#i will go back to attorney posting after this just humor me

[sceebybeeby]

this is a post for 12 year old me and 12 year old me ONLY, if you're not her keep scrolling /j

(pssst doodle/lineup under here)

[rachelsnotebook]

A Look Back At The Games of 2023

There's always too many games and not enough hours in a year, but I refuse to let that stop me from celebrating the games that were important to me over the course of 2023.

The Games I LOVED in 2023:

(In no particular order)

Atelier Ryza: Ever Darkness & The Secret Hideout (released September 26, 2019)

This game spoke to me on so many levels: the lonely childhood, the frustrations at home, the desire to prove myself, the dreams of adventure, a craving to learn, an enchantment with magic.

How could I not fall in love with these characters? I wish this game came into my life so much sooner.

Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney (released October 12, 2001)

Now, this is a game series that missed me entirely. It wasn't until I was an adult with internet access that I was briefly introduced to Phoenix Wright. Right away I knew I liked the style of humor, but I still didn't feel compelled to give the series a try any time soon.

Flash forward to 2023... I picked up the available Ace Attorney games on the 3DS eshop before it died. So, when I found myself on an airplane for the first time I decided to keep the ball rolling. I booted up the first Ace Attorney, and I get it now. This game is an experience. And I love it dearly!

A Date with Death (Dec 7, 2023)

Now, an important note here is that I still haven't played the full game. I had planned on it by the time I finished getting this massive post written, but I put my focus into playing the other submissions in the Velox Turbo Jam.

The demo though... that I played. A lot. The concept, game mechanics, the art, everything is simply amazing to interact with. How do you not fall in love with this game? Grimmy is so funny (and HOT). I'm looking forward to exploring this game fully in the new year!

Sonic Frontiers (released November 8, 2022 & story dlc September 28, 2023)

I've been playing Sonic for as far back as I can remember, and Frontiers might be my personal favorite of the bunch. It was a joy to explore and experiment with the new mechanics. And I know it's far from perfect. I'm not blind, but I'm not heartless either. Sometimes all you can do is laugh and move on. Over the course of my experience playing, every mechanic and level was accessible. That journey was where I fell in love with Frontiers.

The story dlc was everything I wanted. I'm so happy we got to play as Amy, Tails, and Knuckles! The controls again, aren't perfect, but I'm grateful and thrilled that this content exists at all.

Xenoblade 3 DLC Future Redeemed (released April 25, 2023)

Future Redeemed is my personal game of the year. No question.

If you have a spare hour or two, I do highly recommend looking up on youtube the journey and evolution of the Xeno games. The story of creator, Tetsuya Takahashi, is really cool!

But in short: he kept striving to tell an incredibly complex RPG that would span several games and thousands of years of in game lore. He had a vision that publishers just didn't share. That led him to form his own studio, but he couldn't bring his original IP with him. He had to start again, and one more time after that when Nintendo finally acquired his studio.

The Xenoblade Trilogy is actually six games in disguise. The dlc story content for each game exists as it's own game. The campaigns are significantly shorter, but they're games that stand on their own, 100%.

Future Redeemed was released as the finale to the overarching plot (the Klaus Saga), and this marked the first time that Tetsuya Takahashi was able to bring one of his Xeno plots to a close on his own terms. Xenoblade is still going to continue, but this plot can rest easy.

For the most part. FR still left plays with tons of questions, but it did it's job beautifully. It honored the past games and looked to the future, and I loved every piece of it.

And most remarkably, it also kicked the door down for Tetsuya Takahashi's older IPs to return to the story. It's unclear right now how and when, but the future is so very bright for some incredible games to get another chance to shine.

Splatoon 3 (released September 9, 2022)

I spent a lot of time playing Splatoon this year. Am I good at it? No! But I love this game with my whole heart.

Intertwine (released July 2023)

Will I ever shut up about Intertwine? Hopefully no! I highly recommend checking out the post I made going into detail on this game.

Intertwine stole my heart. It's a fun game that feels deeply special. You'll laugh, you'll cry, and most of all... you'll fall in love with Van.

The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog (Mar 31, 2023)

A small team put this game together for April Fools and I owe them my life! This is one of my favorite things that happened this year.

If you missed it, for April Fools Sega dropped an entire Sonic the Hedgehog visual novel. And it's AMAZING.

Coral Island (Nov 14, 2023)

The children who grew up on Bokujō Monogatari are rapidly creating their own farming games. Stardew Valley is the most famous game to come from that group and it's inspiring even more people.

Now, as someone who has likely spent years of their life playing their favorite farming games again, and again... I tend to be picky about what I want from a farming game. I have a clear vision in mind for my dream game.

And Coral Island is really close to that dream! There's a ton of love and careful thought put into the art, the story, and the characters. I can't wait to keep playing and discovering new mechanics and secrets.

Suika game (December 9, 2021)

I love puzzle games! And I was sold on this game instantly.

I may have also bought it from the Japanese eshop some time before it was even announced for a North America release...

Titan Arum (released August 2023)

This game came into my life at a time when I badly needed a distraction. And Titan Arum delivered!

Titan Arum is a visual novel with three love interests, and nothing is as it seems. It's so incredibly cool, and I can't believe that I get to be friends with the devs. This game is a massive home run.

The art, the UI, the story... omg we could be here all day discussing everything. There's a ton to chew on and I don't want to spoil a single thing. Trust me on this, just play it.

Yakuza 0 (released March 12, 2015)

I'm still working my way through this one. Yakuza games are known for their length and I'm not interested in rushing any part of it.

My journey so far has been a ton of fun. There's so much detail injected into the world and the characters that I sometimes find it difficult to put the game down. I love the balance of seriousness and silliness. We need more of that in games.

I can't wait to keep on fighting with Kiryu in 2024.

The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom (released May 12, 2023)

Tears of the Kingdom is easily one of the best games of 2023, and in general. The mechanics they got working are incredible! I'm perpetually in awe by my own puzzle solutions and the clips I've seen of others. It's a truly amazing game.

There's little I can say that others haven't. And to be honest I'm still after all these months, collecting my thoughts on this game. I love TOTK, but I do have a few issues with it. So stay tuned for that post in 2024...

Games that released / released a demo in 2023 that are on my RADAR:

Again, I wish on every star that I had more hours in a day so I could play every game that catches my eye. These are the ones I'm jumping on the opportunity as soon as possible!

-Baldur's Gate 3

Yominokuni

Slay the Princess

Curse Crackers: For Whom the Belle Toils

Thirsty Suitors

In Stars and Time

Dicentra

Little Goody Two Shoes

Mario + Rabbids Sparks of Hope - DLC 3

Other Game related media from 2023 that I want to acknowledge:

Sega has been really knocking it out of the park with their Sonic the Hedgehog content:

(There's too much to link to directly so I'm posting my personal favorites)

Tails Tube

Dr. Eggman takes over Lego

Sonic Symphony events

The added Frontiers content:

Sonic Superstars animated content

Sonic Dream Team animation

The incredible announcement for The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog

I also must emphasize this praise is for the hardworking teams at Sega. If you haven't been following their unionizing efforts I recommend checking this out:

The IDW Sonic Comics! They're a ton of fun and I look forward to them every month.

Atelier Ryza had a big year of added content. The trilogy wrapped and I'm still emotional watching this video they released to visually recap the story.

Ryza also received an anime adaption of the first game. I'm in North America and I watched all of it on crunchyroll. It was a really well done adaption of the first part of the game. I hope it comes back for a season 2, because there's a ton more I want to see animated.

I'm a huge Fire Emblem Heroes addict and I'm always shocked how much original content in that mobile game flies under the radar. The movies for each new story milestone are often really cool.

[I hit an insert video limit so please copy and paste, and check that playlist out!]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B5bIw5CyOLE&list=PLqP2A2xeRzdS3MjLNZvmZnWFYf_zwZqwq&ab_channel=NintendoMobile

I almost made it to the end before I hit the limit!

I can't thank you enough if you made it down to this point. This post spiraled out of control... and somehow this is still it reigned in.

It's almost 9pm on New Years Eve and I just want this post done. So if there are errors, I'm sorry. I tried. I fell into writing as if I'm talking to you directly and I like that level of comfort for a fun post like this one.

Have a Happy New Year!!!

[dysco-lymonade]

12 and 20 for ankle monitor because these just scream Lexa for obvious reasons

I really love your clexa headcanons 🥰

I’m cringing so hard while I write fumbling Lexa, knowing full well that she’s soon going to be getting railed by Clarke.

Again, these posts aren’t linear. I’m a hot mess so bear with me.

This one is set after this prompt where Lexa finally learns Clarke’s name.

12 and 20 nervous embarrassment and clumsy attempts at flirting

Lexa makes it two days before going back to Sky Mart. She’s going to be an attorney for fucks sake, she’s going to face bigger challenges than minor embarrassment.

With her head held high, she rounds the corner to the store.

And proceeds to trip over a sign she swears wasn’t there two days ago.

She rights herself quickly, praying to a higher power that nobody saw her fumble.

“Not my best work, but you didn’t have to demolish it.” No such luck.

Is it too late to make a run for it?

She looks up when she hears a raspy voice she would recognize anywhere. Thankfully, Clarke looks amused as she holds the door open to the store.

“I am so sorry.” Lexa knows her face is beet red. “I swear I’m not usually such a mess.” She’s destined for failure, she should give up while she’s ahead. “Somehow this only happens around you.” That was a dumb thing to say.

It seems to catch Clarke’s attention though, if her smirk is any inclination.

“Should I be flattered, or offended?” She pulls the door open further, tossing a casual arm inside to usher Lexa in.

“Offend- No? No! I’m just distracted. Lots going on, you know?” Smooth.

Clarke gives a noncommittal hum. “And here I thought I was special.” She fucking winks.

Lexa trips through the doorway.

Clarke catches her by the shoulders, and saves her from smashing her face into the door. Lexa kind of wishes she would have let her fall, put her out of her misery.

“You’re making a habit of this.” Clarke tsks.

Lexa says the first thing that comes to mind, “I guess I just can’t help falling for you.” And mentally face palms.

It pulls a guttural laugh from Clarke as she helps steady Lexa on her feet.

Oh? She likes shitty pick-up lines, does she? Lexa may have a chance after all.

Releasing Lexa from her hold, Clarke asks, “So, Don Juan, can I help you find anything?”

“Definitely not coffee. But I could use a snack, something sweet, maybe?” Lexa shoots her an overly enthusiastic wink, playing along with her teasing.

Another laugh from Clarke. Lexa mentally pats herself on the back for at the very least humoring this poor soul she can’t seem to stay away from.

“Maybe some water? You seem pretty thirsty.” Clarke smirks as she walks away to the register, leaving Lexa to her own devices.

[hychlorions]

If you had to rank each Apollo Justice case on a 10-point scale, what would your ratings be?

honestly i like them all so much and it's been a while since i've last played AA4 so it's hard to give an answer without having to sit down and think about it :"D but assuming you wanna sit down for something long-ish, i'll start them all off on a perfect 10 and here's what i'd give deductions for:

Turnabout Trump (4-1) - i'd leave it at a 10 tbh. absolutely banger case for setting the tone for the rest of the game. i don't recall anything i disliked about it atm so i'm assuming there's nothing at all :>

Turnabout Corner (4-2) - hickfield/hotti existence. get him outta here! but on the other hand there's an exchange about klavier pausing a world tour to see the little boy that bested his brother that can mean different things depending on if you're playing the game for the first time or if you're replaying it. on first playthrough i assumed the judge's shock at klavier returning meant he hasn't taken another case since kristoph's arrest in 4-1, which. fair i guess bc prosecutors probably take cases more regularly than the waa in-universe but it's nothing to blink twice about yknow. HOWEVER replaying it after having gone through 4-4 (esp given how he mentions the gavinners to the judge) it starts to seem as if klavier ran off with his band for seven years and didn't come back until after his brother was arrested. which. >:3 hehe

-3 points for creep factor. +1 however for the simple joy of making me tear my hair out over klavier's mystery hiatus length

Turnabout Serenade (4-3) - people give this case too much shit tbh. it's the funniest case in the game and you guys just have no sense of humor 😭 me, lover of comedy, however, can appreciate it for what it is, and it's that 4-3 is the best demonstration of aa's sense of humor. my only gripe with it is that daryan's mentioned to be the first detective klavier's ever worked with. however in turnabout succession the detective shown in the flashback for the gramarye trial (klavier's courtroom debut) isn't daryan, but gumshoe. this isn't elaborated upon any further, so i am sitting here. wondering what mystery case klavier worked on that got resolved without going to court wherein daryan is the detective AND happened before the gramarye trial. i understand prosecutors but WHY pray tell are they shoving 17 year-olds into a detective position on the police force. god.

-2 for in-universe labor laws implications. +2 for klavier's weird forehead obsession (he has about three lines about apollo's forehead) and also the fact that this case has the most canonical uses of herr forehead out of all the cases in the entire ace attorney series at ~61 uses out of the total 129 (including DD). +1 more for being so rife with lines you could use as basis for headcanons ("straight except when he's depressed" "i should've learned to play guitar" "her quiet, deep song glides through the air... lilting above a sparse, but elegant piano accompaniment" i'm so sorry as a klapollo enthusiast this is the case of all time to me)

Turnabout Succession (4-4) - gorl you know the last case of the series has to be the most nailbiting one. such is the case for turnabout succession... if only the mason system didn't royally succ. do you know how hard it is to piece together the timeline for post- and pre-gramarye trial for someone like me?!?! (is forgetful) not to mention the fact that kristoph has apparently only met vera once but already knew she bites her nails when she's nervous? did you put a camera in their house or something? weirdo. however only in burning piles of rubble will real gems reveal themselves. *holding up the scene where zak explains the gramarye powers to phoenix, subsequently revealing the trucy-apollo siblingisms all along* isn't she beautiful?

-4 for being an inconvenient pain in the ass and kristoph's nail polish murder plot that crumbles under a magnifying glass and kristoph's stalking extent implications. +1 for bracelet lore you know i love me some bracelet mechanics (taps my homemade "THE BRACELET DOESN'T TIGHTEN" sign like a proud father)

Final answer:

4-3: 11/10

4-1: 10/10

4-2: 8/10

4-4: 7/10

[bamababygirl7]

🥰💞 I was tagged by the awesome and super gorgeous @angelsleaze

1. Are you named after anyone?

I wasn’t named after anyone. My name is pretty unique (I’m pretty sure my parents were on drugs lol)

2. Last time you cried?

Yesterday when I saw a post from @mister-s0013 about a 4 year old dying after an exorcism so I googled it and found way too many cases of this happening. Children are my soft spot.

3. Do you have/want kids?

I am a proud boy mom 💙💙💙 I wanted a little girl so badly, but after having nieces, I am so thankful that I didn’t have a daughter. I think they come out of the womb with an attitude lol

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot?

