#im contemplating turning this into a mini-series

[fatuismooches]

Can be read as a continuation of this. Fragile reader's journey to understand all the segments continues as this time they set their eyes on none other than Webttore, who is referred to as 02 in this fic. I miss Webby, everyone. Overall, just lots of fluff.

After a few centuries-long coma, when you woke up, the hardest thing to process wasn’t that fact. It wasn’t the fact your lover, who now went by “Dottore” instead of “Zandik” was now a powerful Harbinger. It wasn’t the fact you had to deal with this illness for who knows how long (actually, this was quite hard to process, but you tried your best not to dwell on it.) Rather, it was the fact that Dottore now had copies of himself running around. And if you were to properly adjust to your new life, you absolutely had to make room for them. But that was easier said than done.

They were all Zandik, but at the same time, they felt like strangers to you. They were familiarly enigmatic as you had remembered the original one, but you weren’t sure if you were good enough to puzzle each of them out all over again… However, pursuing Zandik as a student meant that you certainly were a persistent soul, so you would try!

You had already found company in another segment, 24 to be exact. At first, you were unsurprisingly intimidated by him, with his imposing nature and stern voice. However, with a bit of courage, you were able to get to know him a bit more, outside of what you saw of him while he was working. It was a lovely experience, if you put aside how his words made your heart race, and his touch made your body ache for him.

Regardless, now that you had 24 down, it was time to broaden your horizons. It was time to put your newly found confidence to the test once again - which meant it was time for you to woo and get wooed by another one of Dottore’s segments. Which segment was it this time, one may ask? Well, it was none other than the one who donned that white and black mask, with a pink bowtie where that color too lurked in the insides of his coat, with a nature as equally as striking as his red eyes.

02 was his name. Once again, a very intriguing man. He was nothing like Prime or 24, making you quite interested in him. You still remember the few times you met him, it was nothing like the poised elegance 24 carried. He was rough and more outwardly eccentric, yet it was equally as alluring. You wanted to know more. And learn more you shall.

Unfortunately, you did not see much of him in the main lab, as he preferred to stay in his own one far more. So you would need to make the trip there. In fact, you were so prepared that you had walked to the area of his lab numerous times and came back so you wouldn’t get lost this time. However, in all honesty, you had no idea what you were even going to say or do, but you just hoped the situation would flow as smoothly as it did with 24. 

As you got closer to the doors of 02’s lab, your pace slowed and your heartbeat quicked as you realized the door was slightly ajar. This was a good chance to simply… observe the segment. Even though you previously had confidence, the idea of knocking on 02’s door made you anxious still. Carefully, you tip-toed and peeked into the room, biting your lip in anticipation.

It was a very large space, really spacious actually, and yet so much of it was filled with many things. There were numerous desks and tables that had a variety of parts and stacks of papers, not to mention there weren’t just Ruin Machines and the sort either. You could see some dissembled robots that you swore had glowing eyes. Strange. But interesting. Not to mention the size of some of them - you really don’t remember Ruin Guards being so large four hundred years ago… could perhaps these be ones 02 created himself? You were fascinated. Of course, you were no stranger to Zandik’s fascination with Khaenri’ahn machines. You often accompanied him on his unauthorized expeditions to examine them further back in the Akademiya.

Speaking of, 02 himself was standing in front of them, the height and size difference being laughable. His coat had been thrown over a chair, and he was simply wearing a vest with a white shirt, his sleeves rolled up with his gloves still on. Very attractive, you had to admit, but that was beside the point. You could see he was mumbling to himself, impatiently tapping the table next to him that had various tools on it, when his expression abruptly changed. A smile appeared on his face as he began to laugh and then mumble under his breath more excitedly. Perhaps he had a breakthrough? You wished to know what went through his mind.

Eagerly, you leaned forward to try and hear more but simultaneously forgot the situation you were in right now - pretty much spying on him. Unfortunately, you did not account for the uncomfortably loud groaning that came from the door when you only slightly pushed on it.

Oops. Why did these things always happen to you? There was truly no backing out now, from the way 02’s laughter immediately stopped as his red eyes glanced behind him, an irritated frown in place of his previous smile.

“Who-” 02 turned around to face the intruder who would be so stupid as to interrupt him, but his expression changed once again when he realized this was no ordinary intruder, it was you. “It is you. You are here.” There was not a grin or a frown on the segment’s face, rather, he seemed surprised yet intrigued at the same time. You sweated as he began to walk towards you.

“Yes, yes, it is me, [Name]. I am here,” you smiled, as you were forced to step out from behind your protection of the lab’s door. “I wanted to… visit you! It’s been a while since I’ve seen you, so you know, just wanted to check up on you and all,” you said with a rather awkward chuckle. Why did you always seem to have a loss of words during the beginning while talking to these men? 02 continued to look at you unmovingly with those lovely eyes of his. You cleared your throat as you took a few steps further into the room.

“Anyway, I must say that I am quite captivated by this… research of yours. I have never seen such a variety of machines before,” you stated genuinely, another smile etching its way onto your lips. It was then you realized that 02 had gotten closer to you, practically standing side by side merely looking at you, as if silently beckoning you to continue. That stare of his… it was quite cute.

“That one for example,” you pointed to the one the segment was previously preoccupied with, “it’s far larger than any machine I remember from back then. Is it-”

“RG-271.” You blinked at 02’s interruption. “That machine’s name,” he clarified. “Experiment RG-271.”

“I-I see. Is there any particular reason that- oh!” 

“Come.” Once again, before you could finish, the segment grabbed your arm and began to pull you to where he once stood with glee that could not be mistaken. You tried to ignore the slight heat creeping up your neck.

You hadn’t really given the segments the time of day yet, still clinging to Prime Dottore and being nervous around the clones, so to have you here so closely, of your own volition too, was an unexpected yet extremely welcomed course of events for 02. Oh, he knew you would never disappoint him, and of course, the segment was going to reap the rewards of this situation. 

“As I was saying, did you make some of these machines yourself?” 02 presented you with a wide grin, and you could see his pointy teeth on full display.

“Indeed I have. Simply experimenting on the old ones gets boring at times, and I too wish to surpass this ancient technology.” Before you could respond, he suddenly began to dig in a rather overcrowded box of many parts, some of which you recognized and some you didn’t. The collection of Chaos Oculus and Cores brought back fond memories, but these ones seem a bit different from usual. Enhanced by the segment, perhaps?

Regardless, before long he had gathered numerous ones and you had quickly realized that he was really going to explain to you in-depth about every part of this machine. Of course, you had no protest to this. For one, you were interested, and 02 looked so happy to go on and on about his research. Did he have no one else to tell this to? Actually, you don’t know why you asked that, of course he didn’t. (Thankfully, he had a stool for you to sit on, for your poor legs wouldn’t be able to hold you for the length of time he would talk.)

However, his animatedness quickly came and went as he then clicked his tongue in annoyance. “Though, I had yet to make them work. Unfortunately, they cannot move around as authentic machines can,” 02 said in disappointment. You couldn’t help but chuckle.

“I would not worry too much. You are smart enough to figure it out in due time.” The praise naturally left your lips because, well, you wholeheartedly believed it. 02 seemed to enjoy your compliment. It was amusing how you could read his feelings so easily despite that mask of his. Although you wondered if he was like this right now solely because of you.

“I shall.” You gently smiled at him again as he began to tidy up the mess he just made (although the end result certainly wasn’t anything to applaud.) But 02 wasn’t going to let you go yet.

“Would you like to see one in action?”

“You mean, see a Ruin Guard… move? In here? But isn’t that dangerous?” You were having flashbacks to the time you had to fend off a few because Zandik had decided to be a bit too eager in his research. 02 looked to be unconcerned at your worry.

“Worry not. I have control over them.” He took pride in your glittering admiring eyes, pulling you off your seat and leading you over to the other side of his lab. 02 then began to inspect the line of Ruin Guards against the wall, before then snapping his fingers.

“RG-134. Perfect.” You watched as he then began to tinker with it, not really knowing what was going on, but content to watch. But there was not much to watch as he finished quickly, and suddenly the machine stirred to life, the familiar blinking of yellow light signaling its awakening. Instinctively, you took a few steps back, heart racing from the machine that now loomed over you, but 02 pulled you closer.

“Do not be afraid. It will hinder you. Is this not a great opportunity?” You swallowed nervously, but you trusted him anyway. You took some careful steps toward the Ruin Guard, and it paid you no mind as you began to feel the machinery on the pads of your fingers.

“Huh… it really is docile. How did-” Your words were mostly drowned out by the creaking of the Ruin Guard’s leg lowering so that its hand was leveled with your body. You looked at 02 for help, but he motioned for you to go on.

“You want me to get on it? It’s going to be too high up!”

“Do you think I will let it drop you?” 02 seemed amused at your predicament. You pouted - it did seem really cool to have a ride on a Ruin Guard’s hand, but you were still a bit scared, so you placed your hand out.

“Come with me, then.” The segment’s eyes widened, probably not expecting your request, but he agreed with uncharacteristic silence. Thankfully, the machine’s palm was big enough to fit both of you, but your shoulder still brushed with 02’s. And then with some more creaks, you two were suddenly lifted into the air. You couldn’t help but quickly grab his arm as you watched the floor get more and more distant, but 02 seemed as if this didn’t bother him at all.

“Relax. You of all people should know how to enjoy this.” His words weren’t exactly comforting but they still served to help calm yourself. He was right - once you got rid of your fear, it was… super cool.

“Yes, you’re right. Thank you for this,” you giggled, as the machine slowly stomped around, careful to avoid any obstacles. 02 ignored how captivating you looked right now and looked away from the sight.

“I could also show you my Ruin Drakes if-” Before he could finish, the segment felt something soft brush against his cheek. Your lips to be exact, and before he could say or do anything, it ended.

“That does sound lovely, but…” you tried to stifle a yawn, “I am rather tired. I think I need a nap…” That stare you had gotten used to was back on you again, but you ignored it in order to quell your embarrassment. (You did not go for his lips because you were a bit shy to do that so early on, but also because that silly mask of his covered nearly half of his mouth. Good thing you were sitting on the side where his cheek was exposed…)

“I see. Then I suppose I will be seeing more of you, then?” For now, he had to resist the urge to sink his teeth into you after that little stunt of yours. Only for now, however.

“I would like that.”

“Excellent.” Soon enough, you were back on the ground again, but you did not want to return to your room.

“02, can I sleep here?”

“Here?” He cocked his head to the side. “I will not stop you, however, I cannot promise you it will be quiet.” You laughed at his response. It was different from 24’s strict one.

“Not to worry. I believe I will fall asleep anyway,” you hummed as you made yourself cozy on a rather uncomfortable couch (that was already very out of place here). “Mhm… good night, 02.” You did not receive any response, but you were happy.

… But then you remembered something.

“Wait! Wait, I forgot the most important question of all!” 02 turned back with a questioning look.

“Yes?” You passionately placed your hand on your chest as you then spoke.

“You need to show me those flying pointy beaming things of yours. I have never seen a weapon quite like it.”

“...”

From the day he came into this world as 02, to the day you named him to live and die as Beta, he will love you.

[urfavstargirl1]

the darkest night - part 1 of 3

summary: 12 year old reader searches the woods for best friend!eddie who hasn't been at school in weeks. After finding him and learning the true reason for his absence, she comforts him and by nightfall, their relationship takes a new turn

cw: best friends to lovers, hurt/comfort, angst, kissing, trauma (mentions of Eddie's dad going to jail), cursing, etc.,

a/n: absolutely had a lucky strike of inspiration from the song lyric shown below. I contemplated making this all one piece or a mini series and my impatient self wanted to already post it even tho im not done so mini series it is.

word count: 3.4k

The darkest night, never felt so bright with you by my side, 5 Seconds of Summer

May 19th, 1978

With every step you took, you could feel the dense earth soften beneath your feet. Stray leaves fell from the trees with every gust of that warm, almost summer, breeze. 

When you left your house, the sun shone brightly, beating down your back as you pedaled down the streets of your hometown, Hawkins, Indiana. 

After passing through your best friend Eddie’s neighborhood and later, his uncle’s trailer at the Forest Hills Trailer Park, searching for your beloved friend, you almost cursed him for practically sending you on some scavenger hunt and a tour of Hawkin’s greatest hits when he wasn’t at either place.

But you were determined to find him. And any sense of frustration at your prior luck seemed to dissipate as the shadow of the forest beyond the Hawkins National Lab protected you from that powerful celestial being of the sun above.

“Eddie,” you called out.

You trudged between the trees, pushing your bike alongside you, scanning the surrounding area.

“Eddie, where are you?"

The bird chirped from their spot perched in the trees overhead.

"It’s me, your best friend in the whole world, Y/N. Wherever you are, please come out, Eddie,” you yelled intermittently as you followed the trail of the old abandoned train tracks.

You took out your trusty compass and followed the path just south of Lover’s Lake. It felt like your little twelve year old legs had been walking for miles. God only knows how big this midwestern haven could span.

But after a while, you started losing patience. Where was he?

“Eddie, this is the worst game of hide and seek we’ve ever played. And besides, we’re too old for that shit,” you exclaimed.

Even alone in the middle of the forest, a small alarm sounded in the back of your head. If your parents heard you say such a word, you would be in big trouble. Good thing it was just you. 

“Eddie, you little shit,” you humphed as you approached the massive boulder the town seemed to agree on calling Skull Rock.

“Eddie, I swear to god if you–” You frustratedly said under your breath as you turned to the other side of the rock, and almost tripped on a pile of… Eddie Munson and his backpack?

“Eddie,” you gasped and looked down at him. His head hung down and his gaze was cast somewhere in the nearby distance, as if the pile of leaves a few feet away were that captivating.

“Eddie,” you dropped down to your knees, “Where the hell have you been?”

You instinctively wrap your arms around his stiff body, engulfing him in the tightest hug humanly possible. You held him like that for a few moments, softening your grip as any anger at having spent the whole day looking for him dissipated.

“I’ve been looking for you everywhere,” you whispered into his neck, feeling the pricking of buzzed hair at his scalp against your skin.

You pulled away slightly, if just for a moment, to see his face. His chin was turned down and he avoided your gaze. For a split second, he bit his lip and looked up at you, frazzled and afraid.

You didn’t say anything. You just returned to your position with your head in the crook of his neck.

As you held him, neither of you said anything. All you can hear is the deep breath he takes, inhaling the comforting scent of your hair.

He slowly slithers his arms around you and holds you back, increasing the tightness of his hold till you can feel him holding on for dear life.

If something wasn’t wrong before, you could absolutely tell it was now.  

“Eddie,” you whisper as you pull away from his grasp, wanting to look at him face to face again.

“Hmph,” he grunts under his breath as he tightens his hold on you, not letting you get away so fast.

So you sit there and hold him. The sounds of birds chirping and the two of you breathing the other in, audible in the air. You stroke his head, with hair buzzed short, or rub circles along his back.

You’ve never seen Eddie like this. If you weren’t so worried, you might even be afraid.

“Eddie,” you softly ask after minutes of silence. “What happened to you?”

You can feel him shake his head next to yours.

“Eddie, I need you to talk to me okay?”

Eddie’s lip quivers, but he doesn’t say anything.

“I just want to know what happened.”

He shakes his head again.

“Please, Eddie,” you whisper and furrow your face in the crook of his neck, feeling the slow and steady stream of hot tears beginning to flow down your cheeks.

“Why weren’t you at school all week? And why are there a bunch of reporters at your house and your uncle’s trailer?”

Eddie winces and makes a noise signaling pain. But then he begins to feel the warm wet tears on your cheek smear into the skin of his neck and pulls away slightly.

He looks at you incredulously, in shock to see you cry over him.

You take a moment to look him in the eye. His big brown eyes are red and slightly puffy. He sniffles and you smile at him painfully.

“It’s bad,” he whispers and looks away.

You grab his hand and give it a tender squeeze. You don’t expect him to say too much after that. Even though it doesn’t satisfy your curiosity, you wanted an answer and he gave you one. He doesn’t seem well enough to do much more than that.

So you nod and look at him.  

“Really bad,” he adds under his breath.

“I’m sorry,” you respond, at least hoping he might be able to tell you when he’s ready.

Eddie doesn’t say anything for a while, but you continue to gently touch him by rubbing circles along his back or squeezing his left hand which hasn’t let go of yours since you first grabbed it.

“Who do I have to fight?” You asked, finally breaking the peaceful albeit confusing silence.

“What,” Eddie grumbles into your neck. You pull away and find a small smile on his perplexed face.

“Who do I have to fight? Whoever it is that made you feel this way, tell me their address so I can go and give them a piece of my mind. No one messes with my best friend and gets away with it,” you explained triumphantly. 

“Silly girl,” Eddie chuckles as he tucks a stray strand of your hair behind your ear.

“I’m serious Eds. I’ll call backup too.”

“What? You and Raggedy Ann and Andy gonna take on the man?” Eddie asks sarcastically as he absentmindedly drags his fingers along either side of your arm.

“Eddie,” you scoffed as you lightly smacked him in the chest. You made a show of looking around, as if there was someone to hide from, “I told you that in secret.”

Eddie giggles at your reaction, always loving the way he could push your buttons like teasing you about still playing with dolls. Any other moment it would have annoyed you, but now, it puts the biggest smile on your face.

“But if it comes down to it, then yes. We’ll do whatever it takes to fight for justice.”

Eddie’s hands fell defeatedly to your thighs and for some reason it made a weird shiver go down your spine. Before you could even think about why it happened or what it meant, a hardened look fell upon Eddie’s face.

“No need, sweetheart,” Eddie said tensely. 

Even though Eddie was your best friend, he sometimes called you “sweetheart”. He almost always only used it as a joke. Like if you said something goofy or made fun of him back, he’d say something like “Yeah, yeah, whatever you say sweetheart.”

Sometimes the other kids at school would hear you two talk to each other like that. A lot of them would ask if you two were dating. You could have sworn that even some of the teachers started to think so too because they would sit you two next to each other in class.

Even though it wasn’t true, because Eddie was just your best friend, you didn’t mind the special treatment from your teachers.

Otherwise, you had never really given much thought to the name before. It was just one of Eddie’s signature quirks.

But the way he says it now feels strange. There’s more weight to it. The way he says it. The way it feels in your chest when you hear him call you that. It’s all sort of different now.

“What makes you say that?”

“I don’t think Raggedy Ann and Andy have the power to defeat the darkness that is the Hawkins Police, or worse, my dad,” Eddie says as though he’s just told a hilarious joke.

Your head jerks back slightly from his abrasive words and casual tone. Eddie’s dad? And the police? What happened?

“What? Didn’t you hear, sweetheart?” Eddie grins at you in a way that makes your insides crawl. “Daddy’s dancin’ to the jailhouse rock.”

Your eyebrows scrunched together. Eddie wasn’t making any sense. His dad? Jail? And yet the thinly veiled Elvis reference wasn’t even the most surprising part.

“Your dad’s going to jail?” You say when the pieces finally come together.

Eddie never really had any great stories to tell about his dad. They had a… different kind of father-son relationship. Eddie once told her that he’d wished his dad could have taught him how to fish or play catch instead of teaching him how to hotwire a car.

“Looks like the cats out of the bag,” Eddie says with such casual confidence.

“Eddie, I don’t understand,” you grab his shoulders and try to find some sort of understanding just from the look in his eyes.

“Looks like little Eddie Munson’s an orphan now,” Eddie shrugs, still mysteriously smiling.

“Eddie, don’t say that,” you whine as you throw yourself against him in another bear hug. You don’t understand how he’s being so calm and casual about this right now. Or how he could make jokes at a time like this.

“It’s true,” he whispers as he gently tightens his grip around you.

“What about your Uncle Wayne? You could stay with him, right?”

Eddie loved his Uncle Wayne. He’d constantly tell you about the movie marathons in his trailer or the memories of Wayne taking him and his mom to Benny's Burgers on Sundays.

“Yeah, I moved in yesterday.”

You pull away and look into his puffy eyes. The brown of his irises a pool of pain and longing. Too much for any twelve year old boy to handle.

But that explains why Eddie’s been gone. 

Your parents watched the 6:00 news at dinner every night. They started talking about some high profile criminal case but with not many details able to be released just yet. You were sure Eddie and his family would make breaking news tonight.

“What do you say we just run away?” You asked.

Eddie scoffs, “Yeah? And go where?”

“I don’t know,” You shrugged. “Anywhere.”

Eddie took a moment to think about it before saying, “Let’s go to London.”

“London? Why London?”

“It’s far enough away from here,” Eddie sneers.

“It wouldn’t be because it’s home to all your favorite bands, is it?” You ask teasingly.

“Well, it doesn’t hurt to be in the home of the greatest rockstars to ever live,” Eddie says giddily.

You giggle and extend your pinky finger out, “Okay, pinky promise?”

Eddie smiles at you warmly. For the first time all day, he looks happy. He hooks his pinky finger around yours and says, “Pinky promise”.

You and Eddie continue to hang around his favorite hiding spot, Skull Rock, for a little while longer before heading back to his uncle’s trailer and your home before dark. 

When you get home, your parents engulf you in a hug and wail about your absence. 

“Where have you been?”

“We’ve been worried sick?”

“Don’t you ever leave without telling us where you’re going again!”

“We heard about what happened with that Munson boy?”

“It’s not safe for you to be out with him!”

But after a while it all just turned to noise.

You made it home safe and sound. No one got hurt. What were they so worked up about?

And you didn’t understand why they would say things like that. They had known Eddie for years now. He’s the same boy he always was. Eddie wasn’t the one who did the crime, so why was he getting punished?

The thought of all that happened that day kept you well up into the night. As you stared up at your ceiling, you couldn’t help but wonder about Eddie.

What was he doing? Was he sad that his dad was going to jail? Was he relieved to at least be with his Uncle Wayne? You bet he misses his mom now more than ever.

Tap. Tap. Tap.

You turn your head toward the window and climb out of bed, your cotton night dress swooshing as you walk over to it.

You draw the curtains and look out the window to find Eddie down on the front lawn. He mouths something, but it’s too dark and he’s too far away to really see.

But you know what it is. This isn’t the first time Eddie’s done this. 

You see him climbing along the side of your house and up to the second story. You open the window when you see his figure come closer.

“Eddie, it’s one o’clock in the morning,” you whisper as he climbs through the window. He enters the room and stands before you. The streetlights outside illuminating his pale skin, white t-shirt, and plaid pajama pants.

“I know, I couldn’t sleep,” Eddie smiles at you, replying in a voice much louder than a whisper.

“Eddie shh!” You shush him and turn over your shoulder, worried the noise might wake your parents.

Eddie’s smile drops and you frown. 

“I know, I’m tired but I couldn’t sleep either,” you say as you wrap your arms around him. His muscles relax and he returns the gesture. 

“What’s keeping you up?” Eddie asked. Obviously the weight of the week’s events were heavy on his mind, but what could be on yours?

“I’ve been thinking about you. Worrying and hoping you’re okay,” you replied earnestly. There was nothing you had to hide. Not from him.

Eddie pulled away and looked at you incredulously. Stunned to think anyone could care enough to lose sleep over him. 

“C’mon,” you sleepily jerked your head to the side in the direction of your full size bed. It was about the same size as the bed in Wayne’s trailer. It’s funny how he had never really made that connection till now.

You don’t say a word as you pull back the covers and climb into the warm bed with soft pillows. You even make a show of scooting your Raggedy Ann and Andy dolls over for him. 

“Can you put those away,” Eddie cautiously asks as he hesitantly walks over to the other side of the bed, “I feel like they’re watching me.”

You roll your eyes and get up to put them in your closet. For a boy who loves scary movies, he sure does have a weird fear of dolls. Not that you would ever understand since you were too afraid to watch said movies with him.

You make your way back to the bed and see Eddie kicking off his shoes and moving to lie down with you. You get under the cover and he does the same. You face each other and in your borderline sleepy state, you smile at him, feeling much more at ease with him here.

“Does Wayne know you’re here?” You asked.

The few times Eddie’s gone to your house like this was usually when his dad was on one and Wayne was out at work.

“No, he’s got the night shift.”

“Oh,” you reply. You wonder if Eddie felt scared being in that home all alone. If it was still hard to sleep even though his dad was gone now.

Even though you secretly liked when Eddie snuck into your room at night, you always worried that you might get caught or Eddie would hurt himself on the way down or something.

But tonight, you’re glad he’s here without pretense of worry.

You snuggle closer to Eddie and rest your cheek against the cotton fabric barricading you from the skin of his chest. You can hear his heartbeat. The rapid rhythm like music to your ears.

Eddie wraps an arm around you and leans down to press a kiss against the top of your head. 

Eddie’s never done that before. But the act makes you feel warm and like your insides have turned to goo. You tilt your head up to look at him. His soft smile and sleepy eyes visible in the pale moonlight. 

For a brief moment, you smile back. 

There’s so many things you wish you could say but don’t know how. Eddie already knows that he’s your best friend. It’s obvious to anyone that you love and care about him. You don’t want to seem like you pity him, but you worry about how he’s doing with all the changes that are going on in his life. You want him to know that no matter what happens, you’ll be by his side. But how?

The only way you know how, the only way you can possibly sum up all of those feelings is to grab a hold of his shoulder, and reach up to bring your lips to the side of his face, giving him a kiss on the cheek. Not too soft but not too firm. One that lets him know you’re there. Warm and alive and together.

Your hand on his shoulder slides back down to his chest, where you can feel the vibration of his heart beating even faster than it did before. 

Eddie looks down at you and you look back up at him but you can’t quite read his face. His eyes are a little wide, but the rest of his expression is neutral. Not sure if your action was received the way you intended, you start to worry. Did he not like it? Was it a mistake? You think you should probably apologize…

But then Eddie cups your cheek and leans forward and before you can even do or say anything, Eddie’s lips are brushed against yours. His chapped lips press a soft kiss to your smooth ones. His lips linger as he applies pressure to yours. And somehow your body knows just how to respond. Your lips return the same pressure as you kiss him back, feeling him smile against you.

You didn’t even realize your eyes were closed till he pulls away and they flutter open. He smiles at you shyly and you gleam back at him. 

Eddie just gave you your first kiss. The first girl Eddie’s ever kissed is now you. 

