#it doesn’t help that they basically live in a magical fairy forest

[cadaverre]

i have no concept of time so i’m sitting on a rock near my friends house bc i got here half an hour early and this has happened WAY TOO MANY TIMES with this specific friend

[irafuwas]

stream of consciousness notes for book 7 chapter 3

babbling and spoilers ahead

First scene notes

the first room that grim and yuu wake up in is within mickey’s dream. Mickey says he can’t use magic, the items that move around in his dream room move on their own

the “mickey” that is with them is when he leaves his body while he’s asleep. Grim figures his and yuu’s bodies must still be passed out on the floor in diasomnia then

mickey says that after he falls asleep in bed and he leaves his body, when he enters the mirror that hangs above the fireplace in his room, that’s when he gets to this dream room they’re in now. He tried before to enter the mirror while awake but it didn’t work

after mickey wakes up and disappears, a bunch of black gooey stuff shows up and starts attacking grim and yuu. Silver swoops in and calls it “Darkness” (闇). He says it if touches you, you will be put into an even deeper sleep

silver’s UM notes

Can only be activated when he is asleep AND when he realizes that he is in a dream

He is able to “cross” between dreams. He calls the sky-like space that he enters when moving from one dream to another the “dream corridor/corridor of dreams”

If you’re touching him when he crosses dreams, you’ll be able to cross with him

He cannot choose the person whose dream he enters, but it is easy for him/typical to cross over into the dreams of people he’s close with. So he is surprised he went into mickey’s dream that one time.

He can tell who is the dreamer because he sees a bird that emits rainbow colored light flying around them. Grim and yuu couldn’t see it flying around sebek, so it seems only silver can see it

He cannot go into people’s minds, per se. He describes it as “what one sees within one’s heart, the world of imagination borne from one’s memories and desires”

He still doesn’t fully comprehend his UM nor all the special characteristics of dreams

Often, when he wakes up, he can’t remember what happened in the dream

Mal notes

The energy field is slowly and gradually entombing a wider and wider radius around sage’s island. S.t.y.x. fears that it will eventually swallow the whole world

Normally, you could just wait for an overblotter’s magic to run out and then their UM would go away, but some fae are able to draw in magic energy from nature around them. Mal seems to be doing this, so his magic reserves are basically limitless

s.t.y.x with the help from BV tried breaking through the energy field but neither magic or physical attacks are getting through. When the fae or humans got to close to it, they would get dragged in by the thorns and trapped on the island

time on sage’s island has stopped at 21:18

the mal seen in idia and sebek’s dreams is the real mal. He is observing them and making sure they stay asleep/continue dreaming happy dreams

every living thing (well not plants I assume) on sage’s island is trapped in sleep. All the students, the towns people, the RSA students, the animals, the fish, the insects. Ortho is the only one on the island who is awake

Mr. Shroud feels déjà vu when seeing the island covered in thorns. He later realizes its because the sight bares a striking resemblance to the legends of the thorn fairy, of which illustrations remain in old literature

Mrs. Shroud adds that it's an ancient form of magic "area domination/domain control" (領域支配) where you "can change/alter everything within the domain at will"

end scene notes

when mal tries to put them into a deeper sleep, silver sees an auroral light. It seems to be the light from the ring his father gave him. Silver asks for his father’s help and they do end up in lilia’s dream like he wanted (possibly the ring’s doing?)

silver recognizes the forest and the smell of the wind

sebek can understand what the three goon-looking creatures are saying. The creatures think they are “The Iron Ones”? （鉄の者） sebek seems to know that phrase, as he says no they’re not

silver reacts in surprise when one of the creatures says something right before lilia appears. Maybe silver can also understand them?

lilia tells them “silence, humans”. He speaks threateningly.

the rainbow bird flies around lilia, so its his dream

[mari-lair]

Here’s a short AU inspired by This Amazing Draw

Akane is the son of a teacher and a knight, cursed from birth to die in “The very first hour of the very first day of 1704” , which gives him 17 years to live. He does not want to die at 17, so he convinces his parents to let him find a cure.

He doesn’t have that much money, so he grabs rides with fishermen, warriors, explorers, pirates, anyone that’s willing to take him in, in hopes he’ll be able to find a witch capable of breaking this curse. He always earns his passage for every trip with manual labor, and ocasionally get hosts nice enough to let him spend some ink and send letters to his parents.

Magic is a very rare thing to find, so no mater how wild the trip, Akane usually hit dead ends.

Teru is a warrior princess, studying magic in the forest, she is wildly respected for helping out when needed, said to be a 'fairy’, and constantly putting spells on herself, until almost no one misgenders her.

Teru set sail in hopes to find a rose rumored to grant people wishes, needing her kingdom to flourish after all the curses from a recent war turned the soil infertile. She does find the blue rose after a few weeks, but instead of getting her land to prosper right now, she was sent 500 years in the future.

Akane is surprised to see someone with old armor knocked out in an isolated part of an island people swore was abandoned (it's what the researchers he has been traveling with assured him) but he helps the person out, suspecting the symbols in their shoulder plate are magic runes and desperate for hints.

Turn out, Teru and Akane do not speak the same language.

When Teru explains her situation through lightning images, Akane is very confused at first, cause he must be getting something wrong? There is no such thing as a monarchy after all, and the city Teru tried to illustrate does not exist anymore?? But he is able to connect the dots eventually, sharing that his curse was a result of his mother finding this same species of blue rose and wishing for it to heal a curse she had gotten while being a knight, which did heal her, but passed the curse to her son.

The flowers are never kind when granting wishes, it’s why Akane ignored all the blue roses on this island, hoping to find something else to heal himself, but admitting he knows very little of magic.

Not everything was communicated well with his sand drawings, but Teru got the overall gist of it.

They team up.

It wasn’t Akane’s original plan, but Teru dragged him everywhere until he got the memo that she want him to stick around. And while Akane doesn’t want to leave the time traveler to fend for herself he really doesn’t have the time to go around trying to find a way to go back in time when he only has four months to live.

He can't deny it is awfully convenient to have a magic warrior princess as his company, cause wow, people will pay a lot for a magic show and now he doesn't have to pick and chose his ships, he can pay to board basically any ride... Amazing.

They go from not understanding a single thing the other want and yelling about everything “Teru why do you have a water bucket? TERU DON’T THROW WATER IN THE BOAT ENGINE, YOU’LL GET US KICKED OUT!!” and “Akane don’t touch that, can’t you see the ruins are cursed? AKANE STOP IT YOU STUPID-” to being able to communicate with looks alone after two long months.

Teru learns the basics of modern language relativaly quickly (she much prefers her own "ancient" language and will use it as much as possible, usually to tease Akane) and is able to go more in dept about her kingdom's problem. Akane shares that the curse she speaks of is in the storybooks and Olive is the one plant that overcame the destroyed soils.

By the time they find a clock that is able to move through time, Akane only has three days to live, so Teru drags him back in time with her, as far away from 1704 as possible.

Akane was grumpy about it, “You should have at least asked before doing such a huge decision for me, you piece of shit! What will my parents think??” but in the end, Teru let him live with her, and she did basically save him, so his anger doesn't last.

Both are unaware Akane will live for 500 years though.

[webotixae]

Techniques for Youthful Glow And Combat Wrinkles (2024)

1. Drink Your Wrinkles Away!

Forget young forever; think hydrated forever! You know how a raisin is just a grape that forgot to drink its water? Well, let’s grape-ify our lives, folks. Hydration is skin gold. Drinking at least eight glasses a day is like feeding your skin a delicious, age-defying potion that not even fairy tales can concoct. Consider infusing your water with lemons, cucumbers, or trendy herbs like mint to make it more exciting. Cheers to gulping wrinkles down the drain!

2. Laughter as Therapy

Believe it or not, laughter is the best (non-invasive) facelift you can give yourself. When you laugh, you release endorphins, which combat stress — a major wrinkle perpetrator. So, binge-watch comedies, subscribe to dad joke Twitter accounts, or attend that stand-up show. Besides, laugh lines are totally charming; they’re like little parenthesis framing your face, saying, “This person has an excellent sense of humor!” Let’s face it, wrinkle-free doesn’t mean laugh-less!!

3. Vitamin C to the Rescue!

Vitamin C serum is like the robin hood of skincare; it steals the damage caused by free radicals and gives it back to your skin in the form of beautiful radiance. Slather on some vitamin C serum every morning, and watch as your skin begins to glow with the fervor of a thousand fireflies. Pro-tip: Get yourself a topical vitamin C product labeled “ascorbic acid” for maximum efficacy. Citrus is your way to complexion perfection!

4. Chemical Peels

Chemical peels involve the application of a chemical solution to the skin, which exfoliates the outer layers and stimulates the production of new skin cells. This process helps improve skin texture, reduce fine lines, and even out skin tone. There are different types of chemical peels, ranging from superficial to deep peels, and the choice of peel depends on the specific concerns and skin type of the individual.

5. Dermal Fillers

Dermal fillers are injectable products designed to restore volume, smooth lines, and enhance contours in the face. These fillers are commonly made of hyaluronic acid, a naturally occurring substance in the skin that helps maintain hydration and suppleness. When injected into areas with wrinkles or volume loss, dermal fillers can add structure and fullness to the skin, reducing the appearance of wrinkles and folds.

6. Sleep Like a Pro

Consider this a direct directive from Beauty on High: get your sleep! Your skin repairs itself during sleep, so skimping on those vital Z’s is basically inviting Mr. Wrinkle for a sleepover. Aim for 7–9 hours nightly and make it quality sleep. Invest in silk pillowcases (they minimize friction, aka wrinkle-causing pressure), and keep your bedroom a serene, restful haven. If sheep-counting fails, try hypnotizing yourself by imagining the crow’s feet dissolving from your face.

