#i'm workin' on it!

[brawlqueen]

PSA * !

while i don't need or really....like? to make these posts, and i try not to be personal unless my mutuals are people that i am comfortable sharing it, but i've definitely been struggling to write period. writer's block, call it what you will, but it's definitely been causing me anxiety when it shouldn't. so i decided to start replaying uchikoshi games of course, i just finished ai.tsf and am onto a.ini, as much as i have some gripes with it, oh well, we make our own canon - but i wanted by choice, to kinda explain that.

one thing that's really really important to me is mutual communication. that doesn't translate to: 'tell me everything that's going on and every personal detail. ' it just means, i feel that if something is up with me that's affecting my fun on the dashboard, then i wanna just bring it up.

most of my friends here know i've been having a lot of social anxiety. which is kinda weird for me since i'm a fairly confident / extroverted person! but you know what that's okay, but i've been kind of a ghost on my discord. i keep second guessing everything i say to most everyone, and it has nothing to do with a single person, there's nothing wrong i feel about any of my friends. i'm just /anxious/.

i also, am just accepting that due to some personal health issues, nothing major, (ex: insomnia amped up, for mental reasons ) that my adhd is all over the place. most of the time when i get to be home i'm snuggling my bear uh -- i mean, my rescue great pyrenees sasha or just doing 'icon therapy' which is me making batches of screencaps and converting them to icons.

i'm not ignoring anyone, and i just don't know what to really say right now in a lot of conversations. i stumble over my typing and delete little sentences because my anxiety has been so bad. but also for me, with that adhd, sitting in it is infinitely worse, and i'm sorry if this sounds like i'm complaining. i just like being upfront!

so yeah, dm buddies i'm not ignoring you, or purposefully being slow. roleplay partners / friends, new mutuals waiting on meme asks or threads, hell even mizuki's birthday stuff, which is FOREVER btw to this stan, i am not trying to make it seem i'm disinterested or quite frankly i don't drop threads unless you would like me to. i just may not be at the speed you like. and that's okay! we meet each other half way.

but yeah i kinda really have wanted to address this because i can feel mizuki kinda coming back if that makes sense? there's so much to explore with her, but even mutuals i don't even know that i dearly want to interact with, please know you can send random asks or throw people at mizuki any time. i know this isn't a job. i know not to force myself, and trust me, i don't.

but i just...didn't want to leave the wrong impression that may be 'lily's ignoring me / lily dropped our stuff / ' it isn't so much bluntly, for anyone as much as it is me wanting to tell you i just don't operate that way i guess? i wouldn't treat someone like that. everyone has their way of operating on this site and as long as it's not hurtful i think it's fair and valid. i just wanted to explain. for myself, and hopefully clear up if anyone is confused about me.

i appreciate everyone's patience and the talent they bring to the dash, even if i don't know your muse(s), but i do know that i followed you for a reason so please be patient with me as i get through this. i think writing is so relaxing for me, so slowly feeling mizuki come back is a very, very comforting thing. she's my favorite girl ever, the girl ever period for me, and i never aim to make this a job.

so i'm gonna be gentle to myself and these asks and threads you might go 'well that was ages ago' and that's okay. what's important for me is that my intentions are always clear, and hopefully, always seen as they are as best i can: well meaning. that said, since i don't wanna make this a job, please don't do it either okay? - lily.

[inkskinned]

they will need to whipstitch the wound closed, but embroidery is a "woman's" task. they will need to eat and clean and mend clothes, but why learn basic things when you can have a woman measure out your life in beads. he will be the "head" of your house, but if you want him to act accordingly, you must assign him a list of all applicable activities. you will be otherwise constantly in charge of almost-everything; so he will lead the house he is absent from.

in movies and books, the "cool" girl will be more-like-a-man. she will be "less boring," more "fun". she will have masculine ideas and masculine talents, which means a man doesn't have to change in order to find her fascinating. she will disdain of something as simple as stitching. how boring!

she will kick open the door of a car and quip what, girls can't drive? and flip her long hair down one side. she will grill and shoot a gun and skydive. be a guy. she will be sexualized.

somewhere, working on computers becomes a masculine task, and now on tv a gen-z disney character throws her hands up in the air. i can't be a computer science nerd, i'm a girl! in the real life, she will be unable to sit through some of her classes, shivering when she realizes she is the only woman present in several of them.

how many times have you read this book and seen this show and watched this movie. the singular woman is allowed 5 lines because she's not just smart! she's also pretty! she is surrounded by 20 average men, but she is stunning. she is the exception to the bland, pale lives of women-at-home, who will never be shown. she likes dirt and motorbikes and blood and shows up in a tiny dress during the final scene, rolling her eyes at our male lead's incredulity - just because i like motorcross doesn't mean anything. i'm still a woman, okay? i actually like shopping.

it is almost never reversed, and you think about that often. it is vanishingly rare to have a single man in a cast of women. the male love interest does not show up at a feminist march and sardonically squint at our leading lady - what? you thought only women care about human rights? he does not know how to balance a checkbook or kickbox because i grew up with three sisters.

when he cooks he is a chef, which is sexy. when he cleans, he's being kind, genteel. when he nurtures his family, confetti rains from the ceiling. when she does these things: it is her duty and her identity. what do you mean she has other passions and hobbies? isn't her hobby and passion homemaking?

the other day a friend embroidered a seam closed on your jacket into the shape of ivy. every time you touch it, you think of her.

something about women's hobbies and art and skills. something about women's work.

[sandflakedraws]

soft bros ft. the efforts of my unseen troll art improvement speedrun

these movies are a reminder in goober form that actually, i love music intensely

[pjs-everyday]

*immediately loses their cool* lmao 🤓 // linework >> grayscale // ko-fi

[kagooleo]

even the biggest beasts need a little love and care when they've evolved (watch your head!)

[vilnmelling]

See, the thing about Jeff's characters is that all of them look exactly like Jeff, but none of them look anything like each other.

MacNamara? Yeah, he looks like Jeff.

Man in a hurry? Clearly Jeff.

Professor Hidgens? Yup, that's Jeff.

BUT THESE THREE DON'T LOOK ANYTHING ALIKE

[abd-illustrates]

Mr.Illustrates how does it feel to know that arlecchino’s backstory and fatherly role aligns with your theory of the pyro archon?

Actual footage of me playing her story quest yesterday and hearing about the fucked up way Crucabena used to run that house:

[yudidoodles]

I knowwww this probably isn't how this bit is meant to be read but like,,, its very funny that when asked "how do flirt" they reply with how they treat each other

[tizooky]

After the crèche

Flats/No text alt under read more

[leafaske]

ermigerd, jersticer trerhert © Blizzard Entertainment 2024

[winonaparadise]

do y'all think this doodle looks like me or is it cope

[gen-toon]

your art is absolutely amazing & i truly hope mr. warburton comes across your art and hires you! if it isn't any trouble, could we see some references of sector z in love / flustered / blushing / etc?

[chalkrub]

challenging myself by engaging in the ancient art known as "dynamic poses", but making it harder on myself by ignoring the noble practice of "using references"

featuring belvedere and florawell

[halflifebutawesome]

some stuff from work ^_^

[kagooleo]

here's a finished belated bday comm for @wyvernity of their soulsilvershipping :D!!! I was honestly really happy with the turnout for the piece so I did go a lil ham on their faves (～￣▽￣)～

i've still got 2 commission slots open on my kofi for both chibi and sketch pieces if anyone is interested :V

[magicclownjuice]

Omfg them