Your mind is racing with thoughts. You can’t believe Eddie just kissed you! On the lips! It was weird and unexpected, but you kind of liked it, maybe even enough to want more.

For a moment, you contemplate kissing him again. Like a fool, rushing back in for seconds. But before you can, Eddie uses the hand along your cheek to pull you close to him, letting your head rest against his chest again. 

You’re lying breathless pressed against Eddie’s warm body. Perhaps it should be a relief that after an amazing yet unexpected first kiss, you don’t have to worry about what comes next. You could just enjoy it for what it was: a beautiful moment with the boy you love most.

But that’s just it. The boy you love isn’t the same boy anymore. He’s gone through some hard things. He’s changing right in front of your very eyes. And the love you once had for him isn’t the same kind of love you’re starting to have for him now. 

As summer begins to near, you realize it’ll be the first summer you spend together as something different. Because you aren’t kids anymore. You’ll never be those innocent kids again.

[yummyuta]

four sides to every heart | n.y, j.j, l.m

♡ genre: polyamory, (yuta, jaehyun, mark x reader) | fluff, angst, smut (eventually)!

♡ warnings: cheating | there isn't much for now but this will involve mature nsfw themes

♡ authors note: this is pretty self indulgent as i have been on a yujaemark kick lately! this is one of my first times writing smut so hopefully im not biting off more than i can chew here. this will ultimately become a series (at least 3 parts). i hope you all enjoy reading:)

{preview}

word count - 738 words

summary - you had always considered yourself to be a rational and organized person, meticulously planning every detail of your life. that was until your emotions had become a tangled mess, involving four crucial people - your boyfriend yuta, your roommate jaehyun, and your childhood best friend mark.

you and yuta have been dating for nearly a year. you had met through your mutual friend mark and immediately hit it off. "dont be fooled by his looks, his bark isn't bigger than his bite" is what mark had first said when you met the man who looks like a rockstar. your relationship is the epitome of stability, built on respect and affection. yuta is the kind of partner who makes you feel secure, with his gentle demeanor and unwavering support.

enter jaehyun, your new roommate. jaehyun had moved in a few months ago, stepping into your home and your life with a breath of fresh air. he was calm yet charming with an easy boyish smile. conversations were friendly and flowed easily as he had been a part of your life as long as you had known yuta. as you spent more time together, jaehyun's ability to turn mundane tasks into fun activities—like turning a simple grocery run into a mini-adventure, began to intrigue you.

one rainy evening, and a date night with yuta being canceled, you and jaehyun were left alone in the apartment. you decided to make hot chocolate and watch a movie, a cozy and seemingly innocent plan. as you lounged on the couch, jaehyun’s hand brushed against yours, sending an unexpected shiver down your spine. the closeness felt natural, and before you fully realized what was happening, jaehyun leaned in, your lips meeting in a gentle, hesitant kiss. the movie was long, being forgotten as the sound was drowned out by soft sighs and moans. the kiss was brief but electrifying as you pulled away, eyes in a haze as the shock began to pour in, leaving both heart's pounding. guilt washed over your face as you remembered your commitment to yuta. the next few days were filled with tension. you avoided jaehyun, struggling to come to terms with your unknown and sudden feelings. jaehyun, perceptive as ever noticed your concern, however kept his disance.

the emotional turmoil was further complicated by mark, your childhood friend. mark had been a constant in your life, the one man who would never leave your side no matter what challenges you faced. lately, it seemed mark’s concern for you had taken on a deeper, more intimate meaning. he noticed the changes in your mood and the walls you'd been putting between yourself and others and he wasnt about to stand by and watch you retreat further.

mark asked you to meet him at your "spot" to confront you and be honest about his growing feelings. you drove out to the dock overlooking a lake. as you got out and began approaching him, the whiff of the pine trees in the wind hit your nose, bringing back memories of you and mark playing hide and seek in the woods as kids. you sat down next to mark, bringing one arm around his waist as you snuggled close and put your head on his shoulder. mark took a deep, shaky breath before speaking "you know, i've seen you struggling, and i want you to know i'm here for you." he stopped, contemplating his next move. you could tell he was nervous so you took his hand, slowly rubbing circles with your thumb. this only made his heart accelerate faster, and sweat beads began forming on his forehead. he continued, slowly moving his face closer to yours as he spoke in a volume no more than a whisper as if he would scare you away in an instant when he said "i think i want to be more than just your friend.”

you were slightly taken aback but not entirely opposed, its not like you haven't thought about it before. you slowly let go of his hand and moved back, trying to find the right words to say. "i had no idea, this is just… it’s a lot to process.” mark reached out before composing himself and bringing his arms back to his sides. "i understand if you need time. i just needed you to know how i feel."

faced with such honesty from mark, and a secret kiss shared with jaehyun, you decided it was time to confront yuta. as your fist went to knock at his door, your heart ached with the weight of decision. could this be the end or the start of a new beginning?

ending authors note: i hope you enjoyed this preview! i wanted to set the scene, the next few parts will be exploring the dynamics of the relationships even more so i hope you are all looking forward to it.

[notnctu]

backseat chronicles - n.jm | ridin’ club

━ welcome to the ridin’ club smut series

genre ➠ slow burn, smut, fluff, lil angst  wordcount ➠ 8.5k details ➠ fem!reader, streetracer!jaemin, badboy!jaemin, college!au ━ where Jaemin brings you to his club races as his arm candy. warnings ➠ explicit language, overstimulation, flirty banter, pet names, softdom!jaemin, car sex, praise kink, hittin it raw (y/n on the pill), oral, daddy kink, slight corruption kink, fingering synopsis ➠ There is no reasonable explanation as to why or how you always end up in the backseat of Na Jaemin’s beloved car. Almost routinely, he picks you up around ten in the evening with the stereo blasting the raunchiest lyrics for your entire suburban neighborhood to hear. The entire night remains purely friendly, a dabble of flirtatious comments because well, it’s Jaemin for fuck sakes. But all it takes is one suggestive gaze from his dark, lustful eyes and a drop in his voice that rumbles your core to have you climbing over the seats to get to the back. taglist ➠ @rabbit-doyochi​​​ ; @darkneogotmyback​​​ ; @im-lame-irl​​​ ; @p-mini​​​ ; @niniluvsmarkhyuck​​​ ; @saniahmichael​​ ; @jaehy9ngs​​​ ; @danyxthirstae01​​​ ; @jaehyunoos​​​ ; @pikijaemin​​​ ; @suhweo​​​ ; @yunoyeol​​​ ; @lanadreamie​​​ ; @ta3ilmoon​​​ ; 

a/n ➠ hi yall its author doie❀!! thank you for over 1k notes on this series, im beyond impressed by the amount of attention this got! it really blew up and its so crazy!! i wrote this one with more of a romantic plotline i realized its too hard to keep it pwp with all the story building and characterization i have :)) it’s almost over yall! pls pls leave me feedback im sorry it took so long to write ):

While college lecture rooms are too big to interact with other students, discussion classes are there to ease the difficulty. A classroom for about twenty students from a three hundred person lecture. It’s administered by a clueless TA, who barely began his second term in graduate school.

Unlike lecture, attendance is mandatory for participation points. You show up every time without a fail, so it came as a shock to you when a certain blue haired student finally appeared from the list of absent students.

Na Jaemin. The notorious playboy with looks that kill and partakes in some illegal racing club. It’s as if every person in the room fawns over his aura, Jaemin drips with an inexplicable alluring confidence. You didn’t know anything about him besides the fact that he never shows up for class and rumors about how he’s slept with the entire cheer squad.

But he’s drawn to you like a magnet: always sitting in the available spot next to you, asking about your day before the TA arrives, developing an odd staring problem. You don’t feed much into his attention, minding your own business when he starts with his notably flirtatious greeting.

“You just take my breath away, (Y/N).” Jaemin cocks back in his seat with legs stretched wide in an overly comfortable manner. The smug smirk on his face cannot be ignored, he’s doing the absolute most to get you to pay the smallest attention to him.

“I didn’t do anything in particular to do that, Jaemin.” You respond bitterly, pulling out your notes for today’s discussion class. The TA enjoys wasting the first twenty minutes going over the past lecture slides and running through the most obvious topics.

You pay no mind to Jaemin peering over at you with the single handedly most dreamy eyes and smile --- stars shining in his dark orbs and a dazzling twinkle in his wide toothy grin.

“That’s why you’re so amazing. You do nothing and it still leaves me breathless.” His sneaky eyes examine your clothing choice for the long day. On this warm afternoon, the short tank top does nothing to hide much of your skin and the denim shorts that ride up a little too well drive Jaemin insane. And when you cross your legs together, he swallows the spit that pools in the back of his throat.

Your ears catch onto the murmurs of the rest of the class, the midterm is next week. The wretched midterm that is half of your grade dooms you, it is going to take an endless amount of completely undistracted dedicated hours of study--- “On a more serious note, can you help me with this class?”

His voice shatters your inner panic, if anything, adds to the stress that already beats down on your shoulders. You look up to glare at him, but you’re entirely taken aback by the new styling of his hair and the exposure of his tattoos.

The sweet blue cotton candied strands are ruffled lazily above his brows, messy from him constantly running his hand through them. Jaemin sits relaxed in gray sweatpants that are extremely baggy on his slender figure, hands are shoved casually into the pockets.

But what has you staring for longer is the long sleeve of tattoos that wrap around his left arm. Not that you’re surprised that Jaemin has tattoos, let alone a whole sleeve, but this is your first time seeing it as this is the first time he’s come to class without his leather jacket on. Something about the intricate lines and shadowing make Jaemin seem much cooler, almost more attractive.

When you meet his eyes, his lips curl slowly into a sly side smile and he’s practically eating you up under his gaze. He definitely knew that you were staring and what comes next out of his mouth will haunt you for it. “Like what you see, beautiful?”

“I don’t have the time to help you.” The best way out of this situation is to simply ignore it. Jaemin is overly adored and admired by many, he’ll find someone else to help him.

“Jaemin, do you want to study together?” There you go, folks. The random girl snickers with her small huddle of friends in the upper corner of the room, like a crowd of crows, they’re all waiting around for Jaemin to accept her offer so he can be easily integrated into their little group.

However, you watch how his glances bounce between you and her. The most sickly sweet, kind smile is almost too fake to consider it to be genuine. His final choice surprises you, “thank you for offering, but I only want (Y/N)...”

Your breath hitches and gets caught in your throat as you hope for him to finish his sentence, the drumming of your heart distracting you even more. Jaemin wants you? While the thought is flattering, it puzzles you greatly.

“... to help me with my studies.” Jaemin finishes his sentence after a rather long pause, his eyes finally resting upon your figure shying away and finding any way to seem uninterested in the conversation. “Is that going to be okay, (Y/N)?”

“What do I get out of it?” You can’t believe that you are actually considering it. But this is a man that only wants you to help him. Jaemin is an impossible, yet charming man and whatever comfortable attire he is wearing today is really aiding in his request.

He lights up, ears perked up and eyes attentive. His hands fold together on the empty desk, leaning forward towards you. “Dates with me.”

Rolling your eyes, you groan slightly at the arrogant answer. “I don’t care about that. I want something that benefits me.”

“I’ll make sure you’re well fed.” There is a tiny plea in his tone, a remarkable shift from his cool aura. “What do you want? I’ll give it to you.”

“I guess I can’t turn down free food…” there is a hang in your sentence as you contemplate what chaos you’re about to dive into and what life changes are about to be explored with Jaemin.

“Before you agree,” Jaemin chuckles, “there’s one more thing I’d like you to do for me.”

You’re quick to shoot a daggering glare at the overly enthusiastic boy, “why do I suddenly owe you favors?”

“Because I say so.” He deadpans, a chill running down your spine at the deep dip in his octave. The playfulness that was present all this time suddenly vanished, a serious look that intimidates you, but sexy enough to where it erupts something in your core. He blinks at you with dark clouded eyes and you nervously anticipate what he is going to ask next of you.

“Accompany me to my races.” He speaks lowly as if he’s afraid of someone else eavesdropping in the conversation.

Here’s your issue with that request: you’ve never really been part of that scene. You’ve lived pretty mundanely, even in college. It’s simple, you like to stay within the boundaries of what you enjoy to do and what you have to do. But you’re always open minded and willing to try something to determine whether or not you’re fond of it.

Partying and drinking copious amounts of alcohol weren’t your favorite things to do, especially to the point of forgetting your nights. You wanted to remember your nights as much as you do your days. The youth isn’t here for long, why waste them by blacking out in the middle of a large party? Also, whoever said that alcohol goes down smooth is a blatant liar.

Illegal racing could possibly be an extension of people who participate in those things, which is fine, but does place a crippling fear of coming off too boring or unrelatable inside your nervous system. But just because you don’t do those things doesn’t mean that you’re not as cool, right?

Since when was your status based nonsensically on how often you spend your nights in socializing crowds full of sweaty bodies and how much cheap booze you can drink? It had to be all in your head --- you’re just dreading any awkward socializing with people who race cars when it’s absolutely illegal.

“Why me?” It’s a genuine answer, possibly stemming from your insecurities of not being on the same level of charm as Jaemin exudes. You’re not a fool, you’re well aware of the many different people he comes across on campus so, why you?

Jaemin doesn’t hesitate to answer, “why not you? You’re just my type. Hot and smart. Cute and a little shy. The greatest duality, if you ask me.” His words seem so genuine that it has you believing these things about yourself as well.

Nonetheless, you’re taken aback by his observations and his choice of descriptions. “We’ve barely ever talked. How can you say these things so confidently about me?”

Jaemin slightly pulls your chair closer to his own and you yelp in response to the sudden movement and lack of space that separates the two of you. He leans into you, breath hot on your skin and obvious eyes darting between your shocked ones and pretty lips.

“So let’s get to know each other. I can already tell that it’ll just make me fall for you even more.” His finger lightly traces your jaw, stopping at your chin to give it a small lift to meet his focus. Jaemin loves how you squirm underneath his intensity, you’re too cute to let go. “Plus, my boys will love you. I’m sure of it.”

The TA rushes in quickly and is utterly distressed from the traffic that had pushed back his schedule. “Sorry, I’m late everyone.” He rummages through his things to find his notes, but groans to see that the monitor of the computer is off. It’s going to take him another ten minutes to input all his credentials.

But your attention doesn’t stray from Jaemin, especially with his delicate touch at the bottom of your chin. His gentle smile enacts nothing but a soft love, and a peak of interest. Na Jaemin, the one and only. He’s like an adventure waiting to be explored, an open bottle of fun for you to take a sip.

“What would I have to do?” Your voice comes out shaky.

“Just be there as your pretty self.” Jaemin comes off as the type to always have women around him, “you’ll be my lucky charm. For some reason, I always feel better around you.”

The escalation of this conversation is possibly more action you’ve had to handle in the last two years. Jaemin drops your chin and falls back into his own seat with his arms crossed. He is about to turn your life upside down and whether that be a good or bad thing, you don’t mind. You’re excited for the new thrills that come with being by Na Jaemin’s side.

Jaemin’s hot hands lift your shirt quickly, throwing it towards the front seat of his car. His lips return to your soft neck, nibbling at your skin tenderly and with love bites that will remind you of his gentle touches. The streetlamps outside flicker impatiently as you feel the eagerness soaking your panties and he lifts you up to take them off.

“My sweet girl,” his voice is light and airy that it becomes almost lost in the heat of the car. “You’re excited tonight. Did you miss me?” The devilish smirk can be felt upon your collarbones.

“Yes, I haven’t seen you for almost five days.” A peculiar whine settles in your pout and Jaemin’s low growl sends shivers down your spine. The only barrier are his own tight jeans and your hands are fast at unbuckling his belt. Jaemin relaxes back, forearms resting on your soft thighs and watching the neediness in your expression and the speed of your hands. He smiles to himself seeing you this way, wanting him so badly that you can’t wait to get him out of his jeans.

Throughout the two months that you and Jaemin finally became well acquainted, he’s fallen inexplicably into your trance. His friends made it very clear to you that he doesn’t keep the same girl around for more than a few weeks. But he’s brought you to almost every race so far and despite the initial shock of your appearance after the third time, you didn’t let the passing comments phase you.

Why he hasn’t replaced you is unknown and truthfully, there is no reasonable explanation how you always wind up in the backseat of his car by the end of the night. It’s become part of your routine. Jaemin picks you up around ten in the evening with raunchy lyrics blasting out of his personalized car for your entire suburban neighborhood to hear. More often than not, Jaemin has food ready for you to devour and a cozy blanket for your exposed legs.

You’ve learned a bit more about him through your backseat chronicles. Jaemin is possibly one of the only people in your life with a heart bigger than his own body, while also being as carefree as he can. Oddly enough, he cares about you as his friend and as his companion. Not to mention the ridiculous, yet endearing nickname, “Lucky Charm”, that he has coined upon you.

Jaemin has been the best adventure you’ve had in ages. While he takes you on intoxicating thrill rides on the leather of his back seats, every street race has been more than unforgettable. He shares one of the same values as you --- wanting to remember the present. You both know that you’ll remember each other enough for it to transcend into your next lives.

You have him to thank for your youthful experiences, to learn and dive into this new found world of mischief under his care. Jaemin treats you extraordinarily well, he’d never hurt a soul. He showers you in appraisal and carefulness, he’s attentive to your behavior and remembers your favorite things. And he reminds you almost every time you see him that he’s so grateful to have you in his life.

“Have you been touching yourself?” Jaemin’s bold question catches you off guard as it causes your hands to shyly hover over his unzipped jeans. When you glance up at him with soft innocent eyes, as if you’re guilty of a crime and wish to beg for forgiveness, his facial expression is serious and intimidating. 

“Continue, baby. You can be honest with me. Daddy isn’t going to punish you if you did.” His tone is sweet and light, but his eyes are dark and piercing. His lips are drawn tightly into a thin line, no curve in sight.

His finger grazes down your cheek gently as he admires your slightly parted lips and the way your eyelashes dance every time you blink. However, his other hand urges you to continue your previous action of getting him out of his restrictive jeans.

You nod, while rubbing his erection through his gray briefs that hug him so tightly. There’s a sharp intake of breath when you pull the waistband of his underwear down and his cock stands against his lower abdomen. “Do you think of me when you do?” His voice gets caught in his throat when you take him in your warm hand.

“Always.” You kiss his jawline and fix your position above his dick. Your slick pussy presses down against his shaft, coating it in your juices and rubbing his tip to your clit for a delicious sensation. Jaemin groans, his gaze dipping between your lower bodies and back to your face.

“My sweet (Y/N) thinks about her daddy fucking her senseless while she touches herself.” Jaemin chuckles darkly, grinding his hips harder against you. There is a shift in the atmosphere as he grips your hips and slowly enters your dripping hole. “That’s cute, baby.”

You hold onto his shoulders as his raw dick fills you to the brim, stretching you out like past nights. Gasps leave your body when he starts pulling all the way out to only have you sink back down. “Daddy, please just fuck me.”

Jaemin picks up his speed, knowing that you have a quiz due at midnight that you scolded him for forgetting earlier. The grip on his shoulders tighten as this man navigates your body all too well. He knows you like the back of his hand, fucking the spot that causes your body to lose control.

One of his favorite sights in the world is the view of your lips parted open with loud whimpers falling effortlessly. Your eyes roll back into your skull as his hips roll deeper into your walls, the tip hitting your sweet spot repeatedly.

“You’re always the best girl for me, aren’t you?” His hand wraps around your neck when you throw your head back, choking you lightly and your walls grip around his shaft. “I know you’re close. Cum on my dick, baby. Be a good girl.”

Jaemin’s tattoos shine under the moonlight when you peer down at him. His hooded eyes are intoxicated by the pure image of your fucked out body and he’s truly in love. “My good girl, come on baby.” He continues to encourage, his other hand giving you a smack on your ass when he drills mercilessly into you.

The familiar bubbling occupy your lower half and the feeling of release unravels all so suddenly. You fall forward, Jaemin lets go of your neck to hold your limp body close to him, your head on his shoulder as your orgasm overtakes you. He grinds his hips into you to prolong your shaking climax, cooing sweet nothings in your ear as his other hand takes a whole handful of ass to squeeze.

He bottoms out, filling you up to the rim to cum deep inside of you. Jaemin moans loudly, his cum spilling all over your walls. You two sit like that until he grows soft, pampering your temples with gentle kisses. Jaemin remembers to take care of you, no matter what.

While you’re in his arms, he reaches for sanitary wipes in the side compartments. He lifts your hips slowly to pull out and you sigh at the emptiness. Gently, he swipes at the dripping cum from your pussy and makes sure that you’re all cleaned up before getting dressed.

“So, you want to tell me why you’ve been MIA for the past five days?” Rolling your eyes, you pull up your panties and fix the last decency of your hair.

“Car meets that are too far for me to take you.” His thumb rubs your chin lovingly and Jaemin’s eyes are so bright and mesmerizing, you find that it’s hard to look him in the eye at times.

“Not because you’ve been hooking up with other girls?” There is a tinge of sarcasm that laces your rhetorical question and though you don’t expect him to give you an actual answer, you take note of his reaction. Jaemin raises an eyebrow, clearing his throat and looking out the window away from you.

“And if I was?” Truthfully, that question hurt you more than your’s hurt him. His hand rests underneath his chin as he patiently waits for your answer. He admires the clear night sky and the rundown abandoned liquor store that stands all by itself.

“What do you want me to say?” Question after question, a stiff tension replaces the sex of the car.

“I’ll take you back now.” Jaemin crawls back to the driver’s seat, completely ignoring your confused figure. He has always been quite like this: going aloof whenever he wants to dodge something. However, it’s been happening more frequently the past times you two have been seeing each other.

The truth is simple, yet entirely complex at the same time. You and Jaemin aren’t dating, despite always going out together and him posessively introducing you to other men. You and Jaemin aren’t dating.

Nevertheless, it doesn’t stop you from growing feelings for him and you can tell that this happens too often for the attractive boy. He can’t have a fuckbuddy that won’t fall head over heels for him. But who could really blame you? Even if all this time Jaemin was pretending that he cared about you, he still pampers you like a princess; he still tells you he does.

But when it comes to discussion about advancing into something more, he hides and grows silent. This has you wondering, maybe this entire thing to him is all sex? And he can’t love you back the way you do.

No one knows his heart, not even himself. He’s never wanted to complicate his life, it’s always been about two things: racing and having fun. There is no easy way to explain it all, the thoughts that flood his mind and heart, so he chooses every way to ignore it. Overall, he’s genuinely lost. You are one source of stability in his life that he isn’t willing to let go, ever. But just because he won’t let you go, doesn’t mean that you won’t take the chance to leave when you’re fed up with him.

This has him wondering, how far can he push before he pushes you too far?

“No, it’s fine. I’ll just walk.” Tonight is unsettling, it usually doesn’t end like this. Jaemin locks the car doors and turns around to reach for your hand. “Jaemin, open the door.”

“I want you to say that you hate when I sleep with other people.” Jaemin confesses all too wildly as his hand lightly squeezes around your wrist. “And I want you to mean it.” He’s only speaking words of truth that haven’t had the time to process in his own thoughts.

“I hate when you sleep with other people.” And you do mean it. You mean it more than anything you’ve ever said to this man. Jaemin just sighs, bringing your wrist to his lips for a lasting kiss.

“Can I drive you home?” Jaemin asks softly, eyes dipping down to the leather seats and avoiding all need for eye contact.

“Yes, Jaemin.” He pulls you back into the passenger seat and drapes the soft blanket over your exposed legs. “Hopefully, I still have time to take my quiz.”

“Can I come inside?” Jaemin coolly turns his marble wheel to reverse out of the parking space, a hand resting on the shoulder of your seat as he does a double take behind him for any pedestrians, even if you two are far out in the middle of nowhere and there isn’t anyone around; Jaemin knows you have the hots for him when he does that specific move.

“What do you mean? You’ve already cum inside.”

It’s the sound of disappointment as his tongue tsks at you and he flicks lightly at your forehead. He steps on the acceleration, revving the annoying engine that roars throughout the peaceful night. The multicolored lights illuminate around his stereo and at your feet, creating the Rainbow Road right out of Mario Kart. 

Jaemin isn’t like the others who pay close attention to the details of his car. His motto goes, “if I like it, I’m going to have it.” Whether or not anything matches goes beyond his worries.

In some ways, his car is a mirror of his own personality --- wild and free, colorful and welcoming. And his skills as a driver? Safe, no matter how far the speedometer goes, Jaemin always makes you feel safe.

“I mean come inside your room for aftercare. You know how much I hate leaving you without a proper cuddle.” He pouts and almost immediately his cute baby tone comes out with his beg. Almost subconsciously, Jaemin lays his right palm open facing up to invite yours in. Almost routinely, you lace your hands to complete his hold. Getting Jaemin to smile has never been easier as his hold grows tighter.

“You can’t stay over tonight though. My housemates are doing some Single Girls Only house event tomorrow and it starts immediately when we wake up.” You laugh as the ridiculous words fill the air.

“And you’re participating in that?” Jaemin mindlessly asks and you’re unable to differentiate his implications from the question. Is he asking because the idea is horrendously nothing you’d like to do or he’s implying that you’re not single?

“Why wouldn’t I?” Sounding rather harsher than intended, Jaemin finally realizes how poorly he had worded his previous question. Yet, a part of him feels disappointment whirling in his chest and a desire to feel wanted by you.

“Doesn’t seem like something you’d like: wallowing in your singleness.” He chuckles, remaining lighthearted and playful.

“I really don’t.” Jaemin brings your knuckles up to his lips for a lingering kiss, his eyes darting quickly on the road ahead now that you’ve entered the metropolitan areas and his speed drops significantly to avoid getting ticketed.

“I’ll come pick you up. Instead of being single tomorrow, you’ll be on a date.” When you turn to examine his facial expression, the serious tension in his jawline and focused eyes alarm you. Your stomach twists into knots and if he couldn't already tell, your palms grow sweaty at his offer.

“That’s such a slap in the face to them.” Pulling your hand away from his, you cross your arms and lean your head against the cold window. “I don’t think I can do that to them.”

“I have a race tomorrow.” He starts, his head tilting over at you with his round gorgeous begging eyes, “at least, come to that with me.”

