#imissmymama

[tinatamale]

Mama, your love and wisdom touches me everyday. I know you are with your mama, all your loved ones and the Ancestors above hopefully remembering the good times of your life when you were here with us. Know I reminisce about you, tell funny stories and channel you when I cook. 💙 #natividadramos August 1, 1931 #imissmymama @mama tamale (at Oakland, California) https://www.instagram.com/p/CgukWdPvcMr/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[henryskat2014]

Today has been exceptionally tough. Sorting through my old house has been an emotional rollercoaster and it has left me feeling rather bereft and alone. 6 weeks have come and gone and I don't feel any easier nor has the time brought me any solace. I am not ready to accept that I will never eat another family meal in that house or share another happy memory with my Mama. This is the beginning of the end of such a huge chapter in my life and truth be told I just wasn't prepared for it all to be snatched from me so prematurely. Many tears, laughs, much pain and happiness occured between these walls. Not all memories bring fond feelings but it was my home and even now, it still feels like home. I know the reality is it is NOT my home and has not been so for 13 years but it was where a piece of my heart lived and it's tough to watch that piece of my heart be discarded like rubbish. This is NOT gonna be easy. #bereavement #grief #imissmymama #loss #sad #honestfeelings #COVID19 #covidvictim #coronavirus #coronaruinseverything #feelings #nostalgia #memories #home (at London, Thornton Heath) https://www.instagram.com/p/B_yNiwUp2J-/?igshid=102mapm42xsm1

[maeomans]

I lost my mom to breast cancer, she was only 52 just a few hours after she was diagnosed, it has been a week and day since then and I miss her more and more each day, so do me a favor hug your mamas tight because you never know when you will lose them

[honeychildoz]

No filter. No editing. All juicy fresh and grown by a friends 15 minutes from my front door. 💝 The aroma of Tasmanian summer is voluptuously ripened 🍒stone fruit and 🫐🍓berries and sweet mastic-like grass, punctuated by fresh cut grass 🌱and the occasional steel plate from am Aussie🇦🇺 flat top grill waiting for snags or fresh caught 🎣fish. Everything smells and tastes so much more intentional and idyllic.😋 I don't know if it's because I am in the heart of a suburban cul-de-sac filled with elders and nuclear families who all grow a little something. Or if it's the rarified air and water. Or the pockets of immigrants like me who or country folk (also like me) who have planted what the think home tastes like. I'm sure I'll never know. But today when it's gorgeous and sunny, everything is more than ok in my heart. I feel so blessed to ruminate on my purpose over this 💧juicy bowl of jewels. I just wish my Momma❤️ could have just once, put her barefoot in the grass by my fruit trees and smile a fresh burgundy cherry feasted smile... 🍯🍒 #honeychildscreole #tasmania #aussuesumma #tasmanianproduce #juicy #cherriesandberries #seasonal #vegan #homegrown #imissmymama #mothernaturelivesintassie #fruit https://www.instagram.com/p/CZ3IS8EvrJO/?utm_medium=tumblr

[adventuresofarainbowcrip]

“I just want a hug.” Missing my mom, missing my family and dealing with those feelings in my everyday life.

Written on November 14th, 2021

Before you experience something for yourself, you can only imagine how it’s going to be. I have dealt with anxiety throughout my life, and one of my biggest fears used to be (and still is in some ways) being away from home or being away from my parents, especially my biological mom (I have two moms). Growing up, I cried when my parents left me at preschool, they couldn’t go out on a date night together without me becoming super upset, and even though I knew my parents were coming back, it still stressed me out a lot. As an older child and teenager, I didn’t often spend the night at friends’ houses. I tried for the first time at 8 and ended up having to have my mom come get me at night. When I was 13 and 14, I only had a couple of close friends whose houses I felt comfortable at and even then it wasn’t often.

I do think that part of the reason that I experienced “separation anxiety” often as a young child and teenager and even as a young adult is because I have had to have adults around me to support me much more than the average child does. As a little kid, I had to have adults around a lot to help me with things that other kids didn’t need help with. I think that, coupled with my “sensitive” personality made it such that I felt afraid to be independent and was very used to having adults around a lot.

When I was preparing to move, I felt scared when I thought about all the time I would be spending away from my family and my mom. I thought of how I would maybe have to deal with uncomfortable things without her around, such as being sick (see my previous post for more on that). I thought that I would miss her desperately and very often. I thought I would cry a lot because I missed her.  