Me sarcastic??? NEVER lol

5. What's the first thing you notice about people?

Their sense of humor (if they have a dark sense of humor and/or love memes, they are automatically my bestie) Also, one of the first things I notice is how their mind works. I am drawn to people who are brutally honest like me (don’t just tell me what I want to hear) and who are passionate about certain things but not judgmental and like to discuss different subjects even if we don’t agree on them because I learn a lot from listening to different perspectives on subjects. (I’m a huge nerd and love learning)

6. What's your eye color?

My eyes are hazel. They are usually more green, but it depends on what I’m wearing, and they can get really blue when I cry.

7. Scary movies or happy endings?

I like both. It really just depends on my mood. I love being scared, but not when I’m all by myself. I love movies with twists. I get bored with predictability (probably because I’m so random and impulsive lol)

8. Special talents?

NSFW answer 😈😈😈

SFW answer 😇😇😇 I think I’m pretty good at coming up with ideas and designing the shirts and tumblers that I make. I like my things to be unique, so I can’t bring myself to buy premade designs on Etsy (even though it would cut the time of making things in half 🤦🏼‍♀️)

9. Where were you born?

In the hospital.

10. What are your hobbies?

COLORING 💓💓💓 Collecting stuffies, Designing and making shirts, tumblers, paddles, keychains, etc… Listening to music, Reading, Watching Disney movies and anything that has to do with GLITTER ✨

11. Have any pets?

I have the sweetest doggy in the whole wide world named Luna.

12. What sports do you play or have you played?

I was a cheerleader 😬

13. How tall are you?

I am 5’6”

14. Favorite subject in school?

My favorite subject in highschool was Bible (I went to a Christian school, not by choice. I begged my mom to let me go to public school and she refused 🙄🙄🙄) because I loved aggravating my Bible teacher by asking a million random questions that would distract him from his boring lectures. (ie… Is it a sin to have oral sex before I’m married? Is it a sin to take shrooms that we find growing naturally in the cow pasture? etc.) And if his answer was yes, I always asked for an explanation as to why. He would always divert from his planned lecture and answer my questions (the class was very appreciative lol)

15. Dream job?

I actually do what I love now… designing and making things. Although, it would be nice to get paid just to sit around and color with glitter pens all day lol. Due to getting pregnant as a teenager (Thanks mom for refusing to discuss sex other than to say NO sex until you are married 🙄🙄🙄) I could no longer go away to college like intended to become an attorney, so I stayed in the town I lived in and got my degree in Accounting. 10/10 do NOT recommend (It is super boring and due to ADHD I can’t sit at a desk and deal with numbers all day everyday and during tax season, everybody and their momma wants you to do their taxes for free and get them back thousands of dollars 😂🤣😂) Long story short, life is too short to be stuck in a job that makes you miserable, so I am super thankful to be doing what I love❣️

Tagging these lovely folks (No pressure if you don't want to participate) @missathesiren @pure-hell2 @drinkyourmilf @dominant-dominion @thebeardiswriting @anotherboredaustralian @mister-s0013 @c4c4ine @iecholouder @nerdy-boytoy @naughtybeardedguy

[bllsbailey]

Bill Barr Scoffs at Suggestions Trump Wants to Kill His Enemies, Says Press Takes Him 'Too Literally'

Bill Barr, who served as attorney general under Donald Trump, laughed off suggestions from the biased media that the former president actually wants to have his political enemies murdered in cold blood. 

Although Barr and Trump's relationship soured after the former AG refused to back some of the 45th president's arguments that the 2020 election was stolen from him, Barr surprised some when he endorsed Trump in the '24 race.

See:

Trump Responds to Bill Barr's Endorsement As Only He Can in Humorous Fashion

Barr continued to defend the former president Thursday when he appeared on CNN's "The Source" with host Kaitlan Collins and said that the biased press takes Trump "too literally" when he uses obviously sarcastic rhetoric and that they often try to drum up controversy when there is none there. Actually, that last part about drumming up controversy is my take, but it's the natural conclusion from Barr's remarks. 

"Journalists" took the completely normal use of the word "bloodbath" and turned it into a national outcry, yet were dead silent when crazed Democrats accused Biden's chief political rival of wanting to execute people.

Compare and Contrast:

Media Fail Compilation: 'Bloodbath' Headlines in Lockstep With DNC Talking Points

Unhinged Hillary Clinton Accuses Trump of Wanting to Be Like Putin and Murder His Enemies

In his conversation with Collins, Barr said Trump was prone to saying outlandish things, but in the end, he simply doesn't "think the threat is there."

Watch (and yes, I know that the CNN chyron unsurprisingly obsesses over other matters):

🚨 Barr inadvertently reveals that Trump called for executions on multiple occasions during his presidency. Barr mentioned that he didn't take these calls seriously, as Trump could be talked out of it befores any executions were “carried out”. pic.twitter.com/7DOe5uOmk1— The Intellectualist (@highbrow_nobrow) April 27, 2024

Here's how it went down, much to the chagrin of the CNN anchor who obviously wanted different answers:

COLLINS: …Alyssa Farah Griffin, who was Trump’s communications director [and who’s now on The View, which tells you all you need to know about her], posted yesterday [Thursday] and said that you were present at a moment when Trump suggested executing the person who leaked information that he went to the White House bunker when those George Floyd protests were happening outside the White House. Do you remember that?  BARR: I remember him being very mad about that. I actually don't remember him saying “executing,” but you know, I wouldn't dispute it… I mean, the president would lose his temper and say things like that. I doubt he would have [laughs] actually carried it out.  COLLINS [aghast]: But… he would say that on other occasions?

You can almost feel Collins' discomfort and annoyance; one can imagine her thinking, "C'mon man! Give me the answer that I want so I can make a viral tweet! Say he wants to kill people, SAY IT!" 

But he wasn't buying what she was selling:

BARR: The president, you know, the president had a… I think people sometimes took him too literally and, you know, he would say things like similar to that on occasion to blow off steam. But I wouldn't take him literally every time he did it.  COLLINS: Why not?  BARR: Because at the end of the day, it wouldn't be carried out and you could talk sense into him.  COLLINS [incredulous]: But just because it's not carried out and you could talk sense into him, doesn’t that still mean that the threat is there? 

Collins should probably have given up there and then, but I guess she thought she was smart enough to trip him up. She was wrong:

BARR: No. I mean, I think—I don't think the threat is there. The thing that I worry about President Trump is not that he's going to become an autocrat and do those kinds of things.  COLLINS: Why not?  BARR: Because I don't think he would, at the end of the day.  COLLINS [clearly getting annoyed that he’s refusing to play her game]: What's the basis for that, that, that understanding that you have? Is it just your own hunch?  BARR: That's my feeling, having worked for him and seen him in action.  I don't think he would actually go and kill political rivals and things like that. 

Barr can be somewhat of a conundrum; he's said things both roundly critical of Trump yet, as noted, recently endorsed him for the presidency anyway. In this interview, however, he's 100 percent correct that Trump's political opponents revel in trying to turn almost anything the former president says into some over-hyped controversy. What makes it more aggravating is that Biden routinely "jokes" about wanting to punch Trump—which would be an obvious act of political violence—yet the press just ignores it. 

Eat crow, Kaitlan Collins, and look for another story because this dog isn't hunting.

Watch the full interview here.

Yes, Biden did:

Ball of Confusion: Joe Biden Bizarrely Threatens Trump Punch in Rambling Mess of a NABTU Speech

[joontier]

Subliminal in Scrubs | V1;  report viii

pairings: dr. jeon jungkook x female reader

chapter rating: NC-17 | genre: humor, romance

warnings: someone will be leaving...temporarily....

word count: 2.3k

g/n: sorry for posting this late sdfasdfa

[taglist]: @nottodayjjk @ditttiii @zeharilisharaban @btsbunny07 @turquoiseandplaidinautumn @aamxxrii @codeinebelle​

Subliminal in Scrubs (the records) |  navi. | m.list

There’s a knock on your door, one you instantly recognize as it’s a catchy beat you exclusively share with one person alone: Ayoung. “Mind if I came over?” she asks from the other side of the door. You roll your eyes, chuckling as you walk to your doorway, “I don’t even know why you even bother asking, honestly!” 

“Unlawful entry happens when a private person enters the property of another without consent from the owner. The same shall be punished by…” 

Ayoung pauses her sentence midway as you open the door. “And does that count when said owner had long given such private person the passcode to her door, Attorney Shin Ayoung?” 

It’s Ayoung who fondly rolls her eyes this time. She raises her hands, fingers turning white as she clutches onto two bags full of food. Your face lights up at the sight.  Whoever said that the way to a man’s heart was through his stomach was severely mistaken - that, or he or she hadn’t taken a woman’s true source of wellbeing into consideration.

“What’s on our menu today?” 

“Oh you know our go-to review food. Seori halmeoni’s jjajjangmyeon house special!” Your mouth falls agape, astounded at how she even managed to get those when halmeoni’s special dish always sold out in the middle of the day. 

“Please don’t tell you lined up for hours for these...” 

“What if I told you I didn’t have to?” Ayoung winks while she takes her shoes off.  You grab the food from her hands and start setting the table. “What do you mean you didn’t have to?” She chuckles at your creased forehead, knowing you’re talking about the minimum one-hour waiting time of halmeoni’s stall - and that’s on off-peak hours.

“I think the landlady might’ve mentioned me moving to a new apartment, so when I was coming home from school today, she called me over to her stall and handed me these care packages.” 

“Awh, that’s so sweet of her!” Your chest warms at the thought and the reminder that your lovely neighbor was going to move away. Not to mention Chohee has similar plans too. 

Ayoung lets Netflix pick out a random movie, adjusting the lighting of your room enough for you to eat your dinner while watching. “Right, speaking of, won’t the hospitals be sending out acceptances for your post-graduate internship?” 

Pushing your laptop to Ayoung’s side of the table, you show her the screen of your mail - the same page you have been refreshing for hours now. “Well, let’s just hope for the best then, shall we?” 

Forty-five minutes into Miss Congeniality, a notification from your mail app lights up your phone screen. You see the header display that it’s from Woocheon, and it’s as if your heart drops to the ground, and your fingers are simply glued to the side of your phone, leaving you staring at it until the screen turns black again. 

Ayoung notices your silence and pauses the movie. “You okay?” the sweet girl places a comforting hand on your shoulder, shaking you gently to wake you from your trance. Gulping, you look at her expectantly. “It’s an email from Woocheon.” Her eyes widen along with yours. “Well, aren’t you going to open it?” 

“What if I didn’t make it?” 

“Unnie, you wouldn’t know unless you do.” 

With one eye closed, you turn to your laptop and click on the new mail. “Besides, they’d be a fool if they didn't accept the application of the same woman who topped the exam now, wouldn’t they?”

Just then, Chohee’s caller ID lights up your phone. 

“_____________!!!!!!!!!” Your best friend’s voice rings in your ears, your barely comprehensible name loud and clear with Chohee’s shrieking.

“I’m already positive you got accepted to Woocheon because I had this gut feeling and you know my gut never lied to me - plus I had it confirmed by a fortune teller…” Chohee starts, then takes a breather, “BUT guess what? I also made it to Daegu Medical Center!! GAH _________ I’m literally crying right now!!” 

“I’m so proud of you Chee, I really am,” your voice wavers, and you bite on your lip to keep yourself from pouring out all your feelings. “Don’t go me emotional right now, young woman! I’ve got makeup on, and my parents and I are going out to dinner, and I can’t ruin my cute outfit with tear-stained cheeks now, can I?” 

Typical Chohee. You smile. “Of course, Chee. I know. We’re gonna be actual doctors! You go ahead and enjoy your family time. Young-ie has come over with jjajjangmyeon.” 

“It’s jjajjang-night and none of you even bothered to send me an invite?! So much for our so-called friendship huh!” 

“Well, if you’re willing to drive three hours all the way from Daegu after you have dinner with your parents, you’re free to come. Otherwise, we’ll have to finish halmeoni’s recipe all by ourselves.” 

Chohee sighs from the other end of the line, while Ayoung watches your conversation with your best friend with the fondest of smiles. Chohee doesn’t stay long after that, declaring that she has to go. As soon as you put down your phone, Ayoung asks about your best friend, “If you don’t mind me asking, why did she choose Daegu Medical Center? I thought Woocheon was like the most sought after hospital for internships?” 

“Actually, DMC is being managed by Woocheon too. If I’m not mistaken, it’s also equally as hard to enter Woocheon. Plus her parents work there too, so DMC was the only hospital for her.” Ayoung nods her head in acknowledgment, then presses a button on the remote to continue the movie when an unknown number sends you a text.

Out of all people, you weren’t expecting Soomin to send you a text. You’d been meaning to hear from her so you excitedly send her a text back. 

Just the same as the last time you went here with Chohee, the tiny bell dings when you open the door to the cafe. Soomin instantly hears the sound and waves you over to her table. As you near, she rises from her seat with a big smile on her face. 

“________! Long time no see!” she exclaims, extending a hand outward to offer you the seat across hers. 

“Soomin! It’s been some time, hasn’t it? Would you believe it’s been months since we were reviewing our notes under strobe lights and loud music? Out of all the places to review though!” you laugh, setting your bag down. While Soomin goes through the menu, you take the opportunity to look for Jimin if he was around so you could introduce them to each other too. After all, there’s no harm casually meeting your workmates before meeting them formally as coworkers right? 

“You know, I was really looking forward to this day - especially when you had invited me to this lovely place for brunch…” A smile graces Soomin’s youthful features. “I actually know someone who world here...I’m not exactly sure if he’s working today though…” Once more, you glance over Soomin’s shoulders, hoping you’ll catch a glimpse of Jimin’s golden locks. Ah, yes. Speaking of goldilocks. 

“Wow! Just in time.... He’s actually here today! Jimin!” Your calling his name surprises him, immediately causing him to look for the source of the voice. He’s sporting a wide grin when he recognizes you from the counter, until he sees who you’re with then diverts his attention somewhere and walks away quickly. 

Absolutely taken aback by his reaction, you sit there for a moment with your mouth agape until Soomin clears her throat discreetly. “Um...o-okaayy, that was awfully strange...I’m sorry - he’s not usually like that.” You discreetly hide the disappointment in your voice, wondering if Jimin just literally pretended to not see you when you had even waved him over. 

“Oh really?” 

“Yeah...um...I’ll try to approach him later…” 

“Perhaps he’s uncomfortable meeting strangers?” 

Highly unlikely. Not when Jimin had no problem interacting with the other oath takers that he managed to get the whole group and your families away from the maze they called the convention center. Plus, he’s really good with the customers too who generously fill up the tip box after experiencing Jimin’s exemplary customer service. Jimin’s ability to handle social interactions is out of the question. 

“This Jimin guy,” Soomin starts, pointing a thumb towards the till, “how did you get to know him?” 

You pause for a moment, recalling your memories. “Honestly, I just realized it now, but I actually met him the same night I met you. He was in the same club we were dragged into, and when you convinced me to approach the cute guy at the bar, he actually saved me from a spiked drink - from the dude I was supposed to hit on. The next time I met Jimin was when Chohee and I went here for brunch too and we saw him working here, so I guess that’s how we all came to be friends…” Jimin’s cold-shoulder just moments ago appears in your thoughts. “....I guess...at least that’s what I thought.” 