“Okay, but only because I want to see Haechan.” As if it wasn’t moments ago, Jaemin was the one balls deep in you and now you’re spewing enthusiasm for another man. It’s all a joke, a way for you to conceal your undying attraction for Jaemin.

You still remember the first time you met the sunshine that is Haechan and the jealousy that seeped from Jaemin’s words when he noticed the exchange of flirtation. Haechan is someone you’d knowingly gravitate towards: a man with a loud personality that just knows how to conduct every personality in the room. And at that moment, Jaemin couldn’t tell if being more observant was a good or bad thing.

Jaemin never saw himself as outgoing as his other friends, staying more kept in his own circle, but he had the confidence to fake it. He’s bold, rather impulsive and slightly narcissistic, Jaemin knows how to use his strengths very well. 

However, when he saw the soft smirk on Haechan’s face and your shy mannerisms, a small tinge in his chest ignited a died out flame. He didn’t realize it before, but that was the very start of his long tumble of feelings for you.

“Do you say those things to purposefully get me jealous?” Jaemin rests his hand on your thigh, giving it a harsh squeeze. His eyes never leave the road and his tone reverts back to his dominant tone.

“Well, are you jealous?” It’s like you two dance in circles, answer questions with a question does not stop.

And as bratty as your tone is, you don’t expect the quick “yes” that answers back and the smoldering look he gives you briefly before focusing back on the drive.

“Then good.” You huff, ready to hop out of the car after the odd, yet sensual tension. Jaemin pulls up to your house and double parks the car to lean in for a nightly goodbye kiss.

“You’re not coming in?” You try to read his facial expressions, but he hides his emotions too perfectly.

His lips curl into a smile before saying, “I think it’s better I cool off tonight.” And you mindlessly give him a peck, but he holds your face to deepen it. Through the kiss, you can feel the neediness by the way Jaemin shoves his tongue into your mouth. The taste of lust against your palette is difficult to ignore, but your academically responsible mind screams at you about your forgotten quiz.

Your hand lightly taps at his chest and he pulls away, his eyes drinking up your swollen lips. “I have a quiz, Jaemin.”

“I know, sorry. It’s just so easy to get lost in you.” Jaemin kisses your cheek once more before you exit. You smile back at him as his words have grown a strong effect on you lately. Bidding him goodbye, he wishes you sweet dreams as he patiently makes sure you’re fully inside your house.

“Is the music too loud?” Jaemin checks over at your hunched figure in the passenger seat. You’re diligently flipping through your thick textbook, a yellow highlighter in one hand and the other comfortably holding Jaemin’s.

The worst part of college is the never ending midterms that are given at any time. Studying in his car isn’t a rare sight, if anything it is more expected than you not doing anything related to your academics. But Jaemin genuinely doesn’t mind, even being mindful about his own actions to ensure an optimal studying space for you.

He really is an ideal guy. Like his first promise, he keeps you well fed and never once asks you for any monetary pay back. Jaemin adjusts the car temperature before you even step into the vehicle, knowing that you prefer wearing less clothes rather than more. Though he isn’t academically responsible, he still makes the effort to try and understand enough information to pass his classes.

The sole flaw would be the lack of open communication. It’s genuinely difficult for you to read his emotions or intentions. Jaemin always has a dazed look in his eyes whenever he looks at you, and it’s an internal fight about whether or not you’re being delusional.

“Music is fine, honey.” The mindless use of a pet name slips from your lips, but your concentration on neoliberalism and globalization doesn’t allow for you to notice.

Nevertheless, Jaemin catches on immediately to the usage. While he showers you in ridiculous nicknames, you’re not one to do so. “Honey?”

“Yes?” You answer back carelessly, not entirely actively listening to him as you highlight an important concept in your book.

“No, you called me honey.”

Looking up from your page, you blink at him with wide eyes and mouth slightly agape. “I did?”

Jaemin chuckles and finally pulls into the overly crowded parking lot, a whole mass of fanboys cheering at the arrival of his flashy vehicle. Everyone just loves Jaemin.

This familiar scene plays like a reel --- several high beams cast light under the dark sky due to the lack of functioning street lamps, dizzy multicolored cars that blaze the tracks, and the all too distinct smell of musky cologne in the chilly air. Oh, and the wide eye admirable stares when you get out of the car.

“Hi, you’re stunning.” A bold new recruit blinks at you in complete awe and awkwardly clears his throat once he realizes his rash comment.

Jaemin raises an eyebrow at him, then at how you plan on handling the situation. You’re flattered, nonetheless, but know that Jaemin didn’t bring you here to flirt with other men. “Thank you. I hope you enjoy your membership in the Ridin’ Club.”

The gracefulness in your delicate voice has the youthful recruit swooning and subtly giddy as he runs off to join a group of others that have been eying you across the parking lot. Jaemin casually drapes his leather jacket over your exposed shoulders, knowing the temperature change is going to result in you most likely catching a cold and because you never bring a jacket despite his plea.

“The power you hold.” Jaemin winks at you before pulling you into a larger crowd to socialize with more impressionable recruits.

“Ah, so you’re (Y/N)!” The stranger is unrecognizable, but you giggle to acknowledge his confident statement. “We haven’t met before, but Jaemin was talking about you the other night at our motorcycle meet.”

Your eyes light up, as if you’ve unlocked a new fun fact of Na Jaemin. “You drive a motorcycle too?” You’re truly shocked at the talent of this man.

Jaemin snakes his arm around your lower waist to draw you closer to his side. “Yeah, but I can’t fuck you in a motorcycle, can I?”

Before the other men can comment on the obvious sexual tension that Jaemin created, he leans in to whisper into your ear. “Actually, I can, but we’ll save our decency from unwanted exposure.” His hot breath grazes against the shell of your ear and you just know where you two are going to end up tonight.

“Bro, you guys probably fuck in the backseat of his car.” One of them chimes recklessly, punching at each others’ chest playfully as if he made a decent joke.

“Why don’t you stay to find out?” Jaemin retorts and the grip on your hip becomes tighter. You’re too flustered to add much into this odd form of competitive banter, distracted by none other than the way Jaemin keeps glancing over at you with a delicious gleam in his eyes.

“So what? You don’t care about us now?” You’d know that bratty tone from anywhere as Lee Haechan pushes past everyone else to rush over to the both of you.

“Aw, are your feelings hurt?” Jaemin sticks his tongue out at his friend before cordially sharing a handshake with him.

“Just slightly.” Haechan looks over at you with a wide grin and playful eyes, “hello, my pretty girl.”

“Drop the possessives, Haechan.” Jaemin rolls his eyes with an irritable twitch on his lips.

He hates how obviously jealous he gets. It’s something too difficult for himself to control, he’s exhausted his efforts to bite his tongue whenever it comes to other people’s flirtations. The thought of someone else calling you theirs doesn’t sit well with him.

“I understand your jealousy, Jaem. If someone was flirting with (Y/N), I wouldn’t be able to stand it either.” Haechan fixes the falling jacket on your shoulders. “But she can handle herself, I know those pretty lips have a mind of their own.” His gaze drops momentarily, yet obvious enough for you to grow shy at how strong Haechan is coming off tonight.

“Stop trying to corrupt her, that’s my job.” Jaemin playfully pushes at Haechan’s chest and they both break out laughing.

“I haven’t said one thing and you’re both talking about me as if I’m not here.” Your small pout is literally the cutest thing to Jaemin. He physically has to stop himself from planting the sweetest kiss on it.

It’s blatantly clear that you’re hot stuff. You’re the perfect example of a head turner, your captivating aura has its ability to suffocate those around you. However, Jaemin has seen all sides of you, but overall finding you so entirely cute. And oddly enough, Jaemin has a knack for cute things.

“Is that (Y/N) I hear?” Huang Renjun engulfs you in a hug, showing clear affection and doesn’t mind doing so. “How did your project go?”

“It went well. You accomplish a lot when you don’t procrastinate.” Renjun gleams at your statement and if Jaemin is delusional enough, he’d probably mistaken the twinkle in his eyes for infatuation instead of admiration.

“You’re so responsible, why are you messing with Jaemin?” Renjun sighs and though his question is more of a joke, there is some truth behind his words.

Your friendship with his friends differ immensely compared to other girls who have come around. Like Jaemin had said before, his boys were going to like you and they do, a lot. Sometimes making it obvious that you’re too good for him.

Jeno comes up from the side, an unidentifiable bruise on his neck and a new cut on his brow. Lee Jeno being such a rough character, his appearance speaks well about how his day has been.

But when he lays his eyes on you, it’s as if all his pain is replaced with joy and security. “(Y/N)! I haven’t seen you in so long!” The enthusiastic boy rushes over to greet you with a warm smile.

“I’m pretty sure I was here a week ago.” You laugh, but welcome him in your arms for a tender friendly hug and pat his head out of habit.

“It’s been a week?! That’s so long.” Jeno narrows his eyes at Jaemin and flicks his forehead.

“Ow!” Jaemin exclaims while rubbing the pain away. “You act like she doesn’t go to the same school as us and therefore, can see her any time you want to.” The tone in Jaemin’s voice raises some eyebrows as they all exchange glances to each other before bursting into laughter.

“Like your jealous ass would allow for that?” Haechan remarks and Jaemin doesn’t outwardly react. However, Jaemin’s hand is squeezing you so tight that you’re more than certain he’s bothered by the comment.

“Oh, stop it. You all know I’m Team Jaemin. He does have the most wins this past month.” You only know that through Jaemin’s proud boasting, anything else in the racing world is unknown to you.

Jaemin situates you in between his legs as he slightly sits on the hood of his car. His arms wrap around your middle and chin rests on your shoulder. Public display of affection isn’t a problem for him, and you learned much earlier that Jaemin can’t keep his hands off of you.

Renjun scoffs at your whimsical fact, in absolute disbelief. “It hurts more hearing you say it. I’m getting my car upgraded, but once it’s done, I’m going to blaze his ass on the tracks.”

“Are you racing today?” Jeno asks the blue haired fellow that clings onto you like a koala.

“Yeah, against a newbie. Apparently he’s really good, so I’m not too sure I’ll win.” Jaemin mumbles into your hair.

“You say that every time, yet you win!” Renjun crosses his arms, weight shifting to his left leg as he pops his hip out. There is always a sense of competition between anyone with Renjun.

Jaemin perks up behind you and when you turn around in his arms, you’re face to face with a beaming smile. “That’s because I have you.” Eyes lock with yours, he isn’t saying that directed to Renjun. Na Jaemin has you wrapped around his pinky, the butterflies fluttering in your stomach are too hard to ignore.

“Alright, lovebirds. Get in your car and let’s start this shit.” Haechan groans and claps his hands to draw the crowd’s attention. Cupping them around his mouth, he roars into the starry night, “let’s roll!”

During the race, Jaemin’s number one priority is to keep you safe. While you’ve sat in his car for a number of times now, it’s different once the loud bang goes off and he’s hitting 100 mph. Tonight’s track is much more dangerous, with twists and turns that can have the vehicle flying weightlessly if he’s not careful.

“You trust me, right?” Jaemin has both hands on the wheel and the engine rumbling as you both anticipate the start of the race.

Spectators watch on the sidelines as if it’s the ultimate battle, but Jaemin doesn’t pay them much mind. He’s more concerned about you instead. “Of course. If I didn’t, I wouldn’t be sitting here right now. You’ve proven yourself that you’re an excellent driver, so let’s win this.”

Jaemin smirks at your encouraging words, feeling a warmth spread across his chest. “I’ll tap out any time you want me to, okay?”

You nod and the initial whip of the car is so intense that you didn’t even register the sound off. It’s not your first race, but it’s been awhile since the last one. When you adjust to the pressure, the lanes in front of you cause a slight queasiness in your stomach.

It’s a two lane windy road that wraps around the mountain side and Jaemin happens to be in the outer lane. All it takes is a second of lost control and you two will hit the metal railings that guard the cliff below. Despite your inner panic, Jaemin guides you through the pooling anxiety that leaves you restless.

“(Y/N), look up and out the window. We’re coming up on the cliff side view, I’ve always wanted to bring you here.” Your eyes land on the dazzling glitter that dances on the ripples of the lake. It’s so vast, the moon high up in the sky is reflected on the water below. It’s a romantic scene of melancholy and bliss. Suddenly, you feel at peace in the middle of this high speed race.

“It’s beautiful, Jaem.” You whisper calmly and he’d reach for your hand to hold, but races take too much wheel control. And he’d turn to look at you, but races take too much concentration on the road ahead.

But throughout every obstacle, he hears the gentleness and the solidarity in your cadence in the midst of all the high stress. He, too, feels peace. He feels calm knowing that you’re simply by his side, even in the face of danger. So, he can finally admit to himself… he genuinely developed feelings for you.

Before you know it, you’re thrusted side to side from the sharp turns and the adrenaline kicks in when the other racer catches up right next to Jaemin. “Fuck,” Jaemin curses underneath his breath and steps harshly on the acceleration. “Baby, I’m going to go a bit faster so hold onto something.” He warns and your hand finds the grab handle. It’s neck and neck at this point.

Usually, you squeeze your eyes shut to avoid becoming too overwhelmed by the sights in front of you. Tonight is different, not entirely knowing why, you’re observing every element that circles around the perimeter.

The finish line is up ahead, but there is no sign that the other racer is slowing down. Then, you see it: the fatal mistake that can cost you both of your lives if you didn’t catch it. “Jaemin, watch out!” You yelp when the other car inches dangerously close, your warning allows Jaemin to make a controlled swerve away from a possible hit.

Jaemin shakes his head and tsks at the recklessness. “Now I know why he’s good. It’s foul play.” He blows his bang out of his eyes and casually says, “thank you for warning me. This is why I need you by my side.”

He makes it to the finish line barely before the other, winning the race by half a second. Jaemin brakes smoothly, tire marks scrapping the concrete below, and you both exit the car to celebrate with everyone else.

But before the mass of eager shouting men make their way over to you two, Jaemin hurries to your side to pull you into a steamy, rewarding kiss. The scene is just like the movies; his hand on your lower back and yours on his chest lightly. His lips taste like triumph, like he had won more than just a simple race against a random stranger. He’s won the best person he could ever have.

You two fled the scene after cussing out the other racer. It was a rare sight to see: Jaemin being all bothered and angry, practically fuming after scrambling back into the driver’s seat. However, your mind had mischievous plans of its own and all it took was one look from his hooded eyes for you to announce that you wanted him --- badly.

Back in your usual abandoned parking lot, Jaemin pauses before following you to the back seats. With the engine off and the dead of the night being absolute silent, the tension remains thick around you two. “(Y/N),” Jaemin is about to confess something he never thought he’d admit. He turns to you sitting in the middle seat with just your panties on and a curious look on your face.

His heart burns and despite being so incredibly aroused, he controls his urges enough to be able to say, “I’m into you.”

“I know you’re into me, that’s how we ended up like this in the first place.” You giggle cluelessly to his words, still not understanding the odd shift in mood and intentions. It’s always his unclear, messy intentions.

Though he can’t entirely figure out his puzzle pieces, he has plenty to connect the dots. “I like you. I want to be in a relationship with you and call you my girlfriend.”

You’re stunned. Did Jaemin just confess to you as you sit in your panties ready to fuck? This softness is different from the sides you’ve seen of him. It’s similar to a lost bunny, wandering grasslands to find a purpose. He looks so fragile, one intense stare and he’d crumble. This softness is vulnerability.

“So do it.” The boldness catches him off guard, but switches on the dominance in him. “If you want me, come show it.”

He climbs over the middle console to push you into the leather seats. “Not acting shy anymore, are you?” Practically ripping your shirt off of you, he cups your breast lightly and flicks at your nipples. Your immediate reaction results in a rush of wetness down your core.

“Before I forget,” sitting up, you share a passionate kiss that you’ve held back long enough. You give it every ounce of feeling you have for him. “If it isn’t obvious enough, I like you too.”

“It’s obvious, baby.” Kissing your nose, he wraps a hand around your throat to lightly push you back down. “But hearing you say it out loud makes me happy.” Jaemin smirks, hand still choking you gently and pampering your jawline with soft kisses.

His free hand reaches down into your dripping panties, circling your clit with your wetness. The sensation causes you to whimper for more. “Daddy, give it to me.” You wiggle in his palm, knowing that the nickname is more than effective.

“My sweet (Y/N) wants to get fucked?” Jaemin rolls your underwear off and rids himself of his own bottoms.

“Yes, please.” Through the darkness, his hard dick stands proudly. Jaemin lines himself up as he thrusts into you without another second of hesitation. He waits for you to adjust to his size, his tip barely grazing your sweet spot. “Fuck…”

“You take me so well, my pretty baby.” Jaemin starts moving his hips, slowly at first to build a rhythm. Taking your legs, he presses them into your chest to fuck you at a deeper angle. And you feel him practically in your guts, his cock pumping against your walls deliciously and bumping into your g-spot. “Do you want more of me?”

Your train of thought is in utter shambles and whatever Jaemin is saying to you barely processes. You’re overwhelmed by a pleasure that fills every system, every part of your body. To answer him, you let out an incoherent noise of approval.

Jaemin pulls your hips down while thrusting forward into you, maximizing every inch of his strokes. This single action causes you to scream and grip onto the headrest. “Who knew my sweet girl could be so fucking dirty?” Jaemin chuckles darkly, his cadence dropping several decibels. “When I first met you, I wanted to ruin you.”

All of his filthy words edge you closer to your release as he continues to repeat his previous motion. He holds your hips in place to grind into you, the feeling of his tip rubbing your walls has your eyes rolling back. “Do you want to cum, (Y/N)?”

“Yes!” You yell, the tight ball in your lower abdomen is bound to break any minute. “I want to cum so badly, please.” You beg and moan, the arch in your back lifts you from the seat of the car. Jaemin snaps his hips into you, drilling you quickly to reach your high. And you break. An euphoric cry fills the air as your walls clench around his length. You hear the extra wetness create a slick noise, but Jaemin isn’t done with you yet.

“You wanted to cum so fucking badly. I’ll reward you with one more for being such a good girl for me.” His thumb flicks at your clit and you convulse into spasms from the sensitivity. Your violently shaking legs can’t hold themselves up anymore and Jaemin rests them on his shoulders. He lines kisses along your ankle as the pleasure overtakes you.

“I don’t think I can do it.” You whine, your fingers twisting and toes curling.

“You are going to try, okay baby?” He coos, but it’s most definitely a demand. He sits back on his knees to pick up more speed, fucking endlessly into your swollen pussy and thumb rubbing fast strips against your bud.

“I’m going to snap, Jaem.” You cry, tears rimming your eyes and before you know it, a second wave hits you. Your second orgasm is ruinous and has you squirming around to regain some sense of control.

“Oh fuck, you’re so beautiful.” Jaemin slows down as your walls grip around him again, tighter this time. “I’m going to fill you up with cum,--- watch it drip out of you.” He grunts while releasing into you, his dick twitching and spraying your insides with white.

He pulls out as hot, white cum spills from your pussy. You take this moment to catch your breath and relax your legs. However, Jaemin coats his two fingers and shoves the cum back into you. “Jaemin!” You exclaim at the sudden intrusion.

He curls them into your plushy walls and finger fucks you into another oblivion. “Wait, again?” Your hands wrap around his wrist, but Jaemin moves too fast for you to catch it.

You’re a moaning mess again, louder than before. Jaemin leans down and flicks his tongue against your overstimulated bundle of nerves. Your back arches automatically and a low animalistic scream rises from your throat.

He observes your body lines underneath the moonlight and the last remaining light the broken street lamps have to offer. Your face contours and you’re so far out into ecstasy that you don’t notice how intensely Jaemin watches you lose yourself.

“It feels too good!” With one last thrilling orgasm, you almost pass out and you see small stars of dizziness. He soaks up every last bit of your cathartic reaction and festers a small sense of pride that he can make you feel all this pleasure.

“Such a good girl. You’re beyond impressive, baby.” Jaemin pulls his fingers out to lick them clean and finds some wipes to help you out of your sticky situation.  

“Now that you’re my girlfriend, can we cuddle at any time now? Not just as after care.” He peers up at you and the one word enacts a burning warmth to spread across your chest. That is the best nickname he can call you by.

“I think the Singles Girls Only house event is still going on, but after that, yes a million times.” You laugh and wrap your arms around him into a big loving hug.

Jaemin feels right at home. All the long years of living carelessly and wild, he’s finally found someone worth the extra mile. While Jaemin was a thriving adventure to be explored, you were his comfort to run back to.

It is through the intimacy of your backseat chronicles that Jaemin was able to fall deeper for you. You’re his lucky charm, for some reason, he always feels better around you. 

[dirtyoatmeall]

Good for you

A/N: Wow sorry I've been gone!! I suddenly got back into reading and suddenly found myself in the middle of multiple series! anywayz, I finally listened to Olivia Rodrigo's new album so here is a songfic for good for u. I ended up going in a completely different direction than I had in mind. It's also long as fuck. I proof scanned it, but it's like 18 pages, as always sorry for the incorrect grammar, I do what I want. Call me Maybe will be getting one soon as well :)

Pairing: ex!Kageyama x reader, foreshadowed Atsumu x reader

Genre: angst? hurt/comfort? Its sad for pretty much most of it.

Word Count: 10.3k (im so sorry)

Warnings: Mentions of alcohol and drinking, implied adult themes, all characters are 21+ !!, detailed breakup. 16+ only por favor

Well, good for you, I guess you moved on really easily. You found a new girl and it only took a couple weeks.

Your phone chimed, alerting you of a new text, you reached for it on the side table, pausing the movie you were watching. It was a message from Shoyo and an image: ‘I’m sorry, I figured it’d be better if I told you instead of finding out on Twitter.’ Your brow pinched, what could that mean? You unlocked your phone to open the text.

The pinch deepens as you zoom in on the picture, eyes beginning to prickle with tears. It was a photo- most likely taken by a fan or paparazzi- of Tobio, your boy-, ex-boyfriend. He was with a woman, she seemed slightly familiar, probably a model or something along those lines. Your face heated and shame burned in your chest, the embrace they were in looked so intimate; private, that it seemed wrong to look. You deleted the image and left Shoyo on read for now; you’d reply when you’re in a better headspace.

It had only been a couple of weeks and he had already moved on, meanwhile, you were just starting to not cry at the little reminders of him scattered about your apartment. He hadn’t even come to get his stuff. You sniffle and walk over to the wall to your left; the picture wall- and gently take one of the photos off, smiling faintly at the memory it brings to the surface.

Remember when you said that you wanted to give me the world?

The sun filtered through the blinds, casting a soft glow around the room. Groaning, you squint at the brightness before rolling over. Your eyes find blue ones, startling you slightly. He chuckles softly, voice deep and gravelly with sleep; sending heat through your body. “you’re so jumpy in the morning.” he whispered in the otherwise empty apartment.

You roll your eyes and let him pull you into his chest, listening to his heartbeat and his fingers traced lazy shapes into your hip. “Shut up, you know it takes me a day or two to adjust after you’ve been gone.”

You meant for the words to be light; not expecting the emotion you heard behind them. He sighs, arm winding tighter around your waist as he kisses the top of your head. You bring your head up to meet his gaze and shift in his arms, frown tugging on your lips. “’m sorry, I didn’t mean to ruin the mood.”

He sighs again, shaking his head softly. “You don’t have to apologize for anything, I should, for never being home, missing holidays and-“ You put a hand against his lips silencing him, brows drawn tightly together.

“You don’t have anything to apologize for either. I knew what I was getting into when we got together, it didn’t bother me in school and it doesn’t bother me now. I’d much rather you live out your dream than being stuck here with me all the time.” You feel his mouth open to object, but your hand stays firm. “I’m serious Tobio, I mean every word.” He nods against your hand and you release him. You flush slightly at the open emotion in his gaze. He pulls you into a kiss, murmuring against your lips. “I don’t know how I got so lucky with you, I promise I’m gonna give you the world.”

And good for you, I guess that you've been workin' on yourself. I guess that therapist I found for you, she really helped

A few days later you meet Shoyo for lunch, a new onigiri place where he apparently knows the owner. He sighs as he sets down his menu, your eyes snapping back your own, pretending like you’ve been mulling it over this whole time. “Alright, go ahead and ask.”

You look up from your menu, feigning innocence. “Hm? Sorry I wasn’t paying attention.” He rolls his eyes and raises an eyebrow. You hold his gaze for a few moments before your shoulders sag in defeat. Your eyes fall to the table as you pick at the corner of the laminated menu. He gives you a minute to collect your thoughts before he places his hand atop yours, a sad smile gracing his features.

“(Y/N), it’s normal to want to know how he’s doing.” You chew your lip and mumble, “Well he’s obviously doing good since he already moved on.”

He continues as if you hadn’t spoken. “He started going to that therapist you recommended a day or so after,” he pauses, trying to gauge where your mind is. You’re meeting his gaze, and he can see you got what he was implying so he continued. “He’s been going consistently; says it’s really helped him.” You nod, blocking out his next words; too busy thinking about how you’re going to find a new therapist.

Now you can be a better man for your brand new girl

As you eat, you think over his words. You swallow and take a deep breath, trying to instil confidence in yourself. “Are they… good together?” Your voice comes out softer than intended and you inwardly cringe. He smiles faintly and nods. “They are.” You nod in understanding and turn your focus back to your meal.

Well, good for you. You look happy and healthy, not me-If you ever cared to ask

You knew it was inevitable, your apartments aren’t that far apart, you just wished it wasn’t so soon.

You were grocery shopping for the week, trying to figure out how many oranges to get before settling on 4 with a sigh, you toss them into your cart, turning around to see blue eyes at the other end.

You inhale sharply, your gazes met and he was too close for you to run away, leaving only one option. You were suddenly glad you met Shoyo for breakfast this morning, you were dressed up a bit, but you weren’t so glad when you became queasy. He opened his mouth to say something, but stopped, letting it fall shut. You feel your face flush with heat and you duck your head, mumbling a soft “sorry!” and move to continue down the aisle, hoping he’d let you go.

