#it is insane how much he's like satan just thinking about it now im kind of... >.>

[darlingdaisyfarm]

A thought I’d like to share:

Imagine Ford proposing to you except it’s young/pre portal! Ford.

He takes you out to a nice restaurant and the poor dude can’t relax, like all. He’s bright red and keeps fidgeting with the ring box in his pocket, meanwhile you’re just staring at him from across the table with a concerned look and keep asking him if he’s okay. Poor guy can’t even think straight, seeing you in a stunning outfit that he definitely picked out for you, and all he can think about is making you his spouse and kissing you silly.

Eventually when he does propose it starts as something science-y and profound (he wrote it down and practiced) but the poor guy ends up tripping over his words and ends up just blurting out the question. Once you say yes he gives you the deepest most passionate kiss he can muster until you’re dam near seeing stars.

After dinner is done he scoops you up the second you get out of the restaurant and takes you back to his car where he once again kisses you silly. The wedding is supposed to be scheduled after the portals completion but it never happens for obvious reasons, except once he gets back and post weirdmageddon you two reconnect again, somehow, and he finds out you kept the ring he gave you. The ring, by the way, is made of some crazy alien material but it’s like..crazy beautiful and also matches your eyes. Anyways cue wedding organized by Mabel and your two of you finally get your happy ending.

I know this is long and crazy tooth rotting fluff but I want to kiss him so bad it’s insane

(P.s-I feel like Stan would be the type to either say “you’re my wife/husband/spouse now” with no further explanation OR also stumble over his words similarly to when he tried to flirt with Lazy Susan)

Also I read your most recent post about having a Stan fic in the works and the first time I read it I misread “Stan” as “Satan” and just accepted it

aaAAA YES YES YES im gonna cry because i too want to kiss him so bad it’s kind of ruining my life

everything is sfw here but ill anyways hide it because i talked too much, sorry i just love it

first of all, Ford and Dipper making “plan lists” with bullet points like “ask them about their day” and “don’t forget eye contact” is SOOO real. “ah yes! rehearse my conversations like they’re mission briefings”, the clipboard is shaking in his hand, Ford is clearing his throat every two seconds trying not to look like a nerd and failing miserably

and you just sit there smiling because you know, you always know, you’ve seen him like this before, all flustered and over-calculating and cute as hell, and every time it just makes you wanna grab his face and kiss his stupid genius forehead

yes, this man definitely planned everything. Ford reserved the restaurant three weeks in advance. he absolutely picked the outfit for you, “as a surprise!”, “i saw this in a shop window and thought it might be. . . flattering to your uh, body?,” meanwhile he’s been daydreaming about how you’d look in it for weeks. Ford nearly passes out when when you wear it, walking out of the room

he keeps checking his pocket every second, afraid the ring's gonna mysteriously disappear. god, he had a speech, a beautiful, sprawling, poetic thing about quantum entanglement and soul mates and probability curves and how the odds of finding someone like you were incalculably rare. and he practiced it in the mirror. but none of it makes sense or works when he’s there across from you, trying not to let the little velvet box burn a hole in his pocket

you ask “are you okay, sweetheart?” and Ford wants to run away because he's literally dying from anxiety. Ford needs a shower, more than one, even if he despises them. he’s sweating, knees weak and all his academic vocabulary just vanishes. and he blurts it out finally, “will you marry me— i mean, i want you to—uh, i have a whole speech! just, wait, n-no, say yes first??”

you barely let him finish, saying “yes Ford oh my god of course i will marry you” although you're no better than him, almost choking on your saliva from excitement and happiness. ohhh the kiss, the KISS that follows, Stanford surges over the table, turning off his ever-working brain for the first time in so long. hands trembling, glasses askew, but it’s all feeling, finally letting himself have what he’s always been too scared to want. he’s chosen you, and you’ve chosen him, and he can’t believe it’s real

(id like to add that if kiss happens in the restaurant, then the whole place claps and some peeps are sitting with “😧😧” faces but Ford doesn't notice. HE ONLY SEES YOU)

my heart is broken though :(( the wedding that was supposed to happen but doesn’t, because gravity falls fandom is allergic to happiness! tragedy and science and destiny and fear— and YET!! his sweetheart keeps the ring. the weird alien ring that shimmers, and it matches your eyes because he designed it that way. Ford studied the spectrum of your irises. he matched it to a metal from a planet he swore he’d never forget

you still have the ring, wore it on a chain, you kept it safe. and when Ford sees the glint of alien gemstone, he just falls apart, his knees go weak all over again, just like 30 years ago. he doesn't know how to ask “you kept it? after all these years ?” without bursting into tears in front of his love. feeling emotional as well, you gift him a kiss on the cheek, staring into his brown eyes that have held onto their love, even after three decades lost in other worlds

oh emotional rollercoaster, from fluff to angst and now back to fluff, thanks anon :'')

so.. Mabel organizing your post-apocalypse wedding with, of course, glitter, rainbow themes, FLOWER CROWNS (need Ford in one), and a playlist that includes both classical violin and her favorite boy bands because “you’re old but you’re still in love and that’s what matters guys!” (Ford has to be dragged out of the lab three separate times but he makes it)

and this time, when he says “i do, my love,” he doesn’t trip over a single word.

and you, standing there, marrying the man who once shook through a speech because he loved you too much to say it right.

🫠🫠🫠

and YES to the Stan sidenote, btw!

i could talk about Stanley forever and ever but i’m pretty sure this ask is meant to be Ford-centric! but he’s absolutely the “you’re my spouse now, deal with it” type.

“hey, uh, so—uh, if you want. i mean you don’t have to, but like, technically, would you maybe wanna—be married? to me?? but it’s fine if not. totally cool. i mean i got a ring but, uh—where are you going?”

i love this ask so much

[nightcolorz]

ok armand's backstory is super tragic in the books but the show makes it even more devastating with The Implications. imagine marius leaving armand (his slave who he abused ever since he was a child) for the Evil Satan Cult and instead turning bianca (white rich woman)and choosing her as his new companion. makes me sick insane etc

OH MY GOD YES IM ALWAYS THINKING ABOUT THIS!!! In the books Armand is also technically Marius’s slave, but the way it’s portrayed from Armand’s perspective encourages u to forget about that. But the way the show highlights how Armand was a slave and shows how it influences the way Marius treated him annnndddd made Armand a person of color adds such a disturbing layer to an already disturbing dynamic. (Which i love lol)

I loooveee that u brought up Bianca bcus the whole dynamic with Bianca is sooo fucked up and no one ever talks about it. In blood and gold Marius explains that he was lonely and wanted a vampire companion, who he originally wanted to be Bianca, but he felt super mf guilty about this bcus Bianca is a young well off bright white girl and by turning her into a vampire and taking her for himself he’d be depriving her of her chance at a prosperous life and humanity. And the way Marius gets over angsting about how badly he wants Bianca but how he can’t take her cuz it’d be fucked is by BUYING ARMAND!! Marius buys Armand bcus he considers him *less of a person* than Bianca and therefor someone he can use and abuse without any guilt. So now that Armand is a person of color, that dynamic It’s basically like, “I can’t harm this sweet white girl even tho i want to so bad, that would be horrible!!! Wait, Oh my god yay!!! A brown boy <3 I can do as many terrible things that I want to him because he isn’t human to me <3” like holy shit that is sickening. And it’s such a nail on the coffin how once Marius decides to discard Armand bcus he’s not worth saving to him he immediately turns Bianca and decides that she’s his companion now, like oh my god.

making Armand a person of color was honestly one of my favorite (if not my fav) change that amc made with the characters. In the books Armand is always portrayed as having this ambiguous social oppressor that causes him to be seen as less then human or less worthy of inherent respect + dignity as other ppl, especially in his human lifetime, and it is so prevailing throughout his life that Armand is used to being treated like he’s nothing, so Armand being a person of color just makes sense to me. Not only that, but his entire backstory where there is so much emotional weight put on how Armand was stripped of his cultural identity and his birth name and his connection to religion by being sold into slavery so he’s lost the ability to understand who he is ?!?!? Like it’s kind of insane to me sometimes that all of the aspects of Armand’s backstory in the show that are very much racial trauma happened the exact same way in the books 😭. It makes a little too much sense lol

thank u sm for the ask I love angsting about Armand’s backstory more then anything!!!! ❤️❤️

[dappledpaintbrush]

What do you think of the SPM villains as a whole? I'm going to make a wild guess and assume your favourite is Dimentio based off only my obvious mind reading intellect-

Please go into as much detail as your heart desires. I love this game a lot and hearing about it makes me very happy. It's my special interest, and I am deprived of obsessive rants over this game that aren't my own.

I hate dimentio fym. Let’s kill him.

LMAOAOAOAOAO but real talk: ANOTHER PERSON WITH AN SPM SPECIAL INTEREST?;?? WOOHOO!!!!! HIP! HIP! HOORAY!! we are now Blood Brothers

I apologize if I’m misinterpreting and you have already seen the post, but I have answered an ask before that is what you’re looking for- here it is! :3 I went into hefty detail on each member of Team Bleck. Trust me, it’s very long LMAOAO

HOWEVER… if you are not talking about just Team Bleck and are referring to the other villains as well- then…

Fracktail/Wracktail:

Fracktail has always. Stuck with me. First of all, his theme goes HARD????? Good lord, go ACTUALLY listen to it if you haven’t. It’s the equivalent of this

Anyways, Fracktail has always made me feel sad. And when I was younger, he scared me. It scared me that he died for something that wasn’t even his fault. Like dude usually when characters get brainwashed and they eventually regain control, they get a happy ending and stuff. Fracktail BLEW UP??? I personally just can’t stand it when characters reap something they never sowed- and this applies to characters as minuscule as Fracktail.

Now. Wracktail. He is. Interesting.

Both Fracktail and Wracktail are incredible examples of how INSANELY POWERFUL Ancient magic is, but Wracktail is a bit different. Wracktail refers to himself as a god multiple times. Is this actually true, or is he “making it up” or exaggerating? Were the Ancients capable of CREATING DEITIES? Were Grambi and Jaydes former Ancients who turned themselves into gods? Are the Pixls classified as gods? After all, both the Pixls and Wracktail are immortal unless harmed, and they were both created by the ancients. But if you can die from an injury, are you really a god? Or, like I stated before, is Wracktail not actually a god?Something else interesting is that Wracktail seems to be aware of Shadoo’s existence. HOW? Does Wracktail posses some kind of omnipotence? Did Shadoo reveal herself to Wracktail out of pity because they were both created and ruined by the Ancients? HOW. WHAT. WHY. Ugh I could go on FOREVER. It’s not that deep, sure, but it’s fun to ponder.

Bonechill:

Bonechill. Was. Wasted.

One of the MOST intriguing parts about Super Paper Mario is- and I’ve talked about this a lot- the extremely bold references to Christianity. Bonechill is a carbon fucking copy of Satan, and he was BOOOOOOOORRRINGG

WHY . WHY DID THEY WASTE THIS CHARACTER. WHY CAN YOU BEAT HIM SO FAST IT CAN BE TURNED INTO A GIF. HOW DOES HE KNOW ABOUT LUVBI BEING A PURE HEART?? Oh yeah, I know, BECAUSE HE WAS A FALLEN ANGEL, AND CLEARLY HE HAD TO HAVE BEEN EXTREMELY CLOSE WITH AND TRUSTED BY GRAMBI TO BE AWARE OF LUVBI’S ORIGINS. HELL, EVEN IF BONECHILL SPIED ON A CONVERSATION OR SOMETHING, HE STILL HAD TO HAVE BEEN VERY CLOSE WITH GRAMBI TO BE CAPABLE OF DOING THAT. IS THAT WHY HE WAS CASTED OUT OF HEAVEN? BECAUSE HE BETRAYED GRAMBI? YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SHOULDVE DONE? THEY SHOULDVE HAD A SCENE BETWEEN GRAMBI AND BONECHILL ABOUT THIS. BUT NOOOOOOOOOO MY NAME IS BONECHILL IM EVIL MWHAHAHAAH OHH IM DEAD DAMN NVM! FUCK.

