#in s1 when jesse asks to talk about what happened and says ‘it’s not like we can talk to anyone else’ i just. shuddered… my poor sweet lamb

[pinkmandias]

i was sifting through a bunch of jesse hate (for an edit not bc i’m obsessed😭) and the gist of what i got was just. a willful misunderstanding of his character, his trauma, and his naivety/innocence in regards to his age/the power imbalance present within his relationship with walt and like. almost everyone else on the show.

obviously all of the people that loathe him and have paragraphs upon paragraphs of misinterpretations & simplifications of his arc to spew online are all people that love & identify with walter (surprise surprise), but i feel like it’s also so very reminiscent of the shit i noticed these last two years with certain media where a large portion of audience is both too stupid to recognize nuances present in writing & leans heavily on their confirmation bias.

and on that note, what was not shocking to me was how many of these complaints could be boiled down to him getting in walt’s way, making things more difficult for walt, or subverting walt’s authority. it’s incredibly similar to the hatred for skyler that has only recently begun to taper off (or at least take different forms or been redirected to other characters - like jane). jesse shares significantly more similarities with female characters in brba than any male character, and i think it’s only because he is not a woman (whereas skyler is) that jesse hate was not more prevalent while the show was airing/i see more of it now than ever.

jesse is a pussy, he’s a little bitch, he’s weak, he cries too much - because it’s not “manly” for him to feel remorse and to be destroyed by guilt. when he self destructs it’s selfish and when he lashes out he’s ungrateful. never mind the fact that he has been through more than enough to deeply traumatize even the most well adjusted individual by s3, much less at the end of his captivity by s5. with no one to turn to, no one to talk to, no one to comfort him. he’s neglected time and time again by the man who, from the very beginning, violated & disrespected his boundaries, his belongings, his personal life, his home, his time & has (both intentionally and unintentionally) methodically chipped away at any meaningful relationship jesse had or could have & left him with nothing but Him, nurturing a deadly codependency. he has at least two members of walt’s family being projected onto him as well as the role of a student & business partner. perfect obedience & perfect fulfillment of these roles is expected, but not praised.

would you not also be a little bitchy sometimes? do impulsive & risky things to gain attention or love or some semblance of power in your otherwise powerless life? would you not fall prey to fleeting affection given by a dying man (with the same sickness as your late aunt that you shared a home with and loved so dearly that you spent her remaining time on this earth by her side, taking care of her) when that affection is so heady? when you have nothing and no one else??

it always circles back around to “he knew what he was getting into”, “he deserved xyz”, “he could have stopped at any time”, and “why didn’t he just leave” - just like with skyler. i don’t think i have to explain why those comments are so disturbing & i don’t think it’s difficult at all to understand why he cries or bitches so much…

anyway, i’ll conclude this post with these quotes because i think it says a lot that the only character vince remembers the audience hating so much is skyler -

[romeulusroy]

Being Sam's Twin With Your Own Abilities Would Include:

A/N: Based off this imagine :) I really liked the idea and wanted to write more! Contains s1/s2 spoilers! Just writing to write lol I missed it and I'm having fun 💜

Being twins, you and Sammy were always close

Everyone who saw you asked if you were identical. Clearly you weren't, but people asked stupid questions when it came to twins

John had not one to blame, but two, each of you paying in your own way. He could be mean when he wanted, and after it happened, you'd find one another, not really talking about it, just looking for company

"You think all Dads say these things?"

"I don't know, I really don't know."

You and Sam formed your own babble baby language that freaked both John and Sam out. You'd laugh and laugh and it wouldn't make any sense but to the both of you

You don't remember the language, but you two still crack each other up and share these knowing looks that no one else can decipher. You can bicker and yell and laugh and joke just with your eyes

The two of you lived in Dean's hand-me-downs. Sam hated it, but you never minded. Everything was already worn and comfortable. Plus it made you feel special, like you were cool like your big brother

Yelling at you, Dean and John would get your names mixed up and that would just make them angrier

You and Sam would comfort one another when you were scared, hiding under the blankets with a flashlight

Sam learned to read first, he always so smart, so at night he'd read to you what he could so you could sleep. Sometimes he had a real book, other times he'd read the back of a cereal box or (on extremely rare occasion it wasn't glued to his side) he'd read from your fathers journal

"Sammy?"

"Yeah?"

"Can you read to me?"

He never got frustrated or upset, not even when you learned how to read by yourself. There was just something so soothing about his voice

Dean made each of you hold his hands when you were leaving the motel in the middle of the night or crossing the street. He really felt like a dad with too much on his plate, trying to round up the both of you

You both excelled in school

Your father wasn't too worried about that. You made him proud if you could shoot straight and fight off an attacker, whatever the species, not if you got an A+ on a paper or test

You knew this from the beginning, but that didn't mean it didn't hurt. You hated seeing the look on Sam's face when he shoved his good grade into his backpack

Learning different languages together. At first, just Latin, but then a little Spanish, French, Russian, sign language, etc. It was like having your own language again, one neither John nor Dean could figure out

"Stop doing that, you two."

"Doing what?"

"English. We speak English in this house."

Neither you nor Sam wanted to be hunters. You were good at it, sure, but you wanted more for your life. You wanted to go to college and parties and go on real dates and be normal people

Together, you applied to universities, both getting into Stanford

When Sam had that big fight with John, you left too. You would always defend Sam. That night, you got in John's face, and you yelled. Screamed. It was brutal. He'd never admit it, but it broke Dean. It had always been the three of you. Now he was alone

You and Sam clung together those first few weeks of the semester

Being around all those strangers, having the upbringing that you did, it made you feel like a freak. Eventually you learned what to say, how to be, and you found your place

You were the Winchester Twins to anyone who knew you. Neither of you minded that title

You met Jessica when they first started dating and instantly loved her. The flings you dated were nothing, but Jess really meant something to Sam, so she did to you, too. Eventually, when he decided, you were the first person he talked to about getting engaged to her. You were ecstatic. You really wished your mom was here to see just how great Sam turned out

Sam doesn't tell you about his nightmares, but you can always tell when something is off. He looks tired. Jumpy. You wish, later on, that you had brought it up

Dean goes to you before he goes to Sam, knowing if you say yes, he will too

Initially, you aren't scared or worried, but the more your brother talks, the more fear you see in him

"Y/n, you're really falling for this?"

"Sam, il est vraiment inquiet. Et si papa est blessé ou mort ?"

"Tu ne peux pas être sérieux. C'est de papa dont nous parlons."

"English!"

Eventually he agrees

You hadn't noticed it back then, but your abilities were appearing, too

You didn't know they were dead, though. Sometimes, you couldn't tell. The newly dead had a way of seeming alive. The longer it's been, the worse their injuries seemed to get

There were no signs. A group of women, all dressed up with bridesmaids banners around them. One dressed in white with a tiara. It was the middle of the day, in the middle of campus, but they all seemed drunk. Still, you didn't question it. The night before, all five of them were on the news. Drunk driving accident, no survivors

You barely gave it a second thought

Like old times, you and Sam fight over whose going to sit in the front seat

You and Sam get pulled back into the lives you left behind. It's nice seeing Dean again, listening to the music your father used to play, etc.

When Dean drops you two back at school, you go your separate ways. All you want to do it take a shower and wash the past few days away

It's not until you see the fire do you run back outside

You run into Jess, though, on the lawn of the house you're staying at. She's freezing, in nothing but her pajamas. You tell her to wait there, knowing Sam would give her his coat if you asked

When you get to him, though, he looks sick. Petrified. Dean tells you the news. Jess was dead, the same way as your mom. You almost object, but when you look back to where you left her, she isn't there

You don't bring it up, not then, not for a while

You try to be there for Sam, but he reteats into himself. He has nightmares, he's antsy, angry. You're not sure how to help, what to say, so you let him feel what he has to feel

Strange things keep happening, especially when you're close to your mothers killer, but you don't say a word

Missouri is the only person who knows, and she's very secretive about it. She tells you not to be afraid of them, to welcome them and your abilities

You want to ask her what it means, but Dean interrupts the conversation

When you and Sam bring Dean to see the healer, you accidentally talk to some of his victims. You warn them that it's not safe for them to be there. They look so sad when you say this, not realizing it was too late for them

After John dies, you run into him in the hallway. You thank God that Dean's okay, telling him he's fine, he's going to be fine. John just stares at you. He opens his mouth to speak, but Sam calls you instead. When you look back, he's gone. You find out he died just a few minutes ago

You don't talk about John with either of your brothers. Dean is angry, and Sam feels guilty for fighting with him, but you just feel crazy. Insane. You truly feel like you're losing it

The more visions Sam has, the more people you see. The worse they get. You visit a few of the people like you, but it isn't until after you encounter Andy and Webber do things start to get scary

Dean basically interrogates you about seeing the future or mind control or whatever it is that you might be able to do given that Andy and Webber had abilities (and were twins) just like you and Sammy

You insisted nothing was happening, you didn't have anything special about you. You knew neither were fooled, but Sam made Dean let it go, for your sake

Still you catch them looking at you strangely every so often, especially when you suspect you've seen another dead person

On the way back from a hunt, you stop at a motel where everything that could go wrong does go wrong

Enter this imagine :)

It takes a lot of coaxing, but eventually, you let Sam in as long as he doesn't turn on the light. You can't bear to look at the hanging man

It all comes out whether you want it to or not

Seeing Jess the night of the fire, and John, and your mom, and all those other people. It was horrible. You couldn't make sense of them. Some were victims, homicides and suicides, some were from your hunts, but others just seemed to be regular people who died

Sam feels so guilty that you couldn't come to him about this, that you had kept such a huge secret from him

Dean is angry. He can't protect you from what he can't see. How can he put a stop to this when he doesn't even know what it is?

They make you promise that when you see something, you tell them. You tell them only when you can't hide your fear or discomfort

Dean cringes every time, especially when they're next to you in the car or at your bedside when you go to sleep/wake up

"Dean?"

"Yeah?"

"They're back."

"Which one?"

"The man with no eyes."

Sam reads to you when you go to sleep, when they're standing over you

These days it's Wikipedia pages about your latest hunt or things he finds in odd corners of the internet about being able to see the dead. He's constantly looking for more information about you and him

Thankfully the power seems to go away when Sammy's does, but you know long before he's going to get one of his visions or dreams. They always stand outside the windows and wait and watch

[chubbletea]

I AM ASKING YOU LOUDLY ABOUT MCSM THIS DAY ARIA AU. TELL ME EVERYTHING INFODUMP RIGHT NOW

OKAY OAK AY OPAKAY OAK YUSDGSAIUFHGVKHSVDBS DVHJFXVKS

AHHSHR HYGT TYSM FIOR ASKUNG I AM SO EXCITED TO TELL YOU ABT THIS

SO

I am currently rewatching s2 (abt halfway through s2e1) and rewatched a canterlot wedding yesterday so these things are likely to change abt this (I will reblog this post with it later!)

iyk the plot of a canterlot wedding, you can pretty much guess where this is going. but still, there are some differences

some time between s1 and s2, petra goes to lukas (her cousin) and shows him the ring and tells him that she plans on proposing to jesse. lukas is very supportive of her decision and encourages her to do it. she ends up proposing to them at endercon! (I imagine beacontown's not that far from endercon). obv, jesse says yes! they are now engaged :]

the days go on like they normally would (for the most part) until the start of s2. I'm thinking maybe instead of the town preparing for founder's day, they're preparing for the wedding (I imagine it's in the order hall!)

when romeo transforms into jesse at the end of s2e3, he has NO FUCKIN CLUE that jesse is supposed to be getting married in like. a week at most. he finds out by petra coming up to him and talking abt it, much to his confusion

now, ofc, jesse is down in prison with radar (and jack?) and VERY MUCH MISSES THEIR FIANCEE. they know they're supposed to be getting married soon and is very nervous abt it bc they don't know what happened to petra!! and hopes she's okay!!!! generally worried abt the wedding and what could happen and if they will even have one at all :(

petra eventually catches on to quote unquote "jesse" not being themselves. in their panic, "jesse" brainwashes petra, similar to how chrysalis did to shining armor in the episode, which turns her eyes a similar color to romeo's, but duller.

