#i would have ruined at least one take by jumping over the table to yell at joel and accuse him of being a cheating cheater who cheats

[sparkly-skies]

The face of a man planning the slow and painful murder of his good friend Joel, 30, who never learned to shuffle cards

[piedinthepiper]

Liked ★

Yandere!Seokjin x fem!reader

Summary: You liked him, liked as in past tense. Liked as in you didn’t like him anymore. He didn’t believe it for a second, and he’ll do anything to make you like him again.

Warnings: Cursing, stalking, Jin is kinda narcissistic?, he’s also mean and delusional, possessiveness, jealousy, voyeurism, smut, drugging, implied kidnapping

Wc: 5.9k

A/n: based on this req! Love the idea, hope you like it!

Disclaimer: This is 100% fiction. I am in no way saying that this is how any member of bts would act. Nor do I condone the actions detailed in the story. This is purely for entertainment purposes only. If any of the warnings trigger you, or you’re under 18 ¡do not read! I’m not your mother, and I don’t take any accountability for what you decide to read online!

He met you through Jimin. You were one of Jimin’s best friends, it seemed like he had known you for a long time.

So who were he to ruin Jimin’s image of you, and tell him that you were just so annoying. You were pretty yes, but it was something about your laugh. Something about the way you talked. It just rubbed Jin the wrong way. There are some people you just don’t click with, he thought to himself. As he looked at you from across the table. Some people are just not meant to be friends, and that’s ok. The only problem is that Jimin brought you with him no matter what. It was always “can y/n come?”. He asked Jimin once why he brought you around all the time.

“She just broke up with her boyfriend. Cut her some slack man.”

He had answered. But it had been eight months. Which, in his opinion, was more than enough time to heal from a breakup. But you still showed up. Every. Single. Time.

“What are you going to order, Jin?”

You asked him, looking back at him from across the table. You were slightly blushing for some reason. Everyone’s eyes turned to him, waiting for his response. In all honesty, he had been too busy thinking about you, to even read the menu.

“I don’t know yet.”

He answered in a stern voice.

“I really like the lobster here, it’s really good.”

Jin almost rolled his eyes at your comment.

“Really? Well I guess I’ll order that!”

He said with an overly excited tone. Not being able to control the sarcasm in his voice. Thankfully the waiter came before you could answer him. Everyone started saying their order, before it was his turn.

“I’ll have the salmon.”

He said and looked briefly over at you. To see if you’d have a reaction. You looked puzzled down at the menu for a second.

“I’ll have the salmon as well.”

“Wait! Jin, wait for me!”

You yelled after him, trying to run in your high heels. He had finally been able to leave. And thankfully he was able to mostly converse with Namjoon during the dinner. He had almost made it into the taxi, but you caught him. He couldn’t just shut the door in your face. He’s not directly mean to you, at least he tries not to be directly mean to you. But god, you were so annoying! Why couldn’t you just take a hint and leave him alone?

“What?”

You were a little out of breath, and needed a moment to catch your breath before talking.

“I was just- I live on the way to your place. Maybe we could, you know, share a taxi?”

He mentally cursed himself for not shutting the door in your face. Cause now he had to actually be alone with you for at least 10 minutes.

“Oh come on, I’ll pay for myself don’t worry.”

You said when you saw him hesitating.

“Fine.”

He simply answered and jumped in the backseat. Not caring to find an excuse.

“So, did you have fun tonight?”

You asked him once the taxi started moving. He sighed. Now he had to small talk with you as well.

“Yeah it was alright.”

He shrugged. He could see in his peripheral view that you were looking at him.

“The salmon was so good! You were so right about that one.”

You tried again, once he didn’t take the conversation further.

“I didn’t say anything to you about it. You just copied me.”

You laughed, thinking that he was just joking.

“You’re so funny!”

You said in between laughs, and even went as far as leaning over him in a fit of laughter. He sat completely still. Not engaging with you what so ever. Once you realised, you sat back up.

“We should go out for dinner more together. I think it would-“

“Please y/n! Just shut the fuck up!”

He suddenly bursted out. He didn’t mean to. It just came out.

“You don’t have to talk all the time. You’re so annoying!”

He looked at you, your smile was no where to be seen. And for some reason he missed it already.

“I’m sorry.”

He quickly mumbled, hoping that your lips would turn at least a little bit upwards. But they didn’t. You looked away from him, turning your face completely towards the window. Your entire body was trying the get the furtherest away from him as possible, and it hurt him for some reason. He sighed. Your place was coming up, he would probably feel better once you left the car. Out of sight, out of mind.

“I talk so much because I like you, Jin.”

You said, barley above a whisper. He looked back at you. The taxi stopped, signalising for you to get out.

“I really liked you.”

You gave him a last devastating look before opening the door and stepping out. You shut the door in his face before he could answer. It didn’t matter, he was left speechless. And he did in fact not feel any better now that you left the car. He felt even worse.

“Liked” you said you “liked him”. As in past tense. As in you didn’t like him anymore. He was laying in bed, staring up at the ceiling. He couldn’t sleep, and when he can’t sleep he starts thinking. It had been a week since the incident in the taxi. The incident where you said you “liked” him. Whatever that meant.

He would give you an apology next weekend. Pull you aside before you sit down at the table. Explain that he was just tired, that he didn’t mean it. In the moment he meant it, but he didn’t mean to say it out loud. He was amazed by the fact that he actually felt sorry for you. He didn’t like you, so why was he so obsessed with getting you to like him? Maybe he liked you more than he thought? Nah. He told himself before rolling over and closing his eyes. Trying to think of something or anything else.

Friday came around eventually, and he was ready to meet the boys (and you) at a restaurant. He walked in, a little earlier than usual. He had to pull you aside before you sat down, just so it didn’t get awkward.

“You’re early today, what’s up bro?”

Jimin lit up once he saw Jin approaching the table. He sat down beside Jimin, briefly looking at the empty seat next to him.

“Where’s y/n?”

He asked once he realised it was only the two of them. You always arrived with Jimin. He always picked you up, even if it was a longer route. Jin felt weird just thinking about it. What if Jimin had feelings for you? Why would he go to such lengths if he didn’t? The feeling in his chest couldn’t be described as anything but jealousy.

“She’s not feeling well.”

He simply commented.

“Why?”

He asked with a smug face, slightly poking him in the side with his elbow. Jin rolled his eyes, leaning away from him.

“She’s always with you, it’s not weird that I’m asking.”

He scolded his younger friend. Jimin stopped, but giggled slightly at his defensiveness.

“Whatever you say man.”

Jimin said, before changing the topic. Jin wondered if you truly was sick, or if you just didn’t want to face him. You didn’t strike him as a cowardly person. You would probably show up if you could. So the only explanation to why you wouldn’t show up to hear his apology, must be that you were sick of course.

But two weeks after that, you didn’t show. Two months passed and still no sign of you. Jin wanted to ask Jimin, but he didn’t want Jimin to think he actually cared. But he did care. He wanted to apologise for being a dick, that’s all. His conscience needed to be cleared for him to move on. At least that’s what he told himself. The first weekend after the two month mark, (not that he kept track of the time or anything), the boys went to watch a football game. It was weird that you didn’t show, considering that you loved football. You wouldn’t miss out. So Jin decided to ask again.

“Is y/n still sick? Did she fucking break her leg or something?”

He asked Jimin once they had found their places.

“I don’t know man. I asked her if she wanted to come, she said she was going with someone else.”

He said and shrugged. Someone else? Why was he hurt that you would rather go with someone else?

“Ok, I’ll go get a beer. Anyone want one?”

Namjoon was the only one who raised a hand, small excuses of work in the morning was heard from the others. He squeezed out of the row of seats. He needed to clear his head, he had to stop this obsession he had with you. After the game he would call you, and if you didn’t pick up he would go to your house. Enough was enough, he had to see you.

“Jin?”

Your voice made him turn around. There you were, two beers in hand and the familiar blue shirt of your favourite team. Your hair was in a ponytail, so he could clearly see your entire face. And you were smiling. Smiling at him like what happened two months and a week ago was ancient history.

“Y/n? What are you doing here?”

He mentally face palmed himself for asking something so obvious. You looked down at your shirt and back up at him.

“The same reason you are, I suppose.”

He laughed awkwardly, before you both went quiet.

“Look, y/n. I just wanted to ap-“

“Hey, babe. I’ll hold these for you.”

A man’s voice interrupted him. He looked at the man who approached you take your beers. You looked at him as well before looking back to Jin.

“I’m sorry, this is my boyfriend Hoseok.”

Jin was left speechless at your choose of words to describe the man. You had a boyfriend now?! The feeling of jealousy started to spread through his chest again.

“This is Jin, Jimin’s friend.”

You told this Hoseok, when he didn’t answer. Jimin’s friend? That was it? He was offended by the fact that you didn’t view him as more. You had a crush on him for gods sake!

“I’d shake your hand man, but you know.”

He raised the beers in his hand awkwardly. Jin still kept quiet. Not wanting to utter a simple word to the man you dared calling your boyfriend.

“I’ll catch up with you, just go back to the seats, ok?”

You told your boyfriend, and he happily complied walking away from the uncomfortable situation.

“Why are you acting so strange?”

He shook his head.

“I don’t know. I just- I thought you had a crush on me. But now you have a boyfriend, so.”

You smiled at him.

“I liked you, yeah. But after you rejected me in that taxi, I moved on. It’s not that deep, some people just don’t click.”

His stomach turned into knots, he hated the way you sounded like him. He hated the way you spoke about him. That it wasn’t that deep? Well, it was really deep to him. Extremely deep actually.

“I’m sorry, y/n. I really am. I should’ve never said those things to you.”

He managed to apologise, regardless of the burning anger he felt inside. How dared you reject him? He rejected you first.

“Jin, it’s ok. Seriously. It’s all in the past.”

You patted his shoulder before taking a step away from him.

“Tell the boys I said hi.”

You said before walking away. This was not how this was going to end. He had spent two months and a week thinking about exactly how you would respond, and what would happen after. You were not supposed to be so nonchalant and run away to your new boyfriend. You were supposed to accept his apology and run into his arms. Maybe even give him a kiss and a blowjob for his effort to be so empathetic. He was going to make things right.

He couldn’t sleep again. How could he after you basically dumped him? So he started thinking. Why would you do such a thing? Why would you hurt him? He knows that he hurt you, but he apologised. So you should stop whatever prank you got going on and come back to the group. Come back to him. He really didn’t know why he felt this need for you. Before all this he literally couldn’t stand you. But now it’s like he yearned for you. And it was baffling to him that you didn’t feel the same.

Maybe you were just using that Hoseok guy to make him jealous. Yeah, that’s it. This was your payback. He laughed at the thought and sat up in his bed. Turning on the lamp on his nightstand. Might as well pay you a visit.

He payed the taxi driver before closing the door carefully. It was the middle of the night, not a soul to see in your neighbourhood. He looked up at your apartment building, he knew you lived on the seconds floor. The light in your living room was on. He quickly looked down at his phone. 02:38 am. You should’ve been asleep already.

He walked over to the other side of the road to get a better view of your living room. Trying to get a glimpse of you in your natural habitat. And to his surprise you were there. Completely naked. He felt a familiar feeling in his groin once he saw what was going on behind those walls. You were on the sofa on top of your new boyfriends dick. Your back was turned towards the window, giving Jin a perfect view of your ass bouncing up and down. Jin ripped his eyes away from you to check if anyone else was seeing this. But no lights were on, and no bystanders. What a freak you were, having sex right in front of a window where anyone could see.

Or maybe you were doing it for him? The curtains were slightly open, just enough open for him to see you. Maybe you didn’t shut them completely, for him? Maybe you hoped he would show up after the two of you met the same day? It was working for him. Mesmerised by the way your body moved in pleasure, he slid his hand into his pyjama bottoms. He couldn’t help himself. You looked so good, and you were so perfectly placed that he could see the dick going in and out of you. His only wish was hearing you. He wanted to hear you moan so bad. Suddenly you slowed down. Jin’s hand moved faster, trying to reach release before the show was over. Just one last bounce before you sank down beside him. Now facing the window. He continued, now seeing your heaving naked chest sprawled out on the sofa. He was close, very close. And once he saw you get up and walk towards the window completely naked, body glistening, tits slightly bouncing, he couldn’t help but feel a euphoric release.

Reality hit him immediately after. In the time it took for him to ride out his orgasm, you had made it to the window. Now staring directly at him. He quickly pulled his hand out of his trousers, turning around to face the wall immediately. The sticky wet spot that made the fabric of his pyjamas stick to his skin, was a shameful reminder. He didn’t know if you had seen him. He didn’t know if you were calling the police, or still looking at him. But he stood completely still, awaiting his destiny. After a few minutes he pulled his phone up from his pocket, calling for a taxi back to his place.

It wasn’t until he heard the taxi pull up he dared turning around. His eyes flickered up to the window. No sight of you, no sight of nothing. The curtains were shut completely this time.

It was Saturday, Jimin had invited the boys to his house for a few drinks and some food. Jin hadn’t gotten drunk in some time and quite frankly needed it to forget whatever madness happened the weekend before. So he gladly accept once Jimin proposed the idea in the group chat. Something he would regret.

“Can you get the door? I can’t let this burn man.”

Jimin asked and pointed to whatever he was making on the stove. Jin, being the first to show up that night was more than happy to welcome one of his mates, and walked over to the door.

“Jin! It’s so nice to see you again.”

You said and gave him a small hug as you stepped into Jimin’s apartment. He was left speechless. By you, but also by the man that followed you inside. You brought your boyfriend?

“Hey man!”

Hoseok said and stretched out his hand for him to shake. Jin just stood there looking at his hand. He couldn’t move. Too terrified that this was your way of revenge. You were going to expose him as the creep that jerked off outside your house to all his friends. And on top of that you brought your boyfriend to rub it even more in his face.

“You know what, I’m a hugger anyways.”

Hoseok laughed and pulled him in to a tight hug once he didn’t shake his hand. Once he pulled away from the hug, Jin smiled at him. He couldn’t risk getting on the bad side of Hoseok either. Maybe you told him?

“Sorry, Hoseok right?”

He asked and took his hand in his. Your boyfriend chuckled and nodded. What a ray of fucking sunshine of a boyfriend you got. Not completely different to himself, he thought.

“Oh please, just call me Hobi!”

He smiled before walking past Jin and following you inside. Jin continued to stand by the door for a second as he heard both you and your boyfriend greet Jimin in the kitchen. He had to talk to you. He had to pull you aside before you got the chance to reveal his big dirty secret. The boys would think he was disgusting, a creep, a weirdo. What the hell was he doing here? He had to run away. Run far far away and never come back.

“Are you ok?”

He got ripped out of his thoughts and realised the tall figure standing in front of him.

“Ah, Namjoon. You scared me.”

He tried to play off. As if he wasn’t standing in front of the open entrance door just staring out into the hallway.

“I’m ok yeah, but what about you? What have you been up to?”

He said and threw his arm around Namjoon’s shoulders, leading him into the apartment.

“Woah, ok. It’s only been a week since we last saw each other.”

An hour had passed. You still hadn’t said anything. Not even mentioned that night. He had taken a few shots out of agony and suspense. He couldn’t get drunk. No, not while you were a ticking bomb ready to ruin his image forever. He had to stay sober so he could defend himself whenever the situation arose. Or if he was lucky enough to get you alone so he could convince you, hell maybe even beg for you not to say anything. He would do anything for you. For you not to say anything, of course.

“I have to go to the bathroom.”

You announced, slightly intoxicated. You were so cute, your face a little red and your words a little slow.

“I have to go to the bathroom too!”

Jin quickly said, getting up quickly. The room got quiet. He realised he had said that a little loud and with a little too much excitement.

“Ok.”

You shrugged, walking away from the table. Everyone started talking again, meaning he was in the clear. He stumbled after you.

“After you, princess.”

You said as you proudly held the bathroom door open for him. He would’ve smiled at your joke if this wasn’t a serious situation.

“I’m sorry, but I have to go first.”

You mumbled and started unbuttoning your trousers. He nodded. He didn’t even have to pee.

“Y/n, I’m so sorry. I didn’t-“

“I’m not drunk enough to pee while you’re watching me.”

He panicked at your words and didn’t know what to do with himself.

“Oh- uh. Do you want me to leave?”

You laughed.

“No silly. Just turn around.”

He did as instructed.

“I’m sorry, ok? I should’ve never done that! Please, just don’t tell the others y/n. I won’t recover from it.”

He started pleading, still facing the door. You went quiet for a few seconds. He gulped, anxious of what you would answer.

“What the hell are you talking about?”

You said and flushed the toilet. He turned around knowing you were finished. You were struggling with the button of your jeans, but looking at him with a confused look.

“Are you playing with me? Please if you are, don’t, I can’t handle that right now.”

You started washing your hands.

“No, Jin. I have no idea what you’re talking about. Is this about that time in the taxi again? Cause I told you it’s ok.”

“No. I mean- uh. Yes?”

He didn’t know what to say. Did you really mean it? Had you not seen him that night? A wave of relief washed over him. If you were telling the truth he was the luckiest man alive.

“What?”

“It’s about last weekend.”

He tested, seeing if you would remember.

“And?”

You asked puzzled. He let out a breath of relief. You were completely clueless.

“I didn’t mean to be so awkward with your- ehhh, Hobi.”

He managed to get out, not wanting to call him your boyfriend out loud. Now that he wasn’t caught and labelled a total pervert, he still had a chance to win you back.

“My Hobi, huh? You’re cute Jin.”

You said as you unlocked the door.

“You’re forgiven by the way.”

You closed the door behind you, and he quickly locked it. He had never felt more relieved in his entire life. Maybe you weren’t looking at him, maybe you were just looking around to see if anyone saw? And maybe he was fortunate enough to be well enough hidden that night to not get caught. Well, he knew he would be more careful the next time. He shook his head, baffled by his own words. The next time? He thought as he flushed the toilet. He didn’t understand what he felt towards you, but he wanted there to be a next time. He wanted the next time to be him underneath you, not your stupid boyfriend. He unlocked the door and started walking down the hallway. He didn’t want to admit it to himself before, but maybe he actually liked you. Like, liked liked you. He sat back down at the table. Taking another shot now that he could actually get drunk.

“Ooo, where are you going?”

Jimin asked you. Jin hadn’t heard the first part of the conversation, but pretended he had been here the entire time.

“This very fancy spa hotel. He said it was an early birthday present.”

You said and looked lovingly at your boyfriend.

“Wow, you’re lucky! You must really love her, Hobi!”

“You’re leaving?”

Jin asked you, ignoring Jimin’s hilarious comment, and quite honestly he didn’t want to hear Hobi’s answer to that. You nodded.

“Yeah, next Friday.”

He took another shot, drowning the jealousy that was starting to bubble inside him.

“I just don’t know what to do with the cats. I’ve asked a bunch of people, but everyone’s busy.”

“I’ll watch them!”

Jin blurted out, almost too excited.

“Are you sure? I’ll pay you if you want to-“

“No, no need to pay me. Don’t have anything happening next weekend anyways.”

“Weren’t you going out of town to see your parents next weekend?”

Namjoon asked with confused brows. Jin mentally cursed him for almost ruining his plan.

“No, that’s the weekend after. I’m completely free next weekend, ready to watch some cats.”

You smiled at him, he had missed that smile so much. To ever think that he didn’t like your smile was insane. What was even more insane was the fact that he blindly said yes to watch your cats, just to be in your house. But he’ll happily feed those little fuckers if it meant that he had full access to your home.

“Again, thank you so much. You’re a life saver!”

You yelled out the window of your car as you and your boyfriend drove away. He waved goodbye as he watched the car slowly disappear in the horizon. Once you were gone he hurried into your apartment, ready to snoop around. He only did it to get to know you more of course. He wanted to know every single little thing about you that only your home could reveal. He sat down on the sofa on the exact spot where he saw you have sex. He felt the soft fabric between his fingers, thinking of that night. He slowly laid down face first, wanting to be close to the spot where you sat completely naked. He rubbed his cheek on it, slightly smelling hints of your perfume. He could stay like that forever. Just frolicking in your scent.

But one of your cats jumped up beside his face, ruining the moment. He got up, annoyed at the grey fluffy animal. He silently pushed the cat off, but when it once again jumped up beside him he decided to look around somewhere else.

He found the bathroom, opening up the cupboard next to the mirror. Some makeup, some skin care, tweezers, tampons. Nothing exciting. He opened the door to your shower, nothing but numerous soaps. He looked over at the bin for a second and wondered if he was willing to go that low. Once he saw your dirty laundry he decided against it. He opened the lid and started digging, a mixture of your perfume and your natural scent hit him. He had never been happier. He suddenly stopped and pulled out a singular thong. It was baby pink with lace. He imagined how good you would look in it. He stuffed it in his hoodie, deciding to venture off to your bedroom.

He immediately opened the nightstand, hoping for something good. And you delivered. Toys of all kinds in different flashy colours. He smiled as he picked up the hot pink dildo. He wondered if you ever thought of him while using it. The thought alone making his pants feel tighter. He walked back to the sofa, he knew what he wanted to do now.

Jin was watching tv in your house once he heard the door open. He knew you would be arriving that day, so he managed to be on his best behaviour and not jerk off in every room of your apartment that day. Small things to make you happy. He quickly got up to welcome you.

“You got home quite late, I was starting to worry.”

No he wasn’t, he knew exactly at what time you would be home. He found a copy of your reservation at the hotel and calculated the time it took for you to get here. But he wanted you to know that he cared.

“No need, I’m home.”

You gave him a forced smile. Something was wrong. A feeling of excitement rushed through him. You came home alone, did this mean that-? Did you really break up with Hobi? He held back a smile.

“Here let me help you.”

He said and reached for your suitcase. Your grip tightened.

“No it’s fine.”

You simply said and rolled it into your apartment. He headed you sigh. He wanted to wait a little longer to see if you would break. Hoping that you would tell him the good news and not let the suspense kill him.

“Can we talk?”

You asked and looked back at him, removing your coat. He nodded understandingly as he took your coat before you could protest and hung it up. You walked over to the kitchen table and sat down. Putting your head in your hands.

“Do you want something to drink? I can make you-“

“No, Jin. Please just sit down.”

You were visibly upset, so he followed up on your request. Sitting down opposite of you. You took a few seconds before you started talking.

“Do you care to explain why you did what you did while I was gone?”

You asked and looked up at him. He froze. This was not the good news he was expecting. This wasn’t happening. How could you know?

“What are you talking about?”

He said and tried to laugh it off. You shook your head.

“So you’re telling me you have no idea what I’m talking about?”

You asked strictly. He gulped.

“No, y/n. I’ve just been watching your cats. Did I do something wrong?”

You let out another sigh before you pulled up your phone. You touched the screen a few times before your turned it around, showing him exactly what you were talking about. He watched in horror as he saw himself in your bed with his hand around his dick. The other hand was holding your underwear under his nose.

“There are many more of these videos.”

You said as you retracted your phone.

“I don’t need to see them.”

He quickly answered as you put your phone back in your pocket.

“Fine, but I want to know why, Jin.”

His mind was racing. How the fuck was he supposed to dig himself out of this one? You had physical proof now. He couldn’t deny it anymore.

“I didn’t know I was being filmed.”

He muttered as a poor excuse.

“Me neither. I set those cameras up when I didn’t think I would find someone to watch the cats. Unfortunately for you I forgot to take them down.”

He went silent again, slipping his hands into his deep pockets. Feeling around, trying to come up with a solution.

“Please tell me you have a logical explanation for all this. Why did you masturbate every single day with my stuff while I was gone?”

You seemed more upset that you couldn’t make any sense out of it, compared to what he actually did. Maybe if he just confessed you would forgive him.

“I like you, y/n. No, I actually think I love you. I’m in love with you.”

He blurted out. You were taken aback at his sudden honesty.