But on a funnier note this part in KoopaKungFu’s let’s play always made me laugh as a kid

But What do you mean Bonechill was just. Standing there. I know nobody commented on it because this is a video game (it’s funny regardless LMAO). BUT WERE GRAMBI AND BONECHILL TALKING (I say talking, but this doesn’t mean they were calm about it) ABOUT THEIR PAST? OR DID THEY FIGHT BECAUSE GRAMBI IS INJURED. DID THEY DO BOTH? WHY. WAS . THE FACT. BONECHILL. KNOWS. ABOUT. LUVBI. AND. THAT. HE. WAS. A . FALLEN. ANGEL. NEVER. TALKED. ABOUT. MY BLOOD. PRESSURE. IS. RISING.

Blumiere’s Father:

I wish I could say a lot more about him, but surprisingly I’ve never gotten around to making headcanons for him/Blumiere. It’s crazy because you know that in his head he believes he is doing the right thing for his son and for the Tribe of Darkness as a whole. What kind of indoctrination did he have to go through to believe that KILLING somebody simply because she and his son loved one another was a rational and reasonable course of action. God I wish we knew at least a LITTLE more about him- but the minuscule amount of scenes he has makes his impact on the story that much more harrowing.

King Croacus:

I fw King Croacus heavy. My favorite drag queen of all time. God he’s so cool.

As somebody who is lore obsessed, I ADORE the fact we got so many details on the rulers of the Floro Sapiens. It’s something the developers did not have to do yet they did it anyways. Every time I walk through that hall in the game I read every single plaque.

It’s also? Really disturbing how we KILLED this guy? I know he comes back post-game but like regardless we did kill a guy who’s mind was deteriorating because of polluted water. Like that shit wasn’t his fault. He died for the faults of the Cragnons, who basically got off scot-free (unless you killed some of the brainwashed individuals). It’s an interesting metaphor for a variety of things that occur in reality.

Also, his theme is REALLY underrated. I know it’s simple, but I love it so much. King Croacus fans ASSEMBLE!

Francis:

When you’re trying to save all worlds but this fuckass Redditor downvotes you

Francis was one of the most genius parts of this game. Holy shit. I don’t even know what to say. He was so ahead of his time it’s actually scary. That whole chapter is one of the funnest parts of the game. All the niche references, the poking fun at Francis-like people, god it’s PEAK.

Something that’s interesting is that his Castle is implied to be where the Tribe of Darkness lived. Which is fucking hilarious. I personally prefer the idea that Castle Bleck was the old TOD home but that’s literally wrong. Carson said the TOD lives in a castle in the woods. Where do we see a castle in the woods. Uh huh. (I can get even more insane- the podium where Tippi’s cage was held. The podium that for some reason has a mechanism to hide it deep in the ground. Hmmm. A book can fit there. Can’t it. HMMMM) (I’m scraping the bottom of the barrel man somebody save me).

Also. Wokackness aside. Francis is terrifyingly smart. He created a PIXL. That’s something that I feel like is incredibly overlooked. How did he do that. How. ? HUH. ????????

Pixl Queen/Shadoo:

well you see uh

(no but seriously. I don’t even know where to begin. She’s one of my favorite characters in the game and we never ever get to see her. She’s heartbreaking. She’s devastating. She’s terrifying. She has nobody looking out for her. She is alone. But she fights so hard to be seen. She starts a war. She tries to kill every walking Ancient and the heroes of the Light Prognosticus. She screams and she cries and she begs and she pleas but nobody can hear her nor is listening. She is punished for being loved. She is punished for her wrath. She is still here in the form of shadows in the cracks on the Trial walls but is that even her anymore? She did not deserve to die so young, but that death was infinitely more merciful than all that occurred after. She was born to die. It’s why she is still alive.)

Big Blooper:

blooooop lmao

[lqfiles]

WE ARE SO FUCKING BACK WHOLE HOUSE JOLLY

okay so i’m on vacations and i wasn’t expecting any updates and also i’ve been so busy and tired so i didn’t check tumblr since like a month ago and why no one told me you updated like ten times since the last chapter i read……

chapter 54: satanic mind manipulation

we LOVE pathetic men but i’m the nostalgic doomer i fear….

why would he send her that to check if he’s blocked like he could have just said hi or something 😭 and yangyang being so petty…. we love you king

mark is so funny i want him so bad

chapter 55: cucklord

jaemin asking for money his ass is nawt serious like have some shame????

“anything for you” GODDD BRING MY FAMILY BACK PLEASE

noooo not him feeling like it would be too much to ask her to watch the episodes together and her thinking he wasn’t interested enough im going to be SICK i can’t do this anymore 💔 and rei as always being so wise we love you cutie pie

MARK 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 not him scheming with yangyang they are real ones but also yy calling him a cucklord is DIABOLICAL 😭😭😭😭 i seriously love him (your humor)

chapter 56: when you kinda gaf

nooooo why would haechan block yangyang who is going to be a hater now ☹️ also i wonder how (old) y/n would feel if she knew about jaehyun (kinda) knowing about her love life now she dgaf

“i really miss you ngl” we should all just kill ourselves idk

“missing #her meanwhile she’s probably sleeping rn” killed myself 41 times in my head this past hour. she’s so brave for asking him directly i could never

karina and jaemin not supporting her i hope they know im on their walls.

not related to ptp // riku finally being back we fucking cheered i missed him so much i was starting to go insane

chapter 57: when you been thuggin it out for so long

4572 likes what do y’all know about him. also officially going insane rn cause haechan black hair is my favorite color on him like he makes me feel insane things

i love when he says things outta pocket and shes like excuse me? so he apologize and starts pretending to act normal again

her admitting and understanding her feelings i’m so proud of my pookie she deserves to be happy and oh my sweet and wise reí we love you i really owe you my life

chapter 58: a second try

FINALLY THEY ARE (kinda) HAVING THAT MUCH NEEDED CONVERSATION

“hyuck” OH 😭☹️❤️‍🩹😭🥰😢❤️‍🩹😍😁😅❤️

“i'm really trying to stay nonchalant about this right now but i'm lowk about to jump in the air” in fact he couldn’t be more chalant ❤️

“YIPPIEEEEE” OH GOD WE LOVE LOSER MEN

“i've been missing you this whole time but this is making me miss you even more. i can't wait to see you” REAL MALE YEARNING IS OFFICIAL BACK

him reacting like that to her calling him good boy… why am i lowkey smiling rn

she LOVES him MY GOD LIFE IS SO GOOD and mark i need you to stop being jealous is officially over for you now you’ve done your work and you can finally rest

they hugged and she is in his house on his bed watching family guy together again AND he’s sleeping next to her i used to pray for times like this

NEW HAECHAN HAIR NEW BEGINNINGS NEW UPDATE NEW LQFILES THEME NEVER KILL YOURSELF SMILING THROUGH IT ALL CANT BELIEVE THIS IS MY LIFE

hiii sweetie pie i hope february is treating you well and you’re healthy happy and having enough time to rest<3 i LOVED the updates so much and can’t believe we’re finally here !!! read you later, have an amazing rest of the week ❤️

also adding a written part as a bonus oh lqfiles my queen you’re so generous with us BUT not to be that kind of person but tomorrow (feb 13) is my birthday…. can we get a new update?😁 (i know we won’t since im sending this so late but a girl can dream) mwah ily

MY AEGIBEAR….. i’m sorry pls take this update i’m gonna post as a late birthday present 💔 urgh i feel bad but i hope you had a spectacular birthday and had looooots of nice food and fun and went out and did something enjoyable OR stayed in and enjoyed your time inside, i hope you got lots of presents and everyone showered you with birthday wishes 🥹🥹 i love you and appreciate you for always coming here and even making time during your holiday!!! #IsaIsIrresistibleDay would’ve been the bday tag IF I WAS ON FREAKING TIME. i hope february has been treating you well, for me it’s been meh it could always be better but we are MANAGING. urgh anyways let me dissect your lovely paragraph

chapter 54: HDJDHSJDHS he did it on a whim tbh like he just let his hands roam around and BOOM that random keyboard smash was his first introduction back. this goofert. also i’m crying so bad at the fact that every time you guys call mark funny you add that you want him so baddhdjshdjdh WHEN HE FUNNY AND SEXYYYY #WeNeedThaT

55: i was having a balllo writing that little moment where they both were like “why didn’t he do that” “why didn’t i ask that” LIKE GOSHHH BRING OUR FAMILY BACK BY TONIHHT OR WE WILL END IT ALL. mark and yanfyang are such instigators liekdhfjdj one is put on earth to torment y/n while the other torments haechan like THESE BASTARDS- and thank u for loving my humour wait 🥹🥹💗 truly the way to my heart btw…

56: YN WOULD WANNA KILL HERSWLF IF SHE FOUNF OUT JAWHYUN KNEW. i mean she knows that haechan and jaehyun are kinda tight because of that birthday surprise but if she finds out he gets all the tea on what happens in his love life then… oh it’s about to be ENDED. lowk we should’ve all killed ourselves ages ago. jaemrina are just rlly skeptics log haechan because they don’t like seeing y/n sad and he caused her a lot of pain 💔💔 it’s okay they’ll get over it!! AND SIS IVE BEEN SO GEEKED OVER THIS RIKU RETURN LIKE FERKKK INJECT IT IN MEEEEE riku you mean the world to us welcome back kingie 😭😭🤍

57: my actual soulmate. i do not play about black haired hawchan either and when that mullet combo comes into it… ouh don’t mention it near me i get weird crazy 😂✌🏽 HDJFHSJDHWJ he’s trying to test the water and realise this isn’t a safe zone yet like try it in a few months when you two are together king… and REI DESERVES HER FLOWERS AND WE ALL OWE HER OUR LIVES SHE IS THE TRUE MVP OF RHIS ALL. this queenka😭

58: we just love very chalant loserish make yearners who get giddy over their girl not being mad at them anymore 🥹 i was so happy to write them normal again like we are so freaking back why do we suddenly love life so bad omg… they’re such cuties i adore them (i created them). and LMAODHSIEJ hyuck got a taste of his own medicine and went wait why did that kinda feel good- who’s a good boy… haechannie is!!! she really does love him like she couldn’t pretend like she didn’t anymore and now that she know haechan does too she feels so giddy!!! AND HEDISHDKSH MARK IS JUST DOING IT TO TROLL it’s an engagement bait~ tho he will miss it a little… that was his cookie first 🤦🏽‍♀️

urgh i seriously love you so much i hope life is treating you rlly well and that you’re always happy and healthy and i missed you and i love you and YEAH HAPPY LATE FREAKING BIRTHDAY QUEEN!!!! user lqfiles hopes you’re doing well~ 😛😛😛💓💓💕😘😘💋💋👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

[strawberry-cowmilk]

remember that one scenario I did about the brother saying just die already.

While, im going to make it heart warming. Just watch.

Now, both mc and the brother|which I shall name Felix| where both giving each other the silent treatment with the brothers silently encourageing it.

now one day after school, the brothers saw Felix run out of school,

then half n hour later, they saw,while, walking back home. Felix was walking over to mc who was sitting on a bench. He was holding a big white box and 4 paper bags.

he sat down Infront of mc, who looked up with a raised eyebrow.

"mc."

"Felix."

Felix looked at his older sister before slowly pushing the box and bags towards mc.

"two of the bags are filled with french fries and the other I two is filled with meaty cheesy burgers I could find."

then felix points at the white box, "this is half chocolate fudge brownies And the other half is red velvet cake"

mc loved burgers and chips. And she was always saying how she craved brownies and red velvet cake.

Felix then looked at his sister in the eyes, "mc, I am very sorry for saying what i said, there is no excuse in the world for what I said to you."

He started to cry,"please forgive me."

Mc looked at her brother before standing up and walked towards her brother and gave him a hug.

"it's perfectly fine, Felix."

