#im sorry ashley you deserve the world

[theperplexednavigator]

Uh oh! What has our dear Ashley Parks discovered in the ominous storage facility deep in the woods where no one can hear her scream? We'll find out, after these messages!

[mrsmiseryxo]

Behind Closed Doors

homelander x assistant! reader

🎧 Behind Closed Doors- Lana Del Rey

Disclaimer: This is finally done after two months, i first started this when the season came out. I don't know anything about the corporate world. I made up things as I went along :3 im sorry :( Also my first time writing fanfic and first time creative writing in a while, so I am a bit rusty be nice please :3 I wrote this as a challenge to myself , so i hope its not too bad. Constructive criticism welcome :)

around 3-4k words i lost count

this is so secretary ( 2002) coded

Tags: dom!Homelander Fem! Girly! Reader. praise kink, body worship, p in v, fingering, cmnf, homelander is soft for reader. creampie, breeding kink, daddy nickname used. homelander and reader are horny weirdos. I'm bad at tagging hopefully i'll be better :(

Set between seasons 3-4 but i didn't watch gen v oops

You transcribe the meetings for Vought, and you feel like you don’t get the recognition that you deserve. That is until Homelander calls for a private meeting. 

You were quiet and meek, like a little mouse. He viewed you exactly like that. A rodent to be exterminated. Squashed. He’ll have a word with whoever was in charge of hiring you. Even more of a word if it was Ashley. In your eyes, he could never hide the utter disdain on his face whenever he got a waft of your sweet, vanilla rose scent as you . He thought you represented everything wrong with humans. Your head was always hung low, you always stared at your shoes as you brought Ashley the notes for this week’s meeting. How dare you not look in his eyes? How can someone as stupid as you ever be trusted with confidential information about the company?

He absolutely hated everything about you. Your prissy nature, the way you only drank matcha lattes with soy milk. He turned his nose at that poor excuse of a milk option. He smelled that bullshit from a mile away. He hated the gloss on your lips. He hated the sparkle in your eyes, like you still had a lot of life to look forward to. He hated that hopeful mentality you held, following the philosophy that life was going to get better. He simultaneously hated and loved the way you cowered in his presence, the way your hands get sweaty and clutch at your skirt. He loved and hated the fact that you couldn’t hold eye contact with him. On top of all that, Homelander hated the way you made his dick twitch.

Even as you stumble around with a slight hunchback, he couldn’t keep thoughts of peeling off your tights and bending you over the table where meetings were held. How breathless and cute your pathetic moans would be. How he would make you speak up and ask for what you truly want. He wondered what your lip gloss would taste like. How soft your plush ass would feel as he caresses it. Even considering your horrible posture, something as small as your scent is enough to turn him on.

When homelander would retire to his apartment, he would drink a pint of milk and jerk off. That was his nightly routine for the last couple of years. He would think about Madelyn Stillwell, Stormfront, and if he was feeling especially normal, he would think about Queen Maeve. After a week of you working at Vought, his jerk off material had changed. He began thinking about you. A lot. You had dominated his brain, and this irritated the hell out of Homelander. He had never given this much thought to another person before. Mundane and ordinary things had popped into his brain. What did you eat for breakfast? What side of the bed do you sleep on? As much as he tried thoughts of you out of his head, they always came back with a vengeance. Just your entire existence bugged Homelander, but he got used to seeing you in the conference room, even looked forward to the weekly meetings if it meant he got to see you. He’d notice that his presence would have an embarrassing effect on you. Of course, he would have a certain effect on just about everyone that he encountered, but he relished in the fact that you would get so flustered when in the same vicinity of each other. He would then think of ways to get you worked out, he wanted to tease you just enough to coax you. He’d knew the type of girl you were, you thrived under words of praise. Homelander also knew that you’d be obedient enough to never say anything. He’d make you fear him, more than you already do. He wanted to make the desire to please stronger.

After the first month of your newfound employment at Vought, you wondered why anyone would put up with Homelander and the Seven’s antics. You pride yourself on your obedience and dedication. Why could nobody acknowledge the sea of tears shed over copious hours of overtime, and the perfection you put into shooting out emails everyday, keeping people on track. You even schedule the time the emails are to be put out. You know deep down you will never say anything, or even hint at the maltreatment and neglect that you recieve. You want to remain hopeful that this is just a rough patch, and as you get more acclimated to the company you won’t feel this way, they won’t treat you this way.

You wake up at 5:30 to face the day. 30 minute shower, a five step skin routine, and light makeup routine. You were told to always look your best when first hired. Vought has an image to maintain, and their employees should reflect that ( which only really applies to female employees).

While in the shower, you contemplate your life. You’re proud of yourself and what you have accomplished so far, but sticking to the Vought job is insane. It’s insane because you have a crush on your boss. Arguably the most famous and powerful man in America, or even the entire world. You know he's not a good person, but you wouldn’t mind being at his beck and call. God, it was pathetic how you imagine him grunting in your ear for you to take it. You try to move past these thoughts for the betterment of your life.

You are the first to arrive to the meeting room. You set up your space, placing your laptop, a notebook with strawberry pattern on it, and your matcha latte with soymilk.

As the supes settle in, you get ready to write. This week’s meeting was about searching for another member of the seven, or to speak truthfully, find a new black noir. You are clueless to how The Seven found itself without a Black Noir, but you know it is in your best interest to never ask questions. Of course, like the queen of England, Homelander is the last to arrive. Homelander strides in greeting everyone.

“ Mmm can’t wait for the bullshit we talk about today,” He rolls his eyes. You notice his tone even more irritated today. Homelander walks over to the front of the table and sits. Everyone waits for him to speak, for him to start the meeting. As you write the date on the top of your paper, you hear him clear his throat.

As you look up, he says your name. How does he even know your name? He couldn’t give less of a shit at anyone at this table, especially you.

“Can I speak to you at the end of the meeting? Alone of course. We wouldn’t want any of these morons listening in”

“ Oh. Yeah, of course!” You stutter a bit. You give him a small smile. He gives you his signature fake smile back. You know that look all too well. You recognize that that look is basically the middle finger. That highly calculated smile hides the disgust he feels for everyone around him at any given time. All the while, you are caught off guard by his words. Being alone in a room with any man would make you anxious, but being the only woman in the room with Homelander makes you nauseous. To say you are absolutely mortified would be an understatement.

Everyone in the room gives you a side eye. Ashley looks like she might pull out a gun and shoot you. She knows she’ll never hear the end of it. After all, she did hire you.

The rest of the meeting goes as smoothly as it could. Some dumb remarks were made by The Deep, but it could have been worse. You didn’t pay much attention during this meeting, as you were in your head about what this private session with Homelander would entail. Homelander senses your heartrate going up. He can practically hear the blood rushing through your veins. His hand quietly goes to grab and rub his bulge. He thinks of you on your knees, him grabbing your hair as you rub your face against his crotch with your hands on his thighs, looking up at him with adoration in your eyes. He brings his hands up and bangs the table.

“ Ok, I think we’re all done here,’’ He gives instructions to the Deep and Ashley to scout for the new Black Noir while A-Train shoots his movie. You write the details of the meeting in your notebook.

Everyone gets out of their chair and leaves, Ashley gives you a death stare. You feel faint, and your legs try to gather courage to walk toward Homelander.

“ Shut the door behind you, will you buddy” Deep closes the door, and you two are left alone at last.

Homelander slowly strides toward you with his hands behind his back. Like a deer in headlights , you were paraylzed with fear, you could not move. He softly grabs your chin. He sees the fear in your eyes.

“ Hey, you’re not in trouble. I can see the hairs on your arm standing up. It’s fine. You’re not in trouble.” He reassures you, eliminating the worst case scenario your brain. You breath a breathe of relief. You look at Homelander’s boots, still afraid to look him in the eye.

He gives a slight chuckle. “ I’m not going to laser you, ya know. Um, actually I asked you to stay because I realized something.” He places his hands on your shoulders, you finally look up. He is towering over you. You can see the absence of his pores on his face. He truly is perfect, which makes his presence even more intoxicating. Your head feels dizzy from both the fear and his course fingertips on your shoulders.

“ You’ve been here for a good while. I know that you think that you’ve gone unnoticed. But trust that that could not be further from the case.” He sighed. “ To be quite honest with you sweetheart, you’ve been too much of a distraction around here. Your short little skirts are killing me.” Homelander laughs. He imagined his hands hiking up your skirt all of the time. He toys with your hair as you cannot believe that this is happening. His hands travel to your neck as you can smell the mintiness of his breath. He places soft sweet kisses on the tip of your ear as you let out a whimper.

“ I know you wanted me like this.  Ya think I don’t know why you try so hard? You want to get my attention. Think of this as a reward, yeah?” Your knees buck. The pit of desire in your stomach is getting bigger, and you're aching for more of his touch.

“ I need you to look at me” He says in his stern voice. “ And I need you to respond when I’m talking to you, kay? Sit on the table for me.”

You nod your head. A light tap of his hand kisses your left cheek.

“ Use your words, doll.” Homelander whispers and looks at you tentatively.

“oh okay” you stutter and stammer.

He impatiently unbuttons your shirt, practically tearing it open, and quickly undoing the claps of your pretty pink bra ( which you wore everyday, holding onto hope he would one day see it) clumsily breaking a clasp in the process.

“ I’ll get you a new one, its fine” Your mouth opens in a slight gasp.

His tender, soft, touch full of need finds the softness of your breasts, as he bends down to delicately pinch your nipples, hard, from the building's chill and the unfamiliar feel of his leather gloves. He bites his lips, resisting the urge to come right then and there. He lightly sets you on your back, legs dangling off the table. He looms over your view. The blonde man begins to suckle on your breast, massaging the other. His lips leave soft marks all over your tits as he rotates his hands and his lips.

“ Oh god, you feel so fucking good, sweetheart, your tits feel amazing” You let out a mewl as your pussy clenches. Filthy sounds of Homelander lapping at your tits and soft cries escaping your mouth fill the room. He lightly nibbles your nipple. In a fleeting moment of bravery, you give Homelander a request.

"Mmm want you inside"

“Not yet honey. Needa prep you first, know you can’t handle it right now. ” He unzips your skirt and throws it across the room. Your tights were thigh high, so he didn’t have to take them off like he would have liked. He looks almost animalistic as he crouches down to level with your cunt. He rubs his gloved hands up and down your bare thighs, as he inhaled the scent of your clothed pussy. You run your hands through his soft, blonde hair, thinking about how how heaven feels.

He murmurs into your pussy, “ you’re fucking soaked and i barely touched you”

His nose brushes with your clit. Catching wind of your squirming and quiet mumbles, Homelander purposely moves his nose in a circle while he maintains eye contact with you. A strong hold of his hands is on your hips, trying to contain the buildup of your pleasure. His rhythmic movement works your way toward an orgasm, and as you get higher and higher, almost reaching your peak, he moves away, toward your mouth, embracing your tongue, biting your lip softly, as your lips sloppily crashed into each other. He sat you back up as his arms moved up and down your back. Anger quickly left your body as quickly it came, you couldn’t be mad at his denial when you inhaled his fresh linen and sandalwood scent.

He breaks away from your lips .“I want you to cum on my cock, so im just gonna make you nice and wet for now, sound good?” You look into his of course that sounded good, but something felt off.

“ mmkay homelander” you mumble, feeling a bit odd and disconnected suddenly. You don’t want to call him that, his nose was in your pussy, his tongue all over your chest, it felt wrong to call him homelander. Sensing this, he does the unthinkable.

“ call me john” he mutters under his breath, almost inaudible. you grin at him.

“ mmkay john!” God. your squeal and positive attitude made his cock even harder, which he didn’t think possible. You relax a bit more, as this was a sign of him opening up.

He slowly wiggles you out of your panties, as you giggle. Leaving you fully naked, Homelander basks in the sight of you, ready and pliant for him. 

“ Yeah, what’s so funny” Homelander smiles at you. 

“ hmm. Dunno. You’re just so…” you trail off at the end of your sentence.

As you’re responding to his question, Homelander slips a finger inside you. You let out a cry, slightly rolling your head back.

“ Im so what sweetheart, finish your sentence” He grabs you by your neck, demanding a deep sloppy kiss, whilst adding another finger in your pussy, plunging deep in and out of your slick folds. He curls two fingers up,

‘So..mmph..good, feels good, john” 

“ Mmm yeah I know honey, I know ”  He coos, mockingly in between kisses. He worked his fingers until your breaths became ragged, squirming and quivering under his touch. 

“ You’re so fucking wet, baby” He grunts while you moan as John scissors his fingers in and out of your slick pussy. He moves his fingers, moving them into circles on your clit.

“Im gonna cum, please!” You plea for him to keep going, faster.

“ Ah ah ah, no i don’t think so. going do it on my dick remember?” He pulls his fingers out of your wet warmth, drags his tongue up and down his fingers.

He moans as he sucks on his own fingers, you look up at john with utter adoration.

“you taste so good mmph” Your tongues intertwine, lapping filthy at one another. He bits your earlobes while his hands lazily fidget with your nipples.

He then brings the bottom of his suit to his knees, cock swinging out. It’s egregiously thick. His length swollen and aching, leaking out precum from his pretty tip.

“ I’m going put my cock in now, ok sweetheart?” He seems to take it easy on you, as he doesn’t mention your mouth salivating at the sight of his dick.

“need it bad, been waiting for it”

“ Oh I know, i’ve seen the way you look at me” he laughs sinisterly.

He uses one of his arms to spread your thighs wider apart as his other hands supports you up, grasping the whole of your back. You smile up at him

He positions himself nearer to you, his cock at your entrance.

“ it’s gonna be a big stretch ok, need you to breath, if you need support, hold onto my shoulder.” he senses your lack of experience, or at least your naivety. you had never experienced anything like this, and you never would again, he would make sure of it.

you nod your head and look up. You’re already cock drunk, you trust him with your life. He reassures you with a kiss to your forehead.

Homelander bullies his length through your warm walls, gently and slowly. you let out a cry, both of pleasure and pain. you feel so good full, He groans into your mouth, as you moan into his.

“ ok honey, it’s going in”

“mmmphh John, so big..”

“does it hurt?” he stops in his tracks.

“a little, but not a lot” you say almost in a whisper.

“ok, ill keep going really slow, sweetheart”

He thrusts real slow, as he caresses your face. you lose feeling in your legs as he pounds softly into you. He finds him rhythm quickly as he maintains his pace. You hold onto his back as he moves his hands all over you.