Those hopes were crushed with the hand that gently captured your elbow, halting your escape as he turned you to face him. You were silent for a moment before he realized he was still gripping your elbow, dropping his hand to his side. You crossed your arms around your middle, trying to look- be smaller, small enough to get away. Though the rational side of you knew it wouldn’t happen, that you’ve known each other too long to simply stop. So you raised your gaze, uncurling your arms and bringing your shoulders back to at least look the part of an old friend caught by surprise, smiling as you spoke.

“Oh, Kageyama! I didn’t see you there, how are you?” He cringed ever so slightly at the use of his last name, filling you with a sick sense of pride that weighed uncomfortably in your chest. He opened his mouth to speak but was interrupted by a brunette coming up to him, not noticing you as she surveyed the list in her hand.

“Babe, did you find the oranges? Oh, remind me to pick up my birth control at the phar-“ Her eyes widened as she noticed you; cheeks flushing slightly in embarrassment. Unfazed, Kageyama snorted softly, wrapping an arm around her waist before turning back to you. “This is Yumi, babe, this is (Y-) uh, (L/N).” You smiled and waved, which she mirrored, going to speak but instead was interrupted by you, who had decided to spare all of you of the awkwardness of prolonging the conversation. “It’s nice meeting you Yumi, and it was nice seeing you Kageyama, but I gotta run.”

They nodded and waved in farewell as you continued down the aisle, letting out a deep breath before heading into the next aisle. You needed more alcohol.

Good for you. You're doin' great out there without me, baby. God, I wish that I could do that.

You saw them a few more times during your shopping trip. You had wanted to leave right away, but you had been putting off groceries for too long, and leaving your cabinets and fridge almost barren. Thankfully they were always far enough where if you accidentally made eye contact a smile in passing was warranted enough.

As you contemplated between mini pizzas or a large pizza, you heard a loud giggle from further down the aisle. Your head turned towards the noise instinctively and you saw them at the end, near the ice cream, which you hoped they moved soon because that was next on your list. They were laughing, her arms around his waist as she looked up at him, he had an arm around her, resting on her hip as he met her gaze and you felt your chest tighten and an emotion you definitely did not want to name and wanted to shove down, down far enough to forget it. They looked the part of smitten lovers, and you decided you didn’t need ice cream all that bad and grabbed the mini pizzas before heading to checkout, continuing to ignore the emotion swelling, weighing down your chest and moving up to your throat.

I've lost my mind, I've spent the night cryin' on the floor of my bathroom

You took a deep, shuddering breath that broke halfway into a gasping sob. The emotion was suffocating, burning in the back of your throat and pulsing against your skull as you hugged your knees to your chest, the cold press of the tub against your back doing nothing. You tried to take a breath again but your chest was too tight, it was constricting your lungs, pushing hot tears down your cheeks and pulsing harder as with the ringing in your ears.

You could faintly comprehend the door to the bathroom opening, but didn’t look up as someone wrapped their arms around you, pulling you to them; the feel of fabric twisting in your grasp somewhat grounding as they smoothed down your hair, their words muffled under the ringing. You couldn’t think about the tears and who knows what else dampened their shirt, couldn’t think of anything except the emotion weighing so heavy in your chest you were positive it was going to break your ribs, break through you and continue down, down, deep underground.

You have no clue how long you were there with them, not even sure how long before they arrived. They shifted their arms to pick you up, and you let them, not even moving your hands from their place on the shirt, you were sure they were glued there, the tears acting as an adhesive. Sobs still racked your frame as you were set down, tucked under the covers of your bed before the person laid next to you, resuming their soothing touches as the weight in your chest slowly lightened, gradually releasing its grip on your lungs as the ringing quieted, allowing you to hear the slew of soothing words softly coming from the person next to you.

But as the emotion lessened its grip on you, tiredness swiftly replaced it, the pounding at your temples only encouraging the darkness to weigh you down, until it settled over you like a blanket, your fingers laxing enough for them to fall back to your side. Your breathing slowed, the occasional hiccup breaking the silence as you slept.

But you’re so unaffected, I really don’t get it, but I guess good for you

Shoyo let out a deep breath as he gently shut the door to your bedroom behind him, shoulders slumping with exhaustion when he heard the latch click. He dragged a hand down his face, combing his fingers through his hair as he went to your kitchen to finish putting away your groceries, throwing away what was defrosted before collapsing on your couch, pulling out his phone, debating whether or not to text the person likely responsible for your tears. Turns out he didn’t even have to, they had already called him and left a message about an hour ago, a little after Shoyo first got to your apartment. He brought the phone up to his ear as he pressed play.

“Hey, I ran into (Y/N) at the store today, you know I thought you might be right; that our friendship ended with the breakup, but it was like nothing had changed! She even met Yumi though Yumi didn’t notice at first and started talking about her birth control,” a laugh, “I don’t know why you were so worried, she seems perfectly fine. I was thinking about having a little get together in a few weeks, Yumi really wants to meet everyone from Karauno, you both should come! Oh one sec, what? Okay! Sorry, I gotta go, Bye.”

Shoyo slid down the couch slightly, groaning as he pinched the bridge of his nose. Really? He was glad you stocked up on alcohol at the store because after hearing that, he needed a drink.

Well, good for you, I guess you're gettin' everything you want. You bought a new car and your career's really takin' off.

Two weeks later you sat on your couch, eyes focused on the match televised. You tell yourself you’re watching the tournament to see who Shoyo will end up going against; if you can give them any pointers, though a part of you knows it’s a lie.

At the end of the match, the Adlers, no, To- Kageyama, had scored the winning point, securing a spot in the semi-finals. You lifted the remote to change the channel, but you froze as the camera zoomed in on the edge of the court, where you watched Yumi jump into his arms, he threw his head back laughing as he spun her around before kissing her. You could hear the commentators discussing the game after making a cheeky comment but you tuned it out. You watched them walk off the court, snapping out of the trace as soon as the camera cut to the other team. You quickly turned it off. Taking a deep breath in your silent apartment.

You were going through your Instagram feed when you came across a post from Tobio. It was him and Yumi in front of a new car, kissing. You noticed it had multiple pictures, and swiped through, all of them of the couple. The last one was the most recent, earlier today, in fact, you recognized the jersey of the other team in the background. You part of the caption, deciding to scroll past before scrolling back up to read the long paragraph that was pretty much a love letter to Yumi. You bit your lip and liked it, cursing afterwards, you didn’t want him to know you still followed him. You debated unfollowing but decided against it, it’d only look weirder if you had liked a post and weren’t following him. You couldn’t get his expression out of your head, he looked so happy.

It's like we never even happened. Baby, what the fuck is up with that?

Over the next few days you received multiple texts from Kageyama, updates on his family; that they were asking about you, wanting you to visit, an invitation to a small gathering they were having next week, Tsukishima, Yamaguchi and Yachi were in town and he wanted to introduce Yumi to everyone. And several attempts to start a conversation.

You replied to all of them, thanking him for the update, politely declining the invitation; using work as an excuse, and you halfheartedly tried to keep up with the conversations until it got to be too much. It was like nothing happened, like he hadn’t suddenly broken up with you, after almost 7 years together. There were times you wanted to remind him, but decided against it. You didn’t want to be the bitter ex, you wanted to move on, like he had.

And good for you, it's like you never even met me

You think Shoyo had a talk with him.

After it all became too much, the media, the texts, the times he tried to call you, you told Shoyo. He was furious, ignoring your pleas to just leave it be as he left your apartment.

Later that night he came back, less angry and with takeout. When you had asked where he went he just smiled and told you not to worry about it. You watched movies the rest of the night. When you awoke the next morning there were no texts from Kageyama, and nothing on social media. Your nosiness got the best of you and you looked him up, only to furrow your brow as the results came up blank. You checked the other social media you had each other on and couldn’t find him anywhere. You didn’t dare text him, just in case, but it was obvious- he had blocked you, on everything.

There was an emotion curling in your chest, but you couldn’t quite name it. You didn’t know how to feel about it, so you stayed in bed for a few more hours before migrating to the couch. Shoyo didn’t come over that night, and you hated that you were slightly relieved.

Remember when you swore to God I was the only person who ever got you?

You sighed, still slightly out of breath and damp with sweat, snuggling into the body next to you regardless, smile stretching your lips. He tightened his arm around your waist, petting your hair as he shifted onto his side, bringing you closer and tangling your legs together. You wrapped your arms around his neck loosely, softly kissing his throat, right below his adam's apple before resting your face against his collarbone. He shuddered and drew you impossibly closer. “I know I don’t say it as often as I should, but I love you (Y/N), so much. I swear sometimes I feel like you’re the only person in the world who understands me. Ugh, that sounded so cliché.” You snorted as he slightly shook with laughter. “I love you too Tobio.” You brought your head up for a tender kiss before the two of you settled into a peaceful slumber.

Well, screw that, and screw you. You will never have to hurt the way you know that I do

You awoke the following morning with a hollow ache in your chest, your eyes burned but nothing came. You don’t know if it was good that the tears never came, but the hollowness settled heavily in you, it seemed to be all around you, weighing down the air equally. You were on autopilot the whole day, not fully there.

You blinked at the chime from your phone and raised your brows at the time, and your eyes widened at the name in your notifications. You quickly opened the text and looked at the image 2,3,5 times. It was a selfie, only the top part of Yumi’s face was visible, she must’ve been taking it, having to have it out enough to get Kageyama and all of his family in the frame, everyone smiling brightly. The typing bubble popped up for a few seconds before it disappeared and was replaced by a small message. You read it over and over before biting your lower lip. This is when the tears would normally come, when they’d be expected and yet they didn't. The burn was there, the lump in your throat but nothing else except the hollow pulsed in your chest. You didn’t think that was a good sign.

From Tobio:

We miss you! The kids keep asking when you’re going to come to play again. We love you, and you’re always welcome to visit. -Miwa~

Well, good for you. You look happy and healthy, not me if you ever cared to ask

You decided not to tell Shoyo about the picture, after all, it was his sister who sent it. He sent an apology the next day and you quickly dismissed it, asking him to tell her thanks and to tell everyone hello for you and that you hoped they had a great trip.

He unblocked you later that day. You assumed it was because of your text, he probably thought everything was fine now, that little bump in the road passed and things were back to normal again. And you tried, you tried so hard to go back to the person you were before. Fake it ‘till you make it was something you lived by, and you certainly were doing a great job faking it, but the ache in your chest told you that you hadn’t made it yet.

Good for you, You're doin' great out there without me, baby

You always kept up with the volleyball news and media, now for just Shoyo, but it was impossible to not see Adlers updates, and as MSBY’s rival you felt you needed to keep up. They were a force to be reckoned with, win after win; tournament after tournament they were at the top, MSBY one of the few to keep up. You sent him a congratulatory text after his last win, if he didn’t want to leave your friendship then you’ll try your hardest not to either, even if it hurts.

God, I wish that I could do that

Well, that lasted about 2 weeks. It’d been about 2 months since Kageyama broke up with you. You texted occasionally, most of them short conversations. They used to be longer, but you knew that to really get over him, you couldn’t be his best friend like before, you had to distance yourself. Shoyo wanted you to block him, even if just for a few more months, so you can move on quicker, but you disagreed. Your lives were so intertwined it wasn’t possible to not see him or hear about him at least once a week, usually in the form of sports journalism.

You laughed at Tsukishima’s joke, choking on the margarita you were in the middle of drinking, causing the others to laugh at you. Everyone was miraculously in town this week and demanded that you all hang out all week. Yachi stayed at Hinata's apartment since he had a roommate, and Tsukishima and Yamaguchi stayed at yours, though everyone decided to congregate at your apartment, the former two falling asleep on your couch and after the third night in a row, you convinced them to just stay. Hinata packed a bag and slept on your futon, Yachi slept in your bed with you, and the last two shared your guest bedroom.

While they all swore it was a mere coincidence everyone was in town, you had a strong theory that Hinata invited everyone down to stay with you, since in 3 days was what would’ve been your 7 year anniversary with Kageyama. They did their best to keep you distracted, going out to clubs, having movie marathons and game nights that lasted until dawn. You were filled with immense gratitude for that, and you made sure to let them know it. You were glad your little group was able to stick together, even if the shadow of the empty seat at the table grows with each passing day.

I've lost my mind, I've spent the night cryin' on the floor of my bathroom

You almost made it. Everyone stayed in today, keeping a careful eye on you all morning, until you got a call from your mother. Your parents lived in the countryside, they didn’t have great reception out there, even if they did they’d keep the single landline they have now. They called every so often, for holidays or updates on health and family members. The last time you talked to them was about 6 months ago. You head into your bedroom before you answer, a little worried about what might be going on, you knew your father’s health was declining, could something have happened? You took a deep breath and accepted the call, bringing your phone to your ear. “Hello? Mom?”

It takes a second before she replies, probably trying to get your father to stand next to her. “(Y/N) sweetie, sorry it’s been so long, it’s been busy down here and since your father can’t do a whole lot anymore, it’s been taking longer to keep the farm in shape.” You can hear your father grumble something in the background and you can imagine your mother rolling her eyes.

“Nevermind that! We were calling to congratulate you and Tobio on your anniversary, that’s today right? 7 years, I hope you know how lucky you are dear, these days relationships just aren’t lasting like they used to, but I’ve always known you two would stick through, I still do. Hopefully one of these days I’ll get a call about a ring? Or maybe some grandbabies?” She giggled on the other end, going on to talk about her and your father’s relationship, not paying attention to if you’ve replied or not, and you haven’t, you’re- you’re- you jolt out of whatever trance you were in to find yourself on your bathroom floor, back against the tub, your mother still chattering away in your ear, though you can’t hear her.

She’s right. Today is- would’ve, been 7 years. A flurry of emotions roars to life in your chest and you feel the familiar burning and grip start to take hold. You clear your throat, interrupting her story.

“Uh mom, me and Tobio aren’t together anymore. I’m sorry, I meant to call earlier, but there’s a lot going on. I actually have to go, I promise I’ll call later okay? I might be able to get away from work in a few weeks to visit. Love you.”

You ended the call, guilt joining the mix, you had completely forgotten to tell your mother, her words stirring the pot of emotions and memories in your gut as they rose into your chest, filling your lungs, spilling into your throat into your nasal cavity, behind your eyes and into your skull. You slackened your hold on your phone, and it tumbled onto the tile. You choked against the burning in your throat, pressing your palms into your eyes, trying- uselessly- to stop the slideshow of memories.

He had been your best friend, your longest crush, your first- well, everything. You truly thought you would be spending the rest of your life with him, travelling the world as he plays volleyball, eventually settling down and buying a house somewhere, anywhere. Marriage, a cat, maybe a dog, and kids. You never once thought the father of your future children would be anyone but Kageyama Tobio. Apparently, he thought differently. Against your will, the night he ended everything played back in your vision.

You heard the door close as you finished up dinner, a smile stretching wide on your face as you imagined his reaction. You spent the week learning how to make this dish, an old family recipe from his grandmother that he apparently adored and ate every time he visited home without fail. After years of watching her make it, you’d think you would have a good idea of how but you were naïve to think so. You finish plating the dishes and setting up the table, brows pinched in confusion, he hadn’t come to greet you yet, which he always does. You shrug it off, he might’ve had a tiring practice, hopefully the food makes up for it.

You pad down the hallway, thinking he jumped straight in the shower. You stop in the doorway of your shared bedroom; He was sitting on the edge of the bed, head in his hands as his elbows dig into his knees. Worry and confusion rose; what was wrong? Was practice that bad? You don’t try to mask your steps towards him, though he flinches all the same when you lay a hand on his shoulder, quickly withdrawing it. You sink to your knees in front of him, gingerly holding his wrists as you speak softly.

“Hey babe, what’s wrong? Did you have a bad practice? Why don’t you tell me about it over dinner, I got everything at the table.” He sighed deeply, sagging further, like the weight of the world weighed down on him. Your concern grew and you squeezed his wrists in a silent question. He took a deep breath and sat up, you let your hands fall away but he caught them, cradling them in his grasp, pity and guilt swirling in his glassy gaze as it met yours.

You sat up on your knees, why in the world would he look at you like that? “Tobio? What’s wrong, baby you have to tell me so I can help, you gotta let me in.” You were pleading at this point. He so rarely showed this much sadness, you were sick with worry, mind going to the worst-case scenario. He squeezes your hands, bringing them up to his lips. He keeps them there for a moment, his eyes shut, brow drawn tight.

He brings them back down to his lap and lets out another sigh, meeting your gaze again. You can see the conflict on his features bright as day. “(Y/N), I’ve been so lucky to have you in my life, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to pay back what you’ve given me. I’m truly, truly grateful and you've been one of my longest friends, one of my best friends. Which is why- why-“

He lets out a shuddering breath gaze dropping, tightening his grip around your hands. Your brow is pinched deeply, eyes searching his features for any sign of what could be going on. He takes a breath, trying to calm himself before continuing, and when he meets your gaze you no longer see the guilt, you see a wall you worked so hard to bring down. You open your mouth to speak, but he cuts you off. “You are one of the most important people in my life, which is why I have to do this. I can’t keep doing this, prolonging the inevitable only makes it more painful and the last thing I want to do is hurt you. But, (Y/N) I can't keep this up any longer, I thought- I thought it might pass, if I kept going along, pretending like everything is fine, when it’s not.” Your heart drops, no, it can’t be, what does he mean?.

“Everything is fine Tobio, what are you talking about? What are you saying, I-I don’t understand.” The emotion thickens your voice and his face falls as he sees the tears gather in your eyes. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, I loved you so, so much. I promise, I loved you more than anything, so much it hurt.” The tears are escaping both your eyes. You want to get out of his grasp but his hands only tighten around yours, like a lifeline. You suppress a sob bubbling up to speak, the world tumbling softly from your quivering lips. “Did?”

A hand touching your shoulder tears you from the memory. You’re aware of the hot tears streaming down your face, of the tight sobs wracking your frame, ripping from your throat against your will. You feel hollow, the ache grows and pulses until it’s all you feel, grief rising to meet it. You blink the tears away, to look around the room, you hadn’t recognized it right away, still disoriented from the memory. You see your friends, concern and in some cases, anger, in their gaze as they hover. You were surprised to find Tsukishima was the one at your side, the one who had pulled you from the memory turned nightmare. Your lip wobbles and he pulls you into his arms, embracing you as you cry into his sweatshirt, much like you had to Hinata weeks ago.

You’re vaguely aware of hushed voices around you, the rumble of Tsukishima’s voice oddly soothes you. You can hear Shoyo behind you, you think you hear him say your mother’s name, was she calling again? The thought slips from your mind as quickly as it came. You sat in your bathroom for who knows how long, crying in Tsukishima’s arms, surrounded by your friends.

But you're so unaffected, I really don't get it but I guess good for you

Later that night, when everyone has finally passed out, you slip through your apartment door, pulling your hood up as you head towards the street. You have your phone, keys and pepper spray. You just wanted- no, needed to get out of there, the slight chill in the air rousing you. You take in the surroundings, letting your feet take you wherever they please.

You sigh as you take in the park in front of you. You used to come here a lot, whenever you needed to clear your head. It was a space for you to be truly alone to work out your emotions. Which is exactly what you needed now. You smile faintly as you reminisce, not paying attention as you head to the swings, only to stop in your tracks, still hidden in the shade as you watch on. What the fuck.

The creak of the swings is drowned out by laughter, two people sit on the swings, legs pumping to go higher and higher. Her hair whips in the wind and she closes her eyes, leaning back for a moment. You watch him slow down, eventually stopping and getting up to approach her flying form. Right when she is about to pass him, he moves, grabbing her and the swing, halting them mid-swing. She squeals, which quickly melts into laughter as she lets go of the chains, wrapping her legs around his torso and her arms around his neck. Her smile is a sun in the night, love radiating from the couple as they kiss. You look away and spot an open picnic basket, a bottle of wine poking through on a blanket rumpled from use.

You leave as silently as you came.

Maybe I'm too emotional but your apathy's like a wound in salt

The hollow ache starts to burn as you walk back to your apartment. You didn’t expect him to be as affected tonight as you were but you thought he’d- what did you think he’d feel? Mourning? Grief? Sadness? Why would he? He was the one who broke it off, who ‘fell out of love’ or at least that’s what he said when he broke your heart. And to bring her there?

Maybe I'm too emotional Or maybe you never cared at all

You shared that spot with him a year after you moved in together, he knew its significance to you, to your relationship. How long had he been bringing her there? What did he tell her about it? Did he use the words you said to him all those years ago? You wondered if he even remembered what today was. He said he had loved you, but was he truthful? He promised quite a few things during your relationship that were broken when he admitted it, when he confessed ‘what had been eating him up inside.’

Maybe I'm too emotional but your apathy's like a wound in salt

The hollow was slowly filling, bitter, anger, loss, and more flooded the space as you recalled his words that night.

“I can’t do this anymore.” You had never felt more dread than in that moment.

“I loved you so, so much.” You had wished the past tense was a mistake, but you knew it wasn’t.

“I don’t know when it happened, if it was slowly or quickly.” You could tell it was a lie.

“I-I just realized I loved you in a different way than you loved me.” A cute way of saying he no longer loved you.

“I thought that if I just stuck with it, that it might change, that it was just a slump.” Another way to say ‘leading you on because I was too afraid to tell you the truth.’

“I tried, I tried so hard to love you the way you wanted me to.” For how long? How many years did he lead you on, how long did he let you think everything was ok?

“You deserve more than I can offer.” You knew that was true, you did deserve more. You deserved a lot more than this, than an offer.

Maybe I'm too emotional Or maybe you never cared at all

You were crying by the time you got to your apartment building, but it was different. You didn’t feel the aching hollow as strongly as before. You felt anger, bitterness about what he said, you had a million things you wanted to say to him, to make him know what he did. But didn’t he already know? He was there, he saw what his words did, he saw the aftermath, at the very least he heard about it. And yet the night after he was pictured entering a popular high-end club. It was on your Twitter feed that morning, effectively pouring salt and lemon into the hole in your heart. You had thought it then, and you’re thinking it now.

Well, good for you. You look happy and healthy, not me If you ever cared to ask

The next morning, no one brought up last night, and you were thankful for it. You think they could sense the shift, from the aching despair to the brittle anger. So you all lounged on the couch, playing Mario Kart to help you channel it.

You were on the fourth stage of Grief according to Yamaguchi, who brought it up the following day over breakfast. He explained: Denial- which was during the breakup and right after, Depression- which came to fruition after you ran into them at the store, Bargaining- When you tried to go back to how it was before, trying to keep the friendship alive so you’d still have him around, Anger- which was now, when you realize that you wasted years of your life for someone who didn’t even love you and now they want to go back to friends, after they immediately get into a new relationship. The next step would be the final- Acceptance, when you would finally accept he was gone, when you could finally move on.

Good for you

After that night the change became more obvious. You weren’t hiding anymore, you would hold your head high and snap others off if they trod down the wrong path. You felt the hot anger slowly cool over time, as you continued to go out, to clubs, bars, parties Shoyo always invites you to but you always decline. You met his teammates, finally after too long.

He had dinner for you and the team at his apartment that he shares with one of the said teammates. You dressed up a little, enough for Shoyo to whistle when you showed him over facetime as you finished getting ready. You weren’t planning on going anywhere except your apartment after; there was just something about knowing you look good that does wonders to the confidence. You grin widely as he complains about not wanting to deal with his teammates crushing on you. You end the call when you get into your car, you were going to stop by the store to get something and then head over, despite his assurances no one else was bringing anything.

You purse your lips in thought as you surveyed the wine selection in front of you, bending slightly to read the label of one on a lower shelf. You didn’t realize you were taking up the aisle until someone cleared their throat behind you. You paid the little mind, murmuring an apology as you stepped to the side. You felt their presence next to you, and after a minute of them burning a hole through you with their gaze you turned towards them, lips pursed in annoyance rather than thought.

You're doin' great out there without me, baby, like a damn sociopath

The wide eyes of Kageyama Tobio meet yours as you study him for a moment before smiling. “Kageyama! Sorry, I didn’t realize I was taking up the whole aisle, you know me; always so indecisive.”

Your joke seems to snap him out of whatever train of thought he was in. He smiles and chuckles, turning to look at the wine in front of you. “What kind of an occasion is it?” He asks after a beat. “Oh Shoyo is introducing me to his teammates today, wine’s something people bring to dinners right?”

He smiles and nods before pointing out several bottles. “These would be appropriate, and Shoyo likes this brand.'' He plucks one from the shelf before presenting it to you. You smile and thank him, before parroting his question back to him. He turns back to the wine. “Uh, Yumi got a promotion and I’m surprising her with dinner with her coworkers.” You hum in thought before grabbing a wine off the shelf for him. “I think this would be a good one. It's white, so the stain won't be as bad and won’t stain her lips like a red would. It’s a dessert wine so even her younger colleagues should enjoy it. Oh, and tell her congrats for me.” He smiles and thanks you before you part.

You arrive right on time at Shoyo’s, the wine was well received and his teammates were great. They were everything he told you and more, you all got along great, especially you and Atsumu, he was Shoyos roommate and it was great to have another person to make fun of his horrible habits with, much to Shoyo’s dismay.

The dinner flies by, and eventually, you’re the last to leave. You wave to Atsumu before hugging Shoyo. “Thank’s Sho, for everything you’ve done for me these past 6 months. I love you.” He squeezes you tight, kissing the crown of your head before pulling away.“You don’t need to thank me (Y/N), I know you’d do the same. I love you too, drive safe.” You wave as you leave back to your apartment.

I've lost my mind, I've spent the night. Cryin' on the floor of my bathroom

The next 6 months fly by, and you spend more and more time with Shoyo and his team. Bokuto dubs you an honorary Jackal and you celebrate drinking until dawn, as a true Jackal would. You spend time with them individually, the gym with Bokuto, reality TV with Sakusa, movie nights with Shoyo, and all of the above with Atsumu, in addition to annoying his brother Osamu at his restaurant.

It hits you out of the blue. You had felt a little off all day, but you had chalked it up to the takeout you had last night. You glance at the calendar as you walk past, only to backtrack and look again, with wide eyes. Today marked a year since the breakup. It had taken you a long time to move on, but you were finally starting to feel yourself again, so why did your heart ache all of a sudden? Why did the burning rise in your throat, prickling the back of your eyes as you began to breathe faster, feeling the despair rise out of the depths to rip a sob from you lips? You try to stop, taking deep breaths, count five things in the room, but none of it works. It’s not as bad as the other times, but you feel shame crawling up to join, you were finally turning things around, how could you let it all go to waste?