7. Don’t Forget the SPF!

You wouldn’t play a video game without saving your progress; don’t live life without saving your skin! SPF is your save button. Ultraviolet rays are the insidious little scoundrels that speed up the aging process by breaking down collagen. Layer on broad-spectrum SPF 30 (at the very least) each day, rain or shine. And don’t think of it as a chore — imagine you’re an adorable vampire avoiding sunburns and turning into glitter like in a bad YA novel.

8. The Power of Green Tea

If you’re not a fan of green tea yet, become one. Green tea is rich in antioxidants, particularly one called EGCG (epigallocatechin gallate, if you love tongue twisters). This wonder-molecule helps renew skin and cells, fighting damage and prolonging that youthful glow. Sip on a daily green tea, or for a combo attack, apply chilled green tea bags to your eyes to depuff and refresh. Think of it as a spa day but cheaper and with better snacks.

7. The Fountain of Youth in Sweat Form

You thought the fountain of youth was some magical water source deep in a forest? Nay! It’s your local gym or even your own living room. Regular exercise boosts circulation and immunity, bringing more oxygen and nutrients to your skin. Plus, it’s a natural stress-buster. Whether it’s yoga, jogging, or aggressively swiping your credit card (retail therapy counts, right? ), get moving. The youthful glow will follow.

8. Essential Oils to the Rescue

Essential oils are like the Swiss Army knives of the skincare world. There’s one for almost everything! For wrinkles, look no further than rosehip seed oil, jojoba oil, and even a light touch of frankincense oil. These oils are packed with vitamins and fatty acids that hydrate and rejuvenate skin. Just remember, a little goes a long way — no one wants to look like they’ve had a stressful life.

Tired of those wrinkles giving away too many of your secrets? Maybe it’s time to try some non-cosmetic procedures, like chemical peels and dermal fillers. Just promise me you'll go to the best aesthetic gurus in Dubai at Kotobuki Clinic. We're not bragging... okay, we are—Number 1 Aesthetic Clinic! Let us handle your beauty concerns so you can focus on staying fabulous.

[sh3riffs]

Empires’ Headcanons! (I deisided this will chronicalized all my headcanons) ;P

- The Ocean Queen was adopted by Mezalean nobility, and was the primary architect of the Ocean Empire, as she felt drawn to the Ocean and Seas..

- The Codfather was founded by the Cod Council, and was raised by them..

- Lady Katherine is originally from a highly respected family that lived in Gilded Helianthia..

- The part of Gilded Helianthia where Pearl rule was a city-state..

- Count fWhip and Wizard Gem are dragon-hybrids..

- Lord Sausage and Pearl are cousins..

- Katherine and Jimmy are cousins, due to their surnames being implied to be hyphenated, Elizabeth-”Gaming” and Solidarity-”Gaming”..

- Sausage and Shelby are haft-siblings, I just like their dynamic..

- Shelby and Pirate Joe are cousins as well..

- “Sausage” is his surname, as his character full name is “Mythical J. Sausage”.. (Basically he prefer to be called by his surname rather then his first name..)

- On the topic of surname, in goblins culture, they do not have legal surname, and are often differentiated by their occupation or status..

- Pearl is asexual aromantic..

- Jimmy is asexual..

- Sausage is aromantic, and Katherine is on the aromantic spectrum..

- Some of the gods Joel forgot about are Aeor, and Exor, as well as the Ocean Queen and the Codfather.. and obviously Pearl, who he remembers as “Peril”..

- Joel and Pearl are both mortals who ascended to godhood..

- The Copper King, Pixl was also a god, but never started out as a mortal, and his often seen as the God of Life and Resurrection, a foil to Pearl if you will.. (This can serve symbolism like, Pearl who lived in a fertile forest is the Goddess of Death, while Pixl living in a dry dessert is the God of Life, something something yin and yang..)

- The religion that worship Pearl is the main religion of the Empires’ World.. However she is seen differently depending on the Empire or Kingdom you in.. Offen seen as the Goddess of Harvest, Death and War or Combat..

- The Ocean Queen is seen as the Goddess of the Sea, while the Codfather is considered God of Swamps, Rivers and Streams, though they’re are often seen as a pair..

- Joel is seen as a God of Thunder, Lightning and Hurricanes or the God of Storytelling.. (Lore basically..)

- Gods are normally over 20ft with Joel being the only exception, as Queen Lizzie and the Codfather doesn't count, being demigods, and even being taller then other demigods, being sea creatures as well..

- When the other gods was still around they would shapeshift to Joel’s height or shorter to make him feel better, this combine with his canon bad memory, is why he have a false imagine of being average height, or taller then average..

- Hermes came to life with the mind and body of a 8-9 year old child..

- Hermes is semi-mute..

- Hermes started off as a shulker so they can shoot shulker bullets..

- The Empire Pixl is restoring was first constructed after the rapture, mainly by people of Gilded Helianthia and Mythland, but serve as a safe place for any citizen who Empire was destroyed..

- Lady Katherine help construct and was the first queen, of GlimmerGrove..

- Only non-human that are aloud in GlimmerGrove are fairies and anthropomorphic animals, even tho, the people are wary of them. Magic Users have take an oath, and promise not to use magic in the confined of the Kingdom, as they believe a witch or wizard might had somehing to do with the Queen having a “curse” baby..

- Lizzie is very keen on learning, and is very knowledgeable on history, mainly of the Ocean Empire, Codlands, and Lost Empire, being the citizen mainly descended from their..

- Lizzie wear crutches..

- Critter City is a city-state..

- Animalia is a communist country..

- GilmmerGrove have colonies..

- Katherine was raise to whole a racial bias against non-human.. Katherine herself had thought past this as she been isolated by her own kingdom for being “curse.” But still whole prejudices on other species..

- After meeting Katherine, Shelby started working out, trying to impress her..

- Not acknowledging the Ancient Capital.. Stratos and GilmmerGrove are the oldest standing Empires, with Stratos being the oldest..

- Not acknowledging False’s Empire, and Olipoligo, the youngest Empires are Animalia, Eversea, and the Evermoore, Animalia being less then 100 years old, with Father Floof still being alive, and Eversea and the Evermoore only just being built..

- Gem and fWhip is autism spec. while fWhip also have Adhd along with Shelby, with Shelby having more of the attention aspect and fWhip with more of the hyperactivity..

- Pixl is originally from Tumble Town..

- Everyone who was on Alsmp exist in the Empires’ Universe..

- Seapeekay reside in Animalia..

- Meghan and Mika goes to the Shelby’s Witch Academy..

- Lauren reside in Chromia..

- Gem is an Haft-Elf, a Sun Elf specify, and as Sun Elves are elitist, it can add onto Gem trying to fine her own identity, as well as contribute to why she may have a “Princess” title..

- fWhip, Lizzie, Jimmy and Shelby are the shortest rulers..

- Joey, Gem, Katherine, and Joel are the tallest rulers..

- False was isekai’d from the main Hermitcraft universe or the alternate universe where Mumbo became mayor..

- Shelby, Sausage, and Pixl descended from people of the Crystal Cliffs..

- Scott and Jimmy descended from people of Mezalea..

- Gem descended from the people of Mythland and Gilded Helianthia..

- Katherine descended from the people of House Blossom..

- The people of Sausage old Empires mostly descended from the Mezalea, Crystal Cliffs and Gilded Helianthia..

[ohlookanothercartoontofallinto]

@imprisioned-in-the-hole in the tags of the prince and the pauper au raised me Link in the Swan Lake, which I turned around and said. challenge accepted. Give me any characters I know and love and I will make a functional au with them. 

I did decide to go with Zelda as the main lead in this one though. 

Once upon a time in a kingdom far away there lived a baker, Gaepora, and his two beautiful daughters. The fearless and outgoing Artemis, and the shy and more timid Sun. One day while Sun was hard at work, a purple bunny made the town stir. With everyone trying to capture it. Sun did not, she only watched. Seeing the poor thing get tangled up in ropes. She followed it into the deep woods. Through a cave and out into a magical grove with a lake. The poor bunny was now trapped in some brighers. She approached it carefully attempting to calm him. Then the animal spoke. He very quickly informed her his name was Ravio, and asked if she would be so kind as to help him. Sun agreed quickly, finding a crystal in the stone wall to cut him free. 

Dazzling the onlookers, The Fierce Deity, King of the fairies and ruler of the enchanted forest. By his side was a Fairy, Otter, two wooden children, and a Seagull. Navi, Tetra, Fado, Saria, and Marin were their names. The king approached the young woman explaining how she is now the savior of the forest because she pulled the stone. Deities' evil cousin Majora and his (Something) Veran, have been slowly taking over the forest, and draining the king's magic. However now that Sun is here she can save them all. Sun is apprehensive and explains she’s no hero. She can not do as the Deity wishes. He understands and commands Ravio and Tetra to take her safely back to the village. 

However, Majora appears, and threatens Sun, deciding it would be funny to toy with the girl. Turning her into a White and Pink loftwing. Which backfires on the Evil fairy seeing as she is now twice his size. Sun does the rathenal thing and pecks him. Because of the curse, Sun is now forced to reside in the enchanted forest, and be the holder of the crystal. As loftwing by day, and a human by night. 

Now that we have the basic premise down I can write a bit weirder now. 

Switch over to the castle, where the king and queen and their 8 sons live. The oldest, Prince Sky, is playing with his youngest brother Wind, who he promised to take hunting. Unfortunately Sky has to break his promise because of a royal ball that will be taking place in 3 months.  Everyone expects the heir to the throne to choose his bride during the dance and it is stressing the prince out. Prince Wind decides to go hunting alone. Being led into the enchanted forest by Majora, in hopes that he will shoot Sun. Wind, believe it or not, is not a good hunter and Sun just walks up behind him, curious. 

 "AAHH Giant big BIRD! But dang you are really pretty!” ''Oh um thank you." "AH GIANT TALKING BIG BIRD!" "Not the brightest are you?" "AH TALKING OTTER!" Which is the start to a beautiful friendship. 

Wind starts visiting the enchanted kingdom from evening to midnight on a fairly regular basis. 

