#i'll try throwing it in in future chapters but he definitely will call them out after they find out his identity

[paimonial-rage]

Ekolu! Can I get some quick drabbles or headcannons for how Ayato, Xiao, and Venti react when a reader calls them out for doing something dumb/mean? I mean, I’m an idiot and a hothead on the best of days, but I still want to (have the confidence to) call out others.

Like, Ayato… you shouldn’t just send Thoma gross concoctions. At least ASK if he’s curious about it first.

Xiao could you maybe please hold up instead of just disappearing?! Like, at least give us a chance to say hi!

Venti… maybe performing on a rooftop surrounded by the creatures you’re allergic to is a BAD idea.

Heck, I don’t even mind if they react negatively. I love how you portray Zhongli reacting to things and I want more.

Um anon, no offense, but how are you able to speak to the very depths of my heart? I honestly adore this idea. We must have something in common because we are both hot-headed idiots. I think our archetype needs to be represented more in the genshin x reader community. No more doormats and gushy lovey-dovey relationships. We need an temperamental dumbass revolution. All them characters are morosexual anyway. uwu <3

No but seriously, I'm excited to try this out. I'll do my very best! I struggle a lot with trying to figure out how to characterize the characters properly, so honestly knowing you like my rendition of Zhongli makes me very happy!! I'm gonna get started tonight. I may throw in a few other characters too if I get the inspiration. :D

[nickfowlerrr]

I’m still not over pwyc🥺 their dynamic is just 🤌🏻😚 I just want to keep reading about these two and whatever they are up to…. Who do you think apologies first after a fight and what are their arguments like. I’m pretty sure bucky is a lot softer and mellow now with her but does he ever loose his cool and regret it later☠️🤧

i’m sorry it’s taken so long to respond to this! but i'm so glad you've enjoyed pwyc!! thank you for sending this in! (also just so you know, i'm on my laptop or else i would've used at least four or five emojis by now)

regrets

pretty when you cry series masterlist

pairing: pwyc!bucky x curvy!reader

warnings: idk..tears?

words: no idea. not that many.

notes: does any of this make sense? idk. genuinely no clue where it came from lol but enjoy the drabble <3 also! this is not proofread in the slightest so sorry in advance for any errors.

I'd say Bucky definitely apologizes first a good 85% of the time and she apologizes first the other 15%. In my mind, reader will only apologize first if she believes she started an argument unnecessarily or if she thinks she reacted unfairly.

When they argue it's normally nothing serious, they just go back and forth a lot with their banter about stupid stuff lol. If they do have a serious argument, it's probably about their future. Reader not feeling comfortable or ready to meet his family or introduce him to her own, for example.

She knows it'll happen eventually, whether she wants to or not, but as of right now, it's a point of contention.

I don't know what would make Bucky lose his cool after everything they've been through and how insanely obsessed, he is with her. it'd have to be something that would make him feel really insecure like something that would make him doubt her wanting to be with him. Let's say she goes out late and doesn't answer when he calls or texts, or she leaves somewhere without telling him - I think that would trigger his abandonment issues and cause a fight for sure. Whether he realizes it or not, I think he does, he's terrified of losing her.

I don't know that she'd ever purposely try and hurt him like that since the realization she came to in the last few chapters of the series, and I definitely think he's gotten more secure in their connection since then, but if anything would make him lose his cool, I think it'd be him getting scared she was leaving for good.

That would probably either upset reader because he would think she'd do that now, and anything that would rehash the dark times in their story for sure would be painful and cause a lot of issues for them. It might go something like this:

"You left?" he accused the moment you answered his call.

"I'm not gone, I'll be back," you responded with a small chuckle at his words.

"You didn't think to tell me?" he questioned harshly.

"It's not a big deal, Buck,"

"The hell it's not," he stormed.

"You need to calm down," you said, growing agitated at his attitude.

"Don't fucking tell me to calm down, as if I have no reason not to trust you,"

"Are you being serious right now?" you scoffed.

"Does it sound like I'm laughing?"

"You know damn well why I tried to leave back then. Don't accuse me of doing something you know I'm not fucking doing," you whisper yelled as you walked to your car, passing a couple as you went.

"You need to tell me where you're going and when,"

"Oh fuck off, you don't get to dictate when I can and can't go somewhere. You don't own me, I'm my own person,"

"This has nothing to do with being your own person, it has to do with me coming home expecting you to be here and finding you gone without a goddamn trace. What the fuck am I supposed to think, huh?"

"Maybe you could try taking a minute to check my location, which I know for a fact you have, instead of being paranoid and going to your worst case scenario," you shot back as you got into your car, throwing your purse down on the passenger seat.

"You can't get mad at me for being worried about you,"

"That's just it, Bucky. You know I'm fine, you can feel it. So don't try and spin this to put it on me. You weren't worried about me, you were worried I left. And yeah, it pisses me off you'd think that. After everything. You wanna talk about trust?" you asked incredulously.

He knew he fucked up when he said it. He didn't think he was entirely wrong in his worries, but he shouldn't have thrown that out there. He did trust you. He was just..scared. Fear always had him acting like the worst version of himself. He shouldn't have called you so accusatory. he knew you were fine, but when he realized you weren't home, he wasn't. Memories of you leaving, or trying to anyway, resurfaced and sent him sick, his stomach dropping and a sense of panic rearing its head at your unexplained absence. Even still, you didn't deserve his hostility.

"I don't wanna fight with you," he conceeded.

"Wonder why," you snarked before taking a breath. "I'll be home soon," you said before ending the call.

----------------------

"I'm sorry," were the first words you heard when you opened the door, looking over to see a pitiful Bucky sitting at the bottom of the stairs where he had been waiting for you. You exhaled deeply, sighing as he stood and walked to you. "You were gone, and you - you never leave without telling me where you're going. I just- I lost it a bit. I shouldn't have called you the way I did, I'm sorry."

"I didn't think you'd get home before me or I would've told you I was out. I just hate that that was your first thought, that you could think I'd do that to you. Because I wouldn't. I mean, before, when we first.." you trailed off, "I would have before. But things are different now, they've been different, we're different. Better, I thought,"

"They are, we are," he agreed, taking your hands in his. "I'm sorry. I got scared," he admitted aloud. "And I let it get the best of me. I wasn't thinking. I trust you and I love you with everything I have, heart and soul," he said as he leaned down to press his forehead against yours. "You're everything to me. The thought of losing you," he shook his head. "You have no idea what you do to me," he breathed against your lips.

"If I was gonna leave, I would've done it already. It's you and me, no matter what.. I mean this soulmate thing, it's forever, right?" you quipped, a small smile on your lips, "'M not goin' anywhere."

When you looked to meet his eye, you were taken aback by the tears in them, your hands immediately going to cup his face.

"Babe," you cooed gently, thumbs stroking his cheeks. The sound of your voice so soft and concerned had him wrapping his arms around you and burying his face in your neck, your own arms winding around him in return. After a moment, you pulled away and grabbed his hand, leading him to the couch. You kicked off your shoes and laid down, pulling him along with you so he was laying comfortably on you with his head on your chest as you played with his hair.

You could practically feel the tension slipping from him as he melted into you.

"I really am sorry," he said again.

"I know," you whispered in response. "It's okay."

There was a brief, comfortable silence between you before you spoke again.

"You know I love you, right?" you breathed.

"You don't really have a choice, though, do you?"

Your heart clenched at his somber response. That was all you. You recalled those words you'd thrown at him over and over again during those first few weeks. It wasn't a lie. You didn't have a choice, neither of you did. But you meant it as a jab and he obviously still reflected on the pain of it. Your nose started tingling as you felt your eyes welling. You swallowed thickly.

"No.. I guess I don't," you took a moment. "You have to know, when I said that, I was hurt. And confused and angry," you cleared your throat, not wanting to bring up the past again. "But with you, right here and now, with this Bucky, I've never felt so protected, cherished... loved in my life. And I mean it, I'd chose you a thousand times over if I could," you finished, trying not to choke as your throat tightened.

You held him against your chest, cuddling him close, wanting to bring him the same comfort he so easily provided to you. Assure him of your feelings. When he finally looked up, his blue eyes were gleaming beautifully. He lifted himself up so he was hovering over you, holding your gaze.

"In every lifetime," he said softly. You nodded lightly, a small smile on your face before he leaned back down to kiss you gently. It was soft and sweet before he pulled away slightly, his lips brushing yours as he spoke, "It's always you."

Bucky lowered himself back down into the comfort of your embrace, your presence just as soothing to him as his was to you. As you cuddled into one another, you couldn't help but whisper out a delicate apology.

"I'm sorry I hurt you," you breathed. He squeezed you, rolling onto his side and pulling you to do the same, both of you now chest to chest, nuzzling into each other.

"I hurt you first," he responded, anguish clear in his voice.

Another beat of silence.

"I'd rather you hurt me in every lifetime than ever have to live one without you. I don't deserve you. But I love you so much. I'm sorry I hurt you, I hate that I did. Might never be enough, but I'll spend every day of the rest of my life trying to make it up to you."

You pondered his words and wanted to ask him the one question running through your mind. If not hurting me meant never having met me, never getting to know me, to have me, to love me...would you choose that? You decided you didn't want to know his answer. It would hurt some either way. No point in considered hypotheticals. You both had regrets, some bigger than others. But you had to live with them now, the only thing you could do was apologize and try to make up for them however you could, whenever you could. You didn't have to dwell on them, you just had to acknowledge their existence when they popped up like they did today. Deal with them, work through them. Together. There was no way to rewrite history, but you got to decide what the future chapters would hold.

You decided you didn't want any more regrets in your book.

[jj-babebank]

Camp Willowdale / JJ Maybank AU / PART 2

Synopsis: Camp Willowdale is buzzing with new campers. It’s Caroline Windsor’s first year as a camp counsellor after attending the camp as a camper for ten years. Little does she know that this year Willowdale Lake is going to be a little different from what she is used to it being…

Warnings: future chapters may include curse words, mentions of drugs, mentions of alcohol, mentions of sexual activities, mentions of death.

Pairings: JJ Maybank x fem OC

Part 1 can be found here. xxx

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Part 2 -

Lunch was over and Pricilla organised the boys to go set up the objects for tomorrow night's scavenger hunt around the camp grounds. The boys had drawn the groups their pairs would be in charge of before leaving and JJ and Caroline had gotten Teens 2, whereas Sarah and John B had gotten Teens 1, which meant that, for better or worse, their groups would be partaking in a lot of activities together, seeing as they were both in the same age group.

The girls were given the job to set up the seating area where the bonfire was going to be, so Sarah and Caroline stuck together as they made their way towards the clearance where it was going to be held.

"Can you believe I got paired up with JJ Maybank?" Caroline sighed.

"Beats Routledge by a thousand, I can promise you that," said Sarah, still extremely disappointed, "At least Maybank looks like he takes care of himself."

Caroline chuckled at her comment. John B had also grown his hair out over the years and it was now down to his shoulders.

"He does seem like he is... in touch with nature," Caroline remarked and Sarah laughed genuinely for the first time since drawing the boy’s name out, "Maybe they won't be that bad to work with, besides, it's only nine weeks, what could go wrong?"

Sarah seemed to think for a second before her lips curled into a devious smirk, "Hey, didn't you used to have, like, the biggest crush on Maybank?"

Caroline's cheeks turned red immediately, "I don't know what you're talking about," she mumbled quickly.

Sarah started laughing, "You totally did! You lucky, lucky bitch! I wish I got paired up with my childhood crush! Instead I get to spend my last summer before moving away with snot-nosed, bug-eating Routledge... Why was the Universe on your side and not on mine?"

They walked behind the rest of the girl counsellors towards the bonfire area. When they arrived, the logs that Pricilla had informed them would be stacked up in a convenient for them to move around way, were all scattered across the ground. The pillows that were meant to go on top of them were also in disarray. All the girls looked around in confusion.

"Surely this couldn't have been the wind?" one of them said.

"Surely this was the boys." said Sarah matter-of-factly, "I'd bet 50 bucks that Routledge had something to do with this."

All the girls turned to look at her in confusion.

"What?" she protested, shrugging her shoulders, "You know I'm right."

Caroline rolled her eyes, "Boys or not, we better sort this mess out before sundown, we have cabins to set up as well."

The girls agreed, Sarah being skeptical but also finally giving in, and little by little, they set up the bonfire area. It took them a little over two hours before they started making their way back to the cabins, which they were supposed to decorate with welcome signs for the arriving campers.

Since Sarah and Caroline were both in charge of the oldest groups, their campers were meant to be sharing two cabins - one for the boys and one for the girls.

"Let's split up, I'll do the boys and you do the girls," Sarah offered, nearly shocking Caroline, "Try being as quick as you can. Meet me back out here in 15 minutes tops." she ordered before scurrying up the steps into the boys’ cabin.

Caroline rushed into the cabin next door, pleasantly surprised by Sarah's sudden determination to get work done. As she was arranging the banners and posters on the walls and ceiling, she couldn't help but think that Sarah must have had some sort of ulterior motive to being this enthusiastic about working. Sure enough, she was right.

She had barely taken a step out of the girls' cabin when Sarah spoke up, "Took you long enough. Now let's go find those stupid guys."

The sun was setting and the woods had gotten a bit chilly as Sarah lead Caroline towards where the male counsellors were supposed to be. After setting up the scavenger hunt objects, they were supposed to set up the archery area. As they were getting closer to the archery grounds, the two girls could hear the laughter of the boys in the nearby distance. Sarah pretended to gag yet again.

"Quick, around here," Caroline pulled Sarah behind the small hut where they kept all of the camp's archery supplies. From their spot they could see the guys quite clearly and could hear everything they were saying, "Remind me again why we're doing this?" Caroline whisper-yelled at Sarah.

"Because I'm still furious about their little prank," Sarah explained, "Which is why I want to prank them back."

"How are we gonna do that exactly?" asked Caroline, "By eavesdropping?"

"A good villain is one that knows the enemy's weaknesses," said Sarah, "First we listen for a bit, and then we make a plan."

Caroline couldn't help but smirk at this new side of Sarah she was seeing. She much preferred this Sarah to the constantly whining, gloating Sarah she had gotten used to over the years. Plus, being somewhat of a daredevil herself, Caroline couldn't help but find the idea of pranking the boys back exciting.

"Can you believe I got paired with Jenna Kinley?" one of the boys, Kelce, said, "Not only are we supposed to work together, but we're also meant to be taking care of babies..." he face palmed himself.

The other boys laughed.

"C'mon, Johnson, 10 year olds are hardly babies," said another one of the boys, Topper, "Besides, working with Kinley will not be nearly as scandalous as working with Hague!"

JJ spoke up next, "Aw, don't be like that, Top," he said, "Madison's not that bad!"

Topper scoffed at JJ, "Easy for you to say! You and Routledge got paired with the best girls out of the bunch! And you got the teens groups!"

Sarah and Caroline smirked at the remark.

"Boys, boys, boys," came John B's voice suddenly, "Let's put this topic behind us, I'm sure you'll all be glad to hear about what I managed to sneak into our cabin." all the boys were now staring at John B in anticipation, "16 bottles of pure, fine whiskey, m'boys. Safe to say, tonight will be a ball."

"Bingo..." Sarah and Caroline smiled mischievously at each other, the perfect prank idea forming in both of their heads.

They quietly made their way back to where all the cabins were and sat at one of the patios.

"So here's the plan," said Sarah, "We sneak into their cabin, raid Routledge's luggage and steal his bottles of whiskey. Let's go now!"

Caroline stopped her, "No, no, not now!" she hissed, "They're gonna go to their cabin before dinner and Routledge's gonna want to show them his stash! We'll sneak out during dinner. Oh, and, I suggest we throw a party of our own to this occasion."