After my first few weeks here, I realized that what I had imagined was in fact not at all the case. At first, I think I was just so excited about being here and actually feeling okay and taking care of myself that I didn’t really miss her much. I would have small moments where I missed her, like the first time that I slept here completely alone (post coming soon about that), but in general I did not miss her a lot and desperately as I had imagined. I was very excited about my new capabilities and for a good while ( I would say the first month or two) I felt pretty invincible, like now that I had passed this final frontier, I could do anything.

Now that I have been here for a while longer (roughly six months since we signed the lease and 4 months since I actually started sleeping here full-time), I am having slightly different feelings. I do miss my mom and my family, here is how it has showed up for me. I have noticed that sometimes I miss my family more when I am around them, as opposed to when I am here. It seems counterintuitive but it’s happened a few times. The first time I noticed it was about a month ago when I went over to my family home to spend a night. I missed them somewhat before going over, but then the feelings intensified when I got there. I asked my other mom about it and she said that it’s happened to her before too. It’s as if you don’t really realize what you are missing until you go back there and then your brain is like, “Ohh yeahh, this is what I miss.” And when I am at my apartment for several days on my own, I get into a rhythm of being here without my mom and family and taking care of myself here, so when I go there, it reminds me of how I don’t live with them anymore.

I think that being sick recently has made me miss my mom more, especially her hugs. When I was sick, I really wished I could have a hug from her, but I had to comfort myself.  A while ago I told her that when she gives me a hug, I sometimes feel like I have to make it last until I see her again. So she has started dropping by sometimes after work just to see me a bit and give me a hug. And when I go visit on the weekends, I give my family hugs. 

Another thing that helps us both feel better : my mom and I text each other good night every night. If I forget, she remembers. It’s nice to have that little check-in and connection with her even if I’m feeling fine and over here living my best life. 

I don’t miss my mom how I thought I would, but I definitely miss her and my family at times to varying degrees.  I text her more now than I did when I lived with her. Whatever your experience is with adjusting to living in your own space and missing those you love, know that you will find ways to work with those feelings and that it is okay to feel however you feel. This is just my experience but I hope you find it helpful.

See you soon with another post!

Nirvana 

[peachy-queen]

A reminder to myself. In time it will bring me peace and comfort... just not yet. The pain and grief is still raw... I'm still in denial to a certain extent. I'm slowly cycling through the stages of grief, one hour at a time, one day at a time. 💔😢 #imissmymama #imselfish #iwasntreadytolethergo #shesatpeacenow #nomorepainandsuffering #alzheimersisathief #anotherguardianangel https://www.instagram.com/p/CMZDJXJjX4qs8J5aGBKiD-TowUp5UJmXhmXx1k0/?igshid=n669m4tue4wg

[gigiginandtonic]

happy danksgiving this is a psa i’ve been pissed off my entire life 

[darlingbhomesoon]

This little girl is 3 months old. Dropped off on my front porch by some neighbors, so scared and frightened... wondering where her mama was. Now, she is independent and so sassy but still comforts me when I cry. I have said it a thousand times and will say it a thousand times more... I am so thankful that I have the ability to take care of these kitties and that they give me a reason to live when everything else seems so dark. I wonder all the time why i have been entrusted with their care, even after I let my mom down, when she needed me the most. I carry the weight of her death everyday and cant help but worry I'll let everyone else down too. I loved my mom more than anything and wish so hard, that she were still here. I can only do my best, even if I feel it's not enough. #birdie #birdielou #darlingbehomesoon #anxietyandme #saturday #crazycatlady #crazychickenlady #depressionandme #kittensofinstagram #catsofinstagram #birdieofinstagram #imissher #imissmymama #var #abdominalaorticaneurysm #shewasmyperson #shewasmybestfriend #itsoknottobeokay #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealth https://www.instagram.com/p/B2HUjY8DCMh/?igshid=1fxrfbfgmmzlg

[melissaartichokey]

