#idk cringe and weird i dunno

[altschmerzes]

For the word game: style and/or happen and/or down

style, from the aro buck 911 fic, "never been in love"

It’s a basic information page, kind of a 101-style set of definitions from a website about different orientations. The top of the page informs the reader that it is explaining to them what ‘aromantic’ means. Buck swallows hard and scrolls a little, taking in a few words at a time. It’s a little difficult to process, because his vision seems to be fuzzing a little, static building in his ears and his heart pounding in his chest.

happen, also from "never been in love" but a little earlier on

“She keeps getting on me about my girlfriend.” He makes a face, then amends the statement. “Well, getting on me about the fact that I don’t have one. She thinks I should be dating somebody, and keeps bringing it up, just over and over. What happened last time I saw Taylor came up, and she just- I don’t know why it’s so important to her that I have a damn girlfriend, you know? And I don’t know how to tell her, at least not in any way that she’s ever going to listen to and leave me alone about, that I just- I don’t want one.”

down, from chapter 10 of "wriggle up on dry land" the baby jamie ted lasso fic

She raises an eyebrow at him, and she shifts in a moment from paging through the paper while sipping her tea and meandering around the table – more fidgety in her down time than just about anyone else Roy has ever known – and then all of her attention is focused on him. It’s amazing how she does that - it’s like in a single moment Roy’s sister switches off and Dr. Kent switches on.

[vinnyandthephenomena]

sometimes i feel weird and like its abnormal to enjoy things i like and consume media of interests then i think about it. that is normal.

[i-maybe-exist]

sometimes you rewatch lore and think “oh that was really good!!! i loved my acting, i think i embodied this character really well”

and then sometimes you rewatch lore and think “wow thats cringe”

[fruitmouse]

looking at pics of me with long hair is sooooo strange now

[piccadillyfool]

tag ramble lol nothing serious so keep walking

[quinn-pop]

frieren au where meta knight is frieren, sailor dee is fern, Magolor is stark, and Galaxia is flamme. that’s the post

[theycalledhimastar]

Thinking of Johnny, but not about how sweet or handsome he is, but all the weird shit he does. Because humanizing these guys gives me life.

☄. *.

I know for a fact that Johnny smells like Old Spice. And not the normal amount, either. Like he uses far too much, and he uses every single product they have. Shampoo, Body wash, deodorant, if they had toothpaste, he would use it. Johnny feels like the type of person to use far too many scents at once, whether it's the same or they clash, doesn't matter because it's an assault on the nose and he never seems to notice.

"Don't I smell fresh? Why ye actin' so put off?" Because you literally smell like the bodywash section of a beauty store, love. That's why.

I *also* know that this man yells, like a lot. Not even when he's upset, he's actually quiet when he is upset. But when he's excited about something, anything, he just... forgets entirely that some people have ears and aren't half bloody deaf from listening to music far too loud. Sport nights are horrible, he sounds as loud as a group of five all on his own.

He has weird ass feet too, take that as you will, his feet are just... weird. I can't describe it, you literally have a rule that he has to wear socks around the house to keep from cringing when he has the dogs out. (idk, I just feel this in my soul)

Moves around constantly, like man will not sit down for more than five minutes, not even to cuddle, he just gets handsy and uses you as a fidget toy. Not in a sexy way either, he will like squeeze the fat of your stomach or thighs like a stress ball. If you tell him to stop, he'll just kind of whine that he needs something for his hands to do.

Will wear the same tee for like, three days in a row if he thinks it isn't too dirty or smelly. Bro is a sniff test connoisseur and it'd be impressive if it wasn't a little weird. Man walks around in the same three outfits and while he looks good in anything, you... aren't really sure how to feel about his odd laundry habits. (And you really really hope that shirts are the only thing he reuses like that.)

(I dunno why I decided to make this, but I thought I was funny lol)

[papil0nglegs]

Fallen angel!Adam x Moth Healer!Reader

Chapter 3: The beautiful light

(Ch.1) (Ch.2) (Ch.3)

Warnings: Swearing, nightmares, cannibalism, and smoking

A/n: Just wanna thank all the peeps that were able to vote on the poll I made a few days ago <33 Had no idea what to do for the story so voting really helped me. Also this one’s kinda L O N G, I just had a lot of ideas for this part. (Also this song just reminded me of this fic listen to it PLS)

Adam’s pov:

Another weird ass dream, ever since I moved in this chicks hip-dip apartment I’ve been getting them. It’s mostly the day of the extermination, I can’t believe I didn’t turn back as soon as they started fighting back. Now I let everyone in heaven down, even Lute.

Whatever, I need to go wiz. I should probably stay quiet otherwise that butterfly bitch might wa-

Third dream pov (idk what to call it):

Before Adam can finish his thoughts, he looks towards the mirror, revealing his angel form but severely injured, and with a large gaping wound in his chest, surrounded by blood. Adam lets out a startled yelp, backing up against the bathroom door, awakening him.

Normal third pov:

Adam wakes up, startled at his new dream. He had still been lying on the couch, but his eyes wider than ever. He sits up, some of the leather couch sticking against his sweaty body, scratching the back of his head. The grey morning sky shined between the window blinds, he wanted to go back to sleep, but who could after a dream like that?

Adam rushes to the bathroom, quickly opening the door and turning on the lights, heading straight to the mirror. He gently touches his left horn, feeling a mix of relief but also disappointment that he’s back in his new body.