You figure this apparent ‘friendship’ with Jimin wasn’t exactly as real as you thought it was.

It’s all the more surprising that Soomin seems to be the least interested in your meeting, or, that she already knew who Jimin was. She was simply nodding her head as you talked, occasionally sneaking a few glances at Jimin while he was serving orders to the other customers. 

You start patching things up, trying to put two and two together to see if it would all make sense. No way. Could it be? That these two had history? 

Just then, Soomin stands to excuse herself and heads over to the toilet. The moment she disappears from your sight, you hastily call Jimin over. “Are you okay? Was there a reason why you couldn’t come over earlier? I wanted to introduce two of my friends to each other, but one doesn’t seem to be so willing....” You cross your arms over your chest, murmuring your hurt feelings loud enough for Jimin to hear. 

“I’m sorry, ________. But your ‘friend’....she’s not really just someone uh…” 

“Was she your ex-girlfriend then?” Pursing your lips, you egg him to go on with a raise of your eyebrow. Jimin’s eyes widen and he shakes his head back and forth. “No! No...it’s not like that...she’s actually my boss.” 

His hesitant explanation doesn’t convince you one bit. Surely, there’s all the more reason for him not to blatantly ignore you when his boss was seated right in front of you the whole time, wasn’t it? 

Jimin sighs as he watches your reaction, knowing his clarification didn’t suffice. “Well she isn’t my boss, per se, but she is the daughter of the woman who owns this cafe. Wait, they own the whole building, really.” 

Oh. 

“And uh…” Jimin gulps. Hard. “....the other day…” He looks around warily. “...I might have spilled coffee all over her dress...which was white…” 

Oh. 

Shit. 

“Why didn’t you just quit? It would have been easier.” 

“I couldn’t. Not when Woocheon’s results weren’t out yet. I need my allowances too!” 

Just as if on a terrible cue, out of nowhere, Soomin appears beside Jimin. You weren’t about to abort from your original mission though. “Hah! Perfect timing! Um, Soomin, this is Jim…” Before you even finish your sentence, Jimin bows quickly, apologizes, then turns on his heel, declaring that he still had to get back to the kitchen to do stuff. 

Soomin remains silent, getting back to her seat quietly. You suddenly feel bad for her, seeing how Jimin makes every attempt to ignore her, and gets away with it every time. 

Unfortunately and unlike Chohee, you are unable to get out of an awkward situation in a snap of a finger, so you apologize in Jimin’s stead first. “I’m so sorry, uh, he can be really shy at first…” Hopefully that wasn’t a complete lie?

Much to your surprise, Soomin waves it off with a smile. “It’s no worry, really. He’s probably still bothered with him spilling coffee all over my dress but I assured him a couple of times that it wasn’t that big of a deal. And that I always have extra clothes stashed in my car.” 

Soomin shrugs as she takes a sip of her lemonade. “I told Jimin it was nothing afterwards, but he wouldn’t stop apologizing...and now he won’t look at me too.” You’re at a total loss, amazed at how she calmly and easily handled that situation like a true boss. 

“Besides, dwelling on such a small thing won’t be worth it. Not when we’ll be spending an entire year together…” 

You go over her statement again, partly confused. An entire year together? She meant the internship, probably? And above all that - she knew about Jimin too, even when the boy won’t even let himself get five meters close to Soomin?” 

“Ah yes, I’m sure Jimin has told you about Woocheon as well right?” 

Well, you were aware of that, but you weren’t so sure about how she knew about yours and Jimin’s applications. “Yeah...um, but….I’m sorry, was there a list online that mentioned all the chosen applicants for the internship program?” 

“Oh right - I sort of know some people from Woocheon who have told me about those who got accepted...It still feels like it was just yesterday when I was registering my classes for med school and now we're finally here!” 

The two of you toast the future, clinking your glasses of lemonade together. Nothing could get better than having your friends become your workmates too. Surely, it’s a sad fact that Chohee won’t be going to the same hospital as you would, but you’re beyond elated that she got into DMC where she’d always wanted to work at. 

At least you’ve got Jimin and Soomin by your side now, and hopefully, new friends you’ll meet along the way.

© joontier 2021

[queenlua]

Ace Attorney case tier list

so, in the past year, i finished replaying games 1 through 5 for the first time in forever, and also played game 6 for the first time ever

so here’s where i ruthlessly rank each of the cases based on that most scientific metric of all, My Opinions:

OPENING CASES

S-tier: Turnabout Trump (4-1).  I already knew this case, and I still gasped with surprise when Phoenix showed up, and when Kristoph showed his true colors, and when Apollo realized OH SHIT OH FUCK I REALLY AM ACCUSING MY BOSS OF MURDER HUH... what a wonderful, splashy, shockingly concise case to open up the post-O.G. trilogy world.  Marvelous.

A-tier: Turnabout Memories (3-1).  Seeing Mia Fey (finally!) in action is a long-awaited delight; seeing Phoenix being a total dumbass was an unexpected-yet-perfect and fitting delight.

B-tier: The First Turnabout (1-1).  Solid lil’ case with some conventional-but-well-executed humor.  I’ve got a soft spot for Larry Butz.

C-tier: The Lost Turnabout (2-1), The Foreign Turnabout (6-1).  The former’s fine but a little forgettable; the latter has some fun gags (Payne’s ridiculous new outfit, dude absolutely shredding on the mandolin, etc) but is marred by how uh... kinda silly the game’s core conceit is, lol

E-tier: Turnabout Countdown (5-1).  The context surrounding this introduction is just sloppy (badly handled in media res + let’s lowkey retcon game 4 isn’t a great setup), and also the case itself is just. irksome. ted tonate is just fundamentally irritating to look at

FINALE CASES

S-tier: Bridge to the Turnabout (3-5), Turnabout Goodbyes (1-4).  No explanation needed.  God they fuck so hard

A-tier: The Cosmic Turnabout + Turnabout for Tomorrow (5-4 + 5-5), Turnabout Succession (4-4).

The former two cases are what makes AA5 worth it, and they make for a tremendously fun ride.  It fumbles the execution in some notable ways (Apollo’s sudden j’accuse moment feels a little forced/awkward/inadequately foreshadowed, and damn it sure would’ve been nice to know Clay Terran at all before he died, and also The Phantom’s final meltdown could’ve used a bit more emotional heft)... but okay let’s be real, I’m here for Simon Blackquill, and this case gives me so much of him so who gives a shit.  (And Aura!  Condescending obnoxious engineering queen!  I love her!)  

As for Turnabout Succession... while I earnestly wish the game had explored more of Klavier’s feelings about this whole setup, and some more emotional beats for Apollo, the case still makes for such a satisfyingly twisty and fun investigation overall (the poison stamp! what a ridiculous murder method! I love it!) that it’s a more-than-worthy finale.

B-tier: Turnabout Revolution (6-5), Farewell, My Turnabout (2-4).

The former does some cool stuff—I particularly like the opening half, where Apollo’s being real snippy and coping with Frankly Bizarre Dad Feelings, and giving Apollo a chance to finally throw down against Phoenix is a blast.  The latter half of the case starts feeling a little... ridiculous? cramped? idk? like, they didn’t do nearly enough foreshadowing about Nahyuta’s whole deal for me to care about his drama, this justice system is so obviously silly and the manner in which the revolution is playing out strains my already-suspended-sky-high disbelief... fun, and flashy, but more noise than signal in the last part, I guess.

As for Farewell, My Turnabout: of course I love Edgeworth rolling back into court goin’ through SOME kind of bizarre emotional arc of Hey I’m Totally Healed Now and obnoxiously preaching about Truth TM.  And it’s cool that the game set up a case where you want to lose.  But the net result is a bit strange tonally—it’s trying set up some kind of message about It’s Not Just About Winning, It’s About Pursuing The Truth, but it feels really muddled when that’s combined with Okay But Maya’s Literally Being Held Hostage Like Right Now, Surely A Reasonable Justice System Has A Process For Dealing With This Obviously Complicated Situation, Right?

but also Franziska takes a fucking bullet (how did I forget about that) and then gets to roll in like Ms. Save The Day so, really, lots of good shit here

FILLER CASES

S-tier: Reunion, and Turnabout (2-2), Turnabout Beginnings (3-4).  Look, the first one gives me all the Fey family drama a girl could ask for, and the latter gives me young Edgeworth being a total shit in an obnoxiously shimmery outfit.  The whole enchilada is here

A+ tier: The Magical Turnabout (6-2).  DELIGHTFUL!  MAGICIAN!  SHENANIGANS!  Like you get to guess the trick behind a magic act as part of the case, how fucking fun is that, and also the Apollo & Athena duo’s chemistry is perfect, the villain is a FANTASTIC bastard, and even the bit characters you meet during the investigation are total delights... Probably the best “standalone” case in the series, in that it doesn’t rely on any emotional connections to previous cases (unlike 2-2 and 3-4) to still totally and completely rule.

A tier: Turnabout Samurai (1-3), Turnabout Reclaimed (5-DLC).

For Turnabout Samurai, I remembered before this replay how delightful the TV SHOW STUDIO investigation and actor-fandom stuff was; I had TOTALLY forgotten Vasquez calling in her mob connections to try and wreck you.  What a fantastic villain; what a fun case.

Turnabout Reclaimed is just good solid goofy nonsense.  Probably receives a boost for me in particular because, yeah, Simon Blackquill.  But then again who isn’t giving cases a boost on that account; they are MISSING OUT

B tier: The Stolen Turnabout (3-2).  Ron and Desirée are so great sighs into hands

C tier: Listing roughly in order of preference: Turnabout Academy (5-3), Turnabout Serenade (4-3), Turnabout Sisters (1-2), Recipe for a Turnabout (3-3), Rite of the Turnabout (6-3), Rise from the Ashes (1-5).

Four of these (5-3, 4-3, 1-2, 3-3) are perfectly solid cases; I just don’t love them quite as much as “thievery hijinks” or “Hollywood hijinks” or other such particularly delightful flavors.  Everyone has a favorite flavor of Jolly Rancher and all that.

Rite of the Turnabout is interesting and connected with the larger themes of the game in a cool way, and makes good use of the divination mechanic.  However, the last bit gets twisty enough to actually be kind of confusing, and said larger themes of the game are... kinda hard for me to take seriously... which, yeah, leads to it feeling a little stilted when it really should be singing.

Rise from the Ashes landed awkwardly for me.  I know it was added well after the first game’s release, and it does a good job of continuing some of the cool stuff from that game—it’s neat, in isolation, to see Phoenix and Edgeworth working together (while still sniping at each other!), and some of the DS-specific mechanics are neat.  However, I just didn’t feel like I learned quite enough about Ema and Lana to care about them like I should, and retconning “(almost certainly true) rumors that Edgeworth was involved in Shady Shit TM” into “actually Edgeworth was totally ignorant of Shady Shit TM, like at worst his crime was willful ignorance / incuriosity, he was just been manipulated by the Police Chief”... makes Edgeworth less interesting to me!  Like, it’s cool to see Edgeworth caught off-guard and under pressure, but I wish the circumstances had been different?  Also Gant’s theme song is annoying as shit, which is petty but hey this is my blog post so

D tier: Turnabout Storyteller (6-4), Turnabout Corner (4-2), Turnabout Big Top (2-3), The Monstrous Turnabout (5-2).

Turnabout Storyteller has some fun gags with My Dude Simon and also Taka, but was heavily marred by Everyone Talking Down To Athena The Entire Fucking Case Oh My God Can You All Just Shut Up.

Turnabout Corner has... lots of fun elements but... look the fucking stolen-panties setup just grates ok

I don’t think I hate Turnabout Big Top the way most people seem to, but I did find the final murder setup more annoying that I remembered this playthrough—bro you were really sure the dude was going to conveniently stand right there and the heavy statue was definitely going to strike a killing blow and not just give the guy a concussion?  ok lol

The Monstrous Turnabout suffers mostly from poor puzzle/investigation design, being too hand-hold-y, and also having a core gimmick/setting that just wasn’t really my thing.  Alas!

[barbasbodaciousbeard]

Delete the Twitter app, Mr. Barba

In which Rafael Barba deletes the Twitter app because of the Householder case, and Carmen babysits him. 

Accidental Feminist Icon

The last thing on Rafael Barba’s mind when he was in the hospital room with Maggie Householder was his online reputation. Once he’d turned himself in and been released on his own recognizance, however, he opened his phone to call mami and instead saw hundreds of Twitter notifications, emails from people whose names he didn’t recognize, and missed calls and voicemails from unfamiliar numbers. He didn’t touch Twitter, texting Carmen to ask how bad it was and she advised him to delete the application until at least after the trial. When he went home, mami was there and just as disappointed as he expected. There were tears the minute she saw him, but not any offered comfort. 

“You murdered a child, mijo.”

“You don’t understand, mami. No lo viste. El no estaba realmente vivo.”

“Esa fue la decisión de Dios. No es tu decisión. Tu abuela estaría tan decepcionada de ti.”

“No estoy de acuerdo. Si estás aquí para regañarme, vete a casa.”

“Te llevo a la confesión.”

“Vete a casa, mami. Me confesaré cuando esté lista.”

“Rafa-”

“Go home.”

Lucia stormed out, and Rafael went inside his apartment and went straight for the scotch he kept aside. It wasn’t his good scotch. It was the cheap one that burned his throat and left him sicker than he ever was the next day. Before twisting off the cap, he heeded Carmen’s advice, deleting the Twitter app as he dropped to the couch and began to drink. It was only eleven, not even noon, but he didn’t want to remember what had transpired the day before. He should wade through his email, but someone had posted it. He knew because it was referenced time and time again that they’d found his personal email via some Twitter thread or Subreddit or something else he hadn’t yet encountered. He’d had to mute his phone as phone calls rolled in; the only one he answered confirmed it was strangers from the Internet who had seen the news. Carmen called it getting cancelled when it happened to other people. That usually didn’t involve the loss of a life, so the term seemed not quite right for what was happening, especially given the fact this included more than just the people he was used to. People who had never encountered him were hearing about him in the news. 

He ignored Olivia’s calls, considering the morning’s interactions enough. As he drank, Rafael was able to filter unknown numbers and messages, tossing the phone aside and quickly finishing the bottle. Olivia came by, and he didn’t answer, choosing to lay back on the couch as the room spun around him. Carmen texted him, and he didn’t look. An hour later, he heard her outside of his door with Olivia and unlocking he apartment for her. He’d given her a key long ago so she could get files or suits or drop off leftovers. Both of them came in, and it suddenly dawned on him that he had his suspenders down and shirt open over his undershirt. He’d spilled the most recent tumbler over himself with the pizza he’d ordered. And now, they could see him like this, eyes rimmed red and mood unstable as he thought more than he could about himself. 

“Mr. Barba,” Carmen said softly, kneeling by him. Olivia stayed closer to the door, surveying the room. By the nature of their constant proximity, Carmen had seen the tail end or starts of Rafael getting frustrated, though he always pressed it down with a glass of scotch and good meal. That said, she’d found him too drunk after a trial didn’t go his way. Seen him frustrated as he went through a case he may not be able to do anything about it. Caught him yelling at paperwork as though something would happen. She’d also seen him the next mornings when he came in pretending not to be insanely hungover and was wearing the suit from his office.