“I don’t understand why, I used to hate you. I never liked you. But ever since the incident in the taxi I haven’t been able to take my mind off you.”

He reached for your hand over the table, but you quickly pulled away.

“I love you, y/n!”

“So why didn’t you tell me? Why did you do this instead? You realise how fucking crazy you sound right now, right?”

You snapped back at him. Coughing slightly afterwards at your sudden outburst.

“Let me make you a cup of tea, it’ll help with that cough.”

He said calmly. You shook your head.

“I don’t want tea, I want you to leave my house right now!”

“Please, can we just talk about this like adults? I don’t want to fight with you.”

You stopped, wanting to hear what he had to say.

“Let me put the kettle on, and I’ll tell you everything. Just please, I care about you.”

You touched your throat as you slowly nodded. He quickly got up and started the kettle.

“I did it because I didn’t want to ruin your relationship. I saw how happy you were with Hobi. I thought this was my only way to be close to you.”

He tried his best to get you to feel sorry for him. He knew you would be much better off with him than that excuse of a boyfriend you had. He just wanted to pull on your heartstrings. Even if it was completely a lie.

“I just- sorry. I’m sorry. But I’m crazy about you, y/n. I’ve never felt like this before. I didn’t know what to do.”

You looked down at the table as he prepared your tea.

“Do you want sugar and milk?”

He asked carefully.

“Just sugar.”

You answered after a few beats of silence. You were clearly fighting some sort of mental battle. But it was alright, he was going to make that decision for you.

“I really care about you. I’ve been nothing but a dick to you, I know. But I want to make it up to you.”

He placed the tea on the table before you. You stirred it a couple of times as you waited for the tea to get ready.

“It’s just really uncomfortable, Jin. Yes I used to have a crush on you but that doesn’t give you the right to do such things.”

You scolded him as you brought the cup to your mouth slightly blowing at the hot beverage.

“Again, I’m sorry.”

He said and bowed his head in fake defeat. This wasn’t his loss. Sooner than later you would be his.

“I don’t know if I can forgive you. I need time to think about all this. It’s all too much for me right now.”

You took a sip, feeling the sweet warm drink soothe your sore throat. You immediately took another big sip to get the feeling back.

“I get it. I’ll give you all the time you need when we get to your new home.”

He said bluntly. You crossed your eyebrows at his comment.

“My new home?”

He nodded.

“You’ll love it there. Just you and me. We can spend as much time as you’d want to heal all the shitty things I’ve done to you.”

You shook your head.

“What? What are you talking about?”

You felt your sight getting blurry, your body suddenly felt really heavy.

“What- what have you done to me?”

You slurred as you fell back in your chair. Tears forming in the corners of your eyes as you felt yourself loosing control of your body.

“It’s ok, baby.”

Jin got up from his chair and walked over to you. In your last efforts you slung yourself off the chair and onto the floor, trying to crawl away from him.

“I’m sorry, but I had to do this. I’m sure you’ll forgive me once you realise what an amazing life we’ll have together.”

He bowed down and grabbed you. Making you look at him. Finally you would be his and his only.

“Fuck you.”

You managed to say before the drugs made you close your eyes and fall limp in his arms. You looked beautiful, he thought. Like sleeping beauty just waiting for him to save you. It would probably take some time for you to forgive him, but like he said, he would give you all the time you needed. And eventually you would realise that you were made for each other. He would make sure of that.

——————————————————————————

Thank you for reading! Do you want to read more?

Masterlist

[itstheghostofmypast]

Thanatophobia

Idol Choi Jongho x (F)Reader

Summary: How long does it take one to actually give up on you? How long does it take the other to realise that love is more than just an act of receiving, where bottled-up fears and insecurities may be enough to pull someone away from you, especially the someone Jongho had begun to take for granted.

Genre: Hurt/Comfort

Word Count: 2.4k

Est. Read Time: 20 min

Warnings: Strong language, thanatophobia (fear of losing someone you love)

Rating: PG-13

Networks: @cromernet @k-labels

Choi Jongho was anything but heartless, he was arrogant at times, he was stubborn most of the time, he was emotionally clueless sometimes, he was sarcastic most of the time, he was petty at times and he was straightforward most of the time, but what he was not, and he quotes, was a ‘heartless moron’. Now, he wasn’t one to fight, in fact, they’d barely ever get into a fight, usually because she would be compromising or choosing to accept defeat, but tonight was not one of those nights where he was given this privilege, where she would easily accept defeat and brush off his sarcasm, no, it just escalated into something ugly and gruesome.

It all started when he came home early for once, the dorm was empty too, or so he thought, for the moment he had flopped down on his bed, face forward, someone had jumped on him, scaring the daylights out of him.

“Boo!” “HOLY SHHHH- what are you doing here?” he whined, rolling over when she rolled off him, both of them lying on their backs, staring at the ceiling, well, he had his eyes closed, she turned her head to look at him with a pout, scooting closer, wrapping her arms around his arm as she pressed her cheek smush against his shoulder, enjoying the warmth of her baby bear, “I had the spare key, Wooyoung gave it to me last time I came over but you were out, so he was like I should have it, gave me his saying he’d get another one and-” Cracking open an eye he scoffed, “You sure talk a lot to Wooyoung huh?” turning his head to meet her gaze, she had stopped her monologue, to stare at him in utter shock, “What? I’m not wrong, I didn’t even know about the key thing- Sitting up she glared at him, “That’s because you weren’t home, Jong.” The tension between them was getting thicker, he was tired physically, but she was tired mentally, “You haven’t been responding to my texts or answering my calls, so I doubt you’d know- “I have a job, you know?” he scoffed, following suit, as she sat on his bed on her knees, frowning at him, and he sat at the edge of the bed, both in a heated stare off, he was actually waiting for her to avert her gaze, or mumble an apology or whine cutely to end the fight, so he’d feel like he’d won like he had control, some form of dominance, “I can’t just respond to your every whim.” That was probably what set it off, because the next thing he knew she got off the bed and snatched her phone off the side table, slamming the bedroom door shut when she marched out of the room, her tantrum just set the whole forest on fire as he marched behind her, slamming the closed door open and calling out, “Yah? Are you in your senses? Why are you being like this!?” reaching out to grip her wrist he turned her around, ignoring how she was trying to pull away, “What is your problem? Are you mad about the Wooyoung thing? Cause I’m right about that! You’re my girlfriend, not his!” by now he was yelling, furious, frustrated, fed up, but at what? At his hectic schedule or her? Or perhaps he was upset over how he was unable to spend time with her and the time he had been given was ruined by his own pride. “Y-You think I don’t know that?” she yelled back, snatching her wrist out of his grip, “I know you’re busy too, but the least you can do is leave me on read, can’t you? You don’t even open my texts! I can’t magically guess your schedule!” He should have stopped there, he should have, he had realised that he was in the wrong, but was he willing to accept it so easily? No. Why? Because he was jealous, he was upset and more importantly this was the first time she had ever ignored him, ever chosen to show how his nonchalant attitude had upset her, this was not what he expected, he just thought they’d go on for ten minutes and she’d probably change the topic, not list down why he’s a bad boyfriend. “Doesn’t mean you get all cosy with Wooyoung.” “I-” she stared at him standing in the hallway for a good minute before taking off her ring and throwing it at him, the clink of the gold ring hitting the ground resonated within the silence, before her words cut through it, “You’re a heartless moron.”

That was three hours ago, three hours ago when he had let her walk away like she didn’t even matter to him, instead, he stood there watching the ring on the tiles, the ring she had gotten for them on their first anniversary, it wasn’t a promise ring, but more of a ‘just know when we’re far apart across the world, you’ll always have a piece of me and I’ll have a piece of you’ kind of ring- why’d she throw it at him, shouldn’t she have taken it with her and asked him to give the one he was wearing back to her?

“I love how that’s the only thing you’re worried about.” Wooyoung sighed, climbing up the stairs, his phone sandwiched between his ear and his shoulder as he carried two bags full of groceries up the quiet staircase, “You’re a real idiot you know, she did come over three times last week, the poor thing sat outside the apartment for an hour the third time and that’s when I gave her my key…Hongjoong told me that was the right thing to do too.”

“I- I was busy.” The youngest huffed, staring at the gold band, twirling it around in his fingers, “It’s not like she told me, I was too busy to read her texts, so she should’ve understood-”

“Understood what? That you’re a shitty boyfriend?” Wooyoung stopped at a step, the step that led to their floor, someone was sitting on the floor next to the door to the hallway (Yes Woooyoung had used the fire exit to come upstairs, San had told him this was a great way to work out- he’d kill the bastard for that tomorrow), hugging their knees, head resting against the wall, puffy eyes closed- was she asleep?

“What? Why!?”

“Jongho, did you even call to make sure she reached home safe?”

“Well… I…no.”

“I’m amazed you found someone who loves your useless a**.” With that Wooyoung hung up, sighing as he walked over to her, placing the grocery bags on the floor to crouch down and gently shake her shoulder, “Excuse me miss, but are you in your senses- how are both of you this dumb?”

.

Jongho slammed the front door open, not even bothering to put on his mask as he hastily made his way out of the apartment, only to bump into a smaller form, hearing a familiar yelp he instinctively reached for her, wrapped his arms around her to pull her closer, pressing her against him. He let out a breath of relief, at the realisation that it was in fact her, she was too tired to pull away or even push him away, and that was why she just stood there, letting him wrap his arms around her, resting her forehead against his chest, too drained even to protest. He looked behind her to spot Wooyoung standing there, grocery bags in hand with the most disapproving look he could muster, “Found her on the staircase, poor thing cried herself to sleep there- then there’s you, a bastard with an ego as big as the sun-”

“H-her phone was powered off.” He quickly defended himself, pulling her even closer as he tightened his arms around her, not wanting her to escape. The moment Wooyoung hung up on him, he realised how bad he had f*cked up, Wooyoung was never one to leave a conversation hanging, that is until he completely gave up on the person, and if Wooyoung had given up on him, did this mean his patient, compassionate, honeybee had done the same? Though his question was answered with a loud sniff, causing him to look away from Wooyoung and look down at her, only to meet her teary gaze, his gut twisted at the way she asked the dreaded question with her voice trembling, as if it was being thrown around by her pestering insecurities, insecurities that he had brought to life, that he had helped manifest within her, by constantly pushing her to the sidelines, by ignoring her beckoning calls, by looking right through her even though she stood right in front of him, with a warm smile and a heart of gold- one he was not worthy to call his own; “D-do you not love me, anymore?”

It was this very question that had him look up at Wooyoung in panic, a cry for help, though the fox-like man shrugged and walked past them, mumbling, loud enough for him to hear, because he knew the girl crying in the younger man’s arms was sobbing so loud, the floodgates of all that pain and anxiety that was slowly drowning her had now enveloped her completely, leaving her a mess, a mess he was supposed to fix, so she couldn’t hear him, she didn’t hear him, when he side-eyed the youngest, and walked past them, “You f*cked up, fix it yourself,” slamming the main door shut behind him, finally leaving the two alone in the corridor.

An eternity later the two were sitting on the same staircase where Wooyoung had found her, the two were staring at the window ahead, she thought she was tired before, but all that crying just amazed her, at this point, she felt like she’d faint if he pushed any wrong buttons. Though they had been sitting quietly for the past hour, he had not uttered a word, which meant he wasn’t going to be the first to break the tormenting silence, as usual, it would be her, to kneel and-

“I’m sorry.”

Her eyes widened at the foreign choice of words, slowly turned her head to stare at him with shock through her puffy, swollen, eyes, licking her dry lips before speaking. Still, he cut her off again, this time turning to face her, the determination in his eyes somewhat scaring her, she’d only ever seen that look when he was going to sing a song that wasn’t the easiest when it came to the number of high notes, perhaps he was going to sing a perfect melody that was just for them, in tune with their pent up love for each other- for his locked up love for her, a symphony she wouldn’t mind hearing over and over again.

“I- I don’t deserve your forgiveness, but you need to understand I did not doubt your loyalties or misjudge your character, I was only self-projecting my insecurities, I know you’d never do such a thing, I know you love me and I- I” he paused, watching how her breath hitched, eyes widening in expectation, biting her lower lip unsure of how he felt about her, “I love you so much it turns me stupid- it scares me how much I want to be around you, I- I want to be vulnerable around you and…what if you don’t like it? You don’t like me when I’m not my at my strongest or my best…and I- I guess what I’m trying to say is,” he reached in his pocket to pluck out the ring, showing it to her, “Could you please find it in you…to give me another chance- you don’t have to say yes right away, I won’t force you, I could never…just…let me drop you home this time…yeah?”

She stared at him quietly, blinking slowly as his words processed before letting out a sigh, scooting closer as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders, burying her face in his neck as she placed a soft kiss against his warm skin, sighing when she felt him pull her closer, gripping him tighter when she heard him sniff, feel his body trembling against hers, letting him finally let it all out against her, but never looking up, her face buried in the crook of his neck, mumbling sweet positive affirmations or kissing the skin as she let him have his moment, only to feel him slowly push her away, looking down at her with puffy eyes that matched hers, and a nose pinker than hers, “Please…stay.”

“I wasn’t going anywhere, you dummy.” Sighing she pulled off him, taking the ring from him but he didn’t let her, instead, he slipped it back on her finger, “I was waiting for you to come and give this to me…if I wanted to leave you for good, I would’ve told you to give me the ring you’re wearing back.”

Letting out a dry chuckle he shook his head, he was an idiot, one who couldn’t read situations as well as he boasted that he could- he guessed he was clueless when it came to love, at least he had someone as patient as her to help him pull through his minefield, frolicking through it like it was a field of daisies.

“Thank you…” he sighed and pressed his forehead against hers, before leaning closer to capture her lips in a kiss, only to realise how long it had been since he had kissed her, making him pull her closer, cupping her face as he tried to make up for lost time.

Finally pulling back she smiled at him out of breath, watching how he took in equally deep breaths, his cheeks all puffed out and pink, “I’m out of practice.”

“Don’t worry, we’ve got all night.” She smiled.

“I prefer taking things to the bedroom, not a voyeurism guy.”

“Choi Jongho.”

“I love you” he chuckled, watching her shake her head in defeat as he pulled her up to her feet, laughing when she whined at how he was speed walking to the apartment, mumbling, “Do you want me to carry you? Because I will, for as long as you want, honeybee.” And that’s what Wooyoung saw before Jongho closed his bedroom door, carrying her half-asleep form in his arms, bridal style as he mouthed a thank you to Wooyoung before going to finally cuddle up next to her like she had originally planned for the night.

Taglist: @edenesth @yessa-vie @mlysalt @the-kpop-simp @spooo00oky

[meowlod]

furina x fem!reader | making macarons in a messy kitchen.

warnings: a little suggestive and teasing sentence at the end, not much. A lot of fluff and teasing.

“S—stop! Hey! Stop it—”

You kept throwing flour into Furinas face when you both are supposed to make macarons, but that woman kept teasing you by calling you a bad baker and by pinching your cheeks, so you decided to give her a taste of her own.

”Furina, this wouldn‘t have happened if you didn‘t annoy me.“ You reply back with a frown, grabbing a egg from the table before throwing it in her face, getting back a gasp from the woman. You laugh at the view of Furinas messy state, and you run around the kitchen countertop as Furina tries to chase you with a egg in her hand.

”Come back here, you— fuck!“

She falls down on the ground with a grunt because you poured down water onto the ground. You chuckle at the curse word she shouted out and you give her your hand to help her up, only to end up on the slippery ground as well after she pulled your arm down firmly. She tackles you down and with the egg in her hand she shoves it firmly into your face, all the stickiness ruining your perfect face. ”Furina…!“

”Ugh, it‘s all your fault! Apologize, now!“

Furina grips your hair, waiting for the apology to come out from your mouth, only to get replied back with a stupid chuckle! You pin her down the ground, sitting on top of her lap before giving her a unexpected kiss that makes her face red. Pushing you away, she‘s the one pinning you to the ground now with a grin, taking your face into her hands before giving you a messy kiss back.

”Hehe, someone like you can‘t overpower me, my dear~“

How cute. You sigh and smile, kissing her back with passion. You never expected all of this mess to turn out like this. ”Haha, yeah, I can‘t. But I still can cook better macarons, while you can only cook macaroni—”

Her face turns red from embarrassed and she quickly shushes you with both of her gloved hands, making you grin. ”Tch, shhh sh sh! No-. well— shut up! not really— Ugh, stop teasing me all the time, seriously! i‘m going to turn into a tomato..“

”You already are, little miss tomato.“

You laugh at her pouty face, giving her a playful slap on the shoulder as you give her another kiss to calm her down, and it seems to work. Her face turns back to normal and she kisses you back. The door seems to open and you guys didn‘t hear the sound, until the deep voice makes both of you jump and red.

”You both really are like love birds, I must say. Also, isn‘t the kitchen a big mess? It would be delightful if you guys clean it up.“

There stands Neuvillette, with a slight smile and a bag of groceries for you both. You chuckle nervously and Furina stands up from your lap, taking the groceries from Neuvillette’s hands before pulling you up and running out of the messy kitchen. ”That man did not have my permission to come in so sudden…!“

Your red face slightly turns back to normal, yet still red and you sigh in embarrassment, following her. She takes you to her bedroom and shuts the door before putting the bag of groceries on the table next to the bed then jumping on top of the bed with you, clinging on to you and burying her face into the crook of your neck like a clingy panda. You softly laugh at her.

”It‘s okay, we are alone now. Well, isn‘t this the perfect place for sexual intercou—”

”HEY! Shut. Up! Do not tease me again and d-don‘t say that! What is with you and teasing me?!“

She yells, putting the blankets over both of your bodies before closing her eyes. You sigh with a smile before doing the same, cuddling Furina back.

Well, you both hope that nobody will come in and disturb you, right?

Still, Neuvillette comes in one last time, putting two matching plushies for you both in the bed, looking one last time at you and Furina with a smile before closing the door and leaving the house.

At least, you both can be in peace now.

[leggerefiore]

Scotophobia

cw: fluff, chandelure ingo

Pitch black surrounded you as you held your knees to your chest. Your living room was impossible to navigate by sight after your power flickered and failed. Judging by the heavy storm that brewed outside of your apartment building, it was obvious what had happened. Despite the observation, you felt extremely nervous over the darkness. You had a bad fear of the darkness since you were a child. Something always felt like it was lurking out of your sight, just waiting to get you.

It did not help that your childhood neighbourhood often held a variety of ghost types that haunted children for a laugh (or over darker reasons). You knew that as an adult, you had nothing to fear, but the phobia from your youth never left you. It was part of the reason you enjoyed living in Nimbasa so much. A city known for its light would definitely be the place for you to be. Currently, however, the storm knocked out the city's power. You whimpered as you felt the worry about a Duskull appearing before you with its crimson eye piercing the void around it, signifying your end being near.

However, it was not a crimson light the broke your fears. A soft, flickering violet came to you instead as your boyfriend left the kitchen. His ghastly body glowed brilliantly in the darkness, providing a sudden and unexpected comfort. “Dearest…” his voice was controlled and gentle, “What is wrong? I can feel your fear through our bond…” You jumped to your feet, nearly tripping over the coffee table, and clung to Ingo tightly. His body held his inhuman warmth to it and beautiful, sweet light. While he may, too, be one of the ghost-types you so feared, you knew that Ingo would never harm you. The Chandelure hybrid was absolutely adamant that he never consume your life energy or dare touch yourself, putting aside the way his species bonded themselves to a human mate.

“I-it's dark…” you managed to get out, “I'm afraid of the dark…” He hummed as he gently embraced. The flame burning inside him suddenly grew brighter and bigger, his accent fires that spread from the affixed arms of his shoulders did much the same. The candle-like light flooded the room and provided much respite to your worried mind. He gave a slight laugh and pressed a kiss to your temple. “I suppose I am quite the perfect being for this situation,” he spoke clearly, “I do apologise about dinner, but the power ruined my stew.” You sighed. First darkness, now no dinner. Some things were just annoying to deal with, you accepted. At least you had your cute boyfriend to offer you company and support.

You both returned to the couch. You sat in his lap and buried your face into the nape of his neck. You cuddled him happily. Ingo's presence was a calming one. Despite his stiffness and loudness in public (likely from how humans judged Chandelure hybrids), his persona at home was a much more meek and relaxed home. He always sought to take care of you and make sure you felt loved, just as you did for him. Your fear of ghost-types always felt a bit ironic with how easily you got along with him. Chandelures themselves terrified you, too. Their ability to consume life force and hypnotise people was a scary thought to consider. Even legends about them being used to light homes in the past resorting in deaths commonly.

Truthfully, you shuddered a bit at the thought since you currently had one lighting your home, but you had the most subtle feeling that he was not out to end you. Especially judging by how distressed he became at the thought of not spending his future with you. You had no plans to leave him anyway. There was something so enjoyable about having the ghost help take care of your home. He was everything you wanted in a boyfriend. “You know,” you started, “I'm also afraid of ghosts.” He gave you an odd look as a hand rubbed at your back. Clearing his throat, “Is that so? How do you handle being at my side, then?”

You hummed and pulled away from his to look into those glowing yellow eyes. “You're sweet and loving, not soul-eating and haunting,” considering your words a bit more, you changed your mind, “Well, you're a bit haunting. Not too much. Do not enjoy you passing through our front door instead of opening it, though.” This time, he let out a genuine laugh. Your chest felt light at his reaction. Hearing him laugh was such a rare thing, yet you had heard it twice tonight alone. Perhaps the dark was not your enemy as much as you had thought. “Thank you, I do try to be more human in my actions and presentation rather than a creature that consumes the souls of others to thrive,” Ingo gave you a small smile, “Knowing that I make you think that way about me, however… That makes everything feel better, my love. I do worry that I come short in our relationship often… That maybe a human would be a better choice for you.”

You shook your head and pecked a kiss to his cheek. No human could make you as happy as him, neither could any other being. You loved Ingo, not anyone else. Nuzzling your nose to his, you grinned back at him. “I love you, hubby,” you called him the pet name you often teased him with, “I want you. You're the best choice for me.” His flames burned even brighter from his embarrassment. Shaking his head, you giggled when a kiss was pressed to your lips. Your foreheads rested together for a moment.

“I love you, too, dearest,” he replied, “Ah, we should probably call Elesa and see if she's alright. Emmet, too. He's working tonight.”

Before you even realised it, your fears were completely gone.

Ingo had burned them away.

[alipal97]

Lifeline Part V

Part I Part II Part III Part IV

Pairing: Bradley “Rooster” Bradshaw x reader

Warnings: angst, fluff, kissing, mentions of death, angst angst angst, happy ending(or is there?🤔)

It had been weeks, weeks without speaking to Bradley. He made it a very clear point to avoid you and you weren’t exactly going out of your way to see him. The day you broke it off, you returned home to find all of Bradley’s stuff gone and his key sitting on the table. You had cried so much that night, you had to wear sunglasses to work the next day.

You still saw Bradley since he was still apart of Top Gun and still training to be reserve for the next assignment. You would occasionally catch him staring at you but as soon as you looked in his direction he quickly looked away, barely catching a glimpse of his chocolate brown eyes. You missed him but having inherited your father’s stubborn nature you refused to say it.

To say the least, you had been pretty distracted lately and it was getting on Hangman’s nerves. During a flying exercise, you almost clipped one of his wings with your own when you caught sight of a picture of you and Bradley in your cockpit. It was from before the two of you had started dating, back when things were much simpler. You were on Roosters back, both dressed in your flight gear, smiling and laughing at each other rather than the camera. Tears had started to sting your eyes before Hangman’s voice began yelling at you over the headset.

“What the hell was that, Mitchell?” Seresin snatched the helmet off his head as he stalked after you.

The moment you had climbed out of the cockpit you made a beeline for the locker rooms, not wanting anyone to see you cry. You weren’t necessarily sad but you were angry. Angry that you let yourself ruin your friendship with the one person who has always been there for you. You had swallowed your feelings for years but just that one look with his puppy dog, brown eyes you were gone.

