#im also on my period could that have anything to do with it | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

queenofthedamnnile · 7 months

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Every time I drink I lowkey wish I hadn't the next day. Not in a "omg what stupid shit did I do" way cause I don't even get stupid drunk just in a "good God when will these poisoning effects subside" way

#my head hurts so fucking bad #and i was hydrated!#i drank at least 32 oz of water #and a bottle of Gatorade #but i still woke up with a splitting headache #and my tummy is all upset #and my tummy is always upset after drinking #the headache is new though #does that mean im getting old #im also on my period could that have anything to do with it #cause i feel like i really didnt drink tjst much comparatively #but i physically feel like shit

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quietwingsinthesky · 5 months

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i really do think the desire to paint ten as unambiguously The Worst™️ when it comes to his relationship with martha is out of this desire to uncomplicate their relationship. to decouple them as friends and people who profoundly impacted each other’s lives. it’s just an easier narrative to swallow: that ten was Awful to her and then martha kicked him to the curb when she realized she was too good for him. easier, maybe, then dealing with the troubles of unrequited affection don’t have to be anyone’s fault, or that ten shut martha out in a lot of ways but let her in in others that he wouldn’t let any other companion near, or that they were still friends, they still wanted to see each other and be around each other, even though it was messy and sometimes hurt. you know?

#sometimes the doctor is shitty. this is not news we know this. this is part of the package. its what makes their relationships with their #companions so interesting so important.#like. how do i put this. i see posts sometimes about how ten was ‘leading martha on’ implying that he was taking advantage of her feelings #to keep her around. and. okay. so. putting aside how that’s a weird thing to say about anyone period.#its also just. from my viewing experience. not true?#the doctor is just sort of Like That. he’s too intense he’s too quick to grasp for emotional intimacy he’s too messy.#but he’s not leading her on. he really is just Like That.#like i feel by getting caught up in the fact that martha is hurt by being compared to rose and is hurt by the fact that the doctor can’t or #won’t return her feelings. and like. yeah. of course that hurts.#but in being caught up in that. i think what im saying is that it feels like people sometimes forget that he’s. not required to do that.#like just because she has feelings for him doesn’t mean he needs to get over himself and return them or else he’s using her. that’s. that’s #not how relationships work. people can have romantic feelings and still be friends and not have anything come of it and that’s not a #terrible outcome. thats just how friendships are sometimes.#thats the core of it to me. they’re friends. the way people post about ten & martha sometimes i wonder if everyone’s forgotten that they #are friends. that they last parted as friends. that martha doesn’t hate him or secretely resent him for how he treated her.#like. she’s got complicated feelings about the whole thing. but they didn’t stop being friends.#i tell you what: if the doctor was in trouble and called for help. you could be damn certain that martha jones would be one of the first #people to answer. that’s what i know.#doctor who #the doctor #tenth doctor #martha jones

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puppyeared · 10 months

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its so hard to watch time pass when things like careers and assignments exist. what do you mean im supposed to take that seriously

#I have an assignment that was due a week ago and I really really dont want to do it. I have to but i dont want to #im probably making it worse because my brain has built a wall around it so now i can’t do literally anything else until thats done. but #because I don’t want to do it I’m just kinda stuck. turns out this is what they meant when they said emotional regulation is part of #exec dysfunction.. I’ll have a thought like if I get a little bit of it done now i can get it over with. I can just submit something #and then not even 5 minutes later itll be like ugh but I have to draw all the assets out. I have to write things and make spreads ugh #and its just flopping between those two things. i hate it when ppl are like well how much time do you need to work on one thing #because BOY id love to know too. I’d love to know exactly when my brain wants to cooperate with me and work around that but I cant #even my period can’t decide when it wants to punch me in the stomach. which is kinda funny in the grand scheme of things but still #its so weird im just lying on my bed thinking abt all this like damn.. the time will pass anyways no matter what I decide to do.. damn….#if I submit that assignment now and take the L I literally won’t die. it’ll just be a deduction on an assignment nobody will ask me about #I know this but I’m still stressing myself about it so my thoughts aren’t really connecting to my body. weird #maybe its because Im having a hard time looking forward to things. theres definitely a lot I should be living for but I don’t really feel #a strong attachment to it I guess? it’s been like this for a while with holidays and meeting with friends so I just don’t #I kinda figured its because im pretty passionless and its more like passing interest. but it’s not very fun when it feels like I’m going to #be living distraction to distraction for the next 70 years or so lol #idk it kind of feels like slowly bleeding out. which is funny because I actually did experience blood loss this week #had a 30 minute nosebleed and literally could not stand. also it felt like someone was pinching the back of my brain which was interesting #yapping #does this count as vent #vent #Ive just been making an oc carrd and contemplate changing my blog header for the past 3 days honestly

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butterflieswhisper · 2 months

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looping echidna beastlife gif from trying to figure out toonboom

