#it was supposed to be 5000 words and one illustration

[the-kings-jester]

To admit to the word of…love so ardently is vulnerable to a point he simply cannot risk. It's blazing and new and so dangerous.

It's easier to ignore it. Safer. To shove it down and cover it with annoyance, irritation, guilt, lust, admiration or respect. Anything else, anything to dull the ache. Anything to protect himself from losing. 

He's protecting them both. 

Sherlock knows what happens when you love someone. Love is loss. 

But now…there is nothing else it can be, laid bare in his mind. Tomorrow he will excuse it away, describe it as anything else. Distance himself from the truth once more. But now, that's all there is. All there ever was. 

That and the voices of the somethings below the surface of the world bellowing in tones too low to hear, felt in your bones with every step. 

He hates nights like this.

----

Finally finished my 11k porn with plot light angst transatlantic eldritch horror Frogwares Johnlock fic I've been cooking with my buddy @themostat who edited and drew all the artwork for it (his art work is insane, check him out) for the like 3 people in this fandom. We see you guys. This got a bit out of hand. Please enjoy the first of the life/love/loss trilogy, and the culmination of hours of boat research and gay sex in the 1800s. Please play the games.

[stained-glass-salamander]

Happy Birthday!! 🎉🎉 - First of all I want to say how happy I am having found your blog relatively recently 😊 I really enjoy your style and look forward to your work every day. Be it in a post, or in the tags. I also want to thank you for being so supportive of mine! So, thanks! 💙 I hope you'll have a wonderful birthday.

1) truth: when I read your words about MCU it immediately had me thinking about its signal function in a broader social context, so what are your insights on that?

2) dare: I woke up one night and wrote this half sleeping, haven't used it yet, so this is a prompt: "Rhythm. Everything in existence logic pattern path of least resistance repetitive. Human = chaos. Repetition is boredom. The rhythm the pulse is distorted. Life! Life is chaos. The rest geometry."

3) we'll skip three 😋

4) I'd love a prompt!

5) and a flower, of course!

But because it's your birthday, I have a flower for you as well 😊 - enjoy your day!! 🎉

Hello and thank you for such a nice message - I thought about ways and words to convey how happy I am to have you enjoy my posts because I sure do enjoy yours, but got nowhere beyond a simple thank you. Rest assured I'll definitely keep on supporting your work as there is something enchanting in the way you write that got me transfixed - maybe it is the perspective from which you see things, maybe it is the way you use words to compose what reads like a piece of music, maybe it's everything at once or nothing at all - I can't quite name one specific aspect that makes it so alluring and beautiful, alloting your poems into my personal "resplendence" category along with nice landscape views, stained glass, flowers and 19th century piano compositions. I find myself gravitating to your words over and over again, and I sure am grateful for the serendipity that allowed me to find your blog. So, thank YOU!💙

And now that I had my fan-girl moment (please don't be scared, it's just me riding out the thrill of someone whose work I admire saying they enjoy my work too 😁), let's get onto the asks. I'm going to leave it under "read more."

(note: I think I'm going to scream, no wait, I'm already screaming - I wrote an approx. 5000 characters essay about MCU and tumblr glitched, leaving me with absolutely nothing. Yeah, I know, it was stupid of me not to save the draft after I finished or write it in an actual text editor, alas, here we are. Lessons learned. So just you know why I am answering so late. And why it is brief.)

1 - Ah, the MCU. First of all, the idea of kalokagathos is, unlike God, very much alive in the western society of today. As much as people enjoy heroic stories, they want to see beautiful people in tight costumes even more (when did we as a civilisation decide it is better to cover the body in neoprene rather than observe it nude? It would make more sense to wear a mask and some kind of briefs but nothing else given the unshakeable uniformity of the hero body shape.) The need for perfection is so great we are allowing Marvel heroes to be void of anything resembling a real human personality. This is nicely illustrated in Endgame, where Thor's depression is something we are supposed to laugh at. He is no longer perfect, and we are allowed to laugh at him displaying emotions and putting on some weight, and I hate this with a burning passion. Instead of giving the audience the story of Thor overcoming what more than fifty per cent of all people worldwide suffer from with help of friends and making positive changes, he is a laughing stock. And then there is the problem with heroes coming to existence through a quick process, usually some kind of exposure to radioactivity or a different substance that "mutates their DNA" (which in itself is laughable, but let's leave that aside for today.) There is no instance of people working hard to become strong, they simply get bitten by a rabid spider and get their code changed to wake up as a beefcake in the morning. I think this is a very common symptom of our western lifestyles where fast is not fast enough anymore.

Second of all, the films are void of any profound message because everything else is oversaturated with deep messages. The target group (which is huge judging by the money Disney makes off Marvel) wants to leave their dystopian lives outside the theatre, and watch morally flat characters fight other morally flat characters. We want to engage in an escapist fever dream full of stunning visual effects simply because it is better than anything we could do for those two hours.

Another reason for so many people to love it might be their feeling of having no power over their lives whatsoever. The idea of a hero coming and saving them, however improbable and illogical it is, might bring a certain level of comfort. Films such as MCU ones know this very well and are used as a tool to steer the masses where the government wants them. That is why heroes need to fight aliens to protect the earth - Hollywood past 9/11 is nothing but a tool for pro-war propaganda, and when we look at the parallel of good heroes fighting bad aliens, we don't have to look anymore.

Now, I also want to mention comedic interjections in MCU movies. Watching a film is not unlike travelling by submarine. Where captains like Bergmann immediately drop into the depths of the Marinara trench and stay there for as long as possible, Marvel regularly resurfaces to keep people alert and ready for another part. The comedic break not only serves as a way to divide the story into more digestible chunks, but it is also an attempt to make heroes more human-like and overtakes the comedy market. I have already mentioned that 9/11 has steered Hollywood into propaganda and as such, the comedy genre took a blow. But then, in 2008, Marvel came and gave people something they can laugh about, and voila, people wanted to see more of the silly jokes.

To conclude, the popularity of the MCU stems from the disillusion a large number of people are going through in relation to the dystopian nightmare they live in. All they seek is a visually appealing epic with likeable characters that would allow them not to think about the real world for a moment.

2 - I'm going to post the prompt as a separate post :)

3 - oh thank you :D it wasn't the best idea to list this so I'm happy you left it out

4 - and I am more than happy to provide: being a sanded down shard of glass is not the end of my journey, it is merely a beginning. Where others see nothing but void I walk with a prism in my eye and birdsong in my heart.

5 - thank you so much for the flower, it's so beautiful!!! I love that it looks like a little star - and maybe it really is a star that fell from the night sky for you to find it. By the way, is that your hand in the background holding it upwards? That's so very sweet of you - you managed to position it right in the middle of the picture, so it looks very aesthetically pleasing - thank you so much 💛

I thought about what flower to give you, and picked out three:

this rose because you seem to like yellow flowers. Also, their scent is amazing and maybe the sweet fragrance would be nice and soothing to fall asleep to.

Another flower would be this beautiful peony - and as a fellow bee enthusiast, I thought you would like to see these two ladies grinding hard to get that pollen.

and the last flower I wanted to give you was these chives flowers, simply because they are a lovely shade of lilac and look like fluffy pop candy, but my cat had a different idea and didn't quite approve of me taking pictures in his garden :) so here's the little fiend instead.

thank you again for the birthday wishes - they made me very happy 🤗 and before posting, here are the encouraging words I promised: your sense of humour is amazing! I haven't stopped laughing about Nostramarkus ever since you posted about him - and what I wanted to emphasize is, even if it doesn't feel like it, you are making difference, even if it is only as simple as brightening up someone's day. So keep pushing forward, it's worth it!

[legalbusinessservice]

How to determine HRA to reduce taxes

Introduction :

Eligibility policies to assert deductions in Income Tax HRA section As in step with Section 10(13A) of the Income Tax Act, an character can declare for deductions in taxes on HRA in the event that they fulfil the eligibility situations noted underneath And Hra calculator online

The character have to be salaried.

The HRA have to be part of the revenue component. The character have to stay in rented accommodation. The character have to pay the house hire. This approach that the apartment receipt have to be produced with inside the call of the character.

How lots can one gain from HRA? For salaried personnel staying in rented accommodation, HRA is one of the greater powerful tax saving tools.

The willpower of HRA tax exemption is barely complicated and relies upon on upon three factors:

HRA quantity furnished through the corporation as a revenue component. Actual hire paid through the employee. Basic pay of the employee. The quantity of HRA eligible for tax exemption could be calculated as least of the underneath 3 values:

Actual HRA received – this caps the restrict of what may be tax-exempted. Rent paid – 10% of your revenue (generally approach primary revenue) – essentially exemption begins offevolved simplest over 10% of your primary revenue – that lots must be paid out of your pocket with none tax exemption. 50% of your primary revenue if running in metros, and 40% if running in non-metros – this means that that when first 10% of your primary revenue, you may get exemption as much as every other 50% / 40% of your primary revenue as tax exemption, furnished your House hire allowance is that high (cap implemented through first situation – real HRA received).

Example Let’s take an instance to recognize this better: X is a supervisor running in Mumbai (a metro city). He earns a primary revenue of Rs. 50,000 and receives HRA of Rs. 22,500. He remains in Andheri and will pay a month-to-month hire of Rs. 22,000.

To decide X’s HRA exemption we are able to want to discover the least of the 3 values mentioned as in step with above:

HRA furnished = 2,70,000 (22,50012) Rent paid – 10% of revenue = 2,04,000 ((22,000-five,000)12) 50% of primary revenue = three,00,000 (25,000*12) Since alternative 2 (Rs. 2,04,000) is the minimal of the above 3 values, with a view to be the HRA exemption that X can avail. In different words, X will pay extra hire Rs. 2,04,000 after first 10% of primary revenue, that is inside restrict of his real HRA, and as a result he can get deduction of Rs. 2,04,000 from taxable income. If for example his real HRA changed into Rs. 1,80,000, he may want to have claimed most Rs 1,80,000 as deduction from taxable income.

How to calculate HRA exemption? An Illustration For instance, suppose that X earns Rs. four lakhs, and will pay the yearly hire of Rs. 1.five lakhs, he might be furnished a tax exemption so that it will be the least of:

Tax Exemption

Rs. 60, 000 (@Rs 5000 Per Month, in keeping with the HRA exemption 2016-17 policies, in advance the restrict changed into Rs 2, 000)

Rent paid i.e. 1.five Lakhs – 10% of the whole annual income, i.e. Rs 40, 000= Rs 1, 10, 000 three. 25% of the whole income= Rs 1 Lakh As the least of the 3 is Rs. 40, 000, this will be the HRA tax exemption furnished to X, and the first situation will prevail.

[prokopetz]

Sorry if you've been asked this before, but what would your advice be to someone who wants to try out ttrpg development if they currently have no game design experience? Where should one start?

1. Start small. A lot of people want to write the next Dungeons & Dragons when they’re just starting out, but… well, do yourself a favour and look at the page opposite the table of contents in your Player’s Handbook. Even if you don’t count illustrators, consultants, and the marketing team, thirty-four people are credited for that book alone – and the core rules span multiple books. A game of that scope is several years’ work for a team of dozens. Calibrate your ambitions accordingly.

2. Conversely, don’t start too small. The other big mistake that folks make scope-wise is deciding they want to start with a one-page RPG. This is basically game design hard mode; it’s not impossible to write a one-page RPG that actually hangs together as a functional game as your first project, but you either have to be a very skilled editor or be prepared to do a lot of playtesting and revising to pull it off. Give yourself some breathing room.

I find a good starting point for your first game is to aim for something in the 4–16 page range – or 1000–5000 words, if you’re not aiming to publish in print. (For comparison, this response is about 850 words long.) If you find yourself exceeding that, reassess and see where things are getting away from you – you’ve probably got a case of scope creep on your hands.

3. Start with premise. If you’re into mechanics, you might be thinking “hey, I’ve come up with a neat dice trick, I should try to build a game around it”. That’s a good way to end up with a bunch of elegant math that doesn’t actually add up to anything playable. Focus on what your game is about, in descriptive terms, and if you find an opportunity to slot in a neat dice trick, bonus.

4. Be specific. If you don’t have a clear idea of what a typical session of your game is supposed to look like, that’s going to come through in your writing, and people are going to look at it and go: “That’s neat, but what do I do with it? What do player character actually do?” Your game should have an answer for them! D&D’s core premise, for example, is a fantasy heist caper: 3–5 dysfunctional weirdos with complementary skill-sets break into a secure location and rob it blind. A narrow premise is better than a broad one when you’re starting out, and for heaven’s sake don’t try to design a “generic” or “universal” game on your first go; all game rules encode baked-in assumptions about how the game ought to be played, and if you try to get rid them, all you’re going to do is write a game whose baked-in assumptions you yourself don’t understand.

5. Do your homework. There’s a phenomenon in tabletop RPG circles called the “fantasy heartbreaker”, which is when somebody has a bright idea they think is going to revolutionise the hobby, but because their actual experience with the hobby consists of having read one specific edition of D&D, what they end up producing is just a very slightly modified version of D&D – and most of the “innovations” they think they’ve come up with are just clumsily reinventing features that have existed in games that aren’t D&D for thirty years, to boot. It’s by no means restricted to fantasy – you see a similar trajectory in other genres when novice game designers start with some popular non-D&D game as their sole point of reference.

The only real thing to do for it is to expand your horizons, both to see how other games have tackled premises that resemble yours, and to expand your mental library of game design approaches. Actual play experience with a wide variety of games is best, of course, but if it’s not immediately practical for you to get it, you should at least read up. I’ve recently put together a reading list of free and pay-what-you-want titles I think are worth checking out if you’re not in a position to splurge on rulebooks at the moment.

6. Try for a game that’s aimed at episodic or one-shot scenarios. Supporting long-form campaigns adds a whole extra layer of considerations and complications, and guidelines for advancing or levelling up are a stone bastard to get right even for experienced designers. Save yourself some headaches.

7. Don’t spin your wheels endlessly iterating on refining the rules without actual play feedback to back it up. Playtesting is the most important part of the design process. If you don’t have your own group, see if some of your online friends will volunteer to run a chat-room session or three and report back to you, or at least recruit some beta readers. The best time to start playtesting/beta reading depends on how fast you work, of course, but personally, I find that if a game has been in a vaguely playable state for a couple of weeks without any major overhauls, it’s time to stop tinkering and start listening.

Beyond that, there’s not a lot I can say in terms of generic advice – anything further would depend on what particular sort of game you’re trying to write!

[steve0discusses]

The Live Action Fullmetal Alchemist Movie Part 6: Let’s Kill Hughes

Hey guys, I’ve been having some issues with the blog not...updating my drafts. So in case you’re wondering, that’s where I disappeared to. Give a round of applause to the support team for finding a solution until it gets fixed but as of right now I’m on like a private window with my extensions turned off and writing this from both tumblr and a LibreOffice document. Hello ads, nice to see you back.

Last we left off, we were a hop and skip away to lab 5. In the anime, this was a sequence where there was a bunch of fighting with suits of armor, and they kept that in this movie, but...not the people you think would be fighting are going to be fighting.

Listen I’m not like super knowledgeable about the world of Matte painting, but I like that they’ve unintentionally made this world building where whoever is in charge of making these red bricks basically owns everyone’s nuts. Everything is made out of the same red bricks. Like I know this is a show about homunculi ruling the world but I feel like the red brick guy is hellllllla more egregious. Freakin Monsanto over here.

I assume they had a 3d model and was like “we can just keep using it” and damn, they sure did. And inside of this brick building is, unsurprisingly a lot more red brick (although I think this is partially, if not entirely, an actual real life set.)

This next part is...such a lesson in pacing. Not necessarily a lesson to follow, but definitely a lesson to learn from maybe their non-example.

(watch Hughes die under the cut)

And what’s interesting is that there were a lot of good lines in this upcoming segment. There were a lot of good moments—bu there’s just so many. Maybe too many. You gotta prune your script occasionally, it’s like a tomato plant.

