#it was supposed to look way closer to the canon style like the edits

[kedicatt]

shh, he's having his dinner... don't bother him right now

[somuchnonsense]

“Fluff”tober Drabbles 10-12

Previous drabbles

10. Leaves                    (post-canon Wangxian)

Lan Wangji finds Wei Wuxian lying under a maple tree, its leaves a riot of brilliant reds, oranges and yellows and some lingering green. His eyes are closed, his hands tucked under his head, his body relaxed. He looks at peace, and as beautiful in Lan Wangji’s eyes as the tree above him. A dark red leaf drifts down and lands in Wei Wuxian’s hair, like an ornament next to the bright red of his hair ribbon, and Lan Wangji smiles at the sight.

For a minute or two, Lan Wangji stands there, appreciating the view, until Wei Wuxian opens his eyes. He blinks sleepily a few times, and then a slow, lazy grin spreads over his face. “Were you staring at me, Lan Zhan?”

The answer is obvious, and Lan Wangji doesn’t feel the need to defend himself. Why wouldn’t he stare at his husband relaxing in the dappled sunlight of a perfect autumn day?

Wei Wuxian laughs, accepting his non-answer. “Come sit with me, Lan Zhan. It’s beautiful here.”

“You’re beautiful,” Lan Wangji responds, because it’s true and because he loves the way the compliment momentarily flusters Wei Wuxian.

“Lan Zhan,” he whines, but then he recovers and smirks, tossing his hair. “I am, aren’t I?”

Lan Wangji ignores the question, going to sit next to Wei Wuxian, but while the scenery is indeed beautiful, they both can’t help looking at each other.

11. Moving                    (idol trainee AU Wangxian)

Lan Zhan is so perfect and Wei Ying is torn between being impressed and being jealous. He works hard—they all do or they won’t last long—but Lan Zhan has more talent in his pinky finger than a lot of the guys here, and a lot of experience too, making him much closer to the goal of being a polished idol than most of them. Wei Ying has talent too, but the mentors keep telling him that he lacks polish and discipline and that, essentially, if he doesn’t get his shit together, he won’t make it to the end—or if he does manage it on the power of his charm, he won’t be successful after.

The trouble is that Wei Ying has never in his life been good at discipline, at least not the kind Lan Zhan has, where you speak respectfully to your teachers and don’t interrupt practice to make jokes, even when everyone is stressed out and a joke will help diffuse the tension. He’s never been good at doing things the way he’s supposed to if he doesn’t think it’s the best way, if a different dance move would make it more interesting or a change in the lyrics would make them them flow better, or if goofing off will keep him sane during the long hours of practice.

When they get put in a group together for the next challenge, Wei Ying suspects it’ll be a disaster, but he also sees it as an opportunity. Lan Zhan is the top trainee, after all, and Wei Ying’s been up there too. They have a good song and good choreography. If they pull it off, it’ll get them a lot of attention, and with it a lot of votes. They just, you know, have to not kill each other in the process. Unfortunately, that’s asking a lot, because Lan Zhan is respectful to their teachers, but he has very little patience for Wei Ying, especially after hours and hours of draining practice.

“Why can’t you take anything seriously?” Lan Zhan roars when Wei Ying trips him, which was both funny at the time and, in retrospect, a really stupid idea when they can’t afford any injuries. “Do you even want to be an idol?” It’s some ungodly hour of the morning on their third night practicing until almost dawn and even Lan Zhan is too exhausted to manage himself in front of the cameras. If he’s lucky, they’ll edit this out or frame it in some way that doesn’t make him look too bad, but Wei Ying’s more likely to get the villain edit if he’s not careful.

The thing is, Wei Ying does want very badly to be an idol, and he also wants Lan Zhan to like him, or at least to respect him. He wants to work side by side with Lan Zhan and put out good songs, good performances. He wants Lan Zhan to understand what not enough people understand: that he’s very serious about this, even if he shows it differently. He’s exhausted too, and it’s too hard to explain himself and too revealing even for the middle of the night to show how much he wants this.

“Hey, let’s all calm down…” says Nie Huaisang, fluttering nervously between them.

“I want to be an idol,” Wei Ying says flatly, looking Lan Zhan right in the eye. He can’t say anything more—how this is his last chance, how hard it was to get here without support, how all the criticism doesn’t roll off his back as easily as he pretends it does. He only looks at Lan Zhan, who for a long moment looks back at him, really looks at him for the first time and finally sees him. It’s a scary thing, being seen, and scarier still realizing how much he’s wanted Lan Zhan to see him.

None of their groupmates say a word, a heavy silence persisting until Lan Zhan finally looks away and Wei Ying can breathe again. “Let’s continue,” Lan Zhan says gruffly.

As they move into formation, he catches Wei Ying’s eye one more time and there’s understanding there, at last. He gives a curt nod, and just that acknowledgment surprises a broad smile out of Wei Ying. “Let’s do this!” he yells—and they do.

12. White                    (post-canon Wangxian)

Wei Wuxian doesn’t wear Lan white; he’s not interested in looking like he’s in mourning. He doesn’t wear light blue like Lan Wangji either, or the slightly darker blue his brother favors. He’s married into the Gusu Lan Sect, but he’s still Wei Wuxian, just as he was for all those years in the Yunmeng Jiang Sect. Why should he change his style—or himself—to suit anyone else?

He does wear a white underrobe sometimes, and not just so he has an excuse to steal Lan Wangji’s clothing. Something of a compromise, maybe—he’s not a Lan, but he is part of their sect, and he can show some respect for his husband and their sect leader—or maybe just an amusing reminder of how horrified Lan Qiren was the first time he saw that Wei Wuxian was wearing Lan Wangji’s clothes under his usual black.

He also appreciates how Lan Wangji looks in his whites and delicate blues, the pale clothing only making him look more like a perfectly carved porcelain doll, with his smooth skin and sculpted features. And he appreciates most of all how Lan Wangji looks when he takes those clothes off of him, white fabric pooling around him as he sheds that doll-like illusion of chaste perfection and gives in to pleasure.

[renlimotroll]

Death by a Thousand Cuts

Pairing: Mintosu × Siruko (side), one-sided Limone-sensei x Siruko (main)

Summary: It's not the butterflies that tell Sensei that he's in love. It was the death by a thousand cuts.

Tags: angst, heavy angst!!!, endgame MinSiru wedding, long fic, unrequited love

Warning: BL, Cursing, Imagination, but I like to keep my characterization 80% canon.

Ren's notes:

Before you read this, I want to say that this is Sensei’s POV, so the MinSiru moments will come across as sad and painful. I love Siruko-san, Mintosu-san and Limone-Sensei equally, and this is only just a story, okay? Please come into the story with an open mind and finish it with no attachments. Also, ready your heart.

I woke up at 3am and started writing this because all my best thoughts come at 3am. I was supposed to write cutesy, romantic Christmas stories, but when inspiration hits, it hits. This story is 100% MinSiru because no matter how pseudo-canon LimoSiru is, it's not what people want (wow, bitter Ren is bitter).

This story might be controversial, so I spent a week debating whether to publish it or not, but after all the hard work and me trying to be poetic, it would be a waste to keep it in my folders.

I'd like to thank Taylor Swift for possessing me with her poetic ghost. I listened to "The Moment I Knew", a song about her bf not coming to her birthday party, and was filled with so much angst because it hit home too much.

Please enjoy and don't blame me for your holiday blues!!

This story didn't have a happy ending.

Because the moment Limone-sensei realized he had fallen in love, he knew he was screwed big time. And it won't end well for him. 

But that was okay, because all he wanted was for this person's happiness. This person deserved it more than anyone else in the world, and Limone-sensei will do everything in his power to make sure he gets it.

He being Siruko-san.

He didn’t like them, at first. Limone was a possessive, jealous friend, and when he learned Hana-chan met new gaming friends, his first instinct was to shoot them. But how could anyone not love Siruko-san? He had a beautiful soul, a kindness rare to the human race. Siruko-san was the kind of person who could bring a group of people of different personalities together and make them all get along well. It was really easy to fall for someone like him, and no matter how hard Sensei tried not to, it just happened. 

After that, it was death by a thousand cuts.

The first cut came out when they were shooting a video. He always looked forward to the four of them shooting, because that meant he could see Siruko-san. But something about the Bintroll leader was off, had been off for days actually. Sensei knew because Sensei watches all his live streams when he can, and he was observant. It made Sensei’s heart weak, but because they weren't that close and they didn't have the same level of friendship Siruko had with Mintosu-san, Sensei couldn't just LINE him and say, "Hey, is something wrong with you?" But something happens with the Minecraft trap he was making for Hana-chan, and his first thought was, I can use this as an excuse. So he calls Siruko-san and all is saved, and after that they start to communicate more, outside the games they play for Hana-chan's channel.

Sensei's plan to get closer to Siruko-san fails, because the more time he spends chatting with him, the more he gets to know Siruko-san, the more he falls in love. They text almost everyday; they VC on nights they both couldn't sleep, on days something good happens and they both wanted someone to share it with. And then Sensei realizes something that'll break his heart forever.

One day, after Hana-chan wrapped up the first Atsumori video of them, and Sensei and Siruko moved to private messaging on Discord and continue to chat and talk like they always do after each shoot (sometimes about editing and most times about nothing), Sensei thought it was time.

"Siruko-san."

"Hm?" The purple head answered absent-mindedly. Because they're on a video call, like they've done most times now actually, Sensei could see his beautiful purple eyes fixed on something in his monitor. He's reading the comments on the latest Bintroll video, and Sensei always finds it endearing that he's always liking all the comments. Sensei does read his comments too, but he thinks it's too troublesome to like all of it. It's just not his style.

Sensei decided it's now-or-never. "You like Mintosu-san, don't you?"

Siruko stopped scrolling, eyes shifting to the webcam. Sensei kept a straight face, fakes being detached and indifferent to the reply, but it's something he already knew. He's seen it in the way Siruko-san almost always talks about Mintosu-san when they voice call, in the way that he's always so soft and patient for Mintosu-san. Sensei saw Siruko scrambling for an answer in a panic and took that as a confirmation, even as Siruko-san started to deny it.

"W-what's gotten into you Sense--? O-of course not!! I-what made you say that? Mouuu, is this a prank?? Stop joking with me Sense-- hidoi yo!"

Sensei rolled his eyes for effect, but his chest is heavy with something he can't explain. "You're a fucking idiot. Just spit it out, okay? I know it. Don’t make a fool of me."

"I really dont!" Siruko vehemently opposed it. A moment later, he gave up and sighed in defeat, because Sensei always saw right through him. "I-is it obvious?"

Very, Sensei thought, but instead he went with, "I don't think Mintosu-san knows. That guy is as dense as the air itself."

They fell into silence, and Limone-sensei was very sure right now that Siruko was thinking of the green robot. His heart told him, “No, don't say it, don't do it Limone!!”, but since when has he listened to his heart? So he said to Siruko-san, "You should confess."

"E-EHHHH?!?!"

"Tell him what you feel, Siruko-san."

"I-uhhh… Minben-san is not…. And I c-can't… uuummmmm…."

"Oh for fucks sake! Stop being a fucking coward, okay? If Mintosu-san accepts your feelings, then good. If he rejects you, then you'll learn how to move on. But I won't let you just keep this to yourself." Limone face-palmed himself internally, thinking hard about how he’s such a fucking liar and a hypocrite. The wide, scared puppy eyes Siruko-san is showing melted his heart. It's his weakness. But Sensei never gave in to any of his weaknesses. "I've watched all your videos and we've been friends for a long enough time for me to be sure that you love him, Siruko-san."

"But… but what if Minben-san..." Siruko whispered with this lost, desperate voice, and Sensei gritted his teeth to keep himself from falling apart. He had to do the right thing, even if it meant ruining himself.

"You'll never know if you never try. That's why you need to do something about this, instead of carrying it in your heart all the time. At the very least, it'll give you answers." Siruko looked so unsure, and Sensei knew he's thinking that Minben-san will never like him, that he's thinking bad thoughts about himself, and Sensei won't let Siruko belittle himself again. "Stop overthinking this! It's all in your mind. I said it, didn't I? You'll never know if you never try. Don't make me call Mintosu-san myself and tell him your feelings."

"A-ah!! Okay okay!! I'll… think about it?"

"Fine. I guess that's good enough."

Siruko smiled that sweet, precious smile of his, and usually it warmed Sensei's heart, but today it brought a thousand cuts. "Thank you Sensei."

"Whatever. Now hurry up and finish liking those comments so we can go to sleep."

"But you can sleep! I told you you didn't have to stay up for me!"

"And since when have I ever listened to you?"

"All the time." Siruko muttered, but Sensei heard it, so he faked being insulted with a "HA?!?!" and Siruko laughed (and Sensei loved that laugh), "Nothing, nothing!! Of course you'll do what you want, Sensei, you're badass like that."

"Damn right."

And a week later, Siruko texted him "Sensei, I did it!! Minben-san is my boyfriend now aaaaa!! Thanks so much Senseiiii!! (⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)⁄"

And Sensei replied "Good for you. Congrats." then went back to bed. Stared at the ceiling for long goddamn hours. He tweeted to his followers that he didn’t feel good so no video today, and turned off his phone.

And it felt like there was a big black hole in his chest. He didn’t get up to eat, he just stared at the ceiling, hating himself for being such a goddamn coward. He finally knew what it felt to be pierced through the chest like those characters in DbD, only his bleeding wasn’t physical, just metaphorical. The pain was real though. So real it cut him open and every breath was hard to get.

The next day, he moved on. Or at least, he pretended he did. One day of moping was enough. He replied "I'm fine" to everyone who texted him even when he's not. He had to be fine. 

It's just death by a thousand cuts after all.

The next time it happened, Sensei had just finished playing a horror game and he felt accomplished. He was about to reward himself with a cookie even though he doesn't really like sweets, when the notification sound for a video call rings. He answered it automatically and he's greeted by a crying mess, and his heart dropped in response.

"Siruko-san?"

He didn't get an answer. Limone tried to make him calm down and breathe, and thankfully Siruko-san listened to him. The poor guy hiccuped and sniffed, and Sensei was already plotting Mintosu's death. He'll make it look like an accident too. One can’t play video games in prison after all.

"*sniff*... we had.. a fight, tente-… He got angry coz he said I was smothering him. I swear I didn't mean to nag, Sensei! I was just worried coz you know!..... Minben-san doesn't keep normal sleeping hours… well, I don't too so I don’t have the right.. but I was just worried, Chenche-!!"

Sensei pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. Okay, so maybe he won't kill Mintosu, but he deserves a punch. Maybe two. In times like this Limone wished he could run to Tochigi and comfort Siruko in person. He'd been there once for a business-related meeting, and instead of staying in a hotel, Siruko offered their home. It was a nice trip, and he got to meet Siruko's lovely folks and brother. It made him guilty but also fulfilled for some reason, that he was able to stay in Siruko's house and spend time with him. It was something his internet relationship with Mintosu hasn't had yet at that time.

Forcing himself back to the present, Limone took off his glasses and wiped it with his shirt. Ever since he urged Siruko-san to confess, he became somewhat a confidante to their relationship. Siruko would sometimes share the good stuff but also vent out his frustrations. The positive point of this is that Sensei got to talk to Siruko-san, but it low-key stings as well.

"Siruko-san. You know what you were getting into when you started this relationship. Heck, you know Mintosu-san so well, so you should have known that he loves his freedom. I'm not saying you're wrong for worrying, but Mintosu-san is… well, Mintosu-san after all. I'm sure he can take care of himself."

"I know that." Siruko sulked and pouted and sniffed again. He really should blow his nose. Sensei resisted the urge to wipe his tears from the monitor by clenching his hand under the table.

"Sometimes… sometimes I feel that he's not my boyfriend."

Sensei couldn't help it, but this ugly, dangerous thing called hope arises from the pits of his locked-up emotions that he squishes down every single time. He's only human after all. Limone forced himself to remember who it was that made Siruko-san laugh, who it was that Siruko-san always worried about, who it was that Siruko-san loved, and gods Sensei wished it was him, but it's not.

In his wallowing he didn't realize Siruko-san was still talking, "...and he doesn't even text me good night, and I'm not asking for so much romantic stuff, but would it kill him to at least say he loves me too?"

Siruko stopped, waiting for a reply that Sensei forced through the shards of glasses in his throat. He killed the thought that sprung in his mind, "I'll tell you I love you everyday if you were mine.", and instead he settled for, "No, it wouldn't kill him." 

Sensei continued because he doesn’t hate Mintosu-san. The guy's a good guy, and he can see why Siruko fell for him. Even his annoying sides are endearing. Sensei wanted to defend his side that Siruko-san might have missed.

"But Siruko-san, you knew he wasn't the romantic, hearts-and-roses type of guy, and you fell for him anyway. Don't you think it's a bit unfair of you to expect him to suddenly be a sweet-honey-words kind of guy? If you really wanted things like that, talk to him about it. Guide him through it, coz for all that idiot's bountiful of APEX skills, he sucks when it comes to emotions. Talk to him properly, and maybe back off with the nagging a little bit."

Siruko considered his words and looked thoughtful, and Sensei swallowed the bile coming up his throat, half-wishing they’d break up even though he just helped fix the misunderstanding. Finally, after long minutes of silence, Siruko showed a hint of that really cute, embarrassed smile. "Thanks Sensei. You're really good with advice."

"Tell me something I don't know."

Siruko chuckled a little and Sensei was content with that, he told himself. Just that slight hint that he was able to make Siruko-san feel better was enough. He doesn't want more, he lied to himself. "I might start to call you love-sensei now www. How come you're so good with relationship advice but you don't have a girlfriend? Want me to set up someone for you?"

"Do it and I'll kill you. You're lucky I don't charge you consultation fees."

"Coz you love me~" Siruko sang playfully.

You have no idea, Sensei thought hard. "I'll fucking kill you, bakagayo! Now if you don't have anything else to say, I'm gonna go to sleep."

"It's just 12 midnight! Since when do you sleep so early?"

I actually won’t. I'll lie down and imagine ways I could treat you better than he can, then hate myself for thinking such evil, selfish thoughts. But Sensei replied instead, "I just played a horror game and I went out today, so I'm a bit tired." Sensei knew Siruko-san would feel guilty he disturbed Sensei, that's how well he knew Siruko-san by now, so he followed up immediately. "Shut up, don't apologize. I'd always make time for you, you know that." The teacher said quietly. "We're friends, aren't we?"

Siruko's pretty lips lifted up in one corner wistfully. "Yeah."

The conflict of Sensei liking that smile versus the painful confirmation that they'll only ever be friends clenched Sensei's heart tight. "Then, good night Siruko-san. Ja na, mata ne.”

"Bye bye. Thank you, Sensei."

Sensei lay awake the whole night, until dawn came and the golden rays of the sun filter through his windows. It's like this every time, and Sensei should have been used to it, but he's not. He let the pain wash over him, thinking he might not be a sadist like what people think, but instead he might actually be masochistic.

But he'll be alright. It was just death by a thousand cuts.

The third time, or he's not sure since it's been so long enough that he's not keeping count anymore, it was Siruko-san's birthday. He had just finished streaming Minecraft, and he put the Bintroll stream on background while he got something to drink. He didn't notice at first, but he knew something was wrong. Siruko-san was good at pretending, sometimes too good, so it's no surprise if the listeners didn't hear it, if even his own friends didn't know. But Sensei knew, heard that off-note, that slightly forced laugh, slightly louder, more exaggerated reaction. From the way Bintroll reacted too, they knew it, or at least have noticed it enough, but the show must go on. It's a livestream, and it's an unwritten rule among streamers that no one should break down during that. He knows that Siruko-san is happy, he really is, but something was missing. Or someone.

"Call me when you're done streaming." He typed on LINE, knowing Siruko-san is checking his phone. Not for his message of course. Never for his.

