#im gonna go back to posting music and other things. lets stop thinking about this guy (yesterday he told me & my friend that he thinks hes

[inkskinned]

im gonna start a fight; and, at the same time, i need you to take this in the most good-faith way possible, but:

videos that involve body-checking and intentionally (and uncritically) show a mealplan of an unhealthy number of calories are just a revamped version of pro-ana food diaries.

and yeah, i know there's arguments. i address some of them under the cut. but at the end of the day, we're just coming back to romanticizing mental illness; we've just found a better platform for it.

this is already something we've done. we knew it was wrong and tried to stop it. and tbh. it just wasn't enough.

there are people who argue "well, what if you have an eating disorder, you can't help it if you don't eat!" except that as someone with an ED; we are not infants. we know what we're doing. part of having an ED is that you are like, maybe too self-aware. even if we can't help our own food choices, we don't need to fucking romanticize the disorder - something we've been warning you about since 2013. there are hours of setup, filming, and editing that go into these videos. they do not happen to fall into place randomly. there is a reason they are pieced together to be beautiful, bright, inspiring.

there's this woman who pretty much only posts daily plans under a normal amount of calories, and everyone defends her saying but it's better than nothing! and i'm like. except she opens those with images of her showing off her body and provides no context in the video or caption that suggests that she believes what she's doing is unhealthy. she has hundreds of thousands of followers on a platform designed for young kids and teens. i refuse to believe that by accident her content just happens to be cheery advice on "healthy" versions of starving.

for any other symptom of mental illness, we would be incredibly enraged by this kind of placid acceptance of a "tips and tricks" fast-start guide. imagine if people posted pink & pretty videos saying "best places to cut yourself" as if it was a fucking storytime. we, as a society, are so fucking fatphobic that we would rather accept blatantly harmful displays of self harm than admit that we are obsessed with a hyper-thin body type.

i am not suggesting someone never talks about their disorder. i talk about mine. actually, it's a plot point in my book.

here's the difference: i recognize it's a fucking mental illness. i am very careful to never mention a specific weight, eating pattern, or calorie plan. i always make sure to position it as something that ruined my fucking life. i do not put cheery music in the background and hearts and sparkles over my worst moments. i do not film it in bright light. i do not start each passage with an image of a thin body followed by "here's how to look like her."

eating disorders should not be framed as aspirational. and the problem is that society worships the "after" image, so long as you don't get too sick. there is a reason so many people who quit being "influencers" will later admit - i wasn't eating well that whole time; an obsession with food was completely destroying my life.

we let any uncredited, uncertified person write the most backwards, fucked up shit about how to get the body you desire! because the underlying, secret belief is: well, at least they're thin! and the real thing that fucking gets me each time - they make fucking money off of it. their irresponsibility and societal harm literally pays off for them.

"why do you care so much." "don't like it don't look." "so what if people experiment with new ways of thinking of food?"

thank you for asking. we're about to get extremely personal. it's because when i was 18 i discovered "thinspiration"/"thinspo." and it absolutely influenced, shaped, and codified my pre-existing eating disorder. i went from having some troubling habits and traits to being incredibly unwell within what felt like a matter of days. there were actual pages designed to train me on how to have an ED correctly. it was all so suddenly easy. i was sick; and the nature of the illness meant - i wanted to be sicker.

it takes an average of 7 years for a person to fully recover. i know this personally - even now, 10 years from the worst of it, i still fucking struggle. i am so much happier now and i eat what i want and i literally don't think about food at all (19 year old me would shudder) and yet - i still fucking know the calories of plain toast with butter.

an eating disorder is one of the deadliest types of mental illness. over 1 in 4 people with an ED will attempt suicide.

and i'm sorry. i just do not see the exchange rate of "high rate of engagement" versus "the value of a human life."

[brodieland]

Hai!!! could you please write hcs about Leo Valdez with a punk reader?

.˚ 𓈒 ࣪.𝝑𝝔 "Have I ever told you how good it feels to hold you..." ´ˎ˗

Leo Valdez x Fem!Dionysus!Reader Synopsis: Punk reader headcannons!!!! Warning(s): nothing I don't think, I might be reforming idk Word Count: 795 A/N: 2 post in one day?? grind never stops clearly. this made me realize that I listen to more punk bands than I thought I did (if u couldn't tell I get called emo at school), anyways I haven't done headcannons before, so this might be kinda trash, but these were really fun lowk

Leo Valdez was nothing but a curious guy

so when he was just strolling through camp and heard a loud thud in the Dionysus cabin, he had to check it out

he'd never been in there before, but he knew it shouldn't have been as messy as it was.

the cabin was covered in band posters, consisting of Green Day, Blink 182, and chuckled when he read one that said Buzzcocks.

that's when you noticed him standing by the door

"who're you?"

you had a fierce look on your face that made Leo gulp

"Uh, I'm Leo."

"cool, well whatever your doing, im busy looking for a lighter."

That's when you backtracked and walked toward Leo, and he felt really intimidated right now. like you were gonna shove him out, not like he knocked anyways

You had dark make-up, and darker clothes, and your blue hair was starting to fade hair.

"your the fire boy, right?" Leo just nodded

"gimme a lil fire would ya??" you demanded.

Leo sparked some fire from his finger as you held a needle over the flame, he just raised his eyebrow as you walked over to the mirror

leo's jaw just dropped as you pierced your belly button, giving no reaction

he may have just fallen in love

from that day forward you both started getting closer, becoming really good friends, and eventually start dating!!!!

you weren't as intimidating as you may have looked, your just a sweetheart in dark clothes

you guys hung out a lot in your cabin, since you only had one sibling who was almost never home

he would ask about your posters, asking to listen to some of your favorite music

it may not have been his favorite thing in the world, but you had a massive grin on your face as he listened so he went along with it just for you

(may or may not have slowly started liking it more and more)

he listens to your favorite songs on replay to learn the lyrics, so he could jam out with you (boyfriend material!!)

he lets you do your make-up on him

though he won't wear it out, its a cute gesture (you sit on his lap while you do the make up)

he's always down to match with his girl

even his nails, even if they quickly chip off the next day in the forge

its the thought that counts, he supposes

he helps you redye your hair, getting the spots in the back you can't reach very well

he even let you dye a matching streak in his hair

he literally could've give a flying fuck what people might think of you, or what you like, he loves you for you

defends you if someone makes a diss for you being "emo" (lets learn the difference guys!!!)

mans just a massive simp for his girl yk

when he noticed the electric guitar in your cabin, he absolutely demanded you play it

and he def recorded you playing as well

he showed the recording to his friends, bragging about how cool and hot his girlfriend is

his wallpaper is a 0.5 of you midway doing your makeup, so like one eye covered in black and the other one completely naked

he said it reminded him of like a panda or something, you just wished he'd take one where you didn't go crosseyed

you have a bunch of random stick n pokes, mostly just small little stars around your fingers and wrist, Leo helped with the ones on your dominant hand, since you couldn't do those yk

you tried convincing him to let you pierce his eyebrow, but needles, sadly, scare him (maybe one day!!!)

they're times when your room gets to messy with clothes, every now and then he catches himself stepping barefoot on one of your spiked bracelets

he takes it upon himself to clean up a little for you, and how grateful you are for your boyfriend

you wrote his name on the neck of your guitar, now whenever you play you see his name and think of him

you bedazzled some of his tools

and by bedazzled, you glued mini spikes on like the edges on the handle parts of his tools, and now they matched your bracelets

matching rings for sure

hes had to convince you not pierce your tongue at like 2AM, considering you had no idea what you were doing (this happened three times)

he surprised you with a Ramones poster for your birthday, one that you've been looking everywhere

you absolutely jumped on him thanking him

"Baby, I love you" by Ramones is your guys song

"Have I ever told you how good it feels to hold you, it isn't easy to explain"

[mrs-monaghan]

well, i see that your blog is cock friendly, and even tho its a jikook blog, there is something that i think we should adress (i'm not saying that this could be a reason for jk's crush, im not saying it could not), but...

