#it also really makes me want a orange Creamsicle

[fangomango]

Maybe it's just me who thinks its weird because I've yet to see anyone say anything about it but like..

Our Minor League Baseball team here for our city...every so often changes its name to "Honey butter chicken biscuit"

Yknow the food you buy at Whataburger

And maybe it makes sense for our city as we're the birthplace of that bright ol' fast food chain (I forgot about that ngl) but like...

It's weird right?

Like does... Baldwin Park, California have an In and Out baseball team? (That's where In and Out was founded)

Is it just texas

I mean its probably just a thing they were paid to do but I still find it weird

[inkdrinkerworld]

jack of all trades

wc: 3.7k

pairing: handyman!james x teacher!reader [though can be read as any reader]

cw: fluff, life mishaps, handyman!james, mention of a break in, family dynamics [healthy], mention of food

You were fucked. You should’ve just called a plumber from the beginning.

Now your pipes were all wrinkled and your sink wasn’t draining.

Your heart was in your throat as you pulled out your phone and called your brother, Michael.

“Do you know any plumbers? My sink’s pipe is fucked,” you send him a picture and he chuckles down the line. Your brother is a mechanic, but he's got friends in many places.

Places you hope include wherever they hire plumbers.

“Yeah, I’ll call someone. Make sure you don’t use it again, dummy.” you nod, chewing at your cuticle.

“Thanks,” your voice shakes and you know your brother is frowning.

Life had been fucking you with no prep for the last couple months. Someone had broken into your house almost five weeks ago, stolen a couple small pieces of jewellery and fucked with your locks.

You’d had to change the locks, your front door and you’d taken to sleeping in the living room with a three inch knife under your pillow.

That had put you out of money for groceries and your brother had taken over doing it for you till you could again.

Now you can’t wash your dishes and your anxiety is all over the place.

“Stop it, go get ice cream or something. I’ll come over with him if he can swing it, okay?”

“You're the best,” you say earnestly and he chuckles, “I’ll buy shit to make the buns you like as payment.”

Your brother doesn’t deny himself the delicacy- it had taken a while for you to get back into doing things that made you happy and he was also a sucker for them.

“I’ll text you what he says, be safe. Love you.”

You return the sentiment and head out, double checking that you’d locked the gate and the front door.

You’d gotten a pint of orange creamsicle, and a pint of caramel biscuit and cream before getting the stuff to make the buns for your brother.

As you set them all down on your counter your phone pings off.

‘He can come tomorrow morning at 9, I’ll come with him. He’s a good guy though, don’t worry.’

You send your brother a thumbs up and then he sends you a photo of the man you suppose is coming to fix your pipes. He’s good looking, his hair is long in the photo, tied back in a low bun but there’s curls on his forehead. Another thing you notice is how massive he is. He’s broad and muscular but in the photo you’re looking at he’s got a warm smile on his face that shows off a dimple.

He looks friendly enough. Maybe tomorrow won’t be so bad.

You try to sleep in your bed, you don’t want your brother to notice that you’re still on the sofa in the morning, but being so far from the door makes your heart clench and you find yourself dragging your blanket out to the sofa that you’re sure by now has your body’s impression.

“Last night,” you say to yourself as you cuddle your pillow and tuck your blankets under your chin.

Your alarm has you groaning. 6:30 is a nice time, but not so nice when you don’t actually have to go into the preschool to teach, but for parent meetings at 11. Rubbing your eyes, you sit up, legs already moving to the kitchen to set the kettle on.

You go through your morning routine and only feel alive when you have a cup of tea and a bite of the last of sourdough toast you’d made last week. Your phone rings and you already know it’s your brother, “Yes I’m awake, dork.” he might be older than you by four years but you’re really close so the teasing is nice.

“Open the door then, and make sure you have on your glasses.” you flip him off over the phone but walk across the floor, glasses on, to unlock the door.

“Where’s your key?” you ask as you open the door, finding your brother holding two brown paper bags and the man in the photo standing next to him in grimy coveralls.

“I hooked it on the look of my pants, James was being prudish about touching me.”

“I wasn’t,” the beefy man starts, jingling his toolkits as an answer. His voice is nice, deep, cherry and his drawl is a little slow, but still very pleasant.

“Come in,” you step to the side and open the door wider. “Don’t worry about him, he just likes people touching him.” your brother scowls but doesn’t deny it.

“Don’t laugh when you see it, this one already did. I know it’s bad.” you say nervously as James sets down his stuff.

“S’fine, can’t be much worse than some of the other stuff I’ve seen.”

“Come eat, I got you that breakfast cake thing you like.” your brother sets the box before you, sliding over your cup of tea and a bottle of orange juice.

“Did you eat?” you eye him as you sit on the island.

“Shanice made eggs and toast.” you love your future sister-in-law, but the mention of her in the kitchen has enough merit to make your stomach roll in discomfort and your body to produce a gag.

“There’s chicken salad in the fridge and the bread’s there too,” you turn to James, “Do you want anything to eat, James? There’s vegan stuff in the fridge too if you don’t eat meat.”

Your brother rolls his eyes, “He could eat an entire chicken if he really wanted to.” You’re positive there’s a small blush on James’ face. He’s even prettier in person and you’re really trying not to stare.

His hair is tied back like it was in the photo, inky curly spirals slipping out around his ears and the nape of his neck. His eyes are a shade of brown that reminds you of sand- dark but flecked with lighter hues; he’s captivating.

He’s almost as wide as your fridge and his arms are huge, but he looks soft, even with all the corded muscles. You will your eyes not to linger on his hands.

Your brother makes himself a triple sandwich and takes one of your iced teas.

“I’m alright,” he eyes your cup of tea, “I could do with a cuppa though.” you nod and set the kettle on.

“One sugar or two?” He holds up a single finger before opening the cupboards. He hisses and you suppose that’s better than the laugh that bursts from your brother.

“S’not that bad,” you can tell he’s being extra nice when he sees the embarrassed look on your face, “I’ll have to change all the pipes though. Whoever installed these ones used really thin PVC so under the heat it crumpled.” James stands and accepts the tea from the dainty mug without a complaint.

“Will it be super expensive?” you ask, and your brother flicks your forehead. “What? You know I can’t afford many more swings right now.” You only feel a twinge of embarrassed heat licking at your neck as you look between James and Michael.

“You’re such an idiot, I’ll go half with you.” He says and you nod, giving him your best smile but your brother draws the line when you try to hug him.

“It won’t be, but I can’t do it today. The better pipes have to be ordered in, but they only take like a day to get here.” James explains and you nod.

“That’s fine, I’ve got most of my stuff already cooked so there won’t be much dishwashing.” James finishes the tea and pulls out a pen and paper from his bag. “Here’s my number, you can text me in like two days about it if I don’t call Michael first.”

You nod again, thanking him as he gathers all his stuff and moves for the door. Your brother waves him away and then turns to you, frowning.

“You still sleeping on the sofa?” It’s then that you realise you hadn’t put your blanket or your pillow away and scowl.

“I can’t sleep in the bed, my mind just runs wild.” you say as you finish your tea and cake. “I’ve been trying though.”

The door shuts and you realise James has probably heard what you’ve said. Your mouth can’t seem to not run away from you when he’s around.

You brush the slight shame away with the semi-reassuring thought that ‘at least he doesn’t know why a grown woman can’t sleep in her own bed,’ it doesn’t last long, but it mellows the initial sting.

Michael ruffles your hair and you shrug, “It’ll just take some time,” he says softly, “Want me to get a security system?” You shake your head at that.

“You’re already going half and half with me on this, and you paid for my groceries for like three weeks. I’ll be okay.”

Your brother doesn’t look convinced, but he can’t argue with you because his phone rings.

“Work, I gotta go, but think about it okay? Shanice won’t mind either,” you nod but you both know you won’t be thinking about anything.

“Have a good day at work, I’ll bake those buns the second the sink’s all good.”

-

You’re coming back from work the next day when your phone rings, an unknown number. You frown and then realise it might be James.

“Hello?”

“Hi, angel. This is James,” he says, like you’ve forgotten his name over the last twenty four hours.

“Hi James, is everything okay?” you ask, shoving a couple folders into your bag from the passenger seat of your car.

“Yeah, was calling about the pipes. I’ve just picked them up and I’m near-by. Would you mind at all if I came to install them today?”

You stick the key in the ignition, “I wouldn’t mind, but I’m about twenty minutes from my house, would you wait?”

You really hope he can, you want this problem resolved as soon as possible.

“I can, angel. Don’t sweat it,” he says before he hangs up. You do a happy shimmy in your seat before pulling out of the school’s parking lot.

Next, you call Michael.

“James is coming over to fix the pipes today, just in case you know, I go missing or something.”

Your brother laughs, “He’s a sweetheart. Maybe stop listening to your crime podcasts, you’re getting even more morbid.”

“Oh whatever, I’ll stop by tomorrow with the buns.”

“Make sure you get some sleep,”

“Yeah yeah, I’m going now.”

James is in his car when you pull up, a bronco that looks very well kept. “Sorry for the wait,” you say as you unlock your door.

“S’fine, had enough time to have a late lunch.”

You check your watch, “It’s almost four James, that’s more like an early dinner.”

The man lifts his shoulder and drops it with a smile, “It’s been one of those days.”

“Do you want a cup of tea or iced tea?” you ask as you open your fridge. “I should warn you though, they’re addictive.”

“What flavour iced tea do you have?” you smile, James might be someone else you get hooked on them.

“Peach, hibiscus and I think I see one last cucumber melon.”

“Which is your favourite?”

“Peach! It’s not really that sweet though, but if you like it super sweet maybe hibiscus would be better.”

James smiles at the way you ramble as he opens up his toolkit and then the pipes.

“I’ll take the peach angel,” you pass him the glass bottle after tipping it upside down. James takes a long sip and sighs, “That’s good.” you nod and then move to take out a bowl of rice and chicken.

“Do you need me to get anything? To help?” you ask and James shakes his head.

“Not right now,” you think about going to eat before asking,

“Can I watch? Just to know what you’re doing?” then you back track as James doesn’t say anything.

“Not because I don’t trust you to do it well, I just like knowing. Like with my door, I learned how to put it up when I had to change it,” you realise you’re rambling when James smiles and his dimple is visible through his stubble.

“You can watch angel, you can hand me the tools I’ll need.”

You and James make a good team- you’d been nervous at first and then when James was so close you could smell his coconutty cologne you felt your head go a little light but almost two hours later, your pipes were changed.

“Moment of truth is if the water goes down,” you say as you stand, knees cracking in the process.

James nods, “You’re not a bad assistant, if you ever change professions I’ll put in a good word for you.”

You beam at that before opening up the tap and letting the water flow. Not even a drop of it pools in the sink and your heart feels like a feather floating away in the breeze.

“You did it!” you turn to James with a pleased smile and he blushes. “Thank you, thank you, thank you!” you exclaim and he chuckles, already packing up his toolkit.

“You’re welcome angel, Michael already paid by the way.”

You shake your head at your brother’s actions, but you can’t find it in you to be upset, not when your sink is fixed. “Can I entice you to have dinner then? I’ll feel bad if you just go,” you tack on when James doesn’t answer. “I’ve got pizza or taco bowls.” you sing-song and that breaks him.

“What kind of pizza?”

It’s how James ends up on your sofa, overalls hanging off his hips, revealing a dark red compression shirt as he holds his plate.

Your blanket is still on the sofa, but you shove it to the armchair.

“Wanna watch anything specific? I’m going through Christmas movies right now,” James’ eyes are wide at your confession.

“It’s the middle of August,” you nod and bite your bar-b-que chicken pizza.

“I’m making a short list of Christmas movies for this Christmas. Last three years in a row I did one.”

James grins, “So I take it you like the season.”

You nod, “If you ask Michael, he’d tell you I was obsessed with it,” you shrug, setting down the slice of pizza.

“When we were kids, I used to go crazy about it. Write letters to Santa with our address and mail it, play Christmas songs all through the month and I was a little excessive with the decorations- especially when I started working and could buy the ones I wanted. It just always feels like a good time- eternal joy and hope and all that jazz I guess.”

James looks around your house now and finds a few trinkets in the space and for a moment he can imagine it decked out for Christmas. “I can see it,” he groans as he takes a bite. “That’s delicious, angel.”

Your face gets hot under the compliment and you give James a small smile.

“What are you watching now?” he asks, taking another bite.

“The Holiday,” you search for the remote and find the movie. “It makes the shortlist every year, but it’s so good.”

James and you watch the remaining forty five minutes, and he nudges your shoulder during the sad parts so you don’t let the tears in your eyes fall.

“Do you think people rent that cottage?” He asks you and you frown.

“I dunno, but if it’s for rent it’ll be so nice! It’s so cosy looking.”

James doesn’t point out that your house looks just as cosy. It reminds him of the houses you see in magazines- not the boring ones that’s all one colour and minimalistic, but the ones that seem to be alive with colour and things.

He’s sure they all serve a purpose- the small statues in one corner near your window, the coasters that look like flowers, it all seems to complement you and your home and James thinks to himself, ‘this is what a home should be.’

He stretches as he stands and you do as well, reaching for his plate that he doesn’t give. Instead he takes your own and walks to the kitchen.

“You’re a guest, guests don’t do the dishes.” you try to get your plate back but it’s no use, James is already washing them and stacking them in the draining board.

“Thanks for dinner angel,” he picks up his toolkit and the bucket of parts that need to be tossed out.

“You’re welcome, thanks for fixing my pipes.”

James waves it off, “I’d say we should do this again sometime, but changing your pipes so frequently isn’t ideal.”

It isn’t till after you hear the innuendo in his words. You do laugh a little in the moment, so James counts it as a win. Your laugh reminds him of that fairy in the show his niece loves- a sweet tinkering, bell-like sound that makes him smile.

“It was nice though. You’re good company.”

You walk James to the door, “Make sure and lock up,” he says kindly and you nod.

You notice that you don’t hear his boots don’t move till he hears the locks click and your heart flutters stupidly at the action.

You can’t like him already, you barely know him. A voice in the back of your head says, “But he’s already so dreamy,” you’re very inclined to agree.

-

You’d thought that would’ve been the last time you saw James too, but three weeks later, he’s at your brother’s house for his summer party and you’re fucked all over again.

He’s not a bad sight to be greeted with, arms exposed in his black tank top and his thighs. They’re thick and you can see the outline of muscle on them, even from far away. There’s a couple smattering of tattoos that peak from the hem of his shorts and you have to stop yourself from drooling.

He’s laughing at something Shanice is telling him, and he looks even more gorgeous.