“ God, your tight pussy clenching my cock feels so good sweet girl”

You smile and giggle.

“ My dick needs to be in your sweet cunt forever, sweet cunt, sweet girl” He growls into your ear.

“mm Keep going daddy!” you squeal, not knowing the damage you have done but uttering those words. Homelander feels like could come right then and there. A primal switch flipped in his brain.

Tears begin to swell in your eyes. “ I’m so so so sorry i didn’t mean to say that” Homelander sees your eyebrows furrow and your eyes widen.

His thrusts begin to pick up the pace, the perfect rhythm becomes sloppy, as your juices spill out of your thigh. His fat cock ever so slightly touches your cervix as you let out a soft sob.

“you don’t know what you do to me don’t you? Jesus, this pussy was molded for my cock” He grabs you by your knees and throws your legs over his shoulders. His dick twitches inside of you, signaling he’s about to cum, and you’re about to follow him.

“Say it again. Call me what you just called me” He annunciatesin a low voice.

“ Fuck, daddy feels good, want your cum” You feel free of all embarrassment and shame in that moment as you bask in euphoria.

“ That’s a good girl. Good girls get to cum. Good girls get filled up with daddy’s cum” Homelander never knew that this nickname did it for him. Hell, he was more of a mommy kind of guy, but he would do anything for you. Any word that came out of your mouth would make him hard, because it was you. But submitting yourself to him in this way, it did more than getting his dick up. He was disgusted by this feeling. What was it? Why did it feel so weird?

“ Oh god I’m gonna cum, gonna cum in you, give you babies oh god” He sloppily kisses your face, as fat blobs of sticky cum drip out of your cunt. He keeps his cock in your pussy, as he holds you with your face pressed to his chest.

“i need to come daddy” you stutter and shake under him.

He allows you to come and you swear you see stars. John smears his cum across your pussy, then he bends down to kiss in between your lips highs.

He helps you into your skirt and what’s left of the rest of your clothes. You smile at him, and he smiles back. A genuine smile.

that got a little more emotional then i thought it was? idk should i make more of homelander x reader in mind? if you want to give feedback feel free to :) i’m doing this to be a better writer !

divider creds: @cafekitsune @bunnysrph @anitalenia

[elliebean714]

Hi! I was wondering if you could do a Chris x Male reader (Cause he fr is a Bi king and deserves all the love in the world) Where it takes place during the game, and the reader wasn't apart of the joke but Josh believes he was and tries to put him in the traps (I think thats a good for it) and when Chris finds out it was Josh he gets really upset. You can kinda decide the rest of it. If you don't want to do this request thats totally okay, I completely understand.

(Also can i be the 🍄 Anon? Again it's totally okay to not refuse) Love you and have a nice day!

GREETINGS 🍄ANON!! OF COURSE YOU CAN! I LOVE YOU TOO💗💕 So, Chris x reader in this is a pre-established relationship, I didn't want to do the 'will they, won't they' he had with Ashley in the game cus I wanted to write him already in a relationship with youuuuuuu💘 I'm very glad that 'Chris is Bi' is canon in our collective minds, this page believes in Bi Chris supremacy 🙇🙇‍♀️🙇‍♂️ This is so goddamn long i'm sorry lol tryin something new that's all. I really like this btw pls request more,🍄 anon. ily. BTW IM SO SORRY YOUVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS SINCE AUGUST PLEASE IM SO SORRY. Tiny Tw for gore and panic attacks, honestly if you're fine with the game you should be alright it's not too bad just thought I'd mention it in case yk?

Guilty Until Proven Innocent

Chris Hartley x M!Reader

Fluff, Angst, Comfort, kinda slow-burn (plot wise)

During-Game

Prologue

Chris and Josh layed passed out on the kitchen counters, Beth did the dishes, you cleaned the kitchen. You heard hushed laughter through the double doors that led to the main room, they were surely doing some late night pranks on each other, you rolled your eyes and continued cleaning.

"Did you see that?" Beth asked, searching for something outside.

"What?" You tore your eyes from the surface you were cleaning to watch her.

"Dad said it'd just be us this weekend." She mumbled.

"What's up Beth?"

"I think someone's out there."

You went over to the windows to see if you could find what she saw and she began trying to wake Josh.

"I can't see anything. Where did you see whatever you saw?" You asked but got no response, you turned to see her reading a note.

"I think something's happening to Hannah." She sighed, "Woah, what the fuck?"

Her eyes were on the window, you turned around and saw something running past. You both ran out of the kitchen to see everyone else running to the wide open main doors to the outside.

You quickly found out they had pranked Hannah, humiliating her, causing her to run away in embarrassment. Beth ran off after her alone, you and Sam got everyone inside. You thought the twins would be back soon, you left the door unlocked so they'd be able to get in once they did.

Chapter One

You and Chris sat beside each other on the bus, sharing earbuds, listening to the unsettling video Josh filmed and sent you. He looked out the window, staring at the breathtaking mountain and the snow falling onto the ground outside. You gently laid your head on his heavily layered shoulder. Once the video ended you put the regular music back on.

"I love you." Chris smiled.

You pulled him into a sweet kiss. "Love you too babe."

"He loves me!" Chris exclaimed, throwing his arms in the air with a big goofy smile on his face.

"Always." You rolled your eyes playfully, big smile on your face too.

"Okay, so... when we get to the lodge... what do ya wanna do?" Chris asks.

"Uhh, I dunno, it honestly feels a little weird to be going back you know?" You answer, an uneasy feeling in your gut.

"Yeah, I know. But, trust me, Josh is super siked to have everyone back this weekend. I really think this'll help." He comforts you, gently picking up your hand, giving it a loving squeeze.

"Okay, I trust you." You relent. Still feeling uneasy but pushing that feeling deep down as to not let it ruin your weekend away.

~~

"Cable car's gonna be a while hun. We should look around." Chris says, placing his bag on the bench and leading you around the back of the Cable car station.

"Hey, didn't you say Sam would be here?" You ask him, looking at the wanted poster on the side of the building

"Huh? Oh yeah, she said she'd go earlier, she went up with Jess I think." He replies, distracted by the gun he's holding.

"Where did you find that?" You jumped in surprise, staring at the gun too.

"Oh, there's a shooting range over here." He answered nonchalantly.

He walked over to it, you followed. Once you were beside him, he began shooting the makeshift targets, looking proud of himself and his aim.

"See that babe? I could protect you from all kinds of dangerous things, no sweat." Chris boasts, his big silly smile lighting his face in an ethereal manner. You pull him into your embrace and kiss him sweetly.

"Have I told you how much I love you?" You whispered, staring deeply into his love filled gaze.

"Probably but I'm not gonna tell you to stop." He smiles fondly.

"Good." You say before kissing him again

Chapter Two

You and Chris reached the lodge together, there you found everyone in the group besides Mike, Jess and Emily, the latter were probably busy fighting out in the snow whilst Mike watched so you ignored that and went to sit on the steps beside Ashley whilst Chris spoke with Josh.

You could hear them both laughing and chatting lightheartedly, the sound made you happy. Last time you'd seen Josh he was an emotional wreck, unable to talk through his sobs, seeing him so positive now helped further suppress that uneasy feeling within you. The boys stepped up the stairs towards the main door only to find the lock frozen.

"We're gonna go find another way in." Chris informs you.

You stand to kiss his cheek "I wish you luck, brave traveller." You put on a silly accent.

"Your affection, Good Sir, is all the luck I need." He kisses your hand.

~~

Everyone entered the lodge, chattering idly before Josh lent down to get a fire started, not long after, Mike and Jess enter, with Emily on their heels. As usual, a fight started almost immediately between the two girls, Josh interrupted once he got too frustrated with their petty argument. He instructed Mike and Jess to visit the cabin in the woods, Emily instructed Matt to help her find some bag she lost on the hike upto the lodge, Sam left to take a bath and Ashley to put her things in her room, leaving you and Chris alone with Josh.

You made your way towards Chris, taking off your coat and hanging it beside Chris'.

"Aww look, our coats are in love too!" Chris comments cheesily.

"Romantic." You smile at him.

"You lovebirds almost done?" Josh interrupts.

You and Chris roll your eyes at him and walk over to the frozen stiff sofas, sitting next to each other for warmth.

"So, Josh, you said no ones been up here?" You asked.

"Yup, not in a whole year. Why?" He answered.

"I'm sure you know about it but down at the base of the cable car I saw a wanted poster for somebody. Do you know if that's anything we should be worried about this weekend?" You inquired, with a lighthearted tone to cover the nerves.

"What? No I had no idea. I'm sure it's fine though, don't worry about it." He stated before turning back to the fire.

~~

Josh sent you and Chris down into the basement to look for the spirit board whilst he helped Sam with the boiler.

You both searched the old cardboard boxes for the spirit board Josh mentioned. It seems you were taking the search more seriously however.

"Woah Y/N check this out!" Chris called out from behind a shelf.

You followed his voice to where he was standing, rummaging through a cardboard box with 'costumes' written on the side in black sharpie.

"What's up?" You ask.

"Babe! Look at all this cool old junk!" He takes out a creepy mask and brings it upto his face.

"Still hot." You remarked causing him to smile beneath the mask.

"I kn-" Chris is cutoff by the sound of Sam and Josh entering the basement, chatting idly.

He quietly puts on a robe, also found in the box, and the mask. You stifle a laugh and find a costume of your own to put on, Chris leaves to continue searching for the spirit board. Once you're fully dressed, Chris has already found it and hidden it in his robe. You both begin shaking boxes as a distraction, you hear Sam and Josh discuss the noises then begin to follow them.

You snuck ahead, so that when Chris jumped out and began chasing them, you'd have a head start. Sam continues forward, slowly. Chris jumps out at Sam, making a big noise and running after her, she throws down a mat in hopes of slowing him down. That's when you join in, chasing after the duo, making Sam scream louder. Once they reach the door Sam begins banging on it, swiftly finding it locked.

A few moments of panic pass then Chris murmurs "Hey."

"What?" Sam struggles to catch her breath.

"Hey." Chris continues.

"What the hell?" Sam finishes.

You both remove your masks, laughing. "Boom. You just got punked."

Chris and Josh share a high five as Sam finally catches her breath. Josh unlocks the basement door after a bit, Chris, Josh and you start teasing Sam. Once you reach the top of the stairs you see that Ashley is waiting by the fireplace.

Chris makes some cute dumb joke, Sam leaves to finally bathe, then you go with Chris to help him set up the spirit board.

Chapter Three

Josh lights the last few candles, you sit next to Chris, giving him a sweet kiss on his cheek as Ashley sits herself in front of the board.

Chris let's Ashley ask the spirit questions. At first they are simple, silly questions, but they quickly turn serious as the spirit reveals themselves to be one of Josh's deceased sisters. Chris struggles to keep an upbeat mood, Ashley begins to panic further and Josh's face sunk, you can see regret and guilt fill his eyes.

The pointer starts moving erratically across the board, spelling 'proof' and 'library' then suddenly, the table jumps up and the spirit board and pointer fly across the room. Josh freaks out and leaves the room, Ashley scolds you and Chris, thinking you were playing another prank then leaves to find Josh.

"So, I guess we should go find that proof in the library, right?" You ask cautiously. Chris nods solemnly and leads you down to the library. Once you reach it you both look around for a few moments before a series of books are tossed from there place on the bookshelf, a button is found in their place.

"Should I push it?" You ask nervously.

"That's what buttons are for I guess..." Chris responded, a shaky tone to his typically jokey demeanour.

The bookshelf opened, revealing a hidden room, Chris entered before you got the chance to offer. Whilst you're sure it's more eagerness and curiosity, your heart flutters at the idea that he didn't want to risk you getting hurt.

"Woah Y/N, come look at this." He says, a quiet terror to his voice.

You enter the room and take the picture he's holding, examining it. Its nothing special, just a cute photo of the twins, you look at the other side.

I WILL TAKE THEM AND BLEED

THEM LIKE PIGS AND RIP THEIR

SOFT WHITE SKIN OFF! FUCKING

16 YEARS. 16 YEARS I WAITED

FOR PRETTY LITTLE

HANNAH AND BETH

...

Jesus...

Jesus fucking christ...

You feel vomit clawing it's way up your throat.

This note...

Is the most vile thing you've ever read in your life.

And...

It looks like,

it's written,

in blood.

"Hey, hey, babe..." Chris' ever soothing voice cuts through the white noise in your head.

"I feel sick." You whisper. Chris takes the photograph from you and places it back on the desk he found it on.

"I know, it's horrible." He gently holds you, running his comforting fingers through your hair.

You stay in his arms for what feels like forever. Eventually you calm down and pull away. "So uh," Your voice is cracking still, "we should show Josh that picture right?"

"Yeah, when you're ready though. I don't want to push you." He caresses your cheek.

You breathe out slowly, "I'm okay. Let's go."

The pair of you leave the tiny room, he holds your hand, and walk through a long hallway. Eventually you reach set of double doors, you open the door first only to be grabbed by someone in a weird mask and knocked out.

Chris bangs on the door after you, when it opens for him, he spots you unconscious on the floor, Ashley laying beside you, then the person in the mask knocks him unconscious.

Chapter Four

You slowly awaken, in a cold dark room, feeling your arm muscles ache. They're held above your head, hanging from a hook attached to a wooden wall. You hear soft breathing beside you and turn your head towards the sound.

Somebody hangs there, in the same position as you, you call out to them, trying to wake them. When they don't respond you try to kick them softly but they're too far away and your legs can't stretch far enough to reach them.

A few more minutes of trying to wake them pass when you hear Chris and Ashley's voices getting louder and louder, shouting your name. Eventually they enter the shed you're in.

"Chris? Ashley? We're in here!" You called out as loud as you could.

"Y/N? Baby boy I'm coming, don't worry sweetheart!" Chris exclaims, following your voice towards a large window and locked door.

The lights turn on, you see Chris and Ashley through the window and finally recognise the figure beside you to be Josh.

A weird creepy voice starts talking, Josh finally wakes up.

The voice explains that Chris will have to choose between you or Josh. The other will be sawn in half.

Josh and Ashley cry out in terror, you and Chris in desperation. The saw starts spinning. Ashley runs away from the window, not wanting to witness the bloodshed of two of her dear friends.

"I, I won't let you die Y/N, I promise baby, I promise." Chris cries, pained to betray his best friend.

He does just that. Pulling the lever in front of him causes the saw to travel towards Josh.

Closer.

Closer.

Closer.