Namjoon's cock!!!!! I suare, if everything in that body is proporcional, you know, i mean YOU KNOW he is fucking big!

Oh anon I really wish you hadn't gone there.

Now we must talk about JK and his anti Minimoni agenda. We now need to delve into this and get to the root of the issue. We must!

Jimin's hand on RM's lap.

JK: 👀

Love it. Okay let's take a look at some photos, shall we? Jimin's type.

Oh wait, before we proceed, JK's crush on RM i have never thought of it as an actual true crush. I think its played of as such for laughs. But I think JK just really admired him for his talents and what not and I don't think JK is attracted to RM in the slightest. Not even a little bit. Imo.

Now back to Jimin's type. 😁

Number 1) Wonho

Number 2) Black interviewer

Number 3) Usher

Number 4) JB who is basically JK's doppelganger in some of his photos 😅

Number 5) Gonna casually drop Tony

And last but not least Number 6) The main topic:

Jimin has a type. Okay? He likes them muscles and them thick men and them hot men and them arms and chests...and thighs... anyway, Mimi has a type. And while none of the men above hold a candle to his actual boyfriend, you can see the similarities.

Jungtiddies. Check

Thighs. Check

Arms. Check

The whole damn body. Check

Where I'm I going with this you ask? In short what I'm trying to say is, RM is Jimin's type. My friends and I disected this the other day and concluded the JK Minimoni thing probably has something to do with the fact that RM is Jimin's type to a T. JK looks at RM and sees himself. And then add the fact that RM is a genius and JK's insecurity goes through the roof!

(And like anon mentioned, JK has that Jungkonda, yes but on this post I also share what RM is working with so.... like I said. JK & RM, same thing basically 😂)

See, yeah, JK comes between Yoonmin and hates that Suga thirsts over his man. But, he is not threatened by short, skinny legged, with an ass almost as big as Jimin's, Min Yoongi. He knows Jimin will never see Suga that way. So he can dislike how Suga behaves with Jimin, but sometimes he even ignores it and doesn't look bothered at all. But when it comes to Minimoni he just has to insert himself. For eg, I saw something today.

Look at Jimin's face after JK adds in his 2 cents because of course he did

Minimoni moment, JK is like "not today Satan" He refuses for the audience to associate Jimin with RM and its the funniest shit. I mention here how JK inserted himself when Minimoni were practising the own it dance. Even though he wasn't really supposed to be there.

Disclaimer: The following opinions are my own, I will give them but please feel free to form your own

So listen. I will be the first person to tell people to stop treating the Tannies like characters in a fanfic. And I have mentioned many times that there has never been any in house dating (sans Jikook) That just wouldn't work and BTS wouldn't be together if that was the case. So please, please try not to read too much into the following tiny analysis. It's just something a friend pointed out to me and I couldn't believe it myself. It's short and quick, easy to miss. But it shows just how deep this thing with JK and Minimoni goes.

Okay so In the Soop season 2 episode 3 around 6 minutes in. (Thanks @serendipitous-sky)

Jin tells JK to go wake up either Jimin or V. Of course JK goes to wake up Jimin. Duh!

Sidebar, this isn't the point of my post, I just feel the need to point out that Jikook look at cameras ALOT. The whole time he climbed the stairs on the way to Jimin's room he was staring at that camera

If you guys remember correctly, Jimin was kind enough to switch rooms with RM the night before. RM couldn't sleep in the main house due to all the noise. So they swapped. But JK forgot this. So off he goes to what he thinks is still Jimin's room (he cheated/helped Jimin to get this room btw, but that's an analysis for another day) Anyway, back to JK looking for cameras.

If you're looking to mess around with your boyfriend and not get caught its important to find blind spots. So yes, Jikook are always making sure they know exactly where those cameras are. I'm sure y'all get it. 😏😏

Anyway, off he goes into the room and he's surprised to be greeted by RM's snores.

He forgot this wasn't Jimin's room anymore. But guys, here's my thing. JK is here, right? He has heard and seen that that is RM asleep in that bed, right? So you'd expect him to leave, right?

Wrong!! JK goes further into the room!

But why 🤭🤭🤭 that's my question. He had already established that was RM in the bed why did he need to go further into the room? What did he need to see? He literally has no reason to confirm it's RM in that bed when he already knows it is. So my guess is that he wanted to confirm RM was in that bed alone.

Now hear me out, even if Jimin was in that bed lying down fully clothed just shooting the shit with RM, it would not have gone down very well. At all. Shit, would have hit, the fucking fan!

We definitely wouldn't have go10 a season 2 of ITS or anymore BTS for that matter 🤭🤭 I'm just saying, for the sake of a million things, I'm glad RM was in there by himself.

JK as he's leaving says;

And off he goes to look for Jimin. We already know what happens after this. Nothing, coz we were robbed.

But anyway, conclusion: RM is the only one who actually threatens JK. And no this doesn't mean he doesn't trust Jimin. He knows Jimin would never but it doesn't stop him from wanting to make sure everyone most especially RM, remembers who Jimin 'belongs' to.

The End. Stan Namjikook for clear skin

[iwasbored777]

so ur trolls posts got me to watch trolls world tour again. i remembered liking it but i couldnt remember why, but now i know for sure

I FCUKING LOVE TROLLS WORLD TOUR!!!!!!!!!!!!

ALL THE INCREDIBLE WRITERS WERE SECRETLY ON TROLLS 2 !!!!!!’n

I CANT TBINK OF A SINGLE FLAW IN TROLLS WOULD TOUR!!!!!!!

i was NOT expecting a brilliantly written masterpiece about colonialism, but thats what i got, and its going in the greatest of all time hall of fame in my brain forever.

im not gonna sit here and regale you on the message of the movie. they only said fax, no printer, and its an important message to send kids. alot of the messages kids get about races and borders is “we are all the same 😚” but they came in with the “we are NOT the same and that is both good and bad, both exciting and dangerous so you need to be aware of dangerous ideas of “harmony”” and thats so real. kids need to understand differences are OK.

i love how they backed off the “chosen one” vibe poppy had in the first movie and talked about her flaws as a leader. while her stubborness was a good thing in the first movie to contrast branches pessimistic nature, it wouldnt have worked here, and i can see a cheap writer (like m*chael w*ldron) either insisting she gets away with her selfishness and carrying on with the happy ending anyway, or pretending that wasnt a character trait at all (because w*ldron doesnt watch the first movie and writes a sequel anyway)

my favorite scene is the bubble scene and the woods right after they leave funk where branch confronts poppy. do i even need to tell you why?

i just want to mention it because im pretty sure branch sings a cover of “girl crush” by little big town, which is a country band, and branch said he likes country music earlier and that slays. but when poppy comes in, what they sing is definitley not girl crush, and i cant tell if its giving “trolls can mix music” or im completley wrong and its a different song alltogether. but i cant tell if that song is homophobic or is super gay, so if im wrong thats prob for the best.

the only flaw i can think of is the country music, as a midwestern i can confidently say that was an affront to real blue grass country music. i guess born to die “works” but it didnt represent country as well as the other genres did. theres alot of controversy in the country music fandom with alot of singers who sound exactly the same and produced like its a factory line. but even if people still think miranda lambert and carrie underwood arent true country singers, their songs wouldve worked better than born to die. also the country trolls shouldve been on a self sufficient farm instead of the wild west. that wild western jazzy piano and country music isnt the same.

the only bad part about the movie is that it ended and barb ATE. SHE LEFT NO CRUMBS WITH THAT INTRO. send ask.