“Hey, I said what the hell-“ he stopped short as he pulled on your arm to turn you around, taking in the state of you. You wiped furiously at the tears that dared to fall down your cheeks, trying your best to avoid Hangman’s gaze. “Hey, what’s wrong?”

You shrugged him off, looking around to make sure no one was watching. “Don’t act like you care, Seresin. I don’t need your pity.”

“Look, inside the cockpit we’re a team. Your the pilot and I’m your wingman, but outside of that I’m your friend who wants to know if you’re okay.” Jake said sincerely. When you didn’t answer he put his arms around you, pulling you in for a hug. “Does the reason your so distracted have anything to do with Rooster being such a dick, lately?”

You couldn’t help it anymore, you let it loose and let the tears fall. You wrapped your arms around Jake and buried your face in his chest as sobs wracked your body. It took him by surprise but he was quick to respond, pulling you closer and rubbing soothing circles on your back.

After a few moments, Jake pulled back slightly to look down at you. “Come on. You look like you could use a drink. Go get changed and I’ll meet you outside.”

The two of you went your separate ways to get changed. Instead of changing in the locker room, you walked to your room where you had been staying on base. After the night Rooster moved out and you found his key you had been staying on base, not wanting to stay at the house alone. Bradley had stayed with you for months and without him the house just felt cold and empty.

You walked in and began to unzip your flight suit, shrugging it off, leaving you in a black tshirt and underwear. You walked over to your closet to find something to wear, but became aware of someone sitting in the corner of the room. You whipped around, jumping slightly at the sight of Rooster sitting in the leather chair in the corner of the room. He wasn’t looking at you, he was leaning forward with his arms resting on his knees, hands clasped tightly together as he stared at the ground.

“What the fuck, Rooster?” You yelled, attempting to grab something to cover yourself. It’s nothing he hadn’t already seen before but that didn’t make it any less awkward.

“So you and Bagman huh? Gotta say, I did not see that one coming.” He finally looked up at you, anguish and betrayal written all over his face.

“What are you talking about?” Did he seriously think you were into Jake? You and Hangman were nothing more than friends, you had more of a sibling bond with him than anything.

“I saw you two out on the tarmac. You two looked pretty fucking close for just friends.” He spat out.

“No, stop. First of all there is nothing happening between me and Hangman but if there was you have absolutely no right to be jealous of it. You made your choice when you decided you didn’t want me making you miserable for the rest of your life.”

“That’s not what I meant and you know it.” Rooster shouted in frustration.

“But we both know it’s what you truly meant to say.” You said pulling on your pants and slinging a jacket over your shoulders. You didn’t give him a chance to respond before you walked out to meet Jake who was already sitting in his truck. You climbed up and slammed the door after you, crossing your arms and looking out the window.

“I see Bradshaw came to see you.” Jake said as he pulled away, noting that had to be the reason for your sour mood.

“Just drive.”

________________________

After he dropped you back off at base, a little tipsy and red in the face but seemingly in a better mood, Jake made his way to Rooster’s. He parked his truck in the drive before getting out and making his way up to knock on the door. Rooster opened the door before quickly trying to shut it when he saw Hangman on the other side. Jake put a foot in between the doorframe and the door, using his hand to push it open further. Rooster looked annoyed but he didn’t stop him.

“We need to have a talk.” Jake said as he pushed through the rest of the way.

“What in the hell do we have to talk about?” Bradley looked confused as he made his way to the kitchen.

“Look, I know you’re scared for y/n, we all are. A solo mission without a wingman is incredibly dangerous, but you and I both know if anyone can do it it’s Ghost.” Jake said leaning against the counter. He truly meant what he said. As much as you two butted heads, he really did think you were the one who could complete the mission and come back safely.

“I’m not scared for her. I just don’t think she’s the right pilot for the job.” Rooster shrugged, taking a swig of his beer.

Jake rolled his eyes. “Now do you really believe that?” He raised his eyebrows waiting for an answer.

Rooster sighed and his shoulders sagged. “No, I don’t. She’s the best fucking pilot we’ve got.” He ran a hand down his face. “It’s just-I almost lost her nine months ago, man. I can’t go through that again.”

“You don’t think she knows that? She’s been beating herself up about it since she got the assignment.” Hangman yelled, getting frustrated with the sandy blonde before him. “Which, by the way, Cyclone didn’t give her a choice in taking. Y/n is going to be fine but not if she has this bullshit to distract her.”

Rooster’s head shot up. “What do you mean?”

Hangman sighed. “I mean, she nearly took my wing off today because she couldn’t see through her fucking tears, Rooster.”

“Fuck.” Rooster groaned, head falling into his hands as he leaned against the counter. “I fucked up.”

Jake clapped a hand on his back on his way to the fridge to snag a beer. “Finally something we can both agree on.”

“I have to do something.” Rooster said suddenly. He didn’t know what he was planning to do since the girl wouldn’t hardly look at him, but he needed you to know that he still loved you.

“Woah now, hang on.” Jake said stepping in front of him.

“Hangman, I swear to God if you don’t step out of my way—.” Rooster bit out through clenched teeth.

“Yeah yeah. You can finish your empty threats later but right now you need to listen.” Jake said rolling his eyes. “We’ve all got a big day tomorrow, especially y/n. Let her get some sleep and you can talk to her after. We don’t want to jeopardize the assignment all because she’s falling asleep in the cockpit.”

Rooster sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. As much as he hated to say it, Hangman was right. He didn’t want you getting distracted up there.

It was a long sleepless night for Rooster after Jake left. He berated himself for trying to take away the one thing that you truly loved for. Of course you could fly the mission no problem, you were the best damn pilot he knew, he was just scared. Last time had been a close call and it nearly destroyed him, he didn’t know if he could handle the real thing.

Morning came and as soon as the sun had risen Rooster was out the door and on his way to Top Gun. He drove faster than normal nearly earning himself a few speeding tickets. He slammed the Bronco into park the second he flew into a parking space, exiting the vehicle before sprinting to the locker rooms.

Rooster flew through the door, his eyes searching for you immediately. He was met with an empty room meaning you had to already be on the tarmac. He hit the lockers in frustration on his way out, sprinting as fast as he could in an attempt to catch you before take off.

——————————————

You walked, helmet in hand, towards your aircraft perfectly in step with Hangman. You lifted your eyes from their staring at the tarmac beneath you to see Jake looking around.

“What the hell are you looking for?” You asked trying to follow his wandering gaze.

“What?” Jake said with a smirk, finally looking at you. “A guy can’t try and seek out some beautiful ladies to celebrate our victory with later?”

You rolled your eyes at him but continued walking. You were almost to your aircraft when you heard your name being called from behind you. You stopped and turned to find the source.

Mav jogged the rest of the distance between you, holding out the locket your mother had given you before she passed. “You forgot this sweetie.” Your dad looped the chain over your head and tucked the locket in your flight suit right next to your heart.

“Thanks, dad.” You smiled at him, but it didn’t quite reach your eyes.

“Be careful up there, okay?” Mav said pulling you in for a tight hug.

“I will. Jake’s got my back.”

“We’ll go on them before I hold you down and refuse to let you leave.” He said with a chuckle, pushing you in the direction of your jet.

“Y/n!”

This voice stopped you dead in your tracks and before you could even think to turn around, someone had gripped you by the shoulders and was spinning you around. The first thing you see is whiskey brown eyes staring into yours.

“Bradley what the he—“ You hadn’t even gotten the words out before his lips smashed against yours, his strong hands cradling your face.

Just as fast as it happened the kiss ended leaving your lips tingling and your head spinning.

“I was wrong.” Bradley whispered as he leaned his forehead against yours.

“I—“

“Stop.” Bradley interrupted whatever rejection you were about to throw his way. “Let me finish please and then if you still want to kick me, punch me, whatever I don’t care.”

You sighed and nodded, closing your eyes and relaxing slightly in his grip.

“I was wrong to tell you to not take the mission and I sure as hell was wrong for being mad when you did. It was stupid and selfish of me even if I thought I was protecting you. I’ve never seen you more alive than when you’re in the air and I don’t want to take that away from you. You’re the best fucking pilot I know, y/n. I’m so fucking scared to lose you and—“

“Bradley.” You stopped his ranting, gripping his face and forcing his eyes to meet yours. “Please just kiss me.”

Bradley’s lips twitched up at the corners . “Yes ma’am.”

Without hesitation Rooster’s lips met your own in a bruising and passionate kiss. His hands dropped to your waist pulling your body flush against his. A groan slipped past your lips and Bradley swallowed it with his own. A hundred years could’ve passed and neither of you would’ve have known, it was just you and Bradley. Until your father cleared his throat from behind you.

The two of you broke apart and you went to pull away before Bradley reeled you back in and touched his forehead to yours. “Come back to me in one piece, alright?”

You smiled and held up your finger for a pinky promise, something the two of you had done since you were kids. To you it was a promise that could never be broken. Bradley smiled and linked his pinky with yours before bending down to kiss his thumb as you did the same.

“I promise.” You whispered before winking and walking away.

————————————————

“Base this is Ghost, target has been destroyed. Returning to base.”

The dagger squad cheered as your voice came over the radio, confirming your success. The hugged and high fived each other, proud of their fellow pilot.

“Well done, Ghost. Be sure to watch for any enemy aircrafts in the area and we’ll see you soon.” Warlock responded, sitting back in his chair.

“Copy that.”

It hadn’t been five minutes into your journey back when you saw an aircraft ahead. You assumed it was your wingman, not understanding why Jake had moved position.

“Hangman? What’s going on? Why are you out of position?” You spoke through your headset. The only response you received was a missile narrowly missing your wing. “Woah. Base we have a bogey dead ahead. Shots fired. Initiating evasive maneuvers.”

Bradley’s blood ran cold as the transmission from you came through. The room had gone quiet as they listened to the on going dog fight between you and the enemy. Bradley’s leg shook with anxiety as Phoenix rested a comforting hand on his shoulder.

“Oh shit! That was a close one. Hangman! I need you to my location. Now!” You shouted through your headset.

“I’m on my way, Ghost. Hang in there.” Jake responded already turned around and on his way to your coordinates.

Minutes ticked by as you attempted to lose the aircraft firing at you. Hangman was no longer of use as he was struck in the wing and had to eject. It was just you now and you were trying your damndest to keep your promise to Bradley.

In one last great attempt to take out your tail once and for all you pulled a few risky moves that, if pulled by someone without experience, could get them killed. Luckily for you, you’re a part of the world’s most elite.

From the ground all that could be seen was a giant explosion that enveloped both aircrafts. It was hard to tell who exploded and who would be making it home to their family and friends tonight.

“Ghost.” Warlock spoke through his headset. “Ghost do you copy.”

Mav closed his eyes and hung his head while Rooster was visibly shaking in his seat. The whole room was so dead silent you could’ve heard a mouse fart.

Warlock tried again. “Ghost, do you read me.”

Nothing but static and then, “Loud and clear, Dumbledore. Enemy is eliminated, heading back to base as we speak. Estimated touchdown in T minus thirty seconds.

Everyone flew out of their seats to run out to the tarmac but no one ran faster than Rooster. By the time he reached your jet, you were hopping out onto wing. Rooster reached up and helped you down before crushing you in a hug.

You pulled back to look up at his tear streaked face. “I kept my promise so what’s my prize?” You said with a cocky smirk.

Bradley smiled and shook his head in disbelief before planting a kiss on your lips. “I fucking love you.”

“I love you too.”

@melllinaa

———————————————

Only took me about 5 months to finally finish this but I’m back bitches! This is the official end to Lifeline but let me know if you guys want a bonus smut chapter(I promise it won’t take 5 months to write it)

Taglist:

@sswrecker

@itsmytimetoodream

@noz4a2

@shanimallina87

@maverick-wingman

[mimic-from-the-lab]

Blood and Ruin Chapter 4

Also found on Archive.

Summary:

Set on earth.

Ex futuristic-ish world, apocalyptic. Where the world was broken apart due to bio-flesh monsters, normal life fell apart and the population is scattered in far smaller towns and cities after a mass death. There are still scattered parts of old tech of the modern world as a way to fight back if it can be put back together.

–

Biohorror vampires for the disassembly drones and normal humans for workers.

— Chapter 1 — 

<Previous—–Next>

Chapter 4

Uzi had a mission, to get hold of the camera at home. One that was a part of her mother's things from back in the day. It's also basically the only one in the city.

Getting inside the colony was the easy part, back through the blast gates. She wasn’t the only one to the back already, but she didn’t find her father anywhere. She was worried that he would be at home but he shouldn’t be if he was already working in the morning. She just had to make sure no one saw her change, which always wasted time. But she needed to get back to the storage closet and change as fast as she could. No one was even around, at least no one that would care to report her behavior. Her continued strange behavior, a bit of a perk at already being seen as the weird teen.

She didn’t have a problem till she got to the front door of her place. Taking in a breath, make sure she didn’t show anything on her face and seemed unbothered. Opening the door and walking in. Khan stood in the middle of the room. ‘And where have you been?’ Khan asked and Uzi jumped. ‘Jesus,’ she exclaimed and Khan raised an eyebrow. ‘In fact, where have you been in the multiple weekends passed?’ he asked and Uzi looked about, trying not to make eye contact. ‘Sneaking out to make out with a boyfriend I totally have,’ she said quickly and Khan fell into hysterics before cutting it off. ‘But seriously,’ he said and Uzi sighed again, trying to come up with something. Her gun weight behind her gave her something. ‘Fine, I have been sneaking off into the mines. The one that's nice and abandoned that no one would go into,’ she said and Khan looked at the gun in a frown. ‘Uzi, you know how I feel about them,’ he started, Uzi groaned and went to walk past. ‘Yes, you have been very clear about it,’ she said and Khan turned, his hand coming up about to hold her shoulder but bailed at the last moment to rub at his face. ‘I just want you to be safe,’ he said and Uzi stopped at her door to look back. ‘And I can be,’ she hissed and turned, the two of them stared at one another. ‘Mom would have been alright with it.’ ‘Yes, if she was here, but she isn’t,’ he said, not able to look up but he did look over to the side of the room. To a framed family photo, an edge of it destroyed and obscured her face. Uzi hissed and turned into her room, she did not want to continue this conversation any longer. ‘You always pull that card,’ she hissed and closed the door behind her, ignoring his exclamation for her to come back. ‘It's such a cheap shot.’ She yelled out and she knew that he would leave after that.

She would grab the camera later, now she just needed to lay face first into her bed. At least for a moment but she needed to install the part she got, with a groan she rolled herself back over and got up. Going to the messy part of her room, a workshop shoved in it. The scene almost mimicked the one corner of the workshops that belonged to her father. Same mess with tools about, mugs left forgotten. The only difference was the plans that covered the walls, firearms of all types on hers as her fathers was covered in doors and structural plans.

Uzi brought the gun from the bed after she shuffled the backpack off her, she pushed other items on the table out of the way to make room.

The part didn’t fit perfectly, but at least there was enough of a connection for it to interact. She powered it on, watching for the start of it overheating, but nothing came or at least nothing was about to explode. She wanted to test it, fire it into a test target or some cans. Uzi hadn’t fully lied to her father earlier, she did go to the mines to test her guns just not that day. It was annoying to get to the abandoned mines though, going through the workshops to storage and then eventually to them. The middle of the night would also be perfect but she needed sleep for the morning. She had to trust it would both hold and fire when needed, it did everything to start and was ready for it. It shouldn’t explode, again. Hopefully. She went and grabbed the abandoned gun, she might as well pass the time taking it apart. With any luck, find more pieces to repurpose, maybe even get it working one day and she avoids scavenging for too much else. She just needed to remember to set up her alarm before she started.

Uzi awoke with her alarm, at her desk with a thin piece of metal falling off her face. She quickly silenced it, sat with her eyes closed for a moment. Knowing that something else should have happened. She expected a matching alarm to go off in her father's room, but it was silent. She had never tried both days, she wanted a day to rest before having to go back to school after all. A worry did cross her mind, what if her dad looked for her when he woke up? She shook herself off worrying about it now, she had a vampire to rush back to and all before he had the chance to wake up himself.

She left the mess she made of the gun she worked on as it was scattered on the desk. It had been a waste of time, most of it being destroyed by water damage. Since she never got ready for bed she was at least still dressed for the day and exited her room carefully. Sneaking out into the living room. Opening a closet attached to it that stored all the things that belonged to her mother, many boxes filled the shelves but she hadn’t ever gone here herself to look through it. There were other items about the camera being one that was between two boxes. Just tall enough that Uzi needed to go onto her toes to reach for it, as she pulled it out just jolted the boxes next to it.

The box tilted causing pages from inside to slide out. She swore as they floated down, she managed to take hold of the camera as they passed, she hugged it with one arm as the other tried to catch one in the air and managed to crumble one in her grip as the others reached the floor. She looked down on it in worry, scared that crushing it in her hand was destroying something important. She frowned in confusion at what she found.

Drawings, scribblings in black marker. A monster was the main focus of the page, a blob mess with multiple arm-like limbs that seemed to be dragging it along. Uzi stared at it, it was still a drawing looking back but the little eyes on it seemed like it was staring on its own. She looked away in a flinch. She did not want to look back down on it, she did see some of the others. A winged creature did take her notice first as she lowered down to try to collect them. Something that was attacking out, it had a mouth full of teeth. A claw out. Humanoid.

She should have spent more time on it, and she would have if she hadn’t heard her father's cough from within his room. She quickly brushed the pages back inside and rushed to close the door as quickly as she could, running for the front door. Getting out before he ever had the chance to get out of bed, maybe he heard her so she turned to rush away. Not looking back in fear, the camera still sat against her.

Uzi left with purpose in her step. Not letting anyone’s gaze make her slow down. She made it outside in record time, the only stop was the front gates. She kept her hand on where she had hidden the camera in a belt pocket as she thought. To the drawings, to her mother, and what secrets that closet was likely filled with. Only the grating from the gates brought her back and moved out, pushing past slower members. Ignoring the calls of annoyance. She needed to be away already. She didn’t delay in going right back to the street she had left the vampire, she would have run back if she could.

Uzi found the building exactly where she had left it, looking up at it, thankful that it was still in place. That it hadn’t just disappeared in the night. She dumped her backpack by the entrance, leaving her gun on her back, and readied both her torch and the camera in her hands. She took a breath before heading into the building’s dark.

-----

<Previous—–Next>

[runawaymun]

It must be a state thing because I never get in trouble for doodling on the side of my paper/work

One of my teachers even gave it a little smiley face when grading it.

And I can't think that someone would get in trouble for fidgeting unless they were disrupting the whole class.

It also depends on the teachers and principle. My teachers are really cool

My english teacher for her 9th grade class she set up the classroom like a court room with a place for the prosecutor, defendant and witness to sit because ger class was reading romeo and juliet and they were going to have a mock trial about.

My one teacher brought in hot chocolate for us to drink.

Yeah! These are all experiences I find common among students who go to brick and mortar schools and I’m not saying this isn’t how classes work. What I’m getting at is the “kids can fidget/stim so long as they aren’t disrupting the whole class”

When you’re homeschooled there is no class to disrupt. Wanna roll around on the floor because it makes your brain happy? Totally fine! Want to break out the paint and finger paint (well into high school when classes no longer become interdisciplinary) while we go over chemistry? Awesome whatever helps you focus! Want to hurl a bouncy ball against the opposite wall while I read to you or wriggle around on the couch/rock/sway? That’s fine. Rock and sway as hard as you want. Having trouble memorizing your time tables? Let’s do jumping jacks or run in circles while we sing them or just yell them repeatedly out loud. I’m not talking about chiller forms of fidgeting or stimming. I’m talking about the distracting ones.

I’m not saying that you can’t do this in school or that certain teachers don’t set up environments where this can happen occasionally or make concessions, but it just isn’t practical in a class of 20-40 kids because it’s distracting to other students. And there is a huge difference between being able to do this some of the time (being given opportunities to do the distracting stims) and being able to do this constantly.

And there’s the aspect of being able to eat, get up and take breaks whenever you need to, go to the bathroom without having to ask, bring stuffies/plushies/squishies, weighted blankets, have your headphones in listening to music or other stimuli while listening to a lecture, etc. etc. again things which just aren’t generally allowed in class environments, especially with older kids).

And also…yeah it varies on how cool your teachers are. But I grew up during the 90s and early 2000s where neurodivergence (especially autism and adhd) were not well understood. Wiggly kids were overwhelmingly disruptive/bad kids and the general consensus was that it if you were zoning out in the direction of the window (rather than watching your teacher), doodling a lot (rather than taking notes or watching your teacher), wiggling a lot…you’re not paying attention. Full eye contact = engagement & teachers tended to get really snippy with kids who weren’t facing toward the front or had their head down a lot. Fidget toys got confiscated because teachers didn’t think it was possible for kids to use them without being distracted by them. I’m old enough to remember when allowing kids to fidget or use toys in class was a hot topic in the news and a subject of debate and research. Kids were expected to participate verbally at least once in every single class, which for someone who doesn’t naturally speak up and has social anxiety was torture to the point of ruining my ability to focus.

[wouldntyou-liketoknow]

Incorrect Quotes: ISWM (Parts 1 and 2) Edition

Engineer Mark: *speaking into a walkie-talkie* Engine to Cap, Engine to Cap! Testing! Testing!

Engineer Mark: Testing, testing, testing, testing, testing, testing, testing!

Engineer Mark: TESTING! AAAAUUUUGGH! TEST, TEST! DO YOU READ?!

Captain: *smiling* Cap to Engine, I read you loud and clear

___

Celci: So, what, now we’re just supposed to do anything that the Captain does? I mean, what if they jumped off a cliff? Engineer Mark: If the Captain were to jump off a cliff, they would’ve done their due diligence regarding the height of the cliff, the depth of the water, and the angle of entry, so yes. If you see the Captain jump off a cliff, by all means, jump off a cliff. Celci: You jump off a cliff! Engineer Mark: Gladly. Provided the Captain does first.

___

Wug: So, Friend Gunther challenged Wug to a sparring match. Wug agreed, because Wug was curious about human combat. Things went pretty good at first, but then Friend Mark walked in looking for something, and. . .Wug accidentally punched him in the face.

Wug: And while Wug was trying to help Friend Mark up, Wug couldn’t decide whether to say, “WUG’S SO FUCKING SORRY, HUMAN!” Or “HUMAN, ARE YOU OKAY?”

Wug: So. . .Wug just panicked and yelled, “ARE YOU FUCKING SORRY, HUMAN?!”

___

Engineer Mark: It’s a white flag, Mack. And you might as well start waving it—

Mack: THE ONLY THING I WILL BE WAVING IS YOUR DECAPITATED HEAD ON A STICK IN FRONT OF YOUR WEEPING MOTHER!

___

Gunther: Whoa, careful there, buddy. You’re making this whole fight-to-the-death thing a little homoerotic. . .

Gunther: Then again, that might just be me. This happens so often it’s hard to tell

___

Engineer Mark: Hey, wanna bang?

Engineer Mark: HANG! I meant hang! Damn autocorrect. . .

Captain: . . .Mark, this is a verbal conversation

___

Captain: We all learn from our mistakes 

Celci: Then Mark should be a genius by now. . .

___

Engineer Mark, Celci, Gunther, and Mack: *arguing very loudly and very aggressively. No one can tell what they’re even fighting over, least of all any of them*

Burt: *stares at them, expression completely blank. His eyes twitch, one after the other*

Burt: *takes a deep breath, then slams his arm on the table everyone is sitting at* WE ARE IN A GODDAMN IHOP! ACT LIKE IT!!!

___

Celci: Mack isn’t exactly a team player

Captain: What do you mean?

Celci: Just earlier, he told me that I was the only other person on this ship with any functioning braincells. Then he asked me to “come lead a magnificent revolution” with him because “we could take over command of the Invincible II, and eventually the universe at large.”

