#it made me sob at 2am the first time i read it | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

uzuikyo · 1 year

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take me by the hand

inspired by this tiktok video that shattered my fucking heart </3 i couldn't stop crying after seeing that video send a therapist

pairing/s : akaza x fem!reader

genre : angst, fluff, smut maybe

warning/s : major character death, mentions of infertility, pregnancy, fingering, shower sex, pregnant sex, childbirth (normal & c-section), stillbirth (the baby suffocated from the umbilical cord wrapped around its neck), self-harm, suicide, everything’s just mostly sad and depressing, ): poor akaza, (pls forgive me if some of my medical knowledge or writing are inaccurate), also it was 2am when i wrote this so if there are some grammar or spelling mistakez, i apologize >.<

wc : 3.3k

ON REPEAT 🔂

🎧 understand x pluto projector (keshi, rex orange county)

“congratulations! we’re all sooo happy for the both of you!” your best friend, mitsuri, had tears forming in her eyes as she gently pulled you in a hug to not squeeze you and the life growing inside of you. you hugged her back, thanking her as you tried calming her down.

you accepted her gift after pulling away from each other, placing it on the table just for all the presents and gifts. you were feeling kind of overwhelmed as you did not expect this many of them.

your husband saw you and felt your anxiousness. “darling,” you hummed, looking at him. “you okay?” akaza had that soft look in his eyes like he always did ever since you two got together. you nod, “just a little overwhelmed is all. i didn’t know it was going to be such a big deal or something.” you chuckled and akaza let out a small smile, placing a hand on the small of your back and rubbed soothing circles on it.

“everything’s going to be fine. i’m going to be beside you. always. i know my soon to be princess needs her mommy and daddy.” he placed a hand on your round belly and kissed your forehead before both of you went on with the celebration.

all of your friends and family attended the baby shower and all of them were very happy for the both of you to be finally having a child of your own after years of babysitting and stealing your sister’s and mitsuri’s kids and after years of trying for one yourselves.

you and akaza always took it slow and patiently ever since your obgyn informed you about having a low percentage of conceiving a child. this, however, did not stop your lovely husband from adoring you and even told you that it doesn’t matter if you were able to give him one. kids or not, he still loved you no matter what and that was enough to make you feel better.

although you do admit that other women who were able to conceive in just a few tries made you feel insecure and jealous. it made you question yours and your husband’s relationship, but akaza always knew how to reassure you and make your mind be at ease. and you loved him even more for that.

you couldn’t ask for a better husband than akaza.

“akaza!” you giddily shouted from the bathroom and your husband was in your sight in a second. “well?” you showed him the result of all the the pregnancy tests. it all read ‘positive’.

“all three of them.” you said, tears forming in your eyes. “akaza…” a sob escaped from your mouth when he picked you up and spun you around. “we’re having a baby!” his blue eyes were filled with excitement and love as he looked at your tear-stained face. “i love you so much, darling.”

akaza put you down and kissed you like the world was ending. you pulled away, resting your forehead on his but you couldn’t stare at him for too long so you buried your face in his chest, uncontrollably sobbing. “thank you for being patient with me-“

“hey, i don’t wanna hear it. i told you, didn’t i? i don’t care as long as i have you with me.” akaza mumbled in your hair, caressing your back. “but right now we have received what we’ve been wanting for a long time. and i thank the gods for that.”

akaza was there with you for every check ups and ultrasound. you remember how smiley he was when he got the very first ultrasound pictures of your baby from the doctor. his smile got wider when the doctor added how healthy your baby was in that moment that you felt like his mouth would tore apart.

first trimester

“babe.”

akaza groaned from the light taps on his shoulder. slowly opening his eyes, he looked at the clock which read 2:48am. “you need anything, darling? is something hurting or bothering you?” his raspy voice indicates how he’s trying to stay awake.

akaza fully opened his eyes and immediately got up when he saw the tears im your eyes. “i’m craving some mangoes. and pickles.” your reply made him think about whether to laugh or curse at himself, but he eventually pulled you closer to him, trying to soothe you by caressing your hair.

“shh, it’s okay. i got you, baby. you’re not bothering me. i told you i would be right beside you, right?”

every midnight and 3am cravings were fully satisfied with a sleepless and tired akaza in the morning. everytime he would get up to buy or prepare your pregnancy cravings, he would make sure you eat well and go back to sleep which leads to him not being able to go back to sleep. although sometimes he does try, cuddling in bed with you and just waiting until he falls back asleep— which sometimes works.

akaza also dealt with your crazy mood swings during the first trimester.

how you would cry over as simple as not being able to fit in your old jeans anymore, or because the whole tub of ice cream that only you ate ran out. or it may also because of a character that died in a movie or series you’re watching.

how you would snap at him over the littlest things. like not holding your hands, or not giving his attention to you immediately, or not being able to answer your calls within the first ring.

and how you would laugh at literally everything. from rengoku saying his famous “umai!” everytime he eats, to mitsuri’s kids running around and trying not to fall face flat on the ground. also, how you laugh at every serious conversations and scenarios you’re in.

lastly, akaza was the most careful as if he was the one pregnant. he did not let you do any straining activities— even exercising or walking around too much! because he knew that this part of the pregnancy stage was the most crucial one.

and you understood that. you didn’t mind his overprotective nature since this was your first child and both of you you did not want anything bad happening to you and the baby.

second trimester

your bump was more visible now and you can kind of feel the additional weight on your body. you started buying more maternity clothes because most of your bottoms won’t even fit your waist anymore.

the little human inside you also started to kick in your womb. you and akaza would always wait for the baby to kick in the morning right after you wake up and whenever you were doing something exciting as you noticed your baby always responds to happy emotions. like when you’re laughing too much or eating your favorite foods.

akaza was still tending to your every needs and cravings. although it wasn’t as bad as the first few weeks of your pregnancy, but the mood swings were still there.

however as the cravings faded, your hormones started to spike up.

“babe- fuck, are you sure you’re okay with this?” akaza tries his best to hold back, but you always pushes him to his limits. “yes, akaza, please. need you right now.” you ran your hands from his naked chest to his lower abdomen, teasing the waistband of his boxers.

his fingers dipped inside your panties, gently sliding over your now wet slit. “already so wet for me, baby?�� you nodded, cheeks flushed as you moaned from the feeling. “please- need to feel you inside me already.”

akaza placed his lips on yours along with the slip of one finger inside you, making you gasp in his mouth. “keep making those noises for me, pretty girl.” he groaned, adding another finger.

“f-fuck, yes-h-haa…” the kiss turned sloppy as his fingers moved faster, his other hand playing with your swollen tits. “look how pretty these tits are. so soft and swollen, hmm-“ you sighed, neck falling back onto the pillow as he sucked on your nipple, his other fingers playing with the other.

“‘m cumming- fuck! a-ah.. akaza-“

akaza curled his fingers inside you, hitting the spot once again as you finally released. your white juices staining the bedsheets as you tried to catch your breath.

“you need help bathing?” you nodded at your husband, smiling sheepishly. “yes please, i can’t clean my legs cuz of my tummy.” you pouted and he chuckled, “alright, ma, i’ll help you. like i always do.” akaza winked at you, and you lightly smacked him on the chest.

with a hand on your elbow and another on your waist, akaza helped you step in the tub, carefully guiding you down to sit as you held your growing tummy.

akaza made sure you were relaxed and settled before letting you go and grabbing the loofah, pouring a good amount of your favorite body wash. you sighed, closing your eyes as he began scrubbing and washing your body— starting with your shoulders and chest area.

"thank you," you mumbled, leaning your head against his chest as he continued on gently scrubbing your tummy and down your legs. "this is the best that i can do since you're doing all the hard work for our baby." he pressed a kiss on the crown of your head.

after your body and hair were all washed up, akaza got you a towel and carefully helped you get out of the tub to dry you. "lotion?" you nodded at your husband's question and he happily grabbed the bottle of lotion and started applying some on your back, softly massaging every area.

it was such an intimate and peaceful feeling. you were looking at him through the mirror as he was doing it and you let out a moan when he started massaging your breasts. "that feels good?" you nodded, letting out a whine when he suddenly pinched your nipples. "akaza!"

"wanna make you feel good.." he hummed, enjoying how you looked so naked and pretty in front of the mirror. akaza sat you down on the vanity and softly kissed you. your hands wrapping around the back of his neck automatically as the feeling between your thighs made you clench them together.

akaza pulled away and started kissing down your neck. his hands making their way back to your tender breasts and kneading them. "akaza.." you moaned, grinding your hips on his as you felt him get harder under his sweatpants.

"i know darling," akaza felt your wetness the moment his fingers touched your aching center. "fuck, already so wet for me." he pushed one finger in, then another, making you gasp. "more, f-fuck- akaza, more!" you moaned, feeling frustrated from how his fingers wasn't enough to satisfy you.

"just need to make sure you'll be okay, baby. fuck-" he continued pushing his fingers in and out of you, making sure you were feeling good but also comfortable in the countertop you were sitting at. he kissed your cheeks when he saw that you were close. "cum f'me, pretty girl."

you let yourself release the knot inside of you as your mouth formed an 'o', holding tight onto akaza's arms as you came. "that's my good girl. i love you so much," he kissed you passionately, and you responded, hands travelling down the band of his sweatpants to pull it down.

akaza helped you take it off and you bit your lip at the sight of his hard cock. "need it inside me, please." akaza hummed, "anything for my pretty girl." you stroked him a few times before lining the tip up your entrance. "let me do all the work, mmkay? don't want you tiring yourself." he gave you a peck and slowly pushed inside your needy entrance.

"ha-aah, s-so good-" you grabbed onto the back of his neck, watching as his whole length entered you with the sound of akaza groaning loudly. "you feel so fucking good." akaza pulled you in for a kiss and started thrusting in and out of your cunt.

both of you were moaning in each others mouths, your fingers grabbing a fistful of his hair and tugging on it everytime akaza pushes deeper inside you, making the man groan. "yes, right there! ah!-" your forehead were on his as your mouth opened into a silent moan.