Lol I love your review. I love Trolls World Tour a lot too and all their other movies. Great stuff.

And yeah I love Poppy and how she can accomplish A LOT but she doesn't make it on her own, she needs character development and help from others just like everyone else. Characters are surprisingly realistic.

Barb really was goat, the best antagonist in the franchise. I love parallels between her and Poppy, how both had different intentions (Poppy wanted to help and Barb wanted to conquer) but Poppy's method was also wrong and both Poppy and Barb and everyone had to make compromises for all tribes to live in harmony because no one has to change their lifestyle for that to happen, all they have to do is accept that they're different and that's perfect. Just be yourself and let others be themselves.

That song in the end (Just Sing) slaps hard (and so does Can't Stop The Feeling btw).

P.S. Tiny Diamond fucking slays 🔥🔥🔥

[oldmemoria]

lmao i fucking forgot to share this

not only do i have unorganized miguel heacanons but i have unorganized HOBIE ones too

i have unorganized random headcanons for all the characters i brainrot over these two are no different!!

identity headcanons first hehe:

hes trans. he probably diyed his hrt and also has top surgery somehow hes magic. (i also think he'd have tattoos over his scars, either super cool bat/devil wings or an intricate spider design on their whole abdomen cant decide ill draw it later 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉)

he, however, doesnt really have any specific sexuality or gender labels they feel like they fit into. theyre attacted to all genders of varying degrees but doesnt really put a label on it. he just exists.

also doesnt mind what pronouns you use for her. any/all. basically.

also also would encourage people to use the weirdest and coolest neopronouns they can think of for zem like REALLY go out there WHATEVER YOU CAN THINK OF.

ADHD haver?? MAYBE???

to the rest acaksdlfj;akdjf:

theyre very crafty and dabble in basically every form of art. music, graffiti, painting, sculpting (mainly with trash or scraps or random discarded items he finds, more on that later on), sewing, whatever. if he can learn to do it she will.

he is super touchy and likes being close to people, but also understand boundaries.

very emotionally intelligent, i feel like this is canon anyway but ill just put it out there, ze can basically sense if someone is upset.

LOVES ABSOLUTELY LIVES FOR talking to new people, will go out of their way to introduce himself to basically everyone, especially new spider-people she meets.

he is a bit of a joker, ofc, but he wont try and push boundaries that he clearly sees or hears from the person theyre talking to. hi people who hc him as being an unself aware dickhead shut up you are very wrong did you even watch the movie.

this one is probably my favorite but he will pick up random things he sees around him and keep them for art projects. cool rock on the sidewalk? its a rock, hes gonna take it. funny lookin bug? might pick it up for a little to look at it and put it back in a safer spot. bottle cap? "mine now". like i said before he likes using litter to make art.

he will stop mid-mission if he sees something cool that he can take home like "oh [riff] cool leaf" and put it in his pocket.

i was referencing this post btw i love this headcanon, absolutely genius, i will steal it ty /lhj

this stealing of random objects from all around the multiverse has caused many lectures for miguel (they arent listening)

they have some kind of control over what texture/color they turn into if xey really think about it but most of the time he just kind of.. lets it do its thing. (sort of like a RainWing?)

shockingly good at vague yet oddly specific threats that are unrealistic but if you really think about it it's like "oh yeah he could totally do that..." but she wouldn't. yknow what im saying right???

while he does live in the 70s where technology was uh... not as popular nor as advanced as they are now, he's aware of modern tech through Gwen, Miles, Pav, DEFINITELY through Margo and Miguel, but she doesn't really use it often. doesnt really see the point.

along with that he also is aware of modern music as well, he has mixed feelings (gwen is probably the biggest influence though she is such a Pinkshift/Paramore/My Chem girlie it hurts to think about)

100% collects record of artists, especially smaller artists, that they like.

if you get them going about music he will talk for HOURS. HOURS until you tell him to shut up, even though fae totally wont listen and will keep going anyway. (just like me teehee projecting is fun <3 )

while hobie does use his guitar as a weapon for some reason he is quite protective of it. they wont try and stop you from touching it or playing it, but he will watch you like a hawk. half out of "oo look another person is interested in guitar" and the other half of "👁️👁️ dont break it i can only do that /j" (a lot of musicians are like that, i would know, im one of them. ha)

loves stray animals. cats, dogs, birds, anything. he will stop to pet them if they let him.

he also will talk to cats like any other person. especially spider cat. spider cat could make a cat noise and he'd act like he understood it. "yeah totally man, i get it. meow."

he can sing like... averagely? he has a good sense of pitch and timing, as most musicians do, but she isnt professionally trained or really does it too often

they will scream though

also really likes messing with makeup and bodypaint. he will spend hours on it if he can.

FUCK I AM SO HAPPY I DIDNT POST THIS IMMEDIATELY BECAUSE I KEEP REMEMBERING THINGS ACK HERES ONE LAST ONE POST THIS AFTER ASH I SWEAR (edit from two weeks later: i forgor): he definitely isnt a morning person. he loves to sleep in. definitely values rest, like a lot. miguel will call him at like 7 am and hobie will flip him off and say 5 more minutes when they really mean 2 more hours.

do i have any more?? hmmm maybe if i remember but this is what i have so far. mostly just silly lil headcanons that arent entirely plot relevant as most of my headcanons are.

[scandeniall]

Nvm this interlude

A/n: I post a solid 3 times a year at this point but I’m back at it again with rn rnb!hq agenda. Iwa is Bryson coded inspired by/quoted song. F!reader. Black coded but no real descriptors (mention of changing hair )

Previous rnb!hq pieces: 1 2

Warnings: as usual 21+, language, suggestive, not edited and from someone who hasn’t written on here since Feb (thanks for the love on the last post tho!)

musician!Iwa pens several songs about you long before yall are ever together. He has wanted you for the longest time fr, like damn near from the day he met you. So when yall become friends and ultimately end up “talking” he makes his intentions real clear through not only his words but in his music. Too bad he’s inconsistent.

“Come here,” Hajime pats his lap motioning for you to sit. “Want you to hear this track.” You couldn’t help but eye him with curiosity from your place on the other side of the couch. He’d come back into town a week now and just now found his way over to your place. With you lack of movement he repeated the action, this time reaching for your hand to assist.

“I can listen from over here.”