the wedding plan goes on. jesse is miserable, radar is slightly less miserable, petra is brainwashed. but where is everyone else in all this? lukas is the main person who goes "HEY WTF?", so he kinda plays twilight in this case, but no one rlly does anything abt it bc they're just like "eh I think they're stressed", which would be understandable in this case tbh

eventually lukas tries to confront "jesse", and obv, this goes poorly. I don't have an exact idea on how it all plays out, but it ends with lukas crying bc He Fucked Up and "jesse" pretending to comfort him, he apologizes, and he sends his ass to the Shadow Realm (sunshine institute)

after a while of searching hopelessly for a way out, he comes across the real jesse (and radar). he tackles jesse, despite their protests, thinking they're still the fake, so jesse has to convince him that they're the real jesse, so they bring up the time where they gave him their cookie in the dirt hut wayy back in s1e1, and he's like "HOLY SHIT! I'M SO HAPPY TO SEE YOU" and they hug and radar's like "aww" and then they move on (again, a reference to a canterlot wedding)

they find a way to escape, yadda yadda yadda (THIS DAY IS GOING TO BE PERFECTT /lyr), and just as "jesse" and petra are gonna get married, lukas, radar, and the real jesse bust in and stop the wedding DRAMATICALLY.

then I imagine it plays out similarly to how the episodes actually went and they defeat romeo (like I mentioned earlier, haven't seen s2 in a hot second, SOO). petra's brainwashing is removed (somehow. still figuring that one out), and then jesse and petra can get married! yayy!!

oh btw I did make wedding outfit concepts for jesse and petra! here they are;

found all the stuff on pinterest. I also made "jesse" and brainwashed petra in pt;

and! here are the wedding roles I have planned;

radar- officiant

ivor- ring bearer

jack- bride's (petra's) escort

lukas- petra's best man

axel & olivia- jesse's best man & maid of honor respectively (it's a non-traditional wedding I can do what I want)

like I said, I imagine the wedding takes place in the order hall, and I may write some vows at some point, but that's basically it. I have some vague ideas on what wedding photos, the cake, the reception, etc. look like, but yk. I'll get there

so. YEAH. that's my tda!mcsm au. FEEL FREE TO SHOOT ME ANOTHER ASK IF YOU WANNA KNOW MORE PLS PLS PLS PLSSSS

[shrinkthisviolet]

⭐⭐⭐

…well I had an answer all written out, and then Tumblr erased it 💀 because no autosave for asks, I keep forgetting. Take two:

Gonna go with the Childhood Friends AU for this one! (EDIT 1/27/24: it has its own series now, so I’ve updated with the series link!)

So I gotta be honest, this started as kind of a joke/offhand comment. I sent this post to a friend and said “BARRY & MORGAN omg somewhere out there is an AU where they met earlier” or something, and they ofc replied with the Eyes (you know: 👀) and “I will patiently await for when you have more to say,” so like. What else was I supposed to do. Ofc I had to find a way 😂

It was just meant to be a concept—a snippet, or a few bullet points. Guess what it turned out to be? A FULL, SPRAWLING OUTLINE

(Ofc it did 😂 that’s the way of things, right?)

Quick rundown/elevator pitch: Barry knows Morgan (who is, in the intro fic and part of the next fic, called “Jesse” since that’s her legal and preferred name until Eowells) from basically her infancy. Her fetushood, really. This is because Harritess moved to Central City at Tina’s urging, met real-estate-agent Nora Allen (this is her canon occupation, believe it or not), settled down in Central, and then remained friends with Nora and her husband, Henry.

Barry took some time to come around to baby Jesse Morgan, a little jealous of this new baby in his house who wasn’t even related to him…but ofc it only took a little time holding her and being present with her to declare himself her big brother 💞 much to the delight and amusement of the adults (and Iris ofc).

Sadly, they’re separated when Nora Allen dies—Tina takes Morgan while her parents’ fates are uncertain, and Barry ofc goes to live with Joe. He later finds out from Joe that her dad is alive and her mom is dead…and Eowells apparently has no interest in reuniting Barry and Morgan. Eowells in particular was apparently quite annoyed by Joe’s questions and suggested that he should “focus on your own family situation, Detective, instead of involving yourself in mine.”

Barry’s crushed by this. He was already blaming himself for the accident that possibly killed Morgan’s parents, considering he encouraged them to go on that honeymoon beach trip during which the accident happened, now he knows it killed her mom and hardened her dad…no matter how much Joe and Iris insist it isn’t his fault, Barry won’t hear of it. Though he can tell Joe’s tired of hearing about it some months later, so…Iris is really the only one who hears about Barry’s guilt following him into his dreams. Specifically into a particular one that Iris finds quite interesting…but more about that in the CF AU reunion fic 😉

This AU is gonna cover pre-canon, s1, and s2, though s2 will probably not be too canon-divergent? I’m mostly including it because a few minor things about it will be amplified in interesting ways…but really, s1 is where the major divergences happen (Iris is looped in sooner, Barry and Eowells start off on a bad note, Barry and Tina are a united front by the time s1 starts, etc). We’re still in pre-canon for a while, though, so that’s not anytime soon 😅

ask for the director's commentary on a certain story, or send a ⭐️star⭐️ for me to choose something to talk about!

Taglist (send an ask or DM to be added or removed):

@ocappreciationtag @arrthurpendragon @vexic929 @raith-way @thechaoticfanartist @ironverseocs @goldheartedchaoticdisaster

[panicataphmausinsanity]

aaron rant

ok this is a rant no one asked for but i just wanna put all of my disorganized thoughts out there about aaron and the man my dude could've become without jesson's horrible execution. my grammar may be off and im not a good analyzer or anything, this is just a rant that i wanna get off my chest.

disclaimer :: i haven't watched MCD and i do plan to, and i'm aware of some things that happen but if you wanna share your opinion on anything id rather anyone would keep the reblogs spoil free

lemme start by saying that i love aaron. i genuinely love his character so damn much but NOT his canon. i love the IDEA of aaron and not his execution. jessica and jason did such a bad job portraying him- dont get me wrong i am not bashing them for the foundation they've laid for most of their wonderful characters it's the portrayal of them that gets me so ENRAGED. all of jess's characters have at least some thing going wrong with them and it's genuinely fucking insane. i don't mean what they go through in the series- as in who they ARE. what the fuck is a kawaii~chan? like god. i think so many characters in the series deserved so SO much more, especially aaron.

starting off with pdh s1 aaron. - i don't necessarily loathe pdh s1 aaron. i mean in here, he seems to have a personality than he ever does in season one of mys which is an upgrade i guess? a main problem imo was how his character always revolved around aphmau. i'm not even gonna choose to comment on the horrid age gap jesson's implemented in aarmau's story. i just hate that aaron himself didn't really have any other friend than aphmau and the fact that after they met, the series just continued to revolve around them.. and not them individually either- them as a relationship.

i think seeing certain instances like how aaron became lily's friend and stuff would've been important because technically, wasn't lily aaron's first friend in pdh? how is that just glossed over considering the fact that aaron pushed everyone who tried to interact with him off his back? isn't it interesting how lily managed to get a hold of him and actually became a friend? i don't understand why that was never shown because while students were scared of the dude because of all the rumors and shit going around, some kids like jeoffery actively reached out to him like we see in the ep where aaron asks aph to prom. he never relented to jfry's attempts to be friends w him and through this a girl like lily managed to be friends with him. i feel like something like this shoudlve been shown. i wouldve also liked to see a stronger reaction to him over lily and ivy's scheme. aaron obviously considered lily a caring friend and when he understood that they were scheming from what i remember, when he saw lily after learning about everything all he did was go "if ur gonna treat aph like this we're better off not being friends" or smt?? i think from what we understand about aaron over the series, emotional connections are obviously something he cherishes very much. so seeing him kinda like- brush the whole thing off and not be lily's friend feels so anticlimactic. idk how to phrase it. i know this was premature aaron and the aaron we know over the series is grown up and everything, but i still do feel like aaron would've had a stronger reaction to the scheme.

prob 2 was how after aaron and aph came to know ab each other being shu n fc, aaron didn't become full fledged friends with like ANYONE other than her. this felt extremely weird to me. we see him go to this dinner sylvanna planned and we see him socially thriving there- him cracking jokes and everyone having a fun time around him, travis and garroth wheezing over his jokes- how did this dude not become friends with them? i feel like they (garroth & travis) would've talked to aaron more and become more than acquaintances w him. a lil bonding thing if you get me?? mainly garroth. it's just weird that garroth never became a friend of aaron's imo. they were put in situations where they could've easily become friends. i know that garroth was jealous about aaron coming outta nowhere and swooping aph off of her feet, but he clearly got over it (during the time of s1 anyway, after that he went batshit crazy). they must've had one on one interactions during the dinner or prom right??????/ like come on. it's just weird!! this brings me to the fact that i literally don't see aaron making proper friends other than aph until fcu. like- aph is his only friend ever ykwim?? i feel like im phrasing this in such a dumb way- but it's just frustrating to see his entire social life just being- aph for a while. i just think garroth and aaron could have become friends as well, maybe even travis. and during prom, maybe even kaitlyn. we see aaron also being pretty mature and giving actual, promising advice to aph during the music room scenes. from this i feel like at some point aaron could have also comforted kaitlyn and maybe a friendship could've bloomed out of this??? this thought's just been sitting in my mind. aaron COULD have had a friend other than just aph. it just feels like his whole world revolves around aph and aph only until his family issues and the ultima bullshit comes around.

now in mystr s1, aaron is so FUCKING BLAND AND STALE AND UUUGHGHHHHHHH its actually so fuckin funny because mystreet season one aaron is relatively decent compared to his other versions *cough s5 cough. i actually do like s1 aaron's character. he's the epitome of chill- laid back, honest, communicative and supportive. he's a great friend to aph during her times of need, and during s1 he's the sanest character on the show.

but that's it. all he was was this friend to aphmau until the dumbass play arc during which they decide to go for something romantic. like his whole identity revolved around walking shirtless, being a chick magnet and a friend to aph. he revolved around aphmau, much like his pdh s1 self and that pisses me off so much!! he had no fucking personality other than being supportive to aph for a while. around the end you see him start to gain *something* similar to a personality, and while it was less than pleasant it was better than whatever the fuck was going on while he was only a friend to aph. it's also disappointing seeing him practically only gain emotions after developing a romantic relationship with aphmau. even during this, his interactions are limited to aph and zane most of the times, and even then he doesn't develop an outward friendship with zane- which would've been fucking amazing!!!! while they do start to bond, it's still like aphmau is the only one keeping them glued together while it would've been real cool for aaron to develop a friendship with zane and interactions w him that doesn't solely have to do with aphmau all the time. the fact that aph's brought him out of his shell is cool, but he's still ONLY friends with aph which is VERY eh. he may be considered friends w zane and stuff, but we only see major bonding stuff going on when it's between aaron and aph, but we don't see it with the other characters. it's jsut weird because everyone's known each other for so long, aaron;s bound to have grown closer w someone at the least- for example, garroth or travis. we've seen the unlikely group form during that one episode- aaron, aph, zane and travis- where they have a stupid lil immature game thing or whatever. i feel like travis and zane and aaron could've collectively bonded and it would've been super cute!! plus aph nudging him and zane to be more social as well- a lil detour to fcu where we see aaron trying his best to get out there and make friends w/ aph's adorable support- he has the perfect opportunity to do it during moments like these but it never becomes more than just what seem like forced interactions. like UGH. UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. so. much. potentialll!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! just gone. poof. a strong friendship between aaron and the ro'maeve brothers wouldve been so fucking ack. sfryquoeuiwhiblforhgubhjfwe. litera;;y/. now i wpuldve loved to see tht1!!!! it's also just so weird that we see a drastic change in aaron's character from fcu to myst, in fcu he's so shy and he's trying his best to be friends w others and he succeeds little by little (we never hear of these friends again but ok.) and then in ms we see him as this super chill dude w hot gains sigma male or whatever and his only friend is aph. he was so much more expressive during fcu and while many events occurred in between, it's just weird seeing him not get out there more during s1 esp considering the fact that he has more freedom to. ill mention this later. anyway-----

one thing i liked to see was aaron break out of his cool character during the spectacle of zanemau, another stupid attempt by jess to get another boy to get infatuated with aph which thankfully did not happen.. kind of. id love to see people talk about how zane just heavily depended on aph as an emotional support system and was just afraid aaron would take aph away from him, a feeling of abandonment rising out of his own self loathing yada yada. . while zanemau is a cool ship, this whole thing was jsut extreenmly forced-it was obvious it was just to get another guy to fawn over aph. i hate aph's harem. i'll get off topic if i talk about how every single boy within a 50 mile radius of aph falls head over heels in love with her, but anyhoo. i did get off topic.. . . . so aaron breaking his character was like this breath of fresh air for me. when he's in the resto's bathroom, talking to the mirror ab his frustrations ab aph going all flushed and orgasmy over zane bc of the love ption that he wasnt aware of and how he should stop whats going on bc of zianna (fucking hate her ass), he seemed like an actual person lmao. i love that scene alot because he wasn't just this cool chill flirt(for aph), his feelings finally poured out in some way. it made him a full fledged character (for a little..). then garroth came in and talked to him and whatbnit (another wasted opportunity to grow closer maybe??????? idk) and they went back to the table . i havent talked ab how much i loathe this whole zuzu aph arc though like oh my god it mustve been incredibly uncomfortable for aph and aaron sitting through all that. i hate zianna so much and it was also mega annoying of vylad and the brothers to drag them into this bc he couldnt say no to his mommy. it was genuinely weird and so many things in the show are brushed off as comedic relief- things borderline crazy and worthy of restraining orders and jail. literally. literal kids watch these and may think it's normal bhvr when it isnt. but anyway.