Captain: . . .Oh. Well, what did you say to that?

Celci: I accepted, of course. Which reminds me that I should be going—

___

Allu: You often use humor to deflect trauma

Engineer Mark: Thank you

Allu: That’s. . .not a good thing—

Engineer Mark: All I’m hearing is that you think I’m funny

___

Engineer Mark: Don’t worry, I know exactly what I’m doing. Everything is gonna be fine!

Captain: How can you still say that?!

Engineer Mark: Because sometimes, when things get tough, D E N I A L is all we have.

___

Wug: Wug doesn’t think Wug can be on the same ship as the human who ruined Wug’s life

Captain: *on their knees, sobbing* FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, I’M SORRY, I DON’T KNOW WHY I DIDN’T WANT THE DONUTS, PLEASE FORGIVE ME—

___

Mack: Finally! With control over the Invincible II, the ultimate power is mine!

Mack: PERFECT TAX EVASION

___

Captain: Gunther, we’ve been over this. Violence isn’t the answer.

Gunther: Y’know what, Cap? You’re right. . .

Captain: *sighs in relief* Thank you.

Gunther: Violence is the QUESTION. 

Captain: Wait, what?

Gunther: *now running away* AND THE ANSWER IS ALWAYS YES!

Captain: GUNTHER NO—!

___

Mack: It would be nice to change the world, y’know?

Captain: For the better?

Mack: . . .

Captain: Mack, please answer me

___

Wug: YOU HEAR WUG, YOU BASTARD?! WUG’LL CUT OFF YOUR NUTSACK AND NAIL IT TO WUG’S DOOR! LIKE ONE OF THOSE. . .LION DOOR-KNOCKERS RICH FOLKS GOT! THAT WILL BE YOUR BALLS!

___

Gunther: *drunk as hell* H-HEY GUYS, LET’S PLAY SPIN THE BOTTLE!

Celci: DID YOU DRINK THAT ENTIRE BOTTLE OF WHISKEY?!

Gunther: OKAY, I’LL GO FIRST—

___

Engineer Mark: *high off his tits on spacedust* Drink water, get plenty of sleep, go mad in space, talk to the dead, take your meds, don’t talk to cops.

___

Captain: So, did everyone learn their lesson?

Engineer Mark: No.

Wug: Wug did not

Burt: I may have actually forgotten one.

Gunther: Also no.

Captain: Oh, good, neither did I.

Allu: *exhausted sigh*

___

Captain: Well, you know what they say—when life gives you lemons. . .

Engineer Mark: Put them in a facemask 

Celci: Use them as a battery

Gunther: Throw them at people

Mack: Squirt the juice into life’s eyes. Steal life’s wallet and assume its identity. Now you ARE life. You hold dominion over all. Your enemies cower at your feet.

Captain: . . .make lemonade. The answer was to make lemonade, guys.

___

Bandit: Wug was banned from the intergalactic chicken shack, so we had to go into the wormhole to get some.

Wug: Well, they shouldn’t say “all you can eat” if they don’t mean it!

Bandit: Wug, you ate a chair. . .

___

Engineer Mark: I hate when people say “Are you even listening to me?”

Engineer Mark: That’s such a weird way to start a conversation.

___

[At Chef Rexx’s restaurant]

Burt: *walks up to the counter* Do you serve coffee here?

Cashier Rexx: *nods* Sure do.

Burt: Okay. Can I get a venti vanilla latte with. . .uhhhh. . .

Burt: . . .seven shots of espresso?

Cashier Rexx: *blinks* Jesus Christ, just do cocaine—!

___

Mack: You know what else is not stealing? Putting an extra bike lock on a stranger’s bike.

Mack: It’s insane that bike locks are legal. You have any idea the amount of power that you wield. . .with your imagination and a bike lock? There are so many things—like, you could just walk past a Baskin Robins and be like “You’re closed!”

___

Engineer Mark: Hey, did you know that “thot” means “thoughtful person?”

Allu: Really? I didn’t know this Earth slang

[Later, on the Invincible II]

Allu: Thanks so much for giving me a tour of your ship, Captain. You’re such a thot.

Captain: *wheezing* I’m a WHAT—

___

Engineer Mark: Do you ever get a feeling where you look at someone and your heart skips a beat?

Burt: That’s called arrhythmia.

Engineer Mark: *not really paying attention* I get that feeling every time I look at the Captain—

Burt: *starts dragging Engineer Mark to MedBay* It’s a serious condition that you can die from

___

Captain: Life gets so much better when you accept yourself for the weird little bitch that you are.

___

Mack: The Captain made me care about stupid things.

Engineer Mark: Like what?

Mack: Friends. Humanity. My mental health.

Captain: Don’t forget the morals!

Mack: *lets out a long-suffering sigh* And morals.

___

Bandit: The path to peace begins with four simple words.

Bandit: Not. My. Fucking. Problem.

___

Engineer Mark: Allu didn’t know that “cowboy” is a word, so, they called them “horse-pirates” and I’ve been laughing about it for an hour.

___

Captain: *guiding the Invincible II crew on an expedition around the new planet*

Tyler: Psst. Hey, Gunther. I missed something. Can I see your notes?

Gunther: Sure thing. Here ya go.

Tyler: Thanks.

Tyler: *looks at the notebook*

Tyler: . . .This is the Hamburglar being torn apart by bears. . .

Gunther: I’m thinking of doing a graphic novel so I can shop it around to Hollywood studios.

Tyler: The Hamburglar being torn apart by bears, Gunther.

Gunther: Yeah, I’m not really sure what you were expecting from my notes.

___

Engineer Mark: I almost drowned in the sink.

Celci: I’m sorry, what?

Mack: Imagine that headline. “Head Engineer of Invincible II Drowns in Sink.”

Burt: How do you even drown in a sink?

Engineer Mark: Well, I filled the sink and put my face in it. And then my head got stuck under the faucet.

Captain: Mark, what the actual fuck—

___

Gunther: Why the fuck do I NEED to come out?! If you really think I’M straight, then that’s on you!

___

Engineer Mark: FOUR MONTHS!

Captain: What’s with him?

Mack: *suppressing his giggles* It’s nothing, really—

Engineer Mark: THAT’S HOW LONG YOU STOOD BY AND WATCHED ME WATER A FAKE PLANT!

___

Engineer Mark: *pointing* Is this seat taken?

Captain: . . .That’s my lap.

Engineer Mark: With all due respect, that doesn’t answer my question, Captain.

___

Mack: *dripping with sarcasm* Oh, I’m sorry! Why don’t we just relax and turn on the radio? Would you like AHM or FHMMMMMMMM?!

___

Bandit: *slightly raising her voice to be heard down the aisle* What chip brand do you want?

Wug: *yelling back at full volume* WUG’S ALWAYS A SLUT FOR COOL RANCH DORITOS

___

Engineer Mark: Can we agree to not tell anyone about this?

Bandit: This isn’t even the most disappointing thing I know about you so far

___

Captain: I just want someone to take me out.

Burt: . . .Like, on a date or with a sniper?

Captain: *thinking of Mark and Mack* I’m open to surprises.

___

Allu: It’s kind of hot out to be wearing all black.

Captain: *obviously uncomfortable* I look awesome

Allu: *genuinely concerned* You look pallid and sick.

Captain: *sweating profusely* Yeah, sick as fuck—

___

Mack: Before you judge someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you judge them, you’ll be a mile away from them and will also have their shoes. And they probably won’t be able to do anything about it.

___

Allu: Hey, Captain? Can you please give me some. . .dating advice?

Captain: Look, just because I’m in a relationship with several members of my crew doesn’t mean I know how I did it.

___

Bandit: Alright, Wug, Today was a good day, but now it’s time for some shuteye.

Wug: *holding up an adorable, fluffy plushie* Mr. Snuffles says Wug can stay up as long as Wug wants, and that Friend Bandit needs to die!

Bandit: *staring at the plushie* . . .What the heck, Mr. Snuffles?

___

Ms. Whitacare: There are seven chairs and ten kids. What do you do?

Engineer Mark: Have everyone stand.

Burt: Bring in three more chairs.

Mack: Choose the best seven and let them sit down.

Gunther: Kill three.

___

Engineer Mark: Y’know, sometimes I don’t think you take me seriously.

Bandit: Really? There are times you think I do?

___

Celci: Hey, toss me my keys.

Engineer Mark: *chucks a printer at Celci*

Celci: I said keys!

Engineer Mark: I thought you said printer.

Celci: Why the FUCK would I say PRINTER?

___

Captain: I come from a long line of people who had something wrong with them.

___

Gunther: It’s got everything I like! Gratuitous violence. . .

Gunther: . . .

Captain: Oh, I thought you were listing things.

Gunther: I was. I’m done now.

___

Allu: Where’s your Head Engineer?

Captain: Oh, Mark? He’s just doing stuff.

Allu: I don’t like the sound of that. Where’s your Cryogenics Officer?

Captain: Trying to stop Mark from doing the stuff.

Allu: And your ADS Officer?

Captain: Trying to stop Celci from stopping Mark from doing the stuff.

Allu: I see. And what are you doing here, Captain?

Captain: I’m supposed to stop you from stopping Gunther from stopping Celci from stopping Mark form doing the stuff.

___

Engineer Mark: Dude, I just read an article that said swearing can make you live longer.

Gunther: I! SHALL BE! IMORTAAAAAAAAALLLL!!!!

___

Mack: Hello? Engineer Mark: Hey, what’s up? Mack: I need your help. Can you come here? Engineer Mark: Eh, I can’t, I’m buying clothes. Mack: Alright, well, hurry up and get over here Engineer Mark: I can’t find ‘em. Mack: . . .Whaddaya mean you can’t find ‘em? Engineer Mark: I can’t find ‘em, there’s only soup. Mack: Whadaya mean there’s only soup? Engineer: It means there’s only soup! Mack: Well then, get OUT of the SOUP AISEL! Engineer Mark: ALRIGHT, you don’t have to SHOUT AT ME! […] Engineer Mark: There’s more soup! Mack: Whaddaya mean there’s more soup?! Engineer Mark: There’s just more soup! Mack: Go into the next aisle! […] Engineer Mark: There’s still soup! Mack: Where are you right now?! Engineer Mark: I’m at soup! Mack: WHADDAYA MEAN YOU’RE “AT SOUP?” Engineer Mark: I MEAN I’M AT SOUP! Mack: WHAT STORE ARE YOU IN?! Engineer Mark: I’M AT THE SOUP STORE!! Mack: WHY’RE YOU BUYING CLOTHES AT THE SOUP STORE?!?!?!? Engineer Mark: FUCK YOU!!!!

___

Allu: No, I’m not tired of being nice. Yes, I still wanna go apeshit. These things can coexist, stop asking me.

Allu: I wanna go apeshit, but like, in a kind and respectful way.

___

Burt: Now, guys, stop arguing or we’ll turn this ship around!

Captain: *grabbing the controls* SHUT UP OR I’LL STEER THIS SHIP INTO A FUCKING ASTEROID FIELD

Engineer Mark and Mack: *screaming*

___

Captain: Hey, what time is it?

Engineer Mark: *shrugs* I don’t know. Hand me my trumpet.

Captain: *raises an eyebrow, then takes Mark’s childhood trumpet out of his closet and gives it to him*

Engineer Mark: Thank you. *starts playing the trumpet very loudly and very poorly*

Celci: *yelling from across the ship* WHO THE FUCK IS PLAYING A TRUMPET AT FOUR IN THE MORNING?!?!?

Engineer Mark: It’s four in the morning.

___

Gunther: So far this year, I have realized that I am—1. Out of control, and 2. Even bi-er than I thought I was.

___

Engineer Mark: Am I in trouble?

Celci: Take a guess.

Engineer Mark: . . .No?

Celci: Take another guess

___

Captain: *completely deadpan* Stop forgiving my crimes. I worked hard on those.

___

Engineer Mark: He’s touching me!

Mack: *pointing at Mark, holding his finger exactly one inch from Mark’s shoulder* I am not.

Engineer Mark: AH! You’re touching me!

Mack: *in a sing-song voice* Not touching~

Engineer Mark: TOUCHING. ME.

Mack: *rolls his eyes* It’s free air.

Engineer Mark: *grabs Mack’s hand and bites him*

Mack: *shrieking bloody murder* HE BIT ME! CAPTAIN, MARK’S BITING ME!

Captain: *not looking up from their work* Knock it off, you two. I’m busy.

Engineer Mark: HE STARTED IT

Captain: I don’t care who started it, I’LL FINISH IT.

___

Celci: Are you familiar with the gearshift?

Engineer Mark: You mean the prindle?

Celci: . . .The what?

Engineer Mark: The prindle!

Celci: For God’s sake—are you referring to the lever that say P-R-N-D-L?

Engineer Mark: I’m not a kid, Celci! I know how to spell prindle!

___

Celci: Some people just need a high-five.

Celci: . . .in the face. . .

Celci: . . .with a chair. . .

___

Engineer Mark: *carrying several supplies, obviously struggling*

Captain: *holds out their hands to help*

Engineer Mark: *aggressively moves all the supplies to one hand in order to hold hands with The Captain*

___

Engineer Mark: Why can’t you just see things from my perspective?!

Celci: *kneels down*

Mack: *sits on the floor*

Burt: *curls up into a ball*

Engineer Mark: Okay, listen here, you little shits—

___

Celci: Get out of my quarters, Mark.

Engineer Mark: *standing exactly one inch from the doorway* But I’m not even in your quarters.

Celci: I don’t care, get out of my quarters!

Engineer Mark: But I’m not IN your quarters!

Celci: Well you’re bothering me so GET OUT!

Engineer Mark: I’m just minding my own business!

Celci: Yeah, in MY quarters! Captain, Mark is in my quarters!

Captain: Mark, please head to your own quarters. 

Engineer Mark: I’M NOT EVEN IN HER FUCKING QUARTERS!

___

Gunther: Quick, I need $10,000 because I have ADHD and am bisexual

___

Burt: *takes a long, deep breath*

Burt: *whispers* “yup” as quietly as humanly possible*

___

Wug: Wug thinks Friend Mx. Allu might be mad at you and Friend Captain.

Engineer Mark: What makes you say that?

Wug: *typing on his communicator* Friend Mx. Allu seemed really busy when Wug went to report to them, and they asked Wug to relay a message to Friend Mark.

Engineer Mark: *leans forward to listen to the hologram recording*

Allu: *on the hologram* Greetings, Human. I hope this message finds you before I do. . .

___

Mack: My two reasons for doing things—1. Spite, and 2. The aesthetic. That’s it.

Mack: . . .Okay, I lied—3. Attention

___

Engineer Mark: They say lions throw their cubs off ravines and only raise the ones strong enough to climb back up. Well, firstly, that’s not true and completely irrelevant to the story, but it makes for a cool opening!

___

Bandit: I lost Wug for an entire weekend at the mall once.

Bandit: He was living in a boba shop. He was so happy there. . .

___

[The Captain is introducing the crew to Allu Minum]

Captain: This is Burt, short for Burton.

Captain: This is Celci, short for Celcionna.

Captain: This is Mack, short for Mackenzie.

Captain: And this is Mark. He’s just short.

Engineer Mark: *internally screaming*

Everyone Else: *struggling to contain their laughter*

___

Gunther: I did a little bit of spying on the Captain. Do you want me to spill the beans?

Burt: Why would you ever intentionally spill beans? They’re one of nature’s most densely packed protein sources, and they remain unsullied by flavor.

___

Captain: Sometimes I just wanna yeet myself out of the ship and taste some of that delicious, scrumptious space air

Engineer Mark: As I can recall, there is no space air?

Captain: Exactly

___

Engineer Mark: WHY AREN’T THERE ADULT-SIZED PLAYGROUNDS?!

Engineer Mark: Like, everything is the same as a kid’s playground, but bigger! Why don’t we have those?!

Burt: We do. They’re called theme parks.

Engineer Mark: But you have to PAY for theme parks!

Burt: That’s the adult part.

___

Engineer Mark: Do you think we went overboard with the party decorations?

Gunther: Nah, it’s cool

Celci: THE SHIP IS ON FIRE

Burt: Aesthetic

___

Engineer Mark: Hey, Mack? Where’s the Captain?

Mack: The Captain’s fine. . . *starts laughing maniacally*

Mack: Sorry, I just thought of something funny. *points at The Captain* They’re right here.

___

[Engineer Mark and Gunther are practice-sparring]

Gunter: *pulls yet another gun seemingly out of nowhere* Check this out, Markimoo!

Engineer Mark: GUNTHER!? WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!? YOU THINK YOU CAN HURT ME WITH THAT? WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO, GUNTHER? SHOOT ME?

[30 minutes later]

Celci, to Engineer Mark as his gunshot wounds are getting treated in MedBay: I’m really not sure what you were expecting to happen there.

___

Burt: Captain, what are you doing?

Captain: I’m confronting the person who ruined my life.

Burt: . . .

Burt: You’re yelling at a mirror, Captain. . .

___

Engineer Mark: Yes, I know you reassured me literally one hour ago, but I need reassurance once again.

___

[A typical conversation about The Captain]

Mack: —HOT! HOW ARE THEY SO FUCKING HOT?! AND RESPECTFUUUUUULLL?!?!?

Engineer Mark: *quietly snickering* Oh my God. . .

Mack: THERE’S SOMETHING WRONG WITH THEM.

___

Gunther: Captain, facts are like stars

Burt: Always in the sky, but you can’t always see them

Gunther: No, they’re like shining holes in the dark light of my ignorance. AND I DON’T LIKE ‘EM!

___

Captain: My life is a little too much panic and not enough disco.

Gunther: My life is a little too much fallout and not enough boy.

Celci: My life is a little too much chemical and not enough romance.

Burt: My life is a little too much imagination and not enough dragons

___

Wug: What’s the meaning of human life?

Captain: Mark.

Wug: Aww! Because Friend Mark is always by Friend Captain’s side?

Captain: No. Because life is short.

Wug: *bursts out laughing*

Engineer Mark, from the other room: I HEARD THAT

___

Engineer Mark: People who sleep with their phone on silent or DND really don’t give a fuck about anybody.

Celci and/or The Bandit: Look, if you decide to have a problem after midnight, that’s between you and God.

Captain: . . .

Burt: How do you set your phone to Dungeons and Dragons?

___

Engineer Mark: Allu won’t trace it back to us, don’t worry

Captain: Are you for real? They trace everything back to us! They’ve traced things we haven’t even done back to us!

___

Engineer Mark: This ship is an “uwu” free zone

Celci: For once, I agree with you, Mark. And anyone who goes “uwu” or “OwO” in response shall be imprisoned for their crimes against humanity

Mack: cwimes agwainst huwmanwity ^w^

Engineer Mark: *starting to tremble, tears now running down his face* I-I am going t-to break your fucking fingers. . !

Burt: bwoken bwones awe tempowawy. Bwut twauma-indwuced nightmwares can wast as wong as a wifetime uwu

Celci: *grits her teeth, trying to keep a pokerface* I won’t hesitate to kill you, bitches!

Captain: *begins crawling around on the ceiling* this mowtwal vessel is ownwy a shwell contwaining howwors the univwerse has newer sween OwO

Engineer Mark and Celci: *holding each other and screaming in absolute terror*

___

Gunther: *pulls a cigar out of his jacket*

Celci: *gives Gunther a disapproving look*

Gunther: *shrugs as he lights the cigar* I just like the feeling of something in my lungs.

Celci: . . .

Gunther: . . .

Celci: Have you tried breathing—

___

Captain: *being interviewed after going through a certain timeline* Am I intimidated by Mack? No. He can be a bit crazy at times, but—

Engineer Mark: *pokes his head through the door of The Captain’s quarters* Mack requested a meeting with you

Captain: *scrambling under their desk* oH SHIT—

___

Mack: Captain, you ignorant slut—

___

Celci: Whatever you’re thinking right now, stop.

Engineer Mark: What?

Celci: You always make that face when you’re about to say something stupid to piss me off. So do yourself a favor and cut it out alrea—

Engineer Mark: I wanted to apologize for all the animosity between us. I shouldn’t just resort to insulting you when you bring up ideas that are different than mine. I haven’t been respecting you like a good crew member should, so I can’t expect you to respect me, either. 

Celci: . . .

Engineer Mark: . . .

Celci: Mark, I—

Engineer Mark: Also, cereal qualifies as a soup

Celci: I FUCKING KNEW IT!!!

___

Celci: The Captain’s cryopod has been malfunctioning; they won’t be able to enter or stay in hibernation because of it. We can’t take off until it’s repaired.

Burt: So, what you’re proposing is that whomever helps the Captain stay asleep wins some kind of prize?

Celci: That’s not at all what I—

Mack: *bursts into the room, holding a cast iron frying pan* Where are they?

___

Captain: *on their communicator* Bandit! We need your help! I—

Bandit: *having been just woken up* Nuh-uh, Cap. Is your ship on fire?

Captain: . . .Well, no—

Bandit: Then it’s not a real emergency. *hangs up and goes back to sleep*

Celci: What did she say? She’s an expert on wormholes, isn’t she? Did she know what to do about a portal to some new dimension opening up in the commons room?

Captain: Apparently, this isn’t a real emergency.

Engineer Mark: *being strangled by some horrific alien creature* HOW THE FUCK IS THIS NOT A REAL EMERGENCY?!

___

Burt: Captain, you know Mark will never agree to this plan.

Captain: Sure he will

Celci: I’ve already asked him three times. His response was to blow raspberries and flip me off.

Captain: Well then, let me try

Captain: *walks into the next room, approaching Mark* Hey, Mark! Could you—

Engineer Mark: Y e s .

___

Burt: Change is inedible. Celci: Don't you mean inevitable? Burt: *spitting out coins* No, I did not.

___

Captain: I’m gonna need a human skull and I can't have you ask any questions why.

Bandit: Only if you also don't ask why Bandit: *pulls seven pristine human skulls out of her coat* Take your pick. Captain: . . . Bandit: . . . Captain: This one is fine

___

Captain: Gunther, I said you could bring one other crew member to this meeting. ONE.

Gunther: They’re good pals. They work well together.

Mack: *trying to strangle Engineer Mark in the background* WHAT THE HELL DID YOU SAY ABOUT PEEPACHU?!?! SAY IT AGAIN RIGHT NOW!!!! I DARE YOU!!!!!!!!

Captain: . . .

Gunther: . . .I mean, they’re entertaining, aren’t they?

___

Captain: Mark and I have the kind of easy chemistry where we finish each other’s— Engineer Mark: Sentences? Captain: Don't interrupt me.

___

Mack: Hey, Captain! Trick or Yeet?

Captain: *confused and not really paying attention* “Yeet?”

Mack: Yeet it is!

Mack: *tosses The Captain into the dungeon*

___

Gunther: I'm 10 times funnier and sexier than you Captain: 10 times 0 is still 0 though Gunther: Jokes on you, I can't do math

___

Captain: Mark, you need to apologize to Celci

Engineer Mark: *rolling his eyes* Fffffffiiiine!

Engineer Mark: *with strained politeness towards Celci* “Unfuck you,” or whatever

___

Wug: If Theoretical Human had to choose between Hideous Human and all the money Wug has in Wug’s wallet, which would Theoretical Human take? Mack: That depends, how much money are we talking about? Engineer Mark: Mack. . ! Wug: 63 cents. Mack: I'll take the money. Engineer Mark: MACK!!!

___

Captain: *to the Invincible II crew* Alright, listen up, you little shits!

Captain: *to Wug and The Bandit* Not you two. You’re angels and we’re glad to have you here

___

Engineer Mark: What did Vincent say when he lost his car in the parking lot?

Engineer Mark: “Where did my Van Gogh?”

Celci: *rolling her eyes* The correct pronunciation of “Gogh” is “goff,” you uncultured swine.

Engineer Mark: *gives Celci double birds* Well then, fuck Gogh.