#based loosely off the bird who keeps taunting my cats through the window. brown headed cowbird who will sit there #and flap it's wings and yell until the cats show up and then it starts pecking at the window and jumping back and forth in front of them #weird bird.#it's done this for like two years now i think #anyways. sound it makes when it fluffs up is vaguely similar to echidnas birdsong soundboard noise thing. so. yeag #whisp whispers #my art #ALSO. ANIMATION PRECOLLEGE IS SO AWESOME. IM SO. AHRHRHNFMDM GET ME OUT OF HIGHSCHOOL PRLESDRRRE GIVE ME AN ART TEACJER WHO CARES ABOUT ART #it's so awesome here. toonboom access!!!! this is so awesome. guys toonboom is so awesome. not to turn a hobby into a job but like i was #genuinely kind of sad when i didn't get to go to school over the weekend it's so awesome here. who was going to tell me college doesn't suck #miserably all the time. like it's a precollege but still this is so ??? so much better than anything i've done in the past 8 years #<-except for fine crafts one i miss u fine crafts ...... not even a fine arts credit. but it was a nice class #anyways point being. hm. maybe i could animate for a job. i used to think about it but hs art magnet is so bad guys it's so bad .and i #was like hm this sucks actually. also like worst period of my life but that's unrelated . but this is so. nice? and im DOING things and i #feel like i'm learning??? god i hope dual enrollment goes well maybe i will be able to make it through college...#im so. this is so awesome. precollege animation 2-week intensive thing i love you i love you i love you #BTW GUYS DID YOU KNOW ALL AUTODESK PRODUCTS ARE FREE AS LONG AS UR IN ANY SCHOOLING. MAYA. FOR FREE. FOR AS LONG AS ENROLLED IN ANY SCHOOL #AND THEN SOME !!! i don't even like 3d modeling that much but. maya for free??? that's awesome. that's awesome!! anyways #rambling. i think i missed all normal tags. uhhhhhhhhh #beastlife #<-oh no i only missed that one. awesome. guys i love it here this is so. arbrnsnnm i love you figure drawing. i'm having fun!#with charcoal!!!!! i thought i hated charcoal but this is like !!!!! so aweosme ?????? i'm #this is so awesome. this is so awesome. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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knightelf · 21 days

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maybe i do need to go to therapy bc its probably not good that ive been living on autopilot and the last 7 years went by so fast but also bc i was deliberatly Wanting the time to go by to put as much space between me and the events of 2017-2020 as possible all while somewhat knowing my young adulthood was slipping me by and now both my teenage years and my early 20s are gone and i still feel like my 19th birthday was yesterday yeesh!!

#i do feel like im out of time completely and its kind of.making me insane bc its not fair lol #life could be worse! but it couldve been a lot better too #like on one hand i think i had a normal reaction to exceptionally traumatic shit happening to me with no support system.#and everything that happened was caused by shit out of my control and i Know that bc i spent my teen years specifically working hard to Be #in control #like i did make the choice to give up sure. but that was when absolutely every effort had been exhausted #and theres only so much a human being can take especially when i was so young #but on the other hand!! even when i found a support system and things are better now than they were #i still feel like im trapped perpetually in this Waiting period #waiting for life to begin Waiting for an OPPORTUNITY to make my life begin already #and no effort on my part yields anything so i have no choice but to WAIT #but im TIRED. of waiting #im sick of seeing videos of people way younger than me making art ive always dreamed id have made by now #theres also this invisable wall i have always had built around me that is Impenetrable and i keep hitting it #and its gotta be me but it really feels like the universe has some unseeable chains on me which aounds so stupid #but im not allowed to get passed it #im way past the point of even being capable of showing the agony it causes me now like its just a dull joke #ANYWAY the fact ive typed all this makes me think ok. yeah maybe it is time to talk to someone LOL #carry on im fine this happens to me all the time. helps to get it written out at least

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twinksintrees · 2 months

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what if i never get to live the life i want

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angelstrawbabie420 · 3 months

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it’s so weird i’ve been a loner my whole life i need alone time or i will go crazy even if it’s people i love. i had zero problem growing away from people during covid like if anything that specific part of it was a relief to me. but lately i’ve felt this loneliness i never ever have before and it is actually tearing me apart

#also i have destroyed so many relationships/friendships bc my mental health got so bad when my parents started having health issues #like i just could not maintain ANYTHING during that period of time i was so traumatized and exhausted truly the worst period of my life #now that im starting to come out of it a little it’s like i’m just now noticing the giant fucking gaping hole of having nothing #i mean irl ofc i love my online friends but it’s no replacement for irl relationships #i want to crawl out of my skin #but the thought of trying to rekindle friendships or make new ones. especially when im still very much not doing Good. is almost equally as #bad as just being alone.#slamming the ‘go back’ button so hard it cracks i think i wld rather be overstimmed than this

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bunnihearted · 4 months

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