used to having him inside of you. And as these times progressed on, the pleasure increased and you were getting even more geared up to take everything Harry had. Which you ended up taking like a champ by the way. Once you were all good to go, Harry went back to his corruption check list. And you two went at it. It was so good that the mere thought of it gave you goosebumps. Fast forward up to now and you two were going at it anytime, anywhere, anyway. You were screaming as he pounded into you forcefully, begging him to give it to you. Harry had his hands wrapped around your throat, pinning your head down to the bed as he dropped his hips down onto yours. What kept him going wasn’t solely your screams and  how good you felt, it was also the end result of it all. He loved it when your thighs and pussy were sore and you could still feel him in your stomach as his cum poured out of you. You two were always in a daze after sex and you both were just about completely numb as well. But as you and Harry were in that state, you both were contemplating the next amazing round.

And neither of you would have it any other way. He was teaching you, your body was always quivering, and your mouth was always begging for more. And yet, there were still an infinite amount of stages on Harry’s corruption check list. This was just the beginning.

Masterlist

[fandom-monium]

Kinky but Not Really

Summary: In which you make an odd request, and Spencer tries to fulfill it. “I don’t want to disrespect you...”

WC: 1.8k

TW: Spencer Reid x GN!Reader, fluff, cussing, established relationships (blegh), light use of sexual themes including light degradation, light violence, and the slamming into walls (nothing explicitly sexual or nsfw bc im a wimp), specifically post-prison Reid, ft. Garvez and Rossi

Spencer loves you. He’s never doubted that for a second.

Your laugh as you throw your head back. Your eyes, the way they crinkle when you grin too wide. Even your style, whether you’re in joggers or suits, just does something to him he can't quite explain. Really, he loves you. 

Even if you’re weird.

Spencer knew what he was getting into, okay? He didn’t consider it earlier in your friendship, but as time went on and you two grew more comfortable around each other it became apparent that he wasn’t the only… outlier in the team. By the time you officially got together, he was already used to it.

But somehow you still manage to surprise him.

“You want me to what?” 

“I know it’s a lot to ask,” You wince as Spencer coughs. With his sleeve, he wipes the coffee dribbling down his chin, staring at you as if someone hit you over the head. It has to be the only viable explanation, considering what you’ve just asked him. “But hear me out.”

Spencer sits up and sets his mug on the coffee table. “Wh...what? Why? No-what? When?”

You wring your hands together, shifting your weight foot to foot as he squints at you. “Okay. When: um, some time after you came back from prison? I think? Why, I’m not sure. That’s why I’m asking you.” 

“I don’t know, (Your Name),” Spencer rolls his lips together, anything and everything that could possibly go wrong racing through his mind. 

“Nothing extreme! I don’t expect you to slap me across the face⏤”

“Oh my god⏤”

“Just small things! Start off light,” You think for a moment. “Like shoving me around or smacking me. Calling me names.”

“I hear where you’re coming from, but I don’t want to…” He flushes, his voice hushed like what he's about to say is forbidden, “disrespect you.”

You take his hands in yours with a bright smile, “Hon, I love you, but please. I’m the one asking you to get violent with me.”

“What the-when did you up your demands?”

You continue, “Like, if you think about it, you’d be doing me a favor. Respecting my wishes by ‘disrespecting’ me. So, what do you think?” You watch him carefully, legs tucked under you, a hopeful sparkle in your eyes. He can almost see the dog tail wagging behind you.

How can he say no?

"Alright, if that's what you really want," Spencer sighs, smiling as you break out into a grin. He laughs when you tackle him into the couch, thanking him repeatedly. 

“Yeah, yeah, I’ll try. But starting tomorrow.”

“That’s fine!” You sit up, smiling down at him. Your lips wiggle as you try to suppress your anticipation. “No pressure, just do what you feel comfortable with and we’ll see from there?”

Spencer bites his lip and nods. “Sure.”

⏤

The men of the BAU are distinct; you can tell just by looking at them.

David Rossi, though the eldest, the senior, is suave and has a level of sophistication that could only come with age. It’s in his blazers, his stride, the warm yet knowing eyes. A reassurance that eases the people around him.

Matt Simmons rocks the young dad vibes, with the smooth-shaven face and simple clothing. Not to mention a smile that makes him good with both children and adults alike.

Then there’s Luke.

“You!”

Luke nearly falls out of his chair as Garcia stomps over, sitting up in attention as the click of her pumps grow nearer. “What? What happened?”

“You! You happened,” Garcia hisses, looming over him while Rossi comes up from behind. 

“Penelope, we don’t know for sure⏤”

“Who else could possibly do this? Matt and you could never. Only this troll could have done this,” She whips back on Luke, her eyes⏤usually bright with mischief⏤burning and accusatory. “Fix it!”

And just to tick her off, because that’s the purpose of their relationship: “No.” 

She sputters, fuming pink as her lipstick. And as Luke revels in the oncoming eruption, sneering at Garcia, Rossi⏤that wise geezer⏤squints at him.

“You don’t know what we’re talking about, do you?”

“... Not a clue.”

Maybe I should've retired. Rossi sighs, “Spencer and (Your Name) have been off today, and we think they’re having a fight.”

“And you think I have something to do with that?” Luke's face pinches in offense.

“You didn't see them today, have you?" 

"No?"

Garcia, shaking off her fury, is more than ready to spill the tea. "Kay, so this morning on the way up, I saw Spencer and (Your Name) waiting for the elevator and Spencer just snatched their coffee. And he didn’t even bother to let them into the elevator first.”

Luke frowns, “I mean, it's a bit ungentlemanly but I don’t think that means they’re fighting.”

(Had she shared the lift, she would have seen how apologetic Spencer was, nearly bursting into tears as he hands you the cup of coffee, throwing you whatever cash he has.)

“And during lunch I caught them down the hall by the break room,” Rossi recounts, wincing at the image, “They were talking in hushed tones, then Spencer shoved passed (Your Name) and stalked off.”

(If he’d check on you, he might have caught the proud gleam in your eyes, grinning wide at Spencer’s attempt at getting rough with you.)

“And you still think I’m involved?” Luke raises an eyebrow at Garcia.

She’s completely unapologetic as she scoffs, “Listen, I don’t know how Spencer can stand being friends with you, but clearly you influenced him in some way because before he met you, he was my sweet summer child. Now…” She withholds a sob, Rossi sympathetically patting her shoulder. “You’ve tainted him!”

“I… I don’t know how to respond to that.”

“Then don’t,” Garcia sniffs, drying away tears. “Just bring our Spencer back!”

“Bring me back from what?”

They jump in unison, turning to find Spencer has returned from his break and is now back at his desk. He eyes them curiously as they fumble for an explanation.

“Hey, Doc,” Luke, deciding to end all this turmoil, asks, “Are you and (Your Name) having uh... lovers quarrel?” 

“A what?”

Garcia shoots him a look, “A ‘lovers quarrel’? Really?”

“Well, I doubt they’re fighting, and honestly a lovers quarrel sounds much less intense than⏤you know⏤fighting.”

“No, we are not fighting. Why would you think⏤oh, you saw...” Spencer’s face falls, melting into embarrassment. 

"Saw? Son, we witnessed," Rossi huffs as he crosses his arms and stares down Spencer. "Would you care to explain?"

"I know what you're thinking, but I swear it's not what it looks like. This is..." After his explanation, his embarrassed flush only deepens at their mortified expressions. 

"I've never wanted to be this close to you."

"My sweet summer child is no longer."

"Guys, chill. I for one am glad Spencer is willing to…” Luke gives him an awkward smile, “keep it interesting. The best relationships take effort, right?”

Spencer hums, nodding, “Exactly. We’re doing great⏤”

“Hey, guys,” You greet as usual.

