#is really throwing me off
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i'll be honest the devs going on the internet to retroactively fill in the blanks is kinda giving "dumbledore is gay actually"
#this is not me coming for a specific person just the overarching trend of going online and typing out character analyses#bc it wasnt made clear in game#is really throwing me off#this is specifically about the creators of a game btw not fans!#if you as the creator of a game need to go online and explain what your intentions were with a character or with a scene then#you didnt write it well#like. i like kirby as much as the next varric lover but her saying 'ive always seen him as demisexual' and#that having to be the explanation for the lackluster romance is not it :///#OR. god. epler saying 'i thought it was clear that the crows we saw were intended to be the idealists of the crows'#maybe put that in the game then? rather than pulling a jkr and saying that in an ama#wheres the nuance wheres the flavour#da#datv#nett rambles#nett plays datv#dragon age ama#dragon age#dragon age the veilguard#and i know kirby doesnt work there anymore im just pointing out the broader problem#datv critical
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even dogs pass the mirror test
#hello again everyone. how's it going#isat loop#in stars and time#isat fanart#in stars and time fanart#isat#lucabyteart#isat spoilers#so. had this idea Before getting my hands on the artbook and being validated. literally have a voice note from 4:30am on the 8th where#i frantically noted down this just horrid horrid horrid caption because i'd been musing on the sasasap Dress line all day i suppose#just kind of rotating in my brain the way any kind of first time trying on new clothes for them would be .#just absolutely mental breakdown material and not one i think would be recovered from quickly. they hate being in their own skin#like. a lot? like a lot. the collateral of any kind of transfemme read was barely in my mind until it ended up relevant again while i was#actively working on this. because christ that's a bad combo. 2x different forms of body dysphoria in one. maybe even 3x somehow#plus any scenario where they get clothes is... likely gifted. something they react viciously negatively to in game and i doubt#would improve thereafter. just a veritable katamari of disgust and self-loathing#like i was mostly just thinking abt how a lot of our collective depictions of loop being alienated from their body are rather abstract#in a body horror way mostly. on account of loop being more of a metaphor than a person half the time. so i think i wanted to depict#something closer to just. a human level of body dysphoria. no focus on the whole duplicate thing just... raw disgust for the self#but with the addition of recent discussion and playing ball more with the she/her loop and transfem loop angle...#scenario of leaning into femininity to try throw off suspicion on who they are PLUS realising they might want that PLUS the party#trying to use this to bond with them PLUS body dysphoria PLUS new!gender dysphoria PLUS the usual revulsion for wanting and desire#like. that is a catastrophic combination . not coming out of that one without it getting worse for a few weeks thereafter#that's a real lash out at everyone around them and then recede in shame type breakdown. which im sure looks interesting from#the party's pov because jesus christ that touched a nerve something awful (<- they only have half the context AT BEST)#. so . there's your free scenario to ponder on if you'd want to. seeing as ive done a picture without a shitload of words on it for once#ALSO don't get smart with me in the tags about the mirror test being an absolutely ass test in most regards re: self-awareness#or that things like minnows pass it. i'm a fellow pedant dont worry. it's just that minnow doesn't really have the same ring as dog yknow?#this is supposed to be like an absolutely excruciatingly self loathing thought spoken aloud of a caption. it's pithy and cruel on purpose#and more than a little inspired by (reblogged yesterday) liminal space's 'there is no other dog. it's just you'
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I loved your drawing(and I love your style in general) with Leia in your recent post! If/when you have time can we see more of her in your style? I get so happy whenever I actually see people mention/talk about her and she’s not just forgotten because we didn’t get to see much of her. 😭
thank you! 💙💙💙 Leia/Leah/Lea/whatever is fascinating to me. she is the ultimate unknown. what was she like? how involved (or even aware of any details of the invasion) was she? Silver's basically a physical carbon copy of his biodad, so what did he get from her? like, I understand why the two of them kind of have to stay as these super vague and mysterious figures -- the whole point of them is that their story ended 400+ years ago and they're not really relevant anymore (and. well. the more that gets explained about them, the less that can just kinda be handwaved as "oh the politics were Very Messy") (we can sit here and theorize all day but let us acknowledge that, ultimately, canon gave us almost nothing about them post-Meleanor and we'd just be making things up). I do still wonder about her though! RIP Lea, we never knew you and we probably never will.
actually you know what, as long as we're here, I think I WILL go ahead and just make some stuff up about what Silver might've inherited from her instead.
