#idk like in my mind. calum would say yellow.

[daydadahlias]

Hey Jess, as a person who gets curious about hyper specific stuff, I wanted to know what color that yellow/brown-ish sweater was listed as by the designer. I wasn’t trying to be pretentious or something when calling it cognac, btw; it’s a regularly used description in my language, like you would use tan for leather, or dogs in English.

So anyway, I hopped on the John Varvatos site and saw that they call it copper. The cream white one from the beach selfie is listed as charcoal/turtle dove. Now on sale for a mere $235 (from $465). Wasn’t expecting precious little bean to be able to afford that on a music teacher salary. 😉

hello bestie

in this alternate universe, our precious lil' bean got that shirt from a good will <3 just like i actually got an almost exact replica of Ashton's very own yellow/brownish/copper sweater a few months ago for 6 dollars <33

[wastelandcth]

idk if you write angst but could you write an angsty piece of the reader and cal fighting? cal is the dude to not fight and talk it out but maybe they have a fight they never really had before and it kinda goes to shit? the reader leaves for a few hours, leaves her phone at home so she can’t call anyone when she realizes it’s too late and cal calls the boys/girl’s to help find her and it results in seeing the reader a mess bc she thinks her and cal are over but they’re not and it ends in fluff?

okay this was one of my favorite things i’ve written lately so i hope you like this! also...maybe smut?? idk it’s probably not smut but also alluding to smut so 🤷🏻‍♀️

Movie Moments

"Hey man...have you or your missus heard anything from her? I...she hasn't come back home yet and it's getting pretty late." Calum mumbled into the phone as he rubbed his face, leaning back against the couch, "I was thinking maybe she'd gone over to talk to one of the girls but Ash and Mike said they haven't seen her today and neither have their girls. I just, I don't know what to do at this point." he sighed, looking over as he heard Duke whimpering at his feet, the old dog sensing his worries.

Thinking about it now, it had been a stupid fight. A fight that had been bubbling up for days now and Calum had the chance to nip it in the beginning but he was too stubborn of a person to be the first one to break again. He felt like it was always him fucking up and having to apologize for a disagreement. This time it wasn't even that much of his fault, to begin with. So their week began with a rocky start, both of them tiptoeing around each other as they tried to keep the impending fight at bay.

It started when she had left her laptop on the couch again. It wasn't anything intense, just her laptop on the couch. But Calum had gotten home exhausted from the studio and landing back onto the laptop didn't improve his mood, his backache the next morning just adding to his bad mood. Then when he'd left his running shoes near the doorway and she'd tripped and almost fallen on the ground, she couldn't help but utter out a few curse words, kicking the shoes back into the bedroom. But it didn't matter, because when she'd walked out the door at the end of their dumb fight, Calum knew he'd fucked up just as much as her.

"I just don't understand why you're so stubborn and won't accept the fact that I'm trying to help you out here! It's all I ever want to do, help you!" Calum winced at the own harshness of his voice, the thunder in the background making them both jump, "I want to make sure you're okay and that you don't do something stupid!"

Her life felt like a movie sometimes. Sometimes it felt like a teen coming of age movie when she and Calum were driving in the car with the windows down and some upbeat song came on to remind them that they were alive and together in this crazy world. Sometimes it felt like a romance movie, whenever she and Calum kissed and her world stopped because when Calum kissed her she felt like it was just her and Calum in the entire universe. Sometimes her life felt like a shitty romance movie, where the couple gets into a big fight and one of them gets stuck in the rain trying to deal with their feelings.

"I just don't understand why you're like this sometimes! Like, am I not enough for you?! I've tried, I've tried to become the best person I can become and you still treat me like I'm this...like I'm some dumb child who doesn't know how to take care of themself. I'm not a child, Calum! I'm a fucking adult, yeah I may be younger than you and you've seen more of this world than I can ever possibly imagine but you're no better than me. Deep down your just like me, you're just a fuck up who's scared to admit it and I'm just...I'm sick of having to tiptoe around this." her hands were shaking at this point, her hair sticking to her forehead as the rain kept falling around them.

Calum watched as she walked back inside of the house, the storm outside dulling into a sprinkle, not that it mattered much since they had both been soaked already. He watched as she grabbed her bag and her keys off of the counter and made her way towards the front door. He could've stopped her, he knew that if he went in there and apologized that she wouldn't leave, that they'd be able to talk things out. But Calum was being stubborn and he wasn't going to defend himself for wanting to take care of her, it wasn't like he was telling her she wasn't capable of doing so.

She was lost. The winding streets of the city leaving her confused and helpless. She really wished she had remembered to bring her phone when she had stormed out of the house but in her haste to leave, she'd left it. She could imagine it too, the clear case showing off the yellow phone and the polaroid picture of Calum and Duke that she had put there a few months ago, sitting on the coffee table where she had set it down before they'd walked outside to talk. It was probably dead by this time too, since she hadn't charged her phone since the night before. But now she had no way of knowing where she was or how to get back, the moonlight being blocked by the rain clouds that seemed to be mocking her. She could've walked to Ashton's house, maybe even Luke's since they were nearby their own house, but she couldn't face them, she couldn't face anyone at the moment. She'd decided on walking, to clear her mind, and try not to ruin what she had with Calum by saying something she didn't mean while angry. But the rain disoriented her and now she was sat on the curb, her jeans wet, her shoes soaked, and her tears being hidden by the raindrops falling around her.

She could've knocked on the door of whoever’s curb she was currently sitting on, ask them to use their phone to call Calum or one of her friends, but the idea of being kidnapped by them or worse would just prove Calum right and even in her panic she didn't want to deal with him saying 'I told you so' at her funeral. So instead she sat in silence, her body shaking from the cold as she tried to come up with a plan. She could've gone to the main road, tried to find a payphone, but it was late and she didn't really want to bump into the crowds of partying tourists and college students who flooded the night clubs during the weekends. She had been walking for what seemed like hours, she could've been in an entirely new city for all she knew, her sore feet protesting as she stood up to keep walking.

Bright headlights made her eyes squint as she made her way down yet another hilly neighborhood. Her body stiffening as she noticed the car flashing their lights at her and pull up next to her. Her breathing quickened as she prepared herself to bolt, her blood going cold as she imagined the worse. Calum really would've been upset at her funeral if she died like this. Relief flooded her as she heard a familiar Australian accent, watching as Luke parked the car and stepped out, his arms wrapping around her tightly and murmuring how he was glad to find her.

"You want to talk about it?" Luke asked softly as he glanced over at her while he drove them back home. It had been a few minutes since Luke had seen her walking down the steep hill, a few minutes after he'd called Calum and told him that he'd found her and she was safe. She found herself sitting in Luke's passenger seat, the seat warmer doing wonders for her shivering body. She shrugged, looking down at her hands as she thought about what she could say to the blonde.

"I'm not the best with directions, LA is stupid big and I got lost. I personally blame whoever made this city with so many hills and houses that look alike," she mumbled as she looked out the window, smiling weakly as she heard Luke scoff, which she hoped was more of a laugh. "Big cities are the worst. How is he?" she asked as they pulled into the driveway, her eyes landing on Calum who was stood outside of the front door waiting for them, his shoulders relaxing as he saw the car pull in.

"I'm sorry," she mumbled as she stepped out of the car, not expecting to be engulfed into Calum's arms the second she was out. Her arms wrapped around his body, her eyebrows furrowing as she felt his body shake and his uneven breathing on her neck. "C-Calum? I'm okay, I promise. I just got lost and...you were right. I can't take care of myself I'm sorry..." she rambled nervously and held him closer to her, her hand rubbing his back as she tried to calm him down. She'd only ever seen him cry a handful of times and it had never been because of her, the guilt rising up her body as Calum led her inside, thanking Luke as he got back into the car and drove off, giving you both the space you needed.

She followed Calum inside, the quiet house they'd both become accustomed to felt suffocated. The tension heard in their footsteps and in between Calum's sniffles. Her eyes looked towards the coffee table, a sigh leaving her as she saw her phone. She watched him as he walked around the kitchen, getting them both a glass of water and turning off the lights, something he'd do every night before bed. She followed him down the hallway to their bedroom, watched as he set the glasses down on the bedside table before he walked into the bathroom. She slid off her shoes as she heard the shower turn on, walking in to find Calum sliding off his damp shirt. His skin felt like fire against her cold fingertips, helping him slide the shirt up his torso before it fell to the floor with a thud. His eyes met hers, both of them tired and full of sadness as his fingertips played with the hem of her shirt, slowly pulling it off to join his on the floor.

The bathroom had steamed up by the time they'd both stepped into the shower, soft apologies whispered in between kisses. Her back was against the wall, her hands gripping his hair as she gave herself to him. His hands squeezed at her soft skin, the warm water enveloping both of them as they drank each other in. They moved as if they were made for one another, one of his hands holding one of hers above their heads as he left a trail of kisses down her jaw, his mouth whispering against her skin the words he only mumbled to himself when she was asleep. Her free hand tugged on his dark curls, soft moans leaving her as she listened to him, her body on fire as she wondered how she could have ever doubted that this was what she wanted for the rest of her life.

Laying in bed, the rain outside was different. It no longer felt like a movie moment to her. She was no longer stuck in a shitty romance movie. She was lying in the arms of her lover. Listening to his soft breathing as his chest rose and fell with sleep. No, her life no longer felt like that movie anymore, it felt like a dream she didn't want to wake up from. It felt like a poem she never wanted to stop reading. It felt like home, it felt like Calum.