"are you close, my love?" akaza adjusted his pace, still being gentle as to not strain you too much nor the baby. "yes, mhmm- fuuck!" you cried out, looking at akaza with the most pretty yet lustful eyes. "let it all out darling, cum with me." both of you came, releasing the loudest moans and groans as akaza caught you in his arms before you went limp.

"i love you, my darling."

third trimester

you loathed your third trimester. you felt so heavy and tired. as well as uncomfortable, because of how round you felt. but you kept on telling yourself to stay strong for your baby. that you had a few weeks left before you can welcome her into the world.

akaza always tried his best to help you carry all the weight by holding your tummy whenever your standing up. like when your cooking, or getting ready. "i know this sounds easier said than done, but just two more weeks and we're going to see our baby."

for the last for weeks of your pregnancy, you've been going to the doctor once a week just to make sure everything is set once you give birth and that the baby is healthy.

you've also been staying inside more since you mostly felt like shit. all the weight on your tummy makes your body hurts, especially your back and waist. thankfully, your husband is there to give you a massage whenever you need one.

"i look like a ball," you pouted, talking to yourself as you were observing yourself in the mirror. akaza looked at you from his office chair at home, and smiled. "no you don't, you look like a strong, pregnant woman to me."

you frowned at him. "you're not the one carrying a whole human in him, are you?" he chuckled, raising both arms to accept defeat.

"you're ready to push, you're at 10cm already." the doctor alerted all the nurses as they began setting up the room for you and your baby once she comes out to the world. "is dad going to be with you during the whole birth?" the doctor asked, and you felt akaza hold your hand. "yes."

"okay momma, i need you to push in one, two, three!"

everything got so blurry after that. you could hear akaza telling you soothing phrases while the doctor was telling you to push and be strong. you were screaming, crying, and pushing for what felt like forever until you heard the doctor say, "i've got the head!"

you were so tired and exhausted that you didn't even realize that everyone was acting so frantically. the nurses were running everywhere, and the doctor was shouting things you couldn't comprehend although you heard the word "suffocating".

akaza was told to wait outside, and eventhough he was confused and nervous, he did what he was told to do for the sake of you and the baby.

you woke up in a different room from the one you were in earlier. the fatigue was still in your system, but you were eager to see your baby, so you tried sitting up only to feel a shooting pain in your lower abdomen.

akaza immediately stood up when he noticed you moving. your brows furrowed when you noticed his swollen, red eyes, and his overall dishveled state. "how's the baby?" you excitedly asked, only to receive a sad smile from your husband as a reply. "akaza?"

"where's our baby? is she healthy? did the nurse take her out to clean?" akaza's heart shattered when he saw the excitement and hope in your eyes slowly disappear. "darling.." you shook your head at him, terror coating your face as the tears just started pouring from your tired eyes.

"no, no, no, no!" you started thrashing around, not giving a fuck about the pain in your abdomen, eager to remove all the cords and needles attached to you just to see your baby. akaza immediately hugged you tightly, trying to stop you from hurting yourself further while whispering, "i'm sorry, my love. it's not your fault. i promise."

you kept on shouting "no!" and "my baby!" and it alarmed the nurses stationed near your room as they came in to check on you. your doctor soon came in and once you calmed down, she explained everything. about how the baby suddenly changed position and that the umbilical cord wrapped around her neck, causing her to suffocate. they also had to give you a c-section in order to get her out of you which explains the pain on your lower abdomen.

everyone was devastated when they heard the news. it was hard. no one could compare to a mother losing their child. mitsuri and your family tried visiting you, but you turned all of them away. you didn't want to feel ashamed and embarassed for failing to bring your baby safely in this world.

akaza knew you were more devastated than anything else, but deep inside he also felt defeated and broken. it was his first ever child. your first ever child. you both waited so patiently for one and she got taken away from you so quickly and suddenly.

he did not ever leave your side after that day, not caring if he missed work because you were more important to him than anything and anyone else.

akaza knew you needed him and he needed you.

however, you couldn't be there for akaza because you feel deep down the rabbit hole and you couldn't climb back up no matter how hard other people helped you do so. it was like the world and just life lost its meaning.

you never once thought about how akaza was feeling, because you were to focused on grieving and blaming yourself for being a bad and a failure mother. you never once saw how akaza would cry in his office or whenever he was alone in the bathroom or whenever you were already asleep at night.

but akaza never blamed you for anything. he couldn't imagine how hard it is to carry a life inside of you for nine months just for it not to live once it was out of your womb. he understood how you couldn't be there for him because he knew it how hard it was. he understood how you couldn't comfort him and make him feel better, because at least you were there with him. at least, you were still alive and breathing beside him.

you should've known. you should've listened to all of akaza's words about how "it wasn't your fault" and "i still love you no matter what". you should've felt it through his actions. how he would still kiss you every morning when you wake up and every night before sleeping. how he would still cook your favorite foods and try to cheer you up by playing your favorite shows on the tv.

because maybe. just maybe if you did, then akaza would not be kneeling on the floor with your lifeless body swimming in a pool of blood.

maybe he wouldn't have to bear the silence of the big house which was once a home for both you and him, and your baby. maybe the house would still be lively from your cheerful presence and maybe even filled with little akazas and you running around the house instead of two pink urns designed with cherry blossoms on a table.

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won4kiss · 4 months

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၄.၃ ݁ ˖ִ ࣪₊ ⊹˚ songs that remind me of enha (hl) ˖ִ ࣪₊

lee heeseung, park jongseong, jake sim, park sunghoon <3

warnings ˖ִ ࣪₊ me. I am the warning. I wrote this at 2am and had major brainrot, I got very emotional, (again everything im saying is a joke) not edited.

pls don’t take this seriously, it’s very random:c

(anything I say, is not irl or true at all and is just all jokes!! also ik the cover is different from my usual ones, I got lazy and I couldn’t find anything with the hyung line 😞, enjoy 🫶🫶)

(a/n) here’s something short and stupid until I finish my next heeseung fic🤗🤗 also short little beomgyu fic coming vv soon!!

lee heeseung

sweet night , v

baby come home 2 / valentines , the neighbourhood

hidden love ost ( forever star ) - zhang yihao

^ I strongly recommend watching hidden love and adding this ost to ur playlist!! so cute :c

˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

- when I think of heeseung, I get major angsty vibes like it’s genuinely a me problem. IDK WHY☹️☹️

- when I think of hee in a trope, I think a miscommunication type-thing, right person nd wrong time.

- I think it’s bc I’ve read sooooo many angsty things abt this man LIKE I LITERALLY REMEMBER A WATTPAD STORY I READ IN 2021. It was like the girl was suicid@l and hee was like “give me a month to make u wanna live” it was CRAZYYY. neways.

- BUT ALSO… *spoiler for my one of my ideas for a heeseung fic>> he gives me older brothers best friend trope vibes, like i recently rewatched the cdrama hidden love and he would be such a perfect duan jiaxu!! the vibes are there‼️

- im so sorry heeseung i luv u so so so much this isn’t personal :c </3

park jongseong

love on the brain , rihanna

my kind of woman , mac demarco

˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

- AAAAAAA JAYYYYYYY

- jay gives me like home vibes. Idk if that makes sense. pls bare with me.

- I feel like he would be like rich ceo kdrama man who falls in love with his secretary type trope☠️ the ceo vibes go HARD

- like when I see him, I genuinely feel comfort.

- he reminds me of like- anything romantic in the world, it’s giving husband material, gentleman (all of them r gentlemen but jay is oozing gentleman)

- it’s like when I see jay, I just feel warm😞

- (example; holding a cup of hot chocolate on a snowy winter day) yes I gave in example. this is jay.

jake sim (be prepared)

style , ts

labyrinth , ts

call it what you want , ts

little freak , harry styles

nobody gets me , sza

i.f.l.y , bazzi

˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

- lolz guess who my bias is🥲⁉️

- I warned u guys!!!

- I could genuinely talk abt this man for hours.

- my man my man my man my man my man my man my man. HE IS SOOO LOVER BOY MATERIAL LIKE I CANNOT FORM WORDS. like cmon guys yk i had to put ts on here. HE IS HUSBAND MATERIAL, BF MATERIAL, EVERYTHING MATERIAL.

- literally jake fits any trope, this man is so perfect.

- childhood best friends to lovers with jake is absolutely amazing and magical and it hits EVERY SINGLE TIME.

- he gives me childhood best friends 2 luvrs vibes bc he’s just so like… idk the word but this man is my everything.

- he is literally the lyrics, labyrinth is so him, call it what you want IS HIM, style is literally made about him⁉️little freak is what i feel about him (like the song is so good it gives u a rlly emotional feeling where u wanna sob) and nobody gets me….. yes that was personal.

(i sincerely apologize for this mess, I couldn’t hold myself back☹️)

park sunghoon

ocean eyes , billie eilish

cars outside , james arthur

line without a hook , ricky montgomery

consume , chase atlantic

˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

- sunghoon…😞

- he reminds me of a first love.

- he just gives me such sentimental bittersweet vibes when it comes to this stuff.

- im struggling to find words rn bc suddenly im emotional thinking about sunghoon. he’s giving me I want u but I can’t have u vibes (help me)

- he ALSO gives me very rich ceo vibes, and the amount of rich ceo fics about sunghoon i see tells me ppl agree🔥🔥

- I also added consume bc he also gives like supernatural fic vibes (he’d be a rlly hot vampire or demon someone pls make one and send it to me🤗) and that song just fits the trope SO WELL.

- he’s so quiet and shy and looks like a sad man, and trust me I do not mean this in a way where im saying he’s depressed (yk the sexy sad men in movies?)

-sunghoon deserves sm and more, he’s such a gentle soul he reminds me of a bubble bath (idk what im saying anymore it’s 2am)

- he’s so cute. he’s my everything. he’s mine.

(sorry this is actual brain rot atp🤗)

- ok im done this made me sad i luv them all sm

MAKNAE LINE NEXT ORRR???