Like I’ve been doing a stress garden to cope with quarantine and Covid and 3+ months of life endangering wildfires, and I learned that you gotta prune the sucker vines off your tomatoes, although sucker vines can also make tomatoes. It sucks to do because I love tomatoes, and I want as many tomatoes as possible, but when you prune the plant, you get bigger better tomatoes that are more worthwhile than the suckers that can infect your plant and make it really sick.

Sorry that made me sound like 5000 years old with that gardening analogy. If you need me to solve your small town murder mysteries, I’m ready.

So it’s like...kind of tragic that it came together as kind of nonsensical when you can tell that it’s so close to being something better.

Like we have some reason up to this point to believe that Ed would have a freak out here...but like...a sobbing on the floor screaming at the walls type of freak out? Was there enough time devoted to this blow up, or did he walk into this room and immediately start screaming? Because he sure did walk immediately into this room and start screeching like a broken bird.

Like last recap, which was about 2 minutes ago in screentime, was this fun and quirky montage with Hughes. Now we’re sobbing into this rusty factory.

And I know what’s going on because I’ve seen the anime, but if you haven’t seen it—would this emotional break down make any sense? We were told by Dr Marcoh, “check out lab 5,” but we were only going to this factory on kind of a wish and a prayer. I really wonder if people who don’t know this show could follow past this point.

And then while we’re still adjusting to “yo, Ed just took it from a 2 to a 10 like immediately” Al is like “Hey I noticed no one is paying attention to me, and I have to lay a wicked fart:”

and then both brother’s just have a freak out. Gotta all be freaking out in this random ass Unity asset that was probably also used for some college grad’s first battle royale.

Pacing is just everything. And what’s SO HARD about Full Metal Alchemist is that there really is a lot of content to cover, there’s a lot of emotions to go through, and when you only have about 7 minutes to cover what was about 3-4 episodes, if I remember correctly, it’s kind of a zany mess.

And if you were going into this movie hoping they wouldn’t illustrate Al as a large idiot baby, then you share the sentiments of most people who saw this movie. Al is like...kind of reduced to a whiny big baby and is...not cute. Like Al is low key kind of menacing throughout this movie, not just because he has this CGI armor thing going on, but also because Al is...so impressionable and unhinged.

Something that I didn’t appreciate enough when I watched the anime was just how important Barry the Chopper was for Al’s logical character development.

Yo...These bangs…

...I’ve realized that every show I recap here just has the worst hair styles. I honestly never thought much about hair at all until I watched like 200 hours of Yugioh and all of this movie and also 6 seasons of Once Upon a Time which featured some LOOKS (but only recapped like 3 episodes, sorry if I got some of y’all excited. That was when we had no reason to cap everything because the capping community for Once was very alive and very exciting.)

By hitting him with a wrench (Al does not feel pain, ps, so he doesn’t need to be hunched over like this) Winry reminds Al that Ed would not risk his life for a fake brother (which may be a line from the anime or the manga but I don’t remember) and crying just...a lot.

Like it felt as if she had to shoot all of this out of order. Same with Ed’s freak out here. Movie’s aren’t really shot in succession and it’s up to the director to make it feel coherent and logical...this felt scattered, like the actors really didn’t know what was happening in the scenes leading up to it so they just cranked it to 11.

And then I guess Ed was either so insulted that Al punched him or was so upset that Al made Winry cry (again, this movie really tries to sell the EdxWinry ship and from me that’s a really big compliment), that Ed just started laying punches to extend a fight scene that was kind over before it started.

But symbolically there is a lot nice things going on here, Ed only uses his fleshy hand so he bleeds all over Al, hurting himself as much he’s hurting his brother. Implying more than just this fight, but suggesting that their whole journey of trying to find this sorcerer’s stone is just going to hurt both of them in their quest to save the other.

And then Al says something along the line of “it hurts!” to infer that he’s got this broken heart which is when they both finally just freakin stop.

Such a shame the pacing, which was a mix of too quick, and too many tomatoes, kind of made it hella blindsiding.

Again this was so many episodes of FMA and they stuffed it into so few minutes, it’s wild.

Especially since Ed is like...he’s cast as an adult! He’s an adult! At no point in the movie so far have they called him a kid, and they’re not pretending that he is one. But like...he acts like such a child because in the original, he was one. And, while this movie steps so far away from the source material, if should have committed and either stepped completely away or committed completely. Of course “should” is one of those things where we’ll just never know. A wish into the ether of hindsight being 20/20.

But lets get to the thing that you all came here for. This is where this movie gets BONKERS:

So Hughes actually draws out a pentagram between the different places in Armestrias, including Ishvaal, leading us to think that he’s figured out the whole dealio of turning the country into an alchemy circle. But, for some reason only helps him find the real lab 5.

It didn’t...that’s a different thing.

And it has been a long time since I’ve seen the ending of this movie—and maybe it was so offhand that I forgot if they actually do bring up turning the country into an alchemy circle--watch me eat my words, it could happen—but yo, we are finally killing Hughes—but we’re over halfway through this movie. And you may wonder...so uh...what...then what could possibly happen? There’s too much anime left!

Now I’m glad they kept this scene really close to the anime, although I haven’t watched the anime in a hot minute. It’s kind of an iconic scene so you don’t forget.

Like I do genuinely enjoy the campy parts where they were bringing up some of my favorite nostalgia of the original.

and then when you are like “ah, this is exactly the same as the anime. I can relax and watch as all my expectations are fully realized.” This twist happens.

YAH.

It’s a change!

So in the anime we had a really fun arc where we were trying to save Lieutenant Ross for being framed for killing Hughes. It’s probably my favorite part of Full Metal Alchemist, actually, it was so clever and a really thrilling chase. It was also like...half of season one.

Anyway, they cut it. They reduced half a season into 7 minutes. I know that, because each of these recaps is about 15 minutes of the movie.

You may look at this recap and be like “wait...this all happened in 15 minutes??” because yeah, this all happened in 15 minutes.

The same squad of people we see in every single scene of soldiers comes up to arrest Ed, which is weird, because I thought this band of soldiers was the military under Cl. Mustang’s command so like…shouldn’t they be arresting themselves? Mustang was over the command of more than 2 people. If we are suspicious of Mustang’s buddies then everyone in this movie would be in trouble.

And that’s when I realized that these guys were just unnamed soldiers and not a part of Mustang’s band. They only had like this many extras and just hoped we wouldn’t keep track of who is who, but I KNOW I’ve seen these guys this whole time. There are only like 6 people in this army. I see you movie magic—I see what you’re trying to do.

Anyway, Ed gets thrown into an old timey opera house that occasionally gets to be used for Middle School graduations. Or maybe also a mortuary where they charge you for funerals.

Like I know it’s supposed to be the capital building but like...this looks so weird when it’s live action. I remember the anime had this kinda feel to it but in live action it’s like…

...this is a weird ass capital building…Why do they have curtains like a Granny Holiday Inn in Reno, Nevada?

Thankfully, Hawkeye is here to explain to Ed what just happened because we, the movie viewers, were kind of surprised by that plot twist.

Like there were many ways you can condense half a season into 15 minutes, and I dunno if I would have just changed the murderer. It is a solution you can do. You can just point blame on Mustang and skip that whole Ross segment but like….

…then why write the movie?

Obviously, they had to make the movie, it had already been funded, people were really excited about the idea, and I do not envy the people that had to hack and slash with the Full Metal Alchemist script, but it is interesting what they decided was important to the original content, and what was unimportant. All that stuff that showed how Mustang was brilliant and two steps ahead of everyone else? Unimportant. All that stuff we had that showed how Mustang cares a lot about protecting other people and also cares about Ed and Al? Unimportant.

It really changes the dynamic, and it’s kind of fascinating to go into this cold because it’s been like...a year for me since I’ve watched it...and just see how different everything is without all those supporting characters that when I watched the anime I just assumed were mostly useless (Though fun). Turns out they all had a pretty significant part of making me care about Ed, about Mustang, about Al, about all my main characters.

FMA is very character driven, and this movie is mostly just...plot driven.  There’s kind of a great debate in literature about plot driven vs character driven. Movies and TV tend to be very plot driven, because they are very expensive to make, so they follow pre-formatted plot beats like “Save the Cat” or “The Heroes Journey” and other ones (there’s several to choose from).

They’ve made a fine science out of at what point a TV show should introduce the main, at what point they should suffer doubt, at what point they should shun their hero’s journey, etc etc. They know it down to the page number of the scripts they are writing. I know this, because it’s readily available on the internet and people fight about it all the time. This is why a show may suffer developing a character—because they just don’t have time and they just don’t have the resources to do something out of the box. Movies doubly so, because every minute of film can cost thousands of dollars.

What’s interesting about this is that FMA, the original FMA, does follow these beats. It was a manga sold by a huge publisher so it had to follow those beats. But, it has managed to do it while still being character driven. Yo, that’s so hard to do. This story was already written to be hyper condensed and structured when it was made into a Manga, and then it was condensed again for an anime, and then it was condensed yet again for this movie. It’s like a game of telephone, and at one end you have a very character driven story, and then at the other, it’s just totally plot.

Like it’s just a really huge risk to take. This was really, really risky.

PS did you miss Shou? Did you think we’d be done with Shou Tucker? No. Because this movie is gonna end at some point and rather than introduce other people...we’re just gonna stick with Shou and only have one miniboss.

(It has a freakin radiator in it?)

So then this next part happens and it’s low key hilarious.

The whole time.

Mustang and Hawkeye knew what lab 5 was this entire time but Ed just never asked for some reason despite working with those two for what is inferred to be YEARS since his childhood.

Hey PS, did you miss that brick building? Because it’s back.

Anyway, Mustang decides to take this underground where we can recycle the tech crew posing as extras that we used in the shot above us. Would not be surprised if a few of these are someone’s husband or wife on set.

Usually when I watch a movie I don’t get this feeling so much. But this movie...the latter half is like...EMPTY.

...this is going to be all movies made during Covid, I just realized…

Mustang is stopped by an angry Lieutenant Ross, and then we get this series of events.

And when you’re like “...Sorry?” Mustang’s like “I can make it weirder.”

And he just, without any warning or anything, lights Lieutenant Ross on fire. Multiple times, and it’s pretty intense and everyone who’s holding a gun just watches it happen is like…

...well I guess it’s too late to just shoot the guy...

…and like do you seriously not carry around a fire extinguisher when you are trying to manhunt Mustang? This is the one guy you want to wear fireproof clothes around. You have the technology. You at least have the technology for buckets of water. Like no one want to throw a blanket on her?

Just want to...watch? I guess?

Mustang just looks like a nut from this series of events instead of a genius--which is what I think they were originally going for. The pacing does that, youknow? Pacing.

And, out of the corpse pile stands Envy.

Envy has a pretty good look, I appreciated his whole look and that unlike the anime where you only find out Envy is a guy because someone told you on a forum somewhere and you were like “wait WHAT?” the movie is live action so you won’t make that mistake and embarrass yourself online.

Ed has only ever seen Lust once, and she walked in from off screen, stabbed a guy, and walked off. He’s just like...having a time because he’s done zero research into homunculi, and really, at no point in this movie are we going to give him time to figure it out.

Also, there’s this shot where Lust and Gluttony just walk in from behind them in the tunnel and it’s like…

….so no one noticed these two just hanging out back there?

It’s so freakin funny. This movie is gold. I love it.

Now If you just got here, this is a link to read all these recaps in chrono order:

https://steve0discusses.tumblr.com/tagged/fma/chrono

Have a good one, and stay safe! 2021 has been...weird nuts...and it’s still January somehow??? Weird times. Overall, please stay safe, it’s weird out there.

Also, if you’re like “I don’t remember this scene actually” here’s the original Hughes dies scene that inspired the movie (since the movie definitely was like “we’re only going inspired for this one nerds, get mad”)--some shots were inspired cut for cut.

And obvi this is on Youtube so it’ll probably get taken down eventually, but that’s why it’s flipped.

[alice-beaumont-ravenclaw]

Grief (Pt. 1)

A/N #1: Finally wrote the first part of my “Rowan’s death” story. It’s around 5000 words long, so I divided it into two parts to make it easier to read. This is based on what went on in the game, with the original dialogue mostly intact, but I added stuff to fill in what went on between various part of the chapter and to better illustrate Alice’s reaction.

--------------

"Avada Kedavra!"

As she heard those words, Alice couldn't help but stare at the green light that was coming out of Rakepick's wand. It felt like everything was in slow-motion, the light slowly making its way to Ben. As she was about to close her eyes, she saw a flash of blue and black pushing Ben aside, the green light hitting it instead.

"ROWAN!" she heard herself shout.

"No!" she heard Ben say as he stared in disbelief.

"Khanna..." she heard Merula whisper.

She looked from Rowan's body to where Rakepick was standing, feeling the rage growing in her body.

"We warned you that you owed 'R' a friend's life. Consider that debt collected," said Rakepick with her usual smug grin.

Alice felt herself getting up on her feet and lunging at her as she let out an animalistic growl. Before she could reach Rakepick, she disapparated, leaving Alice grasping at air. Realizing she was gone, her shoulders slumped as she turned her head to see her best friend's body, lifeless.

"No..." mumbled Ben as he approached the body with the others.

Alice, Merula, and Ben knelt next to Rowan, observing her, hoping, perhaps, that she was not...

"She's not breathing," said Merula, her eyes widening.

"No, no... There's got to be some spell... There has to be something we can do!" said Alice, shaking Rowan's body, hoping to wake her up. "This can't be the end... Rowan can't be... dead."

"The Killing Curse... There's no coming back..." replied Merula in a soft voice, still staring at Rowan's corpse.

"Rowan... She's gone," whimpered Ben.

They stared in disbelief at the young Ravenclaw's body. None of them had even considered this turn of event. None of them knew what Rowan had been doing in the forest. This couldn't be real...

"I'll go fetch a professor," said Merula, slowly getting up.

"We'll take her... I mean... We'll take Rowan to the edge of the forest. Just in case Dementors came back. Ok, Ben?" said Alice, looking at the Gryffindor boy.

Ben nodded. Alice took Rowan under her shoulders while Ben took her legs. Slowly, following Merula, they made their way out of the Forest. They laid Rowan down on the soft grass at the edge of the Forest as Merula began running toward the castle. Ben and Alice sat beside the body in silence, both of them still in shock. Alice wasn't yet fully realizing what had happened, while Ben slowly realized someone had died protecting him.

About 20 minutes later, they saw Merula running back, followed by the Heads of House, Hagrid, and Dumbledore. As they saw Rowan's body on the ground, they all let out a gasp, except for Hagrid, who let out a sob. While Flitwick and McGonagall were both making sure that Alice and Ben were uninjured, Merula explained what had happened to the other Professors. Hagrid gently took Rowan in his arms, cradling her body as he let out a few sobs. They all slowly made their way back to the castle.

When they entered the castles, Hagrid and the professors made their way to the infirmary with Madam Pomfrey, while the three students walked toward their respective Common Rooms. Merula went down to the gloomy dungeons, while Alice and Ben went up the silent staircase until they reached the fifth floor, where they separated without a word.

Alice answered the riddle before entering the empty Common Room where a fire was still burning in the fireplace. Even with the fire, Alice felt cold as she made her way to her dormitory. She was thankful both her roommates were asleep when she entered. She didn't feel like talking. She didn't feel like being asked where Rowan was.

The next morning, after a restless sleep, she was awoken by Tulip shaking her.

"Alice! Alice! Something is going on! We are supposed to go to the Great Hall for an announcement! Rumour is that someone died last night. I thought it might be you until I remembered seeing you when I woke up. Who do you think it is? By the way, where's Rowan?" asked Tulip as she looked at the empty bed next to Alice before looking back at her. Alice simply looked down. "Oh dear..." whispered Tulip.

Alice got out of bed and got dressed before following Tulip to the Great Hall. When she entered, she noticed the tables were gone and that the Hall was darker than usual, with only daylight and a few torches providing some light. As she made her way toward the front, she overheard Barnaby whispering: "Everyone is here... So it's true."

"I can't believe Rowan died last night," replied Ismelda.

"I heard that Alice, Merula, and Ben were there..." shared Liz.

When she finally reached the front with Tulip, she noticed everyone around her was either crying or looked sad. All except for Merula, Ben, and herself. Perhaps the sadness would come later for them, she thought. Perhaps they were still getting over the shock of what they had seen.