Hajime can’t help but let out a low laugh. “Just want you to be a bit more comfortable” You don’t miss the way his eyes trail over your attire. Sleep shorts and a tight tank. Once again he reaches for you, a smirk gracing his features when you oblige.

Once seated one of his hands immediately finds itself on you. Slipped under your tank resting heavily on your skin, his other hand reaches for his phone to hit play”

I got thing to say, I gotta talk to you

Touch down, I just touched down

Guess I gotta start the hunt down

“Its an interlude” he hums out bobbing his head at his work. You nod as you continue listening.

Tryna be a better man

Came to tell you that we gotta stop fuckin’ round

"But you look good, I wanna fuck now

Make these other bitches seem basic"

Those words are said directly into your ear his hand starting to massage at the skin around your stomach.

You a goddess you gracious

The other hand that had been holding the phone comes to the side of your face forcing eye contact for the next part.

Im tryna stop you from being famous

From rappers knowing what your name is

I’m barely famous and I hate it.

Iwa maintains eye contact for the remainder of the track. The two of you sit in silence after the song in. His hands running softly at your skin as you sigh.

“What you think. It’s about you.” You nod knowingly trying to formulate the words. He’s essentially acknowledged the back and forth yall had been having for the last several months.

He comes, fucks you and goes all ghost while insisting he cares about you a lot. He knows it’s selfish but can’t stay away from you. He also notice you started taking longer to hit him back up and that you’d been going out more with your friends. Looking as good as ever he couldn’t help but heart react as you’d show your body off in the mini skirt or when you’d switch up your hair and nails.

“I’m glad you also know that you’re fucked up” you scoff attempting to get off his lap.

He doesn’t let you nor does he let the words cut “I been scared. Scared to commit, but I havent slept with anyone since we started”

That revelation causes you to freeze in surprise and gives him the chance to help you shift so that you could face him. Like magnets his hands find their way back onto your body, settling on each one of your thighs.

“Haiji-“

“I’m serious (Y/N). It’s been you since the day we met and I’ve been telling you this. But I know if I step out with you your life is gonna change. You know all the shit that’s been going on with me.”

The seriousness in which he speaks to you makes you listen. You’re usually privy to a different side of him. The joking side, the one who isn’t hiding from interview requests and performing on dark stages.

“Of course i know. And that’s why since the day we met I’ve been careful. But Hajime it hurts when you come over here pretend you care and then it’s weeks before I even get a simple text back.”

He’s listening to your words carefully. Thinking. He knows that no matter his response there’s no going back to how you were.

“I’m sorry,” he mumbles taking a deep breath. “But, I wanna be with you. For real. You gonna let me?”

Your eyes search his for any uncertainty but find none. At your nod one of his hands trail up your back. Resting on your cheek he urges you closer until your lips touch.

“Won’t make you regret this baby”

[sesamie]

im curious as to your songwriting process, do you start with lyrics first or a melody or kinda both? how easy so you find all the different parts of a song are to compose?

wellllll good question! i don't really have a process. usually i come up with a concept and start thinking of phrases that i feel or think about that concept, then write those down, like for cd's lament this was the original thoughts i wrote down earlier tonight while i was playing minecraft:

knowing i could either chop this up later and make a poem souffle or a song pie or something. i always try and write down phrases i come up with just in case they might be useful later; i have a whole channel in my personal just-me discord i use for it:

really just any and everything nice that pops into my brain i'll write it down in case i can use it later!

once i have those sort of base phrases and concepts written i start thinking of how i would want the song to sound - if a phrase has a natural musicality due to the meter of the words, i'll usually base it around that. i have an easier time just coming up with a melody and humming it into a recording (i can improvise this quite easily) than i do actually writing down notes and chords and whatnot. usually i come up with a vocal melody and use the guitar to just back it however it fits. if it needs it, i'll think about my other instruments (currently writing a clarinet duet but gd knows when i will be brave enough to record that or even finish it for that matter) but usually i just consider everything a demo (which is short for demonstration which is good to remember! it's just a demonstration! that's just kinda sorta how it's supposed to sound! nothing is ever finished!) and leave it all very unpolished.

if i think i'm gonna forget something in the middle of songwriting (i also lose melodies easily) i record myself singing or humming just that part. and to write lyrics i just let it happen as it happens like poetry and then i go back and restate things to make it fit the meter and whatnot. generous use of rhymezone, not necessarily for rhymes but more for inspiration on how to word things or extra concepts i can pull from if i need more than what i have.

then i do chords, and change the melody and chords until i have something i like, then i write that down, and record that demonstration

then i go and try to record an uploadable version! it usually takes me a couple tries - if i mess up, i stop and start again. once i do it all the way through without fumbling too hard i just upload it, i almost never actually listen to them before uploading them, cause if i made a big mistake, i wouldn't have recorded to the end anyways. then i put it on soundcloud and tumblr and then embarassedly delete it off tumblr and then post it again on tumblr and then dm it to my single friend who asked to hear all the songs i upload. and then yeah!

i almost ALWAYS do the full process in one sitting. i might be thinking about a song for a long time beforehand, but the sitting down to write and record process usually happens all in one.

[fatmaclover]

12,19 or 23 for mac :-3?

12: What's a headcanon you have for this character?

unibrow mac my beloved <33 if we're talking something more serious though i think itd be that hes got. COMICALLY gay music taste. fag club music is definitely his jam but hes got to get into gaga n shit for my own mental health. this is supported by the fact that in its a very sunny christmas (sorry to bring this ep up again) he literally has TWO rainbow jimi hendrix stickers on his closet door 😭 bud.... howd it take you this long youre literally making your own allegories 😭. sorry im gonna take this one to also say i think he should be More tatted up. rob you can rid yourself of your tats all you want but i know mac gets a tattoo for every boyfriend hes able to keep for longer than a week in my heart. their name right on his skin. this is Always what makes them break up with him.

19: A relationship they have in canon that you don't like?

i feel like "like" is a pretty broad thing for me. i can fucking despise something but it can still be interesting and i still like it. UNFORTUNATELY this is the case about mac and his parents. dear God actually a wretched family dynamic that attacks literally all of my insecurities with some of my own family. something about always making noise, always making a show but never being seen or heard really gets to me. the way even now mac makes it blatantly obvious what hes needing/wanting for emotional fulfillment, but his friends treat him just like his parents did because thats easier than sitting down and dealing with his issues. hes always been ignored so whats a little more?

theres a lot i could go into with this one. how being ronnie the rat was the only time mac would get seen, so of course he was incentivized to keep being a total snitch. how it seems that even joyce ended up adopting those methods against mac, being plenty apathetic towards things that were important to him (not even saying that her blowing him off is undeserved. its very much deserved even if its still a total dick move and heartbreaking that joyce would actively see the environment mac grew up in, and then decide to keep that cycle going for him). the way macs immediate family has interacted with him has affected. so much of his life that its insane. sorry that i wrote a lot about this one its just been on the mind.

oh i suppose i could also say him and carmen. i love you carmen i wish mac was normal you two would be unstoppable as a tgirl and her pet doberman fag duo. im glad youre happy just raising a kid with ur husband tho pls never come back and enjoy your life away from these freaks

23: Favorite picture of this character?

