#if nothing else I am having an extremely productive year

[sealsapocalypticmusic]

New song tomorrow!

[scalefeathers]

Thinking once again about how Nobuo Uematsu and Masayoshi Soken are both completely amazing composers but in completely opposite directions let me explain

Disclaimer I am not a music theorist; most of music theory is black fucking magic to me. I barely know what a chord is and the circle of fifths makes me quake as though before an Elder God. I just really like both of their works and sometimes I have thoughts about things. Also this is all just my opinion, it's fine if you don't agree, etc.

So: Uematsu is first and foremost, in my opinion, an absolute master of melody. I believe it's what makes his work so iconic and makes so many of his pieces so instantly recognizable. The Final Fantasy theme, the chocobo theme, Dancing Mad, Vamo'alla Flamenco, fucking One-Winged Angel--Just from seeing those names, you've probably got one playing in your head already. You could start humming it right now. Maybe you are already.

And it makes perfect sense when you consider the era he was working in, because back in the 8-bit and 16-bit era, the melody was all you had. When you have such a tiny amount of storage space to work with, you can really play only one, maybe two notes at a time. You can't do anything that's layered, because you only have one layer to work with. I think that's why so much video game music from that era is so memorable and iconic. It's not just because you played so much Street Fighter II when you were a kid that the music is indelibly seared into your brain (though that probably doesn't hurt); it's also because Yoko Shimomura wrote really solid melodies that had nothing else competing for your aural attention (apart from the in-game sound effects, which are probably also seared into your memory). (Yoko Shimomura, btw, also composed the music for Final Fantasy XV, the entire Kingdom Hearts series, and like 50 other games over the past 40 years, another fucking icon).

But back to Uematsu: like I said, melodic genius. Even when his work is upscaled into full orchestral arrangements, that core melody is always front and center. And his affinity for melody makes even more sense when you consider that before he got into video game composing, he was writing commercial jingles. (Younger folks may not be aware, but there was a time when practically every product had to have its own theme song, and the best ones were short, snappy, and instantly memorable--and for that, again, you need a strong, simple melody. Ba da ba ba ba, I'm lovin' it.)

Compare: Soken. Soken only started at Square 12 years after Uematsu, which isn't that long in human terms (to me at least, cos I'm old), but it is a long fuckin' time in video game years. By the time he started composing for games, there was so much more you could do with game music in terms of layering, complexity, and sound, and you can tell from his work that he takes full advantage of that. His work is complex and dense, a rich layer cake of themes and motifs, all beautifully merging and weaving together, often to extraordinary effect.

And again, if you look at his pre-music career, it makes a lot of sense that he'd have that approach to music, because he first got into the games industry as a sound designer; I believe that he is the sound director for all the FFXIV expansions, as well as being the composer. So of course he'd be very aware of not just how a sound (or piece of music) works on its own, but of how it fits into the greater whole, and of how to layer and balance lots of different sounds to create something greater than the sum of its parts. And of course it makes sense that he'd bring that approach to his compositions as well.

As a consequence of this approach, though, his music often lacks the memorable melodies that characterize Uematsu's work. Like, I ground (grinded?) Dun Scaith a lot the last time it was on the Mogstone rotation, I know all the boss themes extremely well and can recognize each of them instantly. But if you asked me right now to hum one? I don't think I could. (This isn't a deficiency, to be clear; music doesn't need a prominent core melody in order to be good.)

And that's also not to say that all his music lacks iconic melodies. His vocal tracks, pretty much by definition, have to put a single melody front and center; and then on top of that (or rather, behind it), you have all that trademark Soken richness and depth. Which is probably also why his vocal tracks go so fucking hard.

I think that's also why, out of all the expansions, I like Heavensward's music the best. Most of Heavensward's score is written by Soken, but the main theme is Uematsu's, and you may notice it's basically a tasting menu of like 5 or 6 excellent, very recognizable melodies, one right after the other. And basically every piece on the Heavensward soundtrack incorporates one or more of these melodies. So it really does give you the best of both worlds, and gives the overall score a cohesion that I don't see as much with the other expansions.

TL;DR, Uematsu and Soken are both amazing composers with very different and complimentary styles that reflect their differing backgrounds and the different eras of games in which they have worked and I just think that's neat.

[titsliker]

i would love 2 hear an elaboration of bitb as a schizophrenic metaphor :0000

before i get into it i wanna explain that this just based on my experience with a substance induced psychotic episode. im not an expert and i might mention things that are normal. i am schizophrenic so my normal is very different. keep this in mind as you read.

so call of cthulhu itself has a theme of the descent into madness, so whatever happens throughout the course of the campaign is implied to be fully real, but its very easy to interpret it as purely the result of psychosis. blood in the bayou starts with everyone doing drugs associated with being the catalyst of a psychotic episode. people with a family history of psychosis are recommended to NEVER smoke weed or take shrooms because your chances of substance induced psychosis are EXTREMELY HIGH.

on the surface the story reflects a really good example of paranoid delusions. everyone is bugs and they want to turn you into bugs. rolan is a really good example, he feels the bugs under his skin, hes the first to see something he cant explain, the tv is somehow communicating something to him, and he realizes he died years ago and that the whole life he made for himself was never his.

these are all very common experiences for people experiencing psychosis. the delusion that youve died and are now something completely different is as common as it is difficult to explain, and with the context of the rest of the plot you can see plain as day how he would think that, but you seldom see the context when it comes to real people so it makes no sense from an outside perspective.

its not as simple as rolan thinking he died, it requires the context of a web of delusions that worm their way into every aspect of your perception. every piece of information he has gathered all points to the central truth that he is dead, thats his reality whether its the product of psychosis or not.

theres a few very good examples of this descent into psychosis throughout the campaign, but my favorite is rand's spiral the night before rolan's parents funeral.

idk if this is something anyone else has dealt with, but the portrayal of rand having an all nighter where he reframes his entire perception of reality to include aspects of fiction in a spiral of panic and paranoia is personally something i can relate very very heavily to. theres hints here and there that youre losing your touch on reality until a flip switches and youre completely detached. everything seems so tangible and connected, and the audience can see everything that led him to that conclusion!

its real beyond a doubt, until he tries to explain it to everyone. you understand why hes so frantic, but nothing hes saying makes a lick of sense to anyone else. no amount of explanation can make anyone see what he can see. hes talking about something thats so distant from reality that the only conclusion is that, according to everyone else in the story, hes crazy.

theres a lot more to this that i wont get into, such as kian and the acceptance and normalization of psychosis in his upbringing, donna and the prevalence of religion in psychosis, and rolan and how previous experiences with psychosis can impact your current experience, but i dont have the time or energy for all that mess.

long story short, this is the only good representation of a substance induced psychotic episode ive ever seen and it doesnt even stigmatize drug use <3

[straykids-gives-me-life]

Too Hot To Handle

HWANG HYUNJIN PART I

word count: 5.2k

---

YOU: To be honest, I don't know why I signed up for this show. I think I just did it for a good bit of fun; sex and a vacation? I think so!

-

You were the first to arrive at the villa and it seemed so surreal that you had actually decided to come onto 'Paradise Island' because never in a million years would you have thought you would be here. You walked through the gates to enter and realised you were the first to arrive and to be honest, you weren't complaining. More champagne for you.

"Oh my god! It's so nice here," you say to yourself, picking up a bottle and pouring yourself a glass.

While you're looking around at the place where you'll be staying for the next few weeks you see someone walking over from the corner of your eye. An extremely handsome, tall, blonde man at that.

"Hi there," he says, a strong British accent accompanying his words.

"hi, I'm y/n," you say.

"Harry."

-

YOU: I'm fucked already and I've only met one guy [chuckles]

-

After the introduction to everybody else and dishing out five bottles of champagne whilst doing so, everyone is allowed to roam free and look around, get to know each other and have fun.

Of course, you being you, head over to the sun loungers where you lay back and take in the sun that beams down on your body.

"Do you mind if I sit with you?" A voice says, startling you a little.

"Oh, yeah, of course, sorry," you rush.

"Oh, no, it's alright, I was the one who scared you," he laughs.

It's only then when you actually look at the man before you, his slender build shocking you a little. He is nowhere near the size of the muscular men in the retreat but holy shit, he was hot. His dark hair fell over his eyebrows and hung slightly in front of his eyes in such a way that made you want to fall to your knees there and then. he was absolutely breathtakingly gorgeous, nothing more, nothing less.

"I'm Hyunjin, nice to meet you."

He snaps you out of your trance. "Oh, I'm y/n, nice to meet you too."

"Can I just say how beautiful you are/" He says, making your cheeks flush pink.

"Oh, thank you," you smile. "You aren't too bad yourself."

-

YOU: Hyunjin is so fucking hot! [internally screams]. I just want to lick his entire body which I know sounds strange but he's just so... so... lickable.

-

"So what do you do? Outside of here?" He asks, taking a sip of his drink.

"Well I'm actually a choreographer for this trainee girl band for YG Entertainment, they aren't too bad actually," you explain. "What about you?"

"Well, at the moment I'm doing a few things at once. I'm trying out music production for the first time but I've got a part time job at a bar just for the time being in case I realise that I'm not cut out for being a producer."

You stare at him as he talks about his work. How can somebody look so good at all times, even when he's talking normally he looks so Godly, how does he manage?

"Well," you being, realising he was done talking. "I think that if you want to give it a shot, you should. you never know if you're gonna like it or not. And hey, some people really love working in bars so you never know, you might find that producing isn't your thing but pouring shots might."

What the fuck. Why did you just say that????? You were beyond embarrassed after blurting out the words, but surprisingly, he laughed.

"You never know," he grinned. "Maybe you'll be my interest instead."

"I already am."

-

HYUNJIN: This girl is going to be the death of me. I don't understand how she can be so fucking beautiful and oh my God her tits are amazing. I could just stare at her all day and never get bored. Her voice is like music to my ears, actually, I think I'll like producing after all.

-

Unfortunately, you and Hyunjin had to cut your conversation short because you were interrupted by two more contestants on the show, Patrick and Rhia.

"Hey guys, what's going on over here?" Patrick asks, sitting beside you and placing his arm around your shoulder.

He's moving a little fast, you think, so you shrug his arm slightly, hinting for him to remove it. you don't miss the little smirk on Hyunjin's face as Patrick puts his arm down, perhaps you were going to have someone to share a bed with tonight after all.

"Nothing much," Hyunjin says. "Just getting to know each other, that's all."

"Ah, I see," Patrick says. "So you're still open to talking to other guys here, right?"

"Um, I guess," you say, looking over at the girl, Rhia, for some support.

"That is if she wants to," Rhia says, sipping her champagne.

"Of course."

You felt a little awkward now, now that it wasn't just you and Hyunjin talking, you wanted to get away from whatever was going on. So, with that, you stood up and excused yourself to the "bathroom".

-

YOU: I think Hyunjin could tell that I was getting uncomfortable, he seemed a little concerned. I don't know why I'm so hooked on this guy already, I've literally only spoken to him once and it was a five-minute conversation, if that. [rolls eyes] He's just so dreamy and the way he talks just sucks me in. It's like he has his own gravitational pull.

-

You sat yourself down on the bed on the far side of the room, right next to the wall, it made you feel safe being so far away from everything. You were sure that people watching right now would think you are so dramatic for getting panicked over such a small thing but you've always been a pretty sensitive person, especially when it comes to people touching you when you least expect it. Don't get me wrong, you're all for a good fuck but it has to be with the person you want, you aren't a free for all.