Causing Sky to grow more and more upset. Because he feels his younger brother is dodging him on purpose. Rational assuming, "He's mad at me for not taking him hunting that day and now he’s pulling away from his oldest big brother, who he once loved!" "Sky stop being dramatic, he's probably just doing something he doesn't want anyone to know about." “Oh right he’s a teen now and they like their secrets…Well, I guess I’m following him now!” “Sky, no” 

He does it anyway. Finding it quite strange that his little brother is going into unknown woods by himself. Not concerning at all. Him casually walking towards a giant bird creature that looks legendary. Now that’s concerning. Sky would pull out his bow and point an arrow at Sun, it’s his baby brother what do you expect. 

“WIND DON’T GO NEAR THAT THING!” “Sky?” Wind quickly guards Sun arms stretch out wide. "SKY PUT THE BOW DOWN!" "GET AWAY FROM THE BIRD" "PUT THE BOW DOWN!" Which by this time Sun would turn back into human causing sky to go into himbo mode because. Oh dang, she's beautiful.

And thus starts our romance. For the next two months, Wind and Sky would go to the Enchanted forest. Hoping they could do something to release the people from the Majora curse. Sky and Sun grow closer and closer, and by this point everyone is just shocked they are not together yet. While those two are getting closer, Wind and Tetra are researching for answers. Which they find. 

“To break the curse, a declaration of undying love to all the world, must be made to Sun….Seriously? That seems really stupid and a real oversight on the crystal side." "What do you mean?" "I mean is Sun's heart connected to the crystal now? And whoever she loves, so your brother. Does the crystal make their heart one? If the magic dies within it will they both pass? Like what's going on here?" “So all she needs is a declaration of undying love to the world?” “Apparently?” “Perfect, Sun will attend the royal ball with me!” “W–what?” “There will be kings and queens from all over the world there. If I proclaim my love it will be to the whole world.” “Yes, yes I will go with you.” 

Majora can not allow that to happen, and creates a necklace for Veran to wear that tricks sky into thinking that she’s sun. To keep Sun at bay for a while he kidnaps Ravio and takes him to his dark palace. This is barely an inconvenience and they save Ravio relatively fast. 

Back at the ball the royal family is a bit confused by Sky's choice of women. (Remember they see Veran as Veran) "Oh...is this why he didn't tell us about her?" While Wind is over in the corner, internally screaming. "THAT SURE AS HECK IN NOT SUN THE WOMEN HE LOVES"  

Out of the corner of his eye he sees through the window guards rushing towards somewhere and he quickly follows. Finding sun in her Loftwing form be attacked by the guards. He rush towards her screaming at the guards. "DON'T YOU DARE LAY ANOTHER HAND ON HER! Sun!" Cute little prince head hug from the prince. Wind realizes what’s going on but knows it's too late so all he can do is get Sun to fly back to the forest, maybe just maybe she will be able to survive there. She would pull the youngest prince on her back and go. Sadly as their flying, sky confesses his love to Veran and Sun just feels it, it shatters her heart, and she starts to go down. 

Thankfully crashing into the enchanted forest. About that same time guards come in saying the youngest prince has been kidnapped by a large bird pink and white. Which only Sky knows what that means.

Pulling out his sword he violently swing it at Veran slashing her across the chest and breaking the necklace confirming his greatest fear. He would scream violently, and Time, Twilight and Warrior would have to hold him. All while Majora laughs maniacally at him, causing Malon, Legend, Four, and Hyrule. To be on guard and pull out their weapons. 

“WHAT DID YOU DO, WHAT DO YOU DO!” Sky scream pierced the heavens. “Oh, it’s not what I did, little prince it’s what you did.” 

Somehow, Sky would be able to escape his father and brothers and rush to the forest, heavy tears streaming down his face. 

Back in the enchanted forest Fierce Deity, and his crew would find Sun and Wind, Sun is fading fast, and Wind’s out cold with a broken arm. They bring them back to the lake only to be met by Majora. Who is insistent on getting that crystal. Deity, would take a stance, though he is weak he will do everything in his power to protect his children. They would have epic battle. 

During the battle, Sky would arrive, checking in on his brother real quick, Tetra has him so he’s fine. Then rushing to Sun. 

“Sun…” “Sky, I…I feel so weak.” “Sh sh, I’m here. Please Sun, that declaration was for you…it was for you.” “I know…I love you Sky.” “Sun…” She slides the crystal into his hands and fades. “Sun! No no please Sun I love you too.” Kiss her on the forehead. 

As sky holds her, Majoa throws a mask at the group. The mask of the Fierce Deity. 

“Now that was fun, now hand over that crystal boy or do I need to take it by force.” 

Sky would scream and just go ballistic on Majora. With the crystal, turning into a sword. (Only because of the love that was shared between Sun and Him) They fight for a bit then, the prince look back to see Wind holding Sun, crying, and that be the catalyst. Sky would wreck him. Destroying Majora, and allowing the power of the crystal to explode throughout the entire Enchanted forest. Freeing everything that was hurt by majora. (Also healing Winds arm in the process) 

Sky would lip back over to his brother and the love of his life and just ingulp them in a hug. Whispering sweet messages to Sun begging her to wake up. Which she does, and falling on top of him kissing sky sweetly as they lay on the ground. 

AND NOW HAPPY ENDING! Sun is reunited with her family. She marries Sky. The royal family are delighted to find out the whole story, and wind makes many a trip to the enchanted forest to hang out with his friends, and in the very far future wife. 

Hope you enjoyed it.

[trivalentlinks]

Does anyone want to collaborate on writing a Cinderella retelling that’s basically a fusion of Cinderella with a twist on the Russian fairy tale Vasilisa the Beautiful?

Vasilisa the Beautiful is essentially already a Cinderella retelling with a magic doll Vasilisa’s mom gave her in the place of the fairy godmother, and Baba Yaga as an additional villain (who inadvertently kinda helps Vasilisa by getting rid of her evil stepmother and stepsisters, but she doesn’t do this to be helpful; she doesn’t know that the stepmother/stepsisters are evil). Vasilisa ultimately ends up with the Tsar 

What I have in mind is a similar Cinderella/Vasilisa retelling, but without the doll and with Baba Yaga as simultaneously an additional villain AND the fairy godmother. 

The premise is this (I’m open to changing almost anything, and there’s a lot to be filled in): 

(This premise is written colloquially, but I would eventually like the story to read like an actual fairy tale.)

The story starts the usual way, with a recently orphaned Cinderella (or Vasilisa the Beautiful, I could go either way) living with her evil abusive stepmother and stepsisters.

The stepmother and stepsisters want to get rid of her so they come up with a plan.

On the day of a major festival, when everyone else in the village has gone off to the festival and Cinderella and her stepmother and stepsisters are the only ones home, the stepsisters put out every fire in the house.

Cinderella gets very confused by this, and is like, "but we need fire, all the fires have gone out".

But the stepmother and stepsisters are like, "*we* don't need fire, we have these warm clothes and such. If *you* need fire, then go get some."

"But where would I get any?” Cinderella asks. “All the villagers have gone to the festival?"

And her stepmother tells her, "Go out into the forest and follow the large bird tracks, and you will find the Kind Old Lady Baba Yaga, who will give you some fire."

[Note for the unfamiliar: Baba Yaga is a recurring character in Russian fairy tales. She's an evil witch/monster who kill people (especially children) and eats them. However, she always honours her deals.]

So Cinderella goes out into the woods and she follows the tracks and she has to climb a wall made of skulls and it gets darker and scarier and the path is illuminated by these lit up skulls, etc, etc, but she finally finds Baba Yaga's hut.

So Cinderella tells Baba Yaga that she's freezing and the fires in her home have gone out and asks her for some fire.

Baba Yaga stares at her like “Good lord, Child, do you not know who I am?”

Cinderella tells her what her stepmother and stepsisters told her, that the Kind Old Lady Baba Yaga would give her some fire.

And Baba Yaga is like, "well that's kind of sus, do you often do things like climb a wall made of skulls and walk a totally dark path through scary woods just for a little bit of warmth?"

And Cinderella's like, well not exactly but [other terrifying things I've done/endured in exchange for food and shelter] and Baba Yaga is like, okay that's Very Sus, Actually.

Baba Yaga is not a good person, she's an evil witch who kills people, so she offers Cinderella a deal where Cinderella has to do three impossible tasks for her and if she succeeds, Baba Yaga gives her some fire, and if she fails, Baba Yaga kills and eats her.

And Cinderella's like "Okay good deal" and does the impossible tasks through creativity, efficiency, skill and by befriending all the little critters in Baba Yaga's house.

(I have not decided what all the tasks are, but I would like them to impart Important Skills for Cinderella to be able to survive on her own eventually. One of them should teach her how to spin and weave.)

(In the Vasilisa story they are just random tasks and the magic doll mostly does them for her.)

But then in the end Baba Yaga doesn't give Cinderella any fire and instead gives her a skull, and says that once she goes home she'll get her fire.

So Cinderella goes home with the skull and the instant she brings it inside, it lights up every fireplace in the house and also burns Cinderella's stepmother and stepsisters to death. (Or it could be something a bit less evil than this, but Baba Yaga is not a good person, she's an evil witch who kills people, so I think this would probably be the best that she could do.)

But now Cinderella's all alone in this big old house, but Baba Yaga taught her how to survive. And then we follow the rest of the Vasilisa story: she works as a cloth-maker, starting out as an assistant to the local cloth-maker, and eventually running the business, and getting noticed by the Tsar, who is so impressed that he comes out to Cinderella's village to find her and marry her.

And they live happily ever after.

------

It’s Very Similar to the Vasilisa story, but without the doll, and with Baba Yaga a bit more humanized and intentional about helping Vasilisa get rid of the evil stepfamily and survive a world without them. (Maybe because she sees a little of herself in Vasilisa.)

[saiki-in-jsl]

[heads in hands]

Kubokai Cinderella AU very possible.