You curl into yourself on the couch, blindly calling Shoyo to ask for his company, maybe he’d know, he helped you get this far, maybe he can make sure you don’t fall too far. You listen to the rings until you hear the click of an answered call, not even letting him speak before crying into the phone, asking him to be with you, help you understand. Half your words are unintelligible as you ramble on, not really listening to the other end until you think you hear him say he’s on his way, but he sounded odd, different. Had you interrupted him? Was he too busy? No, he would’ve told you and sent someone else, probably Yachi since she was the closest.

You quickly tire of trying to hold everything back, and let it wash over you, all the feelings from this past year rise up, poised to drown you, and you allow it, letting it crash down and wash over you. You let the sobs free themselves, somehow knowing it was the right thing. You give yourself to the despair, the anger, the loneliness.

You don’t hear the knocking at the door, or the sound of the door opening, too absorbed untangling the knot of emotions in your heart; until you feel the cushion next to you you sink with the weight of another person, and a hand gently rubs your back soothingly.

You lean into him, letting him pull you to him like many times before. He pulls you into his lap, curling an arm around your waist while the other hand cradles the back of your head, letting you sob into his shirt. You take a deep breath, letting his familiar scent calm you- wait.

You freeze and your stomach drops. It’s not Shoyo. They're bigger, enough to cradle you against their chest. They’re whispering soothing words into your hair, and you hear a familiar accent, leaning back quickly enough to send a wave of dizziness through you and you sway for a moment.

“Woah, what’s wrong?” Atsumu asks, moving his hands to your hip and back to steady you. Your wide eyes meet his and he tilts his head slightly in confusion. “(Y/N), hey sweetheart, you okay? Gave me quite the scare there earlier ya know?” You continue to stare at him until he waves a hand in front of your face, breaking whatever spell you were under.

You blink a few times, shaking your head slightly as the corner of his mouth quirked up. You look back at him, brows furrowed, cringing when you hear your voice, hoarse after however long of crying. “’Tsumu? What’re you doing here? Where’s Sho?” He raises an eyebrow at your question, lifting his hand to wipe a tear from your cheek.

“Whaddya mean? You called me cryin’ an’ askin’ me to come here to keep ya company. Speakin’ of, what in the world is wrong? What’s got you so sad sweetcheeks?” Your face heats at the nickname.

“Oh, ‘m sorry, I meant to call Sho, he knows; it’s- today is-” He embraces you as a fresh wave of tears springs from your eyes. You can hear the rumble of his chest as he speaks, breath fanning your ear. “It’s all ok, ya don’t haveta cry, I can call chibi if you want him instead of me, it's no prob-“ You shake your head, cutting him off.

“No, s’kay. Thanks for being here ‘Tsumu, sorry I pretty much threw myself into your lap when you sat down.” You rub an eye, feeling awfully close to a toddler. He chuckles and combs your hair back, tilting your chin up so you’re looking him in the eye. “No needta thank me doll, and I won’t object to a pretty thing like you throwing themselves into my lap, though I’d enjoy it more if you weren’t crying. Now, d’ya wanna tell me what made you cry a river in here. Or at least what I can do to help.”

You curl inward slightly, not sure how to explain your wants at this moment, the emotions tangling in your chest too raw to name. You use actions to express your needs as words continue to fail you. You shift in his lap, straddling him instead of the awkward side hug you were doing before. You break eye contact, looking anywhere but him, feeling awkward and exposed. He snorts softly and his hands run up your knees, palm flat against your thighs, up and over your hips to splay against your back, bringing you back to his chest. Your pals lay flat against his sides, sliding along his ribcage and then south, fisting the fabric against his lower back as you rested your cheek on his shoulder. You waited and waited but the tears didn’t come, you could feel the tear tracts cool on your cheeks, trying to put your feelings into words.

A shudder than through his body as he felt you sigh into his neck, arms wrapping tighter around you, pulling you closer, until you were flush against him. The minutes passed by as the two of you stayed wrapped around each other, you breathing the only sound in the apartment. You sighed again, pulling away from him slightly to lean back to look at him. He searched your face, taking in the emotions clouding your eyes, thumbs rubbing circles into your hips soothingly. You gave him a weary smile and took a deep breath, looking down at your hands as you spoke.

“I don’t know if Sho told you about this, but about 6 months before I met you guys I got out of a pretty serious relationship, I mean it was my first relationship and the breakup hit me really hard. The day of the dinner was one of the first times I had truly felt myself again.

“We got together in our first year of high school. We had been friends years before that. God, I had a crush on him for so long, I can’t remember anyone before that.” Your voice is whispy, reminiscing on a better time. “I wasn't a manager that first year, though I was around often enough that I helped where I could. I was at almost every practice, which is how I got acquainted with the other first years. He was still guarded and grumpy then, so I was friends with everyone first, and we all slowly warmed up to each other.

“When he asked me out at the end of the year, after saying goodbye to the third years, it just- it felt so right, like this is supposed to happen. I was a manager our last two years and by graduation the six of us were close. We managed to stay in touch and visit each other whenever possible. Sho had gone to travel, Kei to Sendai for school, Hitoka and Tadashi stayed for school before she went to Tokyo and he stayed in Miyagi. Tobio was picked up by the national team immediately after graduation, to play in Rio. I was accepted into a university in Osaka, and he moved in with me when he got back.” You ignored the way Atsumu’s hands tightened their grip when you said his name.

“It was perfect, we- we were doing fine, or at least I thought we were.” Your voice cracked and you took a shuddering breath before continuing. “He traveled between Tokyo and Osaka a lot and of course for games but it never bothered me, I knew what I was getting into. Eventually, Sho came back, and joined your team, moving into an apartment not far from ours. I was so happy.” You whispered the last sentence, afraid if you said it too loud it’d sound like a lie.

“I hadn’t noticed any changes, he didn’t seem withdrawn or unaffectionate, he was like he always was, until he wasn’t. He came home one night and said he didn’t love me like that anymore, that he couldn’t love me the way I loved him. He- he said he tried to, he said he tried for a long time, in case it was a slump but it wasn’t. And all-all I could think about was the way he said it, like he had been thinking about this for a long time, he looked so tired like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders as he told me the last who knows how long was a lie.

“He left and stayed at a teammate's house until he could get an apartment. He moved close by, I still don’t know why he didn’t move to Tokyo. Sho came and stayed with me for a few days, until I kicked him out so he could focus on the tournament that was coming up. He kept in touch with Tobio, and would update me when I asked.

“That was a year ago, and I know I should be over him, and I am, or I thought I was until I realized what today was and- and everything, all the emotions I had pushed down came back up, no longer letting me ignore them. All the grief and anger and insecurity kept rising and rising until I thought I was gonna drown. Which is when I called Sho, or at least I thought I did.” The corner of your mouth twitched into a small smile as you met his gaze.

But you're so unaffected, I really don't get it

“I- I think it would’ve been easier if he hurt too, if I saw that it affected him even half as much, because that would mean he had felt something, he had loved me at one point. And I don’t know, maybe he came to terms with it before he ended it, but seeing him with someone else, not even 3 weeks later just rubbed salt too deep into the wound that just seeing them happy together sent me into tears. When I ran into them days after I found out, when I saw with my own eyes how good he was, how happy he was without me; I don’t know how long I cried, but it was suffocating, it had such a tight grip on me I couldn’t breathe, I didn’t even realize Sho was there until he was hugging me.” You watched your tears fall onto your hands, leaving droplets on his pants. You took in a shuddering breath, suddenly meeting his gaze.

“I just- I don’t know what wrong with me, why can’t I let myself be happy?” Your voice cracked, and you brought a hand to your face, embarrassment simmering low in your gut. Atsumu gently pried your hand away from your face, replacing it with his own as he cupped your cheek. He wiped the tears that fell from your lashes with his thumb. He brought you forward to kiss the crown of your head before returning his gaze to you.

“Doll, look at me. There is nothing wrong with you, ya hear? Your heart was broken, it ain’t gonna fix itself in a day. You will be happy, I promise. Whenever we lose someone we love, a piece of us goes with them. He was sucha huge part of your life, I’d be more worried if you weren’t sad. I can’t say when, but one day you’ll notice it hurts less and less until you barely notice it. Until then you have me and everyone else to help you, so don’t hesitate to lean on us when you need to, got it?”

Your bottom lip wobbled and your eyes were glassy with tears yet again, though this time for a different reason. You threw your arms around his neck and crushed him into you as you cried his name. “I didn’t know you were such a softie! I bet no ones gonna believe me when I tell ���em.” He wrapped his arms around you again, you were so close you could feel his laughter in his chest. “Yeah, and I didn’t know ya were such a cry baby.” You snorted and pulled away, “That’s on you, I am a well-known cry baby.”

You matched his grin, feeling lighter. You pulled yourself off his lap, but he didn’t let you get very far, pulling you into his side, your legs thrown over his thighs as you turned on the TV. You ended up falling asleep on your couch together, your neck cramped and you found out you drool, but it was worth it.

But I guess good for you

The next few months went by relatively quickly. There were a few hiccups, mostly on holidays, but you listened to what Atsumu had told you and you leaned on your friends during those times. Speaking of Atsumu, while you two were close before, after that night you felt even closer. You found yourself at the apartment he shared with Shoyo more and more. You came to every MSBY game you could, usually helping Osamu run his booth.

When you weren’t with him, Atsumu would often find you helping his brother run orders at the restaurant; under the guise of an apology for annoying him so often, but both twins saw how happy you were when you were working. Eventually, Osamu just gave you a position there, because he didn’t want to get caught exploiting free labor, not because he liked you or anything, you were just as annoying as his brother- or so he says.

The blonde hadn’t noticed just how much time the two of you spent together until you went to visit Yachi in Tokyo for a week, and had odd chunks of time with nothing to do. It was confusing, and frankly off-putting how different it was when you weren’t around. Everyone noticed of course, and teased him for it, more the team than Osamu, because he couldn’t deny he missed you too.

Despite your protests that it was just a 2-hour train ride from Tokyo, and maybe another 10-minute ride to the stop near your apartment, Atsumu insisted on picking you up from the station during your call earlier. “ ‘M not taking no for an answer doll, I’m picking ya up.” You rolled your eyes at his stubbornness and sighed. “Fine, but I’m venoming you for the gas, no ifs ands or buts about it.” You smiled at the sound of his groan from the other line, good thing you were just as stubborn.

Well, good for you, I guess you moved on really easily

You were idly scrolling through your Instagram feed, about 10 minutes away from Osaka when you saw a glimpse of a ring, you scrolled back up and read the caption. ‘I’m the luckiest man in the world’ followed by a picture of what must’ve been Yumi’s hand, and adorned on her left ring finger was a large, and no doubt expensive, engagement ring. 6 months ago it would’ve summoned tears, but now you smile faintly, commenting your congratulations before scrolling past. Atsumu was right, eventually, it started to hurt less and less and now it was barely there.

You stood up when the announcement of your arrival in Osaka rang overhead, tucking your phone away and grabbing your bags to exit the train car. You immediately spotted your chauffeur, thanks mostly to the gaggle of young girls surrounding him as he laughed and signed autographs. You walked slowly, trying to buy time until they left but (un?)fortunately he spotted you. A wide grin stretched his features and you couldn’t help but reciprocate, lifting your hand in a small wave. He turned back to the girls and said something before breaking through, jogging towards you as you met him halfway.

You had an amused look on your face from his theatrics and the wide gazes of the girls he left behind. “Hey.” He said when he stopped in front of you. You snorted, “Hey.” He pouted at your tease, which only made it more funny, before rolling his eyes and taking some of your bags, giving you a pointed look when you tried to object. You huffed and walked next to him towards the exit.

You startled slightly when his arm wrapped around your waist, pulling you by your hip into his side. You looked up at him but he kept his gaze ahead, though you could see the slight flush to his cheeks and the slight twitch of a grin. You reciprocated, hooking your thumb through the belt loop by his hip as you kept your gaze ahead, his stare bringing a slight heat to your face.

He laughed lightly and you two continued out to his car where he tried to make you sit in the back seat because “ it’s not professional for a chauffeur to let their passenger sit up front.” You laughed before letting your face fall into a mock-serious stare and said “no.” in the best deadpan tone you could conjure up before climbing in.

You raised an eyebrow as you looked at him when he didn’t start the car. His hands were on the steering wheel and he was looking ahead in thought. “Atsumu?” He looked at you, smiling softly, still not saying anything. “Uhh you okay? Do I really need to sit in the back for you to be able to drive because-“ He laughed, waving your concerns off. “No, no, I’ll allow it this once. Sorry for spacin’ out, I’m happy yer home.” You looked at him incredulously, “ I was 2 hours away ‘tsumu.” You see a faint flush creep up his neck and he clears his throat, turning back to the wheel and turning on the car. ‘I know, I just missed ya ‘s all.”

You were just able to make out his dejected mumble, quietly huffing in amusement as you glanced down briefly before turning to look forward, biting back the smile at his flinch when you grabbed his hand, bringing it to your lap as you intertwined your fingers. “I missed you too, ya big softie.” Smiling, he squeezes your palm before focusing on the road, and you feel something stir, a bud sprouting from the once hollow place in your chest. It hasn’t bloomed yet, but you have a feeling it will soon.

[angstysebfan]

The Truth Will Set You Free- Part 5

Pairing: Bucky x Female Reader, Thor x Reader (other Avenger characters)

AU: Modern

Summary: You dated for two years, and thought he was the one for you. One day you came home and found him with someone else. After running away from you, you return home and found yourself in the arms of Thor. When Thor decides to introduce you to his friends at a dinner, you realize that there’s something familiar about the house you were visiting.

Warnings: implied cheating, language (not proofread)

--

You stare in disbelief at what Natasha just said to you. She looks at you, still nervous about your reaction. The fact that you have no reaction makes her gulp.

“Y/N, I know this is not what you expected, but it’s true. I am in love with you. I think I always have. You were my best friend, and somewhere along the line, I realized that I wanted to be more than your friend. But I swear I never meant to cause you pain or make you think that Bucky was cheating on you. It was a stupid mistake, and the blame lays all on me,” she said, tears starting to fall from her eyes.

You look at her and wonder if this is some kind of trick. “Tell me what happened that day. Then we will get back to... this,” you say looking at the floor.

Nat takes a deep breath and begins.

~Flashback~

Nat pulls up outside of your shared townhouse with Bucky. She sees that Bucky is working on his bike outside on the driveway. Natasha takes a deep breath and gets out of the car, heading toward the man.

“Hey Buck, is Y/N home?” she asks. Bucky is surprised to see Nat, but gives her a warm smile as he stands. 

“She had to work today, unfortunately. Ruined our plans for the weekend,” he says with a shrug. “She probably won’t be home until late.”

Tears spring to Nat’s eyes before she could stop them. Bucky is both shocked and slightly uncomfortable by the emotion of the woman in front of him. Natasha covers her face in her hands as she sobs. Bucky awkwardly walks up and hugs her.

“I’m sorry,” Nat says in between sobs.

Bucky says nothing as he lets Natasha cry. He is concerned, since Nat is usually stoic. She never liked to show emotion, except with Bruce, which is why they dated for so long. Maybe the break up was harder on her then she puts on.

“Do you want to come inside? I know I’m not Y/N, but I’m here if you need to talk,” Bucky says softly.

Nat says nothing, but nods her head. She follows Bucky into the house and the living room. Bucky looks at Nat concerned, and then realizes, he is shirtless. 

“Uh, give me a second, I’m going to put on a shirt,” he says.

Nat laughs, “Trust me, I’m not looking. It’s ok,” she says. 

Bucky laughs and decides that he will wait, since he is still feeling the heat from outside. His expression softens, “So what’s going on? Is this about the break up with Bruce?” he asks.

Nat sighs, contemplating whether she wants to tell him the secret she has been holding on to for so long. “It’s kinda about that, but it’s something more. I- I’ve been holding on to a secret from everyone, and I am terrified that when I say it, everyone will look at me differently,” she says.

Bucky furrows his brows, “You don’t have to be afraid to tell us. Especially Y/N, I mean she is your best friend,” he says.

Nat looks at Bucky, tears still in her eyes, “I’m in love with Y/N,” she says.

Bucky’s eyebrows shoot up to his hairline, “Wait, you’re in love with.... Y/N? You- you’re a lesbian?” he asks cautiously.

Nat nods her head and starts to sob again. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t be telling you this. She is your girlfriend. You bought a ring to propose, and now I am telling you that I am in love with her. Not that it matters because she doesn’t feel the same way, but I have been holding on to this for so long, that saying it out loud for someone else to hear is... I can’t even explain it,” she says through her tears.

Bucky says nothing, as he is still in shock at what Natasha just said. Natasha continues to sob, and finally Bucky snaps out of his thoughts and pulls her into a hug again. This only makes Nat cry harder as she continues to apologize. Finally after what feels like forever, Nat stops crying and actually falls asleep. Bucky moves her to be more comfortable on the couch and covers her with a blanket before retreating to his room.

He can’t believe what he just heard. I mean he always had a feeling that Nat played for the other team, which he is totally fine with. What he isn’t necessarily ok with is that Nat is in love with his girl. He sat on his bed, his mind reeling with this news. He wondered how you would react. You were a sweet person, so he was sure you would still accept your best friend. He figured he would leave Nat to sleep on the couch where you would find her when you got home. He would stay out of the way in your room and wait until everything was said and done. Before he knew it, his eyes started feeling heavy. He climbed into his bed, and fell fast asleep.

Nat woke up awhile later and realized that she was alone in your home. She got up in search of you or Bucky and quietly went to your bedroom. When she opened the door she say Bucky sleeping in the bed. She knew she should have left, but the idea of sneaking into your room to smell your scent on the pillow drove her to her next move. Before she knew it was in the bed next to Bucky, who continued to sleep, and laying on your pillow. She breathed in your scent and imagined that this was her bed with you, and before she knew it she fell back to sleep.

~End of Flashback~

You look at Natasha in shock. You honestly didn’t know what to do with this information. “So, what happened after I left? Because you two seem to continue with your lives like nothing ever happened,” you accused.

Bucky walks over and squats down next to you. “That is not true, at least not for me. I begged you to stop and listen to me. I chased you outside, begging on my hands and knees for you to stop and you just left. I was broken beyond repair. I called you, texted you, emailed you for a week with no response. When you drove away that night I kicked Natasha out and told her I never wanted to speak to her again. I was sure that this was just a plot to break us up so she could have you.”

“After I found out you were truly gone, I shut down. I took time off work, I didn’t talk to anyone, I just stayed here in bed looking at the ring I was going to give you, but now lost the chance to. Steve and Sam begged me to tell them what happened, but I didn’t want to out Nat like that. Even though I hated her at that point, I wasn’t going to do that,” Bucky said.

You stare at him, “But you’re friends now? And why didn’t you tell everyone else what happened? Why was I left to be the bad guy here?” you snapped at Nat.

“Y/N, I was scared! I know I was selfish and I should have said something, but I was terrified that I was going to lose the rest of my friends like I had just lost you,” Nat said.

You roll your eyes, “Oh please! You lost me because it looked like you were sleeping with my boyfriend, not because you are a lesbian and supposedly in love with me!” you screamed. 

You turned your eyes to Bucky you gave you pleading eyes, “I-I don’t know what to think here. I mean, you both kept a secret for 3 years from the rest of the group. You made me out to be the bad guy,” you said.

“I told Steve,” Bucky said. You and Nat both look at him in surprised. “I told Steve everything except Nat’s secret, after Nat came to apologize. I needed to tell someone because I was going crazy. I felt like I couldn’t breath. I told Steve to not say anything, even to Peggy because I thought Nat was going to tell. After a while, when she still didn’t tell, I should have said something, but the group has stopped asking about it,” he said. 

You stand up and start to pace around the room. “I don’t know what to think anymore,” you say more to yourself. You look at Nat, “I would have never judged you for who you are and your friends won’t either. You need to tell them the truth,” you say, making Nat nod surprised. 

You then look at Bucky, “I-I don’t know what to do. I-I need time to think. How do I know if this is even true. You both kept this secret for 3 years. I need to think,” you say before quickly rushing out of the door and away from them. 

As you run up the street toward the subway to go back to your apartment, you allow all the information you just heard settle. You were more confused as ever an a part of you wished that Thor never brought you to meet his friends today.

~~

Part 4 / Part 6

Ok. I know some emotions are high with some of my dedicated readers, and I love when that happens. I understand what everyone is saying with the fact that Bucky kept that secret so he must not care. I don’t personally think it’s that cut and dry. But that’s just me. This story has gone from mini-series to full blows series. We are going to get to the bottom of this shit show! Feedback is appreciated!

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[jae-daddy]

Play

im jaebum mini series 

one / two / three / four / five / six (final) masterlist 

pairing: jaebum x reader genre: friends, angst, jealousy plot: you and jaebum have been really great friends. things have been going smoothly because neither of you were in a real relationship, flings? sure, but girlfriends/boyfriends? no. so when Jaebum starts going out with Emma (a bitch), you can’t help but act out <3 a/n: I dont know why I do this to myself... hope y’all like it. this is written very casually. this one will be like six part absolute max. 

“Hey, you know this isn’t going to happen right?”

“Huh?”

“This,” he gestured to the two of you sitting in your dark room. The bed comfortable underneath you as you watched Tangled. You realised how you were leaning against him; your head on his shoulder, your side pressed against him. “This isn’t going to happen.”

“Yeah,” you blew out, making a comical face as you snorted. “Of course not.”

You leaned away from him slightly, straightening onto the pillows behind you instead. You stared at the screen, your cheeks burning, “That would be hilariously disgusting, honestly.”

Shit.

Shit.

“Excuse me,” you said once the movie ended. Before the dark-haired boy could reply you walked into your bathroom, closing the door behind you.

You caught yourself in the mirror. Your eyes wide, your hair a mess, and a face of a fucked up girl staring back at you.

“Shit!” You hissed, quietly, as you stared at yourself.

“Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit.” You repeated as you kicked the cabinet underneath the sink. You closed your eyes, running your hands through your hair. You kept out a quick breath, as you rested your hands on the bench.

You leaned in closer to the mirror as you stared into your eyes.

“You got this,” you spoke with resolution. “You’re going to go back in there and act like everything is normal.”

You took in your messed up hair and fixed it into place. You corrected yourself and checked in the mirror. You bit your lip as you gawked at the neckline of your t-shirt in contemplation.

“Fucks sake,” you muttered under your breath, tugging it down to reveal your bra strap. You check your hair once again, sighing deeply to calm yourself.

“Alright, let’s do this.” You walked out the door and into your dimly lit room.

You found your friend sitting on the bed where you had left him. He looked up from his phone, his lips quirking up as he rose his eyebrows, “Have a good piss?”

“Yup, I had been holding it the whole movie,” you replied, as you strolled over to the bed.

Maybe that was why Im Jaebum did not want to fuck you. You talked without a filter and had a grand total of freaking zero charm and wit that other girls had. For some reason when you hung out with Jaebum, you liked to talk and behave like a guy with a dick, instead of a girl who wanted to jump his bones.

You were the goddess of seduction, taking about holding in your piss. Who in their right mind would not want to bury their cock inside a pussy that had been holding its pee for a whole movie.

“We could’ve paused the movie,” Jaebum tsked, getting up to sit straight. The laptop slipped from his lap and onto the bed.

You paused and spun on your heels as you began walking towards the mini-fridge in your room. It wasn’t that you were rich. You had saved up to get this mini prize keeper, so the thieves you lived with didn’t steal your treasure.

“A drink, Jae?” You asked as you bent to open the fridge and grab a bottle for yourself.

“Yeah, why not,” he answered, and you grabbed his favourite. You turned, holding it up and he chuckled before staring at you with a smirk, “You have a problem, y/n.”

“What do you mean?” You frowned, skipping over before jumping onto the bed. You didn’t have a bed frame. You weren’t sure if it was because you were poor or if you liked the low-key fashionable homeless aesthetic.

Jaebum took the drink from you, sipping it as he stared at you over the bottle.

“It is a Wednesday night,” he smiled at you, those ridiculously cute little bumps appearing on his cheekbones as he teased, “and you’re drinking.”

“So? are you too,” You scowled.

“Yes, but that’s cause you offered.”

“Yeah, how is that any different?” Your frown deepened as you took a big gulp. You reached for the laptop bringing it onto your lap. You opened a new tab, “Lesbian or gay porn?”

“Y/n,” Jaebum warned. His voice light, a little stern.

You peeped over at him with a teasing smile. You rose an eyebrow holding back your growing grin, “Gang bang then?”

His eyes widened, with a warning.

“With animal suits on?” You gasped, beaming at him as he shook his head. “Now wouldn’t you say that’s a little too furry for a Wednesday night?”

“Shut up,” he closed the laptop, making you turn towards him. You rolled your eyes as you bought the bottle to your lips, chugging it.

“Hey, come on,” he took the bottle off you.

“Hey!” You whined, watching as he placed both your bottles on the floor behind him. He took your hands in his warm hands, and you felt an entire zoo go wild in your stomach.

How could he not realise what he does to you?

“Y/n, listen to me,” Jaebum sighed heavily. You studied his face and instantly looked away. He was terribly gorgeous, so attractive that it should be illegal.

And the way he was looking at you... How could he possibly say nothing could ever happen between you when he looks at you like that.

No one ever looked at anyone like that, not unless they wanted to fuck. Im Jaebum looked at you, properly, truly looked at you. He was looking at you with the presence of his mind, not just staring at you while his mind was elsewhere.

He was watching you, studying you.

You didn’t know if friends did that, especially ones you met a few years ago. It wasn’t just you who felt this energy between you. Everyone else watches the two of you too. Always monitoring for a change between the two of you, a classic would they- won’t they.

There were times when you were so close. There were times when you and him were a second away from finally getting rid of this stressful sexual tension between the two of you.

You glanced away from his eyes. You wouldn't be able to help yourself if you kept looking into those melting brown eyes, and those delicate lips.

You would end up kissing him and whose fault would that be? You would have no choice but to blame him and those beautiful brown eyes.