[calpalirwin]

Confessions

Summary: Anon request- I may have sent this request to you last week so if I did just ignore me. 🤦🏻‍♀️ So I NEED a one shot/fic where Luke’s twin sister just got out of a bad relationship and comes on tour with the boys. Luke is really protective over her and he finds out she’s been dating/sleeping with Ashton behind his back. Idk why I’ve had this story in my mind forever but I’m a horrible writer. 😂 Thanks!!

A/N: Thanks for the request! Gave the reveal some fluff because the idea of the brothers hating the boyfriend dating their sister always rubbed me the wrong way.

Content: Abuse, protective dynamics

Word Count: 3.3k

And away and away we go!

__

“Is there anybody you’d like us to call?” the nurse asked her.

Leia Hemmings shook her head. She couldn’t tell her family about this. Not that they wouldn’t rally behind her, but because despite all the pain Wyatt Miller had caused her, she didn’t want to return the favor. Wyatt could break her ribs, but he could never break her spirit which was to love with all she had.

“Do you have a safe place to go?” was the follow up question.

Leia nodded. “Yeah. I’m good.”

The nurse pushed a few pamphlets for domestic abuse services and women’s shelters into her hand anyway. “I’m going to sign your discharge papers, but feel free to stay in here as long as you need, okay?”

Leia let out a sigh of relief as the nurse left her. She was grateful that for all her stupidity, she had kept her apartment, not giving into Wyatt’s demands for her to move in with him. It had earned her three broken ribs and the worst bruising of her life, but she was steadfast that in all her bad decisions with Wyatt, that wasn’t one of them. That being said, she knew she couldn’t stay at her apartment. So with shaking fingers, she dialed her brother.

“Hey!” Luke greeted happily, picking up on the first ring.

“Hey,” she answered.

“What happened?” he asked, detecting the slight wobble in her voice.

“Wyatt and I broke up,” she whispered, offering up the simplest part of the truth.

“Oh, Leia” was the heartbroken response.

“It’s fine, Luke. I’m fine. It just… uh… gonna need to get a new place.”

“Shit,” he cursed. “What happened?” The question was repeated with a much sterner tone than the first time.

“It didn’t end well. It’s fine. Hey, I gotta go. But we’ll talk later to make plans for when you’re back out here, yeah?”

“Yeah, of course. Hang in there.”

“Who was that?” Ashton asked as Luke ended the call.

“Leia. Wyatt and her broke up.”

“Fuck. Is she okay?” He had always liked Leia, more so than the other siblings of his bandmates. It was something in the way she held herself in a manner that made her seem older but still clung to the childhood innocence that spoke to him right from the get go.

“I don’t think so.”

“How can I help?”

~~~

“I’m fine!” she huffed for the millionth time.

“No, you’re not. You’re coming with me. End of discussion.” Even through Facetime she could see the hard glint in his eyes. As the youngest boy, Luke had learned the mannerisms of getting his way. But Leia was the only girl, and the baby by five minutes. And she could be just as stubborn as he was, if not more.

“I’m fine at home with Mum and Dad.”

“Fine with sulking in bed you mean?”

“Oh, because sulking on a tour bus is so much better? C’mon, Lu-lu,” she pleaded, using a nickname only she had ever called him. “I’m just gonna bring everybody down. It’s better if I stay here.” At home with her parents, she could hide the bruises on her body better. At a week, the bruises only looked worse, making her more certain of her decision to hide it from her family. All they knew was that her and Wyatt had broken up and that she was looking for a new apartment to get a fresh start. And that was the way she wanted it.

“Le-le,” he used, using her nickname only he had ever called her in retaliation, his blue eyes pleading softly. “You’re not gonna bring anybody down. We want you with us.”

“Really?” she asked, trying to keep the hope out of her voice and remain skeptical. She didn’t get a lot of time with Luke these days, what with his band constantly traveling and him living on the other side of the globe. And she always got along with his bandmates, especially Ashton. But ten months of touring? It had been a long time since she had spent that large amount of time in such a confined space with her twin brother. Add three other fully grown men and a crew to the mix? Well, it would be a good way to ensure a certain you-know-who stayed far away from her mind.

He was still talking as her mind went through her thoughts. “So you’ll just meet us at the show and we’ll go from there. Le-le? Leia! Are you listening?”

Her long blonde curls shook with her head as she cleared her thoughts. “Sorry, what was that?”

Luke’s eyes rolled in feigned annoyance. “Our first leg starts in Sydney. So you don’t have to worry about traveling to us. You can just meet us at our first show and we’ll go from there.”

“Yeah, I just have to worry about my job… Not all of us can just pack up and leave, Lucas...”

“Hey!” was the hurt and offended retort. “You think that I don’t miss always being there for you like when we were kids? God, Leia, if I could be there all the time, don’t you think I would?”

“Alright, alright!” Leia huffed, feeling her eyes water at his sentiment. “It’s okay. We’re okay. I’m okay.”

“Well, I think the family can handle running Hemm Clothing without you for a while. And you can put those marketing skills to use by helping Andy and Ryan with merch?”

“Wow, way to sweeten the deal…” The eye roll was playful.

“So is that a yes? You’ll come?”

“See you in a few days, Lu-lu.”

~~~

“Fancy seeing you here,” a voice breathed and Leia’s body tensed.

“Get away from me,” came the barely audible reply through clenched teeth as her vision blurred with unwanted tears.

“Came to see big brother play?” was the sneer. “Think he’s gonna protect you from up there?” Wyatt’s head nodded towards the stage.

“I don’t need protection…” She threw as much malice and venom as she could muster behind the words but her shaky voice betrayed the fear that had seized her body.

The laugh was anything but humorous as it entered her ear.

“Go away. Please…”

“Aw, c’mon. Aren’t we having fun?”

“Hey, she said leave,” a voice barked and a tall figure strode toward the pair. Two shocks of pitch black hair framed the set of hazel eyes as Ashton’s large arms crossed in front of him as he tried to come across as menacing as possible. Leia felt herself relax at the sight of him alone. “Now leave, or I’ll gladly call security to throw you out,” Ashton used his slight height advantage to tower over Wyatt. “On second thought, I think I’ll just throw you out myself. Save security the trip.”

Wyatt, smart enough not to start a fight in public, muttered under his breath about how this wasn’t over and slunk off.

Ashton’s demeanor dropped the tough guy act and his hand was soft as it rested on Leia’s shoulder. His voice was equally soft as it asked, “Hey, you alright?”

Leia looked up at him and shook her head before letting out a blubbering wail.

Ashton’s eyes went wide before he was wrapping the younger woman in a tight hug. “Hey, it’s okay. Shh. He’s gone. I got ya.”

She froze, her body tensing immediately, and when her face involuntarily flinched, Ashton dropped his hold, a wave of disgusted horror washing over him. When Leia had called Luke up to tell him about her breakup with Wyatt, she had severely downplayed the damage he had inflicted if she was jumping away from a touch she knew she could trust. His heart shattered in his chest for her and he knew he had to keep this from Luke the same way she had. The look of pity in his eyes as she turned to look at him made her throat close up. “Please don’t tell, Luke,” was the pleaded request of a woman who was barely holding it together.

“Hey, look at me,” he implored and blurry blue met steady gold. “I’m going to get security to make sure he stays far away from you. He’s never getting near you again. I promise.”

“Ash, you can’t promise that. Eventually I have to come home. And he’ll be waiting. And the longer he was to wait, the angrier he’s going to get. And the angrier he gets…”

“I wouldn’t promise it if I didn’t think I could keep it. I’ll figure something out.”

“Promise me you won’t tell Luke.”

“I won’t,” he said, holding up his pinky. “But why didn’t you? Why didn’t you tell him the truth?”

“Because it makes me feel weak? Because I feel like I should’ve known better? That I should’ve fought harder? Take your pick…”

“None of this is your fault and you’re stronger than you think.”

She gave a sad shake of her head. “I shouldn’t be here. I should just go home. I’m just gonna bring everybody down. Tell Lu- Tell Luke I’m sorry. I can’t do this. I can’t be here.” The words fell from her mouth and she stumbled backwards away from Ashton, tears streaming down her face.

“Whoa, easy there,” Ashton said, keeping his voice calm and low. “We want you here.”

“You guys really want me here?” she asked skeptically.

Ashton nodded. “We really do. I do. C’mon, give this a chance. Please stay. Please?”