Without missing a beat, he faces you and snaps, “Damn it, (Your Name), for once stop running your mouth and get me a drink.”

Luke, Garcia, and Rossi freeze, gaze switching between Spencer and you, waiting with bated breath. They haven’t seen Spencer remotely like this, not since prison. And despite knowing that you asked for this, they’re fully prepared to throw themselves in front of him just in case. 

But instead of reacting violently as they expected, you pause, taking his poor attempt at a glare in stride. Then you smile, heading to the coffee machine. “Sure, no problem.”

Spencer turns back to them. “See? B-better than ever...”

“Dude, are you crying?”

⏤

“So you couldn't do it, huh?"

Shoulders drooping from exhaustion, Spencer slumps against your desk and sighs, “No, I’m sorry.”

You shrug, “It’s okay. Thanks for trying though. As a reward, let’s get take-out. My treat." You press a kiss to his cheek, but the smile you shoot him only serves to make his heart sink. “Meet me at the elevator, k? I’ll get my things.”

“Okay...” As Spencer shrugs on his satchel, he can’t help the guilt squirming in his stomach. Why does he feel like he disappointed you? Or more accurately⏤didn’t meet your expectations. Sure, you’ve had your fair share of disputes and as Luke put it, “lovers quarrels”, but never has he felt so… defeated.

Is this what failure feels like? It sucks.

So as the elevator shuts, as it dings with every descended level, as you babble about what you should have for dinner, Spencer makes an executive decision. 

A final stand, if you will.

You turn to Spencer, “So, what do you want for dinner⏤”

You yelp as your back hits the wall, the back of your head cushioned by Spencer’s palm because he’d rather kill himself than hurt you, pressing his body against yours. Warmth envelopes him, and as you meet his gaze, he musters all the dark emotions he can, the side of him he didn’t realize he had until prison. He feels it⏤the fury, the disgust, the merciless violence⏤bubble to the surface, and he can’t deny the satisfaction he gets seeing your eyes wide with shock; the entire day you’ve seen him coming, taking every one of his attempts like a joke in spite of his best efforts.

At least now he feels like he’s got the upper-hand.

Spencer leans in, bumping his nose against yours in an Inuit kiss. It’s a gentle contrast to his next words, and as your breath hitches, he bites back a smirk, pulling back to meet your eyes.

“What I want is for you to shut your mouth and put it to good use.”

Your jaw slackens.

The elevator dings and you both jump, Spencer quickly pulling away from you as the door opens to the parking garage. Luckily, no one else is around and Spencer leads the way as you head for your car. But you’re silent as you walk, and he wonders if he went too far. Was he too rough? Disrespectful?

“Hey, (Your Name), are you⏤” Spencer looks over his shoulder, only to halt at your expression. 

You give him a toothy grin, face flushed and eyes crinkling as you tilt your head at him. “Yes?”

...Ah. If you keep looking at him like that, his heart might burst.

Letting his bag drop at his side, Spencer pulls you into a tight hug, and for a moment you sway together, hearts beating in time, breathing steady.

Spencer sighs, “I don’t get it.”

“It’s okay, I don’t get it either!”

He smiles into your shoulder, chuckling. Yeah, he loves you.

Especially because you’re weird.

⏤

AN: hello took a break from studying and wrote this trash at 2 am whoops

to the user that requested some rough d/s smut with degradation and rough play, im sorry but my asexual ass just could not with this one. but as a kinky asexual i rolled with it✨

pls take the “rough” play and “degradation” lightly. it’s not supposed to be accurate representation. this is just reader and spencer experimenting and having fun!!

i love that yall have the hots for post-prison reid while im over here just wanting to tuck him into bed and kill anyone that brings him harm😳

[flamingo-writes]

It's Better When The Sun Goes Down — Nanami x Reader

This is a piece for the Anilysium Server NSFW Collab! Make sure to check the masterlist to see other writer's works! This month's prompt was: "I can't hold back anymore"

I'd like to dedicate this fanfic to one of my dearest and closest friends. I'm not a Nanami simp myself, but they are. And I have fun writing for Nanami, and also I love writing angsty things and flawed characters. Reg, I hope you enjoy this as much as you enjoy my more casual writing.

(it's pink bcs youre Chancho)

Word Count: 5.4K

Warnings: Mentions of breakup and heartbreak, alcohol and drug consuption, public sex, ghosting, lots and lots of angst. This does not have a happy ending. This is also non proof read bcs I kinda left it to the last minute I'm sorry, I'll go back and edit it when I am not in a rush dcj nd

Summary: Nanami’s return to the Sorcerer life wasn’t so bad. It could be better if Gojo wasn’t determined to get him back with his ex. As Nanami tries to get on good terms with them, things get out of control, only to end up where it all began.

I made this playlist while writing, in case you wanna listen to it while reading. Preferably listen to it without the shuffle, but you can hear it on shuffle, no biggie.

Nanami had forgotten how painfully unbearable Gojo could be. His return as a Sorcerer had been nothing out of the ordinary for a Sorcerer's standards. Missions here and there, or watching over some of Gojo's students. But God, he had surely stepped out of the line this time.

He couldn't even begin to explain how much he hated his current situation. Fighting by your side for the first time in years felt like rubbing hot oil on an open wound. The uncomfortable ignoring the elephant in the room between you two, as you two tracked and fought what felt like a million Curses.

When the adrenaline was at its peak, it felt almost nostalgic; though he'd then remembered everything else and immediately made his own reality bitter and awkward. Overshadowed by the advantage of years of experience ahead of him made him resent you even more. He knew it was childish and pointless to keep remembering everything that happened between you two, but that bittersweet memory would most likely keep him at bay.

You were still strong, witty, fearless, reckless and quick to act and defend yourself. The way you moved looked more swiftly and coordinated than you did back in your student days. Almost as if you were a professional dancer. He hated every bit of it. He couldn’t stop looking at you, thinking about you, and the possibilities of what you two would have become.

After the mission was over, no words were exchanged between you two. Aside from the: "Are you alright?" He told you as you simply gave him a thumbs up as you caught your breath drenched in sweat. An entire ride in an uncomfortable silence, until he reached the school and you got out of the car.

"Thanks. You did a great job. Keep it up" You said. Cold, and straight to the point. Closing his car door before he could reply. And soon, you were gone.

As Nanami tried to get his mind off the mission, Gojo made it difficult. He called him to ask for the details of the mission. He seemed amused and intrigued, as clearly you hadn't told him shit. And honestly, he could understand why. Gojo was meddling on things that weren’t his business, and things that had died a long time ago.

"Why are you interrogating me, Gojo?" He asked as he pressed hisnfingers on the bridge of his nose. "Ask your underling…"

"Because that jerk left for the bar as soon as they arrived" He explained. "And I know better than to annoy a drunk [Name], It took me a while but...I finally learned my lesson" He chuckled. “I knew they could hit hard, but damn, I had a big ass bruise…” Nanami could almost hear his stupid grin.

"You make it sound like it's a recurrent event" Nanami pointed out, slightly surprised as he didn't know you were a drinker.

"Oh, Nanami-kun, you really know nothing huh?" Gojo said, smiling widely as he had managed to manipulate Nanami into asking.

"Know what?" Nanami hissed as he now swore he could hear Nanami creepily grinning at his phone.

"No, nothing!” Gojo said as if it were nothing; trying and succeeding at peeking at Nanami’s curiosity “I'm not gonna talk over depressing things on the phone. Gotta go, bye! Kith kith, Kento-kun" Gojo sang and hung up, as he smirked, proud of his little mischief. He sighed deeply as he stretched in his bed. "Soon, those two will be back together" he smirked to himself.