Jaebum tugged at your hand, making you look up at him. You sulked at him, letting him know you didn’t enjoy this. His eyes watched you, even in the dim fairy lights of your room, you could make out the golden streaks in them as if you had memorised the patterns they made.

You probably did. You were always looking into them, or thinking about them.

About him.

You gulped as his eyes darted down towards your lips for a split second.

“Y/n,” he spoke, his voice soft and serious.

“Jaebum,” you sang, trying to be clever when truly you were scared he’ll realise how sweaty your palms were getting.

“I can’t look after you forever.”

You nodded, snorting, “I don’t need you on my ass all day too, Jae.”

“I’m serious.”

“So am I,” you replied, holding his hand now. “I am a grown woman. I have a job and a degree and everything. The sixteen-year-old me would be crying if she saw me right now.”

“She’d be proud to see you live without a bed frame?” He rose an eyebrow.

“It’s a lifestyle choice.” You deadpanned, he bit his lip to hold back that betraying smirk.

“Alright, fine,” he sighed, he gazed down at you. His hands holding yours again, once again, he was holding power in the conversation. “You know we can’t always be like this, right?”

“Yeah, but that’s not happening anytime soon,” you snorted, you tried smiling but you couldn’t. Your smile weakened when you saw that look flash in his eyes.

Pity, it was fucking pity.

“Actually,” he started, and you wanted to stop him. You wanted to send him away before he began. “Emma and I have been getting serious now.”

“Hook up Emma?”

They had been hooking up for a few months now. It was causal, she was just the new flavour of the season. Or at least that’s what she was meant to be, but then she started showing up everywhere.

You open Jaebum’s car door to sit shotgun, she is sitting there. You go to Joanna’s for the weekly Friday nights, Emma is there. You make a plan to go hiking over the weekend, surprise, Emma has made herself available.

You wouldn’t have minded if she was nice, but she was an actual bitch. You saw the way she looked at you. You could see straight through the expression on her face as she kissed Jaebum, making sure you were watching.

His phone dinged beside him, and you could bet your firstborn it was her. You felt happy when Jaebum didn't reach for it instantly.

“She isn’t just a hookup,” Jaebum told you, his eyes holding yours. You felt your heart drop at his words. It hurt to see him so protective over someone else, so much that he spoke to you like that.

Jaebum never told you anything. He would tell you stuff, joke, talk, but he never told you something. He never corrected you off so seriously, not unless it was something important.

Seems like Emma unlocked a new level.

“Alright,” you replied soulless, as you took your hand out from his grasp. You pressed the nail of your middle finger into your thumb-pad to stop the prickling in your eyes. “Don’t get your panties in a twist.”

You both sat quietly for a few more seconds before you reached over him. You felt your chests press against his arm as you grabbed your bottle from his other side. You could’ve moved away, but you didn’t want to.

You felt his breath catch before he held it, exhaling it out softly. You felt its warmth brush against your neck, you wanted to feel it all over your body.

You straightened, downing the whole bottle as you held his gaze.

Jaebum gulped visibly before casting his eyes away. He reached for his own bottle taking a big swig, his eyes not looking at you.

“We’re together, y/n.”

You laughed.

“I’m sorry?” you chuckled, staring at him as if he was losing his marbles. She would eat him up alive, and then vomit it out and make him eat himself up. She would ruin him.

“Emma and I are in a relationship. She’s my girlfriend.”

“Girlfriend?” You laughed, your mind blanking. Your heart speeding up frantically as your body went into overdrive.

Stupid. This whole thing was stupid.

A fucking stupid shit show.

“What are you in fifth grade? Girlfriend?” You snickered at him. Jaebum only stared at you a frown on his face.

“Stop laughing at me.”

“I’m not laughing at you,” you tried to make it better but you couldn’t.

You were laughing at yourself. At how fucking stupid you were, at how you were having a literal mental breakdown right now.

“No, actually I am laughing at you.” You shrugged.

“Fuck you,” he groaned, staring at you with loathing.

“Oh, come on,” you hit his arm, playfully. You didn’t know what you were doing. You had absolutely no fucking idea what to do. What is one to do when their crush is going out with the spawn of the devil, and not even the hot kinda devil.

“No, fuck you, y/n,” he grunted, annoyed, as he watched you who was failing to stop laughing. You weren’t laughing because you wanted to, your body just didn’t know what else to do.

“I’m not laughing at you. I just don’t know how to process this.”

“There isn’t anything for you to process,” Jaebum grumbled, lifting his arms in confused defeat. “Just accept.”

“You don’t need any approval of mine, Jae,” you rolled your eyes as you got off the bed and walked towards the mini-fridge. You needed another drink, another lot more drinks. “You are just informing me, and you have. You know I don’t like her vibes.”

“Oh, stop with your witchy voodoo crap,” he groaned, and you could recognise him roll his eyes. You turned to ask him if he wanted another drink, he just shook his head.

“It’s not voodoo, I don’t chant any spells. Her energy is just off.”

“She’s great-”

“-at sucking dick.”

“Y/n,” he warned.

“Fine,” you gave in. Your phone dinged, and you reached over, smiling at the glowing screen.

Dickdown 9/10: You up?

Perfect.

“Are you staying?” You asked Jaebum, inspecting up when he didn’t reply.

You found him staring at you, and you rose an eyebrow, “What?”

“Who’s that?” He narrowed his eyes.

“It’s none of your business,” you smirked. You needed to fuck Im Jaebum out of your system. There was no way you were going to spend tonight sober, and drinking alone would be worse.

And spending the night with Jaebum would be just sad mostly.

“Are you kicking me out?” He smirked at you, teasing.

“Well, Emma isn’t here to kick me out, so...” you trailed off.

“Alright, fine,” he got grabbing his jacket. You watched as he put it on, before running his hands through his hair.

“Bye, Jae,” you whispered.

Jaebum looked down at you, his eyes soft as he sighed, “I wish you weren’t so much trouble, y/n.”

You didn't say anything and only smiled up at him.

“Goodbye, y/n,” Jaebum leaned down, kissing your forehead.

You watched him walk out of your room, the door closing behind him.

You let out a shaky breath as you wiped the tears that slipped from your eyes.

“Fucking hell,” you muttered before downing the second bottle.

You reached for your phone.

Get here in 15 mins.

Dickdown 9/10: Five ;)

[spinster-sisters]

Sunflower. LTY

Warnings: Face fucking mostly, a toxic as fuck relationship, swearing

A/N: THIS RELATIONSHIP IS TOXIC AF SO PLEASE DON’T THINK IM SAYING THIS IS OK OR THAT IM ROMANTISIZING THIS

also, guess which song this is based on lol

This is gonna b like a 3 part mini series so stay tuned

THIS IS A REPOST FROM MY OLD BLOG

You don’t know how the fuck you got here, standing outside the looming apartment building. It was going to rain soon, you could tell because not a star was visible in the night sky, covered by clouds. Distant thunder rumbled in the air. You told yourself never again, yet here you were.

It started almost a year ago,

You meet Taeyong in at a frat party. You hadn’t spoken much, both of you too drunk to care. It didn’t take long for you to take him home.

When you woke the next morning, your bed was empty, no note, no text, nothing. At the time you didn’t care, it was just a one night stand right?

Then, not even a week later it happened again, this time you were both completely sober, having spoken for almost an hour before, only this time you didn’t even make it out of the party before you found a closet for a quick fuck. Once again, total static after. After the fourth time, the man ghosted you, you told yourself no more. You had become somewhat invested in this man, each time believing you might have a future, only for him to disappear the next day. So you promised your self that it wouldn’t happen again.

It was only 2 weeks before the man had once again lured you into his bed. You didn’t mean to fall in love, you didn’t. You tried fucking around, just as he did. You tried blind dates and parties, and even binge drinking to try and keep your mind away from Taeyong. Yet every time, you would scramble to meet him, anytime, any place he desired. You were at his beck and call.

It got to the point were others knew not to even bother, you were Taeyong’s. No matter how much you flirted, how hot you looked, how desperate they were, no one dared to touch what Taeyong had successfully claimed. Even if he didn’t seem to need you.

He continued to sleep around as he pleased, going days without even texting you, then calling you at 2 am to come for a quick fuck. And every time you came running.

It was clear to everyone that to you, he was everything. But to him, you were nothing.

This reality hit you especially hard 3 weeks ago. He had been out with a girl, but she got to piss drunk before he could get his dick wet. And instead of jerking off he called you. You were there in 12 minutes. Though your time was cut short when he got a phone call, it was the girl from earlier, sobered up and ready for a good time.

He left before you had even got your clothes on.

That hit you hard. For 3 weeks you ignored his calls, for 3 weeks you avoided him at parties, for 3 weeks you were strong.  

Yet here you were, standing outside his apartment. The rain had just begun to fall. You were broken, you missed him, you wanted to see him, talk to him, feel him. He was like a drug or a god, in your eyes. You craved his attention, reveling in the few moments you had it. Those moments gave you a better high than any recreational substance ever could.

Which is why you are here, you are an addict going through withdrawals. And you needed your fix.

You walked up to the steps to the heavy metal door, and pressed the button next to his name, buzzing up to his apartment. You stood silent for a moment, wondering if he was even going to answer, it was nearly midnight.

“Hello?” Taeyong’s voice sounded over the intercom. Your heart cried out at the sound. It was pathetic really. You breath soon stopped though, you had no clue what to say. There was always a chance he would simply turn you away. You finally reached out a shaky finger, pressing down the button once again. A low buzzing sound told you he could hear you.

You were still at a loss for words. So you only squeaked out,

“Tae?”

Before releasing the button.

This seemed to be enough though, because soon a high pitch buzz rang out, signaling that the door was open. You heaved open the heavy metal door, before walking up the many flights of stairs to reach his apartment.

You stood outside his door for a minute, contemplating leaving. You had barely had the time to consider it before the door swung open.

And there he stood, in all his glory. A loss barely their white t hung off his slim frame, grey sweat pants loosely tied around his waist. The sight of him was enough to make your mouth run dry, you were practically gasping for water. You quickly swallowed in an attempt to fix the sensation, your heart racing for him.

He lifted the corner of his mouth into a slight smirk.

“Almost though you forgot which one it was,” He spoke, his voice deep and smooth enough to bring you to your knees. But in truth, he was almost mocking you with that statement. He knew as well as you did there was no way you could forget the way to him. You suppose that’s the reason your friends begged you to let him go, to ditch him completely. Because he knew how crazy you were for him, he knew you would come when he called, he knew the hold he had over you.

He chuckled at your slight pout, reaching out and grabbing your wrist, pulling you into his chest. You fell graciously into his arms, closing your eyes as his arms wrapped around your waist. You breathed in his sent, feeling your mind cloud over at the strong musk. Though your face was in his neck you sensed him moving close your ear, moving your hair out of the way with his nose.

“Miss me?” he whispered into the shell of your ear. You almost cried out to him, yes, yes you did miss him. But instead, you simply wrapped your arms around him and nodded into his shoulder. You finally saw his smirk when he pulled you back, admiring you at arm’s length. He looked up and down your body.  You blushed madly under his gaze.

Taeyong finally leads you inside, closing the door with a thud behind you, only to lean against the dining table, arms folded across his chest, now grinning wildly.

“What made you decide to come back to me, baby?” He asked, thought the sweetness in his voice didn’t reach his eyes, which showed how amused he was by your sudden appearance.

Something had happened, though you were reluctant to share. But it didn’t take much more of his intense gaze to have your resolve cracking.

“umm,” You began, not sure how much you wanted to share. “There was this guy” You eyed him, waiting for his reaction. He didn’t have one. “ Well, we were hanging out, and one thing leads to another,” You continued in a shaky voice, “ I hadn’t told him my name,” You explained, seeing how that was the only way any guy would be willing to risk sleeping with Taeyong’s girl. “But Tae it was-”

“Bad?” He filled in the blank. Still clearly finding the whole thing very amusing.

You swallowed again and nodded. At this, he audibly laughed.

“Well, what did you expect Y/N?” He chuckled out, pushing off the tabled and stalking towards you. “And I’m guessing you finally realized that no other guy can please you the way I do?” He asked mocking you slightly. You nodded again, shamefully.

“Did you finally realize how much you need me?” He asked, this time looking expectantly at you, waiting for an answer. You finally looked up to meet his dark swirling eyes. You had fallen in love with those eyes. You nodded, practically lunging froward to once again attach your self to him.

He chuckled at you once again, hand stroking down the length of your body, from the back of your neck to the swell of your ass.

“Show me how much you need me,” He orders in a soft voice leading you over to the couch. He was so fucking beautiful, your mind was clouded, practically drunk off his attention. You wanted to please him. Make him see how much you wanted him.

You knelt on the couch beside him, taking his hand into yours and raising his wrist to your lips. You trial your lips down the length of his arm savoring the way his soft skin felt against your lips.

Although you found him to be perfect in every way, Taeyong was not with his blemishes, one of these was how possessive he could be over you. While you often deluded yourself into thinking it was out of love, the truth was that Taeyong was greedy, and to put it simply, didn’t like to share toys.

So you continued to shower his body in affection. You moved yourself to straddle his lap, lips now reaching up to his shoulder, you hands skimmed underneath his shirt, tugging lightly, asking him to remove it. He obliged you, pulling the fabric over his head, his hands then resting on your hips, rubbing soft circles into your jeans.

Your lust had you practically drooling over the man in front of you. Just as you were about to dive back into to worshipping his golden skin, he reached up onto the hair at the base of your neck, taking a fist full into his hand by the roots, keeping your head immobile. He tugged at your hair, causing your head to fall back slightly, exposing your neck to the man. In your vulnerable state Taeyong tutted at you.

“So, this man,” He started, your blood ran cold “What was his name?”

Though the question was innocent, it held a deeper meaning.

“umm,?” You wondered aloud. Your mind was so swirled with thoughts of Taeyong, you honestly had a hard time recalling. His hand tapped your hip, telling to hurry up. Though just as he did so he also pulled out tighter onto his lap, bulge pressing into your core deliciously. You got lost in the feeling, starting to swirl and grind your hips absent mindedly

“Uhhh, I think it was-” You trailed off quietly, one good tug on your hair, reminding you of the question, “Umm- it was- I think I was Doyoung?” You wonder aloud. In reward for answering Taeyong began to grind up into you, matching your pace. The seam of your jeans was rubbing directly onto your clit, his hips swirling the bud onto the rough fabric. The outline of his cock was pressing perfectly on your slit, practically sliding between your folds through the fabric. You were already in pure bliss, happily chasing your high.

“Hmm,” He spoke aloud, almost casually as if he wasn’t one particularly strong thrust away from making you cum in your pants, which were already damp from your wetness.

“ You should know better than anyone, baby, how angry that makes me.” He adds, bringing a hand down to add pressure directly onto your clit, you cried out, picking up your pace.

“I think you need a reminder that your mine,” He comments. You were hanging off his every word, seconds away from release your stomach clenched in anticipation. You swirled your hips, once, twice, a third time. You were about to cum, hard, a fourth.

Taeyong quickly released your hair and took you by the hips, lifting you off of him. You nearly toppled over back onto him in shock. You stared at him, mouth agape and wide-eyed, a loud whimper ripping through your body. You were crying out for a release.

He laughed at you once again

“But first you need to thank me for letting you come up here after that stunt. Not listening to me for weeks? Ignoring me? You’ve been bad, baby” He practically spat at you as you collapsed onto the floor at his feet.

“Get over here and apologize.” He demanded, spreading his legs enough for you to sit comfortably between them. If you had thought for a moment you might have noticed the hypocrisy in his words, but you didn’t. Instead, you eagerly crawled into place. Mouth already hanging open, like an eager pet waiting to be fed.

Taeyong sat up straight, hand once again finding purchase in your hair while the other took his now fully erect dick out of his sweat pants. Your cunt throbbed in anticipation, mouth-watering at the sight. You straighten your back, leaning as far forward as the hand in your hair would allow.

“So eager, baby” He chuckled, before guiding your head onto his length. You happily let your jaw go slack as he guided your head up and down his cock. You loved him so much it hurt, so to you, his pleasure was worth the dull pain in the back of your throat. Though clearly, this was not enough, as soon he started thrusting into your mouth harshly. Tears began to stream down your cheeks as his throbbing dick moved down your throat. You choked and gagged frequently, trying your hardest to breathe through your nose.

“Hmm, such a good pretty baby,” He remarked, watching the drool that escaped your mouth drip down your chin. You looked up at him with big round eyes, causing him to groan. As his thrusts become more sporadic. He threw his head back, halting his movements. Soon, thick ropes of cum came pours down your throat. It was sticky and warm, already sliding down your throat. You had no choice but to swallow it, not that you minded.

You finally were released, pulling yourself off his dick. You were panting, throat feeling sore.

His hooded eyes watched you amusement still in his eyes.

“Oh, baby, you’ve always been so good for me,” He praised. “You’re never going to ignore me again are you?” He asked, as though talking to a child. You nodded in affirmation, completely, madly in love with the man before you.

Both of his hands reach out and cupped your face.

“Mine,” he said, more to himself than to you, as your eyes shown with adoration, practically sparkling with devotion.

I love you, I love you, I love you. You brain chanted over and over and over again. Staring longingly at his perfect face. It was as if a red glow surrounded him, everything aside from his figure was a blur, all you could see was Taeyong. You rested your cheek on his knee, eyes not leaving him.

Just as he was about to open his mouth a sudden ringing erupted from his phone. His eyes left your face. Hands leaving your head, and you felt a crash.

He reached forward without missing a beat, answering the phone on the second ring. Your head stopped spinning

“Hello” He spoke, voice clear and unbothered. The person on the other end talked for a moment before Taeyong responded,

“Of course,”

You came down from your high,

Without another word, he hung up the phone, stood abruptly, fixed his appearance, and walked out the front door.

Leaving you in a pile on his floor.

You were back where you started.

[malfoymanortings]

bad child

SUMMARY: Gwendolyn Weasley was the only one of her family to be sorted into Slytherin, and she becomes the black sheep of the family. her morals get twisted as she fights for her place in Slytherin house, but will she lose them completely?

PAIRINGS: none, eventual Draco X OC if continued.

hello! really im not sure if this is worth continuing, but it’s been floating around my mind for awhile so I decided to start writing it out. possibly will become a mini series if anyone wants it? enjoy!

Ginerva and Gwendolyn Weasley were the second set of twins to be born to the Weasley family. Their parents had been ecstatic to finally receive the girls they had so desperately wanted (more so Molly than Arthur), that it temporarily overshadowed the sheer panic of them having been twins. Twin girls.

Their first set of twins, Fred and George, had been more than several handfuls to deal with. If they weren’t lighting something on fire, they were terrorizing their easiest target, their youngest brother Ron.

The girls had proved to be just as difficult in their own way.

From a very early age Gwendolyn was able to convince Ginerva to do just about anything she said. Stealing from muggle shops, their siblings, neighbors; setting out more vindictive traps for the muggles around their neighborhood. The girls were close, but there was always the understanding between them that Gwendolyn was the leader out of the two. In addition to that, she was also the more manipulative and cunning of the two.

That’s not to say that Ginerva wasn’t strong in herself. She just loved her twin dearly, and was willing to put her own morals aside for the sake of keeping the peace with her twin. Gwendolyn had always felt that as the only girls, and the second set of twins, they needed to work hard to stand out and not let opportunities for power pass them by. Even if that power was only enjoying stolen bubble gum while their siblings had none.

Regardless of her questionable morals, Gwendolyn fiercely loved her family and had a conscience, contrary to what her older brother Percy seemed to think. She just cared more about what would be best for her and in turn, her twin, than how her actions would affect others. Gwendolyn would go to the ends of the earth to ensure Ginerva was okay.

By the time the girls had turned nine, their parents had come to realize that although Ginerva was normally at the forefront of the trouble they got into, Gwendolyn was the orchestrator of the scheme. No matter how many times Molly berated the girls for their wrongdoings, they didn’t stop. She spoke with Ginerva and told her she did not always have to go along with her sisters plans, and she spoke with Gwendolyn, telling her just because Ginerva was willing to do things for her didn’t mean she should.

Ginerva had tearfully said she would do better. Gwendolyn had laughed.

When the girls had finally headed off to Hogwarts, their mother had fretted and worried and bitten her nails as she sent them off, giving their older brothers firm instruction to watch over them. Percy had taken the suggestion to heart and swore he would, the twins had saluted their mother and laughed as they nodded, Ron had just shrugged noncommittally. Molly even requested that Harry and Hermione do their best to watch out for them, and the second years promised they would.

Ginerva was sorted first. The hat sat on her head for a few moments before loudly proclaiming “GRYFFINDOR!”. The redhead made her way over to the rest of her redheaded family, who hooted and hollered and made a ruckus as she blushed.

Gwendolyn was next. The hat sat on her head for a few beats longer than her twin, before proclaiming “SLYTHERIN!” just as loudly as it had for Ginvera. The redhead’s eyes widened for a moment, before she quickly fixed her expression into an indifferent mask and walked stiffly towards the green and silver table. Her family at the Gryffindor table had hesitated before clapping; Percy with an expression of horror, the twins with a disappointed grimace, Ron with a mix of concern and fear, and Ginerva with a look of crushed devastation. 

Gwendolyn didn’t spare a second glance towards her family as she set down tentatively at the Slytherin table, hearing murmured whispers coming from an already established friend group a few seats down from her. She had felt out of place without her twin next to her.

“I’m Astoria,” the brunette next to her greeted, holding out a hand for her to shake.

“Gwendolyn,” she replied, giving the other girl a firm shake. “You can call me Gwen.”

The brunette nodded and smiled, before turning her attention back to the sorting.

“Weasley, hm?” a voice drawled to her left, and she turned to see a boy with slicked back silver hair giving her a haughty once over. “I’ll have to let father know they let one of you in Slytherin. Surely the hat has made a mistake. A muggle loving blood traitor would never be allowed in Slytherin.”

Gwendolyn paused for a moment, her thoughts racing. She knew enough about Draco Malfoy to know his approval would make or break her acceptance into Slytherin house. She needed to earn his approval. She had to show him he wasn’t just another Weasley. She had to break free.

Her eyes narrowed. “The hat doesn’t make mistakes, Malfoy. But perhaps you do. I’m not like my family. I absolutely hate muggles. They disgust me.”

She said the words with force, her lip slightly curled up in a snarl. A rush went through her at the admission. Her family would never allow her to talk like that. Although she didn’t thoroughly hate muggles, she certainly didn’t like them. It was thrilling to finally say it out loud.

Draco looked taken aback. He lifted an eyebrow, eyeing her appraisingly. “Well, Weasley, maybe your family isn’t a complete blood traitor waste after all.”

“My name is Gwendolyn.”

“I don’t recall caring.”

The two glowered at each other for a moment, before Dumbledore gathered everyone's attention for his speech. The night went on rather quickly from that moment, and before long they had headed up to their dorms. Gwendolyn spent her first night in Slytherin tower staring at the ceiling and contemplating her future. Tears would be useless. She had to be strong to get through her Hogwarts career. Her sister would not be at her side. That night, she resolved to be strong, sly, and cunning. It was her best bet at getting through the year unscathed.

Gwendolyn proved during her years at Hogwarts that she was nothing like her family. It gained her the approval of Malfoy, which shot her up the social ladder of Slytherin house. Astoria Greengrass had become her closest friend, and the two girls were accepted into Malfoy’s prominent social circle by the end of their first year. Her growth and flourishing in Slytherin house had driven a large wedge between herself and her family. Her voiced distaste of muggles and her turned nose at muggleborns did not go unnoticed by her family.

 In return for being accepted into Slytherin, she had lost her family relationships.

Summers were always the hardest. She no longer had Ginerva as a friend. The girls had grown cold and distant with each other as a result of Ginerva becoming more confident in herself without her sister constantly in her ear. Percy, before he too had abandoned their family for the ministry, had acted as though she didn’t exist. The twins were more and less the same, although they weren’t as sociable towards her as they were towards the others. Ron absolutely despised her for not only being Slytherin, but also being good friends with Malfoy. Charlie and Bill simply weren’t around.

Her mother was, to put it honestly, disappointed in how she had shunned everything she had been taught morally growing up. Her father resented the way she spoke of muggles, and endlessly attempted to change her mind. They didn’t understand that when she was sorted into Slytherin house as the only Weasley, she did what she needed to do to not only thrive, but survive. 

A small part of her that grown bigger over the years couldn’t help but start to believe in what the Slytherin’s thought. Especially with the way her family shunned her and couldn’t understand that she had done what she needed to do as a scared, lonely eleven year old.

Things had gotten worse since Voldemort's return. At the end of her fourth year, Ron and Ginny had accompanied Harry to the Department of Mysteries where they had fought against Death Eaters and Voldemort himself had shown up. Apparently in protest of Umbridge, they had been involved in Dumbledore’s Army, something they had not invited her to be part of. The rest of her family that still attended Hogwarts had been in the club, aside from her. 

She was used to not being included by now, of course. 

Her parents were a part of the Order of the Phoenix, an organization founded to fight Voldemort and his followers. Her siblings were much more informed on what went on during the meetings than she was. It wasn’t from her lack of trying, of course. When they had spent the summer at Grimmauld Place, she had attempted to listen in on the Extendable Ears with the others. But they always managed to shift away slightly or crowd around the ears so there was no way for her to hear. They simply didn’t trust her.

She had heard the Golden Trio speaking on more than one occasion about how she shouldn’t even have been allowed there with them. None of her siblings ever stuck up for her. It stung, but she supposed it was only reasonable. After all, she was a Slytherin. As Ron had always voiced, normally paired with a biting glare towards her, there wasn’t a witch or wizard that was in Slytherin that hadn’t gone bad. Apparently he had adopted the phrase from Hagrid.

So she sat outside most of the summer, alone, lying under the large Sycamore tree a yard away from the house. She had been offered more than once to visit her housemates' places during the summer, but her parents had forbidden it. With the war gaining momentum, it was too much of a risk. The unspoken message was clear. They didn’t trust that she would keep quiet about any 

“Hey, Gwen.”