They finished the stream without reading the superchat donation, partly because Siruko-san was tired laughing and talking from the stream, but Sensei knew the other reason. He waits, but he also knew Siruko-san wouldn't call, because he doesn't like imposing on someone, troubling someone for something he thinks he can endure, even if it breaks his heart. He's too kind to do that, even if that was dumb. How many times has Sensei told him it was okay to rant to him, to call him when he's in trouble, or even when he's just bored? How many times has Siruko-san done it too, but each time Sensei has to reassure him that it was okay, he's not disturbing, that Sensei wants to listen to him. Siruko-san is truly dumb and masochistic, keeping everything to himself until he explodes with it, and there will be ugly messy crying and moping for days and drowning in alcohol and not leaving his bed. Sensei knew him too well. And if it was in Sensei's power to, if not protect him from things that can hurt him, then to pick him up when he's down, Sensei will do it, no questions asked.

Maybe Sensei is dumb and masochistic too, he realizes, as he dialed Siruko-san's number.

After 14 rings, during which Sensei is thinking of a hundred and one ways of killing Mintosu even if he has grown to also be close and endeared to the guy thanks to Siruko-san's efforts of getting the three of them to play together, Siruko finally picked up. He's silent, but Sensei knew he's there, and it just meant he wasn't in the mood to talk. Sensei could pick up the low sounds of sniffing and knew he was crying. Damn it. Sensei could take a million broken bones if it was just him, but just a hint of Siruko-san hurting and his knees lose strength.

"What happened." He demanded, but nothing. Silence answered him. Sensei waits and waits and waits. It always took so much coaxing, because no matter how friendly and sunny and cheerful Siruko-san always appears to be, he's an introvert who has insecurities deeper than the ocean and a long list of anxieties making it hard for him to open up sometimes. But Sensei is a patient man. He's already broken the walls Siruko built, passed through the mazes of Siruko's brilliant mind and fragile heart, and if Siruko-san makes more walls, Sensei won't ever be tired of breaking it down. Because beyond those walls is a precious, child-like heart that only wanted to be loved and accepted and happy, and it was very simple to give those things to him. Sensei knew he could give it.

"Minben-san."

"What."

"He…" Sensei sees it without really seeing it. The opening of the waterworks, tears flowing down. "He promised.. he'd come."

And Sensei understood immediately. Goddamnit, that fucking idiot. He could picture Siruko waiting, checking his phone from time to time, waiting for a Discord notification. Smiling and laughing as people wish him happy birthday, and it makes him happy, it really does, but it's different.

"Sensei.. you're really smart, right? You're love-sensei, right? So can you tell me…" Siruko sobbed, breaking Sensei's heart to a million pieces. "...what do you do.. when the one who means the most to you… is the one who didn't show?"

Sensei held his breath. Horror games he can do. Minecraft he can do. This? He doesnt fucking know how to fix this.

"Sensei… thank you by the way… you… you gave me superchat even in the middle of you streaming…You always do that, and it’s really thoughtful...  that was really nice… thank you."

And Siruko dropped the call. Sensei clenched his fist, wanting to punch something. It was 4am, but he moved into motion almost without thought. Bought a train ticket to Tochigi and boarded the first train as soon as the station opened, carrying nothing but his wallet and phone and earpods. It took about two hours, and he stared as the view changed from high-rise skyscrapers to something a little more green, a little more rural. He took a cab to the address he knew so well; he's been here so many times that he's already a familiar face.

"Sensei..?" Hakotaro-san opened the door, surprised, but also relieved. He let him in without so much ado, even though it was too early. Sensei realized it's a Sunday, and it's still breakfast time. It's a weird time to come over a house, but maybe Hakotaro-san has an idea of why he came. He said "ojamashimasu” and took off his shoes.

Papataro and Mamataro were surprised to see him, but they welcomed him with warm smiles, asked him how he'd been, took him to the dining table and forced him to eat breakfast with them. Sensei really likes them--this house, their family--and it makes him miss his own back in Hokkaido. He apologized for coming unannounced and gave them the big cake he bought in haste because it's rude to come to a house without a gift, and they waved him off, telling him it's alright, although Siruko-chan's still in his room, probably still asleep. It's not a surprise to Sensei because he knows Siruko-san doesn't eat breakfast. He chatted with them and felt warm, because they treat him like he's a part of the family too, and Sensei knows where Siruko-san got his kindness from. Siruko and Hakotaro got their looks from their father, but they both got their mother's sweet smile.

He waited in the living room and scratched Baron absently as Hakotaro-san came up to his Niisan's room, and Sensei chuckled when he heard Siruko's loud, panicked shriek. Sensei liked cats more than dogs, but Baron is a good good boy. He's a bit older now so he's calmer and more domestic than most dogs, and Sensei loves his quiet company. Hakotaro-san came again and brought him snacks and a glass of water, and Baron followed his master and jumped on his lap like he's still a puppy even though he's bigger now. They sat in silence, because while they're friendly enough to have exchanged banter or two, Sensei's actually a bit more quieter and serious off the camera, off his online persona. The silence was actually nice, comfortable even, because it gave Sensei time to think and evaluate. Why the hell did he come here so impulsively?

"You would have been better for him, Sensei."

Sensei almost choked on his own spit, actually coughed a bit at that statement, shock covering his face. Hakotaro-san continued to brush Baron's fur as if he just announced the weather and not like he just delivered the finishing blow to Sensei's already pining heart.

"I--uh… what?"

"Don't get me wrong. I love Minben-san too, and I can see how he tries his best to make Niisan happy, and I'm supportive of them. But Minben-san…. He's too independent, too free. Niisan's better off with someone he can spoil but also someone who spoils him. Niisan likes to be needed, but also is needy himself. I know Minben-san is trying, and I know he loves Niisan with all his heart, but if it was you, Sensei, it would have been easier. Less clashing. You're both equals in a sense that Niisan can give and take, that… forgive my Kansai metaphor for the lack of better expression, Niisan can be boke but also tsukkomi. You balance each other in a way."

And the truth is, Sensei did think that too. It's not that Mintosu-san is a bad guy, but he's someone that was already happy and content by playing games, and complicated things like emotions and things like that is not his forte. He's been friends with the guy long enough to know who he actually is even off the camera. Mintosu did not strike him as someone who could be raw and open, which is something you need for a relationship to work. And Mintosu also seemed that kind of guy who would feel confined with the commitments of a relationship.

Mintosu-san is a great guy, a really good person, but he's not a natural lover. He's tough and doesn't mince his words and doesn't do the hearts-and-flowers and the feelings thing, and that's not wrong, but sometimes Sensei thinks he has a better relationship with his fans and listeners than with Siruko-san. He was always more considerate of them, kinder, gentler, and maybe it’s because that kind of human interaction is simpler and easier.

But that doesn't mean Mintosu didn't love Siruko. Heck, it's a testament to how much he loves Siruko-san because he always tries hard to be what he's not. Sensei knew that Mintosu-san tries his best to remember important events, to send gifts and take Siruko out on dates, to be more generous with his I love yous. Mintosu-san is good for Siruko-san; he knows Siruko-san full well and understands every part of him, and they can be a really good team when they try hard enough. They have this shared history that Sensei can't ever replicate. Sensei acknowledged, respected, and supported their relationship with all his being; heck, he's even the one that triggered it into happening. 

And Sensei hated himself everyday for this, but he wished he was Mintosu. That if one thing had been different in this universe, he wished he could have been what Siruko's heart wanted. That he was the one who received Siruko's kind, loving smiles, who got to make love to him, who got to give him the happiness he very much deserved. Limone-sensei would have been so good to Siruko-san, would have given him the attention he craved and the reassurances he needed. He would have been strict to him because Siruko tended to forget everything when he's so addicted to a game, would have crashed his stream to scold him to eat, but he also would have given in to Siruko's whinings, because there's very little Sensei can deny Siruko-san. He already does all of these things, but only as a friend, never more than that. He would have given him the universe if Siruko-san asked for it. 

But Sensei had no time to indulge this self-pity, because his universe came out of the room, covered head to toe with a soft, velvety brown blanket. His beautiful purple eyes were puffy from crying, and he looked like he hadn't gotten any sleep. Sensei wanted to bundle him up and just envelop him in his arms to protect him from anything that might hurt him, but in this universe, he didn't have the right to do that.

"What are you doing here?" Siruko-san pouted. Sensei wondered if he was disappointed that it wasn't his lover that came to surprise him. His voice was hoarse, either from streaming or crying, Sensei didn't know, but he hated it. Hated that he couldn’t take care of Siruko-san the way he wanted to, because in this universe, Siruko’s heart wants what it wants, and that was Mintosu-san. 

"I brought you cake. Happy late birthday."

"I don't like sweet things though." Siruko-san sat between his brother and Sensei and casually placed his head on Sensei's shoulder, because they're close enough friends he could do that. Totally platonic, to Sensei's disappointment, but Sensei let him. That's one thing about Siruko-san, he's clingy and surprisingly craves touch. Sensei draped one arm over him and pats Siruko's shoulder, and he thought about where he finds this easy to do, Mintosu would have been repulsed yet forced to give this level of affection. He felt bad for Mintosu-san, but not that much, because at least Siruko's heart belonged to him.

Sensei rolled his eyes in response. "Yeah, like I didn't know that. It was lemon cake."

Siruko snorted playfully underneath the blanket. "Because it's from you?"

"What else?"

The three of them sat in silence for a while. It should have been weird but it wasn't, at least not to them. Sensei decided to break the silence and finally reveal what he came here for. His exhaustion suddenly washed over him--a few intermittent naps on the train wasn't enough--but he had to do this. He'll never let Siruko-san cry again, not if he can help it.

"Go take a bath and wear some nice clothes, bakatare. We're going somewhere."

Siruko sat up like a puppy who had been called to attention. "Where?"

"To Nara, to Mintosu-san's house."

He saw the hurt and betrayal and refusal in Siruko's eyes, but there was also this hope and desire that made Sensei feel what he's doing is right even though it's not what he wants to do at all. "I-it's okay Sensei," Siruko denied, "I-it's really okay and I… I'm used to this. Minben-san texted me that he forgot and got tired from streaming so he fell asleep, that's all. You don't have to do this and I… I'm fine."

Sensei stared at him hard and Siruko flinched. "There's no reason to go there, and besides, I'm sure he's busy, and--"

"Does there need to be a reason?!" Sensei suddenly raised his voice, and he stilled himself. Sometimes it's so hard to control his emotions, and he's so so angry but he can't be, because there was no black and white here. He can't blame Mintosu for unknowingly hurting Siruko because he had never been that kind of guy anyway, one who prepares romantic stuff to surprise his lover on his special day. It was an honest mistake on his part, and even that was just, so Mintosu. And he also can't blame Siruko-san for this, for expecting something more, because it was his right as a boyfriend, his right to get the simple happiness he wanted. Sensei took a deep breath to calm himself. Here were two people who loved each other but sucked at showing it, and if all they needed was a little push, a little nudge to the right direction, then Sensei was willing to make himself fall apart just so they could both be whole.

"You want to see him, don't you?" Sensei said in a hushed voice. He glanced at Hakotaro-san who didn't interfere and made a reaction, just watching them. "If you want to see him, that's good enough reason, Siruko-san. And when you see each other, you'll fight and be at each other's throat, but also make up and forgive, because you can't let this misunderstanding be unresolved. It'll be a festering wound, and I can only see this incident as something that'll come back and bite you in the future. I know both of you too well because you are my friends. I know you, Siruko-san, that you'll say you're fine now but you'll never forget this, and you'll bring this up against him every time you see the chance, because you were hurt and you'll want him to acknowledge it. And I know Mintosu-san, that he'll get sick of it because he can't tolerate your emotional needs, he'll push you away and turn the blame on you again like he always does, because he has always been a prideful person. And you're both idiots but you're both not wrong for being what you both are. So if I have to drag you to Mintosu-san's house by stuffing all 175cm of you in a suitcase, I swear I will, because you both need to talk."

Siruko freezed, processed everything that Sensei said, and stormed back to his room and shut his door with a loud bang, because for all their silly fighting, Siruko is too similar to Mintosu sometimes, both idiots who likes to bottle their emotions inside of them, and when confronted with it, will run away from it. Hakotaro-san hummed in consideration, making Sensei jump a little because he had honestly forgotten about him.

Sensei cleared his throat. "What?"

"You're right, of course, but I still stand by what I said. Their chemistry is too… explosive, and that can be a good or a bad thing. Their similarities make it stable, but both being water signs, one moment they can be as peaceful as a lake, then the next it's a raging tsunami. Them knowing each other so well works for them, because they have their own level of understanding no one can reach, but that also means they know each other's buttons and what ticks each other off, and they both use it against the other. I don't like that Niisan always has to apologize first and he just goes along with what Minben-san wants so they don't clash, but I also don't like Minben-san being forced to go out of his comfort zone to be this person Niisan needs him to be. Their love can be something so very beautiful, but it can also easily turn into something toxic.

On the other hand, while you and Niisan are very different from each other, it's complementary. What the other lacks, one makes up. People have this misconception that Niisan is outgoing, but he just finds it easier to make friends on the internet. So while you, Sensei, is extroverted, it complements Niisan being introverted. Niisan's patience can keep up with your need to try new things, and your ability to back down works with Niisan's need to be right all the time. You're fire and water and it shouldn't work but it can because you're both emotionally mature and flexible enough to balance each other out."

Sensei didn’t get scared easily, but now he did, because his palms are getting clammy and there might be actual goosebumps at his nape. Was… Hakotaro-san reading his mind? Did Hakotaro-san… know he's been harboring these feelings for his older brother all this time? He knew the younger one had always been observant and intelligent like his Niisan, but to this extent? Sensei resisted the urge to shiver.

"Why… are you telling me this?"

Hakotaro-san shrugged. "No reason. I know Minben-san and Niisan will get through this, especially with you always helping their relationship. I want what's best for my Niisan, but I also want what makes him happy. Give me a moment to talk some sense to him. He'll only go to Nara if you come with him, so, yoroshiku onegaishimasu." Hakotaro-san bowed slightly and Sensei was a second too late to return it, mind reeling from the analysis the blonde just revealed, and by the time he recovered, Hakotaro was already in his brother's room, and he's left alone with Baron and Pii-chan in the living room.

It took everything in Sensei to not get undone in that living room, to kill the rising hope in his heart that maybe, maybe he has a chance. Maybe he should just let this incident go, so that if their relationship sours, Sensei can swoop in and show Siruko-san how to be properly loved and treated. If they break up, Mintosu will be free of this emotion thing that shackles him and do what he loves the most, sometimes more than his own boyfriend, which is gaming, and that would be best for him. And Siruko, sweet, dearest Siruko, won't have to settle with the scraps of affection and attention Mintosu-san gives him, because Sensei can do it. Sensei can come to every one of his birthday stream and be touchy and affectionate and open, and he can love him more than this. 

Gods, he wished he was a horrible enough person so he can be capable of ruining a relationship.

An hour passed, and Hakotaro-san told him his Niisan was calm now, so Sensei entered his room. Siruko, who looks like a burrito with that blanket bundling him, glared angrily at him, but without any heat. Sensei settled on his gaming chair.

"You're mean." And the buriko ojiisan actually stuck his tongue out at him, the nerve.

He's mean?! As if Mintosu didn't bully him every time. Tch. "So?"

"Do you even know how far Tochigi and Nara is? It's like 6 hours away by train."

"And if your dramatic ass didn't throw up a tantrum, we would have been in the train by now."

"See?? Meanie!!" Siruko accused, turning his back to Sensei. "I'm not sure I wanna talk to him. I don't even know what to say to him."

And Sensei thought, this is it. He could say that they didn't have to go, and let this misunderstanding pile up with their other issues until it blows in their face. But he glanced at their rare framed picture on Siruko's desk, with their wide smiles, Mintosu's arm draped over Siruko's shoulder while holding a peace sign and Siruko looking at Mintosu with such adoration in his eyes, and Sensei can’t. 

"I'm sure you can think of something during that stupid 6 hour ride."

And Siruko looked back at him, gave him this soft, grateful smile and said okay, and Sensei tasted cotton balls in his mouth. If only Siruko knew how awful Sensei's thoughts were, he wouldn't be so trusting of him. Sensei's stomach is filled with gravel, and it makes his body heavy and sick with something medicine can’t cure. A martyr, that’s what he was, or a living thing but dead inside. Loving Siruko-san was the most exquisite form of self-destruction.

And in the train ride to Nara, where Siruko spent most of the time sleeping on Sensei's shoulder, Sensei should be feeling happy with this moment of just the two of them. But he didn’t.

It just felt like death by a thousand cuts.

And later, Mintosu, who did this stupid perfect impression of a fish out of the water with his surprise to see them in his apartment, jaw dropped and eyes wide, let them in. Siruko was silent and kept biting his lips, and Mintosu was genuinely confused, and Sensei would like to punch them both and go home. So Sensei acts like a mediator, almost like a marriage counselor, and at first Mintosu and Siruko refuse to let their emotions out, but Sensei shouts at them that he didn't come all the way from Tokyo for this bullshit, so they let their frustrations out and shout at each other, and Mintosu almost storms out in anger but Sensei doesn't let him, and Siruko cries this angry tears but Sensei forces him to calm down, and they both manipulate each other's emotions and are both stubborn and vindictive, but in the end they come to an agreement to be more understanding and more open with their feelings and with a promise to always talk and communicate, and they make up. Sensei faked forgetting to make an important phone call and stepped outside to give them some privacy, because the last thing he needed was to see them kiss in front of him. 

At midnight they went out and ate the best ramen in town and it was really delicious, and they traded jokes and laughed and talked about their favorite things. Sensei slept on the couch while the couple slept in Mintosu's room, and Sensei didn’t really get any sleep, because he's busy trying not to imagine what they must be doing on the other side of the apartment, and hating himself for being unable to be an awful person because once again, he probably has contributed more to this relationship more than any outsider has or needed to, and he tries to be happy for them because they are happy and in love.

Sensei asked the Mintosu's ceiling if he'll be alright and it said, "I don't know."

The last time, it wasn't really the last, but it did feel like the end. It's been more than a year, and one day, as they finished shooting a video, Mintosu DM-ed Sensei.

It's not that unusual, since Mintosu and Sensei did develop their own friendship outside of their collabs, partly because of Siruko. Sensei kind of became their go-to person when they're in trouble with their relationship, and it kills Sensei but also makes him feel like he's not completely a terrible person if he was able to help them out.

It was rare though, for Mintosu to reach out first. So Sensei voice-called him, partly because he wanted to rest his fingers, and partly because he'll be able to hear Mintosu's emotions through his voice.

"Moshi moshi Sensei!"

"Hai hai, mosh mosh, doushita doushita."

"Ano.. I was kind of wondering if… how do you say this… if you had any advice for me..?"

That was weird. Mintosu, unsure of himself? At loss for words? Is there a zombie apocalypse outside his door right now?

"For what?"

"Coz I… um… I'm planning to ask Siruko-san to marry me."

And the world stopped spinning. Time stood still, and the world turned into shades of gray. Sensei’s heart gets caught up in his throat, and his insides were being turned into mush.

"...Sensei?" 

Sensei shook his head to clear his mind, but it's so hard to breathe. He regretted voice calling now, because it's so hard to talk when his throat felt like acid. "C...Congratulations, teme!! W-wow this is such a big.. move, like wow, really. Dude, congrats…"

"Thanks Sensei! You're actually the third person I told, after my family and my best friend. I'm kinda nervous and excited for it!"

"Y-yeah… I bet you are… Listen, can I go to the toilet for a bit?"

"Sure, iterrashai!"

Sensei ran to the toilet and hurled the dinner he ate, his hands shaking. He splashed water on his face to calm himself down. He'd seen this coming, taught himself how to react when he hears the news, trained himself to accept it, but it still came crashing down on him like boulders on a landslide. This was his worst nightmare coming true.

"I’m back."

"Osu!"

"So… advice huh?"