"This doesn't seem real... The idea that Rowan is gone..." she said in a soft voice.

"Gone forever," replied Ben, emotionless, Alice feeling a chill going down her spine as she heard those words.

"It only just happened. You're in shock. We all are," said Tulip as she approached the group of three.

"It's different for us. We watched it happen," pointed out Merula.

"I still don't understand how... Why Rowan was even there... It happened so fast..." said Alice, looking down.

"Actually... Alice, I think I may know why Rowan was in the forest last night," said Penny as she approached her friend.

"Dumbledore's here," whispered Andre before Alice could say anything.

Dumbledore made his way to the platform where the other teachers were standing and stood behind his lectern.

"Penny, what do you mean you know why Rowan was in the forest?" whispered Alice, hoping she could get an explanation before Dumbledore's speech.

"Let's talk later. In private," replied Penny, looking at Dumbledore.

Alice let out a sigh before looking up at the Headmaster.

"Last night, we suffered an unimaginable loss at the hands of unimaginable evil," started Dumbledore. "Rowan Khanna, a devoted student and friend, sacrificed her life to save another's." 

As he said those words, Alice noticed Ben looking down. He seemed frustrated.

"There is no more noble deed," continued Dumbledore. "So today, we will not waste words on Rowan Khanna's killer, whom I assure you will be brought to justice."

"You can count on that," muttered Merula through gritted teeth, before Liz gave her a nudge with her elbow so that she would keep quiet.

"Today, we gather as one Hogwarts community to grieve, remember and honour Rowan and her final heroic act. Grief takes many forms. And it takes time," said Dumbledore, looking at all the students gathered in front of him. "Sadness... Fear... Anger... There are no wrong feelings. It is important in trying times that we be kind and patient with one another. And never forget that Rowan Khanna died a hero."

Hearing that Rowan was dead from the Headmaster, Alice felt a shiver down her spine. It was as if, until now, she was hoping it was perhaps just a horrible nightmare. Hearing some of her friends next to her sobbing made it all too real. Part of her just wanted to run out of the Great Hall...

"Some of you may know it was Rowan's ambition to teach ay Hogwarts one day. By constantly pursuing new knowledge and instilling a love of learning in ourselves and others, we can honour Rowan's dream. For now, I have temporarily suspended new lessons to give everyone time to grieve. But remember that if we let Rowan's noble goal be a guiding light in these dark times, then, just like this light," said the Headmaster as he raised his lighted up wand, "the memory of Rowan Khanna - a clever, brave, driven, and loyal companion - will shine on."

At the end of his speech, everyone slowly raised their wands, lightening them up in honour and in memory of Rowan.

After a moment, students started to walk out of the Great Hall, wondering what to do with themselves. Alice wanted to leave, but she knew Penny wanted to tell her something important, so she waited next to the door, looking at Penny, who was comforting her sister. As she stood there, lost in her thoughts, she felt someone's hand on her shoulder. She turned around to see Charlie before he hugged her. She stood there, not reciprocating the hug, as she felt like she was out of breath, needing space. Charlie, realizing she was standing still, took a step back, looking worried.

"Alice... Are you ok?" asked Charlie.

"Not really..." softly replied Alice, as she looked at the floor, rubbing her arm.

"Of course... That was a stupid question to ask," said Charlie, rubbing the back of his neck.

"No... It was not. It shows concern," said Alice, looking up into Charlie's warm brown eyes.

"I am concerned. You just witnessed something terrible. I'm surprised you're not in the infirmary," replied Charlie.

"Rowan would want me to be strong. Even when I had a cold, she would drag me to our classes," said Alice, a strained smile appearing on her lips because of the memory.

"True... But still, I'm worried. I..." started Charlie before being interrupted by Penny.

"Alice? Can we talk?" asked Penny.

"Yeah... I'll talk to you later," said Alice to Charlie before walking away with Penny.

Charlie looked at his girlfriend walking away, wrinkling his brows as he pursed his lips.

When Alice and Penny finally found an empty corridor, the young Hufflepuff stopped and turned to her friend. 

"Alice... I'm glad we can talk in private. How are you holding up?" asked Penny.

"Numb? It's like it hasn't completely sunk in yet that Rowan is gone... Even if Dumbledore said she was..." replied Alice, letting out a sigh. She would probably get that question from everyone she knew.

"I know. It's as if Rowan could walk by us right now, off to study," said Penny, her shoulders slumping.

"It happened so fast, Penny... Instant," replied Alice as she felt a tightness in her chest.

"I can't imagine what you've been through, Alice. Dumbledore said there are no wrong feelings," said Penny, trying to comfort her friend.

"No wrong feelings and so many questions..." said Alice, looking out the window toward the Forbidden Forest.

"Like, why was Rowan in the Forbidden Forest last night?" asked Penny, following her friend's gaze.

"Yes. You said you knew," said Alice, looking back at Penny.

"I think so. Do you remember that night Bill taught us the Sea Urchin Jinx?" asked Penny.

"Vaguely? Remind me," said Alice, scrunching her eyebrows, trying to figure out what that jinx had to do with Rowan's death.

"It was after Madam Pomfrey was petrified. Bill kept you, Ben, Merula, and Charlie to talk about the Cursed Vaults... And Rowan and I wanted to stay and help, too. But Bill wanted to keep it to just those of you who were in the Buried Vaults with Rakepick," said Penny.

"It was for your own safety, yours and Rowan's," explained Alice.

"I know. You told me about 'R' the day in the Courtyard when Ben cast Langlock on Charlie. So I understood. But Rowan didn't understand..." said Penny before looking away. "Oh Alice... I've done something terrible..."

"Penny, tell me. Please, tell me everything," said Alice, pleading, as she sat down on a bench.

"Well, you remember what you told us before Ben langlocked Charlie in the Courtyard? That the wizard that escaped on his way to Azkaban was part of 'R,' which is not a person but a dangerous secret organization of which Rakepick is a member, and that he was after you," said Penny, sitting down next to the young Curse-Breaker.

"Yeah..." said Alice, raising an eyebrow.

"I told Rowan what I knew about 'R' and Rakepick. I know you wanted to keep 'R' a secret from anyone who wasn't in the Buried Vault..." said Penny, looking down.

"For your protection. I doubt I'd have told you if you weren't with Charlie when I'd needed to tell him," pointed out Alice.

"I know. And I explained to Rowan that I was only talking about 'R' so she could understand what you're facing," said Penny, looking back at Alice.

"And did it help Rowan understand why I'd been so preoccupied?" asked Alice.

"Yes, but it also made her want to protect you the way you're always protecting us. So she had been secretly following you from a distance," explained Penny.

"Ever since you both left that classroom?" asked Alice.

"She told me that was her plan. It would explain why she was in the Forbidden Forest," replied Penny before letting out a sigh, her shoulders slumping.

"I was so focused on what we were doing, I had no idea Rowan was following me, watching over me..." said Alice, looking down as she shook her head.

"If I hadn't told Rowan about 'R,' then what happened wouldn't have happened," said Penny, sniffing.

"You can't blame yourself, Penny," said Alice, looking back at her friend as she rested her hand on hers.

"But who else is there to blame?" asked Penny.

Alice let out a sigh as she looked away. "Rakepick is the one who killed Rowan, but... I blame myself. If not for me, no one would know about 'R.' Rowan never would've been following me. Perhaps it would have been better if Rowan had never met me at all..."

"Don't say that. Rowan valued your friendship more than anything," said Penny as she took Alice's hand between hers, squeezing it lightly. "I hope it wasn't a mistake, telling you all of this."

"You've only told the truth. Now at least I know why Rowan was there last night. She was being the best she'd been to me from the start, looking out for me one last time..." said Alice, looking outside the window behind her as she took a deep breath.

"I don't mean to interrupt," said a voice behind Alice. 

Alice turned around to see Tonks, who clearly seemed uncomfortable.

"I mean, I know I'm interrupting... You may have even heard already..." continued Tonks, rubbing the back of her neck as she looked away from the two girls.

"It's alright. What is it, Tonks?" asked Alice. Life didn't stop just because Rowan's life had...

"Everyone's to report to their Common Rooms for an important announcement," said Tonks.

"About Rowan?" asked Penny, surprised.

"I'm not sure," shrugged Tonks. "I'm not sure about anything anymore. Especially with you, Alice... Do we talk about it? Do you even want to talk about it?"

"Rowan is your friend, too, Tonks," said Alice. "I mean... Was your friend... Our friend..."

"Yes... But not in the same way that Rowan was your friend," pointed out Tonks.

"It's true. Everyone knows, it's always been you and Rowan, from our first day here..." remarked Penny.

"From my very first day at Hogwarts..." mumbled Alice, looking down once again as she recalled the first time she met Rowan in Diagon Alley.

Penny and Tonks didn't say a word as they looked at their friend. She clearly was struggling to cope with what had happened, but she seemed to bottle up all her emotions. She was still trying to be the strong one. She was still trying to be the protector. How could they tell her she could let go? That it was ok to grieve. That there was no shame in crying, in showing emotions. That they were there if she needed to talk. They just knew all too well that she would fake a smile, say everything would be fine, and walk away. The only person she ever seemed to confide in was Rowan...

"Well... I suppose we should go to our Common Rooms, hear this announcement..." finally said Tonks.

"Yes, let's go," said Alice as she stood up along with Penny.

They made their way together until they reached the staircases, the Hufflepuffs going down, and Alice continuing up on her own.

-------

A/N #2: Hope you enjoyed it! This story is partly inspired by the “Low Energy” prompt from @yantarnii 2018 Inktober challenge. Part 2 is here.

[cse6441-blog]

Week 4 Morning Lecture

Kahoot

Started off with a Kahoot. I did quite well on this one, placing around 20th. I however got tripped up with the following question:

If step A takes 10 bit of work, and step 8 takes 20 bits - how much to do both steps A then B?

The way Richard reasoned this is to think of bits kind of like digits. If you had 20 digits of money and added that to a 10 digit number, how many digits would the result be?

The answer would still be 20, the more significant of the two. i.e. 10000000 + 5000 = 10005000 (bigger number)

Another question that resurfaced from last lecture was the MOST DIFFICULT RISK for a Security Engineer to analyse, being a Low Probability and High Impact Risk. This is mostly due to it being so infrequent that it’s hard to predict and break down when exactly it will occur.

Finally, the last question involved a One-Time-Pad decryption based on a given encryption using the same pad. The way I attacked this question was to look for any matching clues. For this, both words had the letter ‘A’ in it, so I was able to narrow that down to two letters. Then the last letter mapped to a rotation of 1 letter, so all I needed to do was also rotate the last letter of ‘HAPPY’: ‘Y’ -> ‘X’.

Sub Ciphers (+ BoS)

How many bits of work to brute force a substitution cipher?

Well starting from the front:

The first letter has 26 possible choices

The second has 25 combinations

The third has 24 ...

So all up, it’s around 4*10^26 bits of work In binary this will be around 2^87 (87 bits of work).

That’s quite a LOT! To illustrate how strong that is, we can take an example of a modern laptop. Let’s say one which is 16GHz (can do 16 million instructions per second). With a machine like this, if it ran for 2^30 years (1073741824), it would be able to do 90 bits of work. It just goes to show the scale of how much 87 bits really is. It would be completely ridiculous to try and brute force it since you would need to try it for A BILLION YEARS or have one billion computers trying it.

However, this is so ridiculously big because Brute Force is the WORST. In reality, we know that it’s not that hard to break substitution ciphers and it definitely doesn’t take a billion years.

This is because there are PATTERNS in the data. That is, the English language contains frequent letters and common words that speed up our ability to decipher a cryptogram. These patterns are the ENEMY OF ENTROPY.

And as security engineers, we love entropy (randomness).

So because English has rules to help people communicate, there is an inherent weakness in trying to use it to encrypt information. You can easily decipher the patterns due ot the lack of entropy in English.

In fact, attackers will skip this process altogether since brute force is the worst, they instead use something like a rainbow table which holds a gigantic list of all the common passwords frequently used by people.

Mid-west Encryption Problem

Suppose we are back in the mid-west. And only basic encryption exists. If we wanted to send a message through banks via telegraph, how would we do so securely?

Let’s say someone came to us to want to withdraw money. How the process would work, since we don’t actually have their money stored in a vault in the back, is that we have to wire to the headquarters, confirm they have enough money in their account to withdraw, and receive confirmation to give them the money.

For an attacker, we don’t really care if people can hear the message, we just don’t want it to be tampered with. This cryptographic property is INTEGRITY (the ability to detect if a message has been modified)

However, it was just basic encryption, a Man In The Middle could tap into the line and listen in on the conversation. Even if they couldn’t encrypt it, they could simply record the message and play it back (as a Replay Attack) and reap the reward multiple times.

So how do we solve this..? Read the next post to find out the answer!

Hashing

Hashing is essentially summarising one thing with another thing. For example, your ID card - it summarises your identity using a few bits of information about you; name, dob, address, school, etc.

A hash is generated using a HASHING FUNCTION and this can be anything that helps summarise a bunch of information into one.

In the lecture, Richard took to the idea of playing cards as an identifier. The hashing function was of the following:

If you were in the extended course (6841) you were RED

Post-graduates are Hearts

Undergraduates would be Diamonds

If you were in the normal course (6441) you were BLACK

Post-graduates are Spades

Undergraduates would then be Clubs

And as for the value of the card it would follow that:

0 - King, A - 1, ...

Then Richard asked the front row what their hash was and it didn’t take very long at all for a HASH COLLISION to occur (maybe about 6 people in). This being that at least two people had the same card. This seems like it would be an incredibly difficult thing, with there being 4 suits and 13 available numbers, but this Birthday Paradox actually yields surprising results.

Examining the situation:

Hash Collisions occur when you have MORE INFORMATION than that which you are mapping to a hash

In this case, there were more people than unique hashes

Another issue is the lack of ENTROPY

In such a course of UNSW students

Most of the students were undergraduate

And there was a higher populus of 6441 students

Therefore a collision was almost guaranteed

Another overlooked point is that a Birthday Attack (collision) is increasingly more probable in a small set with the MORE PEOPLE you examine. This is because with each new person, you’re comparing their hash with everyone in the previous set. So if you have a fixed hash size, the chance goes from 1/52 to 2/52, 3/52 and so on...

In fact, once the SAMPLE SIZE is the square root (of the hash size) then the chance of a collision becomes 50/50.

