#is this absolutely cliche and cheesy and corny

[harringtonswriting]

would you maybe do ❝  you’re the only thing that matters anymore.  i can’t eat,  i can’t sleep—  all the goddamn cliches from every stupid movie and song.  you’re all i think about.  i’m useless except when i’m yours.  ❞ with Steve?? Seems very much like a Steve thing to say with a grand romantic gesture maybe 💕

ahhh i definitely agree, this is absolutely a steve thing to say and i hope the romantic gesture is grand enough!! 💕

...

Thunk.

You’re not quite sure what that sound is or where it’s coming from. You look up from your book, one you had been completely engrossed in for the last few hours, but when you don’t see anything moving or notice anything that’s fallen off your bed, you go back to it. You get about half a page of reading in before it comes again.

Thunk. Thunk. Thunk.

You put your bookmark between the pages and close your book before you get up off your bed to search for the sound. It keeps coming, and you realize it’s coming from your window. With all the weird happenings in Hawkins you’re more than a bit wary, because you’ll be damned if you’re going to end up monster food for whatever weird creature of the week is showing up now, so you grab the biggest, heaviest book you own to protect yourself before walking towards your window. You’ve hit someone with it before, completely accidentally, and knew it would be an excellent way to bludgeon something that might attack you.

Except it’s not some weird monster, or a Russian soldier, or even a government goon. No, standing on your lawn at nearly ten o’clock at night, is none other than Steve Harrington. Who’s really the last person you’re expecting to see right now, and the reason you’re spending your Friday night at home with a book.

Okay, well, you can’t put all the blame on him; most of it you put on yourself and the stupid crush you’ve been harbouring on him since you’d made the stupidly wonderful decision to go to Scoops Ahoy last summer, before Starcourt Mall burned down. Unfortunately, as you’d gotten to know Steve and become friends, that stupid crush had only gotten bigger and harder to contain. And when he’d been working in the mall, scooping ice cream with Robin and taking time to chat with you when you stayed way past your break time, he hadn’t been having any luck getting dates—something you were happy about. You felt bad being happy, yes, but him striking out meant you could spend more time with him (and Robin, lovely Robin, who’d very quickly become a staple in your life along with Steve).

But since leaving Scoops Ahoy and starting work at Family Video, Steve’s game had apparently done a 180 and now? Dates all the time, with all the very pretty girls who you’d gone to school with. Never more than once with the same girl, but Steve’s got his groove back and it aches a little, seeing him so excited every time he has a date. But you’re his friend, of course you are, so you push down your own feelings to smile and laugh and encourage him, just the same as Robin and Dustin and the others do, though it’s been getting harder and harder to do lately.

So you’ve been slowly pulling away; you find yourself visiting Family Video far less frequently, usually when Steve isn’t there. You find reasons to skip on group movie nights or hang outs at the Harrington house, and start keeping more to yourself. It’s just until you get over this stupid crush, you tell yourself, and you even tell Robin one night, when you’re on the phone well past midnight and she manages to drag your reasoning for skipping on an outing to Indianapolis with her and Steve.

You’d thought Steve hadn’t noticed. But obviously he had, because here he is. So you put the big book down on your desk before you unlock your window and open it.

A rock goes whizzing by your face, barely missing your cheek, which you were not expecting. You yelp, and that catches Steve’s attention.

“Shit! Sorry! Did I get you?” he yells up at you and you lean out the window to shake your head where he can see you.

“What are you doing here, Steve?” you ask, resting your hands on the window sill so you can lean out a little farther. You can see him shuffling from foot to foot, a big silver boombox resting by his feet. One of his hands is constantly running through his hair, a nervous habit you know he has. His BMW is parked at the end of your driveway.

“I have something I gotta tell you,” he calls up, gesturing with the hand not in his hair. You feel your stomach twist in your abdomen; is he here to break off your friendship? Maybe he knows about your crush and he’s finally had enough. What other reason would he have to be here right now? He probably just finished a date with his latest girl—Heidi? Lauren? You couldn’t remember and honestly, you didn’t want to. Especially not if it was someone Steve was choosing over you. Not that you’d blame him, but still.

“Steve, really, you don’t have to say anything.” Because it’ll hurt more to hear you tell me it’s over before it even began, you want to say. But you don’t. You start to head back in through your window, but Steve shouts and stops you before you can get back in.

“Wait! I do have to say it, because I can’t stand that we haven’t been as close lately. It’s killing me and I can’t keep going like this.” You’re silent, watching him move closer to your house, grabbing the boombox to hold up to his chest. “You’re the only thing that matters anymore. I can’t eat, I can't sleep—all the goddamn cliches from every stupid movie and song. You’re all I think about. I'm useless except when I'm yours.”

Holy shit.

That is definitely not what you’re expecting him to say, and one hand comes up to cover your mouth because that was actually the sweetest thing you think you’ve ever heard him say to you.

That’s when he starts fiddling around with the buttons on the boombox until he gets it to do what he wants, and he cranks the volume dial all the way up before he holds it up over his head. It takes a second before you hear the opening bars of Careless Whisper start to play. He starts swaying back and forth, boombox held high, and god you feel yourself falling even harder because Steve is here, doing this for you, after telling you something that sounds like it would be straight out of one of the romance novels on your shelf.

You get to enjoy the sight in front of you for about a minute before you notice a light turn on and start shining from the house next door.

“Turn the goddamn music down!” You hear your neighbour, old man Mitchell, yell from the vicinity of his yard. It ruins the moment, just a bit, and you can’t help the laughter that bubbles up as Steve nearly drops the boombox on his feet in his rush to turn it off.

“Sorry!” Steve yells back, and you laugh louder. Steve laughs too, the sound floating up to your window, and you can’t help the smile on your face.

You wave your hand at Steve, gesturing for him to come inside, and even from your window you can see the way his entire face blossoms into a wide grin as he lowers the boombox and makes his way towards your front door.

Steve wants to be yours. And you want to be his. And when you unlock the front door and pull Steve in for a big kiss, you press play on the boombox so the two of you can dance to George Michael’s unbearably cheesy song in your living room while you tell each other how you feel.

[wannaeatramyeon]

Jake Kim x Reader: Betting on love

Big Deal's gambling arc 2.0 but make it fun

It was Jason that noticed the longing looks, Brad that cringed at Jake's increasingly corny lines, and Lineman that started the bets.

It was also Jerry who caught Lineman trying to solicit money from the other members of the crew.

"What's that?" Jerry looks down at Lineman, trying and failing to hide some paper behind his back.

"Morning Jerry! Weather's nice today, huh? May I say your bald head is looking gloriously shiny-"

Cobra-quick, Jerry swipes the sheets, eyes scanning over the page, one hand holding a flailing Lineman back.

Jerry furrows his brows at the list of dates, names and figures before him. Everyone is betting on when Y/N and Jake would get together?

He considers this.

"50,000 won. Put me down for 2 weeks time."

Listen, it didn't have to come to this. If you and Jake could stop pussyfooting around one another and make the whole of Big Deal feel less like a third wheel, that would have been preferable.

But you couldn't, and they might as well make a quick buck out of it.

Jake, shrewd and clever, would have usually noticed the escalating amount of shenanigans if he wasn't too busy following you around with heart eyes.

.

.

It begins with a book of pick-up lines left on Jake's desk.

(This reeks of Jason's handiwork, trying to work things to his advantage but thinking he could take the high road by being subtle.)

Jake's brows knit together as he flicks through the pages. Huh, some of this stuff is pretty good. A bit cliched but...

Like a puppy, Jake bounds over to you the next morning, greeting you with his usual cheesy grin. His arm comes round your shoulder, and you feel the heat of him like a brand.

You wonder if today is finally the day he asks you out. You're not dense, you know you're practically attached at the hip. Jake's flirting is obvious, your flirting is obvious. (The collective groan from Big Deal can be heard for miles.)

Instead,

"Hey Y/N! So God Dog, Hostel and Workers walk into a Big Deal bar-"

(The collective groan gets louder. Jason is the loudest.)

.

.

"Lovers' lunch offer?"

With pockets full of lint, you and Jake are never one to turn down a deal.

(Brad knows this too. Big Deal allowances are not generous. He has arranged this especially and feels like a goddamn mastermind.)

Lovers? Well it's certainly not an unwelcome thought. Jake sneaks a glance at you as you peer into the store window. He knows you like the back of his hand, he knows how well you would both fit. But the jump from friends to lovers seems gargantuan and completely terrifying.

"Come on!" You grip his wrist, dragging him in and breaking him out of his reverie.

Candles? Tablecloth? Friggin rose petals?

"They're really going all out here," Jake comments, smoothing down his shirt. It's just another place on Big Deal street, yet he feels oddly giddy. Fidgety. Like he wants to reach out and clasp your hand between his.

You raise your eyebrow in amusement at Jake's odd demeanour before examining the menu.

It's all prepackaged ramen.

Which, you guess is fine. If it's cheap.

...You gawk at the cost.

There is zero percent, absolutely no chance in hell, you are paying these prices. Did the owner think people were idiots? The markup is astronomical.

"This place sucks." you say, standing to leave.

"It does suck," Jake agrees and joining you, having seen the prices for himself.

Later that night:

"Brad, you idiot!"

"Fuck you Lua, you know I can't cook. You want me to serve them some burnt turd instead?"

"Then why the hell did you overcharge them so much?"

"You think candles and rose petals are FREE?"

.

.

"Who's been littering here?"

Jake frowns at the spread before him. Usually everyone knows to leave the street in a good condition, but sometimes stray teenagers still linger around and try to make the most of the pier and the ocean.

Lovers and troublemakers. Jerry does a good job of scaring them off.

It all looks a bit too organised to be litter. "I think they just left their stuff," you remark.

Crouching down and looking into the wicker basket, Jake sees everything still pristinely wrapped. It does look organised. Very fancy too. Some cheeses, unopened wine, a whole goddamn baguette. Whoever left this here must have gone in a hurry.

You squat down besides him, "Huh, all these things look untouched."

He recognises the look you give the food. He's seen you look at him like that sometimes too.