It should be illegal, you think to yourself, for the man to look that effortlessly beautiful.

“You made it!” Michael says, handing you the drink in his hand before gesturing for you to follow him.

“You said if I didn’t come you’d have called me non-stop. I love you, but that’s annoying.” Michael leads you over to his fiance and James. You hug Shanice and wave politely at James.

Conversation is easy, and James hopes he’s being discrete as his gaze falls to you a little longer than necessary. You catch him once, and the look in his eyes confuses you just a little.

You don’t think badly of yourself, but you’re just in a pair of jean shorts and the top of your bikini- a pretty pink colour, after you’d read an article about lifeguards having a hard time spotting people in pools and the ocean if they had on blues and greens- is exposed by your lack of shirt.

In any case, you didn’t think it was cause for his stares to linger and look so… primal if that was even the right word.

Michael says, “James, do you know any good alarm systems?” as you sip your peach iced tea and vodka. You elbow your brother as James nods.

“There’s a few out there that I’d recommend, why?”

“Don’t,” you murmur to Michael who ignores you entirely.

Your brother doesn’t hesitate as he says, “Someone broke into her house a couple weeks ago and she hasn’t been able to sleep in her room since.”

“Yeah, just talk about me like I’m invisible,” you mutter and James feels anger and fury for you fester in his chest. It blooms rapidly and takes him by surprise.

“You’re not invisible, you’re just a hard head.” your brother says, James is inclined to agree as well- especially after the portion of the conversation he had overheard that first day you met.

“I can stop by the hardware tomorrow if you want, should have some of the ones I usually recommend.”

Your brother smirks and you feel shame and something you can’t yet name balloon your belly.

“Thank you, James,” you say as you finish off your vodka iced tea, already feeling for another one.

As the food comes out, you help yourself; ensuring to avoid James’ gaze because over the last couple weeks he’s seemed to come to know a lot of the bad things about your life. You pile watermelon and pineapple on one side of your plate before picking some fries and a bar-b-que chicken breast. Your hand reaches for a lemonade when a bigger one grabs it.

“I got it angel,” James’ own plate is full too. More meat than fruit but it’s fuel either way so it doesn’t bother you. “Where’re you sitting?”

You point to the seat near the pool.

“You don’t have to be so nice, James. Michael’s mouth is just too big for his own good.”

James rolls his eyes, “I’m not being nice because of him,” he says, taking the seat beside you and handing over your lemonade after cracking the seal. “Or because I fixed your pipes, or anything else.”

You frown as you chomp on a piece of watermelon. “You’re not?”

James shakes his head, digging into his food.

You squint at him and James chuckles, “No, you should feel safe in your house.”

You don’t say anything much after that, overwhelmed by his care- even if you’re stopping yourself from reading too far into it.

“You’re real sweet, James.” you say after a while, spearing a look at him to find his eyes already on you; that same kind of hungry look in his eyes like earlier.

“Yeah?” he hums and for a moment you want him to kiss you. You want to feel the press and the heat of his lips on yours, then you catch the thought. You hardly know him. But you want him and him coming over to install the security system might not go as smoothly as the plumbing had gone. You find you wouldn’t mind if James does something other than install the alarm system.

“Yeah.”

[blimbo-buddy]

Tallstar is Jake's boyfriend but also not. They both felt mutual attraction but they never took the next step so it's not official. They yearned but alas!

Tale I imagine has the similar markings to Tallstar but they're orange and white instead of being a tuxedo.

Tale is an adventurous little guy like his siblings and more interested in the clans than Rusty is if there were possible lol.

Rusty, Matilda, Filou, Tommy, and Luna are great older siblings to Tale and often play near the forest and in the fields.

Tale's favorite snack is Crickets!

The kingdoms have recipes they made.

One of the first things they did learn was that you can boil their kibble into water and soften it into a mush. They created stews and experimented with adding different things.

They recreated some human foods like desserts and bread.

They're evolving at a pace. A slow pace but considered the state they were at during Mapleshade's Vengeance timeline, they're a lot better than before lmao

What are some recipe ideas you have that cats would enjoy and make?

Ah, I see I see. I'd imagine the clans would not like it if one of their leaders was openly with a Kittypet. Man, imagining a scenario where TallStar ends up changing and he's like "Sorry babe but I don't yearn anymore lol I'm a true clan cat" and Jake's standing there cartoonishly clutching flowers trying not to cry.

Also I think that's neat with how Tale looks! I dunno why but I always thought orange and white looked the best with cats, especially if they're a very specific sort of orange. Reminds me of this stray cat who came by often and he was a really cool shade of orange with some white undersides, nick named him Creamsicle. I like Tale's older siblings being great like that and letting his adventuring nature run wild (with proper supervision of course), seems like Tale likes crickets because he found a cricket one time and didn't hesitate to crunch down on it.

Also gotta appreciate some good recipes that would be appealing to cats. Chop up some vegetables and boil in some bones and that's a perfect stew to sip on for when the days and nights start getting colder. The vitamins also help with cats who are sick, number 1 thing that you'd be recommended if you came down with a flu. I'd definitely imagine it took alot of trial and error to figure out what the cats can and can't eat when recreating human cuisines and desserts. They'd probably be shocked that humans don't drop dead from things that can easily kill an animal (Like mint).

I've mentioned them before but I got a few:

The crickets that are becoming a popular snack in Warriorclan/Present day Chelford

Dry cat food mixed with an egg or two, garnished with Rosemary. Simmered over medium heat

A buttery breakfast bun that is mildly sweet. Glazed with a thin layer of honey

Lots and lots of differing kinds of jerky. A nice, tough snack to chew on, helps keep your brain active too so that's a plus

Only ever accessible during winter season (Though there is also the option of stealing from freezers, but that's difficult 90% of the time), meat and fish ice pops for everybody!

For a delicious, crunchy or chewy starting dish: Dried, fried, or boiled bird's feet or rat/mouse tail. Twolegplace cats, like clan cats and outsider cats, value every single part of the prey item

Cooked bones that are cracked open so that the marrow inside can easily be slurped out

It's important to remember that the things that cats may enjoy, we as humans will see as gross. Cats in this case won't make the exact same food as we do, they'll most often than not have their own feline-twist to the dish that also falls in line with what they can and can't ingest. Though, that part's up to you if you want to have the Kittypet Kingdom cats evolve to grow stronger systems and become slightly more immune/unaffected to specific things that may make them fall ill

[sidsthekid]

9 people you’d like to get to know better

thanks for the tag @yabagofmilfs and @zhenya4sid !!! <3

List 3 ships you like: just 3? dern. sidnate, natejo and ... i've been thinking about cale and ej a lot. the rookie and vet trope persists in me, body and soul. but obviously my list of ships stretches way beyond the ones listed.

First ship ever: oh maaan. i think it was kpop-related. all my first ships were when i delved into fandom by way of asianfanfiction dot net

Last song you heard: agora hills by doja cat. something about it makes me feel very nice and hot when i workout! like i could rule the world!

Favorite childhood book: there were...a lot, HAHA. percy jackson, hunger games series... and i know it's not technically a 'book' but i adored the sailor moon comics. the art is so beautiful and i'd always daydream about looking like sailor mars cause we both had black hair and i thought she was so pretty.

Currently reading: so i was reading the crossing by cormac mccarthy because i really liked all the pretty horses but then work got crazy and i haven't been able to pick it up. i want to finish the series, though!

Currently watching: the bear (again). i was also re-watching some episodes of what we do in the shadows because i saw renfield on a plane and it made me miss my dear guillermo!!

Currently consuming: an orange creamsicle bar :):)

Currently craving: a chocolate silk pie. i've been wanting a slice so fuckin bad

tagging (and no obligation to do!! this is just for fun): @yippayappa@puckingembarrassing @thekookster @dadvans @annieqattheperipheral @behindallthings @blackholesun @rustasche @diningchairs

[aenariasbookshelf]

you say you want (me) (part seven of ?)

title: you say you want (me) (part seven of ?)

author: Aenaria

rating: G

Weekly prompt: Cherry week at the @darcylewisbingohq

Characters: Darcy Lewis, Steve Rogers

tags/warnings: Darcy/Steve, soulmate AU

Summary: In a world where having a soulmate mark is the norm for most people, Darcy Lewis is one of the rare few unmarked people. Of course, this doesn’t stop her from finding the right partner. 

Previous parts can be found here: https://www.tumblr.com/aenariasbookshelf/719213889614708736

I really should put these ficlets into some sort of order and get them posted to AO3, shouldn't I?

*

“I can’t believe you’re taking me to Staten fucking Island for a date.”

“No, I took you to Brooklyn for a date, we’re making a quick stop for dessert before heading back to the compound. Besides, you said you liked Italian ice; this place supposedly has some of the best around.”

Darcy just rolls her eyes bemusedly as she hops out of the passenger seat of the inconspicuous black SUV. Steve shuts the door behind her and they begin to walk down the street to where the Italian ice place of legend is. He slings an arm around her shoulders and pulls her close, providing a little bit of extra warmth in the chill of the fall evening.

The place is surprisingly crowded, people waiting on various lines inching towards the ordering counter. Steve tugs his baseball cap just a little bit lower and makes sure that the lensless glasses are still on his face. Darcy privately thinks it’s the dumbest disguise ever, but it seems to work better than imagined. But also, maybe it’s because people don’t expect to see someone as famous and well known as Captain America doing something as normal as going out to dinner or getting some ice cream. Which is both a curse and a blessing in itself.

Still, Darcy notices a couple of sly glances tossed their way that she’s not quite sure what to make of. So she just stays curled into Steve’s side as they wait their turn.

This being New York (even if they are in a part that Darcy would barely consider a part of the city) however, no one says anything and soon enough they’re walking back to the car, icy cold treats in hand. She licks at the ice, orange creamsicle flavors melting on her tongue, cold and creamy and a nice little kick of nostalgia. For just a moment, she’s a child on the boardwalk with her parents, tucking into some Italian ice after spending a long day baking on the beach, getting sand in every crevice and her hair tangled from salt water.

Maybe next summer she can take Steve to the beach also. He needs a vacation more than anyone she knows.

There’s a soft noise next to her, and she sees Steve looking down at her, a soft smile on his face, pink lips made even redder from the cherry ice he’s been eating. “What are you thinking?” he asks.

“I’m thinking I want to, when it’s warmer out, show you the beach where I grew up. And we can just spend a day there being lazy and warm and there’s nothing more important than the water in front of us and the sun in the sky.” Fanciful, yes, but that’s her deepest secret, after all. 

That for all her feelings about soulmates being an entire and utter racket, Darcy Lewis is still a romantic at heart.

“In the summer then,” Steve nods. “We’ll make a tradition out of it.” There’s a little flush on his cheeks, just barely visible under the yellow glow of a street light, but it’s the same shade as the cherry on his lips.

“In the summer,” Darcy agrees, grinning. “In the meantime - it’s a Friday night. Neither one of us is working tomorrow. We don’t really need to rush back to the compound, do we?”

Steve shakes his head slowly. “No, no rush at all,” he smirks.

When he bends down to kiss her, he tastes like cherries.

[wiseatom]

The end of the year is near! Give a shoutout to your favorite blogs and tag them to spread positivity before the year ends! (from: a secret anon)

ALMOST FORGOT 2 DO THIS LITERALLY RUNNING AND SHAKING AND SWEATING!!! i am putting this under a read more so that i don’t clog the dash but you can catch me in 4k for the second time tonight below the cut:

yes i just rambled abt some of these people. no i do not care. starting with people i have probably interacted with enough to be weird about:

@bylertruther - HI DENISE IT’S ME AGAIN. denise bylertruther my one true love…my first mutual fr fr….ii have screenshots of every nice thing you’ve ever said to me (real) (not clickbait). i hope tht i am in top fans on your blog bc if i am not that is a crime but i’ll do better denise i swear i will. grabs you by the shoulders and shakes you so gently I AM OBSESSED W YOU U HAVE NO IDEA. every take is so true and real and i am constantly in awe like damn ok maybe i should be watching this show like denise bylertruther is. The strongest byler soldier imo and simultaneously every single person on the frontline for will byers. i know they said no new charas in s5 but i think they should really and truly reconsider that stance just so that they can write you into the show bc 1. you deserve it n 2. i want to see mike wheeler bark at u for daring 2 talk 2 will. ty for being correct always and so funny. i am biting you every day and reiterating that every fic i write is actually for you, the Original wiseatom stan,

@andiwriteordie - i say this with all the love and affection and positive connotation in the world, but andi, you are THE most insane person i have ever met, and i am obsessed with you. you are such a pleasure to talk to and bounce ideas off of and just be absolutely batshit insane with, and you are?? crazy talented?? literally SO creative, and your willpower is so admirable 2 me. the amount of fics you churn out is impressive on its own, but the fact that every single one of them is so beautifully written and makes me cry?? even when it’s fluff??? you are also, of course, one of the first fic authors i read for byler - i remember reading the let’s hear it for the boys series on lunch breaks at work over the summer and just like. being obsessed with the way you wrote them and how real it felt, like i was reading from the show. i have done jumping jacks reading your fics. it’s embarrassing. i will continue to do jumping jacks reading your fics. it will continue to be embarrassing. anyway the point is i cherish you and your fics and our friendship so much! punting you into the sun bc i cannot bear to look at you anymore!

@astrobei - suniiii suni suni SUNNNNIIIII. my orange creamsicle my taco bell cheesy roll up my bread puddinggggg. i don’t think i hav ever connected w a person as quickly as we have connected. like wtf we are just. the same person in different fonts n it’s cruel tht we live 3000 miles away bc i just want to wrap you up in my bindle n carry you every where i go. my real n true little sister. thank you for having an aneurysm every time i send u a snippet and for telling me tht i am funny because i need the attention. with that said i would also like to say that i have an aneurysm any time i read ANYTHING you write and you are also SO funny. ty for pioneering cringefail losercore byler and just like. breathing so much life n love into your fics. every single one is just a little love letter to stranger things n i am so thankful for the ones i’ve read and can’t wait to catch up and then immediately go on a 35 mile drive abt it.

@bookinit02 - i would like to state, on the record, that before i knew haven bookinit, i read baby we’re perfect and had such a breakdown over it that i literally blacked it out in my mind. like, i was reading it in line at the starbucks at work, and i was crying in the starbucks at work, in front of guests, n then i went back to my office w my little coffee and cried some more and ERASED IT FROM MY MIND. imagine my surprise when i put two and two together that sweet ball of sunshine haven is the author of the fic tht FUCKED ME UP SO BAD. i reread it the other day n sobbed like a little baby. but haven genuinely you are so talented and your fics feel so Easy, like they just are so in character and feel so Right. i can’t wait until you are a published author one day so that i can build a house out of copies of your book. you deserve the WORLD and i will not stop until it is urs.