[flirting-with-psychology]

What features would you want your house to have if you could avoid all the technical difficulties involved in building them/installing them? Are we talking things that actually exist though? Because a self-cleaning, spider-repellent house would be nice

If you had to describe tastes without using any taste-specific descriptive words, how would you do it? I guess I’d describe other experiences that the taste reminds me of. Or use sense of smell, since that corresponds well

What is the effect on you of having people physically nearby, if they’re not interacting with you? Kind of the worst of both worlds because I have to be putting on my public self which can be draining but I don’t get the reward of social interaction. Also makes me feel like I don’t fit in

What simple action do you wish most could be automated by a small device? Fuck idk

If you could change the color of your blood with no other effect, would you do it? No, because you can see the color of blood in your skin, it would make my skin a weird color

Do you tend to tell more stories about things that happened to you long ago or recently? Recently

Would you rather come up with the core of a brilliant invention, or find someone else’s design and bring it to completion and usability? Come up with the core

Is walking more tiring for you, or talking? Walking

Suppose a cat started speaking to you and you could understand it. What would you do first? Ask it a bunch of questions

When your mind is fixated on something, does it more manifest as your mind coming back to the same topic throughout the day, or being unable to change its focus at all for a long period? Both lol

When you read a book, does a fixed mental image (from a movie or illustration) improve or hurt your experience of the characters? Depends if I liked the movie version of the character

Which of “greasy, salty, bitter, sweet, spicy, bland” do you react most strongly against? Bitter

After you finish a good book or movie, how much do you want sequels compared to an equally good and independent book/movie? Depends on how it ended. If it had a good ending as a standalone book/movie, I don’t want unnecessary sequels, but if there’s more story to tell I’m happy to have it. I just don’t like sequels that are only there for the sake of making money

If you could change your name to anything whatsoever for one year, and there would be no social/practical consequences to the change or the name itself, would you do it, and if so what name would you pick? I’ve already changed my name

When you’re completely exhausted, do you prefer to be around people or not? Usually not

When you share responsibility for a bad event with a lot of other people, is it nobody’s fault or all of your faults? All your faults, but there is diffusion of responsibility

When you introspect, how much and what do you see about how your thoughts form, and how reliable do you think that information is? Idfk bro, I struggle with that

How would you decide what your favorite word is? Do you focus on meaning or sound more? I don’t have a favorite word

How much would you have to be paid to spend a week completely alone in The Woods and completely bereft of any belongings or trace of civilization? (you would be protected supernaturally from physical harm from hunger, thirst, and cold, but not discomfort) Maybe like $5000

Would you prefer to write essays by typing, writing, or dictation, assuming the tech for dictation were perfected? Typing

Brainstorm the design of a planet terraformed purely for artistic purposes. It wouldn’t be round, it would be shaped in a cool way

Would you rather burn to death over the course of an hour, or lose your sanity over the course of weeks after an accident makes you unable to see, feel, smell, taste, hear, or move? Burn to death

How much would you enjoy watching your life turned into a movie? I’d actually be pretty curious

If aliens came to earth and brought you to an alien zoo, and you knew there was no way of escaping or bargaining, what sort of accommodations would you ask for your cell? Comfortable living conditions, visitation, wifi

Imagine 1-way teleporters existed, but were expensive enough you’d need to spend a lot of time saving in order to afford one. Would you? Not sure. If it’s one-way, you’d still have to get home

What purely cosmetic super-power would you most like? Shapeshifting. I don’t really get what you mean by purely cosmetic though

Do you like doing things communally? Depends on the thing

Name two food items you’ve never eaten combined before but would like to. Hot chocolate and chocolate liquer that I bought in Italy

Rank {Oceans, Forests, Tundra, Deserts, Mountains, Prairies, Lakes} with whatever comparator you like. My comparator is how much I’d want to be there, and the rank is oceans, lakes, mountains, forests, prairies, tundra, deserts

Is it better to intentionally trick yourself into believing something false for a practical purpose or to intentionally leave yourself ignorant about something with important consequences? The first I guess because there’s a practical purpose

Do you feel more fulfilled when you do something fun for its own sake or in the pursuit of something else? For its own sake

How easy is it for you to tell from looking at a piece of clothing how much you’d wear it if you owned it? Semi easy. I can tell by the fabric if it will be comfortable, and I can often tell if it’s something that would look good on me

What is one piece of trivial knowledge you would most enjoy being shared cultural knowledge? Idk??

Have you ever seen something that wasn’t there, even as an optical illusion? Yes

When you tell someone something about yourself, what do you want or expect them to do about it? React and be interested in it

If you could load books onto a reading device with actual pages, would that be better or worse than a tablet? Better, unless I want to read in the shower

Abolish human-caused death, or disease-caused death? Human-caused because I think more deaths are human-caused than disease-caused, and because you don’t have time to get your affairs in order

Come up with an arbitrary system for dividing people into groups. No copying existing media! Everyone who shares a name gets to meet up

Is it better for things in general to err on the side of too simple, or too complex? Too simple

If you could send your current personality back in time to your past self, would you do it? (factual knowledge would not go with) No, because the factual knowledge is what would be useful. My current personality isn’t my best in my opinion

What would music look like if it were visible to you as music? Idk maybe like the notes? It’s hard to conceptualize that

Why is there something rather than nothing? Idk because the universe said so

[bluewatsons]

Antonio Ventriglio et al., Relevance of culture‐bound syndromes in the 21st century, 70 Psychiatry & Clinical Neurosciences 3 (2015)

Abstract

Culture‐bound syndromes were first described over 60 years ago. The underlying premise was that certain psychiatric syndromes are confined to specific cultures. There is no doubt that cultures influence how symptoms are perceived, explained and from where help is sought. Cultures determine what idioms of distress are employed to express distress. Rapid globalization and industrialization have made the world a smaller place and cultures are being more influenced by other cultures. This has led to social and economic changes in parts of the world where such syndromes were seen more frequently. In this review we illustrate these changes using the example of dhat syndrome (semen‐loss anxiety). The number of syndromes in the DSM‐5 has been reduced, acknowledging that these syndromes may be changing their presentations. Clinicians need to be aware of social and economic changes that may affect presentation of various psychiatric syndromes.

Recent changes in the DSM‐5(1) may have abandoned the term ‘culture‐bound syndromes’ but in many parts of the world its use continues. Over 60 years ago, these syndromes appeared as exotic, alien, indigenous conditions seen in cultures that were also seen as less psychologically developed. Over the years, many of these syndromes have been reported from multiple cultures using different idioms of distress.

There is no doubt that cultures influence how people experience emotional distress, how they express it and in what terms and, more importantly, from where they seek help. Historically, colonizers saw those who were being ruled as exotic natives who were perhaps not very psychologically sophisticated and therefore ignorant and objects of observation. These psychiatrists and many anthropologist observers ignored existing indigenous health‐care systems, idioms of distress and the therapeutic interventions used by these populations. In many health‐care systems, the approach is much more social rather than biological and even when the body is affected, social factors are seen as playing a major role.

Background

Yap(2) was the first to describe culture‐bound psychogenic psychoses – a term subsequently abbreviated to ‘culture‐bound syndromes.’3 These were seen as ‘rare, exotic unpredictable and chaotic behaviors at their core among uncivilized people.’ There is no doubt that this was a reflection of the existing diagnostic systems where these systems were often difficult to classify. Bhugra and Jacob4 suggest that these behaviors were diagnosed with somewhat limited understanding of the cultural context. On the one hand, this is really surprising, as psychiatry is a medical specialty strongly influenced by cultural and social factors; but on the other hand, psychiatry may reflect somewhat rigid, patrician and paternalistic views.

In this commentary, we review the historical and current status of culture‐bound syndromes using dhat (a syndrome of semen‐loss anxiety seen very commonly in the Indian sub‐continent) as an illustrative example.

Nosological timeline

Yap first defined culture‐bound psychogenic psychoses in 1962.2 He modified the term to culture‐bound syndromes 7 years later3 and subsequently several such syndromes have been described and studied. In 1992, the ICD‐105 used the term ‘culture‐specific disorders’ and 15 years later the DSM‐51 abandoned the term to replace it with cultural concepts of distress (see the study by Ayonrinde and Bhugra for further discussion).6

What does ‘culture‐bound’ really mean? We believe that the concept of boundedness and whether certain illnesses are really bound to certain cultures is problematic. In particular, old traditional boundaries across cultures are becoming more porous and, with rapid globalization, cultural factors are becoming perhaps more diffuse and more accessible. The rapid increase in the use of social media and inter‐connectedness through increased and rapid access to media, including the Internet, has added another complicating and complex dimension.

Culture‐bound Syndromes in the Diagnostic Manuals (DSM and ICD)

As mentioned earlier, the rise of culture‐bound syndromes may be a reflection of the rise of Western diagnostic and classificatory systems and also the long‐standing impact of colonialism. Recent shifts in the DSM‐51 may indicate a change away from these factors. The two major psychiatric classificatory systems have used these syndromes in slightly different ways. Interestingly, the ICD‐10,5 which is a more culturally sensitive system, acknowledges that these syndromes are not easy to fit into classificatory categories.

ICD‐10 (1992)

The ICD‐105 recognizes a number of culturally uncommon symptom patterns and presentations referred to as ‘culture‐specific disorders.’ While acknowledging that these syndromes have diverse characteristics, they also have two common features:

They are not easily accommodated in established and international diagnostic categories.

Their initial description is in a particular population or cultural area and their subsequent association is with this community or culture.

The ICD‐10 has thus made cautious and tentative associations between cultural syndromes and recognized psychiatric categories, but the problem again is that these are culturally specific. We argue that these are reported from other cultures too and are not exclusive.

DSM‐IV‐TR (2000)

In the DSM‐IV‐TR,7 culture‐bound syndromes were seen as recurrent, locality‐specific patterns of aberrant behavior and troubling experience that may or may not be linked to a particular DSM‐IV diagnostic category.

The following characteristics were seen as crucial for culture‐bound syndromes:

Indigenously considered illnesses or afflictions – therefore a recognition within the society as a deviation from normal or healthy presentation.

Local names – the ascription of a specific local name to the experience of mental distress. This is often in the indigenous or key language of communication and may be components of folk diagnostic categories.

Symptoms, course and social response often influenced by local cultural factors – for instance the folk healing systems for the symptoms based on the explanatory model of the experiences.

Limited to specific societies or cultural areas – this may be a geographical region, areas with shared ethnic history or identity. For instance some cultural practices and artifacts of the Yoruba culture of western Nigeria may also be found in Brazil.

Localized – therefore experiences that are not globally recognized or span different regions.

The DSM‐51 discarded the concept of culture‐bound syndromes with a preference for the term ‘cultural concepts of distress.’ This has been defined as ‘ways cultural groups experience, understand, and communicate suffering, behavioral problems, or troubling thoughts and emotions.’ Consequently three cultural concepts have been identified: ‘syndromes’ (clusters of symptoms and attributions occurring among individuals in specific cultures); ‘idioms of distress’ (shared ways of communicating, expressing or sharing distress); and ‘explanations’ (labels, attributions suggesting causation of symptoms or distress).

Interestingly, the DSM‐5 emphasizes that all mental distress is culturally framed and acknowledges that different populations carry varying and culturally determined ways of communicating distress along with explanations of causality, coping methods and help‐seeking behaviors.

Changes in the Diagnostic Manuals (DSM and ICD)

For a time, there was an expansion in the number of culture‐bound syndromes from 25 syndromes in the DSM‐IV‐TR, but it has come down to nine in the DSM‐5. Not surprisingly, various concerns have been raised about the diagnostic validity of culture‐bound syndromes.8, 9

Culture‐bound syndromes are culturally influenced and, we would argue, also influenced by existing health‐care systems. Semen‐loss anxiety has been reported from many parts of the world as loss of semen due to nocturnal emissions or masturbation, and the condition affects individual notions of masculinity.

Dhat, or Semen‐Loss Anxiety Syndrome, in the Indian Sub‐Continent

Etymology

Dhat, or semen‐loss anxiety syndrome, includes symptoms of semen‐loss, which lead to complaints of weakness and anxiety. The word dhat is derived from the Sanskrit word dhatu, which means metal in Sanskrit and is also used as a colloquial term for semen. Early descriptions in 1960 by Wig and colleagues from north India observed that dhat syndrome involved many vague somatic complaints of weakness, fatigue, anxiety, loss of appetite, guilt and sexual dysfunction, which were seen as a direct result of semen loss following masturbation, nocturnal emissions or micturition.10, 11

Such symptoms have been noted in ancient Indian Ayurvedic texts dating to about 5000 BC. In these texts, semen production was described as ‘…food converts to blood which converts to flesh which converts to marrow and ultimately to semen.’ Each of these steps is supposed to take 40 days,12 thus making semen incredibly precious. These symptoms are widely recognized across the Indian subcontinent and folk and traditional treatments are easily available and widely sought, even though very little evidence exists for their success. We hypothesize that these treatments may work as placebo as the practitioners may be able to understand the cultural context.

As mentioned above, there is no doubt that, for men, semen‐loss and the resulting anxiety are incredibly important. Attitudes to masculinity, male sex roles, procreation and fertility all play a role in generating such anxiety. Similar values and anxieties were seen in industrial countries, such as Britain and the USA, in the 19th century. Dietary supplements, such as corn flakes and crackers, were advertised and sold as treatment for semen‐loss anxiety.3, 8, 9 In the Indian sub‐continent, faith healers and traditional healers continue to offer various types of food supplements, herbs and treatment strategies. It will be important to explore whether such anxiety has disappeared from industrial nations and the subsequent role globalization is likely to play in eliminating such anxieties or whether, on the other hand, it may further contribute to it. Urbanization is also likely to play a role as increased access to education spreads and higher levels of education and changes in understanding masculinity may well lead to a further reduction of the condition.

The future of culture‐bound syndromes or culture‐specific manifestations of distress as a range of disorders is uncertain, even though the DSM‐5 has taken the right steps. Recent reports of hikkikomori from Japan (where teenagers become withdrawn socially) raise a wider question as to whether this is a genuine response to changing pressures related to social media or something entirely different. There have been case reports from other parts of the world too.13, 14

The evolution of other culturally specific diagnostic systems, such as the Chinese Classification of Mental Disorders,15 may indicate a shift in some cultures from a universal classification of mental disorders to a more culture‐specific classification. We believe that psychiatry as a profession needs an urgent debate on universalist versus relativist classificatory systems.

Conclusions

With cultures in transition in many parts of the world as a result of inter‐connectedness and globalization, it is critical that clinicians are aware of how local cultures are changing. We believe that it is extremely likely that culture‐bound syndromes will no longer be culturally bound but culturally influenced. As a result of globalization, resulting and associated industrialization and urbanization may well lead to changes related to a move towards societies becoming more modern and less traditional, which in itself may change the perceptions and idioms of distress. Consequently, it is likely that not only will the expressions and idioms of distress change but so will the pathways to help‐seeking. We hope that, as a result of globalization, better understanding across cultures will lead to more balanced and nuanced approaches to diagnostic categories.

References

American Psychiatric Association. Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, 5th edn. American Psychiatric Association, Washington DC, 2013.

Yap PM. Words and things in comparative psychiatry with special reference to exotic psychosis. Acta Psychiat. Scand. 1962; 38: 157–182.

Yap PM. The culture bound syndromes. In: Cahil W, Lin TY (eds). Mental Health Research in Asia and The Pacific. East-West Centre Press, Honolulu, 1969; 33–53.

Bhugra D, Jacob KS. Culture bound syndromes. In: Bhugra D, Monro A (eds). Troublesome Disguises. Blackwell, Oxford, 1997; 296–334.

World Health Organization. ICD-10: International Classification of Diseases: Classifications of Mental and Behavioural Disorders, 10th edn. World Health Organization, Geneva, 1992.

Ayonrinde O, Bhugra D. Culture bound syndromes. In: Bhugra D, Malhi G (eds). Troublesome Disguises, 2nd edn. Wiley-Blackwell, Oxford, 2015; 231–251.

American Psychiatric Association. Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, 4th edn, text rev. American Psychiatric Association, Washington, DC, 2000.

Bhugra D, Sumathipala A, Siribaddana S. Culture-bound syndromes: A re-evaluation. In: Bhugra D, Bhui K (eds). Textbook of Cultural Psychiatry. Cambridge University Press, Cambridge, 2007; 141–156.

Sumathipala A, Siribaddana S, Bhugra D. Culture-bound syndromes: The story of dhat syndrome. Br. J. Psychiatry 2004; 184: 200–209.

Wig NN. Problems of mental health in India. J. Clin. Soc. Psychiatry 1960; 17: 48–53.

Malhotra HK, Wig NN. A culture bound sex neurosis of the Orient. Arch. Sex. Behav. 1975; 4: 519–528.

Bhugra D, Buchanan A. Impotence in ancient Indian texts. Sex. Marital Ther. 1989; 4: 87–92.

Teo AR, Fetters MD, Stufflebam K et al. Identification of the hikikomori syndrome of social withdrawal: Psychosocial features and treatment preferences in four countries. Int. J. Soc. Psychiatry 2015; 61: 64–72.

Kato TA, Shinfuku N, Sartorius N, Kanba S. Are Japan’s hikikomori and depression in young people spreading abroad? Lancet 2011; 378: 1070.

Chen YF. Chinese classification of mental disorders (CCMD-3): Towards integration in international classification. Psychopathology 2002; 35: 171–175.

[l-a-r-r-yspellslove]

5000 question survey - part 2

101. What does happiness/joy feel like physically? Cheeks hurting and heart pumping and feeling sort of free. 102. List five people you love starting with the one you love the absolute most. I have two nephews and two nieces and they rank 1-4. Then #5 would probably be my little. 103. How many movies have you gone to see this month?

One. Today, I went and saw Onward. 104. If you could have 3 wishes...but none of them could be for yourself, what would you wish for?