Nanami hissed a curse under his breath as he locked his phone and threw it on his bed and went to the kitchen. If he had understood well, Gojo had just hinted at a possible drinking problem. He tried shaking his mind off of it. You couldn't, could you? You weren’t a drinker...You weren’t the last time he saw you. You were able to party and have fun without having to intoxicate yourself.

You were wild, cheerful, unpredictable. Everything he was not. And that’s what had made him fall in love with you back in your school days. You were so laid back, he could feel it permeating into him when you two hung out. The few times he’d broken rules was because you’d been the bad influence, however, you somehow managed to get away with it, and leave him with some distant memory in which he felt actually glad to be alive. He usually felt like he was walking on a cloud stuck in time, being present and enjoying the little things that made his everyday memories.

He’d really screwed up after breaking up with you...if he could call that a breakup... His life took a dramatic turn. And then, he turned his back to this world, and got immersed in the gray life the average man in Japan had. Away from what he's familiar with, away from his friends, away from you.

And now, apparently, you had a drinking habit. He wondered if he had caused it, or if he was one of the reasons behind it. The guilt started creeping in. The same guilt and regret he felt after ghosting on you. Not being able to bring himself to properly end things with you.

The guilt he’d managed to swipe under the rug for so many years creeped back out, and followed him around as the afternoon went by. After having a shower, changing into more comfortable clothes and in a lame attempt to cook dinner, he decided to test his luck. He put on a dark button down shirt and decided to go to the bar closest to the School. He felt the naive hope to find you there. However, if you had an actual problem, then his chances to see you there were higher.

Such was his surprise to find you there, trying to get rid of some insistent guy who kept talking to you despite your very obvious lack of interest. Before you could spot him, he watched you aggressively turn to the guy and talk to him in a rather rude tone. Sounding almost like a moody sailor as the guy’s face soon was washed with horror and disgust and walked away. As you turned your face back to your drink, your eyes scanned the bar, finally spotting him.

“Oh god” You whined as you pulled the glass to your lips. “It’s too early to be this drunk…” You hissed.

“Mind if I sit here?” He asked, pointing at the chair in front of you.

“Tell Gojo to go fuck himself…” You snapped at him as you stood up and stumbled your way to the bar asking for a refill. Nanami looked at you, feeling slightly sorry for your tipsy state, as he’d never seen you like that. And he knew being mad and drunk was never a good combination. As you turned around with your glass and made your way back to your table, you gave him a slightly repulsed smile. “You’re still here…”

“Gojo didn’t send me here, if that’s what you’re thinking” He replied.

“He might as well have manipulated you into doing so, has that crossed your mind?” You said with a sassy tone as you sat back down. “Why are you still standin’?”

Nanami took that as an invitation as he ignored your last comment, trying to refuse the idea that Gojo had manipulated him.

“Rough day, huh?” He said as you nodded and stared at your drink.

“Look, Kento. I’m glad that you’re back. I really am. You’re strong, and you’re smart…” You began. “But I’m gonna cut the chase, I’m kinda annoyed too. Ever since you got back, Gojo has been sticking his snobby nose into my business” You explained. “Many of the missions he sends you in, I’m supposed to be there as well, but manage to get busy by then and not go”

“So you’re actively avoiding me?”

“Yes” You replied bluntly. “Mostly because Gojo is trying very hard to bring us back together. But no, I learned my lesson the first time” You said taking a sip to your scotch, feeling it smoothly sliding down your throat, no longer feeling the burn from the alcohol.

“I haven’t apologized for that…” Nanami began.

“Don’t” You interrupted him. “It’s better this way”

“Are you sure? Because you still seem to have an issue with it…” Nanami said, managing to read you like an open book like he always did. He still had that ability.

You glared at him, angrily as you opened your mouth to snap back at him, but your mind was foggy and a big portion of your brain was focused on the little details surrounding him. His black shirt, the first buttons undone. His thick wrists, one of them hiding underneath a fancy looking watch, his blond hair pushed back, his sharp features...And god, his smell. The smell of his cologne luring you in like a fly to honey. Since any words made it to your mouth, your next step was to take another sip.

“You’re drinking too fast” He pointed out.

“None of your business” You said standing up and taking your wallet out and leaving a few bills on the tale. “I’m out” You said coldly and walked out of the bar.

Nanami sighed, frustrated that he hadn’t managed to get anything out of interaction. Aside from the pretty clear fact that you disliked him. However, he didn’t think of the possibility of you resenting him so much because you still had feelings for him.

As you walked out of the bar, the chilly wind hit the back of your neck, making you shiver. You cursed, knowing it was going to make you feel drunker faster. You made your way to the school with long steps, trying to make it to your dorm before your last drink made it to your head. Despite the cold wind, the hot tears in your eyes in a way kept your face warm. As you tried to keep yourself from crying, you heard steps behind you.

“Wait” You heard Nanami’s voice calling behind you as you stopped on command, against your own will. You swallowed the lump on your throat and managed to keep the tears still in your eyes, as you refused to look at

him. “At least let me walk you home. You can’t walk on your own like this…”

“Oh, so now you care?” You said turning around and looking at him, giving him a smug smile. “You’ve changed” You scoffed bitterly.

“Please” He said, knowing better than trying to argue with you.

Your stare on him softened, as something within you urged you to say yes. To have more time with Nanami and maybe cling to the bittersweet memories you were constantly reliving since his return.

“Fine” You said, very much to his surprise. He smiled and walked closer to you with the gentle smile that had been haunting your dreams as of lately.

“C’mon. My car is not far from here…”

You stopped coldly as he mentioned a car. Taking a second look at him, you wondered how much he’d changed. He’d become an adult through and through, hadn’t he? While you were still a mess...Or so you thought. To Nanami’s eyes, you were a far better sorcerer and warrior than him. And he envied you for it.

“Are you actually going to take me to the school?” You asked, suddenly growing suspicious of him, as you’d had plenty of experiences with strangers on the street and knew better than going into someone’s car in a drunken state.

Not that you didn’t trust Nanami. You didn’t trust yourself drunk.

“I was actually thinking of taking you somewhere for dinner and then to the school” He said.

“Not hungry”

“No, but you’re drunk. It’ll sober you up, and tomorrow morning you’ll thank me when you wake up without a hangover” He said as he walked towards his car.

“I don’t have any more money on me” You lied, looking for an excuse to avoid spending any more than necessary with him.

“I didn’t ask you if you have money” He said boldly as he managed to make you smirk for the first time since his return.

“Smooth, Nanami. You’ve grown” You said as you followed him.

The walk to his car felt like your chest burnt far more than the alcohol ever did. It felt bitter, it hurt and was nauseating. Was it really it, or was it the alcohol finally catching up with you? Like flashes of instant memories being erased from your memory, the drive to a restaurant felt like a poorly edited foreign film. The car felt like some intense themed park ride as you felt dizzy with the alcohol whispering everything you missed about him. It was gross and it was sickening.

The Ramen sign on the outside on itself managed to sober you up a little by taking your mind off Nanami. As you followed him, clumsily standing on your feet, you sat on one of the tables and tried to make sense of the dancing letters in the menu. More flashes of memories were taken off your head, as you wondered what was happening and how drunk were you for you to start blacking out.

“Not good…” you muttered under your breath.

“Did you say something?” Nanami asked.

“No. Nothing”

“How are you holding up?”

“I’m not”

“You’ll feel better in a bit. Don’t worry…” He said softly as he sipped from a soda you didn’t know he had. When had he ordered it? You looked in front of you to the nice surprise that you had one too despite not knowing how or when. “I ordered some ramen for you. Something spicy...It’ll sober you up faster”

You chuckled as you looked at him.

“And how do you know that?” You asked with a cheeky tone as he smiled softly.