i know that mystreet s1 was a spin off of mcd that just blew up and multiplied into other seasons and as it doubled prequels like pdh and fcu came to life. im very much aware of the fact that jess just developed the characters in their modern steads as the story progressed because it wasnt done something beforehand- mystreet happened to be a happy accident and jess didn't plan the characters out beforehand, including the plot (horribly evident from the shit that started from s4). they developed as characters in stages as the stories went on and that's just painfully obvious, especially when we watch the series in the timeline jess posted it. we see how aaron goes from the stoic chill hot sigma male to this uwu boy personality, which was what jess wanted him as in the end ig? it's obviously very weird though. imo, my opinion, she shouldve kept aaron's laid back personality. through this we could see him gradually grow and insert himself into aph's friend grp as well. we see that happen during s2 and s3 of ms, where he does progress in terms of social interactions- hes seen to be cracking jokes outwardly, he even has his own lil comedic relief spiels, becomes good buds with dante and stuff (which went just as it came from what i remember :[[[) and in s3 he becomes much cooler and is more involved within the friend group. he also seemed to be like this in pdh, like during the dinner as i mentioned before.

during fcu, this just. changes. his character is very... emotional? i dont really know how to put it. it's out of character. he's incredibly shy and relies on aph as a social plug. while in pdh he seemed to be less awkward w social interactions, aaron was 100x times more awkward during fcu. he seemed overly sensitive, and at moments its like he needed to be coddled. i did love it when aph helped him grow more socially, but we see that in ms 1 he has no friends. he's like this hot lone wolf (..), a drastic contrast to what he wanted to be in fcu imo (i believe this because derek was off his back now and he had the freedom to do have more friends and emotional connections like these is what he desperately craved- it's something so evident.) he wanted to have more friends and be more social. while this does happen in fcu, in ms1 we don't really see the results coming into place. like he becomes much more bold- in fcu he used to flush and blush at just hearing aph's heartbeat and in ms1, that one instance where aaron gets picked to play romeo and aph is like "you do realise we gotta kiss?" he just goes "yeah." in the most casual way ever- like it's just another tuesday for him or somethin. it's just a weird ass change. his character fluctuates when we watch the show in the chronological order and it's jsut so out of place and while i know it's no fault to jess ( i mean it is but part of it is justified ) it's still incredibly weird. jess could have prevented this by just keeping him as the character she initially started with.

and his last form- season 5. starlight. god fuck- this aaron was such a fucking baby. if fcu aaron wanted to be coddled, starlight aaron straight up wanted milk from aph's bosoms. he becomes this uwu soft boi- and considering all of the events that unfolded, it's still weird. yes, many things happened during their time at the lodge but it's just so fucking weird!!!!! i don't even know what to make of it. i just hated his character in s5. he stuttered every 3 fucking seconds. jason voice acted him so bad like oh my god im so sorry but it was literally unbearable. rewatching starlight was fucking horrifying. the stupid ass dips in the voice- god fuck!!! im so sorry its just what i think but i really hated how jason voice acted aaron during s5. i liked the fact that he was more expressive but he just changed completely- and i liked the small part where he felt like everyone wanted him to be something different now that he was out as a werewolf, but he really did fucking change and it did not feel like he was aaron at all. it felt like seeing a 12 year old find out about age regression and implement it onto a character like aaron's. it felt childish and just weird. jess couldve done way better with aaron during s5.

this shit was long and i feel liek i still have a lot more to say and when i rememebr ill jsut edit it on. no ones probably gonna reach the end of this but if you did, idk how u got so much time reading all this but i lpve you

( i love this picture so much <3 )

[emmafallsinlove]

Opinion on the Max/Lorelai fiasco?

the fact i've answered it in depth in the morning but tumblr didn't published it.... anyways. i just think it was very immature relationship on both sides. it was clear (at least to me) that lorelai never dated before and that max is intrigued by her but nothing else. like, i don't know it was very weird from the start like on episode 4 of s1 if iirc where rory is aren't allowed to do the test she study for a week so in the end of the episode he leaves a voicemail like "and rory, if your mom is listening" very very immature and even unprofessional. like it just didn't aged well but it's was a very wrong thing to do anywyas. and i just hate how max kind of forcing lorelai to be in a relationship with him in a way when she wants to break up with him and has intentions of bringing him back the book he gave her, max is like "rory would be fine" but lorelai was right. now rory, a 16 years old kid, is involved in whatever happen between them. i just think max didn't fully grasp the fact that he is walking into a family, assuming rory would be fine & okay no matter what, and that's the thing - boundaries were crossed because no one was matured enough to talk through stuff. max asking rory about her break up with dean, lorelai joking around max should let rory A+ on the test because her essay is so good (and i'm sure it was, it just wrong to do anything of the sort), max proposing to lorelai out of fear of losing her or being jealous or something i don't know, lorelai never lets him be part of their life because she's not ready yet, he yells at her telling her she's only cares about herself because she didn't gave him the keys to the house but honestly? she wasn't ready, she didn't wanted him there. she woke up her 16 years old daughter freaking out about having a man in the house, about their life might change completely and how nothing is gonna come back to the way it was it just. and they never talk anything through as well. where's max is gonna live? where's rory? is lorelai who brings up this questions in season 2 because they are a family and she is always gonna put rory first. that's why luke was the best match for her because he put rory first before anything else. he was rory's father before he was lorelai's boyfriend and later husband. lorelai saw how much luke loves rory that he is willingly going to drive up to yale and not let her quit school while max reaction would've been "rory would be okay" same as christopher's reactions at times. but lorelai never told her what's part he is gonna take in their life as well. when he pointed out it's past 23:00 and rory and dean are still out lorelai is like "well, you don't say anything to my daughter. she is my daughter." and you can't build a family like that, a relationship with this attitude. also the fact that max's parents were excited for him to get married but neither emily and richard or lorelai and rory never meet them? big red flag to me. it's not even "right person wrong time" because it isn't even that. like regarding to the plot of s2 with jess i think it could've been very interesting if max would've stayed around a few more episodes but i think it was good that he was gone when he did. lorelai wasn't ready and he wasn't ready and it showed.

Send me a ship and I’ll give you my brutally honest opinion on it

[theangiediary]

Thinking about this post by @accidentalwincest and...

I don't think Sam really conceptualized how dangerous hunting is prior to Dean's deal. I'm not saying he's dumb, I'm saying like... Dean and John protected/infantilized Sam to some degree: Dean likes using big statements "nothing bad's going to happen to you", John canonically not taking Sam on hunts as much/leaving him in the car. "I've been watching you my whole life!" Yes, but he can only see what he's allowed to. He sees the aftermath (Dean's fear, John's.. everything) more than the event (monsters). There's an element of "taking for granted" that they're going to be alright in Sam's s1 attitude, that extends past the physical and into his relationship with Dean.

I think that's why Dean comes across as more desperate early on, because he loves Sam but he "knows" the normal life is safer, so he can't ask Sam not to leave him (I mean he tries, Scarecrow, but then the way he talks about him to those poor diners lol). He loves John but he knows John and Sam don't get along, and when they're all together, Sam gets hurt emotionally and Dean is shoved aside as "daddy's little solider".

Dean canonically cannot live with Sam dead/in danger (Croatoan my fucking beloved), which is how he accepted Sam going to college (safe) but freaked out when he ran away as a kid (unsafe), and keeps pushing Sam to go "normal" after his death in s3. Again, Stanford is why Dean thinks Sam can, since he's left Dean in danger/dead before (he could have very easily died on a hunt and Sam wouldn't have known), and in Dean's 0 self worth state of mind, nothing's changed. I think... I think Dean underestimates the impact of Jess's murder, honestly. I think that was the first time Sam had someone he loved ripped from him since he was too young to remember Mary (Amy is a much later addition I'm ignoring here). It takes her death to get him angry, and John's to bring it "home" in a sense, so when Dean is on the block... yeah. Finally that "you're my brother and I'd die for you, but..." attitude becomes "your my brother and I'm going to kill anything that threatens to take you away".

[helbertinelli]

You asked me this a while back regarding Brittana so I wanted to ask you a similar thing about Finchel - if Finn and Rachel had to date other people in seasons 1, 2 , and 4 for a while before getting together is there anyone in canon or an idea for an OC you could see them being with? In a universe where Fuinn/F*nntana never happened and Rachel didn’t have a fling with Jesse Brody or Puck I mean. I know Finchel are your OTP for Glee and it’s hard to imagine them with anyone else but just curious (especially in Finn’s case).

Rachel:

In S1B, I could see Rachel with Mike. He's the kinda guy who would treat Rachel right. Whenever Rachel didn't date Finn, she always went for this theater kid asshole-types... and that's just not who Rachel would go for. Rachel would date a nice, tall jock. That's her type. So if she can't be with Finn, Mike Chang is the next obvious choice. Plus I wouldn't have minded if Cherry was a thing in S6 and onward since Glee decided to kill off Finn after Cory's death (just to avoid anyone asking: they could have just written him out of the show and just say Finn is alive somewhere and just say him and Rachel got married. Fast and Furious did this with Brian after Paul Walker died.). Rachel needed to end up with someone who respects her, not with the guy who always bullied her and talked her down (the audacity of Jesse to tell Rachel her performance of DROMP wasn't that great when his performances were the most under par boring things in the world. Like sure his performances were great if he was performing at Snooze Fest 2009).

I think in S2, Rachel should have been single and focused on her singing/career/whatever like she kept saying she would in Silly Love Songs. She really didn't need to date, nor was she ready to get over Finn. So the whole plot with her dating during Prom and for another episode after that was really dumb and unnecessary.

I'd pair her with Mike Chang in S4 too. If Tike isn't a thing, then Cherry should be a thing. However, I think it would have been a million times better if Rachel was single this season too. Or if she were with Mike, I would have kept them kinda shallowly together. I honestly can't believe the Glee writers were like "We need a dancer with good abs to date Rachel" and their first thought wasn't Mike Chang.

Finn:

For Finn, I like that he was single in S1B. That was really good. He didn't need to date then. He got out of a horrible relationship and he needed to be single.

In S2, I would have probably paired him with another cheerleader or popular girl. Definitely not with Quinn. There was no way that Finn would have forgiven her after what she did to him in S1. But I could see him trying to go for a popular conventionally hot girl and this could have been a good plot to explore in S2. Silly Love Songs made Finn be super popular with the ladies at McKinley, so he could have picked any of them. It didn't even need to be a bad relationship, it could have been just an okay relationship. However, Finn would have been too in love with Rachel to be able to commit to the relationship and he would have ended breaking up with that girl and went back to Rachel. The plot of S2 with Finn dating another girl wasn't bad, it just needed to be another girl, not Quinn. It was out of character for him to date Quinn. So I would have given him just a random popular girlfriend. That way, Finn could have live his "I'm the popular dude, dating a popular girl" dream and realize, like he did in S2, that he doesn't want that, he just wants Rachel.

To be fair, if Tike wasn't a thing in S2 (or if they broke up for a while), I could have seen Tina and Finn as a couple. Tina is really his type: short, fiery, dark-haired diva with a great voice and a good heart.

I don't think Finn would have been able to date anyone else in S4. He realized in S2 that he only wants to be with Rachel and he was actually committed to that 100%. I liked to see him work towards Finchel in S4 (even if it led nowhere). It would have been OOC for him to date anyone in S4.

[norahastuff]

penny for your thoughts on salmondean codependency ?

Sure. Fair warning it’s long (was longer but I stopped myself.)