Forever happiness and freedom for Harry and Louis. 105. In what ways do you relax and de-stress when you are really tense?

Reading. Deep breaths. 106. How much money would it take to get you to drive to school naked in the springtime and get out of the car?

A million dollars. 107. Have you ever killed an animal?

I think I ran over a squirrel once. 108. Have you ever lost someone close to you?

My grandpa. 109. What do you think of cloning?

It’s fucking weird. 110. Do you read or watch TV more often?

Depends on the day. 111. With all this talk of terrorism going around are you willing to sacrifice rights and freedoms for increased safety?

Uh, depends on the rights/freedoms, I suppose. 112. What is the punishment you would come up with for Osama Bin Laden if you caught him alive?

I don’t like to think about these things. 113. Have you ever named an individual part of your body?

Nope. 114. Have you ever been on the radio or on TV?

I was on the news as a kid and I was on the radio with my sorority once. 115. Have you ever won a lottery, or sweepstakes?

Uh, no. 116. Have you ever won a contest or competition?

Ummm, I think the spelling bee as a kid. 117. Do you like to watch The Joy of Painting show with Bob Ross (check out this link if you don't know who he is. Also please note me if you notice the link is broken) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bob_Ross_(painter)?

Not often. 118. Do you know what your grandparents and your great grand parents did for a living?

Uhh, yes for two but no for the others. 119. Is there anything really interesting in your family history?

The guy that the movie Braveheart was based on? I’m related to him. 120. Is there anyone you trust completely?

My little. 121. Have you ever lost someone without having the chance to say goodbye?

Yes 122. How do you feel about women in politics?

Women can do anything. 123. Would you rather have an indoor Jacuzzi or an outdoor pool?

indoor Jacuzzi 124. What things are you interested in that you study or read about on your own?

Lots of things. It varies from time to time. 125. Would you consider yourself to be intelligent?

Yes 126. Would you consider yourself to be wise?

Somewhat 127. Have you ever given or received a lap dance?

No 128. Have you ever spoken to a homeless person?

Yes 129. Would you ever creep into the subway tunnels to go exploring?

Not alone. 130. If you could add 70 years to your life but only by making some random person die 70 years sooner would you?

I don’t think so 131. Can you finish any of the following lyrics? A: Nothing to kill or die for... B: Late comings with the late comin' stretcher... C: I could make a film and make you my star... uhh no

132. Were you ever with someone while they died?

No 133. Would you rather be a world political leader or a rock star?

a rock star. 134. Have you ever given someone a love letter that you wrote?

no 135. Have you ever sent someone a surprise though the mail?

i don’t think so 136. Are you looking forward to any concerts right now?

YES. Niall’s, Louis’s, Harry’s 137. Of all animated movies, which is the best one you've ever seen?

I really really really loved Onward, but it’s right up there with Frozen, I guess. 138. What are the best bands or songs to listen to while driving?

Anything upbeat. One Direction. Obviously. 139. What do you think is the most amazing thing that anyone has ever accomplished?

I mean, whoever put peanut butter inside chocolate the first time. 140. What could a member of the opposite sex do to impress you?

I dunno. Cook me something delicious. Make me something.  141. About how many emails do you get a day?

a lot. How many of those emails are junk mail? most How many of them are forwards? none, forwards are a thing of the past. 142. What's your favorite thing to do online besides write in your diary and hang out at this site?

I don’t spend much time on livejournal where this is from... I would say most of my time online is watching/streaming shows/movies. 143. Do you believe Kurt Cobain (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kurt_Cobain) killed himself or was it a conspiracy?

idk 144. Have you ever though about hitchhiking across the country?

sure 145. Who would you bring with you on this kind of a road trip?

whoever wanted to go, i guess. But hitchhiking is dangerous, so no. 146. Of the following, which word best describes you: accurate, bold, charming, dependable 147. If you are single, at about what age do you think you will be ready to settle down and get married? If you are married, how old were you at the time?

I’d be cool with settling down anytime. 148. Do you often wonder, when you say goodbye to people, if it is the last time you will ever see them?

Sometimes. 149. What movie are you most looking forward to seeing when it comes out?

The new Wonder Woman, the next Guardians of the Galaxy. The next Spider-Man. 150. What is your quest?

I wish I had a quest. 151. What is louder and more annoying: 200 adults talking or one four-year-old screaming?

200 adults talking.

152. Do you believe the stories about planes, boats and people mysteriously disappearing into the Bermuda triangle?

yes. 153. Who are you the most jealous of?

Louis/Harry 154. What is the happiest way you can start your day?

sleeping in. It’s always so much better to wake up fully rested. 155. Do you ever have moments where you feel like everything is all right in the world?

Sometimes. 156. Who thinks that you are offensive?

I dunno, probably some church people I used to speak to. 157. If you had to teach a class in something, what would you be able to teach people?

uhhhh, maybe crochet 158. Have you ever had a spiritual experience (an experience that cannot be explained by science)?

I think concerts can give you this surreal experience of connectedness to a lot of people at once. 159. Do you believe that this experience was truly mystical or do you think there is some scientific explanation for it, only you don't know what it is?

I dunno. 160. Do you get offended easily?

No 161. Would you still love and stay with your signifigant other if he or she had to have a breast or testicle removed?

yeah. 162. Do you believe in fate or free will?

a little bit of both 163. Do you believe that only boring people get bored?

no 164. Can life change or are we all stuck in vain?

change 165. What changes are you afraid of?

I dunno. 166. Are you a day person or nocturnal?

day 167. What one CD could you listen to for an entire week (no mixed CD’s, it must be an album)?

Fine Line - Harry Styles 168. Which is worse, working in retail, food service, or an office?

food service 169. What's the coolest job you ever had?

I’ve never had any cool jobs. 170. What is one central idea that your thoughts seem to come back to?

Why does this suck 171. Have you ever wanted to be an actor/tress?

When I was a kid 172. If you had the power to control one person and make this person do anything you wanted for a whole day, who would you pick and what would they do?

I’m not comfortable answering this question. 173. What star sign are you and what is your sign like?

virgo. 174. Did the Blair Witch Project scare you?

I don’t think I saw it. 175. Are you in constant fear of death?

no 176. Does fear of death keep you from building a life?

no 177. Do you like all your movies to be in wide-screen?

i don’t really care. wow this survey is OLD 178. Are you a fan of any comic books?

i like some but not super into any of them. 179. At what age did you attend your first funeral?

uhhh, kindergarten 180. What do you smell like (lotion, cologne, sweat)?

at the moment, stress relief lotion from bath and body works 181. What are your greatest sources for wisdom?

winnie the pooh. marvel. harry potter. 182. When you were little, where did your parents tell you babies come from?

i don’t remember 183. What is your favorite band?

one direction. 184. What's the best cheesy 80's song?

love is a battlefield 185. What's the best kind of movie to see on a date?

dude, not a good question for me. 186. Do you like to sit in the front, middle or back of the Movie Theater?

back 187. Have you ever been inside an abandoned building?

yes 188. Under what circumstances would you agree to work for free?

pretty much none. 189. Candles or strobe lights?

candles 190. Do you think the Lord of the Rings movies are true to the books or did Hollywood change the story too much?

they were fine. 191. When you see a stranger on the street does your first reaction lean towards thinking of this person as a potential friend or as a potential threat?

threat. social anxiety is a bitch. 192. Is it natural for human beings to fear and distrust each other, or is it cultural?

cultural 193. What do you really want to buy?

I dunno. GoF illustrated edition i need to get when I have spare cash, but I really need to save money for vacation and concerts. 194. You have to choose. Would you be happier marrying someone rich for their money or living in the streets and subway tunnels with someone you love?

with someone i love 195. If someone wanted to understand you what book could they read that would help?

harry potter 196. Do you think it’s odd that Americans have freedom of religion and yet call themselves 'one nation under god'?

yes. 197. In what sense are you a minority?

woman. 198. Are you anti social?

yes. it’s painful. 199. Do you photograph well?

ha no. 200. Do you think that human beings would survivor through a nuclear winter?

there’s some sure.

[ecotone99]

[FN] A Gauligy (5000 Word Mark)

This is my first real story, and I wanted to have some feedback on it. Tell me what you think!

This is only the first 5000 words, I'm trying to shoot for at least 20 thousand words by the end of this year.

Prologue

According to some people who have experienced the feeling, being sentenced to almost certain death has one upside. You can let yourself go. No need to worry about silly things like what one is going to wear, or how much money one has, or even whether one will get to say goodbye to friends and family. This last thought stuck with Ande as he was gingerly corralled into his spot on the sick wagon. Mainly because he had no one to say goodbye to. The only person he talked to for more than 5 minutes a day was also being loaded onto the sick wagon, right in front of him.

Now he was sitting down, the slightly sweet smell of Brushworm’s Disease all around him. His eyes skipped around the room, looking for anyone he might have worked with, but to no avail. The only one here he knew was Coal, his ore brother, as they called them back in the mines. Ande let his eyes stray around for a few more seconds before focusing onto his brother. “Are you feeling ok?” Ande asked as he pivoted his head down to Coal, who was a couple feet shorter than him.

Coal had always been short for his age, though most 11-year-olds were relatively short. Ande figured he was just a little slower at growing. “As well as I could be.” Coal answered, a little half-grimace, half-smile escaping his dark complexion. But his eyes were not on Ande. Instead, they were doing what Ande had been doing a moment ago: scanning the walls of the little wagon, lingering more than once on the illustrated version of what the final moments of Brushworm’s Disease looked like. A man, painted in a blueish-grey, convulsing on the ground. I hope I don’t end up like that, Cole thought.

After the final person was shoved into the wagon, the entrance was closed and barred shut from the outside. The only thing proving that it was not the middle of the night were a few shimmers of the afternoon sun shining through holes in the wooden planks which made up the wagon. The one soldier who would guard this shipment of worthless slaves could be heard climbing the ladder to his spot on the roof, where he would inevitably fall asleep, as nobody ever raided a wagon with one of the four disease signs, let alone a Brushworm’s Disease wagon, as it was extremely contagious.

The soldier had only come on the condition that he would be triple paid and would be given one of the supposed disease-resistant tunics to wear under his armor. As he pulled himself up over the final ladder rung, he took one final glance back at the village that he might never see again if this journey of 3 weeks went wrong. Once he was settled into his small sentry position, which was simply a wooden box with iron lining, he reluctantly tapped the roof to let the driver know he was ready. The quartet of horses began to strain against their harnesses, and then they were off.

Inside the wagon, the sick people were already drifting off to sleep themselves. They all knew how long this journey would be, and how cramped they would be at the end. Sleeping was a great way to get your mind off the inevitable: death. Some of the smaller children were chatting, trying to distract themselves from the smell.

The ride when this way for a couple of hours. Only the occasional bump over an extra-large stone assured people that they were not in some kind of time loop. Which is why when something thunked into the side of the back wall and tore out, pulling some of the oak wall off and revealing a glimpse of the outside world, people were a bit startled. Instantly, the entire room was abuzz. The wagon came to an abrupt stop which knocked the people who had stood up over, and boots could be heard clomping around on the roof, before suddenly stopping. Another hole appeared in the roof, but no one was paying attention to that. They were all looking at the hole by the backdoor which was widening as Something had reached in and begun to rip through the sturdy wood.

But then the wagon was off, at a much higher speed, and whatever had tried to come through the hole was thrown off. A muffled groan was heard as someone fell off the roof, and a glimpse of a small figure lying on the ground could be seen on the side of the road as the wagon pulled away at top speed, pulling around a bend. Everyone began to talk. “Did you see that thing's hands? They looked massive!” “Was that our guard by the side of the road?” “What caused those holes?” Ande and Coal did not partake in the conversation, instead of huddling in a corner together and drifting off to sleep.

Chapter 1:

The wagon continued at top speed for about half an hour more, before coming to a stop on the side of the hard-packed dirt road. Boots could be heard on the ladder rungs, and within a few moments, the guard was opening the door just enough to see inside. “Is everyone still here?” He asked first. “As far as we know. We can’t see a thing in this box.” An older man said in a deep and monotonous voice. “What were those things?” A little girl asked, her head just peeking out behind her mother’s legs. “Never you mind. We’ll be at our first stopping point soon.” And with that, the guard closed the door again and climbed back up the ladder.

The wagon started back to its normal pace, and everyone sat back down. No one had ever heard of an attack on a sick wagon. What was the point? They carried no valuables, and you had more to lose than you had to gain. All kinds of theories circulated the group, none of which made much sense. After a couple more minutes, a light pitter-patter began on the roof of the wagon, which turned into a full-fledged storm, blocking out anything anyone wanted to say in anything but a yell. That’ll shut down the conversations for a while, thought Ande. He always preferred the quiet moments when everyone was asleep. Better for thinking.

Normally, Ande would be thinking about how he and Coal could escape, but this time his mind drifted off to his life, which seemed to be coming to an abrupt end. He thought of his work in the mines when he had first met Coal. He had even been the one to give Coal a name when he had pulled him out of a small collapse which had left him covered in dark soot. He thought of the brief period when he had been transported from his simple life with his parents to the mines, and the castle in which he had stayed in. When it had been happening, it had almost seemed magical. Now, Ande understood what had happened: The entire governmental system of Thetch had been completely changed when Sebastian Vernille had become king. Just thinking of that man’s name brought shivers to Ande’s spine. If he could even be called a man. He’s barely out of his teenage years. Ande coughed into his arm, which brought him back to the present. He glanced around the room, looking for the whites of eyes to see if anyone else was awake. None. “Hello?” He said. No response. Carefully, he stood up, nudging Coal with his foot. “Now’s our chance.” He whispered, sweeping the room with his eyes once again to make sure that no one was watching. With any luck, no one would even notice they were gone. After all, they had avoided talking to anyone, or even moving around much. Coal was awake in an instant, and followed his ore brother’s example, gingerly getting up from his sitting position on the floor. Now, the game was afoot.

Ande began to step into the small places on the floor that weren’t already occupied by a leg or an arm, with Coal right behind him. One step at a time. Carefully step around that creaky floorboard. Ande had a habit of wiggling his fingers when he was concentrating, and they were going full speed now. Ande felt the wagon begin to take a turn. They were nearing their destination, so the brothers sped up as much as they could afford to.

In a few more moments, they were at the back of the wagon, fiddling with the handle. It was locked from the outside, which Ande had figured. Now for the last, and most dangerous part of the escape. When Ande had first stepped onto the wagon, he had noticed that the only locking mechanism for the door was a simple metal bar. It had nothing to lock it in place, it would simply be laid across the door, meaning that, in theory, one of the occasional rocks that the wagon would bump over could bounce it up enough to open the door, but the window would be minuscule, to say the least. So, there they stood, Ande’s hand on the handle, waiting for something to jar the bar just enough for them to pull it open.

Another turn by the wagon. They were almost to the sick town. There was nothing they could do but wait and hope that the wagon driver would give them a chance. A groan could be heard as someone began to wake up. Come on… one bump is all I need. Suddenly, a jarring smash nearly knocked over Ande and Coal but gave Ande just enough time to shove the door out enough to keep the bar from reconnecting in its spot. Fresh air rushed into the wagon, and everyone was up in an instant, moving towards the door. Unfortunately, the door had been dragged into the side of the wagon with considerable force, causing a great big crash, which alerted the driver and the soldier.

The wagon instantly slowed, and the soldier was up quickly, his training kicking in. But Ande was ready. He grabbed Coal’s hand and jumped to the side of the small road, aiming for the bushes which stood in front of the forest. They missed by a small margin but rolled into the tree cover, which they quickly realized had been covering up a steep descent down a rocky hill.

Chapter 2:

Glimpses of the ocean could be seen every time Ande’s head came up from the tumbling, but then he was back into the ground. He did his best to cover his head with his hands, hoping that he could avoid too damaging of a descent on this slope. Coal seemed to have caught on quickly, mimicking his friend. Before too long, they slowed and finally stopped, a mess of twigs, thorns, and egg yolk. (They had rolled through a bird’s nest which had unfortunately decided that the ground was a perfectly fine place to keep one’s offspring.)