"Yeah! The ring stuff, my bestfriend can take care of that, coz I have zero knowledge in that area hahaha. But I still don't know how to ask him. Should I go for the dinner style? Or the… blegh, ring on champagne thing? Coz I really dont wanna have to, thinking about it makes me puke, blegh."

And Sensei felt horrible for this, he really did, but he told Mintosu… what he let himself imagine in the middle of the night when he lets the devil in him take over, when he would revel in his deepest, darkest fantasies, things he would have done for Siruko-san. How he would have proposed. 

Siruko-san deserved something grand, but also private. Sensei would have made a scavenger hunt for him, but one Siruko can do in his house because he doesn't like going out, so he'll need to ask Hakotaro-san for help. It's perfect for him, since he loves games, and he's good at solving problems and figuring things out. The next puzzle pieces will come from Bintroll, and Siruko-san can VC or chat with them about it. It will give him time to spend with the people he loves the most, and when he looks back at this memory, Siruko-san would love that they were involved. The last puzzle piece would take him to a hotel though, for their privacy. Sensei would have pulled out all stops for him, rose petals and candles everywhere (he leaves this part out because he doesn’t think Mintosu-san will do this, nor does it suit him), and he imagined Siruko-san confused but super touched at the romantic gesture, and then Sensei would come out and give him an embarrassing but heartfelt speech about how much he loves him and wants to spend forever with him, that Siruko was his lifeline (like the character they both like in APEX), that a man like Sensei can only love someone that greatly once, so Siruko was his one and only. Sensei imagined Siruko-san getting a bit emotional with the speech and cracking a joke to lighten the mood, and then he'd fall down on one knee and tell him how he loves everything about Siruko-san, his good leadership and charisma that makes everyone around him respect and treasure him, his supportive side that lifts everyone around him up, and even his demanding, whiny side that makes you wanna scold him but also indulge him. 

And they would have been good for each other. They compensate for what each other doesn't have. They bring out the best in each other. Where Sensei was sometimes emotionally distant, Siruko's empathy and warmth fills that. Where Siruko was full of insecurities and anxieties, Sensei was the confidence and the daring that would support him. They both have a loud personality, which, in a non-arrogant way, has this center-of-attention thing that charms people so well, but also, they both have a side that sometimes hides in the background blending in quietly, and that's what make it's so balanced, because when one roars, the other one knows how to shut up, and vice versa. They can be both assertive and analytical, but they're also both attentive and generous. Sure, they would have had some friction, but they were both understanding enough to have handled it. It would've been sweet, if it could've been him. It would've been fun, if Sensei was the one.

They would have been as natural and beautiful as the purple-blue daybreak sky.

But it wasn't. In this world, it was Mintosu that Siruko wanted and loved. Mintosu who gets to wake up in the morning next to him, who got to cook curry for him and take care of him, who got to hold him in his arms. And they still worked, despite the seemingly destructive fights, because they were proof that if two people tried hard enough, they could make it work. Siruko learned how to assert his opinions and call out Mintosu for his bullshit, and Mintosu learned how to listen and be more showy with his affection. They still have their worse moments, and sometimes they both treat their issues the same way: either pretending it didn't exist even if it bothered them, or giving the other the cold silent treatment, or have screaming fights where they throw their words like knives, and on the worst ones, someone has to interfere, most times (to his agony), it was Sensei who did. But they pulled through by some miracle, and Sensei was happy for them, he really is. They make a good couple when they actually cooperate, and Sensei wouldn’t have approved of any other man other than Mintosu-san for Siruko-san.

And Mintosu-san actually did follow Sensei's advice, to his surprise. Sensei volunteered to make the scavenger hunt for him because that's not Mintosu's strength, but he helped and made an effort to be involved in the process. There were no roses or candles or long speeches, only the few words of: "Siruko-san, I want you to be my partner in everything; in gaming and in life. Marry me." And Siruko didn't believe him at first and thought it was a prank, but when he saw Minben-san was serious for once, he dived into Minben-san's arms and shouted “Yeeees!” And Mintosu-san almost drops the ring but he was able to catch Siruko, and they laughed while their eyes got a bit moist and they spent the whole night reveling in each other's presence and owning each other in all senses. Limone-sensei knew this because they both told him, and he congratulated them sincerely and joked about buying them PC gear for their wedding gift, and later finally let himself cry for the first time.

That was months ago. Sensei's now dusting off his black suit and adjusting his navy blue tie while sitting on his chair, waiting for the wedding ceremony to start. There were two aisles that meet in a center altar, where the officiant is already on standby. Sensei was one of the few lucky people invited in the small ceremony, as usually most people attended the reception instead. Both Mintosu and Siruko wanted him to come, as they said they both owe their relationship to him. Sensei couldn't say no even if he tried, of course. Some good part of him was still proud at what he's done to help, even if his heart dropped to his stomach and shattered to a million pieces at the thought of attending the wedding he very much wanted to be his.

The grooms arrived and walked the aisle, but of course Sensei was only looking at Siruko-san. He was beautiful, with his purple hair combed well and there were no longer dark shadows in his eyes. Not that he has ever been any less beautiful to Sensei, because Sensei found his tired or drunk state equally cute, but this, his wide smile full of nervousness and excitement, his purple eyes shining with glee, it was too much for Sensei, because it wasn't meant for him. He choked on bitter bile and coughed, and beside him Shoichi side-eyed him worriedly. He was the only one who knew, of course. Sensei couldn't have confided in Hanachan; he was already too busy with his own things to think about, and plus, he wouldn’t understand why Sensei backed off. He would have urged Sensei to pursue Siruko-san. Shoichi only knew because he and Sensei went out eating one day and ended up in a bar, and Sensei couldn't hold his alcohol well and accidentally ranted. Shoichi promised he'd never tell anyone, and Sensei knew Shoichi also wanted to ask Sensei why he never tried, but the editor didn’t, only offered silent consolation like a brother. It helped him get through the pain and the heartache, but it never fully healed. This kind of pain lasts a lifetime, because the only love that lasts is unrequited love.

And as they exchanged vows, Sensei tried to let go. He's known for a long time now, what love really means. It meant making difficult, painful choices for the happiness of another person, more than your own. Loving Siruko was the most beautiful and tragic thing he's ever done, but it was okay. He sees Mintosu gaze at Siruko with the same loving eyes he has, and that was good enough. Perhaps such a great love like Sensei had was never meant to be returned, but it will be alright.

And when they kissed, Sensei thought it was okay. People fall in love with people they can't have all the time.

He'll be alright. It was just death by a thousand cuts.

And this story did have a happy ending, just not for him.

The end.

Ren’s RANT that you don’t have to read:

About the story!

Please don't hate Minsan. I love that guy so much and even though him forgetting birthdays is almost a canon-like thing he can do, my good friend Hotaru (who likes to pretend she is Minsan's wife) pointed out that Minben-san doesn't seem like a person who would forget someone's birthday especially if it was someone special to him. He'd most likely buy you a present, although he might forget to give it to you on your actual birthday. 😂😂😂 and that's okay, it was an honest mistake on his part, that's the reason why Sensei wouldn't punch him and Siruko-san forgave him easily. It's just a Minsan thing and I love him.

I also want to point out that Minsan is also emotionally intellectual in a sense that he analyzes feelings and emotions very well, and if you watch his streams he actually has a side to him that's good at self-introspection. We just think he's not the type to show his vulnerable self, and that's why he doesn't really show up much in Bintroll livestreams, because he's more comfortable with gaming than casual chatting, and that's okay. Please don't think I don't ship MinSiru too; I was the biggest MinSiru fan and I still am, and I have probably influenced so many to their ship too. I like their dynamics as well, but as someone who has watched Minben-san for quite a bit of a long time, lately I realized that when it comes to him, Mintosu x Fans are the true canon ship. If you watch his streams closely, you'll know how much he cares about his listeners and really truly genuinely enjoys his interactions with them. He's a complex man; he has different sides of him in the Hanae channel, Bintroll channel, and his own channel, and if you watch him more, you'll fall in love with how close he is to his listeners. That's why I think Mintosu x Fans is canon www (ship MinRen for world peace and clear skin!!) (Ren who imagines herself with Minsan more than Minsan with Siruty)

I see Mintosu as someone who cannot be tied down by a relationship because that’s not him, and that’s okay because you can already see his happiness by gaming, and I love him for that.

This fic is controversial (and that's why it took me a full week to decide whether to publish it) in a sense that I've given some bad points about MinSiru. I did give them some good points, but since it's Sensei POV, it came across as sad. But just because it would be difficult doesn't mean it wouldn't work. Trust me, I'm in a relationship with someone who's almost like Min-san in personality, but we've been together for almost 3 years now. I used to think Siruko-san was a saint for enduring all Mintosu-san's trolls, coz if that was me, I would be annoyed, but there's a reason why Mintosu only does it to Siruko; it's because he's the most comfortable with Siruko3. Siruko-san is patient and understanding enough to deal with Minsan's quirks, and Minsan is also loves his company. They are more similar than people think, and that's why it's easy for them to be in sync. It'll be difficult, but it'll work. Believe me.

LimoSiru rant:

I think I’m getting better at writing angst wwww it’s just sad because if one really watched closely all four channel’s livestreams and videos, they’d see LimoSiru is beautiful too. They may not have had shared history and sexual tension, but it’s obvious how Siruko-san really supports Sensei in everything, and Sensei in return supports Bintroll even if he didn’t have to, and that’s beautiful.

I think part of the reason why I ship LimoSiru is because they make it so easy for me. It's not my fault when they are the ones who make all these cute, flirty interactions. I've started shipping them since the Fall Guys stream and have noticed how incredibly cute their relationship is. Imagine someone crashing your stream because he had this puzzle he couldn’t solve and because you’re so smart, he goes to you instead, not caring if you are currently streaming or if there are fans watching. Like seriously, Sensei, don’t you have friends? Or couldn’t you just LINE Siruko-san afterwards? If it seems like LimoSiru just happened all of a sudden, I assure you it didn’t. It’s always been there, and they started as friends too. It's almost enemies to friends to something more. In the Dedomental video, Mintosu asks Siruko-san where his name came from, although he jokes it’s kinda dirty. If you watch Sensei’s POV, you’ll hear him laugh and say “I think it’s a good name.” Siruko-san always crashes Sensei’s stream and Sensei does the same, and I found it especially cute when Sensei always superchats in Siruko’s birthday stream; first, when he played DbD with them, and on the second, isn’t it cute how he sends superchat while he’s streaming, like he doesn’t have to do that, but he did. Even in the Bintroll 100k stream, he helped them make the DbD minecraft after his own stream, and that was so on-the-spot, and the fact that he did that even though he could have just ended his stream and rested, is very thoughtful. And have you watched that sudden stream that took our wigs off? Bintroll had just received their silver play and moments later Sensei wanted a stream with Siruko-san, when he could have just congratulated them on Twitter or LINE. The conversations, gods they sound like two people who were in the early stages of dating, and it felt like we listeners were third-wheelers. They learned their lesson on stream #2 because the conversations were more proper and they kept themselves in check, but that raw, unfiltered, natural first stream was everything. I’ve always had so little content for LimoSiru and even if they didn’t do that I would have been happy, but now with that big, fat LimoSiru official thumbnail there, I have died and ascended to heaven. (As of the release of this post, they have interacted almost everyday for a week, and I don't know what to do with all these interactions! I've been so used to little content and now I'm just… dead)

But not everyone ships like me, I guess, one who can ship anything and everything equally. At the end of the day, nothing is canon. That’s the real angst in this post, hahahaha. I know the characters in my mind are different from the people who livestreams in real time, no matter how much I always try to keep the characterization close. So let’s just enjoy supporting them in our own ways.

Thank you for reading! I love you~~

[star-spangled-eyes]

HOT 🔥 One-Shot: Baby, It’s Cold Outside

This alternate universe fan fiction uses characters created and owned by Pixelberry Studios. Character names, descriptions and likenesses are owned by Pixelberry Studios. The story and words are created and owned by this author.

Book: The Royal Romance (Alternate Universe)

Pairing: Drake Walker x MC (Bragnae Bennett -- *pronounced Brawn-yah)

A/N:  My friend told me about a contest on Wattpad to write a steamy rendition of my favorite holiday song. I was really excited to give this a try because I was just listening to Baby, It’s Cold Outside the other day and thought about how suggestive it really is. I knew I could have some fun with it.

The contest parameters were to write the song into a steamy, short story, 2,000 words or less. Of course I had to use Drake and Bragnae!

Just so you know going into this… I’m using these characters, but it has absolutely nothing to do with canon whatsoever since it’s based solely on this holiday song.

My favorite rendition of this song was sung by Doris Day and Bing Crosby. If you’ve never listened to this song, you can do so here!

The lovely edit was made by my friend @angilala1​ -- it’s fabulous!

Warnings for this one-shot: NSFW, adult content, some language, sex

Word Count for this chapter: 1989

Tagging my permas and a few others I felt would enjoy this:

Permatags: @burnsoslow​​ @cora-nova​​ @dcbbw​​ @thorfosterlove​​ @emceesynonymroll​​ @edgiestwinter​​ @of-course-i-went-to-hartfeld​​ @msjr0119​​ @notoriouscs​​ @drakewalker04​​ @pedudley​​ @desiree-0816​

@i-bloody-love-drake-walker​ @moonlightgem7​ @yukinagato2012​ @addictedtodrakefanfic​ @queenjilian​ @choices-lurker​ @drakexnadira​

Heavy snowflakes began to fall as Bragnae and Drake stepped outside of the movie theater. The weather was frigid as an icy breeze swirled around them. Bragnae quickly buttoned her coat, and threw a hat over the top of her long, black hair.

“I think it dropped a few degrees since we first arrived,” Drake remarked as he zipped up his coat.

“I think you’re right,” she replied, walking blindly into a puddle of slush and cold water. “Oh, shit!”

Drake hurriedly wrapped an arm around her waist to pull her away from the puddle. Her right foot was drenched through her suede knee-high boot. Despite the chill of her now soaked foot, the electricity she felt from Drake’s arm around her filled her body with warmth.

“We should get you warmed up before you freeze. My place is a block from here.”

“No, that’s okay,” she said, shaking off her foot. “I’ll be fine until I get home.”

“No way, Bragnae. I won’t have you getting frost bite on my watch,” he told her as he gently grabbed her hand. “Come on. My house is just a few minutes away.”

She looked up at his handsome face. He wore a bright smile that reached all the way up to his comforting, brown eyes. Unruly wisps of Drake’s chestnut hair fell just above his eyebrow, and light stubble grazed his strong jaw. He was beyond gorgeous.

Bragnae reluctantly nodded as they set out towards Drake’s home. Butterflies fluttered in her stomach with each step.

Bragnae first met Drake when he and her older brother, Murphy, became best friends in high school. They were both hockey players and bonded instantly. She was immediately drawn to Drake then just as she was now – several years later.

Drake’s macho persona, good looks and kind heart made him quite irresistible. Over the years, Bragnae attended many hockey games in support of her brother, but her attention would inevitably turn towards Drake.

It surprised Bragnae when he asked her out for a date recently, but she was more than happy to accept. The first time they kissed was spellbinding. Bragnae knew right then she’d always have a hard time resisting Drake, and his lips.

“Here we are,” Drake said, pointing with his free hand.

Bragnae looked over to see a quaint, craftsman-style home sitting peacefully at the end of the street as the snow continued to accumulate around them.

As Drake ushered Bragnae inside his cozy home, she saw that it was furnished with dark-colored furniture, and had hardwood floors throughout. It felt like a rustic cabin inside, yet with modern touches.

Bragnae took off her hat, and began unbuttoning her coat. “You have a lovely home, Drake.”

“Thanks,” he said as he slipped the coat off her shoulders. “Why don’t you take off your boots while I build us a fire?”

“Um, sure,” she said hesitantly as she bent down to unzip her boots. “I really can’t stay, though.”

She cared for Drake, and didn’t want to ruin a potentially meaningful relationship by moving too fast with him. In spite of actually wanting to stay and get closer, she felt it was best to keep things light. At least she would try.

Drake stacked a few logs in the fireplace, and struck a match to get the fire started. “Bragnae, come over here, and get warmed up. I’ve got the fire going.”

She sauntered over to him as Drake stood and smiled, turning towards her. “The fire will be roaring soon. You can sit down on the hearth if you’d like.”

“Thank you, Drake,” she looked at him apologetically. “This whole evening has been very nice. But I really can’t stay.”

Drake gently took her hands in his. “What’s your hurry, Bragnae? It’s a blizzard outside, but it’s nice and warm in here.”

As he smirked at her, she couldn’t help but smile back at him. “Okay, maybe I’ll stay for a few more minutes.”

“Good. Take a seat by the fire, and I’ll go make us a drink.”

As Drake walked off to the kitchen, Bragnae slowly lowered herself to the hearth as her eyes swept over his backside. The man knew how to fill out his jeans. She blushed before looking away.

A few minutes later, Drake returned with two glasses, handing one to Bragnae.

“Thank you,” she said, looking out the window. “I should probably call an Uber, so I don’t have to walk home in this.”

Drake sat down next to her – his knee touching hers. Bragnae’s breath hitched as her gaze found his. The flames danced in his eyes as he smiled.

“I doubt any Uber would want to drive in this.” Drake clinked his glass gently against hers. “Cheers.”

Grinning back at him, she took a swig from her glass, and felt the caramel liquid burn the back of her throat as it went down.

Bragnae delicately coughed to help clear the sting away. “What’s in this drink?”

Drake chuckled. “Just my favorite whiskey.”

“Oh,” she giggled. “It’s very strong.”

“That’s the way I like it,” he said, setting their glasses down. “Is it alright if I move in a little closer?”

You ought to say ‘no’, Bragnae. She nodded, biting her lip. Oops.

Drake shifted a bent knee over the hearth – his fingers brushing her cheek as he looked into her eyes. “You look beautiful tonight, Bragnae.”

Her heart pounded in her chest as he slowly leaned in connecting his soft, ardent lips with hers. Drake placed his firm hand on her thigh, squeezing it gently.

Bragnae excitedly ran her fingers through his hair, pulling him in closer to deepen their kiss. After a few delightfully heated moments, she pulled back knowing if she didn’t now, it would prove difficult later.

“I really can’t stay, Drake. I should go.” Bragnae got up, and headed for the door.

As she reached for her coat, she felt Drake’s arms slink around her waist from behind, holding her close to him. He brushed her hair away before placing a soft kiss on her neck. A shiver shot down her spine.

“Baby, it’s cold outside,” he whispered. “I’ll keep you safe.”

She closed her eyes as his lips moved gradually up her neck. Tell him the answer is ‘no’.

“Drake,” she paused, trying to think of the words she was supposed to say. “Being here has been… so nice and warm. But I should go.”

“Look out the window at the storm, Bragnae,” he muttered against her.

She opened her eyes to peer out the window. The snowflakes were falling harder, and the snow was piling up.

She turned around to see an awakened hunger in his eyes. She couldn’t help but smile. “I’ve got to get home.”

“You’ll freeze out there,” he replied with his gaze locked on her mouth. “God, your lips look delicious,” he said before kissing her tenderly.

Bragnae reveled in his desire for her, and it was most certainly mirrored for him. “What’s Murphy going to think about us doing this?”

“Leave your brother to me.”

Drake slowly backed her up against the front door, keeping minimal space between them. She had to tilt her head just to look at him.

“You keep saying you should leave, but is that really what you want?” Drake slid a hand into the back pocket of her jeans as the other held her face.

With his body pressed up against her and his mouth enticingly close, Bragnae knew exactly what she wanted, and it didn’t involve leaving his arms. Suddenly, she pulled him into a crashing kiss tugging at the belt loops of his jeans.

Bragnae parted her lips as his tongue eagerly found hers. She moaned while his strong hands purposefully roamed her body. Drake’s fingertips tickled the soft skin just above her waistband before lifting her sweater over her head.

The cold air seeping through the seams of the door made her shiver, but Drake’s warmth made her soon forget all about it. She began unbuttoning his plaid, flannel shirt as they kissed. He shrugged out of his top layer, then pulled off the t-shirt underneath.