@won4kiss

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hms-tardimpala · 5 months

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Ficbinding: A Complete Kingdom by Komodobits

The fic: SPN, Castiel/Dean Winchester, 85k

This fic had me staying up until 2am to read, it swept me up and flattened me. It's so well-written, so faithful to the characters, so well constructed that all you can do is strap in and enjoy the ride and hope you're not sobbing by the end (a vain hope). It's such a good story, period, that I think it can be enjoyed by non-SPN people. Mind the tags. Summary:

The sea; it swallows me. It comes up to my knees and it swallows me. The boys owe Jody a few dozen favours, and so when her niece goes missing near an old fishing village on the coast of Maine, Dean, Sam, and a newly human Castiel agree to take the case on. They settle into an old abandoned lighthouse-keepers' cottage, and slowly the tide comes in. (post-s8)

The bind: I'm so proud of this one, guys. I tried new things, pretty much everything worked, and I learned new skills!

Let's start with the colors. The story is sea-themed and stormy, so I chose black, dark blue and silver for the cover and light grey and light blue for the headbands and bookmark. I meant to use white for the headbands, but discovered I don't have white ones. It's the first time I do an overlap of fabrics and it turned out awesome. The silver stripe is a simple gift wrapper ribbon.

Typesetting:

The title font is so cool, with a droplet effect. For the part titles I chose a kind of blurry, hazy font because this story is about perception of reality and the loss of it. The chapter titles of the first part are solid, then they're altered in the following parts, to symbolize a slipping grasp on reality as time goes on.

I put headers and bottom-of-page numbers this time, which forced me to figure new things out in LibreOffice and do some maths 💪

The image of a lighthouse also changes in the three parts of the story. If you've read this fic, you know why.

Little wave as a divider.

Making the book:

I hadn't made a big book (printed at the A5 format) in a while and it felt amazing going back to that. It stretched my maths muscles. It's relaxing to do a book and not have to fight for every millimeter, like with small books. It's a more forgiving format.

Trimming went amazingly this time, I'm finding my footing slowly.

I had to sandpaper the edges to color them silver. I don't mind working with sandpaper, but it's quite brutal on the book, and wouldn't do it every time.

The edge painting was made with a silver marker, so I knew it wouldn't be perfect, but it looks good enough and doesn't peel away.

My corners are improving! They look almost perfectly square.

In reaction to the last bind I made, I augmented the overhang (still don't know if that's the word) between the edge of the covers and the edge of the textblock. From 3mm to 5mm. I'm very happy with this, it looks much better!

It's rare that I'm disappointed in a fabric, so I'll highlight here that I don't like this endpaper. It's pretty, but it's a sort of glossy magazine paper that didn't react to glue so well.

Overall, I love this book and this story deeply. I think it may be my best work technically so far.

Fonts: Rained (title), Moonrising (author name), Louis George Cafe (text), Brightness, Brightness Book and Brightness inverted (chapter titles), Snorter (part titles). Materials: 2mm grey board, 80g/m² ivory Clairfontaine A4 paper, synthetic ribbon and headbands (found on amazon), black and blue cloth and endpaper from Schmedt, silver non-textile ribbon (bought in craft store).

Feel free to ask me more about materialsand fonts (or whatever), it won’t bother me at all to tell you what I used, but I’m too lazy rn to write it in this post that’s long enough already.

#ficbinding #bookbinding #my bookbinding #spn fic #komodobits #a complete kingdom

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randomsillyfangirl · 1 year

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Good Looking - Pablo Gavi x Reader

Bonjour bonjour tumblr ☺️

Thank you @anedpev for the song recommendation!!💕

I'm working on two MASSIVE posts. One Pablo Gavi x Reader and one is Oliver Otto x Reader so look out! But I'll be posting mini stories in between 😚

Song: Good Looking by Suki Waterhouse

This is REALLY short sorry. But I fucked up my leg and can't focus on writing very well so take this 😩

------------------------------------------------------------

The skyline falls as I try to make sense of it all

The paparazzi had an image of you and Pablo leaving one of your coffee shop dates. Sadly, lots of people were trying to insult you- and it hurt. You sobbed while reading one of the comments.

Pablo walked in after training, " amorrr? Amor!? " at first, his tone was happy. But the second time? Heart broken. You looked up, tears running down your soft face. " they hate me. " you said, voice breaking. Pablo ran to you and held you, repeating " no they don't.. "

Then you started getting texts from your friends asking about it, which made you cry more. You hated the attention. Gavi grabbed your phone and put it on his bedside table. " no more phone. You tried going to feel like the skyline is falling apart, so no more phone." he told you and you nodded, accepting the idea.

Gavi was exhausted. But he still stayed up till 2am doing things to distract you. You baked cookies, watched a movie, a puzzle, he did your nails and you two cuddled.

As soon as you got into bed, you fell asleep. All of your worries washed away. Pablo held you close by your waist, smiling into your hair before falling asleep himself.

I thought I'd uncovered your secrets, but turns out there's more

Successful Spain football player caught with (your job) y/n l/n!!

Was plastered on what seemed like every news company. All with different theorise about your relationship.

Y/n L/n caught with Pablo Gavi, new relationship?

Pablo Gavi is no longer on the market ladies, today is the day where 1,000s of girls mourn

Y/N L/N is no longer anybodys eye candy- only Gavis!!

And even more ridiculous titles...

Gavi was in training when the photos got leaked. But you were at home laughing your ass off, reading the titles and sending screenshots to Gavi. And as soon as he saw them, he laughed too and showed Pedri.

The truth was, you and Pablo have been dating for over two years. Recently, you've been sloppy with hiding from the paparazzi. But Gavi thought ' I'm going to marry here, they'll find out about her eventually.. ' when he saw someone taking a picture- he got to brag about his girl.

#pablo gavi #ily pablo gavi #pablo gavi x reader #pablo gavi x y/n #pablo gavi x you #gavi x reader #pablo x reader

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iamthecomet · 8 months

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hi comet! so sorry to bother you but i'm looking for a fic i read like half a year ago. might be even more. im not sure whose it was so if you might have any idea who wrote it or which fic it was, i'd greatly appreciate it. it was really angsty and it ended with a major character death (tw suicide). it was a longer dewther fic and one of the premises was that dew accidentally burnt copia and he had to stay in the infirmary. and the ghouls basically shun dewdrop away, ignoring him. and then some stuff happens and it basically ends with dewdrop writing letters to the ghouls and papa before he kills himself (idk how to word this without sounding insensitive, im so sorry). and the rest of the ghouls plant a tree on a hill and one of the last lines of the fic was from aether who said "you'll never miss another sunset again". the fic left me so broken, i was sobbing at like 2AM. if you might have any clue who made it or what fic it is, pls pls pls i really need to read it again for the catharsis. if you have no clue, that's okay and I'm sorry for bothering you! hope you have a great day<3

Not a bother at all. And I do know the answer to this one (for once)!! It's Suspended Reality by @miasmaghoul!! One of my favorite fics that has ever come out of this fandom. I think about it ALL the time (though I haven't re-read it in a LONG time because it makes me ugly sob every single time). I screamed at Miasma about this like non-stop while she was writing/posting it because it was ruining my life in all the good ways.

Note to anyone clicking that link to read that fic for the first time: MIND THE TAGS. They're important and there for very good reasons. ♥

#comet comments #Suspended Reality Spoilers #in case anyone hasn't read it at this point #tw suicide #angst #tw major character death #I am still not recovered from this one

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yuukei-yikes · 1 year

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hi it is 2am and i think i'm kinda sleep deprived so i'm going to share my insanity with you

the song "i want to be your god" by kanzaki is literally so setocore. like novel 8 seto kousuke. the whole thing of wanting to be this figure that someone can look up to for support, but the protagonist of the song is saying how they thought they could like. trick themselves into believing this but they really weren't this "god" and was of no help to anyone which is literally seto's thought process in novel 8 and oh my god it makes me insane. someone even made a seto mv to this song i don't have the link sobs

other kanzaki iori songs that are kageprocore (sorry i have insane kanzaki iori autism he is my favorite vocaloid producer) is "hated by life itself". shinayacore. trust me

another kanzaki iori song. "adult children". very kanocore except the protag of the song seeks to be loved by someone while kano feels as if he doesn't deserve it, but both still share the feeling of not being able to change, like they're so far gone that they can't go back. they may have grown up but they still feel like a scared, weak child at heart. PLEASE HEED THE WARNINGS FOR THE SONG ON THE VOCALOID LYRICS WIKI LIKE ACTUALLY.

okay final one. "if there is love (or the japanese spelling, ai ga areba)" it's directly related to adult children and uses similar themes but from the perspective of another "adult child" this one i feel is more mekatriocore. the same warnings of adult children don't rly apply too much for this song as the things are more Vague but if you know adult children then you know what it's referring to if that makes sense.

there's also "extra" but i need to look into that one a bit more first. kinda marrycore from my first read through of the lyrics though. okay that's it sorry for rambling on for so long

THESE ARE ALL AWESUM i never listened to anything by kanzaki iori so thank u for introducing me to it, ive been listening to a couple and theyre so good!!! when i have time ill sit down to read all these lyrics ur analysis is already making me wanna explode

#ask tag

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blimbo-buddy · 1 year

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Absolutely sobbing over your praise. I am but a mere and chaotic writer of kitty angst. I'm so glad you're loving it because it's just- man, I like writing it. I honestly was just taking from the prompts and bonefall's snippets. It's been like - gosh, about 9ish years or so? - since I read DotC.

I am 20% sorry for putting you through this, 50% thankful, and 30% ready to do it part 3.

The part about Turtle Tail not saying sorry was something I subconsciously hammered in my brain. I didn't want her to apologize because that wasn't the goal. Turtle Tail's self-loathing of herself blinded her. She hated what she did, so she beat herself down and tried to fix this situation with more hate at first. Then, she threw all of her insecurities out there in hopes of explaining herself.

