When you're writing an essay and the Tumblr app reloads and deletes half of it so now it's never getting done because your motivation is completely shot and you already spent an hours worth of spoons you didn't have on it :)
It's incredibly upsetting and exhausting
This has happened to my last three essays. at this point my writing motivation is shot. I can't do it anymore. Idk when I'll get back to writing essays but writing a bunch of stuff only for it to disappear genuinely takes so much outta me.
individual stills of miguel Scampering on all fours and showing off his more distinct individual movement style (that he has because of his spider-man's Similar-but-still-distinctly-Weird-and-unique powers as compared to the more-graceful Others) so that i don't have 2 keep rewinding the clip(s) to see it.
im REALLY excited to see him scuttling and skittering all over the place in the film just like he does in the comics-- and, like, seriously, Miguel Specifically being just. made Massive for some reason in his atsv design will never NOT be funny to me hes SO freakin Bouncy why did they Do That.
don't be Weird on my post or i'll kill you for real
after crying for a week over my initial Halloween costume I went into my wardrobe to find anything I could as a back up/last minute costume. it safe to say I own Serena from MTV's downtown's closet :D!
So those graphic novel pages huh? Seems I posted my cover post at just the right time because literally minutes after I was informed the preview pages came out and uh. This is Buddy and Norman!
Oh dear... I'll put the full graphic novel pages down below but I have so much to say on how awful this is it'll need several posts. However, right now I want to mostly talk about representation and briefly touch on why it's so damn important + inform others about the current shit Mike and Meatly are saying about the books n such.
Now note: All the things I'm saying below are based on my personal experience, maybe some people don't care about seeing the representation of their identities in the media they consume. Maybe some will think I'm merely being dramatic and I might be but I'm not lying when I say I personally believe being represented and seen in the media you consume can be one of the most wonderful feelings in the world.
Look I'm not here to argue with people who think that Norman in particular was never meant to be a person of color, I would argue he is very coded but the points I'm making here are not about how Norman particularly had to be black. The point I want to make is the lack of diversity in our cast in general and how Norman's design has heavily dwindled it considering most people [including myself] rightfully assumed he was at least one of three black characters in our cast. Not according to this though and looking at the the rest of the pages our chances of seeing any kind of decent diverse character designs dwindle more.
So firstly... Buddy a character who has been said to experience discrimination for being Jewish, lacks any kind of ethnic features at all. That's... Cool but yeah I think this shows a rather grim future for the character designs as a whole.
Also, Norman... As I mentioned he was largely assumed to be black due to his southern dialect, his voice, and other factors. But nope, he's a generic white guy. With... Gross looking hair tbh...
Sadly this is not the first time the topic of poor representation has come up concerning Bendy either.
[note how he disregarded the other mentioned minorities and specifically cites LGBTQ+ characters]
This sucks as a response but sadly considering Mike's recent behavior it seems to fall in line with the Bendy team's general lack of care towards representing anyone who isn't straight and white.
So how did Mike respond to all of this? Well...
TDLR - "Who cares if the Graphic Novel we're selling to our fans for full price sucks, we now no longer consider the books canon."
This is horrible, I know Mike and Meatly are only really in this for the money, the fact BATIM is in the state that it is proved that, but they really couldn't have been less obvious about it?
So basically when it benefited them, AKA when it meant people would have to buy the books to understand important lore like Boris' identity... [the character you spend all of chapter 4 trying to rescue] They were considered canon... At least the author sure thought so.
Hell even in the tweet Meatly made here he doesn't say the books aren't canon, he just says they're not needed to understand Bendy's world. Now Mike is using that as a shield instead of doing the right thing and saying "You're right, the poc in our fanbase deserve better we'll have it fixed right away!" Like most reasonable people would considering how his studio has literally been accused of bigotry, poor rep, and general lack of diversity before. Why risk making more people avoid this franchise?