Either way, just because Jake is strapped for cash doesn't mean he doesn't have his dignity. He's not eating or letting you eat someone's trash that's been sitting out in the sun for god knows how long.

"Y/N," Jake pulls you away as you start to pout, "We're not eating that, that's pretty gross."

Upon seeing the Big Deal Leader bin all his precious food and ruin his meticulously set up picnic, Lineman cries on Lua's shoulder.

"That food was expensive as shit," he wails, "That's my whole week's allowance!"

.

.

You don't get to be Big Deal's No.2 without being able to pull a few strings.

It would send most people on a power trip, Jerry isn't most people. He's kind and patient and fair. So what he usually asks, he usually gets.

If he wants the Big Deal street to be empty and like a ghost town, it will be done.

You spot a tumbleweed, "Jake? Where's everyone?"

"Beats me."

Jake scrolls through his phone, just in case there was an event he's currently missing. Nope, nothing, nada.

"Y/N. I was thinking the other night... how would you rather die?" Listening round the corner, Jerry feels like he might die on the spot. With his limited experience, even he knows this topic is a romance killer, "I thought drowning might be peaceful but the water in my lungs..."

"Jumping to your death might be fun?" You tap your chin thoughtfully, "It needs to be super high up though-"

And if Jerry wants the Big Deal street to be crowded and absolutely rammed, then so be it.

"Is there a festival or something?" you ask.

Jake scrolls through his phone again, just in case there was a festival he's currently missing. Nope, nothing, nada.

Jerry watches from a nearby building, feeling like an all powerful puppetmaster.

Ok, so his initial idea of giving you two privacy was a bust. Now he has pivoted to forcing closeness.

You would get jostled about with lots of accidental touching, leaving both of you a blushing mess. Maybe someone would trip you up, and Jake would catch you in his arms. He would gaze down at you, the spark between you-

"EVERYONE!" Jake's voice drifts up to him, "I HAVE NO IDEA WHY IT'S SO BUSY. BUT IF YOU BUMP INTO Y/N AGAIN, I WILL KILL YOU. GOT IT?"

A chorus of "Yes, sir!"

Lua watches it all unfolding next to Jerry. "Cheer up Jerry. It was a pretty shitty plan, to be fair."

.

.

For the day Lua bet on, she was blessed with divine intervention.

The heavens parted and rain descended, catching you both stranded in the downpour. Doesn't every romance have a kiss in the rain?

You shiver in your t-shirt, arms hugging yourself. "Jake, take off your coat for us to use as an umbrella!"

With strength even Jake didn't know he possessed, he does not look at you. He cannot. The shower has started to soak through your top, making it almost transparent and baring your- Jake gulps.

He would be lying if he said he never imagined you and your body (almost every night, though that's completely besides the point). This though? This is indecent. Like he is taking advantage of the moment.

Jake starts to shrug off his own coat, deciding to let himself get soaked and to preserve your modesty until -

Look, Jake knows he has a great body. He keeps himself in excellent shape. Girls swoon over him, guys swoon over him, and don't think he didn't notice how your eyes rove over his chest and abs and tattoos. You thought you were being discreet? Discreet, his ass. And speaking of ass, he's seen you checking that out too.

But the thought of now revealing his body to you. Knowing that his shirt will be soaked through, and you will both be standing like you're topless. Not because he's been training, not because it's an unusually hot day, not because of some other shit.

This. This is unfairly intimate. Like it's the start of something. Something that leads to other things.

An extremely alien feeling of self-consciousness and demureness hits Jake. Is this what it feels like to be shy?

He want this. He would love this. Yet it feels like a first-time of sorts with you, and it really deserves more prestige than this situation allows.

Jake chooses to run off instead, taking his jacket with him.

"Come on Y/N! Let's just run home," he shouts back.

Hmph, you think, soaked to the bone and chasing after him. Chivalry is dead.

.

.

Big Deal is not without its problems.

And one of the big fucking huge problem is that everyone is a gangster, or at least a gangster in training.

Sugarcoat it all you want, sure there is passion involved and you're protecting the street. Typical dangers still lurk. It's a fact.

With trembling hands, you apply the bandage Jake around his chest. Round and round it goes, until the stitches and wound are completely hidden.

It's not the first time you've done this, and it won't be the last. You know what being in Big Deal means.

Nevertheless, it upsets you every time.

"Shh, Y/N. Don't be like that," Calloused fingers come up to wipe the tears from your cheeks. You didn't even realise you were crying.

"You should be so lucky," Jake's ever comforting smile comes into focus, "Getting your hands all over me."

Your laugh is wet, but you do laugh. Jake always makes you laugh.

And then you reach out, pressing your hand to his heart, feeling it thrum beneath your fingers, the thump-thump-thump calming your own nerves. Needing to feel Jake's own beat to ground you.

You're always the first port of call when Jake gets into trouble, somewhere along the way it just happened. And every time without fail,, your stomach drops and you feel sick as you sprint towards his side.

Jake places his hand over yours, "Thanks for always being there for me."

As you peer up at him from beneath your wet lashes, he thinks about what it means to regret something.

In his brief years of being alive, there are already many. But if he didn't do this, it might be the biggest regret of them all.

With his other hand, Jake tilts your face towards him. He doesn't notice the tear tracks on your cheeks, or the slight quiver of your lips.

All he can see is the love in your eyes, certain that it reflects his own.

Jake presses his lips to yours, and you can feel his smile.

.

.

" YEONHUI!" Sinu bursts in, almost knocking the door off its hinge in his excitement, "Jake and Y/N finally got together!"

"Huh?" Yeonhui tilts her head at this development, "I thought Jake was injured?"

"Whatever," Sinu flaps his hand in dismissal, "He's fine."

"So those brats made the jump huh? At least it didn't take them ten years."

"Yeonhui..." Sinu whines, curling himself round her back and smooching her cheek, "You still going on about that?"

"Hmph."

"At least we won the bet. I'll treat you out to dinner?"

"You better, we still have ten years of dinners to make up for!"

[birdycage]

Some fanarts for the amazing fic 'Of City Boys and Southerners' by @social-deception and Hammocker (on AO3). It's a really fantastic farm AU, both very cute and very sexy (and very 18+)

The first image (and the cropped one) is a mix of a cheesy romance novel cover and Leon's horse-riding dreams from a couple of early chapters, and the last image is based on a scene from chapter 7.

It's a really wonderful story with a bit of a romance novel vibe, but not too corny or cliche. It's a perfectly paced slow burn, all the characters are written beautifully, and the sex scenes are amazing. There's even a little bit of angst, but it fits right in with everything else. Everything about it just makes it an absolute 10/10 comfort fic!

I will probably get around to doing some more fanart for this fic next time I re-read it since there are a ton of really great scenes.

[haleigh-sloth]

i dont wanna bother you but youre like one of the only ppl that actually understand how bnha is supposed to be read imo. like i think for a lot of ppl it was their first manga or first battle shonen so they expected too much from it but bnha has never been anything "special" yknow? its more of the same and not even that good and full of cliches and thats not bad at all! there are many things abt it to still be enjoyed but ppl love to read it wrong for no reason. anyway thanks for your service 🙏

Oh lord 😭😭😭😭 you’re definitely not a bother (asks are welcome and appreciated in these trying times)

Lol I appreciate this. I know a few people who have a like mind as I do when it comes to this topic so….I know I’m not the only one lolol.

I’ll say that…nobody can tell you how to read stuff or interpret stuff. It’s fiction and it’s there for us to have fun with. “Correct” is a weird way to put it but it’s just more like, you gotta be cynical and realistic. It’s a boring way to be but, it is what it is. Well, really only if you’re analyzing and trying to decide what the author is trying to make you think. Like…there’s what you want for the story, and what the author wants for the story. And the author is telling you, in the text. That’s why analyzing is more cynical and less “fun” for some people (I love it). Because the answer you come to may not be the one you want when trying to decide what’s gonna happen in the story next (the Todofam plot is….the biggest example of this as I’ve seen with many peeps).

Because reality is reality. Canon is canon. And…I agree that this seems to be a lot of peoples’ first go round with shonen.

A cheesy, corny, cliche, absolutely run of the mill shonen.

BNHA is absolutely unique in many ways. The Todoroki plot line is unique. You don’t find those much in these types of mangas. Shigaraki himself is a unique character all on his own, but he’s been in the works and spun around in the author’s mind like a rotisserie chicken since 2007. He’s a work of art in his own, and you can tell the author has the most fun with him just by looking at his chapters and arc. So yeah lol.

But the issues brought up in BNHA aren’t new or unique. The tropes aren’t unique. The atrocious heterosexual romance that is basically guaranteed to be canon in the end isn’t unique or new and it’s not gonna be a “gotcha! You thought this guy and girl would end up together? Wrong! It’ll be these two guys!” *sigh* And it does seem like a lot of people are riding on Horikoshi breaking the chain of awful straight romance writing and making certain ships canon. And like placing their entire opinion and experience on that. And just, guys. Come on. The LOV are great villains but, they’re antagonists. They’re not gonna suddenly put the heroes in their place and the heroes are the “bad guys” in the end. Not happening. Wrong genre. Wrong manga.

Bnha has its strengths and there is a reason so many people follow it. But it’s also so popular because of those typical tropes that it’s following to a T. It’s a formula and it worked. It works on people who are looking for something different, works on people who just want repeats of Naruto over and over again. So here we are lol

[thenightling]

Hocus Pocus 30th anniversary

Thirty years ago today Hocus Pocus went into the cinema.

Admittedly, it's not exactly "high art." It's corny, it's low budget, it's full of cheese and editing mistakes. But we loved it.

It's about some kids who accidentally invoke The Sanderson Sisters, three evil witches who died in seventeenth century Salem. The three witches are gloriously incompetent and sort of work as a magical, evil, three stooges.

I saw Hocus Pocus on the big screen in August of 1993. I was eleven-years-old. I remember having the amusing thought (well, amusing to me anyway) that "This is set on Halloween night of this year. It hasn't happened yet. If this was real I could go to Salem and warn them. (I was into a lot of time travel scifi like Quantum Leap in those days).