“I’m fine.”

“No you aren’t. Is this what happens between an eight o’clock bourbon and the office suit?”

“Shut up, Carmen.”

“Don’t talk to me like that. I’m helping you.”

“Sorry,” he said with a huff as his hand ran down his face, and Olivia had to stifle a laugh at how properly embarrassed he looked. “My email and phone are bad. How bad is Twitter?”

“Medium. A lot of people understand. Or they feel that they can’t understand, so they’ll watch the story.”

“People understand murder?” he scoffed.

“No. No one does. But we all understand how impossible your choice was. How badly the parents were hurting.”

“I was too selfish to do it for my dad.”

“I know, Mr. Barba. But people want to know how long until they hear more. Want people to wait. Can see why you did it. It’ll blow over. We can change your number and your email. Twitter has a really handy button. Block.”

“My name’s Rafael.”

“You’re my boss.”

“Not for long,” he chuckled bitterly before his gaze softened. “All I wanted was for people not to hurt.”

“You need to go to bed, Rafa.” It was Olivia now, and his eyes suddenly snapped open. It was different when it was Olivia. They were friends, but they kept things to work. Other than the occasional group event, they’d grab dinner after work. She didn’t hear him debate pocket squares or see him drunk alone in his office or help him think of replies on Twitter. He’d probably lose his friendship with Carmen once he wasn’t in the office, he supposed. She humored her boss a lot more than she probably should.

“I’m fine, Liv.” It came with more of a snort than he liked, and he was suddenly pulling himself up to sit, wrapping his shirt around himself as though it were a cardigan. Carmen watched he was steady, and Olivia was sure she now knew what she’d looked like when Noah was learning to walk on his own with her hand on his back to keep him upright. Once things passed, she wanted to ask if Rafael was always this willing to be relaxed around Carmen, but she wasn’t sure she really wanted to know.

“I don’t think I’m helping things,” Olivia said softly, and Carmen gave a gentle nod.

“My son’s with my mom for a visit. I’ll take care of him.”

“You’re sure? I can call Lucia.”

“I’m fine, lieutenant. And mami has already been here.”

“Make sure he meets with an attorney tomorrow.”

“I make his calendar. I know.”

“You two can stop talking about me like I’m not here,” he grumbled, heels pressed against his eyes. “I’m drunk, not deaf.”

“You’re belligerent, counsellor.”

“Call me Rafael,” he said again, flopping onto the couch when Olivia had left again.

“I thought Lieutenant Benson was your best friend, Rafael.”

“She is, I guess. Is that sad? My best friend used to be Alex, but I pursued that case. As if mami needed more reason to hate me.” 

“You don’t act like you in front of her. Not all the way.”

“This isn’t me.”

“It’s you without a carefully constructed persona.”

“If that’s the case, I suppose you’re my best friend, Miss Frye.” She’d expected to see a bemused smirk or annoyed scowl, but Carmen was taken aback by how sincere he looked as his hand moved to rest on her forearm and squeeze as well as he could.

“My name’s Carmen,” she teased. “Now come on. You need to go to bed.”

“My suit will get wrinkled.”

“I’ll hang it for you.”

“You can sleep in the guest room. It’s not safe for you to go-” His eyes were suddenly wide. “Carmen, where’s Ollie?”

“With my mom. I told her you needed me for a couple days.”

“You don’t need to disrupt your life.”

“I’ll tell you a secret Mist- Rafael.”

“What?” he asked, flopping into bed where she’d pulled the blanket down once he managed to strip to his boxers.

“You’re my best friend too.” She tugged the blanket over him, pressing a gentle kiss to his temple. He smiled up at her, and she made her way out turning off the lights. It seemed silly to say it to someone like him, but they’d worked together a long time, had a lot of late night talks. She liked him more than a lot of people she knew, and saw him more than anyone outside of her family. 

Carefully, she cleaned his living room, dumping his other bottle of cheap scotch out and disposing of both before setting up the coffee to brew at seven, just in time to have him at an attorney’s office by nine. McCoy had approved her to work from wherever she needed to in order to keep Rafael functioning. She’d have been miserable helping Peter Stone with this trial anyway. They both knew about his father, and it seemed he may be a ticking time bomb. She logged into his twitter, going on a blocking spree as she explored his mentions, tweeting from her own account and his that she’d done it and retweeting it from his account. 

She also liked all the kind ones. The ones asking for understanding or expressing empathy. The ones that acknowledged he had an impossible choice and neither one would have sat well with their own conscious. Leave a child and his family to suffer without end or expedite the inevitable. Then there were his direct messages. Since getting verified, he had the ability to only see messages from people he followed. As she combed through, there were a couple of hateful messages she ignored, but most who knew him expressed understanding and a couple even included leads if he wanted out of the city. She marked those down in her notes app before falling asleep in the guest bedroom. 

The sound that greeted her in the morning was Rafael Barba vomiting as the coffee machine roared to life in the background. Silently, she ordered ginger tea and vitamin b12 for delivery, going to fetch the pedialyte she’d brought from home. When he came out, hair wet from a shower, she’d already brewed him tea, cooked breakfast, and given him an expectant look as she slid a glass of unnaturally purple electrolytes to him. He didn’t know what to say, so he took the proffered glas and took a long sip before wincing.

“Grape,” she said plainly.

“Grapes don’t taste like that.”

“Ollie likes it okay. I make him popsicles though.”

“He’s old enough for popsicles? Isn’t he still on milk?”

“Rafael, he’s two. He drinks milk, but he even eats.”

“Does he like books yet?”

“He does. He really likes being read to.”

“I’ll read to him next time I see him.” He was quiet for a moment, and when he spoke again, his voice was thick. “Do you play him music?”

“Some. Usually my playlists.”

“Play him Bach.”

“You’ll have to tell me what’s best to play him.”

“I’ll send you a playlist.” 

“Why Bach?” She watched as his jaw shifted from side to side, lips pressed together, and that told her all she needed to know. “Drew liked Bach?”

“He’d never know if he liked Bach. Maggie was playing one of his cantatas.”

“Maybe we can take him to an orchestra one day.”

“There are some shows. Kid friendly.”

“He’d like that.”

“I’ll send it to you.”

“You’ll come, won’t you?”

“Me?”

“It’s your idea.”

“You’d still let me around your son?”

“My son is a healthy vibrant boy. If he was in the same situation as Drew, it would be hard, but I’d still want you there. You did exactly what I would have done for him, okay?”

“Did you mean what you said last night?”

“Which part?”

“The last part.”

“You probably are my best friend. And that hasn’t changed. I wish you didn’t have to be put in the situation, but I would hope I’d have been strong enough to do the same. And other people agree with me.”

“God, you’re not actually looking at Twitter.”

“I looked at Twitter. I blocked anyone vitriolic. But, I collected all the kind ones in your favorites for when you’re ready. A lot of your attorney friends have job leads for you if you leave the DA’s office.”

“I’m leaving. And I’m probably going to fucking prison. You’ll be down a friend in a few months.”

“Stop it.”

“They’ll end me in there, Carmen. I sent some of them there.” She wasn’t sure what to make at how at peace with the prospect he was.

“And you won’t go to prison. Don’t focus on that. Even if you do, they’ll have to do something to protect you. And I’ll come visit you.”

“You barely know me.”

“We spend more time together than I do with anyone else. I know you’re good, you have a good heart, you send birthday presents to every SVU detective’s kid and think I don’t know you send them coffee gift cards on their birthdays. You’re a total mama’s boy and despite what a snarky prick you are, you have imposter syndrome out the ass. You’re lapsed enough Catholic not to go to church, but you pray when things are really bad. I also know some part of your brain feels like you’ve let down people who think you do good work by this one thing, but one bad doesn’t outweigh an exorbitant amount of good. I hope Ollie has half of the ethical backbone you do. I know there have been occasions in the past you weren’t perfect, but the man I’ve known deserves every ounce of credit he gets. That doesn’t mean you’ve never made a mistake.”

“You’re ridiculous,” he muttered, and much to his chagrin, Carmen wrapped him in a hug that he returned, refusing to look at her. He was suddenly aware he’d cry if he looked at what he knew was a genuine smile. “I’ve got to get dressed to see an attorney.”

“Who are you going with?”

“Randy Dworkin.”

“He’ll be good.”

“I hate to admit that. And I’m sure I’ll hate every second with him.”

“How about you teach me about Bach this afternoon?”

“You have work.”

“McCoy approved me to be remote.”

“So you’re my sitter?” She could almost swear a smile pulled at the corner of his lip, and she felt pride she didn’t expect.

“I suppose. So Bach?”

“Bring Ollie?”

“Deal.”

[astrologista]

Gavin Bros. Analysis

here be spoilers for apollo justice (aa4)

There are already a bunch of posts all about AA:AJ and just what the heck was behind Kristoph Gavin’s Psychelocks. What were his motivations? Why did he do what he did? As fragmented as the story is surrounding the Gavin brothers, and as much as I wish the source material had rounded out their characters a little more, I believe the game actually tells you pretty much everything there is to know about this case rather succinctly. Don’t worry as I will use evidence to back up my claims...

It is notably interesting that Kristoph’s Psychelocks only come up when Phoenix asks him point blank why he killed Zak Gramarye. This is the one question that Kristoph consistently refuses to answer directly, both in Solitary Cell 13 and in his testimony at his trial. Coincidentally, this is also the main question that he ever gets asked that speaks to his emotions or state of mind. Kristoph has a really good logical answer for basically all of the evidence-based questions. But, it’s also not a coincidence that Apollo has the presence of mind to note - “why not bring up the motive from the start? unless it was a battle he thought he might lose...”

This establishes pretty clearly that Kristoph is going to have a vested interest in keeping all questioning solidly focused on the material evidence at hand such as the postage stamp, the nail polish, and reasons why he cannot be directly connected to those objects. The law provides plenty of escape hatches and loopholes for Kristoph to exploit, which he does, providing him with the legal basis to be able to escape punishment due to the inability for anyone to prove his guilt beyond a reasonable doubt. This is not surprising as being a very successful defense attorney is literally his job and he happens to be extremely competent at it.

This kind of person is scary if you meet them in real life because they can always seem to wriggle out of anything you try to pin on them. Kristoph is a grand master at doing this, quite possibly as good as they come in the AA universe.

Here’s the rub. Apollo brings up that Kristoph wants to avoid bringing the conversation into motives and state of mind questions, why? Because “it’s a battle he thinks he might lose”. Every single time this topic comes up, Kristoph deflects the question. This also is indicated by the five black Psychelocks that come up when Phoenix asks him point blank why he killed Zak. So from this we can gather that the game is drilling it in pretty well that Kristoph’s motivations are a sore spot for him and possibly the one chink in his armor.

Because the material evidence cannot prove anything for or against Kristoph’s guilt, in a typical case like this the police would hope for the holy grail - a full confession and admission of guilt. Kristoph is much too cool of a customer to fall into any traps, no doubt he was questioned very rigorously after being arrested, but all he even had to do was invoke his right to remain silent regarding his motives or simply claim that he killed Zak just ‘cause y’know, being evil is fun. Once he confessed to killing Zak, though, the police probably didn’t care all that much to probe into his thoughts and motivations really, if he did it, he did it and he’s going to spend a stint in jail either way.

Phoenix sees through this, however. In Solitary Cell 13 he does NOT allow Kristoph to drop or evade the question. That is why we get as far as even seeing the black Psychelocks at all. If we can’t know the motive, why bother to have this scene in the game?

Quite simply we can now understand that Kristoph’s motive for killing is something emotional. It is not something that he’s going to divulge casually, but it is also probably something that he is worried about divulging UNCONSCIOUSLY which is why he constantly tries to steer conversations away from it, instead deflecting to discuss the evidence or the emotional state of other people in the room. Consider that Kristoph’s reputation is PREDICATED on him being “the Coolest Defense in the West”. His identity is based on his successful suppression of emotions in court. This is not to say he shows no emotion or is some kind of monotone emotionless husk. He has a rather dry sense of humor. He banters with Apollo. He banters with Phoenix. He isn’t as uptight as some portrayals would have you believe (”life is to be taken easy”). When it comes to surface topics, Kristoph is an open book. He’s not as terse as you would believe, but rather kind of poetic and loquacious and conversational (to his downfall in 4-1). You get the feeling that he would be a very good conversationalist. But only for surface topics. Try to dig a little deeper and he will very neatly deflect your efforts. 

How can we hope to understand a character who by definition does not have any interest in talking about his innermost neuroses? The reason why people still discuss the Gavin brothers and Turnabout Succession so much is that, while a very satisfying and intense case, it is unlike a lot of other AA cases in that you come away from it with a LOT of open ended questions. You don’t feel the same feeling of closure as you would get from the DL-6 case, where it feels like you finally understand all the facts of the case and all of the character motivations come to light making you go “oh! THAT MAKES SENSE!” you understand why von karma killed gregory, and everything comes together nicely in the end. Turnabout Succession is kind of a rarity in that it does not do that. By the end, you feel like you clearly understand the case, but you do not have a crystal clear view of the root cause of the motivations behind it.

In Kristoph’s final testimony he does shed a little bit of light on his motivations for his crimes. The issue that he has is mainly centered around his dismissal by Zak Gramarye as his representation. And, his subsequent replacement with Phoenix Wright, an attorney he perceives to be low-class and sub-par. Kristoph then states “these men shamed me, and I could not forgive that.” This is as close to an answer as to why he went to such lengths to get Phoenix disbarred as we are likely to get. Disproportionate retribution is the name of the game. It seems as if, if there’s one thing Kristoph cannot tolerate, it’s being looked down upon by someone that he perceives as inferior to him. Kristoph has extremely polarized notions of who should get to practice law, who is acceptable and who is categorized under “ignorant swine soiling the courts”. He makes very, very clear that he has nothing but disdain for common people, common wisdom, and any use of emotion or feelings in deciding verdicts.

So the particular manner in which Phoenix sought to bring him down with the jury system was a very deliberate masterstroke to Kristoph’s pride. That much we can establish. But again, motive. The game goes out of its way to tell you that whomever defended Zak would be “famous beyond belief” and, presumably also, rich. They would get a lot of very high-profile clients and cases sent their way after successfully defending the uber-famous magician Zak Gramarye. 

Taking all of this into account, right. Is it possible that everything Kristoph did has its roots in one very simple source, the root of all evil?

Money.

Taking a step back for a moment, consider Klavier. Why does Klavier perform in a rock band? “Because I want Frauleins to look at me when I walk down the street.” I feel like people really want to believe that both Kristoph and Klavier are super deep characters and have all this deep lore and hidden backstory. Maybe they do. Most AA characters do. But consider this. What if they’re both so deep, they’re actually just shallow? Yes, that shallow?

Given how much AA:AJ focuses on the Gavins, which is really not that much, this concept seems difficult to swallow. Is there really more to the story based on what the game gives us? If there is, how would we piece it together?