There was a knock at the door and you weren't expecting Rhia to walk in and head straight towards you. If anything, you thought Patrick would come in to carry on sweet-talking you.

"Hey, hunny," she says, sitting next to you.

"How did you know I was in here?" You ask. "I said I was going to the bathroom."

She chuckles. "I'm a woman too, y/n. I know when we lie."

You laugh at her response.

"You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm alright, I just didn't really want Patrick to do that. I know it's only his arm around my shoulder but he just genuinely isn't my type anyways and he'd literally just got there too." You explain.

"I understand," she says. "It's completely normal for you to get a little anxious over it, it probably caught you off guard. I'm sure that when you go back down there in a minute you'll feel completely fine, you just need to get used to the people here, that's all.."

You nod in response. She was so good at this.

"Come on," she says, offering her hand to you. "Let's go get drunk!"

-

YOU: God, that was so petty of me. Despite that little shake-up, I quite like this place, it seems pretty chilled so far, not too crazy, not too horny. [grins] Yet.

-

Well, Rhia was right. The second you and her got down to where everybody else was sitting, drinking and laughing amongst each other, you felt better. You walked over to sit on one of the outdoor sofas, in between Hyunjin and a girl called Layla and if you were being quite honest, she didn't look too pleased that you had created a barrier between her and him.

"Hey," Hyunjin said, passing you an empty glass and filling it up with what seemed to be gin mixed with lemonade.

"Hey," you reply. "I'm sorry about walking away before, I just needed a little bit of space."

"It's alright, don't stress it. I know Patrick probably caught you off guard a little, I'm sure he meant no harm."

"Yeah, I know. I'm just a little sensitive to those things, that's all," you say, looking up at him.

"We all have our own pace at doing things, others should respect that instead of just assuming you're alright with it," he explains, taking a swig of his drink.

He was too good at talking; you could just sit here all day and listen to him talk about anything and everything. The way he worded things was so genuine and it made so much sense.

"Yeah, I completely get that."

"Anyways," he says. "What are you wearing to the party later tonight?"

"There's a party?" You asked.

-

YOU: Since, uh, when was there a party?!?!?!?

-

"Oh, you must've missed the announcement while you were with Rhia. There isn't a theme or anything, it's just dressing up and looking hot which I'm sure you won't struggle with," he flirts, making your cheeks heat up a little.

"You're one to talk," you smile. "I'm sure you'd look in just about everything. You look like the type."

"Do I look like your type?"

"Maybe."

-

You were getting ready for the party and excited wasn't a strong enough word for how you were feeling right now. You lathered a bold, red lipstick over your lips and puckered them, making sure it was good enough.

"Damnnnn girl, you look so good," Rhia says, standing behind you in the mirror.

"Oh, stop it, I barely changed anything. You, on the other hand - even I'd fuck you and I don't even like women," you joke, making her laugh along with you.

"You have to be joking, you literally look drop-dead gorgeous right now, y/n. I know Hyunjin won't be able to take his eyes off you."

You blush slightly at the thought of him obsessing over you. "What? Why would Hyunjin look at me? why would I care?"

"He is so attracted to you already, I can tell. the way he looks at you is like he's seeing God," she explains, making you smile unknowingly.

"As if."

"You can be in denial all you want, but I know you're getting a big fat snog tonight and there is nothing you can do about it," she says, an excitable tone in her voice.

"I'll kiss him if you kiss Patrick. I know you like him," you say.

"Deal." She smiles, shaking your hand. "But seriously, that dress looks so good on you."

-

YOU: Do I want to kiss Hyunjin tonight? Yes. Do I have the confidence to kiss Hyunjin tonight? Yes. Am I scared in case he isn't attracted to me the way I am to him? Also yes. But either way, I'm having fun tonight [winks]

-

You and Rhia walked down to the newly decorated 'Party Zone' and were greeted by three of the boys. Patrick, Mason, and Harry. As much as you thought Harry was attractive, you didn't see yourself sharing the bed with him tonight. Plus, he seemed smitten with Hollie so you didn't want to step in between them for the sake of a good fuck.

"Hey, ladies!" Mason said, his Australian accent ripping through his words.

God, how you loved accents.

"Hey," you said, accepting the drink he offered you.

"You look amazing," he says, smiling down at you. "Truly amazing."

"Thank you," you say, not much feeling going into it. "You look pretty good yourself."

"Aren't you a little flirt?" He asks, tucking a piece of your hair behind your ear.

"Do you want another drink?" You ask him, taking his glass from his hand.

"Uh, sure," he says stepping back from you so you can go and pour him and new one.

While you're filling up Mason's glass, you hear cheers from Rhia and turn around, Layla and Hollie were strutting down, Layla wearing the most gorgeous dress you've ever seen, and Hollie looking beautiful as always.

Layla had long, blonde hair that travelled all the way down to the bottom of her back; it curled in the most perfect places and she just looked incredible. Still, you hadn't really spoken to her so you didn't know if she was a nice girl or not.

When you had finished with the drinks, you walked back over and handed it to Mason who was now trying to chat up Hollie and let me just say, Harry did not look happy. You could tell from first glance that he liked her.

Hyunjin was the last to arrive and you could see why, he looked amazing. He was wearing a pair of navy blue cargo shorts with a black button-up, the first three buttons completely ignored. His hair was down and you were sure you'd never seen a more attractive man in your life.

You were the first one to go over and approach him. "Hi."

He chuckles. "Hey," he looks you up and down. "You look gorgeous."

"Thank you," you say, a small pink lighting up your cheeks.

"Aren't you going to say how beautiful I am too," he jokes, flipping his hair over your shoulder and making you laugh.

-

HYUNJIN: Listen to me, right. Her laugh is the most adorable thing a man could ever hear. I know I've only known her for like ten hours but I already know for sure that she's gonna be the girl I'll be chasing after.

-

"You do look really handsome, I must say," you compliment, untangling the microphone that's around his neck, grazing your fingers against his skin as you do so.

"Glad I could be of service," he smiles walking down to the others with you.

"Hey, sexy!" Layla shouts, whistling at Hyunjin.

All that Hyunjin does is smile over at her and give her a small "hey" before turning back to the guys and talking to them.

"Doesn't Layla look so good, man?" Mason says, biting his lip as he stares at her.

"I mean, yeah, she looks good but I wouldn't say she's the best-looking girl here," Hyunjin replies, thinking of you.

"Well, who takes your interest then?" Harry asks.

"I've got to say, y/n looks absolutely amazing tonight," he says, looking at you for a brief moment and then back at the other guys.

"She has a great butt but I wouldn't really say her face is all that great," Mason says. "I'm more of an ass guy though to be fair so I'd let her have it."

Hyunjin didn't really like Mason already, based off of that. Had he even looked at your face? You looked beautiful and he was sure that you always would. Oh well, more for him and less competition for you.

You, similarly to Hyunjin, were sat with the girls, discussing how amazing the guys looked tonight and sharing who you thought was the sexiest out of them all.

"I think Harry looks amazing," Hollie says.

"Of course you do, girl. We can all see how much you fancy him," you say.

"You're one to talk, you're practically drooling over Hyunjin," Rhia laughs, earning one from you as well.

"What about Hyunjin?" Layla asks, clearly only just paying attention to the conversation.

"Y/n fancies him," Rhia says. "don't you?"

Layla gives you the dirtiest look you've ever seen when she hears those words. You decide to play on her mind.

"Yeah, he's definitely my favourite here. He just manages to look so good all the time and I don't know how he does it."

"Well, I was talking to him before and I definitely think he likes me the most," Layla chimes, making Rhia chuckle.

"Whatever you say, babe," Rhia says, flipping her hair over her shoulder and taking a sip of her wine.

-

YOU: He likes her too? Honey, please. If there has to be a little war to win over Hyunjin then I will have no problems with doing that.

-

"Okay guys," Mason says, standing up in front of everybody. "Tonight, we're going to be playing the blindfold game. There are no rules. Do whatever you want. Kiss, feel, touch, smell. Anything. We just have to figure out who did what."

We all cheer and Mason declares himself as the person going first as he was the one who presented the game but you just have a suspicion that he's too horny to wait.

Mason places the blindfold over his head, covers his eyes and stands there, waiting for somebody to come up to him.

Layla stands up and walks over to him, wrapping her arms around his shoulders and pulling him in for a kiss. His hands go around her waist as they attack each other's faces, tongues smashing against each other.

Soon enough, it was your turn to stand up in front of everybody and wait for someone to kiss you. Every ounce of you wanted it to be Hyunjin but you had a suspicion that someone would beat him to it.

As you stood there, you felt a pair of large hands place themselves on your waist and slide down to your ass. The man leans in and kisses you with some aggression, he grabs a handful of your butt and lets go, pulling away from the kiss as he did so.

When you think he has at back down, you remove the blindfold and look around, your eyes immediately darting to Hyunjin but he didn't seem to have a very pleasant look on his face. Were you really that bad at kissing? However, before you could point at him, you saw the huge red lipstick stain around Patrick's mouth and knew that it was him.

"It was you, Patrick, wasn't it?" You ask.

"How did you know?" he says, throwing his arms in the air.

"You're wearing my makeup," you laugh, placing the blindfold down on the table ready for the next person.

Hyunjin stands up.

-

HYUNJIN: God, I want y/n to kiss me. Stupid fucking Patrick beat me to it. Looks like there's a little competition here.

-

He places the blindfold over his head and waits. You see Layla stand up but you weren't going to let her take your chance away from you. You cut in front of her and grab Hyunjin's face, listening to the scoff she lets out before sitting back down. You pull Hyunjin close towards you and press your lips into his. He seems to enjoy the kiss and his hands go through your hair and rest on your neck, his tongue slipping into your mouth and wrapping around your own.

Soon enough, you have to pull away and sit back down before he notices who it could be. You could see the smile on Rhia's face and you turned at sat next to her and you were sure you had one yourself.

He removes the blindfold.

"Fucking hell," he sighs, licking his lips slightly.

He looks around the group and his eyes land on you. He points his finger at you, causing you to giggle and nod. A small grin breaks out on Hyunjin's face and it gives you a small sensation in your stomach.

He smiles to himself as he walks back to his seat and sits back down. He had a chance and he knew it.

-

After the party, it was time to have a little bit of free time before the nightly briefing. So, you being you, wanted a little bit of time to yourself and to just chill out before you went back and mingled with the group. However, whilst you were sitting on the bed you had claimed earlier, someone disturbed your peace.

Layla.

"Hey y/n," she says, sounding a bit snotty.

"Hey, Layla. You alright?"

"Oh, as if you care," she snaps. "All you want to do is pounce on other people's men. You can't take Hyunjin from me."

Was she being serious right now?

"Listen, all I did was kiss the boy I like. It's not my fault that you think he's attractive too. I guess he's just gonna have to choose between us because I'm not going to give up on him just because you like him. That's not how it works, babe," you say, standing up and walking out of the room, leaving her to her own devices.

Ironically, when you were heading to the sun loungers, you bumped into Hyunjin.

"Oh, hey y/n," he says, stopping you.

"Hi," you smile. He was so pretty.

"How are you? I didn't really get to speak to you for very long earlier," he asks.

"Yeah, I'm good. Just trying to find a quiet place for a few minutes," you reply.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I'll leave you in peace if you want."

"No!" you blurt, not meaning for it to be that loud. "I mean, no, you can stay."

He chuckles and says, 'Okay then'.

"So how are you liking the retreat so far?" You ask, sitting down with him opposite you, your legs grazing against each other.