[hands in heads]

Saiki as fairy god father.

[holds back tears]

I’m gonna talk about this right now. Ready? Go.

Cinderella Kubokai AU

Look, everyone, when I said Cinderella Kubokai AU, I think your automatic thinking would be; “Oh! Kaidou Shun would be Cinderella right?”

Wrong. In fact, we’re going to toss the idea of Cinderella out the window right now but keep the foundations of it: Local villager marries royalty with the help of magic.

Presenting: Prince Kaidou Shun.

Prince Kaidou has problem interacting with girls, he thinks they’re cute and all, he thinks they’re flattering, but whenever he encounters one all he can think is; “Just like my sister!”

Like seriously, even when the woman is nothing like his sister, he’d still think that. It’s like his automatic assumption when he doesn’t feel romantic feelings towards them.

Anyway his strict but concerned mother decides, “Yeah, Plan D, let’s hold a Royal ball.” You wouldn’t want to know what the previous plans were (nothing harmful, just embarrassing).

Now here’s the twist; Saiki Kusuo, the fairy god father, isn’t actually with Kuboyasu. In fact, there is no evil family members involved (if you don’t count the fact that, yes, Kuboyasu comes from a line of bandits).

Saiki Kusuo actually lives in the castle with Kaidou because his older brother is the royal advisor, Kaidou’s personal tutor, and the occasional inventor.

Instead of hair clips, Kusuo wears special earrings that keep his powers in check. Most of his abilities are still identical to his psychic abilities, but they are labeled as magic.

He, along with Nendou Riki (a knight that came from a family of knights), act as Kaidou’s friends but also bodyguards.

Anyway, Kaidou’s distressed because he doesn’t exactly want to have a ball. Sure, he likes them generally, he gets to wear nice clothes, dance, act all princely (that part isn’t much fun, but ehh) but this ball is different.

Kusuo doesn’t care for things like these, but he does grow sympathetic after two hours of Kaidou complaining, so he forms a plan;

During the ball, Kusuo would sneak Kaidou out the castle and pretend to be the prince. Since Kusuo’s skilled at turning down women, he thinks it’ll be an easy (though annoying) night for him.

Kaidou agrees, but the problem is; even though Kusuo is able to replicate Kaidou’s identity, his earrings would still remain. They’re specially made for him, so it practically works as a collar on a dog.

They manage to solve that problem by making a pair of earrings that sorta looks like Kusuo’s, if not a little weirder in color and shape, and Kaidou will wear it throughout the day on the night of the ball. Like that, his family would easily be fooled.

Ball arrives and the plan goes accordingly (when asked, Kaidou says he liked Kusuo’s earrings so much that he got a pair to match), so Kusuo sneaks Kaidou out the castle.

“I’ll have outside help look after you, so don’t worry. Unless your life is in immediate danger, they won’t appear so you can relax.” Kusuo has already morphed himself to appear like Kaidou and the boy thinks that it’s insanely creepy.

Here the story splits into 2; Kusuo’s adventure and Kaidou’s adventure. I’ll talk about Kaidou’s then Kusuo’s in a different post (maybe).

Kaidou enjoys a nightly walk in the village in his almost too big hooded coat, taking in the homely scenery. Everything feels...softer, their wooden walls seem much more welcoming than the stoned ones in the castle.

Of course, the number one rule in the village is to not go out at night for too long, because you never know when-

“Hey,” Kuboyasu, the bandit, has made an entrance! What will he do? A. Fall in love. B. Fall in love. C. Fall in love. D. Attempt to rob Kaidou.

You guessed it! D.

“Give me everything you have, including those earrings.” Kuboyasu says, and it’s a bit too dark to make out the face he’s making, but Kaidou thinks the darkness literally enhances the threatening look. Though, the man doesn’t even have a weapon.

Unless he’s going to rip Kaidou apart with his bare hands.

Then Kaidou starts bawling, but not the loud screaming kind, it was the soft sniffling one. The kind that basically meant; “Why me?”

Kuboyasu does a double take because he doesn’t know what to do when his victim starts sniffling soft sobs. He was never taught what to do.

“Oh- Uh- Okay. Sorry. Don’t...cry...” Kuboyasu may be a thief, but he ain’t an asshole. He awkwardly pats Kaidou on the shoulder. “I was just joking! It’s not safe to be out in the dark like this so I was just trying to...” He feels bad.

Okay, new plan, he thinks, I’ll just take the pretty boy with me, let him stay in my home then take his things and take off.

Because actually, Kuboyasu doesn’t exactly live in this village. Him and his gang are littered around, staying in places, because they heard about the ball and thought they could raid a few carriages when they arrive. Some of them did manage to achieve their goal and were about to stay a bit longer just to relax before heading off again.

“I thought jokes were supposed to be funny,” Kaidou frowned, already calming down, and wow does this boy have a tongue. Kuboyasu’s only a little bit less guilty now.

“Do you want to stay at my place till the sun comes up? It’s the least I could do to apologize.”

Kaidou thinks about it. Wow! Sleeping in a commoner’s home! Exciting!

He agrees.

Now guess what happens.

Kuboyasu: A. Falls in love. B. Falls in love. C. Falls in love. D. Steals Kaidou’s things and take off.

You guessed it! It’s A, B, C!

Kuboyasu has never met a guy so...cute? Light? Kaidou was like a flower, dancing in the wind.

From the way his eyes lit up to see a regular looking home to the way he oo’ed and ah’ed and everything Kuboyasu stole had.

It was endearing.

So endearing, Kuboyasu couldn’t help but let Kaidou be for the rest of the night.

Anyway, Kuboyasu isn’t exactly stupid, but he thought he might’ve picked up a sort of...forest spirit?

It wasn’t common knowledge that magic existed, but Kuboyasu has been to places, seen many things, so he thinks Kaidou could be a deity. Kaidou even looks like one. Blue hair, pale skin, red eyes.

It doesn’t register that Kaidou was a prince, because somehow that seemed more unlikely. Somehow.

Maybe he’s a little stupid.

Kuboyasu asks Kaidou if he really is a spirit and Kaidou’s like, “Yeah, yeah, duh!”

So Kuboyasu thinks he’s blessed and decides he’ll stay in the village to just...take care of Kaidou because he thinks that’s his responsibility now.

And remember Kusuo saying he had helpers to keep Kaidou safe? Well said helpers only reinforced the idea that Kaidou could be a spirit because for every trouble he gets into, he somehow always gets out of it by “himself”.

Also, if you’re wondering why Kaidou couldn’t go home yet, I’ll answer that in Kusuo’s side of the story. (I’ll also wrap up the story then, maybe.)

Which I’ll do, later, after I sleep. G’night.

(Basically the whole idea is that; Kuboyasu is trying to be a better person so Kaidou will bless him more, while Kaidou takes advantage of this misunderstanding to learn about the outside world first hand. Slowburn. Maybe.)

[raphael-angele]

Teen Justice AU that I can’t get out of my head

Medieval/Fantasy/Royal AU

(Based off of the game, Princess Isabella 2 and 3)

Roles:

Raven is the prince of Azarath who was raised by the Royal Sorceress and his aunt, Jane Constantine, after Azarath was taken over by Raven’s mom. Raven doesn’t know he’s a prince but knows Jane is his aunt. Raven learns and practices magic from Jane. They live in a forest near a village that is a few kingdoms away from Azarath.

Laurel is the third and youngest princess of Kryptonia, which is a fairy kingdom in the further into the forest. Just like her sisters and mother, she has  limited permission to wander Earth in her human form. She mainly goes to the village near where Raven lives. She actually befriends the prince while she poses as a girl who sells flowers.

Talia is the fifth daughter and the youngest of 6 children of the Queen of Gotham. At the age of 15, Talia was given permission to become a knight. She then became known as The Red Knight since she wears her armor with a red cape/cloak. As a knight, Talia’s main order from her mother is to look after the prince who resides in the village. (Talia is friends with Laurel even before she became a knight. She also knows she’s a fairy).

I don’t know much about the rest of the team, I’m sorry.

Troy is the second prince of the Amazon kingdom. He is trained to use one of the family’s heirlooms(?), which we all already know is the Lasso of Persuasion. He also has basic skills to become a knight. Troy’s older brother (that’s what I’m gonna use) has good relations with the Queen of Gotham so he and Talia also have history.

Jess is a wind spirit. They meet the three of them in the forest when they were under attack by forest beasts. After saving them, they ask what they’re doing there. Talia explains to them that they need to get to a certain someone. Thankfully, Jess knows the area very well. So they shows them the quickest way to get there.

Jacqui is (are you surprised?) a mermaid. After Jess shows them the quickest route, they find that they have to cross a large lake. Raven asks Jess if there’s no way around it. Jess says they’re a lot farther. Appear, Jacqui. Jacqui helps them pass the lake with the water. And since Talia  and Raven can’t walk on water, Laurel uses magic to freeze the water so they can walk on it. Of course, this doesn’t go smoothly and lake beasts attack them. Jacqui comes with them in case they come across another body of water.

Klarienne is who they’re trying to get to...kind of. They’re trying to get to Zatara, AKA Sorcerer Supreme. Klarienne is his protégé. Klarienne and Raven don’t really get along since she doesn’t believe Jane had a nephew. But nonetheless, Klari leads them to Zatara. 