A lousy cough escapes his chapped lips, feeling that his throat is dry, and decides to get water from the kitchen tap, grabbing a mug and filling it up with water. Sure it tasted weird and warm, but he didn’t care. He chugged the nearly the whole thing in one sip, with some water spilling from the cup to his chin hairs. Adam slams the cup against the table.

Suddenly, a displeasing alarm goes off in the distance. He realizes that he’s not alone in here, what could that alarm be for tho? Y/n steps out of from her room still in her pajamas, yawning.

“Oh Adam!... What are you doing up this early?” She asks while heading to the kitchen. “I dunno man, just felt like it.” He responds in annoyance, “What are you doing up this early? You’re the one with the annoying ass alarm.”

Y/n rolls her eyes a bit while opening the fridge and taking out a box of frozen waffles, “I just have somethings to do today, so I thought I’d wake up early. I’m planning to pick up something from cannibal town.” She begins putting some waffles in a toaster while making herself a latte. “Gasp, you should totally come!!” Y/n exclaims excitedly.

Adam looks alarmed, offended even, and just stairs in confusion. “Y/n, why in the fuck, would I want to go anywhere, in this miserable place.” He says in a brutally honest manner. “I mean seriously, are you blind? Have you seen what goes on out there??” Adam pulls y/n to the window opening the blinds, revealing a guy getting his brains blown out.

Y/n cringes at the sight, “okay yeah it’s not great, but cannibal town is pretty enjoyable! Cmon you’ll see what I mean when we go there, plus you get to try out those wings of yours.” She says pointing at his scaly two scaly things, leading Adam to spread one of them a bit.

Y/n stares at Adam waiting for an answer, he sighs in annoyance, “eugh, fine I’ll go. Whatever means I can crash in here.” She then jumps in excitement, “Yess!! Also you’re going to have to pay at least half of the rent here if you wanna stay.” (He really thought 😭)

Time skip: 2hours

Adam waits on the couch waiting for y/n to finish up getting ready, y/n was lucky to find her old roommates clothes in his size. He has a leather jacket, along with black jeans and a Red Hot Chili Peppers shirt. He’s wearing the same boots he wore when he got here tho, he thought they’d look good with his jacket. Adam flinches at the sudden steps of y/n who just finished up, walking in the room.

“Sorry, I didnt scare you did I?” She says chuckling whilst brushing her hair. She had a long forest green skirt, along with a brown laced top and a cardigan that only reached her elbows. “So do you wanna fly or walk there? I can teach you how!”

Adam realizes, he has to pretend he doesn’t know how to fly, otherwise she might get suspicious. He assumes that since one angel has fallen, then there must be a shit ton. He can’t let her know that he’s the reason for the exterminations. “yeah, yeah totally totes you can definitelyteachmehowtoflymanandstuffhahahha” He rambles on while his eyebrows are furrowed and making finger guns to him, noticeably sweating his ass off.

Y/n notices this, then coming to a conclusion. “I know why you’re nervous, Adam..” She says gently, while looking up at him. Adam panics, nearly choking on his spit, “Ar-Ar you serious?”

“Yeah..

you must be afraid of heights!” She exclaimed happily, truly a eureka moment for this woman. Adam sighs in relief, the most unbearable relief anyone has ever felt. “I knew it from the moment I saw you, it’s always the tall ones.” She says shaking her head. “We don’t have to fly, Adam. It’s only a mile or two away, we’ll get there in no time!” Y/n adds picking up her messenger bag. “Now, let’s get going!” She says with a bright smile.

As they step onto the sidewalk, y/n notices that Adam seems a bit cautious. Normally when he was in hell it was to commit a massacre, not having to worry about a sinner hurting them because-well they couldn’t at the time. But now things are different, he’s one of them now.

“Relax,” Y/n starts, “just stay out of trouble, and stick with me. Oh and also watch your step, these guys are open to just taking a dump anywhere they’d like.”

The two begin to walk on the dirty sidewalk, y/n being extra careful about where she’s walking, but Adam doesn’t really mind stepping on a used condom or some junkies bag of coke.

“So, what’s it like up there?” Y/n asks, Adam gets alarmed at her question, stuttering a bit. “uuuUUP WHERE?”

“On earth! I heard that the sky is blue instead of red. And the animals there are not as scaly” y/n begins to stroke the soft hairs on her left wing, she was truly torturing this poor man. “How do the animals look here?” He asks, before y/n can respond,

splat!

A large red fleshy snake falls onto the ground, not really moving that much, just there. “I think that should answer your question” y/n then walks over the seemingly dead snake, while Adam does the same.

“So like, what do you guys do here all day?” Adam questions while sneering at the explicit posters causally displayed out in the open. “I mean, that depends on who you’re asking. Most people go on a rampage as soon as they get here, at least from what I see.” Y/n shrugs. “But sometimes you find a stable part of hell, or at least as stable as hell can be.” Adam becomes slightly intrigued about what she’s saying about hell. “Like, I work at a cafe around here. It’s nice but it’s a bit hard to keep up the wage when angels and demons wreck the place every now and then.” She says sadly, Adam feeling a wave of shame, that she has to live in constant fear while working because of others, and sometimes him.

Eventually, both y/n and Adam finally enter cannibal town. Adam being a bit wary, since he sees many familiar faces around the place, but not for good reason. Y/n then noticing, “Adam? You don’t look so good, is something wrong?” She questions. Adam begins to snap out of his cautious mode, “uhh, yeah?It’s not like on earth people are open to just eating each other out in the open-and NOT in the good way.” He scoffs, pointing to a gentlemen eating another’s guts out. “Oof, Rosie might wanna get that checked at.” Y/n says looking over at where Adam is pointing.