Hi! Again I'm sorry about the insanely long delay

the brothers react to mc and their brother forgiving each other

mc's gender is not mentioned, not proof read

content warnings: mentions of silent treatment

-----

Lucifer

he didn't step in during your phase of ignoring each other because he believes the two if you should work it out together

so he's glad you finally did

lucifer returns home and tells you he's glad all is well now after you arrive too

Mammon

'yo, I want some of the food-'

whether you want to share or not is up to you but mammon might get a bit dramatic if you don't

it kind of hits him later that you and your brother have stopped fighting though

Leviathan

ah, what does he do?

does he stay and watch or does he leave would you think it's weird if he was watching from afar?

levi ends up leaving the scene, he's glad you made up and all though

Satan

honestly he was avoiding your brother too, satan didn't like him

and this actually doesn't change much about those feelings

it's nice everything is less tense now though

Asmodeus

guy who doesn't like your brother regardless of what he just did 2.0

asmo just thinks he's immature plus he stole his bath bomb once

but hey at least he apologised to you

Beelzebub

finally, he was getting worried about the constant ignoring

it was wrong of both parties, even though he feels like he enabled it by not doing anything

in the end it was your conflict to solve

Belphegor

he accidentally walked in on it, this was his favorite napping bench and it was occupied

belphie just left then, it was beel who told him what had happened

he's glad, but that doesn't change the fact he still does not like your brother

[forever-rogue]

I absolutely love your writing, especially your recent Bucky x reader ones! they’re so good and make me so happy :,)

could you maybe do a second part to the recent one you wrote about Bucky realizing he wants a family? Maybe him voicing his wanting of a baby to the reader?

A/N: mhmm, mhmm, enjoy a lil spice and a nervous, fumbling Bucky! No spoilers!

Pairing: Bucky x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 1.1k

Warnings: slight language, very suggestive themes😏

PART 1 HERE

BUCKY MASTERLIST

MAIN MASTERLIST

»»————-　♡　————-««

"Buck?" you called to him as you moved about the kitchen, pulling out another tray of fresh cookies from the oven. He was in the adjacent living room, watching the baseball game, although you weren't sure how much he was actually watching. He hadn't made a single comment or sound as he normally would. He'd been awfully quiet most of the afternoon.

You stole a glance into the living room and found him staring at the television with a concentrated expression on his face. You chuckled softly as you shook your head, "James? Honey?"

“Mhmm?” something about the sweet moniker caused him to snap back into reality as he looked over at you and offered a gentle smile, “do you need a hand?”

“Unless you want to taste-test then no,” you laughed as he immediately stood up and waltzed into the kitchen, “I had a feeling that would get your attention. I made your favorites, Bucky.”

“Have I ever told you how wonderful you are?” he reached for one of the freshly baked cookies with his vibranium hand, but you were faster and slapped him out of the way. His mouth opened and closed as he pouted in surprise, “no fair!”

“They’re fresh out of the oven!”

“It’s the vibranium hand!” 

“Your mouth isn’t made of vibranium! Try one of the ones that’s been cooled!” you raised an eyebrow and crossed your arms over your chest as he huffed in defeat and grabbed a cookie off the other tray, “besides, my love, you haven’t told me what’s been on your mind all day…”

“What do you mean? Nothing’s been on my mind-” he grumbled through a mouth full of cookie.

‘Don’t you dare lie to me, James Buchanan Barnes,” you raised an eyebrow as he feigned innocence for a moment longer, “I know better than you think apparently. I could practically hear the gears turning in your head! Besides, you’re watching the game and you’ve been silent the entire. It’s a dead giveaway.”

“You’re smarter than I give you credit for, you know that?” he joked as you rolled your eyes dramatically before both of you broke into a fit of giggles.

“You’re lucky I love you so much,” you walked over to him, leaning up and pressing a kiss to his cheek. He sighed lightly at your gentle touch before snaking his arms around your waist as he pulled you into his body and kissed you deeply. You leaned into his touch as you practically felt your body belt into a puddle of mush, “now out with it, Bucky. What’s on your mind?”

“I want a baby.”

The declaration was loud and clear as you immediately pulled back from his touch and gave him a curious expression. A warm, red flush crept into his cheeks as his blue eyes widened in surprise. He quickly opened and closed his mouth a few times as you enjoyed watching him struggle. 

“Okay.”

“W-what?” he asked as you laughed at him lightly, putting a hand on his chest before you stole a few more kisses from him, “sweetheart...I…”

“I know what you meant, Bucky,” you answered softly, “well, literally and metaphorically. I had a feeling this had been on your mind lately...frankly, if I’m being quite honest, it’s been on my mind too.”

“Really?” he asked incredulously as you nodded slowly, “ever since...we went to your sister’s and saw Aurora. I just can’t help but think that maybe one day...we could have that too. A family of our own. A baby or two…”

"Hmm," you mused softly as he shifted on his feet and gave you a nervous look, “you’ve quickly gone from one to two…”

“I was just-”

“I know, James,” placing a hand on his cheek, you swiped your thumb gently over his soft skin, “I’m just giving you a hard time. How about we just get through one to start with and see how it goes?”

“You want this too?” his voice shook as you wiggled your eyebrows at him, “I don’t want you to feel like we have to do this…”

“I want this too, James,” you whispered, inadvertently biting your bottom lip in a way that drove him crazy, “of course I want a family with you, my love. I’m not going to lie - seeing you with the baby and Sam’s nephews kind of drives me insane.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah.” you leaned in closely,  almost whispering in his ear, “because I want you to put a baby in me. I want to see you holding and playing with our babies. I kept thinking about how good I’d look all round and cute and pregnant with your baby. I can let everyone I’m yours and you’re mine.”

“Oh.”

“What do you say, Bucky?’ you nipped at the delicate skin of his neck and jaw before trailing kisses up to his lips, “I want you to get me pregnant. I want to start our family.”

“I want to marry you,” his hands, one warm and gentle and one firm and cool, found purchase on your waist as he pulled you close and kissed with a fervent hunger, “fuck - want to make you my wife.”

“Mrs. Barnes has a nice ring to it,” you agreed, fighting back a gasp as he worked on giving you some hickies of your own, “marry me then, Bucky. I want to be your wife.”

“Gonna marry you and start our family,” his voice was low and thick as you carded a hand through his dark hair. 

“Why wait on the family?” you asked, causing him to look at you with inquisitive eyes, “let’s start today. We can try and try and try until it happens. Practice makes perfect, right?”

“You don’t want to get married first?”

“It’s not the 1940s Buck, we can do whatever we want,” you reminded him, grabbing his jaw gently as you slowly ground against him and gave him a few lingering kisses, “I know we’ll be together forever, fancy piece of paper or not. Now what do you say? Put a baby in me already.”

“Fuck yes.”

»»————-　♡　————-««

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[absolutepokemontrash]

omg omg well now im interested in all of the kids backgrounds/families but i can't choose which to ask about... Wildcard?

I’ll do all of them how about that? Time for some DRAMA!

Once again, link to the OG post explaining everything here.

Everything’s under the read more!

Lucifer’s kid, Venus! (The OG)

(Venus goes by they/them pronouns)

Venus’ ren has already gotten screentime in the main fic, but a quick rundown of them is: They grew up in a family of magic users so they already knew plenty about demons and the Devildom, they’re a professional musician, and they’re one of the only people in the known multiverse that can calm Venus down from anything.

Venus worships their parents, their father for his reputation and power (and later his overall dad-ness) and their ren for raising them so lovingly.

But… Vee’s ren has a bit of a shifty side to them… they put on the act of ditzy dumb human, but there’s a lot more craftiness behind those eyes…

Mammon’s Kid, Ash! (There they arrrreeeee!!)

(Ash goes by They/she/he pronouns, they hoard pronouns like a gender dragon.)

Oh god bless Ash’s poor parent…

She had a wonderful week just kicking it with Mammon, and then one day they wake up, he’s gone, so is some of their stuff, and he’s left them with a baby.

…yay…

This isn’t actually entirely Mam’s fault, he got summoned back into the Devildom before he could leave any contact info, and he was just lookin’ at the watches! Honest!

But anyway, Ash’s ren wasn’t getting paid the best salary as a nurse, but they got by. They also didn’t know about the whole demon thing, and they despise Mammon for it… (but not Ash, it’s not their fault.) Being a greed demon, Ash has always had a hunger gnawing away at their gut for more, they wanted the finer things in life, but what they really truly want is for their ren to really know that they aren’t the scumbag they think their dad is. They want to put their ren in a nice house somewhere where they don’t have to worry about money ever again!

Levi’s Kid, Percy! :D

(Percy uses he/they pronouns!)

Percy’s mother met Levi at an anime con in the human world, she was dressed as Neo Queen Serenity, he was dressed as Tuxedo mask… it was so romantic… until Levi cried midway through sex because he hadn’t been given any kind of physical affection for a while

But yea, Percy’s mom is actually quite well off, she has a massive indoor pool, good for Percy because when she gave them a bath for the first time they sprouted gills and a tail, so uh… they need the swimming space.

Percy’s mother wasn’t aware of any demon-y happenings, she had a pretty normal life until she had her snake-baby. (She loves him very very much though)

Percy themselves on the other hand, they’re really happy and positive! They try and keep their mood up and not let their envy get the better of them… no matter how hard it is sometimes…

Satan’s Kid, Lyssa! 

(Lyssa goes by they/she pronouns!)

So uh… Satan fucked a married woman.

…

…*distant applause from Asmo, known marriage ruiner*

Lyssa did NOT have the best time growing up, her life SUCKED because she looked nothing like her mother, and ALL like her real biological deadbeat demon dad (alliteration, how do you like that, English teachers?!). Because she’s half WRATH DEMON, she would fly into a rage insanely often and just wreck shit. It didn’t help that she was in a constant state of stress because both of her human parents resented her appearance and existence and only stayed together and kept her around to keep up their reputation.

Lyssa actually gets summoned into the Devildom in their clothes from juvie… yeah… one of Lyssa’s rampages ended up hurting someone. She and Satan get off to a rocky start, both parties being real jerks about everything, until they finally have that cliche kind of heart to heart talk about emotions and junk.

Okay, onto Lyssa’s relationship with Venus, that shit is wholesome as hell. Lyssa was trying to scare Venus away, but Venus has crackhead determination so it didn’t work. Lyssa had a full scale “why aren’t you leaving like everyone else..?” breakdown, and after that, Venus added another blond child to their now growing list of them.

Asmo’s kid, Cecil! (My baaaaaby…)

(Cecilia goes by they/them pronouns)

(Just to be safe, I’m going to put a trigger warning up for implied emotional abuse, please don’t read the first paragraph or so if it’s going to upset you)

Cecil’s mother is as anxious and skittish as Cecil themselves, and Cecilia learned this behaviour due to the upsetting fact that not every boyfriend of their mother was as nice as Asmo was. (Not that Cecil knew Asmo before the exchange program). At the time of the exchange program beginning, this particular piece of human trash was out of the picture, but the figurative mark he left on Cecil’s life was still very much there. (I’m sure Asmo wreaked some bloody vengeance on that sumbitch)

Cee’s mom does love her baby, even if she is a little… scared of them sometimes. I can’t exactly blame her for this, imagine if your one-night stand resulted in a baby that suddenly grew wings and horns… but everything she does is to make sure she and Cecil have the best life possible. (And because I’m not completely evil, Cecil’s mom finds someone who treats her right after Cecil goes to live with Asmo).

Beel’s Twins, Cane and Pepper!

(Both twins go by they/them pronouns)

The twins 2.0 were actually raised by the sorcerer’s society. Their human parent put them up for adoption just after they were born, and the sorcerer’s society couldn’t exactly have not one, but TWO baby gluttony half-demons running around, so they took the two in.

They both didn’t exactly have a concrete caretaker, they really only had teachers and other magic users who would pop in to act as parent figures. Oh well at least they had each other!

Just a refresher, Pepper is a capybara, Cane is a fucking honey badger on crack cocaine. They’re also identical, so it’s very hard to tell them apart… fuck with the wrong twin and you’re free trial of life will expire.

Funny story, Lucifer once strung up the wrong twin, and since Pepper’s so chill, they just hung their without issue for the whole night.

Belphie’s kid, Arien!

(Arien goes by he/they pronouns)

I went into it in this ask, but I’ll add a bit more flavour.

Arien’s mom was a well respected witch, and uh… okay, fuck, have another trigger warning for doing the deed under the influence of alcohol, because there is no way in hell she would have survived the encounter if Belphie wasn’t wasted.