"Yeah, it's pretty good at the minute. I have to say, I enjoyed the kiss earlier. It's just a shame it was in front of everybody," he admits, leaning into the conversation.

"Oh really?" you ask, raising your eyebrows and planting a smirk on your face. "How much did you like it?"

"So much," he whispered.

"I'll gladly give you a second taste," you say, biting your bottom lip.

"Bet."

Hyunjin leans in towards you and places his hand on your cheeks. He softly kisses your lips and waits for you to give him a hint that you want more. He slides his tongue along your lips, begging for entrance. Your tongues collide with each other, the kiss getting messier by the minute. You run your hands down his arms and pull away from the kiss, the two of you breathing heavily.

"You're way too good at that," he smiles, pecking your lips.

You giggle at him, pushing him away jokingly, your hand on his bare chest.

"You're so hot," he says, smiling at you.

"You're one to talk," you reply. "I just wish we could go to bed already."

You hoped he understood what you meant and by the look on his face, once he'd processed what you said, he understood it perfectly well.

"Just you wait."

-

YOU: [groans] Hyunjin is just so fucking dreamy. I just want to rip his clothes off. His body is to die for and his lips are just so soft. I could kiss him all day and never get bored. But hey, it's only the first day, who knows what could happen?

-

While you and Hyunjin were talking you heard a melodic chime from beside you and spotted a small cone.

"What the fuck is that?" Hyunjin says, a small chuckle escaping his mouth.

"Hello," the cone says. "I'm Lana."

The both of you say hi back to the cone you have never been more confused in your life.

"Welcome to your first night at the retreat. I hope the accommodations are to your liking.

"It's perfect, Lana. We love it," you say.

"I must say, you all are aesthetically pleasing to the artificial eye."

"Thank you, Lana. The same goes for you." Hyunjin laughs. "I love your cone."

"I must ask you to make your way to the cabana," she says before turning off.

-

We all gathered in the cabana, confused about what was about to happen. What was this cone and why did it talk?

The chime rings out again, making some of the girls jump.

"Hi. I'm your virtual guide."

"Hey, Siri," Mason says, clearly thinking that was the funniest thing in the world.

"Actually, my name is Lana," she says.

"Get told," you say, chuckling.

"Welcome."

"Lana is sounding kinda hot right now. She's very well-spoken, very polite," Harry jokes, making a couple of us laugh along with him.

"However," she says.

-

YOU: However? That is never good, especially on a dating show. What does she mean, however?

-

"You are not here for the reasons you may think. In the last twelve hours, I have been observing you, and learning about your behaviour. It has been most insightful."

"Alright," Hyunjin says. "She's a little weird."

"You have been specially selected as all of you are having meaningless flings over genuine relationships," she says. "The purpose of this retreat is to help you gain deeper emotional connections in your personal relationships."

"You'll have platonic friendships with women, basically," Harry says, a traumatised look on his face, making the other guys laugh.

She has to be joking.

"As an incentive to your development, I have included a grand prize of $100,000."

-

YOU: One hundred grand!? Okay, at first I didn't like her but she's starting to grow on me. Tell me more, Lana.

-

"What do you think we have to do to win?" You ask, everyone giving their own answers.

"If it's washing up or cooking, I might as well go home now," Mason says, laughing.

"However," she says. "There are conditions to your stay here."

"Oh, fuck, here we go," Hyunjin says, wrapping his arm around your shoulders.

"You will have to abstain from any sexual practices for the entirety of her stay."

-

HYUNJIN: Is she fucking serious right now? I've just met the hottest girl I've ever seen in my life and she's telling me I can't have sex with her. What is she gonna do next, tell me I can't kiss her?

-

"That means no kissing, no heavy petting or sex of any kind."

"Is she fucking serious right now?" you say, putting your hands over your face.

"This will also apply to self-gratification."

You have never heard a gasp so loud as in that moment. Why was she doing this to us? All we wanted to do was have fun and maybe one relationship could've come out of it but at the end of the day, it's our body, our choice.

"Right, okay. No sex of any kind," Hollie says.

Lana continues. "Money will be deducted from the prize for any sexual activity."

"No!" Patrick says. "I had a feeling she was gonna say that."

"Welcome to the retreat," she says, turning herself off again.

"Fuck you, Lana," you say as everyone collects their things and walks away.

-

YOU: If she thinks for one minute that I'm keeping my hands to myself for the sake of some money, she can forget it. I signed up for this show to have fun and wasn't going to leave with any money in the first place. Who gives a fuck?

-

It was time for everyone to get into bed. You had thrown on one of your lacy nightgowns that was perhaps a little too sexy for a retreat with no sex but oh well.

Walking into the bedroom was a challenge in itself, the smell of horny people just filled your nose and intoxicated your brain.

You walk over to the bed you had selected earlier in the day and get under the covers, waiting for your desired bed partner to walk in.

Soon enough, Hyunjin came through the door and his eyes immediately went to you, a smile breaking out on his face when he saw you waiting for him. You peel the blanket back so he can get comfortable and lay it back over him once he's sorted.

"Hey," you say, your voice a little quieter than usual.

"hey," he sighs. "These new rules are gonna be the death of me. I don't know how I'm gonna manage a whole entire month without touching you."

"Don't worry, we'll find a way. Who gives a fuck?" you say, earning a small laugh from him.

You feel someone staring into the side of your head so you turn to look at them and it ends up being Layla, a dirty look planted on her face as she sits in bed with Mason.

"What's her problem,?" Hyunjin asks you, quiet enough so she won't hear him.

"She likes you and hates the fact that I pushed in front of her earlier when we were playing the blindfold game to kiss you," you explain. "She argued with me about it before and she's absolutely furious that you're paying more attention to me than her."

He chuckles and rolls his eyes. "Of course, I'm going to pay more attention to you. You're the only one in here worth my time. Plus, you're the one I'm most physically attracted to which is helpful."

"Yeah, I suppose that's a good thing," you joke.

-

It was the morning and you woke up in Hyunjin's arms, your head buried in his chest and his hands placed perfectly around your waist. The lights automatically turned on, making you shut your eyes and groan.

"For fuck sake."

You hear a deep chuckle from next to you and realise that Hyunjin is now awake.

"How long have you been up?" You ask, smiling at him.

He places a hand on your hair and strokes through your hair. "Not long, I woke up just before the lights turned on."

"Me too," you groan.

"You are so gorgeous," Hyunjin smiles, looking down into your eyes.

"Stop it," you blush.

You didn't actually want him to stop. You had never felt this way about someone before, never felt this flustered at something so simple as a compliment.

"I'll only stop if you stop being so beautiful."

You giggle and hide your face in his neck. "Stop it!"

"Well, aren't you two adorable?" A voice calls from across the room.

"Shut up, Patrick."

-

YOU: I can't believe this place. I'm surrounded by horny people and I can't even kiss one of them. All I want to do is rip Hyunjin's clothes off and have a good time but stupid Lana won't let me do that.

-

inspo by @seospicybin

[blackbatcass]

how would you rank bat-children from bruce's least favorite to favorite? also i'd say do the same for ollie's kids but he would kill himself if you made him do that (mia still his fav though)

oh my god you guys do want me dead💀

I'll be honest, i don't think there's much value to be found in 'rank-the-favorites' discussions. like the honest answer is 'it depends' and i just don't think it's productive. I do think that in most cases wrt relationships with bruce, dick is always going to come out on top. as i've said those two are just on a whole other level. they Know Each Other in a way that no one else will even come close to. I don't think it's controversial to posit that actually raising dick from childhood adds a layer to the relationship bruce has with him that really can't be replicated with anyone else. like...jason was with him for 2-3ish years as a tweenager, cass and tim were adopted in their mid teens. meanwhile bruce was effectively dick's parent from age 8 onwards.

I also think the timing is something that would be almost impossible to replicate. dick entered the picture very early into bruce's years as batman. bruce was the one solid thing in dick's life after his parents died. they were literally each other's crutches through all that emotional turmoil and became, for better or for worse, extremely codependent. all that to say, dick and bruce's relationship is just so crazy insane that pretty much nothing compares. he just has the advantage. you can't recreate the mind bogglingly deep connection 25 yo bruce had with 8yo dick grayson it just can't be done.

on the other hand, cass also has something with bruce that can't be replicated by anyone else: she is Exactly Fucking Like Him. she is his carbon copy. they Get each other's rock-solid convictions & moral code sooo deeply. fandom tends to use this as evidence to point towards cass being the favorite child, but like as greta mysterycitrus has eloquently said in the past, she is exactly like him (derogatory). bruce obviously loves cass deeply, that is his daughter, but I don't think having that relationship with her is always easy for him. her existence points out some uncomfortable truths about himself that he doesn't always want to confront. I mean... if you were to meet yourself as a seventeen year old it would probably be weird as FUCK lol. I especially think the fact that cass has killed someone really fucks with his head and forces him to reevaluate his own morals/worldview.

and like...I don't think he always treats cass fairly. we see it over and over again in bg 2000. he thinks he knows what's best for her because he sees himself in her, but the things he thinks are best for himself are Not Healthy to say the least. he intentionally keeps himself at a distance because he initially did not want that close, father-daughter relationship with her: it was strictly batman and batgirl. and he thought that's what she wanted/needed. but being so singlemindedly driven to a cause with no boundaries or normal life is not exactly the best way to go for a teenager. so I think those two had a lot to figure out when the dust settled.

I have much fewer thoughts about jason, tim and damian simply because they are not my blorbos like dick and cass are lmfao. i do think tim deserves a whole lot of credit for stepping in to save bruce and helping when bruce was at his lowest. like. that was obviously NOT easy lol. bruce and tim are interesting because bruce held himself back from being a father to tim for so long, when jack was still in the picture. but when it comes to a head and tim gets adopted, it's just...natural? like there was nothing else that could have happened there? I am honest to god not the biggest tim fan and have not read enough of his comics to talk intelligently on him any more than that lol. but I do know bruce loves him very very much and would be lost without him<3

jason....jason. I mean what is there to say lmfao. if your dead teenager turned up and started mass murdering what would you do. I think it's pretty obvious to say that losing jason was soul-crushing for bruce and permanently changed him as a person; we see those aftereffects in his relationships to people like tim, steph, and cass. jason will never stop being his son, and bruce will never stop loving him. but things will never be the same again. I don't think jason's actions post-resurrection will ever be justifiable or forgivable to bruce. like even if jason woke up one day like 'suddenly i'm cured of being a villain' I don't think he would be welcomed back with open arms or anything. jason is a murderer. he has killed like a fuckton of people in cold blood. that is something that will never be okay with bruce. grappling with loving your son versus your son being a murderer which is antithetical to everything you have spent decades building...that's rough buddy. is that controversial? idk i spend as little time as possible thinking about jason todd

I think it hurts bruce to look at damian sometimes because he just can't stop seeing talia. I think he loves damian deeply but it isn't always easy. that whole timing of final crisis was just so messy that they didn't get off to a super smooth start and had to do a lot of work rebuilding that relationship. I think damian has to reconcile his childhood hero worship of bruce with the actual very flawed man which isn't easy. it has been a LONG ass time since i've read damian's comics so that's about all I got.

IN CONCLUSION! This is very long and I absolutely did not answer your question sorry. but these are kind of my cliffnotes thoughts on each of the wayne kids' relationships with bruce.

and yeah if you tried to get ollie to rank his kids he would knock himself out with a boxing glove arrow

[teaberrii]

Chapter Twenty: The Ex

Alhaitham has the looks and the smarts. He will also be the stand-in CEO for his grandfather's company for a year.