I loved Hocus Pocus but my absolute favorite film of that year (and one of my favorite films of all time) was the stop motion animated musical, Tim Burton's The Nightmare before Christmas. I was obsessed with that movie and it's score by composer Danny Elfman. And like Hocus Pocus Disney didn't realize what a hit it was with young audiences until years later.

Hocus Pocus was technically a flop when it first came out but over time those of us that loved it as kids- and had bought it on VHS tape- grew up. And we started to watch it annually when it aired on The Family Channel (today known as Freeform). And Disney noticed. Disney noticed our nostalgic love for this campy film that they thought had been forgotten.

It became a deliciously cheesy time capsule of all the tropes and cliches of teen and family films of the early to mid-90s.

We turned our corny, childhood favorite into a Nostalgic cult classic. which now has loads of merchandise that didn't exist in the 90s, including dolls and action figures. A sequel was made and a planned third movie, as well as a Broadway musical are currently in development. And there is a Disney parks stage show.

My mother always used to watch Hocus Pocus with my brother and I and she was convinced that one day there would be a sequel and felt the three little girls who stole the Sanderson Sisters brooms was setting up for that sequel or foreshadowing it. She was kind of right as the sequel is about three teenaged good witches taking on The Sanderson Sisters. Much like the three-in-one of Neil Gaiman's The Sandman The Sanderson Sisters represent the classic witchy personas of Maiden, Mother, and Crone. Though not virginal, the child-like Sarah Sanderson is the Maiden, the doting mother-figure of the group is Mary, and the leader, is Winidfred Sanderson as the vindictive Crone. Though Disney would never admit it, it's very likely that their depiction of The Sanderson Sisters was inspired by the three Witches (the Hecate that would later appear in The Sandman) as they first appeared in DC's The Witching Hour Comics. Not just because of the Maiden, Mother, Crone motif but they even bear the same physical appearances. From the sexy blond Maiden, to the food-loving, black haired, Mother. The same hair and personality types.

[rewatchdoctorwho]

The Great Doctor Who (Re)Watch: 2005, Part One

Rose - It might be cheesy and the special effects might be a little clunky, but it's still really fun watching the Doctor get reintroduced. The End of the World - An emotional and resonant story that gives us our first really good look at the new Doctor's emotional hearts. The Unquiet Dead - The first (sort of) Christmas special of Doctor Who is a little corny with its Victorian cliches, but there just enough good moments to sustain interest. Aliens of London/World War Three - Despite the farting aliens and the cringy effects used to realize them, this is really where the Modern Series gets going, introducing elements and characters that would shape the show for years to come. Dalek - The genocidal garbage cans are rarely taken very seriously as a concept, and as this excellent story aptly represents, when they are, you see why their status as the show's greatest creations is so very warranted. The Long Game - Decent little romp, with an underlying message that's relevent if a little ham-fisted in its delivery. Father's Day - This story is designed to illustrate the dangers of tampering with time and it's a little cringy, but its heart is in the right place. The Empty Child/The Doctor Dances - Absolutely awesome--scary, funny, suspenseful, and introduces Captain Jack. Favorite of the Modern Series so far. Boom Town - It occasionally gets tripped up by some dodgy show-spanning mythology but this is still a very fun and very poignant story. Bad Wolf/The Parting of the Ways - The first part, with the early-2000s game show parodies, is pretty dated and cringy, but the magnificent second part makes up for it by sending the Ninth Doctor out in fine fashion.

[junkrathell]

I think at some point, inevitably, Junkrat is going to say—or do—something that makes Mei laugh. Genuinely laugh. And when he does, it's going to make him so happy, his face is going to light up. And he's going to remember the sound of it forever. And he'll keep himself up and night thinking about the first time she smiled at him.

[valentine-writes]

Could it be possible to get some romantic Monty please? 🥺

monty x reader assorted hcs !

↳ ft. montgomery gator

「 gn! reader, romantic relationship <3 」

author's note: ( つ᷄.̯σ̣̥᷅ ) <3 o i luv monty sm of course anon!!!! im super excited 2 write these up 4 u- gramatical errors and spelling mistakes might b here tho, apologies in advance ! :(

▸ he's definitely not shy about liking you and he makes that very clear. well, he definitely tries to- he really wants to play it cool around you

▸ on the days where you're at the pizzaplex and it's near closing time, he'd find you just to chat you up

▸ one time he tried to use a pick up line on you. the delivery was so confident, as if he imagined you swooning into his arms after you heard it- but it was so cheesy and cliche that instead of having a reaction he was hoping for, you paused, blinked several times-

▸ ...and then burst out into a fit of giggles. he was a little frustrated at first that it didn't work and thought you weren't just taking him seriously- but the way you were laughing was so innocent and sweet that he realized you weren't laughing at him. you just thought that he was joking around

▸ now he drops pick up lines 24/7 that are just as corny as the first one. swooning or laughing are both acceptable reactions he'll take from you- he just wants to let you know he likes you without having to let down his whole tough guy act

▸ he's taken off or lowered his sunglasses just to wink at you. monty pulls this trick multiple times, and no matter if it gets old to you or not, he thinks it works absolutely great

▸ sometimes, he'll bring you into his green room to let you listen to him play his bass, hoping to impress you.

▸ very, VERY secretly, monty is incredibly soft for you. after talking to you or seeing you, he'll return to his green room and try not to short circuit himself over the pounding of his (non literal) heart.

▸ if you gave him a compliment, no matter how little or brief- he would NEVER stop thinking about it. say his sunglasses look cool? he won't leave anywhere without them. you mentioned his bass skills are really nice? he's practicing even more than usual (despite the fact he is programmed to already know how to play it). you like his voice? he'll give you every opportunity to hear it

▸ monty isn't mean mean but he's definitely not beyond teasing you. it's all playful, but it's pretty frequent. a lot of holding things above your head, which he'll do mainly to get your attention.

▸ he won't let anyone actually be mean to you though. no way. if someone ever made fun of you or treated you badly, you'd physically have to drag him away from the person so he doesn't rip them apart. no one's gonna hurt you and get away with it on his watch.

▸ if his teasing ever makes you upset or goes too far though, he'll literally feel terrible about it and immediately try to apologize after realizing. it's awkward and kind of painful to hear how stiff and unnatural his apology sounds- but it's way too sincere to be something he's just saying so you won't be sad anymore. he really doesn't want to hurt you or scare you off.

▸ your name could legally be "shortstack" by the amount of times he's called you that. you don't even have to be short by human standards, you're shorter than him and that's all that matters

▸ speaking of nicknames- you've got a bunch from him. literally inescapable. but that makes him using your real name all the more personal. the way he says it sounds so caring, like he's trying to show how much he loves you just by saying it

▸ loves when you cling to his arm. he prefers it over hand holding and thinks its the most endearing thing in the world. having you so close to him makes him feel so, so incredibly happy

▸ when you two are closer to each other, and there's a comfortable silence between you two- he'll wrap his arms around you from behind and rest his head on your shoulder sometimes. after a few seconds of being completely stiff- he squeezes you a little tighter and pulls you in a little closer.

▸ though he puts up a tough front most of the time, it goes down when you impress him. it could be anything- having a hobby, being skilled at something, handling spicy food, not being scared of horror movies- if he deems it impressive, he'll boast about it endlessly. it's his way of noticing the little things that make you, you. and he adores you :]

▸ you tried on his sunglasses one time, wondering what it would look like on you. you thought he'd get mad- nope. he nearly melted on the spot. he won't say it, but he was absolutely flustered with how cute they were on you.

[izukult]

“hey this song reminds me of you…” MHA BOYS

songs they canonically would send you if they were interested (horikoshi approved)

izuku midoriya— be your man; H 3 F

he’s such a cutie, such a sweetheart. he says it reminds him of you, and then proceeds to send about fifty texts following before you can even respond (“i mean not romantic!! as friends!!” “unless you’d mean romantic” “but i’m not saying that!” “blech icky” “NOT SAYING YOUR EHICKY” “NO” “OKAY SORRY JUST IGNORE THIS HAHA(´⊙ω⊙`)”). he absolutely clearly means it in a romantic way, for someone who’s keeping the secret of the number one hero he is a bad mf liar.

runner up: japanese denim. he likes love songs, he thinks they’re kind and anything he hears that’s the slightest bit about love he’s gonna associate w you

katsuki bakugo— bitches; mindless self indulgence

he wants you to be bitches? he wants u to love him cos u know that he can rock?!!!!?!!!?!?! that he can rhyme?! that he can fuck?!!!! THAT HES ON TIME?! plain and simple. he does not say this reminds you of him, he does not link it with you in any way. he just randomly sends it (if even).

if you were really lucky he’d send you love me dead by ludo.

denki kaminari— natalie; HUNNY

he tells you to ignore the name, of course, (unless your name is natalie lol) but the whole rest of it is absolutely applicable. he’s very upfront about it. is acting a lot more reassured than he is but he’s literally about to shit himself he wants you so bad bro. he practiced ways to tell you it wasn’t for you / “he didn’t mean it like that, man” before he sent it to you just incase you rejected him lol.

right after you two confess he sends you teenage dirtbag by wheatus and says “fr felt it when they said whatever it was they said, anyway u free tmrw?!”

eijiro kirishima— someone to you; banners

ew this is so cliche. this man would be so cheesy, especially in the preemptive stages of a relationship. if he wants you, you know (i mean maybe not, he’s nice to a lot of people, but he clearly cares about you). he’s on brand fr, but he really, genuinely blares this shit at full volume in his earbuds and headbangs. this is fr how he feels…. he probably wouldn’t panic sending it, he doesn’t think it’s a big confession, he just thinks about you when he hears it so he wants to share.

a kiss; THE DRIVER ERA. his main reason for this one is “just the vibes man!!” he selectively pays attention to lyrics

hanta sero— love is only a feeling; joey bada$$

he’s corny and very transparent about it. he sends it to you like three days before he asks you out. he’s pretty confident, but he types and deletes ‘i’ve got a song that makes me think of you’ about five times before he sends it. i think he listens to a lot of music, but rnb and rnb rap are probably his romantic go to’s in my mind.