This past full moon 🌝 in Aquarius was all about perspective & RELEASE for me. Perspective & release of misunderstandings that I’ve been holding onto for way too long. . . Yesterday i had a deep & real conversation with my mom, that i now realize we needed, to move forward to be our greater and higher selves. The older i get, the more i learn the hardships of being a parent. So this message I’m sharing, is for people who are holding on to emotions from childhood involving their parent’s parenting: Know that you chose the parents you have in this life for a reason. If not you, then God/your higher power. They were chosen, to help you learn lessons that your soul needs. Parents are not perfect, they’re human- But they do what they can, when they can, with the resources they’ve been given. So be gentle. Love them. Be grateful. Forgive them. Befriend them. Try to understand them. They love you no matter what and guide you the only way they know how. I can’t imagine what my parents went through in this life for me, but I’m grateful for the person i am because of them. . . Mama, i love you. I miss you. And i am SO much like you.. independent, strong, and i go after what i want regardless of anyone else’s opinion. Thank you for showing me what it is to be brave and courageous. I can only hope that one day I’ll get to teach my children how to be like that as well. I can’t wait to see you & hug you ❤️ #igetitfrommymama #imissmymama #healing #gratitude #spiritualawakening #spiritualawakeningisreal https://www.instagram.com/p/B1O9ZTaHevJ/?igshid=14g4li84dx4vh

[tonee-boboni]

Zoe, my new roommate loves to watch (and bark at!) the birds all day.. #dogsitting #shitzu #imissmymama (at North Tustin, California) https://www.instagram.com/toneegirl05/p/Bujp9Qkh_1MOqFHBftxpgvdAyJmCLrNq0gJfGc0/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1edfdoqk5t2l9

[tinatamale]

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Tina Tamale Ramos (@tinatamale)

The sky was overcast, the leaves a rich shade of green, the wind blew & conducted a symphony of sounds by touching every chime. It was beautiful, like the soundtrack of a dream. I stood there, looking up to the heavens. It made me think of my mama. Wind Chime (after "Dream") #PierreHuyghe #Minneapolis #walkermuseum #imissmymama #mnisforprincelovers2018 #ExploreMinnasota #adventuresoftinatamale (at Minneapolis Sculpture Garden) https://www.instagram.com/p/BnSdOkJl2Gd/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1tulsk5z7345y

[eranfoye]

Back to the grind, the morn. #happymonday #Imissmymama

[everythingshaquana]

THIS is what I fight for!!! The RIGHT to be Black, Bold AND Beautiful! The RIGHT to Black AND in Love! The RIGHT to OWN Black Love on MY terms! • • Whether you know it, Love begins at Home! And Home is where the Heart is! My Heart has ALWAYS BEEN and ALWAYS will be with my momma! And the same is true for Princess K!! Can't you tell?! • • THIS is what 4 generations of Black Love looks like in one picture (with me taking the photo and Momma up in Heaven sending her smiles down to us ❤️)! Tell me, can YOU feel the Love?!?! A'se!! • • • #EverythingShaquana #MotivationalMonday #MyWorld #MyMomma #MyBabyGirl #GrandmaAndMe #CancersAndCapricorns #OnlyTheyGetIt #LOL #IMissMyMamas #PrincessK #BeautifulBrownBabyDoll #MyMoonlightBaby #MyRainbowBaby #Laughter #Smiles #Joy #BlackLove #AllInOnePic #BlackGirlMagic #MelaninPoppin #BrownSkinBeauty #IGetItFromMyMomma #SheGetItFromHerMomma #CantYouTell #MakeBlackLoveLegal #BlackLivesMatter #Love #Light #Live

[peachy-queen]

My mama's smothered pork chops were the stuff of heavenly goodness, especially the gravy. The best (and most hilarious) memory of her making it was when she and the woman-child used to park the loaf of bread on the countertop and proceed with "cleaning" the remnants of the gravy from the skillet before washing it. 😂😂🤣🤣🙄🤦🏽‍♀ #happymemories #imissmymama #homecookedmeals #mamasbestdinners https://www.instagram.com/p/CE2sK-jDWFCN8-O_60DoK8c1WdTei5ciOeYnPU0/?igshid=kzyt4ogb2p2u

[smafirm]

Time will never heal this wound... #EarnestineLovedMe #iLovedEarnestine #iMissMyMama

[melissaartichokey]

All I want, is to hug my mom 😭😣. . . Weenies cuddles will have to do for now💚 She always sits on my chest for a few minutes every day when i get home from work.. but as soon as i pick up my phone to take a picture, she’s out! Today she stayed while i cried my eyes out missing my mom, and even let me take a picture ✨😻 she loves me 😊 #imissmymama #healing #gratitude #spiritualawakening #spiritualawakeningisreal #weenies #catsofinstagram https://www.instagram.com/p/B1NGJSRn0TV/?igshid=j8t0ywnrxqu1