The most gut-wrenching cry possible, coming from Josh and Chris, you feel your own tears spilling, and Josh's red, hot, metallic blood splashing onto you.

What feels like hours pass but is really just a few seconds. The screaming creases but the blade keeps spinning. The door unlocks and whips open, Chris runs to you and unties your wrists.

When you fall he holds you, when you find yourself unable to move he carries you out, when you need him he's there, always.

The chill of the winter air freezes your tears, and Josh's blood. Chris hugs you tighter as he sobs.

"They're over here." Ashley calls to someone. Matt and Emily come into view along side her.

"Jesus, is what Ash said true? Some killer is on the mountain.?" Matt asks, stunned by your appearance. All you can do is weap louder and nod slowly, which is more than Chris, who continues to hold onto you and sob.

Their words turn to white noise. The only thing you can hear is the sound of Josh's scream and his blood spluttering everywhere.

Chapter Six

You and Chris returned to the lodge to search for Sam whilst the others returned to the cable car. Chris looked around the upstairs rooms and you checked the bathroom only for everything to turn out empty.

"Hey, Chris?" You stop suddenly, "I can't imagine how bad that was, having to choose between us, but... I appreciate it babe. I really love you Chris."

"I love you too." He sighs, "Let's find Sam, yeah?"

You nod, following him downstairs into the theatre.

"Y/N, you alright?" He stops to check up on you.

"I'm a bit better. But not much." You smile solemnly, he takes your face into his hands as he kisses your nose.

"I know babe, we're gonna get the hell of this mountain and never look back I promise." Chris pauses, studying your face, he looks at you like he's just fallen in love all over again.

"We just need to find Sam then we can go?" You finish his sentence after a couple of seconds.

"Find Sam then we can go."

~~

You found yourselves in the cellar after a series of creepy noises and doors slaming. Once you calm yourselves you start looking around, finding a pink dollhouse with a weird lock on it. You think nothing of it and continue forward down the short hallway when suddenly a painting flies of the wall.

You let out a short yelp in surprise "Woah!"

"How does a painting fall of the wall like that?" Chris whispers to himself, bewildered.

You approached the spot on the wall where the painting once hung, to find a key in its place. You take it to the dollhouse and unlock it. Inside reveals seven dolls upstairs and four dolls downstairs.

The dolls upstairs are posed very deliberately, six dolls have their backs towards you whilst one faces you, without eyes. Looking closer you realise each of the dolls represent one of your group. And they are posed like your friends were in the video they filmed. The one that costed Hannah her life.

Downstairs, two dolls are sitting on the couch whilst only one was in the kitchen. A blond on the stairs. And one upstairs looks like you.

"What the hell?" You whisper.

"I know, this is real creepy." Chris answers.

"Yeah but look, that one," You point to the blond on the stairs, "is Sam. And this one," You point to the doll that looks like you, "is supposed to be me? But I was downstairs with Beth cleaning."

When you say that, the lights suddenly come to life, flickering, and things begin getting thrown off shelves. You and Chris jump in fright and, just as suddenly as they started, everything stopped.

"I'm getting sick of this now!" Chris cried, exasperated. "That's weird, let's just keep going. I want to get out of here fast as possible."

~~

After a pair effort of pushing the heavy metal door to the freezer, you both manage to get in, unfortunately it's a one way door meaning you will have to find a different way back.

Shivering, you groan "Uggh! Why they'd want to make it colder?" Regretting taking off your coat earlier.

"I don't know. Keep moving, that should heat you up a bit." He answers wrapping an arm around you to share his body heat, or maybe he just wants to be near you. "You know I'd offer my jacket if I had it." He smiles as you continue on as one.

"Aww, and they say chivalry is dead." You kiss his cheek, "I appreciate your hypothetical sacrifice."

You turn a corner and find something hanging from a meat hook. A creepy mask, and wearing what looked exactly like Sam's clothes.

"Oh my god is she..." you begin, horrified by the potential answer you'd receive.

Chris reached out to touch it, quickly discovering that is was only a creepy decoy of some kind.

After finding that, you both moved with haste. Time was potentially of the essence, Sam was definitely in danger and you could save her if you hurried, unless she was already dead, of course.

In the next room you found a chair in the middle. With some strands of blond hair poking out from behind it.

"Oh my god, Sam?" You called out, releasing yourself from Chris' arm and running towards the chair, swivelling it towards you. Sam sits in it, in only a towel, unconscious but breathing. "She's okay!" You call out to Chris, "Hey come help me ca-"

Chris' muffled screams interupt you, you turn to face him only to see the creeper in the mask from earlier has drugged him, now he lies knocked out on the floor. Then the freak tried to drug you.

Thinking quick you punch them square in the jaw, so hard they take several steps back, you have to force yourself not to apologise profusely, and to try to escape, but of course they have you cornered, and drug you before you get the chance to fully register everything that's happened. And your plunged into darkness yet again.

Chapter Seven

You awake in an extremely dark room, once again. This time chackled to a chair opposite, who you assume is, Chris, whom finds himself in the same position as you, except with one hand unchackled. In the darkness, you can barely make out a gun that lies on the table between you two.

"Chris?" You call out trying to wake him, after a few more tries he eventually comes to. When he does, the lights come on and, as dim as they are, they do help considerably.

Then you hear mechanical revving from above the both of you, looking up you see two more saws, identical to the one that killed Josh. And the voice comes back.

Chris uses his free hand to grab the gun and shoot the saws but to no avail. Then the voice explains the situation this time. Chris has to choose whether to kill himself, or you. If he refuses, you'll both die.

"Oh fuck." You whispered, letting tears fall.

"I love you. Please remember that honey, remember I love you. With everything in me." Chris smiles sadly.

"No. Chris no don't you fucking think about it. Don't you dare!" You cry as he lifts the gun to his neck.

"He said it's my choice right? Just close your eyes baby. It'll be okay. I promise it'll be okay." You shut your eyes tighter than you have ever in your life at his command.

"Please. Please just let it be me. Don't make me live in a world without you. Please Chris." You sob. Your pleas are met with one final 'I love you' then you hear the shot.

~~

The next few minutes are haunting. You can't hear anything, you don't feel anything. And you don't dare open your eyes. All of a sudden you hear a few more shots being fired and that killers evil, distorted voice taunting 'Chris'. Who is Chris? Your boyfriend? Didn't he die? What's happening?

Then you hear Sam and Mike's voices? What are they doing here? Now Sam is... beside you? Loosening whatever is binding your wrists? Now she's calling your name and placing an arm around you like she's trying to comfort you.

An argument ensues with the voices around you, Mike, Sam and, Josh? And Chris? What the hell is going on?

Mike yells something then you hear what you think is a punch and something large falling to the ground. Following after, Sam and Mike converse on the other side of the room, and Chris moves to hold you.

"Hey, hey babe, you can open your eyes. It's okay I'm here. I'm okay." Chris kisses your head softly, holding you tight. You take a few shaky breaths to calm yourself before opening your eyes.

And he's okay, he's still there. Chris didn't die.

The relief that floods you at the conformation brings more tears. You don't ask questions about what happened or why you heard Josh's voice when you felt him die beside you, you just cry into your beloveds chest because, as shitty as tonight has been, he's okay, he's still here, he didn't die.

~~

You, Chris and Mike took Josh out to the shed to tie him up until morning. Josh was rambling on about nonsense which was aggravating Mike, you and Chris trailed behind.

"Hey, I love you." You smiled, rubbing his cheek softly, "I didn't say that earlier. I was a bit stressed."

In response Chris just hugs you.

"Aww look, my best friend and the prick that almost broke my jaw!" Josh interupts angrily.

"You deserved it." Mike mumbles under his breath.

"I was scared. I had found Sam passed out half naked. You just drugged my boyfriend. Of course I was gonna punch you." You defend yourself, causing Josh to start rambling again.

Chris and Mike scold him for his disturbed actions throughout the night whilst you hang back, only occasionally joining in, one thing that still didn't make sense.

Why was the doll made to look like you sitting upstairs?

Once the group reached the shed, you remembered what grotesque horrors occurred here. Only for them to have been a facade.

In anger, Mike forced Josh to the ground and began doing, something, that was making Josh writhe in pain. Although typically you or Chris would've stepped in to make him stop, neither of you did. Your own anger halting you, plus Josh killed Jess according to Mike so you both felt he deserved some vengeance.

Honestly when Chris told you what Mike said Josh did, even though you'd been through a night of Hell at his hands, you still couldn't believe he'd actually done that to someone. No matter his reasons.

Josh denied the accusations, although none of you took him seriously, he was clearly not lucid. Even as the three of you berated him for everything he'd done, for his disturbed plan, he still defended it like it was something to be proud of.

Finally having enough, Mike grabbed him and pulled him towards a stool sat in front of a pillar but as Mike tried to tie him to it, Josh started thrashing around and eventually it took all three of you holding him down to finally tie Josh up.

Once you did Josh started rambling on again, but no-one was paying attention to him. Mike inquired on whether Chris had ever seen Josh act like this before but he hadn't.

When Josh was done with his rant he laughed creepily and started insulting you, still laughing after each sentence. Angry as you were, you didn't feel the need to defend yourself. He just looked so pathetic, you could've just threatened to punch him again and he would've shut up, but Chris really didn't take lightly to insults thrown at you.

He started to argue with Josh, who was clearly getting a kick out of tormenting the two of you, "I just can't believe you choose your pretty little boy toy over your best friend you dick! Ever heard of loyalty? That guy helped kill my sisters! But what? He's got you so cock drunk you can't think logically?! You tried to kill me for that dic-"

Chris hit a plank of wood over Josh's head so hard he was knocked unconscious.

After a momentary freak out, Mike tells you to take Chris back to the lodge before he 'beats Josh to death'. You do so but once you're out of eye shot you kiss him roughly.

"You're hot when you're angry." You whisper into the next kiss.

"You have terrible timing." He quipped making you chuckle.

The walk back was silent, your mind kept wandering back to what Josh had said, 'That guy helped kill my sisters'...

But you were in the kitchen all night. The dolls did show you upstairs, but you were in the kitchen all night. When you said that whilst inspecting the dolls, the lights flickered and shelves shook violently, like you were lying, but it wasn't a lie, you were in the kitchen all night.

Chapter Eight

"Ahhh!" A bloodcurdling scream pierces the uncomfortable silence over the three of you.

"What the hell?" Sam asked uneasily.

A few seconds later someone started banging on the door and screaming to be let in, Emily.

Chris ran to the door and opened it for her, she fell to the floor shuffling away from the door, then she screamed for him to shut it. You and Sam helped her to her feet and walked her to the couch, all the while trying to calm her and get answers.

Apparently Matt and Ashley abandoned her whilst she was hanging off the side of the fire tower, she fell into the mines, found some horrible shit, and was chased by something.

Eventually Mike came running in, immediately hugging Emily when he saw her. Then came another knock at the door.

After a quick discussion Mike and Chris walked stealthily towards the door. When you tried to join them, Chris told you to hang back to protect the girls if anything happened. But you heard the slight quiver in his voice. A few moments of hushed tension between the two pass before the bang of the door slamming open, followed shortly by loud thumping boots on the hard wood floor.

When the boys came back around the corner, they had a creepy old guy, with a few large weapons and three huge gas tanks on his back, quick on their heels, who then began to scold you all for returning to the mountain. Then after Mike mentioned the Washingtons owning the mountain, he stated that the mountain belongs to the 'Wendigo'.

Murmurs of confusion spark between your friends before the old guy continued on briefly before once again, being interrupted by the ever-argumentative Mike, who himself was shut down by Sam.

The old guy told everyone that there is a curse living in the mountains, that if anyone resorted to cannibalism on it, "the spirit of the Wendigo shall be unleashed.". Whilst everyone stared at him in disbelief or disgust he continued, not giving anyone time to question him, about needing somewhere safe to stay for the rest of the night, Sam offered the basement and the guy told you all to go down there.

"Guys... I ran off and left Josh when I heard screaming." Mike's voice was laced with regret.

"Where did you leave him?" The guy asked.

"In the shed." Mike answered.

"Oh, then your friend will already be dead." He responded ominously, matter of factly.

After hearing this, Chris' face contorts into something solemn yet unreadable. You could see the conflict in his eyes, you took his idle hand and interlinked your cold fingers with his colder ones, bringing his attention back to you. With glimmering eyes he looked into yours.

"I have to go after him." He said louder than he intended.

"What? No! No way, the guy just said he's dead!" You scolded through your teeth.

"I'm sorry babe, I have to go. If there's a tiny chance he's okay I have to try." He reasons with you.

"Please Chris, please don't. He just told us how dangerous being outside is! Please I don't want to you to risk yourself. Please baby." You plead but just as before he ignores your wishes in favour of his selflessness. You'd be angry if it were anyone but Chris, perfect, protective, selfless Chris. How could anyone angry at him?

"I'm supposed to be his best friend and I let him down." He sighed.

You lowered your head in resignation, nodding dejectedly. "Fine, just come back.".

"I plan on it, don't worry." He smiles, with a comforting lack of fear.

"Then I'll come with ye." The guy joins in.

"I don't need your h-" Chris begins

"Shut up and take him." You interrupt, "We'll wait for you downstairs. " You finish.

Everyone began towards the basement, Chris was pulled aside and spoken too by the guy. After their conversation was concluded, they walked briefly towards a side door. You followed behind, wanting to give Chris a quick kiss for luck, stopping to watch as the 'flamethrower guy', as Sam had dubbed him, handed Chris a shotgun. After another short conversation between the two, you found the perfect place to jump in.

"Hey." You called out.

"Hey." He smiled.

"Come back in one piece, okay?" You kissed him swiftly.

"I'll do my best." He assured you, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear.

"I trust your best." You sighed as he walked out into the unpredictable snowscape.

~~

The unsteady, suffocating silence filled with tension wore heavily in the air, making it hard to breathe. He'd be okay, he promised, you kept repeating his previous reassurances in your head, every second of agonising quiet you became more fidgety.

A series of distant gunshots stirred further unease within you, curiosity guiding you towards a glass door. More gunshots, getting closer with each one. Eventually you see Chris come, just barely, into view. Aiming the gun at something out of view and sprinting, best he can with a seemingly injured leg, towards the door your standing at.

As soon as he was at the door you threw it open allowing him to re-enter the lodge quickly, once he was in you slamed the door back shut. He hurried you away from the door and down into the basement, limping as fast as he can behind you.

Once you both reach where everyone is waiting for you both they start bombarding Chris with questions. When Sam asks about the flamethrower guy, Chris shudders as he recounts that he was killed brutally by the Wendigo.