“And who the hell is Rosie??” Adam asks pretty loudly, “The mayor, but I’m sure she’s busy today. Anyways, I’m gonna go to the florist shop. Whole I go you can..” Y/n begins to look around, trying to find a place for Adam to get distracted, then finding a smoke store nearby. “-go to the smoke shop!” She suggests pointing nervously to the shop, hoping that her assumption wouldn’t offend him.

Adam stared at the shop for a bit, he had smoked before, but it was mostly when he was able to disguise himself as a human and go to earth. But he hasn’t done that in a while, last time he smoked he found himself passed out at the back of some hippies van. Ever since Sera made sure he was always watched whenever he went to earth.

“…yeah sure I’ll go smoke.” He submits. Y/n taking a breath of relief, “good! I’ll be in the shop if you need me” Y/n quickly gives him a nice 50, then going off to the flower shop.

Adam finishes his shopping trip pretty quickly, to be fair all he had was 50$ and the store was quite small. He just bought a bubbler and a pack of cigarettes, along with a lighter of course. He sits on a bench that had been between the two stores, then smoking one of the cigarettes.

He sat on that thing for at least 6 or 7 minutes. As he was sitting, he did notice that this place was nicer than every other part of hell. A bit weird to think about, how just a few days ago they were trying to kill each other. A huge gust of wind blows his cigar onto the floor, and into a puddle to his left. His attention is then drawn into the reflection for a few seconds, but he shrinks away from the pain of realizing he’s a demon now, and turns away closing his eyes.

After a good 9 minutes, y/n comes out with a woven basket of lavender, as well as candles with flowers inside of them. “Oh I took so long didn’t I?” She apologizes. “They just had a great sale on candles I couldn’t resist!” Y/n begins to sit down with Adam, hoping to rest a bit after standing round for a bit. “So, how have your last few days been down here?”

“Shitty. Do you have any eyeliner?” Adam replies manspreading, him being slightly slouched down. Y/n then scurries in her bag, hoping to find some. “I didn’t strike you as the type to wear eyeliner.” She chuckles, handing him the small stick along with a hand mirror. “What shape do you like putting it? I like a thin feline, it’s cute but basic.” Y/n shrugs, “Do I look like Jeffery star to you? I don’t know the fuckin species of eyeliner.” He laughs shaking his head giving himself a soft Smoke. Y/n laughs along with him, setting down the basket of lavender and candles between them.

“I got the lavender stuff for you.” Y/n says, Adam pauses, looking over at y/n. “…you’re not that smart are you?” Adam stares judgmentally, y/n taking lots of offense to his comment but keeping quiet. “Why do I need flowers right now? I don’t need a pity gift, especially if they’re some fucking flowers.” Adam scoffs. “No, they aren’t a pity gift or anything, I can tell you haven’t slept peacefully ever since you’ve gotten here.” Y/n removes a bit of the cloth on the basket to take one of the lavenders out. “These will be able to help you, I can make tea out of them and they’ll help you out. Or we can use the aromatherapy I got with it too, just in case you don’t like tea.” Y/n offers, she reaches over to gently grab Adam’s hand places it on hers.

“I know you’re going through a lot Adam. You don’t have to tell me why, but I need you to know that hiding your feelings wont do any good for you.” She explains giving a worried but weirdly comforting look at him, “so please, let me help you.”

Adam stares into y/n’s maroon and green eyes. He then feels as if a big weight of pressure left his chest, he’s never been able to have a person understand him like this. Especially when they don’t really know who he is. Tears slowly form in his red eyes, as y/n pulls him in for a hug. Feeling the warmth in her body made him feel safe in a way, that he could trust her. That she can always help him when he needs it. He didn’t know the exact words for it, but all he knew is that he hadn’t felt this way ever since Eden.

Adam’s dream pov:

Both Adam and y/n had gotten back to the house, it was a nice trip back since Adam finally trusted her a whole lot more. Once they got back y/n gave Adam some lavender tea, sure he would rather drink a cup of literal vomit than tea but he was desperate to sleep soundly for once. Hell, he could even sleep in jeans if we wanted to.

Adam practically throws himself on the couch, immediately going to sleep as soon as his cheek hits the pillow. He dreams of nothing but a void of darkness, as others do, but in that void he sees a familiar face in it, carrying a beautiful light with it. As the light came closer, it transformed into something Adam can only described as beauty.

He wasn't sure who it was tho, he's seen many women in his life, but he couldn't poke out who it was, only little things.The way she laughed, felt like small bubbles popping in his head. and her teeth coming from her smile, like beams of light, peaking through clusters and clusters of trees. And her eyes, oh her gorgeous eyes, like two pearls shining against the sunlight. Whoever it was, was truly gorgeous. But who was it?

Lilith?

Eve?

Lute?

No, it can’t be

You just met her..

Y/n? ♡

[greenerteacups]

I think that the main problem with romione is that because jkr didn't want to deal with teenage sex, they took too long to get together and it ended up looking like they are completely incompatible.

Not being able to get together for four years when you are that young, very good friends AND you are bad at hiding your feelings is a big fat red flag for romione that is hard to get over. The narrative tiptoes around it, too, everyone knew they had a thing for each other, Fred and George didn't even make fun of them.