@smoosnoom - mooooooOOOON my petri dish pal my eggo waffle supreme thing tht el eats i am biting u so hard. i kno that u know this already but you are literally so talented. lightning struck my house and also me when you hit post on i’m tearing you asunder and neither of us have been the same since. you just have such a distinct prose tht is so poetic and crafted so beautifully and uniquely and i am absolutely in awe every time i read it. u are also just so interesting to talk to like the way your brain works is so fun and cool and i lov being silly with you! i am tying you to a rocket w bert n ernie plushes n sending you to the Actual moon bc u belong up there w the stars (bert n ernie are for company so u don’t get sad and they have walkies in them so we can communicate from space which i think is cool). brb buying sidewalk chalk n transcribing all of ur fics in my driveway

@byeler - irene i know we have interacted a handful of times so you can block me after this if you want <3 but i just wanted to say that your fics were The first i Ever read for byler and i was just. completely shook. i have been reading fanfiction for over a decade and have read fic for ~30 fandoms so i have Been around the block before and there’s this feeling when you find an author that is just. Checking Every Box and you are It, irene. i remember i had to pace myself w the fics you had bc i didn’t want to run out bc it would devastate me. i already said this to you but i can’t wait to read heavy hopes when i am not dying/afraid of plagiarizing before i finish cmbcyb. also every time we have interacted has been an absolute delight, even when it has been bitching abt twitter lol. i think you are so great and i am Going to absorb your ao3 account into my skin. no there is nothing you can do about it. deal!

@miwism - MAL MALMAMALAMAMAAMLAMAMALAMLAMAL. i am going to ask you a question n i want it answered fr i expect a 20 page paper on my desk by monday: who gave you the RIGHT. you are a triple threat in my mind w fic and art n edits and being the funniest fucking person on this godforsaken site. you make me laugh SO MUCH while also making me completely in awe tht a person who is so cool and fun decides to kick it w us Losers. if i were to write you an actual report card i would give you straight As across the board: A+ fic, A+ art, A+ edits, A+ humor, A+ theories, A+ shitposts. comments: a pleasure to have in class. i would literally die for you. i’m serious. i will buy the headstone rn don’t think i won’t. i’ll fax u the receipt. ok great.

@mlchaelwheeler - SARAH. listen i kNOW we don’t talk that much but also i think we have interacted enough on the dash for me to be weird n say that you are That Mutual to Me. like i remember when you followed me i was internally scrambling like ok boys we gotta clean this place up gotta make things nice and pretty for sarah mlchaelwheeler. your analysis is SO GOOD and i aspire to have a brain as big as yours. you are such a delight and positive presence on my dash and when you’re online i’m like ok cool sarah is here everything is going to be excellent. i also want u to know that i think of you every time i watch rink o mania sad wilted will trailing behind mike bc of your icon. Your Impact, Sarah Mlchaelwheeler (ALSO UR URL WTF. ICONIC)

segwaying to people who i think are So Cool and i am Very Normal about:

@finalgirlbyers - sierra u are so funny to me it’s insane, and also, Always Correct. sometimes u post things n i’m like damn i didn’t think tht three minutes ago but sierra finalgirlbyers said it so it must be tru. i am drinking whatever koolaid u are serving, i am part of the hive mind, i would join a cult if u asked, etc, etc. every day i say thank god sierra is fighting the good fight n not a diseased m*lvn!

@elekinetic - ella u are so cool to me fr fr. i need to sit down and just devour your script tag and blow up your notifications bc every single one i’ve read hITS SO HARD. u literally never miss and i want you in the writer’s room sooooo fucking bad SOOOO BAD. more than anyone else. i also just rly appreciate the perspective tht u bring with your education and knowledge of tv and film. it’s so cool and always really appreciated!!

@heroesbyler - stav i think you are so cool and also correct literally all of the time. another one where i’m like oh stav said it guess it simply must be true! just every single post hits and i think tht you are so fun to have on my dash. tht is all. also i am biting you.

@miwiluvr - MOUMO U ARE SO COOL N TALENTED N EVERY TIME U REBLOG ONE OF MY FICS I LITERALLY DIE. if i never am able to post again it’s miwiluvr’s fault everyone…but fr ur art is so soft and just gorgeous and natural looking and i want to eat it with my mouth. thank u.

@nnilkyway - speaking of art i want to eat w my mouth - yvie omfg. you are literally so talented n when i followed you n you immediately followed back i had 2 sit down on the floor of the stranger things experience in los angeles california n that just felt so fitting somehow. ty for providing me w the mitski bangers i needed. also we are best friends in my head sry but it’s true so ur just going to have to deal with that.

@modsisawesome - more art i want to eat w my MOUTH. WTF. expect me to blow up ur notifs in a few days or weeks or whenever i have time i can’t make promises BUT EXPECT IT WHEN U DON’T EXPECT IT BECAUSE. UR ART IS SO SOFT AND REAL AND FUN AND I AM OBSESSED W IT AND U. i kno i declared us best friends n then fell off the face of the earth but tht is still true. bother me any day of the week i will respond probably tht same day of the week bc i think u are so cool.

@light-lanterne - angel you are so cool and i am so in awe of u every day. first of all your graphics are absolutely beautiful and please direct anyone who says otherwise directly to my askbox bc i will tear them a new one. second of all i think you are The biggest supporter of the byler fic writers and i am just so thankful for that and so appreciative of what you do. i am going to fight for my life to carve out time in the new year to read your fics they are at the Top of my list bc i want to show you just as much love and support as you have shown us!! thank you!!!

@new-ronantics - eevie i have such a crush on your art it is insane. everything you put out just has so much life and fluidity and looks so natural and i know how hard it is to achieve tht so i am just in awe of your talent. also your url is top tier and you are so so funny and every time you are online i am saying THANK GOD EEVIE IS HERE!!!!

@messrsbyler - nic i want to get to kno you better bc i have seen tht u are evil and dark minded and i am also evil and dark minded so i think we would get along so well. let me know when u want to be evil and dark minded bc i am always free to be evil and dark minded. thanks .

ok i have the memory of a goldfish and i am also so tired and also should really honestly truly be writing fic BUT i am so sorry if i forgot abt anyone!! if i did it’s probably just bc i am Afraid of u or we are so new mutuals. pls everyone bother me in the new year and then i will spend all year writing novels abt u for december 31 2023. ok goodbye <3

[slimegirlsoda]

Behold!!!! A list of all my known forms!

Slimegirl!:

I just wanna be gooey and melty and drench people when I hug them! Blowing bubbles in myself Also having some loose form shifting abilities. I would be bubbly like soda and taste like lime! But have a light red/pinkish color, or amybe a creamsicle orange? Blue is also good,, maybe a gradient?

Goblin:

yessss yesyeysyes, small ankle biting motherfucker! And big ass ears oooh that flutter when I get excited. Even better if we're talking about goblins with more animalistic traits, like little claws and long tails, sharp teeth are a MUST. I just wanna be small, but also fearsome!! And a Creature

(Yordles get an honorable mention here for being the one good thing about LoL)

Imp/demon:

like, succubus stuff right? But also I would be chill as hell like at least a little evil too but chilllll. Also I want horns, and a thin lil tail, and the knowledge that like, people are gonna expect me to be evil cause demon but like that's Completely up to me. A lotta scorpion like chitan would be cool too? And I wouldn't mind hooves if we're going the full mile

Demons get a lot of point for being tall and imposing but,,, imp obviously wins because of the previous post. Like the best of both worlds!!! Do me you wanna be small AND a lil morally dubious? Like yes please I'll be the most mischievous fuck on the planet! Sitting atop the fourth wall like damn look at these goons, I would also love the ability to Bamf, blame DeadEndParanormalPark for making Courtney the most me character known to man

Robots!!!!:

I, just, need to be, artificial, AND, customizable. Being a MegaMan fan has changed me Forever. Sometimes! You are a girl! With enough firepower in your arm to level a building! And you also switch out your boob size! I'm not gonna lie I'm greedy as fuck cause I would install every device known to man in myself like a real TeenageRobot situation, but thats part of it! Not to mention the romantic implications of letting someone fix me up like duejsjsjaokakwks okay. But really I would like to turn my hand into a cannon, or a sword, or maybe I just wanna de-atach it for funsies. Also customizing it no less humanoid forms would be such a fun experiment, Robot also has a lotta cool stuff to do with my neurodivergent shit like sorry guys I know I'm not processing optimally but I'm just Built like that, also, having a TV for a head would set me for LIFE

Catgirl:

y'know like, nya? But fr this one just feels natural. Purring, hissing, all shit I already do, before I even connected the dots with this one. My ears lying flat when I'm annoyed, my furr prickling in uncomfy situations, God it feels Just like that. All and all I'm already a cat person, and just having such an element of grace when I'm already a Lazy Sunbeam bitch would fit so well. Claws! Sharp teeth! Always a plus, in all forms Also!!! I want pets!!! And to nuzzle! Your hand! Yes! You! Specifically!

Doggirl:

gah see there are two girls in me, one is cat and one is dog. I think I'm much more cat than dog but damn! Damn am I a good girl!!!! There's some wolf in there too but I wont lie I'm domesticated as hell, I just want pets and my tail wags so! Often! Pretty much any time I'm excited, it's the only way to describe that it's like The Stim Ever! Also barking, so fucking good, sometimes I just wanna bark nonstop the noise just feels good to make

Dragon:

best creature ever, so much envy. Scales so pretty like armor, tail so long and thick like big lizard, amazing wings! Sharp claws, talons, breath of fire!? Hhhh yes please, I almost don't feel cool enough to be a dragon but we can't all be cool, read Wings of Fire btw it's a great book,

Witch:

not exactly a gender more like a Class? But i put it here cause I just wanna be the most Homey magic user. I would like to brew my magic, it just feels so tangible, black cat's and brooms the whole shebang, though I'd probably modernize myself, but it just seems like such a Life y'know? Maybe I should learn actual witchcraft

Magical girl:

now this may SEEM like it contradicts the last one, and maybe it DOES but hear me out! I WANT! to transform! Like I could be my normal self, prolly boymodding just a hoodie and no dopamine. But then trouble? I whip out my sword with a fuckin star on the hilt that can also turn into a bow, wave that shit around and now I'm the flashiest motherfucker this side of the cosmos! Would need some big ass boots! Skirt but also armor! Bracers with the fingerless gloves, ohhh the ultimate drip. It also doesn't help that I wanna be op as fuck, like I'm the bitch that chooses adaptability or power copying as a power, like I want it all, all the elements, the versatility, the range, gladly would be a jack of all trades master of none, speed, strength, or range fighter? all of the above please, I am not min-maxing a balanced build all the way.

Angel:

this one's kinda lower on this list but it's still there. Kinda like how I wanna be a demon who's still human and good in very ways, I wanna be an angel that's just a Lil fucked up. Like, corrupt me Please, this cute lil halo and perfect robes are a ficade I just wanna have fun!! Also wings are always cool, big wings to exstends when Flutters, but also small lil P wings are maybe my go to, idk why but I like em

also we all want the half angel half demon thing cause it's cool as fuck but I'm not strong enough to admit it yet

General monster/shadow gender stuff:

this is like the weird gender goo left at the bottom but there's something here,, like its mostly cause I wanna be Creature unknowable Thing, some kinda chimera? Claws, tail, and a lotta sharp Danger zones. Shadow is in her two because I'm definitely a night time kinda creature, perching on shit and looking down. All kinds of shape shifting is here too but that's not its own category cause that's kinda the theme of the whole list

Another honorable mention goes to a Lot of Pokemon I don't feel like listing. They are all either adorable or little monsters. half of my favorite Pokemons belong here cause I have to separate my list by do I like them in the I think they're neat way or in the I wanna be them way?

I may add more to this later if I remember any more

Also this is me holding back i could talk about any of these at much greater length. Please DM me I am Normal and care about this topic a Normal Amount, and want to talk about it to other people and hear their forms an Even Normaler Amount

[glofigs]

I posted 363 times in 2022

76 posts created (21%)

287 posts reblogged (79%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@jocia92

@haslemere

@versaphile

@moonshoos

@mossomness

I tagged 88 of my posts in 2022

#dan stevens - 71 posts

#gaslit starz - 15 posts

#gaslit - 9 posts

#welcome to chippendales - 9 posts

#john dean - 8 posts

#betty gilpin - 5 posts

#starz gaslit - 4 posts

#birthday love - 4 posts

#mo dean - 4 posts

#instagram - 4 posts

Longest Tag: 115 characters

#i believe that wingard wanted to cast dan in the first movie but dan couldn't do it because of scheduling conflicts

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

See the full post

26 notes - Posted April 19, 2022

#4

https://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/2022/04/dan-stevens-wanted-to-look-like-a-work-of-art-at-the-gaslit-premiere

Dan Stevens Wanted to Look Like a Work of Art at the Gaslit Premiere

The actor stunned on the red carpet in a groovy, sherbet-inspired ensemble that perfectly matched his multicolored fingernails.

When you think about the cross section where fashion and Watergate meet, your brain probably defaults to boring gray suits—except, perhaps, if you're Dan Stevens. Stevens was dressed to the nines in a groovy, sherbet-tinged suit for Monday night's premiere of Gaslit, Starz's miniseries about the ’70s scandal. The show stars Sean Penn as John N. Mitchell, Nixon's attorney general, and Julia Roberts as Martha Mitchell, his fiercely outspoken wife, as well as Stevens as whistleblower John Dean, and Betty Gilpin as his savvy wife, Mo Kane Dean. Held at the Metropolitan Museum of Art, the Gaslit premiere saw Stevens stun in a Creamsicle-inspired suit, which boldly swirled orange, pink, yellow, and red swaths. The pattern was reminiscent of both a lava lamp and Fruit Stripe gum, and complemented the red carpet’s color scheme. “I wanted to blend in,” Stevens told V.F. “I wanted to come disguised as a work of art.” Stevens coordinated his colors down to his fingernails, each of which was painted a hue found in his suit.

Along with being a meticulous dresser, Stevens is also an easygoing scene partner, according to co-star Gilpin. “I think that you never really know when you show up on day one what the actor opposite you is going to be like,” she told V.F. on the carpet. “You never know if he's gonna be ultra Method and terrifying, or doesn't want to look you in the eye, or, you know, is a horror show. Dan is just a saint and so the opposite of that, which often makes me be like, 'Oh, then he's probably not a very good actor if he's normal.' And then he was such a great actor."