Mike started looking for another way out but Sam argued that they should stay put, Emily agreed, mentioning that the key to the cable car was missing when she visited with Matt and Ashley. Mike thought Josh might have it on him and Emily told him the Wendigo may have taken him into the mines, with that Mike decided he'd go down to try and find him.

Then the trio start investigating the flamethrower guys belongings, discussing what they're seeing and what they've seen throughout the night.

You and Chris remained silent, off to the side. Chris held himself tightly and rocked back and forth gently. To comfort him the best you could you put one cautious hand on his back. When he didn't fight, you slowly pulled his shaking form into you. Running a gentle hand through his hair, you calmed him slightly.

"It bit you? What bit you?" Mike's questions interrupted your moment.

"The Wendigo." Emily answered, voice shaky, then she started trying to make excuses as to why it was alright but Mike was denying the possibility.

"Emily, if the Wendigo bit you, you could turn into one of those things." Mike reasons.

"Oh that's ridiculous." Sam tried to defuse Mike's argument.

"He said it was from eating each other, if it bit you..." He trailed off, trying to find the courage to finish his sentence, "You can't be down here with us." Despite protests from you, Sam and Emily, he remained steadfast in his assumption. "You gotta go.".

You thought you should involve yourself, the idea of letting a friend get left to potentially die whilst you stayed safe downstairs made you sick to your stomach, Mike could be right. There was so much you didn't know about these 'wendigo' that you couldn't really discredit Mike's concerns, because to be fair, you shared them.

How could anyone be sure this was safe? That Emily wouldn't turn and kill everyone in the room? At the same time, who in their right mind would send someone to their death based on an assumption. Whilst thinking about whether you should join in or not, your rushed to reality when Mike pulls out his revolver and points it at Emily, who screams in, rightful, terror.

"This is the safe room, Em!" Mike cries through clenched teeth and streaming tears. Everyone stares at the scene with bated breath, begging someone else will stop him, because they're not going to.

~~

Mike left. A few minutes later Sam read the flamethrower guys notebook and found out the bites weren't contagious, and some other things that prompted her to go after Mike, she wanted everyone to go with her, but worried for Chris' injury, you decided to stay behind with him so Sam left with Emily.

"How's the leg?" You asked, hating the silence, but you only got an indifferent sniffle in response. He's trying his best to stay strong, soon you find yourself wrapping him up in your loving embrace.

"His fuckin head came off..." Chris whispered, voice cracking making your heart hurt more than it was.

"I know, I'm so sorry Chris." You soothed him to the best of your ability, he tucked his head into you.

"I just, want to go home." Chris sighed sadly.

"I know baby, I know we're almost done. Just have to wait for dawn to break, then we'll get home. Kay?" You kissed his head and prayed that time would pass faster.

Chapter Ten

Emily returned to the basement alone, saying Sam climbed a cliff on her own to find Mike. She took comfort in her own corner, barely looking at you or Chris once she'd finished explaining what happened. You guessed she was still deeply upset neither of you stepped in to defend her, although in Chris' state, his abstinence was far more explainable. Your silence was a betrayal.

Almost an hour passes, a thick, hefty cloud of quiet suffocates the three of you, one in anger, one in shock, one in horror.

Faint animalistic screeches from afar and all heads whip in their direction. "Fuck..." Emily whispers, Chris whimpers into you and that's all the conformation you need. They're here.

~~

"Run!" Chris shouts when Sam opens the door.

"Go go go go go!" Emily repeats, not before shoving you aside to rush ahead of you.

"Run!" Mike orders Sam after you run past him.

"Oh shit!" Sam screams as she rushes to slam the door shut then follows everyone to the top of the stairs.

"Don't move..." Mike whispers to Sam when the Wendigo arrive.

"Don't fucking move a muscle..." He completes when, clearly, the strongest one locks its eyes on Sam.

Then two more come up the stairs, they clearly anger the main one. Causing a fight to break out between two Wendigo. One gets tossed around and ends up breaking the gas pipe in the fireplace, giving Mike an idea. The first wendigo is killed.

You're unsure of the plan Mike and Sam come up with, telepathically, everybody just knows to slowly make your way towards the open door. The second wendigo is killed.

Once Mike has made it to a light bulb, he takes advantage of the Wendigo being distracted by Sam to crush the glass in his hands. As your inching towards the door, you hear it open and know Chris escaped.

And he's okay, he's out there. Chris didn't die.

"Hey!" Sam calls out when the Wendigo starts to investigate Mike a little too closely, but you're distracted with all the relief in the universe.

Then you hear one more pair of footsteps slowly retreating then turn to sprinting out the door and you know you're next.

The wendigo decides to stare in the direction of the door, however, momentarily trapping you inside and you thank every star in the sky when Sam hides behind a pillar, her squeaky sneakers being a good enough distraction for you to make your exit.

You crash into Chris' arms as you exit the cursed building. Heart pulsing in your ears, he cradles your head into his chest.

"Fuck." Chris whispers with tremble in his voice "It's done, babe, Y/N? It's over we made it! We survived!"

The cry that escapes your throat is full of relief and pain, it's wild and free whilst tied by knowledge that you could never be the same person you were. How could a person recover from this?

Before you know it the lodge has become an inferno and Mike has been thrown out. Everyone stares.

Jess

Time of death 00:12

Josh

Time of death 06:23

Matt

Time of death 06:31

Sam

Time of death 06:52

Epilogue

So much is happening, your head is killing, people died, no one believes any of you when you blame the Wendigo, everyone has sleeping problems now.

When things get bad, you can't breathe, can't think, can't stop crying, you run through it again, a simple statement that kept you sane the whole night.

He's okay, he's still there. Chris didn't die.

You call him he's probably having as bad a time as you, but he helps you through it, and when he needs you, you're right there.

It feels nice, to have someone to talk to, who'll understand you.

You know you're not crazy, and so does he, you hold him, he smiles for you.

That's why the answer is so easy, when, years later, once scars have healed, bruses faded, he asks you to marry him.

Because only a crazy man would refuse.

What I Write~

Games

TWD

~Elliebean714

♤♡◇♧☆♧◇♡♤♡◇♧☆♧◇♡♤♡◇♧☆

[mayonnaise06]

Since I have no followers on Tumblr, here's a piece of writing I did for fun recently.

I haven't spell or grammar checked it that well so it'll probably be full of mistakes.

Shattered hearts.

Everything is cold. Colder than ice, colder than Antarctica, colder than space. Not really, that's just what I feel like. That's what everything feels like at the moment, I'm completely numb to the world around me. My senses are both somehow heightened and dulled at the same time. Like all my nerves have curled off and died, but I'm melting in a pot of boiling lava. I chew the collar of my jacket, its black furry fabric is now slick and wet. ‘From my tears or from the rain?’ I think. I don’t want to know. I shuffle around on the bench and see him, still sitting there, still staring at me. I remember why I'm here, and why everything sucks so bad.

“Ashley” he says in a soft murmur,”‘Do you understand? I'm sorry, I didn't know what to say. Im just as confused as you are. . .”

I feel a bubble of rage rise up in me. Didn’t know what to say? How about “I don't really love you” or “I'm not serious about this relationship”. Didn’t know what to say my ass, more like didn’t want to say anything.

“Oh really?” I snap, “You seem to know what to say right about now though! You seemed to know the right things to say when you lead me on for four months!”

‘Ashley, you don't understand!’ He interjects

“Oh bullshit I understand perfectly! I'm surprised you fucking don’t consider you just dropped this dumpster fire on me!”

I throw my hands up, I’m livid. I know he doesn't deserve this but I'm too angry to control myself.

“Lets do a recap shall we?” I start to mimic him in a stupid singsong voice “‘Ashley I'm sorry but I don’t have feelings for you anymore’. Does that jog your memory? How about the part where you said “I’ve felt this way for a while’. Hm? Remember that part? Remember Bradley?!”

His cheeks are flushed bright red and he’s fidgeting with his watch. I can practically see the word ‘Guilty’ written in bold red letters on his forehead. I know this isn’t me, I would never do this. But I’ve got him on the ropes now. I can’t back down now. I need to make him feel at least a sliver of what I'm feeling right now.

“Did I mean anything to you? Did any of those four months mean anything?”

“What? Of course!” He sputters “You keep misunderstanding! I'm only trying to-”

“Oh for sure, I definitely wasn't just another whore to you. Just a second hole, there's someone else isn’t there?”

“Ashley please” He begs “You never cared -” “Of course I did! You have to -”

His hands are on his forehead, he's basically tearing out chunks of his hair. I can’t stop myself, I can feel the adrenaline coursing through my veins. It's scarily addicting. I stand up, towering above him./

“You cared? Prove it! Why should I believe you? Before you said you cared but now I find out you didn’t? How does that make any sense? Tell me Bradley! How does that make any-”

All of a sudden he throws his hands down and stands up.

“IM NOT HAPPY!” He exclaims.

I'm taken aback by this, is he trying to guilt-trip me?

“Yeah well join the fuckin’ club” I retort back.

“No, you don’t get it. I’m not happy, with myself.”

Oh shit. I realize he's being serious, I feel the anger flusheing from my body and being replaced by guilt. My knees give way accordingly, no longer coursing with adrenaline. I shakily sit down on the bench, he mimics my action. We’re both at eye level now. His blonde bangs cover his face but they don't hide the tears softly falling from his big brown eyes. I feel instant regret for the explosion of anger I just had.

“I don’t love myself,” He says through sobs, “It's true. I thought by loving you I would fill that hole inside of me, but it just made it bigger.”

Stupid, Stupid, Stupid. Why did I have to let my temper get the better of me? I tentatively reach out and touch his hand. He looks up at me and his bangs fall to the side. His eyes are red and puffy from crying.

“I'm so so sorry. I should have told you earlier, but when I went out with you, you just seemed so happy. . . I - I wanted to make you happy.” We’re both crying now, dammit. Why’d I have to let this boy into my heart.

“But the more I spent with you, the deeper that hole inside of me became. I didn’t understand how I could fill someone else with happiness, but be so devoid of it myself.”

He takes my hands in his, they’re hard and rugged from working too much, but I wouldn’t trade them for anything in the world. It's like the world has fallen away and it's just us. Two souls fighting against the stupid bonds of love.

“But don’t for a moment think you didn’t mean anything to me.” He stutters between tears “You were my world. You . . . made my life worth living.”

He looks away, unable to hold my gaze.

“I'm just sorry, I want to make it work but I can’t. I'm just, not there-”

I fight back tears “We can make it work!”

He looks at me again “You deserve someone better”

“You are better!”

He drops my hands. No amount of pleading will make him change his mind, I can see it in his eyes. It's like his whole thoughts are mapped out in there.

“Ashley, I need time. Im not whole. I feel so fragmented, so disconnected. I need time to fix myself.”

He bites his lip,

“Maybe someday when I’m better we can try this again. But today is not that day.”

Silence hangs heavy in the air, He’s said all he needs to say and I’ve heard all I need to hear, but it still doesn’t register. It still hasn’t fully hit me. I want to believe that we’ll go home at the end of the day and fall into bed, cuddled up watching some stupid 90’s movies. Holding each other in our arms. But I know that won’t be true. It can’t be won’t be true for a while.

I look at him again, like it’s the last time I’ll ever see him again.

“We can still be friends. . . right?” I mumble.

He looks at me and a smile grows on his face, like it's the funniest thing he’s ever heard.

“Of course!” he says with a small laugh “It’s not like I’ll never talk to you again. I just need some time.”

I nod slowly and without realizing it, I move in towards his soaking body. Wrapping my arms around him so tight I worry I might hurt him. I feel every curve of his body, every edge. His arms slowly wrap around my back. Squeezing with almost equal affection. I don’t want to let go, I could stay like this forever. Just me and him. He and I. Forever, for all time. Unfortunately, time continues onwards his arms slowly unwrap from my body as I cling on tightly. He gives me a gentle push to separate us and just like that it’s over. He gives me a gentle kiss on the forehead before turning around and walking away. Uttering not a word. I sit there in the rain, like a deer in the headlights. Still not feeling the freezing rain hammering away at me. Despite feeling emotionally drained, I start to cry again.

This time it doesn't feel like I’ll ever stop.

[bellamyblakru]

incredible, but true: @tkstrrand deserves to have a good day today.

✨since my memories never have aj for some reason im making my own✨

[gcdisms]

@triggerbigger​ 𝑠𝑒𝑛𝑡   :   iris :   if your muse could convey one last message to someone they have lost or left behind ,   what would it be ?  :^)    ——— （   BOTANICAL HEADCANONS  ‣‣  ACCEPTING ） 

ANDREA JONES SAWYER . “ i’ve never had the ability to accumulate my words ,  especially in regards to my feelings towards you -  in truth, i don’t think i ever will, no amount of education and reading will give me the skills to weave together the english language enough to walk away from this meeting feeling truly satisfied .  i think that’s okay,  i think that’s apart of the healing; i still have much of a journey ahead of me to finally feel the relief of ridding your looming shadow over me. you were my first taste of the bitterness in a world that never pretends to be anything but razor edges and disappointment - i resent you for that... hate you for it, how could i not ? you were supposed to be my mother, you were supposed to help guide me through the pain that living brings, instead you only added to the cruelty and threw me onto the blades ; that isn’t a mother, it took me a long time to realize what motherhood is, and i know stepping back, looking at how you treated me... no, how you treated me AND ashley - neither of us had it good. me, thrown to the side and forced to fend for myself and ashley, so suffocated by your love that he barely had room to grow roots beyond you and henry - i used to be jealous of him, in comparison its easy to see why . now ... i just hope he grows, learns, it’s never too late, not for anyone . 

in many ways im grateful for how life played out, i’m aware there is apart of you that is going to twist that - claim that as a result, it was you who made me. but that isn’t true,  i’m the reason im sat here today . you were a lesson, that’s all. one lesson stacked up on millions. i mean ... fuck,  you’re someone i never want to be, in another world, you cradled me in your arms and treated me as your own, an equal ; i dread to think that there is a me out there who took after you, at least this you  -  maybe in that world, you’re the woman you secretly want to be. 

you know... there was a moment where i think i was like you, a mini you - i was young, i was vicious and i was cruel, i didn’t care who i hurt only that it wasn’t me that was hurting, it felt good ... it makes me wonder if you experience the same rush in these moments that i did back then . and that girl ... that isn’t who i am anymore - i’m ... this, i’m better, i’m a work in process, but the project is beautiful.  and when i look at you, i simply see a cold, brutal woman who will never be free of her chains .  take it from me,  the heaviness of them will only grow worse if you don’t let go, if you don’t rip them from their attachment to your skin. it’s not easy, but surely it’s far better than the alternative ? 

i suppose you’re wondering why i’m doing my best to be calm, to be collected. admittedly, this is... hard for me. believe me, it’d be so easy to fall victim to my past self . to threaten violence, to scream obscurities and rub in my recent success in your face ; i think past me deserves that, i’m upset i have to deprive her of that . but she’ll understand, and she’ll also understand when i say this : i’m sorry. 

i’m sorry that you have never really felt love . i’m sorry that you see life as a business and nothing more . i’m sorry that my existence was such a burden on you,  i’m sorry that i will be the heavy confession on the tip of your tongue at the pearly gates when you’re forced to own up to every mistake you’ve ever made, i’m sorry that i’ll be the last thing that keeps you from total salvation . 

i ... truly, i have nothing else to say despite feeling a need to say more,  but it would be empty -  it would be rambles which i’m sure neither of us need .  and i need you to know,  whether or not you find peace is not my concern,  this was about me moving on, it’s about closing a chapter i never want to visit again,  but ... i’d be lying if i denied that i’m not hoping for the best for you . 

may the next world be kinder to you,  may you be kinder to those around you ... to yourself .  goodbye,  mother .  “ 

[autistic-beshelar]

'm loving everyone venting about Molly! Thanks! And I want to ask you how you imagined the finale was gonna be? I have this whole fanfic in my head about Molly realising he had a four leaf clover stuck in his hair and upon noticing it he would give it to Yasha. Then the M9 would deal with Trent and Molly would finally know how terrible of a person the dude was. And then the M9 would introduce Molly to everyone else they met and visit every place they left better than they found it.

that's so sweet!

it's weird, because while like every other molly fan, i've had thoughts on his resurrection and a fic series i'm working on, but i'd never really... thought about the end of the campaign, or what it might be like?