alternatively: me and your mama; childish gambino

shoto todoroki— on an evening in roma (sott’er celo de roma)- remastered; dean martin

idk i feel like he listens to a lot of really old pretentious shit. he likes the music, it helps him stay calm, it makes him feel warm. he thinks the instruments are nice when they swell just right, and he wants to share that with you. he has also definitely offered to take you on a trip w his dads money (i hate fanon characters but i absolutely thrive off the idea that shoto buys his s/o shit w his dads money)

also a high chance hed send scene one— james dean & audrey hepburn; sleeping with sirens and that makes me sick to my stomach it’s so cheesy. he’s not like a coward and once he figured out he had feelings for you, he’d be pretty blunt about it.

neito monoma— star killer; bear ghost

if you ask why it makes him think about you he’s gonna say some arrogant shit about how you want him. but actually this is a really good song and he for sure sings it in his bathroom mirror and checks himself out. how humiliating. idk what to say other than listen to it

alternatively: the ballad of big poppa and diamond girl; cobra starship. this song screams neito to me, if i could dance w him to this song life would actually be okay? the only reason i didn’t put it as the main is because i didn’t know if it was projecting, anyway THIS.

hitoshi shinsou— k; cigarettes after sex

this would lowkey be embarrassing for him tbh. this song feels so personal and intimate, if someone you weren’t dating said this reminded you of them, youd have to be really into them for it to not weird you out. however luckily you are really into him. he knows his point is gonna come across, and he’s confident behind it. he sent it as a way to say hey mf im into you, i know you’re into me

compass; the neighbourhood. he kinda listens to teenage girl music, he’s going through that phase. this song is so cute tho!! he’s kinda doting in a weird way, it’s sweet.

[soupbabe]

Hello! Not sure how free (?) you are to write a request, but when you have time, could you write Stardust Crusaders with an s/o that is an absolute romantic? Like they love dancing in the rain with them, drawing art of them, telling them corny but very sweet compliments, etc ? That cliche stuff (*^w^*) 💕 preferably female reader, but gender neutral is just fine!!

SDC w a Hopeless Romantic! S/O

Aaaa this sounds so cute!! Also, this will be a gender neutral reader since I don't write fem readers! :)

Jotaro Kujo

Kind of (very) thankful that you can lead him through this relationship

Even if it's the cliche stuff you see in movies, he appreciates that at least one person is better at the whole relationship thing

I think he's grown to love all the corny pickup lines and the sweet compliments

Got him pulling his hat down to cover the light blush on his cheeks smh

Sometimes he shoots back with an equally as cheesy (but sweet) compliment that leaves you thinking about it for the rest of the day

Noriaki Kakyoin

He would start off a tad bit critical when it comes to your cliche ideas, "it's real life, not a movie" kind of thing

He would probably brush some ideas of yours off, but would warm up to it as your relationship progresses

He collects all the drawings that you drew him, constantly praising you for your attention to detail

He enjoys drawing you too, sometimes asking you to pose for him

He will indulge in some of your dramatic date ideas, sometimes it's just hard to say no to you

Jean-Pierre Polnareff

Oh Polnareff is so excited that he has someone who could finally understand him!

His favorite thing to do is come up with lists of cute nicknames for you, but his go tos are the very basic Mon cheri/Ma Cherie and Handsome/Beautiful

Although he'll surprise you with the especially cheesy (and sometimes cringey) ones: Cutie pie, honey bun, and hot stuff are some you may endure

You two love having picnics together, cuddling up together while you both talk about your day

He'd be the one to draw you two together a lot. He isn't the most artistically skilled, but the two doodles of you two being lovey dovey never fails to make you the tiniest bit flustered

Muhammad Avdol

He thinks that you being a hopeless romantic is one of the things he likes about you

He sees himself as more of a realist, so having you around to encourage him to recreate scenes from your favorite romance media is very charming to him

Also he enjoys how you could make something like a dinner and conversation between you two more intimate and special for the both of you

He appreciates your compliments greatly, always thanking you and giving you one back

Sometimes you purposely make your one liners bad so you'll get a light laugh from Muhammad

[mmkin]

So recently my SO introduced me to Batman the Brave and the Bold, and we marathoned all 3 seasons of it. I’ve enjoyed many DC cartoon series, going all the way back to the Batman animated series from the early 90′s, although not neccessarily at the times they aired, particularly for late 00/10′s shows (Young Justice...I marathoned that earlier this winter and OMG I can’t wait for the new season!) I’ve also been enjoying the live-action DC shows... Supergirl, Green Arrow, Legends of Tomorrow, etc... thank goodness for Netflix! Anyway, it’s been a real blast with BtBatB. I enjoyed the artwork, and the often corny/cheesy writing, and many of the character designs and storylines. But damn, Music Meister... he’s really stuck in my head now. I absolutely love his appearance/character design, right down to the gap in his teeth. I really would love to see him again in a future series, animated or not - but this time, I’d like him to look the way he did in the cartoon! (Nothing personal against the Darren Criss appearahce/version in Supergirl but I wanted my gap-toothed ginger hunk!) One thing I did NOT like was the thing with Black Canary. Not bashing MM/BC shippers here, mind you, I just really hate the cliche ‘if I can’t have her, I’ll kill her’ schtick they used for his episode. Not only that but he fucking tried to kill her TWICE. Jesus tap-dancing Christ. I mean yeah, it’s not like this was portrayed as a good or healthy thing to do but it’s still so damn cliche. I also didn’t like how he fell for her just because she could sing. It’s another cliche I see all too often in comics/cartoons. Just because someone shares a passion or hobby with you doesn’t mean they’re ‘the one’ for you. It’d be cool if Music Meister fell for a deaf/hard of hearing woman... he couldn’t hypnotize her with his singing, so any feelings on her part would be genuine. And it’d be interesting to see MM have to do/think in a way that did NOT include his music, because it’s healthy to disengage from your passion/hobby every now and then and makes you less one-dimensional as a character. Anyway, I’ve rambled on long enough about my thoughts about MM... so I’m sharing some lovely fanart of MM I’ve found across the web. (to be clear, I do not claim credit for any of these and am just posting them for enjoyment of fellow MM fans!)

[summonerscenarios]

The Oni characters reacting to MC putting the moves on them and telling them "Yunno you're the ONI one for me baby!" Keep being awesome Juno!

AASDFGHJKKJH Anon this is singlehandedly the best pickup line I have ever heard and this was just too good to pass up. Tho i did struggle actually finding out which characters were oni and which ones weren’t lmao

----

Takemaru

When you try to flirt with Takemaru he often thinks that you’re just trying to tease him - more than once you’ve slid in a flirtatious comment into the conversation just to watch him get flustered and warn you to not be so brazen teasing your elders like that. That does little to stop you, however, so once you thought up this absolutely perfect line you knew just who you were going to use it on. Takemaru has no clue what you’ve got planned when you sidle up beside him, conversing like nothing’s wrong until you find a moment in the conversation that’s just right to slip in your flirty comment.

Takemaru turns his head to stare at you as soon as the words leave your mouth. He’s so floored by your words that he reacts without thinking. He bursts into laughter, bringing a hand up to his face and shaking his head; he’s laughing so hard that he’s leaning over the table he was working at, gripping the edge with his free hand to keep himself upright. His laughter is contagious, and you’re giggling too, playfully whining that ‘come on, it wasn’t that bad!’. When he’s calmed down enough to get a word in he waves a hand in your direction, commenting that he just can’t take you seriously after you just said that, and you’re so amused by the situation that you can’t even be mad that the flirty comment fell flat on its face. Or so you assume, as once he’s fully recovered, Tak brings a hand to ruffle your hair, saying that even if it was cheesy it definitely hit it’s mark - just next time maybe go with something a bit more serious.

Oniwaka

Honestly, using this line on Oniwaka is a double whammy - not only is it a prime flirty remark, but it’s also a cute play on his name. So when you first come up with it, it’s too good of an opportunity to pass up on and not use it on him; the only questions were when, and where you were gonna try it out. It doesn’t take much to find him, especially because you see him so often, and you spot him with his back turned to you, focusing on something else. Seeing this as a prime opportunity you run up to him, using the momentum to slide across the floor the rest of the way and slam into the wall right next to him (granted your hands hurt like hell afterwards but it was worth it). Oniwaka jolts, snapping his head to face you and seems to relax once he realizes that it’s you; seeing him relax you decide now’s a good of a time as any to try out your newest flirting tactic. 

Oniwaka blanks once the words leave your mouth, once it clicks that you’ve just flirted with him you finally get a proper answer. He groans making a halfhearted comment about that line being such a cliche, but even you can see that his cheeks are turning a dusty pink color the longer that you grin at him, shuffling closer as you attempt to get him to admit that it was a good one. 

Suzuka

Flirting with Suzuka and not being threatened or scared off immediately in some way is a small miracle in itself. Unless you mean it you better not try and play any flirting games with her because she will shut that shit down fast; with that being said, however, you’re a notable exception, as most of your flirtatious encounters end in either a deep sigh or her snapping some kind of retort back at you. You don’t push your luck though, and save it for when you’re seriously putting on the moves on her. When you suddenly slide into the guild one day, yelling her name loud enough to turn a couple of heads she whips around to face you, watching in confusion as you steady yourself, take a deep breath and declare "Yunno you're the ONI one for me, baby!", in front of the entire room. The expression on her face is priceless - dumbfounded, then realization as her face blossoms a deep shade of red all the way down to her neck - but then she looks furious, and you’re suddenly realizing that maybe you should have done this in private.

What breaks the standstill is when you wink at her for good measure, then proceed to book it for your life right back out of the room, and all hell breaks loose. The next second she’s taking off after you, more embarrassed about you yelling your declaration out in public than she is about the corny line, and you can hear her shouting for you to stop running. She just wants to talk. If you’d stopped, you’d find that she wasn’t actually gonna kill you - granted you’d get lectured within an inch of your life - but for a girl known for her temper and fiery spirit, in that moment you’re 100% convinced that she’s going to give your torso some new holes if she catches you.