In my mind, her fatal flaw is that she thinks too self-centeredly. Notice how Turtle Tail, while she admits her flaws, thinks that's her apology. She thinks that pointing out how much Bumble means to her is apologizing.

Not once did she say, "I'm sorry for everything I said to you."

But several times she did say what she thinks and how she feels.

There's no empathizing with how horribly wounded Bumble is.

There's no apologizing for breaking her promises.

It's just hatred for herself and the world.

It was something I knew subconsciously, but it hit me when I checked for myself that she didn't. I was shocked despite my brain knowing before writing what the last sentence of the Bumble part would be.

Turtle Tail told herself she changed, but did she? Was this truly change?

Stay tuned for more of me as, once it is not 2AM and I am not running on questionably made tea, I will return for your ankles.

You've done this to me anon. YOU DID THIS TO ME

But in all seriousness I am ready for part 3. I really like the fact that, yeah, TurtleTail only spewed out self-loathing comments about herself, unknowingly making the situation revolve around her and not her… you know… dying friend. I feel extra bad for both of them in the situation (seeing as they are dotc women and get the short end of the stick), but extra EXTRA bad for Bumble. And this story exemplifies it, imagine Bumble just waiting for TurtleTail to actually say "Sorry", hoping that she does, silently begging that she does. TurtleTail acknowledge the horrible thing that led to this and says that she had been thinking back on it, but, she missed the most important part of an apology, the apologizing itself.

TurtleTail had lost the opportunity to change in Bumble's eyes. Bumble pitied TurtleTail's self loathing, she knew that TurtleTail's "apology" was unknowingly focusing all of the attention back onto TurtleTail without that bullshit "I wish you could have been happy with us but you could never have been a wild cat" canon line we get, like, damn TurtleTail what a fucking line to tell your dying friend. But in this story, TurtleTail is truly hurting, so badly. She genuinely feels bad for what she had done (or lack thereof) and she wants to atone for it, but her apology doesn't stick, it's not really an apology without the sorry. So it gives you a mixed perspective of TurtleTail, not so much morally grey though, I'm sure there's a word for it.

I love the open-endedness of the two stories (especially the Bumble pov one), does Bumble truly forgive TurtleTail? Will TurtleTail give a proper sorry? Will they reunite when they die and that's when TurtleTail apologizes? Will they try again? GAGH, it's all so great! I'm really excited for part 3, don't stress yourself writing it anon I'd gladly wait weeks and months for it

#blimbo rambles #ask

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daidoruyume · 1 year

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Chapter 2 Miyuu in my dreams

I was waving my yellow (Miyuu’s color) penlight, and cheerfully singing along to the chorus. I was at the front row, when our eyes met. She was looking at me, deep in the eyes, as if she could see everything that’s inside of me. It felt a little weird, having my soul bare for her to read into it. But she kept looking at me, and I kept looking at her, I felt like we were intertwined in some way. It was seemingly the last song, and they said goodbye and the concert ended. It felt empty to not have her eyes directly into mine. But there was a meet and greet session afterwards, and I obviously had bought tickets to spend with Miyuu. I couldn’t find Kaho anywhere, and it felt like I was rather floating than walking, but I arrived in time for the meet and greet. I was ninth in line and I got quite jealous of the girls and boys that got to meet her first… I wanted Miyuu to be all mine. But I tried to remain calm as I made my way to her when my time came.

“It’s been a while since we last saw each other!” Miyuu opened. Did she remember me? I felt glad.

“Y-yes… the last time was last Winter!” I surely remembered it perfectly.

“You must have missed me. I missed you too, you know, Yuu-chan.” I haven’t told my name, was her memory that good? I felt relieved in a way… I was amongst everyone else and she remembered it.

“I-I missed you more… I look at your pictures every day.”

“I have the same habit, actually.” I didn’t get what she meant, but Miyuu was kind of playful so I let it slide and laugh alongside her. We held hands, in a very child-like way, but then, Miyuu intertwined her fingers with mine. I think… it was already someone else’s turn, but we kept looking at each other, smiling, and our hands remained sealed.

“I really, really do miss you.” She said, and her eyes shined brighter than ever. “You don’t know how much I love you.” Isn’t that line supposed to be mine? I’m the one who loves her… how is it the other way around? We were separated by a table that was about the height of my waist, but Miyuu suddenly pulled me closer and… locked our lips together…? I closed my eyes, but I could feel the stares and hear the gasps around us. It didn’t matter, because Miyuu was kissing me just the way I imagined she would. To my surprise, I woke up, with a soft feeling in my lips.

I turned on my night light and put on my glasses. I looked around my room so I could be sure it was a dream. It felt so real, though… I opened Twitter again, it was around 2AM. Miyuu would sometimes stay up late and post something. That particular day, she was probably fast asleep, while I was about to cry. Have I taken this too far? I think it’s quite normal to dream of someone that plays a huge part of your life, but so intensely like that? And the realization of it not being real… it made my heart beat sadly. I didn’t want to cry, but I felt salty tears reach my lips and soon my vision was fogged. It made no sense… I was pursuing my studies, I had a good job, I lived in a good place and I had friends… I could even easily have a girlfriend if I wanted to… and yet, I realized, sadly and weakly, that I was in love with someone untouchable, unreachable. I could look at her as much as I wanted, but she would never look at me the same way. I could yearn for her my whole life and she would never hear it. I started sobbing like a baby, because I felt like a loser. I felt like I had made a terrible mistake… and yet, Miyuu was all my happiness, all my serotonin… being away from her would be really hard to do.

I felt hopeless and understood nothing could actually be done, so I just took my glasses off, turned off the light, took a sip of water and went back to sleep. It couldn’t be helped. I just needed to rest and tomorrow I would be happy once again.

☆☆☆

I still felt a little empty, but I decided to think of the dream in a more positive way. Dreaming of your oshi is always a good thing. Well… maybe I came to understand that I do love her romantically, and that will definitely be troublesome… but I decided to be happy, because that’s what Miyuu would want.

I did my chores very diligently, but it was hard to eat lunch properly. I was just gulping it down like an ogre, and I'm sure people were watching, impatiently looking at my phone while I waited for the clock to hit noon. I was already on their Twitter page when it finally did.

@krystal_RAINBOW

New album "my LIGHT ☆ my LIFE".

Title track: "☆Light in the Night Sky☆"

B-side: "バラのバランス"

Solos

Nishijima Keiko: 蘭 (Ran; Orchid)

Satou Satomi: 自己嫌悪 (Jiko Keno; Self-loathing)

Yamamoto Miyuu: 花火 (Hanabi; Fireworks)

Yamamoto Anna: Kiss me infinity

Watanabe Kaori: 曇り雨晴れ虹のレフライン (Kumori, ame, hare, niji no refrain; cloudy, rainy, sunny, rainbow's refrain)

Kakizaki Yumeko: ワガママPerfect Symphony (Wagamama Perfect Symphony; Selfish Perfect Symphony)

Tachibana Yuzuna: My TURN!!

Kaneko Ayumi: ハッピーラッキー☆パラダイス (Happy Lucky ☆ Paradise)

I was so happy I almost choked on my food! And, to make things merrier for me and Kaho, Miyuu was the center for the title track and Keiko for the b-side. Things like this make my heart burst into happiness! So, needless to say, I went on Twitter to post about my expectations for the album, and got a couple likes. Feeling recharged, I went back to my routine. Always thinking of Miyuu, obviously. I kept remembering the kiss, though, very vividly… it really felt like our lips had touched. It also felt a little strange, as if I had some kind of fever. I felt a little sick, but it had a bittersweet taste to it. I guess it’s love.

In the Tweet it was also announced there would be a teaser at 6PM, so I was pretty excited to see what they would give us!

☆☆☆

I wanted to go to sleep, but I also really wanted to watch the teaser! I kept waiting, and waiting, then I felt hungry and had to fix myself a snack, but then finally, the teaser was released! It was very short, but it had a medley of the songs, presenting the girls in different scenarios… Apparently, there’s going to be a PV for each song! Krystal Ent. must be making a lot of money these days, thanks to me, I guess… no joking now, the girls are becoming super popular, even overseas! Of course, I’m a spokesperson for them, so all of my family in Brazil knows about these girls, and I try to make sure every person I come across on Twitter gets to listen to at least one song. I’m too crazy for them, that’s the truth. Anyways… Miyuu was so pretty in the MV! She was dressed in this beautiful yukata, looking at the night sky… I’m so excited for her song!

I actually have some memories myself of summer festivals and fireworks, which is the theme of her solo. Although I wanted something more hip-hop, a ballade is good, too. So, I don’t recall it perfectly, but I met this girl at a festival once. She had short black hair and was very boyish, we didn’t tell each other our names (I guess we were too dumb at the time), but we had a lot of fun and played the whole night. We took a photo, but she kept it because she told me one day she would find me and she would give me a copy. We didn’t exchange contacts, and I never met her again. Sometimes I think of her, although her image fades and I can’t picture her face. But the way she treated me was so… amazing… At that time, I was being bullied at school for being overweight, but she didn’t see me as weird or different. She saw the best of me, and I saw the best of her. I hoped to meet her again for a long time, and I even went to the festival for two more years only to realize it was foolish to try to find her with the little I knew. Wherever she is, I hope she’s okay.

I was getting drowsier and drowsier and I don’t even recall setting my phone away… soon, I was asleep. But I woke up to some kind of laughter and found myself in a car.

“Finally awake?” What? It was… it was Miyuu talking to me. She was the one driving, and I was in the seat next to her. “You’re drooling, you know?”

“Haa… that’s… a little embarrassing.”

“That’s fine, it’s just me, remember? I think it’s cute.” She gave me one hell of a smile. “We’re almost there. Quite a long drive, isn’t it…?” Suddenly, I remembered we were having a picnic, and that I had stayed up late finishing some work. She seemed to have slept well, unlike me.