Mack: *just passing through* Actually, both of you are wrong. Vincent Van Gogh was Dutch. His name is actually pronounced “Van KHOCK,” so, suck my Gogh.

___

Gunther: If I don’t pay up I’ll go to jail for tax evasion! I’m insane enough to take on drones and aliens. . .but the IRS? NOOOOOOOOOOO THANK YOUUUUUUU!!!

___

Gunther: Just trust me, alright? Have I ever put us in an unsafe or uncomfortable situation?

Mack: Yes? Literally all the time?!

Gunther: Then you should be used to it now, bitchboy 

___

Engineer Mark: I’m well aware of the fact that I’ve accidentally set myself on fire. 

Engineer Mark: Is that any of your business? No, it is not.

Engineer Mark: And no, I don’t need your pity water. Let me burn in peace.

___

Mack: *gently taps table*

Engineer Mark: *taps table in response*

Captain: What are they doing?

Burt: Using morse code

Mack: *now aggressively tapping the table*

Engineer Mark: *slams his hands down on the table* YOU TAKE THAT BACK!

___

Ms. Whitacare: Now, what are the three stages of life?

Celci: Birth

Captain: What the fuck is this

Engineer Mark: Death

___

Allu: Looks like you and your crew are all set. *Shakes hands with The Captain* Have fun on the rest of your journey. Please don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.

Engineer Mark: *raising an eyebrow* I thought you said to have FUN.

___

Captain, to a heavily injured Engineer Mark: We’re almost at MedBay, Mark. Quick, what’s your type?

Engineer Mark, a bit loopy: Vague features, a thoughtful attitude, a firm grip. . .

Captain: . . .

Captain: NO, I MEANT YOUR BLOOD TYPE!

Engineer Mark: . . .Oh.

Engineer Mark: Red

___

Captain: Name a more iconic duo than me and procrastination! Go ahead, I’ll wait.

Burt: Of course you will

Mack: I should kill you

___

Captain: I’m having a baby. 

Invincible II Crew: *celebrating* Wug: Really? Wow! Wug’s never seen infant humans befo— Captain: *slamming adoption papers on the table in front of Wug* It's you, sign here.

___

Mack: Let’s play a game. We all know the Captain and Mark will end up killing each other, inadvertently or not, but what about everyone else? Celci: Gunther will do some murdering, but in the end, he’ll ultimately be murdered. Gunther: *nodding* I can see that Burt: What about me? Celci: You crave toast while taking a bath

Burt: *under his breath* I do love bath snacks

___

Celci: Dammit, Mark! Engineer Mark: What?! It wasn’t me! Celci: Wait, seriously? Sorry, force of habit. Dammit, Gunther! Gunther: Not me either. Celci: Oh. . .Then who set the ship on fire? Mack, who will swear on the wormhole that he saw a spider in his cryopod: *whistles nervously*

___

Captain: There is no future. There is no past. Don’t you see? Time is simultaneous, an intricately structured jewel that we humans insist on viewing one edge at a time, when the whole design is visible in every facet. Engineer Mark: . . . Celci: . . . Gunther: . . .

Burt: . . . 

Chica: . . .

Mack: . . . The Rest of the Invincible II Crew At The Captain’s Surprise Birthday Party: . . . Tyler, piping up: . . .All Mark asked was if you wanted to cut your birthday cake first. . .

___

Engineer Mark: We are now one day closer to eating our next plate of nachos. Gunther: That’s. . .the most hopeful thing I've heard all week. Captain: But what if we die tomorrow and never eat any nachos? Burt: Then tomorrow is nacho lucky day.

Celci: *shoving Burt towards the airlock* GET OUT!!!! 

___

Engineer Mark: Where do I hide?

Gunther: You don’t hide. You’re the bait. Go act. . .baity, or something

Engineer Mark: What’s the plan?

Celci: The enemies attack you.

Engineer Mark: And then what?

Mack The enemies kill you. We watch. We rejoice.

___

Gunther: I just ended a five-year relationship. . .

Engineer Mark: Oh, I’m sorry to hear that, buddy! Are you okay? Gunther: Yeah? It wasn’t MY relationship

___

Engineer Mark: *looks into a nearby mirror and sighs sadly* Everyone hates the way I look. I have the sex appeal of a math textbook.

Mack: Well, that’s just completely inaccurate!

Engineer Mark: *pauses, then slowly looks at Mack* Really.  . ?

Mack: *nods* I’ve never known anyone who’s opened a math textbook without saying “fuck me”

___

Celci: I want to roll my eyes right now, but the doctor said if I keep doing that, my ocular muscles might spasm and eject my eyeballs.

___

Engineer Mark: I really hit rock bottom last night. And I mean that literally—I fell into a pit and hit a rock.

Engineer Mark: I remember lying there thinking, “There’s probably a good reason why I’m down here.”

Engineer Mark: And then I started thinking, “I need morphine”

___

Gunther: Self care is actually getting into fights with randoms in dark alleys. Celci: No, self care is stuff like taking a bubble bath, or putting on a lot of makeup if you like it, or taking a nice cat nap. Wug: Self care is the burning heat of rage washing over you!! Self care is when you feel bones crack under your powerful fists!! Self care is fear in your enemies’ eyes!!! Engineer Mark: Lmao self care is taking your birthday cake just so I can eat the frosting. Mack: If you so much as touch my birthday cake before me, I’ll make you eat your hands.

___

Celci: *setting down a card* Ace of spades Engineer Mark: *pulling out an Uno card* +4 Mack: *pulling out a Pokémon card* Jolteon, I choose you Allu: *trembling* What kind of human game is this?

___

Mack: Dumbest scar stories, go! Celci: I burned my tongue once drinking tea. Engineer Mark: I dropped a hair dryer on my leg once and burned it. Gunther: I have a piece of graphite in my leg for accidentally stabbing myself with a pencil in the first grade. Burt: I was taking a cup of noodles out of the microwave and spilled it on my hand and got a really bad burn. Captain: . . . Captain: I have emotional scars.

___

Celci: If you bite it and you die, it’s poisonous. If it bites you and you die, it’s venomous. Engineer Mark: What if it bites me and it dies? Mack: Then you’re poisonous. Jesus Christ, Mark, learn to listen. Captain: What if it bites itself and I die? Burt: That’s voodoo. Wug: What if it bites Wug and someone else dies? Allu: That’s correlation, not causation. Bandit: What if we bite each other, and neither of us die? Gunther: That’s kinky. Celci: Oh my God.

___

[The Invincible II crew is standing around a broken coffee maker]

Captain: *folds their arms across their chest, addressing the crew* So. Who broke it? I’m not mad, I just wanna know.

Everyone: *remains silent* . . .

Wug: *piping up, surprisingly meek* . . .Wug did. Wug broke it.

Captain: *shakes their head knowingly* No. No, you didn’t. Mark?

Engineer Mark: *holds up his hands in defense* Don’t look at me, Captain. Look at Celci.

Celci: What?! I didn’t break it!

Engineer Mark: Huh, that’s weird. How’d you even know it was broken?

Celci: *raises an eyebrow* Because it’s sitting right in front of us and it’s broken.

Engineer Mark: *puts his hands on his hips and squints at Celci* Suspicious.

Celci: *reasonably exasperated* No, it’s not!

Burt: If it matters, probably not, but Gunther was the last one to use it.

Gunther: Liar! I don’t even drink that crap!

Burt: Oh really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?

Gunther: *flexes his hand, showing off his nicely-manicured fingernails* I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that, Burt!

Wug: *coming between Gunther and Burt, lightly pushing them away from one another* No fighting, humans! Wug broke it. Wug will fix it, Friend Captain.

Captain: No! Who broke it?!

Everyone: *remains silent* . . .

Gunther: *notices that Mack has just entered the room* Cap. . .Mack’s been awfully quiet.

Mack: *does a neck-snapping doubletake* rEALLY?!

[Everyone starts arguing. The fight gets louder and more out of control by the second]

Captain: *now being interviewed. The argument is still going on in the background* I broke it. It burned my hand, so I punched it on reflex.

Captain: *glances over their shoulder at the crew* I predict ten minutes from now, they’ll be at each other’s throats with warpaint on their faces and a pig’s head on a stick.

Captain: . . .

Captain: *smiles mischievously with one eye twitching* Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.

___

Captain: Time for Plan G. Wug: Don’t you mean Plan B? Captain: No, we tried Plan B a long time ago. I had to skip over Plan C due to technical difficulties. Burt: What about Plan D? Captain: Plan D was that desperate disguise attempt half an hour ago. Gunther: What about Plan E? Captain: I’m hoping not to use it. Mark dies in Plan E. Celci and The Bandit: *in almost perfect unison* I like Plan E.

___

Mack: Back in college, we literally named our volleyball team “NO GAMES SCHEDULED,” because if the other team didn’t show up, they lost their league deposit and forfeited. It worked several times. Everyone hated us and nothing as cool as that has happened to me since.

Captain: . . .You’ve got real issues, man.

___

Gunther: Truth or dare? Captain: Dare Gunther: I dare you to kiss the hottest person in the room Captain: Hey, Mark? Engineer Mark: *blushing* Yeah? Captain: Could you move? I’m trying to get to the Bandit 

___

Captain: You can throw around all the French you want! It doesn’t make you right!

Mack: Au contraire

___

Captain: Hewwo. Engineer Mark: Hihiiiiii! Allu: Greetings, Humans. Celci: Three kinds of people. Wug: Wug want donuts. Bandit: Four kinds of people. Gunther: WHAT’S UP FUCKERS? Celci: Five kinds of people.

___

Bandit: Rules are made to be broken. Allu: They were made to be followed. Nothing is made to be broken. Captain: Uh, piñatas. Engineer Mark: Glow sticks. Gunther: Karate boards. Burt: Spaghetti when you have a small pot. Bandit: Rules. Allu: . . .

___

Engineer Mark: *seeing how Mack manipulated and betrayed The Captain* Look at this! You played them like a fiddle!

Mack: *considers this, then shakes his head* Oh no, Mark. Fiddles are actually pretty difficult to play

Mack: I played the Captain like the cheap kazoo they were

___

Gunther: Who the fuck added me to a fucking group chat? Celci: >:O language Wug: Yeah, human! Watch your fucking language Captain: OKAY WHO TAUGHT WUG THE FUCK WORD? Engineer Mark: 'The fuck word'. Burt: Are you stupid? You guys use the f word all the time Bandit: Oh my god they censored it Gunther: Say fuck, Burt. Engineer Mark: Do it, Burt. Say fuck.

___

Mack: Don't worry, I’ve got a plan. Captain: Alright. Mack: TraitorSayWhat? Engineer Mark: Excuse me? Mack: What? Captain: . . . Engineer Mark: . . . Mack: No wait—

___

Engineer Mark: “Smile!”

Captain: “Sweet!”

Celci: “Sister!”

Mack: “Sadistic!”

Wug: “Surprise!”

Burt: “Service!”

Gunther:  “succ” 

___

Allu: I CAN'T DO IT! Bandit: *laughing* I CAN'T EITHER! Allu: I CAN’T FUCKING DO IT ANYMORE Celci: WELL I'LL TELL YOU WHAT, YOU CAN EITHER GIVE UP NOW, OR YOU CAN FIGURE IT OUT. BECAUSE WE CERTAINLY CAN'T DO IT WITHOUT YOU, AND WE KNOW YOU CAN'T DO IT WITHOUT US. Allu: . . . Allu: I appreciate it, Allu: BUT LOOK WHAT WE'RE DEALING WITH! Wug: Miss Lady— Allu: YOU GOTTA DRAW THE LINE SOMEWHERE! Mack: Look, we gotta— Allu: YOU GOTTA DRAW A FUCKING LINE IN THE SAND. YOU GOTTA MAKE A STATEMENT. Allu: YOU GOTTA LOOK INSIDE YOURSELF AND SAY 'What am I willing to put up with today?' Allu: *motioning to The Captain and Engineer Mark* NOT FUCKING THIS!!!

___

Captain: I trust Mark. Celci: You think he knows what he’s doing? Captain: I wouldn't go that far.

___

Captain: In your opinion, what’s the height of stupidity? Celci: *turning to Engineer Mark* How tall are you?

___

Wug: Wug kind of crushing on someone, but Wug’s worried about telling Friend Mark who it is, because Friend Mark won’t like it Engineer Mark: Just rip the bandage off. Wug: It Friend Captain Engineer Mark: *grinding his teeth together* Put the bandage back on.

___

Engineer Mark: Would you guys be there for me if I was going through something?

Celci: Nope, absolutely not. Bandit: I hope it sucks, whatever you're going through. Wug: Wug hopes it emotionally scars Hideous Human for the rest of Hideous Human’s life. Allu: I hope you reach out to me so I can ignore you. Ms. Whitacare: I can't wait to go to your funeral, knowing I could've changed that outcome.

___

Captain: *running towards the airlock* I’m gonna jump!

Mack: Do a flip!

___

Allu: *to The Captain* The universe is in the hands of an idiot! Captain: *motioning to themself and Engineer Mark* No no no no no, TWO idiots!

___

Captain: Stressed

Celci: Depressed

Mack: Possessed

Engineer Mark: Obsessed

Allu: Unimpressed 

Wug: Chicken breast

Everyone: . . .What?

Wug: Wug just wanted to join in.

___

Bandit: Wait, hold up, why do you draw yourself like that?

Captain: Uh, like what?

Bandit: Like with gorgeous, muscular legs

Captain: This is what I look like.

Bandit: . . .

Captain: THIS IS WHAT I LOOK LIKE!

Bandit: Okay, then I want big, beefy arms. Hot ones.

Wug: Wug wants a cowboy hat!

Captain: Okay, arms and hat *draws them*

Burt: Ooh, give me a cowboy hat, too!

Captain: You can’t just take Wug’s hat idea, Burt! They thought it up all by themself like a good person! Come up with your own thing!

Burt: BUT I WANNA LOOK COOL!

Engineer Mark: Put Celci on one of those stupid baby tricycles.

Celci: NO!!

Captain: Tricycle, done. *draws it* Gunther, want anything?

Engineer Mark: *making finger guns* Pew pew.

Captain: Another gun? That’s kind of already his thing. Gunther, do you want something different? 

Gunther: *glaring and aggressively making finger guns* PEW. PEW.

Captain: You know what? Okay *draws it* But it’s just for holding, not for shooting.

___

Mack: *standing on a chair* The floor is lava!

Burt: *helps other crew members onto the counter*

Gunther: *shoots the floor while jumping up and down*

Wug: *practically latches onto the ceiling*

Engineer Mark and Celci: *trying to shove each other off the sofa*

Captain: *lays on the floor*

Mack: . . .Captain, are you okay?

Captain: No.

___

Gunther: Imagine if someone handed you a box full of all the things you lost in your life.

Burt: It would be nice to have my sense of purpose back. . .

Bandit and Celci: Oh, wow! My childhood innocence! Thank you for finding this!

Engineer Mark: My will to live! I haven’t seen this in years!

Wug: Wug knew Wug left that potential somewhere!

Captain: Mental stability, my old friend!

Gunther: Jesus, you guys need to lighten up already

___

Engineer Mark: Is it still visible? Where Celci slapped me?

Mack: Your face looks like a “Don’t Walk” signal

Burt: Your face looks like a photo negative for the Hamburger Helper mascot.

Bandit: A palm reader could tell Celci’s future by looking at your face.

Gunther: The phrase, “Talk to the hand cuz’ the face ain’t listenin’” doesn’t work for you right now, because the hand is your face.

Engineer Mark: . . .A simple “yes” would’ve sufficed.

___

Gunther: If you put “violently” in front of everything to describe your action, it becomes funnier!

Celci: Violently studies

Burt: Violently sleeps

Wug: Violently orders food

Captain: Violently slips into existential crisis over an endless cycle of increasingly-specific choices offered by too many timelines to keep track of, because APPARENTLY life wasn’t already meaningless enough. 

Captain: Oh, and violently succumbs to depression and madness due to possibility of killing innocent people because another version of you decided to use boredom and curiosity as an excuse to stop caring about basic morality.

Everyone: . . .

Engineer Mark: Violently worries about the previous statement

___

Captain: *dies*

Narrator: Timer starts now! When are they coming bacK? I say two months!

Eldritch Plier: Bullshit. One month.

Bandit: Nah, half a month

Literally everyone else on the Invincible II: *sobbing* WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! THE CAPTAIN JUST DIED!

Engineer Mark: *scratching his chin in thought* One week.

___

Captain: The Bandit kissed me!

Engineer Mark: *slack-jawed, eyes twitching* Oh my God.

Captain: *completely oblivious* It was unbelievable!

Engineer Mark: *getting noticeably choked-up* Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God—

Celci: Okay, we wanna hear everything. Mark, get the wine and unplug the phone. 

Mack: Captain, does this end well, or do we need tissues?

Captain: Oh, it ended very well.

Engineer Mark: *gritting his teeth and blinking back tears* Do not start without me. . .

Celci: Alright, let’s hear about the kiss. Was it a soft brush against your lips, or was it like a, y’know, “I gotta have you now” kind of thing?

Captain: Well, at first it was really intense, y’know? And then, oh God, and then we just sort of sunk into it.

Mack: Ohh. . .So, okay, was she holding you? Or were her hands on your back?

Captain: First she started out on my waist, and then her hands slipped up and then were in my hair.

Celci and Mack: Ohhh.

[Meanwhile, elsewhere on the Invincible II]

Bandit: *eating some glowing alien pizza from the intergalactic fast food place* And, uh. . .then I kissed them.

Wug: Tongue?

Bandit: Yeah.

Wug: Cool.

___

Allu: Wow, they look like a real handful. How do you deal with them?

Captain, watching Gunther screaming at nothing, Engineer Mark trying to set a sleeping Celci on fire, and Burt choking on air: I don’t know either.

___

Captain: What if the person who named Walkie-Talkies named everything?

Gunther: Pregnancy tests would be Maybe-Babies

Engineer Mark: Socks would be Feetie-Heaties

Bandit: Defibrillators would be Heartie-Starties

Wug: Nightmares would be Dreamy-Screamies

Burt: Stamps would be Lickie-Stickies

Celci: I hate you guys so much.

___

Mack: *teleports behind The Captian* I like ya cut, G

Mack: *dropkicks The Captain into the dungeon*

[SLAP]

[venomous--fics]

Summary: Your husband, Eddie Brock, loses his job after he intentionally (or unintentionally) ruins a meeting with Carlton Drake. Now, after what seemed like a complete mental break and some shady deals, he won't answer the phone.

Pairing: Eddie Brock x Wife!Reader

A/N: Day 17! Hope you enjoy! This was something that I brought out of the drafts. I've had it written for awhile, I just forgot to post it. What better time to do that then now?

You paced around the living room. Your phone was on speaker, left on the coffee table, and all it would do is ring. You kept trying to call, but nobody would answer. This wasn't like Eddie at all. He always, no matter what, picked up. Was he mad at you? Was he okay? You began to rethink the disagreement you two had earlier.

"So, just like that, you're going?" You asked dryly.

"Yes." His tone was as equally flat, "Why wouldn't I?"

"Eddie, you don't know this woman. She could be lying to you."

"What if she's not?" He snatched his jacket off the back of the chair, "This is my one chance to get my job back."

"There are other jobs." You replied, worry evident in your voice, "How do you know that this woman isn't tricking you. Eddie, don't you know what happens to people like you? Who know too much?"

"I'm well aware." He seemed unphased, almost like he was hoping it would pan out that way.

"Is your job really worth all that bullshit? What about me?"

"What about you? You weren't the one who got humiliated and fired."

Eddie opened the door and that's when your body moved before you could think. You grabbed his arm, "Eddie, just, take a walk and think about this, okay? Something just doesn't feel right about it all..."

"What is there to think about?"

He pulled away from you and shut the door behind him. That's when you noticed that he didn't even bother to grab his set of keys.

You should've ran after him, or Hell, even gone with him. At least if Eddie was dead, you'd go right with him, right? God, why isn't he picking up.

Voicemail. Again.

You hung up and sat on the couch, putting your face into your hands, "Oh, Eddie. What am I going to do-"

Your phone began ringing, and you answered it with absolutely no hesitation, "Eddie- Oh. Hey, Anne."

"Have you seen Eddie? Dan and I have been trying to call him, and he won't answer." Anne seemed frustrated at the situation, "We were trying to talk to him about the hospital earlier and he just left-"

"Hospital?!"

Oh my god. Your brain was whirling. Eddie got hurt, and now he's hobbling around San Francisco, probably bleeding out somewhere. You should go look for him.

"Hi, hello." Dan cut in, quite politely, "Dan here. I assure you that Eddie will be fine if we get him back to the hospital."

"I-I," You stood up, looking around frantically for your own jacket, "I can go look for him around here. Maybe he's hiding out at Mrs. Chen's shop."

"Call us if you find him." Anne said, promptly hanging up.

Screw the jacket, you thought. You just needed to find Eddie. You nearly tripped on the rug on your way over to the door.

Had you not tripped, then you would've been hit square in the face as the door fell open, and quickly slammed shut.

You stood up straight, looking in disbelief, "Eddie?"

Eddie looked like an absolute train wreck. Sweaty, holes in his favorite hoodie. His face really emphasized the fact that he was ill. He just looked drained.

"Eddie, are you okay... Where have you been?" You tone was gentle as you took a step towards him, "I've been trying to call you for the last hour."

He seemed shaky, shushing someone or something.

What a tasty snack we have here.

"No!" Eddie screamed, practically slamming his fist down on the island, making you jump. "She is my wife and you will not touch her! Do I make myself clear!"

You took several steps back, bumping into the back of the couch. Eddie's never gotten mad like that before. And who the hell was he yelling at? There was nobody else here.

"We should go to the hospital." Is all you could think to say, "You need help."

Eddie violently shook his head, putting his hands over his ears. He almost looked like he was in pain. Putting your fear aside, you rushed over to him, "Eddie, please! You're really sick, let's just go."

"I can't do that." He said, lowering his voice to a whisper, "He doesn't like that."

"He?"

Again, he made a loud shushing noise. He seemed more upset by the sounds of it.

You really needed him to calm down if you two were going to be able to get anything accomplished. Eddie seemed so frazzled by whatever happened, and you wanted to know exactly what that was.

And sometimes, you wish you'd stop asking questions, because most of the time you don't like the answer.

You watched in horror as a black, slimey substance enveloped Eddie, against his wishes. Knowing how most horror movies you'd watched play out, you rushed back. The creature that stood before you had to slouch forward a little as to not go through the ceiling. Slightly considerate, but made him all the more terrifying.

"Eddie?" You asked, voice shaking.

Tendrils shot out and wrapped around your arms, pulling your forward. You did your best to pull back, but whatever this was was way stronger than you. It was like playing tug of war with a dog that you knew was too strong for you.

"Eddie's not here anymore."

You were not going to stop. You had to get this thing off of you, but no matter how or where you pulled, he pulled back ten times harder. Was it going to eat you? Well, no shit, but was it going to hurt- Ah, again, no shit, probably.

"Let me go!" You yelled, tripping as you tugged again.

More tendrils took over on your legs and before you could put up an unfair fight, you were whipped up into the air, upside down. You were dangling right in front of this creatures face. You stared into his eyes, watching the drool ooze out of his mouth.

His toothy grin was going to haunt you if he didn't actually eat you. You didn't want to die this way. You watched in horror as his tongue slithered out of his mouth, sickly grin growing wider.

"I hope it puts you at ease knowing you're the prettiest snack I've had tonight."

It didn't put you at ease. In fact, you wanted to throw up. Your heart was pounding of your chest, sounding more like a ticking timebomb instead of an organ. The blood rushing to your head wasn't helping any of this either.

This was the end, you were sure of it. You shut your eyes and just prayed that this would be over quickly.

And it was, because the next thing you felt was the hardwood floor connecting with the back of your head. You groaned as you forced yourself to roll over, just in case you had to push yourself up and get away.