Toji

Toji attempts to remain stone faced when presented with your flirting. He can feel something’s up when, while spending time with you in your dorm room, you shuffle across the bed towards him, only pausing once you’re right at his side, laying stomach down on your bed with your chin propped up by your fists as you grin up at him. He stares at you from the corner of his eye for a moment, but he knows that you’re waiting for him to cave and speak first. Toji eventually looks away from his textbook and down at you, one eyebrow raised as he asks you what’s got you looking so smug now. With that as your cue you wave nonchalantly and tell him that you were just thinking, not going any further until he plays along and asks what you’re thinking about. It takes little more than that for you to tell him. “Oh, it’s just, y’know you're the oni one for me baby~!”

What follows next is Toji making a choked sound in response, then suddenly there’s a pillow sailing in your direction which has you dropping face down on the bed to narrowly avoid. You jolt back up with a ‘Hey! I thought that was a good one!’ He shoots back asking if you’re serious - did you really just say that?! With no hesitation whatsoever?! His reactions never fail to get a laugh out of you, and you’re biting back a smile as you try to coax him to admit that c’mon, it was pretty good - he closes his eyes, brows furrowed, before he releases a deep breath and, somewhat reluctantly, admits that it was certainly one of your more creative comments. He regrets it almost immediately when you shuffle right back over to his side, telling him that if he thought that was good, just wait till he hears the others you’ve thought up! You’ve got a whole bunch you’ve been just dying to tell him. Needless to say that textbook he’s reading is put on the backburner after that point.

Shuten

Getting a moment alone with Shuten is an occurrence that’s few and far between - a lot of his time is spent with his club members (namely Ibaraki) . Unless you ask him outright to have a moment alone. So it’s by a stroke of chance that right after club activities the two of you are the only ones in the changing rooms, already finished getting changed back into your uniforms and taking a moment to idle in the room before heading out and going your separate ways. You’d been mulling the line over in your head for a while, looking between your hands and Shuten and rolling the idea of saying it out loud in your head. There’s a pause for a second, then two, the three - then you just let it slip out, riding the rush of outwardly flirting with the baseball captain to get the words out there. It doesn’t get the reaction that you expect.

Shuten gives you a surprised look, head tilting slightly to the side and asking you to repeat what you just said. It’s a little bit embarrassing saying it the second time, the rush from blurting it out the first time wearing off a little now that you’re consciously aware that he’s paying attention to what you’re saying. When you say it this time he actually chuckles, saying “you know, that was pretty good” and immediately washing any nervousness you have right off of your shoulders. Emboldened, you shuffle across the bench to get closer, joking about how you’ve got a couple more up your sleeves that you’re sure he’s gonna like. In response, Shuten turns his attention to you fully and gives you an indication that he’ll listen to you - you’re pretty sure that he hasn’t clocked on to the fact that those flirting attempts are aimed directly at him, but it’s honestly a better reaction than what you’d initially expected.

Ibaraki

You often go to visit Ibaraki once the after school events have finished, since it’s the best chance of running into him if you’re not willing to go barreling into Kabukicho all the time just to see him. Since the game’s only just started wrapping up when you arrive, you spend a little while watching the team as they practice and go through some basic sports exercises before finally calling it a day. You catch Ibaraki as he jogs over to his gear, fishing around for something before pulling out something to drink to wash off the after training fatigue. He notices you and offers you a chill greeting, shrugging off his jacket and bringing his drink up to his lips to chug down at least half of the bottle - there’s a few seconds where you pause, but you’ve been thinking about this line all day that waiting is nearly impossible. So you blurt it out right away.

Waiting for him to finish his drink probably would have been a smarter idea, because as soon as Ibaraki hears what you just said to him he does a spit take and proceeds to choke on his drink so badly that you end up spending the next few minutes awkwardly patting his back while he coughs and sputters. By the time that he’s able to breathe normally again he looks up at you and rasps out a ‘What?! Did’ja not wanna wait till I was finished to spring that one me?!’ while wiping away the leftover drops of drink from his chin with the back of his hand. You feel kind of bad for making him choke, but the reaction was oh so worth it - you didn’t actually expect that kind of response out of him, and apparently neither did he as he tries to play it off, asking you how long it took you to think that one up this time while trying insistently to change the subject away from his reaction. Whether you actually let it slide or not is up to how hotheaded you want him to get.

[thegaytwentysomething]

Smile - Katy Perry: Full Album Review

Track by Track:

1. Never Really Over - 9.5/10

2. Cry About It Later - 9/10

3. Teary Eyes - 9.5/10

4. Daisies - 8/10

5. Resilient - 7.5/10

6. Not the End of the World - 8.5/10

7. Smile - 6.5/10

8. Champagne Problems - 9/10

9. Tucked - 9.5/10

10. Harleys in Hawaii - 10/10

11. Only Love - 7/10

12. What Makes A Woman - 7/10

Katy Perry, the quintessential pop star of the 2010s, is no longer #1. After a disastrous Witness era marred by weak singles, poor promotion, and a lack of good PR, Katy’s gold star was left less shiny, very well-dented, and collecting some dust. The chapter of Katy’s career as the number one pop star in the world has closed. This is the scene for Smile: what to do once you’ve closed a chapter in your life. In a sonically mixed 12 tracks, Katy explores this topic head on, and though very much imperfect, she succeeds in embracing her flaws and creates a template for her years to come.

On the triumphant opening track “Never Really Over”, Katy starts a breathy vocal just a second after the initial synth note - a quick rebound from the past few years. Throughout the song, she bounces between airy syncopation, belted choruses, and rapid staccato over a glittery beat. Though not a career-defining track, the song never tries to be. Instead, Katy sounds beautifully vulnerable, carefree, and self-assured. We’re off to a good start.

After, Katy sinks into a cool, modern sound with “Cry About It Later”. This track is perhaps her most radio-ready in years, embracing the darker minimalist EDM of Ariana Grande and The Weeknd. With that said, it doesn’t sound like Katy is clawing for a hit. A guitar solo after the bridge breaks up an otherwise completely tailored-for-radio instrumental. Katy’s lyrical voice is clear with vivid idiosyncrasies about champagne, tattoos, devils, and angels. A team of songwriters hired to ensure a hit would have sanded off all of the character of the track. Luckily, Katy keeps her voice even under lots of filters on this radio-ready track with an ear worm chorus.

Katy then does a 180 back to 2012 with “Teary Eyes”, a gay club-ready EDM house banger. The trope of dancing through adversity and heartbreak is a gay tale as old as Judy Garland’s ruby reds, and Katy gives us the goods on this campy, melodramatic, and infectious gem. The chanting choir mimicking the chorus’s melody in a grooving “oh oh oh” is the cherry on top of a saccharine, yet satisfying tune. The song takes the infectiousness of Britney Spears’s “Till the World Ends” and euphoria of Kylie Minogue’s “Get Outta My Way” and fuses it with the anthemic drama of Perry’s “Rise”. Will it succeed on 2020 radio? Absolutely not. Is it a worthy addition to her discography? Absolutely.

The album shifts gears into adult contemporary with the slightly banal “Daisies”, which marches confidently towards mom pop empowerment in the spirit of Kelly Clarkson’s “Stronger” and Pink’s “Try”. Slightly more acoustic than your typical Democratic National Convention styled anthem, “Daises” comes from a place of earnestness. While it fails as a serious smash comeback single or a real classic like “Roar”, the track does just fine on the album, and doesn’t seem to be trying to prove anything in particular. Like the comfy Volvo station wagon in which this song may be played on adult contemporary radio, the song lacks sex appeal, but gets the job done.

“Daisies” almost perfectly segues into “Resilient” which sounds exactly as you’d expect. Safe, expected, and trite. On the plus side, the song does showcase some nice belts and is reminiscent of Katy’s very early pre One of the Boys lyricism. In an album context, the song succeeds quietly in letting Katheryn Hudson just be herself without pretense. There is a charm in the simplicity, and for that I won’t write the song off completely.

In a fairly jarring transition, Katy goes back to the trap-lite sound of “Dark Horse” with the over-baked “Not the End of the World”. This song isn’t bad, and in many respects, it is actually a banger. However, between the oddly-placed “Na Na Hey Hey Kiss Him Goodbye” sample and an aggressive use of auto tune, the song never seems to neatly achieve the impact for which it aims. Perhaps it is because the instrumental lacks the punch of “Dark Horse”, or perhaps it is because the triumphant theme is slightly discordant with a darker trap-pop sound, but the song never seems to really land quite as strongly as intended. It lacks focus. With that said, Katy’s Kim Petras-esque sing-talk verses are sung with a real swagger she so often lacks, and the song is anything but a bore. This track is certain to be polarizing, and on some level I applaud its chaotic approach.

After dancing through adversity and halfway creating a sense of empowerment through the first half of the album, Katy finally reclaims her “Smile” in the titular track. I recently heard the instrumental of this funk-lite track playing in the background of a Target advertisement, and frankly that is about all you need to know about the song. While I’m thrilled Katy has found joy, I’m less thrilled to hear corny lyrics like “I got a smile like Lionel Richie” on the title track of an otherwise good album. Katy truly doesn’t seem like she gives a fuck what I think on this track though, and for that I have to give some praise. It is nice when an artist isn’t seeking the public’s approval, and sometimes embracing joy can be cheesy. Maybe on a level, I want what she’s having.

The album starts anew in the second half with the very Harry Styles sounding track “Champagne Problems”. Like “Legendary Lovers” and “Roulette” before it, this song is sure to be an instant fan favorite. Every second is sonically interesting, mature, and satisfying. Like a crisp glass of bubbly, Katy seems mature, yet flirty and fun. I’m here for it. It’s great to be at a point where all you have is champagne problems, and this song sells that idea effectively. While not her best song, it is a good song, which is sometimes all you need need. Cheers!