We arrived in a beautiful space. It was like a park, but completely empty, so it seemed like we had a reservation…? It didn’t make much sense for me, but I was really looking forward to that date. There was beautiful greenery around us, so many flowers… I was surrounded by love. She held my hand and gave me a little kiss, and then started to prepare everything for us to sit and enjoy the food we cooked together. I could even remember how much fun we had cooking it.

It felt perfect, and real. We sat down and enjoyed our sandwiches, cookies and cake, with some tea. It all tasted so good! We talked about our future, and the things we wanted to do together. Then, suddenly, she looked at me very seriously. She had a sad look, despite all the happiness we felt.

“What’s wrong?”

“You… you don’t remember, do you?” I didn’t know what she was talking about. “I can’t reach out to you… no matter how hard I try, our hands keep getting separated.” She was about to cry, I felt.

That little perfect world that was just for us started to quickly form clouds that seemed really full. I felt stupid, hadn’t we checked the weather? It started to rain as tears ran down her face, and even when crying, she looked beautiful.

“You’re leaving?” I didn’t want to, but I felt like we were being disconnected somehow. I couldn’t see her face anymore, she was gone. Or was it I who disappeared? I woke up really sweaty and it certainly felt like I had caught rain. Once again, I cried. That time, because I felt like I had hurt her somehow. ‘This was supposed to be a fun hobby’, I thought, while I sobbed. Still, I was so tired from my day that I fell asleep once again. I had another dream, but this time it had nothing to do with her. Just a regular, boring dream. I couldn’t run away from Miyuu, though. My phone lock and home screen, my walls, my pajamas, even some of my dishes were merch. I ate the food she says she likes to eat, I watched the channel she says she watches in the morning, I brushed my teeth with the same toothbrush she once said she uses. Everything in my world was about Miyuu. I suddenly felt some anxiety, some fear, some feeling I didn’t understand where it came from. It eased within a few seconds, but I kept feeling sick. I had to skip classes and work, because I suddenly found myself not being able to get up properly. What was happening to me?

#daidoruyume

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abubblingcandle · 2 years

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I’m drowning and everything hurts and I’m tired of having to be the person who isn’t allowed to feel this

Don’t need to read just don’t have anyone to talk to

The past year has been one depressive episode after another with brief periods of vague motivation in between. I’ve got no friends, my only social interaction is a sport I’m shit at, I’ve got a job that on a good day makes me want to punch a wall. I spent two weeks suffering with an illness that made me throw up so violently I couldn’t move but I still had to be in work and on two school trips to not let people down. I then went straight to my parents to act as a carer for my mum over the shittiest Christmas ever and spent one and half weeks wishing to any higher power that it would be over. Then feeling so so guilty as losing her may well kill me. Only to come back to a flat that is so messy and horrid because I don’t have enough storage and was ill for two weeks before. Then to immediately start work again (like I got back home in the evening of the 2nd and was back at work for 8am on the 3rd, immediately).

Since then I have been stumbling out of bed, throwing food into a bag, running to work, getting home, getting into bed, crying a little, sleep, repeat. I was so stupidly proud of myself on Wednesday when I cooked myself a homecooked meal for the first time in months. It was tomato pasta but it was something and I was so proud of myself. So the next day I did it again, and put the dishwasher on before I fell into bed num. Today I emptied the bin that had been full and rotting for two months and sprayed out the fridge. The flat is still more mess and mold than usable space and my bed is still the only safe spot but it’s a little better.

I have been struggling for years but I’m not allowed to. I’m the only one not allowed to. I’ve got to work, I’ve got to look after mum, I’ve got to be there to help but I’m still a fucking let down. I can’t breathe. I just want to lay in bed in the dark. That’s all I have the energy to do.

My mum decided to come out for coffee near my place today despite being in so much pain she was sobbing. Despite me telling her I would see her next weekend and I didn’t want her to put herself through that. Only to them ask if they could come back to mine for her to rest. This is the only thing I have said no to her about since I moved out. The only thing.

“You and your brother need to come over more to help your dad but it needs to be you more because I need you” “Sure I’ll come over 3 weekends every month to stay for two days to look after you”

“You need to do this shopping for me because I don’t trust your dad” “Sure I’ll do that after work this week and bring it over”

“I don’t want you to go to that event because I’ll worry” “Ok I won’t”

“I need you to stay up until after midnight to help me get ready for bed” “Ok I’ll stand here and wait for you to need me”

“Sorry its 2am but I need a drink and don’t want to wake your dad” “Ok I’ll be right down”

“Your dad is worried about me so I need you here” “Ok I’ll drop everything in my one week off and come over for 5 days”

And the thing is I know even if I did say yes and she came over she would spend the whole time moaning and telling me how I’m letting my life go to shit and need to do better as “if you keep living like this and don’t lose weight you’ll end up like me and this is the worst existence ever” (the speech I get every other day). And instead I got the “stop making excuses, you’re such a mess you can’t even help your mother who is in so much pain by having her over” speech which is a new one but a *great* one. So instead of actually sorting my shit out for OFSTED at work or doing my clothes washing while watching sport like I wanted to do today ... I’m laid in bed, out of tears, out of energy, out of hope.

I’m just drowning

#personal stuff

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samchman · 2 years

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Dear Taylor Swift,

This message may never reach you, but I'm going to put it out there anyways. I was a big Tim McGraw fan and when I first heard your song I thought, "Who is this chick dropping Tim McGraw’s name in her song," but was hooked.

My girls and I would blast “Shake it Off,” run around and jump on and off the beds when one of us was having a bad day or when other kids were being mean to them. I told them to shake it off and not let people bring them down. Your music has been an integral part of our lives, especially over the past 3 years. We have found solace, comfort, distraction in your songs at some of the lowest points of our lives.

Three years ago, on the way home from a volleyball tournament, I crashed my car into a poll which instantly paralyzed my oldest daughter, who was only 13 at the time. We didn't know if she would live, but, by the grace of God, she did. Every single day is a mental and physical battle for Valerie that has no expiration date.

This child of mine is a fighter of battles that most will never see. It both breaks my heart while simultaneously making me so incredibly proud of her. I won’t quit trying for my child, EVER, in life, and in helping her to pursue a dream of hers.

One of her dreams, her wish is to see you in concert. You see, your music is a part of our lives, through the good and the bad times. It has brought us comfort, laughs, tears, and hours of distraction during hospital stays, doctors appointments, surgeries, procedures, and long road trips to places she doesn’t want to go. We make up games with your songs; We hum a song and the other must guess it. One of us will read some lyrics of a song, and the other has to guess what it is. We stayed up until almost 2am while in the hospital and listened to Red, Taylor’s Version when it was released.

Today I let her skip school 🤫to try to get tickets to your Tampa, FL show. I woke her up this morning, helped her get out of bed, and she got dressed in her favorite Red hoodie, yours of course.

We got booted out of ticket master and the virtual line for tickets multiple times throughout the day but kept trying. We hung in there when the Ticketmaster site had a “Glitch.” Finally got in! Only to be told that there were no more wheelchair accessible tickets. She cried, sobbed, and my heart broke for her. For if she wasn’t in a wheelchair, we could have bought tickets. Once again, she was reminded how inaccessible life is; I can’t tell you what that does to my heart.

Tickets to see you have been the only thing she has ever wanted for years. I made a promise to her when she almost died in the hospital, twice, that somehow, some way, we would make it to one of your concerts. We saved uped, and on her 16th Birthday last year gave her money and printed a “ticket” for if/when you went on tour. She plans to deck her wheelchair out as the “Getaway Car.” She plans to dress her service dog up too.

I just want to put a smile on her face and give her a good memory that she will never forget, because there are a lot of bad ones. I want to sit beside my daughter at your concert and watch her smile, and cry, and scream as we sing your songs together until we are horse. If you could somehow, some way, help this Mama out and make her dreams come true, I would be eternally grateful. Katie Chandler (Mom to Valerie)

#tree paine

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naviavu · 2 years

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on the first flight, back to your side

PAIRINGS: iwaizumi hajime x reader

SUMMARY: a long-overdue conversation with your first love, iwaizumi hajime. he wants you to know that he’s always been there for you, and this time, he’ll never leave.

WORDS: 1k~

TAGS: getting back together. best friend!iwaizumi. suicide mention. very different from my usual work, this is just angst with comfort at the end. the years are not accurate and i made this at like 2am so please bear with it lmao, not beta read. basically a self-insert lol.

“How many years has it been… six? Seven?” Hajime stops when he approaches the driveway. He looks at you, expecting. Waiting. You realize that he’s flustered.

“Did we meet each other in 2015? It feels like yesterday, Iwa.” You muse. It’s true– it feels like yesterday since you spent your whole high school with him. Graduated. Grew apart.

Somehow, in this godforsaken place, you found your way back to him.

Iwaizumi grins, full beam of teeth and crinkled eyes that makes your breath hitch because he’s always been beautiful. “And we’re here now. I’m working as a trainer. And, well, law school for you,”

He cringes internally– even a stranger would notice that words sounded a little off because both of you know damn well that you’re way past talking about careers and jobs. He knows you’ve seen his phone wallpaper. An old picture taken on his graduation day where he’s standing behind you with his hands around your waist, both of you sporting a youthful giggle.

He hopes it’s not just him who’s overwhelmed with all the words unsaid inside this car.

You take time to examine Hajime: his fit uniform shirt, veins running on his arms, broad shoulders, tanner than he was in high school, with tiredness in his eyes and newfound light all the same. You think that he can change everything about him and you would still know Hajime.

The same way he knows you.

You fiddle with the hem of your skirt, shivering slightly from the cold exhaust of the air conditioning fan. “Right… I always wanted to shoot you a text but things got in the way, I guess.” You have no better excuse and it almost makes you tear up that you missed all opportunities you had to reconnect with him. Just for your pathetic school work and deadlines.

He turns down the fan and you blush a little. Nothing escapes his gaze. “Hey, don’t worry about it.” Iwaizumi turns to you, hesitates, then holds your hand against his.

Similarly how he did when you last visited the third years on their graduation day. A promise of reassurance. Homecoming. And warmth, warmth, and warmth.