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 part 13 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 part 13 spoilers#there may be answers somewhere that i just forgot about so uhhh if so#whoops ( ᐛ )#having one of those art days where chances are good i'm just gonna wake up and throw this post out the window so be warned#but yeah idk. i've talked before about the parallels between silver and dawnatello and how i see him as basically bad end silver#he chose the easy option that let him stay loyal and fulfill the obligation he felt to his adoptive family#he knew it wasn't right and that he was being manipulated but he went along with it anyway until it was too late#i think he ultimately had a good heart but my man folded under the slightest bit of social pressure like a wet mcmuffin#so while i'm continuing to make things up out of whole cloth i wanna say that by contrast#lea never had a chance to do shit but if she had i like to think she would've had a spine like galvanized steel#like just personally i don't think she knew much about what the silver owls were actually doing#seriously does henrik seem like the kind of person who would tell her shit about anything#i think he basically took advantage of their dad's failing health to go off and be a warmonger#and if he thought about lea at all it was to be like :) you stay here and do boring domestic princess stuff#while i tell your husband to Do It For Her#i mean this is 100% me writing baseless fanfic here#i just think it'd be fun if the part of silver that was IMMEDIATELY like 'actually no. we aren't doing this.' might've come from her#she just never got a chance to show it#(it didn't seem to come from the knight is all i'm saying)#lilia might've given silver a billion complexes but at least he raised him to do the right thing#man someone left a reply or reblog on an older post and i cannot find it so i apologize for the lack of credit BUT they pointed out#that one of the big differences between silver and the knight is that the knight's family did not really seem to like him very much and lik#yeah i think so. lea might've been the exception there for him.#rip ma'am we'll never know if you deserved better or not
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can’t help but think of how, if we choose to go by sirius’ characterisation as a private, arrogant teen who only lets a select few into his circle, sirius’ post-azkaban life just have been such an utterly humiliating experience for him.
especially OoTP. when he has all these near strangers in his childhood house, that he hated and loved and ran away from and couldn’t ever escape. if he spent his entire pre-azkaban existence building a cold and aloof persona, not letting people know what his home life had been like, then to have all of these people get a front row seat to it because of kreacher and portrait walburga’s shenanigans must have been near unbearable. to have the entire order, including snape whom he disliked and mistrusted, hear the kinds of names he’s being called.
not only does he have to deal with the retraumatisation of his childhood, but also the fact that he’s flayed open for everyone to see. it’s not only his freedom, innocence, dignity that has been snatched from him but his privacy also. it’s such a cruel thing to experience, on top of everything else.
to have literal children, his godson who he has been kept away from all this while, whom he presumably wants to be able to look up to him, to have him see into the deepest parts of his soul. to have to be so weak in front of him. not only is he subjected to such vileness but he also cannot do anything about it.
sirius has not had a moment of peace in all the time we knew him. it is indignity upon indignity that is heaped onto him. every other character has gotten a moment of respite but him. it fully breaks my heart.