She took a second to admire his toned chest, running her hand across his tight muscles, and down through a small, dark patch of hair leading to his pants. Undoing his belt buckle, she worked on his jeans next.

Just as she was about relinquish him of his denim restriction, Drake spun her around to face the door. Bragnae gasped as she braced herself on the wooden surface. Within seconds, Drake was nibbling her shoulder as his hands began unbuttoning her pants.

With a slow pull of her zipper, Drake slipped his hand over her satin panties and rubbed expertly against her. A whimpering moan escaped her lungs as she leaned her head back to savor it.

After he gradually slid off her jeans, she turned to face him again. His lips found hers urgently as he hoisted her up in his arms, bringing her back to the living room. The heat from the fire felt good against her skin as its crackling provided the ambient soundtrack to their much anticipated moment together.

With her legs wrapped around his waist, Drake dropped to one knee, and lowered Bragnae to the welcoming, plush rug beneath them. He moved his adoring lips from her mouth, to her neck, and then to her full chest. She felt a rush every time his breath warmed her skin.

She allowed Drake to remove her bra and panties before he kicked off the rest of his clothes. He settled between her widened legs caressing her breasts as their lips met again in a slow rhythm. Bragnae could feel his hard length pressing against her inner thigh, and she ached for it.

Letting another kiss linger, Drake drew up to look her in the eyes. “I really care about you, Bragnae. I always have.”

Her heart soared. “I feel the same way about you, Drake.”

He smiled before returning his eager lips to hers. As he moved above her, Bragnae felt his searching cock find her as he slowly slid inside. Her breath caught in her throat as she felt his fullness breach her throbbing walls.

Drake groaned as she tilted her hips to him, welcoming his entire length. He rested his forehead against hers regaining his composure before continuing to move in and out of her.

Bragnae ran a hand through his hair, gripping it as he increased his speed. She felt him everywhere inside her – reaching depths never before explored. Each thrust felt incredible. His hand found hers, entwining their fingers.

He dipped down to capture her lips again as they moved in harmony with each other. The tenderness and passion between them was overwhelming. Years of never being able to completely express her feelings for him made this moment even more special.

She became lost in Drake’s soft, cherishing touch as his hands surveyed the curves of her body. He never slowed his pace, and soon a delicious warmth started to build at her core. Bragnae’s breaths came quick and short. She gripped Drake’s shoulder as his determined thrusts unleashed a burst of pleasure that continued to pulse throughout her body.

She cried out his name as a mixture of moans and screams were pulled from her lungs. Soon, Drake tensed his body, grasping Bragnae’s hand as he discovered a much sought after release.

As they both caught their breaths, their lips came together in another sweet, lingering kiss. Drake untangled himself, and slid to the floor beside her, pulling her back against his chest and holding her tightly.

Bragnae basked in the satisfying glow of their shared intimate moment as she watched the snow fall outside and the flames from the fire flicker across the room.

She smiled as he kissed her shoulder. “Drake?”

“Yes, Bragnae?” He whispered.

“I’m glad I stayed.”

[ryqoshay]

How to Handle a Maki: Maki’s First Adventure

Primary Pairing: NicoMaki Words: ~8k Rating: T? Maybe G; I’ve been overcautious as of late it seems AU: RPG Time Frame: ??? Story Arc: Stand Alone

Author’s Note: And now I’m writing a fourth fic... yay?

As with the first chapter of Heavenly Life, this serves as a proof of concept, this time for an idea I had when writing HL (AU). If I’m going to start writing a fantasy, non-canon compliant AU for YohaRiko, why not do so for NicoMaki as well?

Also, major thanks to noelclover for providing inspiration via amazing RPG NicoMaki fanart - links will be provided in the followup post. I consider it an honor and a privilege to have been able to brainstorm ideas with a fellow fanwork creator and pray this work lives up to what was in mind upon creation of the aforementioned art.

Edit: Upon reviewing this chapter for purposes of writing something else, I realized something either didn't copy/past right or didn't save correctly when I originally wrote it in Word. As such, I have added a bit just before Maki's first adventure actually begins. Nothing major, just a bit of in-universe explaining as to why some things ended up as they did.

Maki was happy.

For the first time in what seemed like forever, she was truly, honestly, happy. She had arrived at her destination. And had done so all by herself.

She had not ridden in a fancy carriage owned by her family. Instead, she had walked, despite it taking over a week, not just a few days. Along the way, she had not stopped at the homes of local nobles where she knew she would be showered with gifts and granted the best room and board they could offer. Instead, she had stayed at each town’s tavern, where she had rented a room and had eaten the food provide by said taverns. On the nights she was unable to make it to the next town, she had made do with supplies she had brought with her. The clothes she wore were not ornate in any way and did not sacrifice comfort for style. Instead, they were hearty and durable, would not tear at the slightest of snags, and had no hem that needed to be held up to allow her to move.

And, perhaps most important of all, she had been able to earn money on her own, money not given to her by her wealthy parents simply for being their daughter. She had found many opportunities to sing and perform for coins tossed into her hat to help supplement her finances. Nothing about the journey had been extremely luxurious as far as she was concerned, but it had been enough to get by.

Now she stood in front of an old, but sturdy structure that was smaller than she had been led to believe. Her feet were sore from all of the walking, she had depleted much of her rations, she desperately wanted to bathe and sleep in a bed, and the wonderful aroma wafting through the cracks in the door made her stomach grumble, but she was here. She had finally arrived at the guildhouse of the Yazawa branch of the Adventurer’s Guild.

This particular branch had been suggested to Maki by Rin, the fiancée of her friend Hanayo. The two of them had recently started frequenting this location because they were fond of the manager, one Yazawa Nico. Apparently Hanayo and Nico shared some strange obsession with idols, both ancient and contemporary. Rin didn’t quite understand her fiancée’s fascination with statues but was happy to support her in her research and adventures. Maki definitely didn’t get it either, but she trusted Hanayo and thus had decided her first adventure would be some idol research for this Nico person.

She knocked on the door and awaited a response. Nothing for several minutes. She knocked again, a little harder this time.

“It’s unlocked!” A voice came from within.

Unlocked? Maki glanced from side to side. No guards in sight. Was Nico some sort of mage that warded off intruders via magic? Or perhaps Nico was just that trusting of others in the world? Then again, perhaps in the eyes of a thief, this place didn’t look like it was worth looting?

Memories came to her of all the guards, servants and the like who were ever-present around the noble and royal folk and their property. Though certainly possible, it was difficult to harm or steal from those in higher society, if for no other reason than the sheer number of potential witnesses. Heck even the taverns in which she had stayed often had a handful of people around that could deal with situations. But this place…

“You coming in or not?” The voice called again.

“Right, sorry…” Maki replied, finally opening the door. Immediately, a warm breeze slipped past her, carrying with it a potent burst of the aroma she had smelled earlier, causing her stomach to grumble again. “Hello?” She called into the building

“In the kitchen!”

Maki followed the sounds and smells of cooking. Turning the corner, she stopped in her tracks at the sight before her. Without a doubt, she had found the kitchen and the source of the tantalizing smell. But what struck her was the individual currently preparing what looked like a feast for no less than twenty people. With dark black hair pulled up in youthful twintails that bounced along as she practically danced from pot to spit to chopping board was a girl at least two years younger than her, possibly more.

“Welcome!” The girl said, turning a brilliant smile toward her.

“Uhm… is this the Yazawa Branch Guildhouse?” Maki asked.

“You got the right place. Now what can I do for you?” The girl reached over to stir the pot while she talked.

“I’m supposed to ask for the branch guildmaster, Yazawa Nico?”

“You found her.”

“…” Maki blinked. Surly she was being pranked. There was no way a kid was in charge of a guild, even if just a branch.

“So again, what can I do for you?” The girl repeated her previous question, her smile waning ever so slightly as a bit of impatience seeped into her voice.

“I’d… like to speak with Yazawa Nico.”

The smile dissipated entirely, replaced by a scowl as the girl put a hand on her hip. “That’s me.”

Part of Maki wanted to give her credit for her dedication the act, but she needed to get down to business. “Look, kid…” She cut off as a guttural growl came through the girl’s sneer.

“Onee-chan!” a young voice shouted from the direction of the door.

Immediately, the girl’s smile returned, somehow even brighter than when she had initially greeted Maki. Half a second later, a smaller version of the girl barreled past Maki.

“Cocoa!” Another smaller version appeared. “Don’t run in the kitchen when Onee-sama is cooking!”

“Smell good…” A third voice drawled.

There were four of them? Maki’s gaze shifted among them. They all had vibrant crimson eyes and dark hair, though one’s hair was a bit more on the brown side. And she was pretty sure the shortest one was a boy. Maybe…

“Ah, a guest.” The polite one turned toward Maki and greeted her with a bow. “Are you a new recruit?”

“Maybe?” Maki replied.

“That’s wonderful. Onee-sama may be the No. 1 Guildmaster in the Universe, but it has been difficult for her to get new recruits as of late.”

“Cocoro.” The purported No. 1 Guildmaster said with a disapproving air.

“Sorry, Onee-sama.”

“We’re doing just fine here.”

“My name is Cocoro, by the way.” The girl said, turning back to the guest. “And your name?”

“Maki.”

“It has been nice to meet you, Maki-san.” Cocoro smiled. “I’ll go set the table.” She then told her sister.

“Thanks.” The guildmaster then patted the head of the girl still wrapped around her waist. “Cocoa, go play with Cotaro. I’ll call you when dinner is ready.”

“Alright.” Cocoa replied, detaching herself. “Hi, Maki-san.” She said, running past the redhead.

“So, Princess,” Nico turned her attention to Maki “you got a surname to go with that gorgeous face and rude attitude?”

“Gor… rude? P-Princess?” Maki couldn’t decide what to react to first. “What the heck?”

“That’s what your name means, right? True Princess? What, did your parents hope you would marry into royalty or something?”

“No, I, uhm…”

“What, you gotta problem with people knowing your family name?” Nico’s eyes widened. “Maybe you have a bounty on your head?”

“Buweeh?!” Maki balked. “Bounty? No, that’s not it.” She shook her head. “That’s not it at all.”

“Hrm, a shame.” Nico shrugged. “Could’ve used the reward…”

Maki deadpanned at the other girl. “Nishikino. My name is Nishikino Maki.” Though as soon as she said it, Maki wondered if she shouldn’t have come up with an alias instead of using her real name. Her given name was probably fine, but…

“Nishikino Maki.” Nico repeated. “Has a bit of a regal sound to it.”

Wait, did that mean Nico didn’t know about the clerical clan headed by the Nishikino family? What kind of adventurers guildmaster hadn’t heard of the Nishikino clerics, even if just a backwater branch manager?

“I guess…” Maki admitted, reaching up unconsciously to twirl a strand of hair around a finger.

Nico shrugged it off. “So, back to my still unanswered question, what can I do for you?”

“Rin and Hanayo recommended I come here to get a contract.”

“Beginner adventurer, eh?”

Maki wanted to deny and claim that she had some experience, but Nico continued.

“Yeah, I have a few things we could do.”

“We?”

“Of course. I’ll go with you on your first contract or two; show you the ropes of adventuring and dungeon crawling. Cocoro can watch the place while we’re away and everything will be fine.”

“I see…”

“So, I’ll get the paperwork and gear together later and we can head out in the morning. But for tonight, you can join us for dinner then we’ll see about getting you a room.”

“Alright.” Maki found herself getting a little excited. Despite the hiccup with introductions, things seemed to be going well and she was one step closer to her new life of adventure.

“Anyway, I’m almost done here, so go hang out for a bit, but don’t go upstairs.”

“Huh?”

“NozoEli are up there.”

“Nozoeli…?”

“Sorry, Nozomi and Eli.” Nico corrected. “They’re two people, but since they’re practically attached at the hip, some of us refer to them as NozoEli. Kinda like RinPana, the ones who sent you here.”

“I… don’t get it…?” Maki had never heard her friends referred to in such a way.

“Anyway, they’re up there ‘celebrating’ Eli’s successful hunt, so unless you want to be scarred for life, don’t go up there. Nozomi has been pretty good lately in remembering to cast a spell to soundproof the room, but still usually forgets to lock the door, so if you go into the wrong one…” Nico shook her head as thought to clear unwanted memories.

Seems like not locking doors is commonplace around here, Maki mused to herself.

“Mmm… that smells delicious, Nicocchi.” A voice came from the direction of the stairs.

“The kids are here, Nozomi,” Nico replied without even looking “so you’d better be wearing pants this time.”

“Is a skirt alright?”

“You know what I mean.”

The girl coming down from the upper floor giggled. Long purple hair fell down to her hips and green eyes held a gaze that gave the feeling she knew more than she would ever let on. A smile matched the knowingness of her aura as she noticed Maki.

“Elicchi will be down in a bit.” Nozomi directed toward Nico despite her approaching Maki. “She’s a bit more tired than I am; wore her out a bit, it seems.”

Nico groaned and rolled her eyes.

“Tojo Nozomi.” The purple-haired girl greeted, holding out a hand. “A pleasure to meet you, Maki-chan.”

Maki blinked but accepted the handshake anyway.

“Don’t let her get to you, Nishikino.” Nico spoke up. “She’s like that with pretty much everyone.” She finally turned her attention away from her meal preparation. “You know you could try being a bit more formal at first from time to time, Nozomi.”

“Says the girl calling her Princess.” Nozomi grinned.

“Yeah, but that’s what her name…”

“Oh, is that ready? I’ll bring it out to the table.” She grabbed serving tray filled with carved meat.

“Thanks, but no sneaking a bi… hey! I saw that!”

The purple-haired girl laughed through a mouthful of meat as she made her escape to the dining room.

Nico sighed and shook her head. “Sometimes I wonder why I put up with her…”

“Because I’m your best source for rare components and you know it!” Nozomi called from the other room.

“Yeah, yeah…” Nico made a dismissive motion with her hand despite knowing the other girl couldn’t see it. “Anyway, Nishikino, if you would be so kind as to take this and follow Nozomi, we can eat soon.”

“Maki is fine.” Maki stated as she accepted the platter of crudités.

“Right, and I’ll overlook the kid thing if you call me Nico, the No. 1 Guildmaster in the Universe.”

The redhead couldn’t help deadpanning again.

“Or just Nico.” The raven-haired girl conceded with a smile.

As Maki made her way to the dining room, she found herself wondering if the No. 1 thing had been a joke or a test. Either way, she did feel a bit bad about misjudging the guildmaster’s age. She knew how she felt when being patronized by those older than her due to her age or lack of experience.

Although… had she actually misjudged Nico’s age? She had younger siblings, sure, and was the manager of this branch, but that didn’t mean she had to be any particular age, or even an adult for that matter. Maki was pretty sure she remembered reading the account of a girl who had taken command of a small mercenary guild when she was barely eleven. Not that it really mattered either way, but perhaps she should ask that Nozomi girl.

For better or worse, Maki was unable to inquire about Nico as the moment she made it to the table, a blonde shambled down the stairs, looking like she had just run a marathon. Said blonde introduced herself as Eli and took a seat next to Nozomi who immediately clamped a hand on her leg, earning a disparaging remark from Nico. Cocoro called her other two siblings and once everyone was at the table, they began their meal.

Conversation was lighthearted as full introductions were made and several stories were told. Nozomi insisted Eli tell the epic tale of her hunt earlier that day before sharing a story of her own, one seemingly designed specifically to embarrass Nico in front of the guest. The raven-haired girl fired back with what Maki assumed to be an embarrassing anecdote about Nozomi, but the purple-haired girl merely laughed it off.

All in all, the experience had been quite enjoyable for Maki and stood in stark contrast to the extravagant banquets and parties she had regularly been required to attend growing up. The food was surprisingly on par, simple in appearance, but flavorful and filling. And the company was in an entirely different realm. Nobody was approaching her with the intent of talking themselves up in hopes that she would put in a good word for them with her parents or some other noble. Nobody was sucking up to anyone, in fact. Everyone was just happily enjoying the company and were including her like they had known her for years. It was all a bit… strange, but pleasantly so.

And while she was not accustomed to doing so, Maki had been more than happy to join in clearing the table after the meal. The kids were out the door moments later, leaving the four older girls to relax for the evening.

“I’ll make some tea.” Nozomi offered before heading toward the kitchen.

“Thanks, Nozomi.” Nico replied before turning to Maki. “Now, about the bill.”

The bill? For the meal? “Oh, uhm… alright.” Maki began fumbling for her coin pouch.

“Nicocchi.” Nozomi’s tone held a scolding air despite her playful expression as she turned back toward them. “You know Eli and I provided everything for that meal, right?”

“But I cooked it.” Nico insisted. “My labor has to be worth something.”

“So, are you going to charge your siblings as well?”

“Of course not, they’re family.”

“Alright, then what of the leftovers?”

“What do you mean?”

“What if we were to take what Maki-chan ate out of what Elicchi and I will be taking with us?”

Nico opened her mouth to argue further but paused to think for a moment. “You know what, fine, we’ll just call it all even.” She turned back to Maki. “But standard room and board fees will apply if you want to stay here for the night and have breakfast in the morning.”

“Alright.” Maki pulled out a handful of gold coins from her pouch. “Will this cover it?”

Nico’s eyes bulged. “Ye…” Her voice cracked so she cleared her throat before continuing. “This much is fine.” She said, taking only one of the offered coins. “We can work out a weekly or monthly fee later if you end up sticking around a while. And of course if you join the guild, there is an even bigger discount, and I can deduct it directly from your pay.”

Maki nodded in agreement before the two made their way to the living room to join Eli.

“Tea is ready.” Nozomi announced a few minutes later, carrying a tray toward the fireplace.

“Almost done here.” Nico stated, stacking a few more logs. “Want to do the honors?” She offered, turning to the purple-haired girl.

“Of course.” The mage replied, and with a quick snap, a crackling fire leaped up from the wood. “So, Maki-chan,” she directed her attention toward the redhead “know any good songs?”

“Quite a few, actually.” Maki retrieved her lute. “Any requests?”

Nozomi shrugged. “Bard’s choice.”

“Alright.” Maki agreed and immediately began to play.

Nozomi took a seat next to Eli and leaned into the blonde who put her arm around her as they settled in to enjoy the show.

For her part, Nico sat back and let the stringed melody envelope her. Then the singing started. And for a moment, she wasn’t sure if her heart had merely skipped a beat or stopped altogether. Maki’s voice… it was heavenly. The redhead matched her tone flawlessly with her instrument, blending their harmonies in ways Nico had never imagined possible. And the song. She’d never heard it before, yet it felt so familiar that she found herself wanting to join in.

And then it was over. Nico suddenly remembered to breathe and leaned back into her chair without knowing when she had sat forward.

“Bravo!” Nozomi cheered, disturbing Eli from her trance similar to Nico’s. “Encore!”

Maki smiled at the request and obliged, filling the guildhouse again with music.

Nico had lost track of how many songs were sung but was happy Maki had gone with a few she knew and had let her sing along. Eli and Nozomi started drifting off to the later songs as though they were lullabies and Maki chose slower, softer songs to accommodate. Eventually, with some reluctance, Nico called an end to the concert, reminding Maki that the two of them had an early morning. However, as the other three girls shuffled upstairs, Nico instead headed to her office. The others would sleep, but she still had work to do.

Maki’s eyes opened slowly at what sounded like a knock on her door.

“Time to wake up!” Nico’s voice called from the hallway. “Your breakfast is already getting cold!”

Wearily, Maki sat up, stretched and yawned. With a deep breath through her nose, she inhaled another amazing aroma, a bit different from last night’s but enough to make her stomach grumble. Though part of her wanted to go back to sleep in the surprisingly comfortable, yet simple and small bed, the rest of her wanted more of the guildmaster’s delicious cooking. Thus, she crawled out of bed, wrapped her cape around her shoulders and shambled downstairs.