"Oh my god, oh my god!" Eddie kept repeating as he crawled to your side, "Are you okay?"

You couldn't answer. You had no strength left. Hitting the floor knocked the wind out of you.

Eddie carefully rolled you over and held you in his arms, "Hey, it's okay. I am so sorry- I- I'm sorry. I don't know why this is happening."

You forced your eyes open, everything looking like it was out of focus, "Eddie?"

"Yes, baby, it's me. I'm here." He kept blubbering, "I'm so sorry. I don't know why that- I don't- I'm sorry."

Everything processed in your head as you stared at him blankly. Did you just hallucinate or was that actually a giant ass alien? Why does this stuff always happen to you?

"What was that?"

"I don't know- I don't think I want to know." He sputtered out, "Please tell me your okay."

"Fine. Head just hurts." You groaned once you thought about how hard you hit it, "And I got the dickens scared out of me."

"I'll," He looked around, "I'm going to put you on the couch and get an icepack, okay?"

"Was that thing really going to eat me?"

As Eddie was about to answer, he heard footsteps come through the door. Men with their weapons drawn, aimed and him and you.

"Mr. Brock, I believe you have some of our property."

Eddie slowly looked over his shoulder, holding you even closer.

"Let me take care of this."

Eddie looked up slightly and whispered, "What- What do you mean. What does that mean."

"It means, Eddie, let me do my job."

[smartycvnt]

Over It

pairing: Seth Rollins x Reader

summary: you get injured during a match and seth has a hard time dealing with it.

The meeting about ring awareness and safety had been a big deal after Big E broke his neck. Nobody thought that they'd be going to another one so soon after that one. And yet, in a matter of seconds, it happened again. Every so often, Vince remembered that you had been feuding with Shayna Baszler, and gave the two of you a match. The two of you worked well together, your flashier moves and her brutal attacks made for an interesting combination. This match was going to end in a count out, so neither of you would really win it. To set that in motion, you jumped from the ring post to the announcer's table, where you'd kick Shayna down on the way.

"Are you okay?" Shayna asked as she pulled herself over to where you were laying. There had always been the risk of overshooting it, but you hadn't expected to quite so much. You completely cleared Shayna, who had moved to try and catch you anyways, and caught your leg on the back of the table and a steel chair. There had been a sickening crack when you hit the ground, but you hadn't been sure whether or not it was the table or your leg.

"Get me out of here!" you screamed out in pain. Shayna rolled away from you and stood back to let the medics take you away. She leaned against the ring for a moment to think over whether or not there had been something else she could have done before going backstage. Unsurprisingly to her, Seth was waiting at the gorilla for her.

"What happened out there?" Seth looked frantic, like every ounce of rational thought had escaped him the moment you took that hit. "Did you even try to pull her back?"

"And what, break her neck? I couldn't have grabbed her without it being worse than it already is. Seth, I am sorry, I really am, but I think she's probably lucky it didn't end worse." Shayna should have known he wouldn't listen to her. "Just, go be with her. She's in pain and probably freaking out, so instead of yelling at me for this, comfort Y/n."

"She'd better come back from this." Seth left it at that and left to get to you. You were already pretty hopped up on pain killers when he got there, which meant you were able to calm him down quite a bit.

"Sethie!" It was a nickname he hadn't heard from you in forever. It'd never been spoken seriously, mainly when you were drunk or making fun of him for getting mad at a game. "They won't let me move around."

"Well, maybe that's a good thing," Seth said, much to your dismay. You reached towards him, but the restraints only get you move so much. He got the memo, though, and leaned down give you a kiss. "How are you feeling?"

"Like I fucked up out there. That table was not as far away as I thought," you chuckled. Seth frowned you making light of the situation, even if you didn't know better. He didn't keep you up too much longer, but he doubted that he would have been able to if he wanted. You fell asleep, a few doctors updated him on your injuries putting you out for at least six months, and then he finally let himself relax enough to fall asleep as well. There was no point in being in a bad mood in the morning when he broke the news to you.

"People are talking about you. Everybody's wishing you a speedy recovery," Seth told you as he scrolled through his Twitter. You smiled, but got noticeably quieter. While he had been gathering your things to bring you home, you'd been chatty and very animated. At the first mention of your return, you shrunk back into yourself a little. "What's wrong?"

"I'm not going back Seth. I've never been more terrified in my life. I can't do it again, and let's face it, even with a good recovery it won't be the same. Better to quit with the run I've had than to keep going and ruin my body even more. There's more than just my own ambition to think about now. You make me want more than just a career," you told him.

"So, you're done?" Seth asked and you nodded.

"Yeah, I guess you could say I'm over it now. Time for me to find something else, something safer." Seth looked conflicted, but he let you make this decision yourself. It wasn't his career, and he couldn't make that decision for you. Even though he did think that it was a genuine shame that you were stepping away.

[biggest-stupidhead]

I was wondering if you’d be interested in doing a nsfw story about Levi + f reader getting walked in on by one of the cadets? Then Levi needing to the the Corps about their relationship then ending with some fluff/Levi holding his ground when others are upset about about a relationship in the workplace? I would really appreciate it 🥰

AN: this is such a cute request! I feel like I could've done a better job with this one so maybe I'll come back to it haha

Summery: Jean, Sasha, and Connie walk in on you and Levi. Chaos ensues.

Word Count: 1.7K

Warnings: oral sex fem receiving, cussing.

kinda steamy in the beginning so a put a cut just in case you aren't into that ;)

______

Moments like this were fleeting and far between. You took what you could get, in empty storage rooms, open fields, in his office. Levi's breath was hot against your lips as he pressed you up against his desk, his knee slotted between your legs. You pulled away briefly to jump onto his desk, sweeping the papers off to the side. He shot you an irritated look but you only smirked wryly back at him. His hands were planned on your knees, prying them apart with fervor and then tugging you closer to the edge so he could press his growing bulge to your own needy cunt.

You groaned and rolled your hips into his as he pressed his hungry mouth to yours. You opened your mouth wider, allowing him to slip his tongue in and properly taste you.

"Levi, we've got to hurry." You felt delirious as he kissed down your throat, his lips burning your skin. His fingers began to tug at the straps of your gear and you began to unbuckle his own belts and buttons. After you had both been stripped of your tops he continued to kiss his way down your chest, gently urging you to lay back on the desk. You did so, propping yourself up on your elbows so you could watch as he tugged your pants down to rest at your ankles. He lifted your legs over his shoulders, bringing his mouth to your dripping pussy.

You spread your legs as wide as you could but he grabbed your thighs and brought them to press tightly against his ears, his stormy grey eyes blown out. You whimpered as he liked a fleeting stripe up the length of your pussy, your hips rolling to meet his tongue. He had just begun to tease your clit when the sound of the doorknob rattling made your heart leap into your throat.

"Levi" your fingers that had been in his hair, pushing him closer to you now tugged his hair, urging him to get his face out from between your legs.

"Mf" His voice was muffled as he still had his lips pressed against your cunt.

"Stop!" You hissed, but it was too late, the door swung open, Jean, Sasha, and Connie stood with wide eyes as they took in the scene before them.

"Captain!" Connie cried, Jean's hands flew to either side and covered his friends’ eyes, while his remained wide as he watched Levi scramble to cover you. You pressed yourself against his back, looking over his shoulder.

"Get the fuck out." Levi's voice shook a bit and Jean nodded, steering his friends away before reaching back for the doorknob and slamming the door shut.

"I told you to stop." You hissed, fingernails digging into his shoulders. His hand was pressed over his eyes, hiding the flush that had developed on his cheeks.

"I know." He groaned, turning to face you, his usual stoic exterior slowly falling back into place.

“Well, what do we do now?” Panic was bubbling up in your throat, thoughts of the cadets going to Erwin or even worse, Hange.

“I’m thinking.” Levi stepped away from you, the mood ruined. You stumbled off of the desk and tugged your pants back on, hurrying to buckle your gear back on.

“We can’t not address it.” You thought aloud as Levi buttoned his shirt.

“I thought I locked the door.” Levi seemed to still be in shock, and you felt for him.

“It doesn’t matter anymore, they saw and now we have to confront them.” You said tugging your jacket on over your shoulders.

“We should call them back in here. Tell them to keep quiet.” You were pacing now, the bare soles of your feet padding against the pristine wood floors.

“They probably already spilled to half of the regiment by now.” Levi scoffed, stooping down to pick up the papers you had tossed onto the ground.

“We’ve got to try.” You felt helpless, so irresponsible, and guilty. You were here for humanity, you weren’t supposed to get caught up in your lust. You were a soldier damn it.

“Fine, you go round them up then.” Levi flicked his wrist towards the door and you scowled at the back of his head as you marched off to find the kids.

____

You found them in the mess hall, all of the 104th cadets gathered at one of the large tables. You figured that at this point it would be easier to just bring Levi here. But you paused, noticing that they had not yet felt your presence.

“I don’t believe a word out of your mouths.” Reiner sat with a skeptical look on his face.

“Yeah, no way they would do that on Levi’s desk. He’s too much of a clean freak.” It was Armin speaking now, his fingers twisted together as he processed the information.

“You’ve got to believe us! They were about to fuck right there in the office!” It was Jean who was speaking now, Connie and Sasha both began yelling over him in a hurry to agree. You decided to cap it now before it got too rowdy and anyone else walked into the conversation.

“Cadets,” You rounded the corner you had been hiding behind and they all stood, chairs scraping against the cobblestone floors. Their firsts were clenched over their hearts as you stood with your chin held high.

“Stay here we have something that needs to be discussed.” Their faces were flushed with embarrassment at being caught gossiping. Then slowly sat back down as you retreated, hurrying to get Levi. You came back a few short minutes later, Levi in tow the cadets were silent now, faces turned down to look at the table.

“...” The silence was thick as Levi remained by the door, clearly, he wanted you to take charge here.

“The rumors are true.” You said simply, their heads whipped up, eyes wide with astonishment.

“Captain Levi and I are in a relationship. We’re sorry that you three saw us earlier.” You apologized and Connie’s ears were so red as he avoided eye contact with you.

“I thought relationships were strictly forbidden,” Jean mumbled, and you inhaled sharply.

“They can be...tricky. But I don’t feel that we have to explain ourselves to you. Our relationship has no impact on you.” You glanced back at Levi who was glaring daggers at the kids.

“But you’re our squad leaders.” Armin looked concerned.

“Yes, and we don’t intend to let it affect our work here.” Levi finally spoke up, taking a few more steps into the room to stand next to you.

“But captain-” Eren didn’t get to finish his thought, Levi held up a hand for silence and he deflated in his seat.

“You’re 16 years old you know better than to stick your noses in other people’s business,” Levi grumbled, and the kids all shared some uneasy looks.

“Or at least I hope.” He turned on his heel to leave and you shot the kids a tight-lipped grin.

“See you guys in the morning.” You waved at them and they all looked at you, clearly, they had more questions. But frankly, you didn’t feel like explaining anything to them.

___

You never got to finish what you started with Levi earlier that evening. Instead, the two of you ended up in his office going through the stacks of paperwork and letters that needed signing. You had been working in silence, sipping on lukewarm cups of tea when there was a soft knock at the door. It was timid and it made you flinch, you looked to Levi since it was his office after all.

“Enter.” He said plainly, not even glancing up from his work. Hange came in with Connie in tow, Connie’s shirt balled up in Hange’s fist.

“I got the best news today.” Hange thrust Connie in front of them, their brown eyes alight with mischief.

“Oh? And what would that be?” Levi refused to give them the satisfaction of acting surprised or nervous.

“A little birdie told me that you two were fornicating here in this very room.” They sat down heavily in the sofa and propped their feet up on the small coffee table.

“Really.” Levi huffed, setting his pen aside and looking up, glaring daggers at Connie.

“I-I swear they just heard me and Sasha talking about it! I didn’t mean to tell them!” Connie fell to his knees, hands clasped together in a pleading motion.

“Hange, this is so unprofessional.” You groaned, running a hand through your hair.

“Oh yeah? And getting down and dirty in the office is professional?” They cackled as you rolled your eyes and stood from your seat. Now it was your turn to manhandle Connie. You grabbed his shoulder and hauled him to his feet, pushing him towards the door. He turned and grabbed your forearm, and you paused.

“You gotta believe me (Y/n) I’m really sorry and I’m happy for you two I really am!” He was rambling and you gave him a soft smile before shoving him out of the door.

“Yeah, Connie I believe you, go to bed.” You ruffled his nonexistent hair before sending him on his way. He smiled up at you before turning and running off down the hall. Hange was still comfortable on the couch, and Levi was still scribbling away at his desk.

“Hange you have two seconds before I lay your ass on that floor.” Levi threatened and Hange groaned before standing up slowly and walking backwards towards the door.

“Bye Hange.” You waved to them and they saluted you, fingers pressed to their forehead as they slipped out of the room and shut the door behind them.

“We’ll talk later.” They promised and you nodded in agreement. Once they were gone you rounded the desk and stooped to press a kiss to Levi’s temple. He grunted but leaned into your touch as you rubbed his shoulder.

“It’s been a long day, you should go to bed soon.” You knew that he wouldn’t but you would never stop trying to get him to sleep.

“Mhm.” He mumbled as your fingers wandered into his hair, massaging his scalp.

“I mean it.” You said, this time pressing a kiss to the corner of his lips. He loosened up, his head turning to finally face you.

“I’ll try...stay a while longer.” His soft plead made your heart flutter and you hummed in response, placing a kiss on his lips.

“Sure, but I’m going to bed.” You laughed and Levi sighed, shoving his work aside and standing to follow you to his adjoining bedroom.

[imaginemcyt]

sisterinnit!

cc!wilbur soot x tommy’s older sister

tw: language

note: this one uses specifically she/her pronouns, however, you can replace them with your pronouns. it won’t change the story at all. sorry that this is kinda shit but tumblr deleted my draft and i had to completely rewrite it so this is what i’ve got. hope you enjoy! <3

“y/n this is wilbur, wilbur this is y/n.” tommy gave the basic introductions with a bored look on his face.

“y/n simons, pleasure to meet you.”

“wilbur soot, the pleasure is all mine.”

as he shook your hand, you stared into each other’s eyes. he wore a small smile, that was almost a smirk. was it just you, or was there electricity when your hands touched? that had to be in your head, right? your gaze lingered on the other for perhaps a little too long before you let go of each other’s hands.

“now get out, y/n.” tommy pushed you towards the door.

•••

“y/n can you see wilbur out? i’m busy!”

wilbur looked at you with a smile, causing you to blush. you nodded and yelled back at your brother, “yeah!”

you led wilbur to the front door, opening it and stepping to the side. you looked at him to find he was already looking at you. he grabbed your hand and placed a kiss on your knuckles.

“it was nice meeting you, y/n.”

as you stuttered out a reply, he gave you that same almost-smirk and turned away, walking down your driveway.

•••

“what are you doing up?”

you jumped, not expecting to see someone in your kitchen at two am. then you remembered tommy had invited friends over.

“oh, it’s you. i… i can’t sleep. what are you still doing awake?”

you filled a glass up with water and began to drink it, putting it in the sink when you were done.

“tommy snores really loud.”

you both let out a light laugh at your younger brother’s expense.

“well, since we’re both awake, do you want to do something? we could watch friends? that’s all i was doing anyway.”

“that sounds great.”

you both made your way up the stairs and into your room. you sat on the bed and set up the laptop with the episode you were currently on. eventually you were laying down together watching joey do lunges in all of chandler’s clothes.

(like this ^^^)

you were about halfway through a second episode when tommy interrupted.

“what the hell are you guys doing?”

you both looked up at the tired gremlin child.

“watching friends.” wilbur gave him a cheeky smile.

•••

“hello?”

“oh! uh, hello…?”

“oh it’s you, wilbur!” you spoke over your brother’s headset while he was in the bathroom.

“y/n? hi! what are you doing?”

“well tommy’s in the toilet so i wanted to see who he was talking to. turns out it’s you!”

wilbur let out a chuckle. “it’s me!”

“GET OUT OF MY BEDROOM!”

“uh oh, gotta go!” you threw down the headset before running for your life.

•••

“y/n, hang out with us!”

you stopped at the doorway, looking back at the group of boys all sitting on the floor. jack manifold, tubbo, and wilbur all stared up at you.

“no, y/n, get out of my room.” tommy spoke from his spot on the bed.

“aww, why can’t she stay?”

“yeah, tommy, don’t be a dick, man.”

“y/n, stay!”

“no, y/n, leave.”

you looked nervous, being pulled in two different directions, before ultimately deciding that you had other things to do.

“sorry guys, i should probably go.”

a chorus of disappointed groans and “aww”s left the group before you waved and closed the door behind you.

you went back to your room, deciding to give your brother his space despite your loneliness and boredom. you knew you’d want the same from him.

you decided to mess around with your ukulele to pass the time. you played your favorite song, singing along quietly. it wasn’t long before a knock on the door made you stop.

“come in.”

the door opened and none other than wilbur soot popped his head in.

“hey.”

“hey. tommy asked me to tell you to shut up, but i think you sound lovely.”

you turned slightly pink. “oh, uh, thanks. tell tommy i’m sorry and i’ll keep it down.”

“no need, he’s a prick anyway.” he made his way to where you sat on the bed, taking a seat next to you.

“what are you playing?”

you smiled and told him about how it was your favorite song by your favorite artist and you loved how fun it was. he requested you play a little bit for him, so you did. when you were done, you started to talk about it a little more.

at least until you realized he wasn’t listening. he was staring at your lips, leaning in. you followed suit.

the door burst open, causing you two to spring apart.

“wilbur, what the hell is taking so long? and what are you two doing in here with the door closed?”

wilbur smiled at tommy. “playing music, of course.”

tommy gave a skeptical look, dragging wilbur out of the room with a “keep it down, y/n!”

wilbur stopped at the doorway. “by the way, i quite like hanging out with you, y/n.”

•••

“your hands are so tiny!”

“they are not,” you gasped. “your hands are just huge, probably because you’re a giant of a man.”

wilbur laughed. “put your hand up,” he instructed. he touched his to yours gently, showing off the size difference.

you both giggled before stopping and looking into each other’s eyes. he gave you a gentle smile and slipped his fingers in between yours, interlocking them and holding your hand in his larger one.

you looked back at him and smiled.

•••

you knocked on the door three times, and he answered not long after.

“y/n? what are you doing here?”

“tommy thinks he left his sweater here and asked if i could drop by and pick it up on my way home.”

“oh yeah, one second.”

he disappeared for a moment before returning, holding your brother’s red hoodie. “here you go,” he said with a smile.

“thank you. sorry to bother you.”

“it’s no trouble. can i walk you home?”

you felt yourself heating up and smiled. “if you’d like.”

he nodded and grabbed his jacket. then you both started off toward the simons residence. you almost made it before it started raining.

it was light rain at first, so you carried on. however, it got heavier by the second, and pretty soon it was pouring on you two.

wilbur took off his jacket and held it above your heads. “we’re almost there, run!”

the two of you ran the rest of the way, only stopping once you got to your porch. you looked at each other for a moment, catching your breath. then you started laughing. you were both soaked and standing there like idiots, laughing at yourselves.

your laughter soon died down, and then you were just smiling at each other. he reached over to you and brushed a wet piece of hair behind your ear, getting it out of your face.

you weren’t stupid. you knew the look he was giving you was a lovestruck gaze, but you decided to play dumb.

“what?”

then finally it happened. after months of flirting and mutual pining, he closed the gap and kissed you. with his right hand on your face he crashed his lips to yours (a/n: that sounds violent but it’s not meant to be lol), pulling you closer with his left. you wrapped your arms around him, hands tangling in his hair.

passion mingled with desperation and you kissed long after you were breathless. you didn’t part until you heard a loud yell of disgust.

you instantly sprang apart with swollen lips and red faces.

“are you fucking kidding me? that’s my sister, man!” tommy yelled, glaring at wilbur.

he then looked to you. “and you, kissing my best mate?!”

you stood there shocked for a moment before coming to your senses.

“uhhh, I wasn’t kissing, were you kissing?” you said, turning to wilbur and praying to god he caught on to your obvious lie.

“no, i wasn’t kissing.” he shook his head.

“neither was i! see, no kissing here.”

“i’m not stupid,” said tommy, voice low and angry as opposed to the shock and disgust from before. “i saw everything.”

he then turned and walked away from the door, leaving you two alone again.

a moment of awkward silence passed. “i should probably… you know.” you said, pointing to the house.

“oh yeah, no, definitely.” he rubbed the back of his neck.

“and look, i’m sorry if i ruined your friendship with tommy. i know you guys are close, and i hope he forgives you.”

he gave you a sad smile. “same here, love.” he then kissed your cheek and took off into the rain once more.

you went inside and tried fixing things with tommy, who refused to speak to you. after sitting outside his bedroom door for nearly an hour, you finally gave up and headed back into your room. you opened discord.

[your username]: tommy’s ignoring me. i’ve just sat outside his room for an hour and he refuses to talk to me.

WilburSoot: i’ll give it a go.

he did not speak to wilbur. tommy left him on read every time.

•••

tommy avoided you entirely for two weeks. he left the room if you walked in, and he wouldn’t speak to you at the dinner table. your mother was curious what was going on between you two, but neither of you would say anything about it.

finally, you’d had enough.

you asked your mother to call tommy out of his room, since he wouldn’t answer if you were to try. she did, just wanting you two to speak again. once he arrived in the living room, you jumped him. you grabbed him around the middle and threw him on the couch, planting yourself on top of him so he couldn’t run away. your mum left the room.

“hey, you asshole, get off of me!”

“no, tommy! enough is enough! you’re not leaving until you hear me out!”

“no, i don’t want to talk to you!”

“too bad because i’m not moving until you hear what i have to say! i don’t want us to keep avoiding each other like this.”

he went silent and thought about it for a moment, an angry and skeptical look on his face. “…fine. get it over with.”

you took a deep breath.

“tommy, you’re my little brother, and i love you. i’ll always love you, even when you hate me. just know that i never meant to hurt you or make you angry. however… you can’t tell me how to live my life, or who i can be with. i want to be with wilbur. i can’t help it, tommy, i love him. you can be happy for me or not, that’s your choice. but what isn’t your choice, is who i love.”

by the end of your speech, your voice was shaking and your eyes were watery. you got off of tommy and helped him sit up.

his face softened. “you… you love him?”

your tears ran down your cheeks. you nodded. “i do.”

tommy sighed before pulling you into a hug. it was rare for him to show affection, especially to you, but after everything that happened between the two of you, he felt it was important.

“i love you, y/n. you’re my sister, i could never hate you. i’m happy for you. but just know, best mate or not, i’ll castrate him if he makes you sad.”

you laughed, wiping away your tears.

“i should… probably speak with wilbur, yeah?”

you nodded. tommy stood and went back to his room. you followed not long after, and even though you knew it was frowned upon, you stopped to listen at his door.

“tommy, thank god you’re speaking to me. listen, man, i–”

“do you love her, wilbur?”

“what?”

“my sister. do you love her?”

“i– yeah. yeah, i do.”

“good. listen, all i want is for y/n to be happy. meaning if you make her cry, i’ll murder you.”

wilbur chuckled on the other line, making you smile.

“you won’t have to worry about that. i promise you i’ll take care of her.”

“just don’t make my sister cry and don’t be gross in front of me, alright big man?”

“you’ve got yourself a deal, tommyinnit.”

you smiled again before heading off in the direction of your room.

[kiridarling]

𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐄 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐒.

katsuki bakugou | birthday gone wrong (aha), f!reader, baker!reader, pro hero!katsuki, blizzards, angst and smut, exhibitionism, cockwarming, begging, confessions. minors dni!

— 4.7k words

Wanna blow off some steam?

“Surprise!”