here are the jokey contenders oh my fucking god im sorry. theyre the like basic bitch mac images but theyre so fucking funny to me i think about them 24/7. literally whenever i bring up if im soying over something i want you to picture the second image thats what im doing

for a more serious answer, genuinely i adore nearly every scene fat mac is in. though i suppose the penultimate image of fat mac WOULD be the how mac got fat one

sorry hes like an angel to me here. in the grimy fuckin confessional n all.

i think this one is like. very easily first more than that other one but my shame makes it tied for first instead

sorry. ill stop. dont give me power by letting me post mac images i will empty my whole camera roll going "and isnt he so cute here? and here? and look at his smile here. and look how cute he and joyce are here" until literally every frame of fat mac or mac and joyce in frame together is posted.

fav img of mac and joyce together is them writing in mac and charlie write a movie. purely because i associate it with you and rambling about joyce and joymac for hours. without that association is the fucking cowboy photoshoot from mac and charlie die. sorry. basic answer there too

[yuukei-yikes]

Okay okay okay I have a very specific itch to hear about Mekakushi Dan sensory needs and bc you're the first person I can think of who has drawn them stimming I thought your askbox was the perfect place to launch myself. If you have thoughts here pls feed me. Bonus points for Takane's sensory needs + challenges before becoming a computer program and post str bc I do think her needs would be different than they were before?? I think not having a body for 2 years would do that to you

HI ok i dont have a lot of headcanons in general its mostly haruka and takane and mostly takane. i think haruka is the one ive drawn stimming the most Like i just think that guy would flap his little hands around yknow.

so im sorry i dont have hcs for the whole mekadan. IF UR INTERESTED IN A PARTICULAR MEKADAN GUY u can ask me and I'll come up with something >:3 it just feels overwhelming to think of it all at once. and also u said takane and you know damn well im abt to talk for 1 million hours

ok. takane❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ sorry this isn't sensory needs but girl.. takanes Gamer Secret being found out... idk man it's like. this bitch had been MASKING‼️‼️‼️

even in hs days i think takane feels weird about Touching with her hands. she doesn't have the cartoonishly large sleeves she has as ene, but i think she pulls down her sleeves over her hands like in this specific manga panel i indeed have in speed dial

i wish it appeared more often bc its a cute shoutout to ene later on and also WOOO THIS BITCH HAS SENSORY ISSUES!!! i made a comic abt it once but haruka designing actor with the bigass sleeves because he observed that takane pulls down her sleeves. *bite bite bite bite bite* also this panel has always been a fave of mine bc of autism creature takane and also bc the desk is like. at haruka's chest and he looks like he's sitting on the ground

i also think its very funny to imagine takane kicking ass in games while holding the controller with her sleeves over it and everyone's like ?????girl what. ofc she probably has specific textures she hates and all that, takane doesnt feel weird about touching as a whole.

in several instances of yuukei yesterday haruka and takane casually touch each other and while thats obviously cuz they're close friends, a lot of close friends dont act that way or arent comfortable with touch yknow!! in fact takanes the one to start most physical interactions with him. i could be crazy enough to go and check but im gonna trust my memory. and bc i love art where ene is jumping on shintaro and stuff i like to think takane is Actually touchy with ppl she trusts. also she doesnt register personal space sometimes, and ends up standing too close without noticing until someone points it out. i guess this is a bit contrary to a typical takane interpretation (UR STANDING TOO CLOSE DUMBASS🙄🙄🙄🙄 tsundere moment) but i think it's a fun spin to it. i think kenjirou is the one to most point it out like Girl step BACK ur all in my zone and she's like UGH WHATEVER and haruka also notices but never rly says anything. he probably loves it lol haruka's so overdue physical connection he loves that takane doesn't mind touching him or being close to him. also since they have a big height difference its not like she's all up on his face. i think takane starts letting go more once her ene secret's out and stops caring so much but it sorta comes back when ayano and shintaro join the group. i think shintaro especially would point out UGH WHY ARE YOU STANDING SO CLOSE TO ME or even question why she's so close to haruka or ayano. haruka and ayano are all like NOOO DONT WORRY I DONT MIND but takanes already mortified and is more self aware

another one. takane with her big old headphones. yeah yeah uses them disconnected to get haruka's attention Whatever she also uses them bc she prefers hearing stuff muffled instead of hearing it directly 👍 when she gets overwhelmed she puts those things on with the music to the max and just logs out for a min

OH also this is a canon one😼😼😼 her leg bouncy thing. shintaro points it out in the seventh novel that takane is bouncing her leg and says it's a nervous habit he never noticed on her but TO ME. SHE DOES THAT❤️ takane has huge leg bouncer energy i bet she makes the whole table shake and everyone asks her to quit it and she says Damn ok sorry and stops it for a total of 50 seconds before starting again

anyways in summary hs takane is like. tends not to notice personal space, hates touching stuff with her hands, likes having control over what or how she hears, and has a tough time staying still. POST STR... its all to the max. takane is overly aware of everything. all 5 senses are as much of a nightmare as they are a relief and it's all mixed together!!!!

ok her sensory needs that she already had pre ene are still there but completely amped up, except the personal space one. now everyone is always too close and literally just opening her eyes (HEH!! OPENING EYES!!!!) is super overwhelming bc WHOA EVERYTHING IS SO CLOSE AND HUGE AND HD. i could imagine comparing it to like, wearing contacts for the first time for any fellow glasses wearing people. like u know this, youve seen all this. but suddenly youre watching it differently without a frame around ur eyes and it just feels weird. for takane the frame was a screen instead of the glasses yknow. and to her its A LOT

i think post str takane keeps using her powers and having meltdowns because on top of all the existentialism she has to deal with being alive and everything, suddenly She Cannot Control Anything And It Is A Nightmare. she can't handle the lack of control she has over her needs and body temperature. just feeling hungry or sweating after walking for a little in summer makes her upset. bc she gets her body back during summer so GOOD LUCK WITH THAT GIRL. the clothes she wears feel all insane and irritated and nauseous!!! awful!!! even showers feel strange bc AUGGHHH so much is touching her at once!!! she also hates eating soooo yeah also a thing. i think she's always been a picky eater but post str its like she will only eat like 2 things or something

ON THE OTHER HAND.... it suddenly goes on the opposite end. like for a few days she's nightmare overstim city and then she's SUPER understim and COMPLETELYYYYY over eager about having a body and horribly indulges in like. overeating and running around <- overeating (especially when u usually avoid eating), awful for ur tummy. running a lot when u have chronic pains, also awful for ur pains later. sooo nothing she wont pay the price for later. it needs to get pointed out to her she needs to find a balance and cant have all or nothing (by haruka probably)

the personal space thing comes back here like she gets So touchy and needs hug or death. i think she can be all happy hugging haruka and all of a sudden pushes him away and is like WHOA I NEED TO GET OUT OF MY BODY RIGHT NOW MAYBE RIP MY SKIN OFF TOO MAYBE so it's rly like a light switch all of a sudden she can get overwhelmed with it and revert. like jumping back and forth between seeking and avoiding sensation.