27 notes - Posted April 20, 2022

#3

The rumors are true, (for once). Ahhhh the blonde hair explained!!!!

31 notes - Posted September 30, 2022

#2

See the full post

35 notes - Posted June 1, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

found on google, it looks like extras from that brill photoshoot. The Wrap

67 notes - Posted March 2, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[pbandjesse]

We jsut got our first 'no' rsvp. Well not really. But we got our first late night text that they aren't coming. And I am like. Really angry about it. On James's behalf I didn't think I would be this mad but I am. I am trying to calm down so I can write this with a clear head and go to sleep at s good time. But man. I didn't expect to be so mad.

I had a pretty good day though. I woke up after kind of a shitty night's sleep. Tossing a lot. Jessica was texting me asking if I wanted to stay late to cover the desk. Sure. All I wanted to do today was work on beading and I can do that at the desk. And getting paid is always nice.

I got dressed and had to double back after I left because I forgot to grab the totebag I filled with all my water bottles to fill since we are still in the boil water advisory. I would fill them at work with the filtered water they have.

It was a nice drive in. I got breakfast and a sandwich for later. And I got to the museum exactly on time.

We had a meeting all morning and that was good. I sat in the back so my beading wouldn't bother anyone. They brought us donuts. And it was nice to see all my old guy friends.

I was very engaged in the conversation. Because I had something to do with my hands. I was able to finish one whole word throughout the meeting. And I enjoyed the discussion and updates and reminders. Some of it was like reminding us how to do intros and what being a lead for a program means. And since I already do that I felt very much validated.

I would be texting Jess and my parents. Dad seems like he is doing okay. It was good to just chat with him. Makes me feel safer because I know he's alright.

After the meeting I went to eat my sandwich and fill my bottles. Jessica was going to have me work on the new tags for the cannery. First though I went and washed my hands and chatted with James for a few minutes before following Jessica upstairs to her office.

It took a lot longer then I think anyone thought to print and cut and match the fronts and backs of the tags. But I like a task and I just chatted with Jessica about how being able to anticipate needs is a really good skill to have. And how not everyone can do that. Which can be a problem at the museum.

Poor James was stuck at the desk with no relief for lunch because the tags took so long. And when I finally got down there they had to run to a meeting.

So I had an hour to work at the desk. I did my beading. I had some chats with some lovely guests. One visiting from a house musuem in Ohio, and a student from the Dominican Republic. We got to chat about how Ellen just moved there and it's beautiful. He said I should go visit. I don't disagree.

At 3 I kicked everyone out and locked the door. Well I failed to lock the door. Angie helped me when I got the key stuck in the door.

James finished their meeting and we said goodbye. I would head out into the world and go to the thrift store to wander around.

And I had a lot of fun. Just looking at stuff. I got a pretty little glass paperweight and this cookie jar that made me laugh. I also got an orange pinafore dress that is true vintage and is really cute. I'm going to look like a creamsicle.

It was misty raining when I left. And there was apparently an accident so it took me an extra 10 minutes to get home. But I got back here in one piece.

I felt a little annoyed because Mr Will was finally here 'fixing' the counters. But he just poorly caulked the one back to the wall. Didn't look at the others at all. And the caulk just dropped all down the wall and is horrible and once he left and I realized how and it was I made James contact Tina with pictures. I love Mr Will but this is above his skillet. The counters need to be installed correctly. Cause this sucks.

Brandon would come over soon. I would just be beading. Basically all night. James made us crepes. We talked about the wedding. Sweetp was a little goober and being very playful. It was a nice night.

Me and James came and laid down after Brandon left. And that is when we got a text from Jamess cousin that her and her husband aren't coming to the wedding. This is the same cousin who we traveled to go to their wedding. A cousin James really loves. And I'm just so pissed. Like first of all way to be wicked late letting us know. Second this wedding has had this date for over a year. You just chose not to prioritize this. And third I am very worried, as it James, that this is going to mean more of the Massachusetts family isn't going to come.

I am trying to not be very mad. I, again, was finally feeling a little more excited. Dad's doctor says he can travel for the wedding safely. Things have been coming together. But the whole wedding was sort of pushed on us in many ways, so now people we really had made the wedding more. Jamess larger family. Aren't coming. And it just makes me so stupid angry.

I texted Charlotte to let her know because James is going to reach out and I really hope she gives James some comfort. And maybe raises a little hell. I can only raise so much, but I really feel like the family should make them feel bad. I know that's like. Very petty but that's where I am right now.

I got a shower late because I was mad and couldn't move. But I am clean now and trying to wind down. I painted my toes and James packed their bag for this weekend. Tomorrow we are at the musuem. And then it is our Bach weekend trip! I'm looking forward to it.

Sleep good everyone. Take care of yourselves. Be kinder to yourself.

[annieintheaair]

I'm learning to fly, but I ain't got wings, coming down is the hardest thing.

I feel like I am ready to move somewhere totally new, find a new job in a different industry, and just completely start over.

The last few weeks at work have been rough, to say the least. I got my first ever missed trip a few weeks ago, which I'm still trying to fight because they tried to reassign me to work a 3-day Philly trip when I was supposed to be doing an Oklahoma City ODAN. They didn't even leave me any voicemails or come find me in the airport so I went home.

Tonight, more storms rolled in just as I was getting ready for work. I was scheduled to work a Tulsa ODAN and with the weather, I figured I'd leave early for work to give myself some extra time. Just as I pulled out onto the main street by my house, it started pouring. My phone was notifying me of flash floods and sure enough, I got onto the highway, and I could literally hear the water hitting under my car because the roads were so flooded. I got into the right lane, made my way to the next exit, and called scheduling as I got off the highway.

The scheduler was relatively nice to me and suggested that my flight would probably be canceled since my flight in the morning had been canceled and now my sequence failed continuity. He told me to call back in about thirty minutes or so to see what happened.

On my way home, I decided I wanted to stop at Wendy's. I got some spicy nuggets, a baked potato, and their new dreamsicle frosty. When I saw it, I just knew I had to get it. My Grandma loved frosty's and also loved orange creamsicles so the two together were a perfect combo.

At home, I changed out of my uniform and settled in to eat my food. I waited a bit and then called scheduling. The new guy I spoke to wasn't nice and told me I'd get a missed trip. I asked if I could call out sick then and he said no. I asked if I could get a PO, which was also a no. He told me to call a flight service manager and ask. Long story short, no one would give me a PO and now I have another missed trip to fight with them about.

I have learned that this job is not worth my life. If the roads are flooded and I physically cannot get to work, it's not even worth trying. Ever since I lost my car in the flood last year, I've had severe PTSD when it comes to storms and flash floods. My anxiety gets really bad and driving in it makes me have a panic attack. I can't even drive when I'm having a panic attack. Yeah, I'm annoyed about the missed trip but I'm also not trying to die for this job.

Anyway, here's the follow-up on this weekend:

Friday ended up being a pretty busy day. I thought about going to yoga but saw the traffic and decided against it. I felt like I had plenty to do at home anyway to prepare for the rest of the day, like get gas and stop at Dutch Bro's for a rebel to give me some energy.

I left my house around 3:45pm, sat in traffic, and picked up my mom at my sister's house around 4:30pm. We took a detour to Marty B's for BBQ and drinks. I had a margarita and brisket mac and cheese and my mom had wine and brisket tacos. Marty B's is always worth the detour.

We met my friends at the Little Wooden Penguin around 7pm, where we hung out and planned on doing putt-putt but never actually did. It was a little bit of a disappointment but we still had a good time.

The ride home was long. So many roads were closed. After multiple detours, I got to the point where I was actually angry and on the verge of tears. It took me an hour and a half to get home. My mom and I had talked about stopping somewhere to do something fun on the way home but ended up not because I just wanted to get home at that point.

We finished out the night by drinking wine at my house and watching Father of the Bride 2.

Saturday morning I slept until about 10am. My mom was doing yard work outside and then we went to get coffee and run some errands. We ended up going to Fort Worth to check out the new Daiso location and found another unique store, too.

Back at home, we changed and got ready for dinner. We went to Walloon's, which had been on my list forever. My mom got wine and seafood mac and cheese and I got an espresso martini and mussels. The Google reviews said to try the chocolate dessert, which was mousse, so I enjoyed that, too.

It was still early when we were done with dinner so we ended up going down the street to The Magnolia, which is a wine bar that my mom and I really like. We both had a glass of wine and then ventured back to my car to head home. Neither of us wanted to go home so once we got back closer to my house, I suggested we go to American Revelry. My mom had a Mexican coffee and I had a gin cocktail.

This morning, we got up and headed to church in Fort Worth. I had made a brunch reservation at another one on my list, Quince. It was a nice morning so sitting by the river was a great spot for brunch. We both had mimosas, my mom had avocado toast, and I got chilaquiles. Everything was delicious.

We ended up running over to Trader Joe's for a few things and then my mom got a Lyft to my sister's house and I headed home where I turned on the TV but ended up taking a nap.

Before I knew it, it was time to get ready for work.

All of the delays and cancelations and everything else going on, especially a lack of a contract and a livable wage, have me wondering if staying is the right choice. I have nothing keeping me here in Texas other than this job. Maybe it's time to find a new job and move to a new place. When I opened Facebook tonight, while waiting to hear back from my job, I saw a post that talked about not being afraid to try something new or move somewhere new. I felt like maybe it was speaking to me. There's literally nothing holding me back right now.

I applied to some jobs on LinkedIn tonight, with the idea that either I find something and go where the job is or if it's remote, maybe choose to try somewhere new. South Carolina has always been on my list.

For now, I'll continue checking Fort Worth restaurants off my list while I'm still here, even if sometimes I have to go alone.

xoxo

Annie

[imglowinginthedarkness]

ooh i love coming up with questions! feel free to ignore any of these you dont want to do tho

1- werewolves or vampires? and why

2- what fictional character has impacted your life the most?

3- similar to that, was there one movie you were obsessed with and watched over and over as a kid?

4- hat's your "type" and does it vary between theory and reality?

5- re you a good cook or baker? if so, what's the best thing you've ever made?

6- f you could teleport anywhere in the world but you had to stay there for a year, where would you go?

7- where do you see yourself in 5 years? Not in a job interview way

8- what height would you want to be if you could choose?

9- is there anything you really want to do this year that you've never done before?

10- what's something your followers might be surprised to learn about you?

these are so thorough and fun oh my GOSH !!!!

1– werewolves 100%. vampires are sexy in their own right but as a monster fucker i cant resist a big ole fuckin creature, and werewolves are the perfect combination of human intelligence and monstrous otherworldliness. they can be basically just a human with more hair and a tail or they can lose all semblance of humanity and be giant hulking beasts. they're perfect. 10/10

2– sans the skeleton, absolutely. i know he's been sorta transfigured into a meme and hes a silly little guy to me, too, but like also, really and truthfully, he (and undertale itself) came into my life during a time i deeply and desperately needed something to help me feel safe, and sans was that thing for me.

3– there were two, actually!! rise of the guardians and a monster in paris !! i still to this day absolutely adore a monster in paris, it's such a charming film and the soundtrack is phenomenal

4– my "type"..... man thats a hard question. i dont really have a 'type', per say? or at least i dont think so, but there are some qualities that i basically always find consistently attractive! here's a list of em

being tall and/or physically imposing

shoulder length dark hair

low/deep, soft, smooth voice

humor/being able to make me laugh

passion/being hard working/loving the things they do

being a good dancer

good natured cockiness 

5– i dont know how good of cook/baker i am but i do love to cook/bake ! i think my favorite thing ive ever made would have to be these orange creamsicle cupcakes i made w a friend years ago for a baking competition. we won ! (＊๑˘◡˘)

6– oooh probably either.... wales or japan! ive always wanted to visit

7– honestly i have no idea... but hopefully somewhere, u know? maybe in a little apartment with a cat . that would be nice

8– maybe like, 5'6" to 5'8"? that way i could still be a short king™ but tall enough so that people dont immediately assume im still in high school

9– i wanna travel by myself! and im actually gonna do that in july, because im flying to england to visit a friend :]

10– uhhhhhh hmmmm i dunno! i'm adopted? people are sometimes surprised to learn that

[friendzoned61]

Wanted to do another ego redesign, so this time I went with Bing and Google!

Thanks again to @ambrosiadreamer for the ideas!

[whatifyoulivelikethat]

bullseye | got it bad, m | jjk, kth

pairing(s): jungkook x reader

summary: Kim Taehyung really regrets setting up his best friend with Jeon Jungkook, mostly because instead of dealing with one insufferable asshole, he now has to deal with two. He just wants you to come to his art exhibit and support him, and you show up looking like a pimp with Jungkook looking like your escort, sigh.

warnings: rated M (18+) for language; you’re a cocky asshole and so is Jungkook; schemes, please save Taehyung; graphic descriptions of various sex acts, smut (fem reader, making out / dry humping / fingering in a public bathroom, threesome smut, mild restraint, nipple play, m-receiving oral, ass / pussy spanking, double penetration / spit-roast, facial, mild dom/sub themes, so much kissing); non-idol!BTS; fuckboy!Jungkook x bisexual, fuckgirl!reader; ft artist, best friend!Taehyung

yup, it’s Butter purple-haired ponytail JK and orange suit Taehyung

--

"You have got to be kidding me!"

"Oh, hey, Tae. How's it going?"

"Hey, hyung."

The voices, one irritated, one pleased, one mischievous, all three looking like the epitome of trouble and the eventual subjects of someone's wet dream.

Kim Taehyung marched over to you, purely indignant, his previous honey-brown hair now dyed to the color of black coffee, the long curls pushed back to reveal his forehead. One stray lock brushed against his dark, sculpted brows that were currently furrowed in annoyance. He stopped in front of you and your boyfriend, hands on his hips. He looked handsome as hell in a tailored orange creamsicle suit and gold earrings, white dress shirt neatly pressed.

"Why are you dressed like a pimp?" Taehyung hissed, jabbing your left breast through your dress. "Why are you dressed like his pimp?!" he added, pointing at Jungkook's smirking face.

You blinked innocently at Taehyung, lifting your oversized black fur coat sleeve to place a delicate hand on your chest, completely unbothered by his harsh reaction to your appearance. Your nails were a gradient from black to white, ever-so-slightly pointed, but not too long to be inconvenient.

Just enough to show you meant business.