#sirius black#i am in the mood to sob tonight clearly#i just#was reading a fic#where it recounted walburga ad kreacher’s screams and taunts#and it suddenly hit me how humiliating they are?#like#even if it’s an inanimate object and a house elf#to be called an embarrassment and shame of my flesh and filth#by the only remaining members of your family#and to have it be traced back to your family#to know that your mother was alive but did not care that u were in azkaban#and that everyone else knows it too now#to walk around in every corner of your childhood house and be able to see exactly how u grew up#no boundaries no limits#to have other people keep touching parts of your family with the audacity to throw them out#and move it around#to call your home names#i just. cannot imagine.#the level of helplessness he was operating with#is it really any wonder he was the way he was#hell. he was actually so much better than he should’ve been#lesser men would’ve been catatonic or going off on a rage fuelled warpath#it’s so embarrassing to have your parent even correct u in front of friends sometimes#and to hear all this abuse. shouted at you.#and not one person ever stands up for him#or shows him any empathy#i’m actually amazed that even after all these years i’m able to find new tragedies in sirius life#HAS THAT MAN NOT BEEN THROUGH ENOUGH#pen’s notes
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i think every company that tried to go all in on the AI tech craze owes us all reparations for subjecting us to the most insufferable onslaught of performative advertising that's ever been witnessed on this earth
#i actually feel a level of unspeakable hostility when i see an ad for anything AI related#and it's not just because of the ethics of it / environmental impacts etc#it's the fact that it's been injected into EVERYTHING#even places where it really doesn't serve ANY functional or practical purpose#having to hear techbros preach AI at you is as enjoyable as having a toddler throw up on you as you're taking off on a 12 hour flight#i watch youtube on my ps4 and thus get ads and every second or third is some ai garbage trying to entice me to be meaninglessly lazier
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You could say I was horsing around.
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#oh the uncanny effect is strong with this one#maybe it's the fact that horse heads are long and narrow so their facial proportions don't change much#when switching from canine to equine#but instead of a familiar snout they get a blunt herbivore muzzle and it's really throwing me off#also poor Machete what did they do to your ears! your big satellite dish ears#shrunken#ooh Vasco is looking extra golden and glimmery#I can imagine him looking downright glorious when sun hits him just right#thank you! always lovely seeing your art of them#gift art#kuroikamome#Vasco#Machete#own characters#getting Bojack Horseman flashbacks
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"He started off really angry but I've been giving him lots of love and now he's a big ol' softy."
Jack, Mass Effect 3
#mass effect 3#trigger warning: flashing#jack#jack subject zero#commander shepard#eezo the varren#that's what you get for doing the fake throw lol#the way shep just ~~fly-flops~~ into the air gets me every time!#also i love how eezo isn't the only one to start off really angry but to be changed by love 🤗#ais plays mass effect#this is my game tag#ageless aislynn
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Shen Yuan getting transported into pidw isn't "the system punishing him for being a lazy internet hater," but instead representative of "step 1 of the creative process: getting so mad at something you decide to go write your own fucking book" in this essay I will
#svsss#scum villian self saving system#shen qingqiu#shen yuan#the fact that people think scum villain#-a series that examines and criticizes common tropes in fiction-#is somehow against criticism or being a little hater is wild to me#especially since shen qingqiu never gets punished for being a hater#heck- he's still a little hater by the end of the series#he mostly gets punished for treating life like a play and like he and the people around him are characters#(or in other words- he suffers for denying his own wants and emotions and his own sense of empathy)#I think some of y'all underestimate how much writing/art is inspired by creaters being little haters#like example off the top of my head-#the author of Iron Widow has been pretty vocal about the book being inspired by their hatred of Darling in the Franxx#I think my interpretation of Shen Yuan's transmigration is also supported by the fact that this series is an examines writing processes#side note- though i understand why people say Shen Yuan is lazy and think its a valid take it still doesnt sit right with me#i am probably biased because my own experiences with chronic pain and depression and isolation#but ya- i dont think Shen Yuan is lazy so much as he is deeply lonely and feels purposeless after denying parts of himself for 20ish years#like yall remember the online fandom boom from covid right?