Draco didn't make fun of them! And you know he would!

If they started dating at the end of the fourth year with Harry becoming a perpetual third wheel (or at least in the middle of the sixth year) - that would have been a realistic teenage couple that had a shot at becoming a stable couple in their adult years. Also it would have been hilarious but thats neither here nor there.

When Ron and Hermione couldn't discuss their feelings and reach a consensus even when they were on the run in the forest and the society was their best friend who approved of that relationship - that's just pathetic tbh. They just don't like each other then, come on.

With hinny I think i was just triggered by them as a child, so I can't perceive them at all. Both the description of Harry's love for her (the beast metaphor frightened me, it was so unlike Harry, although now its just feels turbo cringe), and the fact that Ginny had to change into a tomboy popular hotgirl, who occasionally behaved like she and Harry were married for 45 years at least and was never unreasonable or angry with him.... it just sucks

Yeah, I don't disagree about the Ron stuff. I dunno if it was JKR's general weirdness with romance or her not wanting Ron and Hermione to get together early because it would third-wheel Harry and fuck up the dynamic — which you have to imagine is also canonically one of their concerns, too — but it didn't hit for me. In their defense, they are usually Preoccupied With Other Shit, but after a while the bickering gets grating and it ate up so much space in substantially crowded books that I gave up on it. It's definitely realistic; kids IRL will have these miserable situationships that last all throughout high school because they're so petrified of talking about it, and sometimes that's literally all that ever happens.

The problem IMO isn't anything that Ron or Hermione actually do, it's a problem with the author not creating believable chemistry. There are few plots that believable chemistry can't fix, and only few love stories that can survive a lack of it. But chemistry is also in the eye of the beholder.

Also, I think the parts in Book 6 where they make each other jealous on purpose with Cormac and Lavender are just awful, and that's just my thing — jealousy is and can be sexy in romance fiction, but trying to invoke jealousy on purpose is just like. Not hot to me. IDK. It reads as immature and as deliberately trying to hurt the other person, which I don't... okay, well. I don't find it hot in that context.

I like Ginny and Harry together, though.

[something-in-your-walls]

ALL THE MELVINS HAVE A GROUP CHAT HERE ARE WHAT SK MELVIN HAS EACH OF THEM SAVED AS + SOME OF HIS SMALL THOUGHTS ON THEM!

“megamind” AKA Villainborg (created by @drc00l4tt4) NOTES- refuses to let me put him as a witty nickname, but i did it in secret anyway, and apparently, he’s a supervillain too

“opposite me” AKA SK PPV (created by me!) NOTES- takes after blunder sometimes, even though he’s really nice

“guilt issues” AKA Guilt Ridden Melvin (created by @airim2023) NOTES- i don't like to bother him, he sure seems to be going through it, man

“original? I think?” AKA Book Melvin NOTES- actually he’s specifically known as the ‘book version’, whatever that means

“show?” AKA Show Melvin NOTES- no witty nickname, idk what else to call him

“original borg” AKA Melvinborg NOTES- cocky bastard and I kinda admire him for that ngl “my borg” AKA Borg (created by me!) NOTES- my future self, call only if there’s an emergency

“anti-humor boy” AKA Movie Melvin NOTES- apparently he’s the ‘movie version’??? again, I still have no clue what that means

“sneedly” AKA GP Melvin (created by @n4talia-chaparro) NOTES- very very sweet, i just have to be careful abt messaging him because his krupp can and will kill me if he finds out about our chats “sneedborg” AKA GP Melvinborg (created by @n4talia-chaparro) NOTES- barely ever online and has notifications off at all times, just in case

“opposite original” AKA PPV Melvin NOTES- he’s nice enough, even if there’s barely any braincells in that empty head of his

“alien barista” AKA Livmen NOTES- he acts like he's been conditioned to follow orders, which tracks, bc according to villainborg he was enslaved a while???

“egyptian original?” AKA Melvinites NOTES- can’t be bothered to spell his dumbass name right now, i'll figure it out later

“eat the rich” AKA Melvinport Sneedlyfeller III NOTES- his name is so fucking long, plus he gets annoying QUICK when you ACTUALLY have to deal with him

“snelvin” AKA Bizarro Melvin NOTES- try to dumb stuff down for him, he is NOT good at deducing things, and honestly, I really should know this by now

“professor s” AKA Professor Sneedly (created by @warrior-of-waistbands) NOTES- very clearly does NOT like kids and also refuses to let me give him a witty nickname

“hypno” AKA Hypnostuck Melvin (created by @somepancakeonline5377) NOTES- i think he's magical or something??? and apparently he’s from a game called homestuck????

“hypnoborg” AKA Hypnostuck Melvinborg (created by @somepancakeonline5377) NOTES- im not allowed to block him for his insane ass plans for some reason??? i dunno why though, his plans are probably the most flawed out of everyone's, ngl

“nuclear nerd” AKA Chemical Overdose Melvin (created by @dib-thing-wannabe) NOTES- this kid has fucking superpowers from nuclear waste??? and I thought MY universe was weird

“90’s ‘cool dude’ stereotype” AKA Broski Melvin NOTES- pretty cool I guess, but some of his lingo makes me physically cringe at times.