“Good morning!” Nico greeted her cheerfully, “Who knows when NozoEli will be down, but you and I have a few things to do before we head out.”

“Mmmph…” Was all Maki managed in response before collapsing into a chair at the table.

“Not a morning person, eh?” Nico chuckled. “Well if you’re gonna be an adventurer, we’re going to have to work on that.” She set a steaming cup in front of the redhead. “Here, I’ve found this stuff to be more effective than tea. Not sure where Nozomi gets the beans though.”

“Beans?” Maki lifted the mug to inspect the dark liquid within.

“Yeah, instead of leaves I guess. Strange, I know.” The raven-haired girl shrugged. “But it does the trick and helps me stay awake to concentrate on my duties.”

“Mmm…” Maki hummed after taking her first sip. The brew was definitely different than the tea to which she was accustomed, but not in a bad way. If it was truly more effective than tea, she figured she wouldn’t have a problem getting used to it.

“And here’s your breakfast.” A plate appeared in font of her as well. “I reused some stuff from last night, but the eggs are fresh.” Nico explained before taking a seat herself.

Breakfast proceeded mainly in silence, as Maki’s mind stumbled in getting through her morning fog. However, she did notice Nico seeming to pay particular attention to her with each bite she took, as if evaluating her reactions. Had she done that last night? Maki couldn’t remember. Perhaps the general hubbub of NozoE… Nozomi and Eli, she found it odd to refer to them together, and Nico’s siblings had distracted her?

In any case, Maki was familiar with the behavior as she had watched many chefs, as well as other servants, await the approval of the nobles they served. So, did that mean Nico wanted Maki’s approval?

“That was delicious.” Maki said after her final bite.

“I know, right?” A brilliant smile turned up the guildmaster’s lips. “Nico is the No. 1 Chef in the Universe after all.”

Maki raised an eyebrow. She wouldn’t have gone that far, but she would certainly admit that Nico’s skill exceeded those of at least some chefs she had encountered over the years. And what the heck was with the No. 1 thing? Didn’t she refer to herself as the No. 1 Guildmaster as well? Or did her sister say that? It didn’t matter, either way it quite the strange way to refer to oneself. And presumptuous. There was no way Nico had been able to meet and compare herself to every other guildmaster or chef in the realm, much less the universe.

However, as prideful as the proclamation had been, Maki couldn’t deny that seeing the other girl happy managed to make her happy as well. Nico was quite cute when smiling that brightly.

And on the topic of cuteness, gone were the girlish twintails of the prior night, replaced instead with low, twin buns that managed to increase her visual maturity without diminishing her cuteness. In fact, Nico’s entire outfit was more professional, yet no less adorable. She definitely looked more like a guildmaster today than when they had first met. And the pink pouch on her belt was a fitting highlight, if Maki were to assume the other girl’s color preference.

“So, you’re done?” Nico’s question brought Maki back to reality.

“Uhm, yeah…”

“Very well,” Nico stood and collected the plates “Let me bring these back to the kitchen. Wait here and I’ll get your contract and supplies. Feel free to top off your mug if you want.” She motioned to the carafe of the curious concoction.

Maki was more than happy to partake as she realized she was indeed waking up faster than normal. She sipped at her fresh cup while awaiting Nico’s return.

“Here we go; your Standard Issue Beginner Adventurer’s Pack.” A backpack was set on the table. “And, here is an itemized receipt of everything in it.” Nico held a slip of paper out for Maki to take. “If you feel you don’t need a particular item, or already have one, return it now for a full refund. However, once you leave here, it will be considered used and you’ll only get half price.”

“Half?”

“Standard operating procedure.” Nico explained. “You’ll find the other shopkeeps will all offer the same.”

“Hrm…” Maki began to study the list. “Torches?”

“We’ll be going into a cave, can you see in the dark?”

“No…”

“Do you know any spells the cast light?”

“I don’t think so.”

“Then you’ll need a light source. Otherwise you are likely to be eaten by a grue.”

“Eaten? Grue?” Maki blanched. “What the heck?”

“Kidding. Kidding.” Nico laughed. “There have been no reports of grue attacks in this area for at least a few weeks. But do be wary of the occasional gazebo.”

“I don’t get it.”

“Anyway, all adventurers need light eventually, so I include torches in the standard pack. However, due to your apparent finances, I would personally recommend an Everburning Torch. You’ll never need to replace it, unless you lose it, of course. Which reminds me,” She produced another slip “here are a few other upgrades I would recommend.”

“Rope? Why would I need rope?” Maki was still looking at the original list.

Nico sighed. “I could literally spend all day explaining the various uses for rope. Suffice to say every adventurer needs it at some point.”

“What’s a crowbar?”

Nico balked a bit before opening the backpack and retrieving said item. “You can use it to pry things open; doors, chests, and whatnot.” She made a couple motions to demonstrate. “Technically you can use it as a weapon in a pinch, but I’d recommend you use the daggers in here instead.”

“Daggers?”

“Everyone needs a backup weapon or two. We’ll get to your primary weapon in a moment.”

“Alright… Oh, I already have a mirror, soap and these as well.”

“Of course you do.” Nico reached into the backpack to remove the named items.

“What’s a handy haversack?”

Nico’s eyes lit up. “Only one of the best utility items an adventurer can have!”

“It’s a backpack…”

“Not just any backpack! It’s bigger on the inside!”

Maki raised an eyebrow.

“Magic. Extra-dimensional space and all that. In any case, it can hold far more than a regular backpack. And it will magically sort your inventory so whatever you’re looking for will always appear on top for easy retrieval. Keep that lute of yours safe and sound but retrieve it with ease. Feet sore from lugging around a hundred pounds of stuff? The haversack only weighs five, even with everything in it.”

“Alright, I’ll try one.”

“Excellent.” Nico grinned. “I’ll be right back.” She turned and took two steps but paused. “Actually, follow me and bring that pack. We’ll get you a weapon while we’re at it.”

Maki did as instructed and followed the guildmaster into a room full of supplies.

“You’re in luck. This is my last one.” Nico said, taking a backpack off a hook on the wall. “A bargain at twice the price.” She set it down on a counter. “Go ahead and start moving stuff while we talk weapons.”

Maki nodded.

“I noticed you didn’t appear to have a weapon of your own when you arrived, so I’m assuming you stuck to main roads on your way here.” Nico move to a display rack. “But you never know what you’re going to encounter out there in the wild, so you best be prepared. Do you prefer ranged or melee?”

“I’m not sure…?”

“Have you had any archery practice?”

Maki shook her head.

“Melee it is. Now, anyone can swing a blunt object around and cause some damage, but have you had any training with a blade?”

“I had some fencing lessons growing up.”

“Ah, then perhaps you’d be interested in a rapier.” Nico selected a blade and moved over to the other girl.

“Yes, that looks familiar.” Maki nodded, accepting the sword. “It’s quite lovely.”

“I know, right?” The guildmaster puffed out her chest with pride. “Nico is the No 1 Blacksmith in the Universe.”

There it was again. By the gods this girl had one hell of an ego. But while it was starting to get on Maki’s nerves, she couldn’t deny the rapier she now held was indeed of masterwork quality.

“Also, here is you contract for this adventure.” Nico produced a sizable scroll. “Here is your base pay, and a statement about the commission you will earn based on the price of the artifact you retrieve. Please initial here to acknowledge it.” Her finger moved about the page to point things out. “And here we have a section about revival. Check Yes if you wish to be revived upon death, but be aware that the price of materials for the spell as well as all expenses incurred in locating and retrieving your body will be deducted from your pay. Or check No if you do not desire this service. Then initial here to acknowledge your decision.”

“You’re kidding again, right?”

“Not in the slightest. This is just standard contract stuff. But don’t worry too much about it. Where we’re going, even an amateur like you should be fine.”

“Hrm…”

“Anyway, if you check Yes, you will be charged a nominal deposit for the tracking device, which will be refunded upon its return in good and working order. Additional fees may apply for damage to or loss of the device.”

“Tracking device?”

“Something of my own creation.” Nico said, retrieving a small, metallic object from a nearby shelf. “Once it’s registered to you, it will monitor your vitals. If it detects that vitals have ceased, it will start transmitting a signal I can use to locate and revive you.”

“But you’re coming with me right?’

“I am.”

“So, why would I need this?”

“You never know what might happen out there. Maybe we get separated.” Nico explained. “Also, once you’ve registered a device, you can just keep it with you for however long you’re in the area. Heck, NozoEli still have theirs even though it’s been over a year since they last contracted with me.”

“Have either of them needed to use it?”

“That’s privileged information. But while I won’t reveal which clients have made use of this service, I will say that some have. Better safe than sorry.”

Maki thought for a moment before reaching over, checking Yes and initialing next to it.

“Excellent decision.” Nico said with a grin before doing something with the device in her hand. “Alright, place your finger here until it flashes.”

Maki did as asked.

“Perfect. Now just keep this in a pouch or pocket or whatever.” Nico explained handing over the tracker. “Just not in the haversack. I haven’t figured out how to make its sensors work through the extra-dimensional space yet. But I am still working on it. Anyway, please initial here, here and here as well. Then sign all the way down at the bottom.”

“Nico-chan!” a voice called from the entryway.

“Coming!” Nico raised her voice in response. “Finish up with this.” She instructed Maki. “And double check those lists to make sure you have everything you need. We’ll be back by dinner, so you won’t need stuff for overnight, but you’ll still want to be prepared. And of course let me know if you see anything else you want.”

“Alright.” Maki nodded.

And with that, Nico headed to the front door.

“Kotori!” Nico greeted her guest warmly. “It’s been a while. And I know that look. What kind of creature did you bring this time?”

Kotori smiled apologetically and lead the way back outside.

Nico immediately facepalmed. “A lion? Really? Where did you even find…” She glanced up to see the other girl’s eyes brimming with tears. “Fine.” She conceded, despite knowing it was an act. “But carnivores are going to cost extra.”

“Thanks Nico-chan!” The ash-haired girl practically jumped with joy.

“Yeah, yeah.” Nico dismissed. “Maybe you can convince Eli to hunt down some food so I don’t have to buy it.”

“Hunt down what now?” A voice came from behind them.

“Ah, Eli-chan!” Kotori’s attention was drawn to the blonde descending the stairs. “Just who I wanted to see!”

“What’s up, Kotori?” Eli smiled in greeting.

“I received word that a Corrupted boar was recently terrorizing the town of Arcton.” The ash-haired girl explained. “I tracked it to this area and believe it’s heading toward Lerwick.”

“Arcton is fairly well guarded, I can see why it would have moved on.” Eli grimaced. “But Lerwick... If it’s Corrupted enough, it could wipe them out.”

Kotori nodded somberly. “And from the reports, it may be beyond the point where I can save it.”

“Alright, I’ll get my gear and be ready in a bit.” Eli turned halfway to go back upstairs. “Say, do you mind if Nozomi joins us?”

“Of course not. You know I always welcome her company. And her magic might prove useful.”

“I figured you two would be leaving today.” Nico spoke up. “There are bentos in the kitchen for you. Take what you want, and I’ll add them to your bill.”

“Thanks Nico.” Eli tossed over her shoulder.

“I made plenty if you want to buy a few.” Nico offered to Kotori.

“Wonderful.” The other girl clapped her hands together with a smile. “I most certainly will partake.”

“Everything is signed.” Maki said, coming outside. “W-wait, wha?” She stumbled in retreating and found herself leaning awkwardly against the doorframe.

Kotori giggled. “Oh, he won’t bite.” She stroked the mane of the lion laying beside her.

“You’re not going to react that way the first time you encounter a wolf or whatnot, are you, Maki?” Nico asked, taking the paperwork from the redhead.

“Maki?” Kotori tilted her head. “Nishikino Maki?”

Maki blinked. “Uhm… yes…”

“You know her, Kotori?” Nico asked what was on both her and Maki’s minds.

“She’s a friend of Umi-chan.”

“Umi?”

Kotori giggled. “We should work on your knowledge of nobility and royalty, Nico-chan.”

“Hmph.” Nico scoffed. “As if I care about those high class muckety mucks.”

Maki wasn’t sure if she should interject, but she often felt similar, despite, or perhaps because of the fact that she had been raised in said high society. Instead she asked, “Sonoda Umi?”

“That’s right.” Kotori confirmed. “We’ve been friends since childhood, but I haven’t seen her in a few years, unfortunately. Not since…” She trailed off and she diverted her gaze down. “Never mind.” She cleared her throat and looked back up, her smile seeming a bit off. “I wouldn’t’ve expected to find you here, Maki-chan.”

“I’m, uhm… trying my hand as an adventuring bard.” Maki decided to explain.

“I see. That sounds wonderful.” Kotori’s smile softened and become more genuine. “Let me know if you ever want a beastmaster in your party.”

“I will.” Maki agreed.

“Oh yeah, Maki,” Nico spoke up, “change of plans.”

“Hm?”

“Looks like you’ll be going alone today. I have a new pen to build.”

“But…”

“You’ll be fine.” The guildmaster assured. “It’s a simple fetch quest. You’ll be back before dinner. And on the plus side, you’ll earn more because you won’t be charged for my assistance.”

“…” The bard seemed hesitant to agree for a moment before relenting. “Alright.”

Over the next half hour, the girls finished preparing for the day. Eli and Nozomi followed Kotori’s lead to hunt down the boar. Maki began following her map to find the hidden idol. And Nico began gathering materials to build a pen for Kotori’s new beast.

Maki squinted at the map in her hands. After some scrutiny, she looked up at the cliffside. This was the place, right? It had to be. She traced the landmark on the map with her finger as though the action would somehow make things clearer. Well, in any case, if this was indeed the right place, there would have to be a cave entrance somewhere at the base of the cliff.

Still rechecking the map, she took a step forward and…

“Kyaaa!” She shrieked as her boot clipped an exposed root and she stumbled down to her knees. “Ow ow ow oooowww~!” She cried, rolling back into a sitting position.

That was stupid. She chastised herself, inspecting the scrape marks on both knees that were just starting to bleed. Hissing, she quickly brushed away some of the larger chunks of debris. Then, holding a hand over each knee, she began to sing.

A soft red glow appeared between hand and wound and after a few seconds, both were mended. However, despite having fully healed her injury, Maki did not stop singing, mostly because the song was not over. As the melody continued, she fetched a handkerchief and waterskin from her bag. Then, after dampening the cloth, she cleared away the last of the dirt. Finally, she stood back up.

“Ssssing…” A voice like leaves in the wind rasped from behind her.

Startled, Maki spun to face whoever had spoken. “Who…?” She asked, not seeing anybody. “Where…?”

“Ssssing…” The voice repeated.

Up. Maki looked toward the branches above her to see a woman, body half covered in feathers, perched in a nearby tree.

“Who are you?” Maki inquired.

With a flap of wings, the woman descended to hover in front of the redhead. Maki froze as she noticed the bow nocked with a wickedly tipped arrow pointing at her. She doubted she could draw her rapier and close the distance before being hit with one, possibly two arrows.

“Sing!” The bird woman demanded, drawing the bow.

“A-alright…” Maki held out both hands defensively, revealing them to be empty. “I’ll sing…”

And with that, Maki began a new song. One that was different than her healing song, one she hoped would calm and placate.

Sure enough, halfway through the first chorus, the feathered woman lowered her bow. By the second, she had moved to a nearby rock to perch.

“Another.” The winged woman stated as soon as Maki finished.

“Uhm… do you mind if I fetch my instrument from my bag?” Maki inquired.

The bird woman cocked her head to the side with curiosity, but Maki noticed her grip tightening on her bow.

“It’s just a lute.” Maki explained, slowly removing her bag from her shoulders and setting it on the ground in front of her anything she did would be in clear view. “It will make my songs even better.” She assured. Then, careful to avoid sudden movements, she found her lute and pulled just the end out to show that it was not a weapon. Once the bird woman seemed satisfied with the lack of threat from the instrument, she removed it completely and slid its strap over her shoulder.

Maki plucked a few strings to reassure herself the lute was still in tune before strumming a full chord. Satisfied with the results, she began a second song. She watched the feathered woman’s features relax as the melodies washed over her. And while she did not release her bow completely, Maki was pleased to see her grip loosen.

“Another.” The bird woman stated again as the second song concluded.

Maki nodded and started her third song. This time, however, the feathered woman straightened her posture, opened her mouth, and began to sing along. Though initially startled, Maki did not let the unexpected accompaniment detract from her performance. And after a few moments, she allowed herself to be in awe as an almost perfect countermelody was provided to her song. Maki doubted the bird woman knew the song, as it was one she had written herself and had never performed for any non-human individuals; at least not knowingly. This meant the bird woman’s musical intuition was on par, if not exceed her own.

A fourth song. A fifth. A sixth.

Maki honestly felt like she could continue for hours.

A seventh song. An eighth. A ninth.

Maki began to lose count but didn’t care.

And then the feathered woman stood. As though coming out of a trance, Maki slowly focused on her vocal partner of the last… however long it had been.

“Thank you.” The bird woman said with a slight bow. “That was…” She seemed hesitant for a moment “fun” she concluded.

“Yes, it was.” Maki agreed with a smile.

With one more nod of acknowledgment, the woman flapped her wings and took to the trees. Within seconds, she was gone.

Strange. But enjoyable. Maki found herself thinking before continuing her search for the cave.

Nico wiped the sweat off her brow and glared up at the accursed yellow thing above her. In all honesty, it wasn’t a particularly warm day, but there wasn’t a cloud in the sky to block the sun’s rays, nor even a whisper of wind to help cool things off. For a moment she found herself envious of her friends and potential new recruit who were all trekking through shaded forest at this time.

Yellow movement caught the corner of her eye and she turned her gaze toward the lion sleeping nearby. The beast had rolled onto its back and pawed a few times at the air. Nico scoffed. Even the large cat was enjoying the shade of the tree to which it was tethered while she toiled away building its new pen.

Perhaps that should be her next creation; a portable shade device, or perhaps an automated fan. Or maybe even a combination there of? Nico made a mental note to draw up some designs later as she fed another log through her custom milling device.

This was the idol, right? Maki studied the sketch in her hands. It had to be. She held up the parchment near the small statue for a better comparison. Maybe if you ignored this part and added that… She turned the page sideways. Close enough. She grabbed the idol and shoved it in one of the pouches on her belt.

Nico had been mostly right, at least insofar as the ease of locating the idol. Travel to the cave had taken a bit longer, and the monsters had been a bit tougher than indicated, but Maki had made it through. She felt a swell of pride as she made her way back toward the entrance; she had completed her first adventure. On her own. Without any help.

Well, mostly complete. She did still have to make it back to the guildhouse, but that should be easy, right? She flipped the map upside down and headed out of the cave.

Where the heck was Maki? She should have been back by now. Nico checked the distress tracker again. At least the new adventurer was still alive, so that was good. But what was taking her so long?

Did she get lost? No, that couldn’t be the case. Even her younger siblings could figure out how to get to that cave and retrieve the idol within.

Maybe Maki was so much of a beginner that just the hike to the cave wore her out and she was taking extended breaks? Nico tried to remember if the redhead had purchased proper sleeping gear in case she needed to camp out for the night. And rations. Had she brought enough food for an extra day?

Well, whatever the case, her siblings would be arriving for dinner at any moment, so she took one last taste from the pot to make sure it was ready before moving to the dining room to set the table.

A knock on the door made Nico look up from her desk.

“It’s open!” She called.

“I’m back.” Maki’s voice came from the entryway.

About time. Nico thought. “I’m in the office.”

A moment later, the redhead came in the room and immediately stopped to stare at Nico.

“What?” Nico questioned as Maki slowly walked toward her with a strange expression.

“Nico-chan!” Maki threw herself on the guildmaster, knocking her out of her chair.

Nico grunted as she landed on the floor and arms wrapped tightly around her.

Nico-chan? What the heck is going on? Nico’s mind raced through ideas attempting to discern the most likely possibility. However, her thoughts were completely derailed when the redhead nuzzled against her cheek.