If “Champagne Problems” was for those who love PRISM, then “Tucked” is for those who love Teenage Dream. From the strumming pop guitar to the big singalong chorus, “Tucked” leans into Katy’s strengths and embraces flirty fun in a way that she’s been trying to run away from for years. In the scope of the album and her career, the song is a blast from the past. It is a simpler Katy, and one which many have claimed to miss. At the same time, the return to form isn’t a desperate attempt at a hit. Simple pop songs like “Birthday” and “Last Friday Night” don’t make chart toppers in 2020. In that sense, this song is actually a bold choice, and a very confident one. To me, it says “I can still do that Teenage Dream stuff you always want me to do”, and it embraces it fully as one aspect of Katy Perry. Your past is still part of you, and you can go back to fun even when you’ve grown - and this song proves that. I quite love this little pop banger, and the album is much better for it.

I’ve written much in the past about my eternal love for Katy’s best song since “Dark Horse”, but let it just be said that I adore “Harleys in Hawaii”. Every second of this song is engaging, sexy, and sonically fabulous. For those who love the unique vocal and lyrical stylings of Katy Perry, this is a real treat. For those who don’t, this is probably just another so-so song. If you know what you’re listening for though, wow, what a track. It takes you to a fantasy, and immerses you in island vibes. This gem earned its place on this track list no matter what anyone says, and Katy knows it.

Then comes “Only Love” which drags on with trite, yet cute melodies and lyrics. For those who like the back half of PRISM, this song may really resonate, but for those of us who like a more sultry Perry, this track is a chore to listen to.

Closing the album is the personal “What Makes A Woman”. While not even Perry’s best album closer, the song is a cute cut, and may have done best replacing “Smile” in the middle of the album as an acoustic break between two pop halves.

All in all, this album does a good job of getting rid of the bitter taste of Witness and showcasing a broad spectrum of Katy’s distinctive artistic identity. Is it perfect? Absolutely not. Is it worthwhile? Absolutely. That seems to be the message here, both through the lyrics and through the meta messaging of the album’s direction in the context of Katy’s career. Cliche but true: you don’t have a thing to prove to anyone - just be you. Similarly, nobody can ever take away the gold star Katy earned during the first half of the 2010s. Her legacy is secure, the tragedies are behind her, and now she (and we) can enjoy the joy of the full spectrum of life without judgement or fear of failure.

Overall Grade: B+

[nijiirorhyme]

NaruMitsu/WrightWorth Fic: Lights, Camera, Action!

Fandom: Ace Attorney

Ship: Mitsurugi Reiji | Miles Edgeworth/Naruhodou Ryuuichi | Phoenix Wright

Warnings: None

Tags:Alternate Universe - Actors, Other Additional Tags to be Added, More characters to be added

Description: Rookie actor Phoenix Wright can not believe his luck as he scores his first major acting role in one of the most anticipated movies of the year. But, what was better than starring in one of the most anticipated films of the year? Starring in one of the most anticipated films of this year with famous actor Miles Edgeworth.

A Wrightworth acting au where two dorks (eventually) fall in love!  

Chapter 1/?

Alternatively, it can be read here!

Text underneath cut!

Act 1 Scene 1

 October 5th, 11:00pm

 Phoenix’s Apartment

Phoenix COULD NOT believe his luck. It was as if lady luck herself were watching over him specifically, feeling so sorry for him that she had to throw him a bone. He could not thank her enough. It seemed as if his life were doing a complete turnabout. Up until now and ever since he had graduated from some third rate university’s performing arts program, he never had the pleasure of striking a role anywhere near being a part of the main cast, but this, this was different. Sure, he had made small cameos as extras in movies, but none of those were enough to give him the boost he needed to put his name on the map. This was the real deal. He would have lines to say, scenes to act, parts where he’d be the one in the limelight. He was just offered the biggest acting gig in his entire life.

‘Lady luck, I know I asked you for help last night,’ he thought to himself, ‘but you didn’t have to go this far for me!’

But, what was better than starring in one of the most anticipated films of the year? Starring in one of the most anticipated films of this year with someone who was currently the world's most famous actor. Miles Edgeworth, a man who the world knew nothing about personally, but that his acting was absolutely phenomenal. Everyone— even their mothers and grandmothers— knew of him, but, it wasn’t until Pearls dragged the man to see one of her cheesy, sappy romance movies starring the mysterious man himself that he finally saw what justified the hype around him.

Romance movies weren’t really Phoenix’s thing as he tended to sleep through most of them. What he could recall of the movie, however, was that the plot was pretty standard; the main female protagonist living her life in poverty while her male counterpart was born into a wealthy family. After the two miraculously begin to date, the couple struggles to find acceptance from the man’s family as they already had a fiance picked out for him. This was all quite cliche in Phoenix’s book, but there was one scene in particular that stuck out to him.

Failing to gain acceptance from the man’s family, the man and the woman impulsively run away together during an explosive argument that erupted between the four. Well, more-so drove away, but that was besides the point. The rain pelted down upon their car as they drove down the winding road as fast as they could, but that had been the man’s fatal mistake. As they came upon their final turn, the man lost control of the steering wheel and the speed they had garnered caused the car to topple over several times before it finally came to a stop. Somehow (though Phoenix thought this defied all odds), the man was fortunate enough to only receive injury to his right arm and was able to wiggle himself free from the car, however, his girlfriend was more than misfortunate. The adrenaline pumped through his blood as he ignored his arm’s cry in pain as he tried to wretch her free from the car. His hands were covered in her blood as he laid her on his lap, knowing the inevitable that she would succumb to her injuries before they were even able to call for help.

His eyes looked into hers, a mix of pain and regret swirling around in his dark orbs. He drove too fast, he should have taken his time, he was about to lose the love of his life— Her voice was enough to snap him out of his thoughts, the booming sound of the thunder almost deafening. She gave him her final words, and just like that, the final bit of life evident in her eyes finally fades and her body goes limp in his arms. The man looked up to the overclouded sky, the rain beating upon his face as he gave  the heavens one last dramatic scream of her name before the movie faded away into a pitch black.

Throughout the entire scene, all Phoenix could do was stare at the big screen. There was something mesmerizing about the way Miles Edgeworth acted. He analyzed the actor’s every move, even the subtle ones that would be invisible to those who didn’t graduate from a third-rate performance arts program, yet contributed an overarching mood to the entire scene. The way his face contorted and twisted and scrunched up in pain as he was filled with regret from his actions, the way his eyes looked into hers in desperation that this was all just a dream— that he wasn’t just about to lose the one he fought so hard alongside, it left a heavy feeling in Phoenix’s chest that almost burst forth from it in the form of tears. Miles Edgeworth brought life to a character from a movie genre Phoenix hated, and not only made him sympathize with the corny character, but almost made him tear up, which to this day he still could not believe.

Phoenix was never a fan of romance movies, especially the ones that Pearls picked out (though he never voiced his complaints aloud) because he thought he could feel his teeth rotting away in his mouth from the sheer sappiness and disgusting sweetness of them, but this one was the only one he approved of.

… Even though it was at the expense of his own friend’s enjoyment.

Phoenix sighed at the memory of what happened afterwards. Pearl was the type of hardcore romance fan who only gravitated towards romance movies where the couple lived happily ever after at the end. Why she chose this movie was beyond Phoenix. Perhaps she glossed over the summary of the story after selectively reading the part where the female protagonist goes from “rags-to-riches” and thought it was something along the lines of Cinderella, completely missing the “this tragic story of her attempt to go from rags-to-riches”... or something. She was so depressed that even Phoenix offering to watch her favourite lovey-dovey romance movie for the gazillionth time wouldn’t cheer her up.

From that point on, Miles Edgeworth swept up the nation’s awards that year for his acting in that movie, including the “Best Male Lead Actor of the Year” award at the Movie of Movies Grand Prix— and to Phoenix, rightfully so. The man’s performance was amazing, yet he couldn’t help wanting to pick a bone with the panel of judges who thought that it deserved “Best Movie of the Year”. He totally thought that the Steel Samurai movie deserved to win (not like he had a bias or anything because his friend Austin Powers starred in it); just because one actor’s acting was remarkable, did not mean that the rest of the movie lived up to such a word.

This was the man that Phoenix had the pleasure of working with and although a part of him was excited, an immense sense of pressure ruined it. Miles Edgeworth was a man who had years of experience under his belt in comparison to himself. That fact in itself was enough to make the butterflies in his stomach awake from their slumber; he hadn’t felt this nervous in ages.

Phoenix glanced at the thick booklet of papers in his hand titled "No Time for Turnabouts: Script”, its thick blocky text staring back at him. With an unsteady sigh, he flipped it open to the first page. If Phoenix wanted to impress Miles Edgeworth at tomorrow’s pre-production meeting, there was only one thing he could do. If he couldn’t rely on his acting skills to impress him, the least he could do was come prepared to what he was about to walk into.

 October 6th, 10:00am

Global Studios: Dressing Room

“For the last time, must I act with such an incompetent rookie?” Miles looked at his manager, eyes narrowed fiercely in an attempt to assert his dissatisfaction at the current situation. “He’s not had any starring roles within the span of his career,” is what a quick IMDb search of the other’s peculiar name told the man. “In fact, I’ve never heard of him before.”

The girl sitting adjacent from him brought a dainty teacup to her lips, taking a sip of her tea before placing it back on its saucer with a cold clink, the cunningness of her eyes colliding with his own, “And like I have told you when you foolishly asked several foolish times before this, it is not within my control,” she shrugged, her mouth curling into a shit-eating grin, “You’ll just have to suck it up, little brother.”

Miles scoffed, but she had a point. It wasn’t his manager, Franziska Von Karma, hiring the cast for this movie, it was the director. This director was someone who he had worked with in the past and every single time, Miles had loved every single creative direction he had taken with the movie; as did the audience, each movie of his being met with positive reviews from viewers and film critics alike. Miles did not doubt his abilities and because of his positive reputation within the film industry, if he wanted to hire a rookie whose career only consisted of being an extra for a few scenes in a few big movies, all he could do was put his faith in him. However, just because he put his faith in him did not mean he approved.