“she-devil” AKA Merlin Sneedly (created by @bluartist) NOTES- acts like show, but is a girl, and i'm pretty sure that’s basically the only real difference not much to say here about her

“hellraiser” AKA Merlinborg (created by @bluartist) NOTES- merlin’s version of borg, so just borg, but a girl, basically not much to say here about her, either

“rebel roboticist” AKA Redux Robotix Melvin (created by @sketch-twentytwo) NOTES- follows the rules but doesn’t seem to find the adults all that trustworthy???

“mythbusters wannabe” AKA Lab Comix Inc Melvin (created by @infinitree) NOTES- into pranking and tends to see impossible things as a challenge, when they really REALLY aren’t

[freeuselandonorris]

hello please some unhinged mctwinks exploring the post-podium opportunities to, idk, pee on each other or sth (your pal emptyhalf)

this is a GOD TIER PROMPT and one of many reasons i treasure you.

this is 2500 words of filth. i’ll x-post it to AO3 for anyone who’d rather read there!

cw: piss kink, spit, generally gross boys being gross. don’t say i didn’t warn you !!

“You know what’s, like, actually really fucking sad,” Lando says, rolling onto his back so he’s at a weird right-angle to Oscar and craning his neck at a truly stupid angle to look up at him. 

Oscar prods him in the head with his socked foot. “Go on. I’m sure this will be very tragic.”

Lando sighs dramatically and bats at Oscar’s foot. “I feel like—how do we even celebrate this?”

They’ve been hanging out in Oscar’s bedroom for nearly three hours now and neither of them has initiated sex, which is bizarre and unnatural. Mostly it’s probably because they’re both still jet-lagged. Oscar’s had a couple of beers already—this is his only cheat day between now and the end of the season and damnit, he wants to take advantage—but largely all it’s doing is making him feel a bit sleepy.

“What do you mean,” he says, and kicks Lando gently in the head again. “Did you want a parade? Naked girls holding signs saying ‘well done Lando and Oscar’ and doing the can-can in the living room?”

“Yeah, I’d take that,” Lando says. “Wait, the can-can? Are you from the past?”

“I’m sure Zak’s planned something extremely cringe for tomorrow,” Oscar says, ignoring him. “And then you can spend an hour bitching about how much you hate it and also hate being the centre of attention.” He finishes the last mouthful of his beer, which is warm and slightly foamy. 

Lando groans and flops his arms over his face. “You know how most of them celebrate? I bet George gets, like, a blowjob. That’s his special treat.” The disdain dripping from his voice is something else. He grabs Oscar’s foot and rubs it over his face, because he’s fucking disgusting like that. Oscar’s not a foot guy but he’ll allow it. “Like, a Tuesday for us is basically birthdays and anniversaries for them.”

“‘Them,’” Oscar echoes, putting his empty bottle down so he can do the air quotes. 

Lando puts Oscar’s toes into his mouth and chews at them thoughtfully. He really is fucking vile. Oscar’s so fucking fond of him. He curls his toes against Lando’s teeth and then pulls away, grimacing at the feeling of wet sock. 

“Normals,” Lando says, and wriggles up to straddle Oscar. “Yanno. The straights.”

Oscar rolls his eyes but grabs Lando by the hips. They tussle briefly, until Oscar gets a hand under Lando’s hoodie and tweaks his nipple, making him yelp and squirm pleasingly over Oscar’s semi. “So you’re saying you’re sad because you’re having too much good sex and you got a podium? Fuck up, mate.”

Lando grins down at him, tongue running along the edges of his sharp little teeth. “I’m just saying. A blowie doesn’t feel like a fitting tribute.” 

He has to stifle a giggle as he says ‘blowie’. Oscar scrunches his nose. 

“Maybe we need to move onto the weird stuff,” he says idly, stretching his arms out above his head and grabbing the headboard so his t-shirt rides up. Predictably, Lando takes the hint and shoves it the rest of the way up to his armpits, licks a broad hot stripe down his sternum.

“What do you mean, weird stuff,” says Lando against his right pec, sounding hurt. “I thought we already did weird stuff.” 

To prove his point, he lifts his head just far enough to spit, saliva dripping from his pursed lips to run in a hot trickle down the dip of Oscar’s stomach. Lando catches it with his tongue before it runs into his navel, licking it back up.

“You are so fucking vile,” Oscar says, like his cock’s not jumping in his sweatpants. “I dunno, you came second, didn’t you? Dealer’s choice.”

Lando pushes himself up then, squinting at Oscar. “Anything I want,” he says, sing-song like he’s testing the waters. His eyes are gleaming.

“Within reason,” Oscar amends. Just in case. To get things moving along a bit faster, he wriggles out of his t-shirt.

Lando tips his head to one side, thoughtful. 

“You look like a really stupid dog when you do that,” Oscar tells him, and Lando punches him in the stomach, then immediately undermines his effort to seem offended by tipping himself forward and bracing himself with his hands either side of Oscar’s head so he can rub himself off against Oscar’s thigh. 

“Right,” he says, gazing right at Oscar from about four inches away. He’s got annoyingly beautiful eyes, which is a problem because it makes it very hard for Oscar to deny him anything at all, ever. Thank God they race with helmets on. “I wanna piss in your lap.”

It’s so far removed from what Oscar had been expecting to hear—it’s not even a combination of words he’s entirely sure makes sense together—that he splutters into laughter, accidentally knocking their foreheads together. Lando makes a high, offended noise and bites at his jaw.

“That’s not a thing,” Oscar tells him, letting Lando kiss him briefly, tongues sliding messily across each other.