Overall, Arien’s mom just didn’t care about Arien as a separate person, more like a prize. The only Half Human spawn of the Avatar of Sloth was her achievement, not her kid… unless the title of mother suited her in the moment. Yeah… she’s not a good lady…

[domthedevil]

AHHHH SO CUTE, how about doing mammon next?

Of course our first man is excited to do this hahaha. Mammon is truly the most honest about his feelings for MC so I got all soft.

Be Gentle pt 6

Warnings: Mammon x afab!mc, loss of virginity

Mammon was furious. The fact that anyone else thought they had a chance of being your first was absurd. He was your first pact. He was your first friend. And you were his first love. There was no way he’d let anyone trivialize your wants and needs. Even if he wasn’t fully aware of it himself. So when he shouted the loudest and left the most dramatically, the other brothers could tell how upset he was. But they let him be. Too busy continuing a new conversation.

In his room, Mammon sat on the edge of his bed. Mindlessly scrolling through Akuzon for something, anything to take his mind off how angry his brothers had made him. But soon that anger turned to anxiety. Maybe you wouldn’t choose him. No matter how hard he fought to be your number one, maybe he still wasn’t...

A chime on his phone snapped him out of the depressive thought. Smiling a little, he opened the message you had just sent him.

“Are you busy?”

“Nope. What’s up?”

“I’ve been thinking about something, and I wanted to ask you a question.”

A question you couldn’t text? He frowned a moment, not sure what to say or what to expect.

“I’m in my room. C’mere.”

As soon as he sent the text, Mammon rushed to tidy his room. Cleaning was just too much, but he could at least move his dirty clothes off the bed and put his magazines in a neater pile. He froze when he heard you knock. Using a second to compose himself, Mammon slowly answered the door. Giving his confident grin he swung the door open.

Taking a step back you laughed at how eager he seemed, despite knowing he was probably preparing his room before answering. Wasting no time, you headed straight for his bed to sit down. You patted the spot next to you. Taking his hands in yours you placed a gentle kiss on his cheek. You knew you were ready the moment you saw his reddened face.

“.....” Mammon was speechless. Absolutely lost for words as his face felt like fire. Your request was expected and yet not.

“Do you...not want to?” Your meek question snapped him out of his daze.

“N-no! I mean yes! I mean- ugh!!” Mammon pulled you I to a tight embrace. “I...I love you MC. I’ll be gentle.”

You felt yourself sink into the mattress as he rested beside you. Slowly you turned to face him, both of you leaning in for a few soft kisses. Looking into your eyes for any doubt, Mammon kissed you more cautiously than you’d have liked. Taking initiative, your hand rested against his chest while the other ran down his side. Like an invitation, Mammon’s eager hands traced your body with a methodical but clumsy touch.

“I wanna touch you more.” Mammon’s heated whisper cut through the sounds of your kissing and heavy breathing. Shedding your clothing, he watched as you tossed each article aside. Moving so that you were under him, the demon ran his fingertips in light trails from your chest to your thighs. A shiver ran over as you felt his eyes burning into you.

“M-Mammon...” he snapped out of yet another daze. As he locked lips with yours he made quick work of his own jacket and shirt. Not wanting to spoil the surprise just yet as he worked you up more and more, he stopped just after removing his pants. But you could see the strong outline of his hardening length. You could feel yourself getting wet as he began to touch you more roughly.

Nipping and biting at your neck, Mammon distracted you from his roaming hands on your chest. Your arms wrapped around his neck as he teased you. He felt your hips buck against his cock, still barely separated from his underwear. You heard a deep growl as he moved his face lower. Sucking and leaving small marks as he ducked between your legs. Now your hands tugged at his snowy locks, pulling gently as his tongue lapped at your sensitive clit. A small jolt of pleasure shot through your core as he slowly, teasingly prodded the hood of your clit. Dragging out each sensation. Your thighs pressed against his head as he added his fingers into the mix. Suckling your pearl, his finger tips coated themselves in your slick; he began moaning at how wet you were.

You whispered how good it felt. How he was stretching you and touching places you’d never felt before. His hips rutted against the bed while you spoke. Mammon was getting desperate for attention. He hovered above you once again as his fingers moved faster, curled higher. Your expression was irresistible. Eyes half shut, mouth slightly open, panting and breathing heavy. All at his touch.

“I can’t take ya whisperin like this...MC...”

“I’m ready. I want it.” Your confident tone reassured him once again.

Kissing you soft at first, but quickly gaining momentum Mammon removed his underwear. You watched as his impressive cock moved between your folds. Spreading your legs wide for him, you got a much clearer view. You could see the way his dick glistened with your essence. Parting from you to meet your eyes, Mammon pressed himself against your entrance. Slowly, too slowly, he pressed the head of his dick inside you. It was nothing at first, but the sudden and sharp pain startled you as he kept moving. Trying not to make a sound was too much, the whimper you let out scared him too.

“M-MC! Are ya okay...?”

You nodded, now that he had given you a moment to adjust you could feel the pleasure of being full. With a wide smile you kissed his cheek.

“It feels good now, you can move.”

You heard him audibly gulp.

“Fuck that’s hot. Lemme know if...it’s too much.”

Mammon’s hips moved in gentle waves inside you. The feel of his entire length burying in you had you clutching the sheets. But yours eyes stayed open and focused on his. His deep colored eyes made a fire in your core build. He would always be your first man now.

“Mammon...it feels tight. And...full.”

Any comment you made had him thrusting deeper insider you. Leaning down he kissed and nibbled at your chest. Tasting your skin turned him on so much, and the glisten of sweat on you only added to your flavor.

He hissed as his hips unconsciously moved faster. Your moans grew louder as he tried his best not to. He wasn’t sure what kind of sounds he would make, obviously over excited for this moment. Your bent legs pressed against his waist as he moved. Mammon’s fingers intertwined with yours against the bed. The extra leverage helped his hips move faster. Though his pace was even, his cock seemed to hit a new spot every time. Your lips chanted his name while your voice cracked. The warmth from your core began to spread like wildfire.

“Harder...”

Mammon obliged immediately, loving the way your walls squeezed around him. He could feel how badly your body wanted to come.

“I’m so hot. Mammon I feel like I’m close.”

“Yeah? You like getting fucked like this?”

“M-Mammon...”

Your whine was all he needed. He wanted to tease you more, say dirty things to you while you both got closer to climaxing. But he promised to be gentle. This time at least. His words definitely stirred something in you. Made your toes and fingers tingle. Mammon’s cock hit deep inside you at a relentless pace. He was overindulging, but he was the Avatar of Greed.

“Come for me MC...I’ll come with ya.”

Pressing your lips against his neck, you couldn’t help biting him slightly as your body shook and quaked around Mammon’s cock. Feeling it so deep made your whole body sensitive. His hips continued to move and drove you insane. It felt good but too good. The spasming inside you grew in intensity. Mammon let out a low grunt and buried himself inside you again. His moan was almost a gasp as he released his thick seed into you.

Mammon composed himself with a quick shake of his head. Your face was a mix of pleasure and exhaustion, but his worried expression made you laugh.

“Hey! Don’t laugh!” His flustered state returned as he hugged you tightly, hiding his face in your neck. “...you’re not suppose to laugh...”

“Not at you. Im just...really happy.”

Mammon met your warm gaze again. Seeing your soft expression he kissed you deeply. Showering your cheeks in small pecks. Your arms held him just as tightly, and this time you hid your face in his neck.

“Can we...do it again?” Mammon couldn’t see your face, but he felt the heat on your cheeks.

“O-of course! THE Great Mammon is always ready.”

This is a continuation of a request, read more here:

Be Gentle (Levi x AFAB!MC)

Be Gentle (Belphegore x AFAB!MC)

Be Gentle (Satan x AFAB!MC)

Be Gentle (Beelzelbub x AFAB!MC)

Be Gentle (Asmodeus x AFAB!MC)

[kcatta-wodahs]

MC Who Does Not Fear Death x OM! Demon Brothers

Or maiming, or apparently any other consequences. You’ve walked into this situation with absolutely no filter and no fear. Time to tear down every structure of Devildom society.

Lucifer

You look at him with a withering stare when he tries to intimidate you into behaving.

“I was summoned out of my trashy apartment to this place, where literally anyone could snap me like a twig on accident. I’m just working on the assumption that I’m already dead.”

He sternly looks at you. “You’re under my protection during your time here. No harm will come to you.”

You snort derisively, which visibly irritates him. “Don’t worry about it. I won’t come back to haunt you if it happens.”

As you continue through your life in Devildom he keeps calling you out for meddling and all that, like usual, and he HATES that you literally *do not care* when he threatens you.

Like HE knows that he wouldn’t hurt Diavolo’s transfer student but YOU are supposed to be AFRAID of him dammit.

His frustration at this ends up turning into a form of respect. You’re about the only person who will stand up to him, and tbh like you’re so fucking fragile but you’ll yell at him all day? That takes guts. Annoying guts. But you’ve got guts.

But also STOP IT. He has enough stress in his life and now he’s constantly terrified that you’ve decided it’s a great idea to adopt a baby balrog

Which you did once. He’s just afraid that “Flamin Hot Cheeto” is going to come back since you somehow managed to imprint on it.

despite the fact that the BABY could easily tear your arms off on accident

Not to mention he gets the flack for EVERY SINGLE ONE of these following stories. You stress him out so much. Please. Please, stop. 

He’s almost to the point of begging. The Avatar of Pride is three steps away from either locking you away for the rest of the year or begging on his knees for you to calm down. 

 But you know you’d find a way out if he locked you up so no worries. It’ll be a good challenge.

Mammon

“Well you WON’T be dead because it’s my job to protect you! Are you doubting the Great Mammon?!”

Stupid human. Yeah, you’re fragile and weak, but that’s why HE’S your bodyguard now, and there’s no way in hell (lol) that he would let you die on his watch.

Lucifer would kill him.

You welcome the challenge, and he thinks it’s funny at first but quickly becomes a flustered mother hen.

“NO, we are NOT going out to Madam Scream’s at 3am! Do ya know what kinda CREEPS are out there at 3am?!”

And you sneak out the fucking window.

He has had more heart attacks in the past week than he has had in the last 100 years of life.

He starts agreeing to your ridiculous adventures JUST because then he can actually keep an eye on you. 

He adores the chaos of the laugh that bursts from you every time you narrowly escape death. 

He HATES how often you have to NARROWLY ESCAPE DEATH. So he will never tell you.

He almost doesn’t have time for his own shenanigans anymore, because all his time is taken up by trying to make sure you stay alive.

And you’ve figured out that if you turn *any* of your ideas into a money-making one, he will join you whole-heartedly.

So you bribe him because what’s money to you anymore anyway?

Leviathan

I mean he doesn’t leave his room much, so tbh he probably just gets texts from you that make him want to scream.

‘hey uh levi say if someone were to hypothetically be stuck in a succubus’ devil basement to become an unwilling sacrifice to asmo what would that person, hypothetically, do?’

‘probably die’ is usually all he sends back

You always come back, because he always sends a text to the other brothers. In that case Asmo came to rescue you himself and scold the succubus.

You become the friend that he makes funny throwing-shade reddit posts about. (Devvit? Devil reddit? Eh??)

‘Levi so this has nothing to do with anything but is there a cure for a dangerously potent ‘always win at rock-paper-scissors' curse? Asking for a friend’

‘Friend is being held hostage tho so maybe be quick about a response’

He didn’t even know that kind of curse existed. None of them did. What the fuck did you do.

How did you get taken captive by playing rock paper scissors?

He doesn’t know. Nobody does. He expects the play-by-play so he can recommend it as a new anime to his favorite producers. 

Somehow your chaotic plans end up with stories almost as great as TSL. 

Beelzebub

He physically carries you around.

He’s like “fuck this you can’t get into trouble if I’m holding you.”

If Beel’s on MC watching duty, he’s almost the only one who is successful, just because you physically cannot get away. 

But at the same time, he is very easily bribed. 

So yes, he’ll go to Madam Scream’s with you at 3am. Sounds like fun.

But he is very protective after losing someone he cares about (who you remind him of so much….) so he keeps you close when you’re out and about too.

If you start getting into a fight with some other demon he literally just takes the fight for you and wins with no trouble at all.

You like having Beel with you.