“You’re here now, aren’t you? My little jewel. I’m glad you came back to me.”

You look away just before a tear escapes your eye but he knows you too well, so he gently cups your face to wipe your cheeks with his thumb. You never liked crying in front of anybody, even him.

You never liked being comforted either. Except if it’s him.

“I never liked it when you wasted your tears on me, sweet girl.” He jests, and you think about what his reaction will be if you tell him that there were nights you longed for his presence so much that there are permanent tear stains on your law books. You chuckle, teary-eyed. You have to tell him another time.

“I just–” You hiccup, and lean your face on his hands. You nuzzle against his palm. “It fucking sucks, Iwa. Those were seven years gone. Seven years that I could’ve– should’ve–” You sob again, and this time he doesn’t stop you.

“I always knew that I could send you a message whenever I wanted. I also secretly hoped that you would drop everything just to hear my voice again.” You tried to giggle, a faint echo of your high school self’s reaction whenever Hajime approached you on Kitagawa Daichi’s hallways or walked you home. “But I think that’s also why I didn’t. Because I thought maybe, you’re too busy and I’ll just be a distraction, or you already forgot about me–”

“You know that I’ll never forget about you.”

“I know, Haji–” The nickname slips out, and you feel his hand tremble and hear a soft gasp from his lips, as if to say, oh. Oh. “I was so stupid. Some nights I came so close to ending it and then I remember you, seeing your name on my contacts or in a random picture on social media. Like a reminder that there’s still someone who cares that I exist and I… if the world will allow me… to come home to.”

The car is quiet. The busy highway feels so far away and it’s just your sobs, now quieter and more gentle, and Hajime’s soft breathing.

After a few seconds, he comes out of the car with no warning, goes to your side, opens the car door, picks you up, and carries you to your apartment. All your protests of ‘Iwa, I’m too heavy!’ were shushed. He opens your door and places you on your bed. He leaves for a moment to wash up, and you sink into your bed.

He invites himself to the other side and lies beside you. He pulls you in his arms and hugs you tight as if he’s scared that you’ll disappear. He presses kisses on your crown, just like seven years ago inside locker rooms with his duffel bag dropped by his side.

“I can’t– I don’t know a world without you. And I don’t want to know what it’s like.” Hajime whispers, hot breath brushing by your ear. His words are muffled by your hair. “I’m so fucking happy that you’re here with me. And you let me in again,” His voice breaks. “You let me come back to your life. And this time around I’ll always be here, and I know how to take care of you better.”

He pulls back and looks you in the eyes. Olive greens staring back at yours, longing, desperate, and reassuring. Please let me be a part of your future. Please don’t shut me out again.

“I know this is probably a bad time to say this but I’ve had my fair share of relationships… but I’ve always looked for you in them, Hajime. I could never forget you, the way you made me feel, and months with them didn’t even compare to the half-hour lunches we had together. It’s so fucking corny, I know–”

He laughs, soft and teary. He thinks about the time he dated someone because they had the same eyes as yours. “It’s not just you, babe.” He’s always been stupid when it involves his feelings about you.

“Haji…” You whisper. “Stay.”

Hajime smiles, the brightest one he ever had since he arrived. “The heart knows what’s best for it, jewel. And I’m glad that you finally followed yours.” He moves closer, and your lips meet. “It’s about damn time you come home.”

NOTES: i made this during my finals, it’s literally hell week and i’m half-dead in front of my laptop trying to chase deadlines for subjects that i probably won’t even have a high grade in. i watched haikyuu stage play: winners and losers a few hours ago. just now, i was listening to a playlist that my childhood friend gave me and got a little teary-eyed and inspired me to write whatever this is. a reminder from my childhood. my adult peeking inside the light of my inner child and trying to identify what made me so lively, and what kept me going.

If you’re reading up until here, i want to remind you that you’re never alone. It’s a line overused, i know, but there is a good side of you that lives in others people's memories, and i’m sure because of that they would want you to live too. Your inner child is always there, and i know you’re trying your best to protect it– what a sick world we live in– but you have to let it free. You have to set yourself free. then, maybe, just maybe, you will finally find your breakfast appetizing again and the sun beaming warm on your skin again.

i wish the best for all of you, and your inner child who is constantly under-recovery like mine.

#navi's writing #iwaizumi drabble #iwaizumi x you #iwaizumi oneshot #iwaizumi x reader #iwaizumi x y/n #iwaizumi haijime x reader #iwaizumi hajime oneshot #iwaizumi hajime x you #iwaizumi hajime drabble

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miraeluc · 4 years

Text

he comforts you

prompt: “it was 2am, he was spending his time building his minecraft world - that is until you showed up at his doorstep crying”

pairing: kozume kenma x reader

word count: 983

warnings: tw! depression, reader explains how they feel and it’s not nice, mommy issues, self harm in the form of disordered eating

genre: angst, fluff

NOTE: its a bit short because this drabble is just me dumping all of my emotions out, it’ll get kind of dark, so sorry in advance. also this is based on my situation, but if you feel the same, please feel free to message me. not proof-read

it was 2am.

you were walking to your boyfriend’s house, tears streaming down your face after yet another argument with your mother

this time it was because you never sleep during the night, opting to sleep during the day instead

if only she knew she was the reason you slept the days away.

kenma knew of your mental health

he knew how hard days could get for you and he always tried to be there as much as he could, showing his support in every possible way if it meant it made you feel better. but sometimes, you couldn’t help and shut him out.

he could never break your shell when you got that way, isolating yourself in your own room, not showing any signs of life at all, and it pained him, truly, but all he could do was wait it out until you came to him again.

he still supported you - of course. he texted you every day, reminding you to eat meals, reminding you to brush your teeth and drink water.

sometimes he even stopped by your house to make sure you were still alive - your mother usually being the one to open the door, claiming that “they’re only in bed, no chance of getting to her. being lazy - as usual.”

it irked him to no end.

you weren’t lazy. you were struggling and she was one reason for it.

she was the reason yet she had the guts to talk bad about you.

he usually just dropped off something he wanted to give you, your mother bursting into your room and giving you whatever he brought, but not leaving without starting another argument.

other days, he would (politely) shove past your mother, walking to your room and just laying with you,

no words needed to be exchanged - he already knew.

but lately, nothing seemed to be stopping you from closing yourself off.

it came to a point where he was truly worried for your health, fearing you didn’t take care of your body as he wished you would

so when he heard the doorbell ring at 2am, he was surprised, but he immediately knew it was you

when he opened the door, only to reveal you, who had been obviously crying a lot, judging by the red and puffy eyes, his gaze softened and he immediately pulled you inside the warmth of his home, away from the dangers the outside world held.

you immediately broke down crying when he pulled you into a warm hug

“-kenma, what do i do?...” you cried out

he sighed softly, patting the top of your head gently

“tell me what’s on your mind, angel? only then can i try to help.” he spoke softly, guiding you towards his room, pulling you down on the bed when you arrived, once again wrapping his arms around you

“i just.. i feel so h-hopeless? lately, i have no motivation to get out of bed because my mother strikes up a fight every time she sees me- all i want to do is sleep.. i’m awake at night, wondering where i went wrong and why i don’t deserve a loving mother too, i sleep during the day only for my mom to wake me up at 6pm to yell at me about how lazy i am-” you stopped, a sob ripping through your lungs

kenma raked his fingers through your hair, letting you know he was listening, giving you the space to speak when ready

“a-and school work’s been piling up.. i think i’m failing most of my classes, but i’m scared to check.. i do-n’t remember the last time i checked my assignments.. all i do is cry all day, i don-’t even eat anymore, i just can’t get up to eat..”

he sighed softly, hand reaching to wipe at your tears

“y/n, i need you to listen to me carefully. i know how hard it is - and i promise you deserve a loving mother too, it breaks my heart to see you suffer because of her.. but you can’t listen to what she says. as hard as it sounds, you’re not required to keep anyone in your life, even if it’s your mother. you’re allowed to cut her off - of course, it’s a bit hard right now, considering you still live with her, but until then, i’ll need you to stay strong for me and not let yourself get teared down by her harsh words and actions, ok? you’re so much more worth than what she makes you think. as hard as it is, i’ll be here with you, supporting you through whatever stones life throws at you. you will not feel like this forever, pain is temporary, as for your school work.. i can try and help you get back on track, but grades do not define your self-worth so don’t feel like you failed, you need to prioritise your mental health over your grades. i will be here to help you get back up on your feet and i’m happy to be, i’ll teach you how to love yourself, and it’ll be a long way, but you can do it, alright? i’ll forever be here, y/n, i love you.”

he then pulled you up to him, tugging you in a gentle kiss full of love

after he pulled away, he stood up, leaving the room, only to return with a glass of water and some snacks, smiling at you

you sniffled, also smiling

“thank you so much, kenma. i love you”

he shook his head, laying down beside you again

“think you can stay over for a few days?”

you smiled softly, shrugging “probably, just need to get my stuff.”

just like that, kenma brought back the light that was slowly diminishing in your life, and for the first time in a long time you felt hopeful.

requests: open

read rules before requesting.

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im-going-to-cryo-bust · 4 years

Note

heyy,may i request with diluc and kaeya, s/o who gets hurt but like doesn't tell them till someone slips it up.Thank you!!

Diluc and Kaeya on: fem!s/o getting hurt

WARNING: angst/hurt with comfort

You end up in the hospital after a series of rookie mistakes. It's not your first time, so you reassure your teammates and plead them to keep quiet about it. It only takes a few weeks or only one day, considering that elemental healing will speed up the process. All you have to do is lie down and pray that no one spills the beans until things are better or confirmed...

Kaeya is in the center of Mondstadt so it’s impossible to avoid him, he did suspect that your mission is going on longer than usual

Ah, but what was the point of secrecy? Kaeya is too good at sweet talking that he found out in an hour - majority of that hour spent hunting down your party members.