But, he's been mysteriously cursed to turn into a cat every night since his eighteenth birthday… until he meets you, an employee at his grandfather's company, who rescues him as a cat and changes him back with one kiss.

Alhaitham/You

Notes:

Cross-posted on AO3

Female reader

Chapter index at the end of chapter one

Thoma is driving Ayato home from the hospital that night when Ayato's phone goes off. When Thoma glances at his friend in the rearview mirror, Ayato is already talking to the person on the other end. The call is brief, but from the look on Ayato's face, it isn't good news.

When Ayato slips his phone back inside his pocket, Thoma asks, “Is everything okay?”

"...The lead role they offered me went to someone else."

The car slowly rolls to a stop at a red light. “Is that… bad news? I thought you wouldn’t take it.”

Ayato sighs. “I was seriously considering it.” He looks at Thoma in the rearview mirror. “You were right. I am using acting as a lifeline… but even so, I’m not doing a good job.”

“...Ayato.”

“And this call just proved my point. I know who took the role.” When Ayato tells Thoma the actor’s name, Thoma also knows who he’s talking about. A rising, young actor whose career took off when he had a supporting role in a major drama production that became extremely popular.

“Answer me honestly, Ayato,” Thoma says as the car rolls forward. “Do you really want this role? This is your last chance. If you really want it, you need to say something. There's a chance they'll reconsider."

Ayato doesn’t know what comes over him, but it’s as if Thoma’s words are the final push that leads him to make the call.

“...Yes,” Ayato says after a moment. “I’m willing to audition if that’s how they’ll make the final decision.” As soon as Ayato gets off the phone, he glances at Thoma, who has a small smile. Ayato looks out the window. “You asked me if I want to continue acting, and I do. I don’t hate it. I don’t love it. Regardless, I want to do better.”

And, he might find a more meaningful purpose behind it.

◆◆◆

You’re on a small coffee break with your coworkers the next morning when they bring up Alhaitham dropping out of the panel to determine the company’s next big production. One of your coworkers nudges you.

“Do you think you got lucky? You don’t have to make a big presentation in front of the CEO.”

If only they know you’re dating him. Alhaitham never told you he dropped out, but you can already guess why. And, if you're right, it’s a smart move.

“Are you nervous?” your coworker continues to ask. “It’s coming up in a few days!”

“Well, I’ll put my best foot forward. That’s all I can say.” Then, you pick up your coffee mug and walk out of the lounge, leaving your coworkers wondering what kind of interesting idea you’ll present this time.

You’re about to reach your desk when your phone buzzes. Once you take it out of your pocket, you see that it’s a message from your manager.

It’s urgent. Come to my office now.

What is this about?

When you reach his office and close the door behind you, he doesn’t even gesture for you to sit down.

“Is something going on between you and the CEO?”

You’re so caught off guard by the question that you say the first thing that comes to mind. “What?”

Then, he turns his laptop around and plays a short video that shows Alhaitham coming out of a room. Shortly afterward, you come out of the same room. “This was at the Awards Night, was it not?”

There is only one reason you can think of why that video exists. You remember the crazy reporter and his malicious intent of giving people keychains or charms with a small hidden camera. But… even if someone caught you and Alhaitham… who would blackmail you? And why?

Regardless, nothing could’ve prepared you for this, and you’re at a complete loss for what to say until you finally gather your nerves.

“Nothing happened that night,” you say. “Who sent this?"

"It was sent anonymously."

You almost roll your eyes. Right. Of course. 

"Isn't this illegal?" you ask. "Filming someone without their permission?"

As you listen to your manager talk, you start wondering if he’s worried about you or the company’s reputation. You agree that a CEO dating an employee doesn’t sound professional and can lead to a whirlwind of gossip. But that shouldn’t be any reason for you and Alhaitham to break up. 

“Do you know if anyone else has this video?” you ask. "Because I didn't know about this until you told me."

“I don’t, and I hope no one else does."

You want to ask if this is such a big deal. There's nothing scandalous in the video, but perhaps it's about the speculations. The rumours. Even though you're not a public figure, Alhaitham is. At least with his tenure as CEO. If it comes down to it, you or Alhaitham might have to clarify what you two were doing together.

Once you leave your manager’s office, your phone buzzes. It’s a text from Alhaitham, and you quickly enter an empty meeting room to take his call.

“...I saw the video,” he says after listening to you recall what happened with your manager. “It was also sent to me.”

Well, that's just great. Does that mean the rest of the company has seen it, too?

“Did that person want anything from you?” you ask.

“...No, surprisingly.”

That's strange. You’d thought that this person would demand money, at least.

"Let me get this straight," you say. "They just sent you a video and... that's it?"

"I have my speculation. We obviously have more questions than answers, and perhaps this is what they want."

"Playing mind games, huh? That's dirty."

“Regardless, whatever the reason, I won’t let them get away with it.” Alhaitham looks out the window. “I won’t let anything happen to you. I promise."

As you're heading back to your desk, you go through all of your emails on your phone. Apparently, this person is too cowardly to contact you directly. You're so busy on your phone that you don't notice Ayato and Childe walking toward you.

"Busy, busy, I see."

You look up upon hearing the familiar voice. “Ayato!”

Childe frowns. “Aren't you forgetting someone?"

“And Childe.”

“That’s better.”

You look at Ayato. “What are you doing here? Another shoot?”

"Some last-minute touches," Ayato says. "But… you might see me less often from now on."

You’re about to ask why when Childe spills the beans. “Just between us… he’s going to be busy rehearsing for a lead role.”

“A lead role… that’s huge!”

Ayato smiles. “I guess you can say I’m finally taking a step forward.”

“We’re going to be losing one of The Strays pretty soon,” Childe says. When you smile, he does too. “Well, you finally smiled.”

“Hm?”

“You looked a little down,” Ayato says. “Is everything okay?”

“...Ah. Well, sort of, I guess,” you say quietly. You lower your voice, and after telling them what happened, both of them look baffled. Then, Childe’s expression turns stern and Ayato frowns.

"That's ridiculous," Childe says. 

“As… crazy as that sounds,” Ayato begins, “You’re in good hands if Alhaitham is dealing with it.”

You sigh. “I know. But still… I’m just… a little rattled.”

“Well, it’s not just Alhaitham who has your back,” Childe says. He and Ayato look at each other. “If anything happens, we’ll be there for you. And if it’s any reassurance, I didn’t get that video… which means I doubt anyone else has gotten it, too.”

“...I hope so.”

“My, what a crowd.”

You recognize the voice almost immediately. When you turn around, your guess is right. "Kaeya!" Tighnari is beside him, holding a laptop. “And Nari!”

“Hiya.”

Kaeya’s eyes don’t stay on you for long. He glances at Childe, who’s looking at him with a small frown.

“Today is just full of surprises,” Childe mutters.

Kaeya chuckles. “You’re right. Good surprises, though.” He looks at Ayato. "You must be Kamisato Ayato."

The two men shake hands as Ayato says, "Yes. And you are...?"

"Kaeya. Kaeya Alberich."

“What brings you here?” you ask.

“We had a meeting for Sumeru Geographic,” Tighnari says.

“It couldn’t have been online?” Everyone turns to Childe.

Then, you and Tighnari glance at each other. In an attempt to break the semi-awkward silence, Tighnari says, “In-person meetings are usually better, don't you think? You get to see everyone's faces.” When Childe frowns at him, Tighnari wonders if he said something wrong.

“Lumine told me you aren’t coming to the party,” Kaeya says. “It’s a shame.”

You look at Childe as he says, “Oh, don’t worry. I’ll still be there. Maybe just not in the way you expect.”

“...That doesn’t sound slightly threatening,” you say quietly.

Kaeya smiles. “Well, you’re always welcome.”

“We should get going,” Tighnari says. “We have another meeting.”

As Tighnari and Kaeya walk off, Ayato says, "He's quite charming."

“A fake pretty boy,” Childe mutters.

You and Ayato glance at each other, and Ayato swings an arm around Childe. You pat his back.

“So... about what you said earlier..." Then, you lower your voice. "Does this mean you're infiltrating a party as a cat? What an exciting life.”

“Truly living the dream,” Ayato adds. "It would make a great series. Childe's Catventures. A catchy title if I do say so myself."

Childe frowns. "Oh, I'm sure it'll be a hit until I claw someone's eyes out."

"Hopefully not Kaeya's," you say quietly, and Childe gives you a deadpan look.

As you and Ayato smile at each other, Childe’s phone goes off. You watch him answer it, and his face quickly turns serious.

“What do you mean we lost some of the footage?”

A pause.

“...Uh huh. Yeah.” Childe looks at Ayato. “Yeah, I’m with him right now. Sure. We’ll be right there.” As soon as Childe gets off the phone, he says, “One of the interns accidentally corrupted the audio file for the scene we just shot, and now there’s no sound. They’ve already tried fixing it, but nothing’s working.”

“I suppose this means we have to reshoot,” Ayato says.

Childe sighs. “Yes, but the problem is that the actress has already left. They can’t get in touch with her.” Then, he looks at you and smiles. “Do you happen to have time right now, Mademoiselle?”

“...You aren’t asking me to act, are you?”

“It's just a small scene. You'd be the closest person we have who can pass as the original actress." Childe gives you an innocent, desperate look. “Please?”

Can you really say no?

◆◆◆

It's the first time Signora has been to the CEO's office, but she has mixed emotions. Alhaitham had reached out to her directly, saying that there was a matter he wanted to discuss with her. The only problem is that he never specified what it was.

She knocks on the door. As soon as she hears “come in”, she opens it and sees Alhaitham sitting at his desk with a stern expression.

“...You wanted to see me?” she asks.

“Take a seat.”

When she does, Alhaitham turns his laptop to her and plays the video. “...This video was sent from your laptop.”

Not even five seconds in, Signora looks puzzled. “What is this?”

Alhaitham turns his laptop back. “You tell me. This was in my inbox this morning.”

Signora holds up a hand to stop him. “Hang on. You’re saying that someone sent that video using my computer?”

“...Are you saying you didn’t send it?”

Signora was walking along an empty corridor, looking for her way back to the main hall for the Award ceremony when she heard faint voices. When she looked around the corner, she saw Alhaitham coming out of a room. As soon as he disappeared down a set of stairs, Signora saw you walking out of the same room. S he raised a brow. Well, that wasn’t suspicious at all.

“I saw the news about that reporter hiding cameras in keychains he gave to people that night.”

“You took one from him?” Alhaitham asks.

“I had no idea there was a camera in there. So, when I saw the news, I had a friend look into it. He took the keychain apart and got whatever footage that stupid camera recorded.”

“...A friend?”

"I know he didn't watch any of it. I was with him."

“So, you never saw this video.”

“No," Signora says. "I admit I saw you and her that night. I never knew it was caught on camera.” She looks him in the eyes. “It wasn’t me who sent that video to you.”

“What about your friend?”

“...Dottore?”

When Signora stays quiet, Alhaitham says, “You look a little conflicted.”

“I don’t see why he would do this.”

Her guess is as good as his. Alhaitham hasn't the slightest clue about who this person is, but you must know him… right?

◆◆◆

You sigh out of relief as soon as the shoot is over. It's a small scene, but the mental fatigue is kicking in.

“Was this your first time in front of a camera?"

You turn to Ayato who’s still in costume. “Does posing for normal photos count?” you joke.

Ayato smiles. “You’re a natural.”