One major hint the game gives you about Kristoph (and, if this is insignificant, then you have to really wonder why they bother to bring it up at all) takes place directly after seeing Kristoph’s black Psychelocks in Solitary Cell 13. He starts doing his nails. Phoenix says “I know appearances are a big thing with you”. Kristoph says “You know what I say? One cannot live a beautiful life without beautiful nails.”

I feel that this statement is important because it is probably about as deep of a look as we are ever going to get at how shallow Kristoph Gavin really is. He hopes you will believe that he’s playing 12-dimensional chess with some kind of fucked up backstory and motive going, but the truth is, he’s no chessmaster. Based on what the game gives you, there’s really only one motivation for everything that makes sense.

Kristoph killed Zak, Drew and attempted to kill Vera to cover his tracks. He had to do everything he could to make sure no one talked about the forgery. He had to stalk people like Spark and keep Phoenix very close (the epitome of keep your friends close keep your enemies closer). There’s nothing really debatable about those facts because they are all discussed in the game.

What about the root cause? Revenge, of course, for Phoenix stealing away the chance for Kristoph to defend Zak.

Why was defending Zak so important to Kristoph? To become rich and famous.

So wait. Why does Kristoph need to be rich and famous?

As it is, Kristoph appears to be very affluent and well off. There is no real reason directly given in the game as to why he would need such prestige and fame other than that it feeds his massive ego and superiority complex. So that’s a big part of it, no debate there.

But why would the excessive monetary gains that would be secured off of the Gramarye case be so appealing to Kristoph? We’ll re-examine this in a little bit.

In Daryan Crescend’s case, Phoenix tells Apollo “every man has an igniter. find his and set it off”. 

What is Kristoph’s igniter?

I mean some people would say Phoenix Wright is Kristoph’s igniter based on his breakdown. But, I think more of that trial was contrived by Phoenix than we tend to notice.

I think Klavier is Kristoph’s igniter.

The final trial in Turnabout Succession would not have been able to succeed without Lamiroir, without the jury system, without Phoenix pulling the strings, without Trucy, without Apollo, and most especially without Klavier. Removing any of these elements from the scenario would immediately give Kristoph a massive advantage in allowing him to manipulate the courtroom. Can you imagine Payne trying to prosecute Kristoph?

No. Klavier was the only one who could confront Kristoph successfully.

The final trial had to be contrived in such a way as to put maximal pressure on Kristoph to increase the chances that he would slip up or, more likely, that an element of randomness and/or emotion would become introduced. Phoenix sets up Klavier as the prosecutor for this trial for a good reason - remember, Phoenix tells Apollo point blank that he (Phoenix) is pulling all of the strings for the Misham trial, so whatever happens is entirely his responsibility.

It must have been difficult for Phoenix to entrust Klavier, the person who sealed his fate, with such an important task. But realistically, he didn’t really have a choice. Klavier’s disclosure of Kristoph’s visit to the prosecutor’s office is the glue that holds together the entire case against Kristoph Gavin. Notice that Kristoph never really does anything to keep Klavier out of the public eye or otherwise silence him (up until the very end at least). If I knew there was someone walking around giving press interviews and practicing as a prosecutor who knew something really incriminating about me, I would want them swept away or snuffed out asap - I mean, Kristoph has already poisoned Drew and Vera who were unlikely to tattle on him at best; Drew couldn’t even identify him! What Klavier has on him is much, much more damning dirt. Either Kristoph really loves and trusts his brother or is convinced that he can control Klavier to the point where Klavier would never dare tell anyone about that visit or wouldn’t want to. Probably both are true.

The interesting thing about this dynamic is that this is really the only time where we see both Gavin brothers together in one room, as well. Something about being in proximity changes both of their behaviors. Klavier becomes hyper-alert and nervous in Kristoph’s presence, a marked change from his usually easy demeanor. Klavier’s presence causes Kristoph to make several mistakes, which end up costing him the case.

So all of these things needed to happen, and they needed to happen simultaneously for Phoenix to succeed. Getting back to my theory on Kristoph, we can see from what’s said in the game a few things - he really, REALLY wanted to be the one to benefit from defending Zak Gramarye (a trial he knew he would win against his brother using forged evidence), the presence of Klavier is his undoing in court, and his appearances are very, very important to him. 

I honestly think the real reason Kristoph was so salty about losing out on the Gramarye trial fame and money is that he didn’t just want to be affluent or well-to-do. He wanted to be excessively, filthy rich.

If you look at Solitary Cell 13 you will see that Kristoph likes very much to surround himself with many nice things. He likes tasteful decorations and furniture. He enjoys literature, music, art, that weird rose he keeps in a vase, and he has a dog named Vongole. “First rate in all things, accept nothing less.”

To have such top of the line items, Kristoph must not only be rich, he must be like top 1% rich. He has to have the absolute best of everything. This is why he needs money. Without these things, what separates him from the ignorant swine he so despises? This is why Kristoph needed money.

Nowhere is this highlighted more than with the Ariadoney nail polish. I think it’s mentioned a couple of times that the Ariadoney is absolutely the best possible nail polish that you can buy. It’s very, very expensive and is manufactured in extremely limited quantities (this is discussed during Kristoph’s testimony). If Kristoph is this fixated on something as simple as a bottle of nail polish, you can almost imagine the absolutely ludicrous costs of every other item that he uses or owns, not limited to his home, his car, fine foods and wine, his expensive hobbies, possibly traveling etc etc etc etc. I just know this fool shops at Whole Foods, because I can’t see him buying groceries at the Costco. It makes a lot of sense as to why he is single as well. Kristoph Gavin would end up being an expensive habit to any partner who would have him - I wouldn’t want to share a bank account or credit line with him. He needs Gucci to keep him happy. No bootlegs here.

Point is, Kristoph Gavin has an addiction to the finer things in life and he will NOT settle for second rate products. He will have what he wants and he will do basically anything to maintain his lifestyle at its current elite level at the expense of his own morality and soul. Sadly enough I feel like that might be as deep as it gets with him. That’s a really pathetic motive to have and makes me hate him a lot more, but it’s so fucked up I can’t look away.

Consider also the most important thing to Kristoph of all - his appearance. It costs money to keep yourself up and this seems to be the one area that Kristoph might end up pouring the most money into. The top of the line suit, the white shoes, the perfect tan, the platinum blonde hair so immaculately coiffed, the fact that his skin is virtually perfect and the fact that his face is near-identical to Klavier’s despite being some 8 or 9 years older. Most normal people would have some kind of facial imperfection pop up at some point, a wrinkle, a pock mark, something. And that’s when you realize... that Kristoph Gavin has most likely had work done. Like, on his face to make it stay youthful. He’s just that vain and probably also despises watching Klavier stay young and pretty while he’s just aging. Fillers? Botox? Collagen treaments? Something more invasive? No one knows, but all I’m saying is that Klavier’s character description goes out of its way to describe Klavier as “the spitting image of Kristoph Gavin”. Vera notices the extreme resemblance right away. There can certainly be genetic basis for two brothers looking alike, but compare that to how Mia and Maya look “alike”, or Lana and Ema, both of whom have a similar age gap to Kristoph and Klavier. You would realize that Kristoph and Klavier seem to have somewhat of a more obvious resemblance despite the age difference. So this isn’t just possible anymore, this is actually likely. I don’t think the game implies that Kristoph has undergone plastic surgery or anything, so I’m keeping this in the realms of headcanon for now. But it would make perfect sense as yet another reason as to why Kristoph Gavin needs cold cash. He needs to look flawless and he needs access to the absolutely most top of the line treatments and practitioners, continually. And as he continues to age, he needs to get more and more aggressive, more and more products, more and more retouching with those age reversal creams and foundations and stabilizers. That adds up, cost-wise, very very fast, especially if you want top of the line EVERYTHING, and Kristoph does indeed. It is very clear that settling for any less would be completely unacceptable to him.

All of this money, it has to come from somewhere. Being a posh defense lawyer will bring in some money, sure, but nothing near what Kristoph is going to need to live his beautiful life. Winning the Gramarye trial would have probably bought him enough prestige, clients and monetary gains to support himself off of law for the rest of his life. It does make a lot of sense that he would be incensed after losing that chance.

There is one more unexplored possibility as to why Kristoph had to be the one to win the Gramarye trial, though, and it ties into the money issue as well. This was supposed to be a fair match, after all, brother to brother. Klavier’s first case, in fact. It was supposed to be Kristoph vs. Klavier, and Kristoph wanted to make sure that he would be the one to win. Only Zak and Phoenix ruined that chance - a once in a lifetime chance, actually, for Kristoph to go up against his brother on Klavier’s very first day.

Klavier was the prosecutor of the Gramarye trial. It was his very first case. What could Kristoph have to gain by being the one to trounce 17-year-old Klavier in court on his first day on the job?

Well, not much, other than it would have been a huge crushing blow to Klavier psychologically.

There’s a comic floating around by someone, I think zarla-s, where Kristoph wins the Gramarye trial and is discussing his win with Klavier afterwards. Kristoph is smug and hopes Klavier will be humbled by his impressive win, but Klavier is unperturbed by his loss, happy for his brother and insists he’ll win next time.

As cute as this is, somehow I don’t think that’s exactly how it would go down.

Klavier has actively shown how nervous / anxious / upset Kristoph’s mere presence makes him in a courtroom setting. Based on this, it’s not unfair to say that losing to Kristoph IN PARTICULAR on Klavier’s very first case would have been a devastating psychological blow that could technically end Klavier’s prosecutor career before it even began. There is a lot on the line with the Gramarye trial, don’t forget the praise and adulation that Klavier gained by winning it. So other than all of the fame, adulation, money and pride Kristoph would have gained by rigging and winning the Gramarye trial, there is another dimension that he was also robbed of - the ability to ruin his brother’s law career. Losing to another attorney like Phoenix or anyone else would not be enough to do the job. It would have to and could only be Kristoph’s doing.

What reason could Kristoph have for wanting Klavier’s law career to come to an end?

Well, Klavier does have another job. As a rock star.

Wildly popular rock stars make a lot of money, many many many times more than even a celebrity defense attorney could dream to make.

The Gavinners had multiple albums go platinum. They sold out shows all over the country, I believe, possibly all over the world. They are a brand. They are profitable. Klavier is profitable.

With how much Kristoph depends on and uses Klavier, it’s not out of the realm of possibility that Kristoph gets to take a big cut of Klavier’s earnings from his music career. For all we know, Kristoph could have been responsible for assembling and filing many of the Gavinners’ early contracts and legal paperwork. The rights to songs, record deals, merchandising - this is a lot of stuff. I’d say it’d be pretty hard to believe that Kristoph did not have his hooks into the Gavinners from day one. If he handled contracts, he could have written in loopholes that would give him a huge cut of any earnings resulting from Klavier’s band, the Gavinners.

Now I know what you’re thinking, Klavier himself is a legal prodigy. He could have easily read through anything Kristoph prepared and refused to sign on the dotted line if he found anything amiss or hidden in the fine print. What if Kristoph’s legal control of Klavier started much earlier than that? Depending on when Klavier started in the entertainment business, which could have been a very early age, Kristoph could have had plenty of time and opportunity to secure access to any of Klavier’s future earnings, especially if their parents were out of the picture.

 If you think Kristoph has nothing to do with the Gavinners, think about it. One of their songs is literally called “Atroquinine, My Love”. They are a brand. They are marketed specifically to teeny boppers. They’re not squeaky clean mainstream pop like the Jonas Brothers or anything, but they are marketable. The advertising, the way they dress, the way Klavier says he’s tired of the youthful angst scene, the fact that Klavier only gives Apollo and Trucy a 20% discount on concert tickets. I’m just saying a lot of it could end up being contrived, perhaps by a certain someone with an ulterior motive. It seems really, really weird and coincidental that the band broke up right after AA4 too. Klavier seems like he’s really dedicated to his art, and to music. This much is clear in the way he reverently talks about Lamiroir, how he teared up at her song, even the Guitars’ Serenade seems like a very different song than what the Gavinners would typically do, and it only debuts after Kristoph is already in jail.

It makes you wonder if there might be a little something more going on here. If Kristoph had it set up to where he could get access to Klavier’s assets, which almost certainly dwarf his own by several times, then he had every reason to want to crush Klavier in court. He had to be the one to face Klavier in the Gramarye trial and win, causing Klavier to end his prosecutor dreams - and do what?

Go back on the road, put everything into his music career and become a workhorse for Kristoph’s ambitions.

Putting Klavier full time on the Gavinners would have solved all of Kristoph’s monetary worries for good. He could skim everything off the top and finally live the beautiful life of his dreams, the life he needed to have and couldn’t do without. Most importantly, he could keep up appearances and always look continually young and attractive.

Until we learn otherwise, I think that that is really all that was behind Kristoph’s black Psychelocks. Just a narcissistic, vain, preening loser masquerading as some mastermind villain when, in the end, that’s not really what he cared about being. He cared about painting his nails in a luxurious mansion surrounded by piles of money in a big Scrooge McDuck money vault, and laughing maniacally at anyone who ever thought that there was anything more to it.

[btsslowburnfic]

The Arrangement Chapter 4

Series Summary: Desperately in need of money, you answered the questionable ad. AKA-Arranged marriage AU featuring Y/N and Yoongi.

Chapter Summary: The job interview continues, and Yoongi finally takes an interest

Author’s Note: I wrote a massive amount of this story last weekend and I am super happy with it. I can’t wait to share the rest of the chapters with you guys each Thursday <3 

Previous chapter here  ---------------------------------

You left Grindhouse feeling better about the job. Mostly. It was clear that Kim Namjoon, you resolved to try and use his real name in case you ended up working together, wasn’t your biggest fan but he did respect that you had researched the position. 

Parts of the job were definitely strange. The strangest part? Agreeing to get married if the client decided “he wanted to.” No pressure. Totally a normal thing.  You thought back to the interview

--------

“I’m sorry. So this is like a mail-order bride type thing?” You wrinkled your brow in confusion.

“Technically internet-order bride, and don’t make that face, it will give you wrinkles,” Namjoon replied waving his hand in front of his face.

“Ok fine. Walk me through a day in this job.”

“Huh. This is usually where half the girls laugh at me and leave.”

You awkwardly shrugged your shoulders and waited for him to answer your question.

“Wake up, check the itinerary for the day. A work schedule will be emailed to you every morning by 7 am. Ensure the client makes it to their appointments on time, accompany the client to events both domestic and international, organize small social events. Any and all of these things. Whatever the client asks for. I’m sure he’ll have work for you to do. You are also responsible for posting appropriately to social media about your burgeoning love story,” Namjoon looks boredly over at the door, surprised that Yoongi never came back.

You wrote down some notes. “ Will I be provided social media accounts? I don’t really want to use my own. “

“Yes, they would be monitored and managed by BigHit behind the scenes.”

“Ok.” You jotted a few things down. “I saw that I would be living on-premise. Would I still be able to see my family and how far away is the location?”