“Yes it is,” Lando says when he pulls back. “I saw it on xHamster.” He bites at Oscar’s top lip, a sharp nip, then sits up, bratty and dishevelled. “C’mon, you said anything I wanted and I wanna try this.”

He’s already tugging at the drawstrings of his sweatpants. Oscar shoves his hands away, trying not to get distracted by the heavy shape of his cock distending the front of them. “Whoa. No piss on the bed, fuck off.”

Lando actually pouts at that, like Oscar’s being somehow unreasonable. Oscar loses his internal battle and cups him through his joggers, rubbing the head with his palm. Lando’s eyelashes flutter pleasingly. 

“Fine—ah—fine, we’ll go in the bath then,” he says. His voice has gone slightly breathy already. He’s so easy for it. “Here, bring that blanket for us to lie on.” 

He waves a hand at the grey blanket thrown over the chair Oscar uses for laundry storage. “Oh, come on,” Oscar says. “My mum bought that.”

Lando shrugs and slithers off Oscar’s lap to check the label. “Here,” he says, waving it triumphantly. “Machine washable, 40C.” He pronounces it like sees. Probably he’s never met a washing machine in his life. 

Oscar lifts his hands in defeat. “Fine. Go on.” 

It feels extremely silly watching Lando spread the blanket out across the bottom of the bath and then lying down on it while Lando pulls his hoodie off, trying to keep all the tender bits of his body out of Lando’s way while he gets himself in and straddles Oscar’s lap. It’s not a bad-sized bath, but it’s not really built for two. 

He pulls his knees up slightly so Lando’s tipped slightly forward, one hand steadying himself on Oscar’s shoulder, their erections snug against each other with layers of fabric in between.

“This better be worth it,” he says when Lando’s finally got himself settled. “So much admin.” 

He can’t help but rock up into the warm weight of Lando across his hips. Lando beams down at him, grinding against him so hard it’s on the verge of crushing his balls, but in a good way, somehow. Oscar lets his head fall back against the bathtub with a dull thunk.

“Alright, alright,” Lando says, breathing noisily. “Shut up, yeah, let me just—“ 

It’s actually happening, Oscar realises with a senseless thrill down his spine. Half of him hadn’t really believed Lando was going to actually do it, had assumed he’d just named the grossest thing he could think of to fuck with Oscar’s head. Which is probably still true, but.

Lando bites his bottom lip and squirms, screwing his face up. Oscar’s gaze flicks down between their legs just in time to see a wet spot appear on Lando’s sweats, darker green against the neon. 

“Fuck,” Oscar says involuntarily, feeling himself flush. His cock kicks in his pants for no discernible reason. 

Lando squawks and hits him in the chest. “Don’t commentate!” He writhes, looking briefly agonised. “Oh, you prick. I’ve lost it now. Fuck.”

“Oh my god,” Oscar mutters. “Look, I’ll shut my eyes until you get going, yeah?”

He does so, lifting his hands to cover his eyes. He listens to Lando grumbling under his breath and shifting around on top of him, and then everything goes still and silent. Oscar’s about to take his hands away and ask if everything’s okay, but then Lando lets out a sudden rush of held breath and his fingers tighten on Oscar’s shoulders. 

Nothing happens for a second, and then the wetness soaks through Oscar’s joggers and he lets out a strangled gasp.

It’s—not good exactly, but it’s intense. Lando’s grinding lightly against him as he pisses, drenching them both at once. It’s hotter than he’d have expected, both in terms of the temperature of it and the way it makes his cock twitch as his pants begin to stick to him. 

And then he opens his eyes and looks at Lando’s face. 

He can’t stop his little groan: Lando looks the same way he does when Oscar’s fucking him, head tipped back, bottom lip caught between his incisors, flash of tongue visible behind. 

Oscar looks down the line of their bodies, at the soaking patch covering both of their laps, the sodden fabric clinging to the outline of Lando’s erection. He reaches out and covers it with his hand, squeezing him through the dripping fabric, letting it run over his hand. It looks utterly obscene through the wet fabric. He’s really unfairly hung for someone who looks in all other respects like a particularly ripped 12-year-old. Maybe it’s a perspective trick.

Lando slits open his eyes, gazing down at Oscar. He looks fucked-out already, and Oscar grabs at his thighs to give himself more leverage to grind himself up. Lando laughs, a rough sound low in his throat, and shoves his soaked sweatpants down his hips far enough to get his cock out and piss all over Oscar’s stomach.

It’s the wrongness of it that’s the turn-on, Oscar thinks distantly, stomach twitching under the stream. It’s viscerally filthy in a way that he’ll probably have a crisis over later, but right now he couldn’t give a fuck.

“Up a bit,” he says, surprising them both. Lando inhales sharply, the ragged edges of his fingernails biting into Oscar’s shoulder where he’s still holding himself steady with his free hand. He adjusts his angle, sending a stream across Oscar’s chest. It pools into the hollow of his neck, running back into his hair. 

Oscar opens his mouth, sticks out his tongue just a bit.

“Oh, you’re nasty,” Lando murmurs, delighted. Oscar raises his eyebrows, curling his tongue. It’s always nice to shock Lando. Rare, but nice.

Lando has to kneel up a bit, slipping on the wet blanket beneath them, and the loss of contact to his dick absolutely fucking sucks, but it’s worth it for his expression when he manages to hit Oscar’s cheek and chin and spray across his tongue.