I think it’s complicated in a show that’s had so many different showrunners because they’ve all handled Sam and Dean’s relationship very differently. In Kripke’s era (s1-5) there was a romanticization of the bond. Sure there was a lot of in-depth exploration of how they wound up at the place they were at, spoiler alert: it was all because of John and his obsessive crusade to find the demon that killed his wife. That’s all he cared about and as a result, Sam and Dean had to be everything to each other. But Kripke had no intention of dismantling that at any point because he was (and always had been) writing a tragedy. Gamble continued that too. There was no room for anyone else in their lives and it would always just be the two of them against the world. So Cas had to go. Bobby had to go.

(Actually, it's funny because Gamble didn't intend this at the time, her plan was to kill Cas off, but by Edlund creating the masterpiece that is The Man Who Would Be King, he not only saved Cas from being seen as a villain, but he also deepened Dean and Cas' relationship in such a profound way and inextricably linked the two of them emotionally. And since Cas was eventually brought back, that laid the foundation for a lot of what their relationship would become.)

Up until this point, there hadn’t really been any significant dismantling of perhaps the more unhealthy parts of Sam and Dean’s relationship. Enter Carver. He stripped things down and started to explore what drove these characters. What they wanted and why they couldn’t have it. It starts with Dean being mad at Sam for not looking for him in purgatory, which sets up the whole speech in the s8 finale of Sam’s guilt about letting Dean down, but the thing is, Dean was never honest with Sam about his year away either. He never told Sam he could have gotten out much sooner if he hadn’t stayed to find Cas. I mean Dean had assumed Sam was up there alone doing God knows what to try to bring him back, and yet still he stayed in Purgatory because things were clear there. He needed Cas. Anyway, I just find that interesting, but Cas isn’t a victim of Sam and Dean’s relationship in s8.

Who gets the honour of being cast aside? That would be Benny and Amelia, two characters they introduced in s8 specifically to highlight that Sam and Dean’s relationship doesn’t allow for anyone else to be a significant part of their life. I mean that’s nothing new, we’ve watched that happen many times before. Lisa even said as much to Dean. The thing is this time? It’s framed as a truly sad thing. That moment at the end of 8x10 when Dean has just ended things with Benny and Sam leaves Amelia, and they’re sitting alone drinking beer and watching tv is such a hollow empty moment. This is not what they want. But it’s the way things have to be.

I’m actually fascinated by Sam and Dean’s conversation in the church in the s8 finale. Not so much Dean’s assertion that there is no one else he would put before Sam, but more so what provokes it, which is Sam saying “who are you going to turn to instead of me. Another angel? Another vampire?” See the thing is Dean saying he would always put Sam first is not news. We know this and it’s not really an unhealthy statement in itself either. A lot of people would put their sibling above anything else, not less a sibling who you raised and is the most important person to you. But in this context? After what Sam said? It just highlights how unhealthy they are if Sam believes that Dean having other people in his life means he doesn’t love him enough. That he’s a disappointment to him. That’s so profoundly fucked up.

(Note, Dean tells Sam that he killed Benny for him but he doesn’t say anything about Cas. I think like I said before, this is because Cas and Dean’s relationship has largely existed out of the Sam and Dean stuff up to this point - Sam and Cas don’t even really have much of a relationship yet besides both of their connections to Dean.)

And then from here, things start getting steadily worse. But we also keep being shown how bad they are. Dean lying to Sam, taking away his free will by letting Gadreel possess him. Dean sending Cas away, Kevin dying. It’s all awful. The whole “there ain’t no me if there ain’t no you line” from 9x01 isn’t really said by Dean, it’s Gadreel, but that is how Dean feels. He does think that’s all he’s good for. And over the season we’re shown how much of himself and what he truly wants he’s had to give up because of his ingrained “Save Sammy” and “Sammy comes first” mentality. It’s always been this way for him. In 9x07 we see that he had found a happy home, a good father figure, and his first love, a first love might I add that he had to leave behind with no real explanation because Sam needed him, and Sam comes first.

I mean just one episode earlier we had him rushing out the door elated about seeing Cas and spending time with him, only for their time together to come to sad and melancholic end when Dean once again leaves Cas behind without any real explanation, because despite what he wants Sammy comes first. What he wants doesn’t matter.

See I think after the Gadreel stuff comes out is where the narrative starts to get a little wonky for me. You can clearly see that this was intended to be a shorter story that they ended up stretching out to a much longer one because of renewals. There’s also the fact that this is a formula show so they can’t necessarily be separated for longer than an episode or two. S10 is a rough one to get through at times, I think the themes still mostly hold up but it’s a rough one to get through.

S10 highlights all the connections that Dean has, Cas, Charlie, Crowley even, but Sam doesn’t really have those bonds in the same way.  For Sam it’s just Dean, so he goes down a reckless destructive “do anything to save Dean!” path and so many innocents pay the price, and ultimately with the release of The Darkness, the whole world.

They skirted right up to the edge of exploring just how toxic and dangerous their relationship had become in the season 10 finale.

DEAN: I let Rudy die. How was that not evil? I know what I am, Sam. But who were you when you drove that man to sell his soul... Or when you bullied Charlie into getting herself killed? And to what end? A..a good end? A just end? To remove the Mark no matter what the consequences? Sam, how is that not evil? I have this thing on my arm, and you're willing to let the Darkness into the world.

I can’t say evil is the right word, they were never evil, but they were wilfully blind to everything and everyone else when it came to saving each other. S10 tested my love for the show because after watching it, because there was certainly a feeling that the two of them had become the villains of this story. And don’t get me wrong, I didn’t have a problem with that, it’s just after 2 seasons of this I can’t say I had a lot of faith that this was going to be properly addressed or if we were going to keep going in circles around it. Keep being shown, it’s bad and then nothing much being done to fix it. Your mileage may vary on how it was handled, but I think s11 did a relatively ok job considering it wasn’t the end of the story, and the show needed to keep going.

See from Dean’s side a lot of the codependency rests on 1. His father’s orders to always save Sammy 2. His low self-esteem where he sees himself as nothing but a blunt instrument. 3. His guilt at not being able to perfectly fulfil every familial role in Sam’s life 4. His belief that no one could choose to love him but family has to love you. 5. The unhealthy example of what it should look like to love someone that he got from John. You give up everything but them.

For Sam (and honestly it’s not as clear for me as Dean’s side is so feel free to correct me/disagree on this) 1. Everytime he’s tried to leave and create his own life it’s never ended well. 2. His guilt over wanting freedom and a normal life when he was younger (I’m referring specifically to Stanford era here) 3. His guilt over everything Dean has given up for him. 4. John. 5. Jess.

Ultimately it all comes down to isolation. They both had to be everything to each other, and the deeper they got into this fight, the more people that they lost, the tighter they clung to this notion of family and brothers. I think s11 (and 11x23 in particular) was an important turning point, both for Sam and Dean’s relationship, as well as for them as individuals. Because they weren’t alone there anymore. Cas was there. Sam let Dean walk to his death. Of course, it would devastate him, but he knew it was what had to be done. And he didn’t walk out of that bar and go back to the bunker alone. He had Cas, he had someone who cared about him and wanted to help him and talk to him. Sure Dean asked Cas to take care of Sam for him (you know after Cas offered to walk to his death with him) but Sam let him. He let him be there for him. We didn’t get to see much before the BMOL showed up and blasted Cas away, but still, we saw enough.

I think that’s a significant difference to note why their relationship was different in the Dabb era. It wasn’t just them anymore. Cas was an important member of their family and given a level of importance he’d never been given before and couldn’t have been when the story they were telling was of the dangers of their codependency. Mary was back. Eventually, Jack would become a part of their unit too. Just the two of them wasn’t enough for them anymore. This is made abundantly clear with all of Dean’s desperate attempts to get Cas to stay in s12, followed by his inability to keep going when they lose Cas and Mary in s13. Similarly, Sam really struggles when they lose Jack and fail to get Mary back later in the season.

Another big moment is Dean letting Sam go alone to lead the hunters against the BMOL in 12x22 while he stays back to try and reach Mary. Like he tells Mary, he’s had to be a brother, a father and a mother to Sam and he never stopped seeing him as his kid, but in that moment he makes a choice. He lets Sam take charge and he shows that he trusts him and believes in him. He knows he can handle it.

Sometimes it’s not even a character growth thing. Sometimes having other people there stops you from making destructive choices even though that’s still your first instinct. I’m thinking specifically of 13x21 after Sam was killed. Dean would have run headlong into that nest of vampires and got himself torn apart, but Cas was there to stop him. He was able to make him see reason.

Basically, I think that for a long time, they thought the only relationship they could have was each other, which then became a self-fulfilling prophecy because their desperate attempts to keep each other around led to them losing the people around them. They eventually started to learn that that wasn’t true, they could have more, they were allowed to want more, and that it wasn’t an either-or situation. Dean didn’t have to choose between Sam and Cas. They didn’t have to choose between each other or Jack. The same goes for Mary. Different relationships can coexist without threatening each other, and not say that their relationship in s12-15 was all smooth sailing, but it was certainly so very different from everything that came before.

(There’s maybe a point to be made about how they didn’t have anyone or anything in the finale and how that relates to the story we got, but honestly I have no idea what the intention was with any of the choices made in that episode so I’ll leave it at that for now.)

[buddha-in-disguise]

What do we know about Supergirl S6?

Well, we know the following.

First BHS came from David & he had Chyler and Jesse with him.

Chyler was dressed in a jacket & pants and the Martian weapon on her wrist in a second photo David posted.

The main thing that stood out was the background. It suggests they’re at The Tower, & possibly with a medical monitor (I highlight it in red) in the background. If not medical, I’d say environmental or maybe Space monitor. Either way, it is an intriguing bit of background imo.

Otherwise, bar one lot of BHS from Staz, have only shown everyone is their Superhero suits (inc Alex). Kelly has been in the leather jacket she wore with the Guardian Shield for the Myx (100th) episode, with M’gann suited up alongside her.

Kelly has also been spotted in pants & a jacket - a far cry from the tight skirts & dresses from S5, & much closer to S4. We know Kelly has been on set a lot when everyone else is, plus filming at times with Chyler - so dare we hope that Kelly is actually going to be included properly this season? And that she is much more proactive, including using the Shield, like she did in Crisis & the 100th. We can certainly hope that is the case. After all, it is what pretty much all Kelly Olsen fans (myself included) have asked for since the end of S4, let alone as we watched the shitstorm aka S5 play out.

We know from Jesse there is going to be a bit of a Legion vibe going on, and that certainly tracks with the BHS photos.

We know that 6.01, 6.02, 6.03, 6.04, 6.05 & 6.06 were all wrapped before the Christmas hiatus. We also know that Chyler directed Ep 6, (which she mentioned herself when talking about it in one of her Create Change lives early on).

We know in 6.06, it involves not only the young Danvers sisters, but we definitely have Nia and Brainy playing a pretty significant role. Not only did we get them posting on an outside location set , we also know from someone who went down to where they were filming on the sports field & Nicole & Jesse were both seen on set (screen cap included in amongst the rest of them here).

We also know from a known member BTS on the SG set on Reddit posted in reply to a couple of questions that cleared up Katie’s involvement & Melissa being away from set. So we can say Melissa will be filming in scenes to add into what has already been done by the rest of the cast. We can also say Katie has been filming. So please everyone just take a breath.

Now onto sets in general.

We have had glimpses that tease Space craft, weaponry in the form of a galactic laser rifle.

We have a possibly tie in to the casting video side that came up on Vimo in regards a Prison set vibe, with the concrete corridors, but with grating shadow from lighting above (see Nicole’s tiktok), & separately, Jen Clarke (Melissa’s stunt double) standing alongside a circular plinth of some kind, with grating around it.

Then we have the futuristic look that David was standing in for his directorial episode after the hiatus.

We had a possible slate on Vimeo that suggested a witch villain?

So, I’m hoping that - we have this season set up much more like S1 & S2, with tight sets, outer space/magic/more than one Villain, or like Reign, a central villain, but not necessarily through the entire season.

As for Rosemary (the slate on Vimeo) I can’t help but wonder if this is going to be a version of Amparon Cardenas, aka La Dama, especially as in the DC universe she is from Earth Prime and has known magic powers.

Another aspect of the canon DC character is that she kills off half the future Justice League, but this is where I think it could tie in with Chyler’s directors episode 6.06 - she brainwashes a group of teenagers, who in another reality would have become the legion of Superhero’s. She effectively makes them her slaves.

Is that why Nia and Brainy have to travel back to Midvale? Are the young Danvers sisters brainwashed? Do they need to go around fixing the past to save the future?