Sarah smirked at Caroline, "I like where you're going with this, Carrie," she said, patting Caroline's shoulder before standing up to go into their cabin, "Not bad for a nerd."

Caroline sighed, there was the old Sarah again.

~~~~~~~~

“Windsor!” Caroline heard a voice behind her call out, “Been paired up for a whole day now and we still haven’t the chance to talk!”

Caroline turned around to find a beaming JJ smiling at her. Had he come over from the boys table specifically for her? She could feel her cheeks beginning to burn slightly.

“We can talk,” she said quickly.

JJ took a seat next to her on the long bench. She could feel the heat in her cheeks become even hotter. JJ didn’t seem to notice her nervousness, or awkwardness.

“How’s life been then?” he asked.

Caroline took a deep breath to soothe her nerves, looking up, only to find a smirking Sarah crossing her arms across from her at the table.

“Just the regular, nothing too special,” she said, frowning quickly at Sarah before turning to face JJ again, hoping he hadn’t noticed Sarah’s behavior.

JJ jokingly frowned, “Nothing too special? I heard you got accepted into Charleston University, that’s like super special.”

Caroline cringed internally, “Did you happen to hear anything else by any chance?”

JJ smirked, “Not sure what you’re talking about,”

Caroline wasn’t sure if he was being serious or not but she pretended to not be bothered.

“Well I hear you’re throwing a party tonight,” Caroline crossed her arms in front of her.

JJ smirked even more, “Where’d you hear that from?”

“Why?” she tempted, “Is my source wrong?”

“Hardly,” JJ bit back, standing up, “So perhaps I’ll see you there.”

With that he walked back to where the other male counsellors were sat, giving one last look at Caroline, smirk never leaving his face.

Sarah started laughing loudly, “Looks like someone’s got their eye on little Carrie,” she teased, “Lucky, lucky bitch.”

Caroline rolled her eyes at her, “Bullshit,”

Sarah leaned over the table to whisper to Caroline, “I like the way you handled the situation, we’re definitely going to be there, on more occasions than one.”

Caroline looked at her watch, “Shit, it’s getting late, we better go now!”

And with that, they snuck their way out of the Wildcat Lodge and towards the boys’ cabin.

“Crap, the door’s locked!” Sarah cursed.

Caroline looked around. One of the upper windows seemed to be open. This gave her an idea.

“Sarah, do you still do cheerleading?” she looked at the girl, a plan forming in her brain.

Sarah raised an eyebrow, “What’s that got to do with anything? And duh, how else would my legs look this good?”

Caroline’s lips turned into a grin, “Give me a lift.”

Sarah’s eyes widened, “Excuse me?”

Caroline nodded her head towards the upper window and Sarah whined, “Why’s it always me?”

Silently, they rushed into position. Sarah took her stance, her hands ready to lift up Caroline’s body. Caroline balanced herself on Sarah’s shoulders as Sarah readied her hands to push her up. In one swift motion, Caroline had pulled herself in through the upper window and was now inside the cabin. She immediately went to the door to unlock the handle from the inside so that Sarah could let herself in.

The two girls looked around the space. It was dark and the only light penetrating into it was the one from the lamps outside. Three pairs of bunk beds were sitting there, covered in unpacked suitcases, boxes and bags.

“Great,” sighed Caroline in annoyance, “How are we ever going to figure out which one’s Routledge’s?”

Sarah took a better look at all of the bunk beds again, her eyes landing on one with a particularly large suitcase with a Green Peace sign on it, “My guess is that it’s that one.”

They went over to the suitcase and Sarah nervously leaned over it, “Eurgh, bug eating Routledge better not have live animals in there,” she said as she quickly ripped open the zipper, flinching away as soon as it came undone.

“That’s it!” Caroline excitedly said, “Help me pick it up!”

The suitcase contained three changes of clothes and a large box filled with unopened bottles of whiskey, just like they had heard John B brag about by the archery area. The two girls combined all of their strength to lift the heavy box off the bed and made their way towards the door, when they heard a loud thumping sound from the back of the cabin. Something heavy had fallen in the corner of the cabin that was unlit by the outdoor lamps, making both girls slightly jump and nearly tip over the box full of alcohol. They squinted their eyes in the direction where the sound came from, however they couldn’t make out anything in the thick darkness.

“What was that?” Sarah said nervously.

“Whatever it was,” Caroline said, leading them out of the door, “We can’t wait around to find out.”

With that they were out of the cabin, closing the door behind them and making their way back to their own cabin quickly.

They hid the box inside the storage room and decided to sneak back into the Wildcat Lodge, so that nobody would question their whereabouts.

There was half an hour left until the end of dinner service as Sarah and Caroline sat back at their designated table, trying to draw as little attention to themselves as they could.

“Do you think someone saw us in there?” whispered Sarah so that only Caroline could hear.

Caroline shrugged her shoulders, “I really hope not, but I did get the weird feeling that we were being watched once we heard that noise,”

Sarah shuddered, “Yeah, major heebie jeebies in there. Glad the boys got that cabin and not us.”

Caroline rolled her eyes, “Relax, Sarah, worst case scenario is it was just one of the guys and he saw us stealing tonight’s party supplies.”

Sarah raised an eyebrow, “I swear to God if it was Routledge -”

“If it was Routledge, he wouldn’t have let us get away with it,”

“Shit, Carrie, you’re totally right!” Sarah unwillingly raised her voice, “Who do you think it was?”

Caroline shrugged again, “Honestly? I don’t think it was anyone, I just think something happened to fall down on its own.”

“Hmm… You’re probably right again.” Sarah turned to look at the big clock on the wall, “We’d better get going, we’ve got to get ready for that party you got invited to!” she winked at Caroline, smirking.

Caroline looked towards the boys table where JJ was already looking back at her, a smile dancing on his thin lips. She met his eyes and a faint blush appeared on her cheeks. She decided to give him a little wave to which he happily waved back.

“Hello?” Sarah’s annoyed voice broke Caroline’s focus from JJ, “Are you coming or what? I want us to look good for when we see the guys’ disappointed faces tonight!”

Caroline sighed and followed Sarah out of the Lodge. Tonight was going to be interesting.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: I know I only just uploaded the first part, but I want to establish the Camp Willowdale universe as fast as possible so that the actual story can take off and it does in the next part. I'm going to create a taglist for people who have shown interest in the story thus far, so if you want to be included, make sure to leave a reply so that I can include you in the next part.

Also if you haven't noticed so far, this story, aside from fun and romantic, will be quite campy so I hope you're into that. We've also got quite the mystery coming up so stay tuned for that as well x

Alsoooo please give me some inspiration on who I can base Caroline off, I'm kind of leaving her up to the reader's imagination so that you can just imagine yourself as her, but ideally I'd like to have someone who's picture I can use for future photos. I've got my mind set on Maia Mitchel, but feel free to drop recommendations too.

Anyways, let me know what you think this far and feel free to check out the rest of my works in my masterlist. xxx

Part 3 here

[in-superbloom]

did you ever hear about the girl who got frozen? (a.i.)

right where you left me: prologue

pairing: ashton irwin x olivia jones (oc)

warnings: uhh a kinda grieving theme i guess? but no deaths. it has a sad tone overall, but nothing major (in this chapter hehe). foul language because i can't help myself. the tiniest mention of alcohol, but as a memory. think i should probably warn you that this contains a very sad ash. also not much dialogues. this is mainly for explanation and introduction, but very important for the story. if you find anything else that might be triggering, please let me know so i can add it here !!

author's note: oof okay. so. this is the prologue of a series very very dear to my heart that i've been working on for what it feels like my whole life but really it's been just a few months. but i'm in love with the story (which rarely happens with my own writing) so i hope you can enjoy it too !! this is also my very first time posting a fic since 2013 so pls keep that in mind <3 no i am not shaking as type this ofc not also: although i have the full story ready in my head, this is the only chapter that's written. i wanted to wait until i had at least a few ready before posting this but i'm too anxious for that lmao just saying this bc it will take a good while until i have any more chapters, so <3 (p.s.: i went over this thing a million times since may so if you find any errors pls look away, i'm not fixing this thing anymore. thanks <3)

another note: anna from the future here to say that i completely forgot about the playlist i made for the story lmao here it is in case you're interested k thanks bye <3

credits: title is from taylor swift's song right where you left me. model in the picture: paola locatelli. banner by me.

i also wanted to take a minute to thank some really nice friends that i've made here over these past few months & that i'm extremely grateful for @wastelandcth @suchalonelysunflower @littledrummerangie i cannot thank you babes enough for inspiring me the way that you do & for letting me yell about this to you && for encouraging me so much 🥺 i'll never be able to explain just how much this means to me, so i'll have to settle for saying thank you at any change that i can get <3 i love you all 💜 also gem my baby, thank you for the inspo with the banner 💚

@bluesdelis look babe i did it 😌 you know how grateful i am for you & for you letting me have a breakdown every week about my writing for the past 8 years so let's not dive into that or else i will write something bigger than this prologue jsjsjdjd love you 🖤

i hope you all have a good reading and a nice day ♡

let me know what are your thoughts about the fic ! ♡

word count: 4.1k

☆☆☆

Cold. That was the first thing that Olivia’s brain processed.

Still with her eyes closed, she buried herself more into the duvet, while her arm blindly reached for the furnace in human form that she calls boyfriend. However, as soon as her arm was only met with cold sheets, her eyes shot open.

Blinking the sleep away, she sat up on the bed, searching for the infamous red clock resting on Ashton’s bedside table that was supposed to look like a vintage alarm clock. Olivia had ordered it online at an auction website a couple of years back, as a gift for his 23rd birthday, since it was something he had mentioned multiple times prior that he was looking for, but still hadn't found. But when it finally came in (two weeks after the due date), it looked nothing like the picture she saw on the website. Feeling beyond frustrated, she wanted to send it back immediately and ask for a refund and maybe leave a not so polite review on the seller's page. But Ashton stopped her right away, laughing like the situation was absolutely hilarious to him, while saying, 'I like it, it’s quirky'. So, the clock stayed and found a home right next to him in their room.

Some days, however, she would wake up at some ungodly hour because of the blaring noise of the only ringtone the clock had. But whatever annoyance she could feel towards the object, it always vanished as soon as she felt Ashton's lips gently touching her face in a good morning kiss before he would get up to start his day, leaving her to catch some more hours of well deserved sleep.

As the furthest from a morning person as a touring musician could possibly be, Olivia had always feared that living under the same roof as Ashton would turn her into an early bird like him, but she's thankful that it never happened (not that he needs to know about that).

When she sees the red clock, she smiles at the sudden but welcome memories of them flooding her foggy brain, but frowns slightly when she realizes it reads 12:13 pm. Ashton rarely lets her sleep past 10 am.

Gathering all her strength and will, she rises up from the bed, smoothly picking up a grey wool sweatshirt from the chair (way too baggy on her slim body, but it smells like him), pulling it over her head and relishing on the soft material warming up her body. Making her way to the door and calmly going down the stairs, she can’t help but stop for a minute to admire the picture frames on their walls, one in particular catches her attention – probably one of the most prized pictures and memories they had. It felt older than it actually is, but it was around 4 years ago, she's sure – a little while after the two of them met. The picture was of their group of friends that still remains the same: Ashton and his best friend, Luke; Olivia, her best friend, Calum and their old hometown friend, turned into Calum’s new friend at college, turned into everyone’s friend, Michael; and her then newly band members, Suki, Eli and Ravi. Together, their group was the life of the party through all their college years, and it showed by the big smiles and drinks in hands they all had in the picture. It was a very special night, the first time Olivia’s little band played for the public – for a small audience sure, but it was a wonderful night nonetheless. What a long road it had been since that night.

Her nostalgic thoughts were interrupted by a shiver that went through her whole body, and it made her realize how oddly cold the whole house was, not only their bedroom. Which, granted, it was November in New York and the weather was just getting colder, but that’s exactly why Ashton always made sure to keep the house warm enough. As much as she loved the chilly season, the warm weather always reminded him of his hometown, and who was she to deny him that?

The smell of fresh made coffee could be sensed even before she reached the kitchen. Arriving there, the curly haired woman still found no signs of her boyfriend, so she went straight after the coffee maker pot sitting on the far left corner of the cream marble counter. Smiling softly at the tons of memories of Ashton's sleepy figure making their favorite beverage, she reached for a coffee mug on the cupboard on top of the counter and poured the remainder of the hot liquid on it (it's her favorite mug, if she must choose – it was a gift from a fan, and it had printed on it a collage of the pictures of her and Ashton that were posted on social media through their first year of relationship).

Moving to the glass doors that lead to the mini garden they cultivate, she didn't have to open them to spot the 6-feet-tall man sitting on a bench outside, looking oddly small in his oversized clothes, coffee mug tightly held between strong hands. Something about his figure made Olivia frown, however: he was staring with an unwavering look at her small but eye-catching pot of yellow daffodils that were almost as much of a pet to them as Stitch at this point. Sensing that there’s something definitely off about his semblance, she made a mental note to talk to him and find out what’s wrong later. So she goes back to the kitchen, knowing that he might need this quiet and private moment for himself.

She lost count of the minutes that went by (couldn't have been more than five) before she hears the garden's door opening and closing, and then his bare feet are dragging his brawny body to her. Except, he goes over to the sink, walking right through her, not showing any sign that he even saw her hunched figure over the counter table in the middle of the room.

Alright, someone's in a mood.

Olivia tries to swallow the annoyance already bubbling inside her – he knows how much she hates to be ignored, no matter how mad he might be – by trying to think of what she can say that won't piss him off. This is always a hard feat to accomplish when Ashton gets in these moods, but there’s a reason for them to work so well together.

“I missed my favorite body heater when I woke up,” she says in her best sweet voice, knowing how quickly his resolve crumbles when he hears that voice.

Still, no reaction.

That settles a worry at the pit of her stomach, because Ashton is never like this. Even when he's not in the mood to talk, he always gives some kind of reaction to her words; it doesn't matter how small, just enough to make her feel acknowledged.

When he's finished washing his mug and the few scattered dishes across the sink – she noticed that he already had lunch, if the lone plate in the drying rack is anything to go by –, he dries his hand in a towel, turns around and throws it on top of the same counter Olivia was leaning up against. Once again, he walks away not even sparing her a look.

Indignant, she leaves the now empty coffee mug on top of the table and follows him as he walks up the stairs, any determination to not aggravate his mood now well gone.

“Hey! In case you didn't notice, I'm right here. Whatever got you in this sour mood, I'm certainly not to blame, so can you stop being a child now and talk to me?!”

Ashton just keeps walking – more like sluggishly dragging his body – until he reaches their bedroom and suddenly stops just merely two feet inside the room, looking around with vacant eyes; like he was expecting to see something that wasn't there.

“Okay, that's really mature of you. Are you planning on ignoring me all day then?” Olivia questions exasperated, staring angrily at the back of his neck, where the condor tattoo lives – her favorite of his, but that sight doesn't bring her any peace today like it usually does.

Her glare only breaks when she hears the familiar sound of dog tags swaying on her right side. Shifting her gaze to the direction of the sound, Olivia notices Stitch, their small, black & white French bulldog – who she thought was outside in the garden – slowly trudging his way from around the bed until he stops at Ashton's feet, looking up at one of his humans with sad eyes. That realization only makes the worry in her stomach grow uncomfortably.