How could she say no to that dimple and those soft eyes?

~~~

“Let’s play a game of spot the goth,” Calum laughed at the camera before Ryan was moving the shoot upwards to Ashton and Leia, hiding in the shade.

The duo waved and shared a laugh. “You sure you don’t wanna go for a swim?” Ashton asked her. “Awfully hot out.” He was still in a pair black jeans with rips in the knees, but his shirt had been discarded long ago, while she stayed clad in her shirt and shorts.

She shook her head. Her sides still ached terribly when she laughed, but she could finally withstand a hug without having to excuse herself to cry out in pain after. The bruises, while no longer a horrendous shade of blues and purples, were a sickly faded yellow. No. She would much rather hide out with Ashton.

Ashton sighed. While she hadn’t actually confessed the truth of what Wyatt had done to her, Ashton was highly certain his speculations about what had happened were closer to the truth than what she had been telling Luke. “He hit you didn’t he? That’s why you’re hiding up here with me, isn’t it? To hide the bruises?” His voice held only concern, not even the slightest trace of judgement, which somehow made it worse. She didn’t deserve sympathy.

“He broke three of my ribs,” she confided anyway.

Ashton’s jaw tightened and he swore under his breath. “When?”

“The day I called Luke. So about two weeks ago.”

“Any other times?”

“No,” she shook her head. “That was the only time. I swear.”

As much as he wanted to, he wasn’t stupid enough to ask why. It didn’t matter. Wyatt shouldn’t have laid a hand on her, period. “Is that why you left your apartment?” he asked instead.

She nodded. “I’m scared of him, Ash. I don’t know what’s going to happen when this is over, and I have to come home. I can’t live with Mum and Dad forever. If I let him scare me from living my life then he wins. He already took so much from me. I can’t let him take what little I have left.”

“Come to LA with us,” he suggested.

She started to laugh but winced. “Ow! Don’t make me laugh!”

“I’m serious.”

“What would I do in LA? Live with you? Keep helping run merch for your band?”

“Well, you could get your own place if that would make you more comfortable.”

“Ow!” she chuckled, clinging to her sides. “It hurts to laugh! Stop!”

“I’m serious!” he repeated, not being able to help his own giggle. Even her pained chuckle was infectious.

She leaned her head into his shoulder, sighing in the daydream coursing through her head. Would living with Ashton really be all that horrible? She was as close to him as she was to her own twin; closer even now that they had this secret between them. It could be just like this, him making her laugh her worries away. “Mum will never forgive you for taking both of her babies to LA, you know that don’t you?”

“Hey, Luke took me to LA.”

She shook her head against him with a soft chuckle. “I’ll think about it, okay?”

“And I’ll help you pack when you realize I’m serious.”

~~~

She woke up in a cold sweat, eyes wild, hair even wilder. Her hand felt her heart racing underneath her fingertips as she kicked off the covers. The bruises had faded, her ribs had healed, but Wyatt still haunted her dreams nearly three months later. She rolled on her side to check the time on her phone: 2:17 am.

They hadn’t played a show as they were traveling to a new venue so everyone was catching up on much needed sleep.

She tried to tame her curls by pulling them into a messy ponytail before she shoved her curtain aside and crawled out of her bunk.

“Oh, hey,” a smooth but raspy voice called out to her as she pulled the fridge open to grab a water. “Couldn’t sleep either?”

She whirled around, spotting Ashton on the couch, plucking softly at a guitar. “Something like that…” she muttered, kicking the fridge closed and moving to sit beside him.

“Nightmare?” he asked, setting the guitar aside to wrap an arm around her shoulders.

“How’d you know?”

“I can hear you at night. Everyone here can sleep like the dead. Everyone but me. Always been a light sleeper.”

“Did I wake you up?” she asked, worried.

He shook his head. “Nah. I haven’t gone to sleep yet.”

“What were you playing?”

“Nothing really. Just messing around. Any requests?”

She brought a finger to her lips in thought. “Hmm… Safety Pin?”

He chuckled lightly as he reached for the guitar again and they both shifted around on the couch. He strummed quietly and sang even quieter through the song, her voice humming softly along. “You should try and get some sleep,” he told her as he set the guitar aside again. “Luke may think he’s hiding it, but he’s worried about you. We all are.”

She leaned her head back, staring up at the ceiling. “That’s not what I wanted. I never wanted anyone to worry about me.”

“Sweetheart, we’re always gonna worry about you. We love you.” And that was as close to revealing himself to her as he was going to get for now, but he placed his lips briefly to her forehead anyway.

“Ash,” she breathed, peering up at him. The tenderness was too much to bear. The ache for someone to show her that type of soft affection left her desperate and needy. “Please don’t do that…”

“Do what? Care for you?”

“Kiss me.”

“It was just a forehead kiss,” he defended, feeling guilty he had crossed the line.

“I know. And it’s going to make me want more.”

“And what if I want to give you more?” he pressed, her words assuring him of long buried feelings.

“Ash… I’m heartbroken over a boy who doesn’t deserve my tears. You’re my brother’s bandmate. We shouldn’t do this,” she said, drawing the line in the sand.

“Alright,” he relented. “But for the record, I’ve…” he paused to find the right words. “Have you ever looked at someone and just known deep down that there’s something there?”

She nodded.

“I feel that when I look at you. And I’m still going to feel that when I look at you tomorrow; the same way I’ve felt it every time I’ve looked at you.”

“Ash,” she started, but he cut her off by pressing a finger to her lips.

“Shh, it’s fine. I won’t cross that line. But I couldn’t keep that inside anymore, either. G’night, sweetheart.” He pushed himself up off the couch, heading for his bunk, but her hand reached out to wrap around his forearm. “Need something?” he asked.