#being stuck completely alone in bed while feeling like shit for 20 days straight does shit to your brain#the fact that no one came to check on him + he wasn't exactly upset about leaving anyone behind supports the isolation interpretation too#+in the skinner demon arc he describes his life of being a faker/inability to stop being a faker now that he's Shen Qingqiu#as “so bland he's tempted to throw salt on himself” and “all he could do is lay around and wait for death” (<-paraphrasing)#bro wants to be doing stuff but is stuck in paralysis from repeatedly following scrips made by other people#another point on “Shen Yuan isn’t lazy” is just the sheer amount of studying that man does#also he did graduate college- how lazy can he really be#he doesnt know what hes doing but he at least tries to actively train his students#and he actually works on improving his own cultivation + spends quite a bit of time preping the mushroom body thing#+he's experiencing bouts of debilitating chronic pain throughout all this#but ya tldr: Shen Yuan's transmigration is an encouragement to write and not a punishment and also i dont think its fair to call him lazy
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TELEMACHUS AND ANTINOUS. FINALLY
#throwing a tiny bit of (NOT FULLY THOUGHT OUT AND VERY MUCH A WIP) info about them here for u guys#i was trying to figure out what the fuck antinous could do in this au#and then i was like oh wait monster hunter. obviously#so hes a monster hunter lol#<- this is actually sorta funny because the temporary odysseus lore i have is that he used to be a monster hunter at one point#and then he got bit on the job or something lol#aughhh this is very embarassing to admit but this whole au in my head is very heavily inspired by the danganronpa fic out for blood#so i will admit. i just stole hajimes backstory from that fic#btw you guys should read that fic. even if youre not into danganronpa it doesnt really rely on canon at ALL and its very good#anyways as a temporary thing i dont really think borrowing that matters#anyways monster hunter antinous just seems like the natural conclusion here idk idk#i dont really have a solid story in mind in general so im not worrying about how different aspects interact atm#anyways telemachus thoughts now#hes obviously still penelope and odys kid so. funny vampire/werewolf hybrid thing lets talk about that#so i imagine he takes after odysseus in MOST things. he is for all intents and purposes mostly just a werewolf#but ahh. ok i dont know werewolf lore so im gonna explain it#(its very much again just based on one really good danganronpa fic i read)#i think when turned its sort of like. a blackout blind rage. very little complex thought involved. just kill and maim etc#<- not getting too into it bc of tag limits. lmk if you want me to ramble about how werewolves in this au work though#anyways i think since telemachus isnt a full werewolf this doesnt fully apply to him#he may or may not have violent instincts but he could probably resist them and hes at least semi-aware when turned#anyways i think penelope dresses him. thats why hes so fancy. very much giving off heavy vampire energy despite barely being one#is he immortal* like a vampire? we dont know and were not gonna test it hopefully!#also he could probably drink blood he doesnt HAVE to though and he doesnt like the taste really. penelope does not get it </3#ok done rambling in the tags now time for art tags#doodles#epic the musical#epic monster au#antinous#telemachus
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"Who am I if I don't have what it takes?"
OG post haha
#i was really mad at myself for only thinking of adding lyrics from Surface Pressure AFTER I had already posted the original drawing lol#was just going to repost it with the lines but thought this would be a cooler thing to do#i wish now more than ever that i was a better artist than i am. because I'm dying to make a Pepper Jack animatic haha#i can see it in my mind... the scenes keep playing in my head... one day. but not today unfortunately#i honestly cannot stress how Pepper Jack core Surface Pressure is. it's so him u guise. it's him and his struggles#in any case. can't wait to tell you all who's responsible for this lol. you'll love him. hate him. you'll love to hate him#cookie run kingdom#burning spice cookie#golden cheese cookie#burningcheese#goldenspice#pepper jack cookie#i know BS and GC aren't in there but..... this is their son. it's implied. there I win#come on throw me a bone. this is the proudest I've been of a drawing. let me show off haha. it'll wear off soon enough
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Wind and Spirit have a bad time in the Sacred Realm!
It's my Spirit Tracks x LU fic / concept / thing! There are a couple written scenes which can be read on AO3! This is one of them and can be read [here!]. I don't see myself continuing this project, but even so, I want to say some thank yous (under the read more)!
The animatic has no audio, but if it did, it would be Robot Soldiers from Castle in the Sky.
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The project isn't something I think I'll be finishing, but that said, it's been fun to work on.