[mika-13]

So, with the help of the wonderful @wandering-horizon, I came up with a Legend of Zelda / Linked Universe AU where every Link is a Zelda species that isn’t Hylian So here’s what I came up with and how it influenced their respective stories

Sky - Rito

When Skyloft was raised above the clouds by Hylia, the Rito were already there

The Rito helped the Hylians get accustomed to life above the clouds and the two species quickly came to rely upon each other

Link is born a Rito and grows up on Skyloft, where things are pretty similar to the original story, he is best friends with Zelda and studies at the academy to become a knight

When Zelda disappears beneath the clouds, he draws the goddess sword and follows her

Things continue on quite the same way as in the game, just with Link wielding the sword with both his "hands" and foot claws, because him flying around and cutting down enemies at the same time is just really neat

He also pecks out one of Ghirahim's eyes at one point because he can

Four - Minish

I've had this headcanon, that the Hero of Men, the one before Four who made the picori blade, was actually a Minish who came through the Minish door (which transformed him into a Hylian for the time) to protect Hyrule

So yeah, basically that

Link is Ezlo's grandson who is also an apprentice with Melari and when Vaati goes rogue he helps his grandfather in defeating him

I imagine him being really confused by being so tall at first and that he still retains some Minish like traits

Time - Kokiri

Link is an actual Kokiri in this, with Navi as his fairy

His life in the Kokiri forrest is pretty peaceful, though Mido still bullies him, because he's best friends with Saria and Mido is jealous, until the Deku Tree calls for him

The Kokiri Emerald allows him to leave the forrest unharmed and so he goes to help Zelda

The rest of the story is pretty much the same, except that he doesn't age when he goes into the future, because he really is an immortal forrest child this time around

Let's just say that Ganondorf is pretty angry about being beaten by a 9 year old

At the start of Majora's Mask when Skullkid steals the ocarina and Epona, he also imprisons Navi in a bottle

Tatl is kind of shocked about that and that plus the fact that she can sense his Kokiri nature result in her trusting and liking Link much sooner

Link manages to free Navi when he gets back his ocarina and from then on it's another adventure, this time not just with his mom but also with his newly acquired older sister Tatl

Twi - Twili

His story is quite different from the one in the game

With him growing up in a completely different world and such

In the beginning he lived a relatively simple life, getting by by doing odd jobs for other people

When Zant staged his coup and started turning helpless Twili into Shadow beasts, Link tried his best to help people escape in time

Zant really didn't like this and sent the beasts after him

Not wanting to fight his people, he ran, stumbling onto the portal to Hyrule

Eventually, Zant caught up to him and tossed him out into the light in the hopes of killing him

Instead of dying, Link is saved by the triforce, which transforms him into a wolf which let's him survive in the world of light

He knows he needs to defeat Zant before the usurper can destroy both Hyrule and the Twilight realm and so he sets out to free Hyrule from the Twilight

The light spirits give him their protection and with the master sword he gains the ability to keep his Twili form even in the light

Of course he also travels with Midna, though he meets her later in the story

Also he obviously knows who Midna is, since the name and the vast amount of magic she possesses is kind of a giveaway

Legend - Zora

He's a sea Zora, so he's different from the rather mean ones in his Hyrule, since their tribes lost contact a long long time ago and he looks more like an ocarina of time Zora

A pink one

He washes up at the beach one day when he's still a tiny little kid and a Hylian man (his uncle in the game) takes him in and raises him

He has to deal with a lot of crap from people because he's Zora and most Zora in his Hyrule just really like spitting fire balls at people

It's also why people don't believe him when he goes out to help Zelda and say he's kidnapped her instead

As for Kohilint, the storm hits him when he's out looking for his family and Marin is also a Zora

He ends up being afraid of storms at sea after that whole debacle and just kind of avoids the ocean after it

Hyrule - Fairy

What can I say, he's the original fairy boy after all

He's not just a regular fairy though, but a very young great fairy, young enough that his usual form isn't that different from a regular fairy

However, he possesses a lot more magic and even has the ability to grow to Hylian size for a time, enabling him to wield sword and shield and fight the various monsters and Ganon

One of the reasons he travels so much is the fear of being bound to a single place once he's grown up, being a great fairy and all and he wants to see all much of the world as possible before that

Wind - Korok

He lives in the forest on outset island and is best friends with Aryll

Once Tetra shows up and Aryll gets kidnapped, he decides he needs to go out and save her

So he asks Aryll's grandma for the sword and shield (grandma is kind of surprised since it's the first time she's ever seen a Korok and she wasn't quite sure Aryll didn't just have an imaginary friend) and sneaks onto Tetra's ship

She discovers him, being able to see him even when he doesn't want to be seen, triforce of wisdom and such, but she's so impressed by him being able to sneak onto her ship that she lets him stay

He has fun with the crew, flying over Nico's obstacle course with Korok magics, and infiltrates the forbidden fortress

From there on it's much like in the original stories though everyone is really surprised and shocked that a usually peaceful forest fairy can wield a sword with such devastation

Needles to say, Ganondorf is even more surprised when he's stabbed in the face this time around

Wars - Gerudo

He's Gerudo, he's trans and he's here to end Ganon's whole career

He isn't a Hylian soldier in this but a Gerudo warrior and the first part of the war takes part without him

Which also means that it isn't going too well for the Hylian forces and Ganon revives way faster

The Gerudo haven't dealt much with the rest of Hyrule for many decades, but they take the return of Ganon in the form of a Gerudo as a personal insult and immediately join the war, turning the tide, especially with War's proving himself to be an unrivaled warrior as well as the hero

Wild - Sheikah

With all the Sheikah tech in his game it only makes sense

Before the calamity, he was Zelda's personal bodyguard, the way Sheikah often are for the royal family

Him and Zelda got along pretty well, having known each other for a long time, but they sort of drift apart once he draws the master sword, as Zelda envies him for his easy his destiny came to him, and he kind of struggles with the burden of the whole world, as his life was kind of all laid out for him before the master sword

Once the calamity strikes everything goes pretty much the same way, but his interactive with the yiga clan are way more intense this time around, because he's a Sheikah as well as the hero

So yeah, there you have it, my personal Zelda AU

I hope you like it

[merrymorningofmay]

ok so i saw tgk for the second time and am now ready to give a Take on it so here it goes: to me it’s a movie about humanity and how much of a stranger the world is to it

like there are these humans living their lives, doing their silly little conquests against the saxons, cutting down forests, feeling pretty good about themselves. then the Other (and he is an Other here and not just an enchanted human dude like in the poem) comes in and says, you may do whatever you want to me. the human, of course, proceeds to majorly disfigure the Other, cheered on by his fellows and feeling nothing. even knowing that it will bite him in the ass in the very forseeable future. sure reminds me of nothing that humanity does irl. ahem

but then the human has to face the Other again, this time without the safety of human company or human conventions. and the rest of the humans say, you got this! according to our worldview, you will either gain some good ol’ clout out of this, or just. well. you should, okay. that’s how things are done. that's how we do things

(side note about the humans: i know the director has said that the movie is about christianity vs. paganism and all that, buuuut to me it doesn’t feel that way somehow? the christian arthur destroys the Otherness and the pagan morgana uses it to achieve her goals, so ultimately they both want to control it, and both fail, since arthur’s reign is already declining and morgana’s magic never saves gawain, neither from the green dude nor the robbers)

so anyway the human leaves the comfort zone of, well, humanity, and it immediately turns out that outside of that comfort zone he has 0 control over anything, because the world, you see, is full of Weird Shit. no, gawain, you may not know what you get if you dive into the lake. unclear what that giant lady was gonna do to you but you better be glad the fox intervened. man, there are sure lots of odd things in this castle (and who lives there but the worst creeps of all, the bi people! ugh). you can’t even navigate your interactions with other humans: the guy you’ve just had a seemingly safe conversation with is now attacking you. gawain rides out in full armour, with all the supplies, all good and ready, but as soon as he leaves the castle everything is taken from him, and he can only use what tools/help the Otherness decides to randomly provide: the magically returned axe, the boat, the fox guardian, the horse (in the vision/delusion), maybe the whole hautdesert castle? who knows. gawain can basically only follow whatever instructions he’s given and hope for the best, while the Otherness is strange, incomprehensible or at least unpredictable, and way, way more powerful.

(which incidentally! brings us to none other than my personal good pal jrr tolkien who famously translated the poem, since the human habit to dominate and control the rest of the creation was a thing he was very much preoccupied with, and if you’ve read “on fairy-stories” you know that fantasy for him was a tool to disturb our “lazy ownership” of the world and make us wonder at it as something strange and independent from us. which is also, i argue, what the movie does by being both horror-ish and VERY beautiful)

anyhow, gawain keeps on with his journey through the Other, motivated by the human notions of, uhh, honor? vanity? self-actualization? clear conscience, let’s say. when in the end he sees a vision of his life, it’s a vision of him having control and misusing it, betraying and destroying the weaker other (essel, his people, his son), while everything that he does presumably value (his wife, mother, glory) still ends up drifting away. when gawain throws away the girdle, he gives up trying to bend the situation to his will - gives up that control which humans constantly seek and feel entitled to - but, again, he does so out of his human need for clear conscience (and the one who’s urging gawain to disregard this need in the movie is not a human servant but the fox). gawain’s moral victory is him overcoming the human flaw while upholding the human virtue before the face of the Other. and that actually complements the poem nicely, since the poem is also about gawain realizing the limit of his power as a human: he wasn’t led astray by lust or greed, but could not resist the basic will to survive. both the poem and the movie say, "you’re just a human, so be humble,” but i feel like the movie, framing gawain’s ending as a triumph, also says, “it’s worth to be human even if there is nothing human around to reward you for it”

which, i think. is neat

[honourablejester]

Again, browsing back through my original stories and attempting to catalogue them. This is arranged by … mood, maybe, more than genre? Things of a similar feel, let’s say:

Fairytales:

With a Faerie Wild and Wary – fairytale. In a strange, otherworldly forest, a mischievous young woman meets a much more wary fairy

A Silent Companionship – fairytale. The story of a little river gnome and the much more grim and dangerous fey knight that she accidentally adopted

Autumn Fairytale – fairytale. A little family history about a grandmother who courted a lady elf knight in her youth, mostly with food

Cursed Blessings – fantasy. Basically what would result if, during the ‘fairy blessing’ scene from Sleeping Beauty, the fairies got a bit confused on the gender of the pair of children in question and gave them the ‘wrong’ stereotypical gifts

The Rain Witch – urban fantasy/fairytale. An exhausted and tearful young woman has a little breakdown in a rainy park, and then a witch happens

Dark Fantasy Westerns:

(This is a weirdly specific subgenre for me to have multiples of, but it’s a type of a mood?)