“You,” was the mouthed reply and his lips were crushing down on hers, pulling out the ache she had been drowning under.

~~~

The set of light blue eyes bounced back and forth between the laughing duo as Leia tried her best to mimic Ashton’s yoga poses. “This is impossible!” Leia’s laugh rang out as she struggled to keep her balance.

“What are you talking about?” Ashton laughed with her, his hand shooting out to help keep her steady. “You’re doing great. I gotcha.”

“Whatcha guys up to?” Luke spoke up, eyebrows raised as he leaned against the wall.

Leia let out a yelp of surprise and wobbled, taking Ashton with her as they crashed to the ground, erupting in more giggles. “Lu-lu, you scared me!” Leia scolded her brother lightly as Ashton helped her to her feet.

“Mmm,” Luke nodded, pursing his lips in thought. “So, you gonna tell me? Or are you going to keep lying to me like you lied about Wyatt?”

“What are you talking about?” Leia asked, narrowing her eyes. She and Ashton had taken every precaution to keep their growing relationship as hidden as possible. The plan was to tell everyone when the tour was over, along with announcing that she’d be moving into his place in LA. Wyatt, however, was the secret she had wanted to take to her grave.

“Mum and Dad got the hospital bill, dumbass. They called me wondering if I knew anything about three broken ribs because you tell me everything. Imagine my shock when I was just as in the dark as they were.”

“Luke I-” she started.

“Why’d you lie?” he cut her off.

“I was embarrassed!” she screamed, throwing up her hands. “It’s embarrassing, Luke! I got beat up by a guy who swore he loved me! Who had us all fooled that he was a good guy! Do you know how embarrassing it is to have been that bad of a judge of character?!”

“You’re not a bad judge of character, Leia. Like you said, he had us all fooled. And you’re with Ash, aren’t you? Yeah, definitely not a bad judge of character. Not by a long shot.”

“Wait… you’re not mad?”

“No! Well… yes. But only because you lied.”

“We were gonna tell you, mate,” Ashton jumped in. “We were going to tell everyone after the tour wrapped up.”

“I’m not talking to you!” Luke snapped.

“Luke, you just said you weren’t mad about this,” Ashton said, his jaw setting.

“You lied to me! I’m your friend, Ashton! Damn near your brother!” His fiery gaze flickered over to Leia, “And I’m your actual brother!” His words held no malice, only a deep hurt that two people he cared deeply for thought that they had to keep their relationship a secret from him.

“Lu-lu, we were going to tell you. We just…”

“How long?”

“Six months,” Ashton answered. “And if we’re clearing the air, then you should know that when we get home next month, she’s moving into my place.”

Luke nodded. “Okay then. Break her heart, and it’ll be you who ends up with your ribs broken.”

“Lucas Robert!” Leia scolded, punching her brother’s arm.

“Too soon?” Luke laughed.

“Way too soon,” Leia laughed with him. “So, you’re really not mad?”

Luke shook his head. “I only ever wanted you to be happy, Le-le. You’re my twin. I’m always on your side.” He wrapped her in a tight hug.

“We’re sorry, mate,” Ashton apologized, placing his hand on Luke’s shoulder and a kiss on Leia’s hairline.

Luke fake gagged, stepping away. “I’m not that happy for you! That’s still my baby sister you’re kissing.”

“Well, I love her, so you better get used to it.”

“You fuckin’ better,” the siblings responded in unison.

“So fuckin’ much.”

__

Tag List

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[thisisthestoryofanotherus]

Tranquility- CH

A/n: I love Duke....and Calum....anywho...Hey guys! So this was a piece I was working on for #disabledsos I think I’m late but still wanted to do something. Click here for the original link. Honestly this is one of the reasons I love 5sosfam so much, this group is helping raise awareness to fans with disabilities, chronic conditions, medical illnesses etc.. They help make everyone feel included, and with this project we’re trying to spread representation. We all want to be Y/n…but sometimes its hard to picture ourselves as the reader when they are nothing like us. I decided to start with the reader being blind and read about people’s actual experiences and guide dogs, etc. trying to get perspective. This really got me thinking, and I really want to expand my writing to reach more readers of different backgrounds, so let me know what you think and any requests!

In addition to this, I may continue the story I’m not sure yet, but also having a whole event today. Send in requests for blurbs, mtls, reactions, opinions, thoughts on CALM, whatever! I’ll be here all day today getting to know you guys so please go on over to my ask box here!

Warnings: none? Dogs? Idk lol

Word Count: 1,143 ... not bad kinda short sorry

Sitting at your favorite park bench, coffee in hand, you knew it was autumn. You felt the cool breeze against your face, heard the rustle of leaves under the boots of people walking past, saw the scatter of red and yellow light against the trees in front of you. You knew this park so well you could almost see the scene in front of you. Almost… This was a favorite park of yours when you were younger, before you lost your sight that is. From what your sister told you, not much has changed. So, although you could almost see the park in your head, the reality was you really only saw bits of light and colors. Almost like someone painted what was in front of you, then started moving the brush dripping in black paint randomly across the canvas, completely mixing the colors and obscuring the image. At first adjustment was hard, but you made a life for yourself all on your own. All you had to do was approach things just a little differently.

You took another sip of your coffee as you patted the top of your trusty guide dogs head who lied on the ground beside you, enjoying your early morning. With all the stress from work and school it was nice to just sit and breathe. Your thoughts, and tranquility, were interrupted with the sound of barking, and someone screaming “DUUKKEE”. Next thing you knew there was a smaller dog jumping back and forth from your lab’s back to your knee. You dropped your coffee in surprise, praying the hot liquid hadn’t landed on either dog. From the lack of a bark or yelp, you assured yourself they were fine as you turned your attention to the pleasant surprise. As you pat the new dogs head, it left slobbery kisses all over your hand. You wish you had worn gloves, but the ball of fluff was too cute to push away.

“DUKE! Leave the poor girl alone, come here! I am so sorry… I took of his leash to fix his collar and then whhooom he was gone. He’s not bothering you is he?” A man’s voice asked, you heard him approach and pick up the poor dog, Duke you now knew. You heard your own dog Max whine a little at his new friend being taken away. You couldn’t help but laugh.

“No he’s fine! Though if you had come any later he may have licked me to death” He began to laugh too at your words, a deep chuckle that left you feeling warm despite the morning chill.  You felt him sit beside you on the bench, and from the sound of metal clinking you guessed Duke was getting his leash put back on. Although no longer a peaceful morning, you were happy for the company. This stranger seemed nice and funny…and well you had a weakness for dogs.

“Ya this is Duke. He’s a little troublemaker and getting into stuff. He’s a sweetheart, but he could learn a few things from your dog here. What’s this one’s name…” As his voice cut out and dropped a few octaves, you guessed he finally noticed the red vest on your dog. Preparing yourself for the worst, you sighed, knowing whatever moment you both had was gone. Too bad, you were enjoying the conversation.

“This is Max. Yes, its okay if you pet him right now, I don’t mind since we’re just sitting here, and before you ask I’m blind that’s what he’s helping me with.”

“O-oh, ok.” He then laughed, you couldn’t tell from amusement or nervousness. “You must get a lot of questions. Hey Max…how you doing buddy?”

You felt Max’s tail hit your leg…repeatedly. “He likes you”

“Well thank goodness. I love dogs.”

“I would hope so if you own one” you laughed, trying to ease the tension, grateful when he began to laugh as well.

“Very true! He’s my baby, but I promise you I’m not the bad parent you probably think I am. I’m Calum by the way”

“Y/n” You said extending your hand. You felt his warm, calloused hands wrap around your own as he shook your hand, lingering just a second longer. He only let go when he heard the barking of his dog, who had begun pawing at your leg trying to get down from the bench. Max started making noises too, curious as to who these new strangers were and wanting to play. He set Duke down with a “be good” and returned his attention to you.

“Y/n…” He said, as if testing the sound of your name. “Um, I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable or anything I just-“

“Hey it’s fine. You really didn’t do anything, like you said I’m used to a lot of questions and people treating me weird when they realize these stylish shades actually have purpose”

“I have to say you pull them off nicely. And I’m sorry that must be hard…”

“Eh you get used to it. Just thank you so much for not yelling”

“Why would I yell?”

“If I had a dime for every time someone started practically shouting at me when they found out I lost sight I’d be hella rich. Like they assume I’m deaf too. It would be hilarious if it wasn’t so annoying.”

“Haha…oh my gosh that’s terrible”

“Yeah…but not as bad as others asking if I need to feel their face to identify them. As if my sight moved from my eyes to my fingertips…I think that’s the worst one” You laughed

“And here I was gonna ask you to put your hands on my face so you know how good-looking I am”

Jokingly, you put your arm out aiming for his shoulder, trying to ignore the feel of his biceps, as you managed to find the side of his face. “Ah let me guess…tall, dark, and handsome?”

“Correct! I’m 6’1”, black hair, tan skin, and incredibly handsome. Wow and here you had me thinking this wouldn’t work!”

You both laughed, it was a long time since you had laughed this much. A long time since you felt this comfortable with someone. A long time that someone didn’t start treating you weird, and could actually laugh about your hardships. You wish you could have stayed here, but of course reality set in. Your alarm went off, alerting you of your next appointment.

“Great…I’m sorry I have to go. I’ve got this meeting to get to. It was nice talking to you Calum”

“Yeah…you too Y/n. It’s a small park, maybe I’ll see you around?”

“I try to walk Max here in the mornings around this time…so maybe”

You smiled and waved goodbye to the stranger Calum as you made your way out of the park, wondering when the next time you’d see him would be…

[snoopyracing]

There For You

PART TWO

Pairing: Luke Hemmings x Reader 

Warnings: Swearing

Word Count: 2,340 

Summary: angst, angst, angst 

A/N: maybe a part 2?? idk lmk

     Four years. Four years of laughter. Four years of tears. Four years of love. You had known Luke Hemmings for four years, meeting through a mutual friend. In those four years Luke and you had become inseparable. You guys were the annoying best friends who did everything together. Through thick and thin you guys were there for each other. Until one day.

The Laughter