“Ah, you’re too kind, Ayato. But thank you. I did my best.”

“Well, I’d say you two are a hit.” Childe walks up to you and Ayato. “The director likes this better than the one that was originally filmed.”

“You also worked hard, Childe,” you say.

“It’s the first time I saw someone do a complete rewrite on the spot,” Ayato adds.

Childe waves his hand dissmisvely. 

Then, your phone starts going off. At first, you think it’s something for work. Well, you aren’t completely wrong.

Oooh, they’re cute!

I’d buy the snack they’re advertising hahah

They look good together

When you finally find the source of the comments from your colleagues, you're getting an influx of messages from people joking about whether you're changing careers or making your "much anticipated" acting debut. Someone had taken a short clip of you and Ayato together on set and shared it internally, getting tons of reactions.

Well, you guess it’s better than the other video going viral.

When you get an incoming call from Alhaitham, you quickly step aside to take it.

“...Do you know someone named Dottore?”

You stiffen at the name. “Why do you ask?”

After he tells you what he learned from Signora, your jaw almost drops. It sounds like something that only happens in fiction. You should know. After writing so much of it, after all.

Alhaitham says your name which makes you say, “I… yeah, I do know someone named Dottore.” You sigh. “...He’s my ex.”

Alhaitham unconsciously grips his phone tighter.

◆◆◆

You're heading to your school reunion after work, but your mind is on other things. Perhaps Dottore heard about you from Signora. You were also on TV. There was also the photo incident with Ayato. In other words, it feels like you're a public figure now with everything that's happened.

The thought of Dottore possibly stalking you is enough to give you goosebumps. Thinking back to when you first got together... he might've already shown some questionable behaviour.

It was like a scene out of a movie. Dottore had you caged against a locker in an empty hallway. Both of you had arrived earlier than usual for school. You were here to study at the library for your first-period test. Dottore was here to work out.

“I couldn’t hear you,” he said, leaning closer to you. “Could you say it again?”

You were a blushing, nervous mess. It only took about half a year for the guy you’ve been crushing on to notice you.

“...I… I like you.”

Dottore smiled, though it didn’t reach his eyes.  “I like you, too, kitten.”

Once the bus doors open, you quickly get off and head toward Lambad’s Tavern. You bump into Dehya on your way there, and you let her rant a little about what's been going on at work before she picks up that you seem a little off. After telling her what happened, Dehya is at a loss for words.

“Good God. That's like... borderline threatening."

"It definitely messes with your mind," you mutter.

“I agree he could've easily heard about you, but how would he know who your manager is? That's stalker behaviour."

You push open the doors to Lambad’s Tavern when you hear, “Oh, c’mon, Collei. Don’t be like that. We’re all old friends, aren’t we? Besides, he’s in town just this week!”

You face forward and you freeze upon seeing the red eyes that once made your heart race.

“Long time no see, kitten.”

◆◆◆

Back at the office, Alhaitham has just finished a meeting. He closes his laptop and rubs his tired eyes. Is there a possibility Dottore will show up at your reunion tonight? Just as Alhaitham mulls this over, he gets a notification that the semi-viral video of you and Ayato got taken down. 

You’d told him about it, including the story behind it. While Alhaitham is proud of you for stepping out of your comfort zone, he's bothered by the comments. You and Ayato look good together? Alhaitham takes that as you and Ayato are professionals. Still, Alhaitham sighs. Maybe it won't bother him as much if people know about your relationship.

How long will this secret relationship continue?

Bzzt. Bzzt.

Kaveh: Hey junior. Up for a drink tonight?

A drink, huh? That doesn’t sound like a bad idea.

Where?

Kaveh: Lambad’s Tavern 😀

Chapter Twenty-One

Tag list: @suoshiii @lordbugs @seirenspinel @lxry-chxn @sakiimeo @ash-in-lavender @ceylestia @deathkat657 @forsh4dow @kalpie @elernity @sentieence @chichibleeps @sunsethw4 @hjjks @nqctre @just-simping-over-genshin @tanspostsblog @uchihaeirin @vynbin @ayanokomu @dksfl920 @alatus1808 @itztaki @thetwinkims @imkaaayy @angeilix @starlighttotheleft @letthewindlead @thelonelyarchon @certaindreampost @winterpein @theprinceofkhaos @vvyeislazzy

[p-redux]

You know, I am stunned at the lack of logic and critical thinking in this fandom. It’s like those with extreme opinions have such strong confirmation bias that they can’t get out of their own way. When I read some of these posts on lots of different blogs, I am struck at the logical questions that are never truly answered- well except by ad hominem attacks and logical fallacies and extensive conspiracy theories.

1. Wouldn’t a TV show that’s not on a well-known and popular streaming service love the PR they’d get if their costars were actually in love and in a real life relationship? What value does the production company gain by keeping them hidden for almost 10 years? I can’t logically see that it would bring more profits. So we’re supposed to love a loyal, brave, committed, and family-oriented Jamie, but we need a single, sexy Sam to sell the show?? Cognitive dissonance anyone?

2. Now that it’s well established that Sam and Caitriona essentially ARE Outlander and are EPs, wouldn’t they have the power to say no more if this “ narrative” was true? If they quit, there’s no OL. Couldn’t they refuse to film anything else if they aren’t allowed to tell the truth (if it’s hidden)? It’s interesting that Ron and Terri are married, Maril and Matt have twins together, but S and C were forbidden to be together? I would think that could be a legitimate lawsuit. Didn’t they renegotiate new contracts since the first season?

3. Do people actually believe that Sam and Caitriona are good people, philanthropic people, hard working entrepreneurial people, wonderful human beings but at the same time think that either of them would actually lie about their own children? With Sam’s childhood, people honestly think he would deny his kids AND be away from them for months? That they both would lie and deceive us about her father’s funeral?

4. So it’s been 10 years and NOT ONE person associated with either of them has publicly and clearly stated, with no doubts or other possible connotations, that they are really together? No costars? No personal friends? No teacher of their kids? No hospital personnel where the kids were born? No extras on OL? No crew members- even those that have been gone long enough that any NDA they signed about the production would have expired? No hotel staff where they may have traveled with their kids? No former “fake gfs” who might be pissed? No friends of “ fake gfs” that want to defend their friend and set the record straight? Not one person who has been associated with OL who might just think this is harmful to children? No photos of them with kids in public- clear photos, not reflections or someone in the background that we cannot clearly identify? Not videos where we cannot tell who is actually there? Wouldn’t someone somewhere have gotten a photo of them together as a family? In ten years? Have you P, seen evidence that I haven’t? I have seen nothing but reflections, blurry images, unidentifiable people in the background. Am I missing something?

5. About their chemistry- they aren’t the only actors I have ever seen that have great chemistry but no real romantic relationship. There are lots of them. It’s like people don’t know what actors actually do. So much of chemistry in acting between actors is about trust and respect for the work. Even some of the best chemistry has been between actors who didn’t really like each other in real life, but were able to use their chemistry and their talent to create characters we believed loved each other.

6. Lastly, I can’t wrap my brain around liking and respecting these two actors for their work and for their real lives, while claiming every day they are lying to me.

People see what they want to see or what they need to see to support their position.

Occam’s Razor tells me that the simplest explanation is often the best one.

Hopefully when OL finally ends, these two will get some peace.

Now, watch the “but what about ______? “start.

Bless you Anon for summarizing everything I and countless other SANE fans have been saying in the Outlander fandom for the last 9 years. The thing is...some Extreme Shippers continue to ship for a few reasons. I put them in these categories:

1. OG shippers who have invested SO many YEARS in their SamCait fantasy ship. They want to "save face." It's embarrassing to acknowledge that you were fed and believed a LIE for so long. Their egos can't handle it, so they'd rather double down, and find a way to pretzel their brains around things that are obvious facts to the rest of us. They don't want to feel like they "lost." So, they just keep on denying the TRUTH and the mountains of evidence showing that Sam and Cait are not a couple in real life. The alternative is too painful to them. It's been too much time, too much energy, too much of themselves invested in the ship, and they are missing something in their real lives. The ship fills that void.

2. New fans to Outlander who have recently discovered it. They've gone down the rabbit hole of shipper Tumblr, Facebook, Instagram and Twitter X accounts and they haven't climbed their way out yet to blogs like mine, and other Non-Shippers.

3. The Fake Shippers who pretend to be shippers to MAKE MONEY off those still clinging on to the life boats. There are still bloggers and shipper groups who know they have a captive audience in shippers holding out hope that some of what the original shipper leaders sold them might actually be true. These fake shippers manipulate gifs, pictures, videos, SHOW shippers what they WANT to see. They keep them hanging on with podcasts, magazine, subscriptions. They sell them trips to Scotland, conventions t-shirts, mugs, daily "proof" that Sam and Cait secretly live together with their 5 bairns. And because con artists are experts at conning people, they make everything believable...and some poor souls buy what they're selling. Literally BUY 💵 what they're selling. Sadly, this fandom is filled with a lot of retired women with disposable income, who are lonely or disillusioned with their own lives. And they are easy pickings for the money hungry fake shippers.

So, in summary, the reason there are still some SamCait Shippers is a combination of fake shippers SELLING them the fantasy AND women needing to STILL hold onto the fantasy. With a few actually mentally unwell women thrown in here and there, who have diagnosable mental health issues.

It's actually quite sad. If only they had gotten off the ship with the rest of us years ago, they could have been enjoying celebrating REAL love. Instead, they're on a constantly rocky ship that causes them disappointment more often than not. Here, on terra firma, no one needs Dramamine. It's lovely. Because it's REAL. 💞

[escapedaudios]

Hello! My name is Grim, and I fancy myself a bit of a researcher. Now, this is not for anything important or extremely serious. Instead, this is mostly for my own pure enjoyment and something I have in the works that is to be posted on Tumblr. You are not obligated to answer any or all of these questions I have posed. I know it’s a bit much. Feel free to add any additional input! Thanks for your consideration!

1. How different do you think your work would be, in terms of getting across a point, in a different medium thats not Audio RP?

2. How do you think your work would be different if it more reflected main stream industry forms of storytelling where you as a creator would be more separate? (ex. movies, tv shows, games, etc.)

3. How important do you find the voice acting in your work?

4. If you had the choice, would you stop voice acting in your work and take a step back to focus on narrative work?

5. Do you believe your ability to voice characters enhances the story overall?

6. Do you enjoy the idea of a “Listener character” or would you better prefer to not have one?

7. As a writer, how does the writing of the Listener take you out of your comfort zone? (ie their effect in relationships, plot movements, etc.)

8. Is Audio RP your favored form of art?

9. How do you believe Audio RP differs from main stream forms of art/entertainment?

How different do you think your work would be, in terms of getting across a point, in a different medium thats not Audio RP? I've toyed around with re-writing some scenes of my work in screenplay or novel format as a creative exercise. I love the immersive nature of audio roleplay, but there are some limitations. I do wish I could reveal things through visuals that are too quiet or subtle to work in audio roleplay. For example, in the alternate version of Matador Gothic, Scythus reveals himself by puppeteering a dead body under the last street light that he left functional, then stepping into the light and revealing his monstrous and blood-soaked face.