i drew this once but haruka with his arms inside of takane's sleeves LOLLL i think skin to skin rly helps her when she's feeling like she needs sensation. a big part of the sudden overindulgence is OUGH IM REAL!!!! bc like i said takane isnt just dealing with having a body again she's dealing with having her Life again. being alive again. and she LOVES being alive. and the avoidance of all these sensations sometimes piles up and ends on the opposite like I NEED TO EAT💥💥💥I NEED TO SCREAM💥💥💥💥I NEED TO RUN AND HUG AND KISS AND DANCE AND SWIM💥💥💥 yknow. so yeah haruka helps her a lot with it when she needs touching and hugging 🙏🙏🙏 cuz he also wont get offended if she's suddenly like Ok get away from me before i explode🙏

also post str takane To Me also has mobility issues like haruka does bc all her muscles are atrophied from yknow Not moving for 2 years so it's like, even more that she has to deal with. physical therapy is incredibly invasive to her too so it's extra difficult. i think haruka and her do it together and that's why haruka is so on top of what's going on with her, he's the closest and sees her whenever she's the most vulnerable. also their situations are So similar they cant help just gravitating to each other for support. i also think haruka's the one to always point out to her when she's overindulging like Hey i love that ur rly enjoying that bigmac but i can already see you wanting to rip out ur organs later tonight so maybe dont eat a third one.

anyways ermmm takane's biggest challenge is Stop resorting to opening eyes whenever it gets too bad. like i also got sensory issues and assuming whoever is reading also does imagine having the option to just Jump out of ur body when its feeling Awful. ofc ur gonna take it when ur feeling like that. but it doesn't help takane to do it. while it helps her to calm down, it's not good in the long run. she actively wants a PHYSICAL life and work on all this. takane never wanted to die and is super motivated to get better but it's not quick or easy!!! eventually she finds a good balance i think. she's still a rly touchy person who hates grabbing her phone directly without the sleeves in the middle and will only eat like 3 things❤️ but also a hug lover❤️

[onlytibki]

YGO Band AU

please bear with me because I know negative things about music

It starts, as all things do, with a game. Grandpa makes the mistake of introducing this newfangled game set-up called a "Wii" to his shop. Yuugi isn't normally a video game type of guy but Jounouchi saw the drum kit for Rockband and wanted to try it out

Yuugi heard the words cooperative game with no magic involved and went "oh finally a chance to relax with my friends"

Turns out! Gameifying music uncovered latent interest and talent and the next thing you know the whole crew has a band together.

Yuugi on guitar and vocals. He was a bit hesitant about singing in public (his voice strays between mid- to high-range) but having his friends join in on the chorus helps remind him that it's all in fun. As for guitar... he's very skilled, for someone with itty bitty baby hands that can't always reach across the bridge.

Yami Yuugi and Yami Bakura as Hatsune Miku type holograms. They've only just figured out how to be visible to the world and still can't actually pick up an instrument without possessing their others. So Yami records his bit on the bass and with low vocals beforehand and he uses the shadows as an illusion of an instrument during performances.

Yami only showed an interest in the game at first but then his dramatic ass heard Disturbed's cover of Hello Darkness My Old Friend and THAT got him hooked. Their cover of that song was the first video to go viral.

Bakura thought this whole thing was incredibly dumb but like hell was he gonna let the Pharaoh show him up and oopsie now he's a regular feature. Death metal screaming. Sometimes flicks Yami on the back of the neck during recordings and hoh boy the number of fights they've had to stop.

Ryou is also on pianist and vocals. For his vocals, think the chick from Evanescence. NOT to be trusted with dancing, this boy is far too anemic and clumsy and WILL collapse after one spin and WILL require an ambulance. So he takes over the piano bits while Anzu dances.

Jounouchi on drums, which he loves, because he's got the perfect hair for headbanging. Also, it's a great way to exercise his control: if this fightin' boy slammed the drums with all his strength he'd break them, so he's gotta stay careful. It adds to the challenge for him and he loves it. He doesn't sing a lot but throws in during call and response bits--when they do Bohemian Rhapsody he gets to solo shout in his Brooklyn accent " 'E'S JUSTA POH BOI FROMA POH FAM'LY SPEH 'IM 'IS LIFE FROM DIS MON-STROS-IDDY"

Anzu on keyboard (she was already trained long before Yuugi picked up a Rockband guitar). Can't vocally carry a tune to save her life, so joins Jou on call and response. She's in charge of choreography and works them like a drill instructor--every once in a while one group of 2-3 or another will leave their instruments and dance while the others continue. Ryou takes over as pianist while she's dancing. Also takes on the responsibility of outreach and gig signing, partnering up with Honda, who does logistics. It's great practice for when she becomes a professional dancer.

Honda does logistics. He's the only one with access to a van and he's entirely tone deaf, so he carts them everywhere, and manages the Youtube account, and makes sure everyone eats and sleeps and doesn't challenge anyone to a Shadow Game over who ate the last brownie Yami and Bakura.

They start out doing covers and posting them on Youtube, and their song list is all over the goddamn place. They start out with the whole Rockband set list and then do songs that interest any one of them.

Which means emo/screamo from Ryou and Bakura (and also Yuugi, sometimes), pop from Anzu, rock from Jou, and some truly wild shit that Yami found down a youtube rabbit hole at 3am while Yuugi was sleeping.

[crymea-river]

4/26/2024

leap years are for remembering

god sometimes i read the things i used to write on here or even in my old journals and i cringe (for lack of a better word) at how seriously i was taking things. this page is such a time capsule. i love it, im glad ive documented my feelings over the years but it makes me feel… weird. nostalgia is so interesting.

im having a really good and also strange time with (what i assume is) my adult brain. good bc i can trust my judgement better than i have ever been able to; things just make sense in an innate way now, a way that i struggle describe. strange bc i feel like i know myself less than i ever have but also way more than i ever have at the same time ? im the same person i was at 11 and 12 and 13 and 17 and 18 and 22, and its so crazy to me how different all these ages felt but theyre all me. they didnt really go anywhere, theyre all still inside me. i remember being 22 and still feeling relatively connected to my high-school-self but then just 2 years later i felt decades removed from her. and now i feel decades removed from my 22-year-old-self. the way i would reminisce on 2016 in 2020 is how im reminiscing on 2020 now. lol leap years are for remembering, i guess.

ive found myself reverting back to a lot of things i used to do and enjoy in adolescence. lots of silly topical things, like using pantene instead of all these expensive hair products ive tried over the years. i loved the way it made my hair smell back then and it made it so soft and who cares if it coats my hair in silicon or whatever ill just clarify it every few weeks itll be fine. im also finally letting myself enjoy things from back then that i was afraid to fully embrace for fear of being judged. thats a Huge fun part about getting older i’ve noticed, not caring what others think. id have told you back then that i didnt care about that, and on the surface i didnt. but it would get to me to some degree. i think my music taste from back then is a prime example of that (im not gonna elaborate i know what i mean).

i hope im making 11 and 12 and 13 year old me proud. and i want to tell 16 and 17 and 18 AND 19 year old me it gets better, but also to stop taking such trivial things so seriously maybe. life does not revolve around having a boyfriend (or whatever youd call those fuckers from back then). itll happen when its meant to and it will be so worth it. no one knows what they want at those ages. i barely knew what i wanted until it fell into my lap to be honest, and that only happened after i stopped yearning so hard for that shit and began TRULY enjoying my own company (and my friends’ obviously. love them). this is not where i wanted to go with this, i didnt want to talk about men. i think thats what cringes me out so bad about my old posts/entries, theyre allllllll (mostly) about bOyS. which was age appropriate i GUESS but idk it just caused me so much unnecessary stress lol. i learned eventually, and im glad i did so when i did.