“What are you doing?” Nico cried. “Hey, let go of me.” She started to attempt to remove herself from the embrace.

“Noo~~!” Maki whined, hugging tighter.

“Maki, seriously, what are you doing?”

The redhead pulled away just enough to make eye contact. Nico internally cursed her heart for skipping a beat at the sheer adorableness of Maki’s pout.

“Does Nico-chan hate me?” Moisture gathered at the edges of the bard’s eyes.

“No, I just…” The guildmaster struggled to put her words together. “I just want to know what’s going on and why you’re hugging me.”

“I’m hugging Nico-chan because I love Nico-chan.”

“L-love?!”

“Yup!” Maki began snuggling against her again. “I lo~ve Nico-chan so~ much!” She practically sang.

“But, I…” Nico’s head lulled. Wait, what the heck? No. She wasn’t tired. She still had work to do!

“Nico-chan…” Maki sighed with contentment.

Maki was pretty warm… And despite its unexpected nature, her embrace was… pretty comf… No! She wasn’t… ti… No… She refused to… fall…

Nico opened her eyes. Had she fallen asleep? Damn! What time was it? Her mind ticked off all of her remaining duties of the day. Gods, she would be so far behind now. She attempted to sit up, only to find she was being hindered by an arm across her stomach. What the hell?!

The movement caused the arm’s owner to stir and murmur something quietly that sounded not too dissimilar to Nico’s name. She glanced over and immediately recognized tangles of red hair on a head currently trying to close the distance she had just created between them. Why was Maki in her bed with her? And why, by all that was holy, was she so adorable?

“Ah, you’re awake.” The door opened and a purple-haired girl stepped in.

“Nozomi?”

“Good morning.”

“Morning?”

“Afternoon, actually.”

Nico’s eyes widened and she tensed up until a gentle hand landed on her shoulder.

“You slept through the night, and most of the day.” Nozomi smiled at her friend. “But don’t worry. Everything is fine. You obviously needed it. And we all pitched in to take care of things; Elicchi, Kotori-chan, your sisters, even little Cotaro-kun helped a bit.”

Nico stared the other girl for a moment while she processed the information. “How did I get here?” She finally asked. She was pretty sure that when she had collapsed, she had been downstairs.

“Maki-chan insisted on carrying you.”

Maki-chan carried…? “Did she also change my clothes?”

“No, I did that.” Nozomi chuckled at the memory. “Despite her protests.”

“What the heck is going on with her?”

“I think she was cursed by the idol you sent her to retrieve.”

“That can’t be right.” Nico furrowed her brow. “That thing is harmless, certainly not cursed. It’s the same one I’ve used for all beginner adventurers; just keep putting it back for them.”

Nozomi produced a small statue and held it out to the other girl.

“That’s… not the right idol. Where she get that?”

“I’ve no idea.” Nozomi admitted. “You’re the idol expert.”

“Yeah, and I’ve never even seen that in any of my books…”

“Well the only thing I’ve been able to determine is that the curse only seems to be able to affect one person at a time, thus why I’m able to safely hold it.”

“That or the curse is contingent on who actually removes it from its dungeon.” Nico suggested.

“Either way, it certainly seems to bring out some… interesting behavior from your cute new recruit.”

Nico glared at the other girl. “I haven’t recruited her… yet.”

“Oh c’mon, Nicocchi, you and I both know she’s your type.” Nozomi said with a laugh. “Don’t think I didn’t notice you checking her out at dinner the other night. I’ve a feeling you’re enjoying this more than you want to admit, even to yourself.”

Nico sighed and gave another glance toward the still sleeping Maki. Before remembering who was watching, she brushed a stray strand of red out of the girl’s face.

“It would be cuter if the curse didn’t make her so clingy…” Nico decided to try for a balance between conceding Nozomi’s point while retaining some of her initial cantankerousness. The situation did still bother her after all.

“Perhaps.” Nozomi seemed willing to let that stand. “Anyway, I sent word to RinPana, so they’ll be dropping by any day now. I figure Hanayo-chan is the best choice to help you figure out how to ameliorate the curse.” She turned to leave. “Oh, and lunch is ready when you two decide to get out of bed.” She paused and looked over her shoulder with a mischievous grin. “But don’t take too long…” She laughed and easily dodged the pillow Nico threw at her.

Once the purple-haired menace had departed, Nico turned her attention to the sleeping redhead still snuggled against her. While part of her wanted to hop out of bed and get back to her duties, she couldn’t deny that another part wanted to stay where she was. Perhaps… just maybe, a few more minutes wouldn’t hurt… While staring at the ceiling, Nico’s mind started wandering through thoughts on how to handle a cursed Maki.

Author’s Notes continued in Followup Post

[firesign23]

since it’s boxing day with the in-laws, here are four to answer at your leisure: 4, 11, 26, 30.

How do you know when a chapter is “done”?

When I lose my will to live, mostly. It’s a lot of gut instinct, and quite often an impending sense of boredom (because it means I’ve either teased out what I want to tease out OR I’m not able to tease it out successfully) But there are a couple of elements that go into my gut instinct–I’ve found that, for me, chapters work best somewhere in the 3K range, so as I approach that point I know no more developments are likely to appear. I usually have 3-5 small developments I want to occur in a chapter, even if I don’t know what they are until I get there–they can be plot details, emotional revelations, etc. Using the chapter of yonder I posted the other day (and yonder is unusual in that my brain insists on three scenes per chapter and at least one POV shift), my original view of the chapter had way more plot going on–there were three big plot events, which gave no room for small details or emotional beats. For my style of writing, that starts to crowd the chapter. 

What punctuation do you love too much?

Look, if I could marry em-dashes and semicolons, I absolutely fucking would. I often forget that other people don’t like them? A friend literally gave me a semicolon sticker once and I love that thing. But, like, they’re so useful? They wrap sentences around you like tendrils and pull you closer. Or something.

How do you go about world building?

HAHAHA, yeah, I don’t. I really, really don’t. I basically go “What bare minimum do I need for this story to work?” and then work my ass off when my lack of detailed planning comes to bite me in said ass. One of my great fandom-related skills is being able to propose solutions to shitty world-building, and I use it on my own fics a lot. It’s one of the reasons the Persuasion AU is terrifying me–there are a couple of events that will massively change canon, and the bare minimum I need just keeps sprawling. Sansa is marrying Joffrey? Ned dies a different way. What are the political consequences or this? What are the personal consequences of this? Do I have to rewatch season 1, the only season I actually watched to begin with, to accurately bullshit? (I refuse on principle, so…) Most of my world-building is tissue-thin if you examine it too closely. But not Harry Potter levels of thin, so…

That said, I do a lot of background building of other elements, things that are never intended to make it to page but influence the events and characters. Which is, I suppose, a form of world-building, just a more internal one. 

How do you edit your stories?

I edit a lot. I admire people who can just write and edit later, but it does not work for me. I edit as I write, because if it’s not approximately right I will go down the wrong path and be unable to fix it later as the entire structure becomes unstable--I once had a really pivotal scene in a fic where I had multiple people say that I needed to do X (moving part of a conversation towards the end of the sceme), and I agreed with them, but the converation built in such a way that X was impossible. So it didn’t happen.  Then I edit a scene when it’s done, edit from the beginning of a chapter every time I start writing (because the rereading gets me into the flow), send incoherent messages to people screaming “DOES THIS WORK??? IS IT SALTY CAKE??? NO, I KNOW IT IS SALTY CAKE, I JUST NEED SOMEONE TO TELL ME!!!” and so on until I have a chapter. Once I have a chapter I give it one editing sweep, send it to another reader if I’m using one, take their feedback into consideration, do at least two more editing sweeps, realise I am bored to death, and decide that it’s as good as it is ever going to get, and move on (post or start the next chapter, depending on whether I’m posting a WIP or not).

Hoenstly, the more interesting element of my editing is that I almost never do major changes once it’s on page. I tweak and tweak, but the actual events won’t change, to the complete exasperation of anyone who has ever betaed for me.

| Author Asks  |

[honeyandfiregame]

While I was away, I wrote something I thought I'd share. I have no motivations for why I wrote this or even really what inspired me, I guess I was just thinking about hot older guys and that lead to thinking about Day when he's older.

Don't take this as rooted in canon, btw, if you don't want to. As in, the circumstances in this short are not definitely what'll happen in the future if you romance Day. Whatever happens after the credits roll is up to you.

(Under the cut, hopefully, for length. 1.7k. Also I didn't edit this at all. It's not even good or anything)

The breeze that hits your skin is a welcome chill against the warm air surrounding you with the pleasant scent of spring. The ground is hard beneath you and you shift a little, trying to dispel the stiffness of your legs.

"...Best get on, then." The voice is quiet, subdued with a heaviness you know too well. You offer a sad smile in return, but say no more. Normal life can't wait forever.

Your companion rises to his feet. There's not much struggle in his movements, but he can't help but let out a grunt with the effort. Your smile turns fond at the sound, a chuckle escaping you before you can reign it in.

"That was an old man sound, if I ever heard one," you tease, climbing to your feet with much more ease. "Careful. You're not so young and spry anymore."

Day groans. "Stop. You're gonna make me kill myself."

You laugh to yourself. But it's true. How old is he now? Fifties? It's been a couple decades and while you still retain the look of a young adult, albeit at the very beginning of shifting into an adult, Day has... aged, like anyone would.

He's still fit, still dangerous as he always was, but now small lines have carved age into his once youthful skin, and his rich black hair, currently styled away from his face, is tainted by a streak of grey.

You'd be lying if you said he hasn't aged well, though. He is, to this day, one of the most handsome men you ever met and you think only part of that is exaggerated by your love for him. His lips can still curve into that stomach-fluttering smirk, his carmine eyes still hold the steel they always did. Silver fox doesn't begin to cover it.

You pause as he holds a hand out to you, poised to take yours. You cock your head and accept, noting the way his fingers gently close around yours to keep his black claws from catching against your skin. The silver band on his left ring finger glints in the sunlight, a perfect match to the ring on your own hand.

"You sure? We're about to enter town. People are gonna think you're, like... my guardian." You almost chuckle at a memory. "Or worse, that you're rich and I'm desperate."

Day isn't nearly as amused, a hum of indignation rumbling in his chest. "So?" He glances at you out of the corner of his eye, emotions cautiously guarded. "Am I someone you've ever known to care what other people think?"

Your bright smile returns at that. "I suppose that's true. You're one of a kind, Daiya."

He doesn't reply verbally, instead lifting your interlocked hands to his mouth to place a kiss on the back of yours.

Silence falls over you two comfortably for a while, the only sound the crunching of loose gravel beneath your shoes. It's nice, but your mind is wandering several places over. The years have moved on and things have changed, both you and your husband have changed, everything around you has changed...

"Maybe we should get a puppy."

Day nearly stumbles at the words you didn't even realize you were going to speak until they were already out of your mouth. He takes a breath, opening his mouth like he's about to say something but then changes his mind.

His paused footsteps resume, more tension held in his posture than before.

"Very funny," he growls. The way his claws nearly scratch you as his grip tightens suggests he thinks otherwise.

You frown, jogging to catch up to those long legs and their sudden increased pace.

"I'm not trying to be funny this time!" you shoot back, defensive both because you didn't mean it like that and you really don't want him getting moody right now.

You dig your heels into the ground, tugging on his arm to get him to stop. Surprisingly, it works. He doesn't just drag you along like he might if he were really annoyed. Instead he lets out a huff, but swings around to face you. In doing so, however, his hand releases its grip and he defensively folds his arms in front of his chest.

Trying to ignore the cold emptiness you feel in your palm, you sigh. "Day... I'm being serious."

You glance around, thankful to see the road devoid of life other than you two.

"It's been years, you know? Skoll and Hati passed on ages ago and now..." You wave your hands for emphasis. "We just got back from the funeral of your best friend."

"He wasn't my best friend," Day interrupts, smoothly arching an eyebrow.

"Yes, he was," you calmly reply, keeping your voice gentle. You're pleased when he doesn't rebutt you again. Because you both know it's true.

He shakes his head and looks away. A refusal to meet your eyes and a guarded tone, but the tension has eased a bit from his shoulders. "The only shocking part about it all is how long Zenos lasted before he was finally stupid enough to get himself killed. Besides, this and that are two different things. I don't need a dog; I have you."

A small smile tugs at your lips at the sentiment, but you push it back. "Having a dog has always helped you."

He actually meets your eyes again, though you almost wish he hadn't. "What, all my friends are dead and now you think I need a little companion animal to feel okay again? As I said, two different things."

His voice is sharp, that part about him hasn't changed a bit. But you've been together long enough, you don't even flinch away from his glare. You also don't point out he just called them his friends because you're afraid he'd take it back.

"Not all of them," you remind him gently. He sighs.

"I don't speak to Effie or Niina anymore."

"But I do. They know how you're like. They still care about you."

"I didn't ask them to. And I didn't ask you to try and replace my dogs."

Punctuated with an air of finality, Day turns and begins heading down the road. You rush to catch up, halting him again with a hand around his arm. A growl rumbles in his chest, but he doesn't turn his anger on you, he just faces you again with a silence to let you say your piece.

"No one was suggesting replacing your dogs, Day." You clasp your hands together, hoping he can see the sincerity in your eyes. "I'm sorry it came across like that. I just meant..."

"A dog would help me?" Day interrupts before you can gather your thoughts. He rolls his eyes. "Love, I'm fine. For Hells' sake, I'm 53. I'm a grown man. I can handle a little death."

There's a lot to unpack there, particularly the fact that it took him all of two seconds to revert back to that old 'I'm a grown man' excuse. However, you decide you'll save that for later.

"Day..." you start gently, calmness layered over your voice. Almost disturbingly calm, as you reach up to cup his face and guide him closer to you. "Let me speak."

The fight immediately drops from his stance as his shoulders do the same, his mouth shutting so fast you hear his teeth click together. You can almost feel him trying not to roll his eyes again as he straightens himself up.

"Fine." There's no attitude, just a soft resignation.

Though him straightening his posture pulled his face out of reach, your hand stays on him, sliding from his neck to his shoulder. You soothingly rub your thumb in circles as you speak.

"It was just a simple suggestion in the face of a lot of loss lately. Daiya, you have trauma and I meant it when I said your dogs helped you. A new dog can be trained to do the same; when I'm not there with you." You lift your gaze, meaningfully catching his. It's an admittance that's hard to swallow, especially for him. Care for mental health, you've come to know, is not easy to find in the world. Zenos has- had barely been able to find information about what might be wrong with Day, or even you. But it's getting better. Slowly.

You kind of wonder if maybe you'll see the world change for the better eventually. Even if Day won't get to.

You shake the thought from your head, refocusing on your current statement. "But that's not the only reason. I'm not implying you can't handle all this. I'm just saying... I mean..."

You throw your hands out, finding one last tactic in what you admit might be grasping at straws. "I like dogs," you say. "I get lonely sometimes and it gets boring at home without another living creature, or two, to play with."

"It doesn't have to be boring." Day finally breaks his own silence with the suggestive statement. He uses those boyish dimples for evil, a wolfish grin tugging at his lips to reveal semi-feral teeth that look like they're ready to take a bite of you any second.

"Don't change the subject," you snap, sternly holding up a finger. Even if you don't feel all that stern. Because you don't. An excited heat creeps up your neck from your belly at the suggestion behind those words.

Damnit, he did this when he was younger, too.

Day lets out a sigh, swaying back a step and once again holding out a hand for you.

"If you want a dog, we can talk about it more when we get home," he finally gives in. You bite back a victorious grin and slide your hand into his.

Keeping close to his side as you walk, you smile up at him. "You know I love you, right?" Of course he does, but you ask anyway.

He's silent for a moment then gruffly replies, avoiding your gaze, "Yes... I love you too."

Before you can continue that line of conversation and see how embarrassed you can get him, Day suddenly gives a groan.

"We should've taken a damn horse," he growls, one hand pressed against the small of his back.

You smirk. "Old man."

"Hey!" he barks, baring his wicked teeth.

That pleasant walk home quickly turns into a chase, your laughter filling the warm spring air as you go.

[slothcritic]

Dragon Ball Z Abridged - Episode 5 Review

Weird yet creative cutaways with strong overarching momentum.

Vegeta: Kills Bugs Dead opens with Goku finally reaching the end of Snake Way and the end of his journey to reach King Kai. The "nice job, jackass" as Goku literally craters into the planet sets the tone for this character in a big way. We're also treated to the incredible hijinks of Vegeta and Nappa.

[Title Sequence]

The pit-stop at Arlia at least receives a well-fitted and rather hilarious incarnation in this series. Even though the episode alternates its focus between King Kai and Arlia, I'm going to talk at length about Arlia first, and then move onto the King Kai segments.

I'm already going into this scene with some personal bias, as the "stronger guy playing along with the weaker guy because it'd be funny" trope is one of my favorites. And here we have exactly this. Vegeta and Nappa allow themselves to be captured and thrown in jail by the Arlians, where they meet an assortment of varied bug characters.

"Don't drop the soap" seems a little outdated for the modern style of TFS, as I feel they've leaned away from really older, cruder, less PC subject matters like calling someone retarded or insinuating prison rape, etc, but it fits Nappa's character completely as someone who is childish, crass, annoying for the sake of being annoying, and kind of a jerk. TFS has at least acknowledged the idea of possibly re-dubbing Season 1 with better equipment and perhaps a more refined script, and I dearly hope they keep this line unedited simply for the sake of nailing Nappa’s character identity.

After very nearly becoming a prison bitch, Vegeta decides he's had enough and promptly kabooms his way out of prison, landing smack-dab in the middle of a coliseum with the king of Arlia and his queen.

Nappa's blunt manner of introducing himself with simply "Hi." will never age.

It’s noteworthy that scene is also the first moment we get a good look at Vegeta as a character. Nappa was firmly established as the goofball from the start, but Vegeta's portrayal has more depth to it than could be conveyed in one-liners. Most of which is just sass, smug pride, and anger, but still.

It's also made clear very quickly that despite their bantering idiocy and gruff talk that they're not just for show, as Nappa no-diff's the thirteen elite Arlian guards with a massive shock wave that we later see level a city.

The king and queen are then more or less blackmailed into fucking. Nappa's eager fascination during this whole scene, the descriptions, visual edits and sound design are... Well, there's no other way to put it, it's fucked up. And it is hilarious! These are some very creative takes and decisions that were made entirely for internal experience of the show itself rather than as a parody of something else. Nappa even takes a photograph of it and sends it to Vegeta, since he's abstained from watching.

The comedic jabs don't stop there either, as Nappa tries to adopt the Arlian Rancor, but just like the kid who can't sit still, Nappa ends up breaking everything he plays with. Just as Vegeta is about to kill the king, rocks begin flying around the coliseum.

"What are you doing?"

Vegeta smirks. "I'm about to rock you, like a hurricane." And then boom, he hurls a rock into the king and kills him. Let's put a pin in that brick joke for later.

The long flashback scene doesn't play any music, which feels like a weird editing misstep after a series of home runs. They leave the planet as heroes, and Nappa sets Vegeta up for another predictable bit of mood whiplash, where Vegeta obliterates the entire planet. This is a huge escalation in power scale compared to everything else we have seen thus far. But then, this is Dragon Ball Z. We've already reached “destroying planets” at only the fifth episode, and everyone knows that it only goes well past 11 on the dial from here on out.

Granted, there is controversy in the official version about whether or not this would’ve been possible for Saiyan Saga Vegeta, considering Arlia is not canon, but I will not be considering that simply because DBZA contains no filler. Everything shown in the flagship series (not counting movies, DBZA Kai, or other shorts) is presented as being canon to DBZA. Also, Vegeta and Nappa are shown standing outside of their pods... in the vacuum of space. Series veterans will understand the massive can of worms this opens. I'm looking at you, Battle of Gods.

Once everyone, including the people that they JUST SAVED from a tyrannical king, have been reduced to space dust, Nappa closes off this scene nicely.