“Hi buddy,” Ashton's voice cracks a bit from the lack of use, but he smiles softly at the sweet dog, and crouches down to pet him.

Olivia can't help but gasp as she notices three things all at once that leave her overwhelmed: first, how she didn't even notice Stitch was in the room when she woke up – which never ever happens, in fact, most days he wakes her up whenever he deems her bedtime as finished and can't ever contain his excitement when she finally gets up; second, how the windows blinds are closed, which, again, rarely occurs under their roof, not if Ashton can help it. And third, how sad and melancholic the whole scene in front of her is – how sad and melancholic Ashton is. Pointless to say by now – that's also a very rare occasion.

A chill creeps up Olivia's spine, putting her body into high alert and also serving as a reminder of how everything looks out of place today. Trying to keep her head from spiraling down way too soon, she wraps her arms around herself and crouches down beside her two favorite boys, trying once more.

“Ash? Can you hear me?” even with her throat closing, she softly asks, purposefully putting her face in Ashton's point of view. Her only answer is the low whispers he's letting out to Stitch, while cradling the tiny dog in his arms, spreading gentle kisses on his head.

“I know, bud, I know. I miss her too,” is the only whisper she could understand and immediately wishes she hadn't. The weak wail that comes from Stitch's throat seems to fit perfectly with how the three of them feel.

Ashton then looks up and for a couple of seconds, and Olivia can swear he’s staring right into her eyes. But when he shows no reaction, she knows he’s just staring ahead and not at her, with that look that says there’s too much going on inside his head. She feels the urge to embrace him and get him to talk about whatever is on his mind, so they can share that weight like they always do, but when Ashton gets up from the ground and settles on the bed with Stitch, Olivia can physically feel the crack in her heart caused by the feeling she’s left with.

While Ashton is pulling the duvet over him and the dog, with clearly no intentions of getting up anytime soon, Olivia stands up on her feet with a new-found determination – she needs to figure out what the hell is going on.

This nightmare had to be just that, right? Nothing but a very vivid dream – she's had those before. Scary sure, but they always go away, and soon enough she's back into Ashton's arms, with Stitch jumping on the bed ready to lick their faces off. She just needs to wake herself up from whatever fucked up dream this is – right?

She's running down the stairs this time, frantically in search of something, of what exactly, she doesn’t know – but she knows she needs an answer. The more she looks for something, the more desperate she gets, not knowing what to look for. Then suddenly, something catches her eyes.

The white and blue calendar that's held up by magnets on the side of the fridge. She knows their calendar is red and yellow. They got it from their favorite flower market. Slowly, as if scared of what it might be there – “It's just a calendar, for fucks sake” – she approaches the damn thing. Upon inspection, she deems it as a normal calendar – she really doesn't know what she was expecting – until.

She knows what's wrong with it now.

It's November. She knows it, because the Asian and last leg of her first world tour is about to begin November 21st, eleven days from today. Right after Mike's birthday, she knows this.

Then why does the calendar say today is January 14th?

☆ ☆ ☆

Ashton woke up with a jolt. He quickly sat up, frightening the little Frenchie that was asleep right next to him on the bed. Trying to make sense of his surroundings, he roughly rubbed his face to get some sleep off of it and soon reached for the dog that was staring at him with sleepy but sad eyes. Ashton is sure Stitch understands far more than a dog is supposed to understand about their current situation.

The room is covered in shadows, almost pitch black, but he can see the sunlight even through the thick dark grey blinds covering up the windows. Ashton knows he won't be able to sleep again at that moment, so he gets up from the bed – much slower than he used to. His heartbeat is still out of control because of the nightmare that woke him up, but he can't bother to pay attention to it when Stitch is softly wailing beside him. Ashton lets out a ghost of a smile when the dog rests his head on his right upper thigh, looking up at him with an expression Ashton knows all too well.

“C'mon you little ravenous creature, let's feed you,” the bulldog excitedly jumps to the ground, already running his way down the stairs, not even waiting for Ashton to get up.

That gets a real smile out of him, but it vanishes as soon as he glances at the alarm clock on his bedside table. It reads 5:13 am, nothing out of the ordinary for him. But that small and inoffensive clock, with its red paint peeling off, holds a lot of memories for him. Memories that two months ago would bring joy to his heart, but now he almost wants to throw the object across the room.

It was a stupid thing, really. He had been wanting a vintage alarm clock and Olivia got one for his birthday. But the product they received was definitely not the one she bought, and if he's being honest, he didn't like it as much as he made out to. But seeing her so excited in the weeks before it arrived, and how disappointed she was when it did, he couldn't help but try his best to make her smile that luminous smile again. It's part of his nature by now.

That's also the reason why he lets her think that he doesn't notice when she wakes up at some ungodly hour (her words, not his) along with him, because of the annoying and only sound the alarm clock is able to produce. He always leaves soft kisses in every inch of bare skin he can find on her sleeping figure, so she goes back to the dream land and doesn't wake up before 10 am. No one wants to deal with that kind of bad humor, not even him.

As much as he likes being a morning person and absolutely enjoys her company in the mornings, he knows she'll take any and every extra hour of sleep she can get before starting the day. And that's why he loves that she's so stubborn that his early bird tendencies never got to her – he knows she feared that this would happen when they moved in together, but he met her like this, fell for her like this. He wouldn't change a single thing about her.

Ashton drags himself out of the bed, wincing slightly at how cold the wooden floors are under his bare feet. He doesn't bother putting some socks on, or a sweater – the cold weather in the house is uncharacteristically comforting to him. Nothing feels warm without her anyway.

While descending the stairs, he mentally curses himself for not being strong enough to look past the picture frames on the wall. One in particular catches his eyes – a picture from the night of Olivia's first concert with her band. The memories of that night are still painfully vivid in his mind: the laughter among their group that eventually infected everyone at the pub, Suki and Luke's first kiss and the silly smile that didn't leave his best friend's face all night, the standing ovation Olivia got after her three-songs set, and her captivating and breathtaking smile that made him realize right then and there, while watching her sway to the music, that he was definitely falling in love with her and there was nothing he could do to stop it – not that he wanted to.

So many memories held up on that wall, in the relatively short time since they met, that he can't help but wonder if that's all they'll get in this lifetime.

Ashton is abruptly taken out of his thoughts by Stitch's barks coming from the bottom of the stairs. He quickly jogs down the few steps left and goes straight after the dog's food in the kitchen's cabinet. After Stitch starts to happily devour his breakfast, Ashton goes to make his coffee, doing enough for two people like he always does, since Calum drops by most days for a chat or to drop Duke before going to work. Although all three of them know he just can't bother to make food for himself in the morning, while Ashton is the group's elected chef. Ashton always says he just needs a boyfriend – Olivia says Calum already has one who makes him breakfast every day.

He grabs an apple from the fridge and makes his way outside to their garden. Even though a lot of their memories took place there, the garden is the only space in the house where he doesn't feel like suffocating all the time. At least here, he can breathe some fresh air and look at the sky when he's feeling overwhelmed – which is basically all he's been doing for about a month now.

Yet, a lot of the garden has Olivia's name written all over.

He remembers vividly the day she came home after spending two weeks in LA doing some pocket shows, with a pack of daffodil seeds and the largest smile. She excitedly told him that a friend gifted it to her when she mentioned the little garden they were planning to build together at their new house. The friend told Olivia that daffodils symbolize rebirth and new beginnings, so as the good lover of symbolism that she is, Olivia loved the idea of having those flowers to symbolize their new beginning.

Ashton, on the other hand, wasn't a fan of the flowers at first – he just didn't see the appeal to them. But nonetheless, he indulged her, letting Olivia plant the seeds near the bench they used to sit during the quiet and unrushed afternoons, so they could admire the sunset, and she could happily look at the daffodils.

Pointless to say – the damn flowers grew on him.

Now, however, looking at them without Olivia and her contagious joy next to him, they were back to be as dull as they were before, if not more so.

Still lost inside his head without any sense of how much time went by since he sat down, Ashton doesn't hear the front door closing, and doesn't notice that he's no longer the only person inside the house until someone sits next to him on the bench. Yet, he doesn't show any sign of acknowledgement to them.

A few minutes go by before either of them speaks up.

“Luke said you didn't go to see her yesterday,” Calum starts softly, not wanting to disturb the calmness of the morning.

Ashton takes a few seconds to respond, “No point in doing that.” The black haired man licks his lips while thinking carefully about his next words.

“You know staying inside this house all day by yourself won't help either,” Calum turns his head to his left and takes a good look at Ashton's uncharacteristically hunched over figure, and immediately thinks that anyone can tell this man is not himself anymore. His second thought is that Olivia would hate seeing him like this.

“And what exactly do you expect me to do? Move on with my life like nothing happened? Like I'm not slowly and painfully losing the love of my life? Just because it’s easy for you doesn't mean it's easy for me.”

Calum closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. He knows Ashton doesn't mean it, it's the anger and frustration talking. He knows it. Doesn't make it sting any less.

“I'm not telling you to move on with your life, because that's far from what I'm doing, and I certainly don't expect you to do it. I'm just saying you need to occupy your mind or else–”

“I'll go insane? Think it's a bit too late for that,” Ashton interrupts with a bitter tone that doesn't belong to his usual chirpy voice.

“You know it's not,” Calum sighs and drinks the rest of his coffee, moving his body slightly, so he's facing the blonde man, “I got a job interview for you at that school you talked about so much last summer, the principal said you can go any day this week. I went ahead and sent her your resume as well as explained everything that she needs to know about Olivia, so you don't have to. You just gotta put on some decent clothes and show up.” he sees Ashton's face softening a little and takes it as a victory. A few beats go by and then, “Maybe take a shower too. That's gonna make you feel better.” Calum leans in closer to his friend's personal space and takes a sniff, causing Ashton to deflect from him slightly, but not to push him away – another small win.

“Definitely take a shower, you stink. When was the last time your hair saw shampoo?”

“Fuck off,” is Ashton's only reply to the younger man's inquest. But Calum can see a smile creeping up on the blonde's face, which brings out a smile of his own.

“I'll send you all the details later today,” he checks the hour on the watch on his wrist and gets up, “Just please, Ash, go. I can't lose you too.”

Calum gently lays a hand on Ashton's shoulder and squeezes a little. The man doesn't look up, but gives a curt nod to his friend, who's satisfied enough. Calum stops on the threshold of the garden glass doors to give some kisses to Stitch – who came to make Ashton company as soon as he finished his food –, and then he puts the coffee mug on the dishwater. And soon enough, he's on his way out of the door. But not before snatching a tangerine from the fridge.

Ashton is left by himself once again. As he hears the sound of the front door closing, he thinks that this might be his life from now on. Just him and Stitch, trying their hardest to make it through another miserable day without the love of their lives. While everyone else comes by just to make sure he's still breathing. Breathing, maybe, but alive?

Swallowing the tears, he looks up at the sky. It's a deep, beautiful mix of orange, pink and blue, but he knows that it won't last long and soon the rain will be pouring down. He thinks about how much Olivia loves the rain.

God, he needs to pull himself together. She would hate to see him like this. Maybe he should take Calum's offer after all, he really needs to occupy his mind.

Making a mental note to thank Calum later, and also to apologize for how rude he was to him this morning, Ashton slowly gets up from the bench to put his mug on the sink and makes his way to the living room, with the small dog loyally following his every step. He puts on some cartoon that for once doesn't remind him of her (she always lovingly made fun of him for still watching those) and cuddles with Stitch on the couch. He can take a shower later.

Not half an hour goes by, he falls asleep and has a good dream for a change. He dreams of the days he spent with Olivia in the Philippines last February, right before her first world tour started. Some of the most magical days of their lives – surrounded by delicious food, a whole new culture to learn about and the warmth of the sun. Infinite counted days full of love and passion, where they were the only people in the world.

Even his subconscious knows to hold on to that brief moment of happiness, because he might never live that again.

[miss-smutty]

The Destructive Secret

Chapter 3

A/N- The secrets out! Well to you guys anyway 🤫

Summary- You've got a secret to hide and it's going to cause complete and utter destruction. It's only so long until your lies are going to catch up to you.

Word count- 3,258

Warnings- Swearing, lies, deceit, cheating

Pairing- Chris Hemsworth X you / Liam Hemsworth X you

18+ only!

Disclaimer: This is an entire work of fiction/AU and has no affiliation to real life what so ever! This is a fictional story about fictional characters who happen to share names and faces with some real people.

Posted: 25th May 2021

Taglist-: @innerpaperexpertcloud @pandaxnienke @chickensarentcheap @mostly-marvel-musings

Chapter 1 + 2

"Morning babe, I tried to let you have a sleep in. I didn't wake you did I?" He asks, preoccupied with the washing up.

"No, I actually had a good sleep for once." You say nonchalantly while searching through the kitchen cupboards for a mug in a half asleep haze. "That's not going to last long when I have to spend the weekend in a hotel bed though."

Finally finding your favourite mug right at the back of the cupboard, you slam it on the counter a little more aggressively than you expected, startling you out of your daziness. Your boyfriend raises his eyebrow at you questioningly and you just shrug your shoulders back at him. It was definitely going to be one of them days, those days where nothing goes right. You would question what you'd done to deserve it but you already know the answer to that.  You were just going to have to put up with karma kicking your ass at any given moment for the rest of your life.

"Aww I know babe, at least it's only two night's though." He comes up behind you, resting his chin on your shoulder and wrapping his arms around your waist. "You've just reminded me -" He presses carefully, the way he shifts his composure telling you he's uncomfortable with what he's about to say and your heart begins to beat a little faster. " - I know you're going away tomorrow and I really wanted to have the night alone..." He pauses again.

"Just tell me, what is it?" You ask, trying to keep the annoyance from your voice.

"My brother called this morning, he sounds in a bad way so I said he can come over and hang out tonight. You don't mind do you?" Now your heart stops beating completely, what the hell is he playing at? 

 "I'm worried about him, he's not been right lately and he's going away for work tomorrow night too so it's the only time I can see him really." You're angry with him for saying he's going away too, how more fucking obvious can he make it? You're just both suspiciously going to be away with work at the same time. You can't protest about it now, you don't want to raise any more questions.

"No of course not, babe." You agree reluctantly, still seething with anger on the inside. "Right, I'm going for a shower and then I better start packing." You sulk.

"Do you want some help?" He ask as you kiss him on his cheek while you're passing. 

"It's ok babe, you know how meticulous I am with my packing." You say smiling softly at him.

"Gotcha, I am not getting involved with that. Give me a shout if you want a coffee." 

"You're the best." 

                         ****************

Using the tap to muffle the sound of your voice while you make a call. This was starting to become a habit now, the sound of running water in the background whenever you speak to him, a memory that you will never forget. Whenever you run your bath or fill the sink you're going to be reminded of your lying and cheating. Great! Just another thing to add to the list of things to look forward to in the future.