Angel Killer – dark fantasy western. You ever heard tell of the hunter with the angelbone knife?

Mr Shadow & Mr Sweet – um. Religious fantasy? Strongly inspired by Terry Brooks’ ‘Knight of the Word’ series. In a strange desert purgatory, an angel and his dark companion find a young woman in need of help reaching the light (or, well, a bus)

The Demon-Eater – mythological western? A young woman with a hole in her soul gets possessed by a demon and sets about eating it, only to be counselled/rescued by the little god in the thorns

Into Whitewood – fantasy western. A magess investigating a potential evil in a small town meets an odd old woman who knows more than she should

Scales Uneven and Balance Skewed – vaguely horror-western in which a tired hunter retires to a Badlands town and almost doesn’t notice that the town doctor is an equally tired monster

Science Fiction:

The Long Dark – old-school soft science fiction. Scouting for an exiled cityship along the galaxy’s edge, the crew of the crystal aethership Voidsong encounter a strange installation

Talaris – greek mythology meets science fiction. Hermes and Helios stand on a space station and discuss humanity’s first FTL mission beyond the bounds of what even they know

Historical Fantasy:

(historically inspired, really, not actually historical in any even approaching accurate way)

Castles in the Sky – dieselpunk fantasy fairytale. Two exiled fairy lovers stand in a world of iron and airships, fearing that the advent of a second world war will drive them back into the mists from which they came

The Statue – historical fantasy/romance. A bereaved and lonely regency-ish young lord fantasises rather vividly about the sphinx statue at the bottom of his garden

A Thief’s Challenge – historical fantasy. A semi-retired queen of thieves wants some comfort in her old age and so sets a challenge for her hand in marriage. Her oldest friend is first shocked, and then alarmingly enthusiastic …

The Rose Knight – vaguely French historical fantasy. A tired provincial nobleman in need of help comes to the capital to meet a famous spiritualist and champion, and comes within inches of royally botching the interview

Fraternity of the Maimed – sort of Victorian-esque urban fantasy. A woman being persecuted by an aristocratic vampire gets stashed with a manor house full of werewolves for safe keeping

High Fantasy:

Passing Through – fantasy. Roving mercenary Haleth gets chased into a haunted forest by an angry lordling, and meets a poor bastard even worse off than her along the way

Heartwood – high fantasy. A mercenary and her elven lover escort some diplomats to the edge of the wyrldwood, the border with chaos, and then said elven lover reveals some things about himself that he should probably have mentioned previously

Logistically Complicated – vaguely African-inspired fantasy meets a reverse Beauty & the Beast. The beautiful scholar prince of a conquered country is given in marriage to the monstrous warrior queen of their conquerors, and does his best to make the best of it

The Kingfisher – irish mythological fantasy. A dreamer awakes in the Otherworld, and gets some advice from Manannan Mac Lir on how to survive

Fantasy Humour:

Manners Saveth Man – fairytale fantasy humour. Just a sorceress and her dragoness friend ranting about the idiocy of ‘heroes’ who keep interrupting delicate and occasionally apocalyptic workings

The Witch Run of Gethryck – Pratchett-esque fantasy. The story of the annual witch run of a vaguely welsh-inspired province, and all the sordid gossip that generally arises from it

Lessons in Invocation – tiny fantasy fragment, on the subject of silence in the library and why it’s especially vital in a magical library

Urban Fantasy & Noir:

(again, it’s a consistent mood for me, shows up a fair bit)

Black Moon Blood – cosmic horror/urban fantasy. A vaguely cold-war era pair, a vampire and a distinctly off scientist, take out an installation of moon slugs for an occult organisation

Long Nights and Lord Save Us – urban fantasy. A team of modern monster hunters on a case, and then a little bit of backstory on the demon funhouse.

La Nuit – dark superhero noir/cosmic horror. A pair of small stories from the life of Etta James, a WWII ambulance driver who survived a hole in the world and the emergence of the Capes, ‘superheroes’ who range from the typical to the utterly lovecraftian

Night Shift – urban fantasy/superheroes/noir. A morgue cleaner goes missing, and the revenant she helped once gets a band of dark superheroes together to find her again

Welcome to Carogne – Redwall-ish animal dark fantasy. Various fragments following a blind doctor with a lot of secrets through the horrific criminal underworld of a city of rats

Cityside Fairytale – Dark little urban fantasy noir in which, mob boss or not, it is extremely inadvisable to piss off naiads when you live in a riverside city

Misc Genres:

(I love these, but they tend not to match much else I’ve done)

Loved Not Wisely – fantasy/tragedy/soulmate. A pair of soulmates reincarnate over and over again under a curse to destroy each other in each life unless they renounce their love, and have so far defiantly refused

A Reaper Come Lately – ghostly romance. An old woman dies, and finds her husband waiting to joyfully continue all their many arguments over the years

The Interrogator – cold war-ish dystopian fiction. A monologue on justice and mercy from an ‘interrogator’ for a fallen regime as he awaits execution

… I’ve had a few odd notions over the years, you know that?

[treegourds]

Triforce Flip AU: I’ve been sitting on this AU for a while and am finally happy enough with where I am to post about it! 

The flip is between Zelda and Ganondorf, so Zelda wields Power, and Ganon wields Wisdom. Link still has Courage. 

If you wanna read more about the specifics about it, there’s some basic info under the cut!

TL;DR: Ganondorf is the wielder of Wisdom, the future Chief of the Gerudo, and is currently heading towards the Lost Woods. Zelda is the wielder of Power and leads the Sheikah Resistance Forces against her corrupt father. Their soldiers believe Zelda to have the Triforce of Wisdom and Impa to have Courage. Link is a town guard and the true weilder of Courage. They only person who knows this is Sheik, who he has not seen since his reveal. Link is heading towards the Lost Woods. Zelda’s whereabouts are unknown. Everyone is trans.

Ganondorf (he/him): Ganondorf is a little closed off and overdramatic, but his tactical skills make him indispensable when it comes to expeditions out into the desert. He is the first voe born in a thousand years, but he is the only self-made gerudo voe in recorded history. This greatly confused the rest of the town, but they vowed to support one of their own and helped him transition through a combination of magic and medicine. His mother, the town jeweler, is especially proud of him and crafted his headpiece in the style of Gerudo voe of the past. Even though he has the right to rule as a voe, the Chief, his aunt, is convinced that his transition is a plot for his mother to become chief. As such, he was not crowned chief. This doesn’t phase Ganon too much, though, and he continues to work to better his community any way he can without the official role of chief. Overtime, the town comes around and the people of the village see him as the rightful ruler and follow him into battle without complaint. He is kind and devoted to them all, seeing no soldier better than him, and his calculating nature leads to effective expeditions with little loss of life. 

Throughout Hyrule, the frequency of monster attacks had been increasing, coming to a climax in Gerudo valley one cold night. That night, in order to protect his mother and aunt, Ganon unlocked his sealing powers. Any doubt surrounding his right to rule was squashed when it’s revealed he has Hylia’s Wisdom. Both out of thanks and newfound trust, the Chief offered Ganondorf the thrown. He thanked her, but turned down the offer for the time being, claiming he felt a call north to the Lost Woods and felt he would find a way to bring peace to the land there.

Zelda (she/they): Zelda’s father, the King, has been on the defense for years, fighting the increasingly frequent monster attacks throughout his kingdom. The King becomes more agitated as time goes on, the pressure getting to him. This soon came to a climax when his family is attacked while he is out in the field. Zelda’s mother and only brother were both killed in the attack. The King blames the Sheikah for what he sees as their failure and betrayal to the royal family, since they were the only ones who knew of the castle’s weakened state. In truth, it is an unfortunate set of circumstances, but that does not stop the king from betraying the Sheikah and running them out of the castle. 

Zelda had been on rocky terms with their father for years. He blamed Zelda for not unlocking her sealing powers, seeing them as the ultimate solution for the monster attacks. When Zelda hears about the rampage her father is causing within the castle, they convince Impa, their personal aid and a mother figure, to stay behind and try to talk to Zelda’s father. When they do all meet up, it’s no use. The King is passed convincing, and he sees Zelda as another traitor to the crown, ordering his guards to attack. Fearing what would happen to them, Zelda closes their wishes to be able to escape with Impa unscathed. When she opens her eyes, the guards and the King are all frozen solid, and the two are able to make their escape. To their horror, Zelda has unlocked magic powers associated with the Triforce of Power.

After the escape, Impa and Zelda meet up with the escaped Sheikah and defected Hylian soldiers. They created the Sheikah Resistance Forces, which aim to overthrow the corrupt King and put Zelda on the thrown. Zelda grows up to be cold and isolated, rarely smiling, but still showing kindness to those around her. The soldiers are convinced that Zelda has finally unlocked the powers of Wisdom, and Zelda is too scared to correct them. Still, Zelda is convinced that the Resistance needs two pieces of the Triforce to successfully overthrow her father. Impa eventually reveals to Zelda that she has Courage, despite never using any of its ability. Still, Impa has no reason to lie, so when Zelda is old enough to lead, they come out of hiding and start their attack.

Zelda will meet Link (see Link section) while presenting as Sheik, and is feircely protective of him. Demise, taking physical form, will try and convince Zelda to give in to their “true power,” claiming that with it, no one else would have to die and Link could have the quiet life he wants. Zelda is not convinced to give in until [REDACTED].

Link (he/him): When Link was young, his village was attacked by the King’s forces, looking to find any Resistance forces. In the attack, his parents are killed, and Link escaped into the forest with his baby sister in his arms. Even though they escaped the King’s forces, Link runs straight into a Lizalfos camp. He stood his ground as long as he could, but he was no match against all of them. His final wish is to find the strength to protect his sister, and he unlocks Courage. With his wish, he is able to beat the monsters and escape to his grandparent’s village, where he has lived since. Link tells no one of the emergence of his powers, afraid he’d be pulled into the war. Another thing he tells no one is the blessing of the local Great Fairy he received, allowing him to magically transition.