(ETA this ended up so long im so sorry i have a lot to say apparently and this isn't even all of it)

my biggest and most important thing: they are a family. they belong together. maybe they'll go off on their own for a while, or stay with their families, but the nein belong together.

for fjord... he spent so long trying to be someone else, and while he's learning how to be his own person now, he deserves closure on that part of himself. he deserves a last conversation with vandren, and then to move on, to explore new places, to find new goals for himself. there is so much for him now, the open sea with so much life and promise. he buys a ship, a new ship, all his own, not one borrowed or stolen from another, and jester paints its name, decorates its quarters, makes it a home. he wrangles the nein (yes, even veth, yes, even essek) into joining him, and they set sail, all nine of them, the way it couldn't be the first time. he shows molly the ropes, teaches essek how to navigate, and watches his crew, his friends, his family, learning from him, placing so much trust in him, letting him guide them, and sees how truly happy they are to be here with him. usually, the crew is him, jester, beau, and often molly and yasha, but sometimes he will leave for a time, entrusting the boat to orly. sailing isn't all he has now, there is more to see, to do, there are things for him on land now too, but the sea will always be home to him.

for jester... she deserves her happy fairytale ending. i think for a while she stays with her family, seeing her parents happily together, finally properly introducing her boyfriend, and just spending time with her mum in a way that she didn't get to so much when she was young. and then i think she travels, just for the sake of exploring, with no defined goal other than to sow the seeds of joy and chaos everywhere she walks. and as she travels, she begins to write. stories were homes to her as a child, and they're homes even now, for someone with such a powerful imagination. she writes of her adventures, of her friends, she writes of mystical and fantastical things, half of them real. she writes and writes, words and illustrations filling so many books, she gives them to beau, to yasha, passes them off as silly little things, as though they aren't brilliant works of art. all of the nein read her stories - yasha out loud to molly as she plays with his hair, caduceus and calliope in the quiet of their garden, caleb and essek by the light of their bedside table. and in time the stories reach others, scattered journals are copied and bound into books, and one day jester wanders a quiet, nameless town, and in the window of a bookshop she's never seen, embossed on the cover of a novel, there is a brilliant green door.

for caleb... oh man, he is a teacher. that is so perfect for him, and i've been thinking about it ever since his talk with luc. i think there's something so powerful about being the person he deserved when he was younger, about stepping into that position of power and authority and being so kind with it. he's so passionate about magic, and i think it's beautiful to see him come so far - from someone burned and traumatised and so convinced he was irredeemable, to someone who can take comfort in soft things, someone who some days, almost, almost believes he can be good. i think out of everyone, except perhaps veth, he stays home the most. he still adventures with the nein of course, and if there is ever a whisper of artefacts or hidden knowledge or some expedition or other, the nein are with him in an instant to investigate it. but more often than not he is home, making the empire a better place, keeping the fire warm for them.

for veth... i want her to learn that she is enough as she is. i want her to learn that she doesn't have to choose between wife, adventurer, mother. she is all of these things. i want her to accept that her transformation was not a return to her old self but becoming someone new. i think she goes home, as she promised, and i do think she stays there for a long while, a few years perhaps, making up for lost time. and she'll pretend that she's fine with that life, with staying home, with being a wife and a mother. but that isn't all she is, and eventually, with yeza's help, with the nein's help, she will accept that. she'll no longer see it as two lives, two identities. she'll be able to kill fearsome beasts and explore strange new lands with her friends without guilt or fear, and at the end of the day she'll go home and regale her husband and son with extraordinary tales of her and her friends' heroics (that may or may not be exaggerated).

for yasha... i want her to be happy and loved. she's come SO far, from someone running from her past, drowning in guilt and so unsure of herself, to someone strong and bold. i love that ashley said she would do little odd jobs - i think she would do that, go around helping people as they explore. like most of the others, i don't think she would truly settle down. i like to imagine she does have a house somewhere - maybe inspired by the clays, she has a home somewhere green, surrounded by flowers, somewhere quiet and calm and peaceful. a little cottage maybe, for her and beau, just somewhere to return to and feel safe, somewhere she can rest. but i think most of her time would be spent travelling, seeing all the wonderful beautiful things the world has to offer, being with her friends who love her for exactly who she is, who showed her that she was someone worthy of being loved, who taught her that it's possible for her to love herself.

for caduceus... i think, for a time, he rests. he's tired. not done, far from done, but tired. i think he stays with his family at the grove, tending to all the things that are now so vibrant and alive, feeling the walls he was so sure would crumble. but after a time, he would feel that he is supposed to leave. the grove is wonderful, and will always be his home, somewhere he will always return to, and i think throughout his life - throughout the nein's life, and of course they will come to rest there, after everything - he will come home, to tend to the garden, to watch over the temple while his siblings roam. i think he travels, too, but not so much to adventure. after everything he's been through i think he deserves some peace, and quiet. he travels all the lonely winding roads, all the quiet humming spaces, sees all the life in all the hidden corners. while several members of the nein travel with him, it's yasha that walks with him the most, happy to go at his pace, eager to share in that peace and wonder.

for molly... there is so much for him now. he is no longer covered in eyes, no longer has that weight on him, even if he does hold memories of it, in darker moments. he is him but brand new, able to forge himself into whoever he wants to be, and the nein give him so much space and so much time for that. i think he stays with the clays for a little while - while the others deal with trent, yasha, so so scared to lose him again, places all her trust in caduceus to take care of him. and when they return (to find him with freshly cut hair the same colours as his coat, and a particularly proud looking clarabelle), they just spend time with him, all the time they missed and more. fjord tells him of their journey, jester showing him her journal, giving him meaning for it all, and all the time yasha holds his hand, unwilling to ever let him go. it's hard, being gone for so long, and while he is so, so (embarrassingly) proud of his friends for all that they've gone through, and how much they've grown, it's also glaringly obvious that he can't keep up. he almost has it in mind to leave - he doesn't want to hold them back, and he can't help but wonder if he's really the molly they want - it's hard to live up to a memory, after all. and there is so much he's missed. they tell him he's a moron, obviously. he is their friend, and there is nothing they won't do for friends, and waiting, staying, is such a small thing to ask. beau trains him, at his insistence - she thinks it's a joke at first, tells him that she'd be a terrible teacher, just as she was a terrible student. she's wrong, of course, and molly grows stronger by the day. he has so many adventures with them, sailing the seas on fjord's ship, sowing chaos with jester, fighting side by side with beau. there is not a single day that he isn't with his friends, yasha most of all. they are with him through everything, though good days, so many good days, and through bad ones too. molly has so much time - time the nein have given him, as he once gave to them - to live, to love, to wander, to form new memories and experiences. to be everything he never had the chance to the first time, and so much more.

for beau... she is so, so scared at first. they saved the world. they stopped trent. they've done... everything they've set out to do. what's left? what's keeping them together? when molly tries to run it reminds her so much of how she felt before, how she thought to run, to leave them before they could leave her. he returns the favour, reminds her that they are family, reminds her that she has worth, and the nein want her to stay, that they keep her, just as they kept him. (she almost believes him, and definitely doesn't cry). she does so many things - she goes home with yasha once in a while, somewhere tranquil, somewhere to study and research, she travels with caduceus, learning to appreciate a slower pace and all the quiet contemplation and companionship it can offer, she travels with fjord, his first mate, his best mate, allowing someone she trusts to take the helm and lead her on adventures. and she studies - long gone are the days of pretending to turn her nose up at books - she is one of professor widogast's best (and most irritating) students, learning magic not to weave it herself but just to understand it, just learning for the sake of learning. when she confronts her father, fjord and caleb are there as they should be - fjord to talk, to use his words and his charm to help, caleb in quiet solidarity, a hand on her shoulder, just standing with her as she tears down her mentor, her abuser, and comes out stronger for it, just as she had been there for him. finally, she can put that behind her, and she stays with the soul, as their greatest expositor (though maybe one who never does their paperwork), rooting out corruption, seeking the truth, exploring new horizons.

for essek... he spends a long time waiting for the past to catch up to him. it doesn't. it already has, in a way, if only in his own mind, the once unfamiliar guilt that weighs heavily on his shoulders. it never goes away, not entirely, but time heals, and so does the presence of the rest of the nein, always in his life, for as long as they can be. though he and caleb have different goals, they overlap so neatly, and though essek has a place in his own homeland, he spends far, far more time living with caleb. he continues with his research, caleb and beau poring over his notes, sharing his excitement and passion. he doesn't go on adventures near as much as the others, preferring to stay home, but he visits them, in all their different homes scattered across the land - jester in nicodranas, the clays at the blooming grove, veth and her family on the outskirts of zadash, beau and yasha's cottage in a little forest near felderwin. he has homes scattered across the land, so many places he is always welcome, and while guilt never entirely leaves, nor does the knowledge that one day, of course, all this will end, he finds peace.

i guess the reason i've never thought about the campaign ending is because for me.. it doesn't, not really. the mighty nein are family, chosen family. they stay together, they find homes in each other, and they leave every place better than they found it.

[nialltlynch]

4, 5, 20 for writer meta? 😊

4. Share a sentence or paragraph from your writing that you’re really proud of (explain why, if you like)

Most know the rumors surrounding Niall Lynch and his affinity for the impossible. Most do not know that the same is true of his middle son. The impossible begets the impossible. Some would think it gracious that Niall decided to share this ability but, depending on who you ask, it may have been the most vindictive thing he's ever done.

ahhhhhh I wrote this before mister impossible was announced as a title. maybe a few months before?? i feel a strange sense of vindication when I think about it and even though the rest of the fic is a tranwreck (re: unrefined, unfinished, but still stirring in my heart) this little cold open was a lot of fun. (from the magpie comes at noon. it is, as previously mentioned, unrefined and unfinished, unfortunately)

5. What character that you’re writing do you most identify with? I already waxed poetic about adam so im going to wax poetic about declan because.... if you look at my ao3 I have a very clear preference for him l: which, and this might be a surprise (i shouldve said this in that other ask), doesnt mean that I love him the most. I love adam the most. but declan has just the right amount of distance from being personally relatable that I get him but I dont get him, you know what I mean? he's also certifiably insane and I love that for him.

20. Tell us the meta about your writing that you really want to ramble to people about (symbolism you’ve included, character or relationship development that you love, hidden references, callbacks or clues for future scenes?) biiiiiiiitch!! okay im going to ramble about my ashley extended cinematic universe (aecu) that only has one (1) work posted and so all context is basically lost but whatever. it's cool. it's been on my mind a lot and i'm not really sure I'm actually answering this question and Im so sorry but here we go! so like. ok here's the thing I never actually intended on making the aecu and when I was writing be careful how you touch me (aka the ashley 3 entry) I had no intentions of extending the story to include the others. but I just. think about them so much?? one of declan's major character flaws is how impersonal he can be. it's all well and good when he's being a dick to his brothers, but the way he thinks of and treats the ashleys is just so????? like im surprised none of them have ever keyed his car. and maybe they have!! and they absolutely deserve to do it!! but anyway. I wanted to explore declan through the lens of someone who doesn't know him and doesn't ahve the capacity to know him. how well does he actually present in the real world? I wanted to explore that while giving a bit of justice to the ashleys because THEY DESERVE SO MUCH MORE. so my plan for the aecu is to explore the aftermath of each of their relationships with declan and how that inexplicably leads them to joining boudicca and then there's a surprise 4th entry wherein things happen that I dont want to spoil but I like a lot. also they all kiss each other a lot.

send me a meta writer ask!