How do you think your work would be different if it more reflected main stream industry forms of storytelling where you as a creator would be more separate? (ex. movies, tv shows, games, etc.) I would make longer, more complex projects with longer periods of time between release. If I was working in legacy media for a mainstream studio, and had the backing of traditional advertisement and distribution I wouldn't be dependent on being recommended by an algorithm or on remaining relevant to inherently fickle online audiences. I would love to have the freedom to be able to work on a project for months or years without losing my ability to reach people. I would also indulge far more in controversial and uncomfortable topics. As a content creator you are extremely vulnerable and extremely dependent on the good will of the social media climate in a way that producers of legacy media are not. As a YouTuber I am also subject to the content restrictions of the platform. If I were making movies or shows, I'd be writing scripts for much more R-rated media.

How important do you find the voice acting in your work? Voice acting quality is important, but not the most important thing. I think the acting quality is roughly as important as the production quality, but nothing is more important than the script. A good script can greatly elevate a mediocre performance, but a good performance can't elevate a mediocre script.

If you had the choice, would you stop voice acting in your work and take a step back to focus on narrative work? I technically do have a choice because I can quit whenever I want and focus on something else, so I guess the answer is no. The only thing that would make me take that switch is if I was offered some massive opportunity as part of a professional studio.

Do you believe your ability to voice characters enhances the story overall? You mean me personally, or in general? Because the answer is yes to both.

Do you enjoy the idea of a “Listener character” or would you better prefer to not have one? I love the idea of a Listener character! It's what makes audio roleplay unique and what separates it from audio plays. Besides the element of immersion, I'm always happy to see the different ways that members of the audience interpret the way their listener's speak, look, act, react, and feel throughout the story. It is at times frustrating to write given things like the limitations of implied dialogue, but I have a net positive view on them.

As a writer, how does the writing of the Listener take you out of your comfort zone? (ie their effect in relationships, plot movements, etc.) It's a real challenge to write implied dialogue and make it feel authentic, that's for sure! When revising my scripts, the majority of my edits are changes to make the implied dialogue more fluid, reactive, and less repetitive (ex: removing crutch phrases like "what do you mean by..." or "so you're saying..."). Writing it to convey information while also leaving room for the audience to roleplay and freely interpret the scene is difficult but rewarding!

Is Audio RP your favored form of art? I've never thought about what my favored artistic medium is, but it might just be. I've consumed more audio roleplays in the past three years than movies, books, comics, and tv shows combined. Hard to say! I'm still a big movie buff, and I have an especially strong fascination with movies made by writer-directors.

How do you believe Audio RP differs from main stream forms of art/entertainment? Before I answer this, I'll need to give the caveat that I think the potential of audio roleplay has barely even been scratched at this point. It's such a new medium that it has a ton of room to grow. That said, I feel like audio roleplay is naturally the most effective form of immersive storytelling. Using sound to allow for interpretive, imaginative, and partly interactive storytelling just works. There's a natural fluidity there that doesn't exist in literature written in the second person point of view, and a range of imaginative freedom that can't fit into immersive video games, and a perspective that simply can't exist in visual media like movies, comics, or television. It's also an art form that is entirely amateur-driven and friendly to remote collaboration and low-budget projects. This environment of collaborative, low-overhead, amateur-driven story production opens the path for a lot of unique and fresh plot concepts, new perspectives on old tropes, and new ways of conveying narrative that have never been seen before.

[spawksstuff]

Star Trek East Cruise 15-18 May 1987 Part 2

De's Q&A Session. The video was too large so I upload it to Youtube. The cuts in the video aren't mine, that's how the original is. His hat says "Trekcruise'87" and his shirt says "Trust me I'm a Doctor." Transcript below.

I'm a doctor not a sailor. So you're all-is everybody here from Florida? Hey, how about that, isn't that nice? What about Utah. Ok forget it.

Listen, again I want to tell you-can you all hear me? You hear me? I want to tell you how happy I am to be with you on this cruise. And everything down in sickbay is going swimmingly. My first patient this morning was James Doohan, then nurse Christine came in, and then of all people lil Sulu.

Would you believe little Sulu was hungover? But he was. Walter hasn't even shown up yet. Oh there he is! They finally brought him up, beamed him up.

Listen, I'm going skip all the preliminaries, I also come here to learn from you. I-we all learn everything from the fans. You tell us first what's going to happen. so you ask me a question, and then if I can't answer it I'm sure you can. So does anyone have a question? No? Well it's back to the bar.

About the fifth movie. I don't know. I haven't heard anything from Walter Koenig yet, he's my source. They're in the very embryonic stage of making this fifth movie and there's been nothing really released about it, only with the exception- I'M SPEAKING OVER HERE.

I hate those foreign boats [Note, they had already docked at Nassau at this point]. So I understand-AHOY. [Sounds like really bad Spanish]. You have to speak all of those languages to travel. Nothing has been really released on Star Trek five, only our good captain as you know is going to direct it and we're anxiously awaiting to see what they're going to do as much as you are. I wish I could help you more. Anyone else?

How do I feel about the new series? Sick. (laughing). No I have high hopes for it. I'm sure Paramount feels that they have a very worthwhile and viable product in Star Trek and they would like to see it go on and on and I feel that it is in the very best hands possible with Gene Roddenberry. If anyone will be able to make it work,

Naturally we have mixed feelings, you would too after 20 years.

It's a rather strange feeling to wake up and see the trade papers that they're doing a new Star Trek. It's the first time I've ever really felt like "he's dead, Jim." But I'm hoping for their sake that it will be a success. And I hope you will continue to look at our year-to-year movies. You're going to enjoy number six, I'll tell you that.

That's not the one I'm directing, but I've written the story idea for it. I can tell you that because I wrote it and it concerns all of us going to the proper rest home. It's going to be a lulu(?) you're going to like it, we're going to fool you.

Another question. Yes? Have I written anymore poetry? No not since...

Uh I had heard how he spoofed, no I have-my experience has been very unique with Star Trek fans. I find them very loving, peace-loving people, very courteous, and extremely intelligent.  So I have nothing but fondness for all of you and great respect for all of you and were it not for you, of course, none of us would be here.

Yes? In other words, you were glad to see the humor come back in? Yes we all were because I think everybody has forgotten, and people that didn't follow Star Trek really didn't remember just how much humor we did through the years. Gentleman standing over here, David Gerold, can testify to that with "The Trouble with Tribbles". But that picture felt more, to all of us I'm sure, like what we used to do. And I've often said I wish we had done that earlier in the series, something of that nature because this film has picked up a crossover audience, which is very nice. People are enjoying it simply as a motion picture, it's lovely.

Yes? Will there be a more sense of family in the next movie? I certainly hope so but none of us really know what the story is going to be about.

Yes? Was it for acting purposes that I dropped my first name "Jackson"? No, I never knew I had that name until I went in the Army. That's true. My family had always addressed me as DeForest, and when I went into the service I found that "Jackson" there. But anytime I would receive a letter addressed to Jackson I knew it was someone from the service. But I did not, I didn't take the name, it's really my name.

Yes, way back there. All of the presidents have libraries in their hometown state, he want to know if there's going to be one for Bones McCoy in Georgia. Well I'll have to speak to President Carter about that. It's a good idea come to think of it.

(The man in the black shirt on the left is Walter Koenig). My experience with Bill has not been that bad to tell you the truth. I must tell you that we very seldom, any of us, see each other on social occasions. We do, we do see each other at Star Trek conventions, we talk by phone occasionally and that sort of thing. But I don't know. Bill really, when Bill wants to be amiable, he has one of the most delightful funny personalities that you've seen on talk shows that you can have. And I think Bill, I think he's a very bright guy, and imaginative and I'm sincerely hoping that he will - my concern is that, and I'm hoping he will be able to bring Star Trek five off beautifully. That's the important thing. 

Yes? I'm just filling...what was that remark? I do make house calls. Yes, one of the few left. Yes, write it down, put it on a piece of paper and sail it on.

Yes? There was no blooper reel made from the movies no. They're two different ball games. The television series, we worked long, fast, and hard hours and there were a lot of released laughs. Motion pictures, you sit around for hours and hours before you do something. And very few things are funny by the time you get on the set. Yes?

I had done a film with Bette Davis and Susan Hayward called "Where Love Has Gone" which was bringing me out of the villain thing, and from that, I went into Star Trek. So I don't know what my future would've been but I would've continued to try to be just a good working actor and let what happens happens.

Ladies and gentlemen it's been a pleasure. And a line from my poem, "if you're wondering now what's with Kelley, what's with his life, he's still in the valley, with the very same wife."

[chaifootsteps]

So anyway. I'm enraged <3 everything about the music video makes me mad <3 I figured at LEAST if nothing else it was nice that Paranoid DJ got some more recognition. Honestly, amazing for him! He's a stand up chap and he deserves every good thing that's ever come his way. Like Micheal, Ashley and other unsung heros he did SO MUCH for hazbin/helluva and making us fall in love with the characters. BUT. THEY. BARELY. CREDITED HIM. And I am mad. I'm even more mad she did nothing in the video captions other than stick a middle finger up to her haters and the drama of the week. That is not the spirit of indie I fell in love with where she used to thank all her viewers and supporters, staff and collaborators. So instead I decided to look for something happy! SPINDLE'S PRECARIOUS FINANCES: https://graphtreon.com/creator/VivienneMedrano Notice on the graph the steady drop in subscribers Viv has gotten on her patreon since this time last year, 2022. (5.1k to 3.5k) If I'm being generous and looking at her peak a few days ago, (because everyone drops their sub and resubscribes at the end of each the month) she makes about 5.7k a month which adds up to 68.4k a year. Which could sound like an okay salary for ONE person but her patreon says she employs "100+ artists and crew members". that is 100+ people she is paying. I spent forever learning about youtube pay rates tonight. RPM is the term used for the amount a youtuber makes per 1000 ad views and it varies SO MUCH its hard to say what Viv's RPM is. BUT!!! The average rpm for a youtuber is $18. However many many forums have discussed that the category of a video greatly changes its rpm. For example, finance and tech videos have a top rpm due to their demographic (more affluent viewers that advertisers want to target) the younger/poorer the video's audience demographic is, the lower the rpm. Gamers are considered among the lower paid but EVEN LOWER THAN THAT are animators. They make PENNIES. (which is kind of sad because they have the highest effort videos and can't mass produce) I've seen animators say they get about 40 to 60 cents per 1000 views. I have no idea what vivziepop makes from youtube but I think it could be $600-18,000 as an absolute ceiling per 1 mil views.

Again, she has an entire studio to pay. Therefore, MOST of spindles money comes from merch and when you factor in the EXTREME oversaturation of merch with the declining viewers, toxic fandom and obvious loss of interest from die hards (based on her patreon) her merch sales are PLUMMETING. Her vacation money right now is probably from her Hazbin contract. Apparently for first time show runners, they make about $30,000 per episode. That's $240,000 she made for season 1 and will make maybe that much or more for season two. It's a good amount of money!! But with her spending rates, the mortgage on her home (that can't be paid off if she was begging for money to pay her dentist in 2019 and hadn't bought the house yet), her lifestyle and studio are NOT sustainable unless hazbin/helluva is her just her foothold in the industry and not the apex of her career.

While she's living the high life like she's 'made it' her whole career is in a very precarious place and what matters the most right now is her online conduct and the quality of her products to determine if she will find work in the future. Of course on the most pessimistic front, she could probably pull it together and do what she does best and leech off other peoples talents for the rest of her career. (eg stepping back, becoming the ceo of spindle and bringing in a network of indie shows by talented new creators that she can slap her name on as a producer and get half the credit)

Anon, there's not a lot of things I enjoy more than good, hard number crunching at Viv's expense. This is sublime.

Hope you're enjoying that Japan-spanning trip full of tea shops and abused animal petting, Viv, because it was probably the worst thing you could have done for yourself at a time like now.