“Went drinking a lot with friends from work” He said. “I learned a few things here and there”

More brief black outs kept lazily painting a rather miserable painting in your memory. As you ate your ramen, you found yourself relaxing more and more. Was it the hot spicy broth? In the beginning, the balck outs weren’t getting any less frequent, however, as the night went by, you found yourself sobering up like he said. Soon, the black outs were gone, however you were still somehow locked in a haze. Although it made sense. The amount of booze as well as the short time, it was going to take a lot more than just one hot bowl of spicy ramen to get you back to a sober state.

The conversation kept flowing comfortably as both of you ate. It was reminiscent of the old days, nostalgic and somehow morbid. As the both of you tried to grasp at the old days when your worries were limited to school work. Catching up like old friends who hadn't seen each other, as if you didn’t have hard feelings for each other.

After having finished your food, Nanami paid for both of your meals and went back out into the cold night. The sky black, stars hidden by the streetlights as you made it to his car and finally noticed the silver color in it.

As he drove back to the school, you noticed he took a small detour, instantly setting alarms in your head.

“Where are we going?” You asked, your voice considerably serious as he noticed the change in tone from the pleasant talk they were having in the restaurant.

“There’s somewhere I’d like to go…” He said as he briefly looked at you and gave you a tender smile.

That smile made your heart uncomfortably skip a beat as you hated the effect he still had on you. You didn’t dare to ask any further as you slowly recognized the route he was taking. As he slowly took one of the roads towards the edge of the city close to the coast line. He stopped in a rather deserted place, as he got off the road and stopped the car.

Despite the lack of light, aside from the few streetlights, you knew exactly where you were. A whole in your chest opened dramatically as you felt your eyes tear up and happy memories attached to the location flooded your mind.

“Kento…” You said chuckling bitterly.

“When I said I wanted to apologize, I meant it…” He said as you clenched your jaw and looked out your window, avoiding his stare.

“And I told you I didn’t want to talk about it…”

“You’re still upset about it, I get it. And I don’t blame you” He began as he felt his heart beating hard in his chest. “Look at me, please”

You wanted to say something to him. But you knew you would break down crying as soon as you opened your mouth. You took a deep breath and without saying anything you looked at him. His dark brown eyes gazing into yours, as he was looking at you with a rather pained stare.

“You remember this place, don’t you?” He asked.

A bitter laugh escaped your lips as you clicked your seatbelt, getting it off.

“I’m done” You said dryly as you opened the door and got out of the car.

“No, [Name]. Please, wait” He said as he mirrored your movements and excited the car walking around it.

“Of fuckign course I know where I am, Kento” You barked as you walked away approaching the door. “I know where I lost my fucking virginity, okay?” You barked as you stopped coldly and looked at him, tears finally streaming off your face. “Look, I’ll make us a favour and summarize this conversation. Yes, you’re a fucking asshole for just taking off one day and completely disappearing. Yes, I’m still mad about it. No, I won’t take your apology. No, I don’t care about whatever shitty excuse you have for me to listen to you. You bringing me here out of all places isn’t going to change shit…” You spat all in one breath as you stopped and took a deep breath.

“I loved you, Kento. I really did. And it hurt to have you just dissipate like you were a hallucination or something...You were my first kiss, my first love, my first everything! And one day I lost all of that. You ruined sex for me!” You yelled angrily. “I could never hold, kiss or sleep with anyone, because at some point I’d see your stupid face, and then be incredibly underwhelmed because I would not enjoy sex. I can’t feel anything anymore, Kento...The only way I can actually enjoy those things is by getting drunk or high” You admitted. “I can’t walk into bookstores, nor eat sandwiches or diet coke, nor drink tea because all those things remind me of you. And yes, it’s lame that all these years later I still care about those things. And this is why I can’t forgive you” You cried, as your voice shook.

Nanami’s heart broke little by little at each one of your words. He knew he’d screwed up and had hurt you deeply. But he wasn’t aware of the actual impact. He clenched his jaw as he felt his chest tight and a lump on his throat. Now the drinking problem made sense. Gojo had painted it like you were an alcoholic, but it wasn’t exactly the case. So you’d gone to the bar to get it off with some stranger, probably pretending it was him.

The dizzying pain and weight of his mistakes blinded him for a second as he walked towards you as you kept bitterly complaining. As you tried to walk away, you made a very poor effort as he caught up with you and cupped your face in his hands, bringing you closer to him and shutting you up by pressing his lips against you.

The sudden surprise made your heart stop. Your mind turning numb and blank at once as you struggled to bring yourself to push him away. However, truth be told, you didn't want to push him away. The poor attempt to push him away was more than obvious. The strong fighter you were, barely making any physical effort. Nanami's hands wrapped around your back and pulled you close, squeezing you against him as he sighed into the kiss.

Finally kissing him back, you locked your lips against his desperately, eager to taste the lips you've been dreading in your dreams. Clinging to him like he was going to disappear again, a soft whimper escaped your mouth. Your chest pressing against him as he felt his own world getting blurry.

He broke the kiss pulling away as he pressed his forehead against yours.

“You have no idea how much I missed you” He whispered as you clung to him.

“I-I…” You stuttered, the words tasting bitter before they even made it to your mouth. “Fuck, I want you, Kento” You growled as he pulled you in, kissing you hungrily again.

His hands posessively clinging to you as he slowly guided you back to the car. One step at the time as you both melted in a hungry sour kiss. As you ran out of breath, you pulled away, gasping for air as you gripped his collar in your hands.

“I can’t hold back anymore” You said as you pulled away and grabbed his hand, walking back to his car.

Your words unleashed a shiver down his spine as his heart skipped a beat and raced like crazy, as his pants started feeling tighter on his crotch. He chuckled softly as he realized his own judgement seemed to have disappeared with that first kiss. And before you could even make it to his car, he gripped your hips and spun you around as he bumped his forehead against yours.

“I can’t either” He admitted as he guided you to the car’s hood and pulled you over it. Ass you sat on the warm hood, he got between your legs and you wasted no time wrapping them around his waist. He grunted softly feeling your crotch against his as you pulled him closer to seal your lips together.

As you soon were absorbed by the dizziness of your rising heat, his hand went to your bare thighs as he slowly caressed your skin, going up and lifting your skirt up in the process. A soft moan slid into his mouth as he gripped your ass softly and squeezed it. The way your skin got covered in goosebumps and how you jerked your hips made him moan in response.

It felt good, and intoxicating. The driving desire burning his insides. The feeling of desiring to taste you all over and have you shaking underneath him. God, he’d missed that particular rush of adrenaline. His body reacting to the deeply buried memories now loose. He felt like he was in the best high he’d experienced. Lightheadedness and presence in the moment, he hadn’t felt this alive in so long.

Your hands were slowly undoing his buttoned shirt and were quick to explore his warm skin. He pulled away from the kiss, gasping as he looked at you. Your devilish smile matching your hungry stare. You leaned forward kissing his neck, nibbling on his skin every now and then. His hand gripped your hair tightly, pulling it lightly, making you look up at him as he stared at you.

He leaned forward, kissing you once more, this time a lot more slow and a lot more tender. It was sweet and it was slow and it took you by surprise. You felt his sweet kiss begging you, still holding on to the feelings you both decided to drown unsuccessfully. It almost hurt. It was the kind of kiss that told you how much you missed and needed each other. How much you regretted the mistakes you’ve done.

As you melted against his lips, his hands slowly slid your panties off. You helped him lifting your hips a little but as you giggled against his lips.

“Eager?” You said with a playful smirk.

“You have no idea” He replied as he took off your panties and shoved them in his back pocket.

His hand made it back to your thigh, slowly going up until he palmed your hot sex. Stealing a gasp out of your mouth, he teasingly ran one of his fingers through your dripping slit, making him smile satisfied.