Especially finding street festivals! You’re in a whole new world and there’s a MILLION things to try. Beel is more than happy to try them with you.

But that leads to arguments about whether deadly creatures to humans are still deadly when dead. 

“No, you can’t eat that it’s on fire. I know even small fires hurt humans. I’ll eat it for you.”

“That hot sauce makes every demon I know cry. You really shouldn’t buy a bottle. Please. No, don’t try it. No, that’s too much for one-- oh. Oh no.”

He forgives you as long as you don’t actually get hurt and you give him your leftovers.

Asmodeus

“If I get wrinkles because of you I promise you will never hear the end of it. I will curse you forever.”

He swears on every single one of his lovers that you have started giving him grey hairs.

GREY HAIRS, MC.

Why can’t you just settle down and let them all take care of you? You don’t have to prove anything to the other demons!

But you will. You’re living in Devildom now, and by everything unholy, you are going to live that life to its fullest extent.

He was thrilled at first when you were all for joining him at his nightclubs and parties. Now he hides every party’s date from you.

That time you almost threw yourself off a balcony to try and emulate a very drunk demon’s newest dance move.

“I need to stay TRENDY, Asmo!! I’ll be fine!!”

Ever since learning Demonus doesn’t affect humans you have challenged every single stuck-up tough boy to a drinking contest.

And every single time you win, Asmo has had to *narrowly* save you from being killed by said demon.

And you just say “he deserved it” every time.

And like, yeah okay, he probably did but YOU’RE NOT ALLOWED TO DIE.

Somehow, you manage to out-party Asmo.

dON’T TELL THE OTHERS but he lives for the times when you practically fall asleep on his shoulder while coming home from a rager. You may not get drunk, but when you’re sleepy, you’re so affectionate and something in his heart melts.

Satan

At first, Satan was all for the rebellious “life life with no restraints” thought process you explained to him.

I mean, he didn’t like the assumption that he and his brothers couldn’t control themselves to not accidentally kill you, but also… fair.

But he didn’t realize that this mindset followed through for EVERY demon in ANY place.

Including RAD, where old and wizened demons were *really* not used to being contradicted

Which led to you “accidentally insulting” your 5000 year old Human Studies professor by giving them a pop quiz on current memes (which they failed).

And left Satan as the one who had to make sure that said professor didn’t kill you. 

And the thing is, this keeps happening.

You’ve written all over the school’s library books, pointing out every error.

You *continue* to argue with the demons who threaten to kill you when you say silly things like “No, Solomon did not learn his sorcery at Hogwarts because Hogwarts isn’t REAL.”

(Solomon, meanwhile, refutes you vehemently and seems to grow three inches taller every time you glare at him.)

Satan assures you that he values knowledge and truth and all that, but could you maybe find a less dangerous way to push it?

No can do, Satan, because you already had plans with Mammon to use a curse that writes the history of the actual Sorceric Academy that Solomon attended like 400 years all over the desks in Human Studies. It’s activated by anyone saying “Hogwarts”. 

No, no, Satan, it’s brilliant, because you can’t do magic. It can’t be you who did it.

Satan, no don’t tell Lucifer.

I thought you hated him. Satan, wait. 

You are the only person in the history of ever who convinces him to come to Lucifer for intervention. You wear that badge with pride and also deep, deep, bitter sadness. 

Belphegor

Like, through the plot your willingness to be a thorn in anyone’s side just to get more information really works for Belphie.

He’s like all I gotta do is ask? Sweet. Yeah. Go, human.

But then when he’s all big and threatening and “im gonna kill you” and you just kind of look at him and nod like “yeah, this checks out.” 

Frankly, that’s rude, MC. 

And then he keeps threatening to kill you and it doesn’t even PHASE you like. You just keep listening to him rant and going “OH i think i get it now”

He liked that you were always looking for more information when he was the one pushing you around, but now?

No. Human, he is going to KILL you here, STOP ASKING QUESTIONS.

And then you do the time-travel bit, and see that he *literally has killed you in one timeline* and you just like

Shrug it off and keep talking about Lilith???????

Tbh what probably stopped him from doing it again is just that you’re fucking insane, MC 

“MC, you literally just saw yourself dead in Mammon’s arms”

You wave your hand vaguely in his direction and say, “Yeah okay, but can we talk about the lack of communication in this household because it is tearing this family apart.”

What the fuck MC

When he’s back to normal, tbh he loves that side of you. He loves getting into shit when he’s not sleeping. He will 100% encourage you and be there to make sure that you *don’t* actually die again.

He’s the only one who doesn’t actually try to stop you. Who knew he was so into chaos.

But if you try to drag him to a plan when he should be sleeping he will be like Beel and literally just hold you down while he naps dammit. You brought this on yourself. He needs sleep.

[iamthedrunkgiraffe]

i have tik tok drafts that are literally too painful to watch because they are from a time which i was literally dying mentally and it’s like horrible to see myself in that state but also amazing bc then i compare them and it’s just insane how much i’ve glown up and progressed and kind of found and accepted myself, like my life is NOT PERFECT AT ALL, but i was definitely at rock bottom last year and it’s just really nice to see that i’m making it through yet another winter, but this time without the dead/psycho/disassociating look in my eyes. it doesn’t seem possible that someone could be all of those things at once but i definitely was and i feel like it was just physically rolling off of me. it’s also crazy to think how visible and noticeable the fact that i was literally falling apart was, and how it not only stemmed from the people around me, but that it was also ignored completely. like to me i see just a video or a picture of myself at that time and im shocked, but some people actually saw me and talked to me every day and didn’t even acknowledge my issues. it’s a really important aspect that i need to consider when i think about my old friends and miss them, that they didn’t really care about me. sometimes it really seems like they did, and they seem so fun to be around, and i miss them a lot, but i need to remember that when i was speaking about the issues in my life they were literally ignoring and talking over me. i just cannot emphasize enough the chaos and disgustingness of my mental state at that time, like i was truly rotting away. it was a huge fight every day at every moment. like i wasn’t just fighting to wake up, i was fighting with every second of the day, and every person in my life, including myself. i was high for almost every minute of it too cuz i was so miserable. everything that happened was so horrible and confusing. i was constantly confused. nothing made sense. i thought i was in actual hell multiple times. now i don’t know about how much of this was visible, but there was obviously a lot going on up in the old noggin. now, if my friends literally just didn’t notice, they did not care or give a fuck about me. if they literally were ignoring my 8 month long depressive/psychotic episode, they are literal shitbags for not caring enough to say something. either way, they are shitbags. they always have, and always will be, dirtbag scum for they say they acted about my mental issues. i’m not saying that they’re responsible because of their lack of involvement, but as my literal lifelong best friends, they should’ve AT LEAST FUCKING ACKNOWLEDGED IT. THEY REALLY SHOULDVE STAGED AN INTERVENTION OR GOT ME ADMITTED TBH. BUT THEY ACTED LIKE EVERYRHING WAS NORMAL AND PERFECTLY FUNE. I DO NOT MISS THEM. I DO NOT NEED TO MISS THEM. I SHOULD NOT ROMANTICIZE MY PAST RELATIONSHIPS, BECAUSE THERE WAS NOTHING GOOD ABOUT THEM. THEY ARE SHITBAGS, AND ARENT WORTHY OF ME OVERTHINKING ABOUT THEM. THEY SHOULDVE LOVED ME MORE AND TREATED ME BETTER THAN THEY DID. I KNOW THAT U DONT OWE ANYONE ANYTHING, BUT WHEN SOMEONE IS SUPPOSED TO BE YOUR BESTFRIEND, YOU DEFINITELY OWE THEM LOVE AND ATTENTION. I AM NOT BEING WHINY OR OVERDRAMATIC OR ANYTHING OF THAT MATTER FOR THINKING THESE THINGS OR BEING SAD ABOUT THEM, BECAUSE IT WAS A VERY SAD AND HORRIBLE STAGE IN MY LIFE FUCK YOU BRENNA LAMM. FUCK YOU KAYLEE NEUMANN. AND ESPECIALLY FUCK YOU TO ALIVIA FUCKING MISKOVIC YOU STUPID SACK OF SHIT. FUCK YOU TO BAILEY BARBER, YOU DESPICABLE DEMON BITCH. YOU DOG FACED SNOT RAG OF A SLUG OF A SORRY CUNT OF A SHIT STAIN OF A PERSON. THAT GOES FOR EVERY GODDAMN PERSON AT HAMILTON. I HOPE YOU ALL FUCKING CHOKE TO DEATH AND DIE YOU STUPID SCUM RAT BITCHES. I PRAY TO ALL THAT US HOLY THAT ONE DAY YOU WILL FEEL A FRACTION IF THE MISERY YOU CAUSED ME AND THE PERMANENT ISSUES YOU INFLICTED ON MY MENTAL HEALTH. GO SUCK ON SATANS COCK YOU SORRY FAGGOT BITFHES CUZ WHEN YOU DIE HES GONNA BE YOUR DADDY. BITCHASS CUM RAGS!!! god this is therapeutic to imagine spitting this shit in their faces. IM GONNA FUCK ALL OF UR MORHERS AND GET THEM TO FALL IN L

[angelicmichael]

Since you are an angst queen I know you’d make magic out of anything on the list, but how about number 9 with Michael?

A/N: First of all that’s a huge compliment thank you 😭🥺 I hope you like this!! I’m sorry it’s so long for a blurb lol. if u want a song that describes this fic PERFECTLY then listen to flesh without blood by grimes!! Like, I didn’t even mean too but the song matches this fic so perfectly. Anyway enjoy ♥️ Reblogs and likes are greatly appreciated :)

Warnings: breaking up, MAJOR character(s) death - the death isn’t really described but it’s suggested at the end of the fic, Reader burns herself so I guess burning? Lol, it’s not really suicide but Reader knows about her death and accepts it so it could be considered as such? Idk.

You never thought it would come to this.

Even from the beginning you knew he was trouble. He was too beautiful; to perfect.. He had to be corrupt in some way. And he sure was.

However nothing could prepare you to handle the fact that he was the antichrist, satans son. At first you laughed it off and thought he was trying to be funny but it was clear to you it wasn’t a joke when he told you about the bombs.

As fucked up as it sounds, you were okay with it. As long as you were by his side, you would be okay. However; as the date of the nuclear attack grew closer and closer, you started to second thoughts. You had second thoughts about everything but mostly about dating Michael.

He was starting to draw away from you, which was understandable since he was getting so busy. However in the moments when he happened to be free and tried to reach out to you, you found yourself withdrawing from him as well.

Knowing what destruction he was capable of, and what he was planning on doing made you start to withdraw from him.

What the fuck were you even thinking with dating this guy in the first place? How could there ever be a happy ending with the antichrist?

Long story short you now were in a fucking predicament, to say the least.

The bombs went off tommorow. you knew that. Michael knew that, and so did the cooperative. That was everyone who knew and who was okay with the world fucking ending. You couldn’t fucking handle it anymore.

You were tired of feeling like the responsibility of the world was in your hands, and you were tired of tolerating Michaels shit.

You loved him, and him alone. As much as it hurt to admit it, the thing that turned you off so much about Michael was all the fucking baggage he carried. You wanted him, not the cooperative, not his fucking magic powers, not his fucked up family, and espically not his fucking urge to destroy everything he touched. You knew all of that wasn’t truly him, it wasn’t his spirit.

It was the satanists and Satan himself that made Michael so fucking sadistic. And you hated it. You started to hate him for letting this happen, for allowing himself to surrender to such darkness.

You and Michael were due to leave at the crack of dawn to go to the sanctuary, before the bombs hit but you had different ideas. You were leaving tonight. As soon as you finished writing him this damn letter.

It was nighttime and you were alone in you and Michaels shared home. Or.. really just Michaels home now. You knew you had to write this letter soon before he came back, you had already packed everything and you had a hotel set up - waiting for you. You already had all of your belongings in boxes and ready to go by the front door, but right now you were still fucking stumped.

You sat at Michaels desk that he used for work; with a peice of blank paper in front of you with a pen in your hand.

You twiddled the pen nervously; trying to think of what you even wanted to say to him.

You kept the light dim, just enough so that you could see what you wanted to write. Having the light on brightly seemed to just make you sweat and make you even more nervous for some odd reason.