He'll most likely "accidentally" stumble into your party members and bait them to a willing, subtle interrogation

He'll tease out little hints and piece everything together without even needing a direct answer

If you had a minor injury

He would take some time on the way to buy you a snack or gift to make you feel better. He spends a little longer more than he would like, cursing a bit and choosing one of the three presents he thought you might like. You hear rhythmic knocks on your door and the door swings open, Kaeya dramatically walking in with a smug smirk on his face. "How are you doing?"

You roll your eyes as Kaeya saunters in, sitting next to you and holding a gift in his hands. He laughs, but he looks nervous. His leg shakes erratically despite him pushing down on it, knuckles white. Then you remember the way his eyes flickering around the room, averted by his vexing smirk. Before you can talk about it, he interrupts with a distraction, the gift. He observes you with a smile as you brighten up at the sight of it, feeling a lot more better at the sight of you.

Kaeya continues to distract you with teases that get you all riled up (adorable and hilarious in his opinion) and discussing the nervous nature of your encountered party member. You take the opportunity to retort about his nervousness. He looks stunned for a second, but he chuckles, “I knew I couldn’t get anything past you..” He hesitates. “I was worried when your friends looked so anxious, I was preparing myself for...” ‘The worst.’ Kaeya leaves it as it is, bitter smile in the pensive atmosphere. You clutch his hand tighter and Kaeya lightens up, reciprocating and knitting your hands together.

“When they said it was minor and you would recover soon, it was like a boulder was lifted off my chest.” He pats your head, his touch lingering longer and his gaze fond. “I’m glad, glad that you’re okay.”

If you had a major injury

"What?" His charming smile disappears, words slipping through a frown of gritted teeth, daring (even hopeful) for the person to say it's a joke. The answer doesn't matter, he can tell from their expression. He only allows a flash of pure terror to be seen by them, pushing through the crowds of people to reach the hospital.

When he bursts into the room to see you, his eyes fixated on yours. He freezes at the door, processing everything now while you are there, alive, in front of him. He refuses the voice in his head feeding into his fears, making him scared to come closer for a confirmation. He might have to face it: a loss and an emptiness.

But then you weakly smile and reach out for him; and he can finally breathe again. He is so urgent that he stumbles to get there, to give you comfort. Finally, when he sits next to you, you can see closer the joy but weariness in his expression. He has a smile unlike Kaeya, ridden with anxieties and unable to fool even a domestic dog. He pecks your hand and sandwiches it between his, familiar warmth wrapping around your hand. You start to fall asleep, exhausted by the events of today, and Kaeya overlooks worryingly. These injuries happen all the time, it's part of the job, but it doesn't make it any better to see - especially when it involves you. He swears and curses under his breath, not wanting to wake you up. 'It's best for her to get some rest', he tries to assure himself from his concerns, but he can't stop his stupid leg from shaking. He hangs his head, still clutching your hand, and he allows a few tears to fall despite himself. He closes his eyes and focuses on the touch of you, calming down and slowing down his breaths knowing that you are here, alive and well, next to him.

When you wake up, Kaeya's head lies uncomfortably asleep with a disturbed expression on his face. Your hand is intertwined with his while you both were sleeping, seeking that familiar heat that made you feel ever better. He mumbles in his sleep, his grip tightening on your hand as often as his eyebrows furrow. Your touch soothes him, the tension and wrinkles on his face vanishes when you lovingly stroke his hair or gently caress his cheek. As long as he can feel your warmth, he can sleep much better.

He would either find it through his acquaintance in Mondstadt’s hospital or be told at the winery.

It’s not pleasant either way, especially since there would be a period of unsettling silence after the metaphorical beans have been spilt

His interrogating is less subtle than Kaeya, very straight forward and to the point so he can get to where you are faster with preparation

Diluc uses the classic, intimidation method that is amplified by his resolve to see you and assure himself that you are safe

If you had a minor injury

You hear soft knocks on your door and a tentative voice asking from your lover, giving you a forewarning before he comes in. He doesn’t waste a second to be by your side, assessing your injury in closer detail then lightly scolding you out of the worry. It might take 2-6 minutes just for him to calm down and get it all out. Diluc is sensitive to your injuries, fearing the worst when anything happens, and he finds it childish; always trying to hide it with his lectures. This grumpy façade falls quickly, like always, after reassurance from you and inspecting your wellbeing with his own eyes.

Diluc sighs, "...but it's a minor injury, and you’re Y/n L/n.” He smiles assuredly and it encourages you because of how confident he is of you.

He’ll cling to you, self-aware of his behaviour and evidently embarrassed about it, but does it nonetheless with pink cheeks. You pretend not to see when he hesitantly leans on you or when his hand lingers on yours while you both chat about everything else. Soon you’ll find him pecking your cheek or kissing you more than usual

“It’s to make you feel better.” He mumbles going in for another after you tease him about it. Kisses are one of the things he uses to be expressive for his love for you, so he becomes generous when you get hurt like this and gets more affectionate to hopefully “love” the pain away.

If you had a major injury

Diluc is shell shocked; colour draining from his face in favour of raw fear. He is reminded of the dreadful past and it toys with his heart, stringing it along to his vulnerability of you. He fails to fully grasp his thoughts but his legs move on their own to see you, to feel you and to know for sure that you're okay. He pushes and shoves through people in his way, silent to anyone that approaches. He finds it hard to breathe, maybe it's how he ran to the hospital or the tight cinching in his chest.

When he enters your room, he'll take in your form and process the injuries you've sustained. He looks more horrified and panicked the longer he looks. He beats himself over it and swallowing the growing shame in his throat. ‘How could I have let this happen?’ Past buried memories come alive and it gets harder for him to stay grounded. These things don’t go away easily, he knows from experience, and he’s afraid of the unknown future and of what will happen next. What if you don’t recover and... Bad thoughts choke him up and he wallows deeper into it.

But then you smile, like nothing is wrong; even though that small action took so much energy and you end up wincing in pain. Diluc looks heartbroken.

No moment is spared when he is next to you, he'll even fall on his knees and just, cry. It's like all this tension in his chest is released at once. It's scary, worrying even, and you start to wonder who's supposed to worry over who. You stroke his hair and mumble comforting words, his sobbing dissolves into embarrassed sniffles. He remarks on it, but you reassure him that it's endearing.

You both might fall asleep like that; your hand on his nest of hair and his head on the hospital bed. There are some times you wake up and see Diluc awake in cold sweats, tightly gripping on the covers of your bed, pale as a ghost in the night. He tells you to go back to sleep and rest, but you wait until he does. He guilty stares at you as you stay up, half-awake at 2am, about how it’s fine and how it’s going to be okay. He shakes his head and looks pitifully at you, flinching at your injuries - more effected than you are. It makes you upset and a little frustrated, so you sigh and reach out to him. He leans close and you kiss him on the forehead, expressing a passionate-believe me glare. Then he remembers that he trusts you, you are the Y/n he loves. He smiles gratefully, and when you wake up in the morning he is still snoring asleep.

🌼💫 Hello, sorry for the inactivity, it’s just that I got quite stuck. But now it’s over and this is the result :) This is a very very long post, so I had to put a “keep reading” or else people uninterested would have to keep scrolling for 5 minutes. A reminder is that this is what I hc Diluc and Kaeya to act, it’s not definite and it’s fine if you disagree because this is imaginary and based on subjective perceptions. If you do enjoy these hcs, do check out my blog for more and tell me if you do!

#genshin impact #genshin headcanons #genshin impact diluc #genshin impact kaeya #genshin impact headcanons #genshin diluc #genshin kaeya #diluc x reader #Diluc headcanons #kaeya x reader #kaeya headcanons #kaeya #diluc #s/o getting hurt #genshin impact hc

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random-of-random · 3 years

Text

The Secret - Chapter 3

The Apartment

A/N: Hey lovelies! Again, thank you for reading and liking! I have a procedure tomorrow so I may take a few days off, but I will try to have the next chapter up as soon as possible!

When Y/N helped Graves onto his couch, she let out a small huff of annoyance. He had complained all the way from the car.

“We should have apparated.” His voice was still weak, but full of judgment.

“You're too weak to apparate.” She reminded him, for the third time.

“Well that no-maj torture device wasn't any better.”

“That was an automobile, and it's one of their newest major inventions. It’s just starting to get popular. You have to admire how they get around.”

“I don't have to admire anything.” He grumbled causing her to roll her eyes. “Besides, you didn't need to help me walk into my own house.”

Her eyebrows raised. “I'm sorry your majesty. Next time I will let you crawl.” It was going to be a long three days. She could feel it. Even knowing him for a year, she was sure he wouldn't do well being on forced bed rest.

“If you wouldn’t mind, in my office are some files. I can, at least, get some work done.” Yep, there it was. He pointed to a closed door to her left.

“Percival, it’s after midnight.”

“Yes, and?”

“You really need some sleep.”

She saw his jaw clench and his eyes narrow. “Miss Y/L/N, I am going to be forced to get plenty of sleep. As long as I am home I don’t want to be useless.”

“You’re not useless you’re-“

“The files. Mrs. Y/L/N.” It wasn’t a request anymore, and she knew if she refused again he would be up on his feet, getting them for himself. So, as she headed for the door she allowed herself to roll her eyes.

Percival’s apartment would surprise a lot of people. It was warm. A decent size, they had passed a kitchen and dining room before getting to the living room. At the opposite end of the living room was a hallway, she could only assume to the bedroom and bathroom.

As the door swung open she almost laughed to see it was as disorganized as his work office had been. Turning on a light she let her eyes adjust a moment before focusing on the stack of files on his desk. The whole room smelled like him, and it was likely this was where he spent most of his time. There were accolades hanging on the wall, and a pair of reading glasses on his desk. She let out a sigh before grabbing the files and heading back to the living room. Setting the files on the table he leaned forward and opened the first one.

Y/N checked her watch. “Mr. Graves you need to take your next dose of potions at 2.” He looked up at her and slightly smiled. She must have been frustrated with him if she called him Mr. Graves. “If you are alright I’m going to quickly go to my apartment and grab a few things.”

“That’s fine.” He said, turning his focus back to the case he was working. Y/N nodded and was gone with a pop.