He took a sip of his own tea, before he glanced at the expensive watch adorning his wrist. Today was their first proofreading of the script. There, Miles could finally see who this Phoenix Wright man was.

“Come now, you fool, or we’ll be late.” Franziska was already rolling up her whip in a neat circle and heading towards the door.

Miles put his tea cup down on the glass coffee table, moving his hands to fix his jabot as he stood up. Miles Edgeworth was a man with high standards, and whoever this Phoenix Wright was, Miles hoped he could meet his expectations.

 October 6th, 10:00am

Global Studios

Phoenix’s days couldn’t have been getting any better. The rookie actor was known for never being on time for anything—often receiving a scolding from Maya as a result—but just this once, he had managed to be punctual— if not a little early— for the one thing that mattered the most. He thanked god that he had the foresight to check whether or not he had set his alarm for A.M instead of P.M before he went to bed last night. Phoenix checked himself in the mirror once before he left the house; donning a plain white dress shirt and navy blue slacks. He adjusted the tie around his neck, the last thing he wanted to do was make a bad impression. Giving himself one final hurrah, encouraging himself in the mirror with “you can do this”, and “you got this”, he left his small flat with his head held high.

However, at this point in time, the closer he got to the time of the pre-production meeting, the more nervous he felt. He stood outside the meeting room, checking his wristwatch as he shifted in place from the heels of his feet to the balls of them.

“Nick!” Behind him, a set of hands placed themselves on his shoulder as a familiar energetic voice spooked him out of his nervousness, causing him almost to jump out of his skin. “Are you nervous?”

Phoenix peered over his left shoulder, unsurprised at who it was. It was Maya, who decided to meet him at the studio. If Phoenix had to go in there alone when his agent was perfectly capable of accompanying him, he would curse her to hell and back.

He clutched his chest, heart beating rapidly in his ears. Then, he relaxed and exhaled an exasperated sigh as if this has happened one too many times, “You scared me, Maya!” He exclaimed. “How many times are you going to do this?”

Even if he used the fingers on both of his hands to count all of the times Maya has done this to him before an audition or anytime he was nervous for that matter, he couldn’t. Mainly because for one, he had been to several auditions in the past few years; and two, he didn’t keep track of how many times she did. He stopped counting after the fifth time when he knew it would become a regular occurence.

“Would it be bad if I said never?” Maya giggled.

Phoenix sighed again, “I figured as much…”

“I’m sorry, Nick! It’s just so funny every single time. Remember that time before that one audition when I scared you so bad you spilled your cup of water all over yourself and it looked like you peed your pants-“

Before Maya could say anymore, Phoenix covered her mouth with his hand, wrenching it back in disgust after he felt something wet against his palm. Maya stuck out her tongue and grinned  childishly as Phoenix furiously wiped his hand against his pant leg. He exhaled, “If I asked you to let that go, I’d get the same answer as before, wouldn’t I?” At this point, defeat would be the only option to settle for.

She put her hands together like she always did and with a big smile on her face, she nodded, “You know me so well.”

The two of them continued their friendly banter, most of which consisted of bringing up terribly embarrassing events that had happened to them in the past in an attempt to embarrass the other. This calmed Phoenix’s nerves immensely; Maya always knew how to calm him down despite always scaring him half out of his wits.

“Are you nervous?” She asked, shifting the topic of conversation to something more relevant than reminiscing on their past embarrassments.

The question was like a reality slap, reawakening the butterflies he had thought he thoroughly rid himself of. “Of course, this is my first time ever getting something better than being an extra. A lot is riding on this, Maya.”

“It’s okay Nick!” She jabbed him lightly in the shoulder… Whatever her definition of “lightly” was. Phoenix rubbed his shoulder. That was definitely going to bruise over. “Just remember this, this is your big chance! Your break-through! Your primer!”

“I think you mean ‘premiere’...”

“All eyes will be on you! If you do great, then you’ll get more work!” She encouraged him, jumping to stand in front of him. She closed one of her eyes while she formed her fingers into a rectangular shape as if she were filming him. Even though it wasn’t a real camera, he still felt a little embarrassed, his cheeks flushing a light shade of pink. While he appreciated the sentiment, he knew where this was going.

“But…” He added on for her.

“But, if you mess up in your usual ‘Phoenix Wright Fashion’, then you can kiss your non-existent acting career goodbye!” She said in a type of pure adolescent innocence, putting her hands on her hips.

Phoenix shoved his face into his palm, “Thanks Maya…”  

“Any time.” She beamed at him, genuinely convinced that her words were words of encouragement instead of ones that felt like he had been stabbed in the heart.

Suddenly, as if something had caught in the corner of her eye, she looked down the hallway. “Psst, Nick!! Nick!!” She ecstatically whispered in a half-whisper-half-regular tone. “Is that Miles Edgeworth?!”

Phoenix followed her line of vision to the figure emerging from one of the many rooms down the hall. He knew that burgundy suit from anywhere, the feature that many people recognized him for. There was no one else in the world who could wear a suit that colour and could successfully pull it off, in Phoenix’s humble opinion.

The tall man stalked down the hallway accompanied by a shorter woman which Phoenix assumed to be his agent, Franziska von Karma. Although they weren’t close yet, he could feel the immense pressure in the air from the dignified aura that the two created. There was something intimidating about their aura, an elitist air that clearly separated the two individuals who were experienced in their field from the two weren’t-- almost as if it screamed ‘don’t talk to us’. Was that how it was around every famous actor?

“T-They’re coming closer to us! What do we do, Nick? Do we introduce ourselves?” Maya panicked, the words flying from her mouth at a mile per minute.

“Well, we are standing in front of the meeting room and from today on, he is our co-worker,” Phoenix whispered back to her, his tone more hushed than hers. “I think… I think we should greet them.” He suggested.

The two nodded as if they had come to an understanding by looking into each other’s eyes. Then, on the mental count of three that perfectly aligned with their arrival, Phoenix stiffly began, “Hi! I see we’ll be working together, Mr. Edgeworth. In that case, i-it’s nice to meet you!” He stuck out a hand, hoping the man would outstretch his own to shake it.

The man came to a stop and instead of getting a comforting smile and the handshake he desired, all Phoenix got was a piercing glare full of annoyance. “Mr. Wright,” he scoffed. “I would ask that you keep your interactions with me at a minimum and you do not waste my time by trying to talk to me.” With that, Edgeworth strode past him into the now open meeting room, his agent following behind him, smirking at Phoenix as she entered.

After recovering from the utter shock known as his first impression of the famous actor he had only seen on the big screen thus far, Phoenix turned to Maya, hoping that she would confirm that what just happened was just his mind’s cruel idea of a joke. Unfortunately, Maya nodded at him, confirming that what just happened was in fact not a figment of his imagination. For some reason, the famous Miles Edgeworth disliked the unknown rookie, Phoenix Wright.

‘What…’ Phoenix gulped. ‘What did I do..?!’

[heartfulmind]

name.     hitoshi shinsou. nickname.     none ... but he finds the thought of one very cute. gender.     male. romantic orientation.     demiromantic polyamorous. preferred pet names.     if his s/o were to come up with anything, best bet he will treasure it ♡ but you know he’d turn putty if called ‘kitten’ let’s be honest here. relationship status.     single pringle that doesn’t know how to mingle. favorite canon / fandom ship.     believe me when i say that i absolutely ship anyone with anyone ♡ im a total sucker and if you tell me two ( or idc how many ) characters that never interacted before, i’ll be more prone to ship it and be more enthusiastic about it than the main pairings.

like, sure, deku x shinsou is cute and kaminari x shinsou too (and if we’re honest here, anyone with shinsou is a rare-pair because he’s an obscure character) but if you even whisper to me kirishima x shinsou x tetsutetsu or shinsou x shoji or shinsou x momo i’ll give you my soul-

look, all im saying is that if it’s rare, i love it already. favorite crossover ship.     I ABSOLUTELY REFUSE TO ANSWER THIS ONE BECAUSE I KNOW I’LL SOUND LIKE SOME CORNY SHIPPER ... it’s like ... idk how to describe it, but imagine lightning mc queen x sonic the hedgehog. you see how corny that sounds? you feel me?- but if y’all ship them tho im totally cool with that it’s just that im feeling corny im so weird haha :’) a hint? i ship shinsou with a dude from a cult classic disney movie ... ‘OMG ULISES UR SO CHEESY’ I KNOW opinion on true love.     a lovely thing to exist in this universe. however, experiencing it for himself is such an intimidating thought. he has no relationships to base it off by but ofc every new experience is nerve-racking for anyone. at the end of the day, “you can’t help what your heart longs for.” shinsou will stay true to his motto. opinion on love at first sight.     it amazes him how there are people out there who can achieve this. he does not mock nor think anyone with this mindset is naive, not at all. surprisingly he infatuates himself but has to remind/suppress himself to just ... not? because he wouldn’t want to put anyone through that awkward if not uncomfortable ride of dealing with Him. he feels so undeserving but someone please show him that that’s not true please... how romantic are they ?     very! i know i never could portray this side of him, but believe me, if he is close friends with someone, shinsou would ... unintentionally flirt? but he doesn’t mean to? he just doesn’t know what being a best friend or a boyfriend is? if that makes sense- ex: your muse could be just a close friend and he would sit on your muses laps if he feels so comfy with them or kiss them because he would believe that your muses cheeks deserved that Kiss. he always hopes of singing and dancing to someone too so there’s that ♡ shinsou would be very vulnerable to anyone he is close to. he would just think that Highly of his close friends. ideal physical traits.   to shinsou, your muse is perfect ideal personality traits.     to just be yourself. a total cliche, i know but- it’s true. is your muse insecure? shinsou would be honored that they’re trusting something vulnerable to him. is your muse humorous? shinsou would be touched that they come up with jokes just to anticipate a laugh from someone quiet like himself. is your muse geeky? shinsou would be warmed up about how much enthusiasm your muse can be. i’ll go on forever ... unattractive physical traits.     this is a dumb asf question nobody better dare ask this to shinsou because nothing is ugly to him ♡ listen, if he likes you, he thinks you’re hot and that’s that. unattractive personality traits.     just ... don’t put others down- if you make anyone feel like they don’t belong in this universe you’re unsexy to shinsou. i bolded unsexy because im serious about this one. ideal date.     somewhere where only he and his s/o would know of. there’s an intimate feeling that comes about when the universe kinda just, revolves only around them both. can be in a secluded cave no one walked into, a rooftop of an abandoned cabin, his s/o’s bed, etc. a place they can call their own ♡ do they have a type ?     he thinks that his crushes are so unique, that they’re already their own Type. okay okay, if you’re a goth/punk or if you’re quiet or like to read books you get a head-start in the game average relationship length.     he’s never been in one, but if so, i imagine it long-term. although ... maybe the poly side of him can ruin some things ;; preferred non-sexual intimacy.     anything is pretty intimate to him. hand-holding? intimate. brushing hair? intimate. watching their s/o fall asleep first? intimate. making each other laugh at a restaurant date only to hear the other snort when they laugh? intimate. this question? goes answered improperly. commitment level.     this is like, his life yo idk if i have made this obvious enough opinion of public affection.     he wouldn’t be able to initiate anything at first, at all. not even hand-holding, a small kiss, or even looking at your muse because he knows he’ll get lost in them and turn into a sighing mess. sorry but your muses gotta take one for the team here and help shinsou bloom to be affectionate in public. past relationships ?     he’s never been in any to begin with.