You finally bit the bullet and decided to just fucking do it, you started writing.

‘Dearest Michael,

I hope this letter finds you well. I know you hate unpredictability but I had to do this, this way. I know that if I looked you in the eyes and told you that I had to leave you - that I wouldn’t be able to take it so.. I’m sorry Michael. I’m so fucking sorry. It’s not that I don’t love you, because I do. I love you so fucking much. Too much to see you live the rest of your life like this, controlled by the Cooperative and being manipulated like that. I mean, think about it Michael. REALLY think. Do you really want to live the rest of your life having to manage of all them? Having to be dictated by fucking Satan for ‘probably’ eternity? I don’t want a future like that Michael. I would rather be taken out tommorow quickly by the bombs than live the rest of my life in a fucking wasteland. Understand that I love you but not the situation. I packed everything and I’m leaving tonight; please don’t try to find me. I just want to spend the little remaining hours I have alone please. I know how excited you were for tommorow and I’m sorry that you’ll have to celebrate alone -“.

You stopped writing for a second. You really were a fucking idiot, weren’t you? How god damn naive have you been? Michaels been spending more time at the fucking cooperative than he had at home, of course he wasn’t alone. That made no sense.

You wouldn’t be surprised if he was fucking some random cooperative member; Michael was gorgeous - everyone wanted him. You shook your head, I mean there was no point to not call him out on it. You could basically say whatever you wanted now - you were going to die tommorow anyways. You focused back on the paper in front of you and continued writing.

‘but im sure you’ll just find some bitch to fuck and celebrate that way, won’t you?

Yours truly,

(Y/n)’.

You put the pen back where you had previously found it and took the letter in your hands. You reread your mini speech and you felt odd.

You didn’t feel quite sad, but you weren’t happy either. You supposed you were kind of relieved. Relieved to finally have told Michael what you always wanted too. Relieved you didn’t have to date some sadistic, cruel man forever.

You turned the corner in the house and opened the door that lead to the bedroom. You had made the bed and you put the letter in the middle right below the pillows, no way he could fucking miss it.

You let out a dry laugh - not because anything was funny but out of disbelief. You were actually doing it. You were really leaving Michael.

You turned on your heel and with a snap of your fingers the lights turned off. It was now time to get the fuck out of here.

——————————

It was a beautiful day. The sun shone brightly onto you as you basked in it. It was early morning, the next day and you sat in a metal chair outside of a cafe with a coffee in front of you.

Today was the day.

You didn’t know the exact time the bombs were due to go off but you knew it was sometime before noon, and it was nearing 8 am.

You expected to get hundred of phone calls last night or to even have Michael show up at your hotel but none of that happened.. And you would be lying if you said that didn’t disappoint you a little. You did miss him.

You took a sip of coffee, savoring the taste before swallowing it. You picked up the cup - getting ready to raise it to your lips when you heard the other metal chair that was across the table from you being pulled back. The sound of metal across the concrete was like nails on chalkboard - you jumped and a good portion of your hot coffee slid down your shirt.

You bolted out of the chair - trying to go to the bathroom so you could dry yourself off but instead you felt a firm hand grab your wrist.

“Wait”. The tone of the voice you heard was soft yet demanding; so you listened. Also the voice was way too fucking familiar, you knew it belonged to a male due to the deep tone of it. With a quick look, it confirmed your suspicions. It was fucking Michael.

You stood there shaking, your chest was on fucking fire - stinging. Tears brimmed your eyes as you tried to get your wrist back but Michael held onto it even tighter.

“Michael! I need to go-“ You quickly pleaded.

“No, you don’t”. Michael snarled. You looked into his eyes you noticed how he had tears in his eyes, too. You stood there for a moment, in pain and being insanely uncomfterable in the hot sun that seemed to amplify the pain of your new burn. It was almost as if he enjoyed your suffering, like some kind of subtle revenge for you leaving him last night.

After getting a couple of weird looks, Michael sheepishly let your wrist go and allowed you to move just enough so you could sit across from him at the table.

You sniffled and brushed the tears off of your cheeks with the back of your hand.

“I told you not to find me, Michael”. You said in a deeper tone than of which you normally spoke in. It was because of how emotional you were starting to become, did he really come back for you?

“(Y/n), what’s gotten into you? Do you think I chose you over the Cooperative or something”? Michael spoke, gently shaking his head as he did so.

You were on the edge of your seat (literally) as you quickly replied, speaking so fast you barely even comprehended or really thought about what you were saying.

“You did Michael! These past couple of weeks I’ve barely been able to see you. You won’t talk to me, we don’t communicate anymore”.

You said, screaming. Any care you had of anyone around you hearing you scream at Michael seemed to become nonexistent. Tears fully streamed down your face now - a mix of anger and sadness. Your fingers gripped the table, turning white. You didn’t even flinch when Michael slammed a peice of paper onto the table.

“Is this what you think of me? Is this how low you think of me now? I’ve been beyond busy making plans not just for me but for us, to wipe out the human race and create a clean slate where we can create any kind of world we wish. But.. Instead.. you think I’m out fucking other girls”? Michael spoke harshly, continuing to stare into your eyes.

You sniffled, and tried to pull yourself together before you spoke again and gave a weak smile. You knew your accusation of him cheating was hollow, there really was no proof of him doing so. It was just a product of you being stressed and paranoid. The smile you gave him wasn’t really whole hearted, admittedly but you were done screaming and fighting.

The most important thing was that you had him back, and that the bombs were still due to go off most likely.

“I’m so sorry I said that Michael. I was just emotional. I didn’t mean that, I promise.. but.. today’s.. the day-“

You spoke slowly, not wanting to admit what today’s big event actually was but Michael cut you off anyway.

“You really think I wouldn’t cancel today’s event, Angel? I managed to postpone it. The cooperative wasn’t happy but I needed to see you. This whole thing isn’t worth it if your not by my side”.

You furrowed your eyebrows together, did Michael not get the point of your letter? You didn’t leave just for him to continue on with his plans. The idea was sweet but you didn’t exactly understand his motive and that made you uncomfterable.

You shifted and opened your mouth to speak when your eardrums nearly shattered with the loud noise that seemed to suddenly fill the air. It was fucking sirens. What the fuck??

You didn’t know what to do. You felt adrenaline start to course through your veins and you could only scream,

“What the fuck Michael”?!

You don’t know what scared you more, the sirens or the look on Michaels face. He looked horrified. He leaped out of the metal chair so swiftly you barely even saw him get up, his mouth was open - like he wanted to say something.

You stood up too, nearly shouting at him so that he could hear you through the sirens.

“Michael? ...

Michael?! ..

MICHAEL”!

Finally he seemed to snap out of it and realize you were still there, in front of him. You could see he was breathing hard, he was starting to panic. He came up to you and quickly embraced you.. it was as if he could almost smell your fear.

“Look, there’s nothing to worry about. It was probably just a miscommunication error, I just need to call-“

Michaels voice stayed smooth and steady as he talked but you knew him. You knew by the look in his eyes, the way he was holding onto you (he rarely EVER got clingy) that he was scared as hell.

You also knew you two didn’t have a lot of time. You knew how the nuclear attack was designed that after the alarms went off there would only be a couple minutes before the actual bombs released. You cut him off and started talking.

“-No, Michael. We don’t have time”. You said, your voice cracking. Another tear slid down your cheek as you kissed Michael with more passion than you probably ever had in your history of dating men.

You felt as if your body was on fire with the knowledge of what your future held, as you heard screams and chaos from every angle around you two.

You couldn’t help but selfishly think that atleast you had Michael and that you wouldn’t be alone now.

Taglist: @mina672 @9layerdevilsfoodcake @michaellangdonstanaccount @guiltyfiend @jimmason @langdonsexual

[ruewrites]

I spent ten whole minutes writing a fucking essay in tags and because I use dumb fucking mobile it crashed and DELETED MY WHOLE BREAKDOWN OF YOUR FIC AND WHY ITS THE BEST IVE EVER READ. Anyways, now I’m writing you an essay in notes as to why you’re the best fic writer and im gonna try cram it Into your inbox, i just need to talk Abt how great it is and I want you to know how great you are

I wanna talk about your character building. It’s amazing, it’s beyond that, it’s perfect. At no point did I feel like it was fake or exaggerated. I particularly loved Lucifers story and character and I really feel like you did him justice, even from the very first chapter when he was caring for a tiny little asmo in the park Right the way through to the wedding,, outstanding, honestly. Not to mention his and Diavolo’s relationship, it was love,y to see what where essentially background characters have their own arcs too, y’know? Felt so real. Mammon and Levi, I LOVE the two of them and the sibling dynamic you portrayed was flawless, one of my favourite scenes was the Stake out for the admirer in the car? The arguing and back and forth was honestly hilarious and I honest to god was laughing, bit to mention the part when mammon raids asmos room and finds the letters? I was so nervous but so excited, I loved seeing protective but loving older brother dynamics. (The phone call where Levi demands asmo says over will never not be funny). One of my favourite relationships was the one between asmo and satan, seeing how the two of them were closer and especially the part where asmo visits Satan and they just gossip? It was so sweet honestly it was actually heartwarming, even if Satan threatened to punt a child. Seeing Satan support asmo all the way through was one of my favourite parts, you made every character so lovable it’s insane, and I haven’t even MENTIONED the main relationship!!

Solomon and Asmos developing relationship from when they first met, to the main story to the end is honestly so satisfying, even if waiting for the next chapter was stressful at times (I Hope you know exactly which Time I meant. You really left asmo in the bathroom crying and thought that I WOULDNT be distraught? I had to spend all week thinking about that everytime I saw asmos face, I was CRUSHED. made the ending so satisfying though). The whole concept of these anonymous letters which are designed around what Solomon just knows will make asmo happy is honestly so sweet and the fact that he worked so hard to give them to him without him knowing and had his roommate write them is,, insane but in all the best ways, exactly how I imagine Solomon would be, you did him so good. Infact let’s take a Minute, not to talk about your amazing fic, but about your amazing LETTERS, I mean, hello? What are you? Some kind of bored god whose decided to bless us? Each and everyone of them was gorgeous. You write POV so well too, whilst never getting like, too bogged down by any particular aspect. I particularly loved the small things, like Solomon knowing the coffee orders amd Asmo ‚accidentally‘ designing everything to suit Solomon.

Sorry for not sending this sooner, I deadass dreamt that I sent it and then found it unfinished in my notes. Anyways, wanted to let you know you’re my fave writer and I would die for you. That is all. Happy holidays! P.S i have NO idea how to fix the strange way my tumblr formats asks, I apologise. I wanted to send this anon because I don’t know how ok it is to send a short essay of thanks to fic writers but I really dunno how many ppl you have that fucking bother you with every update, I just love your writing a lot. Thankyou!!

First of all, thank you so incredibly much. Like, I love this a lot a lot. All of this is so incredibly sweet of you to say and every now and again I go back to read it because ahh???? I just enjoyed writing WBT and I didn’t think that people would actually enjoy reading it, even now that concept is just so mind boggling to me. I know I’ll be going back and rereading this for a while to come now. It just makes me so happy. Thank you.

If I’m being honest, I felt super worried about writing those dynamics, especially when it came to the brothers and other side characters. Honestly the stakeout scene in the car was one of my favorite scenes to write with the brothers. I wanted to throw in a little bit of familial comedy. I was hoping it would come across as funny, so I’m happy to hear that it did! I’m also happy you enjoyed the ‘Over’ bit. I’m also happy you enjoyed the sweeter moments of the sibling relationships. Sibling dynamics are complicated, but in the end, they’ll always be there for each other.

Ahah, yeaaaaaah. I knew it would hurt, and honestly I felt a little bad about leaving you guys hanging like that, but I made sure I didn’t leave you there. The pacing was another thing I had initially been worried about, so I’m happy that that also came across well. Solomon is a bit of an odd one isn’t he? But he’s odd in the best ways. Oh the letters, sometimes it took me a while to come up with them. I wanted to make sure they sounded sweet, but I was worried about them not being great. Just hearing that people liked all of these things makes my brain stop? Like it never fails to shock me that people genuinely liked this. Your kind words make me blush (0////0). Thank you so much! Like I genuinely wish I could say more, this is just so kind.