[dazaisfavoritewife]

Bakusquad with a black s/o - Someone calls you a racial slur

This idea has been on my mind for SO LONG! You might be wondering, “Then author-Chan, why didn’t you write it before?” WELL BECAUSE IM LAZY- So, I hope you enjoy :) -btw I’m going to use female pronouns, so if you want a male version or part 2 let me know-

~~~~~~~~

Bakugo

He is so appreciative, like this dude could care less about what skin color you are, but he just thinks your skin is BEAUTIFUL! Like, YES!! Racist Karen’s? Mans gotcha back.

But this one time, a racist bitch, *cough* BETHANY *cough* she called you a racial slur (even if I am african American i’m not saying it) and you obviously had to mop the floor with a hoe!

“Y/N, stay the f*ck away from my man!” Bethany screamed at you, you just rolled your eyes and stared straight at her.

“I’m sorry? Who’s your man?”

“Bakugo! You know that you ni-“

Oops! Bethany accidentally fell on your foot.. Then your hand.. Then your knee... She got beat the fuck up. While you were beating the absolute hell out of Bethany, the bell rang, but you were too busy with Bethany to notice that everyone was heading to lunch.

You snatched her by her hair, and started beating the crap out of her, when everyone saw they were frozen just there like ‘O’ but, Bakugo was cheering you on.

“YEAH! BEAT HER ASS N/N!”

You still didn’t give a fuck and just smirked, until your home room teacher, Aizawa came into the hallway.

“L/N! Bakugo! Detention after school!”

Best believe you just looks at him like, ‘N what?’

Bakugo just shrugged, and aizawa told us to go to lunch.

“This isn’t over Bethany..”

Then you just dropped her, grabbed Bakugo, and skipped to lunch, him proudly walking with you while everyone just stared at you in disbelief at how you’re acting like nothing happened after you just beat the shit out of a hoe. Not sorry!

Kirishima

Like Bakugo, he thinks you’re beautiful! He also thinks you’re real manly, because there are so many people who don’t think you belong in ua because of your skin, but he just deals with them himself.

But one day, someone took it too far and three girls game up to you and their leader just started insulting you, and one of them said a racial slur, you weren’t having it.

“Oh look! It’s Y/N! I thought you would’ve given up on becoming a hero, I mean how could you be popular when you look like.. That?”

“Like what? A badass? A queen? Beautiful? At least I don’t have 55 layers makeup, I have a thing called natural beauty.”

“What beauty? All we see is a ni-“

Oh no! They all somehow ended up on the floor with a bloody nose! Oops! You accidentally made your boot and their head best friends..

“I’m sorry, I can’t *thump* hear you other the *thump* noise! *thump thump thump*”

Needless to say, you beat all their asses. And in an instant you’d beat anyone and everyone’s ass if they even dared say a racial slur.

So, while in the process of beating three bitches asses, all of class 1-A came out of home room because aizawa wanted them to come and get you because you’re their friend, and they saw you beating the fuck out of three girls at the same time, and they all just stared at you in awe, and shock, except for Iida. He was against it obviously. And Bakugo, Mina, and Kaminari were cheering you on.

“Yeah Y/N! Kick their ass!”

“You got this Y/N!”

“Yeah! Whatever reason you did this, great job!”

“L/N That is not appropriate in school or outsie of it! Please refrain from beating people up!

Aizawa heard cheering and yelling outside the classroom and got annoyed, and went to check to see you beating three girls asses and the Bakusquad, (this time all of them) cheering you on.

“Is there a good reason for this? Otherwise detention.”

“These *thump* bitches *thump* thought they could try *thump thump thump* call me a racial slur.” Iida shut the fuck up real quick, and everyone was shocked that he actually started routing for you!

“...Continue.”

Then he walked back in the classroom. We stan men who don’t support racist bitches.

Kaminari

Kaminari respects you, you don’t take anyone's shit. Plus you’re beautiful, that’s a bonus to him. There were two particular people once who were giving you weird looks because of your skin, you just laughed in their face while Kaminari electrocuted them, then brought him home after he short circuited.

But one stupid bitch didn’t know how badass you are. So they tried using a racial slur, but we all know we don’t stand them. So this bitch named Rachel walked up to you and just started trash talking.

“Why are you even in the hero course? You don’t deserve it.”

“Because I earned it. You don’t deserve to be in ua at all if you’re bullying someone superior to a lowlife.”

“Whatever, you’re just a ni-“

She didn’t get to finished her sentence before you just roundhouse kicked a bitch, then just started beating the crap out of her.

“Say it again. I DARE you.”

While you were beating the shit out of her, class 1-A and aizawa just heard a bunch of loud and some very quiet crashes and thumps, and a lot of yelling.

“What in the entire world is going on out there..” Aizawa mumbled.

All of class 1-A including aizawa opened the door and walked into the hallway, to see you literally slamming her face into a locker, and occasionally kicking and punching her.

“Holy shit..”

Everyone was stunned, but Bakugo was laughing his ass off.

“L/N, what are you doing!?”

“SHUT UP IIDA!”

“U-uhm L/N..? Why are you hurting that person..?”

“THEY TRIED, THEY REALLY TRIED ME!”

“What did they do?”

“SHE THIUGHT SHE COUKD SAY A RACIAL SLUR”

“YOU GO! THATS MY GIRL!”

“Oh, everyone back in the classroom. Everything’s fine.”

Then they just went back into class like their classmate wasn’t beating the shit out of a girl. Needless to say, someone had to pull you off of her before you killed her.

Sero

Sero is a supportive king, and very underated. He thinks you’re the most beautiful women he’s ever met, and mans is extremely protective because once someone made a comment about your skin and you just ignored it but it kinda hurted :(

But one fateful day for two boys, they made the terrible mistake of saying a racial slur, they really thought they did something by getting beat the fuck up.

“I don’t know why they let YOU in the hero course.”

“I don’t know what led YOU to believe I’mma take your shit.”

“Whatever. You’re just a ni-“

And he just magically fell to the floor! Oh no! His buddy accidentally got slammed into him after! Damn it, they accidentally made contact with your boot!!

Class 1-A and 1-B heard you beating the shit out of the boys, so the teachers went into the hallway to see what the commotion is, but the students being their nosy selves went to see too.

Mr. Aizawa and Mr. Vlad King went into the hallway to see you beating the fuck out of two kids, class 1-A and 1-B looked through the door, and Bakugo just started cheering you on, so did Sero.

“Yes Y/N! Fuck em up!”

“I knew I chose the right one! Yes Y/N!”

Kendo being one of your friends, started cheering you on too.

“Go Y/N! Yes queen!”

Aizawa just turned around and walked back into the classroom after telling the students to go back to their seats. Vlad king broke you away from them though.. Aw shit you got detention.

Mina

(I got lazy on Sero’s because after Kirishima I took a break and started writing Kaminari’s after, and it’s 1 AM so I’m tired and watching YouTube to stay awake, this is probable gonna be shitty, they all are honestly.. I’m sorry btw I believe the theory that Mina is black so roll with it if you don’t)

Mina knows that you’re the most beautiful wiman alive, and you’re her queen, and vise versa.

One day this bitch named Ashley decided to insult your guys’ relationship and called you a racial slur, you definitely weren’t having it when it comes to Mina.

“Hey Y/N I heard you’re dating a girl.. That’s gross.”

“Hey Ashley, I heard you eat d*ck. That’s gross.”

“You’re a nasty ni-“

Ashley couldn’t finish her sentence because she was slammed into the locker, and became best friends with your fist and boot, whoops!

So, everyone was heading home because the final bell rang and everyone was packing up, and they were leaving their classrooms, and they all saw you beating the shit out of Ashley, and Mina was just smiling the widest smile that shines so bright, and she started cheering you on with Bakugo.

“Yes my queen! Beat her ass!”

“Yeah Y/N! Beat that extra!”

You got one last HARD kick in, before aizawa came up to you and pulled you off.

“Let me go!”

“Why were you even harming a student?”

“BECAUSE THIS HOMOPHOBIC BITCH CAME UP TO ME AND STARTED TALKING ABOUT ME AND MINA AND ADDED IN JUST THE CHERRY ON TOP AND CALLED ME A RACIAL SLUR!”

Aizawa went quiet and so did everyone else, then he just let you go and walked away, and everyone else just left the school like it was a normal day, we stand most of the people here.

(In case you’re confused on why it said Raven I accidentally put my name for this kind of stuff,sorry)

[merthurweek2024]

After an amazing week, we have reached the end of Merthur Week 2020! We hope you all had a fabulous time and @bellamyblakru​ and @teaamfreewill​ have a little message💗

a thank you from @bellamyblakru

holy shit, we’ve made it to the end. this entire week has been so incredible, and we just wanted to say a huge thank you all so much for participating and spreading awareness to this event! the amount of talented human beings who came together to create such badass, wonderful content was staggering. seriously. i have never seen so much pure talent in one place before—it’s making me tear up right now thinking about how much joy i had this week from you all😭❤️ 

ALSO, it’s been such an honor to admin this event besides one of my absolute favorite humans on this planet, aj. you, my lovely, talented friend, deserve the world. you are such a bright light in my life, and i hope we can do anyone again someday (soon?😉). we’re probably messaging about something else rn lmfao but thank you for being so incredible—you always make my days better, and i adore you so much🥺💞our angst brand™️ has grown from this and i wouldn’t have it any other way. okay, im sorry this became incredibly ✨sappy✨ tl;dr - guys are all fucking amazing and i cannot wait to see what content everyone makes in the future. we appreciate you all so much, thank you!!!🥺💞

a thank you from @teaamfreewill​

and here we are, the end of the merthurweek2020! This week has been an absolute joy to run and take part in! Thank you so much to everyone that spread awareness and supported this event, this entire week wouldn’t have been possible without you all 🥺 There has been so much beautiful content, support, and fandom love it truly warmed my heart to see it! ✨The merlin fandoms talent and and presences on tumblr has never wavered and I have never seen a fandom so kind and supportive!💞

like the support of the fandom, this event wouldn’t of been possible without my dear friend ashley, from producing amazing breathtaking content to always being there to support me I couldn’t ask for a better admin or friend and I can’t wait to create more events together!💞 i adore you sm and your content, thank you for creating this event with me and bringing so much joy to my life!🥺

Once again thank you ALL for partaking in this event and sharing your amazing work, we can’t wait to hold other events and see even more of what the fandom has to offer 💗

[aberfaeth]

ooh ☕️ criminal minds female characters?

criminal minds female characters my fucking BELOVED

im startin with seaver and todd bc hyping up widely detested female characters is like half of my personality lmao. ppl on the clock app are SOOO mean to them and for what! ashley seaver is GOOD she had a fun lil backstory! fun lil daddy issues! and god jordan todd is the world to me actually like idc that she was only in 8 episodes or whatever!!! like it could be that deep!!!! jordan todd perpetual perfectionist coming off of her job in counterterrorism where results matter more than methods, lying to that woman because it would get them the information they needed to stop a serial killer, floundering under hotch’s disapproval because she didn’t know, she had no idea. terrified that she’s fucked this thing up already. and when she’s given a second chance, promising herself she’s going to stick to it, she’s going to do whatever it takes. but she can’t, she had no idea it was going to be this bad and she can’t just move on like nothing happened, and it’s not a character flaw but she can’t help but see it as such. even when she breaks on the steps of normal hill’s house and rossi tells her it’s okay she just can’t believe it, but there’s nothing to do about it because she can’t fucking do this and there’s no way around it. so she picks herself up and holds the shame and the sorrow and the disappointment and says i hope you dont take her for granted.

um. anyways . moving on

megan kane was right, ellen and darlene from the pact were right. megan kane’s death actually one of the most heartbreaking moments in the show i think! i think about will you stay with me yes promise i promise parallel every day of my life like. hotch isnt the dad figure we deserve but hes the dad figure we need etc. also the moment in the pact when ellen gets arrested and looks thru the bus window and sees darlene getting away and just. grins so big despite the fact that she claimed not to give a shit about her. gay CINEMA!!!! i hope darlene beckett is doing ok she deserves the world

tara lewis is genuinely one of my favorite characters in all of media ever and i want to DISCUSS it bc ohhh my god every one of the episodes surrounding her is gold. false flag is so fucking choice and the way she stays true and good even in the face of a person literally designed in a lab to get under her skin is just. and the episode with her ex husband i forget what its called but that episode hurt me to my core for real. her feeding emily the lines about dealing with a loved one with an addiction was so heartbreaking aisha tyler emmy where. where is it

what else wht else. i love elle but the way ppl excuse the police brutality bc its like Girlboss Police Brutality is fucked up. blake is my wife and i wish she sticked around longer bc her and spencer’s relationship was really sweet like the crossword scene...sobbing. would have liked her to meet diana reid. kate callahan also so so dear to me also the fact that we almost had bi kate.....cm writers i just wanna talk

honestly i dont have many hot takes abt jj em or penny i just love them with my whole heart and soul. jeez this got long i am so sorry lmaooooo

[aviatrickss]

Vox Machina episode 34!

Did they beg Ashley to Skype in to keep everyone from dying lmaooo (I’m glad they did tho 💜💜💜)

Love that Percy is like “may I please have a health potion Grog :)” and Grog is like “alright” and then Vax is like “may I please have a health potion Grog” and Grog is like “fuck you I get to kick you in the nuts as hard as I want”

I love that Vax is like “omg you guys, you would yell at Scanlan if he kept almost dying from running into shit too fast too right??” and everyone is immediately like “Scanlan would never do that u fuckwit ur the only one with depression”

“~MEAT SHIIEEEELD~” grog im love you

“Hi Pike” agghhhhhhhhhh

Grog bulldozing Vax to hug Pike 💜💜💜💜 team big and small is back in business babyyy

BEAR PERCY NOOOOOOOOO

Keyleth guiding Trinket around the traps and Vex being like “he listens to you :)” I’m crying that’s so fucking cute

Vax calling Trinket “my nephew”... the Trinket love this episode is unreal, 10/10

Taliesin saying like actual science things.... wtf.... don’t like that....

Also I can’t believe not one fucking person has had the thought “maybe we shouldn’t be trying to press the button in the middle of the room that’s obviously a trap”

“In the absence of good ideas, bad ideas are, I think, always reasonable.” God that explains so so so much of Percy’s character, always shdhdhe

Also ngl I’m super salty about everyone giving Vax shit for running into dangerous stuff but like.... no one else fuckin wants to be the first one into the Trap Room.

OH MY GODDD THEY GOT GOT

VAX DIMENSION DOOR???? VAX MAGIC????

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

CASS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Silas is just like “hey 😏” and Vax is like “l8r heteros”

Oh God but Keyleth trying to talk him out if the charm hrghhhh