“I’m not the only one, huh?” He said as you looked at him with lustful eyes.

You took his glasses off and set them aside. You were about to go back to kissing his neck when he slid one finger inside of you effortlessly. A rather loud moan escaped your lips as you shut your eyes closed feeling your entire body tingle in a way you hadn’t felt in years. You smiled satisfied as you continued kissing his neck. Slowly, he got another finger inside. The delicious stretch of his second finger prompting you to bite his neck softly making him growl your name softly. His fingers explored the whole he knew so well, as he found your sweet spot almost by muscle memory. More moans came out of your throat sounding like music to his ears.

“Fuck, Kento” You hissed as you took off your top, not caring that you were outdoors and by the road. Up to this point, you were so pent up, you simply craved him like you’d never craved anything before.

Nanami wasted no time and kissed your neck, going down to your neck, gently biting your skin every now and then. Sucking delicately on your skin, leaving marks that wouldn’t last long. He pulle dhis fingers out of you, clinging to your body desperately. As you laid on the car’s hood, you devoured him with your lustful eyes, begging him to get on top of you. Wearing just your skirt by this point, Nanami groaned at the plain sight of you.

He undid his belt and his pants. Your hands playfully teasing your own body in an attempt to drive him crazier and crazier. He cursed under his breath as he couldn’t take it any longer. He pulled his painfully hard erection out of his pants. You watched hi, intrigued, stretching your hands towards him, gently gripping his dick. His breath hitched and you smiled proudly.

Nanami leaned over the car hood, slowly getting on top of you, his shaft resting on your belly as he looked at how much deep could he go inside of you. His tip almost reaching you belly button, as the idea alone made a shiver run down his spine.

"Please, Kento" you gasped, need dripping from your voice as you caressed his dick

He growled softly as he pulled away softly, aligning against your entrance and slowly going in. You gasped, pushing your head back and pressing your hips against his making him go deeper.

Hissing your name, he jerked his hips, his tip.kissing your cervix as sudden rush of pain jolted through your body, followed by pleasure. You dug your nails in his shoulders as he thrusted back and forth, hitting all the right spots. The sound of his gasps and grunts hypnotizing as you got wetter by the second. His length coated in your juices, echoing in lewd wet noises.

He was rough. He usually was. Back in student days, he was particularly rough. As quiet and collected as he seemed, he sure got his stress out if his body through wild sex.

Relentlessly pushing against you, stretching you in such a delicious way only he knew how. Strong and aggressive movements as your walls swallowed him whole every time, breathless moans escaping your lips with every push. The cool wind kissing your skin, only enhancing his warmth.

As you felt your orgasm progressively approaching, the realization of how addicted you were to him hit you. He was everything you desired. And it was wrong. Before the feeling of uneasiness started to sink in, a sudden electric rush ran through your body. Painfully and soothing, as you tightly clenched around himbsoon numbed your mind.

As you came around him, your walls sucked him in tightly, as he was right over the brink, your velvet flesh pushed him off the edge. He didn't have time to pull out. And honestly, he didn't want to pull out. The way your walls milked him felt delicious. As he rode you through your orgasm, filling you up as his head felt dizzy and the world was spinning faster than usual. His hot seed coating your insides, as you shut your eyes closed, feeling the very last of your orgasm fading away.

He pressed his forehead against yours. Loud pants echoing.

However, the world didn't quite return to its regular focus.

The rest of the night went by in a fuzzy hot mess of events. You returned to his apartment and kept feasting on each other, making up for the lost time. Both of you incredibly starved and needy, you desperately went at it over and over again. It was a rather long night. As you feared, no one made you feel as he did. All of him was addicting. His smell, his voice, his warmth, his skin...It didn’t matter how many strangers you fucked, or how drunk or high you were, he felt just right. He made you cum so easily, it seemed ridiculous everyone else couldn’t.

But you knew it was far more than that.

You were still deeply in love with him. No wonder why he had that effect on you. Just hearing his breathlessly gasp was enough to have you soaking wet and under his mercy. Between sweet kisses, fake promises and sweaty sex, he quite literally fucked you to oblivion. Until either of you could take it any longer and you two fell asleep in each other’s arms. It had been a long tiring night, as you knew many of your muscles were gonna be sore the next day. Your chest painted in red and blue bruises.

It was possibly one of the best night sleeps he’d had. In such a long time. The uncomfortable hole in his chest didn’t feel so wide now. Just like you, he didn’t know how much he actually needed you until now. His regrets, his guilt, the thoughts haunting him on how much of a jerk he’d been when he simply took off...All those feelings went away for a night. As he tasted the wonders of the universe under your skin. Feeling ecstatic and euphoric for the first time in years. However, nothing could’ve prepared Nanami for what he was about to experience when he woke up.

~

“What the hell is this?” Gojo asked as he waved around the folder you’d left a few hours earlier in the Headmaster’s office.

“Why the fuck do you care?” You said as you grabbed it, ripping it off his hands.

“You’re seriously leaving for Kyoto?” He whined.

“So my transfer was accepted? Great!” You said sarcastically as you opened the folder and saw the Headmaster’s seal at the bottom.

“What about Nanami-kun?” Gojo replied as the very last string of your patience snapped.

“Oh, fuck you, Gojo! You tried to force us back together, but it’s not going to happen” You snapped. “I’m done. I’m done with him, and I’m done with you sticking your nose in my business”

“Do you really think that running away will solve anything? You’ll still be depressed as hell”

“The less I know about him, the better” You said as you turned around, hot tears blurring your sight as you headed with long steps towards your room. “I don’t trust myself around him…” You whispered. “He’s my weakness Gojo, I can’t let that happen…” You said coldly.

You’d left that morning very early, before Nanami woke up. And you left leaving no trace of you ever being there. Unintentionally doing the same he did. It was unintentional because you hadn’t done it out of spite. Your thought process had been simply. You preferred to not have that conversation and simply leave without him noticing. You had had the exact same thought process Nanami had had all those years ago.

You didn’t waste time and soon started packing your things to leave for Kyoto right away.

[meltwonu]

| 𝔲𝔫𝔱𝔦𝔩 𝔦 𝔪𝔢𝔱 𝔶𝔬𝔲 |     [Chapter 1] 

pairing; fratboy!wonwoo x reader

this chapter’s notes; fratboy!wonwoo, dom!wonwoo, dirty talk, masturbation, sex toys, mentions of sexting/sending photos/videos, baby this has hella plot lmao dkhf 🥴💕 WELCOME TO UNTIL I MET YOU!! THE MINI-SEQUEL TO CAFFEINE! A bit of a shorter chapter but I didn’t want to overload with too much everything in the first chapter, ykwim? 😎 Thank you so much for your patience with this sequel, I know there were a ton of people asking for a sequel for months after I said I would 💕😭😭 As always, inbox roundup tomorrow! And don’t forget, next chapter for UIMY goes up on Feb 26th! T|H ch 1 next Friday! 🥰💕 Enjoy ch 1, have a great weekend and I love you! 💕

chapters; 1 - x - x - x - x

“Mmh… Wonwoo…”

His hands roam all over your naked body; warmth spreading all over when he digs his blunt fingernails into the skin of your waist.

“Feels good, doesn’t it? Did you miss me, sweetheart?” His voice is soft, gentle, yet teasing; barely above a whisper as your back bows off of the bed to lean into his simple touches. “I missed you, sweetheart. Missed your ‘lil cunt too.”

A choked sob falls from your lips, followed quickly by rushed, hurried cries for Wonwoo to move faster.

“Don’t you want me to take my time? We haven’t seen each other in months.” 