[lover-of-mine]

https://www.tumblr.com/lover-of-mine/756735221115879424/theyre-in-complete-meltdown-she-posted

“Tim should be embarrassed by that interview. How immature to call out your audience because we rightly told you that you weren't giving us what we wanted”

This has to be a child or something because there’s no way a grown 50 plus year old adult really just said how dare the show runner call us out for being nasty because we didn’t get what we wanted 💀💀💀💀💀

That’s called *life* and we don’t always get what we want 🙃 not to mention neither Tim nor the show ever said what they want is what was happening. If they have an issue with not getting what they want/expected then they need to take it up with Lou himself since he’s the one who promised it 🙃🙃🙃

You know, the funny thing to me is that I am usually in the boat with the ship that doesn't stand a chance, so like, I understand the frustration to some degree, like, I was a team Jacob teen watching Jacob go from being described as the Bella's personal sun to whatever Stephanie did with his character, and somehow at age 12 lost in twilight forums I was lying about my age to be in, I was having more productive discussions. You can still send me into a state of rage like I'm some dnd barbarian just by mentioning the 100 season 7 episode 13, even more if you add in the way the actors talked about how the storyline was completely changed from what they were told. Was I threatening to commit arson from the safety of this blog? Probably, if you scroll far enough you might find it. But I wasn't out there fighting actor and crew and journalists and actor's parents. To somehow act like they have some sort of right over the story and that it needs to serve their version of it when the show was extremely clear about where it was going and they were getting played by an actor who took a chance to manipulate a following it's nuts. Frustration is part of fandom. Nothing is ever gonna go exactly the way you want it to with any piece of media. How childish do you have to be to act entitled to an ending just because you want it and paid some random dude with no creative power to tell it was gonna go that way? Tim never promised them anything. And he doesn't have to cather to any of us. “we rightly told you that you weren't giving us what we wanted” what makes anyone think they have any rights to someone elses story? We're all just along for the ride in Tim's sandbox of madness. We have rights to nothing. But Tim on the other hand can do whatever the fuck he wants and that man is making it clear he is not happy. Fans can be mad all they want, but the way they are acting like 911 is somehow a story on choices they can use diamonds to get the ending they want is honestly wild.

[t470n]

One thing that's becoming increasingly obvious is the running theme of Old vs New and how Team New is definitely winning. The whole thing about Jonathan and Mina being very young, like early twenties or something, and their youth being clearly reflected in their behaviour and this clashing with how immensely old Dracula is from his withering body to his ancient castle to the implied centuries of history he has lived through and personally participated in.

Dracula holds onto old ideas about useless peasants being nothing more than an endless supply of cannon fodder that he used to use as meat to throw at his enemies and now uses as food for himself (and his roomies) and there is also his thing about wistfully looking back on the history of his great house. He's happy that the house Jonathan found is old because a new one would have been impossible for him to live in. He has a grossly inflated sense of his own entitlement due to his noble status despite the fact that he is considered a dead man from an extinct lineage. He still considers himself as noble and respectable as he would have been hundreds of years ago, hence why he is so concerned about not being respected/revered in England, his predatory feasting on the local peasants as well as his treatment of Jonathan. Jonathan is a working man who is there in service of Dracula and therefore beneath him. Dracula can barge into his room whenever he wants, destroy his property, force him to acclimate to nocturnal life for Dracula's comfort and use him as a means to an end that will eventually die, in a way using him up just like he does with the local peasants. The way I see their relationship is that Dracula is possessive of Jonathan, not protective. To him, Jonathan is an object for his use that he has taken a fancy to, little more than an entertaining puppy or jester who means nothing in the grand scheme of things because he is hardly his own person, he is Dracula's. It's the same "I am noble therefore I matter and if you aren't noble you are here to be used" mindset that would have been acceptable in the ancient past he comes from but not in the modern day.

On the contrary, Jonathan and Mina are aggressively modern to the point where Jonathan explicitly mentions this when he's afraid ("19th century up to date with a vengeance"). They are young, they write in shorthand and (*SPOILERS FOR LATER ON IN THE BOOK*) there is one point in the story where Good Guy Squad needs to do a lot of blood transfusions which, at the time, was the Hot New Science and extremely modern, hence the complete disregard for blood types which weren't really a thing back then. Jonathan mentions that writing in shorthand would have confused the Count and therefore allowed him to send messages or keep writing that Dracula wouldn't have been able to decipher and being able to keep his shorthand diary does help keep Jonathan sane. Mina also mentions in her letter practising shorthand so she can keep diligent notes on the conversations she hears and oh boy I sure do wonder if that's going to be useful when someone needs to take notes on what happens in the rest of the book. The relationships between the heroes are also very, for lack of a better word, modern. Dracula and his roommates have a clear hierarchy that is very traditional but doesn't exist with the heroes. There is no one person in a position of power over everyone else in the group, including in the individual marriages. Neither Mina nor Jonathan have any more power over the other than the other has over them. They are equals, both mutually in love and mutually intelligent and productive. At the same time, it's fairly non-traditional for three suitors of the same woman to become very good friends. In most traditional narratives of gothic fiction you'd probably find a dual for the Lady's hand, a secret love, some kind of tragic heartbreak or something like that but these are "19th century up to date with a vengeance" young men who will not be so silly. Not to mention the fact that the group mostly comes together because of the relationship between two women which is refreshingly modern. The technology, attitudes, and relationships of the heroes are what set them apart from the Count as well as what lets them succeed.

I just love the dichotomy between the withered villain trying to relive the glory of the ancient past while desperately holding onto expired ideals of bygone days vs the modern and up-to-date heroes making full use of modern technology and stereotype-breaking to defeat him. In a way it almost spits in the face of the very common romanticisation of the past that is especially common in gothic fiction where the pretty old castles and cathedrals make people forget about the endless supply of downsides to those time periods and how horrifically nightmarish it would have been to live in those times if you weren't part of an extremely tiny group of extremely powerful people

[hawkeyedflame]

i guess i'm a touch late but,

2023 was a truly amazing year for me. i feel so blessed to be healthy and alive and experiencing the beauty in the world in spite of all the setbacks i've had over the years.

i was able to travel to canada and see the breathtaking rocky mountains three times this year. my wife was able to visit with me as well, and two of my best friends from out of state traveled down to visit me/us over the summer. our immigration decision will be handed down very soon, and we will finally be able to close this difficult chapter of our lives for good.

my brother and sister-in-law blessed our family with another child over the summer and he is precious in every way. my niece continues to be a joy to watch grow and engage with the world. i got a better job, with much higher pay, a wonderful team of coworkers, and a very generous work-life balance. i picked up running again this year, feeling finally healthy enough to move my body in ways i hadn't been able to in an entire decade, and even started racing again. i'm running a marathon in april with some friends. i go to the gym at work every weekday. i have been hiking and snowboarding. i've taken up learning the irish language, i've re-committed to learning how to draw, and i've been making and maintaining healthy habits slowly over the year. i have friends i see regularly and most days i forget my computer even exists, which is surreal to me as someone who used to be extremely dependent on, probably addicted to, social media and video games as escapism.

my mental health is practically perfect, not even a whisper of depression or anxiety, thanks entirely to my diet, which has in turn allowed an upward spiral of productivity and genuine living that has driven me past merely not being ill, into the territory of being near-constantly joyful and deeply at peace with myself.

i got a tattoo which has become a source of confidence and assurance, a small but bold reminder that i am strong enough to be true to myself and live my life honestly and for the benefit of my family and community. i have brought healing to many people this year and my hope is that the effects continue to ripple outwards into the world over and over.

nearly nothing bad happened to me or my loved ones in 2023. it was easily the best year of my life and i genuinely believe 2024 will be even better. normally i'd cry out not to jinx it, but i believe it will be better because i am better, and i will continue to shape better and better versions of myself. i hope this year will be good for everyone else, too.

[justcallmecj]

Introduction To Dragon Reader

This is the introduction post to my Twst x Ice Dragon!reader series. I made most of these chapters, and this list, a long time ago and will not be making any edits from the already posted product. Because of this, they may not be of the best quality :,) Anyway- The first two chapters after this are normal writing. Everything after that will be prompts given to me by readers or made up by myself! Enjoy and make sure you read the rules before submitting a prompt!

About The Reader/You

Reader will go by they/them pronouns so that all my readers can enjoy

Characters will address Reader as Y/N or a nickname

Y/N is a dragon, meaning they have dragon features(horns, wings, tail, ex.)

Y/N is an ice type dragon with ice abilities(breaths ice, cold resistance, ex.)

Y/N is actually from Twisted Wonderland. They grew up on the outskirts of the Valley of Thorns and is a type of fae(like Malleus)

They attend NRC and are a first year

Y/N is going to be extremely sassy, especially in inner dialogue. Sassy is easier for my to write because I am too

Y/N has two younger siblings and is a very older sibling type person with others(the First Year Squad especially)

Y/N will be sorted into one of the already existing dorms(no Ramshackle for this story, sorry. It still exists tho and will have some importance)

Y/N does have a full dragon form and uses it quite often

Y/N is very close with the other first years, just like in the game. They are also quite close with the dorm leaders

Y/N's unique magic is called Ice of My Blood, it basically paralyzes the target(s), also makes them feel extremely cold

Anything else about Y/N will be discovered in the story or mentioned at later times

 About the Actual Story

Like I already said, Y/N is from Twisted Wonderland, meaning this story won't follow the same isekai story line of the game

I won't be following the events of the game(like the events of the books), instead this will be snippets of Y/N's life in NRC and their adventures with their friends

I will find random prompts to write off of for now, that is until I get suggestions from people

The first chapter will be about Y/N's time during the entrance ceremony(dorm sorting, and their time at the dorm before the first day of school)

After that tho the chapters will be a little willy nilly. They will be about funny or other kinds of experiences and stuff like that

I will write little notes at the beginning of each chapter for a little context and stuff like that

About How I'm Gonna Write This Story

I'm making this story for funny, angsty, fluffy and romance purposes

I actually like writing romance and am fine with writing for any of the characters in the game(minus Ortho, he will only be platonic)

I don't get uncomfortable with most topics so I'm fine with anything really, feel free to say or suggest what you please(but I will not write something if I really don't want to)

I can write things that get a tad bit spicy if that's what you really want but it won't go far. Intense moments of love but nothing explicit

I do curse a lot irl and Y/N probably will as well(remember they have some of my traits as well)

I have a terrible memory at times so if I forget the thing or two I'm sorry

Romances in this book will be with Y/N and another character but if you want one with a character x another character I can write a separate book for that(I do have some character ships from Twisted Wonderland myself)

I'm also gonna use a mixture of the English literal translations used in the English version of the game and the Japanese fan translations(like dormhead, unique magic, and their original UM names.

I sometimes lack motivation to write and my updating consistency will be all over the place

There won't be any Yuu in this story, bc idk how to incorporate that. That also means no Grim because I can't think of anything with Grim but without Yuu

[opinions-about-tiaras]

Hoo boy. So the first look trailer for Wicked is out and... well, I'm concerned. Thoughts below the cut.

Let me add my voice to what everyone else is saying first and get that out of the way; it looks awful. Visually, I mean. "CGI sludge" is an apt description. I get that they're trying to evoke the feeling of the Judy Garland Wizard of Oz but yikes, it looks terrible. Just a riot of color that evokes nothing and feels flat. The wonder and majesty of Oz this ain't. Even the costumes look cheap and ill-considered.