“BREAK THE OUTSIDE GEM” “I think Percy wants us to kiss Pike! He said the power of love will inspire him?!” “FUCK THE POWER OF LOVE!”

They are. So fucking stupid. God bless.

They JUST got back from break and Matt is like “btw, your demon gun now wants to kill your sister :) anyways...”

Okay like.... I know that they haven’t found out about Vax being Fate-Touched and stuff yet... but if the Briarwoods were going to sacrifice him to wake up Vecna or whatever..... God, I just really want to see Matt’s notes for this

“I’m on top of a thing. Everyone’s very attractive up here.” Vax you are so stupid and so bi and you deserve to get fuckin sacrificed

“Roses are red, violets are blue, we’re both gnomes, and you are soooo foxy.” Jfc

“The darkness demands your soul Silas.” PERCYYY

Poor charmed Vax is just like “why my sister shoot me :(“

Omg Delilah Briarwood coming face-to-face with Trinket who looks like a really obese Percy walking around on all fours..... bet she’s sorry she murdered his family now huh

Vax using himself as a human shield for Delilah is.... weirdly appropriate

God Silas Briarwood was already a foxy vampire and now he has a fuckin life-stealing sword??? Why are Matt’s NPCs all proficient in being as sexy as possible????

Flying Vex SLAPS yo

VAMPIRES ARE SEXY!!!!!

“Did you say you SOLD your SOUL to a HAG?” “LET’S DEAL WITH ONE PROBLEM AT A TIME.” Percy n Vax soulless buddies and Vex is gonna kick both their asses

“I’ve got this cool new character I’ve been working on.” Mr. Mollymauk????

SCANLAN SAYS NO!!!!!!

Silas being afraid of Pike lmaooo

Percy absolutely DESTROYING Delilah..... boy’s working thru it

Keyleth getting Silas with the lamest line ever omg.... I love love love that she was like ‘i’ve seen Percy do lines so I just think that’s what badasses do’ we STAN best friends

“I BROKE THE WORLD FOR US”

Love that they’re just taking potshots at her and Delilah is just fuckin ignoring them to do her ritual ejfjdjxnw

Vax is so scared when Vex flies in :(

KEYLETH TRIES TO BLOODBEND DELILAH

Oh my God Vex falling through the air with one fucking hit point nooo

TRUE 👏👏👏 LOVE’S 👏👏👏👏 CRIT 👏👏👏

THE POTIONS DON’T WORK????

Omg they’re all so scared Vax is having a fucking stroke

PERCY THROWING HIMSELF OFF THE ZIGGURAUT TO GET VEX OUT!!! (oh my god just like Vax almost died trying to save Cass I’m)

I really can’t deal with it, like I know that she’s fine but they’re all so scared hghhhh

Oh my god everything about this has such bad energy it’s giving me massive anxiety

VAX RUNNING BACK TO STAY WITH KEYLETH

I cannot believe they’re just fucking leaving a black hole beneath Whitestone what the shitttt

[ashflynns]

☄〔 HUNTER SCHAFER, TWENTY ONE, TRANS FEMALE, DREAM TRAVEL 〕╰ ASHLEY FLYNN just came over half - blood hill . you know , the child of HYPNOS who was claimed two months ago ? i’ve heard chiron say that she is PLAYFUL & EMPATHETIC , but if you ask the aphrodite kids , they’d say she’s LAZY & TACTLESS . i’d say they remind me of sleepy smiles and under-eye bags, messy buns and an unmade bed, running from your problems with bare feet & trying to hard to keep your friends but losing them anyway, especially since she’s FOR THE NEW CABINS . ( ✎ joey , 24 , she/her , bst . )

*insert nice graphic here aka for the love of god someone find me a photoshop link*

hi! its your resident sea witch joey here ready to bombard you with an encyclopedic knowledge of the greek pantheon and uk criminal law?? i guess??? if u dont already know, i’m the one with six (6) cats. i combined my task and intro because im LAZY and bad at intros so i’ll use paige’s stats as a crutch whoops. ash is the lazy laid-back stoner friend everyone needs. she has no trauma because she DOESN’t DESERVE IT so maybe the real trauma will be the friends we make along the way.

𝕓𝕒𝕤𝕚𝕔𝕤 .

name :  ashley finn

nicknames : ash, whatever cute names u wanna give her

birth date :  4th february (aquarius squad speak up!)

gender :  trans female

pronouns :  she/her

ethnicity : white

nationality : irish american

hometown : ?? idk american towns SUE ME but she’s from SOMEWHERE in oregon

demigod abilities : sleep manipulation, dream manipulation, dream travel

cabin number & godly parent :  cabin fifteen, hypnos

how did their godly parent meet their mortal parent? :  hlhglkhg so i thought it’d be funny if they met when ash’s mum participated in a sleep research study. i think i’m hilarious.

𝕞𝕦𝕤𝕖 𝕒𝕡𝕡𝕖𝕒𝕣𝕒𝕟𝕔𝕖 .

faceclaim : hunter schafer

height :  5′11″

hair colour : blonde

eye colour : blue/green.

dominant hand : leftie!

distinguishing features : her hair’s actually super curly she just straightens it a lot bc curly bedhead is a bitch to brush through in the mornings.

dress style : ugh this is gonna be hard to explain but like. you know those alt hippy stoner girls?? like that. likes baggy clothes and neutral colours. a lot of quote unquote ugly clothes with clashing prints. band t-shirts and whatnot.

𝕔𝕒𝕞𝕡-𝕣𝕖𝕝𝕒𝕥𝕖𝕕 .

go - to  weapon : HAH implying she willingly participates in capture the flag. she’d go for a xiphos because it’s the most basic dfkjg

ambrosia :  garlic bread. yeah she’s that kind of bitch

favourite camp location :  zephyros creek!

their opinion of their godly parent :  really unbothered tbqh. but she’s a very laid-back person to begin with. a ton of her school friends had absent dads. if she hadn’t come to chb so early then maybe the whole ‘i have powers with no explanation’ would’ve caused some resentment but hey, he’s a god. he’s a busy man. and being raised by a single mum made up most of who ash is, so it’s not like she’d change anything.

age they were claimed :  this year baby!

how they were claimed :  look dad’s timing was off but as far as he was concerned he claimed ash when percy made the deal. ash kinda always knew it was gonna be him so it was no surprise.

stance on the new cabins : for  the  new  cabins.

their opinion on lyssa pentelute :   as far as ash is concerned, lyssa’s whole shtick is just an excuse to shit on the kids who don’t have to suffer the same way she did. so, uh, she’s kind of a bitch? i have this in a bit more detail down below.

quests :  i’m gonna tentatively put no for now (unless anyone else on quests decides they’d like to have dragged ash along!)

𝕡𝕖𝕣𝕤𝕠𝕟𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕪 .

positive traits : playful, empathetic, laid-back, friendly but not a pushover, patient

negative traits :  lazy, tactless, aloof,  spacey, struggles to express said empathy, lack of focus

mbti :  Iinfp-t, the mediator

alignment : neutral good

hogwarts house :  hufflepuff

kinsey scale : JUST ASK IF SHES A LESBIAN OKAY?? THE ANSWER IS YES.

archetype :  somehow she matched equally with the innocent child and the wise old man *insert so what is the truth meme*

what candle scent are they :  vanilla

goals & desires :  well this one was tricky bc ash is a simple girl with simple needs and really just doesn’t want anything to change. she wants a life without the pressures of work and commitment, but that’s just not gonna happen, is it? her short-term goals are to practice fighting that urge to stay in bed all day and try to be a bit more productive. it’s not going well.

fears : explained more below but basically she has a fear of destroying all her relationships due to a lack of connect with the world

hobbies : when she’s not napping? probably gaming, going on nature walks, baking treats.

habits :  biting nails is the worst one. spacing out. you know that thing where you just?? stop focusing your eyes?? but you’re still tuned in to the conversation? that.

𝕙𝕚𝕤𝕥𝕠𝕣𝕪 .

so hear’s the short version kfjglkdfgjd ( for NOW ):

ashley’s mum, niamh, is third-gen irish immigrant. ash didn’t have a luxurious life or anything. they mostly lived off benefits or whatever niamh could pick up from her extremely lucrative dog-walking business. how she met hypnos was a literal joke. they met when she participated in a fucking sleep study and i guess they hit it off. typical story of dad fucks off/single parent yadda yadda. there’s no real ~~trauma~~ to ash. yeah, transphobia sucks and high school really sucked all but her mum’s been super supportive since she first came out and no one at chb has given her shit yet. niamh’s still around and ash goes back home every couple of months to visit her. they have a pretty good relationship. it’s all cool.

i feel cliche saying she was a ‘dreamy’ girl but dreamy or spacey really is the best word for it. mixed with your typical demigod adhd you get a kid who really struggled with school. well, it’s not like she struggled - ashley’s a smart gal - but the teacher’s struggled with her. i guess it was hard for them to understand that ash actually does her best thinking when she’s asleep.

struggles to keep friends - maintains a persona of aloofness and apathy but actually cares way too much. the narcolepsy hinders her ability to form proper connections ( although she’ll argue the sCiEnTiFiCaLlY pRoVeN fAcT that napping with someone for half an hour does more to build trust than anything else ). and no one’s really that fond of ash popping into their dreams. maybe they shouldnt have so much to hide, huh?

her biggest ‘’’ inner struggle ’’’ shall we say is the pressure to be productive. let’s face it, she IS a lazy bitch, and that’s pretty much an inherited nature. getting a job sounds like hell, she sucks at combat training, she really could NOT be bothered with camp politics and god wars and whatever else. why can’t she just sleep and dream walk all day? monster’s are out there man, she’s gonna die some point soon anyway. but that doesn’t mean  she doesn’t feel guilty about it all. it’s kinda hard not to.

so, moving on to the ISSUE AT HAND. so when you walk through dreams and you sleep for 20 hours of the day, it’s not hard to figure out who your dad is, even if he never turns up. like, seriously, who else would it be? so yeah, sure. she was only claimed a couple of months ago. but she wasn’t completely in the dark like some of her other campers, and she respects that, truly. she got the luckier end of the stick and its not hard to understand the resentment among the minor demigods and the unclaimed.

HOWEVER, she’s very much FOR the new cabins. as explained above, lyssa’s a bitch whose taking her mummy issues out on others. ash loves bunking with the hermes kids but she’d like a space of her own and at the end of the day who the fuck is lyssa to make that decision?

𝕖𝕩𝕥𝕣𝕒 .

pinterest! (its a wip there’s not much IM SORRY)

spotify (now this is the one thing i will never let u down on)

wanted connections coming soon!

[deeneee]

Lost [Leon x Reader] (PART ONE)

Note: here it is. It is a little sad, but not really. RE4 LEON is just about to be introduced! IM EXCITED! This’ll be a two part or more?? I want to write some action but idk. This is turning out more of a story, but oh well 😂 it’s not really a story, but idk. 

Master List

Previous

“I heard you’re getting a partner for your new mission,” you speak, looking over at Leon who’s sitting at his desk. Leon looked up at you and nodded.

“Yes, I’ve met him before, actually. He’s been training with me,” Leon muttered. You looked over Leon’s partners files on your computer screen, narrowing your eyes.

“Hmmm, Jack Krauser. . . ,” you mumbled and looked at his picture, “he look pretty buff.”

“Yeah, I’ve been told that the mission is pretty dangerous, so they paired him with me.” It’s been almost 2 years since Leon joined your office. For the past couple of months, Leon has been going on pretty dangerous missions, but they’ve all been successful. No doubt about it, Leon is very skilled. So far, he is the most reliable and skillful agent in the agency. His physical experience had also changed a little, like his expression. You’ve noticed that after every mission, he seemed to look more dull and serious. His hair became darker and he also became a bit more sarcastic. He’s lost that innocent look to him and if you were to be honest, it was kind of sad to see Leon change like this. Not that it’s his fault, but it hit you that Leon has seen so much that it’s even taken a toll on his physical appearance. The past couple of months had been hectic for the both of you. Unfortunately, you both lost a member. . .Frank. He disappeared on a mission and was found as a monster later on. It was hard to take in, but it had happened and you couldn’t do anything. You and Leon took it hard and mourned for a couple days. You looked over at the empty desk next to Leon, remembering the times when Frank would always scold you. It hurt, but the best thing to do is keep moving forward, and you knew that this is what Frank would want for you and Leon to do. “You okay?” Leon’s gentle voice broke you from your thoughts and you turned you attention to him. His blue eyes held worry and you gave him a small smile.

“Yeah,” you responded, “just reminiscing.”

“If you feel like crying, you can always come to me,” he patted his shoulder, “you can cry here.” You chuckled, feeling a slight burn making its way to your eyes.

“There’s no way I’m going to cry,” your voice cracked in between as tears blurred your vision. Leon’s eyes softened at the sight of you bringing your hands up to cover your eyes. He quickly walked over to your side and grabbed the chair beside you and sat down, scooting close to you. His gruff hands patted your back as you sobbed quietly. One thing Leon realized is that he hated seeing you cry. The best thing to do was to be there for you.

-skip-

Before you knew it, Leon left for his mission, and it was time for your mission. You were sitting in the helicopter, dressed in your usual fighting attire. You’ve never felt so lonely before, and you weren’t sure why. You looked out the window, watching the world from above. It was beautiful, green, and intriguing. How deceiving the world looked from above. It was just you and the pilot in the helicopter, and the sound of the blades slicing the air.

Right when you got back from your mission, you heard so many things about Leon accomplishing his mission. People were calling him a talented agent, and a hero. You weren’t sure of the details, but he had successfully finished his mission. Unfortunately, his partner did not make it, and after hearing this, you hurried to your office, opening the door. Your heart clenched at the sight of Leon sitting in his chair, back hunched, and face covered with his arms. You quietly walked over and sat on Frank’s seat. His shoulders were slightly shaking, and his hands were clenched. “Hey,” you softly spoke, bringing your hands to rub his back. The best thing to do was to be there for him, and you did just that.

A few minutes later, Leon turns his head and looks at you, his head sitting on his arms. His eyes were raw and puffy, streaks of tears dried on his cheek. “Thanks,” He hoarsely said, and then sniffled. A side of Leon that only you have seen, yet a side of him that breaks your heart. You nodded and gave him a little smile. He got up and wrapped his arms around your frame, “At least you’re back safe.” You leaned into him and closed your eyes, wrapping your arms around him. “I don’t know what I’d do if I lost you, too.”

“I’m not going anywhere,” you whispered, and he squeezed you, “I wouldn’t know what to do if I lost you either, Leon.” Just thinking about it drove you into devastation. Leon has been there for you ever since, and if you were ever to hear such bad news; you’re afraid that you’d go on a rampage. Leon is a great friend— a great person, and he deserved a great life. You pulled away from him and gazed into his beautiful eyes. “Let’s survive this.”

——

Time flew by and before you knew it, it was already the year 2004. Time passed, and you changed. You’ve been told that your smiles weren’t as radiant as before, and that you seemed dull. You didn’t have that glow anymore. You could say it kind of disappeared when you stopped seeing Leon. Work made you both so busy, that you never had the chance to talk or see each other. It had been 3 years since you’ve seen him. A long, cold, dark 3 years. You heard that he recently rescued the presidents daughter, Ashley. Definitely heroic of him. You were proud of him. You’ve thought countless times how you wanted to visit him sometime, but you were too much of a wimp to. You were afraid he maybe disliked you, or worse, had forgotten about you. One thing for sure, you’re glad he’s doing fine and alive.