Katsuki jumps ten feet high, and the plastic grocery bags precariously balanced on each finger tear without a second thought. Apples hit the ground with a thud and the egg carton with a depressing slap; one that signifies the crack of at least half a dozen. Katsuki looks at the crowd, red-faced and livid, and Eijirou Kirishima intercepts the awkward silence with:

“Happy Birthday Bakubro! I know y—“

“Said that I didn’t want a fuckin’ party?” Katsuki growls, groceries forgotten on the forgotten. Eijirou looks guilty and chuckles, scratching the back of his head.

“W-Well, yeah, but—“

“Everybody out.”

People sigh, and you think you hear Denki whisper told you he’d kick us out. You hate to say that you foresaw a similar outcome. Katsuki’s never been one for people.

Especially you.

“Awe come on, Kacchan,” Izuku says with hands on his hips. “We came all this way! Just let us stay for a little bit.”

“Yeah!” Eijirou seems to cheer up once given a sliver of hope. “Plus, we got cake and stuff. And Just Dance.”

Katsuki narrows his eyes, but you know better—he’s always had a soft spot for the redhead. You all wait with baited breath, wondering if this entire evening was a bust, as Katsuki weighs his options in a pool of fallen groceries.

“One hour.”

Eijirou gasps so hard he chokes, and Katsuki’s generosity earns him applause from the audience. (Plus whoops and hollers from Denki and Mina.)

“And I mean it—y’all have sixty fuckin’ minutes before you’re gone without a goddamn trace. Kapeesh?”

“Kapeesh!”

Katsuki sighs, rubbing at his temples as he steps over the mess at the front door. You assume he’ll make Eijirou clean it up. “Whatever. Where’s the fuckin’ cake?”

Ah.

“In the kitchen, my good sir!” Denki says as he ushers the ash-blond into the said kitchen, the rest of the party hot on their heels. Eijirou grabs the cake from the fridge and you’re tense until the plate hits the marble of their island.

“Flavor?” Katsuki asks, raising an eyebrow.

“Uh, I dunno, [Y/N] made it,” Eijirou throws you under the bus, just like that, and you want to scoff at the way Katsuki freezes—if only for a moment. Eijirou’s oblivious as ever, “[Y/N]?”

“It’s red velvet,” you say, trying not to burn under Katsuki’s carmine eyes. You don’t know why he doesn’t look away.

“Frosting?”

“Buttercream.”

As if you’d give him anything else.

Eijirou tries his best to cram 26 candles into the cake before being forced to opt for 23 lest he ruin your decorations. Denki presses him to make a wish and Katsuki rolls his eyes as he blows out the candles. Eijirou wipes an invisible tear because ‘his boy is getting so old.’ Mina and Jiro cut the cake and people seem to enjoy it, and you think that maybe, reuniting with your high school friends after so long isn’t as bad as you thought it’d be.

Even if he said he never wanted to see you again.

“—due to the incoming blizzard, we highly suggest all those who reside in the red and orange zones stay inside until it passes; which should be around ten am tomorrow morning.”

You spoke too soon.

Katsuki turns to the crowd, and you know what he’s going to say before his lip curls.

“Out.”

“Kacchan, don’t be unreasonable!” Izuku says from his comfortable position on the couch. “We’d get caught in the storm if we leave now.”

“Not if you’re fuckin’ fast enough,” Katsuki growls, pulling the greenette’s to his feet by his hair. “Get out, I’m not bunking with you fuckers overnight.”

“Dude,” Denki points to the window, and if you hadn’t known any better, you would’ve thought the blizzard had already started. “If we leave now, we’ll literally die.”

“Die, then.”

Eijirou sighs, clapping his roommate on the back. “C’mon, man. You know we ca—“

There’s a whirr then a click, and the lights and tv die at once. You can’t see a thing but you definitely hear Katsuki shout:

“Motherfucker!”

Eijirou turns his phone flashlight on first; Katsuki’s busy angrily flicking at the light to no avail. You sigh, turning to the ash-blond (and ignoring those ugly fucking butterflies in your stomach.)

“It’s a blackout Katsuki. The lights aren’t going to work.”

“Don’t you think I fuckin’ know that, dumbass?” And your chest tightens because even though he’s not eighteen anymore, he sounds the same—but you aren’t sure why you expected him to sound so different either.

You lift an eyebrow (not that he can see it), “It doesn’t look like you do.”

Denki snorts at that, hollering about how you just owned the ash-blond as Katsuki yells at him to shut the fuck up. It’s...familiar and comfortable, like you’re all in high school again, before you had to worry about your friends dying in their line of work because you couldn’t be there with them.

Before you got injured.

“Well I mean, we have a few blankets,” Eijirou offers, and as your eyes slowly adjust to the dark, you’re convinced you see his figure cross the living room. “And like, sweatshirts if it gets too cold.”

“It’s already getting too cold,” Mina says, and you can’t help but agree. The quickly cooling room has the goosebumps raising on your shoulders, and you’re starting to regret forgetting your jacket at home.

“Okay! I don’t have that many, but,” Eijirou hollers from somewhere, before returning with a handful of cloth. He drops it onto the coffee table. “Plus Hanta and Denks left their hoodies here last time.”

“Oh shit, we did?” Hanta says, and you assume it’s his figure who starts digging through the clothes. “Totally thought I lost this, lol.”

“Did you just saw lol out loud?”

“I did.”

“Ooh Ei, do you still have that old Red Riot hoodie?” Mina asks, and all of a sudden, she’s all over the pile. She finds it before the redhead can answer and snatches it away with a gasp.

You watch the pile dissolve in the darkness, one by one, and by the time you reach for something, your palm hits the cool wood of the coffee table. Fuck.

“Oh [Y/N]! Do you need some of my blanket?” Mina offers, but the blanket is small, and wrapping it around both of your shoulders just renders it utterly useless. You shake your head after she tries for a while.

“It’s fine Mina, I’m not that cold,” you laugh, but she shakes her head vehemently.

“No! Girl c’mon, you look like you’re freezing!”

And, well. Freezing is a stretch. Sure, you’re a little cold, but you’ll live.

“Do you need my sweatshirt?” Eijirou asks, already pulling at the hem. You roll your eyes.

“I’m serious guys, it’s not that bad,” you say, waving your arms for emphasis. They all grumble but they give up, and you feel like you can finally relax.

Something soft and army green drops into your lap. You pick it up in confusion, before looking up to see who dropped it.

Katsuki looks down at you, face glowing white from the phone flashlights. His eyes pierce your soul nevertheless.

“I don’t ne—“

“Take it.”

Katsuki takes a seat next to you on the couch in his own hoodie. You don’t realize until you put it on that he gave you a sweatshirt themed after his own hero costume.

You can’t sleep.

You can’t sleep, and you’re sure it’s due to the temperature. The wind howls and it sounds like you’re in the eye of a tornado, loose branches knocking against the rattling glass, and upon looking through the window, you see nothing but stark white. You sigh, checking the time on your phone for the fiftieth time this hour. Yep. Still four am.

“Stop fuckin’ movin’, dumbass.”

You all decided to bunk in the living room for warmth. You’re surprised Katsuki stayed, though; you figured he would just head to his room and let you all fend for yourselves while he slept in a comfortable bed. But here he is, sleeping next to you on the cold fucking floor.

“Sorry,” you say, but it’s hard when your shivering and your jaw aches from stunting your chattering teeth. Katsuki and Eijirou only had a limited amount of sleeping bags, meaning you’ve got to share a blanket with the hulking ash-blond.

“You cold?” He grunts. You don’t know why he’s asking.

“No.”

Katsuki sighs, and you hear him adjust, the blanket sliding from your neck to your shoulder. “You’re a shit liar.”

You prop yourself up on your elbows to glare his way, and you look to notice Katsuki’s laying the same way.

“What’s your point?”

Katsuki doesn’t answer for a moment, but it doesn’t seem like he’s looking for an answer, either—his neon red eyes glow through the dark and straight into your soul, and the next time you shiver, it isn’t because of the temperature.

“You’re stubborn.”

You roll your eyes, scoffing, “Thought you figured that out senior year.”

Katsuki’s face flashes with an emotion you can’t quite pinpoint before it’s gone again. “Yeah. You’d think almost dying would fuckin’ fix that.”

You sigh. Looks like you’re having this conversation now, then.

“I didn’t almost die—“

“Yes, you fuckin’ did,” Katsuki snarls, and Denki almost stirs at his raised tone. “You took that bullet and you didn’t get up for months—“

“And then I woke up and everything was fine! Seriously Katsuki, what’s your problem? I lived.”

“My problem is that you shouldn’t have been there in the goddamn first place!” Katsuki says through grit teeth. You watch his temple roll underneath his hairline. “That was my fuckin’ fight. I don’t need some chick jumping in front of a bullet for me just ‘cause she thinks I can’t take it!”

You scoff, looking around to see if any of your other sleeping friends are listening because get a load of this guy. Naturally, they don’t respond.

“That’s what this is about? Oh, well I’m sorry I bruised your dignity because I didn’t want to see you get fucking shot!”

Katsuki chest inflates with disbelief before it deflates again, and he’s rolling his eyes before he says, “That’s not—you fuckin’ know that’s not what I meant.”

“Oh really?” You laugh, and goddammit Katsuki, you just had to bring it up, didn’t you? “Because waking up after two months to your best friend telling you to give up doesn’t preserve your dignity at all, huh?”

“I didn’t tell you to fu—“

“You said those exact words, Katsuki. You said give up, and you left the hospital.”

The ash-blond has nothing to say to that, because he knows that you know you’re right, and trying to jedi mind trick you into believing he isn’t an asshole won’t work.

“Well you fuckin’ listened,” he grumbles, more to himself than you, but enough emotion flares in your core to make you want to scream.

“I didn’t have a choice,” you say, huffing, before turning your back to him, deeming this conversation over. “Good night, Katsuki.”

There’s a lull and it has you convinced you’ve won, finally relaxing (as much as you can) onto the cold floor. At least arguing heated your blood up a bit.

“The fuck do you mean?”

You roll your eyes even though they’re closed before you hop back onto your forearms to give the ash-blond a nasty look. “What?”

“You...said you didn’t have a choice,” Katsuki says, and it’s the first time you think you’ve heard him sound weary. Unsure. “The fuck does that mean?”

“It means I had to give up on being a hero either way.”

Which sucked. Because you had spent the past four years of your life working your ass off to save others, and you wind up out of commission before you even got started. You...suppose you didn’t tell Katsuki the whole story. Well, you hadn’t had a chance to—today’s the first time speaking with him since you woke up in the hospital.

Katsuki eyes you out of his peripheral, but only for a second. “And that means...?”

“It means that if I land on my spine the wrong way, there’s a high chance I’ll be paralyzed from the waist down.” You growl, frustrated that it was easier to coax the truth out of you than you thought.

The bullet buried close to your spinal column. You had to do PT for months, relearning how to walk as you slowly regain your motor functions. That’s when you started to bake.

“Oh.”

The howling of the wind turns from somewhat soothing to aggravating as Katsuki’s unimpressive “oh” hangs heavy in the air, and you find yourself sighing, the puzzle pieces finally clicking in your head. “Stop it.”

“Stop what?” Katsuki asks—he’s still not looking at you.

“Blaming yourself,” you gesture to his figure, which is lax with depression, lacking its sturdiness and usual fire. “You didn’t shoot the gun.”

Katsuki snorts at that, running a hand through his hair, “I might as well.”

“Stop.”

“You got shot because of me,” Katsuki says as if it were a fact. “They were trying to kill me. Not you.”

“And they didn’t kill me. I’m here and you’re here. If I hadn’t been there, you’d be six feet under right now,” you reason. Katsuki shrugs because he’s just as stubborn as you are, and you figure he’s been carrying around this baggage for too many years.

“Does your back hurt often?”

“No,” you shake your head. “I mean sure, I get flare-ups sometimes, but it’s not too bad. Doesn’t really get in the way of baking as long as the table is high enough.”

Katsuki thinks for a moment, teeth worrying his bottom lip. “Is the table high enough? At your café.”

You shrug, failing to see where he’s going with this. “I have a platform thingy, so. It’s mostly for decorating cakes and things—“

“I’ll buy you a new one.”

“What?”

“I’ll buy you a new table,” Katsuki says, nodding to himself as if he was confirming the idea. “A higher one.”

It takes a second for his offer to process, but once it does, you’re fighting a smile. Still the same kid. “Kats, I don’t nee—“

“An—And if you need a new chair. I’ll pay for that shit too.”

You shake your head—mainly in disbelief, “I don’t need a chair, Katsuki.”

“Then what?” He asks, and it almost sounds desperate with the speed he rushed the sentence, “Y’need a car? That hunk of junk you drive could use some work.”

You ignore the jab, because your car works perfectly fine thank you very much, and snort at the suggestion of such an outrageous purchase.

“What? You tryna be my sugar daddy or something?” You joke. Katsuki gives you a look, and it's dead serious.

“D’ya need one?”

“I—no!” You laugh, and have to remind yourself to reel it in before you actually wake Denki up. “I’m fine financially I just—what’s gotten into you?”

“Nothin’.” Katsuki quickly grumbles, facing forwards again. “I just...”

You raise an eyebrow, “You just..?”

“I dunno. I dunno,” Katsuki shakes his head. You let him gather his thoughts in silence before he tries again. He doesn’t.

“Then fuck me.”

In your defense, your mouth moved before you thought it through.

Katsuki has an unreadable look on his face, but his voice is anything but steady when he says, “What?”

Fuck. Fuck.

“U-Uh, I mean,” you recoil. Stupid big mouth. “I—you—don’t worry about it.”

“You said you wanted to fuck me,” Katsuki deadpans. You choke.

“I—no, that’s not—“

“That’s exactly what you said.”

“No, I meant as in I’m pent up. Obviously,” you defend with a huff, crossing your arms on the pillow as you glare daggers his way. Katsuki matches your stare.

“Not as pent up as a Pro Hero,” he scoffs, lifting an eyebrow. You take it as a challenge.

You click your tongue in faux pity, “Awe, the number two hero Dynamight doesn’t get laid?”

“No fuckin’ time,” he grunts, though you don’t find much remorse in his voice.

“Well, you have time now,” you say, completely unsure of where this confidence is coming from. Either way, you’ll take it and run.

“I do,” Katsuki confirms, leaning in closer. He’s close enough that you can smell what’s leftover of his cologne, and see the hint of a grin that makes his upper cheek shine silver in the moonlight. You find yourself leaning in just as much as he does.

“Wanna blow off some steam?” You dare to question. Katsuki’s grin only grows wider.

“Thought you’d never ask.”

Katsuki’s kisses are surprisingly soft, you think, and so are his lips. But you don’t have much time to think about it as he pulls you in by the waist, quietly groaning into your mouth while he lays you down on your back.

“Always thought you were the prettiest fuckin’ thing,” he growls, trailing butterfly kisses down your neck. “‘M gonna make it up to you, yeah? Make you feel so fuckin’ good.”

A hand hikes his sweatshirt above your chest before Katsuki’s latching onto the skin under your collarbone and sucking, teeth digging into your skin hard enough to bruise.

“Y-Yeah, that’s fine,” you whimper, intoxicated by the way Katsuki’s lips flush pink as he pulls away, eyes locked on the fresh hickey on your chest. They flicker up to you; he grins.

“Good?”

“Mhm.”

Katsuki hums at that, licking his lips before diving back in. You hiss when he bites too hard, prompting him to bite harder, but he always soothes it over with his tongue, topping each bruise with a kiss. You flinch when his lips wrap around your nipple and he chuckles at your meek whimper; a hand removes its grip on the sweatshirt in favor of sliding it up your thigh.

“Fuckin’ perfect,” Katsuki says once he pulls away, enjoying the sight of you writhing in anticipation. “And it’s all for me, ain’t it?”

“Yeah, ‘m all yours just—“ you kick a leg in frustration at the thumb playing with the hem of your panties, “—do something already.”

Katsuki raises an eyebrow, “Do what?”

You frown, huffing, “You know what.”

Katsuki shrugs, adjusting so he’s caging you to the floor. Ghosting a thumb over your panties, he says, “‘Course I do. You gotta ask nicely first.”

You tighten your hands into fists. He would.

“I’m no—“

“Beg, Princess,” Katsuki growls, his stare unwavering. He presses an inquisitive finger to your clit through your panties either as a promise or a threat—which, you’re not quite sure.

You crumble.

“I—fine, just—finger me.”

Katsuki doesn’t move. Asshole.

“Please.”

The ash-blond grins, finally pushing your panties to the side.

“Good girl.”

When Katsuki slides his first finger in, it’s much too easy, and you blame it on the foreplay. You shudder, hands moving to brace themselves on his big shoulders, and the ash-blond muffles a moan as your nails dig into his shoulders.

“Another,” you moan, bucking your hips into his palm. Katsuki’s heated gaze flickers from your body to your face.

“Already?” He chuckles, the rasp in his throat giving his arousal away. You nod—he clicks his tongue.

“Fuckin’ dirty.”

Two fingers feel like so much more than just one, and they have your eyebrows folding in a poor attempt to muffle a whimper. Katsuki’s fingers still move tentatively but they’re getting comfortable, curling and searching for that place that’ll make you tremble. And then he finds it.

“F-Fuck,” your body jolts, and Katsuki’s shushing you against the pillows.

“Keep your mouth shut, Princess,” he purrs, head dipping down to nip at your neck. It adjusts the angle ever so slightly, but enough to make you hiss, and he chuckles. “Unless you wanna get caught.”

“Oh yeah, because that sounds fun right now,” you snort towards the ceiling. Katsuki pulls away with an unimpressed look as his thumb comes down over your clit.

“Can’t wait to fuck the brat outta ya. Maybe then you’ll actually shut up for once, huh?” Katsuki inserts a third finger without you asking him to, and you gasp, clawing at his back.

“Shh, shh, shh,” he laughs against your mouth lowly, as if the light kisses will do anything but make more noise, “Good God sweetheart, you’re really pent up, aren’t ya?”

“Shit—I doubt you’re much better,” you try, scoffing at what you can see of his painfully hard cock in his sweatpants. Katsuki looks down before sending a huff your way, with a cute little blush dusted on his cheeks.

“Shut the fuck up,” he grunts, pulling out his fingers. You whine at the loss. “How d’ya want me to fuck you?”

You need to take a step back from how crude the question is. Right, sex.

“Right um,” you look around, trying to find the least obvious position—and one that doesn’t make a shit ton of noise. Laying on your side, you tuck an arm under the pillow, before turning around to Katsuki to suggest, “Cuddle-fucking?”

“Cuddle-fucking.”

“Yep,” you say with finality, popping the p. Making big grabby hands his way, you say, “C’mere, big guy.”

Katsuki rolls his eyes but moves behind you anyways, warm arms easily finding themselves around your waist under the blanket. After a few adjustments and ensuring you're both fully covered, Katsuki’s hard cock presses against your entrance as he hooks his head over your chin with a huff.

“This is so not on fuckin’ brand.”

“I don’t think fucking in a living room with sleeping friends is on-brand for a pro hero or a baker,” you say casually. Katsuki breaks out into a snort, pressing his face deeper into your neck.

“God, I fuckin’ missed you, ya know that?” He chortles. Your chest blooms with something it hasn’t in years, and for the first time, you find that you don’t mind.

“Don’t be such a dick and maybe I’ll stick around this time,” you quip with a smile he can’t see. Though you feel his against the base of your neck.

“Noted.”

Katsuki’s last words hang in the air, unusually heavy, and your eyes catch the snow beating against the window with a less than angry howl. Katsuki’s chest shudders against your back but he doesn’t move, hands frozen at your waist.

“Hey, I thought you were gon—“

“I’m getting to it,” Katsuki snaps, and you gasp as he starts to push inside. “So fuckin’ impatient, goddamn.”

He pulls you down until he fills you completely, and you suppress the urge to shout at the speed he did it with. Katsuki moves a hand to slap over your mouth.

“Shut the fuck up.”

You reach around to pinch him in the side with a huff, he calls you a bitch. It’s a little hard to hear you behind his hand as you say, “Then don’t catch me off guard like that, asshole.”

Katsuki snaps his hips and does exactly what you tell him not to do—prompting another surprised whine out of you and a dark chuckle from the ash-blond. His cheek presses into your jaw as he finds leverage in hiking your lower half up until your puffy cunt is level with his cock, and fucking you until you drool all over the pillow.

“What a pretty fuckin’ thing,” Katsuki grunts, and you can tell he struggles to keep quiet in the way his chest sporadically shudders. You have to grip the pillow for some semblance of purchase and Katsuki chuckles at watching you struggle, before he’s hiking your leg up to fuck you that much deeper.

“I always—always knew you’d sound so good,” he pants, the grip around your mouth bordering on clammy. You want to tell him that if he keeps making so much noise he’ll wake up everyone in this fucking room, but there isn’t much time between moans to get more than a word in. “Fuck baby, keep tightening around me like that, and I might fuckin’ cum.”

You find it amusing how close he is so quickly, until two fingers land on your clit and start rubbing in slow, small circles. Your walls flutter around him and Katsuki digs his teeth into your neck with a curse, his grip around your raised thigh contracting as he tries to hold on for as long as he can.

And that’s when Denki starts to move.

First, he rolls to the left. Which would’ve been fine, seeing as it’s in the opposite direction until he bops Eijirou straight on the nose and promptly rouses the redhead from his slumber. Katsuki’s hips still.

“O-Ow, dick,” Eijirou curses under his breath, quickly scrambling to his forearms. It’s hard to tell through the darkness, mostly because you’re squinting your eyes to feign sleep, but it seems like Eijirou rubs under his nose, only to blink back at a bloody hand.

“...Shit.”

Katsuki’s hips shift, ever so slightly, but enough to nestle his cock deeper and force you to bite back a whine. And another. And then another.

You try your hardest to be discreet when you reach to pinch Katsuki in the side, and he breathes a laugh down your neck.

“What?” He whispers, though it's more than a rasp than anything else. Good to know you’re not the only one struggling to not cum, here.

“You know 'what,'” you quickly hiss. But Katsuki’s hips don’t stop as Eijirou weighs his options to cure his bloody nose in the dark. The fingers on your clit return their usual pressure and you inhale sharply, nails digging into Katsuki’s forearm as your orgasm begins creeping up on you.

Eijirou sniffles and gets up, stumbling through the darkness to turn down the hall that leads to the bedrooms. Katsuki sees that as fucking freedom and his hips really start to pick up so much speed that you struggle to breathe through it all.

“‘M gonna cum,” Katsuki whimpers into your neck, burying his face deeper in a poor attempt to stunt any sound. “Fuck, fuck ‘m gonna cum, you close baby?”

“Y-Yeah jus’ a little more,” you whimper, eyes rolling as Katsuki finds some inhumane energy in him to fuck faster. He nods at that and bites into your shoulder with a growl, “C’mon, fuckin’ cream all over my cock—atta girl, fuck, fuck—“

Katsuki fills you up the moment you clench around his cock with a sigh, the weight of your orgasm knocking you forehead-first into your pillow as you bite the urge to squeal. Katsuki doesn't growl as much as you expect, moans breathy and light as his hips finally stutter to a stop—but you suppose some things have to change over the years.

Katsuki collapses next to you in pure exhaustion and you’re sure that’s his cum leaking down your thigh, but for some reason, you don’t really mind.

“Hey you,” he speaks first, eyes blazing red in the darkness. You snort.

“Hey, you.”

Katsuki chuckles with a stupidly giddy smile on his face, "Y'know, you still fuck really well."

You drop your head on his chest to snort, and his hands find their rightful place around your waist.

"Better than high school?"

"Yeah..." Katsuki grumbles, before his eyes narrow. "Wait—hey, yo—"

"I haven't fucked anyone since," you snuff the fire before it even starts, and Katsuki relaxes, though his eyes stay slim. He pulls you closer and you sigh—it's comfortable.

"Good," he grunts. And then after a pregnant silence: "I haven't either."

That's...strangely reassuring.