Gwendolyn turned with a start, her thick red hair tumbling over her shoulder. Harry Potter stood a few feet away from her, looking awkward as he waited for her reply. She examined him for a moment. He was taller now, more filled out and sturdy, she supposed from an aesthetic standpoint she could understand why her sister liked him so much. 

“Can I help you?” the words were sharp, her brow raised as she awaited an answer. 

He rarely talked to her. None of them did really, except for when their mother forced them all too cheerily to interact ast family dinners and the more sparse family outings. But Harry had always treated her as though she were a bomb, one step too close and she might take him out. 

“Well, erm,” Harry seemed to blanch at her boldness. He seemed to have been expecting her to be more like Ginny. “I was wondering… I know you’re friends with Malfoy,” the name fell from his lips in a twisted spit. “Have you heard much from him this summer? I saw him in Knockturn alley while we were shopping for school supplies, and he seemed off. I just was wondering if he had said anything to you that made you worried.”

Gwendolyn stared at him for a moment, listening to him ramble on. He was awful at being subtle. He wanted to know if she knew any of Draco’s secrets, and he thought if he asked her nicely she would willingly give them up. She had to scoff at that. Typical Gryffindor.

“You’re concerned for his well being?” she stood, her voice falsely sweet. “That’s so kind of you, Potter. But from what I recall, you and Draco don’t care much for each other,” she tapped a finger to her chin, pretending to ponder the thought for a moment. “Oh! You were just hoping I would gossip with you. Perhaps next time, try Veritaserum. Or have your little brainiac give you a more subtle approach.”

Harry stuttered for a moment, seeming at a loss for words. He glanced backwards, and she followed his gaze to see Ron and Hermione standing at the front door of the Burrow, watching them. Her eyes narrowed, her jaw clenching.

“Get lost, Potter,” she snarled, anger flashing through her like a hot branding iron. “Or I’ll give them something to watch.”

“Right, erm, sorry.” Harry managed to say, turning and walking swiftly to the house. He didn’t spare her a backwards glance, and the trio slipped into the Burrow the moment Harry came back.

Gwen tamped down on her anger, wishing desperately she were at Hogwarts already. Tomorrow couldn’t come fast enough.

[shinsoups]

- a thousand paper cranes

pairing: hinata shouyou x amnesiac!reader

genre: soulmate one shot; angst

word count: 993 (i got carried away)

orange = a love filled with warmth and comfort. communication is its foundation. most times two souls are the opposite of each other, nonetheless this creates a rather adventurous life together

There were worse cases out there and Hinata knew that. He should have considered himself lucky to only suffer a minor injury after their game, it was merely luck to not have a broken bone. But still, it bothers him to injure himself at such an important game for the Jackals. But what bothered him the most was the fact that the person he was waiting for never came today.

Waiting for his turn to be wheeled in a room to stay overnight for further examinations, he sat on the cold steel chair provided at the waiting area. Contemplating whether to call the number he was trying to reach for days now. But his calls never seem to go through and that bothered him too much. Must be busy or something came up, I'll try again later, he thought.

You stared at the white wall in front of you, as if haunting you once again of the nightmares that kept you up at night. It had been three days now. Your head ached once more from trying to remember anything about yourself. Amnesia, you laugh at the diagnosis after waking up in an unfamiliar room. The day you woke up, two doctors and some policemen were trying to interrogate you on what had happened. But you have no clue at all. Only the ring on your left hand was your remaining possession before everything went nothing.

The doctor assured you that this would be temporary, just the trauma you suffered from getting mugged in an unfamiliar place. Cruel as it may seem, you never thought that it could possibly happen in real life, let alone at someone like you. Investigation has been going on with the help of the local authorites, but to no avail you still got nothing.

Bored in your room you decided to take the stationary papers given to you by one of the nurses and started folding it once again. They say that folding one thousand paper cranes can make one of your wishes come true. You’re not sure whether you believe in such tale, but for now it’s one of the easiest way to distract yourself that one day some of your memories will return.

“The doctor said you need to stay overnight for them to run some tests on your leg,” Coach Foster said. “Hinata, you’ll be okay. Don’t think much of it, ok?” he assured before leaving the orange haired in the comforts of the hospital room.

On the opposite room where Hinata stays, he noticed paper scattered all over. Picking one up he found the room empty. A sudden rush of panic came bubbling down his throat. He tilted his head, looking for the patient who’s confined in the room. "It can't be," he murmured to himself. Just as he was about to leave he noticed the familiar figure on the corner of his eyes.

The first time your eyes landed on the guy that walked in your room was to ask him what he was doing, but your lips refused to do so. Instead, hot tears started to escape from your eyes. Noticing the orange hearts spreading from his hands as his familiar warm eyes landed on yours. A hazy memory started flooding your head.

“Yeah, yeah...don’t worry this is just between us okay? Don't tell him, mom. He knows I’ll be watching the game on D-day here on his team’s hometown..” You excitedly told your mom on the other line after arriving at the Osaka Airport.

“I sure hope Shouyou would be surprised as well. No- mom he doesn’t know I took a vacation leave for one week. I just want to spend some time with him before his game...That’s why it’s a surprise, right? Yeah...uh-huh... yeah love you too, mom. Bye.” You shuffled your bag on your shoulder ending the phone call.

Hinata couldn’t believe it. What happened? Why were you here? Are you okay? Hundreds of question ran through his mind but the sight of you crying made his heart ache. But what hurts even more was when he tried moving closer to you only to hear you say....

“Do I....Do we k-know each other?” you ask uncertainly, hoping he was the person you remembered. You flinched when he moved closer, a myriad of emotions flash on his face, tears welling in his eyes as he hugged you in his embrace. You unconsciously wrapped your arms around his warmth, seeing the orange hearts once again springing from him. Noticing the same pattern snaking slowly on yours trembling hands.

For a few moments, everything that was going through your head went quiet. Pushing yourself away from him you asked once again, “Y-you're Shouyou...right?"

Flashes of vivid images of him smiling at you filled your mind. The name felt comfortable on your lips, like it's something you say every single day in your life. He nodded, still unable to answer anything you asked.

"y/n," he called out. Y/n... you echoed your own name in your head, opening another door to your lost memories. Resting his chin at your shoulders, Hinata forced himself to smile as he saw the confused look you had on your face.

"Can I help you with the paper cranes you were folding?" there was softness in his voice. "How many more do we have to fold?" he asked, now beaming at you.

Hinata held your hand leading you back to your bed. You looked at your entwined hands, hope blossomed in your chest seeing the same exact ring you were wearing on his finger. You felt at ease. 

Feeling the blood rush into your cheeks when you both saw how orange hearts were continuously springing out of your interlinked hands.

"U-uhmm just about twenty more to go..I think."

There was something about him that seemed so familiar. His scent, his warmth, his very presence made you feel like you're soaking under the comforts of the warm sun. Suddenly you felt like you were home.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

author’s note: this is part of the ‘colors of love’ soulmate one shot mini series im writing. ahhhhhh *i got too caught up in giving some background story on this one.... 😔 also i was hoping to write a fluffy fic for hinata but it turned out to be like this... Oh gods why?? 😭

ps: colors of love is a soulmate oneshot series about the different colors associated with what kind of love and what will timeskip hq!!boys will have in the relationship. mostly the oneshots are first meetings

⚘ · read the other colors here · ⚘

[twiceinadream]

“Your secret’s safe with me.”

Requested: Nope

a/u: Hey, guys! So, my mini series is on a Harry Potter AU for Twice, I’ll release more background info on them later and was inspired by the artwork of @tonidoodles on Twitter. A friend of mine inspired this fic and I hope you all enjoy and there will be a lot more to come! Thank you, I love you guys! And thank you so much Z!

Background: Chaeyoung and Tzuyu are both 3rd years.

Category: Fluff

Word Count: 1.2k

“Come on guys! We aren’t gonna beat Ravenclaw if the Beaters can’t keep bludgers from flying at my head!” Jeongyeon yelled as she ducked again, another bludger nearly knocking her off her broom. The captain sighed in frustration as she flew down from the goalposts, “Practice is over. We’ll pick it up again tomorrow.”

Her team nodded as they went to gather all their equipment, whispering amongst themselves when Jeongyeon left, “What’s got, Yoo, so tense? She’s never this mad during practice.”

The Gryffindor looked at her teammate in shock, “You haven’t heard?” She looked around to make sure no one was listening before whispering in their teammate’s ear, “Im Nayeon called the Captain’s girlfriend a Mudblood.”

The questioner’s eyes went wide, “No way, no one disrespects, Park Jihyo. No wonder Jeong’s so mad.” Her teammate smirked.

“That’s not all, Cap was so mad she dueled Nayeon on the spot and…” Before she could finish, someone behind them cleared their throat, shocking the two talking.

“Stop talking about other people’s business when it doesn’t concern you.” The two turned to find Chaeyoung standing behind them, Gryffindor’s star Seeker. The third year scowled at her teammates, “Don’t let me catch you two again or Jeong will be informed.” The two nodded.

“Of course Chae, won’t happen again.” The Seeker let out a dismissive hum before picking up her bag and leaving the Pitch, beginning the trek down to the lake.

-

Chaeyoung sighed as she finally made it down to the banks of the lake, setting down her bag against a fallen log before sitting against it as well. The smell of the forest filling her lungs as she pulled her sketchbook out of the bag along with a pencil and a sandwich, her sketchbook rested on her leg while she took a bite of the sandwich; her eyes searching for something to draw along the banks, but seemed to find nothing but the waves lapping at the shore. The third year shrugged as she began drawing the lake again, outlining the shore in front of her when she suddenly saw something dart out from the corner of her eye.

Blinking as she looked up from the paper to the edge of the lake where a great white dog now stood, its black eyes finding her’s and Chaeyoung couldn’t find it in herself to take her eyes off it. However, it was the dog who finally looked away and began to turn away from her when Chae suddenly called out to it.

“Wait, come here!” The Gryffindor put on her softest smile as she held out a piece of her sandwich in the direction towards the dog. The creature seemed to contemplate the benefits of walking towards her before opting to go anyway, a look of relief on Chae’s face when the dog approached her. ‘You’re a lot bigger up close.’ The Gryffindor mused, and she wasn’t just thinking that because she was short.

She smiled as she held out the sandwich to the dog, it took it and sat beside her eating the food she had offered. While the dog was distracted for the moment, Chae switched to a blank page in her sketchbook and picked her pencil up to begin sketching the dog next to her, assuming it must be someone’s pet. She smiled as she gave the dog the rest of her sandwich to keep it distracted while she drew, she reached a hand out to pet the dog which it didn’t seem to mind, occasionally leaning into her touch.

The dog’s head eventually found its way into Chaeyoung’s lap as she continued drawing the animal, smiling to herself as she petted its head, “I wonder why I’ve never seen you before? Maybe you’ve met my friend, Tzuyu? She loves animals.” The dog’s ears perked up at the name, but Chaeyoung didn’t seem to notice as she continued to draw, a bittersweet laugh leaving her lips, “Friend.” The Gryffindor sighed sadly as she kept stroking the dog’s head, “With a Pureblood family like the Chou’s they’d never let her be with a Half-blood, no less one that grew up in the Muggle world. And who am I kidding? She’d never like me back to begin with.” Chaeyoung seemed to deflate after that, but continued to pet the dog while she drew and before she knew it, the dog was fast asleep in her lap. The dog’s breathing the only sound beside the rustling of the leaves in the wind or the water coming onto the shore.

The Seeker continued to stroke the dog’s head as it slept, its puffy and slightly coarse hair passing between her fingers as she attempted to draw the texture of the dog’s hair on the paper. Getting lost in her work, Chae didn’t seem to pay attention to her hand on the dog until the hair between her fingers began to feel soft and sleek, opposed to the coarse and puffy hair she had been petting for the past hour. Only then did she dare to look down at the dog.

Chaeyoung’s eyes widened when instead of being greeted by the sight of the great white dog, she looked down to see that Chou Tzuyu had taken its place. The Gryffindor had to physically suppress her gasp of shock so as to not wake the sleeping girl and scare her off, but Chaeyoung still couldn’t help the thoughts that raced through her mind, ‘Oh my god! She’s an Animagus!’ The Half-blood let out a breath she didn’t know she had been holding when a thought dawned on her, ‘I told her I liked her!’

Chae felt the urge to facepalm when she felt Tzuyu shift in her lap, petrifying the Gryffindor before the Slytherin seemed to find a comfortable position and fell back asleep. Chaeyoung let out a sigh of relief as she attempted to calm her heart rate and continue drawing, her hand hesitantly going back to stroke Tzuyu’s hair.

-

Another half-hour passed when Tzuyu finally woke, stretching out her arms in front of her face blinking when she saw hands instead of paws. The Slytherin immediately felt panic flood her body as she shot up to a sitting position, startling the living daylights out of Chaeyoung. The two friends met each other’s eyes.

Much like before, Tzuyu was the first to break their staring contest as she started scrambling to get up and run away from Chae, when the Gryffindor suddenly lunged and grabbed her by the wrist to keep her from going, “Tzuyu, wait! Please don’t go.” The Pureblood looked at her friend with worry in her eyes but nodded, “Okay, sit.” Tzuyu sat almost immediately, scowling at the shorter girl, “Sorry.”

Chaeyoung sighed, letting go of her friend’s wrist, “Well, I know you’re an Animagus. And I won’t ask how it happened, but just know; your secret’s safe with me.” Tzuyu gave her a small smile as she nodded, she was always a girl of few words. The Slytherin then got up and began walking towards the path that led back to the school, but suddenly stopped and turned back around to face her friend, “Hey, Chae,” the Seeker’s head shot up at her name, meeting Tzuyu’s eyes, “I like you too.”

The Gryffindor’s mouth fell open in surprise as her brain didn’t seem to register what she had just been told, she couldn’t help the smile that formed on her lips as she looked to the ground for a second, letting the information sink in, ‘Tzuyu liked her too!’ When Chae looked back up she was met with the sight of the great white dog staring back at her, they both shared a knowing look before the dog turned and ran towards the path. Leaving Chae alone and smiling like an idiot.

[jungshookz]

HI CEE!!! I’VE BEEN A LONG TIME READER AND I JUST WANNA SAY THAT THEYRE SO GOOD AND I ALWAYS SQUEAL IN JOY WHEN U UPDATE 🥺 especially sommelier! hoseok,,,pLEASE KEJDJSJS THAT WAS SO CUTE 🤧 also i miss ur updates and im looking really forward to read la vie en bonsai and i hope u continue the king!yoongi drabble lol i havent calmed down ever since i saw yoongi’s undercut and my hormones are raging 🥵

hi hi!!!!! thank you for the support!!!!! hehe i’m also looking forward to introducing u guys to a brand spankiNG new universe!!!!! 

i’m contemplating turning king!yoongi into a mini series like i did with ballet!jimin :’) 

[fanficsrusz]

My Obligation Part 1 - Keanu Reeves Mini Series

A/n: This was requested by @ringa-starr and it is a personalised fic but obviously you can just change the name to your own or keep it as a general story. Im going to make this into 3 or 4 parts i think. So yhhh i hope you enjoy it 😘😘

______________________

Deidra laid on the bed as tears rolled down her face, creating wet marks on the grey bed sheets. She attempted to wipe them away but more tears just took their place within seconds. 

"babe it's not that bad" keanu said as he stood at the doorway, watching his wife with his soft brown eyes. 

Keanu and Deidra had been married for a little under 2 years now. They had met when Deidra accidentally spilled her coffee all over him as she rushed out a coffee shop one cold December 5 years ago. She apologised profusely and he had offered to get her another coffee which eventually accepted despite refusing at first since it was her own fault. But being the true gentleman that Keanu was, he refused to take no for an answer. 

They hit it off immediately as they talked about anything and everything. Eventually, they began to date after a few months of being friends. Her life was turned upside down once she started dating the celebrity, but it was certainly for the best and since he kept his life pretty private from the world, they weren't bothered that much. In fact, no one really knew that they were together and it was only when wedding pictures emerged of them did the world find out. 

"what do you mean" Deidra sobbed as she sat up "this was my last pair of jeans and they don't fit me anymore. I'm so fat" she held her face in her hands as the tears continued and john just laughed at his wife as he walked over to her. "Deidra, you are not fat. You're just pregnant". Yes it was true. Deidra was 6 months pregnant with their first child. When she first found out, she didn't know how to react. Should she have cried? Laughed? Ran away? She wanted to do them all. She wasn't ready to be a mother and she was scared to tell Keanu. Scared he wouldn't want to have a child. 

After a week of contemplating her options, she soon decided on just blurting it out over dinner on a Sunday night. Keanu was ecstatic and he made a promise to her that night. She could still picture the scene clearly in her head. How he had abruptly stood from the dinner table and made his way over to her, eloping her in a hug that made her feel safe and secure as he told her his promise. 

    Deidra. I love you with all my heart and soul. I promise i will not let anything or anyone hurt you or our baby. I will do everything in my power to keep you two happy. I promise"

Deidra sat up and faced keanu as he smiled at her "there's my beautiful girl" he said as he helped pull her up, her jeans still undone around her giant belly. Keanu looked down at her belly and placed his hands on either side of her enlarged stomach as he talked to the baby. "right little missy. You need to hurry up and join us because you're upsetting your mum and if I'm honest. I can't wait to hold you" he placed a soft kiss on the bump and this caused Deidra to smile. She couldn't have hoped for a better man to start a family with. Keanu stood up and placed a kiss on Deidra's lips. "I'm so scared" she whispered as she looked down at the bump and keanu just smiled. "so am i. But we will get through it" he grabbed her hands "together". The pair continued to stand there for a few more minutes before Deidra stepped back. "ok we need to get ready. The doctor's appointment is in half an hour. Do you have some joggers I can borrow for today and I'll just buy some maternity jeans when we're out" she began to step out of jeans whilst holding onto Keanu for support. "yeah i have some old ones that are a bit too small." he smiled softly as he watched the love of his live move around the room. 

Soon enough, Deidra was laid on a hospital bed whilst a nurse conducted an ultrasound. moving the small device Deidra's belly, the baby became clear and Keanu gripped onto her hand not believing any of this was real. The nurse smiled and turned to the pair "so it's definitely a girl and she's perfectly healthy. At least now you can start buying some clothes and toys" she said as she began to clean Deidra's stomach. "believe me she will be spoiled just like her mother" keanu joked earning himself a small hit from his wife and the nurse just smiled fondly at the perfect domestic scene in front of her. 

Upon leaving the hospital, Deidra was finally beginning to feel the excitement of having a baby. She wanted nothing more than to just hold her baby in her arms and have keanu sat next to her. "lets go baby shopping" Deidra said suddenly as the pair walked down the stairs and keanu smiled "I thought you would never ask" he kissed her on the cheek and they began to make their way to the mall. 

A few hours later and Deidra stood in the spare room which would soon be turned into a nursery. She watched on as keanu brought in box after box of things the baby would need. Coat, baby changing station, wardrobe, and toys. "let me help" she pleaded as she went to pick up a small box and keanu stopped her "no let me do it. I don't want you hurting yourself" keanu took the box out of her hands and Deidra gave him an annoyed look. "keanu, im pregnant not dying" keanu laughed knowing how stubborn his wife could be. He turned to face her "fine, you can bring in the light stuff" he pointed to a few bags filled with teddies and clothes. She smiled knowing she had him wrapped around her little finger "thank you" she smiled, slapping his ass as she walked past him. Keanu stared at her before laughing at her actions, soon returning to the task of building the furniture.

Several hours later and the two were in bed. It was only 10pm but Deidra could barely keep her eyes open. Slowly closing her eyes, sleep consumed her as she took advantage of the babies stillness inside her. Ever since she hit the 5 month mark and began to move inside, she was finding it hard to sleep since the baby gave her either terrible heartburn or laid on her bladder, making her want to pee every 10 minutes. Tonight was no acception, within 2 hours of sleep she was suddenly awoken by the urge to pee. Sighing she sat up in bed, looking at keanu she couldn't help but smile. He held onto her stomach protectively with a small smile on his face as he slept. Slowly shifting away from him, she made her way to the toilet.

 "you are not making this easy for me sweety" she whispered to the bump as she made her way out of the bathroom and to the hallway. After peeing, she no longer felt tired and decided she would go make something to eat instead. The second she made her way to the landing and placed her hand on the banister, she froze. A noise came from downstairs, paper rustling. At first she thought it was her imagination but her fear was soon verified as she saw a shadow being cast across the floor. Quietly she turned and bolted as fast as she could to her bedroom. "keanu" she whisper shouted as she entered the bedroom closing the door behind her. She moved to his side and shook his violently. Keanu jumped up, shocked to see Deidra stood over him. "what is it? Is it the baby? Are you ok?" he asked worriedly as he stood. She shook her head and shushed him "no I'm fine. I heard something downstairs, i think someone broke in" keanu stood up and pushed Deidra to the bathroom as he handed her a phone. "lock yourself in there and call the police. I'll go and check it out ok?" y/n shook her head. "nonono what if they hurt you. Please stay here with me and we can just call the police" he smiled at her "Deidra. I'll be fine." she knew it was stupid to try and argue with him and so just nodded, walking into the bathroom she locked the door and rang the police. After telling the 999 operator the emergency, she sat on the toilet listening to hear is she could hear noise from downstairs. It felt like hours and she soon grew inpatient. She crept towards the door and placed her ear against it trying to see if it would help. A loud knock came from the otherside causing her to jump back and hold onto the counter top. She held her breath, not knowing who was behind the door. "Deidra it's me. The police are here you can come out" keanu's voice broke the silence, Deidra released the breath she was holding as she unlocked the door and pulled it open. She grabbed onto him pulling him into a hug and he kissed her head. "it's ok. There was nothing. I checked and there was no one. The police are going to do a quick sweep to double check but it's ok." he rubbed her head as he held onto her. He may have put on a brave face for Deidra, but on the inside he was terrified. Terrified that Deidra and the baby could have been hurt. 

He sighed and pulled her back to bed. "Come on let's get you back to bed, i'll handle the police". 

As Deidra climbed into bed, she watched as kenau walked downstairs and could hear the faint mumbling of his voice talking to the cops. As she sat back, she couldn't help but feel uneasy. She felt as if she was being watched. She grabbed onto her stomach and sighed. She was just being paranoid or so she thought.

__________________

Taglist:

@gwenebear

[notyourinquisitormate]

I see people ranking the Love Death + Robots eps so here's my list 🖤❌🤖

From best to worst:

1. Sonnie's Edge

Oh dear, where do I start. Amazing animation, great story and an even greater monster fight scene. The double twist in the end won my heart. My top fave Love Death + Robots episode. I could talk about this one all day. Honestly, Sonnie's Edge should be at least an 1 hour movie.

2. Good Hunting!

I fell in love with the story and the art style fit the setting perfectly. Combining steampunk themes with magic, while exploring the effects of modernization on both humans and magical creatures was a brilliant idea.

3. Beyond the Aquila Rift

Again, awesome animation?? I loved it from start to finish (except maybe for the long and completely irrelevant to the plot sex scene😂). I see many posts about how this episode fucked people up and, to be honest, the ending did leave me a bit shaken too. However, Greta remains an intriguing character and I would have loved to see more of her. Or at least a last attempt from her part to communicate with Thom after her revelation.

4. Three Robots

This whole episode had me laughing and I'm a sucker for post-apocalyptic settings. With wholesome characters, a fascinating and unique plot idea and some great comedy, this could easily make a succesful mini series. I would watch the shit out of it.

5. Shape-Shifters

Werewolves. Marine werewolves. I personally didn't really need much else to love the ep description. In addition to the very interesting concept of supernatural beings living amongst humans without always having to hide their true identity, this episode was also an amazing piece of animation. Good fight scene, and even though my heart still hurts i really enjoyed it as a whole.

6. The Secret War

For about half the ep I was sure it was a live action short film (or at least partially). Good plot and we do get closure in the end, which doesn't really apply to all the episodes of Love Death + Robots. Still one of the sad stories of the series.

7. Zima Blue

This one was deep. And can we talk about the remarkable art style?? The ending was a nice plot twist and the story left me contemplating it's meaning for some time afterwards. I mean, all that journey around the cosmos only to return to a simpler way of thinking in order to find fulfilment? The bizarre murals that depicted the universe and then, im the middle of it all, Zima's whole world? This was some really deep shit and you can't change my mind.

8. Suits

Did anyone else think the art style was similar to Sims 4? Like, that's all I could focus on until things got tough for the characters. Also a sad story, but the zoom out in the end made things more interesting. (Couldn't help thinking about the battle of Wakanda during the last scene either😁).

9. Lucky 13

Another super realistic piece of animation. I would have liked some more details about the missions and Lucky 13. We learn that ships have personalities and I hoped to see 13 and Cutter interact at least once. My mind kept coming up with different theories about what exactly happened to the 2 crews before Cutter's, and we never got answers about any of the most important things. Still, a beautiful story though.

10. Helping Hand

Ok this one fucked me up more than Beyond the Aquila Rift. It's not just the whole concept of floating in space, helpless and running out of oxygen, that I find absolutely terrifying, but also the sacrifice the poor woman had to make in order to survive. I would have taken my suit off and embraced my death the moment I would hear that help is more than 50 mins away. Seriously, that's the stuff of nightmares.

11. Fish Night

Loved the colours and the story is similar to dreams I've had over the years. I will never forget that one quote from the ep. Didn't really have anything else to offer apart from the good animation. The plot was kinda boring and the ending didn't save it at all.

And finally Ice Age, I guess

Ok this one was the least interesting from the episodes I liked. The ending confused me a bit cause how was the whole thing able to start over when he had unplugged the freaking refrigerator. Maybe it didnt work that way, dunno. I needed more information, like where did they get the refrigerator from? Or why weren't they more shocked when they discovered what was hidden inside it?

And then we have the eps I didn't really care about:

1. Sucker Of Souls

A story about Dracula, so I thought I would end up liking it more. In the end the only thing I care about is Gary (cause let's be honest, Gary was the best and we all liked this character). The plot was meh and the ending even more disappointing and anticlimactic.

2. When the Yogurt Took Over

Ok this one at least was actually referring to how technology makes our lives easier and raised questions about what would happen to humanity if we suddenly had to live without it. However, I personally found it a bit boring and would never compare it to the episodes mentioned above.