Link loves the people of his new village, but is devastated by the guilt of unlocking his powers too late to save his parents. Determined to never allow this to happen again, Link guards the entrance to the village every night. His sister worries for him, but can do nothing to convince him to leave his post. Link sleeps very little, resting when behind the counter at his grandparents’ store or when behind his pottery wheel (yes, he’s a potter). The nights get easier when a stranger by the name of Sheik (he/they) starts appearing besides him. They often bring his harp, playing for Link. The two become very close, and Link trusts Sheik enough to be able to sleep at night as Sheik guards the village. One night, the two are ambushed and Link is forced to use his powers to save Sheik. Sheik is amazed, confused, and fearful for Link, making him promise to never reveal his powers to anyone. When Link agrees, Sheik gifts Link Din’s Protection, then leaves. They have not seen each other since.

Link has been more on edge since the attack, and more people are on guard at night. One night, Hylia reaches out to him, calling him to go to the Lost Woods, where he will meet another part of his soul. 

If you’ve got any questions, feel free to shoot them my way! I’d love to talk about them!

[legendcrown]

considering just how long ralsei was left waiting in castletown, it’s maybe not so surprising that the area became so heavily imbued with his magic. this effect was only amplified by the near by presence of the dark fountain, and the prince’s family ties to said shadowy geyser. ralsei’s castle has become somewhat of a extension of himself, and it definitely shows, both magically and otherwise/in spirit, so! tl;dr, under the cut will be hcs related to the castle itself, the goings on inside, etc etc.

>to start this out i wanna explain a lil more abt how his soul magic/‘imagination’ magic works. basically, as i mentioned in this hc, ralsei’s soul magic isn’t like he can just, think of s/t crazy, and make it happen. it’s more a passive thing, powered by his own belief/hope/wonder he finds in the world around him. >and, bc ralsei doesn’t. realize that he’s the one affecting/creating these things, there is a sense of randomness to the castle. he never knows what to expect, but he doesn’t consider that a bad thing, he finds enjoyment in the thrill of adventure, after all! and, tbh; thats kinda why its Like That™ in the 1st place? it’s a subconscious attempt @ staving off the effects of prolong -ed isolation, a makeshift fix for an abandoned childs boredom/loneliness. >(this is also why hes able to find his way around the castle with ease despite it’s mixed up nature.)

>the castle seems impossibly bigger on the inside, ofc the outer shell is a looming figure in of itself, bc, well. it’s a castle. however the point still stands, bc the inside almost seems never-ending, and ever-changing, at that, bc… >his magic changes a lot the castle’s interior itself, randomly creating new, strange rooms to explore, most of which don’t even seem possible. these rooms vary in size, from smaller, more cramped spaces, to places bigger then a football field, the contents inside can be anything, rlly!–

>from a dark forest that honest to god makes you feel like you’re outside, though you know you can’t possibly be. w/ fanged plants and pretty crystals twinkling much like fairy lights, w/ tree swings that hang impossibly from above. >to a room completely made out of patchwork and knitted yarn, w/ weird art stuffs and childish looking statues, and a small pond made of water colors, the rocks/lily pads to jump across are instead, large colorful buttons.

>there’s more minor oddities too, such as: staircases that don’t make sense/seem to move every so often, meaning sometimes you end up upside down or walking down sideways on a wall.   >new doors and hallways that definitely didn’t exist a moment before/pop up out of nowhere, a number of secret passages and tunnels to use as shortcuts. >random puzzle areas and maze-like sections scatter -ed around the place, similar to the ruins in UT, etc etc!

>another layer of the what/how @ his castle, is the fact the general vibe of the place is also effected heavily by rals’ own mental/emotional state. >meaning, say he’s having a Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day, the place will. be a lot less lively then usual, not as bright/with colors dulled, colder somehow, etc etc. >and, if the opposite is true, if he’s instead, doing alright/feeling happy/excited, the castle be as it normally is, lively and colorful and forever in motion, filled with song/general goings on, warm in that homey/cozy sorta way, etc etc. >there’s ofc, lots of states inbetween, but! y'get the idea.

>tho, there’s some things that aren’t so magically inclined, like how a lot of the castle runs on a series of weird rube goldberg type machines, built by ralsei himself. bc. even w/ all the free time in the world, upkeep for an entire magical castle + the dark fountain itself is a lot for just one (1) lil prince! >so, hes went and automated a lot of the more repetitive work to help lighten the load. while they’re kinda arts and crafts looking, lots of popsicle sticks and glitter glue; they’re still surprisingly complicated and generally pretty reliable.

>as well, any rooms usually left untouched by the daily magical shifts (certain hallways, the main entrance, rals’ room, the library, the kitchen, etc etc) are us -ually covered in other cutesy decorations, glitter/confetti and stickers, etc etc. >some of the inanimate objects in ralsei’s castle are ‘alive’ albeit in a subdued sense, they’re able to move/react, mostly. empty suits of knights armor, stuff in the kitchen, statues, paintings, bookcases, clocks, doors. not everything in the castle, of course. but again, y’get the idea, i think!

>all this aside tho, the v highest floors and parts of the roof of the castle are burnt from the knight’s attack, and so those floors are the few areas not messed w/ in any way. >which is partly bc he doesn’t wanna be up there, considering; oof, but also bc its where the dark fountain is situated. anything below those top floors is game, tho.

>so, yeah! 2 wrap this up: ralsei, ofc, has some seriously bad memories tied to his castle, and thats. rlly part of the reason his magic has settled so heavily into its bricks, tbh. he doesn’t want castle town to be something he fears, or something he solely associates with those bad events. it was his + his families home, and he still considers it such, even after everything. >he doesn’t want it to be something that just. makes him sad™, so all the stuff w/ the castle, the ever changing layout, how it became a home to the strange creatures that fill the halls, the childish display of candy colors and clashing designs, is basically just. a type of stubbornity?

>tl;dr it’s him looking at the ruins of a castle he no longer knew, and digging his heels in, making it so it’s not just another thing the knight took from him, etc etc.

[bittybattybunny]

I'm late!! but yeah umm can you pls give a bit more context on that au were hattie and bow eat fairy food cause of Craft?

Sure can!!

So this au spawned cuz @doodleimprovement was working on their Fae au which is big love and it made me wanna do fae things so I asked for a suggestion and she suggested spiriting away (cuz a running joke i have is Victorian AU offbrand Eclipse tries to spirit the kiddos off cuz she’s fae and likes the kiddos)

And i realized i could use a modified “what if” VA Eclipse’s backstory where she was taken by fae herself as a child (she’s half fae naturally so it was easy to get her) so she has a lot of pent up issues with spiriting away.

So in this au, basically Craft was being a chaos agent and tricked two human children into eating fae food while on the other side of the veil, thus locking them there. Eclipse caught this but it was too late. Instead of leaving the girls to fend for themselves she instead decided she’d watch over them so they’d not suffer as she did. (She was taken when she roughly 6ish and had no one at her side so she was left to fend for herself with only her own latent magic. this leads to her actually being an incredibly powerful fae but she’s not aware of her parentage. Her fae mother is Tatiana.)

Meanwhile the girl’s father, a novelist, is looking everywhere for them. He ends up in the woods per tip from someone in town that they saw the girls with a strange black haired teenager (this was Craft shapeshifting) and they went to the Horizon woods. there he’s trying to find them but he can’t. He actually starts to suffer from an Asthma attack from his running and his panic. Eclipse steps in to ease his suffering as she’s able to make herself visible to humans.

She takes him to a mushroom circle to bring him to the other side and as long as she holds his hand he sees the girls but the moment she lets go he no longer can. because they are more fae than human and have no magic yet they can’t be seen without the sight even if they are in the fairy veil.

They end up discussing options and none of them are great. basically if he tries to be spirited away he risks dying due to his age, he refuses to abandon his girls. So they end up deciding that until they find a way to bring the taken back she’ll have to go with them so he can see the girls.

This often leads to bickering as she HAS to hold his hand for it to work, the two have different views on parenting (she has a very strict idea on it due to her upbringing as a Duke’s daughter; he’s a bit more lax) and if shes annoyed she’ll let go and just vanish from sight. but normally the girls will chide her until she apologizes or if he was the one in wrong he apologizes.

Slowly the two of them get closer and because she’s near him so often her magic does rub off and she’s not needed for him to see his daughters, and eventually because they have the limited contact with the fairy veil they slowly get human again to his delight.

She doesn’t realize how close she got to them so when they are fully visible again she realizes “oh. I’m not needed anymore.” since their deal was she’d stick around until they fixed the girls.

What she doesn’t realize is the weird feeling in her chest she gets with the novelist is love, nor does she realize he’s fallen equally in love with her over the time they spent together, so when he wakes up and can’t find her he panics.

When she’s back in the woods she can’t get herself to stop crying. She doesn’t understand why it hurts so much more than when she herself was taken.

It’s not until she hears him shouting her name. Panting and wheezing and looking for her in the dead of night, his hair a mess of curls, glasses on crooked, shirt wrinkled and he just looks distressed.

It’s then she realizes why she feels so terrible and ends up running to him and the two embrace. its there they end up kissing and he accidentally swallows some of her blood (when she was crying she’d been chewing her lip) which forms a formal bond between them, allowing her to fully leave the woods and live with humans without worry again.

Meanwhile Craft watched this and just grins before vanishing back into the veil. as the whole reason they picked those two girls, is they had a feeling they could finally help the woman get out of the woods that played a mean trick on a frightened child.