Oh, and also you were wearing mock-neck, halter-style minidress that faded from black to white, molded to your every curve. It perfectly matched Jungkook's gradient black-to-white suit. Every step was accented with a sharp click, you in sleek black high-heels and him in glossy black oxfords, dangerous from head-to-toe.

Yes, Jungkook and you were that couple.

"Is that a t-shirt?" Taehyung snapped, switching to prodding Jungkook’s pecs, who grinned in response. You shrugged, the shoulders of your fur coat sliding down so that it now rested on your elbows, exposing your shoulders.

"He thought about not coming with one, but I advised him the other visitors would be too distracted by his sexiness to view your art," you explained, bowing as if you had done a great service.

"And I told her they would be to distracted with her amazing legs, but it's better not to cover them because I like looking," Jungkook chuckled, placing an arm around your waist and pulling you to him possessively.

Taehyung facepalmed.

"I regret paying matchmaker to the two biggest egos I know," he mumbled through his fingers, glaring at the two of you.

"Hey, we kept it low profile. Neutrals."

Taehyung pointed to your boyfriend's hair, pulled back into a sleek ponytail. "Hello? His hair is fucking purple."

You waved his comment away dismissively. "Well, besides that."

"You're a class-A asshole."

"Still makes me high class," you replied with a wink.

"This is really nice, hyung," Jungkook cut in between your bickering. "There’s quite a lot of people here already. I didn't know you were so talented and popular. As expected from my girl's best friend, eh?"

Taehyung winced, rubbing the back of his neck, ears turning red. "Eh... it's not a big deal..." he muttered, but you could tell he was enjoying the praise.

"Of course, it is, Tae," you chuckled, pulling out of Jungkook's grasp to hug him, squeezing him between your fur-covered arms. "You've worked so hard to be able to display your paintings at such a nice venue. I'm proud of you."

Taehyung laughed shyly, hugging you back. "Ahaha... thanks, as usual." He planted a light kiss on the top of your head. "I'm happy you guys came."

You grinned. "Indeed. You needed visitors to match the space," you drawled, sweeping your arms in a grandiose gesture to the glass cases of Taehyung's paintings, crisp white walls, and black marble flooring.

Taehyung rolled his eyes, smiling despite being over your antics. "Not sure I need a high-end escort and his pimp sauntering around..."

"When are your parents arriving? I want to introduce them to Jungkook," you interrupted, tugging on Jungkook's arm and making his cheeks flush pink.

"Like this?! Are you serious, my parents are going to have a heart attack once they realize there's a male version of you!"

"Aw, come on, your dad loves seeing me!"

"That's because you both are always up to no good... fucking always pulling pranks on me... I'm actually glad they're stuck in traffic now..."

-

You slid your thumb into his mouth, smirking as you heard his muffled whine. He was trying to stay quiet, staring down at you with half-lidded eyes, whimpering as you rubbed his tongue with the pad of your finger. One of your legs was hooked around his waist and he was holding it up with one hand. His other between your legs, fingers hooking underneath your panties.

“Fuck, I love looking at you, Jungkook,” you whispered, leaning forward, shuddering at the feeling of his saliva pooling around your thumb, your own tongue snaking out and tracing the air right between his open lips.

Jungkook moaned softly and shoved two fingers inside your tight, wet pussy.

You pulled your thumb out and crashed your lips to his, letting your satisfied exhale into his throat, your name trapped between his lungs and your hungry mouth, kissing him deeply as he plunged his fingers in and out, pressing your body into the wall of the bathroom stall. Shivers up and down your spine, back arching to feel even more of his chest against yours, frustrated at the clothing between you and him, but still hot and exciting, your hands circling his head and playing with his ponytail, rolling your hips into his rough thrusts.

You tried to break free and moan, but Jungkook captured you with his lips, forcing your noises into his mouth to silence them, rubbing his erection against your hip and thigh, the sound between your legs getting louder because you were getting wetter, closer, your eyes cracking open and seeing his half-open too, staring at you with lust and love, determined to push you over the edge, even in the men’s bathroom where Kim Taehyung’s art exhibit was being held.

Hey, you both waited until you had a nice, long conversation with Taehyung’s parents where his mom drilled Jungkook with questions about what he did and what kind of person he was. His dad, in contrast, seemed to approve of Jungkook and gave him a hearty slap on the arm, telling him trouble and trouble often went well together. Then you and Taehyung’s dad had a praise fest about his son, which made Taehyung turn beet-red in embarrassment. Both of you meant it all, of course.

But, also, both of you enjoyed embarrassing Taehyung in public. It was fun.

Yeah, dads loved you.

You couldn’t imagine why that was.

All that aside, after Taehyung's parents bid their son goodbye, Jungkook dragged you into the men's bathroom and began to make out with your face.

He contained himself for a few hours. It was a valiant effort, living off only groping your ass a couple times, but a man can only take so much when you’re looking like a five-course meal and he’s aware that you’re willing to let him eat, you know?

No? Oh, well.

Maybe that’s just your problem.

Also, yes, maybe you discreetly teased him a couple times by rubbing your ass on his crotch and pressing your tits against his back. Maybe.

You lowered one of your hands, cupping your fingers around his length, sighing in his mouth, feeling how perfectly rock-hard he was, knowing you couldn’t have it and he couldn’t give it to you, not yet, but soon, his deep snarl at your touch, fuck, kisses intensifying, shoving his fingers into you all the way to the knuckle, the wet squish audible and obscene, the adrenaline of danger and satisfaction creeping you closer and closer to your high. His thumb came up and grazed your clit, making you close your eyes and rock your hips into his touch, moaning his name into his own mouth, his force of his fingers pushing his thumb against your throbbing clit hard and fast, the scent of black coffee and lush dragon fruit on his skin and yours, mixing with the sweetness of your orgasm as you wailed in glorious triumph, clutching his head with your hand and his waist with your leg, your other one shaking with strain as each pulse shook you, squeezing his clothed length in your hand, wanting it and pulling back to tell him just that in hot whispers, his soft moan against your mouth, whispering back, your name and his desire, his dark brown eyes nearly black with lust.

“Shit, you know how bad I want to fuck you, right now,” Jungkook panted.

“Please don’t.”

Huh?

You raised an eyebrow at the annoyed baritone voice. “Taehyung?”

“Do you know how long I’ve been standing here, knocking on this bathroom stall, you absolute horndogs?”

You heard him gritting his teeth, his voice nearly a deep growl. You did what any natural person would do.

Reached over and unlocked the door, letting it swing open to reveal your and Jungkook’s grinning faces.

His fingers remained very firmly inside your pussy, barely covered by the hem of your dress. You swept your arm back so your fur coat was out of the way. Always considerate. Taehyung stood at the opening of the door, hands on his hips, orange blazer flaring out with his posture, immediately throwing up his hands and jerking his head away once he realized that, yes, of course, you two would not bother covering up anything.

“Fucking – shit, get your hands off her, man, go home to do that–”

Jungkook began to slide his fingers out, scissoring them with a wet squish and you mewled, slightly exaggerated and performative.

“Oh my God, never mind, stop, leave them in there,” Taehyung snarled, realizing he was facing the mirror and therefore could still see both yours and Jungkook’s smug smirks. He abruptly turned ninety degrees, now facing the wall, giving you both the side eye. “The fuck is wrong with you people? Do you have any decency?”

“Sure, we do,” you chirped.

“Yeah, that’s why we’re in the bathroom,” Jungkook added, softly rubbing your clit and making you bite your lip, enjoying it very, very much.

A muscle in Taehyung’s eyebrow twitched. “Public bathroom,” he snapped, rubbing his forehead. “Fuck, what if it wasn’t me who walked in here? What if It was some goddamn stranger listening to this shit?”

“Speaking of which,” Jungkook mused, cocking a brow. “Normal people would just leave. Why did you stay and listen?”

You didn’t say anything. You were simply happily grinding on his hand, the gentle pressure creating a constant ecstasy that you were completely satisfied with, one hand hooked around Jungkook’s neck, waiting for Taehyung to answer with a huge, amused grin on your face. Taehyung knew everything about you.

It almost meant you knew everything about Taehyung.

He rolled his eyes. “You act like I’ve never heard her orgasm before. Big fucking deal.”

Jungkook gave him a pair of incredibly wide eyeballs that indicated that, yes, that was kind of a big deal.

“Tae was my first kiss.”

“What?’ Jungkook blurted, snapping his head back to you.

You shrugged. “We were, like, eight. Just wanted to know what kissing was.”

Jungkook blinked very rapidly, stunned.

His two fingers were still inside you.

You scrunched up your face, thinking. “We were also each other’s first head and fuck too. Although it wasn’t very good.”

“You were a bit shit,” Taehyung interjected.

“It took you five whole minutes to aim. Even a watermelon would be dry at that point.”

Jungkook was still trying to process that you were each other’s first kiss with his fingers knuckle deep in your pussy. “W… What? Why aren’t you guys dating?”

You snorted. “I can’t do that. He’s like my brother.”

Taehyung stuck his tongue out. “And she’s like my sister. That’s weird.”

Jungkook finally yanked his fingers out of you and threw out his hands in disbelief. “And being each other’s first times for – shit, basically everything – isn’t weird?”

Your eyes flickered to Jungkook’s soaked fingers, your cum stuck between them in viscous strings. Ooh, sexy. You licked your lips, breaking out in a pleased smirk. Taehyung spied what you were looking at and facepalmed. Jungkook seemed to notice too and turned to look at it, suddenly forgetting the whole discussion.

And put his cum-covered fingers into his mouth, moaning deliciously around them.

Taehyung made a horrified face in the mirror, making eye contact with you.

“Um, gross!”

“Eh, shut up, Tae, not like you haven’t done it in front of me before.”

“Well, I don’t wanna watch Jungkook do it,” he shot back, spinning around to glare at you. “He’s your boyfriend!”

You quirked an eyebrow. “You’ve seen other guys do it before when we’ve had threesomes. Plus, you’ve watched me open my mouth with other men’s cum in it so you could cum in my mouth too.”

Jungkook choked on his own fingers.

“WHAT?” he roared.

“You weren’t serious about them!” Taehyung flicked his hand, completely ignoring Jungkook. “And you’re my go-to when the girls I’m seeing want to experience a threesome, so I was just doing you a favor!”

Your boyfriend was having a mild heart attack and neither you nor Taehyung seemed to notice, too busy bickering about your strangely integrated sex lives.

“What’s the difference? It’s just Jungkook. You guys are friends.”

“Yeah, extra reason why I don’t want to sit around and imagine him slurping from your vagina. I gotta look into his eyes later!”

You raised your hands, shaking your head. “So what? You’ve seen my other sex partners in public and never said much about it. Why are you making such a fuss now?”

“Because!” Taehyung flung his hands, stamping a foot on the tile floor in frustration, his handsome features twisted into despair, hands on his head and messing up his dark brown hair. “Because you’re going to stop being my friend now that you’re serious about someone and I can’t do anything about it because that someone is Jungkook and I actually like the guy! I’m fucking happy for you and shit, but, fuck, fuck, what am I gonna do when you’re not in my corner anymore?”

Your jaw dropped, shocked.

“Tae, what are you talking about–?”

He spun around, about to run out, but you were faster, grabbing his arm and pulling him back, yanking him into a fierce hug. And, just like that, Taehyung was that awkward, weird kid in elementary school again, not wanting to admit he was scared and frightened of the big mean boys teasing him about his odd drawings and strange thought processes, calling him a dorky alien. He grabbed your shoulders, shivering, holding back tears.

“No one’s gonna protect me…” Taehyung sniffed, burying his face in your hair. “If you’re gone, I can’t be brave…”

“Hey, you know that’s not true,” you chastised lightly, squeezing him. “You’ve become strong, all on your own. You know that. That whole exhibit is filled with your art. You even got offers to buy some of your pieces. Isn’t that amazing?” You pulled back and placed your hands on Taehyung’s cheeks, smiling up at him kindly. He still looked gloomy and uneasy, lower lip sticking out. “Come on, you know I’m right, Van Gogh,” you teased, pinching his cheeks a little. He fidgeted, frown lessening. “I will always, always be in your corner. No matter what. No guy is going to make me stop being friends or supporting you. You need me to knock someone’s front teeth out, give me the time and place and I got your back.”

“That’s going to send you to jail,” he muttered, smiling slightly.

“Then I’ll go to jail. That’s just glorified detention because they give you free meals.”

He laughed, still with a tinge of anxiousness. “You promise you won’t stop being my best friend over some guy?”

You grinned. “You’ll always be my best friend, Tae. I just happen to really enjoy his company and his dick. You know, a girl has needs.”

He stuck his hand out childishly, pinky sticking out. “Pinky promise me.” Then he stuck his other hand out. “Actually, double pinky promise me.”

You crossed your wrists over each other and pressed your pinkies to his, squeezing his hands tightly.

“I promise I’ll always be your best friend.”

“Uh, guys, you’re kinda making me feel like a third wheel…”

Jungkook might as well have been a bathroom sink to Taehyung and you in this moment.

Taehyung nodded firmly to you. “Okay. You promised. You better keep it.”

You rolled your eyes. “When have I ever broken a promise to you?”

“Hmm, I guess you’re right…” All of a sudden, he looked down at your hands and wrenched his own out of them. “Oi! Where have those hands been, young lady?” He looked at his open hands with a repulsed scowl. “You better not have touched his dick and then my hands without washing yours! That’s disgusting!”

“Hey, I take offense to that,” Jungkook retorted heatedly. “My dick is perfectly clean and she didn’t get to touch me yet because you busted in and interrupted us–”

“What are you going on about, you’ve touched my hands after I’ve given handjobs! I didn’t hear you complaining!”

“He’s done what–?”

“I keep telling you that’s different, this is Jungkook, a man you actually love, and here I thought you were incapable of that.” Taehyung spoke over Jungkook, jabbing his finger into his palm to drive his point home. “You get that sparkly shit in your eyes when you talk about him and it makes me want to puke–”

“I do not get sparkly shit in my eyes, what the fuck does that even mean?”

“You literally will not shut up about how pretty he is!”

“He is pretty! Look at him!” You banished your arms in Jungkook’s direction like he was your first-place trophy on display, which he might as well be at this point with how much attention either of you were giving him. At least he looked the part.

Taehyung rolled his eyes exaggeratedly, throwing his whole head back. “I can give you pretty. You’ve been telling me I’m handsome all my life.”

“Why don’t we just have a threesome?”

Silence.

Both you and Taehyung jerked your heads to Jungkook, jaws dropped at his suggestion.

The door to the men’s bathroom opened and an old man bounced in, humming to himself.

He saw you.