tagged by: @ukubi​ OMG THANK YOU THANK YOU FOR TAGGING ME IN THIS ONE ♡♡♡ THIS ONE WAS SO MUCH FUN AND IT WAS SO INTERESTING ♡ I FEEL LIKE I DEVELOPED MY SHINSOU A BIT MORE .. LIKE IF I GOT A CHANCE TO GIVE CLARITY TO MY MUTUALS ... LOOK I JUST /SMOOCHES YOUR PRETTY FACE ♡

tagging: if you’re seeing this. please give it a shot and tag me because this is so much fun and i want y’all to love your muses they deserve it pls ♡

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Psycho Analysis: The Sanderson Sisters

(WARNING! This analysis contains SPOILERS!)

Ah, Hocus Pocus, everyone’s favorite campy Halloween cult classic. Objectively speaking, the movie is probably no better than a made-for-TV cheesy 90s Disney movie – and funnily enough, this film’s director would go on to make plenty more of those, seeing as he would do the High School Musical movies and The Descendants – as it has all the hokey writing, late 80s/early 90s cliches you’d expect, and some truly boring main characters.

But, thankfully, it has three of the most charismatic women you could imagine camping it up and firmly cementing their status as Halloween icons for all time: The Sanderson sisters, Winifred, Sarah, and Mary. These three are the reason this movie is held so near and dear to people’s hearts, and frankly, without them this movie would just plain suck. With them, it still sucks, but in a fun way, elevating it beyond “so bad it’s good” and into the realm of endearing camp alongside such masterpieces as Venom.

But enough of all this; just like when you’re watching the movie, you’re here for the girls, so let’s talk about them.

Actor: The leader of the bunch is Winifred, and she is played by Bette Midler. Bette Midler has called this her favorite role ever, and seeing how she acts in this, it really shows. A running theme with these three is that they just absolutely ham it up, and Bette Midler goes above and beyond with Winifred – she’s not just a ham, she’s the whole damn hog. In fact, in a lot of ways, she hogs the spotlight, what with her hamminess being so magnetic and the fact that she is clearly the brains of the operation. But that’s not to say the others are bad.

Sarah Jessica Parker plays… Sarah. Funny how that worked out. She is the hot and dumb one, and boy oh boy does she play that role to perfection, though of course she does manage to be creepy and sinister when the scene calls for it – that song of hers has become iconic for a reason.

Finally we come to Mary, played by none other than Peggy Hill herself, Kathy Najimy. Najimy does a great job, she plays her role well, but out of the three I feel like she has the most trouble standing out. Which isn’t to say she’s bad, far from it – she doesn’t have the bombastic personality of Winifred nor the complete ditziness of Sarah.

Here’s the thing, though: if any of these three weren’t here, or weren’t portrayed by these specific actresses, they’d fall apart, the movie would fall apart, game over man, game over! The film only works because these three have such great chemistry, such great interactions, and such great weirdness to them that if even one of them were gone or they just weren’t in synch, things would be a lot less fun.

Motivation/Goals: Like most evil witches in fiction, these three want children, specifically so that they can drain their vitality with a magic potion so that they can be young and powerful forever. This gets them hanged 300 years before the main story starts, and when they come back, they reuse this goal with a bit more urgency: they now need to drain the vitality from children before the sun rises and turns them to dust, as their resurrection is set to only last a single night otherwise. Frankly, the fact that their goal is killing and sucking the life out of children is the only thing that’s keeping the audience from rooting for them, because the actual protagonists of this film are so unremarkable and cliché that it’s pretty hard to want to see them stop the funny and charismatic witches,

Personality: Winifred is clearly the one who got all the brains, which makes sense as she is the leader. She’s a lot quicker on the uptake and realizes things more quickly than her ditzier sisters, as well as a lot more proactive and pragmatic in general. She does the spellcasting, she brews the potions, she just inhabits the role of leader naturally. It helps that of the three she has the most outwardly intimidating presence.

Mary is the middle child, and her personality is somewhere between the two sisters: she’s ditzy, but not to Sarah’s level, and she’s got some common sense and wits, but definitely not on Winifred’s level. This is kind of why I said she has a hard time sticking out personality-wise before, as she’s the epitome of the awkward middle child. However, she does excel at her role as a predatory child tracker, able to sniff out their victims with ease. It’s also implied, but not outright stated, that she’s a much bigger eater than her sisters; she is noticeably chunkier than the others, after all. And considering their diet… it’s definitely not a good idea to undersell that Mary is definitely a wicked witch.

Then we come to Sarah, who is an absolute ditz and the epitome of a dumb blonde… and yet, she is also one of the most dangerous, as she has a sort of siren-like power to draw children to her with her singing. In fact, while she does come off as a ditzy goofball for the most part, her interactions with children paint a rather… uncomfortable picture, one that reveals her true nature.

I think it’s worth noting that despite how ditzy both Mary and Sarah are, both of them also have the common sense to point out to Winifred that, when Sarah has called numerous children to their house, they really don’t need to bother with the protagonists anymore. In this moment, Winifred decides to reject common sense and go after them because one of the heroes called her ugly. It sort of highlights just how petty and irrational Winifred can be, and how despite her disdain for her sisters, she’s really not so different from them in the end. It’s also worth noting that Mary and Sarah, while clearly evil due to their association with Winifred, are actually pretty nice and mostly harmless otherwise, to the point where you could make a case that without Winifred around, they’d probably not be villains at all.

But if that were the case, we wouldn’t have a movie, and then we wouldn’t be here, huh?

Final Fate: Of course these three fail to suck out any vitality by sunrise, with Winifred’s stupid little vendetta damning her and her sisters. The rays of the sun turn Winifred to a statue and cause Sarah and Mary to explode, with Mary even getting a moment to wave goodbye in resigned sadness as she bursts into a dust cloud. After her sisters are gone, Winifred’s statue explodes spectacularly.

Best Scene: I don’t think there’s really anything that comes close to the sister’s spellbinding performance of “I Put a Spell On You,” at least in regards to all three of them together. I mean, if you get a singer like Bette Midler to star as a villain in your movie, why would you not have her sing? Only a complete hack who doesn’t know how to properly utilize actors would waste a singer in a role where they don’t sing.

The thing is, these three are together all the time, so there’s not much room for individual moments for them to shine otherwise… or there wouldn’t be, if they didn’t showcase Sarah’s absolutely terrifying power, leading her number “Come Little Children” to being her standout moment, and the moment that really drives home the incredibly uncomfortable undertones she exudes.

Best Quote: I think Winifred gets the best quote in the whole movie, which occurs when her zombified ex Billy Butcherson (played by Doug Jones, who you may remember for his critically acclaimed role as Mac Tonight in the McDonald’s ads). Billy tells her to go to hell, and she retorts with: “Oh! I've been there, thank you. I found it quite lovely.”

Sarah, of course, has her villain song: “Come little children, I'll take thee away / Into a land of enchantment / Come little children, the times come to play / Here in my garden of magic.”

And, unfortunately, in this regard I think Mary gets the shaft. Despite her definitely being funny and entertaining, she just doesn’t have the same level of standout quotes as her sisters.

Final Thoughts & Score: So as I was writing this, I was thinking of what their score could possibly be. I thought I’d probably have to lower their score, because aside from them, this movie is just corny early 90s cheese… but then I thought, what’s wrong with that? And why should these three suffer a lower score due to the rest of the movie’s failings? That isn’t their fault. Hell, these three are the reason to watch the movie. If anything, the movie’s failings are drowned out by just how charismatic and enjoyable they are to watch.

Much like their fellow child-hating hag the Grand High Witch, the Sanderson sisters are blessed with fun, funny, charismatic actors who aren’t afraid to ham things up and know just what kind of move they’re in and absolutely revel in it. They saw they were playing three stereotypical fairy tale witches and decided to have a blast with it, and in doing so they managed to transform an otherwise corny Disney film into the Halloween legend that this film is. I wouldn’t say these three are particularly deep or complex, but they have a very fun dynamic and add a lot of spice to an otherwise bland plot. Between them and Doug Jones, they give you a lot of reasons to come back and watch this film over and over.

Obviously, these three are getting a 9/10, only held back from a perfect score because yes, sometimes the camp can be a bit much, even for me. But I’m just not heterosexual enough to give these three ladies anything lower. I still have to unfortunately say Mary is the weak link here, but it’s only comparatively speaking, and I’d probably bump these three down to a 7 if she wasn’t here. I really can’t stress enough that there dynamic is so utterly important that even one of them not being there would spoil things. They just don’t make evil trios like this anymore.