You never thought you'd be a cheater, especially to someone you loved and cared for so deeply. You'd always despised people who cheated, could never understand how people could have multiple lives and cheat multiple times. Naively thinking that if they weren't happy they should just tell the person they are with and stop all the hurt but it doesn't always work that way. You didn't suddenly think 'hey I'm not happy, I'm going to go fuck someone else'. You certainly wouldn't have chosen his brother if that was the case. Over the years it just happened and you hated yourself for it. You weren't even unhappy in your relationship, so that throws all your theories of 'cheaters' completely out of the window. The sound of the dial tone snaps you from your thoughts.

"Hi babe." He answers almost immediately, leaving you with no time to regain your composure. "Hello?" 

"Oh erm.... Don't 'hi babe' me." Not a great start, you have to admit.

"What's wrong?" You can tell that Chris is amused with your tone of voice and it makes that anger resurface.

"You know exactly what's wrong, why the fuck are you coming over here tonight?" 

"Erm to s-" you don't even give him time to speak before you interrupt him. You don't believe that he's just coming to see Liam, you know he's coming to see you no matter what he says.

"As if it's not awkward enough without having you both in the same house together... You have to cancel." The thought of them both being together with you filled you with fear. How were you supposed to act around them both? The idea of it fills you with chills.

"I'm not cancelling. I haven't seen him in a while and he invited me. It'll be fine, I'll be on my best behaviour, I promise. I get you all to myself tomorrow anyway." 

"Exactly so why do you need to come over here and make everything all awkward?"

"Babe I'm coming to see my brother, you get me to yourself tomorrow. Don't be selfish" you could hear the amusement in his voice, you're sure he enjoys this.

"Pfft." A huff is about the only thing you could manage right now.

"You get to have both your favourite people in the same room, at the same time... Hey maybe we can have a threesome?" 

"Fuck off." You murmur, although you have to admit the thought of it does turn you on slightly. In a perfect world that would be the best possible outcome but it's not a perfect world and that most definitely would never happen.

"I'll see you tonight, wear something sexy." He laughs.

"This isn't funny." You reply before hanging up the phone and you're left alone with the tormenting sound of flowing water.

This is going to be a disaster, you can't help but think that tonight is the night it all comes out. Surely this isn't what he has planned, he wouldn't want to hurt his brother in such a viscous way. To announce at dinner that he's fucking his girlfriend and that they've been going behind his back and fucking for years. Surely not?  You're pretty sure you're being paranoid but know you're going to be on the edge of your seat all night, frightened everytime he opens his mouth to speak.

                                 **************

You're sure you've downed almost a full bottle of wine before he's even arrived, you try to remember how many glasses you've had when you finally hear the dreaded chime of the doorbell. Your head is dizzy with bubbles already, your stomach churning at the thought. It wasn't the cleverest of ideas to drink so much already, not when you need to be sharp and aware of what you're doing and saying. Fuck.

The way Chris' eyes light up when he sees you reminds you exactly why this is all worth it. You feel your nerves settle slightly now the first step was over and it wasn't so bad was it? You don't know what you were actually expecting, him to walk through the door and kiss you passionately sounds about right though.

"Chris! Hi, how you doing?" You act, standing on your tiptoes to hug him. It's so hard acting like he's your brother in law and not your... Boyfriend? Lover? You don't even know what to call him.

"Hi, beautiful." He whispers into your ear, making your stomach flip when you feel his lips graze against your neck. "I'm good thank you, how are you guys?" He says louder, moving away from your arms reluctantly and standing against the counter. The glint in his eyes and the smirk on his lips make him look sexy as hell, you bite onto your lip as hard as you can. Hoping to draw blood so you can concentrate on the pain and not the fact you want to rip your boyfriend's brothers clothes off.

"We're great" Liam replies.

"I'm sure you are." Chris says sarcastically under his breath, luckily Liam didn't hear him. You give Chris the glare, reminding him to be on his best behaviour.

"But how are you? You didn't sound too good the other day." Liam asks, opening a bottle of wine.

"I was probably just tired bro, you know how it is. I don't get much sleep nowadays." 

"Oh yeah, is a woman involved by any chance?" Liam asks, laughing to himself.

"Yeah, something like that." Chris subtly grazes your hand as you walk into the kitchen to help Liam. You freeze on the spot, looking into his eyes you see a desperately pleading look. You know this is torture for him, that he just wants to grab you and hold onto you. Even though he tries his best not to, he hates his brother for it, he hates that he gets to have you.

"Anyway, it smells great in here. What you making?" Chris says locked in eye contact with you. 

"I've just thrown together some dinner." You say casually, although deep down your heart is tugging and your hands are shaking.

"Her food is fucking amazing, I probably should have made sure you hadn't eaten first though?" Liam puts his arms around you and kisses your cheek as you carry on stirring the food on the stove. You're glad you have your back to Chris because you dread to think of his reaction. How you have to pretend you don't know each other on that deep level. You had tried to warn him that this was a bad idea.

"Yeah, no that would be awesome. Thanks" You can tell by the way his voice broke that this is causing him pain and there's nothing you can do about it. 

                              **************

"Do you want a beer or are you ok with wine?" Liam asks Chris as you sit down at the table ready to eat.

"I'd love a beer bro" Chris replies. You watch from the corner of your eye as Liam heads to the fridge, your heart beating a little faster now he's out of sight. Looking to Chris nervously.

Chris takes the opportunity while Liams back is turned and grabs your hand under the table. Stroking your palm with his thumb he mouths the words 'love you'. You can't help but feel sorry for him, this horrible situation you're all in. You mouth the words back to him before he lets your hand go when Liam comes back into sight.

All the way through the meal Chris can't take his eyes off of you, you're worried Liam will notice but he's paying no attention. Obviously he has no reason to doubt his loyal girlfriend and protective big brother, why would he? Which makes your betrayal even more unbearable.

"This is great Y/N." Chris says after tasting your food and moving your dress a little higher so he can place his hand on the top of your bare thigh under the table. The shock makes you jump and you hit your knee on the top of the table.

"Are you alright?" Liam asks looking slightly confused.

"Sorry, yeah. I just burnt my mouth." There's a slight hint of amusement in your words, you're a bad person but the situation is just too much not to find it slightly funny. The feel of Chris' hand on your thigh makes you feel butterflies in your stomach at the same time as the deep sick feeling of dread, your mind in a giant conflicted turmoil of feelings.

You can see Chris is also trying to hide his laugh as he takes a sip from his beer, one hand still on your thigh. Why the fuck am I sat in the middle? You hadn't thought about it when you'd sat down but now realise it was a massive mistake and also subconsciously the perfect place for you. The playing piece in a match against brothers, only one player is unaware there is any contest at all.

Chris finishes his beer and puts it down on the table loudly, filling the awkward silence between you all. You can understand the awkwardness between you and Chris but why is Liam not speaking? He wanted to see Chris to figure out what was wrong with him but he's not asking any questions. Has he figured it out? Did he see Chris touch your hand earlier? Had he seen you both whispering? You wriggle in your chair, feeling deadly uncomfortable and hoping Chris would move his hand. He didn't take the hint.

"Do you want another?" Liam asks Chris, already getting up from his chair and not waiting for an answer. Something is definitely wrong. Chris's hand moves further up your thigh, grazing the lace of your panties with the tip of his long finger. He's also completely oblivious to your awkwardness, drinking too much is numbing his senses and becoming dangerous. He's playing with fire. 

You fling your chair back from the table, standing abruptly, your cheeks flushed red with embarrassment and nervousness.

"I'm just gunna get some more beers from the basement." Liam announces, Chris sat cooly in his chair with not an ounce of nervousness.

"It's ok I'll go, you guys have a chat." You say, desperately needing to escape for a minute to catch your breath.

"Don't be silly, it'll only take me a minute." Liam says, already walking towards the door.

Chris takes his cue again, standing from his chair and moving over to you. Standing closely so he can whisper in your ear, his arm pressed to the small of your back while he holds you against him.

"I can't wait to have you in my bed again tomorrow Y/N. I've waited too long." 

"Chris, shh." 

"No, you shh. I wish I had you now, right here. I could just sit you up on this counter and fuck you right here -" He moves his hand up your skirt, gripping your ass in his big hands. "- You want that don't you? Tell me." His teeth graze the skin on your neck, making your head hang back loosely. You want it so bad, all your tension melts away as your muscles relax in his arms.

"We've got all weekend Chris, we can't do this here. It's too risky." You sigh, carefully wrapping your arms around his neck and listening for any sign of Liam.

"Fuck I know but it's so hard being here with you and not being able to fucking touch you." He moves away from you, running his hand though his hair in frustration.

"I told you how hard it'd be." You say.

"How hard what would be?" Liam asks breathlessly. Fuck. You hadn't heard him coming back, how much more had he heard? 

You're lost for words, completely frozen in shock. If he hadn't heard or seen anything it was still way too close for your liking.

"To shoot this ball of foil into that bin from all the way over here." Chris replies hastily, you're incredibly impressed with his quick thinking.

"Let me have a go then." Liam says, taking the foil from Chris. Typical competive brothers. Chris turns to you and winks devilishly, you're perfectly aware of how desirable he looks but you try to push that thought aside. You can't be thinking about that, the things he had just been saying and the thrill of almost being caught, all at once. 

"My turn." You say raising your eyebrows at them both as you swing your hips, confidently over to the fridge. Chris bites his lip as he watches you walk over. "Watch and learn boys." This is quite possibly the strangest situation you've ever been in but you might as well make the most of it.

You shoot your shot and land the foil ball straight into the bin. Turning around and bowing, you're wide eyed when you straighten back up. They both moved towards you as if they were going to kiss you, luckily Chris stopped himself in time.

"Only you could've landed that shot." Liam says, picking you up in his arms, leaving you with no choice but to wrap your legs around him while he kisses your lips deeply. 

You risk a glance at Chris over Liam's shoulder and he's seething with anger, you can see it written all over his face. 

"I'm gunna go outside for some air." Chris announces blankly while Liam sets you back on the ground, a look of concern on his face.

"You alright bro?" Liam asks with no reply from Chris as he walks out of the door.

You get on with the cleaning up, distracting yourself and hoping Liam hadn't noticed Chris' reaction. You can sense Liam behind you, stood on the spot thinking. He's working it out, he's putting together all the pieces and finally working it out.

"I've worked out what's wrong with Chris." He comes up behind you, emptying the plates into the trash. Fuck, here we go.

"What do you mean?" You ask gently, not really wanting to hear his conclusion.

"You know, the reason why he's been moping about all the time." You don't turn around, you just listen, hiding your face and any reaction you're showing. "Well he's quite obviously jealous of us." He adds. There we go, he's worked it out or he's definitely worked out Chris' part in it all.

You felt your stomach drop, Chris was so obvious it wouldn't take a genius to see something was wrong.

"What makes you say that?" You press, carefully. Your back still turned to Liam while you clean the surfaces.

"Don't tell me you didn't notice how he just acted when I kissed you." Of course you noticed, you just hoped Liam hadn't. It won't be long until he puts all the pieces together and figures this all out, if he hasn't already. You pour the last of the bottle of wine into your glass, gulping it greedily. Lord knows you're going to need it.

"He needs a girlfriend, can't you fix him up with one of your friends?" You can't describe the relief you feel right now and a small twang of jealousy at the thought of Chris with one of your friends.

"I'm sure your brother isn't short of admirers Liam, he doesn't need me to fix him up" Your tone of voice was a little too short. Pull it together.

"I suppose you're right but he doesn't have the best taste in women does he?" You can feel your cheeks burning, you're fighting the urge to defend yourself. Telling Liam his brother had the same taste in women when it came to you, wouldn't go down quite so well would it? 

"I'm seeing someone actually Liam." Chris says, overhearing your conversation as he came back in after finally composing himself.

"Oh really? You never said." Liam asks curiously.

"Yeah, we're keeping it to ourselves for now... Until she tells her boyfriend." What the actual fuck? You can't believe he's just said that, he looks at you defiantly, completely over this whole thing.

Liam nearly spat his drink out and you're sure your cheeks are beetroot red, you don't have a clue what to do in this situation. 

"Is she married? Do I know her?" Liam questions further. You're hoping and praying he stops with the questions, Chris is ready and willing to come clean, you can tell by his expression.

"No not married but you do know her. You know her really well actually." Chris says while avoiding your gaze purposefully...

[jupitermelichios]

WIP Tag Game

WIP Challenge 😁❤🧡💛💚💙💜🤎🖤🤍❤😁🤩🤩 Rules: tell us the titles of all the WIPs you are currently working on right now and a little about them. Then tag five other writers.

@impishtubist tagged anyone who wanted to do it, and i decided to publically humiliate myself by showing you all how disorganised my writing process is

I tag @irolltwenties, @starcityrebels @gealach-in-a-misty-world, @kiseiakhun & @kittyaugust, and anyone else who sees this and thinks it would be fun!

Unnamed Sterek Remix

I realised Feels Good Doesn't It, one of the first multi-chapter fics I ever finished, was literally a decade old this year, and I thought it would be a fun excercise to try rewriting it and seeing how my writing has improved. And then I reread it and realised that, while there is still a lot about it I like, I had absolutely no idea how to construct a plot back then. So then I spent several hours pouring water into the plot of season 2 to see where it leaked, and ended up a fic that is half 'what if stiles got turned into a creature' AU and half 'what if season 2 made sense though' AU. I have no idea when (if ever) it will be finished, but it's colonised my brain like cordyceps spores and shows no sign of leaving, so maybe it will actually see the light of day eventually.

Unnamed Gotham Ghoul sequel

This one has been 90% done for at least a year, but won't tell me what it needs to actually wrap up the plot. It's an exploration of tim's mental health issues, because that seems to be all I write these days, although being the GG universe this time it has a fun cannibalism twist on the formula! Plus it's dick POV, which I don't write nearly often enough.

Back to the future didn't prepare me for this

The not!fic part of this project is chugging along, but that mostly just exists to advertise the larger (as yet unpublished) project of creating an in-world wiki for an alternate timeline version of the MCU. It's unquestionable the largest thing I've ever written, 200,000 words and counting, and it's going to appeal pretty much exclusively to whatever the crossover of mcu fic readers and blazeball fans is, but i have loved writing it so much that i don't even care that that's probably about 1 person.

the boy with a crooked shadow

this is a dead dove batman/robin vampire AU that wasn't supposed to be an anne rice homage but has definitely turned into an anne rice homage, and i have no idea if i'll ever finish it, but i think what i have so far is some of the best stuff i've ever written

Dick Goes Deep on Daddy Issues

I promise I'm not actually going to call it that, although it's been 10,000 words and well over a year without any better ideas, so maybe I don't promise that. Either way, it's the Dick/Midnighter prequel/side-quel to Pretty Boy, aka 21 pages of dick fucking his own demons for fun and profit

Untitled Constantine de-aging fic

sometimes i write happy fic, and sometimes i write zatanna having to babysit a version of john who hasn't even met her yet and has no idea why talking to him makes her cry. this is one of many WIPs that has a delicious set up and a great opening and yet it steadfastly refuses to develope any actual plot

untitled first time spike/angel/drusilla fic

i hate writing porn, i really do, so why are so many of my best ideas entirely centered around me having to write porn? but spike and angel are so repressed, and so convinced they're the least repressed people on earth, and i'm completely obsessed with the toxic and yet genuinely affectionate family dynamic the whirlwind have, so maybe having to write all that sex will be worth it