He stopped, tilting his head. Then he looked from Jungkook to Taehyung and wiggled his eyebrows.

“Love triangle or sexy night, boys?”

Taehyung choked on air. “Not a love triangle.”

“Oooh, sexy night.” The old man gave you two thumbs up. “I’d love to join, but I’ll back out this time.”

You laughed heartily as Jungkook and Taehyung grabbed your arms, pulling you out of the men’s bathroom, not about to discuss a possible threesome in front of some old guy who vaguely offered to make it a foursome.

You made sure to give the old man a wink, sticking your head back in the open door to say, “Maybe next time, eh?”

The old man cackled and Taehyung slapped a hand over your mouth, dragging you out.

“Please shut up, I fucking swear…”

-

“So, why is it different?”

Somehow both you and Jungkook had dragged your best friend into your apartment and tied him to a chair. One of those nice wooden ones with plenty of openings to slip cotton rope through. Probably not what Kim Taehyung thought he was going to do right after his art exhibition, but judging by his peeved, unsurprised face, it wasn’t a completely unexpected result either.

You had pulled up another chair to sit in front of him, still wearing your fur coat, knees between his knees, mostly because Taehyung was forced to spread them because of how you tied the knots.

“I think I hate you,” Taehyung muttered.

“Nah.”

“At least a little bit.”

You slipped the shoulders of your coat down, exposing your skin, casually crossing your arms under your breasts and leaning forward, smiling sweetly at Taehyung. His dispassionate face basically said, ‘go-suck-your-own-dick’. He tried to pulled his arms free.

“Don’t rip your blazer.”

“Bite me.”

“You gonna answer my question?” you asked, redirecting the conversation.

Taehyung clicked his tongue. “I told you. It’s because I can tell you love him.”

You broke your playful demeanor for a second, smiling broadly. “Really?”

He chuckled. “Yeah, you dork.”

“I don’t know if I’ve ever felt like more of a third wheel in my entire life even though you’re talking about how much you love me,” Jungkook said behind you. He was sitting on the couch, as the chairs had been repositioned in the living room.

Taehyung pursed his lips. “That’s why I got scared, you know…” He leaned forward a bit, pouting. “What if you spend so much time with him that you forget about me? What if you guys break up and you blame me?” If he was untied, he would be nervously picking at his lower lip with his right hand right now. Instead, he chewed on it, worried expression clouding his strong features.

You shook your head, reaching out to fluff his brown hair. “You think too much. Why would I blame you over a breakup? If anything, I’d be dragging you out so you can help me keep a record of how many people I can fuck in a night.”

Taehyung made a face. “Why can’t you be normal and cry while eating chocolate?”

“You know I don’t like chocolate.”

“You don’t like chocolate?” Jungkook choked in disbelief.

“I have to fuck my problems away, Tae. That’s the best way to deal with them.”

He rolled his eyes. “You need to see a therapist.”

“Nah, I got you.”

Suddenly Jungkook’s face appeared because you two, sitting on the coffee table.

“How do you not like chocolate?” he pressed, staring at you.

You blinked at him. “I mean, I don’t hate it. I’m just not crazy about it like some people. Isn’t that better for you? I can give you all the chocolate that I receive.”

This thought didn’t seem to have crossed Jungkook’s mind. He grinned, highly pleased with this result.

“You’re even going to give him your chocolate?” Taehyung gasped, affronted. “That’s it, this friendship is over. I can’t believe you would betray me like this!”

You placed your hands on his knees. Taehyung huffed.

“You want me to untie you now?” you asked, patting his thigh and ignoring his dramatic outburst.

“Why? I thought we were going to have a threesome.”

Both you and Taehyung whipped your heads to blink at Jungkook. He smiled innocently, which did not look innocent at all with his sleek purple ponytail and mischievous eyes.

“Nobody agreed to that.”

“Yeah, Jungkook,” you sided with Taehyung. “Nobody agreed to that.”

“Aw, come on,” he nudged, grinning. “You guys have obviously touched each other before, right? And I can totally trust hyung not to fall in love with you.”

“Because my preferred type wouldn’t hump me in a public bathroom,” your best friend muttered.

“I’m sensing judgement here, Kim Taehyung. Watch your mouth,” you warned.

“Choke on my dick.”

“We can start with that,” Jungkook chirped cheerfully.

“Why do you want this, anyway?” You narrowed your eyes at your boyfriend. “You never expressed any interest in threesomes before. I assumed you were too selfish for that.”

“I am.”

You raised an eyebrow.

Jungkook grinned devilishly.

“But I also wanna see you get spit-roasted.”

“Don’t–” Taehyung began.

Jungkook spread his legs, revealing his erection straining in his slacks. Taehyung snapped his head away, groaning an annoyance, disappointed but not surprised that your boyfriend had zero shame. Jungkook bit his lower lip, tiny mole underneath quivering, excitement and lust in his dark brown eyes, looking right at you eagerly. He purred your name. Taehyung visibly cringed.

“You know I would…” you drawled softly, reaching over to squeeze Jungkook’s thigh. “But I don’t think Tae is into it right now.”

“Yeah, I’d only do it if I was horny and desperate.”

“Then why do you have a boner?”

Both you and Taehyung whipped your heads down to see his dick trying to bust out of his pants.

He glared at it. “You traitor.”

“Are you talking to your dick?”

“Look,” Taehyung snapped, letting out a puff of breath and frowning at Jungkook. “I’m not immune, okay? She’s hot, sure. Absolutely one of the sexiest, most beautiful women I know.”

“Aw, so sweet!” you interrupted, smacking his leg in mock bashfulness.

“And,” he gritted, shooting you a scowl. “I might be horny and desperate, sure.”

“So, what’s the problem?” Jungkook inquired, smug smirk on his face.

“Well, you’ll get jealous, for one.”

Jungkook blinked, confused. “What?”

“Taehyung has a big dick.”

You said it so nonchalantly that Jungkook was speechless.

“Mhm.”

“Not as nice as Jungkook’s dick though.”

“Excuse me? I am offended.”

“You honestly need to improve your technique. You think your size alone is all that matters? Jungkook’s the whole package, great dick, cute smile, diligence, strength, always up for anything, perfect duality–”

“Shit, shut up about him, I get it, he’s the hottest thing to walk on this earth, now stop verbally jerking him, he’s not gonna agree–”

“Kiss him.”

You and Taehyung froze.

Eyes flickering to Jungkook, who raised an eyebrow challengingly.

“Kiss him,” he repeated.

Eyes back to Taehyung, who was breathing hard.

“Only because I’m horny and desperate,” he growled.

The corner of your lips ticked upwards.

“Got it bad, eh, Tae?”

You placed your hands on his thighs, sliding down, rising off your chair. You felt Taehyung’s muscles tense, narrowing his eyes. He tried to keep up his severe front, borrowing your tendency to use arrogance to hide your true feelings.

“Isn’t that you?” he challenged. “Need me to satisfy you even though you have Jungkook now?”

You smirked, seeing right through him. “You always give me such blessed service though.”

Something flared in his brown orbs, pupils expanding as you neared. “Don’t.” Your head tilted at his tone, almost pleading, and still you advanced, your soft inhale ghosting his lips. His gaze was on your face the entire time, swallowing hard, anticipation creeping into his stern expression.

“Don’t what?” you whispered teasingly.

“Don’t say it in front of him.”

“But you like it.”

“Yeah, well, he doesn’t need to know my embarrassing turn-ons.”

“What if I slip?”

He clenched his jaw. “Fuck, fine, whatever.”

Your hand reached up to cup his cheek, licking your teeth slowly, maintaining eye contact. Your words a low hiss, laced with pure lust.

“My good little angel, let this devil corrupt you.”

Taehyung whimpered and you closed in on his lips, kissing him deeply, straddling his lap, rolling your hips into his, voracious, greedy kisses, Taehyung gasping in your mouth as you bounced on his crotch, your spread legs causing the hem of your dress to rise, popping over your ass, moaning into his mouth as you worked him under you, his body familiar and comforting. His tongue encircled yours, whining for more, and you mumbled sweet nothings to him, remembering all the things he loved to hear, and he gave you all the things you loved, the neediness in his kiss, the desperation of his hips rising to add more friction. You weren’t exactly immune to Taehyung either. You could control yourself, normally.

But Jungkook gave you the green light, so you went all in.

Your hands were in his hair, tangled in the strands of black coffee, murmuring in his lips, sweet angel, and Taehyung moaned, fiercely thrusting his hips up and you sitting down on it, already wet, sighing satisfyingly at the feeling of his impressive length straining to reach your dripping heat, too many layers of fabric between them.

“Such a good boy doing such bad things,” you purred against his lips, amused at seeing your lipstick all over his mouth.

Taehyung looked up at you with glazed brown eyes, a tinge of unease in them. Maybe he didn’t want to show Jungkook his vulnerable side. You could understand that. You didn’t mind playing your role but Taehyung was more guarded. He didn’t like to be criticized or judged for the things he liked. You noticed his gaze flicker to Jungkook and then back to you.

You tilted your head and cradled his, running your fingers through his hair. “You want me to stop, I’ll stop,” you cooed gently, kissing his ear.

“I don’t want you to stop,” he breathed, so quietly you barely heard it. “I don’t want him to judge me.”

You chuckled. “I wouldn’t worry about that.”

Taehyung made a disbelieving noise.

“Something wrong?” Jungkook asked behind you, sounding curious and confused that his show was paused.

“Mhm, need you to take my coat,” you replied, pulling back, lowering your arms so Jungkook could stand behind you and remove it. You slid your hands out elegantly, seeing Taehyung’s messy dark hair and lipstick-stained lips. You heard Jungkook back up and you reached into Taehyung’s blazer, pulling out his handkerchief and dabbing at his mouth, carefully wiping it off.

“We can stop,” your reminded him gently.

“No,” he growled, frowning. “I’ve got a massive boner and it’s all your fault. Get me off.”

You grinned. “Alright, angel.”

You saw Taehyung bite his lip, shivering at your words. You couldn’t remember how this started, but it always worked. The roleplaying helped with the whole ‘having-sex-with-your-best-friend’ thing ten times less awkward, and it made it much easier for him and you to get off.

Unfortunately, it also was starting to make both of you much hornier while having sex with each other.

Whoops.

He clicked his tongue, raising his head, eyebrow cocked.

“Dirty little devil.”

You smirked. Taehyung’s voice was always sexier when he was aroused, deep and sultry.

One by one, you undid the buttons of his dress shirt, kissing at his exposed chest, the deep rich tone of his tan skin standing out against the white, his eyes closing at your touch, running your tongue down his sternum and blowing on it.

He shuddered, moaning your name, long and sweet.

You shifted, intending to push the chair behind you back, but it was gone. Instead, your ass backed up into a pair of very muscular legs. You paused, turning your head to see behind you.

“Jungkook–”

A firm hand stopped you, forcefully jerking your head back to Taehyung’s chest.

“Look forward,” Jungkook commanded.

A shiver down your spine at his tone. You smirked, peering up at Taehyung, who smiled.

“He jealous?”

“I’m not,” Jungkook snapped, grabbing your ass.

“A little bit,” Taehyung chuckled, and now he was smirking too.

Eerily similar to you, because who else would he learn such a devious expression from? You taught him well. You hummed, yanking Taehyung’s shirt open and pushing it to his shoulders, his naked torso now exposed to your eyes and mouth.

“Can’t imagine why. This was his idea.”

Taehyung jerked his head to you as you lowered yours to his chest. “What?”

But your lips closed around his nipple and he gasped, sputtering, confused, and then moaning as you moaned, Jungkook yanking down your panties and slapping your ass with his open palm, the sting added to the disapproving hiss of your name.

“He’s not supposed to know. I didn’t do all that acting for nothing,” he snarled, and your response was wiggling your ass, nipping your teeth over Taehyung’s chest, his handsome features twisted in ecstasy and pleasure, the tip of your tongue teasing his other nipple, pushing it around with your strong, wet, warm muscle.

“Whoops.”

Taehyung narrowed his eyes at you and your not-so-innocent tone.

Jungkook clicked his tongue. “Such a bad little devil. You need some punishment.”

“He already knew?” Taehyung gritted, glaring daggers at your grinning face, saying nothing, your deft fingers undoing his pants. “Answer me, woman.”

Jungkook was positioning your lower half, ass up, legs spread, pussy exposed to his eyes and hand, your dripping core tense with anticipation. When he spoke, his voice was deep and silvery, laced with danger and desire.

“Answer him.”

And he spanked your pussy, making you cry out and leak between his fingers, the sudden sting of pain so nice, and you had the audacity to continue giving Taehyung that infuriatingly smug expression as you dragged his pants and underwear to his knees, freeing his stiff length that stuck straight up, your body repeatedly lurched forward by Jungkook’s open palm on your soaked slit, your juices splattering on his hand and the inside of your thighs. With a smirk, you lowered your head.

“Mhm, he knew… ah, fuck, yes, Jungkook, just like that…” you sighed in satisfaction, tongue snaking out and wrapping around the head of Taehyung’s cock, bobbing your mouth up and down like that, stimulating just the tip, paying extra attention to the underside of the head. “Sorry, Tae.”

“Swallow me whole,” he growled. “Now.”

You were ready to do it, of course, but you felt Jungkook’s hand clap onto your leaking, heated pussy lips, and the other danced up your back, so you waited, letting him grab your head and push you down, not quite as roughly as he would have if he was actually being mean, but with enough pressure that you knew he just wanted to do the physical action, wanted to feel the power even if there was no maliciousness behind it.

Your lips closed around Taehyung’s pulsing, hard length, taking it all, a familiar girth stretching out your jaw. You made a light gagging sound as the head hit the back of your throat, not quite suffocating, but enough to indicate, stop pushing me, and Jungkook lifted the weight off your head, still gripping your hair, messing up your perfected style of the night.

“That’s a good girl, swallowing all that dick,” he purred, sliding a finger into you.

You whined, clenching your walls around it, squeezing tight, wanting more.

“Suck.”

You did, obediently, looking up at Taehyung, his head tipping back, low moans escaping his throat as your tongue squirmed at the base of the head in your throat, muscles clinching around his cock, your lips around the base. You swiped your tongue down, stretching it out even farther, past your lips, slurping nosily at his balls, flicking them rapidly with the tip, feeling him get harder and harder, twitching against the roof of your mouth, bending a little due to the lack of space.

“Fuck, let go of her head, fuck!”

Jungkook released you and you grabbed Taehyung’s hips, starting a fast, intense pace, swirling your tongue around his cock, another long finger wiggling into your slick folds, thrusting into you from behind, your legs shaking with strain, Taehyung moaning louder and louder, filling up your apartment with his lust.