Well, that would certainly not be something Chyler has ever done before, & would probably I imagine be a pretty hard 1st ep to direct, so again tracks with what she has said.

If Rosemary blames Kara etc for Earth Prime changing, & so she changes with it (eg loss of powers) it would certainly give good grounds for a story of revenge.

Honestly, as long as we have Kelly, Alex, Nia, Kara, & Lena all actually playing their roles properly, & not just performative like S5 was, and Dansen, Brainia and yes, Supercorp to actually happen - it will be a step up. Not that it would be hard to step up when you’ve hit flat rock bottom, scraping of the barrel the previous season.

I’m going to have forgotten something, I always do, so if anyone has additional thoughts on this, please do comment. Also apologies for any typos as I’ve not checked this.

[stuffingisforfools]

A fic I will never write but do think about constantly

Sam is at Stanford (same point in time as when dean comes to grab him in s1) he hasn’t spoken to dean in 2 yrs and it sucks but he’s rationalized it to himself, that he can’t have the normal life he wants and have dean in it. He tries not to think about it.

It’s the night before the law school interview and the same thing happens as in canon. Sam wakes up cause he hears someone moving around in their apartment except for this time it isn’t dean, it’s a 13 yo girl.

Before Sam can do anything the girl throw holy water at him, slices him with a silver knife and asks him what Poughkeepsie means

Sams confused and Jess is freaking out but he tells her that it’s a code him and his brother used to use, that it means to drop everything and run

The girl visibly relaxes and what she says next rocks sams entire world. “My name is Emma, I’m your niece.”

Sam is like no, that’s not possible, amd starts to ask what the fuck does she mean by that but Emma interrupts him befor he can finish speaking

“That’s not important. Deans missing, I haven’t seen him in a couple days”

And sams like “I haven’t seen him in years, I don’t know what to tell you.”

Emma doesn’t stop pressing and says “dean went on a hunting trip and I haven’t heard from him in a couple days.”

And Sam tries to get Jess to leave the room at that but this is a 13 yo girl not sams brother and she refuses

Emma interrupts them again while they argue “My dad said that if anything happened to come to you. He said you’d help me (what dean had really said was that Sam could keep her safe, she isn’t supposed to go after him if something happens, but despite everything she is her fathers daughter) my dads in trouble so are you gonna help or not.”

Before sams can respond Jess elbows him in the side and says “of course we’re gonna help you. How about we sit down for a second and talk things through. I’ll grab us some drink.” She side eyes Sam until he gets the message and he relunctantly leads Emma over to their table.

Couple notes: Emma is still an Amazon here just the whole thing happened during sams time at Stanford, dean got her right after him and Sam last talked so just under 2 years, John is still around but dean hid Emma’s existence from him and cut contact as much as he could cause he was afraid John would kill her and that’s why he told her to run to Sam if anything happened to him, cas is in this cause I love him but I haven’t figured out to put him in the story, Emma is 11 when dean gets her just because I think it’s more fun that way.

[lesmond-sycamore]

OH SHIT I FORGOT I FORGOT TO DUMP ABT MY S3 SOREN WHOOPS

OKAY SO first of all I want to say that the biggest reason I think he'd be the final boss is because of the fact that he's literally called the Builder of Worlds in the intro of "The Order of the Stone" like. hello? sounds a little more impressive than "The Redstone Engineer," "The Rougue," and "The Warrior" imo. also, he has a book in every world in the Portal Hall + Fred's Keep, meaning that he's been to all of these seemingly impossible places only available to powerrful people (the Old Builders and the Admins). how else in the world would he be able to get to these places without being powerful himself?

also, the command block. holy shit where did it come from? you can't craft one (there's no proof Ellegaard's would've actually been crafted), so where did it come from? my answer: Soren spawned it in as a way to show off his powers without seeming like he did it on purpose. he tells Jesse that initially, the Order did actually rough it out on adventures, but once they found the command block, they began to use it and rely on it more and more. this begs the question: if Soren's so powerful, why would he go through the trouble of using it? for that, let's look at his past

in my s3, it's explained that Soren created every world, and had 3 children who created the dimensions. "The Sun" created the overworld so that the inhabitants of the worlds could live happily in the day, "The Moon" created the Nether for the adventurers of the worlds, and "The Star" who created the End for ████████████████. these three were dubbed as "The Creators," and they worked together when creating the dimensions, and sprinkled in a litte bit of each other's dimensions in each other ("The Moon" made the nights filled with monsters and filled the End with loot to entice people to journey through the dimensions, "The Sun" made glowstone/shroom lights in the Nether and made end rods in the End to show that no matter the outlook, there's always light (they also made chorus fruit in the End so that people would have something to eat), and "The Star" made the Endermen available to every dimension so that way they'd ████████)

after that, he dedicated admins for every world who would use the dimensions to sculpt the worlds how they saw fit, make/remix mobs, and add their own blocks/mechanics/etc, but most of them became corrupted, ran away, or killed. because of this, he wanted to wipe everything and start again, but he wanted to give his worlds the benefit of the doubt and so, he decided to explore them, hidden amongst the common folk

in every world he traveled to, he was alone, scrounging for resources, not able to use his powers so that he could experience life the way the people who lived on the worlds did. it was... humbling, really. not using your powers is a nice way to really feel alive after getting what you wanted with the clap of your hands for thousands of years. he ended up running into the Old Builders soon after they had formed and joined them (hence the book A Man Voyaging Forever from his time alone). it was with them that he researched and created the redstone heart (hence The Redstone Heart in Harper's lab).

he actually watched The Games (and occssionally participated in them), but once Hadrian and Mevia began to become corrupted, he and Harper dipped to Crown Mesa, where after some time, PAMA happened, and he dipped because PAMA chipping him would be catastrophic. once reaching the world where "A Portal to Mystery" takes place, he began to occasionally study enderman and followed them around, observing them in their hauntings (hence Walking Among the Enderman). unfortunately that world was difficult to really observe them because the world prefered to spawn zombies at any given chance, so he dipped again.

when he made it to Sky City, Benedict was incredibly useful to his research. he befriended Isa and asked her only for the endermen spawn eggs, and in return, he would give her information about mobs that he had acquired over the years so she could know how to get/use the best drops mobs had to offer (hence Habits of the Endermen, whixh he gifted it to her once completed) the only issue was that he couldn't fully observe them in the overworld and thus, he dipped.

that brings us to the world of Fred, Xara, and Romeo. he had joined The Oasis and befriended the admins (although they didn't know who he actually was) and was actually very close friends with Fred. Fred inspired Soren to break the cycle and start a permanent life here (hence A Brave New Enderman), but after Fred died and the world was bedrocked over, he tried to dip again, but was horrified to find that the portal he used to get there was gone. turns out when the Old Builders got to that world to kidnap competitors, they broke and replaced the portal so that it would be on the surface. with this, Soren began a quest to find the portal.

however, once he got to the surface, he had nowhere to start, so he went adventuring again to search for clues. turns out that when you don't adventure for a while, you get rusty, and he almost got seriously injured during a fight with a hoard of spider jockeys. but just when he thought he was going to get seriously hurt, someone (or rather, some people) jumped in to help. these some people where Gabriel and Ivor. the two had become adventuring buddies because Gabriel was the perfect fighter and Ivor was the perfect brewer and enchanter, and they worked really well together. Soren was invited to join the two due to his extensive knowledge of the world, and because he had the ability to be a great member physically once he got back into the swing of things. soon, Ellegaard and Magnus joined the team, and they became the "Stone Age" (this name was changed after the Ender Dragon encounter because they needed something that sounded cooler). at this point, he was quite truthfully happy

but then came the command block. Soren had always carried it as a fail-safe, but when the group began to take on more dangerous challenges and almost fatally wound themselves, he began to use the command block. he had planted it so that it had seemed like it was discovered, but he knew the truth. and with that, he began to use it. not because he wanted the easy way out like Ivor believed, but because he didn't want lose any more of his friends.

that brings us to s1. with Soren losing Magnus/Ellegaard and seeing the destruction and pain he himself had caused because of his command block, he did what he knew best and ran away, leaving his only friends to fend for themselves.

now let's talk about season 2. Ivor doesn't know where he is, but my s3 explains that Soren's lack of an appearance in s2 is because of the fact he was once again trying to run away from his problems, but he still doesn't know where the portal to the portal hall is, and was just roughing it out once again by himself. that is, until he encountered a very particular enderman that doesn't seem to be under the control of the Ender Dragon. despite this new companion, once he's heard about what happened to jesse and the admins, he realizes just how badly he set up the worlds and is back to thinking about wiping the universes clean and starting over, and now, his plan is already underway (hence why the au Jesse shows up in the first place)

now, you may be wondering "how does that make him the final boss?" well, it's simple. before he becomes the last boss of the series, there's another adventure right before it that involves "The Sun," "The Moon," and "The Star" that takes place as the first arc of the game. by the time that arc is finished with, the universes that are being wiped are getting closer and closer to the world he inhabits, making Jesse the only one able to stop him and save the day

[waveridden]

what are your ideas about jess and dot?

thanks for asking! i’m about to say so many words at you

here is something that gets lost in the retelling: polkadot patterson and jessica telephone were not always legends. we don’t have exact statistics about their performance in s1, because we weren’t keeping track of that kind of thing then, but we do have the election results. dot and jess were both randomly chosen by two max-out blessings (two remarkably simple blessings, might i add - future blessings have fun names but these were just called “max out hitting” and max out pitching”) and then immediately chosen again by two team-swap blessings.

so imagine dot and jess, two completely random players on two completely random teams that won these blessings by completely random chance... who are suddenly the best at what they do. that’s not an exaggeration; in s1, people weren’t just randomly five stars. these two people, these two perfectly average players, got the blessings that made them powerful, and then immediately got uprooted from their teams and moved to new ones.

maybe this is me just editorializing, but here is a question for you: imagine you have just been blessed with divine power. imagine you have been thrown into an entirely new home at the whims of people who claim to love you. and then imagine there is exactly one other person in the world who has just experienced the same thing. do you call that person? i would call that person. this is where the story begins.

i don’t think dot and jess are Friends friends. they’re not “call each other at 2am” friends and they’re not even really “i’d pick you up from the airport” friends. but in the beginning, before there were blessings like we know them today, before there was some kind of common physical change, they are the only two who were rewritten. they are the only ones who understand.

i think they talk, sure - i think maybe they meet up the day after election day and talk about how things are going. i think they’re friendly. i think they enjoy playing against one another, when the circumstances permit. but this isn’t a story about friendship. this is a story about being famous.

dot and jess both handle being chosen by the fans in different ways. jess leans into it, hard. jessica telephone, killer for the pies - she loves it, and they love her. she’s massively adored and she plays that up, leans into the celebrity. dot doesn’t do that in the same way. i think jess sees the blessing as something to grow into and dot sees it as something to live up to, an impossible standard, a bar that they’ll never meet but have to keep trying.

but it’s actually jessica who becomes disillusioned with blaseball first, for a very simple reason: blaseball takes something from her first. it takes sebastian and replaces him with a copy that’s not quite right. she’s seen teammates burn, seen them choke on peanuts, but this is the first time it was her life, her personal life that got changed. this is the first thing it’s done that she cannot forgive.

seasons go on. dot keeps pitching, aiming for perfection; jessica keeps playing, even if her smiles for the fans are a little more plastic now. if you’d like to expand the narrative, nagomi mcdaniel enters the conversation about now: she gets a boost from a peanut and another from a blessing. she goes from one of the best natural batters to the best batter, period. there’s a new legend, someone else to go out for drinks with after elections end.

and then the idol board appears.

in season six, jessica and nagomi both get shelled. (dot is alone for elections, one constant touchstone for half a decade gone.) in season seven, jessica gets out, but dot is shelled. (jessica alone; she can handle it.)

but it’s season eight that matters, because season eight is when the fans put jessica back. season eight is when the fans are so interested in their idol payouts that they don’t care what they’re doing to her. season eight is when she is superallergic and people wonder what that’s going to do to her in the shell. as if it’s abstract. as if it’s something they can randomly wonder about.

at the end of season nine, the fans also decide to play a game with polkadot’s life. something will happen to the shelled player at the top of the idol board, and we don’t know what, but the fans want to find out. so the fans idolize dot, and it turns out to free them. it could’ve killed them; it didn’t. within a handful of days nagomi mcdaniel is also unshelled, random chance at work again. things are looking up. there is something approaching hope.

this is what i want you to understand about the shelled one’s pods, about the idol board, about everything. the fans gambled with polkadot’s life and won. the fans gambled with jessica’s life and lost.

i originally had this idea over grand siesta, so i’m going to end it there: jessica has fallen from the sky down into kansas city, and dot is back in canada. it’s that first and last thing that interest me: did you know polkadot was on the breath mints, back in season one? did you know that only seven original breath mints players were left on the team over the grand siesta, that two of them are alternates?

everything changes. blaseball is not kind, even to its stars.

polkadot begins in kansas city, with a regular season and then a blessing and a series of increasingly irregular seasons. jessica ends in kansas city, after losing her brother three times in two ways, after being chosen and then not even getting to remain the best player. polkadot was chosen by the fans to be saved, and jessica was chosen to be doomed. polkadot is here because they want to see her, and jessica never wants to see them again - even if it’s not their fault that the fans rescued them, it’s hard not to be bitter about being the one left behind.

everything changes, but it’s still the two of them. even with jessica newly jaded, even with polkadot squiddish, even with reality overwriting itself time and again - it’s the two of them, parallel paths tangling together. it always has been.

this is what blaseball does: it gives you one person, only one, who understands unconditionally, and then it makes that friendship fraught, hard, impossible. and this is what people do: they maintain that friendship anyways.