untitled tim & dana angst

i just wanted to write tim having a breakdown tbh and the period where he's not robin makes such a good setting for that, and i think dana's a really interesting character, and she makes a good foil for tim in this setting, but unfortunately i need a way for their conversation to end that isn't dana putting tim on house arrest or tim just throwing himself out of the window and i'm not actually sure that's possible, i completely understand why this scene didn't happen in the comics now.

And I Would Die For You A Thousand Times

I'm being optimistic, counting this as a WIP, but I want to be the sort of person who could finish it. that's who i aspire to be as a writer. it's a bbc musketeers athos/porthos/aramis fic with a merlin/every other character in merlin backstory, because lancelot was never actually confirmed to be properly dead and maybe walking through tears in reality makes you immortal, and maybe if you were immortal you'd seek out a regiment and soldiers who remind you of the knights you knew long ago, and then maybe you'd completely fail to tell them you were imortal while also falling despierately in love with them, and maybe, one day, i'll be the kind of writer who can actually write chapters and chapters of pining without it just getting boring.

untitled (and largely unstarted) teen wolf nailbiter au

the universes mesh so well, i don't even really have a plot, i just have the certain knowledge that these universes were meant to be glued together

An embarrasment of sequel ideas for just about every fic i've ever written

i've got let me take you by the hand sequels (and AUs), i've got joyce byers home for wayward teens sequels, i've got way way too many gotham ghoul sequels, i've got serial fiction sequels, i've got together sequels. if you want sequels... probably don't come to be because the chances of me finishing any of them are laughable

this is by no means all of them (my HP critique-as-fic ron x draco story is getting prodded at, and the gotham garage jaytim fic, and i know no one believes me any more but i promise not a catholic thing isn't actually dead!) but it's the most interesting ones, I think.

[unknownblanked]

Shameless self promotion

Main character: OC

Pairings: OC x Reborn

My fic:

*Fandom: Katekyo Hitman Reborn*

*Rating M*

Summary: I have never wanted anything other than to be a boss. Sorry dear brother of mine, but I will become a better boss than you would ever become. Warning: M for a reason, not for innocent souls. 2 days updates

Kinda BL since MC who used to be a girl became a guy after transmigration. But idk what to even say at this point

Genre: fantasy/adventure/romance

https://m.fanfiction.net/s/13908034/1/

First chapter preview:

Chapter 1

"Eff you! Eff me! Eff the world!" She shrieked with her lungs, hand pointed at the sky.

"I wanna hold guns and look cool in suits! I wanna be pardoned by university to become a boss! I wanna have a gang while playing background music!"

"IF I EVER REINCARNATE TO KATEKYO HITMAN REBORN, I'LL BECOME VONGOLA DECIMOOOOOOOO!"

Darkness enveloped her as she sunk deeper into the abyss, not knowing what was going on after that flash that blinded her eyes. Could it be isekai truck-kun? She scoffed at her own words, not believing a single thing that came out of her own thoughts. She felt a shuffle, then a thump as her whole world lifted in the air. Suddenly, a baby's cry chortled beside her, screaming.

What was going on? Was she being carried into some kind of ambulance? A hospital? Did she give birth-What? But she was still 19 years old and never touched a man's hand! The baby's cry grew louder, almost piercing her in the ears.

Was it even possible for her to remain conscious even though she couldn't open her eyes? She tried lifting her eyelids, but it remained glued shut, as if this impenetrable force was clamping down her eyes, telling her not to look.

A waft of air blew on her chest.

"[Papa! Look at them! Twins!]"

A woman's voice rang out loudly, but her tone was soft and melodic as the sounds of humans floated into her ears.

'...Japanese?'

"[Ah, but one isn't crying.]"

A man's voice rang out this time in front of her as she tried deciphering the words with all her experiences of watching anime for over 10 years. Crying? Did the man just say that 'one isn't crying?' Was he pointing to someone in the room?

She felt her whole world tip over before trying to flail, confusion ringing inside her mind before-

Slap!

"Waaaaaaaaah!"

'What the eff, bro?!'

She felt so sensitive-so...naked!

'Call my lawyer! I will sue you till you don't even have the freedom of speech! Lawyer! Lawyer!'

"Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaalw!" She yelped her syllables that couldn't pop out of her mouth and tried again.

"Wawawawa-"

Something was weird. Very weird.

"[I think we've got ourselves a little weirdo from the get-go!]"

Her butt stung as she tried blinking her eyes, gasping twice and shaking her head to wake her up from this bad dream. Her vision stung the moment she did, lights blinding her as she screamed again, trying to bat away the light with her flimsy small fists. Through her blurry vision, she saw a man grinning from ear to ear before throwing her over his shoulder and patting her on the back. She humped, dry launching from the action as the woman's soft laughter rang from behind as her own eyes closed shut again.

What did she see? She didn't see clearly, but the world was so...colorful.

"[I think I have a name for this little weirdo already!]"

Name? What name? What the hell were these two strangers talking about? And why in the hell was she able to understand Japanese so clearly? And they messed up her pronouns-and-

She tried hard, fighting her clamped eyes, 'Almost there!'

"Sawada Isago! Golden dust for my career!"

Isago slammed his eyes open, blinking rapidly at the man who was now throwing his small body into the air, his golden-amber eyes completely dazzling Isago.

"Waah da dak."

His first words were swear words in English.

She stared absentmindedly out the front porch. No, he stared absentmindedly out the front porch this fine morning. The sky was bright blue while Isago glanced at the buzzing street of Namimori, a small town located at the edges of Japan. In the corner of his eyes, he saw a small bird land on one of the tree branches before someone tapped him on the shoulder.

"Isa..go! Let's play!" Tsuna smiled sweetly at his younger brother, holding up his teddy in one hand. They were at the young age of four, Tsuna being born just minutes earlier than Isago. They seemed like twins, but one preferred a shorter hairstyle than the other, and their hair was in different colours.

"Hm...sure! What do you want to play?" Isago answered like how a four-year-old should and pushed himself onto his feet. Tsuna squeezed his teddy, pondering a bit before tilting his head to the side.

Tsuna was exactly the same in the anime, with spiky brown hair and brown eyes that shone brightly in the sun, his soft features held more of some baby fat than what was portrayed in the graphics, but still, Tsuna resembled Vongola Primo.

'Definitely a descendant of the Vongola family,' Isago quirked his lips as Tsuna explained his game of hide and seek, except the purpose was to hide and find teddy.

"Sure!" Isago chirped, holding his hand out for the teddy. "I'll go first then, since you never do, Tsuna."

Tsuna beamed brightly at his younger brother, giving his teddy over before Isago pointed to a wall in the corner of the room and Tsuna plodded over, covering his eyes as he started to count down from 100. Isago smiled slightly, tip-toeing to the washroom and turning on the lights to hide the teddy behind the rows and rows of shampoo bottles in one of the cupboards.

Isago frowned a bit when he realized that he couldn't reach the board, placed the teddy on the table and walked to the toilet that was beside the sink. He stepped onto the toilet, using it as his stepping stone and slammed his small hands onto the table, heaving himself upwards. Snatching the teddy from the original spot, Isago opened the cupboard and organized the bottles as a coverup, arranging the bottles so that not even the ears of the brown toy were visible from an adult's point of view.

Isago stepped down the table, plopping quietly onto his feet before listening to the countdown from Tsuna's mouth at the number 40. Isago smiled carefully, closing the lights as his gold eyes flashed through the mirror once, and Isago made his way to Tsuna's bedroom. Mom was cooking in the kitchen and humming about dad's arrival today.

Isago had retained his father's golden eyes, and yet had a shade of mocha as his hair color. Neither dad nor mom had the hair color, but Nana assumed that it was because her predecessor's hair color was close to black in the past. In contrast to Tsuna's spiky hair, Isago had flatter hair and was long, to the point that it was possible to tie it into a semi-ponytail. He had bangs covering the front in a slanted way, almost completely contrasting to Tsuna's cute and fluffy hair. Well, not that it mattered to Isago.

What was concerning to Isago, was that he was born as a boy.

"Ready or not, here I come!"

Isago heard Tsuna call from the bottom of the stairs before his small footsteps plattered onto the wood. Isago stared momentarily at the door before purposefully closing it and plopping down on Tsuna's bed. The bedsheets ruffled, crinkling a bit and Isago stared at his own crotch.

What the heck, this was so weird to have. It was so tiring to constantly have a thing dangling in between his legs. Even though it didn't hurt or feel uncomfortable, this new addition was a very mind-blowing...experience. Manspreading was also a new thing.

"Isago…?" Tsuna's face peeped into his own room and giggled before skipping over to his brother. "You must have placed teddy here!"

"I don't know," Isago replied with a small smirk. "Why don't you try and find it?"

"Teddy! Teddy!" Tsuna called cutely as if the bear was able to reply back to him.

"Tsuna, if you can find it then I'll ask mom to make your favourite Salisbury steak that she only makes when dad comes home!" Isago called as Tsuna's eyes fired up intensely.

"Steak! Steak! Steak!" Tsuna batted his fists on his crouched knees and started to chant it like some kind of song. Joy could be seen all over his face as he rustled his piles of stuff in the closet, then turned over to his desk and started rummaging in the drawers.

"Steak, steak, steaky, steak-"

Isago smiled secretly, knowing that Tsuna had no knowledge of dad coming home today. Honestly, Isago didn't know what to describe his dad. A good dad? No, he left his wife basically widowed from the moment they were born. A bad dad? You couldn't say that either.

Then again, mama never worked, so it was plausible to think that the house was bought and supplied with money from dad every year. Not to mention that the house was quite large for a family of three. Dad was probably also preparing the house to be the main hideout for the future Vongola.

"Iemitsu Sawada, huh?" Isago murmured his dad's name under his lips.

There was a reason why his dad stationed his family near the unknown town of Namimori. It was probably in order to protect them from the mafia. So in the end, was he a good dad? Isago watched Tsuna's fluffy hair swish in the lights as the sound of tires echoed into the neighborhood.

Isago lifted his eyebrows at the sound, turning his head to Tsuna's open window to see a short black car parked a few meters away from the Sawada residence. Isago stood up slowly, walking towards the window and hopped onto a small step box and leaned on the wall, crossing his arms together as he peered outside.

"Tsuna, let's rank this game harder. You have exactly 100 seconds like the countdown to find your teddy, or else the promise is off," Isago turned to Tsuna who's eyes widened like saucers, gasping before throwing his hands into the depths of his drawers.

"That's not fair, Isago!" The boy whimpered as Isago started to count the numbers from 100, forcing the small boy to sweat. Inside, Isago spotted a blond head popping out of the driver's seat.

The man was wearing orange overalls that were only pulled onto his waist. His dirty sweatshirt was worn in a fashion that showed his armpit hair clearly even from far away. The sight was disgusting.

"Men," Isago made a face, recognizing that it was his father. "66...67...68...69…"

"Isago! Slow down!" Tsuna wailed and rummaged through his toy box, tears streaming down his face at the decreasing numbers. Iemitsu pulled a construction hat out of the front side, then walked to the passenger's seat, opening the door to reveal another man wearing a blue vacation shirt with pink flowers on it.

The man stepped out of the car, smiling widely at his assistant who passed him a straw hat. As if the man noticed, his eyes flashed to the window, meeting the gaze of Isago. There was curiosity and wonder that passed through the male's eyes, but then greeted the child by lifting his hat and giving a salute which Isago returned with a polite nod.

'Vongola ninth,' Isago addressed the man quickly, curling his lips at the status before turning back to Tsuna, the numbers ending with the last count of zero.

"Isaaaagoo!" Tsuna sobbed into his long-sleeved sweater, sniffing as the sleeve soaked up his snot. "I couldn't find it-I'm sorry!"

Isago's eyes softened at the small boy, hopping down from the stepping box before crouching next to Tsuna who was on his knees.

"Tsuna, Tsuna, why are you sorry?" Isago patted Tsuna on the shoulders. Tsuna threw his arm down, staring at Isago who had a soft smile on his face.

"Be-because Isago's favorite...also steak…" the young boy blew his wet cheeks and Isago chuckled, pulling his brother into a large hug. That was not exactly true, Isago's favourite was sweet parfaits rather than savory main course meals, but Nana had never brought the two to a sweets cafe so Isago had made up his preferences to match Tsuna's.

"How about this, I'll magically transform the steak onto the table if you promise me one thing," Isago patted Tsuna who blew into his shoulder. Momentarily, Isago made a face of disgust, but once thinking that they were from the same blood, a smile was forcefully plastered onto his soft features.

Tsuna also realized his own misdoings, instantly freezing before wiping his own sleeve on Isago's shoulder, trying to correct the snot, only to make it smear even wider on the hoodie.

"I'll have to change my clothes," Isago sighed before pushing Tsuna away and walking to his own room. Tsuna followed like an abandoned puppy. His two fingers fiddled as he watched Isago pull his T-shirt off, and grabbed a random sweater before pulling it over his head.

"Mm sorry Isago…" Tsuna trailed off, staring guilty on the ground as Isago's head emerged out. "I will promise anything that you want! Forever!"

'What a dangerous promise, Tsuna,' Isago's eyes glimmered before turning towards his brother. The shadows in his room casted upon Isago's face as his grin widened almost too maliciously.

"Then promise me Tsuna, no matter what the circumstance you must not harm me. If you do, then our relationship as brothers are over." Isago's hair fell over his eyes as he brushed it back, getting a clear look at the boy's small face.

"Harm?" Tsuna tilted his head curiously at the word, repeating to make sure he pronounced it correctly. "What's that?"

"It means that I will be gone from your life forever, Tsuna," Isago's voice deepen with glee at the horror that flashed through the boy's face. Tsuna's hands instantly clutched the sides of his shorts, shaking his head furiously.

"I will never harm you! I will never! Never!"

"Good," Isago walked closer to his dear brother, jerking his thumb under Tsuna's teary eyes. The young boy looked fragile and broken at Isago's words, almost as if he couldn't imagine living without Isago.

"Because I love you so much that it may serve as a double-edged sword to both of us," Isago gave little Tsuna a small peck on his cheeks, smirking at Tsuna's pouting face as his fingers clutched the edges of Isago's sweater.

"I wove you too," Tsuna buried his face into his brother's sweater, murmuring the phrase until the front door was pushed open and mama's clear voice rang through the house, calling the two boys down.

It was true, Tsuna was a precious little brother to Isago, even if Tsuna was legally the older one. But that didn't matter in front of power. If Tsuna stood in the way of succession, then Isago would cut off Tsuna's arms and legs to prevent Tsuna from overtaking the throne. That was how cold-hearted Isago was.

But then again, was Isago able to do it?

That's why Isago would give Tsuna the choice. He would not harm Tsuna until his own brother decided that Isago was a threat to the family and his life. He would let Tsuna break their relationship, and make him wallow in despair. As long as Tsuna loved him, Isago would let him go. But if Tsuna disobeyed, then everything will be over.

"Come on, brother," Isago gestured towards the door, stepping forward with Tsuna holding him. When they reached the bottom of the stairs, Iemitsu was grinning at both boys, arms extended.

"Weirdo Isago! TsunaTsuna! Papa is back home!"

The two boys huddled over to their papa, Tsuna waddling towards him while Isago was pulled into a large embrace, dad's hand ruffling in his hair as Isago grinned at the man. The smell of sweat and tobacco filled Isago's nostrils, instantly making him suppress a sour face at his own father. Mama giggled at the family reunion while Isago's eyes trailed to her, gesturing for a group hug.

"Oh, dear!" Mama threw herself into the group hug and Iemitsu kissed her sloppily on the cheeks, rubbing her face with fondness. It was then Tsuna noticed a stranger behind dad, smiling sweetly at the family after Tsuna opened his mouth with quivering fear.

"Oh, Tsuna! Don't worry, this is Timoteo-" Dad looked over at the grandfather figure, releasing all of us as he gestured politely at the man. "-My boss."

"Welcome!" Nana grinned, lowering her body into a 90-degree bow. "Thank you for taking care of my husband all this time!"

Isago glanced towards his mom, then followed, repeating the same words of thanks. Tsuna only stood there, confused and not knowing what to do and hid behind his mother, clutching her apron.