There’s a smirk on his lips, eyes twinkling with mischief when you reply back with a shaky whine. “Don’t you want me to slide my cock into your pretty ‘lil pussy nice ‘n slow? Let you feel every inch of me filling you up, just like it’s the first time all over again.” He stares at you dreamily; fixated on the way your body chases his hands when he drags them down to your thighs. “Or would you prefer it if I fucked you hard and fast? Your cute body squirming and trembling from how good I give it to you and my cock slamming into your tight ‘lil cunt.”

Wonwoo’s fingertips spread your folds as he licks his lips; appreciating how wet you already were for him.

“Bet your toys don’t feel as good as the real thing, huh?”

You shake your head ‘no’ furiously, “N-no, god, no! Wonwoo, p-please!” The male grins down at you, pouting mockingly at your desperate, pleading eyes. 

The wetness between your legs is unbearable and the sobs are caught in your throat when Wonwoo leans over you, lips ghosting across your own.

“Okay. Just say--”

You’re shocked awake by your alarm clock; chest heaving in deep breaths as you sit up in your crumpled sheets. “Oh, fuck...” Groaning, your clammy palms reach for the ringing device as you shut it off and sigh.

The clock reads 10:02AM; tired eyes trying to blink away the sleep that threatens to take you back to the dreamland you much preferred. Although, dreaming about Wonwoo was becoming a little bit too common these last few days.

Sighing once more, you move to get out of bed; already finding your panties soaking wet and sticking to you like a second skin when you stand.

“Ugh... Damn it.”

You press the vibrator harder onto your clit; teeth chattering with the pleasure that pours over your body.

“Oh, god, please, p-please…”

Images of Wonwoo dance behind your eyelids; sultry smirks and teasing glances bringing you closer and closer to the edge of an orgasm.

If there was anything that the last few months without Wonwoo taught you, it was that you couldn’t afford to lose him - in more ways than one. And despite his lack of calls or even text messages, you held out in hopes he still felt the same way that you did despite the distance.

You sent him pictures and videos of yourself often; teasing images half naked, toys in hand, and videos crying out his name while you came. And while he took the time to reply to those with praise and adoration, he almost never sent anything back. 

When he did, it was always short, clipped replies of how exhausted he was and how he didn’t have much time.

“Ngh, h-harder…” Your toes curl against the bedsheet; phantom feelings of his cock fucking you hard and deep making you cry out in desperation to be filled by his cock.

Your phone rings on the nightstand next to you as you cum - vibrator pressed so hard against your clit that your back bows off of the sheets while your thighs shake uncontrollably. 

And for the first time in a long time, it’s an orgasm that feels like it’s worth something.

‘Gyu: hey did wonwoo text u?

‘Gyu: he’s back next monday he said

‘Gyu: idk abt classes tho, might be out of commission for a while bc jetlag

‘Gyu: thinking abt throwing him a party on friday after he comes back...

‘Gyu: u wanna plan with us orrrrr? U got a private party or sth 🥴😏

‘Gyu: lmk

You’re nervous. Shy, even.

After you’d come down from your orgasm and checked your phone, your mind momentarily went blank from shock and the first thing you’d done was text Wonwoo to ask if he was really coming back that soon.

‘Ah, yeah, I was just about to text you. Prof said we can go home early if we wanted since we finished up classes. I’ll see you sometime next week? Jetlag and stuff.’, was all he had said and in your excited state, the only thing you had responded with was an, ‘Okay, great!’, without asking when, where, or what time.

You figured you’d give him some time to readjust instead of bombarding him as soon as he got in. But each second that you knew Wonwoo was home, you found yourself itching to just be in his presence.

You just had to be a little more patient.

Wednesday morning comes and you find yourself skipping your morning class to go to the library.

For studying, you tell yourself.

The male at the receptionist table shoots you a small smile to which you awkwardly smile back before ducking into an empty aisle. All you knew was that it seemed like Wonwoo wasn’t here.

Maybe he’s still at the frat house, you wonder.

Sighing slightly under your breath, you decide that maybe getting some work done would actually help distract you from looking for the male.

You find an empty table, setting your things down before pulling out your phone. 

In all honesty, you weren’t even sure why you were being so shy and nervous about contacting Wonwoo, especially when you so unabashedly sent him nudes every few days when he was away. 

Although, with how things had been before he left and the prospect of actually dating once he came back from his semester abroad - the butterflies in your stomach had been nonstop with the different scenarios that played out in your head. You’d even gone so far as to plan what happened if Wonwoo had decided he didn’t want to make an attempt at dating you.

“Sweetheart?”

The grip you have on your phone only tightens as you whip your head around to find Wonwoo standing behind your chair and you swear your heart stops beating the same time your breath gets caught in your throat. “H-huh?”

He smiles gently down at you and you can’t help but wonder how long you were spaced out to not notice him there. 

“Is this a dream too?” You wonder aloud - Wonwoo chuckling in response as he moves to collect your things for you.

“Have you been dreaming about me that much, sweetheart?” You stutter and stumble over your words; embarrassment eating at you every second that Wonwoo has a knowing smile plastered on his lips.

“C’mon, let’s go get something to eat since we both know you’re not really here to study.”

The version of Wonwoo that sits across the cafe table is… different.

Not bad, just different.

His arms are much tanner and definitely more muscular and the glasses missing from his face lets you appreciate his eyes even more when they’re not hidden behind the thick frames. He had even opted to wear a sleeveless shirt; something that you weren’t used to when he usually was around campus in long sleeves and sweater vests.

Although, you can’t and won’t deny the way your body reacts to this Wonwoo.

“Hey, I’m talking to you and you’re just spacing out.” Muttering, he leans over the small cafe table until his face is only inches away from yours and the smirk on his lips already lets you know that you’ve been caught staring.

“Listen, I know I’ve been gone for three months but you’re lookin’ at me like you haven’t had a fix in all that time.” Your lips press into an embarrassed firm line, avoiding his stare as he raises a brow at you.

“Wait, you didn’t fuck anyone in the three months I was gone?”

“No… did you?” Your voice is barely above a whisper; a little afraid that his answer will be ‘yes’ when he takes a second longer to respond.

“Nah,” He settles back into his seat, “I told you, didn’t I? I was willing to try the whole… dating, relationship thing with you when I got back. Although, I’m somewhat surprised one of the others didn’t try to seduce you while I was gone.”

You laugh slightly, cheeks warm as Wonwoo teases. “I wouldn’t have given them the time of day anyway.”

Your entire body burns hot, palms clammy in your lap from how giddy you were to be with Wonwoo and it made your heart do backflips knowing that he’d still been willing to try with you.

“Ah, how was it abroad anyway? You… didn’t really say much over the past few months so I feel like I don’t know how you were. Just some messages about how tired you were...” He takes a sip of his coffee; unintentionally making you internally scream when his lips form a pout while he thinks.

“Honestly? Other than the days we were excavating ‘n stuff, it was pretty boring. Really hectic though, and a lot of documenting which meant a lot of paperwork. I swear, I closed my eyes and I saw the inside of my textbooks.” He chuckles lightly, eyes focused on the cup of coffee in front of him.

“I just want to say sorry for my lack of communication. I really didn’t expect to be so busy that I couldn’t even pick up a call.” There’s a genuine apologetic look on Wonwoo’s face when he looks back at you. “And the time difference was really rough too. I didn’t want to take it out on you over the phone if I was stressed about not sleeping or the workload. I know we can get a little rough when we ‘play’ but this wasn’t that and it wouldn’t have been fair.”

Oh.

“T-that’s okay, I understand!” Your heart does somersaults in your chest, “I--thank you for thinking about me too.”

The feelings you have bubbling up inside of you make you feel like you’re falling in love for the first time, all over again. “Um… Sorry I sent so many pictures ‘n stuff.”