[mcd-ms-rants]

I wrote the whole post and TUMBLR DECIDED TO DELETE THE WHOLE THING

anyways it’s finally here

take

STUFF I DIDNT LIKE ABOUT MYSTREET SEASON 4:

• ok but the animations here are great. actually tho they're so fluid and clear. Credits to whoever made them!!

• and now let’s do the real thing

• ok so first off this is where the actual plot starts. I know that some people were getting bored of the monotony of the slice of life episodes so they liked it. Again there’s nothing inherently wrong with having it but you have to remember that these characters most likely weren’t written to be in a plot and I say this because their personalities are funny and lighthearted. Their clearly meant for comedy. This also makes them redundant for plot since most of them a few characters barely have any development which is probably why like half the cast was dropped. im not sure how far back jess had planned the plot but needless to say most of the characters wouldn‘t be able to fit there. Travis, Katelyn, KC and the sk’s just dipped for the whole season and even when kc, Travis and Katelyn do show up in s5 their personalities really took a beating

• WHERE DID LAURANCE AND DANTE GO?? We never see them after s3. its probably because their personalities were too funny for plot but laurance was a shadow knight in mcd and since the whole of mys is so hyped up on the whole ‘mcd and mys are connected’ thing by all means he should’ve been there too

• it makes sense that since the lodge is jointly owned by the Ro’meaves and the Lycans, Garroth, Zane and Aaron- and by extension, Aphmau- would come along. it make sense that they would ask Lucinda for help- she’s a skilled witch and has been their friend since high school. theyre literally neighbors. it makes NO SENSE to being Kim- a girl whom they’ve barely ever interacted with and whom they barely know- to a place meant for close family to go to. Ok from a plot perspective yes Kim needed to be there but Aphmau logically doesnt know that yet.

• how does ghost/emmalyn even exist?? We’ve seen emmalyn and kenmur in s1 and they’re ok. not dead or anything. Yes I know that this is mcd emmalyn and she is directly referencing mcd Zane when she says that’s the only name she remembers from when she was alive but that raises two questions- first, how can both mcd and mys versions of her exist at the same time?? and second, what exactly happened between her and mcd zane?? It sounds like she either hates him way more than she loves kenmur (or she’d remember him too) that it’s the only name she remembers or its Stockholm Syndrome.

• I feel that since the plot demanded a ghost vessel thing that was the only reason Aphmau brought Kim. it’s pretty clear that Dante and laurance wouldn’t fit the role because of their personalities so she just remade an older character and changed her completely right down to her skin to fit the plot. her whole personality changes with it- look at her I mean she even becomes more open when she talks. Again this only happened because none of the existing characters could fill that role because IT WASNT MEANT TO HAVE PLOT

• no one likes you michi girl take the hint

• seeing liochant brings back meMoriEs

• what was that potion that lucinda made and which Garroth threw on Zane?? its clear that it cured him from the effects of the forever potion but the bigger question is WHY DONT THEY USE THIS IN S6?? Ok yes in s4 Aphmau gets freed by the power of love(TM) but that doesn’t mean you do that for everyone

• as someone who liked Laurance’s character I miss him :(

• ok there’s WAY TOO MANY PROBLEMS with Ein and his villain shtick. Ein is basically some obsessive werewolf yandere boy who has an unhealthy obsession with aphmau and hates Aaron. and the cherry on top is that Aphmau is his HALF SISTER. THATS INC*ST. That’s GROSS. What is it with Aphmau antagonists and not having a clear motive or backstory?? mcd Zane and Ein both suffer from this and it shows. there were definitely better motives to give him- he doesn’t have to be centered around Aphmau all the time!! And even if you don’t want to go to all the trouble of rewriting the plot you could at least make it so that Ein knows that he and Aphmau are related. Maybe he wants a perfect sister instead and he’s willing to go to any lengths to get her there. it would still be dark and serious but it would be SO MUCH BETTER than the current plotline. Also showing the contrast between his pdh and s4 self and then not giving any semblance of an explanation really makes it difficult to imagine where it all went wrong. yes Michael definitely had something to do with it but to what extent?? How much is Ein actually in control of?? Is he under the influence of a forever potion when he turns Zane, Lucinda and Aphmau to his side?? Is he still under its influence when he fights Aaron?? look I get that they can’t reveal everything but leaving out THIS MUCH and not even revealing it in s6 makes it very difficult to accurately nail Ein’s character.

• how is Aaron even revived?? is that Irene?? how is she here and what is she doing here?? Can we have answers pls. also it makes no sense that she saves Aaron TWICE- once in s4 and second in s6. How does death even work here if Irene can just swoop in and bring them back to life. i feel like none of the villains ever count as threats then because you know that a cryptic mysterious goddess who somehow looks just like your girlfriend will revive you.

• how did Aaron even survive?? No seriously how?? We know that there’s no service or wifi up there at the lodge so using their phones is out of the question. i don’t think Lucinda would be able to conjure up a whole medical team for Aaron. and they're on a MOUNTAIN. It takes precious time to get down from it. for context, even if they sent Garroth (since he’s the fastest) down to get help they’d have to wait for him to reach the village area at the base of the mountain, get a phone, call for help, wait for said help to arrive and get Aaron to a hospital. meanwhile Aaron is bleeding out from multiple gashes on his chest made at like point black range that are critical at best and fatal at worst. (his only saving grace is the snow he’s on which would help to numb the wound because its cold but he has like FIVE deep chest wounds and the snow isn’t even on his wounds.) Ya sorry I don’t see how he manages to survive.

• did I mention that I miss Laurance?? • Why is Aaron not at a hospital I don’t even see a ventilator or oxygen mask near him. Listen I’m not a medical expert but those gashes landed straight on his chest which means straight on his lungs and dangerously close to his heart. how is he alive. how is he not choking on blood right now. we know he’s bleeding out- I’m pretty sure one of the doctors even says “Mrs Lycan, we need to draw more blood for your son.” yes he’s bleeding out why is no one trying to idk stop the wound through pressure with a cloth or something?? (Note: it’s been a while since I’ve watched s4, so if I do get anything wrong thats why!!) also why are the werewolf doctors so chill about Aaron’s ultima eyes? like yes they’re doctors they could’ve been sworn to secrecy or maybe they work for the Lycans but Derek is shown to be really paranoid about anyone finding out about Aaron being the ultima. how does he know they won’t tell it to someone else??

k imma head out now-

thanks for reading!! <3 <3

[red-hood-vigilante]

more hbo spn rambles, thoughts, drabbles etc. long long post.

part 1 here

there’s some things i’ve omitted here bc others have already posted about those things, certain headcanons and characterizations and stuff. those posts are in my likes somewhere (and i’ll reblog them someday), and there’s some posts i’ve read but not liked, which i now can only vaguely remember, which is why some ideas/thoughts are similar

ALSO most of these follow the model i talked about in part one: how s1-5 will stay more or less how they are but s6-10 is changed (some things are cut out entirely, some things are tweaked and some characters + arcs are more fleshed out. more focus on sam’s trauma and post-cage adaptation to the real world as well as dean letting his rage and control issues consume him and how he’d recover and redeem himself)

as i typed these paragraphs, i realized i really have 10 seasons mapped out and ready to go. hbo hire me!!

alright go:

sam and dean get wearier as the show progresses (second half), and eventually they stop putting so much care and thought in the people they save. like...hm how do i say this, like as long as a victim/victims are saved, they don’t care about how that happens or how those people suffer potential consequences, like if the victims lose a limb or have their homes burned down because of the monster, then sam and dean don’t really care. they saved your life, now they’ll leave you with your life in potential shambles and not care because all that matters is that they saved your life, not how it is afterwards. they still care about saving that one person, but eventually it pales a little in comparison to a war between heaven and hell, being the vessels etc. ---> saving people becomes less about making sure they’re actually alright and healing from horrific events and more about just making sure they have a pulse before they move on

when angels lose their wings they are either burned off in the actual fall or ripped off of them in their vessels, which leaves pretty nasty scars on the vessel

ed and harry are so young and bright eyed about the whole hunting thing; sam and dean as kids, idolizing it, finding it exciting and intriguing when they shouldn’t. sam and dean try to get them out of the business before they too are too traumatized and desensitized to do anything but hunt. neither sam or dean will say it but they are jealous of ed and harry and their freedom to leave, and hate them for choosing this voluntarily instead of being dragged into it by tragedy

hbo spn is a slow burn. there’s a lot more shots of sam and dean in silence just sitting together after a hunt, exhausted and too tired to move yet. they’re covered in blood and guts on the side of the road after killing or covered with dirt in a graveyard after burning bones, sitting next to the fire, just watching it. the times they park the car and watch the stars? we get to see it. 

dean wears rings and the amulet all the time in the beginning, for the first five seasons. the rings vary; first they’re some of john’s old ones and stuff he finds in thrift stores. then later on he begins wearing rings from people they’ve saved/haven’t saved as a keepsakes etc. when he begins his descent to the holy murderer in s6-10 he wears less and less rings. they don’t matter anymore -> symbolically shedding who he was and what mattered to him

the only accessories sam has is a rosary/cross around his neck. he has jess’ engagement ring in his pocket/wallet. after the cage he vaguely remembers why the ring was there and who jessica was (more on this further down)

the four horsemen are manifestations of different aspects of human nature at its most grotesque and strongest, can’t be killed as long as humans live. war is conflict, famine is desire, pestilence is physical and mental illnesses.

(the seven sins are like the horsemen, tulpas of human nature instead of demons)

death isn’t a concentration of an existing aspect of humans as much as it is the end of life, the antithesis of life. death the oldest of the horsemen and has existed since the beginning of any life, organism, cell and atom. the opposite of life and light, the other half of god (as i’m typing this i’m confused as to why  amara was the opposite of god instead of death). death isn’t evil or good, remains 100% objective. doesn’t care for sam or dean at all, but has a begrudging respect for their stubbornness and entertainment they provide due to their flat out refusal to do as they’re told by celestial bodies when anyone else would crumble

by including death i feel like it very naturally begs questions of who decides when someone dies, when someone lives, why would death follow these guides instead of reaping whomever whenever, what happens if a life isn’t reaped at the right time etc. the reader in me adore the idea of death having a library with books and records of everyone who has ever lived and died and how they died - but then, who writes these books and why? do they decide, and if in that case, how? these questions are above my paygrade but you know what i mean? like there has to be some sort of system right, god created everything, death executes to maintain order, some third party deity writes the laws and the books. the three branches of government. ok but it’s hbo so again, i think we shouldn’t dive this deep into things, like as much as these topics intrigue me i don’t want to stray too much from the dirt road trip aesthetic

shapeshifters are extremely rare because they don’t require any kind of human blood or organs/sacrifice to live

i want more exploration of how magic is like science, like it just needs the right ingredients and right conditions. sam thinks of magic as an obscure branch of science; it just requires research and knowledge and clear intentions because science can be controlled and do a lot of good when used responsibly. dean doesn’t like it. he doesn’t trust the unpredictable elements and he’s seen enough to know it never goes well. magic is a force that can’t be controlled by anyone.