"Tsuna!" Mom bickered with a sigh but smiled soon afterwards. She patted me on the head as a 'good job' before apologizing for her son's imprudence.

"That isn't a problem," Timoteo said, softening his eyes at us before crouching down to our eye level. "I have to thank you for having such a wonderful father that I can trust."

'Of course, you're literally naming his son as successor,' Isago thought bitterly before pulling Tsuna out from behind mom. 'So who is it going to be? Tsuna, or me?'

Vongola ninth had to choose between the two of them because they were the only ones that would be left in the Vongola bloodline. If what Isago remembered was correct, there was more than one successor to the Vongola line, but they all died, which left Tsuna being the only one that could inherit the family.

Tsuna's hand started to quake before Isago squeezed it reassuringly, giving him a small nudge. Tsuna was still hesitating so Isago started first.

"I'm Isago, this is Tsuna, my older brother!" He deliberately said, lowering his head as Tsuna, this time, followed his younger brother's lead.

"Oh, he's the older one, huh?" Timoteo turned his gentle gaze towards the older brother and nodded. Isago pleaded that they were going to leave the throne of successor to the worthy, not the older. Isago was going to prove himself worthy, prove himself, to be a better leader than his brother.

Tsuna was not suited as a leader, maybe in the long run of taking care of his family members, yes, but Isago was more of a leader in the expanding and influential way.

'Give the role of successor to me, and I will hold Vongola to its glory. I will make Vongola the strongest in history, and it will flourish more than the past ten generations combined.'

Isago wanted the Vongola position. He wanted it desperately.

As if Timoteo could hear Isago's thoughts, the grandfather's eyes turned to the younger sibling, staring at him hard. Isago didn't move his eyes, only stared back and tried to convey the message through his gaze.

'Give it to me, I want it. I need it.'

Timoteo's gaze deepened, opening his mouth to say something as conflict passed through his face, then clamped his mouth shut. Iemitsu, sensing that something was sort of amidst, invited his boss into the house, telling the group that he was famished. Nana gasped, pardoning her forgetfulness before guiding the guest to the table.

Isago let go of the breath he held inside, looking towards Tsuna who was staring at the grandfather.

[walviemort]

hidden blessing (2/?)

Summary: Killian thought the only thing he was left with after Milah’s death was a broken heart and a thirst for vengeance. It’s not until he gets to Storybrooke, after so many years spent in stasis, that he discovers something else: he’s carrying her child. How does this new, tiny blessing change his path? (Canon-divergent from 2x12.)

rated T | part 1 | AO3 | 2.2k

A/N: hey! It’s another update! looks like this might be an every-couple-weeks thing, as I find time to work on it. like the first chapter, this is dedicated to @sherlockianwhovian​ for being awesome. hope everyone is staying safe!

A few days later, Killian had been released from the hospital and was finally enjoying a much-needed uninterrupted nap—or so he thought. When he’d first arrived back at the docks, the prince and princess were also there, attempting to interrogate him about Cora’s whereabouts; why this town was convinced he was her babysitter was unknown to him, so he’d had to disavow them of that notion. (It had also become blatantly obvious where Emma had inherited both her violent streak and her impatience; even if the man hadn’t raised her, she was definitely his daughter—and he vowed then and there that such a fate would not befall his child).

He was already tucking himself into bed on his ship when he heard the commotion above deck that told him the so-called heroes had unlocked the cage containing the giant; the sounds of struggle (and what was hopefully the prince being punched) along with ensuing footfalls running off the ship were the last things he heard before sleep blissfully claimed him.

He was dreaming of what his quarters might look like with a crib next to his bed, toys strewn across the floor, when he was rudely awakened—again. What an inhospitable town.

“Hook?” a feminine voice called out from the deck. “I know you’re here.”

“Bloody hell,” he cursed to himself, throwing back the covers and rising as quickly as he could with his still-sore ribs. Getting his pants back on took more effort than he’d like, but that was all he bothered with.

Barefooted and bare chested, he climbed the stairs to see Regina waiting impatiently. “Yes, your highness?” he asked, not bothering to hide either the tiredness in his voice or his annoyance.

“There you are. My mother sent me. You know, the one you were supposed to kill?”

“Oh, that. Well, I didn't want to deprive you of a happy reunion.” His grin was fake and she knew it.

“Well, it's your lucky day. She and I have made amends.”

“And you're here to thank me? How sweet.”

Regina’s responding smile was equally fake. “Not quite. She wants to know if they've found the ship.”

If he’d had his hook, it would have been on her neck for interrupting his nap for what amounted to little more than a business conversation; she just wanted to know what was going on with the giant.

“Is that all?” he asked when he’d given her the update. “Because if so, I’ve really got some things to attend to here.”

“Yes, that’s all,” she said, but tilted her head in curiosity. “I figured you’d be a lot more ready to get your revenge. You’re typically chomping at the bit for some murder.”

“If I could get some bloody sleep, I’d be more ready for that,” he snapped back. 

She narrowed her gaze on him and looked him up and down. He wasn’t sure what she was looking for, but her eyes stopped at his midsection for a brief moment and widened. Instinctively, he moved his arm in front of him, but that might have been a fatal move. 

Her eyes found his again with an uncomfortably knowing smirk on her lips. “I’ll leave you to your rest, then. See you around, Hook.” And with a wave of her hand, she poofed away.

If she knew, he would deal with that later. First things first: back to sleep. (And maybe some food.)

----------------------------------

After a week of rest, he found his bones were doing much better, though the nausea he’d been dealing with had evolved into full-blown sickness. The pamphlets told him that was normal but it was exceedingly obnoxious. At least his food stores on board were fairly bland.

“I can’t believe you actually enjoy hard tack,” he said to the babe; a different pamphlet told him the baby couldn’t hear him yet, but it was comforting to talk to them—or at least complain.

Much like he’d noticed in the hospital, it was almost whiplash-inducing how quickly he’d rearranged everything in his life to put the child first. But he also knew that, had his life followed a remotely normal trajectory, he and Milah would have done the same. Where he once thought revenge was the only way to honor her, he now knew that protecting and raising this child would be better.

“But, oh love, I wish you were here,” he whispered to the night sky, hoping that wherever she was, she’d hear him.

He read over the pamphlets Doc had given him many times over, until they began to look ragged and he worried they might not make it through the duration of his pregnancy. One listed several books that could be referenced, but given his history with the town librarian—and he being the reason for her current leave of absence—he’d have to make do without them. 

Briefly, he considered seeking out Emma’s help; but based on their last encounter, he doubted she’d give it. Still, though—she was the only one around that had been through all this that he might be able to talk to. Maybe at some point. But not in the immediate future.

One fact remained, though: no child of Killian’s—and especially Milah’s—was safe while the Dark One still roamed free. So once he felt closer to being on the mend, he dug some ginger drops out of storage to hopefully aid the nausea and sought out his would-be allies.

Cora and Regina were deep in discussion when he arrived at the queen’s mansion, but he caught a few key phrases and didn’t care about interrupting. “Where's Rumplestiltskin gone?”

They both jumped at his voice, but were too poised to let it throw them off. “I don't know,” Regina answered tearfully.

A glimmer of hope he hadn’t felt since before the dark curse started to glow again. “Well, if he's left town, then he's powerless. He can be killed.” The ladies went on some diatribe about how they’d lose their magic if they crossed the town line, but he didn’t care. “Well, I don't need magic. I'll go after him alone.”

Regina stood and gave him a look he didn’t like—one that said she knew too much. For a moment, he feared she might out his secret, but thankfully she didn’t. She still lectured, though, “Even if you could find him, do you really think you could just walk to him and stab him in the heart with your sword?”

“Well, I'd prefer my hook, but I can't seem to find that now.”

“You're not going anywhere,” Cora scolded.

“I deserve my vengeance!” he bit out angrily. And, moreso, the security in knowing that his child would grow up safe. The pitying look Regina was giving him told him she at least understood.

Cora didn’t notice, thankfully. “You're right. You do, and with the Dark One gone, we can search for the one magical item that could actually kill him here—his dagger.”

Somewhat ironically, they ended up at the library, searching for...something. Part of him desperately wanted to leave them to their quest and find the recommended books, but much too quickly, Regina discovered the map.

It was easy enough to decipher. But he really should have seen Cora’s betrayal—and subsequent magical assault—coming. 

(At least Regina seemed vaguely apologetic before he was rendered unconscious.)

Whatever. He was more than capable of doing things on his own.

But first—he found those books; hopefully, no one would mind if he hadn’t formally checked them out. (The atlases...well, hopefully no one needed those references anytime soon.)

It took some more surreptitious spying to figure out where the Dark One had gone, and he took more than a bit of pleasure in knocking out the prince to retrieve his hook from storage in the constable’s offices. 

And then he was on his way to whatever this New York City was. He started reading a book called What to Expect When You’re Expecting on the trip there—then locked everything related to childbearing in his private safe on the ship before leaving it. He was confident no one would discover it, but one could never be too careful.

Finding the Dark One was surprisingly easy. 

Stabbing him was thrilling; everything he’d ever dreamed of.

But his fatal flaw was not factoring Emma Swan into the equation, nor the heavy metal canister she threw at his head.

Still, though: he’d stabbed a magicless Dark One with the worst poison known to man; another thing that had been stored in his safe. The last thing Killian saw before slipping into oblivion—again—was his mortal enemy’s prone form, knowing that there was no cure for the venom making its way to his heart.

I’ve done it, love, he thought. He’s done. We can move on. Which “love” that was, he didn’t have time to consider. All he knew was that finally, he could rest, and await whatever came next.

----------------------------------------------

He’d been in worse brigs than the one he subsequently found himself in. Having his left arm awkwardly chained to a bed frame wasn’t ideal but the Tamara lass fed him, let him use the lavatory as needed (which he was finding he needed to do with more regularity), even allowed him to bathe every few days. (Out of necessity, she’d also provided him with a bucket for dealing with his bouts of sickness; he wrote it off as withdrawal, and she didn’t question it. Not the first time a reputation as a boozy pirate worked in his favor.)

He was far from a willing prisoner, but she’d hidden his hook and always had her gun at the ready, so there were no smart ways for him to try to stage an escape. Besides, Baelfire—because he was the person Emma and the Crocodile had been searching for—had apparently absconded with his ship back to Storybrooke. (Which brought up all other sorts of memories and thoughts.)

“Don’t worry; I’ll take you back to it,” she promised him. If it weren’t for the fact she was constantly peppering him with questions about Storybrooke, he wouldn’t have believed that it was her destination, too. He was careful to not give much away, though; he doubted her goals were worthy. 

“Just when are you planning this trip? You’ve been saying that for two weeks now,” he had to ask her; he was finally starting to get a bit of cabin fever, and was eager to get back to his ship and chart out a future for him and his babe. 

“When I get the sign. Should only be a couple more days.”

He rolled his eyes and went back to his reading; he was nothing if not a patient man. As long as they left before the child arrived, he supposed it’d be alright. He’d have preferred the books he had on the ship but thankfully, only he had the key to where those were locked away. But reading Tamara’s collection of novels was a good way of learning about this realm. Despite not having actual magic, its advanced technology seemed to make up for it. 

Like the shower. Bloody hell, what a marvel! Tamara had to give him a lesson his first time using it, but what a luxury! (And to think it was a standard amenity here...incredible.) Letting the hot water run over him, cleanse his skin and soothe his aches, was the main thing that made this farcical imprisonment bearable. 

That, and it was in there he noticed the first visible sign of his child. Obviously, he’d been watching his midsection with a keen eye, but any changes seemed to be a long time coming. 

But then, at around 14 weeks, he first saw it: his navel was sticking out ever so slightly. Were it not for his minimal diet, he could have attributed it to normal weight fluctuations; but based on the increasing visibility of his ribs, he knew he was probably losing a bit of weight instead of the opposite. 

Still, his point of view of his stomach from inside the shower wasn’t the most reliable, he knew. But when he stepped out and stood in profile in the looking glass, it confirmed it: his child was starting to make his or her presence known. It still only looked like he’d eaten a rather large meal, but considering he hadn’t...bloody hell. Were it not for his prison guard rapping on the other side of the door for him to hurry up, he could have spent hours there staring at it.

It wasn’t long after that he started feeling the first twitches of movement within, as well. Nothing strong enough to be felt from the outside, of course—he thought it might be gas at first—but once he realized what was going on, it was all he could do to hide the tears of joy from his captor.

But he also found himself periodically plagued with guilt, especially with the revelation of Bae’s presence in this realm. Even so long after, he was still haunted by what he’d done to the boy. It was strange to think, but had things gone differently, they might have had the chance to actually be a family—the lad would have been an excellent big brother. 

That chance was probably long gone now, but it only furthered Killian’s resolve to be there for this one—to not do what either his or Bae’s father had done.

“That won’t happen to you, my love,” he murmured late at night, hand over the tiny bump and the tiny babe, gently fluttering within. “Gods above couldn’t keep me from you.”

----------------------------------------

thanks for reading!! tagging some friends (and let me know if you want a tag!) @cocohook38​ @wyntereyez​ @jennjenn615​ @superadam54​ @ashley-knightingale​ @justsomewhump​

[leelee10898]

Fast cars & Freedom: Body say (9/?)

Ellie and Luca spend the day with Colt and friends. Will they be able to get along with the pending divorce? Catch up HERE

Raiting: Mature. This chapter contains NSFW content.

Pairngs: Logan x Ellie, Colt x Ellie

Song inspiration:

Ellie darted across the Dormitory parking lot. he feet sloshing through the large puddles, body frozen from the cold East coast rain. She mentally reprimanded herself for committing to a school where it gets so cold. She pulled her rain soaked clothes off,immediately upon entering the warmth of her Dorm. She put on her trusty Langston sweat shirt on and a pair of leggings as she sat indian style on her bed.  She pulled the cardboard box from the bag and ripped it open, tearing the foil wrapper as the plastic stick landed in her open palm. How did she end up here? In this mess?

She had been in school a few months, constantly tired, nauseous, she chalked it up to stress and nerves. It wasn't until her jeans wouldn't button, and the increased appetite did she realize she was late, very late. She took a deep breath, walking into the bathroom. A few minutes later she sat the test on the sink, forcing herself to look at anything but the slim piece of plastic.

Ellie paced the floor, it was the longest five minutes of her life. She was a smart girl, straight As, Valedictorian. Her common sense went out with window when it came to not one, but 2 bad boys. The phones timer went off, with shaking hands she reached for the test, flipping it over.

Two pink lines.

****

“Ellie? Earth to Ellie!”

“Hmm, what?” She perked up. “I was saying,  I have Darnell’s number, you'll need to call his office and set up and appointment. Jesus,  where were you?” Riya stared at her best friend. “I'm sorry Ri. My mind was elsewhere.” she sat up, trying to give her full attention.  “Yeah, no shit. Whats on your mind El? You've been lost in thought a lot lately.”

“I was just thinking about the past, about the what if’s.” Riya rubbed her temples, this was the same song and dance she had been going over with Ellie for the past 5 years. Ever since Luca was born, she started with the what ifs.

“What have I told you about the past?”

“That its the past and there is nothing I can do to change it.” Ellie sighed. “Very good. But what you can do is focus on the future.  Soon you'll know who Lucas father is, and you'll have that closure.” She squeezed her hand. “speaking of closure. Have you told Colt you filed?”