“Yes. The apartment is actually at BigHit Headquarters. Several floors are dedicated to staff apartments. You may see your siblings if you put in appropriate time off requests and mark yourself out. You may not skip important company events. You must also sign a nondisclosure agreement upon the beginning of the contract. Your family and everyone else can’t know you are being compensated for your role outside of personal assistant. As you can imagine, it would look bad for the company.”

“Ok. That makes sense.”

“One last question [Y/N]: Why are you so nonchalant about this job? The marriage stipulation had most of the girls running off. And I can’t tell you how many cards I handed out that never signed in.”

You pouted, “ And here I thought I was special.” You laughed dryly as he rolled his eyes. “Dude, I’m not getting any younger. Dating sucks. I might as well get paid to do it.” You flipped your hair behind your shoulders. “This is a lot of money. If I end up getting married, it’s just a piece of paper. As long as the guy’s not a total asshole I really don’t care.”

“Oh yeah?” Namjoon clicks his pen a few times, “What if he’s really ugly? Is the money good enough to make up for that?”

You don’t miss a beat, “I’m more of a personality gal myself. Which may explain why you and I aren’t exactly hitting it off,” you mused and he just laughed at you, beginning to acclimate to your dry sense of humor.

“Yeah. That’s why.” He rolled his eyes. “All  right. We’re done here. If you make it to the next round you’ll receive an email within the next few days.

----

Well that was a fucking disaster, Namjoon thought as he walked back over to the office. Three. He had started with 50 cards distributed. 20 returns. And three candidates that showed an interest after finding out more about the job. He groaned. Why had BPD thought this was a good idea? He took his phone out as he entered the lobby and to Namjoon’s absolute shock he saw that Yoongi had scheduled a meeting for the two of them that afternoon. 

Two things were extremely out of character: one that Yoongi had even scheduled a meeting at all; most of the time Yoongi had to be dragged, kicking and screaming, to the meetings. Two, that he actually took the time to put it in the agenda. He most often showed up when he felt like, walked into Namjoon’s office, bypassed a yelling Jimin, and then complained about something. 

Namjoon rode the elevator up to his floor. He didn’t get a chance to eat since the interviews had taken all of his lunch hour. He exited and walked over to Jimin. “Order me lunch. Surprise me.” 

“Of course Sir,” Jimin dutifully replied and pulled up the food ordering App. 

“Thank you. When Yoongi gets here send him on in.”

Jimin straightened up a few items on his desk, “Usually I have trouble keeping him out sir, but I understand.” Jimin was dying to know what was going on. Yoongi and Namjoon usually avoided each other but had interacted thrice now within the week. He resolved to make a coffee delivery mid-meeting. Yes. Excellent. Jimin smirked as he placed the food order and sent it. 

Namjoon took out the three remaining folders and placed them on his desk. Hopefully this meeting meant Yoongi had stopped being a little shit and decided to go along with it. He took out the paperwork he had prepared for Yoongi, a similar NDA to the one he had discussed with [Y/N].

An hour passed where he ate his lunch and caught up on emails.

Yoongi exited the elevator and lazily walked over to Jimin. “Is Namjoon ready?”

Jimin raised his delicate eyebrows. “You’re actually stopping to ask? Well that’s a first.”

Yoongi stuffed his hands into his pockets and rolled his eyes. “I’ll just head in then.”

Jimin sat there, utterly confused but also strangely excited. He ordered two coffees in preparation for his eavesdropping. Yoongi had never, ever stopped at the reception desk. Or made an appointment. Since when was he playing nice?

Jimin: GUYS. Yoongi and Namjooon are meeting for the third time this week. And Yoongi actually made an appointment.

JK: Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?

V: Are you serious?

Jimin: Yes. I’m sneaking in there in half an hour. I’ll report back.

Jimin didn’t know why he cared so much. It was just that Yoongi was such a mystery compared to the rest of the guys. He was good looking, talented, but kept to himself and seemed to resent everything and everyone else that worked there.

Yoongi opened the door to the office. Namjoon looked up from his desk, “Yoongi. You left the interviews early, I’m surprised to see you made an appointment this afternoon.”

Yoongi walked closer to the desk, rubbing the back of his neck. “Yeah well I had seen everything I needed to see, and heard everything I needed to hear.” He looked down at the desk. “Are those all the candidates that are left?” 

“Yes. Unsurprisingly it was difficult to explain the situation without sounding like we are running an escort service, as you can imagine.”

Yoongi had been practicing the conversation he wanted to have since he got back to the building earlier after the girl returned his headphones. “Are there any headshots included in these?” He asked, feigning nonchalance.

“Nope,” Namjoon replied, looking over the NDA. “You said you didn’t want to be, and I quote, unduly influenced by physical appearance.” 

“Huh. Ok.” Yoongi responded. He didn’t want Namjoon to know that he had met one of the women who had applied for the job. Wait. She had said she worked somewhere nearby. “Can I see the resumes?”

“Knock yourself out.” He said, pushing the papers toward the edge of the desk.

He flipped through them. The first one was a model. Nope. The second one was an office worker. The third one listed two jobs, including Club Tokki. That was the woman he had met earlier. She had gone back and completed the interview. Despite trying to school his face, he let a small smile creep across his face.

“Find something you like there?” Namjoon asked. 

“These two sound interesting.” He handed two of the folders back to Namjoon. 

Namjoon looked at the two he had kept, “Of course you dumped the model. Here we have Lisa. She’s nice. Boring but Nice. And [Y/N]. You know what? I’m not even going to tell you anything. She’s something. Let’s invite her just to see what happens.” 

Yoongi stood there for a moment, swiping his lips with his tongue. Really? It had been that easy? 

“Here. You need to sign this. It’s an NDA about the situation. As far as anybody else knows, the girl we hire is your assistant. None of this was arranged before time. Additionally, you are to tell her that you want this, not that Big Hit is forcing you to do this.”

Yoongi puffed out his cheeks, “Why does that matter if she’s in on it?”

“Plausible deniability on the company’s part I’m sure. I didn't write the contract, BPD and the attorneys did.”

Yoongi sat down and started to read through the document.

Jimin knocked lightly on the door before entering. “Coffee gentleman? I have two iced Americanos right here.” He walked towards the desk.

“Thanks Jimin, put them on the desk.” Namjoon said, standing with the files in his hand.

“Ooo am I getting a new coworker?” Jimin tried to ask casually.

“Yoongi’s getting an assistant.” Namjoon responded.

“Good maybe someone will actually answer when I call down to the studio.” Jimin quipped.

Yoongi snorted, “As if I would let her in MY studio.”

“Enjoy your coffee, Sugar,” Jimin said, purposefully pronouncing his alias incorrectly.

“It’s Suga. Thanks for the coffee.”

Jimin blinked slowly, not sure how to respond to Yoongi saying something half-nice to him and slowly exited the room.

Yoongi picked up the coffee, sipping it while he finished reading the document. “Alright. Give me the pen.”

Namjoon was excited to be moving forward on this stupid project. If it actually worked, he hoped he would have to babysit Yoongi way less. “Here you go. You need to come to the next round of interviews. I think it’s important for you to meet each other.”

“Yeah, ok.” Yoongi signed the paperwork and stood up. “Put it on the calendar. See you.”

NEXT CHAPTER

Taglist:  @lidda​ @anpanman-sonyeondan​ @firefairy1​

[askaceattorney]

Turnabout Memories

Hello and hap’piraki, everyone!

(Whoa...  Déjà vu.)

Now that we’re finally nearing the end of this (*twitch, twitch*) year, and now that I’m preparing to step off this blog for a time, I’d like to take a moment to reminisce about all the ground we’ve covered since the day I first discovered the uniquely fun experience of Ask Ace Attorney.

It all began a few years ago when...

Oh, right -- this’ll probably be pretty lengthy, so I’ll continue below the cut.

It all began a few years ago when I discovered Ask Ace Attorney through a Google search.  I don’t remember most of the details, but when I first found out about a blog that attempts to bring video game characters to life through blog posts and the power of imagination, I thought the idea was both strange...and amazing.

I’d only recently started getting into Ace Attorney at the time (after seeing Matthew Taranto’s hilarious mashup between it and the Kirby series), so I decided to send in a few letters and see if they’d get an answer.  Sure enough, a few months later, I saw the first response to one of them!  It was a pretty exciting feeling, to say the least.

I’d share that letter response here, but unfortunately, it included my real name, so we’ll have to save it for later.  For now, here are a couple of the earliest ones from me: a deeply emotional one from Dahlia to Iris (a little far-fetched, maybe, but I CAN SEE IT HAPPENING, THE MOD), and a short, punny one from Moe to Phoenix.  Not surprisingly, I enjoyed seeing the characters react to them in ways I found believable as much as I enjoyed writing these and several other letters.  I knew the Mod (the only moderator here at the time) wasn’t affiliated with Capcom, but his character portrayals were spot-on each time, and my creative spark and love for Ace Attorney received some constant fuel for a while thanks to this blog.

And then...this happened.  For a brief moment, I thought about how fun it would be to see if I could do what the Mod had been doing for so long, but then I decided it’d probably be better to leave it in someone else’s hands.  Sure, I was a huge fan of Ace Attorney and its loveable characters, but did I really love them enough to pretend to be them on a hugely popular blog?  Naaah.

I went over the rest of that story once before, so I’ll just give a brief recap here: my friend the Modthorne won the audition to become the next de Modder, I asked her if I could join, and then it ended up just being me here, followed by Mods Paups, Kristoph, and Maya.  That’s the way we became the Ask Ace Attorney bunch.

So, when I first made my debut as the Commode Co-Mod, my only real strategy for answering letters was to emulate the Mod's style.  I honestly wondered if I could accurately portray so many different personalities in a believable way, but, with a few hiccups along the way, I somehow managed to pull it off to some degree.  I also started developing my own style and becoming less conscientious about how my portrayals looked (that definitely took some time, though), and worrying less about the blog’s popularity and overall performance review.  That, I believe, was a big part of what made both of those steadily rise over time, until we ended up reaching and surpassing 12,000 followers!  (I’m still geekin’ out about that one.)  Just relaxing and going with the flow made things a lot easier for me, and apparently helped Ask Ace Attorney reach its current level of popularity.  Something tells me that choice paid off in the end, and thank goodness.

I of course have to give credit to the popularity of Ace Attorney and its characters, as well as the Mod for giving me and the other moderators so much material to start off with, but I sure never expected my role in helping to build the Ace Attorney fandom’s strength and size to be quite this large.  Heck, just getting to create things for so many people is a huge honor, so...what can I say to that, except a huge thank you to Capcom and the Mod?

Don’t worry, I’ll get to thanking all of you in just a moment.  ; )

So, anyway, that’s all the general stuff.  Let’s talk about the highlights of the last three years, now, shall we?

My first holiday-related post was an April Fool’s Day one, so let’s start there.  We came close to hearing about Phoenix’s lawyer camp incident...

...gave a few of the characters a chance to ask some questions of their own...

...had a little run-in with some of the bad guys...

...and briefly opened the window into some characters’ minds.

We sure didn’t fool around when it came to fooling around, did we?

Then there was Halloween.  We dealt with a creeper in the darkness...

...let one of the lesser-known characters go on a brief venture beyond the fourth wall...

...let some characters switch outfits and personalities for a short while...

...and paid homage to a classic interactive cartoon by letting them give out candy.

We sure had our fill of sweets and spooks, didn’t we?

And then there was Christmas, which included some of my favorite content.  We enjoyed a musical performance by several members of the Ace Attorney cast...

...a less flattering musical performance by yours truly...

...a short play taking place in Pearls’s dreams...

...and a fan-made song parody about a non-canon (but believable) incident involving Phoenix and a reindeer.

(Sorry if that image cursed anyone for life, by the way.)

I don’t know about you, but I loved every bit of our holiday hijinks.

And of course, we can’t leave out some of the great moments that occurred on non-holidays, including Her Benevolence falling victim to a classic comedy gag...

...Pearls meeting herself from a different time period somehow...

...Apollo taking a trip to the Pokemon world in his dreams...

...Athena getting tricked into thinking she had passed on briefly...

...Trucy getting caught red-handed by Arnold Schwarzenegger himself...

...and, uh...this thing happening to Iris.

No idea what I was thinking back then.  Sometimes you just have to go with the moment.

Not to mention one letter response that received an unexpected explosion of popularity.  Edgeworth always did know how to drop a sass bomb, didn’t he?  And one moment I’ll likely never forget is the letter regarding Athena’s hair.  For the record, I thought the shorter hairstyle looked okay, but somehow I didn’t think she would feel the same way.  Make of that what you will.  X )

Of course, it wasn’t all fun times and laughter -- I ended up stepping on some toes by accident, making a few jokes in bad taste, struggling to keep a balance between blogging and the real world, and...well...

...that happened.  I don’t regret a moment of it, though, because if Ace Attorney (and life) have taught me anything, it’s that powering through the less enjoyable moments in life is what makes us stronger, and what makes the good times that much more enjoyable.

But out of all the fun, hilarious, thought-provoking, and deeply touching moments that stood out in the last three years of blogging, the one I would say I enjoyed the most is this one.  It was my first attempt at responding to a letter in character (with one of the biggest “characters” in the series, no less), but, as with many of my letter responses, it also included some of me in it -- specifically, the part where Athena tries to sound optimistic, but not too prideful.  That was the sort of attitude I wanted to have whenever I answered letters -- I wanted to keep the fun and creativity of Ace Attorney and its characters going without injecting too much of myself into it.  The series wasn’t mine, after all, and neither was the blog, so my main goal was simply to sound like the characters.

And with that in mind, let me just say this: If any of these letters (even one of them) have made you smile or laugh on an unpleasant day, made you think about things from a different perspective, or simply helped you suspend your disbelief for a moment and believe you’re actually talking to someone from a video game, then my goal has been reached.

Anyway, I didn’t mean for this to be my goodbye speech (I’m saving that for later).  What it is is a sincere thank you for the fun and creativity that I and the rest of the moderators were able to engage in with all of you, thanks to our shared love of Ace Attorney, its characters, and its unique humor and depth.  Every last piece of witty dialogue, every picture, every song, and every custom sprite (the last of which can be found here), was inspired by your creativity and willingness to participate in this imaginative collaboration work.

I hope you’ve enjoyed it at least half as much as I have.  You guys are awesome.

-The Co-Mod

[brave-clarice]

“Clarice” Liveblog: Episode 1

Here are my extremely unfashionably late takes! They’re long, so strap in if you want.

okay, I genuinely thought the scenes in Gumb’s basement were ripped from the film for a second. extremely well done.

I both appreciate that they’re acknowledging the Bureau-mandated psych eval Clarice would have to go through (not sure she’d have to have another one a year later?)...

...but I sure wish they hadn’t chosen to open this show in a therapy-like session. it’s going to be subject to enough NBC comparisons as it is.

gosh, Rebecca Breeds is so pretty, and in the same almost, idk, elfin kind of way Jodie Foster is.

“Bride of Frankenstein”! a novel reference! and a Hannibal Lecter reference even though they can’t use his name! I’m excited

I was afraid of this part, though--everyone’s going to call her “Clarice” aren’t they?

it’s very significant that in the books, Hannibal is virtually alone in using her first name to address her; even Ardelia calls her “Starling.” but of course this series chose “Clarice” as its title, so...