sam and dean have full on fist fights regularly. to practice and keeping each other sharp, but also because they’re siblings. they’re feral, insane and unhinged with each other and they get on each other’s nerves A LOT. it’s petty and childish and sometimes it can get a lil ugly but it becomes their way of family therapy. after a fight the next scene cuts to sam and dean with ruffled clothes, nosebleeds and swollen lips at a diner eating silently after beating each other up. either they sit in silence because they’re tired or both are harping on the other’s openings and weaknesses

sometimes they’ll fight a little dirty but they do so in different ways; dean will pull the old ‘look!’ and point to something and then tackle sam when he turns to look while sam will just cry out in fake pain which makes dean stop dead in his tracks before sam headbutts him or kicks him in the groin

we, the audience get used to these fights, they’re sometimes funny and for comic relief, sometimes for narrative purposes (like tricking a monster they’re fighting each other when they’re really not) BUT. then comes the times when sam and dean are actually fighting without holding back and we see how much they are capable of hurting each other or how heartbreaking and difficult it can be to watch when of them are incapable of fighting back/doesn’t defend himself -> swan song when dean doesn’t fight back against possessed sam, or when dean beats soulless sam unconscious

sam and dean also just verbally bully each other constantly but they do have their odd ways of expressing affection and care. they get the other person their fave snack whenever they go grocery shopping without being asked to and are the only other one they truly trust to have their back in hunts. have a cup of coffee ready before the other asks for one. brothers and each other’s best friend. nightmare duo but in a sweet way. the cooperation of ‘the usual suspects’ when they’re in different interrogation rooms but still has the cover story down to a t. code words and code names and cover stories, they know it all

when sam and dean fight together against a common enemy they’re a damn nightmare - because they know each others weaknesses and habits, they cover each other perfectly and in complete silence. they’ve been at it together since they were kids and read each other’s nonverbal cues like a picture book

to build off of what i said in part 1; the winchesters are pretty hated in the hunter’s community. even the people sam and dean frequently work with (bobby, ellen, jo, ash, rufus, bela, kevin, charlie, castiel etc) roasts them all the time and don’t hesitate with calling them out on their self-pitying crap when it get’s too much (spn was just objectively better when characters weren’t afraid of dragging sam and dean through the mud for being selfish and stupid) and this WILL persist in hbo spn. the only reason people continue working with sam and dean is because they know deep down a lot of the things that happens aren’t sam and dean’s fault - but they still blame them for it. doesn’t make it easier how sam or dean sometimes start crap on purpose to save the other

the winchesters are terrifying and people for sure tell stories about them, but not like ‘they’re heroes’, more like ‘they’re insane and dangerous. stay the fuck away from them’. some stories are true, like how they’ve worked with demons, but some are just game of telephone. (dean has apparently a ghost he is frequently possessed by while sam is actually a mutant vampire). hunters hate and are scared of the winchesters. sam and dean are never invited to hunter stuff (burials, memorials etc) but crash them nonetheless even though the hunters do NOT want them there.

you know what drives me insane when i think about it? how some characters in spn already are their hbo spn counterparts; john. mary. adam. maybe kevin?

other things that already are their hbo spn counterparts: dean throwing away the amulet right in front of sam. eyes burning when angels are seen. how ghosts are just tragedies, stuck in a loop they can’t leave. how a lot of the monsters they meet are just victims or their circumstances or the first victim of a curse. the impala being sam and dean’s home. dean not knowing how to comfort sam when he’s upset other than trying to do things for sam that usually brings dean comfort (driving the impala, listening to rock music etc). the roadhouse. heaven being an eternal version of the memories that made you the happiest even though it’s not real. sam wanting independence and freedom but never fully having it. dean fearing being alone more than anything else and that’s where he always ends up. sam has an eating disorder after the demon blood and dean has an alcohol problem he refuses to see as a problem. dean saying “i’d do it again” without an ounce of regret and pouring himself a drink when sam tells him it was fucked up to lie to him about gadreel

the demon/angel hybrid: THIS could be sooo interesting to explore. an angel and demon hybrid are you kidding me?? not to toot my own horn too much but i’m so clever. i should write this story myself. SO. does this creature have parents who fucked in their vessels or was this an experiment by god (yes i love the ‘mad scientist’ idea, that really should’ve been played up way more) or did a pre-existing creature (human or otherwise) drink demon blood and angel grace at the same time so that it created itself? so much potential for some really intriguing storytelling and character exploration - not only the creature itself and what they would be like, but also for the people around; sam, dean, castiel, jack etc. how would they react to this thing that is the very definition of defying heaven and hell and all the natural laws? does it exist before the show starts or will we see its birth?

the powers of the demon/angel hybrid would be tricky; a mix of holy and defiant, grotesque and beautiful. unconsciously forces people to tell the truth when talking to them. poisons whatever they touch. eyes of a demon, wings of an angel. can smite but skin will burn when touching iron. can do deals but will require a sacrifice in return, not a soul, usually a body part taken then and there (the hybrid eats it. it favours eyeballs and the liver - angels like raw meat). lights always flicker. makes things explode when angry (esp people and cars). can manipulate feelings, thoughts and memories. can travel to both heaven and hell, not welcome in either places. + standard stuff like telekinesis, teleportation, mind reading, super strength etc. 

sam and dean’s wardrobe are pretty much the same; whatever’s cheap and not covered in blood. however, they do have stylistic differences. sam thinks graphic tees are funny, dean uses whatever’s black combined with john’s leather jacket. their wardrobe melds as they stop thinking of themselves as individuals and more of “me and my brother,”. their clothes are tattered and torn to shreds all the time. hand me downs, hand me ups. when they stray off their “path” and do things that are the crux of a storyline/character arc, this would reflect in their clothes. when sam is with ruby and becomes more and more “evil” he wears more and more red, a colour he has stated in the past he doesn’t really like. when dean is dead, sam starts to wear his rings and john’s and dean’s leather jacket. when dean decides he’s going to say yes to michael he dresses in white, when sam is dead dean takes off every piece of jewelry except the amulet. he holds it clenched in his fists when he’s whispering what comes close to a prayer

logically the amulet should have a backstory but you know what? i love that it’s hinted to be just a piece of cheap jewelry sam found in a thrift store he decided to give to dean. but narratively it should be explained so... idk. what could be logical solution as to why it would react to GOD himself? maybe god wore it once cuz he thought it was neat but he sold it for three dollars because he wanted coffee and then sam found it a week later

i would prefer it if god didn’t show up at all (absent father number one) but if he DID he’s not all powerful just a true neutral (like death, 100% objective) who created a thing that just took a life of its own, much like a parent and a child - the parent helps the child but can’t control it. the times he did intervene or tried to do something it didn’t really have any real long lasting effect so he gave up on trying a while ago. 

@spneveryseason talked about this, how the storyline of sam being possessed by gadreel would be horrifying if we saw everything from sam’s perspective instead of dean’s (her fic is wonderful). in the ‘dean slowly descends into a righteous murderer to become holy’ idea i have this tracks so damn well because again, if dean believes something is right, it is right, no questions about it. everyone around him is like “that’s really fucked up and you should make amends” but dean doesn’t see any reasons for why - sam is alive isn’t he? and seeing it from sam’s pov would really underline how horrifying, dehumanizing and belittling that experience was

john and mary are adam and eve. sam and dean are cain and abel are michael and lucifer. time is a flat circle. history never stops repeating itself. 

sam is the villain of s4. he is manipulated and key information is withheld from him but in the end... would it made a difference? it crossed his mind, that he could be tricked because ruby is a demon after all, but maybe he likes the power, the feeling of freedom, that he wasn’t just the baby, the one who always needs permission to do things. if he has to drain possessed people to get that power... so be it. and it’s for a good purpose, until it isn’t. he’s hungry for more, to be feared and respected. he’s enticed by lucifer’s sweet words, the potential of all that power and the idea of ruling two out of three realms. dean manages to pull him back from the brink because sam decides he doesn’t want to be what john thought he was and fail dean and himself like that.

dean is the villain in s9. he is controlling, the mark of cain without the mark. what he says goes - it’s not a democracy, it’s a dictatorship. he doesn’t see how much pain, doubt and fear he causes the people around him. if some victims or civilians die on his watch that doesn’t matter - just some collateral damage. sam can’t make dean listen to him because dean is the older one, the one who’s always called the shots. dean is the angelic one, heaven’s chosen warrior, he is untouchable and unkillable. he’s is an excellent killer, filling the void with blood and rage which is better than the crippling fear of loneliness carved into his bones. 'i butcher for love, to protect,’ he tells himself. ‘why shouldn’t i exterminate, regardless of the cost? i’ve followed the rules, i’ve always sacrificed. now i call the shots. it’s my right.’

sam’s hell trauma is never magically removed. he’s stuck with the memories and the nightmares and the occasional hallucinations. castiel can’t do anything but offers to wipe his memory completely, but sam says no, he is still doing penance. 

after dean comes back from hell he starts calling himself old man and jokes a lot about he’s 40 years older now (after he’s more comfortable about speaking about hell) 

when sam comes back he feels ancient (he’s over 900 years old at least but he lost count), weary, tired and so so so out of place in this world. he’s forgotten how to put gas in a car, how to drive, how to use a credit card, all the song lyrics he and dean used to yell together, the faces of people he knew before he fell, the softness of a bed, the schools he went to, most of the hunts he and dean, how john died, who mary is, the initials carved into the impala, the taste of food that isn’t raw meat. it’s so much he’s forgotten that he has to relearn. he prefers figuring things out with castiel instead of dean because castiel doesn’t silently resent him for everything he’s forgotten

sam doesn’t laugh anymore. despite dean’s many and castiel’s few awkward attempts, it’s more like quick smile and a quiet “hmm”. on some days he recoils when he sees blood and guts, on other days he’s so apathetic it’s unnerving

sam sympathizes with the brought back mary and castiel more than ever. dean tries to get sam to remember things he’s forgotten from his childhood but sam can’t connect with it anymore. he stopped being that sam a long time ago. dean doesn’t know what else to do than try to force this connection to be revitalized and he fails. sam isn’t that person anymore and this wedge in their relationship becomes a central factor in dean’s s6-10 desperation and isolation. sam is here and safe but it’s not really sam, not the sam dean grew up with

while sam has forgotten how to make coffee, he now knows everything about angels, effective torture tricks, a bunch of lore + biblical history, how to navigate hell, the most powerful and influential demons, rare and powerful spells as well as perfect enochian (he will speak enochian without realizing and it feels more natural than english). lucifer and michael were surprisingly talkative (raging about the unfairness) when taking their anger and hatred out on sam and adam and each other. sam had access to all of lucifer’s memories and knowledge for the time he was the one in control. walking library and encyclopedia of biblical lore.

he still has some muscle memory from hunting and sparring, but sam is ghostly thin and very rusty. even though he’s an expert on lore, he’s not fit to go on hunts anymore and he knows it. 

sam remembers adam and swears he’ll try to get him out, but he can’t. just thinking about the cage makes him vomit. he can’t talk about it, much less go near it. after a while sam thinks it might be better to let adam stay down there than let him come back up and feel this crushing emptiness and loss of direction

sam’s trials take place in s9 instead of 8; coinciding with dean’s villain arc. for sam the trials are a chance to redeem himself again, this time for good by closing hellgates forever. they’re scrubbing him clean of the demon blood and his sins and they give him a sense of purpose again now that he can’t join hunts anymore. it doesn’t matter if he dies because of it. it would be nice with a permanent and peaceful death that did something good. dean is taken aback by sam’s devotion to repent for something that happened years ago and for something sam has already paid for a thousand times over. dean realizes how messed up he himself has become and how he’s helped put sam here, on the cusp of self sacrifice again because of sickening guilt and self hatred. dean begs sam to not complete the trials at the cost of his own life and swears he’ll better himself, be a friend and a brother, not a jailer, dictator or a murderer. ‘if you won’t give yourself or life another chance, please give me one.’ ---> s10 pacifist dean learning to let go of the control, the violent tendencies and the rage

oh wait what if gadreel still possessed sam after the trials to heal him but sam is the one who invites the angel in? he’ll keep his promise to dean about staying alive, as well as heal from the inside and have breaks from the world when he doesn’t want to be present, like he and gadreel will alternate being the one in control. he keeps it a secret from dean and helps gadreel imitate him so dean won’t notice. it’s not so bad, being possessed by this angel - sam can say no anytime and gadreel is a nice guy. since they alternate on who’s present they can access each other’s memories, which is terrifying and embarrassing at first, but since gadreel and sam have been tricked and used by lucifer and been punished for it for far too long, they understand each other. now another creature knows their trauma and terrors without the need for verbal explanation. also having an angel residing in his body makes sam feel like he can hunt properly again because gadreel can heal him and take over in situations sam’s overpowered. this could show how messed up sam has come to view himself and his body. 

dean is conflicted when he finds out; sam lied but gadreel does help sam heal, sam’s traumatized and his self-worth is fucked up and dean has contributed to that. dean convinces sam to push gadreel out, that sam is still valuable, loved and a good person who shouldn’t be in a place where he views his body and mind like a property to be occupied. sam’s faith begins to come back bit by bit, not in god, but in himself, his brother, in the good things in life. they build their little family; sam, dean, castiel, the hybrids, whomever of their allies that are alive at this point.

castiel can heal sam and dean’s wounds but they are never completely gone; they leave scars and phantom pains. the brothers have SO many scars over the years. dean flaunts them to impress people because he likes the questions and the fearful admiration, the attention and the nods of approval. sam hides them.

when dean is in a bad mood or needs to get his mind off of things, sam just drops something like ‘i don’t get the deal with led zeppelin. one of the most overrated bands of all time’ and dean will go OFF every single time about the entire led zeppelin history, their discography and how they’ve shaped rock music. this will go on for hours and sam will zone out after 1 minute. but dean rants nonsensically the entire drive and it does get him to think about something else for a little bit. they stop at a motel and dean is STILL ranting while brushing his teeth. stops when going to sleep but without fail picks up where he left off the morning after and is so into it he doesn’t notice sam not paying attention at all. we could see this once in s1 when they’re searching for john, another in s3 when dean is anxious about his deal coming to an end and then again in a later season, when sam doesn’t remember to ask/doesn’t have the patience or mental capability, so they’ll sit there in tense silence, showing how much they’ve changed.