Oscar splutters a bit, more at the sensation than the taste—it’s not really getting far enough into his mouth to actually taste it, just spitting it back down his chin, letting it run down. Lando’s eyes are blank and unfocused with pleasure, mouth hanging open. Oscar does his best to hold his gaze. 

“Fucking gross,” Lando affirms as his stream begins to slow to a trickle, dribbling over his fingers and Oscar’s stomach. He says it like the highest of compliments. His pupils are blown, and he grins loose and pleased before he tips in to kiss Oscar hard, mouth running over his wet skin. 

“Your fucking idea,” Oscar says into his mouth, laughing—he can barely get the words out, muffled by Lando sticking his tongue down his throat. 

He’s jerking off fast an eager, arm moving so fast Oscar can feel the movement of it through his thighs. Oscar pushes wet hands into his hair, holding him in place as Lando’s mouth falters against his. He’s definitely gonna have beard burn from Lando’s appalling facial hair, but whatever. 

Lando moans into his mouth and comes all over Oscar’s stomach. The mess of it immediately begins to slide down Oscar’s side and he sends yet another mental apology to his mum’s blanket before grabbing Lando by the hips and yanking him down to sit on his dick.

Yelping, Lando drops his forearm to Oscar’s shoulder, one hand wrestling his softening cock back into his pants before Oscar accidentally squashes him. Oscar fights him down, thrusting up greedily and trying to pin Lando in place. His brain is wiped clean of all impulses except grinding Lando’s arse against his soaking, trussed-up dick until he comes.

For all he sometimes acts like he doesn’t know what to do with his limbs when he’s not in the car, Lando’s got surprisingly good hip action. Their stomachs slip against each other, slick with Lando’s come. Oscar claws at the small of his back, plants his feet and shoves his hips up to meet each roll of Lando’s. 

Lando giggles and shoves three fingers between his parted lips, fucking Oscar’s mouth, smearing spit. Oscar doesn’t even feel bad that he bites down when he comes into his pants, Lando pinned down so hard against him he can hardly breathe.

They sort of collapse against each other once Oscar’s finished shaking and whimpering and sucking on Lando’s fingers to muffle the more embarrassing noises threatening to get out. All at once, Oscar becomes aware that he feels absolutely disgusting. His mouth tastes vaguely of salt. 

“Wow,” Lando says after a minute. It takes him a couple of attempts to sit up properly. He looks like Oscar feels: a bit shell-shocked, a lot fucked-out. 

“You’re doing the washing,” Oscar mumbles, wiping his mouth with the back of one hand. Lando grins and ducks down to kiss him again, sweeter now. 

“Just leave it all in here and we’ll shower and rinse it all off in one go,” he says, shuffling back until he can offer Oscar a hand to pull him up. “And then we can go lie down and I’ll explain why all your opinions about the new Counter-Strike are wrong.”

“Sounds good,” Oscar says a bit blearily. One thing you can say in Lando’s favour is he doesn’t mind if you nap through his infodumps.

Lando smiles at him in a way that looks worryingly fond and drags himself up to sit on the edge of the tub so he can unhook the shower head and get the water running warm. 

“I’d better get thinking,” he says contemplatively.

“About what?” Oscar says, trying to struggle out of his wet pants. He’s gonna get clean and drag himself to bed and sleep for about four hours, and then he’s gonna make Lando fuck him through the mattress.

Lando smirks and aims the shower at his face. “About what I’m gonna do to you when I win.”

[pupplaylogan]

Breeding, ropeplay, scientist roleplay, beimg cucked :3

~ami

breeding

No | rather not | I dunno | I guess | Sure | Yes | FUCK yes | Oh god you don’t even know |

i didnt even realise i had a breeding kink til i talked abt logan having one . i jusr want him 2 get pregnant so bad

roleplay

No | rather not | I dunno | I guess | Sure | Yes | FUCK yes | Oh god you don’t even know |

scientist roleplay

No | rather not | I dunno | I guess | Sure | Yes | FUCK yes | Oh god you don’t even know |

I DONT KNOW HOW I FEEL ABT RPING?? like. it makes me laugh & i find it so silly 2 imagine roleplaying NEHRKFNJD which obviously rping is very fine & im not kinkshaming & its nothing 2 b embarrassed abt, it just embarrasses me 2 think abt bcuz i am just self conscious abt everything so the concept of roleplaying makes me embarrassed idk im crazy. i do like scientists though

cucking

No | rather not | I dunno | I guess | Sure | Yes | FUCK yes | Oh god you don’t even know |

I HAVE SUCH MIXED FEELINGS ON CUCKING like i dont like it when its used as a punishment . even though thats literally what cucking is. its so weird i love cucking & im so turned on by it but actually Imagining it happening makes me cringe bcuz i hate cheating (its Not cheating i am not calling i5 cheating) & then when i try 2 imagine scenarios w/ the sides its like . so weird trying 2 combat my feelings on cucking bcuz i would LOVE 2 write an ana///lo///ceit cucking fic but it makes me cringe 2 imagine it used as a form of punishment or2 degrade or something does this make any amn of sense . i want logan 2 be forced 2 watch his bf virgil fuck another man in front of him but not in a like . "i have 2 fuck someone else cuz ur so useless" sort of way (i dont think logan would enjoy that in thr 1st place) but like . like a . i dont even know what other way there is . i think i just like open relationships /SILLY

[aechlys]

Part of me half wonders if the "tourism problem" in japan has been a real thing, or is just a brief amnesia to what actual tourism levels have always normally been since covid restrictions have worn off and isolation is over.