“Don’t fucking stop, fuck, you have the devil’s tongue, a-ah, it’s so fucking good…”

Jungkook scissored his fingers in you, the squelching sound loud and lewd, and you spied Taehyung tipping his head back, panting, watching Jungkook finger you from behind, his other hand smacking your ass periodically to watch it bounce and hear you moan, your hips bucking back into his hand every time you ascended from Taehyung’s cock.

“Give her another,” he gasped. “Stuff her more.”

Jungkook snickered. “For an angel, you’re all about the punishment, hm?”

But he did as he was told, shoving another finger in you and you whined, nearly popping your mouth off Taehyung’s thick length, stopping only because of imposing baritone.

“Don’t you fucking dare. Take it all. Or are you telling me you can’t? Telling me you’ve lost your touch?”

You went back down, narrowing your eyes, rising to his challenge. Your best friend knew everything about you and therefore he knew that the second he made it a question of your ability, well, that brought out the best in you.

“Fuck!”

Also made you almost vacuum his dick, but he asked for it.

“Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuuuuuuuck!”

Tighter, faster, tongue all over, nearly forgetting Jungkook was touching you at all because Taehyung had doubted you and you weren’t having that shit, fuck no, not even with Jungkook’s free hand snaking between your legs and feeling for your clit, rubbing it at the same furious pace you were blowing Taehyung’s jerking cock, tipping your head back and angling it so the head scraped against the roof of your mouth, locking your knees to prevent the shudders of pleasure from ruining your rhythm, so good, fuck, feeling so good with the pumping of Jungkook’s powerful fingers, electric satisfaction radiating from your throbbing clit, clutching Taehyung’s hips so hard he was getting indents from your nails, determined to get him there before you, and, by the sound of his breathless cries of your name and the trembling of his impressive girth, he was there.

“Yes, a-ah, you’re so good, so fucking good, I’m gonna cum, oh, fuck!”

His orgasm exploded, flooding your mouth with a gush of saltness, thick strings of cum painting the back of your throat, and you gulped it all down greedily, eyes rolling back, the tense coil inside you snapping and drenching Jungkook’s hands with your own orgasm, your legs unlocking and giving out, shaking and flinching as wave after wave of vicious pleasure flooded through you, Jungkook’s strong arms holding you up, moaning at the feeling of your pussy convulsing around his fingers, still lightly rubbing your clit through your orgasm, whines and whimpers crammed in your throat due to Taehyung’s cock in your mouth, sliding all the way to the base and swallowing around it, because you knew he loved it, wanted it, craved it, groaning carnally, the head swelling and pulsing, nearly suffocating you.

“Feels so f-fucking good… a-ah, yeees…”

You stayed in the position for as long as you could, a good minute, before backing up with a choked gasp, clutching Taehyung’s thighs, eyes drifting up to his and he looked down at you, fucked-out, content, grateful, black-brown curls falling all over his forehead and cheeks, so casually sexy and perfect.

“Good angels always taste the best,” you rasped, licking your abused lips.

Taehyung grinned.

“Untie me, devil.”

“Damn, you do have a big dick.”

“… Stop looking.”

“Why? I wanna see what she put in her mouth.”

You teased the head with the tip of your tongue, smirking. Taehyung looked away, ears turning red.

“You two are shameless.”

“Yeah, but you like it,” you laughed, straddling his lap, casually leaning over him to untie him. You heard Jungkook make a clicking sound and you assumed he was making a frame with his hands and miming taking a photo.

“Stop that,” Taehyung muttered, face full of your covered breasts. “Oi, take your clothes off if you’re gonna squash my face with your tits.”

You rammed your chest into his face to muffle his protests.

-

“Mmm, yes, no faster way to make me limp than you sucking Jungkook’s face off.”

You were too busy grabbing Jungkook’s naked ass and moaning in his mouth, tongue on tongue, purple strands brushing against your forehand, his hands on your ass and squeezing it roughly, rutting his rapidly hardening cock against your thigh.

“You want me to leave you guys alone?”

You broke the kiss, snapping your head around to see Taehyung raising an eyebrow at you from the head of your bed, completely naked. Jungkook continued slowly humping your thigh, peaking pre-cum all over and adding to his own stimulation.

“Are you done being an insufferable shit or what?” you glowered.

“Mmm, no.”

“Hmph, fine, just fuck me from behind then if you’re so needy,” you sighed, turning back to Jungkook’s amused smirk.

“No. I want the mouth again.”

You and Jungkook shared a confused look. “Huh, why?” you both said at the same time, looking at him in unison.

Taehyung lifted his chin defiantly, pointing to you. “I wanna stuff my dick into your mouth and fuck your face because you tricked me.”

You gasped, feeling slighted. “I told you it was Jungkook’s idea, why am I getting punished? You schemed against me first!”

He shrugged. “You corrupted him so, technically, it’s all inherently your fault.”

You protested as Jungkook laughed, pushing you into position despite you verbally fighting back.

“What! All I did was exist! Is it my fault that Jungkook was thirsting after my ass and you decided it would a taste of my own medicine, only to have it backfire in your face? And what if I wanna look at his handsome face? Huh? Why am I not getting a say in – mhpf!”

You yelped as Jungkook and Taehyung shoved your face first into Taehyung’s crotch, his semi-hard cock smacking you in the cheek and getting a mouthful of his nuts.

“Lick.”

They both said it at the same time. You saw them share a look of surprise, shocked that they were thinking the same thing, ignoring you.

Hey, nobody ignores you.

You wrapped your lips around one of his balls and sucked, tongue surrounding it, causing Taehyung to squeal and spread his legs, his cock swelling instantly, especially as your tongue poked out and lapped at the other while sucking intently.

“Good little devil,” Jungkook praised, patting you on the head before backing up, leaving you to rearrange Taehyung’s nuts with your mouth, licking and sucking all over, him gasping and moaning above you, falling back against the headboard.

“You’re crazy, fucking crazy…”

You switched sides, pressing your lips into his crotch to stuff your mouth full before sticking your tongue out and wiggling it on the underside of the other, his thick length now hitting you in the nose, and you realized Taehyung wasn’t going to help you with this, so you internally sighed and reached up to grab his dick and stroke it slowly as you continued your make-out session with his nuts.

Taehyung was chanting your name over and over like it was a prayer, as if he was saying it in attempt to ask for his soul to be saved.

You felt the bed bow and you lifted your head as far as it could go, which wasn’t very far because you still had one of Taehyung’s balls still in your mouth. You were still sucking on it.

He moaned above you, clutching your pillows for dear life.

You heard a condom being opened and felt Jungkook’s knees spread yours, deep silvery voice purring your name.

“Wanna see you take two dicks at once, naughty devil,” he teased, pressing the head of his cock against your soaked opening.

You unlatched your mouth and Taehyung seemed to see stars for a hot second, reeling.

“Hope you’re prepared, sweet angel,” you taunted, and then you swallowed his dick.

“Fucking shit!”

You moaned around his cock, letting it fill you to the throat, Jungkook’s perfect length thrusting into you at the same time, stretching you out deliciously, his own moan adding to your pleasure. There was just something about Jungkook’s moan, the longing, the possessiveness, the love. It made you wetter every time, bringing newfound energy to your meticulous sucking of Taehyung’s cock, who finally seemed to get his bearings and remember what the fuck was going on and what he wanted to do in the first place, because he finally straightened, large hands fitting around your head, pushing your hair back.

“You know why you’re so good at sucking dick?”

You tried very hard not to roll your eyes, already knowing what was coming. You decided to focus on Jungkook’s cock instead, pumping in and out of you, powerful, deep strokes, his hands gripping your hips, trying so hard to please you, and he was good at it, hitting all your favorite spots that made you squirm back against him.

“Because I let you suck mine,” Taehyung growled, holding your head and thrusting into your throat.

Mmmhmm, you thought to yourself. Not that he was wrong, because he wasn’t, being your first and all, but, come on, you didn’t get all your skills from sucking one dick, no matter how amazing Taehyung’s was. Oh well, you let it slide, simply enjoying not having to do much as your best friend fucked your face and your boyfriend pounded your pussy.

Ah, bliss.

The feeling of your mouth being filled and used, stroking Taehyung’s hips with your fingertips, elbows on the bed, legs spread open for Jungkook to slap his crotch into your ass wetly, back to front, a constant encompassing ecstasy that you welcomed, letting them command the pace, hands on your head and hands on your ass, familiar hands, loving hands, because even if Taehyung didn’t want to take you on dates and wake up next to you every day, he still loved you, still made sure he didn’t actually hurt you, careful to thrust hard but not deep, or thrust deep but not hard.

Jungkook wanted to take you on dates and hold you on his arm like his trophy and be waltzed around as yours, so… romantic? It was your version of romance, anyway.

And sex.

Lots of sex.

Fuck, he was so good at fucking you, leaning down, giving you more, chuckling as he heard you moaning around Taehyung’s cock, faster, harder, yes, fuck, yes, so good, your noises trapped in your chest, Taehyung increasing the speed, breathing shallowing.

“Fuck, yes, tighter, give it to me, you dirty devil,” he growled and you obeyed, closing your lips and pressing your tongue against the bottom, sandwiching his length in your mouth, your pussy also squeezing Jungkook harder, basking in his sinful moan, enamored with his voice and the way he said your name, never getting enough.

“A-ah, you feel so good, your pussy is so fucking good, gonna make me cum…”

So rough, so intense, so full of cock, keeping your holes tight, relishing in the way they forced themselves into your mouth and pussy, heady and intoxicating pleasure, you tipping over the edge, wailing around Taehyung’s thick girth as you spilled onto Jungkook’s rock-hard length, mind-numbing satisfaction that spread all over, hot and melting into you. Your walls violently spasmed and caused Jungkook to gasp, cock twitching and jolting inside you, shooting thick spurts of cum that filled the condom, and he buried himself all the way in, a wanton moan of your name echoing off your bedroom walls, savoring the feeling of you milking him, gripping your sides and squeezing you lovingly.

Suddenly, Taehyung yanked his cock out of your mouth and you coughed, startled at the abrupt loss, only for him to orgasm all over your face, hot white strings shooting out of his glistening cock and his hand guiding them, painting your cheeks and open mouth, dripping onto your tongue and clinging onto your swollen lips.

“Tae! What the fuck?!”

He snickered, smearing the residual cum on the side of your frown, winking.

“Blessed service, eh, you devil?”

-

“Is it gonna be like this every time we hang out now?”

You climbed onto Jeon Jungkook’s lap, kissing him deeper, trapping his slim waist in between your thighs, his hands sliding up your skirt, moaning into your mouth as Kim Taehyung smacked you in the shoulder blades, the sound masked by the obscenely loud music of the club as onlookers watched you and Jungkook with increasing interest.

Probably all dreaming of threesomes with you two.

“Hello, you two are supposed to be helping me getting laid, not getting laid right in front of me!”

--

masterpost

[simeonisalesbian]

Pretty eyes

I've been working on this on and off for a few months now and i finally finished it :3 So have some MC telling the boys how pretty their eyes are.

Lucifer's look like a Garnet. Arguably they’re his best feature.

“Is there something wrong with my face Mc?” Lucifer set his pen down and tilted his head in question. “You’ve been staring for quite some time now.”

Mc was supposed to be helping with some of the paperwork but they ended up starting at Lucifer as he worked instead. "Sorry I was just lost in thought for a minute there."

"Oh? What were you thinking about if I may be so bold?" Lucifer smirked, and Mc was almost certain he was aware the answer was about him.

"I was just thinking about how pretty your eyes were."

"Oh?" His eyebrows raised in question waiting for them to continue.

"They're a nice dark red like a ruby or Garnet stone. They also seem like they're almost glowing at times." They left out the part about how they seem to soften just a bit when it's just the two of them alone like this.

"Seems you've thought on this for quite some time." Lucifer chucked when Mc blushed slightly at the observation. "Either way, thank you, Mc. Compliments are always nice to hear from you." He finished going back to the paperwork that littered his desk, a smile still on his face.

Mammon's are like a pretty blue sky like I could really get lost in those fuckers. The gold in his eyes is also really cool like how there is gold in a lapis lazuli.

Mc watched as mammon excitedly explained his latest money makin’ scheme, his eyes lit up to match his bright smile.

“What do ya think?” He finished explaining, hoping for some sort of feedback from his human.

“Your eyes are really nice,” Mc said, fondly smiling at the demon who was now a blushing stuttering mess.

“Wha?! Mc- Oi-” He buried his face in his hands softly yelling for a moment. “Ya can’t just say shit like that outta nowhere!” He pouted, crossing his arms trying his damndest to look upset.

“It’s true though. I like looking at them, they're like a bright blue sky.” Mc expected Mammon to preen under the praise but instead, he got a bit smaller looking off to the side. “You don’t like them do you?”

“They look the same as the damned angels. Demons ain't supposed to have angel eyes. Makes me look weak.” Mammon refused to meet Mc’s gaze.

“The great mammon? Weak? I don’t think those fit together very well. You’re one of the strongest demons I know.” Mc insisted, hoping to boost the demon’s ego a bit. “They also remind me of Lapis Lazuli. Did you know that royalty used that stone a lot?”

Mammon looked up at the mention of royalty. “You saying I’m like a king or somethin’?” He paused thinking over it for a second before smiling widely. “I like the sound of that. King Mammon. You gotta be my second in command though ya hear?”

Levi’s reminds me of a goldfish. Like Henry. Feel like it’s lame but he’d probably just be impressed u noticed something to compliment lmao weeb boy with no confidence

“Hey, normie? Are you even paying attention still?” Levi waves a hand in front of MC’s face as they snap back to reality. ”If you didn’t want to listen to me you didn’t have to come. I get that it’s probably boring to listen to me talk on and on like this.”

Mc shakes their head. “Sorry Levi I didn’t mean to zone out and you aren’t boring me.” They were listening to him at first however the way his eyes always lit up when he talked about his special interests. “Your eyes are really nice, you know that right? They’re like…” they paused, their mind coming up a bit blank. “They're kinda like Henry 2.0 I guess. A nice golden orange… sorry that sounds kinda lame.” They turned attention back to Leviathan who was covering his face in an attempt to hide his blushing embarrassment.

“Yo-you can’t just say- say stuff like- like that normie! It’s like you’re trying to kill me here! A direct hit to my heart, It’s super effective!! Stop laughing!! I could have died MC!”