3. The Witness

I seriously don't understand why so many people love this episode. Apart from the great art style there was nothing else worth liking. The story was a mess and we all spent the whole ep watching a naked lady run for her life, boobs bouncing, and a guy stopping to get his d*ck sucked while chasing her around the city. I've tried to gather some info on the ending cause I really needed to understand it, but the best explanation I could find was that she is actually running away from her demons. Still doesn't explain the endless loop so I just gave up trying.

4. Blindspot

Yeah..this one had no plot and not a single piece of information was given to us about the characters and the mission. I could have just skipped it and I wouldn't have missed anything.

5. The Dump

I have to admit that I didn't expect that turn of events, so points for that, I guess. Overall a boring story I won't be watching again soon.

6. Alternate Histories

What the actual f*ck was that?? When I read the description I thought it would be a very interesting episode that would explore different possibilities regarding the impact Hitler had on the history of the world. But no.. it was just a messed up story that made my eyes bleed and a complete disappointment.

[michaelreaderreblog]

My truemate pt15

AN: Well another part to this lovely series is upon us. Its fairly long and Im sorry for such on going part. I felt it was necessary to add in a very long part. I do hope you all will enjoy this part. It took a while for me to edit this and longer than I expected to post this. I was in way over my head while writing this and editing. But please enjoy. 

Catch up here >> ONE TWO THREE FOUR FIVE SIX SEVEN EIGHT NINE TEN ELEVEN 

TWELVE THIRTEEN FOURTEEN

********************************************

Word Count: 5,148

Once Michael was done with writing down the lyrics, he contemplated about calling his brother knowing that he is working and not only that but working with his mate.

He couldnt wipe the smile off from his face when he just thought of you as his mate.

He is brought out of his thoughts when he heard someone knocking at the door and they entered without him answering.

“Am I interrupting something?” Dean is the one who knocks at his door and enters into his office.

“Dean, please come in” he says and still cant wipe away the smile from his face as your brother takes the seat beside his desk.

“What brings you here? Need more supplies? I can give you for whatever discount” he says a little quickly but he cant help it with all the happiness bursting from him.

“No, I just wanted to know if you wanted to have lunch together. And whats got you all happy go lucky?” Dean says also with a smile on his face from the look on Michael.

“Sure we can have lunch together, since I brought my own from home and to answer your question. Anna and I spoke not to long ago, it appears that we have reached a mutual agreement” he says getting his lunch from the mini fridge and bring out two beers as well and handing it to Dean who takes it willingly.

“Ok, what did you two agree on?” he asks taking his sandwich out of the lunch bag you bought for him.

He didnt want to use at first because made him look like a little kid all over again.  

“Well we ended things on good terms, turns out she also met her true mate and she knew that I have met mine. Now I dont need to worry about anything or the voice at the back of my mind telling me how wrong it is to end things just because I have met my true mate. I can now happily go about this with y/n” he says looking to Dean and still cant get the smile off from his face.

Dean knew how relieved Michael is knowing how much he has been feeling guilty for some what hiding this.

“She met her true mate too? And she waited to tell you this after how long?” he asks after he takes a gulp from his beer and wait for his answer.

While he takes a bite from his sandwich you have made for him the night before.  

He couldnt believe how much his food tasted so good with the Swiss cheese and honey mustard.

“She said she met her true mate about two months ago. She was willing to sacrifice her happiness to be with me still. I couldnt believe it when she said that and I still cant. I mean would you do the same if yours came along but being with someone current and not wanting them to be hurt by being left alone?” he says while looking to Dean and still couldnt get that out of his mind.

“I am amazed but I would do the same. I wouldnt want the hurt and loneliness on anyone when I care so much for the person I was with. By my books she is a good person, even to the point where she would put everything on hold for someone” he says while finishing off his sandwich only wishing he could have another and to his surprise as he looks into his lunch bag there is another with a note.

“Knew you would be wanting another so I made an extra one for you. Didnt want you feeling gloomy only having one, Im not that cruel.

Love you

Y/n”

Dean smiled at the note that you left for him and couldnt be more thankful for another sandwich.

“Looks like someone is a happy camper” Michael says after noticing Dean with another sandwich.

“Yeah my sister made me an extra one and she knew I would want another. She thankfully made me one and left me a note. Gotta love her right” he says looking to Michael only realizing what he just said.

“Thats right” he says smiling never leaving his face.

“Whats your next move now that everything is official?” he asks while taking a bite from his food and only loving you even more.

“First off tell my brother all about this and take things slow considering what happened with Roman. Im sure she is still weary about the whole being close to another Alpha” he says almost sounding hurt when anger begins to reek up the place and Dean sees the expression on his face.

“Wow, dude easy. Y/n is fine and I think she is wanting to be with you for a while now. So no need to be worried about the Dick thing. All though Sam and I are still trying to get her to call the cops. We even told her we would be her witnesses and I talked with Benny he is more than willing to be a witness to” he finishes as he knows that Michael is defusing from his rage about Roman.

“I would love to be a witness when she calls the police as well. My father takes Omega rights seriously and with my brother being one and what happened all those years ago” Michael says as he gets quieter and thinks about the time when his brother Lucifer saved him.

“What do you mean? What happened to Cas?” Dean asks and that came out a little too quickly.

Michael hears him as he gives him a nick name already and gives him a weird expression. He ends up telling Dean what happened to Lucifer along with Castiel all those years ago.

He starts from the beginning, not leaving anything out from what Castiel has told him before while they were living in Portland.

He told him the day he presented Omega, how Lucifer told him to stay home so that his scent could go away. How he ended up going out anyway only to be kidnapped and taken to a warehouse outside of town waiting to be transferred to a brothel where he will be sold multiple times.

How Lucifer tracked him down by GPS on his phone, got him out of the warehouse and how he died. How Castiel felt completely guilty by blaming himself for so many years. Michael finished off by telling Dean he got his parents to agree for the move to Portland and finally coming home a year ago.

“No wonder why he asked if Sam and I were Alpha's before agreeing to work with y/n. My mate was hurt and I wasnt there to save him” he says in a hushed tone and before he could react. Dean went wide eyed as he had his face in both of his palms.

“Wait? What? You what?” Michael asks while only concentrating on what Dean has called his baby brother.

“Um yesterday when I went down to y/n's office to ask her and my brother where they wanted to go for supper because I didnt feel like cooking. I saw Cas there and immediately caught his scent which screamed at me 'mate' I couldnt believe I found mine as well” he says looking away from Michael and like he was waiting for him to punch Dean or something.

“You didnt take him did you?” is all that Michael asked as he still looks to Dean.

“What? No, I wouldnt do that, wouldnt force myself on him like that. Plus Sam and y/n were there to keep things under control which I did. Y/n waited with him until you got to the house to pick him up. While they were waiting for you, I was talking with Sam about how perfect he is for me and what his scent gave me.” he says as he tells Michael all of this

“What does his scent tell you? Better yet what does he smell like to you?” he asks leaning closer to Dean to hear him better.

“Now you sound like my brother. He smells like honey, lavender, and fresh pine after a rain fall when it gets the food it needs to grow. His scent screams at me how he is sweet when you need nurturing after a hard days of work and how he also can be my equal by being hard working himself. I have always wanted a mate who is capable of wanting to work to help provide you know. At the same time who will be a loving, kind, and extra nurturing when it comes to extending the family to having pups. I know he can provide just as much as he protects when it comes to the people he loves the most and thats what his scent screams at me when I am near him” Dean says while smiling to the thought of Cas being his equal now and forever.

“Well I must say I know what you mean when it comes to having an equal and not just to have an Omega around just because they can birth your pups. I know where you are coming from and thats how I feel about y/n. Right when I caught her scent at the diner is when I knew she is my mate” Michael says breaking the silence between the both of them.

“What does she smell like to you?” Deans turn to interrogate him about the scent you give of on him while he is near you.

“Her scent smells like freshly grind coffee, banana's and caramel. When waking up in the morning to that fresh pot of coffee after picking the coffee beans fresh. It tells me how incredibly devoted to working she is and how much she is vibrant when being incredibly influenced or inspired. It also tells me how incredibly nurturing she can be and by seeing it for myself with the lunch she made for you along with extras just proves my point how loving and selfless she is. I know its too early to be thinking this way but makes me think a lot about the pups on how she is going to be as in the love and devotion she will be giving to our future pups and to me” he adds while he finishes off his beer and looks to Dean who is warming up to him even more.

“I knew there is a reason why I had to come by and have this lunch with you. When I was driving home I got this feeling at the pit of my stomach to stop by here and Im glad I did. I could now sort of officially give you my blessing well sort of. Im not quite ready to let her go. I mean I still see her as a baby and we practically raised her when my mom got sick and my dad took care of her. But when she passed away it all went down hill from there, my dad got heavy on the drinking after her death. When my dad passed away from a mugging gone wrong thats when I really stepped up into taking care of her. She made it easy for me though, she wasnt trouble only when the Officials came for her. After a nosy neighbour got into our business after she went into her first heat and presented Omega. I fought tooth and nail for her to be kept away from those Academies and having them taking her away from me. I didnt want that for her, those Academies they find suitable Alpha's for the Omegas later and I didnt want her missing out on her true mate. Sam was away for school at the time and he was going to school at Stanford studying pre law in Omega rights.” Dean tells him everything that happened back in Sioux Falls well he might as well considering he is basically family now.

“Wow, what did your mother get sick from? I heard about those Academies on their suitors for potential mates just makes my skin crawl if that ever happened to Castiel. I am really happy you fought for her, I dont want to know how she would be like when coming out of that. After hearing about the things they make them do and the tests they make them take before being taken to the Academies on the news.” Michael says as he cringes at the thought of you or his baby brother being taken to one.

“My mom got diagnosed with breast cancer ten years ago, she fought back and got the chemo therapy. She got better for a while until the cancer came back and she got worse slowly. Until it came on really strong and deteriorated her health is when it took over completely and took her away from us. I wish she would have been here to meet our mates, god she would have loved you, Castiel and Sarah. Oh thats Sams mate who works at Stitching to Heaven” Dean tells Michael about your moms health with the breast cancer and how much she would have loved each of yours and their mates.

“Sarah Blake, yeah I know her. My mom tried setting me up with her but I never followed suit though, didnt have the right scent for me” he says while gesturing his hands towards himself, they both laugh at the motion and continue on with their conversation about anything.

Dean really had begun to approve of Michael now and how he is doing the same by approving him with Castiel.

“I guess Dean really got himself busy and probably stopped by Sams work to have lunch with him.” you say as you look how far Cas has come with making a plush toy himself.

“Wouldnt surprise me either considering how each of you are incredibly close with each other” Cas says looking away from what he was doing and looks at you where you stand behind him.

“Yeah” is all that you could say back to Cas with a smile spread on your face.

“How about we take a break ourselves and have lunch upstairs, I think I got some left over mushroom chicken along with macaroni salad from yesterdays supper in the fridge” you tell him as you are about to step out of the office and head on upstairs but something at the pit of your stomach starts to get warm and slick begins to build up from you.

“Oh no, any day but not today” as you lean against the door frame, Cas looks to you wide eyed knowing all too well what comes next.

“Your heat is coming, here let me help to your room” Cas says as he lifts you bridal style about to head up the stairs.

“No Cas the other room there, we have that for my heats and there are toys in the closet” you tell him before he steps any further up the stairs.

“I like that you have your own place to have your heats in, I know how painful it is to go through your heats alone” he says while he hesitates to finish what he was going to say.

He looks at you as you are beginning the worse of your heat and finally he gives it the last thought and kisses you.

“Cas what are you doing?” you ask as you pull away from the kiss.

“I am going to help you through your heat and I dont want to see you go through it alone by only using toys. Plus I cant get you pregnant anyways so its a win win for us” he says a little to proudly.

Your heat comes on even more forcefully now and slick begins to slip from you.

“No no no no I cant let you do that. Just get me a toy ok, its in a box in the closet” you tell him as you begin to struggle with forming sentences.

“You are being incredibly modest now. Just let me help you” he says as he takes your clothes off.

While he is making your heat any less discomforting and help you through the first wave is when you begin to feel a bit better.

“Castiel thank you, I dont know how I am going to explain this to Dean and I dont know how he is going to feel about this.” you tell him as you pant after the both of you finish together from the much needed physical touch.

“We will get to that point when we are done settling these first few waves of heat and it should settle before he comes home after work” he says as he gets himself ready again and you look at him all confused but later thinking he has read your mind and you straddle his lap this time.

After the second wave has settled is when the both of you lay side by side to give yourselves rest after the second round.

“Castiel I am really thankful for you doing this for me” you say while trying to catch your breath and if you were being honest with yourself, he was doing better than you thought he would do.

He settled the eagerness of wanting a knot swelled up inside you and even though he wasnt equipped like an Alpha but he did the trick and that amazed you in so many ways.

“You would do the same for me” is all he says with a smile on his face as he spoons you from behind to rest before the third wave comes along.

“I better call my mom and let her know what is going on and to let her know that I will be with you for the remaining of your heat” he says as he gets up from the bed and reaches for him phone in his pocket.

“How do you think she is going to react when you’re telling her you’re having sex with me just to settle my heat” you say while rolling over to face him.

“Thats exactly what Im going to tell her” he says to you.

“Mom, something has come up and I wont be able to make it home for the remainder of the week” he says as you know his mom has picked up the phone.

“Well y/n got her heat and I am helping through it. I didnt want her to go through it with only using toys knowing very much how that doesnt help settle the waves” he says looking to the ceiling.

“Yeah I will, no the third wave should be coming on soon” he answers his mom and you can already feel the third wave coming and its coming on really strong.

You get him ready yourself, as he sees what your doing and his head falls back to the pillow trying very hard not to make a sound over the phone with his mom.

“Mom, I got to go now. I will speak to you later” he hangs up as soon as you line him up against you and push all the way down.

He lifts himself from the pillow as you straddle his lap again and wraps both of his arms around to lift you up and then down again to hit that desired spot repeatedly. He lifts you off from himself as you begin to whimper at the sudden emptiness.

“Dont worry, get on your hands and knees” he says against your ear and that lust of spark goes right through you.

He lines himself up and within one swift move he is buried deep inside you.

When the third wave of heat begins to settle is when you begin to feel dehydrated, he sees this and immediately is about the run for the door.

“Castiel there is bottled water in the corner there, you dont need to run up the stairs but we do need to eat though” you tell him as he sees the stacked bottled water in the corner of the room.

“Your brothers really do love you to have all this ready for you” he says while still trying to catch his breath.

You see him go get the water for you and he just looks fucked out which a giggle escapes your mouth.

“What are you giggling about?” he asks as a smile appears on his face when coming to seat himself beside you as you lay there all fucked out yourself.

“You just look completely fucked out right now and the hair alone. I am so sorry and so thankful at the same time. I am just wondering how Dean, Sam, and Michael are going to feel about this when they come home to a fucked out scent.” you say as you keep giggling only to stop when you mentioned about Michael coming home knowing very well he goes home to someone else and that hurt comes to you all over again.

He sees and feels this when he lays beside you to put an arm around your body to pull you closer to him.

“Hey I see that, look at me” he says as he lifts your chin to meet his gaze with his hand and you comply.

“I know all of this Michael thing is really getting to you but you know for one thing it will get better. I mean something will be done dont worry. Michael knows what he is doing with this whole entire thing. About me and you though I am pretty sure he will understand this and as for Dean well we will get to that. Since you’re not due for another wave for awhile.” he says to you while that makes you feel better a bit but the whole Dean thing is a different story.

“I better call him before he sees us when he gets home and what you are doing to help” you tell him as you get up from the bed to use the home phone thats in the room.

You dial his number and wait for him to answer.

“Hey y/n, whats up?” he answers on the third ring and you hesitate at first but this needs to come out.

“Hey Dean, what are you up to?” you ask in a hushed tone

“Taking a long lunch break with Michael. How are you and Cas doing?” he asks while he sounds very chipper and you didnt want Michael to hear what is going to be said when he reacts to what you want to tell him.

“Dean, you mind stepping away from Michael because I dont want him to hear when you react to this ok” you instruct him to be away from him while you tell him about your heat and among other things and didnt want Michael to be an ear shot away.

“Uh, ok” he says while he tells Michael that he would be a minute and needed to step out.

'Great they had lunch together' you thought to yourself as you lean against the door frame

“Whats going on? You’re beginning to scare me here, sounding all cryptic” he says with worry

“Its my heat Dean it came” you tell him and stop yourself from going into further detail.

“Are you ok? Do you need me to come home? Where is Cas?” he asks with one sentence and you barely made out what he had said.

“Im fine, the worst is out of the way. Now they are going to wave through a couple of hours at a time. Castiel is still here and he helped me with the waves” you tell him as you get quieter at the end of you conversation with your brother.

“Im so glad he is still there other wise I would have just came driving home if he wasnt. Well at least he knows what to do with you, I mean you two have more in common than we do” he says as he sounds relieved that Cas was around to look after you.

“No, Dean. He helped me through the worst of the heat and he is going to continue helping me get through this” you say while clearing up the explanation.

“You mean to tell me that Cas is helping you through your heat as in the both of you are well you know” he says while he gets really uncomfortable speaking the word of sex to you or just you and sex in a more general sentence.

“Sex Dean. Look I know he is your mate and all and I just wanted to tell you myself before you came home from work. I just didnt want you to be mad at me for fondling your mate and he offered to help me through this because he knows how it is at the very stages of the heat when it comes. He helped me to the room, told him where the toys were and if it were him I would do the same in helping him out to and I wouldnt let him suffer like that” you went on to explain further more and admitted you would do the same for him.

Even though he would need an actual knot but when it came to relieving the heat that comes along you had experimented with the toys you had.

You always made sure it was angled to hit the most sensitive spot and grinded it out till you came knowing that would settle the heat from coming on strong.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, y/n I would never be mad at you for my mate helping you out. Like I said you two have more in common than we do and he knows exactly what to do when it comes to the heats. Plus I never liked you having to deal with your heats alone and I am really happy he is there to help you through the worst. I cant be mad because I know for a fact that either of you cannot complete a bond between the both of you anyways and knowing for sure that either of you cant get pregnant while with each other. You have no worries with me being mad at the both of you. Now if he was Beta then we would be having a whole different conversation about this and this would be a whole different out come.” he says with a very sincere tone in his voice as he telling all of this and you begin to feel very relieved about telling him in the first place.

“I was flipping out before I even called and for sure that you would be pissed at me for even touching your mate. I am just really glad you are understanding to all of this, really thank you it means a lot coming from you” you tell him while leaning your head against the wall as you talk to him on the phone.

Castiel comes back to the room with a tray of food in his hands, he settles the tray beside as you move over to make room for him on the bed and he steps into bed as well.

“I think I am just going to take the suppressants after this” you say and Cas whips his head towards you all wide eyed in complete shock.

“What?” is all that Dean could get out of his mouth as soon as you heard suppressants.

“Yeah, I have been thinking about this for a while and I looked online its totally safe for me to get them. The state of Washington doesnt have the same rules as Sioux Falls or any where else for that matter and basically its safe for all Omega to go on suppressants on the west coast. We dont need to worry about the government snooping around for them to tell the Officials from the Academies to arrive” you tell him further and make sure that Cas hears what you are telling your brother.

“I dont know baby girl, it still scares me ok. Lets check with Sam first to see if this is really legitimate ok and in the mean time just take care of yourself ok. We will talk more about these suppressants when you are done the heat ok?” he asks and you knew talking about suppressants scared Dean a lot, heck it scared you a lot but it was something to consider.

“Ok, I'll see you when you get home ok” you tell him finally after the both of you being silent for a few moments.

“Yeah I will see you when I get home from work, and make sure the both of you eat something alright” he says before getting off the phone with you.

“I will make sure, later” you hang up the phone after the conversation with Dean and look to Cas who still is in complete shock at the mentions of you going on suppressants

“Are you really serious about going on suppressants?” he asks not taking his gaze off from you.

“Yeah I have been thinking about this for a while after we moved here and thought I would talk to my brothers about it first and see how they feel about it. I already know how Dean feels about me taking those medications” you tell him as you take a piece of chicken from the plate thats on the tray between you and Cas.

“I just want to take control of this stupid heat just like I control other things going on and this is the number one thing I know I can take care of by taking something that will keep my heat at bay” you tell Cas by looking to him a few times and look away again because you didnt want to break down mid sentence while explaining to him on how you feel about your heat.

“Well if this is something that you want then all I can do is support you no matter what and I am not saying this because you are my boss but because you are dear to me now and family” he says looking to you as he takes your hand in his to entwine them together and you know that he is being very sincere and genuine.

After a few days that your heat is passed and all that lingers is the scent that is left behind and to be on the safe side you closed shop for a few more days to make sure your scent wasnt in the air anymore. As the weekend comes is when Sam leaves to the city with Sarah and maybe who knows if they were going to come back mated.

**************************

I hope I tagged everyone, if you would like to be added to the tags. Send me an ask or message and I will be happy to add you. Thanks for reading my loves

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[heartthrobcityimagine]

Who Is This??/Part 1/ Noah Centineo

Your friend Jace tries to play match maker with a number switch up..

WARNING: language, Sexual things?

—————————————————————

*PING!*

Groaning you roll over to see who in the hell was texting you in the middle of the night. The glaring bright screen of your phone blinding you in the face. An unknown number with a simple message, “Hi.”

Who in the hell? Groaning, I swear if Jace is trying to play match maker again I’m going to murder him.

“Who is this?” You reply. You lock your screen back and lay your head back down on your pillow. No sooner than you closed your eyes another *PING* came from your phone.

“Noah? I seen you on set today and asked one of your friends for your number?”

Set? What the hell. Who is Noah?!? You think of what to say for a second and reply. “Noah? I don’t know a Noah? And what set are you even talking about? Did Jace put you up to this? Because I swear to god that boy does not know when his match making skills are not wanted!”

With scrunched brows you began biting the corner of your nails, a bad habit your mother always fussed at you for, you await his reply. You scroll through your phone until you find Jave contact.

“Did you give some guy my number again? Who is Noah? Jace I swear to god I’m going to kill you!”

You get aggitsted and toss your phone beside you when he doesn’t reply. Flopping backward you then remember that it’s 3 o’clock in the morning so he’s probably sleeping like you had been before your phone woke you up.

Another ping from your phone had you picking it up with inhumane speed. It’s from Noah..

“Well I do believe you now know a Noah, so there’s that. I also believe that there may have been a mix up with your number 😂😂 I’m so sorry. I’m going to go ahead and bet that this isn’t Janelle? And as far as a Jace goes is it possible it’s the Jace that helps out with our hair and make up? He must’ve given me your number instead of Janelle’s.”

Jace has been helping out on movie sets since early last year and had recently landed a job back in February assisting on the set of a new film. He had dreamed of being a professional hair and makeup artist since we were little.

“Nope, not Janelle. My name is (Y/N). And yep that sounds like my Jace.”

“Oh... your Jace is it.. I’m sorry I thought he was... ya know what NVM.”

“OH HE DEFINITELY IS. I didn’t mean my as in Mine but he has been my best friend since we were kids.”

“That would be why he gave me the funny grin when he slipped me your number instead of Janelle’s I’m guessing😂.”

That little shit, you should’ve known he would find someone to try to play match maker with. You went back to your message with Jace that he has yet to reply, “IM DEFINITELY GOIJG TO MURDER YOU....”

Thinking of what to reply to Noah you type, “I’m really sorry. He has this thing where he swears one day he’s going to find my future husband. He has a Cupid complex it seems. I’m really sorry you thought I was someone else. I’m going to murder him, really.”

“It’s okay really. For a mixup this is going pretty well. So you said your name was (Y/N)? That’s gorgeous. Is there a face I can put to the name? “

Your eyes widen. Oh god. He wants a picture of me. Scrolling through your photos you let out a sigh. Dear god all of these are awful. Dan had a bad habit of taken photos at the worst angles of you.

You look at the mirror on your dresser and let out a shriek. Your hair was in a ponytail with a thousand pieces of hair sticking every where and yesterday’s makeup smeared under your eyes. You hop up and let your hair down running a brush through it and clear the makeup from under your eyes. With a shrug of your shoulders you turn back to your bed. This will have to do.

You plop back down on your bed and hug your pillow. You raise your phone and snap a picture. Looking at it you roll your eyes and groan.... this may take a while. Finally after about 50 different pictures you take one that’s decent. Hmm. I look kinda cute. You look at the photo. Your hair was slightly messy but framed your face. The ruminants of the make up under your eyes made them stand out. Not too bad.

You open your conversation with Noah and send the picture.

You bite away at your nails waiting for his reply... after a few you get nervous. “Sorry it’s awful. It’s way too late to be a try hard 😂.”

*PING*

Your eyes become as wide as saucers and you slowly pick up your phone to see what he replied.

“Damn.. I’m glad Jace slipped me your number..”

“Really? A sigh of relief slips your mouth. Soooo does that mean I get to put a face to your name?”

*PING*

Oh holy shit.... Noah as in Noah Centineo. What the actual fuck did Jace think he was doing...

What do you reply to that? Holy shit your fucking hot? Dear god you’re fine as hell? I’d like you to fuck me in to next week?? Like what response is accurate to a picture like that. They boy was fine and he knew it.

“Wow...” was all you could send..dumbfounded that Jace would even attempt to put you in the same league as someone as attractive as Noah.

“Wow? Is that a wow as in Jesus Christ stop talking to me or wow as in you would want to maybe meet up tomorrow? “ Wait.... was he serious??

Eyes wide you contemplate the options he has given you. No way in hell were you going to stop talking to him. Has he seen himself??

“I think I’d like the latter option.. that is if you were serious?”

“Of course I’m serious. Why don’t you come to the set with Jace tomorrow and we’ll go for some food after filming wraps?”

“See you then. We should probably get some sleep huh?”

“Goodnight (Y/N).”

“Night Noah. See you tomorrow.”

You fall back on your bed in your pile of pillows with a smile on your face..

You were still going to kill Jace though..

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Okay guys, so this is my first ever imagine/series that I’ve posted on here. Wanted to know what you guys think and if I should continue it? Maybe make it into a mini-series? Let me know what you think! Also requests are open if anyone has anything they want written!

Part 2 is up!