Groaning, Ande reluctantly got up from his spot on the ground. At the very least, he was alive, and his head seemed to be intact, aside from a light wooziness that was fading as the nausea went away. He scanned around, looking for the best options to escape. Then he stopped himself. Why would the soldiers come after him? He was probably going to die anyway. So, he sat back down and waited for Coal to finish dusting himself off. They were on a beach, and the sun was beginning to set. It was a very beautiful sight, and they would’ve continued to enjoy it, had hands not come over their mouths with a cloth, which smelled nice and Oooooo… Off to sleep, they went.

When they awoke, they were back in the wagon as if nothing had ever happened. Coal was the first to wake up, as he had managed to avoid inhaling too many fumes from the rags which had been used to incapacitate them. He glanced around and shook Ande awake. It only took a moment or two, and they were both wide awake and wondering whether they had just imagined the last couple minutes. It had been the last couple minutes, as they could see that the light that made it through the cracks in the wooden walls was the same shade and brightness.

No one else in the wagon seemed to think that anything had happened, or if they did, they were very relaxed and did not care that two people who were already doomed to certain death were recovered by the soldier. The last minutes of the ride were uneventful, and the only thing that Ande could think was, Why?

Chapter 3:

The wagon skidded to a halt, and a muted conversation happening on the other side of the strong oak walls of the wagon could be heard. In another minute, the door was being hauled open, and two new soldiers appeared to give people incentive to leave the wagon. They were, of course, wearing the protective garb. The original soldier began to call names as if it mattered whether they had left anyone. This scene was strange, considering it was not as if any of the people had committed any crimes, and yet they were being given the royal treatment given to an enemy of the king.

“Coal, miner.” Read the soldier. For any of the slaves, a name was uncommon. Coal had received his when the group of close-knit miners had found him completely covered from head-to-toe in coal after a small collapse in one of the mines. Coal stepped off the wagon, walking to the back of the line of diseased people. “Andesite, miner.” Ande stepped down onto the hard-packed dirt road and walked over to Coal, but not before giving the soldier a little snark. “You can call me Ande.”

For most people, that would be seen as a simple joke, but Sebastian’s soldiers were trained to put up with next to nothing in the humor department, and that was shown when one of the soldiers, a tall and skinny one who was constantly scanning the tree line as if something was about to jump out and eat him, gave Ande a little punch with the butt of his sword. Ande did his best to act indifferent, but he could not completely ignore the blunt pain.

The line was finished as the last stragglers which had been at the back of the wagon joined them, and they were immediately marched through the tree line, which had looked solid, but instantly gave way to a massive clearing. They only had a few moments before they were pushed into a small waiting room made out of wooden logs. But the glimpse they had gotten had been magnificent. There were 4 large buildings that appeared to be crafted out of stone. They were huge, and towered over the plain, creating massive shadows which sizes were aided by the sun that was hovering over the mountains, threatening to dip under and plunge the world into cold and darkness. The castles each had a flag fluttering above them, each with a different insignia. They were all instantly recognizable, as they were the four deadly diseases that everyone in the Vernille Empire feared. The one that they were closest to was the same sign which was on their wagon. In a few more moments, they were back in a line and back to walking.

This was all done with military precision, so quick that none of the sick people had much time to glance around at their surroundings, effectively keeping them from noticing the sentry towers at the edge of the woods, or the wall that was being constructed around the perimeter of the field, partially hidden by the forest. Everyone, that is, except Ande, who’s eyes were flashing so fast that they became dry. He noticed that their group was being merged with another, he also noticed the dozen crossbows being pointed at them by the soldiers who were concealed on the side of the castle.

He noticed it all, but only for a moment, as the group was pushed into the castle, unsure of what lay ahead. Little did they know, however, that they were in over their heads. In WAY over.

Chapter 4:

As the troop was marched into the castle, it took a moment for their eyes to adjust to the light. There was light coming from EVERYWHERE. From the walls, where candles were spaced every couple of feet. From the ceiling, where massive chandeliers hung, swaying slightly with the breeze. This place was the opposite of what they had been expecting to see: red and gold dominated the palate, massive and lush carpets, all sorts of paintings and tapestries. The ceiling, what could be seen of it, was two massive arches made out of some kind of unknown wood but was beautiful all the same. There were no windows except the skylights which dominated the middle of the roof, where the wooden arches met. Now, while these things were seen by the sharper eyes of the group, most of the eyes strayed to the middle of the room, where a massive table stood. Now, it was a nice table. Made out of mahogany with gold lining and a velvet tablecloth, it was quite a specimen. However, it was not the thing at which most of the group had been staring at. No, instead they were staring at the food on the table. Now, if you happen to be hungry, I would not recommend reading this next paragraph, and if you aren’t hungry, be warned that you may be hungry in the near future.

Right in the middle of the table were several massive turkeys, stuffed to perfection with apples and herbs, and unlikely combination, but a delicious one at that. Around the turkeys were all kinds of pies, meat, and fruit alike. Then there were the cheeses, each one delicious and different, and after those were the jello and the salad. To top it all off, there were cups full of some kind of red liquid that tasted like a mix of cherry and strawberry, and it was one of the best drinks that any of the group had ever had.

Imagine the time that you were the fullest of food you have ever been. Now imagine the best food you have ever had the pleasure of devouring.

Now combine these two experiences. Some of you may have already experienced this, and you would especially understand the feeling these sick and hungry travelers felt in an hour. Many of them were asleep on the great chairs which encircled the table, and the ones who were not were reclined, gazing up at the night sky which could be seen very well through the well-scrubbed skylights. In a few more minutes, there were only four people left awake. One of them had insomnia and rarely slept more than an hour a day. One of them was barely awake (Coal), and another was Ande, who was quite awake. The final person becomes important in this story, but we’re looking at the journeys of Ande and Coal, so you will meet this mysterious person when they do. For now, the only thing that these people were worried about was the fact that they were extremely parched.

Ande was reaching out for one of the chalices, which he had not tried yet when something far overhead could be heard cracking. The whole group, save Coal, who was too far gone to be woken by something any quieter than thunder, instantly looked upwards, just in time to see a body tumbling towards them, along with hundreds of shards of glass tumbling down with him. It was almost a beautiful spectacle, aside from the fact that the man was screaming the whole way and it was pretty clear he wouldn’t survive, but lucky for him, he managed to land on top of one of the turkeys, which was mostly filled with stuffing, so he was fine, but the turkey was mangled in the process. In a moment chairs were pushed away from the table, soldiers were in the room, and another figure could be seen jumping through the massive hole which had appeared on the skylight.

Chapter 5:

This figure seemed to be a little more control of his fall, as he landed on his feet, effectively snapping the table in half. Somehow, the entire group was still asleep, and the original group of people who were awake were twice as awake as they had been, rushing away from the table.

The figure was off the table in an instant, diving for Coal, who had almost been asleep but was quickly awoken when the surface he was resting his head on suddenly dropped away. Ande also dove for Coal and dragged him away a second before the creature reached him. Guards began firing bolts from their crossbows, filling the air with dangerous pieces of metal that flew in all directions. A couple of the bolts connected, but that didn’t seem to stop the creature. He kept his forward momentum going even after Coal was out of reach, flying towards Ande as he tried to back away. Ande instantly reacted by curling himself around Coal on the floor, trying to protect him.

This was smarter than he thought, as the creature flew over and past him and connected with a guard who was just finishing reloading his crossbow. The creature was up in an instant and spun around, moving back towards the two boys. Ande tried to wrap himself more, trying to cushion Coal. Ande closed his eyes shut as the creature dove across the remaining distance separating him and the boys. He braced himself for the moment when the creature would connect with him and probably crush him, as the creature looked about seven feet tall. But that moment never came, instead, it was replaced with a strange silence.

Ande counted to ten and then glanced around quickly, before relaxing. The creature was on the ground in front of him and Coal, a crossbow bolt in his arm. He was still, fast asleep or dead, Ande did not know. However, he was immobilized, and Ande quickly shook Coal and they both scrambled away from the creature. Soldiers were swarming the thing, tying it and rechecking knots. Now that Ande wasn’t in survival mode, he studied the creature. It had grey-ish green skin, sharp teeth, and a bald head. It was relatively humanoid, besides the fact that it had an extra set of arms attached to his back. It quivered a little bit but was otherwise completely still. It was only another minute before the soldiers were dragging the thing away, completely bound. A couple of soldiers remained, and these escorted each of the still awake Sick Ones to their rooms.

Ande and Coal were very wary, but even weariness cannot quench the thirst that is curiosity. They were in a shared room, each with their own bed on opposite walls. They had a big window in between them with curtains drawn. They checked the window and found to their chagrin a weave of metal bars on the outside of the window, keep any hopeful escapees from succeeding in their plans.

The opposite side of the window had a door, which was locked, and to the left of that was a small bathroom that housed hygiene necessities. The floor was oak, and the walls were a unique gold and velvet pattern, to match the color scheme of the rest of the castle.

After a few minutes of exploring their room, and trying multiple escape routes, the two gave up for the night and got into their beds, drifting to sleep after a few words of encouragement to each other.

Chapter 6:

A small, sharp glint of sunlight was focused on Ande’s face, and gradually he began to awake, before finally opening his eyes and then immediately closing them, for no one likes the sun in their eyes the second they wake up. Birds chirped in the distance and pots and pans clacking against each-other could be heard downstairs. Steps could also be heard above them, echoing around their room. Groans and yawns accompanied all this, and soon Ande looked down to see Coal waking up, adding to the morning’s symphony by abruptly jerking upwards and falling out of his bed, landing onto the floor in a heap of pain, some to his pride and some to his back, which had been the primary cushion.

“Good morning…” He murmured, stretching on the floor. “And to you.” Replied Ande, standing up and moving over to the window, where he pulled aside the blinds. The iron bars were still there, but now there was something to see past them.

A small courtyard was directly underneath the boys’ window, closed in by a stone wall that had the usual emblem for Brushworm’s Disease every 15 feet or so. The courtyard had a little fountain and some nice grass with a pretty hue of green, but this courtyard was only seen at a passing glance. On the other side of the wall lay a massive field, which they had not noticed as well before, as the castle itself was in the way. It stretched on for miles, housing not only these four castles, but also additional buildings in the distance that seemed to be made in a similar style, minus the disease flags.

In the distance, a mountain range could be seen, giving the sun which was rising directly behind it a sliced look.

The boys peered outside for a few more moments before closing the curtains every so slightly and stepping away from the window. Coal walked over to the door and tried the handle, and to his surprise, it turned easily on its well-oiled holdings and released the door forwards. Coal was, in fact, so sure that the door wouldn’t be locked, so as the door swung open, Coal went with it, falling or the second time in as many minutes onto the oaken floor of the fortress. He got up quickly when he noticed that the hallway had quite a few occupants who had been leaving their rooms when he had blundered his way out of his room. He blushed a little bit, but quickly re-entered his room and shut the door. Some clipped laughter could be heard in the hallway, and conversations instantly started. “So, what now?” Coal’s query, while it was genuine, was also fueled by his desire to block out the laughing which was happening on the other side of the big, metal and oak door.

Ande caught on quickly and tried his best to hide his grin. “Maybe out the door?” He quickly closed his mouth before something sarcastic like, “And this time, let’s keep our balance,” came out. Coal nodded slowly. “Let’s wait here for a minute.” He added. And so, they did.

Once Ande had counted to one hundred, the boys left their room. The hall was mostly empty now aside from a few stragglers, and they were all moving towards the left of the boys, where the hallway ended in a set of elegant stairs. Ande looked at Coal and shrugged, turning and walking down the hallway towards the stairs.

The stairs wasted no time in taking a sharp right which continued underneath them, creating a spiral of reds, golds, and browns. The boys followed it, and soon reached another floor, which looked identical to the one their room was on. The only thing different was that the neat little signs next to each door now went up from four hundred instead of five hundred as they had on the boys’ level of the castle. And so the boys continued downwards for a couple more levels until they reached the grand hall, emerging from their downwards spiral onto a landing, another set of stairs in front of them, and down those stairs the massive banquet hall and the beautiful table, now completely cleared from last’s nights feastings and replenished with eggs, toast, and a scores more of delectable breakfast foods.

The table was about half occupied, meaning there were some late sleepers still snoring away upstairs. And by the looks of things, they could continue, for there was plenty of food still on the table, and there were waiters and waitresses continually refilling every cup, bowl and plate. That same liquid from yesterday seemed to be in everyone’s cups, and Ande was still excited to see exactly what it tasted like. The boys turned and grinned at each other. “Who knew traveling to your death would be this bad?” Coal exclaimed, and they both ran down the stairs as fast as they dared, rushing towards two untaken seats at the great table.

Ande opted for eggs, bacon and hash browns, which were all cooked to perfection. These three things he put between two slices of toast, and he suddenly had the best breakfast sandwich one could ask for. Coal opted for more of a sweet tooth approach to his breakfast, choosing pancakes coated in butter and drizzled in a cherry sauce, and a fruit salad on the side. Both Ande and Coal enjoyed their breakfasts immensely, especially considering they had both been slaves almost their whole lives and had never had a breakfast half as good as this one.

Soon they were feeling full once again, but even more full than yesterday as their stomachs welcomed in the food and expanded. The boys reclined in their chairs and glanced around at the rest of the table, which was now completely full, and the food supplies were running low as the cooks slowed down and let the last of their 'customers' finish off their food.

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[everettxjenkins]

The Measles Outbreak In Two Disney Parks In California

The Measles Outbreak In Two Disney Parks In California. Fifteen years after measles was declared eliminated in the United States, the brand-new outbreak traced to two Disney parks in California illustrates how despatch a return can occur. As of Tuesday, more than 50 cases had been reported in the outbreak, which began in the third week of December. Orange County and San Diego County are the hardest hit, with 10 reported cases each, according to the California Department of Public Health. The outbreak also extends to two cases in Utah, two in Washington, one in Colorado and one in Mexico vigrxplus.top. Measles symptoms can come about up to three weeks after approve exposure, so the days for unfamiliar infections anon linked to the original outbreak at the Disney parks has passed. However, inferior cases continue to be reported in those who caught the disease from people infected during visits to the parks. Disney officials also confirmed on Wednesday that five estate employees who play costumed characters in the parks have been infected, the Associated Press reported discover more here. And mercilessly two dozen unvaccinated students in Orange County have been ordered to linger home to try and contain the spread of measles. Experts define the California outbreak simply. "This outbreak is occurring because a critical number of society are choosing not to vaccinate their children," said Dr Paul Offit, director of the Vaccine Education Center and an attending medical doctor at The Children's Hospital of Philadelphia's Division of Infectious Diseases. "Parents are not terrified of the disease" because they've never seen it more. "And, to a lesser extent, they have these unfounded concerns about vaccines. But the big vindication is they don't fear the disease". The United States declared measles eliminated from the sticks in 2000. This meant the disease was no longer native to the United States. The wilderness was able to eliminate measles because of effective vaccination programs and a strong public healthfulness system for detecting and responding to measles cases and outbreaks, according to the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. But in the intervening years, a modest but growing number of parents have chosen not to have their children vaccinated, due at bottom to what infectious-disease experts call mistaken fears about childhood vaccines. Researchers have found that defunct outbreaks of vaccine-preventable diseases are more likely in places where there are clusters of parents who refuse to have their children vaccinated, said Saad Omer, an secondary professor of global health, epidemiology and pediatrics at Emory University School of Public Health and Emory Vaccine Center, in Atlanta. These supposed "vaccine refusals" direct to exemptions to school immunization requirements that parents can obtain on the basis of their critical or religious beliefs. "California is one of the states with some of the highest rates in the country in terms of exemptions, and also there's a well-built clustering of refusals there. Perceptions regarding vaccine safety have a slightly higher contribution to vaccine refusal, but they are not the only apology parents don't vaccinate". Other reasons include the reliance that their children will not catch the disease, the disease is not very severe and the vaccine is not effective. In California, vaccine exemptions have increased from 1,5 percent in 2007 to 3,1 percent in 2013, according to an scrutiny by the Los Angeles Times. Recent legislation tightened the rules for derogatory belief exemptions by requiring parents to have doctors grapheme the exemption forms. But Omer said it is too soon to know the effects of the unknown law. A big contributing factor to the parents' continuing concerns about vaccine safety was a 1998 also phony paper published and later retracted in the medical journal The Lancet. The muse about falsely suggested a link between the measles-mumps-rubella (MMR) vaccine and autism. The advantage author of that paper, Andrew Wakefield, has since lost his medical license for having falsified his data. Several dozen studies and a account from the Institute of Medicine have since found no link between autism and any vaccines, including the MMR vaccine. Researchers have found that those who deprive vaccines tend to share similarities. "In general, they're upper-middle to more elevated class, well-educated - often graduate school-educated - and in jobs in which they burden some level of control. They believe that they can google the word vaccine and know as much, if not more, as anyone who's giving them advice". Omer added that late data has shown that measles cases tend to disproportionately embody people who are not vaccinated. "The higher the vaccination rates, the lower the frequency and size of outbreaks". The most prevalent side effects of the MMR vaccine are a fever and occasionally a mild rash. Some children may circumstance seizures from the fever, but experts say these seizures have no long-term uninterested effects. The majority of recent outbreaks have been traced back to unvaccinated US residents. Last year, 644 measles cases were reported to the CDC, the highest host of cases recorded since the ailment was declared eliminated. Almost half of those cases occurred in Ohio after unvaccinated US residents traveled to the Philippines and returned ill. Similarly, more than half the outbreaks in the commencement half of 2013 originated with US residents who traveled abroad and came back with measles. Measles is one of the most contagious of human diseases. The airborne virus can dawdle in an area up to two hours after an infected person leaves, and approximately 90 percent of relations without immunity will become sick if exposed to the virus. Serious complications from measles can allow for pneumonia and encephalitis, which can lead to long-term deafness or brain damage. An estimated one in 5000 cases will consequence in death, according to Offit. "If a child died of measles in southern California, I consider people would start vaccinating. I think it will take more suffering and more hospitalizations and more deaths to not catch sight of these outbreaks proextenderusa.men. We're compelled by fear, and we don't fear this disease enough".