She landed in the middle of her, much smaller, living room. Everything was pitch black for a second until she switched on a lamp. She allowed herself a moment to just lean against her chair and take a few shaky breaths. When she had gone to Percival’s office to retrieve his effects before they headed for his home, she had allowed herself to cry, briefly. The idea of losing him had become painful, though she was sure she could never tell him that. Sitting down, those feelings washed over her again, never listening to his stories, seeing his small smile, catching him off guard and making him laugh. She felt the tears pouring down her face and she let out a small sob. Pushing the feelings away she stood and headed into her bedroom. Grabbing a bag she quickly picked a few clothes, wiping her eyes periodically. Once she felt she had enough for a few days she used her wand to turn off her lights and back to Percival’s she went. She appeared near his front door, not wanting to startle him.

He was still working on the same file, his eyes focused on the paper in front of him. She set the bag down at the end of the couch.

“What are you doing Miss Y/L/N?”

“I figured I would be sleeping on the couch.”

“No need. There is a guest room. First door on the left, down the hall.” He answered quickly. “Though, were there not a guest room, I would be taking the couch.”

“Were there not a guest room you would not. You’re injured and need rest.”

Percival finally looked up at her, more to argue, but stopped. “Y/N, are you alright?” She realized her eyes must have been red.

“I’m fine, sir.” She assured him. “I should put this bag in the spare room, sir.” He watched her walk away, not taking his eyes off of her until she had turned the corner.

The spare room was about the size of her bedroom at home. Simple: a bed, dresser, lamp, and a nightstand. She set her bag down and looked at the mirror next to the dresser. It was no wonder he noticed. Her eyes were puffy and red. It was clear she had been crying. Taking in a slow breath she pulled her wand from her jacket and quickly hid what she could, before placing the jacket on the bed and heading back to the living room. Percival was no longer engrossed in a case file, in fact the file was closed and back on the pile.

“Can I get you something, sir.”

“What’s wrong?” He asked sincerely.

Y/N shook her head. “It was momentary, I’m fine. Would you like something to drink or eat?”

“Y/N? Please be honest with me.”

Y/N looked to the floor and back up into his eyes, choosing her words carefully. “Tonight was just frightening that’s all. I was worried, and emotions built up.” Percival began to stand, and she was next to him in a second. “You really shouldn’t get up. I know, I need to learn to control my emotions better.”

He looked at her for a moment. “Do you believe that’s what I was going to say to you?” Y/N was stuck, unsure of what to say. Percival wrapped his arms around her, and her pulled her softly against his chest. “It’s okay for situations like this to be frightening. You did everything you needed to. You held it together. No one could ask anymore of you. When you are alone you’re allowed to feel those emotions. You’re human, Y/N.” His voice was calm, quiet, comforting and she felt herself relax into him, his warmth, his words.

“Thank you, Percival.” Her voice was barely above a whisper and she could have sworn the ghost of a kiss touched the top of her head before he pulled away.

——————————

Percival had barely made it to the 2AM hour for his potions. Despite pretending like everything was fine, he was weak and exhausted.

So, Y/N dreaded waking him up for his 6AM potion. She must have stood at his door for a full minute. This would be her going into his bedroom. Even at 2 he had still been on the couch, and she had merely helped him to the door after. Taking a deep breath her knuckles rapped on the wood. Nothing.

“Percival?” She called out, knocking again.

“Come in.” She heard his voice say. Opening the door, she was surprised to find him sitting up in bed. She could see his blue and white striped night shirt, and a black blanket was pulled up to his waist. The room itself was sparse. A large bed in the center, directly across from the door, a window to her right, and a dresser and mirror to her left. On the nightstand was a small lamp, which was on, and more files. Something clunky was under the files, but she couldn’t see what.

“I’m sorry to wake you, but it’s time for your potions.”

“I needed to be up anyway.” He said quickly. “I have to go into the office today.”

Y/N let out a small laugh. “That’s not happening.”

“I think someone is going to notice if I’m not there.” Percival didn’t like to toot his own horn, but he had worked consistently and with any luck was about to be named the next Head of Magical Law Enforcement.

“I’ve already left word with Arthur that you wouldn’t be coming in for a few days, plus your doctor has informed Madame President.” Y/N explained. “If you would like I can go in and explain it myself.”

“You don’t have to do that.” He answered and she handed him his first potion, which he drank down quickly. It tasted slightly of some sort of fruit. Not entirely unpleasant. The second one, however, tasted of metal and he worked to not make a face getting it down.

“You should get some more sleep.” Y/N suggested, taking the bottles.

“I can get some work done.”

“Percival.” Her voice was softer than he was used to and it made him look into her deep brown eyes.

“Please, for me, get some more sleep. It’s the best way to let your body heal. I promise when you wake up next I will bring you whatever files you would like.

He considered his options for a moment. “Alright, those are acceptable terms.” A small smile played on his face.

“Good.” Y/N gave him a small nod before quickly leaving his room, pausing just outside to catch her breath. She certainly never expected to be in his apartment, let alone his bedroom.

————————————

By the time Percival woke at 9 Y/N had breakfast ready and waiting. He felt almost groggy - it had been a long time since he woken up so late. Usually he was up by 5, and rarely ever slept in past 7 - even on his days off.

He slowly walked toward his dining room, lured by the scent of bacon and pancakes. He watched Y/N for a moment as she hummed to herself and continued to make food.

“You didn’t have to-“ His sudden words startled her and she let out a small shout as she jumped and stared at him with wide eyes. He couldn’t help but chuckle. “-do that, Miss Y/L/N. I am sorry I startled you.”

“Percival.” She abandoned the food for a moment to quickly walk over to him. “Please, have a seat.” She pulled out the head chair to the dining room table, and Percival tentatively sat before she headed back toward the kitchen. “And, no, It’s fine.” She tried to calm her racing heart. “And it’s my pleasure. You need to eat, so do I.” She placed a plate of food on the table in front of him. Percival had tried his best to hide how weak his body felt, he didn’t want to appear frail. Y/N saw right through it. “Coffee?”

“Please.”

“Coming right up.” She grabbed him a steaming mug of coffee, along with her own breakfast, and sat down to eat.

“I know I didn’t have the ingredients for all of this.” Percival said as he looked at the array of food. Y/N had made bacon and pancakes. Also muffins - two different kinds - and sliced grapefruit.

“You didn’t. I went out earlier.” Taking a small sip of her coffee, she couldn’t help but tease. “Tell me, Percival, how does a head auror get by day to day on coffee alone?”

“I eat at the office a lot.” He answered simply before taking a bite of pancake and letting out a soft sigh. It was delicious. “Thank you for this. It’s…. Nice.” So, flirting was not his strong suit.

“Your next dose of medicine is in a little less than an hour. Work sent over some files for you.”

“Y/N?”

“Hmm?” She looked up at him and he was slowly chewing a piece of bacon, smiling at her. He tried to think of something to say, but his words were failing. He never failed to charm her when he was at the office. Maybe he was noticing how the sunlight coming through the window played in her hair. Or the fact that the bacon was the best he had tasted. Or, maybe he was realizing that she didn’t have to do any of this. She could have left him with the healers or arranged for a nurse. Instead she was sleeping in her boss’s guest room and barely sleeping, at that, so she could take care of him.

“After breakfast I would like to get some work done. Just because I’m not at the office doesn’t mean there aren’t things I can do.” He had blown it.

She still smiled. “Sure. Not a problem, sir.”

The rest of the meal was mostly in silence, but neither one of them seemed to mind, and just like she promised after breakfast Percival moved into his home office and started getting to work on the files.

He had read for about thirty minutes when he checked his watch. It was nearing 10, but no sign of Y/N with his medication. Taking a deep breath he stood up slowly and walked over to the door. He could tell the dramatic improvement just from the night before. Though it was taking a concerted effort, he was able to make his way across the room without every muscle screaming at him. Opening the door he was about to speak but saw Y/N asleep on the couch. The book she must have been reading lay forgotten on the floor. Between making sure his meds were taken on time, shopping for groceries, and cooking breakfast, Percival realized there was no way he could be sure she had gotten nearly any sleep. For a moment his plan was to just take the medication himself, but it occurred to him, he had no idea where she had placed it.

Clenching his jaw in slight frustration he made his was over to her, wishing he didn’t have to wake her up. Her breathing was slow, her face serene and Percival found himself watching her for a moment. To him, she couldn’t be more beautiful.

“Y/N..” His voice was barely above a whisper as she began to stir. For a moment she was confused about where she was and who was waking her up, until she saw him.

“Percival.” She quickly sat up. “I’m so sorry, I fell asleep.”

“It’s quite alright.” He reassured her. “I would have got the medicine myself, but I don’t know where you keep it.”

“Of course, one moment.” She was on her feet in an instant and he watched her walk down the hallway to the guest room. It would make sense for the medicine to be in there. “Again, I’m really sorry.” She was walking back toward him with one dose of each liquid.

“Please don’t apologize.” He tried to calm her. “You have been doing a lot.” Unlike this morning he took both potions as quick as he could, the metal one going first. “I am sorry I had to wake you.”

“I can help you with some files, if you would like.” She offered as she took the vials back. He was going to put his hand on her shoulder, that was his goal. His hand, however, seemed to have a mind of its own as he cupped her cheek. Y/N almost stopped breathing at his touch.

“You should rest. I am feeling decent. If I need you, I will let you know.” Percival realized he had taken a small step forward, and how close they actually were. All he needed to do was move in, but something stopped him and he, instead, pulled his hand back. Y/N couldn’t lie to herself and say she wasn’t disappointed, but she wouldn’t allow herself to believe Percival had tried, or even thought about, kissing her.

“I’ll be here if you need anything.” She promised and he have her a small nod before he headed back into his office and closed the door. Y/N sat back down on the couch and picked up her book. It was useless. She couldn’t concentrate if she wanted to.

#percival graves #percival graves x reader #fantastic beasts and where to find them #percival graves imagine

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