---> i can see this SO clearly in my head, how they’ll get in the car and we, the audience, will recognize the camera angle, the same lines and dean’s grumpy mood, and we’ll anticipate what comes next. but sam isn’t that kid anymore and he’s not peeking at dean to gauge what his mood is and how much of a shit eating grin he should wear when being an annoying little brother to cheer dean up. now he’s looking out the window, leaned back, they’re not looking at each other. this shot is a minute or two long, uninterrupted. dean turns on music but neither are singing along or doing anything to lighten the mood. 

s1-5: sam gets hooked on demon blood, dean has an alcohol problem. when sam goes through withdrawals, dean decides to quit drinking and joins him because he wants to be supportive, and he realizes that when he drinks two beers for breakfast there’s a problem

s6-10: sam takes painkillers, anti depressants and anti psyhosis meds to numb himself from the phantom pains and reduce post-cage effects. dean started drinking again after sam jumped and still does, but started smoking in addition because he still drives a lot and doesn’t want to die in something as pathetic as a car crash. 

there a scene in an episode in the first half of s8, when sam has decided to stay with dean instead of amelia, and dean has rejected benny in favor of sam, and then the brothers sit in a couch watching tv while drinking beer and neither of them look particularly happy about it - that’s how their relationship is a lot of the time. they know they’re fucked up and neither of them will ever be truly happy when the other’s around, but they owe each other so much and they don’t have to explain themselves to each other the way they do to others. they know each other so well, each other’s traumas and the things they’ve done, it feels fake and exhausting to try to be something other than the veteran hunters they are. misery loves company; they are miserable together but would be far more miserable apart and living a normal life. they do love each other, but neither of them are particularly happy as the show progresses. family is hell and so is the lack of it. 

OK OK i mentioned it in part one, how i had my own very specific idea about how jack should come to be and here it is. long winded but (might just write a damn fic): 

after lucifer was cast back into the cage, he is stronger than he has been in a long time (being in his true vessel helped him stretched muscles he forgot he had. and fresh air.) sam is pulled out of the cage and it leaves a rift in the magic and chains - the binding is weaker and lucifer must act fast to get out before it heals. the cage is still strong enough to hold two archangels, so lucifer has to become weaker somehow to slip out through the cracks. he can’t get out of the cage, but souls can come in. demons bring themselves and human souls as tools for lucifer to use. there’s not much he can do here - consuming them, eating them, touching them, dissecting them doesn’t give him what he wants

eventually lucifer realizes he must do like azazel and create something new of two halves, like when he created demons. he begins melding his archangel grace with a human soul. he tries with demons, but his archangel grace automatically purifies them and leaves them too weak. he must try with a human soul who is good. he finds the soul of kelly kline, who sold her soul to save a loved one. with her, the merging, works. 

he has another self, a twin, a son, who’s half human and half archangel. half lucifer. the old lucifer will die but that’s ok, his desires, presence and self will live on in his new creation. the new lucifer barely makes it out of the cage, only able to due to its human side. on earth it creates a body for itself and takes shape, no longer a form of pure power and energy akin to the sun itself but now a person, reminiscent of kelly kline on earth and lucifer in heaven. they name themselves jack. jack searches for familiarity and finds it in sam, their old self’s perfect tool and another hybrid. jack finds a mentor in castiel, a younger brother and fellow angel with human elements. they do not find anything in dean, the key to his former self’s doom.

jack’s powers: their powers are like and unlike the angels because he is half archangel. jack has wings but sometimes they don’t work, or they’ll end up somewhere else entirely. their body is their own, not a vessel, so jack can’t possess people. doesn’t talk but people “know” what they’re saying or want because jack emits their emotions and thoughts to people they’re talking to like a radio tower. jack can also have this empathic connection and communication with animals. his mood affects the weather. immortal. reads minds. can remove a soul from a body and send it to heaven/hell by touching it, with practice they don’t need to touch a body. 

other stuff about jack: the human/archangel nature means jack only need sleep and food once a week or so. eats only nougat and raw meat. because jack is a kid they nap a lot. levitates when sleeping. never blinks, stares intensely at everything. their eye colour changes based on their mood. eyes glow in the dark. normal humans who look at jack for too long experience memory loss, fainting spells or migraines and eye contact for more than 10 seconds give vivid hallucinations of their worst nightmares. always barefoot, often floats like 10 cm off the ground because they find it more enjoyable than walking. wears the wildest clothes they can find, nothing matches and nothing is weather appropriate

i have a very specific image of jack in my mind; they look like delirium from the sandman comics with the hair that looks like it’s underwater and the fishes floating around their head, here and here are examples. in live action this would look not good or maybe even ridiculous for sure but in animation... endless potential for angels and monsters to have super interesting designs sigh

castiel’s arc should end with him going from blind soldier, to the unwilling ruler of heaven, finding a place on earth with sam and dean, becoming closer with humanity and eventually a father of three (the hybrids). 

[haloud]

michael guerin loves alex manes

So there’s been a narrative within the fandom ever since the s1 hiatus that Michael hasn’t been shown to love Alex like Alex loves him, that Michael never does anything for Alex, that Michael never makes himself available. I couldn’t disagree more. So here’s a list from season 1.

Michael:

Has a picture of them together and keeps it in a special box along with pictures of his family and has for 10 years

Kisses him at the reunion (after asking if Alex wants him to leave and giving him a chance to say no to the kiss.)

Gives him massive puppy eyes across a crowded bar after Isobel asks him if there’s anyone he would sacrifice everything for, which Alex sees, acknowledges with a lingering glance, then deliberately looks away.

“For me, nothing’s changed” “I never look away, not really”

Kisses him again

Literally everything about their scene in bed in 1x03, from the way he says “you stayed” to the way his mouth opens under Alex’s thumb to the reverent way he touches his leg

Wants his sister to know he and Alex are together but honors Alex’s refusal even though he’s hurt by it

Says he’d hate Max for sending Alex away in a direct comparison to Max’s fury at him and Isobel sending Liz away (aka saying he loves Alex the same way Max loves Liz)

At prom, he breaks up Alex’s fight with Kyle and, eyes only for Alex, tenderly asks if he’s okay

Opens up to Alex about how music makes him feel—the only person Michael ever seems to open up to about this part of himself

Kisses him in the UFO Emporium

“[I’ve never done this] with anyone I’ve liked as much as I like you”

Bodily defends Alex from a hammer-wielding Jesse and ends up permanently (or whatever -_-) injured from it

Tries to approach Alex in the bar in 1x09 after Alex hasn’t spoken to him for almost two months with no explanation. Tries a second time to talk to him/get him to open up until Alex shuts him down.

He says yes when Alex says Michael loved him for a long time

“We just connected like something—” “Cosmic.”

Opens up to Alex about his profoundly abusive childhood. Alex is the first person Michael is shown to trust with this part of himself in present day.

As soon as knowing about aliens doesn’t send Alex running screaming, Michael shows him his lab and everything he’s been working on even though an episode ago he was telling Liz not to touch it with Isobel’s life on the line.

“If anyone’s going to destroy me, it might as well be you.”

“Alex was the first person to make me feel like there was a place for me here.”

Loves Alex so much he leaves the mother he’s been searching for his entire life instead of staying to die beside her because Alex wouldn’t leave him otherwise.

“I love him, I probably always will.” <- the only time either of them has used love in the present tense about the other

So yeah, that’s a substantial but probably not comprehensive list of the ways Michael loves Alex and expresses it. Michael is not always nice; he’s mean when he gets defensive, and he gets defensive a lot. But throughout season 1 he also regularly puts himself out there for Alex while still respecting his space whenever Alex asks for it (which happens at least three times that I can think of—after the reunion, until Alex comes to him at the end of 1x02; after the drive in all the way until 1x09; and after the bar in 1x09 until, again, Alex changes his mind).

I’d also like to address a specific criticism I’ve seen about Michael’s feelings for Alex. No, Michael doesn’t bring up Alex to other people; but Alex specifically says he doesn’t want Isobel to know about them in 1x03 and never expresses a change of heart with regards to that. Michael talking about his relationship with Alex would be against his wishes and, frankly, really out of line and a denial of Alex’s agency. He’s not perfectly gracious about it, but it’s something that hurts him. He wants their relationship to be known, and Alex doesn’t until much, much later. As for Michael not defending Alex verbally…at what point does Alex require that verbal defense? No one ever talks bad about Alex to Michael! The only times Michael is there when Alex is under attack are at prom—and Michael intervenes—and in the shed—and Michael throws himself at Jesse screaming “don’t touch him.” Asking that Michael give the same verbal defense of Alex as Alex does for him is such a false equivalency, because their circumstances aren’t the same. It’s like saying “well if Alex really loved Michael he would tell someone that he’d hate them if they made Michael leave him.”

In season 2, Michael is pushing everyone away. He feels poisoned by hope, and explicitly, Alex represents hope in better things to Michael. Michael absolutely pushes Alex away in season 2. He’s not particularly kind about it. Especially in 2x02. But in 2x01 when he says that he doesn’t think they’re good for each other, he includes his own fault in that--he admits that he thinks he hasn’t been good for Alex either. And furthermore, the thing he says that people hate? “All our years of this, I’ve never said no to you. You come and you go and I go where you put me. This is me saying no.” Is also Michael admitting his own fault. It’s not an entirely accurate statement--we know of one instance and I think we can safely infer others where Michael said no with his actions if not his words--but it is him acknowledging that his own passivity in their relationship was half the problem and him setting a boundary to break that cycle. 

I think most malex fans were dissatisfied in various ways by season 2, and I think that inconsistencies and skewed priorities in the writing damaged the arcs and characterizations of just about every character, michael and alex very much included. But I think it’s disingenuous not to accept that the show wants us to believe, and therefore will proceed with this dynamic at the base, that both michael and alex contributed equally to the ways their relationship fell apart and hurt the other. With both of them having such a long history of trauma, with both of them having so few examples of healthy relationships to draw on in their lives, it’s not surprising things went like they did.

We end the season on can we both stop keeping score. I think fandom should take a hint from that. This list isn’t meant to be Michael’s scorecard, but merely a refutation of the idea that Michael’s love for Alex is an informed attribute. The idea that Michael hasn’t been shown to love Alex so deeply that it’s a part of who he is…that the foundation hasn’t been laid…it isn’t supported by canon. He loves him a lot. He loves him to distraction, to the point of agony, to the point of peace. Even after everything in season 2, he drops everything and makes a bomb that he thinks could wipe out his species to save Alex. Michael Guerin loves Alex Manes.

But that doesn’t mean that you as a fan have to keep shipping them. Even if they’re what got you into the show. Even if you think they’re going to be endgame. Even if you think they’re the only way you’re going to get eyes on your fanwork. If you hate half the ship, I encourage you to find a ship that makes you happier instead of subjecting yourself to a character you can’t stand. Also, if you’re going to write vent fic about how insufferable you find a certain character and how much you want them to Pay for their Crimes, it’s polite to tag it thusly.