[freesearchengines-blog]

How Many People Are Infected With Measles

How Many People Are Infected With Measles. The million of mortals infected with measles linked to the outbreak at Disney amusement parks in Southern California now stands at 70, fettle officials reported Thursday. The overwhelming majority of cases - 62 - have been reported in California, and most of those grass roots hadn't gotten the measles-mumps-rubella, or MMR, vaccine, the Associated Press reported home. Public fitness officials are urging people who haven't been vaccinated against measles to leave alone the Disney parks where the outbreak originated. California state epidemiologist Gil Chavez also urged the unvaccinated to steer clear of places with lots of international travelers, such as airports. "Patient zero" - or the authority of the initial infections - was probably either a resident of a country where measles is widespread or a Californian who traveled everywhere and brought the virus back to the United States, the AP reported sex story in sleep in hindi. The outbreak is occurring 15 years after measles was declared eliminated in the United States. But the renewed outbreak illustrates how quick a resurgence of the disease can occur. And health experts delineate the California outbreak simply homepage. "This outbreak is occurring because a critical number of settle are choosing not to vaccinate their children," said Dr Paul Offit, director of the Vaccine Education Center and an attending doctor at The Children's Hospital of Philadelphia's Division of Infectious Diseases. And "Parents are not shocked of the disease" because they've never seen it. "And, to a lesser extent, they have these unfounded concerns about vaccines. But the big aim is they don't fear the disease". On Friday, the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) recommended that all parents vaccinate their children against measles. "Vaccines are one of the most distinguished ways parents can shelter their children from very real diseases that exist in our world," Dr Errol Alden, the academy's head director and CEO, said in a news release. So "The measles vaccine is justifiable and effective". Dr Yvonne Maldonado, vice chair of the academy's Committee on Infectious Diseases, said: "Delaying vaccination leaves children unguarded to measles when it is most dangerous to their development, and it also affects the unscathed community. We see measles spreading most rapidly in communities with higher rates of delayed or missed vaccinations. Declining vaccination for your offspring puts other children at risk, including infants who are too boyish to be vaccinated, and children who are especially vulnerable due to certain medications they're taking". The United States declared measles eliminated from the homeland in 2000. This meant the sickness was no longer native to the United States. The country was able to eliminate measles because of effective vaccination programs and a unfailing public health system for detecting and responding to measles cases and outbreaks, according to the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. But in the intervening years, a selfish but growing integer of parents have chosen not to have their children vaccinated, due largely to what infectious-disease experts call barking up the wrong tree fears about childhood vaccines. Researchers have found that past outbreaks of vaccine-preventable diseases are more likely in places where there are clusters of parents who garbage to have their children vaccinated, said Saad Omer, an associate professor of extensive health, epidemiology and pediatrics at Emory University School of Public Health and Emory Vaccine Center, in Atlanta. These ostensible "vaccine refusals" refer to exemptions to school immunization requirements that parents can apply on the basis of their personal or religious beliefs. So "California is one of the states with some of the highest rates in the land in terms of exemptions, and also there's a substantial clustering of refusals there. Perceptions re vaccine safety have a slightly higher contribution to vaccine refusal, but they are not the only reason parents don't vaccinate". Other reasons cover the belief that their children will not catch the disease, the complaint is not very severe and the vaccine is not effective. A big contributing factor to the parents' continuing concerns about vaccine security was a 1998 fraudulent paper published and later retracted in the medical journal The Lancet. The lessons falsely suggested a link between the measles-mumps-rubella vaccine and autism. The potential author of that paper, Andrew Wakefield, has since lost his medical license for having falsified his data. Several dozen studies and a narrative from the Institute of Medicine have since found no link between autism and any vaccines, including the MMR vaccine. Researchers utter that those who refuse vaccines tend to share similarities. "In general, they're upper-middle to higher class, well-educated - often graduate school-educated - and in jobs in which they drill some level of control. They believe that they can google the word vaccine and know as much, if not more, as anyone who's giving them advice". Omer added that modern data has shown that measles cases lean to disproportionately involve people who are not vaccinated. So "The higher the vaccination rates, the lower the frequency and scope of outbreaks". The American Academy of Pediatrics, the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and the American Academy of Family Physicians all second that children receive the MMR vaccine at adulthood 12 to 15 months, and again at 4 to 6 years. The most common camp effects of the MMR vaccine are a fever and occasionally a mild rash. Some children may experience seizures from the fever, but experts bring up these seizures have no long-term negative effects. The majority of current outbreaks have been traced back to unvaccinated US residents. Last year, 644 measles cases were reported to the CDC, the highest bevy of cases recorded since the disease was declared eliminated. Measles is one of the most contagious of benignant diseases. The airborne virus can linger in an area up to two hours after an infected human leaves, and approximately 90 percent of people without immunity will become sick if exposed to the virus. Serious complications from measles can involve pneumonia and encephalitis, which can lead to long-term deafness or brain damage. An estimated one in 5000 cases will conclusion in death, according to Offit. "If a child died of measles in Southern California, I suppose people would start vaccinating. I contemplate it will take more suffering and more hospitalizations and more deaths to not see these outbreaks website. We're compelled by fear, and we don't fright this disease enough".

[japanesestudies172]

Earthquakes and Disasters: How Ready is Japan?

(Photo credit: Daily Express)

Japan is one of the countries that is most struck by earthquakes. In fact, there is a quake every 5 minutes and consequently, tsunamis. Fortunately for them, they are also one of the best prepared nations in the world in terms of disaster preventions. I want to investigate how they implement these measures and analyze them for effectiveness. How effective are these measures? Are most of the masses aware of the necessary steps to follow in case of an emergency? As I travelled around Japan, I looked for answers.

(Photo credit: ICCROM)

(Photo credit: World Monuments Fund)

Japan has many heritage buildings. After the Great East Japan Earthquake of 2011, the number of damaged heritage buildings were a shocking 554, including 116 Important Cultural Property buildings and 438 Registered Cultural Property buildings (Nishikawa 36). Some of these buildings were completely teared down by the earthquakes and tsunamis. As these buildings are considered important in generating tourism revenues for the country, Japan has decided to enforce earthquake countermeasures on them. The government hired some experts to evaluate the earthquake resistance of these buildings, and to reinforce them accordingly. The more people that are expected to enter a certain building, the higher the resistance must be. However, it is not only these cultural buildings that are supposed to be earthquake resistant. Japan has worked hard to ensure that most buildings and structures are built with earthquake resistant materials, especially new ones. As a result, over 75% of buildings in Japan are earthquake resistant.

(Photo credit: Surviving in Japan)

From my observations during my time in Japan, the Japanese people are very aware and prepared on the possibility of an earthquake striking. When I visited the Bousai Center, which every prefecture has at least one of, I was surprised that it was free for everyone, even for foreigners such as myself. I signed up for the earthquake-only experience, but had I done the others (including fire drills, smoke drills, etc.) it would have still been completely free. I think that this is a great step by the Japanese government because giving the public free education on matters relating to safety is of utmost importance.

(Photo credit: Web Japan)

At the time I went there, there were also a lot of little kids who were about to leave, they were presumably grade school kids who went there on a field trip or maybe even a required educational trip. This is important because I think these earthquake safety drills should be drilled into us, starting from pre-school all the way to high school, and even while we are already working. I felt like the drills really help in being able to survive an earthquake, especially with the panic. A lot of people panicked when they hear that there is an earthquake ongoing, especially when they did not have any sort of disaster training. 

(Photo credit: Twitter)

This was especially true when a random earthquake struck us while we were in the dorms, and a lot of the foreign exchange students were extremely panicked and called their parents immediately. The quake was only 4-5 magnitude in strength, so it could be felt but it is not so extreme that it would tear apart our dormitory. However, if a strong quake did hit us, a panicked mindset would be a deterrent to surviving. That is why having experienced these drills can help us keep our focus during crucial moments and ultimately lead us to survival.

(Photo credit: Disaster Preparedness Tokyo)

While in Japan, I also read some of the Bousai comics and books that I was able to procure. Most of them just emphasized what one had to during an earthquake in many different situations. Also, one of the things I found interesting was fastening the furniture, TV, and cabinets to the wall securely. I did not ever think that one had to do that, because in my own house back in the Philippines, none of our furniture are fastened.

The handbook that the government gives to every household is also a very informative 300-page book. Since it is meant for Japanese people, the Japanese they use is not as easy as it is in the manga. There was no furigana, so it was a little difficult for me to read. I should note that this handbook is only given to residents in the Tokyo area, I am not sure if they give similar ones to everyone across the country.

(Photo credit: Spoon & Tamago)

The book was very thorough in illustrating literally every possible scenario that one could be doing during an earthquake. This includes being in the airport, on the streets, in the classroom, in a movie theater, in the office, on a road intersection, on a bridge, in a tunnel, in the bathroom (showering and using the toilet are different scenarios), climbing down stairs, and more.

The book also tells us of the NG (Not Good) things to do during an earthquake. Most of them are obvious like don’t light match so that you don’t cause a fire, don’t touch electricity, and don’t walk barefooted. Some of the less obvious ones were to not carry out a rescue operation by yourself and to hold back from calling on the phone because the lines are cut. I think that some of the obvious ones should not be mentioned by the book, such as walking barefooted to avoid injuries, but other than that this information is useful, to both kids and adults alike.

(Photo credit:  絵本ナビ)

On the other hand, the manga that I’ve read was more targeted towards younger people, so they used relatively easy words which also made it easier for me (and presumably Japanese kids) to understand. The manga had most of the information that was written in the Bousai handbook.

Since it was targeted towards kids, the author made it sort of interactive with the reader. One of the adults in the book would constantly ask the crew of kids questions about disaster prevention, and it does feel as though that the reader is one of those kids. There would also be personalities for each kid, for example, there would be the smart one, the not-so-smart one, the one who would ask a lot of question, and more. It makes it even more relatable to the reader, and I would recommend it to children who want to learn more about disasters in general. This is because the manga does not only contain information on earthquakes, it also covers a variety of disasters that may inevitably strike Japan one day.

As for ICU’s earthquake procedures, they did not exactly brief us about the safety precautions to take during an earthquake. However, they gave people from the University of California (UC) a pamphlet that briefly outlines that to do during an earthquake. This was held as a separate orientation for them, so the rest of the people who were not from UC were not given this orientation. I think this is one part that ICU should work on. They should give everyone the same information especially when it concerns the safety of their students.

(Photo credit: Time Out)

While browsing through stores such as Tokyo Hands, I found that they don’t really have a big area for bousai goods. It is always just one section set aside for disaster prevention goods. Some of the goods they sell in there are quite questionable. I was not exactly sure on what a cap should be used for during times of disaster. The cap was not really anything special and even had no brand name. It was just wrapped in a regular plastic wrap and under the item name “work cap”.

I also was not very sure on the use of a toilet bowl cover in the context of disaster prevention. Apparently, that toilet bowl cover is the number one best seller last year. However, after reading the labels for the product, I realized that if water supply was cut, then there would be no flush for toilets. I guess Japanese people really find this item to be a necessity. I did not expect that this would be the number one selling item of all the disaster prevention goods. I expected the bousai bag to sell more than the toilet bowl cover since that is presumably more useful.

The bousai bag that was sold in the stores included 18 different things that might be useful for survival during a disaster, all for the price of 5000 yen. I guess if one were lazy, then 5000 yen might be worth paying to save one’s life during a disaster.

What I found was the most interesting item sold in the store was the Izameshi Carry Box. It is basically food supply that would last a long time, ideal for times of disaster where electricity might be cut. For 11 packs of food, one would have to pay 8000 yen. This would come out to around 700 yen per meal, which isn’t that bad. However, according to my Japanese friend, these kinds of food don’t really taste that great. They are essentially just for last resort because they generally taste very bad because of all the preservatives added to make sure they last during a disaster.

(Photo credit: CNN)

Japan has put a lot of work into the preparations for earthquake prevention. They have a lot of countermeasures in place in order to secure the safety of their people. The government knows exactly what the threat is and is trying their hardest to educate the people about the proper safety procedures. From the bousai centers to books about disaster prevention to their educational curriculum, Japan is a nation well-prepared for the disasters nature has in store for them. The worst has yet to come, but I think Japan will endure just fine. In a nation that takes disaster prevention very seriously, I have no doubt that they will be able to withstand just about any kind of earthquake. They are after all one of the most innovative leaders in disaster prevention in the world.

Bibliography:

Eisuke, Nishikawa. "Development in Earthquake Countermeasures for Heritage Buildings in Japan." Archeomatica, Vol 8, Iss 1 (2017), no. 1, 2017. EBSCOhost, rizal.lib.admu.edu.ph:2048/login?url=http://search.ebscohost.com/login.aspx?direct=true&db=edsdoj&AN=edsdoj.5589eac1b8bb497db904da98945cdcb9&scope=site.

Haraoka, T, et al. "Prevention of Injuries and Diseases in Non-Professional Disaster Volunteer Activities in the Great East Japan Earthquake Areas: A Preliminary Study." Public Health, vol. 127, no. 1, Jan. 2013, pp. 72-75. EBSCOhost, doi:10.1016/j.puhe.2012.09.005.

Moriyama, Karin and Makiko Kaga. "Mental Healthcare Efforts for the Public After the Great East Japan Earthquake: "Guide to Good Mental Health for Those Affected by Natural Disasters" Published by the Cabinet Office." Brain & Development, vol. 35, no. 3, Mar. 2013, pp. 201-208. EBSCOhost, doi:10.1016/j.braindev.2012.11.003.

Nakaya, Naoki, et al. "Effect of Tsunami Drill Experience on Evacuation Behavior After the Onset of the Great East Japan Earthquake." International Journal of Disaster Risk Reduction, vol. 28, June 2018, p. 206. EBSCOhost, rizal.lib.admu.edu.ph:2048/login?url=http://search.ebscohost.com/login.aspx?direct=true&db=edo&AN=129095664&scope=site.

Raby, Alison, et al. "Implications of the 2011 Great East Japan Tsunami on Sea Defence Design." International Journal of Disaster Risk Reduction, vol. 14, no. Part 4, 01 Dec. 2015, pp. 332-346. EBSCOhost, doi:10.1016/j.ijdrr.2015.08.009.