“the checkout lady at the Safeway asked me to autograph a melon” omg

so Clarice has supposedly been “mandated” to see an FBI therapist for an entire year? hmm.

tbh, this feels kind of like a proxy for Hannibal’s scenes in the movie, especially with the therapist calling her “Clarice.” not sure if I dig it.

“...given that your last therapist was an inmate” Hannibal reference #2!

they’re explicitly talking about Hannibal without being able to name him and it’s hilarious, frustrating, and immensely satisfying all at once.

there’s no way to avoid talking about him altogether without being disingenuous to Clarice’s eventual character arc, so I’m glad they’re ripping off the band-aid early

“you let that relationship be intimate”  Yeah, Clarice and Hannibal’s relationship IS intimate and YOU! SHOULD! SAY IT!!!

it’s kind of ridiculous for this guy/the show not to acknowledge that little trainee Clarice was sent to see Hannibal by someone who should’ve known better. That Crawford was doing it with the intention to save lives doesn’t mean he didn’t use the shit out of Clarice.

that’s not to take away her agency or minimize the choices she made after she met Hannibal. She wouldn’t have been in a position to make those choices if Crawford hadn’t arranged it, though.

even if they don’t have the rights to Crawford’s name, either (I have to assume that’s the case) couldn’t they at least mention this??

“hasn’t seen her own family in years” Are they actually going to address Clarice’s maybe-dead-maybe-not mother (depending on the canon they adopt, book or film) and possible siblings??? Please tell me they are!

Clarice’s “egregious” PTSD doesn’t have much to do with Buffalo Bill ofc, and this therapist seems to be making excuses to be the first in a long line of men getting in the way of Clarice’s career goals...

...which she recognizes and confronts him about. Call him out!!!

*Anthony Hopkins voice* That’s my girl.

the way she’s been written in this scene gives me a lot of hope going forward! she’s funny, she doesn’t take any sexist bullshit, she’s calm and polite but you get a glimpse of the rage underneath. 

wow, they promoted Senator Martin to Attorney General!

the opening credits (if you can even call them that) are a let-down, though

she has her beads!

can anyone who’s not Hannibal please stop calling her Clarice

wonder if they’re going to touch on any of the extreme tension that existed between Senator Martin and Clarice in the novel? they didn’t interact in the movie, but in the book, Martin is under intense stress, and it doesn’t go smoothly.

of course in “Hannibal,” Martin invites her to “ride horses,” so they obviously reconciled after Catherine’s rescue and kept in some kind of touch.

and speak of the devil: horses! (and Catherine)

“I can’t have a reputation, I’ve only done it once” Thank you for being the voice of reason, Clarice.

“Paul Krendler” *ugly screaming commences*

“you don’t have any people, Clarice” Aaand that’s the plot of the Hannibal novel!

looks like they even gave her the ring Jodie’s Clarice wears!

oh yeah, this Krendler looks like a sumbitch if I ever saw one. No one will ever be as perfectly cast as the dude in Silence imo, but a much better fit than Ray Liotta. 

“small carat, but it’s a sweet ring” A very in-character observation probably directly informed by her comments about nail polish in Silence.

she mentions this victim’s nail polish (!) being “tasteful,” and I shrieked a little again.

I understand it’s necessary for Krendler to be a douche, but there’s not even going to be any payoff for the audience (or Clarice) when Hannibal eats him, so boo.

wait...wait, why aren’t Clarice and Ardelia in their Alexandria duplex? They’re not just best friends, they’re roommates! For the entire seven-year story! GIVE ME THE DUPLEX!!!

BUT points for Ardelia bringing Clarice a treat, since she was always leaving her candy bars in the Silence book!

Clarice interacting with the washer/dryer is a nice nod to the books, too.

speaking of... “What did we learn in the laundry room back at Quantico?” For some reason this line made me actually cry, I guess because this whole episode has been such a love letter to something I love so dearly, and it’s making me emotional.

FIRST PRINCIPLES!

DESPERATELY RANDOM!!!

wow, the men in Clarice’s new office giving her lotion as a hazing “welcome” gift is awful, and now I’m just mad (which is the point of the scene ofc).

so this ex-military OC is the John Brigham stand-in, I take it?

if that means John Brigham won’t be here, No Thanks.

Clarice telling him she’ll drive...a tribute to Dana “Why Do You Always Have to Drive?” Scully, perhaps (who was herself inspired by Clarice) as well as a nod to Clarice’s love of cars?

“Why do they call you the bride of Frankenstein?” Sorry, I don’t have the legal rights to tell you about my last intimate relationship.

“Already on my way to West Virginia Granny Witch” Look, this show could crash and burn from this scene on, and it would still have been worth it just for these first 25 minutes.

I like that Clarice is shown wanting to help people, and the scene of her with the baby is a nice call-back to the eventual shoot-out at the beginning of “Hannibal”...but I hope they don’t try to domesticate her too much. Clarice needs her hard edges. To be tough (reasonably so)--a cub growing into its big cat’s claws.

also, somehow I doubt that Miss Valedictorian spent her six years in the Lutheran home “changing a lot of diapers,” but sure, okay. If her siblings are alive in this, she might have changed their diapers!

even though Krendler’s a real dickwad so far, he’s not slimy enough for me. Needs more grease.

“I got a call from your therapist who’s concerned that you might genuinely flip out” I really do not like this subplot Sam-I-Am. Aren’t the huge glass ceiling/Boys’ Club obstacles enough?

seriously, though, I know Hannibal tells her that the metaphorical lambs will come back--at the end of Silence, though, she’s at some kind of temporary peace, not in danger of “flipping out” any time soon.

if Esquivel really is our Brigham stand-in, I’ve got...problems with that. He was Clarice’s teacher and became her friend, not some Krendler double-agent. (Also worried they’re setting him up as a love interest for her which...eesh, no thanks.)

and sorry, I actually hate that Catherine kept Precious the dog in this.

I have no problem with Catherine being a character, or with her interacting with Clarice...that said, I don’t know if her being shown as severely traumatized and reaching out to Clarice as a form of emotional lifeline is...a good idea?

I understand the symbolism of Catherine’s smashed mirror, but...smashed mirrors are already a Thing in this series (albeit not Clarice’s chapter in it), and that’s all I can think of here.

Catherine’s a victim of unthinkable trauma. Nevertheless...she’s talking to the woman who saved her life. Who risked death to do it. I just don’t like the way this scene is written. Apparently, in this show’s canon, Catherine hasn’t gotten the help she needs. But Clarice isn’t her therapist, and it’s upsetting to have Catherine being all “I’ll never be safe and neither will you.”

how does Catherine remember “the mannequins, the autopsy table”?? And why is she throwing them in Clarice’s face?

I’m going to stop talking about this scene now because it’s making me angry and a little upset, which is maybe the point? I just don’t think it’s written well. If Catherine’s going to be a recurring character, I hope she’s shown getting professional, medical help.

Clarice finding the victim’s papers in the box of pads is a direct callback to her finding the photos in the jewelry box in Silence. Nice.

let’s agree that Hannibal and Crawford are both in Ardelia’s (too-cutesy-for-me) book

another nice little X-Files homage?

I have some qualms about that big climax, but...meh. It was capital-F Fine.

Yikes, this is a full week late. Thanks for reading this entirely-too-long post through to the end, if you’re still here! 

To sum up my thoughts...

The Good: 

the visual connections to the Silence film (that green coat/blue knit scarf combo in particular)

Rebecca Breeds’ performance overall so far

Clarice’s strong writing/characterization

her sense of humor and her inclination to call out bullshit

maybe it was just me, but I also got a sense of Hannibal’s influence on her in some of her dialogue--her blunt observations--and I love it

Ardelia Mapp

the repeated in-your-face references to Hannibal Lecter

the respectful, non-exploitative way the victims were treated by the narrative.

let’s just say, not all Harris-inspired shows managed to do this. :)

the many, many allusions to the novel

“you let that relationship be INTIMATE” !!!

The Bad: 

the near-constant implication that all Clarice’s trauma stems from her experiences in Gumb’s basement

I just don’t understand this one...it’s not supported by the text imo

the “Clarice-is-a-psychological-loose-canon” subplot

almost everyone calling her “Clarice”

NO DUPLEX IN ALEXANDRIA! Boo!

Esquivel maybe replacing Brigham

the narrative choices they’ve made surrounding Catherine so far.

Seriously: please let Catherine seek/get help instead of screaming “HELP ME” at Clarice, who after all risked her own life to save Catherine’s, over the phone.

The Ugly: Paul Krendler, lol. Confession time: I also don’t care for the way they’ve styled her hair. Not sure why it bugs me, it just...does.

Overall, I’m thrilled to death with this. I was so afraid it would be disappointing, so even if it’s not a five-star episode (and pilots rarely are), it’s a great beginning! It’s beyond amazing to see our girl on the screen again. Just this hour-long episode did her character way more justice than the entire Hannibal film. Despite its shortcomings, it’s such a loving homage to characters and a story that mean a lot to me, and I love it just for that.

Going forward, I’d like to see more of Clarice as a person. Her hobbies and interests--cars, sharpshooting, running, fashion magazines stuffed under her bed, horseback riding, her total inability to cook...anything would do. I of course want to see more of her with Ardelia. I want to hear more about her backstory and find out which version of it (truly orphaned when her father dies or sent away by her mother) they’ll choose to explore. And while we all agree that this show is about Clarice and she don’t need no man, I won’t lie: I’d gobble up more sly references to Hannibal. He’s her endgame, after all.

I’d also like to really see the warrior underneath. There are flashes of her in the last twenty minutes of this episode. But Clarice Starling is a big cat, she’s a warrior, she’s between iron and silver. I’d hate for her to spend most of this show doe-eyed and traumatized. I want her to be ferocious, to see the woman who’s a match for the monster.

Krendler needs to get nastier. He should make us feel like we need to shower. In the novels, he wants to use Clarice--only for her body. And when she won’t allow him to, he takes his revenge. That’s what makes him so particularly awful. Let’s amp him up here.

And finally...maybe I’ll appreciate Catherine’s scene more on a second watch. Maybe I’m not being sensitive enough to her trauma, her struggles. But I didn’t like the way that scene was staged or scripted, and I didn’t like the suggestion that she just hasn’t gotten help after a year and is subsequently taking her pain out on Clarice on some level. I hope future episodes handle this subplot, and her character, a bit better.

Please let me know if you guys would like me to do another of these monstrosities for the next episode. (I promise it won’t take me an entire week this time!) And thank you again for reading!!! 

[dented-nado]

For the requests “stay, please” with Batman x Harv(ey), only if you want:). I love you’re writing!

Post-Redemption Bruharv(ey)! Thank you for sending this in! Sorry it took me so long to fill!

----

Bruce was concerned with how much time Harv(ey) was spending in their room. Since they had found out about Batman, and eventually been released from Arkham, they had taken Bruce up on his offer to house them knowing how difficult it would be for them to try and live a normal life on their own.

Harvey had greeted Bruce gratefully, and let him know how much they both appreciated it. But they were… quiet.

Bruce knew when he was quiet and shut himself in the room or the cave, something was wrong, or at least not well.

He had been pacing in a circle downstairs for at least 20 minutes knowing he should go up and talk to his friend… but not even beginning to know what to say or how to say it.

But he had to reach out… right? He’d promised to always be there for Harvey, so he couldn’t falter now, now that they were here within reach…

Bruce took a few deep breaths, bounced on his heels a few times to psych himself up and headed upstairs, counting the doors down the hall on the first floor to make sure he approached the right one and didn’t knock on an empty guest bedroom, feel like an idiot, and show himself to be a rich boy that didn’t know all the rooms in his own house.

He lightly knocked on the door. “Harvey? Harv? Is it okay if I come in?”

There was a slight pause, then a quiet “Yeah, it’s okay.”

Bruce waited a moment more for Harv to answer too.

“yeah.”

Harv had less words to say than Harvey, which wasn’t a good sign.

Bruce opened the door and stepped inside. Harv(ey) was sitting quietly on the bed knees to their chest and head perched on top. It seemed they had been lying on top of the blankets and hadn’t moved for a while.

He shut the door behind him and walked over, quietly sitting on the edge of the bed as he looked at his friend. For a moment he took slight notice in the novelty that they seemed to take the same sitting position Bruce did when he was down or nervous, then let the thought pass.

“Hey Harvey, Harv. You’ve been kind of quiet… is everything okay?” He asked, deciding to be blunt rather than beat around the bush.

“S’Fine.” Harv replied.

After a long pause, Harvey added. “Just tired is all.”

Bruce’s shoulders fell a little. There was something wrong. So, this is how others felt when he shut them out when he was obviously something going on.

Bruce furrowed his brows. “Is… Is there something I can do?” He suggested, quietly shifting to ready himself leave if necessary.

Something about the movement caused Harv(ey) to suddenly lunge forward and put their hand on Bruce’s. Harv looked down, slightly embarrassed, Harvey’s lips were pulled into a thin frown.

“Stay… Please” Harv barely whispered.

Bruce stared in shock for a moment before getting his bearings back and nodding. “Okay, Okay Harv I’ll stay.”

As Harv let go of his hand, Bruce shifted, slipping his shoes off so he could sit comfortably next to Harv(ey) on the bed. This time he took the initiative and took Harvey’s hand in his own.

“…I missed you this whole time you know.”

“Then realizing you were Batman… you had been there that whole time and I…” Harv grimaced and clenched his fists.

“I had hurt you.”

Bruce tilted his head sympathetically. “Harv… I’m okay.”

Harv shook his head. “You shouldn’t even be around me, after the things I did.”

“You didn’t know it was me Harv, you and Harvey both were sick, and I know Arkham didn’t give you the help you needed for a long time.” Bruce said trying to soothe.

“That… doesn’t feel like a good excuse.” Harv grumbled with a sigh.

“You’re probably the person I care most about in the world, to think that you suffered at any point because of me? Of us??” Harvey gripped Bruce’s hand a little tighter, leaning his head back as they closed their eyes.

“I don’t want you to beat yourself up over it Harv(ey), if you’ll recall, I hurt you too. It killed me inside every time I dragged you back to Arkham.” Bruce pointed out.

“You were doing the right thing, what excuse do we have??”

“How do we even begin to make amends??”

Bruce was at a loss for words. He didn’t know any other way to explain it to Harv(ey) that they didn’t need to beat themselves up. Once again… he felt a little bit like he was looking at a reflection of himself.

He nudged Harv(ey)’s arm. “Hey… I still care about you, about both of you… a lot.”

Harv gave him an odd look. “You’re nuts pretty boy.”

Bruce smiled. “Never said that I wasn’t!”

Harv huffed before chuckling.

“Cute.”

Bruce ignored the cute comment and decided to make an attempt at humor to maybe cheer his friend up.

“You know, if you want to ‘make up for it’ you could always go around punching criminals in a spooky outfit with me.” Bruce teased with a lopsided smile.

Harv(ey) raised their eyebrows.