No need to apologize! I really enjoyed this! I put a smile on my face. The first time I read this I teared up a little, and I’m tearing up again now. I can promise you that I belive that fic writiers 100% appreciate this like this. Knowing that other people enjoyed something that I really enjoyed writing makes me feel so warm on the inside. People don’t really bother me, and I certainly don’t consider contact a bother :3. This is so incredibly sweet and I love it so much. I can’t even begin to express my gratitude. Thank you so incredibly much. Like, thank you. I hope I can continue to bring you more joy in the future. I wish I could express how much I genuinely love this. Thank you.I love this, and I’m so happy you loved WBT.

[sleepypeaky]

{getaway} pt. 3

Reader is the Blinder’s chauffeur….naturally that entails getaway driving too

Part 3/4 ———-part 1, part 2

also this was unintentional but the reader is gender neutral

WC: 1,209

Warnings: Shooting, blood mention

A/n: set just after season 5, like from the middle of the last episode.

also yes this is far fetched, but its because i have short-attention-span-and-it-needs-to-fit-in-4-chapters disease.

and no this isnt historically accurate obvs but i had to do it to write the fucking thing

tnis is so fun to write so try and stop me. this is kind of a Finn x reader?? idk?? finn is my wife?? but he also smol gay boi?? im confused.

1929

“FINN!”

You ran through small heath.

The dawn light barely came through the thick grey clouds. The morning was just an extended night.

The darkness had only begun to form.

____

You sat in the dark in your car behind the building. It was understood what would happen tonight. And you understood your place in what was about to happen. At some point you would hear a roar, and a group of blinders would come out the back doors, get into the car, and you would drive away.

It was that simple.

Only it wasn’t. Because thats not what happened.

There was no roar. Instead, Johnny Dogs stumbled out the doors alone, something happened, he said, i dont know what but something happened. 

Aberama was dead. There was a mole. Your orders were changed.

No one had seen Finn.

______

“FINN!”

You had looked all night. Your coat was damp from the fog and dampness of the city combined. You ran down to Charlie’s yard, pushing through the thick white haze of mist and coal smoke that was exacerbated by the Cut. 

You trampled the soggy hay and seed that led up to Curly’s stables. 

“Finn?!” You called one last time.

His figure stood up from the corner. There was no illumination in the building. You made out his features by the tonal gray of the outside light.

You trod over and slapped him in the face.

“Finn jesus fucking christ where have you been!?” Anger seethed from every pore as you stared him down.

But there was no defiance in his eyes. 

“I think it was me.” He whispered.

You furrowed your eyebrows, urging him to explain what he was talking about.

He took a shaky breath,

“Bill is gone, i gave him money and he left it, hes gone and he knew.”

Your eyes widened. Fuck.

Finn suddenly looked very very pale. Ghostly pale and afraid.

“oh god.” He stared wide eyed into space, his eyes seemed glassy.

Shit, you thought, this was bad. Really bad. Granted his brothers were the ones to blame: for trusting Finn with someone that could have possibly become, or had always been, a spy. Nevertheless, this was bad for Finn. 

He sat down heavily. You could only imagine the things he was thinking. Two men were dead. Tommy was in shambles. 

You both sat there for a long time. In the dark. 

“What now?” You whispered.

There was a long pause, followed by a deep inhale of smoky air. 

Finn stood up. 

“This was my fault, now i have to fix it.”

And he walked past you and out the stable doors.

You shot up,

“Finn, what?!”

You chased after him. 

He walked swiftly up the road, up to the car, and got in the drivers seat. He turned on the engine. You cursed yourself for teaching such a stubborn mule to drive. 

“Finn get out of the fucking car and think for once in you life!” You yelled through the window.

He turned to you and in an instant you see all his thoughts and fears in his eyes. You saw all the years of reliance on his brothers. You saw all the regret of not being able to protect his family like they could. You knew that this was bigger than this one mistake.

You clenched your jaw.

“Fine. I’ll help. But i have 2 conditions; one, we need at least a rough plan, and two, you let me drive.”

A smile peaked through all the other emotions on his face for a moment. Then he slid across the seat and you got into the car. 

___

“Do we know he’s here?”

You sat in the dark car on a dim street, across from Mosley’s office building. 

“Tommy says he comes here everyday.” Finn replied. 

This did not ease your question.

You skimmed the building with your eyes. The windows were too high up to jump from, and there were no ledges on which to climb. Either he would have to go inside, or wait for Mosley to come out.

It was raining harder now, which might turn out useful to you as a cover. 

“This is fucking insane.” You muttered. “We have no plan, its just the two of us, and we are about to assassinate a member of parliament!”

Finn didn’t seem fazed by your words.

“Tommy had a fucking plan and look what happened, so why not just go for it. And having it just be the two of us is good, no moles.”

He was right, however much you still wanted to believe otherwise.

The things you did know were that you couldn’t get too close: Mosley knew you were Tommy’s chauffeur, and would probably recognize Finn. And you knew that he was probably armed, or had a personal guard.

“Finn, how good is your aim?”

He shrugged,

“pretty good.”

“Pretty good? Finn this isn’t a carnival this needs to work!”

“I’ll get out of the car then! Trust me, i can do this.”

“I still don’t trust you but i swear to god, satan, and everything in between: if you get me or yourself killed i will kill you.”

___

“Where’s Finn!?!” Ada yelled as she kicked open the door to Tommy’s study.

Tommy was at his desk with his head down. Arthur ventured to answer,

“We haven’t seen him since the speech. Johnny Dogs said (y/n) went to look for him.”

“Arthur that was 12 hours ago! They could be hurt!”

RING

Tommy raised his head and grabbed the phone.

“What?”

He eyes widened.

He slammed the phone back down on the receiver, and scrambled to his feet.

“Mosley’s been shot.”

“Oh my god.” Ada gasped.

They all ran out the door.

_________

Mosley stepped out onto the rain slicked sidewalk. His protection, he hadn’t bothered learning the man’s name, stood beside him. They had left the office to go to one of the many gentleman’s lounges that Mosley frequented. But as they began to walk, a young man stepped out before them.

Mosley recognized him,

“You’re a peaky boy are you not?”

The boy looked up,

“Yes sir, I have an urgent message from Mr. Shelby.”

Mosley perked his ears,

“Yes?”

Finn tore his pistol out of his pocket and shot Mosley directly in the forehead. But the guard had readied his weapon when he first saw Finn step out into the path, and he was ready.

____

A firework of red blood exploded from Mosley’s head and was quickly washed down by the rain. 

His body collapsed to the ground.

But before you could rejoice, 2 more shots pierced the air.

Fuck

You screeched the car up to the path just as Finn stumbled to the car.

He threw open the door and fell into the passenger seat.

“Go!” He croaked.

You did, knowing people would come to investigate the shots.

The street had been clear due to the weather, thank god.

You didn’t take your eyes off the road until you felt you were out of harms way.

“You did it!” You shouted, turning to Finn.

You went pale.

Finn was slumped in the seat, hand clutched over his stomach.

Blood gushed through his fingers.

His eyes were closed.

_______

[ughthatimagineblog]

sins of the earth

lucifer morningstar x reader | i

warnings; mentions of murder, death?, drinking, lots of drinking, weird past stuff, nothing too bad, if you’re able to watch the show without any triggers then you should be good

word count; 1735

prompt; your entire life you believed in the paranormal, you grew up christian but something pulled inside of you to believe there was more and for so long you wanted to find it. but when life hits you hard and you lose faith, you come to the conclusion that reality is as everyone said it was, boring and most things are a lie. and you believe this new ‘truth’ until a man claiming hes the devil comes into your life and threatens to make you relearn everything you thought you knew. again.

a/n; this is gonna be a series since i started watching lucifer and im not even into the second season and i already want tom ellis to impregnate me (if he happens to ever read that; i am sorry) anyways i literally shit this out on the first night of 2019. i just had a sentence in mind and then i ran with that and made a prompt out of it. that was my inspiration. a real life problem plus a sentence i thought i might say one day made this fic. anyways, i hope this is pretty good. it will get better. honestly im lowkey proud of this one tho. unedited but i think this has been some of my best writing. to those who have requested stuff i haven’t made: im sorry im depressed. 

Your fist slammed onto the bar harder than you were expecting, or wanting, it to. You mumbled your request for whatever number of drink this was for the night and immediately began to rub the soreness of your ulnar border away while the bartender went to work in making your drink.

      The club was pounding with noise and shaking with bodies and it was humorous to think it matched the pounding of your head. You knew you should stop. But it was your birthday and you were spending it alone, miles from home, and freshly heartbroken. You didn’t care you had a headache and the drinking would make it worse. In fact, you came to this nightclub in hopes that you would drink so much it would make it better.

     Drink until you couldn’t feel anything at all. You already made arrangements for a cab to pick you up at one a.m and instructed a female bartender to remind you, even tipping her generously to go as far as walk you out when it arrived.

     Her name started with an M. Or was it an N? You weren’t entirely sure and you groaned, beginning to stand up as the man behind the bar passed you your drink. In doing so, you felt the rush of your previous drinks all at once. The room was dizzy and you felt light and unstable but also very tired.

     Remembering the time when alcohol made you bubbly and carefree and happy made you horribly sad now. In actuality you were sad. Your entire life had been working towards a half assed dream you thought would make you happy. When you got the job of that half assed dream you packed your things and left everything you’d once known behind, including family. They don’t visit because they don’t have the money too. And thinking of family, you didn’t even pick a career you would have been fantastic in because you wanted a family yourself. You let children ruin your life before you even had any. Children or a life. The person you thought you’d marry turned out to be a complete asshole and you’d had enough. Dreams and spirit crushed, you, at this moment accepted your fate. Die alone. Be bitter.

     But that wasn’t it. There was a war going on inside you that told you to give up but another didn’t. A side that told you you weren’t strong enough but another that reminded you of how strong your mother was. A side that told you your past self would frown and cry at the sight of you now, but the other; that your past self would tell you it’s okay to get up and make the best of things.

     The thoughts that rushed your mind spilled onto your cheeks and you gulped down the drink you just ordered, hearing your grandmother’s voice in the back of your mind. “Remember to sip. Don’t gulp.” She would tell you when she was teaching you to ‘properly drink’. You scoffed out loud, giving the bartender enough money to last the night. He passed you the bottle. “Yeah well you’re not here, are you, grandma?” You muttered to yourself before taking a long swig.

     “I feel like if she would be, she’d have a heart attack in this bloody place.” A suave voice cut through the music and chatter. Surprised, you coughed, spilling a bit on your shirt. “Jesus Christ.” You managed to get out. “Quite the opposite actually,” You turned to find a man who embodied the phrase ‘tall, dark, and handsome’. His raven eyes raked you and your body shamelessly. “Lucifer Morningstar.”

     You openly rolled your eyes. It was a gut reaction but since you couldn’t feel your nose if you tried to itch it at this point in the night, you couldn't quite control your reactions at the moment. “You couldn’t have chosen a better name than that?” You asked, your face plastered with a look of disdain and disgust. Lucifer looked taken aback but nonetheless, didn’t drop the haughty facade.

      “I didn’t choose the name.” He stated, you laughed a little. “Oh yeah? Then who did? Nameberry dot com?” You took another swig of the bottle. “My father actually, though I would like to meet this Nameberry person.” He smiled and you peered up at him through narrowed eyes. You gave him a once over. A twice over. Then finally, “It’s a website, but no, really, who are you?” You asked. “I’m the devil. Lucifer Morningstar. If you don’t believe me I have ways of proving it.” You rolled your eyes at this.

     “Not my religion.”

“You’re not a believer?” He inquired. Understanding he meant the Christian kind, you shook your head. “Not anymore.”

     “So you don’t believe in hell?” He asked and it earned him an odd look. Such odd questions from a weirdly unique stranger.

     “If I did, that would juxtapose what I just said, wouldn’t it? I used to. Now I don’t really care where I go.” You were growing bored of this man. It was clear that he had an ego the size of Russia and based on the look of him that was because he hadn’t ever had a girl say ‘no’ to him before. This ‘Lucifer Morningstar’ was in for a rude awakening.