I know it's just a silly unfinished fic and some art and maybe I'll come back to it, however, I am just a little guy with so much gratitude! It meant so much to me to be so welcomed by the LU fandom when I initially posted that Spirit Tracks LU art compilation in 2021. (this one!) The art and fic couldn't have been made without the incredible art, writing, support, and headcanon brainstorming from the people around me and the inspiration I found in their works and ideas.
Thank you to everyone who's left comments and kind tags!
Thank you to @esthelle-wanders for the excited comments and support over the years.
Thank you to @snowylynxx for her Spirit Tracks LU comics which gave me so much motivation and whose Spirit design I've been borrowing.
To @theegh0st. I adore your art! A frame from the pump trolley animation has been your header for so long and it's so fun to see it when visiting your blog. It's been an honor!
And thank you so much to Wicked (@spirit-tracks) and Train (@fuckit-hero-of-trains) for 1) being unhinged in the best possible way about Spirit Tracks and 2) for your incredible writing <3
If you like Spirit in LU fics, then I really recommend Keeping Track of the Little Things by wickedcriminal. Wicked started a headcanon post about Spirit [here], it got picked up and added to, I made some art, and Wicked made a fic. Spirit worrying about his place in the group and stressing about time management is a headcanon I'm fond of. Worrying about schedules is something Time can probably relate on, and so it's something I wanted to include for them to connect over in a moment of downtime. Though the setting and stakes are different, Wicked has already written something similar to how I imagine the scene would play out, and it's absolutely wonderful.
!!! The project meant so much at the time! Some of the work I did on the lore is so cool!!! There's a bit of lore about the Triforce that was given in OoT which we hadn't seen happen in a game, but that I wanted for the Spirit Tracks fic, so I plotted it out. So then (spoilers for Echoes of Wisdom) to see it in Echoes was really cool!!!! It was really validating that, yeah I read that right and executed it how it was meant to! >:) There's other stuff too, but anyways aaaa
I just don't see myself completing it, though. It feels kind of bad to give it away but I also need to be free of it. It's been nearly four years... which is wild!
Thank you again for reading and for the support and enthusiasm up to now. It means a lot to know there were people invested in a story I made. It's small and fragmented, but still. Thank you.
(maybe maybe maybe I'll draw a couple more scenes as I have been, but for the fic, I am releasing writing while also saying it's going to be unfinished and discontinued asjdsahdgs sorry 'xD is that a thing people can do? I think the scenes are cool! That's just,,, all I'm able to write I think. Can people post just- isolated scenes? ,,,, That's definitely a thing. I still felt like I should say something. ANYWAYS <3 See ya!)
#linked universe#lu spirit#lu wind#lu fic#animatic#04092022#predating totk and eow with this one!!! ouph 'xD#long post#esthelle!!! thank you for your patience! TAT I got really nervous about posting this. it's been ready for months#ah man... here it is though!#I had fun throwing Legend off a moving train#that's the chapter before this one#*does a sick backflip off the edge of the platform like Link#*silly yelling as I fall#the fic has a whole outline. it's just been four years and I don't really have the same passion for it. I'm not really a writer#I gotta like- officially- put a pin in it. I'm free I'm free let me free asjhfgsjdfs#still I'm so so so grateful for those who inspired that passion anyways xD it was a good time!#thank you for being nice to me then and still
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cycle knots
#i've had all of these sitting around for a while and haven't felt like posting them#but since i don't have time to draw anything new right now i figured i might as well#i've been drawing a lot of these textpost doodle thingies for psychonauts and it's mostly because normally i would make textpost edits#with talk sprites and stuff. but psychonauts doesn't have those and for some reason i'm super resistant to making them with screenshots so.#psychonauts#psychonauts 2#uhhh am i tagging all these guys. i guess i am#otto mentallis#ford cruller#compton boole#cassie o'pia#bob zanotto#razputin aquato#norma natividad#lili zanotto#chloe barge#sam boole#putting these all together really makes it obvious how differently i color raz every time i draw him huh.#for some reason his color scheme is just hard for me to figure out. the bright yellow skin throws me off#my art
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Seeing all these other pwASPD talk about how they hate socializing because they don't care about people's drama and they think it's all stupid is so interesting to me. I also dislike socializing, but like I DO wanna hear the drama. It has to be interesting, but I like sitting back and listening to these crazy-ass stories. It's entertaining as hell, and also saves me from the agony of trying to come up with a non-canned response for small talk.