Also just... Imagine how insulting it would be to be an author who helps flesh out so much of this world and gives its characters depth like NONE of the games have managed to do, filling in plot holes, creating a timeline for events, etc... Then because they couldn't bother to change the graphic novel for ur story to be better they instead throw out all ur writing and declare it non-canon.
If I were her to put it bluntly I'd feel insulted and horrible. Why make her do all the work of making sure her works align with the timeline and game's canon if they're not part of it?
I can't speak for her obviously but Meatly and Mike know of her account, so speaking out against this could very much risk her being fired or at least not allowed to work on Bendy anymore... So I would take all her tweets on this situation with a grain of salt. She very much is not in a position where she could be honest if she was against this.
So with all that history now, the question I'm sure many are wondering is... Why does this even matter? Who cares how diverse the characters are when it doesn't affect the story?
Well for one thing, if you think like that consider having more empathy for your fellow human beings but also it does affect the story. One of DCTL's themes is about the bigotry of the period it is set in.
Now the Bendy team has managed to make the discussion of this book centering around their bigotry which is ironic in a way I almost find funny... Though this entire thing is just a bit too hurtful and upsetting to find any humor in, at least for me...
But another thing is representation can bring people such joy when it's done with care. It really shouldn't be understated how far it can go to make people feel more comfortable in their own sense of self to have a franchise choose to represent them and their experiences. I know this from personal experience.
Now if you've been following me for a while, you know I'm a big fan of Transformers. I no longer engage with it much due to baggage from the fandom's awful treatment of me, but before I left I remember being able to witness the release of Transformers: Earthspark first few episodes.
These introduced the Maltos the family who meets the Transformers and serve as our protagonists and guess what?
It's a family of Filipinos!
Now look I'm not Filipino, but I am half Mexican and I have a lot of love for that part of me. So seeing the representation of any Spanish culture in this franchise I loved made me so happy! I remember just watching the first episode I was happily telling my partner how fun it was to see people like me and my family in a world I love!!
But it didn't end with the Maltos in fact... There was another character who spoke to me, their name was Nightshade. Their pronouns are They/Them and they spoke about it on the show! Not just mentioning it and moving on but actually sitting down to speak about their experiences...
This clip in particular really turned them into an absolute favorite among fans and well... I'll let you see it for yourself.
This scene... Fills me with a joy I cannot describe. It is the creators of a franchise I love telling me they see people like me and find the stories of people like me important enough to include in this series. There really is nothing like being able to say there are Non-Binary characters in a franchise I have so much love for. I was far from the only one too.
This is amazing, this is wonderful, this clip and character were moving to so so many people and...
This is a joy the Bendy creators have no interest in giving their audience. They don't care how you feel as a queer and/or black person, which... Hurts...
I... Discovered I was trans while in the Bendy community... It was where I learned the word Non-Binary and started using it for myself. To me Bendy will always have that connection... But the devs themselves seem to hate the idea of being forced to actually represent that in their games... And I still haven't really gotten over that pain or betrayal if I'm being honest.
So...
With Norman now being portrayed as white here, we are down to two black characters. Thomas [who Meatly has claimed is white in the past] based on a vague conversation with Sammy in DCTL they could easily ignore... And Jacob.... A book exclusive character which according to Mike means he is non-canon.
If we don't count Thomas' vague talk with Sammy about disrespect as confirmation he's black [which the devs don't seem to think so] then we have one black character in all of Bendy... And he recently got retconned into non-existence. Great.
Look... The Bendy fanbase has always been full of wonderfully diverse designs for the staff and even more diverse people creating them. Bendy's fandom was built with the work of queer people from all kinds of places.
If the Bendy team continues to show how little they care for anyone who isn't straight or white... I wonder who they are counting on to buy this book or in general financially support their franchise?
I know right now, I am furious, I am hurt and I most certainly don't feel like buying a book that's currently just a massive fuck you to the fans and I hope I've expressed why I feel this way in an easy-to-understand way here...