     Nothing beat the feeling you had when it was just you and Luke, cruising around in the car. Singing along to everything and anything that came on the radio. The beginning chords of My Humps came through the speakers. Luke’s hand immediately going to the volume dial and turning it all the way to the right. You thought the speakers were going to blow from how loud Luke had the volume, but the look on his face said he couldn’t honestly care less. He was acting like a complete fool, the biggest smile on his face while he was belting out the lyrics. You couldn’t help but giggle at him, but as soon as he heard the laughter that escaped your lips his head whipped around to face you. He then realized he was driving and put his eyes back on the road. “Were you laughing at me?” He asked, slightly eyeing you. He was trying to be serious, but you both knew in a matter of seconds, you’d both be in a fit of giggles. “No, I was laughing with you!” Your giggles only getting more prominent. In reality, this situation was not really that funny, but to you two, it was more than funny. That’s one of the reasons you and Luke got along so well. Your sense of humor was the same, sure it wasn’t the best sense of humor, but to you two, you guys could be comedians. The song was long over and Luke’s singing had stopped, but you two were laughing so hard your stomach’s were starting to hurt. Once the two of you had settled down you heard Luke giggle slightly before speaking. “You know we were basically laughing at nothing.” 

The Tears

     It was a usual Thursday night, you had just gotten home from work and all you wanted to do was sit your ass on the couch and watch re-runs of The Office. You were about halfway through the first episode when your phone dinged. Picking it up from the unoccupied couch cushion next to you, you saw Luke’s name displayed on the screen. Your eyes scanned the text, reading those three little words. I need you. You typed out a response as you got up off the couch, slipping on some shoes and grabbing your keys, heading out the door. It was dark by the time you got to Luke’s, the house was asleep, not one single window had a yellow glow to it. Walking up to the front door you tried to prepare yourself for what state Luke could be in. You had your key ready, but the door was unlocked. You made a mental note to scold Luke for leaving his door unlocked, later though. The house was pitch black, you reached for the light switch near the door. You heard the tapping of nails on the hardwood floors. Petunia was at your feet in a matter of seconds wanting attention. You knelt down, giving her some pets before making your way upstairs to find Luke. As you got closer to Luke’s room you could hear faint sniffles and your heart broke more and more as you got closer. Pushing open the door you called out Luke’s name faintly, he was laying on his bed, staring up at the ceiling. The TV the only source of light in the room. You made your way to the bed, taking a seat next to him. Before you could even say anything he was grabbing a hold of you, burying his face in your neck, sobbing. You hated seeing your best friend like this. You ran your hand through his hair, trying to comfort him. 

     “Lu, you gotta tell me what’s wrong.” You said, pulling back slightly to look at him. His bright blue eyes were no longer bright and they were bloodshot beyond belief. He looked like a mess, granted, right now he was a mess. After a few more minutes of him crying and you rubbing his back, he finally muttered out some words, ones you weren’t entirely to surprised to hear. “It’s over, for good.” You knew Luke’s relationship had been messy. This wasn’t the first time you had been over at Luke’s, comforting him after they had a big blow up. You wanted to make her out to be the bad person, but Luke had the tendency to leave out details when explaining what had happened, more so he wouldn’t look like a complete ass. So you took everything with a grain of salt. Luke was no angel and you knew that, but he was your best friend. So you were going to do what best friends do, be there for one another. “Who ended it?” There was no response, only him gripping onto you tighter. “Okay, we don’t have to talk about it right now.” Somehow you were able to maneuver yourself on the bed so that you were leaning against the headboard, Luke cuddling into your side. Your hand finding its way back to his hair, running your fingers through it. “Thank you. I love you.” 

The Love

     There had always been that little voice inside your head that questioned your true feelings towards Luke. He was attractive, talented, and you guys clicked so well, so why wouldn’t you have feelings for him? There were times where you did wonder what would happen if you guys weren’t best friends, if you guys were lovers. You always pushed those thoughts aside, not really thinking too much into it. Nothing finding someone else to replace those thoughts with wouldn’t fix. You had been on quite the dry spell when it came to relationships. Sure, you had the occasional hook up, but you hadn’t been in a serious relationship in years. Tonight though that was all going to hopefully change. You had a date with some cute guy you met at the cafe down the street from your apartment. He seemed nice enough and he was quite the charmer, so you agreed to go on a date with him. The closet doors were wide open and you were standing there, trying to figure out what to wear. Cardi B was playing through your phone, you were hoping she could hype you up before the date. You got ready and met the guy at guy at a cute little Italian place down the street. 

     So far the date was going great, he was a gentleman and he could make you laugh. What more could you ask for? Then he started to fidget, your eyes traveled down to his hands. He was playing with the rings on his fingers. Your mind instantly went to the person who always played with the rings on their fingers. Luke. Now all you could think about was Luke. How you two would be joking about the names of some of the dishes on the menu. How you two would honestly never go here. How he would look at you with those pretty blue eyes from across the table and you would be putty in his hand. How the guy sitting across from you wasn’t Luke and how badly you wanted it to be him. You don’t know why it took you so long, but there in that boujee Italian restaurant, while you were on a date with someone else. You realized you loved Luke. Not like a best friend love, a romantic love. You wanted to be his source of happiness, his world, his love. 

     Now a couple months later, that realization was the source of your sadness. Luke had gone off and found someone else, someone prettier, someone who wasn’t you. The only person who knew about your feelings was Calum. Calum had also convinced you to come to their show tonight. You hadn’t seen Luke in around a month and the thought of seeing him tonight made you feel sick. But you wanted to show support for your friends, so you sucked it up. So now here you were sitting backstage with the boys, minus Luke, and you realized how much you missed hanging out with them. You had some of your greatest memories with them. The night was going pretty well and you were honestly glad you came. The boys' performance was amazing as usual and as they made their way backstage you were approached by Luke for the first time that night. He had a post performance glow and he honestly looked amazing. “Hey stranger, I haven’t seen you in awhile.” He still had that stupid charm to him. “Yeah, been busy with work.” You lied. “I’ve missed you.” He said, his arm reaching out to touch you, but you took a step back. He gave you a questioning look. but moved on. Now you just wanted to leave. You gave the rest of the boys a job well done and some hugs before making your way to the exit. You had almost made it out the door when someone grabbed your arm, pulling you into the dressing room. You knew those curly locks anywhere and right now you wanted out of this room.

     “Luke, what do you want? I need to get back home!” I was becoming annoyed. “I haven’t seen you in months and you are acting super strange. What’s up with you?” He took a seat on one of the couches and began to play with his rings. Those stupid fucking rings. You wanted to reach over and rip them off his hands and throw them away. You still stood by the door, ready to bolt. “Y/N.” His eyes bored into mine, you couldn’t resist him. Sighing you took a seat in the chair across from him, he always knew how to get his way. “Nothing is wrong Luke, I’ve just been super busy with work and some other stuff.” He pursed his lips, I knew he wasn’t buying it. “Bullshit. I think you're forgetting that I’m your best friend. I know when you’re lying and I know work hasn’t been busy at all. Don’t think I see your stories about how dead work is? I’ve texted you about hanging out and no response. So now really tell me what it is.” In that moment you wish you had some rings to fiddle with. “I can’t.” He leaned forward, his arms resting on his thighs. “What do you mean you can’t? I’m your best friend, we tell each other everything.” You could feel the tears starting to form, the lump in your throat already there. “I just can’t Lu.” Your heart ached as the nickname slipped past your lips, guess old habits do die hard. “Fine, I’ll wait until you’re ready to tell me.” 

     The two of you sat there in silence for what seemed like forever, but in reality it was around fifteen minutes. Luke was stubborn and so were you. A hard knock on the door made both of your heads whip towards the door. Curly brown locks peaked into the room. “Hey, Luke we’re leaving soon.” When Calum spotted you his eyes widened, but he said nothing, just closed the door. “Your final chance to tell me Y/N.” You never wanted any of this to happen. Why couldn’t things go back to normal, why did you have to ruin everything? Why did you have to be so utterly in love with him? He had gotten up off the couch at this point and started to make his way towards the door. Fuck it. You had nothing to lose at this point. “I love you.” Your eyes immediately closing, not want to see his reaction. “Y/N, I love you too.” You opened your eyes, he was now standing in front of you. “No. Luke I love you. Like love love.” The tears had finally escaped your eyes and were running down your face. He just stared at you. You shouldn’t have even said anything. Grabbing your purse you made a beeline for the door, but Luke stood in your way. “Luke let me leave!” He pushed you back, to sit back in the chair. “Why are you telling me this now?” He was angry. “I don’t fucking know Luke! You were the one that dragged me in here and interrogated me. I was sick of having it all bottled up inside me.” His hands were running through his hair. 

     “How long?” Your face was beat red and you knew there was mascara running down your face. “A couple months. Ever since I went on that date with that guy. I realized I wanted you.” I stood back up from the chair. “Well, I have a girlfriend now.” I chuckled at his statement, like I didn’t know that. “No shit Lucas. If you were single I would have come over that night and told you, but no. That same night you were out with her. It literally crushes me seeing you with her. That should fucking be me Luke! It should be me. You should have been the guy with me at the stupid Italian restaurant. Not some guy that was like you! We’ve been there for each other for everything! It’s supposed to be you and me, not you and her, Lu.” Your throat hurt from yelling and your tears blurred your vision. You didn’t even look at him as you grabbed your stuff and walked out the door. Opening the door you saw the rest of the boys standing there. They undoubtedly heard the entire fight. Calum tried to comfort you, but all you wanted was to be alone. As you were walking towards your car you heard Luke yell your name, but you ignored it, getting into your car and driving off. 