Your arms wriggle until they fold over his shoulders to play with the small hairs on the back of his neck, and he hums, eyes fluttering shut with a final peck on the lips. As Katsuki's breathing evens and the white of the snow dyes the highest points of his face white, you smile. He looks older.

You think he's asleep until he nudges your waist.

"Be my girlfriend."

You don't even hesitate.

"Okay."

By the time Eijirou comes stumbling down the hall, both you and Katsuki are passed out—with his body encompassing yours in the most intimate way, face tucked into your hickey-ridden neck as your arms and legs lock around his being. The redhead gives you both a soft smile as he passes, snorting to himself.

“Took them long enough.”

HAPPY BIRTHDAY THOTSUKI

[therealpussybangs]

When you find out the Haikyuu boys cheated.. Pt. 2

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Starring:    Timeskip!Aone, Goshiki, Kita, Lev                                                          

A/N- Tw: Cheating, crying, yelling, fighting, mentions of sexual-    intercourse, swearing, please let me know if i missed anything!!  

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Aone-

                Today was supposed to be your 4th year anniversary with your amazing boyfriend Aone. However, that date idea had quickly turned to shit when you see your boyfriend at a booth with some other chick.

You didn’t want to jump to conclusions, because you were exceptionally early to this date, so you walk over, hoping it was a sister or some other relative. 

But when you finally made it over to the table, your boyfriend looked like he had seen a ghost. Pale, scared, and he looked sick. The thing that hurt the most was the guilt swimming in his eyes. Eyes that were once only for you. Eyes that were always warm and welcoming, the eyes that felt like home. His once beautiful and bright eyes were now dulled, guilty and scared.

Aone felt like he couldn’t move. He was stuck in his chair when he saw you. 

‘Our date isn’t for another 20 minutes... how could this happen...?’ He thinks to himself. Then he remembers what you had said earlier about being early for the special today. He curses under his breath and opens his mouth to make excuses, but that’s when he hears a sniffle.

He reluctantly looks up to see you crying, and swiping at your eyes wildly. His heart shatters and sinks to the floor and he immediately knows he shouldn’t lie, it’ll only make it worse.

“Baby i’m so sorry....” He looks down, not ready to hear your reply.                     “Was i not good enough..? What should I have done differently..?” You say in a small, hurt voice.

“No! I-” He was cut off by the other girl sitting in front of him.

“Bubs who’s this ugly little girl? She a friend of yours? Or what..she kinda smells a little..” She says in a squeaky, bratty voice.

“Oh, haha; i’m actually his soon to be ex-girlfriend! So nice to meet you!! And so nice to leave you ‘bubs’!” You say with a fake smile, and filled with sarcasm. 

“Babe- do-” Aone started quietly, he always was so quiet and reserved. But he seemed so talkative with this new girl....

“By Aone! Bye bitch I don’t know!” You say oh so confidently, until you go to itch your eyes. ‘oh... tears..’ You began to cry harder as you realize you just left the one thing you loved most.

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Goshiki-

 You and Tsutomu had been pretty distant after a fight you two had, and you wanted to go over and apologize to him because you realized you were in the wrong. 

However, what you did not expect was to see another car parked outside of your shared home.

This fight you both had was because of some silly coworker jokingly hitting on you. You had known this person since you were little, so it was nothing new. They were also fully aware of the fact that you were in a committed relationship with Tsutomu. 

So, who could be at his house? Was he really hurt enough to call a friend or relative for help/advice? Now you felt really bad, so you quickly make your way up the steps to your shared home and push past the door. 

What you did not expect to hear, were muffled whimpers and Goshiki’s smooth, calming voice. ‘Wh-what?’ You think maybe it was something else, maybe it was Goshiki whimpering and sniffling and someone else sweet talking him. But once you walk into your bedroom....you shut down.

“B..baby,,?” You ask, voice small. You were shaking and trying your best to keep your cool and hold back the tears threatening to spill. “Whats going on..?”

Goshiki immediately whips his head around from where it was buried between someone elses thighs. But when he sees your hurt eyes and sad features guilt pools at the bottom of his stomach. He was with someone else, on your shared bed, in your shared home. This realization suddenly hit him like a brick, and he immediately shot straight up. “I-I can explain!!” 

“Explain what? The fact you were pleasuring some random whore on our bed?? What else is there to explain Tsut- Goshiki?” You yell back, the tears from before finally breaking the barrier and streaming down your face.

Goshiki just stood there, shaken up and regretful, not daring to say a word, knowing it will make things worse. But you persisted and asked him again why he did it and he started to get annoyed with your yelling. “I was angry with your stupid fucking co-worker for flirting with you and smacking your ass and always eating lunch with you!! I wanted you to know how it felt!!” He yelled back, without thinking. Bad idea.

You were speechless to say the least. He did not just compare cheating to harmless banter between friends...did he? He didn’t just call your absolute bestfriend stupid...did he?

“Get out. Both of you.” You say, your tone stone cold.

“What..” Your ex says, his voice small and shaky, almost as if it was any louder it would shatter you.

“GET OUT!! NOW!!” You say, now yelling as warm, fat tears stream down your face. You were furious, deflated, tired, and so, so done. You thought you were going to be sick. You had trusted him, and here he was, with a beautiful woman, probably 10x better than you. And to think you were going to apologize to him.

“Baby... we can fix this! right? Move forward!” He says, not so confident or angry this time.

“What, so you can go off with some other bitch as soon as the going gets tough again? No. We’re over. Goodbye Goshiki, please don’t try to contact me, i’ll have someone come get my stuff.”

And with that, you slammed the door and walked out of the place you one called home. 

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Kita-

Kita was a simple man. He wanted 2 things in life: A family with you, and his rice fields to do well.

However he did not take it very well when you said you were not ready for a family, and he stormed out on you. That night you cried yourself to sleep, thinking about how you could be better.

The past month and a half, you and Kita have been pretty distant, and you have been preparing yourself for a family in any way you can. For example: Finishing the last of your extra studies, learning how to make extra delicious meals, even though Kita wasn’t ever there to try them, and you even started looking into parenting books. You just wanted to be the perfect wife for him.

So one day you waited for him to come home, ready to tell him the big news; you were ready to start a family. So when he finally got back, you told him!

“Babe! I think i’m ready for a family! With you!” You said happily and confidently. But when you saw his eyes widen in surprise, you didn’t expect them to also be oh so regretful.

“Y-you are..?” He asks, suddenly shaking. His stomach drops to the floor while his heart breaks simultaneously. You... you prepared yourself all on your own, just for him. And he knows he fucked up, getting some other girl pregnant, but he was so angry and sad he just.... it just... happened.

Just then, he gets a call, from the one person he really did not want to talk to. The other woman he got pregnant. He was so scared to pick up the phone, so you did. He froze. ‘No..! You cant pick that up...it will ruin us..’

“Hey! Shin! The baby just kicked! I hope its a girl.... Shin..?” The girl says on the other end, happy and excited.

“wh..what?” You say, confused. “Who are you..?”

“I’m his girlfriend! Who are you silly?” She says, still bubbly.

“I-” You start, and then hang up. It could not be. He did not get another woman pregnant, he was your baby, no one else...right? You slowly look over to Kita, hoping you didn’t just hear what you think you did.

He looks down, guilt and shame washing over his built figure.

“I’m so sorry... it wasn’t supposed to happen, but it did and I can’t just leave her by herself..” He says, voice gradually getting louder.

“So.. you couldn’t just wait a little longer huh...it’s okay, I hope you two will be happy.” You walked away after that, and just then was when Kita realized he was loosing you. He panicked, and reached out for your hand, but you were already gone, into the bedroom you both shared, presumably packing.

But it’s when he sees you walk out the door, tears streaming down your face, and sobs wracking you body, that reality finally shifted. You were leaving, and he was now responsible for a child that wasn’t yours. He was mortified to say  the least.

“Bye Shin, i’ll always love you y’know.. I hope your child is as beautiful as you.”

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Lev-

Today was your birthday! And you were so excited to spend it with your beanpole boyfriend! But he hadn’t answered your texts yet, and your calls either. You understood he had a photo-shoot, but it was over hours ago, even his manager didn’t know where he was. So you decided to check his snapmap because you were genuinely worried??

But when you saw his bitmoji at an unrecognized address, you freaked out and drove there immediately.

When you got there, his car was parked in the driveway, and the lights were on inside. You could also hear the faint hum of soft music. 

Lev was always so gentle with you, and he never raised hid voice or got angry with you. You loved that about him, how soft he was. When you guys first met, he was willing to take things slow, and wait until you were both comfortable with eachother. 

He was always so patient, or so you thought. You weren’t ready for anything intimate other than kissing, and he said he was okay with that. But horny men will be horny men. 

But you at least thought he could wait a little longer for you, his girlfriend of 11 months. At least those were the thoughts that flew through your head as you walked into the mystery house.

It was Lev, laid out on a bed with silk sheets, rose petals scattered everywhere, and Champaign on the nightstand next to him. 

Well, more like next to the other woman in bed with him, dressed in red lacy lingerie and pretty makeup. The candle-light makes them both look so majestic, well they would if they both didn’t have shocked/guilty expressions on their faces. 

Lev got up immediately and tried to grab your arm, but you shrugged him off.

“I trusted you, and I loved you, I still love you! But here you are, with another woman, on my birthday. Happy fucking birthday to me i guess.”

He stood there dumbfounded as you walked out, your confident facade breaking as tears slip down your rosy cheeks. Then, you drive away, knowing things will never be the same...

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Annnnnd it’s finally out! Not proofread i’m sorry </3 Kita’s hurt the most smh

ALSOOOO don’t forget you are fucking gorgeous and ilysm pls take care of your gorgeous self!

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[fictionsmooches]

PORCO X READER X PIECK

Plot: after a small fight with Porco, Pieck helps (y/n) get Porco jealous, while also having fun with her.

Contains: sweating, degradation, Praia, name calling ‘slut’ whore’ ect.ect., oral sex, unprotected sex, thigh riding, lesbian sex, 18+ MDNI

Word count; 3k-ish

Classes had already been out for the day, and with a long weekend around the corner, you were more than ready to get this ‘Porco issue” sorted out. Your whole life felt like it was spent between Pieck and Porco. You three had formed a bond unlike any other. You shared secrets, hopes, and protected each other on and off the battlefield.

“Look (y/n), a small fire lit under his ass wouldn’t hurt him. Besides, he’s been awfully rude to me lately. I wouldn’t mind making him a little jealous myself.” Pieck said.

All week he had been acting funny towards you. A little too funny for your comfort. It all started when you and Pieck decided to hang out without Porco. He had been taking extra lesions from Zeke as of lately, so he wouldn’t come home until late. The dorms were too quiet to be alone. Your thoughts had rang too loud to be left alone with quiet ticks of clocks to keep you company.

Pieck had no roommate since Annie left for Paradis, so you decided to have a sleepover. The two of you spent the night swapping stories of the week and laughing over nothing. It was a well needed pleasant night. However, In the morning when you arrived home you could see the hurt all over Porco’s face. He was sitting up on his bed. He faced the door. Dark circles rimmed his eyes, you knew for a fact he didn’t sleep at all last night.

“Where were you? You know you worried me to death!” he yelled standing up. His loud tone took over the whole room. It was as if nothing else existed apart from you two in this room.

“Oh I'm sorry Pock.. I don’t mean to worry you. I just got lonely waiting here for you to come back so I had a sleepover with Pieck.” you spoke softly as if to sooth him. You really didn't mean to make him worry, that was the last thing you wanted.

“Well the least you could have done was left a note.” he said brushing passed you as he walked through the still open door. His voice was cold and numb. You hated seeing this side of Porco, the cold side of him.

You could deal with his anger outbursts, you could manage the yelling or the cursing when he was upset. You could at least talk him down from that, but you can't help him when he was like this. How could you help somebody who didn't feel nothing? This was the first time he ever acted like this towards you, and it felt horrible.

Sure he yelled at Reiner and even got too snappy with Pieck every now and again- but not you. He made a habit of bragging to everyone that you’d be his wife one day and how beautiful you were whenever you weren’t around. You knew Porco was smitten for you but he never acted on it.

You waited all year for Porco to make the first move but feared he never would. Maybe it was because he wanted to live up to Marcel’s legacy. Maybe he didn’t want to ruin the friendship between you and Pieck. But it looked as though he’d never act on those feelings now.

“Pieck.. what if he never talks to me again?” you spoke as you slipped down onto Pieck’s lap. Her skirt was damp with the tears you’d been crying all day.

“I highly doubt that. You just have to show him that if he doesn’t act fast, he’ll lose you.”

You nodded and sat up. You wiped your last tear away and raised your fist.

“Ok. What’s the plan?”

Pieck slipped her arm around your waist and pulled you closer. Your thighs now touched one another as she closed in the gap between you two. She cupped her free hand over your ear, she whispered softly.

“You want me to do what?! Pieck, we aren’t little girls anymore! We can’t just ‘practice’ like we did when we were little!” you jumped slightly. She pulled you back into her grasp.

“And why not! Am I not your type?” Pieck teased.

“It’s not that” you looked away. “It’s just.. I don’t know.. Embarrassing?”

Pieck couldn’t help but giggle at your shyness. It is true that you two used to practice kissing each other when you were children. You needed to be sure that when the time came, and you married your future spouse, you’d be ready. But you were not children anymore. You couldn’t just kiss her and act like it meant nothing. After all, you had some morals left.

Sure Porco and Pieck fought about who would be the one to marry you- but you never thought anything of it. Why would you? Wasn't it natural to hold hands with your best friends? Your mind ticked and ticked until finally you could form a coherent thought. Was Pieck in love with you? And was Porco as well? How long had they been? Either way, the idea of kissing Pieck didn’t seem so far-fetched anymore.

You could hear Porcos boots clomping in the distance, he had always been so brash with his walking. You often felt bad for the poor wood floors he had walked on.

Just as the door knob turned, Pieck cupped your face and pressed her lips against yours. As soon you were connected, you could feel yourself pooling under your skirt. Pieck had begun rubbing on your thigh, and that definitely didn't help the dampness from collecting. The warmth of her mouth took over your whole body. You couldn’t help but melt into the kiss, your mouth opened slightly as Pieck shoved her tongue into yours.

You knew Porco could walk in at any moment, and the excitement of him catching you made you want to kiss Pieck even more. It felt so dirty to be like this. To have Pieck’s hand up your skirt, and to have Porco possibly see. you wouldn't dream of pulling away. It felt too good to stop now.

The moment the door actually opened, Porco just stood there- eyes wide as he watched Pieck absolutely degrade the mouth he wanted for himself. He had dreamed about parting those lips countless times. He tried to imagine if your mouth felt as good as it did in his wet dreams. His now half hard cock twitched as he watched Pieck pull away from you, a string of saliva still connecting you two.

“Good evening Pock.” she spoke with a smile as if nothing just happened.

He avoided his gaze from the two of you. “Yeah.. whatever” he said, nearly throwing his books on his desk. He took a seat as he covered his face- hoping it would make his blush less noticeable.

Pieck kissed your forehead. “I’ll see you later my sweet (y/n), i’ll be late to class.” she said walking out of your dorm with a wink. You sat breathless at what had just happened. Pieck had unlocked something so sinister in you, and you feared that simple kissing wouldn't be enough for you anymore.

As time went on you wouldnt understand how Pieck could just go along with you like nothing happened. You walked to class together as usual, ate lunch like you usually would- but in the back of your mind the only thing you could think about was Pieck. You craved her touch on your body. You longed for her hands and for her mouth, but you wanted Porco’s gaze upon you just as much.

“Uhh Earth to (y/n)?” Pieck said waving her hand in front of you. You had spaced out at the table you had been studying at. Porco sat at your left and Pieck across from you.

“I’m sorry. I just got lost in thought!” You rubbed the back of your head In embarrassment.

The stuffy room you sat in, had once been dedicated to strategizing wars and battles but the campus had now converted them into study halls for students. You weren’t sure if the weather made the room feel humid or if you had imagined it to distract yourself from forming tension between you three.

Large windows covered the walls of the room, the sunlight coming in gave you a clear view of everything in the room. The tables were old and worn, chairs wobbled ever so slightly, and the books on the shelf were slowly collecting dust as years went by.

“Is it hot in here?” You ask aloud, fanning yourself with your hand.

“I’m sure it is, and these uniforms don’t help out any.” Pieck smiled was she pulled her book away from her face.

Porco slid his hand on your thigh from under the table, he snickered as he turned the page of his book with his other hand.

You gulped quietly.

“Yeah I’m getting tired of all these layers, I wish I could peel off a few, don’t you Pieck?”  Porco said as his hand gilded under your skirt, calloused hands rubbed small circles on your inner thighs. You were being too obvious, you had always been too obvious.

Pieck caught on quickly to the soft movements Porco made under the table and your breath heaving. Her eyes made their way to your warm cheeks with a smirk.

“I understand completely, Porco.” Pieck looked directly in your eyes “It’s almost like I could undress entirely right now.” she began fiddling with the top buttons of her shirt.

You could feel it happening again. The wetness starting to build between your legs was unbearable.

You were practically gasping for air as Porco’s hand slowly started making its way closer and closer to your clothed cunt. Your clit ached with the thought of his touch. All sense of shame was gone at this point. Pieck’s shirt was half way opened at this point. The bits of her lace bra were exposed more and more with every bottom she slowly undid.

You couldn’t tell if your arousal came more from Piecks undressing or from Porcos touch, but at this point it didn't matter, you only knew you needed more. You wished to be laid against Pieck’s chest as Porco bent you over the wooden table, just imagining it made you bucked your hips in desperation for more friction. Porco slowly placed the pad of his middle and ring finger against your clit.

He withdrew his hand entirely as you let out a soft moan.

“It’s almost time for dinner, we gotta get going if we want to beat the crowd.” Porco said, looking at the clock on the wall.

“Right! Best if we leave now.” Pieck said with a devilish smile as she began buttoning up her shirt.

The two left you there panting for air, and longing for hands all over your body. The light of golden hour stained the room with warm hues. Your mind raced with what had just happened, and why you were left hot and bothered. Your legs spread open on the chair you had been sitting it, a small puddle laid under you.

The next day You woke to an empty dorm. Porco had been long gone at training. You knew you would have most of the day to yourself but today your mind raced with thought of Pieck and Porco. At times you shifted your weight to distract yourself from the overwhelming thoughts you craved.

It wasn’t long before a knock at the door sent a shiver up your spine that jolted you to sit up.

“(Y/N)?” Pieck called as she let herself in. “I assume Porcos is training?”

You nodded.

“Ooh so you’re all alone?” Pieck’s tone sounded sultry like she was alluding to something. You felt the heat rising in your face.

She made her way over to your bed. Her foot steps echoed in the room with every step she took. She took a seat on your bed. And leaned over to your ear.

“Have you been thinking of me?”

You avoided looking at her. “Maybe” you answered

“Or have you been thinking of Porco?” She asks nibbling at your ear lobe. Your breath couldn’t help but deepen.

“Maybe” you answer again

Pieck pulled away and repositioned herself. She was now sitting with her back fully against the wall, her legs laid out over the length of the bed.

“Come here (y/n). I want you to show me the way you want to grind on Porcos lap” she lifted her skirt to expose her thighs. She looked so soft from where you sat.

You don’t think twice about straddling her thigh. Your clothed cunt made contact with her soft skin sending a shiver down your spine. Piecks hand found their place on your ass with a squeeze.

“Such a desperate little whore you’ve become. You get one kiss from me and a half assed teasing from Porco, and you’re so eager to do as I say?” She squeezed your ass again only this time more rougher.

You could only moan in response.

Pieck had begun dragging you back and forth on her thigh, pleasure rippled through your body.

“Unbutton your shirt for me”

You hesitated. “What if Porco comes back early?” You whined

“Don’t act like you don’t want him to see you like this. Now unbutton your shirt”

She lifted her leg to make more friction between you and her thigh.

You did as you were told and undid every button to the best of your ability given the circumstances.

“No bra? You really are a whore (y/n)!”

You moaned at her words, your pussy was leaking all over her thigh as you rode her.

Pieck placed your nipple in her mouth and began to suck.

“Fuck-!” You say throwing your head back

She slapped your ass making you moan louder.

Her mouth felt amazing wrapped around the sensitive bud, sending shockwaves through your entire body.

She looked up at you through her eyelashes. She looked as though she was smiling as she sucked on your nipple, she knew what she was doing.

The knot in your stomach had started to tighten.

“Pieck! You’re going to make me cum!”

She pulled away. Without saying anything, she pulled your panties to the side, giving your cunt direct contact with her.

“Cum for me then” she said looking in your eyes.

Your hips moved at a rapid pace as you released on her thigh with a scream.

You were so busy with Pieck that you didn’t even notice Porcos boots clomping down the hallway. By the time you noticed he was already opening the door.

He stepped into the most unexpected but beautiful sight. You say still straddling Piecks thigh, gasping with your tits out. Your cum and sweat covered your body and Piecked thigh, your skirt hiked up over your ass and piecks hands holding on the back of your thighs.

Pieck peered her head to the side “hi Pock!”

You couldn’t help but feel so embarrassed and exposed.

Porcos cock twitched with excitement.

“So this is what you do while I’m off working my ass off?” He says while slicking his hair back more.

You were speechless. When you decided to speak all you could manage to say was “I’m sorry- I couldn’t help myself! I just-“

“Just what? Decided to act like a slut and think I wouldn’t find out?” Porco says.

Your clit jumped with excitement.

Pieck shifted her weight so you lay elbows to the bed with your ass in the air. Pieck guided her hands to your panties and slid them off of you. She spread your ass cheeks and pussy lips for Porcos full view.

“Look Porco, she’s just begging to be filled” Pieck smiled up at you.

You could hear Porco’s zipper being undone behind you.

“She sure is. But I want to hear that from her” he grinned, stroking his cock. The tip was wet with precum already. He stroked as your hole fluttered with excitement.

“Please Porco! Please, I need it!” You said.

“Tell me princess, what do you need?”

Pieck reached her hand underneath to rub your clit.

You gasp nearly being able to talk, “I need you to fuck me Porco! Please fuck me!” You choke out.

“Good girl” he said as he slowly pushed the tip of his hard cock inside. “Mmm.. so fucking wet already” he shoved the enteier length inside you.

You moaned against piecks mouth as she kissed you. Her tongue once again shoving its way into your mouth.

While Porco took his time fucking your tight hole, you slid lower to make contact with Pieck’s lower half. She giggled at the sight of you being so eager to please her. “Here, ill help you.” She said lowering her panties.

You wasted no time lapping up every once of Piecks oozing pussy. She collapsed into the this matress as you attacked her clit.

Piecks moaning caught the attention of Porco. “L-Like what you see Pock? Her mouth feels amazing on my pussy.” Pieck said, smirking.

“I always knew (y/n) would be the perfect little slut.” Porco said speeding up his thrust into your sloppy tight cunt. You moaned against Piecks clit, squeezing down on Porco’s cock in response to his degrading words.

Slowly you added two fingers into Piecks slit.  “Better do a good job (y/n), or I wont let you cum” Porco said slowing his pace. You wasted no time proving at her g-spot. Pieck moaned in delight.

“Good girl.” Pieck said in between moans.

You couldn’t go on much long like this. You needed release and you needed it bad. Porco could tell you where close by the way you began clamping down on his cock.

Pieck was the first to cum as she held a fist full of your hair “(y/n)! You’re gunna make me cum” she exclaimed. She lay breathless on the bed for a moment as Porco kept thrusting into you.

Pieck seized the opportunity to reach under and rub your clit. Pieck’s soft fingertips where enough to send you over the edge. “Porco! I’m coming!” You screamed.

“I’m close (y/n).. where do you want me to finish?” He choked

“Don’t be shy now (y/n) Answer him” Pieck said.

“Inside!” You yelled feeling over stimulated.

“Fuck!” Porco said as he raised inside of you, your pussy drank up every drop of his cum.

You three laid squished against one another, sweat and cum covering your bodies