“Hey, you listening?” your martial arts instructor, Luke, questioned. You shook yourself from your trance and shot him a kick to his side. He stepped back and winced, rubbing his side. “I wasn’t asking for a kick, dude,” he muttered and you stood up straight.

“Sorry about that,” you apologized, sheepish. Luke has been your instructor ever since you got into the agency. You felt like letting off some steam, so you invited him for a spar.

“Anyways, Hunnigan is on her way to talk to you,” Luke said, his brown hair drenched with sweat. You nodded and wiped off your sweat with a towel that lay on a chair, near the mat. The thudding sounds of people being thrown on the floor, and yells was all you heard as you took a swig of your water. “So, what’s been on your mind?” You glanced over at Luke and pressed your lips into a line.

“I thought about ‘him’ again. I just miss him,” you admitted and shrugged.

“Oh, right. Your ‘lover’,” Luke cooed, raising his brow.

“No way,” you interjected, “just a good friend.” Leon’s face flashed in your mind and a small smile made its way to your lips.

“Look at that smile,” Luke pursed his lips and you rolled your eyes and shook your head.

“Leave me alone, Luke.” You could hear the clicks of heels approaching and you turned to the door, only to see Hunnigan walking towards you. Today she wore a striped navy blue suit with black heels. Not a bad look for her. “Hunnigan,” you greeted with a nod and she stood in front of you, smiling softly at you.

“Hey, [Name]. I came to tell you that he’s doing fine.”

“Ooooohhh, so that’s how you know your lover is doing fine,” Luke exclaimed.

“I’m glad,” you breathed a sigh of relief, and Hunnigan smirked.

“So, when should I tell him that I know you?” She questioned, pushing her glasses up.

“Y-you shouldn’t,” you retorted and crossed your arms. Luke and Hunnigan looked at each other and chuckled. “Anyways, my mission is in a few days, got any info for me?”

“Ah, right. A woman named Blair Gage is suspected of producing BOW’s in Alaska. You’re instructed to destroy her lab and bring her back alive,” Hunnigan handed you a folder and you took it, looking through the woman’s profile. She had piercing jade orbs and platinum blonde hair in a pixie cut. She didn’t look that intimidating.

“She’s young,” you muttered, looking at her age. She’s 28, which is the same age as you. What could she be doing with these BOW’s?

“You’ll have a huge surprise during your mission. I hope you enjoy it,” the black haired woman nodded and then walked off. You watched her go and narrowed your eyes, wondering what it could be.

“She probably talking about those BOW’s,” Luke joked and you looked at him, shaking his head.

“That wasn’t a really great joke.”

“Yeah, whatever, I’m leaving.”

——-

Finally, it was the day of the mission. Here you were, once again, on a helicopter by yourself and looking over the landscape. Your ear piece made a sound, until you heard Hunnigan’s voice. “Alright, can you guys hear me?” She questioned, and you furrowed your brows.

“What do you—-“ you paused when you realized someone was talking the same time as you. Someone else is on the line? Who the hell?

“Hunnigan, who’s the other person?” A deep voice asked, and it sounded so unfamiliar.

“No time for questions. You both are almost at your destination. Prepare for landing.”

“Whoever you’re partnering me with, I hope they’re cute,” The man commented and you narrowed your eyes. A partner? This is the surprise? He sounds kind of like a jerk. You turned off your communicator and huffed, looking around.

“Who does this jerk think he is?” You questioned to no one in particular.

——

BEEP!

“Oh, she just hung up,” the man said.

“Well, if you hadn’t said that, she wouldn’t have.”

“I must’ve pushed some kind of button,” he muttered.

“You don’t say?” Hunnigan sarcastically remarked.

“I was also being sarcastic, Hunni—-“

BEEP!

“. . .Alrighty then.”

Next

[mugsywrites]

Fic Update

Friends I’ve been out of town the past week because my uncle died and I had to drive my dad (who’s in terrible health himself) back to our home town for the funeral. I haven’t spoken to my uncle in over 10 years and we were never close but I’m still heartbroken for my dad. Plus I fucking hate being in my hometown (the locals aren’t quirky, they’re racist and the town is so small every time I go out I’m at risk of running into my fucking ex).  So I haven’t gotten around to writing much. But here, have a taste of something I started because I was in a negative frame of mind: (eventual Jaaryl)

The Unquiet Grave

Over thirty years after Daryl Dixon was murdered a small fleet of construction trucks show up on the ridge just above his grave. He isn’t sure of the exact date until one day while drifting through the site he sees an open newspaper—September 21, 2010. Boyd Guthrie and the rest of the Savage Sons had beaten Daryl to death behind Willie’s bar on October 5, 1979.

Daryl keeps waiting for the construction crew to uncover his bones but much to his relief they never do. When he first died he’d been trapped in his body—one minute the world was slowly fading out as Boyd stomped the back of his head again and again the next things snapped into focus. “Oh geez Boyd,” Ashley Morrow was saying as he stared into Daryl’s dead face, “You killed him.”

“Fucking queer deserved it,” Boyd replied.

“Merle ain’t gonna be happy.”

“He’ll get over it,” Boyd said easily.

They wrapped his body in a tarp and threw it in the back of Ash’s pickup truck where Daryl spent several terrifying hours in blackness before hearing Merle’s voice screaming, “I want to see him! I want to fucking see him!” The tarp vanished and Daryl was looking up into his brother’s tear-streaked face. “Oh my sweet Jesus,” Merle whispered. He laid a shaky hand on Daryl’s cheek and Daryl realized he could feel it. Could feel the whiskery kiss that Merle pressed against his forehead. Boyd was jabbering away, saying he was sorry but what did Merle expect him to do when his queer brother tried sucking his dick? What the fuck was any man supposed to do?

Daryl could see Merle’s eyes, could see that Merle didn’t believe the bullshit coming out of Boyd’s mouth and that even though he said, “I understand. Tried beatin’ it out of ‘im myself since he was little,” that Boyd was not forgiven. Merle kissed him again and tenderly replaced the tarp over Daryl’s face.

After that was hours of driving over bumpy back country roads. They stopped and he could hear the scraping of earth, then he was dragged out of the truck and thrown into the ground. Daryl had calmed down a bit but started panicking again at the first feeling of the weight of earth thrown on his remains. The men burying him said nothing but Daryl still knew one of them was Merle.

No Bubba don’t let them, he screamed internally as the weight of earth grew greater, in his panic reverting to his childhood word for his big brother. More weight, the noises from the outside world fading until he could hear nothing. He was imprisoned in darkness and silence and could do nothing but scream helplessly and pray for madness oh god this was hell, worse than any fire or demons or—

The world shifted and Daryl was standing outside in a dark woods at night. Merle was kneeling down at Daryl’s feet, palm flat against the disturbed earth and breathing raggedly.

“Merle?” Boyd’s voice, “We best be on our way.”

“Need a minute,” Merle said in a thick voice, “He was my brother even if he was a queer.”

“Fine,” Boyd muttered, “I’ll be in the truck.”

Daryl was too relieved to be free from the earth to be angry. He could move, he could turn around, and when he looked down he saw he was dressed in the simple black t-shirt and jeans he’d worn to Willie’s that evening.

“Thank you fucking Jesus,” Daryl muttered. He heard the door to the truck slam shut, “If that prick didn’t want to waste his evenin’ up here he shouldn’t’ve bashed my head in.”

Merle let out a choked sob, hand going to his face. Daryl reached down and squeezed his shoulder, surprised that he could do it, surprised that he could feel the leather of Merle’s jacket beneath his hand. It didn’t go both ways; Merle took no notice of his brother’s comforting gesture. Merle’s fists balled up into the earth and he growled out, “Fuckers will pay for this, baby brother. I swear to you on everything.” Then he was getting to his feet and walking back to the truck.

Daryl never saw him again.

He watched the truck as it faded off into the distance. The woods were black but Daryl could still see, and he drifted over to his grave. There was a bit of metal flashing in the moonlight, and Daryl bent down to examine it. He saw it was the Zippo lighter Merle’d brought back from ‘Nam; on the side a hand-engraved skull and the words, 15 KILLS IF YOU ARE RECOVERING MY BODY FUCK YOU. He’d laid it on Daryl’s grave as a miniature tombstone, and later Daryl would wonder if that simple act had been what had freed him from the ground.

He supposed he’d never know.

Three decades later he watches the construction crew trample over his grave again and a-fucking-gain he wonders what would happen if his bones were ever discovered and given a “proper burial”. Wonders if he’d pass over into the Great Beyond or start haunting whatever pauper’s grave is his new resting place. Neither option is particularly appealing—he knows where he’s going if it’s the former and it isn’t the place with the harps and angels floating on fluffy clouds. If it’s the latter he’s not interested in hanging around for eternity in the graveyard of Mountain View Baptist next to his Daddy. He doesn’t know if graveyards are full of ghosts or if he’d have to actually talk to Will Dixon and isn’t interested in finding out.

Daryl is perfectly content to stay where he is. He’s not exactly happy, but he’s at peace. The area around his grave is a beautiful spot, and Daryl can think of worst places to spend eternity.Daryl spends his days wandering through the woods cataloging the flora and fauna and marveling at the endless variety of life teaming in this corner of the Southern Appalachians. He finds everything from black bears to blue ghost fireflies; the latter flickering to life for only a few weeks in wet summers.

On the rare occasions he feels lonely he goes to the stretch of the Appalachian Trail that is just inside the boundary of his haunt. It can get fairly lively depending on the time of year, there’s an overnight shelter in Daryl’s range. Solitary hikers stop and sometimes read and Daryl can look over their shoulders. He only gets a chapter or a two at a time this way, random glimpses at a larger story he’s cut off from. Still it’s something. Whenever he gets bored or depressed he just switches off for a bit and when he returns to the world days or years later he’s refreshed.

Daryl would like to switch off for the duration of construction but he can’t, much to his annoyance. There’s too many people for too much of the day. He’s not sure exactly what causes him to come back to the world after switching off—there’s no rhyme or reason to it—but having people around seems to have something to do with it. He’s never had this many people around, never had them this close to his fucking grave. Heavy workmen’s boots tromping everywhere as they tear down his trees and scare off his animals.

Daryl can affect the physical world. It requires a great deal of sustained concentration and effort for not a lot of results but since he can’t fucking switch off he has nothing better to do. Workers lose their keys, are startled by loud bangs, equipment breaks down, wood piles are toppled over. He follows the construction foreman around, placing his hand on the back of the man’s neck. This is the hardest thing to do and he doesn’t always succeed but when he does the foreman stops dead in his tracks and shivers all over.

“Tobin?” says one of the crew, “You alright, boss?”

“Something just walked over my grave is all,” the guy replies, looking spooked.

“Motherfucker you’ve been tromping over my grave all fucking month,” Daryl snarls, “Let’s see how you like it.” He places his hands on the back of Tobin’s neck and pours every ounce of concentration and anger he has into it. He breaks out the big guns, remembering the night he was murdered, every thrown punch and desperate attempt to survive before he was overwhelmed.

“Boss!” the worker says, and lunges forward to catch Tobin before he can collapse. The beefy guy is pale and his eyes are glassy and he looks on the verge of passing out. Daryl feels savagely triumphant, but only for a moment. It’s replaced by guilt so intense he’d give anything to be able to just switch off and not have to deal with his thoughts or the bright lights of the world any longer. Wants these people gone so he doesn’t feel the pull of his grave so strongly and can leave. Wants to just be able to fucking rest. It’s not this fucker’s fault, he’s just doing his job.

“Sorry,” Daryl mutters, even though the guy doesn’t know he’s there and can’t hear him even if he did, “I’m bein’ a dick.” He decides to leave them alone from that point on, wandering among the fringes of the site, following what animals haven’t been scared off. Watches the building come together—it’s a log cabin with enormous picture windows looking out over the valley.

In the end it turns out to be a good thing he can’t switch off. He might have missed when Aaron showed up for the first time if he had been.

[jazminconfessionals]

Sept 5, 2022. Monday. 9:28pm

Jazmin,

I would give up anything in this moment to have me by your side, hugging you ever so tightly, shielding and protecting you from all the sadness you endured from your mom this weekend. I wish I was there for you. Im sorry I didn’t see the signs that you needed my help. I wish I was there for you when you needed me the most. I had no idea you were going through all of that since first thing Sunday morning. You expressed to me that you were anxious and you felt it on your chest. But I was slow to connect the fact that you were anxious about facing your mom on Labor Day. I had no idea that your New Jersey story was a way of telling me that you felt loved, safe, and welcome with Ashley’s family. I didn’t know it was your way of working through your anxiety. I also think that when Ryley’s pic popped up on snap, I thought you were purposely trying to hurt me, that you’re hiding something from me. I know it’s not an excuse, but I think I am getting my period because I’m easily irritated. I usually can control my emotions but I’m sorry if I lashed out of jealousy and didn’t see the reason behind your story. My hormones got the best of me, and therefore, I hurt you in return. I wish you wouldn’t told me what was happening but I can see it now why you couldn’t. It was a lot of emotions happening at the same time. It appeared that the world was against you. I wish I can carry all the hurt for you, shield your from your mom’s hurtful words. You are worthy in my eyes. You are enough. You are an inspiration. You are a successful entrepreneur that is going to be even bigger and better than before. On top of that, you will be an even more inspiration and stronger as a future mother. I love you, wholeheartedly. Especially on the hardest days. Last night, when our 45-yr-old stage 4 breast cancer patient died, his husband was at the bedside sleeping. We had to wake him up and tell the bad news. He wept so loudly and I couldn’t picture losing you like that husband lost his wife. But when you broke up with me and kept pushing me away, it hurt me that you rejected me without explanation. It felt like there was someone else. I didn’t know you were already drowning yourself in sorrows. I wish you would’ve told me. But I can understand why it was so hard for you to be vulnerable. Please come back. I don’t want this to end. I really thought you no longer want me. I cried so hard as soon as I got into my car after work. I was crying during my break trying to understand what just happened but you couldn’t give me the answers. I got angry because even when I was trying to reassure you, you cussed me out. Anyways, Im just letting you know that I’ll be right here waiting when you’re ready. Please have an amazing trip to Florida. You deserve this time to learn and grow. I’m so proud of you. I’m rooting for you always.

I love you with my entire being. You’re not alone. I’m right here.

Love,

Shar