Now that we've discussed Arlia, let's focus on King Kai's role in the episode.

He explains to Goku that the planet has high gravity due to it's small size. Gregory from off-screen pipes up that this doesn't make any sense. I suppose "higher planet density" wasn't considered when writing the script - or perhaps it was, and they just decided that the easy answer wasn't the funniest one. Maybe “there’s an incredibly powerful pirate trapped in the core of the planet, which is why the gravity is so strong" was deemed better for a parody.

Honestly, I agree. Bojack works as an in-the-know reference, and is also fleshed out enough within the show that a newcomer would understand what's being discussed.

At the time of this review, the Bojack Abridged movie has not yet been released, but this is easily one of the longest brick jokes in all of DBZA, since Episode 5 was released in 2008 and it is my expectation that Bojack Abridged will be released within the year, leaving in its wake an 11 year old callback.

When King Kai asks Goku why he had been sought out, Goku explains that the Saiyans are coming to Earth and he requires training. Excellent fade-in and musical choice for Goku's uncharacteristically serious speech to King Kai.

Of course, it gets cut off at the peak swell with King Kai's indifferent "sure", leaving Goku gobsmacked.

In this series, King Kai's indifference and easy acceptance of Goku is attributed to the mind-numbing loneliness of only having a monkey and a grasshopper (cricket, sorry) to talk to for the last 500 years. Goku agrees, as he couldn't imagine anything more boring.

Major flash-forward to Namek. Just this scene being here at all is a major instance of a sequence break. But it is the introduction of another exceptionally interesting character in the series.

In terms of placement, this works as a long-term cutaway gag and reminiscent humor but not much else. We're still about half a season away from even considering Namek within the story, and the Saiyans haven't even arrived on Earth yet. The decision to slide this segment into the middle of this episode leaves some serious questions in my mind. But at face value, it's not that bad.

We're treated to a solid ten seconds of just staring at a massive fat green alien while birds chirp in the background. We hear a fish go "plonk!" in the water, and Lord Guru calls for someone named Nail, who looks a lot like Piccolo, to approach him.

"I saw a fish. That was all, you can go back outside now." 

Definitely reinforces the point of boring. And while Nail is lamenting how boring his job is, Lord Guru tells him that he saw a bird and then promptly instructs him to "kick its ass."

But we’re not Nail, are we? We’re the viewer, and for some reason in the human mind, segments of extremely boring content usually pique our interest even more, because we have it drilled into our psyche that something is going to happen to break the tension sooner or later. That notion, the idea of slowly leaning closer to the monitor during the ten long seconds of a single still image, both conveys the boring tone of Namek, but also leaves the reader waiting in anticipation long enough for these dull scenes to just fade from their perspective and only latch onto the climatic moment. In this case, Guru commanding his apparent servant/bodyguard to assault a fish.

Not to overstate the obvious, but if it’s not the viewer’s own sense of tension and curiosity, it’s the pure absurdism and characterization of Guru that carries this scene. Disregarding source material, the design of Guru is meant to make him look old, wise and compassionate. Making him a lazy, annoying, verbally violent fatass is a near-infinite cash cow of writing material. It’s very difficult for me to judge this scene unbiased, knowing what comes next, but I imagine this would be a tryhard non-sequitur at worst, or promising potential for the future at best, with regards to this scene on its own, within the context of this episode and nothing more.

This episode also saw the genesis of perhaps not the first, but one of the most popular jokes in all of DBZA: Piccolo just jobbing the shit out of Gohan. DODGE! The scenes chosen and the delivery are outstanding compliments to this cheesy, simplistic joke. At this point I feel it's important to address that my editorial reflections or descriptions of these skits are relative to the context of these episodes. Even with the best of what this episode has to offer, we're still in peak 2008 internet humor era. The use of the word "outstanding" here will not carry a similar significance should I use it to describe a later episode.

Also the most random cutaway in all of DBZA, full-stop, is the brief look into the Hall of Justice, as Superman, Batman and Aquaman debate how they will stop the approaching Saiyans. This is humorous only in its absurdity, but less-endearingly than Guru was. Even if this scene makes zero sense, and relies upon an almost lower form of comedy than slapstick, Aquaman's voice is still just Krillin's voice. At least Superman and Batman sound different than the main cast. I'm really tempted to dislike this more, but the lackadaisical attitude and context of the whole scene definitely draws your eye more than a lot of the sensible but base-line plot progression of the story. I don't know if it belongs. To me, this scene just screams out that TFS is flinging spaghetti wildly at the wall, any and everything that might be funny, and while some of it sticks for one reason or another, (Jadoshin as Solid Snake, Antics on Arlia, even Guru's abrupt cameo) some of it flops. If anything, this show builds upon the corpses of its failures, and learns what works and what doesn't work surprisingly quickly.

Conclusion

Bizarre, but I liked it. Nothing in this episode that's bad is memorable. I might criticize the Namek cutaway for being out of place, but after letting this review sit for a few days, I just remember Goku saying "Man, nothing could be more boring than that!" and the immediate cut to Namek, and Nail pleading for the love of his sanity for something to happen. I might criticize the Justice League cutaway for being wildly out of the place, but I just remember "WHAAAAAALES!"

The meat of the episode was also decent, as it establishes Goku training under King Kai, and Piccolo's continued training of Gohan, the origin of DODGE! and the realization that Gohan can transform into an Ozaru. And you can nod your head and say that these may be necessary to the story all day, but they're also presented with... let's call it a clumsy grace. It's not bad, but it's miles away from official dub quality. This is in essence what the benchmark or gold standard was for early abridging back in 2008. The quality that TFS will continue to evolve the series into simply defies all logic or explanation, and in comparison makes these episodes look downright crude. 

But let's face it, if Episode 1 began with a person lying on the ground and shot in both kneecaps, Episode 5 shows that same person at least hobbling down the street to the hospital. 

It might not look pretty on the whole, and some of the dialogue might be clunky, but it seems like a lot of the flaws in this episode are simply caused by being products of their time.

Whether we're looking at Namek or The Hall of Justice, even the most outlandish oddities of this episode have still made me laugh. That's really the end of it.

Score: 75

Passing Thoughts

"I hope something exciting happens around here soon. I don't care what it is." - Ominous!

"You're surrounded by my thirteen elite *KABOOM* ...dead guards."

"SUMMON THE RANCOR!"

[femsff]

4, 8, 11, 13, 23, 30, 34, 38 :)

Oooh, awesome! Thanks. 

I’ve included already answered ones below.

A Writer’s Ask Game

agwitow:

Send me an ask with the number(s) you’d like me to answer!

The Basics1.     Do you listen to music when you write?2.     Are you a pantser or plotter?

Started out as a pantser but after a few fic, I decided to give plotting a try. Am now a fully committed plotter.

3.     Computer or pen and paper?

Definitely computer. My fingers tend to cramp up even when I write a little bit and when I write a page or so in a notebook (I often carry a notebook with me when I go somewhere but don’t want to drag the laptop with me), about 3/4th of it illegible to anyone who isn’t me. In a way, that’s a good thing I suppose considering some of my smuttier fics, but overall it’s just a pain. And I always get disappointed when I get around to typing out the notes because it looks like a lot more when written out!

4.     Have you ever been published, or do you want to be published?

No, I have never been published. Maybe one day I’ll try my hand at it, but right now I don’t feel like my writing is “good enough” yet. No idea for an original novel either.

5.     How much writing do you get done on an average day?6.     Single or multiple POV?7.     Standalone or series?8.     Oldest WIP

Oldest WIP I’ve written for or does plotting also count? If it’s just written, then it’s probably my abandoned Down the Rabbit Hole (FFnet | AO3). I just... got stuck. And it was so incredibly frustrating and really stopped me from enjoying anything fic-related that I finally just said to hell with it and dropped it. I just checked and I stopped working on it in 2013... I still have the outline and everything though, so who knows?

9.     Current WIP10.  Do you set yourself deadlines?

The Specifics11.  Books and/or authors who influenced you the most

To be honest, I have no idea. I don’t know, maybe I’m rare but I’ve never been one of those people who held specific authors up as their ideal. I used to read a lot of books (nowadays less so, because 1) am adult and have to adult and 2) because I read fanfic and often would rather write my own fic than read a book) and have some favorites  (all fiction) but nothing that really stands out.

12.  Describe your perfect writing space13.  Describe your writing process from idea to polished

Hahaha! Are you sure you want to know?

Okay, so I get an idea. Often when I’m half asleep/dozing, in the shower or just doing something mindlessly. The ideas are usually specific scenes that I can see play out in my head, but occasionally it’s just a conversation/some dialogue. If I like it, I’ll try to force more by really focusing on it. If the muse wishes it, that tends to work. I’m rarely super excited about an idea that I’ll start working on it right away, and prefer to let it roll around for a while. See if it keeps popping up and more details are added. If it’s worth my time and energy, I suppose.

Once that happens, I’ll start writing down notes. I use OneNote to organize my fic ideas/plotting and have one notebook that’s simply for ideas; one section per idea and depending on the idea, it’ll just be a stream of consciousness (often peppered with questions for myself) or a bit more organized in different pages. Again, depending on how excited I am about the idea, this can be done in a day or it can take weeks/months where I’ll occasionally add some info.

Then, when I feel like I want to work on it some more, I’ll start to delve into the details. When is it set? What’s the beginning, middle and end? Which events do I want include but have no idea where yet? Is there specific dialogue or are there actions I want to maybe include at one point? If it’s an AU, AR or AT, I’ll start working on the differences from canon (who is in it, what’s their role, how does it deviate from canon). How long do I think this fic will be? I need to set a max number of chapters for myself, otherwise the story will just keep growing and I’ll keep adding stuff and in the end it’ll read like I just came up with more and more stuff simply so I wouldn’t have to end the story, rather than telling the story I wanted to tell in the beginning. 

Anyway, I start creating pages for the chapters and fill in the few things I already know. At this point I often also involve my beta and discuss the fic idea with her. Everything from that conversation goes into the ‘brainstorm’ section and I’ll work on the questions and suggestions that arose during the conversation. Then, I’ll start focusing on filling up the chapters with general outlines. That can be anything from “scene 1 Sam telling Jack (Sam pov); scene 2 introspection about changes (Jack pov)” to a paragraphed summary or even a scene completely written out. Sometimes it’s just “some shippy stuff here”, to let me know that at one point I need to lighten it up or bring them closer together. I go over all the chapter pages that way, but don’t necessarily fill them all out. I also make one page with a chapter overview, which is usually the numbered chapters with one or two lines about the content so I can see in one quick glance which things need working on. 

More thinking on the fic idea, sometimes even when sleeping and brainstorming with the beta usually follows, which in turn results in adding more details. The chapter pages get more specifics or maybe a “don’t forget to mention [character]”  or “now [# weeks] pregnant, mention that/include symptoms”. Also, depending on the story idea, I might need to do research. That can be canon/fanon stuff, but also scientific stuff, maybe a different language, create background information for original/rarely used canonical  characters, timeline, locations, RL world events, and so on. That also gets included in the notebook and, at some point, added to the relevant chapter.

Once my outlining is done and I feel comfortable to start  writing, I tend to just create a master document and start writing. Now, that’s not to say my whole outline is complete or that it’s something I must strictly adhere to. Additions and changes are made all the time, sometimes I’ll get stuck or realize a scene doesn’t work the way I envisioned it or the beta tells me something is missing. So, I go back to the notes and work on it. Then I go back to the fic and write, write, write.

Oh and I usually ask the beta to go over a chapter once I’ve finished writing it (or, if I’m stuck in a scene, I’ll ask her to look at it right away) and then I’ll go over the feedback, make changes, possibly discuss some of the things she mentioned, do some more editing and then I’ll go to the next chapter and write some more.

14.  How do you deal with self-doubts?15.  How do you deal with writer’s block?16.  How many drafts do you need until you’re satisfied with a project?17.  What writing habits or rituals do you have?

Hmm. I’m not sure? I do know that when I’m stuck I tend to make a fruit salad or get snacks out in the hopes of it resulting in the required brainpower to keep going.

18.  If you could collaborate with anyone, who would it be, and what would you write about?19.  How do you keep yourself motivated?20.  How many WIPs and story ideas do you have?

The Favourites21.  Who is/are your favourite character(s) to write?22.  Who is/are your favourite pairing(s) to write?23.  Favourite author

I don’t think I really have a favorite author... I don’t like non-fiction, I always read fiction and often thrillers. Some of the books I always order and often reread are ones by Jilliane Hoffman and Ingrid Black.

As for fic, see my favorites/bookmarks on my profile on FFnet/AO3.

24.  Favourite genre to write and read25.  Favourite part of writing

Ooh, difficult to choose. I really love doing the research and plotting, but I think the best part of writing is ending up with the story you imagined before you even ‘put pen to to paper’. Also, managing to convey the emotions through the writing - like when a reader comments with how they also teared up, they had to stop reading a few times to catch their breath/get a grip on their emotions or were just overwhelmed by it all. That’s pretty neat.

26.  Favourite writing program27.  Favourite line/scene28.  Favourite side character29.  Favourite villain30.  Favourite idea you haven’t started on yet

I have quite a few fic ideas I haven’t started writing yet. Not sure I can choose one. But one that I’ve had for a long time, like ~6 years, and even started writing on (but then discarded that because it wasn’t a good opening) is for Woman In Blue. It’s a first-person fic, a style I actually kinda hate and would probably back-button right away if I saw one of my favorite authors use in a new fic... anyway, it’s Mark Carter in first person, writing about Sam (and to a smaller extent, Jack) and all the things he learned about her life after her death - she and Jack died in a blaze of glory, defending Earth against a Replicator attack that also prompted Disclosure.

The Dark31.  Least favourite part of writing32.  Most difficult character to write33.  Have you ever killed a main character?34.  What was the hardest scene you ever had to write?

There are so many scenes I’ve struggled with, most recently in Unmade Plans (chapter 8 specifically, that one really was a fight and I’ve rewritten it probably a dozen times) but the hardest was probably the Sam/Klorel scene in Only the Stubborn Survive. Those of you who’ve read the fic will know which scene I mean.

35.  What scene/story are you least looking forward to writing?

The Fun36.  Last sentence you wrote37.  First sentence or your current WIP38.  Weirdest story idea you’ve ever had

I’m not quite sure. A lot of them start out as weird ideas! The end result as you see them are soooo different. Maybe Consequences of Being Touched, because there were quite a few risque scenes in there?

39.  Weirdest character concept you’ve ever had40.  Share some backstory for one of your characters

The Rest of It41.  Any advice for new/beginning/young writers?42.  How do you feel about love triangles?43.  What do you do if/when characters don’t follow the outline?

It depends on the situation and the outline. I’ve thrown outlines out of the window at times because something else turned out to work much better once you actually reach that point in your story, but I’ve also rewritten a scene a dozen times before I got it exactly the way I wanted it in the outline.

44.  How much research do you do?45.  How much world building do you do?46.  Do you reread your own stories?47.  Best way to procrastinate48.  What’s the most self-insert character/scene you’ve ever written?49.  Which character would you most want to be friends with, if they were real?50.  [Other question—ask me anything]

Well, those were fun but also tricky! Guess I shouldn’t have skimmed the list before rb’ing, haha. No just kidding, I loved answering them. Thanks!

[actuallylorelaigilmore]

Writing asks: 6, 11, 17, 24, and 25 :)

yay thank you so much!!

6) something you would go back and change in your writing that it’s too late/complicated to change now

Oh my gosh, the first thing that came to mind is both too late and too complicated and from the ODAAT fandom. Now I have more than twenty stories on AO3 that include the character Schneider, but when I wrote my very first one I expected it to be a fluke: I had never written fic based on a sitcom, I was just trying to get it out of my head. So I can forgive myself for fucking up a really basic detail that would never happen with any of my regular fandoms.

In my very first story for ODAAT and Alvareider and Schneider…I gave him the wrong name.

He doesn’t actually have a first name that’s ever mentioned onscreen. That’s clearly a deliberate choice that I can see looking back. But when I was writing my first fic with him in it, I thought he had one and I must have missed it. I looked up his character, saw what the ORIGINAL ‘70s Schneider’s full name was, and used that without realizing my mistake.

If two people had read my fic and nobody had ever reblogged it, then I could maybe have fixed it and it wouldn’t even matter. But the darned thing has over 300 kudos on AO3 at this point and was reblogged here more than a dozen times. I feel bad thinking people might have read it and gotten the wrong idea (like I had at first) about what Schneider’s name is.

And the worst part is that even now, I can’t edit the post on my blog or the story on AO3 so future readers aren’t misled. Because the use of Schneider’s first name is a key plot point in the climax of the story, and him not having one in canon means that if my fic didn’t make the mistake of giving him one, it couldn’t exist. It’s a big tangled mess. Good question though!

11) what aspect of your writing do you think has most improved since you started writing?

Hmm, this is harder. I know I’ve progressed, but my mind goes blank when I try to compare past-me to now. I like to think that I’ve gotten better at revision, by a lot, and I definitely think I’m better at writing kiss/sex scenes now because I didn’t used to even try writing them but I have much more practice at this point.

17) if you could give your fledgling author self any advice, what would it be?

There isn’t one perfect way you’re supposed to write, so stop aiming for it and focus on improving your own style instead. There are no shortcuts, so learn patience. Have fun trying new things, but remember that no matter how many first drafts you start, what counts is how many revised stories you end up with.

24) have you ever become an expert on something you previously knew nothing about, in order to better a scene or a story?

This one I was so hoping someone would ask!! I’m super research-averse, I mostly write things that I can get away with imagining, but I’ve tried to grow into it more through writing fic, and I have two things that fit this question well.

I spent a silly amount of time watching Youtube tutorials on hula hooping for one story, because I don’t think I even met a hula hoop as a child, and I definitely wouldn’t be able to write it convincingly at all. I came away not just able to describe hula hooping, but with a good understanding of the mechanics and what it takes to pull flashy hoop moves…info I will never need again, lol.

For another story I wanted to make one character a spy in a historical setting and another a soldier who would have reason to encounter her even though they would both be far from home, but I realized the idea might be completely historically inaccurate–and yeah, it’s fanfic, so I guess I could have chosen not to care, but I did, so into the obscure historical websites I dove. I became deeply knowledgeable not just about Winston Churchill’s use of female spies in wartime but also about specific small groups of Australian troops that were assigned to parts of Europe before they were actually needed to fight in WWII. Since I’m not a war person and didn’t learn anything about Australia in school let alone Australian history (I didn’t even really learn US history, let’s be honest, TWW had to give me a foundation to build on), I’m really proud of that, actually.

25) copy/paste a few sentences or a short paragraph that you’re particularly proud of

This is from an older TWW fic I’m still really pleased with, in which Josh and Donna try to work things out after Lou hires her–because I wonder what that was like when it happened offscreen. I feel like I captured their voices well, and I adore the last line of this segment so much it’s like somebody else wrote it. I love that idea that Donna leaving changed Josh as a person, when he was always so resistant to change.

“So, what–you’re never going to move on, is that it? You’re not even going to give me a chance?”

He shrugs. “I’m done fighting with Lou. You have the job. What more do you want?”

“I want you to stop acting like it’s some sort of sacrifice to have me on the team. After everything we’ve been through, you know better.”

“After everything–” He cuts himself off as his voice raises to the embarrassingly high place. “We shouldn’t get into this now.”

“Josh.” She shifts closer. “What’s the alternative? You ignore me on the campaign trail, roll your eyes when you think I’m not looking, shut me out. How is that going to help us win?”

He raises his eyebrows but doesn’t respond. Some things matter more than winning. He knows that now. He’ll never admit it to anyone.

get to know your author

[kenbarrens]

Update 12/31/17: New Year

2017.  What a ride...

These past six months especially, I’ve really been pushed to redefine and harden myself as a person.  I don’t want to get into the details, but suffice to say I wouldn’t have survived without adapting, learning to open up and trust loved ones, and continuing to challenge myself.  