Satan's are also hard to describe because they’re such a unique greenish-blue color. The forest. They’re like the forest. They’re wild and unknown but you can’t help but wonder what lies within.

"Do I have a cat on my head again Mc?" Satan barely even looked up from his book. "You keep staring."

Mc laughed pointing at the cat that had settled on their lap a whole ago. "No, the cat is sleeping, I was just thinking."

"Oh?" Satan fumbled around on his armrest looking for something to save his page in the book."Penny for your thoughts?" He picked up a random piece of paper looking it over before closing it in his book and turning his attention to you.

"It's just your eyes, they're pretty." Mc shrugged.

"Pretty?" Satan sounded genuinely confused. Though when you think about it not many people would be calling the Avatar of Wrath's eyes pretty.

That is except for the human sitting right in front of him. "They're like a nice deep green forest. And they match the cat's." They set a hand on the cat's head as if to emphasize their point.

"Oh. That's…" Satan sat trying to figure out what to say. He apparently couldn't find the words since he just smiled before settling on "Thank you Mc. That means a lot."

Asmodeus’ are hard to explain but god they’re pretty…. They feel like the taste of the orange creamsicles. That makes no sense but that's the best way I can describe them.

“I can see you staring at my reflection darling.” Asmo smiled at Mc through the mirror on his vanity. “I don’t mind of course just wondering if you’d like something from me.

“I was just admiring your eyes, Asmo nothing big,” Mc replied simply. There wasn’t any reason to hold back any compliments from the demon, in fact, he’d be more upset with compliments being withheld from him.

“My eyes? Well, keep talking Mc. I’m sure you have lots to say about them since they’re the best in all of the Devildom after all!” Asmo quickly got up from his vanity sitting down in front of his human as if to give them a better view of his eyes.

“Well, they’re very pretty.”

“I know they’re pretty Mc.” Asmo playfully rolled his eyes. “Come on, don't hold back now. I know you have some better words in that pretty little head of yours.”

Mc tilted their head and sat thinking for a few minutes. “Well, I guess they kind of remind me of those orange creamsicles but specifically the taste of them if that makes any sense.”

Asmo giggled. “Well, it’s certainly a unique way of describing something. But I get that you can’t find words to describe something as beautiful as me. You have wonderful eyes as well darling. Only second to me of course.”

Beel’s and Belphie's are like dawn and dusk and I think that's beautiful…

Mc sat across from Beel and his twin who was snoozing away. It was quiet and peaceful for once, aside from Beel’s munching away at his pile of snacks. They smiled to themselves staring at Beel’s violet eyes.

“You okay?” Beel asked, pausing before taking another bite. His eyes shifted to a slightly more worried expression.

“Yeah, why?” Mc asked, tilting their head slightly.

“You’ve been staring at me a while now. I was worried I did something.” He smiled happy that nothing was wrong but was still curious why the human had been staring for so long.

“You didn’t do anything wrong, Beel.” Mc was quick to reassure the demon. “I was just thinking about how pretty your eyes are. They’re kinda like a sunrise you know.” Mc smiled fondly at the demon.

“You’re too sappy, it's gross,” Belphie spoke up causing the other two to turn their attention towards him. “Not to mention you sleep in too late; you probably don't even see the sunrise.” He lifted his head just enough to glare at Mc. There was no malice behind it though and felt softer than what was clearly intended.

“I’ve seen a couple here and there.” Mc shrugged now staring into Belphie’s eyes causing the demon to avert his gaze. “Your eyes are like a sunset.”

“We have the same eyes stupid. Can’t be both a sunset and a sunrise.” Belphie mumbled just enough to be heard.

“You don’t though. Beel’s eyes are more warm and optimistic like the coming of the new day, while yours are cold yet peaceful like the cover of the night sky. They’re the same yes but they’re still different.”

“That’s beautiful Mc.” Beel happily smiled as if the human had hung the stars.

His twin just mumbles something about them being gross and sappy again burying his head in his arms to hide his blush.

[jovoy]

good morning i was supposed to be going to the space center today for my sistersbirthday and my half birthday but actually we arent going. but i already got to thinking what kind of perfume would be appropriate to wear to nasa..and i was kinda stumped. my first initial reaction is marc antoine barrois ganymede which is a really weird metallic otherworldly floral (smells like an alien.) but i hate that one but i think it would fit. and so deciding against that i went through my collection and realized that i also dont have muglers alien which would obviously also be a pretty apt choice. but then i remembered i have this

and i was like oooh sci fi thats a so perfect. so its what im wearing today although to be honest as much as i love this perfume i dont feel so much like the name really fits it and im not going to the space center after all. its a really bright and acidic bitter orange in the opening that is only made more biting by the green tea note. but then as the opening fades the vanilla really comes out and to me it becomes this really beautiful and unique but still somewhat bitter creamy citrus. it really really reminds me of a creamsicle which is one of my favorite desserts and so it makes me happy🙂 i dont wear it enough cuz i tend to forget about it. i think ellis brooklyn in general is a pretty forgettable brand but this one is really special. and my mom just called me and actually we are going mini golfing now which i dont want to do but ill go anyways. so idk how appropriate this is for golfing but ill wear it anyways because i enjoy it

[jaeheewillalwaysbemyfav]

Ah, your work is so cute and it puts me in a good mood! You also have the characters personalities perfected! I was wondering if you could do a fic where maybe Mammon and MC are hanging out and MC comes out as trans (Ftm), but on accident (like Mammon sneaks a peak at his phone and noticed pride stuff and asks). Recently figured out I was and it’s been a bumpy ride and I just need a fic to cheer me up. Thank you if you do

You sir have been Most Patient, and for that I cannot thank you enough! This is super late, but I hope all is going well with you and your journey. ^-^ I also hope you still get some enjoyment out of this fic, even if it’s oh so very late.

Like… a year late. Maybe more. Probably more.

Sidebar, the setup for this feels kinda long but I also personally think it’s funny so I’m leaving it. I don’t have an editor to tell me no sooooooo :p

Content warnings: Accidental outing as trans, the mortifying ordeal of coming out, but otherwise this is gonna be pretty fluffy. 

Also, this isn’t a warning, but since I usually do gn stuff, I’m gonna be extra clear and say this fic is about a transgender male MC who uses he/him pronouns. Ladies and theydies, if you’d like your time, please wait until I’ve opened requests again and I’ll be happy to write ‘ya something.

Cis people who want to be transphobic? Why are you even here lmao

MC Comes Out as FTM By Accident (feat. Mammon)

It’s a (relatively) quiet day at the House of Lamentation. Satan is still firmly in the scheming phase of his latest prank; Lucifer is in some parlour somewhere, sipping Demonus and listening to a record that would “somberly vibrate the flesh off of your mortal bones, MC”; and Levi and the twins are livestreaming a bet about how many of the otaku third born’s figurines Beel can bench press (the latter two are under threat of 1000 years of torture if any of the merchandise is damaged).

This leaves Mammon and MC chilling on one of the House’s many frighteningly expensive couches, sometimes chatting, sometimes just silently sharing Devilgram memes with each other. 

(Asmo had been with them, but left after declaring that the sexual tension Mammon constantly radiated while around MC had become more pathetic than amusing. MC had just rolled his eyes and laughed, but judging by how many pillows Mammon had thrown his brother’s way and the dark blush on his face, he was taking the teasing more seriously.)

Personally, MC didn’t get why Mammon’s brothers gave him such a hard time. Sure he can be abrasive and his refusal to be honest despite how terrible he is at lying could get… frustrating, to say the least, but all in all he isn’t a bad person. Maybe demons are just bad at expressing genuine fondness for each other. Or maybe it just runs in the family, so to speak.

“H-hey, what are ‘ya staring at?!” Oops. MC didn’t even realize he’d been eyeing Mammon for that long. Not that he minds getting an extra eyeful of Mammon...

“Sorry, just spaced out for a minute there,” he says. 

Neither break eye contact for a long moment.

Shit, this is awkward. Think, MC, say something!

“So did you see this video of a hellhound on a trampoline—”

A glass-shattering shriek echoes through the House of Lamentation, followed by — oh that is actual glass shattering — and the plip-plap footsteps of someone running with bare, wet feet. Seconds later, a furious and appropriately damp Asmodeus comes flying down the stairs, with a weird orange and white towel on his head… Aaaaand nothing else on. MC doesn’t get to process any more than that before Mammon pounces on him, straddling him and covering his eyes with a hand.

“Asmo! What the hell are you doing, running around naked and screaming?!”

“I think you know why, you stupid scumbag!” Asmo retorts with an affronted flip of his hair. Or at least MC thinks it was his hair, all he knows is he just got lightly splashed. Why does he smell citrus?

“What are you even talking about?”

“I was going to take a nice, relaxing bath to scrub off your desperation for MC’s affections—”

“I am NOT desperate!”

“— but when I washed my hair, you know what happened?”

“...You confused orange juice for shampoo?” Mammon drawls. MC doesn’t need his vision to picture the smirk on Mammon’s face.

“How dare you,” Asmo hisses at much lower volume than before, “I would never confuse any of my bathing products.” His voice immediately returns to its regular cadence. “No, someone snuck dye into it, or replaced it, or cursed it or something! Because now,” a towel smacks wetly against the floor, “my hair looks like this!”

Mammon howls with laughter, prompting Asmo to make several sounds MC semi-confidently determines to be swears in Infernal… or whatever the native language of the Devildom is called.

He paws at Mammon’s hand obscuring his vision. If Asmo’s hair has been turned into a creamsicle by some prank gone wrong, he very much wants to see the damage. Unfortunately, Mammon doesn’t budge.

“Not that this isn’t extremely hilarious, but what does it have to do with me?”

Asmo squawks indignantly. “What does it— It was obviously you, you idiot!”

Finally, Mammon removes his hand from MC’s eyes to point an accusatory finger at Asmo and proclaim, “No way!”

The brothers’ petty argument fades into white noise as MC beholds Asmo’s hair. It truly is something else. The demon’s curls have gone from a peachy pink to a swirled mess of neon orange, with pieces of the original colour peaking through here and there. It cannot be played off as intentional or good in any way. There are even patches of his skin that are dyed orange as well. It’s pretty hilarious.

MC is starting to lose feeling in his legs.

“Uh, Mammon? You mind getting off of me?”

Eyes enormous, the Avatar of Greed does just that, and instead presses himself into the other side of the couch like a startled cat. Asmo rolls his eyes and turns his attention to MC.

“You’re not overwhelmed with the most poorly hidden crush of the millenia, right? Would you mind helping me sort this mess out?” he asks. “Think about it. It’ll just be you and me, all glistening and—”

“Not helping your case,” MC retorts, carefully keeping his eyes above Asmo’s waist, “but yeah, whatever cursed soda got into your hair stuff is probably close enough to normal stains that my tricks will help get them out. But! You need to put on some clothes first.”

“Spoilsport~ But if you insist…” Asmo smiles beatifically and saunters back to his room, making absolutely no effort to cover himself as he goes.

I’d kill for his confidence, MC thinks. He promises Mammon he’ll be back as soon as possible and takes his leave, following the trail of watery footprints.

~~~

Mammon remains folded into the corner of the couch, pouting. Of course Asmo had to come and steal MC away from him, he can’t have any time alone with him ever! There’s always some stupid shenanigans that interrupt it— 

MC left his phone. 

It’s sitting innocuously on the couch, face down. Unguarded.

Vulnerable.

He shouldn’t. He won’t! That’s MC’s phone. Mammon may be a demon, but he’s a demon with standards. He will totally respect MC’s privacy. He’s not even tempted. Who cares about some human’s phone anyway?

...What if it’s unlocked?

“Oh screw it.” 

The phone’s in his hand before the indent it left in the couch cushion can spring back in full. It is, in fact, unlocked, and open on the photos app for some reason. The photos are organized in time based folders. Mammon scrolls through the more recent ones, which consist mostly of pictures of the brothers, some with MC, some not — hey, when did MC take that picture of him?! — until he comes across a folder simply labelled “Pride”.

“Tch, they have a whole folder dedicated to Lucifer? Gross!” Mammon remarks as he opens it.

Jealous as he may not be of MC dedicating a folder to Lucifer instead of him anyone else, new pictures of Lucifer could sell for a pretty penny on the Devildom black market…

Oh. Oh. These are not photos of Lucifer. 

Mammon’s not the most knowledgeable about the human world, but he knows a Pride parade when he sees one. It looks like MC had a really nice time, smiling and laughing with a group of people in brightly coloured clothes. The album ends with a wide shot of MC and his friends in a line doing various corny poses. Each one has a distinctly coloured flag draped across their shoulders like a cape. MC’s is a 5 striped design of bright blue, pink, and white bars. The wrinkles on the flag/cape suggest it was recently unpackaged.

Something about those colours pings at Mammon’s memory, and with a bit of effort it comes to him: when MC first came to the Devildom, his phone background involved those colours! Asmo had seen it and asked him about the colour choice, to which he’d responded with some blustering nonanswer and then promptly changed the background.

Did MC… think that any of them would judge him for being trans?

“Okay,” MC declares as he re-enters the room, “Asmo’s given up and is bleaching his hair, apparently magic demon pranks go way harder...than…” 

Mammon freezes. The pair stare each other down for a few interminable seconds.

“...That’s my phone.”

“So it is…!”

“You saw the pictures, didn’t you.”

“Piiiiiiiicturrrrreessssss?” Mammon extends the word into several more syllables than is necessary. “What pictures?”

MC’s mouth does not say “Dude.” But the expression on his face very much conveys the sentiment nonetheless.

“Okay okay, I might have taken a little peek at your phone while you were gone. But it was just to make sure you didn’t leave it on! I locked it right away, I swear!”

“You’re still holding it.”

“Kuh-K-Keeping it warm! Cold phones lose battery faster!”

“...”

“Ugggggghhhhh okay! I looked a lot and saw everything! That what you wanna hear?!”

MC braces himself. “So…?”

“So what?”

“You don’t have any… questions?” he asks with a gesture towards himself.

“Uhhh, no?” Mammon pauses. “Oh wait, yeah, I have one.” Here we go. “ ‘MC’ and he/him pronouns are the right junk to call you by, yeah?”

MC blinks owlishly. “Yup— Uh, yeah, they are. Been that way for a while now… You really don’t—”

“MC,” Mammon says with a sharp toothed grin, “you really think humans are the only ones who get unsatisfied with what meat vessel or titles they’re assigned by the big man upstairs?”

Understanding bonks MC on the head with the same delicacy that Mammon carelessly tosses his phone back with. “Wait, r—”

“Let me show you how cool the Devildom trans flag is.”