#there will definitely be times i just do not vibe with someone's drama and get really really bored listening to them#but generally the people who give me shit drama are people i don't really like. and people i don't like are generally not close enough to-#-share that drama. so 🤷♂️ it's whatever#also when someone starts talking about drama and i realize midway through that they're the problem 😭#that's more funny than anything though#it's tricky to try to predict the right response to let them know that while also not coming off as mean#but yk you can wish-wash around it and sugarcoat it and throw in a lot of 'kindas' and 'a littles' and 'maybes' and that helps a lot#man i love being able to play with my words to do that#bitches love me for my amorphous image and ability to perfectly adapt to their vibes and visions#slash silly but also slash srs#ANYWAY#aspd#antisocial personality disorder#antisocial pd#actually antisocial#actually aspd#< i'm using these for this idc. i got diagnosed i'm allowed ‼️‼️#tag rambles
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love thinking about the underworld siblings just being absolute fucking creatures. they stare at you too long after a conversation has ended and quickly look away if you notice and look back. they sit catatonic on the floor of a pitch black room and get mildly annoyed when someone turns the lights on. they get each other in a distinct way that no one else ever really could and hold hands creepily like the twins in the shining. nico notices the tiny little things of another person's life and when they ask him How he knows he says "the ghosts in your walls told me" (it's a joke and no one laughs). hazel has a fun night on the town with friends when suddenly she lays her fingertips to the earth and says "oh... someone was murdered here in 1998" and the mood is killed instantly. they have a shared macabre that looms over others like the presence of an urn in the corner of a room. percy/frank/will/jason/reyna are used to it but even they get caught off guard by their behavior sometimes. they need to be Weird in a way that makes other people uncomfortable
#there are several moments in hoo where others regard hazel like “pluto kid? undead girl? but she's so bright and full of life”#meanwhile her internal monologues are like 'I should be dead. I'm so bad at everything. I ruin everything I touch. the past and the present#are demanding too much and the ghosts of asphodel are still inside of me' which is so funny#and I think that Has to manifest externally in some peculiar behaviors that really throw people off sometimes#and then nico is just nico. not a goth ball of death but an ostracized creature who doesn't quite grasp how to operate among the living#nico di angelo#hazel levesque#frank zhang#will solace#jason grace#reyna avila ramirez arellano#percy jackson and the olympians#riordanverse#pjo hoo toa tsats#rick riordan#the sun and the star#heroes of olympus#baye.txt#underworld siblings
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(xavier ramble that i posted on discord and now u get to read here <3)
so. my main faves are xavier (main), rafayel, and caleb. and i was thinking... what's pulling me to xavier over the other two? (especially caleb LMAO) i feel like i'd commonly go with the outspoken clingy dramatic boys (raf) or the 'childhood best friend' archetype (caleb) but something about xavier captivated me.
when i first started looking to him, i felt like there was waaay more than meets the eye for his character, and that's intentional, since he wants to live a quiet life, but has so much history behind him.
aside from differences in personalities and preferences (i love raf but irl im not a sea or seafood person, and i love caleb but.. but nothing. xavier just pulls me in more LMAO), xavier to me truly has that sneak attack for your heart.
he's awkward, and silly, and insanely powerful on the battlefield. he loves reading comics, playing video games, and being delusional about his cooking skills. he's a rock that you can always depend upon in a quiet life. he's cheeky and gets easily jealous, but would much rather pout and be sulky than direct that to you. its adorable. as xavier and caleb are jokingly deemed the 'possessive' duo, caleb's possessiveness to me could go left (affectionate, i know why), whereas i feel as though xavier's stems from just wanting to capitalize on your attention. he has someone in his life that he cares deeply about, its only natural for him to be a little clingy about it.
on top of the fact that he's just a good friend in of itself, keeping an eye on you and making sure you take care of yourself without crossing a boundary. he loves being around you so much so that he admires the person you are, and wants to be that type of person himself. he relishes in being recognized by you in a world where he's only ever known as an entity to be utilized, rather than a person who has feelings and passions.