Either way, I will not be forgetting this anytime soon and I hope the fanbase does the same. Maybe just maybe, if there's enough backlash to this series of horrible decisions they'll learn better.
Right now, it's kinda of our only hope for a better future, and if you know any poc who are into Bendy right now... Maybe consider making sure they're feeling okay.
I know from experience how much this sort of thing hurts, to have the creators of a world you love straight up tell you they don't intend to fix the fact no one in their stories represents your identity or life...
What I'm trying to say is...
This is a really low point for Bendy and its fans... Even more for the poc who have to witness such ignorant and careless attitudes from Mike and Meatly towards their feelings.
Please don't forget them when you discuss these tweets or this situation. That's exactly what Mike and Meatly want right now.
For them to be unrepresented and therefore... Unheard.
⊹ .+ Tag Game Rules: Shuffle your on repeat playlist and post the first 10 tracks, then tag 10 people. ᅠ ⊹ .+
Take Me Back To Eden - Sleep Token
Divine Service - Lies of P OST
Bones - Equinox
Turncoat - Matthew Mayfield
Suffer - Hurts
Magdalene - Akira Yamaoka
Roxanne - Sting
Wing of Hypocrisy - Lies of P OST
Hail the Nightmare - Bloodborne OST
Yawning Grave - Lord Huron
ᅠ ⊹ .+ tagged by: @hymntosappho + @aligom-pink-coffin ✨ Thank you both! I love lil dash games like these omg
ᅠ ⊹ .+ tagging: @harena-tigris, @ghostlyanon, @00x7, @bornetoblood, @butchladymaria, @galaxirin, @treeshrine, @karnaca78, @dulaman-na-farraige ᅠ✨
I'm just going to say that I agree 120% with what was said about empathy and respect for the new cultures that are gonna be add to the server. But I think it's also good to clarify that this goes both ways. We are all going to be exposed to new things and we have to let our guard down a little to try to understand each other.
It always comes down to empathy and respect. Members and communities that are currently involved with the server can screw up without even realizing it, just as new members can screw up. We are humans. The thing is to take a deep breath and, as long as there is no bad intention behind it, talk about things like adults. With patience and empathy.
something something screwtio something something the woes and wonders of a human-robot relationship something something learning from each other as equals something something affection displayed by mental connection sometjing something time passing and the memory of one living on in the other eternally idk idk
Not sure if this is where you want your asks to be sent or not, I'm new to your blog so sorry if this is the wrong place
There is another instruction for Wally that I haven't seen you talk about and I want to know your thoughts! Back in november, before the responses, the secret URLs (such as woxyve) had the word "delete" added to the end (ex: woxyvedelete) implying that they wanted Wally to delete the page. After this most recent update it changed again and now says nodelete meaning that Wally refused to do that task. Thoughts?
where else would asks be sent if not the Askbox! inbox! both!
i actually wasn't aware of this until a few days ago, when i saw a post pointing it out - i had never gone directly back to those pages. which serves me right! i'm gonna be double checking Everything from now on lmao
but my fucking GOD is it interesting. thus far Wally has been... fairly cooperative. he's had a moment here and there, such as closing the guest book and losing his patience a lil, but he does his best with the rest! especially with requests! so for him to straight up go "lmao nah" when asked to delete something...