[eelgibbortech-blog]

We got 3.5x the paid conversions with this SaaS onboarding email copy

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The right users may be signing up for your free trials…

They may be activating.

They may be experiencing AHA moments and getting value out of what your SaaS offers. They may be the perfect candidate for a paying customer.

But here’s the problem: too many of them are not buying. They’re not converting from free to paid. They should convert. But they’re just… not.

Could be your free trial is too long. Could be your pricing is wrong. Could be your whole business model is wrong. Or it could be something much simpler – it could be this:

You’re still sending onboarding emails when your trial user is ready for sales emails

There comes a time when your prospect is actually ready to buy.

The nurturing stops. And the closing begins.

This is where it comes down to what you say and how you say it.

It comes down to copy.

As we work to grow Airstory, we see – time and again – that the biz gets stronger when our copy acts like our online salesperson… and results get crappy when our copy doesn’t realize it’s supposed to be selling. Now I know I’m talking about “selling,” which is a trigger word for a lot of people. (“Don’t sell! Teach, and they’ll convert.“) But the fact is that, eventually, you really do have to try to close your prospect. Yes, you’ve gotta have the right strategy, product-market fit, nurturing content, etc. But once that’s settled, it’s all about copy that closes.

Once it’s time to sell, your copy can triple your business… or cut it in half… or destroy it. Copy is that important.

Not long ago, we worked with Wistia on increasing paid conversions for their trial emails. If you know Wistia, you know:

Wistia’s product is great. (We’ve been hosting our videos with Wistia for the past 4 years and have happily paid them some $5000 for their service.)

Wistia’s brand is strong. If you’ve been to Wistiafest, you know they’re champions of video marketing, and people who make videos know that, too.

Wistia’s price didn’t show any signs of being problematic. They were doing some price testing while we worked, separately from our work.

The majority of Wistia’s trial users were good-fit users. That is, there was no cause for concern that the prospect was wrong.

But something wasn’t working. In spite of all of that. In spite of Wistia being Wistia.

It was a copy problem. Wistia’s email copy wasn’t acting like an online salesperson. It wasn’t closing. 

So we fixed that. Here’s how.

A side-by-side comparison of how we optimized Wistia’s SaaS email copy to bring in a 350% lift in paid conversions

I’ve spoken about this study at conferences like Mozcon, and I’m gonna keep mentioning it ‘cos it’s such a good study in closer copy. But I’ve never gone through all 8 emails like I’m about to do here. I’ve never shown the before-and-after for each of them. I’ve never gone much deeper than using these emails to teach folks how to “get specific” and stuff like that.

Today, I’m gonna share the long and the short of this SaaS onboarding email study with you. Consider this a crash course in writing copy for SaaS emails, where the goal is to increase paid conversions.

My hope: you’ll take what you read here and rewrite your emails to close.

First, here’s some background on this project.

(You can come back to this part after, if you just wanna skip ahead and see the copy changes.)

Wistia sends 3 tracks of emails to trial users. Each track is triggered by an action. You move off of and onto a track based on the actions you take. The first track is the essential onboarding sequence, triggered when a user starts a trial; the second is triggered after an AHA moment has been achieved; and the third is intended entirely to convert the trial user from free to paid.

We worked on the third set because that’s the one that’s supposed to close. And I can’t help myself – I wanted to work on it because I like coffee, and coffee is for closers. I get a rush off seeing what makes people buy. I love when the success metric is paid conversions, average order value, average revenue per user – all things revenue-y. So I didn’t want to work on the non-closer emails.

This email track contained eight (8) emails. The trial users who got as far as this email track were likely to be good-fit prospects.

The frequency of emails: 1 per day. When a user converted to paid, they were removed from the track.

We conducted an assessment of the emails before starting the hands-on rewrites. You can find some of that here

We rewrote all eight emails; the core of the changes here were copy changes. The offer didn’t change. We didn’t create any new incentives to convert. We didn’t change the positioning. We didn’t manufacture urgency with countdown timers or create scarcity with a limited number of X. Everything about our rewrites was in keeping with what the controls were already doing. The only “conversion tricks” we used were copy optimizations.

We tested our copy against the control using HubSpot, where you can A/B test nurturing / drip campaigns (which is amazing). Wistia’s internal CRO conducted and monitored the test, showing the data to us and reporting the results with confidence.

The success metric: paid conversions for the entire sequence.

To help with comparisons, let’s look at all the Wistia emails (Variation A / Control) and then the Copy Hackers rewrites (Variation B). You can click each to see full-size, with detail.

Control, by Wistia:

Variation B, by Copy Hackers: 

So that’s the lay of the land. Now here are the 7 primary ways we edited and optimized this track / sequence, with before-and-afters to illustrate.

Before we dive in, two points.

The first: Wistia’s emails are very well written and smart. We were starting with a strong control. We were also really lucky to be working with entrepreneurs that test risky stuff instead of playing it safe. Swinging for the fence = always the better way to run a copy test.

The second: All the emails labeled Treatment B were part of the sequence that brought in 350% more paid conversions. So when you’re reading through and going “meh, that’s too long” or “there’s no way this would work for us, ” remember: all together, these emails more than tripled paid conversions. So is it worth a test for you? Methinks so.

K, let’s optimize some emails…

1. They’re not emails – they’re sales letters

When I invited Andrew at Wistia to see my proposed copy to test, his first reaction was this:

“It’s longer than we’re used to.”

But he knew we were testing. And he trusted me. So he rolled with it.

Every single email we wrote used more copy than the control. In 7 of the 8 emails, our versions were at least 3x as long as the control. And that’s not because we’ve got major issues with self-editing.

It’s because we weren’t thinking of an email as an email. We were thinking of an email as a sales letter for a single feature.

More about this in the next point. But for now, when you’re reviewing your copy, ask yourself:

How is the way I’m thinking about emails limiting what this email can do?

How is my fear of losing subscribers limiting this email’s ability to close?

If I didn’t have a nagging voice in my head telling me to play it safe, how would I actually write this? 

And when you start writing longer emails, your worry should NOT be that your copy is “too long.” Your worry should be that your copy “doesn’t sell for shit.” Make it sell. Make it close. Use as many words as it takes to earn your cup of coffee.

2. It’s not a collection of random emails – it’s a funnel

A paid conversion happens once you’ve convincingly moved a prospect through the 5 primary stages of awareness, all the way to Most Aware.

Source: Search Engine Land

By the time a trial user started to receive the emails in the Wistia sequence we were optimizing, we had good reason to believe they had strong Product Awareness and were moving toward Most Aware. So the job of the emails was to nurture the prospect the rest of the way. It was to move the prospect from Product Aware to the far end of Most Aware, where closing happens. That was it.

But the control emails weren’t organized to push the prospect along the awareness spectrum.

Instead, they hovered in the Solution Aware > Product Aware space. This is what they were each about:

Email 1: Video analytics (Product Aware)

Email 2: Timeline actions (Product Aware)

Email 3: Wistia vs the competition (Solution or Product Aware)

Email 4: Turnstile case study (Solution or Product Aware)

Email 5: Video analytics case study (Solution or Product Aware)

Email 6: Turn off Wistia branding (Product Aware)

Email 7: Support is available (Product Aware)

Email 8: Player customization (Product Aware)

They needed to be organized to round out Product Awareness and move the prospect to Most Aware. Because we wanted to increase paid conversions. So we reordered them like so:

Email 1: Ego: the vanity play with data (Product Aware)

Email 2: Ease: tweaks (Product Aware)

Email 3: Direct tie to outcome: growth (Product Aware)

Email 4: Differentiator: CTAs (Product Aware)

Email 5: The Pitch (Most Aware)

Email 6: PAS (Most Aware)

Email 7: Incentive: upgrade to annual (Most Aware)

Email 8: New segment: courses

Note that, as we moved the prospect through Product Awareness, we focused not on the features but on the outcome / benefit for the prospect. It wasn’t until Email 4, where the prospect was Most Aware, that we framed our focus around features and incentives.

Emails 1 through 4 were for a Product Aware prospect.

Emails 5 through 7 were for a Most Aware prospect.

And email 8… well, that was our throw-in. We felt confident that emails 5 through 7 would convert, and we hypothesized that, if it didn’t convert a user, it may be that that user had specific needs not yet addressed in the emails. For the test, that unknown non-converting user was a course creator using Wistia. And that’s why email 8 feels more like an offshoot of the sequence than a part of it. By design. Here it is, for your reference:

Takeaway: Optimizing your email sequence may be as simple as reordering your existing emails along the stages of awareness spectrum, finishing always with closer emails for a Most Aware prospect.

3. Your copy shouldn’t be as slick as a used car salesman’s hair

In my experience, marketers are happiest with a message when it sounds polished.

But here’s why that’s a problem. What happens when you run your hands over something that’s polished? They slip right off. They don’t stick. Because there’s nothing to stick to.

Same is true for polished copy. If your copy sounds like it’s been reworked until anyone anywhere could say it, that’s a bad thing.

Lemme repeat for the enterprise marketers out there: polished copy is a bad thing.

We want copy that sticks. And that’s almost always going to sound raw. Because it will be pulled from voice-of-customer data and left largely unedited, like in our headline for this email:

The control email features a polished headline. The headline for Treatment B:

Plays off a familiar structure (i.e., the black-and-white-and-read-all-over joke) to nudge the reader to engage and actually read

Uses language swiped from customer reviews of Wistia and the cofounder’s own words (as said in a podcast he was once on)

Sets up a level of intrigue that can rarely be achieved with stock, too-polished phrasing

Both emails are about comparing Wistia to the competition in order to convert the trialist. But only one of the emails makes you care about – and engage in the act of – comparing the two. Only one of them makes Wistia sound like the better option. Only one of them tries to sell the upgrade to paid.

4. At this stage, do NOT ask questions your prospect may not answer the way you want them to

If you ask a yes/no question hoping for a “yes” answer… what happens if your prospect answers “no” instead? You need to phrase all your questions in such a way that the prospect has to answer in agreement with you. And if you can’t do that, delete the question.

Why? Because you do NOT want your prospect to shake their head at you. That ‘no’ interrupts the seduction. It makes them think you don’t actually understand them after all.

In this control email, the opening line of the body copy finishes with this question:

Ready to dive into some data?

Few marketers and video-pros using Wistia and receiving these emails would answer “Yup, I cannot WAIT to dive into some data!” Instead, they’d answer with a shrug, a soft no or a hard no (i.e., close the email, never to return again).

So our version of this email asks questions with more controlled answers.

The first question is this: People are watching your video. Fantastic, right?

Unless the prospect is using Wistia for private videos no one is intended to watch (in which case this email wouldn’t trigger), the answer to that question is very likely going to be “yes.” Even an eyerolling yes. Even an omg-I-hate-myself-on-camera yes.

The next question our copy asks isn’t a yes/no. It’s a question that requires the reader to think about the answer, and it allows us to help her arrive at the right answer.

The question is this: How can you put your new video data to work for you?

We follow that question with an entire paragraph of questions that agitate or dig deep on the topic, with the idea being that the marketer is unlikely to have thought of all the ways video analytics can help them optimize their video content. We’re showing – not telling – that Wistia is stellar because it arms you with optimization-aiding analytics. We’re nudging the prospect to see Wistia as a powerful data solution.

We finish the email by answering the questions we’ve asked.

5. At this stage, do NOT waste time on stories people don’t care about

Case studies are great. As long as you tell the story right.

And by “tell the story right,” I mean be a good storyteller:

Open with a hook

Lure the reader from one line to the next

Start in the middle of the action

Create compelling characters

Set the story around a central conflict

If you don’t have conflict, you don’t have a story.

If you don’t have a hook, who would read?

In these emails, you can see that the control was based around a case study for a business called Zeeblu. It’s a perfectly fine study. But because we didn’t find the story compelling, we dropped the study and put our hero (the prospect) at the center of the story:

Compare the two emails.

The control wants to tell a story.

Treatment B actually does tell a story. (Hell, it’s even got dialogue.) If our version had a working title, it would be “How you can use Wistia to get more leads.”

It opens with a hook

It lures the reader from one line to the next

There’s no preamble – it starts in the middle of the action

It features the most compelling character: you

It features a central conflict: how to get more leads without spending more money or creating more content

Wistia’s a brilliant solution, so little wonder they have a lot of case studies. A second case study-based email – this one for MailChimp – appears in the same sequence:

We decided to scrap the Mailchimp story entirely. That’s because we’d already talked about video analytics in this sequence. In its place, we wrote a short closer-focused last-chance ‘offer’ email, where we repositioned an existing offer to sound like a one-time promotion; we scheduled it toward the end of the sequence, when the non-converted trial user is likely to be Most Aware.

It can be hard to say no to using a case study – especially great ones from known names. But if it’s not a compelling story, you will bore your prospect. So don’t waste a sales email on a non-converting email.

Remember: Every email your subscribers open but don’t care about is an email that widens the gap between you and them.

6. Bring your message, value and product to life with specific copy – not vague messages

What does your brain see when you read this line:

Customize the color of your video player appearance.

And what does your brain see when you read this line:

The Wistia video player defaults to grey. Which is nice. But grey. Why stick with grey when you can go with hot pink… or dollar-bill green… or, well, Wistia Blue?

Each of those statements is conveying the same message. But your brain has an easier time grasping one over the other. Is the vague first one easier to grasp… or is the more specific one more likely to form an image or two in your brain?

Okay, let’s try another one.

K, tell me how your brain makes sense of this statement:

18% is a lot. 

Now how does your brain make sense of this:

Getting 18% more views is pretty major. Videos that used to get 100 views a day now get 118 views a day. In a month, that’s an extra 500+ views. 

One is a statement that leaves the reader to figure stuff out. (And maybe even argue that 18% is not a lot.) The other is so specific, it removes the burden of thinking, calculating, pausing, trying to make sense of the numbers. The prospect can just absorb the info. No work required.

The specific copy outperformed the vague copy.

That didn’t happen in just one email I wrote. That happened in all the emails I wrote.

Here’s another example:

As you can see in the two emails above, this control copy wasn’t as specific as it could be:

You can add annotations, create calls to action or collect emails through turnstile – all within the video player!

We unpacked the significance of each of the important points the control was glossing over. That turned into a bullet list filled with specifics about annotations, CTAs and turnstile.

This all goes back to Steve Krug’s old “Don’t Make Me Think” principle. Use specificity to bring concepts, product features, outcomes, benefits and more to life in the mind of your busy reader. When you tell yourself your reader is too busy to read a lot of copy, remember that specific copy is going to engage more than short, vague copy will.

Perhaps (or of course) Don Draper said it best:

“The greatest thing you have working for you is not the photo you take or the picture you paint. It’s the imagination of the consumer. They have no budget. They have no time limit. And if you can get in that space, your ad can run all day.”

7. Edit in the awesome

Your first draft will be crap.

It should be.

This is always true.

You should never expect the first draft of anything you write or someone else writes to be great.

The real magic happens once the first draft is knocked out. Without Wistia’s control emails to work with, we would’ve had to go through God knows how many iterations to get a strong first draft ready to optimize. Thankfully, Wistia’s got stellar marketers and copywriters on their team – so it was easy for us to ‘edit in the awesome.’

With these lessons, it should be easy for you to edit the awesome into your email sequences, as well.

And if you feel like this post is just scratching the surface of what you can do with your email copy (because it is), click here to be notified when our copywriting program 10x Emails reopens

FINAL NOTE: There is no such thing as optimized copy.

The very term “optimized copy” suggests a finality – but optimization is an ongoing thing. It’s never done. Wistia is still optimizing these emails.

That said, when you A/B test your copy, you have the benefit of data to tell you if your optimization efforts paid off in that one moment in time. Did your new copy work? Should you push harder on a new focus in your messaging? That’s what testing can tell you – not necessarily which message is best but where you should keep applying energy…

~jo

PS: When I present this study, I often hear that we didn’t just change the copy – we changed the design. People say I should talk about the design changes, too. That’s cool… but our philosophy is that copy leads design. So when copy changes, design changes. We can’t separate the two. But what I can say, as a copywriter and the lead on this project – as the person who typed the copy into the HubSpot email templates – was that copy changed, and what you’ve seen above are the copy changes.

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