I also believe that, due to renewed freedom, travelers have forgotten what it's like to be a guest while on vacation because of covid and that that could cause some bumps in the road.

I pulled up some live cams just now, mostly because I want to see what everyone's wearing these days, and while shibuya looked 100% business as usual, there was a kabuki-cho cam that had foreigners walking around. Which both is and isn't weird since it's a neighborhood that tends to love trouble, but it was also 5:30am. And then I recalled that that's when everyone gets booted out because the trains come back on- even one japanese girl walked out of a place clearly wasted after saying bye to her friends lol. But there was a gaggle of foreigners dressed cringe, whatever, and they were also a bit loud but IF they had also been out the whole night I kinda can't begrudge them too much? (because me and my friends were also fucking loud leaving karaoke wasted at 5:30am in college lmfao) They didn't look drunk tho lol.

Idk...like I'm trying to examine this as objectively as possible. I always always blend in as much as possible, and the cringe gaijin are always a fucking embarrassment, but they've *always* been there and *always* been a problem, especially in Tokyo. Japanese folks aren't saints, they also get up to crude and cringe shit- some of it the same as the foreigners, some of it just a different flavor but no less embarrassing- and the usual mariah carey "I don't know her" double standard has always been a cultural problem. So i dunno......

[reduceduranium]

Dude I'm kinda panicking and am not sure what to do.

Tw(?): might be delusional? Idk what to think of this and am just looking for advice.

Okay, so I don't know what to do.

People have been harder for me to trust, when logically, I have no reason to not trust them.

But on the other hand, people I know have been kinda telling me info that I keep to just specific friends or even just stuff that I keep to myself.

Ex: talking to my mom, and she told me something THAT I JUST told to a friend. Like haven't told to anyone before then. Like my stuff was being monitored.

The issue is I KNIW that's not possible cause my mom barely knows how to use a computer.

Also I've really been wanting to wreck my image and how I'm viewed, as well as getting a bunch of intrusive thoughts based around that, manipulating ppl, or just straight up them hurting me or me hurting them. It's weird and it sucks.

Partially unrelated to this a server I was in was recently deleted. (which is sad. Cause I absolutely loved the server, not saying what the server was for, for privacy reasons, close friends and/or ppl who were on it might know.) And it turns out they kinda didn't trust me, which really sucks cause I loved them. But I do understand and don't blame them, there was a lot going on. The issue is, cause of this ig paranoia I've been dealing with around reality or w/e is that I've been trying to go out of my way to act more real, and even I notice how cringe and fake that attempt to act normal/real is. So idk that may be part of the reason they didn't fully trust me.

And once again, this also kinda contributes to the whole idea of everything (reality and stuff) exists only in my head. Maybe everything's just crashing like sensory overload, or not having any storage left, lmao. I dunno I just need help

[poolpvrty]

I'm really tempted to post some non marauders/harry potter art on here bc i enjoy a myriad of things and media, but idk if any of it would fit the vibe. Or if anyone would even enjoy that BECAUSE!! in the pursuit of semi-total honesty, I do dabble in some cringe (?) things

i guess some examples would be stills from movies/ shows i love, original art, childrens books (e.g. where the wild things are, tales of pixie hollow, strawberry shortcake), or like... i dunno obscure internet horror? ocs? weird interests i've had since i was 13?

yeahh i really can't decide. answer if you feel like it, it's fine if you don't but i would appreciate any input!! :)

[valleyfthdolls]

I randomly thought about how funny it would be if my CTW au met yours. How would that play out lmao-

I feel like my AU versions of them are so weird it would be hard for them to even know what to MAKE of each other-

In particular I wonder how our Millies would get on. Mine is kind of a typical goth/emo girl, where yours is more into Japanese gothic lolita from the looks of it. While that does have goth ties it’s more inspired by the Japanese goth and visual kei scene of the 1990s, and my Millie would probably assume that yours was not “really goth” and wouldn’t “get her” as an emo goth. I can see her being super passive aggressive, giving your Millie the cold shoulder and saying shit like “I dunno what music you listen to, if you’re into any real goth stuff… me personally, I listen to a lot of just real obscure and underground emo and goth bands… like My Dying Bride, Motionless in White, Switchblade Symphony… they’re all really deep in the scene though… you probably haven’t heard of them if you’re only in it for the fashion……” and your Millie looking fucking dead inside waiting for the perfect time to cut her off by telling her to shut her black lipstick lined mouth to make it as biting as possible

As with any other version of Millie, it would take mine time to warm up to yours, but because yours doesn’t seem to have quite as aggressive a personality as my Millie and Mod’s, they probably aren’t trying to kill each other during that time, just tear one another down psychologically with backhanded comments.

Idk enough about your Dylan and Brooke, but I think our Brookes share the very “well meaning and genuinely sweet but still comically basic” energy, but mine has a bit more cringe kid underneath. She, Dylan and Hannah would probably all get along, but my Hannah might be confused by the positive relationship yours has with your Millie, because mine hasn’t thought much of their friendship since they grew apart, and remembers her in a very neutral way.

Our Millie’s grandpas would have so much shit to deal with though, like you have my Millie, Brooke, Dylan, and heck you could probably throw Sarah and even Abby in there too, then your Millie, Brooke, Dylan, and Hannah, plus two Funtime Freddies, one of which seems to basically just be a god awful and completely deranged adult figure who cannot be trusted around kids and the other of which is a four year old in a fifty year old robot body ready to maim at all times