all this to say im very happy. and peaceful. and i love the people i have surrounded myself with. i love being in love and i cannot describe in actual english words how thrilled i am that its with will. even 4 years into it.

being 26 is just so strange i think

[only-forr-me]

i hate that i remember the first thing you said to me. you told me i had a perfect nose and it was so cute because you were drunk and seemed like you didn't know how to talk to girls. this was january 2018.

you slid in my dms in the worst way and i wasnt sure if you were dissing me or attracted to me. i wish i could find my old phone... im pretty sure you ghosted me but we had a brief little texting moment.

you weren't my priority that first year because we never talked i never got to know you.

then i see you posting things showing you care and are passionate. i always thought you were so handsome even out of my league. in second year we had a 1 minute interaction, you stopped by the party and hugged everyone, you seemed genuinely interested in my job. you kept your distance and left shortly after back to your girlfriend. i waited while you were in a relationship but i called you the love of my life for like 3 years. (2019-2022)

then summer 2022 comes. you are seeing a girl but are entertaining others. i hear from e that you think im so pretty, out of your league and care about the same issues and have the same music taste. it was so cute bc i said the exact same things about you. i go to visit (mainly for you) and i have so much confidence. we were off in our little corner because we both didnt know anyone. a girl was trying to flirt with you but you made me feel like i had all of your attention. you're not flirting back with me though making me really confused. you dance with me and the other girl confusing me but i let you go with her because im not gonna compete. it isnt until the end of the night when you are hammered that i realize you only wanted me. we're linking arms and we follow each other on spotify. you tell me you're gonna put a ring on it. i dont want to go to the after party because i needed to be up early the next day. you drag me down the street begging me to come (giving me the ick lol). some asshole says she aint all that but you dont even look at him. i said theres other girls there (as in go talk to that girl that you've been swapping me out for tn) and you say but i only want you there. as we part you say its like breaking up with your first love (me now being soooo jealous that he has felt this). i leave dissapointed because e's friend offered to walk me home but you didnt. you tell me youll take me to my errands in the morning which was a sign of the empty promises to come. honestly... you really gave me the ick that night but i let it slide because you were very drunk.

e tries to give you my number in case his phone dies but you dodge it. i realize now you probably still had my contact from first year and didnt want to embarrass yourself.

our first date happens a year later june 2023. i was so cold and non chalant that date. i was so nervous but also icked out from that summer and dealing with some strong avoidant tendencies. it was also hot i was wearing a coat and sweating and i wanted it to end because i didnt want you to see me sweating lol. you tell me that im so non chalant but you're nervous because you had a huge crush on me in first year. you tell me you used to plan what to say to me if we ran into each other in the library. you tell me you asked e what all of my favourite foods were and that you dropped the blueberries in the store. i played it off as if e hadnt told me. you bought a whole pack of lemonade juice boxes lmaooo and a fruit platter and napkins you were sooo adorable. i kept saying something stupid like i cant believe we never talked and you said even when you visited last year... i didnt want to hit on you in the club i know youre not like that you deserve to be treated special i want to make you feel special. i was so cold and aloof i wish i had been ready to receive that. what i would do to go back and relive that and change how i responded to all of the sweet things you said to me. our date was a series of unfortunate events because the park you wanted to go to was paid admission and it wasn't cute so i said lets go to the other park. we didnt know there was a festival going on so there was so much traffic on the way and no parking once we got there so we ended up going to a park back on the other side of the city. all together we were in the car for at least an hour. not to mention we were dressed for rain and then the sun decided to come out and start beating down on us. the date was only 2 hours. you tried to make it longer but i ruined it because i was so hot and nervous i just wanted to go home. you tell me im like a work of art and dont want to touch me. when we're on my street you tell me im the prettiest girl youve seen here in all these years. i roll my eyes and say thats bullshit but you push back and say im serious ive only seen you a handful of times and im still thinking about you 5 years later. me now wouldve just gushed but i wasn't ready and probably just rolled my eyes ruining the moment. we hug and i go inside and scream in confusion. i dont text you until a week later but in hindsight you also never texted me that week. i think you thought it went so poorly which is true, i almost didnt give you a second chance.

thankfully i did.

[transcendence-through-exposure]

Hello and welcome to my page (If anyone does see this) i want to start with an introduction.

let's just say my name is D and with alot of years of battling my own demons, I've finally have an understanding with them to live in balance with myself. i would delete all the posts I shared but after looking at them i realized how depressed i really was growing up. It's a place in my mind i had forgotten about until recently and has been building up for some time now, so I've come here to share.

For some reason it's a trigger to be asked if I'm okay. I can't fully say im happy, but im at a point where i just can't feel emotions like i used to. I tried the whole emotion thing after being numb for so long... And so far it's only caused problems. for example, I've recently opened myself to have new friends ( because I've only ever hung out with the same group of friends since i was a child.)

Lets say i work with music not gonna be too specific but i ended up working with a fundraising group who i will not name and discovered the world of sober bars. I don't wanna say i had a problem with alcohol or drugs but i realized what i had been doing to myself but that's another story i will share, I'm currently 5 years off drugs and 3 years no alcohol or soda (nothing too hardcore) just liked to party when i was younger guess it was a coping mechanism for me and when someone close passed i went down a spiral it was the only thing that kept me numb. I used to love that numb feeling and the flavor of alcohol.. i miss it sometimes but im definitely a better person without it. growing up i was always around alcohol, drugs, and gang members. Back in the day it wasn't entirely safe in my neighborhood but im getting off subject again so i will definitely write about that in a later blog.

Back to what i was talking about long story short i let people into my circle and i guess for some reason i have this tendency to wanna help people when i have nothing to give a quote i always remember is " never pour from an empty cup" and i like to say " im not a cup. I'm the person who guides the water to the cup." Meaning im here to build you up, a way to turn the flow to fill up the cups of others. I don't know if I'll ever have a true happiness. again, it's a trigger and truly makes me cry sometimes even though im usually really good with not feeling anything.

Kinda why i started my career in music. It was a new version of me that i chose in my pursuit of happiness. I can honestly say if it wasn't for music i wouldn't be here right now. it's better than any drug or alcohol and gave the feeling of pure serenity. I want to show people that there's a world that cares for you even when there's no one around. When you need that conversation but dont have anyone to talk to. It's crazy to think that a total stanger can talk through this beautiful art to your soul and be able to heal from it.

I think that's enough for tonight it's about 3AM and started this on the beach (where i usually go to throw all my negative thoughts). I'm tired, ive been more tired than usually recently but i don't let it stop me from getting things done most of the time i dont want to. but i always push myself to get it done. Growing up depressed i learned to cope with it so i really dont feel emotions as hard as I used to

ps. Im not sad or happy im just good enough to get through everyday knowing that we're all destined for greatness, I'm more at peace with myself and understand my feelings. Im self centered, in balance with my thoughts and emotions. hope i can help others whether it be a story, music or personal poetry.

Ok now im done, Thank you so much for reading, hope to see you again peace and love ☯️ .

[thanatos-nightshade]

I posted 14,052 times in 2022

That's 5,524 more posts than 2021!