characterization-wise, i think it's very telling. as of now, Wally has been commonly portrayed as a bit of a doormat - getting talked over, sitting off to the side, being a bit of a background character - in in-Home media. less so in his whrp/qa/You interactions, but he's still widely agreeable & willing. but him refusing to delete the urls gives major points to him Having A Spine. he's holding his ground. he knows what he's doing. he's not going to let the whrp shut him up. there's a Thought Process / Plan / Purpose being shown here, or at least hinted at. there's a sense of.... Control. of "this is the way we're doing things, this is what i'm saying and you're going to sit down and listen"
it's just... such a shift from the Wally we see in his interactions with the neighbors. which again, lends credence to there being a time discrepancy, with whrp Wally being older and more "experienced" while past Wally is still figuring his shit [being alive] out <3
story-wise it adds some Delightful friction. like obviously there's already tension, what with the staff only page, "Let Me In", the mysterious black stuff, the guest book closing, and the whrp/qa being disturbed by it all. but Wally outright refusing to delete things is a Different sort of conflict. it's more... direct. which makes sense! his interactions with the whrp/qa are becoming more personal, too. but it lends to the feeling of a push-pull. as the whrp/qa investigates Wally and starts treating him like the person he is instead of a long-lost character, they're probably gonna clash (a lot) despite the apparent impulse to pursue Welcome Home. currently, Wally doesn't seem big on compromising. if he doesn't know what to do, it looks like he simply Won't or he'll do his own thing and be like "shrug". if he doesn't want to do something, it also looks like he simply Will Not.
of course, there's the strong possibility that the whrp Were Not Serious about it. the 'delete' command might have them testing the waters, poking the bear, etc. but then were they testing to see if Wally is there, or were they testing his level of compliance? both? a secret third option?
and if they Were serious about it... why? what is it about the marked urls that made the whrp go "get that outta here"? and why couldn't they delete it themselves? i mean, obviously they can't delete anything Wally adds, otherwise the extra stuff he's added probably wouldn't be there (unless the impulse / curiosity driving them is too strong to delete anything added). but there's still a why about it. what changed so fundamentally in the site's code - or laws of physics/reality - that made it impossible to alter Wally's additions?
it's just. i feel that there are a lot of implications in such a small interaction. it shows more than one would expect.
dennis is an angry character btw im sorry but he is full of rage but that rage is not exclusive his anger does not negate sadness and fragility and insecurities in fact they work together and dtamhd was one of the first times where his anger was not used as a joke via a surface level rage explosion from him but instead explored the fragility of his anger. the way he keeps reassuring the workers he encounters (and himself) that he's not mad. when he tells daisy he's not mad but he is a little bit upset. dennis is angry and that anger is what makes him so fragile. he was upset and it manifested as rage bc he doesnt know what to do with his own sadness
i should be on game changer. i had the "yes or no" game completely solidified by question 5. i knew what was up by question 3 but knew it completely by 5. i feel godly.
Yea I admit it, I am extremely jealous of rich people, especially those who were born rich. Who are able to follow their passions and not worry about money because their parents bought them a car and a penthouse apartment in LA and they can stream on twitch and get thousands of followers cause they have top of the line equipment and studio set up and the TIME that is essential to creating and keeping a community engaged. It's very rare that a person who makes enough money to support themselves on twitch started out poor. I'm not saying it doesn't happen, but being able to stay home and stream all day and afford expensive equipment (including a gaming pc or laptop that can handle streaming video, let alone streaming both video and a graphics heavy game) will always have a HUGE advantage over someone who has to work all day for a living. And don't get me started on vtubers who drop 5k+ on a model and branding kit and instantly get hundreds of thousands of followers.
I wish I could stream more and do more streams oriented towards environmental science and conservation but my pc keeps breaking and most of my spoons go towards my job. I don't even really want to be a huge streamer? I just want enough people to hang out with so I'm not lonely while playing farming games
gives me a laugh when my manager observes how little I seem like I cared while I was in like a depressive mood and then she asks for the Old me I guess like when i cared except this Is a dead end job and I never cared and in fact I want to stop caring still but like I guess it hurts that like there is obviously something wrong with me and I am barely functioning as it is . And I guess that I'm being told that I should just keep a happier face and I try very hard to do this yet still mess up and am generally miserable .
does anyone know where i could buy some short-sleeve button-up shirts with neat patterns that aren't too costly? i'd love to add some to my wardrobe considering i only have one