Wonwoo laughs, this time throwing his head back slightly before he tries to hide his wide grin. “Oh, sweetheart. Don’t apologize.” Your eyes meet his and for a split second, you see the familiar dominating look in his eyes before he leans over the small cafe table again.

“I might’ve not had all the time to entertain you those times but I thought about you alllll the time. I missed everything about you.” His voice is barely above a whisper - careful to not let anyone else in the cafe hear the topic of conversation. “Which, by the way…You piqued my interest earlier with your question. You never really answered my question about having dreams about me.”

You shift in your seat as you avert your eyes from his; eyes flitting down his toned body instead as you mentally curse yourself.

“I… kinda? I m-mean… not normally but just--just these last few days. It’s almost been every night… I wake up and--and it’s just… I’m...” You trail off; somewhat shy to say the rest of what you were going to say even though you’re almost certain Wonwoo already knows.

“Odd. Me too. I kept dreaming about you, which is, honestly, kind of why I thought to come back earlier.”

“Oh?”

“Mm, we still had 2 weeks left, technically. A bit of a spillover since my professor wanted us to explore the city once finals were over. But I just wanted to come home.” He finishes with a chuckle - a soft look in his eyes.

You pout back at him, “You didn’t come home early just for ‘lil ‘ol me, did you?” You say it jokingly, but deep down you do wonder.

“Would that be so bad?” Grinning, Wonwoo sets a couple of bills down onto the table to cover the meals you both barely have touched.

“Like I said, I missed everything about you, sweetheart.”

Wonwoo walks you back to your place afterwards; laughing and joking with you as if he hadn’t been gone for the last 3 months. 

There’s a certain playfulness about him that makes your heart bloom and part of you wonders if he’s opening up to you more now that there’d been some time apart.

“Are you gonna be working at the library again? Or is that done forever now?” “Mm.. I mean, it’d be kind of weird if I stopped, don’t you think?”

The grin of his face is telling and you have to mentally stop yourself from letting your mind wander in the middle of the sidewalk. “Y-yeah... Studying in my apartment isn’t really the same, y’know…”

Laughing, Wonwoo takes the opportunity to swing an arm around your shoulder as he tucks you under his arm. “I was actually at the library earlier to ask about my position back. I start tomorrow.” Goosebumps rise on your skin and the close proximity is enough to make you whimper.

“I’m only taking two classes this semester to give myself a bit of a break so I’ll be in the library more often to fill up the time. You can always call me if you need to know where I am. I promise I’ll respond this time, sweetheart.”

Before you know it, the two of you are already standing outside of your complex as Wonwoo takes his arm off of you.

“Will I be seeing you tomorrow?” There’s a hopeful lilt to his voice that has you nodding feverishly in return.

“I have a morning class but I’ll come by in the afternoon? I can text you to let you know, just in case.” You offer back.

Wonwoo licks his lips, tilting his head before leaning down and kissing you on the forehead.

The soft gesture momentarily throws you off as you freeze but the smoldering look in Wonwoo’s eyes when he pulls away lets you know that he’s already scheming.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, sweetheart.”

[bossthebicon]

Okay so I started the Warp Effect a few days ago, I saw it going around on this platform when it was airing but I didn’t start because there was a lot of BL airing that I was watching at that time and to be honest straight-leaning drama (even if I knew there was GL and BL rep) is no longer my thing. However I decided to give a try because I have seen glowing reviews and now I come to you because obviously as I am late with the watching, there are not much people talking about it and there is an aspect of this show that deeply bothered me and I wanted to talk with someone. I found the Alex/jean storyline really upsetting. I thought that Jean and the situation as a whole was extremely, extremely unfair. It might be the biggest form of gaslighting that I probably have ever seen in media.

First of all, I don’t consider that Jean was R-word by Alex that night and that’s a big issue because it shouldn’t be up to debate but clear for the viewers and I have seen multiple viewers debating about it. It’s not that Alex didn’t listen to her when she told him to get off, it’s that he either couldn’t hear what she was saying or understand because immediately after he fell into unconsciousness because he was too drunk and that should have been the focus of this storyline ; I mean it kind of was touched upon but it should have been the theme of their storyline, how drunken sex is not safe and can lead to multiple issue as consent is not being given fully by the TWO PARTIES as they are too drunk.

However for this storyline, Alex was blamed for the pictures being taken of her and going public, he was blamed for being drunk when she was as drunk, he was being blamed for not being there for her when she got pregnant when she never told him, he was blamed for absolutely everything and I don’t think it’s right. I understand what they were trying to do with this storyline but it was poorly made in my opinion and once again seeing the viewers reaction to it because I went to check the comments to get my head around this confirm to me that this was poorly executed as it’s going all over the place : multiple people understood things differently, they saw the storyline differently than others did and for me the education part is losing its meaning if viewers can’t comprehend fully. It just doesn’t give feminist storyline with male accountability that I am sure they wanted to do, it’s giving a woman is the responsibility of a man in every situation because honestly that’s how they made Jean see things, Alex was supposed to be responsable for her in everything and to stop her when he was as drunk when she gave consent. That’s what he is doing in the future but that’s because he already know the situation and was gaslighted to being the sole responsible. And that’s not education for me.

Sorry it got longer than what I wanted to say, I know you probably don’t remember everything as it ended two months ago but I can’t wait to have your opinion on this.

hi, so I've talked many times about the alex/jean storyline kinda ruining the show for me on my blog (I still love the show, but less than what could've been), but I think your ask is very interesting bc it put its finger where I couldn't. I was bothered about alex hurting jean in that way but also couldn't call it r*pe as it's clear in the show he's just way too drunk & didn't hear her, yet this is still a fucked up scene to witness & makes the viewer rightfully uncomfy. imo alex was definitely blamed for everything as a sort of plot device to advance the show, but moreover my issues with the jean/alex storyline was that 1) they ended together despite it all, when it's okay to end up in bad terms, especially for a high school romance, & 2) the entire universe that we saw in the show when they're 30 is rendered useless once alex goes back & changes the past, which felt very empty for me. and yes, while I think the education aspect is very good for the other characters, there's no lesson to be taken from jean & alex. bc the thing is, when you drunkenly violate consent like alex did & give the woman lifelong ptsd like jean had, you don't get to go back in time & make that not happen. you have to live with the consequences of your action and take responsibility, even if you didn't intend for it to happen. so yeah, the warp effect was good & very important for many topics imo, but not the alex/jean storyline.

xxx

[stargaze-issei]

— "𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐦𝐞" (𝐛. 𝐤𝐚𝐭𝐬𝐮𝐤𝐢 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫)

𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐭; bakugou and you had been dating for so long, but always had to hide it. he hates hiding you, he hates seeing you sad, and you don’t know how much more you can take.

𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞; a little bit of angst at first, but then fluff.

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬; bc… him.

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭; 2.0k

it had been a long day at your agency, longer than usual at least. a lot of little incidents in your patrol areas, meetings, reports waiting for you to give them a final look. you checked the watch on your desk, almost midnight. by then, only the guards must have been in the building. a long, heavy sigh left your lips. you still had work to do, but the urge to go home was bigger, so after taking your things, you drove home, eager to see your boyfriend. bakugou mananged to get himself the title of number one hero four years after graduation, surpassing even all might himself. seeing him achieve his dreams filled your heart with love and pride, though it still hurt not being able to share those feelings with the world.

on your second year at u.a., katsuki asked you on a date after months of notorious flirting, no one was really surprised, in fact, among your class, everyone was happy because of your influence in the boy. your honey moon period was interrupted a few months later, on what was class a’s last sports festival. as third years already, all the attention was laid on you and your classmates. hundreds of pro heroes expecting to catch the most promising graduates, and your last chance to show you worthy. on every phase, you and bakugou would share knowing glances, secret winks at each other, little reassuring smiles from you and calming head nods from him. with all those cameras making you the center of attention, it wasn’t too hard for people to figure out what was going on between both of you. you ended sixth, only surpassed by uraraka, kirishima, todoroki, midoriya and bakugou, and were really happy with your performance. that same night, after a celebration with all your friends at the dorm, you went into your boyfriend’s room.

he was laying in bed, reading a book, but still reached out to pull you into bed. “mind if i use your computer?” you asked, him humming in agreement, too focused to pay you more attention. first you checked your personal account, when nothing entertainment surge there, you opened your official hero account. as you expected, the festival just endign a few hours ago, the tags were exploding. your face completely change when you started to read.