In a way, I’m glad to have had the opportunity to be challenged by something that flies squarely in the face of my ideals.  On the other hand, the situation I’m in has highlighted to me why we need more stories with positive messages and strong role models; To inspire us to keep striving to become more than what we are.

So, going into 2018, I’m taking a closer look at what I’ve got to see how I can dedicate it to a positive service for humanity.

FMN - PhInc: I spent today reviewing some of my ideas for Forget Me Not.  Recently, I’d dug up an old, non-canon sketch of Juni (the second picture attached).  This was sort of an AU where, instead of fire magic and necromancy, she used daggers and the speed of her wings to launch herself like a dart at enemies.  In this AU, she also has short-range precognition; While she can’t see far enough into the future to make predictions, at times she can see the next few seconds in precise detail and use that information to aide her reflexes.  This not only helps her dodge attacks, but also enables her to hone in on her target to ensure a critical strike, correcting her aim “frame by frame” to guide her blade exactly where it needs to go.  She’s all about moving as precisely as possible.

Today, I made a new sketch of Juni (top drawing), sort-of combining her latest redesign with this older one.  I didn’t choose a great pose for showing off costume changes (though you can see some detail as to how her coat works around her wings, plus a back-view of their newly simplified design) because I’m still experimenting with dynamic poses and foreshortening.  I also want to change up the presentation of the weapons; Rather than being decked out in steel and leather like a typical rogue, I want her to look a little more like a modern witch.  Instead of that wicked bone dagger (P.S. It looks like I completely recycled the design of the Cass from Maple Story on that thing anyway, so I definitely won’t use it like that), I’d sooner see her using a crystal rapier of sunset quartz.

I’m really in love with the idea of making her a badass knife-dancer, and especially with how I imagine learning those skills in the story will change her personality.  The struggle I’m having is this doesn’t jive with her story... at least, not yet.  All I will say for now is there’s a very important reason why she’s supposed to be a fire mage, but perhaps I can find a creative solution to give her access to this as well.  After all, she’s not supposed to have obvious magic in her world.  Maybe her story involves transmuting the gift she started with into something that works better for her, something that can speak to finding one’s self... I’ll have to keep thinking about it!

Krythe:  I’ve been doing a ton of research on psychic phenomena to pepper in.  Every single character is psionic, so I might as well make sure I know what I’m talking about!  This has slowed down the editing process considerably, but I consider it a positive change.  I’m pumping relevant content into the story to give it more credibility - that seems like something worth taking my time on as it’s going to affect the way I edit the rest of the story, and I’m still near enough to the beginning that I can afford another style change right now.

For example, this week I focused on rewriting the introduction of the primary love interest.  She contacts the main character through astral projection, but her scene wasn’t received well by the writing group.  I’ve rewritten most of it to better handle the mechanics of what’s going on psychically, right up to the point where the romantic attraction should be revealed.  It was too forced in the original draft, so I’m taking a day or two to contemplate how I want it to come out.

Else Society: Eh... I have mixed feelings on how this went.  Overall, I’m disappointed with it, though there are plenty of reasons why that could be/probably is my own fault.

The first day or two seemed uplifting enough, as the website echoes a lot of the feelings any creator trying to make sense of what they want would have.  However, after the third step, it kind of just... stops.  It provides a to-do list worksheet, but the worksheet really only has just a box to put in the item you wanted to do.  There’s little else beyond the meditation in the second step to encourage you.  Yeah, any type of program like this requires you to put in your own effort (and doing it through a week with a lot of social activity probably didn’t help), but when it ultimately boils down to “make a list... do it, good luck,” I don’t know that I really got anything out of this.

That said, I think I owe it a second chance.  I can say that I did notice forward progress, I’m just not certain that the progress I made this week is any more than I would have made without it.  Then again, I can admit I probably didn’t take the worksheet seriously enough, what with all the traveling and shuffling events around this past week.  It might be better to focus on developing my own routine though.

[jk-snoddy]

“DAMN IT, ICARUS!” Stories of Flying Too Close to the Sun.

Theme: RISK (...but mostly failure)

When I think about the creative risks I’ve taken in the past few years the first thing that comes to mind are the failures. In my eyes, the word “RISK” paints pictures of potential danger, humiliation, and disappointment. It’s like streaking naked across a college campus, in the day, at lunchtime. But it also paints the slim opportunity of being an outlier in that wide margin of likely failure. I faced this predicament when I decided to make my first narrative film in college. It was garbage, it pissed me off every step of the way.

Me and my friends, Denny and Joe, had banded together in the spring of 2012 and decided to start a film production team at our college. We made two mediocre music videos, did video documentation for hire, and thanks to Denny's big mouth telling any and every one that "WE HAVE A COMPANY!" we became known as "those video guys". I don't know where we got the gall to think that we were official in any way, but for some reason, we had our heads puffed up by our third gig. We felt like hot shit.

Fast forward to December 2012, it was near the end of the semester and Denny just kept talking about how he wanted to make this movie he’s had in mind for the past seven months. The idea had to do with a young male coming out of the closet to his father.  He was super gung-ho about shooting it and creating a story about LBGTQ characters. Although I didn’t connect with the story, the last time I made a narrative film was in high school. I felt this urgency to get behind the camera again and direct something that wasn’t a music video or someone's band in a basement. So I figured with a little common writing sense and empathy I could tell this story. So I told him “Fuck it, I’d be down. Let’s make a movie.” On the last day before Christmas break, I was called in for a production meeting in the school atrium. Before I could even blink, Denny had arranged a small quasi-core production team consisting of a screenwriter, David (who eventually became one of our main actors), our sound guy, Mitchell, and Georgina, our production assistant, Denny who acted as producer, and me as the director. Joe went MIA before the production began. Before the end of that day, I was sent a potential draft of the “screenplay” David had written. The ball was starting to roll a little bit faster than I was used to; this wasn’t all talk anymore. But I had to keep up. Don’t even get me started on the title the producer had in mind.

January was dedicated to editing the script that was written in less than a week. For some stupid reason, I decided to take part in some of the writing duties. For the entire month, I had my stale revisions shat upon by the team who would constantly go back and forth on what it should be and what it shouldn’t. February came and we were casting for each role, finding a cinematographer, setting up our Kickstarter page (we didn’t reach our goal), and trying to deal with our own classes/lives which were crumbling right at our feet due to mounting stress.  March arrived. The semester was halfway done; my personal work and my grades were suffering. The cast was finalized, and we were set to shoot during the week of spring break. I felt nothing but tension as the first shooting day drew closer. I didn’t have a decent night’s sleep since January. We reserved every Canon MK II and light kit that the film/animation department had to offer, along with sound equipment, batteries, and CF and SD cards. We had to keep track of all of this stuff. Every employee at my school’s equipment stockroom loathed us.

The first day of spring break arrived, principal photography was a complete nightmare. We had the police called on us for shooting near a restaurant, that wasn’t even on screen. It turns out that you can’t trust a fine art photographer to do the job of an actual cinematographer just because the camera has a video button. It was the first time I ever had to fire someone. The first week passed and we were missing so many scenes, the production dragged on for the remainder of March into April. After the first week, we lost our half of our core team. Our sound guy, Mitchell, was a Berklee student at the time and had to focus on finals (along with arranging our score and doing ADR). Our PA had to continue her own classes and studio work. We were down to a skeleton crew and we had to recruit our other friends who were willing to help out. Because we were using school equipment at the time, we had to keep checking out (and extending, and returning) cameras, lighting, and sound gear constantly. Everyone at the stockroom wanted to kill me.

Because we didn’t have a budget, we poured our non-existent cash into coffee and donuts for every set. Turns out you can’t expect an entire cast and crew to run off of Boston cremes. Nor can a 20-year-old subsist on junk food for a month straight and be a good communicator and college student. My diet for the majority of the semester consisted of Dunkin Donuts, black coffee, vending machine pastries, and Adderall. 

(There are only plain donuts left.)

This film was no longer a labor of love and enthusiasm, but a chore. We started off cock-sure of our abilities to make this movie, but the moment we got started we were hit with reality. Each day brought a new plateau of pressure and it was far too late to back out.

Being on set wasn’t an exclusively negative experience. Each day of shooting was a healthy learning experience that helped us understand what it takes to be a make a film. I was learning how to effectively express my needs to the performers and how to really direct a story through enforcing subtle undertones to their roles. Directing for me was becoming an intuitive process that became easier to tap into. Because we let our cinematographer go I took on the role of DP myself. It was rewarding because I was able to achieve the shots I was trying to capture in terms of the look and feel. It was hard, but it felt better shooting it than trying to relay shot ideas to someone who was always in their own head. But figuring out how to properly light a scene was more experimental, which meant using more time on set figuring out the composition. We powered through the month of April to get the final pick up shots that we needed and we completely wrapped by the end of the month.

As soon as the school year ended we were trying to set a hard deadline for the final cut before the screening date. FUN FACT: just because your producer is enthusiastic about being an editor, doesn’t give them the chops to actually cut together a movie. We screened the “final” cut to all of our friends, classmates, crew members, actors, and co-workers at the Fenway Health Clinic screening room. It was the biggest disappointment I ever had to sit and watch. There was audio out of sync, a lot of areas where my experimental cinematography style justed looked tacky and wrong, the stale writing was really prominent. It was a shit-show. Most of my classmates, friends, and other creative contemporaries had to sit through that film and I knew that they felt embarrassed for me. From the time that I saw the first rough cut, I knew that it wasn’t going to be the best thing ever. I was honestly hoping Denny could’ve made my stale shooting into something palatable, I was wrong.

The director is supposed to be the calm face of the production. Every day I brought my anxieties, neuroses, and vulnerabilities with me on set. My fragile ego at the time couldn’t handle outside ideas and criticisms from my producer (or anyone on set) because I felt I was CONSTANTLY RIGHT. The fear of not knowing what I was doing balanced the sting of being told I was wrong. I was like an open nerve of my own exposing. To this day I still think about this project and how I handled myself with the crew and actors. I was struggling to manage as a leader alongside everyone else’s opinion and hurrying the fuck up.  A bad day on set is pretty discouraging. But three bad days in a row, including class the very next day, then more filming immediately after, was like shooting my motivation in the face in broad daylight. 

It’s been a while since I made something of that scope. Mostly fearing to make the same mistakes I made the last time. But the fear of failure will never justify your losses when you never continued moving onward. That’s a big failing on my part as an artist and storyteller. Virgil Abloh (Founder of Off-White, Creative Director at DONDA, friends with Kanye West) said “Find the domino effect. Create the project that’s latent with intention and see what comes after it”. This slightly justifies the artistic risk in making bad work, learning from it, and continuing forward. Looking back, all I did was think about this project and see it as a critical failure on my end as a storyteller. When what I really should've done is embraced it as a part of the process. All this time I hated myself for how it came out, that I forgot that we, a group of early 20 something's, actually had the audacity to finish an entire movie.

I could go on and on about how the resources were bogus, or the lack of money and manpower held us down. But it’s inaccurate. There was no amount of cash or gear that could’ve saved us from ourselves. We took on way more than we should’ve, didn’t plan each step well, and we failed as a result. I think about the unnecessary urgency we had put on ourselves to get this film made instead of slowing down and using the standard process. The heartbreaking part was the toll it took on my personal relationships with everyone in the project. I wouldn’t have guessed how much the tension would fracture my friendships. If I ever get the chance to make a movie soon (god willing) I’ll walk onto the project with my battle scars from the last time. I’ll use paranoid due diligence to make sure I'm not creating a product that I'll look back onto 8 years and cringe about its inception.

[panpanpanini]

Thoughts on MLP The Movie: Unpopular Opinion Edition

(I made a small post about this a few weeks ago, closer to when the movie premiered, but now that the hype has kind of fizzled out I thought I’d take the time to fuss more in-depth.)

So... I really thought the MLP movie was bad.  Terrible.  I had sooo many problems with it, so where do I start?

Warning: SPOILERS AHEAD!! 

My two biggest complaints are:

1) The movie didn’t hold up in terms of quality-- nevermind MLP expectations, it was just a bad movie in general.

2) Target demographic was noticeably shifted (downwards), especially when compared to the show.

Let me start by saying I’m not at all notorious even among friends for being this grouchy, self-elevated, overreaching entertainment critic/analyst.  I can enjoy most things at face value, ie. MLP.  I despise fanaticism (not fandom, fanaticism), and I’m long past the mindset that if I like something, I have to be blindly uncritical of it.  

Please also note that I have not read the movie prequels or supporting media, and I went into this movie with only limited knowledge of those materials.

*deep breath*

(1) So, starting from the top: “It was just a bad movie in general.”

Visually, the movie barely held up for me.  Anyone who’s even had a basic flash animation class knows about this thing called ‘motion tweening:’ it’s an optimized process for creating movement, with which you can set a path for objects to move and deform as opposed to painstakingly animating each frame one by one.  It’s a much quicker process, but the (immediate) result often looks way more mechanical than its traditional counterpart and can often come off as... soulless, or even lazy.  It was unbelievably easy to notice this throughout the movie and it was a huge distraction for me.

You can more easily see what I’m talking about here.

As a side note, I was never really on board with the ToonBoom style from the get-go; I eventually got used to it, but I was never able to totally immerse myself in it-- the whole tweening thing just cemented my dislike for it.  

Continuing my comments on style, the new character designs were interesting, but... so many of them felt too disconnected from established MLP universe conventions.   In fact, the only ones I could only get on board with were the hippogriffs (with a preference towards their seapony forms).  My biggest problem with them has to lay in the fact that nearly all of the new characters-- background and supporting-- were bipedal, when in-show nearly every new race introduced has been on all fours like our titular ponies... and to add insult to injury, so many of them had hands!  Their designs just felt too distant for me to connect that they live in the same world as our pony heroes.  

Note: I realize most of these creatures inhabit lands self-defined by Celestia to be ‘beyond Equestria,’ but that doesn’t dismiss that they still felt like they belonged in a movie not prefaced with ponies.

(Tempest is a little different.  She was visually darker than most ponies than we’re used to seeing, and to the surprise of nobody the poster child for edgy pony OCs, complete with the perfect voice.  Unfortunately, her intimidating demeanor was sometimes too much for me, as it’s much more *effectively* threatening than what we’re used to seeing in-show-- the closest being the Shadow Pony in the S7 finale.)

On a more positive note, I really enjoyed the new environments.  Just the fact that we had new locations to begin with was endearing already, but unlike a lot of the other stuff (see above) they were on par with what I was expecting from MLP on the big screen.  I seriously think the environments had more character/place in the MLP universe than most of the (we’ll call them NPCs) NPCs that occupied them.

Speaking of character, I can forego most of what I’ve talked about above in lieu of a good story (spoilers: the story wasn’t even all that fresh, it was predictable and full of classic kid’s movies tropes).  What I can’t ignore is blatant out-of-character writing.

“But Salt Mom, if you hate out-of-character writing, why are you still watching the show post-season five?” -Most Starlight Glimmer Opposition

As I mentioned at the start, I still enjoy the show at face value.  We’re seven seasons in; our beloved ponies have seen some noticeable character development over the years, which is what some people (perhaps those ruled by nostalgia for the earlier feel of the show) like to label ‘out-of-character writing.’  But the changes are justified by their development, which is why I don’t see it that way.  The movie, however, seems to completely forego character development and reduces them to (at times, vapid) caricatures of themselves and the out of character writing is now completely obvious to someone like me who doesn’t typically enjoy ponies through heavy analysis.  

Pinkie was by far the most glaring.  Pinkie is already one of my least favorite ponies, so maybe I’m biased here, but she was for the most part written as comic relief.  She wasn’t a pony Grubber-- she did play the part of ‘voice of reason’ in the climax with Twilight-- but she had an irritating tendency to completely downplay the seriousness of their situation, as they all did (she was just the most obvious, second being tied between Dash and Rarity).  Since when have they all been so naive?  Except for Twilight, all our heroes had minimal speaking roles (and even more damning, speaking roles with substance), most notably Fluttershy.   

Other problems included the princesses (once again) being victims of weak writing-- they’ve been proven to be capable of putting up more of a fight than we were shown, jeez!-- for the sake of putting the Mane 6 in the spotlight, probably something some people would call ‘forced progression’ (related: bad pacing).  

... Which leads into the movie’s general issue with logic.  

OH BOY.  I had so many issues with the movie logic.  As mentioned before... the ponies’ general naivety, their blatant disregard for the grim nature of their situation...  Capper betrays them, doesn’t explain his reasons, doesn’t get a proper chance to apologize, and our ponies are totally cool with him by the falling action sequence of the movie?  Celaeno’s crew (and similarly, the seaponies) is swayed into changing allegiances with a simple, three-minute song?  The Mane 6 add six or so characters to their posse and suddenly it’s possible to take back Canterlot, after being overwhelmed so easily in the beginning, when the princesses weren’t yet turned to stone?  Really?  How could Tempest-- a pony who comes off as smarter than the rest-- be so desperate to have her horn back that she couldn’t foresee the Storm King’s betrayal?   

*angry flailing motions*

In summary: the animation was mechanical, character designs suffered from a serious disconnect with established MLP canon, and everything from logic to pacing to character behavior suffered from bad, trope-y writing.

---

(2) “The movie demographic was shifted noticeably.”

(A lot of what I’ve addressed above can also be applied to this section of grievances.)

Very few times have I watched anything in general and walked away feeling like a real dumbass.  This was one of those times.  Everything from the humor, the songs, the logic (see above)... it all came together to make me feel dumbed down and like a huge moron for even buying a ticket.  Overall, it was extremely apparent to me that they’d knocked the target demographic down a few years, and that the movie was made with younger kids-- rather than families as a whole-- in mind.  

The brand of ‘humor’ (I use that term loosely) employed by the movie has to be the cringiest one in the book.  It was clear that it was the most vanilla one they could have gotten away with and I found myself rolling my eyes a lot because honestly, none of it was funny at all.  Grubber was purely on the screen for comic relief (we literally don’t see him again after the finale); Pinkie’s naivety was obviously supposed to be funny, as were Rarity’s trademark dramaticisms-- They got close sometimes to pulling a laugh, but then it just... fell short and wound up feeling more pathetic and forced than anything.  Was it even humorous to the kids? 

I laughed literally once during the entire movie, and that was at a very transparent marketing joke (perhaps not deliberate) made towards the beginning, after the Mane 6 fall from Canterlot and band together to decide how to proceed.  They end up saying something to the effect of “hungry, hungry, hippos” as they’re brainstorming and I chuckled because... Hungry Hungry Hippos is also a Hasbro property. 

I thought I might be able to find solace in some of the songs-- I’d heard SIA’s contribution in the days leading up to the movie and thoughts it was a decent tune-- but alas... They turned out to be completely vapid, with the sole exception of Tempest’s song.  Compared to the extensive library of songs we’ve gotten in the show, the lyrics and melodies we got in the movie were neither clever nor catchy (I recall thinking that rhyming schemes were nearly non-existent) and I found myself waiting with bated breath until they were over.  “Time to be awesome?”  Blegh.  Completely forgettable.

IDK.  Maybe I need to see the movie again to confirm my position with it; after all, I had already decided I didn’t really like it before the end of the first act.  For the better part of a year I couldn’t get away from the hype surrounding MLP The Movie, but when I finally saw it it didn’t deliver on the same level and ended up being a huge let-down.  It was lacking in a lot of things standard to its TV-counterpart, including what makes the in-show universe so appealing (lore, memorable songs, and magic), and if they end up putting out a sequel I hope it can bounce back in the same way EQG2 built on the shortcomings of its predecessor.  

That’s all I’ve got.  If you’ve managed to get this far, thanks for reading.  ✌

(Bonus) Things I would have liked to see: an entire pirate fleet (instead of a single crew); more Capper and time spent in Klugetown; more Storm King and the land he comes from; the hippogriffs actually doing something (isn’t Queen Novo supposed to be friends with Celestia?) to contribute to the finale, even if it was them swooping in just before the final fight.