[lavieendonna]

Brushwork || ArtMajor!Calum AU (Chapter 20)

Summary: An Art Major AU where Dallas - third year gawky art student at VCA -  makes a deal with Calum - her cute new neighbour and project partner - and they spend the entire year learning that the perfect masterpiece takes a whole lot of brushwork.

Date: 22 February 2018 Requested: i think so? idk. probably not.    Pairing: Calum + Dallas Words: 3.5K Warnings: DATE NIGHT.......... PART 1   A/N: look okay. this is about ooh idk 2 months late. and all i have to say is i apologise. i hope you like it. or at least, don’t hate it. Big love xo 

Ask | Masterlist | ‘Brushwork’ Spotify Playlist | Next Chapter | ‘Brushwork’ News

Chapter 20: Dallas James. 21. Cause of Death: Literal Ray of Sunshine Piercing Her in Her Fucking Heart.

I don’t think I’d seen my hair look like this ever in my life. Like, Polly had done my hair plenty of times in the years we’d been friends. But it was like she was secretly on my side and really wanted me to blow Calum’s mind when he saw me tonight, but also didn’t want to say that in words so she just translated it into the language of hair.

I couldn’t stop touching it. She’d really worked some kind of dark magic to make this shit possible. It looked like silver-screen movie-star type hair – big, round, soft waves that even kind of shimmered in the shitty lighting of my studio bathroom. If I put on a tiara I could even look like some kind of gawky princess. One that wouldn’t fall over in heels to my imminent death.

I thanked Polly a million times before she claimed she needed to hit the gym and left (even though her gym nights were usually Monday’s and it was currently Friday night), and even though her smile didn’t quite reach her eyes, I let myself imagine that she was happy to help. Because despite how radiant I looked, I still felt rather sick and pretending things between Polly and I were better than they were kind of helped with that.

What also helped was sitting up all night stressing about what I was going to wear. I mean, I was also stressing about Polly being mad and my sister not answering the phone, but I managed to get some productivity out of the whole thing around 3 am and I was even still pretty in love with the outfit all these hours later. I looked at the high-waisted ripped jeans and pastel pink off-shoulder shirt lying across my (unmade) bed and decided it was The One. If I wasn’t going to end up with Calum, then at least I had this outfit to fall back on.

By the time I’d pulled the clothes on and rushed through my make-up I had 5 minutes to meet Calum downstairs. I still felt like I was going to throw up but I was wearing converse and knowing I wasn’t going to struggle in heels made me confident I wouldn’t fall over in the process. It took many, many deep breaths for me to gather my things and make it out of the apartment door, but I got there and there was no going back.

As I descended down the stairs, my heart racing in my throat, I spotted Calum leaning against the wall right across from the base of the stairs. He was in black jeans (that, by some miracle, didn’t have any rips in them) and Vans, as usual, but instead of a plaid shirt he was donning a sunflower yellow dress shirt unbuttoned over a black v-neck t-shirt. And if he didn’t look handsome enough, his hair was tousled to perfection just the way I liked it, the tattoos painted up his arms on full display and a thick silver ring circling his right index finger.

He looked like some kind of Adonis and I really wanted to throw up.

“Dallas!” His face lit up so much and I thought that might have been how this ended. I was going to die in the lobby of my student apartment building and my autopsy was going to read, Dallas James. 21. Cause of death: literal ray of sunshine pierced through her fucking heart.

“Dallas!” His smile dropped in a second flat as I stumbled on the last steps, naturally falling flat on my face. It surprised me how much it didn’t hurt, hitting my nose on the hardwood floors. But I think I was more worried about where this moment would fall on the dreaded List. Because falling down the stairs in a lecture hall was pretty bad, but falling down the stairs in front of Calum was probably worse.

“Are you okay?!” Calum scrambled to help me up, hands reaching under my arms to hoist me back up to my feet before they cupped my face and checked for bumps and bruises.

“Uhh… I think so?” I found myself mumbling. For the first time in a while I couldn’t bring myself to look Calum in the eye for longer than a couple of seconds. I cleared my throat and pulled away, trying to smile – but we all know that doesn’t work well on a squeamish stomach. “Why? Am I bleeding?” I watched Calum shrug, trying not to get lost in the way his hand immediately found mine, the concern in his face unfaltering as his fingers intertwined with mine.

“No, no. You just look kind of pale.” He said. His eyes softened up a little now, brows unfurrowing slightly, one giving a gentle arch. “Are you feeling alright?”

My eyes went wide, mouth pursed together as I stood there shaking much like a deer caught in the headlights of an 18-Wheeler ready to squish me into the pavement. But I just offered a tight-lip smile and nodded as enthusiastically as I could.

“Yeah!” I squeaked out, my voice jumping up to an octave I barely realised existed. “Yeah, I uh. Yep, I’m fine. Totally.” Calum narrowed his eyes at me.

“Are you sure?” I pressed and I let out a long breath, caught in a lie (like that was so surprising).

“I…” I closed my eyes for a moment and when I opened them, Calum was still there and waiting. The smile I offered was small and scared, and I was kind of feeling the way I did back when we first met.

“Dallas?”

I nodded slower this time, swallowing the nervous sitting on my tongue that seemed to be weighing down my words.

“I’m okay.” I said without stammering. “I just, um. I feel slightly sick?” I watched Calum’s plump lips twitch in the corners. It was like he was trying not to laugh, or trying to decide if I meant it. Which I did, one hundred per cent, but not in the way it sounded.

“Not about tonight, I hope.” Calum just said carefully and I offered a bigger smile and ever-so-slightly sidelong look.

“No.” I said very matter-of-factly. “I… It’s a good sick.” Calum cracked another smile, the same one he had when I’d come downstairs.

“There’s a good way to feel sick?” He joked and I shot him a playful glare.

“Do you want me to go back upstairs?” I threatened. “‘Cause I can go back upstairs and put my pyjamas back on…?” I made a move and stepped backward toward the stairs, only to have Calum pull me right back.

“No!” Calum laughed, pulling me close so he could engulf me in his arms. “No, okay, I’m sorry.” He was looking down on me with such fondness that my heart really kind of felt like it was going to explode; and if that weren’t enough he took it that step further, his nose brushing against the length of my own before he pressed warm lips to mine. The kiss was soft and slow and I could feel where he’d licked his lips before he leant in, and it was almost enough to make me forget all of my nerves. Almost. I was pretty sure he could still feel me shaking.

“Relax.” He told me after he pulled away and grinned lazily at me. “It’s gonna be fun.”

“You say that, but there’s still time for multiple near-death experiences.” I said with a straight face (though the corners of my mouth twitched in betrayal). “Does that sound fun to you?”

“With you? Always.” Calum didn’t miss a beat in response, and all I could do was laugh and shove him lightly, all while blushing furiously and trying to remember my senses. “And besides, you’ve just had one. I want to start a tally.” I promptly hit him in the bicep for that one, but laughed along anyway.

We made small talk in the Uber, and the trip to Docklands only took about 15 minutes. By the time we got there the sun was setting over water in the docks and city seemed to be engulfed in a cold, but beautiful, red and golden hug. Though the air was cold, the breeze was light – just enough to tussle the curls of my hair and re-ruffle the curls of Calum’s. But I shivered lightly as Calum touched the small of my back, gesturing me towards the row of restaurants alongside the docks.

We didn’t say much for a while, we just walked and shivered and wandered why it took 6 months for this to happen. At least, that’s what I did. Although the more I thought about it the more I realised that I wasn’t shivering because of the cold and instead it had more to do with Calum and how he seemed to be attached to my hand (in the best way possible). Every now and then he squeezed my hand reassuringly, and I looked back up to him and, as always, he was already looking at me with soft brown eyes and a crooked smile. I just shivered again and hid behind my hair, waiting for a wave to get too high and wash me away into the sea. Maybe then I’d become a mermaid and this whole dating thing wouldn’t be so hard.

Eventually, Calum led me into a restaurant (and I tried not to fall the ground and kiss the floor when the smell and promise of food made me realise how hungry I was), and once we’d been seated and had successfully ordered something to drink and some starters, things started to feel a little bit more normal. Not completely, because I was still a shaking mess on a date with Calum Hood. But he started talking and something seemed to click that maybe, just maybe, the whole night didn’t need to go this way.

“I can’t remember the last time I had a decent meal.” Calum seemed to chuckle as we demolished a plate of garlic bread.

“Oh, dude, same.” I breathed out a laugh of relief that I wasn’t the only one really looking forward to the food. “I’m pretty sure the last time I had something freshly made…” I paused to think about it, and my cheeks flushed a little when I realised that I’d gone out for lunch with Isabelle not even a week ago. I remembered because I could distinctly recall wanting to drown myself in soup when she was making a big deal out of Calum and me having a date. “Ah. Wednesday.” I confessed and Calum spluttered out a laugh.

“Yeah, ‘cause that was so long ago, Dallas.” His eyes crinkled in the corner and I couldn’t help but laugh too.

“When you live off of Maggi noodles and dollar loaves of bread from Coles, yeah, Wednesday was pretty freaking long ago, Calum.” I defended myself. Calum laughed but nodded, palms up in surrender.

“Alright, alright!” He agreed. “Fair point. Did you want another drink?” He asked and it wasn’t until then that I realised that I had finished my wine.

“Oh, um.” I stared at the empty glass for a moment, trying to decide if that was a good idea. “I, uh. Yeah,” I decided before I started reaching for my wallet. “But I can get it, don’t –hey!”

Calum grabbed my wallet straight out of my hands before I had a chance to even finish my sentence.

“You’re not paying for a thing.” He said, and I shrank in my seat feeling very scolded. His eyes were pointed and almost dark, and if I didn’t like him so much I would have been terrified for my life. But then his lips twitched and his eyes crinkled again and my heart kind of just fluttered away from me. “I’ll be right back.” I almost didn’t realise that he’d taken my wallet hostage, either.