     Meanwhile, he was growing more and more interested in you. “Ah, no desire to end up anywhere in the afterlife? I’m sure you have some desires here, don’t you?” He asked, voice getting smoother, tone dropped just enough to ring some red alarms in your head. This time, you were able to hid the grin.

     You put on a dazed look, nonchalantly setting your bottle aside as you stepped closer to Lucifer. You ran a hand over his chest and watched as his damning smile grew in amusement. “Actually, my strongest desire. . .” You trailed off and gave him a once over once more. Lucifer could barely contain his excitement. “Is for you to stop asking me these weird fucking questions and leave me alone.” Your voice transitioned from sultry to bored so smoothly you thought your tongue was made of silk. Lucifer didn’t even realize what had happened until the fake smile dropped from your lips and you stepped away.

     “Wait, what?”

“You heard me, Lucifer Morningstar.” You mocked his name, turning from him fully and you began to walk away, grabbing your bottle on the way out. The conversation with him was both sobering and a great way to intensify your headache.

      Lucifer felt frozen where he stood as he watched you walk away. You had been playing him. His, well, charm didn’t work on you. It was all jarring and exciting and concerning and exhilarating for him. Finally, he snapped out of his daze as you mocked his name.

    “Wait!” He called after you, reaching for your arm and turning you around. You yanked free of his touch. “Don’t touch me, creep.” You spat back at him. That flicker of annoyance. If he were mortal, he realized, that would have hurt. This confused him more.

     “I’m not a creep, i’m the devil!” He exclaimed back at you. “Would you quit with that?” You nearly were yelling now. “You’re human! Just like that guy and just like me. If you’re so convinced you’re not, you need to see a shrink. There is no such thing as fairy tales.” You shoved a business card you had been digging around for into his chest.

    Lucifer scoffed as he felt the small weight of your hands against your chest again, if only for a moment. “But I’m not-“ He started but you glared at him.

     “I did not come here for this. It’s one in the morning, my taxi is here.” You noticed the girl you tipped earlier already on her way to come get you from across the room. “You wore off my drunk. I’ll be chugging this in the rest of the car, wishing I had went to a different bar for my birthday. Oh, and I won’t be coming back. Not if you’re here.” You huffed out right as the girl who’s name you forgot approached you and she began to lead you out as promised.

     You shocked yourself just then. You had promised yourself to be more honest and that was the first time you really had. You had spent most of your life, even adult life, thinking demons and fairies and ghosts and ghouls and goblins were real. But you got the help you needed and now you didn’t so when that guy began to talk about being Lucifer and Satan and the devil, it scared you. But you meant what you said. That guy was insane and if he went to that club, you weren’t coming back. You supposed some of his questions were casual, but something about him felt, off.

    Your birthday. Whoever you were. Lucifer was still clutching the business card in his hands, still hovering above where his heart would be as he watched you leave. You were different. You didn’t believe him. You didn’t care to. You thought he was clinically insane, like a murderer who thought he was God, or well, the devil. You didn’t say it but he saw it in your eyes. Not that you were afraid of him, but you knew he was different and you couldn’t tell what.

   But that’s the thing, if he thought about it, is that you knew what he was. And you weren’t afraid but instead your automatic response was to get him help. Not that you knew what he really was, but a part of you recognized it even without your conscious knowing. Your consciousness just didn’t want to know.

    It felt like hours before he pulled his hands from his chest and gazed down at the numbers on the paper. Tonight was a night, well morning, was a morning of firsts apparently, because for the first time, Lucifer called later that day and made an appointment with the shrink you recommended. You promised you wouldn’t come back to that club, but he wasn’t ready to let go of you just yet.

     He chuckled to himself at his plan. Yes, it did sound as though was was a murderer. Insane and obsessive. But he was in fact the devil, and there are no consequences for the sins of the Earth.

[jcmorgenstern]

Lilith said Lucifer gifted the Morningstar sword to "the first Morgenstern." Why the HELL would Satan give a demon-summoning sword to a Shadowhunter? Did he know that the Morgenstern men were gonna be psycho so he was like "hey buddy, keep this for future reference in case you want to start some shit!" I just. Someone please explain.

“hey buddy, keep this for future reference in case you want to start some shit!”gasdjfhghghg

tbh I’m not 100% sure whether to believe lilith (or jonathan’s recount of lilith) because like…what she says doesn’t even remotely match up with the timeline. Apparently jonathan learns about clary when she blasts a demon “with sunlight out of her palm” and….that doesn’t happen until 2a, at the earliest. that gives jonathan about a week to mobilize his dumb ass outta hell, lose all his skin, kidnap sebastian in paris, move to new york, rent an apartment in new york (probably the least realistic part of this sequence), steal the mortal instruments…that’s fucking INSANE.

I also already pick major beef with the whole Michael/Lucifer thing because….I took a whole-ass Milton course last sem and there is NOTHING to support any sort of connection. It’s as weird as if Jace had gone “hey remember that part of Winnie the Pooh where Rabbit and Tigger are bound inextricably and Tigger stabs Rabbit with a sword…..and the sword is still out there.”

The only thing I can think of is that PL (book II if memory serves) mentions that even after his fall, Lucifer still wears his angelic armor (and, I assume, bears angelic arms), so it kind of makes sense that an edgy thot family like the Moon Moon of Lucifers would latch onto that kind of relic. Like, it’s angelic…..but dark themed. (plot twist: the morningstar sword is iOS mojave. it would probably make about as much sense than whatever’s going on with Glorious at this point)

this might be wrong but I’m also confused why they invented the Morningstar sword when in the books the sword Jonathan uses to summon demons in COG is Phaesophoros? Ok now that I type it out I think I see why they changed the name. If I thought people trying to say “ignis calestis” was bad, I can’t imagine what they’d do to ancient greek. still, referring to it as both the “morningstar sword” AND the “morgenstern sword” is really confusing even to me, and I obviously pay a lot of attention to that part of the plot

honestly tho im genuinely lost as to what jonathan would even want to do with the sword??? start the second demon french revolution and guillotine the clave with his bug demon buddies??? wear it to a club because it makes him look cool?? What alliance would he even have with them? He clearly had no problem killing off poor middle-class Mirek. (side note: jonathan really is single-handedly killing off the entire antique collector population of the shadow world, isn’t he? is this his fetish? someone help him) Also we literally don’t even know how Val summoned lilith in the first place (maybe the sword?)

sorry this is. very rambly.

personally my new theory is that lucifer got tired of the sword and yeeted it into idris with a message that said “for the edgiest” on it and after centuries of squabbling the morgensterns ended up with it, by virtue of having the edgiest names (and having killed the competition), but what the fuck do i know

so basically “keep this for future reference in case you want to start some shit”

[fokrot27]

THE TRUTH ABOUT ZHEANI

Dear DA fans

Kim Posibill here...

After this girl, Zheani Sparks recently started spreading insane rumors about DA online, I went to do some digging to find out who she REALLY is.

To anyone that doesn’t know what's going on here, let me bring you up to speed. After Ninja & Yolandi broke up in 2013, Yo-landi got a boyfriend, and Ninja started dating different bitches around the world. During this time Ninja met an Australian psycho fan called Zheani Sparks. After chatting to Zheani online for a while, Ninja invited her to South Africa to come visit him. During her visit, Ninja introduced Zheani to ¥o-landi. During this slightly awkward moment, Zheani asked Yo-landi for a selfie, that Zheani then posted proudly on her IG and Tumblr. Yolandi never saw Zheani again during her little African holiday. Shortly after this Ninja got bored of Zheani, cut her visit short, and flew her home. But he wasn’t a dick about it, and still answered her texts she send him from time to time.

A year or two later when Ninja & Yo-landi went to Australia on tour, Zheani offered to work for them as a tour assistant, bringing them vegan food daily for 2 weeks. During this tour Ninja & Yo-landi noticed that Zheani kept hitting on the other famous rappers backstage. When Ninja & Yo-landi saw Zheani give her phone number to 2Chainz after 10sec of meeting him, it suddenly became super obvious to them that their personal assistant was a star fucker. However they kept it cool, and let her finish bringing them food on tour, then they politely parted ways.

Following this it seems that this girl Zheani lost her fucking mind and became a raging internet hoe. She also attempted to start a rap career. To launch her rap career Zheani came up with a wild story that Ninja & Yo-landi TRAFFICKED her out to Africa, where they TORTURED her during a SATANIC RITUAL of some kind. This was her marketing angle, (and probably a wild fantasy of hers).

I was recently contacted by a loyal DA fan who shed some light on these highly imaginative rumors Zheani is attempting to spread about Die Antwoord. Zheani met this DA fan online after she accepted payment from him for a special live pornographic online service she offered, that involved Zheani performing nude satanic rituals (via snapchat and Skype) that her clients can wank to. This fan told me that he was severely upset about the crazy rumors Zheani is attempting to spread about Die Antwoord, and that he is now embarrassed that he payed for this weird porno service. He asked to please stay anonymous.

HERE IS THE EMAIL HE SENT ME (followed by a shit load of dodgy fuckin VIDEOS, PHOTOS and credits card receipts from Zheani Sparks.)

"I received a direct message on instagram sometime last year from Zheani where she told me about a project she does, she described at as a mix between the occult and pornography. You pay 30 Australian dollars a month to be part of her "inner circle," (a reference to devil worship). This gives you access to her snapchat. Once you are on the snapchat you are welcomed to her inner circle and she sends you two video'd satanic rituals of her exposing herself, masturbating, performing oral sex, posing her hands into devil horns and making exorcist style poses. She then asks you how you feel after watching these because she believes they have magical powers. I told her i felt like I knew her better (tongue in cheek referencing the fact she has no clothes on) and she told me that's correct it was a magical energy exchange well done. This self belief that she has super powers is sad, possibly a result of mental illness, and it's clear she tries to manipulate people myself included with it. I just go along with it because it's effectively all pornography, though she thinks it's something greater. The account is called "Gothotic Ritual," The 30 australian dollars gives you access to the snapchat for a month and you top up again although she give me a free month because she'd been speaking with me before. Although she eventually asked me to tip extra one month because I'd been given a free month. She also tells you as soon as you join she takes payments for individual rituals. 30 dollar basic access includes her sending you private messages on her snapchat story she posts snippets of herself conducting rituals for other individuals personal commissions and her performing various sexual acts with various partners, males and females. The rituals she has sent snippets of have included her making devil horns, bathing herself in what appears to be blood, masturbating with blood, screaming at the top of her lungs in the middle of the ocean naked, projecting satanic symbols on her naked body while she masturbates, and more.

After the snippets of the ritual she performs in the ocean naked screaming, she posted on her story that after that ritual she felt like she could sense presences in her house and seemed very worried by it. This is a tell tale sign of psychosis or schizophrenia..

As of my last payment and tip to her from the beginning of month I have received nothing in return, and she hasn't been on snapchat or responding on instagram at all, so I imagine I'm not the only one who has been robbed of money. She used the money she receives of this snapchat to fund her entire album including the song The Question. I have seen her briefly advertise the service on her instagram stories and then deletes it when she is obviously struggling for money she tries to get more people involved for this pornographic service.

During our porno conversations, I'd also asked her a few times about Die Antwoord, because I had seen photos of them with her on her IG from years ago.

Im a big DA fan and also wanted to know more about the band.

There is a few instances of comments and posts after she got back from south africa in 2013, of her explaining how much a great time she had and she couldn't wait to see the Die Antwoord guys again, (plz see screenshot below)

Anyway, Sheani BLATANTLY told that she was making a song that was designed to HURT Die Antwoord, her exact words were that she was "Invoking a lot of Kali Energy," Kali being the hindu God of War. There was not once a sign that she had or did feel abused or broken regarding any of this. It was more like “LOOK AT ME, LOOK AT WHAT IM DOING, I’M AMAZING AREN'T I?”

While she sat aloof and gulped her massive glass of wine (this blatant egotism that Zheani carries is very obvious after your first few experiences with her, only my polite manners and libido kept me talking to her).

She only mentioned on the magnitude this would create around her MUSICAL work, the backlash and publicity it would create from Die Antwoord, and that she was ready for all that, due to her "Kali Energy,”

[FOR PROOF (PHOTOS AND VIDEOS) CLICK BELOW ]