Because the title “taken and alone” is not in reference to hat and bow but Eclipse herself. The whole reason the woods took her was because she was being hunted by the man who murdered her father and was trying to kill her. She just was trying to live and the forest saw her untapped magic and took her. It kept her isolated for a long time before exposing her to other fae. Craft saw this but was unable to help her and being a fae themself they weren’t sure how to help a half human. thus they concocted the idea a human had to be the one to pull her back to the otherside. So they found a human who was very full of love and stubborn, found a way to make him go to the woods, give him a reason to stay with Eclipse and know her and get attached, and hopefully he’d save her.

The whole thing was a shot in the dark Craft was trying to save her. thats why they were saying “understand--” but Eclipse was very angry for a good reason.

So long short, Craft wanted to save Eclipse who’s been trapped by a fae woods to try and become a good magic source despite shes half human so he tricked a couple of kids into getting taken because he needed their father in order to try and give her a tether to the human world because shes been in the woods for 300 years and anyone who knew her on the human side are dead.

[slashingdisneypasta]

Hello! Can I request a headcanon where the queen of hearts (1951), Maleficent, Cruella, Shang yu and Yzma (separated) take care of a lost (orphaned) little girl (like 5-6) and adopted her as their own. Thank!

These were sooooo fun to think of, omg XD I feel all warm inside, thanks for the request! I hope you like it as much as I do ^^

~~~

Cruella DeVille (You can imagine either animated, OUAT or live action Cruella, but I liked this gif ^^):

·         Cruella, is more of a… fun, rich aunt. You know, when you can post the child back to its parents any time you like with a sugar high and new Xbox?

·         But, as the capable entrepreneur and businesswoman that she is, she rises to the challenge of ‘parenting’, when the stinky orphaned girl living on the streets (You, obviously) show potential in the fashion industry.

·         She takes you right to the adoption agency, picks you up and plops you on the counter like a pair of shoes and asks how much you cost. You just smile sweetly, like the most adorable munchkin ever despite the off way your new caregiver handles you, and the agent has some reservations, of course, but Cruella’s able to speed up the adoption process with her connections and her money.

·         Your relationship at first is similar to Oswald Cobblepot and Martin’s. And if you haven’t watched Gotham, I’ll explain; Sort of distant, but the adult is trying at least. They’re just not used to having a pre-teen around. And, somehow, they’re making the child feel more understood and taken care of then anyone else ever has, despite both parties’ reservations.

·         Slowly you bond (Over fashion, obviously) and Cruella turns into, honestly, a pretty good mum (For a villain who wants to kidnap puppies from her friend and make a coat for herself out of them, anyway). She learns to not gag when your shows are on the telly, she takes more time off work to take care of you and turn up to your school things (Like parent-teacher interviews, concerts, art exhibitions, and assemblies if you’re going to get an award- she even makes artful collages out of your work on the fridge), and you two even learn how to cook some easy dinners together.

·         (Cruella can cook, I think, but I can imagine they’re more fancy stuff that a kid really isn’t interested in)

·         You’re a two-person team kind of family.

·         She doesn’t like you to be around Jasper and Horace because their stupidity and lack of fashion sense could be contagious.

·         For the longest time, you just call her Cruella… until one day she says she loves you (Which is visibly difficult for her. Not because the words aren’t true, but because she’s not sentimental) and you finally call her ‘Mum’.

Maleficent:

·         You start following her around, lost and having decide the scary green lady with a cute bird pet is the one to go to for help. She tries to scare you off, but of course you’re already scared anyway! But not of her- of being left alone.

·         So you keep following her through the forest, until you reach her castle and Diablo has become attached to you and is sitting on your shoulder instead of hers, nuzzling your little face.

·         She leaves out some food for you for dinner and lays a clean blanket down on an abandoned bed in a random room down a dark hallway. It’s a spooky night, in that creepy castle… but the blanket smells like grass and you find that if you close your eyes and smoosh your face into it, you don’t think about the things that could be hidden in the dark. Also, Diablo comes in and keeps you company.

·         Mal is sure that you’ll be gone the next day. That’s why she was so kind. She was sure you were just a determined straggler and if she offered you a home for a night, then you would be the fickle little child that you are leave without so much as a thank you the next day.

·         But you don’t leave.

·         And you do say thank you, and even make her a mud pie outside the castle.

·         She gives you a bit of a smile (Not soft, because Mal is still an evil fairy, but it’s a refreshing look on a face that had been pinched the whole time), resigning to you. You’re all alone like her. Maybe it won’t hurt so much to let you stay.

·         Okay, as a parent, Mal isn’t so bad. She settles into the pace easier than Cruella or Yzma, at least, and her lifestyle allows for a far stabler childhood for you then Shan Yu’s. Plus, she’s outwardly very calm, which is a huge improvement from if you were living under the Red Queens roof.

·         Distracts you with magic when she’s busy or just when she wants to watch the awe in your face as you watch sparkles dance around the room like real life stars.

·         Keeps you away from all her villainy- you don’t need to be messed up in all that. Basically no one except her crow knows you exist and she’d like to keep it that way.

Shan Yu:

·         Shan Yu finds you after he pillages your village (And you’re the only survivor) and you followed along behind his men for a while until they noticed you. Which didn’t take long, of course, they’re a group of highly skilled Huns in the ways of hunting and warfare.

·         He uses his noggin (A very good noggin. Much cleverness) and identifies the favourable factors to having a little girl with them. You’re unassuming, for one, and can be trained (And moulded) to be used as a diversion for them in the kind of situations in which brute force do not apply and wouldn’t be helpful.

·         He also acknowledges the need to train the next generation into their image to continue the Huns control over China even after he passes away. So, off on the quest to take over China you go, with them.

·         He is so big, that you can perch on his wide shoulder and he’ll be fine still marching along.

·         He gets a bit soft when interacting with you. At least, he certainly doesn’t treat you like an adult because you of course aren’t one. He encourages your childish wonder and your playing around. He’ll even play eye spy with you as you travel, or play a little tug of war if you get a piece of fabric or rope (Yes, like a puppy) and he’s just sitting down chilling somewhere on a rest break or at camp, pretending that the game is actually a contest until he smirks and tugs just a tiny bit harder and you fall forward onto your face XD (He only uses one hand the entire time)

·         He’s a really chill dad, really, despite the whole… killing everyone in your village… First impressions, amiright? XD

·         The rest of his men either hate you with every fibre of their huge beings or love you even more, and that’s the tea. One of them once rolled you up in a blanket and strapped you to a horse so you would stop annoying them by running around in front of the mules. You decide whether this was one who hated you or loved you. (Another came along and put a roll of bread in your mouth so you could eat, but didn’t release you)

·         You’ve also been tied (Safely and comfortably, yes but still tied with your feet off the ground) to a tree as a time out and dropped in lakes (Once they knew you could swim) to calm your shit when you got hyper.

·         You sleep in Shan Yu’s tent until you’re like 14 and declares that you’re able to defend yourself and can kill a man, so he can keep you safe.

Queen of Hearts:

·         Goodness, who let this woman adopt? (Well, I mean, no-one could stop her) Even Hades would be better, and he tried to have a baby assassinated.

·         This woman would be unintentionally manipulative towards this child (Like Norma and Norman Bates. Jesus christ). Whenever the kid doesn’t do anything that she wants them to, she’ll get p i s s e d, and that might legitimately mess with the kids psyche. She won’t behead the lil girl, of course, which I guess is bit of a saving grace (she isn’t that cruel) here? But it’s definitely a good thing the gentle King of Hearts is around, to settle the flames and calm down his wife and new daughter when games go awry.

·         (And ya’ll play lots of games. Some of the time, living with her and her husband as your parental figures is a dream for a little girl like you)

·         She does try her very hardest to be kind and not to lose her temper, and it is made so much easier by the fact that you’re an innocent little girl (Younger than Alice was), and she’s very fond of you. So, in a way, adopting you is helping her with her issues, and by extension, helping the rest of Wonderland.

·         You get a big fancy throne-like highchair at the royal dinner table.

·         Your little family is a bit or very messy, but you are never not loved. You always know that you’re loved.

Yzma:

·         When Yzma takes you in, its because Kronk discovered your little form sleeping in an alleyway and ran with you in his hands back to her, and BEGGED her. This sweetheart (Kronk, not Yzma) could not handle the knowledge that a little baby girl was abandoned and all alone on the streets. And Yzma’s the most well-off, influential person he knows! Of course he’s going to go to her for help.

·         When she finally gives in, its because you called her pretty. She’s just like… pause… “Seems like an intelligent enough… eugh… child... Kronk come! We have to disinfect it.”

·         Kronk rushes after Yzma, still holding you and clarifies for you: “She means a bath.”

·         So, now, you have your protective, psycho, affection-challenged mother and your sweet, dumb, beloved… uncle. Yeah, uncle. We’ll go with uncle.

·         Yzma takes a while to get used to you, and she’s very defiant against getting called ‘Mum’ or ‘Mother’ (Mama or Mummy have a more youthful feel, according to Yzma.), but she’s pretty immature due to her psychosis so she tends to blend well with your child personality.

·         You laugh so much, with her. Most of the things she says are hilarious, especially when she’s exasperated and mutters about Kronk.

·         She doesn’t want you to grow up without a brain like him (Or to mix with other children- she will not be dealing with chicken pox or nits. If you did get either of those things, she would be living in a full-on hazmat suit and spray everything you touch, and you. Kronk would end up getting the sickness because he gives you lots of hugs and takes care of you while you’re sick or you have the nits) so she gets you a home school teacher.

·         On your birthday (They do the day Kronk found you if you don’t know it), Kronk wakes Yzma up at the buttcrack of dawn drags her along to set up the day for you. Including a treasure hunt, where its clear that Yzma wrote the clues because its very translucent through the sentences she wrote that she didn’t have coffee before writing them. Very bitter.

·         She does want to make you happy though and buys you literally the best present for a child of that time. I don’t know what it is, but it’s the equivalent for them of a little car or coloured TV (Like the Barbie or Hot Wheel ones) for us. She’s so smug about it, too, like ‘Shove that up your 4 layer cake with different flavours, Kronk.’.