“I know your joking, but I would gladly be a vigilante with you and kick the crud out of people.”

Bruce stared at him. “buh… but…. You… want to???”

“What would I even be? Batman number 2?”

Bruce snorted. “You could be your own thing, not just a second batman.”

“Two Bats are better than one.” Harvey suggested with a smirk.

“I mean… what else have I got to do?”

Bruce shook his head. “I could give you a job at my company.”

“You’re sweet Bruce, but Harv doesn’t want to do a desk job or anything that involves paperwork ever again.” Harvey admitted. “Not to mention the whole attorney thing that I put a lot of time into being able to do is kind of impossible now.”

Bruce nodded. “Ah… well that makes sense. But you don’t have to do what I do, maybe you could take up…” Bruce froze, what were normal hobbies. “…Rock… collecting?”

Harv poked Bruce’s cheek. “You were struggling to come up with a normal hobby, weren’t you?”

“No…” Bruce lied.

Harv(ey) smirked at him.

“…Yes.” Bruce admitted.

“I mean if you don’t want me to join your band of merry bat-men you’re welcome to say so, but maybe it’d be a constructive release for Harv, plus, he knows how criminals think.” Harvey suggested, hand now sliding around Bruce’s shoulders.

“Besides… I’d feel good to make up for being an asshole by fighting for and protecting my favorite pretty boy.”

Bruce turned a bit red but immediately went into Batman strategizing mode. “It… would be useful… and it’d be nice having you as a partner… er… co-worker.”

Harv seemed to grin. “Partner huh?”

Bruce leaned away and turned even redder. “Co-Worker.”

“You said partner first, no take-backs.”

Bruce grumbled.

“Is this the part where we say, “I do”?”

Bruce smiled despite himself as Harvey’s hand migrated to his waist.

“You’re silly.”

“Between you and Mr. Serious-Lawyer over here, someone has gotta bring some levity… and have the guts to do the flirting.”

Bruce inhaled sharply. Harv really was way more outwardly flirtatious than Harvey.

“Oh, right yes good.” Bruce stammered out quickly.

“Hey Bruce…?” Harvey interjected.

Bruce collected himself and snapped to attention. “Yes?”

“Thanks for checking in on us.” Harvey said, pressing his and Bruce’s foreheads together.

Bruce was immediately taken back to before Two-face, before Batman, when Harvey used to do this to quietly show his affection or would gently put his hand on the top of his head. The memories made him smile, his mind go a bit fuzzy and his heartbeat pick up just a little bit.

“Of course. Always Harvey, Harv… always.”

[dcbbw]

Six Sentence Sunday January 3, 2021

I haven’t posted a Six Sentence Sunday in forever! Fortunately, for the first Sunday of 2021, I have managed to get words and thoughts out of my head and onto paper (or screen).

Everything is under the cut (and it’s a little bit of a lot)

The Life We Lived, Chapter 3:

His wife nodded and reached over into his plate to grab his fish sandwich. She wasn’t a fan of the seafood, but it was deep fried, and the bread was loaded with mayo, lettuce, tomato, onions, and jalapenos. It looked delicious.

She was on her third bite when her husband returned. His eyes widened in disbelief at seeing both of Riley’s hands gripping half his sub sandwich, mayonnaise dripping from her lips. Without a word, he sat down, pulled her beef lo mein in front of him. and began eating it.

“What did Thomas want? Is the job offer at the firm still open?” Riley licked her lips before taking another hearty bite.

Liam twirled flavorful noodles around the tines of his fork before spearing tender pieces of beef. His expression was thoughtful when he looked at his wife. “He offered me a case, but it isn’t immigration. It’s criminal. Murder.”

Riley’s eyes widened. “You’re not a criminal attorney.”

“I know enough to be a public defender,” Liam argued. “And it’s pretty open and shut. Apparently, the accused is admitting guilt; they just want to not get the death penalty or life with no chance of parole.”

Riley snatched her beef lo mein away from Liam; she shoveled a huge forkful in her mouth. “How much?” she asked suspiciously.

Liam’s eyes held hers. “One million even.”

Riley choked on her food. “What the FUCK?? When do you start?”

Liam chuckled softly before leaning over and kissing Riley with the slightest hint of tongue. “Not so fast, there. That’s a lot of money from a person admitting they’re guilty of murder, of all things. Which makes me think there’s more here than meets the eye.”

Riley nodded slowly. “So, you’re gonna think about it?” she asked hopefully.

Untitled #WackyDrabble #76:

The King stood at his study’s window, his dark eyes peering up at an even darker sky. He held a glass of scotch in one hand; he absent-mindedly shook it, causing amber liquid to swirl gently. In his other hand, he held a black velvet ring box. His eyes left the starry sky to look down at the box.

Inside was a symbol of his devotion, loyalty, and commitment. That he would slide onto his fiancée’s finger tomorrow morning.

He would have a wife. Cordonia would have a Queen.

Except Cordonia was an exacting mistress, not easily appeased. Demands for an heir would soon follow, then a spare would be required.

This wasn’t supposed to be my life.

With a sigh, Liam tucked the jewelry box into his suit jacket pocket before closing the curtains; he turned away from the window and sank into the chocolate leather of his oversized chair. His eyes roamed over his desk: personal photographs, stacks of paperwork divided by progress and priority, a Bible of the Orthodox Church.

He lifted his head at a knock on the door; hope and eagerness flooded his body as he called for his visitor to enter. It fled as quickly as it came when he saw who his visitor was.

White Sock Fuckery (SGL Ask):

The October evening was damp and chilly. Streetlamps glowed pale yellow against the night. The heavy rain that had drenched the nation’s capital from sunrise to sunset had finally eased into a light mist. The few leaves left on the trees lining Rhode Island Avenue at Logan Circle were bent and downward facing with the weight of moisture.

A figure slid from the vehicle double parked in the street, a large bag filled with purchases clutched in one hand. They didn’t turn around to watch the vehicle drive away; they were too busy searching for keys. With an audible gasp of relief, fingers pulled out a keyring and the person entered the building.

In the lobby of the apartment complex, the person headed directly up the stairs to Unit #2. The hall was quiet, the lighting dim. More keys were inserted into locks, and the person was inside. They leaned against the closed front door, exhaling a sigh as they inhaled patchouli and the faint smell of cigarette smoke. Their eyes traveled quickly over the darkened rooms.

Unopened wine bottles on the kitchen counter, remote control tossed carelessly on the sofa, a pile of laundry tossed atop the stacked washer/dryer.

Still clutching the bag, the person traveled the short hallway that led to the bedroom. Flipping a switch filled the somewhat spacious area with bright light. Tossing the bag on the bed, the person went to the chest of drawers placed in the exact center between two of the room’s four windows. A quick glance at their watch informed them they had 15 minutes before their ride returned.

Pulling the top drawer open, the person’s eyes widened in a hybrid of horror, disbelief, and humor.

What the actual fuck?

Dress Up (SGL x Riley B Kinktober ask)

“You know I wouldn’t do anything you’re not ready for,” he assured her. “But I think we’re both ready for something. Let’s call it a tension breaker.”

“Tension breaker?” Riley arched a brow as her arms circled his neck.

“It has to be done,” Liam affirmed as his lips pulled hers into a deep kiss.

When they parted a full minute later, Liam whispered in her ear. “I want to touch your body, Riley B.”

Riley looked at him with eyes dark with desire and clouded with wariness. “No sex!”

“I know,” Liam nodded.

“You think I’m silly. And I probably am, but …”

Liam shook his head. “No. You’ve been hurt. I’m fine with going slowly. I just need you to remember I’m not those other guys. I’m not gonna dump you in Target or pop in for 15 minutes of your time every six months like Bootycall Keith.”

Riley kissed him softly on the cheek. “Thank you. I just … I wanna get it right this time.”

“Me too.” His fingers raked through her hair.

“And it’s Keith the Bootycall. Like Chance the Rapper.”

Liam rolled his eyes as he shrugged out of his shirt; he didn’t see why he had to get that scrub’s name right.

Sunday Bruch, Chapter 10

Olivia ate a hearty forkful of her roasted quail and root vegetable casserole. “Hamid wanted to join us, but I thought it best that this luncheon be girls only.”

Riley looked at her confused. “Why? I’d love to meet the man who took you away from Court.”

Olivia set her fork down; she leaned across the table so she and Riley were practically nose to nose. “First, no one took me away from Court. I am still very much a member; I just choose not to socialize with you heathens. Second, you’re pregnant with no idea who the father is. You don’t want this to become an international scandal! You do realize Hamid has his own kingdom to oversee? And he can be a Chatty Cathy with an especially … juicy tidbit.”

Riley nodded as Olivia pulled away. A pale hand swept across her crimson locks before the Duchess of Lythikos brought a wine glass to her lips.

“So, what are you going to do?”

Riley shrugged as she scooped venison, rice, and gravy. “Honestly, I don’t know. I want to stay with Maxwell. Thinking all the men have brown hair; all of us except Maxwell have brown eyes. Maybe Max is the dad by default?”

Olivia blinked. This woman cannot be this fucking stupid! She lightly cleared her throat.

“How were you ever Queen?” Olivia huffed. “You do know none of these men look alike, right? As much as I love a good drama, the smart thing … the responsible thing to do is to have a DNA test done. Then sit down and have a talk with Maxwell and the child’s father.”

“NO!” Riley exclaimed, bits of food flying from her mouth. “I can’t do that! That’s just … out of the question!”

“You should have thought of that before having a threesome with Drake Walker and Rashad Domvallier.”

“It was just something to do,” Riley muttered.

“Now it’s become someone to raise.” Olivia sliced into a savory yam. “THIS is why I no longer come around. You people are a circle jerk of messy sex and share relationships. I have found keeping your circle small helps keep your hole tight.”

Untitled Laxwell:

In the kitchen, he found his lover sitting in the dark at the  dining table. The flipping of the light switch revealed a decanter of scotch sat beside him, and a glass of the liquor was in front of him. His blue eyes lifted long enough to take in his boyfriend’s slightly disheveled countenance.

“Rain wake you up?’ he asked as he took a swallow of his drink.

Liam shook his head, frowning slightly. Maxwell wasn’t a drinker; he wanted to be, but the most the younger Beaumont could handle was a glass of wine. Two, at most. Anything more or something stronger went to his head immediately. And Maxwell tended to be a belligerent drunk, his ire fueled by jealousy.

Liam sat down cautiously across from his boyfriend.

“What are you doing up? And drinking?”

Maxwell shrugged while tugging at his wrinkled tee shirt. “Thinking.”

“About what?”

Maxwell said nothing as he picked up his glass to drink more scotch.

“How many glasses have you had?” Liam asked suspiciously.

“This is my second.”

“So, what are you thinking about that has you up in the middle of the night, drinking scotch?”

Liam settled back in his chair, outstretching his arm so his hand covered Maxwell’s .A slight smile quickly flickered across the young Lord’s lips. When he raised his face to look at Liam, his expression was blank but his eyes sad.

“My mother.” It was simply said, but Liam knew the pain that lay behind the two words.

Untitled JGL one-shot:

One night, soon after Liam Rys started, I found myself staying late to help out the accounting team. Quarterly reports were coming up which meant every broker needed their monthly numbers. Of course, a good broker keeps their own numbers, but with Barthelemy as Managing Director, there are no good brokers.

Just a bunch of good old boy club members who like to smoke cigars, drink liquor, and grope tits.

And then there are the rest of us.

I run the numbers for my team and go to drop Liam’s reports off at his desk; when I reach his cubicle, I stop short. It’s after 8 pm, and he is hunched over his desk. His cheeks are flushed, he’s  gnawed his lower lip raw, and wears a scowl of vexation on his face.

“What are you still doing here?” I ask as I lay the reports in his inbox.

His dark eyes glance up at me before falling back down to the computer screen. “I have to put together a portfolio for a new client by tomorrow morning. Came straight from the Managing Director.”

“And it has you looking like that?”

“He has very specific stocks he wants to invest in, but none of them are going to give the client the yield the MD insists upon.”

I roll my eyes and hold out my hand to see the mock portfolio. With a sigh, Liam passes it to me before leaning back in his chair. He rubs his eyes, and glances at the clock. He pulls open a desk drawer and grabs an apple.

I look around for a place to sit in the small cubicle, but there isn’t any. Liam’s bicycle takes up all the available space. Instead, I kick off my heels and rest against the cloth-covered partition as I quickly review the documents.

“They’re playing you,” I state flatly as I pass the papers back.

Liam looks at me,  confusion and an underlying hardness in his eyes. “What do you mean by that?”

“What they’re asking of you is impossible. All the stocks are duds, poor performers. They set you up to fail. Or go crazy, whichever one comes first.”

 Not tagging folks; if you see it and want to play, feel free to do so!

[jake-marshall]

writer interview game

tagged by @beck-a-leck​ Tagging:  jesus idk, anyone who feels like doing this? Names:  well my writer handle on ao3 is copernicusjones and has been since I made the account in 2015.  I wanted something that wasn’t fandom specific even though I’ve come to find out Copernicus Jones is the name of a comic about a robot of the same name.  idfk.  I just picked it because it was a dumb inside joke with a coworker at the time. Fandoms:  Well, most recently I’ve written predominantly for the Tarantino films Inglourious Basterds and Reservoir Dogs, but my old standby is Harvest Moon/Story of Seasons (and I guess Rune Factory, too), and the fandom I have the most fics for is Ace Attorney (which I recently came back to while playing The Great Ace Attorney Chronicles).  I guess you could count Harry Potter too since I’ve written a couple fics about Percy Weasley. Two-Shots: fdjajsf;kj  There’s my Miego fic Spilling the Truth and my Blackbright fic Price of Admission as well as my Rune Factory 4 Leon/Xiao Pai fic No Time Like the Present Most Popular Multi-Chapter Fic:  That would be my Blackbright fic The Road Less Traveled Actual worst part about writing:  I love editing as I go but editing the whole thing after I’ve completed a piece and before I post it is just draining. How you choose your titles:  Usually a play on words/idiom or song lyrics.  Sometimes a reference to the source material (like “Business is Booming” or “You’re My Light”) Do you outline?  Very much so.  I have no idea how or why people “Pants” their way through fics, just the thought of it makes me anxious and lock up.   Ideas you'll probably never get around to, but wouldn't it be nice?  Percy and Audrey Weasley’s epic love story. Spicy tangential opinions:  Uhhh, what’s considered spicy nowadays?  Idk something that’s always peeved me that I wish people would Shut Up About is, there’s people willing to write a 5 page essay about why they “don’t comment” but then can’t write a one-word sentence telling the author “Hey this is great, I really loved it!” Not that I think authors are entitled to feedback and that people’s reasonings aren’t valid, but a lot of it seems to be “I don’t know what to say” and then they sure do know what to say about why they don’t know what to say.   ??? Callouts @ me:  Can’t commit to a project, even less so to a fandom.  Overuses commas and the em dash. Best writing traits: I know I’m great at dialogue and humor - I get complimented a lot on characters sounding very IC when I write their dialogue.  I mean I think I’m pretty skilled in all facets but dialogue is one of my strongest suits.