'this is the first time someone's asked me to play support' he says, which sounds normal at face value, but its definitely something to be unpacked: he's not used to being the person that supports, he's used to being the leader, the strong hunter that needs no one to finish the job, the crown prince that's above all else, the leader of the backtrackers, the elusive lumiere… now he just gets to be xavier that supports his friends. he thinks of himself as a nobody, someone who used to be 'everything', not out of personhood, but out of necessity. being able to be seen by someone he loves despite everything is by far the greatest joy in life he could ever have. and i love him SOOOO MUCH FOR IT!! im sure all of the lads love mc and they make their life better by being in it, but for me, there's something so comforting and lovely about xavier growing into a person he wants to be because someone he loves makes him want to figure out who he is for himself. because the person that loves him will love him at his core regardless of who he decides to be. thats why he gets jealous because mc looks to lumiere, and im sure she's picked up on that too. he loathes the idea that she loves someone that isnt him. obviously, lumiere IS him, but it's not 'him' in the sense that it's a persona, an idea, a hero. xavier… simply thinks of himself as a man who quietly lives in his apartment and goes to work like everyone else. he doesnt have a tether to anything other than just wanting to live life the way he wants to, after living so many lives that were not given by choice. at least… not until mc.
but as an addendum to this rambling, he's just!!! great and i love his personal journey and how it intertwines with mc at the core of it. im happy he gets to be in a world where he can live a quiet life!! and his joy is by far something that leads me to him over the other lads.
-- (i love him in his entirety and i think i havent found that spark with the other lads yet. caleb is a close second though, his relationship with mc is so silly and they have such a sweet bond that im sure he cherishes. his devotion, affection, and love languages are to die for.
but i think xavier's way of being there for you and picking up the cracks when you cant or before you even realize appeals to me more. thinking about precious bonfire clips i saw and how he took every opportunity to stay by and support mc and how he looked after her, made sure she was having fun, and allowed her to use him as a scapegoat so that she didn't get burnt out or the call where he saw she was alone at a team building thing at the bar and offered to leave with her since she wasnt really keen on hanging out to begin with he's just. so sweet. hes always thinking about the small things and wants his favorite person to be happy because it makes him happy :> this doesnt even go into the smaller nuances or traits that i love about him. maybe i'll do a post about it or just how personality wise i feel like if i were to bond with anyone irl xavier would be #1 in a landslide.)
#i havent read everything or experienced all of his stuff yet#and ive explored more since i wrote this#but i really wanted to throw this out there because oough i see people talking about mischaracterizing him often. he deserves so much!!!#xavier lads#xavier love and deepspace#love and deepspace#sym.txt#xavier#theres so many small things in the things he says that catch me off guard or allow me to put two and two together when he says it.#or how in Inflorescence Imprints he's fine with the area being turned into a park. and as he spoke more it was apparent to me#that OF COURSE he's used to this shit. hes had to move so much + lived so long he's accustomed to change. and then he MENTIONS IT LATER.#but acknowledges and gives mc space to grieve it too because he knows she's sad about the flowers. and then offers to move them with her#to a more permanent place. OUUGH this is already long bye lmao#need to be sedated because i am NOT normal about this man
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you bought your bf coffee! you can either:
a. hand it to him normally
b. pretend to drop it to make him panic but you actually do drop it and now you have to buy another one
yeah this is meant to pair with the new trained aki 3 star card but i was lazy to do it properly
#yk smth that really throws me off is akis arm#it makes the drawing look like a first person shooter#dont mind the bad anatomy. again. sorry goys im no good at it#i like how the bow turned out please look at it lots :3#anything is akikasa if you are willing to put in the effort#pjsk#prsk#pjsk fanart#prsk fa#project sekai#tsukasa tenma#tenma tsukasa#akito shinonome#shinonome akito#akikasa#proseka
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