“Yeah. I um called him the other day and told him.” she filled Riya in in the conversation she had with colt, how he wasn't happy about her filing and asked her to reconsider. She and Luca were headed to Colts house the next day for a bbq and she hoped it wouldn't be awkward.

The next morning she woke up to Luca in her face, overly excited for their trip to Colts. Ellie got up and went through the motions of getting ready and also packed up. Colt gave her instructions to bring a bathing suit for them both, and a change of clothes as well as Pajamas incase they decided to stay over if Luca got tired. She chuckled to herself at the memory of their conversation.  She had been doing this far longer, yet here he was telling her what to pack.

Ellie loaded Luca into the car and put the address into the GPS. She had recently bought a new car, Toby cried when he seen it. He was upset she did not take him with her and called it a grandma car. Her mind wandered, wondering what Colts home would look like. She had been to Logas house, it was beautiful,  big, not something she would have picked herself, but it suited Logan well. When she thought of where colt would live, she could only picture the old garage. The small, Dimly lit living quarters off to the side with 2 small bedrooms.

She turned off the road, to where the GPS told her to.  Her eyes widening at the sight in front of her. It was a modest blue,beach front cottage with a large wrap around porch. This was definitely not the garage. She got out of the car, unhooking Luca from her car seat when she looked up to see colt standing shirtless at the top of the stairs. “Cooooolt.” luca went running into his arms. “Hey squirt,  you ready to have some fun?” Luca shook her head enthusiastically “Ahhh heck yeah I am.”

“Luca! Watch the language.” Colt chuckled shaking her head. “Go on in and see uncle Toby. He's been driving me crazy for you to get here.” Colt walked down to the car helping Ellie with the bags she had.

“You didn't tell me you lived at the beach.” She eyed him. “Yeah part time. You like?”

“Well the outside is beautiful, I haven't seen the inside yet.” He gave her a smirk motioning inside.  The inside was just as nice, the walls were painted in earth tones, a nice nautical theme decorating the walls and tables. She didn't see it being the work of colt, clearly a female decorated, maybe an ex girlfriend?

He showed her around, three bedrooms, 2 bath. a nice kitchen, living room and dining area. She felt a bit jealous, she always wanted to live at the beach, or even just have a beach house to disappear to every so often. “Gangs all here. Toby, X, Mona. Want a drink?” He asked. She nodded “I'll have a glass of moscato if you have it.” Colt walked into the kitchen returning a minute later, glass in hand. “I asked Ximena to find out your favorite.” The gesture making her smile.

They walked out onto the back deck, Ellie hugging everyone her eyes settled on a woman, with long brown hair she had never seen before. Colt placed his hand on the small of her back, walking her over to the mystery woman. “Ellie, I would like you to meet my mom Darcy,” He looked at his mother “Mom, this is Ellie.” Suddenly Ellie felt very awkward, she tried her best to steal her nerves and extended her hand. “Hello, it's nice to meet you.”

“Oh honey no, I don't shake hands.” She stood up pulling Ellie into a hug. “It's nice to finally meet the elusive Ellie. If it wasn't for the few pictures he would stare at for hours, I would have thought you were fake.” “Mom.” Comt gave her a pleading look. “Pictures?” Ellie arched her brow at him, she made a mental note to visit the subject again later. “Ooook, I think Mona is looking for you.” Colt interrupted.

The afternoon went by, they ate and reminisced about the days of the MPC, Darcy sharing some stories of her time there, at least the ones she didn't mind Colt hearing. She had moved past that life long ago, but something in her eyes told Ellie something was unsettled there.

Colt and toby took Luca down to the shore line, letting her play. Ellie sat at the table watching them. The way Colt took to Luca warmed her heart. “Mind if I join you?” She looked up seeing cindy “Sure.” She answered, quickly bringing her focus back to the sight in front of her.  “Luca is a gem, such a beautiful little girl and a lot of sass. She reminds me of Colt when he was a kid.” Ellie turned to face her “Oh yeah?”

“Mmhmm, he was a smart ass from the time he learned to talk. Sharp as a tack too.” She chuckled. Ellie looked back towards the ocean, Colt shooting her a wink that made her momentarily.

“I can see what my son sees in you. Your sweet, kind hearted, intelligent, not to mention cute as a button.” Ellie blushed again “Ah thanks.” “You remind me A Lot of myself when I was younger.” Ellie turned her body towards Darcy, sensing she had more she wanted to say.  “You were smart to get out of that life, make something of yourself. You were smart to file for divorce.” Ellie's eyes widened “Really? You're happy about the divorce?”

She took a long swig of wine, sitting the glass down on the table.  “I love my son. He's always been drawn to the life of the crew, he's got a lot of Teppei in him. Sure he's on the straight and narrow now, but that can all change in an instant.  For the Kaneko's, that life runs deep.”

Ellie couldn't answer, she had no words. Darcy reached out grabbing her hand “I can tell you still Love him, its written all over your face. End it while you can.”

“Well, it's time for me to hit the road. Think about what I said.” Ellie nodded her head as she watched Darcy make her way down to the beach to say goodbye to Colt. She sat there dumbfounded, but Darcy's words replaying in her head End it while you can. One thing she was sure of was the fact she needed A Lot more wine.

They enjoyed the rest of the afternoon hanging out and talking. Ellie sat at the outside table on colts deck. Talking with Ximena, Toby and Mona. They had gotten on the subject of parenting, and how her life has changed since becoming a mother.

“I have never been away from her for a whole night before. I've come home late, and she's been in bed. But she has always been there.”

“Oh sweetie. You need a night for you. Where you don't have to be Mom, and can just be Ellie.” ximena said.  Colt stood against the railing watching Luca play in the sand, but listening to the conversation going on around him.

“I haven't had that in almost 6 years. I wouldn't know how to even act.” Ellie shook her head with a smile.

“Hey why don't Toby and I take her for the night.” Ximena grinned. Ellie hesitated “oh! I don't know.”

“Oh come on Ellie belly. It'll be great. Oh we can make a pillow fort, and watch minions, and make popcorn.” Toby squealed with excitement.

“Its Toby and X, El. You know damn well they would never let anything happen to Luca.” She looked between them, of course colt was right, toby and ximena were protective of her, and took to Luca as if they were her aunt and uncle. “Ok. Fine.”  she sighed.

“yes!” Toby jumped up running to the top of the steps. “you hear that Lulu, you're having a sleepover at Aunt X and uncle tobys house tonight!”  Luca came screaming, “Really? Alright! Yes! Thank you mommy!”

“Don't thank me, thank your Da-. Colt. Thank colt.” she silently prayed he didn't hear it, She didn't mean to say that, she had no idea if he was or not. But all of Colts certainty was affecting her thought process.  Luca ran over throwing her arms around him. “Thank you Colt, thank you so much.” He softened right away, wrapping his arms around her, she could make out a faint glistening in his eyes.

Ellie could feel the stinging in her eyes, it had been the first real bit of raw emotion she had witnessed between either him or Logan with Luca. She didn't expect it to effect her that  much. “Excuse me. I have to go, check something.” she tried to even her voice, but she knew he would pick up on it. She walked into the house, making her way towards the bathroom. “Hey, El. What's the matter.” the tears were already spilling from her eyes now. “No. Nothing. Im fine. Really.”

He touched her shoulder, turning her around. “Why are you crying? Did I do something wrong?”

“No.” she half laughed “You did everything right. It just got me a little emotional that's all.” Colt knew what she was talking about,  it hit him in the feels as well.

“She. She really hugged me. Like a real hug Ellie. I don't, I don't know how to explain it.” He couldn't wipe the smile off his face. It was in that moment he knew, no matter what those test results said, he would protect that little girl with his life. Luca was the brightest star in his sky. and ellie was his Sun and his moon.

A short time later Ellie and Colt stood at the front door waving goodbye to Luca. Colt going back Inside to start cleaning up once the car was out of view, Ellie following a moment later. She jumped in the kitchen starting to wash dishes. “You don't have to do that, I can get those.” Colt insisted but Ellie waved him off.

He put the food away, and started cleaning other areas of the kitchen.  “So what are you going to do on your night off?” he questioned as he wiped down the countertops. “I don't know honestly, maybe take a bubble bath, watch some tv.” she shrugged as she finished up the dishes. Her phone pinged from across the room “on second thought,  maybe not.” She frowned. “What's wrong?”

“That was my dad, Sally is staying over. Maybe I'll just get a room for the night.”

Colt walked over handing her a glass of wine “You can stay here, don't argue. I have a guest room. Now take your ass out on the deck and relax.” He nudged her outside as he finished cleaning up.

Ellie stood against the railing, feeling the warm sea breeze against her skin. She closed her eyes letting the sound of the waves breaking against the earth calm her. She wasn't sure if it was her moments nirvana or the wine but she felt more relaxed then she had in a long time. Colt stood against the doorframe taking her in, this was something he could get used to, something he wanted more then anything he just had to change her mind, show her that they belonged together.  

Ellie noticed Colt standing there out of the corner of her eye. “It's a beautiful view.” she spoke, back turned to him.  “Yeah, it is.” He spoke never taking his eyes off of her. He walked over joining her against the railing. “I text X to check on Luca. She's watching a movie with toby in their pillow fort.” He chuckled. “I'm glad she's having fun. Thanks for checking on her Colt, you really have no idea how much I appreciate how accepting you guys have been of her.”

“Hey, you don't have to thank me El. I love that little girl no matter what.”

Ellie leaned up, placing a soft kiss on his lips taking them both by surprise. She pulled back their eyes locked, each searching the other for any sign. Colt made the next move, his lips back on hers this time with more force, he kissed her like his life depended on it, a hunger rising within him that he suppressed for to long.  Ellies fingers tangled in his black locks, deepening the kiss a soft moan escaping her.

Colt reached down grabbing her by the back of her thighs and lifting her up, she wrapped her legs around him as he walked her into the house. He pushed her up against the wall his lips fixed on her neck. Her head was spinning, she hadn't been with anyone in a long time and the way his lips felt against her ignited a flame within her. With her legs still wrapped around him he pulled her sundress over her head, tossing it on the floor as he carried her to his room and laying her down on the bed. his hand reaching around unhooking her bra, tossing it across the room, lips crashing against hers as his hand gently kneaded her breast.

She knew in the back of her mind this wasn't a good idea, but the need to be touched, to feel the pleasure was overpowering. She reached up yanking his shirt off, her fingers caressing the ripples of his muscular chest. His breath hitching in his throat as she reached down palming his stiff length.  His lips trailed down her neck, his lips leaving a trail of fire in their wake. His tongue swirled each of her pink buds, giving each attention before making his way down her stomach to her hips. Ellies breathing picked up in anticipation as to what she so badly wanted, needed to happen next. His dark eyes met her lust blown ones as telling him all he needed to know, he hooked his fingers in her lace panties and slowly slid them down her legs.

He settled between her legs, slowly slid his fingers between her slick folds, moaning in Appreciation at just how soaked she was for him. The rumble of his voice and the feeling of his breath against her skin making the anticipation un bearable. Her mind told her no, to stop before it went any further, but her body said differently. She needed it, she wanted to feel his mouth on her, to feel his calloused hands all over her. “c colt, please.” She whimpered, trying to push herself closer to him, begging for him to end her misery. A smirk spread across his lips as he placed open mouth kisses against her sensitive skin.

He jutted his tongue swirling against her bundle of nerves. She let out a loud moan at the sensation, as he skillfully worked his  against her clit, watching her chest rise and fall with hooded eyes as she neared her climax. He slowly slid two fingers into her, pumping them in and out, watching her come apart under his touch.  She threaded her fingers through his hair, pulling him closer, her legs began to shake as she cried out his name,he quickly pulled out his fingers, replacing them with his tongue as she came, him taking everything she gave.

Ellie laid there trying to catch her breath. It was everything she needed yet not enough,  she needed more, she needed him. “Colt. Please.” she panted. He stood wiping his mouth, he knew what she wanted, he wanted it to, but he wanted to hear her say it, no he needed her to say it.  “What do you want Eliana. Tell me what you need.” His voice deep and sexy, it made her body ache, and hearing him say her name turned her on even more. “I want you Colt. I need to feel you inside of me.”

I0n one fluid motion he stripped his shorts and underwear down, joining her on the bed. His mouth claiming hers as he settled on top of her. He reached between her thighs pumping his thick long length, teasing her with the tip. “Colt. Please.” she begged. He sunk into her slowly with a low groan resting his head in her forehead. She felt amazing, maybe even better then he remembered.  Ellie sucked in a sharp breath as he stretched her in ways she dreamed about for 6 years.

He began to rock into her starting off slow, allowing her body to relax. His lips softly sucking on the spot of her neck that he knew drove her crazy. He began to pick up the pace, the need to hear her scream his name, to make her come undone becoming to great. He settled on his knees pulling her legs up lifting  her slightly off the bed as she wrapped them around him allowing deeper access. “F. F fuck colt, yes.” she moaned as he bucked wildly against her, he lifted her up their bodies pressed against each other as she matched his thrust. He could feel her walls flutter around him, she was close and he wanted to blow her mind.

His fingers slipped down between her legs as he rubbed tight circles against her still sensitive clit. She buried her head into his shoulder, her arms wrapped tightly around him nails digging crescents into his back as her body began to shake. “Let me hear you Ellie. Let go, I got you.” He moaned into her ear “Oh Colt, yes. Don't stop. Don't stop.”

His name flew off her lips like a matera as the coil snapped, her body shook as she gave into an intense orgasm, her juices flooding his cock. The sensation to much to bare, he pumped hard twice before giving into his own release with a loud grunt. They collapsed into a sweaty heap onto the bed.  

They laid their entwined with each other, neither wanting to move, both in fear that if they did they would lose the moment forever. Ellie knew she shouldn't have given into temptation, but at least this way they got a proper goodbye. “Colt.” she broke the silence, “this doesn't change anything. We can't-”

“Just let us have tonight Ellie.” He cut her off, knowing this wasn't going to change her mind. “Tonight.” She whispered as her lips found his again.

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[b1acksw4n]

Who Do You Love? Part 4

Genre: Hybrid!AU, highschool AU, some fluff, LOTS of angst, maybe some smut in future chapters

Pairings: Hybrid!Taehyung x Reader Jungkook x Reader

Summary: Hybrids were owned by humans and were viewed as pets. But what happens when hybrids are given a chance to be our equals. When Kim Taehyung a tiger hybrid transfers to your school, your whole world is flipped upside down. He’s mysterious, which draws you in. Jungkook doesn’t like the sudden interest you take in this hybrid...

Words: 1.6k

"I'm sorry.. about him.." You sighed, looking down at your feet. Taehyung only smiled softly. He took your backpack and carried both of yours. He took your hand, intertwining it with his. Blushing softly you both walked to your house. "Thank you.." His deep mellow voice broke the silence, as you two approached your house. "For what..? I didn't really do anything.." You questioned, your eyebrows knitted together and furrowed. The hybrid's sleek ears drooped shyly and he was so soft spoken you had to strain to hear him. The height difference didn't help much either.

"I was used to being treated like an animal... but you treat me kindly... I just want to thank you YN." He voiced quietly, his ears still slightly drooped a bit. You blushed slightly, hugging him. "How sweet.." You grinned at him. He winced a bit, but hugged you back. "A-Ah I'm sorry I didn't mean to! I just g-got carried away!" You apologized frantically. "No you're alright YN. I'm just not used to that. Getting hugged I mean.." By this point the hybrid was rubbing the back of his neck out of bashfulness. "Well in that case, I'll give you more." You smiled up at him. Which in return he did the same.

Once you and Taehyung entered your house, you went upstairs in your room and set your backpacks down. Getting out your books, you set everything up and got out all your supplies. "Tae, do you want anything to drink?" You got up, heading for the door, looking back at him. "Ah sure! Thanks again YN. You're such a sweetie!" He gave you his signature box smile, his canines showing. You shyly nodded, at a loss for words, just staring at him for a moment. Realizing you've stared a second too long, you scramble to the kitchen, grabbing two glasses.