And look, I get it. This is a movie adaptation, of a stage adaptation, of a book that's basically Wizard of Oz AU fanfiction. They're going to do their own think. But Wicked (The Musical) already sanded off so many of the rough edges of Wicked (The Book) and it looks like this thing is gonna continue in that vein.

But at a certain point when you pour enough water into your wine, you're just drinking water, and it really feels like we've passed that point.

This is an enormously big-budget musical that seems almost ashamed its a musical; you wouldn't know this is musical theater from the trailer, at any rate. That's not a great sign. Neither is the fact that they appear to be doing some sort of "Elphaba's magical power is driven by her being overly emotional and out of control," which is a questionable choice to make when you've cast a black woman in the role.

Actually, let's talk about casting.

Your leads are WAY TOO FUCKING OLD. I know that doesn't make a difference in a stage production. This is not a stage production. Ariana Grande is 30; Cynthia Erivo is thirty-seven. These people are not college freshmen, and expecting us to believe they are is insulting.

Yes, I'm also aware there's a long tradition of expecting us to believe people in their mid-twenties are high school students. There are limits and this pushes past them. The costuming and makeup departments are working hard, but the amount of makeup they're having to cake on Grande and Erivo in order to make them look like fresh-faced youngsters is extremely off-putting. We're not sitting a hundred feet away in a theater, the camera is doing close-ups a lot. Black Elphaba is an excellent choice, but you could have found a much, much younger actress for it.

They also made some... weird choices for diversification of the cast. Not in a "it is historically inaccurate for these people not to be white" kind of a way, but in a "you're sort of undercutting your own themes" kind of a way.

Wicked (The Book) is very explicitly about white supremacy, imperialism, and class. So is every other book in the Wicked Years, when they aren't also about gender fuckery. The musical cuts a lot of that away, but its still there. The Gillikinese (Glinda the Goods specific ethnic group in the context of Oz) are an explicit expression of this. They're economically, culturally, industrially, and socially dominant, and virulently racist against all of Oz's other ethnic groups (the Munchkins, the Animals, the Quadlings, the "Winkies") for whom they have a charming variety of racial slurs and race legislation towards.

Casting a white British person as Fiyero Tigelaar is absurd in this context. Fiyero's whole deal is that he's from a racially disfavored group and is treated pretty shitty because of it! Yes, I am AWARE the role on-state was originated by a white dude. This ain't the play.

Similarly, casting someone who isn't so white they practically glow in the dark as Madame Morrible is kind of a misstep. Madame Morrible is the enforcer of the Wizard's race policy.

And so I have to question... what the hell are they padding this out with?

The stage play is two hours and 45 minutes long. That would translate to the screen fairly handily, on the long side but about where you'd expect a big epic to be these days.

Only they're doing this as TWO movies, like Dune did. Is doing.

As this is likely to be marketed as a family film (I'm expecting a PG rating) they might just be making two ninety-minute films so that parents aren't off-put by the idea of their kids squirming in chairs for three hours. But given that the director and writers have spoken repeatedly about how this story was just "too big" to be contained in a single film, and that they're planning to add a whole bunch of stuff, that seems unlikely. I have a hard time seeing both movies clock in at a runtime of under four hours.

So what are you going to do here?

I had been hoping at first that they were going to re-add in a bunch of the themes and plot points from the novel. And maybe they are? But I sense that they're being timid here. That they're gonna pull their punches and make this a very straightforward, very paint-by-numbers story about a generically evil tyrant with the race and class stuff shoved way, way, way into the background. For that matter I expect them to dial the queerness back as well, which would be awful because my god is Wicked queer.

I dunno. This just seems like a lot of red flags.

[c0smiccom3t]

Dimension Dyfenders Update!! (9/20/23)

HEY, HEY, it's September! You know what that means! (read the above)

Hello D.D fandom, hello followers, mutuals, friends and hello people who curiously stumbled upon this post. You all know who i am, but for those who don't, let me introduce myself. My name's Comet. I'm the co-creator and main artist in the indie webcomic series Dimension Dyfenders! As of right now, i'm attending art school and trying my best to work more on the webcomic while also attending on my studies and get better grades. Now, you might ask, "Comet, what's going on with this series now?", "Why haven't been there more pocket adventures minisode 1 parts lately?" Well, i got the answers right here! First of all, let's start with the most obvious one... The Pocket Adventures situation.

Now, Pocket Adventures hasnt been online as of late, no next parts were being published, and im very sorry for that. The cause for it is the loss of motivation i had, which made me not work on it for a long while. Even when making new panels i feel extremely tired. Feeling like i should do something else (heck, i feel insecure about its panels when i draw them!) But fret not, that doesn't mean Pocket Adventures is getting cancelled. We still have loads of plans on the table and we can't wait to roll them out. But for now, we're taking a break due to IRL situations for example, art school. We, the team, have lives outside of making d.d content. We need to get our degrees and, well, try to survive life. But no worries, because I got plans to get back on D.D P.A Minisode 1 and finish it completely once winter break hits. As long as my motivation gets out of its hibernation phase. But still, i can't wait for you all to see the conclusion to minisode 1. (I just hope you dont mind if i jump right into the 'new designs' in the next pages)

Speaking of minisodes, I've been thinking of releasing minisodes only once a year than every saturday. Though this decision is not final yet. I don't want clout, in fact, i just wanna do what I love. Create stories and comics for everybody to enjoy. But if you guys would love for a minisode to release once a year or once in 3 months, let me know your opinions! Your criticism helps this series, especially its production, grow better!

Now, for the second and final question you may have asked… Thing is, Nothing has changed! But well, if you know me on my social media for my recent Crash Bandicoot fanart, then you might notice that Crash 4: It's About Time, especially it's artbook (and concept art by Nicola Saviori)... Has affected my artstyle, DRASTICALLY. So. The characters, of course, have went through some changes. I'd like to call this new artstyle... "The TFB Effect". As a matter of fact, Dimension Dyfenders (both its miniseries and full series) is going to have a brand new, more cartoony, zanier than ever artstyle! Don't believe me? See for yourselves. Starting with the main ones!

I decided to add a little bit of the good ol' Squash and Stretch to the characters to make them stand out more in the next comics. So of course, some of the colors have changed, especially designs and bodytypes. Oh, and not just that, our heroes have some new stuff, too! For example: Knockout's Dyfender Element is now refered as "Quantum Strenght", Paintdrop's is called "Cosmic Creativity" and Speedrunner's is called "Light Speed". Neat upgrades, eh? (Still, criticism is accepted.) Anyway, notice that in the first picture above there's something that says: "Dyfender Mode", right? Well, if you see that, that's because we are introducing something brand new to our heroes. Called: Omni-modes.

Now, "what are Omni-modes?", you may ask? Well, Omni-modes are modes that are set on the Dyfenders' Dy-watches, you may see that the Omni-Modes are, of course, the Dyfenders' alternate hero forms, to help them take on a mission in a different, more suitable form. When the day needs to be saved during night time (and rarely past bedtime), they activate Night Mode. For sunny beach days but still wanting to make sure nobody figures out their secret identities, Acqua Mode will be at their service. There are tons of different Omni-Modes to be shown (Especially, Pride mode, which was shown on this year's pride post.) So, yeah. Omni-modes will be shown in both the miniseries AND the full series!

Oh! And refering to characters, we can't forget about our main bad guys! Oh, you know, the Dajo-Crew? They got a bit of a make over to fit to the current artstyle! (ft. the updated height chart):

Now that we got that out of the way. let's just head over what will the future of the series look like as of right now. Starting off with the full series and pocket adventures. As said before, Dimension Dyfenders' artstyle changed. But that doesn't mean everything changed, things may be different (the more cartoony artstyle and the sillier tone), but nothing about the series has changed! And that means..

MORE POCKET ADVENTURES IS HAPPENING, THAT'S RIGHT! MORE D.D CONTENT COMING THIS WAY!

As for right now, D.D Minisode 1 may still be in development as we speak, but one thing that's completed right now is the script! Now that its finally finished, all thats left, is the panel and comic page-making (hopefully you wont mind the sudden character design changes, though.)! But in the meantime! We got some sneak peaks for not just one of the panels from the next minisode 1 pages, but also a never-seen before panel from the next minisodes of pocket adventures! (notice: some of these are not final and may change in the final product.)

That's not all! this franchise has got some new stuff coming in during it's run. We got so many plans, but this is the only thing we can show about said plans:

As you can see, you're gonna see some new characters in pocket adventures. While in the full series, you'll get some new characters too. Except... New baddies will be only in the full series, while in the miniseries then later in the animated series... You'll get to meet some new allies! So, keep your eyes peeled for them! And we hope you like them as much as we do.

Now, D.D has never shown a sign of stopping, even during hiatuses, so im happy to announce that more Pocket Adventures will be on their way after Minisode 1 has completed production! We're thinking of putting the upload dates on hold (which means, minisode 2 is delayed until further notice, sorry guys.). So please be patient when waiting for new minisodes.

And speaking of patience... I think I got a little something to keep you guys busy with while you wait... Introducing…

DIMENSION DYFENDERS TOONIES!

Now, you may be wondering: "What is THIS?" D.D.T (Dimension Dyfenders Toonies for long), is a brand new miniseries of comic strips that comes out during the weekends. (Starting in October, the end of september, or during the holiday season! No promises, though.) It's a little something i can make up while you guys wait for the next Pocket Adventures Minisodes. Oh yeah, here's one of the cover for it, too! It's not much, but i know you guys would go NUTS for it:

This will be about how the Dyfenders handle their superhero and school lives in everyday situations. (No worries, the action isn't gone. There might be some strips about school, but there will be more strips about their superhero lives, guarantee!). It's also about what The Dajo-Crew does when they aren't invading dimensions, get into some shenanigans at the castle and also when they plot evil schemes. some strips will be either original with a new short story or a recreation of old strips from phase 1 (not a final decision of course, but you can tell us if you like this idea)! One thing to point out is that some of the strips might take place before some minisodes, now thats another thing to notice, right? And that's the only "spoiler" I can give. So, sorry, no more! OH! And for any of you voice actors reading this who are like: "Wow, i wonder when this series will get a comic dub / animated series. If i'm lucky enough i might be able to voice act for it!" … Boy, do we have a treat for you all. Which will be posted in a few hours. both on bird app, bluesky, insta and on here!  The only thing I have to announce is that during the d.d stuff's production and during art school, i'm not gonna be online on social media. (until during normal/long weekends and festive days.), but no worries, the series is still alive and kicking, even when there aren't posts about it for a few months! Though, in some days, i'll be able to make and share some art for it! You're all in for a wild ride for these months and for 2024! Oh, and about Dajo's account. I'm planning to bring it back. But, Dajo is currently busy conquering Dimensions, but I can assure he hasn't abandoned Sinstagram completely. You'll see more of his influencer side, too. Both in his Sinstagram and in the upcoming strips! (And perhaps in some mini– OOPS! TOO MUCH!) That's all for now! Thank you all for your support on the series, don't forget to share your fan creations of the series in DMs or tag me and the team in your masterpieces, share it with your family and friends, subscribe to the series on Comicfury, and follow me on Tumblr, bluesky, bird app and Instagram if you wish to support the project even outside of comicfury! Once again, thank you all in this slowly-growing small fandom for all of your support, and i hope you're all excited for what's to come! If you have any questions, please drop them on my tumblr askbox, Which i'll be able to answer during the weekends. That's all, back to the offline study and sleep abyss for me. GOODBYE!