“so, are we just ignoring the fact that Y/N of all people was making eyes at bakugou the ENTIRE TIME?? keep it in your pants geez”.

“i’m sorry but if you think that bakuy/n thing wasn’t a stunt, you’re wrong”.

“guys. it’s as simple as looking at y/n, and then looking at ✨bakugou✨”.

“yeah it’s a no for me, like ok they’re friends but don’t make it fucking disgusting”.

and you could keep going. most of them were about how someone as great as katsuki could never lay his eyes on you, fewer were about how he was too aggressive and violent for you, and some were just people hating on both of you. tears gather in your eyes, was this what everyone thought? you knew from the beginning the difference between bakugou katsuki and you, who was lucky to even had made it that far, but you didn’t realise just how big the difference was. katsuki immediately felt something was off, so he left his book aside and grabbed your hand.

“i…” was all you managed to say before bursting in tears. bakugou hugged you as fast as he could, whispering softly calming words and leaving small kisses in your head. slowly, he took away the computer to see what made you so upset. blood starting to boil in his veins, his whole self shaking in pure rage. he got up, leaving you in the bed, still a little teary.

“i’m going to kick those losers to the moon, who the fuck are they to say those things? fucking bastards, i’ll shove their words so up thei–” he was walking back and forward in the small space of his room, stopped only when he saw you crying even harder.

“am i really th–that unworthy of you?” the voice crack made his heart break “i know i’m not perfect but i really thought that… that…” bakugou kneeled before you, looking at you dead in the eye. his hands gently reached your wet cheeks.

“don’t say dumb shit, dumbass. you are the most perfect person on this fucking planet, no one, not even youself, can say shit about that, ya’ hear me?” he did his best to calm himself down, knowing that you needed his comfort more than ever.

he took away the laptop before going into bed with you, holding you tightly in his arms. you were still crying, completely unable to get those words out of your mind. you loved katsuki, that you were sure, and he made clear several times that he loved you too, why didn’t people understand that? why it wasn’t enough?.

the next day, aizawa told both of you that in order to keep your mental health, at least until you graduate, to not make it official. he explained how sometimes, pro heroes had to keep their private life in check just to make things a little easier, as unfair as it sounds. so you waited, you graduate and held the impulse of kissing your boyfriend, hugging him, even look at him. it’s okay, only a few more days. katsuki sign a contract for two years with best jeanist, the number three hero at the time. you, on the other hand, had been offered to work with the lurkers, a team conformed by edgeshot, their leader, kamui woods and mt. lady, signing a similar contract to your boyfriend’s. you were overflowed with happiness, your dream had come true, finally you could call yourself a pro hero. you weren’t an intern, you were their equal.

“look, you are a great hero, but you are just starting” edgeshot had call you into his office, the manager of public interactions was next to him, talking to you “i did my research, and i’m going to have to ask you to keep this relationship of yours with ground zero a secret. you have so much potential, you need to leave a good impression or your hardwork would be for nothing.” you looked at your boss, seeing the uncomfortable look on his face. no one liked to ask those things, but sometimes there were sacrifices to be made.

“i have to talk with him first” was all you could say.

it killed you. not being able to love katsuki, to live a secret. most of the time all you wanted to do was scream in the middle of the street, where everyone could hear you. you loved bakugou katsuki, and he loved you, you wanted to spend you whole life with him, without hiding, without lies, without wondering if you were good enough for him. but it couldn’t be. now, four years later, both of you with your own agencies and a steady career, it still couldn’t be. again and again, no matter how many advisors you hired, everyone reached the same conclusion.

katsuki was waiting for you in the couch, watching a movie. instantly, you crawled to his arms, searching for reassurance. at least he was still the same.

“oi, are you okay?” even if his voice came out harshly, you knew he worried.

“i’m tired” you hid your face in his neck, intertwining your legs with his. you didn’t want to cry, but it was impossible to keep all the tears from falling.

“look at me” he said, lifting your face from your chin “what is it?” his eyes creeped inside yours, you hated making him worry, he lived the exact same things you did, but there you were the only one crying.

“i’m tired of this, bakugou” to hear his last name coming from you froze him in his place, what? tired of what? of him? you wanted to break up? “i can’t do it anymore” the way you grabbed his hand gave him confusing signs. “i want to go out with you, to hold your hand in public, i wanna kiss you and hug you whenever i want to, fuck, i want a normal relationship”

oh. it was that. bakugou sighed, a bit relieved. he understood, it was hard on him too, but at the same time, was all both of you knew. your relationship never had a normal phase, he couldn’t even remember the last date you had. how could he miss something he never had? of course, you were different. for some reason, the media had always been harsher on you. if it wasn’t your love life, it was your hero costume, or the way you did your job, how you didn’t have children, that forever tired face you got, they’d always find a new thing to complain. but you had your own fanbase, a lot of people who supported you, not for nothing you were the number four hero. being honest, katsuki didn’t know what to say. he hated seeing you like that, after all those years.

“let’s go out” he talked while getting up from the couch, lifting you with him “put on something comfy, hurry” when he saw you staring blankly at him, he took you from your legs as a bag of potatos “dammit, woman”.

once you got out of your surprise, you did as you were told after your boyfriend left you on the bed. his eyes glowed with a different shine, one that had disappeared a long time ago.

you got in his car, him driving. katsuki seemed happy, and that eased your anxiety. after a while, he parked in the middle of town. despite of the hour, there was a lot of people there, just as he expected.

“we can’t do this” you said, still a bit doubtful.

“of course we can, i’m going out with my girlfriend, i’m going to hold her hand, and i’m going to kiss her whenever the fuck i want, because she’s the baddest bitch out there and doesn’t deserves to be hidden from anyone”.

he said that. your heart raced, your cheeks heated up, what was going on? your belly had a thousand butterflies trying to escape. he said that. for the first time in five years, you kissed him without double thinking. a kiss filled with loved, confidence, feelings you couldn’t even describe.

he got out of the car first and opened your door, reaching out a hand. you were together in this, whatever happened wouldn’t be as bad, because you had him. there wasn’t anything else you needed but bakugou katsuki.

he explained what he planned while driving, you were going to go to every store you wanted, holding hands, sharing kisses. you were going to take pictures and share them with the world. you wanted an ice cream? then both of you would walk the entire tokyo to get you one, not minding the looks, the whispering. this was you and him.

and you did, you spent the most awesome night together, phones exploding with calls of both of you agencies. it didn’t matter.

you ended in a viewpoint, sitting in the back of your car watching the sun rise. a blanket provided the warm lacking from you bodies, even though you were cuddling. every time bakugou was at peace with you, unconsciously started to sing under his breath, in a really low voice. feeling his chest under your skin, his fingers tangled in your head, hearing his deep melodic voice. that’s how you wanted to spend your life.

“marry me” he said, his heart didn’t even race its pace. he was so calm, because he knew that your love was mutual. “c'mon, dumbass, marry me”.

“i love you” was all that left your mouth. he took it as a yes, and he was right. a soft smile curved in his lips, you were his, and he was entirely yours.