I wished to God, while I waited for Calum to return from the bar, that I could pin-point the moment things started working out. Because as far as I knew I was still dorky as hell and unlikeable to mankind. But for some reason, Calum liked me. Like, he like-liked me. And although that was such a surreal thing to believe, it was true – this far. And I felt like if I could pin-point that moment when things started working in my favour, then maybe I could keep it up for as long as I possibly could.

When he came back he set a new wine glass in front of me, filled with the same sweet berry goodness that had filled it before, a new tall pint of whatever sitting in front of him too.

“You really didn’t have to you, know.” I said very matter-of-factly, and it surprised me a little bit, how cool and casual I was being. Calum just shrugged as he sat back down in his seat across from me.

“Yeah I did.” He said simply. “It’s a date; my treat.” I rolled my eyes, though internally I was gushing at his chivalry.

“It’s a mutual date,” I reminded him. “I agreed to this, remember? I should be allowed to pay for some things.” He shook his head, a flirtatious, cheeky smile spreading across his lips.

“Not this time.” He said just as simply as before. I raised my brows at him.

“Next time?” I offered. He paused, thought, and then shook his head with a playful expression glistening in brown eyes.

“Nah, probably not.” He said and I really wanted to slap him again for that.

“You know, sometimes chivalry should stay dead.”

I laughed at him and Calum laughed back the way only he could. It was the magical kind of laugh; the kind of laugh that made me forget that there could have been real problems in the world. The kind of laugh that made everything kind of okay for a while. Polly didn’t matter and Ashton didn’t matter – hell my own family didn’t even matter because Calum was laughing at something I said and I didn’t immediately want to neck myself for it. Everything was okay – there was a chance of Happily Ever After here, I could feel it.

“Can I ask you something?” Calum asked me a few minutes after our main courses had arrived. My pasta was smelling like the greatest thing on the planet and I really wanted to scoff it down – but I couldn’t, because Calum was asking me a serious-sounding question.

“Uh, yeah.” Mumbled out, a little hesitant but the sound was involuntary. “’Course, go for it.” Calum took a bite of his steak quickly and chewed while deep in thought. It was a little unnerving, but for some God-known reason I trusted him.

“Do you know why I want to paint you as our ballerina?” He asked me. And I was a little taken back because, as always, I wasn’t really expecting that kind of question. We’d spoken about this before and how I was really against the idea of me being the face of our project. I wasn’t up to such standards, but Calum really seemed to think so. It made me uneasy thinking about how this could have been another conversation about him trying to change my mind about that. Because as far as I could tell, I never would. Unless I woke up looking like Cara Delavigne or some other equally, ridiculously attractive supermodel, my face wasn’t coming anywhere near that wall (at least, not in paint form).

“Um.” I cleared my throat a little, took a sip of wine and a bit of food before I attempted to answer that. “I, uh. I guess not, no.”

For a couple of moments, Calum wasn’t looking at me and I wondered what that could have meant. But then his eyes turned upward toward me again and he seemed… not desperate, but insisting. He chewed with intent, like he was about to mean every word he said in the next few minutes. Knowing him, that’s exactly what was about to happen. He was an honest man, especially when it came to me. I got the feeling whatever was about to come next, it wasn’t going to be a string of random ramblings.

“You don’t…” He started, and then stopped. I put down my cutlery as he did and watched his face for any hint as to what he was going to say. Calum was so hard to read. I couldn’t tell if the slight furrow in his brow was good or bad, and I couldn’t tell if it was a good thing that he didn’t look away from me, not once.

“I don’t what?” I prompted, the sound kind of squeaking out. “What don’t I do?” My mouth twitched nervously, though I was lucky that the curiosity of whatever Calum was trying to say was greater than the return of the feeling that I needed to throw up.

“You don’t seem to have a clue how… amazing you are.” Okay, of all of the things Calum could have said, of all the adjectives he could have used, amazing was not the one I was expecting. I just stared blankly at the brunet, unsure what to say.

“I, um.” I wanted to cough and splutter and clear my throat and deny it. But I couldn’t. “I don’t, uh. I don’t think I am.”

“I know.” Calum just said flatly. “That’s what I mean. You don’t think you’re good enough, you never see yourself the way that everybody else does. You’re beautiful, Dal. And you’re smart and funny and soulful and caring. And naïve.”

“Naïve?” I cocked a fearful eyebrow. I still didn’t really know if Calum was angry or not. I don’t think he was, but he still intimidated the shit out of me.

“You don’t see any of that. You don’t hold yourself to those standards. And I wish to God that you would, Dal. If we paint you as the ballerina, Dallas… I figured that there was a chance that maybe you would finally see yourself the way everyone else does. The way I do.”

I had no idea what to say. What was I supposed to say? Thank you? Not likely. It was all so much to take in, I almost couldn’t do it all at once. I felt warm and giddy at the fact that Calum saw me in this light that I’d never once thought I would ever be in, but I was almost more confused than ever. All I could think of was, ‘why me? Of everybody in this universe, why me?’

“Can I ask you a question?” I mimicked Calum’s earlier request, watching the way his brow furrowed considering I didn’t respond to his bold and loving statements. But he nodded anyway, when he smoothened his expression and offered a small smile.

“Anything you want.” He said softly. I think he was trying to make me feel better, like he could sense the anxiety wavering off of my shoulders. If he could, it probably wasn’t a new thing. I just hoped I could stomach my words enough to get them out in real words.

“Why?” I brought my inner monologue to life.

“Why, what?” He asked and I gave a shrug, trying to find the right way to ask what was going through my head.

“Why… why did you decide to like me?”

Calum scoffed and I couldn't help the small giggle that bubbled from my lips in response.

“What?!” I chuckled.

“Seriously?” He laughed. “That’s your question?!”

“Yes, that’s my question!” I said. “Seriously, why me?”

“I don’t know, Dallas!” He laughed again, shaking his head as he took a drink. I watched in total awe of the human in front of me and the way his smile was just something else entirely. “Why did you decide to phrase your question like that?” I snorted too, when he put it like that.

“Because…!” I buried my face in my hands, I could feel the heat rising in my cheeks. This was not how I envisioned this conversation going. When I peeked through my fingers he was looking back, the same admiration in his eyes that I had just moments before.

“Exactly.” He nearly whispered back. “I like you because I like you. Is that not enough?”

My smile was starting to hurt my cheeks, it was so wide. I nodded as I brought my hands away from my face. I took the first move this time and I reached for him, taking his hand in mine and caressing the back of it gently with my thumb. I almost felt like I wanted to cry, this didn’t seem real. But I smiled and I nodded and I looked into eyes and probably fell, maybe, a little bit in love.

“Yeah.” I said, almost mumbling. “I um. I like you too.”

[ourreferences02]

seventy-three questions

I guess this is like if some random person wanted to interview my kids, idk. Ignore how some things capitalized on their own, ik it’s very annoying. not to mention, I didn’t bold or italicize anything. there’s too many words in this post it would take too much time, sorry. have fun reading all of this

q: what’s your favorite movie you’ve seen in the past month?

Richard: Richard peter Johnson. it’s about me. for sure.

bella: to the bone. I forget if they have a trigger warning. I don’t know, I liked it.

calum: john wick. there’s a lot of cool stuff

leia: frozen and moana!!!

q: favorite animal?

Richard: I honestly don’t know. for shits and giggles, maybe cougars

bella: um... when I was little I really liked birds, bunnies, lions, and lambs

calum: dragons are super strong and op

leia: puppiessssssss

q: best friend’s name?

Richard: sam

bella: i’m not very close with anyone. ally, I guess

calum: kirk junior

leia: luke

q: book you plan on reading?

Richard: the catcher in the rye

bella: pride and prejudice

calum: I want to get the guiness book of world records for 2017

leia: the blue fairy book. it’s about fairy tales

q: something that positively shaped you?

Richard: sick as it sounds, my girlfriend set herself on fire and had to go to the hospital. it was because of me, and when she made it out of that experience with no burns it somehow got me to be more appreciative and inspired me to stop being such a dick sometimes

bella: theo.

calum: I heard about LeBron james

leia: life

q: biggest secret?

Richard: don’t have one, really

bella: it wouldn’t be a secret if I told someone, would it?

leia: I found out that my best friend is sleeping beauty! but a boy!

calum: not telling. i’m not retarded.

q: on a scale of one to ten, how excited are you about life right now?

Richard: ten? idk

bella: 6... hehe

calum: five is average. so five.

leia: a bagillion gazillion and one

q: iPhone or android?

Richard: androids have potato cameras

bella: iPhone. I guess if they’re too expensive an android would be okay

calum: aren’t andriods robots

leia: aye aye captain hahahhahhahhahhaha

q: twitter or Instagram?

Richard: twitter

bella: definitely Instagram

calum: I like jetpack joyride

leia: graham crackers?

q: who should everyone be following right now?

Richard: me. just kidding, um... my friends tyrone and Tanisha. they’re living on their own for the most part, with two twin babies, at fifteen. kudos

bella: not kim Kardashian.

calum: stalkers. show them how they make other people feel.... oh sorry, wrong kind of following

q: favorite food?

Richard: I can’t come up with something so i’m just going to say pizza

Bella: i like chicken alfredo pasta. I’m not sure if it’s my favorite though

Calum: hot dogs

Leia: crackers

q: least favorite food?

Richard: cornbread. I’ve seen timmy wolf down a whole loaf. It was huge. There was a lot of blowing chunks after. Scarring, tbh

Bella: never liked green beans

Calum: eggplants, carrots, and bananas

Leia: steak is hard for me to chew sometimes

q: what do you love on your pizza?

Richard: cheese

Bella: cheese. Oh, richard said that too? Ffs

calum: pepperonis

Leia: anchovies! Just kidding, i’m joking!

q: favorite drink?

Richard: i’ve got no clue. water is very underrated

Bella: i used to love lemonade. Haven’t had that in years. Oh, right. I like tea, coffee, root beer, yeah

Calum: i’ve never had vodka, but vodka

Leia: do slushies count?

q: favorite dessert?