13 posts created (0%)

14,039 posts reblogged (100%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@olivegardenmenu

@willworkforcakes

@shpider

@tigerintherain

@seeyouguyslater

I tagged 762 of my posts in 2022

#ohshc - 11 posts

#fashion - 9 posts

#come back to this - 9 posts

#listen - 7 posts

#t-n talks - 6 posts

#art ref - 5 posts

#tbd - 5 posts

#food - 5 posts

#lmao - 5 posts

#screaming - 5 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#a nutshell sorry not sorry also im not bragging about my artistic skills because for realsies i'm just slightly above average on them so li

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

I finally did some art.

1 note - Posted March 3, 2022

#4

when you get this you have to answer with 5 things u like about yourself, publicly. then, send this ask to 10 of your favorite followers (non-negotiable, positivity is cool)

I'm fucking adorable. I guess like shallow/narcissistic but more along the lines of generally I like how I look. There are some things that I don't like but they don't perturb me that much. Generally I think I'm adorable/cute and I like that but have the occasional issue with grander adjectives like beautiful/sexy that we won't get into because liking myself is enough.

I like that I'm good at art?? I'm not like fantastic but aaah to make this easier on me this can lead into my next one

I like my jack-of-all-trades thinking in that I don't really try to HONE one craft and instead try to experience things generally. For example, when it comes to art, I'm not that great digitally or traditionally, or musically, theatrically, or other. HOWEVER I have experience in all these areas ranging from oil paints, watercolors, ceramics, theater workshop, drama, choir, dance, sewing, crafts etc does gymnastics count? jk whatever So I like that I have not only had all the opportunities to try these but that I have tried to work on each of them a moderate amount we're working on sewing and crafting it's my lowest art stat rn followed closely by instruments

Let's see, I like my friend choices. I feel like all the friends I've made have been pretty good. Some have stuck around more than others but any friend GROUP that I've stuck with for a period of time like months to years, I always think about fondly. I don't think I've ever had like an insanely toxic friend or like a friend that would back stab me does that make me the toxic friend? Anyways, I feel like a lot of my life is colored by the friends/people I've surrounded myself with and yeah sure not all of my life is great but I made some nice friends and had some good shenanigans wherever I went.

Last but not least, I like my absolutely self indulgent/self insert nature. Listen, there is like no fandom that I have been a part of where I have NOT self inserted myself into in some way or another and god damn it NOBODYS GONNA DO THAT SHIT FOR YOU UNLESS YOU PAY THEM. I CAN PUT MYSELF INTO MY FAVORITE FANDOMS FOR FREE AND BY GOLLY I'M GONNA DO IT CAN'T STOP ME MY BRAIN IS A SELF INDULGENT THIRST MACHINE AND IT IS GOING

Anyways thank you so much for sending me this ask. It took me two days to get to it because I needed to sit down and think through these. I can't wait to send this to some of my followers!

2 notes - Posted May 23, 2022

#3

I'm posting this at night because I want to share this and then bury it in reblogs because this scares me

3 notes - Posted September 18, 2022

#2

My birthday is on the 6th so i cant help but think that scara being released then is hoyos bday gift to me (i may or may not cry if i dont pull him)

6 notes - Posted December 4, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

I need to put diluc and dainsleif on either side of leon from dislyte because i swear to god its all i see

11 notes - Posted May 14, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[yeonjun4beagles]

best friend Yeonjun coming over and hearing his name in moans.

you can't deny it no more, not when you have a walking sex god, the definition of lust itself as your best friend. you slowly trace your hands down your body, feeling it tingles with pleasure, a sigh escaping past your lips. it's wrong, it feels so wrong that you're turned on just from the picture yeonjun posted minutes ago from twitter but fuck that guilt, it doesn't matter as of now, when he look oh-so-deliciously fuckable, his sweat drenched shirt sticking to his body and his long, slender fingers parting his hair.

clothes long forgotten, you're now laying on your bed, rubbing your little nub of pleasure, imagining all the things yeonjun would do to you. the way his long fingers would wrap around your throat, his other hand abusing your clit and driving you into pleasure, the way his sweet, plump lips would look so pretty wrapped around your nipples while fucking into you so fast, his name being the only thing you remember. "fuck, yeonjun, more...", you moaned as you ease a finger into your throbbing cunt, eager to be filled with obviously not your own fingers.

—————

yeonjun was on his way to your apartment, your favourite takeouts in his hand and duffel bag in his other, dying to meet with his best friend (as if it wasn't just yesterday that he crashed at your place). fishing for the spare keys that you gave him, he's wary of the silence of your usually-filled-with-music apartment. 'is y/n not home? but i thought she doesn't have any plans today?', he quietly enters your apartment, putting down his things on the table before making his way to your room. ‘i’m so gonna beat her ass if she’s still sleeping’.

what he didn’t expect when he opened your door was seeing you on your bed, not a single strand of clothing on you, your hands busy chasing your own pleasure while letting out such beautiful moans. it’s no secret that he sees you in a more-than-friends way, with you being his only girl best friend but seeing you like this, so pretty touching yourself makes him want to cross every boundaries he has ever set with you.

“god, yeonjun, you’re making me feel so good..”, colours drained from his face, afraid that you caught him but seeing that your eyes were still closed shut, he knew you crossed that boundaries long ago, lusting over him just as much as he does. making his way slowly to your bed, his eyes rakes over your body hungrily, barely holding in the urge to just fuck you then and there. “y/n, you could’ve just ask for my help if you’re that horny over me”, he said, tracing his fingers on your thigh, feeling the way your body tensed from his touch.

you completely froze, taking your fingers out of your pussy, dread taking over you as you stared at yeonjun. “y-yeonjun, w-what the fuck?” “no, baby, go on, keep touching yourself like that, you look so damn pretty moaning my name like that”, yeonjun said as his hands continues to caress your thigh, urging you to go on. you moaned at the nickname, feeling a new wave of pleasure washing over you. completely throwing out any sense of decency out the window, your fingers made its way back to your dripping core while staring into yeonjun’s lust filled eyes. “fuck y/n, can i kiss you?” “you can do whatever the hell you want with me yeonjun, god, just use me”, you said before yeonjun instantly crashes his lips with you, capturing you into a hungry, needy kiss. 

just the feeling of his lips on you was enough to get you going as you fasten your pace, moaning into his mouth while he willingly swallow each of your beautiful moans. yeonjun softly inches his hand between you legs and circles your clit, helping you reach your orgasm. “are you close, y/n? are you gonna cum fingering yourself thinking about me? god, you dirty, dirty girl”, yeonjun murmurs against your lips, making you whine at his vulgar words. “yes, yeonjun, im so close, please don’t stop, you’re doing so good”, you said, feeling your high approaching closer than you expected. after all, having the choi yeonjun himself staring at you, watching you masturbating to the thoughts of him is enough to send you over the edge.

“go on, baby, cum for me, i wanna hear you moan my name”, yeonjun said as he quicken his assault on your clit, urging you to come undone on his fingers. “fuck, yeonjun, im coming”, you releases as your back arches from the bed, coming so intense you were seeing white. taking your fingers out of your cunt, yeonjun brought them to his mouth, licking them clean while staring into your eyes hungrily.

“god, you taste so good, baby. can’t wait to have this sweet pussy wrapped around my cock”, yeonjun said as he make his way on top of you while discarding his clothes onto the floor.