'He's so cute. He's so sweet too.'

Filling them up with water, you shook your head trying to shake the thought of Taehyung. No, you couldn't be thinking things like that. Entering your bedroom again, you set the two glasses on the small table in front of you. Scooting over next to Taehyung, you grabbed a pencil, Taehyung bit his lip, your thigh now touching his. Grabbing an English notebook, you flipped open to lesson 2. "Alright TaeTae.. now where does the comma go?" You asked, pointing to the unfinished sentence in the notebook. Taehyung whined, then put his hand on his chin, as if in deep thought. "Right after that word right there!" He said with overflowing confidence. You giggled. "Nope! But you're close TaeTae!"

"TaeTae?" Taehyung questioned, raising one brow. "Ah I'm sorry.. I never asked you if i cou-" You went on hastily, rambling on, but he interrupted you. "No no! It's cute!" He smiled softly. Before you both knew it, two hours had passed and it was now 5:00. "Ah I should probably get home." Taehyung explained, gathering his belongings. "We should uh.. get some coffee or something sometime." He awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck, eyeing you a bit. His yellow eyes made you feel so mesmerized. "Yeah definitely!" You smiled at him. After that he left, you closed the door behind you only to get a call from Jennie.

"YN, we need to hang out right now!!! I'm coming over!!" Jennie yelled into the phone. You flinched a bit. At least expecting a greeting. Her bold and persistent actions made smile to yourself. 'Just like Jungkook', you thought. Suddenly, you felt a bit guilty. You and Jungkook always walked home together.. and today you didn't. You'd have to make it up to him.

"Wait wha?!-" Before you could finish your sentence, there was a knock at your door. Aish, this girl.

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Jennie laid spread out on your bed, her nose currently stuck in the latest magazine. You were currently playing a game on your gaming console. Mortal Kombat to be exact. "It's so violent I don't know how you play that!" Jennie explained with a shiver. You just grinned and gave her a shrug. At least it meant you and Jungkook had fun game nights at each other's houses. "Sooo.. what's going on with you and Jungkook?" Jennie asked casually.

You went silent. The sound of her flipping through the thin flimsy pages of the magazine suddenly stopped. You suddenly couldn't hear the grunts from the game, and your fingers hitting the buttons on the controller anymore, you didn't even notice until your character died that is. "W-What do you mean..?" You stuttered, eyebrow twitching in irritation. "Cmonnn you can tell me YN. You two would make a cute couple! Go for it, what are you waiting for?" She tilted her head, tossing the magazine aside, it now laying wide open to a random page with bright cascaded colors. "Well... Jungkook and I.. well I don't know. We're best friends Jennie." You stayed matter of factly, standing up, wiping yourself off in the process.

"YN, you have to like him, or maybe he likes you.." She wiggled her eyebrows at you. Which instantly caused you to scoff and playfully roll your eyes at her.

"Hm and what does it have to do with you."

"Because you're my friend! I can't let you be under this dry spell forever!" She explained, her arms flailing around, her eyes wide. "I so do not have a dry spell. I'm just busy with other things. Like school and other... stuff." You had to pause and think for a moment before you could even retort back at her. Ok.. maybe she had a point. "Have you seen how many girls look like lost puppies because of Jungkook. He's hot. He could get anyone he wanted." Jennie sighed, inviting herself over to your closet, opening it.

"I guess you're right. Then I wonder why he spends time with someone like me.." You pondered, not bothering to question what the hell she was doing. "Duh. He likes you and I'm so gonna help you get that di-"

   "Ooo!! What about Taehyung?! He's a cutie! I see you talk to him a lot lately. He seems kinda shy, but that's nothing we can't fix!"

"Jennieeee.." You groaned, throwing one of your accent pillows on your bed at her. There was no doubt that your face was red from embarrassment. "I don't even see Jungkook like that, and I don't know how to feel. I just met Taehyung.." You sighed, staring up at your dull white painted ceiling. Jennie rummaged through your clothes, letting out an exasperated gasp. "Yah what?!" You shot straight up, snapping your head at her. "You need to borrow my clothes, YN." She gave you a serious look, putting a hand on your shoulder as she looked down at you. "Why." You pouted, cutely looking up at her. "You wear grandma clothes and we're going to Hoseok's party tomorrow night. Jungkook wont want to see you in grandma clothes YN!" She dramatically but violently shook your shoulders, causing you to shriek.

"Maybe Jungkook likes my grandma clothes." You glared, sticking your tongue out which caused her to let out yet another exasperated noise. Jennie laughed, shaking her head. "What am I gonna do with you?" "Nothing. You love me." You shot back. "I can't wait for this party tomorrow. You best bet Taehyung and Jungkook will be there too, YN." She grinned. "Just let me wear my 'grandma' clothes." You groaned. "No, I'm dressing you up. We're gonna have everyone droolinggg!" She went on, taking a huge scoop of chocolate ice cream and shoving it in her mouth. "Fine. But unlike you I'm actually very fond of this dry spell I supposedly have!" You pouted.

   Jennie gasped. "Do I really need to prove to you that you have a dry spell?"

   You pouted more, shaking your head in disapproval. Jennie quickly dialed Jungkook's number, giving you a smug look on that pretty little face of hers. As if to prove her point any further. Jungkook answered and Jennie put him on speaker, holding the phone between you two. "I'm with YN. At her house. Well we were talking you see.." Jennie sighed dramatically, looking over at you with glossy-like puppy dog eyes. "Yah Jennie don't!!" You huffed, reaching for the phone, in response, she held it up in the air. "Ooo go on!" Jungkook laughed. Ugh, why were your friends finding amusement in your misery?

   "YN doesn't think she has a dry spell." Jennie unexpectedly blurted out. Jungkook laughed. "Yeah she totally has a dry spell! How does she not see it?" He laughed harder. "Hey you're on speaker Jerk! I do not!" You retorted, snatching the phone from Jennie. "Do tooooo! I mean you're cute, so who cares. It means you're good." He cooed into the phone. Blushing heavily you stayed quiet. "Well maybe I don't want to be just cute, Kookie."

Jungkook's eyes widened, trying to find the hidden meaning laced under those words. Jennie hung up and he could hear the call being disconnected.

[borathae]

~Chapter 26~ I just want to say I LOVED this chapter so much. Them making up and all the fluff 😚👌💕 My heart really needed that. Also how you describe Namjoon in your story is exactly how i think he is in real life. Like always having some really well worded advice that sounds so well thought out but he didn't even have to think about it that hard, it just comes naturally to him. Where does one find a Namjoon? And the tea part? Excuse me? That was a whole movie moment. 😭 Eternity biiitch 😭 I had literally so many song options for this chapter but at some point I had to stop myself lol

🖤 My Everything - Ariana Grande

In this chapter or rather in the time between this & the last chapter oc accepts that she wants jungkook back in her life and said let's work on what we have bc it's far too powerful & special to just dismiss it because someone made a mistake which can be worked out. I think she always knew this but now she accepted it. "I've cried enough tears to see my own reflection in them and then it was clear, I can't deny I really miss it." I think oc realised this especially once jk revealed he needs time to think and that's when it hit oc that he might not come back and that she actually can't live without him. "To think that I was wrong, I guess you don't know what you got 'til it's gone. Pain is just a consequence of love. I'm saying sorry for the sake of us. He wasn't my everything 'til we were nothing. And it's taken me a lot to say. And now that he's gone, my heart is missing something so it's time to push my pride away 'cause you are, you are, you are my everything."

🖤 It's Gotta Be You - Isaiah Firebrace

I actually think this song represents both their povs. "I hear a million voices in my head telling me the things I should have said. I don't know why I let you go, oh I learned the hard way. Tell me it's not too late. Now my arms are open wide, they're hanging forever there, waiting forever, for you. I won't give up on you this time cause I ain't holding up, for nobody else. It's gotta be you."

🖤 Blind (Acoustic) - PRETTYMUCH

I can just see jungkookie laying alone in a motel bed pretending this is seriously over, crying himself to sleep and when he closes his eyes all he sees is oc. "I lose my mind before I see you and I separated, no I'm so scared to lose you, never choosing to let go. Love's so fragile, anything could happen, and we know. Hearts made of glass, but somehow we last. Yeah we made it, no I would rather be without vision 'fore I ever watch you leave. [...] I'd be better off blind. [...] When I close my eyes all I think about is you."

🖤 Here To Stay - Josh Devine

Jungkookie is here to stay 😭 "My heart on the line, so you'll never doubt the mountains I'd climb for us now. It's all about us now. I fooled my heart, let it break. I know this time we won't fade cause all my love's here to stay. [...] Through the dark fight our way. I know this time I can change. [...] I'm giving up everything for this, we'll figure it out I promise."

🖤 Call You Mine - The Chainsmokers & Bebe Reha

I'm sorry but that's literally their story if you replace bar with diner. "When we thought that we couldn't get higher things started looking down. I look at you and you look at me like nothing but strangers now. Two kids with their hearts on fire, don't let it burn us out. Think about what you believe in now, am I someone you cannot live without? 'Cause I know I don't wanna live without you, yeah come on, let's turn this all around. Bring it all back to that bar downtown when you wouldn't let me walk out on you, yeah. You said, 'Hey, what you doing for the rest of your life?' and I said, 'I don't even know what I'm doing tonight'. Went from one conversation to your lips on mine and you said, 'I never regretted the day that I called you mine'."

🖤 Fire Meet Gasoline - Sia

This is what I imagine playing when oc just can't take it anymore and literally throws herself at jk and they hug so tight he can't breathe 😭💖 "I ache for love, ache for us, why don't you come, don't you come a little closer. So come on now, strike the match, strike the match now. We're a perfect match, perfect somehow, we were meant for one another, come a little closer. Flame you came from me, fire meet gasoline. [...] I'm burning alive. I can barely breathe, when you're here loving me." Also "I got all I need, when you came after me"

🖤 Can't Help Falling in Love - Haley Reinhart / Kina Grannis

Those are two separate covers but I just can't decide between them. You know just the whole 'so you really want me to stay?' 'yes we complete each other' vibe. "Shall I stay? Would it be a sin if I can't help falling in love with you? Like a river flows surely to the sea. Darling, so it goes, some things are meant to be. Take my hand, take my whole life too. For I can't help falling in love with you."

🖤 Best Years - 5 Seconds of Summer

This relates to the last chapter where jk realised he wants to build a life with oc. And this just sounds exactly like something he would say to her when they're sitting together on the couch 😢 "You've got a million reasons to hesitate but darling, the future's better than yesterday. [...] Gave you a million reasons to walk away. But I'll build a house out of the mess and all the broken pieces. I'll make up for all of your tears. I'll give you the best years. [...] I promise, darling, you won't regret the best years."

🖤 Black And White - Niall Horan

Same as the previous song and also this is literally their story. "That first night we were standing at your door fumbling for your keys, then I kissed you, ask me if I want to come inside 'cause we didn't want to end the night. [...] Yeah, I see us in black and white, crystal clear on a star lit night in all your gorgeous colors. I promise that I'll love you for the rest of my life. See you standing in your dress, swear in front of all our friends there'll never be another. I promise that I'll love you for the rest of my life. Now, we're sitting here in your living room telling stories while we share a drink or two. And there's a vision I've been holding in my mind, we're 65 and you ask 'When did I first know?' I always knew."

Okay, okay so I gotta go on and hurry up with replying to your messages fjsdfjas. Excuse my lazy ass, but I really want to take my time with your messages and saDLY online classes didn’t let me until now 😔🤧

Honestly I totally agree with you, this is highkey how I imagine Namjoon to be in real life as well. Also no joke, working on Namjoon was always so much. I really loved his parts in the story. They were so healing for me to write hahfhads 💜 

Also I am literally so happy that you enjoyed Chapter 26 so much, it is one of my favourite chapters from the story as well. It is just so healing and cute. Like that part when Kook makes her all laugh and Namjoon is all like “damn that bitch laughs really weirdly” but Kook is all like heart eyes for her. do yOU HEAR ME CRYING IN MY ROOM?? 😔😭💜

Imma put the rest under “read more” because your bitch has a lot to say hahHAH

My Everything - Ariana Grande

Your description just hIT me like a truck. HAHAHHA BYE I am laughing in pain 😭😭 Oh god I don’t even know what to add because you described it just so perfectly well 😭😭 I caN’t here I am cryIng at the first song you recommended 😔

It’s Gotta Be You - Isaiah Firebrace

Okay lis t EN I am :( I will literally start sobbing right here and now 😭 like omfg that part when he is all like “When you walked away my heart tried to replace ya with someone like you, but I could never find it. I don't want to find it.” if that isn’t the reader trying to move on with Hoseok but realising just how much she needs Kook. But also at same time it’s Kook all trying to pretend that they have broken up, but ending up crying every night because he misses her so much. I will now cry 😭😭

Blind (Acoustic) - PRETTYMUCH

Okay you just changed my mind, this is IT. This is most definitely Kook being all sad and heartbroken in his motel room. Nooo lisTEN I AM FAR TOO EMOTIONAL I AM SOBBING :( Okay but also this part, listen this part: “I'm so scared to lose you, never choosing to let go [...] When I close my eyes all I think about is you. This is real love.” if that isnt them being all like “I’ll never let go again” later when they are cuddling in bed :( 

Here To Stay - Josh Devine

Okay... why are those lyrics literally so damn accurate?? Help I am scared? They are literally so accurate hgnfgnan bYE 😭😭😭 also omfg I didn’t know this song and I freaking love their voices. They just HIT right 😭 I can’t jajsdj like every song you’ve recommended as of now made me cry (in a good way) 😭 like just that part “We'll figure it out I promise cause all my love's here to stay.“ I will throw myself away 😭

Call You Mine - The Chainsmokers feat. Bebe Rexa

listen anonie I wanna smooch you. I do not know how you always manage to find songs that just F I T so right, I am comBUSTING 😭😭 gosh this is giving me such hardcore memories of how it felt like to start writing this story (lil fun fact for you guys, exactly one year ago I started working on the Cocktail Trilogy 😔) I can’t this would fit so well to a lil flashback, showing all the amazing times they had together. Like them just driving down the coast, the reader has her arms around his waist while Kook is sneaking a glance her way and smiles. Like just imagine 😭

Fire Meet Gasoline - Sia 

Omg the moment you described 😭 this is it. I can imagine it so clearly. How Kooks eyes widen in surprise at first before they flutter closed. How he nuzzles his face into her shoulder and twists her sweater in his fingers so she would never leave again. How she is squeezing her eyes shut and twisting his hair to press him even closer. Now that they are finally together again it feels so right. The world could burst into flames all around them and yet they wouldn’t let go. Nothing matters for them except the other person. 

And now I made myself sOB again  😔😭

Can’t Help Falling in Love - Hayley Reinhart / Kina Grannis

OKAY LISTEN NO JOKE I LISTENED TO THE KINA GRANNIS COVER WHILST WORKING ON THAT CHAPTER! I love that song so much and holy shit the lines you chOSE YES!! 😭😭 this is song is them 100%, I don’t make the rules and I thank you for recommending it 😭😭

Best Years - 5 Seconds of Summer 

Anonie you are out to make me cry 😭😭 (first of all I love 5sos so much) HOLY SHIT LISTEN THIS IS TOO MUCH 😭😭 I can’t, I literally can’t. This just broke me HHAHSH 😭😭 like if that song isn’t the moment when he is all like “you won’t regret it I promise. I’ll make you so happy.” liKE HOLY FUCK MY HEART IS ACHING 😭😭 anonie seriously thANk YOU, you don’t even want to know how often I have listened to this song whilst working on Purple Rain. Good god, this just awoke so many memories 😭

Black and White - Niall Horan

ANOTHER SONG I CONSTANTLY LISTENED TO WHILST WORKING ON PURPLE RAIN 😔 anonie I can’t believe that three songs of my “writing songs” also made you think of Purple Rain. Fuck I can’t, I’m currently listening to it and I am sobbing HAHAHH 😭 like okAY listen, do you want to know which scene I always think about when I listen to that song? The one day when Kook took her to a junkyard and then when they later drove up a mountain to watch the city. And it’s that moment when they are both just like screaming on top of their lungs and then end up falling into each others arms because they are just so goddamn fucking alive when they are together 😔

Honestly anonie thank you. This playlist was such an emotional rollercoaster to listen to (in a good way). Holy shit it awoke so many memories and fuck, you just get me and my story 😔 thank you anonie, I really fucking love you 😔💜