Richard: i’m a fabulous dessert -wink- um, no, in all seriousness, chocolate ice cream

Bella: huh. I haven’t had dessert in a while either. Shit.

Calum: chocolate chip cookies

Leia: everything sweet

q: dark chocolate or milk chocolate?

Richard: well I know how tyrone would answer this. I guess milk chocolate

Bella: milk?

Calum: both

Leia: ooooooh, one second, i’ll be back! NO IT’S NOT TO GET CHOCOLATE

q: coffee or tea?

Richard: coffee

Bella: they’re both good for photos, coffee tastes better, but tea is better for you

Calum: alcohol

q: hardest decision?

Richard: what to answer for this question. That counts?!

Bella: life or death. I chose life, obviously

Calum: i’m bored

Leia: my mom asked me if i wanted a dog or a cat! I said dog, but she never got either one

q: favorite fruit?

Richard: peach. -eyebrow wiggle- I actually don’t know

Bella: pineapple, mango, peach, blueberry, blackberry, raspberry, watermelon...

Calum: pear

Leia: applllllllles!!!

q: favorite singer or songwriter?

Richard: shawn mendes. I’M JOKING

Bella: isabella vail. Sorry, no self-promo? Okay, theo herondale -grin-

Calum: eminem

Leia: idina menzel

q: favorite song?

Richard: can’t say

Bella: that’s a lot of pressure

Calum: i’m hungry

Leia: I’VE BEEN STARING AT THE EDGE OF THE WAT-

q: if you could sing a duet with anyone, who would it be?

Richard: shawn mendes. I’M STILL JOKING I SWEAR

Bella: theo.

Calum: that’s gay

Leia: MOANA

q: if you had a tattoo, where would it be?

Richard: could i get a tramp stamp

Bella: i can’t choose, whoops

Calum: my arm

Leia: but they’re permanent!!

q: to be or not to be?

Richard: to be

Bella: to be or not to be.. ahh.. Love it

Calum: not to be

Leia: tooooo beeeeeeee... Two bees?

q: bird-watching or whale-watching?

Richard: whale-watching but only if i could ride the whale

Bella: bird-watching, they make such pretty sounds

Calum: a bird shit on my head

Leia: whale-watching because then i could see mermaids too!!!

q: best gift ever received?

Richard: sofia and will, thank you so much for your second creation. Not that the other ones aren’t good i just mean i love wed oh god just shut up richard. Praise you guys, hallelujah. Rest in peace, will. Would’ve been nice to get a “NOW YOU BE CAREFUL WITH MY DAUGHTER!” chat.

Bella: meeting theo was the best thing that’s ever happened to me.. wait is anyone going to see this? Oh god please no UM OKAY best gift other than that, i got a purple flower pin from.. someone.. Although i technically didn’t get it from them..i don’t want to think about this, never mind

Calum: my mom got a basketball hoop for me

Leia: everything!!

q: best gift you’ve ever given?

Richard: i once decorated bella in glitter and shit and then tried to give her to my mom. Yeah, i still don’t know why i did that. Awww, my little sissie, i’m gonna give her a hug after this

Bella: i wouldn’t know

Calum: i gave kirk junior a whole pack of gum once

Leia: i gave luke’s grandma a pretty flower. She’s really nice.

q: last gift you gave a friend?

Richard: the cornbread timmy threw up

Bella: i’ve never had a real friend, um, i gave annabelle a horse necklace and dora a set of nail polish. But they’re just people i talk to sometimes. Plus annabelle.. ugh

Calum: i gave savannah a pencil. Hope she liked it

Leia: i gave my mom a hug today!!

q: favorite video game?

Richard: OH MINECRAFT FOR SUUUUUUUURE!!! sorry i’m not in a serious mood

Bella: i don’t really play video games, the sims, i guess

Calum: call of duty games

Leia: roblox!! I like the pizza delivery game

q: favorite meme?

Richard: oh boy

Bella: are you serious? Right in front of my salad?

Calum: the spongebob music one

Leia: what’s a meem

q: last country visited?

Richard: greece

Bella: greece

Calum: how much longer

Leia: greece

q: favorite body part on a human?

Richard: well this could get some perverted answers

Bella: eyes. But “eyeballs” sounds atrocious.

Calum: pussy

Leia: their hearts!!!!!!

q: favorite color?

Richard: i like reds, blues, greens, idk

Bella: i loved yellow when i was younger. Blues are good too. As for the stuff that’s not on the rainbow, i guess i like black, gray, silver, gold, and white. Oh red is good sometimes

Calum: red, green, orange

Leia: light blue

q: least favorite color?

Richard: that murky brown and green mixture -shudder-

Bella: the colors that we can’t see or imagine. So frustrating.

Calum: yellow

Leia: i like all of the colors, i wouldn’t want any to feel bad about themselves

q: diamonds or pearls?

Richard: i mean there are no pearls in minecraft... OKAY I’LL STOP

Bella: diamonds

Calum: you could sell the diamonds and be rich

Leia: great grandma grace had pearls

q: heels or flats?

Richard: i lost a bet to a guy in a chiffon skirt, but i make these high heels work

Bella: it depends

Calum: heels are sexy.

Leia: no girl can walk in heels, can they? OMG BELLA YOU’RE WALKING IN HEELS

q: pilates or yoga?

Richard: how about just working out

Bella: yoga

Calum: there’s yoga instructor porn

Leia: you mean pirates or yoda? Yoda is in star wars with princess leia, so yoda

q: jogging or swimming?

Richard: swimming for sure

Bella: i mean, i love swimming. But it’s hard to go near a pool when you’ve drowned yourself. I’m sorry i keep being gloomy

Calum: sorry, i fell asleep

Leia: swimming!

q: best way to de-stress?

Richard: hahahhahhahah

Bella: talking to someone, hugging someone, etc.

Calum: sleeping helps

Leia: just breathe! ahhhh...

q: if you had one superpower, what would it be?

Richard:i heard about a superpower that is all the superpowers

Bella: richard told me abo- he said that too?!

q: weirdest person you ever met?

Richard: the howler or the tricycle guy

Bella: theo. -devilish grin- nO I’M KIDDING DON’T TELL HIM I SAID THAT! Awe, i feel bad

Calum: my whole family

Leia: i don’t know, everyone’s weird in their own way

q: favorite flower?

Richard: i don’t know about many besides roses

Bella: i could list my top 50 if you want

Calum: ew

Leia: dandelions grant wishes!

q: last time you cried?

Richard: when my girlfriend was in the hospital

Bella: ...

Calum: crying is for chumps

Leia: i’m too happy to cry

q: do you like your handwriting?

Richard: no?

Bella: im not sure

Calum: oh bitch i fell asleep again

Leia: i forget to dot my i’s sometimes

q: do you bake?

Richard: i live in a house with girls, of course. OH SHOOT WAS THAT SEXIST, I’M SO SORRY I DIDN’T MEAN IT LIKE TH- oh right. Forgot about calum. LOVE YA CAL

Bella: baking and cooking are both fun

Calum: no. i eat the baked goods though

Leia: i eat the cookie dough heheh

q: least favorite thing about yourself?

Richard: my anger issues

Bella: my luck

Calum: i’m amazing

Leia: i-i love myself!!! haha..

q: favorite thing about yourself?

Richard: idk

Bella: haha

Calum: everything

Leia: i think i’m nice

q: who do you miss most?

Richard: ggg. Great grandma grace

Bella: not ben. I liked you when you were alive, but you are unbearable as a ghost

Calum: i just want to play basketball

Leia: everyone who is in heaven!!!

q: what are you listening to right now?

Richard: the wind, i guess

Bella: arctic monkeys

Calum: leia trying to sing. She sucks

Leia: my favorite tarzan song

q: favorite smell?

Richard: um

Bella: rain, books, fire, theo, dryer sheets, flowers, oh no did i say theo? -blush- please don’t put that in

Calum: no idea

Leia: freshly baked sugar cookies, bella’s are better than my mom’s!

q: last person you talked to on the phone?

Richard: sam. He’s giving me updates on gilly and her baby. I hope she’s doing okay..

Bella: i got some type of hate call from someone. Idk who.

Calum: kirk junior and i were talking about basketball

Leia: luke. He said i’m giving him mixed signals. I have no clue what that means

q: last person you sent a text to?

Richard: tyrone

Bella: charlie

Calum: i don’t have a phone.. one day

Leia: look! The lollipop made my tongue blue!!!

q: sport you wish you could play?

Richard: is archery a sport? Because that’s cool

Bella: i don’t play any sports -sigh-

Calum: i do play basketball, but i really like basketball, so basketball.

Leia: i wish i could ice skate more

q: hair color?

Richard: a medium/dark brown

Bella: i’m a brunetteeeee

Calum: light brown

Leia: blonde!

q: eye color?

Richard: green. Idk about greater detail

Bella: crystal blue? It’s like a blue but if you turned the saturation down a bit and put some shine in there

Calum: i don’t check

Leia: blue, like blue whale

q: scary films or happy endings?

Richard: both

Bella: happy endings

Calum: no real man likes happy endings

Leia: scary movies scare me

q: favorite season?

Richard: tough

Bella: it really depends. Spring is very rainy but i like the rain. Summer is super hot but school’s out and it’s beautiful out. Fall comes with the colorful tree leaves and the clothing, and winter is cold but you have hot chocolate and oversized sweaters

Calum: i bet bella gave a long answer. Loser.

Leia: summer!

q: sexual fantasy?

Richard: where did that come from

Bella: -beet red- w-what?

Calum: huh

Leia: what’s that?

q: hugs or kisses?

Richard: both

Bella: bot- HE SAID THAT TOO? WTH

Calum: neither

Leia: hug time!

q: rolling stones or the beatles?

Richard: the beatles

Bella: the beatles, for sure

Calum: how many left?

Leia: why are we talking about things in the garden

q: favorite sex position?

Richard: i swear this came out of nowhere

Bella: -blink-

Calum: missions. Missionary? Yeah, that’s what i meant

Leia: i’m so confused

q: farthest you’ve been from home?

Richard: i died twice. Dk where i ended up

Bella: see i killed myself, and then i was in some sort of darkness for a week until i decided to come back

Calum: are we close to finished

Leia: look at this nail polish! Isn’t it so pretty?!

q: left or right?

Richard: the price is right

Bella: right

Calum: left

Leia: right

q: lipstick or lip gloss?

Richard: um

Bella: lipstick

Calum: almost?

Leia: lip gloss

q: scariest dream?

Richard: you’d know if i pissed myself

Bella: ..don’t want to talk about it, sorry

Calum: im not scared of anything

Leia: cookeh im mah mout, un segont

q: favorite type of hair?

Richard: i guess i like head hair over pubic hair

Bella: depends

Calum: hairless cats

Leia: those naked rodents

q: title of your autobiography?

Richard: one second, let me think of something

Bella: i wouldn’t write an autobiography

Calum: Perfection

Leia: my life

q: favorite sound?

Richard: did i really just fall asleep

Bella: sorry, what? I was doodling.

Calum: basketballs bouncing

Leia: water

q: favorite animal?

Richard: wasn’t this already a question

Bella: On the other side of a street I knew, stood a girl that looked like you, i guess thats deja vu

Calum: there has to be only a couple left

Leia: what

q: girl crush?

Richard: there’s this girl named wednesday herondale, she’s honestly my dream girl -grin-

Bella: how’d you know i’m bi? nO NOT BIPOLAR

Calum: i-i don’t h-have one..

Leia: i love my sister!

q: last photograph you took?

Richard: you’d expect it to be a nude because i’m a teenage boy, yeah, yeah, i see you.. well, i’ll have you know, it’s a picture of... my girlfriend. isn’t she beautiful, look at her!

Bella: okay so this one is o- fine. Don’t let me go into detail.

Calum: i took this selfie on my ipad by accident. I have a double chin in it haha WAIT WE’RE DONE?! YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

Leia: oh this one’s of my finger! whoops!